#oh and please ignore any typos
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
snippet of my untitled wip for a fandom i had no plans to write for, which is The Sandman, and it's a dreamling fic
seems i'm back on my predictable bullshit in life and writing things i had not planned when i have a backlog of other shit that needs doing
well, at least i'm predictable
so, not sure when it'll be done, not really sure about how the readers and fandom are over in these parts, but eh, rolling with it
i haven't read the comics, only seen the show, and this is me finally giving into the little gremlin in my brain and writing this shit so it'll shut up
this story will be heavy, angsty, and please see the bold warning below:
This fic (and snippet) contain implied rape/non-con
okay, so a little snippet is after the cut, i'll be working on this over the next week, creative energies are slowly returning, enjoy!
(oh and it's a/b/o too, in case that's not your thing)
"Please, Dream, it's notâI didn'tâ" Hob tried, the world a blur as his only anchor cutting the chain between them.
The stumbled, hurried steps he took in chase never had a chance of reaching him in timeâDream didn't allow himself to be halted unless he choseâHob knew but still tried.
Further pleas remained lodged in his throat, though, as his gaze briefly caught a glimpse of the discarded flowers which now lay like corpses on the table.
His fingertips brushed Dreamâs arm, but before they could make purchase, a gust of sand swept him away.
A hundred thoughts, all dripping with an oily coating of shame, overcame him.
His hand came to claw at his chest as realization of what Dream must have assumed, seeing him in that state, sank into his bones.
Shame and regret pried its fingers between his ribs and yanked, making plenty of room for anger and hurt to make a home.
Oh god, heâd thought⊠Dream had seen the teeth marks set into the flesh of his neck and not even hesitated to make a judgmentâŠ
And that fact, that he hadnât paused, that heâd just seen the marks left on him by thatâby that fucking alpha the night beforeâthe one that had taken what heâd had no right to haveâŠ.
It seemed impossible that the pain of what heâd been through could have been made worse, but this? The way Dreamâs expression had hardened, closing off, the way heâd taken a step back then another, lifting his chin before discarding the flowers on the table, saying all too crisply, âI apologize for disturbing your privacy so unexpectedlyâIâll take my leave.â
Dream had not waited for an explanationâand as insane as it was, the hurt of his dismissal didnât immediately bring Hob to tears. Instead, it lured something a bit more frightening from the depths, Â dragged from the mangled mess of his heart.
Something that sounded wrong to his own earsâa giggle, small, then growing until it twisted and became just shy of deranged.
His shoulders shook as laughter overtook him, louder and more bitter to the point of hysterical as it cut his throat like shards of glass until he was choking on it, until he submitted to the hurt and folded to the floor, right there on his knees in the lingering sand on the floorboards.
#dreamling fic#dreamling#dream x hob#snippets#my wips#snark writes#the sandman#oh and please ignore any typos#this really is right from the draft and probably a hot mess despite trying to give it a once over
21 notes
·
View notes
Note
PLEASE ELABORATE ON THE BISHOVA MEET CUTE FROM YOUR TAGS (if you want to, no pressure)
(Prompt: do you think vampires get run over because people canât see them in their rear view mirrors?)
The first time Kateâs official S.H.I.E.L.D. communicator goes off, sheâs in the middle of a terrible recurring stress dream where sheâs made it to the finals of Hellâs Kitchen, but all the ingredients keep coming alive like they escaped from the set of a new Muppets movie and Gordon Ramsey wonât stop yelling that âthe carrots are so raw even Bugs Bunny wonât eat them!â
Which is to say, that in all the dream-chaos, she doesnât actually hear it at all. (And also that she should probably stop watching cartoons before bed, but thatâs a problem for Future Kate.)
So when she jerks awake in a cold sweat, begging the vegetables to âstop singing so i can murder you for Gordon,â it takes a minute for her to recover enough to notice that the insistant beeping isnât actually the kitchen timer letting her know thatâs sheâs about to burn some boiling water, but rather that sheâs being summoned.
By S.H.I.E.L.D.
For her first real assignment as a S.H.I.E.L.D. operative.
And sheâs still wearing her yummy sushi pajamas.
âOh, shit!â
Kate flings herself out of bed with such force that Pizza Dog startles awake, immediately on alert for intruders. But he quickly realizes itâs just his human doing what she does, and he settles back down at the foot of the bed. His eye tracks Kate, frantically yanking clothes out of her dresser while said pajamas get flung in the general vicinity of the hamper. He gives an eager whine when she pulls her socks on, but she just grimaces in reply.
âSorry, buddy,â she apologizes, âbut this is a work call. Weâll take a nice long walk when Iâm back, promise.â She gives his head a quick pat, âgo back to sleep,â and then rattles down the stairs, her pants still unbuttoned and her flaccid belt dangling useless from the loops.
â
Kate stumbles out of the elevator, hopping on one foot as she tries to tie the shoelaces on the other. The squeaking rubber of her sole ricochets off the concrete walls of the parking garage, the soft thump of her hops beating out the unsteady rhythm of a toddler who just discovered the joy of smacking things. But eventually the knot is knotted and Kate gets both feet back on the ground. She removes her bow from her mouth and bolts through the garage.
Soon enough, sheâs running up on her super cool, super sweet, super not at all intimidating to drive official S.H.I.E.L.D. Suburban. (Apparently ride shares are, in Director Furyâs words, âunprofessionalâ and âa security riskâ, so Kate is now officially liscensed to drive in the State of New York.)
(God help anyone she shares the road with.)
A quick press of the key fob and the alarm chirps, the driverâs door easily popping open when Kate pulls the handle. She clambers inside, tucking her bow on the passenger seat, and then awkwardly wiggles the strap of her quiver over her head. (And only accidentally hits the horn twice, much improved from the last time where there was so much thrashing she worried she might set off the airbag.)
Once the bow and her arrows are secured, Kate starts the car, buckles up, and checks all her mirrors. Itâs the middle of the night, so thereâs not much risk, but sheâs still pretty new to this whole driving thing, and better safe than sorry.
It looks all clear, so Kate slips the SUV into reverse and backs out of the parking spot, with maybe a little more lead in her foot than she should. But itâs late, and the garage is empty, so sheâs sure itâll be just â
THUNK.
âOh my God,â Kate says.
âOh my God!â Someone behind the car shouts.
âOh my God!â Kate screams, frantically clawing at the handle to escape this death trap monstrosity before it murders her, too. The door pops open and as soon as she moves to flee, the car begins rolling backward.
âStop!â The person shouts again. âYouâve already hit me once!â
Kate slams her foot back on the brake, puts the SUV in park, and then gets out.
Only for the seatbelt to yank her back in when she tries.
(Thatâs it. Unprofessional or not, sheâs sticking with the subway from now on. The only real danger there is being forced to listen to buskers or get bit by a rat.)
Freed from the carâs attempt to strangle her, Kate rushes around the back just in time to see a woman standing up. Which is great! Dead people donât walk around on two feet so Kate hasnât committed vehicular manslaughter! What a great night!
Itâs hard to tell, with her back turned to Kate, but it seems like the woman is just a little disheveled. Some dust on her leather coat. Short blonde hair in slight disarray. And a backpackâs been flung several feet away from the almost-murder scene. But other than that⊠no blood, no bones protruding from any skin, no damage at all really.
âI am,â Kate moves for the bag, âjust so so sorry. I swear I checked my mirrors and didnât see you.â
âYes, well how could you?â The woman brushes dust off her pants, not even bothering to glance Kateâs way. âThat boat youâre driving could block the Suez Canal itâs so big.â
Weird reference, but, âYeah, itâs - itâs for work. I hate it.â She holds the bag out. âAre you okay?â
âI am in one piece,â the stranger states, and then rolls out a shoulder. It cracks. âYou did not think to look before backing up?â
âWell, I checked my mirrors,â Kate says again. She did. She definitely did. âI swear I didnât see you.â
âThat is why you look,â she insists. âYou have never heard of a blind spot? Or are all spots blind to you?â
âOkay thatâs a little rude.â
âYou just ran me over!â She aggressively brushes off her jacket, dust motes swirling through the shafts of light. âI could have been child! I could have been cute little puppy dog!â
Which is just outrageous. Itâs the middle of the night! Itâs not like a kid would be skulking around a parking garage in the middle of the night! And what kind of puppy⊠no, okay, that oneâs fair. A stray dog mightâve run out and Kate wouldâve been devastated.
But one didnât! The only person who got hit was this woman who is, honestly, being a little bit dramatic about the whole thing.
Kate huffs. âLook, the blame isnât like totally on me here. I mean, what were you doing lurking around right behind my car like that? You didnât see the brake lights?â
âMe?â The woman whips around, and as soon as she does, Kate regrets saying the words. âYou hit me, but this is my fault?â
âNo,â Kate rushes to say, âno, of course not. Itâs totally on me. Iâm so sorry.â
She offers the backpack, and the woman takes it, a bit of the fury snuffing out as her eyes take Kate in, head to toe.
âIâm really sorry,â Kate says again. âAre you - do you need a ride to the hospital? Iâm in kind of a rush for work, but thereâs one on the way.â
The woman snorts. âYou think I would voluntarily get into that car with you? After you literally just ran me over with it?â
Kate shrugs, offering the smoothest smile sheâs got. âHard for me to hit you with the car if youâre inside it?â
The woman just stares at her, gaze taking in every inch of Kateâs face. Then she barks out a laugh. âI must be concussed because I actually found that charming.â
Kateâs gotten worse compliments. âAre you okay though?â
âI will live.â The woman sniffs, pulls her backpack on. âMostly.â
Kate inches back towards the car door. S.H.I.E.L.D. is waiting, after all. âDo you - I mean, can I maybe make it up to you? Dry clean your coat? Polish your shoes? Buy you a drink?â
The woman tilts her head. She regards Kate with a heavy gaze, some calculation taking place behind her eyes. And itâs a little scary, being on the receiving end of such intense scrutiny. Scary and, if Kateâs being honest, a little thrilling. (Her would-be victim is rather easy on the eyes. Kateâs not mad about looking.)
Finally, the woman smiles. And when she does, itâs wide enough to flash the long fangs of her teeth.
âYes,â she says, âa drink does sound nice.â
And, âoh,â Kate realizes, âoh, no.â
#bishova#kate bishop#yelena belova#ohhhh am i still able to write these guys??#i canât tell if iâve lost it after two and a half years of not writing them#oh gosh this was so fun though!!!#thank you friend :D !!!#aromarianne#please ignore any typos and whatnot iâm literally about to pass out for beddy time :)
45 notes
·
View notes
Text
gojo satoru x reader | college au [18+]
kickoff ch.9 words you've been wanting to hear
á° pairing. college au - soccer player! gojo x film major! reader
á° summary. gojo satoru is the most popular guy on your college campus. he's tall, funny, hot, not to mention he's the most talented soccer forward the school has seen in years. but he's also a frat dude, which puts him in a world very different from your own, as he spends most of his nights partying & drinking while you spend most of yours working on your annoying film major assignments. but when he reaches out to you for a favor, you realize that helping him out might have something in it for you too.
á° warnings/tags. 18+, fem reader, fluff, angst, smut, college au, fraternities, sororities, partying, drinking/alcohol, romance, jealousy, pining, slow burn, opposites to lovers, friends to lovers, she falls first he falls harder, gojo being an idiot, marijuana use, sexism, sexual harassment (verbal only)
á° chapter. 9/x (probably 12)
á° words. 15.6k (WHY DO THEY KEEP GETTING LONGER)
a/n. HELLO MY DEAR KICKOFF READERS IVE MISSED YOU ALL SO MUCH i am soooo sorry for the wait on this one. this chapter felt very vulnerable to write for some reason lmfao, but i really hope it was worth the wait :''') see you at the bottom!! if there are typos or some things don't make sense i'm so sorry i literally gave up on proofreading this i just ended up raw-doggin it and then posting it
nav. masterlist
âŸÂ·Ì©Íêł moodboard no.1
âŹ.*ïŸplaylist
an additional author's note. hellooo ellie here. there are some additional warnings/tags for this chapter, i added them to the tags above, so if you know you have any sort of triggers, please refer to them before reading! but if you don't have any and don't want to be spoiled ab anything then you can keep reading lol. thank youu <33
--
The restaurant address that Kai sent you was just a ten minute taxi ride away, save for the five minutes you spent trying to evasively maneuver through the hotel lobby in order to avoid running into people youâre not too keen on seeing right now, a list that stacks up to just one person at this moment.
Itâs a Korean barbecue place, itâs been ages since youâve been to one, probably since theyâre way too expensive for any sort of outing you could afford these days, but the crisp sizzling sounds of the grills and the savory air has your mouth watering in a way that makes you indifferent to the cost. Anything to get this churning feeling out of your stomach.Â
Itâs instantly brought to your attention that Hanaâs tipsy off of Soju because sheâs slid out of the booth the second you emerge to the tablestide, and sheâs onto her feet to pull you into a hug. You hug her back.
âIâm ssssoooooooo glad youâreâhicâhere,â she says, voice sounding loud near your ear, but her embrace is surprisingly calming to you.
Her face appears flushed when you pull away, and you give her a smile and a kind hold of her elbow. âIâm happy to be here, sorry for coming late, I just decided I wanted to have dinner with you all.â
Minato is pulling on Hanaâs arm to get her to sit down, which she finally agrees to, and you glance to the left side of the table where Kai sat, meticulously turning over pieces of meat on the grill. His eyes are on you, and the seat next to him is empty.
âYou look nice,â he says, eyes falling to your lap under the table once youâve taken a seat next to him.
Your eyes fall to your lap as well. âOh. Thanks. I wasnât really trying to look any sort of way, though.â Just faded jeans with a few rips & holes you made yourself, way back in high school when that sort of thing was trendy.
âI know,â he says, smirk heard perfectly through his words, âI like that.â
You ignore him, a fleeting thought passing through your head of how annoyingly forward men are to women theyâve met within a day, just something youâve noticed recently, and then youâre accepting the glass of Soju that Minatoâs poured for you. Quick to tip it back, you feel a burn on your tongue thatâs just enough to distract.
âTodayâs game was pretty interesting,â Minato speaks up, picking up a few pieces off the grill with his chop sticks and placing them on Hanaâs plate first before taking some for himself. You find the gesture sweet. âThe first half was intense.â
Hana nods enthusiastically, elbows rested on the tabletop as she waves her hands around in the air. âUh huh, uh huh, the boys kicked the ball like whoosh. Goes all over the place! Canât get aâhicâcanât get a single shot. No, I mean me, I canât get a camera shot. Not them, they can get the shots of goals. The goals of shots? Huh.â
âAlright, youâve had enough,â Minato grumbles as he drags the glass of Soju that she was nursing away from her.Â
Kai lets out a laugh beside you, his knee bumping against yours under the table. âIâve watched so many of these soccer games for this job, and Iâve still got no damn clue what the rules are.â
You blink down at your empty plate for a second before grabbing the silver chopsticks laid neatly on your napkin, and taking some food from the center of the table. âReally? Iâve only been to a couple, and I feel like I get the gist of it.â Maybe itâs because you had a personal interest, though.
Kai lets out a low whistle next to you. âOkay, youâre a smartass then.â
You give him a sidewards glance. âMaybe youâre just dumb?âÂ
Your own words startle you a bit. Minato lets a laugh out, but under his breath, while Hana does absolutely nothing to conceal hers. Kaiâs eyes just widen. You bite down on a carrot stick.
âHey, hey, hey, y/n,â Hana chirps, tapping at your wrist, âdo you know any of the soccer players? Utahime said you doooo.â
You swallow slowly to buy yourself time, but give a preliminary shake of your head before answering, âno, not really.â You catch a whiff of the cologne on your wrist when you lift your glass to your lips.
âOh,â she sulks her shoulders and then sinks down into the booth again, her head falling onto Minatoâs shoulder. The man stiffens a bit and then thereâs a content smile playing at his lips. A hint of a smile develops on your face too at the sight when you put two and two together. What an adorable little crush. It makes you feel sick.
Kai pours you some more Soju the second you drink down the last of it in your glass, and you nod to him as a thanks. âPretty sure most of my photos from the first half are fucked,â he says, dragging the opening of the bottle against the rim of your glass before pulling it away, âdidnât realize until way later that my aperture was way off.â
You bring the glass to your lips, inhaling before taking a sip. Youâre about to speak up about that when Minato beats you to it.
âAre you serious?â he asks, disappointed, like theyâre suddenly talking business now. âI better see some good shots. Your side was where most of the action took place. Like that through-pass, tight behind the defensive line, from Nanami Kento to Gojo Satoru before he sunk it a couple mins before the half ended.â
You choke a little on your Soju at the mention of Gojoâs name, and then all three of them are looking at you. You wave a hand in front of your face. âSorry.âÂ
Kai grumbles something under his breath and then stuffs a piece of pork belly into his mouth. âYeah, whatever, man. Iâm pretty sure I got some good ones. Donât worry.â
Dinner goes on like that, where you count the number of times Kai thinks that someone saying something funny across the table is an excuse to press his thigh against yours, but at least the cute way that Hana and Minato seem to inch closer to one another all night is enough to put you at some sort of bitter ease. But that unsettling feeling in your stomach from a couple of hours ago still lingers.
The four of you stand outside the restaurant, heels rocking back and forth in the cold as you all take up the last chance to debrief the day, and then Minatoâs glancing at his watch.
âAlright, itâs probably time to head back. We can all share a ride to the hotel, itâs cheaper that way,â Minato says. Hanaâs clinging to his sleeve.
âOh, uh, I was going to stay here. Thereâs a cool camera shop around the corner. I was gonna check it out,â Kai says, pointing over his shoulder before glancing at you. âWanna come? I saw theyâve got used film cameras.â
You twiddle with the hotel key card in your pocket. Itâs cheap plastic, could break easily with just the right amount of pressure. Like your resolve right now. âSure.â
He smiles at you.
âAlright, well I need to get this one back to her room,â Minato says with a sigh, pointing to Hana, âso Iâll see you all at the next game?â
You and Kai nod at him and then watch as he walks away with Hana on his arm towards the curb, pulling his phone out to call for a ride.
âWhereâs this camera shop at?â you ask Kai once the silence between the two of you stretches out a little too long.Â
âIt really is just around the corner,â he says, shoving his hands in the pockets of his jacket. He starts walking down the row of miscellaneous shops and establishments under dim street lighting, and you follow after him before the two of you circle to the adjacent end. A tiny shop in the distance catches your eye. The LED sign above the storefront was blinking sporadically, and read 17th St Camera & Rentals, except half the letters were extinct of any light. Next to it was a 24/7 liquor store.
Itâs only when you walk right up to it that you realize the sign dangling behind the glass door that says closed.
âOh. Bummer,â Kai comments in a flat tone. âI swear it was open before I got to the restaurant.â
You sigh, pulling your phone out to glance at the time. âYeah, at 8pm? Itâs past 10 now.â
He looks at you and taps the camera case still hung at his neck. âThatâs fine. Iâve still got a camera to show you, anyways.â
You blink your eyes at him, suddenly feeling a bit exhausted and then glance over your shoulder at the curb of the street to see if Minato & Hana were still there waiting for a ride. You donât see them anymore.Â
A distraction. Wasnât that what you wanted?
âYeah, show me.â
Kai seems to know the area better than you, since he walks down the haphazardly lain sheets of concrete across the ground with more confidence than a tourist would. The thought occurs to you that maybe the newsletter photographers have eaten here before during their time in Kyoto.
âWhat made you start working with the newsletter?â you ask, glancing at him as the two of you walk down further, into what seems like a neighborhood.
He shrugs. âFirst job I could find out of college. I had a lot of freelance experience, so Iâm assuming thatâs why they hired me.â He nudges your arm with his elbow. âWhat about you?â
âIâve known Utahime for a while. She was impressed with my work.â
âAhh, connections,â he muses, âsmart. Thatâll get you far as an artist.â
He suddenly stops walking and peers off to the right, into a darkness that you canât really make anything out of until youâve spent a few seconds staring too. He walks in that direction, the loud echoing stomps of his boots on concrete no longer audible once he crosses the threshold onto grass, and you follow behind to what seems like a deserted childrenâs park. You wish there were more trees in the city. There are a lot here in the countryside, and it makes you homesick for something youâre not even sure of.
A gust of wind brushes through, rattling the set of swings hung on rusty chains. The wood chips underneath your feet feel stale, with no snap to them at all as you follow Kai through the playhouses set up in connected fashion. There are two picnic benches, one looks like itâs been freshly painted with faux effort to improve its image in the line of sight of the street, while the other has red paint peeled back to reveal bronze underneath the moonlight, neglected and tucked behind a few trees. The latter is what he chooses.
He slides into the bench, and he shakes his head when he sees you try to take a seat on the other side before patting at the seat beside him. âItâd be easier for you to take a look at my side.â
He has a point, so you sit next to him instead. Although at this point in the night, you were feigning interest. He zips his camera bag open and you take a better look at the lens. Thereâs no way it was as cheap as he told you it was.
âThereâs no way this was as cheap as you told me it was,â you say.
He laughs, pulling the camera out and handing it to you. âYeah, maybe the guy cut me a deal since Iâve bought from him before.â
Youâre smart enough to put the strap around your neck, even though youâre only holding it a few inches above the table, because a camera like this deserves the care and respect. The material is minimalist and sleek, and itâs heavy in your hands. You click the shutter button, screen coming to life with a few mechanic chirps. âWoah. Is it LCD or OLED?â
âLCD.â
âThatâs nice,â you say, âpaying for the OLED just seems silly to me.â
âI concur, Canon. Color accuracy is king.â
He shuffles to pull something out of his pocket while you continue to inspect the camera in your hands, and you see him fidget with said thing over the table in the corner of your eye. The flick of something and the light of something makes you turn your head to face him, and heâs pinching the end of a joint to his mouth, lighting the other end.
He gives you a glance when you stare for too long, inhaling from it before pulling it from his mouth. âWhat?â You can see the smoke leave his mouth in the chill of the air.
âIs that why you chose the secluded bench?â
âI did? Didnât even notice.â
You blink at him, and he places his elbow on the table to lean closer to you.Â
âDo you mind it?â he asks.
âNo, not really.â
âWanna smoke with me?â Two fingers pinching the origin of smoke tilt towards you. âThis is my good weed, though, so, I charge by the drag.â
âThatâs ridiculous, and no thanks. It doesnât suit me.â
He lets out a laugh, releasing whatever tension he was building in your space, and the smell of weed is nauseating, but at least it's a new sensation to you.
âYouâve gotta be the only film major on the planet that doesnât smoke weed. How do you manage?â he asks, the orange flicker of his joint being the only color you can distinctly see under the similarly flickering street lights.Â
Your finger traces the rim of the camera lens and is careful to not smudge the glass. âI think I manage just fine.â
âYeah. With delusion,â he says, coughing, scattering smoke into the air this time instead of a clean blow.
You turn a bit in your seat to face him more, placing the camera down. âYouâre extremely blunt.â
His eyebrow raises in amusement and you close your eyes with annoyance at the pun. You brush it off.
âI mean, seriously, I get youâre probably just looking out for me, I guess. I appreciate that. But do you really think my dreams of becoming a filmmaker are that far-fetched?â you ask. Thereâs a crack to your voice at the end that you didnât like.
He sighs, setting his wrist down on the table. Thereâs a long pause where he thinks about what to say. Probably the most youâve seen him consider what words leave his mouth next. âI was in the same shoes as you, y/n. A couple years ago. I, too, had big dreams of making movies. I was going to apply to film grad school as well, although youâre shooting higher than I was at the time. Thereâs no way I wouldâve gotten into UTokyoâs.â He tilts his head to the side a few times while looking straight off ahead. âI sent scripts in everywhere. To every fucking production company, creative agency, you name it. Never got a callback, not even once. While all my fellow grads were landing decent, respectable jobs.â He brings the joint to his mouth again, but he doesnât inhale, just bitterly bites it. âI couldâve went on like that, but,â his brow furrows, âIâve seen my peers torture themselves for years for those dreams of theirs. I swore I wouldnât be one of them. Because theyâre all delusional fucks.â He finally glances at you. âAre you one, too?â
Your shoulders drop a little and your lips purse. âI donât know yet. Itâs too early to say.âÂ
âItâs never too early to say, if the outcome is all the same,â he tells you.Â
You consider his words for a moment. Itâs the easy way out. You should consider yourself lucky. Everyone wants a reason, a sign, to turn away from the one thing theyâre scared to think about. And here he was, giving that to you on a silver platter.
But if what you wanted was really all that fragile, then it means thereâs nothing to show for any of it. For all the effort it took you to get here, and all the effort youâre still willing to give.Â
âIâll keep going until I fail,â you say, âor until I succeed.â Itâs not really something you say for him, but for yourself.
He juts his bottom lip out and raises his eyebrows, slowly nodding his head, like heâs impressed by you. But his posture remains lax. âI mean, youâre working this job. Youâve got some sort of plan, at least. Itâs not like Iâm your parent to tell you what to do and what not to do.â He finally takes another drag, eyebrows pinching together at the same time his fingers pinch close to the burn of his joint to pull it away. âWhatâs that one saying? You can take a horse to the water, but you canât make it drink.â
âWow. You donât sound a day older than sixty-five.â
He smirks at you. âYouâve got a lot of attitude, Canon. Where does it come from?â
You sink a little in your seat, turning away from him to look down at your hands that were still messing with the features of his camera. âMy annoying feelings lately.â
âFeelings about what?â
You consider telling the truth. But you donât. âMy car is in repair and Iâm not sure I can afford to pay for the bill, since things keep coming up with it.â It was the thing at the top of your mind at the moment though, for some reason, so partially truthful.
He laughs. âYeah, cars have a way of doing that when youâre finally getting caught up on bills.â
âAt what point does spontaneously picking up random, obscure jobs go from omg Iâm so excited to have this opportunity to I just need the money?â you ask.
âYou mean youâre not already at that point yet?â he says with a scoff. âSoon, then.â
You sigh.
âYâknow I used to work at this lousy cinema a few miles away from Central,â he tells you, hand tapping the table with a rhythm that makes no sense. âBusted my ass working minimum wage on night shifts because I thought Iâd catch a big break in conversation with a director, as if Martin Fucking Scorcese would choose to host his opening night at a random Edwards in Tokyo.â His tapping on the table stops. âTell me that isnât pathetic as hell.â
âThatâs pathetic as hell.â
âThe things youâll do for money,â he says with a sigh. He sounds detached, like itâs really just a message for you.
You lick your lips, skin feeling dry from the wind that occasionally brushes by, and when you glance at Kai again, thereâs a grit to his jaw.
âShouldâve been born as one of those damn college athletes,â he grumbles, sucking in fast through the joint that was close to withering away. âThose fuckers donât pay tuition.â
The harsh colors of the soccer teamâs color-coded practice schedule on your phone are visible when you blink, as well as the exhaustion under Gojoâs eyes in the warm lighting of the hotel lobby earlier tonight. âThey work hard.â
He looks at you. âI work hard, too.â
Your shoulders tense. âIâm sure.â
âYou work hard as well.â Just to include you.
âYeah.â
âI mean, you canât tell me that itâs fair.â
Your mind wanders to some of the people youâve met on that team, who have been nice to you. You think of Gojo, and the memory of him makes you wish you were with him right now. Despite everything.
âI guess itâs not fair,â is all you say, a tactic to diffuse the conversation, one that youâve had to use twice with him today. The sound of the swing chains clinking together from the wind in the distance runs a chill down your spine.
You feel heavy in your chest, and you glance at the joint pinched in between Kaiâs fingers. Heâs not keeping an eye on it, so itâs easy to steal, and you bring it to your lips before sucking in. You instantly let out a few coughs. Heâs looking at you with surprise. And youâre still in desperate need of that distraction youâve been craving.
âHow long does it take for it to kick in?â you ask, coughing again and pressing a hand to your chest.
âSuper long when you can barely stomach a single drag.â
You try again. He watches you. You swear you feel a buzz this time, and you hand the joint back to him. You feel like youâre having an out-of-body experience.
âHow are you feeling?â he asks.
âGood,â you tell him, âreally good.â
âThatâs gotta be placebo, Canon.â
âNo, really,â you sigh it. Even if it was, maybe your mind was just blessing you with a single moment of reprieve. âI feelâŠreally good,â you say with your head in a haze. âBest IâveâŠâ you donât know why you have to blink back tears, âbest Iâve felt this whole week.â
Kaiâs silent next to you. You look over at him, and heâs got a scrutinizing expression on his face. His eyes are glazed. âYou seeing anyone right now, Canon?â
Itâs the savory question you know has been on the tip of his tongue. Ignorantly asked, as if you wouldâve been sitting here with him right now in the dead of night if the answer was yes.Â
âNo.â
Heâs leaning towards you, and youâre dazed and also sleepy. His face is close now, thereâs an urge to giggle, which means thereâs no way this is all just placebo, and when his lips dip towards yours, youâre conscious enough to push him away by a weakly fisted hand pressed to his collarbone.
âOh. I. Um,â you stutter.
âWhat?â he asks, eyebrow raised, still close to you.
âNo. No thanks.â Because it felt wrong.Â
He fully pulls away from you, and runs a hand through his hair, a deep sigh leaving him. âAlright.â
Youâre breathing faster now, surroundings feeling vague, like youâre in sweltering heat but the air only bites cold.
You stand up suddenly. âIâŠI want to go back.â
âGo back where?â
âTo the hotel. To my room.â You pause. âI mean, by myself. Not with you. We can share a ride, though.â
He stands up too, hands reaching for you, gripping the straps of his camera still hung around your neck and he pulls it off to place it back into the case. You feel like youâve lost favor with him somehow. âOkay. Sure.âÂ
âBut not with you.â You felt the need to clarify again.
âI get it, Canon. Itâs fine.â
â
âMaybe you just need to fuck him aggressively without mercy.â
âI beg your finest pardon?â
Youâre sitting in a booth inside this streetside KFC with Mina sitting across the table, waving a fry around in the air, and with Nobara next to you as she tries to open a packet of ketchup with her teeth. The hangout the three of you have been hyping up all week, just to be sat in the same place you always go to. You were about to take a bite out of your sandwich, but you set it back down on your tray.
Mina points the fry at you and shrugs. âIâm saying. Maybe youâre having such a hard time getting over Gojo because you got so close to fucking him in that bathroom, but you didnât, and now youâre in, like, this constant state of edging.â She bites down on the fry. âThe clit knows what the heart doesnât.â
âYour theories never fail to amaze me,â you mumble, sinking further into the booth.Â
âPerhaps itâll take the edge off.â Mina sucks through the straw of her Diet coke. Nobara finally succeeds in opening her packet of ketchup.
âI doubt it. Besides, I technically already gave him an invitation to,â you say, fingers rubbing at your eye with a swipe as you wince from the memory, âand he rejected me, so, still swimming in the self hatred from that one.â
Mina hums. âThereâs no way heâs not foaming at the mouth for it, y/n. Men never let a meal they were craving go unfinished,â she states, dramatically stabbing a chicken nugget with a fork.
âWhat kind of pigs do you guys associate yourselves with?â Nobara asks. Sheâs a lesbian, by the way.
âI raise another question. Why are we talking about this in a public restaurant?â you offer.
âListen, babes,â Mina continues, like your words fall on deaf ears because sheâs got some point to make, âitâll either poof. Make your feelings go away like the drop of a hat because you find out heâs a bad lay. Or itâll be so good that you realize youâre never getting over him and youâll be thinking of his dick instead of your husbandâs on your wedding night.â
âWeâre. In. A. Public. Restaurant.â
Mina steals a biscuit from your tray. âIf it ends up being the first outcome, then the whole thing was my idea. If itâs the secondâŠthen just know that Nobara has steered you wrong.â
âWhy the hell do you have to drag me into this?â Nobara asks.
Youâre about to take a bite from your sandwich again when youâre interrupted by the buzzing of your phone in your purse. You pull it out and glance at the caller ID, then let out a sigh.
âSorry, I have to take this,â you mumble, slipping out of the booth and towards the restaurantâs exit, pushing the tense door open with a gust of fresh air brushed through you.
âHello?â Itâs the car repair man. âReally? I thought you said it was fixed.â Apparently something else came up. âOkayâŠhow much longer will it be in repair?â Much longer than you had thought. âAnd how much will it cost?â Much more expensive than you had thought. âI donât know what to say. I mean, really, I feel as though every time Iâm on the line with you all, I have to wait longer to get my car back, and the bill just racks up higher.â Theyâre trying their best. âI know. Is it necessary to fix in order to drive, though?â State laws require it. âOkayâŠthanks for the update.â And then you hang up without another word, and with all the frustration in the world.
You head back inside and grumble about your car woes to Mina and Nobara, who try their best to respond with interest.
âWhy canât your insurance cover it?â Mina asks.
âApparently they canât claim itâs because of those rocks I drove over,â you sigh, âsince it looks like itâs been a problem for longer than that.â
âCan you afford it?â Nobara asks.
âNot really,â you say. âIâll just have to postpone having my car for a bit.â
You sigh with a glance out the window of this fine dining establishment, into the blue skies just beyond, head drowning out the voices of Mina and Nobara as they continue to grill you about all sorts of questions that you donât have the energy to answer right now. You had another student loan payment to make once you got home today, and just the thought of it makes your heart drop a little. And you realize you just canât afford to be picky about your financial situation anymore.
