#oh shit I forgot to post about how I’m really into the billy the kid and rodeo ballets

[ame-in-the-rain]

Girlie I need like a video essay about classical music like aaron Copland and I just stare at me screen like

[yikesharringrove]

He doesn’t know why, but he’s laying down.

It’s the first thing he realizes. A stupid thing to notice, but just one minute ago, he was standing behind the counter at Family Video, and now he’s laying down.

His eyes are heavy, and it feels like it takes a huge amount of effort just to open them.

He’s in a fucking hospital.

He knows from the stupid white color of the stupid drop ceiling tiles. From the stupid annoying beeping of the stupid heart monitor. From the stupid scratchy gown he’s wearing instead of his sweater.

He heard a muttered curse next to him, and slowly lolled his head over to look.

Hopper was sitting next to his bed, his hat balanced on his knee, looking grumpily at the crossword printed on the back of The Hawkins Post. Steve wanted to laugh at the image, the chief of police swearing as he scribbled out something.

“How the fuck am I supposed to know that? Nobody knows what the fuck that is.”

“Blame Nancy,” Steve croaked. His head throbbed and he closed his eyes again. “She convinced them to add that. Said sales would go up.”

There was a rustling of paper.

“Smart girl,” Hopper said. He paused for a moment, and Steve felt like he needed someone to come and crowbar his eyes open or they would stay closed forever.

“You collapsed. Scared the shit out of your girlfriend, and everyone else at the video store.”

“Not my girlfriend,” Steve mumbled.

So that makes sense, why he was at work one second, and in a lousy bed at Hawkins General the next.

“You didn’t hit your head. Hargrove caught you before you went all the way down.”

Jesus, Billy’s reflexes really are something else. Steve’s gonna need to thank him for that. The last fucking thing he needs is another concussion. Maybe, to show his gratitude, he’ll suck Billy’s-

“I’m here because we need to talk about what the doctors found in your system.”

Steve’s mind went blank, and his eyes flew open.

Hopper was looking at him, his face an unfamiliar mix of sad, and angry, and fucking, disappointed.

Steve felt like he could vomit.

“They ran your blood. Routine E.R. shit, I’m told. But they found some, some substances that shouldn’t be there.”

Steve swallowed down the lump in his throat.

He knew the guilt was written all over his face.

“How long?”

“Since the summer.” He couldn’t look at Hop in the face. Not while he admitted this shit.

He was fucking stupid to think he wouldn’t be caught.

It’s a miracle Robin hasn’t walked in on him doing bumps in the bathroom at work, or Billy hasn’t found his stash tucked between the mattress and the box spring.

Hopper sighed.

“I know we all went through a lot last summer. With your friend getting trapped in the Upside Down, and you getting captured-”

“Tortured. I got tortured.”

Hopper sighed again.

“Getting coked up isn’t going to help anything.”

“What is this? Fucking Family Ties?”

He felt Hopper’s glare more than he actually saw it.

“It’s stupid-”

“You just don’t get it! Okay?” He really didn’t mean to yell, his head just fucking hurts and he’s so fucking stupid.

“Oh yeah,” Hopper snarked. “I fucking forgot. You’re the only person in the goddamn world that’s ever dealt with fucking drug addiction. So sorry.”

“I’m not addicted!” Lie.

“I don’t fucking believe you.”

Steve glared at Hopper.

“So, what? You’re here to arrest me?”

“No. I’m here to talk some fucking sense into you.” He shifted in his chair, the newspaper slid off his lap and fell on the floor. “You’re around those kids all the time. You fucking drive them around. You have been endangering their lives for months. And why? Because you can’t handle the trauma? We all have trauma. You think your friend Hargrove is totally fine after being stuck in that place? After realizing some fucked up doppelgänger was killing people? You think your girlfriend is totally fine after being tortured by the Russians too?”

“I don’t do it when I have to drive the kids, Hop I swear.” That, was the truth. “Okay, the other stuff, I get your point, but I need you to know, I wouldn’t hurt the kids like that, I-” the heart monitor was speeding up, getting louder in Steve’s panic. “You have to believe me, I’ve never driven them high.”

“Okay, okay. I believe you.” Hopper sighed again. “Just, why?”

Steve gulped.

“The Russians, they drugged us. They said it would make us tell them the truth. And I don’t know what it was, but fuck. It felt good. I couldn’t feel the pain, and I wasn’t scared, and I just. I didn’t know how to stop being scared.”

It was embarrassing.

Admitting that he’s been scared shitless ever since that first demogorgon dropped through the Byers’ ceiling.

Admitting he’s been doing lines of coke to keep himself from spiraling into inconsolable panic.

“I did some at a party, and it was the closest I felt to that feeling.”

Not technically true. He and Billy did some together last August, and it was like the fearlessness washed over Steve in warm waves.

But he can’t throw Billy under the bus like that.

And if Billy ever found out, that one night of drug experimentation between lovers turned into a full-on addiction, he’d never forgive himself.

There was a pause.

“Have you been snorting or shooting?”

“Snorting.”

“Okay,” Hopper stood up, stretching his arms above his head and placing his hat back on. “I’m going to tell your friends what’s going on. Not the kids, just Hargrove and Buckley. Joyce, too. Then, when you get out of here, you and I are going to clean out any stashes you’ve got. And we’re all going to be watching you like a fucking hawk.”

“Wait,” Steve croaked, his heart rate jumping up again, the beeping speeding up. “Don’t tell Billy.” Hopper shot Steve a look that said really? “Let me tell him. He needs to hear it from me.”

Hopper paused, on hand on the doorknob.

“Did he get you hooked? Is he on it too?”

“No! Nothing like that. Please? He’ll be upset unless I tell him.”

Hopper gave him a look that was a little too searching to be comfortable.

“Okay. Okay, kid. I’ll send him in. But he’ll know what’s going on one way or another. Don’t make me tell him that you’ve lied. Don’t think he’d appreciate it.”

He left the room without another word, leaving Steve to stew in his shame.

He’s such an idiot.

Why did he ever think he could get away with this and not one person would notice?

Even if they didn’t know he was regularly doing cocaine, Billy and Robin already knew something was up. They kept asking him if he was okay, coming over for impromptu sleepover parties. It was nice, he loves them both, but it was only a matter of time before the penny dropped.

It’s just embarrassing. That a routine blood test exposed the amount of uppers in his system. Exposed how little he’s dealing.

He rolled over, waiting for Billy to come into the room and blame himself for Steve’s stupidity. He didn’t want that.

Billy didn’t have a drug problem. He thought it’d be fun for them to get a little high and do stuff together. And it was! It was so fun, and they’d talked about doing it again.

Steve can kiss that idea goodbye.

He wouldn’t be surprised if Billy started following him into the bathroom to make sure he wasn’t doing anything he shouldn’t be.

It’s sweet, that his boyfriend cares so much about him that he would, hypothetically at least, do that.

But Billy’s got enough on his plate, and if Steve knows anything about him, it’s that he blames himself for shit just as much as Steve does.

He focused on the steady beeping of the heart monitor. Still elevated, his nerves for the coming conversation getting the best of him.

His head was pounding in a way that said it was time for his next fix.

He squeezed his eyes closed, willing away the need thrumming under his skin.

“So, you finally gonna tell me why you’ve been actin’ all squirrelly lately?”

[mimymomo]

In ‘Lucas on the Line,’ Lucas Sinclair experienced countless bouts of racism and micro aggressions including but not limited to:

Had children run away from him and refuse to touch him because they thought his Black skin color would rub off on them. This happened IN THE THIRD GRADE! And he never told his parents about it!

Calmed his anxiety about being the only Black kid in his homeroom class by coming to the realization that since there was no other Black kids that meant he most likely wouldn’t be bombed

Had to install a camera in his locker because his property got defaced by a glitter bomb

Lost his first and only black friend/mentor who supported him thanks to an ACTUAL MAKESHIFT BOMB being installed in his locker that caused a janitor to go to the hospital for 1st/2nd degree burns (and the white boy who did it barely got punished)

Got teased that the only reason he got on the basketball team was because he was Black

Comes to the realization that he might’ve actually only gotten in the team because the coach has a history of recruiting Black boys for the team regardless of their skill level

Gets called an Oreo (for uneducated: white on the inside, black on the outside) by racist bullies. Erica (who apparently has also been called this) sticks up for him and is the only one who understands what the insult means which means Mike and Dustin don’t know/understand the lengths of how deep the racism Lucas experiences in Hawkins on a daily bases

And these aren’t even all of them! These are just examples I had from the top of my head!

And despite all this happening in the book, “fans” have STILL FOUND A WAY to turn this book about Lucas and his struggles as a Black boy in a mostly white suburban town and his deteriorating relationship with Max and make it about Byler!

The fact that Lucas, one of the only characters of color on this show, can’t have ANYTHING to himself without people using him to push their ships is so aggravating!

He and Erica constantly get shit talked and miss characterized by fans, get excluded/cut out of group shots, and barely get any fanart/fics about them and their struggles compared to the white characters (I could make a whole new post about the terrible way this fandom treats Erica but I won’t do that here). Hell don’t forget that the fandom constantly tries to dispute the racism Lucas received in S2 from Billy was either not really racism, just a moment that Duffer Bros. put in to “ruin” Billy’s character and ultimately can be tossed out and ignored.

The only time I ever see Lucas get any large amount of attention is either due to 1) Lumax (but let’s be honest: 90% of the lumax tag on here isn’t even about them and has now become Elumax 2.0 and most post are people praising ElMax and then being like “oh Lucas/lumax is cute too” in the tags and that’s it). 2) people creating “parallels” of Lumax to their ship of choice (mostly Byler and Mileven) as a way to say that their ship is gonna be canon or 3) to say that he’s bisexual.

And all that is fine and whatever, ship and headcanon things to your hearts content, but if you only care about Lucas if he’s helping push you ship narrative or because you think he’s gay (to the point where some people actually read snippets of the book that talked about Lucas coming to the realization that Black boys like him can be considered attractive and only acknowledge the “queer” reading of the text and completely ignored the big race element that was the main focus), I’m sorry but, that’s not cool. The fact that 95% of the Lucas Sinclair tag isn’t about Lucas himself but white characters like Steve, Eddie, Byler says everything about how the fandom treats him.

I’m just so tired.

Lucas Sinclair deserves the same respect that the white characters get!

I leave you one of my favorite sections of the entire book: Lucas learning to become unabashedly himself:

Rant over.

Edit: in my blind rage I realized I forgot to edit out the Twitter handle. That’s completely my fault. Please don’t hate that Twitter user. I’m just coming back to fix that.

[urcuteharrington]

hi, I just saw your post asking for some requests. Maybe if you can do a Steve angst but with a little bit of fluff? 💛💛

forgotten?☁️🕊

summary-steve seemed to have forgotten you when nancy came into the picture

word count-1.8k

warnings-fighting and cursing

a/n-i really hope you guys enjoyed this because it took me so long to write but i appreciate you all and i’m so glad to be back 🤍

masterlist

huge thanks to @angsty-plots for giving me ideas for new angst plots<3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

steve and i were good friends that was until he started dating nancy wheeler. it use to be steve and i doing everything together hanging out at each others houses, long car rides , going to tommy’s parties , and now he forgot all about me. i knew steve had a crush on ever since the beginning... i saw the way he looked at her when she would walk past him , i saw the sparkle in his eyes when he talked about her or whenever she was around. it use to be steve, tommy, carol, and i hanging out at lunch everyday but i was soon replaced when steve asked nancy to go to his house for a hangout with carol and tommy since his parents were out of town. that night he only invited me out of pity and i saw the subtitle flirting between the two and it made me sick. i walked barb that night to the bathroom after she sliced her thumb trying to open a beer can.” i know steve has gauze and bandages somewhere here ill look just keep your hand under the water” i tell her. that night i saw nancy and steve go into his room and i knew what was going to happen and i couldn’t bare being their for it. I said my goodbye to barb wishing her a safe ride home and went on my way. remembering that night i cried my heart out wondering why steve never expressed interest in me.

That was months ago now it’s around october and it was tommy’s halloween bash. i wasn’t going to go but i decided that it was better than sitting at home doing nothing. i knew i was going to see steve their with nancy but i still went even if it was going to hurt seeing my best friend who forgot i even existed. I go dressed up as (whatever you want) and grab my keys getting ready to head off to the party. pulling up to the house i already see drunk teens walking around with their heels in hand or wobbling around. i walk in and head over to the kitchen and try to grab a drink of spiked punch. while pouring i look over and see them... steve and nancy dancing to the beat of the music. a sudden wave of sadness hit and i decided to take a sip of the punch feeling the alcohol run down my throat.

minutes pass and i decided to stay in the kitchen since i felt like it was my best bet to not run into them while on the dance floor. watching the drunken teens flirting and stumbling their words amused on how quickly the punch could get someone drunk.then i saw her , the girl who stole my best friend from me and the boy i loved. nancy walked into the kitchen and grabbed more cups of the spiked punch , one after another i was able to see her get completely shitfaced in the ,mater of only a few minutes. steve came looking for nancy and they got into a fight and i watched intensely. watching as the punch spilled all over her while sweater my mouth opened a jar shocked at how messy everything was getting. watching her and steve storm over to the bathroom. moments later i move to the living room near the front door and suddenly get shouldered by steve who seemed furious and watching jonathan rush to the bathroom. i decided to stay a little longer since the party was still going strong.

a few days later i noticed that steve and nancy were slowly falling out since he wasn’t visiting her at school anymore and her and jonathan seemed to have gotten closer. they seemed to be done and whatever was said in that bathroom must have been bad. i decided to go to steve’s house and check up on him, even if we weren’t friends anymore i didnt want to see him go through something like a breakup alone. knocking on his front door i waited anxiously wondering if i was making the wrong choice. “ hey how can i- oh hi y/n. i didnt uh expect you to be here?” steve says opening the door confused. “ i know steve but i wanted to talk to you” i say as he walks me to his room to talk.” hey i was actually gonna go out and apologize to nancy so if you can come and help me pick something out for her” my heart sank i haven’t talked to him in months and he already brought her up. not a hey how are you or a i miss you nothing its always about her i think to myself. “ oh i actually came to talk to you about something “ “ shoot” he says.” why did you stop talking to me” silence filled the room 1...2...3 minutes passed waiting for him to say something anything” steve you left me for nancy and i dont get what i did for you to sto talking to me. i understand shes your girlfriend but shit i didnt think you’d completely forget about me” i say standing up from his bed looking at him with sadness in my eyes.” i-i thought you didn’t want to hang out with us anymore y/n i didnt notice at first i i’m so sorry” he says guilt in his voice.” i feel like i lost the only person i truly cared about and and you were my friend and now you don’t even look my way steve how could you not notice me not being their... how did you not notice me not their at your basketball games cheering you on or the long car rides we would have just blasting music or going to tommy’s parties and taking turns getting shit faced. tell me steve is it me was i just not who you wanted to be around anymore was she my replacement because i saw it since the beginning” chocking on my words i hold back my tears. i didnt want to cry but eventually it fell and my vision blurred with tears.” y/n i never ment to make you feel that way and i am so sorry i guess i just got so caught up in nancy and i didnt notice you slowly leave and i i just feel terrible “ steve looked at me finally realizing how much he affected me and how much pain he caused me. “steve if you didnt want to be friends anymore you could have just told me you really hurt me” i say to him not daring to look him in the eyes.”i-i” is all he could say” you know what steve a simple hey i dont think we should be friends anymore its not your fault i just think we should go our own ways would have been nice” i say to him walking past him” you know thanks for being my friend for so many years but i cant be friends with someone who doesn’t give two shits about me anymore” i say as i walk out the door and walk back home since it was only a few houses down.steve not moving just in shock realizing that he was the reason why he lost his best friend.

days past and steve found out that nancy liked jonathan and accepted it telling her its okay and like that they broke up. driving around i felt a wave of sadness hit when the song steve and i would listen to while blasting music. tears spill down my face as i drive home. once i make it home i calm myself down and wash up when i suddenly hear the doorbell go off. walking over i open the door seeing the infamous billy hargrove “ hey their doll face i was wondering if you’ve seen my little sister max i know that you tutor some of her friends so i was wondering if you could help me figure out where the byers house is” he says licking his lips seductively “ yeah i could take you their and help you look for your little sister just let me grab my stuff “ i say looking at him.” after getting to the byers house i stay in the car until i see steve walk out confused at why he is their. everything happened so fast punches were thrown and now i’m driving the kids to this random area in hawkins. steve wakes up and sees me driving confused at how he ended up in this situation. getting to the destination steve and i talk while the kids grab everything. in the car they explained everything that happened in thus far with el , will, the upsidown , and etc. “ we broke up” steve says looking at me “ what why are you okay” even if we weren’t close anymore i didnt want him to feel like he had no one. “ she likes jonathan and the night of the party she called our relationship bullshit and i accepted it since i-“ dustin cuts him off by yelling at him how we didnt have enough time.

getting the kids out of the tunnels one by one steve was just about to help me up when he grabbed onto me tightly in a protective matter when the demo dogs ran toward us. watching as they ran past us he told me” i lost you once and i’m not gonna lose you again”getting out of the tunnels i was able to fully process everything that happened and once el closed the gate and steve and i were finally alone he broke the silence “ i love you y/n i never ment to hurt you and i’m sorry.” speechless i sit their “ steve i know you loved nan-“ he cuts me off “ after our first fight i knew she loved jonathan and i guess i couldn’t believe it till she called our relationship bullshit and i love you so much y/n and it was stupid of me to not tell you earlier” “ i love you too steve but what you did hurt me i mean you completely forgot about me” “ i know y/n but could you give me a second chance i’ll make it up to you... could i take you on a date and patch everything up” i really didn’t want to forgive him but i couldn’t just abandon him because i needed him i loved him and he loved me “ i would love that steve “ i say looking at him with love in my eyes and a smile plastered on my face.

[avintagekiss24]

Home > Steve Rogers

|| pairing: 1940′s!steve rogers x black!reader

|| word count: 3,224

|| warnings: angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, mention of war, mention of Bucky’s death, canon divergence/canon adjacent

|| challenge: @cake-writes​ 1940′s challenge: “Loose lips sink ships”

|| square filled: @star-spangled-bingo​ 2020 O5: Steve’s Compass

|| note: I totally forgot about this challenge, lol. I signed up for it last year and it just totally slipped my mind until today. Which is why I’m posting so late (here in the US anyway) so I can make the due date of today, May 8th. This is canon adjacent? Canon Divergence? I don’t know, lol. All I know is it’s 1945 and Steve never crashes his plane. He goes home to get his girl. The timing might be a little off. I went off the MCU timeline, where he gets injected around 1939? When he’s around 21 years old.

The song reader is singing is Lover Man by Billie Holiday and her outfit is also inspired by Billie. I’m not sure of the gif credit, I got it from google. If you know, or if it’s yours, please let me know so I can credit you! Line credit once again goes to @writeyourmindaway​!

Brooklyn. 1945.

“The night is so cold and I’m so all alone. I’d give my soul just to call you my own.” 

You sway slowly as you croon into the microphone, the band playing behind you. You scan the small room, packed with bodies, all eyes on you as you sing. They sip on their drinks under the dim lights and there’s a low murmur from the people at the bar, but even they turn and lean against it to watch you, putting their orders on hold for just a few minutes. It’s still amazing to you - a transplant negro girl from Louisiana - having all these faces staring back at you, admiring you. Black faces, white faces, tan faces, it didn’t matter. They were all here for you.

The bar is a small one but word spread fast and within months, not a chair or table or stool could be found empty on a Friday or Saturday night when you were there. The cops don’t even really bother you or Sam, the owner and one of the first people to notice your talent, anymore. Some even stop by for a drink and a quick song. 

Your eyes flutter shut, “Got a moon above me but no one to love me. Lover man, oh, where can you be?” You hear the door creak open and close seconds later, but continue to sing, “I’ve heard it said that the thrill of romance can be like a heavenly dream. I got to bed with a prayer that you’ll make love to me.”

There’s a sudden commotion. You pop your eyes open, squinting as you try and make out the dark silhouettes in the corner. A few heads turn at the voices and loud shhhh’s ring out throughout the room. The noise dies away from the door, but the bodies are still crowded around - Jimmy, the bouncer, James “Rhodey” Rhodes, the bartender and maybe Sam, you can’t tell. In the center of them, a mess of blonde hair. 

----------

“Steve,” Sam whispers hard, “She doesn’t want you here, you know that.”

Steve’s shoulders slump a little as he takes a deep breath, “I haven’t seen her in six years.” He answers slowly, softly, “Please.”

Sam and Rhodey exchange glances before Sam takes a deep breath. He tosses his eyes back towards the stage to watch as you sing. Quick memories flash back to him from years before. Steve helping, well trying to help, set up the place when Sam first bought it. You and Steve slow dancing together in the middle of the empty floor. The three of you kicking back with ice cold Coca Cola’s, daydreaming about how big this place was going to be one day. 

He cuts his eyes back to the tall blonde in front of him. He didn’t believe it at first, when he saw a picture of him in the papers. The sickly, five foot something Brooklyn boy was now a towering six foot man. Rippling muscles, no lingering cough, a straight spine… this wasn’t the Steve Rogers that left for war. This is Captain America standing in front of him now. 

“Sam,” Steve starts, “Rhodey, you know me.” He pleads, “Please, just a minute of her time, that’s all I ask.”

Rhodey lets out a breath and throws his hand on his hip, “Just let the boy stay. He gets outta hand, Jimmy’ll throw him out.”

Steve cuts his eyes towards the burly Jimmy. He’s big, but he’s no match for the new, improved Steve Rogers, “I don’t want to hurt you, Jimmy.”

“Shit,” Jimmy swears under his breath, “I’ve read all about you. I don’t want you to hurt me neither.”

“One drink.” Sam warns, his eyes stern, “One drink and you gotta go. I don’t want her getting upset over the likes of you.”

Steve throws up his hands, “One drink.”

“You got it?” Sam asks, turning towards the soft-hearted Rhodey.

“I heard ‘ya. One drink, that’s it.”

Sam turns on his heel and moves off without another word. Rhodey waves Steve with him, walking back behind the bar to grab a tall glass, “Sip it slow, Rogers.”

Steve tips his head towards the older man and accepts the golden liquid that’s slid his way. He brings it to his lips and takes a small, slow sip as he turns to face the stage. His eyes soften immediately at the sight of you. You’re just as beautiful as he remembered, although, a little more grown up now. You’re in a black sequin, form fitting dress - low cut to expose your… one of his favorite parts of you. A large white flower is pushed into your hair and a small smile quirks onto his face. He used to love bringing you flowers. 

He closes his eyes so he can hear you, just like he used to. Suddenly, it’s 1935 again. The two of you, with Bucky pulling up the rear (only there for you and Steve’s protection), walk slowly home from school. They’d wait for you everyday, right around the corner of your school, and as soon as the two of you were out of eyeshot of anyone, he’d link his fingers with yours and kiss you right on your cheek. With your fingers laced together, your arms swinging gently, you’d sing some old song, one he’s never heard before, one you’d have to explain to him as an old southern spiritual. Bucky would always know the songs, but he wasn’t as sheltered as Steve. He was worldly already at seventeen. 

Steve lets out a slow breath as he lets the words of your song seep into him.

Strange as it seems

Someday we’ll meet and you’ll dry all my tears

Then whisper sweet little things in my ears

He has every intention of doing just that. 

----------

“A- huggin’ and a-kissin’, oh, what we’ve been missin’. Lover man, where can you be?”

You smile as the band finishes and the room erupts in applause for you. You thank the band, extending a hand of your own for them before you announce a short intermission for a quick smoke and a drink. Jimmy helps you off the stage and ushers you towards the bar, where you’re met with a large smile and a ready made Manhattan. 

“That was beautiful, doll.” Rhodey compliments, handing you a cigarette before striking a match, “Just beautiful.”

“You’re too kind,” you giggle as you lean forward, placing the cigarette to your lips for him to light, “I was a little flat.”

He waves you off, scoffing quickly, and gives you a wink before he moves to another patron. You take a drag of your cigarette and let out the smoke slowly before flicking the butt and bringing your drink to your lips. You hum lightly as the sweetened liquor slides down your throat and settles in your belly, giving you an instant warmth. You swear, you don’t care where you go, Rhodey makes the best damn Manhattan in all of New York. 

“You sounded amazing up there.”

You freeze as the voice sounds to your right. Your lips part as the familiar voice swirls around your brain, activating a part that you thought you had left behind. You turn towards the owner and gasp at the person staring back at you. You recognize most of him. His eyes, that wispy blonde hair that he used to sweep away from his forehead, those big ol’ ears. But, that strong jaw, the height, the thickness… you didn’t believe it then -  the stories, the pictures -  but God, you can’t deny it now. 

Doesn’t make you any less mad.

You drop your eyes back to the glass in front of you and take another drag of your cigarette, “Thank you.” You say flatly. 

“I always knew you’d make it one day.” Steve says softly, “I knew people would love you.”

“Not the right people apparently.” You snap back.

