#of all the lies you could've told john

[frau-kali]

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

Reconciliation: knight!price x Princess!reader

It felt odd walking to the barracks in the middle of the night but you wanted to do things right this time.

Usually when you snuck out in the middle of the night you never told anyone or had anyone come with you. No one would let you go to the fields at such an hour and sometimes you needed to clear your mind outside the stone walls of your bedchamber.

There was a lot on your mind and after everything that happened yesterday, you didn't want to be alone.

You were silent as you snuck in to the barracks. You made sure to step around the other knights before you came to Sir John Price, who was deep in sleep.

You hesitated to wake him only for a moment, a strange desire to feel his warmth against your fingertips spurring you forward as you shook him gently.

Price awoke immediately but disoriented. It took him just a few moments to recognize you before he gave you an incredulous look, opening his mouth to say something before you quietly shushed him.

You scurried out of the barracks and waited for him at the door, being joined by him just a few moments later. You pointedly ignored the soft look of his tousled hair and the sleep still in his eyes.

"Why are you awake at this hour?" He asked almost too loudly for your liking.

You shushed him again and quickly told him to be quiet while you looked around to see if anyone heard. Once you realized it was safe you turned to him and gave him a serious look.

"I wanted to watch the stars." You whispered and he looked at you with disbelief. "We'll both be caught if you don't be quiet."

"You couldn't watch them from your window?" He groaned barely above a whisper and you rolled your eyes.

"I could've very well gone out by myself like all the other times-"

"Other times?"

You sighed heavily and began to make your way to the fields. You should've just gone on your own, you hadn't been attacked any of the other times so you shouldn't feel any different...yet having him with you made you feel safer.

It was strange, you went from not wanting him around to waking him up so he could be by your side.

"How many times?" He demanded but you shrugged.

"Do you think I count?" You said and he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"You'll be the death of me, your highness."

You made it out into the field and every step you took disturbed the fireflies that hide in the grass. Already you felt like you had a clearer mind as you sat down.

"Sit." You beckoned him beside you. "I don't have the patience for your hovering right now."

Price kept some space between the two of you as he sat down with a grunt. He said nothing else and soon it was just the night, you both, and the stars.

You were in deep thought. You couldn't quite believe that your mother had called off your marriage because you never expected the king to have lied to you and her. You didn't like him but you certainly never thought he'd try to pull your kingdom in a war you had no reason to be in just because he had no money.

If the information hadn't been found, you would've been married off and stuck in a war, your kingdom would've suffered just as much and you might've died, your knights might have died.

You know that your mother mainly did it for political reasons; there wasn't proper time to prepare for a war and it would look bad on her and you if you plunged the kingdom into war.

But you didn't know why Sir John Price had done it?

You weren't stupid, you knew the only way this information was found was because of him yet you didn't know if he had told your mother for the reason she had to break off the marriage or for something else.

You wanted it to be for a different reason.

"How's your arm?" Price kept his voice low but didn't whisper.

"It itches." You frowned when you placed you hand over the wrappings.

"Good. It's healing."

You turned to him and he raised an eyebrow. You hesitated for a moment when you remembered the way he hadn't even hesitate save you even after all of the hell you put him through. He had dressed your wound without protest, he even apologized when he thought he hurt you.

It confused you. How could a man who you thought hated you treat you in such a way?

"I didn't properly thank you for saving me." You said and his face fell.

"You don't have to-"

"I do. Who knows what would've happened if you hadn't shown up...so thank you."

Price blinked a few times and sucked in his lips. He nodded and looked away from you as he shifted in his spot, almost like he was uncertain.

"Of course, your highness."

You wished he'd say something else, you wished he'd tell you why he had been so quick and why he had done it without a second thought. You wished he'd tell you what he really thought, if maybe he felt that strange fuzziness in his chest the same way you did.

"Why did you break off my marriage?" You asked and he tensed up.

"As I said before it's my duty to protect you." He said and you couldn't help but feel disheartened.

"Is that all?"

You hoped that your disappointment wasn't noticeable especially when he looked at you with slight confusion.

Price went quiet and he sucked in his lips again. He looked deep in thought as if he had think about what he was going to say. When his eyes met yours they were softer with a strange look in them as he took a moment before he spoke.

"You wished to not marry him."

You blinked with surprise, you chest going warm as you stared at him incredulously. That's all it took? You saying no? You're honestly not sure if you believed it, especially when it was Sir John Price who had fulfilled your request.

No man who hated a woman would do such a thing.

"And I thought it was rather rash that the Queen have you married so swiftly without any proper precautions." He quickly added on but you didn't really catch it.

He broke off your marriage because you didn't want it.

"Oh." That was all you could say.

"If it was an overstep-"

"It wasn't...just surprising is all."

It did make things more complicated, your mother had told you that she will have to find someone else but the search had seemed to slow down just a little, which meant you would have more time figure out what you truly wanted.

You weren't sure what to do but you didn't have the energy to think about all of that right now. Instead, you'd rather focus on the man who sat next to you.

As much as it was annoying to have him follow you everywhere it could be worse and after him saving you, you thought it would be best if things changed.

"Do you think we could be friends?" You wondered and it was his turn to look at you wish disbelief.

It would an inappropriate friendship, one you knew your mother would frown upon but no one had to know. You had kept your hatred for each other a secret, a friendship would be the same.

"If that's what you want-" He said but you sent him a look.

"I asked what you think, what you want." You said firmly. "I won't have you pretending. If you don't think we could be friends or at least more polite with each other then forget I said anything."

Price scoffed, a small smile pulling at his lips before he shook his head.

"I think we could be." He said softly. "If you stop sneaking out without me."

"Then you should be ready for me to wake you up at times like this." You retorted and he sighed heavily.

"You run me around, what's lack of sleep on top of that?"

You rolled your eyes and laid back to look at the stars. You watched them twinkle and imagined a life where you didn't have to worry about the kingdom and the politics, you didn't have to worry about whether or not someone was trying to exploit you or not. A time where you could marry someone you loved.

Out here you could relax. Under the stars you were just yourself.

"Are you really going to complain about this?" You gestured to the sky.

"No." He said softly as he watched you. "I supposed I shouldn't."

A/N: just because they're friends doesn't mean they won't bicker it's their love language

Tags: @deadbranch @makayla-666 @glitterypirateduck @dumbbitchgalore @m0chac0ffee @dragonbe-writing @sleepyoriana @twismare @blush-haze @waiting-so-long @alilstressyandlotdepressy

[angelsdean]

All these thoughts also prompted me to think abt what John and Mary's fights were often about, especially the fight where John leaves and Dean then comforts Mary. And I think a big part of it was Mary keeping secrets and sneaking around with regard to hunting.

We know she was still hunting in 1980, when she saves Asa Fox. Dean would've been a year old and the hunt is not local, it's up in Canada. Mary says she's been tracking this werewolf for a long time and that they have history. I do think when she says "a long time" she means years and that she hasn't actively been tracking it but it's been something on the back-burner that she's kept an eye on all these years. But that still means she left for a number of days at the very least, and I wonder what she told John. What excuse did she come up with to justify suddenly taking off when they have a baby at home. And no, I don't think she needed to be there as "the mom" to take care of Dean or that she can't spend time away from the home or that fathers are incapable of taking care of their children or anything like that. But I think John would certainly wonder what's taking her away from them so suddenly. What could possibly be so important. And with a hunt like this, I don't think she could've exactly given him a set time-frame for her return.

Now, imagine that happening multiple times. Imagine that happening again when Sam is just a few months old. She says she has to go visit her uncle who's poorly (father of the Campbell cousins. The uncle that paid for her headstone when she died). And then she's gone for longer than she anticipated. And John is just suspicious. And when she comes back they argue about it. "I know you're lying! Just tell me the truth, Mary! What, are you seeing someone else?" And Mary holding firm to her lies because her family cannot know about the supernatural and hunting. Because she doesn't want her kids growing up like she did. Because John is her suburban fairytale. He can't know. And then John snaps. He's pissed. He thinks she's cheating while he's working to provide for the family AND watching the kids in her absence. So he flings a "Is Sam even mine?" at her in his rage and she slaps him and tells him "Don't you dare" and then John storms out in a huff but then calls later to talk about it more and Mary shuts him down. "No, John. … We’re not having this conversation again... Think about what? … You’ve two boys at home. …"

I can imagine a version of this phone call going something like this:

John calls. Maybe apologizes for what he said, but mostly just wants her to be honest with him.

John: Please, Mary, can we just talk about this.

Mary: No, John.

John: I just want you to tell me the truth! What are you hiding? What's going on that you can't tell me?

Mary: We're not having this conversation again.

John: Oh okay, 'we're not having this conversation again.' Well then can you blame me for where my mind is going? What would you think, huh?

Mary: Think about what?

John: You know how it looks, Mary. And I just, I can't keep doing this--

Mary: You have two boys at home. (and ohh the delicious irony of that in the context of her being the one leaving to continue hunting in secret)

John, probably, since the convo seems to continue: Oh that is rich coming from you right now, Mary.

Anyways, this is only one of many many scenarios I can imagine of their fights. And it's perhaps a little too sympathetic to John, but! I enjoy thinking of John complexly, especially considering how Young John is presented in SPN, and also John in the opening scene of the Pilot seems like the easy-going family man, who definitely had underlying issues prior to Mary's death (thank you SPNWIN for confirming that) but clearly those issues got worse after Mary's death, and for the most part he wasn't yet the guy we see him become after he is transformed by grief and anger. Also s12 Mary's rose-tinted recollections of John being such a good father, which starkly contrast to Dean's later memories of John, I think it's not a huge leap to say John pre-Mary's death was a good father, and I think seeing Mary leave them (likely repeatedly) under secretive circumstances for days at a time would have bothered John back then and been a continuous point of contention in their marriage.

And again, this is all simply one angle of interpretation, theorizing, and headcanoning and by no means the only possible scenario.

[dtfpeta]

Domesticity with Price...

(a/n: yes I want to make my lover a home cooked meal. yes I want him to wrap his arms around me while I cook. also I was this close to putting nsfw but I may just make a part two)

tags: husband!price, fluff, mentions of pregnancy, f!reader

Word Count: 1.8k __________

Price who comes home to his doting wife standing in front of the stove. A roaring pot of boiling water being salted by your delicate hands which form a harsh pinch on the granules before releasing them into the porcelain dish.

He watches from the door as you slowly canter your hips, humming along to the soft melody of Al Green from your distant record player. His cheeks contort with a smile when he hears your abysmal attempt to recall the lyrics. Startling you out of your unaware serenade when his hands catch in the fabric of your dress to wrap around your waist.

"Smells good." He comments regarding the dish. His face is buried in the side of your neck, breathing in the scent of garlic, rosemary, and other spices that coat the house in its aroma. Your own fragrance of vanilla overwhelms his senses as he sighs into the crook of your neck.

"It's not nice to sneak up on someone like that..." You chastise, knowing the irony that lies in your statement being as stealth is not something your husband is unaccustomed to. "Could've burned myself." You add, half-heartedly scolding and rolling your eyes as his arms tighten their purchase on your hips.

On the stove lies a pot boiling with its now added component of rigatoni. To its side is a sizzling pan that has been providing the house with its encapsulating smell. John eyes the skillet. The melted butter works to caramelize the now translucent onions coated in sparse flakes of red pepper and rosemary. A wooden spatula wielded in your hand stirs the minced garlic cloves, doing your best to prevent their quick to burn nature.

Price loves your cooking and you love to cook for him. Seeing as his face melts into bliss when he tastes what magic you have cast on something as simple as a chicken pot pie. Or the way his eyes bulge when you reveal that a dish he has been scarfing down like a starved dog over the past several months contains mushrooms.

Ever since that day, he has not once argued about an ingredient in your cooking. Even as he eyes the tomato sauce being added to the pan, knowing he is going to suffer a severe case of heartburn but almost welcoming it, as he knows it will accompany an array of flavors he will be holding up his plate for more of.

"M'sorry love." He relishes. "Been looking forward to this all day. N' watching you from the door just made me miss ya' even more."

You scoff at his cheesy comment, placing your left hand to rest on his forearm that is draped around you as your right stirs at the still hard noodles.

You lay your utensil down and lean back into his embrace. Closing your eyes as you feel your bodies link together like a puzzle. One piece being a head taller than the other, but fitting together nonetheless. You sway with your husband to the tempo of the song playing in the background. His body is warm against your back, being stripped of his tactical gear and left in a black cotton shirt tucked into the waist of his same toned cargo pants, the legs of which are folded above his combat boots.

"How was work?" You ask, eyes still closed and body entangled in him. He regards your question with a low hum, feet lightly stepping side to side.

"Hm, the usual. Told some of the boys we could treat em' to dinner sometime. Be nice to get together, maybe show you off a lil'?"

He lightly pinches at your sides while pulling you closer to him. The scruff of his beard dances against your skin as he attacks your neck in quickly scattered kisses.

"John!" You laugh while attempting to distance yourself from his assault. Only to be swiftly turned around where you find his blue eyes smiling fondly at you. The warm tinted light from a nearby lamp casts soft shadows on the crows feet that crinkle near his eyes. The edges of his smile lines sharpening the more he beams at you.

There's not a place on Earth he would rather be.

For the longest, he distanced himself from love. Only finding that unachievable compromises would be asked of him, and due to his work, he was never able to fulfill those wishes. It only put a strain on his and his partners' relationship. He learned to deal with the lack of intimate companionship over the years. Just having the bond of his brothers in arms till he would return to his empty flat and scrounge up whatever microwaveable dish hadn't gone freezer burnt or remnants of leftovers left in his barren refrigerator. Until he met someone he could incorporate into the unpredictable schedule of his life.

