#nothing they could’ve said or done could’ve changed their fate
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cupofearlgreytea · 3 months ago
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circling the first move in red in my paperback copy of datvd because i’m that type of insane
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kyber-crystal · 6 months ago
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red thread || jake “hangman” seresin
summary: fate has a funny way of bringing people together, and it’s made no exception for you and hangman. you’ve grown up together; there's not a day that goes by in which you aren't glued to each others' sides. as kids, you promised each other that if you were still single at 30 you'd get married. but when that day finally arrives, you wonder just how much things will change.
words: ~2.3k
warnings: nothing. unless you’re like me and commitment scares you, then yeah lmao. hangman is an absolute gentleman in this though :) biggest TW is my writing...sorry. idk what happened. some slight mentions of angst and injury but nothing graphic :)
a/n: mannn my writing has gone downhill idk how yall other talented writers do it. i wish i could write that well 😭but, i’m proud of this...plotwise, at least! (my fics are doing so bad for some reason while everyone else seems to be blowing up??? idk) btw, the first part of this fic takes place two years before tgm
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It was 1:30 a.m, and you couldn’t fall asleep. 
It seemed that Hangman had the same idea as you as he told you to meet him outside the Hard Deck in five. The coastal air and Jake Seresin was the perfect combination to help you unwind, so of course you said yes. 
“There she is,” he grinned as he offered a helping hand. “My favorite fellow insomniac.”
“Nightmares keep you up, Jake?” you teased. “What’s the matter this time?”
“Same as you. Don’t feel like sleeping yet,” Hangman answered. “Can you believe it? We’re awake, and Fanboy and Payback aren’t.”
“Now that’s a first,” you laughed. “Thought I’d never live to see that day, but here we are.”
“We’re making history day by day.”
“You know…sometimes,” you breathed out as you rested your head on his shoulder, “I wonder what it’d be like if we never met.”
“Didn’t you ask that same question fifteen years ago?”
“We were much younger back then. It’s different now.”
“Well, then…I don’t like to imagine it.”
Your brows furrowed. “Why not?”
“It’d be weird. You’ve always been a big part of my life, so to think you almost could’ve not been in it…it’s weird. Uncomfortable, even.”
“Yeah, it is weird…” your voice trailed off as you lingered on the thought. You’ve always done everything together. How different would your lives be now if you hadn’t become friends; hadn’t stayed in touch through college? “But don’t be sad, because I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon.”
Hangman gave you a light punch in the arm. “I’m not complaining.”
“Good.”
“You know, Y/N…there’s one more thing.”
“Uh oh.”
“Hear me out,” he started. “Remember that deal we made when we were kids?”
“The one about helping each other bury a body if needed, or getting married?”
“The second one…I thought the first was a given since the day we met. That’s something all friends are supposed to do for each other, right? Bury bodies, hide their trails…all that good stuff.”
“What about the second one?”
“We’re turning 30 soon,” he recounted. Any and all traces of cockiness were completely wiped off his face. “And we said that if we’re both still single by the time our 30th birthdays roll around, we’d get married.”
You smiled as you revisited the memory: wide-eyed and curious, and so blissfully unaware with the only worry in the world was whether you’d grow up together or not. “You still remembered all that?”
“Of course I did. You still in, or what?”
“I guess so…I mean, what else do I have to lose?”
The two of you fall back into your comfortable silence, and he wraps you up into his arms. 
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TWO YEARS LATER
As usual, the base is busy and rather chaotic: day after day you’re busy filing reports and training. This causes you to become prone to forgetting the littler things in your life, so you assign Bob to keep track of them for you. He had the best memory of anyone you knew—that man kept mental notes of everything. 
“What do I have to do today, Floyd? Any events…”
“Uhhh…” Bob thought for a moment as you took a long drink of water. “Dinner with Phoenix. Do laundry. Don’t get yelled at by Cyclone for the 19th time (You’re only one point behind Bradshaw, he’s at 20). Grocery shopping. And most importantly…yours’ and Hangman’s birthday.”
“Oh, shit, I completely forgot,” you swore under your breath. “How could I forget…”
“You have some time, so don’t worry. Five days.”
“Only five days?” your eyes widened. “I have to run through four more simulations over the next two. I can’t plan everything in the remaining three.”
“If you pay Garcia in Doordash deliveries, he’ll help out. You know he minored in art.”
“That’s…actually not a bad idea.”
After you finish your final exercise that week, you pass out, but luckily, Hangman’s right there to catch you so you don’t get a concussion. Bless that man—he always seemed to be around wherever you went and you were very grateful for it. 
You were delirious and couldn’t walk straight, so as much as you claimed you were okay, he wouldn’t believe you. 
“I’m taking you home because you’re in no condition to be wandering around by yourself. The birthday planning can wait. You’ve tired yourself out enough as it is and you don’t want to make things worse.” So you let him help you get into his car, then drive you home and lead you inside. Then, he forced you to go upstairs to take a hot shower and relax while he cooked up dinner for you. 
Though Hangman admired your determined spirit, it scared the hell out of him because you wouldn’t know when to stop yourself. 
“I got that from you though! Who’s the one I spend the most time around?” you’d claim in response to that  argument. You weren’t wrong—it was a quality you picked up from him many years ago.
You woke up the next morning to the smell of French toast and jam, which lessens the tension in your shoulders right away. Amidst the early morning light drifting through the windows he stands out like a priceless work of art in a museum. You struggle to tear your eyes off him. 
Rubbing the sleepiness from your eyes, you rested your chin on his shoulder and exhaled. “Hey.”
“Morning. You sleep okay? How’s that headache of yours?”
“I’m alright.” You closed your eyes and inhaled the sweet scent of cinnamon sugar. “This smells nice.”
If Hangman was tired, you couldn’t tell. “Woke up at 6:30 to relearn the recipe for you. It’s been a while, it took three burnt batches to get the hang of things.”
“You woke up an hour early to cook for me?” 
“Why else? Of course I did,” he stated matter-of-factly. 
You sat down at the kitchen island together and ate your breakfast in silence. Something about this moment feels more domestic than all the others you’ve shared in the past, and you can’t help but smile. You wouldn’t mind spending the rest of eternity like this...
“Y/N, there’s some honey on your chin.”
You blinked, trying to find it. “Where?”
“Hold on a sec.” Hangman took his napkin and rubbed gently at the corner of your lip to wipe it off. For a brief moment, you could feel his warm breath fanning across your face. You stayed as still as possible. “There.”
If anyone looked in from the outside, it was another simple day in the life of a longtime couple. But for you and Jake, it’s always been like this. Showing up at each others’ place wasn’t unusual for either of you; if anything, it was quite normal. 
“...Thanks.”
“Yeah. You got any ideas in mind? For the big day.”
“Whatever you want is what I want.”
“Funny enough, that’s what I was about to tell you,” he replied.” 
You locked eyes with each other and laughed. “We’ll figure it out. I’m sure we will.”
