#oc: tennessee williams fitzgerald

[muttakutagawa]

also

🍼 + fitzelda

for stray cats verse, have a Charlotte for your troubles. she's been waiting for your company after all. just make sure to close the door behind you :)

her ability, Yellow Wallpaper, works as follows:

When enclosed in a room with another person, it allows Charlotte to manifest the target’s greatest desire in the form of an illusion.

This illusion ends if the “seal” of the room is broken.

Works best with a singular target, as multiple targets make for more difficult to maintain illusions that may waver and cause the truth to become obvious.

but lets take a look into an alternative timeline, the universe of slaughterhouse two

maybe in this universe things went a little better. or maybe it just looks that way through the glass

Tennessee's Glass Menagerie is fairly straightforward in comparison, it just animates glass figures. they have tobe preexisting sculptures and if broken he can't control them anymore, but the shape doesnt matter, he can equally animate glass figures of objects people or animals

Send me 🍼 + a ship and I’ll draw/make a fan-child

[transienturl]

Q: How much do I know about sports off the top of my head? I’m bored, so let’s find out.

NFL:

NFC West (one of the strongest divisions ever):

Seattle Seahawks. Key (and less-key) players: Russell Wilson (QB), DK Metcalf (WR), Tyler Lockett (WR), Freddie Swain (WR), Greg Olsen (TE), Colby Parkinson (TE), Damien Lewis (G), Duane Brown (T), Ethan Pocic (C, I think?), Chris Carson (RB), Rashaad Penny (RB), Travis Homer (RB), Michael Dickson (P), help what’s the kicker’s name, Jamal Adams (S), Quandre Diggs (S), Bobby Wagner (LB), KJ Wright (LB), Jordyn Brooks (LB), Poona Ford (DI), Jarran Reed (defensive... line somewhere), Shaquill Griffon (CB), Quinton Jefferson (CB), Tre Flowers (CB), Benson Mayowa (DE), Carlos Dunlap (DE), Alton Robinson (DE), Shaquem Griffon (DE), god I can’t remember the new slot corner but he’s pretty good I think. Coach: Pete Carroll. OC: Brian Schottenheimer. DC: Ken Norton, Jr. GM: John Schneider. Owner: Jody Allen. Notes: Every game is close. Used to always run, but this year always throws. Quarterback is basically magic. Defense is severely lacking. My home team, obviously.

San Francisco 49ers. Key players: Jimmy Garoppolo (QB), George Kittle (TE), many fast running backs, Raheem Mostert is one of them, Trent Williams (T), Richard Sherman (CB), Nick Bosa (DE). Coach: Kyle Shanahan. Notes: Running game scheme is a work of staggering genius. Best player is a tight end for some reason. Went to the Super Bowl last year.

Arizona Cardinals. Key players: Kyler Murray (QB), Larry Fitzgerald (WR), DeAndre Hopkins (WR), Christian Kirk (WR), Budda Baker (S), Patrick Peterson (CB). Coach: Kliff Kingsbury. Notes: Runs many wide receivers, in scheme Kingsbury got from coaching college. Used to be bad, but getting better each year. Kyler is very small.

Los Angeles Rams. Key players: Jared Goff (QB), Cooper Kupp (WR), Andrew Whitworth (T), Darrell Henderson (RB), Aaron Donald (DI), Johnny Hekker (P). Coach: Sean McVay. DC: Used to be Wade Phillips, but not anymore. Notes: Runs a lot of plays from the same formation. Coach is very smart. Made the Super Bowl two years ago. Best player is a defensive tackle, for some reason.

NFC East (the worst division in NFL history):

New York Giants. Key players: Daniel Jones (QB), Saquon Barkley (RB). Coach: Joe, uh... Douglas. GM: Dave Gettleman. Notes: Spent a huge amount of draft capital on players the numbers said weren’t worth it. Seems accurate.

Philadelphia Eagles. Key players: Carson Wentz (QB), Jalen Hurts (backup QB), literally everyone else is injured. Oh, Jason Peters (T). Coach: Doug Peterson. GM: Howie Roseman. Notes: Everyone is injured. Everyone. Went to the Super Bowl 3 years ago and won with their backup QB.