You close your eyes and rub your temple as the anger you buried six years before starts to resurface. You feel his eyes on you, those same blue eyes that you used to see your forever in. You turn back towards him, blinking quickly. You don’t say anything, you just stare at him while he stares back at you. Anger flashes through you again as he gives you those puppy dog eyes, trying to make you feel bad for him. 

“Why are you here?” You ask bluntly, “I told Sam I didn’t want you here.”

“I wanted to see you. I had to.”

“For what? Hmm? To spring something else on me, Steve? You have a wife? A kid on the way?”

He sighs as you practically scream at him, “It’s been six years, you can’t honestly still be this mad at me.”

“A lifetime could pass, and I still wouldn’t want to see your face.” You stand, grabbing your drink, “Give the Germans a message for me, hm? Tell them that if you’re still breathing, they aren’t doing their job so well.”

You turn and push through the crowd of bodies before he can say another word. You finish your set some hour or two later and stay behind for a little attention, after all, you are a single girl. You feel those eyes on you the entire while but you pay him no mind. You laugh, you flirt, you nuzzle in a little closer than you usually would - pull on a few ties. A twenty seven year old girl should be a wife. The man you thought would make you an honest woman decided war was the better option. 

It’s almost midnight before you decide to head home. It’s a nice night, the sky clear and full of bright stars, so you wave Sam off when he offers to walk you home. He insists, but you know this neighborhood like that back of your hand. You wouldn’t feel safer in any other place in the world. So, he wraps your fur scarf around your neck and sends you on your way with a quick kiss on the cheek and a smile. 

You’re not but ten steps away from the bar when you first notice the presence behind you. You stop to light another cigarette before you call out to him, “I don’t need you to follow me.”

“I’m gonna walk you home.”

“I don’t need you too.” You reinforce.

“I’m going to walk you home anyway. I’ll keep my distance, I promise.”

You sigh heavily. The persistence of him hasn’t changed and the pounding headache you have won’t let you argue. You walk slowly, taking in the fresh air and the calm night as the one and only Captain America follows you home. He keeps his distance, just like he promised. Once you climb the steps to your stoop, you turn again, watching as he stops at the bottom of the steps. 

“I’m home now, thank you.” You say flatly again, clearing your throat.

He nods gently, “My pleasure.”

You blink at him, your lips parting as words threaten to fall from them. You open your mouth wider, even inhale to begin to speak, but you can’t. The words just won’t come. The memories of your last night come flooding back to you - the screaming, the tears. If you walk out that door, don’t you ever think about coming back. Do you hear me, Steve? Don’t you ever come near me again!

Your eyes start to water at the thought. You have to turn your head away from him, you have to stare down the street to try and stop the tears from falling. It doesn’t work. You drop your head as a single tear slips down your cheek and splatters on your patent leather pumps. Your chin trembles as you glance back up towards the sky and hold your hand over your mouth.

“Let me make it up to you,” he says, his voice full of emotion, “I can fix it.”

“We had plans, Steve.”

“I know that,” he answers quickly, “You aren’t seeing anyone, are you?”

You scoff, crossing your arms over your chest, “Loose lips sink ships, Captain.”

He takes a deep breath, “I don’t really care if you or not. Let me fix it - I can fix it.”

“Fix it?” You shout as all of the pent up emotion you’ve held in for all these years comes pouring out onto your cheeks, “Fix it? How are you going to fix it? I’m just supposed to forget that you walked out on me? That you chose killing Germans over starting a life with me?”

“You don’t understand-”

“I don’t need to understand! You and Bucky both, you just -” 

Your words come to halt at the mention of his name. Steve drops his head as he swallows hard and has to close his eyes. Bucky’s mother didn’t even have a body to bury. You couldn’t breathe when you heard the news. His sister, Rebecca, came to tell you and you just… you hadn’t ever felt a pain like that. James Buchanan Barnes was good to you - loved you like you were one of his own. Not only had you lost the love of your life, you’d lost your best friend now too. 

You clear your throat, “You both just left. No warning, barely a goodbye and poof. Gone.”

“I thought about you everyday,” Steve says, his eyes still closed, “Every damn day. You were the only thing that kept me alive.”

You laugh sarcastically, “Don’t say that. I had nothing to do with keeping you alive, that shit you got pumped into you did.”

He shakes his head emphatically, “You kept my heart beating. That’s what I mean. I was fighting for you, and for Sam, and my mom and dad. I had a duty,” he stresses, his voice breaking under it, “You don’t understand what that meant to me, being able to fight.”

You roll your eyes but he continues anyway, “It had nothing to do with my love for you. I could have done it better, yes. I could’ve communicated with you better, yes, but it had nothing to do with how much I loved you. How much I love you even now… despite you wanting me dead.”

You sigh heavily as your words from earlier in the evening, “I didn’t - I didn’t mean that.” You answer softly.

He flashes a knowing smile, “Yeah you did.”

You roll your eyes again and shrug. You glance back down the street, sniffling softly as you hug yourself. You can’t lie to yourself, you are glad he made it home in one piece. You blink back at him, finding his big, wide, blue eyes on you still. He takes a step closer, resting his hand on the railing. He pulls something from his pocket, running his fingers over the gold cover before he pops it open.

He takes another breath as a small smile spreads on his lips. He turns it towards you and holds it out for you to take. You eye him suspiciously for a few seconds, but you take a step, and then another, and another until you’re within reach of the round object. You take it from his fingers and bring it to your eyes, taking a breath when you see a picture of yourself staring back at you.

“That’s my compass. I used it every day - I saw you every day. You are why I made it home.” He says softly, his watery eyes bouncing between yours, “I’m home now - for good, and that’s how I can fix it. I willingly offer you every day of my life from this minute on. Whatever you want, whatever you need, I’ll get for you. I’ll protect you, I will love you, I will honor and treasure you. I’ll give you every piece of me.”

You hold a hand over your chest, for fear that your heart will leap right out of it. You drag in deep breaths as you shake your head, “I don’t know you anymore. I don’t know you.”

“You know me,” he answers quickly as he pushes up the stairs to meet you, “I’m still me, just in a new body, that’s all.”

“I don’t want this new body. I loved you just as you were.”

He grabs your hands, bringing the backs of your fingers to his lips as you cry, “I know you did baby. Give me a chance, baby doll. Please? You’ll like this new body once you see it, I promise.” He smiles. 

You don’t. Deep in the back of your mind you want to believe him. You want to fall into his arms and have him kiss your tears away and make love to you until you can’t stand it anymore. You want to wake up in his arms tomorrow and every day after that until you take your dying breath - but it’s not that easy. You were idealistic in highschool and stayed that way right up until the day he left, but you aren’t now. You can’t afford to be. It’s still only 1945. He’s still a white man, you’re still a negro woman. You’re still not able to mix, not that boldly anyway.

“It’s not that easy.” You whisper.

He rests his forehead to yours, “It is that easy,” he whispers back, “Let me prove it to you.”

“No, it’s - they won’t leave us be. You can’t be with me - “

“Don’t you talk like that.” He says sternly, “I dare anybody to say anything to you. I’ll throw ‘em through a goddamn wall.”

“Steve - “

He cuts you off, bringing his finger to your lips. You close your eyes and take a few deep, calming breaths. God knows you want to believe him. You’ve been so angry for so long. He places his large hand to your chest, resting his palm right over your heart.

“I can make you love me again.” 

You inhale sharply as you look up at him, “I never stopped loving you, Steve. I never stopped.”

You moan when he crashes his lips to yours. He lifts you from your feet with complete ease, an ease you’ve never seen him display before, and crushes your now much smaller body to his. You wrap your arms around his shoulders as you kiss him back hard, pulling back only to tilt your head before diving back in for more of him. You press your hands to the sides of his face as you catch your breath, his lips moving down to your chin and to your neck, placing kisses on every inch of exposed skin. 

You dig into your purse, pulling out your keys. He pulls back - out of breath, his lips flushed red and swollen as he stares up at you. You push your keys into the palm of his hand and wrap your legs around his waist as you nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck. You close your eyes as he holds you tight, cradling an arm underneath your behind before he walks up to the front door of your building. He slips the key inside the lock and twists, pushing the door open, before you direct him to your humble apartment. 

You wake up in his arms the next morning, and every day after that until you take your last breath. 

[livedsomanylives]

I was tagged by @rvspberryjvm !! Thank you so much 🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟💘💘💘

1. why did you choose your URL?

it's a line from a NIN song, 'I do not want this' that got stuck in my mind long ago. It says 'I've lived so many lives. All in my head' and the moment i heard it I thought yes. Sums me up and my inability to do reality pretty well.

2. any side-blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

yep. a few. i've got @withoneheadlight, where i spend most my time here, in my beloved harringrove fandom <3, and then i have a few where i basically save things that interest me in different categories.

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

uh, technically a few years?. I've had a few different accounts that I always ended up forgetting about. But had never really used tumblr until this past last year and a half.

4. do you have a queue tag?

I use the most simplistic 'queue' ... when I remember to put it on XD (which, I should, because I'm always so worried people think I'm in here ignoring them when in reality what I usually have is the longest queue)

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

this one used to be my inspiration sterek blog for a fic I was writing at that time (4 years ago?) so there's basically all sterek at the bottom. but now I have @ivoryhead for that and this one has become my personal blog, since is my main.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

because billy hargrove in profile + light blue + a distant, cool sun? one of the most beautiful things i've ever seen. also, it has some sort of melancholy that just, gets to me.

7. why did you choose your header?

because that's Cannon Beach, where a few scenes from the goonies were filmed, and where are the rocks carved into the doubloon. I always end up mixing the goonies in everything I do because gosh, I'd live in the feeling of that movie if I could choose. 80s kids + pirate stories. doesn't get better than that for me.

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

oh, i dunno? probably is this dumb star wars/stormpilot comment xD

9. how many mutuals do you have?

I honestly don't know, but they all are amazing mutuals <3

10. how many followers do you have?

tbh i really like how tumblr doesn't show the follower count? i LOVE the ones i have (hiiiiiiiiiii!!! 😘😘😘) and it's always 🎉🎉🌟🌟🌟🎉🎉🎉 getting new followers but i still think is better that is hidden, for many different reasons.

11. how many people do you follow?

about 1000? Im just too lazy to go through my big-ass list and unfollow watever is inactive xD

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

if saying the first stupid thing that comes to my head in here is considered a shit post, then t o o m a n y.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

I love to check it bc is kinda like hanging around with all of you 🎉🎉 but I've been trying to reduce the number of times i do it bc i get eaaaaaasily distracted and also, neck pain ugh. phone bad BAD!

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

nope. never. sometimes i want to leave my opinion in some posts, but i still feel pretty insecure about the language, so i'm perpetually afraid of being misunderstood

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts

the ones with something good/bad is gonna happen if you don't reblog? i usually scream internally while i fast-scroll past them while both feeling like bwahhahaha! and scared shitless.

16. do you like tag games?

oh i LOVE tag games.

17. do you like ask games?

very very much. even if sometimes i repent bc it's hard for me to find the time to answer them xD.

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

Idk but @chichipafarolillos is my personal superstar 💞💞💞💞💞

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

No crush but I really really 💗💗💗💗 my mutuals.

20. tags?

(forgot to publish this so you'all have probably been tagged already but!)

@memes-saved-me @jimhhawkins @fuckoldmansteve @smashmouth-hargrove @mourntheantagonist @catharrington @thestreetsatnight @lovebillyhargrove @foxie-herminah @disdaidal @c0bblenygma @inthelonelycoolbeforedawn @gothyringwald @swimbirdyswim @imnotyourmarypoppins @cherrydreamer @ihni @leatherr-n-lace @allaboardtheussharringrove @silentlylovingyourwork @wint3r-b0y @honeydewmelo @aeon-of-neon @mediocre--writing

[anunvalidcritic]

The Boys: SN2.7

(DISCLAIMER: MY OPINION IS MY OWN AND CAN BE DEEMED INVALID TO THOSE WHO DON’T CARE FOR IT.) 

Sorry for the delay but I’ve been really busy with work and I haven’t gotten much sleep due to this but nonetheless I was able to finish it and upload the commentary.

               BUTCHER, BAKER, CANDLESTICK MAKER

(Photo Credit: @01091006)

Alright we’ve got ourselves a grown ass man whose clearly obsessed with STORMFRONT

Ik he’s gettin’ tired of seeing/doing the same shit over and over again

Maybe he’s one of the meme makers

Yep called that shit again

He better not become some fucking murder... smdh

“Congress?? Please what a bunch of corrupt cunts they are.” - BUTCHER

(this line hit a little too close to home iykyk)

This congresswoman looks familiar... I can’t put my finger on it though

Alright so whose that ringing BUTCHER’s line?? (That’s a long ass number too)

“Mom I don’t want a fucking unicorn frappe.” - ANNIE

Bro wtf?!!!!!

“And Serge... no abandoning your post this time.” - MALLORY

rip to BUTCHER’s father

BLACK NOIR didn’t have to go in on ANNIE like that

ICONIC DIALOGUE

LAMPLIGHTER - “Okay. Different strokes, man.”

HUGHIE - “Please don’t say that in this context.”

“You know this isn’t healthy, man. Y-You can’t watch porn while the... sun’s out.”- HUGHIE

LAMPLIGHTER = ARSONIST

I like how HUGHIE said “nevermind” just to continue with his story.

LOL THAT TRANSITION BETWEEN HOMELANDER TALKING ABOUT ANNIE AND HUGHIE LOOKING AT THE SCREEN IS PURE GOLD

“Come on do you want me to cuck? Or be the guy who fucks the wife?” - HUGHIE

“Yeah, come on. Let’s go fuck the wife. Con-sensually.” - HUGHIE

You know I never truly understood why the nickname “Billy” went with the name William.

ICONIC DIALOGUE

SAM - “What, no hug?”

BUTCHER - “You step one inch closer, and I’ll kill you quicker than that fucking arse cancer.”

SAM - “I bet you would.”

ROFL The way he slapped his finger away

Beating the shit out of your kids does not equal “tough love”

Sooo.... LENNY committed suicide...

Wow, well I’ll be damned tha nazi bitch has a heart

I haven’t seen MAEVE use her powers in a minute!! That poor table.

Wait why is DR. VOGELBAUM in a wheelchair??? Ig HOMELANDER really did fuck his ass up.

Wow I really forgot M.M’s gov name is MARVIN.

FRENCHIE reminiscin’ -- You know i still remember when FRENCHIE said his dad smothered him with a hello kitty duvet lol

Watch me fuck around and learn KIMIKO’s sign language

Fish Bowl = Fixing Grievances

Bruh this whole church is toxic

“And boom, bitchies!” - LAMPLIGHTER

“Your America’s second favorite lesbian couple, after all.” - ASHLEY

Whose the first?... Ellen and Portia??

“Ashley for once in your life be a fucking human being.” - MAEVE

Their watching a lego movie of the Blindside

... I think we all know HOMELANDER is lying to BECCA. He’s gonna snatch that little boy up in the middle of the night.

BUTCHER a whole maniac

Why do I feel like LAMPLIGHTER is gonna step HUGHIE up...

👀...

HUGHIE RUN!!!

My mouth is really ajar looking at this hand scene

She’s walking a little too slow for me... I foresaw that shit!

BLACK NOIR is strong af! Jesus he’s throwing her around like a dog that vigorously shakes its head with a toy in its mouth.

STARLIGHT bro I’m gonna need you to get the fuck up! Don’t let this dude choke you out!

... once again... fuck almond joy’s

Y’all can do this reunion shit later. GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE BUILDING!

ICONIC DIALOGUE

M. M. - “Kid, you are fucking unbelievable. All you had to do was watch porn.”

HUGHIE - “I didn’t know he was gonna set himself on fire?!?.”

I think we all knew this church for supes was all kinds of fucked up. But this whole scenario of EAGLE hunting his partner dressed up as a deer is on the stranger side to things. 

Why tf did ANNIE’s mom look at KIMIKO like that?!?!

HOMELANDER lookin’ sick af!

BRUH IS THAT FUCKING CINDY!!!!????

“Oh, shit.” - THE DEEP

_______________

episode 6 here. Once again I’m sorry for the delay in the post. I’ll have to figure out my timing better. But on a lighter note... EPISODE 8 WILL BE THE LAST FOR THE SEASON!!! We already know it got confirmed for a season 3 so this last episode better fucking bring it!

[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching SPN 15x18 “Despair”

WOW TODAY SURE IS A DAY, HUH

-

04:40pm

Y’ALL

I KNOW WHAT HAPPENS

I KNOW WHAT’S COMING

BUT AM I PREPARED?

my post leading up to this: https://almaasi.tumblr.com/post/634003656411381760/i-have-seen-the-spn-spoilers-okay-okay-okay

i found a faster torrent and there are 7 minutes until it’s done I’M GONNA GO WANDER AROUND FOR A BIT BRB

-

04:51pm

window is blacked out

i am as ready as i can be, i think

-

04:52

HERE WE GO

-

omg so much has happened irl i fully forgot what happened at the end of the last ep so THANK U RECAP

-

BILLIE JUST

BOMBED THE EMPTY

WITH JACK

:0

-

05:00

just as i was thinking “aaah billie’s probably lying, jack’s capital D Dead” THERE’S JACK

-

JACK’S BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-

05:05pm

nice shot

-

05:07

CHARLIE’S PARTNER IS GORGEOUS AND THIS IS SO HAPPY

they better both make it to the end and out the other side or istg

-

OH NO WHERE DID BABE GO

-

babe is named stevie

BRIng STEVIE BACK

-

05:09

THIS PLACE IS CALLED KIM MANOR

-

we’re like 1/3 of the way into this episode?? damn

-

cas and jack hanging out on the hood of the impala like the brothers did all those years ago

good family talk spot

-

05:13

high quality face

-

05:15

cas: WE DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU BECAUSE YOU’RE USEFUL OR--

cas baby yesssssssssssssssssssssss

these are the words cas can say because he knows them for himself

-

05:19

THE DOTS ON SAM’S PHONE CHAT WITH EILEEN

DISAPPEARING

OH...................

-

05:26

DONNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

oh i wish we’d had more donna and jody :/

-

05:29

dean’s gonna lose cas and then it’s gonna be the sam+charlie+dean “i just lost my lover” club :c

-

05:34

just thinkin about the ending of the final episode

the only two endings i really want are:

everyone we love is somehow alive and they drive into the sunset

they all die but wake up in heaven and there’ll be peace when you are done

or some combination thereof

-

05:37

billie: i didn’t hurt your friends

yeah i thought not

-

bobby vanishes and my eyes flood with tears

that last look between him and sam........

-

wait when was donna from another universe??? or did she die at some point

WOW I’VE FORGOTTEN A LOT

-

05:42

dean: “what do we do, ca--- my heart”

.......

yep

i’m not ready for whatever’s about to happen

-

I’M SO !!!!!!!!!!

BECAUSE THE FACT THEY JUST WON’T DIE

AND THEY ALWAYS COME BACK

IS THE SEMI-BOSS FIGHT

I’M LOVING THIS

EVEN THOUGH I HATE IT

-

05:46

this sure is a screenshot huh

-

05:49

/mutes discord bc this needs all of my attention

-

05:51

cas’ eyes are starting to tear up and he’s smiling as he starts to talk and ohhhhhhhhh here it comes

-

05:53

there’s.

literally.

a wall.

between them.

talk about SYMBOLISM

-

jensen’s pupils are so wide right now holy shit

-

“you are the most caring man on earth”

dean looking at these words like it’s news to him

;~;

cas

thank you for saying these things we’ve all been yelling at the screen for years

-

05:58

DEAN HAS CAS’ BLOODY HANDPRINT ON HIS JACKET

........i can’t let myself believe that was it

THERE WILL BE MORE

SURELY

like

in no conceivable world do the writers get this far, give us THAT, and have it never be mentioned again or properly resolved

hello yes i’m waiting for the magic ritual where cas’ bloody handprint plays a part

-

06:02

yeah i mean

if they saved the whole world multiple times over

everyone’s gotta go

-

oh dean................. oh no

-

GOD

THAT REALLY WAS SOMETHING HUH

i feel like my full reaction is reserved 

because this was half a story. this was one-sided and it was just cas’ monologue. dean has things to say

THIS IS OBVIOUSLY NOT OVER

i know people (misha??) has said it’s a permadeath but i do not believe that, and i don’t believe anything anyone says about what’s coming tbh

i got an anon in my inbox a few weeks ago who correctly predicted this, saying they knew someone on set, but like......... the real ending would be top secret and anything that gets out would not end up in the inbox of some fic author along with a bad vibe. (i didn’t answer it, not wanting to stir up shit.)

that anon said cas isn’t in the last two episodes. except that can’t possibly be true because we, the audience, can see people in the empty, and cas still needs to yell at the empty, and death is in there too... and the empty just wants to sleep so we need to see that too, and cas would be there.

THERE’S MORE TO COME, KIDS

two episodes left

i’m wary of the next one because it’s the deadly duo writing, but they seem to be okayish these days so maybe it’ll be fine

but the finale..... fingers crossed <3

fingers also crossed for a blue georgia, north carolina, and pennsylvania <3

/goes back to cnn livestream because I WANNA WATCH WHEN GEORGIA FLIPS

also. back to spn for a sec. i’m a leeeeeeetle bit mad that the gay black woman disappears first. like i know everyone died but. haven’t we had enough of that??

10/10 even so BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN IT COULDN’T HAVE BEEN BETTER

eh. this show is what it is, and i just gotta accept that, BUT ALSO I THINK WE’RE GENUINELY GETTING SOMEWHERE WITH DEAN AND CAS HERE

but only so long as this actually has a conclusion

which it must do

because this is very much an emotional cliffhanger. cas just emotion-dumped and then fucked off so dEAN’S GOTTA PROCESS AND THEN CHASE HIM

OBVIOUSLY

BECAUSE THAT’S HOW LOVE STORIES WORK

we didn’t watch 15 years of this thing only to be given half of what we wanted in the closing moments, and then get left left high and dry. the writers/producers are clearly willing to give us canon love confessions, and they're not gonna get as far as this, with a finale as tense and dramatic as this, and be like lol dean's straight and only likes cas as a friend........... after he’s dead and died for the joy of their love........... that's beyond madness

and dean needs to SPEAK. there are so many things he’d never said. and he needs to say them to cas. he was basically silent in this conversation and you can’t just say that’s their ending. it’s not their ending.

AND LIKE

IF THIS SHOW AND THIS FINALE AND THIS SEASON HAS PROVED ANYTHING

IT’S THAT NOBODY STAYS DEAD

AND WHATEVER THE WRITER INTENDS, THE CHARACTERS HAVE THEIR OWN DESIRES AND DRIVES

AND FOR THAT REASON, GAY LOVE WILL PIERCE THROUGH THE VEIL OF DEATH AND SAVE THE DAY

[ice-cream-nekogirl]

i needed to lose you to love me (Bakugou Katsuki X Reader)

Summary: Bakugo sucks at apologizing, but knows that he owes you one. Big Time.

WARNING: THERE IS SOME MAAAAJOR AAAAANGST AND STRANGER THINGS 3 SPOILERS IN THIS CHAPTER.  LIKE… MAJOR... I might have to actually make an alternate ending... sure I personally think this one has a happy ending too but... have ya’ll HEARD Selena Gomez’s new music video and song? It’s heartbreakingly beautiful but important about self-love so... here ya’ll go! Warning it’s also pretty lengthy... I also alluded to American Horror Story in here too.

Taglist: @i-love-bakugou​, @soseoky​, @random-username-101​

The Long Awaited Part 2 of ‘Dump His Ass’ here: https://ice-cream-kitsunegirl.tumblr.com/post/186316524474/dump-his-ass-bakugou-katsuki-x-reader

And Thank You All Might: https://ice-cream-kitsunegirl.tumblr.com/post/186833600249/thank-you-all-might

If you haven’t seen Stranger Things 3 year and don’t want any spoilers… this one has HUGE spoilers so… read at your own risk…

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zlJDTxahav0

You promised the world and I fell for it... I put you first and you adored it

It’s been at least a couple of months and yet you found yourself still upset over the newfound sadness that plagued you as you put away an empty glass of water in the sink, sniffling a little bit. Unable to help but let some tears stream down your face as you could only think about what you had lost.

Why did it have to be him?

Yes, he was a huge jerk but he had a good side after all.

It wasn’t just you, many others had to see his nastier sides and witnessed him beat up some innocent people. And many, including yourself had thought there was no way such a jerk could ever have any sort of redeeming qualities, and the only good trait about him was that he was good-looking and badass.

He acted like he was so big and tough and bullied others just to show off his power, but even he had a soft spot that he buried deep down inside.

And you lost him.            

Now all you could do was cry as you grabbed a tissue to wipe your face, not wanting to go to school upset over such a silly thing. Plus, you already embarrassed yourself in class not long ago by crying in front of everyone, so it was time to just get over it…

But you missed him…

“(Y/N)?” You nearly perked up as soon as you heard a familiar voice that belonged to the person you had been avoiding for the past months. Your ex-boyfriend…

Bakugou wasn’t a patient guy, and had been trying to bug you for the past couple of months but you stopped letting him and he had reluctantly put up with your silent treatment and cold shoulders. However, he couldn’t ignore your tears, he fucking HATED seeing you cry and he fucking HATED knowing that he was responsible for them…

Set fires to my forest And you let it burn...