â
âThanks for helping me out with this,â you say, footsteps over familiar grassy hills as you head towards the UTokyoâs practice field, your digital Canon EOS hanging from your neck.Â
âSure,â Kai says as he keeps pace next to you, âwhy the sudden mission, though?â
Youâre gazing off straight ahead, a nervous pit in your stomach since itâs been a while since youâve walked across this landscape towards the field.Â
âI just feel like I need to diversify my income somehow,â you sigh, the buzzwords leaving a bitter taste in your mouth as you say them but it was the reality of your situation, âto make ends meet. When you mentioned freelance work during our conversation last week, it made me think itâs time for me to pick that up too.â
Kai hums. âYeah, itâs a good plan. Iâll try to show you what I know.â
Once youâve made it to the top of that hill, the one that oversees the field, your eyes instantly scan the field for familiar silhouettes, and your breath catches in your throat when you spot Gojo passively kicking a ball back and forth between one of his teammates for warm-ups.
Itâs the second time youâve seen him since that argument the two of you had in the hotel lobby, the first being at the post-game conference in which you did everything in your power to swiftly avoid him, and you plan on keeping that up. Thereâs also an urge to run away, but youâre starting to realize thatâs not much of an option anymore.
âHonestly, you donât really need to worry too much about shutter speed with freelance like you do for shooting sports,â Kai is mumbling next to you as he messes with the settings on his camera, the two of you making your way down the hill towards the field, and youâre not really listening because your eyes are on Gojo, whoâs yelling something across the field to his teammates with a look of concentration on his face.
âUh huh, I see,â you say. You see Kai glance at you in his periphery.
âYou again!â you hear a familiar harsh voice call out, and you turn on your heel to face Coach Yaga whoâs standing a few feet away in his custom UTokyo tracksuit with his arms crossed against his chest. âWhy are you on my field?â
You hold your breath for a second. âHi, Coach Yaga, so sorry, but Iâm just here to take some more photos.â
He lets out one of his hmphs, unrelenting. âYouâre a distraction. Get off my field.â
âD-Distraction?â
âCoach!â Suddenly, Getoâs in your line of sight as he emerges with a light jog up to your side. âYou should really be nicer to our photographers, they give us a lot of publicity for our games. And publicity means funding.â
Coach Yaga narrows his eyes. âI need all my players focused right now. Even during practice.â He gives you a disapproving glance and youâre still confused, but also weirdly angered.
âExcuse me, Coach Yaga, but last time I checked, this field is technically open for all students. And Iâm a student,â you say to him, crossing your arms across your chest now. âSo, I can be here if I want.â
You have no idea if thatâs true at all, but sometimes youâve just gotta fake it âtil you make it.
Coach Yaga grumbles something and then waves his hands in the air. âFine! Iâve no bandwidth to argue about this anymore! Just donât distract my players.â
Youâre shocked that it worked, and Geto nudges you with an elbow to correct your expression so that Coach Yaga doesnât catch on to the bullshit you just spewed.Â
âAre you here to take some photos?â Geto asks, facing you. Heâs got his hands on his hips, breathing slightly fast, some of his hair falling onto his forehead.Â
âYeah, I am, just for practice though. Iâm here withââ you glance at Kai, whoâs standing with his fists shoved into his pockets, âKai. Heâs also with the newsletter.â
Thereâs a moment where Geto studies the two of you for a second before speaking. âI know,â he says, extending his hand out for Kai to shake, which he does, âI think Iâve seen you around. Not sure if weâve formally met, but itâs nice to meet you.â
âYeah, likewise.â Kaiâs hand is then shoved back into his pocket.
You feel awkward suddenly, and then quickly say something to Geto about how he should probably get back to practice, which he agrees to, and then youâre standing at the chalk sideline with Kai as he shows you the ins and outs about digital photography.
âHave you tried shooting in burst mode?â he asks, switching the feature on your camera and then handing it back to you. You sling the strap around your neck.
âHmâŠâ you start, pointing your camera across the expanse of the field to multiple areas. The trees off into the distance, the goal posts, Coach Yagaâs yapping Pomeranian. âNot reallyâŠâ The grass beneath your feet, the sky above your head, and then blurrily focused before settling on Gojo who stood in the distance straight ahead.
You see through your viewfinder that heâs caught sight of you too, a look of surprise on his face seen only by the level of zoom, and you glance up from the screen to make eye contact with him in reality. Heâs fully staring at you, and you can barely see the way his expression relaxes from that one of athletic concentration to something wistful and strange that youâve had a hard time reading lately.
âCanon? Are you even listening?â
âHuh?â you snap out of it and look at Kai. âSorry. Could you repeat that?â You quickly glance toward Gojo again, and his line of sight points towards Kai now.
âI was asking if youâve tried panning before,â he says, reaching for your camera, pulling it towards him, but the strap around your neck means youâre pulled closer to him too.Â
âSatoru!â Coach Yaga yells in the distance. âEyes on the ball!âÂ
âJust got to set your camera to manual mode first,â Kai mutters, confusion in his voice. âWhere the fuck is it?â Heâs turning your camera in his hands, which only has you stumbling with another small step towards him, your chest pressed flush to his arm, and he looks down at you for a brief second with a smirk on his face.
You hear the sound of a ball being kicked on the field, followed by the shout of one of the players.
âAh, here, found it,â Kai says, handing your camera back to you, and just as youâre about to say thanks and you hold your camera up, youâre hit straight in the face by a flying object and fall backwards onto the grass with a painful thud.
What the fuck?
Where are you?
Who are you?
Okay, thatâs dramatic, it wasnât that bad.
Thereâs shouting in the distance as you hold your head with a groan, eyes shut tight with images of your life flashing behind your eyelids, and when you open your eyes again from where youâre sat up on the grass, youâre surrounded by soccer players.
Gojoâs suddenly in your line of sight, knelt down beside you and heâs holding your shoulders, trying to get you to look at him but youâre still blinking away the stars youâre seeing. âFuck, y/n, are you okay?â he asks, and you register the concern on his face.
âDude,â one of his teammates kicks the heel of his cleat, âwhere the fuck were you looking? It was clear as day I was tryna pass to you.â
Gojo grumbles something to him, his brow furrowed, and heâs lowering his head to try to make eye-level contact with you but youâre still holding your head with a wince.
âOh shit,â Kai comments, âsheâs bleeding.â
You pull your hand from your face to glance down at the wetness that you feel, and bright red color stains the tips of your fingers.
The next thing you register is Gojo picking you up off the hard grassy ground into his arms, and starts carrying you away down the field.
âW-What the hell are you doing?â you ask, his pacing across the grass is fast and you have to wrap your arms around his neck to keep from getting dizzy.
âIâm taking you to the hospital,â he says, voice strained in his throat, and youâve never seen him look so worried before.Â
âThe hospital?! Please donât, I donât have health insurance right now.â His face is so close and youâre distracted from the pain of your headache.
âYouâre bleeding on the face, Iâm taking you whether you like it or not,â he grumbles.
You dig your nails into his shoulder through the nylon of his shirt, and he hisses from the pain before stopping in his tracks. âI donât need to go to the hospital, Satoru, I just need a fucking bandaid.â
âYou could have a concussion.â
âA concussion?!â You kick your feet for him to let you down but his grip on you only tightens. âYouâre being ridiculous. Let me go, or Iâll bite you.â
He scoffs at that and continues walking forward. âYouâre gonna bite me? Thatâs the most threatening thing you could come up with?â
âIâm being so dead serious, Gojo Satoru. No hospital.â
He grumbles something under his breath at your use of his full government name, and then says âfineâ but heâs still walking down the grass until his cleats begin to tap on concrete, and then on what sounds like tile as he carries you into a building a few yards from the field.
He seats you on a cold counter, your hand gripping the faucet of a sink, and you finally take a comprehensive look at your surroundings. light blue, faint scent of chlorine in the air
âIs thisâŠa locker room? The men's locker room?â
He sighs, bending his knees a bit to look at your face closely. You flinch when his hand reaches out, and he pauses, but you relax slightly and then he rubs his thumb over your cheek. You feel the smear of a droplet of blood. âYes. I need running water.â He turns the faucet of the sink on to run his thumb under.
âFor what?â you ask. His thumb is running over your cheek again.
âTo take care of this cut.â He disappears behind a tile wall for a moment. You can hear metal clanking, probably of a locker opening and closing, and he re-emerges with a first-aid kit.
You slide your butt across the counter to the edge, about to hop off and make a run for it when he grabs your hips and puts you back into place. âDonât even think about it,â he grumbles. He leans forward, grips you strongly, and you see that heâs still breathing heavily from practice, strands of hair stuck to his forehead with sweat, and you can practically taste the salt on his neck.Â
You press your shin to the front of his thigh, desperate to put some space between the two of you. âI donât wanna be in here. Men are scary.â
âWell I canât take you into the womenâs locker room,â he says, ripping the packet of an antiseptic wipe open with his teeth, âIâd get registered as a sex offender.â
You attempt at an escape again, and heâs quick to get his hands on you to stop it.
âQuit manhandling me, or Iâll scream,â you threaten through gritted teeth, because youâre still mad at him. For everything.
âGo ahead,â he says, using his knee to spread your legs apart, then finds a place to stand between your thighs to get closer to you. âIâve got a lot of ways I could shut you up.â
You blink at him, breath catching in your throat, and the expression on his face tells you heâs not interested in dealing with your stubbornness anymore.
âJust hold still,â he grumbles, placing the packet down on your thigh and then stepping off to the side to wash his hands under the sink.
âWhat exactly happened?â you ask, watching him dry his hands off with a few paper towels. One moment, Kai was trying to explain good digital photography to you, and the next you were dizzy from being knocked back onto the ground.
âYou got hit by a soccer ball.â
âI know, but how?â You remember your camera hit your face from the impact too, and now youâre worried about it.
âIâŠwasnât paying attention when my teammate passed it,â he admits with a sigh, finding his place in front of you again, the knuckles of his clean hand brushing across your cheek, caressing. Your expression softens slightly. He uses a hand spread across the small of your back to push you forward to him, then he gently passes the wipe over your wound.
âOh okay so, you failed to protect me from a flying soccer ball.âÂ
He pulls his hand from you to read the lettering on the back of the packet. âIâm patching you up now, arenât I?â he says, annoyed. ââŠoh fuck, I was supposed to go in with water first.â
âSo glad to be in such good hands right now.âÂ
He gives you a pointed look, but you ignore it and turn your torso to see your reflection in the mirror for the first time. You had a small wound on your cheek, right over the bone, with some bleeding and itâs wider than it is deep. But when you look at Gojo again, whoâs putting some ointment onto a Q-tip now, the look of guilt and worry on his face makes you feel satisfied for some reason, and you wanted to make it worse.
âDoes it hurt?â he asks, brow furrowed, applying the cold gel to your cheek.
âMhm. A lot.â Not really, no.
âFuck. Iâm sorry,â he sighs, head dipping towards you slightly to get a better look, âcan you feel this?â
âAhh, yeah. Ouch. So much.â Barely.
His other hand is placed flat on the counter next to where youâre sitting, and you allow it when his thumb starts to run soothing circles over your hip.
âHmmâŠâ you start, wide eyes looking up at him as he seems to lean closer and closer to you with every word that leaves your lips, âI really wonder if itâll leave a scar.â
He looks tortured. His hand that was maneuvering the Q-tip in his hands drops to the counter now, and he brings his other one to your face, cupping your cheek. His eyes dart from the wound, thumb pressing at the plush of your cheek, and this time, it hurts a little so you wince. His expression is tense, some sort of inner turmoil you could read across his forehead, and then his jaw hardens.
âWho was that guy you were talking to earlier?â
You blink a few, then tilt your head slightly. You feel like youâre on a game show, where thereâs four options and only one right answer. New boytoy, gay best friend, fuck buddy, orâ âHeâs my coworker.â
âThatâs it?â
âMhm.â
âHas he tried anything funny with you?âÂ
You almost roll your eyes. âNo, dad, he hasnât.â
âWoah. Say that again but make it daddy.â
âHey just a quick question for you. Where do you get the audacity?â
His bent index finger finds a place under your chin, tilting your head up so youâre forced to look at him. âItâs your fault, really. I canât help it sometimes,â he says, voice lower now. Youâre squirming a little, wanting to push him away but his lips get close to your cheek, brushing near your wound, like he wants to make it all better somehow. âI really am sorry,â he whispers, near your ear. Thereâs a whimper you have to stifle in your throat. He pulls aways just enough to where he can look into your eyes. âA cutâŠâ he starts, thumb now passing over your bottom lip, âon your pretty face.â He sighs. You shouldnât, but when he prods, you tuck his thumb under your front teeth and your tongue presses slightly against the padded skin of it. He looks like heâs being driven to insanity, and his other hand has no shame at all in pulling you towards him, to seat you at the edge of the counter, and you miss the texture of his thumb on your tongue when he pulls it from your mouth. But itâs so he can dip his head down to kiss you instead.
Of course the sensation of his lips on yours only lasts for a second, because the universe really fucking hates (or loves?) you, so the loud clanking of a metal water bottle against tile interrupts with harsh reverberation throughout the locker room walls, and he pulls away from you when you jump at the sound.
You both turn your heads towards the origin, located at the curved end of the entryway hall, and one of Gojoâs teammates is standing there with his duffle bag slung around his neck and hanging heavily to his thigh, his water bottle clutched in his hand. He blinks at the two of you.
Oh. Itâs the one you kissed at that party a few weeks ago.
âWhatââŠWhy is there aââ his teammate starts, panicked, turning his head to double check the sign on the locker room wall as if heâs hallucinating, and when his eyes land on you again, they widen with recognition. His gaze shifts, and his chin tips down at the sight of Gojoâs irritated side eye from where he was still all up in your personal space. ââŠyou know what. Nevermind.â
His teammateâs eyes are on you again, and you give him a shy little wave, just a fluttering of your fingers in the air paired with a small smile, legs swinging back and forth under the counter. He lets out an amused scoff from the entryway, lifting his hand to return the gesture, some cheeky grin on his face as he then scratches the back of his head before turning on his heel to leave the locker room, out of sight. You let out a sigh, hand dropping to your lap, and you donât need to look at Gojo to tell that heâs staring at you with disbelief.
âWhat the fuck was thatââ
âYou,â you interrupt him, finger jabbing at the center of his chest, âhave seriously got a lot of fucking nerve,â you hop off the counter, âto not only allow a soccer ball to sock me in the face,â heâs taking a step back with every harsh jab of your finger, âbut to also hold me hostage in a mensâ locker room,â his back is pressed up against cold tile wall now while he just looks down at you with wide eyes and something akin to fear, âand then, oh my god, the audacity to kiss me?â
âIââ
âI donât wanna hear it!â you yell, which shuts him up. âYou really are just a fucking player.â
Heâs stiff, not wanting to catch a punishment from you right now.
âBut it doesnât matter,â you grumble, still drilling your finger into his ribcage with the intent to cause pain. You didnât need to be this close, but his body is warm, probably due to the blood pumping from practice, and it feels nice to be pressed up against. âBecause I donât have feelings for you anymore, so just fucking get over yourself.â It was a lie if youâve ever told one, but you wanted to believe it so much that it could come off as the truth.
His eyes narrow down at you, eyebrows flattening. âYou donât have feelings for me anymore?â
âNo, I donât.â
âI donât believe you.â
You roll your eyes. âWhy? Because you want me to keep suffering?â
He grabs your hips, then makes a motion that is evident of his desire to pull you flush to him, but he stops himself. Thereâs a moment where he just takes a few deep breaths and looks at you with a hardened expression, then a split second where his eyes fall to that little cut on your cheek, and every single feature of his face softens, and then he lets you go.
You take a small step back, breathing heavily of your own, and you feel the ghost sensation of his fingertips wrapped around your hips. It makes you feel dizzy, and your thoughts are a mess.Â
He sighs. âSorry. For the soccer ball, and this locker room. But Iâm not really sorry for kissing you, and if that makes me a jerk, then so be it.â
Your heart is beating fast. âYou are a jerk, Satoru,â you say. He doesnât like you, he doesnât want you. A mantra played over and over in your head that youâve started to hear it at night. âA real fucking jerk.â And you leave him standing there in a way that feels like the hundredth time.
â
2:34pm kaito (work): yo
2:34pm kaito (work): i had my guy look at your camera
2:35pm kaito (work): itâs pretty fucked up
2:37pm you: :( oh okay isee. does he have an estimate for the fix? the lens is okay though right?
2:39pm kaito (work): yeah lens is fine, you should really count your blessings on that.Â
2:40pm kaito (work): but nah, fix would be around the same as the cost of it, so youâre better off getting a new one
2:42pm you: i donât have thousands of yen laying around unfortunately. my car bill has sucked me dry
2:44pm kaito (work): well let me check with him. maybe he can hook you up with a good deal on a used one
2:45pm kaito (work): i got a 50% off on one of my canon cameras i bought from him a few years back. maybe heâs still got some like that
2:46pm you: yes could you check with him please? thanks so much, really
2:48pm kaito (work): sure. although i think the guy that kicked the ball to your face should be paying for your camera replacement
2:51pm you: they were just practicing. itâs their field
2:56pm kaito (work): alright. btw, you free tonight?
You blink at your phone screen from where you were sprawled across your bed. Before you have a chance to type out a response, your phone lights up with a phone call from kaito (work). You accept the call.
âOh, hi,â you say.
âHey, are you free tonight?â
âOh uhh, I was just about to check my schedule.â You shake your head at your inability to come up with an excuse on the spot.
âOkay,â he says on the other line. You hear the sounds of cars honking in the distance. âWell let me know. I just left my camera guyâs shop, and he was telling me about how one of his friends does visuals for a short-film director, and that the director is looking for an assistant.â Kai grumbles something about someone he walked past being rude. âI think the directorâs agency is Verve Films, so.â
You sit up in bed, eyes wide at the mention of the name. âOh, oh wow. Thatâs insane.â
âYup,â he says, âanyways, apparently the director is busy as fuck, so he left the hiring process up to my camera guyâs friend. I told him I knew someone that might be interested. Are you?â
You take a deep breath in and out. âYeah, I am. Most of my experience on my resume lines up with short-film, so Iâd be able toââ
âAlright great,â he interrupts, âso we can hold the interview tonight.â
âWe?â you ask.
âWell yeah, me, my camera guy, the hiring guy. Maybe go for drinks or something.â
Your brow furrows. âThat hardly sounds like an interview.â
Kai sighs. âWell, itâs not an interview for a desk job or something. Itâs more of likeâwell, like building connections. I know you know all about that, since Utahime got you the newsletter job.â
Well, yes. She put a word in for you, which helped get the interview, but you still went against qualified applicants. âI guess.â
âItâll be like that. Most opportunities youâll get if you still want to pursue filmmaking are going to be like that,â he tells you, âif it feels informal, it means youâre doing it right. You might not think so now because youâre still in school, where they practically serve opportunities to students on platters, but itâs going to be different in the real world.â
You lay your head back onto the pillow, feeling like youâre receiving a lecture you didnât ask for, and your first instinct is to pretend that you know better than he does. But when you think about all the stress recently, all of the not knowing, and the unsure, you question if you should start leaning into the advice of the people around you, and start to accept this career path for what itâs known to be. Unruly, unconventional, and a lot of times, unfair.Â
âI see. Well, can I think about it? Tonight is too soon, Iâd need time to research the director, put a portfolio together, and also do some interview prep,â you say, pulling your phone from your ear to glance at the time.
âWell, tonightâs the only night that works since their teamâs shooting abroad for the weekend and they leave tomorrow morning,â he says.
You purse your lips together.
âBut also,â Kai says, ïżœïżœïżœitâs the nice thing to do, yâknow, since my camera guy is taking the time to look at your camera for free, you could at least help his friend out. By the way, he just texted me, he does have some used Canons available at discount.â
You close your eyes for a second, just trying to process this conversation right now. Kai was speaking too fast, hardly enough time for you to even think.
âSo do you want to do the interview tonight?â
âYes, sure. Okay. Justâ just send me the details. Iâll be there,â you say.
âAlright cool, will do.âÂ
You say bye, and then he hangs up.
A few hours pass by, where you spend some time putting together a flash drive of a couple of your best short films youâve worked on in the past with other directors, as well as a portfolio of some recently developed film photography. The last thing to do was grab your emergency stash of print outs of your resume, and then you stuff it all into a folder before glancing at the mirror to take in your reflection. It felt extremely weird to show up to a job interview in something as casual as what you were wearing right now, but Kai insisted to not wear anything business. But at least you opted for jeans that donât have any DIY holes in them.
Your face is glued to the navigation on your phone screen the second you get out of the taxi, and you walk down the bustling nightlife streets of Tokyo to get to this bar that Kai sent you the address of. But just as youâre about to turn the corner to your destination down the bar strip, you bump into someoneâs chest due to lack of paying any proper attention.
âAhâ Iâm so sorry,â you say, your grip on your phone tightening when you realize it was about to get knocked out of your hand, and then you look up to see a familiar face.
âOh!â Geto exclaims from where heâs standing right in front of you, âYouâre everywhere, y/n. What are you doing here?â
You open your mouth to speak, hesitate for a second, and then continue. âIâm here toâŠget drinks with some of my friends.â
He gives you a smile. âThatâs nice. I am too.â He points over his shoulder to behind him. âNanami got into his MBA program earlier this week, so, Satoru, Choso and I are buying him a few rounds. Or possibly a million. The plan is to incapacitate him as punishment for giving up on playing in the national league with us.â
You humor him with a laugh. âThatâs sweet. Or not? Well anyway, tell him I said congrats.â Your heart starts to beat a little faster, because from the direction Geto came from, it meant Gojo was likely just around the corner somewhere. âWhere are you heading to now?â
âWeâre bar hopping, and I think I forgot my phone at the last one we went to over there,â he says, pointing across the street. âSo Iâm going to go look for it.âÂ
âOh alright,â you say. âGood luck with that. Iâm going to go find my, uh, my friends.â
Geto tilts his head at you and had a slightly more serious expression on his face, glancing at the folder in your hands. âThanks. And stay safe.âÂ
You nod at him and then walk past him to round the corner onto the street that had groups of people loitering in front of restaurants, bars and all sorts of establishments as they wait in the cold to get inside or be seated. You recognize the name on one of the signs hanging as the one Kai sent you in his message, and when youâre a few feet away from it, you spot Kai. Heâs wearing his typical street photographer wear, with a red flannel over a gray shirt and pants that are possibly a size too big for him, but thatâs likely the style he was going for. Heâs standing with two other people.
âHey,â you greet Kai first, who has a pleasant look on his expression before he greets you back and gestures to the two people he was with.
âYo, this is Junichi, my camera guy,â he says. âDonât bother shaking his hand, heâs a germaphobe. Gotta keep âem clean for the electronics.â
âOh,â you say. Junichi is a big man, broad shoulders and thick muscles. His neck is almost as thick as his bicep, and he has no hair on his head. His arms are crossed. âItâs nice to meet you. Thank you for taking a look at my camera.â
He nods at you in acknowledgment. âSure thing. Pretty Boy here says you want to buy one of my used Canons. I donât refurbish them, so youâd better know how.â
Kai sighs, nudging Junichi a little with a fist. âRelax, dude, we can talk about that later. Also, stop calling me that.â
Your eyes flicker to the right, where another man stood, who you assume was Junichiâs friend and this Verve Films directorâs visual effects specialist. Heâs similar in stature to Kai, with that casual artist look, and he has a scuffle of facial hair littering his jaw in less of an intentional fashion but rather a five-o-clock shadow fashion. You vaguely register the scent of weed, familiar to the one that lingers in the photo lab on campus after class hours. He reaches his hand out to you first.
âHi, Iâm Ren. I work in visual effects for director Akira Ko at Verve.â
Your eyes widen as you shake his hand. âThatâs amazing. Iâve studied a lot of his contemporary works, Iâd love to learn more about his process.â
Ren lets a fast exhale out through his nose. âYeah, youâll learn a lot under him.â He pauses to shove his hands into the pockets of his jacket. âMost of his assistants always do.â
âWeâve been waiting for too damn long,â Kai interjects before you could ask any questions about the assistant position, and he glances at his watch, âand thereâs still a lot of people ahead of us.â
You glance around to the small groups of people gathered in front of this bar on a lively Friday night, eyes jumping from one area to the next, until a familiar silhouette catches your eye.
You see Gojo standing with Nanami and Choso a few strides away, near the lamppost. Heâs mostly turned away from you, Nanami nudging his arm annoyed at something he said, and the sound of his laughter in the air makes your heart feel like itâs at stray. Like that was where you were supposed to be right now, not here.
You watch him from the distance as he sighs, shrugging his shoulders up and down slightly before crossing his arms when Choso gestures towards the entrance of the bar, and so he looks in that direction too. Heâs frowning slightly and he brushes some of the hair fallen over his forehead away from his eyes, in that boyish way that makes your heart skip a beat, and you know heâs just doing it to see a little bit better, but it makes you want to cry.Â
Geto walks up to them and rejoins their little circle, and holds his phone up in the air, and then thereâs the melody of their voices bouncing off one anotherâs again. Geto rests his elbow up onto Gojoâs shoulder, leaning in a bit closer to tell him something, and when Gojo hears it, you see his entire body tense before his wide eyes are searching his surroundings, until those eyes land on you.
Your breath catches, and you hold his eye contact for only a moment before you look away, because it almost felt like too much to bear.
âWhatâs that folder in your hand?â Ren asks you, and you turn completely to face him so you canât see Gojo in your periphery at all anymore.
âI just brought some of my work, for yourâer, I guess Mr. Koâsâreference if heâd like to see it after todayâsâŠinterview,â you say. âThereâs a flashdrive, too.â
Ren has an amused look on his face and he shoves Kaiâs shoulder with his palm. âDude, you didnât tell her?â
Kai shakes his head. âTell her what?â
âOhh, I see how it is,â Ren muses.
âWhat?â Kai asks, starting to sound annoyed.
Ren tips his chin up slightly to study Kaiâs face, and then his look of amusement dissipates into one of understanding. âNothing.â
âTell me what?â you prod.
âJust that you didnât really need to bring all of that with you,â he says. âSorry for the trouble.â
You shake your head. âItâs fine, but if you could still give it to himââ
âIâm surprised Kai suggested someone when I asked if he knew anyone,â Junichi jumps in, âIâm used to him grumbling on and on about how shit the work is in filmmaking. Wouldâve thought heâd convinced you to look the other way by now.â
You blink at the gruff man, then look at Kai, and heâs just staring down at the dirt of his shoes. âWell, we had a conversation about it. But Iâm pretty set on what I want to do,â you say.
Kai lets out a scoff. âYeah, I donât really know how else to warn you about the shit show youâre in for, but if you want to be in debt to grad school for the next couple decades of your life, then itâs up to you.â
âHey, jackass, try to be a bit nicer,â Ren speaks up. âSheâs got some goals. Big fuckinâ deal.â He turns to you. âAlthough, heâs got a point sweetheart, schoolâs not going to get you anywhere in this industry.â
You frown. âA lot of directors I look up to went through graduate schooling. Most, I would say. I donât understand where this rhetoric is coming from.â
âItâs coming from real people with real experience,â Ren says, and you dislike the way he takes a step closer to you to reiterate his point, âhonestly, you should save yourself some time and give up on applying. Itâs not worth it.â
âIâve already put my application together,â you say, brow furrowing slightly, âIâve asked professors for my references, spent the past four years working on my profileââÂ
âBut working under a director, I mean really getting to work under one, beats all of that. Which is why youâre here, right?â Ren asks, but itâs not curious, itâs testing.
You feel a sheen of sweat build at your forehead, even in this cold, and you clench your hand into a fist once, twice, thrice. Youâre breathing fast, and the three sets of eyes that are staring so scrutinizingly into your soul right now have you faltering, like if they took another step forward, tried to intrude what you thought you knew one more time, youâd fall backwards over the cliff.
Suddenly, a hand wraps around your upper arm, and when you turn your head to the left, you see Gojo standing there.
âHey,â he says to you, sparing one single sidewards glare towards Kai, who immediately averts the eye contact, before Gojoâs eyes are on you again, âcan I talk to you for a second?â
You look at the three men in your circle, who suddenly adopt skittish body postures, and Gojo doesnât really wait longer than a few seconds before heâs pulling you away from them over towards the edge of the curb towards the street.
âWhat?â you ask once he lets go of your arm.
âWhat are you doing here with those guys?â he asks.
âIâmââŠwhy does it matter to you?â you ask.
âIt matters to me because of the fucking absurd conversation I just overheard,â he says, ânow answer me.â
His tone annoys you, and you cross your arms. âAre you eavesdropping?â
âIâm going to ask you one more time,â he says, taking a step forward to you, âwho are those guys, and why are you here with them?â
You blink at him, furrowed brows relaxing slightly as you drop your crossed arms to your side, and you stare straight ahead at the blankness of the white t-shirt heâs wearing, as your mind runs blank to his question. Why were you here with them? Was it because you had no other plans? Was it because the opportunity sounded too good to be true, and you just had to see for yourself? Was it because youâve been unable to sleep at night from all the stress, the financial worries, the rejection, and you just want to finally feel like youâve done one good thing for yourself? To feel like youâre at least making one step in the right direction, no matter the cost?
âIâm here for a job interview,â you say to him. Your tone is flat, and you feel numb.
âA job interview?â he asks, with just about as much incredulity you wouldâve expected to hear from him at that answer, âAt a bar? How does that make any sense?â
âItâŠâ you start, âsounded fine.â
âIt sounds shady as fuck.â
âThis doesnât concern you, okay? IâmââŠIâm just trying to make my goals work for me, Satoru, and I really donât expect you to understand.â
âWhy wouldnât I understand?â he asks. Thereâs confusion in his voice, and maybe even a little bit of hurt.
âBecause you canât even understand how unfair and painful it is for me that you keepââ you have to purse your lips together briefly to fight back the knot in your throat, ââŠthat you keep interfering with my life everywhere I go.â
His expression softens, and he silently stands in front of you for a moment. His eyes dart across your face, and then he reaches out to grab your hand. âListen, if you still want to get drinks tonight, then just get drinks with us. But donât hang out with those guys. Theyâre bad news, especially the dude with the flannel, and I donât think youâre in a good place right now to see that.â
Your eyes see white fury at that, and you all but snap. Because the irony of this whole situation, is that youâre not in a good place right now because of him. Because of all the pain that heâs put you through, for promising to stay away but then always being near, for saying he doesnât want you but then acting like he does.Â
âYou know what I think, Satoru?â you ask through gritted teeth, yanking your hand from his grasp.
Heâs looking at you, studying. âWhat?â
You take a step forward, threateningly, and he takes a step back so that he steps off the curb and onto the road, and youâre at eye-level with him now. âI think that youâre jealous,â you say, eyes glaring daggers into his.
He blinks at you, almost dumbfounded for a moment before he says âwhat?â
âYouâre just fucking jealous that I seem to be moving on after you rejected me, because for some weird reason, you think itâs okay to not want me, and yet not want me to be with anyone else,â you say, practically hissing the words. âYou donât like seeing me with any guys other than you? You donât want to believe me when I say that Iâm over you? Youâre not sorry for kissing me? Even after knowing,â you take a pause to breathe, because you feel like you canât, âeven after knowing that I like you,â eyes blinking fast because you donât want him to see you cry right now, âyou know that I like you so fucking much, and that itâs hurtful, and that itâs wrongâ and even after all of that, you act the same, and still wonât promise me any commitment of your own.â
Heâs looking at you with an expression you canât read, but youâve lost all interest in trying to understand it anymore.
âYou donât want me hanging out with them?â you repeat after him, âIâm not listening to that. Because itâs possessive. And itâs wrong.â
At the mention of them, Gojo clenches his jaw. âThat has nothing to do with you and me, right now. What theyâre trying to convince you of doesnât make any sense, and it wonât help you achieve your dreams either, y/n.â
âYou donât know anything about my dreams, Satoru,â you say, just to hurt him. But you think about the sincere expression on his face the first time you met him when you told him that you wanted his help with your assignment. You think about the playful nudge of his elbow that night he stayed with you on the curb, and told you that you just had to try to put yourself out there, because you couldnât accomplish anything without facing your fears. You think about how heâs always the first to like every single one of the slideshows you post of your pictures on Instagram. You think about the adoration in his eyes, reflected off the moonlight through the hotel window, when you told him about a little cottage on the countryside, one youâve always wanted, and those eyes told you that he was really rooting for you. âYou donât know. Because youââ thereâs an echo of words in your head. Someone elseâs words, not yours, âBecause youâre a college athlete. Andââ you let out an exhale, âand you donât pay tuition.â
His brow furrows. Thereâs a beat of silence as his confusion settles in. âWhat?â
âYou were born blessed with talent, and youâre popular, and people adore you, and you donât have to worry about internships, or jumping from job to job just to make something of yourself,â you say, picturing your life in your head along with all the strife, âor about all of the sinking debt, and the worry, and theâ and the car repair bills,â you say, almost with a scoff, eyes sheening with tears, like youâre losing your mind, âall of the fucking car repair bills.â Your chest is heaving as you shake your head. âBecause youâre set for life as long as you kick a fucking ball.âÂ
His lips purse together, like he can tell thereâs more on your tongue to say, more hurtful words, and he wants to hear you say them. And so you do.
âYouâve never had to suffer or worry about a single thing in your life. So donât pretend like you understand what Iâm trying to do here tonight,â you say, inflection signing off on the end, to tell him that youâre done.Â
He stands in front of you, practically motionless except for the slow movement of his chest as he breathes. His expression, tense and hurt, softens slowly, and you see him digging his nails into the skin of his palms through fidgeting clenched fists at his sides. And then he relaxes them, too.
âDoes that make you feel better?â he asks.