The first time you cooked for him he was floored. Joking about how he'd have to hire you as his personal chef and saying how he could only dream of coming home to this every week. You had brought the ingredients to his apartment, insisting that you would treat him to a hot meal if he helped you, which he gladly agreed to. He stood slicing carrots and celery while you stirred a pot of chicken stock, placing sprigs of thyme and bay leaves into the broth as the chicken roasted in the oven, soon to be shredded and added to the pot. Said pot being three times bigger than your head.

"You trying to feed the whole squadron?" He'd teased. To which you only responded with a light snicker, knowing that in making such a large portion would provide him with leftovers for the rest of the week-and then some.

Several years later you now stood in your shared home, a simple wedding band adorning the both of you two's hands. Price's socks litter the shared space until you have to reprimand him to pick them up. Him responding with his own accusations of how you frequently leave your bra on the couch as well as your adversity to keep your hair ties in one place. What can you say, it's just more convenient when they're around the house.

The two of you's cleaning habits aren't the only thing that could use work though. The decorations are an obvious clash of one person who enhances the space with homely, comforting pieces, and another who has a hard time letting go of secondhand artifacts. And after Price's constant defense of his 'live laugh love' banner hanging on the wall of the kitchen, you began to give in to the cliché relic.

A more than familiar tune begins to play from the record player.

"Oh my God" Price's teeth shine through his grin as he picks up on the melody as well. It's the song you shared your first dance together to.

His coordinated hands move to your hips, your own responding by wrapping around his neck. You gaze up at him. The quickening of your heart makes its frequent appearance as he looks down at you. The butterflies you feel every time you look at him have yet to diminish their strength over the years. Even as you heard stories of the dreaded period following the honeymoon phase where couples do nothing but bicker, your heart remained the same.

The only thing you can focus on is his hickory-toned voice humming to the lyrics of the track. The vibration rumbles through his chest, making its way to your ear resting upon him. He sways with your body against his until you are replicating the dance from that night. Since that night he has always made it apparent you were his first priority. He protects and serves you, as you have brought a peace to his life he didn't think was possible.

"Y'know on my way home," he began "saw this woman with her kid. Maybe 5 years old. He was sitting on a bench while she was on the ground tying his shoe. He was swinging his leg, reading some comic book to her. Poor lasses feet barely touched the ground!" He lets out a breathy laugh before pausing for a moment. "Just got me thinking."

"About?"

"Bein' a dad." He stated, kissing the temple of your face. "Making you a mum."

You smiled into his chest. John knew you wanted kids, and he did too. The time just never found itself convenient. And even now there are uncertainties, but the knowledge you have that John would be an excellent father left you planting seedlings of the idea in his head when you had the chance. Passing by a pair of cute baby shoes in the store. The ring of adolescent laughter when you'd visit the aquarium. Or even a dress you would buy, waiting for your husband to compliment it before mentioning the garment worked as a maternity piece too.

Something had been pulling at his paternal strings lately, however. He yearned to fill the house with the both of your makings. Leaving your marks in its foundation. Whether that be with the rug you both haggled for at the flea market. The broken spring of your living room couch, product of an intense wrestling match between you two. (In which both parties were considered victorious by the end.) Or the poolhouse-toned blue paint that made its acquaintance on the crown molding of your bedroom wall. (Also caused by some spout of play fighting or whatever attempt Price had to get his hands on you.)

You leaned back to search his face, only finding a look of great fondness pulling at his features. Your palms came to cradle the sides of his face before a smile stretched on your own.

"Yeah. I think I'd like that." You brought his lips to yours, embracing him in a tender touch as you laughed into the kiss. Your hold on one another tightened. Knowing that Price was ready to take such a giant step now made you giddy as you imagined him holding his future child, playing make-believe with them, and cleaning up their bumps and bruises from playing in the yard.

"Can't believe you're saying yes to a baby before a dog, John." You both laughed before you turned your head at the smell of burnt garlic.

"Shit!" You quickly grabbed a wooden spoon to stir at the red mixture before turning the stove off.

"Don't tell me you lost your touch already, sweetheart?"

"You were distracting me." You declare, pointing your spatula at the towering man. "Just get the bowls from the cabinet and set the table, yeah?"

"Of course, hun." He mocked.

You glared a burning look into the back of his before he did as instructed, your temper cooling as you poured the pot of soft noodles into a strainer.

You and John were able to turn a house into your home. Soon the floor and walls would be sheathed in memories of your family. One of the first being your dinner of a burnt tomato rigatoni pasta.

[konigsblog]

How about yandere König, soap, and ghost (if that’s too many it’s fine!) when someone other than them hurts their darling

yandere könig, soap and ghost when someone other than them hurts their darling (gn!reader)

warnings: yandere behaviour, description of murder, blood, reader is scared of yan (sometimes) slight angst, making out, protective behaviour, obsessive behaviour

masterlist

simon ghost riley

-he saw it whilst you were making dinner, just as you flipped whatever, he saw the bruises on your arm you sustained from a few nights ago whilst out.

"[name], what is that??" he asked very bluntly, you nervously laughed it off, trying to explain it was just a bruise but he could tell through your eyes that were slightly glossy, you were lying.

simon sighed deeply, disappointed. "don't you lie to me now." he warned you, his eyes never leaving yours as he held the wrist in his hands. "when we were out a couple nights ago, a very drunk friend ran into me, grabbed my wrist and squeezed it hard and he also kicked my shin.." you revealed your lower knee to him, a large bruise forming.

anger took over his mind, groaning, "what was his name?" he just kept questioning you. "simon it's really n-!" he cut you off, "tell me the truth. " si demanded, you could nearly see steam coming out his ears

-once you told him his name, he stormed off. he came back holding a gun, covered head to toe in blood, and holding a black bin bag, that seemed like it was carrying something heavy..

a body?

john soap mactavish

-you two were making out, he grabbed your thigh trying to pull your legs over his shoulder, you winced in pain.

he stared daggers into your eyes, "darling, what's this?" he pulled down your trousers, seeing a large bruise covering the whole of your upper thigh. "uhm, we-" you attempted to lie. trying to save your friend from a punishment.

"what is it?!" he grabbed your thigh, pushing down on the pain. "i won't stop until you tell me." you cried out, your leg feeling numb. "okay-okay!! it was [best friends name] they didn't mean -" abruptly, he rose to his feet and left the door. slamming it shut.

-a few hours past, you were stressed. nail hitting stressed. hard footsteps banged against concrete, the door opened with a click and a creak.

he stood their, gun in hand. his hair had splatters of a scarlet liquid dripping down to his neck and onto his white shirt. "i would do anything for you, love."

but what you heard was, "only i can hurt you." as you glanced to the bruise, it wasn't your friend. it was him.

könig

-just as you two were getting ready for a bath, you discarded of all your clothes before stepping into the foamy, bubbly hot water. "maus?" his voice cracked, assuming he did it.

"kö, it's just a bruise..!" you tried playing it off and switching the subject, but nothing would make him budge. he kneeled next to the bath. grabbing your wet leg. "please maus..." he begged, you couldn't say no.

"okay... it was a friend of yours, when we were over and you were asleep he wanted to do something - he was drunk though - i pushed him off of me and and he pushed and kicked my leg." you mumbled. it wasn't a lie, the man was drunk.

"thank you, baby." he cut the conversation there. it was quiet, awkwardly quiet. everytime you said something it was either; shut down, ignored or just a one word answer.

he wrapped a towel around your wet naked body, carrying you bridal style to your bed. he placed you down, cuddling into you - a nightly routine you had grown used to over the course while living with könig.

he traced around the bruise, making sure not to hurt you further. he was delicate. "schatzi, im not gonna be here tonight i have paperwork to do." he lied, you knew that.

anytime someone had disagreed with you, or hurt you, or anything of a sort. their screams filled the basements eerie silence. gunshots could've been heard, he stuck to a knife usually.

he came back up, drenched in blood. he got onto his knees and held his arms out in a hugging manner, you hugged him.

he loved you after all.

[gothamite-rambler]

Anyone who has worked can relate to the "This could've been an email" meetings.

Green Arrow: Welcome to the latest Justice League meeting! I know I promised donuts and coffee, but I was in a rush and didn’t get a chance to pick them up.

Batman, fuming, hurled his phone at Green Arrow. The impact jolted Green Arrow's head back in shock, and he instinctively covered his eye in pain.

Batman (enraged): Why am I even here?! For crying out loud! I left work for this!

Batman stormed off, frustration radiating from him.

Green Arrow: For crying out loud, I told you to make sure he didn’t have a weapon!

Superman: I didn’t account for him using his phone as one. Dang it, now I have to go talk to him!

Aquaman (being helpful): I’ll go with you!

Superman groaned annoyed at the man's chipper morning energy and hurried after Batman.

Superman (calling after Batman): I’ve got donuts!

Aquaman: I have crackers.

Superman (out of the room): Would you shut up?

Green Arrow rubbed his eye as Wonder Woman and Vixen suppressed their laughter.

Green Arrow: Nah, I’m good. Just hit me in my good eye—the one that’s important for archery. Don’t anyone run over to check on me.

Black Canary sighed, finally looking away from her phone.

Black Canary (flatly): Omg, are you okay, Ollie? We wouldn’t want you to get hurt.

Green Arrow: Sweetie, you could’ve put a little more conviction into your tone.

Black Canary: I have a concert tonight and woke me up in the middle of resting my voice.

Green Lantern (Hal) yawned, clearly exhausted, and stood up to leave.

GL: If there are no snacks, you could’ve made this an email. Not having breakfast snacks is just shameful.

Vixen (betrayed): Right? I specifically braved the nightmare of traffic for free coffee! And you lied to me! What kind of hero doesn’t provide food in a meeting!?

Wonder Woman (amused): Yeah, Ollie, that’s not very heroic. Bet Roy would’ve had snacks.

Green Arrow let out an exasperated sigh, desiring to keep the meeting going despite the heroes beginning to exit.

Green Arrow: If I leave now, can you all promise to stick around for the important meeting—the one that isn’t a “could’ve been an email” meeting?!

John Stewart (Green Lantern): Just make sure you grab me a bear claw while you’re out. Thanks!

Wonder Woman: And don’t forget my peach tea!

Green Arrow groaned in frustration, shaking his head before marching out to fulfill the snack demands.

[lucienne-thee-librarian]

Rose Walker and John Dee: Narrative Foils

Okay this has been percolating in my brain for awhile and I have to shout about it. So. These two characters...Rose and John Dee. Couldn't seem more different on the surface, right? One's a young American black woman, vs older British-raised white guy who's lived all over the world, one painted as a major villain, the other a main protagonist of multiple episodes of the first season. But if you look beyond that, I think these two are, deliberately or not, perfect parallels to each other for their similarities as much as their differences.

First: let's list the similarities:

Difficult childhoods. John Dee's father was...literally absent and that is almost certainly a good thing. But his mother kept moving around to survive, changing her identity. She may have done what she felt she had to do but as a result John was left with no sense of stability and a Very Big Thing about people lying because he feels his mother has lied to him all his life. Rose, conversely, had a father...part of the time. But just by the fearful way Miranda Walker talked about her husband in one scene, trying to prevent Rose from confronting him over taking Jed (but not Rose...which, SERIOUSLY who does that, this man was not a good father, I like how much this one little scene implies) away with him...you get the distinct impression she lived in fear of her soon-to-be-ex-husband's anger. So Rose had a father who was...not good and lost her brother years ago and the pair disappeared before she and her mother could find out what happened. When the show starts her mother is dead too, much like Ethel Cripps died when she went to see him. So both Rose and John had childhoods centered around absent or unreliable fathers and the traumatic loss of their mothers.

Both were given access to great power over the world of dreams, critically: when they were infants and could not possibly know, much less agree to what they were inheriting. John Dee ended up in that hospital in the first place for misusing the ruby that Ethel stole from Roderick Burgess. Rose Walker was literally born a vortex due to inheriting it from her great-grandmother thanks to Desire's interference.

Both end up being chased down by Dream.

Now, the two end up in completely opposite places. But why? What's the difference?

When John Dee gets the ruby, immediately he begins killing his way out and across the country until he reaches the diner. On some level, he wants freedom and that's understandable after a lifetime of being locked up. But he clearly is very skilled at using the ruby which he even modified, and his first and immediate act upon getting the ruby back was to kill every single guard in his way. He didn't try to find another option, he immediately defaulted to the most violent way out. He almost killed Rosemary, though in the end he decided against it, but only because she helped him and didn't lie.

And then when he got to the diner, he spent an entire day and night toying with a bunch of random people until he got bored and let them kill each other.

Unquestionably some part of John was influenced by the ruby, the more the closer it was to him. We don't know exactly how much, we'll probably never know. But it is...alarming, to say the least, how he immediately and repeatedly begins to act not just after having it awhile, but after two seconds of getting it back.

John has traveled and seen the world long before he got locked up. But despite all the opportunities for education and experience he could've had, his worldview has no room for any shades of grey. To him, all lies are equally bad as the lies his mother told him, and all equally as bad as each other. It reminds me a lot of the evangelical Christian idea of "sin-levelling" where all sins are equally reprehensible in God's eyes so nobody is worse than the other - but also, no one better. If you have a "sinful" thought or make one mistake, you're just as worthy of damnation as the worst, most violent people.

Now leaving aside how that's actually treated in these churches in practice (which. LOL all sins are equal. Sure they are) that's obviously a little...fucked? The idea that actually, thinking hateful thoughts is as bad as murder, is as bad as stealing is as bad as...lust?? Gossip? Is both failig to recognize serious harms, and the difference between that and much more minor things one can do to others, or between all that and straight up thoughtcrime. It creates an inflated sense of harm for things that don't really deserve to be treated or even thought of in the same boat with atrocities and violence.