He tried to get close to you, but you never let him, except this time he wasn’t going to let you just push him away. “Oy. What the fuck’s the matter…?” Despite his coarse language there was gentleness as he closed in towards you and looked you in the eyes.

“H-He’s gone…” You didn’t want to really see him, but you decided to just answer his question and his eyes slightly widened, “Who’s gone?” His concern grew when he thought that someone important to you might have died or disappeared.

“B-Billy… Billy’s gone… Hopper’s gone too… a-and so is Alexei…” You wiped your tears away with a napkin and swallowed hard to try and not get so emotional over the beloved characters you grew attached to.

But Bakugou could only blink in befuddlement, only for that to turn into pure and simmering annoyance, “Seriously?! Are you talking about the characters from that show?! I thought someone actually died!” He quickly shouted as you put your hand over your mouth to quell a snicker, as sad as you were over losing Billy, Hopper and Alexei, Bakugou’s anger was so amusing.

Yes you had been rewatching Stranger Things 3 ever since it came out because it was THAT good, you finally watched all of it with your friends and it was the BEST season thus far. Yet, it still didn’t cease to break your heart with the way it concluded this year.

“Yes… I am… oh yeah… Billy’s dead… and Alexei’s a new character that everyone fell in love with, Hopper’s also PROBABLY dead and Eleven… moved away from Hawkins can you believe it…?” With a small smirk you told him everything that you were sad about and you were actually really shocked to see his eyes go wide in the slightest bit of outrage as he yelled.

“DON’T TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED IN THE THIRD SEASON! I haven’t seen it yet!”

“Well I wouldn’t have to tell you what happened if you had just sat your ASS DOWN that night and watched it with me.” It was your turn to be harsh as you used a sharper tone that almost scared your ex as he looked at you in shock. He was not used to this side of you at all because you were usually his cheerful if weird and kooky girlfriend.

Bakugou knew you could be tough, but being on the end of it was… scary to witness.

“Now you care about the show?” You chuckled and shook your head when you recalled all of the times when he mocked your taste in shows and repeatedly said that Stranger Things was unoriginal and stupid. Well, actually at first you were okay with it because that was okay and it wasn’t anything personal, but then he started mocking other things that you liked knowing that you liked them and then mocked you for liking them. Why did you put up with all of that?

Sang off-key in my chorus 'Cause it wasn't yours...

“Because you made me watch it! You’re the idiot that got me invested in that dumb show in the first place!”

“Okay, maybe I was a LITTLE bit pushy but… did it kill you to watch something with me every now and then you jerk?” You had calmed down a little bit, and instead put your hands up just to stop this pointless argument, much to Bakugou’s slight surprise as his scowl had lessened.

“You know what? Nevermind… I’m not going to argue about a freaking show… and I’m not gonna waste yours or my time… I forgot how much you value your time.” Shaking your head, you grabbed your bags to get ready to leave soon. Maybe you were giving Bakugou the guilt trip, but in your defense he called you fat and accused you of being lazy, and you were starting to realize that he didn’t give you a whole ton of respect during your relationship as he insulted things you liked, didn’t spend a lot of time with you, brushed you off when you tried to help him, blew you off at times and again, he called you fat. Something he swore that he would NEVER call you, and he broke that swear.

He treated you like garbage so now, like Max had said, it was time to treat HIM like garbage.

And so far the guilt-trip was working and Bakugou hated that it was. Every time you reminded him of the things he said, this knot in his chest would build and it would make him SO angry and yet so fucking guilty.

“Dammit (Y/N)… will you just listen? I know I said some stupid-shit but-“

Uh-uh, you didn’t want to hear it and you quickly put your fingers in your ears and started to sing, “Lalalalala~! I can’t hear you~! I respond to nothing Katsuki~!” You sang outloud and that just made the already frustrated Bakugou even madder, “CUT THAT OUT! (Y/N) YOU MORON STOP ACTING LIKE A FUCKING KID!!”

“I’m sorry? But I can’t understand you Katsuki… cuz you’re a human… and I’m a pig, remember? Pigs can’t understand humans… there’s a language barrier. Oink, oink.” Your eyes were wide in fake surprise which REALLY shocked but also REALLY infuriated your ex.

“Do NOT call yourself that! You’re not a pig! Come on I didn’t MEAN what I said all right?!” You couldn’t be serious; you couldn’t have taken his words to heart THAT much could you? He really hoped not, because it just made him regret what he said even more.

However, you weren’t listening to him and just continued to ignore him as you tried to walk away, but Bakugou wasn’t going to let you. He didn’t like this feeling, he didn’t like it at all…

I saw the signs and I ignored it Rose-colored glasses all distorted 

“Hey! Goddamn it (Y/N) stop ignoring me!” Bakugou wasn’t used to you ignoring him at all, because you always, always gave him your attention, sometimes a little too much but he got used to it. And he liked that...

“Katsuki, you SERIOUSLY hurt me… I’ve told you this… the damage is done… you know I had a hard time growing up because of that… and you and Izuku were the only ones who never called me things like that when everyone else did…” Your voice cracked yet again as you quickly turned away and walked away as fast as you could, not giving Bakugou the chance to try and reach out for you the second he thought you were going to cry again.

Set fire to my purpose And I let it burn

“Argh! (Y/N)!” Bakugou called your name, but his guilt kept him rooted to where he stood as he let you walk off. But his eyes slightly widened when Mina and Yaoyorozu had been around and came just in time to walk with you and give warning glances to Bakugou so he didn’t try to come over to you. Mina even made sure to glare at him as the girls put their hands on your shoulders as the three of you walked away and left your ex alone.

Again…

“Dammit…!” He exclaimed to himself with his fists clenched. God he really fucked up; his classmates were giving him the stink-eye and you probably hated him. He couldn’t have that.

Well, Bakugou still really didn’t give a shit about what the others thought about him, but maybe, just maybe he didn’t want you to hate him. Even if it was his own fault. The more he reflected on what he said to you, the worse he felt…

You got off on the hurtin' When it wasn't yours, yeah...

8 HOURS LATER

You held back a yawn at the last class of the day, resisting the urge to go to sleep when Aizawa droned on and on about something you didn’t really care about. Well, it wasn’t that you were sad or anything, you were totally over everything that went down the last couple of days. Frankly, you had better things to think about and deal with than your dumb ex-boyfriend.

Like the new Zombieland! Now that you watched Stranger Things 3, it was time to get into something new. And you finished Big Mouth season 3 too so… you needed something else to focus on that wasn’t related to your ex or school. You giggled a little bit at the thought, maybe you should have been focused on studying for upcoming tests but at the same time it felt like everyone had been working too hard.

So the minute it was time to go you quickly went over to Izuku to see if you could drag him to the next showing.

“Hey ‘Zuku c’mere I got a plan…” You kinda grabbed his arm, making him jump a bit in surprise as he yelped a little bit. “A-Ah! Oh! H-Hey (Y/N)-chan… s-sure…” You thought he was so cute even though you two had been friends forever and he STILL got nervous whenever you touched him.

However, Bakugo didn’t find it cute AT ALL. Why the hell were you touching Deku?! What the hell were you doing with Deku?!

You didn’t notice this though as you just lulled him away to whisper, “Hey I’m like super hyped for the new Zombieland cuz it’s been getting some pretty good reviews despite the fact that it’s been like 10 years since the last one so… wanna go see it with me? I’m gonna invite some other fun people with me~.” It was a bit of a sudden, spontaneous idea but you thought ‘fuck it’ you wanted to go watch an awesome zombie movie with your friends and get school off your mind for a little bit.

Wasn’t that one of Columbus’s rules after all? Rule 32: Enjoy the little things. Yes you memorized some of the rules, some of them were good rules!

“Zombieland? Oh, that’s right! They made a sequel… sure…! I think that would be kind of nice…” Izuku wasn’t exactly a movie buff like you were but he liked spending time with you and watching movies or TV with you, and he liked the first Zombieland too.

“Great! Give ourselves a goddamn break ya know? I think we’re all kinda stressing out so yeah! Let’s go for it dude!” You gave him a big grin as he couldn’t help but blush quite madly, but he was happy that you seemed a bit happier as of late. Given the drama that occurred after you and Bakugou broke up and the mini depression you went through afterwards that lessened somewhat with the help of him, Shinsou and All-Might.

Did you still get sad? Of course. Depression and a low self-esteem don’t just go away, but your friends had been helping you through that, and you even still talked to All-Might whenever he and Izuku were training together or discussing something together.

“Actually that’s… not a bad idea at all. I suppose we have been a little busy lately...” He took note of what you were planning, and thought that a break could be good for him and his friends. “YEAH! Totally! I’m gonna invite Hitoshi! And Mina, and Tooru, and Denki, Fumikage, Yuga, Tsu, Momo, Eijirou, Hanta…” You listed off a few people you planned to invite since those were the ones you felt oddly closest to. It was a pretty big group but hey they could pay for their own tickets right? Besides the more the merrier!

“I think they’ll really like that (Y/N)-chan.” He thought outloud as the two of you walked out of the place together and headed towards the dorms, unaware that a furious Bakugou overheard EVERYTHING.

You were inviting THOSE losers to see a fucking movie but not him?! What the hell?! Now you were full-on ghosting him?!

That’s what it certainly felt like as he discreetly followed you and the damn nerd back to the dorms and you cheerfully skipped over to your room to get some good clothes on and get your things altogether so you could prepare for the upcoming time-slot at 6. You still had 2 hours but you liked to be ready before then.

And you quickly started to text to your friends. 

‘Hey Toshi, let’s go see Zombieland 2! I hear it’s really good so lets go C it bro!’ 

You texted Shinsou first though since he was the other friend you considered your closest.

‘Sure. Liked the first one, looking forward to this one.’ 

He quickly texted you back and was certainly up for it as you grinned and decided to tease him just a little bit. ‘HOORAY! And it’s a movie made just for you!’

‘HAHAHA YOU’RE SO FUNNY’ 

His text was very sarcastic but just as playful as yours as you snickered a little bit before you started sending the other texts to your friends.

‘LET’S GO SEE ZOMBIELAND 2 YA’LL. We need break, let’s go laugh it up at the movies!’

Was the text you sent via group messaging to Mina, Hagakure, Kaminari, Tokoyami, Aoyama, Tsuyu, Yaoyorozu, Kirishima and Sero. And you were met with numerous replies.

‘YEAH! I LOVED THE FIRST ONE!!’

‘Oooh I’m so excited for the sequel!’

‘Oh yeah! Now that’s an idea (Y/N)! Let’s nut up or shut up!’

‘I will never turn down an offer to see a zombie movie.’

‘Yes~. The first one was amazing, the second will be just as good~.’

‘I did like the first one, I’d like to see the second one too so that sounds like it would be fun (Y/N)-chan.’

‘Oh that comedy horror movie? Sure! The first one you showed me was good!’

‘OH HELL YES! I love that movie! It’s a yes (Y/N)! Thank you! I’m so up for that!’

‘Sure! I freaking loved the first one, dunno how this one’ll do without Bill Murray tho.’

You snickered at someone of their replies, finding many of them cute and funny at the same time. Looks like you had a party to go see this movie with, and you couldn’t be happier. You really needed this, since the past months hadn’t been easy since you were admittedly still getting over Bakugou. And you thought about what All-Might said, how you had to believe that you were beautiful and that you deserved love.

Of course, you still had a hard time believing that because it wasn’t just something you could drill into yourself and expect it to stay there, but at the same time you made sure to keep reminding yourself that and set your inner saboteur at bay. While at the same time, trying to not let what Bakugou told you dictate how you saw yourself.

You loved Bakugou, you really did, but he was mean to you, even though you knew what you were getting into, it ended up hurting you more than you ever thought it would when he just kept saying things that hurt and got into arguments with you whenever you wanted him to just spend a little time with him. He hurt you, and it was something you couldn’t quite just let go of, even though you weren’t exactly upset at him anymore, part of you still was.

And the love you still had for him didn’t leave you, but you kind of hated him too for being such a jerk to you, to Izuku and to Shinsou too for that matter. You hated him and you hated all the terrible things he said to you, because his remarks made you realize that no, you didn’t deserve any of that. Sure, you knew that maybe he really did love you at one point, because he kept trying to apologize so that meant he had to have still loved you right?

Or was it just his pride trying to win you back so he didn’t feel like a loser? You weren’t so sure, but deep down you knew that he did love you and did it because maybe he did feel really bad for what he said.

Dammit you wanted to hate him, but dammit you fucking loved him too. And damn, dammit it wasn’t good for you. You couldn’t just take him back after all of that, but you would at least know that he wasn’t a bad guy, he did have a heart, and that he did love you, and you loved him too…

But you didn’t deserve to have him treat you the way you did either. You loved him, but you were learning how to love yourself too.

You sighed as you got in your clothes and got everything you’d need from your wallet to your purse as you left your room. Making your way to the common room to hang about until it was a good time to leave.

“So Zombieland 2 huh?” Shinsou surprised you by suddenly speaking and popping up right behind you as you let out a shriek and jumped. Dammit he really was like a cat after he started training more. Hell he was so good you didn’t even detect that he was there since he was like a ninja learning how to subdue any obvious aura that you could sense.

“Good God man you’re going to need to start wearing a bell or something!” You whined a little bit as he couldn’t help but chuckle a bit at your expense and the light flush on your cheeks.

“But yes… Zombieland 2… Double Tap. What the fuck am I right? I looooves me some zombie movies! Add a little comedy to it and you get one hell of a flick!” However, you went from surprised to cheerful as you happily shook your firsts in giddy anticipation.

“Heh… yeah you got a point. The first one set the bar… might as well see if these guys still got it after 10 years…” He thought outloud as you gave him a nod and a thumbs up. “It was actually my first rated R movie.” Shinsou then decided to share as you perked up a bit with a gasp. “For reals?”

He smiled and nodded as a grin came to your lips, “Nice… that’s a good start to the world of R rated movies. I’ve been watching so many R rated movies at a young age I forgot my first one…” You KINDA bragged but you weren’t lying, you’d gotten into R rated movies at a pretty early age, but Shinsou was actually somewhat impressed as he gave you a smirk.

“Oh yeah? You’re not the only one… I just have a better memory.” And he kinda poked fun at you as you laughed and playfully smacked his shoulder. “I’ll give you that…” Still you decided to own up to that because yes, you didn’t have the best memory unless it came to movie lines, character quirks or memes.

“Well… it’s a good idea, and I’m into it so… I’ll just go put on something that’s… not my uniform.” Shinsou’s smile looked almost coy as he scratched the back of his neck as you smiled back at him, “Take your time, movie don’t start for another hour and a half.” You said as he gave you a polite wave that you happily returned.

Yeah, you couldn’t wait to see the movie now. Especially with Shinsou, Izuku and all the others, they were so great. Shinsou and Izuku were so great… Shinsou was great…

You couldn’t help but think as you made sure you had everything, and some candy you stored away and would sneak into the theaters as you put the treats into the secret pockets of your purse. However, you paused momentarily when you definitely felt someone else’s aura in the room, no one other than Bakugou’s. You knew what his aura felt like, it was always so vibrant, bright and almost hot whenever you came so close as you could always see it flickering and blazing. Only this time, it was subdued, akin to a small candle.

“So you’re going to see that movie huh?” There it was, his low, raspy voice that you had fallen in love as you turned to see him looking so oddly calm. Bakugou wasn’t known for being calm at all, and yet he was here looking strangely cool.

You had to admit, although you kinda wanted to still treat him like garbage you were starting to feel kind of guilty about it too. So you decided to be more civil this time as you smiled, “Let me guess… Denki and Eijirou told you?” You asked politely as he scoffed and rolled his eyes, “Duh. Those two don’t know how to keep their traps shut when they’re excited…”

Maybe you could invite him? You thought, sure he was probably going to turn it down but… no, it probably wasn’t a good idea.

“In their defense, it’s been 10 years since the last one showed. The actors are all kinda old now, and we’re interested to see if they still got that thing ya know? If they can hold a candle to the first one, not sure you remember it but it was hella funny.” You said with a smile, and Bakugou couldn’t help but feel somewhat at ease.

The smile was real and it’s been a LONG time since he’s gotten a smile from you, it almost hurt seeing you smile because he remembered the times when you and him were together, you were always smiling. But this time, you and him weren’t together, and yet you were smiling now. Of course, Bakugou wanted you to be happy, but were you happy without him…? He almost didn’t want that… he wanted to be the one to make you smile because he was never, EVER going to say the stupid shit he said ever again.

“I remember.” He said gently and you were KINDA freaking out, was this even the real Bakugou? You were a little concerned, but you knew you shouldn’t have been since the calm aura was still as orange and red as ever, the red drowning away the orange as you saw a flicker of pink in there. Was that love? Or was that guilt? It had to be guilt. You knew Bakugou at his most vulnerable, and you adored that side of him too, but things have been so awkward between you and him that you didn’t know what to do…

You sighed a little bit and nodded as you moved from the refrigerator to go and sit at the couch, “I always thought you were prettiest like this.” But you stopped before you could sit as you perked up at his sudden comment though, and you looked over at him in shock. Did he just say you were pretty?

We'd always go into it blindly I needed to lose you to find me

A chuckle left you, turning into a snicker as you shook your head and you saw more of your Bakugou when he narrowed his eyes at you in annoyance, “How so…? I’m… not really dressed up.”

“Well that’s why!” He raised his voice a bit, and you honestly smiled because now he was kinda back to being himself and being honest. However, he didn’t want to yell at you anymore or make you feel worse so he calmed himself down, “Just regular clothes, no make-up, messy hair… no fake, colorful shit, just your style.” Okay, now you couldn’t be so sure, but dammit he wasn’t lying, it was all in his aura, his tone, and the way he was moving closer to you.

He really was trying, wasn’t he? You wanted to forgive him, you really did, and you were still trying to but… you weren’t ready for that.

“Heh… you’ve got weird taste in girls Katsuki.” You were still self-deprecating, just like you had been in your relationship, but Bakugou always made you feel better about it, and told you that you WERE beautiful and how you never ceased to turn him on.

Only this time, the words he said to you came back, and the things you told yourself came back and reminded you that no, you couldn’t fall back into his arms. No matter how close he got as he slowly came behind you. “Stop saying shit about yourself like that… you’re beautiful…”

God you loved the warmth that radiated from his powerful physique as his arms came around you, a shudder going down your spine at the familiar feeling. No, no, no you weren’t going to fall back into his arms, dammit… you couldn’t…

It was a pleasurable torture when he put his arms around your plump waist as he caressed your sides, and gave you a gentle kiss to the side of your head. Hoping that you could forgive him as you didn’t resist his advances until you decided…

“No.” 

You wanted to, but knew that you couldn’t right now as you grabbed his hands to pry them off of you, “No Katsuki, no, no…” Shaking your head, you were surprised that you managed to get his hands off you as you heard a low growl resonate in his throat as he gave you a soft glare, but he knew that… he couldn’t do anything because you said ‘no’. And Bakugou was taught very early on by his bitch mom that no meant no…

“Sorry I just… I don’t… I’m not... I can’t do that…” You shook your hand and raised a hand as you averted his gaze and instead you went back to go and maybe get other things from your room, but the truth was you just wanted to escape this awkwardness, it was too much for you. And frankly you were terrified of falling back into his arms again…

This dancing was killing me softly I needed to hate you to love me, yeah...

Bakugou accepted that you said no but he was pissed off as he clenched his fists and trembled with hurt and rage. For a moment he almost thought you were doing this on purpose, and pushing him away for good. Why didn’t you forgive him? He apologized (a lot), he’d been trying so hard to apologize and take back everything he said to you.

Grinding his teeth, and barely holding it in, he angrily marched over to take out a minuscule of this fury on the nearby dishes on the table and shoved them off as they loudly shattered and cracked upon making impact with the floor.

“DAMMIT!!” 

He finally shouted with all the pent-up frustration, his booming voice drowning out the shattering glass as you gasped and backed away in slight shock and fear at his sudden outburst.

"How fucking long are you going to punish me (Y/N)?! HOW FUCKING LONG?! ARE YOU REALLY STILL PISSED OFF OVER SOMETHING THAT HAPPENED MONTHS AGO?!”

This reminded you of something you saw in a movie, he was so pissed and even yelling at you and honestly it did scare you, but Bakugou wouldn’t hurt you. Physically at least, you knew that much, but you weren’t going to back down

“Of COURSE, I’m still kind of pissed off! And for the record I am NOT punishing you, you narcissistic asshole, I’m TRYING to think about how I should forgive you for the things you swore to NEVER call me! Or if I even should forgive you! W-What? You want me to j-ju-ju-just… make out with you like its old times?!” You exclaimed with the same vexation that you had been keeping at bay ever since the two of you broke up, not seeing Bakugou’s narrowing eyes and shaking figure as he seethed when you once again, reminded him of the big mistake he made with you.

“I... I mean I... I can’t even look at your face Katsuki! Without… thinking about and hearing the words you said to me and the expression of anger and disgust on your face when you said that I was just some fat pig who was wasting your time!” Emotion nearly choked you up as you wiped your eyes when tears started to cloud them and you couldn’t see just how aggravated and distressed Bakugo was as he clutched his hair out of frustration.

“I FUCKED UP!! How many times do I have to say that I fucked up?! How many times do I have to say I’m sorry?!” 

Throwing his hands up, he shouted that he had indeed screwed up, louder than before, frustrated with everything, with you, with himself, with the fucking guilt that just started eating away at him again.

To love, love, yeah To love, love, yeah To love, yeah I needed to lose you to love me, yeah...

“You can say you’re sorry all you want! I just… I can’t ignore the fact that you would stoop so low to say the same things the people YOU protected me from would say to me. Why did you do that?” You had to ask, even though you were still mad as hell.

“ARGH! Dammit! I don’t fucking know! I was pissed off! I had shit I was dealing with and I took it out on you but I shouldn’t have! I admit it!” Bakugou wasn’t denying it anymore, he knew he royally screwed up and that he couldn’t use his anger as an excuse for it, but you still weren’t having it.

“Oh. Oh so that’s what I am huh? Something for you take it all out on? Well your bad temper is not an excuse Katsuki and I’m done listening to you use that as your excuse for almost everything… you can’t even put it aside to think about me or how that must have seriously hurt me. Did you ever even think about how I felt during those times? Did you ever stop to put yourself in my shoes? Did you ever feel awful and useless when you couldn’t make your partner happy? Or... d-did, did you ever dread going to school because people were going to comment about the way you look? Did you go home feeling horrible about yourself because people called you ugly and fat? Did you spend nights crying all by yourself, bored and alone and feeling like you were going to be alone for the rest of your life because everyone else made you feel so worthless? Did you ever feel like maybe it was your own fault? Did you ever think that you had to have been the worst partner ever because it seemed that no matter what you did, you couldn’t get your partner to spend time with you? Did you ever feel like maybe you really were worthless because you felt like you just couldn’t do anything right and then spend every day hating yourself?!” 

You barraged him with all of these questions that broke his heart as he hated the emotions swimming in his furious crimson eyes but that’s not what you were talking about as you glared at him with hurt, darkening red aura barely visibly radiating from you. He couldn’t even say anything because deep down, he knew that he was probably one of those people now after you broke up with him because of what he said…

“I just… god… here’s my real question… why are you such a fucking asshole to me?” That’s the real question you wanted to ask him, and Bakugou couldn’t help but look shocked, confused but even more pissed off than before. He was an asshole to everyone, but you were hellbent on this little spat because of what he said, that was it wasn’t it? You were still mad because of something he said…

“For God’s sake I said I was sorry for what I said all right?! I’ve said it a million goddamn times! I’m SORRY (Y/N)! I didn’t mean what I said to you! I want to take it all back because it was the worst fucking thing I could have ever said to anyone! Especially you!” He shouted his apology, the angry tears threatening to spill but you shook your head at this.

“I’m not talking about what you said, I’m talking about everything! Ever since we got together you’ve still managed to treat me like shit! Even before we got together you still treated me like shit, and yet it got worse when we became a thing! You hardly spent anytime with me, pushed me away when I tried to help you, made fun of what I liked, insulted me and called me other names for what? Cuz I’m a geek like Izuku, cuz I like geeky things and like to watch TV and eat sweets and say dumb puns and hang out with Izuku and Hitoshi, well I’m sick of it Katsuki! I’m fucking sick of it!” 

