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#oh but he looks so fucking good the whole movie
starfxkrreloaded · 3 days
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blurb for when unclefaux!jj pops her cherry??
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your dad would kill him if he found out. jj was treated like family and here he was with you ass up in his bed like a slut. and at first he thought he pushed it too far--the porn in the dvd player was just supposed to shake you up a bit, not scare you. and at first that's what he thought he did.
you spent the whole movie stiff as a board, taking large swigs of beer like it'll soothe your nerves as your mind kept flashing back to the video. the actress looked like you. that was something you couldn't unpack yet, not with jj's thigh pressed against yours as you watched a movie.
"you alright?" he had nudged you softly, but you still couldn't look him in the eye.
"can i go lay down? i don't feel well."
jj let you up without protest, but you could see how worried he was from the corner of your eye.
fuck. he was content to give you some time, but he heard a soft whimpering from his room and he was worried he shit the bed big time, so he went to check on you.
"look princess i'm really sorry i- oh shit."
you were on your stomach with your face was buried in one of his t-shirts as your fingers circled your clit, clearly it wasn't going how you wanted because you looked up at him teary eyed, "what the fuck i wanted to be alone!"
"nuh uh. my house, my room, what are you doin?"
curling in on yourself you sob, "fuck i don't know! it's all your fault you left that stupid porno in the dvd player and then you act like nothing happened and-"
"hey hey hey, i was comin in here to say i'm sorry. but you're playing with your pussy in my bed mind you. you're lucky i don't fuckin ccall your dad." that sent you into hysterics, whining and pleading for him to keep it between the two of you, "lucky for you im a reasonable guy and i'd feel worse if i didn't fix it."
finally he steps into the room, sitting next to you as he rubs his hand over your soft thigh, "we'll just keep it between us okay? no harm, no foul."
with a sniffle you flip over, bringing your hand from between your thighs, and jj has to stifle a groan when he feels the damp pads of your fingers ghost his arm, "promise?"
"promise."
what he wasn't prepared for was for you to be a virgin. you had always skirted around the topic, and jj figured your shyness was due to shame about your sexual escapades, not a lack thereof.
"jj it hurts."
"you're okay, look i'm almost halfway in, you're doin fine sweetheart."
it felt like he was tearing you in two, but you tried your best to relax, when you reached underneath you could feel where you were split open around him and shuddered when he bottomed out.
"goddamn, that's what i been wantin." if he was a better man he'd go slow, he would take you on your back and kiss the tears off your damp cheeks.
but jj was greedy and impatient--setting a harsh pace as quickly as possible as you squirmed underneath him. you were too good, all he could focus on was that tight, wet heat sucking him in as his hips crashed into your ass.
and you were a blubbering mess, "p-please, hurtshurts-"
"shh, don't worry. i got you. open your mouth." jj's finger's did little to alleviate the pain, but it mingled with the pleasure perfectly when he yanked his spit soaked fingers out your mouth to toy with your clit, feeling you clench around more and more.
groaning, he pushed you flat on the bed, keeping you pinned as he fucked you harder from this angle, pressing hard against that sticky spot inside of you making you squeak with each thrust, "look at you takin my dick, always knew you'd be a slut but fuck."
by now you were damn near incoherent, muttering, imaslutimaslut, over and over as you tried to throw your ass back against him in the tight position. heat rushed to your cunt, and you were wet to the point of obscenity while you moaned beneath him.
but your sobs reach deaf ears when he hooks an arm around your throat, biting down hard on your cheek as he pulses inside of you. when you cum it's like you want to keep him trapped inside, choking him off at the base making him groan. you whimper at the feeling of him, hot and sticky in your cunt as he pulls out, collapsing next to you with a hand on your ass.
"shit, m'sorry i got carried away c'mere." jj scoops you up into his arms, kissing across your cheeks, focusing on the blooming bruise right at the apple, " lemme make it up to you."
"but i'm sore."
he huffs, kissing you square on the mouth this time, "well, let me make it better."
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godsworstson · 3 months
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jackass 4.5 is just a documentary on the sadism of johnny knoxville
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todayisafridaynight · 11 months
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whatever og text i had in mind for this post about ko shibasaki looking like sayama in this movie is completely cancelled on account of utsumi (this character)'s first name being kaoru and i only found this out cause i was looking up her name just to be sure when making this post
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like jesus christ i legally have to make this post now
#snap chats#they literally never say her first name in the movie. i think lol LIKE WHEN I FOUND OUT I WAS JUST 'NO FUCKING WAY'#i do have to be tbh and say her face /is/ a little more round than sayama's#and its absolutely predominantly because of how her bangs and wardrobe are so close to sayama's that i think she look like her#BUT I CAAAANT THE WHOLE MOVIE I WAS JUST THINKIN ABOUT SAYAMA... i miss her...#OH RIGHT THE MOVIE THOUGH noooo fuck you this movie was so good it actually made me want to write a summary for it LMAOOO#LIKE I LIKE WRITING SUMMARIES BUT IVE JUST BEEN SO LAZY ABOUT IT WITH THE PAST FEW THINGS IVE SEEN BUT GOD.#ignore the fact i finished this movie two hours ago i was too busy fiddling with a card holder kit but. ill make a post about that next--#THIS MOVIE THOUGH NOOOOO IT WAS SO GOOD //SCREAMS AND YELLS AND DESTROYS A SNOWGLOBE//#god the part where ishigami and yukawa are walking by the homeless and it just lingers on an empty spot.. LIKE I THOUGHT I WAS WACK#CAUSE I WAS LIKE 'hang on wasnt there a guy there last scene' and obviously there was since the shot lingered right#BUUUUTT WHEN IT WAS REVEALED DOWN THE LINE SHUT UPPP I LITERALLY YELLED IM SO GLAD. my roommates arent home..#on god i thought the movie was gonna end with utsumi and fukawa's convo from the beginning#and i was gonna make a gaf about how fukawa was acting irrationally because he was too in love LMAOOO#BUT THEN IT KEPT GOING AND. im so glad it did. ishigami valid tbh#id also cover up and take blame for AND ACTUALLY commit murder for a girl if she said hi to me and made me lunch while i was trying to kms#while fukawa and ishigami were talkin that first night tho i just thought of after the rain.. lol... maybe the mangaka was inspo'd by that.#anyway. this movie was great. it reminded me of sherlock but if it was directed well and actually let you solve the mystery too#CAUSE WHILE I WAS WATCHING THERE WERE POINTS WHERE I TOO WAS JUST 'hang on' AND I JUST POCKETED THE INFO FOR LATER#i kicked and screamed when ishigami was talking abut how he formats his tests LIKE I SAID 'oh you fucking slipped'#when ishigami called and told her he had a white envelope in there bitch i knew it was gonna be the stalker letter i YELLED#LIKE I LIKE HOW THE MOVIE SETS THINGS UP SO ABUNDANTLY. IT'S FUN SEEING IT FIT IN THE MOVIE LATER ON#the twist of there being two bodies was so fun tho cause at the start of the movie i was sure two murders happened the same night#so when it was played off as just one i was like Oh. Ok. im still stumped on how he snuck a body out of the apartment#but yk what one detail is like. whatever in comparison to the rest of the movie being fun to watch#god im running out of tags POINT IS. PLEAAASE watch this movie if you got two hours#ive left some minor warnings on my Watchlist doc but there's nothing. TOO extreme ??#i mean there's an aforementioned suicide attempt but aside from that it's nothing too grotesque. for an rgg fan ig#ok bye i have to ramble about the card holder i got <3
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horsemage · 5 months
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I think we should bring back basic etiquette lessons such as shutting the fuck up when you’re watching a movie in a group that is not exclusively your friend group 🙂
#welcome to another Mick Airs Out Their Grievances and by god is it a VERY long one#prob best if u don't expand the tags#am I being maybe a bit meaner about this than I would be for any other movie? maybe but pac rim is one of my favorite movies of all time#so I think I get a pass on this one.#one of the groups on campus is hosting movie nights & I went to this one bc I've only ever watched pac rim on my laptop and wanted to watch#it on a larger screen. yay yippee I love this movie!#there r maybe 10-ish of us in this room and a three person friend group is sitting on the couch one of whom has seen the movie and two who#have not. okay so far so normal.#and then the movie starts and they won't! stop! fucking! commentating! the whole fucking movie!!! I don't have a problem with doing that#when I'm in just my friend group because I know that I can tell my friend to stop talking or pause the movie or whatnot but not when I'm in#a large group w people I'm not good friends with ffs#and the comments aren't even funny or anything they're all oh this is JUST like in iron widow!! oh they're SO gay and autistic!!! and#they're talking so loud about this that it completely drowns out the movie audio which has already been turned up a few times#like. be considerate!! some of us want to yknow actually listen to what's going on and not whatever bullshit you're saying#I nearly walked out three or four times before I actually wound up doing so#I may have been a bit of a bitch at the end but I don't care. I got up to leave because this was not an enjoyable environment and one of#them offered to turn the movie down if it was too loud. this caught me a bit off guard since I expected them to still be so wrapped up in#their convo and. well. I may have said 'it's not the movie that's too loud' before closing the door#this also reminds me a lot about my issues with online shipping culture and it bleeding through into how we interact with media irl#this is probably heavily influenced by my aromanticism but I'm so sick of people constantly reading romantic relationships into everything#AND placing more importance on those relationships than any other form. I don't mind romance in media. I think if done right it has great#emotional impact on a story but when a movie is running and when other people who may not want to hear it are in the room watching it too#is not the time to be loudly saying 'he's autistic!' 'they're in love!' 'she has a crush on him!'#I have my own interpretations of the movie some of which agree with what they said and some of which don't but that's beside the point of#knowing how to coexist politely in public#anyway. I think they were awful and annoying and they ruined my night out.#I think I'm just so incredibly mad about this because I love the movie and I was looking forward to watching it in a group of people who#found it cool as well while still having some modicum of politeness#I almost wish I had been meaner but that's the extreme annoyance talking I think#hater hour over love u guys bye
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whysopasta · 1 year
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day of the dead (1985) might be my new favorite horror movie
#might slightly beat out the thing (1982)#great writing acting practical effects and it's actually pretty scary!#nobody does zombies like romero im telling you#i neeeeed to watch the original dawn of the dead#i've seen night of the living dead i've seen day of the dead and i've seen the dawn of the dead remake#which was actually pretty good even though im not a big snyder fan#night of the living dead is one of the movies that made me deathly afraid of zombies as a kid#and i only watched the first 5 minutes akdhkdh#i've seen the whole thing now of course#they're zombie movies where the real bad guy always ends up being power-tripping militarized assholes#day of the dead being that case the most#spoilers >>>>#every other zombie movie totally gives up on the zombies outside of a medical cure or vaccine#day of the dead explicitly goes no. they can be redeemed. they can be retaught. they can remember.#the only reason it all gets fucked up is because of that MOTHERFUCKER#oh but he gets his. it's too late but he gets his#never thought a zombie shooting a guy with a gun would be the most satisfying cinematic climax ever but guess what.#it was#and then that fucker gets torn apart while he's still alive and it's looks so fucking cool because the practical effects in that movie rule#oh man and the ENDING. im still thinking about the ending#it's so.... it's so abrupt and jarring and contradictory that you can't help but question it#it feels almost... delusional? in denial?#they're running to the copter and there's a wave of zombies and it's hard to tell if they can make it there fast enough#they're getting in and at the last second the girl gets grabbed#but hardly before you can even process that...#snap cut. the three of them are on a beach. no zombies in sight. she marks off a date on a homemade calendar#it feels impossibly idealic... like the movie can't bear to give you an unhappy ending so instead it lies#it's not impossible they made it out. they could've gotten the zombie off her and made it out#but the way it's structured makes it so ambiguous
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bi-writes · 1 month
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I think first make out session of Simon and his mail order bride happened because she wore sundress all day ~~ i'm a bit addicted to the way you writing Simon
mail-order bride
reader described as curvier/plus-sized 18+
simon has gotten away with a lot of things ever since he married you. he's kept a respectful distance; gentle touches, affectionate ones, sure, but it's been easy to brush off the itch in the back of his head ever since he scratched it just enough when he kissed you for the first time.
when the itch becomes too severe, he's been able to hide away for a little while; running it out of his system working out, shaking it off in the field, drinking so it quiets when he makes his way to the pub.
but it's gotten a lot harder lately to pretend he doesn't see you for what you are.
a pretty girl.
he tells you that you're pretty all the time. in the mornings when you're still waking up. sitting at the counter as you watch him make sandwiches for lunch. pushing the cart in the aisle at the market, picking out the right cuts of meat or seeing which crisps you both can enjoy for movie night. and you are pretty all those times, all the time, in fact, and you were pretty when he kissed you, too.
but fuck. you're also...you're also so fucking pretty.
simon kicks off his boots at the front door, holding a few paper bags in his hands from his trip to the store. the weather has been getting warmer, summer creeping by (his most dreaded season since it forces him to take off layers he'd rather keep), and you had been begging simon for some sweet icy treats and a water fountain for the cat (it'll keep her from drinking out of your water glasses, simon).
when he steps into the kitchen, you're coming in from the backyard, flowers in your hands that the neighbor must have given you.
and you're wearing the cutest little white and red sundress (and suddenly he doesn't hate summer so much anymore).
it's got a cherry pattern on it and puffy sleeves. the bodice hugs you until the middle, where it fans out in a pillowy skirt, stopping just above your knees. there's a soft bow tied around the back, but simon really can't help himself from his eyes that narrow in on your figure and how incredible you look with the sunlight behind you.
"hi, simon," you coo, and simon glares, fucking tease. he has an inkling you don't even know what you're doing to him, you can't, not with that sweet little smile and the way you rock onto your toes. you even tied your hair up with a bow, and simon can't help but feel like you're his little gift, all wrapped up just for him.
one he wants to pluck, unravel until you reveal whatever you've been hiding underneath it all--
"oh! look it! oh, simon!" you giggle, grabbing the bag from him when you see the box that pokes out of it. you pull out a sweet, red ice lolly, cherry-flavored, and you lean up on your toes to give simon a big, wet kiss on his cheek before sucking it into your mouth. "mmm...thank you...just what i needed, it's so warm today."
bloody fuckin' christ.
your tongue is so pink. it's sliding up the edge of it until you suck it back into your mouth, and simon lets out the shakiest breath. it's unlike him, and you turn to face him fully when you notice the way he's staring at you. he looks good today, dark denim jeans and a wrinkled white t-shirt that stretches around his big arms, and your eyes dart to his tattoo sleeve for just a moment before you smile back up at him.