His question confuses you, and for some reason, regret washes over you. âWhat?â
âDoes thinking of me that wayââŠdoes it make you feel better about all of this? Between us?â
Youâre breathing fast, eyebrows pinching upwards to look at him, and the defeated expression on his face makes your heart ache. Heâs waiting for an answer, and so you give him one. âYes.â
He glances down at the ground for a moment, then at your collarbone, before meeting your gaze again. âIâm sorry. For everything. And Iââ the words catch in his throat briefly, âIâll try to leave you alone tonight.â
His use of the word try doesnât escape you, but you give him a furtive nod, and he studies your face for a few moments before he steps back up onto the curb and walks past you. You watch him walk all the way, no longer with that confidence or conviction youâre so used to seeing in him, as he steps back into his circle, to Getoâs side. Geto gives a small glance over his shoulder to look at you with discerning eyes before looking at Gojo again, and then heâs turned away from you.Â
Heavy feet drag you back to Kai, Ren, and Junichi, and you feel feverish. They mention something about the table being ready, and you nod. The bar is rustic, with more tables than barspace, and the four of you are seated and then presented with a small food menu. Youâre seated next to Kai, Ren is right across from you, and Junichi is to his right. You watch a waitress usher Nanami, Choso, Geto and Gojo to one of the tables as well, two away from yours, and you forcefully blur your vision so you donât have to catch sight of the expression on Gojoâs face.
âSo,â Ren speaks up as his eyes peruse the food menu and Junichi waves the waitress over to order a round of sake, âtell me more about your experience, sweetheart.â
You blink at him, eyes feeling heavy, heart feeling heavy. âIâd prefer it if you called me by my name.â
Ren lets out a coo, and you briefly glance at Kai whoâs shaking his head with a sigh. âMy bad, y/n. Your experience?â
Your hands play with the folder sitting in your lap. âI started writing screenplays for small-scale directors when I was a freshman, and was greenlit on a couple into my sophomore year. One of the films I worked on, I had directing credits for, and it was nominated for best screenplay at Etoile Film Festival the year following.â
Ren swallows slightly, shifting in his chair and pushing his shoulders back, like heâs trying to establish himself now. Kai is clenching a fist on the surface of the table.
Ren clears his throat before speaking again. âWow, okay, so youâve actually got some serious shit going on.â His voice is a faux octave deeper. âWhat do you know about being a good assistant? Ever worked in customer service? Secretary?â
âOh, I mean I have worked in customer service, but I wasnât done sharing about my experienceââ you try to say but Junichi cuts you off.
âFirst roundâs on me,â he declares, âfor bringing her out here.â He tips his chin to you and then sends Kai a glance.
A waitress brings by a bottle of sake, and Junichi begins pouring drinks into the glasses, then slides them across the table. Kai gives Ren a pointed look.Â
âDonât get too wasted,â Kai says to him as he brings his glass to his lips, âyou start running that mouth of yours a little too much when you do.â
Ren grins at him and immediately knocks down the glass Junichi barely finished pouring from him in one go, and the gruff man beside him is grumbling. âWhatever you say.â
Something had been bothering you since you came here. âWait,â you say, pointing between Kai and Ren, âdo you two know each other already? Because,â you turn to look at Kai, âon the phone earlier, you sounded like you didnât.â
Kaiâs eyebrows raise in surprise, as though heâs discovered you have some skill for foresight. You glance at Ren, and he gives Kai a puzzled look.
âUh, yeah. Iâve known Kai for years,â he says, âwe go way back. We went to highschool together.â
Kai shifts a little in his chair. âSorry. Probably forgot to mention it.â
You glance down at the glass of sake in front of you, and the way it twinkles under the lighting of the bar. You slowly bring it to your mouth, taking a small sip, and the way it coats your tongue is less than pleasing.Â
âCan you tell me more about the assistant position?â you ask Ren, whoâs emptied out the bottle of sake and waving someone over to order more. He already has a slightly flush to his face.
âYeah, yeah, will do,â he says, âbut first, let me tell you about what I do in visuals.â
Another round of sake is dropped by, and then another, followed by another, as Ren continues to ramble on and on about what he does for work, and how itâs entirely integral to the final piece of the film, although youâve never really had a terrible level of appreciation for visual effects in short-film craft, since itâs hardly much work. But you wouldnât say that, you just continue to nurse your one glass of sake as the three men surrounding you knock back more and more, and thereâs slurs to their speeches now.
âSooo, Iâm so sorry, sweetheartâI mean y/n, for cuttinâ you off earlier,â he says, âbut what was that experience you wanted to talk to me about?â Ren asks from across the table, and his eyes are all traveling over you.
âIâŠâ you start, âwell, I started to work with one of my professors last year, sheâs a two-time Cannes Film Festival winner, and she let me under her wing for one of her projects last year.â
âWho is she? Oh wait, nevermind, probably wouldnât have heard of her anyways,â Ren says, but when you fail to laugh, he waves his hand in the air. âJoking, joking. Whatâs her name?â
âNaoko. Naoko Ogigami.â
âOh shit. I have heard of her,â Ren says, followed by a shallow hiccup. Junichi shrugs his shoulders, and when you look at Kai, heâs nodding slowly and toying with the rim of his glass with a finger.
âYes. Well, anywaysââ you start up again, before Kai sets his glass of sake down particularly loud.
âThis is all bullshit. Really. I told you, filmmaking is a waste of time. Just focus on your photography, and your freelance or whatnot,â Kai says, grit to his jaw, face looking red with possibly something other than just a tipsiness.Â
Ren lets out a laugh. âFuckinâ Kai. What a pessimist. Donât listen to him, sweetheart,â he says, slurred, and you furrow your brow at him with a glare, âsorry. Donât listen to him. Trust me, youâll learn a lot under Mr. Ko. Heâs a suuuper nice guy.â
âWhatâs the compensation?â you ask. Itâs a brazen question, one youâd never ask so soon in a formal interview process, but this table was hardly anything formal.
âReal good. Mmm I think likeâŠ5200 yen an hour, and then also, you get your foot in the door.â
âOh,â you sit up a little in your chair. It was higher than most entry-level anything for undergraduates or even new grads.Â
âYeah, yeah, yeah,â he drawls when he sees youâre more interested. âGood stuff. Kai used to pick these kinds of jobs up, too, back in his college days. I remember. Although, heâs hardly Mr. Koâs type, so I doubt heâd be any good for this one.â
Your head snaps to Ren again at his words, face tensing.Â
âTell her about what a job like thisâhicâentails,â Ren says as he extends his glass out for Junichi to pour him another.
Kai glances at Ren once, and you watch him grind his teeth for a moment, and then thereâs a hint of a smirk on his face.
âOh. Yâknow, clerical work. Stuff like printing scripts out,â Kai starts, Junichi filling up his glass and then he raises it into the air to watch the liquid swish around, âgrabbing him coffee. Making sure his trailer is stocked.â
âBlowing him in said trailer,â Ren says. Itâs something quiet, under his breath with a small laugh, where you could barely hear it across the table. But you heard it nonetheless. And your heart sinks to the core of the earth.
âExcuse me?â you say. The benefit of doubt sitting on your shoulder, watching in disbelief as well.
âHeâs joking,â Kai says, quickly, ârunninâ his mouth.â
âOh fuck off, Kai,â Ren says, throwing his hands up in the air, âdonât act like thatâs not why you brought her here.â
Your head slowly turns to Kai, who canât meet your gaze. Your eyes flicker to Junichi, who looks amused.Â
Ren leans over the table, elbows resting on top, to look you straight in the eyes. Heâs got a sleazy smile, and you can smell the alcohol on his breath, and he dips his tone down low enough to where you can hardly hear it over the sounds surrounding you in the bar. âThatâs how youâll make it in this industry, sweetheart. Whether you like it or not, youâll be working under those directors until you make it.â
You stand up so fast that your chair falls behind you, hand raised in the air, and you swiftly slap the man across from you so hard across the cheek that it leaves his skin even more red than the flush from before, and your palm is stinging.Â
Thereâs gasps all around the bar, hushed voices, eyes on you, but you donât care. Thereâs not a single thing in the world you care more about right now than the anger swelled in your chest.
Ren holds his cheek, surprised, blinking like a pathetic animal. He almost looks like heâs about to cry, and you let out a scoff at the sight.
You turn to face Kai, whose eyes are wide and heâs staring up at you. Your fists are clenched at your side.
âIs this why you brought me here tonight?â you ask. Your voice is trembling, anxiety at the wake, the white anger spotting your vision. But thereâs also pain. So much pain, and youâre just so fed up with all of it. âBecause your belittling, condescending words werenât enough to tear my hopes apart, so you had to humiliate me in front of your friends instead?â
Kai holds his hand up. âWoah, Canon, relax. He was just jokingââŠâ Kai glances at Ren, whoâs still holding his cheek and biting down on his lip, and then his gaze hardens. âYâknow what? Itâs about fucking time you get this wake-up call, y/n. Iâve been trying to do the nice thing to steer you in the right direction, and the least you couldââ
âSteer me in the right fucking direction?!â youâre yelling now, registering the way your voice echoes in the bar. âYou know what I think this is all about, Kai?â You grit your teeth, âYouâre a sick, stupid, sexist fuck who didnât have the balls to go after what he wanted. So miserably pathetic that youâve got no other fucking business than to pull people down to your level.â
Kai pinches his eyebrows together, hand on the table clenching into a fist.Â
You lean down closer, an exasperated scoff leaving your lips. âWhy donât you go be his assistant instead? Since Iâm sure youâre good at taking it up the ass.â
Kaiâs eyes twitch, âyou fuckingââ
You grab his glass off the table and throw the alcohol into his face, eliciting another round of noises around the bar, and his mouth falls agape in shock before he gets up out of his chair, hand reaching out to grab for you. You close your eyes shut with a flinch to expect pain. Any sort of pain. But you donât feel anything at all.
When you open your eyes, you see Gojo standing to your left, veins of his arm tense with the tight grip he has on Kaiâs forearm, and you can see heâs practically shaking with rage. He steps in front of you, guarding, and you canât see the expression on his face, but the fear in Kaiâs eyes is enough to say it all.
âThatâs enough,â he says, the clench of his jaw evident through the strain in his voice, âtry to put your hands on her again, and Iâll split your fucking face in half.â
You can see Kaiâs breathing pick up from where youâre peering over Gojoâs shoulder, and then Gojo shoves him backwards right as Choso kicks the fallen chair to his feet so he trips over it backwards then hits the ground with a loud and indignant thud.
Gojoâs hovering over Kai, his hands shoved in his pockets as he glares down at him, while Geto and Nanami put space between you and the other two men at your table. You feel a searing flush to your cheeks. Youâre breathing fast, the peering eyes all around you are scrutinizing, looking at you with surprise, confusion, shock, and pity. Your mind is racing, and you wonder what your parents would think of all this. What your friends would think of all of this. What the people who support you would think of the fucked up situation youâve found yourself in, and the humiliation courses so deep through your veins that you just want to run away and hide. The ground could swallow you whole right now, and it still wouldnât be enough.
You take one step back, then another, before you turn on your heel to rush out the door into the night, and you barely register that itâs raining. You can feel your heart thumping fast in your chest and in your head, that familiar knot in your throat twisting tight as you walk fast down the street and ignore Gojoâs call of your name from behind you.
You donât want to see anyone right now. You donât want to be seen by anyone right now. Especially Gojo, of all people, because he was right about everything, and the fact that you had shut him down about it, and the way that you had shut him down about it makes your head numb and your breathing pick up fast.
ây/n,â you hear him call out from behind you, his pace is getting faster and so youâre resorting to longer strides as well, puddles of water splashing under your feet with every step, âjust waitââ
âIâm seriously,â you start, and the tears begin to fall, âIâm seriously so, so, so, so, so fucking embarassed right now,â you gasp out the words with no air left in your lungs to breathe as you continue to run away from him, âso please, just leave me alone.â
You can picture it all in your head. Something like I told you so from his lips, because after what youâve been put through tonight, you just want to assume the worst in people.
But just as you round the corner into an alley, feeling lost with the sight of a dead end, you feel a hand wrap around your arm and then youâre being pulled into an embrace.
Your eyes are blinking with tears streaming, your face buried in a chest that is warm, with a heart beating so fast that itâs keeping time with your own, and the fragrance that surrounds you is so painfully him that it makes you sob even more.
Strong arms wrap around you, pulling you closer, and Gojo rests his chin at the top of your head. âIâm sorry,â he says softly, and you can feel the rumble of his voice, âI just needed to stop you from running.â
Your arms are weakly raised, an outline over his torso but not yet grabbing on, until you hesitantly do. And when you hold onto him, itâs so tight and strong, and you realize that after everything between the two of you, itâs the first time youâve been wrapped in his arms.
âI feel so stupid,â you start, already hating the words because you want to be stronger right now, but you canât.
âYouâre not stupid,â he quickly corrects you, âthose guys are fucking insecure losers. Youâre just trying your best. You always have, for as long as Iâve known you, and itâs something you should be proud of yourself for.â
You donât know what to say to him, you just cling to the damp fabric of his shirt in the rain. Â
âThings are going to work out for you, no matter what, because I know youâve got what it takes and youâre willing to work hard for it,â he says, his chin nuzzling so youâre tucked into him even further, âand if things donât work out, thatâs okay, youâre strong and youâll always get back up. And I want to be there to help you through everything.â
You pull your face from his chest to stare up at him, droplets of rain falling to your face and making you flinch occasionally. âIâm confused.â
His hand comes up to cup your face, swiping at a tear on your cheek, or maybe it was rain. âI thought thatââ he starts, his thumb briefly running over the small cut still healing on your cheek, his brow furrowing, âI thought that Iâd be okay with watching your life from afar, through cropped pictures on a screen,â he says, a chill running through you, âbut I canât. Itâs killing me. And Iâm really sorry that it took me this long to tell you this, but I like you so much and I really want to be with you.â
Your eyes widen at his words, and you donât know how to feel. You push your face into his chest again. His thumb runs circles at your side through the dampness of your shirt.
âThere are a lot of reasons I didnât feel like I could date you, or show up for you,â he says, âbut the pain of not getting to be with you, of not getting to hold you, and just share my life with you is way worse than whatever reasons I kept trying to convince myself of.â
You nod slowly, because there was a part of you deep inside that knew that all along.Â
His grip on you relaxes slightly and you take that as a request from him for you to look up at him, so you do. âI know Iâve put you through a lot of pain, and Iâm really not a perfect person, but if thereâs room in your heart to forgive me, I promise you that Iâll do everything I can to make you feel happy and cared for.â
Your eyes study his face for sincerity. Theyâre words youâve been wanting to hear, words you couldâve pictured in your head, but the adoration in his eyes makes you realize you never couldâve imagined the true sweetness of those words when theyâre said from him.
You press your cheek to his chest again. Youâre not crying anymore. âIâm sorry for what I said to you earlier. About kicking a soccer ball, and having it easy,â you bite down on your lip, because now thereâs tears in your eyes again, âI didnât mean it.â You sniffle a little, âI know you work hard. And it was a really mean thing to say.â
He sighs, holding you flush to himself. His cheek presses against the top of your head. âThatâs okay, you donât have to apologize for that.â
âBut I do.â
There was no grudge at all. There was nothing withdrawn from you, nothing taken away as punishment. He just held onto you, exactly as you are, and you felt so safe in every second you spent in his arms.
You look up at him again. His hair is damp, strands clinging to his face in all the places they usually fall over, droplets of rain falling from his fringe onto your face and he does everything he can to wipe them away. âItâs too late,â you tell him, and he immediately knows what youâre referring to.
He just holds you closer. âI know.â
âI donât have feelings for you anymore,â you say through a sniffle.
He knows youâre lying, and that you say it just out of spite, but he holds your head to his chest. âI know.â
âYouâll have to beg and grovel, and even then, I might not like you ever again,â you say, gripping so tightly onto his shirt for purchase, your voice sounding muffled as you breathe in the scent of him. âThatâs your punishment.â
He presses a kiss to the top of your head. A firm press of his lips, lasting as he takes a few deep breaths. And then he kisses the same spot again, staying still in that position as he repeats himself.
âI know.â
--
a/n. phewww thank you for reading, i swear, this chapter felt like a goddamn war to write. my emotions were all over the damn place, i think cause i wrote from a place of bitter experience lol. i dedicate this chap to my lovely friend sheâs a film major (she inspired me to create this story) and i srs wouldnât be able to write kickoff without her đđ dear Mâ„ïž, i thought of you sm while writing this chapter, i can only hope iâve captured even the slightest bit of the understanding i will always aim to have of you, and that you feel seen. iâm incredibly proud of you, always rooting for you, so often thinking of you, and terribly missing you so much rn (plsssssss visit meeeđ©đ ) dedicated w sm love đ -bitchasshoe this chapter is also dedicated to anyone whoâs going through a hard times n maybe just trying to figure themselves out :â) i am so proud of you, you should be so proud of yourself, thereâs still so much to live and learn, and i hope the universe blesses you w everything youâve ever wanted!! big thank u to my lovely m00t @quinnyundertow she pulled me out of my writers block for this chapter and also beta read a lot of it for me thereâs only three chapters left for kickoff (iâm gonna cry just thinking ab it :â)) which doesnt sound like a lot but thereâs still a lot iâve got planned đ iâm just noticing that i very poorly planned the second half of this series. chapters 1-6 combined have less words than chapters 7-9 combined đ
âš sooooo i may increase the chapters from 12 to 14 by splitting them up to make it easier on me, or just stick to the plan and come out with long chapters like the last two. idk. iâll figure it out. thank u to everyone for reading i love you all dearly đđ iâll see you in the next one!!
âž take me to chapter ten!
âž wrote some kickoff headcanons here
--
taglist: @who-can-touch-my-boob @therealestpussyeater @lost-resonance @hojoslutoru @foulprincesscycle @luniunia @alekssashka7 @bsdicinindirdim @tsukikourito @getitsatoru @slut-4-gojo @cactisjuice @kissofife @tiredflame132 @cliosunshine @ethereally-lyann @btszn @prince-wyiilder @semra4 @gojosimp26 @drthymby @ninitoru @bbyxxm @fvsm4x @sadmonke @zoinks1010 @bakuhoethotski @horisdope @sykostyles @aquaberrydolphin @colouringfrogssittinginleaves @ri-sa20 @purplehallow11 @mwtsxri @ritsatoru @bxddiebloss @chwesuh-imnida @mo0nforme @viware @still-fking-single @megumisthirdog @gintokhi @karvokr @cierocanteat @imjustaweirdnerd @ronniebird @bloopsstuff @mwtsxri @witchbybirth @tetsuski @fffinskye @gh0ulkz @beabadobeee @mandysfanfics @erencvlt @laviefantasie @sukunamylovexoxo @girlkissersco @itzjuliana @yell0wdreams @1dimas7 @strayedjeno @mo0nforme @yungbloode @sullybrothersmate @oaooaoaoaoa @swagangelllamawolf @banenemilk @inniesblog
(hope i didn't miss anyone thank u all sm!!)
#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen fanfiction#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#gojo smut#jjk gojo#geto suguru#gojo satoru angst#nanami kento#choso kamo#series#yaga masamichi#alternate universe#college#college au#soccer#sports au#fraternity#sorority#tw drinking#partying#anime#romance#smut#fluff#angst#jjk smut#long fic#jjk series#ongoing series
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Jealousy, Jealousy
f1 grid x fem!reader
wc: 2.1k
warnings: just the guys being jealous, a lil uncomfortable situations ig,
authors note: sorry i took so long with this anon đ„čđ€! also sorry if this is bad for some reason i was struggling đ also ignore any typos any feedback is appreciated and please like, comment, and reblog!! hope you enjoy!! if you wanna join my taglist, click HERE!
f1 masterlist
Lewis
You were at a quaint bookstore in London, browsing through the latest bestsellers. Lewis was busy with a media event, so you decided to take some time to yourself. While searching the shelves, a charming young man approached you, striking up a conversation about the book you were holding.
"So, are you a Ana Huang fan?" he asked, flashing a friendly smile.
You smiled back, appreciating the casual conversation. "Yes, I love her Twisted series! Currently reading book 2."
"That's one of the best books!" he said, inching closer. "I can definitely recommend some more books similar to hers! Maybe if I could get-"
Unbeknownst to you, Lewis had wrapped up his event early and decided to surprise you. He walked into the bookstore just as you were chatting with the stranger. He immediately noticed the man's enthusiastic gestures and your engaged expression. His protective instincts kicked in.
He approached with a confident stride, sliding an arm around your waist. "Hey, babe. Who's your friend?" Lewis's tone was polite, but his eyes were intense.
"Oh, Lewis! This is Tom, we were just talking about The Twisted Series!" you said, trying to ease the tension.
Tom extended his hand, but Lewis's grip on your waist tightened slightly. "Nice to meet you, Tom. I'm Lewis."
Tom picked up on the vibe and quickly made his exit. "Nice to meet you too. I'll let you two enjoy your day."
As Tom walked away, you turned to Lewis, raising an eyebrow. "Is that a hint of jealousy I detect?"
Lewis chuckled, relaxing his hold. "Maybe a little. Can you blame me? He was cleary interested."
You kissed his cheek, reassured by his protectiveness. "Youâre cute when you get like this, you know you're the only one for me."
MaxÂ
You were at a trendy bar in Monaco with some friends, celebrating your movie premiere. Max was racing that weekend, so you hadn't expected to see him. While chatting at the bar, a guy approached you, complimenting your dress.
"That dress looks amazing on you," he said smoothly.
"Thanks," you replied, smiling politely.
Max, who had finished his practice session early, decided to surprise you. He walked into the bar and immediately spotted you talking to the stranger. His mood darkened as he saw the guy leaning in closer to you.
Max wasted no time, walking straight over and placing a possessive hand on your lower back. "Hey, schatje. Who's this?"
You turned, surprised and delighted to see him. "Max! This is Jason. He just complimented me on my dress."
Jason, sensing the tension, took a step back. "Nice to meet you, Max. You look beautiful Y/N, nice talking to you."
Max nodded curtly, watching Jason leave before turning his attention back to you. "What was that about?"
"Just a compliment," you said, smiling. "Why are you jealous?"
Max pulled you into a deep kiss, making sure everyone in the bar knew you were his. "No."
You laughed, hugging him tightly. "Yes you are, but itâs okay, I like when you get jealous. Besides you're the only one I want, Maxie."
CharlesÂ
You were at the university library, studying for an upcoming exam. Charles was away for a race, so you decided to focus on your studies. A fellow classmate approached you, asking if he could join you at your table.
"Sure," you said, moving your books to make space.
The two of you started discussing your coursework, but the conversation soon shifted to more personal topics. Just as the guy was about to ask you out for coffee, Charles walked in. He had flown back earlier than expected to surprise you.
He saw you laughing with the guy and felt a pang of jealousy. Charles walked over, his presence commanding immediate attention. "Hey, love. Mind if I join you?"
You looked up, surprised and thrilled. "Charles! Of course, sit down. This is Peter, we were just studying."
Peter quickly excused himself, sensing the unspoken tension. "I'll see you around, Y/N."
As Peter left, Charles took his seat beside you, his arm draped protectively over your shoulders. "Who was that?"
"Just a classmate," you said, amused by his reaction. "Jealous much?"
Charles sighed, pulling you closer. "Maybe. But I have every right to be, I mean look at you, you're gorgeous. Any person with common sense would want you."
You kissed his cheek, whispering, "You're adorable, Char! You never have to worry about that. Trust me, you're the only one I want."
OscarÂ
You were at a cozy café in Melbourne, waiting for your boyfriend. He had a busy schedule, but you managed to find time for a quick coffee date. While waiting, a guy at the next table struck up a conversation.
"Do you come here often?" he asked, clearly interested.
"Not really, just waiting for someone," you replied, hoping he would take the hint.Â
He leaned in a bit closer, a confident smile on his face. "Well, maybe while you wait, we could get to know each other better."
Oscar walked in at that moment, his eyes narrowing as he saw the guy leaning in closer to you as he spoke. He walked over, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. "Hey, baby. Ready to go?"
The guy quickly backed off, realizing he was intruding. "Oh, I'll leave you two to it," he said, standing up and walking away.
Oscar watched him go before turning to you. "Who was that?"
"I donât know, just some random guy," you said, smiling up at him. "You feeling okay? You look a little red?"
Oscar shakes his head, âYeah, yeah, Iâm fine.â Looking at him you say, âYou sure itâs not because you got a little jealous?â
Oscar chuckled, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "Maybe a little. I just can't stand the thought of anyone else getting your attention."
You hugged him tightly, giving him a short kiss. "You just have to get used to having a very attractive girlfriend baby."
âI guess I do.â he says cheekily wrapping his arm around your waist as you guys walk out.Â
CarlosÂ
You were in the pit lane, watching the preparations for the upcoming race. Carlos was busy with the team, so you decided to explore the area. A fellow fan, noticing your VIP pass, struck up a conversation.
"Are you here for the race?" he asked, clearly impressed by your pass.
"Yes, I'm here with my boyfriend," you replied, trying to be polite but distant.
"That's great," he said, undeterred by the mention of your boyfriend. "Is this your first time attending, or are you a regular?"
"Regular." you responded, hoping the conversation would end soon.
"Oh, so your boyfriend's rich, huh?" he remarked with a smirk.
"Uh, sureâŠyeah," you replied, taken aback and uncomfortable with his comment.
Carlos, having finished his briefing, spotted you talking to the guy. His protective instincts flared up as he saw him getting a bit too friendly.
He walked over, slipping an arm around your waist. "Hey, cariño. Everything okay?"
The guy quickly stepped back, realizing who Carlos was. "Oh, hey, big fan. Just talking about the race."
Carlos nodded curtly, his grip on your waist firm. "Enjoy the race."
As the fan walked away, you turned to Carlos, smiling. "Thanks for the save."
"No problem," he replied, his expression softening.
"You know, I love how protective you are," you said, leaning into him. "And maybe when you get jealous just a little. It's cute."
He chuckled, brushing a strand of hair from your face. "Lets go get some food, cariño."
LandoÂ
You were at a gaming convention, enjoying the various booths and activities. Lando was busy with a panel discussion, so you decided to explore. A fellow gamer struck up a conversation, discussing the latest games.
"Have you tried the new VR game?" he asked, clearly excited.
"Not yet, but it looks amazing," you replied, sharing his enthusiasm.
"Yeah, it's fantastic," he said, his eyes lighting up. "I wouldn't mind showing a beautiful girl like you how to use it sometime. It'd be fun."
Lando, having finished his panel, spotted you chatting with the gamer. Jealousy panned over him as he saw the guy flirting with you.Â
He walked over, slipping an arm around your waist. "Hey baby! What are we talking about?"
The gamer quickly felt the energy shift. "Just talking about the new VR game."
Lando nodded, his grip on your waist firm. "Cool."
As the gamer walked away, you turned to Lando, raising an eyebrow. "Really?"
Lando sighed, pulling you closer. "What?! Itâs not my fault he was interested in my girlfriend."
You smiled, kissing his cheek. "Key word in that sentence is âmy girlfriendâ."
SebastianÂ
You were attending a charity event, mingling with various guests. Sebastian was busy with the organizers, so you decided to socialize. A charming gentleman approached you, engaging you in a lively conversation about the event.
"It's great to see so many people supporting this cause," he said, smiling.
"Absolutely," you replied, enjoying the conversation.
He leaned in a little closer, his tone becoming more personal. "Especially when someone as beautiful as you is here."
You smile nervously, not expecting his direct approach. "Oh, thank you," you responded, trying to look around and grab Sebâs attention.
Sebastian, having finished his duties, spotted you talking to the guy, looking around. He saw the man getting too friendly and walked over to you.
He walked over, slipping an arm around your waist. "Hey, honey. Would you like a drink? Oh! Who's this?"
The gentleman quickly realized he was intruding. "Just talking about the event."
Sebastian nodded, his grip on your waist firm. "Enjoy the evening then."
As the man walked away, you turned to Sebastian, raising an eyebrow. "I love when you get protective, itâs hot, the jealousy too."
Sebastian smirked, pulling you closer. "Jealous? Me?! Donât know what youâre talking about."
You smiled, kissing his cheek. "Mhmm, yea, yea. Letâs get my drink."
JensonÂ
You were attending an award ceremony, mingling with various celebrities. Jenson was busy with interviews, so you decided to socialize. A charming actor approached you, engaging you in a lively conversation about the a.
"It's great to see so many talented people here," he said, smiling.
"Agreed," you replied, engaging in the conversation."All nominees this year were very talented and impressive."
He nodded thoughtfully, then leaned in a little closer, his gaze lingering on you. "Speaking of impressive, I couldn't help but notice how stunning you look tonight."
You chuckled softly, flattered but unsure how to respond. "Thank you, that's very kind of you."
He grinned charmingly. "So, are you here with anyone special tonight?"
Jenson spotted you talking to the guy. And started to walk towards you.Â
He walked over, slipping an arm around your waist. "Hey, baby. Who's this?"
The actor quickly realized you were taken. "Just talking about the event."
Jenson nodded, his grip on your waist firm. "Yea, itâs a nice thing."
As the man walked away, you turned to Jenson, raising an eyebrow. "Nice thing?"
Jenson sighed, pulling you closer so he can squeezing your waist. "Didnât know what to say without being rude so that's what came to my mind."
You smiled and kissed him gently. "Letâs go check out the catering at this 'nice thing'."
Daniel
You were exploring a quaint art gallery in Paris, enjoying the serene atmosphere and the beauty of the artwork on display. Daniel had left his phone in the car, leaving you to appreciate the art alone. As you admired a painting, a friendly gallery assistant approached, eager to discuss the artist's work.
"This piece here is quite exceptional," he said, gesturing towards a vivid abstract painting. "It really captures the essence of movement and emotion."
"It truly does," you replied, appreciating his enthusiasm. "The color blending and stippling is beautiful."
He smiled warmly. "You have a keen eye for art. Beautiful art for a beautiful girl."
"Oh, thank you," you said, trying to show no interest.
Daniel walked into the gallery, He approached, slipping an arm around your waist. "Hey, baby. Finding any new favorites?"
The gallery assistant reacted quickly to Daniel's presence and backed away. "Just discussing the beautiful artwork," he explained.
Daniel nodded casually. "Thanks for your insights, but we're good here."
As the gallery assistant politely excused himself, you turned to Daniel with a playful smirk. "Oh, someoness jealouss?"
Daniel chuckled softly, pulling you closer. "No, no. Protective, yes. Jealous, could never be me."
You smiled, leaning in to kiss his cheek. "Mhm hm, if you say so."
© 23victoria 2023-24 I all rights reserved. do not republish, steal repost, modify, translate or claim my work as your own
#êšàżvictoriaâs writings!! àżêš#lewis hamilton#lewis hamilton x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc x reader#carlos sainz#carlos sainz x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x reader#lando norris#oscar piastri#oscar piastri x reader#sebastian vettel#sebastian vettel x reader#max verstappen#max verstappen x reader#jenson button#jenson button x reader#daniel ricciardo#daniel riccardo x reader#f1 grid#f1#f1 one shot#f1 smau#f1 x reader#f1 fic#f1 x you#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 imagines
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Horny thoughts. Thatâs it.
Characters: Lyney & Neuvillette x Gender Neutral! Reader.
NSFW! MDNI
A/N: I did the quest, they made me horny. thatâs it, this is messy and not proofread so please ignore any grammar mistakes or typos. literally no plot just goes in.
Lyney is the type to like wall sex, like hold onto one of your legs and fuck you onto the wall as you try to stifle your moans under your shaking hands, as the people of fontaine move in the bustling streets while youâre getting your hole ruinedâŠ
he definitely puts a hand on your thigh, and winks at you before moving his hand up⊠up⊠and up to your sex at such a slow pace that it makes you want to grip his hair and yank his smug face into it and show him what happens when he teases youâŠ
but you canât, not when youâre having tea and macarons with Navia, and he fucking knows that, just smiles when you let out a gasp and Navia worries, asking if youâre okay. âOh donât worry!â he says, with his charming smile and a tinge of tease in his tone, âThey just couldnât sleep last night!â
and whose fault was that?!
you wish you could flip the table on him.
He loves going down on you, so much so that youâre starting to think he enjoys that more than fucking you⊠all whines, pleading for you to cum, he just wants to taste you, fucking drown in you until he forgets who he is, until his senses are nothing but you, you and you.
Grips your thighs, makes sure to keep his nails a little long so he can dig them in your thighs and hear you hiss, also loves grabbing your ass and pushing you even more to his face when youâre cumming.
Looking up at you with cum on his face or dripping from his lips or both, loves being branded by you.
âSo that magic show special I was talking abouââ
âI am NOT letting you go down on me on a stage!â
Neuvillette only likes having sex in your shared bedroom, you can drag him to your bathroom if heâs in a good mood but thatâs it.
Still, that man knows how to fuck all and any attitude from you, if you have any. Loves seeing you crying and begging if youâre so good for him. Either way, youâre getting overstimulated, he always makes sure you cry or beg in some form. He likes it.
He likes light bondage, loves cuffing your wrists, or holding your hands above your head while heâs giving you a pounding that makes you see stars behind your eyes and knocks all the air out of your poor body that you have to cry out for a break.
Loves seeing how your expressions change depending on what heâa doing, likes seeing your reactions, it gets him harder than anything else.
The way your eyes widen in surprise, letting out a gasp when he doesnât stop fucking you after you both came, you whine and cry, you babble on about how can he not even lose tempo and keep going with his thrusts as if he didnât just cum in you.
