#now i have to respond to the like 40 comments i didnt get to on ao3

[paper-mario-wiki]

Hi, sorry if this is a weird question, but do you ever feel lonely in tf2? I've been playing for a few months now and while it's mostly been fun I always get this dreadful feeling when the match ends and everybody leaves. I also haven't made any friends which makes me sad. Have you made friends and if yes, how?

that feeling of loneliness has existed in the heart of every TF2 player since the Meat Your Match update.

it is difficult to meet people in casual unless you're an active participant in chat, or somebody else goes out of their way to interact with you specifically.

i find it really enjoyable to type in chat (even with the chance that 40% of the time i do it's spammed by bigoted jerks), and at the beginning of most of my games i start by sending "hi everyone! im googoo. lets all have fun together ok?" and more often than i get called annoying or cringe, im met with people saying "hi googoo!" and "gl hf!" (good luck have fun), which feels nice.

be ready to up and leave games if things become TOO heinous (what constitutes "too heinous" is up to your own discretion), but also dont be afraid to stick it out and talk with some of the other weirdos who play this 17 year old game.

sometimes, talking with people who are dickheads can be fruitful too.

one time, i was playing in casual and i met a stereotypical edgelord toxic tf2 player. they were typing shitty things in chat and had a bigoted name on one of their weapons. i called them out, and said "that's a weird way to act, most people will find it odd". as a result, they were teasing me and calling me names during the game, but i still played along side them. after a while, when they noticed that i was still being a helpful teammate to them and letting them take health packs/extinguishing them/protecting them, they were like "why are you helping me after i was a dick to you" in voice, but i ignored them. from then on they werent verbally abusive anymore.

the game continued, and they were speaking more in voice chat, specifically to me mostly, but i never responded. and after a while they said disappointedly "did googoo mute me?" and i said "no i didnt mute you." and he said "why do you still help me? even after ive been an asshole" and i said something along the lines of "i want to be a team player, and you are a part of my team. i dont want to be vindictive, because i dont think that's right. it wouldnt be helpful. i just wish you were a kinder person" and they said "oh. ok" in a really sad way.

after the game they left this comment on my steam profile.

and a few weeks later, they deleted it without another word.

the point of this story is that even as unapproachable as people seem, and as unapproachable as they will make themselves, every person playing has some degree of rationality and understanding, and they want to be a part of the normal social world too. some of them just dont really know how to.

[chaifootsteps]

There is an "artist" in the hyspanic side of the art internet community that reminds me so much of Vivziepop:

Her name is "Angel de la verdad" (Angel of truh in spanish, wich is a very ironic name lol), and she is know for being a grown ass woman (she is almost 40) that acts childish and cant take criticism.

People started making fun of her because she would react badly to any kind of criticism; she would make big tantrums every time someone made a video criticising her work and would send her fans (all of them being literal children because she made videos about sonic, undertale and other things that were popular between them) to harrass and attack them, then negate that she did that. She would also claim that those who have any little negative opinion on her art were haters and would call them childish insults like "rats" and encourage her fans to do the same.

One day she got mad beef with a literal 14yo boy cuz he made a video saying that her Sonic fancomics were cringe, and that made her so mad, that she took down that video, made several video directs making fun of that child, made a drawing where she potrayed him as a crying child while she was scolding him, told lies about how he was harassing and stalking her when she was the one doing that, and even threaten to doxx him because she got his personal information.

She became a very hated figure, in every video she uploaded you would see she had like 40k views but only like 10 comments cause she would erase any "hate" comment calling her out, only keeping the ones made by her bootlickes that couldnt be over the age of 8.

I remember she even did a video "debunking" her acusations, and in the part of the doxxing she said "i never said i would leak personal information of that child! I just told him to behave, and to not give his information to strangers!" Thing that is obviously a lie. She also showed screenshot of personal conversations she had with him "proving" that he was harrassing her, but they were basically her insulting him and he responding with "lol ok".

The latest thing i knew about her is that she posted on twitter that she would sue some youtuber who made a video on her revealing all the things she did, she claimed that the video was "defaming" her and that she already got a lawer. That was about a year ago and nothing happened, so i guess it was all a lie lol.

Viziepop reminds me a bit of her, in the sense that she is also over the age of 30 and still cant take criticism in a mature way. Maybe she doesnt openly insult her "haters", but she inderectly encourages her fans to be horrible people to those who dont like her work.

I was thinking, if Vivzie didnt have a reputation to take care of, she would be similar to the lady i talked about, maybe not to the point of doxxing a child, but in the sense that she would post on her social media the links of videos where she gets criticised and telling her fans to attack them, then acting all inocent with "those mean haters were attacking me 🥺 i was just defending myself..."

But she cant do that, right now she is know as "the saviour of indie animation", as a goddess of pure positivity that inspires others and will get her work shown on TV, that behaviour would ruin her reputation in a second.

So now i can imagine her sitting in front of the computer, looking for people who criticise her work. She would get the idea of making a post so her fans attack them, but then she glances at the poster on her wall, wich says "reminder: you have a reputation on the internet, DONT fuck it up". So she just growls angrily, and limits herself to like comments of her bootlickers defending her.

(Also, little fun fact about Angel de la verdad: she has a sister who is EXACTLY like her, a mediocre internet artists who acts childish and throws tantrums in the sight of criticism. Many people used to belive they were the same person with different users, but they have different voices and pictures together so we know they arent, the world is a crazy place).

Thank you for this story, Anon, and also for this peek into Vivzie's Christmas future.

(Hopefully.)

[blueguydraws]

Russia, Israel and sharks

During history classes i think we all were thinking just how could have people been so cruel and dumb back in the day, salting the land, burning towns on the enemies land, targetting people based on the association of ethnicity. And everyone in the classroom was relieved how lucky it is that we are not that backwards anymore in the civilised world and age. We were also shocked how could everyone have gone mad and how the world turned upisde down during the 40 all over europe and asia. It must have been the genious manipulation of propaganda.

But no, we have to admit sadly that they didnt had to do much if anything, most people simply are just like that, they barely need a push to sucumb to that way of thinking, it doesnt take years of propaganda, but about 5 minutes of news.

A few months ago a man in egypt was eaten by a shark, the video is quiet disturbing, but then it came out that he was russian, living in egypt for about 4 years. And twitter immediately become full with such tweets:

And hundreds of extremely distastefull and sadistic comments celebrating this. If someone questioned them, they just wrote how many ukrainian died in the war if they even responded something coherent. When questioned what did he had to do with any of that, the best they could say is that well russians are evil annyway and he propably supported putin too. Its good that there is one less of them.

War footages were also all over social media, i saw a few where they put loony toons sound effects over deaths, of course bright text made it clear that those were russian soldiers (othervise no one could even tell) and you can have the luxury of laughing at it guilt free instead of virtously clutching your pearls. The ones where someone got bombed while taking a piss or sleeping got particularly many likes and retweets.

Acthual unga bunga bronze age mindset.

Collective punishment and gladiator games, things we tought we abandoned centuries ago, but it didnt even took anything for peole to immediately re embrace it with open arms.

At this point we have to admit that the reason for this is that its just simply part of human nature (not that) deep down. Wich makes sense after all. Humans have been existing for about 300 000 years, but we had our current socially acceptable moral system for about a hundred. Playing civilisation for a few centuries arent gonna be enough to weed out the instinctual cavemen out of us. Wich reminded me to this song by MARINA, "savages", it hit the nail on the head perfectly:

And while maybe war footage is not being shared here, this kind of behavior is definitely not absent from tumblr either.

By the way, talking about ukrain and russia, what do you even know about them? What is the diference between the two? The average internet activist couldnt have been able to point it out on a map before the war. Arent all the news regarding ukrain were talking about how the far right is on the rise in there? But suddenly it become my little UwU ukrain once the war started. My point is that for the avegare person around the world the only diference between the two nation is that one happened to attack the other not the other way around. If history would have went a bit diferently, now you all were laughing at the death of those same poor ukrainian soldiers.

I saw once a tweet made by a guy who just found out that many ukrainians, especially in the army, are deeply religious, and the country is very conservative, and said that he isnt sure he can fully support them anymore lmao.

It was also very cringe how everyone who didnt even heard about Zelensky before started to simp for a random middle eastern politican and made heroic edits about him for the sole virtue of getting attacked, its embarrassing at best.

Did you knew that he was in the panama papers by the way?

And now again with the conflict between israel, palestine and hamas. People just cant behave civilised.

I dont know what is so hard about simply having multiple opinions at the same time, you can easily agree that Palestine should be freed from Israel's influence while also condemning HAMAS.

Many people have been taking off their masks and it often comes from the most suprising groups.

I couldnt have belived that the time comes when people here will support a far right religious fundamentalist terror group.

"but yoU CAnT TelL tHE oprEsSed How REbeLL" I heard many times by now

Yes i can, for example rape, mowing down civilians and parading their bodies like trophies are simply just not part of any military operation and you shouldnt do it, idk why it is a controverial opinion currently.

Also do you think all the extremist groups in the middle east wouldnt want to kill all the jews annyway even if Israel would have been nice? Or you for that matter since i assume the average person reading this isnt a beliver.

The average liberal person with "they/them, ACAB, UwU" in their bio the second there is an armed conflict:

[bibbawrites]

Surprise! - Dad!Owen x Pregnant!Female Reader

Request: NONE

Word Count: 2133 words

Summary: Part 2 of the Dad!Owen series, you reveal to your friends and family that you’re having a baby

Warnings: swearing

A/N: okay here we go, telling your friends and family that you’re pregnant!  as i said in a post the other day, i didnt realise that on survey monkey you could only see 40 results for free so the baby name survey had to end, but if you didnt get a chance to vote and would like to please let me know and i can set up an alternate way to vote :) without further ado, i hope you enjoy! 

Charlie:

The first person who ended up finding out about your pregnancy was Charlie. You had meant to tell your families first, before anyone else, but things didn’t work out as planned.

It was three days after you had found out, and you and Owen were still buzzing. Charlie had been eyeing the two of you suspiciously the last few days, but didn’t call you out on your oddly happy behaviour until that night.

The boys had come home from set, only filming for a couple of hours to re-shoot a scene that needed changing slightly, and you decided to surprise them with pizza from all three of your favourite pizza place. Owen always texted you when they left set, so you knew exactly when to order the pizza to have it arrive just as the boys did.

And your timing was perfect, the pizza arriving almost in unison with your boyfriend and his best friend.

“Y/N, we’re home! You ordered pizza?” Owen called, and you left your bedroom to head to the kitchen, smiling at the boys.

“Figured you could use a treat after filming. Plus I didn’t feel like cooking, so...” You grinned, wrapping your arms around Owen, who lent down to kiss you gently, his hand resting on your stomach for a brief moment before he pulled away, not wanting Charlie to get any more suspicious.

You and Owen headed over to the table where Charlie had placed the pizza and sat down, waiting for Charlie, who had gone to grab drinks.

“Do you want your wine Y/N?” Charlie questioned, placing a beer on the table for himself and one for Owen. You shook your head.

“No thanks, I’m good.” You replied.

“But you love wine with your pizza.” Charlie frowned.

“Not tonight, thanks.” You said, hoping that he would give up.

“Are you feeling okay?” He asked. You nodded.

“Yeah I am.” You told him, picking up a slice of pizza and exchanging a look with Owen, silently begging him to step in.

“She’s got this... thing.” Owen chimed in lamely. Charlie frowned again, before a realisation hit him.

“Holy fuck, you’re pregnant.” He exclaimed. Your eyes widened. Owen choked on his beer.

“What? Why would you think that?” Your voice was slightly shaky.

“You always have wine with pizza, no matter what. And that would explain why you two have been so nauseatingly happy the last couple of days.” Charlie reasoned. You glanced at Owen.

“You can’t tell anyone.” You said after a moment. Charlie’s smile widened.

“So you are pregnant?” He asked, and you nodded. He cheered.

“I’m gonna be an uncle!” You giggled at his excited reaction, watching as he hugged Owen happily, and then rushed around the table to throw his arms around you.

He pulled away, placing a hand on your stomach hesitantly. You gave him a reassuring smile.

“I can’t believe there’s a baby in there.” He said softly, kneeling down next to your chair. Owen copied, kneeling down on the other side.

“Right?” Owen’s voice was just as quiet. “My little girl.”

“We don’t know if it’s a girl Owen.” You reminded him. He shook his head.

“I just know it. There’s no way she’s not a girl.” He replied, and you rolled your eyes slightly.

“Can we go back to eating the pizza now?” You said, and the boys agreed, standing up and sitting back in their chairs.

And with that, the first person knew.

Savannah:

The second person to find out was Savannah. You had been pretty sick, dealing with morning sickness, so Savannah decided what you needed was a little bit of retail therapy. 

Which is how you found yourself trailing behind your best friend as she dragged you from store to store. And everything had been going perfectly fine, until you passed a smoked meat store, and the smell set off your nausea. 

“Sav, I think I’m gonna be sick.” You warned, and she reacted quickly, rushing you into the nearby bathrooms and holding your hair back as you emptied the contents of your stomach into the toilet. 

Once you were done you leant back against the wall of the stall, not even caring that you were sat on the floor of a public toilet. Savannah offered you her water bottle and you took it gratefully, swishing the water around your mouth before spitting it into the bowl and flushing the toilet. 

“Are you okay? You’ve been pretty sick and I’m kinda getting worried about you.” Savannah questioned. You paused for a moment, before deciding how to respond. Hopefully Owen wouldn’t mind another person knowing your secret. 

“I’m pregnant.” You admitted quietly, not wanting anyone in another stall to overhear. Savannah gasped, throwing her arms around your neck. You hugged her back gently. 

“This is amazing Y/N.” She exclaimed. “I can’t believe I’m gonna be an aunty!” 

