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I could never be an influencer because I don't stay on top of the latest tech and this is the quality of video I end up with 😂
#oh sorry you wanted to see details?#my samsung galaxy s9 is choke-laughing as it struggles to hold a charge#fun fact i got this phone the same week i got Mav#its nearly due to be replaced#maybe one day soon ill be able to post a phone photo or video that isnt this crunchy
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finished (please reblog that one!)
don't know shit about this fandom but my friend showed me the youtube videos and i was like oooooo… i have no idea what kinger looks like.
anywho; sketches. will probably clean these up & color properly at some point bc jax got so stretched that he is approximately 3 pixels now. but until then i figured i'd just put it out here bc i have to do college instead of drawing now!
#lychee's trash art#tadc#the amazing digital circus#tadc gangle#tadc zooble#tadc ragatha#tadc pomni#tadc jax#tadc fanart#probably won't make any more but who knows; you never know#have not really posted as of late but oh god the world is burning and i'm going to fail so yay#side tangent but in my head pomni is soooo filipino and i can't explain why;;;;#if there's elements of other people's designs sorry i just kinda scroll and absorb sometimes#if anyone sees this yell at me if you want credit and i'll take your word for it#i'm queuing this at three am as per usual... if this wasnt scuffed id be worried to miss something#y'know the Critical Detail. always happens man.#(3am = the only time left to draw if i'm lucky)#tadc human
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isat pokemon au, my liege?
my rambling in tags
#my art#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#pokemon#siffrin#mirabelle#isabeau#odile#bonnie#i am not individually tagging pokemon sorry. floragato eevee ursaring scorbunny meowstic <- for anyone who does not know them#im personally a big fan of when artists mold pokemon designs like clay to fit their characters so i tried to channel that#siffrin really does have the perfect mystery dungeon backstory. washes up on a beach with no memories of their past type of deal yknow#i imagine that he was still a sprigatito then? and evolves at some point during their journey? dont ask me for details i dont know them#veryy tempting to make him an absol but ive already seen that done very well!! so i kept most of these to floragato sif#mirabelle being an eevee is suuuch low hanging fruit sorry. i could not resist the evolving pokemon not wanting to evolve trope#i was concerned that sif was no longer shortest party member until i realized they just stand on their back legs all the time to feel talle#when quadruped like mira he is still shortest. sorry siffrin#isa gave me such a hard time. like i never thought i would turn a character into ursaring of all things but it really was the best choice#my other choices were bewear or pawmot if you care. he’s so bear coded#if going purely based on looks i probably would have made odile a sneasler. but i wanted her to be psychic#ill be honest bonnie was purely vibes. they carry the treasure bag :)#never draw bonnie's hat in profile worst mistake of my life#loop is still cat shaped here but i’ve seen the idea of them changing species thrown around. much to think about#i like the idea of the party seeing sif and loop side by side and immediately clocking their entire deal#the change god is mew btw. very important information to no one but myself#eurasie as hisuian zoroark?? lots of hair. and the king can be darkrai#don’t mind the inconsistencies. me and my 2781 ways of drawing the same character#wait what does an eevee look like again. googles it. oh i really crabbed this one up#uhh. looks around. been sitting on this one for a bit too long i think. maybe ill clean up some more sketches later
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Merry Christmas guyyyss🎄
#merry christmas beautiful people#hope you're enjoying it as much as these two#let's admit tess cannot bake#she's learning in jackson but joel is still the one doing do cooking#as u can see it's for her own safety#oh and the first one? well it's up to you what happened there#u know it's funny how i always forget to draw some detail i really wanted to add and then remember a week later with OHHHH WHY#im wondering... what it is this time :D#i miss christmas... they are not what they used to be and im “forced” to spend them at work wearing shitty clothes my boss wants#i swear one more thing and im not only quitting my job but also attacking my employer#just kidding but f@*k bartending#sorry but its been a lot#tess servopoulos#joel miller#joel x tess#tess tlou#joel tlou#tessjoel#tess lives#why is it always end of the tags where i unleash this?
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-(click for a better quality!)