Cute. Youâre so cute.
Also into spanking, if you want it, just tell him, you donât have to misbehave. Though, he isnât gonna fuck you until you cum on his lap from his hand striking your ass until itâs so sore and numb that you canât feel it for a few days.
#genshin impact#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact lyney#genshin impact neuvillette#lyney x reader#lyney x you#neuvillette x reader#neuvillette x y/n#genshin impact x you#genshin impact x gender neutral reader#genshin imagines#genshin smut
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
definitely not old
Aaron Hotchner x Reader
A/N: Did I create an extremely improbable scenario just to suit my need to create another highly improbable scenario? Yes. Do I care that itâs unrealistic? No. Please forgive any typos/ grammatical errors.Â
CW: suggestive content, but not explicit (like 15+?). Use of y/n one time. (Technically this would probably warrant one of those hostile workplace environment seminars like they had for Derek and Penelope. But itâs funny? Idk this isnât serious.) Sassy Hotch. Crack plot tbh.Â
Also I know the timeline doesnât really make sense, because JJ is a profiler and Emily and Rossi exist, but I imagined Season 1 Spencer while writing this! I guess itâs 2005? Btw I do not know how tapes work, so just pretend it makes sense please. This is so unserious.Â
Summary: reader wife and Hotch are private people; the BAU team is nosy. Spencer is just constantly in the right place at the wrong time.Â
Enjoy!
ââââââ
The screen in front of you depicted horror - just not the kind the BAU was used to. The UnSub had confessed to leaving a message in an old tape. He had already been arrested, but you were all hoping it might contain something that might help the conviction stick. Only he was extremely paranoid, so not only had he left the message in a code, but he had spliced it into a tape he thought people were least likely to watch. His p***. It was the last thing to do for the case and everyone was trying to help. You all sit at the round table, and Spencer shifts in his seat, clearly uncomfortable. Derek laughs at his shyness and Emily laughs at the very unrealistic movements. She and JJ tilt their heads at the shape the two on the screen have put themselves into.Â
âThat does not look comfortableâ, JJ mocks.Â
The words are out of your mouth before you think. âTrust me itâs notâ.Â
Everyone at the table snaps their heads to look at you.Â
âDamn Mamaâ, Derek laughs. âWho are you doing these moves with?â
You try to hold back a laugh. You were not ready to share about your sex life with your colleagues, no matter how close you were. Plus youâre pretty sure Aaron would not appreciate it.Â
âThat is inappropriate workplace conversationâ, you say, pausing the video. âAnd youâre going to miss the next series of codeâ, you tell him, trying to get him to revert his attention back to the video. Emily grins at your attempted evasion.
âWe already got all the code. She just doesnât want us to tell Hotch sheâs capable of all that. Doesnât want to make the old man feel badâ.
âHeâs not old. Heâs only 5 years older than youâ, you remind her. She puts a hand on her chest in mock offense like youâve stabbed her. You roll your eyes. âAnd this is still inappropriateâ.
âSo it wasnât Hotchâ, Derek laughs.Â
âYouâre just annoyed because you havenât tried it yourselfâ, you deflect, moving to sit next to Spencer who seems to actually be doing his job.Â
âIâve seen her do yoga and sheâs very flexible, so if she couldnât do it I donât think you canâ, JJ tells Morgan.Â
âOh you have no idea what Iâm capable ofâ, he teases, which earns laughs from around the table. âIâm better than the old man for sureâ. They all start laughing and talking about you and Hotch.Â
You roll your eyes. âWasnât old in bed last nightâ, you mutter under your breath. You startle at the sound of a book hitting the floor and see Spencerâs bright red face. JJ, Derek and Emily look over in curiosity at what they might have missed, but you ignore them, attempting to give Spencer an apology for making him uncomfortable. He moves to drink his coffee in an attempt to avoid more of the conversation. Only he chokes on it because Hotch enters the room.Â
âHave you finished working out the code?â
Everyoneâs heads snap to him - JJ, Emily and Derek wearing matching grins. Hotch eyes you patting a coughing Spencerâs back.
âAre you alright?â, he asks.Â
âYes! Good! Iâm good!â, Spencer squeaks, afraid Hotch is going to ask him why heâs so nervous. Aaron looks to you for some answers but before you can tell him itâs nothing, Spencer suddenly stands up.
âGot the code! Going to call the local PD. DA is waitingâ, he warbles before you all watch him run out of the room. Hotch turns back to the rest of you.Â
âWell then that wraps it up. Go home now, get some restâ, he instructs. Everyone starts packing up. You and Hotch walk towards the door when he realises thereâs only 6 of you in the room.Â
âWhereâs Dave?â, he asks.
Youâre about to tell him Rossi went to the bathroom when the Italian walks back in. Rossi immediately notes the paused video.
âWow that looks uncomfortableâ, he remarks. Everyone smirks in your direction. Hotch snakes an arm around your waist and looks at the screen. Then at you.Â
âIt was, wasnât it?â
He smiles at the jaws dropping to the floor.Â
âGood night everyoneâ.
âââââââââ
A little bonus scene:
In his office later:
âYou heard us talking before you came in the room didnât youâ, you question your husband. He was so private, he wouldnât have said something like that otherwise.Â
âThey called me oldâ, Aaron grumbles, but his tone is amused. âJust wanted to shock them a littleâ.
You make your way over to his side of the desk, pulling him to stand up beside you.Â
âWell Agent Hotchner, I have to tell you, thereâs been some speculation about your performanceâ, you taunt. âCare to prove them wrong?â
âLast night wasnât enough proof?â, he laughs raising an eyebrow. You run your hands up his chest and behind his neck, pulling him close.Â
âThe results were inconclusiveâ, you tease. He grabs your hips and traps you between himself and his desk, his mouth trailing kisses down your jaw.Â
âWell I canât have that kind of speculation going aroundâ, he murmurs into your skin. Your breath hitches from the sensation of his lips on the sensitive spot on your neck. But instead of continuing, he pulls away and meets your eyes in a conspiratorial grin. âWe should do an in house evaluation as soon as possibleâ.
You open your mouth to reply when the door swings open, Spencer finding you sandwiched between Hotchâs thighs and your blouse rumpled. His mouth drops open and suddenly all 187 iq points mean nothing when his brain loses function.
âOh- I- um- sorry!â, he manages before running away. You stare at the slammed door then back at Aaron and burst into giggles. He drops his head to your shoulders and sighs.Â
âI feel like a teenagerâ, he groans.
âAt least you donât feel old.â
âââââââââ
Bonus bonus:Â
Still in the conference room:Â
âI want to go back to 10 minutes ago when I didnât know this informationâ, Emily moans.Â
âI think I need 5 more minutes before I can form a coherent thoughtâ, JJ laughs in disbelief. Spencer walks back in.
âI finished my report. Whereâs Hotch and y/n? Can we go home?â
âProbably doing it in his office for all we knowâ, Derek mutters.
Spencerâs brows furrow in confusion. âDoing what in his office?â
Rossi raises an eyebrow at Emily. âIs this kid serious?â
She shrugs back at him.Â
âSpence, Hotch says we can go home. But you should probably report about what local PD told you before you goâ, JJ tells him.
Spencer nods and makes his way to Hotchâs office. The rest of the team watch him walk away.
âYou think we should have told him to knock before going in?â
âProbably.â
The sound of a high pitch yelp and the slam of an office door echo down the hallway.Â
âOops.â
ââââââ
thank you for reading :)
masterlist
#criminal minds#bau team#aaron hotchner#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotchner x reader#emily prentiss#spencer reid#derek morgan#jennifer jareau#crack fic
898 notes
·
View notes
Text
hoju (home)
pairing: bang chan x female reader
summary: even though chan has been living in korea for so many years, he still considers australia to be home. when he finally has the opportunity to go back and visit, he can't wait to bring you along and introduce you to the people and places that he grew up with.
word count: 4.3k
warnings: none :)
a/n: hoju (ížìŁŒ) is the korean word for australia.
this was a request from my sweet 𩩠anon! thank you for the inspiration, i had fun writing this and i hope that it meets your expectations. sorry that i did not write this in chan's pov đ
as usual, please let me know if there are any typos or mistakes because i didn't have the chance to proofread đ„Č
read it on ao3 | masterlist
Chan has been acting strange lately. Not enough that you're worried, just a little bit suspicious. He's never tried to hide what tabs he has open on his phone before and he's looked deep in thought quite a few times, but when you ask what he's thinking of, he changes the topic quickly. You're curious, but trust that Chan will talk to you when he's ready. Still, you can't quite ignore all of the changes in behaviour.
It's the same tonight. When you look up during dinner, Chan's just stirring around the noodles in his plate, only taking a bite every so often. You frown, trying to think of if you've done anything differently to prepare the food in a way that he doesn't like, but it tastes the same to you as usual. You rule out a lack of appetite, as he had just commented that he was starving while you were cooking.
âIs everything okay?â you ask hesitantly, after a few more minutes have passed.
âWhat?â Chan looks up, startled by the sound of your voice. âOh no, everything's fine! Just⊠thinking.â
âIs it about work? Did something happen?â You know that Chan has been busier than usual this month, the boys have some time off in a few weeks and everybody is scrambling to get things finished in the meantime. You've also requested vacation at work, although so far you and Chan haven't planned anything. In fact, he's been a little bit cagey when you've brought up the topic. You try not to think much of it and really, it's just nice to be able to spend extra time together.
Honestly, you wouldn't be surprised if Chan has found out that his break has been cut short or even cancelled. It's rare that theyâre able to have more than a few days off at a time which is why you had been so shocked when Chan had let you know that they didn't have schedules for a period of almost three weeks.
It would provide an explanation to everything that you've observed the past few days, you know that he would try his best to fix things before he had to tell you the bad news.
âWell-â
âIt's okay if you found out you can't take time off,â you reassure him. âI understand that it's all up to the company and sometimes they change their mind at the last minute. I can just let my work know and take my vacation another time, I'm sure they might even be happy if I'm still around next month.â
âNo!â Chan says, his eyes wide in panic. âWe still have time off! Don't worry about that. It's actually- How would you feel about visiting Australia with me?â
It's your turn to stare at Chan in shock.
âAustralia?â
âYeah, it's been a while since I went back and-â Chan breaks eye contact, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. âI thought it'd be nice if I could introduce you to my family, in person.â
âYou want me to meet your family? In Australia?â you repeat, dumbly.
âOnly if you feel comfortable!â Chan says hurriedly. âI looked into tickets, but didn't book anything yet so it's totally up to you. I also wanted to check if my family was available beforehand and it's pretty good timing actually. If you don't want to, then it's totally fine, I'll probably go for either way and I think Felix is also considering it. It's just that we've been together for a while now and I've met your family and I know that my mom basically considers you to be her daughter-â
âI want to go,â you interrupt, not wanting Chan to spiral further. âI was just surprised, I guess, but of course I want to accompany you.â
Chan brightens at that, then grabs his computer, unlocking it and opening up a spreadsheet. As it loads, he reaches for his chopsticks and takes a huge bite of food. You can't help but smile fondly at the sight of his cheeks bulging with food as he chews, relieved that his appetite is back.
âI didnât want to get too far ahead of myself, but I was looking at flights, and I think that if we leave on a Tuesday, it might be best. It means we can enjoy the weekend here and still have time to pack everything,â he explains excitedly. âIt'll be less busy at the airport too, which will be nice, and it works out well with my parentsâ schedules anyway.â
You hum in acknowledgement, content to follow along and take mental notes as Chan reads out everything else that he's thought of so far. He continues planning for the rest of the evening, trailing behind you as you clean up and do your nightly routine, only stopping to help you when you do the dishes and put away the laundry. It's cute how animated he becomes, putting together a long list of all the sites and restaurants that he wants to show you.
You can tell that he's still thinking of it as the two of you curl up in bed that night, every so often you feel him jolt behind you and turn to reach for the little pad of paper and pencil that he often keeps on his nightstand.
Eventually, you turn over and squint at him. He doesn't even pretend to be asleep.
âHi,â he whispers. âSorry if I'm keeping you awake.â
âSleep,â you murmur tiredly. âWe have lots of time to plan, get some rest for now and we can talk more tomorrow.â
Chan starts to protest, but you just nuzzle closer, pulling his hands to wrap around you. As you drift off to sleep, you can feel that Chan has finally relaxed too.
â
The two of you spend the first day of break slowly, sleeping in and having a lazy meal of bibimbap from all the banchan taking up space in your fridge. You only venture out of the apartment for dinner, going to your favourite local restaurant that you visit so often that the owner starts making your meals the second that the two of you step through the door. The next couple of days are also easygoing, consisting of shopping, watching dramas, and eventually preparing for your trip.
Throughout the drive to the airport and making your way through security and to your gate, you can tell Chan's a bit on edge even though you and Felix try to assure him that everything will be fine. The three of you are in incognito mode, wearing hats, face masks, and plain clothes but Chanâs still scanning your surroundings the whole time. You, on the other hand, can't help but be excited, bouncing at his side so much that he loops his arm over your shoulders to try and calm you down. Felix is more relaxed and laughs at the stark contrast between the both of you, even filming parts of it since heâs getting footage for a vlog. Luckily you know that any content with you in it is likely to be edited out and donât bother to hide your eagerness.
While Chan is used to travelling often for concerts and other overseas schedules, you've rarely visited places outside of Korea and have certainly never flown business class. You squeeze Chan's hand when you see your seats, thrilled at the idea of having so much leg room and a divider between the two of you that can also be fully lowered. It keeps you entertained for the whole time before the plane takes off, taking pictures together and reclining your seat up and down until the seatbelt sign turns on.
The flight is over 10 hours, so it doesn't take long before you move your attention to browsing the menu that's available and scrolling through all of the movies on the in-flight entertainment system. Shortly after the dinner meal is served, you start to doze off. Wanting to make the most of the experience, you insist to Chan that you'll be able to stay awake to watch another movie with him, but only make it through the first 30 minutes before you wake up to a dark screen.
You blink up blearily as a flight attendant starts making their way through the aisles, handing out customs forms for everyone to fill out. When you receive yours, you stare at it for a few seconds before realising the problem is not the fact that you're still adjusting to being awake.
âOh no,â you whisper in horror, causing Chan to glance over at you, concerned.
âWhat happened?â he asks.
âI didnât think about practising English before this trip,â you reply, distress leaking into your voice. âThe last time that I wrote anything in English was when I was in secondary school⊠I'm not going to survive in Australia!â
âHey, it's not an issue, I'll be with you the whole time! You don't have to worry about any of that. And you know enough conversational English to get by, I know you do,â Chan says soothingly.
You refuse to be comforted, burying your face into your hands.
âHow am I going to face your parents when I barely know anything other than âhi, how are you?ââ you moan. âI'm not even going to make it through customs! They're going to arrest me when I can't answer any of their questions!â
You know that you're exaggerating, but it makes Chan laugh so hard that tears gather in the corners of his eyes. You try to keep up your act, but end up dissolving into laughter too at the way that Chan is trying so hard to stay quiet, not wanting to bring attention to you two.
Contrary to your fears, you manage to deplane, get through customs, and collect your luggage without any major issues. You had a moment of anxiety when Chan and Felix split up from you since you have to go into the lineup for foreign passports, but you are somehow able to fumble your way through the conversation with the border officer without being detained.
Felix splits up with you shortly after, you see that his tiredness from the long flight melts away the second that he sees his family. He gives you and Chan both a quick hug to say goodbye before running out to meet them.
Chan lights up in a similar way when he finally spots his parents. They're waiting in the pick-up zone and waves the two of you over quickly. You barely get the chance to say hi before Chanâs mother is enveloping you into a hug.
âItâs so nice to finally meet you,â she says warmly. âCome on, letâs take you home.â
The drive is fairly short and it feels like no time at all before youâre approaching the house. The second that the front door opens, you hear a distinctive scrabble of claws against hardwood before Berry shoots towards Chan, tail wagging furiously. Chan immediately kneels down to give her better access, laughing when she stands on her hind legs to lick at his face.
Once sheâs finished with that, she turns to you, barking curiously before moving closer. You stick out a hand for her to get an idea of your scent and try not to jump when you feel the cool, damp press of her nose against your palm. Whatever Berry smells, she approves of, giving you a few quick licks before running back to Chan.
âSheâs so cute!â you exclaim, pulling out your phone so that you can take a picture of the reunion. You don't think that Chan even hears you, caught up in talking to Berry, giving her kisses and allowing her to do the same.
âI'll help you with your bags,â Chan's father says from beside you, easily lifting them out of your hands and motioning for you to enter the house. You exchange greetings with both of Chan's siblings as you remove your shoes, familiar with them through video calls and the one time that you met Hannah when she was travelling in Korea.
Chanâs family recently moved so this was also Chanâs first time seeing the house in person, the two of you trailing behind Chanâs father as he gave you a brief tour of the first floor before leading you upstairs. When you get to the guest room that you'll be staying in, Hannah pops her head in.
âChris doesnât spend enough time in Australia to have his own room in this house, so you guys are in this room.â She eyes you for a moment and based on the mischievous smile thatâs growing, you can guess what sheâs about to say. âY/n, if you get sick of him, then feel free to stay with me instead!â
âHey!â Chan complains, not even looking up from where heâs unpacking his bag. He grabs onto one of his shirts and chucks it at Hannah, but she easily dodges, throwing one of her slippers at him in retaliation. It hits Chan right in the chest and he looks at her in disbelief. He abandons his task in favour of chasing her throughout the house. You don't follow after, but you hear as their yelling and laughter echoes through the halls.
Itâs refreshing to see Chan at home, no matter how comfortable Chan is with the rest of the kids, heâs still the leader of the group and the oldest member and the dynamic of their relationship reflects that. Even though it has barely been a few hours, youâre relieved to find that Chan has left behind the stresses of being an idol and can instead just be a son and an older brother.
His parents are hilarious and kind, itâs easy to see how Chanâs personality is a reflection of the environment that he was raised in. During dinner, you laugh at the way Chan pouts dramatically when Chanâs father pretends to forget about Chan when serving the food and how he groans in pleasure when he finally gets to taste his mother's cooking after so long. Hannah and Lucas continually crack jokes as you eat, especially if they're at Chan's expense and he pretends that he doesn't find them funny.
â
One afternoon you find Chan fiddling with the camera that heâs brought with him. You step up behind him, resting your chin on his shoulder and wrapping your arms around his waist.
âAre you planning on filming tonight?â you ask, knowing that Chan was always careful to alert everyone in the house beforehand.
âNot today,â he replies. âProbably tomorrow, when I take out Berry for her morning walk. Did you want to join?â
âOf course!â
âI was thinking of going right after breakfast, before it gets too hot out,â he says as he pulls out the camera battery and fits it into the charger.
âAnywhere in particular you wanted to go?â
âMmm, maybe by the water? There's a path that's not too far away. I don't want anything that's too close to the house, you know?â
âGood idea.â
âAre you planning on putting it into a vlog?â you ask curiously. "You haven't been filming much.â
"ActuallyâŠâ
âWhat? You're making me nervous.â
âI was hoping to use it for a music video,â Chan says sheepishly.
âWhat?! I'm not qualified for that!! I can't- you need to find someone else-â
âNo no, it's going to be fine! It's for a record, not like, an actual music video.â
âI don't know,â you say, still feeling hesitant.
âI promise, I'm going for the casual vibes and it's either you or like, my eomma, and I guarantee that you would do a better job.â
âOkay,â you say reluctantly. âBut I can't guarantee it'll come out well.â
âThank you! I know it'll be great,â Chan says, showering you with kisses in gratitude until you're squirming away.
â
The next morning, Chanâs parents are out, leaving all the kids to prepare food on their own. It's a little chaotic, but you manage to cobble together a decent meal. It's a lot of fun to see how Chan and his siblings interact without their parents around to mediate. You're amazed by how similar the three are, not only in appearance but also the way they behave.
Although much younger, Lucas shares a strong resemblance to Chan, especially once he smiles and shows off matching dimples. They quickly disappear once Chan reaches out and musses up his hair playfully as youâre all cleaning up.
âChris, stop it,â he complains, pushing his older brother away before trying to fix the strands that are all over the place. It only encourages Chan to move closer, wrapping his arms around his brother and lifting him into the air. When trying to wiggle free doesnât work, he turns pleading eyes to you, knowing Hannah wouldn't step in to help. âNoona! Get him to let me down!â
The two of you had been awkward the first time you had been left alone, it hadnât helped that Lucasâ Korean could be considered conversational at best and your English was significantly worse, but you had quickly grown close through attempts to tease Chan. Now, itâs easy to treat him like the little brother you never had.
You approach quickly, trying to avoid Lucasâ flailing limbs, and reach out to poke at Chanâs waist. He twitches away from your touch and when you persist in prodding at all his ticklish spots, unwinds one of his arms to swat at your hand.
The distraction is enough for Lucas to break away and he quickly moves out of reach. Instead of chasing after him, Chan turns his focus to you. You back away nervously, but find yourself with nowhere to go. Chan grabs you and easily slings you over your shoulder, ignoring your shrieks of protest.
âBetrayed by my own girlfriend? I should have known that introducing you to my siblings would just be asking for trouble,â he growls in your ear, sending shivers down your spine.
âHey! Where are you taking me?â You look to see if his siblings are going to rescue you, but they must be trying to avoid Chan's wrath as you don't see either of them as Chan brings you up to the guest room.
âI am enlisting your help,â he says casually, as if he wasn't carrying you up a flight of stairs and dropping you on the bed. âI would like your advice on what to wear for Berry's walk.â
âOoh,â you say. âVery important business then, I'm honoured that you would ask me.â
It doesn't actually take much time to get ready, the two of you change into clothes for the heat and you just have to convince Chan that he doesn't have to try to do his hair or makeup. The second that you mention to Berry that you're going for a walk, her tail starts wagging non-stop and she even fetches her leash and drops it in front of you.
Chan doesn't give you much direction for filming, just hands you the camera and tells you to capture whatever you want. The two of you walk hand in hand through the neighbourhood, Berry happily exploring the area. As you get further away from the house, you let go of Chan, motioning for him to continue walking as you turn on the camera and get used to it.
By the time you've reached the waterfront, you're feeling more confident and have a better idea of what you like. You try out different angles, feeling a little bit like paparazzi, and after a few minutes, even try directing Chan too. You let him keep going, wanting to see how far away he'll go before he realises that you're not following. He's almost a block away before he turns back.
âYouâre smiling, did it come out okay?â Chan asks as he jogs back towards you.
âYeah, it was great! I was just thinking that Stay are going to go crazy over this,â you tell him.
âThey do really like it whenever they get to see Berry,â he says thoughtfully, picking her up and scratching her head. You burst out laughing at that and Chan frowns in response and goes as far as to cover Berryâs ears, insulted on her behalf. âWhat? Donât laugh at that, itâs true! Berry is just so cute.â
âIâm not saying that they donât like Berry, of course they do. I was more referring to the fact that the video is⊠domestic. Very boyfriend.â
âOoh you think that's what Stay are interested in?â he asks. âWhat about this?â
He gestures for you to lift up the camera, and once you're recording, grabs your hand to pull you along behind him. You let out a small noise of surprise as he tugs on your arm, struggling slightly to keep everything steady and ensure your hand is out of frame. At your sound, Chan looks back slightly and bursts into laughter.
âSo concentrated, youâre so cute,â he giggles.
âOf course,â you grumble. âI want it to turn out nice.â
âThank you,â Chan says sincerely, no traces of laughter in his voice. âI really do appreciate it a lot that you're helping me with work even though we're on vacation.â
âHmm,â you say, turning away from him. âYou're just glad that you didn't have to ask Hannah, because she would make fun of you the whole time.â
âThat's not true! I mean, it is true that Hannah would do that, but that's not the only reason.â Chan uses your connected hands and pulls you close. âI also wanted to spend time with my favourite person in the whole world.â
âYou're lucky I love you so much,â you sniff, still pretending to be annoyed even though you've practically melted into Chan's hug. âNow stop getting distracted, I thought it would look nice if you walked along the sand and there's nobody there right now.â
â
The rest of your time in Sydney is a whirlwind of activities. Chan is determined to take you to all his favourite places in the city and you eat more food than you thought possible. Chanâs family, and sometimes Felix and his family, accompanies you two for a majority of the outings and your initial hesitance interacting with them is replaced by fondness, eased by the way that they treat you like one of their own.
You even have a chance to meet some of Chanâs childhood friends, ones that he kept close with despite the long distance. It feels strange to eat dinner with them. Although they do their best to make you feel welcome, they have a lot of history together and you find yourself struggling to keep up with their conversation, not just because of the language barrier but due to references to people, places, and events that you're unfamiliar with. Regardless, you're glad to finally know the people that Chan grew up with and you love seeing how happy Chan is to be reunited with them.
Itâs also nice that while you're meeting so many people, you don't have to hide your relationship at all. In Korea, you and Chan are more careful in public. Itâs not totally a secret that youâre dating, but you are more on the cautious side due to the popularity of Stray Kids and inevitable scrutiny from fans. In Australia, Chan has no such reservations, excitedly introducing you as his girlfriend to everyone. It never fails to make you blush, feeling shy, but secretly pleased.
Wherever you go, Chan keeps you close to his side, linking your hands or looping an arm around your shoulders. Throughout the day, he presses kisses to your head or cheek. The first time he does it, you look up at him questioningly. He just shrugs, saying that heâs happy and well, you canât argue with that.
You donât want your vacation to end and you know you're not the only one. You and Chan have both procrastinated packing your luggage until the last possible moment, and when you finally do begin, Berry seems to sense it. She starts hiding all of your things- Chan's family members finding them lodged in one of the couch cushions or in her dog bed- and curling up inside your suitcase, making it practically impossible to continue packing.
When Chan enters your shared room and pauses when he sees you staring into the suitcase helplessly. You wave him over so that he can look inside.
âSheâs too cute! Look at that little face, how could you disturb her?â you ask.
Chan has no such reservations. He reaches in and gently lifts Berry out, cradling her against his chest so that she canât jump back in.
âBerry, do you want to come to Korea with us?â he asks patiently. When she licks at his face in reply, he groans and pretends to lower her back into the suitcase. âAh, I guess we have no choice but to bring you! I think we can sneak you in with the rest of the souvenirs that weâre taking with us.â
Despite Chanâs promises, Berry ends up staying behind, not even joining you on the drive to the airport. Youâre lucky that you decide to leave well before your flight is expected to depart as you end up taking almost half an hour saying goodbye to everybody.
You know that youâre going to treasure these memories for a long time and youâre certain that Chan will too. Itâs amazing that even though you were only in Australia for a couple weeks, it already feels like a second home.
read it on ao3 | masterlist
#hoju (home)#chahnniesroom#skz fanfic#skz fluff#skz fic#skz x reader#stray kids fluff#stray kids fanfic#stray kids x reader#stray kids x y/n#stray kids x you#stray kids x female reader#bang chan x y/n#bang chan x you#bang chan x reader#bang chan fluff#chan x y/n#chan x reader#chan x you#chan fluff#skz imagines#stray kids#chan#bang chan#requests
600 notes
·
View notes
Text
Part 8: The Toxic In Intoxication
Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11
Your mouth is poison (your mouth is wine)
(In which an all over the place writer, writes something that's a little bit all over the place)
Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd
Themes: Angst, Fluff, Jealousy,
Words: 9.0K
TW: Swearing, a little bit of violence, mentions of blood, men being men
A/N: Hi lovelies :) Unfortunately, as I've been warning y'all for a while, the deadline did finally slip through my fingers. However I'm hoping y'all will forgive me for it because I am only one day late and this chapter is quite long. I do wanna warn y'all in advance that there won't be a chapter next week because I am going on vacation and my laptop is staying very, very far away from me. There's a lot going on in this chapter and I'm not sure how I feel about the whole thing but I'm hoping y'all will enjoy it anyways. I did actually edit this time but who knows how successful that was, so please let me know about typos/mistakes. As always, feel free to tell me about what you liked, what you disliked and anything you'd like to see going forward. Have a lovely rest of your weeks my loves <3
August 2025
Azzi Fudd is a spectacular liar. She excels at keeping up a façade of yes everything is perfectly fine in front of her friends and family. Sheâs quite good at tricking people she can barely stand into thinking oh yes iâm totally enjoying this conversation. But the person Azzi lies the most to, is without a doubt herself. As she steps out of the car into the hot Indiana air, bustling with noises from the growing crowd inside, Azzi internally repeats a lie to herself again: she did not show up to all-star weekend for a glimpse of her ex girlfriend. Sheâs here, as per Colleenâs managerial advice, to build connections, to further her career and to expand on opportunities in the basketball world. The fact that Paige Bueckers, who Azzi hasnât seen in three months -the longest period of time theyâd spent apart since sheâd started at UConn- is definitely also going to be attending tonightâs party, is merely a happenstance.Â
Taking a deep breath, Azzi puts one kitten heeled foot in front of the other, trying to ignore her heightened nerves. This isnât her preferred scene by any means. Sheâd much rather be back in her hotel room, curled on her couch with a book and a pint of ice cream. Itâs not that Azzi doesnât like parties; she has her fair share of fun at Tedâs, but itâs the unfamiliarity of the environment and the lack of that once ever present comforting hand that used to tap out iâm here for you against the back of her own at big events like these, that has her yearning to crawl back into the car and hide away.Â
âAzzi?â a familiar voice calls from behind her and Azzi lets out a sigh of relief as she sees Aaliyah walking towards her with a large welcoming grin, âAzeray!â
âLi-Li. Thank god youâre here,â Azzi reaches up to hug her former teammate, mentally thanking whatever god was looking out for her. Sheâd dreaded walking in by herself and now she wouldnât have to. Really she probably should probably send Coach a âthank youâ text for having so many alumni in the league that there was bound to be a Husky she could attach herself to for the night.Â
âIâm glad to see you too Az,â Aaliyah says, pulling away and looking at Azzi with a semi-concerned look, âbut you seem a little extra relieved to see me? You good dude?â
âJust- just a little nervous,â Azzi admits, shuffling her feet uneasily.Â
Realization dawns on Aaliyahâs face, âcause of Paige?â
âNo you know I donât like big unfamiliar places,â Azzi sighs when Aaliayh gives her a pointed look, âbut I guess maybe- maybe a little cause of Paige.â
The Mystics forward shakes her head before linking her arms through Azziâs, âI swear, I leave yâall for one year and everything implodes-," she bites her tongue, "shit was that insensitive?â
âNo,â Azzi grimaces, âthatâs pretty much exactly what happened.â
Something hard coils in her stomach at Aaliyahâs words. The truth is theyâd been fine. Better than fine even. And then suddenly Azzi was lighting a box of matches she hadnât even known she was holding and her whole world was on fire; an implosion of everything Azzi had once thought inflammable. Sheâd burned her hands trying to rescue them and all she has to show for it are invisible red hot pustules that refuse to heal. But perhaps, she thinks, thatâs what a pyromaniac like her had deserved.Â
Azzi cowers under the flashing lights of the cameras, clinging tighter to Aaliyahâs arm as the two of them make their way onto the orange carpet, the cameramen immediately swinging their devices to capture the college basketball player more than likely to be the number one pick in next yearâs WNBA draft. She feels herself tense under their piercing gaze, anchored only by Aaliyah's strong and steady presence next to her. And as they pose for the cameras, sheâs thankful for her former teammateâs company but she canât shake the feeling that it should have been someone else.Â
âAnd look who we have here,â Lexie Brown says excitedly as the two of them approach the interviewer, âyâall Huskies clean up nice.â
âWe try, we try,â Aaliyah answers charismatically, doing a little hair flip to match her tone.Â
âAaliyah, it's your first all-star nod, how are you feeling?âÂ
âI feel great, you know itâs always good to see yourself being acknowledged and being an all-star has always been a goal of mine. So, I hope itâs the first of many and Iâm just hoping my team gets the W tomorrow,â Aaliyah answers diplomatically.
