#oh well at least it's pretty. and fat. and guards my teas.

[hiyari8]

spiders will sit completely still for countless hours then suddenly vanish within the split secomd it takes u to blink

[charming-charlie]

The Compliment Game

Title // The Compliment Game

Pairing // Evan Buckley x Reader

Warnings // Light amount of cussing. Some cute fluff and a bit of spice at the end.

Summary // Buck poses as your fake boyfriend at a friend’s birthday party.

Word Count // 3k

You stared at the invitation before you, trying to hold back a laugh. Having just got the mail, you found a pink envelope mixed in with your bills. The envelope had elegant script and for a moment, you thought you were invited to a wedding. Upon opening the envelope and pulling out the card, your suspicions still stood in place. Glitter fell to the floor and the invitation was written in such a beautiful script, except it was not for a wedding at all. It was for a birthday party. Your childhood friend Viola’s birthday party.

The invitation included a dress code, which basically stated prom attire. Yeah, fat chance of that happening. There was also a list on the back of the invitation with appropriate albeit expensive gifts to buy for the birthday girl. Cool, so money it is!

The invite was definitely in line with Viola’s personality. The two of you were supposedly childhood best friends, and as you grew up, you realized that Viola was a bit of an embellisher. She told the most insane stories, some you knew to be completely fake since you were there when certain events happened. It was like she always had this need to one up everyone she met.

The two of you barely talk now since you distanced yourself from her, but honestly, she was still your friend. However, since Viola liked to embellish, who says you couldn’t either? Why not one up the birthday girl at her own birthday? Maybe she needed a healthy dose of her own medicine.

The wheels were turning as you grabbed your phone and scrolled through your contacts before landing on Evan Buckley’s name. He was, in all honestly, the hottest man you knew. While he was only a recent friend, he was the best option for what you had in mind.

You called him, hearing the phone ring a few times.

“What a coincidence,” Buck said when he answered the phone, “I was just talking about you.”

You were surprised that you were on his mind, especially in the middle of the day. You were sure he was at work too, which only seemed to excite the butterflies in your stomach.

“Hey,” you said, unable to hide your growing smile, “I got an invite to a birthday party. Want to go with me as my fake boyfriend?”

“Whoa,” you heard Buck say on the other line and you could just sense the confused expression he had on his face, “wait, what?”

You stared at the invitation, knowing full well that this would be the perfect event to have a little fun and maybe put Viola in her place. However, you took what few precious minutes you had on the phone with Buck to explain everything. You talked about your friendship with your friend, and how she just continued to make up her entire life story in order to appear interesting. It was either that or for attention, you weren’t sure which one.

“Basically, I just want to show off the hottest guy I know, so are you in or what?” you finished. You were out of breath from rambling quickly to share your story. You never knew when the alarm bell was going to go off because of a fire or something.

“And you thought of me? I’m touched. Sure, I’ll do it. But you owe me a beer,” Buck said. You could practically hear him grinning on the other side of the phone. “I’ll pick you up after my shift. Say, eight?”

You agreed and the two of you hung up.

This was perfect. Now the party would be very interesting. Who knew what was going to happen?

The hours ticked by and you were dressed. You texted Buck your address and waited for him to show up. He knocked on the door and you truly felt giddy and nearly pranced to the door in excitement. You weren’t looking forward to the party at first, but spending time with Buck? That was clearly a game changer.

Having relayed the dress code to the firefighter beforehand, you were in awe of his outfit choice. Buck was sporting a casual black suit. It wasn’t the fanciest of outfits but that didn’t matter. He looked like a stunner. It was nice seeing him out of his usual fire uniform or regular t-shirts. You could tell he put effort into his appearance for the night.

You, on the other hand, took a page right out of Princess Diana’s playbook. You wore a black dress, your favorite LBD, with some strappy heels. It was your own revenge dress, and you knew it wouldn’t exactly fit in line with the dress code of the night, but did you really care?

You were only going to support your childhood friend and nothing else. You had a card for her with some cash and that was it. You were going to make nice and leave when the cake was cut. That was called being a good friend, you at least showed up to the events you were invited to.

Viola’s parents owned a ranch and she lived in a house on her parent’s property. The drive was smooth, with you and Buck jamming to 80’s tunes and timing the red lights. He was such a charmer, just like he was the day you met him.

There were a few cars when you arrived, and Buck easily parked along the rocky path. Both of you got out and made your way to the front door. Being polite, you knocked.

The door opened instantly, almost like someone was literally waiting on the other side.

Viola appeared and your eyes almost popped out of your head. Apparently the “elegant prom” theme was still ongoing, since she wore a floor-length white gown. It looked like a cross between a prom dress and a wedding dress. Your eyes caught Buck’s, who was standing next to you. He looked horrified. Perhaps he was just now realizing your over exaggerations were not over exaggerations.

His mouth fell to the floor, not from awe, but from shock. The birthday girl cascaded along the floor. Her hair was done up in an elaborate bun and she wore a crown. Not a cute little tiara, but a full blown one thousand gems kind of crown. The kind of crown that was obviously from a costume store, since you knew Viola wasn’t fabulously wealthy like she pretended to be and there was no way she would be able to afford the same jewels as Queen Elizabeth.

“Oh, who is this?” Viola asked you when she saw Buck. No hello. No how are you. She just immediately noticed the eye candy on your arm with absolutely no regard for you, her supposed best friend.

You had to give the firefighter some credit. He cleaned up very well. He sported a business casual suit, not at all falling in line with whatever prom theme that was happening. Then again, you did not either with your little black dress.

“This is Evan Buckley,” you said, trying to put on the best sincere smile that you could muster, “my boyfriend. Happy birthday, Viola.”

Your best friend (although, let us be honest, that is a bit of a stretch at this point), did not seem convinced nor did she thank you for the nice birthday message. Instead, she turned her sights onto the man next to you, and you felt a small hole in your heart forming. If Viola went after Buck… it would not be pretty.

“Boyfriend, huh? What do you do?” Viola asked as she extended out a hand, and you cringed when you saw the white corsage that sat on her wrist.

Buck, being as polite as ever, shook her hand and kept his smile. “I’m a firefighter with the LAFD.”

“What a coincidence!” Viola said with a smile, “My boyfriend works for the LAPD. Maybe you know each other.”

Buck was catching on and there was a sort of twinkle in his eyes as he looked at the birthday girl. “I have friends in the LAPD. What’s his name? Maybe I know him.”

The fact that Buck was pressing for more information caught Viola off guard. She acted busy, acted like someone was calling her name, but you didn’t hear anyone. “Oh, that’s for me. I’ll talk to you guys later, yeah?” she sauntered off quickly, almost like she was rushing away as fast as she could so that you didn’t have a chance to call her back.

Buck turned to look at you with a quizzical expression as if to say, what the hell was that? You only shrugged your shoulders and whispered that Viola doesn’t have a boyfriend, ending the statement with a blatantly obvious eye roll.

The two of you made your way into the house where the party was in swing. No one else looked like Viola, no one else sported fancy gowns or black tie suits. In fact, a few of the party guests were wearing jeans. That must’ve been a highlight in the tea drinking gossip Viola was probably spewing in the corner with some other friends. Is it time to leave yet?

You led Buck outside to the fenced in backyard. There were a few guests here and there, but it wasn’t a massive turnout. Both of you sat on a wrought iron garden bench, away from most of the crowd. It was kind of nice to be there at the party but not really participating or engaging in small talk with the other guests.

“You know,” Buck broke the silence with a smile, “being your fake boyfriend is a lot of work.”

You rolled your eyes and turned to look at him, returning the smile. “You only agreed once I said you were the hottest person I know.”

“Listen, that’s a compliment I don’t hear often,” Buck sat back along the bench, keeping his eyes on you.

“Should I keep them coming?” you asked, and it surprised you that there was a little bit of a tease to your voice. You never noticed that before.

“How about this? You compliment me, I compliment you. I feel that is only fair,” Buck responded.

It took a moment for you to forget that you were actually at a birthday party for someone else. In this moment, on this bench, everything around you seemed to fade into the background.

“I like your suit.”

“I like your dress.”

Okay, starting out kind of simple here but it did make you smile. You thought you wore the dress to impress Viola. Maybe you wore the dress to impress him? Did your subconscious plan that?

“You are very good at your job,” you responded.

His eyes were alight and there was that twinkle again. You could stare into his eyes forever, they were stunning, just like everything else about him.

“Not exactly a compliment, you haven’t seen what I can do,” Buck said with a smirk. That was when he pulled the move. The fake-stretch put-an-arm-around-you move. What in the fresh hell was that? Because, and this is what shocked you the most, it actually worked on you.

“You’re beautiful,” Buck said.

Fuck, he won the compliment game. Your face flushed, fast and hard, creeping down to your neck and down your spine. You had to look away from him, and you heard him laugh when you did.

You didn’t get to enjoy the moment for long because you heard Viola approaching the two of you, with some minions behind her. You looked at her. Her white dress was absolutely blinding in the fading sunlight and you squinted just to see straight.

Buck stood up to greet her and you did the same, smiling politely at her.

“Sorry about that. Being the birthday girl means never ending attention. Anyway, Y/N didn’t tell me she had a boyfriend. How did you two meet?” Viola said. There was a sudden look in her eyes, and you knew. You knew she was catching on, pulling on loose threads to see what would unravel.

You felt Buck slip his hand in your own and he didn’t miss a beat. “Y/N locked her keys in her car. I just happened to be driving by.”

That was the truth. That was literally how the two of you met. If fate were a thing, you would swear that was how you guys met, through some act of divine fate. But you remained quiet.

“Forgive me, but I’m having a hard time believing this. If you are really Y/N’s boyfriend, then kiss her,” Viola said. She seemed to be smirking, like she trapped you and Buck in a corner, like it was a big reveal that your relationship with Buck was fake.

Buck inhaled deeply, like he needed to calm down a bit. His hand gripped yours tightly, but you could feel that it was tensing up. Thank god for that, because you didn’t know how he would react if you didn’t keep him grounded and firmly planted next to you.

“Y/N,” Buck said, and your head snapped to his attention. He was looking at you. Once your eyes fell into his line of sight, he swooped in. His free hand went to the side of your face, caressing the soft skin of your cheek. His lips landed on yours, moving delicately, gently. You were not in control of your body as you felt yourself pushing into Buck’s muscular physique. When he pulled away, your lips quite literally pulled down into a frown. You didn’t want the kiss to end, and it showed.

Once the environment came back into view and you were aware of your surroundings, you quickly fixed your expression and turned to look at Viola, who looked slumped and defeated in her white gown. Perhaps she truly felt she was going to win the game you and Buck were playing, and she wasn’t prepared for the outcome.

“Is that enough proof or do you need more?” Buck quickly looked at Viola, and he didn’t look very happy. Viola got the hint. She disappeared as fast as she arrived, with her entourage scattering in different directions. Once she and her friends were gone, Buck turned to you and said, “I don’t like that girl.”

You were still in a bit of a fog from the kiss, and you could feel your lips tingling for more. The sensation would not go away.

Eventually, much to your chagrin, it hit you. The moment was over, you proved your point. No need in keeping things going. You did your job, made your appearance with a devilishly delicious man on your arm, and now you can go home and leave Buck alone. He probably was not thrilled with the outcome of events, given the look on his face.

“I think it’s time to put an end to the fake boyfriend thing,” you said with a frown as you looked at him.

There was something new to his expression, an unconvinced look as he shook his head. “Maybe I want to be the real thing someday.”

Was this playful banter or was he serious?

“That would require going on a real date,” you said. You grabbed him by the arm, keeping up with appearances as the two of you walked to the gate in the fence. You unlatched the opening and watched the gate swing open.

“So ask me.”

You stared at him in confusion as the two of you slowly walked toward the car. It was starting to get interesting again.

“Ask you what?” you replied.

“Ask me out,” he said suddenly, not missing a moment.

Your heart was erratic at this point, and you let go of his arm now that the two of you were away from the party.

“Dearest Evan Buckley, would you do me the absolute pleasure of going on a date with me?” you said sarcastically.

He wasn’t playing games anymore. Without a warning, he had you pinned against the car, leaving very little wiggle room. Your body pressed along the passenger side door, and you felt his hands rub against your waist. You were facing him, and you wished you weren’t. Looking at that incredibly handsome face was becoming a weakness. Your knees shook as you tried to steady yourself.

He leaned in and whispered in a soft voice. “Try again.”

You felt his hot breath against your ear as he kissed the sensitive spot under your earlobe. An explosion of tingles erupted throughout your body as his lips brushed against your weak spot.

“What are you doing?” you asked quietly. Any louder and you were afraid how shaky and trembling your voice would sound. First, he won the compliment game, now he was winning whatever this was.

“Ask again,” Buck whispered in your ear.

One of your arms ran up his, and fuck, that was a mistake. The bulging muscles were almost too much for you to bare.

“Will you go out with me?” you whispered.

You felt his lips leave a trail from your neck, across your jawline, ending with a sweet peck against your lips as he smiled.

“I thought you’d never ask,” he said as he opened the car door behind you, “Let’s go get that beer.”

It was easy to slide into the car since you were already a puddle of goo. Your whole body was on fire just from his touch. Buck walked around the car and entered the driver’s side. He turned the key in the ignition and the car roared to life. His hand reached for yours and you accepted it instantly.

How in the world did the evening turn out like this? And where in the world was it going to go? You could only wonder as Buck began driving. Inviting him to a party as your fake boyfriend was the best decision you ever made, and you couldn’t wait to see what else was in store tonight.

[superhero--imagines]

Part 12

Part 1 Here! / Part 2 Here! / Part 3 Here! / Part 4 Here! / Part 5 Here! / Part 6 Here! / Part 7 Here! / Part 8 Here! / Part 9 Here! / Part 10 Here! / Part 11 Here!

* You stare at the blank ceiling, the smooth unblemished surface like freshly fallen snow

* you should really put some nudie posters up there or something to lighten the mood a little. 

* Light notes from the piano float around your room

* You sigh, so these are the facts as you know them:

* Edward is your best friend who has occasional bouts of brooding and flirtatious behavior.

* Bella is not albino, she has a lovely peach undertone, and a lovely grilled peach scent

* The entire coven has treated your attraction to this young lady’s blood like you got caught masturbating or wetting the bed or something

* “You don’t need to be embarrassed it’s a perfectly natural feeling.” Esme tells you while rubbing your shoulders

* “We’ve all been there” Rosalie reassures

* “Totally not a big deal, it happens to me everyday!” Jasper chimes in

* You wish sunlight hurt you so you could combust into flames on the spot

* The piano notes get louder, and you feel your mouth pinch into a frown.

* “Oh my god Edward! Read the room, I want brooding music!”

* Edward stops, up until then he had been playing a pretty cheerful Mozart piece

* You can tell he wants to ask why, you’ve been radiating joy non-stop since biology. But he decides against it

* “You really shouldn’t eat lying down.” He says as you sip blood while lying flat on your bed.

* “Okay dad.” You snort

* Edward starts to imagine what it would be like if you called him ‘daddy’

* All needy on top of him, your hands curled in fists against his chest, the breathy “daddy please” that leaves your mouth

* All of a sudden he’s ugly turned on

* “Ugh you’re no fun, I’m going to hang out with Rosalie”

* You leave the room and Edward has a total meltdown, is this what a kink is? Is he discovering a kink?!? At 100 years of age?!?!?!?

* Edward.exe is broken

* You don’t even make it to Rosalie’s room, you can smell them a mile away

* Broccoli, sugar and fat, and axe body spray. No peaches you realize with a sigh.

* They’ve only just barely rung the door bell when you open the door

* “Hey what are you guys doing here?”

* Jessica’s standing in front, looking pretty at ease, while Mike and Angela look equally uncomfortable.

* Makes sense, Jessica’s here all the time now either for homework or to watch TV.

* Mike and Angela haven’t been back since your sweet sixteen

* “How did you get down here so fast?”

* “I saw your car from upstairs” you say with a sheepish smile.

* You wish Alice would have given you a heads up, you weren’t planning on pretending to be human right now. Still you probably look raggedy enough right now in sweatpants and an oversized sweatshirt

* You can probably pull this sick thing off

* “We just wanted to check up on you, I heard from Mike and Angela you got sick during class.” And then in a more annoyed tone Jessica adds “And I guess you’re too sick to respond to all my texts and calls”

* Oh crap, where is your phone.

* You pat your pockets, and think when you saw it last

* “I left it in my locker” you smack your head. You told Edward to go grab your bag from class but you forgot your phone.

* “Hey don’t worry about it, I can get it for you tomorrow if you want.” Jessica rushes to your side and pats your arm. You shake your head

* “No I can get it myself, I’m fine I just ate something bad.” You mumble.

* You’re not missing school tomorrow. You would literally risk murder to smell Bella again.

* It’s not insatiable thirst like described in the books, more like a craving, like someone might have for nachos.

* It itches at you for a while, but if you just distract yourself long enough you can move on

* “Would you like to come in? I think Esme just baked cookies or scones or something.”

* Esme likes to bake for the smell and donate the food to the local shelter. That, or take it for her employees at her architectural firm in town.

* Firm is a loose word, she has maybe four employees, and they get one job a month, but it seems to make her happy.

* Angela and Mike give each other looks but Jessica perks up

* “Is she making those delicious earl grey scones again?” You sniff the air

* “I think she made some of that orange zest butter too”

* “Omg I am so happy you left your phone at school” Jessica giggles walking inside past you, you hear her greet Esme with a squeal

* “They really are good.” You tell them and your remaining human friends enter the house carefully

* “Soooo where is everyone?” Mike asks taking a look around your living room.

* “Ummm Rosalie’s in the garage, Alice is probably meditating on the roof, Emmett’s at swim practice, and Jasper’s probably at the barn.”

* “What about Edward?” Angela asks before Mike can ask about the barn

* Last you saw him he was playing the piano in your room, but it’s been a while since then

* “He’s probably in his room monologuing about the degradation of the American dream or something.”

* You lead them into the kitchen where Esme and Jessica are already deep in conversation about the wonder of her baking

* “-side is so light and fluffy, how do you get the tea flavor though”

* “Witchcraft.” Esme jokes, giving a full smile before putting another tray in the oven. Only Jessica laughs, the other two are too nervous to even sit down

* “Why don’t I teach you how when you come over next week.”

* Yeah you’re pretty sure Jessica is really only a fan of the “eating” and not of the “baking”

* You’re half surprised when she seems happy at the invitation. 

* “Oh that sounds great, I can’t wait for it!” Jessica’s practically beaming

* Where’s Edward when you need him? You wonder what her motivations are. 

* Jasper is not going to like this. He’s already irritated enough that he’s kicked out of his own house every Friday when Jessica comes over to watch arrested development

* Before you can say anything to Esme the conversation moves forward

* “Did you guys hear about that security guard that died in Mason county?”

* She’s just making small talk, you know that. But you and Esme instantly tense at the mention

* Carlisle had mentioned he thought there was a nomad wandering through, they were still far enough not to cause the coven immediate trouble, but anything that brought more attention to them was a disadvantage

* “My Dad says he heard from Chief Swan it was probably a wild animal attack” Mike mumbles over a bite of scone, you figured he would be the easiest to win over with food

* You hide a smile behind your hand, he really is like a golden retriever

* “What kind of a wild animal climbs stairs into a building” Jessica mumbles over another bite of scone. And maybe to fit in, or maybe because she’s always been a nervous eater, Angela takes a bite too.

* “Oh wow, these are really good” she murmurs

* Esme Cullen ladies and gentleman, winning the hearts of teenagers with baked goods since 19XX

* “Well you kids stay safe, stay together if you can.” She pats your head and you nod.

* You don’t know the details of the attack, you get the feeling Carlisle still see’s you as a kid and he doesn’t want to burden you.

* But assuming the small changes that have happened have nothing to do with the large changes, that means Laurent, James and Victoria will be passing through soon.

* Maybe it’s for the best Bella doesn’t get involved with Edward until later.

* You’d really like to not get all mixed up in the whole “James Thing” if you can help it.

* “Are you staying for dinner? I’m thinking of whipping up some pasta, maybe a chicken?” Esme looks to you, yeah you have no idea how she’s going to manage that. Besides the baking basics there’s no actually food in this kitchen. And the one upstairs is just for your blood bags.

* “(Y/N), do you think...Carlisle would mind if we used one of... his chickens?”

* His chickens? The only chickens in the house-

* “No Esme! My chickens are only for love and chicken snuggles” and their blood which tastes very leans yet rich. “Not to eat!”

* “It would just be one-we’ll eat your least favorite!”

* You’re really hoping this is her way of chasing the humans out because she doesn’t want to cook.