#ah.. first of all! I made these two arts “to be done”. there is no lore or anything(at least for now....OQBZKAVZJVWJZVS)#and I wanted to test how I make/draw blood!#It had been a long time since I had made a drawing that contained blood.#so I had this idea (in this case. the arts you see there) in my head and I did it!#oh. and I also wanted to put the colors a little inverted. as you can see-#I did omori. normal. black and white. with BLOOD-colored blood (not pink. but RED)#and then I made sunny. with his colors but also with the touch of red and the blood in black mixed a little with the white/gray!#what did you think!? It was a good idea!?!!? Well.. if yes or even no. I still hope you enjoyed! :DD#(and sorry for not making the knife very visible..#I focused too much on the blood and forgot to add more detail to the knife- so.. sorry. ok!?)#omori omori#omori sunny#sunny omori#omori fandom#hi omori fandom!!#(I forgot to say this before :'])#omori fanart#omori#i'm mel and this is my blog✌️#my art blog#art#my art#my art <3#art mel#my art style#fanart#tw bl0od#tw blood
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Hi hi!!!! I saw your sizzy HCs and I would love it if you did TMI gang HCs for the future when they have kids and all💗 How do they all interact with their kids/each other’s kids? That ask about Jace’s kids made me laugh I feel like his kids would have a jar for him to put money in whenever he’s too cocky, kinda like New Girl with Schmidt
simon and izzy are the go-to babysitter couple of the bunch for sure, given that they aren't running an institute or, you know, the entire clave. they're also the most likely to have a movie or game night, which the kids absolutely love
because the cousins span over a decade in ages, there seems to always be a baby to hold, and clary is always the first one to reach for them (followed by alec)
jace is stricter as a father than might be expected. not in a harsh way, but in a protective way. in a 'i want you to learn how best protect yourself and your family' way. he's definitely a teacher, in a very physical way, and loves spending time in the training room with his kids and niblings (not that this makes him any more mature or less ridiculous at his core hehe)
creativity and expression are very well supported by all members of the tmi gang, and their children develop a good amount of confidence when it comes to being themselves and not necessarily folding into shadowhunter (or warlock) norms
magnus loves taking the kids on adventures and showing them things they might never have gotten to see if they didn't have a very powerful warlock for an uncle, but he is also very protective, moreso than some of the other parents. he's seen too many people die to knowingly bear witness to human/shadowhunter recklessness in these kids he cares so much for
alec is the first one to suggest they let rafe go out on patrol, not without alec ofc. that first patrol is a fun one. jace is there too. he's muchhh less strict with his niblings than he is with his own kids, and he tends to treat them much more like how he treats kit. hence the fun hehe rafe has a blast, and the whole time alec's anxiety is through the roof.
all the cousins are scared of izzy's cooking. even if she's gotten better as the years have gone on, their parents have ingrained in them too much fear for the food she makes not to be wary when she holds out a wooden spoon with a questionable substance on it. usually the kids ask for pizza. or a delivery of chinese food (like parents like kids hehe)
#there were so many characters here my brain started short circuiting and wanting to go into too much detail lol#i reallyyyy need to know if we're ever gonna know the clace/sizzy kids or at least how many of them there are#bc it will be so much easier to map out hcs around this whole family#like i could tell you what i want to believe but i could very well be wrong without knowing it and see that scares me so#but!!! if we want more please lmk!! i'm always up to go deeper <33 i really just didn't want this post to get impossibly long#also so sorry this took so long <3 it's been a crazy few weeks#asks#headcanon#tsc#the shadowhunter chronicles#tmi#the mortal instruments#tmi gang#oh!! and i'm glad you appreciated my sizzy hcs hehe#also i wish i had seen new girls so i could get your reference!! but i'm sure it's on point <3
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halloween thing i drew for an art trade with @cherry-207 ! she asked for edgar and scri dressed as angel and devil . you can see her part here !
