#now it doesn't seem like hard labor to me lol

[bansheeso]

A widow.. again

@simandy love this hair with all of my heart 😩💘

[gallusrostromegalus]

Hi Gallus, I'm doing some worldbuilding and you seem like you could be connected enough for me to find an answer to the problem of dwarven agriculture. Many problems are created by the requirement of no sunlight, as even the common response of mushrooms still need light to break down decomposing matter as a primary energy source. Currently, we're thinking that they use a special type of mushroom that breaks down rocks in an energy-producing reaction, giving them enough energy to absorb nutrients and grow - this would serve a second purpose in explaining why building a massive hollowed-out mountain fortress doesn't produce an equally large amount of gravel.

Any thoughts? We're grasping at straws kinda lol

Well, some thoughts:

There's plenty of cave systems (especially Karst Systems) that are at least partially open to Sunlight- especially the kind that have rivers running through them, which is something else that's really helpful for agriculture.

For Example: This Cool AF Sinkhole cave in china that has an entire Forest in it

Now There's a view to put outside the city Gates!

Karst specifically is a landscape where underground rivers hollow out the limestone underground and then the cave roofs fall in. This kind of landscape answers your gravel question nicely: the hollowed out mountain does produce an equal amount of gravel, but the gravel turns up as the sandy banks of the river system hundreds of miles away.

So, there's your sunlight that can be used directly, or reflected or magically transferred deeper into the cave system.

Or they just put more holes in the roof! Unless your dwarves are also vampires, there's no reason for them to not hollow out a few Skylights into the mountain too.

But let's talk some other cave ecology and agriculture!

For starters, your dwarves could be sitting on top of a literal gold mine that would allow them to trade for a lot of needed materials and crops.

And by gold mine, I mean Salt Mine.

Historically, salt comes out of hollowed-out mountains and is worth more than gold.

Also something the humans have historically fought a bunch of wars over, so there's some free political tensions if you needed that!

I can also mean the possible fucking enormous piles of bat guano that accumulates in Karst caves, which is the world's most insanely good fertilizer, and ALSO something that has been worth more than it's weight in gold.

Speaking of Gold, another thing that often lives in sinkhole caves in abundance is BEES. turns out, limestone stalactites are a terrific place to build a hive that is difficult for predators to reach, stays dry and the stone substrate means the hives can reach many tons in weight before they start having structural issues. That sweet, sweet insect-derived liquid gold is already important to Dwarves in a lot of folklore- it's really hard to have a Traditional Dwarven Mead Hall without the honey to make the mead, you know?

So you got your mushrooms, you got your sunlight-grown sinkhole crops, you got your traded goods and you got your source of alcohol- the only thing really missing from an ancient food pyramid here is a staple carbohydrate. To that end, may I propose our good Peruvian Friend: The Potato.

Grain crops aren't actually all that nutritious and were kept around in ancient societies more as legal tender that kept the peasants busy, because wheat or rice takes months to grow, an enormous amount of labor to harvest, and wheat also needs to be milled before it can be turned into food- all enormously time-consuming processes that keep peasants busy and easy to rule tyranically over.

Potatoes though? Pop one in the ground in spring and you can dig up fingerlings all summer, and if you make potato towers, you can harvest up to 40lbs of delicious, easy-to-prepare-and-store carb out of a single plant- a real space-saver for the limited sinkhole skyspace.

If your dwarves have cheese, the potato makes even more sense, because Potato+dairy is the easiest, most nutritionally complete survival food there is.

Finally, consider: Dwarven Vodka.

This post is open for anyone to comment suggestions on, but that's my take: put your dwarves in a Karst-sinkhole cave system, give them a highly in demand resource like salt or guano, bees, and taters. Boom. Whole agriculture, economy and political scheme starters.

[turbulentscrawl]

Some Body Type HCs

Hey ho!! I'm back (kinda maybe). Life has been really hectic, and frankly I just haven't had time to write much. BUT some of the friends I've made through IDV got me back to drawing, so now I have some headcanons WITH VISUALS for you. I'm putting this under the cut for partial nudity on the drawings.

(You'll have to forgive me for making it small and watermarking the hell out of it. I'm paranoid.)

Aesop

-Pale, and not a lot of body hair. Unlike some of the others, this is normal for him. He has trouble growing facial hair, which is a blessing for him because he hates having it almost as much as he hates having to shave.

-Aesop is averse to several textures, and this causes some issues for him at mealtimes. He's more of a grazer, as far as his eating habits go. He's underweight and a bit malnourished as a result of these, and so he has a slight hour-glass shape.

-He's very hyenic. He hates the feeling of lotion on his skin, but he uses good-quality soaps when he bathes, so his skin is fairly soft.

Emil

-Very hairy. (Full disclosure-this hc of mine was born partially as a spiteful counter to those in the fandom who tend to infantize him) Ada shaves his face and neck for him about once a week, but they don't bother with the rest of his body hair.

-Has quite a but of scarring under all that hair, too. His back, wrists, and legs have the worst of it, from old dog attacks and pulling against restraints.

-Not overly muscular, but he is a little stronger than average in the arms and core from his parkour-like hook maneuvering.

Luchino

-The growth of scales across his body have made his body hair sparse and inconsistent. He will still grow some on his chest and legs, but he shaves it off because he doesn't like the patchiness.

-He's health-conscious and, despite his busy schedule, still finds time to work out. He's muscular and lean due partially to this fact, as well as his ongoing mutations keeping his body fat percentages really low.

-For the same reason, aside from the areas with scale growth, Luchino's skin is well-kept. He uses many lotions and balms to ease the itching of said scales, so his entire body is well-moisturized and has a golden, dewy glow.

Norton

-The tallest survivor.

-Lean and lankey. He's strong, but still bulking up after years of near-starvation, so his muscle mass and body fat seem low.

-Has an average amount of body hair. His chest, legs, and arms all have a fair amount. (his head hair and pubes are much thicker) The burn scars left from the accident have prevented hair growth in certain areas of his body. He grows facial hair reasonably fast and has to shave at least every other week.

Andrew

-One of the tallest survivors.

-Vaguely dorito-shaped with broad shoulders. He's quite strong in general, as a result of years of hard labor like digging and throwing about coffins (and corpses). He has some body hair--but less than average--but it is thin and fine, so difficult to see without being up-close. The hair on his head is a bit thin too, he doesn't have much volume there.

-Very pale (obviously.) It's painfully obvious when he blushes--it goes all the way from his ears, down to his belly.

-He has some faint, scattered scarring just from accidents over the years. Nicking himself on sharp wooden edges, his own shovel, etc.

Luca

-Very thin. Luca hyperfocuses on work and forgets to eat a lot, and was malnourished during his time in prison. He's very physically weak.

-He grows very little body hair, and the hair on his head tends to be thin. Not many people know this, but he has a small bald patch from where he worries and pulls at his hair during moments of frustration.

-Has faint electrical scarring across his shoulders, chest, and back. Always has circles under his eyes due to his poor sleep schedule.

Naib

-Bulky and column-shaped. He's very lean and muscular from years in his various services. One of the shortest survivors (as well as one of the widest lol.)

-Covered in various scars. Life's been rough for him.

-He grows a fair amount of body hair, but he shaves it all off. This is something he does as a "leave-no-trace" sort of precaution for work, rather than as an actual preference. He's considered shaving his head, too, but he is a bit fond of his hair for personal reasons. The hair on his head is thick, but a bit dry. He doesn't always have the chance to use good products.

Victor

(My love for Victor has grown exponentially since I took my unintentional break. You heard it here, folks, I have new favorites. ask me about it lol)

-Has a fairly average, fit body type. He doesn't work out, specifically, but does a LOT of walking, running, and hiking so he's in good-standing with his cardio. He has a very slight softness around his tummy and arms, since his legs do the most of the work.