To love, love, yeah To love, love, yeah To love, yeah I needed to lose you to love me…

You didn’t realize the tears dripping down your chin, or the sudden wave of blue aura that your sadness triggered and emitted from your form and rushed towards anyone in the vicinity as Bakugou cringed as the tears automatically streamed down his face in response to your quirk. Damn your quirk… but he’d be lying if he said that it wasn’t just your quirk making him cry…

Neither of you noticed that some of your classmates Izuku, Shinsou, Kirishima and Hagakure instantly backed away from being seen by you or Bakugou. They heard the screaming, and they were hella uncomfortable as they gasped quietly when your quirk hit them and immediately brought tears to their eyes as Izuku and Kirishima covered their mouths as huge tears well and dripped down their faces and made them quietly cry. Shinsou shut his eyes tightly when he felt your quirk make unwanted tears pool in his eyes as he tried so hard to blink them away but couldn’t stop some from falling. Hagakure on the other hand whimpered and had to keep her mouth shut though the boys couldn’t see anything other than moisture streaming down her invisible face.

She didn’t focus on them though, instead she was just thanking the gods for making her invisible because hearing two people scream at each other was scary…

However, the screaming died down once Bakugou heard you out, and apparently everything else that became clearer to him the more you said it. He knew he wasn’t hardly a good boyfriend, aside from the more intimate times you and he shared but it couldn’t make up the bad times either. Hell, even he knew he was a pretty shitty boyfriend, but now he felt like he’d been a really shitty boyfriend after you finally said all of it. All the shitty things he’d done before and after your relationship…

You sighed, closing your eyes as you looked away from him and didn’t see the look on his face. Remorse, shame and subdued fury all etched throughout his features as he furiously wiped his face to get rid of the tears he couldn’t stop. He wanted to comfort you, but he was the one who hurt you, and now he was hurting too, all of the hurt that he caused you to feel.

You promised the world and I fell for it I put you first and you adored it...

“I’m just… I’m going to go now… sorry I just… I have to go…” But you didn’t want to be around him right now, you had a movie to go see with your friends. And the worst part is he was letting you, he wanted to follow you and just keep saying that yes, he was an asshole to you and that he just wants to take it all back so you could forgive him.

Dammit why the fuck wasn’t he moving?! Why the fuck wasn’t he saying anything?! 

All Bakugou could do was stand there, stunned in silence and growling quietly, rubbing at his tearful eyes more harshly as he watched you go. No, he couldn’t just leave it like this, it couldn’t end like this right?

No it wasn’t, he couldn’t just let it end like this, but he couldn’t bother you right now, he knew that much at least no matter how much he just wanted to go with you so he could at least be close to you after spending these past few months alone.

Yet he’d be kind enough to let you go with your friends as you spent the next hour just preparing yourself and drying your tears so you could go to everyone and say that you were okay. But of course, you weren’t okay, they knew that all too well.

Even Shinsou and Izuku held their tongues when they were all leaving with the motley crew of classmates that often didn’t hang together but were nonetheless friendly with each other.

“Ya all right there girl?”

“Is there anything you need (Y/N)?”

“I’m okay… honestly guys.” Kaminari and Kirishima were the first to ask if you were okay. “He didn’t say anything mean again did he?” Kirishima made sure to ask about Bakugou though, sure he was practically his best friend but even he wasn’t standing by him after the things he said to you. What he said was NOT cool, did he give him emotional support? Definitely, he’s the one who even told him that he should apologize to you, but he was sad that it didn’t seem to work.

However, he knew you weren’t obligated to forgive Bakugou, no matter how much everyone wanted to see a happy ending for you both.

“No one would blame you if you didn’t forgive him (Y/N). What he said was pretty cruel given you guys’ history together.” Tsuyu spoke what she thought, but she at least hoped nobody would. Some might have thought you were being unreasonable and unforgiving but Tsuyu wasn’t going to blame you if you didn’t take him back.

“She’s right. Or at least… they shouldn’t blame you. Although… I at least hope the two of you can reach better terms…” Yaoyorozu had a BIT more compassion though and sincerely hoped the best for you both and you couldn’t help but smile because that’s exactly what you wanted to.

While you and Bakugou didn’t have a pleasant conversation, you did want to at least go back to him later and say that it’d be great if you and he could at least be friends.

“I do too Momo… thanks Tsu. Thanks you guys… I’m still working on the forgiveness part but for now… I do want to get on better terms with him at least.” You smiled sadly at your sympathetic friends who all gave their nods and smiles of agreement as they seemed to approve.

“The decision is yours (L/N). There’s no obligation for you to return.”

“Yeah like, if it wasn’t healthy then you shouldn’t go back to it… sure sometimes toxic relationships can be cleansed but… Bakugou’s got his own stuff to work on too.”

Despite their less than stellar grades in school, Tokoyami and Sero were wise in their own ways, as what they said made you feel better and it made a lot of sense. And you appreciated the hell out of them for that.

“That’s right!”

“Uh huh! We’re with you with whatever choice you make too!”

“Of course my friend~.”

And it helped when Mina, Hagakure and Aoyama backed you up by giving the same endless support they had been giving you for months as you couldn’t help but tear up and laugh. “Dammit you guys… thanks… but please… enough with the mushy stuff I don’t wanna get all emotional again…” Your amused tone earned smiles and small laughs from your dear friends as Shinsou and Izuku stood by you.

“Sure… you’ve probably had enough of that huh?” Shinsou knew it’s been an emotional roller coaster for you, and he was certain that you could only handle so much mushy gushiness. “Y-Yeah… but I appreciate it… shows how much ya’ll care about me.” You had to admit that though, you loved how much all of your friends had done so much to help you.

“Anything for you (Y/N)-chan.” Izuku gave you one of his sweet smiles that you found irresistible as you smiled back at him. Something about him always made you feel so cared for; he was a good guy. He and Shinsou were such good guys.

They made you remember to actually love yourself too. They certainly loved you, and the rest of your friends loved you too. And you were starting to love yourself a little bit more too.

“Wait! There’s like 10 of us! How are… are you paying for all of us…?”

You snickered and couldn’t be happier to hear Kaminari’s comical but logical question as it broke the ice and lightened the mood. “Oh actually I also invited Shouto!” And you suddenly announced that, grinning as soon as you saw the dual-haired boy coming your way with a small smile as he watched you wave.

“Hey Shouto~!” You greeted him cheerfully as he joined in with your group.

“Hello (L/N). Hello Midoriya.” He returned the greeting politely, still giving you one of those rare little smiles that you were happy to see.

“Todoroki! (Y/N)-chan invited you too?” Izuku was especially elated to see his friend there, albeit he was surprised since you waited til the last minute to invite the fire and ice user. “Yes. She showed me the first one last week, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Now I’m interested to see how this second one will go.” Todoroki’s been slowly converted to your way of pop culture as you introduced him to several films like Disney and Marvel, but especially classic old movies like The Breakfast Club, Jennifer’s Body and Zombieland of course.

“Yeah you go bro! That’s my dude!” You were ecstatic that he was willing to come along though, and it showed. “Besides… I was able to take 10000 yen from my old man’s wallet so everything is on me.” His smile turned into a small smirk as you gasped and laughed, clapping your hands happily.

“YES! That’s my Shouto! Rebelling against daddy~!!”

Okay, maybe you kinda gave him that idea since you didn’t have a lot of money yourself, but Todoroki did, and he was more than happy to pay for you and his friends especially since it was so accessible thanks to his bitch father.

“All right~! Let’s go~!!” You exclaimed cheerfully, throwing a fist in the air as you lit up a bright, cheerful pink aura that radiated throughout your friends which made them all perk up a bit as they felt your happiness and were just as excited as you were now.

“YEAH!”

“ZOMBIELAND~!!”

“WHOO-HOO! DOUBLE TAP!!”

“CARDIO~!”

Kirishima, Mina, Sero and Kaminari were especially excited as they were your more extroverted friends, but everyone was smiling along with you as they gladly followed you to the movie theater to see this long-awaited sequel of the first beloved movie.

Everyone was happy. You were happy too, you were especially happy now despite what happened with you and Bakugou.

The same unfortunately could not be said for Bakugou, who was far from happy, but he was glad that you were at least happy. He just wishes that he could have been happy with you, and that he could make you happy.

But he didn’t make you happy anymore.

2 HOURS LATER

“That was fucking INCREDIBLE!!” You exited the theater EXTREMELY happy and almost wishing the movie didn’t end because Zombieland 2 was THAT good a movie and you were SO happy that you got to see it with all your friends. You SWORE you heard Todoroki laugh too, so that was something you were never forgetting.

“I KNOW! HA! Not bad for 10 years later!”

“I freaking loved Madison!”

“I did too! She was the funniest one!”

“Oh yeah, she was pretty much the best part of the movie.”

“Hell yeah! She was really sweet too, I liked her! She was tons of fun!”

Naturally, the Bakusquad (plus Hagakure) was as cheerful as ever as they all loved the movie they just saw, and were extremely happy that they took up your offer today, because it was money well spent. Well, Todoroki’s money but still!

He thought so too, he rather liked the sequel and found it amusing, he actually smiled and tried to not laugh at some of the dumber things that Madison girl said during the movie. “I agree, it was… amusing. I see why you go here often (Y/N).” Todoroki made sure to compliment you though, he wasn’t the best with emotions but he knew you had been kinda unhappy lately so he tried to be kinder to you.

“Thanks Shouto! I know right?! It was AWESOME! I’m SO glad I decided to just come over here~. It gets an A+ from me~.”

“One of the rare moments where the sequel is just as good as the first movie, if not better.” Tokoyami even pointed out something you highly agreed with because it was THAT good. “Exactly! You don’t get that with every movie… sequels tend to suck…”

“The new additions were good ones too, sometimes adding new characters is actually what kills the movie. Not for this one.” And Tsuyu gave her input that almost everyone here agreed with, but couldn’t choose a new favorite.

“My favorite is that Madison girl~. She knew how to dress and be the cute one~.” Aoyama had his favorite, but everyone near unanimously agreed that she was the funniest one. “But she knew how to survive too for all those years.” But Yaoyorozu pointed out that despite Madison being a cliché dumb blonde character that she STILL survived the zombie apocalypse by herself.

“An excellent point Momo! She ain’t that stupid…” You giggled a little bit alongside your best guyfriends Shinsou and Izuku. “No she was actually… oddly smart… kinda like you.” But Shinsou poked a bit of fun at you as you laughed and slapped him on his shoulder playfully. “SHUT UP TOSHI! NO… I’m not that thick I’m smart too!” You exclaimed but cheerfully as he tried his hardest to not snicker or grin at you.

“You are smart (Y/N)-chan… coming here to see this movie was smart, I liked it, I liked it a lot! It was actually better than the first one.” Izuku was the sweetheart though as he gave you a bit of a sweeter compliment, much to Shinsou’s slight annoyance.

“Thank you Izuku~.” You sang-songed cheerfully as you beamed at the blushing boy who instantly turned bashful at your smile, much to MORE of Shinsou’s annoyance. Always trying to be the ball of sunshine that guy…

However, all that mattered is that you were ecstatic and everyone else clearly had a good time and loved the hell out of the movie. And you were smiling again, Shinsou hadn’t seen you smile as much as normal so seeing you smile the way you were was very nice.

You were smiling the entire time you went back to the dorms, just laughing with your friends and re-quoting the funnier lines from the movie and discussing some of the funniest parts until all of you had to go your separate ways and return to your rooms. Especially when other classmates came into view, you didn’t wanna spoil it for anyone after all.

“Hehe… well guys I think I’m just gonna stay up a couple of more hours and go to sleep or at least try to.” You said to your friends as they each smiled and nodded before they all said ‘okay!’ ‘sure’ and ‘that’s a good idea, good night to you (Y/N)’ and you made sure to happily return the polite ‘good night’ back to them.

Now it was just you and Izuku and Shinsou, you were still just happily chatting to them, but that’s when Bakugou decided enough was enough. He heard all of the other idiots just laughing and talking about a movie he hadn’t seen it yet and now some of it was fucking spoiled for him but that’s not what mattered right now. What mattered is that he didn’t like the way he left things with you a couple of hours ago, and now he had to talk to you again.

“I’m telling you, I could totally make Zombie kill of the week if we were in the Zombie apocalypse.” You were trying to brag to Izuku and Shinsou who were just chuckling at your enthusiasm.

“That would require some elaborate way of killing them, some people get really creative with that…”

“Oh yeah? You don’t even know how to use some weapons (Y/N)…”

Izuku had more hope in you, Shinsou was just playing with you though and God Bakugou fucking hated it, especially when you laughed with them.

“Oi. Deku, Eyebags, get the fuck out of here.” Before you could reply Bakugou suddenly made his appearance and immediately told the two guys to get out, “Ah! K-Kacchan I uh…” Izuku knew how jealous Bakugou could get though and his first instinct was to try and reassure him that he wasn’t trying anything with you or anything.

“Beat it you damn nerd!” But Bakugou didn’t wanna hear him and a very scared Izuku quickly rushed out with a very frightened ‘Okay!’ as your smile instantly turned into a frown as he forced your friend out, but Shinsou wasn’t budging at least.

“Get lost Eye-bags, I need to talk to (Y/N). ALONE.” He roughly demanded the brainwasher to leave, but Shinsou had his arms crossed and stood where he was.

“I’ll go when I want to.” He shook his head and refused to leave even though Bakugou was only getting madder when Shinsou dared to tell him ‘no’, but you didn’t want there to be a fight so you raised your hand.

Set fires to my forest And you let it burn Sang off-key in my chorus...

“It’s okay Hitoshi… you don’t wanna be here… me and Katsuki DO have to talk and I’d rather you not be around to see it so… it’s okay…” You gently convinced him to leave you and your ex be for the time being and although reluctant, Shinsou sighed and complied. He knew you knew what you were doing so he got up to go, not before whispering a ‘see ya later’ as he left and he and Bakugou exchanged glares as he walked away.

You didn’t approve of how he just broke you and your friends up from a fun conversation, but you supposed that this had to be done since you and he didn’t really leave on a good note earlier today, or this morning.

No more fighting. You were done with it, you just wanted to stop fighting with him.

Except… it was easier said than done. The two of you stood in the living room for what felt like forever because none of you could find the words to say and it was beyond uncomfortable. “So… did… Kirishima and Kaminari already spoil the movie for you?” You decided to ask a lighthearted question and Bakugou ALMOST snickered.

“Yes… I’m going to kill those morons…” He didn’t really mean it but he knew how much you enjoyed those two movies and he really, just really wanted to see it with you since he loved seeing the first one with you even though back then he pretended like he thought it was stupid. But no, he liked it, and now some of it was spoiled for him. Maybe he’d go see it with you again since he knew you never minded seeing another movie twice.

“Hehe… well… it was good so… if you ever feel like seeing it, I recommend it.” You said gently with a little smile as Bakugou leered at you.

“What I want… is to just say I’m sorry for… being such a fucking asshole to you, for being the worst fucking boyfriend and… everything… I’m... I’m sorry (Y/N)... I’m so fucking sorry everything, I can’t say how sorry I am...” Bakugou shamefully blushed as he apologized to you because he was never good at doing that. Hell, he very rarely said the word ‘sorry’ at all, but lately he’d been using that more and more when it came to you after he realized just how terrible a boyfriend and friend he had been to you.

To love, love, yeah To love, love, yeah To love, yeah I needed to hate you to love me, yeah 

You were shocked but also touched that he was doing this for you, you knew how hard it was for him to apologize so you were touched and kind of happy. “Thanks Katsuki… it’s… okay… I think I’ve been mad at you long enough so… it’s okay… we’re okay.” You gave him a smile that actually gave him hope as his eyes slowly widened.

“We are…?” Bakugou asked you somewhat nervously, because he started to see some doubt in your eyes as you sighed, “Yes… we are okay but… not… in the way you think…” His heart was racing, but it wasn’t from excitement because you didn’t look like you were happy.

“Look… Katsuki… I mean you no ill will. I still care about you, and I still love you but… I really, really don’t think you’re a good boyfriend…” You said a little bluntly but made your voice soften as he gasped quietly.

“You’re not a bad person… but you’re not a good boyfriend either… and I don’t really think that I can really return to a relationship like that… sorry…” Sighing heavily you finally did it, you told him that you didn’t want to go back to the relationship but seeing his expression broke your heart.

“I know I wasn’t! But… look just… dammit (Y/N) I’m not going to say any of that shit to you ever again! I won’t fuck up like I did last time I swear!” He sounded desperate, as if he was pleading to you as he moved closer and you fought the tears starting to build in your eyes when he grabbed your hands. He would beg if he had to, he just couldn’t lose you.

“I love you.” 

He said calmly and yet sincerely, out of pure impulse but that’s what he truly meant. He loved you and he just wanted to hear you say the words back to him. He knew you did…

To love, love, yeah To love, love, yeah To love, yeah I needed to lose you to love me...

“See that’s just it… I know you love me… I love you too… but… I thought you loving me was enough, at least… until… you said the things you did… now I know you’re sorry... and I don’t doubt that you do love me but… I started hating myself again when you said those things and it made me realize that... I need to love me too, I need to start loving myself… and I didn’t love myself when I was with you. I let you do that for me, and… I can’t do that anymore. It’s not fair to you, and not good for me.” You loved him, you truly did love him but at the same time you needed to give yourself time before you could go back into a relationship, especially with him.

Bakugou was an extremely flawed person and although he was honest and you believed every word he said, you didn’t think it was a good time to go back to him.

And he knew it, but it didn’t stop the tears from coming but he stubbornly willed them back as he swallowed hard. He tried so hard and he wasn’t giving up yet, but he knew that you didn’t want to get back together with him. Worse, he made you hate yourself for a moment because of what he said and what he had done to you too, so… maybe you were better off without him. He’d rather you love yourself first because you were the best thing he’d ever had.

To love, love, yeah To love, love, yeah To love, yeah

“Fine then…” He tried to sound bitter, but he was just miserable and he did understand even if he was really hurt right now and knew that this was nobody’s fault but his. “I don’t fucking deserve you anyway… you’re… too good for me…” Bakugou muttered as he forced back all the emotion until he felt you kiss him suddenly on the cheek, making him gasp a bit.

“It’s okay… we all make mistakes. We’re human, that’s what we do. So… don’t beat yourself up.” You said to reassure him although it didn’t make him feel any better as he pulled you into a sudden, tight hug as you closed your tearful eyes and hugged him back, feeling his tears on your shoulder as your arms tightened around him so you and he could savor each other’s warmth just one more time

Neither of you truly wanted to pull away, it was almost too painful but you knew that it was for the best. You had started learning how to love yourself more, and you had to put yourself first more, and he knew that. And Bakugou also knew that he needed to work on himself too, and maybe he’d be a better boyfriend to you someday.

And now the chapter is closed and done To love, love, yeah To love, love, yeah To love, yeah..

“Good night Katsuki.” You said quietly to him as you pulled away with misty (E/C) eyes as he glumly looked at you, cupping his cheeks to wipe the tears away from his red eyes.

“Good night (Y/N).” He said as calmly as possible, and refused to cry in front of you (again) as he watched you slowly walk away. The two of you shared a small wave before you turned away, inhaling and exhaling deeply as you walked away for good.

You and Bakugou would at least be friends, and that was good enough for both you and him, even if he did rush over to his room to sob into his bed afterwards now that he had officially lost you. 

He loved you, he still loved you...

You loved him too, you still loved him, but you needed to love yourself too. Even if it meant losing him.

And now it's goodbye, it's goodbye for us...

[magniloquent-raven]

so, uh, this fic is inspired by this post. cuz @bambixxblue tagged it as billy/steve and the idea lodged itself in my brain. so here y’all go, pls enjoy

----

Valentine’s Day was a month ago. Steve had, on a whim, bought a box of chocolates. The heart-shaped box kind. It was a deep shade of red, and, because he wasn’t drunk when he bought it, the least frilly one he could find. 

It was a completely normal thing to do in early February. Especially for a guy like Steve. He might have been dethroned and dumped for the school creep but he was still rich and good-looking, people expected him to be putting himself out there. It had been months since he and Nancy broke up, enough time for him to have moved on. 

And he had. Moved on. Hence the Valentine’s Day gift. 

He was sweaty and anxious the whole time he was in the store, worried that someone might look at him and just know. Know who the chocolates were for. 

No one did, because it was a dumb thing to worry about, but he still left with his heart in his throat and his palms sweating through his gloves. 

He drove home a little faster than normal that day, and his hands shook as he unlocked the front door. 

Once Steve got inside he stared at the bag in his hand. Stared at it, and...god, this was such a stupid idea. This was the kind of shit he did for girls he liked, back before Nancy. He could just walk up to them in the cafeteria and their friends would giggle and blush and it was all so easy, but this...

He couldn’t do that with Billy. Nothing about this situation was easy. 

The chocolates ended up shoved in Steve’s sock drawer, and he spent the next month trying to forget the whole thing. 

Which is hard because he and Billy are friends now. At first it was a silent truce. A shared cig here and there while they were waiting for the kids. Then there was Billy’s muttered apology, and Steve’s tentative forgiveness. 

Then suddenly Billy was everywhere, and Steve...well, Steve apparently hadn’t learned much from getting his heart broken before because he fell hard. Again. 

So now they’re hanging out in Steve’s back yard sharing a blunt and he’s trying really hard not to think about how his mouth is touching something that Billy’s mouth also touched because he’s apparently been transformed into a twelve-year-old who’s never been kissed and gets worked up about shit like that. 

It’s, frankly, very embarrassing. 

“—and I told her, it wasn’t happening, but—” Billy’s rambling about something, smoke trailing from his lips, and Steve isn’t hearing a single word. “—Harrington?” Steve blinks a couple times. Refocuses. “You with me, man?”

“Um.”

Billy snorts, “Yeah, didn’t think so.” He’s grinning though, slow and lazy. He only smiles like that when he’s high, like he’s shed a couple layers of whatever keeps him wound so tight when he’s sober. “S’cool.”

“So, uh, what were you...?” Steve rubs the back of his neck, sheepish, and looks away. It’s easier to listen to Billy when he isn’t looking at him. His face is...distracting. His everything is distracting, actually.

“Ugh, fuckin’ Amy. Chick won’t leave me alone. It’s annoying.”

Right. Billy’s endless line of suitors. Steve’s favourite thing to talk about. He shrugs in a way he hopes is noncommittal. “She’s cute though.” He glances at Billy, who’s wrinkling his nose. 

“Why don’t you date her then,” he grumbles. 

“I did. Sort of. Sophomore year I bought her flowers for Valentine’s Day and then we hooked up a couple times.” He immediately regrets bringing it up. It reminds him of the aborted Valentine’s Day gesture stuffed in his dresser. Thinking about it ever is awkward, but doubly so when Billy’s sitting right next to him.

“Right, forgot you used to do that stuff.”

“What stuff?”

“Girls.”

Steve chokes on his spit. “You’re an asshole,” he coughs, while Billy cackles at him and pats his shoulder. 

“Yeah,” Billy hums. His expression settles into something more pensive. “You didn’t do anything this year though. You’re not still hung up on Wheeler are you?”

“No!” he says it too quickly, too vehemently. Billy raises his eyebrows. “I mean—I—I’m not. I was gonna do something but—” Steve’s whole face feels like it’s on fire and he bites his tongue. Literally. He clenches his jaw to keep any more words from coming out. Billy’s hand is still on his shoulder and it feels like a lead weight. 

“Oh yeah?” His voice is light but Steve can feel Billy’s fingers tighten on his sleeve, clutching at his shoulder. Steve’s brain goes a little fuzzy. “Why didn’t you?”

He cannot have this conversation. He can’t. It shouldn’t happen. He repeats it, in his head, panicking and anxious, guts in a knot, but the words slip out anyway. “No point. It...wouldn’t have gone over well.”

“Come on, King Steve’s afraid of a little rejection now?” 

Yes. Terrified. 

Maybe it’s the weed making him stupid. Or maybe he just wasn’t that bright to begin with. Or maybe monster hunting has made him reckless even in the face of fear, because he stands then, tells Billy to wait and walks into the house.

His body feels numb. There’s nothing but the roar of his heartbeat and a sick, anxious twist in his stomach.

The box is a little squashed. There’s a crease in the cardboard lid, a jagged line across the length of it. 

It feels like he’s barely had time to blink before he’s in his back yard again, looking down at Billy. He’s sitting on one of the lounge chairs, blinking at Steve. His button-up is askew, hanging off to one side and half unbuttoned, his eyes are a little bloodshot, his hair is tangled from the breeze, and Steve’s never seen anyone more beautiful. 

He drops the box in Billy’s lap.

“There’s no note or anything. I...didn’t think I’d actually...It’s been sitting in my sock drawer for a month because I was too chickenshit to tell you that I—anyway, that’s for you. It’s for you, ok? And that’s why I didn’t do anything for Valentine’s Day, because I’ve liked you for months and I knew it was stupid to do anything about it, but, well, no one’s ever accused me of being smart.” Steve lets out shaky breath that’s half sigh, half self-deprecating laugh. He feels like he’s about to shake apart, he’s trembling so hard. 

Billy hasn’t said anything. He’s staring at the box in his lap, putting his hands around it real careful like he’s afraid to break it. Or afraid it’s going to explode. Honestly, Steve can’t read how he’s feeling about the whole thing but he’s bracing himself for the worst when Billy finally looks at him, wide-eyed. “You...I...” he trails off, then shakes his head, laughing. 