Less than three days until everything as you knew it would change forever...if you were being honest, you were absolutely terrified. What if he changed his mind and left you in the dust, all alone? You weren’t ready to face the cold truth. 
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Hangman offered a simple celebration: food and drinks at the Hard Deck with the crew, then some karaoke if you were up for it after. He starts it off by serenading you at the bar, reaching a hand out to you as he sang your favorite Billy Joel track. You let him lead you out to the dance floor and spin you around, and he’s equal parts addicting as he is entertaining. 
Thirty candles, and you agree on blowing out fifteen each—somehow, by some miracle, you manage to do exactly that, and it’s perfect. Then Fanboy yells that he and Rooster want a rematch with you in Just Dance…so you go at it for two hours straight, until sweat is dripping down your face and your sweater grows hot. 
You’re burnt out, and he can see the look in your eyes as you step aside to let Phoenix play. “You want to head out? There’s something I want to show you.”
You nod. “Okay.”
He gives Maverick a look, and the captain shoots him a subtle nod in return. He takes this as his signal to put his hand on the small of your back and lead you out the door. 
You can’t help but laugh a little as you get outside. “Is this Mav’s motorcycle?”
“No…” Hangman shifts from foot to foot, feigning cluelessness. 
“Did you steal it?”
“Of course not.”
“It’s his, isn’t it.”
“Look, he let me borrow it for the night. It’s not stealing if he says it’s okay…besides, he never noticed when I did steal from him last week—”
“What did you—do you even have a motorcycle license?”
“Got it a year ago. I thought, ‘maybe I’ll take my best girl on a ride someday, so who knows if it’ll come in handy’. So here we are now.”
“That’s very sweet.”
“Alright, now come on.” He swung his leg over the side and motioned for you to sit behind him. The cushion was not in fact, cushiony, and you found yourself growing colder by the second.
The bike burst forward without warning. You let out a small yelp and immediately wrapped your arms around Hangman’s waist—which was ridiculously firm…had he been working out more lately?—as you went speeding down the road. 
“If I die, I’m gonna kill you and haunt you in your sleep,” you mumbled into the fabric of his jacket. “Even in death, I’ll stick to you always.”
“That sounds both morbid and weirdly romantic.”
“Shut up.”
Several minutes later you found yourselves by the cliffs, standing high over the ocean, and deja vu hits almost right away. After we go on this make up date, he had said, I’m going to find that guy who messed you up and mess him up. Then we’re going to go home, I’ll let you wear any of my sweatshirts you want, and we’ll watch true crime. One where someone like that jerk dies. Okay? Okay.
You’re miles away from Top Gun, miles away from your jet and your uniform and everything you’ve ever known, but you’ve never felt more at home than now. It’s in this moment in which you realize all you really need in the world is Jake, the sky above you, and the sea below you. 
Out of the corner of your eye you noticed that he’s getting fidgety. He can’t stop stuffing his hands in and out of his pockets or running them through his hair—he’s restless. The action takes you by surprise a bit. 
“Why are you all tensed up?” you questioned. “It’s just me and a nice sunset. We’ve done things like this many times.”
“But it’s not just you and a sunset,” he explained. “I’m supposed to be asking you the most important question of our lives. That’s a big deal, sweetheart.”
Your heart spluttered to a stop. “Are you…”
“Let me finish,” Jake cut in. “If you could be quiet for a few minutes…that would help. I’m nervous.”
“Jake Seresin, nervous?” you teased. “That’s a first.”
He smiled and shook his head. “Give me a break.”
“Okay, okay. I’ll be nice…for now.”
“I haven’t slept at all in the past week. I went to eleven different jewelry stores around San Diego but nothing seemed to scream ‘Y/N’. So, I decided to take a trip out of state.” He cleared his throat, and reached into his jacket pocket. You saw his hand shake as he did so. “Out of the country. That mini mission I went on while you were training? I was in Canada. Victoria, to be specific. Maverick and Rooster came along to help out.”
Now in his hand was a small velvet box, and inside was the most breathtaking ring you’d ever seen. “Diamond and ruby. They don’t sell plain red strings for rings…so I had them design this. The red thread of fate…the one that brought you into my life. We were kids when we promised to spend our lives together, if circumstances permitted. And I know we might’ve been young, but I’d be lying if I said I could imagine myself with someone that wasn’t you. There was a part of me that wished you wouldn’t find anyone before this day came along. It’s you, Y/N. It always has been.
“I’m not going to get down on one knee. I’m not going to give you a long, cheesy speech about divine power and soulmates. But I’m going to tell you this: you’re my forever, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. It’s getting cold out so I’ll cut to the chase: what I’m saying here is that I’m asking you to marry me.”
The world fell silent as you replied with a shaky nod, holding out a trembling hand as Jake slid the golden band onto your ring finger. Neither of you made a sound, and you swore you felt time stop and the ground crack wide open beneath your feet.
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tags, including those who may be interested: @callsignbarb @sarcastic-sourwolf @totomoshi @sebastianstangirl01 @dilfsandtherapy @purelyfiction @yeehawnana @lunamoonbby @hazelgirl355 @multifandom-fangirl4 @paintballkid711 @lyn-lc @spawn0fsatan @milestomaverick @teacactusworld @newlibrary @cherry-waved @ellabellabus07 @criminalyetminimal @whatlovegattado @thisismypointofview @ice-mans-world @burnedbrisket @fangirlinc @knowledgefulbutterfly @levis-butterfingers @lunamooncole @coastingline @chaoticassidy @hbstre @fantasias-creativebubble @light-the-moon @winteryoungie @aie1840 @midnightdevotion @julia-marshal @anya7802 @bittergomez @and-claudia @cosm1cfae @tallrock35 @uwiuwi @elenavampire21 @aerangi @hoedameronsworld @whotfatemywaffles @littlebadariell
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gay-dorito-dust · 4 months ago
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Jason todd with an s/o who died with him and they see each other again after a few years? Thank youuu!
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When thinking of how your reunion with Jason would be like, this wasn’t what you had in mind, then again you didn’t think that your life would’ve been taken so young either until it was.
You both came back…different, vastly unlike the people you once were.
You knew you were supposed to be dead in that empty casket six feet underground like you should’ve been, but you weren’t and neither was Jason as fate had different plans for you both. A fate that ended up with you and Jason splitting up, wanting nothing but the best for the other despite knowing that no one would knew how you felt, especially when it came to being unceremoniously brought back in a body vastly different from the one you died in.
You and Jason never got to experience most things that other people had in your time of being dead. So much so that trying to navigate a fully grown body while trying to, or to cry out in frustration had you feeling more alone and isolated than ever.
You had long accepted that you and Jason were no longer the people you once were, and decided for yourself to try and attempt to lead your life as normal as possible. Whereas Jason was hellbent on getting back at the person who killed you both, while dealing with his own feelings of betrayal upon hearing that that man who took him in, had assumably done nothing during this time; You on the other hand knew that Bruce would’ve at least beat the joker with an inch of his life for certain, but chose to let Jason find out on his own terms.