-Has a t-shirt tan from all his time outside. He's very rosey, too. Isn't that blush adorable?

-Has a very small amount of chest hair, and some on his legs. Similar to Andrew, his body hair is fine and difficult to see. He has trouble growing a beard--much to his holiday displeasure.

[beesmygod]

perhaps foolishly throwing my hat in the ring here about cohost developers making 90k/yr (as someone who used cohost for like five minutes but does work in software. although I'm not even close to making SWE-level money lol): depending on your stack, experience, location, other benefits, etc., that's genuinely in the bottom twentieth percentile for engineer salaries at your average startup, if not lower. especially for a "founding engineer who does literally everything"-type role. idk how much experience these people have or what their stack is, but just to guess, at your average seni-marture startup they could easily double that salary, and at a big FAANG company or whatever stupid acronym we're using now they could probably quadruple that, plus or minus whatever part of your comp package is stock instead of actual salary.

there are a couple interesting/relevant reasons I bring this up: (1) at really really early-stage startups, where you only have four guys and a couple hundred grand in the bank, having bottom-twentieth-percentile salaries is normal *because they make up for it by giving you a shitload stock options that will theoretically be worth a lot in the future*, if things ever take off, although of course they rarely do. in cohost's case, it doesn't seem like stocks and shit were part of their long-term plans (which, fair enough, not trying to say they should've been), so in theory the cohost devs were making a lottt less than your average early-stage startup devs, even though overall comp at an early-stage startup is mostly monopoly money.

(2) the other thing is that if the pay is uncompetitive, which it obviously was, then attracting worthwhile talent is really hard. again, idk these devs, they could all genuinely be very good at their jobs. and cohost was clearly a passion project for them. but it makes me wonder if *some* (not all) of their problems stemmed from technical or even positioning/market issues that having more people or more experienced people would've solved, and they just weren't able to hire them. especially since they were doing design work and moderation and other shit in addition to plain old engineering!

I guess my angle here is that unless you see how the sausage is made, it's really really easy to underestimate just how much money (and human labor!) it takes to build anything, and that most projects only manage to pull it off for as long as they do thanks to a near-bottomless supply of venture capital funding. even not-for-profit community projects (which I was considering whether something like cohost could survive as, but even then I'm unsure) rely on corporate sponsorship and free labor from people who are getting paid a lot of money at their day job. so like many of you I am not at all shocked that they're folding—easy to say in hindsight but I definitely say this coming, although maybe not so quickly lol.

but like, even most VC-funded startups fail despite having way better odds and a shitload more money. legit kudos to them for trying anyway, because the only way we get cool shit is if someone's willing to take a risk and maybe fail. that said as a *user* there's still no way I'd hitch my wagon to a fledgling startup unless I was totally okay with that wagon falling into a gulch within 24 months, because that's usually what happens

interesting insight. thanks boss. much to learn about this world that, as an outsider, seems uniquely annoying and stupid to try to navigate

[magnoliaroad]

4 Seasons Back Yard Remodel + Crystal Yard

My 4 seasons remodels of the Petz 5 Back Yard are now available for download! And because I went on a bit of a side-quest, I’ve also made a bonus version, a fantasy, crystal back yard!

You can read my creator's notes below:

I somewhat wonder if it's fair to criticize the original Petz 5 playscenes too harshly. It's possible that the development team faced tight deadlines or budget constraints, factors that may not have been entirely within their control. However, regardless of the circumstances, the end result was a disappointingly sloppy product, and it's difficult to ignore some of the glaring flaws. While I can understand that the developers were working with dated software, there are certain flaws that can't be attributed to software limitations. Rather, they seem to reflect a clear lack of attention to detail. Here's what I mean.

The more you look at it, the harder it is to decide which flaw is the worst. The blatant MS paint spray paint "touch-up" in the upper left, that there was no effort put into blending in the skybox, or that they neglected to add textures to the roof.

Alright, enough ranting there. None of this is to say my playscenes are perfect either, but they were a labor of love and I hope that this is evident in the final results.

SPRING

I smoothed out the grass texture to give it a more velvety, manicured lawn appearance. I brightened up the dingy looking fence to a more brighter white. The original playscene had a hole in the fence, and while it might add "character", I opted to cover over it for a more polished look. I added bushes behind the fence to cover up the skybox and to conceal the bottom of the houses.

Speaking of houses. Wow these needed a big work-up. The texture work (or lack of) on these is just bad. I'm no expert in house construction, but even mostly-brick houses will have some accents like trims to break up the monotony of a fully-brick façade.

Because of how fuzzy the brick texture is in the original, I drew in the mortar lines of the bricks to enhance the texture. I added roof shingles, siding, and trim boards to the house to make it look more like a typical suburban house. Despite these edits, it's still not a "great" house - the way it looks through the windows, it looks like the house is one room lol. I wish I could put better houses in the backdrop but because Tinker doesn't allow me to edit the animated blinds, I'm constrained to keeping them the shape that they are. Oh well. We can use our imagination.

I added landscaping rocks to make the flower bed look nicer. I also added some landscaping details like bushes, garden lights, and string lights for ambiance.

[ Enlarged picture of the garden light I made ]

I also worked to improve the skyboxes in all 4 seasons of the of the Back Yard playscenes. It would be lengthy to get into the details of all that but here's a before and after of the night skybox. You got to love them high-quality MS paint stars in the original.

SUMMER

I had a hard time with the summer one because it was hard to come up with ways to make it look different from the spring version. I did make the grass, bushes, and tree leaves slightly more vibrant. Originally I had some flowers by the bushes but I just wasn't really happy with them. At the last minute, I made the decision to remove them entirely. This makes the playscene a little more "plain" but I think some people may want a more "plain", undecorated version so that they can dress it up how they want with toyz.

FALL

Fall is my favorite season, so this was a joy to make. I toned down the color of the grass and added fall landscaping motifs. Recoloring the tree's leaves was done by using Photoshop's gradient map feature. If time permits, I may do a tutorial on this in the future.

Gradient mapping is a powerful tool for recoloring almost anything. It can give way better results than methods such as hue/saturation, replace color, etc. And thanks to photoshop actions, applying this recolor to all the animation frames took just a couple of minutes.

Unfortunately, the fall leaves look "bright" in the nighttime version of the playscene. There does not seem to be a way to implement a darker version of these leaves for the nighttime playscene. If you look at the sprites in Tinker, you'll see that there are two sets of animations for Leaves A, B, and C and they're labeled "PropsAd" and "PropsAn", which would lead you to think that the developers originally intended for there to be a set of leaves for the day time, and a darker set for the night time. I guess the developers scrapped this idea because this does not work in the actual gameplay. When I experimented with this, the game appears to randomly display the nighttime sprite even during the day time, effectively ruining the intended affect. I'm not sure why the developers scrapped this. Either they had issues coding this properly or were just didn't want to put in the effort to make two sets of leaves.

WINTER

Instead of doing recolored leaves for this scene, I made all the leaves transparent and added holiday lighting to the tree. I know the lights aren't perfect - it was kind of hard to make out which direction a branch was going, so it has hard to maintain 'perfect' perspective.

CRYSTAL YARD

This is a bonus playscene that I made because I got a little side-tracked as I was working on the 4 seasons back yards. This is inspired by the Suramar zone from World of Warcraft, so it has a bit of that fantasy, night-elf feel and color scheme. It's been years since I've played WoW but I still appreciate the enchanting aesthetic of the elven zones.

I used gradient mapping again to recolor the leaves to give it this lavender, shimmery, iridescent look. I did a little bit of gaussian blurring and layer effects to make them look a little more "glowy" than the originals.

As before, Tinker won't let me edit the blinds, so it limited what edits I could do to the houses. I would love it if I could have done curtains instead or something. I did my best to make these houses look a little less suburban and more elven. It's not perfect but it was rough working with what I had.