"what?" you ask him gently. "you want some?"
instead of offering him his own lolly, you simply tilt yours in his direction. he huffs, letting out an irritated laugh before he leans forward a licks a fat stripe up the side of the cherry ice.
you smile a little as he does, and you don't even realize your gaze has dropped. you're eyeing the way his mouth moves, taking in the hinge of his jaw and the light stubble along it and the scar that stretches across his whole face that you kiss sometimes when he falls asleep before you.
he groans a little as he takes a bite of the lolly, and you seize at the sound, dropping the lolly into the sink on accident as you scramble to look up at him. you stare at each other, lidded brown eyes just piercing into your own. you're quiet for only a few more moments before you're throwing yourself at him.
he nearly slams you against the closest wall. your back hits it firmly, rattling the pictures that hang there, and you throw your arms around his neck as he kisses you feverishly. his hands slide down your waist to your lower back, and you stand on your toes, his palms cupping your ass before he picks you up with ease, guiding your plush thighs to wrap around his waist as he holds you there.
you don't know how long you kiss against the wall, but you're breathless when he pulls away. you chase him, kissing along his nose, his cheek, any of the skin that you can get, and simon grunts lowly, cradling the back of your neck.
"we shouldn't," he mutters.
"why not?" you whine, and he hisses, looking into your eyes, hungry, big man, struggling to keep himself away from you. but it isn't what you want, you want him to kiss you, you want more, more, more--
you stand back on your toes, pushing him backwards. simon follows you, his hands bunched around the skirt of your dress as you walk him further into the living room until the couch hits the back of his knees, and he sits with a heavy breath. you bend to go sit in his lap, and simon curses under his breath, leaning his head back against the couch as your cleavage crowds his line of sight.
"fuckin' christ, baby," simon says lowly, running a rough hand over his face. he grunts when you take a seat in his lap, stretching your knees to straddle him, and you cage him in with your arms as you guide his chin back down so you can kiss him. you slot your mouth over his, kissing him lazily, and when you press your chest against his, he breathes out heavily when he feels your pebbled nipples through your dress. "fuck--fuck, fuck--"
"not yet," you giggle between kisses, and simon groans audibly as he slips two big hands under your dress and grabs both sides of your ass, his fingertips slipping under the lace of your panties so he can get a warm feel of you. you sit yourself down deeper in his lap, and you pull away slowly when you feel him underneath you.
he blinks his eyes open slowly, and you tentatively sit a little more in his lap, your eyes widening a little when you feel him between your thighs.
holy fucking shit--
"jesus," you stutter, and he looks away from you, ears reddening, and you're quick to cup his cheeks to bring his eyes back to you. you smile a little, leaning in again, and you press your forehead to his before giving him the gentlest grind of your hips. "oh--simon--" you kiss him again, soft, whispering against his lips, "s-so...you're so--"
"mhm," he nods, and you move so your lips are against his ear, giving him a light kiss where his jaw and neck meet.
"i'd say you're too big for me," you sigh, closing your eyes, "but i'm a riley now." you giggle. "'n we can handle anything..can't we, simon?"
"shit--"
you squeak a little when he wraps a hand in your hair and tugs, pressing your pelvis to his as he ruts his hips up against yours. you kiss him hard, slipping your tongue into his mouth, and he chokes on his moans, big arms keeping you pressed to him as he pants into your mouth.
he stills, face a little scrunched up as he sits there with you. you keep kissing him lazily, exploring the way he tastes, licking over his teeth and bottom lip, up until he pushes you just that much away and groans in frustration.
your eyes open, and you giggle, and simon smooths his hands up the bodice of your dress, his eyes blown wide as he takes in how pretty you look in it. pretty little angel in his lap, a nice weight to ground him as he tries not to think about the mess he's made of himself.
"i assume you like the dress?" you ask, and when you laugh, simon can see the red on your tongue from the lolly. he knows if he kisses you again and sucks on your pretty tongue, you'll taste like that awful cherry, taste as sugar-sweet as you really are. simon leans back a little, propping you up on his thighs, shaking his head as he runs a big hand down his solid middle.
"well," simon mutters. "'aven't cum in my fuckin' pants since i was a bloody kid, so i'd say so."
"w-wha--! simon!"
you cover your eyes, overcome with shyness, with warmth, not believing really that anyone could you want that much. that anyone could really want you at all.
but when you laugh, he does, too.
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hon3y-y · 5 months
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Roomie!sukuna doesn't even get horny for anyone other than you anymore. You have the wettest, nastiest pussy he's ever seen- and he deserves the best so nobody but you will do. You're fucking so many other fine men now that you dont even give him a second glance when he walks out the shower in just a towel to tease you. And oh, his temper when one of your hookups pick you up and you don't come home for the weekend. Or even worse, they stay for the weekend. Sukuna has never let a girl sleep over at the apartment but now there are two colognes in the bathroom, two pairs or men's shoes at the door, and he can almost never see you in the living room without some other man hanging off your side
read the other parts here! : part 1 part 2 part 4
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he’s literally so embarrassingggg it’s not even funny. he’ll walk around and flex his muscles, smirk on his puffy lips as the water drips down his ripped torso. he stands outside your open door, you’re looking down at your phone deciding on whether to spend the night at choso’s or nanami’s (pick choso, nanami gets up at like 5 am 🙄), “showers empty..” sukuna basically purr’s, resting his arm on the doorway.
and you literally could not give less of a fuck💀
you just nod, mumbling a ‘thanks’ as you focus on putting both their names in a generator and letting that choose your fate for the night. let’s just say sukuna was extremely angry when a motorcycle pulls up and you just giggle and hop onto it, kissing the stupid leather clad boy while throwing on the custom bikers helmet choso had made for you. and to top it off, sukuna had to physically restrain himself from blowing up your phone on where the fuck you are??
messages;
ryo<3: didn’t see you this morning
you: i’m staying with choso for the weekend! sorry, should’ve told you last night:/
you: i also won’t be home after wednesday satoru is taking me to this festival! i’ll send pics😋
ryo<3: have fun 👍
omfg he’s losing it. he literally will spend the whole time in the gym, refusing to be in the empty apartment for longer than eight hours for sleep. he feels like there’s a cement brick in his chest when you’re whisked away by these men. but nothing is worse than when he stays over.
he being satoru.
it was becoming a huge issue. his longest “sleepover” was a week. a week where you weren’t even home for half of it. but sukuna was. he was there for all of it.
there was now a third toothbrush taking up countertop space in the bathroom, he would find satoru’s clothes in the wash (which would always somehow be in there whenever ryo specifically had to use it??), and gojo absolutely loved to make out with you everywhere but inside of your room and sukuna started to hated it. publicly claiming you in front of the guy who literally made it possible🙄 unbelievable.
let’s just say you take a break from bringing satoru over, doing your best to settle the tension at home. but sukuna couldn’t let it go, not when he stares at the stupid fucking blue electric toothbrush and knows that it’s only temporary.
at this point he didn’t even give a fuck about the other guys, you can keep them as long as he’s added onto your roster.
it’s been a while since the two of you had a movie night. something that used to, at the very least, happen once a month has been delayed due to your extra activities. the two of you relaxed into the couch, the movie was a random one you found choosing whatever looked the best by cover and for the first time in a while, sukuna felt like he had you.
“did you buy the candy?”
“shit, yeah. i think i left it in my room?”
“go get it while i make the popcorn!” you smiled up at him, your eyes sparkling excitedly. you looked so cute and soft, and ryo got a glimpse of your cute pink panties when you bent over to grab something so he was feeling just as good. he could already picture the little damp spot he’d create after teasing you and then force you to beg and make it up to him.
he thought about it the whole walk to his room, picking up the bag and then back to the living room, fantasizing about what he plans to do. and just as he’s about to turn the corner, a head of white fluffy hair is laying on your lap, legs spread to take up the full length of the couch. and the only seat available? the one farthest from you.
“i hope you don’t mind, satoru said he missed us!”
us… sukuna looked down at gojo, looking at the content quirk in his lip while he snuggled into you more, moving one of your hands into his hair to play with it. ryo’s eye twitched before he put the bag down and went back into his room, the door slamming behind him. the noise makes you force satoru up, a pit forming in your stomach. you didn’t want sukuna to feel uncomfortable in his own house—
“damn, what’s he so mad abo- he got macha kitkats!? mmm~”
*bonus*
sukuna is literally in his room about to dry heave because??? what alternative version of himself gave him such bad karma?!? in his room like this;
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but quietly, because he DEFINITELY doesn’t want you to see him like this. such a fein🤦‍♀️
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a/n: i didn’t put smut because i didn’t want to get repetitive BUT should we finally let sukuna get a taste?? part 4 where he finally gets her?? lmk🫶
*not edited*
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begaycommittreason · 11 months
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honestly i forgot that dick originally wanted to adopt jason as well just imagine how chaotic that would’ve been like
——————
jay: uh what’s for dinner
dick: well we have cereal and…
dick:
dick: hey don’t kids like the whole breakfast for dinner thing?
jay: i miss alfred
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dick: and for a bed i’d like to introduce you to this lovely thing called a futon!!
jay: …better than a cardboard box i guess
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jay: can i fight crime yet
dick: you’re a child
jay: you’re a slightly larger child
dick: …fair point, no extreme violence and minimum 4 flips per patrol
——————
dick: when a mommy and daddy love each other very much—
jay: i am not doing this with you dickface i know what sex is
dick: wait no little wing i have a powerpoint presentation. it’s color coded and everything!
jay: i wish i’d stayed on the street
——————
dick: okay that’s enough, you know what, get on top of the fridge
jay, hissing: this house is a fucking nightmare
——————
jay: hey some friends at school wanted to watch a movie, is it okay if they come here—
dick: yes, yes! oh my god finally i’m so proud you’re making friends jaybird, i’m gonna be the coolest host dad ever i’ll make pizza and
jay, already on the phone: yeah he said no, sorry guys, can we do it at tommy’s?
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dick teaching jason trapeze and circus stuff 😭
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jay: god the circus is so lame
dick: exCUSE ME i’m disowning you, get out
jay: WHAT
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dick, who forgot to pick up jay from school: oh god i’m so sorry, i’ll never do it again
jay, who’s thrilled to be allowed in the library after hours every time, but never one to pass on a guilt trip: wow dick i never thought you of all people would abandon me
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dick: listen my support group says-
jay: you joined a support group for single moms dickface, that doesn’t count
dick: it does too, they all think i’m very brave for doing this alone
jay: for fucks sake-
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dick, coming home late from a date and seeing the lights on: uhh hello?
jay, sitting on a stool: and just where have you been all night young man?
dick: IM 26
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jason, pointing at the wayne family photos: so who do we like, and who do i hate on principle
dick:
dick: okay so this is complicated
jason: there’s only like three living people??
dick: right. so—
——————
dick, who pulled an all-nighter working on a case: good morning!
jay, who was reading jane austen and didn’t notice the sun came up: right…morning
dick:
jay:
dick: you didn’t sleep did you
jay: well clearly neither did you
dick: fair enough, coffee?
——————
jay: so this guy was shovin’ me around and-
dick: i’ll kill him
jay: …no.
dick: but-
jay: his mom’s the librarian and i can’t afford to fall out of sharon’s good graces
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dick: look it’s not my fault i’m so charismatic
jay: i’m not asking for a lot here
dick: you’re asking me to suppress my nature
jay: i’m asking you to stop flirting with all my teachers at parent teacher conferences
dick: c’mon it’s not that big of a deal
jay: …miss shields gave me her phone number to pass along the other day. so did mr. burnes, it’s getting outta hand dick
dick: oh i see, this is serious
dick: she’s really cute, maybe i should-
jay: STOP IT
——————
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dxxdhood · 2 months
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drains me slowly
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pairing: wade wilson x gn!reader
summary: deadpool finally invites you, the coworker he has a massive crush on, over, which means the two of you end up doing more than just watching a movie.
tags: smut (18+), sub!wade wilson, dom!reader, pain kink, use of superpowers to fuel a pain kink, light masochism, teasing, gentle dom, hand job, scratching, body worship
wc: 3.3k
a/n: fic inspired by the new deadpool movie coming out!!! also, title is from love me dead by ludo.
No surprise that Wade wasn’t exactly anyone’s favorite– that goes for among the heroes he’s worked with and throughout his life in general. He’s – to put it in the kindest way anyone’s ever told him – fucking annoying. Oh, he’s more than aware that he’s a little too out-of-pocket, abrasive, impulsive– a nightmare to interact with, really. And those were just the recent comments made by the closest thing he has to coworkers! The shit he heard from people growing up was leagues worse. 
Look, having a rough start in life isn’t uncommon and he’s sure as hell not gonna get the tiny violin out for himself and throw his own little pity party, but he’s grown enough since his healing factor got beat out of him to acknowledge that he’s had it tough over the years.
He’s still going, though! Yeah, he may not always be the best at doing his laundry quick enough to get any clean clothes to wear, or at stopping his room from becoming cluttered with too many half-empty water bottles, but he’s still making it by, day by day.
But, well, it’s still really hard to constantly put himself out there, get assigned – or infinitely more likely, just shove himself into – whatever jobs or missions he feels like taking on when everyone treats him like Jar Jar Binks.
That was until you came along. So, obviously you’re crazy hot – he’s gotta get that out of the way first – but more than that, you were confident. Competent, too, and those rarely coincide in Wade’s experience. You mostly worked on call, joining the occasional mission, battle, or investigation because your mutant powers came in handy often, but you also still kept up with your day job. Honestly, Wade thinks the reason why you weren’t always present in fights was to stop the other mutants from being out of a job. Your ability to slowly deteriorate surrounding biological tissue, while horrifying and a pain in the ass to control – your words – was basically winning on easy mode.
But no, you were adamant about keeping your involvement with the X-Men infrequent– only joining when your presence was absolutely necessary. Apparently nonstop high stress situations aren't good for your mental health– who knew?
And he wants to pretend he became obsessed with you because of all those things, and of course they helped, but really, you had him at hello. Or well, you bothering to say hello and actually talk to him in the first place, to ask him questions about his life in moments of downtime where usually he’d be left with an unenthusiastic audience instead of a warm-hearted listener who actually laughed at his jokes.
So, of course, he has to go and fuck it up.
“So, glad that’s over, huh?” Wade says through a smile, the whites of his mask squeezing as his cheeks rise. “Speaking of over, you wanna come?”
“Over?” you shake your head a little, flashing your teeth as you try and comprehend him. “Right after we took on a whole crime ring?”
“Well, what a better time to unwind, am I right?”
“Oh?” you raise your eyebrows. “We’re unwinding?”
It’s small, but you swear Wade ups his talking speed, “Well, yeah, you know. Watch a movie, order in, show you my Pokemon cards, the works.”
You hum, pretending to consider it, “Depends, you got a holo Charizard?”
And now, for sure, he exhales his relief. “You insult me.”