* “No- oh my god- we’re going to the diner come on!” You say tugging Jessica and Angela to stand.

* “It was great seeing you again Mrs. Cullen, see you next week!” Jessica shouts as the three of them follow you out.

* “Going out? Is that such a good idea it’s late and a school night.” Edward says as he descends down the stairs

* “Oh my god, yes Dad I’ll be home before my curfew.” You say before leaving, cue Edward crumbling onto the stairs as he imagines you calling him “daddy” again

* “I’m going to hell, I’m definitely going to hell.” He mumbles, his face in his hand.

* It’s a really short drive to the diner, also known as the only place to eat in Forks in the mid 2000’s. 

*There’s not even a McDonald’s. It’s almost sad

* And when you get there, while everyone moves ahead to the table you see a familiar face.

* “Oh, Hey Bella”

* Your eyes met and you figured it would be rude not to say anything. It looks like she’s here having dinner with her Dad. 

*She really does look like her dad, same eyes, same cheekbones.

* “Nice to see you again Chief Swan”

* “Nice to see you too, how’s Carlisle doing? Heard it’s been busy at the hospital.”

* “Yeah, it’s like he doesn’t sleep anymore.” You grin at your own joke.

* “Are you feeling alright now?” Bella asks, she looks genuinely concerned

* “Yeah, I um, made some questionable food choices at lunch.”

* There’s an awkward moment of silence. You get the impression that Chief Swan and his daughter are both the “strong silent” types.

* It looks like they’ve both finished eating already

* If you had known she was going to be here you would have made Edward come with you. 

* “Oh hey, do you want to join us for dinner?” It just seems like the friendly thing to do for the new girl, something on-brand with human character

* Definitely not because if you get on her good side now, maybe she won’t kick you out once her and Edward get married. 

*Father and daughter exchange a glance and the familiar connection they have makes you nervous. 

*“Of course you don’t have to, I know you’re here with your dad so-“

* “I’m sure Bella would love to join-“ Charlie says at the same time Bella says:

* “Wouldn’t it be kind of weird since I already ate.”

* Ah, so they’re not as in sync as you thought. 

* You give your best “Golden Girl - You can totally trust me with your daughter” smile.

* “I’m actually not eating either,” you place a hand over your stomach like a human might. “The uh, Clam Linguine is still haunting me, so I’m sticking to broth and sprite.”

* Why did you say Clam? You don’t even eat meat, it’s how you’ve been getting away with eating so little at lunch. 

* “not a lot of vegetarian choices” You say to your human friends who nod solemnly. 

* Father and Daughter exchange another look likening telepathic communication and they both move to stand

* “I’m going to finish up some paperwork at the precinct, don’t stay out to late.” Charlie says, leaning down to kiss his daughter on the forehead

* You watch with warm eyes and a small smile twitching onto your lips

* Bella is so loved.

* You can’t believe she’s willing to break her dad’s heart just so she can be 19 forever.

* Which, as you are 19 forever, you can fairly say is overrated

* “Hey guys Bella’s joining us.”

* Your female friends offer her a polite smile, you see Angela gaze flick from the menu to Bella’s face. Silently calculating the worth of this opportunity

* Any intel on this new girl would be pretty valuable

* Same old Angela

* Mike sits up straight so fast that he actually knocks his silverware off the table.

* “H-hey Bella, Hi, w-what, what are you doing here?”

* “Eating.” Bella says it so bluntly that you can’t help but laugh.

* Mike flushes bright red and Jessica and Angela exchange a look before giggling.

* “I thought it would be cool if she came over since I didn’t get to talk to her much.” You take a seat next to Jessica and Bella follows by taking the last seat between you and Mike.

* You still catch whiffs of her scent her and there, especially when she’s sitting so close to you.

* But it’s not so bad, the peachy smell is making you a little lightheaded, but you can handle it.

* At least you’re not fantascizing about killing her and everyone in this room like a certain dork you know.

* “Do you guys want to do that promotion where we get the basket of fries for the table?” Jessica asks

* “I don’t like sharing fries with Mike he eats them all.” Angela mumbles

* Yeah you remember last time when after a football game the three of them actually sat down and divided the plate in three equal portions

* They even measured out each fry dividing up the extra long ones 

* “Says the person who basically eats ketchup with a spoon.” Mike retorts and Angela scoffs

* “It’s America’s best condiment for a reason Mike.” Angela snaps back

* “I think we’re getting off track, I say Mike buys us all french fries to make up for all the times he hogged the joint basket” Jessica’s teasing but Mike takes it seriously

* “What so I’m a French fry monster now?”

* “Yes” Both Angela and Jessica respond in unison without looking up from their menu cards

* “What do you think Bella?” You’re surprised that Jessica’s the one asking. You get the feeling she’s not very happy about Mike’s crush on Bella.

* “I think Mike should buy everyone their own basket since he has such a bad history with sharing.”

* “You traitor!” Mike mocks hurt and you all laugh.

* You look at Bella through the corner of your eye, maybe it’s just the lighting but she looks pinker when she’s laughing.

* She looks happy as she starts contributing to the conversation.

* “I will say the pie here is really good, I wouldn’t share even if someone paid me to.”

* “Omg yes, the cheery icebox pie is out of this world” Jessica responds

* “I’m partial to chess pie” Mike pipes in and Angela laughs

* “You guys are crazy, the fruit custard they make is the best”

* You grin as your four new friends argue about the superior dessert, watching Bella laugh beside you.

* Welcome to team human Bella

Tags:  @moonlights27 @thebluetint @the100thtwilight @awesomebooklover17 @oneofthepotterheads @smileygirl08 @imdoingathingmom @iconicgguk @yrawn @alyciaswhore @little-horror-show @wicked-watering-can @lazydreamers @xxxmuxxx @puritanicalhypocrite

[sweetsubharry]

hey ! sorry to bother you but could you reccomend me some fics of footballer louis?? thank you !! love your acc

Hiya!!  💖you can never bother me!! ^-^ ohmgosh I’m so glad you like my blog! I love footballer louis djskasdhjag tysm(sorry it took soooo long!)

please make sure you read the tags and stay safe everyone!💖

Also these are not in any particular order, however I will say the first two are probably my favourites ;) I have to read them again right after this!

freeze this moment in a frame and stay like this by rosesau

Harry (not so) secretly crushes on the cute footie player and fills pages with sketches of him.

Don't Stop Thinking About Tomorrow by 1Diamondinthesun

Harry spends most of his time in an empty house or a lonely darkroom, dreaming of leaving his small town for art school. He's invisible to most people. And then Louis Tomlinson sees him. Life will never be the same.

Or, the American high school AU loosely inspired by She's All That.

Definition of Beauty by zanni_scaramouche

“Your book is upside down.” Harry nods at Louis’ book, his history text now that he sees it too.

“I’d rather study you.”

They both blink, startled by the slip.

“With you. Study with you,” Louis rushes to say. “Liam says I’m shite at history, can you help?”

Louis’ caught off guard by an omega he nearly takes out with an errant footie ball. It’s not that Louis’ never seen Harry before, it’s that he can’t stop looking, and he’s desperate to figure him out.

Coffee Cups and Football Boots by kimtaedumb

Harry’s stood behind the counter again, but this time he’s painting his nails. Louis strolls up to the counter and, thanks to his no brain-to-mouth filter, blurts out, “Isn’t that a little girlish, Haz?” leaning closer to inspect.

Harry lets out a little huff as his hand slips, “Oh, damn, now I’ve messed it up,” he pouts and turns to Louis, “Why should making myself feel pretty be girly?”

Louis holds up his hands in surrender, “’M not judging, jus’ curious is all.”

(The entirely cheesy and cliché Christmas AU, in which Harry doesn’t give a damn what people think about him – mostly – and Louis may be a little bit in love.

Alternatively, the one in which Harry owns a café that’s barely scraping by and Louis is a footballer and he takes Harry away for Christmas.

Featuring Zayn as a cocky little shit that most definitely needs to be put back in his place, Niall as the loveable Irish dude who drinks too much and flirts with Zayn more than the average girl, and Liam who loves everyone but hates them all at the same time.)

Way in the World by flowsque

When Louis Tomlinson enters the waiting room, Harry can distinctly feel his heart sinking to his stomach. The man's hair is ruffled and dishevelled and his red jersey, damp with sweat from training, clings to his perfect and chiseled body. He stands there, almost unreal, against the glass door, peering inside the office. Harry knew this would’ve happened, sooner or later. That he would have bumped into him. They play for the same club after all, even if they’re in different leagues. It’s not weird. It is not. Except it totally is. - Or, the one where Harry has a knee injury and an embarrassing crush on Manchester United's pretty number ten.

I Long For You by AnotherAnonymousWriter

Thirty minutes later, he's sat on a bench in Hyde Park with a book in his lap and a travel mug with hot tea in his hand. Not far from where he's sat, a group of boys are playing football and a bunch of children are chasing each other. Life is good.

Or at least, life is good until he hears a familiar “LOOK OUT!” and sees a football flying in the direction of his face.

And then everything is black.

(Harry gets hit in the head by various objects and falls for a boy with blue eyes.)

ease the quiet and talk me down by cabinbythesea

Harry's a model and Louis' a footie player.

(Louis teaches Harry some football and Harry is insanely good at giving a lapdance).

Baby, It's You by Bearandleonardwrite

"Oh, yeah. Um..” Harry lets his hands fall to his sides. His brows furrow, face full of concern, and he asks, “You’re not, like, stalking me, are you?”

Louis can’t help the loud cackle that escapes his lips and immediately slaps one of his hands over his mouth to muffle the sound. “Oh my god, Harry, no!” Louis tells him, a little breathlessly, giggles still bubbling out of his chest. “Lottie’s one of the makeup artists here today and she somehow got me to agree to come. I had no idea you modeled for, uh.. this brand until I saw you walk.”

“Oh,” Harry says dumbly, eyebrows still pinched. He lets what Louis just said sink in before a bright grin takes over his face and he goes back to doing up the buttons on his shirt. “Well, that’s alright, then. I’m glad you could make it.

(Basically, Louis' a footie player for Man U and Harry's a YSL model. They meet at a masquerade.)

Touch by kotabear24

Harry's shy and virginal with a past, new on the football team; Louis' the (experienced) popular star of the team and Harry's new mentor.

Come In and Change My Life by lightswoodmagic (sarah_writes)

He’d had the same neighbours since he’d moved into the building, a lovely, wealthy couple in their late sixties who had always invited him around for tea on Sundays. Martha had dropped off homemade biscuits the day he’d moved in, so Harry figured he may as well repeat the sentiment. He could hear someone getting closer to the door just as a flush ran through his body; oh fuck. His heat was close, too close to be knocking on a potentially unknown alpha’s door, but it was too late. The door swung open, and Harry’s mouth dropped. He’d never been overly interested in football, couldn’t find the fascination in watching men run around after a ball for hours aside from their uniforms, but he knew who this was. Louis Tomlinson, alpha, captain of Manchester United, star in a number of Harry’s heat addled fantasies, was his new next-door neighbour.

Or, Harry and Louis become friends when Harry looks after Louis' cat during away games, until one night at a party changes everything between them. It's just a shame Louis' going to be away for the FIFA World Cup for three months.

see the truth (it's me for you) by orphan_account

If you asked Louis the first day of his French Literature class what he’d be doing on the last, he’d probably never have guessed it would involve helping a poorly Harry Styles study for the final exam. Good thing he’s not a betting man.

(Or the one where Louis and Harry spend an entire semester ignoring each other after a one-night stand, only to come face to face when Harry manages to catch the stomach flu during finals week. Sometimes fate is funny like that.)

Use Your Words by zedi

based off this prompt: collage au where jock!harry always serenades flowercrown!louis with love songs in their music class. what nobody knows is that harry actually kinda means the words he sings.

But instead it's Louis as the jock and Harry as the flowerchild because I do what I want.

Stop The World (I Wanna Get Off With You) by ilikepianos

"You like this, don't you?", he asks breathlessly.

What? Sucking cock? Being dominated? Yes, all of that. A big fat yes.

Harry nods, lips still wrapped around Louis' throbbing dick.

Louis' lips curl into a smirk. "Keep going then. You're doing amazing, love."

OR: The uni-football AU where Harry may or may not have a minor crush on the captain of the team and suddenly discovers that the feeling is very much mutual.

Picture Perfect by LittleBubbleStyles

an AU where Louis Tomlinson is a misunderstood football player, and Harry Styles is a misunderstood photographer. Somehow, they're understood together.

I just think about my baby; I'm so full of love I could barely eat by mercutionotromeo

Harry and Louis are six hundred miles apart, but they have the same solutions to the same problem.

Or: a masturbation drabble featuring pillow humping, locker rooms, and copious amounts of dirty talk.

into another (another) serotonin overflow by mercutionotromeo

Harry wants this year to be different - wants it to be the year that he finally gets over this stupid crush. He’s going to uni, he needs to decide what he wants to do with his life.

Instead, he’s deciding what he wants to do to Louis Tomlinson.

Or: Sweet first time sex wherein Harry's adorably awkward, Louis is achingly cool, and Harry rides Louis wearing his jersey.

note: it says it in the tag but this is the edited version written in 2019, rather than the 2017 original- so there’s two put I put the link for the newest one :)

need a little sweetness in my life by mercutionotromeo

Harry's always liked feeling desperate and small when Louis touches him, but when he sucks Harry off...it’s fucking otherworldly. Desperate’s not really the word at that point - it’s helpless. Like… like the fucking world could stop spinning and Harry wouldn’t be able to do anything about it until Louis finished him off with his lips and his tongue.

Or, Harry and Louis go to university together. Harry really likes it when Louis sucks him off, and Louis really likes it when Harry calls him Daddy.

(Sequel to "into another serotonin overflow")

I made a map of your stars by brightbluelou

Harry does not have a crush on Louis Tomlinson. Yes, Louis is very pretty and funny, and Harry may have had more than a few inappropriate thoughts about him, but he certainly doesn’t like him. (Except for the fact that he totally does.) or, Harry is the shy boy in the back of the class that no one really notices. Louis is the loud, outgoing football player that everybody likes.

We Made These Memories for Ourselves by supernope

Breath held, Harry squints his eyes open and focuses on the first stick. A blue line. Harry breathes out an unsteady breath. He’s pretty sure he read that one blue line is a negative, but he fishes the box from the bottom of the pile just to make sure.

“Negative,” he confirms, voice echoing around the small room. “Next.”

Now that he’s feeling a little less shaky, he scans the rest of the tests at once, is met with a headache-inducing mixture of pink plus signs and blue double lines. His heart rate picks up until it’s pounding triple-time in the base of his throat and the pit of his stomach, thundering in his ears and throbbing in his temples. He flips over the rest of the boxes slowly, but he knows what they’re going to say before he even looks.

[or, Louis is a footballer, Harry owns a bakery, and they're having a baby.]

Kiss Me on the Mouth and Set Me Free by ls2k14   

Louis has his head thrown back in a laugh, his wet fringe hanging in front of his eyes, and a beautiful flush to his cheeks. From this angle, the sun hits his face just right to where the beams of light are shining in between the spaces of each individual clump of watered down eyelashes. His chest is showing through the soaked material of his white jersey and it seems that his biceps are attempting to break free from the sleeves that are clinging to his skin.

And Harry can do nothing except take it all in. He doesn’t even think he’s breathing at this point. He is literally stuck in place, admiring the true beauty of Louis Tomlinson, while being surrounded by fit footballers and generally attractive people. He doesn’t think he’s ever been in love before, but if Louis let him, he’s pretty damn sure he could change that in the matter of a few nanoseconds.

[blackhakumen]

Mini Fanfic #690: Little Miss Rabbit's Approval (Sonic X Crash Bandicoot)

1:24 p.m. at the Rabbits and Chaotix's Household.......

Tails: (Standing in Front of Cream's Room Door with Coco and Amy Beside Him) I wonder what's taking Cream so long to set up her Tea Party......

Amy: (Does a Proper British Accent) The preparations of any Tea Parties must be set up with Elegance, Grace, and above all else, Love. (Giggles A Little While Talking Normally Again) .....Or at least that's what Cream always tell me.

Coco: So this Cream girl..... What's she like?

Amy: Only the most precious little angel you ever lay your eyes upon!~ You would've loved her already.....If a CERTAIN LITTLE FOX would've told her about you beforehand!! (Turns to Tails with a Pouty Look on her Face)

Tails: (Place his Hands Up in a Bit of Defense) H-Hey! I'm sorry about that, alright? I just...(Starts Rubbing the Back of His Head Back and Forth Nervously) Kinda forgot about doing so at the time, you know?

Amy: No excuses, young man! Cream is our precious little sister and it is crucial for her to know about these things!

Tails: ('Sigh') I know. I know.

Coco: (Giggles Softly at the Duo's Quarrels) So she's pratically the cute little sister of the group?

Tails: ('Sigh') Pretty much. (Smiles Softly at Coco) But Amy's right though. Cream is the most precious little bunny in the world. I'm sure she'll love you in a matter of seconds.

Coco: I hope so to be honest. I kinda wanna make a good impression on her already.

Tails: Don't worry. Your first impression is gonna be amazing. Just keep being who you are and you'll be just fine.

Coco: (Stares at Tails for a Brief Second Before Smiling Brightly and Confidently at him While Nodding) Right. Thanks, buddy.

'Door Opens'

Charmy: (Walks Out of Cream's Room With Cheese While Wearing Sun Glasses, and Turning to Coco) Are you Coco Bandicoot?

Cheese: (Turns to Coco While Lowering his Shades a Little) Chao Chao?

Coco: Uhhhh....Yeah. That's...me alright. Why ask?

Charmy: (Presents Coco to Cream's Opened Room Door) Ms. Rabbit would like to see you now.

Cheese: (Simply Nodded) Chao Chao Chao.

Coco: Oh. Uh... sure. Don't mind if I...(Slowly Walk into Cream's Room) Make myself in.

Tails and Amy follows behind Coco until Charmy and Cheese quickly went in front of them and stop the duo ij their tracks.

Charmy: And where do you think you two are going?

Amy: Uhhh.... We're going inside the room? For the Tea Party, remember?

Charmy: Yeah. Sorry. (Crosses his Arms) But I'm afraid we can't let you do that. You guys are staying here until further notice.

Cheese: (Crosses his Arms As Well) Chao Chao.

Tails: ('Sigh') Charmy, let us pass already.

Charmy: Did you not just hear us? We said you're staying here.

Amy: (Place her Hands on Both of her Hips) Charmy, you and Cheese let us in or I'm gonna tell Vector and Vanilla that you two have been misbehaving while they're gone.

Charmy: (Gasps Before Glaring at the Pink Hedgehog) You wouldn't.....

Amy: (Takes Her Phone Out of her Skirt Pocket While Having a Smirk on her Face) Watch me. (Slowly Begins to Tap on the Screen)

Charmy: ('Sighs in Utter Defeat') Fiiiiiiiiiine. (Step Away from the Entrance of Cream's Room on his Side) You guys may enter....

Cheese: (Floats Away from the Entrance of Cream's Room on his Side) Chao Chao.....

Amy: (Happily Walks into Cream's Room While Patting Charmy and Cheese's Head Along the Way) Thank you, boys~

Tails: (Follows Behind Amy While Giving the Boys a Shrug Along the Way)

Charmy: (Turns to Cheese) We really need a raise from this whole guarding business, Cheese.

Cheese: (Nodded in Agreement) Chao Chao.

Couple of Seconds Earlier......

Cream: (Sitting on Her Tea Party Table While Wearing One of Vanilla's Fancy Church Hat's) Ah. Ms. Coco Bandicoot, I presume. (Takes a Pretend Sip on her Empty Teacup While Looking at the Bandicoot) Care to have a seat?

Coco: (Oh my gosh. She really is adorable!~) (Comes Back to Reality While Clearing her Throat a Little) Yeah. Um... Don't mind if I do...(Slowly and Steadily Takes a Sit on the Kids Size Chair While Also Taking a Bit of a Deep Breath) Soooo....You must be Cream, huh? (Smiles Brightly (And a Bit Nervously)) It's nice to finally meet you in person.

Cream: Likewise. Granted, it would've been to meet each other sooner, if a CERTAIN BIG FAT DUMMY HEAD TOLD ME ABOUT YOU BEFOREHAND!!! (Angrily (And Adorable) Pouts at Tails Whole has Just Stepped into her Room with Amy)

Tails: (Sighs While Feeling a Tad Bit Guilty) Cream, I'm sor-

Cream: (Starts Wiggling her Finger at Tails) Nonono. We are going to have a long talk about this later, mister.

