#of course its siken it always is lmao

[fireproof-art]

“Actually, you said Love, for you, is larger than the usual romantic love. It’s like a religion. It’s terrifying. No one will ever want to sleep with you.”

[callmearcturus]

Is PT AU titled after a song or something specific? Or is it something you and Punct came up with?

we came up with it, it went through a few iterations of wording, but we workshopped until we liked it

hang on i found the brainstorming we did in a planning doc

I actually have a huge doc of titles in search of a story, it was given to me as a gift like literally 10 years ago, and i always skim through it when its time to title something in case there's something good in there

as you can see from the screenshot*, we thought really hard about Richard Siken's original version of Love Letter For The Square Root Of Minus One. big inspiration.

MORE THAN ONCE IN WRITING THIS SO FAR, THIS EXACT CONVO HAS HAPPENED

Punct: working on the doc, I really like this bit here Arc: oh, the siken reference? Punct, sighing: gdi of course its a siken reference

in the same way hideo kojima is 70% movies, i am 70% siken references

*note this is a joke, the original version of that poem is hard to find and kinda obscure lmao i VASTLY prefer it to the one he published in War of the Foxes tho, sorry richard

[amortm]

      *  𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓'𝐒  𝐔𝐏  ,  pretty  kitties  !   i'm  terribly  sorry  abt  my  absence  on  the  dash  alongside  you  angels  ,  &  trust  that  i’m  fully  embarrassed  of  my  slow  ass  ,  but  i  finally  typed  this  baby  out  ,  &  i  can’t  wait  for  y’all  to  meet  my  love  ,  𝒋𝒖𝒍𝒆𝒔  !

*  ╰   it’s  an  absolute  dishonour  to  meet  you ,   julianna  /  jules  .  at   twenty - one  ,  you’ve  disgraced  the   peralta   family  name  &  failed  to  carry  on  their  legacy  as  an  elite  .  as  a  result  ,  they’ve  requested  that  we  at  the  academy  do  our  best  to  rid  you  of  your  venality  ,  & seeing  as  though  they’re  worth  86m  ,  we  dutifully  obliged  .  while  your   pleonastic  &  inexorable  attributes  have  always  promised  failure  ,  it’s  your  spar  with   pride  &  ghosting  your  breakout  acting  role  after  you  found  out  your  daddy  secured  it  for  you   that  got  you  committed  .  before  we  take  possession  of  you  ,  it’s  imperative  that  we  know  that  you  are  a   cisfem  who  prefers   she  &  her  pronouns  ,  &  you  resemble   diana  silvers  .  your  birthday  is  on   april  26th  ,  making  you  a  recalcitrant  taurus  ,  &  you  were  transported  to  us  all  the  way  from   vail  ,  co  .  at  the  present  time  ,  you  work  off  campus  at   seaside  florist  .  go  ahead  &  purchase  that  extra  large  suitcase  ,  disgrace  .  you’re  going  to  need  it . 

your  name  /  age  /  pronouns  /  timezone  /  etc  .

hiya  loves  !   i  go  by  blue  &  she  /  her  pronouns  ,   i’m  9teen  ,   &  i’m  a  pst  baby  !   i’m  one  of  the  six  lovely  admins  @  #unholy  ,   &  they’re  all  superstars  ,   so  imagine  my  daily  awe  !   anyway  ,   i’m  beyond  excited  to  finally  get  the  ball  rolling  ,   &  share  the  dash  with  you  babes  !

 muse  inspo  .

noora  sætre  ,   the  goldfinch  ,   ella  of  frell  ,   neil  perry  ,   charlie  dalton  ,   claire  saffitz  ,   monica  geller  ,   carla  lalli  music  ,   mia  thermopolis  ,   adam  parrish  ,   blue  sargent  ,   anna  ou  !

 character  details  :

    💐 :   sweetly  judgmental  ,  adoringly  vindictive   /   vindictively  adoring  ,   witty  ‘n  gritty  ,   bitingly  tender  ,   expressively  stubborn  ,   softly  feral  !

