#now i Too can remind myself to be a good person with What Would Vash Do?

[orcelito]

Got my W.W.V.D. bracelets 😊😊😊 from @revenantghost !

Already wearing the black one for Average Use and I am lovinggg it

[millionsknives]

Hello Bryn so I started following you for your Trigun art (love love love ‘em) but your spring rolls pic just gave me so much personal and Trigun feels… sorry I’m about to ramble.

So my good friend is Viet and we lived together during Covid lockdown. We made and ate SO MUCH Viet food. It really is a whole event. A participatory art. I live alone now and I miss eating as a communal ritual.

Which reminds me of that Stampede scene where Vash finally started eating again “I deserve to eat, right?” They were eating together too—all of them, including the three random dudes that were on the sideline. There’s just something so natural and comforting about sharing meals; it’s making me kind of sad because Vash often had to eat alone (ex. when he first came to ship 3 and when he roamed around the desert). Vash was hungry for a family/community and now I can see that being one of the points of episode 4.

Happy eating together!!!

i feel the same way 😭😭 sharing food isn’t just about food, it’s healing. to be welcomed in, to be looked after, to participate together in the creation and consumption of what makes us so human

my roommate of four years was viet (i can’t even call her a roommate, we were so much more than that, she’s family) and she helped teach me how to cook and for us food wasn’t just what we ate, it was what we did. it was how we loved.

i’ve never seen someone eat so much in my life, countless shared meals, whether it was just the two of us or we were cooking for thirty other people, howl’s-moving-castle-breakfasts on weekends, hurried dinner leftovers scarfed down in the car while i drove the 55, hours-long hot pot feasts until we’re sweating and stuffed, wicked cold ice cream eaten on the curb downtown as midnight approaches, entire rainy mondays spent making phở, sandwiches with too much maggi seasoning packed in paper bags for hikes, inviting the boys over to gorge on wafer-thin bánh xèo, she’d chop tomatoes for my bruschetta because the smell of them made me sick and i would juice lemons for her when her hands were chapped and bleeding. and i’ve never had an easy relationship with food but something about lyss made eating feel so simple and right.

since she moved away and i eventually moved too i don’t have that same community anymore and i’ve struggled to eat well since losing it. i didn’t know what i had until it was gone. she never forced me to eat or chided me for not eating, she would just make really good food and share it with me. and i would eat it. i could eat it. eating was easier when she was around. so making dinner tonight was like a ritual, putting on the apron she gave me and making spring rolls for the first time in months and accidentally pouring out too much fish sauce just like she would do; and even though i don’t get to share spring rolls with her anymore, the time and the food that we shared together has changed me. and it’s okay. it’s easier to let myself eat and laugh when i can be the one to provide a meal for the people that i am with now, even if they’re not the people who make it easy, so for now i will do just that and maybe someday again i will be able to cook and eat with someone who makes it unburdensome.

[bladesappreciationweek]

Resources for Day Five: The Realm of Light

From Prince Aerin to Farin Starfury, the Realm of Light is full of inspiration! Looking for something off the beaten path? You could illustrate some of the old Myths, make an edit of a mythical beastie, or tell of a story about that overly-attractive side-character we were blessed with for a single scene. The possibilities are endless! 

Assembled Transparents | Lore 

Quotes: 

”There’s so much wonder and beautiful in the realms, [MC]. It’d be a shame if you didn’t experience it all.” Mal

Characters: 

Kade | Threep | The Royal Family | The Starfurys | Kaya | Ellara and Xiaus | Skull Crusher & Ventra Tal Kaelen | Mermaid | Voxper

signal boosts appreciated

Prince Aerin:

“It’s not just that he’s the oldest. He’s also the favorite. Handsome, bold, outgoing...a great hunter and warrior...nothing like me. 

“At least i have my books. I love reading of all the realms, even if I rarely get a chance to visit them.”

“Is it really so hard to believe? My reflexes are well-honed after a life with him as my brother.”