edgar vargas belongs to jhonen vasquez
scriabin belongs to @zarla-s
#hello . uhhhhhhhhhhh#UHHH WAIT WAIT I CAN EXPLAIN I SWEAR#i know i haven't posted a thing since like A MONTH AND I'M SORRY BUT i have a really nice excuse for this . yes .#right after posting devi's drawing my mom BROKE HER FOOT ?? WOAH !#and idk maybe i was sad or . stressed because i had to do a bunch of things my mom used to take care of and it was really stressing#this + school stuff + a drawing a day + some other things pretty much started killing me#and suddenly i was getting hives every single day after 11.30pm . yeah . it was TERRIBLE#so uh . i had to stop doing some stuff for my own wellbeing . like . drawing . for example#but it worked !#now i just have a bunch of mosquito bites on my hands . they seem to like them .#OH SO well um YEAH DRAWING#an art trade with one of my friends !!!! drawing this was honestly so fun#as you can see this is from october 25th . but i wanted to wait for brusk to finish her piece before posting it#te quedó precioso emily . valió totalmente la pena la espera . tqm#edgar's costume looked so boring next to scriabin's#he looked way prettier with wings but if i wanted to add them i would have to erase 90% of scriabin and he came out so pretty to do that#so . instead of making him wear something pretty and detailed like scri's costume i had to make him wear something you could see and think#“ oh yeah that's an angel ”#i explained this to brusk after showing her the drawing and she said#“ if you think about it . him having a traditional costume fits his character "#and i was like OH#ACTUALLY YEAH THAT'S COOL#anyways i really like this one . the colors are so pretty . i finally found a way to make my colors warm and pretty .#WELL UH THAT'S TOO MANY TAGS BYE#vargas#zarla s#vargas zarla#scriabin vargas#edgar vargas#sunny's art
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Been feeling a little melancholy about Nova today—I'd expected to be playing her for a long time, but now she's just an OC floating around in my brain without a home. Staring at all the art I've had commissioned/friends have made of her hasn't exactly helped, but it is a reminder of how much I love her. My special little lonely gnome 💙
Art by @batwynn @rek @paperzombiie and @strangearte
#personal#nova#undescribed#sorry I don't have the brain to describe All Of These#the art is actually in chronological order and you can see the development of her design#(shout out to my partner for letting me insist on tiny detail changes for the portrait of that last one until she finally felt Right)#oh tian sorry for not asking permission before posting yours if you want me to delete it I will np 👍
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So so indebted to u for posting those lovely illustrations from Cyrano <333 & even more so for yr tags!! I'm completely in love w yr analysis, please feel free to ramble as long as u wish! Browsing through yr Cyrano de Bergerac tag has given me glimpses of so many adaptations & translations I'd never heard of before! I'll be watching the Solès version next, which I have only discovered today through u ^_^ As for translations, have u read many/all of them? I've only encountered the Renauld & Burgess translations in the wild, & I was curious to hear yr translation thoughts that they might guide my decision on which one I buy first (not necessarily Renauld or Burgess ofc). Have a splendid day & sorry for the likespam! 💙
Sorry for the delay. Don't mind the likespam, I'm glad you enjoyed my tags about Cyrano, and that they could contribute a bit to a further appreciation of the play. I loved it a lot, I got obsessed with it for months. It's always nice to know other people deeply love too that which is loved haha I hope you enjoy the Solès version, it may well be my favourite one!
About translations, I'm touched you're asking me, but I don't really know whether mine is the best opinion to ask. I have read... four or five English translations iirc, the ones I could find online, and I do (and especially did, back when I was reading them) have a lot of opinions about them. However, nor English nor French are my first languages (they are third and fourth respectively, so not even close). I just read and compare translations because that's one of my favourite things to do.
The fact is that no translation is perfect, of course. I barely remember Renauld's, but I think it was quite literal; that's good for understanding the basics of the text, concepts and characters, but form is subject, and there's always something that escapes too literal translations. Thomas and Guillemard's if I recall correctly is similar to Hooker's in cadence. It had some beautiful fragments, some I preferred over Hooker's, but overall I think to recall I liked Hooker's more. If memory serves, Hooker's was the most traditionally poetic and beautiful in my opinion. Burgess' is a whole different thing, with its perks and drawbacks.
Something noticeable in the other translations is that they are too... "epic". They do well the poetic, sorrowful, grief stricken, crushed by regrets aspects of Cyrano and the play in general, but they fall quite short in the funny and even pathetic aspects, and that too is key in Cyrano, both character and play. Given the characteristics of both languages, following the cadence of the French too literally, with those long verses, makes an English version sound far too solemn at times when the French text isn't. Thus Burgess changes the very cadence of the text, adapting it more to the English language. This translation is the one that best sets the different moods in the play, and as I said before form is subject, and that too is key: after all, the poetic aspect of Cyrano is as much true as his angry facet and his goofy one. If Cyrano isn't funny he isn't Cyrano, just as he wouldn't be Cyrano without his devotion to Roxane or his insecurities; Cyrano is who he is precisely because he has all these facets, because one side covers the other, because one trait is born from another, because one facet is used as weapon to protect the others, like a game of mirrors and smoke. We see them at different points through the play, often converging. Burgess' enhances that. He plays with the language itself in form and musicality, with words and absences, with truths masking other truths, with things stated but untold, much like Cyrano does. And the stage directions, poetic and with literary value in their own right in a way that reminded me of Valle Inclán and Oscar Wilde, interact with the text at times in an almost metatextual dimension that enhances that bond Cyrano has with words, giving them a sort of liminal air and strengthening that constant in the play: that words both conceal and unveil Cyrano, that in words he hides and words give him away.