Lexie turns to Azzi, âI bet youâre really proud of her. I mean youâve got a couple of teammates who are first-time all stars between Aaliyah and Paige. Youâve gotta be feeling pretty proud of themâ
âY-yeah I mean,â Azzi clears her throat, trying not to flinch at the mention of Paigeâs name, âItâs been- itâs been really exciting to watch them and Iâm extremely proud-â
Sheâs cut off by the sound of excited chatter filling up the air and Azzi doesnât have to turn around to know whoâs just entered the premises. Not when she has a whole separate sensory system that flares up just for her. Azziâs skin prickles as she registers the sound of familiar peals of laughter echoing from the orange carpet. She digs her nails into the palm of her hand, forcing herself not to turn around.Â
âSpeak of the devil,â Lexie says goodnaturedly, getting her hand ready to beckon the blonde over and Azzi feels panic suffocate her lungs, not quite ready to face Paige yet.Â
âOh I donât think-â Aaliyah tries to cut in, glancing worriedly at her friend but itâs too late.Â
âPaige,â Lexie calls out, beaming over Azziâs head at the Dallas Wingsâ newest star point guard.Â
The world seems to move in slow motion as Azzi feels Paige getting closer and closer to her. She smells the faint scent of fresh mint weaved with a hint of citrus first. Then she hears the sound of Paigeâs breathing, perfectly even to anybody else but Azzi can hear the staggered harshness hidden beneath it. And as the blonde passes over her to settle on Lexiâs other side, she feels Paigeâs arm brush against her own and it hurts to breathe. The contact lasts for a second but Azzi swears itâll last forever, tattooing itself on her bicep as a wretched reminder of a touch sheâs no longer allowed to crave.Â
Itâs funny, thereâs a hurricane swirling between them and Paige can barely look at Azzi, keeping her eyes firmly on Lexie and Aaliyah as she greets the trio. And yet, thereâs a sense of calm -of peace- that seems to wash over Azzi just by having Paige near her again. The older woman seems to possess some sort of magical power that weaves itself into Azziâs nervous system, soothing away her frazzled nerves with an unspoken promise of and if you give me the chance iâll make it all okay.Â
Despite the hectic transition from a full college season to a frantic W season, Paige looks ethereal as always. Her two piece cropped vest top and straight fitted pants match the color of her eyes and a silver chain dangles across her chest. Two strands of blonde hair hide her signature diamond studs, the rest of it pulled back into a slightly messy bun. Azzi gulps at the way the vest top parts right above her midriff, Paigeâs toned abs playing peek-a-boo behind it. She lets her eyes roam over Paigeâs exposed arms, trying to ignore memories of how they used to go taut under her touch, down to the blondeâs bare fingers and she feels her heart constrict. No rings. It feels wrong. But then again, nothing has felt right for three months.Â
âAzzi,â Aaliyah hisses and Azzi snaps out of her thoughts, realizing sheâd been asked a question.Â
âSorry,â she laughs nervously, moving a strand of her hair out of her face; Paigeâs eyes intently following the movement, âwhat was the question.â
Lexie smiles, âI was just asking about your thoughts on Paigeâs amazing rookie year so far?â
âOh um-â Azzi hesitates, shivers inching up her spine as she feels Paige drinking in the sight of the her body like she's a woman parched, âIâm just-â their eyes lock with each otherâs and everything else seems to vanish until it feels like itâs just the two of them floating in between remnants of what they used to be, âIâm just really proud of her. I always knew sheâd be amazing. Sheâs just doing what she always does. Being the best player she can be. So yeah Iâm just- Iâm just really proud of her.â
And Azzi doesnât know how they got to this point where Paige seems almost shocked that Azzi could be proud of her, to this point where thereâs droplets threatening to spill over both of their water lines and they no longer have the right to wipe each otherâs tears away.Â
âAww,â Lexie coos, oblivious to the tension, âwell on that sweet note, off yâall go and weâll see yâall later.â
The walk into the party is kept alive with Aaliyahâs attempt at keeping a conversation going. While Paige tries to at least entertain some of, Azzi finds herself completely zoning out until they finally make their way inside into the cacophony of music and laughter.Â
âYâall wanna get-â Aaliyah begins.
âI see Jewell and TĂ©a,â Paige cuts her off immediately, her legs already moving in a rush, âIâll see yâall later.â
She gives Aaliyah a tentative grin but barely looks at Azzi as she practically trips over her pant-sleeves trying to get away. It feels like somethingâs biting against her skin, sharp teeth indenting you did this to yourself as Azzi watches Paige walk away. She watches as the tension slowly leaves the blondeâs muscles as sheâs pulled into a hug by Jewell and then by TĂ©a. The fake smile that sheâd politely kept on her face the last couple of minutes for the sake of the cameras and reporters is replaced by something far more genuine. Azzi watches as Paige is absorbed into the warmth of the growing crowd, embraced by a league that adores her, and she feels the ice cold pinch of she belongs somewhere without you now start to freeze her own heart.Â
***
Azziâs doing fine. Sheâs gotten through the night with Aaliyah by her side, making small talk with a bunch of different players and sheâs managed to keep a friendly smile the whole time. Sheâd even danced for a little bit, letting loose with some of the other college basketball players that had made the trip to Indianapolis. Sure, sheâd occasionally been distracted by her eyes flickering over to the bar and finding a new pretty influencer batting their fake eyelashes at Paige but really sheâs doing fine. Her headâs a little dizzy and maybe the third shot of tequila, influenced by a one leggy brunette that had gotten a little too handsy, wasnât her brightest decision of the night but really, Azziâs doing fine.Â
Until sheâs not.Â
And itâs Paige's fault. She had to know that it would be Azziâs last straw. She had to know that Azzi could live with watching a thousand girls flirt with Paige as long as the blonde in question stood rigidly by the bar doing nothing but smiling politely at them. She had to know that Azzi, after having spent most of their college life watching girls fawn over her girlfriend, could deal with the flirty hands that lingered just a little too long on Paigeâs bicep. But itâs when Paige leans into this one girl -whose dark curls and tanned caramel skin are just a little too reminiscent of her own- when Paigeâs lips graze just a little to close this one girlâs ear, that Azzi realizes sheâs decidedly not fine.Â
âI need some air,â she manages to bite out, ignoring Aaliyahâs concerned look as she marches out the back door, heading towards the deck.Â
Azzi buries her face in her hands as she leans back against the brick wall. She knows sheâs being unfair; knows she has absolutely no right to feel this way but something burns within her anyways and the light breeze does nothing to cool it down.Â
âIâm not cheating on you,â a harsh voice interrupts her pity party and Azzi sucks in a sharp breath, âWeâre not together and I can flirt or kiss or fuck-â she flinches, âanyone if I want to.â
âI know.â
âDo you?â Paigeâs voice is laced with accusation, âbecause the way you just stormed out says otherwise.â
Azzi continues to keep her head in her palms, refusing to look at the blonde, âitâs hot and stuffy in there. I just needed some fresh air.â
âDonât you ever get tired of lying,â Paige spits out.Â
âWell what do you want me to say instead?â Azzi finally looks up, her even cadence in stark contrast to Paigeâs fiery tone, âI know weâre not together-â
âBecause thatâs what you wanted-â
âI know,â Azzi yells, and then quieter, âI know. I know I- I know I did this. But that- that doesnât make it any easier to see you with someone else,â she swallows, âdoesnât mean it doesnât hurt. Doesnât mean I donât miss you.â
Paige scoffs, rubbing her face as she begins to pace, âyou miss me? I was at Mohegan when yâall had summer camp. The whole team showed up to the game except for you and you want me to believe that you miss me?â
âI didnât think youâd want me there,â Azzi confesses in a whisper, âyou were so mad at me after-after everything- and I just- I didnât want to ruin coming back to Connecticut for you.â
âFor me,â Paige lets out a laugh devoid of any emotion, âgod Azzi there you go again with this fake âselflessâ bullshit.â
A thousand and one retorts die on the tip of Azziâs tongue as she shakes her head and pushes herself off the wall. She can smell the alcohol on Paige, can tell the blonde is itching for an argument but all she feels is pure exhaustion.Â
 âI donât wanna fight Paige. Iâm tired and I just-â she bites her lip, fighting the urge to caress Paigeâs cheek, âbelieve it or donât but- I really do miss you.â
Sparks of electricity dance their way through Azziâs veins when Paige curls a hand around her wrist, stopping her in her tracks from going inside. And suddenly she doesnât feel so cold anymore.Â
âDance with me,â Paige whispers.Â
âWhat?âÂ
Paige shrugs, tugging on Azziâs hand to pull her closer, âyou said you donât wanna fight and I- I donât want you to go,â the confession hangs between them as Paigeâs hands fall to Azziâs waist, âso- letâs just- letâs pretend.â
âWhat are we pretending?â Azzi asks quietly and despite the warnings ringing in her head, she wraps her arms around Paigeâs neck. It feels like coming home.Â
âWeâre pretending that weâre okay,â Paige says softly, holding Azziâs hips as she begins to sway them gently, âweâre pretending that three months ago you said yes.â
âPaige-â
âClose your eyes Azzi,â the blond waves her hand gently across Azziâs face, willing both of their eyelids to flutter shut, âweâre pretending that weâre not here- weâre in Minnesota or DC or I donât know just- anywhere. And our families are here, laughing and talking and some sappy romantic song is playing. It's the best day of our lives and weâre both- we're both dressed in white-â
âPaige,â Azzi lets out a sob, as she begins to understand the picture Paige is painting for them; a picture drawn on a canvas that Azzi had torn up before any color could touch it
âSshhhh just- let me have this okay,â Paigeâs voice trembles as she leans her forehead against Azziâs, âif I canât have it for real, please just let me pretend.â
If they were both just a little bit more sober, maybe Azzi would fight Paigeâs tightening grip. If they were both just a little bit more sober, maybe Paige would let go. Instead Azzi lets Paige play pretend, lets them keep their bodies pressed against each other, moving from side to side in rhythm with the wind.Â
It isnât until she hears footsteps approaching them that Azzi hurriedly moves away first and she can see the betrayal of if only youâd just let me hold you in front of the world written all over Paigeâs face. Theyâre both quick to swap their tears for smiles that donât reach their eyes as they turn to face the intruders. And Azzi wonders if Paige wishes sheâd drank a little bit more too. Because maybe if they were both just a little more drunk, then tomorrow they wouldnât have to remember just how right it had felt to play pretend tonight.Â
April 2033Â
âYou look so pretty Mama,â Stephie gushes from where sheâs perched on the bed as she watches Azzi put the finishing touches to her makeup
âThanks baby,â Azzi smiles, blowing a kiss in the mirror.Â
âMiss Buecks,â Stephie flips the running facetime call, skipping over to her mother with the phone in her hand, âdoesnât Mama look beautiful?â
Sixteen years later, and maybe itâs because of all the time theyâd missed in between, but Azzi canât help the bout of shyness that flushes across her features when Stephie places the phone, Paigeâs face illuminated all over it, against the mirror so the blonde can get a proper look at Azziâs outfit.
âYou look-â Paige clears her throat, eyes dilated as they rake over Azziâs whole body, âyou look phenomenal.â
âBig word Bueckers,â Azzi teases, trying to disguise her blush, âdid you just learn it?â
Paige rolls her eyes, âcanât even give you a compliment without an insult Fudd.â
âYou guys argue too much,â Stephie says exasperatedly, shaking her head at the two adults who laugh. The younger girl sometimes seems far wise beyond her age.Â
âWeâre not arguing Stephie, weâre just-â Azzi struggles to think of a word.Â
âForeplaying,â Paige mutters under her breath and Azzi immediately glares at her.Â
âPaige!â
Stephie scrunches up her nose at the screen, âwhat does that mean?â
âNothing,â Azzi says shrilly, âMiss Buecks is just making up words.â
âWhy would Miss Buecks do that?â Stephie asks, looking back and forth between her mother and the screen.Â
âWhy does Miss Buecks do anything,â Azzi babbles, as she begins to usher Stephie out of her room, âgo grab your things Stephie-bean. Mamaâs almost ready to drop you off at Nana and Popâs house.â
Stephie pouts, âI wanna go to the party with you and Miss Buecks. Itâs no fair you both get to go and I donât,â she picks up the phone, looking at Paige with wide guilt-tripping eyes, âdonât you love me Miss Buecks?â
Azzi has to hand it to her daughter. Sheâs a smart one to choose Paige as the victim of her emotional blackmail, knowing her wiles had long stopped working on her mother.Â
âYou know Iâd take you with me if I could Stephie,â Paige says, âbut Iâll make it up to you tomorrow I swear.â
Stephie smiles and Azzi shakes her head at how quickly the five-year oldâs plan had worked, âyouâll take me to the park and then weâll get fries and then get ice cream?â
âThatâs a lot of junk food Steph-â
âSsshh Mama,â Stephie chides, âthis is between me and Miss Buecks.â
âThe park, then fries, then ice cream it is,â Paige concedes and Azzi rolls her eyes.Â
Stephie grins brightly, puckering her lips to kiss Paige through the phone and eliciting a laugh from the older woman when she cheers, âyouâre the best-est-est Miss Buecks. See you in a little bit. Donât hang up without saying goodnight.â
âI promise I wonât,â Paige calls out after the little girl as Stepehie hands the phone back to Azzi and starts skipping towards her room.Â
Azzi gives the blonde a look, âwe have got to have a conversation about you learning to say no to her.â
Paige shrugs unhelpfully, âI donât want to learn how to say no to her.â
âYouâre a lost cause,â Azzi remarks, hands on hips, âand foreplay? Seriously? Us bickering is not foreplay.â
âWell it could be if youâd just let me fuck you after,â Paige grumbles and Azziâs mouth falls open at the bluntness of it.Â
âYou say the most romantic things to me Paige Bueckers.â
Theyâre both quiet for a second as Azzi moves around her room, collecting her wallet and keys and to put into her purse.Â
âYou know thereâs still time for me to come pick you up,â Paige says finally.
âPaige,â Azzi sighs, not wanting a rerun of the same argument theyâve been having for the last week. She knows itâs a touchy subject for Paige; that it veers a little too close to insecurities that stem from their past but sheâs not quite ready to take this step yet. There isnât quite any rhyme or reason to her logic except well, sheâs haunted by memories of the last time theyâd let the personal mix with the professional. Her phone still holds invitations to countless team reunions that sheâd actively avoided and a group chat that sheâs long muted. Azzi hasnât stepped foot in the state of Connecticut since sheâd entered the draft; she refuses to lose California too.Â
âTeammates can carpool,â Paige explains vehemently, âitâs easily explainable.â
âI know-â
âIs this about ClĂ©mence?â bitterness tinges the edge of Paigeâs voice as she chews her bottom lip. And there it is, the other subject theyâd been tip-toeing around since it had been brought up at breakfast a week ago. Paige and Azzi are both excellent at avoiding talking about the harder topics but theyâve never quite managed to let anything go forever.Â
âWhy would this be about ClĂ©mence?âÂ
Paige narrows her eyes, sitting up from where sheâd previously been lounging against her pillow, âmaybe you donât want her to see us together? Maybe youâre trying to spare her feelings I donât know.â
âPaige-â
âYou know what itâs fine,â Paige huffs, âIâll see you at the bar Azzi.â
She hangs up before Azzi can say anything and the brunette lets out a litany of curses under her breath, annoyed with Paigeâs ability to go from A to Z by skipping everything in between. Thereâs a part of her that knows Paige deserves an explanation about ClĂ©mence, a chance to have her lingering doubts confirmed or denied, but amidst the egoistic thoughts of well she married someone else and the self preservationist urge to prevent a potential fight, she hadnât been brave enough to approach the topic just quite yet. Azziâs about to step out of the room, when her phone pings with a facetime call from Paige again.Â
âAre you calling to apologize for hanging up?â Azzi asks with a frown.Â
âNo,â Paige replies stubbornly, âI called because I hung up without saying goodnight to Stephie and just because Iâm mad at you doesnât mean Iâm gonna miss saying goodnight to her.â
Something wonderful and warm blooms in Azziâs chest as she silently walks over to Stephieâs room. This is a new chapter in Paigeâs storybook that sheâs slowly beginning to read; one scribbled with the blondeâs devotion to Azziâs baby girl. Azzi still has every other chapter memorized; had thought nothing could be more beautiful than the words within the one that had been dedicated to her. But sheâd been wrong. Because every day that she watches Paige and Stephie fall more and more in love with each other, she finds herself falling in love with how much they love each other.Â
âMiss Buecks,â Stephie squeals, practically snatching the phone from her motherâs hand as she goofily grins at the screen, âyou didnât hang up.â
âI promised I wouldnât,â Paige says, the hardness that had existed in her voice while talking to Azzi, dissolving into adulation, âyou be good for Nana and Pops okay?â
âIâm always good,â Stephie says matter-of-factly, âcan you come over really, really, early tomorrow?â
Paige laughs, âIâll be there as soon as I wake up.â
âGood,â Stephie claps contentedly as she grabs Azziâs hand to start walking towards the car, âgood night Miss Buecks.â
âGood night Stephie-bean,â Paige echoes, blowing a kiss through the screen.Â
âPaige,â Azzi says urgently, trying to stop the older woman from hanging up, âcan you just hold on a second while I buckle Stephie in.â
âAz-â
âPlease.â
âFine,â Paige says, averting Azziâs gaze as she sulks.Â
Azzi lifts Stephie onto the car seat, fastening her seatbelt and pressing a kiss to her daughterâs cheek, before she closes the car door and uses it as a stabilizing structure to lean on as she pulls her phone back in front of her.Â
âHey,â she whispers.Â
âHi,â Paige says back begrudgingly, âyou wanted to say something?â
âI-â Azzi swallows, âdonât go the bar-â
âOh fantastic,â Paige cuts her off, her voice furious as she glares daggers at Azzi through the phone, ânot only do you not want to go to the bar together, you donât want me to go at all. Fine. Okay. Whatever. I wonât go. You have the time of your life with fucking Clementine or whatever-â
âYet,â Azzi says loudly, trying to speak over Paigeâs angry rant, âdonât go to the bar yet.â
âWhat?âÂ
Azzi licks her lips, âdonât go yet. Iâm gonna drop Stephie off at my parents-â
âWhat does that have to-â
âWill you just let me fucking finish?â Azzi almost bangs her fist on the car in frustration and sheâs glad to see that it makes Paige look just a little bit sheepish, âas I was saying. Iâm gonna drop Stephie off at my parents and uh- your house- itâs um- itâs on the way to the bar so I thought,â she shrugs with fake nonchalance, the edge of her mouth turning upwards, âI thought maybe- maybe I could pick you up on the way.â
Paige stares blankly at the screen, eyes blinking as Azziâs words slowly register, âyou- you wanna go to the bar together?â
âI didnât say that,â Azzi teases, eyes twinkling as she basks in the thrill of eliciting that Azzi smile from Paigeâs lips, âteammates carpool right?â
âTeammates definitely carpool.â
April 2029Â
âYou invited ClĂ©mence to our movie night?â Jana asks in a whisper, as she walks into the kitchen where Azziâs making popcorn. Her Saturday nights have gotten rather boring since sheâs had Stephie, consisting of alternating between movie nights with Jana and dinner with her parents. It wasnât the most thrilling of times but she looked forward to them all week, excited to not have to spend a night in solitude.
âShe asked what I was doing tonight and I told her we were having a movie night and then she asked if she could join and well I couldnât just say no,â Azzi explains, sticking the bag into the microwave.Â
Jana cocks an eyebrow, âdo you want me to leave?â
âWhy would I want you to leave?â Azzi asks, crinkling her nose as she juts out an ear just in case the baby monitor goes off.Â
âCâmon Az,â Jana says pointedly, leaning on her elbows against the kitchen counter, âyouâre telling me thereâs nothing going on between the two of you?â
Azzi grimaces uneasily, not quite wanting to answer the question, ânothing that would require you to leave.â
âIf thatâs the way you want to play it,â Jana relents, grabbing a soda from the fridge on her way back to the living room, before she pauses in the doorway to look back at Azzi, âbut I know what it looks like when somebodyâs in love with you. And that girl out there,â she nods her head towards where ClĂ©mence is daintily sitting on the couch, âsheâs definitely getting there.â
Janaâs a rather observant person but Azzi knows that sheâs at least a little bit wrong this time. Because ClĂ©mence might be a little bit in love with -even if thatâs not a fact Azzi particularly wants to acknowledge- but it's impossible for her to look at Azzi the way Jana remembers someone else looking at her. That had been something completely different; a gaze that saw all the little chinks in her armor, all the imperfections carved against her walls and loved her inspite of them, maybe even because of them. ClĂ©mence might love her, but Azzi doesnât think anyone can be in love with her the way the person sheâd been hopelessly in love with, had.Â
When she walks back into the living room with the popcorn in hand, still plagued by her younger teammateâs words, Azziâs deliberate to sit on the couch next to Jana instead of the open space next to the francophone. The flash of hurt in ClĂ©menceâs eye causes guilt to trickle down her spine but Azzi thinks a flash is better than the tsunami of pain she could cause if she doesnât start to ease herself out of this right now. Thereâs a selfish part of her that doesnât want to, thatâs going to miss having somebody who hangs onto her every word. Azzi likes this feeling of being wanted, even if itâs not by the person she wants. But that person isnât hers to want anymore and she wonât torture ClĂ©mence by barricading her in the same jail that has held Azziâs soul captive for the last four years.Â
Theyâre about half way through the movie, awkward tension eased by Janaâs incessant chatter, when Azziâs phone buzzes. Already confused at the timing of the call, sheâs even more perplexed to see Iceâs name flashing on the screen.Â
âOooh Iceyyy,â Janaâs eyes light up when she catches a glimpse of the CallerID, âput her on speaker. Ice is one of our UConn teammates,â she explains, turning to ClĂ©mence who nods in recognition, âshe probably did something dumb as fuck and need Azziâs advice.â
âDonât be mean,â Azzi scolds with a grin, knowing that Janaâs probably right as she picks up the call, âhello-â
âI hate you,â Azzi freezes at the sound of the familiar voice, laced with unfamiliar malice. Next to her Jana stiffens immediately while ClĂ©mence observes the scene in front of her with a guarded frown.Â
âPaige who the fuck are you calling?â Iceâs voice is muffled in the background, âoh shit, Paige give me back my phone.â
âNo. She needs to hear this,â Paige grits out, her pitch wavering with the effects of alcohol, âshe needs to hear how much I fucking hate her. Azzi do you hear me? I can hear you breathing. I know youâre there. Did you hear what I said?â
âPaige,â Ice hisses again.Â
Azzi swallows the lump in her throat, fingers digging into her bare thighs as she grips her phone so hard, she half-expects it to break into pieces in a reflection of her heart, âI heard you Paige.â
âGood. Because I do. I really fucking hate you,â Paige repeats again and Azzi flinches, âyou ruined me Azzi. And now youâre ruining my marriage. My wife is perfect. She loves me. She loves being seen with me. She loves being known as my wife. Everything I ever wanted from you, sheâs willing to give me. But she saw that damn hug at the Olympics and she- sheâs upset with me. She thinks- she thinks Iâm not over you.â
âAz maybe you should-â Jana says softly but Azzi immediately raises a hand to stop her. Maybe sheâs a masochist but she can hear the hurt laced underneath the anger in Paige's voice. And if what Paige needs to get rid of her pain is a target to aim all her arrows at, then Azziâs willing to sacrifice her heart, or at least what little is still left of it.Â
âAnd the worst thing about it,â Paigeâs voice breaks, âis that she's probably right. I have the perfect fucking woman at home and I canât seem to get over the one who broke my heart and never looked back. Isnât that pathetic?â
âPaige,â Ice pleads again and Azzi can hear her former teammate trying her best to wrangle the phone out of Paigeâs firm grasp.Â
âIâm not done yet Ice. I need to talk to her and I need to talk to her now because if I donât, Iâll never get the courage to say any of this again,â Paige is sobbing now, and her broken whimpers pierce Azziâs heart deeper than any words could, âwhy couldnât you just have said yes Az? I know- I know your reasons but why- why couldnât you have just loved me enough to look past them? How do you do it Azzi? How do you live without me because itâs been four years and I- I still donât think I know how to live without you and I hate you, I hate you because you do.â
No, Azzi thinks, I really donât. But she doesnât say anything, rapidly blinking back tears as she avoids both Janaâs concerned look and ClĂ©menceâs more thoughtful gaze.Â
âI wish I could just feel nothing towards you Azzi,â Paige confesses, heaving as she struggles to breathe through her tears, âI donât want to hate you. I donât want to miss you and I really- I really, really donât want to love you. Please just make it stop. Iâm so tired of this Azzi. Iâm so tired of hurting. How do I make it go away? Please tell me how I make it go away? How did you make it go away?â
âI didnât,â Azzi whispers, so soft sheâs not sure Paige heard it; sheâs not sure if she wants Paige to have heard it. Itâs the kind of pain, she thinks, sheâs destined to feel forever. Itâs weaved itself into every crevice of body and now it exists as just another innate part of her. Paige thinks Azziâs learned to live without her but really all Azziâs learned is how to live with these permanent scars of i think iâll miss you forever.Â
âThatâs enough Paige,â Iceâs voice is clearer now, having finally snatched the phone out of her teammateâs grip, âAzzi-â she begins apologetically, âsheâs just drunk. She didnât mean-â
âShe did,â Azzi clears her throat, sinking into the way Jana's arms wrap around her, âsheâs um- sheâs gonna be really hungover in the morning. Make sure she- make sure you give her water but donât- donât give her coffee. Sheâll want it but itâll only make it worse because she uh- she- when she drinks too much, her stomach hurts and the caffeine- it just- it makes it worse so- donât let her drink coffee tomorrow morning okay? And make sure- make sure she eats something before she takes painkillers. And Ice?â
âYeah Azzi.â
âIf she doesnât remember any of this tomorrow morning, please donât remind her.â
***
April 2033
The bar is buzzing with noise by the time Paige and Azzi finally arrive. Itâs an exclusive enough place that they wonât be too bothered by fans asking for pictures and autographs but the size of the crowd still puts Azzi a little bit on edge. She canât help the small smile that flitters across her face when she feels Paigeâs hand resting on her lower back as the blonde guides the two of them through the crowd in search of their teammates. For the last eight years, Azzi has been her own protector and sheâs learned to guard herself but itâs nice -it feels right- to have someone else ready to be her shield too.Â
âYou know Bueckers,â Joyce says as the two of them finally approach the table that had been reserved for the Valkyries, âsome might say that one should be on time when meeting their new teammates. Just a thought.â
âAnd some might say Edwards that being fashionably late is being on time,â Paige quips back.Â
Joyce grins, âalright time for introductions.â
âIâm pretty sure I know-â
âShut up,â Joyce reprimands, throwing an arm around Paigeâs shoulders, âlet me introduce these brand new people to you.â
âTheyâre not-â
âSssshhh. Let me have my fun. Weâll start over here with Westbeld and Booker. You might know them, their teams kicked your ass during the 23-24 season,â Joyce says with a smirk.Â
âOh I do remember that,â Paige says thoughtfully, eyes twinkling with mirth, âwhat happened the season after?â
âDonât be cocky Bueckers. Itâs unbecoming,â Madison chides as she rises from the table to give Paige a hug.Â
âYeah I try not to remember that Elite Eight game thanks,â Laila says, making a disgusted face.Â
Joyce glares at her, âdid I introduce you yet Miss Phelia?â
Laila raises her hands in surrender as Joyce continues to give Paige a tour of the Valkyrie team. Azzi had known that Paige would fit in well with her teammate -really the blonde had the uncanny ability to fit in anywhere- but seeing it realized in front of her, it seems even clearer. Paige feels like the last mosaic piece, slotting in right where she belongs.Â
âThose two over there are our babies,â Joyce points to Haylen and Jayla, âtheyâre like five years old but we love them anyways.â
âIâm almost 25,â Haylen protests.Â
âSee,â Joyce remarks, âliterally children. And that one,â she points to Jana who beams at Paige, âwell you already know her even if you sometimes wish you didnât probably-â
âHey!â
âOh shush Jana,â Joyce says airily, âand I supposed thereâs no point in introducing Azzi to you since yâall came together,â she pauses to look between them, âyâall donât live that close to each other. Why didnât you just carpool with Jana? Iâm pretty sure she lives closer to you.â
Paige opens and closes her mouth a couple of times as Azzi feels her own cheeks heat up at the innocent enough question, âwe um- well it's just- you see- my house is on the way from her parents and she had to drop off Stephie so it just- it just made sense you know? For efficiencyâs sake.â
âOh yeah for efficiencyâs sake. Theyâre both very efficient,â Jana smirks, âmakes a lot of sense.â
Joyce gives all three of them a weird look, âyâall Huskies are strange. It was just a question but anyways,â she grins as she finally steers Paige towards the blonde in the corner and Azzi stiffens at the way Paigeâs body immediately tenses, âa couple of our teammates arenât here but we do have a former teammate. Paige meet ClĂ©mence.â
âWeâve met,â Paige says, attempting to school her features to resemble anything but the discomfort sheâs feeling within, âduring the Olympics that is. Weâve beat France a couple of times.â
Itâs a purposeful word choice, beat instead of played and Azzi's fingers fidget with the hem of her top as she tries to avoid looking at either of the two women.Â
âYes. It is good to see you again,â ClĂ©mence says tersely, her French accent stronger than the last time Azzi had spoken to her. She shakes Paigeâs hand rather formally before her eyes focus on Azzi and she determinedly walks towards the brunette, âand it is really good to see you Azzi. I have missed you.â
âI-â Azzi stutters at the French woman pulls her into a hug; over her shoulder she can practically see steam coming out of Paigeâs ears as she hyper focuses on how ClĂ©mence makes it a point rub her thumb down Azziâs back, âitâs um- itâs good to see you too.â
She pulls away and she can feel the disappointment reverberating from ClĂ©menceâs body as Azzi practically flings herself on the chair next to Jana, wondering what sheâd done to deserve this moment as a punishment for her sins.Â
âSave me,â she pleads as ClĂ©mence and Paige sit as far away from each other as possible, occasionally shooting glares when they think the other isnât looking.Â
âSave you from having two hot women fighting over you?â the center teases, âyou truly have such first world problems Azzi Fudd.â
âTheyâre not fighting over me-â
âAzzi you will have your usual rum and coke no?â ClĂ©mence asks and Azzi looks over to where the francophone is intently staring at her, âI will go-â
âOh thereâs no need,â Paige says immediately, âyou sit ClĂ©mence. You already have a drink. I was gonna go get one for myself and Iâll get Azziâs too. Besides, Azzi's more of a fruity drink girl. Az Iâll get you a piña colada-â
ClĂ©mence narrows her eyes, âmaybe she liked that when she was in college but Azzi likes something different now.â
âShe might like something different now,â Paige counters, standing up aggressively so she towers over the table, âbut sheâs always gonna love a piña colada right Azzi?â
All eyes turn to look at Azzi who wants nothing more than to cower under the table- or hit Jana who seems to find this very unamusinging situation rather entertaining, âI um-â she swallows, âI think tonight calls for something stronger. Round of shots for the table? On me?â
It placates the situation for a while as the rest of the team cheers on the idea, beckoning over one of the bartenders to orders a round of tequila shots for the table. For a moment, Azzi tricks herself into thinking maybe thatâll be the end of ridiculous situations for the night as the team downs shots to Jana yelling âto the Valkyriesâ but she should have known it was wishful thinking.
Half the team ends up on the dance floor, swaying to the mixed rhythm of the music and the newly minted alcohol coursing through their bloodstreams. Azzi watches with a smile as despite her protests, Joyce manages to drag Paige onto the dance floor with her, engaging her in some eccentric dance moves as they try to outdo each other on who can look the silliest. And as the rest of the girls cheer the blonde on, it feels like Paige is chiseling out a place for herself in another part of Azziâs world.Â
âShe is easy to love,â ClĂ©menceâs hot breath fans Azziâs ear as the francophone takes Janaâs empty seat next to the brunette.Â
âClĂ©m-â Azzi sighs.Â
âShe fits in well with the team,â ClĂ©mence continues, something wistful in her voice, âI have seen her play. She will fit in well on the court with you guys as well. She will fit in well next to you.â
âThatâs the hope,â Azzi says softly as she tilts her head to look at the other woman, âyou fit in well too. I mean it ClĂ©m. Weâll miss you at GSV.â
ClĂ©mence smiles bitterly, âI would have liked to stay but they needed the cap space so they could sign her. She- sheâs quite expensive. I mean considering she is casually wearing swarovski crystals on her neck in a bar on a random Saturday night, I am not surprised.â
The two of them laugh despite the gravity that looms heavily over them. Azzi and ClĂ©mence havenât been anything in a long time but sheâd never quite shut the possibility of a potential future done. She can hear the lock ready to click now. Itâs bittersweet doing the right thing but as Paige glances over from the dancefloor, eyes darting cautiously between the two of them, Azzi knows that she doesnât want to keep any other doors open. Not when the one with Paigeâs name etched on the door handle, leads to home.Â
âOne last dance?â ClĂ©mence asks softly, holding out her hand.Â
Azzi hesitates, knowing that it would irritate Paige but she thinks she probably owes ClĂ©mence this and so she smiles and takes the francophoneâs outstretched hand as they join their other teammates. Itâs nothing beyond friendly and they both keep their hands to themselves as they sway to the music, but Azzi can feel the annoyance radiating off of Paige from across the dancefloor. She would never admit it, perhaps itâs a little toxic of her, but thereâs a certain thrill to making Paige jealous. Thereâs something about the way the blondeâs blue eyes flare with ice cold envy, the way her jaw hardens as she grinds her teeth. The way she looks at Azzi like if she had her way sheâd drag the brunette out of the bar and mark her with a possessive youâre mine youâre mine youre mine. It makes Azzi clench her thighs together as she tries to focus on ClĂ©mence.Â
âI understand now,â the francophone says thoughtfully as Azziâs peers up at her in confusion, âwhen you told me that you could not be with me. I get it.â
âI donât-â
âYou are here with me but you arenât actually. You will always be with her,â ClĂ©mence tilts her head towards Paige, âyou always have been. I understand now,â she says again simply before her face hardens, âeven after all those words she said to you on the phone that night.â
Azziâs stomach curls at the reminder. She knows exactly what night ClĂ©mence is referring to. Sometimes when she closes her eyes, itâs those words, coated in anger and malice, that shower around her like acid rain, seeping into her skin and infecting her bloodstream.
âI told you, you deserved better,â ClĂ©mence says and Azzi gulps, âbut you said- you said you deserved worse. I hope you donât believe that anymore Azzi. Just because you hurt her doesnât mean you need to let her hurt you too.â
âI-â Azziâs cut off by a hard body ramming into her own and she feels herself going stumbling back into the unwanted arms of a random man, âIâm sorry,â she says tersely, struggling to get out his grip.Â
âNo worries pretty girl,â he says toothily, the heavy stench of alcohol in his breath making Azzi feel nauseous, âbut now that youâre here, how about I buy you a drink.â
âNo thank you,â Azzi says sternly, trying to push the man away but heâs relentless.Â
âAw câmon donât be like that sweetheart,â the term of endearment sounds like an insult falling from his lips and Azzi loses her patience, stomping her heel into the manâs foot to finally free herself from his grip and he yelps in surprise.
