#obviously the gag is that most of this ages horrendously

[batsplat]

Looking ahead to this Sunday’s American GP at Laguna Seca, where Rossi has never won in three previous attempts, the Fiat Yamaha rider told MCN: “In the last races Casey has done a great job and he is very fast and now we have to stay concentrated. “But our situation is a lot more positive than last year. It’s always difficult when you have to follow and you have to race sometimes with not enough speed, but a difficult period for my career was last year. Now I have fun and I like to ride the bike, and in the team we have a good atmosphere to make the best and we hope it is enough. “But the championship is long, and we saw at the start of the season that the Ducati was slower than us. Now it is faster so it is possible to work and to bridge the gap to fight with Stoner and with (Dani) Pedrosa to the last race. Now we suffer a little bit but we have the potential to come back to the top.” Rossi said it was vital he stopped Stoner’s revival, as Laguna is the first in a sequence of three races where Stoner dominated in 2007. Brno and Misano follow Sunday’s 32-lap Laguna Seca showdown and Rossi added: “This moment of the season is difficult for us because we go to three tracks where Stoner last year made some great races, so this is a tough part of the season. But we have a good advantage in the points and quite good speed.”

Valentino Rossi looking to end Casey Stoner's revival

Casey Stoner proved last year that [taming the Ducati] can be done, in emphatic fashion. The Australian ran away with the race last year, Laguna Seca proving a vital stepping stone on his way to the world title. With Stoner's current resurgent form, and with so little time between races for the other teams to respond to his improvement, it would be a foolish person who would bet against a repeat of last year's dominance. Based on the evidence of the past few races, we should know whether Stoner will be stomping all over the competition by about the 4th lap of the 1st session of free practice. At previous tracks, that's how long it's taken Stoner to be on, or over, record pace. If he's that fast on Friday, the race could effectively already be over. The man most capable of preventing that will be under a lot of pressure at Laguna Seca. Valentino Rossi started the season slowly, but by the time he'd won his third race of the season in Mugello, it looked like he could be romping to another triumphant title. Since Barcelona, Stoner has come back with a vengeance, with Rossi so far powerless to respond and forced to settle for 2nd place. Add to this the fact that Laguna Seca is a track where The Doctor has yet to win, and has never been particularly happy at, and you start to see the scale of the challenge ahead of him. Rossi's 5 premier class titles say that this is the sort of challenge that Rossi can handle, but it makes it no less formidable.

2008 Laguna Seca Preview - No Rest

The first session of free practice was very much business as usual at Laguna Seca. Casey Stoner was quickest, though it took him 6 laps to be the fastest man on track this morning, rather than his usual 3. Stoner was running low to mid 1'22s with ease, until he started hitting 1'21s. As a reference: That's nearly 4/10ths of a second faster than the existing pole record, set by Casey Stoner last year at Laguna. Valentino Rossi was the only man who managed to get close, though every time he got anywhere near, Stoner went back out and took another couple of tenths off his best time, opening the gap up to over a second, before Rossi closed it back down again. Chris Vermeulen's form shows that he is still very good here at Laguna Seca, and will be a factor in the race on Sunday.

2008 Laguna Seca FP1 Times Day 1 - Stoner Smashes Pole Record As Usual

Conditions may have been different, but the outcome was exactly the same. Once again, Casey Stoner thoroughly dominated qualifying practice, leading by at least half a second for almost all of the session. He saved the last to best, taking another 0.1 of a second off his track record, set in the morning. Stoner is now 0.466 faster than his own pole record, set in 2007. But he's not just quick for a single lap. Stoner was running constantly in the low 1'22s, about half a second quicker than the next fastest lapper, Valentino Rossi, who was running consistent high 1'22s. At this rate, there's going to be a fantastic battle for 2nd place.

2008 Laguna Seca FP2 Times Day 1 - Stoner Smashes Pole Record Again

1.

Bridgestone, on the other hand, are doing just fine. In every session so far, Casey Stoner took the fastest lap within 5 or 6 laps, and never relinquished the spot at the top of the timesheets. And qualifying practice was no different. On his 4th lap out of the pits, and his 3rd flying lap, Stoner was already under last year's pole record, and was just getting warmed up. After a brief sojourn to the pits, Stoner was back out, and flying. This time, it took him 2 flying laps to smash the pole record, although whether "smash" is a strong enough word to describe taking 7/10ths of a second off last year's pole time is questionable. But if anyone thought that lap was something special, the Australian set them straight. In one of the most intimidating displays of pure, unadulterated speed, Casey Stoner set a run of 7 straight laps of low to mid 1'21 seconds, keeping most of the field well over a second behind him. This was just working at race setup. Stoner wasn't even thinking of taking a qualifying tire yet, and the paddock held its breath at the thought of what would happen once Stoner put soft rubber on his Ducati. It was pretty clear that the battle in qualifying would be the same as the battle in the race. It was just a fight for 2nd place, the pole sitter and race winner - barring the arrival of the four horsemen of the apocalypse - already set in stone. Valentino Rossi was the obvious candidate for the runner-up spot, and was quick right off the mark, but sadly for Rossi, only Greatest-Of-All-Time-quick, not Stoner-quick. Rossi's string of laps chasing a race setup was in itself deeply impressive. A run of 17 laps, 12 of which were low to mid 1'22s. Rossi clearly had race pace, but the question was, would he be able to improve on the mediocre qualifying positions he's had recently.

2.

Nicky Hayden looked like taking the 2nd place on the grid, setting a lap of 1'21.430, but the American lost out to Valentino Rossi in the dying seconds of the session, the Italian setting a blistering lap of 1'21.147. Rossi is clearly very fast at Laguna, but his times tend to pale a little when held up against Stoner's.

3.

This is Casey Stoner's 5th pole in a row, and coming off 3 wins in a row, it's hard to see how he can be stopped from taking his 4th straight win. Valentino Rossi's only hope is that he can get in Stoner's way early in the race, and hope the Australian makes a mistake. At least Rossi is in with a chance of being able to get close to Stoner, starting on the front row.

2008 Laguna Seca QP Report

The Aussie said: “I’ve always kind of enjoyed this track since the first year I came here. We were quite fast straight out of the box in 2006 and you know I’ve always got along with this track quite well. I think because it’s quite different. “It’s not your average kind of circuit. With the ups and down and the bumps and it’s quite a slippery circuit, so it tends to suit my style a little more. “I’m just really happy with the way the whole weekend’s gone. We’ve slowly but surely improved our set-up as the weekend’s gone on and we’ve got to a point now where we’re very happy. We’re confident going into the race.”

Casey Stoner confident of Laguna repeat

Fiat Yamaha rider Rossi though was happy to be on the front row in second place and he said: “For sure it will be very important to make a good start, because now we are on the first row, so it is a good point and a good place to start. “We have to have a good start and after we see what happens, because we have a quite good pace, I’m quite fast but it’s a long race, very difficult for the tyres and also for many riders because this track doesn’t have any moment to relax. “I’m pleased with this result and I think we’ve done a good job today. This morning, even though it was very cold, we were able to make some good steps forward, especially with the suspension setting, and I was able to be quite fast. This afternoon we were able to do a long simulation and this was very important to help us understand how the tyres will be tomorrow. Second place is good for us and I think we’ve done a lot better in the practice this weekend than we have in the last couple of races, so I’m happy about this. “Casey is very fast and I don’t know exactly how to beat him – maybe I need to start 30 seconds earlier! Whatever happens a good start is going to be very important and then I will just try to stay with him and keep pushing.” Rossi has never won at Laguna Seca and he said the target will be to better his previous best result of third back in 2005. He added: “It is not one of my favourite tracks, but when the setting and the tyres work it is a lot more easy compared to the past. And I try to improve my best result, which was third from the first year. I think this year we have the potential to make a good race.”

Valentino Rossi happy to be on front row at Laguna Seca

[mostlymovieswithmax]

Movies I watched in June

Now I think I’m comfortably in a rhythm to get these posts out. For one, I’m writing up short reviews either straight after watching a movie or sometimes it might take a few days. But June was a fairly good month in terms of the amount of films I watched. I got to go to the cinema quite a bit which is always fun. Anyway, let’s get on with it! If you’re looking for something good to watch (or maybe even something bad), I hope this list can help in some way to introduce you to new and different movies that maybe you’ve never heard of, or were thinking of checking out. Here is every film I watched from the 1st to the 30th of June 2021.