KNOWN ISSUES / THINGS I COULDN'T EDIT

As far as I'm aware, there is no way to turn off the snow effect for seasons like summer where it wouldn't make sense. This probably involves some code-editing that is beyond my technical skillset.

The winter playscene still has the green grass footprint when your petz walk. The sprites for these are not housed within the .env itself but in the Petz 5 Rez.dll file. It would probably involve a bit of tweaking in the code to switch the sprites to something else.

The fall leaves are "bright" in the night time version because there is no way to implement a second, darker set of leaves.

I cannot edit the blinds animation. Tinker gives you an error when you try to edit this sprite. This unfortunately limits what edits I can make to the house and the fence because of where the sprite is positioned.

If anyone does know of solutions to these, do let me know as I'd love to enhance these scenes further!

ICONS

Making the icons for these was also a fun little project. For some odd reason though, the game puts a stray pixel over them when I import them through LnzPro. I did my best to disguise them but there does not seem to be a way to fix that.

BEFORE / AFTER

With all that rambling out of the way, visit my main page over at Magnolia Road > Resources > Playscenes to download the goodies!

[deathsbestgirl]

okay here goes: never again & the cancer arc.

a little more in depth? than what i've already posted lol

never again opens with scully sitting in the basement office, contemplating where she fits, where she is in "their" office. she's holding mulder's nameplate and the first thing she says to him, after he ranted about having to take vacation, is "why don't i have a desk?"

he doesn't seem to understand why she's asking, where it's coming from and answers glibly, sarcastically. she's not happy with his answer. so she just...moves on, asking what he wants her to do while he's gone.

in the first scene, we saw scully not paying attention while their informant talked to mulder. she's looking at a memorial, the messages & gifts people left for a lost loved one. she takes a wilting flower petal.

season 4 has been tense. they've dealt with some twisted cases, she was held in contempt, she couldn't protect mulder or give him what he needed or stop him making a huge mistake in paper hearts. skinner was disappointed in her. they also had one of their most ridiculous cases in el mundo gira, an episode i know is commonly disliked. i don't necessarily enjoy it either but there are a few lines that really grabbed my attention.

it's about immigrants, who avoid the government at all costs in fear of deportation or jail (maybe worse). but they're mostly invisible. they're hired for cheap labor, but that's the most they're noticed for. their deaths & lives aren't a concern to this country.

scully is able to find the cause, but the two men infected & spreading the deadly fungus escape. they escape because they're "invisible"

scully wasn't there for mulder's conversation with lozano, but her statement at the end echos what lozano says in a way. when they first arrived, scully waved her badge around completely not understanding how she would be received in a migrant community as a federal agent. she made the same assumptions lozano did. but she follows mulder's lead, and the science, and the truth lands somewhere in the middle, and there isn't a satisfying conclusion to the case. yet again.

they rarely get all the answers. and even when they solve a murder, close a case — what's the cost?

i think scully sometimes feels invisible. her life is standing still. they're hidden away in the basement. she already had to fight for a place in male dominated fields. now she has to fight for the validity of the x files & mulder.

and maybe more than that, mulder doesn't always understand that scully wants to be on the x files, in the basement with him. she was assigned and he doesn't take her dedication & investment as seriously. not because he doesn't know the personal cost to her, or that she chose to stay, but because he has a hard time believing it, accepting it. he tells her several times there's life beyond the x files, to go be a doctor, she'll be head of the bureau. he never expected her to stay, to make it her life too. but she does. she chooses him & the x files over and over. and she wants him to understand, but i don't think she completely understands either.

i said once that it seemed to me scully truly realized how deep she was in with mulder in folie a deux. she was frustrated when mulder acts like he's the only one being "punished" being assigned to a case he thinks is a load of crap, but she was taking seriously. to her, it's always "we" and he acts like it's just him. he goes off without her, ends up needing her help & being right that it was a legitimate case & an x file! and in the end, she tells skinner as much as she can. she sees the zombie people. she sees the being in his room. a madness shared by two.

anyway. i think in never again she wasn't sure exactly what was bothering her, but she knew she was hitting that wall. and that's how she ended up with ed. talking about her patterns. mulder doesn't exactly fit the mold, but scully still wasn't getting what she wanted or needed. and she only calls ed for a date after mulder makes that comment.

mulder knew she would go, even though she refused in their office. he knew exactly where to find her. he was frustrated with her in the beginning, and then he's frustrated with her again for giving up the case when following pudovkin didn't lead to anything x files related, only russian mob. he wasn't trusting her, wasn't believing her.

the last time he asked her about a date was in the jersey devil. which he interrupted and she was happy for it. she didn't take the second date. this time when he asks, she decides to go on a date. exercise some autonomy instead of doing "as told, as always"

scully wants to work on the x files with mulder and have a life. when given the choice, whenever options are presented to her, she chooses mulder every time. but she wants to feel the same in return, especially after she feels like she's failed (him).

at ed's apartment, she doesn't want to go to the nice restaurant he got a reservation for. she wants to go the bar that's a great place to go when you're feeling crappy. because she's so obviously feeling crappy. when have we seen her seek out a date? or any other male attention? (seriously anyway, or without going back to mulder)

even though mulder isn't the typical controlling figure in her life, though he has his moments, like what's happening here...what she says about her father is true of mulder too.

she's hitting that wall, she needs to rebel. but how can she "rebel" against mulder & their work, on a illegitimate x file (lol). she rightfully hands off the case, then goes on a date, gets a tattoo and sleeps with a man who ends up trying to kill her (arguably stumbling into a real x file)

i think scully figured out what she needed to. she doesn't seem affected by this instance of violence like she was by duane barry, her abduction or donnie pfaster. (ed had just tried to kill her and she still tries to stop him sticking his arm in the furnace. she kept appealing to him.)

she knows what she wants at the end. but mulder won't say it, and neither will she. they both know but if they can't say it, they can't be on the same page and they can't really move forward. they stay in the ouroboros, in the endless line. somehow different yet exactly the same.

mulder not finishing his sentence, refusing to repeat her words back to her, was like a nail in the coffin. they know. it is their life. their lives have become (almost) completely intertwined, they made it this way. they are each other's person, they have the same path because of the choices they make over & over.

and then: mulder starts to do something different in leonard betts.

scully has always been there when he needs her, for the work, for samantha, for his mom. mulder is always there when she's emotionally vulnerable (as far as she lets him). she says she's fine over & over, she tells him she's back & she's not going anywhere. and when it comes crashing down around her, when she can't hold the facade & he's there & steady for her, she falls apart in the safety of his arms.

[side note: it's so funny to me how scully still never has any idea what she's walking into. if we don't see a slideshow, she's going in completely blind. he always gives the case to her piece by piece.]

this scene is just. my favorite. mulder can look at horribly disfigured bodies, he'll touch & taste anything at a crime scene. but he's disgusted when he realizes he's touching bile. he can hold it together at dismembered bodies, but would love to draw the line at touching them.

but scully asked for his help, and how often has she done that in regards to her domain on cases? i'm sure there had to be some, but i can only remember her asking mulder to smell a body in revelations.

anyway. this man is genuinely horrified at the idea of digging through a dumpster of left over body parts.

there's nothing he wants to do less, but he does it. because she asks him to. (and it should lead them to some answers.)

later, leonard betts goes after scully. tells her "i'm sorry, but you've got something i need" after they've ascertained is brain was "riddled" with cancer, and he feeds on it, could identify it in anyone, he spent a lot of time in cancer wards, likely scavenging when he could.

scully is shaken after.

and here, mulder doesn't understand what's bothering scully, and he does something we don't seem him do very often, if ever this outright? he explicitly tells her she did a good job, she should be proud.

i think i've said before i don't think scully lets herself feel proud very often. she craves validation, always tries to do the most, is always excited to tell mulder when she has something. here he's giving her something she should love, and she can't appreciate it because she needs to get out of there. she's terrified. another case solved, ending in death. she saved herself again. but now...she's facing the possibility of cancer. and despite being a skeptic, she believes leonard betts.

which!! we saw earlier in the episode too. when she's about to examine leonard betts' decapitated head and his eyes open & his mouth moves, almost as if whispering to her (genuinely reminds me of when she sees her father in beyond the sea) — she can't continue the autopsy. she calls mulder and he picks up on it immediately. and in this moment, she isn't particularly vulnerable. and more typically, that's when we see her believe most, when her defenses are weakened and she needs something to hold onto, or she can't bring herself to use her defenses.