“You can’t tell anyone yet, other than Owen only Charlie knows.” You told her as she let you go. She nodded quickly. 

“Your secret’s safe with me.” She promised. You grinned, letting her pull you off the floor. 

“Now, can we go look at baby clothes?” Savannah questioned once you were both on your feet. You smiled happily. 

“Of course we can.” You agreed, linking your arm through hers as you headed out of the toilets, so excited that you had another person who you could talk about baby things with. 

Owen’s Mum/Family:

Next was Owen’s mum, who had come to visit for a few days. You had thought of a brilliant way to tell her, after hearing how much she enjoyed building with nano blocks. 

You had gone out before Owen had arrived home from the airport with his mum, and you had picked out the perfect present, wrapping it nicely. 

Finally the time came to give her the parcel, as she sat across from you and Owen in the living room later that night. 

Owen handed her the box, the card you had written on to clarify the situation grasped firmly in his hand as he waited anxiously, his foot tapping.

His mother ripped off the wrapping paper, finding a box of large lego blocks, the kind designed for babies and small children. She looked up, confused, and Owen held out the card.

“Read it out loud.” You prompted.

She took the card, opening the envelope and pulling it out, before opening it up.

“I can’t wait to build with you. Lots of love, your future granddaughter or grandson.” She read out. She gasped, looking between the two of you.

“Are you having a baby?” She questioned. You and Owen nodded. Her hand covered her mouth as she began to cry.

“I'm gonna be an Oma?” She asked, as Owen got up from his spot next to you to go hug his mother.

“You can be whatever you want to be called.” He replied. His mother smiled tearily, holding an arm out for you to join the hug. You grinned, sitting down on her other side and letting her pull you into the hug.

“Can I tell the rest of the family?” She asked, still in the hug.

“Maybe don’t tell everyone yet, cause we’re only 10 weeks, but you can tell Dad and Luka, and everyone else I guess. Just no extended family.” Owen replied.

“Okay I can do that. Congratulations, both of you.” She said, and you both thanked her in quiet voices. 

She stood up, grabbing the box of lego and the card. 

“I’m off to bed if I can manage to sleep. Tomorrow we’re going nursery furniture shopping.” She told you, and before either of you could protest she was gone. 

“Well that went well.” You giggled and Owen nodded in agreement. 

“Three down, only a few more to go.” He said. You made a noise in agreement, snuggling into his side to watch a movie, and you fell asleep with his hands resting gently on your stomach.

Your Family:

Next to learn about the baby was your family. To tell them you had sent them a parcel, with the instructions to call you on facetime before opening it.

You, Owen and Charlie were curled up on the couch, Owen’s head resting just below your stomach and Charlie’s head in your lap, when your phone rang, signifying you had an incoming facetime.

Owen sat up and picked up your phone, handing it to you before curling into your side, and you smiled when you saw it was your mum calling.

“I assume they got the box then.” You spoke before answering, your mum, dad and big brother appearing on the screen.

“Hi guys!” You greeted. “Got the parcel?”

“We did, can we open it now?” Your mum questioned. Charlie glanced at you.

“Want me to leave?” He asked quietly, and both you and Owen shook your heads.

“You can stay.” Owen said softly. You turned your attention back to your family.

“Okay, open it.” You instructed, and your dad ripped the box open, pulling out four smaller boxes, one for each of them and a fourth, which was one of the positive pregnancy tests.

“One at a time?” Your mum suggested and you shook your head.

“Same time, or it will ruin the surprise.”

You watched as they ripped into the boxes, each pulling out a t-shirt.

“Promoted to Nanna?” Your mum read out, a confused look on her face.

“Mine says promoted to Poppy.” Your dad said. You grinned, waiting for the penny to drop.

“Oh shit, you’re not.” Your brother realised, and you laughed.

“Open the last box.”

“How have they not gotten it?” Charlie questioned under his breath, and Owen giggled at the comment.

Your mum pulled the pregnancy test out and gasped, finally realising.

“You’re having a baby!” She exclaimed.

“Surprise!” You laughed.

“When?” Your dad asked.

“Not for a while now, I’m only 11 weeks.”

“Congratulations!” Your mum smiled happily. 

You returned her smile and after a few more minutes explaining, you said your goodbyes and hung up. 

“Now it’s only the cast.” You said, and Owen nodded, repositioning himself so that his head rested next to Charlie’s in your lap. Charlie unpaused the movie you had been watching and you rested your head on the couch. 

This whole thing was getting very real. 

The Cast - Jeremy, Madi, Carolynn, Jadah and Kenny

Finally the time came to tell the cast.

“So, what do you guys think about having a baby around on set?” You questioned casually. Carolynn gasped and Jeremy shot her a concerned look.

“Babies are pretty loud.” Madi replied.

“Yeah, they probably wouldn’t be good to have when you have to be quiet on set.” Jadah agreed. You bit your lip to stop yourself from laughing. You met Carolynn’s eyes and she gave you an excited look. You nodded slightly and she squealed, ignoring the weird looks she was getting from Jeremy.

“Why are we talking about babies?” Kenny questioned, sitting back down.

“Y/N asked about babies being on set.” Jadah told him.

“As in working babies or?” Kenny asked and you shook your head.

“Just babies in general.” Owen chimed in.

“Wait...” Madi spoke up, realisation slowly appearing on her face. “Are you pregnant?”

You grinned sheepishly, taking a sip of your drink. The table erupted in noise, everyone excitedly talking over each other, asking all sorts of questions.

“Oh my god shut up.” Charlie yelled over the noise, and the table went quiet. “One at a time.”

“How far along are you?” Carolynn asked.

“12 weeks yesterday.” You replied.

“How long have you known?” Jadah was next to ask her question.

“About 6 weeks.” Owen answered for you. “We wanted to wait a bit.”

“I knew the whole time.” Charlie boasted.

“Only because you live with us and there’s no way we would have been able to hide it from you.” You told him.

“When do you find out if it’s a boy or a girl?” Madi asked.

“She’s a girl.” Owen said. You groaned.

“Stop saying that. We don’t know yet and we won’t know for a little while, but Mr Psychic here seems to be convinced that it’s a girl.” You sighed slightly. 

“I just know it.” Owen said with a huff. 

“Any more questions?” You asked quickly, before he could get sulky. 

“I have one, do you know what a condom is?” Jeremy joked. Madi and Jadah gasped, both hitting his arm.

“We are children.” Jadah reminded him. You laughed.

“Yes.” You answered simply. Jeremy laughed. 

“Fair enough then.” 

You sat back and listened as the conversation moved into baby names, with everyone throwing out suggestions. 

You smiled softly, placing a hand on your stomach. Somehow this had become your life, and you wouldn’t change it for the world. 

[mayo-advance]

What Do You Know? Pt. 4

Discription: Y/n was in love with Pietro Maximoff. But he was gone now and all that remains is a miscast imposter and Y/n is going to do everything in their power to find closure.

A/n: I am pumping these out at an inhuman rate but they are also slowly getting more plot oriented. Also Peter is hopefully becoming more like Peter

Part 3 , Part 5

You had finally made it to your car and your feet hurt like a buttcheek on a stick after walking so many miles in two days.

You fumbled to unlock it while Peter rested his arms on the top of it. The hex had fried the buttons on your keys so you had to use the actual key.

“You know, we could have been here a lot faster if I had ran.” He quipped.

You looked up at him, “Well you could have said that a while ago Einstein.”

Peter smiled at you, “I just thought since you’re the one with the master plan that you would have thought of it.”

Finally you got your car door opened, and proceeded to unlock Peters door too, “Get in speedy.”

Peter got in surprisingly slowly looking around at the car in awe.

“What have you never seen a car before? Not everyone can run at the speed of sound y’know” You slammed you door shut, and he did the same. You buckled up and turned your car on.

“Well where I’m from, cars aren’t so.... high tech.” High tech? This was a white 2010 Impala Sedan that was being held together by force of will (and lack of money to get a new car) alone.

Peter looked at your confused expression, “...Wait, what year is it?”

You pulled out of the grassy spot you had your car parked and pulled onto a gravel road, “Its 2023.” He let out a small ‘oh’ and you glanced over at him, “Why what year is it where you’re from?”

You werent looking at Peter anymore but he was bouncing his leg again, “Before I was here it was 1983.”

If you had been drinking water you would have dramatically spit it out. 1983? What force whether it be Wanda or the other Witch had the power to pull him 40 years into his future?

You didnt know what to say except, “Ah so i’m legally escorting a senior citizen?” You switched back to sarcasm, not liking tense situations.

Peter let out a small laugh, “You better watch it young missy or i’ll have to ground you.”

You smiled and though you couldn’t see it, you knew he was too, “I’d like to see you try gramps.”

You rode in comfortable silence for a bit. Your head swam with questions but you had no clue where to start.

“So back there, you made a comment about.., us both being mutants? Or something like that...” You broke off for a second, trying to find the right words, “So what does that mean? To be a mutant?”

Peter looked over at you, confusion written all over his face “Aren’t you a mutant?”

“I don’t know what it means to be a mutant.” You saw a sign announcing youd soon arrive into New York state. “So I have no way of knowing if I am one.”

Peter wasnt exactly a genious when it came to knowing things about Mutants and their abilities, but he had to try his best to explain it to you, “Well mutants... We.... are born different. We just have powers that come from this gene thingy that... makes us different.”

You had never considered that your powers and you were just a prepackaged deal. You never knew where they had come from, they just showed up one day when a man was threatening you on the street.

He had you against a wall, and you didn’t know how to fight back well enough, and next thing you know he dropped you and gasped, and you weren’t visible.

Peter broke into your little train of thought, “Sorry for bringing it up, I just assumed that you were a mutant.”

As he sought a way to change the subject, Peter got an evil, scheming look in his eyes. “So Y/n,” he said in a teasing tone, “Tell me about your love life.”

No. No you werent ready for that discussion. You would rather go back to mutants. You werent ready to be that vulnerable in front of someone.

You sat up a little straighter and held you chin a little higher and curtly responded with, “theres not much to say, so anyways tell me more about mutants-”

“Cmooon, theres gotta be some special person in your life.” When you stayed silent he looked baffled, “Someone like you can’t possibly be single?”

You took a deep breath. Fine. If he wanted to know so badly. Besides, when he goes home you’ll never have to see him again.

The thought of never seeing him again made your chest ache. ‘Get your act together Y/n youve known him for only a few hours’

You started “Ok fine.... I had a boyfriend-“

[fratboykate]

I don't remember if it was on here on or on ao3 where you said Lexa would've reacted the same way if any of her kids died but the other characters assumed that she's being this bad because it was Jake and their special connection. Would that get touched on in later chapters? Like is anyone going to find out Lexa's feelings regarding her children (ie Costia and her teenage tantrums, Clarke's friends, etc.) 1/2

I never got the second part of this :( 

I’m also going to be super lazy and just answer some of the asks I got about Chapters 24/25 in this one post because I don’t feel like tagging everything or repeating myself lol. 

-okay KG, you got me with that last chapter. I had yet to cry this entire time, and then that update came for my whole life. but the real question…. where’s my manz Fish ran off to? did he just run off to his doggo home and was like, “fuck this, y'all wake me up when the screaming stops”

You literally have no idea how hard this made me laugh. “Doggo home” “my manz Fish” and “fuck this, y’all wake me up when the screaming stops” have got to be some of my favorite things I’ve ever read. Yo manz Fish is dead by now lmao. They got him when Costia was a baby and Costia is 14 now. Dogs aren’t immortal. Turtle is their new pup. I genuinely haven’t decided if Turtle is still alive right now or not. For the sake of argument lets say Turtle was…somewhere lol. He was hiding from the screaming or I didn’t want to call the animal wrangler to set and have him in the scene hahaha

-People say they like “angst” but the “angst” they like is “they can’t be together bc one if them is married, or oblivious” Your writing is more mature. It’s a fic, but it deals with a serious issue. People saying is “too much” or “unrealistic”, what about the people that come from war with ptsd, they ****** *******?? they get violent?? I agree with one of your followers, I thought Lexa in one of her outbursts was going to hit someone, I was waiting, good to know that will never happen!! - [I redacted this one and the next one cuz it had a chapter spoiler and I don’t know if everyone has read it yet]

-Hey friend! What a fine chapter that was–perhaps my favorite so far. Can’t understand the readers who didn’t see the ******* ***** coming. I thought you’ve dropped those breadcrumbs along the way. Also your depiction of mental illness is SO important. Society shoves it away, marks it as “bad,” and shames people who suffer its effects. Maybe it’s just me, but I much prefer stories that depict real life, the ups and downs and the unexpected twists, to an idealized, cotton-candy version. Don’t get me wrong–we all need some sweetness now and again and lord knows I have a handful of stories I consume that is purely fluff. But I’d take the realness any day, because we–as a society–need to shine more light on the aspects we’ve kept hidden. Thanks for continuing to write and share your story! Much peace to you xoxo

-I would just like to say, as someone with a mental illness and has family with mental illness, I appreciative that you show Clarke dealing and reaching her breaking point as well. Sometimes on tumblr i feel like some people go too far in the opposite direction, saying that if someone you love has a mental illness you essentially have to be understanding and be okay with everything they do regardless of the pain it causes you. My illness caused me to lash out at people and it wasnt fair to them.

-Anybody who thinks mental illnesses can’t get super ugly sure as shit don’t have any personal experience with it. I only know a few of people with BPD/PTSD and I’m not that close with them (friends of friends) yet I still know how messed up that shit can get for everyone involved. That’s one of my biggest pet peeves about media - and fandoms especially - the overwhelming predilection to romanticize/diminish emotional abuse and illness (physical or mental) It’s a terrible fucking message.

