#now that this is posted its time to nap dfsg

[fullmetalscullyy]

the way it was - chapter 39

summary: what if riza never went to war? riza hawkeye has just married the man she loves. six months into their marriage, an unexpected surprise stops her from following roy to the military. a canon divergence au that explores what might have happened had riza been unable to join the military. there will be plenty of family fluff, angst, and royai.

rated: m | warnings: graphic depictions of violence (updated)

read on ao3

1915

so keep breathing

'cause i'm not leaving you anymore

believe it

hold on to me and never let me go 

Riza was drifting away from the brown brick room as her husband’s arms rocked her from side to side. His desperate, anguished demands for her to return to him immediately were fading as darkness encroached on her mind and a heavy weight settled upon her limbs.

“No,” he choked out, so close to her ear, but so out of reach. “Riza, please.”

It was killing her to leave him like this. She didn’t want to, but that decision had been made for her by someone else. Riza hated it. She had so much more to give in the world, so much more to experience with her family, and now it had all been ripped away. Roy would be left with their children all alone, and she’d never get to see them again. If she could feel anything, or react in any way, Riza would have burst into tears.

“I love you.” Those three words were filled with such defeat and grief. “From the bottom of my heart.”

It was like he was saying goodbye.

Behind closed eyelids there was a spark of light, reminiscent of a candle flickering out in a breeze. It was brief but whatever it was made every sensation and feeling come crashing back into Riza. It slammed into her roughly, almost making her gasp. If her body hadn’t been so sluggish, she would have.

Where sound had been muted and muffled before, it was loud and clear. She heard someone gasp and crackles of alchemic energy. Blue light flashed beyond her closed lids, brighter than before, as the sounds of fighting surrounded her. With eyes squeezed tightly closed, Riza returned to a painful reality. Her features twisted into a grimace, however, what was once a breath-taking agony was now just a dull ache, an occasional throb, accompanying every beat of her heart. It felt like Riza could feel every rush of blood through her veins in the injured skin of her neck.

Before she could even open her eyes, arms lifted and pulled her into a tight embrace. The pressure was intense as Riza struggled to get her bearings, causing another pulse of pain to flare unexpectedly in her neck.

“Oh, thank God.”

Although disorientated, she recognised Roy’s voice. He was by her ear as he pressed his face into her hair. A kiss was pressed against her head as relief flooded through Riza’s body.

“Careful!” a voice scolded suddenly. “If you squeeze too tight, you’ll reopen that wound!”

The arms around her loosened immediately. Riza blinked a few times to clear her vision and saw Roy looking down at her neck in horror. However, as soon as her head tipped to get a better view of him, Roy’s eyes jerked to hers. Despite his red and puffy eyes, a choked laugh left him before a wobbly smile spread across his face. Riza returned his smile with a tiny, tired one of her own and it caused all of the tension in his body to visibly fizzle out.

Slowly, and more gently, Roy embraced her, holding her body close to his. Riza relished in the comfort he always brought her as her eyelids fluttered closed. Her fingers twitched, wishing to grasp onto him in some way, but wouldn’t cooperate just yet.

“Thank you.” Roy’s voice was sincere and hoarse as he spoke to someone nearby. “I owe you one.”

A young girl smiled at him as Riza opened her eyes. She was the same girl who’d been with Scar earlier, during the initial standoff with Envy.

“Don’t mention it,” she replied with determination.

The girl’s voice sounded slightly familiar, but Riza couldn’t place it…

“Mei Chang,” she greeted cheerily. “Nice to meet you properly!”

“Hello,” Riza replied in a raspy voice. Clearing her throat didn’t shift it completely, but it did assist a little. “Thank you for your help.”

She nodded, her smile bright and happy. “It’s good to see you escaped from Envy relatively unharmed.”

Riza paused.

“From Envy?” Roy voiced the question that was floating around Riza’s mind.

Mei nodded. “In Central, in the car. I saw you run after I made them stop.”

Roy exhaled loudly and sharply at the reminder.

Her head dipped, her smile falling from her face as sorrow took over. “Envy tricked me, and I let them go.” When she lifted her head, Mei’s eyes were filled with unshed tears. “That almost cost you earlier. I’m so sorry.” Her head bowed sharply in apology.

Riza could place Mei’s voice now. She’d been the one to call out to Envy while they were all in the car, before Riza made a run for it.