“I’ve learned how to defend myself...I just wish I’d started defending others sooner.”

“I’ve already accepted my place. And it’s in my brothers shadow.”

“The scholars of White Tower say that once something is lost, it cannot be restored. Once something’s corrupted, it’s impossible to bring it back to the Light.”

“You know, this is all extremely un-princely of me.”

“it’s silly but I used to believe there must be some kind of magic that could make my brother like me, or my parents notice me.”

“I fear there are more trials to come. For all of us...”

“Dearest brother, may I suggest paying the terrifying orc mercenary what she’s owed?”

“Until the stars align for us again...”

“As far as princes go, you’re not half bad.” Mal

Threep

“Every day my wisdom is valued less and less around here.”

“It’s true, we’re pampered little things.”

“I am quite a gift, aren’t I?”

“May I remind you that I am a nesper, imbued with nearly two millenia of wisdom, from a far more glorious age than you can even imagine?”

“Offerings of food are always acceptable. Elven cream cakes and honey-wine, perhaps?

“I’m not a prude. I simply don’t understand why you people must burden the mating process with all that messy...kissing and such.”

“I somehow imagined nespers would be more...majestic.” Tyril

“Fine, but when you wake up in the middle of the night and find the adorable cat-bat gnawing on your face, don’t come crying to me.” Mal

“Wait, ‘Exalted One’? The cat?” Imtura

Adrina Starfury:

“I’m this one’s little sister. Though he likes to pretend he’s an old child.”

[To Duchess Xenia] “We are nothing like you!” 

“It was Adrina who attacked Duchess Xenia when she had us all under her spell. It was Adrina who saved us all. She is the future of House Starfury.” Tyril

“I swear, if you’re more excited about the nesper than me...” Tyril

Lord Valir Starfury

“My son. I thought you were dead. We all did. That you’d been overcome with the same and...and...”

“It’s been so long since I’ve seen both my children smiling at the meal table.”

“Adrina, you are a worthy heir to my house.” 

Farin Starfury:

“You cannot trust anyone outside our house, son of my blood. Did you not learn that at your father’s knee?”

“You cannot trust in friendship, nor love, nor vows of loyalty, only to the strength of our house and our blood.”

“The Lords of Starfury do not flee. You cannot show cowardice before the other houses.”

“[MC] is right, honored ancestor. It is my friendships, my love for my friends that will let me restore our house. Not posturing and competition.” Tyril

Kaya Duskraven: 

“She was humble, funny, compassionate. She cared deeply for those in need, and always kept my ego in check. She helped me see how to be a better person. She opened my eyes to the world.” Tyril

“We shared great Kilvali, emotional connection. Our souls sang together.” Tyril “I think what kit’s asking is if you two...you know...did the thing.” Mal

“Kaya Duskraven was a kind, caring, and compassionate friend! And you’re not worth the earth she stood on!” Tyril

“Kaya Duskraven was the bravest, cleverest, noblest elf I have ever met. She abhorred injustice and fought for knowledge and understanding. She taught me so much. To honor our past as elves but to also challenge it. To right the wrongs of our forebears. She gave her life trying to under the harm done by the Shadow Court.” Tyril

“We miss you greatly, Kaya. May you walk among the stars.” Tyril

King Arland:

Prince Baldur:

“I’m something of a collector of exotic beasts, you see...”

“And I yearn for the swooning damsels who will flock to my palace to hear my heroic tale of slaying the drakna queen.”

“All his life, Baldur’s been told he’s destined for the crown. He acts as though he’s invincible...because he is.” Aerin

“I just wish he would change. Open his eyes to the world. Set aside some of his pride...be a good brother.” Aerin

“In case you haven’t noticed, he isn’t the brightest.” Aerin

Ellara:

“Looked like you could use a hand, my love.”

“The shadow forces are many, but they are weak.”

King Xiaus: 

[Ellara asks what to do] “We fight. We die. And we pray that one day, a hero will rise to avenge us.”