John Dee is if someone took a look at that sort of moral thinking and went "cool system you got there; what if I hijacked it and made it all about lying?"

His worldview is strictly black and white, no room for human error or understanding past a certain point. To him, if you tell a lie, no matter your intentions or the effect of your actions, it's all the same.

Meanwhile Rose has been used without her knowing it, by both Desire and in a way, Dream himself. He knows what her fate must be but for a mixture of motives, mainly mercy but also the knowledge that she could help him find the Corinthian, he spares her.

And his doing so and not telling her her ultimate fate, was the entire reason the Corinthian was able to slip in and find her in the first place. He shows up with Jed, after Rose has tried and failed to get the foster care system to actually let her make contact with her brother or do more than the bare minimum to investigate his well-being. So honestly, no wonder she trusted him at first! He saved her brother! Her brother seems to like him so he must be fine!

Rose has spent this entire season, her entire life, at the mercy of others, trying to carve out her own destiny. But she never uses her powers to deliberately hurt others- any harm she causes is either by complete accident or in attempts meant to defend her own life or her brother.

When she was a child she had no power to save Jed; for some reason we're not told the court sided with her father and allowed Jed to be taken separately, and then the man effectively custodially kidnapped his own son before dying himself and Jed was lost to the system of another state. Rose loses her mother later to some illness, and her friend Judy to John Dee's megalomania. And when she's finally an adult, she tries to find Jed but is flatly denied not only a chance at custody but even to know where he is - at least at first. And this whole time, the vortex she carried in her blood has been hanging over her head as a silent ticking time bomb. Her days are numbered, she will soon, eventually, become a living weapon to blend all the minds of all the dreamers of that world and eventually, the whole universe together into one cancerous magical sea of madness - and the only way to prevent this, we think, is for Dream to kill her. Her fate was sealed the moment she was born and the moment Dream was freed and the vortex awoken. All this was set in motion via Desire, someone much older and infinitely more powerful than herself.

So it would be more than understandable for someone in her situation to snap a little upon learning the truth. Honestly it's kind of amazing to me that she believed Dream when he finally did tell her everything, given he'd put off doing this until the very last minute because of his own reluctance to kill her.

And yet, when Rose finally learns the truth and her fate, she ultimately offers to take the fall, freely. She sees what the activated vortex does to the minds of everyone around her - first revealing everyone's most secret fears and fantasies and then pulling them into the whirlpool of her own power. And she refuses to let that happen. She values her own life in a way most of us would, in a totally understandable and sympathetic way. But unlike John Dee, she also values other people, even when they disappoint her. Hal blatantly tells her he doesn't care about the place they all live in half as much as the chance for success, but she still cares for him. The world is full of people, some of whom have hurt her or hindered her quest to find Jed but she doesn't seek revenge.

John sees the failures of humanity and its dark side and decides that those sins are worth condemnation through the power of his ruby, and assumes he is a worthy judge. Rose hears she could destroy the world and decides that no, the world is worth saving even if that means she has to die, much as she doesn't want or deserve to.

John Dee is, without even realizing it himself, a perfect mirror himself of the potential selfishness and cruelty humans can inflict on each other in the name of "I'm just all about honesty" "knowing what's best for you better than you do" and "fuck you, got mine". Rose is a mirror of humanity at its best - someone with dignity and a sense of morals who doesn't appreciate being lied to or used, and not a doormat - her first instinct is to fight for her life and her brother's - and she's also selfless and caring even for people she doesn't know, even for people who Dee would've argued weren't even worth saving.

[xreaderbooks]

Your thoughts on obx season 3 ???

Warning: SPOILERS Be prepared for a whole essay of my thoughts :)

I could not stand Big John, mf really just did not care about John B or at least cared more about finding el dorado and/or the treasure than his own son. Kind of made me think that John B was thriving when his dad was dead (yes, I know he actually wasn't thriving but it just hurt to see how his dad came back into his life and he was actually more toxic than you remembered).

Following up with that... IMO Ward is a better father than Big John lowkey.

John B needed to speak up! The daddy issues were real, I felt bad for him tbh

What is up with villains and their need to narrate their whole life story, I hated Singh, this short ass mf really thought he did something with everything that he did (that sentence might have made sense but in my mind it did)

Sarah, Sarah, Sarah... Get this girl a therapist! Please because what the actual fuck. Can I just say that I know she's human and people make mistakes, she went through some really tough shit. But this bitch really cheated on John B with Topper dude, like John B is the only one that's acknowledged that they are 'married'. They were not broken up, John B said some hurtful ass shit to her and she said 'come find me when you wanna tell me the truth' or something like that... so you cheated and you told your ex that you were broken up.

Fuck Topper and his feelings but if you know that he can get white boy crazy, like girl why would u do this? Mans is OBSESSED, and he wants to talk shit about the pogues when he's the problem. Literally, burned John B's house to the ground like???

Anyways... I still stan her though bec poor bby was hurt and ended up pulling through.

Kie's mom really did try to be supportive but HER DAD!!! he really thought that this girl was being lied to and manipulated by the pogues. he boiled my blood with the way he spoke to JJ and just did not try to be understanding at all- with the way he said that he was a pogue so he knows what it is to lie and shit? So that just tells me that you're really no better than JJ and the others as a matter of fact you were worse even.

If I was Kie I would have been RAGINGG dude that was so wrong of her parents, I know she was pissed but the moment I saw that van I would've ran!

Poor JJ, he really felt like he wasn't good enough for Kie (I don't necessarily ship them but they were cute). He was so self-destructive I wanted to shake him through the screen and tell him how he is more than enough for Kiara.

The no love club!!! did we really think that was gonna last though? Like they swore off love yet they have feelings for each other ahhhh okay but Cleo and Pope >>>

JJ and Kie had MOMENTS and they were pretty cute

I LOVE JJ but I am a slut for Rafe, he ate this season idc

It's the way that at the end of the season everyone gave the pogues a standing ovation for the award they received (was it an award? I can't remember cause at that point I was in shock at how this was ending) when they ALL thought so lowly of them, fake ass bitches I swearrr

I feel like they could've ended the show perfectly fine there, maybe they could have added an episode where they show how the group is doing while they live their new lives, I am excited for season 4 but I just hope they don't ruin the vibes yk?

So those were my thoughts I probably left out a few that I can't think of right now but for now let me know what you think in the comments or message me and we can discuss :)

[nghtmarish]

@leagueofdccm ; homelander : you shouldn’t have even been there! three hundred & ninety prompts ; always accepting.

     𝐚  𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭  𝐨𝐟  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥  𝐭𝐫𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐭𝐨  𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞  𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞  𝐨𝐟  𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠,     everything  that  happened  at  herogasm  felt  like  it  was  haunting  her  and  she  still  couldn't  believe  that  hughie  had  been  so  complict  in  it  all.     how  many  times  had  she  said  that  hughie  was  harmless?     that  hughie  would  always  do  the  right  thing  and  wouldn't  let  butcher  drag  him  down  whatever  dark  path  that  man  was  hellbent  to  stay  on.     annie  still  couldn't  believe  that  he  was  taking  temp  v  like  it  was  fucking  asprin  and  she  still  couldn't  believe  that  he  would  be  so  calm  about  it  all.     she  had  only  gone  there  to  try  and  stop  them,  to  find  soldier  boy  like  she  had  been  told  to  do  and  try  to  make  sure  no  one  else  got  hurt.     but  it  had  taken  a  turn  for  the     𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐬𝐭     and  there  was  nothing  she  could've  done  to  stop  any  of  it.     all  she  could  do  now  was  keep  fighting,  exposing  vought's  lies  to  everyone  and  whilst  they  were  doing  their  best  to  discredit  her,  she  knew  that  they  couldn't  stop  her.     she  had  given  up  everything,  she  finally  felt  like  she  was  doing  the  right  thing  and  yet  she  still  felt  like  she  was  being  haunted  by  what  she  saw.     homelander  fighting  for  his  life  against  butcher  and  soldier  boy.     torn  between  her  want  to  do  the  right  thing  by  the  people  who  needed  and  wanting  to  help  the  man  she  loves.     she  had  told  mm  to  let  it  go  with  soldier  boy,  to  do  the  right  thing  by  the  injured  that  needed  his  help  and  yet  she  had  been     𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐳𝐞𝐧     in  her  own  choice.

     𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧  𝐧𝐨𝐰  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭  𝐮𝐧𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞  𝐢𝐟  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭  𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐢𝐜𝐞,     she  didn't  know  if  homelander  had  even  been  aware  she  was  there,  he  had  been  so  focused  on  the  fight  that  he  probably  hadn't  noticed  her  until  she  sent  a  light  blast  to  knock  soldier  boy  back  for  a  moment,  giving  him  an  opening  before  running  after  mm.     she  had  exposed  herself  in  a  way  that  was  likely  to  come  back  and  bite  her  later,  but  she  would  deal  with  it  if  that  happened.     but  after  she  had  kept  exposing  vought's  lies  and  them  covering  up  soldier  boy's  return,  she  hadn't  even  returned  to  tower  or  had  a  chance  to  speak  to  him.     until  kimiko  had  asked  her  to  get  her  a  dose  of  compound  v  and  as  much  as  a  part  of  her  knew  how     𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬     this  could  be,  she  was  going  to  do  right  by  her  friend.     annie  had  made  her  choice,  she  knew  she  was  doing  the  right  thing  by  leaving  the  seven  and  vought  behind,  but  why  did  she  feel  like  her  heart  was  breaking?     

     𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐤𝐧𝐞𝐰  𝐬𝐡𝐞  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐭𝐨  𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐞  𝐡𝐢𝐦.     he  would  take  her  going  against  vought  as  a  personal  attack.     they  had  always  been  fighting  on  opposite  sides  without  ever  really  acknowledging  it,  but  now  they  could  no  longer  deny  it.     she  couldn't  have  both,  freedom  from  vought  and  still  be  with  john.     it  just  wasn't  going  to  work  out  that  way  and  it  absolutely  made  her  feel  like  she  could  break  apart.     not  that  she  even  could  do  that  with  everything  going  on.     but  she  knew  when  she  got  a  chance,  she  would  fall  apart  and  would  have  to  just  pick  herself  up  again.     annie  didn't  know  if  she  would  get  another  chance  to  say  goodbye,  she  didn't  even  want  to  think  about  what     𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭     happen,  but  she  couldn't  just  walk  away  from  the  tower  without  knowing  that  he  was  okay.     she  had  the  perfect  excuse  of  collecting  the  last  of  things  to  anyone  else  who  wondered  why  she  was  here,  no  one  had  to  know  the  real  reason  she  had  risked  this  trip  and  she  just  hoped  that  this  wouldn't  be  a  big  mistake  that  she  would  come  to  regret.

     𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐡𝐢𝐦  𝐰𝐚𝐬  𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐬𝐭  𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭  𝐨𝐟  𝐚𝐥𝐥  𝐨𝐟  𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬,     but  in  all  her  searching  for  him,  it  had  just  made  the  anxiety  build.     not  just  because  she  had  stolen  compound  v  in  her  bag  and  she  finally  knew  how     𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐬     temp  v  was,  but  because  she  really  didn't  know  what  to  expect  when  she  saw  him  again.     was  he  mad?     probably.     had  they  hurt  him?     she  didn't  know,  even  if  she  had  seen  him  fly  off  and  get  away.     annie  didn't  even  know  if  he  was  going  to  let  her  just  walk  out  of  here,  he  was  always  unpredictable  and  she  imagined  with  everything  going  on,  he  was  probably  likely  to  be  even  more  so.     her  heart  was  racing  in  her  chest  when  she  finally  saw  him  and  it  was  whole  mix  of  emotions,  she  wasn't  even  sure  which  one  was  winning  out,  all  she  knew  that  she  just  felt  so  sad  because  this  never  going  to  work  for  them  if  they  were  fighting     𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭     each  other.

     𝐢𝐭  𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭  𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞  𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠  𝐟𝐨𝐫  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧  𝐭𝐨  𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞  𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭  𝐭𝐡𝐞  𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬  𝐚𝐭  𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐚𝐬𝐦,     she  had  to  constantly  remind  herself  to  stay  calm,  to  not  let  this  escalate  into  a  fight  because  she  didn't  want  to  fight  with  him.     but  emotions  were  close  to  the  surface  for  her  and  she  felt  like  she  was  just  cracking,  pulled  in  several  directions  by  her  own  head  and  heart.     shaking  her  head  as  he  spoke,  hand  coming  up  to  tuck  blonde  strands  of  her  hair  behind  her  ear,     "     i  was  only  there  because  i  was  looking  for  soldier  boy!     like  you  told  me  to  do     .     .     .     i  didn't  know  things  were  going  to  end  up  like  that,     "     she  never  could've  predicted  any  of  this,  she  had  known  more  than  she  let  on  because  of  details  that  hughie  had  told  her.     but  as  much  as  she  had  known  that  they  needed  to  stop  homelander,  she  knew  she  would     𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫     be  okay  with  letting  him  die.     it  really  was  the  most  difficult  thing  for  her  to  try  and  comprehend.     takking  a  deep  breath,  trying  to  keep  her  emotions  in  check  because  she  knew  if  she  started  crying,  she  wouldn't  stop,     "     i  just     .     .     .     i  couldn't  let     .     .     .     i  didn't  know  what  to  do.     they  could've  killed  you  and  i  wasn't  going  to  let  that  happen,     "     she  didn't  even  know  if  she  had  actually  done  a  much  to  help  him,  but  she  couldn't  ignore  that  feeling  of  guilt  that  she  could  and  should  have  done  a  lot  more.     she  definitely  knew  she  wasn't  helping  him  at  all  by  exposing  his  lies  about  soldier  boy  and  she  wasn't  going  to  stop  doing  what  she  was  doing  either.

     𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠  𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫  𝐚𝐭  𝐡𝐢𝐦  𝐚𝐬  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭  𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝  𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝  𝐢𝐧  𝐡𝐞𝐫  𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐭,     reminding  herself over  and  over  to  not  cry,  to  not  let  anyone  see  a  crack  just  like  maeve  had  once  told  her.     if  she  broke  now,  she  wouldn't  be  able  to  walk  away  because  she  would  let  him  just  pull  her  right  back  in.     she  had  to  stay  strong,  stand  by  what  she  was  doing  and  walk  away,  even  if  it  felt  like  the  hardest  thing  to  do,     "     i'm  not  going  to  be  coming  back.     i'm  done  with  all  the  lies  and  the  bullshit.     i  can't  keep  doing  this,  being  in  the  seven  and  acting  like  this  is  right,     "     she  couldn't  help  but  wonder  for  a  moment  if  he  could  hear  the  way  her  heart  was  racing,  her  body  filled  with  adrenaline  like  she  was  almost  in  fight  or  flight  mode,  but  she  didn't  even  know  what  she  wanted  to  do,     "     i  just     .     .     .     needed  to  see  you.     to  say  goodbye,     "     a  part  of  her  wanted  to  tell  him  that  she  even  though  she  was  leaving,  that  she  was  no  longer  a  part  of  the  seven,  that  she  was  now  actively  fighting  against  him,  she  still  was  hopelessly     𝐢𝐧  𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞     with  him  and  that  was  something  she  couldn't  ignore  or  turn  off.     but  she  didn't  know  what  good  it  would  do  either  of  them  right  now.

[my-toxic-alternative-reality]

Tina and I are no longer friends after I asked her for some space. I probably could've asked for space in a nicer way, but I just put some of her most recent transgressions out there. These amongst many others are what this post is about.

Tina used to play football, she says she was "one of the boys" and was super popular. She says she was super fit until she sustained an injury. She said she has not played football since that injury. At the time of the conversation, the injury was no longer present and was in fact a sprain from 2 years prior. Tina wanted to excuse her laziness and lack of discipline to work out on an injury. Her obsession with portraying herself as one of the boys was also very strange. Tina is clearly feminine, but seems to think that if you wear denim, you are masculine. I guarantee you that denim skirts that are a complete length of 6 inches are not masculine. I guarantee you that frilly tops without a bra do not make you masculine.

Tina wants to pretend that her obsession with boys is because she is "one of them" when in truth she wants them to be her pets. She has a boyfriend. We will call her boyfriend John. Tina and John are in a happy relationship for 2 years now. For timeline's sake, Tina stopped football at 17, I met her at 19 and she started dating John at 21. John has mostly male friends. All of which Tina requires to be her personal friends as well. When John is having boys night, she joins in. When John is going on a boys trip, she comes with. Tina is always in the middle controlling all the boys. And when she sees that there is a boy she can't control, she starts saying he's evil or gross, or that she hates him.

She has dated other people before John. Many people. She is very submissive and talks about how much she loves her partner while she's dating them, then immediately shits on them as soon as they break up. She loses control over them and instead of being mature and realizing that everyone is an individual with independent will, she begins to go off about how evil they are. She mars their name. She talks about how abusive they were. How she was a victim of SA and how they were mean to her. I used to believe her. But then her stories would change. And the trauma she claimed to have would be worse. It went from having her tit grabbed at 16 to kissing someone at 15 to having sex at 14. The name of the guy changed, his hair color, the country she was in, it was all a weak web of lies. She changed the story half a million times and often only after someone else opened up about their own trauma. No on is allowed to be more traumatized than Tina.

I chose not to tell Tina about my trauma. I chose not to tell her about the man who violated me, who made me small. Because it hurt too much to be told lies about how she has it worse. She never uses the word raped when describing her sexual assault, and I'll tell you why. Because SA isn't just penetration, and she want to claim penetration when what she experienced - also awful and undeserving to any living creature - was groping. She wanted to be more sick, more traumatized, more pitied than anyone else in the room. She needed to be the center of attention. I chose not to tell her anything, and that's when our friendship started dying.

Longest rant about Tina.

I had a friend, her name was not Tina, but she will be called Tina for this post. This will be a long post that will continue to grow whenever I remember something irritating about Tina, someone tells me something about Tina or she posts something that annoys me. I do not like Tina anymore but once considered her one of my closest friends. This is not a nice post. If you want to tell me to be nicer, don't bother.

Tina wants to be the main character. It is not enough for her to have a loving boyfriend and caring friends, she requires her friends to be her servants and her boyfriend's friends must also be obsessed with her. She has body issues, so sometimes when she's feeling particularly like a main character, she texted me to ask to come eat dinner at her place so that she would feel less bad about eating. She would probably feel less bad about eating if she ate more vegetables and didn't deep fry everything before coating it in mayo or butter.

Tina thinks she's anorexic. She is not. Even her two therapists told her this. She thinks she's anorexic because she wants to justify how fat she is by blaming it on restriction. Instead of accepting that she just eats shit and doesn't exercise, she wants to be pitied, like Tess Holiday or something. Tina was overweight when we were friends. In the last couple months she has become very obese and continues to put on weight. But she claims she's recovering from anorexia and is exercising so she needs to eat more. She does not.

This post will not make sense, and it will not be in order. It is for me.

[peakyblindersxx]

whiskey business - john shelby x reader (part 8 of ?)

gif by @thesoldiersminute can i send you a cake or something cause fuCk!!!!!!!!!!! he's beautiful

a/n: to everyone still reading this fic, my sweet angels, ily!! this fic is so near and dear to my heart and @stxdyblr-2k has just done such an amazing job with it i can't even thank her enough. as per the last part, this one is also mostly her, just me editing but i hope you guys love it as much as i did!!! don't worry, there's gonna be a lot more :) and i apologize for being not as active, i'm gonna try to get a couple of requests up that i'm really excited about this week tysm for being patient with me <3

love, abi xxx

read part one two three four five six seven | my masterlist

prompt: ada has some talking to do, and you're not about to deny her.

warnings: fluff, semi-angst, tommy being the cocky mf he is (let's be real, it's only acceptable cause he's so damn fine), john being cute and in love and jesus i am head over heels

tagging: @datewithgianni, @mayaslifeinabox, @deepdonutkid, @springsoulofengland, @lilymurphy03, @operation-spot

You had planned to go to Ada's after work, but she obviously had other ideas. She didn't even bother walking in and asking to speak to you; instead, choosing to bang on the window closest to your desk and yelling at you to "fucking hurry up!" Your boss opened the door for you expectantly, not offering you any protection; he was firmly in the Shelby's ever growing pocket and as long as he could go home to his children, his sickly wife and their six bed in the country, with a full time nurse and nanny, he had no interest in crossing Thomas.

"Ada, I was coming to see you after work, I swear."

"I know. I was going to let you but..." She trailed off. "We need to talk. I don't know what the fuck is going on with you. John said he'd seen you last night and you asked after me."

John had indeed seen you last night. It was strange waking up with him, used to leaving almost immediately after he was finished with you. Your small bed could barely comfortably fit you both, having to intertwine your limbs with John's to not fall off the edge. You had awoken to John pressing a kiss to your forehead before lazily trailing his fingers between your legs, waiting for you to open your eyes before settling between your thighs, tongue swirling around your clit, making you cum before sunrise.

"Do we have to do this in the street?" You practically begged, the shouting having attracted onlookers.

"I wanted to talk to you before anyone else in the family gets to you because I need you to be honest."

"Ada-"

"No, I'm doing you a favour here, so you fucking listen. Right now, between you and I, no bullshit. No tactics. No white lies. You have to tell me exactly what we're dealing with." She looked frantic, scared for some reason.

You nodded, walking her down the side street, careful not to link arms with her. You knew she was doing you a favour; this wasn't about forgiveness or friendship, much more was at stake here.

"To what extent was Thomas involved?"

That took you off guard. Ada read the confusion on your face and sighed impatiently, her subtle plea for you to keep up.

Shit. You remembered your conversation with John, how she thought this was her brother's way of pushing her out of the company.

"Don't spare my feelings. What did my brother say to you?"

"He said it was in our mutual interest that you didn't find out. He didn't care who John slept with but cared who you trusted so I had to trust him. He said there was no point in upsetting you over one of John's conquests who he'd tire of in a month."

"That all?"

"Pretty much, I didn't know Arthur knew. He never talked to me about it, did laugh at Thomas' digs now that I think on it-"

"Did you know Isaiah and Michael knew?"

"I thought they were aware but no one ever talked to me about it."

"Of course they wouldn't." She hissed, frustration causing a nerve on her neck to jump.

Ada and you had spoken for years about the rampant misogyny of her brothers and any men you two came into contact with. Although you were both far more reserved than you used to be as rebellious and adventurous thirteen year olds, you'd both grew increasingly angry at how you were treated. She'd long written off her brothers as womanisers, who saw women as purely sexual and entertaining, objectifying them. You both long despised how they dehumanised women. She was amazed that Thomas had attempted to settle down and managed a somewhat loving marriage, but resented him for his carelessness and need for power which inevitably killed his wife.

"Ada, I just want to say..." You licked your lip nervously, unsure of how to continue.

"You need to talk, Y/N. No bollocks."

"Before last night, he'd never been to mine or called. I always went to him."

The muscle in her jaw tensed.

"You slept with him last night then?" You met her question with silence and she rolled her eyes. "The second he said he saw you I knew you had, he wanted to tell me that he was going to continue seeing you and that he hoped I'd be able to accept it one day."

"We never intended to hurt you. It was meant to be fun at first, but now..." You cut yourself off with a sigh, unable to admit you'd fallen for her brother.

"Isn't fun for me. It's fucking embarrassing." She paused, lighting a cigarette, nervous to offer you one, conflicted within herself. She raised her eyebrow, prompting you to continue, the mannerism so similar to her brother’s.

"It should never have happened. I am never going to be able to fix this, I'm so fucking ashamed for doing this to you, Ada."

She sulked, silently drinking in your words.

"Obviously it's not going to be the same, yeah? I'm really fucking upset. I'm so fucked off with you but Poll's really worried about a coup. She thinks you're being used as blackmail against John to keep him on side with Tommy while he expands."

"Makes sense."

"You're part of a much bigger game, you know?"

You nodded. "Yeah, and I knew I would lose from the start. Fucking tragic, Ada."

"My brothers keep pushing, keep growing the business. They keep chasing this prize but I don't think it even exists."

"If it does, it isn't worth it if this shit is the cost. I didn't mean to play into his hands."

"You couldn't have known." She said with a shrug, " 'Siah thinks John loves you."

"He told me last night." Several times, this morning also. You would never tire of hearing him moan those words into your neck or being yelled from your front door as he left for the office.

"You love him, don't you?" She said bluntly, a statement more than a question, your face suddenly hot with embarrassment.

Everything you'd suppressed for months, everything that you'd hidden, every time you lied smiling, every knowing glance from a stranger, every degrading comment from under Thomas' breath.

"I do, an awful lot."

She pauses, relighting her cigarette, "The worst thing about the entire situation is it could've been fine if someone told me. I wouldn't have loved it, obviously, but-" Ada sighed, rubbing her temple with her free fingers.

"I thought you'd hate me."

"How could I? I'd be more angry that you'd drop your standards for my brother. Seriously? Him? Mate…."

"Come off it, I've always thought he was charming. He's funny, smart-"

"Don't gush over my brother, it's grim. I'm just so fucked off you all lied to me." She peered at you through her cigarette smoke. "If you love him and he loves you..." she pressed her lips together as she tensed her jaw, "I could get over it. If it'd make you both happy. But that's going to take a long time. A long time."

"Ada-"

"Look I have meetings and shit to sort, I have to run." She interjected, checking her wristwatch, adjusting the cap which sat atop her trendy short haircut. You caught her arm before she could turn away.

"Thank you. For understanding."

She shrugged you off, "I don't get it, I'd never do that to you. But you also don't get to choose who you're attracted to. I'm really hurt, but I do love you and John a lot. He mentioned that after last night you helped him, got him cleaned up. I have to believe that you both do love each other. So I have to believe that this is a good idea for you both and not stand in your way."

"I love you, Ada. Can we hang out soon, just us two?"

She shook her head. "I need some time, I'll be in touch, yeah?"

You nod, stretching out your pinky finger. She sighed and linked it with hers, as you'd done since you were children, a silent signal to each other after a fight that you still had the other's back.

"Right, I've got to get back to this meeting, Tom is getting done by Polly for nearly getting John killed. I need to be there in case one of the lads needs patching up."

"Your aunt has a nasty left hook, I'll give her that."

"She'll be pleased you think so, she wanted Tommy to slice you to bits for crossing me."

"Fuck’s sake, thanks for the warning, I'll keep my head down. Good luck with the meeting."

Ada nodded and you watched her walk away, a Blinder suddenly appearing by her side seemingly from nowhere. This city was crawling with them. They clambered into Ada's car as you watched the car disappear into the distance before walking back to work. Thankfully, with your head still attached to your shoulders.

*******

Ada arrived at Thomas' estate, following the swell of shouting voices to his exquisite library. It was eye roll worthy and typical Tommy to choose the location of his post-fuckup debrief to be where he had the best view of the gardens, river and rolling hills. She could bet he'd sit in a corner and stare at the view, zoning out their aunt's lecture.

An armed blinder she vaguely recognised opened the door. Thomas was making a statement today with the armed guards, she noted. Her brothers really were fucked up. Arthur was an alcoholic killer who couldn't understand that Thomas would betray them all eventually, Finn was letting the tokyo and the razor chasers that circled him distract him from keeping the family together, John was apparently in love with her best friend, and finally, Thomas nearly got Arthur and John murdered last night with his foolishness. At this point only herself and Polly were holding everyone together, keeping everything silently moving along.