“Mei?” The girl lifted her head slowly and regretfully. “It’s okay,” Riza reassured her. “I’m here, aren’t I? I’m all right.”

“But you’re not. You were hurt!”

“And you helped bring me back,” she reminded her kindly. “I’ll be forever grateful to you for that.”

“Me too,” Roy interjected. “Thank you for saving her life.”

Still looking conflicted, Mei nodded and blinked away a few stray tears. “I’m just glad you’re okay. Make sure you’re careful with her!” she commanded Roy.

“I will,” Roy vowed. “I promise.” His grip tightened just a fraction as his head turned to look back down at Riza. Relief was palpable within him. It shook his arms as he cradled Riza’s body close.

“You got my signal,” she smiled tiredly.

“Of course I did.” His lips lowered to press against her forehead lightly. “We’ve been together for so long, and I’ve become quite attuned to you, remember?” His quip caused a smile to appear as Riza remembered him saying the same thing at Mia’s birthday party. He caressed the skin of her face lovingly. His thumb ran from her temple down to her chin before his hand latched on to support her weight once more. “Plus, I knew you really would kill me if I tried to perform human transmutation.”

Riza let out a quiet snort. “You bet your ass I would have.”

With tears in his eyes, Roy barked a laugh before lowering his lips to hers. He pressed hard enough to convey his relief, but gentle enough to be mindful of her injuries. After another quick peck, he pulled away. His smile wavered with his emotions, but Roy still stared down at her with adoration. The backs of his knuckles caressed Riza's cheekbone lightly, and his loving affection caused her to relax further into his arms.

“I love you, Riza.” He pressed a chaste kiss to her cheek before hugging her tightly once more, yet still being mindful of her condition. “God, I love you," he breathed in a hoarse voice.

He couldn’t seem to let her go, but Riza didn’t mind one bit. It was what they both needed, and was long overdue after the day they'd experienced. She let out a quiet sigh as her eyelids drooped closed and her stomach fluttered. Riza took a moment to rest and get her breath back while Roy curled his body protectively around hers. It felt like she was home, lying there in the warmth of his embrace. Although it was impossible given the circumstances, she never wanted to leave that moment.

Roy's breathing evened out, the action seemingly becoming easier for him as more time progressed. Finally, he let loose a long sigh and pulled away.

“What now?” She didn’t want to be the one to break the little bubble they’d fallen into, but regretfully, the day was not over, nor was the fight.

Roy let out another breath in a rush. “We’re regrouping. We’ve got a little time.”

Slowly and painfully she was assisted into a seated position.

“Easy,” Roy murmured, hovering over her. His grip was encouraging and strong, essentially keeping her upright, however his hands trembled and shifted in place, trying to find the best way to support her further as he fretted.

“I’m okay. I’m good.” Riza sighed, feeling neck twinge as her shoulders rolled. “Any news on Edward?”

Roy’s lips pursed and he shook his head. “Nothing.”

Riza’s stomach lurched at the thought of them not knowing where he’d disappeared to. The word “sacrifice” made her shudder, and she did not like when it was applied to Edward Elric.

She squeezed his hand in comfort. “Then we look for him.”

Roy nodded, but Riza picked up on his swallow and how he averted his eyes to the ground.

“What’s wrong?” Her blood ran cold, thinking the worst.

“It’s –” Roy sighed heavily. On the exhale, his eyes were filled with grief. “I almost lost you today. I watched you die,” Roy choked out.

Riza’s heart thudded inside her chest. Memories of Roy screaming her name, cursing those who’d hurt her, and claiming that he would kill them all for what they did, flooded her mind. He’d watched her slip away, been restrained, and unable to help or hold her close. It had broken him. She’d heard his agony, filling her ears as she slipped away from reality.

“I can’t have you being used against me.” He pressed his lips against her hairline, kissing her fiercely. Riza’s eyes fluttered closed in response. “I won’t let them,” he whispered against her skin as his voice hitched.

He'd never wanted Riza to get involved in any of this. It was highly likely he'd want to get her somewhere safe, away from the forefront of the battle –

“I almost watched you die –” Roy choked on his own words, cutting himself off with a strangled gasp. Riza could feel his hands beginning to shake as they held onto her even tighter.

The full weight of what had transpired was finally hitting him.

“Roy?”

He didn’t seem to hear her.