"blinked or winked?" his jokes this episode are so important to me. because never again was so tense, so leonard betts taking place after never again and before memento mori is a good cushion. he's responding to what he understood about scully after never again, and trying to bring back their usual banter. scully is still pretty annoyed with him but they're still together on this case. they disagree, scully playing skeptic as mulder throws his crazy theories at her.

and scully's expressions whenever they're on the phone are so much more expressive. it's special. she lets go of her professionalism and just reacts, and mulder is having a great time. he thinks they're getting back to a better place, and they are, but everything still remains in the silence.

mulder is still making jokes and scully pretends to be unamused (she is hopeless in the best way). and because i love when scully says riddled:

so truly, leonard betts is a connecting episode. there are a few lighthearted moments after the intensity of never again, an episode that was about mulder not understanding where scully was coming from, and leonard betts is about what he was able to understand. giving her validation. it's also makes more sense that he doesn't try to give her any physical comfort after, to me, if leonard betts happens after never again. paper hearts happened not that long ago, and scully was fierce in that episode and physically affectionate with him.

mulder and scully both knew at the end of never again what's between them. mulder leaves "but it's become mine" unsaid, he cuts himself off. scully was frustrated with not truly knowing her place with mulder, on the x files, in their office. his unfinished sentence and the following silence said it all. if it was ever going to happen, it would have been right then. and it doesn't.

leonard betts is a little cushion between two intense episodes. the awareness of their feelings in never again, trying to find their rhythm again in leonard betts & scully's revelation at the end. they lead to the emotional & physical vulnerability in memento mori and through the cancer arc. the feeling of what they're losing before it even started.

[thephloxbayou]

It's really wild having read the books, watched the Tencent adaption, and now watching the netflix adapation.

Im only working through episode 2 right now but thoughts so far:

If you want to get into Three Body Problem, the netflix adaption isnt it. Tencent did a really good adaption if you need the visual media before reading the books or just to have a good idea of what's up in the books (tencent only covers the first). Netflix is, from what I heard and what I'm seeing, taking all 3 (or 2 of the 3) and cramming it, mixing what is supposed to be thousands of years in timeline between different characters and instead placing them all at the same point in time. It's running at breakneck speed, and each concept is barely getting time to sink in. In fact, none: they throw it at you and it happens then we're on to the next thing.

But what I DO like, if I'm viewing this as a little bonus add on rather than an honest recap, which is really what I'm doing (also a teeny but hate watch but mostly what I'm about to say lol), is seeing how the higher budget is used for particular scenes. Dehydration was gnarly as shit and great. Tencent got the concept, but didn't have the budget. (Tencent NAILED the boat scene tho imo, but I haven't seen in here yet either). I also like that we are getting it more established that the game immerses you physically. That wasn't covered in Tencent. Now, Tencent went with what we can ACTUALLY do which included the headsets and the omnidirectional treadmill, which is rad. In the book, you are physically immersed via a headset and a suit. Conceptual, but reasonable enough to reality. Netflix jumps past reality, but does bring in the immersion part. It's just a headset (likely alien tech, I believe), but when you put it on, they have a bunch of good visual cues/actions from the actors to show they can feel/taste/ etc the environment. I felt that was important to show, because then the stakes of figuring out the stable eras become higher: you don't want to feel like you're fucking burning up or freezing to death. (One character... lets say doesn't seem too concerned but it was hilarious lol )

Something that is interesting but I don't feel is objectively a point for or against either show is the acting. It's really cool to see the differences between Eastern and Western methods! This is especially apparent in the scenes based in China as they are the most similar between the book and the shows. I'm an animator so this is also something I'm always processing, consciously or not. At different points I find myself preferring one or the other. Overall, the more subtle acting of Tencent (Eastern), although there were times it felt wooden to me. At a few points, Netflix (Western), but it's lead to some hilarious over-reacting at some points, that I don't think I would have recognized (as an American raised on Western media) if I didn't have the Tencent comparison. Specifically, Ye Wenjie doing hard labor and THROWING herself dramatically to look at the sky for relief, which made me laugh out loud. Or her reading the book under the covers, eyes getting EXTRA wide and biting her lip to show "oh wow I am reading interesting forbidden media!" Less hilarious and more groan inducing is her and the reporter having to have sex in the netflix version as a shortcut to show "oh an now when he betrays her that's showing you just how bad it is!" when I think they had done a good quick job of showing their mutual disdain and desperation and the destruction of the planet and the closeness of having that "outside" view and the secrecy of it brings them from the way they showed that and a simple hand holding scene they did. If they kept with that, dropped the sex, and then when the betrayal happens have him go in on her viciously like he does in the book (and recreated in Tencent), it would have worked fine and taken the exact same amount of time (instead he just stands quietly in a corner during that scene looking ashamed). All in all, I know I prefer more subtle acting per my animation preferences, but regardless it's just a really fun thing to see.

TLDR: Don't watch the show to learn about 3 Body. If you already KNOW 3 body, my recommendation at the moment is watch if you just want to see some scenes done with a better budget, I do find it really fun to see how some of these things (between both Netflix and Tencent and just for books to visual in general) are adapted and if they match up with my mind's visual of the events :)

[wordsbymae]

Soooo, I've been watching a lot of God of War Ragnarök gameplay, and now I've got Vikings on the brain. Especially Thor from the game, the way he's built has me kicking my feet lol. Anyways I think that maybe the reader was a part of a small village that wasn't worth all that much, and they get taken as a prize by the Vikings, maybe for use as labor, etc. One of the raiders decides to present them to their leader because he's got the best pick out of all the loot. So he decides that he's going to take them as his spouse. Of course, as a Viking, you're on the move for a portion of the year, so he goes and stashes his darling in another village, and threatens them into taking care of the darling for him. Because they're doing this out of fear, they're doing the bare minimum, so the reader is working themselves to death trying to do all the household chores, with hardly any help because the villagers resent them. They had hardly gotten a glimpse of their new "husband" before he had to leave, but based on rumors, they hear that he's a terrifying warrior, a hard, ruthless man, and the reader is very afraid because someone who sounds like that doesn't seem like they would be lenient about having an unclean house, or a disobedient partner. Eventually, after several months of him being away at sea, he comes back. And based on appearance alone, he's everything that the reader thought that he would be. But I think it would be kinda endearing if the reader hears off in the distance, their husband calling for hot water for him to bathe because he doesn't want to greet his new partner with the dirt and filth of his profession, and his clean clothes make him look almost tame. I'm imagining it's winter, and when he gets inside he notices that there's no firewood, and when he asks the reader why, they shakily admit that they haven't had the time, between keeping the house clean and cooking for themselves, and the townspeople were always so busy. And the viking is livid at that because not only did he threaten them he paid them money for their silence. He's quietly plotting his revenge, because hard labor is not the life for *his* spouse of all people. He's an older man, journeying like this has taken a toll on him and he just wants to settle down.

Random bulletpoints that I just wanna talk about:

When he comes home to the reader, he's inwardly nervous because he's been practicing saying their name because they come from different lands.

The reader gets a little drunk off of some wine he brought from his travels, and he delights in how giggly it makes them, in contrast to the apprehension from when he first arrived.