Mermaid:

“You’re not...going to lure me to my watery death or anything are you?” asks MC.

Scholar Vash:

“Save your energy, Priestess. These are no mortal wounds. The rot of darkness has infected me.”

Skullcrusher:

“[When you stare] Lookin’s free kid, but everything else will cost ya.” 

“I said no re-matches.”

Ventra Tal Kaelen:

“I have an entire army at my command. I say the word, and they bring me the sun itself. What I need is an heir. Someone reliable. Someone i can trust to carry on my legacy.”

“She’s too busy focusing on whether I’m a suitable princess to see what my true talents are.” Imtura

‘To be honest, I’ve always hoped that if I run long enough, or far enough away, she might give up on me...” Imtura

Voxper: 

“By the laws of the old pact, forged between man and beast, you have played with me. I now owe you a boom.”

[severalspoons]

Long Rambling Trigun Meta Discussion 2

I *hate* the reply function in Tumblr. As far as I’m concerned, it doesn’t function. It doesn’t even open up a findable page so I can respond, and I can’t directly answer the reply. That’s why I reblog.

So, here’s the next best thing:

tiggymalvern

I don't recall anything like that fic you mention from either canon. It's a lovely idea, if only I could imagine Vash and Knives stopping arguing with each other for long enough to do it.

This fic I’m remembering was surprisingly hard to find, and now I’m wondering if it’s from FF.net rather than AO3. Will share once I find it!

The twins argue while doing it, IIRC, and have very different approaches. Luckily for the humans, in this fic the engineer likes the plant and takes care of it well, given how little is actually known about how to do so post-crash. Even so, Knives almost kills the engineer, but Vash stops him and leaves behind a little journal full of advice and encouragement. 

IMO, I feel like this is something Vash would be motivated to do more than Knives:

-- to repair his relationship with Knives

-- because he feels responsible for the people Rem saved

-- because he wants the bulb plants to be safe and happy

(listed in the order I thought of them)

But Knives would see this as slight progress towards Vash seeing things his way, so he’d go with it. What do you think?

tiggymalvern

I've never been entirely clear on the manga ending myself, and I think Nightow left it somewhat ambiguous deliberately. Vash and Knives are fighting, and then the earth forces attack them both, Livia intevenes and Vash and Knives fly off and

six months later we find Vash in hiding with the people who saved him, because Knives convinced them to, and then Knives plants an apple tree to help feed the peopl looking after Vash, and then he vanishes...

I assume he chose not to stay with humans and just went off somewhere, but it's left open

Interesting! Yeah, I got the sense it was supposed to be deliberately ambiguous, too. 

Many people say that Knives died giving his last energy to save Vash, to the point where I thought that was canon. 

No matter what happened with Knives and the tree, I have questions. If Knives planted the tree before dying or disappearing or whatever, I’d want to know where he got the apple seeds, and if providing the energy to make that tree survive on Gunsmoke killed him. If he turned into a tree (which I thought was the canon, but maybe not?), how? I can see why you didn’t interpret Knives as turning into a tree.

All I know for sure is, if Knives were dying, he’d want to do it on his own terms. Ideally in a way that would express his point and make an impression on Vash. I was going to say that creating a tree doesn’t seem like Knives’ style, but then I thought about the apple tree scenes in the anime. However that tree came to be, Vash would most likely associate it with happier times on the ship. Maybe he’d be fucked up enough to see it as a gesture of love. 

Maybe it was the closest thing to a gesture of love someone as manipulative and self-absorbed as Knives could manage...

tiggymalvern  Knives really is a person with no middle ground. When he believed Rem's teachings, he believed them wholeheartedly, that everything would turn out fine and people just needed to be given a chance. When he rejected those teachings and decided it was all just rubbish, he went maximum speed to the other extreme. Reject ALL humans, not just the individuals who had proven that they suck. And reject as in eradicate, not just avoid... 

I love Knives’ all-or-nothing way of being. Maybe because I know and love so many people with a little streak of that. And it’s so believable. Reminds me of a quote I read somewhere about how a misanthrope is a disillusioned idealist.