“Roy,” she called louder. She lifted a shaky hand to press it against his cheek. He jumped, turning his head to face her, tears close to falling.

“I’m right here,” she reminded him. “I’m not going to die on you. I’ve got two kids waiting for me to come home. So do you.”

Roy sucked in a sharp breath.

“We’ll go home to them together,” she affirmed.

She was bundled up in his arms once more. Riza clutched at his back desperately. She clung to him, burying her face in his jacket. She never wanted to let him go. Riza needed only a comfort he could bring her.

As she moved to pull away, Roy restricted her gently.

“Pl – Please. Not just yet,” he whispered against her shoulder. His hand made its way to the back of her head, holding her tight in place. Roy's fingers tangled in her hair and it made Riza hold on even tighter. “I… I just need a minute.”

“I can give you a minute,” she breathed, swallowing the lump in her throat. Riza buried her face in the fabric of his black coat. “Take all the time you need.”

“I feel like this is your line,” Roy chuckled humourlessly. It held a bitterness that made Riza’s heart ache. Her fingers increased their pressure on his back. “But thank you for coming back to me,” he whispered into her ear.

“Always, Roy."

Shifting in place, he moved so their foreheads could bow together.

“I love you.” It was whispered like a prayer as Roy’s breath mingled and entwined with her own.

“Love you too. Thank you for trusting me.”

“Always,” Roy repeated back to her. He placed a quick kiss against her hairline, his hand cupping her cheek, before his head moved to rest against hers once more.

Returning to the present, Roy lifted his head to look around the room and assess where they were at. Riza followed suit, eyes wandering to see if everyone was accounted for.

The first thing she spied was the trail of blood leading from the circle. Her blood. She had images of Roy dragging her fading form out of the circle, leaving a streak of red in his wake. Riza shuddered.

Scar and the chimeras were standing over the downed candidates, speaking lowly. Riza’s eyes roved over the bodies but came to a jarring halt when they settled upon the man she’d killed. Her stomach twisted and horror flushed through her body.

“How are you feeling?”

Roy’s question distracted her, and Riza felt selfish and cruel enough to be thankful for it.

You killed him.

“Sore,” she admitted after clearing her throat. Her eyes were torn away from her kill, but Roy noticed her body stiffen and the jerky movement. Of course he did.

A gloved hand cupped Riza’s cheek lightly to angle her head, so she was facing him. “You saved my life.” His eyes held no revulsion or apprehension in them, just sympathy and unfortunate understanding.

“I killed him,” she whispered. The words got caught in her throat and almost choked her.

“I know.” His tone was sombre, but he didn’t flinch away from her gaze filled with shame and disgust. “I know, and I’m so sorry it came to that –”

“Colonel?” One of the chimeras called over to them – Darius, Riza remembered. “You all right?”

Roy nodded and returned his attention to her. “We’ll discuss this.” His lips pressed against her temple. “I promise. You won’t have to deal with this alone.”

Riza winced multiple times as Roy helped her to her feet. His arm circled around her back and pulled her body close to his, taking most of her weight. With an arm braced on the shoulder of her uninjured side, they started to walk towards the group.

“Everyone, thank you for all of your help.”

“No problem,” Darius reassured. He angled his head to look around Roy, eyeing Riza to assess her condition.

Mei had disappeared from their side as she and Roy spoke, but now she skipped over to the group. “Oh wait –” She halted suddenly, looking around the floor of the room. “The stone!”

Lying among the candidates was a clear vial, filled with red liquid. However, before anyone could move, the darkness shifted.

Fuhrer Bradley.

He emerged from the shadows and bent at the waist, his movements calm and controlled, picking up the vial that Mei had been searching for.

“King Bradley,” Roy greeted, hostility clouding his tone. “His wounds aren’t regenerating,” he realised, almost speaking to himself. Riza glanced to Bradley’s arm, noticing the trail of blood.

“It’s been quite some time hasn’t it, Colonel Mustang?”

“Indeed it has, sir. I’m afraid I’d be lying if I said you were looking as good as ever.”

Riza was close to elbowing Roy to tell him to knock it off. He didn’t need to provoke Bradley further.

The Fuhrer’s eye shifted away from Roy and settled on Riza. It narrowed dangerously and she felt the sudden urge to take a step back. His stare pinned her in place, like he’d done before, and it made the hairs on the back of Riza’s neck stand on end. Roy noticed too. She was pulled tighter into his body protectively.