Dallas Cowboys. Key players: Dak Prescott (QB, injured), Andy Dalton (backup QB, injured), No one of note (third-string QB), Amari Cooper (WR), CeeDee Lamb (WR), Ezekiel Elliott (RB), Leighton Vander Esch (LB), Greg Zuerlein (K), I could probably name more if I tried hard enough. Coach: Mike McCarthy. GM: Jerry Jones. Owner: Also Jerry Jones. Notes: Every year they have good players and lose anyway. Paid their running back instead of their quarterback. Also, now they have no healthy quarterback.

Washington [used to have a racist name]. Key players: Dwayne Haskins (benched QB), Alex Smith (QB... whose leg does not work), Kyle Allen (QB), Terry McLaurin (WR), Chase Young (DE), Montez Sweat (DE). Coach: Ron Rivera. Owner: Dan Snyder, who is the worst human being in the NFL, and that is saying a lot. Notes: No one cares about the football, Dan Snyder should be in jail. Also, Ron Rivera has cancer and Alex Smith’s leg injury almost killed him, so those guys deserve better.

NFC North:

Detroit Lions. Key Players: Matthew Stafford (QB), um, I should remember some more. Jeff Okudah (CB). Coach: Matt Patricia. Notes: Stafford deserves better. Patricia keeps signing ex-Patriots players, and it doesn’t work, presumably because the good ones are current-Patriots-players.

Minnesota Vikings. Key players: Kirk Cousins (QB), Adam Thielen (WR), Justin Jefferson (WR), Dalvin Cook (RB), many good defensive players whose names I don’t know. Coach: Mike Zimmer. Notes: Historically a good defense and just missing a competent QB. Paid a lot for an average QB; defense sucks now for some reason. Also, runs a lot.

Chicago Bears. Key Players: Mitchell Trubisky (QB), Nick Foles (QB), Allen Robinson (WR), Khalil Mack (DE). Coach: Matt Nagy. Notes: Has been wasting great defensive performances with poor to average quarterback play since World War II.

Green Bay Packers. Key Players: Aaron Rodgers (QB), Davante Adams (WR), Allan Lazard (WR), Aaron Jones (RB), Jamaal Williams (RB), Robert Tonyan (TE), David Bakhtiari (T), Za’Darius Smith (DE), Preston Smith (DE). Coach: Matt LaFleur. GM: Brian Gutekunst. Owner: “The fans.” Notes: Has started a hall-of-famer at quarterback every season since before you were born. Winning big but the analytics say they’re getting a bit lucky lately.

NFC South:

Atlanta Falcons. Key players: Matt Ryan (QB), Julio Jones (WR), I forgot the new WR’s name but he looks legit, Todd Gurley (RB). Coach that was recently fired: Dan Quinn. Notes: Have become known for inexplicably blowing enormous leads late in games. It’s quite funny, at this point.

New Orleans Saints. Key players: Drew Brees (QB), Michael Thomas (WR), Alvin Kamara (RB), Taysom Hill (listed as backup QB but just kinda does weird shit on offense), Jameis Winston (backup QB), Cam Jordan (DE), I should remember the cornerback’s name. Coach: Sean Payton. Notes: Known for having tons of talent every year, salary cap be damned, and then losing in heartbreaking fashion in the playoffs. Brees is getting old.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers. Key players: Tom Brady (QB), Mike Evans (WR), Chris Godwin (WR), this one WR who can go eat shit, Rob Gronkowski (TE), Antoine Winfield Jr (S), Vita Vea (DI). Coach: Bruce Arians. Notes: Signed Tom Brady. It’s working pretty well. Defense is top-tier. The most balanced team.

god, who is the other NFC south team, uh...  hold on, lemme get back to you.

AFC North:

Baltimore Ravens

Pittsburgh Steelers

Cleveland Browns

um... Cincinnati Bengals? Maybe?

AFC East:

New York Jets

New England Patriots

Miami Dolphins

Buffalo Bills

AFC South:

Houston Texans

Jacksonville Jaguars

Tennessee Titans

uhh... Indianapolis Colts.

AFC West:

Denver Broncos

Kansas City (I think this name should be changed too, honestly)

Las Vegas Raiders

I guess this must be the Los Angeles Chargers?

Oh, so the other NFC South team is the Carolina Panthers. Of course. Key players: Teddy Bridgewater (QB), Christian McCaffrey (RB and also arguably their best receiver), Yetur Gross-Matos (DE). Coach: Matt Rhule. Notes: Rebuilding their team this year, but quietly doing pretty well, considering.