The door opened, and she was the last to arrive, Polly glaring as she murmured an apology, standing next to Finn. His eyes were bloodshot, grey-purple smudges under his eyes, he'd obviously had a heavy night. The last thing the poor lad needed was Polly's shrill yelling and the blinding sun streaming through the large immaculately crafted windows, which he'd tried to block with the brim of his cap. John caught her eye, acknowledging his sister with a nod, which she returned with a small tight smile.

Ada couldn't bear to think about the reasoning behind her brother's smug interjections in between Polly's rant to Thomas who was listening wordlessly, smoking.

Y/N and John? It didn't make sense. They had a similar sense of humour, sure, but she was far too intelligent for him. He also had a swarm of children, while Y/N preferred a wild night out only staggering home at daybreak.

It made far more sense for Y/N to end up with Michael, or if it had to be a brother, Finn. They were younger, so had less responsibilities and commitments so they could keep up with her. But John? Of course she knew he was believed to be the Casanova of her brothers, he was kind, he was an excellent father, yet he could never keep anyone around long, usually John was chasing someone new after a month or so. That's why the revelation that John had been involved with her best friend for almost half a year had taken her completely by surprise. Maybe that was why she was open to them being together. That had to be it. This relationship was completely out of character for John; she needed to believe that he was serious about his feelings towards Y/N and wasn't going to fuck her over. Because if he did, John would be a dead man.

"I don't know why you're all bleating at me. Yeah, I overlooked some details in the planning of last night's meeting-"

"Such as warning us that they were really fucked off because you'd helped bomb their warehouse." John pointed out.

"What do you want me to do? Apologise? Grow up, John." Tommy snapped back.

"They had loaded guns against their heads, they deserve an apology." Ada interjected, John giving her an appreciative flash of smile. She did love her big brother. Despite the fact that she'd pretty much only been yelling at him for the past month, John never dismissed her feelings and only apologised. It was confusing to admit to herself, but when Isaiah told her that he was confident John loved Y/N, she felt a wave of relief. At least he cared about her; it was the bare minimum but the Shelbys were notorious for not even meeting the bare minimum for acceptable social interactions.

"They didn't fuckin’ get shot." Thomas stated, his voice matter of fact and condescending.

"Do you ever hear yourself speak?" Polly spit back at him. "They didn't get shot this time. But it was too fucking close."

"It won't happen again, Polly." Tommy sighed. "What else can I say? Sorry lads, take the weekend off?"

"It's a good start." Arthur countered, "You're also paying for the extension on my house and my wedding."

"Fuck’s sake Arthur I was joking. But fine. Sure."

"You can't buy your family off." Polly scoffed at him.

"Think of it as compensation, a settlement." Thomas coolly corrected his aunt. "What do you want, John? A fucking farm?"

John hesitates while Finn whispered suggestions to him, Ada meeting his stare, John raising a brow to her in question. She sighed and nodded her approval.

"You can pay off my mortgage Tom, give me the kids' birthdays off-"

"So you'd never come into work then?" Finn cut in, Ada elbowing him in the ribs. She usually enjoyed Finn's remarks but she knew where John was heading; she could barely breathe.

"Tom, you're also to leave Y/N completely alone. If you have a problem with her, you come to me about it." He said firmly.

Arthur and Tommy traded knowing looks, obviously more aware of the ins and outs of his relationship than Ada was.

"Also if you're paying for Arthur's wedding I want the equivalent in cash." He adds.

Tommy shrugged. "Whatever. As long as we can move past last night and focus on today's order of business."

John nodded, satisfied. He knew Tom wouldn't care, but just saying out loud that he was involved with Y/N and having his family aware was a relief. He hadn't realised until he finally admitted how stressful keeping his relationship a secret was. Now, he could stop worrying about Tommy interfering.

Polly rolled her eyes, lecturing the brothers on their lack of moral backbone to allow themselves to be bought off, but dismissed them. She caught Ada's arm in hers on their way out, pulling her far from earshot.

"So Y/N and John are together now?" She asked, her face firm and scowling.

"Polls, I talked with her, she's aware of what she's done. She apologised and meant it. What more can I ask for?"

"Her not to have fucked him in the first place."

"She said that. Look, Polls, they're happy right? John seems happy-"

"He always is when he gets a leg over."

"You know she looked after him last night? Fixed him up after the meeting."

"Meeting? It was a fucking set up." Polly hissed but her face had softened. "She cleaned him up?"

"Antiseptic, bandages and all."

Polly looked subtly impressed, although she'd never admit it. "He went to hers? Not yours?"

"He wanted to talk to her." Ada shrugs, "I saw her this morning and-"

"What do you mean? You bumped into her?"

"I went to her work." Ada admitted, her aunt shooting her an exasperated glare.

"Why do I bother? Nobody listens to me."

"I had to talk to her, I'm glad I did. She reckons she loves him, he told her last night that he loves her, so..."

"We are talking about John? Our John?"

"I know Polls, I'm as amazed as you."

Her aunt huffed, unimpressed. "Are you okay with it though?"

"I guess, I just want them to be happy. I've told them to give me time with it."

"She was a good friend growing up, but people change, sometimes for the better, often for the worse."

"Poll, it's Y/N; she's my best friend. At the end of the day, we'd do anything for each other."

"Sweet Ada, you're going to be so miserable if you keep letting people walk all over you." Polly said wisely, kissing her goodbye affectionately. "I hope you're right. If she makes you cry again I'll kill her myself."

"Thanks, Polls."

She knew her aunt wasn't joking.

[sly-merlin]

A busy birthday | j.suh

Requested : johnny + birthday dinner surprise

Genre : fluff

"Stop being a cry baby johnny."

Yuta said, shoving his hair back away from his face. Since the break of dawn, they had been practicing like bulls running after a red flag and ever since then, johnny had been moping around with disappointment painted over his face.

"I'm not being a cry baby yuta. I just asked if you all want to practice late at night. Simple." He replied and gulped down the remaining water from the disposable bottle. Yuta shook his head and snatching the empty bottle, crushed it from the middle before facing johnny,

"Just talk to her. It's not like we are allowed to go anywhere tonight. might as well spare yourself the trouble and confront her. Anyone c-

"But I never forget any important events and we being restricted gives me the right reason to be mad yuta. It's 9p.m and she didn't even care enough to throw a message at me. She can't be that busy."

Even the choreographer didn't scold them for the loudness. When Johnny's happy, he's the light in the room and when Johnny's whining, he takes down everyone with him. Such was the case right now.

"She has her responsibilities johnny. She's a teacher. Maybe she forgot while checking papers or something. Don't stretch this too much. You all are giving me a headache!" Taeil reprimanded, tiredly.

"So no one cares about how I feel? Seriously? Fine. We have another practice at 6 so I'll just sleep here i guess. Fuck you all."

Back facing the mirror, he slumped down. Silence hung in the air and no one dared to open their mouths. Johnny, despite being the rational one, couldn't rub the displeasure off his face. He felt heartbroken and ignored, feelings that might not matter after a few days but they had already sunk in enough for the moment to last a day or two.

All the boys exchanged knowing looks, mutely involving the choreographer as well. A mere nod from him was all it needed for yuta to drag a sulky johnny towards the door.

"What the fuck are you doing yuta. Mark you too!" Johnny narrowed his eyes, which they couldn't even see.

"Fuck off bitch. Go home because dorms are closed for you. If I received a single worried call from y/n, you would be dead! Take this phone and keys and run off." Shoving his stuff in his pajama pockets, yuta closed the door after him.

Johnny mumbled curses at him for being so callous but the partition didn't pass his words.

Cheerful shouts were the last thing he heard before he trudged for the main door.

*****

"Let's pray he reaches on time or y/n would chop me into small pieces." Yuta whined, returning to his position for the practice.

*****

He had denied and refused but the truth was that he felt hurt and despite being sad, he didn't want to end the day without seeing your face. The conflict was really painful and that's why he was carelessly removing his shoes at the threshold of the house, hoping he'd leave the dejection behind with the shoes.

What he didn't expect on entering was the blended aroma of the foods that he couldn't really point to. There was chicken, maybe chilli soup too? Or it could b-

"Happy birthday johnny suh."

A Giggle reverberated in the dim lit hallway as you wished him. With a small cake set on your palms, you looked at him with a gleam in the eye and with a smile outshining the colourful assortment of candles on the cake. He manually let out a chuckle but composed himself immediately after he realised that you must have been told by the boys.

"Blow the candles, birthday boy." You chirped.

He stared at the cake for a while, indecisive as to whether he should confront you or just forgive you without any question asked. He did both.

Blowing the candles, he glared at you and walked away, not before snatching the cake from your hands.

"Woah woah. That way dory!" You instructed, taking him by his arm. He was perplexed. Since when did you get so fast?

"I'm not hungry." He lied.

The food decorating the dining table was mouth watering, the taste in your hands was something he would've loved to die for. But he wanted to control himself, from snapping at your nonchalance and the temptation of lunging at the meal.

Before he could've turned away, you began lightening the scented candles on the table and his eyes finally took notice of your body. You were wearing nothing special, no makeup either. Johnny's simple black shirt swallowed your figure while your loose hair waved with your movements. It was indeed his favourite look on you.

"Come sit." You said.

"Who reminded you." His voice was surprisingly calmer than he had intended it to be.

"Who reminded me what?"

He closed his eyes for a moment. Taking a deep breath, he spoke again.

"Yo-you forget my birthday y/n."

"Who told you that?" Arms crossed, you challenged his words.

"You didn't call me the whole day." With defeat laced voice, he placed the cake back on the table. Watching you approach him, he took a conscious step back.

"You didn't even wish me in the morning," he whipped his head on the right to avoid you.

A hearty chuckle tore his gaze away from the wall and back to your face.

"You got up at 4:30 a.m Johnny. I didn't wish because that's how a surprise is supposed to work. I took a half day leave so i could prepare dinner for you. You are so busy these d-

Your rambling was cut off as you were sharply pulled by him.

"I thought you really forgot about me." Hugging you tighter, he spoke with a heavy throat.

"Aww you are such a baby John."

He kept swaying you for a few more moments and muttered multiple apologies. You basked in the warmth that he provided, happily, until you couldn't take it anymore.

"If you don't leave me right away, I'm going to cancel your midnight birthday gift John Suh."

**

I'll be johnnying until 14 feb! Happy johnnying everyone

[angelsdean]

Do you ever wonder how Dean would have told the New York story to Cas if Sam wasn't right here, hearing him? (because his hesitation at the end, before settling for the non-problematic answer...)

godd i don't know. i've been thinking abt this ask since you sent it on sunday and i'm really of two minds about it.

i feel like on the one hand, dean doesn't really think he was a victim of anything. like he's repressed and explained away a lot of the incident to make it seem like it was really no big deal in his mind. dean rewriting traumatic memories is nothing new and i can definitely see him doing so with this memory. sam also wasn't there, so he only knows whatever version of the story dean told him. (and bits from john, i guess, though i doubt john would really be sitting there recounting the whole thing for sam).

even if dean didn't specifically rewrite his memories though, dean to me has always felt like he views himself as a kid as older and more responsible than anyone else his age. and he holds himself to a different standard, different rules. sam says dean was WAY underage during this incident, that could mean underage for drinking (21) or underage for being a legal adult (18). my headcanon / guess is that dean was around 15. and like, if any of this happened to some other 15 yr old dean would see them as a child who was taken advantage of by adults. but for himself the rules are different. he sees himself as an adult, as older and more mature. he's had adult responsibilities for years by that point. he's seen and experienced more things than most kids his age. so he doesn't see himself as a kid that could be taken advantage of. he's hunter! he's killed things! he'd be able to handle some regular humans, is what i think his thought process would be like. so for him he can't and won't view what happened as this traumatic thing. he rationalizes and reframes the event to be what he needs it to be, no big deal. just regular teenage rebellion that ends with him getting busted by his dad. nothing more.

but i think recounting that story, having all of that resurface, and then coupled with what happens to claire, her nearly getting trafficked and being lied to and conned by adults, it triggers something in dean. like i said before, i think dean holds himself to a different standard, but seeing someone else of a similar age to him go through something like that would sound alarm bells as being Wrong and Bad. and so, him seeing what nearly happens to claire causes him to really confront what nearly happened to him at a similar age. and then he just. loses it. and kills all those men. as he should !!!!!! (literally those killings had nothing to do with the MOC. i think he would've done it anyway, even with no mark and i stand by that).

so, going back to your question, i think if none of this stuff with claire was happening and he was just randomly recounting the story to cas, he might still play it off as no big deal, just a little anecdote.

but if he were telling just cas this story in the midst of this episode i think as he's telling it he might start to think, oh shit, claire is around the same age and me and she's around these sketchy people and this is bad we need to find her now as he starts realizing what happened to him could've ended bad too. and maybe if it was just the two of them dean might have expressed some of that to cas like, "i didn't realize it at the time, i guess i downplayed it to protect myself but, yea that was a bad situation and it's a good thing john showed up when he did."

also i think when cas says "he saved you" to dean after he tells the story that moment is when dean starts really unraveling all this and realizing "shit that really could've been bad. and now claire is in a bad situation too and we need to save her."

[venushasvixens]

Ch. 4 Back to Beginnings -Life is But a Dream (Spike Spiegel x Reader)

 WARNING: mild sexual content 

- 

The cool air that snuck its way between the buildings blew into you harshly. You placed your hand over your mouth, silencing yourself. You clenched your jaws to keep yourself from chattering, afraid that every little thing was going to give your position away. Whoever you were chasing should've been hiding from you, not from them. 