Knives thinks in utilitarian terms (”the greatest good for the greatest number with the least possible sacrifice”) as a kid for the few short scenes before he turns evil. He also seems to think in terms of groups rather than individuals (”humans,” “spiders,” “butterflies”). It saves him the grief Vash goes through at coming to know and lose so many people, but it also helps him justify a racist ideology. I love that about him, actually. If I were to write a Knives redemption fic, a key arc would be helping him learn to see others as individuals. I have a few paragraphs of something like that written...

Kids definitely need wonder and to see the beauty in the world, but it's also a good idea to mention the possibility of weird strangers offering candy that are best avoided. For these bizarre new non-human children, those warnings would have been extra pertinent, and maybe would have reduced the shock of what came after. Knives is definitely more mature than Vash in those flashbacks. Like you say, he wants to discuss issues with Vash, and Vash just parrots Rem. 

Agree.

I have a theory. Earth, in Trigunverse, seems a lot like our world, only worse.

I’ve seen a lot of people’s sense of wonder, beauty, fun, and curiosity squished. I was the weirdo in preschool, among other four year olds, for being too much like that. Maybe on Trigun Earth, a bleak place to begin with, that’s the norm. (And destroying people’s wonder/curiosity/etc. leads to depression and the ennui of modern life, but that’s another essay).

Some people, like those who run Waldorf schools, overreact by going to the opposite extreme. The worst, most ideologically rigid ones, deliberately wait to teach kids to read so they can explore the world unmediated by words a little longer. (And will even discourage kids who learn to read early, grr). Waldorf philosophy assumes young kids are basically sensing, feeling, and imagining beings, rather than thinking ones. 

I get the sense that Rem is one of these sorts. She was squashed and made to feel worthless for the way she saw the world. Maybe that’s part of the reason she was so depressed and needed Alex’s help. She’s raising the twins the way she wished she had been raised.

That sort of parenting wasn’t appropriate for a plant, of course. But no one had raised independent plants to adulthood before. No one knew what was appropriate. No one knew how to teach them about danger (or how not to). 

Growing up as a neurodivergent person in the Dark Ages, the only kid with allergies and sensory processing problems, etc., I understand all too well how badly things can go when even the most loving parents just don’t know what to do, and can’t find helpful information anywhere. Where helpful information isn’t just hard to find, but it doesn’t exist yet. 

So as critical as I’m being of Rem, I sympathize with her. She really didn’t have much to go on but her own knowledge and experience, and she bravely did the best she could.

Vash isn't thinking for himself yet, but he's a kid, so that's allowable. It does make it harder for Knives, though, who feels he has to be responsible for them both. 

You know, Knives does feel responsible for them both, and I hadn’t thought much about it and about the implications of that. No wonder he was so frustrated and furious. There’s definitely a sense of “something is deeply unfair and wrong” for a child trying to raise not only themselves, but their younger sibling(s).  Perhaps that’s part of the reason I saw Knives as caring about Vash, in his toxic, screwed up way. 

Plant biology is MASSIVELY confusing, and the more you try to piece it together, the more your head hurts LOL. But I think that's almost the point? ...Leaving the readers struggling to figure out the plants is the human perspective.

What do you think about the anime being so much from a human pov, especially considering that the most important characters in it are not?

Wolfwood is the support Vash needs to learn to control his plant powers among other things, the powers that have terrified Vash for so long that he ignored them. But Wolfwood isn't scared of them - or rather, he is, but not scared enough to abandon Vash because of them. He knows all about Vash, he knows all about July and the hole in the moon, he's seen Vash transform into some weird crazy thing with feathers, and Wolfwood still stays. Wolfwood lets Vash know that Vash's mistakes can be forgiven, and Vash is still a worthwhile person despite them. And because Wolfwood believes it, Vash can start to believe it. 

Between how well you put this and the dynamic itself, I’m...blown away and don’t know what to say. 