-So, I read your latest chapter to see how “dark and angst and fucked up” it got and I was disappointed??? From the overblown reactions, I expected Lexa to be behaving like some kind of horrible monster or the like, but, instead, it just seems like something taken out of my life five to eight years ago??? Like…I don’t know what to say. That right there is a perfect depiction of what having mental health problems is like. It’s very real and, to me at least, kinda tame??? I honestly expected much worse. Hell, I’ve DONE much worse (and I’m sure you have too, since you have BPD as well), so if people think that THIS chapter was unrealistic and too “fucked up”…HAHAHA! honey, y'all have no clue. No clue at all. Mental illness is not funny, amazing, or us trying to be difficult because we revel in drama. It fucking sucks, and sometimes it’s hard to just muster up enough energy to get out of bed. The voices? Yeah, those are there too. The whiners are idiots.

Yes, we don’t get nearly enough realistic portrayals of mental illness. Someone actually thought I was ticked off because people didn’t like the chapter. If you don’t like the fic, then don’t like the fic. I’m not offended by that in the slightest. What ticked me off was people’s reaction to the portrayal of a symptom of mental illness. Calling what happened “unrealistic” or “too much” when there’s people who live with it every day - me being one of them - is what ticked me off. Not because of the story, but because they thought dismissing those symptoms and making them out to be as a poorly used dramatic tool or something when it’s a thing people deal with every day of their lives is what irritated me. But whatever. I feel like only the first few dozen people were the ones that had a poor reaction to it. Everyone since then was amazing. On AO3 a mother who had a son die die 9 years ago wrote a comment saying this story resonated with her because it felt real to her or something along those lines and that shook me. If someone who has lived this kind of loss says “this is realistic” then that’s all I can strive for as a write. I like to tell stories that ring true to the human experience and it seems like this one may he hitting the mark.

-first of all, your story is amazing, it woke emotions in me, that even I didm’t know I had. How many chapters do you Think it would had? and how many until the Ultimatium? you are truly a gifted Writer, thank you. sorry for my English

Your English is good! Nothing to apologize for. I have no idea about the chapter count. I think we may be nearing the last dozen chapters or somewhere around there. At least for the main meat of the story. I’ll still have a fuck ton of chapters left and I’m thinking that if people are interested I can just keep adding those to the tail end once the main part is “completed”. We’ll see.  

-There’s just something about this rawness in your fic that makes it so good and impossible to stop reading. Like sure, it’s dark and there are uncomfortable bits to read but it’s so necessary? Pain demands to be felt!

-well you even said here that you have more “happy” chapters than the post jake ones written so, eventually there’s gonna be more at the end if you post them, but then really, your fic is probably the only one where sad and happy parts are equalized because you divide the chapters?!! why people can’t even do math??

-do you’ve any idea how aMAZING YOUR FIC IS??? THE ANGST IS SO WELL-WRITTEN AND HEART-WRENCHING AND AAAAAAH SO GREAT. x

-Okay that last chapter.. wow what a trip. I love pain? You really have a way with words! Your updates are so quick it’s amazing! Wow I just.. damn.. I have Lexa feels right now agh my heart

-The show of appreciation for the appreciation is appreciated!

-I’m a huge sap.. i just reread the chapter in which Roa got her appendix out and I’m crying at Lexa’s bedtime routines with her children ahhhhh the emotional depth in your writing is truly spectacular

-dude I really like your fic. it’s one of my favorites. The fact that it’s so raw and real makes it awesome. I know some people don’t like when things get too graphic (jake’s death) or even now with that new layer in the understanding of Lexa’s mental illness. but that really suits the fic (I think you should have gone all the way when describing jake’s death but I get it why you didn’t), and continue with the angsty please. we can understand the characters better in situations like this

THANK YOU!

-I hear people be givin you shit for that incredible fic that I have yet to get past chapter 2 (been lagging on that ;–;) it’s your story, love and I love it so far. Not everything in life is happy happy happpyyyy (P.S. can I hug you? I just love ya so much)

Lol…yes, you can most definitely hug me. I’m Latino. We love hugs. 

[wintersxsoul]

The Night We Danced

Summary: Two dorks in love that have to wait to get drunk to confess their feelings.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader

Word Count: 4k

Warnings: Maybe some language, drunk people and I think mentions of sex?? 

A/N: This is my entry for my dearest @writingsoftheloser 1k historical writing challenge! I got the Victorian Era, so I came up with this longass nonsense. I hope you enjoy and as always, feedback and reblogs are free and make me really happy and motivated <3

  Bucky Barnes was a dancer.

He sometimes had flashes of his old life in the late 30’s and 40’s, long summer nights dancing with beautiful dames, little Stevie by his side laughing and stepping in the ladies’ shoes. Everything was much more simpler, happier, but war happened and the dances turned into battles, the warm hands that he was used to hold became rifles and glocks. The jazzy tunes turned into gunfire, dates turned into risky missions and the thought of a long happy life turned into dust when he fell off that train.

Bucky Barnes stopped being a dancer to be a soldier, a spy, a deadly assassin.

They had taken all he was away, all his memories, his hopes and dreams. Everything was wiped but not his motor skills or knowledge. They turned him into the most efficient soldier, cold and calculating, his only motive in life was completing his missions. He had killed mercilessly, not questioning even once who was in front of the gun, he just knew he had to pull the trigger.

Everything changed the moment Steve Rogers, his best friend since childhood, found him 70 years after being used and tortured. Steve saved him from the claws of Hydra and gave him the opportunity to gain back his own self, to finally give his life meaning again.

His life changed drastically when he joined the Avengers, he could use his unrequired skills to help people, to save lives. He had his closest friends, Steve of course, Sam, Nat and then he met you. Once he was able to recover almost all his memories, he had a long heartfelt conversation with Natasha since she had suffered in similar ways. The brainwashing, the body killing training, the horrors of the Cold War and the cruelty of the Red Room.

You and Nat were inseparable, both becoming SHIELD agents the same year. You were a freelance hitwoman, both of your missions were to kill the same target. But before you could kill each other, SHIELD stepped in and rescued both of you, seeing your potential and the ability to do the missions other agents weren’t able to. When Bucky first came to the compound, you were away because your last mission went badly and it almost killed you, so Fury and Steve decided it was better for you to lay low for a while. Months went by and Bucky’s curiosity only grew, he really wanted to meet you, since everyone talked about you like you were an angel. When the time came to finally meet you, everything he ever heard about you was not nearly accurate to him. You were as much of a mystery as Nat, but unlike her, you opened up to him fastly, trusting him blindly. You both held each other on your worst nights and were also there for the other when you needed a good laugh.

You could have never imagined that the infamous Winter Soldier could be such an absolute dork with such a pure heart and soul. At first he was a bit sulky and moody, he was like a ghost around the compound, but months of therapy and help from his friends turned him into the man he was today, the man you loved deeply, even though you lied to yourself trying to make it seem like a platonic feeling. For years you remained as best friends, until the masquerade ball Tony organized for Natasha’s birthday.

“So, what are your plans for the party?” You asked Bucky nonchalantly while you looked for costume designers online. He looked up from his book and shrugged, he really didn’t know what you meant but he knew you would elaborate. You closed your laptop and placed it on your nightstand, all your attention on your friend now. You laid across the bed, resting your head on his lap. You were staring at the ceiling so you totally missed Bucky’s adoring gaze.

“Well, apart from getting hammered with Thor’s Asgardian alcohol, I don’t really know.” You rolled your eyes internally at his comment. You laid on your stomach so you could face him, your chin resting on your hands on top of his chest.

“Obviously you are doing that, but it’s not what I meant.” Bucky chuckled and you rolled your eyes. You weren’t sure about asking him to be your partner, maybe he was planning on going with someone else, maybe he wanted to go on his own. You cleared your throat while reaching out to fiddle with the laces of his hoodie nervously.

“Are you going with someone?” He frowned, realizing that you didn’t assume (like he did) that you were going together. Maybe you were planning to go with a date? He knew it had been more than a year since you had dated someone so maybe you wanted to use the party as an excuse to do so?

“What you mean with someone? I d-”

“You should ask Sarah from Forensics, I’ve heard she has a huge crush on you. She’s sooo soft and pretty. I have her number if you wa-”

“Okay, Y/n stop right there. I am not going with Sarah or with anyone else but you.” His eyes widened at his own boldness but he quickly found a logical explanation.

“I mean, we always go together to this kind of shitty parties we both dread. But if you are going with someone else is fine.”

“Yeah, yeah I just thought that maybe you wanted to go with an actual date and not your best friend.” He tousled your hair and you whined jokingly. He mumbled “dork” and you stuck your tongue out.

“My best friend is pretty cool and when she gets drunk the party starts, so I am not missing that for Sarah from Forensics.”

“Oh god James, and I am the dork? You absolute dumbass.” You shook your head in amusement and sat on the bed, putting your disheveled hair in a low ponytail. You slapped him lightly on the right shoulder and got down of the bed, gathering your stuff.

“I can’t stand to see that beautiful stupid face right now, I have to look for a fucking dress. You better wear something in dark red cause, you know it-”

“it’s my color” he mocked you using a high pitched tone of voice and laughed at the face of disgust you jokingly pulled off.

“Fuck you.”

“Why don’t you f-” His sentence was cut off by the bang of his door closing but you already knew what he said. You rolled your eyes and made your way to Nat’s room since you needed to organize shopping days and all that stuff.

-

Bucky Barnes was a dancer and fortunately he still had some moves, but waltzing was out of his league. He knew what a masquerade was of course, so the fact that he had to learn how to dance a completely different style was...frightening to say the least. He talked about it with Steve so they both were headed now to a masterclass while their dates were out shopping. Nat had asked Steve as her date because she wanted to go with his best friend. Their friendship was the most platonic you’ve ever seen and watching them flirt and banter was the highlight of your days. Nat was a fantastic dancer of course, she used to be a fucking ballerina, so she offered to teach you some moves. She was the only one who actually knew your feelings towards Bucky because you had confessed them one night you had drank your weight in vodka and when you saw Bucky’s text asking you to please be careful, you laughed and told her. You didn’t remember that conversation and when Natasha tried to ask you, she realized she shouldn’t bring up the topic until you were ready to believe it yourself.

“Ooof Nat, should I really buy this expensive dress?” You asked her while checking yourself out in the mirror. The dress was absolutely stunning, made of a dark red taffeta or a similar material, short sleeved and a beautiful v-neck, not very revealing but enough to make your babies pop. The bodice hugged your curves and the skirt was puffy.

“Listen, Stark is paying for everything, that includes our dresses. So yes, you are going to buy it.” She stood up and lead you back to the changing room so she could purchase both of your dresses.

Steve sighed heavily at Bucky’s complaints. They’d been dancing for four hours straight and they weren’t getting any better, or at least that’s what they thought. Bucky really couldn’t believe he had been dragged into this mess just because he loved getting drunk with you under any circumstances.

“Come on Buck, don’t worry. You two will probably be too drunk to even stand, why bother so much in learning this shit?” Bucky rolled his eyes and nudged his friend on the shoulder.

“Listen pal, I wanna do this right. You know how much I love dancing so this is just an excuse to learn something new.” He could almost believe his own lie, but Steve knew better. He knew Bucky better than himself, so he obviously knew the unspoken thing that was going on between two of his best friends.

“Okay buddy, whatever you say. I just hope Y/n appreciates all this instead of laughing at you like Sam and Nat are probably going to do.” He muttered something to himself and left the room without saying a word.

“Fucking idiots, I hope they fuck soon.” Steve said to himself before turning around and smiling at the dance teacher.

“Let’s do this Janet, I have a very dangerous woman to impress tonight.”

-

“I really, really, really, really regret the day I gave you access to come into my room whenever you want to.” You told Bucky, who was laying on your bed on his stomach, his face buried in the pillows. You slumped next to him and buried your face in the pillows as well. You really thought you looked like idiots but you couldn’t care less.

“Can we stay here? We can watch one of those victorian romantic movies you love and get wasted on our own.”

“You know I would love to, but Nat would kill us. Besides, you hate those movies.”

“I was just trying to persuade you Barnes, you don’t need to be so rude.” You stood up and opened your first drawer, pulling out the two masks you had bought throwing Bucky’s to his head and he responded with a fake “ouch”. He sat on the bed and looked at you amused, the small mask in his hands.

“And you have the nerve to call me rude. I already have my mask and I won’t show it to you until tonight.”

“Wow, sorry for thinking about you and your shitty memory, old man.”

“You know what Y/n? I’ll see you tonight before I throw myself out of that balcony.” You giggled at his fake tantrum. You really loved your friendship with Bucky, because even though you were always joking around each other, you had your backs. He was always there and so were you.

“You want me to walk you to your room?” He frowned at you but his eyes widened when he realized what you were about to say, but you said it before he could cut you off. “In case you don’t remember where your room is at.”

“That was one time Y/n, please let it go.”

“Never.” And with that said, he left. You giggled remembering the first night you two got drunk together. It was the first time Bucky had tried Thor’s alcohol so he was excited to finally get drunk after all those decades. He drank by himself almost three flasks and encouraged you to drink a bottle of vodka on your own, so at 6 am, you were stumbling through your room floor because Bucky had forgotten where his own room was, so he wanted to sleep at yours.

You took a last look at yourself in your mirror and placed the mask in its place. It was a shame that Bucky had decided not to wear the mask you’d bought for him, but his taste was pretty great so you knew it was going to be amazing.

When you reached the party the place was already full of people. Everyone was dancing to the slow melodies or drinking at the bar. You noticed that Tony had removed all the furniture from the room so it looked like a grand dance hall, the usual modern lamps he owned were replaced by huge golden crystal chandeliers, the windows were covered by thick curtains that looked like the ones European palaces had. The cream and golden tones of all the decoration gave a really regal look to the party, the soft glow of the candles in the bar and the sound of champagne glasses relaxed your senses.