âI said no thank you.â
âWhat the fuck,â the man spits out, standing up as Azzi takes a step back. Heâs got some muscle and although, despite his bravado, she knows sheâs strong enough to take him, sheâd rather not create a scene. Her plan is to walk away. Paige seems to have other ideas, suddenly materializing in between Azzi and the man, a furious look on her face as she squares him up.Â
âDo we have a problem?â the blonde asks menacingly.Â
âNothing other than your little friend here being a fucking bitch.â
Paigeâs eyes darken as she takes a threatening step towards him, prevented from going further only by the way Azzi immediately laces a hand around her wrist, âwhat the fuck did you call her?â
âI called her a-â
âIt doesnât matter,â Azzi cuts in, stepping in between a glaring Paige and a man whoâs clearly underestimating her strength, âlet it go Paige.â
âYeah,â the man mocks, âlet it go Paige.â
âYou fucking-â Paige tries to lunge at him but Azziâs quick to shove her back gently.Â
âDonât cause a scene,â she warns.Â
âAzzi-â
âPaige please.â
âHoly shit,â the man wolf-whistles, âyâall play for the Valks. Youâre Azzi Fudd. I know you.â
âGood for you,â Azzi spits out at him before turning her attention back to Paige, who looks like she could kill the man if given the chance, âcâmon let's go back to our tab-â
âItâs funny youâre acting like such a fucking prude when you have a bastard chi-â
An unmistakable crunch rings out through the bar as the man goes flying backwards. Azziâs knuckles are bleeding as her breath comes out in ragged huffs. She hadnât wanted to cause a scene; could have walked away from a man being a drunken idiot, could have walked away from being called a bitch or hell, even something worse. But the man had attacked the one part of her that sheâd always be ready to go to war for. Heâd brought up Stephie and sheâd seen red. Her fist had moved of it's own accord.
Paige doesnât say anything and Azzi can feel the anger still vibrating from the older womanâs body as she roughly grabs Azziâs unhurt hand.
âLetâs go,â the blondeâs voice is eerily low, âweâre going home.â
***
Itâs a subconscious choice to let Paige drive Azziâs car even though theyâve both sobered up considerably, not that one shot had done much in the first place. Itâs a subconscious choice that Azzi reaches over to lace her fingers through Paigeâs free hand, resting it on her lap, as the blonde use her other hand to grip the steering wheel. Itâs a subconscious choice that they end up driving to Azziâs house in complete silence. Sheâs not sure whoâs mad at who, if theyâre even mad at each other or that man or just the world but she can feel the fury suffocating the air.Â
âWhereâs your first-aid kit?â Paige says gruffly as Azzi unlocks the door.Â
âBathroom,â Azzi says quietly and Paige is off towards it before the word has even fully left the brunetteâs mouth. Azzi scrambles after her, pausing in the doorway as Paige rummages through drawers, knowing better than to interrupt to help when Paige looks livid like this.
âSit,â Paige points to the sink once sheâs finally found the sanitizer and gauze to clean up dried up blood staining Azziâs knuckles.Â
âI can do it my-â
Paige glares at her, âjust sit on the fucking sink Azzi.â
Putting away her own irritation at being told what to do, Azzi lifts herself onto the flat surface of the sink, opening her legs slightly so that Paige can stand between them. Despite still quivering with barely concealed rage, Paigeâs touch is gentle as she dabs at the remnants of red liquid on Azziâs hand.Â
âYou shouldâve just let me punch him when I wanted to,â she says finally.Â
âSo you could be the one bleeding?â Azzi raises an eyebrow.Â
âNo because he wouldâve never gotten the courage to say shit about Stephie if youâd just let me kill him when he called you a bitch,â Paige bites out venomously.Â
âAnd let you go to jail? I couldnât do that to Stephie,â Azzi tries to lighten the tension in the room, âsheâd miss you too much.Â
âThis isnât funny, Azzi,â Paige seethes as she begins to wrap the white gauze around the wound.Â
âI know,â the younger woman says, trailing her other hand down Paigeâs arms trying to soothe her anger, âbut itâs fine-â
âItâs not fucking fine,â Paige yells.Â
âBaby-â the word slips out from Azziâs lips before she can catch it. She hasnât used it for someone other than Stephie in so long that it feels foreign on her lips and yet, it fits exactly right.Â
âDid you call ClĂ©mence that too?â and there it is, the real reason behind the volcano erupting as Paige decidedly looks away from Azzi.Â
Azzi narrows her eyes, âI donât know Paige. Did you call Olivia that?â
âThatâs different,â Paige grits out, âOlivia was my wife.â
Azzi flinches at the word; hates that somebody else had ever had the honor of being called that even if she knows itâs unfair of her to feel that way when sheâs the one that had turned it down first.Â
âExactly,â she says slowly, âyou married someone else-â she holds up a hand when Paige protests, âI know. I know I said no but you married someone else Paige. So you donât get to be mad at me for having something with someone else too.â
Paige is quiet for a moment and Azzi sees the exact moment the fight leaves her body as she lets out a sigh, leaning her head against Azziâs shoulder.Â
âYouâre right,â Paige whispers into Azziâs neck, hands moving to rest against the brunetteâs thighs.Â
Azzi runs her hand through Paigeâs hair, brushing it in tandem with the harmony of her breathing, âwe canât keep throwing the past in each otherâs face, Paige.â
âI know,â Paige breath tickles against Azziâs skin and she shivers in spite of the tense moment,âI just-â the blonde lifts her head to look at Azzi, âI need to know who ClĂ©mence was to you. You- you know what Olivia was to me and I- I just need to know the same about ClĂ©mence.â
âShe-â Azzi hesitates, âwe hooked up a couple of times,â she squeezes Paigeâs hand when the blonde flinches, âbut then she- she wanted more but I couldnât- I couldnât do that. Partly because I didnât- I didnât feel the same- donât look so smug,â Azzi chides when a small grin forms on Paigeâs face, âand partly because we were on the same team. I didnât want to complicate things, not like last time. Feel like I should probably have a rule not to date teammates.â
âRight.â
Azzi watches the cogs turning in Paigeâs brain and she reaches out a hand to ease the creases forming on her forehead, âwhat are you thinking Bueckers?â
âI just-â Paige bites her lip, âwhat about me?â
âWhat about you?â
âI mean weâre gonna be- I mean we are- weâre on the same team too,â Paige says and Azzi can hear the insecurity of will you leave me again weaved through her voice.Â
âYou donât get it yet do you,â Azzi whispers, reaching up to cup Paigeâs face, âbaby you are the exception to all of my rules.â
342 notes
·
View notes
Text
[ sober thoughts ] n. hischier
paring: Nico Hischier x fem!reader
summary : Nico appears on his best friendâs doorstep after the Stadium Series win and confessions are made
warning(s) : slightly drunk nico, mentions of alcohol (but no actual alcohol consumption involved)
authorâs note : pls ignore any typos bc i thought of this while drunk and wrote it while tipsy so i will go back and edit when i am 100% sober. itâs a v short and cute thing that i wanted to write (even tho i am working on like 7 different requests rn)
àŒșââââââââââââââââàŒ»
The moment ânico đđ€â appears on her phone screen, she thinks something is wrong. Sheâs especially worried because itâs nearly two in the morning. Something could be seriously wrong.
The last time they talked, Nico was getting in an Uber to go to the bar after they won the Stadium Series game against the Flyers. That was a half hour after the end of the game and nearly three hours ago at this point.
A very exhausted and confused (Y/N) quickly answers the phone as soon as she processes whatâs going on.
âAre you okay?â she asks, voice slurred with sleep. âDo I need to come get you from the bar?â
âIâm outside your apartment building,â he tells her. âCan I please come inside? Itâs so cold outside and I just played a game in this weather. Please let me in.â
She rolls over and turns on her bedside lamp before she walks to the window. Outside on the sidewalk stands her best friend and captain of the New Jersey Devils. He smiles up at her and waves. âOh my God,â she gasps as she puts on a pair of slippers. âWhy are you just standing outside my building like that?â
âBecause I missed you and wanted to see you,â he tells her as she grabs her keys and leaves her apartment. âIt felt very wrong that I wasnât celebrating with my best friend after one of the most amazing games and one of the most beautiful moments of my career. If I woke you up, Iâm sorry.â
Without tripping down any stairs, she says, âItâs okay. I was just worried you were passed out on the side of the road in East Rutherford.â She pushes the main entrance door open. âYet here you are on my doorstep.â
Nico smiles and stumbles up the steps after he hangs up the phone when he sees her. He trips on the last step. She catches him and he catches himself on the doorway. She can smell the alcohol on his breath because of how close they are to each other, yet her heart races in her chest since theyâre so close to each other.
âAre you drunk?â she asks as she backs away from him with a look on her face. âHow did you get here? Donât tell me you drove because I might kill you and your team is going to be left without a captain.â
âIâve had a few drinks,â he admits to her. âI took an Uber because I did have a few drinks. I didnât drive here. Donât worry. I still have brain cells.â
Nico walks into the building in a hoodie and jeans instead of the tracksuit he showed up to MetLife in. Sheâs happy he is in actual clothes because if he showed up in that tracksuit, she might lose it.
âWhy did you come here instead of going home?â she questions as they make their way up to her apartment. âI thought that maybe after the game youâd celebrate with your teammates then go home to sleep.â
They walk into the apartment as soon as she unlocks the door. âI told you that I wanted to come celebrate with my best friend,â he replies. She closes the door behind her. âEspecially since I couldnât get you into the stadium to watch the game. I wanted you to be a part of this day.â
She pouts and sits on the couch as Nico turns on one of the lamps. âYour family flew in for the game,â she says to him. âI shouldnât take priority over them. I get to see you play all the time. They donât.â
He sits next to her. Not too close but close enough where she can feel the heat coming off his body. If he were to move his knee, it would bump into hers.
âYouâre my family too,â Nico softly says. âI wanted you to be there.â
âIâm your friend, Nico,â she sighs. âIâm not your girlfriend or your wife. I didnât need to be there.â
It feels like she is trying to convince herself too because sometimes the line blurs. Sometimes she doesnât know what she is to him. She has to remind herself that they arenât together, and probably will never be together.
A moment of silence falls over them. She looks at her hands on her lap while she plays with her thumbs. Nicoâs big brown eyes never leave her while she avoids looking at him.
Nico sighs and practically whispers, âI wished you were there as my girlfriend.â
Her head snaps up and she blinks at him. âYou what?â
âI wished you were at the game as my girlfriend,â Nico repeats. âThe entire time I wished that you were at the family skate and sitting in the suite with everyone elseâs families. I wished you had one of those cute jackets that the wives and girlfriends had with my number on it.â
She stares at him until heâs done talking. Then she starts to shake her head. âYouâre just saying that because you have been drinking,â she replies. âYou donât actually mean that.â
Never once has Nico shown that he wanted to be in any kind of romantic relationship with her. Heâs never given her any kind of hint or sign that he wanted to be more than just friends with her.
Theyâve known each other since Nico moved to the US in 2017 to play in the NHL and never once did it seem like he wanted something more.
There is no way he means that.
âDrunk words are sober thoughts,â he says.
âThen tell me when youâre sober,â she retorts. âTell me in the morning if you actually mean it.â
Nico frowns and brushes a loose piece of hair behind her ear. âSchĂ€tzli, you have no idea how long I have wanted to tell you that,â he tells her. âI guess Iâll just have to wait until I wake up before I tell you again.â
Almost as if on cue, he yawns. âGo to sleep, Nico,â she says to him. âTell me whatever you want in the morning. You know where the guest room is but do you need my help in getting there?â
He shakes his head and sinks down against the back of the couch. âIâll get there eventually,â he replies. âYou can go back to sleep.â
With a nod, she stands up. Nicoâs eyes are half open so she takes off his shoes and pulls his legs up onto the cushions. She grabs a blanket to throw over him as he lets out soft snores. The alcohol has finally caught up to him and knocked him out.
âYou have no idea how long I have wanted to hear you say that you wanted me to be your girlfriend,â she whispers to a sleeping Nico. âAll it took you was having a few drinks and winning a big game before you told me how you felt.â
She presses a soft kiss to his temple before she retreats down the hallway to her bedroom just in case he wasnât actually asleep.
â§ïœ„ïŸ: *â§ïœ„ïŸ:*
The smell of coffee is the thing that wakes her up in the morning. Not the sunlight or an alarm. Coffee. It takes a second before she remembers that Nico stayed over.
She remembers Nico telling her that he wishes she was at the Stadium Series game as his girlfriend. She has no idea if he remembers that he said that to her.
Itâs time to find out.
Slowly, she makes her way out to the kitchen. She finds Nico standing at the coffee machine with his back to the hallway. She yawns and walks into the kitchen area.
âMorning,â she softly says so she doesnât scare him. He turns his head and looks at her. âYou making coffee?â
Nico nods and pours them both a cup. He puts cream in her cup and hands it to her. âI figured we could both use a cup,â he tells her. âMe to get rid of this hangover and you because I woke you up at two in the morning.â
She blows on her coffee before taking a sip. âHow much of last night do you remember?â she curiously asks as she leans against the counter beside him.
The moment of silence that follows worries her. He probably doesnât remember what he said, and she isnt going to remind him if he doesnât remember.
He takes a sip of his own coffee before he asks, âAre you asking me if I remember telling you that I wish you were my girlfriend? Yes, if thatâs the case. I told you that I meant it.â
âAnd youâre sober?â
âVery,â Nico replies. âAnd very hungover.â
It surprises her to the point where she almost drops her cup of coffee. Her eyes widen and Nico smiles. âNico, I could kill you and kiss you at the same time because why did it take you playing in one of the biggest games in your career before you-â
Nico takes the cup of coffee out of her hand while sheâs talking then cuts her off by bringing his lips to hers. She gasps in surprise then melts against him as he presses her against the counter. She wraps her arms around his neck and puts her fingers in his hair so he canât break the kiss.
Never in her life did she think that she would be in her kitchen kissing her best friend of nearly seven years. The thought only occurred in dreams and occasionally during games when she found him attractive, which is really all the time.
This is something she has wanted for two years. Since the moment she realized that she was in love with Nico.
He lifts her up and sits her down on the counter. He stands between her knees and rests his hands on her thighs.
It becomes too much for her and she has to pull back for a second to breathe. Her eyes meet his and finds worry in them. âI just- I donât think you understand how long I have waited for this,â she breathes out. âWanted this. Wanted you. I just need a second.â
Nico smiles and pushes her hair behind her ears before he cups her jaw. âIâm such an idiot for waiting so long before I told you,â he replies. âI think Iâve loved you since the moment I met you, SchĂ€tzli.â His voice drops to nearly a whisper and his thumbs brush her cheekbones.
âWeâre both idiots,â she tells him. âIâm glad you meant it though. I thought you were going to get my hopes up.â
He shakes his head and kisses her nose. âI would never lie to you about loving you.â
âWell I love you too,â she says. âJust so you know.â
Nico laughs and envelopes her in a hug. She smiles and happily accepts the hug.
âI told you that drunk words are sober thoughts.â
âI believe you now.â
àŒșââââââââââââââââàŒ»
MASTERLIST
have a request ? check out the guidelines !
wanna be added to the taglist ? fill out this form !
taglist : @dasiysthings @ithinkimokeei @equallyshaw @dancerbailey3 @love4lando @stony1386 @mangoluver @prettyinsatiable
#hockey imagines#hockey imagine#hockey fanfiction#hockey fic#hockey oneshot#nhl imagines#nhl imagine#nhl fanfiction#nhl fic#nhl oneshot#nico hischier#nico hischer x reader#nico hischier fanfiction#nico hischier fic#nico hischier fluff
685 notes
·
View notes
Text
retroactive. â nishimura riki
âitâd be easier if you just didnât ask, but itâd also be easier if she wasnât his last.â
pairing: boyfriend!riki x afab!reader | genre(s): angst | content/warning: both riki and reader are of legal age in this work, consumption of alcohol, mentions of getting drunk, riki calls reader baby and vice versa
word count: 1.8k
authorâs note: iâm back from the dead, hi guys. i hope you enjoy reading thisss. please ignore any typos or grammatical errors (if there are any) and lmk if i missed any warnings.
[đ§ now playing: did you like her in the morning? by NIKI]
you slipped your shoes on, heading out the door. you were on your way to yongsan-gu to accompany your boyfriend, riki, to a get-together at a pub with his friends. it wasnât really your thing to go out drinking with your boyfriend and a few other people at around 10 pm at night, but you agreed to go.
riki said heâd meet you at a nearby landmark in yongsan-gu as itâd take him just a few minutes to get there since the building he works at was in the district. you call a taxi and make your way there. the ride to the district was short, it took around 20 minutes considering how late in the night it was and how you were just within seoul anyway.
the moment you step out of the vehicle, you walked around for quite a bit before you spotted riki, who stood by a bus stop, leaning on its shade, waiting for you to arrive. you ran up to him, hugging him from behind. riki quickly turned around and greeted you with a big smile on his face. âam i late?â you ask, looking up at him. ânope, looks like your just on timeâ he responds, showing you the time on his phoneâs lockscreen. he wrapped his arm around you and rested his hand on your shoulder. âthe pubâs nearby, actually. letâs get goingâ he says. âokay babyâ you reply, taking his hand off your shoulder and locking it with yours as you walk.
after around 5 minutes of walking, you two finally reached the pub. the neon sign fixed on the pubâs entrance flickered and the chatter of people from inside brought the night to life. riki walks in first and you closely follow. you walk past a couple of tables before finding rikiâs group of friends settled on a long table further back into the pub. they all greet the two of you as you sat down on the two empty seats. rikiâs friends from work, from highschool, and from anywhere else were there, considering most of them knew each other anyway, but you didnât expect his most recent ex to be there. his ex of 2 years. you didnât really know that much about rikiâs past relationships, but you for sure knew about this one. she was that one girl he really got along with and they just ended up seeing each other. they had so many common interests and personality traits. i mean, it didnât mean you and him were any less alike, but the fact she was his last just wasnât something that you could move past by.
âhey? you okay?â riki tapped you on your shoulder, snapping you out of your little zone-out moment. âoh, yeah, sorryâ you say, shifting your focus onto the groupâs conversation. âso, riki, y/n, howâs things between you two?â heeseung asks. âweâve been doing well, nearing to our two year anniversary on november actuallyâ riki answers with both of your hands intertwined, resting on his lap. âand our work schedules have loosened up a bit so weâve been able to see each other a lot often recentlyâ you add. the chat between the whole group continued as you two immersed yourselves into it as well.
the night passes but you canât help but notice the stolen glances rikiâs ex has made with both you and riki. theyâve exchanged some words too while in conversation with the rest of the group. maybe you were just overthinking it? you knew it was a get-together with his friends, and you are his girlfriend after all, so maybe there was no malice or intent of her glances. plus, you and riki have been together for quite some time. but two years? him and her? of course it would be impossible for him to forget. but he was with you now, and he looks like heâs the happiest heâs ever been. thereâs no problem there, right? but why has this whole scenario been messing with your brain since the moment you sat down on the table?
you take a shot of soju, slamming the shot glass back down onto the table. you were probably on your third, fourth, maybe even fifth bottle? you donât know, but you were lowkey getting drunk at that point, actually, everyone at the table was getting drunk at that point. after some time, you all decide to stand up and head home. you werenât as dizzy, so you were able to slowly stand upright. you sighed to yourself, the night was finally over.
as everyone walked towards the front door to exit the pub, rikiâs ex stumbles forward. she probably had gotten sloppy after a few bottles of soju. rikiâs hands naturally found their way onto her waist, standing her back upright. âyou okay?â he asks. she nods and hums in respond, with heavy eyelids and a face tinted with the color red. you stood there, blankly watching what had just unfolded before you. you didnât know how to react, you didnât want to cause a scene. were you just being overly sensitive? it was just coincidental that she so happened to have tripped and riki was right behind her. but, you saw the concern in his eyes and how it was second nature for him to have placed his hands onto her waist. this whole thing was most probably not a new thing to riki. how heâd spend the whole night with her, drinking and having fun, how heâd drive her home in the same ford he drives around now, and how heâd probably walk her inside, making sure she got home safe. was the alcohol getting to you? or were these thoughts coming from your completely sane, rational, sober self?
you let it pass until everyone parted ways. riki walked you to his car which was parked somewhere near his companyâs building. he didnât notice anything wrong the whole walk there, but he sensed the tension as soon as he shut the car doors. the air grew thick. you tried avoiding riki by looking out the carâs window, or mindlessly staring into the road ahead. in his mind, he was trying to work out what he had done wrong. were you just sleepy? were you just tipsy? or were you simply just not in the mood? he got a hint that it may have had something to do with his ex, knowing you and how you think about such things.
the car ride to your apartment was silent, with only the sounds of the engine, the other cars passing by, and the road being heard. you two did not exchange a single word the entire drive. riki parked the car by the sidewalk of your building, switching the engine off. he finally broke the silence by saying âhey, iâll walk you inside, âkay? i donât want you getting hu-â but you cut him off halfway âno, riki, itâs alright. iâll be alright.â âbut, baby, itâs like 3 in the morning. it isnât-â and you cut him off once more âi said it was alright, didnât i? just go home, riki.â you said, walking towards the lobby of your apartment building. he walked and followed closely behind you, not letting you go up to your apartment alone, both under the influence and with something going on between the two of you too. âbaby, look, i donât understand whatâs wrong? what did i do?â he asks you while looking you straight in the eye. you couldnât do anything but look away from him as the two of you stood in the elevator going up to the third floor of the building. you storm down the hallway, towards your flat. the tears formed in your eyes, holding them back from streaming down your face. âhey, hey, baby-â riki says, fastening his pace to keep up with you. you grab your keys and unlock the door, shutting it close as you walk in. he stops the door from closing and grabs your hand, stopping you from walking in further into your apartment unit. âwhat is it that you want, riki? WHAT?â you exclaim as you finally turn around to come face to face with him. he comes into your apartment, shutting the door behind him before leaning onto it. the tears formed from earlier began to escape the corners of your eyes as you start to sob in front of your boyfriend. âiâm sorry, baby. w-what did i do?â he says, pulling you into his embrace. all you could do was cry in his arms. he caressed your back, rubbing it up and down to relieve you. he repeated the words âiâm sorryâ all over and over again. the sight of his disheartened girlfriend in his arms, crying her eyeballs out, shattered him into a million pieces.
âwhy are you hugging me right now?â you quietly say, wiping your swollen eyes with the palms of your hand. âwhat do you mean, baby? youâre my girlfriend, why wouldnât i hug you?â riki answered, with tears running down his cheeks too. ât-then what the hell was that earlier? do you still love her? do you love her more than you love me?â you ask him, looking up at him. you pause. âi saw the way you two looked at each other, how you to conversed and interacted still. and iâm probably stupid for thinking all this, knowing you two have moved onto new relationships, but i donât know if i can compete with her. and itâs driving me fucking crazy, riki. itâs driving me fucking insane.â you add. ây/n, baby. past is past, okay? i love you and iâve been the happiest iâve ever been. being with you, being able to love and care for you, itâs all i could ask for. please donât think of whatever happened earlier as something different. please donât take it as a sign that i havenât moved on just yet. she trips and falls, i catch her, and it ends there, okay? but you could trip and fall a million times, iâd always be there to stand you back upright and it doesnât end just there. even if you try and fail, iâll be there for you. even if you cry or weep, iâll be there wiping your tears. even if you jump with happiness, iâll be there celebrating with you.â riki responds as tears continue to come streaming down his face. âi love you, y/n, hm?â he holds you tighter. âi love you too, baby. iâm sorry-â âno, donât be sorry. itâs okay. weâre okay.â you lightly push yourself out of rikiâs embrace and look up to smile at him. you pull him towards your room and you tuck the both of you into your bed.
you drift off into sleep, buried in rikiâs nuzzle. he kisses your forehead and finally falls asleep, holding you close til morning.
#riekirei#enhypen#enhypen x reader#enhypen au#enhypen imagines#enhypen scenarios#enhypen niki#enhypen jake#enhypen jay#enhypen heeseung#enhypen sunghoon#enhypen sunoo#enhypen jungwon#enhypen headcanons#enhypen drabbles#enhypen angst#enhypen smut#enhypen suggestive#enhypen fluff#enhypen soft hours#enhypen hard hours#niki angst#niki fluff#niki suggestive#niki smut#ni-ki#ni-ki x reader#enha niki#ni ki
348 notes
·
View notes
Text
all mine (sakusa x f. reader)
summary: Big brother Sakusa has to deal with his flirty little sister. word count: 6k? warnings: 18+, sexual themes, incest, noncon/dubcon/rape, voyeurism kinda, some yandere themes, sakusa is delusional a/n: just a little thing i wrote out of nowhere to let out some steam and because battle of the garbage dump got released in japan and yeahh i just thought about my handsome man LMAOO. sorry if it's not that great since it's been like how long?? but enjoy!! also no this isn't a part 3 to my fic from 4 years ago lolol and excuse any of my typos đ”âđ«
Sakusa doesnât know if he should be mad or not. The glow of his alarm clock is illuminating his dark room with the soft moonlight slightly peeking in through the blinds. He runs his hands through his curls before he sighs and puts his pillow over his face.Â
He can hear you. The soft moans and suppressed whimpers coming from plump, swollen lips can be easily heard through your thin walls. If he closes his eyes and really focuses, he could hear how wet your pussy is as you get drilled right next doorâright next to the wall, too, because he knows that you prefer your bed in the corner of the room and the sound of the bed creaking is getting unapologetically louder and louder. He was supposed to be asleep an hour ago for early volleyball practice the next morning, but instead heâs listening to you. Every little noise, every creak, every word that slips out of your clenched teeth as you try to be as quiet as you canââPlease,â you beg in a broken voice, âY-youâre so big, âTsumu.â
âTsumu; the little nickname that makes his blood boil and all he can think about is how much of a fucking asshole he is. Yeah, he should be madâhe has every right to be angry, he thinks. Sakusa has to see Atsumu Miyaâs cocky face and disgustingly bleached hair at volleyball practice every week and now he has to hear the fucker himself fucking his little sister into oblivion in the next room.Â
And now itâs getting hot in his own room! He scratches the side of his neck in irritation. Why does it feel like his comforters are suffocating him? Sakusa throws his pillow across the room and rips the blankets off of himself. The tip of his hard cock is peeking out from one of the legs of his boxers, almost as if his body is mocking him for feeling this wayâfor getting hard at the sound of his little sister getting split open. He grimaces for a second, but the guilt and shame can hit him later. Right now itâs too fucking hot.
So, heâs angry because he hates Atsumuâhates how Atsumu has managed to infiltrate his professional life and personal life in such a gross way. Why is Sakusa bitterly pushing his boxers down around his thick thighs? His cock springs free and he grips the shaft harshly.
âFuck,â Sakusa mutters. He starts slowly, gently pumping his hand around his cock. Itâs warm in his hand and twitching at the small bursts of pleasure, enough to allow a pained moan out through gritted teeth. When was the last time he even had someone over to use their body how he pleased? He wishes he could ignore itâignore youâbut all he does is pick up his pace as he listens to the sound of your cunt getting destroyed and your sickeningly sweet begging for Atsumu to fuck you harder.
Oh, heâs madâso mad that everything is throbbing from his head to the head of his dick. He hisses at the pain in his temples but it does little to stop him from continuing to fist his cock.
ââTsumu!â he hears you cry out. The sound of your headboard slamming against the wall is getting even louder, accompanied by the slick noises coming from between your legs and skin slapping against skin. The room feels like a sauna at this point, but nonetheless, Sakusa squeezes his eyes shut as he picks up speed and fucks into his own hand like a pervert at the sound of his little sister.Â
Would you be scared of him if you knew how badly he wanted to be in Atsumuâs place? How he wants to rip Atsumu away from you and make you cum on his cock the way he wants to? His skin is getting sticky from his sweatâhis arm is getting tired from how fast heâs pumping his cock, desperate to release his frustrations in a stream of hot white liquid and how he wishes he could paint your face with it. He imagines how your lips would feel wrapped around his cockâif you would beg for him through watery eyes and tear-stained puffy cheeks trying to put all of him in your mouth. Is his cock too big for you? Is your pussy as warm and sopping wet as he imagines it is?Â
âIâm gonna cum!â you scream, âIâm cumming! Iâm cumming!â Your voice cracks when you chant for Atsumu. Sakusaâs whole body tenses, every single nerve and muscle in his body on fire because damn it, he wants to be the reason why you're screaming and convulsing and crying from pleasure like a whore.
Then with a few more strokes of his cock, he releases his cum in heavy streams that land in a sticky mess on his sheets and lower abs. He groans as his cock twitches against his aching fingers. After a few seconds, he lets go of his shaft and lets it fall against his pelvis. Itâs like the whole world has stoppedâthereâs no more erotic noise coming from your side of the wall. It would have been completely silent if it werenât for the sound of labored breaths and giggling. He wonders if Atsumu is going to cuddle you to sleep and stay the night or if heâs going to run away and leave you yearning for more.
Embarrassment creeps onto his cheeks with how fast he came, but as fast as the embarrassment comes, the guilt suddenly settles deep into his stomach, into his joints, into every muscle of his being. Sakusa is disgusted with himself for letting his lust take over during a moment of weaknessâlust for his imouto who doesnât know any better, who is in the prime of her life to fuck around and find out without much of a care in the world, who doesnât think about the consequences. Sakusa canât do that like you do, itâs not built into him except for the few times where he did let looseâalthough heâs not as sloppy as you. Sometimes it feels like you were raised in different households. It shouldnât be a surprise to him that you flirt and fuck with his volleyball teammatesâor anyone that breathes in your direction for that matter. It shouldnâtâbut for the first time in his life, he asks himself that if you undress for anyoneâŠthen why not for him?
He curses to himself. His expectations are too unrealistic. Youâre siblings! And he knows that you both could and should never unless you wanted to ruin your relationship and test your morals. He reaches over to the towel hanging on his desk chair and quickly wipes away the mess he made. A nice, steamy shower pops into his mind, but heâs too tired to wash away his sins.
The room gets colder and his transgressions have nowhere to go, marinating into his skin, reminding him that heâs a shitty big brother for wanting to ravage you from the inside. As his mind goes hazy from how sleepy he is, he also hears a door open and shut followed by heavy footsteps and another doorâyour door and the front door. A small smirk finds its way across his lips. Sakusa may have a sick attraction to his little sister that he may have recently discovered, but at least heâs never lonely. You, howeverâ
You can never make them stay long.
~
âOmi-nii~!â Sakusa hears you sing, bouncing through the hallways of your shared apartment until he feels you wrap your arms around his naked waist. Heâs in the kitchen warming up the leftovers you cooked earlier in the day over the stove, looming over the counter and scrolling away at his phone.Â
He scoffs and leans away from you in mock disgust, âWerenât you sick last week? Get off me before you give me your disease.âÂ
âI donât have one! Iâm clean!â you whine with a pout, squeezing your arms around him tighter. You press the front of your body against his back, a gesture that makes Sakusa feel fuzzy, especially when you also press your nose against his bare back to inhale his scent. Thereâs something so intimate with the way youâre not even scared to hold him while heâs not wearing a shirt. His skin is fresh from the shower and his hair is slightly damp. He pulls away to look at you when he notices how nicely dressed you are.Â
With a raised brow, he asks, âWhere the hell are you going this late?â You pull away from him to adjust your dress. He turns to face you, his eyes going up and down your body with sick thoughts beginning to cloud his brainâsick, twisted thoughts that should have never crossed his mind.
âFirst of allââ you say, rolling your eyes at him, ââitâs not late. Itâs literally only six-thirty, you weirdo.â Sakusa narrows his eyes as he begins to scowl. But despite his obvious look of you better not be going out like that, you happily ignore him. âSecond of all, Iâm going out on a date!âÂ
âA date with who?â he asks sharply, folding his arms against his chest and straightening his posture. He always does this to tower above you, to hopefully make you feel smaller than you are. It worked much better when you were both younger.
You bite your lip before giggling his name, âAtsumu.â You seem to get bubbly as his name rolls off of your tongue naturally with a smile playing at your lips and warm cheeks to accompany it. Maybe his heart aches a bit with jealousy when you say that stupid name, a feeling that makes the guilt settle heavily again. The last time he heard you say his nameâmoan his nameâwas a few nights ago when he did something no brother should ever do, separated by a few inches of thin walls. As quick as he is to question you, he is also quick to shake those damning thoughts out of his head before they manifest into something more and he ends up losing it in the kitchen you share. Heâs scared that he might never forgive himself if he does.
âSince when the hell did you get so close?â Sakusa shoots you another question with furrowed brows. As monotonous as Sakusa usually is, the distaste is present in his tone and his stance.
âI donât know,â you sigh so dreamily, âIt just happened. I didnât know he could be so sweet.â He could vomit if he had the chance. Out of all peopleâAtsumu? Really? Sweet?!
âWell, I guess you do have a disease then,â he retorts, sticking his nose up in disgust, âHeâs sick in the head, (Y/N). I thought you had better taste in men but here you go fucking around with my teammateââ
âOmi-nii...â you pout.
ââlike heâs the only guy you know. I expected better from you,â Sakusa continues with a puff of his chest. He turns away from you to turn the stove off. âHeâs always sick, too. Always getting a cold and then going to practice like heâs not contagious.âÂ
Itâs Atsumu taking his little sister away from him that angers him more than he could ever imagineâbut itâs also knowing that he will never be the one between your thighs that makes him so disappointed. Thereâs a silence in the room that creeps up his back.