He was a flurry of emotions and even you didn’t know what to do to calm him down because you weren’t those young kids anymore, you were ghosts brought back to haunt Gotham and remind them of their continuous failures. Life hasn’t changed when you both died and while you weren’t as bothered by it, Jason on the other hand found it hard to grasp that no one did anything to avenge you both, and unfortunately started talking to the gun.
You no longer could reason with him as he didn’t wish to listen to reason in his state at the time. It hurt to leave him as he was your first and possibly only love of your life, but you didn’t wish to see the man you love kill himself for a second time. You honestly didn’t think you’d see him again until you saw Jason’s bulky silhouette outside your window one night and immediately felt nostalgic of the past once again.
‘Jason.’ You said as you opened your window for him to crawl through with a grunt with just how big he was. You would’ve once laughed at this sight, but now you could only stare as your former lover with longing and mourning simultaneously, eyes racking his form and seeing just how much he has changed with scars of all sizes littered him from the neck down.
‘Baby bird.’ He replied softly, which didn’t help in making you grow more upset of the future you could’ve had with Jason had it not been robbed from you. ‘Sorry for dropping in you without warning. Your place was just closer.’ He adds as he sits himself down on your bed and took in the sight of your room, feeling an ache in his own heart when he saw a framed photo of a younger version of yourselves smiling on your desk. Feeling guilty, Jason quickly averted his eyes from the framed photo when he felt a lump in his throat beginning to form.
He couldn’t help but get mad at how unfair this fate was for you specifically, he didn’t care about himself as he was sure this was his fate from the beginning, but you? You deserved everything and so much more than what you were given. You were a big reason as to why he wanted revenge, why he wanted to get even, he did it because he felt that you were done dirty and he wasn’t going to allow for it; However in doing so, he had lost you in the process and he hated himself for it ever since.
‘That’s fine.’ You tell him as you sit down next to him on the bed. ‘I’m just glad that you’re still breathing considering the state I last saw you all.’ You trialed off as the stench of blood, Jason’s blood, that you’ve tried to block from memory came back to greet you in remission of the worst day of your life. You didn’t want to see him that hurt ever again, you couldn’t handle it without fearing that you were loosing him to revenge and violence; However the Jason you saw before you looked like a man who had long since learned a valuable lesson in all this, and was now trying to regain control of his life however he could.
Jason sighed as he too remembered that night he came back to you drenched in his own blood, he remembered the look upon your face and the tears brimming your eyes like it were yesterday. ‘I’m sorry. Im so fucking sorry you had to witness that, I just wanted to-‘
‘Make things right by getting back at those who wronged us. I know.’ You cut Jason off and placed your hand on the back of his, paying close attention to how he seemingly stiffened under your touch before visibly relaxing. ‘But revenge isn’t going to give us our lives back.’
‘Lives that were ripped away from us without reason.’ Jason reminded you with a bitter taste on his tongue.
‘If you did get revenge, what would it do other than remind you that you wasted all that time and energy only for nothing to change with one dead man laid at your feet. What then?’ You snapped, glaring daggers into the man beside you as he looked ahead at the wall in front of him with a distant look in his eye, ‘Will you feel vindicated in what you’ve done or realise that you’ve been reclaiming your life in that time?’ You took a deep breath to calm yourself down and closed your eyes as you felt yourself give into every emotion you swore you wouldn’t return to, you’ve just wanted to move on and live a life while you could.
While yes, you were angry that your life had been snuffed out so short, but you weren’t about to make your second chance at life all about revenge. It wasn’t worth it if it meant loosing valuable time over.
‘So you expected me to do nothing while the man who did this to us lives freely?’ Jason questions as he looks at you with disbelief, the Lazarus pit’s influence glowing within his eyes but you weren’t easily scared off by it, not when you also suffered from the influence of the Lazarus pit every night before bed.
‘Life didn’t halt when we died Jason.’ You remind him as you reached up to hold his face between your hands, stroking his cheeks while smiling at him softly. ‘Nor did it change when we came back the way we did, it continued on. We can harbour hate in our hearts and scream at the sky about unfairness, but we’ll surly loose breath in our lungs before anything is done about our suffering.’ You then rested your forehead against his own as you breathed him in. ‘So why not live while we are given the second chance, no matter how unusual it may be.’ You added barely above a whisper.
Jason knew you were right and as he leans towards your touch, slowly wanting more and more of it while he was here, he felt a weight within his chest lifted. ‘I was doing it for you.’ He tells you. ‘Out of everyone in this shit hole you deserved this fate the least and I couldn’t help but feel hopeless, powerless even when you died in my arms, only to come back vengeful when we were brought back by the Lazarus pit.’ Jason adds as he risked planting a kiss on your nose, making you a little teary eyed. ‘All I ever done was for you and it ultimately pushed you away, I’m sorry.’
You let a few tears slip your eye as you inhaled unevenly, pushing your forehead even more against his, just wanting nothing more than to feel him after being deprived of him for so long. ‘Don’t be sorry Jason, we were both lost and didn’t know how to feel about being brought back to life. It’s not a fate everyone can say they’ve been through like we have,’ you said with a halfhearted laugh. ‘so I don’t blame you for doing what you felt was necessary. I just wanted to live out my second life with you and I would’ve been happy.’ You admitted as Jason pulled you into his arms, holding you so tight as he presses his face into your shoulder to soak his tears that silently fell.
‘I’m sorry.’ He says weakly into your shoulder. ‘I’m so fucking sorry. I would’ve loved to have lived out my second life with you too and I would love to start doing that right away if that’s alright with you.’ He adds as you both wept into each other, holding onto each other for dear life.
‘Of course it’s okay,’ you told him, feeling happier then you’ve ever had in a long while as you were chocking on your own sobs, ‘It’s more then okay by me jay birdie.’ You burrowed yourself further into Jason and stayed like that until you both fell asleep with dried tears staining your cheeks, all the while the city outside your apartment continued on without so much as a care of this heartfelt reunion of lovers.
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tojiwrd · 1 year ago
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2: fate is fickle ; gojo satoru
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summary when satoru breaks off your engagement, you understand and accept it. but when he marries someone else, you don't understand because he didn't want to be tied down.
warnings swearing, gojo emotional constipation, lots of crying, mourning, death
word count 2k
a/n part 2 so we can feel smt
send requests ↞ prev next ↠ to be added to taglist
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You took a breath—a long and deep one that filled nearly every corner of your shaking body—as you raised your foot to lightly push against Satoru’s shin and send him stumbling back. If you were to keep this tapestry of being healed up for him to see, him being a hair’s breadth away from you would make it extremely difficult.
“I don’t wanna talk about anything, Gojo.” You paused, teeth fiddling with your lip before you looked up to meet his gaze that was steadfast and focused directly on you. “We broke up and you got married, remember?”