Bo Burnham: Inside (2021) - 10/10 Everyone was going off about how great this film is. An hour and a half of Bo Burnham in lockdown, singing songs and being upset is definitely a powerful hook and I have to agree with the general consensus because Inside blew me away. More thoughts on this in my podcast: The Sunday Movie Marathon episode 34.

Bo Burnham: Make Happy (2016) - 7/10 After watching Inside, I figured I’d rewatch some of Burnham’s older stand-up shows on Netflix. Make Happy is a lot of fun, injected with a lot of introspection from Burnham that really makes the special stand out, despite a lot of gags that just didn’t land for me.

Bo Burnham: What. (2013) - 6/10 It’s plain to see just how much Bo Burnham has grown over the years and how he has honed his comedy and music. ‘What.’ is a good stepping stone in the comedian’s career, showcasing loads of promise in him from a young age. There are some jokes that haven’t aged as well and some that straight up dragged, but overall the show is still enjoyable.

The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It (2021) - 3/10 Packed theatre for this one, obviously. People love a Conjuring movie, and I’d also say people love a good scare… but this movie isn’t scary, or good for that matter. More thoughts on episode 35 of the podcast.

The Conjuring (2013) - 6/10 After the horrendously disappointing debacle that was the third Conjuring movie, I decided to watch James Wan’s original movie and man, if this wasn’t better in literally every way. I don’t tend to love James Wan movies but I can’t deny he’s got so much talent in how he makes movies and it makes The Conjuring a lot more fun to see competent filmmaking in the horror genre in a way that actually creates an eerie atmosphere with creative uses of camera-work and editing.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) - 8/10 Normally I’m not big into the old slasher movies. I appreciate that for the time, perhaps they hit differently, but now I just don’t tend to connect with them. Wes Craven’s ‘A Nightmare on Elm Street’ is a bit of an exception. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not particularly scary, though it does employ a lot of interesting techniques and designs. Undeniably, the design for Fred Krueger is a staple in cinema, with the striped jumper, hat, scarred face and knives for fingers not leaving the mind of the general public any time soon. Elm Street doesn’t have too many kills but when it does, it is so effective and fun to watch. Craven was one of the greats, truly.

One Cut of the Dead (2017) - 8/10 This has to be one of the most engaging zombie movies I’ve seen in a long time. There’s a lot to spoil with One Cut of The Dead but I won’t go into that here. It is clever and funny, subverting expectations in ways I really didn’t expect. I really cannot recommend it enough.

Dave Chappelle: Sticks & Stones (2019) - 8/10 Since we’re watching Chappelle's Show for episode 45 of the podcast, I wanted to get an idea for what I was in for, so I watched Dave Chappelle’s stand-up show from a couple of years ago. Yeah, really funny, which I suppose is what you want from a stand-up special, but what makes it better is Chappelle’s commentary on the world at large and how he’s able to combine humour with intelligent criticism.

Fear(s) of the Dark (2008) - 4/10 A few years ago I think I watched this animated black and white anthology film on a New Year's Day when I had foolishly decided to pull an all-nighter and then go out with mates for ice cream. Never again. But I’d forgotten what I thought of this movie and decided to get the DVD for cheap on eBay. Perhaps I am doomed to watch Fear(s) of the Dark only when I am tired because I popped this on when it was nearing midnight. I was lucid enough to understand what I was watching though… and it was quite boring. These short films emulate the filmmakers’ nightmares - an interesting premise in theory, but pretty weak on execution.

The Bourne Identity (2002) - 3/10 We marathoned the first three Bourne movies for The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast, episode 36 so check that out for my expanded thoughts on this, the best Bourne of the three.

The Bourne Supremacy (2004) - 2/10 Immediately after, we did the deep dive into Supremacy, the second Bourne and the worst of the three (albeit by a very slim margin). Check out episode 36 for more.

The Bourne Ultimatum (2007) - 2/10 I really couldn’t care less about these terrible movies. It was a horrible chore to sit through them. Ultimatum was also rubbish. More gripes and discussion in episode 36 of the podcast.

The Father (2021) - 10/10 Another trip to the cinema for this masterpiece. I tried very hard not to sob loudly in the theatre where aside from myself, the audience totalled three people. More discussion of The Father in episode 36 the podcast.

Drag Me To Hell (2009) - 2/10 I’m pretty shocked that Sam Raimi directed this. Usually when I watch one of his films, I can see his staple of fun gore, practical effects, crazy camera movements… but there was none of that here. It just felt like a really bad horror, indistinguishable from the regular affair, with no personality or passion. Drag Me To Hell might even have been one of those movies I’d avoided in the past when I was younger because it seemed too scary but no, it was just boring and bad and I feel like there’s something I’m not getting out of this that other people seem to be.

Moonrise Kingdom (2012) - 8/10 At this point, I feel I have to admit Wes Anderson as perhaps my second favourite director. His movies are just so nice and beautiful to watch. Moonrise Kingdom is a quirky love story between two kids and honestly, with any other director, could have been handled poorly because the story is quite simple. But Anderson injects so much of his signature style and personality into the film. A powerhouse of actors with the likes of Frances McDormand, Bill Murray, Bruce Willis and Tilda Swinton, among a few of Anderson’s regulars, make Moonrise Kingdom a breeze. Good for a dark day to lift the spirits.

Nobody (2021) - 8/10 I needed something to fill an otherwise uneventful day, so I hopped on a bus and booked a ticket for Ilya Naishuller’s new action movie, Nobody. The film started and to my annoyance, the lights in the theatre were still on. When I go to the cinema I don’t really want to see the other people sitting around me, so I got up from my seat, abandoning the first two minutes of the film to find a member of staff to turn the lights off. After showing them that the lights were in fact still on, I took to my seat and watched the movie for what felt like a little while before the lights went off. Nobody is a really fun action movie. Perhaps similar in a lot of ways to John Wick, but with more personality to the main character. More thoughts on episode 37 of The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast.

The Darjeeling Limited (2007) - 8/10 After procuring the Criterion blu-ray from my local hmv, I delved into all the supplements it had to offer, including a making-of documentary, chats with the director, and a gallery of polaroid pictures from when they were shooting the film in India. The Darjeeling Limited is perhaps not peak Wes Anderson, but I do kind of love it. It makes me want to go on a journey to another country with my brother and sister, perhaps in ten to fifteen years. Here, the main characters are three brothers who travel to India seeking some kind of spiritual experience. Things don’t seem to work out that way, however, because I’m not sure how spiritual an experience you can have when you plan out an itinerary to schedule it. Fantastic performances all round and of course, beautiful direction and cinematography.

Face/Off (1997) - 3/10 Was I supposed to laugh? Maybe I was just too tired but I really couldn’t stand Face/Off. It didn’t feel particularly special and despite a couple of fun ideas, it was mostly quite boring.

Luca (2021) - 5/10 The new Pixar movie leaves a lot to be desired. The animation is really second to none and I can’t fault how beautiful the movie looks, more so when it’s set in this little Italian town than under the sea. The story is so uninspired though, with the basic premise being that the protagonists want a Vespa so they enter a competition to win the money to buy one. Also they’re fish that turn into people on dry land. Maybe that’s enough for some people, but I couldn’t shake the familiarity of Luca. It never went in any interesting directions and basically did exactly what I figured it would do. I don’t believe it’s out here to subvert expectations but I would like some creativity when it comes to the writing. Perhaps if I watched it again, I might like it less. It was pretty dull.

Punch-Drunk Love (2002) - 10/10 I’m a little disappointed with the Criterion blu-ray for Punch-Drunk love. It’s supplements host a couple of low-quality deleted scenes that were clearly deleted for a reason, and some weird artsy music videos that incorporated footage from the movie. I was quite shocked at how low-effort it all seemed. The movie itself is fantastic though and I do believe it to be Adam Sandler’s best performance (and I really liked Uncut Gems). He portrays a man who is constantly put down by his family, clearly has some kind of social disability, and on top of it all he’s getting scammed by a sex line. Amongst all this, he’s trying to navigate a new relationship and it’s so sweet to watch all the interactions between Sandler and Emily Watson. It’s a perfect melding of romance, comedy and anxiety, beautifully directed by Paul Thomas Anderson.