But not all is good, at all. Unlike Hooker, Burgess reads to me as not entirely understanding every facet of the characters, and as if he didn't even like the play all that much, as if he had a bit of a disdainful attitude towards it, and found it too mushy. Which I can understand, but then why do you translate it? In my opinion the Burgess' translation does well bending English to transmit the different moods the French text does, and does pretty well understanding the more solemn, cool, funny, angry, poetic aspects of Cyrano, but less so his devotion, vulnerability, insecurities and his pathetism. It doesn't seem to get Roxane at all, how similar she is to Cyrano, nor why she has so many admirers. It does a very poor job at understanding Christian and his value, and writes him off as stupid imo. While I enjoyed the language aspect of the Burgess translation, I remember being quite angry at certain points reading it because of what it did to the characters and some changes he introduces. I think he did something very questionable with Le Bret and Castel-Jaloux, and I remember being incensed because of Roxane at times (for instance, she doesn't go to Arras in his version, which is a key scene to show just how much fire Roxane has, and that establishes several parallels with Cyrano, in attitude and words, but even in act since she does a bit what Cyrano later does with the nuns in the last act), and being very angry at several choices about Christian too. While not explicitly stated, I think the McAvoy production and the musical both follow this translation, because they too introduce these changes, and they make Christian as a character, and to an extent the entire play, not make sense.
For instance, once such change is that Christian is afraid that Roxane will be cultured (McAvoy's version has that infamous "shit"/"fuck" that I detest), when in the original French it's literally the opposite. He is not afraid she will be cultured, he is afraid she won't, because he does love and appreciate and admires those aspects of her, as he appreciates and admires them in Cyrano. That's key! Just as Cyrano longs to have what Christian has, Christian wants the same! That words escape him doesn't mean he doesn't understand or appreciate them. The dynamics make no sense without this aspect, and Burgess (and the productions that directly or indirectly follow him) constantly erases this core trait of Christian.
Another key moment of Christian Burgess butchers is the scene in Arras in which Christian discovers the truth. Burgess writes their discussion masterfully in form, it's both funny and poignant, but it falls short in concept: when Cyrano tells him the whole discussion about who does Roxane love and what will happen, what they'll do, is academic because they're both going to die, Christian states that dying is his role now. This destroys entirely the thing with Christian wanting Roxane to have the right to know, and the freedom to choose, or to refuse them both. As much as Cyrano proclaims his love for truth and not mincing words even in the face of authority, Cyrano is constantly drunk on lies and mirages, masks and metaphors. It's Christian who wants it all to end, the one who wants real things, the one who wants to risk his own happiness for the chance of his friend's, as well as for the woman he loves to stop living in a lie. That is a very interesting aspect of Christian, and another aspect in which he is written as both paralleling and contrasting Cyrano. It's interesting from a moral perspective and how that works with the characters, but it's also interesting from a conceptual point of view, both in text and metatextually: what they hold most dear, what they most want, what most fulfills them, what they most fear, their different approaches to life, but also metatextually another instance of that tears/blood motif and its ramifications constant through the whole text. Erasing that climatic decision and making him just simply suicidal erases those aspects of Christian and his place in the Christian/Cyrano/Roxane dynamic, all for plain superficial angst, that perhaps hits more in the moment, but holds less meaning.
Being more literal, and more solemn, Hooker's translation (or any of the others, but Hooker's seems to love the characters and understand them) doesn't make these conceptual mistakes. Now, would I not recommend reading Burgess' translation? I can't also say that. I had a lot of fun reading it, despite the occasional anger and indignation haha Would I recommend buying it? I recommend you give an eye to it first, if you're tempted and can initially only buy one.