His jaw clenched like a person who was in a play and the character in the scene messed up their dialogue and now he had to improvise. In fact, that was surely what happened. 
“I know—fuck, I know. I was there.”
“Good, then that means we’re on the same page.”
This was the part where you grabbed your phone from the glass table beside you and walked past him to go to your room. And your body was itching in every part, waiting for you to do so, but your feet remained stationary on the ground. You were strong and you could walk away from Satoru, walk away from him like he did you. But a part of you was curious in a way you couldn’t explain. In your mind, there truly was nothing to explain on Satoru’s end except he was being a major asshole and messed up real bad. Still, the questions you’d thrown away out of nothing but embarrassment when you called him and Hana picked up lingered on your tongue once again. 
Nothing was said, though, and the pale moonlight coating both your figures remained the only source to prove you and him were there. Together. Alone. After so long. You reached down to grab your phone in an attempt to do exactly what you should’ve done minutes ago.
Satoru, sensing that his time was running out, reached out to you, almost encasing your arms with his fingers before he pulled back. “Listen, Y/N. I just don’t want you to hate me.” Your lips parted in shock at his words, rendering you completely and utterly speechless once again. “You were the first person who—” He paused, closing his eyes as he threw his head back in frustration. “You were the first person who loved me and I can’t go on knowing that you hate me.” There was a gleaming twinkle in his eyes as he reminded you of what you both once were, of what could’ve done.
The words flew out of your mouth quickly. “Satoru, what’s done is done. It’s selfish to hold onto how I was the first person who loved you because people change.” You sure did. Quickly. You kept those words to yourself, not wanting to show resentment over his actions and laying your heart completely on your sleeve, ripe for the picking. “And I think you need to be okay with people not liking you because that’s the way life is.”
The twinkle died. Not in burning, scorching flames, but in the gentlest way one’s shine could completely disappear from their visage. Like a wilted petal that slowly falls off its stem, the wind carrying it away. He was now looking at you with not hope, not pleading, but with complete and utter sadness—it was the same sadness you carried on your face for months while images of the two of you ran rampant through your mind. And there wasn’t a shred of you that could find itself to feel any form of sympathy for him because he never felt it for you.
“Y/N…” Your name was like a prayer that came out of his mouth, and you could see his eyes blinking furiously like they did when he was scrambling for any idea, any words to stop you from walking away. “I’m…”
You waited. Truly, you did, but the apology never came. It reminded you of all the times you’d argued with Satoru, and ended up taking him back in your arms once you cooled down and he diverted your mind from the matter. He never apologized, though, and you always realized that much after you took him back, once the wound was healed enough that a doctor would turn you away if you came asking for a checkup.
Nothing had changed, and when you walked away from the balcony, the empty glass of wine heavy in one hand and phone in another, you felt at ease. Because nothing had changed and Satoru wasn’t your problem anymore.
“That’s—he’s so, ugh!” Reina said, exasperated, once you recounted the events to her. You had to physically guide her to your bed and make her sit down with her hands on your lap while you thought about handcuffing her so she wouldn’t run to Satoru and Hana’s house and physically strangle him. But you glossed over it, severely underestimating your friend.
You rolled your eyes, perfectly showing her you agree, but she still asked, “You promise me that was it? That you walked away and didn’t like, I don’t know, run to him and kiss him like he’d just gotten back from war?”
You narrowed your eyes, moderately offended she could even suggest that after everything that went down between the two of you. “Fuck you,” you replied, chuckling as you swatted her on the arm. 
She turned her body to face you more, and you gathered all your courage to hear what she was preparing herself to say. “No matter what. No matter what, babe, you aren’t going to hear him out because he deserves none of your time and, in fact, doesn’t even deserve to do so much as breathe in your direction.” Her arms flailed around, an action that always occurred when she was giving you her honesty (and to smack the sense and direction you knew you needed into you). “And.” She took in a breath, as if it was taking everything in her to say the words. “He has a girl at home—he had a girl at home waiting for him the night of the dinner, too. And you don’t want to fall into the trap of a taken man, Y/N, trust me.”
When your mother walked into your room, eyes filled with steel determination, you braced yourself for a lecture about something you’d done recently.
“I’m not giving Takayashi the company,” she said, words laced with venom as your eyes narrowed. You knew she was hardballing, trying to get the Gojo’s to cough up every penny they could, but you thought that she’d sign it over—at least half of it—because it was built on your dad and Takayashi’s foundation. 
“Ma—”
“I don’t want to hear any debate about this, sweetheart. I’m doing exactly as your father would’ve wanted me to do, even if it means going throat to throat with a man as deadset as him. I just wanted to tell you so you wouldn’t hear it from word of mouth.”
You swallowed, confusion tangling into the web of emotions in your mind. “Papa was good friends with Mr. Gojo, wasn’t he? He only took the company because Mr. Gojo was dealing with legal problems?” Your words didn’t sound too sure, and it was because you remembered how your father spent the last few months of his life badmouthing the eldest of the Gojo family. “Or am I missing something?”
“He…” She began, feet padding across the floor as she reached your bed and took a seat on the edge. Her fingers traced the minimal pattern of the baby’s breath flowers on the blanket before she continued, “Takayashi, he tried to frame your father, in some way.” You gasped, a hand reaching over and cupping your mouth. “I know, I thought the same. But it’s truly a miracle what a man behind bars would do, the straws he would cling onto. Though he was soon proven to be lying, of course, and served his time.” 
“Mama.”
“I know he was probably trying to save his own skin and didn’t mean to betray your father, sweetheart, but this… this company is the last I have left of him. I can’t give it away for a wad of cash.”
Your lips trembled, and in that moment you realized you were looking into not just the eyes of your mother who’d sung lullabies to you and pretended as if the green vegetables were actually fancy chocolate to get you to eat them, but a woman who had been holding her husband as he paused in the middle of talking as his eyes grew as wide as saucers. She was the woman that willed to keep him breathing, breathing all he could as she hoped there was more—more time, more breath, you weren’t sure because you weren’t there—until he whispered his last words to her. She was the woman that cradled her own husband as he died because his last words were let me as he weakly cupped her jaw. She didn’t jump to call an ambulance because the small part—the realistic part—in her told her that this was it, and she’d heard too many stories of people losing their loved ones while they were stammering their words to a complete stranger over the phone, willing them to come at light speed. 
You knew how difficult grief was, and only had your mother to truly depend on after your father died. But your pain wasn’t the same as hers, and you understood. She’d lost the man she vowed to spend the rest of her life with, the man that she had been bound to for so long she couldn’t even look at another man as anything but a nuisance in her life.
“Mama, it’s okay,” you soothed. Your voice cracked as you realized how difficult it must’ve been for her to sit across the same man that betrayed her dead husband. 
She shook her head, as if she was physically trying to will away her thoughts, before she asked, “Are you? Okay, I mean.”