Fargo (1996) - 9/10 Another movie you wouldn’t expect to be so funny, especially since it’s based on this horrific true story about murder, deceit and money. But the Coen brothers know how to handle it. Excellent performances, beautiful colour palette, and a story that just gets more and more insane as it goes.

House (1977) - 7/10 House (or, Hausu) was a recommendation for episode 37 of The Sunday Movie Marathon podcast so check that out for more discussion. Generally speaking, this Japanese horror/comedy was bonkers. Insanely creative and abstract (which at points can detriment the film) with an almost Balamory-esque presentation. I was happy to find that the comedy was not lost on me at all; this is a hilarious film, albeit maybe not all the time.

The Princess Bride (1987) - 10/10 I reviewed this in my May wrap-up but this time around, I had recommended The Princess Bride for the podcast, the discussion for which you can listen to in episode 37. It all clicked this time around. It is such a fun, warm movie with a lot of laughs and superb production.

This Is Spinal Tap (1984) - 8/10 Another Rob Reiner joint, a few years before The Princess Bride. This Is Spinal Tap is lauded as a masterpiece in comedic cinema and I might agree; this movie is hilarious. Shot in mockumentary fashion, it follows a band playing shows and trying to get gigs, coupled with the inevitable screw-ups of live performance and creative disagreements. It lost me every now and again but it’s still a must-watch.

The Hunchback of Notre Dame (1996) - 6/10 A decent Disney flick but certainly not their best. One highlight includes the villain singing a lament about wanting to have sex with Esmerelda and calling her a witch for giving him a boner.

Ponyo (2008) - 4/10 Not sure if I’ve ever disliked a Miyazaki movie before but I did not vibe with Ponyo. It came across as very baby and as such, there really wasn’t much to read into. The animation is fantastic as always but so much of it felt specifically tailored to a younger crowd.

Roman Holiday (1953) - 9/10 Classic romance at its best. I had heard on a podcast that this was the sexiest movie the guest had ever seen and while maybe not in the traditional sense of the word, I do get where they’re coming from. I was tearing up with just how lovely it all was, following a princess who runs away and spends the day with a man she meets in Rome (where it was shot on location), doing all the things she’s wanted to do but never could because of royal responsibilities. Fantastic performances from Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck who sell the chemistry of the characters so well.

F9 (2021) - 2/10 I’ve never seen any of the Fast & Furious movies and after watching the ninth in the series, I don’t want to. This is basically the Vin Diesel show; we watch him drive cars fast and punch people a lot. Wow! I don’t really understand what it (and forgive the pun) driving people to see these movies if they’re all in this same vein. As far as I can tell, F9 is the goofiest of the series so far and I’ll admit I had a chuckle or two at some of the truly implausible moments, such as a part where one of the team gets shot by about ten men with machine guns, yet manages to kill them all without being affected by the bullets… but overall, in this two-and-a-half-hour experience, I was largely bored.

Shaolin Soccer (2001) - 7/10 I love this movie! Shaolin Soccer is so much fun; it is goofy and out there and completely crazy, all by design. Steven Chow knew what he was making when he set out to craft this insane story of a group of guys using Kung-Fu to play football. The basic story itself is nothing new but it’s elevated by the infectious comedy and implausibility of what’s happening. Balls are kicked into space and across fields so fast the very ground is torn asunder. A man eats an egg off a dirty shoe. This is cinema.

Casino Royale (2006) - 7/10 I had seen a trailer at the cinema for the new Bond movie and I have to say, I’ve never really given 007 the time of day, aside from a few of the very first movies I’d tried watching a while ago. But the new trailer kind of got me hyped, so I wanted to watch all of the Craig era Bond movies, starting with Casino Royale. I had a great time! Even though there’s not loads of fighting or weapons or fast cars, the meat of the movie actually comes from this poker game Bond is playing against the villain, played brilliantly by Mads Mikkelsen. I was surprised to witness a bit of cock-and-ball torture in this 12-rated movie but I would be lying if I said it didn’t stick with me.

Quantum of Solace (2008) - 5/10 Immediately after Casino Royale, I jumped into the second of Daniel Craig’s Bond movies, Quantum of Solace. Sadly it’s quite weak, with not much going on aside from the general Bond fare. Mathieu Amalric’s villain lacked a lot of menace or motivation and generally, I’m not super worried about a brilliant story in a Bond movie, but even the action felt weak in this. Quantum of Solace didn’t exactly upset me but it failed to wow me in any way either. The saving grace of the movie is certainly Daniel Craig as the hero, capturing Bond and what he’s supposed to be.

Skyfall (2012) - 6/10 A marked improvement from its predecessor, Sam Mendes helms Skyfall, Craig’s third outing as Bond. Skyfall delves into Bond’s past as he seems to be slipping a bit, not as much the expert operative he once was. It would have been nice to see more of his fall from grace, as they don’t really show us how he’s become less efficient as much as they give other characters expository dialogue telling us how he drinks and does drugs and is haunted by childhood trauma. For me, that’s where the meat of the story lies and I would have preferred more of a character piece if indeed they were delving into that side of the character anyway. That being said, the fights are still better choreographed than the last instalment and the colour grading and scenery is often very visually interesting. Everything in Skyfall is better than its predecessor and it’s surely thanks to Sam Mendes who does a great job at directing.

Howl's Moving Castle (2004) - 8/10 Another go round for Howl's Moving Castle, as this was a recommendation for my podcast, The Sunday Movie Marathon. My opinion, I feel, is unchanged. It's a fantastic film, and you can listen to more of what I have to say in episode 37. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2 - 3/10 A pretty poor end to a poor series of movies. I'm surprised I've watched the Twilight movies as many times as I have but I also know I'll watch them again. Part 2 I watched with the YMS commentary track on YouTube which, again made the experience a lot better. But otherwise the series seemed to get better as it went along… until the last movie. Ultimately my biggest problem with it is that nothing actually happens and the plot feels like a late addition rather than a natural progression of the story. It’s basically a whole movie of set-up to a payoff that doesn’t even canonically happen. A big thing with YA adaptations in this era was making a final book into two movies, regardless as to whether it needed that much time or not. Breaking Dawn does not need to be two movies at two hours each. About ten new characters are introduced here and the film is afraid of killing even one of them off. It's the last movie! We're not going to see these characters again! Kill some of them! There's just no emotional weight to any of it and I hate to say I was disappointed with the ending because I have such low expectations for these films but man, this was so unsatisfying.

Frances Ha (2012) - 8/10 Life is hard. And I hate this movie because it shows me so much of what terrifies me about being alive. And I love this movie because it shows me so much of what I’m alive for. Noah Baumbach’s brutally honest depiction of growing up and fending for yourself struck me in a way I wasn’t expecting and I think it’s because I’m at a point in my life where I’m worrying a lot about how it’s all going to turn out. The titular character is burdened with the stress of working low-paid jobs and paying rent while juggling school and making time for her passion of dancing as she tries to connect with people she’s lost, as temporary friends and housemates come and go. She feels like a lonely character despite often being around a lot of people. Frances Ha is fantastic and heartbreaking and uplifting… but it made me feel bad so I hate it.