– “Vash, take care of Knives.” This breaks my heart because so far … he hasn’t. First he follows Knives around. Then abandons him. Then attacks him. I really do think Vash was trying. He followed Knives around for so long while being so angry with him for what he'd done, and yes, part of that was because he didn't want to be alone himself, but part of it was him trying to follow Rem's advice. 

Yeah, true, he did try at first. I undervalued it because by the time the series starts, that was far into the past and Vash probably doesn’t even remember it, but still.

In the manga, Rem specifically says, 'Vash, don't leave Knives alone,' because I think she recognises that Knives is prone to extremes and needs a balance. 

See, that instruction makes so much more sense. And I think the plants would have agreed. (Well, of course they would. They’re a collective consciousness, after all).

Rem probably also knew it’s bad for anyone’s health or sanity to be alone, and an emotionally unstable twin plant even more so. Knives would be in a solitary confinement of his own making.

Vash tried and tried to get Knives to change; he spent so much effort trying to explain why genocide wasn't the answer. But Vash failed, and eventually he recognised that he was always going to fail. So he left Knives, because he needed a life that wasn't that failure. He needed to do something to compensate for Knives. He took upon himself the responsibility of not only protecting the humans from Knives, but protecting the humans from the worst in themselves, which Knives' actions brought to the surface. And that is one hell of a lot to take on, and not a recipe for a happy life.

Yeah, that’s...a heroic life, but not a happy one. In a way, it seems almost as doomed as trying to change Knives. 

[roguetatertot]

I’ve been playing Stardew Valley lately, and I’ve come to romance all bachelors and bachelorettes in the game. But I can’t decide who I want to marry!!!

My initial plan was to marry Leah, but now that I’ve seen all the candidates’ 10 heart events, I’m in a quandary. I need to break it down for my sanity.

The Bachelors:

Alex

I avoided him at first, seeing as how he was into Haley. I’m not a fan of the jock attitude, and I’m fairly sure the dude’s never read a book in his life before, but I mean.....he’s pretty damn cute. But I feel like he’s still in high school, and me being in my thirties, I feel kinda creepy if I were to choose him.

Elliot

The fact that his hair is prettier than mine was the first turn-off. He struck me as pompous at first, up until the Moonlight Jellies came and he conveyed his dismay over how humans treat the oceans poorly. I was like “OKAY there’s more to him than his hair.” The fact that he’s a writer actually turned me off, but his dedication to his craft is commendable. He’s studious, and hey, he can play piano! Not only that, but the dude actually fixed up a rowboat just to take me out on an ocean date! That’s more than any real man has ever done for me lol

Dr Harvey

SWIPE LEFT ON THAT MUSTACHE. But swipe right on his sweet and caring nature. He’s got his shit together, being a doctor and having his aircraft hobbies. He’s a little dorky, and despite his fear of heights, he hitched up his pants and took me out on a hot air balloon ride (which is something I’ve always wanted to do IRL). But I just can’t get past his sprite!! I really don’t like the way it looks. I mean....LOOK AT IT.

Sam

I can’t say that I’m too into the Super Saiyan look. 15-year-old me would’ve loved the Vash-the-Stampede-esque hair, but 34-year-old me doesn’t exactly dig the skateboarding, “I’m in a band”, still-living-with-my-parents-and-kid-brother vibe. The dude had me sneak in through his window and hide in his bed when his mother came into the room for Yoba’s sake! I’m looking for a spouse, not a manchild!