    😈 :   hershey’s  chocolate  ,   brooklyn  pizza  ,   baguettes  ,   collector  edition  copies  of  wuthering  heights  ,   selfies  ,   her  mom  ,   richard  siken  anthologies  ,   twilight  (  #teamedward  )  ,   crowded  movie  theaters  ,   english  gardens  ,   the  air  in  new  york  ,   the  air  in  vail  ,   snowboarding  ,   her  hair  ,   hot  chocolate  (  no  whipped  cream  ,   half  a  bag  of  mini  marshmallows  dumped  atop  )  ,   andrew  garfield  ,   her  discover  weekly  playlist  ,   german  shepherds  ,   harry  potter  ,   lord  of  the  rings  ,   comedies  ,   horror  movies ,   nude  lipstick  ,   chocolate  chip  toffee  cookies  with  sea  salt  drizzled  on  top  ,   mamma  mia  franchise  ,   dissertations  ,   driving  ,   any  typa  jacket  /  coat  ,   being  the  big  spoon  ,   her  father  ,   coca  cola  ,   lilies  ,   disney  t - shirts  ,   her  father’s  films  ,   take  out  ,   farms  ,   italy  (  every  single  crevice  of  it  )  ,   the  plaza  hotel  ,   mint  chip  ice  cream  ,   hats  ,   trains ,   monthly  horoscopes  ,  ancient  history  ,   greenwich  village  ,   maggie  rogers  ,   mating  ritual  ,   vampire  weekend  ,   mitski  ,   the  wombats  ,   magic  bronson  ,   jade  bird  ,   hockey  ,   pretending  to  be  a  fairy / witch  /  mermaid  as  a  child  ,   naruto  ,   avatar  the  last  airbender  ,   stepping  over  state  /  country  lines  ,   hot  water  with  honey  ,   amazon  prime  !

    👿 :   the  marvel  franchise  except  for  the  captain  america  &  thor  trilogies  ,   coffee  &  tea  ,   shorts  ,   sweet  potatoes  ,   layovers  of  any  length  ,   socks  ,   soy  milk  ,   her  arms  ,   chihuahuas  ,   a  song  of  fire  &  ice  novels  ,   super  fudgy  /  rich  cake  &  brownies  ,   cooking  for  herself  ,   being  told  what  to  do  ,   being  wrong  &  having  everyone  know  it  ,   people  who  are  rude  to  employees  ,   bad  tipping  ,   margaret  atwood  ,   her  first  grade  teacher  ,   plastic  coke  bottles  ,   too  much  pepper  in  a  dish  !

 upbringing  &  family  life  ,  life  before  the  academy  ,  etc  .

     julianna  rachel  peralta  was  born  to  a  beauty  -  charmed  family  of  three  ,   with  a  new  yorker  mother  &  italian  father  birthing  the  healthiest  &  happiest  girl  parents  can  dream  for  .    her  mother  ,  susanna  ‘ susie ’  peters  ,   was  coined  the  model  that  pioneered  90′s  fashion  ,  a  la  kate  moss  ,   &  met  julianna’s  father  ,   elio  peralta   (  think  the  francis  ford  coppola  of  this  verse  )  ,   whilst  she  was  briefly  on  set  for  jack  to  see  friend  fran  drescher  .    their  love  stemmed  from  there  ,   after  she  made  a  mocking  comment  &  he  overhead  &  mocked  her  in  return  for  it  ,   &  the  whirlwind  romance  that  captivated  their  world  for  the  next  few  years  led  to  miss  jules  being  born  .    neither  of  her  parents  desired  marriage  from  each  other  ,   rather  believing  that  their  love  knew  no  bounds  ,   even  those  of  matrimony  ,   but  never  did  it  dim  the  bond  held  between  the  small  family  of  three  .    once  jules  was  in  their  arms  ,   they  relocated  from  new  york  to  colorado  ,   into  the  quaint  town  of  vail  ,   surrounded  by  pristine  mountains  &  crystalline  air  ,   where  susie  &  elio  found  a  pocket  of  indisputable  peace  after  a  small  winter  trip  in  their  first  year  of  romance  .

