#oh i can't wait for you to pull the victim card on this one

[marcodiazisatransgirl]

First, Breastforce claimed that their entire interest in this started from Marco in a dress from St. O's. The person asking about Marco in a dress was trying to bait Adam into saying something about the theory.

Most people who repeat the theory do it because of the dress, not the "dysphoria" (which is actually body dysmorphic, involving obsessive focus on a perceived flaw in appearance.)

I know that you're not going to believe any of this. It's upsetting to see you misgender anything, especially when I've been misgendered so many times in the last 6 years. Also your comments about my physical state don't help, making a joke out of it is cruel which is how I interpreted it.

And being transphobic is another jump to conclusion that doesn't make either of us look.good. I'm not transphobic. I'm transgender and have had years of reflection on iit. Calling me transphobic is like a punch in the gut.

As far as Daron, all she said was that she always intended Marco to be the type of guy who wasn't hung up on doing some things that are typically feminine without any concerns for his masculinity. It seems from an experience she had when she was young with her best friend who was male. When I asked her if Marco was going to grow up and be a good male role model, she said yes. Twice she did.

I won't deny I love the character a lot. I won't deny that some of the crew liked that some people saw themselves in Marco. But even if you look at the storyboard that everyone points to, it was a doll of a persona Marco already distanced himself from except for a royalty payment of $650. It was a capitalist business deal and nothing more. That's all the merch was ever about. A way to give Marco spending money during adventures. It wasn't about some secret "he's going as a she" behind everyone's back. It was all about the money. If Marco really cared about it on the level you theorize, he wouldn't have taken money out of the profits and would have done it in the best interests of the girls.

In conclusion I see this is misgendering. While it is a fictional character, some of the ways you've interacted with me have also been along the same lines, about me being transphobic and making light of my physical problems which is hitting below the belt.

Hi. I've been nice to you thus far. I've argued with you on your level, I've met your points on good faith. I've countered every argument you've given me with relative politeness considering how you've harassed me and my community, or ignored you when i was tired of said harassment. But now?

Get fucked, mate.

Where the fuck do you get off with this? Where do you see the moral high ground attacking trans people - OTHER trans people! - for finding identity with a character in a cartoon, in a community on tumblr. How childish are you that you cannot fathom other people having different interpretations of the source material. How petty and small-mided and hateful can you possibly be that you see trans people finding joy and community in a fictional character on tumblr and decide that it's hateful. How puritanical is your mindset that you cannot stand the idea of other people existing outside of your point of view.

Jen has said that she's not angry at you but I fucking am. Grow the fuck up you petulant, whinging, tantrum-throwing child. Flinging baseless accusations - I've never talked about your physical state, I barely know what it is beyond you being physically disabled in some way, which I found out after the majority of my interactions with you. I'm sorry, but you do not get to use your own problems as justifications for bullying and attacking others. You do not get to play the victim when it is you going after people apropos of nothing. It is you sending hate to fan artists just minding their own business, it is you going into our tags to complain about how we enjoy and interpret media.

And no, I don't fucking stalk you so I didn't know you were trans. Congratu-fucking-lations asshole! Looks like trans people can be just as toxic as the cis! Thanks for taking one for the team! And I'm sowwy that it's huwwrtful but your harassment and condemnation of the theory fucking stinks of transphobia. If you just disliked the theory, that's fine - I know plenty of polite and nice and non-transphobic people who don't think it's correct - people like Adam McArthur who would be appalled at your harassment at people over different interpretations of his character. Dozens of other tumblr users dislike the theory and they don't fall into your emotionally manipulative bullshit. That's a you specific problem.

(and while we're on the cast/crew topic: Daron Nefcy would be appalled at your use of her words as a gotcha for your bullshit cyber bullying. they mean nothing other than her affirming your interpretation of the character)

Your preposition is fundamentally flawed, you base your entire judgement of this theory on the fact that the idea started when a trans woman related to a character in a way you didn't think was valid. Your idea that somehow feminine men are underrepresented in fiction is completely ridiculous. But to go the fuck off about how even being perceived as a trans woman is dangerous to cishet men and then land on the conclusion that the problem is trans women? That's fucking transphobic.

But fine. You're trans so you can't be transphobic. You must of course have a ready list for canonical trans women for us to have flocked to back in 2016 when the theory was popular! Actually, I managed to find four examples (off the top of my head) of major characters in children's cartoons, the genre we're talking about. So you must be able to find the same! No? What about that same list from today? C'mon! If feminine men are so underrepresented compared to trans women, there must be more of them today at least! Fine we'll make it easy - it doesn't have to be a children's cartoon! Show me any western cartoon from any point in history where there was a trans woman as a major character. She doesn't even have to be the main character! Just a part of the reoccurring cast.

Show. Me. One.

But somehow those poor cis men are the ones victimized by us mean trans people.

I'm so fucking sorry you feel personally victimized by (other) trans people seeking representation. I'm so fucking sorry you are so badly triggered by (other) trans people (many of whom have dysphoria) identifying dysphoria in a work of fiction. But--newsflash asshole!--you don't get to bring your problems into a public space and harass people about them. You are the one in the wrong here, but your head is too far up your own arse to even dream about treating other people like actual human beings.

So, yeah. You're an immature, transphobic, bullying piece of shit and I want you to stay the fuck away from me, my friends, and my fucking tags.

[mochinomnoms]

i understand the simping for the fashion dilf believe me i do

but i come offering other non simping thoughts for now

i can imagine yuu just casually braking into other dorms to sleep when it rains bc their dorm is still…extremely broken (because the BIRD MAN WONT FIX IT)

so their friends (and possibly lovers depending upon your preference) just wake up the next morning to see yuu on on couch in their common area with grim sleeping on them

-🐝

I love this alot but especially if it's a case that no one can figure out how the hell you're getting into their dorms. Even though they're easily accessible through the mirrors, the dorms are probably locked from the outside for safety reasons.

At my dorms and for most of the buildings, they were open during the day and at night they would only be accessible though student id/key cards. I think the students at NRC maybe could use their wands as their key cards, but you don't have a wand, just Grim with his stone. And people forget that Grim, even though he's just a lil ceacher....is still technically a student that can get into buildings lol.

Heartslabyul is the main victim of your sudden appearances, which makes Riddle a bit conflicted, as he understands Ramshackle is desolate, and the roof might cave in on you while sleeping... But there are RULES, and you're not supposed to leave your dorm after a certain time, AND you need permission from your housewarden to sleep in another dorm. But technically you're your own housewarden...and you did come into his dorm right before the deadline (Idia can pull up the timestamped camera footage to prove it if you ask). Ace and Cater get a kick out of seeing you in the lounge and may or may not have the urge to draw silly things on your face in marker. Trey and Deuce feel a bit bad since you are using the couch pillows to cover yourself, so they start leaving throw blankets for you to use. Riddle will get over it, eventually, and will start involving you in the dorm's morning routine and chores if you're there often enough.

The next most common is Scarabia, mostly because their lounge is super luxurious and Kalim doesn't care that you sneak in. In fact, he starts anticipating it (he can be perceptive if he really pays attention) and will sit in the lounge waiting for your arrival for an impromptu sleep over! It only becomes a problem when Jamil wakes up and goes to get Kalim up for the day only to realize that he's gone and oh god where is Kalim did he get kidnapped oh shit Jamil is gonna get murdered by Kalim and his own—WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING IN THE LOUNGE—PREFECT????? You promptly get banned for a few weeks before the cycle continues again.

For the next dorms, it's a tie between Savanaclaw and Diasomnia. Mostly because they're not as comfortable, like yeah Savanaclaw has a pool in the lounge and Diasomnia is a cool gothic castle but...they're not comfy to sleep in. Scarabia gets hot, but at least the lounge is comfy, Savanaclaw doesn't have loads of cushions, pillows, and blankets. Leona doesn't care much though, and he had you over once before, so as long as you don't disrupt his sleep again, do what you want. And Diasomina, while you'd be welcomed with open arms by Malleus, is kinda creepy...especially in the lounge....and you've woken up with Malleus or Lilia hovering over you, unblinking, staring until you wake up. They just want to greet you good morning! It's...sweet...but unnerving. But if you can't go to Heartslabyul, and you've been banned by Jamil from Scarabia for a while, then it's a toss of a coin between those two.

Your last options, in order, are Octavinelle, Pomefiore, and Ignihyde. Octavinelle, well they have a very lovely lounge with lovely ambience and quite comfortable couches! But, last time you got found by one of the students, you got reported to Azul who promptly made you work in exchange for sleeping in the dorm without reserving a room. Yeah, you forgot that Azul has rooms available to rent out, you can't get around that by sleeping in the lounge, work off your debt! It becomes a game almost, to see if they can find you before you sneak out of the dorm. You've been unsuccessful, as Jade and Floyd has an uncanny ability to find you no matter where you are. Once, as a joke and in retaliation, you managed to sneak into Azul's office and sleep on his couches. You'd planned to wake up and sit in his chair so that you could turn around with Grim in your lap like a James Bond villain (Grim asked what a James Bond was), but you ended up passing out for a solid 10 hours from how comfortable you were. You woke up to your head in Jade's lap, petting you like a cat, and legs over Floyd's lap, as Azul worked on paperwork. When you woke up, very confused and groggy, he asked how you would like to split your ten owed hours of shifts.

Pomefiore, while lovely, is not your favorite choice. Mostly because you don't want to deal with Vil. He's actually the most concerned out of everyone that you've resorted to sleeping in lounges, it's not good for your health. And as we all know, he is very concerned with his dorm members maintaining a good health and general wellness. So the moment he hears that you are sleeping around in the lounges, he waits, even puts Rook on watch for you. The moment you pass out in his lounge? He's snatching you and nearly motherhenning you. He's pushing you to sleep in one of the dorms, most likely Epel's room, since you're familiar with each other. And now, you've also been tied in with the same routine and rules as Epel. You appreciate the concern, but you don't know how to tell Vil that you kinda like the fun of running around between dorms and freaking people out. He probably wouldn't be amused, so you manage to escape his grasp and stay at Ramshackle for a while to let him cool down (he's a bit offended that you wanted to escape, so now he's biding his time and waiting for you to eventually crawl back when the other dorms are occupied.)

Ignihyde is last because, quite frankly, that bish look cold! And uncomfortable! And a lot creepier than Diasomnia!!! And also, Idia and Ortho have that dorm covered in camera and security measures, so you're not getting in. Sorry I don't make the rules, Idia just really doesn't want to deal with you in the lounge, especially when he runs out for midnight munchies and has to hold back his scream when he sees a random person in his dorm and oh no it's just you. Prefect, what the fuck?

[yuri-is-online]

ooohh 500 already?? it feels like the 300 special was just a few weeks ago ✧⁠\⁠(⁠>⁠o⁠<⁠)⁠ﾉ⁠✧ can i get prompt 6 with ace and deuce together?? hehe congrats again, more milestones to come!! (⁠*⁠＾⁠3⁠＾⁠)⁠/⁠～⁠♡

6. Crowley has decided to put together a murder mystery for the whole ball and you've been the first one "killed." Whoever is playing detective seems really upset about that.

So I was uncertain if by together you meant Aduece + Yuu or Ace + Yuu and Deuce + Yuu. As it stands, I had an idea for Aduece + Yuu and requests for Ace and Deuce separately, so this post will contain Aduece + Yuu. I'm confused just writing that, but I hope it makes sense. If this is not what you wanted, you are more than welcome to make a second request. There is no time limit on that.

notes: they/them used for Yuu, what's worse than one angry guard dog? Two angry guard dogs! Or is it two and a half if you count Grim I guess. The other event requests can be found on my masterlist.

Aduece

"And our first victim for tonight will be the prefect! I would have expected them to be the last victim how very odd." Crowley almost sounds sympathetic and you almost sound interested, you even let out a little "oh no" almost relived whoever was playing the murderer had decided to give you such a nice excuse to sit the next rounds of what you are certain is going to turn into a massive dick measuring contest. Grim does not share your gracious nature.

"This is bullshit!" He thrashes around in your embrace making grabby paws at the gathered crowd as if he is really going to make Mr. X regret killing you. "Just my hench human's name got pulled, why's that mean I gotta go?!"

"Aww, Grimmy, it's ok, we all know you'd be next." Ace laughs but there's a strange strain to it. He's run his fingers nervously through his hair several times now, and now that you've noticed he tries a more familiar smile, dropping his hand to tap his thigh instead. "Don't wait up for us, ok? Juice and I aren't going home anytime soon." You roll your eyes at the joke before giving both your friends a quick hug.

"For luck." You say with a quick wink before shuffling yourself and Grim up to the balcony soothing him with promises of food that you're sure will still be up there.

As soon as you are gone all pretense between the two drops as they both look at the identical cards they had been bickering over just a few moments earlier.

"I still think we should tell the headmage." Is what Deuce says, but he's missing his usual determination Ace finds so cute and yet so annoying every time he suggests the three of you cut class. "When he was explaining the rules he clearly said that there was only supposed to be one ca-"

"Then he can just deal with looking stupid." Snaps Ace. "It's not like he ever does anything else. Look can't you hear what they're saying about Yuu?" It's a low blow, they both can hear the snickering of the usual suspects, but Deuce grinds his teeth particularly sharply to find so many new people joining in. "They think it's funny." Ace says, voice dropping low and deathly serious with what he tells himself is just the intention to rile Deuce up. They both look up at the gallery, Yuu looks.... happy. Content with their lot as if they never expected any other outcome. It's beautiful, that carefree smile that turns into a pure beam once they notice the two of them looking up at them, and there is something breathtaking about knowing only the two of them can bring it out.