You fixed your long silk gloves and sighed, moving through the crowd towards the bar, where Nat stood chatting with who you assumed it was Steve, Sam was behind the counter pouring alcohol to his half empty glass.

“You mind filling this lady’s glass?” Sam smirked and you winked at him. He raised his eyebrow under his cream and red mask and he took out a tall glass.

“What would the lady like to drink?” He rested both of his palms in the counter, looking at you with an amused look in his eyes.

“Vodka on the rocks, s'il vous plait.” You heard Nat choke on her drink and Steve turned to look at you while Sam just poured your drink, a smile playing on his lips.

“Aren’t we starting a bit early, Y/n? Your date is not even here.” You shrugged at Sam’s comment and took the glass when he handed it.

“Since you all seemed so surprised with my drinking choices, I’m going. I need an unjudging friend right now.” You waved your hand gracefully and moved towards the centre, trying to find Bucky. After five minutes and an empty glass, you saw his bulking figure talking to some woman. You needed a moment to gather your thoughts because he looked absolutely sinful with the outfit he was wearing. The black pants marked all his muscles, specially his thighs, those fucking thighs that drove you insane and his ass...you shook your head trying to stop your mind. You needed another drink.

“Wow look who’s back and empty handed!” Steve said to the small group. You nudged him in the ribs and asked Sam for another glass of alcohol.

“Why are you this flustered Y/n?” Nat asked you when she noticed your flushed cheeks. You fixed your mask trying to hide your nervousness and failing miserably.

“I really don’t know what you’re talking about.” Your three friends shared a knowing look and you rolled your eyes, finishing your drink in two sips and encouraged by the burning liquid, you went to where Bucky was. You could now see his whole outfit perfectly and your heart swelled. He was wearing a black ruffled shirt with a black and dark red embroidered vest and a black tail coat. His face was covered by a simple half Venetian mask, decorated with the same colors as the outfit’s. He was chatting with some agent you couldn’t recognize and you felt a pang of jealousy at how he was looking at her, smiling and touching her. At that moment you realized the alcohol was kicking in and that’s why you were having those stupid thoughts. You approached your friend and placed your gloved hand to his shoulder, indicating him that you were besides him and waiting for him to pay attention to you. You catched a part of the conversation and they were talking about one of the last missions the undercover agents did, so after a court nod from Bucky and a brief goodbye from her, his eyes were on you.

“Well, look at you!” He smiled at you warmly and you felt something flip inside you. “How did you recognize me?”

“Oh boy, you can mask that face all you want but you can’t mask those thighs.” You smirked and he started laughing at your comment, making you feel proud of your wittiness.

“How drunk are you already?” You brought your hand up between your bodies and pressed your thumb and index together whispering “a little” so only he could hear it.

“Lucky for you, I drank almost a flask, so that makes us dangerous already. Wanna dance?” He extended his hand and you took it accepting his invitation. You suddenly felt really nervous since it was the first time you were going to slow dance with him but unbeknown to you, Bucky Barnes felt sick due to his nerves. He wanted this to work, he wanted to show you and the world that he was still capable of being a soft person, not this cold calculative soldier with a dark past.

The feeling of his hand on your waist and your other hands intertwined was intoxicating you, your bodies pressed together, the only thing between you two were your clothes. You spinned around the room for what felt like eternity, time for you had stopped and everyone had disappeared.

You burst the small bubble you were both in saying you needed a drink, Bucky stopped swaying you and with your hands still intertwined, went to the empty bar.

“I’ve always loved the Victorian Era, you know?” He said while giving you a glass full of vodka, and took a sip of his flask. “The clothes, the courting, the chivalry and all that fuss.” He smiled sadly at you thinking that you wouldn’t notice.

“If you could, would you go back in time and stay?”

He took another sip, now longer, and shook his head. “Of course not, you wouldn’t be there.” He blurted out without thinking and you just giggled at the comment.

“Oh Barnes, don’t be so dramatic. I’m sure you would make good friends there as well.” You gave him a sincere smile and he shook his head again, taking another sip of the flask, this time a long one. You looked down at your glass and twirled the straw, looking at how the ice cubes collided with each other.

“I love you.” You jerked your head up and maybe it was the alcohol clouding your mind or the denial of your own feelings, but you didn’t notice his intense gaze, filled with love and adoration.

“And I love you too, you idiot. As my best friend, you should know that already.” You placed your lips around the straw and finished the whole drink, Bucky still looking at you shocked that you rejected his feelings without you noticing.

“No, Y/n, what I mean is that I’m-”

“You are what, Barnes?” Nat cut Bucky off and you threw yourself into her arms, kissing her face and wishing her a happy birthday. “I missed you, Nat. Where were you?” You started talking to her totally ignoring your friend, who got that as his cue to leave the party. He would never blame you for not feeling the same or not even noticing his feelings, that was totally on him, but he didn’t feel well enough to stay in the party. He knew you wanted him there, to get drunk together and then both of you ending up throwing up in the sink and the toilet, but tonight he needed to breathe, he needed to get out of the crowd.

“Hey, where is going Bucky?” Asked Steve while he approached Nat and you. You frowned and looked at the entrance, catching a glimpse of Bucky’s broad shoulders and hair leaving the party. “I’ll be back in a sec.” You said and stumbled down the bar stool, heading towards the entrance half running.

“We both know they are not coming back, right?” Steve said to Nat, a strong nod and a sigh answered his comment.

You ran as fast as your drunken state let you but before you could notice you slipped with the dress and fell.

“FUCK” You screamed to the empty hall and took off your heels and gloves, standing up trying not to fall again on your ass. Bucky was nowhere to be seen so you headed to his room, your head spinning due to the alcohol.

“What are you doing here?” Bucky startled you, making you lose balance but he caught you before you could fall again.

“I was just checking that you got to your room safely, since you know, you get lost and all that.” You laughed at his fake hurt expression and straightened your clothes. You noticed that he had taken off his mask and that you were still wearing yours. “Why did you leave?”

“I’m feeling a bit sick, I think I drank too mu-”

“James, if you don’t tell me what the fuck is wrong I’ll torture you until you do. The drinking excuse is the worst you could’ve used with me.”

Bucky sighed defeated, he knew he had to get it off his chest, after three years carrying this on his own, he needed to let the words out, he needed you to know. He reached for the laces of your mask and took it off, placing a strand of hair behind your ear and cupping your cheek.

“I love you, Y/n.” You rolled your eyes in fake annoyance just to mess up with him.

“Baby, we already established that I lov-”

“Y/n, you are not listening. I am in love with you. I want to be your best friend, your lover, your partner in crime and your drunk buddy.”

You stared at him wide eyed, not knowing what to answer or to do. He caressed your cheek with his thumb and you gasped at the feeling, making Bucky think that you were rejecting the act. You stopped him from moving his hand and he leaned in, his lips brushing yours lightly.

“Either you kiss me or I faint, so make a m-” And just like that, his lips crashed against yours with a passion and hunger you’ve never felt in your entire life. He pressed you against the door, the stupid huge dress stopping you from feeling anything. Your brain finally woke up and you realized what was going on. Bucky Barnes loved you, he was in love with you. And you were in love with him. You pulled away and stopped him, making him step backwards scared that he did something you didn’t want to.

“You love me?” You really asked him, thinking that maybe your brain was betraying you. He nodded and looked away, not wanting to see the rejection in your eyes.

“Hey coward, look at me.” You held his chin and forced him to look at you. “I love you too, always have. I was just too damn scared to admit it to even myself.” He smiled and kissed you again, this time slower, pouring every ounce of love he had for you in the kiss.

“What now?” He asked you once he pulled away to breathe. He had his hand on the back of your neck, caressing your skin with his thumb.

“As much as I’d love you to fuck me against every surface on that room, I am drunk and tired and I need to process everything.” He nodded and waited for you to come up with what you wanted to do next. “So you are going to take this dress off me carefully cause I can’t do it on my own and it’s expensive as fuck, you are going to give me one for your shirts and we are sleeping, together.” He nodded again and smiled, leaning in again to give your lips a small peck.

“Consider it done, asshole.”

[peacheenie]

hl1/2 gordon scentric hc time

im rly feeling half life in this chillis tonight so....some....hc’s about everyones favourite free man, i have a lot so enjoy

-he’s actually mute and uses sign language but only about 50% of the time cuz people either don’t know what he’s saying or he can’t do it whilst holding like 20 different guns/weapons to protect himself so instead he makes big gestures a lot or writes down what hes trying to say (pretty much everyone at black mesa could understand him via sign language so he was very comfortable using it, during hl2 however he has to keep reminding himself not everyone is fluent and it frustrates him to no end)

-when he tries to speak it hurts and the most sound he can make is mumbles or little sqeaks so if theres ever a time he needs to alert someone to dangers reeeal quick he ends up hurting his throat a lot to try and make some kind of warning noise thats loud enough, he can hum tho and enjoys humming along to music as well as when he’s signing to try and convey some kind of emotion along with his facial features of which he emotes a LOT

-his hand writing looks like that of an actual dotors and its neat cursive but very hard to read so if he’s trying to write as a form of communication he just defaults to caps with big spaces inbetween and people (barney) tease him about it constantly (barney)

- hes incredibly short sighted without his glasses and ends up squinting a lot without them on and since he’s usualy default bitch facing he just looks very angry all the time when really he just cant see anything please dont be offended sir he didnt mean to upset you

-is actually very scared all the time abt like everything, hes literally just a scientist who just happened to be “the right man in the wrong place” and was just so determined to try and save those around him during the cascade that he pushed thorough his fears and anxiety to try and get the job done but he def has some form of ptsd after it all, barnicles specifically really freak him out because getting strangled and slowly lifted off of the ground into a row of razor sharp teeth is fucking TERRIFYING and he wouldnt wish it on anyone

-only reason he knows how to use guns is because barney would regularly take him down to the shooting range during their breaks and they’d see who could shoot straightest after a few drinks, barney would always win.

-after hl1 when he was put into stasis and he wakes up in hl2 hes lost like 20 years of his life and hates that fact terribly, all his friends have aged around him but hes still in his 20′s when he shouldnt be and he hates it so fucking much

-he also finds himself missing the feeling of the HEV suit terribly during the begining of his re-awakening in city 17, he’d grown so used to the feeling of it on him and keeping him safe that it makes him anxious without it and the cold air on his hands is also uncomfortable so he prefers wearing gloves all the time, when he finally gets the HEV suit back it feels like a weight has been lifted and he can finally stop worrying, the suits voice is also a comforting sound beccause its familiar and a sign that he’s not alone, same goes with the healing station and suit charging noises; they’re a comforting sound to hear and he enjoys humming along to the vrwwwrrrr vrrwwrrr vrwrrrrwr the machine makes when he plugs into the port

-he worries about overdosing on the healing stations a lot though; the morphone they give out is indefinite and once during the casade he’d passed out from taking to much and woken up to a zombie very slowly approaching him from down a corridoor but with how drowzy he was it was it was a horrible struggle to lift the gun and fire between dozing in and out

-he gets attached to people quickly since also during the cascade days he’d regularly meet people in danger who only had him to keep them safe so he tries his absolute hardest to make sure he can protect people even if that means he gets shot in the process, the suit usually protects him/heals him anyway so he’s used to it and if theres danger he almost default/automatically moves infront of people to make sure they���re okay without any concern for his own safety

-he also reeeally likes antlions and will pet them any chance he gets, he tried to do it when he first saw them and almost lost a hand so it makes him upset he has to kill them but when he finally gets the bug bite from the vorts? ohhhhohohoh he pets so many antlions, it again makes him sad he has to use them as like fodder for turrets and stuff but if an antlion comes back to him after taking down a turret or killing a combine he gives them extra pets and becomes a very proud papa

-since hes technically in his 30′s (and would be nearing his 40′s had he not been in stasis) he feels more of a big brother/fatherly bond toward Alyx since he’d also met her as a baby and finds any romantic involvement with her awkward, (so Elli’s comment on him “wanting grandkids” he ends up slapping the man on the arm with a frown to which Eli just laughs) this doesn’t help his attachment issue though so when they have to seperate to do things away from the other he worries for her safety even though she constantly assures him she can take care of herself and he KNOWS she can. he still really can’t help but worry though...

after hl2 ep2:

-when eli dies i dont like to think they all straight away go to mossman and instead get to spend some time mourning at the base, this gives gordon some time to finally sit down and relax for a little bit but he finds it incredibly hard to even take off the HEV suit at first because to him there was no passage of time between being put into stasis and waking up in city 17 all those years later; he’d closed his eyes, went into the portal and then the next second awakened in a completely unfamiliar place, in unfamiliar clothes with unfamiliar people (he definitely had a panic attack before geting off that very first train) and the thought of that happening again when he’s not prepared is terrifying.