[acc3ssdenied]

BRUISED | 03

SUMMARY: You don’t know what you expect when your best friend and her boyfriend invite you to one of his friend’s parties. But, it certainly wasn’t for you to be at an underground boxing venue the next day and for you to be thrown into a world that you had no idea existed

PAIRING: boxer!jungkook x reader

GENRE: non idol au, boxer!jungkook, badboy!jungkook, tattoo!jungkook, angst, fluff, smut

WARNING: explicit language, honestly this is pure chaos i don’t know what i was on when i wrote it but please enjoy :)

WORD COUNT: 3.0k

A/N: i really love the whole jungkook with tattoos and him being a boxer/ badboy so I have decided to write my own! this will have updates alternating with mélomanie most likely but, i also have to keep up with my wattpad schedule. please tell me what you think and ask if you would like to be added to the tag list <3

TAG LIST:  @singulari-taes @lil-bai-of-sunshine @diab1a @bts-trash24 ​ @rubydotexe @ryulite @dammit-jjk @bbyboihongjoong  @bunnyboyjjk​ @taehyungiev13 @scvkjinrecs @milkandminie @screamingshoes @mygscafe @kimvantaee @pleasantpeachstudent @fivesecondsofsarang​ @frenchki​ @gukksluv

CHAPTER THREE

What was wrong with you? How could you allow your opinion of him to change so quickly? You only had one answer: he smiled. That night, he smiled at you genuinely for the first time and he actually looked his age. You had asked Chaeyoung more about him after that night as you couldn’t sleep and it turned out you were the same age; not that anyone could tell as he looked at least 25 most of the time. Jeon Jungkook was most likely going to ruin you. You knew it and frankly, you were ready to embrace it. If you were to die at the hands of his doe eyes and childlike laugh, you would die happy. You needed to calm down; here you were, barely acquaintances with him, but you were ready to die at his hands. Chaeyoung shared the same opinion.

“I really don’t get why you’re so…” she paused to think of the right phrase, leaning against your kitchen counter as she watched you finish making your coffees, “Worked up over this. I mean, apologising was the decent thing to do - so obviously he did it.” She hadn’t been there the previous week so was interested to find out your version of events.

Looking down at your coffee, you frowned, “I-I don’t-” you stumbled over your words, left hand coming up to scratch behind your ear in confusion, “You’re right, I guess. He’s just not what I expected.” The put-out expression on your face made Chaeyoung pause her thoughtful staring to move around the counter.

She leant her head against your shoulder, “Jungkook’s a nice guy when you get to know him but, he’s really quite introverted and can come off as cold. If he had no interest in you, he wouldn’t have made the effort.” Honestly, she wasn’t lying to make you feel better about yourself, she was relaying what Hoseok had said to her over a phone call that morning. But, the bright smile that lit up your features still made her pleased with herself.

Biting your lip slightly, you nodded and downed your coffee. Frowning slightly, you turned to her and asked, “Why are we drinking coffee at one in the afternoon?” As soon as she had arrived, you had begun to make them out of habit but, there really wasn’t any need for them.

Chaeyoung chuckled, reaching around to pinch your side, “Because, you’re a creature of habit with zero common sense.” There was a teasing smile on her face and you let out an offended sound, pinching her in the same manner as she had done to you. The two of you returned to your previous state of petty seven-year-olds who couldn’t share the last cookie and a battle ensued in the kitchen. It was far too fun for you to actually acknowledge that she was one hundred per cent correct in her comment. 

Clicking your tongue, as you tried to straighten your jacket that had become wrinkled in the fight, you mumbled, “Maybe.” You folded your arms over your chest, trying to hide the smile on your face as you watched her pat down the frizz that had formed on her hair.

She stuck her tongue out at you teasingly, mimicking you in a childish voice, “Maybe.” You flipped her off, walking over to the coat rack by the door and pulling your jacket on. Chaeyoung pulled her phone out, checking her texts from Hoseok and the others, “Hobi’s outside and the others have a table at the restaurant.” Nodding, you ran over to where you had left your keys before shoving them into your pocket and leading her to the elevator.

“It’s only a five-minute drive from?” You asked, worrying over whether the three of you were going to be obnoxiously late. Thankfully, your best friend nodded and you breathed out a sigh of relief just as the elevator arrived at the bottom floor.

As always, you could feel Hoseok’s presence before you could see him, the bass of the rap music he played resonating through the ground beneath you. Chaeyoung only scoffed, rolling her eyes at her boyfriend as he wound the window down and blew her a kiss dramatically. You feigned gagging, pausing to lean over and pretend to retch over the pavement, causing you to receive Hoseok’s middle finger.

“Always a delight, Hobi,” you drawled, sliding into the back seat which you had claimed as your designated seat when you first sat in the car, “Always a delight.” He pulled away from the curb, turning onto the main road as he looked at you through the rearview mirror, eyes covered by blue-tinted sunglasses.

Hoseok placed his hand over his chest dramatically, the other one controlling the wheel as he turned right, eyes flickering over to his wing mirror momentarily. A wry smirk played on his lips as he said, “I aim to please,” in a ridiculous and exaggerated posh accent. Chaeyoung muffled her laughter with her palm, refusing to give him the satisfaction of being able to cause any form of joy with his horrendous jokes. You slammed your head back into the headrest, a loud sigh leaving your mouth.

Just as you were about to demand how long you would be, he swiftly turned into the car park and pulled into a parking space right in front of the restaurant. Almost as soon as he had stopped moving, you jumped out of the car; your desire to be fed beating out any want for safety you had previously claimed. The couple decided to take their sweet time - probably in the hopes of you starving to death. Honestly, did they need to hold hands to walk inside?

You bounced on the balls of your feet, scowling at them impatiently as they strolled over to you. Chaeyoung gave you a sly smirk as they finally reached the door, almost as though she knew exactly what you were thinking. Mentally, you noted to buy that voodoo doll you had seen on amazon the night prior. 

It wasn’t hard to spot the group, Seokjin was already lecturing Taehyung loud enough for heads to have turned throughout the restaurant. Rolling your eyes at the typical behaviour, you tucked your hands into your pockets and made your way over to the large booth that took up a large portion of the back corner. Yoongi was the first to spot you, comically leaping up and climbing over Jimin to prance over to you in a manner that was completely out of character. The group watched him with incredulous eyes as he enveloped you in a tight hug, acting as though he had not seen Hoseok and Chaeyoung when he linked your arms together and dragged you over to the booth. 

“Move it, Jimin. I’m sitting beside my queen today.” Namjoon choked on the diet coke that he had been drinking peacefully. Pouting at you in a puppy-like manner, Jimin moved closer to Seokjin to leave enough room for you and Yoongi to sit on the end of the bench. Pulling up two chairs, Hoseok and Chaeyoung sat adjacent to you, their hands already entwining themselves in a disgustingly cute manner. It was then that you looked up, your eyes automatically meeting the Bambi-like ones that you dreaded seeing. You averted your eyes quickly, a pink flush appearing on your cheeks as you made a show of searching through the menu in front of you.

Taehyung sipped from his diet coke, giving you a boxy smile as he leant on the palms of his hands, “You three took your sweet time.” Hoseok and Chaeyoung exchanged a knowing glance, already anticipating the rant that you were about to go on.

You slammed the menu closed, the plastic slapping against the marble of the counter as your head snapped to give the couple an accusing glare, “Well,” you said slowly, jabbing your finger in their direction, “If these two didn’t live with the only purpose to separate me from my one true love, food, we would have been more than on time.” Scowling, you crossed your arms over your chest stubbornly and made a point of turning away from them.

A dramatic gasp came from your right, Yoongi looking down at you with a feigned look of despair, “I thought that I was your only love, my queen?” Namjoon groaned quietly, sinking into the corner as though he could disappear into it and never return. He wasn’t so lucky.

You placed your hand over your heart, a solemn expression on your face that you swore deserved an oscar. “I dreaded the day where you would learn of my betrayal,” you flung your hand out exaggeratedly as you channelled your inner Shakespeare, “But, I couldn’t resist the temptation that it held over me,” you sniffed, casting your eyes into the middle distance, “Can you find it in yourself to forgive me, my king?”

Stubbornly, Yoongi turned away and reached for his glass of water, taking the straw and placing droplets under his eyes to feign tears. Internally, you cursed; how could you allow him to outdo your performance. He turned back to you, answering in a choked-up voice, “Anything for you, my queen.” 

The group had been staring at you in mortification, noticing the attention your scene had gathered from other guests. Jungkook’s chin had slid down to be cupped by his hands as he mouthed ‘what the fuck’ to himself in confusion. Before anyone could ask you what had caused both of you to turn the booth into an improv class, the waiter came to the table.