        it  was  there  that  jules  grew  up  ,   &  there  that  the  love  of  her  parents  faltered  .    her  mother  missed  the  world  of  fashion  ,   the  rhythms  &  rhymes  of  the  space  she  knew  as  well  as  in  maintaining  the  fame  that  spotlighted  her  so  ,   while  elio’s  passions  for  turning  out  film  after  film  dwindled  .    &  when  the  offer  from  vogue  came  in  ,   waxing  poetic  about  a  fresh  position  as  a  fashion  editor  ,   both  she  &  elio  knew  that  their  paths  would  veer  .    their  love  was  no  less  ,   but  integral  factors  of  their  relationship  were  now  fractured  ,   &  they  each  desired  after  different  things  .    this  was  all  said  to  julianna  ,   in  soft  tones  &  with  assuring  words  .    yet  ,   never  was  it  promised  that  everything  would  be  the  same  as  it  was  ,   for  the  truth  was  in  something  unsaid  .    susie  moved  to  new  york  ,   while  elio  &  jules  stayed  in  that  mansion  in  the  mountains  ,   &  all  was  as  fair  &  well  as  it  could  be  ,   with  julianna  staying  with  her  mom  during  the  fall  season  &  discovering  every  little  piece  of  italy  in  the  summers  .    christmases  &  hanukkahs  were  always  shared  in  vail  ,   &  susie  tagged  along  european  dives  when  her  schedule  allowed  for  it  .    it  was  as  if  their  relationship  &  subsequent  uncoupling  were  trivial  details  no  one  could  bother  to  account  for  ,  until  ,   in  the  worst  spot  she’s  ever  seen  her  mother  ,   it  came  out  that  elio  peralta  found  a  new  woman  to  share  a  life  with  ,   &  that  their  new  life  together  would  be  housed  in  the  same  home  that  susie  &  elio  specially  chose  &  ,   in  emotional  terms  ,  truly  built  themselves  &  carved  their  family  in  its  foundations  .    it  was  a  betrayal  of  the  deepest  caliber  ,   &  from  there  the  small  peace  that  still  was  at  the  core  of  their  little  family  was  forever  severed  ,   &  it  became  obvious  to  jules  that  those  few  years  were  lucky  .

     she  was  thirteen  when  famed  actress  lily  taylor  (  aka  jennifer  connely  lmao  )  moved  into  her  family  home  ,   bringing  her  adopted  eleven - year - old  twins  with  her  .    in  a  sense  of  loyalty  to  her  mother  &  her  own  hurt  over  the  despair  that  her  father  caused  their  original  trio  ,   jules  was  heartily  &  positively  prepared  to  hate  the  new  additions  to  her  family  with  a  vindictive  fidelity  .    her  plan  was  promptly  overturned  ,   however  ,   when  she  spent  day  upon  day  with  her  new  fam  &  steadily  allowed  them  into  her  heart  .    this  ,   of  course  ,   was  paired  with  doubtless  guilt  ,   spurred  on  by  her  own  mind  whenever  she  flew  to  nyc  to  see  her  mother  ,   but  soon  enough  this  was  caught  by  each  of  her  parents  ,   &  susie  was  insistent  in  her  assurance  that  whatever  frigidness  she  still  held  for  elio  &  his  new  beau   (  which  julianna  didn’t  bother  to  correct  with  wife  )   ,   it  in  no  way  extends  nor  should  be  mimicked  by  her  .    elio  ,   in  turn  ,   was  quick  to  promise  to  jules  that  his  love  for  her  mother  flamed  in  his  heart  to  this  day  ,   but  each  of  them  are  happier  living  their  lives  in  the  lifestyles  they’ve  chosen  ,   with  the  people  they’ve  chosen  .    

      there  really  wasn’t  anything  to  do  but  swallow  their  words  ,   &  live  by  the  sentiments  they  expressed  .   jules  was  both  a  mama’s  &  daddy’s  girl  in  one  ,   so  to  take  their  words  as  fact  was  an  ignorance  she  allowed  herself  ,   even  when  the  hurt  look  on  her  mother’s  faced  inevitably  shone  through  in  hidden  moments  .

     but  when  jules  turned  seventeen  ,   susie  fell  in  love  with  a  musician  /  designer  named  tommy  lever  she  met  while  interviewing  his  collection  for  vogue  ,  &  the  two  fell  deep  ,  far  enough  to  sway  susie  into  moving  to  brazil  during  the  spring  season  ,  away  from  her  beloved  manhattan  loft  ,  to  be  with  him  in  his  home  (  the  link  is  crucial  to  his  characterization  lmao  ,  as  lenny  kravitz  is  essentially  tommy  lever  )  .   when  she  can  ,  jules  visits  as  often  as  she’s  allowed  (  always  )  &  has  gained  a  room  herself  .

      after  that  ,   however  ,   the  cycle  between  her  various  homes  continued  ,   well  into  her  slipping  teendom  ,   &  when  the  prospect  of  college  crunched  down  on  her  ,   the choice  seemed  inevitable  .   nyu  gained  a  classics  &  theater  major  for  its  class  of  2019  (  she  skipped  the  third  grade  ,  a  fact  she  didn’t  stop  bragging  about  at  that  age  )  ,   but  in  her  senior  year  of  university  ,   the  walls  came  crashing  down  .