You can read Burgess' translation entirely in archive.com. You can also find online the complete translations of Renauld, Hooker and Thomas and Guillemard. I also found a fifth one, iirc, but I can't recall it right now (I could give a look). You could read them before choosing, or read your favourite scenes and fragments in the different translations, and choose the one in which you like them better. That's often what I do.
Edit: I've checked to make sure and Roxane does appear in Arras in the translation. It's in the introduction in which it is stated that she doesn't appear in the production for which the translation was made. The conceptualisation of Roxane I criticise and that in my opinion is constant through the text does stay, though.
#I have a lot of opinions about translations in general tbh but this is not a semi clear case like in Crime and Punishment#in which there's one detail that a translation must do for me to recommend it (it used to be the one but now in English several do it)#I wouldn't recommend Burgess as a first approach to the play‚ but having already read the play and knowing the text and characters#and how Burgess may modify it‚ then I wouldn't not recommend it because it is the best in form in many aspects#And while he fails in direct concept‚so to speak‚ form is particularly important in this play and in conveying concept and characterisatio#So idk personal taste is it I guess? Again I am not an English or French native#I vehemently recommend reading the play in French if you can and haven't done so already#Even best if you want a translation to read the translation alongside the French text#to see how the translation bends the play in form and subject#Anyway... Sorry for the long delay and the too long reply. I always end up talking too much#Oh by the way I think I saw you talk about the blood/tears motif in the act IV in some tags? It's not just act IV#The tears/soul motif is repeated through the entire text linked to Cyrano and is opposed to the body of Christian#That's why the culmination in the last act and the tears in the fourth hit so much#Like the constant of Cyrano being linked to the moon and the darkness while Roxane is the sun and the light#And also I would argue the 'pearled perfection of her smile' is not an unidentifiable trait or intangible#It's poetic and metaphoric but it's a description of her teeth. Small‚ straight‚ white. Perfect teeth. That wasn't so common back then#It's quite common in classic literature to find poetic references of good teeth spoken of in these terms#Anyway...#I hope you'll find some use in this that would make the insufferable wall of text worth some of the time at least#After all time spent is a little death. I would have hated to kill a fragment of you for nothing haha#Cyrano de Bergerac#Did I tag asks? I usually delete them after a while so I think I didn't? I never recall#I talk too much#That will suffice#Hmmm it's useless in any case. I think I've talked for over twenty tags before tagging that#A wall of text and somehow I ramble in the tags nonetheless ugh#I will reread this in a bit to see if it's coherent enough. The little screen of the phone always makes me lose track of things when I writ
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Me drawing someone else’s selfship for them: ohhh nooo what if I mischaracterize their f/o or self insert.. what if I accidentally highlight a feature on their self insert they are insecure about.. what if.. !!!
Me receiving art of my selfship by others: EATING IT FOREVER SCRUMPTIOUS A+++ WORK I ADORE IT
#SORRY THE SOCIAL ANXIETY GOES CRAZAYY#for the record this is part of the reason I don’t do gift art very often!#I prefer art trades most of the time bc we can be a bit more formal about explaining details we want included in the art we’re trading for!#like someone can tell me: oh my s/i has freckles and I’ll go okay gotcha I’ll add that!!#I also like commissions for this reason. if that makes sense!#gifts it’s like. I wanna surprise you. but I wanna check and see the specifics of what you’d like to see in my art for you.#but I want to surprise you. but I-#you understand.
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you’ve probably already read it before, but the poem Party by Kim Addonizio really got me tonight. first thought was “oh man. yeah” and then my second thought was “how can i make this about my hockey guys somehow………..”anyway! have a good one!
oh. oh.