Tails begins to pout a little himself while Amy place a hand on his shoulder with a bit of a sheepishly smile on her face.

Cream: Right now....(Turns to Coco) I want to speak to your newfound friend some more.

Coco: Sweet. So uh....What you wanna talk about first?

Cream: Well, for starters, I would like to how you and Tails first ever met.

Coco: Oh. Well, it was a couple of months ago. We met at this really cool Technology Store at the Smash District Mall. (Smiles Brightly) We've been best buds ever since.

Cream: I see.....(Have a Bit of a Suspicious Look in her Eyes While Slowly Taking a Pretend Sip of her Teacup Before Putting Back Down on the Table) So....Since you two have been friends for that period of time, it means you love him very much, correct?

Coco: (Smiles Brightly) Well, yeah. Why wouldn't I be? I love him a lot!

Tails: (Immediately Starts Blushing to Coco's Words)

Cream: Really? So much so that you'll do ANYTHING for him?

Coco: (Giggles Softly) Definitely, if I needed the help. And trust me, he would do the same for me too. We got each other's back after all.

Cream: Oh... Really? I-If absolutely so, then....then....t-then.....(Suddenly Begins to Groans Heavily) I can't take this polite posture anymore!!! (Pouts at Coco) I am sorry, Ms. Coco, but I'm afraid that I do not approve of your friendship with Tails right now!

Coco: (Eyes Widened in Genuine Surprise) Wait what?

Tails/Amy: (Eyes Widened in Complete Shock) What!?

Tails: Cream, why not?

Cream: I don't know. It's just....('Sigh') What if she starts being mean o-or disrespectful to you one of these days?

Amy: Cream, sweetheart, I promise you that wouldn't happen.

Coco: (Frowns a bit Sadly at Cream) Yeah. I would never do that to him.

Cream: I know, but....I-I mean, it wouldn't hurt to be cautious about all of this!

Coco: Cream, are you are really worried about your big brother's well-being?

Cream: ('Sighs in a bit of Defeat') Yes. I am. I mean, why would I be? Tails is the most precious fox I've ever met.

Tails: (Starts Blushing Again) Hey! I-I not that precious...

Amy: (Lovingly Hugs Tails) Yes, you are!~ You're the most precious fox in the whole wide world~ (Gives the Two Tailed Fox a Kiss on the Cheek)

Charmy: (Turns to Tails from Outside of Cream's Door) Yeah. I'm younger than you and even I believe that's the case.

Cheese: (Turns to Tails as Well While Simply Nodded) Chao Chao Chao.

Tails: (Starts Rolling his Eyes While Blushing Some More) Not. Helping, you guys.....

Cream: He means so much to me and I want to make sure he's happy and in good hands. (Looks Away From Coco a Bit Shyly) I know it might be overprotective of me to say all these things, but that's exactly how I feel in the moment.

Coco: (Stares at Cream for a Few Seconds Before Slowly Smiling a bit Softly) Hey. Cream?

Cream: (Slowly Turns Back to Coco) Yes?

Coco: I know we just met and everything, but can I fill you in on something?

Cream: (Thought About the Request for a Brief Second Before Nodding) I suppose so. What is it?

Coco: You see, to tell you truth, Tails is.... literally the first friend I've ever made.

Cream: ('Gasps') Really?

Coco: (Simply Nodded) Yep. I live in an island with my big brother, his girlfriend, and a talking, magical mask name Aku Aku. I've been close to all them for so long that I've never really had the chance to make any friends outside of that island. That is....Until I met Tails those couple of months ago. He's the most sweetest, intelligent, compassionate fox I have the pleasure of even meeting. And like I said before, I promise you, from the bottom of my heart, that I would never EVER do anything to hurt or betray him like that because he means so much to me and I really love him a lot.

Tails: (Almost at a Loss of Words) Coco....

Coco: And you're right....(Turns to Tails) Tails is a precious little cinnamon bun~ Probably the biggest one there is~ (Winks at her Best Friend)

Tails: (Immediately Starts Blushing Yet Again) Y-You too, Coco!?

Coco: (Playfully Shrugs at Tails) Whaaaaat?~ It's the truth, isn't it?

Amy: (Simply Nodded While Still Hugging Tails) It is!~ Very much so in fact~

Tails: (Glares at Amy) Amy!

Cream: (Giggles Softly at the Whole Scene) Okay. Okay. (Gets Up from her Seat and Make her Way to Coco) I think I've finally starting to understand now.

Coco: (Quickly Turns Back to Cream) Really? So....does that mean-

Cream: (Happily Nodded) Yes. Starting today, I hereby approve of your friendship together. (Gives Coco a Somewhat Loving Hug) Please take extra good care of my big brother Tails for me~

Coco: (Giggles Lightly) Don't worry, kiddo. (Hugs Cream Back) He's already in good hands.

Cream: Thank you. It makes me so happy to hear you say that.

Tails/Amy: (Already Starts Gushing Over How Adorable Cream and Coco's Hugging Together Are) Awwwwwww~

Cream: (Turns to Tails and Pouts at Him) But I'm still mad at you for not telling me about her sooner, Tails!

Tails: (Sighs While Rolling his Eyes) I'm sorry, Cream, alright? It never came into mind to do all of that up until now.

Cream: No excuses! I'm suppose to the little sister of our lovely group of friends! So it should be very crucial to tell me these kinds of things.

Amy: (Whispers into Tails' Ear) Told you so....

Tails: (Sighs Once More) Look, I'll do anything I can to make it up to you. I promise.

Cream: (Slowly Raised an Elbow) Anything?~

Tails: Yeah. Anything you want. Just.... don't ask for anything too extreme, okay?

Cream: If that's so, then can we all watch a movie together in the living room?

Tails: Yeah. Sure. We can do that no problem.

Cream: Can we watch a princess related movie?

Tails: Any of them you wanna watch is good enough for all of us.

Cream: With love and cuddles along the way?~

Tails: (Chuckles Lightly at How Adorable Cream is Being Right Now) Yes. With love and cuddles all around.

Charmy: Ooh! Can we drive your airplane after that!? Do a loopie loop five or ten times?

Cheese: (Smiles Excitedly) Chao Chao?

Tails: (Eyes Widened in Fear) Okay! Let's not get crazy here!!

@26shann

@keyenuta

@lovekittynoir

@ma-lemons

@albion-93

@miki-13

@caleb13frede

@bestpony666

[spnwriter]

make me yours part 1

I love hunting. I love hunting with Sam and Dean. Don't get me wrong when I say, I hate going out with them. After hunts Dean liked to go to the bar to "blow off steam" as he says. It's nothing personal, or anything they do to make me feel this way on purpose anyway. Most nights I can handle it, it's nothing I'm not used to. I never miss the sideways glances, uttered insults and even the confused stares as to why a girl like me is with these Greek gods. I've had a bit of extra meat on my bones, a bit of jiggle in my walk. I know I'm not most guys cup of tea and I get that. Tonight however the case didn't go well. Some vampires had been turning girls at some night club using free drinks. We needed bait to catch the guys responsible. Sam had the brilliant idea to use me as the bait (a fact Dean was so not pleased with). I tried to tell them it wouldn't work but no one listened to me. So I dressed up and got it done...only it didn't go as planned. The Vamp rejected me...pretty harshly to be honest but I told them that was going to happen. Luckily I had a plan B so I made sure to get him alone before he could be an asshole. With the hunt done, all I wanted was a shower, some form of chocolate and to watch Dr. Sexy MD in my fat pants. That however is not how the night went Dean didn't allow me to say no, not that I would have not to him. Surprise, Surprise I have a pretty massive crush on the older Winchester. The typical fat girl likes a guy she'll never have.

As soon as we hit the doors, I noticed the looks the girls in the room looked me up and down. I frown, I don't think I can handle this tonight. I push it down and sit at the table as Dean goes to get the drinks. Sam silently observing me, he's trying to sus out how I'm feeling. I turn to look at the younger hunter.

"Talk to me." Sam's voice cuts of my thoughts

"There isn't anything to talk about." I sigh

"Y/N." Sam frowns

"Look, it's nothing new. Sam I'm fine."

He gives me a sideways glance but doesn't get a chance to say anything as Dean comes back to the table setting the drinks down.

"You see the bartender?" Dean smirks throwing a glance over his shoulder at the busty blonde.

Here we go, I think as I grab the beer taking a long drink. I know I shouldn't be jealous. He doesn't even know I have feelings for him not that it'd change anything. I know I'm so not the girl he goes for. I tune him out, not wanting to hear him go on about some girl he's probably going to go home with. Ordinarily, I could handle him without too much hurt on my part but the words from the vampire echoing in my head. I know the opinion of some monster shouldn't bother me all that much but, it's not the first time I'd hear them. Tonight is going to be a drown my sorrows in alcohol night.

"I need another drink," I announce probably cutting one of them off.

I walk over to the bar, the bartender smiles widely at me.

"What can I get you?" She asks, still eyeing Dean.

"Scotch straight," I reply as she goes to pour the drink.

"So you, and that hottie over there..."

"Just work friends," I answer knowing she wants to know if he's single.

"Well I figured that much, didn't take you for his type."

And here we go, I think taking the glass she set in front of me.

"I'm assuming you didn't start this conversation to insult me so what do you want to know." I snap

"Just wanted to be sure he wasn't a chubby chaser," She smirks.

I roll my eyes heading back to the table. Sam looks at me with a sad look. I fake a smile as Dean walks to the bar.

"What did she say?" Sam asks taking a drink of his beer. "And don't say nothing you hadn't heard."

"Why are you suddenly so interested in the insults I get? You never cared before." I reply maybe a bit harshly, to be honest.

"What do you mean by before? Does this happen a lot to you?" Sam asks his usual concerned look on his face.

"All the time." I brush him off "Like I said, I don't want to talk about it."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"What good would it do?" I don't give him a chance to respond before I inform "I'm going back to the motel."

I hear Sam call my name but I don't turn around. I need to get out of this bar, my self-esteem cannot take another blow like that at least not right now. I take the fifteen-minute walk back to the motel trying not to let my brain take over. I don't want to cry right now. I shut the door and strip not caring about leaving my clothes strewn around the room. I stand before the mirror in the bathroom. I try to avoid the mirror while I'm naked. I don't like looking at myself. I frown looking at the stretch marks that stretch across my hips. The way my stomach puffs out where it's supposed to be flat. How wide my hips are. The way my boobs sag and aren't perky like the bartenders. I just wish I looked like her, then maybe Dean would want me. Maybe he'd see me as more than a friend. Who am I kidding? He'd never want me.

"I wouldn't say never." A familiar voice breaks my train of thought. I jump turning to the doorway to see Lucifer stood there.

"Lucifer!" I scold quickly grabbing something to cover up with. The fallen angel and I grew close when he stayed in the bunker wearing Cas. He's the only one who knows how I feel about going out with Sam and Dean. He knows about my feelings for the hunter.

"I heard your distress." He explains entering the bathroom. "You've been upset all night." He stands behind me ice blue eyes boring into mine.

I can tell he's trying to make me let my guard down. He promised to never read my mind unless I allowed him. He was oddly respectful of the devil, something I admire in him. He's so powerful yet with me he's so gentle. I've never seen him so soft with anyone else. He told me once that I make him feel safe as if he doesn't need this guard up.

"Just a hunt that went unplanned." I sigh trying to brush off the matter but he knows me better than that.

"Come on Little one. I know you better than that." He rests his head on my shoulder a way to tell me that he's here and will listen to whatever I have to say. We both know I'll cave and tell him everything, I always do. He's patient gives me time to think, not pushing me to talk about it. I know he'd accept me if I didn't want to talk about it. But he also knew that I couldn't keep it in. I needed to talk about it with someone and I trust Lucifer more than I trust the brothers. Something I never thought I'd say but here we are.

"Let me get changed, you go get some chocolate and we'll talk," I reply giving him a fake smile and just like that he's gone.

I change quickly throwing on my favorite sweats that are probably way too big for me but so comfortable and an oversized t-shirt that has stains on it. I never felt the need to dress up for Lucifer. He always accepted me just as I am. He's seen me at my worst. Completely Smashed, sobbing historically and even high out of my mind. Whenever I need him, he's there.

He appears just as I finish pulling the shirt down. In his hands he holds whiskey, my favorite chocolate and a pizza. He knows exactly what I need even if I don't tell him. He sits beside me on the bed, one leg pressed against mine. He hands me the bottle.

"The hunt went sideways, not in an everyone got hurt way." I explain pausing to take a drink from the bottle "There was this nest of vampires turning girls at some club, so naturally we needed bait to draw him out. I told...I told them it wouldn't work that I'm too fat for his liking based on the other victims but no one listened. I um, I just went along with it and well he turned me down of course. Rather harshly but it's whatever. Nothing I hadn't heard before."

"What'd he say?" he asks voice soft.

"Oh you know the usual, something along the lines of he wouldn't go for me if I was the last woman of the earth. how embarrassed he is that I'd even think he'd consider fucking me."

He takes an annoyed breath in as I continue "I'll admit that one stung but, the real reason I feel like shit is because of-"

"Dean." He finishes for me

I nod "Typical night. He hit on the bartender which wasn't a big deal, I'm use to that. I went to get a drink and she said something."

"Where's the bar?"

"Lucifer." I start turning to face him, rage in his eyes

"No, tell me Y/N."

"Luc it's fine. No big deal."

"It is to me. You're hurt," he replies eyes soften as he notices a single tear roll down my face.

"I'll be okay, just a dent in my self-image is all."

He pops up sitting in front of me, a serious expression on his face "You shouldn't have any dents in your self-image. You're beautiful."

I scoff "I'm fat."

"What does that have to do with your beauty?"

"You just don't get it Luc."

"Then explain it to me."

"Humans don't see souls like you guys, they see the outside first and judge on it. I'm not every guy's cup of tea which is fine. I just wish people wouldn't look at me wonder what guys like Sam and Dean are doing with a girl like me."

"I wonder the same thing." I wince slightly as he finishes the sentence "Not because you aren't good enough for them but because they aren't worth enough to be in your presence."

"Now I know you're lying."

"I would never lie to you little one," he says lifting his hand to cup my jaw. I find comfort in his cool touch as I lean into his hand.

"You deserve so much more than those flannel wrapped nightmares."

"Those are my friends Luc," I warn

"Yet, here you are. Upset and alone."

"Sam did try to get me to talk about it but I pushed him away."

"Why push a so-called friend away?"

I hesitate to try to find the right answer. Why did I not let my guard down with Sam like I do with Lucifer? Why is it so easy to drop my guard around him? Maybe it's because he's always there. He always knows exactly what I need to feel better. I find solace in his company, never needing to fake anything. I've never let anyone in like I have Lucifer. Never been so vulnerable around anyone. Here I sit, wallowing in self-pity broken up over a guy who isn't even remotely interested in me and here's Lucifer picking up the pieces like he always does. He's here to mend the broken parts despite probably having something better to do, I didn't even call him. He just shows up when I need him. He says he can feel my emotions at first he expressed a distaste for them but something change with him. I look into these blue eyes and realize, I open up to Lucifer more than anyone else because I love him. The realization hitting me like a truck. I'd been pinning after Dean all the while ignoring the feelings I have for the amazing angle before me.

His expression falters, a confused look on his face. Did he hear that?

"I did, I'm sorry little one. I know I promised to never read your thoughts but you seemed so lost in them." he brushes his thumb across my jaw.

"I'm-

"Do you want to know why I feel your emotions?" Lucifer cuts me off

I nod as he withdraws his hand, I already miss his touch.

"I've wanted to tell you this for a long time but I didn't know how...My father creates soul mates for all the angles. I didn't think he made me one because I'd never met them until I met you. That's why I can feel your emotions, I'm connected to you."

"Am I not connected to you?"

"Not yet, to make us true mates there a ritual we have to follow."

"What kind of ritual?"

"Don't worry about that right now little one. I just want you to know I love you too."

"Lucifer?" I ask

he hums an answer

"Make me yours."

[elizacornwall]

Vengeance is an Idiot's Game - Chapter 24 - After Effects

Read all the published chapters here. -------------------------------------------------- Her head was pounding something fierce. Waking up later than usual, the sun was glaring into Eliza’s face and all she wanted to do was to cover herself with her blanket, disappearing from life. She felt sick and hungry at the same time, not sure which feeling should take priority. Turning away from the painful blazing ball in the sky, she pulled the blanket over her head, not ready to face the day yet. How much did she drink last night? She had a couple beers before the dance, then there was whiskey at the campfire… The dance. She could feel her face flush red as the memory came back. Dutch’s initial invitation and then Sadie, practically throwing her into Arthur’s arms. Sure, Sadie had done it in a very elegant way, an elegance she wouldn’t have attributed the woman before, yet she still… What, passed her on? Set her up? For the last ten years of her life, this was what she had tried to escape. Her father wanting to fix her up with some man of his choosing, and now Sadie Adler was playing matchmaker too? It was infuriating, humiliating. Knowing what she did about Eliza’s feelings towards her father, how could she have done this to her? Yet… Dancing with Arthur had certainly been preferable to dancing with Dutch. Maybe she had just wanted to spare her from Molly’s anger… She had admitted to Sadie that all she’d gotten from the pretty redhead was angry glances and cold silence whenever she had tried to talk to her. The pounding in her temples intensified and she decided not to think about this conflict in her mind anymore for the time being. It was bad enough to wake up as if she had been rolled over by a stagecoach, she didn’t need to ponder over whether she’d been thrown in front of it by someone she trusted too. Bottom line was, she had liked dancing with Morgan and thinking back to the way he’d gently held her waist… Her stomach lurched as the strange sensation bubbled up again, and she could just about throw off her cover and stumble around Sadie’s wagon before she involuntarily emptied the contents of her gut onto the ground behind it. She felt dizzy and the whole world was still spinning. Keeping herself upright by desperately clutching onto the wagon next to her, she managed to shuffle back to her cot. The sunlight still hurt her eyes, and she groaned loudly as she let herself fall on the edge, annoyed to have let it get that far.