âYouâve been so out of character recently, Nii-san,â you ponder behind him, placing your finger on your chin to pretend that youâre thinking, âItâs not like you to lose your cool over a guy. Are youâŠ
âŠjealous?â
No.
Heâs just looking out for youâheâs your big brother after all! But he doesnât know how to respond and stands still, holding his breath. Deny, deny, deny. He turns his head to look at you in his peripherals; youâre staring right at him with the same sweet eyes that he remembers from your childhood. Maybe he has been out of characterâdid you really notice? As it feels like some kind of tension is suffocating him and the ground is going to swallow him, you crack a wide smile and start giggling uncontrollably, which instantly makes him frown.Â
This is why you two are complete oppositesâSakusa; as serious as ever and always playing the voice of reason like a good older brother, and you; the first to laugh when itâs quiet and always being the fun little sister when things get too serious for your liking. You skip towards him and wrap your arms around him again with the biggest smile on your face, snuggling your nose into the skin of his back.Â
âYouâll always be my favorite, Omi-nii. I love you more than any boy in the world,â you hum. He wonders if you can hear his heart beating louder with each syllable of your words.
Sakusa could laugh. Usually he would, before pushing you off and scolding you for getting too close to him. But his heart continues to thump and his voice gets stuck in his throat when your hand slides down his abs and brushes lightly over his twitching cock. Itâs not like him to lose his composure like this. You place a saccharine kiss on the curve of his back before you hastily let go of him and walk away.Â
You didnât touch him enough for him to say anythingâto reprimand you for touching your Onii-san like thatâbut just enough for your touch to linger where it shouldn't.Â
~
A soft knocking at Sakusaâs bedroom door stirs him awake. He groggily twists and turns under his bed sheets, irritated that someone would wake him so late at night. He hears the âclickâ of the door knob and the hinges creaking as the door opens.
âOmi-nii?â you whisper gently from your place at the door. Sakusa ignores you easily, choosing to keep his eyes shut in hopes that maybe youâll leave him alone and let him have his peace.Â
âOmi-nii,â you call his name louder and more firmly, âOnii-san, are you awake?âÂ
What a stupid question, he thinks to himself, but Sakusa figures that youâre not going to leave his room any sooner, so he finally opens one of his eyes slowly to see your head peeking into his room. Itâs darkâyouâre almost just a black silhouette in his blurry vision, but he can make out your soft and surprisingly tired features just enough. âWhat, (Y/N),â he groans, his voice gravelly with fatigue.Â
âCan I sleep with you tonight?â Your voice is timid when you askâit brings Sakusa back to when you two were younger and you were just as shy to ask him the same questionâand the same question is what prompts him to suddenly sit up, letting his bed sheets fall to expose his lean upper body. He rubs at his eye before looking up to gaze at you, clad in a shirt of his (that he begrudgingly noticed went missing months ago) engulfing your figure.
Omi-niiâs shirts are way more comfier than mine, you would whine. He would roll his eyes and snap at you, usually, but would still let you take his shirts anyway. The perverted part of him secretly loves how his clothes fit you.
Sakusa doesnât ask and figures that itâs best that he doesnât. He sees the way youâre twiddling with the bottom of his shirt between shaky fingers. He could tell you that he was right all along, laugh in your face, anything to rub it inâinstead, he pulls the covers aside and scoots over, creating an empty space for you, just for you.
âCome here,â he mutters, loud enough for you to hear. You move instantly, your feet delicately pitter pattering against his hardwood floors. The mattress dips lightly as you climb into his bed. You pull his blanket up to your chin instantly and Sakusa grabs whatever he can get. âGo to sleep, (Y/N).â Without another word, he turns away from you and settles into his sleeping position on his side.
After a few moments of silence, you mumble something Sakusa canât quite make out. And when he chooses not to respond, you say it again, âCan you hold me, Onii-san?â Then his body completely stiffens in response. He always said yes when you two were kidsâhell, even when you were teenagers and it was definitely considered inappropriate by then. Would it be weird if he said no now?
But he sighs, knowing that he can't just say no. He turns around and drags himself closer to you, lifting his arm so that you can move underneath it and press yourself into the front of his body. His breath hitches as you do, an all too familiar heat igniting in his stomach as the curves of your body fit perfectly against him.
When he wraps his arm around you, he suddenly feels so complete and so awful, almost having to hold back on how tightly he wants to really hold you. This time he can inhale the scent of your hairâa mixture of whatever shampoo and conditioner you keep in your rotation and your favorite leave-in conditioner. The skin on your arms is soft from your lotion, your legs are smooth and buttery against him, and fuck are you so warm. He could absolutely eat you up right here if youâd let him. Maybe in your vulnerable state of mindâŠyou wouldnât say no.
Sauksa doesnât know what demon has decided to possess him. Heâs been thinking too much for the past few weeks for sure. A little earworm is corrupting him, whispering in his ear and daring him to do something and destroy you.
His hands are moving on their own. They slip underneath your shirtâhot fingertips caressing your skin so carelessly and trailing up and down your hips. He wants to laugh because youâre only wearing panties. How obvious can you get? If you were thinking about him the same way he thought about you, you could have just said something.
You tense up at his unexpected touch, but donât move away from himâyou donât even say a word, not when his hand slides up to cup one of your tits to pull you closer to him, not when he decides to press his hard cock against your ass, not a single word.
Sakusa thinks heâs been too hard on himself recently, especially with how his feelings about you have changed so drastically. Youâre not ready for him like that, that much is obvious with how much youâre shivering, but he deserves this after all the mental anguish you put him through because of how stupid you are.
First, you fuck his dumb teammate in the apartment that Sakusa pays for. And out of all the teammates, you choose the one who used to have piss blond hair back in high school and still slurs his words. Second, you have the audacity to touch him and kiss him and tease him, knowing that he can never have you the way that he wants. Third, you wake him up in the middle of the night to sleep in his bed in one of the shirts heâs been looking for for months and just your thin panties that leave so little to the imaginationâ
âOmi?â you quavered, knocking him out of his thoughts. Oh, he didnât realize how hard he was squeezing you or how rough his grip is on your perky tits. He also didnât realize how he started grinding himself against your ass, wedging his covered cock between your covered asscheeks in an attempt to feel the warmth from your core. The guilt should have been settling in him again, yet to his surprise, he feelsâŠnothing. All he wants is to hold you down against the bed and wreck your insides until you bleed and beg for him.Â
âOmi-nii!â A panicked gasp escapes you and suddenly Sakusa is on top of you, holding you down by your wrists. You gaze up at him, lips parted in shock, eyes so wide, and the first thing that goes through his mind is beautiful. He leans down and presses his lips against yours, leaving you so shocked that your entire body freezes.
âHold still,â he murmurs, and his words flip a switch in your brain. Youâre already fighting against him, desperate to escape from his hold on your wrists and the sins heâs planting on your lips and for the first time in your life youâre actually scared of him.Â
Sakusa grips your wrists even tighter and hisses as you squirm, âI said hold still.âÂ
Then you force yourself to relax with no choice but to let Sakusa explore your mouth. Your hesitation is obvious (of course, it is) and instead of pulling back and knocking sense into himself, heâs offendedâout of all the guys you let violate your body, you wonât let your own brother do the same?Â
He disconnects from you to grip both your wrists above your head, holding you down easily with one hand. Then his other hand quickly pushes the bottom of your shirt up to your stomach to display your bottom half and grabs the top of your panties. Youâre horrified as Sakusa effortlessly rips your panties off of you and throws the shredded pieces off to the side, exposing you to the cold air and to your brotherâs eyes.Â
Your brotherâs eyes. You can feel the bile coming up to your throat at the realization. Your brother is going to do something to you against your will and you canât do anything to stop him because heâs bigger and stronger than you and you live alone together. As you make eye contact with him, itâs like you canât even recognize him. You jerk your body away in a feeble attempt to free yourself, but itâs no use.
âStop!â you cry, ashamed, scared, and so confused, âNii-san, stop!âÂ
He splits your thighs apart with his own muscled thighs and you feel so weak trying to close them again, to hide that part of you that your big brother should never ever see.Â
But to Sakusa, itâs a sight that he wishes he could see over and over again and he has no problem taking his chances if it means that he can have youâheâs already gone way too far, past the point of return, and he doesnât want to care anymore about what consequences his actions might bring. A small smirk appears on his face as he looks down at you, so vulnerable and small underneath him. He doesnât want to waste timeâhis boxers are already down his thighs and his cock is free. Youâre looking down at his cock with pure fear on your faceâfuck, heâs big, so big that youâre dumbfounded that heâs even real. But heâs also your brother. You literally grew up together and he still takes care of you and you see each other everyday.
You want to look away but you canât. Although your vision is blurry due to your tears, you can still see him and only him. âThis is why you asked to sleep with your nii-san tonight, right?â he breathes, looking down at you with a hunger in his eyes that youâve never seen or noticed before. Youâre shaking your head no. Never. You were just sad and needed your big brother to comfort you without asking any questions.
âStop lying to me, (Y/N). You know what youâre doing,â he scoffs, âIâll take care of you. Just like I always have.â Then, he grabs the back of your thigh with his free hand to hoist one of your knees up against your chest, exposing you even more than you already are. Before you can even process it, the head of his hard cock is pressing against your entrance so delicately and so carefully but itâs terrifying all the same.
A loud gasp escapes you and you attempt to yank yourself away from him again. Tears are fully streaming down your face now, dampening your hair and the sheets. Your chest is tighteningâ youâre so scared. You donât even know what Sakusa is talking about so you're even more puzzled. As far as you know, youâve been the same as youâve always been. âDonât d-do that,â you beg with a crack in your voice, âOmi-nii, please.â
But Sakusa is pleased to hear your broken voiceâirritated that you donât want him to continue, sure, but pleased nonetheless. Heâs always wanted to see you like this underneath him and he finally has you. Your legs spread wide open for him to feast on is something that seemed so unobtainable yet youâre in his bed, exposed and ready.
Please.
He pushes through the tight rings of your pussy until he completely fills you upâthe tip of his cock is fighting its way through plush walls to kiss your cervix and you swear that your world has shattered into a million tiny pieces. A sob breaks free from your throat.
The room is ice cold. Thereâs no more air in your lungs as you convulse around him. You can hear your heartbeat thumping in your ears but everything is so silent. Sakusa lets out a breath that he didnât know he was holding and suddenly everything is okay nowâhe knows that there was no demon possessing him to think about you in such a dirty way because it was really him all along. All his sick fantasies and insatiable desires, dreams of devouring you, and all those sleepless nights imagining what you would look like with his cock so deep inside you that you couldnât breatheâit was just him, so painfully in love with you even if he canât have you. And now heâs inside of you. Heâs actually inside of you.
âFuck,â he curses in a strained voice, âYouâre so fucking tight, fuck.â It feels as if your mind and body are attempting to recover from the shock of Sakusa forcing himself inside your cunt but thereâs no time for recovery at allâhell, youâre both surprised that he even managed to slide into you as easily as he did.
Then he starts moving, slow and steady to open you up more. The sting of him stretching you is enough to make you let out a few wails between quivering lips. You can physically feel your walls shudder around his length and your nerves are practically screaming, ringing your inner alarms, knowing that this is so fucking wrong.
âGet the fuck off of me!â you sob, attempting to jerk your wrists away from his one-handed grip. Youâre not even sure when you became so weak, even with adrenaline coursing through your veins. And youâre even more shocked when he lets go of your wrists for a split second only to hold you by the throat firmly.
âYou need to shut the fuck up sometimes,â Sakusa breathes with a hint of annoyance. Your shaky hands find their way to wrap around his wrist, nails clawing at his skin, hopelessly trying to loosen his grip. His cock is still moving dangerously inside you, filling you up and then leaving you empty with just his tip, only to fill you up again. The slow rhythm of his hips pressing against yours is tormentingâyour skin is crawling with every moment that your hips meet and you wonder if he moved more then would time go by faster?Â
Labored breaths and wheezes are the only sounds that youâre able to let out with Sakusaâs hand on your throat. Thereâs fatigue creeping in your bones yet you feel the energy in your veins and it doesnât make any sense. Nothing makes sense and everything hurts and justâwhy?
âC-CanâtâŠbreathe,â you manage to gasp out. As much as you want to stay awake, afraid of what your older brother might do to you if you pass out, you can see your vision starting to blur and your brain beginning to turn into mush. Your hands are loosening their grip around his arm thatâs holding you captive. Heâs squeezing your throat tighter and tighter.
You just needed someoneâneeded your onii-san to help you during this fucked up time between you and Atsumu. Usually heâd be on top of you like this, fucking you until you cry for him and cum all over his cock. Youâd moan and drool and begâanything for him to claim you over and over again. Instead of seeing stupid bleached hair and flirty eyes, you see black curls and dispassionate voids gazing at you as youâre about to pass out and itâs like he doesnât even fucking care! You just wanted to feel better and to feel your onii-sanâs comfort again and he decides to touch you andâ
He presses his forehead against yours all of a sudden, and you can barely hear him when his lips start moving. â...What?â you choke out through wheezes.Â
âIf you want me to let go, you have to let me fuck you as hard as I want,â he repeats himself firmly. You donât realize that heâs stopped moving inside you, leaving you feeling oddly empty. All you know is that you need to breathe and maybe that desperation is what makes you attempt to nod your head in agreement. A smirk appears on Sakusaâs face and before you can even register what's going on, heâs straightening up to thrust his cock even deeper into your core and he finally lets go of your throat.Â
Youâre coughing and sputtering, oddly embarrassed at how much saliva youâre spitting out, and youâre hyper aware that you have him inside you again, deep inside you and painfully stretching you to the point where youâre afraid that heâs going to rip you in half. Sakusa grabs the backs of your thighs and presses both your knees against your chest again, leaving his hands there to hold you down once more and to expose your pussy to the cold air. You feel the warmth spread across your cheeks from how embarrassing it is to be on full display and how repulsive it is that itâs Sakusa between your legs to ogle at you as much as he pleases. You wonder what changed between you twoâhas he always felt this way? It makes you sick to your stomach to imagine that your brother that you love so dearly and looked up to your whole life wants you and itâs diabolical how this is what he wants from you.
And when he starts thrusting harder than before, slamming his cock into you with such a force that your body lurches with his movements, your brain is back to turning into mush and a part of you wishes that you did pass outâat least you wouldnât have to be conscious to feel everything. You canât help but let out quiet whimpers and gasps that donât even sound like you. It hurtsâthe stretch of his thick cock is so unbearable and his hands on your thighs are sure to leave ugly bruises.Â
âYou feel so good,â he almost laughs, like he canât believe this is happening. You are as soft as he imagined, maybe even more, and how easily your pussy starts creaming around him makes his heart skip a beat. When he presses his forehead against yours again, you want to recoil even though you physically canât. You donât want to look him in the eyes yet you canât bring yourself to look away. You donât even know if you can hate him after this and Sakusa knows thatâhow you love him so much, even if itâs not the way that he wants you toâ
âbecause you need him.Â
Itâs nauseating how much you still need him. Itâs horrifying how your legs are beginning to shake from how deep he is and how heâs shoving himself against your cervix unkindly. Most of all, itâs disgusting how you can feelâeven hearâthe puddle pooling from your cunt, forcing you to stretch to accommodate his sizeâand maybe in the midst of your hysterical state, maybe Sakusa feels good, too.
You canât admit thatâyou definitely donât want toâbut for fuckâs sake, you know what your body likes and although itâs Sakusa punishing you in the worst way possible, you recognize that tightness in your stomachâthe corrupt feeling that makes you scream and cry and beg, that makes your body writhe in desperation to have more. Fuck, itâs morally wrong but at the same time, your body loves to feel full and stretched to its limits. Youâre so sad that Atsumu âbroke upâ with you (you werenât really dating in the first place) because Atsumu knew your body so well and his dick was huge. You really shouldnât be comparing since the thought is so sickening, yet the way Sakusa is splitting you open is differentâso different from Atsumu with no gentleness, no delicacy, just pure lust and a desire to fuck you until you faint and itâsâŠbetter. It shouldnât be better, shouldnât feel as good as it does, but it's better.
When the realization hits you, the shame and embarrassment floods your stomach, tooâhow could you let your own brother fuck you like this and how could you enjoy it? And now youâre angry at yourself, for how Sakusa is making you feel, how your body is reacting, how raw and wet your pussy, how Atsumu blindsided you, how this whole situation is so fucking unfair.
âOmi-nii,â you whine with a dry throat, reaching up to grab his thick biceps, all tensed up and veiny from gripping your thighs and turning them purple. His muscles are so well-defined that you almost forget that heâs your brother and start melting into his skin. The base of his cock is hitting your clit every time your hips meet, sending shocks of pleasure all throughout your core. The walls of your cunt are convulsing around him. It shouldnât feel good, it really shouldnât, but the burning sensation on your thighs from having your knees pressed against your chest to expose your cunt and Sakusa carving the shape of his cock into your pussy is the best fucking thing youâve ever felt in all your years of living. As guilty as you feel for wanting more, you start to beg for him, âPlease make me cum, Omi-nii.â
A smug smile plays on his lips. Your pussy is dripping everywhere, making wet noises every time Sakusa moves, and he thinks heâs finally satisfied. Not completely though, because he wants you to squirt on his cock and he wants you to squirt on his cock every night from now on. He deserves it, deserves this, deserves to be the one inside of you and claiming you and pumping you full of cum.
He leans down and captures your lips with his once again, and this time you let him slip his tongue against yours in a messy passionate kiss. When he lets go of one of your thighs to rub at your clit with his thumb and your body tenses up harshly as a result, he sneers at you, âCum all over my cock, you bitch.âÂ
Then your cunt tightens around him and you hate that heâs being so mean to you but you cry and scream and dig your nails into his muscles like youâve never came before because you like how mean he is and the only thing you can pathetically moan is Onii-san~!
He doesnât stop when you cum, chasing his own high to drown your pussy in his sticky seed and hopefully force another climax out of your body to feed his ego, so he wraps his hands around your throat again while youâre delirious and kisses you again and again. âYou can fuck whoever you want,â he mutters against your plump lips, âThink that you know what love is when you have some other loser inside youââÂ
 ââbut this stupid cunt is all mine.â
#yandere haikyuu#yandere haikyuu x reader#yandere haikyuu imagines#yandere haikyuu smut#haikyuu smut#kiyoomi sakusa x reader#yandere sakusa x reader#yandered sakusa kiyoomi#sakusa kiyoomi x reader#yandere sakusa kiyoomi#yandere kiyoomi sakusa#sakusa kiyoomi smut#kiyoomi sakusa smut#sakusa#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu thirsts#tw yandere#tw noncon
905 notes
·
View notes
Note
I'm so normal about Nikto rn
Mildly nsfw?? Idk just a heads up
But just
Nikto, gripping her hips, thinking to himself: She's just being friendly- she's just being friendly- think pure thoughts
Y/N, sitting on his lap and holding his face hostage between her titties, thinking to herself: I wonder when he's gonna make the first move... do I have to make it if he doesn't? Oh my god what if I've been reading him wrong all along and he doesn't even like me??
Nikto: Well, maybe I am obsessed with you
Y/N: Well, maybe I like that :lipbite:
Flirtatious Reader x ...Dense? Nikto
Fem! Reader coded, BUT it can be viewed as gender-neutral if you squint. đ©·đđ
Word Count: 2237
đȘŒ
Reader is addressed as "You". No Y/N used.
May be self-indulgent. May be a projection of my own feelings. Oops. đ
Please read the * at the end of the post for my clarification đđ©”đ€.
Edit: Minor typos. I fucking hate EVERYTHING!!!
âSUGGESTIVE CONTENT AND SOME DISTURBING IMAGERY BELOW THE CUT â (No sex nor anything overly grotesque, but includes some descriptions of both). Readers are warned for suggestive content.
ââââââââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
Well.
The title is perhaps a teeny, weeny little tiny bit misleading đ€âŠ
âŠ
âŠWho am I kidding đ,, it's as misleading as it gets LMAO
Because let's not kid ourselves here: Nikto is NOT "dense", NOT an "oblivious" man, NOR is he the type to be misinformed about someone's objective[s].
Nikto is a perceptive man â he's interrogated enough people to know what makes them tick, to distinguish lie from truth.
If somebody's intentions aren't innocent and they have ulterior motives, Nikto is always the first to know; it's his job to be informed, after all.
Hence, he notices the intonations of someone's voice growing or lowering, the imperceptible change in pitch, their nervous stutter as they unconvincingly concoct a lie, how their testimony does not align with the facts, and how they've suddenly become fidgety and shift from his scrutiny...
Hence, he recognises the subtle shifts in someone's facial expressions, can read between the lines of their non-verbal gestures, their change in behaviour, their overall unease expressed without them realising it, how they're giving themselves away no matter what they sayâŠ
Hence, he takes notices the way that someone fiddles agitatedly with something in their hands, how they pick at their nails in an almost panicked way or dig their fingernails into the skin of their palms, how they're biting their bottom lip or chewing on their cheek, how their smile is lopsided and doesn't quite reach their eyes, how they avert their gazeâŠ
Nikto is anything but perceptive. He isn't oblivious â not "ignorant", not "unaware", and certainly not "stupid", or any other words synonymous with the previous â especially when it regards what people think of him.
How people think that he's disgusting.
How everyone avoids him like the Black Death, as if he's diseased and close proximity could kill you. As if his disfigurements were contagious, and the best bet would be to stay far, far away from the diseased.
Therefore, he's not oblivious that the words which you would whisper into the brocoli ears obscured by his mask are innuendo for something for more; he's not oblivious of the sexual nature of your hands absentmindedly caressing his lower abdomen, simply inches from his clothed crotch; he's not oblivious that your touches are quite risqué, that you would provoke him on purpose, that you would sit directly on his lap and feign innocence as you would flutter your eyelashes and smile ever so sweetly.
Nikto is perceptive. Very perceptive. And he's certainly not stupid...
...they just don't perceive your flirtatious actions as anything other than some joke.
So, he has rationalised your flirtatious behaviour as friendliness. As how you express your personal affection. Or, affectations.
Whatever it is that you're expressing, it must be a joke. Surely.
Since you're the Beauty, he's the Beast. But, unlike the Beast, he is a monster which cannot be redeemed. He's been cursed to suffer mortal purgatory, while immortal, demonic voices haunt him every hour, every minute, every second of every day. It's torture.
And you want to torture him some more by tormenting him with your unashamedly forward displays, your devilish seduction, tempting him into finally taking what he's been desiring ever since you arrived in his life.
How could you want him? Do you even want him?
No. You don't. There is no way that you do.
Because he's not talkative like some of the other operators, not hilarious like the colleagues who make you laugh, not affectionate like a lover could, not good company, not a good person as a whole.
He's introverted to a concerning amount, so silent that sometimes he appears deceased as he lies next to you on the nights you come over.
Maybe it all used to come naturally to him, but it's a struggle to feign his role as a functioning human being, so to actually be one? Sometimes he questions if he's more monster than man, as that role seems to be effortless.
Perhaps this is all some heartless idea of a practical joke, some sort of sick sense of satisfaction arising in you to toy with Nikto's emotions. And, like a child bored of that toy, discard it in favour of a newer, better, prettier one.
Why would you want to be around him? What is there to like? Is there even anything to like?
Nothing. Nothing at all.
Because what's there to like? Frankly, if he doesn't like himself â or selves â then how could he expect you to like him? All of him? Them?
This isn't affection, he would tell himself; either it's disingenuous and forced, or you're faking it for your own amusement.
Or... maybe it is genuine, and it isn't fake... but it's all an act of pity, since you feel sympathy for the lonely outcast and have some sort of strange moral obligation to a lunatic as fucked-up, ugly, and disfigured as him, whose been unable to have a meaningful relationship â platonic or otherwise â in years.
Especially right now, with you straddling his lap and cradling his masked face in between your breasts, he still can't wrap his head around it, and it's all incomprehensible.
At times, Nikto has considered that he's overthinking it, and that you have no ill intentions, and you're just innocent and clueless with how much you affect him.
And it would have been endearing if it wasn't so fucking frustrating.
With that in mind, for him to make the first move and jeopardise what he thought you thought was a strictly platonic friendship? He couldn't be more sorry, and would leave you alone forever and never speak to you again, even if it was physically painful and equivalent to ripping his own heart out and squeezing it until its contents popped â just for the pain and the heartache to go away forever.
...
Seriously. It's so fucking frustrating, and it's as if he's being wilfully ignorant or something, and doing it on fucking purpose.
He's delusional, yes, and you've always acknowledged the fact that more than a few screws were loose, but the entire mechanism, but it pisses you off that he continues to delude himself, rather than accept that your affection is genuine, and not some cruel joke.
You don't get bored of him, and won't. Ever.
Yes, he's not talkative, but you find solace in presence and relish the peace and quiet; yes, his sense of humour is nonexistent, but you don't need to be laughing when he still brings a loving smile to your lips; yes, he's introverted, but does that really matter? To you, you being the exception to his isolation is worth everything.
Do you care that he's not a good person? No. To some extent, neither are you â you're no saint yourself. Nikto's morals may not be grey, but smudged entirely, and his methods questionableâŠ
âŠand? You don't have it in you to care. Because it has reached a point where Nikto genuinely cares for you, and you likewise for him, and his actions demonstrated what he could never convey through words; that he would never, ever hurt you. And that's enough.
As for him not being naturally affectionate?
Well. You've tried everything: guiding his hands onto your hips; sitting in his lap and straddling his lower half, arms around his neck; hell, even flashed your tits under the guise of the clasp of your unintentionally becoming undone, and, oh, could you please do it for me, Nikto? You aren't bothered by the nudity? Sorry. That was just a wardrobe mishap. You don't mind, right? You can touch all you like, because I don't mind.
But he doesn't respond. Doesn't fucking do anything. Just has his shoulders tense and arms loose by his sides, not reciprocating any touch, not touching you unless you give him permission, as if he's been lobotomised and can only take explicit orders.
You're exasperated. It's exhausting.
But how much more goddamn obvious can you be? What will it take for him to open his eyes and see that this isn't a game to you? That you're willingly giving yourself to him, because you want to? Because you want him?
And, yes, his hands twitch with the gnawing itch to touch you; his body shakes with anticipation, antsy; his shoulders are tense, back straight as a plank, muscles flexing with restraint; and, of course, he's so fucking hard that he's almost nauseous.
But will he dare misinterpret your suggestive behaviour as anything more than flirtation, teasing, and risk jeopardising his whole friendship with his one and only friend? No. Not a fucking chance.
One of these days, you swore, you were going to tear off his mask clean off his face and grab his jaw to roughly kiss him on his scarred, mishapen, and malnourished lips, only pulling away when neither of you can breathe, then look him dead in those steel blue eyes and confess that you don't give a shit what, who, or why he is, only that you want him, uncaring of the whats, the whos, and the whys â especially the "whos".
No amount of initiating physical contact could entice him to touch you. You were at wits' end.
One of those days came; and that day was today, as you two were lounging on the bed, with your arms wrapped around his neck and legs straddling his lap.
Sheepishly, you untangle your limbs from around his, and crawl to sit beside him, legs tucked up to your chest and arms wrapping themselves around your knees pitifully if it wasn't for the fire in your eyes.
"...Nikto."
Nikto's back straightens at the speed of light at your tone of voice.
...Oh. Oh God.
This is it, he thinks. This is the day where everything ends. Eventhough you're his everything and that without you he'll be nothing, you're going to tell him to go, to get off you, because you've realised that he isn't worthy of your time or your company. Or maybe you've discovered his obsession â you â and the shrine he keeps of your stolen "lost" possessions and prays to it as if by an altar, how he would worship the ground you work on if it wasn't so conspicuous, how you're the only reason he hasn't given up and put a bullet straight through his own skull so the voices shut up once and for all andâ
"Do... you even like me?"
...What.
What.
What?!
Like you? Are you serious?!
He doesn't like you! He couldn't ever like you!
He adores you! Loves you! Worships you! But even then, no synonyms of these words would sufficiently convey his adoration, his unconditional love, his devotion. Would kneeling by your knees and ripping his beating heart out be enough? It still wouldn't. So he won't... mostly for your sake.
Struck dumb, dumbfounded, and utterly confused, he stares at you, his bloodshot steel blue eyes unblinking. Since he can see how your eyes are glistening, he's willing tears on your behalf, just so tears don't stain that pretty face.
Eventually, he says with complete certainty: "...Like would be putting it lightly."
"Then..."
You sniff, and Nikto flinches, but he otherwise remains stiff, not wanting to touch you and make your state worse.
"...then why won't you touch me? Don't you... find me attractive?"
Instantly, he states: "Because the touch of our hands would insult your body."
"You've... you've got to be fucking joking."
"No."
"Is... i-is this someâ some kind of fucking joke?"
"...No."
Sadness dissipating, it transforms into incredulity, until you almost laugh. This is unbelievable. It would be endearing if it wasn't so fucking frustrating. You don't know if you want to punch him or kiss him.
"Nikto. Nikto Nikto Nikto. For crying out loud â I WANT you to touch me."
"We're⊠I'm fucked up. You should have... better."
"Haven't you ever considered that I like my man fucked up?"
Oh God.
Man. Not men. Man.
âYou... still should have better.â
You snort in amusement. "What, someone more fucked up than you?"
You roll your eyes, almost out of boredom, but you don't miss how his fists clench, blood boiling as he's silently seething at the mere idea of someone else stealing you. Having you.
âBetter is not an option. From my eyes, you're the best man for me out there.â
A wheeze leaves his broken vocal cords â a poor imitation of a human laugh.
But it wasn't a laugh. He isn't laughing. Miraculously, tears collect at the corners of his dehydrated eyes, and he thinks that he might cry.
His voice cracks as he asks uncertainly: â...Best?â
âThe very best," you affirm with a smile.
He must be dreaming. This is all a dream. It's everything that he's been dreaming about. Maybe he's dreaming right now, and he'll wake up in a cold bed. Alone.
âWell⊠maybe I am obsessed with you."
"Maybe?"
"...I am obsessed with you."
"Okay."
"Maybe... we're so possessive that we'll never let you go. Never."
"Never?"
"Never."
âWell,â you begin, clucking your tongue, as if chastising him with the "tsk". âMaybe I like that. Maybe I like being wanted like that.â
"...You won't."
"I do. Otherwise, I wouldn't have even entertained the idea of being around you. If I was a rational person, I'd have ran for the hills. But? I'm not."
"..."
"Now touch me already," you say, unceremoniously snatching his idle hands and guiding them onto your body. "I'm yours. Don't wait for permission like some fucking dog."
You don't have to tell him twice.
"Yes."
ââââââââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
*imma b real w u guys, i had no fucking idea what to name this: ...Oblivious Nikto? ...Ignorant Nikto? ...Delusional Nikto? ...Unaware Nikto?... eventually I settled with "dense", tho i STILL don't know if that's suitable?????
Anyways... sorry for the sort of misleading title??? It was not intentional đ„Č. The only reason that it's addressed at the beginning is because I didn't want any misconceptions about what I think of Nikto. No, he is not oblivious, as I gone above and beyond to clarify at the start. đ
A/N:
To đȘŒ anon sending me the asks: I love you. And I love you. Did I mention that I love you? Because I love you. đ«đâšđâšđ§Ąđ§Ąđ«đâšđâšđ§Ąđ§Ąđ§Ąđâšđâšđđ§Ąđ§Ąâšâšâš (im the monster under your bed, but instead of scaring you, i hold your hand at night đ... I LOVE UUU/!!!!!!!! đ§Ąđ§Ąđ§Ąđâšâšâšđ«đđ§Ąđ§Ąđ«âšđ« DONT THINK THAT I DONT SEE YOU đżđżđż!!!! ggRRGRHGKG FROM NOW ON ALL OF MY NIKTO WORKS ARE A PERSONAL TRIBUTE TO U IDONT EVEN CARE ANYMORE)
Random notes:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO NIKTO, THE UGLY UGLY UGLY MOTHERFUCKER!!!! đđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđđ (yes his bd is tomorrow but i dont CARE!!!!!!)
Nikto and I are both Libras... đł OMgogmgomg we are DESTINED to be together!!! đ«Łđ«Łđ«đŠđŠđŠđŠđ§đ1!1!1!1!!!!! GUys IT WAS FATE! 1!1!1!!!!1!!!!!!!! /j
Ok but /srs, got the Ghostrunner 2 Endless Moto DLC for my birthday and ive never been happier omg đ„č (going to replay the whole game all over again lmao đ)
Lastly? Um. I love you all!!! Thanks for 750+ followers???+@?! When did THAT happen? @?!@??????!?? đđđđ«đ«đ«đ« THANK YOUUU đ«¶đ«¶đ«¶đ«¶đđđđ
#aking10592_ âćœĄ#Nikto x Female Reader#nikto x female reader#Nikto x Reader#nikto x reader#nikto x you#Nikto x You#Nikto#nikto#Nikto COD#nikto cod#COD Nikto#cod nikto#Nikto Call of Duty#nikto call of duty#Call of Duty Nikto#call of duty nikto#Nikto Headcanons#nikto headcanons#Call of Duty#Call of duty#Call of Duty Headcanons#call of duty headcanons#cod headcanons#cod hcs#Cod x Reader#cod x reader#Cod x You#cod x you
222 notes
·
View notes
Text
the blueprint - cl16
pairing: architect!charles leclerc x coworker!reader (fem) summary: in which you and your co-worker can't help but constantly butt-heads on projects warnings: 18+! SMUT! (obvi), kinda mean!Charles, squirting, language, some French (badly translated prob) word count: 4.1k author's note: hi I absolutely LOVED writing this. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do. i didnât proofread so if thereâs any typos please let me know!!! xoxo!! please let me hear your thoughts!!!! donât be shy
⊠. ăâș ă . ⊠. ăâș ă . ⊠. âș ă . ⊠. ăâș ă . ⊠. ăâș ă . âŠ
YOU COULDâVE SWORN youâve never been so irritated in your life.Â
âCanât you just, I donât know, ferme ta guele for once!â Shut the fuck up. You stood in the door of Charlesâs office, a crescendo of emotion echoed in your voice, almost reaching a fervent shout. Your face, now tinged with a reddish hue, reflected just how frustrated you were.Â
For a little over a year, both you and Charles had been integral parts of the same company. You, an interior designer, who occasionally delved into architecture every blue moon for fun. You never got the degree for architecture, but you loved to sketch building ideas from time to time just for fun. And then thereâs him, an architect, with a stick too far up his ass sometimes.