Unfortunately for you, his eyes seemed to be glued to you as you urgently lunged for the menu, having forgotten your order during your dramatics. You cursed yourself under your breath rapidly, settling on the American-style pancakes and bacon. Breakfast foods were superior and you would fight anyone who disagreed. You supposed the waiter was attractive in a way, he would have been more so if he could have stopped himself from leering at you.

“My name’s Mark, I’ll be your waiter today.” He started taking the orders, going around the table as his gaze never strayed far from your unknowing frame - you and Taehyung were having a silent argument about the validity of breakfast foods during the day, you were winning of course. Eventually, he reached you, the slimy smirk on his face deepening as he met your blank gaze. “And what can I get for you, beautiful?”

You coughed slightly, looking down at your menu with an alarmed gaze. Jesus, he was straight forward. “Um, I’ll have the American-style pancakes, please?” For some reason, you phrased it as a question and you cursed at yourself, you looked vulnerable.

Mark was blocking your view of Chaeyoung, meaning you couldn’t share your usual glance of disgust. He leaned further towards you and you silently wished the booth could have been bigger so you could press yourself further against Yoongi. Damn, what type of K-Drama did he think he was in. A bad one, you decided as he spoke again, “Is there,” he paused, eyeing you suggestively, “Anything else you would like?” Unfortunately for him, neither he nor his number was listed on your menu.

Frowning innocently, you flipped back through the pages of the menu and glanced down at the drinks list, “Could I have an iced Americano as well, please?” Blinking up at him with confused wide eyes, as you closed the menu with a hint of finality.

The waiter managed to hide his taken-aback expression, to his credit, “Sure,” he said. You then decided that he must have been a cockroach in his previous life because he just kept coming back for more. “Is there anything else you like the look of in here?” He winked at you. Internally, you were cursing him out in as many languages as you knew but, your violence was pacified by your desire to be fed and that couldn’t be fulfilled if you were removed from the restaurant for deboning your waiter.

You made a show of pouting down at the menu, “I mean,” you hummed thoughtfully, tilting your head in a lost manner, “There’s nothing else on the menu.” You paused for a moment before turning back to him with a bright smile, feeling triumph run through you as his smirk widened. “Do you know what shade the paint is? I’ve been meaning to redecorate my bedroom and that colour is just perfect.” On your right, you felt Yoongi clutch onto your arm as he tried to stop himself from howling right in the waiter’s face. Taehyung did no such thing, already giggling into Namjoon’s shoulder as the elder covered his mouth.

The waiter cleared his throat, averting his eyes as his face fell into a slight grimace, “Um,” he scratched the back of his head awkwardly, “I’m not sure but, I could ask my manager?” He offered, noting the bright and hopeful smile on your face. If he wasn’t an unprofessional prick you might have felt sorry for him but, alas, he was so you felt no guilt in bringing back your inner Shakespeare for his embarrassment.

“That’s perfect,” you said in a sickly sweet voice, “Thank you so much.” You didn’t let your, disgustingly, bright smile fade until he had scurried back into the kitchen. For the second time in that afternoon, you slammed your head back into the headrest as you blew out a loud breath. 

Yoongi let go of your arm and burst into a fit of hysterical laughter, resting his forehead against the cool marble of the table as Jimin almost collapsed onto his back. You could have sworn that you didn’t agree to lunch with a pack of wolves. Once he had calmed down, Yoongi turned back to your, resting his hand on your shoulder, “That was god tier behaviour,” he turned to the rest of the group with an adamant expression on his face, “I want Y/N’s expression carved onto my headstone.” Taehyung nodded his head in agreement.

Seokjin laughed, a sound coming out of his mouth similar to that of a windshield-wiper, “I thought Jeon was going to cave his skull in if he didn’t stop.” A tense silence fell over the table, you chose to ignore it and take a long sip of the iced Americano that had arrived during their hysterics. The sweet taste of coffee did nothing to block out the sounds of Seokjin complaining, “Don’t threaten me, I’m your hyung - show me some respect!” You could only assume that Jungkook had insinuated that he was going to murder the older man. How unfortunate.

“I thought you were going to ruin his life,” Taehyung said, a hint of laughter still tainting his voice as he jabbed his finger to Jungkook, who was sat on his right, “Like you did to Kook.” A small sound of protest left the younger’s mouth, his bottom lip jutting out slightly that made his face far too vulnerable to have a body with so many tattoos.

You giggled slightly, shooting a small smile towards Jungkook as you feigned a thoughtful look, “I was but, last time I did that I was arrested for murder.” The group shared a wary laugh, knowing you were joking but also slightly doubting it. “I’m joking,” you reassured, taking another sip of your drink, “I spent a night in a dirty jail cell for assault and was banned from all chains of Panda Express for life.” Namjoon and Seokjin blinked at you in surprise, not actually expecting for you to come out with something like that.

On the other hand, Taehyung and Yoongi shared aghast expressions and pressed their hand over their hearts as though they had been shot through the chest, “You can never go into Panda Express again?” You nodded slowly, not quite understanding why they were so horrified, “Is life really worth living without that?” Taehyung said, voice dripping with despair as he reached forward to take your hand in his own.

Your strange moment was interrupted by Mark, as well as another waiter’s, return. “Here are your American-style pancakes,” he said, smirking at your slightly as he allowed his hand to linger on your plate much longer than it should have, “I hope you enjoy.” You nodded stiffly, counting down the seconds until he would disappear.

As much as the restaurant’s service was a bit horrific, they made extraordinary looking pancakes. You would have devoured them on the spot, had you not noticed the folded napkin tucked beneath the edge of the plate. At least you knew why he was so fixated on your plate. Scoffing quietly, you reached for the napkin and gently unfolded it. Typical. ‘Mauve’ was so not a paint shade and you would most definitely not be contacting his mobile number for any further information.

“I didn’t order desperation on the side of my pancakes,” you muttered, scowling at the napkin as you tossed it to the middle of the table. You noticed the smile on Jungkook’s face, he tried to hide it by focusing on the pizza in front of him. A giggle escaped your mouth and he looked up to meet your gaze, his eyes round as he gave you a small smile. For the first time since the group had entered the restaurant, the booth was silent. It was only interrupted by a loud sneeze coming from in front of you. You looked up, seeing Jungkook covering his nose and mouth with the napkin that Mark had given to you.

A small chuckle left your mouth and you glanced to your left, immediately spotting the crestfallen expression on the waiter’s face. Tragic. It must have been an accident, he couldn’t have known what was on the napkin and intentionally grabbed it when he sneezed. Despite knowing this, it didn’t stop the small smile that tugged at your lips for the rest of the meal.

✰✰✰✰✰✰✰

A/N: this is shorter than it usually is but it’s for sure more of a filler chapter :// i know i haven’t updated in a while and I’m sorry for that <3 my mental health at the moment is almost nearing rock bottom so its a lot harder to write for me but I’m doing my best. please feel free to send me asks because i love talking to you all and please ask me if you would like to be added to the tag list :) Also if anyone could please tell me why my tag list never works on mobile it would be greatly appreciated i think it’s something to do with the html coding but idrk how it works. i’ve restated the ones that don’t work but if you’ve been tagged twice please tell me so i can remove it

@bunnyboyjjk @taehyungiev13 @scvkjinrecs @milkandminie @mygscafe @screamingshoes @kimvantaee @pleasantpeachstudent @fivesecondsofsarang @frenchki

[holy-fate-worse-than-death]

Okay, hear me out

The Outlaws re-form but it's just Jason Todd and Harley Quinn running around like chaotic bisexual messes working on their unresolved trauma and identity issues, while Poison Ivy is the Tired Lesbian Mom Friend™ trying to keep them all together.

So here's the set-up:

Via Roy's connection to Killer Croc (and yes Roy is definitely alive in this one, fuck you Tom King) Roy and Jason end up working with Harley and Pam.

It's supposed to be a one-time thing, but when Roy hangs up his quiver to be a Hot Single Dad™, Jason finds himself in need of some help, and he doesn't really have anyone else to ask.

This ties into the idea that Jason combats his social isolation by somewhat accidentally forming teams (eg Outlaws 1.0 and 2.0) that are meant to be short-term alliances but inadvertently become like family.