That seals it. Lovely as it is, the sight is wrong. You should be down here between the two of them laughing at the loosers who thought they were good at hiding themselves among the masses. Surprisingly, it's Deuce who takes the lead, turning away from Yuu and placing a firm hand on Ace's shoulder to convince him to do the same.

"It's probably one of the guys from one of the other classes." Class 1A wasn't completely loyal to each other, this was NRC after all, but all of them like the three of you. And they all knew better than to do anything to you when Ace and Deuce had you sat snugly between them like you had been all night. "If I had to make a guess, it's probably one of the guys from Leona's class."

"What makes you think it's an upper classmen?" Whispers Ace, shaking himself together and yanking Deuce back to the center of the ballroom to get a better look at the crowd.

"They wouldn't be afraid of us. And any Savanaclaw students in Leona's class would have a bone to pick with Yuu after that whole incident with Azul." It's surprisingly solid reasoning from Deuce, real proof he could probably hack it as a Magic Marshal, and Ace makes sure to take note so he can tease him about it later. But he's not entirely sold on it being pure skill that's gotten Deuce this far.

Seriously Ace thought beastmen were supposed to be good at hunting.

"Hey there, buddy." Ace throws an elbow into the Savanaclaw extra's side (partially to throw him off by annoying him but mostly to keep Deuce from jumping him immediately). "Having fun tonight? I'd have thought a big guy like you would find this whole thing boring."

"What's a fresh punk like you know about that?" His snort would be low and intimidating if Deuce wasn't so angry. "It's always the weakest links that get picked off first, I don't have to worry about shit till later."

"Oh you mean like Epel?" The upperclassman stiffens at Deuce's question, line of sight snapping away from their oblivious friend and back to the now maniacly grinning freshman who has decided to forcefully elbow his other side. Ace gives a laugh that would make Floyd proud as Deuce continues. "Cause I know you wouldn't be planning on him being your next victim, unless you really are as dumb as you look."

"What the hell are you!"

"Oi headmage!" Yells Ace, making sure to flourish the detective card in a way he very smugly thinks only he could. "We got your guy, bag him and tag a better one in next time, yeah?"

A general groan comes up from the crowd with how quickly the game is over, with Crowley quickly agreeing to another round as you once again find yourself sandwiched between your bickering friends.

"Oh come on there's no way the headmage intended for you to be the detective." Ace huffs, head firmly rested on your lap so he can glare up at Deuce resting on your shoulder. "I'm the one always taking care of you two, clearly it was intended for me."

"I'm the one who caught the killer though." A kinder version of that manic grin is firmly fixed to Deuce's face as you sigh and check the time on your phone wondering if they'll get in trouble with Riddle if they stay up here with you longer.

"Boys Boys, you're both pretty." That shuts them up, but maybe not for the reason you think. "But won't you lose your heads if you stay here much longer?"

"Eh I'm sure Riddle will understand." Ace smiles and though Deuce sputters in hesitation he makes now move to leave. "Besides, if he does not, we'll just bunk with you tonight."

"You're worth the trouble." Says Deuce, with a bit more force than usual and you sigh.

"Honestly, I should be saying that to the two of you." And though it should be said with a bit more meaning, instead you say it with a laugh.

A laugh that's quickly returned.

[i-arch-my-backula]

Slashers on Valentines day

Happy Valentines day everyone. I'm single so I don't really have anyone to celebrate with but who cares when I still get chocolate and can watch a campy slasher movie centered around the holiday. This is kind of a random selection of slashers including Danny because he's my baby girl and I saw really cute Valentines day themed fan art of him. Anyway I hope y'all enjoy <3

Includes: Hannibal Lecter, Harry Warden, Candyman, The Sinclair brothers, Amanda Young and, Danny Johnson

Warnings: Mentions of murder and gore kind of

Hannibal Lecter

He's obviously cooking for you today. You're not to step foot into the kitchen because he's taking care of all of it himself. You're getting spoiled today and that's final.

He's going to buy you something expensive that you'll love. It might be a ring or a new bag, maybe an entirely new outfit. Whatever he sees fit to give you. He doesn't expect you to get him anything but if you do he's very thankful.

He's probably taking you to the opera with him. Something high brow and fancy for his lovely s/o, nothing but the best for you on a very special day.

I can see him spending the evening drawing you too. You're probably in his study, drinking wine and doing something relaxing while he sketches you and recites love poems.

Harry Warden

He's going to be busy murdering people on Valentines day so he's not going to be able to do much of anything with you.

But he is going to bring you whatever he thinks you'll like. Flowers, chocolate, a card addressed to one of his victims, whatever he finds he's giving you.

He doesn't really enjoy having decorations up for Valentines day. Having pink and red themed decor is fine with him but explicit Valentines day decorations aren't his jam.

While he isn't there on the actual day, he's going to be there after Valentines day and that's when he's going to shower you with love and affection.

Candyman

It's going to a very romantic day overall for you. Lots of your favorite flowers around your house/apartments waiting for you when you wake up. Maybe some chocolate but probably a little honeycomb too.

He's going to steal you all of the gifts he gets you. Mostly expensive jewelry he thinks you'll like or you've pointed out to him.

Oh and he is most definitely writing you a love letter pages long, listing off every detail of why he loves you and what he would do for you.

Of course he's going to be spending the entire day with you. You're not going out but you're going to enjoy time spent with him in your house together.

Vincent Sinclair

He's going to give you whatever gifts he can make/get you for the occasion. He doesn't have access to most traditional things for Valentines day so it might just be a painting or a love letter, but he's trying ok?

He wants to spend the entire day with you. He usually spends a lot of time with you anyway but especially on this special day. He'll keep Bo away so he doesn't make stupid comments about you two, and Lester won't bother you at all.

He might want to try slow dancing with you since he's never done it before and he sees couples do it in romance movies all of the time. He might suck at it but he doesn't really care because it's with you.

He's going to end the day with a nice dinner between the two of you. He pulled out an old cook book to use for this and he did a pretty good job at cooking it too.

Lester Sinclair

He's going to get you all of the stereotypical gifts, chocolate, flowers, a card, etc. He just loves you so much and he wants to spoil you every once and awhile you know?

He's going to take you out to an actual town where the two of you can really be a couple. You're probably just going to be walking/driving around and getting dinner but it's the thought that counts.

Lots of physical affection too. Like he wants to always have a hand on you today. He thinks that he can't fully express how much he loves outside of giving you hugs, kissing you, holding your hand, etc.

He's probably taking pictures of all of this. I can see him being a sentimental person so spending a special day with you is something that he's going to want to document.

Bo Sinclair

He thinks the whole idea of the day is stupid. But that doesn't mean he isn't going to do something special with you for Valentines day. He can be a gentleman when he wants to and today is one of those days.

He'll probably get you flowers. Nothing too special, he'd ask Vincent what flowers to get if he doesn't know your favorite flowers are. I feel like Vincent could go off on a big thing about the different meanings of flowers but he knows Bo doesn't care so he'll just say roses.

I feel like he would maybe get you a ring that matches one of his. Partly to sell the idea that you're married to victims, partly because he's a possessive guy and likes the idea of you always being reminded who you're dating.

He also expects you to be romantic. He knows you can't do much because you can't leave town without him but he still expects you to do something like cook him something special or write him a love letter if you're that kind of person.

Amanda Young

She also thinks Valentines day is stupid. She's never been much of a romantic and probably has never been in a healthy romantic relationship, let alone an actual relationship.

Like Bo she's still getting you something. If you're like her she's getting you a gothic box of chocolate and maybe flowers (They do sell gothic boxes of chocolate and I'm in love with them).

She will happily go out to dinner with you. She somewhat expects you to plan it and pay for at least half of the dinner. I can see her getting dressed up if it's a more fancy restaurant and looking so pretty.

She's also going to rub it in Hoffmans face that she has a partner who loves her and that she got spoiled while he probably sat home alone doing whatever he does.

Danny Johnson

He's going to make a scrap book of all of his favorite pictures of you and share it with you. Pointing out the ones he likes the best or ones with fun stories behind them.

Because he's an obsessive little shit he knows all of your favorite things and he's going to get them for you. Expect to find your favorite flowers, candy, drink, etc on your kitchen table in the morning.

Maybe does a romantic photo shoot with you. He wants to pick out some aspects of it but will let you pick out outfits to wear. He's going to spend half the time actually taking pictures and half posing you so he has an excuse to touch you.

If you're as morbid and crazy as him then he's going to get you an actual heart. It might be human, it might be an animals heart he got at the butcher, ok it's probably a real heart that he says is an animals.

[istharoth]

In love with a 2-D Character?! Obscuary Edition!

Blurb: In which you are a character in a popular game the Tokyo debunker boys are coincidentally in love with.

Edward Hart

Granted his favourite character was not part of the selection when the game was first released, he chose Romeo's favourite character.

Why? Because he's seen one (1) fanart of you and Romeo's favourite character looked similar to you.

ABSOLUTELY LOVES YOU, you're so. You're hilarious, he absolutely gets everything you do.

Fandom-wise, he's pretty lax about everything, even in-game farming.

He cannot access the next chapter? Oh well, YouTube it is.

But he's a whale. Uses the Obscuary bar profits to pull on your banner

Gets you maxed out!!

He's the biggest fan of everything fandom. Fanfiction, videos, art, edits. Everything.

He even enjoys watching character discourse because it's amusing.

Isn't addicted to the game, just addicted to hearing your voice.

Has Rui and Lyca go to comic-cons to buy merch of you. Probably has used super-chats on your va if they stream.

He just wants to show his support

(Too much support that the va has made a specific message for him in your voice.)

Probably the biggest supporter of rps too, he enjoys all the headcanons

Rui Mizuki

Sweet sweet Rui, he doesn't usually play otome games. (he's going into this thinking it's an otome game.)

Is kinda disappointed he can't vr it out

Does not choose you as his first choice, chose the first character on screen because he accidentally pressed them

laments it after meeting you in Chapter 1! Your banners take way too long and he has horrendous luck

Your SR won't come home, it's one thing but why won't your R card come home either!? (This is me ranting. Rui come home :<)

Is the victim of many lost 50/50 + banner ending when he needed one more 10 pull for a guaranteed character.

Drinks made after you are an absolute must.

Is the kind of person who is very active in a fandom then just disappears for a while and becomes very active again.

YEAH during that activity, he's leaving kudos/comments on every fanfiction. Maybe he's even writing a few, but won't post them. They're for his own eyes + i feel he's very cautious about showing his art.

Because art essentially is a part of you, and even the drinks he creates are all carefully catered to someone's tastes. Similar to his writing and art, he's just not very keen on showing it.

Re-reads his own work though, just to giggle about it.

Lyca Colt

Omg, wait, he's a bit confused about the entire game, the rhythm game especially but he gets the hang of it.

Gets pouty when he can't do a mission, and that stops him from continuing to read the story.

But! Anyways, onto you.

Likes your design + thinks you're kinda cool.

(IS ABSOLUTELY FUCKING DEVASTATED WITH WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU IN THE STORY.)

Trad fanartist Lyca? Trad fanartist Lyca.

in cons, he's seeing them in the artist lane, he's getting sales made for your future banners. (Obscuary funds are an afterthought)

Also one of the "Pulls for everyone, doesn't really care who he gets but has a few characters he will avoid pulling.)

He's the type to get jealous when someone else likes you.

You know the "Please respect mine and Gojo's space, we're married and I don't like you shipping yourself with him," (Paraphrased) YEAH, that but not exactly like that. He's just keeping the jealously inside.

Probably really chill about the game. Doesn't really read fanfiction.

He just sees Rui or Ed read some, reads one passage, likes it and draws it out.

Prev [Hotarubi]

[witch-of-the-threshold]

A Rant about (XIII) Death

There are some cards I have very strong opinions on, and of which, I would likely get into fights with other cartomancers about. One of them is number XIII in the Major Arcana, Death.

It's quite fashionable nowadays to say, "Oh, but Death is a good card! It means 'transformation' and 'new beginnings'! That it means 'death' is a misunderstanding!"

Granted, the name on the card is not always linked to its origin or meaning. Judgment is often misunderstood for that reason. (That's a whole rant on its own for another day.) But in the case of Death, not only is it called "Death" and only ever "Death," but the Grim Reaper in the armor of war is in the depiction. What more do you need?

Soldiers sent to war don't die for their country; they just die.

— Dan Olson, Folding Ideas

I often wonder if people's fear of facing the dark implications of the Death card, and the Tower card for that matter, have to do with their own fear of death and victimhood. There are certainly other cards in the deck that reference or more directly mean "rebirth" and "new beginnings." Does their own mortality and fragility scare them so much that they insist Death be The Fool 2.0?

Death, at least for us sentient and social beings, is real. And what's more, the grief that follows death and trauma is very, very real. And I worry about the serious mismatch between a reader and their querent should the latter not be in a place to hear the reader's toxic positivity when Tarot's darkest cards are pulled.

In the Waite-Smith card, the sun can be seen rising on the horizon between two towers. I've heard this interpreted as the "good" aspect of the card. I'm reminded of a story recounted about the speaker's friend who'd just lost their father to a sudden and unexpected death the day before: she, the grieving, called him first thing in the morning, and when he answered the phone, she spoke with quiet, indignant rage, "The sun is shining," and hung up.

It is the gravest insult that the sky never reflects the apocalyptic state of our sundered hearts. This, too, is one of Death's painful lessons.

Of course, the appearance of the Death card needn't mean a literal death. It more often is an urgent reminder of mortality. We all die, full stop.

It's a bit tangential, but also important I think to note that, in the Waite-Smith version on which most modern tarot is based, Death's primary victim is a royal. I can't help but think of La Catrina with her luxuriously expensive headwear and whose visage, now a staple of Día de los Muertos in Mexico, was meant to remind that death comes for everyone, regardless of rank.