Anger painted Charlesâs demeanor, evident from the subtle reddening in his ears and the clench of his jaw. With matching frustration, he strolled behind his desk, easing into his chair. His green eyes narrowed at you, a silent yet potent communication.
âMoi?â Me? His tone was incredulous at he pointed his own fingertips at him, tapping them directly into his sweater covered chest. âPorquoi tu ne le fais pas?â Why donât you? His voice dropped lower at the end of his sentence, while he directed his fingers to now point at you.Â
You took a step further into his office, not bothering to shut the door behind you. âTu es incroyable!â Youâre unbelievable! The sarcasm dripped off your tongue as you ran a hand through your hair, your chest slightly heaving up and down.Â
To which, Charles only smirked at, ignoring your sarcasm, and responded with a cocky âJâai beaucoup entende cela.â Iâve heard that a lot.Â
The memory of the initial cause of the argument had become hazy but it was likely that it stemmed from the inherent clash that seemed inevitable whenever the two of you worked together on a project. The two of you were constantly perplexed by the companyâs decision to consistently pair you two together, especially because it was not a secret that you didnât get along. However, the undeniable reason might be rooted in the remarkable success followed. Almost every building, house, or structure designed by the both of you stood out as some of the companyâs best creations.
Charles couldnât help but trace his eyes along every crevice of your face while you ranted on. He honestly wasnât even listening as you bitched on about something you claimed he did. Instead, he was too enraptured with the way your cheeks reddened, the way your eyes narrowed at him, and the way your breasts moved with every exclamation you made. Because really, he is still a man after all and the tight button up shirt you wore was almost sinister. Like seriously, he couldâve sworn the buttons were about to pop open with each breath you took.
âMon dieu! Even now, youâre still not listening!â You noticed the distant look in Charlesâs eyes as he leaned back into his chair. It was like he was looking at you, but not at you.Â
You snapped your fingers repeatedly, leaning over the desk, your breasts even more in Charlesâs face now. He swore it took everything in him to look at your face, and not your perky breasts dangling in front of him.
âWhat?â
You stormed out of his office immediately with a loud groan. You didnât see him for the rest of the day.
-
âMamma mia,â Oh my god. Charles exclaimed to no one except himself as he stood tall, his hands tapping the sides of the heavy machine before him. It felt like an eternity, although it had only been about 5 minutes. The matter at hand was perfecting the model of his latest project, but the 3-D printer seemed to be malfunctioning.Â
Taking a step back, he began to stare at the machine as if it were his enemy, one hand rested on his hip. A million thoughts ran through his mind as to what could possibly be wrong with the machine. No matter how many times he tried, the layers seemed to be separating far too much, deeming each piece of his model printed earlier as garbage.
The fragrance of sandalwood, laced with a subtle sweetness of vanilla, announced your presence before he could even lay eyes on you. The warm and captivating scent enveloped him, much like it always did. He squeezed the bridge of his nose between his thumb and pointer finger in annoyance that he knew it was you without even having to turn around. Without turning his head, he spoke up, catching your attention abruptly.
âSais-tu comment rĂ©parer cela?â Do you know how to fix this?
It was one of the rare occasions when he addressed you without any trace of hatred in his words.  Your mouth hung slack in surprise, and you almost felt the need to rub your eyes in disbelief at the fact there was no back-handed comment involved.
For a few moments, you just stared at the back of his head. Unable to understand why he was even asking for your help in the first place. When he got impatient of waiting for a response, he spun his body around, his eyebrows slightly furrowed, and eyes pointed at you.Â
âHm?â Snapping out of your surprise, you urged him to continue, seeking clarification on what he was referring to. Charles couldnât help but take note of the tight black jumpsuit that you wore, a black and gold belt cinched at your waist. He felt his heart pound in his chest just a little bit more than normal at the accentuation of your curves as you stepped in front of him, acknowledging the curve of your ass before him.
âIt, uh..â He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, his Adamâs apple bobbing as he swallowed away his thoughts of your ass. You turned to look at him, waiting for him to finish his words. His cheeks slightly tinted pink as he offers a sheepish smile to you, âit keeps separating the layers too much.â
You nodded your head slowly, âJe dĂ©teste quand ça fait ça.â I hate when it does that. You quietly agreed with him, before playing with some of the buttons on the machine. Without any luck of fixing it on your own, your eyes lit up like a light bulb as you remembered Josh, one of your other co-workers, solved this issue before.
âLet me get Josh!â You uttered the name with such excitement that Charles felt an involuntary growl building within him. Josh, a fellow architect at the firm, seemed uncomfortably close to you for Charlesâs liking. Not that he cared or anything, but few things irked him more than witnessing you and Josh together in the office like two peas in a pod. The way Josh shamelessly flirted with you constantly only added to his irritation. Not that he liked you or anything, but that didnât mean he hasnât thought about shoving you face down over his desk and stuffing you full of his cock. Or that he hasnât thought of you pressed against the windows of his office, your bare chest against the glass as he slips his cock into your wet folds. Or that he hasnât thought about shoving his cock so deep into your throat just to get you to be quiet sometimes.Â
It was like the flip of a switch, Charlesâs irritation pouring out of him, as he spontaneously stomped away from the printing room. Trudging back to his office, leaving you behind in confusion. The last thing he wanted to see was you and Josh fixing something for him.
-
âSheâs such a fucking know it all,â Charles groans to a group of his co-workers, bringing the neck of the beer bottle to his lips before taking a swig. His eyes have been following your every move since you stepped foot in the banquet hall tonight.
 It was the 42nd annual office party, which may sound boring at first, but it always ends up with some chaotic story. Last year it was Jane, one of the executive assistants, who got way too drunk she vomited right by the CEOâs feet. The year before that it was Nick, a man who is part of the custodial staff, who went almost too crazy on the dance floor that he knocked a handful of people down and resulted in multiple broken glasses around the place. All in all, the office party is usually the opposite of a bore.
And tonight, Charles decides that itâs definitely not a bore when he spots your outfit for the night. Charles doesnât miss the curve of your ass as your back faces him, or the fact that Joshâs hand rests lightly against the small of your back either.
Youâre dressed to kill tonight. A long silky black gown rests tightly against your skin, aside from the bottom that fans out much like a mermaid tail. The neckline wraps around your neck much like a scarf, a long tail of it falling at your side.Â
Charles was so focused on Joshâs hand on you, that he didnât even hear his co-workers speaking to him until they shoved his shoulder lightly.
âDude, do you like her or something?â
âOr something.â Charles said with such disgust and hatred laced in his voice. âI donât know why I always have to get paired with her.â He finished his beer in a hasty speed as you head towards the bar, excusing himself from his friends as he made his way to the same area.
The grip he had on the neck of the empty bottle was so tight, it was close to breaking in the palm of his hand. He leans against the bar, staring straight ahead as he waits for the bartender to acknowledge him.
âWhatâs got you all wound up?â Sandalwood and Vanilla.
He turns his head, to you and a smiling Josh at your side. He wants to roll his eyes almost immediately. What he would give to be able to punch him right in the face for even being able to touch you. He doesnât bother to respond to you, turning his head back to the bar.
Heâs sick in the head, honestly. He knows he approached the bar only to be closer to you but then ignores you as soon as youâre near. To get some glimpse of you. To smell you. To hear your voice.Â
You hate the rejection. No matter how much he grinds your gears, you always try to be polite. You donât want to argue with him. Itâs honestly exhausting to stay arguing with him almost every day. On your first day of work, you actually thought you could be friends, until he opened his mouth and rudely dismissed you. It only made you work harder.
Charles got his drink and made his way back to his group of âfriendsâ. He didnât look at you the rest of the night.
At least until you both crossed paths outside the venue. Josh had left earlier in the night due to not feeling well, leaving you alone, with no jacket, as you tried to call for a ride home.Â
Charlesâs hands were shoved in the pockets of his dress pants as he approached you, awaiting for the valet to pull his car around. âWhere is your jacket?â He questioned, simply curious.
âWhy do you care?â You remarked back, a hint of annoyance in your voice. âYou ignored me earlier and now you want to talk to me?âÂ
Charles felt his patience wearing thin, especially at the sight of the goosebumps all over your skin and the chatter of your teeth between each word you spoke. Your nipples were rock hard, something that didnât go unnoticed by Charles. He felt the blood rush to his cock as his eyes quickly glanced at them.Â
He rolled his eyes before shoving his suit jacket off and tossing it over your shoulders. âCanât have my partner getting sick.â He began, âThe project is due too soon for you to call out.â He pulled the excuse out of his ass. Because really, how was he supposed to say that he cared? That he cared about the woman heâs an absolute dick too.
You wanted to argue, he could see the detest in your eyes, but you snuggled into the jacket anyways. Appreciating his gesture and the warmth of the jacket.
The valet pulled his car up, opening the door for Charles, to which Charles handed him a crisp bill for fetching the car for him. You stood on the sidewalk, Charlesâs jacket swallowing your body whole, a small breeze blowing the front pieces of your hair off your face. You looked beautiful, and Charlesâs knew it was a complete lie if he said other.
âGet in,â He motioned the passenger door open, not bothering to wait for your response before he grasped your small forearm and ushering you into the seat. The car smelt just like him. A smell you wanted to bury yourself in, regardless how annoying he was.
Charles wove through the streets at a leisurely pace, one hand on the wheel and the other resting on his knee. The radio volume was low, playing a song you couldnât remember the name of, as you stared out the window and directed Charles to your home.
He wanted to argue that he knows where it is. That heâs already been there before because one time he went to check on you because you didnât show up to work without calling in (which was very abnormal). That itâs the building right next to his. But he doesnât say it and just lets you direct him anyways, just so he can hear your voice a little more. He was greedy when it came to you.
Within a few minutes, he pulled in front of your building, placing the car in park and unbuckling his seat belt. You sat silently after unbuckling your own seatbelt, trying to decipher his mood. You never knew what mood you were going to get, but most of the time it was annoyance and anger.
You turned to look at him and your eyes instantly met with his, as he was already looking at you. âMerci.â Your words were soft as you spoke, reaching for the door handle, he stopped you.
âYou should dress warmer,â His lips lifted into a small grin, âItâs too cold and I canât handle this project without you.â
Although it was work related, it was probably the closest compliment youâve ever received from him. If you wanted to count it as a compliment. You felt your cheeks turn pink at his confession. Who are you? You donât blush at Charles Leclerc. The architect with a stick up his ass. The guy who grates your every nerve. The guy who is undeniably hot and smells so good, you think about it more often than you want to admit.
âIâll remember that.â Your hand goes to reach for the car door handle, but he stops you. His muscular arm stretches across your lap, grabbing the door and holding it in place from opening. Heâs now practically stretched across the small space of the car, his scent enveloping you, the warmth of his body heating you right up. A small smirk formed on Charles lips as he noticed how flustered you were getting towards his proximity.
âAre you and Josh dating?â It was a simple question, but the words felt like acid on his tongue. You couldnât help but notice the displeased look on his face as he straightens his body, providing more space between the two of you.
Your eyes widened in shock before muttering a quick, âNo!â You coughed slightly, almost choking on your shock.Â
âBien.â Good.  Was all he said, before unlocking the doors, giving you the go ahead to get out of the car. It was when you were about three steps from the car door that he rolled down the window and said, âYou can return the jacket at work.â
-
Itâs today, that Charles decides he has had it up to here. If he must witness Joshâs fingers graze your skin one more time, he swears he will combust. So, to make himself feel some relief of his anger, he starts a fight with you. Naturally.
âItâs a shitty plan and even you know it!âÂ
Honestly, it is a shit plan. And Charles knows that itâs a shit one too, but he would never admit that to you. Not when he is this pent up over fucking Josh. Not when it gives him an excuse to spend more time with you.
Which is what led you into his office, the clock nearing midnight, as you both are sprawled (as much as you can be) around his desk. The current plans of the project are scattered everywhere and not one other person, beside the both of you, are within the offices floor.
Your hair had made its way into a clip, leaving your neck uncovered and exposed. Charlesâs found himself often staring at the nape of your neck when you werenât looking. His desire to litter marks all over it was growing with each second that he spent in your proximity. Sandalwood and Vanilla.
âIs there a reason youâre always so mean to me?â
The words caught him completely off guard as he lifted his pencil, leaning back in his chair to face you more. You looked beautiful, like always. He could feel the burn in his chest as the words left your lips.
He was silent for a moment. Contemplating if heâs supposed to tell you that heâs mean to you because he doesnât know how to act around you. That heâs mean to you because he wants to fuck you so badly, it consumes his every thought. That heâs mean to you because you are mean to him too.
âYouâre not innocent either,â He remarks. His eyes shifting back to the drawing in front of him. Honestly, the plans werenât looking much better but you both refused to give up.
You nodded your head slowly in agreement. You couldnât deny that sometimes you were snippier towards him for no reason. It probably had to do with the fact that almost every week since you met, youâve had to use your vibrator to the thought of him to ease the burn in your stomach just enough to get through the day.
You both didnât know what it was about each other. You got under each otherâs skin like no other.
And it wasnât until he brought his eyes back to you, green meeting yours, that he noticed the dilation in your pupils. He could no longer pretend that he didnât want you. It was killing him.
His hand grasps the back of your neck in a tight grip, asserting his dominance, as he pulls you into him. Your lips smashing into each other. He wasted no time before slipping his tongue directly into your mouth, moaning in the process as you let him in with such ease.
Your taut nipples poked through fabric of your bralette underneath the silk top you wore. Charles kept one hand on the back of your neck, pressing you into him, while the other slipped into the buttoned shirt, pinching your nipples between his thumb and forefinger.
He groaned hotly into your mouth as he grabbed a handful of your breast, something heâs always wanted to do.
You crawled your way into his lap, the short skirt riding up your waist as you straddled his lap in the desk chair. You grinded against his thigh, moaning into his mouth. He swallowed every moan you gave, his hands eventually sliding down to your hips and guiding your movement.
âYou drive me fucking crazy, chĂ©rie.â He spoke the words in between kisses, the sentence sounding broken as your tongue swirled around his.
âAre we really doing this?â You pulled away, unable to stop the motion of your hips as you stared at him. His hair was in complete disarray, lips swollen from kissing you so hard, and his eyes were half-shut like he was drunk off of your kisses.
He didnât respond with words. Instead, he places his hands onto the backside of your thighs and lifted you as he came to a stance, placing you directly on the edge of his desk before him.
You both were frantic, ripping off each otherâs clothes as fast as you could in between the wet, hot open-mouthed kisses. It wasnât long before you were almost completely nude, aside from the mini skirt bunched above your waist, and sprawled along his desk with his hard cock stretching the velvet walls of your pussy with a delicious burn. His thumb pressed tiny but firm circles on your swollen clit, leaving you delusional on his desk.
His lips trailed all over your body. They moved from the spot right below your ear, to the underside of your jaw, up to the corner of your mouth.
âFeel so fucking good, chĂ©rie.â He groaned. His hips moving at a fervent pace, you donât think you would last much longer, especially with his hot words whispered into the shell of your ear.
He pulled away from you for a moment, just to stare at how fucked you were. Your hair was no longer in a clip, seeing as he pulled it out of your hair and tossed it across his office just mere minutes ago. Your cheeks and chest were flushed, and the bounce of your tits almost had him cumming on the spot.
âIâve wanted this for so long,â He confesses. The words jumbling off his lips as he ruts against you, the large wooden desk pushing forward with each powerful thrust of his hips into you. The office walls echoed your moans, you were practically screaming in pleasure for the entire world to hear.
You nodded your head repeatedly, unable to form the words, too drunk off the feeling of his cock pressing against the very spot that ached the most for him. Because you too, wanted this for so long.
âYeah?â He smugly asks. âYou wanted this too?â He slows his hips down, but it doesnât lessen the effect of just how good his cock feels against you. Your walls are clamped around him tightly, not wanting to let him go.
âMhm,â you groaned. âNeeded this so badâŠ.needed youâ You words were almost incoherent as he spits directly onto your clit, his thumb now speeding up the little circles heâs been doing all this time.
He had to pinch his eyes shut at the confession, almost sending him to release his cum right into you. âMon dieu,â His voice grumbles, reverberating in his chest as he leans over your body on the desk, trailing his tongue and sucking on your nipple.
âIâm gonna,â you begin. âfuck, fuck,â It takes a few seconds of Charles sucking on your nipple before the burn deep in your stomach completely takes over, sending your legs spasming around his waist. Your orgasm was explosive and wet. You donât think youâve ever experienced this before as you squeeze around Charlesâs cock so tightly, he feels like he can barely move his cock.Â
âFucking, mmm,â He can barely get full sentences out as you squirt all over his cock and onto the papers of his desk. âThatâs a good girl,â He stands up tall, watching you thrash around on his desk, and the now soaked plans beneath your body.
âDoing so good for me.â
âFeels so fucking goodâ
âSo fucking beautifulâ
âDoes my cock feel as good as you feel to me?âÂ
With a few more mumbled phrases spewing out of Charlesâs lips, his own orgasm hits him, as he pulls out quickly, his hot cum landing directly across your stomach in a gooey string.
You both were panting, unable to form words as he collapses his chest down onto you. The ability to stand lost on him as his pants rest at his ankles. Your chests move in sync as you catch your breaths, Charlesâs cum pressed to both of your skin.
âLooks like we need to re-do the plans again.â Charles jokes which quickly earns a soft chuckle from your lips in response.
#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc smut#charles leclerc#f1 x reader#f1 imagines#charles leclerc angst#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc fic#f1 imagine#f1 x female reader#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 one shot#f1 fanfiction#cl16 x you#cl16 x reader#cl16 imagine
703 notes
·
View notes
Text
slow motion
pairing: oscar piastri x fem!reader
word count: 1.3k
warnings: smut (wrap it before you tap it), cussing, fluff, i think thatâs it
authors note: itâs been a min so i need to get something out to you guys!! hope itâs not bad and ignore any typos! ALSO SO PROUD OF OSCAR!!! HE DESERVED THATS WIN!! LOVE HIM SM!! any feedback is appreciated and please like, comment, and reblog!! hope you enjoy!!
wanna be tagged in my works?! CLICK HERE!
f1 masterlist 1k celebration
âWhat the fuck, why would they do that?!â
The frustration coursed through you as McLarenâs decision to box Lando first flashed across the screen. Oscar was leading the race, on the brink of his first victory, and yet they chose to pit Lando first. It didnât make any sense. Every nerve in your body was on edge as you watched the race unfold. The radio messages about switching positions were maddening. It felt like McLaren was orchestrating the race rather than letting it happen naturally.
Finally, when the order came for Lando to let Oscar through, you felt a mixture of relief and lingering irritation. This was Oscarâs moment, his hard-fought victory, but the teamâs strategy had cast a shadow over it, making it seem as if it was a gift rather than something he had earned.
When it was time for the podium celebration, your heart swelled with pride. Watching Oscar spray the champagne, his face illuminated with joy, was everything you had dreamed of. The crowdâs cheers echoed in your ears, and you could hardly contain your excitement. He had done it. He had won his first F1 race, and you were bursting with happiness for him.
After the celebrations, you and Oscar are on the way to the hotel. "McLaren needs to get their stuff together," you told him, shaking your head. "They almost ruined it with their strategy. But you, babe, you were amazing out there. You earned that victory."
Oscar smiled, a tired but satisfied look on his face. "Thank you. I can't wait to go home and sleep."
You shook your head playfully. "Oh no, we have dinner tonight. We're celebrating, sorry not sorry."
He groaned, half-jokingly. "Can't we just stay in?"
"Absolutely not," you insisted, laughing. "We're going to have a nice dinner, drink, dance, and celebrate your victory properly."
The dinner party was a nice turnout. Friends and fellow racers gathered around, the atmosphere buzzing with excitement and congratulations. You and Oscar mingled, shared drinks, and danced, reveling in the celebratory mood. Laughter and cheers filled the air, making the night unforgettable.
On the way to the hotel in the car, you couldnât keep your hands off Oscar. The excitment from the victory was still coursing through both of you, and your desire for him was at an all-time high. You leaned in, kissing his neck softly at first, then more urgently, as your hands roamed over his chest. He tilted his head back, giving you better access as you whispered dirty words into his ear, your breath hot against his skin.
"You're so amazing, Oscar," you murmured, your voice low and seductive. "I can't wait to get you back to the hotel."
He groaned softly, his eyes darkening with desire. "You're driving me crazy, Y/N."
"Sit on the bed," you instructed him, a mischievous glint in your eye.
As soon as you reached the hotel room, you pushed him inside, locking the door behind you. "Sit on the bed," you instructed, your voice commanding yet playful.
Oscar obeyed, his gaze never leaving yours. You slowly began to undress, swaying your hips seductively as you removed each piece of clothing. His eyes followed every movement, his breath hitching as you revealed more of your skin.
Clad only in your lingerie, you straddled his lap, feeling his arousal pressing against you. You ground your hips against him, eliciting a deep moan from his lips. Your hands roamed over his chest, teasing and caressing as you kissed him deeply, your tongue exploring his mouth.
He reached out to touch you, but you pushed his hands away playfully. "Not yet," you teased, moving his hands to his sides as you continued to dance for him. You could feel his arousal growing beneath you, adding to the heat between you.
Finally, you couldn't take it any longer. You pushed him onto the bed and climbed over him, your hands deftly unzipping his pants. You kissed his neck, nibbling on his skin as your hands roamed his body, teasing and tantalizing.
You pushed him back onto the bed, crawling over him with a mischievous glint in your eye. Your fingers deftly unzipped his pants, freeing his erection. You kissed down his chest, trailing your lips lower and lower until you reached his hard length. You took him into your mouth, your tongue swirling around the tip before taking him deeper, your hand stroking what your mouth couldn't reach.
Oscar's hands tangled in your hair, guiding your movements as he groaned with pleasure. "Fuck baby, that feels so good," he breathed, his voice husky with desire.
You slowly sucked his cock, taking your time to pleasure him until he was teetering on the edge. Then, you pulled back kissing his tip, climbing back up to straddle his hips. You guided him inside you, both of you gasping at the sensation. You moved slowly at first, savoring the feeling of him filling you completely. Then, you began to ride him harder, your movements becoming more urgent as the pleasure built between you.
Oscar's hands gripped your hips firmly, his fingers digging into your skin as he helped guide your movements. You rode him slowly at first, savoring the feeling of him filling you completely. The room was filled with the sounds of your heavy breathing, your moans mingling with the rhythmic slap of skin against skin. Every movement sent waves of pleasure coursing through your body.
You leaned down to kiss him, your lips meeting his in a passionate embrace. Your tongues danced together, the kiss deepening as your bodies moved in perfect harmony. You felt his muscles tense beneath you, his breath hot against your mouth as he groaned with pleasure.
"God, you feel so good," he murmured against your lips, his voice thick with desire. His hands roamed up your back, pulling you closer as you continued to move together.
You began to ride him harder, your hips moving with increasing urgency. The friction between your bodies was intoxicating, each thrust bringing you closer to the edge. Oscar's hands moved to your breasts, his thumbs brushing over your hardened nipples, sending jolts of pleasure straight to your core.
Just when you thought you couldn't take any more, Oscar suddenly flipped you onto your back, taking control. He thrust into you with a new intensity, his movements faster and harder than before. The change in angle sent shockwaves of pleasure through your body, making you cry out his name.
He leaned down, capturing your lips in a fierce kiss as he drove into you. "You're mine," he growled against your mouth, his voice raw with passion. "Every inch of you."
"Yes, Osc," you gasped, wrapping your legs around his waist, pulling him deeper. "I'm yours. Always."
His pace quickened, his hips slamming into yours with a relentless rhythm. The room was filled with the sounds of your moans and the wet, rhythmic slap of skin against skin. His name fell from your lips in a litany of pleasure as he brought you closer and closer to the brink.
"Come for me, Y/N," he commanded, his voice a low, sexy growl in your ear.
His words sent you over the edge. Your body tensed, a powerful orgasm ripping through you. You cried out, your nails digging into his back as you clung to him. Oscar followed soon after, his own release hitting him hard. He buried his face in your neck, groaning your name as he filled you with his warmth.
You lay there together, your bodies entwined, both of you breathing heavily as you came down from the high. Oscar gently brushed a strand of hair from your face, his eyes filled with love and satisfaction.
"I love you," he whispered, his voice tender.
"I love you too, baby," you replied, pulling him into a soft, lingering kiss.
⿠.° ⹠everything taglist ⹠°. ⿠: @ham1lton @ietss @animeandf1lover @nelly187 @heartsfromtaeyong @bloodyymaryyy @nor-4 @zacian117 @mel164 @uhhvictoria @hadidsworld @zabwlky1999 @sya-skies @lillysbigwilly @avengers-assemble123456 @santanasaintmendes @km-23mr @hookhausenschips @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @Ronpho @minekarina @formula1-motogpfa @slagclarens
⿠.° ⹠oscar taglist ⹠°. ⿠: @tellybearryyyy @exotic-iris13 @magixpracticality @eoduuung @eternoangel l @ihtscuddlesbeeetchx3 @flowerpetalk @oledoledoffen
© 23victoria 2023-24 I all rights reserved. do not republish, steal repost, modify, translate or claim my work as your own
#êšàż victoriaâs writings!! àżêš#oscar piastri#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri x fem!reader#op81#op81 x reader#op81 imagine#op81 fic#op81 fluff#op81 x you#op81 x y/n#op81 smut#formual one#formula 1 smau#formula 1#formula one#hungary gp 2024#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 one shot#f1 x you#lando norris#mclaren#f1 mclaren
751 notes
·
View notes
Note
please make a san version of the Average Stamina? Pretty please but a little longer and After her first squirt San makes her squirt over and over?
Fuck you empty
Pairing: bf!San x fem!reader
Word count: 1k
Warnings: pure smut, mdni, dom!San, sub!reader, fingering, oral(fem recieves), praisesâ, pet names(love, babe, baby, darling), multiple cumming, multiple squirting, overstimulation, pretty quick ending and after care |let me know if i forgot anything|
Average stamina
A/n: atinys are hella kinky tbh. lowkey proofreaded~ pls ignore all the typos etc and let yourself enjoy the filth
You could say you knew your boyfriend of three years almost better than anyone else. From all he was passionate about, to dancing, singing his heart out and to being the best boyfriend the world has ever seen.
But some stuff takes three years to learn about
......
"Cmon baby give me one more, I know you can do it" He exhaled the words, barely audible. Only aving you coming down from your high wasn't enough for him, like he could even have enough of your pretty little flushed orgasm face.
"Sannie- please! Ahhm" you struggle again his bruising grip holding onto your waist, pinning tou on the mattress of your shared bed. Your hands move down to his bigger ones, not sure if you were holding into him for support or trying to escape the unwanted pleasure he was giving you regardless.
He rubbed his thumb across your soft tummy to comfort, while his other arms was busy mercilessly thrusting three fingers in your already soaking hole.
"Oh? Yes my baby, you can give me more, I know you do. Cmon, make your Sannie proud" He loosened the grip on your waist to let you hold his hand, before holding it tightly again. Not trusting your hips to stay put on its own.
Instead he moved his hand toward your lower belly, low enough for his thumb to now be resting on your puffy clit, rubbing circles on it to help you get closer, as if you werent already bursting wirh the pleasure.
"Feels good nah darling? You feel it too? The burning feeling right here in your little belly?" He pressed the same thumb onto your lower belly making you scream in pain, lifting your legs up uncontrollably, arching your back as far as you could.
Fuck his and his stupid thumb.
That's what you thought. But not exactly what you whimpered.
"Sannie- so close please- more-ah"
"Oh? Thought you wanted me to stop? Make your mind love" he said not hiding the smirk in his voice as moved his hands even faster if it even was possible. You could feel your legs shaking around his body as you kept on arching your back toward him, you body moving itself towards him, as if it knows your desires better.
"Sannie- cumming cumming, it's-cumming-" He moved his hands to a new angle, hitting were you thought he should've have, because the moment he did, you felt the wave of euphoria wash over your soul as if you could feel anything no more. As if your body went numb, you let go of everything except for your lifely grip of his hand.
"God damn my baby, you made a mess" you said taking his fingers out of your now freaking dripoing cunt. After not hearing any answers, he pulled his hand holding you, towards him, making your head face him, looking at his now wet lower body, mixed with his own pre cum, on his now angey red cock.
"You see this love? You did this, all this with thay pretty cunt of yours" he let go of your head, letting you crawl in a corner.
"We are you going babe? Are you gonna be so cruel to this pretty pussy? Look at it, it's yearning for more" He let his index and middle finger wrap themselves around sensetive clit, squizing it the slightest just to get your attention back to him.
"Hmm love? I can feel like beating for more, it starts to drip again, is it because of my words? Or because of my fingers working on you?" He kept his movement, frustratingly slowly.
"Sannie- can't do more-tired" you muttered, hips already shaking at his movement, trying to fine a way to escape.
"Oh baby, that's why I take charge here, yo can't make the right decisions after a few orgasm, tsk" He chuckled before continuing-
"You still have alot to give me my darling, I'm just trying to help you" He re-angled his hands, now having all fingers on your bare pussy, moving harshly to the sides, caging you legs with his much stronger ones.
You cried out his name multiple times before feeling the liquid dripping harshly out of your hole.
"Hmm, not quite there now are we love?" It was a theoretical question. No answer needed. He gave your over sensetive clit and few more rubs, as if he was enjoying this more than he's supposed to be. Maybe he does.
He moved his fingers, lower towards you hole, pushing in two fingers scissors you open, only for more than your cum to drip out.
"oh baby, your body if calling for me, gonna fuck you empty" he muttered to himself. He lifted your hips higher, placing it on a pillow nearby. Having fully acces to your little cunt. He moved his mouth to your clit, sucking in it with his whole mouth, while his fingers begun to play with your walls.
"Cmon baby, squirt it all on my face, let ir go and you'll feel better. I know best" He voice was muffled and so were your ears with the sound of your heart beating louder than ever. Everything felt so great and painful at the same time. You wanted it to stop and never end. Your brain told you that you couldn't take more while your body went limb in san's hold, trusting with your whole being.
"sannie, cumming" that was all you could say before abutting your mouth again, rubbing your cunt towards his handsome face.
"Cum baby, be a good girl" you let you eye lids close as you felt ridiculously empty, as if you were even lighter.
Suddenly you whined in pain as you saw your boyfriend slowly and so gently letting your sore legs now on the soft bit drenched mattress.
"Now that felt better, didn't it? He said winking right after. Running a hand on your body, giving a fast massage before he grabbing his t-shirt from the ground to clean both you and him.
" I think we'll need abit more wash clothes than this one" He joked, still having enough energy to move around with his naked butt.
"But no worries, I got us both"! He said showing you his dimples as if he didn't take the soul out of you.
Ateez masterlist
#ateez smut#ateez reaction#ateez scenarios#ateez san#ateez x reader#ateez fanfic#ateez imagines#choi san#san smut#ateez san smut#choi san smut
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
tired of seeing postcanon benry turn human and good. make gordon a monster but also good. or a human but also bad. and let benry get a little mixed up too. put them in eachothers places and entirely understand eachother, and utilise that understanding as more fuel to the fire of their mutual hatred. please
(read the tags please they have important things too)
hey can there be more content of gordon being a morally grey character. like yes i love it when hes a cool dad and great person and All Of That. but i feel like some of us didnt watch the same videos? that guy killed so many people and shot his friends so many times etc etc etc. he is Not a good person and i love him like that. if we were to take the whole 'it wasnt a videogame and these characters have a life beyond them and live in a world with morals' view of it all that is. gordon in canon it was a videogame world is a bit more complicated but i still love him like that.
#hlvrai#hlvrai gordon#hlvrai benry#vague frenry but i wont clog the tag#sorry yes i do like frenry. theyre too interesting#character analysis#important to mention the whole thing that qhazomb talk about alot. with the whole benry should stay a monster n stuff. i love that and#i think gordon should be added to that equation#look at gordon and tell me that guy doesnt have some kind of mental breakdown about his morals postcanon#on technicality#benry is more âmorally correctâ that gordon (TAKE THIS WITH A GRAIN OF SALT. PLEASE.)#and i think thatd fuck gordon yp because hes got that internalised idea of âmonster/different = badâ#but hed go âoh fuck. im different too. i am bad too. but i am also human and ok and none this makes any more senseâ#sorry i need to see him have a breakdown about the things that killed me when i was 7#difference â bad person and i want to see gordon feetman get all existantial crisis about it.#this whole idea has a lot more to explain than what i can on tumblr. sorry#also ignore the typos please
49 notes
·
View notes