You could hear running in the distance against the pavement, echoing in the alley. It grew closer and closer. Your heartbeat was in your throat, threatening to jump out. You could feel the soft pulse through your fingertips. You couldn't tell if it was from the cold, or from the adrenaline. Was it a bad time to admit you needed to pee? 

You were a horrible bounty hunter. You were too loud, you were clumsy with your gun, and body is just far too slow to give chase. Matter of fact, you looked rather ridiculous. But then again, everybody has to start somewhere, right? 

Home was far away from here, across the solar system. And as much as you were homesick, fuel for your small, dingy ship cost money, and that was something that you did not possessed at the moment. Not one single woolong. Maybe a few coins and a token from the local arcade. You needed this bounty, and you needed it now. 

The running grew louder and louder, the noise filling the alley. You squeezed the handle of your gun, afraid that your it was going to slip. Suddenly, the footsteps stopped. You never really prayed before, but maybe you should start now. One step echoed in the alley. Then another. And then another. Each one growing louder than the next. 

You placed your finger on the trigger gently, your hand surprisingly steady. You could see the outline of the woman that was now hunting you, her silhoutte growing bigger and bigger. Even though you were in the shadows of the alley, you definitely were sure that she could see you in the dark clear as day. Then she stopped, maybe a few feet in front of you. In an attempt to scare you, maybe elicit a reaction from you, she flipped out the barrel of her gun, spinning it, and popping it back in, over and over. 

"You're sure one shitty bounty hunter." she spoke. You could hear the smile in her voice, one of the last insults in your short life. You could also hear the age as well, scratchy and hoarse. "But what I will let you keep for the next minute is the smallest bit of nerve for trying to take me out." 

"You have nerve now to assume that I'll accept that." you blurted out without thinking. It may have been stupid, but do you have all the time in the world now to think it over? 

 She scoffed. " Oh, please. You're the one thinking that I'll give up myself that easily. And to a little girl with a gun." 

You swallowed. "You're not wrong, but I might surprise you." 

"Hiding in an alley waiting for the enemy to come to her? Yes, that is very surprising." she cackled, her hair flaying everywhere in the wind. Her arms outstretched, like a villain who just told the hero their heinous plan to take over the world. The dramatics certainly didn't work on you, but you sure thought it was funny. 

You start laughing as you got up and dusted yourself off. Not in a mocking tone, or in a conniving way. It was totally genuine. She noticed this, and immediately stopped laughing.  

"What"s so goddamn funny?" she ran up on you, her faces inches away from yours. You continued laughing, your head down. "Tell me, or I'll blow your fucking brains out!"

She stuck her gun underneath your chin, snarling and hurling threats at you. This still didn't stop your hysterics. "I-i think.." you couldn't even finish this sentence without a chuckle or too. "I-i honestly think.."

"You think? Spit. It. Out." she growled. 

You smiled. "I think.. you are sure one shitty criminal. Your barrel's been empty since your laughing fit a minute ago." 

Her face went blank as she looked at her gun, the barrel unloaded. 

 "Also all your bullets are on the ground behind you." You stated, your mouth into a fine line. She back up, accidentally stepping on few of the bullets. Her legs flew up, landing on her back. You could hear her start wincing and groaning.

"Seriously, how old is your gun?" You snatched her gun out of her hands, inspecting it. At a first glance, it could've been mistaken for a prop gun in an spaghetti western movie. "Wow, this is older than you. And you're ancient."

"Its my lucky gun. Its been with me since I first started in the game." She muttered. She struggled to pick herself up, but before she could, you swiped underneath her knees. She buckled down, stunned.

"I don't think I can let you off that easy. After all, I'm just a little girl with a gun, I don't know what I'm doing." You shrugged.

You aimed your gun at her leg and fired, the shot echoing. Your bounty gasped in shock, then started wailing in agonizing pain. Clutching her leg, she cried out. "Are you fucking insane?!"

"No, I'm just tired." You sighed. "Alright, let's pack it up, John Wayne."

- 

As you finished the story, Spike and Jet could not stop laughing. It wasn't that funny. But with at least with five shots in, it was hilarious. 

"John Wayne?!" Jet choked out, clutching his chest.

 "I'm not kidding."You smiled. "I thought I was a total badass." 

As you all tried to catch your breath, Spike waved over another round of shots. Jet noticed this, and put his hands up. 

"No more, Spike." he said, yawning and stretching. "I think its time we hit the hay." 

"Oh come on, Jet. At least stay for one more round." you lied, secretly wanting Jet to leave so you could have Spike all to yourself. It felt so odd, wanting someone you barely knew near you. Before today's events, you caught yourself multiple times delving into fantasies where you were confessing your love and affection to this mysterious man, and him returning just as much. He would place his hands on either sides of your face, stroking your cheek with his thumb. His eyes looking into yours,  And then, that classic fairy tale moment would come. A sweet, soft tender kiss, and the flying off into the sunset. Then you realize that you were just creating a version of him that you wanted, and that he probably wasn't thinking of you at all. 

And then there was moments where your mind wanders off, and you begin to think of all the ways he could absolutely destroy you. Emotionally and physically, but mainly physically. You imagined the way he would pin you against the wall, cornering you in.  Trailing his lips against your neck, biting and kissing that sensitive spot that made you go crazy. He would grab your hair, pulling your head back to face him. It wouldn't be harshly, but that he had full control of you. Spike would crash his lips against yours, desperately and passionately, like it was the last time he would ever kiss someone. 

Moaning and whining for more, you would try to snake your wrists from his grip to touch him.  But he would keep you pinned down, only torturing you more. 

"I don't think you deserve to touch me, " he would tease, pulling back from you. "Unless I hear you beg for it. Tell me how bad you want me to fuck you." 

After that, you would put a lid on it for the moment. You would feel the immediate need to drink some water, and an even greater need to take a cold shower. Its not that you didn't want these thoughts, its just you didn't want them to intrude on your mind when you were  conversing with THAT person. Who was now trying to get your attention because you were spacing off. You were spacing off so bad, you hadn't realized that Jet actually did leave, and it was just you and Spike. 

"Hey," he said, waving his head in front of you, "you okay?" 

You nodded, hoping that it wasn't obvious that you were thinking of Spike fucking you six ways to Sunday. "Yeah I'm good! Why you ask?" 

"You were just staring at me like I was a piece of meat." he replied, lighting another cigarette. 

"Well, I don't even like meat, so." you smirked, taking a sip from your drink. 

He raised his eyebrows. "From what I saw earlier at dinner, I know that is a fucking lie." 

You giggled, twirling the small stirring straw in your cup. A little tipsy, and more confident than you usually were, right now was the perfect time to flirt. 

"I do like a sausage every now and then, but, "you shrugged, looking anywhere other than Spike. That was a little too bold. You looked back at Spike, who was just smirking away. 

"I think I'll that hang in the air for just a minute." he replied. 

"I'm sorry, it was just there. I had to." you chuckled. 

You noticed the faintest bit of blush on Spike's face. It could've been from the amounts of drinks he had, or the teasing earlier. You were pretty sure that it was from the drinks. Little comments like those definitely didn't influence that one bit. Or did it? 

"How longer on you planning on staying here?" Spike asked. 

"Until I'm ready to go to bed, and I'm wired." you responded, a little discouraged if Spike was implying that it was time that all parties were going home. 

"No, I mean staying here on the planet. I'll be here until next week." he said. 

"Oh my bad." you replied, your face burning slightly in embarassment. "I think the same as you, until next week. "

"Ah, okay." Spike mumbled. He looked at the tabletop, you both sitting in complete silence. What he said next made your heart jump into your throat. 

"I was just wondering if you maybe wanted to do this next week? Dinner and drinks?" He asked, finishing his cigarette. "Right before we leave, I mean." 

As much as you wanted giggle like a school girl, you played it cool. "Mr. Spiegel, it sure does sounds like you're asking me on a date." 

Spike leaned his head on his hand. "And what if I am?"

"I'd say yes. I need a little fun every now and then." you stated, mirroring Spike.

You both sat there in silence for a little bit. You wanted to say something else, but the silence was doing just right for now. Talking to someone was nice, but just enjoying another person's presence? That felt just right. 

"Question?" you asked. 

"Answer." Spike replied. 

"What  do you do for fun, besides drinking and being cool?" you smiled. 

Spike chuckled. He sat there, thinking. "If you would like, I can show you." he finally said. 

"Show me. I'll follow you wherever you go." you said, taking that last shot. 

"Alright, follow my lead then." Spike said, getting up. He held his hand out to you. You  took it, jumping out of the booth. You staggered backwards, but Spike wrapped his arm around your shoulders to steady you

"Easy there." he grinned. You were a little too tipsy to care about Spike touching you, but it was gladly welcomed with open arms. 

"Let me show you were the real fun is." 

- 

The real fun was in a small jazz bar, with a single man on stage playing the sultry notes of a saxophone. You were prepared for anything, but you thought it was going to be a little bit more exciting than this. But if this is what Spike likes, then you will definitely respect that. 

He sat next you, his arm on his knee, leaning his head in his hand. He looked mellowed out, a blank expression. You were watching him out of the corner of your eye, seeing if his face would change. But it didn't. He kind of looked bored. Hoping you weren't making him bored, you cleared your throat. That got his attention. 

"Hmm?" he asked, his eyes still fixated on the saxophone player. 

"How often do you come here?" you asked him. 

He sighed, leaning back. "Man, I want to say every time I'm on Mars. I've been going to this place since I was younger. Its almost like a safe haven for me. Where do you think I get my good taste in music from?" 

You nodded, chuckling. "I get that." 

"Besides drinking and enjoying some good music," you continued, "what else do you like to do? I already told you my hobbies earlier at dinner, so I guess its your turn to spill." 

Spike leaned backwards, hands interlocked in the back of his head. "My hobbies." he thought. "I want to say make money, eat, and go to sleep." 

You smiled. "No, I'm serious. What do you like to do for fun?" 

"I'm serious too. Now that I think about it, I want to add on watching TV and practicing some punches, so I'm not too rusty." he replied. 

"Who do you practice punches on? Not on anyone on the Bebop, I hope." you said. 

"If I could, I would. Some of them really do know how to push my buttons." he muttered, sticking a cigarette in his mouth, but not lighting it. 

"I'm not pushing any buttons by interrogating you, am I?" you asked, leaning closer. 

"Of course not. I'm just answering some questions for a curious cat." Spike winked at you. 

Your heart felt like it was going to pop out of your chest, this man was so fucking fine. You bit down your lip, tapping your leg. You hope it wasn't too noticeable that Spike's flirting was taking a HUGE toll on you. You couldn't go back on to your thoughts from earlier, you can't right now. If you did, boy you were in for a treat back at your ship. 

The silence this time was a little different, like something was off. You were expecting the conversation to bounce back, but it didn't. As much as you wanted to initiate talking, you felt like you could be talking too much.  Spike was quiet, and he hadn't really changed positions for a hot minute. You now knew that when Spike got like this, he was thinking. His face would be expressionless, tapping his leg lazily, and just staring whatever direction he felt was necessary. During dinner, while you and Jet were talking, he would get quiet and travel off into his own little space. Now that it was you and Spike, you felt like you were intruding on something. 

You turned your focus back onto the music. Coursing their way into your ears, the deep notes felt like they were pulsing in your body. You still couldn't get over the air between you and Spike. It felt a little somber. 

"Hey," you said softly, touching his arm, "is everything okay?" 

Spike looked at you, his eyes turned down a little. He looked right back at him, waiting on a response. His eyes traveled from your eyes, down to your lips, and then to the rest of you. Was he checking you out? His lips formed a soft smile. 

"Yeah, I'm okay, " he said, "but besides that, did I ever tell you how nice you look tonight?" 

As flattered as you were, you were still concerned over Spike. "No, but thank you. Spike, seriously, you seem off. You were just fine and chatty earlier, but your vibe is definitely off." 

"I don't think we've been hanging out that much for you to see that." Spike shot back. 

"Yes, but I kind of got a knack for reading people." you replied, crossing your arms. You were a little taken aback by his sudden hostility, but you really didn't know what was going through Spike's mind. 

"If I said something that offended you, I-" you began, but Spike put his hand up to you. He shook his head, folding his hands together on his chin, placing his elbows on the table. 

Conflicted with pushing until he tells you and just shutting up, you sat there. You began to distract yourself with thoughts of getting another drink, what you were going to do when this "date" was over. 

"Alright, (y/n)," Spike spoke, his voice smooth, "do you want to know what's really  bugging me?"

You hesitated, anxious that you awoken something that would surely make this the last date. You nodded, turning to face Spike. 

"The past." he murmured, scooting closer to you. 

"The past? Why?" you asked quietly. 

"Why the past? Let's see." Spike stared into your eyes, his gaze unwavering. You looked back, but averted your eyes when you felt like you were overstepping. You already were overstepping with asking if he was okay, but there was something about eye contact that made you uncomfortable. 

"I've had a long, long past (y/n). I've made many stupid mistakes. And even though I know they are all in the past, they keep finding ways to ruin my present. I guess you can say I'm torturing myself with being here, since this was such a big place to hang when I was in-" Spike stopped abruptly, clamping his mouth shut. 

You nodded. "You don't have to say anything else. I understand." You gave him a small smile, placing your hand on his shoulder. Fuck comfort, you thought. Maybe it was just a human thing, to reach out to others when they're in pain, forgetting boundaries and anything that could hold back support. 

He looked at the placement of your hand, then back at your face. It seemed like eternity that you were both like this. He returned the smile, a silent thank you in the air.

 "Now I know that we already kind of drank a lot earlier, but how does another round sound?" you grinned.

 Spike's face lit up. "You read my mind, (y/n)." 