#don’t think i’ve read this kim addonizio poem and it just blindsided me like a truck thank you so much#i. oh god. like yeah.#pour me shitfaced into your car i feel like you own a comforter extremely dysfunctional only in surface details like which person was the#black hole and the distant spark in space that might’ve been a star there’s something too with unrelenting mist / many-headed mist / missed#who knew mis(t)/sed had undone so many. while you keep an eye on the burner here’s hoping this flame doesn’t go out#the flame as in the spark as in don’t let me have pinned my hopes on you to watch it burn out again but also me. like please let me not go#and i think there’s something there too with the repetitive ‘i have just met you’ and i already love you that reminds me both of a story#colman domingo told abt meeting his partner i cry everytime i hear it right when he says ‘i think i love u &you’re about to change my life’#and i KNOW there’s another poem. and i feel like it maybe has a dog and it talks about how they don’t even know you but they love you#OH IT’S ALSO. OH MY GOD THAT’S IT. i mean not exactly so maybe i have read this before & it’s what has been haunting me for so long but#the opening line to tim seibles naïve is ‘i love you but i don’t know you’ - mennonite woman#the odds of that dog poem being a carl phillips poem is non-zero btw. his poems about dogs make me see shrimp colors (bertuzzi thesis)#ANYWAY. agreed. this is incredibly hockey and incredibly hurtful because they DO bond like this in 0.0001 seconds because if you can’t#you’re fucked. you have to just find somebody and fall in love with them and it’s the salmon and the triple cream brie like they got taken#out to some fancy meet the donors team night in their suits and one of them is dealing with a heartbreak and a trade and are the things#they think true or are they just missing what the used to have. jamie who used to empty and refill the ice tray YES sorry i have been a#little bit thinking that about the trevor dealing so poorly with the breakup and i wish i had another narrative (which i do) but it fits#trade deadline tragedy#and also the formation of a codependent rookies like. two guys that get drafted and brought up together and suddenly they’re doing#everything together and it’s your first time in the big show and none of your old college friends understand because they’re not there#and you can’t get it. like you think you know but they can’t understand and the loneliness and it IS guys taking care of each other#(alexa play harriet by hey rosetta! but specifically the bridge) and it’s just. i just!!! trying to fill up the missing pieces of your life#like i cannot convey WHOMST i am trying to pin this narrative to this is going to rotate for a long while i think#because it’s not a wild i fell in love with you at first sight it’s a you were kind to me when i was broken. and i love you for that.#like who is FALLING APART &happens to fall into someone else’s arms. purely for the partygirl aspect the devil (old hrpf) says ‘13 bennguin#who among us hasn’t fallen mildly briefly brilliantly in love with a stranger and imagined a future where you get everything you want#sometimes we love people for who they are and sometimes we love them for what we’re not and sometimes for who we think they’ll be#this was a very long way to say thank you for sharing <3 i will also be making this about my hockey guys <3#OH MY GOD IT’S DPAIRS. WHO’S BEEN THROUGH SEVERAL DPAIRS#nonny <3
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I think the hardest thing in writing for me sometimes is the like “show don’t tell/let people communicate through subtext/Normal People don’t just walk around openly explaining their motivations for everything That’s Unnatural” thing because like.. I literally DO walk around openly explaining my motivations for everything, that is how I talk, I am an analytical detail oriented over-communicator who explains everything as thoroughly as possible and and will give a fully detailed 2 minute long answer to something simple like “how are you doing today?” .. like it’s hard to make things sound Natural and Normal when you yourself are inherently unnatural and abnormal in your methods of communication to an extent lol
#''hey. whats up? you look kind of sad.. is something wrong?'' normal answer (apparently how people are supposed to talk): *looks away#remosefully and stares into the distance* ''n-no.. I'm fine. don't worry about it.'' abnormal answer (how I would respond): ''Yeah I#'m mostly fine. I was just thinking about what the future is going to be like 30 years from now and if I'll ever actually accomplish anythin#g that I want to. which makes me feel X way for XYZ reason. you see because I had a dream last night that made me think of *continues to exp#lain my exact emotional state and inner thought process completely matter of factly in exact detail for 5 more minutes*#tfw you would be a badly written character if you existed in a story lol#This is also why I struggle making conflict because most conflicts can be resolved through conversation and I personally love to have long#detailed conversations about everything. Like literally I don't have hardly any conflicts interpersonally because if something happens it's#immediately followed up with like ''hey sorry if my tone of voice sounded a bit pointed or harsh. when you were talking to me I was trying#to balance all the stuff I was taking up the stairs and also my leg hurts so I think all my mental energy was being used there and I just#didn't feel like talking. I should have just said 'wait a minute and we can discuss it inside' instead of trying to end the conversation qui#ckly in a short rude way.' ''oh yeah thats fine. I thought it was something like that. sorry for hounding you about the topic as well. i#havent eaten in a while so I think I'm just a bit prickly at the moment. we should both rest for a while and destress from the store#trip and then talk about it later. maybe after lunch?' 