Death comes for us all, so, what will you do with this insignificantly short amount of time you have?

...let us eat and drink; for to morrow we shall die.

ー Isaiah 22:13.5

In its most "positive" form, when Death appears, it asks the querent to question their own life and consider what must end for them to truly live, lest they lose something of themselves forever and before all chances are gone.

Value the life you live, the time you have, and the people you are with. It does not last, and neither do you.

Memento mori.

[prettynalilmagic]

ℙ𝕚𝕔𝕜 𝕒 ℂ𝕒𝕣𝕕: 𝕊𝕙𝕒𝕕𝕠𝕨 𝕎𝕠𝕣𝕜

I believe me and everyone else should be focused on shadow work, because it's a new year and I know shadow work doesn't sound fun but in my opinion its more fulfilling than love readings because there's already so much of those on any tarot platform/community.

Pick a Pile from 1-2-3-4

Pile one

Bride in a Cage

With the deck I use for the overall tone of the reading an oracle deck by Laura Sava and its overall meant is to be used for shadow work. And each card has a moon phase attached to each card, the phase attached to your card is Denial. So that's the first thing I noted and the card itself is based on how situation and environment being fulfilled by materials that wont in the long run fix or solve any issues. You can buy certain items that will fill something that is unpleasant till you die and still be unsatisfied with where you are in life. It's a cycle, there's something deep down you don't want to accept weather you know it or not, sometimes we have issues that we cannot see, and that's the sole purpose of therapy and shadow work. There's no shame here, everyone at some point uses something to avoid reality that we find unsatisfying. Now I pulled some more cards from a different deck to support and get more information on what spirt really wants to call out. And overall, I see a lot of personal belief that sometimes it better to see the positive or more so focus on what you can do to walk away from the bad things you are faced with. I think this is something that you learned from a young age where you were shamed by reacting to the negativity that happened. That being any sort of sadness or anger. Yes, being happy and not sad or mad, sounds good at first but that completely neglects the reality of hardships. Your smart about how you react to life, and you understand where when something bad happens, you can avoid being in that victim mode by ignoring whatever that is upsetting. The great thing about life is that life is not black and white. There's a lot of good things that will come your way but in order for you feel fulfilled and appreciative of those things, you have to accept all the bad stuff as well. It's not something that something to avoid. I am getting strongly that pile one is afraid of being pessimistic and that they will do anything to show themselves or others that they are filled with love and good and nothing else, but your human. To be human means to be unperfect. You think strongly that the way you think shapes your reality and yes that is true but there's only so much that can achieve until you have to face truth. Some things can't be fixed with positive thinking and manifestation. Unfortunately, life isn't some LaLa world like that, don't get me wrong, I'm not shitting on positive people, but there is a such thing as toxic positivity. You're stopping your own growth by looking at life through rose-colored glasses. Your shadow wants you to accept being a victim at times and being someone who can be pushed down by something. Understanding where you got hurt is how a real breakthrough can happen, you're not allowing the cycle of acceptance to come through as beautiful as it can.

Pile 2

Sacrifice

Pile two, your shadow wants you to acknowledge that you are suffering for the well-being of something else. And your moon phase is associated with anger, which tells me that while you are acknowledging the suffering you are being subjected to tells me you aren't happy or pleased with it. Kinda like it's an "Oh well what can I do about it, it fucking sucks but it is what it is." That type of vibe. I'm not just pulling an oracle card I am pulling from a separate deck and what I can see that you have basically given up yet there's still this sense of hope that things will change and that whatever situation happened or is happening is making you feel like you have to wait and just continue to be sacrificed till you can leave and move onto better circumstances. But there's also a sense of given up hope it's kind of up and down energy. I had to pull a second shadow card because the energy was little too confusing and I needed more to back up to why the cards were popping up with somewhat different messages, and I got Temple of my body and its essentially telling me that people/situations have/are doing stuff to your body. Something has been making you feel like you cannot win, there's always going to be something that is disrespectful to your own wants and needs in order for them to obtain the power and wants that they desire. This can be anything from school, money, family, love or work. It can be one or multiple things at once or at different points in your life. And it's very overbearing for yourself. It's too many hardships, feeling like you're never going to be able to fulfill something else outside of yourself. That must be so challenging, and you must feel like you have to be as strong as you can be and that you might not be able to. I'm getting maybe you think you're forced to suffer until your old enough to run away from whatever it is that you're sacrificing yourself to. Your shadow wants to advise you that in order to overcome the sacrifices, you need be able to see you don't have to be a worm left out for the birds. You're not a sacrifice, yes it feels like you have to keep doing stuff to just exist whilst still feeling like whatever you do is never enough but learn to structure yourself. How can you slowly overcome this feeling? What I need to do to overcome this feeling? Why am I so depressed and angry about it? Truly dive deep into yourself, because wither or not you are truly stuck, which you most likely are, it won't always be that way. Acknowledge your pain, struggles and see what you can do to overcome it, not avoid it. Or dwell in it. Just understanding what you are able to do silently will give you at least some form of control and I can see that there's clearly very little control you have with where you are in life. What are things that make you feel in control? What makes you feel not in control? Can you overcome it? If not, what can you do besides just see that? You can find little ways to feel a sense of control and relief from just reflecting and doing small things to fulfill your needs in tiny ways. If you need to escape or walk away from something in the future, plan and make goals on what needs to be done in order to be prepared for when that can become your new beginning.

Pile 3

Alone In the world

The phase attached to your card is Acceptance. There's been months, weeks, days, hours, and seconds that you have waited for something. Weather its love from friends, family or a significant other, you have been on edge waiting for some reassurance and presence of hope for love. And nothing really has fulfilled you. Maybe someone did come by, but it wasn't what you thought it would be or maybe no one ever will be able to fulfill you to the extent you have believed you needed. Now your shadow self is saying it hasn't happened, will it happen for you ever? If it does will it be the same as what you have longed for? There's a concerning lack of separation of satisfaction and love, those are two separate things that should not be used to mean the same thing. With love does not fulfill satisfaction. You do not need to be in love or loved to be satisfied, why have you allowed yourself to feel controlled by the presence of love. You should not allow yourself to be bitter, spiteful of life or yourself, you have to learn to see yourself as the one thing that is enough. A person will never be something to fulfill you unless its yourself. You're turning yourself into a victim of loneliness because you're attaching too much value onto someone who isn't you. Do you know yourself enough? Do you think you aren't enough to feel fulfilled on just yourself? If so, why? Why do you not see how easy it is for you to love yourself. You already have the desires and wants you could get from someone else? If you don't have those desires and needs that you seek from others, how come it's not possible for you? Do you only seek that in others because you are uncomfortable with you lacking something? You shouldn't be afraid to know yourself or be afraid that you think you're not enough. Being in a relationship before fulfilling your own self-worth is not as great as it sounds, personally I'm in a relationship but I will accidentally ruin moments that can be good because of my own fear of myself and how unfulfilled I feel with how much I love myself and I'm not even the type of person who struggles with always feeling to need to be loved to be happy. If the situation arises that you stumble into a relationship or situationship that's fine but understand that you should love yourself before allowing someone else to fill in that worth. Prince charming may never come and if that is something that is too upsetting, there's some work that needs to be done to begin understanding why that's so upsetting.

Desiring someone else is okay but in a healthy doses, your partner should be an added plus, not your entire happiness. Stop romanticizing unhealthy attachments to others.

Pile 4

The child I was Meant to be.

Your shadow wants you to accept that you are capable of growing. I'm getting that there's a lot that needs to be done, in order to become replanted. Some change has to be made, and that's okay. Life is full of growth and decay. Don't villainize yourself, the worst you can do is avoid the bad things in life because then that stops your own growth. There's a repeating issue that is very uncomfortable for you pile four. There's this greed to fulfill with your own needs. It's always about your issues and not others' problems. Your shadow wants you to learn how to manage that greed and "evil" (nobody is truly evil if you can prevent yourself from repeating negative cycles. What is it that makes you think that your too broken or off-putting to be fixed or reborn?

You might need to tie up some loose ends and heal others that you knowingly did wrong. Make sure you give the justice the people you have hurt. You have to let go of an unhealthy attachment to your own self and that desire you feel that is stopping you from being "a good person." You might have to leave something behind that you think is so good or desirable. It's difficult but you're not a hopeless cause, nobody is unable to never work on themselves, if that means walking away from what you have projected yourself do that. It's seems scary to work on becoming a better you for yourself because then you have to accept the aspects you repress but once you accept you can learn to work through it. You can mourn over who you were and accept the new you when you're healing and yourself work is fulfilled. You are capable of it but are struggling to see that it can happen. In order to plant that seed to grow the new you, you have to cut off the old ways that poison your growth. It's going to be hard but it's doable. Forgive yourself and learn why you say or do things. don't justify them, learn from who you are in order to learn about who you can be.

[burybirds-archive]

mercy

pairing ┈┈┈ tim drake & helena bertinelli

tags ┈┈┈ age regression, mommy issues, cross dressing, mother-daughter relationship, childhood trauma, feminization, maternal instinct, references to depression, short

“Ah, Tim. C’mon in.” There’s a small smile on Helena’s face, which helps to settle his nerves. 

He lowers his eyes as he steps past the threshold of her apartment. “If you’re busy...”

Helena shuts the door behind her. “Of course I’m not busy. I want to see you. C’mon.” 

Tim tucks hair behind his ear. His dad hates that he’s growing it out. Apparently it makes him look like a delinquent. Bruce thinks that he's trying to look like Dick. He seems subtly disapproving.

“I have to change...” he murmurs. 

Helena pats him on the shoulder, then nods toward her bedroom. “Yeah, you do. Go ahead.” 

Tim slips into her bedroom and wrestles off his baggy jacket. He kneels before the chest of clothing at the foot of her bed, opening it with a deep breath. The dresses inside have been folded with care. They're all in shades of white, pink or robin's-egg blue. 

Springs squeak as Tim perches on the edge of the mattress, slipping on a pair of stockings. It takes him a moment to pick out a dress. He settles on a white one with a bow at the waist. The fabric flounces around his knees when he takes a seat at the vanity. He brushes through his black hair. 

Helena is waiting for him, standing in the kitchen. Her expression is faraway as she sips on stale coffee. She doesn't look up until she hears the creak of the bedroom door opening. Tim steps quietly into the hallway. 

"Oh, there you are," she says, as though she hadn't recognized him until now. "Come here. Let mommy see you."

Tim makes his approach. His knees knock as he looks shyly at Helena, hands folded at his waist. 

"You always pick the prettiest dresses," Helena murmurs as she sets a hand on the side of Tim's head, fingers carding through his hair. 

"The bows match, mommy," Tim replies, a touch less shy.

"They do! You're matching, how pretty," Helena hums, turning away to drain the last of her coffee in the sink. She pats Tim on his backside, urging him toward the couch. "Go on, go sit down."

Tim waits on the couch, feet swaying. A minute later, Helena arrives and sweeps him up in her arms. He's all giggles, scooped up and set down in her lap. "I missed you..." he admits, a little breathless.

"I missed you too, sweetheart," Helena replies, rubbing a hand up and down the length of his back. "Did you have a good week?"

There is a brief lull of silence. Every week puts more distance between himself and Bruce. He can do nothing but throw himself into his work: an investigation on Professor Pyg that has him running in circles. 

Dick called him yesterday. He could hear him telling Damian to be quiet and digging fingers into his side to make him laugh. It's something they used to do. 'But, uh, Tim. If you need an assist, you can call me up. I'm not wearing the cowl anymore, but—’ 

And Tim cut him off, feeling petty. 'I'm fine, Dick. I'm actually in the middle of something,' he recalls saying into the scratchy frequency of his comms device, staring down one of Pyg's victims. 

Dick's voice withered slightly. 'I'll let you go.'

Tim had retched afterward, out of guilt and exhaustion and revulsion. 

"It was a busy week, mommy," he answers, voice tight. At the memory, his eyes grow hot with unshed tears. Helena's hand settles on the back of his head. 

"Oh, no pouting..." Helena is only pretending to scold. Tim can't see it, but she's frowning with worry. She doesn't miss how his voice wavers with exhaustion. Pressing a kiss to his temple, she whispers, "I think someone needs some cuddles." 

Tim nods, eyes falling shut.

"Aww, sweetheart. C'mon, lay your head down. Mommy needs some cuddles, too." She pulls a throw blanket over them, feeling the weight of Tim's head on her chest. 

"I love you the most," Tim tells her.

"Mm..." Helena hums when she's with those big blue eyes. She feigns disbelief. "More than the stars? More than the moon?"

"Mhm! More than those," answers Tim, sounding sure of himself. 

"More than my cooking? More than... all of your stuffed animals?" Helena asks suspiciously. Her thumb comes up to stroke Tim's cheek. 

Tim lets out a little giggle. "More than those!"

After a moment, Helena brings her face closer. Her voice dips to a whisper. "More than puppies?"

"More than puppies, mommy!" Tim's smile is small but no less lovely. He kisses her cheek. "I love you the most."

Helena is always a little flustered by the sweetness. She presses kisses to his forehead. "I love you the most too."

The adrenaline keeps Red Robin going for a good ten minutes, but the thugs don't stop coming and he's well past outnumbered. A hit to the chin knocks him off-balance. Soon he's swaying on his feet, spitting blood. He sucks in a breath and staggers backward.

Huntress is patrolling the Bowery when she hears shouts. She lands on the metal floor of the fire escape, cape billowing. In the corner of her eye, she glimpses bright red fabric.

Tim tries to pull himself up, but he stumbles. 