Sebastian

Oh dear, where do I begin with him. He is an enigma to me. I’m a little too old for his woe-is-me-the-world-sucks bullshit, but I’ll be damned if I don’t find him attractive. I think it’s because he reminds me of Cloud Strife....if Cloud Strife smoked and lived in his mother’s basement, sleeping in until noon. He was actually the last one I maxed out to ten hearts because he was always holed up in his bedroom on the computer all day! I was like GET A JOB.....but come to find out he was actually freelancing that whole time....haha

Shane

Shane....oh Shane......sigh. He and I got off on the wrong foot immediately. It was his birthday, and I ran into him in the saloon, chugging away next to the fireplace. I had a can of Jojo soda in my inventory, so I gifted that to him, thinking HEY THIS DUDE LOOKS THIRSTY BY THE WAY HE’S GUZZLING THAT BEER. Boy was I wroooong. He hated me for giving him “trash” on his birthday. So after getting to know him, I had a soft spot in my heart for this suicidal alcoholic. But.....I’m not here to be anyone’s keeper, or to fix anyone. He’s getting his shit together slowly, sure, but I’m not so certain he’s husband material. HOWEVER. Look how freaking cute he is with his chicken, Charlie.

The Bachelorettes:

Abigail

She was the first person I asked to dance with at the Flower Dance festival, but of course she said no since I had no friendship built up with her. But as I got to know her, I really started to dislike her. Much like Alex and Sam, she strikes me as being in her early teens with her behavior and childish attitude towards her parents so that makes me want to stay far faaaar away from her as a marriage candidate. 

Emily

I found it especially hilarious that during the Stardew Valley fair, she remarks that she always thought she’d make a good clown, because she sure looks like one to me. I don’t know what it is about her....maybe the pale skin and the red lips with blue hair....but she looks ridiculous to me. I like her carefree disposition, and the camping date we went on was adorable....yet I just can’t get past her design.

Haley

Beneath that pretty girl vapid exterior lies.....a pretty girl vapid interior. While the photography date with her was cute, I just don’t find substance in her at all. I was hoping for more with her character development by the time we reached 10 stars. I was very disappointed. I do appreciate her passion for photography, though.

Leah

Ah yes, my girl Leah. She has her shit together more than any other NPC I feel. Here was a woman who lived in a big city with her significant other, but decided to break up due to conflicting goals. She made her way to Stardew Valley, bought her own cottage, and pursued her dream of becoming an artist even though she has trouble paying her bills sometimes. She’s self-sufficient, mature, resourceful, and a go-getter. She is spouse material in my mind. I would totally date her IRL if I could. Plus, she’s a redhead which is an absolute turn-on for me.

Maru

I have tried so hard to like Maru, but much like Abigail, she strikes me as being in her teens or early twenties or something. I feel like a creeper considering her as a marriage candidate. I love her zany ideas and her dedication, but she’s too childlike for my comfort.

Penny

Another gorgeous redhead. I’m so conflicted with Ms Penny, because I want to whisk her away from her alcoholic mother and bad home life, and treat her like a queen on my farm, but I can’t shake the feeling that she would be marrying me for all the wrong reasons. There were a few bits of her dialogue here and there that struck me as desperate. Of course I don’t blame her and I think she would make a wonderful wife, but I feel like she should grow as an individual and make her own way in life before becoming anyone’s housewife. I’d hate to see her go from being her mother’s slave, to being tied down with more of the same domesticity. But I mean, if that’s what she truly wants, then who am I to stop her? 

.......YES I REALIZE SHE’S A FICTIONAL CHARACTER. 

I feel like I’ve helped to narrow down my choice through this break down analysis: Bachelors: Harvey or Shane Bachelorettes: Leah or Penny

I find it funny that both Harvey and Leah seem the most put together and stable, while Shane and Penny are sympathy cases/”fixer-uppers.” I think it reflects my current real state of being 34 and tired of dealing with people’s bullshit, of wanting to find someone who’s capable and steady, while also wanting to be that way myself. Then there’s a part of me that I can’t ignore...the truth that I AM a sympathy case currently, but despite that, I also have a sense of wanting to help others as I’ve been helped in my life thus far. 

Who knew this silly little game could be this telling of my own nature? 

.....epiphany aside, I still NEED TO MAKE A CHOICE.

[proserpine-in-phases]

@nachttour tagged me in a writing question thing!