Ideas I have about this AU:

- Harley and Pam are absolutely canon. Not just queerbaiting where they're a bit too close to be friends. They kiss, they call each other "girlfriends" and Jason is absolutely beating the shit out of anyone who says anything remotely homophobic

- Harley and Pam definitely encourage Jason to admit his feelings for Roy (which they know about before Jason does), and eventually there's a lot of Jason and Roy being perfect gay dads

- Harley and Pam definitely babysit Lian at some point when Jason needs Roy to come out of retirement for a mission that only he can do (which also doubles as an excuse for a whole lot of sexual tension, e.g. "I miss spending time with you"-type stuff), and although Roy is incredibly skeptical, it actually works out really well

- Not only are Harley and Pam great babysitters, Roy feels empowered to start working on tech for the new Outlaws and he works as their own version of Oracle; gathering intel, sending them on missions, etc. This is kinda similar to the role he took on in Red Hood/Arsenal (2013), and it allows him to feel a sense of purpose and connection to his superhero days without feeling like he's neglecting Lian. (It's also a great excuse to spend a lot more time around Jason, if you catch my meaning)

- I know some people really don't fuck with the idea of Harley and Jason interacting, but I actually think it would work really well. We already saw somewhat of a precedent in Red Hood/Arsenal (2013) when Jason was trying to connect with Duela Dent (AKA Joker's Daughter). He's able to be compassionate towards her and connect with her despite the fact that she's literally wearing the Joker's rotting skin as a mask

- I think a similar relationship between Harley and Jason would be really healing for both of them, because it allows them to be people who form relationships that aren't necessarily decided by their trauma. I think there were absolutely points in Jason's life where he couldn't have been friends with Harley, and points in Harley's life where she couldn't have been friends with Jason, because of how much they remind each other of Joker. But Jay and Harley being able to have that friendship, and find common ground in other aspects of their identity (in the case of this AU the fact that they're both LGBT+ and don't adhere to Batman or the Justice League's moral standards), means that they've moved beyond their trauma and don't always see the Joker in everyone

- Obviously there'll still be initial growing pains, but I don't think the focus of this story should be on the Joker or any clown-related trauma. At a certain point, trauma just isn't a personality trait and it certainly shouldn't make up the majority of either Harley or Jason's personalities. They're both so much more than that

- At some point later in the story, however, there would be a situation were Harley and Jason come across the Joker and have to fight him. There's an unspoken tension because Jason is worried that Harley is worried that Jason can't handle it; and Harley is worried that Jason is worried that she's going to go back to the Joker. But they're in such an intense situation that they have no choice but to trust each other and trust the friendship they've built, and in the end they save the day because they were able to do that, which strengthens their friendship even further

- Pam routinely makes good points about radical environmentalism, and there are throwaway gags about how -- while the Outlaws primarily do the vigilante work that's too dirty for the Justice League -- they also occasionally break into animal testing facilities or sabotage coal mines/big businesses/other environmentally-damaging institutions

- There are regular cameos from other grey-area vigilantes (e.g. other former Suicide Squad members) and this story really tries to delve into the complexities of morality and why people do things that appear "criminal". It's mainly about dispelling myths and reducing stigma surrounding things like criminal behaviour, mental illness and addiction

- There's a cameo appearance from Killer Croc that deals with addiction and redemption, especially through Roy and KC's friendship

- KC is just so fucking proud that Roy is a dad, and there's probably a cute moment at some point along the lines of, "I may be a croc, but these sure aren't crocodile tears"

- Because this is my AU and I can do anything I want, I'd also like to see this story involve Dr Victoria October. I love her so much, she's one of the most underrated characters in all of DC, and I feel like a snarky, middle-aged trans woman would really round out the gigantic queer mess that this story is

- They come to Dr October for advice in a case that involves biomedical science of some kind, and it's meant to be a one-off. But then Jason gets injured a couple weeks later and Harley and Pam don't know where else to take him

- Victoria and Basil (Clayface) are definitely still dating in this one, and occasionally the Outlaws will team up with Basil for a case (although he's mostly in retirement while Victoria tries to figure out how to stop his powers from causing his brain to deteriorate like in Detective Comics (2016))

- Between Roy and Dr October the Outlaws end up with better tech than Batman a lot of the time

- Victoria is absolutely horrendous with kids but regularly finds herself having to discuss plans and gadgets in person with Roy, so she ends up sitting in his living room surrounded by children's toys, sipping tea and resisting the urge to glare at the adorable, gurgling baby in front of her

- She gets left with Lian at one point while Roy runs off to save Jason's ass, and it basically goes down like this:

- Croc loves babies and the first time Lian sees him she cries (Croc probably sneaks up from the sewers to talk to Roy about something while he's out for a walk with Lian in one of those cute chest harnesses you use to carry babies). Croc is so hurt that she's scared of him

- As she grows older she stops being scared and ends up fascinated by his shiny scales and big pointy teeth

- I'd also like Lex Luthor to be involved in this at some point. I'm thinking that maybe this could slot into the New 52 canon pretty well. Maybe the Roy in this story is the "real" Roy and the one that died at Sanctuary was a LexCorp clone. I'm also just really into this idea because I like Roy's robot arm and I think portraying those types of disabilities is really important and cool. Plus, it separates him from the other archers in DC and kinda epitomises the fact that he's the "tech" guy

Okay that's all I can think of right now, but this AU is basically my OTP + my other OTP + my other favourite characters

... Guess this is another fanfiction I gotta write lol

[bi-bi-richie]

Bubblegum Love

Richie just needs a few suckers for the week, but life is a little unpredictable, isn’t it? 

Ao3

Richie sucked a red sucker in his mouth. The mellow taste of artificial cherry flavoring coated his tongue. It reminded him of old days when he’d be sick with a cold and his mom was have to bribe him to take the disgusting cough syrup. But, after all, cherry was better than grape. Truth be told, Richie didn’t care for suckers at all. The way they made his lips chapped and mouth run dry wasn’t anything favorable for him, not to mention water didn’t taste too great afterward. It’s just that Richie had quit cigarettes and they sort of left him with this confusing oral fixation. So now he sucks in the sickly sweet cherry suckers, hoping one day he’ll leave this addiction behind.

Saturday was a rough day for Richie. He ran out of suckers, which was something he was scolded for by his friend Bev, who made it clear that he needed to have them on hand at all times. No, running out of the disgusting sugar-on-sticks wasn’t too bad, it was the feeling of needing something all day and the scolding from Bev that made it miserable. He couldn’t break away from his shift at the diner, he knew he’d have to wait all day to get down to the gas station to pick up a bag for the next week.

When his shift ended, he shot out of the diner so fast he almost forgot his backpack and tips. Unfortunately, he walked that day, and, even worse, the nearest gas station was two miles away. But, there was one thing that wasn’t two miles away.

“Welcome to Ben’s Candy Shoppe,” an unenthusiastic man called from behind a cash register, “tell me if you need anything.”

Richie nodded his head, though he was certain this man didn’t see it, nor did he care that Richie acknowledged him at all.

Richie directed himself to the nearest aisle out of sight from the man and started looking up and down the small rows for any sort of fruit flavored candy. Chocolate seemed to be this candy shop’s specialty, which didn’t exactly make sense since chocolate wasn’t candy. He walked down another aisle and found things like Jolly Ranchers, Warheads, Sour Patch Kids, but no suckers. He was beginning to wonder why a candy shop wouldn’t have any fucking suckers! What kind of shit place is this?

He was almost ready to dip and suffer a two-mile walk down to the gas station, but then soft footsteps came up from behind him and in two seconds made him change his mind entirely.

“Hi, can I help you?” A young man, Richie’s age, no doubt, asked. Richie turned around and felt his entire soul leave his body from pure shock about how incredibly attractive the man was in front of him.

“Oh wow…” Richie whispered, looking into the man’s soft, chocolate eyes. The man was… beyond words for Richie. He had soft brown hair, beautiful doe eyes, freckles painting his sun-kissed skin, shiny plump lips and to top it off he wore a yellow, red, and white striped shirt. In short, he was Richie’s fucking dream man.