He's just big, everywhere. I mentioned Thor earlier, go look at him and tell me that I'm wrong XD.

I also think it'd be funny if he constantly jokes about how old he is.

Thanks for hearing me out! It feels like I wrote a whole novel in here.

Oh my goodness I love this so much! I have only seen snippets of God of War but I totally agree! Also, I love watching gameplay more than actually playing hehe.

Yes! My favourite trope for fiction is 'war prize', it scratches this itch in my brain just right. Especially when the reader isn't anyone special. Their not royal, not nobel, or they don't even have valuable skills, the Viking just saw them once and went, 'i want that pathetic looking one' (affectionately).

Poor reader! having to take care of a massive household by themselves. Quick question! Since the Viking wants to take them as their spouse, was there a ceremony? Or does the reader have no idea they are meant to be married to the Viking, or does the reader know they're meant to be married but technically they aren't yet, which would be the saddest for the reader cause 'legally' they could leave but the rumours they hear of this ruthless and bloodthirsty man (as you said) force the reader to stay and play spouse.

I like that you said the villagers resent the reader, cause they were threatened by this giant, vicious Viking. None of the villagers wants to talk to the reader, or even help them, so the poor reader is so lonely :(

I also love that reader didn't get to really meet or know their new husband! They are so terrified of him returning that they clean stress every day.

I love love love the fact he wants to be clean for the reader. Like you said he wants to be seen as less terrifying (which is hard) for his new spouse. Ohhh! When he asks them for the firewood, reader would be so scared and kicking themselves for not having the time. But he is so polite! and kind! and while he does seem to be really really mad it is directed at the village so the reader can take a moment to calm themselves.

I am such a sucker for the whole bloodthirsty warrior settling down trope with a pretty spouse. Like yes, go be a domestic man!!!!!! It's so good.

AAAAAAAAA! Those dot points???? I love them to death! The one about practising their name is sooooo cute, especially when you remember that they didn't really meet so either the reader only said it once and he's been obsessed with it since then or he had to ask the slaves they captured from the reader's village for their name. either way, I'm obsessed!

Reader all giggly???? and him just sitting there in awe at how lovely they look, red-faced and with a dopey smile. He would love how different they acted around him, now longer walking on eggshells but they are finally acting themselves. He nearly passes out when the reader jokingly sits on his lap and kisses his cheek, and the reader complains about his dagger sheath digging into them.

SZA says it right by saying I need a big boy. He is so big that reader, even though they might have been quite big or tall themselves, still has to crane their head up to try and make eye contact, and when they are kneading dough and he comes up behind them to close them in and they feel so small against him. You already know my mind is rushing towards the gutter but I'll leave those thoughts for now unless you want them then please just ask and you will receive ;)

Hehe yeah, he keeps making all these jokes about being old and it stresses the reader out cause he acts like he's on death's door.

I loved this so much! That is ok! I should be thanking you! This made my day!

Lots of love

mae xx

[bleachbleachbleach]

Hello, I've been hooked up with Bleach since 2008 but still there are things that don't sit well with me. I hope your thought would bring me into the light lol. Like.. Didn't Masaki stay in Soul Society? I mean, is Ichigo able to meet her somewhere in SS since he now could easily travel between two worlds. Same question with, can Orihime meet Sora? Chad meet Abuelo? Uryuu meet his mommy, etc etc. Do you thonk Gotei 13 have the updated data of each residence of Soul Society? When I think it over, I hope it's not that easy for them to meet their late relatives since it wouldn't be special to be seperated by death 😅 Waiting for your amazing explanation! Thanks

As far as how the nature of souls and memory and the slippage between worlds works, I feel like canonically, different characters have offered several different explanations, which is a multiplicity I appreciate. But as to why people aren't meeting up, we get one fairly straightforward explanation:

[Bleach 076]

(Lol that woman doing her hair while standing in line. An icon)

That is, why don't people meet up with their dead loved ones in Soul Society? Because it's statistically hideously unlikely and logistically a nightmare. People are punted off all over the place and there's some implication that memories fade over time, though at what rate and for what reason may not have rhyme nor reason.

But I think that explanation also invites two additional interesting questions:

If each soul is numbered, why can't these numbers be used to locate souls?

Why wouldn't you expect reunions in an afterlife?

Ways of Knowing

You'd think that naming and numbering districts and giving souls numbers would suggest that there's some kind of great ledger of souls that the Gotei keeps and they know where everyone is. We know that the Gotei has enough Rukongai census data to know when fucktons of souls suddenly go missing, after all. But we also know that they don't know what number goes to which soul and which souls are where; if they did Byakuya probably could've reunited his dying wife with her baby sister, even if it were still logistically a nightmare to do so. What are logistics in the face of limitless money?

And I mean, most people living in the United States have a social security number. But even though there's a billion more ways that number comes into play when you're trying to live in the US than your soul ticket number is likely to bear on your Rukongai life--taxes, mandatory K-12, digital footprints, bills, etc.--it's still hard to keep track of people. And I say this living in a very modern, surveillance-state era. At 331 million-ish, does the US have more or fewer people living in it than Rukongai, making it easier or more difficult to keep track of them all? Who knows.

To use an example that's dealing with a smaller number of people--and therefore, one might think, a more manageable dataset--during World War II, the US forcibly removed and incarcerated Japanese Americans at 10 incarceration camps and a number of DOJ prison camps. Every Japanese American family was given a number and sent off to X or Y camp. Despite the fact that this is recent history, was a literal federal operation, and concerned a population of 125,000 (much smaller than 331 million, and much smaller than the number of souls in Rukongai), and multiple call numbers for related documents housed at the National Archives, there is no complete, official record of who was incarcerated where, when, or for how long. Only this year is any of that narrative-through-information beginning to take shape, and notably not through the labor of the federal government.

So do I think Soul Society has complete, updated, or remotely useable records of all the souls in Rukongai? Hell no. No, I do not! Just thinking about how straightforward such a task seems on paper in our world and how utterly apart it is in practice, it doesn't surprise me at all that there aren't records for these things, nor assumptions that locating lost family members would be possible. And that's just the practical aspect of it.

Ways of Being

One thing that separates the historical example I used from whatever it is Soul Society is doing is, if a federal government is going to forcibly remove and incarcerate people, they better not lose (or never create) the damn receipts. To do otherwise is a failing atop a failing.

By contrast, at the thematic and/or spiritual level, I think it's understood--it is an existential belief--that Soul Society/Rukongai is not a place of reunion. It is a place of passage and of wandering, and to arrive in Soul Society is usually not helped along by shinigami. Konsou, the tickets, the numbered districts--those are all accoutrements that now exist, they are things that created Soul Society, but they are not this afterlife. This afterlife was not a place of reunion before it was any of those things, and is remains one even after their creation.

I think it's possible to trigger a kernel panic if your soul was briefly housed by a bird and some very-much-alive guy wandered into the afterlife through a secret trapdoor, and then you get to reunite. But I think it's not necessarily something you come into the situation seeking.

Souls get stuck in the Living World because they snare on this or that element of what was once their life, so I think it makes sense that in Soul Society, those same holds are not part of what it means to be or feel as a soul in Rukongai (particularly as memories fade, but not necessarily because memories fade).

And to return to the practical, I think the churn of souls is unpredictable enough to help the mindset that Rukongai is not a place of reunion. Your soul could be in Rukongai for three days before you die and return to new form in the Living World. You could be there for centuries. If you were to enter Soul Society with the expectation of finding one specific soul, you could spend a frenzied, obsessive lifetime searching for a soul that has already lived seven different cycles, back and forth between the realms, further and further away from you, without you.

And then who's the hungry ghost?

--

For further reading, @unohanadaydreams has some awesome recent posts on the Rukongai Ticket Fiasco here and here!