 what  sin  are  they  categorized  under  ?  why ?

jules  belongs  to  the  sin  of  #pride  through  &  through  .   after  all  ,   if  there  was  one  damning  trait  to  send  her  straight  into  the  pits  of  burning  infernos  ,  her  prideful  sense  of  self  would  be  it  .   that’s  not  to  say  she’s  arrogant  (  nor  am  i  saying  she  isn’t  )  ,  but  it’s  more  that  she  can’t  take  being  undermined  or  allow  the  supposed  undermining  to  go  unpunished  .   she  has  a  great  deal  of  #pride  in  her  own  self  worth  &  capabilities  ,  though  she’s  usually  loathe  to  make  it  known  in  plain  terms  ,  &  if  she  feels  attacked  in  that  manner  ,  she’ll  completely  close  up  .   this  often  ,  as  you’ll  surely  be  able  to  tell  ,   beckons  problematic  shit  .

 what  got  them  sent  to  the  academy  ?

      during  jules’  senior  year  at  nyu  ,  she  was  contacted  by  her  agent  (  shared  with  her  father  )  &  offered  an  audition  for  a  leading  role  in  a  major  hollywood  studio  film  .   throughout  the  years  ,  she  dabbled  in  theater  &  attracted  a  starring  role  or  two  along  the  way  ,  especially  in  school  productions  ,   but  the  plan  for  success  was  always  envisioned  after  college  .   when  she  got  the  call  ,  however  ,  she  handled  it  with  a  happy - go - lucky  fuck  it  sort  of  approach  ,  &  a  week  later  ,  when  she  received  the  good - bearing  call  ,  there  was  no  backing  out  ,  or  so  she  thought  .   tentatively  dropping  out  of  the  semester  in  which  she  would  graduate  ,  jules  modeled  the  next  few  months  of  her  life  around  the  film  ,  happily  doing  so  .   

      yet  ,  the  first  week  into  rehearsals  brought  down  a  cloud  so  dark  she  thought  she’d  choke  under  it  .   she  overheard  a  few  producers  on  their  lunch  break  ,  talking  about  this - & - that - esque  bullshit  ,  but  just  as  she  was  passing  ,  one  of  them  made  a  comment  about  the  peralta  girl  ,  &  how  hollywood  legacies  are  the  roaches  of  the  industry  .   how  directors  from  the  middle  ages  should  just  stick  to  ruining  things  behind  the  camera  ,  not  forcing  a  disaster  in  front  of  it  .   

      that  day  ,  jules  walked  out  of  set  &  never  took  a  step  back  in  .   effectively  ruining  her  future  career  in  the  process  ,  she  ghosted  all  contact  from  the  production  &  even  went  as  far  to  jet  off  to  brazil  to  regenerate  with  her  mom  as  an  escape  .   she  couldn’t  even  pick  up  where  she  left  off  during  the  semester  ,  &  simply  had  to  sit  back  &  witness  her  classmates  of  four  years  graduate  without  her  .   her  parents  were  furious  ,  but  the  only  thing  she  gave  in  return  was  a  steely  silence  ,  refusing  even  turn  a  glare  to  her  father  .   now  ,  she’s  been  shoved  into  the  hands  of  the  academy  ,  biding  the  days  until  she  could  return  to  nyu  in  the  fall  .  

what  do  you  think  they’ll  struggle  with  the  most  at  the  academy ?

tbh  ,  the  biggest  issue  for  jules  is  the  resentment  curling  at  her  core  .   at  her  father  ,  the  film  ,  the  academy  ,  herself  .   right  now  she’s  just  in  a  foul  mood  &  sick  at  being  forced  into  glitterati  rehab  ,  but  her  #pride  won’t  allow  her  to  fail  ,  even  if  she  wishes  to  do  it  just  to  spite  everyone  .   she  is  a  people  person  ,  however  ,  &  will almost  definitely  warm  up  ,  even  if  it’s  just  for  appearances  sake  .

extra  details  :  links  you’d  like  to  incorporate  ,  wanted  connections  ,  literally anything  else  you  want  to  include  ,  etc  .

wanted  connections  will  be  coming  soon  !   for  now  ,  please  enjoy  this  authentic  video  of  jules  chillin  in  her  fav  corner  of  the  world  ,  aka  italia  ,  taken  by  her  bff  eli  😔✌️

[renegadeapostle]

so I'm answering this here because it was just too legit for the curiouscat word limit. it's been too long since some hegemon talk, let's do this!! let's have an embarrassing deep dive into how i do character work