You nodded, a little too quickly. “Of course. Aside from, you know, papa…”
“I’m sorry you had to be around Satoru for so long.”
“Mama, please. I told you it’s nothing.” You giggled, a horrid attempt at not physically recoiling at how easily she’d caught onto everything. You had told her it was nothing, too, a few days after the wedding invitations arrived and she spotted the pink rhinestone underneath your desk, right next to your books, and asked you if you were okay. 
“I know you told me it’s nothing but could you tell me what happened? Only if you want to, of course. I may have heard you and Reina talking about Satoru the other day when I walked past your room; I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, of course, I only heard a bit of what Reina said.”
You grimaced, and decided to hell with it. “We were—” you hiccuped before you could even let out the next word. Your mother moved closer to you, eyes wary and attentive. You thought about it, thought about how your mother would’ve put her entire soul into making sure you and Satoru had the perfect wedding. “Mama, I can’t.”
A sob wracked through your entire body, and for a moment, you felt like you were seven once again and had just seen your crush spend recess with another girl as your body doubled over and your head was guided to her lap. Her fingers brushed through the strands of your hair, a touch that could only ever be a mother’s, as she used her soft, gentle voice to calm you down.
“Mama, we were engaged.”
Her fingers stopped midway through your hair, and underneath your skin, you felt her body go rigid. She was floored, and rightfully so. It wasn’t something she could’ve guessed, especially not after she’d seen the two of you at dinner the other day, so silent and indifferent it would be hard to imagine you were once ready to spend the entirety of your lives with each other. 
“Oh, baby.” You didn’t dare look up to see her expression, knowing it was marred with sorrow and pity. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”
The air was thick, and you were sure it would be hard for you to breathe because the air had been sucked out of the room the moment you told your mother about the engagement.
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justdarklr · 4 months ago
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In Stars And Time: Providence
An In Stars And Time x Persona AU
Created and Written by JustDarklr, Co-Created by mizzle-moths
Card I – Providential
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Spoilers for In Stars And Time below the cut! Go play the game before reading!
Table Of Contents —
Card I — Providential ( Reading Now )
Card II — Awake
You… have trouble believing this is the end of your journey. You should recap everything in your head real quick. Just to make sure you remember everything, mostly. Your memory’s never been that good, after all.
It was almost a year ago now that The King appeared, seemingly out of nowhere. Possessing immense Craft Power, he did something never heard of before— he spread his Curse across the country of Vaugarde, freezing in time everything in its path. With Dormont’s House of Change under his control, he patiently waits, for he knows his Curse can only be undone if he is defeated.
His victory would be all but determined, if not for The Housemaiden, Mirabelle. She is the only survivor of the House of Dormont, in which the King froze everyone inside in time and locked the gates. Everyone says she was blessed by the Change God themselves with the power to fight back the King’s Curse… which makes her the only one able to save Vaugarde, bound by her destiny.
When you met her, she had already been traveling with The Fighter, Isabeau, and The Researcher, Odile. They were trying to get the orbs necessary to open the House’s gates and defeat the King. You helped them defeat a rather strong Shadow, and, seeing your strength, they asked for your help. You… had nothing better to do, so you decided to accompany them!
Shadows are… a manifestation of grief, or something. You never researched them, but Odile seemed to know a bit about them, so you just took what she’s said at face value. They usually take the shape of figures from old Mythology or works of Fiction, though how they know of those forms is unknown. Some speculate that these Shadows had once been people, and they take the form of whatever they had the most attachment to in life upon their turning, but that theory has never been proven, supposedly. Either way, they’re a bit of a nuisance.
Anyways— a few weeks later, you met The Kid, Bonnie. Meeting them completed your little ragtag team of heroes. Though, Bonnie is mostly just your snack master. That doesn’t make them any less important, however!
You saw a lot of Vaugardian cities during your travels. Some frozen, some not, and you’ve done your best to sidestep the slowly encroaching Curse. Even still, though… you all kept going.
Mirabelle kept going to honor the Change God’s blessing, save her beloved house, and save Vaugarde. She didn’t have any other choice, after all— she is the only one who can.
Isabeau came with her after Vaugarde’s Defenders themselves refused to help. A bunch of cowards, probably.
Odile came to satisfy her curiosity about Vaugarde. She’s from another country, which makes sense, and she’s supposedly here to research… whatever she’s researching. … and because, in her words, “leaving the fate of a country to a bunch of young ones would give me an ulcer”.
Bonnie came to save their sister, frozen by the Curse. You worry about them, sometimes.
… you’re here because there’s nothing else for you to do. What else are you supposed to do except travel with them?
Once… Mirabelle asked if you were okay, following them on a journey to save the country. She felt guilty, like she was forcing everyone to follow her on a hopeless quest.
You wanted to put her at ease, so you said easily and truthfully that traveling with everyone was the happiest you could remember being. She… looked upset.
You cringe just thinking about it, honestly. Probably not the most considerate thing you could’ve said to someone with her problems at that moment!
But… tomorrow, one way or another, your journey will come to an end.
You tell everyone as you arrive that you’re tired, and you’re going to go find someplace to nap. They nod, and you’re off.
But… before you do, you have a stop to make. Just for some peace of mind. So, you head towards the favor tree on the west side of town.
… this tree is said to grant wishes. You’re not too sure about that, but… you may as well, right? You heard everyone else was going to, anyways. And, who knows, maybe it’ll come true?
You try to rack your brain for something to wish for. After a moment, something pops into your head. You’ve heard Isabeau mention something in passing before, haven’t you? That he wants to be a clothing designer, you think. That seems like a good wish to make. And, who knows, maybe it’ll help his dream come true, too.
You take a leaf from the favor tree, and whisper your desire into it three times.
“… I wish to be able to wear clothes Isabeau has made.”
… you pause, for a moment. And then whisper something else into the leaf, in addition to your first wish.
“I want to stay with them.”
This journey has been the most fun you can ever remember having. You… you love them. Your party. You’ve made such good friends on this journey, and you want to stay with them. Who wouldn’t? They’re your friends, after all…
You then fold the leaf over, and let it drift back into the shadow of the tree. You have a good feeling about that!
Afterwards, you get a move on. You find a clearing near the south side of town, slowly crouching down and splaying yourself across the soft grass. Feels just like a soft bed, you think. You haven’t slept in one for who knows how long. It’s just been sleeping bags, mostly. As you close your eyes, you feel yourself drifting off to sleep nearly instantly. You didn’t realize how tired you were…
… you dream of a strange room, covered in strange shades, with a strange man sitting in the middle of it. What is this place? You feel yourself walking forward, standing in front of the strange man’s desk, as he opens his mouth to speak.
“Well, isn’t this surprising? A brand new guest, and one with quite an intriguing fate at that. I wasn’t expecting anyone for some time now.”
You open your mouth to respond, but he cuts you off.
“Ah-ah. I apologize, but I will have to make this quick. Your nap is going to be rather short, after all.”