The two of you enter his apartment not long after you’re dismissed from the mission, and Wade briefly excuses himself to change out of his suit. Making yourself at home, you take a seat on the couch and glance across his living room. His apartment is surprisingly nice. The kitchen and living room are one large, open space with a sleek, modern design. Also, you’d assume someone as chaotic as Wade would keep their house in a messier state, or hell, at least a little dusty, but the living room is spotless. Maybe he cleaned recently? What, was he planning on inviting someone over?
Snorting as you shake your head, a small click from across the hall catches your attention.
You’ve only seen Wade on the job, so naturally he’s always been wearing his red suit, but for some reason, you never stopped to picture him wearing civilian clothes. Actually, now that you’re seeing him in a sweatshirt and sweatpants – awfully warm for this weather – you’re struggling to reconcile the image of him you had in your head with the person right in front of you.
Well, at least until Wade brings up a fist to cover his mouth, illustrating his nervousness, and the tension fizzles out. Only Wade has body language that cartoonishly exaggerated.
“Nice sweats, green looks good on you.”
Wade pauses for a moment, registering your words before he giggles softly, arm falling to his side, “I’ve been thinking about changing the color of my suit. You know, hiding all the blood is great and all, but sometimes I gotta wonder – could this thing be more flattering?”
He walks over with a spring in his step before sitting by your side. Cutely, he wraps you up in the larger blanket first before settling the smaller, throw blanket over himself. You try your hardest not to show your confusion outwardly, but seeing Wade up close now has you questioning his outfit all the more.
He’s a bit tall, so the sweatpants don’t go all the way down to his ankles, but Wade’s wearing calf socks, as if he specifically were trying to avoid them being uncovered. Also, his hoodie’s easily a size or two larger, which makes it the perfect thing to wear to lounge around and watch a movie in, but also, the sleeves cover his entire hand sans his fingers. From the little you can see of them, they look puckered in scars.
But obviously Wade’s hands are scarred– he’s a mercenary. He’s handled all sorts of weapons and been in hundreds of fights over the years. You weren’t expecting his skin to be baby-smooth. 
What’s interesting to you is why he’d go through all the trouble to hide it.
Also, yeah, the most obvious pointers were that the hood of his sweatshirt is up even though you two are indoors in his own home and – how could you forget this one – his Deadpool mask is still on.
Was he just uncomfortable with sharing his identity in general or was he specifically trying to shove distance between the two of you? Whatever, if he doesn’t want to take his mask off with you, he doesn’t have to. You feel a distinct pang in your chest, but you try not to let it color how you respond to him. He’s more than in the right to only share what he feels most comfortable with.
Wade’s been fiddling with the remote while you’ve been – hopefully – subtly looking him over, and the screen finally changes from a streaming service page to the opening of the movie.
“We’re watching The Princess Bride? I didn’t take you for a romantic.”
He bats his eyes – at least, you think he does, given the mask– and speaks in a sweet voice “Why, me? Oh please, I know romance. I’m not going to invite a lovely, gorgeous, incredible person over and force them to watch Die Hard on the first–”
His back straightens out like he’s been electrocuted before he forcibly relaxes his posture to finish his thought.
“Hang-out.”
Okay, you want to go easy on him, especially because he seems so tense, but you can’t just let that one slide. You close the small distance remaining between the two of you, causing your entire side to press against his. Even through his sweatshirt, you can feel how warm he is.
“Mmm, just a hang out?” you mumble, sliding your head onto his shoulder. You’ve done this before, either for comedic effect or just in an attempt to push his buttons the same way he always tries to push yours – which, despite his best efforts, always ends up endearing him to you instead of bothering you – but never in a context like this.
He inhales sharply, and you count the seconds until he finally lets himself release it. Sometimes, you think he takes his healing factor for granted.
Turning his head to peer down at you, Wade considers you for a moment, keeping his face and body language deceptively neutral. You try your hardest to keep your eyes focused on the movie and your body loose and comfortable.
“You want this to be a date?” he says, flat.
“Why, thank you for asking, dear sir,” you copy his sweet voice from earlier before returning to your normal. “Yes, Wade, I like you.”
“I–” he starts, but the words get caught on their way out. His fingers bury themselves in the material of his sweatpants, and the movement draws your attention to them again. Shades of blotchy red and pink curve all across his skin.
Wade doesn’t say anything, which is concerning enough on its own, but following your confession, you feel like he’s more than out of his element. 
“That’s why you invited me over, right?” you try and help him out. “You feel the same, too.”
And then, feeling bold, you turn your head to face his still mask-covered head and kiss him lightly on the cheek. Instantly, you see fireworks go off inside him, because Wade hurriedly shuts the TV off and runs off to close the blinds. There’s barely enough light in the room now to make out shapes, but apparently Wade doesn’t take any issue because he peels his mask back and kisses you on the lips.
His lips are textured, and your intuition flashes quietly in the back of your mind, but for right now, you focus on how energetic he is. If his body is warm, his mouth feels like it’s on fire. He’s constantly moving, trying to experience all of you as fast as possible. 
It’s making your face heat up, how quickly he demands your complete attention and how relentless he is in grabbing it. Wade bites your bottom lip, causing you to gasp into him, and he uses the opportunity to explore across your own teeth and tongue. After a few more seconds, you break away, needing the space to breathe.
“Holy shit,” you whisper, voice rough.
“You’re telling me,” Wade coughs out. “We could’ve been doing that this whole time?”
“Well, all you had to do was ask.”
And although you can’t see him, which you know is the point, you understand something in him has shifted. He gets up from the couch, takes you by the hand, and leads you towards his room. His pace is so quick, you barely comprehend his actions until you’re both standing right in front of his bed.
“Is this okay?” he asks, quiet. You don’t think you’ve ever heard him stifle the amount of words he let loose before.
“Yes, of course it is. But Wade, we have to turn on at least a lamp or something in here.”
“We do?”
“Yeah,” you pause to give him a second to think. “I can’t see you at all like this.”
“What if – and you're just going to have to trust me on this one – you’d prefer it this way,” Wade’s voice is light, but it feels like it’s cracking at the edges.
“And why’s that?”
Not like you’d be able to see, but the anxiety radiating off of him makes him sound wide-eyed, “Huh? Oh, I– uh…”
“Look, if you’re worried about how I’m going to react to you having a bunch of scars– don’t. I don’t mind,” the sound of fabric rustling in front of you makes you think he just flinched. “I figured it out. You’re not sneaky.”
“You say that, but…”
“Wade, I don’t care. And I mean that kindly! Really, it doesn’t bother me.”
Wade starts pacing in front of you, nearly tripping on the leg of the bedpost, “Look, I appreciate the whole hero act you got going on here – really fits you good, you should totally quit your day job – but you don’t have to force yourself, I–”
“Wade, you either confront your insecurities head on or I’m not doing this with you. I told you what I think, the only person who’s going to worry about how you look here is you. We either have sex with a light on or not at all, okay?”
No one speaks for a few seconds once you finish saying your piece, and you cringe, realizing how forceful you must have come off. You’re about to speak up again to apologize when you hear a shudder-filled exhale from a few feet away.
“Jesus H. Christ,” he groans. “You’re so hot when you're putting people in their place.”
Your lips curl into a shaky smile, “Yeah, what else do you think is hot?”
And you can practically hear the gears turning in his head from here.
It’s actually happening. No fucking way he didn’t dream this up. But you were pretty adamant about him getting his head in the game in order for you guys to actually get down and dirty, so for you, he tries to keep his train of thought as focused as possible–  a big ask.
“Bossing anyone – everyone, especially me – around. You using your abilities–” you reach over and find Wade’s hand before running your fingers up his arm. “Shit, umm, using your abilities in general, but, umm, I really like when I’m there.”
“Oh?” you giggle. “When you get to watch, or?”
“When I get to feel.”
Your hand moves over to the nape of his neck, reaching under his hood and mask, to rub at his rough skin. Wade’s nerves light on fire as he waits for you to respond– for some reason, it never feels like your words come out fast enough.
“You got a thing for pain, Wilson?”
He chuckles, “You’d be surprised.”
“Okay, but are you sure? I can try, but it might not be all that good for you.”
“Don’t worry,” he thinks back to all those times he had a hard on while the two of you were fighting together. “It’ll be great for me.”
You hum, “Alright, then, but you tell me to stop the second you don’t like something, okay?”
“Aye, aye, captain,” he salutes, though you probably can’t see it. “And, same goes for you.”
“What a gentleman, letting me destroy him and giving me an out.”
He’s blushing something furious and he’s never been more grateful for the dark, “Anything for you.”
Those are the last words he whispers before he begins undressing. He knows you probably meant for him to strip with the light on, but he’s really not so sure he could stomach being looked at like a bug under a microscope. The attention, while electrifying, was already starting to get to him, so he lets himself stay in his comfort zone a little longer. As a treat. 
Once his sweats are off, he hesitantly peels off his mask before slipping into bed, keeping most of his body under the covers. After shutting his eyes, he clicks the lamplight on.
You’re not saying anything. That’s– a sign? A good one, a bad one, Wade doesn’t know. He’s trying so hard to keep his breathing steady, but he can feel his body start shaking all on its own.
You join him on the bed, kneeling next to him, before your warm breath falls across his cheeks as you kiss his forehead. Only then does he open his eyes, and you reward him by cupping his cheek in your hand.
“There,” you say. “Wasn’t so hard, was it?”
Wade gets the strong urge to snort, and so he does, but your eyes narrow. There’s a soft scratching at the back of his skull as you snake your hand over, and quickly you dig your nails in slightly. Wade has to bite his tongue to keep the noise in.
“I’m sorry, is that funny to you?”
“No!” he whispers sharply as you bring your hand down to scratch along the line of his neck.
“Good, seems like you’re learning.”
You kiss him, teeth clacking together at first before Wade melts into it. Your hand is still slowly exploring his body, running along the line of his shoulder and towards his upper arm. When you reach his bicep, you very obviously squeeze the muscle there, and you let out a pleased sigh as you begin groping in earnest.
He wants to turn to hide his face in the pillow, not sure how to react to all the positive attention and appreciation, but you catch him trying to turn away, and you kiss him deeper.
While one hand begins to explore his pecs and abs, your other hand scratches down his v-line, softly caressing the skin of his inner thighs before moving around to squeeze his ass.
Wade rewards you with a small whine, and you carefully trail a finger down his dick. You move in to whisper in his ear, “You’re so hot, I’m not forgiving you for hiding for so long.”
Trying to stifle the embarrassing moan that he knows will come out, he bites down on his lip hard, but you take the hand not teasing his cock to gently pry his lip away.
“From now on, I get to hear you, okay?” you say and Wade nods rapidly.
You take the moment you wrap your hand around the base of his cock, and after giving him a second to ready himself, you ask, “I’m going to use it now. Tell me if you want to stop.”
“Okay–” he responds before he feels the sweet sensation of you jerking him off coupled with your power. It’s a humming, dull feeling of pain resting in the background– almost like the sensation of being choked except it’s affecting his entire body. Wade feels like there’s a weight pinning down each of his limbs and it’s so freeing– so relaxing.
He sighs and turns his head to the side, letting out a deep moan when you up the pace of your hand and bring the other to fondle his balls.
“How is it?” you ask, sweat dripping down your brow at trying to control your ability. Sure, it’s  powerful and at times pretty horrifying, but Wade always loved how he was essentially immune. At the same rate you could destroy the flesh around you, he could heal his own right back. Just knowing that made him feel good, somehow, like he was made perfectly for you.
“It’s good– so good, I–” he nearly shouts, forgetting about the neighbors.
“Yeah, baby? What do you need?”
At hearing the pet name, he straight up whines as he tries to bury his hands in the sheets instead of his own thighs. 
“Not sure, umm, a little more–”
And he doesn’t know which god he has to thank for putting you on this planet, but he’s willing to pay them all a visit. You read him like he’s not some mess, some walking disaster nobody bothers paying attention to, and you give him what you know he needs.
From the base of his chin, you drag your hand in a deep scratch across his neck, chest, and stomach, your eyes watching the pink lines blend in with his scarred skin. It’s a flashing pain, sharp like being scalded and it feels so good mixed with the blunt feel of being under your power.
“I’m gonna–” he says, and of course, you seem to already know. He cums with a deep grunt, rutting his hips into your fist before he thrusts his head forward to kiss you again.
As soon as he comes down, he pulls away only slightly, just so he can say what he’s been wanting to say since he met you.
“Thank–”
You cut him off with another kiss, because sometimes, he really does need to shut up. 
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avocado-writing · 1 month
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pairing: logan howlett x afab!reader. 18+, minors dni. angst; smut (p in v unprotected sex; handjob - logan receiving; oral - reader & logan receiving). canonically bisexual reader. mentions of pregnancy attempts. dp+w movie spoilers.
synopsis: in the Void, after leaving the other dead in your own timelines, you and Logan are reunited.
words: 8.5k.
notes: this was inspired by not your man by @studioghibelli and the worst logan by @coweye! please go and read both these fics and show their authors some love, they are both incredibly talented writers who deserve it! dividers by @saradika-graphics 💕
The past couple of days have been a lot. 
To be honest, anything that isn’t sitting at a bar drinking the place dry is a lot to Logan nowadays. He’s used to low lights, rumbling conversation around him, the fuzzier end of consciousness. Even now he aches for a drink, knowing he’ll have to wake up sober next to the asshole in red he spent the night putting down in that fucking minivan. 
He hopes, at least, he has been met with all the surprises that this place can afford him. 
Ah. But that’d be too fucking easy, right?
That Cajun bastard’s liquor sits comfortably in the cradle of his palm and he chases away lucidity one swig at a time. Tries to block out the half-baked plan Wade is concocting with the other poor bastards who have been stuck here, even if it’s all probably pointless. He only chimes in to laugh at their hope. 
Then Elektra turns, withering pity in her eyes, and seems to properly assess him for the first time. 
“They’re gonna be so disappointed when they see you.”
“Who?” he snorts, past the point of caring that he’d disappoint anyone. It’s then that Elektra hits him like a fucking freight train with just one word spilling from her lips: your name. 
Logan feels a flood of memories come back to him. Ones he’s spent too long trying to drink away. The early morning when you’d hide under the blankets together, your hand cradling his face and letting the whole world consist of just the two of you. The stolen kisses in quiet corridors so the students at the mansion wouldn’t catch you and start silly little rumours. 
Him holding your lifeless body in his arms surrounded by the rubble of what used to be your bedroom, your powers unable to save you. 
He doesn’t have anything to say, merely spitting vitriol to anyone who tries to speak to him, even that damn kid who still prefers the other dead Logan to him. Why wouldn’t she? He’s a fucking mess, worth less than nothing, and that Logan was a hero. 