[quasisuspect]

First of all, I hope that wherever you are in life you're healthy and as happy as you can be. I also must confess that I did reactivate my tumblr account from eight years ago to send this message.

In high school, I used to read your Glee fanfics at night alone in my room when I was so far in the closet that I was eating fucking Turkish delight in Narnia. Those stories breathed life into me and unraveled a beautifully complicated and seemingly unattainable fantasy where two women can be together romantically. Granted Santana and Quinn did have a hard time staying together, but you get my point.

I used to get butterflies in my stomach when I saw that there was a new chapter update, not only because I got to crawl away into a queer world, but because the creation of this world was done so carefully and artfully. The complexity of LIALTHI and IBYM are impressive and exhilarating, it was better than watching a thrilling movie. While much of the thrill was the queer representation--if it can really be called "representation," when it was simply was just the queerNESS--but the writing and storylines were beautifully crafted while both heartwarming and heartbreaking. I felt like I experienced every emotion outlined in the text on screen of my iPhone 3 before I panically cleared my browsing history out of fear someone might discover my sins.

You didn't ask, but don't worry, things got better. I'm out and have worked through plenty of internalized homophobia. Even in a healthy gal pal relationship. Glad I didn't place bets on how my future would pan out when I was that sad sack in high school because I'd have lost a lot of money.

I recently reread LIALTHI and IBYM , they were wonderful again as I expected. And while we've come a long way in access to queer storylines and leading characters and shows, I can't seem to stop thinking about Quinn and Santana's story in this series. I'm left a little hollow thinking about them swimming around in the abyss, unfinished, unrequited, undeserving of being left on the precipice.

Let me be clear, this is NOT me shaming you for not finishing the story. These characters are creations of your brain and they don't "deserve" anything. You did unpaid labor that probably benefited thousands of people, and for that you should not feel bad about dropping off. This was meant to more be a "thank you" for creating this world. And while I'm sad the world now exists in a plane that doesn't intersect with our own, I'm better off for crossing through it for the time that I could. Sometimes I like to think that unfinished stories go off into space and finish themselves (wanky) purely for their own benefit.

Like many, I was devastated about Naya's death. I felt like she played a character I knew in so many other ways, from so many other non-canon stories, and now they were all lost. I thought I would feel queasy reading anything in this world again, but it felt like coming home to friends. To friends who were there for me when I needed them most. And who I'm still invested in after all this time.

Now I know I just (genuinely!!) said I feel no type of frustration or sense of injustice that you didn't finish the story, because you're a person who has a real life that exists outside of fanfiction.net. And I can't emphasize enough how that is far more important. However I would low key pay you to finish lol. Kidding, not really, name your price, jk... :)

Anyway. Thank you for giving so many extra layers to these characters and for serving a community with your creative mind. It was special for me to be able to go back and read one of my favorite stories. Again, I truly hope you are out there living a life you love. Stay well xx

Whew,

This is a such a gift of a message. I wish I could ping you in some way, Anon, to tell you that I've finally responded to this.

Love the Narnia reference. The wanky one later as well.

Writing fanfiction really helped me. I had been "out" for years before I started writing but my imagination when it came to queerness really expanded when I began writing and engaging with the community here.

I want you to know that they got a happy ending. That was the only plan ever for me. They are healthy (working more towards whatever that is bit by bit) and happy together.

Feel free to message me off anon and we can discuss the things I had planned or how happy you are with your gal pal. I am happy for you and I am fucking proud of you.

[puddlecraft]

Seven of Pentacles

TRADITIONAL MEANINGS

Hard work paying off, situation coming to fruition, final stretch, tangible results, frustration with slow results, sustainable results, perseverance, crossroads, taking stock of a situation, patience

MY INTERPRETATION

The 7 of Pentacles shows a gardener leaning on their tool (in my Florana deck it is a spade, in RWS it is a hoe) and taking a break to admire the fruits of their labor. Their hard work tending the garden has paid off – the crops are tall, healthy, and bountiful – but they know their work is not over until harvest time. Still, they are pleased with their results so far and are taking a moment to catch their breath before moving into the final push.

This card shows that your efforts have borne fruit! You can expect results soon, after a little more tending to the garden to make sure those fruits are as ripe and juicy as they can be. Even if your metaphorical plant doesn't seem to be laden with the earth's bounty, consider that a large plant requires a robust root system; your work is paying off in ways you can't see. Trust that your honest labor and perseverance has not gone unacknowledged.

This is a great moment to rest and reflect on what you have accomplished so far, and to make sure you're heading in a direction that you want to go. Is this the kind of plant you were hoping for? If not, what changes can you make to get it where you want? No matter your answers, it takes sustained effort to nurture a garden, so take this time to care for yourself, your body, and your spirit!

The spade (again, a detail unique to my deck) is a tool of change and making moves, which feels quite powerful here as the gardener has taken it in their own two hands to create the change they want to see in the world. Yet, its presence indicates there is more change still to come, so its use has not come to an end just yet. Keep that thing close and dig your way to the life you want!

The gardener's red clothing, standing out among a sea of green and yellow, is a symbol of power, passion, strength, ability, and leadership, which could be read (lol) a couple of ways. To me it presents strongest as "the gardener is in control" and "the gardener is sure of their own power." They planted this garden, coaxed it to life through repeated hard work, AND they have the power to rip the plants out of the soil and start over if they are no longer doing the gardener any good. Only you can make the decision where to go from here, but if you rely on your intuition, you will always choose wisely.

POSSIBLE MEANINGS FOR ME

This was my daily draw today! I've been on the job search grind since June, and I think this is a nudge that all those efforts are about to pay off (pentacles could not be more literal about that). I've had a couple interviews over the last few weeks and have come across some promising job leads, so there are multiple opportunities on my plant, and I need to keep putting in the effort to get them harvest-ready. It feels like the goal post is in sight, so it's time to rest up and make sure I'm in top shape for the final push!

One other detail on this card that jumped out to me just now is that the gardener is a plant themself. Neat to think about all the external work that this card talks about also being applicable internally, and clearly this gardener has been through it before many times, seeing as how they're a healthy, successful plant person. It gives me a hopeful feeling!

[jaywritesrps]

The nanny was right. Ali is never with those kids anymore. Who would’ve though that actual deadbeat mom was her and not ashlyn. She’s really following in kens footsteps here. To think she wanted primary custody. Or was that just to f over ashlyn and not infact about those kids best interests. Makes me wonder if that was the crux of the issue. Ashlyn stopped being Ali crutch with everything including the kids. She got mad at ashlyn travelling for work and it became the final straw for ashlyn and she left.

Ali seems like she having a hard time dealing with it all and ashlyn has even stopped using that nanny full time now and is doing all of it herself

Honestly, I think the NY justice system might know more about that than a Nanny that was fired in a country that has rudimentar labor laws. Ali's house was set as those kids main residence for a reason and St. Ashlyn didn't even complained about it and even agreed later with the alimony, so there's nothing there.

People claims Ashlyn is a bad parent for what she shows in her social media and how she pretty much seens to forget she is a parent when Sophia is around. That doesn't mean she is a bad parent, cause we are not 24/7 in her house to know what it was look like. Same for Ali, what the nanny claims is only news cause she got fired and she knows there's a bunch of lunatics over there that will give her audience (if this was in Brazil, she would be a internet famous right now lol) and it won't change the fact that, even if what the nanny told is truth, St. Ashlyn still agreed with leaving kids with her as main residence, she is just irresponsible as the other one.

[fandomfluffandfuck]

Hi S - I’m sorry to dump on you but I feel like my friends are sick of hearing about this and I have to talk to someone.

I adore the apartment I’m renting right now, but my landlord told me a few weeks ago that she’s selling it. She’s been really nice and kept me at the same rent while everyone else’s exploded, which means my money means much less than it did three years ago, so everything I’m seeing so far is a huge step down. Which is hard, because this is the first place I’ve lived and felt truly safe in in my life.