“Uh,” the boy coughed, “do you need help?”

Richie snapped and shook his head as if to show it, “sorry! Uh, yes actually I do need help.”

The boy smiled and nodded his head, “well, I’m Eddie, what’re you looking for?”

“Well, I kinda really need some suckers, but I can’t find any.” He pointed to the shelves of chocolate and tart treats.

Eddie nodded his head and pointed to the end of the aisle, “actually we have suckers on the aisle next to us, guess you were in too much of a hurry to see?”

Richie blushed, “well, sweets are my addiction. And, who’s to say me missing the suckers was a bad thing? I got a pretty cute knight in shining armor to save me.”

Fuck fuck fuck! What was that!? Why would I-

Eddie giggled, “guess I’m lucky that Stan didn’t come over instead.”

Then Richie giggled, feeling his stomach do flips and his heart flutter. Richie hadn’t really been in the dating game for a while, after he quit cigarettes he decided he would focus on himself. He was going to build a better Richie. Now, he may be addicted to sugar on a stick, but he thinks he’s done an amazing job that was definitely good enough for him to work his Tozier charm once again.

“I think I’m the lucky one,” Richie said quietly, but not so Eddie couldn’t hear. “Walk me to the suckers?” He felt overjoyed when Eddie gave him a shy nod.

It wasn’t a long walk, obviously, but Richie felt himself glow with excitement. He couldn’t help but feel like hot shit, I mean, the guy had the most beautiful man he’s ever met walking right beside him. At the same time though, he was intrigued by Eddie, even if they’ve had a pretty basic conversation.

When they reached the suckers, Richie felt his mouth water and the need to have something in his mouth overwhelm him. What threw him off was the number of flavors presented to him, definitely far off from his basic cough syrup cherry.

“Wider selection than you thought?” Eddie asked with a smile.

“Mhm,” Richie nodded, “I usually just take a cherry one and call it a day.”

Eddie made a fake gagging noise and shook his head in disgust, “cherry is probably the worst! Taste like kid’s medicine, grape isn’t that far off either.”

Richie couldn’t help but let out a bark of a laugh, “you raise a good point, Spaghetti.”

“They taste as bad as that nickname, what the hell was that?”

Richie let out a loud cackle that echoed throughout the mostly empty store, “just a cute nickname for a cute guy! Don’t like it?”

Eddie made another  fake gagging sound and shook his head, “it’s horrendous,”  he complained, but the beaming smile on his face said otherwise.

“Whatever you say, Eds. I guess I’ll take a handful of these babies here!” He went to grab at the cherry flavored suckers to the right, but Eddie’s hand shot out and directed Richie to the pink ones right next to them.

“Buy bubblegum, it’s easily the best flavor.” Eddie’s face was tinted pink as he started to realize what he just did and how his hand was still on Richie’s, but he definitely wasn’t gonna let it show.

Richie blushed and took a handful of about sixteen, after all, he needs a lot to keep him going throughout the week. “Thanks for the advice, Eds.”

“Anytime,” Eddie squeaked.

They stood in silence for a few seconds before Richie nodded his head over to the cash registers. “Any chance you’ll check me out of this place?”

“Unfortunately, no, but I’ll see you around…” he trailed off and furrowed his eyebrows in the most adorable way possible, “uh, I didn’t get your name.”

“Oh! It’s Richie! Well, it’s Richard but that’s so grossly formal, so, y’know, call me Richie.” He was rambling, he knew that but Eddie’s smile and bright eyes made him nervous.

“Well, Richie, I’ll see you around.”

Richie never felt to pained to watch someone walk away. So, as he walked away after paying $0.50 for sixteen suckers, he swore he’d show back up and ask the boy out. Nobody was going to stop him either.

That was six weeks ago. Every day since then, Richie walked in, talked and poorly flirted with Eddie, then he bought a single bubblegum sucker and then walked out telling himself that he would ask Eddie out the next day. Now, to Richie’s credit, he was actually learning a lot about the smaller man every single day. He found out that he grew up in a small town not too far from Richie’s own, he had no mom but he lived with a wonderful dad that he adored, he was the same age as Richie, and he was gay. That last one made things at least ten times easier for Richie. In return, Richie liked to think that Eddie knew quite a bit about him too. He talked about his parents who worried about him, but he loved them dearly, his struggle to quit cigarettes, his not so glamorous job at a small diner, and that he was bisexual. Meanless to say, Richie felt like he opened up more to Eddie than he had anyone in his whole life and it was only in six short weeks.

Today, Richie once again swore he would ask Eddie out. He would! He just needed the right moment that’s all. He walked into the store and looked over to Stan and smiled. Stan had yet to say more than a few words to him, but he constantly gives Richie this dude are you serious look after Richie sees Eddie. After saying hi to Stan, he turns to the sucker aisle. Sometimes Eddie is down that aisle, other times Richie picks up his sucker and goes on a little hunt for the boy he likes so much. Eddie isn’t down the aisle today, so Richie figures he’d grab his bubblegum sucker and leave, but there wasn’t any. The only suckers left were cherry and grape, the flavors Richie grew to find disgusting thanks to various conversations with Eddie.

Richie was just about to turn around and find Eddie but he didn’t need to look far. Eddie was standing right behind him in casual clothes, ones that Richie almost full on swooned over, and he held two handfuls of bubblegum suckers. He had a warm blush spread across his cheeks and a nervous smile that Richie believed to be the cutest thing.

“Um,” Eddie squeaked out, “you’re gonna think this is stupid…”

“No no!” Richie cried out, “please continue.”

Eddie snorted and walked closer to him, “well, I have no script planned out but I was really hoping you’d go out with me tonight…”

Now it was Richie’s turn to blush from head to toe.

“It’s just that… We talk every day and I liked you since the day I met you, I’ve been kind of beating myself up over not asking you out sooner, ha. So… What do you say?”

Richie looked at him completely dumbfounded, yeah, he really liked Eddie but he definitely didn’t expect Eddie to like him back! That stuff only exists in the movies, yet here it is happening to little ol’ Richie Tozier.

Maybe he shouldn’t have been silent for too long though, “unless you don’t like me back! Oh god did I misread everything-”

“Oh fuck no!” Richie cried out, “I’ve been trying to ask you out for… literally a month, I really fucking like you!”

Eddie smiled at him and let out a loud sigh of relief, “so, are you free tonight?”

Richie smiled and plucked a sucker from Eddie’s hands, “for you, Eds, I’m always free.

[eddieeatsass]

15 + 28 for reddie from the prompt list

Turned Evil/Dark Au + Wearing the Other’s Clothes from this prompt list

(I took this in a slightly different direction than was probably expected. I tried to take an interesting spin on things, and I hope it worked out. This was super fun to write, thanks for the great prompt combo!)

Posted on AO3

To us, a mirror was just a mirror; a reflective surface used to primp ourselves in the morning and make sure we don’t have food stuck in our teeth after supper. But what if it were more than that? What if it were a gateway into an alternate dimension, where everything was the same, yet completely different.

Most of us would never get an answer to that question, it would remain a conspiracy theory for ages to come. But a select few might occasionally catch a glance into that other reality, moments they’d write off as ‘too much coffee’ or ‘not enough sleep’.

In our world, we can confidently say that we don’t yet have the technology to travel dimensions, let alone prove the existence of multiple dimensions in the first place. However, we can’t say the same with certainty for our potential doppelgangers on the other side.

“Who said you could go first, fuck nut!?” Richie grabbed at Eddie’s hair, pulling back with a hard yank and pushing in front of him.

“Seniority privileges. Plus it keeps me from having to look at your ugly mug.” Eddie stuck out his foot, successfully tripping Richie and watching him topple through the mirror. Eddie followed through the liquid glass, stepping around Richie’s body and taking a look around the room.

It looked about the same as their own, only disgustingly cleaner. One of them definitely had a stick up their ass in this universe.

“I’m only two months younger than you, you idiot.” Richie ground out, reaching out and grabbing Eddie’s ankle, laughing as he watched him hit the ground just as Richie had.

Eddie rolled over, looking back at Richie with a glare and a loud shushing noise.