-when he does finally take off the suit (after a lot of helping and reasuring from alyx, kleiner and barney a LOT from barney; theyre very good friends (;) he takes to wearing very comfy and heavy clothes such as jumpers, ponchos etc as well as a bullet proof vest because it makes him feel safe, the HEV suit gloves he retires entirely cuz theyre gross, definitely covered in his own blood and have been through hell so instead he has a bunch of different pairs he cycles through depending on how he feels that people around the base give him after learning about his fondness towards them

-he secretly carries a gun around with him even when they’re not in any danger becaus it’s another added layer of security and becaus he literally can’t trust things to not go bad EVER; now though nothing will go wrong again on his watch because he’ll be ready for it!! this really doesn’t help with his nerves though since he’s constantly looking for something to go wrong

scene specific hc’s:

-i always think abt that one specific sene in the train that gets derailed where alyx is trapped by a stalker and gordon has to pull it away with his gravity gun and i always imagine him franticly pulling it away with so much alarm on his face and such panic, when shes free though and has to stop to catch her breath gordon would give her a hug and make sure she’s okay cuz it must have been terrifying to have that thing screaming inches from ur face, gordon just instantly  goes into protect mode

-another scene that always comes to mind is when you first encounter an advisor and it makes that horrid loud noise where alyx is holding her head; i imagine gordon almost dropping the gravity gun in a panic to try and cover his ears because he doesn’t handle loud noises too well and it freaks him out so much alyx has to help him get out of the room since he kind of locks up on hearing it

-same goes when you get trapped by an advisor in a barn and almost become food for it; gordon is absolutely terrified at getting so up and close without being able to move that when it finally does drop him he starts hyperventilating and alyx has to protect him from the oncoming combine for a little while before he can catch his breath

-last scenes but some of my favorites are the ENTIRE sections of gordon being up close with breen, 

first being the teleporter malfunctioning and when gordons heavy breathing i imagine hes trying super hard not to start freaking out/hyperventilating and when breens doing his “i want that twink obliterated” spiel and then looks up and says his name, gordon almost looses it and internally is like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

second is when youre trapped in that like...metal contraption thing the stalkers are carried in and brought to breens officce and that entire section where breen is talking directly TO YOU i just adore it becausee gordon would have been looking away awkwardly unable to actually respond and furrowing his eyebrows at the nerve breen has upon thinking you would ever agree to any such terms and would definitely also spit in breens face as a response just like alyx did since he can’t use words

okay that is all, if you read all of these you’re amazing and i love u and also gordon hes an amazing “character” because i can insert as many of my own quirks into him as i please because valve literally never gave him a personallity :^)

[cotton-corduroy]

@carelessslither tagged me in this so im gonna do it. cool? cool.

Do you make your bed? not unless im having people over. someone told me once that making your bed made a comfier enviorment for bacteria and i hate the way those fuckers look under a microscrop so i tell myself im not making my bed so less microorganisms leave me alone. but really? i dont give a shit. fuck water bears (not actually i mean like those whores w the flagellum n ameobas fucking cucks)

What’s your favourite number?  i have 4, making me pick between them is impossible. 27 29 36 41. first 2 are dates- ill let you figure out the other two.

What is your job? ive been a cashier at target for a year come say hi ill let u steal a pack of gum im real good friends w our security guard

If you could go back to school, would you? oh i would in a heartbeat. i cant go to school rn and it hurts knowing that my life cant exactly go where id like it to.

Can you parallel park? idk what paralellel means

A job you had that would surprise people? i got paid once to imput data for a shopping cart on a website. also not really a job but i volunteered at a bunny rescue and helped them clean over 40 cages every saturday morning.

Do you think aliens are real? of course, and anybody who doesnt is pretty self centered to think were the only planet out here that sustains life

Can you drive a manual car? whats a car

What’s your guilty pleasure? sims 4 lets plays on youtube- usually by james turner (ive seen his entire super sim challenge LP, binge watched it across a real bad mental health week). also i think i can add playing minecraft (w my partner but thats nowhere near the guilty part) onto this list now

Favourite colour? yellow 

Favourite type of music? the type that makes you grit your teeth and raise an eyebrow at. questionable talent from the lead singer and dingy guitar. the lyrcis are about smoking cigarettes again and being real fuckin sad. (brian sella if u read this im sorry)

Things that people do that drive you crazy? recently its been people who respond to my “how are you?” at work with “i need bags”. but in general its being talked over. and the fact i cant stop fucking apologising for everything. im annoying lol

Do you like doing puzzles? doing jigsaws actually makes me feel so fucking insecure bc they take me forever. i dont have the brain (or eyes? i suppose) for it. one of those things i try to avoid so i dont hate myself, stupid as it sounds. like damn vin its just a puzzle. (but i do like a good challenge- like solving shit is fun n rewarding but im such an overthinker and over-connect-the-dot-er that it never goes well) can you tell i didnt know if they meant puzzles as in riddles or puzzles as in jigsaws? askdjf

Any phobias? i have aquaphobia, which has been pretty managable up until lately. i also still get a sinking feeling in my stomach whenever i see a large fish in person (i used to have gnarly icythophobia but thats just from child me and a bad supermarket). and fuck isopo.ds i hate them i hope they all perish

Favourite childhood sport? probably baseball? horse riding wasnt rly my thing n football got boring bc i was goalie n i wasnt allowed to sit down n make daisy chains. also i loved eating sunflower seeds.

Do you talk to yourself? too much honestly. either to get out of a meltdown or im triggering one

What movie do you adore? the labyrinth. i can watch it over and over and over. 

Coffee or tea? i love a good cuppa but im gonna have to say coffee bc i drink it way more often

First thing you wanted to be growing up? i vividly remember this bc we had a board in my year 3 class where we wrote what we wanted to say- i wanted to be an author. i only remember this bc my classmate named jeremy said he wanted to own a golf course but i read it wrong n thought he wanted to be a golf course. a comment ab my inadibilty to read and ironic desire to be an author was promptly pointed out

i tag: nobody its 2.30 in the morning and ive been rambling ab myself for 20 minutes. nobodys gna actually read this and i litchrally am so braindead rn idk who any of u ppl are or what my name is i just wanted to chat 

[astridthevalkyrie]

call me, beep me, if you wanna reach me: chapter two

‘did you really just send me off with the kim possible theme song’ ‘if you just call my name!’ ‘wow, you’re a bit of a dork, aren’t you?’

dedicated to @twiggy242 because he promised me a review at the second chapter and i would like it the second he finished reading.

Hiccup is plain. Astrid is italicized. Ruffnut is underlined.

(10:11) knock knock

(10:15) really?

(10:15) this is how were gonna start the day?

(10:17) knock knock

(10:17) alright, fine

(10:17) whos there

(10:18) annie

(10:18) annie who?

(10:20) annie-thing you can do, i can do better!

(10:21) i can tell knock-knock jokes better than you!

(10:21) nice clapback.

(10:23) thanks, i try

(10:23) knock knock

(10:25) doctor

(10:25) DOCTOR WHO????

(10:26) nope, just the regular doctor!

(10:26) but then how will we time travel?

(10:27) wait, hang on

(10:27) before we go on

(10:27) i have to ask you something super important

(10:29) yeah?

(10:29) youre not…..

(10:30) a superhwolockian, are you?

(10:30) cause that is make or break for any possible friendship here

(10:33) okay listen

.(10:34) ...you didnt

(10:34) how could you do it?

(10:35) individually, those are some good shows!

(10:36) also

(10:36) for me

(10:36) it was

(10:36) uh

(10:38) dont do it

(10:38) superavengewholock

(10:39) oh my god

(10:39) I was young and impressionable!

(10:40) youre dead to me

(10:41) well then I guess this friendship is over before it even started.

(10:41) i wouldnt call us friends

(10:41) more like

(10:41) mutual joke tellers?

(10:42) at least before that god awful knock knock joke

(10:42) you don’t hold back, do you?

(10:46) nah, id rather not

(10:47) your dorkiness has terminated whatever this was

(10:48) you have gotten EVERY reference I’ve made so far.

(10:48) and I will bet 20 bucks that you are as big a dork as I am.

(10:50) nope, im one of the cool kids

(10:50) fine.

(10:51) but I hate when friendships end.

(10:52) like in the harry potter books

(10:52) when luna and neville stop being friends to date instead.

(10:54) what?

(10:55) luna and neville didnt end up with each other in the books, neville married hannah abbott

(10:55) and luna married rolf scamander

(10:55) HA

(10:55) THAT WASNT IN THE BOOKS.

(10:56) YOU JUST KNOW THAT

(10:56) BECAUSE YOU’RE

(10:56) goddammit

(10:56) A

(10:56) DORK

(10:57) ugh

(10:58) victory is sweet, viking.

*********

(10:32) hey so you know how i borrowed your hw that one time

(10:35) you dont wanna do this, ruff

(10:37) i may or may not want it again

(10:37) RUFF

(10:38) i dont wanna read the articles suuuuuue me!

(10:39) trump did blah blah and idiots are everywhere i dont need articles to tell me that

(10:58) it might do you some good

(11:00) wow respond late much

(11:00) i was texting someone else

(11:01) tuff?

(11:01) no

(11:01) that girl in your physics class?

(11:02) no

(11:02) your mom?

(11:02) no!

(11:06) who else do you have to text? i should be your one and only priority right now

(11:06) that guy i texted by accident yesterday

(11:07) he could be some serial killer or stalker you know

(11:07) eh, whats he gonna do, track me through my texts?

(11:10) yeah, thats EXACTLY it, dummy

(11:12) hard to believe teachers like you so much when you sound like an idiot half the time

(11:13) oh, relax, were just talking and joking around

(11:13) and if youre so smart, you can do those articles on your own

(11:14) nooooooooooo

(11:14) i promise not to say anything more

(11:14) text as many weird boys as you want

(11:14) do you want me to search up numbers for you

(11:15) will that make you give me the answers

(11:15) im not giving you jack SHIT, ruff

(11:19) what if i agree to hook up with you

(11:19) oh my gosh

(11:20) you make one passing comment and suddenly you friend thinks youre in love with her

(11:21) its okay, astrid, i know im hot

(11:23) youre not that hot when youre bugging me

(11:24) shall i whisper seductively in your ear instead

(11:24) *whispers* give me your homewoooork

(11:26) astrid

(11:28) are you texting your boy again i swear astrid

(11:28) aaaaastrid

*********

(11:24) hello gorgeous what is your name

(11:24) you have about three minutes to explain

(11:25) ajhgjhegfh

(11:25) rugerhgggggggggr45

(11:25) uh…

(11:25) dork?

(11:26) oh gods, i’m sorry.

(11:26) my cousin got my phone and he

(11:26) well, you know.

(11:27) is this the same cousin you were playing chess with?

(11:27) bingo.

(11:28) he seems like quite the character

(11:29) oh, he is.

(11:30) it’s always “look at hiccup and how small he is” and “hiccup is a loser but i am the benevolent cousin and i still love him”

(11:30) aww

(11:32) wait hold the fuck up

(11:32) okay, potty mouth.

(11:33) your name is HICCUP????????

(11:33) ah

(11:33) shit.

(11:34) tell me your name is not hiccup

(11:36) would if i could, viking.

(11:36) omg tell me your name is NOT hICCUP

(11:37) MY PARENTS THOUGHT IT WOULD WARD OFF GNOMES AND TROLLS

(11:37) gnomes and trolls?

(11:37) holy shit

(11:37) youre not from berk are you?

(11:38) uh, yeah.

(11:38) how’d you know?

(11:38) (creep).

(11:39) oh shush

(11:40) youre a few towns away from me everyone talks about you guys and your weird traditions

(11:40) YOU TOTALLY GO TO HOOLIGAN HIGH DONT YOU

(11:41) seriously is this information just common knowledge or

(11:41) YOUR TEAMS SUCKS AT TENNIS

(11:43) more of a basketball person myself, wouldn’t know.

(11:43) this is the greatest day of my life

(11:44) is this pick on hiccup day?????

(11:45) yes, HICCUP, it is

(11:45) oh gods.

(11:45) what do you call it when you have a stomach spasm

(11:46) NOT ORIGINAL.

(11:46) A HICCUP

(11:46) HA

*********

(11:48) his name is hiccup

(11:55) oh my gosh, what a loser

(11:56) oh noooo, youre into losers

(11:56) youre fucked

(11:56) were all doomed

(11:56) oh yeah i got the homework from an obscure website

(11:57) so suck on that hofferson

(11:59) (you nerd go get the weirdo)

[thehyperkraken]

EDIT: yall idk why the actual fic isnt showing up in the tags but this shit is, bc thats literally the opposite of what i wanted, but for the love of god read the fic first and/or instead, that’s the thing i spent more than 20 minutes on: [link]

Hey random idea dump for that one fic i done did yeehaw... it’s almost longer than the fic itself but jesus christ i need to get these ideas out of my head and throw them into the internet ether, seriously don’t read this its a goddamn mess

So ghjkdf the actual plotty part of that fic came from that one b99 bit... the Bone one.....u kno

Arthur: Come on, Dutch. The O'Driscolls thing isn't the problem. You're in a bad mood because you've been so busy planning this heist that it's keeping you and Hosea apart. You two just need to bone. John: Oh no... Dutch: ...What did you say? John: Don't say it again! Arthur: I said you two need to bone. John: Oh my god... Dutch: (with barely contained fury) Hhhhhow Dare you Arthur Morgan, I am thIS GANG'S LEADER!!! You have NO RIGHT to comment on my sex life— (5 minutes later) Dutch, standing on top of a table screaming: BONE?!?!?! (10 minutes later) Dutch: What happens in my bedroom, son, is NONE of your business— (20 minutes later) Dutch, jumping up and down on the table: BOOOOOOONE!!!!!!!!! (40 minutes later) Dutch: And don't EVER speak to me like that AGAIN! (storms off) John, sunken down in his chair in horror: Why the hell did you do that? Arthur: (shrugs) They need to bone. John: Gross, Arthur! That's our dads!

And then like a day later gfdhkg

John: Oh hey Dutch! I know you don't want to talk about Hosea, BUT, I had an idea— Dutch: No need, John, it's all good. John: So... your fight with Hosea is over? Dutch: Yep. John: Because you finally figured out a plan for the heist...? Dutch: Nope! Arthur, excitedly: Because you guys—? Dutch: Yyyyep! Arthur, looking smug: Knew it. John: Ugh... Arthur: (leans down close to him) See, what happened is, our dads had sex— John: UGH, SHUT UP!