And...it’s not the worst thing that could have happened. But it still hurts. Steve’s getting ready to bail so he can cry himself to sleep when Billy stands up, a weird look in his eye. “Wait here,” he says, and walks off. Which. What.

Forty-five excruciatingly long seconds later Steve—who hasn’t moved, can’t, he’s panicked and frozen—feels a hand on his shoulder.

Billy’s back, and...

He shoves something crumpled and pink into Steve’s hands. 

“That’s been in the glove box of my car for a month.” It shows. The edges are bent and there’s a split up one side of the lid. There’s a bow on it, squished beyond saving, with a little card hanging off it that says pretty boy in smudged ink. “Couldn’t keep in in the house ‘cause I got drunk and fuckin’ wrote on it, like an idiot,” Billy’s fidgeting with his hands, not looking at Steve.

He looks nervous, even though Steve was the one who brought this shit up in the first place, even though Billy already knows Steve has feelings for him. Even though Billy Hargrove never gets nervous. 

Steve’s heart is so full it hurts. “I kind of love you,” he blurts, too loud and extremely unsmooth. He can’t feel embarrassed about it though, because Billy finally looks at him and the look on his face takes Steve’s breath away. 

He’s got this tiny little smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, and his eyes are wide and wet and hopeful, and who gave him the right to have eyes that blue, and his freckles—

Billy’s standing a lot closer than he was before, and Steve’s pretty sure he’s forgotten how to breathe entirely by this point. Which is fine, because he can feel Billy’s hand sliding across the back of his neck, threading through his hair, and if this is how he dies then so be it. 

And then Billy presses a kiss to Steve’s cheek, to his nose, his forehead, so softly, cradling his face like it’s something precious and Steve is so happy he could cry. 

“Oh,” he breathes, quiet, afraid to break the moment. 

Steve can feel Billy’s smile again his cheek, “Yeah,” he says, breath hot in Steve’s ear.

He doesn’t say anything else. Doesn’t need to. Steve pulls him close and kisses him soundly and he knows he’s loved too.

[rungalwaysheretolisten]

Armada Review episode 9-13

I am putting the read more so that you do not have to read all of this if you do not want to. This is a review for episodes 9-13  season 1 and again, a reminder, these are my thoughts, if you don’t agree with what I have to say that fine but please respect my thought and opinions on what I think about the serious.

Okay so we at the end of this season which mean will be going into season 2 and oh boy I am hipped because that things started to fall into place and kinda where I watch the serious more. But where not here to talk about season 2 and we not here to talk about season 1 as a whole, that in another post which here is the link if you want to read the summer of my review for the whole season as a whole and what I think was good, what need to be fix and what things really made it good or bad.

Anyway, so here the review for 9-13 starting with.

season 1 episode 9 Confrontation:

Okay, so this is the episode that come back from a previous episode of which was call Carnival, and if you read my review on that episode that was the episode that was just not a good episode in my opinion. So you think I would hate this episode too. No, it not that bad and in fact it make more of a point of why that episode was pointless. So it pick up with the bullies Billy and Fred, talking about seeing the Autobots and them talking about how they might be evil or not good, and them saying some thing about them being from the future. Which just made me laugh and insert joke here: 

I know I’m a nerd.

But it was mostly them talking about what happen and how no one, saw anything that day. Even thought I call bull shit on that, but still the bullies see are young main children hero heading to the Autobot base and try to follow them, before all of the kids are confuted with Cyclonus, who kidnaps the the bullies, which turn make the Autobot have to go and get them, they ask for the min cons they say no, they fight. Which end up with the other main kids and bullies getting taken hoisted by Megatron, which in turn force them to have to give up there min cons to save the kids, however Rad is able to use Laserbake to shock Megatron into drop the other kids expect himself, which then Fred, fight back with Laserbeak and even ask Megatron min con why they can’t be friends which stunts him because I guess he never thought about that? And then it end with Hotshot kick Fred out of Megatron hand saving him and having the Depections retreat. Fred and Billy are welcome into the team, even thought they are later not show in this season expect till the last of this season episode 13 Swoop. 

So overall this episode has some pro and cons to it. The pros, I like that they show that this kid can get kidnap by the Depections and that even thought technically Fred and Billy are not on the Autobot team or with the other kids Optimus still calls them his kids and want to project them and the Autobots care about them too. I also thought it was interesting about Fred talking to the Megatron min con not only is that brave to do but this could have gone into a very interesting scenario, does the min con really follow Megatron because it wants too or does it do it out of fear, which you could say he does do it out of fear but he almost seem like he could have made a choose to not listen to Megatron. 

Which if they had gone that route, rather then having Fred get upset and leave, I think it would have been interesting to see what Megatron does and how he act to a min con not listening or obeying him. He already wanting more power and to control the min con, to just have one not obey him, would have show us that the min con have in fact choose and even could have show what Megatron would do to a min con who didn’t listen to him. They could have even gotten dark and crush the min con and that would have made interesting impact to the serious. 

However, they didn’t do that but if they had, I think it would be just amazing to see them dare to do something like that to a min con during the first season. I mean we do see him later in this season forcing a min con to wake up, but to see him kill one would just be interesting. 

So the cons, this episode had too many back and for, kids are kidnap, then they are not, and then they are again. They don’t fight for every long and I feel like the other kids were a little to mean to Fred and Billy in the began when Alexia ask if they were going to join them and they laugh it off as if they are not important. I am summing they are for jokes. But honestly, I think if any character should be treat with more repeat it Fred, he always the butt of the joke about bring fat but he really has a good heart and I just feel bad that he treat so wrong. Maybe that why I somewhat like this episode but at the same time didn’t think this is one you need to see. The only reason to see it would be because you would need to know why Fred and Billy are know part of the Autobot team. Other then that it an episode you could skip. 

The next episode however, oh boy here we go!! 

Season 1 Episode 10 Underground: 

Oh my god, this was the episode that I love the most only because of one reason and one reason only. It gave us Smokescreen!!

No, no, not that Smokescreen, that from Prime.

Yes!! This beautiful old guy that I like to call grandpa of the team and you can not tell me otherwise. That what he is to me and always will be! He is the wonderful commandment of Kup and Ratchet or any older mech from the transformers serious and I just love him so much! 

But I getting off track, so this episode is about there being a min con in the city subway, the Autobot, children and Depiction are looking for the min con down in the subways. The children fine the min con on their own, are attacked by the min con that the Depiction told to search by themself because they can’t really transformer down in the subway like the Autobots can. 

The children run from the min con and some mysterious robot, that they children think it might be a Depiction when it only are good old friend Smokescreen who come to save the children from the Depiction who tried to kill them to get the min con, which cause them to get buried by rocks, Cyclonus get his first min con which is somewhat strong but isn’t really that as strong as Starscream. They retried and the Autobot go to save the kids only to see there good old friend Smokesceen has project the children and has finally reunited with the Autobot after he got separated from them when they first when to come down to earth and is know part of the Autobot team!

This episode start off a bit slow but it is worth it at the end to fine out that we get a new Autobot join the team, and this is where the serious become really inserting because of reason I will later talk about in other season to come as why this become inserting and make the show really good.

 For know Smokesceen off the bat, has this old man, won’t take shit from anyone, and is a really close friend to everyone, he also a very good fighter and I just love his voice, it the type of voice that sound very kick ass old man voice that you get from a lot of characters in show. It just a good voice that fix the character so well. I just loved how he fight with his hook and he just is overall a good interaction to talk about other Autobot past as well as being helpful for in the next episodes with fighting the Depiction because they are know out number with this new addition to the team.  So I do recommend this episode just because it bring in a very cool and wonderful character to the mix!

The next episode is season 1 episode 11 Ruin

This episode was really interesting and began to bring up a lot of question which I loved so much!

So the Autobots get this messaged from a hologram of a girl from a ancient city that has sank along time ago. They messaged at the began is asking for help, they go down to the city and are right way having to fight the Depection while Optimus who has the children, get shot at and has to quickly bring them into the city before he leave to fight the Depection while the chidren have to go into the city because they have to look for the min con. While they are there, they fine out the truth of why their city was sank to the ground and discover a truth about how powerful the min con are especially the min cons that form the Star Saber and how dangerous it is for them to be in the wrong hands.

 The Depection get one of the min con that forms the Star Saber and The city falls and get distorted and leave Carlos heart broken about not being able to save the pretty hologram girl who he was very much wanting to save her image and help her from being erased, which then Rad comforts him and tell him that he might see her again some day. 

So, first I just want to point out this, I was looking at the wiki for Carlos and the first thing it has on there for an instruction to him is this: 

If you having a hard time reading it, I’ll just get you to the point you to the words that is very cringe and focus on this pacific episode. “Fantasizes about holographic dead girls” no joke, that is what it say! 

It blow my mind that is the instruction to Carlos in the wiki has for poor Carlos and I want to defined him on this because this is a bad instruction to a character that isn’t really that bad. First it is only one girl not girls! He not think about hologram girl all the time, just one.

Second Carlos, just is a kind and caring person who just wanted to keep her image alive. He wasn’t fantasying about her because he thought she was beautiful, even thought she is and he did like her look. I think there was more to it then just that. He wanted to save her from being erase and forgot by time.  He wanted to make her last moments not so sad and painful, even if she not real and is only a hologram. Yes, this serious can be corny and silly, but Carlos, just care about her and want to saver her that it.

Other then that this episode was good, and it help bring around the idea about maybe no one should be controlling the min cons and that there might be more to the story then what the children or audience know. We can’t just assume that what the Autobot are doing better then what the Depection are doing. Yes, they wear the end and purple badges but there more to it then just that and this episode and the next one, it wonderful bring that up and make you question what they are doing.

With that said in the next episode Season 1 episode 12 Prehistory

In this episode Rad start question the Autobot about why they need the min cons. He ask why they can’t just stop fighting and why do the Autobot get to make the choose and not the min cons. Which then Optimus Prime, start talking about the history of their war, about foreshadowing a big mystery about the min cons that they just came out of the blue and that they where very strong and where stared to be use by the Depections and other to fight in the war. He talk about sending them away, and later in the show, they another signal for a min con which is most like the Star Saber that has been foreshadowing for some time again and they go to get it off of an amusement park that as a volcano that is active and is going off. The Depection and Autobot start fight, the children hide with the autobot min cons, until the see the min con in the volcano and the min cons that are working with the Autobot finally start help and make the Rad see that the min cons do in fact have a choose to fight with the Autobot or not. 

After a while they are able to get the min con and finally are able to convents the children to keep believing in them and trusting what they are doing is right.

This episode brought a lot of question and also made me think about things. On one hand, yes what the Autobot are doing is right, they trying to save the min cons from going into the wrong hands, but also at the same time the problem raise with them want to use them to project them, and yes, the min cons that are working with the Autobots do want to help but it does set up a lot of question if what they are doing is right and if when everything is over, will thing be change or will they turn on the min cons. 

It really make you think with both of these episode together about if the Autobots are really good or not, and why they are still fight for so long before the min cons came into being, they say the Deceptions were righting to gain power, but because I have read mtmte and other comics it make me think that maybe Optimus is somewhat make the story a bit more different then it really is, honestly I think the Depections want to be treat equality and the Autbots didn’t want that again we don’t get the side of the story from the Depections and even if we did we wouldn’t be sure if we could turn Megatron to tell the story correctly or not, maybe Starscream would but it bring up a question about trust in story and what other say. This episode is really intresting and I love to know what you think, do you think Optimus might have been elaborating the story a bit or do you think he was being honest?

Finally we get to the last episode of the season and the one of most turning point of the serious. 

Season 1 episode 13 Swoop

In this episode the Depection figure out a way to brake into the base and try to steal the two min cons that make the Star Saber, the Autobot try to project them with there base, meanwhile Fred and Billy get caught up in all of this when there being show around which cause the Autobots to lower there defeats because they have to project the kids from getting hurt, the other Alexia, Carros and Rad go to save Fred and Billy from getting hurt and are even able to trick Cyclonus in a very claver way. Which then the Autobot have to face off with each Depection to get them either trap, hurt or even both, to keep them from getting the min cons.

However, Megatron is able to make them form into the Star Saber but luckily Hotshot is able to not only use the min cons but also us it to damaged Megatron a little bit before he retires and the Autobot know have the powerful Star saber which is given to Hotshot to use to fight the Depections. Megatron scream that he will get them next time you know team rocket style and that is the end of the season!! 

So with this episode how did I feel well. 

It was okay! It wasn’t as good as the other once before it, but for the finally, it was a good episode to end on. It show the Autbots how they would handle if the Depections did brake into their base. How each one use there strangest and teamwork to keep everyone safe. Even the kids thought of a great idea that was very good way to get ride one of the Depections. Optimus and Megatron had a good fight and I thought it was great that Optimus didn’t get the Star Saber and Hotshot was the one to use it because he was able to use his skill and the in encouraging of the kids to fight Megatron. I also thought it was so cool to see Megatron antler be cut off like that showing how strong that sword is and how embarrassing that has to be get his ass kick not by Optimus but by young Hotshot. So overall this is a good episode to end the serious and wrap up everything nice for the most part and really hypes you up for the next season.  

So, I do recommend this episodes the biggest one I think not to miss are the episode 10-13 just because they bring the whole serious together and it just a lot of fun. The animation is good in this episode too, even thought there are some funny moment with the animation but mostly there really well draw and the music is good too. Overall yeah, I say go watch this episode sometime soon because there worth watch them and I had a lot of fun rewatching this episode. It brought me back to my childhood and why I love Transformers so much. 

[zathuraroy5]

Supernatural Rewatch : 1x5

oooo Bloody Mary episode!!!

It’s really weird seeing the beginning now with the preteens daring each other. They look so YOUNG. When i watched this for the first time I was a teenager. I remember thinking the girls looked average and the teenagers looked so much older. Now I’m like 0.0 they’re all babies.

Also why does that house have so many mirrors.

Poor Sammy still having nightmares.

Hey it’s Billie’s evil sister in Charmed!!

Aww Dean trying to reassure the kid that it’s not her fault :((( He’s so fucking sweet from the get go. @adhdeancas said “it’s the parent-coding” and I died.

Hey I think the second victim (teenage girl) was listenning to Linkin park.

Jesus DEAN. So at 18:10 Sam has a night vision camera, Dean turns his back and does the “looking over my shoulder but showing my butt thing” and then SAYS “Do I look like Paris Hilton?” like duuuude come on.

So interesting observation, which I don’t know what it means for 2005, but so far in the three episodes that have cops, two of them have a black cop. Which talks to Dean. And Dean talks back to. So like I said, don’t know what it means, but it’s there to ponder.

Ok so apparently the writers have either no imagination or no sense of continuity or both (well, we know the answer) because the girl who is helping them? And might be the next victim? Billie’s evil sister in Charmed? Her name in this is CHARLIE. I’m not even joking.

Ok so I have SO MANY issues with them insinuating that it’s the girls fault that her boyfriend committed suicide. While they explain later that it’s more the guilt and the secret that does it for the ghost, still made me really uncomfortable.

Like here, Dean says it, “Well it’s not really her fault…” and Sam says “The guilt is enough for the ghost” and Dean is like “I guess…”. And. It just made me think of this post going around about how Dean is more sympathetic towards “convicts” and Sam is more sympathetic towards monsters. And I mean. Case 1 here in S1:E5.

Why does this antique store have so many mirrors. Almost breaks suspension of disbelief. 

Oh fuuuckk I forgot Sam had visions of Jess dying days before it happened. Shit balls.

Also I figured it out guys. The boys have such shitty luck because they smashed so many mirrors in this episode. 600 years of bad luck.

Also here we have Episode 5 defining the rest of the show: Sammy on not telling Dean his secret “You’re my brother, and I would die for you, but there are some things I need to keep to myself.”  *eyeroll to the back of my head*

Conclusion: they have so much repressed shit I’m gonna have an aneurysm. (yes there’s a pun/joke here)

[julessworldd]

Kiddies Guns n Roses x reader

Based on a picture I posted from Instagram: Slash, Axl, Steven are drawn as toddlers and leave Duff and Izzy normal. I decided to add a reader, who is in a poly relationship with the band(I decided on a twist). Stay tuned to see if Izzy catches a child abuse case because of Axl being worse as a toddler. Sorry, if this isn’t the best I’m starting to get my groove back to write. Hope y'all enjoy!

  The morning sun shined through the curtains, taking me out of my sleep. My hand ran over to the pillow beside me, I rolled over to see a tuft of blonde hair. “Morning Duffy” No response. I walked downstairs to Duff in his boxers, at the stove, “I thought you were in bed” “Oh hey, no I got hungry” Duff smiled as soon as he saw me. “Mhm, when did Stevie come to your bed?” I asked as I snuggled into his back, leaving small kisses. “I’ve been down here for 40 minutes, he wasn’t there when I woke up” Duff turned a pancake over. “Morning” Izzy grumbled. “Morning Iz” I walked over to him and kissed his temple. Duff had breakfast done, already on plates. “Breakfast!” He yelled like he did every morning.  Izzy and I had started eating and finished in 20 minutes, still no one.  “I’m gonna go see what’s going on? This is too spooky” I walked upstairs. I knocked on Axl’s door, “Hey Ax, breakfast is done, gonna get cold if you don’t hurry”.  Nothing, I walked in and saw red hair peek out of the covers. Axl stays hot, why was he under the covers? I lifted the covers and gasped. Axl was a toddler, still had his long hair, T-shirt he slept in,swallowed him. “Hey Ax, what happened buddy?” I asked gently, nudging him awake. He jumped as he saw me, “My name is Billy” Axl/Billy said in a kid voice. “Duff!!” I yelled. Two boys ran in, “You okay, baby?” Izzy asked. “Holy shit” He said as he saw Axl as a toddler in his bed.  “Grab him, we’ll go see what’s up with Slash and Steven,” Duff said. “Come here, Bill”, I held my hands in front of him, Axl crawled over to me.  I met Izzy with Slash, Duff with Steven in their arms. 

We figured out that Axl was shy, but loved to be held, Steven had always been a happy person, Slash had his english accent and was quiet. “Duff, we have to find them clothes that will fit, Axl almost tripped crawling over to me”, I said, petting Axl’s ginger hair. Duff had his own problem as Steven tried crawling in his hair to be closer. Steven remembered Duff and how they were close. Izzy and I went to the store to get clothes for the boys for a few days until we figured out how to get them to adults again. Duff had found a box of toys, the people who used to live here left behind. Slash was playing with a T- rex, Steven was still on Duff’s lap, Axl laid on his tummy, watching Tv. “Hi boys” I smiled as Axl ran up to me, giving me grabby hands. “Hi, baby boy” I kissed his cheek. Axl hid in my hair as I sat the bag at Duff’s feet.  “Izdee” Axl whined. “You want Izzy?” I asked him, he nodded starting to get fussy. Izzy held Axl, but wasn’t sure about it. “Iz, he won’t bite,” I said, picking up Slash. “Hi, uh Saul” Almost forgot he didn’t get his nickname until later. He stared at me like he was trying to figure out who I was, his big brown eyes looked at me. “Hi, who are you?” He asked snuggling his head into my neck, while looking up at me. “I’m Y/n” 

Duff and I attempted to make lunch, but Steven and Slash wouldn’t leave us alone long enough. “Boys, come here,” Izzy said. The pair waddled over to him as he guided them back into the living room. “What are we gonna do about them? You have tour in a month” I asked looking at Duff. “Have no clue, we don’t know how they got turned that way”,Duff sighed.  “Maybe, Endora from Bewitched visited us last night”, I smirked. Duff gave me a go to hell look, “Sorry, not the time”, I said.  I felt a tug on my leggings, I looked down it was Axl. He looked like he was about to cry, “Hey, buddy what’s wrong?” I asked as I picked him up. He sniffled and rubbed his face, “Saul hit me, I- I hit him back and Izdee yelled at me” “Billy, we don’t hit people, it's not nice. Izzy shouldn’t have yelled at you. Wanna stay with us? Y/n will hold you”, Duff looked at Axl and smiled. I grabbed Axl as he clinged to me. He was twirling a piece of my hair, just smiling at me. He squealed as Duff tickled his foot and hid behind me slightly. “Prettdee” Axl smiled while looking at me, he blushed when I asked him who was pretty.  “Do we have to fix them to adults? He’s so cute” I pouted at Duff. “Yes, Izzy and I can’t be a two man band, babe” Duff said. “He’s hardly this clingy, I like it” I whined and hugged Axl to my chest. “Steven, don’t pull my hair! Slash stop walking in front of me” Izzy groaned as he walked in with Steven perched on his shoulders, Slash trying to climb his legs. “Hey baby” I smiled. Izzy sat the boys at the table and approached us. “Noo, stay away” Axl whined while hiding in my hair and clung to me. Izzy looked like he had been burned. “You yelled at him, his feelings are hurt, Izzy” I said. Duff took Axl to his chair, so grateful, Axl was starting to hurt my hip. “Tell him you were trying to correct him and that you’re sorry and will play with him after lunch. I wanna hold baby Slash, his hair so cute” I kissed his cheek. “Fine, but the little shit hit and bit me” Izzy grumbled. The boys got done eating and I grabbed tiny Slash and started giving him kisses around his cheeks, “It tickle” Slash squealed. “You’re so cute though, baby” I said, rubbing his belly as I moved him to my hip.  “Juice” Steven said, looking up at Duff. “We don’t have juice in this house” Duff said. “We do too, babe bottom draw” I said,  not noticing Slash’s tiny hand trying to grab my boob. “Slash, get out of there” I yelped as I finally noticed him. “Slashhh?” He turned his head. “Saul” He pointed to himself. “Right, sorry Saulie” I kissed his hair. Duff decided that they needed a nap. Izzy had Axl laying on his chest, Duff had Steven who was clutching a strand of black hair, I finally gave in to Slash to hold my boob. Boy had always been a boob lover, he wasn’t kidding.  “Aw Izzy, he likes you again” I smiled looking at the pair, Izzy was shhing Axl, guess he was stirring. “Yeah, guess he does” Izzy grinned. 

Slash and I had rolled facing the couch, “Y/n” “Mhmm” I mumbled. “Dinner is ready,” Izzy said. “Okay be there in a minute”, I said getting up and grabbing a sleeping Slash “Hey baby, wake up. Time to eat” “Momma” Slash grunted. “I’m not momma, Saul” I sat him next to Steven. I bent down to give Steven a kiss on his cheek, “Hi Stevie” Steven just looked at me. “My luck, you wouldn’t remember me even though you snuck into bed this morning”  I pouted and sat next to Izzy and Axl.  Izzy started kissing my neck and hit my sweet spot. “Mhm Izzy, knock it off” I whined. Izzy didn’t listen, I watched Axl crawl over from his chair and hit Izzy’s crotch. “Owww! The hell, Y/n?” Izzy pushed me away. “I didn’t hit you, Iz” I said pointing down to Axl in my lap. Izzy looked down to see a tiny pissed off Axl holding a hand protectively on my chest.  “Dinner is served” Duff laid a plate in front of me and kissed my cheek. “Thanks Duffy, looks- hey not for you” I grabbed Axl away from my plate, little shit tried to steal my mac n cheese. Axl giggled, “Y/nn. Can I have a bite?”  I looked at the plate of grilled chicken, mac n cheese, mashed potatoes then Axl again. “Here Ax” Duff sat a plate in  front of him. “Hey do you think they remember how to feed themselves?” I asked Duff. “I cut their chicken into tiny pieces so maybe they’ll shovel it like always,” Duff said, sitting Steven and Slash’s food down. ‘Hey blondie, where’s my food at?” Izzy grumbled. “Here Satan.” Steven started crying, “Hey buddy, what happened?” Duff rubbed his back. “Saul threw chicken at me and it was hottt” Steven whined. “Saul, don’t throw food at anybody else” Izzy said, giving Slash ‘the look’. It scared me and it wasn’t towards me. Why was it also really hot? 

