#notsofriendlyfriendlyrambles

[notsofriendlyfriendlyreminder]

My first playthrough: 1 thought per chapter

Beginning: HOLY FUCK IT'S FINALLY INSTALLED THIS BETTER BE GOD

Colter: I cannot fucking aim for shit Mafia taught me nothing- CAN THE DEER NOT MOVE

Horseshoe Overlook: This game is fucking HUGE I WANNA EXPLORE EVERYTHING- Also why can't I go to Blackwater I didn't pay attention-

Clemens point: Fuck them inbred americans #europe4life- SEAN WHATTHEFUCK

Shady Belle: KIERAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNN- Oh fuck I am attached to all of these cowboys

Guarma: WHERE THE FUCK AM I- oh cool parrots

Beaver Hollow: we're gonna die we're gonna die we're gonna die we're gonna die we're gonna die

Epilogue 1: IM STILL GRIEVING WHATTHEFUCK

Epilogue 2: die Micah MUAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAH

[notsofriendlyfriendlyreminder]

appretiation post for my parents

I think it's important to remember that even though our parents and grandparents are old, don't understand everything and generally can be more rasist or homophobic, we should still listen to what they have to say.

We are taught to see and learn from history when it comes to wars and generally stuff we can point to and say "yes that is bad."

But from talks with my mom in the car, with my grandma between trashtalking neighbours and with my dad on long car rides, you start to realise they do know what is bad. They do see the huge society issues, but they might not talk about it as much.

The generation of my parents were raised in a way to focus on work, marriage, have a house and children. They were the children of people who lived through the hard soviet comunism, so it's understandable they were lead to focus on the capitalist dream- make money and when you can't, retire and die.

Time and again, and older I get, I need to remind myself how many generational traumas they are breaking. How many times instead of screaming, hitting or doing something they vitnessed themselves they chose to be calm. They had to choose to not be like their parents, my grandparents.

This is a friendly, and gentle, reminder to listen to older people, at least some of the stuff they say :))

[notsofriendlyfriendlyreminder]

TW: ED

I got an assigment in school to watch my weekly food intake, even count the calories, and suprisingly not once the teacher mentioned ED during it?

Like I feel like at some point she should have been like "Yea making sure your intake is healthy is okay but be careful not to go into the ed area, also if it's triggering to someone talk to me after class."

LIKE as someone who wants to become a teacher (granted, not biology) I think it would be the right time to touch on that?

I MIGHT BE OVERTHINKING THIS but at the same time EDs are very normalized and with heroine shick coming back (is it or is it not?) I think it should be mentioned from time to time.

[notsofriendlyfriendlyreminder]

main characters of my book

Morte: very powerful witch, gets bored without a something or someone to chase, literally addicted to chocolate

Ossa: an ex-perfect student, why is she with them, has literally zero friends

Pherenike: huge alcohol problem, will commit murder, tall

Faray: why do you have tiny waist to be hugged by other men? a vampire in denial with the fact he cannot die

[notsofriendlyfriendlyreminder]

I wrote like circa 20 pages of pure text and suddenly I have the urge to delete it and rewrite it from a pov of a different character.

[notsofriendlyfriendlyreminder]

the current book i started working on has like a half a plot but it is going???? somewhere??? do i know where??? no but I caught that train and I cannot leave.

[notsofriendlyfriendlyreminder]

TW: suicidal thought mention

While I am still fighting with writing a fictional book, I am playing with the idea of an personal/biography/journal/notes-type book. We were putting it together with one of my friends during language class. Every chapter would start the same, with the phrase I want to kill myself, and then it would be followed by a random thought spree. Here is one I would want to use.

I want to kill myself, but not today. The sun is finally shining and my walks home are enjoyable. When I leave the hot bus, and pollen swallows me, and I feel the sun on my skin, I don't want to run home. I stop and watch the flowers that sprouted next to the roud. The white ones, the purple ones, I need to learn their names. Oh dandelion, what have you done that I remember your name? You're strong, alone and in a group, a sea of suns looking at me. And while your strenght doesn't wither, your heart becomes weaker. In few weeks, I'll caress you gently, and you'll fly away. I won't follow you yet. No, not yet. I have to make a painting for my room. Will you be my muse? Do you promise to stand still? Is that too much to ask? The dogs greet me behind the fence. They know me, I walk here everyday. If I stand still they'll stop. I will never scream at you, you protect. The final strech is a steep hill, my legs become lighter, and I wanna run to the sky. It's so blue. It's that where you have gone? Where will I go? When? Oh, not today, my grandma is outside with her friend.