Another inspiration I had was John Mulaney’s bit about zoning out for John with adhd,,,,, the part where he’s like “the doctor was reading me the results of a blood test, it was IMPORTANT that I LISTENED, but NO, I zoned out, I was like, I’m just gonna stare at the wall and think m’thoughts” that’s why I wrote the part where John was like “ehhh attention deficient something something disease” bc it made me laugh gjhggdjh

Dutch: so the doctor says you have ADHD John: (thinking about minecraft) what?

Also unrelated but blease consider Arthur teaching John to drive like

Arthur: are you watching the road? John: ........I am looking through the windshield Arthur: John: .......and I’m not gonna hit anyone...... Arthur: John: ....but no. I’m thinkin’ about minecraft

(Also I don’t know anything about ssb I’ve played it once and hated it, minecraft is my og video game love, but Abigail beating John at ssb is funnier, I’m a fake gamer boy :^( rip)

ONE MORE INSPIRATION THAT ONE VINE ITS MY FAVORITE VINE

Arthur: are you drinking coke for breakfast? John: yeah, what did you have for breakfast? Arthur: ........nothing John: (sipping his drink) I’m doing better than you, then

Anyway onto ACTUAL IDEA STUFF HOORAY

So when Dutch and Hosea decided to adopt, they agreed they wanted to take in kids who needed good homes the most, so they were specifically looking for older kids who would probably age out of the system and wind up on the streets

They met Arthur who was a clearly depressed and gender non conforming thirteen year old who hated everyone and everything and wasn’t getting the Love he Deserved, and Dutch was like “I want THAT ONE, with the SAD EYES”

Arthur tried to push them away at first, cuz he absolutely didn’t trust anyone, and some part of him believed they’d just give him right back up for adoption if he disappointed them in any way. But he eventually learned that they were good guys who really just wanted to help him, and they weren’t gonna abandon him if he wasn’t the perfect kid they always wanted

(he probably told them about this fear eventually and Hosea just snorted and was like “if we wanted a perfect kid we woulda got a cabbage patch doll. something that wouldn’t scream or make a mess” and Dutch was like “yeah! or like a 27 year old with a job and their own house and kids of their own. pre-made grandkids” and Hosea was like “or a cat” and Arthur was like “...okay”)

Anyway it took a loooong time but Arthur eventually trusted them enough to come out to them as trans, without really knowing the proper words for everything, just knowing that He Is A Boy And That’s That. As much as Hosea is the one the lads go to to talk about stuff and get comfort and Wise Dad Advice, he probably told Dutch first bc he was more uncertain how he’d respond and he wanted to get it over with in the worst way possible.... like, if they were gonna react badly, heap all the bullshit on in one fell swoop

I imagine he did it off the cuff too, in response to something Dutch said, like Dutch was like “u get back here right now young lady” and Arthur was like “first of all I’m not a lady, I’m a BOY, and second of all FUCK you, I do what I WANT” and Dutch was like “groovy. you’re grounded.” Arthur was like (offended) “don’t say groovy... don’t try to be hip” and Dutch was like “no it’s totally tubular that ur a boy. It’s absolutely funky. You’re fucking grounded though”

Then he went and told Hosea like “congrats! it’s a boy” and they helped him transition and they didn’t tolerate a single person misgendering him the whole time. Like before he’s even begun transitioning, they’re literally at the doctors office to discuss it w/ their doc for the first time, and a nurse is like “ms. morgan?” And Dutch is like “INCORRECT” and the doctor is like “what seems to be the problem (deadname)?” and Dutch is like “FOOL! THIS CHILD WAS LABELED INACCURATELY, WE REQUIRE A GENDER RETRACTION” and Hosea’s like “please stop yelling”

Anyway probably about a year later they got John when he was ten and Arthur was fifteen. Arthur was a little bit jealous like, wow, am I not enough kid for u, but Dutch and Hosea always planned on getting at least two bc they wanted them to have siblings, and they know John came from a pretty abusive situation, so Arthur can’t be too mad at him. At least until he met John and realized what a fucking brat he is

Since John was younger and way more desperate for affection, he immediately loved Dutch and Hosea just bc they were nice to him, he was ready to call them his dads within the month but he was nervous that it was too soon and they’d be weirded out. But I imagine he got triggered by something and had a meltdown and they got to see just a glimpse of what he’d been through, and Dutch and Hosea were falling over themselves trying to comfort him and tell him they love him and now I’m making myself cry :’^(

Anyway... from that point on John was like “these are the only dads I’ve ever had and I would kill a man for them.” He gets in trouble quite a bit bc he’s Naughty, but Dutch and Hosea always make sure to punish him fairly and never yell or be physically intimidating with him or permanently take away his stuff, like they make him do chores to earn back the right to use the xbox or something. And they always explain to him exactly what he did wrong and why he’s being punished and talk to him about how he can make it better or what he can do next time, or if there’s a root problem, like he’s acting out bc he’s overwhelmed with school work or smthn, how they can help him. Especially after he gets diagnosed with ADHD

And of course they do all this with Arthur too, but they make a special concerted effort with John bc he’s The Baby :^) and Dutch somehow maintains an attitude of “idk what ur talking about, John has never done anything wrong ever in his life” every time he gets in trouble meanwhile Hosea is like “what do you MEAN, he’s a GREMLIN” fjfjfhhf

Arthur was probably diagnosed with depression and anxiety at some point... it was probably a long process to get him to even admit he had a problem bc he didnt wanna bother anyone... Arthur also probably came from an abusive situation from the way canon Arthur talks about his dad, but Arthur is much more the type to be like “i’m gonna keep all my feelings inside, and then one day, i’ll die” whereas John is like “i will SCREAM if i get a papercut”

[EDIT: i woke up in a cold sweat at 4 AM with this in my head so now i’m putting it here

Charles: So, Arthur... Do you wanna talk about your feelings? Arthur: No. John: I do! :) Charles: ...I know, John. John: I’m sad! :) Charles: I know, John.

i’m sure it’s been done before but it’s so good. ok now back to our regularly scheduled programming]

In regards to Arthur being trans, John doesn’t really Get It, Arthur tried to explain it to him once and John couldn’t care less, all he knows is Arthur used to be a girl or something, there’s tea involved probably, and John is thinking about minecraft again... he has 2 am thoughts about it sometimes and comes to Arthur like “what IS gender” and Arthur’s just like “hm. big mood”

Dutch is “Dad” and Hosea is “Papa” or “Pa” or “Pops” or “Dad, No Not You, The Other One” or “Other Dad.” Hosea really doesn’t mind at all, he wouldn’t care if the kids called him Hosea or mom or anything else, it truly isnt important to him. But Dutch Loves being Dad. Every time they call Dutch Dad he grows three times stronger and 10 years are added to his lifespan. Dutch is an Alpha Parent, he 100% goes to every parent teacher conference and bake sale, he’d go to every game and concert too if either of his kids had a single athletic or musical bone in their dumb little bodies. I guess the school probably hosts art galleries sometimes to display art the kids make, Arthur always has a drawing in one of those, and Dutch will absolutely go just to brag about his cool son.

Dutch is the Fun Energetic Dad who embarrasses the boys in front of their friends but can always be talked into taking them out to get ice cream. Hosea is the more quietly anxious dad, he makes sure they do their homework and keep their rooms clean and shit, and he's the one the kids always go to talk to when they’re having problems... like Arthur will rant for an hour and a half about high school drama and Hosea will patiently listen to all of it and when he's done he’ll offer to kick the other kids’ asses for him, and Arthur’s like lmao but Hosea Means It.

Hosea is also the one the kids go to for help on their homework because Hosea and Dutch have five brain cells between them, and four of them belong to Hosea. Dutch is like “suddenly I don’t remember basic math, time to make shit up” and Hosea is like “I must become an expert on 1820s Chinese history in two days for my beautiful sons”

I have NO idea what either of their jobs are, I wanna say Hosea is a lawyer or smthn but idk, Dutch is probably like......................a used car salesman LMAO...... they clearly make a lot of money (or maybe STOLE SOME) bc I gave them a huge house w/ a pool gjhkdhg

Anyway more about THE KIDS

They go to a school that is a combination middle school and high school, bc that’s what my school was like

Mrs. Grimshaw is the strict and irritable principal with a secret soft spot for kids, Mr. Pearson is the cafeteria cook, Strauss works in the office, I wanna say Rev. Swanson is a weird but friendly janitor or something lmao. Uncle is Dutch & Hosea’s annoying forever-drunk neighbor who everyone barely tolerates fjfjhfh

Micah is The School Bully but like bc this is a cutesy high school au and I can do what I want, he’s not actually like a violent racist or anything he’s just a bad mad sad kid who is a huge dick

Bill is Micah’s Bully Henchman, he’s generally not as much of a dick as Micah is, but he punches whoever Micah asks him to bc they are the closest thing to friends that either of them have

Trelawny is a new student who just moved from another school and he’s that fucking Weird Magician Kid who can’t hold a conversation longer than five seconds without saying “wanna see a magic trick,” tried to do some unimpressive card tricks for the school talent show, unironically wears a cape, etc.... Arthur stood up for him when he was getting pushed around by Micah and Bill so now Arthur has +1 more weird friend

Karen is the Popular Girl who somehow knows everyone, is probably a cheerleader, everyone is either extremely intimidated by her or thinks she’s gonna be a stuck up bitch, but she’s actually just super fucking chill and nice, WILL stab a man for her friends, she won’t hesitate bitch

Tilly is Karen’s bff who was getting bullied by *shakes fist* those dang foreman brothers.... Karen stood up for her and Tilly was like “no don’t u will get hurt!!” and Karen was like “ha... fool... cheerleaders cannot die” and whooped ass with her gymnastics skills and somehow got the foreman brothers expelled. So now Tilly is like “I owe u one (1) Life Debt” but Karen is like “nah it’s chill just come to target w/ me & we’ll call it even.” Tilly is just tryna get shit done and do her damn homework but everybody else is going on adventures and being nuisances so of course Tilly has to go too bc come on....... who do you take her for, some kinda two-bit GEEK? NO WAY

Mary Beth is a quiet nerdy girl who’s always reading or writing and never talks in class or anything. Karen and Tilly became her friends thru sheer brute force, Karen just sat by her one day n was like “sup” and Mary Beth was too shy to ask her to leave. They were surprised to discover Mary Beth is actually pretty nice and funny when you get to know her and also the Biggest Lesbian Alive

Sadie is a BAD BITCH... NOBODY fucks with Sadie, not even Micah, Sadie is the girl who when some dipshit boy spreads a rumor that he had sex with her, she agrees and tells everyone she pegged him and he cried after, she hasn’t given a fuck since 2007. she climbs on the roof to get lost frisbees. one time she got the gym coach to agree to give her an automatic A in the class if she did 100 push ups in 5 minutes. Then she Did That. She might have pulled several muscles in both of her arms but She Did That. Karen, Tilly, and Mary Beth (but mostly Karen) approached her like “damn that was sick” and Sadie was like “yea i know” and then they were friends

I literally don’t know anything about Sean I’m sorry...... maybe he’s a transfer student who becomes friends with John, they play Minecraft together and Sean boobytraps the houses John builds. Sean is the only living human being who understands how redstone works and he uses his powers for evil

Molly is going to a nearby community college and is working at the high school part time as a TA and she is like 19-20 or smthn so the kids all think she’s The Hottest Shit,,,, like they think she’s just the coolest hippest person alive, but also she is Very Attractive so fuckin everybody has a crush on her, most specifically Javier and Mary Beth. She ineptly tries to flirt with Dutch every time he comes to a parent teacher conference bc she’s dummy thicc and thinks it’s friendship goals that Dutch lives with and has adopted children with his Best Bud Hosea

The teacher Molly is TA for is Charles Chatenay, an all-grades art teacher who takes his job WAY too seriously, like dude chill they’re high schoolers. His class is where Arthur met Albert, bc Arthur loves drawing and obviously Albert loves photography. They were both like “wow he’s cute” but were too shy to talk to each other for more than basic pleasantries, until one day Albert’s Big Project was ruined a day or two before he was gonna turn it in, and Arthur helped him fix it.

They’re so sweet on each other it’s unbearable, they’re both Soft Boys so they fuckin blush if they make eye contact...... the most bold either of them get is when Arthur is feeling insecure about his body and Albert gladly tells him how perfect and handsome he is in every way, and he wishes he was half as gorgeous as Arthur is, and Arthur is like (offended) um, excuse me, how dare u insult my beautiful boyfriend in this way?? They both wanna grow beards so while they’re still going thru Changes they excitedly bond over their facial hair......... they run up to each other at school like LOOK AT MY NEW CHIN HAIR and the other one is like WOW!!! GOOD JOB

Javier has a big lovely family who spoil him rotten and tbh love to spoil his friends when they come over too, his parents are in a constant and devastating game of dish-gifting with Dutch & Hosea, Arthur and John have eaten more of Mr. & Mrs. Escuella’s tamales than any other food, neither Dutch nor Hosea are very good cooks but luckily Javier has plenty of aunts and uncles and cousins who are happy to occasionally take one of their unimpressive lasagnas or cakes from a box mix

Lenny’s cool dad in canon is the high school au dad of Charles and Lenny, he and Charles’s mom amicably divorced and he got remarried to Lenny’s mom, who is a Cool Stepmom to Charles. Charles and Lenny go stay with Charles’s mom all the time, in fact she was around so much when they were younger that she practically helped raise them both. maybe she gets a gf and Charles and Lenny have so many moms and are so loved & cherished like they fuCKIN DESERVE

Kieran is the weird horse girl at school, he’s Lenny’s age, they become friends when they’re forced to sit next to each other and they’re both too awkward and shy to say anything until they’re paired up on a project together bc everyone else in the class already paired up and they were the only ones left gjkhfd.... John wants to dislike Kieran bc Lenny is HIS friend now, but Kieran is a sweet lad with a mean dad.... His dad is Colm O’Driscoll, Dutch & Hosea’s other neighbor and Dutch’s sworn enemy

Dutch expects Kieran to be as shitty as his dad, but he is a SWEET BOY, and as soon as they realize his situation, they tell Kieran he can come over whenever he wants and spend the night any time, he doesn’t have to ask or anything, but Kieran is super respectful and always asks permission and always tries to come over when John or Arthur are there so he can go under the pretense of hanging out with them, bc he doesn’t wanna intrude...