Miss Eva - I knew from the get go eva was going to be the protagonist - or at least, the voice from which the story begins. (Pretty much the first scene I knew for the story was the Beltway, and the very specific feeling of horror/wonder Eva feels at seeing Talulah controlling the grid. the essence of that is where a lot of the entire story grew from). I knew I did NOT want her to be a passive element in the story, a blank slate protagonist for people to read and project themselves on to - I wanted her to have an undeniable personality that people would either like or hate (but you know what? I've not had ANYONE say they don't like her - even when she's clearly in the wrong????? Narrative bias is strongggg). I wanted her to have a ruthlessness about her and a fierce need to protect people she loves, without much compassion for anyone else. I wanted her to be someone who knew when it came down to it she probably wouldn't do the right or moral thing. There's a lot of your prototypical Mean Girl about her and I love that. There's much of amoral characters like Selina Kyle in Eva.

Talulah - this is going to sound ridiculous but you know tie dye girl in the parent trap?

THIS IS TALULAH ENERGY. THIS RIGHT HERE.

When I was a kid I read the Trixie Belden books and there was this girl in them called Diana and Trixie was SO ENVIOUS of her in what was clearly a tween crush because Diana was PERFECT, rich and pretty with violet eyes and long eyelashes and always in a good mood. Wikipedia says of miss Diana 'She can be a bit gullible at times. She is not the most intelligent, but is a good sport, smiling and laughing often, especially at herself when she makes mistakes.' and that is Talulah energy. She's the girl you would expect to be the protagonist and it was very very important to me to view her initially through Eva's love/hate, I want to be near you but I'm terrified of you feelings. Talulah is a girl we will see much of through other people's eyes and she looks slightly different every time, and that too is important to her character. In that way she has inspiration from women-as-figureheads in literature and the way they have been misinterpreted - your Helen of Troys.

West... where to even begin. Dioscuri, obviously, the gemini twins and a sense of greek tragedy and loss and the terror of violence that plays out emotionally and intimately. Mary Shelley - like, I could say 'all singularity stories' but it's not, it is very specifically a Frankenstein type inspiration, of the creator's obligation to the creation, how it mirrors a family bond and how it can warp from there. Also in a way there's inspiration in a reactionary way from the abundance of just boring or uneventful robot stories - not saying I'm like, the fucking be all and end all of artificial intelligence but I have always been weary of Robots Taking Over The World narratives. There's much of Asimov here too, though less.... mid century pompousness (or so I like to think). But also inspiration from stories with emotional vulnerability, of boys born from toxic places and struggling to find their place and trust others and navigate a world that wants to cast them as a villain. that's something i try to be really aware of when i write him as a black male character.

Teo comes from a place of wanting to deconstruct masculinity and examine what things like male expectations and PTSD and weaponising male bodies. probably my biggest inspiration for him is The Steadfast Tin Soldier fairytale, which is one of my very favourites. Also big for teo (and yes lmao i acknowledge it's odd) is St John from Jane Eyre.... for very specific reasons that we will see!! There's much of Victorian/gothic archetypes in his corner of the story. I also wanted to position teo in a place that's usually feminine in the story - that is, the character that is important to the protagonist (Eva) who suffers but we experience it through the lens of the protagonist. That's usually always throwaway women and I wanted to turn that on its head in AFOT.

Sucre is.... a big old mish mash of many things. I wanted him to somehow be a little bit Byron (as he actually was) and Byronic (as ppl thought he was). There's much of Byron's poem 'The Corsair' in him. And also Richard Siken. And also many, many biblical/religious motifs. And also pirates - treasure island-y, amoral, charming pirates. There's also some dick grayson about sucre - as in, he has been through A LOT, grew up in a way that would traumatise most, and while he has of course been affected by it it hasn't sunk his natural effervescence.

Divi.... how even to examine divi lmao. Well since the very start of planning the story I knew I wanted an antagonist who saw themselves as having the moral high ground against the protagonists, and who had a cat and mouse sexual tension with the protagonist (Eva). Originally there were going to be lots of different agents/people chasing after Eva and Talulah (including the character that turned into.... WEST!!! dun dun dunnnnn) and I don't remember how it ended up just being divi but he started to eclipse the others, especially when I positioned him as an Antipodes agent. There are many, many inspirations for him in classical/biblical works but they're almost all spoilers so 🙊. But you know that Medea quote 'a gentleman is a patient wolf'??? AND THERE YOU GO