He retreats in the evening to lick his wounds or, hopefully, drown them. People keep trying to fucking talk to him and he does not want it. Yet they’re fucking relentless, like the Void is perfect at creating gut punch after gut punch for him. Laura walks away into the darkness after successfully making him feel like shit - not that it’s difficult these days - and when he hears more footsteps he assumes it’s Wade coming to harass him about tomorrow. 
“Oh, will you fuck off - ?” he snarls, but the sight of you there, half lit by a dying fire with orange dancing on your skin, oh, it just kills any venom he can muster dead in his throat. 
Logan is looking at a ghost and he has never been less prepared for anything in his long, long life. 
Your mouth has fallen open into a soft “o” as you look at him, brows knitted together as you take in every imperfect aspect of his being. 
“Lo?” you whisper. Your voice hasn’t changed. 
“Logan,” he replies, gruff, unsure if he’s confirming or correcting. But fuck does it sound good to hear his name out of your mouth again, even if it’s just a syllable. 
You tuck a lock of hair behind your ear and take a seat on one of the logs which has been pulled up as a makeshift bench. He tries not to watch the way the fire lights up your eyes. There’s an agonisingly long pause before you finally attempt conversation.  
“Long time no see, huh?” you ask with a weak grin. Fuck. It’s like a dagger. Your humour was always something which endeared you to him. Unlike Wade you never took it too far, cultivating your sincerity with your silliness in order to grow yourself into peoples’ hearts. 
His heart especially, and now it aches. 
He grunts, because he can’t bring himself to actually say anything. Can barely look at you. You keep talking, either not noticing or barrelling on regardless. 
“You know, when the gang said that you were here… I didn’t believe it. Thought there was no way a fucking Wolverine would fall into this place.”
“Let me guess,” he sneers, taking another long drag of bourbon, “I’m not what you expected.”
You laugh, an easy little thing, and part of him hates you for it. For reminding him of how it sounds. 
“I mean, you’re not. But not because of what you’re thinking.”
“How do you know what I’m thinking?” It comes out as a snap, lip curling back over his teeth in disgust. You do not look bothered in the least, just crossing one leg over the other and leaning back. 
“Because I know you, Logan. Knew my Logan too. Bet you’re spiralling, making yourself out to be some kinda disappointment. Well you’re not. You could never be.”
He desperately wants to argue but he simply doesn’t have the gumption. Besides, it’s nice to hear someone say something kind about him after all these years. 
“So,” you say after another one of those painful pauses, “considering every time you look my way you wince, you have a me in your timeline?”
He laughs without any humour in it, stares into the flames for so long they start to hurt his eyes. 
“Yeah. I did.”
“Ahh. ‘Did’. I died, then?”
You say it so flippantly, he can’t fucking stand it. 
“Mmm.”
“Makes sense. Don’t think I’d leave you in any timeline, so the only way I could see us ending would be if I wasn’t there any more.” You sigh, stretching your legs out to warm them. “Can I ask how it happened? Call it morbid curiosity.”
He absolutely does not want to talk about this. But, also… it’s you. Maybe not the you that was his, exactly, but it is you. Perhaps you deserve to know. He tries to stay dispassionate, as if he is a doctor quietly recounting the facts of death to a family member. 
“Mansion was attacked. Everyone died, including you. I wasn’t there. We’d had a fight, I went out drinking. When I got back you were gone.” He flexes his fist around the neck of the bottle, trying to avoid shattering it, but desperately needing to hold onto something. 
“Oh.” The fire crackles loudly. “What did we fight about?”
This will kill him. He will die in this Void. 
“You wanted to do another round of IVF. I didn’t want to be disappointed again.”
The words settle like a cloud of choking ash over the two of you. He takes a long drink. What a fucking failure he is, couldn’t even knock you up properly. 
“Fuck, Logan. I’m so sorry.”
“Yeah.”
“Does it help if I tell you I probably wasn’t that mad? I’ve never been really angry with you, you know. My Logan… we used to bicker a lot, we both had short fuses, but it never meant anything in the long run.”
He doesn’t know if it does help or not. Is it better to know that you died hating him, making it easier? Or that you were snuffed out while loving him the whole time?
“Your turn,” he says, because he can’t bear to continue this particular line of conversation, but for some reason he wants to keep talking to you. Your voice is a comfort he thought he’d long since lost. 
“You wanna see a picture?” you ask, a grin pulling at the sides of your mouth. No, he doesn’t, but when you reach into your jacket to grab the photograph, he finds himself holding his hand out to take it. You slowly float it over, telekinesis absolutely unnecessary - but you always did use it to make the little things easier. 
It’s old. Frayed and disintegrating at the edges, a thing which has been held and looked at over and over again. Faded slightly despite the fact that you clearly try to take good care of it. 
“Oh,” he says, eyes widening. You chuckle. 
“I know.”
Because, despite the lack of facial hair and addition of a decent rack, the woman with her arm around you in the photo is him. 
The Logan in the picture is about as butch as they come, decked out in a Wolverine’s trademark flannel and leather. One of her arms is wrapped around you to keep you close against her, the other playfully flipping the camera off with a middle claw, and she’s laughing with a joy he hasn’t seen on his own face for years. You’re pressing a kiss into her cheek and hanging onto one of her thick biceps. The two of you exude happiness. 
“She was the best thing that ever happened to me. She could be a mean cunt sometimes, smoked like a chimney, drank like a fish, but fuck we were the centres of each other’s world.” You let out a long sigh and hold your hand out - Logan goes to give you the photo but instead you gesture for the bourbon. He passes it and you and you drink deeply, gratefully. “I’d been in a string of bad relationships. Guys who took me for granted, women who were toxic but I didn’t realise until I was in too deep. Then she came along and well… she was a fucking angel in plaid.” 
Logan’s thumb absentmindedly strokes the photo. He’s pretty sure there’s a near-identical one back in his timeline. 
“Our mansion was attacked too. She died getting the kids out.”
Fuck. Fuck. No, he can’t do this. He can’t face the way he should have died. He really is the fucking worst Wolverine. He snatches the bottle back from you, you give no resistance, and he polishes it off. The photo flutters to the ground. 
“I think it’s time you fucked off,” he growls out. You roll your eyes, fucking roll your eyes at him, something his version of you did on pretty much a daily basis, and the knife in his heart twists further. 
“Well, Logan, I’m not gonna do that. Because this conversation is the most whole I’ve felt in a long time, and I’m pretty sure you feel the same way.”
He doesn’t. He does. He wants you to disappear forever. He wants to hold you close and kiss you, beg you never to leave again. He hates you. He loves you so, so much. 
He’s such a ruined man that it is laughable. 
“So what, I come along and just replace your little girlfriend? First Wolverine that you manage to get your hands on; is that what you’re hoping for?”
You bark out a laugh. It echoes around the trees. There are tears in your eyes when he turns to look. 
“Girlfriend? Logan, you were my fucking wife!” 
It’s such a ridiculous thing to say that the laughter engulfs you, peals of giggles that double you over. You hold your head in your hands and it soon turns to bitter sobs. He wants to reach out and hold you, apologise for ever making you sad. He tries to get any lingering drops from the bourbon instead. 
“We got married at the mansion. Charles officiated. The kids made us cards. We didn’t get a honeymoon because we didn’t have the fucking time. We had five years. Five really happy years and you know what? We wanted a baby too. We were getting a donor lined up! And then when the attack happened you were the one getting all the kids out I begged you to come with us but you were too fucking good, you had to stay behind and make sure nobody followed us. And it cost you your fucking life. They ripped you apart Logan. I know because all I found of you was your head and your wedding ring. I didn’t even get time to mourn because I had a dozen children to fucking take care of! And I did because I knew that’s what you’d want me to do. It’s what you died for. So I lived in the fucking woods with all of them for years, and they were my family, and I made sure they were as safe and happy as I could make them. And you know what happened then? When they were all grown? A fucking TVA agent appears out of nowhere and tells me, ‘oops! Sorry! Your Logan wasn’t supposed to die, it was meant to be you!’ So they fucking throw me in this hellhole to rot away into nothing and I’m sorry, Logan, I’m sorry that when I heard you were here I got my fucking hopes up that you might be happy to see me, because if there was one person who understood all of the shit I’m going through then it might be you.” You throw your head back up to stare him dead in the eyes. “And it’s pathetic because you know what? Even after all this? I’m still not angry with you. I’m still happy you’re here. Because seeing you makes me feel better, despite everything.”
It’s a long-ass rant, and your words hang in the air after you’re done. He doesn’t know what to say. What can he say? He opens his mouth to apologise but the words just won’t come out. Because, yeah, if he really dissects himself and looks at the parts laid bare, he’s glad you’re here too. 
He reaches down to rescue the photo before an ember lands on it, gingerly extending into you. When you take it back his fingers brush yours. He wishes he wasn’t wearing gloves. 
“Who was the donor?” he asks eventually. That does a lot to alleviate the mood, and you smile through tear-streaked cheeks. 
“You might not like the answer.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, don’t tell me it was Scott.”
“The two of you got on okay! Butted heads a lot but he was always a good friend to us. Plus it was cheaper than going through an agency.”
He growls to himself and it makes you laugh, but properly this time. Things have started to soften and it’s… nice. To be like this with you again. You pause for a moment, stuck on whether to ask a question; hesitate over whether it’s a good idea, then barrel on regardless. 
“Can I ask a weird question?”
“You’re dangerously close to sounding like Wade,” he replies. You groan at that idea. 
“Ugh. Fucking Deadpools, man. We get one come along every now and then and trash the place before fucking off again. Apparently there’s like, a tribe of them out there somewhere.” You give a full-body shudder. “Imagine. No, it’s nothing like that, I guess. Can you… can you take off your glove? Left one.”
He has a horrible feeling about this but when you ask so nicely, that air of vulnerability around you, well it just seeps into his fractures and breaks him open. It takes a moment but he does, flexing his bare hand in the cool air. 
You reach around your neck and pull at a thin chain he’d barely noticed. The ring at the end slides up from where it’s been resting on your sternum under your shirt, glinting as you remove it. 
“Give me your hand.”
This is a bad idea. 
He does anyway. 
You slip the ring on his fourth finger, softly twisting it to fit over his knuckle as you go. It is the perfect size. 
“Will you look at that,” you mumble, not releasing your grip on him. “She… you always told me your hands were kinda big because of the claws. Like I cared. One of my favourite parts about you.”
Your fingers trace along his, finding the spaces between them and gently slotting your hands together. Logan isn’t sure if he’s the one who closes the grasp or if it’s you, but a beat passes and suddenly you’re holding hands. 
He’s not done this with you for so fucking long. An age of aching which is relieved at the feeling of your palm up against his. 
“So now what?” he eventually has to ask. You smile. 
“Well, I mean, your Deadpool is probably gonna get us all killed tomorrow…”
“Ugh. Don’t call him ‘my Deadpool’.”
“… so I’d quite like to just spend tonight holding your hand, if that’s okay. Seems like a pretty nice final night to me.”
When you hit him with those soft eyes, what other fucking choice does he have?
You don’t speak much for the rest of the night. Eventually the fire dies out. Laura comes to seek you out the next morning, and is surprised to find you lying side by side with this other Logan, the most deeply asleep she’s ever seen you, fingers laced together so tightly with his it looks like it might hurt. 
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He comes to the fight, of course; dredging up what little courage he has left in him in order to prove he’s not totally pathetic. You catch his eye and smile so wide that he feels likes he’s done at least one good fucking thing in his life. He hears the sound of you ripping into people with an enthusiasm he hasn’t witnessed for years. The last glimpse of you he gets before he jumps through the portal is you using your telekinesis to tear a man’s head off and he does not want to examine himself too closely when it sends a jolt of arousal down his spine. 
They leave you all there to face the end, but everyone knew that’s what you were all getting into. There has been a net gain and loss of nil. He never had you again. Not really. Not for anything longer than a night, and maybe that will be enough. 
Yes. That’s enough. It has to be. 
When he tells Wade he’ll go into that room, when he volunteers to die, he does it with the knowledge he’ll be doing something good, finally. Something you’d be proud of him for doing. And with you waiting for him on the other end of oblivion it really doesn’t seem too bad a fate. 
But then Wade does what he always does and fucks up his perfectly meticulous plan, and they both make it through, so he has to keep going. 
When Wade asks the TVA agent to help the group of you they left behind, Logan is sure to add on that people should get the opportunity to go back to their timelines - surely it’s what you’d want (this oddly selfless request has Wade raising an eyebrow which he ignores). After all, why wouldn’t you want to go back? It’s where you belong. Where you’ll be happiest. Putting things nice and neatly back into their place after this whole fucked-up venture. 
He doesn’t have you, but he’s still alive and wants to be, and that’s something. A lot more than he’s had for a long time now to be honest. 
His life becomes this strange little thing that’s wrapped up with Wade’s. He sleeps on his pull-out sofa until he has somewhere proper to put down his roots. Tries to lay off the booze as much as he can even if each day is a fucking struggle. Makes steps towards finding a proper place for himself; even gets a job on the door at the bar across the street. It’s okay. One step at a time. He can put himself back together like that. 
Imagine his surprise, then, when a week later there’s a knock at the door. 
He assumes it’s Al who’s forgotten her keys, or is too drunk to fish them out of her purse after bingo, so opens it without really thinking. 
The second time you’ve nearly stopped his heart in seven days. 
“Hey,” you say. 
“Oh,” is what he can manage. You tuck a lock of hair behind your ear. Your go-to. 
“Yeah. Sorry. I uh, followed you back, I suppose. The TVA were gonna send me home but I asked where you were and when the answer was ‘here’, well… didn’t make sense for me to be any place else.”
He blinks at you. After a beat of silence he can tell you hate, no doubt wondering if your choice was the wrong one, he lifts his hand to cup your face. You stiffen for a second and then nestle into his palm. 
“You’re real,” he states. You press your hand to his. 
“I am.”
He pulls you into his chest and you are more than willing to come. He feels the way you bury yourself into him, nose first, remembering what he smells like. Your arms wrap around him so tight it’s like you’re scared he will disappear when it should be the other way round: if anyone is dreaming it’s him. You bothered coming here for him. You uprooted your whole life for it. 
He could hold you forever but the neighbours are nosy and the apartment is a mess. He presses his mouth close to your ear. 
“Wanna get a coffee?”
You pull back to meet his gaze. 
“I’d love that.” Your eyes drop and you pull a face. “Oh, uhh, you might wanna get changed first, though.”
He looks down and realises what shirt he’s wearing before letting out a groan, which gets you chuckling. 
“Wilson’s letting me borrow his shirts until my first paycheck comes in. Just to slum around the apartment.”
“Oh, so you’re not ‘employee of the month at the dick sucking factory’?” You ask, reading the slogan on his tee.
“No. Looks like Wilson won out over me.”
The fact he’s made a joke hangs in the air for a moment and you burst into laughter, real actual laughter, and it’s the most beautiful fucking thing he’s ever heard.