Duff and I were in the bathroom with the boys and the tub running water. One of the boys tugged my sleeves, “Y/n, do we have to take a bath? I smell fine” Axl asked. “You have dirt from playing outside, dried ketchup on your cheek, and a leaf in your pretty red hair. Yes you have take a bath” I said, taking his t-shirt off. “This is no fun” Axl pouted with his arms crossed over his chest. Slash was clinging to Duff’s arm, “Nooo! That water is gross. Don’t make me Duff”  “The water is clean, just has Steven and Axl in it and they’re okay” Duff said, prying Slash off his arm. “I don’t want bath with them” Slash whined. “Then with who?” Duff asked. I already knew. “Y/n” Slash gave a toothy grin to Duff. “No” Duff sat Slash in the water and started scrubbing his back. “Sorry Saulie, maybe another time” I grinned pouring water onto Steven’s head. “You’re prettdee” Steven turned his head to look at me, “Thank you, Stevie. Stay still so I don’t get shampoo in your eyes” I said shampooing his head. Slash was in a towel staring at Steven and I. “What’s the matter, Saul?” I asked. “Can you put my clothes on? I’m cold” Slash asked while petting my hair. “Let me get Stevie out and I will help you,” I said, bopping Steven’s nose. I guided Slash and Steven out of the bathroom. “You’re just gonna leave me in here with me?” Duff yelled. “He’s a baby, Duff”, I yelled back. Steven had dog pj’s on and Slash little dinos on his. I decided to put them in Axl’s room. I didn't want Slash to find his snakes in his room.  “Hi, Y/n. I’m clean now” Axl said perched on Duff’s shoulders. “Hi baby, you are. Come on” I said lifting him off of Duff. “What jammies do you want?” I asked, holding him on my hip. Axl couldn’t decide I put him in duck pj’s. “Alright bedtime. No goofing around just sleep okay?” I said standing at the door. “I need a kiss” Axl whined. “You already got one, Bill,” I said, shutting the door. Duff slammed me on the wall and started attacking my lips. “God, you’re so good with kids. It's hot” Duff said in between kisses.  Duff rolled off of me and was catching his breath again. “Love you” “Love you too, Duffy” I laid my head on his chest. Couple hours later, Duff was snoring and I wasn’t sleepy yet.  I knocked on Izzy’s door, heard his shower was on. Undressing again, I pulled the curtain back. Izzy didn’t hear or see me. I started kissing his back and shoulders, “Oh hey baby” Izzy turned around. Izzy had to carry me to his bed, “Sorry for being too rough” “It's okay, you know I like it rough, especially with you” I kissed his nose.  Izzy put his Rolling Stones shirt on me before dozing off.

“Izzy wake up!” Axl yelled. “Ax, it's too early for your shit go away,” I groaned, snuggling closer to Izzy. “Okay, care to explain why my bed has the baby version of my guitarist and drummer.” Axl said, cocking his hip out. “Holy shit! How did you turn back to normal?” Izzy asked sitting up. Axl shrugged, “I don’t know, I woke up naked and had half of PJ’s on” “Aww those were so cute on you. Why did you have to turn back first?” I whined. “Izzy, do you have- Holy shit, you’re normal again” Duff said mid-yelling. “Are they still babies?” Izzy asked. “Yeah” I climbed out of bed but fell from the soreness from my legs to my crotch. “Fuck” “Did she?” Duff asked. Izzy nodded, helping me up. “Y/n?” A tiny Slash waddled to me. “Yeah?” I asked looking down at him. “I’m hungry and there’s a weird man in bed” Slash said. “Steven’s back” Duff said. I couldn’t walk so Izzy carried me to the kitchen while Axl held Slash. Slash was really cute as a baby like he is as an adult.  Steven was looking in the fridge, “Did you guys feed me yesterday? I’m starving.” “We did but Duff cut everything up so you wouldn’t choke” I said as Izzy sat me at the table. “Prettdee” Slash said as he held a piece of Axl’s hair. We all laughed. Steven wanted us to watch a movie with him, we all camped out in the living room. Someone shook me awake, “Piss off” I groaned. “Y/n, what happened?” Slash said. “Saul, go back and sleep on Axl’s chest earlier. It's nap time” I snuggled closer to Izzy. “Nap time. What I am 3? Slash asked. Then it hit me, he’s back to normal. “Slash!!” I jumped into his arms and held him close. “I missed you this size” “What is she talking about?” Slash asked. “Axl, I and you got turned into toddlers for whatever weird ass reason” Steven said. “Yeah all of yesterday Izzy, Duff and I had to take care of you guys. You had your english accent and didn’t understand why we called you  by your nickname” I said, while laying on Izzy’s shoulder. “Is that why I had dinosaur pj’s on?” Slash asked. “You put him in dinosaur PJ’s?” Izzy asked. “Yeah, Stevie had dogs and Axl had duck ones. I really wanted them in feetie Pj”s before they went back to normal. Forty bucks down the drain, we don’t have a baby running around here” I pouted. All the guys looked at each other and smirked, “What are you guys thinking? No, leave me alone” I locked eyes with Duff and had a sparkle in his eyes like always when he wants sex. I stood up but started to fall but Axl caught me, “I’m worn out, leave me alone. Watch a porno and circle jerk.”  The guys all laughed and Axl threw me over his shoulder, “Come on guys” They all followed Axl as he walked into his room, “What are you guys planning?” I asked as Axl sat me on the middle of his bed. They stared at me and smiled, “Are you gonna kill me now?” I asked.

All of a sudden, I was pinned to the bed by Izzy, the rest of the guys were kissing all over my body, laughing. “Izzy, make em quit. It feels like leeches are on me” I giggled as Duff peppered my face with kisses. Axl switched places with Izzy and I had Izzy kissing my chest. After ten minutes, they all quit.  “That was fun, again” Steven giggled. “No, it felt like leeches were attacking me” I whined climbing onto Duff’s lap. Izzy grinned. Axl sneezed and forgot to cover his mouth and it landed on Slash. “What the fuck?” Slash tackled Axl, the force of his movement made Axl’s bed break. Steven had fell on me, Duff broke my fall, “That’s not how I planned on breaking my bed, it involved Y/n” Axl said as Izzy rolled off of him. 

“Why did you have to turn back?” Izzy asked grumbling as he left the room.

Wonder how it go if it was Izzy, Duff and I who turned to toddlers?

[alias-b]

angel cake.

Summary: Former enemies, now friends and maybe lovers, Billy Hargrove and Evie Fenny start teasing in a church confessional. Things take a turn for the heated when Billy's imagination gets away from him. ~Also posted on my AO3

Billy/plus size!OC. Fucking in a confessional. Sin. Filth. Thanks for reading. Weird to write them romantically bc the start of the fic is Rough. They have work to do. Billy Being Nasty In Church. Teaser at later stuff for my new enemies to friends to lovers Billy/OC Fic, Sins of My Youth, that I want to start posting. XOXO.

Billy Hargrove x Evie Fenny

angel cake. 🍰

   “You really have to go to this thing?” Billy’s Camaro roared into a church parking lot. Looked out of place there. Multicolored tulips swept against the spring wind, too pleasant before the fender.

   “Told mom I’d help out. I’m not staying for the festivities, they just need extra hands setting up the food and Easter egg hunt.” Aviators flashed at Evie in the passenger seat.

   Billy with his arm propped in the window. Denim jacket and white button down tucked into tight jeans. Cigarette dangling out his lips. Exceptionally pretty, even against all the pastel flowers and banners set for the holiday. 

   “What a good daughter. Santa ought to put you on the nice list for sure.” He plucked the smoke out to exhale as she brought the car mirror down.

   “Hell, I forgot I had red on today.You have napkins in here?” She opened the glove box to sift through papers. Billy extended his arm.

   “Use the jacket, give me something messy to remember you by.” A wink followed before she took his wrist and smacked a ruby kiss into his forearm, printing the light wash. Eyes flicked as some of the red lipstick got swiped away, leaving a more pink tint behind.

   “Thanks, I guess.”

   “Red is the devil’s color,  Evangeline.” Came some mocking in a horrid southern accent. She scoffed with her eyes elsewhere.

   “You could always come help if you’re going to pout.” She dug around her purse.

   “Not pouting. Churches and I don’t mix. It’s the one thing dad and I agree on.” Billy pulled his shades down and folded them into his front pocket with the cigarettes. 

   “Well, pick me up in an hour, we’ll go catch something scary and sinful.” She applied chapstick and rubbed her lips together.

   “Sinful? I like that.” Billy’s fingers squeezed her thigh, hot on skin and just barely under the little black suspender skirt. Evie wore a brightly colored tee with sunflowers all over it. Her usual green bomber jacket covered in patches. “That new?”

   “The chapstick? No, it’s tinted and smells like watermelon though.”

   “Let me try.” Billy saw her offer the tube and instead pulled her in by the collar for a kiss. Mashing their lips together. He flicked his tongue out for good measure and heard her gasp against his ferocity. It still managed to catch her off guard. A light smack when he parted, tonguing his bottom lip. “Mm, tastes like watermelon too.”

   “Billy, there are people over there.” She pushed his wandering hand out of her skirt.

   “I’d like to see Jesus himself come out and...what the fuck is that?” Billy’s finger lifted so Evie followed it to see the Easter Bunny leaving a lone side door. Lavender fur with white tufts, huge goofy grin.

   “Yeah, they have someone dress up every year for when the kids arrive, which is in about sixty minutes, so I gotta go.” Evie had Billy’s wrist again to check the time. Pecked his cheek and shifting before he about howled. “What?” Her body jumped at the sound.

   “No fucking way!” Billy was scrambling out because the bunny head had come off so a quick smoke could be snuck around back. “No way! Hey, Harrington! That you, amigo? What’s up, doc?” 

   Steve spun on his heel, holding a cigarette in one hand and the bunny head under his other arm. His head fell back with a groan because Billy was leaning up against his chair, bent over to belly laugh.

   “Hargrove?” Steve looked mortified, but played tough. “Are they really letting you within five feet of a church?” Billy was too busy cackling to retort. Fist clenched and head resting upon his arm on the Camaro.

   “The fucking tail.” Billy wasn’t stopping so Evie crossed her arms.

   “What happened to Gary?” Evie approached Steve, head cocking. “Ignore Billy.”

   “I try to… And food poisoning. I dropped Dustin off at home yesterday to help Claudia out and she begged me last minute. I’m getting fifteen bucks for it though. Not bad for the Saturday before Easter.” He flashed a half smile. “Suit kinda smells like potpourri, I-...Is he gonna stop or what?” 

   “He’ll tucker himself out eventually.” Evie turned her head to see Billy unable to get air. “Billy, take a breath already before you pass out!” A huge gulp followed. More wild laughter. “Jeez.”

   “I’m never gonna live this down, shit.” Steve mumbled around his smoke, flicking it. “Asshole.”

   “Might want to get back in, Pastor will have a cow if he catches you smoking in the suit.” Evie took the head to help Steve back into it.

   “See you, Hargrove. Remember to breathe, dick.” The bunny snuck back in the side door. Another round of laughs at the sight of the puffy tail.

   “I wanna kick his ass so bad. You don’t understand.” Billy stretched out, eyes watering and cheeks blushed. Freckles glowing.

   “You short circuiting still?” Evie peered down at her boots.

   “I don’t know what Easter is about, but that...was the best shit I’ve ever seen.” Billy snickered like a little boy with his hand in the cookie jar. Evie only rolled her eyes.

   “New beginnings, Billy.” Heels clicked up behind them so Billy straightened quick to get his composure.

   “Hey, mom.” Evie leaned out from behind the boy.

   Mona Fenny appeared from the main doors, her arms full of bags. Brightly colored plastic eggs packed with treats about to spill out. Hair pumped, unable to move, with a short 60s sheath dress clinging to her body. Yellow and orange print. Something that was definitely noted by the men around. Single and ready at all times. Evie felt her cheeks heat at her mother.

   “New beginnings, Miss Mona?” Billy repeated, one hand sliding into his jean pocket.

   “That’s what I always thought, sugar.” That southern twang thick beyond all reach.

   Billy always liked to poke fun at Evie, she had the slightest Louisiana touch to her voice that came out when she was in a more fiery disposition. She swore it wasn’t true.

   “Evie, they’re trying to get the dessert table set up. I didn’t realize Billy was joining us.” Mona continued.

   “Oh, I-”

   “You know, Billy was actually telling me he’s never been to a real Easter gathering before. Not a church event.” Evie’s sly smile crossed and he shot her a look. “I’m sure those big, strong arms you got would really help out setting up.” Evie came to him and gave his bicep a pat.

   “That’s lovely, Billy. You know the kids just love this event, fun in the sun and more food than you’ll ever eat. Go on inside, you two. We have decorations to get going.” Mona clicked away, peppy in stride.

   “I had a hair appointment.” Billy hissed through his teeth when Evie’s mother was gone.

   “You want to tell my mother that you’re going to get your hair done somewhere that isn’t her salon?” Evie’s lips pressed. Billy’s face scrunched because she had him there. “I panicked, the people here are too much. Please stay.”

   “Your mom never turns her volume down, does she? Looking more like a brunette Sharon Tate than a Dolly Parton.” Billy locked his car, stuffing the scorpion keychain into his pocket.

   “Been like that since dad left, she’s...on the market. Trying to feel good. People notice and they say some not great stuff. She went from dressing like a nun to a model overnight.” Evie was holding her arms close to her chest still, making this unconscious patting motion Billy always noted like she was trying to console herself.

   “Really bugs you, what people think.”

   “It’s a small town, it bugs everyone.” Evie turned, skirt flitting while her curls bounced. “Don’t like all these guys ogling my mom.”

   Doesn’t like that one might replace her dad. Evie peered back at Billy, lips pushed up to appear brighter. He decided he wanted to see her happier without force.

   “I’ll stick around. You owe me.” Steps followed. One hand gave her bottom a firm pat.

   “You know, the Easter Bunny has to do a dance before the festivities begin?” She whispered then. “It’s tradition.”

   Billy perked up like a dog.

   “Right, so, decorations?” He waltzed ahead with a giggling girl in tow. Spotted the moms passing boxes off. All stilling to see him there. Wind sweeping his blond locks like a beefcake out of a romance novel. Shirt open with his saint chain glinting upon his tanned chest. “Ladies.”

   “Hi, Billy.” Came the chorus.

   He ate that up a little. 

   Sunlight was barely felt through the spring breeze. Balloons and streamers glowed every direction. Twisted around Evie’s manicured fingers as she passed them up to Billy to be tied around the banner.

   “Feel like I might float away here.” The wind swept up her unruly curls as she smiled below when Billy peered to see her. Pink and violet balloons. Yellow streamers. She looked like a piece of decadent candy there. “What?”

   Billy snapped out of it.

   “Why do I have to be on the ladder?” He snatched another bundle of strings from her to tie them up.

   “I wore a skirt so I wouldn’t have to be.” Came the cheeky reply. Hawkins residents hurried all over to set up the grassy field.

   “Let’s switch. Although, the view here ain’t half bad. I can totally see down your shirt.” His tongue swept over eager lips as eyes lowered to her breasts. Brows furrowed to glare at him. It was striking how cute she was, even angry. High, apple cheeks and pillowy lips. The sun brought some gold into lush, dark curls. 

   “Jerk.” An arm hanging with streamers covered her chest. “We’re standing next to a church. Behave yourself, you’re fixing to get smited.”

   “God’s got bigger problems than me.” He shrugged, caught his tongue in teeth. Smirked. “Fixin’ to. Your Louisiana is showing.”

   “Shut it, I got too much family down there still. Sometimes it jumps out. I don’t have an accent.”

   “You so do. Just saying it’s cute.” He caught her cheeks flooding all strawberries and cream.

   “Hey, I have to keep my clinically unapproachable ice queen reputation. You’re not helping.”

   “Damn cute then.” Billy’s head cocked. A wink of those sinfully, long lashes. “Hand me another one.”

   Evie’s hand came to his to offer a new bundle of balloons.

   Green grass swept about as parents worked to hide eggs all over and a full spread of picnic food was set out on blue gingham tables. Kids started to pile in so Billy decided it was time to hide around the building after snagging the biggest piece of apple pie he could. Alone, they watched the crowds play beyond a row of vibrant tulips.

   “One fork?” Evie leaned up against the wall.

   “You had my tongue in your mouth this morning, don’t complain about sharing a fork.”

   “Fair enough.” She let him feed her a bite. “That wasn’t so bad, time flew. You want to jet?” A bouncy tune played as Billy craned his neck around the corner after a huge bit of pie. Evie followed his line of sight.

   “Easter is my new favorite holiday.” He let Evie snag the fork to finish off the slice, tossing the plate into the trash. Genuine laughter as Steve Harrington did a jig in his costume across the open field. Billy’s arm slid over Evie’s shoulders. “You think I can pay one of these kids to kick bunny in the nuts?”

   “We’re leaving… Before you traumatize some child.” She tugged at his wrist to sneak in a side door. “Left my coat and purse over here.”

   Absolutely empty and dim save for the morning sun spilling into stained glass. They passed rows of pews to the tables covered in empty boxes. Evie went for her purse and realized she already lost Billy, curiously rooting around.

   “Hey, don’t touch that.”

   “They actually have one of these things? I thought movies made this shit up.” Billy poked his head around the little confessional booth. Hardwood and sleek to touch. Ornate and out of place against bright blue wallpaper. Two doors on either side. “So, everyone’s planning on staying outside right? Should be entertained a few hours, hm.”

   He went in and a lock clicked.

   “Billy, hey.” Evie felt the urge to keep her voice low. “Get out of there. They actually don’t really use this thing anymore.”

   “Doesn’t get use, eh? Too bad.” His snicker was muffled. “Get in the other side, Angel, confess your sins.”

   “I’ll confess that I think the nickname is still silly.” She wiggled the handle and poked her head into the opposite side. Saw Billy’s pretty silhouette through the tiny mesh window. Both sides were cramped like an airplane bathroom.

   “Roomier than I thought.”

   “Some of us have hips here.” Evie huffed at him, the door shut while she slid inside. “Kinda creepy actually, let’s go.”

   “You gotta confess first, it’s the rule.” His wild curls flicked so she plopped into the wooden bench.

   “This is not even sexy, I feel like I’m about to be murdered here.” She pressed her hands on either wall.

   “Better confess quick in that case,” Billy leaned in, she saw his lashes flutter, “what color are your panties today?”

   “Billy.” She covered the mesh with one hand.

   “Do they match the bra?” He continued, voice lowering.

   “I’m not doing this.” Evie lifted her skirt and shifted a lacy pair of shorts aside to see. Billy’s breath drew heavier. “What’s it matter if they match?”

   “If they match, you walked into this church thinking you’d be getting some later.” He said that far too matter-a-factually. “Sinner. What color? Describe them exactly.”

   “You’re being gross.” She knew he heard the band of her little biker shorts snap. Caved. “Purple. Like a lilac.”

   “Cotton?”

   “...Satin.”

   A lengthy hum from Billy at that.

   “And the bra. I’m assuming the same.” He already heard Evie shuffling to check.

   “Ah, shit.” She let her shirt go and he chuckled. “I didn’t even plan that. I wasn’t thinking about it.”

   “Your subconscious knew, Angel. No denying it.” Billy propped his arm up.

   “Okay, what do you have on?” The challenge was easily met.

   “Nothing under the jeans, currently. You should try it.”

   “In a skirt? Without my little shorts? My thighs would rub, I’d be miserable.” Came a whine.

   “I’d massage your poor thighs, maybe blow the hot skin to cool it off if you like.” His suggestion wasn’t helpful. “Spread them and rub some ice to make you feel better. Few kisses all the way up.” That damn low baritone lingered upon the syllables like he might lick them. Evie gave a silent snort out her nose. “You’d probably squirm a little bit like you are now.”

   “I am not squirming.” Evie’s chest lifted, eyes turned to Billy’s outline.

   “Now, Angel, you can’t tell lies in here. The sins are just piling up for you today.” Billy peered around, couldn’t see much in here. Spotted her lips parting, but sound came out. “Betcha, you’re already soaked through those satin, lilac panties.” His purring was met with hard silence before a forcibly huff.

   “Billy...quit it.” She bit her lip this time sounding like she’d smiled. Billy spotted her cheeks lifting, full and blushed all pretty he figured.

   “I’ll confess, it took every ounce of fight in me to get you here on time. Lot of places in this town to stop and...park at for a bit. The one charming thing I discovered about this place.”

   “How sunny side up of you.” She hummed.

   “You would have let me have it because we would have parked for awhile. You’d be late. Probably left your wrecked panties in the backseat and walked around here with fireworks still going off under your skin. We both know it.” 

   “Probably wouldn’t have made it here at all.” Her slow reply was uttered and Billy grinned.

   “See, I behaved.” He got closer to the window. “Confess, Evie.”

   “Confess that you’re a total horn dog.” She drew in to meet him.

   “Confess what you want me to do to you in there.” Billy murmured. She blew a curl out her face at that. “I got it, I want you to be my first.” He’d offered that with huge, glittering eyes she’d caught the glint of. Eyebrows jumped.

   “What? Literally yesterday, we-”

   “I never fucked in a church before.” He got her eyes rolling hard, almost to the back of her skull.

   “Jesus Christ, Billy.” She covered the mesh again, heard him laughing on the other side.

   “Not the name you need to be moaning right now.” Billy smacked the window closed and came out. 

   “Finally, we can go-” Evie had the door open. Still blushing. Chest puffed. 

   Billy appeared from smoke, had his hands on either side before he pushed in. Catching her lips on the way until the door could shut behind them. Cupping Evie’s face so she pressed into the wall. Back of her legs hit the bench and managed to not buckle. Palms felt around the hardwood for something to grab for until fingers bunched up Billy’s jacket.

   She broke for air. Gulped on it before his tongue was back into her mouth.

   “We should…” Lips swelled with kisses. “Go to the car.”

   “Will you make that walk? I know I won’t.” Came the hushed reply. “We could cross something big off the bucket list.” Persuasive lips were already working on her neck, teeth tugged her ear and grazed back down. Billy got a handful of her tits and hummed.

   “Not...Not sure it’s on my bucket list.” She just held onto him. Knees wobbling as Billy massaged through the bra.

   “I’d add it now while you have time.” He pecked her throat. Felt the pulse under tender skin racing. “Confess.” It was a sinful purr. Evie’s head tipped back. Lungs starting to sputter. Billy made her heart a pile of volcanic mush.

   “What if someone comes in?” She let him tuck her curls aside. Lips on her cheeks and jaw. Finding her mouth again. Tasting sweet sugar from the apple pie they shared.

   “We’ll just have to keep it down and pray the party is entertaining enough to keep people outside.” He mumbled, coming out to pull the shirt from her skirt up over the pretty bra she had on. 

   Hands pulled her suspenders forth until Evie molded into him. Kissed back with the same fierce vigor he gave. Felt the chain around his neck while her fingers slipped under the collar of his shirt, four buttons already undone.

   The hard lines of his body sweltered with fire. Whatever resolve she might have had melted away completely. 

   Evie liked how he always cupped her face to look at her features close between steaming kisses. Fingers trailed to work her bra down just enough for her to spill into his touch. Into his mouth. Bruising suckles. Teeth edging across silken skin. Tongue swirling one dark, rosy nipple than the other as she tried to quiet herself and ran fingers into his gold mane. A hiss and Billy’s eyes lifted. Evie’s head was turned aside, teeth in her bottom lip. Eyes shut.

   “Cute when you try to hold it together.” Cool breath against her hard, wet nipple sent a vibration down her spine. Billy licked up her chest to inhale that amber perfume, a floral scent with a touch of vanilla from her lotion. Smelled lush to match him. She pushed his face back into her cleavage, partly to quiet him because he was too cocky.

   Chuckling and breathless, Billy came up to tease her lips. Twisting her nipples just so to elicit a sigh. Low and even, Billy ran his finger over her mouth.

   “Just confess, Angel, it’ll feel so fucking good when you do.” He caught her bottom lip and let it go.

   “Promise?” Evie’s lips parted involuntarily at his touch, let his finger stroke her tongue and slip out. 

   “I promise.” That same hand already hiked her skirt to tug at shorts until they came down. His finger inched under the waistband of her panties, teasing sensitive skin. She pressed into his body, vibrating for more. Swaying. Arms snug around his shoulders to stay upright.

   A shameless sound when her lips collided with his. Thigh hitching around his hips in a needy motion. Not shy about what she desired for one beat because he knew how to coax that side of her out. Billy teased lighter kisses, let his deft fingers dance along her inner thigh. Evie was stubborn and she knew what he wanted. 

  Confession.

   A growl rippled out her tense vocal cords. Trying to reel sound in despite Billy’s inherent ability to make her see new sparks of vivid neon colors here in pure darkness.

   “Okay…” She panted, pulling for him until their foreheads touched. “Okay.” A drunken moment where eyes could close. One beat of peace in obscenity. His free arm tightened around the small of her back so they were flush together. Perfect fit. Every curve to her body sloped easily into him. An almost Biblical fate because of how good they felt together. Evie parted her mouth to ghost it over his. “I sinned.”

   “Yeah?” Billy’s palm inched up to reward her sighs. A smirk crossed. “How’s that?”

   “Because I was hoping you’d pull over on the way here. Would have seen the new underwear in a better light. And I squirmed the whole way. Your loss.” All that cheeky strength simmered down when fingers pushed between thick thighs. Wet satin fabric slipped deliberately against her and Billy moaned at the mere feel. Rock hard.

   “Fuck, you’re soaked, Angel.” His tone thickened.

   Evie wasn’t able to articulate. Face in his chest with her needy fingers tight on his jacket. She played her demure self again. Billy felt her legs tremor, nudged them further apart with his boot.

   “All for me? I wouldn’t call it a loss. You gotta hold yourself up a bit longer, open that mouth again.” He gave her two slick fingers to suck so he could kiss down her tits some more. Plucked and nipped at every sensitive part of her body. “Fucking god damn it, I might give religion a shot after this.”

   “Yeah?” Evie licked the pads as Billy slunk down to marvel. Thought about taking her skirt off, but he decided he liked the way the straps framed her breasts partially spilling out of the bra.

   One hand forced her thigh up until her foot hit the bench. Evie was curved back into the wall, holding the side frame and gripping Billy’s shoulder.