“Unless you wanna wake them up, I’d suggest you keep your trashmouth closed for once.” Eddie gestured up to the bed where this universe’s versions of themselves were sound asleep.

Richie rolled his eyes, pushing himself up and beginning to look around the room.

A few hours ago, they’d been bored enough to actually consider dimension hopping for the first time ever. It had never really appealed to them before, the process seemed so long and dull, but they’d had nothing better to do. So now here they found themselves, still bored out of their skulls, but now having to be quiet about it.

“Oooo score.” Richie swiped some change off the bedside table, pocketing it for later and continuing to rummage through drawers as quietly as he could.

Eddie was looking through the closet, trying to hold back a gag at the sight of brightly colored gaudy button ups and prissy polo shirts. With a wicked grin, he threw on an over-sized Hawaiian shirt over his black t-shirt, and tiptoed over to Richie.

“Hiya Eds.” Eddie mocked in a low tone, draping himself over Richie’s back and creeping his hands up his chest teasingly. When Richie turned around he slapped a hand over his mouth to hold in his eruption of laughter, coated heavily with disdain.

“That’s horrendous.” Richie said, once he managed to calm himself down enough to whisper again.

“I have half a mind to burn their entire closet, and subsequently, them along with it.” Eddie sneered, pulling the fabric away from his body with his thumb and forefinger.

“From the sight of how big that is on your bite-sized frame-”

“Fuck you.”

“I’d guess that’s my shirt?”

“I guess in this universe you’ve accepted those unfortunate looks of yours and have given up trying all together.”

Richie flattened his hand against Eddie’s face and pushed him out of the way, walking towards the closet as Eddie stumbled to keep from falling over.

“Your clothes aren’t any better.” Richie commented, crinkling his nose as he came across a particularly preppy dress shirt. It was pastel pink with gold adornments on the tips of the collar, and obviously child-sized.

Richie pulled his sweater over his head, letting it drop to the floor before trying to shimmy his way into the dress shirt. It ripped almost immediately, a large tear across the back, and Richie heard Eddie snickering from where he watched.

“Shut up or I’ll stuff my cock down your throat and make you.” Richie shot back, giving up on the shirt and letting it join his sweater on the floor.

“You say that like your cock isn’t the size of a cocktail wiener.”

“People have died from choking on cocktail wieners.” Richie responded, picking through the closet once again.

“You can’t kill me here, there’d be too much evidence.”

“Not if I take goody-two-shoes Eddie back with me. Then it just looks like Richie and Eddie here got into a little marital tussle and one snapped. Remember, you do look identical.”

Eddie rolled his eyes. “Good luck getting him to do the things I do in bed.” He mumbled.

“You know, it might be nice having someone submissive for once. Someone who isn’t keen on arguing with me the whole time, who will let me do anything I want to him.” Richie had stalked towards Eddie, closing the distance between them and bringing them nose to nose. They stood at the foot of the bed where their counterparts lay blissfully unaware in slumber.

“Oh, you want a submissive huh?” Eddie began fiddling with the button on his jeans, keeping his eyes locked on Richie’s in challenge. ”You want me to let you win? Because that’s the only way you could actually dominate me. But if that’s what you want, I’ll take pity on you.” Eddie pulled his pants down around his thighs, bending over the bed frame and presenting his ass to Richie.

Richie growled as he grabbed Eddie’s cheeks, pulling him backwards against his lap and grinding his clothed cock into Eddie’s skin.

“You pathetic slut, I’m going to make you eat your fucking words.”

Eddie made a fake yawning gesture, looking back over his shoulder with an unimpressed expression.

“I’ll believe you when I feel it.” Eddie challenged.

Richie was pulling down his own pants within seconds, grabbing at his cock and teasing Eddie’s hole with it.

“I should make you take it raw for that bullshit you were spouting, but your screaming might wake the babies, and then no one would get to have fun.” Richie let a line of spit trickle from his mouth down to Eddie’s hole, wetting the area significantly less than lube would, but more than nothing. Then, without any warning, he shoved himself in to the hilt.

Eddie straightened up suddenly, the pain shooting through his spine causing him to go rigid. He bit into his lip to keep his scream held in, tasting copper on his tongue from the force. He felt like he was being split open, Richie’s cock a saw blade that wouldn’t relent enough to give him a moment to adjust. Tears sprung to his eyes from the pain, but it also caused arousal to stir low in his stomach.

“Is that all you’ve got?” Eddie spat. He earned a hand around his throat in response, cackling as the sound got cut off.

“Huh? What was that?” Richie whispered wickedly into Eddie’s ear. “I couldn’t hear you over the sound of your ass devouring my cock.”

Eddie tried to bite back a response, but the sound wouldn’t pass by the hold Richie had on his neck. Choked out moans got knocked out of him every time Richie thrust into him, hitting that delicious spot that made his hazy eyes see stars.

Richie brought his free hand up to Eddie’s mouth, forcing his fingers between his lips and hooking two into his cheek like a fish hook. It forced Eddie’s mouth open, drool collecting around Richie’s fingers and dripping down Eddie’s chin.

“Bite my fingers and I stop.” Richie warned, knowing Eddie well enough to speak before he tried anything.

Eddie glared at Richie, opting instead to reach back with his arms and claw his nails down Richie’s exposed back. Richie hissed at the sensation, knowing full well that Eddie wasn’t holding back. He’d probably drawn blood… Richie made a note to punish him for that later.

Eddie’s moans became more frequent as he climbed towards his peak, still kept quiet by the hand around his throat and the fingers in his mouth. But Richie was also approaching his release, and he needed both his hands for it.

With reluctance, Richie pulled his hands away, moving one from the front of Eddie’s neck to the back and using the leverage to push Eddie’s upper half down against the bed. It was risky, having Eddie so close to the sleeping pair, but the risk is what pushed Richie over the edge.

He quickly pulled out of Eddie and grasped his cock at the base, pumping himself through his orgasm as he shot thick ropes of cum across the back of the shirt Eddie wore. His seed quickly disappeared among the busy pattern.

Below him, Eddie was cursing him out quietly. Richie didn’t pay him much mind, not caring if he’d cum or not. He’d been a brat and brats don’t get to finish.

“Get yourself off if you’re so worried about it.” Richie said cattily, tucking himself back into his pants.

Just as Eddie was about to respond, he felt a shuffling underneath him. He shot up from where he’d been bent over the bed, pulling up his pants in the process as he stumbled back into Richie.

Before them appeared a drowsy Richie, sat upright in bed with his eyes nearly shut. He seemed to be looking straight at them, but also straight through them.

“Eds? Why are you wearing my shirt?” He mumbled confusedly.

Eddie stared in horror, glancing between his Richie and the Richie that was a moment away from finding out about inter-dimensional travelling.

“Uh… go back to sleep, this is just a dream.” Eddie tried, cringing at his own cliche line.

Richie blinked at them for a moment.

“If this is a dream, can I have sex with other me?”

“Sure, you idiot, now lay down.” Other Richie replied.

“I like it when I talk dirty to myself.” His speech was sleep slurred as he laid back down, resting his head on his pillow and stilling after a few seconds, his breath evening back out.

Eddie let out a shaky breath, turning to his Richie and raising an eyebrow.

“You’re even stupider in this universe than you are in our own.” He accused.

“Yeah, well, if you don’t get your ass back into our universe in the next five seconds, I’m leaving you here to deal with dumb me, so let’s go.” Richie grumbled, picking up his discarded sweater on his way towards the mirror.

Eddie joined him, prepared to jump back through until Richie stopped him with a hand to his chest.

“Leave the shirt.”

“Wha- but it’s a souvenir!” Eddie objected.

“This isn’t fucking Disney World. And besides, wouldn’t you rather leave a mysterious cum stained shirt here; stir up some trouble for the happy couple?”

Richie’s eyes shone dark, malevolence expanding his pupils. Eddie smirked back at him, his previously neglected cock stirring once again at Richie’s ill nature.

“I like how you think.” Eddie peeled the shirt off, making sure it landed in a bundle where the quickly drying stain would soon be visible, front and center.

And with that, Richie took Eddie’s hand, walking them back through the mirror and back to their own lives.