Helena swings in, knocking one of the men over. Her boots collide with his rib-cage, after which she launches herself head-first into the fray. The mere sound of her arrival causes some of them to flee. Capes have a reputation in this city. 

The last few make their stand and she takes out her cross-bow, training it at someone's face. Fears sets in fast. They take off into the night. 

Tim's heart is hammering in his chest. Professor Pyg. The thugs. His only lead. He can't stop thinking, even though he's almost surely concussed. Blood trickles from his nose. 

Helena kneels at his side, getting a better look at his injuries. She lifts his chin with two fingers. "Don't move," she warns.

"I have to... You don't understand, Pyg is— I have to..." Tim is panicking, unable to get the words out. His body is screaming at him to stay down, blood blurring his vision. His mouth tastes like copper.

"Red Robin, stay down," says Helena, an edge to her voice. But he won't stop fighting her, not for one blessed second. He's sucking air through his teeth, attempting to get up. 

She knows that he needs medical attention, and soon. Any more unnecessary movement and he could pass out, after which transporting him will be absolute hell. It's not as though she has the same connections as Batman. 

Tim is stammering about a pig, groping at the brick wall behind him. His lip is busted, his words slurred. "I have to... I have to s-stop him..." 

"Hey." Helena takes hold of his face. 

He shakes his head, resisting still.

"Listen to me," she says with a trace of desperation. "Listen to mommy."

And Tim's eyes widen behind the white lenses of his domino mask. He struggles against her grip, but with less strength. A small noise of protest leaves his lips, nearly a whine. He's caught between Red Robin and something else, this little girl that's terrified and doesn't know why everything hurts. His lower lip trembles.

"No..."

Helena knows that he'll hate her when he comes to. And yet, she doesn't let up. She can't. "Yes," she repeats, tightening her hold on his wrists. "Listen to mommy. Listen."

Tim sniffs, feeling so much smaller. His thoughts grow simpler, less complicated. Everything hurts. He doesn't want to fight anymore. He doesn't like this costume, all torn-up and bloody. The dark is scary. Why is it so dark?

Just like that, he stops fighting Helena and slips back to the ground. His voice grows soft. "Mommy...?"

"Yes," Helena answers, letting out a breath she didn't know she was holding. "Yes, baby. Mommy's here. I need you to hold still, okay? Can you promise mommy you'll hold still?"

Tim's heart stutters when he sees the masked woman in front of him, shadowed by the streetlights. 

Helena lifts her mask without a second thought, watching the tension leave Tim's shoulders. He recognizes her. "Promise me."

"I promise," he murmurs. 

"Okay. Okay, good girl," she says under her breath, holding his head steady. "That's good."

[papirouge]

You know what? I did it! 💁🏾‍♀️

NEVER FORGET

(white) Radfem are actually*not* ok with female "sticking together" if that excludes them and will swear up and down that sex it the ultimate oppression axis and gaslight non white women into thinking it's pointless to call out the lingering racism in feminist spaces

Radfem are not *ok* with women "sticking together" if that means showing solidarity with Palestians WOMEN and pretend they only do so to spite Israel/Zionist (the main character syndrome is HUGE on this one)

Radfem are not okay with (DV victim) women sticking together when they rally to defend someone they consider victim of DV

Calling other women "handmaiden" is so feminist💗. Can't wait when the moid are gonna throw it back at radfem lol

Radfem are not okay with women making their own opinion and pull out the most ridiculous condescending copium statement about how they only behave "out of fear" to explain their audacity to have.... different opinions ??

Radfem are not okay with tradwives lifestyle either. Peep the same condescending tone ("they've been conditioned" etc), but we're supposed to believe these women are ok respecting other women's opinion??

Radfem are not okay with women....just existing as..... heterosexual?? Talk to me again who's the misogynist seeking excuses to ridicule women...

"I'm notoriously violent" ...against another woman... I wonder how the "reactionary violence" card they love to pull out whenever a woman gets exposed as physically abusive will play out there LOL

So please, never believe radfem when they make their sassy comebacks about how leFtiSt don't respect the choices or life decisions of other people. They can be as much controlling and manipulative as the people they make fun of. But way more manipulative because they will gaslight you into believing that they actually bigger than that. At least liberals are quite open with cancelling people. Radfem will flip flop between sisterly compelling women to reflect every of their choice....and then guilty shame women for their life choice, OR imply they're intellectually impaired to make sound decisions, and need radfemistan to provide them the light. Oh and let's not even talk about abortion which is the only choice a woman can make that should NEVER be questioned - make up, plastic surgery should be deeply scrutinized and criticized, but abortion? NEVER.

Zionist radfem will say that shit and then literally freak at tradwives, right wing women, or female Johnny Depp (never forget they made a whole name -"Deppford Wives"- to mock them. ot for the moids & incels supporting him. NOT for the men, only for the women.... Sorry but I can't not find ironic that so called feminists found the urge to target the women of that group to make fun of), antagonizing to the point of getting comfortable spouting the vilest and most degrading (sexual) slurs at them 🤡

Like I literally could make that post changing a few words to elaborate on radfem behavior whenever they spot a woman "wrongthink"

Oh next time radfem go like "radical feminists is a left movement uwu" everytime people calls them out on their suspicious accointances with the right wing sphere (TRA have been saying forever radfem where white supremacists with a feminist sugar coat - and when I see their outpouring support of Israel I feel like they were right for the most part) and/or asks them why they are so prone to make/reblog posts being like "lEftiSts bE liKe- 🤪" show them posts like this.

like- are you a leftist or not? Why are you so prone to distance yourself from them if you identify your own movement as leftism?? 🤔

[writingforatwistedworld]

hi! I see that your requests are open and can I just say I love your self aware au so much, it’s so much fun! As for my request, could I get Rook, Vil and Azul (separate) with a player that gets transported to their world and dotes on them a lot? When they played the game, they would always talk to them or gush about their lines and cards. Since getting there, nothing much changes. Giving tons of compliments, occasional pet names, basically treating them super lovingly because they’re a favorite.

Aww, that's so sweet. The question is how safe this is...

Self-aware au

I do not take any responsibility for you reading this no matter which age group you are from!

WARNINGS: Yandere themes, obsessive behavior, possessive behavior, being controlled, stalking, low self-esteem

Rook/Vil/Azul-Being doted on

He is living his dream

Even when you were not besides him he was always more than just flustered whenever you gushed about him

He loved the attention

“Oh, darling! If only you knew what you do to my heart!”

He is absolutely smitten with you

So when you get here it's basically a competition which one of you is more loving

... Minus the stalking part on your side

It's like he wants to repay every single compliment you ever gave him

He is cuddly as well

He knows from the time you two were separated that you liked him so that whole confession part is way easier for him

In fact, he just skips it

There is no need for it so why bother?

You two are star-crossed lovers after all! (Yes, he goes that route)

When you gave him a pet name for the first time he nearly collapsed

Oh his heart!

Except many pet names in return after that.

He loves every single one of them

Rook swears to you daily that he will never love someone else besides you like this

Which is a good thing! Less victims!

Like I said, he stalks you

Why should he stop?!

Everything you do is absolutely perfect!

So he wants to see everything!

Say goodbye to your privacy

After all, how can you tell him to stop if you will never be able to notice what he does

He uses his skills... smart... yeah smart...

Compliments? From you?

Off no, he is not blushing!

It was just a matter of time till you would fall for him!

Vil, your ears are red

He is in truth always flustered whenever you comlimented him

And now you are also besides him... WAIT WHAT??!

Have can't hide how flustered he is this way!

But he is smooth

Very smooth

Instead of admitting how he truly feels he tries to fluster you so that you won't notice anything

But oh dear lord!

The pet names!

He isn't ready for them

That is the moment when he can't hide that blush anymore

No, that isn't makeup

This is the point where he loses all that smoothness ends

He doesn't have it in himself to call you by one as well

He has just ascended to heaven so please give him a minute

Vil is overbearing to those that he adores

So instead of affection expect him to correct your make up every day (it doesn't matter as what you identify he will do it either way)

He controls every single move of yours

To him perfection is everything

So him making sure that you are “perfect” is in his eyes a love declaration on it's own

“No, you just had lunch. You don't need that yogurt. What you are just now had exactly what your body needed and not a bit more.”

You can't make him stop even if you tell him to

He just cares for you, you know?

Oh boy... tome to test out how healthy his heart is...

Azul isn't good with romantic affection

Especially from you

When you two were still separated it was easy to hide his exploding face

Hang on till you log out and then become a Riddle 2.0

Easy, right?

Not anymore because since he met you in real life and person he was done for

There was no longer any way to hide his reactions anymore

He pulling that hat over his face so that you can't see it anymore

He also fumbles with his jacket a lot

Now my dear reader, there is one last thing you need to do so that you can deliver a critical hit

It's easy, I promise

Just smile

When you do that and call him by his pet name his legs turn into jelly

He even fell once to his knees

As wonderful as affection is Azul has far too much behind himself so even it becomes twisted in his mind as well

He thinks that you like “this” Azul

The smart, charming and cunning business man

Not the stupid, chubby octopus that he truly is (his words not mine)

Can someone please tell him how handsome his more softer side makes him?

Azul is very insecure about himself and those warm words are like fuel for the little warmth inside of him

He is always close

Got history lessons coming up? Oh he has them too!

Want to go to Sams shop for something? He also needs ingredients for Mostro Louge so he can accompany you!

It's sweet in the beginning but after a while you can't shake the feeling of being followed away

He wants, no, needs your attention! He will never let you take your eyes off of him.

[bi-bard]

Rebuilding - Emily Prentiss Imagine (Criminal Minds/Supernatural)

Title: Rebuilding

Pairing: Emily Prentiss X Winchester!Reader

Word Count: 2,989 words

Warning(s): canon-typical violence, bank robbery, mention of murder

Summary: (Season 7, Episode 23 & 24) When a crew of bank robbers take a blow at the heart of the B.A.U, the team goes on high alert. The following events prove that destruction can truly lead to more than one kind of rebuilding.

Author's Note: Oh, it has been too long.

Also, do you guys like the new OC banners? I thought they'd help differentiate the OC imagines from other imagines.

MORE OF THIS OC HERE!

---------------------------

"You can't go."

I groaned at Sam's comment.

I was on the phone with my brother while getting some things put together. I was already prepared to run off to help with the Leviathan situation they were facing. I was supposed to have at least the day off, so it was all going to work out.

"(Y/n), you probably have your own threats to worry about there," he explained.

"I'm going to hope you're referring to my normal line of threats and not the Leviathan kind of threats," I muttered.

"There's no way Dick Roman has as much pull as he does without having someone helping him get in with the government."

I ran a hand over my face. "Okay. Fine. I'll stay in D.C."

"Thank you."

"I expect a phone call as soon as you guys are done with the job, got it," I switched into older sibling mode in a moment. "We... Too much has gone wrong, got it? I need to know that you two are okay."

"I'll call, I promise."

"Alright, love you, tell Dean that I said I love him too, and please don't get yourselves killed."

"Love you too," he replied. "Have a good day."

I ended the call soon after that. "I'll try-"

My phone rang again before I could even get the sentence out.

"Hello," I said.

"We need you to come in," Hotch was on the other end of the phone.

"Why," I asked.

"Bank robbery, hostage situation."

My heart dropped for a moment. Natural reaction after what had happened earlier this year.

"On my way," I muttered.

Most cases had a pause. The jet ride there was enough to prevent complete panic, but at times like these, that just wasn't possible. J.J and ended up riding to the crime scene together. The rest of the team- Hotch, Spencer, Morgan, and Emily- were already waiting there with J.J's husband, who had gotten a shot off on one of the robbers.

She gave him a hug as we made it over.

"The media's calling them the Face Cards," Hotch explained as we walked over to the center of operations. "Seven bank robberies in seven months. They kill one person at each robbery."

"M.O?" Rossi stepped in front of the rest of us.

"Single gunshot wound. Each of the victims has bled out."

"Serial killers with a 30-day cooling-off period and we're only just hearing about this now," Emily asked.

"Headquarters characterized them as robbers first, killers second," Hotch replied.

"No one kills seven people without serious psychopathic tendencies," Spencer argued.

"I disagreed with the original assessment," Hotch said. "I was overruled."

"So, why are we here now?" I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Because crisis negotiation is overseas."

"What more do we know about them," J.J asked.

"They're organized, they're efficient. Each strike lasts about two minutes."

"They gotta be scouting the banks in advance," Morgan commented. "Why haven't we been able to I.D. them off of surveillance footage?"

"They hacked the security feed during both the initial canvas and during the robbery," Hotch led us all into the truck. Garcia was already there, hard at work. "Until the masks come back on, and then we're allowed to watch."

My stomach churned at the word 'allowed'. Like it was a show.

There's this thing with hostage situations.

Everyone wants to get it done as quickly as possible, but even that could take hours. There are just too many factors. Identifying, negotiating, minimal loss of hostages.

Too much to consider in what never felt like enough time.

We had been fortunate enough to have access to the surveillance cameras. It gave us more to work with.

But nothing was ever ideal. Especially when a crew seemed so detached when it came to their crime.

I had gone back with Emily, J.J, and Spencer to investigate the victimology.

The queen had been the only one shooting. The one that's truly in charge of the operation. Time, kills, everything but grabbing the money. Grabbing the money was the king's job.

The key was going to be turning the king and the queen against each other.

And then one of the brothers died.

That's when things started crumbling.

We made it back to the scene sometime later.

I was trying to stay focused on the case at hand, but I could feel my mind wandering. I was still thinking about Sam and Dean. I could only hope that they were just still on the job and that it wasn't the fact that no one was left to call me.

"You alright?" Emily touched my arm.

I nodded. "Sam and Dean are on a... dangerous hunt. I'm worried."