1) is there a story you’re holding off on writing for some reason?

uh yeah there’s like, several. some of them are better developed than other but a lot of the reason I’ve been holding off on writing them just comes down to feeling inadequate due to my own limited experience with relationships and feelings of complete inadequacy. it’s hard to write an epic romancu when I’m aromantic as fuck and have a hard time conceptualizing what those feelings might be like to experience, for example, or like, I want the story to be funny but I feel like I’m not actually a very funny person?

also I always feel like I need to do more research. I get stuck on the research phase about 85% of the time haha

2) what work of yours, if any, are you the most embarrassed about existing?

man I am embarrassed by MYSELF existing, so  idk probably all of it when you get right down to it

3) what order do you write in? front of book to back? chronological? favorite scenes first? something else?

it seems to vary a bit. sometimes I just power through start to finish, but sometimes I need to write the ending first to remind myself of what I’m shooting for. sometimes I just gotta write some random scenes in the middle before I forget what they are and have to figure out where they’ll go later.

considering the longest thing I’ve managed to finish comes in at about 12 k  I don’t know if I have enough data to really come up with a firm answer for this one though. from what I can tell, it really does seem like I start at the beginning and go for a bit, write the end, and try to connect the two with occasional random middle bits getting written out of order and a general feeling of “I’ll fix it in post” carrying me through

4) favorite character you’ve written

probably Samantha Traynor. she’s such a fucking nerd and I love her. it was surprisingly easy to write for her once I got started. at least I THINK I did a good job writing her, I have no actual idea haha

5) character you were most surprised to end up writing

I’ve written TWO mass effect fics featuring Samara as a main character and I have no idea how this happened or why because she’s about in the middle when it comes to my most to least favorite mass effect characters list

6) something you would go back and change in your writing that it’s too late/complicated to change now

there’s a couple of fics I wrote for fic exchanges that I kinda wish I could take back and turn into something else because I love the concept but feel guilty about idk, using as a springboard because the original is a gift, or something. it feels ehhhhhhhhh disingenuous to continue them when the gift is supposed to be a singular and self contained unit

for example, oh man I would love to take that vrisrezi space pirates au someplace, but I don’t know if I should because the fic itself is a gift, complete, and so forth. 

plus I hate the way I run out of steam about 4 chapters into everything. I would like to not run out of motivation please

7) when asked, are you embarrassed or enthusiastic to tell people that you write?

considering my output is so low I barely consider myself a writer at all tbh.

but yes, embarrassed. I hope to god the three people I know irl who follow me just like. never see those posts haha

8) favorite genre to write

space adventure! and lately? mysteries even though I have no FUCKING idea why or even how to write them, which is why I have at least three projects stalled out on me haha

9) what, if anything, do you do for inspiration?

I read a lot, mostly. sometimes I stare at a wall. or play minesweeper. 

also when I’m doing something fairly mindless sometimes my mind wanders and I hit something. 

oh and music. music is great

10) write in silence or with background noise? with people or alone?

I usually need music, mood music preferable, instrumental so the lyrics don’t distract me. generally I prefer to not be around people when I write, though a public setting is also fun to write in. I’m too distractable to actually get any done though, so I usually end up just looking like a tool with their notebook out if I try to write in a coffee shop or whatever tho, haha

11) what aspect of your writing do you think has most improved since you started writing?

I think writing fanfic has really helped me figure out what it means to write in character. also I think I’m starting to get better at balancing dialogue versus narration? at least a little bit

12) your weaknesses as an author

the inability to actually finish shit. 

unwillingness to approach emotions that make me feel uncomfortable. 

the fact that I often approach writing a character with the thought of what I would do in a situation rather than what the character would do (which is why writing fanfiction is helping me with that haha)

coming up with plots that lend themselves well to longer stuff

13) your strengths as an author

pretty good at dialogue

when it comes to my own shit, pretty good at coming up with interesting fantasy worlds (I think they’re interesting at least)

I’ve got a pretty firm grasp overall just the nuts and bolts of writing: I mean I tutored English in college for fuck’s sake I know how to write a grammatically correct run on sentence when I want to 

14) do you make playlists for your current wips?

not really

15) why did you start writing?