“Knowing that weakling heart of yours, I thought the imminent threat to your wife’s life would have made you perform human transmutation, Mustang. I would’ve thought you’d do anything to save her, but it appears that isn’t the case.”

“I would do whatever it takes to ensure her safety, and my family’s,” Roy fired back, irritated by the insinuation that he wouldn’t. Indignation flared in Riza’s chest too. “However, I made a promise and intended to keep it. I may have been reckless enough at one point, but luckily I have people behind me to keep me on the right path. I trust them,” he gave her upper arm a squeeze, “and I wasn’t about to let them down.”

Bradley continued to talk as a wave of light-headedness overcame Riza. She blinked as she tried to focus on the conversation, but it faded. The world around her was muted for a brief second.

Keep it together, Riza.

It was hard. Her knees shook but were quickly locked so she didn’t fall. Her thighs quivered with overexertion and her injuries, but she held firm. She had to.

Blinking heavily, Riza felt her body pitch forward against her will. Her arm lifted to grip onto something connected to Roy to help her remain upright, but she needn’t have worried. Roy had already caught her with a hand to the shoulder closest to him. Eyes wide, he silently asked if she was all right. Riza gripped his forearm tightly for support, giving him a tiny nod. With a shifted stance, he pulled her closer to his body and turned back towards Bradley.

“No!” There was a sudden cry from the doctor in the pipes above. Riza had forgotten he was there. “I won’t let you interfere with him!”

“Give it up Doctor,” Jerso scoffed. “You’re not going anywhere.”

Suddenly, Mei gasped from behind Riza. There was a splash as blood reigned from the ceiling, spreading out into the stone, and mingling with her own blood. Jerso fell and crashed hard onto the floor while she turned in place to see what the sudden commotion was, and the doctor followed suit. Both grunted in pain, rolling away from the centre of the room.

“Jerso!” Zampano called to his friend, urging him to stand.

“Run! Get out of here!” Jerso’s warning made Riza’s heart leap into her throat.

“This is bad.” Darius ran over to Jerso, helping him stand so he and Zampano could move their injured friend somewhere safe.

“He’s right,” Mei agreed. “Something’s coming. Something awful.”

Riza waited with bated breath, wondering what new thing was approaching. She didn’t know if she could survive another fight; not in her current condition.

Long, black tendrils descended from the ceiling. Eyes opened once the shapes finally landed on the ground, peering into the room, with a small boy standing in the centre.

“Pride,” Riza whispered.

“Please,” Roy requested, talking over her head. She was pressed into the arms of Darius. Her head started to turn, but it was on her injured side. It didn’t move very far, and instead she had to close her eyes tightly against the sudden wave of pain. “Look after her for now.”

She mourned the loss of Roy's touch and his support, but Darius gracefully swept her up with his own strength.

There was a burst of movement but Riza barely had a chance to open her eyes to comprehend what was happening properly. Bradley was charging at Roy, who’d sprang away from them and sent a ball of flame at the Fuhrer. But Bradley was too fast. He’d leaped into the air and dodged Roy’s retaliation all together.

Riza watched in terror as Bradley’s feet connected with Roy’s torso. With the force of his jump, Bradley sent him crashing backwards onto the hard stone, Roy’s body skidding along it with the momentum. He grunted loudly in pain. Bradley’s swords came crashing down into the palm of Roy’s hands, piercing through his flesh, and pinning him in place. He let out a muffled scream, his jaw clenched tight as his eyes widened. They were fraught with suffering and pain.

“Roy!” The cry was ripped from Riza’s throat before she could think. Her whole body tensed. Everything locked in place as she watched, unable to tear her eyes away from Roy’s hands. She saw the sword poking through the back of his palms as his body heaved with pained breaths. Riza immediately felt like she wanted to vomit, but her body wouldn’t move or react.

A shadow lashed out at her, causing Darius to lift Riza off her feet so they could both jump backwards. More distance was put between them and that was the opposite of what Riza wanted.

Now she knew how Roy had felt just a few minutes ago.

Her legs and feet weren’t cooperating. She wanted to run to him, to shoot the bastard pinning him to the ground through the palms of his hands. Even if she could get her legs to work, Darius would never let her go. His grip on her upper arms was too strong.