Once he came over when Hosea was the only one home and he was like “hi Mr. Matthews are John and Arthur home” and Hosea was like “no sorry they’re out” and Kieran was like “oh... ok sorry I’ll just go then” and Hosea was like “absolutely not” and brought Kieran in and made him snacks and wrapped him in many blankets and watched a kids movie with him until he fell asleep on the couch... when Dutch came home he was like “??? new son ???” and Hosea was like “yea I guess. oops”

When Kieran gets older they help him become an emancipated minor and get a job and his own place (even tho he knows they’d let him stay with them if he wanted) and he changes his last name to his mom’s maiden name Duffy... Colm and Dutch glare at each other over their fences and Colm is like “enjoying stealing my son?” and Dutch is like “my son now” but Colm really doesn’t care bc he’s an asshole... and even tho they don’t legally adopt him, Kieran’s like “I’m more of a Van der Linde than an O’Driscoll” and oops i’m making myself cry again :’)

And yes Abigail does eventually teach John how to play stupid super smash bros. She’s Pro Gamer level of competent at nearly all video games and John has the biggest heart eyes for her, the end thank u for listening

[mysteriouskod]

TW: possible stalking, sexual(?) Harassment, harassment in general, toxic masculinity(? I guess), just.. it's about a creep.

So, I didnt really wanna post this. I really, really didnt, but I'm fighting off an anxiety attack right now.

As you guys may know, I've been with out a job since December 2017. I have only recently decided to go back to work, despite not fully feeling ready. I need money, I have goals, if I could bull my way through work at my worst point, I figured I could do it now.

Abou 2 to 3 weeks ago, when I first started working the night shift, I walked to work as per usual. I love walking. It's my favorite way to prepare for or unwind from something. I went to Tim Hortons, a Canadian Coffee shop that made it's way here in Buffalo, before my shift because I was an hour and a half early. After eating a donut, I back tracked to work cause it's less than a five minute walk. I sit on the bench and smoke a cigarette.

Then he approaches me.

Now, I'm from South Buffalo. It's a little neighborhood pretty much right outside the outer city(so like, the outer outer city. I'm a block or so up from where the city of Buffalo actually starts, I think.) I also went to college inside the city. I'm used to weird people from all walks of life.

But this guy felt different.

I took my head phones out to see what he wanted, assuming it was a cigarette. He was visibly drunk, and high off something. Again, nothing I'm not used to. He hung around for about 15 minutes. He spoke in a way that didnt make sense. HE knew what he was talking about, but it literally made no sense. He leaves, I write it off as nothing.

Until Thursday.

I go out for my break around 10, cause the last cashier wants to go hone early. No problem. I really dont give a shit. Like always, I scan the parking lot. Not a paranoia thing, more like a "am I gonna get in anyone's way/How many customers do we have rn" type deal. I sit on the bench.

As soon as I sit on the bench, he approaches me.

Hes high/drunk again.

He again tries giving me cigarettes, I again try declining. He asks my name. I panic and give him my chosen name, cause no one at work knows that name since I cant have my name tag have that name(i hate it but I'm honestly glad) This way, he goes in asking for a Kinsey, no one will know who hes talking about.

Hes so fucked up he cant even say it right.

He asks my age, I tell him 21 thinking "mayhaps thisll make him leave me alone".

His response: "score! I am too..... just add a few"

Now, the man is clearly 40(well, 39 as I learned later). I have no problem with this. I dont give a shit how old someone is. I'll talk to anyone in normally conversation. I am more attracted to people older than myself. If I click, I click.

But I dont know any one in that age group in their right mind who would respond that way. Sure, I do know people who are older and like younger(LEGAL) people, but the difference is they know how to fucking act and dont ducking harass people so that's not my problem here.

I'm legitimately scared.

He gets a phone call, makes a really weird comment about me. Is talking about me like he actually KNOWS me.

The moment he turns his back and walks the other way I run inside and tell the cashier who then tells our manager on duty.

Fast forward an hour.

He fucking comes in.

Theres 4 to 5 other people at my station cause it's the easy scan and the only thing open for people to cash out.

He doesnt really try talking to me.

I get an opportunity after he leaves to call my manager up to help customers, and let him know the guy came in. Gives me a very firm "if you need me, call me" with that like... I really dont know how to describe it. I know the look cause my guy friends have given it to me before. You know... that like protective "I got your back, I wont let anything happen to you" look. Says he will let the over night manager who will be there for the rest of my shift know.

Fast forward to roughly 1215ish, the last 30 minutes of my shift.

Like three people in my store.

He comes in.

Starts accosting me for lack of a better word. Making no sense.

Trying to buy me food. I politely decline. He gets mad at my excuses(that could have been legitimate) Goes on about how nice I am (IM FUCKING NICE TO EVERYONE) Moves to the other side of my stand podium thingy. Doesnt realize I specifically adjusted my stance to not give him an opening. Continues to try giving me food, that im nice, getting mad I'm rejecting him. I'm desperately trying to get him to leave me alone. Even pointing out I think hes too drunk and needs to go sit down which makes him more angry. I consider telling him about my boyfriend.

Then a Male customer (one of 3 people who came up in the time guy was there, whom I was desperately trying to signal via eye contact that I needed help) says bye to me, and I say bye back. You know, my job.

The RAGE in this man's eyes that I DARE give another man attention was staggering.

Cant tell him I have boyfriend, he may get violent.

He finally decides go go grab MORE beer. I call my manager up.

Manager stands next to me, and when guy gets to a scanner, tells me to go to the back.

I literally have to hold myself back from RUNNING.

My manager calls for the other guy on shift who was cleaning the meat room to have him tell me I can come up. I think he did it on purpose so a) guy wouldnt get my work name and b) guy would know theres another man on shift.

I didnt stop shaking until I went to bed that night.

I bought a knife.

I havent touched a knife in over two years for personal reasons.

The guy only approaches me when I'm alone. When it's dark.

No body tried to fucking help.

I'm scared to go to work now. I'm scared that if I take my break outside, like I always do, he will approach me. I'm afraid that he will see me get out of my moms car (or the vehicle of who ever drives me) and come in.

I am afraid and do not know what to do; I need this job.

[leylakinsx13-blog]

THE TIME IS HERE!!! I know some of you have been patiently waiting for me to update this blog you’re in luck!!

Last night we stayed just outside of Chicago since we were supposed to have freezing rain overnight. We were not risking being stuck at home.

We stayed at the country inn and suites, which was actually really nice. Dad wanted deep dish pizza so we swung by this pizza joint that was super packed. Dad said to forget about that place and to just go to the mall I wanted to go to. (*giddy girl squeeee*)

Get to the wood field mall. Also super packed but alas, we trudged through anyways. When we leave dad says “well, that was just exciting.” Insert all the sarcasm in the world to that comment. Shocking. I know.

Anyways, we leave the mall. And try the same pizza joint except in a different location. STRIKE TWO! This was just a place you order and take pizza to go. No thanks.

So dad had emailed me a restaurant last week or something like that of a restaurant we could go to, third time is a charm, right? We go inside and it’s like a 40 minute wait unless you wanted to eat at the bar.

We got on the table wait list, the bar was full so we just hung out until I sniped a spot at the bar. SUCCESS! I didn’t cancel the table just in case it was not going to be too terribly long. We ordered food at the bar, started eating, finally we get called to a table. We just laughed and carried on with dinner which was delightful. Moretti’s if anyone is curious.

After dinner we headed back to the hotel for the evening and went to bed. We’re seriously exciting people.

7AM Sunday: Flight day!!!

My wonderful alarm goes off at 7. We got up headed over the free breakfast because, well, it’s me. If there’s food, there’s a Leah.

Finish up breakfast, dad has a smoke, we grab our stuff and head to the shuttle. Here’s a good laugh for everyone... I hop in the shuttle van and bounce right onto the seatbelt clamp. Seriously, I think my right asscheek is bruised.

We get to the airport, I’m briefing dad on everything. “Take your coats off, take your belt off, take your shoes off... blah blah blah” dad: “I can only do one thing at a time!!”

We make in through TSA with no incident. However while I’m packing all of our snacks back into my bag, a TSA agent asks if this random tray of chocolates and powdered coffee creamer is mine to which I said no. He then proceeds to ask if I want it. (It’s too early in the morning for me so I’m just standing there dumbfounded for a moment) I say “uhh.. no? I’ve watched too much Drugs Inc. on Netflix. I have no idea what could be in there! And I’m not trying to get busted for something!” He responds back telling me I’m a smart girl.

Uhhh? Thanks? Not my coke and crack rocks, I’m just trying to get to my vacation.

Finally we are making our way to our gate to hand out. Annnnd of course there’s one of those little electric walkways on the floor.

Let’s just say dad took full advantage of poking along on that, laughing at his snailing speed while I’m standing at the end waiting for him.

We’re at our gate patiently waiting dad is asking about our plane and commenting on other planes while seeming highly intrigued. I was fascinated. Dad seeming to be interested in something?!

Finally it’s time to board up and continue onwards with the journey. We have our passes scanned and then we were standing on the jet bridge for what felt like an eternity freezing to death. We finally get to our seats and dad sits down looking disapprovingly at me and the seats. I just laughed because I knew before we left he’d hate the seats. I chose frontier because they are the home of low fares done right! Or something of that nature...

But anyways, we’re packed in like little sardines riding with Cloe the deer fawn. The entire plane is rocking back and fourth while we’re just sitting there waiting for everyone to get in. Literally the most nauseating feeling was taking over me from the shaking. Dads response? “Imagine taking a cruise and feeling that the whole time!” Thanks dad... I’m feeling much better after that.. hahaha.

Time for take off. FINALLY!!!!

Talk about terrifying... I think I peed a little. That’s no joke. The wind was AWFUL!!! I didn’t think we were going to make it into the air. I was thinking to myself, “great, now we’re going to lose a wing and bounce off the runway.”

Me to dad: “the wing is probably going to snap off and we’ll all die.” Dad: “naw, I’m too ornery to die.” Okay dad, whatever you say.

The flight was pretty smooth, dad and I had some snacks and an in flight nap up until the landing. She was pretty rough too but we made it into Jacksonville just in time for it to finish raining!

We picked up our rental car which was hellish. They were packed and had no cars. We waited about 20 minutes before dad started getting crabby that we were going to waste our entire day waiting for a car. So I told the lady that we needed a car ASAP because we had reservations, we didn’t, but we got a car. NO TIME FOR A CRABBY DAD OR IT WILL BE A LONG TWO DAYS!!

I set up the GPS to head to lunch and of course dad immediately realized we weren’t headed the right direction... dad: “I thought this joint was between Jacksonville and savannah?!” Me: “no, I told you it was in Jacksonville.”

Thankfully any crisis was averted there due to the fact this restaurant has 4.7 stars with over 2k reviews. It was called safe harbor and it was delish!

Dad knew before we even got there that he wanted a grilled shrimp basket. As for me, I had no clue, but I went to the classic fried fish. We also decided to split an order of gator tail.

I’m weak. I love gator. I thought for sure dad would be hesitant but he was actually the one who asked if I was wanting to try it from there. A restaurant with locally sourced/caught seafood? Of course I’m eating gator.

No regrets. The gator was AMAZING! Dad said it was “really good” and for any of you who know my dad, that’s a rare thing to hear. He did also enjoy his shrimp basket. So I dodged a bullet and was able to wipe the sweat from my brow this go.

After we finished up lunch we took a quick walk through the area before having to sit for another two hours to get to Savannah!

It’s a straight shot from Jacksonville to Savannah on I95 so we’re about mid way there when all of a sudden dad yells “DID YOU SHIT!?!” Guys, I seriously about died laughing. It hadn’t quite hit me and I was like “oh my god! No! DID YOU!?!” We’re both dying in the car from this putrid stench that came out of nowhere and assaulted your nostrils like they owed some serious cash. Dad: “smells like Nekoosa in the middle of August! NASTY!!”

I’m laughing just thinking about it. It was disgusting but gold. Thanks for automatically assuming it was me, dad.

We are finally approaching one of the joints I put on my list to stop at with dad. It was called “peach world”. Dad likes peaches so it seemed appropriate. It was just a small roadside shack full of peach related items. Salsa, jelly, tea, brittle, you name it I’m sure it was in there.

Dad found us some peach bread and the lady gave us a sample of a peach cider slushie. Needless to say we ended up with two peach slushies.

We paid and went back to the car and dad says “this better be the best damn peach bread I’ve ever had for that kind of money!!!” Me: “then why’d you buy it? There was a sign on the table with a price.” Dad: “WHAT! I DIDNT SEE IT! HOW MUCH WAS IT!?!” Me: “11.99”

I couldn’t help but laugh. It is good bread, but definitely not quite worth that price.

We finally finished up our trip and got to our Air BnB here in Savannah, and we’ve just been hanging out here until tomorrow morning since it’s Sunday in the south.

Hopefully tomorrow’s excursions will be a little more exciting.

[powercouragewisdom]

I came across this, and it has to be shared: Everyone believing it was “10 years ago” and it’s so far in the past:

Everyone else:

2 & 3 months after beginning work for Marvel, these were posted, 2nd one almost 5 years ago. 