-  

You stumbled your way out of the bar, clinging onto Spike as he led you out onto the street. You were a giggling, drunk mess. You weren't rowdy or anything when you drank, but you sure were the comedian. Spike sobered up a little earlier, so he was a bit straighter than you were right now. 

"I would say, Spike," you slurred, "you sure are a pretty man." 

"Oh thank you. Now lets get you back home." Spike replied, just holding onto you while you tried to walk without falling over. 

"No no, you're not listening. Like you are really, really gorgeous. So gorgeous, you could put Valentine to shame." you laughed. 

Spike chuckled. "Okay, I'll take that." 

"Say thank you."

 "No." 

"Why?" 

"Cause." 

"Why?" 

Spike sighed. Now you were getting a little annoying, but he didn't want to get rid of you for the night just yet. Even if you were drunk and acting a fool, your company was something he needed for a long, long time.

 "Its a pretty night, don't you think, Spike?" you said, pointing out to the stars. 

Spike looked up, amusing you. "Sure." 

"No, say that it looks pretty. Or else you'll hurt her feelings." you smirked, giggling.

 "Whose feelings?" Spike asked genuinely, because you were definitely talking out of your ass. 

"I honestly don't know. But I do know that I'm tired as shit." you mumbled. 

Spike was tired too, but for some reason, he didn't want the night to end just yet. You haven't noticed this, but Spike was walking around buildings to see if you would follow him and not the way home. And your dumbass just did that. It was actually kind of funny, but it was a joke only for Spike. For a brief moment, you walked completely normal, and then the spiral started again.

 "Look miss, if you keep harassing me, I'm going to have to call the police on you, and I really don't want to do that." Spike teased, only adding more fuel to the fire.

 "Ahh, no, please don't do that." you replied sarcastically, putting your hands up. "I've been a good girl, I promise." You half smiled at Spike, and continued staggering to the port where your ships were. 

Spike place his hands in his pockets, trying his best not to reply to that last bit from you. But maybe he could let a little something slip. 

"From what I've seen, you've been a bad girl." Spike taunted. "A very, very bad girl." 

You turned around slowly, raising your eyebrows. Now it was your turn. 

"And what are you going to do about it?" you asked, sauntering over to Spike.

 "Give a guess." he said softly, his voice low and husky from the cigarette he just finished.

 You moved in closer slowly, finding your balance. You looked up at him, boldly running your hands up his chest. Spike flinched from your touch, but melted into it. You ran it all the way from his chest to his shoulders, and finally up to his face. Placing both hands on either side of Spike's cheeks, you brought his face down to yours gently. The smell of alcohol and smoke filled your nostrils, tingling your senses.

 You tilted your head, chuckling softly at how you had Spike wrapped around your finger at this moment. Spike closed the space between you both, taking into account how your hands framed his face so kindly, like you both have been doing this for forever.

 "Mr. Spiegel," you began, smiling, "you're not going to do a goddamn-"

A loud blast burst through the air, scaring you enough to become completely sober. Orange flames and clouds of smoke could be seen from behind the buildings. Alarms from the surrounding structures sounded off, people yelling and asking each other what the commotion was.

 "What the fuck?" you yelled as you watched the flames grow at a steady pace. You shielded your eyes, coughing. 

"Its from the port!" a person shouted. "There was an explosion at the port!" 

You and Spike looked at each other. Without thinking, you both bolted towards the chaotic scene. Every step brought more anxiety, not only for your ship, but for the Bebop. People ran around, to and from the port. You covered your mouth from the sudden inhalation of smoke, coughing more and more. As you came to a clearing, you could see the tumultuous scene before you. 

Your ship was burning, engulfed in a blaze of violently whipping flames. You shielded your face from the heat of your destroyed home, backing into Spike.

 "(y/n), we have to get away from here!" Spike shouted over the screams of panic surrounding you both. He wrapped his arms around you and started pulling you away, your feet dragging. 

You began to hyperventilate, unintentionally filling your lungs with smoke. Either from shock or the smoke, your vision blurred, and finally, slipping to black. 

- 

AN: Thank you all for sticking around. With these last two months, I've lost two jobs and gained one where I'm finally in a good place, financially and mentally, so that's good. I want to push out more fics for characters listed on here and my tumblr (same username as my Wattpad). Once again, thank you guys so much for enjoying this fic, and please, stay safe. 

[jjmaybanksblog]

Bruises- JJ Maybank

Request: hi❤ I was wondering if u could do the scene where the pogues see JJ's bruises?

Word count: 2,455

Warnings: mentions of physical and verbal abuse.

“We gotta be done before my scholarship interview in the morning.” Pope explained to you and Kie as he pulled up to the back of the Chateau. “Okay, well, we gotta focus.”

“It’s gonna be fine. We got John B and JJ inside the well, and me up top. You, Y/N, and Sarah will be outside transporting.” Pope recalled the plan, exiting the truck.

They headed to the back of his vehicle, opening the back to grab their supplies. “That tin can hold up to like, 200-300 pounds.”

“Thanks.” Kie praised him as she unlatched the hinge. 

“Uh, what for?”

“For stranding us. You know, making us make up.” Kie softly grinned as you stood next to her. 

“Seriously Pope, you’re like the super glue for this group.” You complimented. “What makes you think that was me?”

Before Kie could respond, lines full of lights turned on, confusing the trio. A loud buzzing sound leading them towards the backyard.

“What the hell?” 

You guys walked into the area, colored and festive lights hung everywhere. Inflatable palm trees chilled in the corner. JJ sat in a shiny new hot tub, popping a bottle of champagne open.

“JJ?” you asked as you walked up to the front of the hot tub. “What did you do, JJ” Pope asked in disbelief. 

“I got a jet going straight in my butt right now. Y’all should get in immediately, you hear me? Salud!” JJ cheered to no one as he poured out a glass, only to drink straight from the bottle.

“How much did this cost?” Pope asked, already knowing the answer.

“Uh… well, with the generator, the petrol, and oh, hey, express delivery… pretty much all of it, yeah.” JJ’s words were slurred, clearly intoxicated.

Pope's jaw fell open, “all of it?”

“Yeah, all of it.” JJ confirmed, pushing his sunglasses up. “You spent all the money in one day?”

“Yeah, burned a hole right through my pocket. But I mean like, come one guys, like, look at this! Finest in jet-based massage therapy, that’s what they told me.” JJ grinned at his actions. You furrowed your eyebrows at him, watching him take another drink from the bottle.

JJ noticed the look on your face, "Y/N, what? Can’t a man have a little luxury in his life? Come on,” he flung his sunglasses off, “all this scrimpin’ and scrapin’. I mean like… guys, we- you only live once, right? Enough of this emotional shit. Get in the Cat’s Ass. Come on.” 

“In the what?” Kie asked softly.

“In the Cat’s Ass. That’s what I named her.” JJ giggled to himself as he let the jets hit the back of his muscles. 

“Oh, hey, yo, I almost forgot.” He leaned over and pressed a button, a disco ball lighting up and spinning around.

“Yeah, that’s right, I know. Disco mode. That’s right baby!” He cheered in excitement.

“Are you kidding me? You could have paid for restitution!” Pope raised his voice. “Or literally given it to any charity!” Kie snapped. “Guys…” You started, seeing the pain in JJ’s eyes. 

“Or better yet you could’ve helped us buy supplies to get the rest of the gold out of the well!” Pope continued as JJ rubbed his eyes.

“Okay well you know what? I didn’t do that.” JJ yelled back as he stood up from his spot, revealing the new red and purple marks that littered his chest. You gasped, covering your mouth with your hands.

“I got a hot tub! For my friends. I got a hot tub for my friends. You know what? No, screw friends. I got a hot tub for my family!” JJ cried out, his voice wavering. “I got this for you.” He pointed to the champagne bottle that was already half empty.

Your eyes welled up with tears, noticing just how broken JJ Maybank was. “Guys, look what I did for you! Alright? Look at this!”

“JJ…” your voice cracked, “no, you, you both stop being emotional. It’s fine, okay?”

You marched up the steps of the hot tub, stopping at the first step, “come on Y/N, just get in.” You pulled the boy into your arms as you both cried against each other. His head rested on your stomach as you leaned your head down to rest on top of his.

“I just couldn’t do it.” JJ sobbed, his body shaking from the pain. He tightened his grip around your waist as you held him in your arms. One hand rubbed his shoulder while the other softly held onto the back of his head. 

“I can’t take him anymore!” He screamed into your chest, “I was gonna kill him.” 

“It’s okay baby, I got you. You’re safe with us.” you whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. Kie and Pope joined you on the steps, wrapping the boy in a group hug. “I just wanna do the right thing.” He admitted, letting out a heartbreaking sob.

“We know.” Kie reassured him, “we know.”

One by one the friends let go of him, "you guys can finish up whatever you were doing, I'll take care of him." JJ refused to let go of your waist as your fingers softly rubbed his scalp.

'I got this.' You mouthed, your friends nodding their heads in acknowledgment. The two walked away to continue their plans, you slowly lifted JJ's head up to look at you.

"Hey JJ, let's get you out of here, is that okay?" You spoke softly. He nodded his head, slowly releasing you. You held his hand as you eased him out of the hot tub and down the steps.

"Stay right here, I'm gonna grab a towel." JJ muttered a gentle 'okay'. Sniffing to clear his sinuses. Running inside the house, you yanked a towel off the bathroom rack and headed back outside.

You wrapped it around his waist before leading him inside by his hand. Entering the bedroom, you picked out a pair of boxers and shorts for him to change into. "Do you think you can change into this without my help?" You asked him, holding out the clothes.

JJ nodded his head as he stumbled across the hall into the bathroom. You stood on the outside of the door, harshly biting down on your tongue. You've never seen JJ so broken, so hurt, and you wished you had known he was dealing with this.

You felt guilt and anger for not knowing about this sooner. Whenever JJ appeared with a new bruise or cut, he always told her that he got into a brawl with a Kook. He lied to you for 7 years, you never caught on which killed you on the inside.

After a few minutes, JJ opened the door with the towel in his hands, and changed into dry clothes. "Can we go lay down?" He questioned, his words still slurred. "Yeah, of course hunny."

He walked into the bedroom and sighed. Without thinking he plopped himself onto the bed, letting out a cry of pain as the bed hit his bruises.

Biting your bottom lip you asked, "do you want me to get you an ice pack?" He nodded his head, resting his hands on his eyes. Heading into the kitchen, you grabbed an ice tray, dumping some ice cubes out into a ziplock bag.

You walked back into the room, shutting the door quietly. JJ praised you as you handed him the bag of ice. He placed it on the biggest bruise he had. "Can you- can you stay with me? And play with my hair because honestly it makes me feel safe." He admitted, not even processing what he was saying.

You sat down next to him, allowing him to rest his head in your lap. Your fingers found your way to his hair, letting them run through and massage his scalp. You sat in silence before he spoke up. "I really, really like you Y/N. Like Really." He emphasized the final 'really'.

"I really, really like you too JJ." You spoke the truth. "You know, these last few days have been crazy as fuck. You know you've been there. But the amount of times I almost lost you scared the shit out of me." He confessed, his hand reaching up to place itself on your leg.

"And-and when we almost got shot at Crains, my soul nearly left my body. I want to keep you safe." Your eyebrows furrowed together as you listened to his words.

"But I'm a fuck up and I don't wanna ruin your life. I mean my own dad doesn't want me, why would you?" His voice cracked. You reached your hand down towards his face to make him look at you.

"Hey, don't say that JJ. You have made my life so much better in every single way possible. You show you care about me. You let me smoke with you so we both forget about our problems together. You taught me more shit about fishing than I knew. You can call me the worst names possible, but it doesn't bother me because I do the same to you. It scares me how much I like you because in a snap you could be gone. Hell, when you got arrested I couldn't sleep the night of." You rambled on, realizing that maybe you had more than a silly crush on him. 

"You're cute when you ramble." He muttered, grinning at the sound of your laugh, yawning loudly afterwards. "You ready to sleep hun?" You asked, a nod answering the question. You shifted a bit, laying down as he rested his head on your chest. You kissed the side of his head, feeling his arm around your waist slowly tighten its grip.

______________♡_____________

You woke up, and checked the clock reading the time, '9:36'. Turning your head, you saw JJ still passed out, his snoring filling the room. Carefully getting out of the bed, you walked outside into the backyard and headed straight to the hammock. 

You sat alone peacefully, the smell of the waters filled the air, the sounds of birds chirping softly echoed, and the feeling of a cool breeze skimmed your tan skin, sunglasses covering your eyes from the sun. Footsteps came up from behind you, a figure plopped itself down next to you.

A groan emitted from JJ's mouth, shutting his eyes from the blinding sunlight. "How's the hangover?" You asked, handing over the sun glasses. "Feels like I have forks jammed in my head. Thanks." He grabbed the sunglasses, quickly putting them on.

"Do you remember anything from last night?" You asked, fiddling with your thumbs. "Uhhh, I remember almost falling into the bathtub when I was changing. And then- oh..." he trailed off remembering parts of the conversation you had.

The two sat in silence again as JJ rested his hand on your thigh. "I wish I could've stopped that from happening." You broke the silence, your voice wavering at the image in your head of his bruises.

JJ shook his head, "No, no you-you do enough for me. I feel like I don't deserve you." He whispered the last part. Your heart clenched at his confession. "JJ, you are the best part of my life." Your hand cupped his, looking at the boy who lifted up the sunglasses.

"I want to be able to take you on dates and treat you like a princess and buy you everything you could ever want. But I'm a Pogue, that could never happen." He clenched his jaw, knowing deep down you deserve someone who could give you anything you wanted.

"JJ, I'm literally a Pogue too. I don't care if you don't have money because guess what? I don't either. That doesn't change the fact that I love you. Just being with you makes me feel safe."