Pride stabbed the doctor through the chest. The sudden cry of disbelief and pain managed to pierce through the fog inside Riza’s mind. Inky black tendrils wrapped around the doctor, covering his mouth to silence him. As Pride did so, at the same time underneath Roy, a circle formed.

A transmutation circle.

“Well, Colonel Mustang, it looks like you are our fifth.”

“That’s right,” Bradley added, “the last one.”

Pride smirked to himself as he watched the doctor squirm, but his expression quickly turned back to cold and calculating. He was nothing like the young boy she’d spoken to in the university, months prior, who’d been so excited to meet the wife of the Flame Alchemist. When Riza had first met Pride, not Selim, she’d never seen him, only felt the threatening presence of his black tendrils around her throat. It was unsettling to know this homunculus had been hiding beneath the surface of that innocence, performing so perfectly with the face and personality of a young boy all this time.

Roy’s eyes widened in fear as blue light filled the circle, reaching high into the air above him. The doctor, wrapped up in Pride’s tendrils, was moved above Roy as he writhed inside them, his cries muffled.

“I was really hoping we wouldn’t have to resort to this but there is no choice. We’ve run out of time now,” Pride announced coldly.

“Whether you like it or not, we’re going to force you to open the portal, Mustang. Prepare yourself.”

“No, I won’t do it!” Roy grit his teeth together as his jaw clenched tightly in pain. His eyes briefly squeezed closed as Bradley leaned over him further and put more pressure on the blades. He must have shifted them a fraction.

“As I said,” Bradley replied coolly, “it doesn’t matter if you don’t want to. Pride has just assimilated an alchemist who possesses knowledge of human transmutation. He has the necessary formula.”

Pride’s tendrils lifted from the ground wrapped around Roy’s neck. He grunted as they secured themselves and Riza inhaled sharply as she watched, remembering how they’d felt on her skin months ago. The blue light was getting brighter and another wrapped around each of Roy’s ankles and across his stomach, securing him in place for their plan.

“He’s safely pinned, move back, Wrath. Now.”

Bradley stood and walked calmly away, as if he were taking a stroll down the street, not condemning a man to an unknown fate.

Riza stared at her husband lying in the middle of the transmutation circle. She couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe. They were forcing him to open the gate against his will.

The bastards.

He was stuck. The tables had been turned on them completely, and now she was the one who was unable to help him, as he was trapped and about to be harmed.

Roy’s chest heaved as he breathed. His hands shook against his restraints, fighting it, but Riza knew all too well how futile that fight was. He wouldn’t escape from Pride’s hold.

The muscles in her neck shook as her head turned due to her distress. It felt as though they were creaking as she did so. Riza’s eyes moved to Roy’s and they met for a brief second. He inhaled and they widened, his eyebrows turning upwards helplessly.

His eyes were filled with terror.

“No…” she whispered, not removing her gaze from his. She couldn’t.

Bradley coughed twice, lifting a hand to his mouth as he partially turned back to look at Roy.

“I wonder… What will be taken from you in exchange, Colonel Mustang?”

The bastard almost smirked.

The light grew to a crescendo and Riza had never felt more helpless in her life as Roy screamed. It was nothing like Riza had ever heard before, or ever wanted to hear again. It cut right through her, leaving her winded. It shook Riza to her core.

Everyone turned away from the transmutation, the light too bright for their eyes to handle, but not Riza. She couldn’t. Her husband was being forced through the gate, into the unknown, against his own will. Edward and Alphonse flashed into her mind. Edward, losing an arm and a leg to this same transmutation. Alphonse, losing his entire body.

What would Roy lose?

“Roy!” His name was torn from her throat as the transmutation reached its peak, the sudden brightness blinking out in a flash. It left a ringing in her ears, along with the echo of his screams, but Riza didn’t even notice. Her eyes were impossibly wide, tears springing to her lids, because Roy was no longer in the centre of the circle.

He was gone.

Riza’s mouth never closed. She wanted to vomit, could feel it stirring up inside her stomach and begging to be let loose onto the floor below, but it didn’t. Completely frozen, her mind didn’t want to comprehend what she was seeing. He couldn’t be gone. He couldn’t disappear.

But he had.

*      *      *

Darius had lowered Riza to the ground gently and remained close by as everyone involved in the coup regrouped. He was obviously worried about her mental state but Riza didn’t have it in her to reassure him, or anyone else. She was exhausted. She was completely uneasy, not knowing what had happened to Roy or if he was okay. Bradley had assured he was alive, but at what cost? It made her heart ache the more she thought about it.