Bonus from the same year:

Notice how none of the tweets on this post indicate in tone or text that they are a “joke”

I took up very little space with others’ stupidity at the top, but before we proceed, let’s get some things straight: 1. “He didnt mean it” You don’t know what he meant, you don’t know him personally, and he meant them is more likely which is why he left them up until 6 days ago.  2. “He didnt hurt anyone” addressed far below. 3. “10 years ago” Last tweet was 6 years ago, & Happened nonstop between ages 41-46 over 5 years..about how long its been since his last visible pedophile thought. Along with jokes about rape, lgbt, 9/11, etc 4. “He apologized for this in 2012″ No. He never apologized for these tweets in 2012. He apologized for anti-lgbt and sexist comments. *btw The apology here was made before the 2 pedo tweets above* He went from bigot to abuse poster in record time 5. “But GotG cast is supporting him” and it’s not hard to understand why. These are people that, most of them, were fairly obscure as actors, not prominent or at the forefront of everyone’s minds before gotg (dave, pom, karen, chris p). These people were nothing fame-wise. James gave them an opportunity, a platform to be pushed forward on with its success. They owe him their notariety and relevance, and they are thankful and grateful for the support and help he gave, leading them and making them feel great while working. Of course they are going to defend him! They only know him as this, instead of other things he may be. Don’t put more on it than there is, and simply understand where they’re coming from WhatNoOneSaidAboutGOTGcast: it is very unwise and stupid if you speak out against and don’t support a director, because it can lead to you not getting jobs as an actor, not being hired and other directors/execs thinking you won’t support them if something hits the fan. There’s a reason Zoe’s, Pom’s, Chris’ and Karen’s tweets are very vague and general.. Now, here’s what the rest of us know:

*coughjeremyrennercoughrdjcoughcountlessothercelebritiesyouattackcough*

- *6 years ago Remember to pay attention to how none of the tweets you will see in this post indicate in tone or text that they are a “joke”

and he was so scared and in a rush to “clean up” everything, he slipped:

bottom line:

he “apologized” because he [had to]. if Kevin Spacey hadn’t messed up his “apology” you would still be some of his fans ”You don’t know that he hurt anyone!!” His tweets have hurt many, and you don’t know that he hasn’t touched children. One of his director friends (Huston Huddleston) is convicted of possession of child pornography and contacting a minor with the intent to commit a felony. He sent James a vid of child porn and James responded saying he masturbated to it, on the same blog with the monkey thing screencapped far below. An apology to perpetrators is like toilet paper; used to keep sh** off you, until forgotten residue of the next dump threatens to make you stink.

Did you see what he said? The only reason they’re “old” is because that’s when guardians started. Someone who’s been comfortable putting this garbage in the atmosphere over 5 years would not see a reason to stop unless they had to. in a moment of clarity and sanity, as someone pointed out earlier, he even said he won’t say he’s better:

that’s a big middle finger to everyone claiming he “grew” from this the only truth you have, literally the only truth you know, is that he didn’t post these on twitter after 2012. No proof that he grew because you don’t know him personally. growing implies elevation and improvement, a more desired version of the previous, whereas this implies “I’m more of a tulip now than a lilac” stop taking a weak string of apology and holding on to it for proof that he is or isn’t something so you can feel good about a movie!  he literally just said he was different, could be he just kept existing and accumulating, rolling around the universe until something else grabbed his attention instead of an abuse fantasy lifestyle that inspired over 10,000 tweets and God knows what else it can mean simply taking the thoughts to another medium/platform.

moving right along,

Nambla-

and

enjoy-

I dare you to continue to think someone like this who did over 10,000 of these in his 40s , which only disappeared after guardians started, should continue being comfortable in hollywood and have the access and connections that come with that, including to people’s children. who are auditioning or born into the industry  and

This is literally jailtime.

a lovely excerpt from his deleted blog:

theres much more lest we not forget:

karma is my favorite kind of tea™ So:

read this carefully:

As for another celebrity on his team:

gotta wonder why.

Due to the length and content It can be concluded that this person has a very off mind. Anyone comfortable thinking about let alone writing, this, there has to be something wrong. If he were posting tweets or videos about animal abuse fantasies re-read my previous two sentences and see if they fit you would say the same thing and it is literally the same thing. talking about animal abuse fantasies is literally the same thing. talking about child abuse is the same as talking about animal abuse for years enjoying child abuse content is the same as enjoying animal abuse content child abuse and animal abuse are in the same category i’m so sorry for your loss of contentment and comfort in thinking otherwise. Disney will never rehire this person and it’s laughable that people think they will. The ignorance, dismissal and disrespect he has shown toward people who have dealt with the serious content he made fun of of is something no one should take lightly, no one cares if it was 20 years ago. Some things #SPOILERALERT are more horrible than others (RDJ’s struggle with drugs and alcohol is not comparable, sorry kids B)  ^This honestly is why Johnny D is, and John Lass was still employed by them; he resigned last I saw.  Johnny has been most people’s favorite public figure for decades and has been seen volunteering and working with disadvantaged and disabled children for years, instead of anything suggesting abusing them. Even with alcohol and beating on his ex wife, those are still seen as not as abhorrent as hurting people/children who’ve faced trauma. Because of who he is and human nature understanding some things as worse, it is what it is. John Lasseter, same thing. I didnt see allegations or issues relating to kids and harming them, but he harassed and abused women and other people. With this, it still isn’t him harming, or producing anything that would harm children. More to get straight: "Disney had problematic stuff" the people responsible for those racist cartoons don't exist anymore and aren't working for disney. NEXT “Seth MacFarlane and MatT & TrEy” The difference is painfully clear: The creators of family guy and south park present inappropriate characters and situations that make fun of the perpetrators and show how ridiculous they are, instead of the victims, other characters chiming in. It really is that simple, I have seen it all. It is clear in the delivery of content and the context that’s shown. If they didn’t these juggernaut shows accessed by most of America would have been canceled so fast you would have whiplash. If you want to complain about something in feeble support, use Robot Chicken, a show featuring CSA, animal abuse, rape and Jesus’ death on the cross as a gameshow. A show featured on a network that’s supporting another guy being persecuted for abuse media...hm

Honestly at this point most of the people defending him are likely either pedophiles themselves or know people who are. if he was a poc or a woman, let’s not bother with what this would look like. no one would be crying real tears about how they should get their job back.

this is not only terrible, but dangerous. rape culture is a thing bc first it was funny normalize the joke, normalize the thing. dismissing as just a joke, is allowing everyone to think its ok/naturalizing it & if somethings wrong, dismiss it as a joke all you can do is hope that he has actually stopped and that its genuine since people love animals more than people these days, if he posted 10,000 videos/tweets about animal torture and abuse, how would you feel? he didn't actually torture them.. have a nice day

[xxiodinexx]

why did you get chatbanned duder?

I had a Cease and Desist with Geralt the o-o fuck, and apparently my joking with other people about the o-o was violating the damn thing. Heres my favorite tidbits when I reported them for being rude last night where it got turned on me:

“As for your chat suspension, you knew that you had a cease-and-desist against Geralt. We warned you that any interactions with them would result in both of you being punished. “

"when did kovan become a mod 2018-08-19 21:14:19 Geralt Of Rivia""When her app got accepted 2018-08-19 21:14:32 Sansa""fuckin idiot 2018-08-19 21:14:50 Nova"

"Yall love idiots? I love idiots too. 2018-08-19 21:16:17 Nova"

"Rocket you made yoru point now leave lone 2018-08-19 21:18:34 Geralt Of Rivia""Logic, out the window, as well as english it seems. 2018-08-19 21:19:00 Nova" 

"im just here to make my usual asshole snark comments 2018-08-19 21:20:44 Nova"

"hmm I don't know i was the bi towel stealing monster for a while o_o 2018-08-19 21:21:35 Geralt Of Rivia""and no one took offense to that XD 2018-08-19 21:21:40 Geralt Of Rivia""Because it was dumb 2018-08-19 21:22:12 Nova"

"i can point out like 2 people who are real fuckin sensitive here 2018-08-19 21:25:07 Nova""well who is it nova 2018-08-19 21:25:58 Rocket Pangolin""cant say rocket 2018-08-19 21:26:18 Nova""otherwise theyd get offended and start their bitchbaby crying o-o 2018-08-19 21:26:33 Nova"

"o-o o-o o-o o-o o-o 2018-08-19 21:29:54 Nova"

“It's more than obvious to players that are regularly in chat that the repeated "o-o" comments are meant to bait and mock Geralt into responding or being offended. It's also obvious that many of your comments, while they are not directed straight to Geralt, are pointed towards them. This behaviour fell under our cease-and-desist, and they also count not only as disrespect, but targeting.”

My favorite parts from the night where when Geralt blamed their depression on LD, and kept using it as a scapegoat. Guess the admin that handled the reporting didnt catch it when I said “Yall like goats? cause there seems to be a lot of escapedgoats here tonight.”

TL;DR: Got chatbanned for targeting a scapegoat using idiot that I was told was going to be punished but never did. Admins and Mods are biased. You’ll see a lot of “Nova said Blocking is for Pussies so she got chatbanned” because that is something I said before Chat got taken down.

:) see you in a month, maybe.

[hell0mega]

probably meaningless rant lol

my sister has been having a really hard time recently. a local survivors/abuse callout group with 15k followers recently outed a serial abuser (like 40+ women) and it even ended up on the news. she doesn't know the guy but she's posted about the men she's had troubles with in the past on there. but the page suddenly shut down and even deactivated and no one knew what was going on, and this recent guy seemed scary enough to maybe do something to them, so she was worried.

turns out it was internal and a woman that got involved in the organization was an abuser herself. not sexually but in a power and manipulation kind of way. so to save themselves the creator just shut it down. it's been a tumultuous time for online activism, which she says she's had a lot of fun doing, but i don't know if what she experiences should be considered "fun"

she fell headfirst into sexual activism and positivity and Instagram psychology where everything is a "trauma response." she's gone through a lot of trials and tribulations in her life (she's 10 years older than me so completely different world) and the experiences she shared were in fact traumatic.

but it's made me think about how i deal with things from my past, and... I've definitely had traumatic experiences and both my past relationships were toxic as hell. i have an inate aversion to sex on top of my asexuality because of how they treated me. I'm sex positive and I'm theory like sex but initiating makes me scared. you can argue that i was lucky that they didnt push harder, or that i was strong in not giving into their tactics, but it still harmed me. and ive had to deal with it and realize these things still effected me and have talked to my bf about it at length (not exactly many details, but the kinds of things they did or SAID and how it effected me)

but i think im just at a point where i, at the very least CURRENTLY, dont feel burdened by my past. and maybe that's just because im so separated from it, having been quarantined for almost a year now and focusing on school and my home life. i think it helps that my bf is so supportive and is nothing like my exes, while my sister's even-longer bf is having trouble being there for her, which im mad about.

she described something that's been happening a lot lately and it was textbook dissociation. unlike me, who was in a near-constant state of it for a couple months, hers comes and goes, which i almost feel might be worse. it's like a switch turns on and off in her head, usually in response to something she reads, thinks, or does. and i do empathize with her there as i am also one to dissociate as a stress response (not recently, but i did go through a long period like i said) so i was able to give her some good explanations as to what was happening and advice on how to get out of it.

but she also is asking me advice about how to deal with PEOPLE. girl you're the adult here, whomst has had many many jobs and actually likes (or liked, rather, considering the pandemic) traveling and going out to have fun and socialize. i literally had to tell her "i dont really talk to people" when she asked for my input on something. and i just feel so disconnected to that problem and that mindset of WANTING to reach out, wanting to engage in things. and i don't know why.

I'm literally a communications major and i do LIKE to talk to people. i love talking to people and communicating... in real life. the more i think about it the more i realize how much i fucking hate trying to communicate over text. and i don't mean with friends, but it seems like whenever i try to comment on something, or respond to someone, or say just anything, there's someone that takes it out of context, or just doesn't have fucking reading comprehension or something despite me if anything over explaining my point. i hate social media (which is why that WON'T be my degree concentration, I'd rather die) despite me consuming it so often. but i just feel like there's no critical thinking. people need to say what they think the second they think it.

and this might make me sound like a boomer or something but boomers are the worst at this. it might make me soundhippie dippie that I'd rather talk to someone in real life than on Twitter or some shit.

this is where it stopped me from typing lol. as if anyone is reading this. anyway i guess I'm just... weirdly numb right now. and not in a no-feelings depressed kind of way, but in an... unburdened way. like i empathize and I'm not rolling my eyes out being apathetic towards any heartbreak happening that i read. but when i reflect on some things from my past that i feel like i probably havent healed from... i dont feel... anything?

is that my brain protecting itself? do i have enough on my mind already that my brain is making me not dwell on the past? is that a thing? i just feel... nothing when i think about bad past stuff, right now, to the point where i stupidly wonder why people "let" their past effect them. as if my past hasn't ever effected me or changed who i am ultimately.

I'm also weirdly disconnected from my past self. i don't have a lot of memories of my past that i can recall without something to remind me. i don't know how i acted, i don't know how i said things. then i see videos or pictures and I'm... still me. i act the same, talk the same, think the same. my hair is different but I've had the same face my whole life. is this a coping mechanism? I've always been like this

i don't know where i was really going with this. i guess I'm just dealing with a lot, including my sister's emotional issues, which she's never leaned on me before with until now. she called me 3 times in one day... we talked for 2 hours today. i replied to her innocuous message on ig and she called me cuz she saw that i was active on my phone.

I'm fine with it now but I'm worried I'll get to the point where I'll not open her (unrelated) messages or avoid putting stuff in my ig stories in order for get to not know I'm online/not busy. I'm not near that point yet but I've had to do that in regards to other people in the past and it's such a sucky feeling. I've never had to do it to family and i hope i don't feel that way. i hope she feels better from therapy for both our sakes

i don't think I'm gonna read this over so sorry for any spelling mistakes as I'm on my phone and autocorrect be playin