The man clears his throat, then places his hands on his desk, interlocking his fingers. You want to ask what he means about attendants, but you can’t get any words in before he starts speaking once more.
“Welcome to the Velvet Room. My name is Igor… I am delighted to make your acquaintance. This is the space between dream and reality, mind and matter. It is a space only those who are bound by a ‘contract’ may enter. And it seems that such a fate has already befallen you, even without your knowledge.”
What? But you don’t remember signing any contract. You… you could have, though. Maybe you’ve just forgotten. Maybe it was that insignificant in your mind.
“Now then… why don’t you introduce yourself?”
Finally, a chance to speak. You open your mouth once again, ready to belt out all the questions you have— but instead, all you’re able to say is your name. “Siffrin.”
“… Siffrin. No middle name, no last name. Is that correct?”
You nod. Stars, that’s annoying. Why can’t you talk? Dream logic, or something?? Ugh, this dream sucks.
“I see. An interesting name, but I suppose it is one befitting of one surrounded by as much mystery as you. Now then… why don’t we take a look into your future?”
A set of tarot cards appear on the man’s desk. He flips one over, and examines it closely.
“Ah… I see. The tower, in the reversed position. This card represents resistance to change, and the delaying of the inevitable…”
He flips another card over. You already don’t like this.
“The star, in the reversed position. A card representative of despair… I see.”
He flips one last card over. This has to be fake, right? It’s just a dream, without any meaning. You’re sure of it.
“… Judgement, in the upright position, representing reflection, and rebirth.”
The tarot cards disappear, and the man smiles at you. Like he has been, this entire time. Stars, you haven’t really gotten a good look at this guy— you’ve been kind of out of it, but something is off about him. His skin isn’t lightless or darkless, nor a shade inbetween, his smile never seems to falter, and his nose is far too long to be normal. Who is this man? … Well, you suppose you know the answer. ‘Igor’. A strange man, in a strange room, in a strange dream. That sums up this situation rather well, you suppose.
“It seems you will face a great trial in the near future. One in which you resist oncoming time, and face despair and hopelessness because of it.
But fear not. You will overcome this trial through reflection, and in the end, you will face rebirth. A new day to come. Yet, if you fail to overcome this trial, you may be forever lost. My duty is to provide assistance to our guests to ensure that does not happen.”
Your head hurts. This is a lot to take in at once.
“I would like to introduce my assistant to you, but it seems they’re not here as of yet. They’re late. But they will be here soon enough to accompany you throughout this perilous journey.
We shall attend to the finer details another time. Until then, farewell…”
Your vision faces to black, and…
You reawaken in the field to someone calling your name. Your head hurts from that dream. Too many weird shades to take in… but at least you’re back in your lightless and darkless world, now. Normalcy. That’s what you need right now.
… who’s calling your name?
CARD I — END
Next Card ~ Awake
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firestorm09890 · 8 months ago
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On Wuthering Heights and Canto VI (complete)
wow.
move over “Call me Ishmael” line, this is the Canto that most resembles its source book. We’ve got direct quotes! We’ve got scenes playing out like the original, beat for beat! I’m so glad I read Wuthering Heights beforehand, because unlike the previous ones where it just enhanced the experience a little (or even left me unsatisfied that they didn’t adapt certain things), I can’t imagine what it might’ve been like to not know everything in the book.
It’s kind of uncanny, actually, the extent to which things are similar. At the end of part 2 I was thinking about how there could’ve been a universe where the events of the book continued to stay the same if not for Erlking Heathcliff learning about the alternate worlds, and hey, after looking at so many universes of Catherine and Heathcliff making each other miserable, Dante (*edit: I wrote Cathy here first. I forgot it was Dante who saw it) found one where they’re happy together, both as ghosts, which! Is just the end of real actual Wuthering Heights!
We continued to have canon divergence in that way of "what if [character] had done something different?" which is always my favorite, even if some of it was just visions into a timeline where things were different. What if Heathcliff recognized he was just as bad as Hindley when it came to Hareton? What if Heathcliff and Cathy hadn't gone to spy on Thrushcross Grange that night? What if Heathcliff had stayed to listen to the rest of what Cathy had to say?
It's a tragedy, and Erlking Heathcliff, and our Heathcliff, and every other Heathcliff believed that it was the type where he was doomed from the start, because of who he is, and nothing can change that. But Dante knew that no, actually, it's a tragedy because of the choices that were made, and they can't be changed now, but you can change, and that's how you change your fate.
Individual characters
Not surprised Hindley distorted. I think this one had a lot more hate within him than the original
RIP Isabella Linton, I mean Isabella Edgar. She found someone who wasn't Heathcliff and her brother STILL stopped talking to her, and ended up being used by Erlking Heathcliff anyway
Speaking of Linton (Edgar). I don't have much to say because if I'm being honest I don't like him very much and everything he said was kinda overshadowed by his absolutely disgusting death. Catherine saying he looked like a prince out of a fairytale is very interesting considering how much he looks like the Black Swan guys
I'm sad Josephine died. It makes narrative sense but it would’ve been funny if she outlasted everyone else just like in the book
Cathy! There's a lot to say about Cathy but I'm not sure I can be the one to do it. I like her. I'm glad she was fucked up and we got our "everyone sucks here, you're perfect for each other, never involve anyone else in your business" but of course other people are getting involved because this is fucking Wuthering Heights
SPEAKING OF GETTING INVOLVED! NELLY!! I'm sooo glad they gave her the unreliable narrator trait, and managed to put the whole "burning letters" thing in there too. I'm also glad that when she did inevitably betray the team, she stayed exactly the same in personality. It's like she said herself, the happy moments in the past were real. I hope she stops associating with Hermann and goes to do something else with her life. Imagine finding out that in every universe you're wrapped up in Heathcliff and Cathy's bullshit
no Hareton or Catherine II, but Catherine I and Heathcliff did a fine job breaking the cycle themselves, I think.
there's probably more things to say about the Erlking and the Wild Hunt but I'm so tired
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save-the-villainous-cat · 1 year ago
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a hero that’s forced to kneel in front of villain??🤨🤨😏😏😏 (I know it’s kinda cliché but still a classic)
“Don’t make me sad,” the villain said. “Don’t make this worse.”
The hero stared at them with burning eyes, with ignited hatred. Once, they’d been something close to friends, somehow close to solving these problems together and bring peace to the city.
What a fucking joke that was. Betrayal could cut deep, the hero was fully aware of that but the villain giving them hope, making promises to work together and looking at them the way they did, didn’t only cut deep but truly severed.
“Kneel,” the villain said softly. And the hero didn’t really have a choice, did they? With the mayor and the superhero taken as hostages, they would vault the villain into a position on top of the food chain if they didn’t obey.
Killing political figures was usually not the villain’s approach. They rather became them by weaselling their way into politics. But if these two died, the entire city would burn. Killing the most powerful superhero in the city and murdering the human responsible for managing it? It was like killing the queen and checking the king.