“Welcome back to the livin’, little Miss Sunshine”, Sadie’s hoarse voice sounded from her right, the grin on her lips audible without needing to see her face. “You sleep well?” The blonde woman was leaning against the wagon, taking in her undoubtedly pitiful appearance. Eliza was even wearing the same clothes as last night, boots included. Her answer only consisted in another pained groan and she buried her head in her palms, elbows resting on the knees. She was not ready to welcome the world right now. She ignored the approaching footsteps, wishing everyone would just go away. “You’re awake! Here, I got some yarrow off Charles, I’mma make you some tea with it. Should help with your head.” With great effort she lifted her head, squinting up at Morgan who was holding out a bunch of pretty red flowers in front of her face. She couldn’t help but cock one eyebrow, smiling slyly. “I thought you’re supposed to bring the lady flowers before you ask her to dance.” The range of expressions on his face was all worth it, surprise at her quick thinking quickly transforming into a bashful glance, then there was a trace of embarrassment and finally concluding in an eye roll of annoyance. She stifled a laugh. “I ain’t asked you to dance”, he just muttered, but the colour in his cheeks betrayed his overly blasé tone. “If you’re well enough to go spewing sarcasm I wonder if ya need this tea at all.” So, he was shy too, as well as a gentleman. How in the world was he a murdering, thieving outlaw again…? Eliza laughed, wincing as it sent a fresh jolt of throbbing pain through her head. “Thank you, and my apologies. Some tea would be lovely”, she answered, eyes closed and rubbing her fingers against her temples in a fruitless attempt to ease the headache. He returned a few minutes later, passing her a cup with steaming water. The flowers were now submerged at the bottom, releasing a touch of orange colour and a strange, astringent smell. Morgan sat down on the little stool, Sadie had taken up the space next to her on the cot. Eliza bowed her head, stretching her neck out slowly. “Thanks guys. You can head off and do whatever, I’ll be fine. There’s no use in sitting here mothering me”, she murmured, half irritated and half ashamed by their overprotective manner towards her self-inflicted misery. Sadie chuckled. “We ain’t goin’ anywhere, might not look like I’m dyin’ like you do, but I ain’t feelin’ like a spring chicken either.” Arthur hummed in agreement. “Where’s your flower soup then?” Eliza replied in slight jest, lifting the cup to her lips. It was still too hot to drink, so she blew on the surface. She tried a careful sip to taste, but ended up singing the tip of her tongue anyway. What was a little extra discomfort in her current state. It was bitter, with a hint of a heavy sweetness in it and she pulled her face into a grimace. “Couldn’t you get some nicer tasting flowers?” “Hmm, might have, but they wouldn’t help ya with the headache, Miss.” Grumbling, she shot Arthur a dark look. Tea against headache, she didn’t quite believe in it, but there would hardly be any Laudanum to be found in an outlaw camp who’s only drug addict recently decided to come clean. Curse the Reverend and his righteous virtues. Morgan was observing her, a measuring look in his eyes. “When’s the last time you’ve eaten?” His question caught her off guard, she couldn’t remember being put on the spot like that. She could feel him exchanging a glance over her head with Sadie. “Err, yesterday morning, I think? I was out on my walk for the rest of the day, didn’t think to take anything with me.” Sadie gave her a little clap on the head which immediately flared up in a new wave of pulsating pain. “Ow, Sadie! What was that for?!” “No wonder you’re feelin’ so darned lousy girl! You’re s’posed to eat before you’re downing beers an’ whiskey like ya did!” Sadie’s volume exceeded her temporarily very low noise tolerance and she shrugged her head between the shoulders like a tortoise. The blonde woman tutted but Arthur was already on it, picking some

food from the kitchen wagon, ignoring the complaining Pearson. Eliza would have to bring him an extra fat kill soon to thank him. Her stomach didn’t feel as bad as it had done earlier, but the thought of food made her a bit queasy. Nibbling at the oat cake he passed her, she tried to think of an excuse for them to leave her company, she didn’t fancy being babysitted too much. Arthur spoke up, pulling her out of her thoughts. “How much do you remember? You wasn’t shy drinking down that whiskey at the fire.” She could see him looking at her out of the corner of her eyes and avoided his gaze, concentrating intensely on the cookie in her hand. “A fair bit I think. Everything up to the campfire, the songs there and… didn’t you pull me away? Because of something the boys said?” Frowning, she tried to recall the events of last night at the fire. There was a bit of flirting, an argument, then Arthur and her sat at the cliff. “Oh. I got angry at you. I’m sorry”, she murmured, still not looking at the man. “’t’s alright, you was drunk. I been yelled at before, don’t bother me much no more”, he laughed, making her feel a bit better. “You weren’t entirely wrong either I suppose. I ain’t the best explaining myself, don't think I worded things the right way.” She stole a shy look at him through the strands of her hair that had fallen out of the plait in the night. He smiled a warm smile, but his eyes had a sadness in them. Clearly he wasn’t happy about his inability to express himself. He didn’t strike Eliza as someone who couldn’t put things into words however, even if he was a bit blunt at times. She had always liked blunt honesty better than sweet lies. “I also remember you showing me the north star”, she said gently in an effort to make him feel better. It worked, a little at least, and his smile widened. “Yeah? We gotta be careful what we’re getting’ up to, you seem to remember an awful lot for having been in such a state last night”, he chuckled. “At least you won’t be gettin’ lost anytime soon.” Sadie gave a hearty kackle when a loud voice sounded from halfway across the camp. It was the Irish lad that had come home last night, Sean. “And t‘ere she is, the famous lady Cornwall! Fallen out ‘er pop’s hands into ours!” He approached with wide steps, coming to a standstill in front of her and taking her hand into his with a bow, planting a kiss on the back of it. “Name’s Sean MacGuire mylady, pleasure ta make your acquaintance!” Learned politeness made her smile and nod as she stared up at him. The volume he spoke in hurt her head and he was no less energetic now than last night when he had been drunk. She ignored her inner groan and stood up, giving him a little curtsy to play along with his overly flamboyant introduction. “Please, call me Eliza. I’m not overly fond of my father’s name I’m afraid. How do you do?” She put on her thickest English accent and had to swallow her giggle at the look on the faces of Sadie and Arthur. Now that was entertainment. “An’ you’re from the island! Ain’t she a wonderful sight. Never seen a fairer lass in all of the old kingdom If ye allow me to be so blunt.” He grinned at her, quite handsomely she had to admit to herself, with his boyish charisma. She faked a high pitched titter and held her hand in front of her face as if to hide a flattered blush. “She’s a right catch, ain’t she! Don’t you go and fish in the wrong pond now boy.” Karen had appeared in her night gown still, even though the sun was way past it’s highest point now. Her voice was light and playful but had a warning tone to it which Sean too seemed to notice as he stepped back quickly, letting go of Eliza’s hand. The blonde girl flung her arm around his shoulders, and he held her waist. “Don’t you go get a crush on the bastard here, he’s broken many hearts and none of ‘em deserved it. Well, maybe some did”, Karen mused, “but you wouldn’t. He likes putting on his charm with beautiful women.” She still sounded light hearted, but her body language was stiff and almost possessive, gripping Sean’s shoulder tightly. Eliza

let her lips curl into a slanted smile and shook her head. “Don’t worry, my mother taught me not to trust Irishmen, no matter how charming”, she replied, hearing Sadie give a chuckle in the background. Sean was appalled, but he didn’t speak. “Besides, I wouldn’t dare cross you, you can be well scary did you know?” Karen gave a barking laugh and seemed to ease up a bit. Sean gave her an uncertain smile, visibly relieved. “I just had to welcome our newest member, always good to ‘ave some new blood on board ain’t it! No big deal”, he justified, a bit too quick for it to be natural. Karen steered him around, pulling him away. “Well you met her now, let’s go before Sadie knocks you out again. She ain’t looking too happy and I can’t blame her, you bein’ such a loudmouth all the time. Sorry ya had to deal with him”, she added, directed towards them, “He just gets excited every time he sees a new pair of knockers. We’ll leave ya in peace now.” And with that he was pushed towards the girls’ tents. Eliza let herself fall back down onto the cot with a sigh. “How do you do, ey?”, Sadie mocked. “I see we’ve got to work on your language yet!” “You’ve got something against my accent? At least one of us can speak English properly!” Eliza replied, laughing. Sadie jostled her elbow into her ribs. “You mean fancy speech, with lots’a words and no meaning behind ‘em. Don’t seem so proper to me, don’t you agree Arthur?” The man had sat there in silence for a few minutes now, quietly watching the exchange with Sean and Karen unfold. He hummed. “I don’t mind it, think it sounds quite nice.” Sadie threw the butt of her cigarette at him in protest. Eliza just laughed as they squabbled and sipped the rest of her yarrow tea. It made her face scrunch up in distaste, but if Charles reckoned this helped with headache it was worth a try, he had yet to let her down with his knowledge of the nature all around them. She might ask him to accompany her on another hunt if he could spare the time, would be good to feel useful once more. One day she would have to find her own way of making money for the camp, doing daily chores wasn’t exactly her idea of an exciting life running with an outlaw gang. If she asked nicely, he might show her how to hunt bison, one of those beasts would feed the entire gang for a week! Sadie’s loud exclamation snapped her back into reality. “How dare you Morgan! I ain’t never been unfaithful to my Jakey. Not in life and not in death!” She crossed her arms and puffed up her cheeks. Eliza set her empty cup on the dirt before her and looked anxiously from one to the other, trying to figure out why on earth Arthur would make such an insulting suggestion. It wasn’t long before Sadie’s lips twitched however and betrayed her act. Arthur just sat there, eyebrows raised expectantly, giving her a quick look and eyeroll that made her chuckle. “You’ll have to forgive her behaviour, she’s a bit of an actress, our Miss Adler. Don’t like to make it easy for anyone to understand her.” He stretched indulgently and groaned, getting to his feet. “I better get on some task or other, Dutch’s gonna chew me out if I don’t do anythin’ useful today.” Sadie gave up her play at this, her face suddenly fierce with excitement. “Got anything in mind, cowboy?” “Nah, Hosea mentioned he might have a lead on somethin’. Figured I’d check up with him. You stay here and sleep off yer bottle ache.” He collected his hat and made to leave, when he seemed to think of something and stopped, turning to look at the younger woman. “Hosea also said something ‘bout it possibly involving you, I’ll see what he has to say and let ya know when we got a plan, alright?” Her heartbeat quickened at the prospect of a job. She swallowed and nodded, suddenly half excited and half terrified. He let his eyes linger on her for a moment before he set off towards the horses, where Hosea was brushing his Silver Dollar. Sadie cleared her throat and got to her feet as well. “Imma go try and sleep off this nasty day, you should do the same. Little doe like you needs all her

strength for a job!” The blonde grinned at her, but Eliza thought it looked rather kind. Her idea of some more sleep sounded like exactly the thing she felt up to right now.

[quietlydiabolic]

“Precipitation” - BassRock short oneshot fanfic

By: Jixie Fandom: Mega Man Classic @bassrockweek​ : May 16 - Rain Rating: G Word Count: 1780

i.

Slow and steady, each fat raindrop splattered against his armor like a single punctuation mark.

The storm had come on suddenly. It'd been a perfectly clear day— at least, it was when he'd reached Wily's fortress hours before. Normally he hated to leave once he was in. It wasn't like he could teleport back to where he had left off, and the longer he was away, the more annoying minions would find their way into the zones he'd already cleared.

But Mega Man was happy to make an exception for this.

"I don't understand," he said, casting a wary look at Duo.

The towering alien robot didn't so much as glance his way. Instead, he knelt besides Bass, his attention focused on the damaged Wily 'bot.

"I mean, he can teleport within the Skull Fortress, and we were already there, and Wily's in there somewhere, too…"

"Navigation system is shot," Duo said. If the coordinates or passkey were wrong, the forcefield would have kicked Bass right outside the barrier. His expression was stern, but there was an underlying thread of regret. "You are correct, he is infected."

"So, what do we do?"

His massive left hand curled into a fist, and Duo drew back his arm. "Prevent it from spreading."

"Wait!" Without thinking, Mega Man threw himself between Duo and Bass. "Wait! You— you can't!"

Sagging, Duo shook his head. "It's not that I want to. This is what must be done. There is more at stake than any one of us—"

"Please. There's got to be some other way of clearing out the evil energy without… destroying its host."

For a moment the two stared each other down, silent but for the persistent rainfall, until Bass started twitching and groaning.

"Please," Mega Man repeated.

Duo frowned.

"If what you said is true, he is a villain who willingly used evil energy in order to attack you. There is no reason to—"

"You just have to trust me, Duo. Please, I— I know… I mean, I don't know how I know, but I know that he can change—"

With a sigh, he relented, holding up his hand in a ‘stop' gesture. Then, reaching out, he took hold of Mega Man's arm and guided him out of the way. Opening a small panel in his gauntlet, he drew out a coaxial cable, and after a brief search opened Bass' access panel. Duo set up a one-to-one network connection, quietly commented that his kind could do this wirelessly, and set to work.

Mega Man watched, alternating between weaving his fingers together and rubbing his wrists. He tried not to start pacing, and tried harder not to worry, and especially tried not to think about how droplets of water had beaded up on Bass' armor, midnight black and glistening in the rain.

After a few minutes Duo finished and disconnected.

"An evil energy infection can never be fully erased. It will be up to him to continue fighting it." He gave Mega Man a curious look. "You love him."

"Wh-what? No. I mean… y-e— maybe? I— He pretended to be my friend, but…" Face flushed, he lowered his head. "I don't know. I felt a… I felt something. It could become that, some day, I guess…"

With a dismissive grunt, Duo got to his feet. Then, after a moment of hesitation, placed his massive left hand on Mega Man's head, his touch one of solidarity. "I've been there before, and I do not envy you. But I hope you are correct."

ii.

The rain came down in a heavy downpour, an endless barrage of sharp, stinging raindrops.

It had been a few weeks, but Mega Man was still exhausted from his last conflict with Dr. Wily. It wasn't a physical exhaustion, of course, but an emotional one.

"Yo."

"Uagh!" Startled, Mega Man started pinwheeling his arms in an effort to keep from falling.

Standing by a scenic cliffside to contemplate life was Proto Man's shtick, and honestly, he should have left it to his brother. Sure, the valley below was stunningly beautiful, even in the rain. But Bass had just appeared out of nowhere, possibly— likely— to fight him, and would've won without firing off a single shot because Mega Man nearly fell off the edge of a cliff.

Bass grabbed Mega Man's arm to steady him, then jerked him back away from the edge. "Idiot."

"If you're here for a fight, you're a little late."

"Tsk. What, for Wily? We're on the outs right now."

"Oh."

Crossing his arms, Bass glanced over at the valley. "Nice, but it's better when it's not raining. You picked a lousy day."

There was an uneasy silence.

"How'd you know to find me here?"

"I wasn't looking for you, stupid. You're not the only one your obnoxious brother drags out into the middle of nowhere to ‘meditate' or whatever the heck he calls it."

"Oh. Right." Then he started putting two and two together. "…You're out here because— it's because of Wily, isn't it?"

Bass made a sound of disgust.

Then sat down, letting his legs hang off the cliff. "That scumbag tried to reprogram me."

"…Oh."

"Do you say anything else?"

"Of course I do, I just, um… I don't want to say the wrong thing."

Mega Man sat down next to him— but not too close.

"I want to say it didn't take, but actually? Wily didn't like the changes. So, I guess the good thing is he won't try that crap again."

"Sorry."

Leaning back on his palms, Bass kicked idly. "Yeah, well." 

They drifted into silence, and Mega Man took a chance. A stupid chance, perhaps, but he wasn't sure when he'd get another shot. Shifting his weight and trying to look as casual as possible, he slid his hand over until his pinky brushed up against Bass' hand.

Nothing happened. There was no protest, but also no sign of approval. Bass seemed to ignore the gesture, which really was probably the best he could hope for.

But a few moments later, without comment or fanfare, Bass placed his hand over Mega Man's.

iii.

It had been drizzling on and off all morning, leaving the air thick and hazy. The sun was out and it was humid, but still cool enough that it wasn't oppressive, just…

…soft. A dreamy mist that blanketed everything.

Rock actually hadn't expected any of this, but Blues had strolled into the lab, slyly hinting that he should head out to the ruins of the Gear Fortress. Then, when he had shifted in preparation to armor up, Blues had cut him off. ‘No, go like you are now.'

As soon as he arrived it became obvious why. Rock could count on one hand the times he'd seen Bass dressed casually. It was hard enough for the Wily ‘bot to let his guard down and go anywhere without armor. That went double for anytime Rock was around. Blues'd had much more luck there, and Rock would've been lying to himself if he said he wasn't a little bit envious.

He'd been out here for a while, judging by how damp his shirt was. Dark hair slicked back in contrast to Rock's perpetual messy helmet hair, or Blues' meticulously coiffed pompadour. The purple warpaint on his face trailed down his neck and arms, which Rock had seen before, but generally pushed out of his mind because otherwise he couldn't help but wonder just how far… well…

“What do you want?" Bass asked, irate.

"Nothing. Blues said you were here, so I came—"

"To hang out? Have some tea, share the latest gossip? I'm not your friend, numbskull, and I don't need you hanging around."

Rock wilted slightly, gripping his arm anxiously, but didn't let Bass drive him away. "Could've used your help with this last round," he said, kicking at a hunk of concrete.

"Yeah, well. When Wily wouldn't give me that stupid double-gear— whatever. I just didn't feel like getting involved one way or another."

For a few moments neither said anything.

"You know, with Dr. Wily in jail," Rock started, "you… I… you don’t… what I mean is…"

"He'll bust out sooner or later. It's only a matter of time and you know it."

"Yeah but you don't have to—"

Bass scowled.

"Let me stop you right there. Proto Dweeb is always trying to pressure me with that crap, too. I've told him over and over, I'm not ditching Wily. I mean, I ditch him all the time, but— not, like… forever." He leaned forward to grab a piece of the rubble, and then flung it, watching as it shattered against a partially collapsed wall. "He built me. He may be a jerkwad, but he's still my dad."

Shifting, Rock looked away, then back up. "You deserve better."

That went ignored. "The stupid part is, he'll never be happy no matter what I do. The only thing he wants is for me to destroy you. I want— I'm going to beat you, just y’know, to prove I can. But I'm not going to… I wouldn’t… anyway, Wily doesn't care if I'm the strongest or the best or anything. He just cares if you're dead or not. And I'm stuck. Just— stuck."

"If there's anything—" he paused, then changed his mind. "I'm sorry." Rock found himself focusing less on what Bass said, and more on the things that had gone unsaid. Hesitant, he asked, "Do you… do you like me?"

"No."

Rock's face fell. But then Bass grabbed him, tilting his head to the side, before leaning forward and kissing him. His actions were aggressive but clumsy, the stolen kiss uncertain, almost timid. The whole thing was pretty awkward, but Rock was stunned anyway. He drew back in surprise, fingers brushing against his lips.

"That was stupid. Crap! That was really, unbelievably stupid." Stepping back, Bass ran his hands through his hair and tried to gather his wits. "Ugggghhh, that was a mistake."

Only there was no taking it back now. Rock, not sure how to convince him it wasn't, did the first thing that came to mind: he threw his arms around Bass' neck, planting a quick, chaste kiss on his cheek, then another on his nose, and a third on his chin, before going in for a decidedly less chaste kiss on the lips. Rock's attempt was every bit as fumbling and inept as Bass' had been.

…but it worked. Bass' look of distress and confusion changed to one of relief.

"This is a disaster! What're we going to do?"

With a giddy laugh, Rock shook his head. "No idea. But we'll figure it out."

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

Jeremiah: how'd you know that was your granny?

Me; i remember her voice. Jeremiah don't cry

Jeremiah: that's so fucked up how do you say that to someone?

Well... I remember her voice and im sure God made sure that memory was open for me. She got a real rugged voice like her life, I knew it when she said I had to apologize. Its a voice that carries all this pain from all these years. Remember she was real old and wrinkled like crispy crispy fried chicken. And her little old eyes... They were always sad and mad and all mean no nonsense and she couldn't ever hear and i hated yelling at her so she could hear so she had me write it down for her.

But her voice is like her face when she was alive, deep from the heart carrying what the heart feels, that's how. Just carrying all her life dignity and harsh life experiences.

So a little story about my mom and my granny. Denise used to live with my granny in one of them silver bullet type campers but it was real spacious. She used to live there with granny to keep her ass from jail. Granny was the only one that could ring her up by her neck like a chicken and beat that ass.

One time we went to visit in about 1985 and Denise went in there and stabbed her with an ink pen right in the foot. I remember that iodine they used to clean and heal it up with all on her skin. And the bandages.

Denise did it right in front of me cause i went out there and Denise was taking off ber top all "my granny gonna give me a bath" and my granny looked scared.

Mind you id already drank bleach watched my twin brother murdered in front of me abd bypassed death multiple times So i knew by looking in grannys blue eyes she wasn't about to give no one a bath.

So i looked all in the small trailer and told her "there aint no place to take a bath. There aint no tub. What in the sink? You're way too fat to"

"Well fine I'll wash the dishes" took a pan and knocked my granny out cold! I ran to get my dad and I felt i didn't run fast enough by the time i got back my mom was all trying sex shit on my granny who was knocked out. So i went outside and screamed on the top of ny lungs and everyone came running then.

They dumped granny in an old wash tub in the yard. Old silver one y'all rich people use to feed your calves and horses in. And woke her up and i was all satisfied cause I got to wondering "where does she bathe?" Well in the big house of course but they only had a shower there. So i was all "now that's a bath" the rest of the summer i used it for my bathing tub and my swimming pool and we made a mud pit to wrestle my cousin in. Girls against girls and boys against boys my granny said. Till i won all the girls at least twice then she said i could wrestle the boys. With my clothes on of course. Kyle was the only one that could beat me of my cousins. Now he is gangsta thug through and through. Big as Hell and i know I'd be a dumb bitch to start with him but he ain't nothing but a big ole teddy bear to most. Still would not cross him a bit. I beat a few of my uncles, too. But to be fair i was pretty wiggly and we were in some real wet slick mud from my tub overflow and swimming with the girl cousins and the boys splashing during their turn. And a bit of sprinkle instigation from my granny spraying us down to call quits and to hose those beat down so they could go play safe.

So that night i was hiding in my moms old bed with granny in her little house and my uncle all dumb came with my mom, not knowing what was to happen. Well my mom told little old Shane to beat it and my mom was all trying her Sins again and she kept wiggling at the curtain and all so I crept up to the corner and peeked around and Denise said "why is she in here?"

Granny said "well you didn't even know she was missing"

And so Denise punched her right in the eye! So i jumped up and knocked down the blue and green and yellow paisley curtain to separate the bed space, thankfully I jumped and it didn't heat me full on the head and i started screaming full on hoping my uncle was close enough to hear.

He was But he ran in the big house to get my dad and his dad and anyone else.

I was standing on the curtain when Denise stabbed my granny with the blue note pen we were using to talk with. And stabbed my granny right in the ankle space above her foot and under the calf.

Then she came for me so i ducked in that small 5 feet of space that the kitchen covered, yanked that pen out my granny and went towards my mom and she ran for the door, the fat coward. So I stabbed her right in the left shoulder blade like a boss bitch. I was 4 years old.