What would he lose?

She was supposed to have been watching his back, but he’d been hurt. He’d been taken. Riza knew she was no match against a homunculus, never mind two, but still… She’d made a promise to look out for him. As worn down as she was, that tiny detail was weighing on her most. She should have fought more. She should have pulled out her gun and shot Bradley like she’d so desperately wanted to - 

Her eyelids fluttered closed. A single tear threatened to escape and fall down her cheek. Riza ignored it. Anxiety and terror were creating a dangerous cocktail of emotions within her, alongside her overall fatigue, and refused to let up. Riza knew they wouldn’t until there was some news. She’d take any news at this point. Whatever Roy had paid as a toll, they’d work through it. So long as he was alive, that was enough for Riza at the moment.

Riza felt numb right up until there was the sound of shaking beneath her. A deep rumble filled the air, cutting through her chest uncomfortably, as loose stones shook with the vibrations beside her. Riza was shielded from debris as a young man burst forth from the ground, continuing his journey up towards the surface, unbothered by those beneath him. Riza had watched on, hopeful for news about Roy, Edward, about anyone who’d been taken as a sacrifice. Her heart leapt into her throat as she watched the newcomer ascend through the gap in Darius’ arms, but no news arrived.

Once it had stopped, there was silence, and it settled heavily on Riza’s heart once more.

“Are you okay?”

Riza glanced up at Darius and gave him a tired nod. He was unconvinced, but he reassured he’d be right back after checking on everyone else. The ground was still trembling, causing Darius to lose his balance twice as he quickly approached the group to find out what was happening.

“Izumi!”

Startled out of her reverie, Riza glanced over to see Sig Curtis embrace his wife, who was standing on a tower of stone in the shape of a hand. Behind her, sat –

Roy.

He was on his knees, staring at the ground. He looked… Riza couldn’t tell. Sig blocked her view before she could determine his expression. Riza’s posture straightened as she tried to lean around them, but it was futile. Her neck protested painfully at the sudden jerky movement.

Izumi asked her husband to look after Roy, and Riza watched as Roy’s brow furrowed in concentration while Sig helped him stand. Upon first glance he was fine physically. There were no lost limbs or visible injuries on his body, apart from a few scrapes on his face. Riza let out a shaky breath of relief.

“Roy!”

“Riza?” Roy’s head perked up immediately and turned in her direction.

Sig murmured lowly, indicating he should step down onto the ground. Roy’s steps were hesitant and clumsy. Did something happen to his legs? Why was he –?

Realising what was wrong, her elation faltered. His eyes… They were no longer that rich, dark colour she loved so much; the same eyes he shared with their daughter. They were muted in colour, almost grey.

“Are you there?” Roy’s head swung from side to side, searching for her agitatedly, but his eyes were unfocussed… unseeing…

Why couldn’t he see her?

“Over here, Colonel,” Sig answered.

Sig lowered him to the ground gently before Riza, who promptly threw her arms around his neck. She felt him jump in fright, but Roy relaxed immediately when he realised who it was. His hands lifted to wrap around her torso as his face was buried in the crook of her neck, on her good side. Riza heard him take a deep breath as she clutched at the back of his head, holding him as close as she could. The exhale tickled her skin, warming it, and Riza was thankful to be able to feel such a thing.

“You’re okay,” she gasped in elation. She pressed her face into his shoulder, grateful for that fact. With every trip to the gate a toll must be paid, Riza knew this, but for now, it was enough to see him walking, talking and visibly unharmed. He was alive. Whatever had been taken, they’d work through it together.

“I’m all right,” Roy reassured quietly, giving her a tight squeeze in their embrace.

“What happened?” Her lips were right by his ear, so she spoke softly enough for only him to hear.

Roy stiffened underneath her touch and she felt another sigh against her skin.

“I went through the gate.” It was mumbled against her skin, the vibrations tickling her. “I saw Truth. I…”

“What is it?” Her urging was gentle, but anxiety and fear were churning up inside her stomach painfully as anticipation lifted the hair on her arms.

“I lost my eyesight. I’m blind.”

Riza pulled away in shock, blinking at him, and resting her hands upon his shoulders. Roy's head tilted downwards, his fringe falling over his eyes. When it lifted, his expression was one of determination.