So, the hero didn’t have a choice. Their actions could prevent a war.
The hero got down on one knee, eyes boring into the hard concrete beneath their feet. Nothing of it had been real and the hero hated themselves for their naïveté.
Why had the villain saved them that night? Why had they stitched their wounds messily? Why had they brought them to the hospital before fleeing into the dark? Giving them painkillers? Hell, putting their cape around the hero’s shoulders?
It didn’t make any sense to the hero and it stung, upsetting their muscles, torturing their heart…
Curiously, humiliation wasn’t part of this. They only felt like they’d lost someone close to them.
Which wasn’t even the truth.
“Look at me.” The villain lifted the hero’s chin with their index finger gently. “No matter what happens, look at me.”
The hero didn’t understand. Their brows knitted together but they didn’t break the eye contact with the villain, looking at their sharp features which only softened in the light of dawn. All of this, so the city could survive. The hero was quite aware that they were the only one to change the city’s fate.
One wrong word and the villain would cut their throats and with that, conjure chaos.
“Do you hate me now?” the villain asked. One thumb brushed over the hero’s bottom lip. “Do you want to kill me?”
“No,” the hero said.
“Answer truthfully. Do you want me dead?”
The hero paused, thinking about that. No, they didn’t want the villain to die, they didn’t want anyone to die. Yes, the hero loathed them for the things they’d done. Breaking their heart like that, leaving them to wonder if things could’ve been different if they’d made a different decision.
“…no,” the hero said. They still looked at the villain, stared into their eyes. In this moment, they seemed as tender as they’d been when they’d rescued the hero. “I don’t want anyone to die.”
“Do you think you could forgive me for the things I’ve done?”
The hero thought about that too.
Fuck, they probably could. Although they were angry and frustrated, they knew they forgave easily. When they thought too much about it, put themselves into someone else’s shoes a little too desperately…
“Yes, I could. Probably.”
The villain waited.
“Okay,” they said. “Kill them both.”
The hero’s eyes widened and they wanted to yank their head towards the mayor and the superhero but the villain’s grip on their chin hardened, commanding them with a gaze to keep looking.
“I’ll take care of you.” The villain wiped one of the hero’s tears away. “Don’t worry, sweetheart. You can stay with me.”
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scribiel · 9 months ago
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NIGHTIANGLES
Jujutsu Kaisen! Satoru Gojo x fem! reader
tags: Satoru Gojo x fem! reader, angst, illicit affairs, forbidden relationship, cheating, reader and satoru had a forbidden relationship, set up in a higher society, written in letter form/epistolary
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To you, who sat beneath the gleaming golden sunlight; 
Implicit because it was all nothing but illicit.
To you, my other half,
I always thought living in lowkey was never the key. I loved writing in capital letters, shouting and screaming, declaring in high volumes, painting with bright colors. I loved the spotlight. But everything changed once I met you at the auction. It was supposed to stop there. Right after I won it. But we met again at the charity event, and all I knew was your parents had set you up with someone else. Same with mine. A typical thing that happened in an elite society.  
And then at the masquerade. Beautiful room colliding with those beautiful blue horizon wide glassy eyes of yours was something I wasn’t prepared for. It all began again with a simple dance and small talk; coffee or tea; hot or cold turned into a cascade of events. Including the ‘I didn’t know my soon-to-be-fiance-picked-by-my-parents would be there too’ event. I ran outside because he was calling me a whore for dancing with you (even though he called me in private, it still broke my heart). Then, fate arranged for us to meet at the garden. How you gave me your tux because it was cold, I was cold. You threw these stupid jokes about how ugly his nose was, how bad his tux was, how I could’ve had someone better than him. And I laughed.
You made me laugh.
We met again. Un or fortunately, we met too many times. We got too comfortable with each other.  How your hands sent me condolences because I was stupidly fighting with my boyfriend, turned into the hands who gave me affection, scrutiny to check all my underlying injuries, and the hands that should’ve never held me. 
The night you made me yours, marked me permanently, was also the night I hoped time could’ve stood still. I hoped the comfort you gave me wouldn’t be washed away in the morning. You should know, when you spinned me around in your apartment, and then you pressed the longest kiss into my temples, whispered, “I wanna marry you.”
It was also the moment you lit up all my hopes, built my dreams, and started a war between love and duty. So I laughed. “Do you think it will be possible?”
And you said it, certainly, “I’d give anything in my power to make you mine. I swear this to you.”
Oh Satoru, that moment made me sure that I could give everything up for you, for us. I could’ve ripped my heart out and put it in your hands as an evidence of love. But we kept going in spite of the disagreement from everyone. Threats after threats, we kept knitting our threads of love in the dark. Where no one could see, could notice. But for once, I was okay to live in a lowkey, write in lowercase, whisper as declaration, and paint with pale colors. I hated the spotlight, because that was the only place I shouldn’t be seen with you. Every glance we made in between the crowds, every time our hands brushed against each other, every casual ‘oh-I-ran-into-you-at-the-parking-lot’ … they were all implicit silent forms of affection. I hoped the crowds, the mass, my and your parents wouldn’t notice the sparkles in the air, and the moment our eyes lit up each time they met. 
Terrifying, how I wanted to reach someone who bathed under such beautiful light, but the world had forbidden me to reach it. To reach you. So in the end, my hands were tied. I was so scared that what if I couldn't have done anything but watched love slip beyond our reach. I watched you, love, and us slipped away. But you firmly said, “That’s not gonna happen, I won’t let it.”
My fears turned into nightmares. I had nightmares about losing you, so I prayed. All the sacred prayers only because I was scared to lose you, to lose all my sweet dreams. But I forgot that nightmares were dreams as well. All my sacred prayers brought me nothing but nightmares turned into realities. And my hopes were burned, turned into ashes. 
I grasped everything that was left (I would never return your sweater that you left in my apartment), I wanted to hold it for the rest of my life. I held it every night, searching and reminiscing about you. 
Losing my chances, all my dreams and hopes were buried deep by the avalanche the moment I heard you got married. So then I sat on the floor, and came to realize that all those hopes, those fairytales that kept me awake at night with shimmering hopes upon my eyes were sung by the nightingales. They would never be heard when the sun came up, only meant to be a folktale to nobody but us, the lovers in the night. 
Even now, your sweater is the only thing that gets me through the night, the thing that I keep like a sacred oath. 
P.s. Do memories flow into your brain each time you call your daughter? If they do, then you are forever cursed for naming your only daughter after me.
From me, who wanted to bath beneath the gleaming golden sunlight with you; 
From me, your other half
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chiefdirector · 2 years ago
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Skinny Love (just last the year) | Logan Howlett | X-Men
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Soulmate au: shared marks
Tw: self harm, illness, eventual death, and suicidal thoughts
The concept of soulmates had fascinated scientists across the Earth for many millennia. The fact that two souls can be bound across plains of space and decades of time led some to fall into religious answers and some into doubt about the whole ordeal. How can you be fated to someone who hasn’t been born? It is fate or is it an entity controlling everyone, everywhere
Those who followed religion found comfort in the unknown, because of their soulmate is God’s will, how can I be wrong?