   “Long as I get to go where you’re going, I don’t give a shit about anything else.” A chuckle warmed her leg as he pushed her skirt up out of the way.

   “That sounded oddly sentimental.”

   “Maybe I’ll bring you down to my level instead. Sinner.” Billy’s mouth placed one open kiss against her wet panties. Tongue following the hard swell of her bud. She decided she’d let him there in darkness. Every muscle in Evie’s body jumped at full attention. His divine and equally wicked mouth hummed blissfully. She craned to dig teeth into her own arm. Fists clenching.

   Billy maneuvered her leg over to get the ruined fabric down. Tucked them into his coat pocket and she figured she wouldn’t be seeing them again. Kneeling, Billy scooted closer and pushed her thigh back up, baring her to his mouth. 

   A cry hitched, snuffing out immediately as he tasted her. Filthy, open mouth kisses until her fingers tangled into his hair. Pulled. Billy moaned into her folds. Squeezed her thighs and loved the feel of them. God, he really couldn’t get enough of this girl. Every whine she let him have. Every nerve that wanted him. Needed him to ease the frays and sizzling. He just couldn’t get enough and was fine with following her into the dark.

   “Don’t stop.” Evie whispered. Hair falling into her face while her breasts rose and fell. She licked her lips and savored him.

   The dirty sounds he made against her that barely carried outside the booth. Billy squeezed her breast once he was certain she could stay up so she covered his hand. Craned to suck fingers. A gasp left. Evie’s hips rolled into his mouth. Asking for even more until two fingers pushed inside. 

   Billy moaned when her walls clamped. Pumped through the resistance to massage her nice and deep. Evie was quivering there. Using both arms on the sides to stay up. Shameless working into him now. Billy made a vaguely amused sound and gave an obscene pop around her clit, leaning out with arousal slicking his pink lips. It was music, the sounds her body let flow into crisp air.

   “Damn, no wonder you don’t go here anymore. Fucking yourself so hard and pretty on my fingers like this. You couldn’t make the nice list if you paid.” Being eye level with the sight had his cock twitching almost painfully. Evie’s head was tossed back. Clearly getting herself closer so Billy pulled away. Silenced her whine with a kiss. Let her suck and nip at his bottom lip. “See how fucking good you taste?”

   Evie’s hands were opening his belt. Quick and eager. Billy hitched as one palm slipped in, fingers ghosting trimmed blond hair to ease him out of the denim.

   “Confess, Evie, how bad you want me to fuck you right here.” He spoke as if he still had the upper hand.

   “Bet you I can do it without words.” Evie had his hips, guiding Billy to switch so he could sit. The question died and buried itself the second she sank down to lick precum pooling at his tip. Billy’s hips thrust up, eyes heavy and hooded.

   “That bad?” He shuddered, legs opening so she could lean into him. Evie unbuttoned the rest of his shirt to kiss the steel muscles. Twitching and molten. Nails scraped his skin. Stopped to stroke him idly. Kissing his abdomen, thighs, and tip. Evie traced the lines of vein and muscle. Down his shaft and back up his chest. So many sharp angles to explore.

   Little butterfly kisses while she leaned in until his cock slipped snug between her breasts. Spit slick and beading clear arousal. Billy moaned at the sight and gave a rut as she noticed and started to come out. 

   Hands latched to her shoulders. Billy hummed and rolled her nipple. Felt the weight of her tits and pushed them to squeeze his shaft. Idle fingers stilled to tuck her hair back in a way that was almost tender.

   “You’re pretty like this,” he said thoughtfully, “you’re pretty every which way.” Teeth tugged at her bottom lip. A shy kiss followed. Sometimes, he got so bold, she sank. Learned to savor it. Billy whispered against her. “Have I ever told you my cock looks great between your tits like that?” Frankly, he’d be happy to get off rubbing between her breasts or thighs alone. Fingers digging into supple skin. Evie had become a drug to him. Vanilla and amber immersed him in a high.

   “The occasion hasn’t really crossed.”

   “I’ll have to fix that next time I can lie you down.” Billy let her stroke him again and come up. Hesitating so he had to encourage her. “Get in my lap.” He was already pulling her into him. Smoothing hair back sweetly for lingering kisses.

   She long stopped worrying about feeling too heavy for him. Billy threw her around a mattress like it was nothing. Spread her legs, bent them up how he liked. Marveled at her flexibility. Kissed her obscenely and told her how pretty and blushed she looked. She liked when he was ample with her body. The boy certainly lifted enough weights, a fuller girl with hips was nothing to that. Jeans shifted lower as she straddled him. A kiss before she sank down.

   Billy moaned. A low honeyed sound into her ear. Almost musical. Arms wrapped tighter. Evie thanked God for birth control and moved at his coaxing.

   “C’mon, fuck me. I want it.” Billy kissed her fiercely. Nipples. Collar. Throat. Jawline. Mouth. And each time, he felt that same thrill rush his bones. A palm smacked her ass, squeezed it. Got drunk off the pulsing and little whines she gave him as if they were gift wrapped. “Confession. I want pictures of you. Spread out with my cock in you every way you like. They won’t beat the real thing, but fuck, I can’t...stop with you. Don’t want to.”

   Billy looked vulnerable when he moaned so pretty.

   His knuckles traced the curve of her cheekbone. Evie bounced, gripped his shoulders to stay upright with her spine curving. Unable to respond to something so passionate. Billy had that mode on him, sometimes it came out in odd ways. Filthy words to match his obscene way of caressing and worship. His manner of making Evie feel bold and sexy. Cute. Pretty. Fierce. Desired. The fact that sometimes he’d lie still for once and seek out her fingers across his curls and her lips on his cheek.

   Evie Fenny was a drug and cure to him, all at once. She gave back. Made Billy feel full and light. Made him feel present. Like he could shed his fangs. Lie back and feel the sun on his skin.

   “Confession,” Evie said between quick kisses with her thumb tracing the edge of his jaw, “I want more of you too. After....”

   “After?” He scoffed. “Like tonight?”

   “Just… After.” She slowed to rock into him. Deep thrusts that made them both moan in sync. So close. “After what’s next for us. Life. High school. Whatever. I want you to be apart of my after.”

   He could blame the sex for short circuiting her brain, he’d given it to her pretty hard.

   “I don’t know what I’m saying.” She rubbed her eyes, laughed because it felt silly. Felt Billy swoop in to kiss her. Wordlessly validating it wasn’t silly at all. That was another thing they did, pumped life into hopeful hearts and dwindling thoughts of something more. Something that was waiting...after.

   “We’ll deal with the after.” Billy skimmed a hand between them. Stroked her until she gave a cry into the denim of his jacket. A beautiful note. Evie thought she heard the twinkling music from outside, joyful and airy. Realized that maybe it was just playing in her head. “Right now, I want you to come.” He pecked her parted lips. “Cum for me, Angel.”

  “Billy.” She found his mouth again. They shared a godly nectar in one kiss. He worked her hips into his as she climaxed. Lungs heaving with a great arch. Billy watched her tits bounce and found his own release quick. Let her slip into him as he fell back to the wall. Lungs tried to find some peace. That New Orleans accent laced her tone again. “God damn it, Billy.”

   “Still a church, Fenny.” He massaged her thighs. Eyes shifting while she breathed even and fixed her bra. Tucked her shirt back in.

  “I need a bathroom. This is about to be a mess.” She slipped off him, pulled her undershorts back on because he wasn’t giving her panties up. Thighs hummed, sore and blissful. Billy tucked himself away to fix his own clothing back. Evie poked her head out. “Coast is clear.”

  Without thinking, she laced her hand in his. Hurried him out to the bathroom to pee and wash up. Saw her patchy, red cheeks in the mirror and huffed. Patted cold water on them. Billy finished at the sink and lit a quick cigarette by the window. That chipper music lingered outside.

  “Your mom is going to be here awhile. I vote your place.”

  “Movie on the couch.” She flicked hair aside. Billy flashed a smile, nodding as he snuffed the smoke out.

  “To start, maybe.” Two fingers grasped her chin, angled Evie’s mouth for a slow kiss. Tasted sweet, obscene, and smoky all at once. Made her dizzy.

  “I’d come back here under certain conditions.” He passed to go out with Evie behind him. She found her purse and coat again.

   “Let’s go, you had your fun.” She chuckled as they rejoined the event outside. Wind and all.

  “Uh, I think you did too.” Billy’s arm hung around her shoulder. Easy with their height difference.

  “You two leaving?” Mona had called, edging from her conversation to cross once the teens were outside. Evie pressed her legs together. Smiled. The Pastor who’d been speaking to her mother followed too. Plastic grin upon his face.

  “Ah, yeah, I’ll see you later, mom.” Evie had replied.

  “Thanks for coming to help.” Mona beamed. “Pastor Ray, you know Billy. Our neighbor. He was kind enough to help out.”

  “Mr. Hargrove. I’m surprised to see you here.” They shook tense hands.

  “Only thing I like more than Jesus is Christ. Who doesn’t want to turn water into wine.” Billy’s sarcasm was almost charming. He got a flat look in return.

  “I see...”

  “Evie, can you take some of the food home, honey? We’ll feed the neighbors.” Mona grasped Evie’s arm to pull her forth. “Just put it in the fridge. I’ll organize later.”

  “Sure.” Evie started to follow.

  “Be sure to grab the cherry pie if there’s any left. The ladies outdid themselves this year. Billy, you’re free to take some food home, son.” The Pastor addressed him kindly again. Billy’s grin flashed shiny teeth.

  “I love a good cherry pie, but I filled up on angel cake.”

  He caught Evie’s head whipping toward him as she went. Eyes ablaze which made his smile bigger.

  “Oh?” Ray’s head cocked. “I didn’t see that over there. Must have went fast.”

  “Like you wouldn’t believe, sir.” Billy patted the man’s shoulder and sauntered by. “Nice church, by the way. Pointy.” Evie hurried to his car with her arms full of Tupperware and boxes. Settled them in the backseat.

  “You’re so dead.” She looked sweet, waving at her mother across the lot. Billy laughed, starting his car. “I pick the music.” Her hand swatted his and a groan followed as she tuned the radio to some Etta James. Billy revved out of the parking lot, turning some heads as he went.

  “Admit it, you wouldn’t change what you did today. Sinner.” Billy’s free hand found her leg out of his usual habit. “Made my first church going experience special.”

  “Don’t turn on the waterworks just yet.” She teased back, sucking her cheeks in without looking at him. “Still mad at you.” A smile pulled her forcibly grumpy expression. Billy came to a stoplight. Tugged at a curl to let it bounce so she peered at him. Nose crinkling when she broke to chuckle.

  “Admit it.” Billy gave her thigh a squeeze, vibrant eyes flickering.

  “Make me.” Evie said, facing the road. “Later.” Lips lifted before the light turned green. His Camaro lurched forward.

  “Happy to.” Billy caught the song change. “Hey.”

  “Hm?”

  “It’s that song you’re always singing to yourself.” Billy turned it up. Irma Thomas. “The mushy one.” Her favorite. He played like it was a careless thing, but Evie stared at him. Warming. Reeled in too easily.

   Anyone…

   Anyone…

  “Shocked you paid attention to that.” She offered after a beat.

  “I have to hear it every day I see you, Evie.” Billy snorted, ocean eyes intent on the road. Evie knew better. “Not like I have a choice. Singing and plucking that guitar constantly.” He peered at the trees. “That stuff you were rambling about during the sex high about after.”

   “Sex high.” She scoffed.

   “Was that the fucking making a mess of you?” Billy asked slower. “Used to hate me.”

   “I didn’t hate you,” Evie paused when he shot her an unconvinced look, “we weren’t agreeable.”

   “Agreeable? Okay, now you sound like that prissy Austen chick you like to read.” Billy’s retort made her giggle. These little details he picked up about her that stuck with him. It was true, their relationship used to be in the negative for good reason.

   “I like when we hang out.” Evie shrugged. “Labels. Whatever. I just meant, we should...keep hanging out.”

   “After?”

   “After.” Evie produced simply. Billy twitched amusement at her, turned a corner.

   “Well,” he parked, “I don’t know, good. I guess”

   “Fine.”

   “Great.” Billy cut back in, challenged.

   “Wonderful.”

   “Fan-fucking-tastic.”

   Evie grasped his jacket, shut him up with a kiss. Made the boy breathless there. Billy’s blue eyes glimmered at her. Calm seas for miles. The sun shined into his car. Made the teens glow.

   “Movie?” She unbuckled to get out with him following. “Gotta get this food into my fridge.”

   “Only if I pick.” Billy stood there and let her set boxes into his arms before she grabbed the rest so they could walk up the driveway.

   “Sure. Our tastes align.” Evie peeked back at him with doe brown eyes. “I trust you.” She’d offered that too casually, Billy stilled at the door to watch her unlock it. Blinked.

   That was the thing about them, how nonchalant their hearts beat together. A totally on purpose accident. Billy remembering Evie’s quirks and her reluctance to show certain petals sprouting from her stem for fear the world might not like the colors. Budding to flash them with some fire and vibrancy because she had a boy who encouraged them despite it all. And she teased this incandescent quality back out of him with ease. Made him work to be still and feel the world turn once in a blue moon. Billy gave this little smile to himself without her noticing and followed Evie into the house.

   They hadn’t trusted each other before. And now it was approaching the after. Whatever that meant. Evie glowed to beam at him there and few things were mattering today. New beginnings.

   Billy let himself hope that the after would last.

[chasing-dreamers]

Close encounters

This is my entry for Patricia’s Halloween Challenge!

#12: “I paid $50.00 for this haunted house. I better die.”

#53: “There will be a lot of screaming tonight.”

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Reader

Word Count: 5.6k 

Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to Billy Hargrove or Stranger Things. This is completely fiction and made up.

A/N: I totally finished this within the first couple weeks and have been waiting to post this, just so I wouldn’t post it too early! Then I started working again and completely forgot about it. This is also the first time I have done anything like this and shared it this publicly.

-

Halloween. It’s literally the BEST day in the entire year. Candy. Costumes. Scary movies. Parties. Oh, and a possible Demogorgon every now and again. You know, usual Hawkins Halloween celebrations.

Thankfully we hadn’t seen any Demogorgons in almost a week and everyone in the lab were getting closer to closing the gate. They we reminded us frequently to stay cautious, but we weren’t going to let the worry of it get in the way of having a good night.

“Okay. So, these shorts or these ones?” I held up two pairs of short jeans in front of myself.

“Hmmm...” Robin tilted her head and squinted her eyes. “I like the red ones, but you have to wear your AC/DC shirt with them.”

“Are you sure?” I grabbed the shirt out of my closet, went into my bathroom, and changed quickly. I went back into my room and stood in front of the mirror. “SO, like this?”

“Tuck your shirt in and please, for just once, keep your hair down.” Robin sighed.

“Do I have to?” I whined. My hair was a curly mess all the time and I hated it.

“Yes!” Robin said. “Who knows, maybe your knight in shining armor will show up?”

“What is up with you and Nancy always teasing me about him!” I glared at her. I turned back into the mirror and tried to get my hair to fall where I wanted it to, but there was no point.

“Because you're actually obsessed with him,” Robin teased. “and I didn't even have to say his name.”

“Oh, shut up.”

“Billy Hargrove.” Robin shook her head. “I don’t know what you see in him, Y/N.”

“I don’t know either.” Billy was literally everything I wanted. Well, mostly. The guy was probably the biggest asshole I had ever met, but he was so god damn gorgeous. “It’s just a crush. It’s not like I have a chance with him or anything.”

“If he doesn’t realize that you are literally the coolest girl in Hawkins.” Robin stated. “Then he is actually the dumbass everyone says he is.”

“Yeah, I guess your right.” I chuckled.

“Hey guys! Hurry up!” Nancy walked into my room and grinned when she saw me. “Ooooo, look at you. Someone got all fancy for Billy.”

“Shut up, Nancy!” I groaned and we all giggled. I grabbed my backpack, made sure the walkie and other things I needed were in it, then followed the girls downstairs. Steve and Jonathan were sitting in the living room with my parents. “Are we all ready to go?”

“Yes!” Steve exclaimed and threw his arms up dramatically. “We were just waiting on the princess!”

“I am not a princess.” I rolled my eyes. “I just couldn’t figure out what to wear.”

“Well, you just proved his point.” Jonathan laughed.

“Watch it Byers.” I shot him a look and chuckled. “Do we have everything we need?”

“Yupp. Here’s your bat.” Steve tossed me the nail covered bat and I threw it over my shoulder

“Alright. Let’s get this show on the road.”

“Hold on!” My mom grabbed her camera off the table.

“Mom!’ I whined.

“No, Y/N. You know the rules!” My dad scolded me.

“Alright. Fine!” I sighed. I grabbed the others and made them stand next to me.

“1, 2, 3, cheese!”

 -

Click. Click. Click.

“Mom! You have taken like a million pictures!” I groaned as my mom stood there snapping away with her camera.

“Okay! Okay! Okay!” My mom chuckled and began to shoo us out the door. “Go have fun! And no boys, Missy! And why do you have to take that ugly bat everywhere?”

“Bears, mom. Duh!” Steve opened the door and we started walking out.

Right before I left the house, my mom walked over to me and started messing with my hair. “We have to have something done about this hair of yours.”

“Mom come on. Stop!” I shook my hair away from her and huffed. “Robin already tried.”

“Stay safe, Y/N.” My mom started lecturing again. “And I’m serious, no running into the woods with any boys.”

“I’ll keep an eye on her, Mrs. Y/L/N!” Nancy waved behind us, as we quickly tried to walk out the door.

“Thank you, dear!” My mom stood on the porch and waved as we headed down the driveway.

We all piled into Jonathan’s car since it could seat all of us, pulled out of my driveway, and headed to the forest. The haunted trail was a new thing the mayor decided we had to do. Pretty sure it was just his way of getting more money in his pocket. I mean, why else would a haunted trail cost $50.00.

-

We got to the field where the beginning of the trail was set up. A few feet away were a few food stands and small carnival games. The boys had just arrived on their bikes and were wearing their signature Ghostbuster outfits. Jonathan parked the car and they put their bikes right next to it. We all started laughing as we could hear them singing the Ghostbuster’s theme song.

“Who you gonna call?”

“THE NERDS!” I laughed as I jumped out the back and the boys all shot me dirty looks.

“Really, Y/N? Really?” Dustin scolded.

“Oh. Come on. You guys are such nerds.” I chuckled. El and Max giggled as other boys rolled their eyes at me. We all grouped together at the front entrance of the forest.

We all got our walkies out and made sure we were all on the same channel. “Y/N and Nancy, you have the front entrance. We cut up the trail into different sections on what it is going on in that area. All of you have map and a list of where we will be inside. Everyone will stay inside the trail with everyone else. If ANYTHING happens, use your walkie, and if you have to run; Hopper said we can go straight to his cabin and hide out there.” Dustin directed.

“Got it, Dad!” Steve shouted as he ran into the forest first with Jonathan right behind him. The party went in after them. Then El, Max, and Robin went it. I sighed.

“This is lame.” I huffed and leaned against the tree next to me. “We have to just sit here all night, take tickets, and listen to people complaining because it’s $50.00 to walk through a forest.”

“Would you rather be in there with them?” Nancy shrugged.

“There is NO WAY I am going into that forest.” I shook my head. “Not even if you paid me.”

“But what if Mr. ‘He’s-So-Hot-I-Could-Die’ showed up?” Nancy smirked.

“I should have never told you too that.” I laughed. “Plus, he will be with them and they are the last people on the planet I would want anything to do with. I definitely wouldn’t go into a god damn forest with them.”

“You never know.” She grinned. Oh, I knew. No way. As much as I was obsessed with him, I never had a chance. Even though I would go with him, I’d die before I went with anyone else he hung out with.

“I just don’t have a chance.” I shook my head in defeat. “It’s 5 til 8. People should start lining up here soon.”

“He will show up.” Nancy said, putting in her last thought about it. “Just you wait.”

-

It had been about an hour after the haunted trail opened, and ticket sales were higher than I expected. Even though everyone complained when we first heard about it, it was the only thing for anyone over the age of 13 to do. Except getting shit faced and partying, which is what I thought everyone would have been doing.

“I SO told you so.” I was taking someone’s ticket as I felt Nancy’s fist connect with my arm.

“Those are actually the last people I want to see tonight.” I huffed. Tommy H, Carol, and Nicole. Literally the worst trio ever. Then I realized Nancy was right. Billy did show up. I stood there in awe as he shuffled his feet around. He was mindlessly crewing his nails and you could see the muscles in his jaw tighten. His hair was falling into his face perfectly and his eyes sparkled in the light. My heart leaped into my throat as I noticed his chest and torso were completely bare under his jacket. His was made by the gods and I could stare at him forever. I looked back up to his face and those blue eyes were staring right back at me. “Shit!”

“Were you staring hard enough, Y/N!” Nancy half shouted; half whispered at me.

“I’m sorry! Look at him!” I groaned. I went back to taking tickets for the kids that were standing in front of me. I looked back over to where they were standing. Tommy and Carol seemed very eager to get into the woods. Nicole was too busy trying to get to Billy’s attention, but he showed no interest in her.

“Billy is TOTALLY staring at you!” Nancy nodded and jabbed me in my side.

I shoved her back and hissed at her. “Nancy, shut up. He’s not even here to see me.”

“How can you be so sure about that, princess?” Excuse me? What is happening! Why is he standing right here!

“Because you came here with me, Billy. Come on.” Nicole explained as she stomped over to him and tried to wrap her arm around him.

Billy rolled his eyes and tightened his jaw. “No, Nicole. No, I didn’t. Now get in there before you have to go by yourself.”

Nicole shoved the ticket into my hand, then went back to where Tommy and Carol were.

Nancy winked at me and giggled as I shot her a dirty look. I turned back towards Billy and he was standing even closer to me.

“So, what do you say, Y/N? Care to join me?” Billy purred.

“Nah., I think I’ll pass.” I shrugged.

“Why not? It could be like a date.” He smiled even more, and I could hear Nancy squeal as she continued to keep the line moving.

“Date? Billy Hargrove, do you even know me?” I laughed.

“Yes, Y/N. I do.” There is no way he did. “You just decide to run off every time I get close to you.”

“Well, then this is me running off again.” I threw the tickets into the trash can next to me, grabbed my backpack, and then grabbed my bat. “I am going to go get some food, Nance. I’ll be right back.”

“Okay, fine. It’s not a date, but I still want you to come with me.” Billy insisted and grabbed my arm to keep me from walking away.

“Why Billy?” I pulled my arm out of his grip.

“Come on, princess! Live a little!” Billy shouted. “Nancy can handle this by herself.”

“Definitely.” Nancy grinned. She nodded toward my bat. “You were going to leave me anyway!”

“I do live, a little! That’s why I am just selling tickets!” I pointed him in his broad, bare chest. “Billy, your dates end up in a car or a bed or just where the hell ever, and usually with someone screaming. So, thanks but no thanks.”

“Oh, there will be a lot of screaming tonight.” Nancy chuckled.

“Nancy!” I yelled.

“Y/N, you are literally the biggest baby I know when it comes to this stuff.” She quickly shot back. “You’ll scream before anything even jumps out at you.”

“Well, then you definitely need me to go with you.” Billy laughed.

“Go on, Y/N. Have some fun for once.” Nancy took his ticket and tried to get me to walk into the trail.

“Nancy, you literally told my mom this was the last thing that would happen.” I didn’t budge.

“What’s the worst thing that could happen, princess?” Billy asked.

“Actually everything.” I huffed.

Nancy looked at me and rolled her eyes, then started pushing me into the woods. “Gotta keep the line going.”

“You are a traitor, Nancy Wheeler. A traitor!” I yelled. I tried to go back out, but Billy slinked an arm around my waist and walked into the trail.

“Is this trail even worth $50.00?” Billy asked as we finally started walking deeper into the forest.

“Honestly, I wouldn’t know.” I replied. “I have never been in here. Obviously.”

“Well, I paid $50.00 for this haunted house, so I better die.” Billy stated.

“If you died, it would definitely make it worth $50.00” I shrugged. “This is literal kidnapping and it’s just a trail, dumbass.”

“Ouch.” Billy gasped, putting is hand up to his chest. The first part was just a long tunnel made from cardboard boxes and with fake candles hanging from the top. We walked through it silently, but I couldn’t understand what I was doing.

“Billy, why am I in here?” I asked him.

“Because you can’t resist me.” He chuckled.

“But I said no.” I said. “I mean, why me and not Nicole? Actually, why me at all?”

“I think you’re cool and I have been trying to figure out how to get you to hang out with me for months.” He nervously rubbed his hands on his jeans.

“Who are you and what have to done to the Billy Hargrove I go to school what?” There was no way he had been trying to hang out with me. Absolutely no way.

“Very funny, princess.” Billy chuckled. He moved his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to where his lips were touching my ear. “And yes, I do.”

“I just can’t-AAAH!!” As we turned a corner, someone dressed up as a clown jumped down from the trees and yelled right in my face. I instantly swung the bat up, barely stopping myself from swinging.