“Blind?”

“Riza, what is the extent of your injuries?”

She blinked at him, then her expression crumpled with the weight of everything they'd been through. “What is the extent of yours? Please, just worry about yourself for once in your life –!”

“Riza.” His command cut her off, but it was not harsh. “Are you okay? Can you still fight?”

Being caught off guard by his question made Riza pause. The only indication of his anxiety about her answer was the tightening of pressure on her forearms. He’d rested his battered palms there, but Riza started to feel the trembling of his fingers as his concern grew.

“I’m fine,” she replied.

As an afterthought, it didn’t occur to her that he was so worried because he couldn’t see for himself how she was doing physically. He was already on high alert, having her here in the first place, but now, rendered blind and unable to watch her back, he was no doubt feeling increasingly uneasy.

“Can you help me fight?” He softened his tone for her, asking for her assistance. “Can you be my eyes for me?”

“Always,” Riza nodded, ignoring the ache in her neck as the muscles were agitated. “Of course I can. I’ll watch your back,” she affirmed, pressing her palm against his cheek.

“Now, hold on a sec,” a male voice interrupted from above them. “You two are injured. You need to stay down here and out of the way,” Greed argued.

Riza grasped Roy’s wrist tightly as well as his elbow, lifting him from the ground to stand. Once upright, he rolled his shoulders and turned in the direction of the homunculus, Greed. His eyes closed as he spoke, and it made Riza’s heart ache as she watched.

Her feelings regarding his newfound blindness were a mess, a cocktail of dangerous things barrelling around inside of her chest and stomach. She still didn’t even know how he felt about it. But, they still had a fight to finish. They had to win. For the country’s sake and for their children’s future, they must step up. Emotionally dealing with her husband’s new condition could be compacted neatly into a box and shelved for later once she knew they were safe.

“I need her help to control the flames so I can burn up Father’s philosopher’s stone,” Roy argued, his tone absolute. He was not going to give in, and Riza wouldn’t either. “We’re a unit and we’ll deal with this,” he waved a hand at his face haphazardly, “together.”

Greed glared at him, and Riza dared the homunculus to argue with them, but eventually he scoffed and backed down.

“Suit yourself,” he muttered petulantly with a wave of his hand, walking off.

Roy’s shoulders, that had been tensed, relaxed downwards by a considerable amount. A breath was let loose and Riza watched closely, noting how exhausted he looked. The grazes on his face hadn’t broken the skin enough to draw blood, but they still looked like they’d been painful. Roy’s head tipped downwards to the floor as he took a quiet moment to recentre himself.

Stepping up, Riza gently looped her fingers around his wrist. Ideally she would have gripped his hand hard and not let go, but not with those injuries. Roy jumped at the initial contact again, Riza noted forlornly, and he recoiled away from her touch in unease. He turned towards her, eyes open and searching.

“Sorry,” she apologised quietly, retracting her hand.

“Riza?”

Forgetting herself, she nodded as an automatic response. “It’s me,” left her lips in a hurry, amending herself.

Relief settled upon his shoulders, dragging them downwards once more and Roy cracked a smile. His eyes closed as his hand lowered to his side and extended outwards slightly, towards her. Taking that as an invitation, she circled her fingers around his wrist.

“I’m sorry,” Roy replied. “This will take some getting used to.”

“There’s nothing to apologise for,” she reassured, “and I’ll be right by your side.”

“Thank you.” His smile broadened and his expression softened completely.

“Ready?”

Chest heaving with a sigh, Roy nodded as he let it loose. Determination settled in and she couldn’t have been prouder. “I’m ready.”

“Let’s go,” she whispered, giving his wrist an encouraging squeeze.

One of Roy’s hands found her hip. The other lifted into the air with hesitation, ending up hovering in empty space. Realising his intention, Riza guided his hand over to her cheek, and Roy smiled his gratitude. His thumb stroked the skin of her face gently, making sure he avoided touching her with his bloody palm. Slowly, he tried to gauge the distance between them and moved forward to kiss her forehead. Riza’s eyes fluttered closed as he did so. He ended up slightly off centre and almost bumped into her, but Riza didn’t care. None of that mattered.

It would take some getting used to, but they’d do it, just like they did with everything in their lives. Together.

“Let’s finish this,” he breathed against her skin.