"What makes this one so dangerous," she asked.

"It just is."

Since Emily came back after faking her death, things had been different. After our fight and separation, most of the tension had seemed to clear itself. At work, at the very least. But I still hadn't gotten to the point where I was comfortable sharing every detail of what was going on. It was hard. She seemed to respect that.

She nodded to me and kept moving.

Will and Morgan were looking at blueprints of the bank when Emily, J.J, and I walked over.

"Garcia caught us up," Emily said as we made it over. "Why instigate a hostage situation?"

"What's a narcissist without attention?" Morgan replied. "She thrives on it."

"She's got to have some greater plan here," I muttered.

"We need to separate Chris and the female to find out what that is," Emily added.

"It's not gonna be hard, they're already on edge," Morgan explained.

We watched as Rossi attempted to drive a wedge between them. Attempted. It didn't quite work. Instead, he demanded to speak to the cop that shot his brother.

Most of the team went inside the truck, but Emily and I stayed outside with Rossi.

Another hostage shot every thirty seconds. That's what the promise was. Emily ran inside to tell the team the news.

"Second chain of bank robberies in a year," Rossi muttered to me. "It feels like the world is falling apart."

"That's not even the half of it," I mumbled, more to myself than him.

"What?"

I looked at him. I had to very quickly come up with an answer. "We work a dangerous job. Every case we work makes it feel like the world is falling apart."

He nodded.

They were getting ready to make an ambush, but no one moved. I made it over to Morgan, Emily, and J.J next to one of the police cars. And then, Will went walking in front of the rest of them.

J.J tried to run over as he did. Morgan and I went to grab her at the same time.

When two gunshots rang out, it felt like everyone's hearts stopped at once.

Everyone loaded into the truck again in silence. Nothing could've eased the tension. Nothing. It was just the team in silence with the buzzing of the now-dead surveillance camera.

I wanted to call that moment the first domino. Realistically, the robbery itself should've taken on the title, but Will going into that bank was the biggest escalation of the day.

After that, it was like all hell had broken loose.

The team moved. We were ready to go in.

And then, all the hostages walked out. No word or warning. They just walked out.

Clear way in.

Until the bank blew up.

I remembered hearing Rossi in my ear literally a moment before it happened.

I pushed myself off the ground, trying to ignore the ringing in my ears. I looked around the crowd. Emily had already gone inside through the back door.

J.J and I shared a look before both going to run inside.

Emily was in a room in the back, looking in on the condition of a people that had been hiding away in the back. Will was nowhere to be seen. Neither were the robbers.

J.J ran to check for Will. I stayed with Emily and the couple.

The older woman begged for us to let her stay with her husband. We tried to comfort her, promise that they were both going to be okay. I had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep myself focused.

I glanced at Emily before shaking my head and going back to the couple.

A few medics came in to help them.

"Come on," I said as Emily coughed again.

"I can stay-"

"The medics will take care of it."

She finally let me pull her outside. I got her some water and guided her back to the truck.

It was all complete chaos. Everyone was trying to make moves, but no one quite knew where to start.

We were all watching the nearby street cams. The two of them had taken a federal vehicle from the scene. Will was alive and with them. The only thing that we needed to do was figure out where they were going and what their endgame could possibly be.

We got a report of a medic getting shot. It was the only sign that Will was still alive. Cameras caught the entire event.

This was an hour after the explosion. It was the best sign that the next attack was going to be in the city.

Which only helped us so much, but it was better than nothing.

There was another man involved in the incident. He had been playing the role of one of the hostages. It was a pair of extreme adrenaline junkies.

Watching J.J spiral into tunnel vision was... scary. She was nothing short of a badass, making her angry wasn't going to end well. I wanted to say that she wouldn't cross the line, but to protect her family... I had seen that drive a lot of people to do things that they never would've done before.

When she found out that the woman from the robbery knew where she and Will lived, I'm almost certain that J.J only saw red. She hid it well, but I knew the signs. I had grown up seeing them. On Dean, on Sam, even on my dad at times... I knew the moment when all reason went out the window in the name of saving the ones you loved.

Which means I knew that J.J was unstoppable at that point.

She and Rossi took off to her place. The rest of us were on the truck. Still looking, investigating... hoping.

We went back into the explosion site.

"Why didn't they take all the money," Spencer asked.

"They were a man down and needed to get out in a hurry," Morgan replied.

"But she had this planned," I argued. "Not only that, but she was also calm the whole time. Disconnected. The man down didn't worry her and she wasn't here for the money alone."

"Everything they've said and done was for a reason," Morgan said. "But what doesn't make any sense is she switched the negotiation demand. She changed it to Chad. Chris wanted to go to Switzerland."

"They also requested a private plan, but no mention of a pilot," Emily pointed out.

"Even the dates mean something," Spencer added. "In 2004, while she was wreaking havoc abroad, he was dishonorably discharged. Then, in 2008, they likely met in Chad. And this... 2012."

"You think the attack is meant to line up with an election year," I said. "Political statement? Dishonorable discharge could be a trigger for him. Feels used and thrown out by the country he fought to protect. Could be seeking vengeance."

"It's their story," Emily replied.

"Like the woman from earlier? Her husband was her story?"

"All of the details are a part of their story," Emily nodded.

We all followed Emily back out to the truck.

"Their timelines suggest that they were both destructive before they met."

"An ex-soldier turning on their country," Strauss asked.

"It's rare, but soldiers become disenfranchised, no matter the nationality," Emily explained.

"If he met someone like-minded at that time, there'd be no stopping them," I added.

"You're thinking they met during the civil unrest in Chad in '08," Hotch replied.

"And one or both of them are pilots," Spencer added.

"If Garcia focuses on that region, specifically weapons moving in and out of Libya, there's a good chance we'll find when their paths crossed," Emily suggested. Garcia nodded, starting to work on tracking that down.

"Alright," Garcia said. "Multiple entries for a private pilot named Matthew Downs in '08, but I don't have her name."

"She had aliases," Emily replied. "That's the only way to stay a ghost. Here's the thing, they are a couple. Regardless of what we believe, they will celebrate themselves and their connection. Is there anything that happened on this date in Chad?"

"Oh, you are good, Emily Prentiss, but this news is not," I had to fight the attempt of a small grin that wanted to cross my lips when Emily got complimented. "Yes, there were multiple explosions on this date in '08."

"Where were the most casualties," Hotch asked.

"A... train."

"Symtex and C-4," Morgan asked.

"Yup."

"Are trains still arriving at Union Station," I looked over at Strauss.

"Yes, but only the authorities are allowed in."

"They have Will and a government vehicle," I pointed out.

The team loaded into the S.U.Vs and took off toward Union Station. The place was already surrounded and being evacuated when we showed up.

It was still chaotic when we got inside and tried to find Matthew Downs and Will.

Morgan's voice rang in my ear that he saw the suspect going toward the East exit. I looked around for Emily as I started heading that way. I had no idea where she was.

"I found Will," was the next message that came through on the earpiece. I sighed and took off in Morgan's direction.

"Is he mobile," Hotch asked.

"Negative," she replied. "He's got six transmitters on him and this whole place is gonna blow."

I almost froze.

"Where are you, I'm heading that way," Hotch said.

"No, you gotta get everyone out," Emily insisted. "Is the bomb squad here yet?"

"They're three minutes away."

"Copy."

After that, the radio went quiet. I tried to keep myself focused on helping Morgan, but I could already feel the worry eating at my stomach. I felt like I should go back. Get Emily the hell out of there.

No. No. Morgan needed me here. I needed to help him.

I watched Morgan drag Matthew off the fence before Matthew slammed him against it.

I pulled my gun, planning to just threaten the guy until he turned and slammed Morgan against a dumpster next to them. I fired a shot a few moments after that and waited until Matthew had fallen to the ground before I lowered my weapon.

"You alright," I asked Morgan. He nodded, touching his throat. "Come on."

Morgan and I were just rounding the corner when I saw Emily, Will, and Hotch making their way out. I took off running.

"Emily!"

She looked over as soon as I yelled. She was about to say something, but I pulled her into a hug before she could. She slowly hugged me back, I felt her hide her face in my shoulder.

My chest hurt.

Even after the anxiety and panic had faded, I was in pain after everything had happened. I was tired. I needed to correct things. Stop wasting time.

I leaned back a bit. Just far enough to look at her.

And it was definitely more impulsive than I would've liked, but I kissed her.

The whole thing lasted a matter of seconds before I seemed to snap back to my senses and leaned away again.

"I... I'm sorry," I shook my head. "That was... I shouldn't-"

"It's okay," she stopped me.

"Really?"

She nodded before leaning in and kissing me again. I kept thinking about how much I had missed this before. I tried to pull her closer to me, even though that wasn't really possible.

She leaned back first this time.

"I really missed that," I mumbled, my eyes still shut as my forehead touched hers.

"So did I," she said before grabbing my hand. "Come on, we gotta go."

I nodded, letting our fingers intertwine.

As we walked away from the station, my phone started ringing. It was Sam on the other line.

"Hey, finally, what happened-"

"Dean's gone."

"What," I asked, stopping where I was. Emily looked back at me.

"He... He killed Dick and now Dean and Cas are just gone. I have no idea where they are, and Crowley won't tell me and he got Kevin-"

I felt like I just went numb for a few moments. When I looked at Emily, I seemed to snap into focus again.

"Alright, alright, Sam," I cut off his rambling. "I... I'm at a crime scene. I'm going to head home and call you back. I need you to get out of wherever the fuck you are and wait for me to call, got it?"

"Okay."

"We'll figure this out, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, alright."

"Now, go."

I ended the call before walking over to Hotch. I muttered something to him about a family emergency and he told me to just go. Emily followed me.

"What happened," she asked as we made it to one of the S.U.Vs.

"That really dangerous hunt that I mentioned?" I said. "It went wrong."

"What?"

"Something happened to Dean and Cas."

"I thought Cas was dead."

"Oh, shit, I have a lot to fill you in on," I muttered. I ran my hands over my face.

"Hey," she grabbed one of my hands. "It's gonna be fine. One step at a time."

I nodded before going to start the car.

One step at a time.

I could handle that.

Hopefully.

---------------------------

Hey! I did a rewrite of the ending of Supernatural. It took a really long time to complete, so it would mean a lot to me if you check it out. Here’s a link! (it’s on my personal account)

---------------------------

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[forthechubbies]

The Lost Korean Soldier Vol. 3

Hello Stranger

A woman stumbles upon an unconscious man in a park, and her life jumps from ordinary to extraordinary!

Jeongukk x Chubby! Reader

Gaslighting, Strong Language, and JK being adorable

Korean

LKS Vol. 2

My Teddies ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ @mwitsmejk @lolalee24 @mcusuperfreak @imbirdiez @sereisstuff @agustdboyoongie @97cityy @mochiarcher @toughbook @chubbyanarkiss @omgsuperstarg @jiminie-08

“Dong Yeon”

He looks just as yummy as the day he left...Oh, right, he left you. You pulled away from his strong arms and attempted to play it cool.

“Farwell.” You wasted your breath on a goodbye that wasn't coming anytime soon. He didn't want you to leave.

He held you back by your forearm. “Please wait- I know you still hate me, but I worry about you and want to know if you're doing okay.”

It’s odd how a small sentence can cause a mental breakdown.

You jerk your arm out of his grip. “Worried!?” You caught yourself and took in a deep breath before exhaling. “ I'm great, Dong Yeon. How is your millionaire business doing?”

He ignored your passive aggression. “It's been over two years, and that's all you have to say to me....after disappearing off the face of the earth.”

“Listen, Ding Dong; Unlike most people, I'm a big important Ceo which means if I'm late for work. I'm getting fired, so I'm going to leave now. Bye.”

Your heels clicked as you walked.

“Woah!” You heard him in disbelief. “You are so childish.”

It looks like your going to have to call out sick. “ I'm childish!” You made your way to his face.

“Yea! Who else would I be talking about?!”

“ How am I childish?! When you are the one who abandoned me and then tried to play the victim when I don't want anything to do with you.”

He grew silent. You watched his Adam apple jump.

“I don't have time for this- between you and Jeongukk, I'm bound to go bald.”

“Jeongukk?”

“Bye, Dong Yeon.” You finally took your leave.

Forty minutes after you get chewed out by your boss.

A ruckus blasted from the first floor catching the attention of your most nosiest coworkers.

“Let him in.” They cheered from your floor. “He's so pretty.”

“ I know.”

The guard sighed in distress. “ Ladies, please-...Sir, I can't let you in.”

“ I heard you the first time, but the thing is, I'm not fond of being told what to do soo.” He sprang over the vital card gate. “ Peachy!”

You gasped at his voice. “ Is he crazy?” You jumped from your chair, joining the crowd. You were a hairline away from breaking your neck how fast you ran to Jeongukk's aid.

“Peachy!” He smiled, rushing behind you. “ Tell him to get lost!”

You calmly explained to the guard that Jeongukk was sick in the head. “I'm so sorry for causing you trouble.”

“What is he to you?” He furrowed his brows. An expression Jeongukk mirrored.

“Boyfriend!” Jeongukk shouted in broken English.

“You have a death wish?” You turned to Jeongukk for a split second.

He giggled as a response and even went the extra mile to wrap his arms around your waist.

......

Apparently, You weren't aware it was your children to workday because this is how it feels.

At 2:00 pm sharp, it's quitting time. The stress of working and keeping Jeongukk out of trouble takes a toll on your body. You sighed, desiring a hot bath and a nap.

“My feet are killing me.” You huffed.

You squeaked at being carried suddenly. “Put me down.”

Jeongukk hushed you, pressing your head against his chest. “Take a nap until we get home.”