"Well you little" she spat as she turned with eyes only the Devil himself would be fond of. I was fucking exhausted fighting all day and being in the mud and all and i had been sleeping so i got pissed. I wouldn't done that shit she stayed in the big house like she was supposed to.

So i took that pan granny put in the drawer, a good 9 inch iron skillet only God could made and I started beating the shit outta her. Right on the left side of the face first then she fell all fake and i kept beating her then she started biting my granny!!! Right about then the door flew open and my little uncle that had just been out was there and he said "they're coming" i saw relief on my granny i was all "no i got this, shut the door I don't need the whole house seeing this"

But i seen a pair of old man grandpa hands that been working the prison for 40 years reach in and grab those fat ankles and pull her out and im yelling and beating her the whole time. "Hey! What the Hell are you doing?! I ain't finished! Shit and Fuck! Get back here you dumb bitch ---"

And i looked up in the dark and saw nothing but my grandpa's bright blue eyes twinkling in the low kitchen light "Well finish"

"I... Uh.. Let me get the pan!" I was plum confused "are you sure? I can for sure kill her"

"As you wish" and he gestured toward my mother's body. She was wrestling to wake up and grandpa put his bare foot brave to walk in the desert valley of Arizona square on her back and i told him hold on to the door so he didnt fall and i went wailing on her till my dad came and i looked at my dad with that iron pan in both my hands held low at my hips "but I'm not finished"

Oh grandpa just started laughing so hard he could barely stand i was glad he held that door cause for sure he would fallen. And grandpa said "ah just let her"

"Alright!!!" I started to begin wailing again "oh can i dad?" I was a perfect child, always getting permission from adults to murder. Still do. Still do. Except for here and there in My teenage years. "Oh and someone got to take care of her!" Cause my dad and grandpa were wondering if i was finished cause i was covered in blood. And granny was yelling "no its me! Let her finish!"

So my dad went in and left to get some bandages from the house. Cause she was squirting blood all over. And dripping and her tea towel (hand towel) was soaked nearly full of blood except the corners.

Granny hollering "I'll be fine! Let her finish!"

Y'all see me in this old lady? Genetics baby, i got the good ones.

So i started wailing harder than ever on that old beast. Im only four and that iron skillet was heavy and i been done using my muscles for the day already. But i got fueled for seeing that blood and i kept on the back of her neck till grandpa said "woah what's that pen doing out her back? Did you do your granny too?"

My mouth dropped open "no sir"

"Alright then finish" just like a prison guard he told me.

"Well yes sir where shall i hit?" My granny had been teaching me old fancy words and styles of speaking from "the old South" all day. Kinda testing me. She would say a sentence like "shall I order some tea?" And I had to guess what she asked "oh can you" and I would write "can" and she would say what kinda can? She would show me green bean can and i would shake my head no.

"Well you can hit her in the legs so she can't walk and do this no more"

So i hit her square on her lower ass "the top of the legs! The middle! The ankle, the calve!" I went up and down shouting anatomy I looked up at my granny and she looked tired with her head down so i yelled "oh fuck! Is she alright?!? Dad is my granny--?" And she waved her hand at me my dad was looking up at me, his eyes full of pain, sadness and glistening with humor and admiration. My mouth fell over "are you" and i stumbled towards him and granny waved me off again and i seen she was laughing and she sat up heehawwing all kinds! Then put her head down. Grandpa was shaking the whole door with his laughing nearly shaking it plumb off i was afraid. "Now what were you doing when i was shouting anatomy? Your face was different" i hit that ink pen in further about all i could muscle up seeing everyone was alright.

"Anatomy? Billy where she learned this shit from? I know shall and sir was from her but anatomy?! What? Go on you can hit again"

"Oh Idk i guess Denise"

"Yeah that bitch be hitting me if i don't help her study right. Don't you?" I grabbed her by the back of her bloody head and looked in her face and dropped both her and the pan "oh my God, that's gross. She about to stink"

She was dead.

"Now we gotta do CPR" said my tired dad

"Now you hold on! Now this is MY house! Sabrina you do the CPR" i helped him flip the bitch over "now Billy you stay right there. Sabrina now you jump on her chest! Get to starting!"

"But i don't wanna!!!!"

"Now come on I'll help you. Well hold hands, you know how to take a life dont you? Now you gotta earn your path and make sure you know how to restart one too! Now come on! Don't run!"

Dam I tried not to learn that lesson and dam if it hadn't stuck with me all these years. 4 year old kid me learned some real stuff back then in 1985 but here in 2019 i learned the rest of my path. Sometimes it's alright to let me finish and run off. Now me and Jesse are in a fight because he disagreed with me, i got real mad and some new friends questioned my judgement. But they understood after a nap. And i still ain't friends with Jesse now. Cause it ain't about death with him its the fact he still wants kr to suffer. So I'm glad my granny is back Because she aint that way. My grandpa is here, too And he sure is sorry. He died of cancer. My Granny just cause she was old lonely and had a broken heart. And Jesse better watch the fuck out cause hes the liar, not me. He got me mad. Done sent two people to kill me in Santa Fe and some bitch tonight all talking about hiding on my porch with a gun. I told his bitch ass he better be in a bullet proof vest cause ima shoot his face with it. He got scared m i told him he better start running and jesse was all she's too fat to chase you!! For real. My legs work. Today in 2019.

So now i listened cause my dad yelled but my granny said "let her run!"

But I listened cause my dad always protected me so if it was me I'd want CPR probably

And we had a discussion about it. And grandpa said "you want me and your dad to do it or you want me and you?!"

"Me and you, i guess. If someone's gotta do it better be Me, sir i got it" i grudgingly climbed on my moms fat where my grandpa gave me a tight hug and made my sadness disappate.

I tried to run again "now come here!"

"Awh! I thought I'd get a hug and that would be the end!"

"Is that what your mother do to you?"

I started all crying trying to explain.

"Never Mind ill call the ambulance"

My dad did and my dad said not to jump and put my feet where they should go and i just moved up and down real soft a bit once the ambulance lights turned the corner.

Grandpa said to take granny first although she was hurt a bit and said Denise was going to through coroner and the EMT argued "we are here to save a life"

"Then save her!" He pointed at me, "SHE did this Cause her momma, this one" he pointed at the ground "has been attacking dear old granny all day! Now call the coroner! I would say im sorry! But im not! Now call it up use the phone! Go on and do it!"

"Sir let me remind you you're not the sheriff!"

"then call him!!"

"Im glad I'm not in prison because now I can see why you work there youre scaryyyy"

"Did he make you do it?!?!"

"He stabbed my granny with a pen? No she did!!!!"

Granpa was all "whoa! Now she knows consequences of actions and you're standing here arguing and i got one bleeding to death, a little one all nervous and a dead body! Are you here to save a life or what not?!?!"

"Yes sir. Let me get in there to old granny but move her" finally he looked down "oh she's dead. Im sorry sir"

"Well i ain't!" My grandpa was loud granny laughed.

"Y'all are about as sick in the head as i ever seen" the EMT tried not to laugh

"Well you see a grown woman trying to rape your granny! That was her mom and she got her and i sure aint sorry it's about the 5th time today I had to get onto her about behaving!" Then grandpa's voice got quiet and gentler "now this one!" And he picked me up and carried me "now im going over to the tractor!!" And he put me up high on it and told me he was hiding me and I could run if i wanted, no one would ever catch me.

I didn't. And i was told to tell only what Denise had done to my granny. And i had won at muscle wrestling all day in the mud and i was in there sleep to protect my granny And i did. To the fullest extent of the law.

Unfortunately they sent the fat old bitch to the hospital and got her dumb ass back to life. Unfortunately I didn't beat it into her brains well enough... Cause now 34 years later.... Denise hasn't changed.

We should just put her in the field and ran her over with the tractor for the horses to eat and the dogs.

Its made me wiser to the world around me. Smarter than i can stand, until i want death myself because there's no end to misery.

But I've learned that i can't kill them all. So days that I get the good old dead back relieve a misery that i cannot stand that I see in so many people.

And those life lessons I learned all those years ago at the tender age of four have always stuck with me and have changed the world m from Iraq to Afghanistan to the good old USA. And they will continue to. And even in London.

And that's my promise given to me by the dead that they intend to keep.

So lately I've been thinking about Revelations in the bible. It keeps me happy to think one day (hopefully soon) all the evil will drop dead and all the good ghosts can once again have bodies they can keep. That keeps me healthy and "mentally sane" as they call it.

[sleepyfan-blog]

The Moonlight Carnival

anon request that tumblr munched.

fandom: none

warnings: references to gore, body horror, smoking, horror elements, circus, cursing

This was very different than other requests I’ve gotten, but a fun writing exercise. I really hope that you enjoy this, anon. 

“Maman!”  Lucette called out, a small pout on her face, waggling the end of the fat cigar that had smoldered out in the grey, foggy afternoon. The cold damp had soaked into everything - little droplets of water having condensed onto the thick goggles that the young zombie liked to wear on her head. Her black beret was similarly soaked and some of the frills on her long, black dress had flattened somewhat. Her long, dirty hair (long since stained by the gunpowder that she so loved to play with) clung together in clumps and patches, but none of this mattered to the little girl as she skipped over to her mother, gently tugging on the vampire’s dress “Maman, my cigar went out!”

Leonne smiled indulgently at her beloved daughter, gently reaching out and patting her, glad that the magical sigil continued to glow at least. It proved to her that this fog was not of a natural make, at least. She pulls the cigarette out of her mouth, blowing a bit of smoke out from between her lips as she does so as she lights her daughter’s cigar, and murmurs “Find Vivian and bring her into the main tent, alright? I need to talk with Zosme and Liam��� Oh, and do check to make sure that Miss Eloise will be coming for her shift - but that she will need to be on guard. I don’t like the look of this fog. It’s dreadfully suffocating.”  She twirled the end of her cigarette holder for emphasis, knowing with long practice how to spin it without causing the cigarette to go spinning out of the holder.

“Yes, maman!” Lucette responded, happily running off to go find her friend, finding her softly blue-glowing form as she drifted from one side of the encampment to the other “Vivian! Vivian, maman says that we have to stay inside.” She grinned widely at her dear magician friend, her crooked, yellow-stained teeth flashing a little in the dim, grey light, her milky-white eyes reflecting her surroundings.

“Hmmm…? Oh… Alright.” The young ghost nodded, drifted after her more lively friend, a small smile appearing on her face as the pair of them made their way into the spacious main tent.

Lucette wandered over to where her cannon was, gently patting it and humming softly, closing her eyes for a couple of moments as she recalled the the many time that she had flown through the air, rising high, high into the sky, her hair streaming behind her, her arms outstretched as she felt as if she could fly, before tumbling down, laughing and screaming with delight as she rocketed back down to earth, uncaring of the splattered mess that she’d make, content to wait until Maman and the others found the scattered pieces of her body. She heard a faint splash from the beautiful, glass tank that Zosme and Liam performed in - finding the way that they flew in the water to be pretty… But water put out her precious fire, and was therefore something that she didn’t like very much. She ran to the water’s edge and called out “Zosme! Zoooosmeee~! Maman really wants to talk to you, something about the fog being weird…”

The tall, slender selkie breached the surface of the water at the sound of the little girl’s voice, and sent her a small smile, a flash of needle-sharp teeth briefly seen before she spoke, her voice beautiful and lilting, as if Zosme were singing just a little (it was such a pretty sound, almost as lovely as the sounds that Lucette’s cannon made as it fired her into the sky! Or into the crowd, which was really funny, even if most of them really didn’t appreciate her guts getting blown across them) “Very well, does she want to talk to Liam as well?”

“Uh-huh! Where’s the cellphone that we use to talk to Eloise at? I don’t remember where Maman put it…” The little zombie asked, frowning for a moment before shrugging. If she needed to remember something, she would!

“It’s on the highest stand of the bleachers, near the lights, so that it can stay charged, little one. The two of us will go speak to the Ring mistress about this supposedly concerning fog. Do not worry, for no weather will scare us away!” The siren promised, gently pointing out where the phone was before setting off in the direction of her boss.

~

Liam - her lovely Selkie boyfriend - walked hand in hand with her as the pair of them made their way through the dense fog towards Leonne, nodding politely to the vampire. “The young ones are inside - Vivi is practicing one of her card tricks, and I believe that Luci is checking to make sure that her cannon is in working order again. There is definitely something strange about this fog… And perhaps a bit unfriendly, but as we are merely wandering travelers, so long as we do not tarry here for longer than necessary, I believe that we should be safe… Perhaps tag Luci with a locator spell so that we can find her pieces a bit faster?”

Liam shivered a little, squinting a bit, squeezing her hand a little bit and muttering quietly “I think that we should push for a modest crowd, nothing too big. We’re still in the newer territories for The Gentry to try to claim but…” The selkie shivers a little bit, a quiet warble in the back of his throat as he presses closer to his beautiful, badass girlfriend “This reeks of some sort of portent and I’m not about to get pulled into some bullshit quest, or tied down to some scheming being who’s hidden my coat somewhere.”

Zosme growled a little, her eyes flashing with protective wrath “As if I would let someone make you a meek little house-husband, my love. I would sing them to a slow and miserable death, until they are begging we take your coat back before drinking full and deep their life’s blood, giving you their still-beating heart as a prize.”

Leonne nodded, a concerned frown appearing on her face “Duly noted - and I suppose that we should angle for a mainly human crowd, despite how… Judgmental they can be?”

“Yes.” Both Zosme and Liam responded at the same time, nodding in unison.

“Ah, well. It can’t be helped, and I’d rather not have to deal with any of territorial nonsense. I’m not part of a coven for many reasons, the rules that come with being part of a group being one of them.”  The Ring Mistress responded with a sigh. “Patrol the grounds until ten minutes before your act begins. Contact me if we have company.”

Siren and Selkie nodded in understanding, this small, travelling circus was very much their home, and they would defend it from anyone who would seek to tear apart their rag-tag little family apart with ridiculous and irritating notions of what beings like them could or should do.

~

Eloise sighed as her phone rang. She had just caught the last of the fish that Zosme needed for food, had swung by the blood bank for Boss, found some unusual teas and a couple dozen macarons for Luci, and managed to talk the spectral proprietor of the unusual candy and pastry shop to let her purchase some spectral sweets for Vivi. She even found those sea-being friendly chocolates that Liam had begged her to try to find, as a surprise for his girlfriend. Eloise had a couple of hours before she needed to head back and had decided to crash at a hotel to catch some much-needed sleep and was just about to check in to a comfortable place to nap that had this neat time-dilation spell on it that would allow her to get a full eight hours of sleep well before she had to get to work. Was it spendy? Yes. But Eloise was going to be up all night taking tickets and handing out food to the customers and wanted to make sure that she was going to be ready for opening night. Unless it was her parents, demanding that she come home from the circus. In which case she’d just ignore it and sign in. But no, it was the boss. “Hey boss, what’s up?”  She asked, yawning a little.

“Miss Eloise, have you noticed the fog today?” Leonne asked without preamble.

The human blinked a little, utterly confused as she walked out of the hotel doors. Unless the weather had changed in the past five minutes, it had been a warm, sunny day. This had not changed “Uh… Boss, I’m not sure where you are right now, but it’s clear blue skies and warm, bright sun. I figured you’d be indoors because of the light bothering your eyes.” That’s how she’d been taught how to talk about her boss’s vampirism in public. Then again, people could get really weird about a lot of things, and Ellie had long since learned how to roll with the punches.

“Non! The fog rolled in shortly after you left in the morning to get us all something to eat… Come back to us, please. Something strange is happening, and I fear we may need to pack up and head elsewhere. Or at least change locations.”  Leonne responded, sounding as startled and confused as Eloise felt.

Damn, and she’d already started the word of mouth campaign, spreading throughout the city about the circus. Eloise didn’t understand why Mrs. Leonne wouldn’t let her post about the circus online, but none of them were particularly fond of human gadgetry - and talking about a zombie in a circus could draw the wrong sort of people. Lucette was a sweet, intelligent kid, and the last thing that Eloise wanted was for some dumb asshole to try to kill her for being an abomination… Or worse. “Yes boss. I’ll be there as soon as I can. I’ll text you when I’m about ten minutes out.”

“Good. Travel safely.”  Leonne acknowledged before hanging up.

~

Sure enough, as soon as Eloise hit the side of town that The Moonlight Carnival was set-up in - perfectly legally, mind you. They had all of the permits and zoning requirements as needed per city, county and state laws… There was a fog wall. Thick as anything and looking very much like a physical barrier. There were also beings in neat, black and white pinstripe suits patrolling the perimeter looking incredibly official and intimidating. Despite everything that she’d been taught in school, the human moved closer to the group, catching the…

Moonstone lotus pins that each of them wore above their left breast pockets, just above neatly folded blood-red handkerchiefs that were probably silk or something equally expensive. Eloise cursed quietly to herself as she pulled out her phone, looking up where the nearest public rose garden was, walking with purpose away from the patrolling beings, doing their best to seem unconcerned by what they were doing so long as they didn’t go after her.

She stepped lightly over the barrier of salt-stones and garlic plants, across the fast-flowing water and into the public rose garden, heading straight for one of the ovals (carefully maintained so as not to turn into circles as an unwitting invitation to the fae) and called her boss.

“Eloise, are you alright? I cannot hear you.” Leonne asked, concern in her voice.

As if she was really ten minutes away, Leonne could hear her heartbeat, if the vampire so chose. “I sought sanctuary in a rose garden. Sorry about that, but The Gilded Lotus has cordoned the half of the town that the circus is in. I’m not sure if they’re after you or someone else, but you all should really clear off. I saw a dozen of the smug fuckers patrolling the fog-barrier, so whatever they’re after, they really want it.”

“Merde. Stay there until I call you again. I dislike the noisiness of this city and I don’t feel like putting on a show tonight. I’ll inform the others of that.” Leonne responded with an irritated growl underlining her words.

“Yes boss.” Eloise answered back. This wasn’t the first time they’d skipped town because of local bullshit, and it likely wouldn’t be the last.

[professional-anti]

Chapter Seven: The Five-Dimensional Door

Before I start, I just want to say that I’m having so much fun with this blog, and thank you to everyone who is reading these snarks! You make my day <3 Okay, time for the good stuff.

Chapter 7: The Five-Dimensional Door

So we’re in Dory’s apartment, and it’s basically a stereotypical witchy apartment. Incense, star posters, you know the drill. They go about getting tea for themselves as if there aren’t more Nazgûl upstairs. Um, there’s a weird inversion of the Not Like Other Girls trope. Jace says he doesn’t want Earl Grey bc he hates bergamot and Clary’s like:

“You may be the only guy my age I’ve ever met who knows what bergamot is, much less that it’s in Earl Grey tea.”

“Yes, well,” Jace said, with a supercilious look, “I’m not like other guys.”

At least this isn’t predicated on sexist nonsense, but at the same time, it’s still Jace being annoying about how Special he is. Jace does have a nice moment right after when Clary tells him not to call her “Fray” (it reminds her of Simon) and he agrees immediately not to. But this is just basic human decency, and I hate that THIS is the nicest thing Jace has done for pages.

While Dory’s in the kitchen, Clary and Jace have a conversation filled with so much bullshit that I have to quote the whole thing:

She heard him drop the book back onto the shelf. “This must be the trash she keeps up front to impress credible mundanes,” he said, sounding disgusted. “There’s not one serious text here.”

“Just because it’s not the kind of magic you do—,” Clary began crossly.

He scowled furiously, silencing her. “I do not do magic,” he said. “Get that through your head: Human beings are not magic users. It’s part of what makes them human. Warlocks can only use magic because they have demon blood.”

Clary took a moment to process this. “But I’ve seen you use magic. You use enchanted weapons—”

“I use tools that are magical. And just to be able to do that, I have to undergo rigorous training. The rune tattoos on my skin protect me too. If you tried to use one of the seraph blades, for instance, it’d probably burn your skin, maybe kill you.”

“What if I got the tattoos?” Clary asked. “Could I use them then?”

“No,” Jace said crossly. “The Marks are only part of it. There are tests, ordeals, levels of training—look, just forget it, okay? Stay away from my blades. In fact, don’t touch any of my weapons without my permission.”

Okay. There’s a lot to unpack here. I barely know where to start. Let’s begin with the easiest thing: the word “crossly”. It’s used twice in one exchange, and since it’s such a unique word (for an American book, at least), it really gets repetitive. It also makes even more obvious that this is high-key Harry Potter fanfiction; JK uses “crossly” all the time, which makes sense BECAUSE SHE’S A BRITISH WRITER. When an American writer does this, it sounds like they’re trying to be British. I wonder why CC would do that…

Secondly, the way Jace treats Clary. He didn’t fully explain magic to her, and now he’s so epically pissed off when she doesn’t know all the minutia of the word. It’s ridiculous. “Get that through your head”??? I would slap a boy who said that to me, not fall in love with him. It’s really atrocious how Jace talks to Clary, and I’m mad.