Alright, I’m gonna stop there. Didn’t even get to the other half of the NFL, let alone started to try and list NBA/MLB/NHL teams, which would have gone extremely poorly. Story for another day.

Also, uh, yeah, this is a normal amount to know about football as someone who doesn’t watch football, oooobviously...

[junker-town]

Building Jon Gruden’s Tennessee the best circa-2008 NFL coaching staff

You want Gruden? Why not go all in on the best NFL coaching staff money could buy nearly a decade ago?

Jon Gruden has not coached a football team since 2008. That year, his Tampa Bay Buccaneers went 9-7, finished third in their division, and missed out on the playoffs.

It was also the year Tennessee parted with long-time coach Phil Fulmer.

In the post-Fulmer era, the Tennessee job has opened four times, including right now.

Every time, Gruden is heavily linked to the job.

2008: Gruden says taking Tennessee job isn't in his future, by ESPN.

2010: Jon Gruden turns down Tennessee's advances, by the Sporting News.

2012: Jon Gruden tells Vols he's not interested in coaching position, by CBS Sports. Gruden's agent calls the entire Gruden-to-Vols rumor-industrial complex "just a fantasy world."

This time is no different.

Respected Vols writer John Brice reported the Vols have more of a chance now than they ever have before. And Stephen Hargis of the Chattanooga Times Free Press added Gruden’s put out some feelers to potential staff members.

"Jon Gruden is reaching out to folks that he knows and trusts to find out & gauge their interest in joining a potential staff to take over at Tennessee" - @StephenHargis #Grumors http://pic.twitter.com/c0mlsz3eJ4

— Paul Finebaum (@finebaum) November 15, 2017

Reports to the contrary persist, but let’s be positive here.

So when it comes to building a staff, I’ve done the work for Jon.

If the Vols are so hellbent on turning the clock back to 2008 NFL retreads, you might as well go all in with a whole staff. Below is a list of names.

The one rule:

We’re ignoring what these coaches have done since 2008.

Offensive coordinator

Lane Kiffin, recently fired Oakland Raiders head coach

A good spot to place a 2008 up-and-comer here, and a good spot for someone who needs his first second chance. We’d have two former Raiders head coaches on staff (always a plus), and if something disadvantageous were to happen to Gruden, we could promote Kiffin to interim, no problem. Will surely follow all NCAA rules in Knoxville and stick around for a while.

Photo by Joe Murphy/Getty Images

(Actual current job: FAU head coach and social media innovator.)

Running backs coach

Jim Skipper, Carolina Panthers

The Panthers had two running backs in 2008’s top 10 of yards per rushing attempt. DeAngelo Williams and Jonathan Stewart were at the beginning of their powerful backfield tandem. I’ll take their tutor to coach up the likes of John Kelly (should he return to school next season) and Ty Chandler (who already looks quite promising).

(Actual current job: Skipper left the Panthers and did work in Tennessee, for the Titans, before returning to the Panthers.)

Wide receivers coach

Mike Miller, Arizona Cardinals

Miller coached the tandem of Larry Fitzgerald and Anquan Boldin. Both were in the league’s top-10 in receptions. No better tutor for budding talent Marquez Callaway.

(Actual current job: Robert Morris University OC.)

Offensive line coach

Mike Munchak, Tennessee Titans

A household name with many Vols fans! By 2008, Munchak had been the offensive line coach for over a decade, and the only OL coach in the franchise’s Nashville history.

(Actual current job: Steelers OL coach.)

Co-defensive coordinator

Rex Ryan, Baltimore Ravens

Ryan’s thought of as an NFL guy, but he coached at Cincinnati, Oklahoma, and Kansas State from 1996-1999 before leaving for the Ravens. He also began his career at Eastern Kentucky and Morehead State (plus New Mexico Highlands), all of which gives him more experience working with college athletes and working in the general region than his new head coach has.

(Actual current job: ESPN analyst, just like Gruden!)

Co-defensive coordinator

Monte Kiffin, Tampa Bay Buccaneers

You want a multiple defense? Ryan brings the boom with aggressive blitzes, and the elder Kiffin revolutionized the Cover 2 with his state-of-the-art Tampa 2 variation. It fueled the Bucs to that Super Bowl title that is Gruden’s calling card. And it brings the whole Kiffin family together; what could possibly go wrong?