The sound of Jeongukk's soft heartbeat was a lullaby; unable to overthrow your heavy eyelids; you fell into a deep sleep.

When you woke up, instead of being at home, you were instructed to another handsome gentleman who claims to know Jeongukk.

“Kim.Taehyung!” The man patted his chest. “We've been friends for years. How could you say you don't know me?!”

[hotchley]

the green light of forgiveness

FIRST MENTALIST FIC WHOO!

Hi?

This is my first fic since March. Since then a lot of life has happened (as I'm sure you're all aware.)So my writing is a little rusty. And I've never written for The Mentalist so I don't really think I characterised anyone properly, but oh well. I basically watched Red John today and I kept waiting for someone to say something about Lisbon (the moral dilemma about Red John) was so interesting. So because I didn't get my line about Lisbon, we are now here.

I haven't actually watched the episode after. I got carried away. Anyways, I've been AWOL for ages so the writing is… questionable and hasn't been proofread (like always) and I will probably go AWOL with fics again, because I'm trying to keep this fun! So yeah! Title is from happiness- Taylor Swift. It's the best song off evermore and you can't change my mind /j

Let me know if I missed any TWs, it's 12:30am and I spent my morning talking to ten different children about multiple books and I am tired.

read on ao3!

All you want from me now is the green light of forgiveness You haven't met the new me yet And I think she'll give you that

Thomas McAllister is grinning at Patrick Jane.

He can't stand it. How dare he. How dare this pathetic coward, who murdered an innocent woman and child and hundreds of other people, grin at him? He isn't smart. He hasn't won. He is just a man, who has fears and weaknesses. Now that his identity has been revealed, there are no cards left for him to play.

Jane knows he is a wanted man, but there is a dead body lying two feet away from him and he didn't put the bullet there. It will be selfish and unfair, but if he escapes, he can get to Lisbon and the rest of his family. He can get them out of whatever situation they are in. Because he knows something has happened to them. It's the same prickling feeling he used to get when Angela gave Charlotte a bit too much sugar before bed since she wanted to say goodnight to him, or when Charlotte accidentally spilt glitter on one of his jackets.

The point is, he is a wanted man, but Red John is desired. The FBI will let him and the rest of the team go if he leads them to their worst enemy, especially now the public is so aware of his existence. He has learnt, that for better or for worse, they will do anything to protect their image. And if that means letting him go because the public perceive him as a grieving man that simply wants closure, they'll do it.

Which means McAllister shouldn't be grinning.

"You shouldn't do it," he says, as though it's simply a conversation about a haircut.

"Shouldn't do what?" Jane asks through gritted teeth.

Red John has seen his full range of emotions without him ever intending to showcase any of them. Red John is his nemesis. Red John is the monster under his bed, the figure he sees out of the corner of his eye when he feels paranoid. Red John is undefeatable.

But Sheriff McAllister is a man who is afraid of death as all people are. Even Jane is afraid of dying. There are so many things he hasn't done. So many words he hasn't said. He hasn't told Charlotte that there's nothing to be afraid of anymore. Hasn't told Angela that he found peace. He needs to tell Cho that he's brave, tell Rigsby that he's going to be a good father, tell Grace that she must never lose that childish hope.

He needs to tell Teresa more things than is humanly possible. He needs to say sorry. That he's proud of her. That she is the most beautiful woman he has ever known. That she needs to loosen up. That he can't afford to lose her and that's why he always runs and leaves her behind. That he loves her.

So whatever reason he's about to be given for keeping him alive is going to be born out of self-preservation and it will be easy to rationalise it into something that means he can pull the trigger. But more than pulling the trigger, he wants his hands to end his life. He wants to watch as that pathetic man starts pleading, wants to make him as helpless as every other victim, wants to witness the light leave his eyes and the panic and realisation set in-

"Teresa won't ever forgive you if you do," McAllister taunts. 

Just for a moment, his hand falters. But then he thinks of her. The real Teresa Lisbon who loves with patience and laughs at his awful jokes and never rolls her eyes at the team with any emotion other than humour. He thinks of the Teresa Lisbon he loves, not the woman that has hidden her personality from so many people for her safety. 

It’s why his voice doesn’t waver when he speaks.

"You're wrong."

"Oh?"

"Agent Lisbon will find it difficult to reconcile the image of me with blood on my hands with the gun-fearing man I appear to be on many of our cases. She will understand that I likely acted in self defence and will eventually come to terms with what I was forced to do."

"And are Agent Lisbon and your sweet, darling Teresa two different people? She wears a wonderful perfume, I'll have to find out what it's called. And she looks so peaceful when she's unconscious. Likely because she isn't burdened with your shenanigans."

The image of Lisbon, breathing and seemingly relaxed, but Partridge’s blood on her face as she became another on a long list of Red John’s victims comes to the forefront of his mind. He made a vow that day. Never again was he going to wipe the blood off someone he loved because of something he had done. It made him even more determined to find Red John. Because nobody should hold the power to make Lisbon vulnerable unless she had already given it to them.

He had abused that power once. To make her annoyed, so she wouldn’t question where her birthday gift was. He hadn’t expected her to hurt, and the look she had given him- one of pure disgust, as though she had always believed she would be immune to his barbs- had stung more than he’d ever admit to anyone.

“Teresa is simply a woman who is a human. She’ll forgive me in the blink of an eye because she cares about me. And when she cares, she forgives. In fact, she’ll be grateful that I killed you. You abused so many people. You have used them and you have ruined lives and you do not deserve a jury or a trial. She believes in forgiveness. Lord only knows how many times she forgave her father and brothers in order to move on with her life.  She cares for me, and she knows this is the only ending to the story. Whilst she may not want to accept it, she will.”

“She loves you.”

“She loves many people.” He can’t afford to give into this game. Not now he is so close. 

“She loves you more. And I know you love her also. I wondered what you would do when you found out I hurt her. I was disappointed in your reaction. I was hoping for a more romantic gesture. Perhaps a declaration of love, given that you won’t ever get the chance again.” 

“I will. And she knows. This is your downfall.”

“My love for love? Now, now, Patrick, let’s not be silly.”

“Your desire for theatrics. It makes you blind.” He only has a few moments to work with.

“Does it?” There is the cockiness he has needed.

“I need to show you something,” he says, and when McAllister smirks and leans forward, he acts.

The gunshot sounds unnaturally loud. Everything else happens too fast for him to process. All he can think of is the last time Charlotte smiled at him and the last kiss Angela blew him. Tom McAllister, not Bertram, not Red John, took them and so many others. It’s only right that he joins them.

He does doubt whether or not Lisbon will truly forgive him, but he can hardly focus on that when he’s so close to revenge.

He gets it. McAllister begs as much as he’s able to, and then it’s over. It feels shockingly anticlimactic, but he supposes he should’ve been prepared for that. After Lisbon finally arrested Walter Mashburn, she came and sat with him. And when he asked how it felt, she shrugged and said it was just another closed case.

He wonders if the feelings will kick in later.

He knows he needs to leave.

So he does.

In his first letter to Lisbon- he rewrites it several times, knowing that she’ll know but quite frankly not caring enough to send the first copy because there is too much and it is too soon- he details exactly what he did.

He sends four more letters with zero reference to the events that led to this method of communication. Because if nothing had happened, he would’ve been sauntering into whatever office she had and saying whatever he wanted regardless of who was there. He sends four more with zero reference because Teresa sent five with no acknowledgement beyond thank you.

Six months later, at the same time that she starts a new job, she sends a letter. It deviates from their usual pattern. 

He fears the worst as he opens the letter. He won’t go back unless he has to. He wanted that “has to” to be something like Cho’s wedding or because Grace and Wayne are expecting, but if Lisbon is writing early it’s unlikely it’s something good.

 But the letter is blank save for three words.

I forgive you.

He breaks down there. He clings to the letter as his legs give out and tears stream down his face because she forgives him. She forgives him, and even though he knows he had nothing to apologise for and that she would always grant him this, to see the words written in her own handwriting is like a weight lifted off his chest.

If Teresa can forgive him, then he will be okay. Because yes, Teresa is a forgiving person, but he hurt her again by running away. At some point, her mercy was going to run out. He assumed it would run out when he tried to bury a man alive because that almost jeopardised her career, and when she still let him use her for his vendetta, he knew he needed to be careful.

Teresa’s forgiveness feels much like her love. He doesn’t want to think about that. He wants to think about how beautiful she is. How much she’s changed, for better or for worse. Because the Agent Lisbon that let him look at the files wouldn’t have dreamed of letting him near Red John. The Agent Lisbon that still writes him letters despite saying she can’t has forgiven him for killing.

The first time she sees him, she flinches.

Patrick wants to make her hurt. He wants to shout at her. How dare she say she’s forgiven him if she’s going to look at him like he’s not her friend?

But then he thinks about it for half a second longer. She flinched because she was afraid of what she’d done to him. She was terrified that it was seeing how many criminals they caught walk free for one reason or another that drove him to the edge of a cliff you couldn’t come back from. She thought it was her fault he’d dived off it with no regard for the landing.

He wanted to say he’d desired revenge long before she ever said hello to him, and that she had remained his one tie to the world. That he’d started living- not just surviving- because she looked at him without pity and without sorrow. He wanted to say that he didn’t feel like there was any more blood on his hands because they’d done what they could.

But all those words died when she looked at him with those wide eyes and that slightly hesitant smile since she’d had a moment to compose herself.

So he said the words that said all of that and more. And he did the thing that proved he wasn’t lying.

“Lisbon,” he whispers, and then he embraces her with all the love he still holds for Angela and Charlotte, as well as all the love he’s grown to hold for her. 

She smiles, and in some strange way, she feels forgiven too. Perhaps it’s for waiting so long to write the first letter. Perhaps it’s for something she can’t remember she felt guilty about because Jane is back and she’s in his arms and he feels like home.

“Jane,” she replies, the same teasing lilt emerging.

And he knows then. It’s definite. It’s certain. There are now five indisputable facts for when he can’t sleep.

One: Lisbon loves him. Two:  they’re back together to solve cases and tease each other. Three: forgiveness is possible, even for people like him. Four: he can keep his vow.  And five: he is home, and it is filled with a brightness he has never seen before. 

[monsterrae1]

*tiptoes in* "Everyone is already thinking that we're dating" *scurries out*

Oh love this one, I'll give it my best and hope you like it!

*

"Dispatch to Station 118"

"Go a head dispatch" Eddie smiled a little, hearing Bobby's voice, even if it was over the coms felt familiar in a nice way.

"You're needed as back up on a fire on..." Eddie looked at his screen and repeated the address to them "the 136 is already there commanding the scene"

"Copy that Dispatcher Diaz, we're on our way"

Eddie took a deep breath nodded, it was his first day, he really didn't want to screw up.

"Dispatcher Diaz?" A familiar voice said, Eddie left his smile grow on his face.

"Go ahead Firefighter Buckley"

"Good luck on your first day, you got this"

"Thanks Buck"

-

"Firefighter Buckley, second door to your right, you should find a tool box there, see if you can use anything" Eddie said into the coms, hearing as Buck moved through the house following his instructions.

"Found it, hey Eds, now that you're here, I was thinking we could do the zoo this weekend? To celebrate Chris' report card" Eddie smiled, biting his lip.

"Not really the time Buck"

"Well, you didn't answer my text"

"The zoo sounds great, just remember we need to be at my abuelas for dinner"

"Boys? You can't to this at another time?"

"Sorry Bobby" They both answered and focused back on the emergency at hand.

-

"Evan Buckley I swear to God if you don't answer me right now..." The chair hit the cubicle behind Eddie as he stood up, eyes watching all the monitors and waiting for an update on Buck, who had gone back into an unstable building because he heard something, and now he wasn't answering his radio "Buck, c'mon, what am I gonna tell Chris" He said softly, ignoring the wetness pooling on his eyes.

Another 5 long minutes later, the radio came on, Buck telling them to prepare for transport of an open fracture and several third degree burns, Eddie focused back on his job and dispatched an extra unit for the transport, and taking a deep breath when the line went dead just as the entire time focused on the last victim.

After that call Eddie took 5. He made sure to text Buck to check in that he came out of that building fine himself, and also texting Hen to update him with any information Buck was gonna leave out of his typical "I'm doing fine Eds, just doing my job". He looked at his watch and sighted, 3 more hours until he could go home.

"You know" One of the others dispatchers said walking into the break room with him "We weren't sure why you transferred here, guess now we know"

"What you mean?" Eddie frowned, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Your boyfriend? Firefighter Buckley? We figured they made one of you transfer and you took one for the team"

"Oh" Eddie blushed a little "He's not... we're not..." Married? Together? "It's a little complicated" He finally settled on, they weren't together, but they were sort of raising a kid together, and they weren't married but they were family.

"Shit, sorry"

"No worries"

The rest of the shift went by with less tension, both Hen and Buck assured him that Buck was alright, aside from a few bruises, so he could relax. On his way back to his house he started to think about his conversation on the break room, the implication that everyone thought he and Buck were together, a lot of comments started to make sense.

In the 4 months he'd been at Metro Dispatch Eddie had been invited to a few cookouts and drinks after shifts, when he'd politely declined, he was told he was welcome to bring his family along, and he never gave it much of a thought about how they had pulled Buck in the family box, because that's what he was, but now thinking about it it made more sense for them to think that they were together, instead of just being weirdly attached best friends.

The jeep was parked outside of his house when he finally made it, Chris was probably already sleep, even by the time Buck arrived, but the lights were on in the kitchen and there was a shadow moving through the place, Eddie smiled and took his bag to finally make his way in.