'sure. sounds good.' like LITERALLY. lol#it is so hard for me to write characters who are bad communicators or don't understand their own internal states or arent constantly#analyzing their own actions to understand what they do/don't feel and why and what the cause of it is and etc. etc. etc.#I just naturally want everyone to perfectly undertsand everything and communicate amazingly and have complete self awareness and#logical presence of mind gjhbj.. which like.. of course comes across as unnatyural and also those type of people rarely ever get involved in#conflict and conflict is APPARENTLY what drives stories (even though I don't like most conflicts and just want to resolve them lol) so ...aa#I mean you can get around this to some degree by the fact that (at least in my opinion) no rule for dialogue is 100%. dialogue is good if it#sounds naturally like it comes from the character who said it. It can be meandering and pointless and rambly IF that matches the character.#it can be dry and overly self aware IF your character is that way and it suits them. So like throwing in a few detached scholar types or lik#e '5000 year old cave dwelling hermit' type people is good for me and works BUT the thing is an ENTIRE cast of characters can't be that way.#at some point - even in a setting where everyone is reserved and academic (like a research camp in the wilderness full of scholars and stuff#) still SOMEBODY has to be the one who's conflict prone and doesn't pristinely understand all of their emotions and etc. etc. Because statis#tically that is still literally the majority. Kind of like my tendency to make everyone 100% aromantic and asexul when it's like.. YES.. may#be 2 or 3 or even 4 out of 10 of them could be that way. but like.. an entire group? a diverse group of 10 people from all walks of life and#EVERY single one is like that??? hgjh . you have to add realistic variety#As much as I'm pro 'have more stories where sex or romance are literally NOT involved at all in any capacity since it's already oversaturate#d in media' I'm also dedicated to realism. alas. (at least as realistic as you can get in a fantasy setting lol)
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had a trainwreck of an in person consult for my sleeve tattoo yesterday only made better by the itty bitty yorkie shop dog adoring me and sitting on my lap the whole time.
#also chatting with my partner after ofc i felt so much better tysm chris ♥#but yeah it was not great#it was supposed to be on friday#but she changed it last minute saying she was too busy can we do it the next day at 5 instead? yeah fine#kinda disappointing she didn't tell me in time to like do smth with friends i was invited to but had to opt out of bc of the consult#but whatever#get there early text her that i'm there. stand out side. in the rain. for 15 minutes. she didn't see the text. she didn't see me outside.#in fact.. she was in the middle of tattooing somebody. the client noticed me after 15 minutes and finally let her know.#she comes over all suspicious like. cracks the door and asks 'who are you?what do you want'#even after i say i have a consultation at 5 she didn't remember it was HER who had the consult. i had to rattle off all the details for her#to finally remember it was HER consult and say 'oh i completely forgot about that'#finally get let in and sit down and. she then spends the next couple minutes profusely apologizing to the other client. saying like#'ohhh im so sorry i completely forgot i had a consult scheduled.... i'll get this over with quick' which. well. :(#finally start going through it. she doesn't remember anything about the tattoo. not that it was a sleeve. not what elements were in it. :(#i wasn't expecting a sketch or anything but. even just having re-read the emails before the consult would have... been nice....#after she does that she says 'oh we didn't really need an in person consultation' which is also. :( because she suggested it.#i get a whole like 5 minutes to rehash stuff we already went over in emails including her not remembering i'd put down a deposit AND we had#3 sessions scheduled already.... and it needs another 2 sessions which i wish she'd told me about because she's booked so far out my last#session might not be until. may.#i didn't even get to ask any questions! i wanted to ask! like does she use saniderm? (i can't have that on my skin)#does she want other things for a tip than just cash? (absolutely not offering that now) has she dealt with KP before? are there any things#she wants me to bring to the sessions? (they're gonna be long)#and then i'm rushed out the door and sitting in my car in the rain and just absolutely fucking crushed#and feeling bad that i feel so bad because like. is it entitled of me to think that like.#maybe if u have a client paying u thousands of dollars to design & tattoo their sleeve tattoos.... you'd like.... treat them like a client#i was so excited about my sleeve i was so fucking psyched and now im. not. at all.#i'm worried about what if she forgets about my appts? what if she books over my appts like she already did with just my consult?#and i'm left hanging trying to get things scheduled in so so so so late like i'm some second rate flaky walk in....#i guess it could have gone worse