He grabs the only plain shirt Wade has left out, slices off the sleeves just because, and grabs twenty dollars from his roommate’s wallet. Soon enough you’re sitting in the little café near his building. The sky is grey and overcast, just threatening to rain but not quite bothering, and the two of you are tucked away in a corner table while Taylor Swift plays over the sound system. 
Logan does not like that he knows it’s Taylor Swift. This is what living with Wade has done to him. 
You watch him with affectionate eyes across the table, making sure nobody is paying close attention before using your telekinesis to stir the little metal spoon around in your latte. You nod at his mug. 
“You take coffee the same way as she did. Boring and black.”
Logan’s nostrils flare a little in a laugh. 
“Yeah, and you take yours the same way too. So fucking dense with syrup that it’s not coffee at all.”
“Oh you were always such a coffee snob! ‘Babe you gotta try it plain first so you can appreciate the aroma’,” you say, putting on a gruff affectation as a parody of his voice. 
“You do need to try it plain f—”
He’s interrupted when a sugar lump floats into the air from the pot in the middle of the table and launches itself at him, bouncing off of his pectoral. He cocks an eyebrow. 
“Real mature, bub.”
“Grouch.”
“Contrarian.”
“I’m not a—” you pause, realising there’s no way to win against that accusation, and grin at him instead. 
“Where are you staying?” he asks after a long drink. It’s not booze. He kinda wishes it was booze. But also, he knows it’s best not to go down that path again, for everyone’s sake.
“The mansion. Turns out I died in this timeline too, so you and I are two for two here” - there’s a hint of a smile at your own macabre observation - “but they were using my room for storage so they just let me have it back.” You grimace a little. “It’s been weird. It’s my space but it’s not, y’know?”
“I get that.”
He probably gets it better than anybody. Nice to have someone to share this strange, singular feeling with. 
“You should come around. Laura’s there too, I know she’d be glad to see you too.”
“She settling in okay?”
“Yeah. It’ll take a while, but everyone has been really understanding and kind. I think she’ll thrive here.”
“I’m glad to hear that.”
You give him a smile that lets him know you believe it. Your eyes cast over him, taking in this new, slightly more settled Logan, falling still when you see what’s pressed against his fourth knuckle. 
“You’re still wearing the ring.”
“Oh,” he replies, surprised. Flexes his fingers as he looks at it. It’s been so comfortable there, so utterly unobtrusive and right, he hasn’t even noticed. “You want it back?”
A beat passes as you consider the question. Coffee is sipped. Another sugar added and stirred, perhaps just for show. 
“I don’t know,” you settle on. “I kinda like seeing you wear it but… if you were gonna have my ring, I’d want it to be one that was meant for you.”
He lets that idea settle between the two of you. Suddenly, slowly, you’re reaching forward, laying your smaller hand over his thick, rough one. 
“Logan. I want to be with you. In every way you’ll have me, all of it. I don’t know if it was fate or god or plain luck that threw us back together but I’m certain I don’t wanna waste this opportunity. I’d love you in every lifetime, in every timeline. I can’t be without you ever again, I think it would just kill me - and if I know you, you feel the same.”
He doesn’t even bother arguing because he does. When you turned up on his doorstep a scant couple of hours ago a part of his soul had been healed; your existence like kintsugi to piece him back together. A man made of adamantium and gold. 
“I’d like that,” he manages. 
“Yeah?” Your eyes glimmer with a hope which he’s not been privy to for a long time now. 
“Yeah.”
“Well, okay then,” you say with a smile, and drink your coffee. 
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The two of you do not take it slow. How does one take it slow when your soulmate comes back into your life? You are not exactly the same person he once knew, but you understand each other in every way which matters. Your souls fit together like puzzle pieces. The two of you are whole again. 
Then again, perhaps he doesn’t need the version of you he used to have. Maybe, now, he needs this you - rougher around the edges, a little older and more wary, a fit which is better for him. Someone who can put up with his bullshit as Al once bluntly put it. 
You barely spend a night apart. You stay over with him on Wade’s pullout (inciting an input of, “something the two of you had better do, we can’t afford a kid on my income—!” before Logan had hurled a water bottle at him) meeting up with him after his shift is done in the small hours, getting something to eat at one of the greasy spoons which remain open. He devours full plates of fatty food; you stick to slices of pie which you feed him bites of from your fork. When you get back to the apartment you cuddle up on the uncomfortable mattress which folds from the sofa and fall asleep in each other’s arms. 
He sleeps pretty well nowadays. 
The two of you only realise you haven’t kissed yet when you do it for the first time. You’re making a coffee run, tugging on his jacket because you like the smell of cigar smoke and it’s thicker than yours. A little act of intimacy which has become commonplace. 
“Same as usual?” 
“Mm-hm.”
“Boring,” you make an exaggeration of a sigh, before leaning over the back of the sofa to press your lips to his. He automatically leans into it, tilting his head up so that he can meet you; it’s a chaste little thing, a peck between two people who will only be parted for a moment, but you pull back in surprise when you realise what’s just happened. 
“Oh!” you say with delight, eyes sparkling.
Your hand slips around his neck to cradle him, fingers playing with the hair at his nape. You gently pull him back for another. Longer this time. Lips slip together, moving carefully in something a little deeper. When you break for a moment it’s Logan who pulls you back. This third kiss is on the brink of hungry. He slides his tongue to swipe against your mouth and you let out a happy little hum at the intrusion. 
His arm curls around your back. With a little tug he pulls you over the back of the sofa and into his lap, making you yelp with glee. His mouth returns to yours, crushing, greedy for any little noises you’re able to make. You relax into it and are happy to take whatever he gives you. 
Wade finds you making out on the couch like a pair of teenagers, coffee forgotten. He does not let Logan live it down for a week. 
The apartment is fine, but not a long term solution. Wade and Al are constant presences that stops the two of you being fully at ease together. Logan knows that invitation to go to the mansion is always there, but it’s a while before he takes it - he really isn’t sure what he’ll feel, being back at a place he last saw burned to the ground because of his pigheadedness. Might just break him all over again. 
But ah, when you nock your fingers in the spaces between his, he can face anything. 
One night, exhausted and full of diner food, he agrees to go back to yours - the two of you have had a late night coffee meaning you’re still a tiny bit buzzed, a little too much to fall asleep on the pullout. Instead you get a taxi to yours, near enough, tipping the driver well when he drops you in the middle of a random street and choosing to walk the last minutes hand-in-hand.
The mansion is quiet. Everyone is mostly asleep. And Logan does feel strange being back here, but it isn’t a bad strange. Just another aspect of this new life he has to compartmentalise. 
You drag him through low-lit halls, confident in the steps which will lead you back to your room; he recalls a similar journey from his own timeline in the night you first hooked up, smuggling him to your bed down the corridors all wandering hands and breathless kisses and giddy giggles; but there’s no part about you that wants to hide this. 
You’d show your Logan off to the world. 
You’ve tried to make the room your own, he can tell. It’s pretty big and spacious. Good view. Has an ensuite which he plans on monopolising. He shucks off his clothes and sleeps in just his boxers, arms holding you to him so he can feel every part of your body against his. His chest hair bristles between your shoulder blades and you hum contentedly. 
He agrees to come to breakfast the next morning and, to their credit, people are good at not staring. The members of the team he recognises from his past keep their distance unless he seeks to close it. Hank gives him a smile. 
“Good to see you, Logan.”
“Mmm,” he manages. Laura comes down to grab something to eat and lights up when she sees him. She gives him a hug which skews on the side of awkward but he’s grateful to receive it, and he can see how pleased you are watching this development. 
He comes around more and more often. 
Less time spent at the apartment with Wade - who constantly complains about the fact and Logan cannot tell if he’s sincere or not - more living in the pocket of you. He helps you sort out the furniture in the room so that there’s more space; you’re moving a chest of drawers to another corner together when a photo falls out from behind them. Trapped against the wall for years. Long forgotten. 
“Oh,” you say, lifting it up and bringing it to your hand with a wave. Your face twists into something strange and bittersweet, a mask Logan isn’t quite sure how to comprehend, but he quickly understands why when he joins you. 
It’s a picture of the two of you. 
Not exactly the two of you, of course; the ones of you who lived in this timeline. Logan is posing on the back of his Harley, you’re propped up on the seat next to him with your head thrown back in laughter. The two of you look… young. This must have been taken when you first started going out. 
Your thumb caresses the photo in a movement he’s familiar with. 
“Huh. Looks like we were together here, too. Who’da thunk it,” you mutter.
He slips an arm around you then because he’s feeling oddly sentimental. It’s reassuring. No matter what timeline it is, there’s a you who loves him and a him who loves you. A simple and irrefutable truth, like the fact that the sun rises every day or the moon moves the tides. 
“Apparently Magneto got me in the late noughties. Feels like a bit of a pathetic way to go, but diverging timelines, I guess.”
Logan knows that in this timeline, he stuck around for a while after. Poor bastard, he thinks. Having to live those years without you. That’s a misery he understands all too fucking well. 
But not any more. 
You leave the photo on your dresser, loathe to throw it away, and continue moving furniture to make room for the TV you just bought. Logan hates sharing the one in the living room, especially when the hockey’s on.
Eventually Logan is spending so much time with you he’s barely living at Wade’s any more. You’ve suggested they’d be happy to have him back in the mansion for a “teaching job” like you have, though he knows there’s never much teaching involved, more helping kids learn to defend themselves without too much collateral damage. Still it’s a fair chunk of change better than his current miserable doorman’s salary and it means he’d be living at more sociable hours.
Plus he’d get to move in with you, an idea you’re both secretly happy about. 
So he hands in his notice at the bar and packs the scant few belongings he has at Wilson’s into a cardboard box from Bad Dragon, which is strangely the only one Wade could find him (“god Peanut that’s so weird, oh well!”). Looks around the apartment he’s called home for some time, feels not entirely pleased to be leaving it. 
“And remember sweetie, if it all goes incredibly wrong and you realise the place you’ve belonged the whole time is on my undoubtedly piss-soaked pull out sofa bed, Al and I will be happy to have you back with minimal taunting.”
Logan fixes him with a look. 
“Wilson?”
“Yeah?”
“Thanks.” The word is odd coming from his mouth but not insincere. Wade goes to say something that’s no doubt stupid and inappropriate, however he softens at the last moment. 
“Any time. Go get ‘em, tiger, I’m rooting for you.”
You’ve moved your stuff so he can have a side of the closet, and drawers in the dresser, and he resumes his life with you. 
It takes only a couple of days for him to settle and realise how much he prefers this. Living with you properly. How, really, he couldn’t stand to be apart from you. How he wants to be there for every second, hear every laugh which drips from you, comfort you whenever something threatens to ruin your happiness. 
He falls asleep with you wrapped in his arms every night. Wakes up with you there. Pretty fucking perfect if you ask him. 
There’s nothing special about the morning when you first make love except for the fact it’s the morning when you first make love. It’s a border the two of you haven’t quite crossed yet. Almost as if you’re both afraid to make the commitment, like it may break you apart; there’s perhaps an underlying fear that you’re being unfaithful to your partners from your own timelines. That being together like that dishonours their memory. 
It’s a salve, then, that the longer you’ve been together the more you realise that you don’t love each other as a stand-in for the ones who died, but entirely on each other’s own merits. He doesn’t look at you and see the body he held in the manor. He sees someone who he’d protect, give his life to, become a dog for because he’s utterly in love with this you, the one who was so happy to find him in the Void, the one who patched him back together when he was at his most broken. 
There’s nothing to second guess in this relationship. It is the most solid foundation he’s ever had, and from the way you look at him every morning as if he’s hung the stars, you feel the same. 
That morning he’s holding you particularly tight. It’s a Sunday, the quietest day at the mansion, and the two of you are in bed later than you’d usually be. You’re both awake because you’re pressing more and more into each other’s bodies, nestling together like nesting dolls. His arm slung around your waist, hips against the swell of your ass. 
You shift slightly and he feels his cock harden in interest. Why wouldn’t it? Most beautiful person in the whole world right here in his bed. He might be old but he’s not a fool. 
He’s aware your hips are moving again, pressing yourself into him harder. He lets out a quiet, gruff laugh. 
“You’re doing that on purpose.”
“Mmm, maybe I am, Howlett. What are you gonna do about it?”
You squeak with laughter as he surges upwards, pinning your hands to the mattress either side of your head so that he can look down at you. Such a pretty picture beneath him. Hair all fanned out, eyes sleepy and sexy, ready to take in the syrupy-slow pace of the morning. 
His lips press into yours softly but firm. You hum into the kiss, slipping your wrists from his grasp so that you can wrap your arms around his broad neck and tug him closer. Your legs slowly match pace, looping at his waist. His cock is free to press against your clothed core now and he doesn’t waste a second of the opportunity; he grinds down, never letting it distract from the kiss for a second, even smiling into it when he can feel the blunt head of his dick catch your clit. You gasp. 
“Logan…”
Oh yes, that’s it. That’s the voice. He could listen to you say his name a million times and it would still be the sweetest sound in the whole fucking universe. 
He kisses you again and again, getting more fierce now. Tongues slide together and you moan into his mouth. Teeth clack with the force of it. He wants every sense to be drowned in you. Your smell, your taste, your touch. You’re holding him so tightly it’s like you’re worried you’ll just float away from the bliss of it all.
He’d never let that happen. He’ll keep you right here in this bed, forever, if you’d let him. 
With a display of telekinesis he’s not expecting, Logan finds himself on his back. You stare down at him with wide, hungry eyes, and he’s never been more turned on in his entire life. 
“Can I suck your cock?” you ask breathlessly, and he finds himself huffing out a laugh because fuck, as if you’d ever have to ask. You take his meaning and giggle before you start to make your way down the plain of his chest. A kiss dropped on the top of his pectoral, followed by you moving that sweet mouth around one of his nipples to play with it. Logan huffs and arches into your touch like a schoolgirl. You use your teeth to continue the trail, tracing around his abs - which have become less pronounced ever since he started eating right, and you’ve often expressed your pleasure at this fact - mouthing at where his muscles shape his Apollo’s belt. 
Your hand goes to palm his cock through his boxers and he has to make a concentrated effort not to come. It’s been a while since he was touched properly like this, and though he used to be able to go all night when he was a younger man, he truly doesn’t know if he has it in him today.
You seem delighted by this development though. Holding his gaze you slowly drag his waistband down to his thighs, watching in delight as his cock bobs up, half-hard. You take him in hand and pump him lazily, languidly, enjoying every stroke which makes him firmer. You prop yourself up on your free arm, elbow on the mattress and palm cradling your jaw, eyes on him like he’s the show of the century.  
“Handsome, handsome, handsome man,” you sigh, dreamily. 
“Old man,” he chuckles. 