"You know" He said walking into the kitchen, letting his eyes watch Buck and catalogue the visible bruises on his skin "Everyone at dispatch already thinks we're dating" He watched as Buck froze in place, nearly dropping the plates he was taking out of the cupboard

In a moment of bravery, he closed the distance between them, standing right behind Buck and caging his body in between his arms, taking the plates out of his hand and placing them in the counter, when Buck tried to move, Eddie took a step back, in case he wanted to leave, but Buck only turned around to face him, dropping his hands into Eddie's hips.

"Yeah?"

"Hmm" Eddie hummed, closing the space between them again, chest to chest, almost nose to nose "So, why aren't we?"

"You think you're ready for that?"

Eddie took a moment to think about it, he'd been working on a lot of stuff on therapy, one of them being able to accept the things he wanted for himself

"I do, you?"

A huge smile took over Buck's face, in a second moving his hands from Eddie's hips to cup his face gently.

"Just waiting for you eds"

Eddie smiled and finally, closed the space between them with a soft kiss.

[cayleyshortstories]

Lucid

Written by Janry Deoduco & Illustrated by Kiefer Tayawa

They say that family is the only joy you’ll ever need in life, and if there would be a perfect embodiment of that, the Santiago Family would be a good candidate. On a peaceful evening, the Santiagos decided to play a game of Monopoly as they waited for their pizza dinner--just like any normal happy family. “You landed on my property, Dad! Where’s my 200?” said the Santiagos’ only child, Lucy, lightly bossing her father out. “Okay, fine! But…” replied Daniel, “aha!” He exclaimed as he threw a card down looking very proud of himself. ‘Once you land on your opponent’s property, the fee will revert to the owner,’ the card said. “Come on, Dad!” dismayed, Lucy fell to a defeated kneel as she handed the 200 creds she owed her father. After a while, the doorbell interrupted their heated, exciting match of Monopoly. “Oh, finally! That must be the food,” almost jumping out of her seat, Daniel’s wife, Sandra Marie hurried towards the door to pay. The two left at the coffee table right in the middle of their living room looked relieved, both from the heat of the game and their rumbling stomachs. “Here, babe,” Sandra handed Lucy a slice of her favorite shrimp pizza from her favorite pizza place, Maximus’ Pizza. The child thanked her and retreated happily back to the coffee table, analyzing the board as if it were a chess match.

The night started with a warm and comforting vibe, but as it grew past its youth, an eerie gust of wind blew leaves from trees, as if devouring the harmony and peace the young night gave its inhabitants.

“Lucy! Time for bed baby girl,” said Sandra. Their game of Monopoly ended with Daniel losing. It had been a weekly tradition for the Santiagos, as they played Monopoly in their living room and ordered the same pizza from the same place at exactly 7:00 in the evening every Sunday. “Already? I’m not yet sleepy, Mom.” Lucy replied, though her tired eyes and relaxed gestures seemed to contradict that. “Did you forget? We’re going to the park tomorrow,” Sandra said as she carried the sleepy Lucy from the living room floor and started walking up a few steps. “Really? Yehey! Well, I guess it’s time for bed, Dumdum,” the young girl said to her stuffed animal, gently resting her head on her mother’s shoulder. As the night grew out of its youth, the cryptic whistles of the wind blew harder, that even the tree branches outside the Santiagos’ home lightly tapped onto their windows, almost as if the elements outside were luring them out. Though the circumstances did not stop the three from their slumber, something else seemed to stop Daniel’s.

He heard and saw people screaming and being tortured, and then he screamed of fear until he awoke at 3:07 am and walked downstairs to get a drink of cold water. After that, huge lightning flashes, and a strong wind blows while he felt something strange crawling on his body but couldn’t find out what it really is. Suddenly, he touches his body because of his weird feeling and then he finally notices that he can see everything differently. He noticed that something looked upside-down and the places started to change and change due to an unexplained situation so he finally realized that something weird was happening. He is questioning himself “Am I seeing these things normally?” “Are these things the things I saw yesterday?”

People being tortured, bloody scenes of utter violence, and complete chaos appeared in Daniel’s vision as he came slowly into a distorted state of consciousness. At the sight of these, he screamed and wailed, completely overwhelmed and terrified at the same time. Daniel tried to walk away, but his feet seemed to be glued onto the floor. A beastly being suddenly roared and broke from inside the ground to the surface, adding to the raging fear and panic Daniel was experiencing. “Help! Get me out of here, I can’t move!” He screamed repeatedly until he could barely speak. After all that took place, the hell he woke up to disappeared as if a switch had activated it. Shocked, he felt for his own skin, somehow examining the reality he’s in.

After so many questions that came to his mind, he finally realized that he was still dreaming and was thinking of everything that can make his house back to normal. “Oh my! I can control everything. What if I think of something interesting. How about some new shoes hmm. It worked!” He is finally getting interested in his dream called the Lucid Dream. “Dad, what are you doing late at night?” Lucy said while going downstairs. “Oh, you’re awake! I think Lucy will love this. Hey Lucy, come. Here’s your new plush toy.” “Wow! Dad, you have some awesome and cool superpowers.” Lucy ran upstairs and called Sandra to show Daniel’s new unexplained power. “Mom! Wake up, look at Dad, he is a superhero.” “What is it my darling?” said Sandra. “I was a masked magician and will give you some lovely roses. Give some three claps and the roses are yours.” Sandra clapped three times and then she suddenly noticed that she was already holding sweet-scented roses. “Unbelievable Daniel! I think this is very interesting.” said Sandra while smelling Daniel’s lovely roses. “Let’s see what more can I do.” Daniel thought of a big mansion. “Wow! My dreams came true. Can I fly?” Daniel started to fly together with his family having their fun while laughing. “Gimme a cape and a talking DUMDUM Dad!” Daniel gives all he can give to fulfill his family’s dream. After they enjoyed their fun Moments together, they started to rest while Daniel saw a huge dusty mirror and wiped it with his own hands. He saw nothing until he heard a huge scream from his family. Lucy is screaming of fear while Sandra is crying and then he saw the mirror again and suddenly saw a reflection of himself as an old man staring at him. “WAKE UP!!!” said the old man and suddenly pulled him inside the mirror. He lost his consciousness for a minute until he woke up in a blank space with a strange atmosphere and said, “Where am I?! Why did you bring me to this kind of worthless place?” He tried to run fast because he thought it was the only way to escape but nothing happened. He is like running out of nowhere and hoping for nothing. He tried to close his eyes but nothing new happened. It was like closing his eyes, but his eyes won’t really close. After a second, he stopped for a bit and heard some whispering uncleared voices and he said, “Who are you?” Different kinds of voices started to shout at him with random languages until it became so annoying and made Daniel suffer. “Stop! Why can't I control this thing?” said Daniel. The noise started to grow and grow until he finally heard his family screaming and crying of fear. “Dad! Help us! Please look for us. We’re scared Dad.” said Lucy while Sandra said, “Daniel, do something! Stop this kind of suffering!” After that, the whole place started to burn and Daniel heard all the suffering of every person he encountered. “IT HURTS!” said the woman. Daniel said, “Why can't I feel anything? Why can’t I do something about it?” After minutes of suffering, flashes of people suffering from torture went to Daniel's eyes. “Stop it! Don’t hurt us! We’re innocent people. We don’t deserve this kind of thing.” Daniel suddenly looked at the man crying until it looked at him with reddish creepy eyes and said, “It’s your fault! STOP THINKING ABOUT US!!!” “But I can’t control myself! I don’t know why but I can’t stop thinking about all of this.” The crying man started to move his feet up and tried to stab him; however, he suddenly pushed the guy very hard and felt the anger crawling at his back. “I can’t control my emotions! AM I CRAZY?! Is this really a Lucid Dream wherein I can make things I want to become a reality? Why do I can’t control myself thinking of this kind of image over and over? I just wanted to play with my family and have fun together seeing my daughter and wife’s smiles. I want to go back to our past wherein we are spending our time playing Monopoly and eating pizza together. I missed the time wherein I can kiss my wife over and over again like there is no tomorrow. I want to go back. I just wanted to get them back!”

“I missed them. I love them. I cared for them. Give me back my family...” The nurses were shocked and started looking at a 95-year-old guy who has suffered from critical mental illness complications for the past many years. He is one of those innocent victims who survived in a War whose families are tortured and killed by those heartless foreign soldiers. He suffered from a deep trauma since the death of his family which makes him unconscious and dream of his memorable pasts. “It is the first time that Mr. Santiago talked like that.” “I think It is a miracle for him to speak.“ “Wait, let me talk to him.” said the nurse while looking at Daniel cautiously. “What is it, sir? May we help you?” said the nurse. Daniel looked at the nurse directly into their eyes for the first time and said, “Sandra? Lucy? I finally realized that you’re all fine now.” He laughed quietly until he passed out smiling since he finally realized that the true peace in life is to accept reality and let go of the past.

____________________________________________________

ILLUSTRATION EXPLANATION:

The whole theme of the short story is about lucid dreaming and love for family. In this still image, the eyes directly looking at the family represent Daniel’s love for his family. The mood of this still image looks dreamy and dark, yet full of colors because it is about lucid dreaming in general which is very pensive. Ever since Daniel lost his family, he can never forget about the memories he and his family have shared, and that caused Daniel to reminisce it over and over again.

[babygirlkiki1016]

The Hunt Begins

When we got to Stanford Dean told me just to wait outside by the Impala. About twenty minutes later I hear voices coming from the building. I see Dean take a glance at me to see if I was still there. Sam was saying something but Dean just rolls his eyes.

"The weapon training, and melting the silver into bullets? Man, Dean, we were raised like warriors." I heard Sam say as they cross the parking lot to the Impala.

"So what are you gonna do? You're just gonna live some normal, apple pie life? Is that it?" Dean growls.

"No. Not normal. Safe." 

"And that's why you ran away." Dean looks away.

"I was just going to college. It was Dad who said if I was gonna go I should stay gone. And that's what I'm doing."

"Yeah, well, Dad's in real trouble right now. If he's not dead already. I can feel it." Sam is silent.

"I can't do this alone."

"Yes you can." I joke, making both of the boys look at me. 

"Yeah, well, as Y/n pointed out earlier which you weren't here for, I don't want to."

"Wait, that's Y/n? Y/D/N's kid?" Sam asked surprised. "You brought his kid here?! Do you know what he's going to do to us when he realizes she's missing!?"

"Uh I believe he already knows." I interrupt.

"Look, she wanted to come so I didn't stop her besides she's eighteen." Dean points out. Sam sighs and looks down, thinking, then up.

"What was he hunting?" Sam asked as Dean opens the trunk of the Impala, then the spare-tire compartment, it's an arsenal.

"Holy crap this is cool!" I exclaimed as Dean props the compartment open with a shotgun and digs through the clutter.

"I know right? All right, let's see, where the hell did I put that thing?"

"So when Dad left, why didn't you go with him?" Sam asks.

"I was working my own gig. This, uh, voodoo thing, down in New Orleans."

"Dad let you go on a hunting trip by yourself?" Dean looks over at Sam.

"I'm twenty-six, dude."

"And then you went to Y/D/N for help?"

"That's about right, she offered to help cause her father wouldn't." Dean pulls some papers out of a folder. "All right, here we go. So Dad was checking out this two-lane blacktop just outside of Jericho, California. About a month ago, this guy." Dean hands one of the papers to Sam, I look over his shoulder to see. "They found his car, but he vanished. Completely MIA. The paper is a printout of an article from the Jericho Herald, headlined Centennial Highway Disappearance and dated Sept. 19th 2005; it has a man's picture, captioned Andrew Carey MISSING." Sam reads it and glances up.

"So maybe he was kidnapped."

"Yeah. Well, here's another one in April." Dean hands me a Jericho Herald article for each date he mentions. "Another one in December 'oh-four, 'oh-three, 'ninety-eight, 'ninety-two, ten of them over the past twenty years." Dean takes the article's back from us and picks up the rest of the stack, putting them back in the folder. "All men, all the Same five-mile stretch of road." Dean pulls a bag out of another part of the arsenal. "It started happening more and more, so Dad went to go dig around. That was about three weeks ago. I hadn't heard from him since, which is bad enough." He grabs a handheld tape recorder. "Then I get this voicemail yesterday." He presses play, the recording is staticky and the signal was clearly breaking up.

"Dean...something big is starting to happen...I need to try and figure out what's going on. It may... Be very careful, Dean. We're all in danger...and if you can...Y/D/N's kid." Dean presses stop.

"Wait...he mentioned me." I say silently.

"What does dad want with Y/n?" Sam asks.

"I don't know that's why I went to your dad. So whatever is going on, obviously your part of it."

"Well other than the creepy message involving me, you know there's EVP on that?" I said.

"Not bad, Y/n. Kinda like riding a bike, isn't it?" Sam shakes his head. "All right. I slowed the message down, I ran it through a gold wave, took out the hiss, and this is what I got." He presses play again.

"I can never go home..." Was the voice that was heard, Dean presses stop.

"Never go home." Sam comments, trying to think what it could mean. Dean drops the recorder, puts down the shotgun, stands straight, and shuts the trunk, then leans on it. "You know, in almost two years I've never bothered you, never asked you for a thing." Sam looks away and sighs, then looks back. "All right. I'll go. I'll help you find him." Sam submits, Dean nods. "But I have to get back first thing Monday. Just wait here." Sam turns to go back to the apartment but turns back when Dean speaks.

"What's first thing Monday?" 

"I have this...I have an interview."

"What, a job interview? Skip it."

"It's a law school interview, and it's my whole future on a plate."

"Law school?" Dean smirks.

"So we got a deal or not?" Dean says nothing, Sam turns back around and heads back into the building.

"Your brother is certainly...not happy." I look over at Dean who shrugs.