I just saw an apartment that’s much smaller, and doesn’t have a dishwasher, but it’s clean and in an incredible location and only $100 more in rent. But I have some (maybe fruitless) concerns about the maintenance set up, and the move in date is a month earlier than I’d been preparing myself for. So I’ve been wrapped in a panic attack for hours second guessing myself. Because I don’t want to let this go and regret it, but I’m also still processing losing my perfect apartment.

This is when I need a dom, not sexually atm but, like, for life advice (only partly joking). Because my gut feeling changes every few hours and I’m not trusting myself and I just want this uncertainty to end.

Hey, sweetheart.

It's chill, lol. I can't promise you good advice but, hey, I'll definitely listen.

That's really tough! Losing a place to live, in general, always sucks when you like it there, but it especially sucks in the current economy when the price of living is stupid high. You have to spend so much for so little. Plus, yeah, it sounds like you really, really enjoy where you're living right now and are deeply connected to it. You've had a good time there, and you're very familiar with it, so I get that it's hard to let it go. I don't think anyone would want to let that go.

If you like the other apartment you've been looking at, then you like it. The location sounds like a highlight for you. So, it might be worth it just for that. Yet, I get the maintenance concerns. You'll have to consider if any maintenance issues that might come up will be worth the $100 less of rent each month. "Worth it" in terms of actual money or in emotional labor and stress if things are breaking or degrading continually. It might be possible to find somewhere else that is $100 more, but you have fewer concerns with it, so it could balance out. Peace of mind can be priceless (especially if you have anxiety and tend toward being high-strung). It might not be possible, though. I don't know your whole situation. I, as dorky as it sounds, often need to write down the positives and negatives when it comes to large decisions like what you're describing. You might try that. The pros and cons can all be logical or all emotional or a mix, if you try it, it doesn't matter. It's just good to spill your thoughts.

Second-guessing yourself is hard, too. So is making decisions when you're pressed. I understand not wanting to regret passing up this opportunity at the same time that you don't want to rush into something.

Personally, I think I would hold off because of the mentioned concerns with maintainace--I know what a pain in the ass that can be--and the quick turnaround that suggests you have more time to look around for other listings that have the possibility of being better. However, you know your situation best. Maybe that other apartment is the best thing. It sounds like it could be if cleanliness is on your positive, unexpected benefit list. If so, go for it. But let yourself process that it sucks to lose your current apartment as you go through it. You do not need to suck it up and just be happy that you have found a new place. You can process that this situation sucks, then, slowly, learn things to appreciate about the new place.

Overall, it makes sense that you're upset. This apartment you have now has made you feel safe. You might feel like it seems silly to other people, but this is something worth grieving over losing. It's been your home. Three years is a long time. You're being made to leave before you're ready. That's rough. Even though you might logically know that you will be okay and you will make new memories and find safety and forage your own space in a new apartment, that doesn't stop it from being scary. You'll be okay, though. Whatever decision you make. Regrets are scary but not an end all, be all.

P.S. You say you feel as though your friends are tired of hearing about it, but you're going through it. I'm sure they're not as tired as you think they are. There's updates and changes, and clearly, it's affecting you, so they should be there to help you through it. That's what friends are for.

Take care of yourself <3

[suratan-zir]

I made up my mind and went back to pick him up yesterday. I can't show you his pictures because I am not sure he will make it, I don't want you to be upset if he doesn't.

As I mentioned, he didn't leave his hiding place, so previously I had only seen his little face. So when the store employee lifted his house and was able to see his entire body, my mind instantly went "oh shit".

It took one brief glance at him to realize that his lungs are fucked. He has severe pneumonia, sucking in his sides and gasping for air.

"Does he makes sounds when he breathes?" - I asked

"Sometimes, yes… But he was like this when we got him, it's probably something congenital" - empoyee answered

"All rats carry mycoplasma bacteria, and when their immune system weakens, they develop respiratory infections because of it," - I went on my stupid useless lecture.

She said that they give him the best food! Which unfortunately doesn't matter. No wonder he's refusing to eat, have you ever tried eating while it's hard for you to breathe? He's suffocating. In defence of this store, his cage was really clean, and for a cage this small to be clean you'd have to deep clean it every day. The employee seemed really caring and kind, she clearly loves animals. But she can't know the requirements and potential health problems of every type of pet.

So she lifted his house and tried to grab him, and I saw that not only is he really sick, but he's also very afraid of hands. I watched her struggle for quite a bit, before asking her to step away and then grabbed him myself.

Sidenote: if you're dealing with a rat or other small prey animal who's not used to you, don't try to grab them from above, that's how a predator would catch them, so it's really stressful. Try scoopind them under the belly instead.

I think he's so afraid of hands because every time she cleaned his cage she would scare him, and the stress makes his labored breathing even worse.

He's been with me for less than a day, but he's already much less fearful, I can even pick him up easily (although I try not to do that too often yet) and he really enjoys cheek scratches.

I don't know if the antibiotics will help him, even if he gets better, his lungs are still permanently damaged. Without treatment, he would have one, maybe two months to live, and even that's only because he's so young (about 4 months old). We will see…

And even is he recovers, he will then have to face the final boss - Skritch. This is really scary. Skritch only got a whiff of a new rat in the house and he's already enraged. I paid with my finger for cleaning their cage yesterday. What's so dangerous about Skritch is that he goes for a bite without any warning, and goes full force. I love him with all my heart, but he's a rat with the worst temperament I have ever had. Truly a menace.

I still don't know what to name the little one. For now, I call him Saveliy, but I don't think I'll keep it, because I hate that it's considered a russian name. And it doesn't suit him very well. I'm open to name suggestions, особливо українською. Sorry for such a long text.

EDIT: I think I decided to name him Ravlyk (Равлик)? Which is Ukrainian for snail. If you think it's a stupid name feel free to tell me that, lol, I'm terrible with names.

EDIT 2: he's nameless again :( My partner doesn't like Ravlyk.

EDIT 3: the name was found!

I am currently down to 3 rats - Skritch, Baton and Cactus. With Cactus being on palliative care for a brain tumor. Initial plan was to wait until we have only Skritch left (he is the youngest) and switch to female rats, since Skritch is neutered that would be very easy to do. And I miss having girl rats with their crazy energy.

However…There is one lonely siamese boy in our small local pet store. He's been there for months, all alone, and there is very little chance of anyone buying him because he doesn't even come out of his house, and his tiny cage is pushed all the way back behind the counter, under a bunch of other stuff, so costumers can't even see him. The saleswoman says he's depressed and even rejecting food.

I have a big spare cage and all the necessities. So even if he never gets along with my other boys, he would have a place to live. On the other hand, I can't save every rat I feel sorry for. I don't even like siamese coloring, yet I end up having siamese rats in every of my rat groups (Cactus is siamese too), lol. But taking care of two separate cages is daunting. And it takes up a lot of space. And I don't think Skritch is gonna like a newcomer in the house. I have a strong feeling that introduction is gonna be difficult. Why am I creating problems for myself out of nothing?

[lisacatara-actress]

Almost Lisa: Pt 16, “The curse of ALMOST”

( *I retain all rights to my photography and story, story details, biographical information, fashion designs, art work, and anything and everything I have posted which is my own creation*)

________

“If you build it, they will come”

It's raining today here in Georgia. Per usual, I'm sitting at one of my favorite cafes writing this, to get out of my beautiful prison (aka the home I purchased here). I sit and listen to the voices around me, chatting and collaborating. I pay attention to what locals discuss, their views, their way of communication. It's definitely a place where many come to settle, slow down, and raise a family.

I want none of those things.