Thirdly, this still sounds like magic to me. Shadowhunters are the only people who can use steles. Steles are basically wands, then, right? Harry Potter can’t do magic without a wand, either. So I’m still not convinced that Jace and co. aren’t doing magic. They’re the only people who can use steles, therefore they’re the only people who can use angel weapons, etc. etc. etc. Also, can someone PLEASE tell me who makes these weapons? That has to be done with magic.

Okay, I just googled it, and apparently a group of female Shadowhunters called the Iron Sisters make Shadowhunter weapons. How do they do this without magic???? This whole thing still sounds like magic, I’m not gonna lie.

Fourthly, Jace’s desire to distance himself so much from magic and Warlocks reads a lot like racism to me. Of course, this probably won’t be adressed ever.

We good? We good.

Dory absolutely murders Jace:

“If you were have as funny as you thought you were, my boy, you’d be twice as funny as you are.”

Go OFF, Dory. And Jace is rude to Dory some more (Dory is HOSTING them and giving them food, he could be a little nicer I swear to Gd) and then calls Dory a liar. Dory responds that she’s not a Warlock but her mother was, and Jace says that’s not true bc Warlocks are half-human and half-demon and can’t have kids and Clary says “Like mules” and Jace says “Your knowledge of livestock is astounding” and do you guys see why I hate him??

Jace explaisn that Warlocks are the strongest of all Downworlders bc they have a direct demon parent, but that all Downworlders have demon blood. Vampires and werewolves have demon infections and faeries are either fallen angels or half-demon and half-angel. Dorothea explains that she was adopted by a warlock in order to “watch and guard.”

Oh. Ugh. Dory compliments Clary’s appetite and Clary thinks about Isabelle and feels fat. It’s just some gross girl-fighting-girl nonsense, and Clary is basically feeling shamed for eating a lot of mini sandwiches when she hasn’t eaten for at least a whole day. There was no need to include this in here.

Dory reads Jace’s future, and it’s all generic stuff that is supposed to be Meaningful. Then she tries to read Clary’s, but can’t make sense of it. She asks Clary if there’s a spell in place to repress her memories, and Clary (being awfully bold, if you ask me) says “No, of course not” even though there’s so much stuff that could have been hidden from her. She just learned she’s a Shadowhunter and that her mom’s been lying to her, why would she dismiss this out of hand? Jace agrees with Dory, for once. There’s some truly awful banter, and then Dory pulls out her tarot cards and tells Clary to pick one. She ends up with the Ace of Cups, or, as Dory explains, “The love card.” Apparently Clary’s mom painted these cards. Blah blah blah I’m bored.

Dory gives some backstory; in exchange for favors from Jocelyn, she’d spill the tea on the Downworlders and look out for Valentine. And, you guys aren’t gonna believe this…Jocelyn was a Shadowhunter…

Ik, ik. I’m having trouble comprehending it, too. This twist was just SUCH a twist, you know?? Clary freaks the fuck out for maybe the millionth time. Jace and Dory fight bc she’s basically running a safe-house for Downworlders on the run and Jace is like “Downworlders suck” (gotta love that racism your Love Interest espouses) and accuses Dory that she’s only running the house for the money. We get a glimpse of Dory’s gold molars, so maybe we’re supposed to think that means she’s rich? But I’m pretty sure the most expensive tooth fillings are composite bc they’re tooth-colored.

Jace threatens to call the Clave aka the cops bc Downworlders can’t have anything nice I guess. Then they find a weird-looking door, which Jace calls a Portal. You can tell it’s Important bc of the Capitilization. It leads to anywhere you want to go. Clary proves that she can’t think a single solitary step ahead bc she leaps out of the door to see where her mother would have gone. I guess this is like a flue powder situation?

Chapter seven draws to a merciful close. I’m going to go take a nap.

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Fat

Agnes/Estinien. CW fatphobia. Set sometime after 4.0, Agnes and Estinien have some time alone together after being separated for so long. 

What a day! Estinien thought as he squeezed Agnes’ soft hip. Fucking, breakfast, more fucking, lunch, a swim, a little fuck, dinner, and now a stroll. “Anything catching your eye, sweetheart?”

Agnes looked at the various wares in the Kugane Dori. “Not really, but then again, I don’t need anything at the moment, love.”

“It’s not about needing anything; it’s about wanting anything.”

“Yes, but I have all I want right here.” She said, leaning her head against his shoulder.

She’s too fucking sweet I swear to the Fury. “Aye, but if I take a few hunt marks tomorrow I can buy you something nice.”

“But there’s-“

“Agi, you’re paying for this whole trip. Let me at least do something.”

Agnes giggled. “Technically you have been doing things. Like things in the bedroom. And on the beach.”

The elezen rolled his eyes. “I’m your…” Not “boyfriend” that’s stupid. Not fiancé, not yet. “Partner. I should be able to buy you some sort of token or trinket. You’ve paid for this entire trip.”

“Estinien,” Agnes began, wrapping her arm around his narrow waist. “We’ve been apart for so long, and I’m happy that I could pay for this trip that we both well deserve. I don’t want tokens or trinkets or any such thing. I want to be with you. That’s all.” She paused. “Though, I could use something cold to drink. It’s still quite warm.”

Estinien nodded. Though he had now spent nearly a year in the Far East, he still disliked how horrifically hot and humid it could get on some days. “There’s a stand there, Agi. If you give me some gil, I’ll buy us drinks.”

“You sure? I could-“

Estinien placed a kiss on her lips. “Pray sit, my sweet. I’ll be but a moment.”

Agnes blushed and handed him some gil. “Some iced milk tea would be lovely.”

“Coming right up.” He kissed her again and despite being in public, pinched her ass. He could hear a little “oh!” from her, which made him smirk. Have to keep her on her toes.

Estinien placed their order---the iced milk tea for Agnes and iced green tea for him---and stood not too far away from where Agnes was sitting on a bench. An older Hingashi woman sat opposite her.

“Hello!” Estinien heard Agnes say happily.

“Aren’t you ashamed of yourself?” The old woman sneered. What the—

That clearly caught Agnes off guard. “I-I beg your pardon?”

“The way you look, young lady. You’re with a man like that and look at you. So fat.”

A fiery rage burned through Estinien. How fucking dare she.

Though he couldn’t see it, Agnes’ mouth was agape. “I-I-I’m sorry?”

“You should be. Such a pretty face, but tsk just look at the rest of you. He’ll find someone else if you don’t lose weight.”

That’s it.

Estinien strode to Agnes and the old woman with his chest puffed and face clearly enraged. “What did you say to my lady?”

The old woman glanced at him, still sneering. “She’s fat. You deserve someone who takes care of herself, not a cow.”

“I-I-“

He gripped both of his large hands upon Agnes’ shoulders. Fury grant me the strength to not throttle this hag. “I’ll have you know, madam, that Agnes is gorgeous in my eyes. Should she weight twice or three times as much as she does now, she’ll still be beautiful. And I’ll want to fuck her brains out every second of every day. Now, piss off.”

The old woman, still sneering, got up and walked away.

Estinien moved quickly to crouch in front of Agnes. What he saw broke his heart.

Her mouth was still open. Her chocolate eyes still wide, and tears were streaming down her face. “I-I-“

“Agi, don’t listen to that old bitch.”

Her bottom lip quivered. “But why would she say that? I was just trying to be friendly.”

“Because she’s a miserable old woman who has nothing better to do.” Estinien heard their order being called out. “I’m going to get our drinks and be right back, okay?”

Agnes nodded and looked down at her hands. Tears were still flowing.

Back to the inn? Or stay? Maybe take her to a quiet spot by the water? Estinien took their drinks, walked back to Agnes, and sat beside her, offering her the iced milk tea. “One iced milk tea, for the lady.”

Agnes wordlessly took it and refused to look at him.

“Agi, you know nothing she said was true. I would never leave you.” Never. Not when the dragon inside screams “mate” every time I’m with you. “Hey,” he put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her to him. “it was all lies. All of it.”

The tears flowed more readily now. “It’s not though is it? I’ve been called fat to my face before loads of times and I know I’m not pretty and I shouldn’t let it bother me because it’s all true…” Agnes was openly sobbing now. “This is just who I am! I try so fucking hard. Some days I feel so pretty like today and now I f-feel like shit.”

Estinien placed his drink next to him and pulled Agnes closer to him. “Sweet girl, none of it is true. You’re not a bloody cow. You’re so beautiful. I’m so lucky. So lucky to have you.” I am the lucky one---you put up with my nonsense. Our time apart. My desire for privacy. My nightmares. “Agnes Currai, you are gorgeous inside and out.”

Agnes sniffled and took her glasses off. After a few moments, she composed herself and wiped away her tears. “’Stinien, I can’t believe you said you’d fuck me every second of every day to her.” She giggled, cleaning her glasses on her dress.

“Hmph, well it’s true.”

Agnes put her glasses back on and smiled at him. Thank fuck she seems to be alright now.

“You okay?” He asked softly, brushing a strand of her dark red hair out of her face.

“I think so…I just…I don’t want it to ruin our evening.”

“Nay sweetheart, let me ruin you this evening. Let me show you how much I love your perfect body.” He growled. “I will eat your sweet cunt and then fuck you until morning, should you desire it.”

Agnes blushed. She blushes so damn prettily. I fucking love it. “Well, when you put it that way…” She wrinkled her nose and then gave him a little kiss on his ear. “As long as you let me be on top for some of that, love. Then I’ll be amenable.”

They both got up, and Estinien insisted on taking both their drinks. It was then that Agnes did something that truly surprised him.

She pinched his ass.

And winked at him.

And practically started skipping back to the inn.

If the offer of fucking the night away and letting her plump ass ride him for some of it made her so happy, then perhaps, this occur more often.

What was it Handeloup says? Happy wife happy life? She’s not my wife yet but I’ll see her happy and loved and cared for and treated like the goddess she is.

[toxickimi]

Fallout 4 AU Ch1 Pathetic

This is the first of many chapters of an AU(alternate universe) of Fallout 4. It is purely out of fun and weebness. Please don't come at me saying it doesn't make sense for Fallout 4, it's not suppose to.  I welcome feedback! Please check out my other works!

The morning was bright, with birds chirping. Azumiral had woken up long before dawn just as all servants did. She dressed herself then gathered her books heading to her sisters' rooms. She walked into the first room waking Kigra up. "It's time to wake, princess." Azumiral drew the curtains back, allowing the sun to enter the room. This caused Kigra to let out a hiss, before pulling the covers over her face. "Must you wake me in such a fashion!?" Azumiral sighed, placing paper work down. "Just because I renounced my title doesn't make me any less of your older sister and doesn't give you the right to talk to me as such. Now, get up." Azumiral waved her hand towards Kigra's bed causing a gust of wind to blow the covers off. "Fine! Send in the maids." Kigra sat up, grumbling in anger. Azumiral had nodded and left, going to Kimikyo's room next. Kimikyo was already awake, sitting at her bay window, staring out the window. "Good morning, Kimikyo." Kimikyo looked over at Azumiral before looking back out the window. "Another restless night?" "Yes." Azumiral walked over to Kimikyo's desk placing papers and books down. "The nightmares?" Kimikyo remained silent before she got up. "I'll send in your maids to get you ready." "No thank you...I'd rather them not see me today."

Azumiral titled her head at Kimikyo before nodding. "Very well. We have studies in thirty minutes. Don't be late."Azumiral left the room, leaving Kimikyo alone in her room. Kimikyo walked over to her closet, pulling out a clean dress. She put it on then put on a circlet that had diamonds and emeralds. She walked out of the room, carrying her shoes in her hand. As she walked, the servants bowed to her and greeting her to which she bowed and greeted back. She walked into the kitchen that was bustling with cooks moving around quickly. "Good morning little princess." "Good morning." "Are you not joining your mother, the queen, this morning?" Kimikyo shook her head. "No...not today. May I have some tea and cookies?" "I'll have them sent to the study room. Azumiral already stopped by and urged us to make sure you arrive on time today." Kimikyo groaned before nodding. The cook tossed an apple to Kimikyo, who caught it. "Fret not, little princess, she means well. They all do." "I suppose." Kimikyo left the kitchen, walking down the long halls towards the study room. Azumiral and Kigra were already there, discussing some papers. Kimikyo took her seat, waiting for the two to be finished. Azumiral began the lesson she had for the two, transformation. Azumiral led the two to a court yard where she instructed the two to transform. Kigra went first, transforming into a silvered unicorn. "Very good, Kigra." Kigra lifted her head up in a gloating manner. "Let's see yours Kimikyo." Kigra sneared, as she turned back into a human. "Kigra. Enough...Kimikyo do you think you can try today?" Kimikyo looked at her two sisters before looking away. She walked over to the small pond. She sighed and transformed into a koi fish, causing Kigra to laugh. Kimikyo turned back into her human form, but stayed in the pond. "A pathetic fish! That's the best you can do?" Azumiral sighed, walking away to allow the two sisters to argue as usual. "It's better then a unicorn with a fat butt!" Kigra gasped. "You take that back!" "No way! That flank of yours can take out an army the second you turn around." "Well at least I'm not some washed up princess who can only become a fish. I mean really? You're royalty at least become a mermaid or something use full." "Yea..well..I never wanted to be some princess anyways!" Kimikyo took her circlet off, tossing it to the ground. "What are you saying? You'd rather be a peasant?" Kimikyo stepped out of the pond, her gown heavy with water.

The two began to argue more aggressively then normal this causing Azumiral to step in. "Enough." The two ignored her, Kigra forming a ball of Earthly energy in her hand to toss at Kimikyo. Kimikyo also formed a ball of magic but it had swirls of purple in it. The two hurled the magic at each other but in an attempt to stop Kimikyo's Azumiral through up a shield causing a the magics to split, sending a shock wave to know the three down. Kimikyo was the first to get up, she was rubbing her head. She looked over to see a portal had opened. She walked over to it, placing her hand through it then pulling it out. "Interesting..." She looked back to see Kigra, sitting up. "What the...? Kimikyo get away from that." "Or what? You'll have my head?" Kimikyo looked back at it as Kigra walked up. "This...could lead to a new land...a faster way to travel." "Then we'll have the captain of the guard look. Let's get Azumiral and go." "Kigra don't you see? This is my chance, I could prove to mama that I'm just as capable as the captain and-" "This again? You're a princess! Not a soldier! Just let this go Kimikyo." "No way. I'm going in!" Kimikyo took a deep breath before walking through the portal. The world around her was much different from her own. The air stung her lungs and burned her eyes. She squinted, seeing soldiers in armor staring back at her. She stumbled back, tripping on a rock. "Halt. Who are you?" "Where did you come from." She didn't open her mouth, she simply walked up to the examining them before leaving through the portal.

Aiko was stood on the other side, along with a small army behind her. "Kimikyo!" Aiko wrapped her arms around her daughter. "Mama..?" "Kigra explained that this portal opened and you were dragged inside. You had us so worried." Aiko sent the troops through the portal as Azumiral and Aiko led Kimikyo to the bathing quarters. The maids had helped her cleaned her of the radiation that collected on her skin. "Kimikyo?" "Kigra..?" Kimikyo looked over, seeing Kigra standing by the door. "Oh thank the divines. You were gone in that horrid place for so long." "Long...it was only a couple minutes." Kimikyo looked at the maids who were uneasy. "Kimikyo..your were gone for over an hour..." Kimikyo was dried off then dressed in new clothing. "Strange. Have the troops returned?" Kigra shook her head, walking with Kimikyo to wander the castle. "No. Mother sent them to gather intel and their leader if possible. That portal isn't apart of this world. Hell not even this universe. Mother's pretty pissed that it opened and is having that whole courtyard locked down." "Typical." "Typical..? Kimikyo you're naïve, I get it. Your the youngest of us all and you act all grown up but you don't get it. There were high amounts of radiation and who else knows what. You could have died." Kimikyo rolled her eyes walking the opposite way. "Kimikyo. Another thing. The Prince of Windhelm is here...mother wants you to greet him in the dining hall." Kimikyo sighed before turning back around to follow her sister. The two walked in silence with Kimikyo sighing before the two walked into the dining hall. "Ah daughters, so glad you could grace us." Kigra bowed to Aiko, taking her place next to her. Kimikyo bowed as well but didn't move from her spot. "Kimikyo I'd like you to meet-" "No. I decline this union." Kimikyo looked at the prince who had women swooning around him. "Kimikyo." "He's going to cheat on me anyways." She did not look away once from the man. "Yet you can't take your eyes off me dear princess." "Don't take it as flattery. You are argent and vain. Tell me, how many woman enter your chambers at night?" "Plenty." Kimikyo turned away from him, looking at Aiko who was composed but Kimikyo could tell she's furious. Kimikyo left the dining hall, hearing Aiko talking to the prince's dad who could only chuckle. "Quite a princess isn't she?" "I do apologize my lord. She's not taken to any men since her brother left." "Oh think nothing of it. My son is very much a ladies man. He's had more lovers then I can count." "I still give you my deepest apologies."

Kimikyo had lingered by the door before walking back towards the courtyard. There stood two unknown men. He looked human but had holes in his skin showing machinery. Soon another man walked through he too looked human but his skin was wrinkled and was missing his nose and ears, but had curly golden hair. "Whoa, Nicky just where are we?" "No clue, but my guess we're not in Kansas." Kimikyo stood and stared at them before they noticed her. "You live here kid?" Kimikyo looked terrified but nodded to them. "I'm...I'm princess Kimikyo." "Princess! Well allow me to dust off my manners." The curly haired man chuckled taking his hat off and bowing to her. "Name's Hancock and this is Nick." Kimikyo could hear knights walking down the hall before she looked back at the men. "You mustn't be here. They will imprison you." "Nonsense. We're harmless." Before the two could speak any further the knights captured the two. "Hancock you really need to learn to listen to other people." The two were taken to the dungeon. The night soon fell and Aiko had requested Kimikyo to the throne room. "Just when do plan on growing up? You've denied or ran off any prince or duke that I bring here." Kimikyo stared at the ground, listening to Aiko. "Do you want to bring dishonor to our kingdom? Do you think I like arranging these meetings? Kimikyo are you listening?" "Yes, mama." "Then why do you keep doing this?" Kimikyo looked up at Aiko, seeing Kigra standing behind her. "Why does it matter? You have Kigra to be queen after you, why does my life concern you?" "Excuse me? Just because Kigra is being groomed as queen, doesn't mean I don't care about your future. You are princess of this kingdom and as such I will not have you running around doing whatever." "What if...what if I --?" "This again?" Aiko turned, glaring down at Kimikyo. "You are a lady. Being a knight is no place for you. You will act as a princess and be next in line after Kigra, should something happen. Please Kimikyo, this kingdom has already lost one heir...don't allow it to loose another." Kimikyo went to go speak before bowing and leaving. Aiko sat on her throne sighing. "Give her time mother. She'll come around." "Will she though Kigra? Ever since Kai went missing she's been distant." Kigra looked over at the empty throne next to her mother's. "In her defense on the marriage part...you've ruled for years without a husband. I'll be married soon enough and I don't plan on dying so...why not ease up on finding her a husband?" Aiko looked at Kigra before nodding. "Very well...promise you'll help her if I die before she takes a husband." "I promise mother. Now about those two intruders."

Kimikyo had looked around before going to the dungeon where only the two from before were. "Pretty empty joint huh?" "Shut up, Hancock." "What? I'm just saying an empty jail is a good sign." Kimikyo listened to the two before making her self known. "Jesus! Has anyone thought of getting you a bell?" "It's been discussed before. Are you two mythicals?" Nick and Hancock looked at each other before back at the girl. "Are we what?" "You know...mythical creatures? Like dragons, unicorns, in your case a golem?" Kimikyo pointed at Nick. "I'm a synth and he's a ghoul." "Do those things live here?! I've never seen a unicorn ever!" Kimikyo looked at Hancock before back at Nick. "You're not from this world?" "Sorry toots we're not even sure where we are. We just saw this white light and walked into it." "Which was something stupid to do even for you Hancock.." The two went back and forth before looking at Kimikyo. "Can you help us get back to our place?" Kimikyo looked around before handing Nick the cell key. "You can't leave yet. Mama will want to talk to you. Are you hungry, thirsty?" "We don't really need to eat like normal humans." Kimikyo nodded before leaving. Soon enough the two were escorted to Aiko. They were questioned extensively for hours before they were sent back to the cell. Waiting in the cell was a tray of food and drink along with a note. "I know you said you didn't eat but one of you looks like he needs food or at least water. Also there's a map on the back." Nick turned over the note, seeing a crudely drawn map. The two quickly left the dungeon, taking the note with them.