I wanted to know what happened next

16) are there any characters who haunt you?

not really? I mean, there are specific character TYPES that’ll get me every time, though, like the happy go lucky person who has to learn what pain is but still come out the other side a LOT worse for wear but not completely broken (think Tasslehoff Burrfoot, or perhaps less obscure Vash the Stampede) but I wouldn’t say they haunt me, per say

17) if you could give your fledgling author self any advice, what would it be?

don’t be afraid to be self indulgent. you’ll enjoy it more and who the fuck cares, anyway? people who’ll make fun of you for doing what you love are ass holes

18) were there any works you read that affected you so much that it influenced your writing style? what were they?

If I’m honest I can’t really say what influences my writing style, if I even have one. Mostly all I can do is list off my favorite authors because I’m pretty sure they all have something to do with it. 

so let’s just do that I guess.  when I was a teenager I tended to find a single author and just read through all their works before moving on, and these are the big ones that stand out:

Connie Willis, Anne McCaffrey, Steven Brust and Ursula K. Le Guin. Connie Willis for the humor she includes in almost all her writing, Anne McCaffrey because I STILL spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about Pern. She had a real skill for coming up with both great characters and great settings, even if what she did with them, and also her inability to keep continuity were less good. Steven Brust introduced me to the idea of relating to morally reprehensible characters at an alarmingly young age. Ursula K. Le Guin, I just love her. No idea if it’s actually done anything GOOD to my writing but she gives me something to aspire to.

I read just. a ridiculous amount of fantasy and science fiction as a kid, the genres as a whole without a doubt influence the type of shit I end up writing. also in seventh grade I mainlined dragonlance, just the whole damn thing

later in college I got really into Margaret Atwood. her focus on female characters and narrative just is really great.  

then I went through a depressive phase in my late 20s and just exclusively read Julia Quinn, Joanna Lindsey, Sabrina Jeffreys and Eloisa James, and that was IT. so I’m pretty sure my foray into the romance genre is what makes me honestly prefer povs limited to two or three characters  hey, reading romance novels also lead me to the realization that I’m aromantic so \o/ I guess

19) when it comes to more complicated narratives, how do you keep track of outlines, characters, development, timeline, ect.?

I outline and then give up lol

20) do you write in long sit-down sessions or in little spurts?

little spurts until something grabs me and makes me marathon. usually that’s a deadline, but sometimes it’s also inspiration 

21) what do you think when you read over your older work?

mostly just holy shit I can’t believe I wrote this! sometimes that’s bad, sometimes it’s good. I can’t really tell if I’m good at divorcing myself from my writing enough to give me perspective on it, to tell the truth, because for a good lot of it, I still think it’s pretty good so ???

22) are there any subjects that make you uncomfortable to write?

it’s hard for me to let a character be embarrassed by the dumb shit they do. I don’t want them to do dumb shit because of it, which makes it hard for the character to have shit to grow and learn from.

23) any obscure life experiences that you feel have helped your writing?

I’m pretty sure my own issues with having and experiencing some emotions makes its way into the stuff I choose to write about, especially when it comes to the original stuff (I have. at LEAST three different plot outlines that involve characters literally losing the ability to experience emotions and having to find a way to heal or gain it back haha)  

also the fic I wrote about the box ghost is literally just about what it’s like to work in a factory haha

24) have you ever become an expert on something you previously knew nothing about, in order to better a scene or a story?

listen. 

yes.

I fucking. LOVE. research. 

honestly this is the stage where I most often get lost in the weeds, distracted by my own need to know more

25) copy/paste a few sentences or a short paragraph that you’re particularly proud of

“He was not the knight Casey taught him to be, but he was close enough for government work“ remains the single best pun I’ve ever written

tagging: @anthropwashere @inktail @manicpixiesdreamdragon if you guys are up for it!