Photo by Mike Zarrilli/Getty Images

(Actual current job: FAU defensive assistant.)

Defensive line coach

John Mitchell, Pittsburgh Steelers

Has SEC chops, having coached at Alabama, LSU, and Arkansas (albeit when the Hogs were still in the Southwest Conference). Was the first black person to play for Alabama, and the first to coach for the Tide as well, and beat Tennessee twice in the Third Saturday in October rivalry as a player.

(Actual current job: Still there.)

Linebackers coach

Gus Bradley, Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Gruden can pull from his previous staff in Tampa. Bradley learned from Monte with the Bucs.

(Actual current job: Chargers DC.)

Secondary coach

Dom Capers, New England Patriots

Capers is a lifer at both levels, with 11 years of college experience, more than twice as much as Gruden. He was a graduate assistant in 1973 with Nick Saban, and Capers also has a tie to Tennessee. He coached there in 1980 and 1981 as a DBs coach under the legendary Johnny Majors. That’s two more years than Gruden coached on staff at Tennessee (Gruden was a GA).

(Actual current job: Packers DC.)

A note about the elephant in the room

How’s this coaching staff gonna do? Well, if the recent history of Tennessee football is any indication, it’s on track for 8-4 or so.

But as is always the issue with NFL coaches coming to college, will these assistants be able to recruit? Well, we’ll see. But it’s gonna be pretty fun to watch them try, given their head coach’s ethos:

“Too many rules, man. I mean I like to work. I don’t like to be working 15 hours a week with players. The recruiting, Facebook, texting, e-mails – all that stuff. Yeah, I’d probably have you in real deep, deep trouble if I was your college coach.”

[yahoo-roto-arcade-blog]

Fantasy sit-start: Lineup advice on every Week 7 game

Brett Hundley highlights this week’s look at fantasy sits and starts (AP Photo/Bruce Kluckhohn).

Saints vs. Packers: Start Alvin Kamara. Mark Ingram is coming off the huge game, but Kamara figures to benefit from the Saints’ less crowded backfield as well, and last week’s game script was fluky with New Orleans scoring three defensive touchdowns.

Start Brett Hundley, who’s at home in what could easily turn into a shootout. Hundley is plenty familiar with Green Bay’s system and now has a full week of practice with first team reps (he’s also been a monster in preseasons, for what it’s worth), and his workout metrics were off the charts (including a 95th percentile SPARQ score). The Packers still have a ton of weapons, and Hundley is practically free in DFS this week.

Ravens vs. Vikings: Sit Javorius Allen, who’s still locked in a timeshare and is up against a Minnesota front seven that’s ceded just 3.2 YPC and one rushing touchdown this year.

Start the Vikings defense, as they are at home facing Joe Flacco, who’s posted a 1:6 TD:INT ratio over the past five games. Minny’s D is moderately priced in DFS, but they are No. 1 on my board this week…Also with Stefon Diggs out, Adam Thielen is going to be a target hog and a borderline WR1.

Browns vs. Titans: Start Duke Johnson, if for no other reason than there’s no one else worth talking about on the Browns. The Titans are one of nine teams to have allowed more than 300 receiving yards to running backs.

Start Eric Decker, who saw season highs in targets (nine), catches (seven) and yards (88) last week and gets a Browns secondary that’s allowed 14 passing touchdowns and a 111.0 Passer Rating, which are both NFL highs (and Jason McCourty, who’s PFF’s No. 1 graded cover corner, left Friday’s practice with an injured ankle). Delanie Walker might very well miss this game as well. Also treat Derrick Henry as a clear top-10 RB if DeMarco Murray is out.

[Join the free NFL Yahoo Cup. Over $100K in total prizes with weekly winners]

Jaguars vs. Colts: These will be game-time decisions, but start Chris Ivory and/or Allen Hurns if Leonard Fournette and/or Marqise Lee sits. The Colts are allowing an NFL-high 32.5 ppg this season. The next highest is Tennessee at 27.3

He’ll be tough to sit in yearly formats, given T.Y. Hilton has averaged 126.3 yards at home this season, but he’s someone to avoid in DFS, as Jacksonville has allowed the third-fewest fantasy points to wide receivers and an NFL-low 60.0 Passer Rating.