JJ's mouth slightly fell open, allowing those three words to sink in. You realized what you had said before it was too late. Your facial expressions matched his as you quickly looked down at your hands. They sat there, trying to process the words you just said.

Stress flooded through your body as you waited for his response, only to continue to sit in silence. "I know that was just kinda thrown at you but please just be my best friend right now and not the guy I just confessed my love to." You spoke up, killing the silence.

"I don't want to be your best friend." He started, instantly making your heart drop into your stomach. "What?" You whispered, continuing to crack your knuckles.

"I don't want to be your best friend. I want to be your boyfriend. I want to take you out on dates. I want to do those weird face masks with you. I want to do any cliché shit you want to do. I want to do anything and everything with you. I want you to be my girlfriend so whenever we go to parties I can be like, 'this is my girlfriend' and show you off. I want more than just being best friends." He said, reaching over with his hand to hold the bottom of your chin.

JJ looked down at your lips before glancing back up to your eyes. Your heart rate picked up, "kiss me." You assured him, turning to face him. Your eyes fluttered shut as you both leaned in, connecting your lips gently. JJ grinned into the passionate kiss, not being able to handle the butterflies in his stomach. 

You pulled back to catch your breaths, resting your foreheads against each other before you returned to your original position. He slung his arm around your shoulder, leaving you space to rest your head on his chest. You beamed as he used his index finger to rub up and down on your arm.

"Remember back in freshman year during homecoming, I asked you to dance with me to 'The Night We Met'?" JJ tilted his head down towards you, locking eyes. You nodded your head in response. "John B and Pope hyped me up for at least an hour to encourage me to ask you. And when you had your head on my chest and I just held you, it felt like we were the only two people alive. And I loved that feeling, I don't want it to ever go away." 

Your smile got wider, remembering the moment as if it were yesterday. "It won't." He pressed a kiss to the top of your head before falling back into a comfortable silence.

"Just making sure... we are dating right?" JJ spoke up earning a chuckle from you. "Yes. Yes we are."

[echo-three-one]

Chapter 38

THE ROAD SO FAR

The EIGHT-Thirty Appointment

John 'Soap' MacTavish

London, UK

Following the events of Shepherd's surrender to authorities, the members of Task Force 141 who went rogue in pursuit of him had been exonerated from treason. This meant that from then on, life would be a little more 'normal'. No more hiding in public, no more lack of equipment, no more secret hiding areas.

This prompted Laswell to recreate the task force she once poured her heart on, with a few changes to its jurisdiction. With Ghost, Roach and Alexandra still recovering, the remaining members were invited to celebrate their success.

"So John, now that 141 is back your main focus will be Nero. Do you want the reassigned members back?" Laswell asked Price while they exited the building. Soap overheard this because he thought he was the John being called.

"If it's still okay and not much of a hassle, then yes." Price replied.

"What about Kyle?" Laswell added.

"No. Not yet. Just keep an eye on him." Price mused and turned to Soap, who quickly turned to focus back on Alex as he pushed his wheelchair.

"Excuse me, Captain Price. Can we talk for a moment?" Samantha interrupted as they stopped on their tracks. Alex turned out of curiosity, wondering what matter they were discussing.

"Hey hey hey. What was that about?" Alex asked Soap and France, who continued walking. Laswell turned to the next right as she already finished her conversation with Price, waving at Alex and the rest of the 141.

Soap chuckled at the CIA. This was about Samantha's surprise for him and he shouldn't spoil it.

"Well, with 141 back maybe she just wanted to know where she will be now. Nero no longer needs the IP Address and she's been through a lot." France reasoned, making Alex frown.

"You know… I want her safe and all but I also want her within my reach. I've lost her far too many times already. I'm not going to lose her again." Alex grumbled making Soap and France look at each other, their faces were worried at their sorry excuse.

"I think Samantha feels the same way too. Maybe she's bargaining for staying at 141." Soap lied, making France question him quietly.

"You know what, Alex? Don't overthink this." Soap tapped his shoulders reassuringly.

"Overthink what?" Samantha inserted. They fell quiet and Samantha slowly asked Soap to let her push Alex as they moved forward, Samantha being excited of what's next.

"Well, we did a great job. I guess." Soap quietly commented sarcastically, earning a soft elbow from France.

"Ow!" he exaggerated and turned to France, his face looked bewildered.

"Way to go, John." She sneered and followed the two on their way to their appointment, riding Soap's trusty jeep.

The drive to the surprise area consisted of mostly Soap and Francine acting like couples while they drove. Soap could see the two murmuring at each other whenever Soap would argue with France on whatever's going on in the road.

"I always wanted to try out some London restaurants." she mused, looking at the place they just passed by.

"Yeah? I could see you as the fancy kind." he chuckled at his guess.

"What does that mean?" France gave him a suspicious glare. Soap looked at her, feigning surrender.

"I just said it as is. You're the kind of person who would want fancy stuff." He explained, focusing back on the road.

"I-"

"Come on. You don't have to read everything I say between the lines. Sometimes, I'm just a simple man" he whined and Alex and Samantha burst out laughing, causing the two to be quiet.

"Are you sure there's nothing going on with you two?" Samantha asked, making the silence a little bit more awkward.

Soap carefully rolled his eyes toward Francine, who was actually looking down and blushing. He really had no definitive stance on whatever's going on between them, and if you ask him, he'd love to assume that they're already together. But he remembered that he told her that he'll be patient, and that's the only thing that's hindering him from taking her to the next level.

"Well…" Francine croaked, her voice was shaky and Soap was actually worried that she was already under pressure.

"We're here." Soap interrupted, wishing he did the right thing. Alex quickly looked outside to see where they actually were.

"What is this place, Soap? Where did you bring us?" Alex asked and Soap just nodded.

"I'll let your girl fill in everything for you. This was her idea after all and we're here to help her out." Soap replied as he assisted him to his wheelchair and watched the two enter the establishment.

He then knocked on Samantha's door as she was still out of focus.

"There's a coffee shop across the street, we could wait there until they finish." He invited her for another coffee date. Hopefully this time, there would be no more emp phone wielding persons to interrupt it.

"About Samantha's question…" She muttered.

"Don't pressure yourself about it. You actually owe me for saving you, by the way." He chuckled, already opening her door.

France slowly stepped down the vehicle and turned to Soap, her head looked up to his face.

"Look John. There's no other reason I can think of that would make you wait anymore. I really enjoy your company, your personality, and I'm curious about everything else about you. So, if you've been waiting all this time ever since that night, my answer is that I'm ready." She smiled, and John's eyes widened at the sight of her. The message made him hug her tight, lift her up and spin her around briefly while she giggled at the feeling.

"Wow. You don't know how much you made my day, France!" he sighed as he slowly set her down and closed the door and made their way to the coffee shop.

"I missed these so much!" France happily chewed on a slice of blueberry cheesecake, with a few crumbs stuck on the edge of her mouth. Soap smiled as she watched her enjoy the simple things in life, a thing he was always looking for in women.

Most of his dating life were his parents setting him up on business dates and most women there were far too serious. They looked like they haven't enjoyed anything in years. Some of them admittedly loved to have fun, but their idea of fun was far too complicated. Like expensive travels and luxurious shopping sprees, none of them piqued Soap's interest.

However, Francine was the first one who begged to differ. It's like every great idea in John's activity book is enjoyable for her. Simple things such as Netflix, Cinemas and even this coffee shop date, made her smile.

"What's funny?" Francine asked as she noticed the odd smile on his face.

"Oh nothing… you just looked cute eating that whole thing. It makes me want to buy a whole cake and watch you smile and eat that all day." he mused, imagining how things would've been if they weren't in public. He could've been tasting that cake from her mouth already.

He quickly grabbed a tissue and wiped off the crumbs as Francine blushed in embarrassment.

"I'm sorry. I didn't notice it was there." she blushed shyly and looked down.

"Nah… why apologize. I was thinking you were hinting at me to kiss you. Like what most movies and cliché shows would mean." He scoffed and sipped on his coffee.

"Ha ha. Well you could try. As if I'd let you." She smiled bravely, but Soap could see her weakness behind that smile. She's raising her guard up again, and it's always like that when people are around.

"Wow. Umm that went differently." Soap commented, attempting to let France open up. This has been a common trend with her lately, toughening up when people are around but when they're alone, she's still strict but less tense.

"I'm sorry. It's just-" She hesitated and turned to the window.

"Say, how long would it take for them to finish?" She asked. Soap also turned to the building and shrugged.

"I don't know. Honestly, I'm excited for him. They make the best prosthetics around here and it'd make Alex's life easier. It'll look and weigh and bend like an actual leg." he said proudly as he turned to France who was looking at him weirdly.

"What?" he asked as he checked his phone which just beeped.

"Actually, they're almost done. And they're asking for an order. I'll just go get some for them, you stay here." He added, holding the thought, wiping his face and proceeded to the counter.

The reformed Task Force 141 would soon be back in business as papers were already approved by the board. They'll be situating themselves on American soil as their previous base was compromised by the traitorous General.

As for their last day on English soil, the rest of the team stayed in a penthouse condominium unit owned by the MacTavishes.

"Wow. This is top class!" Samantha mused as Alex plopped himself on the couch, his new leg quickly rested on the table. He's been in it for only a few hours but he already got the hang of it.

Samantha shot a glare at Alex's actions to which he shrugged on, prompting Soap to reply.

"Don't worry Samantha, make yourselves at home. We don't use this place anyway so help yourselves out. I promise it'll be fine." he eased as Samantha slowly plopped down beside him as Alex's arm rested on her shoulders. Soap actually wondered if he could do that to her too, get comfortable, open up, just normal stuff.

"I'll go get tea." he quickly said to himself as his imagination got the best of him as he walked to the kitchen. France quickly followed him to help out.

"Fancy place you got here, John. I wonder how many girls you've brought in here." She mused standing in front of him, helping with the teacups. Soap eyed her for a second and replied.

"Honestly, I can't count. I used to stay here when I studied and that was years ago." he replied as seriously as possible, looking at the changes on her face. She's actually jealous.

"Yeah. Figures. I saw your photos from earlier years. It was no doubt you'd have a lot of women over." She chuckled, nervously at it. Soap saw through her as she started to get curious about his life. A sign that she's ready to stop lowering her guard. Soap on the other hand, wanted her to feel special. Asking her out as soon as possible would make him come out as a desperate one, so he planned to do it the long traditional way. Which he actually despised, he would want to hug her so tight right now and it was already killing him.

"What about you? How many different rooms did you wake up to already?" he asked, changing the subject as she was already starting to feel bad about her question.

"Me?! Only a few. And most of them were owned by you. I've been very serious about my life choices that I never let myself loose." she sighed as Soap raised an eyebrow.

"Let loose? Like going out to parties?" He added.

"Yes. But broader. Like letting myself loose. I've always followed the path I wanted to be in, not letting any distractions bother me." she explained, blushing at it like it's a secret she was too shy to tell. Soap on the other hand, didn't quite get it.

"So you mean…" He tilted his head.

"Yes. Since birth, I never had a boyfriend." she looked down in embarrassment for the second time today.

Soap gulped. He didn't actually know how to respond to her statement. Sure he wanted to be the first one, but now wasn't the time. It would feel forced. And he wasn't a fan of forced relationships.

The kettle whistled and the two of them quickly responded to it as they both reached out for it, their hands met just by the handle.

"I'll take care of this one." She said as Soap slowly let go of her soft hands and watched her pour it on, carrying it to Samantha and Alex who were already giggling through a romcom.

"Way to go, John." he muttered to himself with a sigh as he ran his hand on his hair.

The day actually felt worse as France continued to remain quiet towards Soap as she invested herself on the television, third wheeling on Alex and Samantha.

Soap pondered about the words he chose to say to her and those he didn't over a steamy shower.

With the place having only two bedrooms, it was inevitable that France would sleep beside him but he also considered sleeping on the couch to respect her privacy or something like that.

As soon as he exited the bathroom, he saw France already tucked on her side of the bed, scrolling through her phone.

"Hey there." he muttered as she rolled her eyes to him and back to her phone.

"Hey." she said nonchalantly, her eyes dead focused on her screen. Soap quickly grabbed his nighttime clothes and slipped them on.

"Are you in any way excited for tomorrow?" he asked, trying to keep her from interacting with him.

"Yeah. A little." she said as she turned to him and smiled.

"Listen, about earlier today, in the kitchen..." he said.

"I'm not mad, John. I just wanted to say it out there so you could understand me."

"Tell me what you feel."

"Embarrassed."

"Why?"

"Because I looked like a fool earlier. When I told you I was ready and now I feel that you're the one who isn't. You told me you would wait but-" Soap placed his hand on her face, gently touching her cheek.

"France. You don't have to worry. You're still the one I'm thinking about every second. I just… wanted to do this the slow and steady way, where I would show off how worthy I am for you. I want you to enjoy the whole John MacTavish Experience." he smiled and she slowly turned her frown upside down.

Soap wanted to take a picture of that smile and plaster it all around the room as his heart started to pound like crazy, his face unknowingly moving closer to hers. They both started to close their eyes as they let their lips do the talking, but in a quiet and intimate way. Soap felt France's greed for his kiss as she slowly learned how to beg for more of him. It was true that she had no experience on these things but something told him that she's starting to learn some tricks herself.

Soap didn't hesitate to retaliate as she released a soft groan, a sign of her being content as her hands slowly grazed his arms, her thumb softly pressed his biceps, digging deeper as their tongues clashed. After a few more seconds, they both broke their kiss as they gasped for air.

"Yeah. Go sleep on the floor before we do something stupid." She giggled and Soap nodded in agreement as they quickly shuffled about, set their beds and called it a night.

Next Chapter - The SEVEN Inch Wound

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