“Not mutually exclusive.”
He has to concede that with the way you’re looking at him like you might eat him alive.  
When he feels your mouth around his cock his brain almost short-circuits. It’s warm and wet and willing, your tongue gliding along the thick vein you find there before caressing his head. Logan grunts, fisting the blankets, and a familiar snik has you looking up. You grin around his shaft when you see his claws have popped out from the intensity of his gripping hands. 
Pleased, you continue with your work. You bob up and down as the fire builds in his belly, a low heat which is soon bubbling over when he feels you press the tip of your tongue into his slit, humming with pleasure as the taste of his pre floods you. Logan is aware he’s beginning to tighten in a way which suggests that if you don’t stop now things will be over entirely too soon.
Claws retracting, his hand comes to grab your hair. His cock is enveloped in the sweet velvet of your throat, in fact he can feel himself brush against your uvula, and when you look up at him like that he almost gives up completely. He powers through though, carefully guiding you up and off. You wipe your spit-soaked mouth with the back of your hand. 
“Oh… was it not…?” you don’t voice the word ‘good’ but it hangs there anyway. Logan rumbles with a laugh.
“Fuck, it was the best thing I’ve felt in years. Wanna fuck you properly, though. Come up here and sit on my face, baby. Need to taste you.”
Your eyes go wide. Like he’s come up with the idea of the century.
“Fuck. Yeah, okay.”
There is nothing elegant about the way you pull yourself up the length of his body, but it is filled with a primal need which is far more sexy. You pause at his abdomen in order to rub your soaked cunt across his abs a couple of times. Fucking the muscles there. You throw your head back in gratification and continue up along his chest before a strong thigh is planted either side of his face.
Looking up at you from his back is his favourite view. Logan wastes no time in clamping an arm around either one of your legs and pulling you cunt-first onto his tongue, you gasp and writhe in delight.
“Oh fuck, Logan!” you hiss. Yeah, that’s it. That’s the voice he wants to hear. All strung out with sex and pleasure because of him. He fucking buries himself in you. Kisses your pussy sloppily, changing his attention from between your clit and your folds, no rhythm to his need. When your fingers scratch his scalp in your need to grab a fistful of hair he thinks he might be in heaven. His hips buck into the air, imagining the action of taking you before he’s even properly started. You start to fuck yourself on his face. Hips grinding down onto his beard, groaning at the stubble there which prickles and pleases.
“I’m gonna--”
“Fuckin’ do it,” he mumbles from between your legs. You cum in his hot, wanting mouth; all the furniture in the room rattles as you let out a little involuntary telekinetic jolt.
You are not done. This was the appetiser. Eyes still ravenous you peel your pussy off of his face, sweeping down to kiss him so you can taste yourself there. Moaning in delight at the musk.
“Wanna ride you…”
“Anything,” he breathes because, yeah. He will do anything you ask, anything you want. He’s a loyal hound at your heel. 
When you take his cock it’s with less teasing this time, more intent. Spreading your legs wide you line him up with your entrance and slowly sink down. He wants to grab. Your flesh, the blankets, anything. Sensing his desperation you hold out your hands when he’s far enough inside you and he meets them in midair, pressing his fingers between yours, knuckles white from the effort.
Hips nestle against his. You begin to move.
“Logan…” 
Your name leaves his lips in a similar whisper, dragged out through his throat from his very heart. You look down at him, eyes clear and wide and lucid despite the heady pleasure.
“Logan. I love you. I love you.”
Yes, you love this him. Not as a stand in for the Logan you lost, not as some sort of idol on a pedestal, but because you’ve fallen for him just like he’s fallen for you. He is worth loving. He is. He is worthy of you. It is a realisation which hits him with the force of a bomb. He grips you tighter.
“I love you too,” he confesses. He feels his pulse sync with yours from where he’s sheathed inside you, grips your hands tighter because he knows you can take it; you hold him back just as hard. Your hips rock in a wild rhythm as he brings his own up to meet them. It’s hard to know who’s fucking who, it’s wild and desperate and raw, but you keep chanting those words as a manta.
Logan. I love you. Logan. I love you.
He only lets go of one of your hands when he can feel he’s about to finish, dropping it to your clit in order to press rough circles there. You come messily over his cock and he spills inside you, pumping you full of him. Marking you as his.
You collapse into his arms, sweaty and spent. He holds you with arms like iron. Cock still inside, softening now, but he doesn’t want to to break the contact.
You pull back after a moment of breathing together, propping your elbow on his chest.
“Hey.”
He smiles back, a real smile, something he’s not been truly able to produce for years.
“Hey.”
“I meant it, you know. I love you,” you trace a pattern on his collarbone, silly and intimate. 
“I know. So did I.”
“Mmm, okay, good.” You kiss him and hum into it. “We should get up.”
“Probably.”
“But let’s not.”
“Sounds fuckin’ good to me.”
You laugh, and oh you are the sunlight. 
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The summer heat is cloying but Wade has set up some parasols on the top of his building to hide under, he did not specify where he got them but a few local restaurants seemed to be without on the journey back to the apartment. The group of you are definitely not meant to be up here, but with the weather so hot, nobody cares enough to cause a fuss. 
It’s a small gathering. Logan stands at the grill because it’s where he’s most comfortable, supervising the chaos. That awful mutt of Wade’s is looking up at him with expectant eyes and, when he’s sure nobody is watching, he throws her a hamburger which she goes crazy for. 
And it’s… nice. He didn’t even complain when Wade put on the 1989 album. A few of his old roommate’s friends, a couple of them now mutual - Piotr is a pretty relaxed guy to be in the mansion with, and the two teens who Wade somehow befriended get along with Laura. You’re talking with Peter who for some reason is always at these gatherings but he’s probably the least offensive person here. 
He says something which makes you laugh, and you look over to Logan as you both settle. You gesture at the bottle of soda in your hand, an invitation; he nods. 
You stand, rummage in the cooler, and close the gap. He eyes the glass bottle of Dr Pepper with disapproval; you give him a playful shove. 
“C’mon, be good. You just got your one month chip. Keep it up, we’re proud of you.”
He grumbles his acceptance and takes it. It is pretty refreshing to be fair. He settled the hand he’s not using on the grill around your waist, pulling you so that you settle nice and snug against his flank. You grin up at him, pleased with the show of affection.
“Hey handsome,” you chuckle. 
“Hey gorgeous.”
“You make me the happiest I’ve ever been, you know that?”
Day by day he’s letting himself believe it. That he’s the kind of man who could make someone as amazing as you happy, as over-the-moon with joy as you make him. 
Before he can answer Yukio appears by the grill, pointing a Polaroid camera in your faces. 
“Smile!” she says, and the two of you do, because she’s a nice kid and you don’t wanna let her down. She snaps a photo and watches it quickly develop, shaking it loudly in the air before admiring her work. 
“Awww, cute! I hope me and Ellie are like you guys when we’re your age. Here ya go!”
She passes over the photo before skipping away to find her next victim. Logan has to try and hide a laugh at the indignant splutters that are escaping you. 
“Our age…?!” you mutter, but soften when you look down at the picture. It’s nice. The two of you make a good-looking pair that’s for damn sure, he can almost understand Wade’s insistence of “letting him watch one night”. But most importantly, the two of you look… happy. With each other. With this slice of life. 
“This is a great one,” you declare. 
“Yeah,” he says, but he’s looking at you. 
When you get home tonight, late by the time you pull up to the mansion, you’ll toe off your shoes as you walk in through the door like you always do, but this time you’ll pause to put this photo in front of the one you found behind the chest of drawers, and Logan will feel content that he never has to be without you again. 
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taglist: @falsewordz @malfoys-demigod @belilwen @mildly-salted @tvwebs @childeslegstrap @getmeoutofhell @s1eep-o @just-a-beatlemaniac69 @yrthr @momopad @sugarplumz100 @captainjinkx @madspads @acrosstheunivcrse @yeethaw13 @na-is-salty @florduarte @hunterispunk
1K notes · View notes
candiehearts · 1 month
Text
“He’s My Person.”
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Paring: Hugh Jackman x Actor F!Reader
Summary: You and your co-star Hugh Jackman are in the eye of the public. Your fans always loving the dynamic between the two of you. However no one knew if you would be anything more than friends, not even you.
- oneshot, Hugh Jackman M.List, Navigation — other works!
Warnings: None!
Taglist: Just ask to be added.
I walked past the camera set crew, and smiled when I saw Hugh sitting in one of the chairs. The Aussie immediately stood up, and gave me a hug.
Today was the first, of many interviews for the press tour of X-Men Origins Wolverine. I had been so lucky to get a part in this film, and I loved filming every second of it.
The lights dimmed a little, and focused on us and the cameras started to roll.
“Welcome, welcome you too.” I smiled at her and did a little wave to the camera. “First I would like to say congratulations on your achievement in making this film.”
“Thank you, that’s really sweet.” I could feel red lightly forming on my cheeks at the praise while Hugh — like the professional he is, take the compliment like a champ. “Thank you, much appreciated.”
“Now we have a bit of a game set up for us to do, but first some questions.”
Oh gosh, I could feel slightly nervous, but Hugh placed his palm on my knee and slightly rubbed it with his thumb. Calming my nerves.
“Now Hugh, you’ve done X-Men for quite some time now, but Y/N this is your first time in the Marvel franchise.”
Hugh squeezed my knee slightly, and gave me a proud smile while he rested his chin on his other hand.
“Yes well it’s such an honor.” I couldn’t help but feel a tiny nostalgic when I remembered how I started my career and where I’m at now. “I had done some small films before, but nothing like this. It was truly a one of a kind experience.”
I was expecting for another question, but Hugh spoke up as well. “Not to mention Y/N is such an amazing actor — and she’s always fun to work with. She’s a very good sport when things don’t go right the first time.”
I couldn’t help the laugh that sounded like a giggle leaving my lip, a smile brightening my face.
“Careful Hugh I might think you’re flirting with me.” I wouldn’t mind that, and this teasing, flirting thing we do is something we’ve always done since we first met each other.
“You two are adorable.” The interviewer — Annie — commented. “What was your favorite thing to film.”
Oh god, this is a trap. The movie hasn’t hit theaters, and there’s only so much we can say before it comes out.
I slapped my hand over Hugh’s, “kissing Hugh Jackman.” That little bit was in the trailer — so it’s the safest thing to say, if not the honest.
Hugh didn’t his cute little laugh, a snort breaking free, before he regained his composure.
“I won’t lie, I 100% messed that scene up so I could just kiss the wonderful Y/N again. So I’ll have to agree with her there.”
My face started to warm in embarrassment while I hid inside my hands, all while Hugh laughed — his hand never leaving my knee.
“Do either of you have a date to the premier? If yes, then do you mind saying?”
My response came so quick out of my mouth I didn’t have a moment to process what I was saying, though that’s how I am a lot of the time. “Hey, Hugh, wanna be my date?” 
Hugh looked at you, and despite his smile, and the humor in his voice — his eyes were laced in seriousness. “It would be the greatest honor of my life, to walk down that carpet on your arm like eye candy.”
I blew him a kiss, teasing him before looking right back at the camera. “I might look fine right now, but trust me girls I’m screaming on the inside.”
The whole camera crew started to laugh, while I silently laughed as well.
“In ten or words less describe each-other’s character.” I gestured for Hugh to go first to which he took a moment to think, using his fingers.
“Badass solider that always completes a mission no matter what.”
Fuck. Alright.
“A military solider that can’t die, infused with metal.” Fuck I need another word. “Handsome.”
“Aweeeee.” Hugh leaned over and kissed my cheek.
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The sound of cheering was the only thing I could hear as I grabbed a hold of Hugh’s arm and made our way onto the carpet.
“God, what if I fall on my face?” I stopped just before my heel could meet with the carpet. Too nervous to go on.
“Y/N, you’re going to be okay. I won’t let you fall.” He laced his fingers with mine and walked us down the carpet, giving me the push I needed to get out of my own head.
The paparazzi photos started to flash immediately, blinding me but I had been used to this by now — so I just kept my focus.
Hugh leaned down to my ear, whispering a joke about how a photographer back would hurt tomorrow in that position, causing me to laugh.
The lights went crazy as he hugged laughed with me, “you look very beautiful tonight.”
“I might have to make you my date to every premier Mr. Jackman.”
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We made our way to the first reporter of the night, sticking close together.
“Good evening.” She was a pretty decidedly young girl, and you could see how nervous she was. “Hi/G’day.” Me and Hugh responded.
“So you two are each other’s date, any special chemistry going on.” The Aussie wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him, while I held his shoulder with my left arm. This position was suggestive, but it was teasing.
Unfortunately, to my disappointment we weren’t seeing each other.
“One day.”
One day.
You couldn’t help but give him a smile, and he returned it with the same exact emotion in his eyes. Care, and love.
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Over the next few years, you and Hugh had worked on a few projects together, but even if you weren’t, you and him always were close and kept in touch.
You would grab dinner together often, or sometimes when one of you were free and the other was busy on a set, it wasn’t strange that one of you would fly out to the other.
Everyone believed that one of you were together, especially after a video leaked of you and Hugh slow dancing at a house party together.
But whenever asked about it, you two would always either say, “not yet,” or “one day.”
You were having a premier coming up, and it was the only time that there was a chance that Hugh couldn’t make it. So everyone was wondering if you would bring anyone else. It was well known you didn’t like going places without someone close to you.
You sat with one of your co-stars and smiled at the interviewer that was asking the question on everyone’s mind.
“Are you sure you and Hugh Jackman are not dating.” You couldn’t help but laugh at the phrasing of her words.
“Hugh Jackman? Never heard of him.” The crew and your Co-Star started laughing, but you did answer the question. “No we’re not dating.” It was the first time the two of you were direct with it, and not being vague.
Overtime you grew to love Hugh, and to be honest you didn’t know if you could keep telling yourself ‘one day.’ Because in your head you two weren’t only giving fans false hope, but you were giving it to yourself.
“Hugh is away filming, you always take him to events, since he won’t be here will you take someone else.”
You were quiet for a moment, thinking through your answer.
“To be honest, even if I wanted to take someone else I don’t think I could.” You looked down to your lap before continuing. “Hugh is such a major part of my life. Really he’s my pillar. He will always be the one a I take, and if I can’t take him then I wouldn’t go with anyone else.”
“It sounds like you deeply care for him. Are you sure there’s no feelings?” She didn’t ask if you were dating, but if you had feelings.
“Hugh Jackman is so many things. He’s a great dancer, actor, singer. Full of so many talents — and I always love the fact that I am apart of his life. Because most of all He’s my person.”
You finally looked back up to the interviewer.
“If something were to ever happen between us, then it would have already.”
Sure you fans would be sad, and even you, but it was time to finally put the rumors to rest.