Hancock stopped before they got to the portal. "Wait, don't you think we should thank the girl?" Nick rolled his eyes before sighing. "We don't even know where or who she is." "Then let's look!" Hancock dragged the unwilling Nick around the castle, until they made it outside near the animal wing of the castle. "Whoa! I must have hit some really good jet earlier." "Hancock this isn't one of your drugged induced trips! This is actually happening." Just as Nick finished speaking a basilisk cobra coiled around the two, lightly squeezing them. It let out a roaring hiss, alerting Kimikyo who was luckily in the feed pins. "Iza!" She rushed over to her pet, inspecting what had him angered. "Iza, it's okay...put them down." At her command the basilisk released them before going over to Kimikyo, staying behind her. "I thought I told you to leave. Do you know how dangerous this place is?" Kimikyo was glaring at Hancock who was grinning. "Look, lady this is all just one big trip." Nick facepalmed as Kimikyo's eye twitched. "I'll wake up and be back at Good Neighbor in no time." Kimikyo looked over at Nick, waiting an explanation. "I was trying to get out but this knuckle head think this is a drug induce dream." "Well convince him it is not! You need to leave before my mother finds you two." "Look, if I could I would have already." Kimikyo looked around before huffing. "I hope you two aren't afraid of spiders." She dragged the two to the feeding pen where a husky sized black window was enjoying a meal. Instead of an hour glass symbol there was a obvious rose. "Rose..." Kimikyo slowly walked over to the spider, patting her head. "Can you wrap that one in your web?" She pointed over to Hancock. The spider threw it's front two legs up in excitement. "That's quite a lively pet." While Rose chased a terrified Hancock around Kimikyo and Nick watched. "I've raised her since she hatched, she's only a baby." Rose had finally caught Hancock, wrapping him in her web. "Rose, leave his head uncovered. No killing." After about fifteen minutes, Rose finished wrapping Hancock up, leaving a long enough piece of web for Nick to drag him back. "Now you guys need to leave." Kimikyo handed the web over to Nick. "Thanks. Maybe we'll meet up again." "Perhaps. Now go." Nick dragged Hancock back through the portal as Kimikyo stayed by her pets. Rose returned to her meal as Kimikyo finished feeding the other animals.

As the night continued Aiko had already sent troops through the portal to bring back any willing king, prince, or leader. She then wrote and sent letters to the mages of the court requesting their assistance to relocate the portal. Aiko had stayed awake through the night with a locate builder to began a strong hold to be built for the portal. It was to have an alarm system should anyone walk through it as well as fortified walls and an area for guards to be posted. The building of the string hold and moving of the portal would take a weeks time. Before Aiko could receive any type of sleep one of the knights sent a note through the portal informing her of four people who will be coming through the portal. She sighed and sent additional knights to guard the portal before increasing the patrol to ensure the safety of everyone in the castle.

[avatarrewatch]

Hello and I hope you have enjoyed your stay in Ba Sing Se so far. I am your host Joo Dee. Remember, everyone is safe. There is no war in Ba Sing Se. Today we watched the following episodes in “Book 2: Earth.” We will also be watching the same episodes tomorrow (Sunday, March 18, 2018) at the same time.

2.13 

The Drill 

With the Gaang in Ba Sing Se, Azula, Mai and Ty Lee (whom I will dub “the Trio” moving forward) arrive in Ba Sing Se with the Fire Nation military and The Drill the episode is named for. This drill was created to penetrate Ba Sing Se’s impenetrable wall. Ba Sing Se’s General Sung seems to be so comforted by the presence of the wall, that it takes him no time at all to tell Aang that the Avatar is not needed, but the Gaang is not dissuaded. Aang, Katara and Sokka successfully sneak into the the drill to damage it from the inside. While Toph, refusing to be without her bending, commits to slowing down the drill from the outside. The Gaang encounters the Trio and a fight ensues with Aang showing off the earthbending he’s most recently learned. It was pretty impressive! Oh, and Momo got to save the day! I knew I always liked Momo for a reason. It’s not just because he’s cute. The Gaang escapes the Trio and the drill is successfully stopped.

Lee and Mushi (or otherwise known as Zuko and Iroh, respectively) arrive in Ba Sing Se as well. You’d think they were following the Avatar or something! But no, actually, Iroh’s White Lotus contacts decided since the pair are practically refugees, that Ba Sing Se would be ideal for them. Iroh flirts with a ticket seller to get into Ba Sing Se, while Jet (and his wheatgrass!) jeatgrass.tumblr.com flirts with Zuko to try and get him to join the new reformed Freedom Fighters. That’s right folks! Since the last time we saw Jet, he has decided to change his ways and only do what’s right. Let’s see if he’ll live up that goal.

2.14  

City of Walls and Secrets  

We see the Gaang on an earthbending operated train travelling to the inner wall. They meet me! Joo Dee. I introduce them as their guide and waive off any attempts the Gaang make to meet the Earth King. Because of course, “one doesn't just pop in on the Earth King.” How laughable! We meet the Dai Li (cultural authority of Ba Sing Se) and its leader Long Feng when Toph and Katara dress up like high society girls to sneak into a party in order to meet the Earth King. In the meantime, Aang and Sokka manage to sneak into the party as busboys. We see Bosco for the first time as he voraciously attacks the food in front of him. Long Feng takes the Gaang aside and tells them that the Earth King doesn’t have time to get involved in “political squabbles and the day to day minutiae of military activities. What’s most important to his royal majesty is maintaining the cultural heritage of Ba Sing Se.” It is the Dai Li that oversees the military and other resources. The Gaang are warned that they will be watched very closely to make sure they don’t mention the war to anyone lest they be expelled from the city and be unable find Appa.

Jet, knowing Zuko and Iroh are Fire Nation after spotting evidence of Iroh firebending, starts obsessively spying on the two. Zuko and Iroh start working in a tea shop. After repeated attempts to catch Zuko and Iroh firebending fail, Jet decides to attack them at the tea shop in an attempt to force at least one of them to use their firebending. Iroh cleverly insists that Jet is just confused, everyone else comes to the conclusion that Jet is violently crazy and Jet gets taken in by the Dai Li. He is brainwashed to believe: "There is no war within the walls. Here we are safe. Here we are free."

2.15

The Tales of Ba Sing Se 

Katara decides to take Toph on a girls day out. After putting on some makeup and taking a stroll, they walk onto a bridge where some girls make fun of their makeup. Toph, ever unwilling to put up with such behaviour, earthbends them into the water. Katara then comforts her friend. I’m glad these two are actually getting along.

Aang, while looking for Appa, sees the state of the animals living in a poorly funded zoo and decides to free them. He causes a massive havoc and ruins the cabbage man’s cabbages again. At least that rabbaroo got to eat though! Aang forces the guards to open the gates and quickly makes a nice habitat for the zoo animals which the zoo keeper thanks him for.

Someone tries to mug Iroh. Iroh, being Iroh, corrects his stance and gives him some life advice. The mugger graciously thanks him and commits to seeking his goal of being a masseur. Just Iroh things! Iroh honours his son’s death as the entire membership of the Avatar Rewatch cries with him.

Zuko gets asked out on a date by a girl named Jin. I rather like her. Unfortunately for Zuko, he makes quite a few awkward and rather gauche moves. The two still end up kissing, but Zuko very quickly decides after that it simply cannot work between them. So sad. But I guess Mai is happy with this decision.

Momo gets chased around by some felines and does some impromptu street dancing before getting locked in a cage beside the same felines. He very easily escapes, and decides to graciously free his former pursuers.

2.16

 Appa’s Lost Days 

We see Appa being captured by sandsailers and sold to a circus. The animal trainer mistreats Appa, but he bonds with a little boy that feeds him. Appa manages to escape during a show after performing a few tricks. He searches for his air nomad with no luck as he retraces his steps. We are shown a flashback of Appa and Aang meeting for the first time as youngsters. And we see that Appa and Aang are thinking of each other throughout the night. Appa goes through so many hard times with humans and other animals, he grows defensive of anyone that may harm him. Suki and the other Kyoshi warriors find a hungry, dirty and injured Appa. After the Kyoshi Warriors take care of him for a little while, and gain Appa’s trust, the Trio attacks. Appa manages to escape with the Kyoshi warriors help.

Fanart

Joo Dee:

http://superootoro.tumblr.com/post/90039544929/joo-dee-was-scary-as-shit-old-one-from-2010

http://sailortenchi.tumblr.com/post/161387243649/joo-dee-brought-to-you-by-a-collaboration-with-my

http://airbenderbabe.tumblr.com/post/109199937761/hello-my-name-is-joo-dee-i-have-been-given-the

Fancy Earth Kingdom Toph: http://korraquality.tumblr.com/post/79851806814/made-a-fancy-earth-kingdom-toph-to-go-with-the

Appa: http://raphodraws.tumblr.com/post/162362518137/so-my-sister-asked-me-to-make-her-an-avatar-themed

http://biram-ba-gallery.tumblr.com/post/148396635372/book-one-water-ive-been-watching-avatar-

http://angi-pants.tumblr.com/post/168337532892/cute-appa-concept-3-yes-no

Jet: http://istehlurvz.tumblr.com/post/158382341744/i-cant-believe-i-always-come-full-circle-on-old

http://thesearchingastronaut.tumblr.com/post/171707418292/today-i-missed-atla-so-i-drew-jet-because-he-was

The Gaang: http://raphodraws.tumblr.com/post/162442066567/ok-so-after-design-no1-got-rejected-have-design

Bosco and The Earth King: http://zeddfro.tumblr.com/post/166491061201/inktober-day-16-fat-bosco-the-normal-bear

Suki: http://angi-pants.tumblr.com/post/171903584627/sneak-peak-suki-is-finally-ready-for-approval

Suki & Sokka: http://rebel-spore.tumblr.com/post/170879604308/sokka-would-so-be-all-about-valentines-day

Suki, Yue & Mai: http://puffycaveman.tumblr.com/post/120074866296/been-super-busy-lately-but-i-finally-had-some

Iroh’s tea time: https://huckdoodles.tumblr.com/post/171984618446/huckdoodles-sharing-tea-with-a-fascinating

Analysis

Caelum Blue's ATLA Episode Timeline (this is dedication!)  https://caelum-in-the-avatarverse.tumblr.com/post/171979806694/caelum-blues-atla-episode-timeline

Discord server: https://discord.gg/dtajJx3

Avatar Rewatch Calendar: http://goo.gl/NUV1Kp

(These beautiful episode title cards were created by the ever talented @ahhhsami)

[bisexualklausmikaelson]

this thing upon me, howls like a beast [2/3] ;

a/n: here’s part 2! Click here for part 1 if you haven’t read it yet! this one’s like twice as long but alas, I could not help it. I took a month to write it for a reason lolz. enjoy!

―

Klaus arrives at their home at exactly 6:45am.

Hayley grinds her teeth together, lets the sound cause her nausea before she breathes in deeply through her nose, and out her mouth. She squints her eyes and tries very hard not to throw him across the room.

“What are you doing here?” she hisses, only slightly opening the door and she’s full on bedhead, unbuttoned pyjama top, that tousled look―

God, Klaus thinks, she’s so beautiful.

“I’m taking Hope to school,” he says, with confidence.

“Who in the world told you to do that?” she asks, while rolling her eyes.

He sighs and looks around the room. It’s quiet, peaceful even. He recognizes Elijah’s ridiculously tall bookshelves that are almost touching the ceiling, Hope’s toys lying on the floor, the smell of cinnamon radiating off of Hayley’s hair.

It all felt like…home.

“I want to help out,” Klaus announces. “I overheard you and Elijah the other day, discussing on getting a babysitter since you both work and you two need someone at home to look after Hope, perhaps I could be of assistance, I―” He stops, looks at again, and notices how she’s getting annoyed with him already. He chuckles humorlessly. Hayley Marshall never was a morning person.

“Okay,” her tone is harsh and intimidating. “Enough yammering,” she orders.

“Does that mean I can help?” he immediately assumes.

She slowly raises her head to meet his gaze. Hayley takes in a sharp breath and blows her hair out of her face when she releases it. She can’t believe she has to explain this to him. Again.

“Why do you want to do this?” his eyes grow a little wide at her question. “Because you feel bad? Look I told you, you have no reason to feel guilty. I chose not to involve you, it’s not like you knew about her,” she whispers, making sure that no one hears.

Still, he is as stubborn as ever. Klaus decides he’ll use the softest tone he’s ever mastered. Because, surely, he had grown kinder over these passed few years.

“I just want to be there for her,” he admits, without hesitation. “That’s all,” he shrugs.

She studied his features and attempts to detect any sense of malice or dishonesty. But, she sees nothing. She wants to hate him for it. She can’t even remember the last time she saw him looking so pathetic.

(Oh wait she does, he looked at her in the very same way on her wedding night).

“Fine,” she finally gives in. “You can drop her off at school, but that’s it. I still want to find a real babysitter,” Hayley voices, in a rather serious tone.

He nods before he leaves with a satisfied look on his face.

―

Hope Marshall is truly the smartest little girl Klaus has ever had the pleasure of meeting.

He adjusts the car mirror and spies her looking out the window and waving goodbye to her mother. She’s always in these boyish clothes, blue jean overalls and a loose tee and never forgets her favorite sneakers that light up. Klaus knows that Hope prefers her monster trucks over her Barbie dolls. Knows that she’s afraid of the blow up things in front of gas stations, knows that she doesn’t like the smell of coffee. But loves the scent of a nice cup of licorice tea.

He knows because that’s his favorite tea. He chuckles, figuring that at least she got something from him.

“You know,” Hope says while he drives. “All these random visits you’re making are starting to get pretty suspicious,” she slowly comes to that conclusion, sitting on the edge of her seat, wondering what he’s going to say.

“What random visits?” Klaus quips.

“Well first,” she speaks softly, with a finger on her chin. “There was that time you came by during dinner, then when you claimed you ‘forgot’ your coat, and now you’re dropping me off at school!” Hope exclaims.

He laughs again, unable to meet her wit.

“I assure you, sweetheart,” he sings. “That those are all just coincidences,” Klaus attempts to convince her by sounding casual. But the slight smile tugging at the corner of his lips and glimmer in his eyes gives him away.

“You expect me to believe that?” Hope questions.

He leans back in his chair, smirking. “What’s your theory?” Klaus wonders.

“You like my mom,” she tells him, with a large grin. “It’s pretty obvious,” Hope mindlessly mumbles, catching him off-guard.

He gazes onto the on-coming traffic, exhales loudly when he realizes that this was going to be a long ride. Although, he does look forward to spending quality time with Hope. And that thought alone allows a smile to creep back on to his face.

“You’re strangely well-adjusted to that idea, aren’t you?” he smugly tells her, reminding her that her mother is married, to his brother no less.

“What can I say?” Hope shrugs instead. “I’m an adaptable child,” she whispers.

He throws his head back in laughter.

“That you are, little one,” Klaus agrees.

He turns on the radio while he reverts his focus back on her, and how she just simply goes back to staring out the window. He wonders what’s going on in that little head of hers.

―

Hayley washes the dishes,

―and every other inch of their house.

She needs distractions, and cleaning is as good of a distraction as anything else.

You see, her life had become so ordinary, filled with such mundane activities. She’s got her husband her kid, her job at the local bank. She comes home from her nine-to-five, cooks and cleans, helps Hope with her homework, tucks her in, sleeps next to Elijah―

It’s all so very…boring.

(But, this is what she wanted, isn’t it?)

―

Klaus comes by almost every morning to get Hope.

And each time, she’s more and more eager. Hayley doesn’t know what kind of sugary drinks or sweets Klaus is feeding to get her so riled up whenever she sees him. But, whatever it is, it sure is working. Deep down though, she’s probably aware that her daughter is just as attached to him as she thought she’d be.

When she sees Hope with her father, her heart does that weird tumble. And it’s loud…louder than its ever been quite honestly.

―

She needs a break from it all. From all the normalcy that is her life.

So, she goes to a bar. There’s dancing and music and sweaty college kids behaving like animals all around her. And she looks back to see a couple sharing a smoke in the corner, and she remembers for a brief moment, that once upon a time, that was her.

Careless and young and so fucking in love.

“So this is where you’re hiding,” a voice sneaks up behind her, and she’s not surprised to see Klaus Mikaelson, of all people, offering her a glass of cold water.

“I’m not hiding,” she begins, sounding already drunk enough to pass out. “I’m getting a drink, flirting with…what’s your name again?” she points to the bartender, looking rather confused.

He rolls his eyes as he cleans a glass. “Marcel,” he reminds her.

“Oh right!” she exclaims, taking another big sip of her beer.

Klaus sees the bartender making eyes at her. He’s never been one to tolerate anyone hitting on Hayley. Even after all this time, the mere fact that another man was even looking at her still managed to get under his skin.

Call him possessive, if you must. Either way, someone should really consider naming a pathological condition after him.

“Hands off mate,” Klaus orders Marcel. “She’s married,” he sings, pointing to the big fat diamond on her ring finger.

“Do you have to ruin my fun?” Hayley sighs. “I wasn’t gunna sleep with him,” she specifies, and her head unintentionally (intentionally?) falls on his shoulder.

He can tell she’s doing pretty bad, other wise, she wouldn’t dare let her guard down around him. “You’re wasted,” he says. “What’s wrong? Is marriage not all it’s cracked up to be?” Klaus wonders.

Her jaw tightens slightly before she answers him.

“You’ll be happy to know that my life is pretty dull right now,” she mumbles softly, nuzzling her head into the fabric of his sweater. It smelled so…familiar. Of smoke and strawberries and the boy she used to love.

“After all that commotion at your wedding, you’re still…unhappy?” He asks, sounding like a total pest.

She doesn’t need to be reminded that her life is a string of unfortunate events, leading up to absolute nothingness.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been happy, to be honest,” she admits.

He centers his gaze on her eyes, the way she looks up at him is almost too reminiscent of before.

“C’mon now, that’s not true,” Klaus attempts to console her. “I’ve seen the way you smile at your daughter, you don’t call that happiness?” he mentions.

“And look at where I am now,” she meets his match, frowning. “I’m a shit mom,” she realizes.

It takes every ounce of self control in him to stop himself from kissing her. To stop himself from holding her in his chest and telling her that everything’s gunna be okay. “Now, I don’t know much about parenting love, but I do know that you’ve raised Hope to be a smart, strong, and independent little girl,” he says instead. “And last I checked, ‘shit moms’ don’t do that,” he offers, with a small laugh.

And she wants to tell him that she’s relieved to hear that from him. That his opinion matters to her the most because he’s turning out to be a not-so-shit dad. That’s more than she’s ever wanted from him.

“Marcel, another round of shots?” Hayley orders, while avoiding Klaus’ gaze.

(Maybe she’ll tell him those things some other time).

―

She falls asleep in his couch, listening to old music and the sound of pouring rain.

He’s always going to be there. Whether she wants him, whether she doesn’t want him. He’s always going to protect her. And she was going to have to accept that, at some point in her life. Otherwise, he’d just keep coming back to her, right when she needs him most.

(It’s not really a secret or anything, but she’s going to keep this thought to herself; she likes having him around).

―

And she wakes up to the smell of pancakes, of chocolate chip muffins, of coffee and cigarettes.

“Breakfast?” he tells her, like it’s the most obvious thing.

She shakes his blanket off of her and joins him in the kitchen. “Since when do you cook?” Hayley questions.

“I took lessons a few years ago,” Klaus informs her. “I figured if I’d be living on my own, I might as well learn how to feed myself,” he smiles.

It hits her right then and there, that this is the first time he’s ever cooked anything for her. Back when they were together, their breakfasts consisted of beer and weed. And now, here he is, a chef in the making.

“You’ve changed a lot, since before,” she mentions.

“My dear,” he calls her, like she’s his. “We must all grow up someday,” Klaus says, serving her some pancakes.

Hayley takes her time to observe his environment. His bachelor’s pad is a total mancave. With clothes hanging over chairs, and scribbled phone numbers from random girls on his fridge, she guesses that some things remain the same.

“I’m sorry,” she suddenly confesses. “For not telling you about Hope, I never apologized for doing that to you,” Hayley goes on to say.

“It’s alright sweetheart,” he assures her. “After all, I was a different man back then,” he honestly says.

“I just didn’t think this could ever be us, you know? I mean, you in the kitchen, making breakfast? Us having a peaceful meal together? This feels like a joke,” her hands are unsteady as she speaks, shaking uncontrollably while she struggles to rationalize their current situation.