“The simple life” has never been for me. I want to grow, expand consciousness, see the world, talk to (lol, almost) everyone. I've come to realize that I may be the most “artsy fartsy” cultural thing here on the south side of the city. My skills, experiences, and interests are different than most people I meet (in general, not only here). I also enjoy being childless and the freedom to live my Gypsy life. Locals often remind me that I’m different. I know better than to bore them with Hollywood stuff. I get it. This is their world. And I am passing through.

As expected, my favorite cafes have become super busy and popular in the past year. Rents have increased all around (almost as much as CA was when I left), there's high-cost residential development everywhere (funny how that never stops), and plans for future studios to be built in surrounding areas. On paper, Georgia film production looks to have massive promise. Y’allywood (as the locals call it) has moved to the South, to stay.

So where’s all the Work?? 

BEHOLD! The top 8 studio heads and their current annual salaries . Entertainment journeymen are being devalued and greatly taken advantage of by the studios. Studios will spend 10′s of millions on CEO salaries, 100′s of millions on non-profitable streamers, and BILLIONS on debt-laden investments/ purchases, but claim there's no extra money to give raises to the writers who create all their content.  Last year, eight major studios CEOs made over $773,000,000. Meanwhile, many of the workers who write their shows can't afford their own rents or match their rising costs of living. It’s why the WGA (Writers Guild of America) is on strike. It is the same reason Sag-Aftra (the Talent union) and IATSE (the craftsmen/ laborers union) is preparing to do the same, and why other industry unions stand in solidarity.  What does this mean for journeymen like me? We have to ride out yet another storm. The last one- in 2007- lasted just over 3 months. While that doesn't seem like a significant amount of time to resolve concerns, in that time the entire industry shifted. Completely.

In the 16 years since the entertainment industry’s last strike, massive technological change has upended the television and movie business. Back then, Broadcast networks commanded substantial audiences, and cable channels were growing. The profitable superhero boom had begun for movie studios, and DVDs generated around $16 billion in annual sales. Now, television as we’ve known it is dying, movie studios are seeing poor ticket sales for dramas and comedies, and the DVD business is all but done with. Content today is streamed. It lives in a “cloud”. However, the formula studios use to pay Creators hasn’t changed. Streaming asks different (higher) demands in several ways and now pays fixed fees in lieu of the residuals which most of us thrive on.

Perhaps the most impactful change that no one seems to be talking about (and I'm repeating myself here in this blog) is that hedge fund and private equity moves the needle of Hollywood, and these companies are under pressure from Wall Street to cut costs. They have been and continue to do so on the backs of everyone creating their product. Established career journeymen like me are working twice as hard for about half what we used to earn. Now, we face extended unemployment, fighting alongside our fellow Unions for fair wages and working conditions. If that isn't enough to fight for, there is also the painful reality (that many Hollywood investors are especially excited for): the implementation of AI Technology to create “content”. That means potential for even more losses of jobs and revenue for us Creatives. And, in our opinions, loss of artistic integrity. Believe us, YOU WILL NOTICE.

At the end of 2019 I was making the most I’d made yet in my 20+ years as an Entertainment professional. I’d saved over the years to afford opportunities to invest in myself and my business, and take the occasional international trip to learn more about the world. 2020 and 2022 were absolute nightmares due to the Covid Pandemic and further changes in the Business of my industry. My savings are almost gone. I did everything right. And I’m struggling. I did everything right. And I’m losing. We all are.

Daily picket lines began Day One last week in front of studios in LA, NYC and wherever they can organize. I gotta give credit to the writers for having the most creative (and effective) picket signs, and I respect IATSE and SAG-AFTRA  members refusing to cross those picket lines, in Solidarity. We are all in the same fight for the same reasons. If only the public realized how much “say” they have in assisting our efforts, simply by how, where, and if  they spend their dollars. But us gosh darn “liberal, entitled Hollywood types...”

NO ONE WANTS A REBOOT.

We’re only on week two of this strike. The AMPTP (the producers) aren't budging yet. From their actions/ inaction, it seems they never had any intention of negotiating to begin with. In an attempt to “hit them where it hurts” (the wallet), Union workers are aiming to shut down as much production as possible. We apologize in advance for the return of reality TV and unscripted “content”. And we all could use your support to change things so that everyone can get back to work, making Magic!!!

Now, if you'll excuse me (*sigh), I have to sell some photography.

(If you care to support, find inspiration @ Catara_Photo_Art on Instagram)

       (To be continued...)

*PS If you like what you're reading, I welcome contributions to the efforts via Venmo @LTarantinoDesigns)

[candlecoo]

One good man au: what if bakugou looked up to izuku for a good while, like an older brother figure, and then when he was kidnapped and sees Izuku there he feels a sense of betrayal and calls him a villain.

Izukus just like 'bro I just work here, it pays well and the people treat me like a person, yknow?' And bakugou feels a sense of. Guilt. Bc he wasn't very nice to izuku growing up, but izuku didn't seem to care at the time.

When all might arrives, bakugou is already gone but izuku is still working, cleaning the bar. All Might maybe recognises Izuku from a few pictures bakugou has, of a small bakugou and a younger izuku. And he's like 'you... betrayed him?' And izukus like 'not really, I just work here man. It's like, the only place that doesn't treat me like a parasite bc of my quirk status lol'

What if izuku is offered a job at UA after the raid on the bar, maybe the bars closed down and he's like 'dammit I gotta find ANOTHER job :/' but nezu slides in like heeeyyy you have info abt the villains maybe and now you have no job! UA has a position open, wanna be my secretary the pay is Great and you get to rat out the villains? Qnd izuku is hesitant bc it's a hero school and people just are not super great to quirkless people but nezu assures him that any mistreatment will be punished accordingly.

I love the energy of izuku in this au, 'bro I just work here I don't do crimes'

At first Bakugou feels betrayed like this person that he has known since he was born, who in all but blood is family to him works for the villains!

After being called out by Katsuki Izuku has a long conversation with the boy.

Izuku: "Contrary to what you may believe Kacchan, I'm no villain I'm just a bartender. And before you say that I should 'work' somewhere else, I'll tell you I've tried. But nobody wants somebody who's quirkless and if they do it's so they can cut my pay, make me do all the hard labor and treat me like an animal. Here I'm treated like a person, like I matter. That's all I ever wanted."

Bakugou: "You could've gone to someone, told them all this shit, I would've listened, a hero would've!!"

Izuku: "... Heroes won't do anything, last time I trusted a hero they destroyed my dreams and told me to learn my place in the dirt with the other worms. They never would've helped someone like me. And as for you Kacchan last I remember you were going around saying how much of a worthless, useless Deku I was. I may be older than you, but I still here the gossip."

And the funny thing is Bakugou knows he is right, Katsuki has never been nice to Midoriya even when all the older boy wanted to do was help him. And it weighs heavy on him.

All Might also accuses Izuku of betrayal and of being a villain, but Izuku looks him dead in the eye and goes "I'm just the bartender, I've never committed a crime in my life." And All Might just blanks like what??? He turns to the young man and is like "then why didn't you report the kidnapping??" To which Izuku throws back "And lose the only job that will hire, let alone treat a quirkless individual like a person? No thanks. The perfect symbol of a corrupt quirk society would never understand that struggle. We quirkless are treated like victims waiting to happen if we haven't killed ourselves before fifteen, that is."

And that throws the Hero for the loop, since gaining OFA he never thought about the struggles of quirkless people, he didn't know it had gotten that bad.

Nezu finds out about Izuku, and after some research finds out that he was wrongly rejected from UA even though his tests would've gained him a seat in Gen Ed at least!!! So with some negotiation gets Izuku a position on the UA staff as his secretary. As long as Izuku helps where he can during investigations. And he promises the man that he will be paid correctly and treated fairly this time around, or there will be hell to pay for any offenders.

Izuku has major "we live in a society" vibes and I love it.