You were a little quieter through the rest of the interview, but still kept it fun.
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Hugh downed his drink. He was on a plane, flying back to you. He wore a tux so he could be on the ready to go so when he lands, he can confess, then they can make their way to the premier — where he can make it known to the world.
He was watching your interview, and when you put said that you two weren’t happening, he felt panic.
He cursed himself for waiting too long. But the truth was he felt like with his career going the way it was that maybe he wasn’t ready for a relationship. He was an idiot.
He felt terrible for leading you on so long, but he would make it right — and hope maybe you still liked him.
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By the time he finally landed you had just walked onto the carpet, alone. So he paid the driver extra to just step on the gas.
Once he was let in — the crowd started going wild. He was on the carpet, and he didn’t stop to take photos, or talk to people.
He set his sights on you and immediately started to hurry to you. And ironically it was like something from a movie.
The cameras all the sudden started going crazy, and you looked to your right to see what was going on, but was met with a Hugh Jackman out of breath, and grabbing your face.
“Hugh? When did—“ You were cut off by his lips pressing into yours. His hands gently leaving your cheeks, and resting on your neck while he pulled you closer.
You parted just a little, so he could whisper his confession to you.
“You’re my person too. I’m sorry for being an idiot, but I’m an idiot in love with you.”
A smile took over your face, finally your one day was today. “Just kiss me again, you bloody fool.” You didn’t need to tell him twice — and the camera was absolutely going crazy.
The rest of the premier, Hugh had a few lipstick stains on his face that he didn’t even bother to wipe away.
He was took focus on the smile that was on your face, the same smile that matched his.
The next day Hugh found a photo of you two kissing, with Ryan Reynolds shocked, smiling face, he immediately posted it, letting your fans know that your finally got together with the caption, “my person.”
You two also made that your locks screen and every time either of you are asked about your friendship with Ryan, you immediately talk about it.
© CandieHearts
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jo-com · 3 months
Text
୧ ‧₊˚ 💐⋅ ☆ ➛ You bagged that?
Lando Norris x Fem!Actressreader
Summary: Lando has seen everyone of your movies— from tv shows to random videos, he’s just so updated about you in everything it’s crazy, but what’s more crazy is him spreading that you guys are dating.
Genre: SMAU
Fc: Elle Fanning
Note: There are some grammatical errors to look out for!
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ➛ My Masterlist
─────── ─ ✉⋆˚。 ⋆୨୧˚─ ───────
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Liked by Landonorris and 3,901 others
No.1fFan_ Yn is an actual princess, i love her so much😍
Tagged; @Not_Yn
View all comments
Username1 SHE IS THE EPITOME OF ROYALTY 👸🏻
Username2 I love her movies sm🥹
Username3 BESTIE SAME!!
Username4 lando on likes??👀👀
Username5 uhm who?
Username6 some f1 driver whose been liking her for years
Username5 ohhh
Username7 he just likes every pic of hers ig🤷🏻‍♀️
Username8 I’VE SEEN HER IN PERSON, SHE’S SUPER NICE🥰
Landonorris Lucky😢😢
Username9 DHSHUSUWB LANDO😭
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Liked by louispatridge_, Landonorris, Netflix and 2,378,901 others
Not_yn I have two sides😚
View all comments
Landonorris love all ur sides!
Carlossainz55 Dream on lover boy😝
Landonorris Fuck off
Username10 lmao them fighting in the comments r so iconic
Username11 y/n not even giving a damn😭
Username12 HER BEING SO ETHEREAL IS EVERYTHING
Landonorris I AGREE😫
Username13 not lando being her no.1 fan
Username14 stalker much??
Username15 girl stfu, u do the same
Annehathaway why is ur comment sec always chaotic
Not_yn even I don’t know😭
Landonorris just posted!
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Liked by mclaren, and 12,378 others
Landonorris so pretty😍
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Username16 THE DELUSION😭
Username17 Y/n didn’t even like this
Username18 A+ for the confidence
Username19 WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ON HOW PRETTY SHE LOOKS
Landonorris real😢
Charles_Leclerc Dude…
Carlossainz55 Man…
Georgerussell63 🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️
Pierregasly Oh brother..
Username20 THEY HAVE MIXED FEELINGS😭
Username21 lmao the whole f1 attacking him
Username22 the whole gang came to shame him
Username23 yn being so unbothered😎
Username24 MY QUEEN FR🥰
➛ Messages
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Liked by 4,679 others
WAG.updates ACTRESS Y/N L/N WERE SEEN KISSING THE KNOWN F1 DRIVER LANDO NORRIS— The couple have been spotted together a few times already.
Tagged; @Not_yn, @landonorris
View all comments
Username25 oh…
Username26 we owe him an apology
Username27 LANDO DESERVES AN APOLOGY FROM ALL😭
Username28 nobody believed the poor man
Landonorris WHAT’S UP NOW BITCHES
Landonorris and they call me crazy🙄
Maxverstappen u still are😑
Landonorris Yeah..crazy right that is🤪🤪
Username29 gaslighting myself that this isn’t true
Username30 Y/n isn’t even in the likes must be fake
Username31 GIRL PLS LANDO ALR COMMENTED
Username30 doesn’t prove anything
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Liked by Landonorris, urbff, and 5,092,278 others
Not_yn wanted to soft launch but the jig is up
Tagged; @Landonorris
View all comments
Landonorris can finally say i love you without being judged😛
Not_yn my poor baby has been so much
Username32 NOOO MY HEART IS FOREVER BROKEN
Username33 welp good bye cruel world
Username34 they lowkey adorable ngl
Landonorris now u ship us🙄🙄
Username34 WE’RE SORRY😭
Charles_Leclerc we stand corrected
Carlossainz55 i know when to say sorry. Sorry
Username35 she’s so pretty💕💕
Landonorris the prettiest😁
Pierregasly aww lover boy
Landonorris fuck off
➛ Messages
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Loved this!!
1K notes · View notes
orionsangel86 · 2 months
Text
I watched X-Men 2000 tonight. Yup the Deadpool and Wolverine brain worms got me - at least for a little while - so I figured I'd rewatch the old movies that I havent seen in over a decade and have basically forgotten entirely at this point.
You know what really stunned me? Even more than the slow pace, serious tone, actual dedication to telling a coherent and interesting story with layers of meaning and social commentary attached to it, as well as a sincerity that's been missing from most superhero films since the MCU was born (thanks Josh Whedon).
Nope, what shocked me most was this:
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This is a perfect specimen of a man. Look at him. He's gorgeous. But look at his chest? His arms? He's muscular, he's pretty well toned, he's hairy. He's definitely got a six pack - but it's nicely covered by a healthy layer of fat. His skin is plump, he has a bit of squish to him. He'd probably be great to hug (Jean Grey certainly gives him a good squeeze lol).
When he sits down he looks like his stomach will roll just nicely. Like a stomach should.
I know my point here is obvious. It's just that scrolling the Deadpool and Wolvering tag is basically 50% "oh they definitely fucked in the Honda Odyssey" (yes lol) and the other 50% is just horny posting over Wolverine's topless scene like the entire site suddenly adopted Deadpools horny brain.
I gotta give props to Hugh Jackman for his dedication to turn himself into an actual comic book character - because that's what this new movie does. It gives us a comic accurate Wolverine in practically every way (except for his height lol) the suit is amazing, the cowl was a joy to see brought into live action. The body too though was straight out of a comic book artists male power fantasy.
What I wanted to emphasise was that this:
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Is extremely tough on the human body. What I wanna know is how long he starved and dehydrated himself for before filming this scene? How long before they shot this did he last drink some water? Because damn that must have been tough. The oil and the lighting probably help further emphasise the muscle, vein, and sinew definition. It's probably similar to how body builders prepare before a show.
Nothing about body building is healthy though. So in the coming weeks as the whole entertainment industry rides on the coat tales of this movies success, and everyone goes crazy over Hugh Jackmans physique, please don't feel pressured into thinking that his 2024 physique in the movie is remotely realistic - or realistically attractive. Like I get the fantasy sure, but come on. I'd personally rather lie on a cushioned bed than a concrete floor.
Deadpool may disagree with me, but he's a masochist lol.
Oh and whilst I stand by the shade I threw at the MCU above, I think Wolverine's different physiques in the movies is a good standard of comparison for how much superhero movies have changed. Because when superhero comics first started getting adapted I think a lot of the choices made were about how to bring them to live action realistically and believably and the attitude was to try not to make them look ridiculous. The first X-Men movies definitely do this.
It was about bringing the comics to life in a way that fit in our world. But over the years, as audiences got more and more used to comic book movies the movies became more and more like comic books and less like a realistic adaptation of a comic book. Does that make sense? So as the movies attempted to bring the comics to life in a way that was less realistic and more comic accurate, the demands on the actors to sculpt their physiques to meet the standards of comic book art became normalised.
I think Deadpool and Wolverine is the MOST comic book accurate of all superhero movies made in the past 2 decades. Half the time the images from the movie look like they could be literally pulled from the pages of the comic books. The story is convoluted and stupid, the plot is barely there and is full of gaping plot holes and elements that don't fit any past stories. The action is ridiculous, extremely fast paced, gratuitous, and violent to a hilarious level. But it's so entertaining, joyful, exciting, and laugh out loud hilarious throughout.
It reminded me a LOT of my attempts at reading through the Deadpool comics (I've read a lot of them but no where near all of them).
To sum up this rambling message with multiple points, I'll say that Deadpool and Wolverine is a really fun movie that I thoroughly enjoyed, but make no mistake there is nothing real in it at all. It is almost literally a comic on screen. Don't expect anything more than that and you'll enjoy the experience.
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thewispsings · 3 months
Text
locked in a closet | oscar piastri
pairing: oscar piastri x landos bestfriend!reader
summary: lando norris locks his two bestfriends in a broom closet in hopes that they’ll stop hating each other.
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liked by, oscarpiastri, yourusername, and 438,626 others!
lando.jpg: how can i get my bestfriends to stop hating each other?
view comments below!
oscarpiastri: you can’t.
lando.jpg: ☹️
oscarpiastri: you can pout all you want. We will never get along.
lando.jpg: why must you break my heart 💔
user1: it’s been a whole year lando…i don’t think they’ll ever get along
user2: NEVER SAY NEVER
user3: oscar this, lando that, can we talk about how good y/n looks?? 🙄
yourusername: THANK YOU!! nobody appreciates my beauty anymore 😒😒
oscarpiastri: what beauty?
yourusername: die?
user4: LMAOO
yourusername: maybe if, he who should not be named, wasn’t so annoying, we could actually get along!
oscarpiastri: i’m not fucking voldemort you can say my name
yourusername: o-os🤮c-ca🤮🤮🤮🤮 no i just can’t.
oscarpiastri: oh and i’m the annoying one??
yourusername: yeah! you are!
oscarpiastri: @/lando.jpg control her.
lando.jpg: guy please, can’t we all just get along 😞😞
yourusername: how would getting along with he who should not be named, benefit me??
lando.jpg: it would make me really really happy 😁😁
yourusername: i couldnt give less of a shit about your happiness lando
oscarpiastri: see? She’s a horrible friend, me on the on the hand would never be so mean to you.
yourusername: you told lando he looks like big bird two days ago?
user5: for two people who hate each other, they sure do talk a lot…
danielricciardo: why do they even hate each other so much? 🙄🙄
lando.jpg: oscar spilled his drink on y/n the first time they met. he refused to apologize. she refused to forgive him.
yourusername: you forgot to mention that my shirt was $300 😐😐
oscarpiastri: FIRST OFF who in their right mind buys a 300 HUNDRED DOLLAR SHIRT???!?!? and SECOND OFF, IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!!! I refuse to apologize for something that wasn’t on purpose.
yourusername: this is why your mom loves me more.
oscarpiastri: she does NOT.
nicolepiastri: …
oscarpiastri: MUM????
yourusername: i know that’s right.
user6: oscar and y/n would be so cute together if they stopped being so IMMATURE
user7: they should just #kissandmakeup
user8: me patiently waiting for the enemies to lovers 🧍‍♀️
user9: you’re going to be waiting a LONG time…
charles_leclerc: i think it’s time to give up on the idea them being friends mate 😢
lando.jpg: I SAY WHEN ITS TIME
user10: charles is just sick of getting caught in the crossfire 😭
user11: OMG IM NOT THE ONLY ONCE WHO NOTICES THAT ???😭😭😭
user10: NOO I DID TOOO!! it’s like every time oscar and y/n are having a glare-off charles somehow ends up right in between them
user11: AND THEN HE JUST STANDS THERE LIKE 🧍‍♂️
maxverstappen1: just lock them in a room and let them fight it out 🤷
lando.jpg: wait a damn minute…
yourusername: LANDO NO.
oscarpiastri: absolutely not.
— y/n has posted new photos!
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liked by, charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, alex_albon, and 502,528 others!
yourusername: p2, and now movie night in max’s movie theater <33
view comments below!
user12: cutting oscar out of the photo is DIABOLICAL WORK 😭😭
user13: oh to be y/n l/n :((
user14: y/n is literally living the DREAM
user15: the way y/n made SURE you could see that she cut oscar out of the photo
yourusername; i have no idea what you’re talking about ?? 😓😓
oscarpiastri: get off your phone and watch the movie 🙄
yourusername: stop staring and me and watch the movie 🙄
user16: clock it y/n!!!!!
landonorris: did you really have to crop out oscar?
yourusername: yes!
user17: landos trying so hard 😞
user18: they’re all having a movie night 😞😞😞 ??
user19: I SHOULD BE THERE 💔💔💔💔💔
maxverstappen1: this movie is so funny!!
yourusername: it’s brokeback mountain?
maxverstappen1: and it’s hilarious! 😂
user20: MAX WATCHING BROKEBACK MOUTAIN ??!?!??
user21: max thinking brokeback mountain is funny is so him??
charles_leclerc: this movie is so sad 💔💔💔
yourusername: yeah charles we all see you crying :(
user22: charles crying over brokeback mountain is SO HIM!!
user23: is everyone just in there phones during the movie?? 😭😭
oscarpiastri: nope! just she who should not be named 🤷
yourusername: the unoriginality is disgusting!!
maxverstappen1: i’m going to, as the kids say, expose everyone. @/oscarpiastri has not stoped staring at y/n all night.
maxverstappen1: @/yourusername hasn’t stopped staring at a photo oscar on her phone.
this comment has been deleted.
maxverstappen1: @/landonorris has eaten 2 whole pizzas.
maxverstappen1: @/charles_leclerc is crying like a baby.
maxverstappen1: @/danielricciardo keeps awkwardly laughing at the worst moments.
maxverstappen1: @/georgerussell63 keeps taking photos of his abs
maxverstappen1: @/lewishamiliton is secretly wiping away his tears
maxverstappen1: @/alex_albon has been whining about missing ‘his lily’ all night
maxverstappen1: @/carlossainz has gotten up to pee 10 times in the past HOUR
maxverstappen1: and @/logansargent has been hugging a teddy bear for the past 2 hours.
maxverstappen1: that’s what you ALL GET for not having MOVIE THEATER ETIQUETTE AND BEING ON YOUR PHONES.
yourusername: damn okay….
alex_albon: can you go get me my jacket in the closet? i’m kinda cold 🥶🥶
yourusername: yeah sure? 😭
user24: something’s brewing..i can feel it.
landonorris: @/oscarpiastri can you go get me my beanie in the closet? my ears are cold
oscarpiastri: yeah sure
— 3 minutes later!