"Eh he'll get over it." Dean smirks and gets back in the car, Dean maybe be smiling but I have a bad feeling about this.

~

Dean comes out of the convenience mart carrying junk food. Sam is sitting in the shotgun seat with the door open, rifling through a box of tapes as I was sitting in the back with the window down. I don't know what he's looking for but it must be important.

"Hey!" Dean says with a smile on his face. Sam leans out and looks at him. "You want breakfast?"

"No, thanks."

"Y/n? I got you coffee, along with some biscuits." He hands me the food.

"Thanks...." I say and take the food from him. "So how'd you pay for that stuff?" Sam  asks. "You and Dad still running credit card scams?" 

"Yeah, well, hunting ain't exactly a pro ball career." Dean puts the nozzle that he left running while he went inside back on the pump. "Besides, all we do is apply. It's not our fault they send us the cards."

"Yeah? And what names did you write on the application this time?" Sam swings his legs back inside the car and closes the door.

"Uh, Burt Aframian." Dean gets into the driver seat and puts his soda and chips down.

"And his son Hector. Scored two cards out of the deal."

"That's pretty smart, man I wish I thought of that. Then I wouldn't have had to get a job." I joke as Dean closes the door, Sam looks back at me then at Dean.

"Only a few days and your already a bad influence on her." Sam chuckles. "I swear, man, you've gotta update your cassette tape collection." From what I could see there are at least a dozen cassettes in the box on Sam's lap; some have album art, others are hand-labeled.

"Why?" Dean asked.

"Well, for one, they're cassette tapes. And two." Sam holds up a tape for every band he names. "Black Sabbath? Motorhead? Metallica?" Dean takes the box labeled Metallica from Sam. "It's the greatest hits of mullet rock."

"And that's probably why he has them." I interrupt while sipping my coffee.

"Well, house rules, Sammy." Dean pops the tape in the player. "Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole." Dean drops the Metallica box back in the box of tapes and starts the engine.

"Wait." Sammy looks back at me as Dean drives off. "Why does she get coffee?"

"Well I asked her what she wanted and she told me."

"You didn't ask me...."

"Suck it up Sammy." Sam made a pouty face, I look down at my coffee then back at him. I reach forward and politely offer him some which Dean notices.

"Aw look at that she's willing to share."

"Shut up." Sam said with a blush on his face as he slowly took my cup.

~

   Sam is talking on his cell phone. "Thank you." He says then closes his phone. "All right. So, there's no one matching Dad at the hospital or morgue."

"Well at least we know he's ok." I said, making Sam nod in agreement.

"That's something, I guess." Dean glances over at us, then back at the road. At a bridge ahead of them, there are two police cars and several officers. 

"Woah, I wonder what happened." I wondered as Sam leans forward for a closer look, Dean pulls over. We take a long look before Dean turns off the engine. Dean opens the glove compartment and pulls out a box full of ID cards with his and John's faces. Visible ones include FBI and DEA. He picks one out and grins at Sam, who stares.

"Let's go."  Dean gets out of the car and me and Sam follow pursuit. On the bridge, the lead Deputy, leans over the railing to yell down to two men in wetsuits who were poking around the river.

"You guys find anything?" He yells.

"No! Nothing!" The other man who was below us replied. The deputy turns back to the car in the middle of the bridge. Another Deputy, is at the driver's side looking around inside the car. The three of us walk into the crime scene, I felt out of place but the brothers acted like they belong there.

"You fellas had another one like this just last month, didn't you?" Dean asks as the first Deputy looks up when he starts talking and straightens up to talk to him.

"And who are you?" Dean flashes his badge. "Federal marshals."

"You three are a little young for marshals, aren't you? Especially the girl." Dean laughs. "Thanks, that's awfully kind of you." Dean goes over to the car. "You did have another one just like this, correct?"

"Yeah, that's right. About a mile up the road. There've been others before that."

"So, this victim, you knew him?" Sam questioned, Jaffe, as it says on his name tag, nods.

"Town like this, everybody knows everybody." Dean circles the car, looking around.

"...And that is why I hate small towns." I state. "Any connection between the victims, besides that they're all men?"

"Uh N-No. Not so far as we can uh tell."

"So what's the theory? I'm thinking insane hitchhiker." Sam goes over to Dean as I keep the deputy busy.

"Honestly, we don't know. Serial murder? Kidnapping ring?"

"Well, that is exactly the kind of crack police work I'd expect out of you guys." Dean insults, Sam stomps on his foot.

"Thank you for your time." I say and the three of us head back to the Impala. Jaffe watches us go but I could the two talking.

"She's a pretty one ain't she?" Jaffe mentions, I ignored him, pervert I thought. Dean smacks Sam on the head, catching my attention.

"Ow! What was that for?" Sam grumbled.

"Why'd you have to step on my foot?"

"Why do you have to talk to the police like that?" Dean looks at Sam and moves in front of him, forcing Sam to stop walking.

"Come on. They don't really know what's going on. We're all alone on this. I mean, if we're going to find Dad we've got to get to the bottom of this thing ourselves." Sam clears his throat and looks over Dean's shoulder. Dean turns to see a Sheriff and two FBI agents.

"Can I help you boys?" The sheriff asks.

"No, sir, we were just leaving." I smile at them, giving them some reassurance and walk past the three men. Dean and Sam head past the Sheriff, who turns to watch us go.

~

Later we decided to go talk to this young woman, the second deputy's daughter I believe. As we walk up the street the marquee on the Highland Movie Theater reads in big bold letters: EMERGENCY TOWN HALL MEETING SUNDAY 8 PM BE SAFE OUT THERE. Below that a young woman is tacking up posters with Troy, the missing boy's face and the caption "Missing Troy Squire". The three of us approach.

"I'll bet you that's her." Dean says

"Well no shit sherlock, if course it's her." I joke, the boys turn towards me.

"Listen sweetheart you may be helping us, but that doesn't give you the right to curse."

"Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say shit, fuck, crap. Sorry!" I giggle, making Sam smirk. Dean ignores me and walks up to the young woman.

"You must be Amy." Dean points out.

"Yeah." She says as she looks towards us. "Yeah, Troy told us about you. We're his uncles. I'm Dean, this is Sammy and that's-" Dean was saying, trying to think on what I should be. "-my girlfriend Y/n." I give him a weird look and so does Sam, girlfriend? I thought. He couldn't have gone with sister or something?

"He never mentioned you to me." Amy walks away as the three of us tag along.

"Well, that's Troy, I guess. We're not around much, we're up in Modesto."

"We never really talk to Troy much, teenager's these days. Never wanna hang out with the adults." I chimes in as another young woman, comes up to Amy and puts a hand on her arm.

"Hey, are you okay?" She asks, while eyeing the three of us.

"Yeah." Amy replies.

"Do you mind if we ask you a couple questions?" I asked. "You probably know my nephew to be better then I do."

"Woah trying to get married already babe" Dean jokes as he puts an arm around my shoulder. "I thought the man asks the woman?"

"Well, 'darling' technically I am the one who is the man in this relationship." Sam and the two girls try not to giggle.

~

The five of us are sitting in a booth, Dean and Sam opposite Amy and Rachel while I'm sitting at the end of the table with a normal chair. The chair was turned away from the table as I was facing the four if them.

"So...Amy." I start. "What happened the night Troy disappeared?"

"I was on the phone with Troy. He was driving home. He said he would call me right back, and...he never did."

"He didn't say anything strange?" Sam asks, Amy shakes her head.

"No. Nothing I can remember."

"I like your necklace." I state, Amy holds the pendant she's wearing, a pentagram in a circle, and looks down at it.

"Troy gave it to me. Mostly to scare my parents-" Amy laughs. "-with all that devil stuff.

"Do you know where he got it?"

"Um...no actually."

Sam laughs a little and looks down, then up.

"Actually, it means just the opposite. A pentagram is protection against evil. Really powerful. I mean, if you believe in that kind of thing." Sam says.

"Okay. Thank you, Unsolved Mysteries."

Dean jokes, takes his arm off the back of Sam's seat and leans forward. "Here's the deal, ladies. The way Troy disappeared, something's not right. So if you've heard anything..." Amy and Rachel look at each other. "What is it?"

"Well, it's just... I mean, with all these guys going missing, people talk." Rachel, the other girl says. Dean and Sam speak in chorus. "What do they talk about?"

"It's kind of this local legend. This one girl? She got murdered out on Centennial, like decades ago." Dean looks at Sam, who watches Rachel attentively, nodding. "Well, supposedly she's still out there. She hitchhikes, and whoever picks her up? Well, they disappear forever."

"So let me guess you believe in this so called legend?" I ask.

"It's a possibility, you never know." Sam and Dean look at each other.

Considering that Rachel mentioned this legend, we made a trip to the library. Dean was in the computer with a web browser open to the archive search page for the Jericho Herald. The words "Female Murder Hitchhiking" are typed into the search box. Dean clicks go; the screen tells him there are "(0) Result". Dean replaces "Hitchhiking" with "Centennial Highway" with the same response.

"Your not gonna find anything in the internet. You gotta go old school." I point out.

Sam sighs, who is sitting next to him, watching.

"Let me try." He offered, Dean smacks Sam's hand.

"I got it." Sam shoves Dean's chair out of the way and takes over. "Dude!" Dean hits Sam in the shoulder. "You're such a control freak."

"You two are definitely brothers." I giggle, the boys just shake there heads. I push both of them out of the way "If you want to find a spirit, you gotta go dark. Angry spirits are born out of violent death, right?"

"Yeah." Dean agrees.

"Well, it's not murder." I replace "Murder" with "Suicide" and find an article entitled "Suicide on Centennial". Both if the boys seemed surprised. I open the article, dated April 25, 1981, I read what the article had to say. "A local woman's drowning death was ruled a suicide, the county Sheriff's Department said earlier today. Constance Welch, 24, of 4636 Breckenridge Road, leapt off Sylvania Bridge, at mile 33 of Centennial Highway, and subsequently drowned last night. Deputy J. Pierce told reporters that, hours before her death, Ms. Welch logged a call with 911 emergency services. In a panicked tone, Ms. Welch described how she found her two young children, 5 and 6, in the bathtub, after leaving them alone for several minutes. I continued to skim the article. " Here this is what the husband said, What happened to my children was a terrible accident. And it must have been too much for my wife. Our babies were gone, and Constance just couldn't bear it. Now I ask that you all please respect my privacy during this trying time."

"So she committed suicide." Sam says. "Good job Y/n."

"Quiet there's more. At the time of the children's death and Ms. Welch's subsequent suicide, Mr. Welch was at the Frontier auto salvage yard, where he works the graveyard shift as associate manager. Connie might have been quiet, but she was the sweetest, most caring girl I ever knew, said Deanna Kripke, a neighbor. She just doted on those children."

Dean raises his eyebrows.

"Hm. The bridge look familiar to you?" Dean asks.

~

The three of us walk along the bridge, then stop to lean on the railing and look down at the river.

"So this is where Constance took the swan dive." Dean states.

"So you think Dad would have been here?" Sam asks.

"If your dad was here then he would've stopped the spirit right?" I wondered.

"Well, he's chasing the same story and we're chasing him."

"Okay, so now what?"

"Now we keep digging until we find him. Might take a while." Sam stops and looks at Dean.

"Dean, I told you, I've gotta get back by Monday-" Dean turns around.

"Monday. Right. The interview."

"Yeah."

"Yeah, I forgot. You're really serious about this, aren't you? You think you're just going to become some Lawyer? Marry your girl?"

"Maybe. Why not?"

"Does Jessica know the truth about you? I mean, does she know about the things you've done?" Sam steps closer, I could tell a fight was about to break out.

"No, and she's not ever going to know."

"Well, that's healthy. You can pretend all you want, Sammy. But sooner or later you're going to have to face up to who you really are."

Dean turns around and keeps walking, Sam follows.

"Guys c'mon we got more important things to do." I state.

"Stay out of this Y/n!" Both of them say at the same time.

"Who am I really Dean?" Sam says.

"You're one of us." Sam hurries to get in front of Dean.

"No. I'm not like you. This is not going to be my life."

"You have a responsibility to-"

"To Dad? And his crusade? If it weren't for pictures I wouldn't even know what Mom looks like. And what difference would it make? Even if we do find the thing that killed her, Mom's gone. And she isn't coming back." Dean grabs Sam by the collar and shoves him up against the railing of the bridge. Instantly I push Dean back, he begins to protest.

"Y/n-"

"No enough out of both of you. Focus, look if San wants out if this life then so be it. You can't change that, I may not know much about what you guys do for a living but I know damn well I wouldn't want to be hunting monsters all the time."

"What do you mean don't know much about what we do?" Sam questioned, clearly aggravated. "You brought her into this!"

"She decided this not me! I gave her the offer to walk away!"

"That wasn't her decision to make! If Y/D/N kept her out if this then you shouldn't have brought her with you!"

"She's eighteen! She can do whatever the hell she wants!"

"No Dean she's not eighteen! She's seventeen! She doesn't turn eighteen till (your birthday)." Dean looks at me, clearly surprised that I lied. However I wasn't paying attention, the spirit of Constance was standing at the edge of the bridge.

"Uh guys." The boys forget there argument and stand infront of me, like I'm something to be protected. Consance looks over at them, then steps forward off the edge. We run to the railing and look over.

"Where'd she go?" I asked.

"I don't know." Sam said, then behind us, the Impala's engine starts and its headlights come on, catching our attention.

"What the-who the fuck is driving your car!?" Dean pulls the keys out of his pocket and jingles them. The car jerks into motion, heading straight for them.

"Run!" I yell. The car is moving faster than we are, when it gets too close, the boys dive over the railing but it was to late for me.

The New Hunter Masterlist