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unrelated to that lmfao
i love being not (insert religions based on the kings and their people as ''demons'') but being adjacent to the communities while knowing the kings on a personal level because oh boy
#like i wont get into the Chrxstian God And The Kings' ''Fall'' rumour i did the other day but things like that and like#posts being like ''oh they love everyone all of us each of us'' and talking about The Lore of down there thats like. so clearly#twisted to be pro-(kings) propaganda and im like oh my god. if you worship them BECAUSE of these details you think are right then#im so fucking sorry they are way more complex and grey-moral than this#- i have to be clear. i do not know anything anyone says is false if its their worldview. Im not sitting here laughing because i think othe#s are Dumbdumb and cant get across the kings as Flawlessly as me uwu or some shit im explicitly talking about people saying#definitively that the chrxstian god did xyz thing and the kings are poor little meow meows and love everyone while also saying they#dont love everyone bc they vehemently disagree with chrxstians and stuff like. ''('demons') are actually the Pure sacred race theyre all#old gods theyre all pro-human and would never hurt a practitioner'' that type of stuff im like. ahhhhhhhh. so youve heard the propaganda#bc lets be real here i do NOT doubt any of these people's abilities its not my place so i dont even do it quietly to myself. very rarely#yes but like 1% of the time and its only when a bunch of red flags pop up but like. there are so many people on the kings' plane that#are telling humans these things bc......... well look at the goetic demons. royalty and people in power. who do people mainly go#to for demonolatry? The people in their society we understand to be kings. princes. dukes and duchesses. are they all these things? no#like Duke Vepar isnt a Duke lmfao i know her personally like she'll present like that but. imagine if that race wanted to talk to people of#our plane but only spoke to the english king/queen and dukes and duchesses and marquis and war generals and stuff to ask about#their civilisations. do you think that theyd get an unbiased view of the monarchy and the english religion and whatnot........#edit: so like we're really clear. its like seeing people brainwashed by fucked up politics bc. it is that.#sometimes you just have to laugh bc like god youre in deep and im so sorry#insert my ex (a spirit) lying to me and convincing me he was a video game character for five years like what else can you do but laugh#ramblings //
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sorry for seeing one negative thing about a thing i like an then being annoyed about it for the rest of my life it's just like that sometimes
#and usually it's like. one thing.#and i see that one person doesn't like the thing i like and i am internally dying#like#if i could erase every memory of every post that was like ''actually here's how this kid show sucks and a few minor design elements make it#irredeemable despite the fact that quite a lot of it had good morals and decent storytelling''#like. usually they are not wrong about the flaws#but girl. just because the characters don't have that much variety doesn't actually mean that the show is like. the worst thing ever#it just means that the show has major/minor flaws and then you can choose to look past those. or you can not#but i mean. obviously there are egregious things like ''this is literally intended to be hateful towards a minority/plant such beliefs''#but when it's unintentional things/small details especially ones that are a product of its time#like maybe don't simplify it down to ''show horrible and irredeemable because they made a few jokes i didn't like''#(especially when like. the jokes are like. the kind of jokes in every single cartoon of that decade)#maybe just move on and don't do that i guess#idk i am vauging because i see things that are like ''sorry x is horrible and you can't like it. and also a few fans of this bothered me#so i'll just say something rude and overgeneralizing like 'oh man it's funny how every single fan of x media is like this and they all suck#'''#sorry for complaining but rrrgh#brain is filled with angry little worms that want to kill#vent maybe
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oooooo I hate it when adults can't act like adults
#pobre payasito#ESPECIALLY around kids#like no. that twelve year old DOESNT want to hear about your emotional baggage.#stop fucking telling them.#no. that fifteen year old is NOT a therapist and you should NOT be twlling them about how much you want to off youself.#no. i promise they dont. yes you are causing them great emotional distress. see a fucking therapist or something#'oh boo hoo now youve made me feel bad i knew it im such a buden :(( nobody cares about me waaaa'#fucking tough. youre an adult that can work through your own problems without talking to a child like that.#this is really personal and theres a lot more nuance to this. i know depression is hard and its shitty and#its not always as simple as 'just go to therapy'. i know.#but oh my fucking god. Do Not CONSTANTLY TELL A CHILD. IN DETAIL. AS AN ADULT. about how bad you are.#udhhdfjkd sorry about this i needed to rant. pls ignore 😔
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