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— 7 minutes later!
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— 2 hours later!
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— y/n has posted new pictures!
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liked by, oscarpiastri, landonorris, maxverstappen1, georgerussell63, and 629,628 others!
yn.jpg: max’s door didn’t stand a chance against MY muscles 💪(ft, jimmy the cat♡♡)
view comments below!
user25: oscar in the likes?????
user26: wait a minute…
maxverstappen1: don’t worry i won’t make you pay for it 😚
yourusername: you locked me in a room with oscar. i wasn’t paying either way.
maxverstappen1: FINE. 😒😒😒
user27: did she just…say oscar name?
user28: in the whole YEAR oscar and y/n have known each other, y/n has NEVER said his name WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON
user29: something happened in that closet
landonorris: hello, i am lando norris, and i would like to publicly apologize for locking my dear friends (especially yn) in a closet. it was stupid and inappropriate of me. i hope to gain back their forgiveness.
user30: did y/n make you do this?
landonorris: no… (yes pls help she’s locked me in my room and won’t let me out)
yourusername; i’ll let you out once you’ve learned your lesson.
oscarpiastri: nice kitty.
yourusername: thanks!
georgerussell63: um, what the fuck is this?
charles_leclerc: maybe management took over oscar’s account?
oscarpiatari: no? it’s me?
charles_leclerc: oh! then what the fuck is this?
user31: something DEFINITELY happened in that closet. why are oscar and y/n actually being civil????
landonorris: i don’t know but it’s scary.
yourusername: do i have to confiscate your phone too?
landonorris: no! Sorry i’m learning my lesson 😞
carlossainz: hahaha 😂lando is such a loser
yourusername: do i have to take your phone to carlos? 🤨
carlossainz: NO, no i’m sorry 😔
user32: is it finally happening?…the enemies to lovers we all wanted 💔💔
user33: your telling me landos plan actually worked and y/n and oscar are being civil now ??
user34: dare i say…oscar and y/n would be a cute couple
danielricciardo: why are you and piastri being cool with each other?
yourusername: isn’t this what you all wanted??
danielricciardo: yeah…i guess we did…didn’t we?
landonorris: I KNEW IT WOULD WORK!!
yourusername: you’re still in trouble, come give me your phone.
landonorris: okay 😞
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— oscarpiastri has posted new photos!
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liked by yourusername, landonorris, maxverstappen1, and 727,918 others!
oscarpiastri: second date, kinda nervous. (she taught me that)
view comments below!
landonorris: second date and already making it instagram official? You’re so whipped 😒
oscarpiastri: didn’t you want us to get along better?
landonorris: yeah, GET ALONG, not GET TOGETHER 😒😒
user35: GET TOGETHER??? EXCUSE MEEEE
user36: THE ENEMIES TO LOVERS!!! IT HAPPNED IT FUCKING HAPPENED. FUCK EVEYONE WHO TOLD ME I WAS DELUSIONAL FOR SAYING THIS WOULD HAPPEN. GUESS WHO WAS RIGHT?? ME! I WAS!
user37: did i just step into a parallel universe where y/n and oscar are dating? because what the actual fuck is going on
maxverstappen1: 😨.
user38: SEE!! EVEN MAX IS ASTONISHED
user39; the period after the emoji is KILLING ME 😭😭
georgerussell63: Is that Y/n????? @/charles_leclerc
charles_leclerc: no? it can’t be?
yourusername: it is
charles_leclerc: AHHHHHHH
georgerussell63: AHHHHHHHH
user39: we did it ladies and gentlemen…after one whole year, the enimies to lovers has finally happened 🥲🥲🥲
landonorris: WE??? NAH BABY ME!! ALL ME!!
yourusername: heart heart
maxverstappen1: 🤨
lewishamilton: 🤨
georgerussell63: 🤨
landonorris: 🤨
logansargent: 🤨
charles_leclerc: 🤨
schecoperez: 🤨
danielricciardo: 🤨
carlossainz: 🤨
yukitsunoda0511: 🤨
fernadoalonso: 🤨
totowolff: 🤨
mclaren: 🤨
yourusername: OMG HE BOUGHT ME A REPLICA OF THE SHIRT HE RUINED, I FORGAVE HIM OKAY???
user40: only the seconds date and he’s already posting her?? oh he’s obsessed.
oscarpiastri: well, yes!
user41: 3 days ago they hated each other so much??? what happened???
yourusername: i’m a really good kisser
user42: DO YOU GUYS TGINK THEY KISSED IN THE CLOSET???
user43: maybe we do have lando to thank…
. . .
notes: one of the longest smau’s i’ve done! reminder that comments and reblogs are so greatly appreciated <33
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diorcities · 4 months
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⠀   ⠀ ──  ˗ˏˋ★ˎˊ˗ a random girl hitting on them !
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it's just you. library.
mark. he's chuckling the whole time. “dude, i have a girlfriend.” your finger traces figures on his pectoral and he simply pulls you away caught in a raucous laugh. “doesn't seem like it. stop giggling, this is serious!” he stands upright and gets serious; all his features relax and now he looks stern, but it doesn't take long for another burst attack him when you lock eyes with him. “i almost got it, dude! sorry, baby, sorry for laughing too much. you know you're the only one.”
haechan. “leave me alone, woman.” he takes the role very seriously. he gives you annoyed sideways glances and even rolls his eyes. you try so hard not to burst out laughing when he looks at you in exasperation. “you're still here?” he's really good, you feel very rejected. his gaze softens when he sees you about to lose it, “did i do a good job?” you nod, causing him to smile and snuggle up close to you “can i get my kiss now?”
chenle. it's hard to get into the role when he looks at you condescendingly and disgusted. “is that the best you can do?” you whine, “i'm trying my best, stop looking at me like that!” he grimaces dramatically in despair, “this is my don't fuck with me face! do you want me to stare at them the way i stare at you?” he gets closer to your face to intimidate you a bit more, “sorry, i have a girlfriend, fuck off,” he says, then he kisses you.
jaemin. he's not complying. like at all. “you're cute.” you look at him with a mixture of stunned and flustered. “she's not cute. stop.” you hit him lightly, “can i get your number, bonbon?” you say, exaggerating every word. “yeah.” oh, god. he doesn't even try. “jaemin na...” he looks at you with eyes stripped of judgment and fondly. you cry sulky as he pulls you to him and gives you pecks. “sorry, what's the game again?”
jeno. “you're really hot.” he looks at you confused by what you said and you almost explode with an overdose of tenderness, “aw, my baby.” he catches you when you propel yourself towards him, smiling with narrowed eyes. “i'm so confused right now.” you nuzzle your cheek on his chest, “you were supposed to reject her,” you mention, “oh, i thought the game hadn't started because you usually say that to me a lot.” you're snatch away from him when he pushes you as he says dead serious, “sorry, i have a girlfriend.”
jisung. you should give him points because he's seriously trying not to laugh. he's so cartoonish at this point. “wait a minute.” he leaves the room as if he's in a movie and he's leaving the frame so he can laugh. “you're such a terrible actor,” you chime when it's the 5th time he leaves to giggle around the corner. “hey!” he returns with a finger pointing at a empty spot. “stop! i have a girlfriend.” you raise your eyebrows, kinda surprised. he proceeds to pull you close “how was it?” he asks, smiling. you can only nod. “and now, for the final act. a kiss!”
renjun. “well i can't start if you stare at me with those eyes.” you're amazed, “that's the point.” you see him weigh, “no, 'cause you look too pretty, i can't reject you. try tousling your hair!... and do a funny face.” you do as he says, but then he burst out laughing. “baby,” you whine. “my pretty clown. i don't like you! leave me alone!” he says it so seriously and sternly that you start to believe that you shouldn't have done all that and, he (like always when you come up with silly ideas) just wanted to play dumb with you.
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rafeandonlyrafe · 4 months
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5 4 3 2 1
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words: 1.3k
warnings: 18+ only, smut, p in v sex, unprotected sex, cockwarming, established relationship, countdown, edging
“here ya go baby.” rafe says, tossing you the sweatshirt he just took off.
“huh?” you question, but tug the sweatshirt on over your head. rafe always made fun of you for stealing all of his clothes, and you don't know why he's now so willingly handing it over.
“since im going out of town.” rafe explains, coming over to press a kiss against your forehead as you relax on his bed. 
you pout, gripping onto his hand so he can't move away. “don't remind me.”
rafe is going on some business type trip with his dad, only for a week, but it'll be the longest you've been away from each other since you began dating. 
“sorry, baby.” rafe says, moving to kiss your lips. you melt against the bed, cupping rafes face and running your thumbs over the smooth planes of his cheeks. you groan when he pulls away, cutting off the kiss.
“i have to pack.” rafe explains, heading into his closet and reemerging with his suitcase, setting it on the edge of the bed and opening it up.
you wrap yourself in his sweatshirt, inhaling rafes scent as you chat idly while rafe packs, trying to keep your mind off him actually leaving.
“rafey.” you whine when hes all done, suitcase stuffed full and zipped up by the door, ready to be loaded into the car.
“what is it honey?” rafe asks.
“can you come cuddle with me?” you question, knowing you're going to be deprived of his arms around you for an entire week and want as much as you can of him before he goes.
rafe smiles gently, loving how obsessed with him you are. “of course.” rafe says, pushing the covers down so you can get comfy against the sheets before easing himself in next to you, pulling you into his arms.
“im gonna miss you so much baby.” rafe says, placing a hand on your bum, squeezing it against his palm.
“if i can't sleep while you're gone, can i come and sleep in your bed?” you question. you still live separately from rafe, but often spend your nights together, neither of your parents caring since you're both adults.
“yeah, of course.” rafe says. “rose and wheezie will be home, but you know they don't mind.” rafe says, and you hum in agreement, making a mental note to hang out with wheezie while rafe is gone, maybe take her shopping or to the movies.
rafe moves his hand to your hip, pulling you so your crotch is slotted over his. you adjust yourself, squirming until you get comfortable with one leg slung over his hips.
“stop moving like that unless you want me to fuck you.” rafe groans, trying to keep to just cuddling like you requested, but struggling when you're moving right against his crotch.
you look up, a sly look on your face. “i always want you to fuck me.” you push your core against rafe, grinding your hips down.
“oh, fuck.” rafe groans, pressing his head back against the pillows as he eyes flutter closed, his mouth dropping open.
you continue to move against him as you feel rafe harden, his impressive length swelling in size.
rafe tugs at your shorts, hating the physical barrier blocking him from having you wholly.
you push them down your hips, kicking them further into the blanket to be taken care of later when you aren't solely focused on rafe and getting him inside of you.
“god, gonna miss this baby.” rafe grips your ass, his hand covering your whole bum. 
“you sure you can't sneak me with you?” you whine, continuing to grind against him as rafes hand pushes underneath your underwear.
“i don't think ward would go for that, but i want you to call me every night.” rafe tugs your underwear to the side, fingers swiping through your folds.
“oh, that feels good.” you moan, warm and happy now that you're snuggled up under the blankets with rafe.
“gonna feel even better when i get inside of you.” rafe hums out, finger moving to your clit, focusing on it as his eyes drink in the sight of your head tipped back, eyes closed and mouth slung open with pleasure. 
“i love you.” rafe mumbles, presses kisses along your cheeks and over the bridge of your nose.
“you softie.” you giggle at the side of rafe only you get to see.
“there's one part of me that's never soft around you.” rafe guides your hand to his obvious bulge before immediately going back to stroking your clit.
you laugh again as you push away his shorts and underwear until his cock is able to spring free. you wrap your hand around the base, holding there for a moment, teasing rafe like he so often does to you.
“baby-” rafe groans out, but then you're moving your hips and sinking onto his cock.
“shit!” rafe groans out, his other arm that was wrapped around your body pulling you even closer to him.
“not gonna be able to go a week without this.” you whimper, beginning to rock your hips back and forth, the side position forcing you to keep the movements slower.
“ill come back and fuck you for hours, promise.” rafe hums out, not wanting to think about leaving either.
“you do that anyways.” you chuckle.
“yeah, you're right.” rafe smiles at you before suddenly thrusting forward, burying himself hard and fast inside of your pussy.
your eyes close again as he picks up a steady pace, fucking into you with no qualms about anyone who might be roaming the hallways and listening in on the sound of slapping skin.
“so tight and warm for me.” rafe grunts, shuffling his shorts and underwear a bit further down his legs so he can better fuck you.
“all for you.” you place a hand on rafes cheek and bring his mouth to yours, kissing him deeply, moans and gasps being the only interruptions to your kiss as rafes fingers continue to toy with your clit.
“make me cum, please.” you whine.
“not yet.” rafe hums against your lips. “wait for me.”
you have a problem none of your girlfriends have with their boyfriends. he's too good, too hot, and you're always ready to cum before him, whereas everyone you talk to has the opposite problem or their partners can't make them cum at all.
“can't.” you cry out, feeling how hard your nipples are as they press against rafes chest through the fabric of his sweatshirt that you're wearing, tightening your leg that's slung over his thigh to get him closer.
“you can.” rafe says firmly. 
you focus on the motion of his cock entering you, the way that your cunt stretches to allow him inside, only to clench and attempt to stop his outward thrust when he pulls back.
“5…” rafe begins to count, feeling his cock swell and knowing he can't last much longer.
“4…” he continues, fingers moving faster on your clit.
“3…” the countdown feels like it's taking hours, even though it's certainly just seconds.
“2…” rafe can feel your clit pulsing underneath his fingertips.
“1.” rafe pushes his hips as hard as he can forward, burying his cock as deep inside of you as possible as he cums along with you, your cunt clenching around him as your high causes your whole body to shake with relief after holding off.
“god, rafe!” you squeal out as he gives a few final thrusts, ensuring his seed is buried as deep as possible.
rafe pulls his fingers away as you come down from your high, head laid against his chest.
“just… stay like this for a bit. please.” rafe says, hand on your hip to keep you on his cock.
“of course.” you manage to pick your tired head up to press a kiss to his lips. “i could fall asleep just like this.”
rafe let's out a yawn just at the mention of sleep. “i certainly wouldn't say no to that.”
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