“I know,” he finally breaks the silence. “We weren’t good for each other before, but now―”

“Klaus,” she cuts him off. “No, it’s too late for that now,” she says, after taking exactly seven breaths before rejecting him, once again.

He doesn’t back down though, not after he’s come so far.

“Just hear me out,” Klaus stammers. “If five, ten, even twenty years from now, if you decide you want to try things again,” he stops when he notices a small tear rolling down one side of her face.

She might not be as brilliant with words as he is, but this was her life. And, as charming as he is, she wasn’t going to let anyone else control it.

“Do you know how ridiculous you sound?” Hayley exclaims. “I’m married, to your brother no less,” she reminds him.

“But you’re not happy,” he points out. “And maybe I can’t be half as noble as ‘Lijah but I’ll be damned if I went down without a fight,” his tone is strong and resilient. He’s been waiting long enough, silently and from a distance.

This time, he thinks, he’s going to win her back. Even if he has to come out of it covered in claw marks. She’s going to be his.

“Thank you for the offer,” she says before leaving.

And she vows that this is the last time she’d allow him to get so close to her heart.

―

[the-elf-mahat]

Saera

A little home in a secret grove in Ashenvale. Midnight.

Jaoyn walked slowly past the threshold, a nervous smile on his face. "H-hello!"  He waved to the woman standing at the door. "I'm Jaoyn. J-Jaoyn Arcticwind..."

Elinde folded her arms, studying him, her stern gaze betraying nothing. "So you're the one," she said at last, speaking Darnassian. "The thief said you'd be here. At least you're prompt."

Jaoyn offered a bow of his head, "I am, I am, I am..."  Still smiling, he looked down at himself. "Something amiss, Miss... Elinde?"

"Elinde Starsong. Sergeant, if you want to be precise, and I do recommend precision." Her eyebrow quirked upwards. "You're very different than her last one."

Straightening once more, Jaoyn gave a quick tug to his shirt. "How is that, Sergeant Starsong?  She has mentioned John to me before, though I am curious what you... think."

Elinde clicked her tongue, a slight scowl furrowing her brow. "Brusque. Rude. Impatient. Foolish. Bullheaded. In a word--human." She shook her head in distaste. "You seem to have manners, at least. And you have yet to pin me to a wall and threaten to carve me to bits and mail me to my loved ones in separate boxes, as he did, so you've cleared that very low bar of first impressions."

Jaoyn's hand rested on his chin as his gaze turned to the ground. "That sounds like some introduction..." With a quick shake of his head, he continued, "No, no, Sergeant Starsong, I am too old to do such things as that. I care deeply, not only for Mahat but for her little one as well. I'd much rather see no harm come to them, and by extension, to you." Now he nodded, "It is an honour to meet you, and thank you deeply for having me."

"...hm." A muscle in Elinde's cheek twitched at the mention of Mahat's name, but her posture relaxed somewhat, her guard dropping a fraction. "Well. I think little enough of that one, but I will say that she isn't a fool and she wants what's best for the child. If she thinks it's best that you meet her... she is Saera's mother, and she'll have her way. However," Her eyes narrowed, glinting. "Should you prove unworthy of either her trust or mine, or should any harm come to the child... I trust I do not have to make up some profanity-laden threat, yes? We understand one another."

Jaoyn's expression faltered. "Trust me, should harm ever come to the child--" He stopped himself as his fist balled for a brief moment, only to come back to a smile. "I am sure you will find me worthy,” he said quietly, shuffling his satchel over his shoulder with a smile as he pored over the room. "I promised Mahat that I would protect little Saera... no matter what. May I ask where she is?"

The barest hint of a smile crept onto the woman's lips at his reaction. She gestured toward the doorway. "Out back, in the garden. Follow me, I'll take you to her."

"I brought something for her, a toy. Would you want to look it over, Sergeant Starsong?  Before I give it to her?" Jaoyn asked, motioning to his bag as they walked.

Elinde shook her head, leading him briskly along the garden path. "I trust your intentions, for the present moment. I will be observing the visit, however, from a discrete distance."

Jaoyn nodded in agreement. And suddenly they had arrived.

The child playing in the garden had pale skin, violet in the light of the elven forest, but perhaps it would pass for a human shade of pink in bright sunlight. She was around six years old, small for her age and a bit fragile-seeming, though her limbs and cheeks were still pudgy with baby fat. Her hair was long and dark, messy black curls tumbling over her shoulders, swaying as she turned her head towards the interruption.

The moment Jaoyn saw the little one, his own child-like eagerness came over him. A hand lofted high into the air, waving manically as he called out, "Greetings, Miss Saera! I'm Jaoyn!" His walk towards her slowed as his body slumped and lowered, approaching the child with more of a squat, certain to not loom over her.

Saera's silver-grey eyes went wide as Jaoyn approached, and she shivered a little bit, snatching up the stuffed rabbit that was sitting beside her in the dirt and holding it tight to her chest. "H-hello Mister Jaoyn," she mumbled, casting her gaze to the ground as her cheeks colored. "It'sverynicetomeetyouAuntEllysaidyouwerecoming." Her voice was sweet and fluting, and though she spoke quickly in her nervousness, her Darnassian was flawless.

Now on his knees beside her, but not too close, Jaoyn's grin was massive and infectious as he returned the conversation in the same tongue. "Why, the pleasure is truly mine." Reaching into his pack, he produced a tiny green rag-doll. Lifting it in front of his face, his ears danced behind him as his long digits manipulated the limbs, causing the toy to wave to the girl. "Hello there, Master Saera! How are you today?" Jaoyn spoke for the doll in a high-pitched, endlessly silly tone, moving the other limb to look as though the creature were scratching its chin.

Saera giggled, though she still clutched her rabbit and glanced nervously up at her aunt. Elinde gave the girl a nod and an encouraging smile, before retreating to a bench at the edge of the garden. Not close enough that she could discern what they said, though still able to pick up tones of voice, and with a clear line of sight to the pair. The Sentinel picked up a small volume and began to read.

Jaoyn lifted his head up to reveal himself once more, "This is Paedru, a faithful friend hoping to find a new home." The green doll nodded quickly as Jaoyn moved his lips again, now back in his goofy intonation, "That's right, Master Saera! Why, I love to do all sorts of things, like explore and go on adventures..." The Kaldorei leaned the toy forward conspiritorially, "Even go to tea parties!" It motioned back to Jaoyn. "But don't tell this big goof! He hates tea... says it makes his tumbly all rumbly."

"Hello Paedru..." Saera whispered, reaching out to take the doll's small hand and shake it politely. "I'm Saera Errence. This is my friend Ham..." She raised the bunny's stuffed paw and pressed it to the doll's hand in another shake. "He isn't very good at meeting new people, so sometimes I talk for him and say what he's thinking... he likes tea a lot though. Especially when it has cimma--cinnamons in it." She nodded matter-of-factly, her confidence seeming to grow a bit.

Jaoyn sat up a bit, smiling brightly. "Is that so?"  he asked in his own, warm voice. "Mind if I ask what it is you like to do for fun?" Nodding once again, Paedru placed a hand on its hip, as Jaoyn did his best to make its head swivel to and fro. "Yeah Master Saera, we want to play with you!"

She giggled softly again. "I'm not a master... that's what little boys are called, and I'm a girl," she said decisively. "Ham and I were talking about going on adventure. To, um, the thousand needles. A thousand is ten hundreds."

Jaoyn's ears darted up in surprise. "Yeah... yes, it is... you are a brilliant little girl."  Shaking back and forth to speak, Paedru asked, "What are little girls called? Er... Lady?!  Are you Master Lady Saera?"

The child giggled again, reaching out to poke Paedru in the stomach. "I'm not a Lady either! Mum says I will be when I grow up because Da was a Lord..." She trailed off, tucking her hair behind her ear. Previously hidden beneath her mass of curls, it was decidedly long and pointy. "I don't think I want to be a Lady though... Mum says they don't get to go on very many adventures…"

Jaoyn tilted his head with a grin, "That... that is true. Most fancy Ladies do sit about putting on their war make-up, trying their best to organize sneak attacks upon the gentlemen. You don't want that... you should be out climbin’ and jumpin' and swimming." Falling back onto his rear, his ears jovially flopped about as Paedru rested at his feet. "So... a Thousand Needles? Have you ever been, Saera?"

She shook her head, curls flying, loosening her grip on Ham a bit as she relaxed. "No, I never went... Aunt Elly doesn't like to travel very much. But I used to go places all the time, with Mum and Da... we lived in space! In, in Shatterath. I saw all the planets in the sky and everything, and we went to--lots of places." Frowning now, she rubbed the ratty fur of Ham's ears. "Aunt Elly said you are my Mum's friend, Mister Jaoyn. Is that true?"

The elven man was unable to keep his grin silly, turning genuine as the memories of his beloved flooded back. "I am, Saera, that I most certainly am." Still holding Paedru, he looked up to the little girl. "Why do you ask?"

Saera turned away, a charmingly obvious attempt at little-girl slyness. "Do you think she's pretty?" she asked, pretending very hard that she wasn't deeply interested in the answer.

Jaoyn flushed slightly darker blue, looking down as that child-like innocence melted a confession from him. "I think Mahat is the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on. More than any woman, more than any feature of this land or any other. To me, your mother is worth a thousand sunsets and a million cloud-covered mountains." He chuckled softly as he shook his head, knowing he'd already fallen into the little one's trap. "Why do you ask, Saera?"

Instead of answering, she giggled again, blushing fiercely and hugging her rabbit tight to her chest. "Do you loooove her?"

He solemnly mimicked the child, holding the rag-doll to his chest as he darkened in hue. "With every breath in my body, all of my heart and soul do I love her."

Saera beamed, letting out a contented sigh. "Oh, I'm glad. I miss her and Da all the time, but I have Aunt Elly who loves me, and Ham, and Ebari, and all the Edunes, and Mum doesn't have any of them so I think she must be lonely. And sad. She's always sad now, even when she pretends she isn't to make me happy, so I pretend I'm happy but it makes me sad..." She trailed off again, looking at the ground. Just for a moment, before she perked up a tad. "But you love her, and think she is pretty, so she must be happy now... is Mum happy?"

Jaoyn motioned for her to come a bit closer. "Honestly?" His voice dropped to a whisper as though this was the highest of secrets. Saera nodded gravely and scooched closer on her knees, bending her small frame towards his.

"She is incredibly happy right now.  She does have her moments, bad days, angry conversations, or ouches.  And she does always miss you deeply... but she is very happy."

Saera sat back on her heels, nodding in satisfaction. "I thought so. You're nice. And funny. She should be happy because you love her." A thought seemed to strike her, and she tilted her head to the side in an uncanny resemblance of Mahat's customary gesture. "Um... you must speak Common, right? Because Mum doesn't like talking elfy…"

Jaoyn grinned with a quick wink. "I am a bit like your Mother in that degree. I prefer Common, but if you are happy with Darnassian, that is how we shall speak.  Besides!"  He proclaimed as a lone hand rose into the air, waving grandly to indicate the whole garden. "I am a guest in your house, Saera."

The girl's eyes went wide and she shook her head, glancing over at where Elinde was calmly reading. "Aunt Elly likes talkin' in Darnassian better, but I like Common more." She switched languages fluidly, her Common containing the barest trace of a northern burr and a slight, strange musicality--a mixture of her parents' accents that was entirely her own.

Jaoyn gladly followed suit as the language changed. "It was how your auntie was raised. We are all different... and where I lived, Common was what every person spoke. Or at least most." Looking about, he still smiled. "So, an adventure to A Thousand Needles, huh? Have you been there since the water came in? I spent some time down there myself... always thought it was such a neat place." He leaned in slowly with a grin. "I was told those giant boulders atop the pillars are called Hoodoos. I loved that word... Hoodoos... makes me happy sayin' it."

"Hoodoos..." she mimicked him, deepening her voice slightly, sending her into another fit of giggles. "That is a funny word, Mister Jaoyn. Um. Did you like all of the needles, when you went to there? Was it very hot? Aunt Elly says there's no trees, is that true? How can somewhere have no trees?" Her brow scrunched in confusion.

He let go of the doll to lift his hands as he spoke, his voice reveling in his own excitement and amazement at the place. "None!" he exclaimed as his ears darted skyward. "It used to be the bottom of a sea bed. They called the one place without the needles 'Salt Flats'!" His hands spread out over the ground, "See, when the walls caved in and the sea was cut off, the salt water seeped into the ground." Looking up at her, he grinned. "And you see, plants don't grow from salt. Salt just sucks the moisture out of anything around it." His cheeks caved in as his eyes crossed and he made a slurping noise. Saera practically cackled with gleeful amusement, and he gave a pleased nod before continuing, "So... with the ground full of salt, roots can't get no water. Only the hardiest can even try, but most were just little ferns growing out of the rocks. Or higher up, there were cactuseseseseseses... but on the ground, no plants... it was really neat! Now though... the water is back. So it's like a giant lake with a bunch o' fingers jettin' out of it." All ten of the warrior's scarred and marred fingers pointed skyward as he tried his best to show the hoodoos fighting against the tide.

Saera listened in rapt attention, gasping and giggling at the dramatic reenactment. "Um, um, where did the water go when it went away? And why did it come back? And, and Aunt Elly says we have salt inside us and water too, how come we don't get all dried up? I know it's true because when I cry and it gets in my mouth it tastes like salt." She nodded assuredly, Ham now strewn haphazardly across her lap.

"Well... the water seeped into the ground. Without the ocean to keep feeding it, the ground eventually swallowed it because of the little holes in the rock, and the hot sun evaporating water. And no one really knows why it came back... I think it used to be open to the sea, but then something happened to close it off. Before Deathwing returned and broke down the wall." He grabbed at his chest in an exaggerated motion. "As for the salt in us, we actually need that. Helps our muscles move... and without it we'd get all stiff and couldn't do anything. It is just a bit of salt, unlike what settled into the ground, which was a massive amount." Nodding quickly, he picked up Paedru again and nodded the toy's head as well. "Too much of anything is never good."

Saera flexed her frail arm, staring at it with a frown, like she was trying to feel the salt inside her. "Sometimes I eat too much ice cream and I don't feel good... even though I reallyreally like ice cream and I feel good while I'm eatin' it... is it like that?"

Jaoyn tapped his nose with a bright nod, "Exactly like that..." Patting his stomach, he leaned back. "I know Paedru told you, but that is how I get with tea. I really love it... but..." He sighed with a heavy shrug, looking down. "So... if you ever drank salt water like from ocean, it would really dry you out quick, even though you were drinking water!" He nodded in punctuation, raising his gaze once more. "You are one brilliant little girl. What is it you want to do when you grow up?"

"Be a knight," she answered quickly, then paused, frowning. "Um, or maybe a archmage. Aunt Elly's a Sentinel but they aren't allowed to have very much fun, and Da said being a paladin was like that too. Lots and lots of rules." She wrinkled her nose and stuck out her tongue. "When I grow up I don't want anybody to be the boss of me except for me."

Jaoyn beamed brightly as he nodded furiously. "That is how I lived Saera… or at least, I tried to become a Sentinel. But... you know..." His eyes rolled back into his head as he spoke sarcastically, "'No boys allowed!'”

"That's dumb, and not fair," Saera agreed, bobbing her small head. "Some boys are almost as smart and brave as girls!"

Jaoyn chuckled softly. “Aye, so they are. Since I had to be my own boss of me, I decided to do what I could for those around me. The tough part is, though... that people start to depend on you. They don't become your boss, but you... want those people around you to be happy." His massive hand patted Paedru's head as his ears lowered. "Like your mother, she don't need to answer to no one! But she does everything she can to keep you, and me, safe. And sometimes that changes what she'd choose to do. But you know what?" he asked as though it were a secret, "It makes her happy. And I bet it would make you happy too."

The child's eyes narrowed into a thoughtful squint, the gesture another echo of Mahat. "It makes Mum happy to have to follow the rules?"

Jaoyn tilted his head to and fro, clearly mulling over his next words. "Mm... kind of... have you ever had to repair Sir Ham?  Accidentally ripped him?"

Saera pulled the toy rabbit closer to her, pointing out small, hidden stitches at the joint of his arm, and one of his ears. "Mum fixed him for me…"

The man beamed brightly. "And didn't you play with him gently when he got hurt? Took him to your mum as quickly as possible? During that time, you could still play with him, but you didn't because you wanted Sir Ham to get better. So you gave him to Mother and now Sir Ham is better than ever! That is kind of what your Mother does for you and me. It makes her happy to help other people, because they will be happy and she will be happy." One of his ears raised quizzically. "Make sense?"

Slowly, Saera's puzzled look faded. "Because, um... helping people makes you more happy than getting to do what you want all the time always?"

Jaoyn waggled his hand side to side. "Kind of... kind of... but more that... you making something for someone else makes them happy, and you are happy because they are. Have you ever made anything for your Mother or Aunt?"

"Oh, lots!" She bounced slightly, her eyes bright with excitement. "I make necklaceses from beads and flowers an' I draw pictures an' one time I wove a whole potholder that Aunt Elly uses all the time!"

The warrior gasped, sharing in the childlike excitement. "But that kind of sounds like work!  But you were happy to see them happy?"

Saera pursed her lips in a frown. "No it isn't! Work is borin', like schoolbooks or chores. Makin' things is fun!"

Jaoyn couldn't help but chuckle as his head shook, "Then you keep having fun, but don't you skip on your studies. If you do want to become an all-powerful archmage one day you'll need to read lots. Then come back and explain to me how they make those iced-port-holes and arcana-balls."

The girl let out a heartfelt groan at the mention of studying, flopping back to the dirt dramatically. "Mebbe I don't wanna be a mage then! I'll be a, a adventurer--like Harrison Jones! His books are fun!" She clambered upright again, seemingly unaware or uncaring of the grass and dirt now caught in her wild mane of curls. "Do you like reading, Mister Jaoyn?"

He frowned deeply as his ears wilted. "No, Saera... I'm not fond of it either. I never learned to read Common or Darnassian so well. But I did learn... eventually, from reading all sorts of stories. And all neat kinds of information... like those that your Mister Jones wrote. He actually went to all those places to learn about the past and write it down for others."

"I wanna go all those places too," she said decisively. Her expression turned to one of tender concern as her companion frowned, and she scrambled closer to him, putting her small hand on his knee. "Are you all right, Mister Jaoyn? If you wanna you can borrow my books--um, the ones I've already read. But you hafta promise to not drop them in soup, because one time Ebari dropped my book in her soup and it got all messed up and sticky and I got really mad."

Jaoyn couldn't help but smile softly at the girl's determination to cheer him up. "Oh, it is nothing, Saera. I am honestly just amazed by you, and a bit sad I have to go soon. It is pretty late... for me... and I am just having too much fun. But I am tired... and I have my own chores to do." He leaned in and whispered, "Don't tell your mum, but I've been doing all the cleaning when she isn't lookin'. Makes her think she is goin' crazy, and I laugh, and laugh, and laugh."

Saera held her fist to her mouth, giggling quietly. "She's funny when she doesn't know what's goin' on. Her face gets all--" She scrunched her cheeks in a passable imitation of a confused Mahat. "An', an' she goes 'wha' in th' bloody hells?' an' then she tells me I's not s'posed ta say bloody or hells yet." She looked wistfully sad for a moment. "...not 'I's'. I'm. I'm not s'posed to say..." She pulled Ham to her chest once more. "Will you visit again, Mister Jaoyn?"

The man offered up Paedru with a small nod. "Yes, but I worry about Sir Paedru here. Would you mind if he stayed and played with you and Sir Ham until I come back?"

Saera nodded eagerly, drawing the doll close to her right beside Ham. "Um. Yes. We would like that very much, um... Ham needs somebody to practice his song with."

Jaoyn lifted his ears with a bright smile. "You sing too?  That is wonderful... when I come back I shall ask you for a song!"  A spot of weariness took his eyes, and he extended a hand to hers. "Shall we head back inside before I go?"

She shifted the stuffed toys to be held in one arm as she got to her feet, nodding. Then, impulsively, she swept past the outstretched hand and gave him a tight, single-armed hug. She pulled back, bobbing her head again, pulling her curls forward over her face to hide the blush in her cheeks. "Um. That was for Mum. When you see her. I miss her lots."

He returned the hug gently, nodding. "Don't you worry. I'm going to hug her extra, extra tight for you."  Standing now, his body craned over to offer the tiny child two fingers.  She took his hand delicately, and led the giant man back along the garden path to the quiet house.

(( Thanks as always to Jaoyn’s player for letting me borrow his words to turn our RPs into these little stories. ))