Jets vs. Dolphins: Start Austin Seferian-Jenkins, as he’s racked up 19 targets over the last two weeks, and his four looks inside the five-yard line are second only to Rob Gronkowski among all receivers in the league, and ASJ was suspended the first two games of the year.

Start Jarvis Landry, who will once again see a bunch of targets with DeVante Parker likely to sit. Landry has even seen a couple of targets inside the 10-yard line the past two games.

Buccaneers vs. Bills: Sit Jameis Winston, as while it looks like he’s going to play, he’ll be doing so with a sprained AC joint in his throwing shoulder, and he faces a Bills secondary that’s yielded a 2:8 TD:INT ratio and the third-fewest fantasy points to quarterbacks.

Start Nick O’Leary, who’s suddenly one of Tyrod Taylor’s main options with Charles Clay out, Jordan Matthews still banged up and few other options in the aerial attack. Also fire up LeSean McCoy in DFS, as while he’s still searching for his first score of the year after hitting paydirt 14 times last season, he’s primed to break out at home in this matchup while approaching 30 touches.

Panthers vs. Bears: Sit Kelvin Benjamin, who’s expected to play but is banged up, on the road against a solid defense, and Devin Funchess is quietly emerging as Cam Newton’s preferred target.

Sit all Bears other than Jordan Howard, who remains plenty useful thanks to volume. Otherwise, this offense is a mess under rookie Mitchell Trubisky.

Cardinals vs. Rams: Start John Brown. Larry Fitzgerald is coming off a huge game, but Brown has scored in back-to-back weeks and most importantly is finally back to 100 percent. He’s in for a big second half of the season.

Sit Sammy Watkins, as the disappointing wideout is once again up against a top cover corner in Patrick Peterson. Meanwhile, likely lined up against Tramon Williams for most of the day, Robert Woods makes for a sneaky DFS play this week.

[Week 7: Overall | PPR | QBs | RBs | WRs | TEs | FLEX | DST | Ks]

Cowboys vs. 49ers: Sit Jason Witten. He caught 8-of-10 targets during his last game but hasn’t scored since Week 2, and the 49ers have allowed the fewest fantasy points to tight ends.

Start George Kittle, whose impressive workout metrics have translated to the rare productive rookie season by a tight end. He has a 20+ yard catch in three straight games and seven red-zone targets over his last two and now has his college quarterback throwing to him.

Bengals vs. Steelers: Start Joe Mixon, whose snaps continue to rise under new OC Bill Lazor and gets a Steelers defense that’s allowed the fifth-most fantasy points to running backs. The window to buy Mixon low ends after this week.

Sit Ben Roethlisberger, as while he’s always better at home, the Bengals have yielded an NFL-low 5.6 YPA, and the over/under in this game is just 40.5 points.

Seahawks vs. Giants: Start Jimmy Graham, as this one is simple. He continues to get targeted in the end zone (six on the year), and the Giants have allowed an NFL-high seven touchdowns to tight ends.

Broncos vs. Chargers: Start Bennie Fowler if you’re in a deep league or looking for a super cheap WR in DFS, as Emmanuel Sanders is out, and Demaryius Thomas will be matched up against Casey Hayward, so the opportunity should be there.

Start Hunter Henry, who has 35 more snaps than Antonio Gates over the past two games and is facing a Denver defense that’s ceded the fifth-most fantasy points to tight ends.

Falcons vs. Patriots: Start Austin Hooper, who’s seen 16 targets over the last two games after totaling six over the first three contests, and he was rarely off the field last week. There are going to be a ton of passes Sunday night in a game with a week-high O/U of 56 points.

Sit Mike Gillislee, as he hasn’t scored since Week 2 and played just 13 snaps last week (while losing a fumble). The Falcons have allowed just two rushing scores on the year, and the Patriots’ passing down backs project as better plays in what should be a shootout.

Washington vs. Eagles: Start Josh Doctson. He’s been a disappointment but so have the rest of Washington’s pass catchers. The former first round pick is expected to be a bigger part of the offense moving forward, and the Eagles have given up the fifth-most fantasy points to wide receivers.

Sit Alshon Jeffery. He’s going to become a buy-low candidate soon enough, but it’s bad news Josh Norman returned to practice this week. Jeffery has seen one target inside the 10-yard line this season (and none inside the five).

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