Billy burst out in laughter. “Looks like Nancy was right.”

“Oh, shut up.” I growled.

Before I could answer him, something jumped out from behind us and I shrieked. I whipped around to another person dressed as a clown skipping back behind the wall and laughing manically. Then suddenly two arms were wrapped around me. I pulled away and, again, instinctively swung the bat above my head.

“Y/N! Holy hell!” Billy reached up and ripped the bat from my hands. “It was just me!”

“Fuck!” I stumbled back and put my hands over my mouth. Billy looked at how freaked out I was and let out a sigh. He grabbed the bat from me and took my hand with his free one.

“Is there a reason you get scared so easily?” He squeezed my hand reassuringly as I just shook my head.

“I’ve seen some shit, Billy.” I shuddered. “It would scare you too.”

“I can tell. From how jumpy you are, to how fast you react with this bat of yours.” He swung the bat down next to his leg. “But don't worry, princess. You have me now.”

“Well, that’s comforting.” If only he knew.

“So, what happened?” He asked. “What is there in Hawkins that could have you so freaked out all the time?”

“Okay. There are big, scary monsters, called Demogorgons coming into Hawkins from another dimension called The Upside Down. The Hawkins Lab is responsible for keeping the door open. Then your sister’s best friend has crazy powers that lets her control stuff with her mind. Oh, and there might be Russians somewhere too.” I explained as we walked through the third part of the trail.

“I know I’m an ass.” Billy growled. “But you don’t have to bullshit with me.”

“I’m not.” I shrugged. We turned a makeshift corner and I realized there was blood in pools on the ground. “Billy. Don’t move.”

“Why? Is some big, scary, whatever monster going to hurt me?” He grumbled and rolled him eyes.

“Billy. Shut up.”

“Come on, princess!” He sighed and pulled at my arm.

“Billy!” I grabbed his arm and pulled back as hard as I could. He stumbled back toward me and gave me a bewildered look. I slammed my hand over his mouth and ripped the bat out of his hand. “I said ‘Shut up.’”

He grumbled but nodded. “Now stay behind me and do exactly as I say.” He nodded again and turned back toward the blood on the ground. I slowly turned to look around the corner and felt my blood go cold. There was a Demogorgon dragging a deer through the trail. I grabbed my walkie from my backpack, ducking behind a tree and dragging Billy with me. He just stood there with a questioning look. Shit.

“Code Red. Repeat. I have a Code Red. Section 3. Code Red. This is a Code freaking Red.” I quickly said.

“Copy. On our way.” Nancy responded.

“Copy. We are in section 5. Give us two minutes.” Lucas also replied.

Billy sat there and tried to get me to walk back towards it. “It’s just part of the trail, princess. What kind of trick is this?”

“This isn’t a trick, Billy. Stay quiet.” I snapped.

“Stop messing with me, Y/N.” He growled.

“I’m not, Billy.”

“Then let’s go.” He pulled me and, in the process, stomped down on a tree branch and it snapped.

I froze. Billy pulled on my arm again. I ripped it out of his grip and whipped around. The Demogorgon had now turned around and was walking towards us.

“Seriously, Y/N? I’m not falling for this.” Billy yelled. The Demogorgon opened his face and screeched towards us. “What the- “

“Billy. Run.” I shoved Billy right as the Demogorgon started running towards us. We ran back towards where we had just come from, but we had to get off the trail. I couldn’t let this thing get to where everyone was. I pushed through a pumpkin set up and got away from the trail. I would NOT let this thing find anyone else. Billy stayed close beside me as we continued running through the forest. My first thought was to stay several feet outside the trail so the others could still find us...somehow. I just hope they could find us before we get killed. I tried to run towards the cabin, but I had lost track of where we were is the midst of my panicking.

“Umpf.” Billy tripped and smashed his face down onto a tree root. I dropped the bat and tried to pull him up, but the Demogorgon was already standing less than fifteen feet away from us.

“Y/N, What the hell is that?!” Billy screamed.

“A Demogorgon. I told you to shut up! Maybe if you had listened; he would be dead already!” I yelled back at him.

The Demogorgon opened his opened his face again and screeched at Billy. Billy scuffled back as far as he could, until his back was up against a tree, and I stood in front of him. “Y/N, what are you doing!”

“Shut up, Billy! Shut the HELL UP!” I tightened the grip I had on my bat and started swinging it down in front of my feet. For some reason, I wanted to keep this thing distracted. “Billy. Get out of here.”

“Y/N, there is no fucking way I am leaving you with this thing.” He sounded completely terrified and I couldn’t blame him. I was fucking terrified.

“Billy, please.” The Demogorgon let out a long growl and was slowly getting closer.

“Come on, big guy. You know you want this.” I tried to remain calm as I began to shake violently.

As I taunted him, he leaped forward and I swung the bat as hard as I could. It made a loud squelching noise as it connected with the side of the Demogorgons head. The monster jumped back and crouched down. He shook his head, flinging blood everywhere. He tried to attack again, getting hit with the bat a second time.

We went back and forth for several minutes. He would swing, I would dodge it, then connect the bat to some part of his body. I kept my distance and tried to make sure I stayed between him and Billy. After another hit, the Demogorgon made it to where I could hear Billy breathing right behind me. I turned and at look at him. His face was covered in blood. He stared at the monster without even blinking. He looked at me and I could see tears starting to collect in his eyes.

Suddenly, everything went white. I had let my guard down. I now I could feel a sharp, agonizing pain it my side. I screamed and felt the Demogorgon’s claws catch my body and I fell into the dirt.

I sat there and watch the Demogorgon stand up and get ready to attack again. I ducked my head and felt the bat get ripped from my hand. Billy swung it over his head and smash it down onto the Demogorgon’s head. The monster backed up and screeched in pain, but Billy didn’t stop. He yelled as he continued swinging without giving him anytime to swing at him.

“GO. TO. HELL!” Billy spun the bat in his hand, swung it up, and caught the Demogorgon on the side of the head.

“Billy!” I tried to stand up but fell back down quickly. Small, black spots began to fill my vision and I felt my body wobbling around. “Billy!”

Right as Billy swung the bat at monster again, I heard someone else screaming and the Demogorgon was lifted into the air. Eleven stepped out past the trees, her hands stretched out in front of her, and blood pouring out from her nose. The Demogorgon screeched as he was thrown through the trees and make of cracking sound as him body connected with a tree.

“Billy!” Max was right behind Eleven and I could faintly see a few more shadows walking towards us. I tried to say anything, but I felt my body give away and my eyes get heavy. The smell of blood filled my nose.

“Y/N! Oh my god!” I heard Nancy yelling and I felt my body being picked up.

Then everything went black.

A few moments later, I felt my head bobbing and my body moving slightly. There was a sharp pain in my side that was more intense than anything I have ever felt. I could hear distorted talking and slowly tried to open my yes.

“Hey. Hey. Hey. Careful, princess.”

“Billy?” I blinked a few times and looked up to see Billy's face right above me. I turned my head and could see the trees flying past us as the car sped down the road.

“Billy. You seriously can never tell anyone what happened.” Nancy was rambling and freaking out.

“Nancy, seriously? I don't even want to try and figure out what the fuck happened back there.” Billy snapped at her. “Y/N is injured and all that matters to me is getting her to the damn hospital.”

“Why do you even care what happens to her, Hargrove?” Steve yelled at Billy.

“That’s none of your damn business, Harrington.” Billy snapped. As their voices continued to get louder, so did the pounding in my head. I groaned and tried to cover my ears. “Hey. Hey. Hey. Careful, Y/N. Careful. We’re almost there.”

-

“Beep. Beep. Beep.”

I woke up to a mild pain in my head and a numbing feeling in my torso. I felt extremely groggy. I groaned as I opened my eyes and a bright light flooded into my vision. “W-Where am I?”

“Woah. Woah. Woah. Be careful.” Someone said softly.

I tried to focus my eyes on who was talking, but everything was still too fuzzy. I brought my hand up to cover my eyes, hoping any part of my headache would go away. “What happened?”

“Honey, you got attacked by a bear.” Another voice said. “He messed you up pretty badly. Thankfully, your boyfriend here and your friends got you to us fast enough.”

“What?” My eyes focused and I looked at the nurse standing by my bed.

“Do you need anything, Hun?” She asked.

“J-Just water. Please.” Boyfriend? The nurse left and I turned to see who else was in the room.

“Hey there, princess.” His eyes were flooded with concern and he held my hand firmly. “How do you feel?”

“Hi, Billy.” I leaned my head into his hand that was holding my face. He was definitely a sight for sore eyes after what happened. I looked down and realized he had changed out of what he was wearing before. Instead he just had a light blue button up shirt on and had tucked in into a cleaner pair of jeans. “I just feel like I got run over by a truck.”

“Well,” he raised his eyebrows and chuckled. “considering what I saw, that doesn’t seem like it hurts too bad.”

“Here is your water, dear.” The nurse came back in and she had Billy help her sit me up more. I yelped out in pain when I tried to push up with my hands. “Careful, Hun. Here you go.”

“Thank you.” I said weakly. I took a few sips out of the straw and sighed. The cold water felt relieving going down my throat.

“Now that you are awake, my name is Anna. I will be the main nurse taking care of you while you are here.” She gave me a warm smile.

“Thank you, Anna.” I drank more water and Billy helped me hold the cup without spilling it. “Are my parents here?”

“Yes, dear. They were here as soon as they got called. Hopper had to have them go down to the station, but they should be back here very soon,” Anna explained. She asked if I needed anything else and I shook my head. She left the room and said she would let my parents know I woke up.

“I finally know where you get your little spark from.” Billy chuckled. “Your mom almost killed me when she saw all the blood all over me. Then yelled at me from almost twenty minutes about taking you into the woods.” “Oh my gosh. I’m so sorry.” I groaned.

“I don’t blame her. Her daughter leaves with her friends and then ends up in the hospital because Billy Hargrove took her into the woods.” He shrugged. The door to the room opened and I smiled as my parents came in.

“Y/N, oh honey, you’re okay.” My mom rushed over as soon as she saw me and hugged me. She pulled back, keeping her hands around my face, making my look at her. “Are you okay? Do you need anything? Have they been taking care of you?”

“Yes, Mom. I’ve only been awake for a few minutes. I’m fine.” She pulled her hands away, only to give my dad some room to hug me. “Hey, Dad.”

“Hey, kiddo. I’m glad you’re doing okay.” He said. He tried to sound firm, but I could hear him holding a choke back, trying to keep himself from crying.

“Me too.” I relaxed a little more. Having my parents here made me feel more comfortable.

“We came as soon as we got the call from Hopper.” My parents pulled up a chair and my mom started explaining what happened after they had gotten me to the hospital. “All of your friends were here, and Joyce and Hopper were here too. We all waited until after you went in to get your stitches done before going down to the station. The other kids tried to stay here, but their parents wanted them home where they knew where they were.”

“Billy here, he is the only one that hasn’t left yet.” My dad nodded toward Billy. He was nervously twirling his ring on his finger and I reached up to grab his hand. He took a deep breath and looked back up at us.

“But I do remember telling you not to go into the woods and especially not with any boys.” My mom scolded both of us. “You’re lucky he was there with you and was able to get you out of there.”

“I know, Mom.” I sighed. “I’m sorry.”

“We are just glad you are safe, kiddo.” My dad said.

“We will go get you some food and be right back, sweetheart.” My mom stood up and kissed my forehead.

“I love you too, mom.” They walked out and I turned back toward Billy. “You never left?”

He shook his head. “Hopper almost killed me because I made him bring the paperwork to file the report to me. I couldn’t leave your side, Y/N. You saved my life and I almost lost you.”

“Billy, you saved me too.” I reached up and wiped the tear that rolled down his cheek. I giggled lightly. “But for future reference, I told you a haunted trail was a horrible idea for a first date.”

“Y/N, I’m so sorry.” Billy stammered. “I should have... I should have listened to you. Plus, you went in there because of me. This is my fault.”

“Billy,” I said taking ahold of his hand. “there is no way you knew what was going to happen. You didn’t even know it was there. How could you?”

“I could have lost you.” This was a side of Billy Hargrove that I had never seen. He looked so vulnerable. Over me of all people.

“Trust me,” I laughed. “you can’t get rid of me that fast.”

“I hope not, princess.”

­-

It was finally time to go home. It was a still early in the day, so only my parents were there with me. We had finally convinced Billy to go back to school after a couple days and we only agreed so he could get my schoolwork for me. It was weird without him here

“Well, Miss Y/N. It looks like the doctors are finally ready to let you go home.” My nurse happily stated. “As much as I enjoyed having you here and getting to take care of you, I am very glad to see you finally going home.”

“You have been the best nurse ever, Anna.” I gave her a quick hug and she handed me all my paperwork. “If I ever come back, I will definitely ask for you.”

“Y/N, if you end up back in the hospital,” my dad shook his head. “your mother will kill you.”

“Yes, she will.” My mother laughed and sighed.

I chuckled. After three and a half long weeks, the doctors we finally allowed to give me the ‘Okay.’ Mostly, because Dr. Owens heard about the attack, knew what it was, and they made me stay longer. Thankfully, there were no severe infections and the wounds healed up relatively quickly.

“A list of all the ointments and antibiotics you will need are in here. You will just need to take that paper to Kathy down the hall.”

“Thank you so much for taking care of her, Anna.” My mom had tears in her eyes as she thanked her.

“Just make sure she isn’t running into the woods with anymore boys.” Anna smirked. “She’s definitely not one to mess around with.”

They all laughed, and I headed to get my medicine. Once I got that, it was finally time to go home.

-

Five years later.

“Hey, princess.”

“Billy!” I laughed loudly as he picked me up and spun my around. I kissed he deeply. He wrapped his arms around me tightly and slowly put me back down on the ground. I pulled back and staring into his still, memorizing blue eyes. “I missed you.”

“I told you I would be back from California for Halloween. I can’t miss this one.” He kissed me again, then took my hand as we headed toward the ticket booth.

“You would never hear the end of it.” I grinned. We walked to the back of the line and waited to get our tickets. “I’m kinda nervous. I’m surprised they decided to do this again.”

“Well, there haven’t been anymore ‘bear attacks,’ so I guess the mayor decided it was worth a shot again.” Billy shrugged. “It’s been made a lot shorter and Hopper said the police are even working it this year. Like, fully overseeing the whole thing.”

“That’s good to know.” I crossed my arms and could still feel the deep scars running across my side. Five years. That’s how long it took them to do another haunted trail. That’s how long it took me to even want to go back into the woods. That’s how long Billy and I had been together now. Five years.

“You okay, princess?” Billy’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts, and I realized he had gotten the tickets already. “Are you sure you’ll be ready?”

“Yes. I even made sure I brought this.” I laughed and shook my backpack. The handle of the nail covered bat stuck out the top. There was no way I wasn’t taking that thing with me.

“Of course, you did.” Billy slung his arm over my shoulders and kissed my head. “Let’s go, princess.”

We joined the line headed into the trail. There were two officers standing on both sides of the entrance, and then they had adults walking through with all the kids. The safety precautions were through the roof for this thing. I couldn’t blame them. We were lucky I was able to recover from the attack last time.

The officer took our tickets and we walked into the trail with a few other people that had been standing in front of us. Billy kept a tight grip on my hand, and I nodded whenever he looked at me with worry.

My skin crawled as we walked deeper into the trail. We were very lucky I was still alive. But there was something that nobody could have known.

We wouldn’t be so lucky this time.

[mindflayedr-blog]

You Make It Easy - Billy Hargrove // p.1

Setting: December of 1984

➳ You struggle to not fall for the boy next door, but what you don’t know is that he already fell for you.

Whew this is my first imagine after a while, I really hope this doesn’t suck yikes!! I really fell completely in love with Billy this season so i’ll prob make hella fics about him oop- // also this will be like a mini series I guess, I’ve already written the second part so I’ll be posting it sometime tomorrow, the rest is still a work in progress. I don’t know how many chapters there will be in total **there may be some mistakes, i proof read this several times but i might’ve missed some things**

Word count: 2k oops

Warnings: cursing, some mentions violence and abuse, and it’s kinda sad 

Your dad parked the moving truck in front of a new house in Hawkins, Indiana. You step out of the car and sniffed the cold Indiana air, taking in the new surroundings. The neighborhood was nice and family oriented, there were a couple of kids playing tag and some were drawing on the sidewalks. Light snow fell from the sky making the surroundings feel peaceful and calm. You looked around trying to familiarize yourself with your new neighborhood when a guy with curly dirty blond hair caught your eye. He was sitting on the porch steps of his own home which was situated next to yours. He was wearing a jean jacket with blue jeans. Underneath the jacket was a plain white shirt and a plain gold chain adorned his neck. You stared at him as he took a puff out of his cigarette. He looked ethereal, the sunlight hit him so perfectly that he looked like he was glowing. You didn’t realize how hard you were staring until he turned to look at you, making you jump and immediately turn your attention to the boxes that were needed to be put inside.

You focused your attention to the boxes in the truck, trying hard to forget how embarrassed you were. You pulled out a box that belonged to your new room, you slightly struggled at how heavy it was. 

“Need help with that?” An unfamiliar voice spoke behind you. Who the hell?

You turned around and saw him, the same guy you were just staring at. Your hands trembled and your arms began to give in and drop the box you are holding, but thankfully he was there to catch it. You could feel your cheeks burning up in embarrassment, but he didn’t comment on it.

“Um… I.. I got it… th-thanks.” You stuttered out a reply as you tried to take back the box. 

He laughed at your attempt at getting back the box and spoke, “Bullshit, you clearly almost dropped it. C’mon let me help you.”

“I don’t want to bother you, s-seriously. It’s… um… fine.” 

He shook his head no and started to head towards your front door with the box, “Where does this go to?” He asked, stopping at the entrance of your house. 

“Oh, how nice! You’ve already made a friend, Y/N! I knew you’d settle right in.” Your mom smiled at you while stepping out of the truck. “Mom please not now.” You thought to yourself. 

You took a deep breath and made your way towards the curly haired boy, ignoring your mom’s comment. “That belongs in my room, here I’ll show you,” You said as you led him upstairs and into a room towards the left of the stairs. “Just put it there, thanks.”

“No problem, I’m Billy by the way and I take it that your name is Y/N.” Billy said as he gently placed the box on the carpeted floor of your room. 

“Yup, that’s my name,” You stood there and gave him a small awkward smile, “Sorry for staring at you by the way. I do that a lot when I space out.” You said, giving Billy a bullshit excuse, hoping he’d believe it. 

“Right, like you weren’t captivated by my beauty.” He teased giving you a sly smile to which you rolled your eyes at. 

“Captivated? More like repulsed. Did you not see me scramble away?”

“Whatever you say Y/N, give it a month and you’ll fall in love with me.” Billy smirked at you jokingly, making you roll your eyes once more. You acted annoyed but those words were now imprinted onto your brain. Would it be really that easy to fall in love with him?

“With that attitude? Never. Anyway, there’s more boxes downstairs, less talking more helping.” You dismissed the topic at hand and herded him outside. Give it a month and you’ll fall in love with me. That sentence echoed in your head for the rest of the day.

That was how you met Billy Hargrove, the charming boy next door that you became fast friends with and the same charming boy who stole your heart, even though you refused to admit it. That same week that you moved in, he brought you to every place in Hawkins he knew. He took you to the record shop, to the nearby lake, to the hilltop that overlooked the town, to every little place he found beautiful. School was out until January so you two were able to hang out everyday and explore Hawkins. Hanging out everyday of course included endless conversations. You two talked about every little thing but you noticed that he never talked about his family or his family life. Billy avoided the topic of family like a plague. Whenever you would ask about his mom, his sister, or his dad he’d quickly change the topic, and you never once pressed him for an answer, until one night. 

It was around 9 p.m you heard screaming coming from the Hargrove residence. You couldn’t make out the words, but it was two voices. One was the ever so familiar voice of Billy Hargrove and the other was what you guessed was his dad. You bite your nails nervously, hoping that Billy was okay. You glued yourself close to your kitchen window trying to piece together what was happening next door.

“Worthless piece of shit!” Billy’s dad screamed loud and clear, it was the first coherent phrase you heard after listening in for about 20 minutes. The scream is then followed by what it sounded like a slap and then after that a few grunts of pain and more incoherent screaming followed by total silence. By then you were worried, maybe this is why Billy never mentioned his family. 

You rushed out to your front porch hoping you see your friend outside. As soon as you opened your front door, Billy was there as if he summoned by command. He staggered outside his house while rubbing his jaw, wincing through the pain. His lip was busted and a bruise was forming under his eye. As soon as he saw you standing by your front porch, he began to walk towards you. You were the only person he could think of to go to for comfort.

“Billy what happened? Are you okay?” You rushed towards him, engulfing him with a big hug. He leaned into your touch, finding peace and security in your embrace.

“Hey since you’re here can you help me clean this shit off?” He pointed at his bloody face, “I can’t have my face looking like this. It’s my best feature.” He gave you a small smile, wincing afterwards. Despite him being clearly hurt he still managed to smile at the sight of you and crack a joke. You didn’t smile however, instead you carefully caressed his soft face, trying not to break down at the sight of him. He didn’t deserve any of this. Not even an ounce.

You assisted him inside your house, you were glad your parents weren’t home because they’d definitely be asking one hundred and one questions right about now. You helped him walk to your dining room and there he sat on one of your dining chairs. You hurried to the bathroom for the first aid kit and a damp washcloth. You sat in front of him and softly rubbed away the dried blood by his mouth. You stared at his eyes and saw how tired and worn out he was, you figured this wasn’t the first time this has happened.

“Stop looking at me like that.” Billy said icily, snatching the washcloth away from you and doing the job himself.

“Like what? Give me that.” You retorted and snatched the cloth back, returning to what you were doing.

“Like you pity me, I don’t need pity.” 

“Billy that’s not what this is, I care about you. I’m just… I’m just worried. I’m worried about you. Does he do this to you a lot?” You asked him, you glanced at his blue eyes briefly before opening the first aid kit to retrieve some alcohol wipes. Billy blinked at you as if he couldn’t believe that you actually care, but eventually he speaks up. 

“He.. he does this… every other day, but I thought I could go a whole week without being his personal punching bag, guess I was wrong though. Turns out he doesn’t give a shit about how the new neighbors would think of him.” Billy answers, wincing as you gently cleaned up his wounded lip with an alcohol wipe. 

“Can I ask why he did it? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to of course.” You said as you finished cleaning up his face, it looked better than it was before, but of course the bruises remained. 

“No it’s fine, he got pissed because I forgot to pick up Max, my sister, at the arcade. She was supposed to be home an hour ago but I was with friends so I forgot.” 

“Why didn’t he just do it himself? He has a damn car doesn’t he? Did he forget that he is in fact a father?”

Billy chuckled at your response, the corners of his eyes crinkling. Despite the bruises and wounds, he still managed to look like an angel.

“Neil’s a lazy piece of shit, all he does is go to work for a few hours and come back home to either drink, sleep, or beat the shit out of me. He doesn’t give two shits about Max and I.” Billy took a deep breath and looked down, his eyes not meeting yours. He looked so vulnerable and so broken, all you wanted to do was hold him forever. “So because of that,” Billy continued, “I’m in charge of taking care of Max. It’s me and Susan actually, but mostly me. Apparently I’m the fucking father and mother now.” 

You tucked a loose curl behind Billy’s ear, trying to comfort him. You didn’t know what to say, what would you even say to someone who’s pouring their heart out to you? So all you did was listen. You sat there in silence listening urging him to continue, letting you know that you’re here for him.

“It’s just complete fucking bullshit, I hate living there. I want to get away from here some day, but right now I’m stuck in this shit hole town and I’ll just have to deal with it.” Billy finished with an angry huff. He lifted his head up and looked at you, you saw that there were tears forming in his eyes that were threatening to fall. Billy tried blinking them away but failed.

“Next time he does this to you, come over right away and don’t hesitate. I don’t care how late or how early it is, I want you to come here, so you can be safe.” You said softly so only he can hear.

The tears that Billy tried to blink away finally fell from his eyes and he sobbed. You could tell that all the pent up anger and sadness took over him. He reached for you and held you tight as if any second now you’d slip away. You held him tightly in return, reassuring him that you’re here. A few tears fell from your eyes but you wiped them away quickly, trying to be strong for Billy. 

“Hey it’s okay, it’s alright. I’m here okay? I’m here for you, always. All the time.” 

“Thank you Y/N,” Billy’s voice was muffled, his head was on the crook of your neck, “I’ve never told anyone this and now you’re here to listen to me and I just… thank you. Thank you for being here.” 

That was the first time you’ve ever felt something towards Billy other than friendship. It was new and scary since this is your best and only friend and feeling this way might ruin everything, but despite that you’ve decided to suppress the feeling and stayed close friends with him. Never uttering a word about how you felt towards him and labeling your relationship as strictly platonic. What you didn’t know, however, was that Billy felt the same way too, ever since the day you moved in next door.

-----

YIkesssss i really hope that didn’t suck, im honestly lowkey nervous about this fic. I’ll post part two soon :))