The doubters, or realists as they would have you know, say that it by chance you’ll see someone with the same mark because fate, nor luck or fortune, could predict
Logan was a realist.
He knew that the world was not giving, kind, or pleasing; it wasn’t even cold, demanding, or abusive: the world was indifferent. It didn’t care if you lived or died, or in the manner you did as such. It didn’t care if you laugh, cried, or something in between. The Earth didn’t care if you had a soulmate, it didn’t care at all.
The little mark on his wrist had been there from before Logan could remember. He had been told that he was one of the lucky ones, as humanity progressed, soulmates became more sparse and therefore more enchanting. Once, Logan had marvelled at the fact that someone could be his in all ways but as he grew older (and slowed aging at the same time) he had come to think that they had already passed and gone.
On particularly lonely nights, he fruitlessly clawed at the little constellation on his wrist, the pain bringing a sick comfort in place of what he needed from his soulmate.
Some nights, as much as it goes against his entire being, he thinks that he would’ve been better off if he hadn’t met his soulmate. Then he would be able to go back to the fickle loneliness he once resented as he knew that it was paradise compared to what was coming for him.
The eventual meeting of his soulmate had shocked Logan to his core, he had given up and accepted that he would die alone. And then they came.
They came and changed everything Logan had ever known: up was down, left was right, yellow was blue. But he couldn’t accept it so he ran as far as he could.
God did he wish that he hadn’t run.
Maybe if he knew how much time they had together he would’ve stayed and made the most of the extra weeks. Maybe he would’ve noticed the tiredness and nausea sooner, maybe he could’ve gotten them to the doctor sooner, then maybe, just maybe, they wouldn’t be terminal. He might’ve saved them.
After the nausea and fatigue eventually developed into vomiting and more hours being spent asleep than awake. The sickness caused their muscle mass to deteriorate like sand slipping through a timer. They were slowly being taken from him, and he was helpless to do nothing but watch.
Hank had said that he could try and find a cure for this mystery disease as doctors began to refuse treatment, saying that their symptoms lead to nothing. They abandoned them as he once did and he’d be damned if someone would leave them in their time of need.
Hank had said that he could find someone, and it would be done in the early days of the new year. He had said that they needed to hold on just a little bit longer.
So Logan found himself praying to a God he knew found no faith in, in hopes that if anyone, anywhere, could help his Love that they would. He swore to every god and goddess he could name that he would give anything, including himself, for her to survive this. He vowed to be a faithful servant for the rest of his days, he vowed to do anything on Earth. But he received no response.
He then took to their bedside, whispering his solemn prayers, their hand in his as he repeated his invocation and repented all of his wrongs. He did this as if they could save himself as if they were the only Divine being he believed in.
The days trailed on, and Logan watched as his soulmate grew weaker, wasting away in front of his eyes. Logan could remember the nights when watching them grew too painful and how he longed for the days when he resented the little constellation on his wrist but as he watched the gently rise and fall of their chest, he knew that he would suffered through ever gruellingly painful memory over and over again if it meant that he could see them smile like they used too.
“Come on,” he found himself whispering into their hand as he clutched them tight. “Come on. Don’t leave me.”
Christmas came and went, Logan barely noticed. He had stuck up a crappy little tree with lights that barely worked just in case they woke up long enough to notice. In better health, they would’ve chastised Logan for his lack of holiday spirit; he could hear their voice in the back of his head. Oh, how he longed to be scolded by them once again, if only to hear their voice without the deathly rattle that came out when they breathed.
“Come on.” He found himself pleading once again. “Come on. Just last the year and it’ll all be better. You’ll be better. You just need to hold on a little longer. Please.”
But not even Hank could reverse the irreversible. Logan watched as Hank came just a few hours late. He was still grasping their hand as he burst in. Watching the colour drain from Hank’s face was worse than watching her last breath as this made her death real. It cemented it in a reality in which Logan didn’t want to live.
If he could, he would’ve joined her in the stars. Logan had lived many lives and he never knew that something was the last time until it’s already gone and passed. And by that point he was already begging for the moment to come back.
Masterlist
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specialagentlokitty · 2 years ago
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Clara x reader - past and present
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May I please request a Clara x time lord reader (platonic) where the reader is still traumatised by the time war, and Clara slowly helps the reader open up. And reader sees Clara as a sister figure? - Anon💜
Looking at the human standing by the console of your TARDIS, you frowned a little as you walked down the steps towards her.
“Shouldn’t humans be sleeping at this time?” You asked.
“Shouldn’t you?” She replied.
You hummed a little, leaning against the railing.
“I don’t need to sleep like you do. So, why’re you awake Clara?” You asked.
“Just couldn’t sleep to be honest.” She sighed.
You nodded and gestured for her to come sit on the steps with you, and she did.
She walked over and sat down, covering her mouth to hide a little yawn.
“Do you ever find yourself awake, wondering what you could do different?” She asked.
You flicked your gaze to her.
“Is this about what happened yesterday? With that small planet?”
“I just… I feel like if we’d done something different we could’ve saved it…” she mumbled.
You sighed, standing up.
Offering Clara your hand, you waited for her to take it, and when she did, you pulled her to the doors of the TARDIS and opened it.
Stepping out into the cool night air, you dropped her hand and turned your attention to the starry sky, admiring the beauty of it.
“What do you see when you look at this sky Clara?” You asked.
She looked up as well.
“Stars, planets. Places we’ve probably been too.” She replied.
“Exactly, but there’s so much more than that out there Clara. Humanity has spent its whole life using these very stars to guide them, to teach them. But they don’t know what’s behind those stars, they don’t know what happens up there, what has happened up there.”
You turned to face her.
“Maybe we could have done something differently, but fate always finds a way to come back to fix what was stopped. That planet, even if we could’ve saved it would have been destroyed one day. There’s nothing we could’ve done to stop that, one day every planet in the universe will be gone, and maybe new ones will take its place, maybe they won’t, we can’t be sure.”
Clara frowned a little bit.
“We can only change so much Clara, we can only stop so much. Some things are out of our control, and no matter how hard we beg and plead and think and plan and go about it again and again nothing will ever change the past.”
Clara’s eyes softened, because she realised what you were talking about.
She’d asked before, of course she had, she was curious, and she had heard the doctors side of it, but she wanted to hear your side of it.
But you never spoke about it.
Not until now.
“War, death, pain, sadness, loss, all these things are what makes life so important. Without any of these things you would never truly experience the beauty to living.”
“But don’t you wish you could change things?” She asked.
You laughed softly, nodding your head.
“Of course I do. I have so much I wish I could change, do differently, bring back, but I can’t.
You walked back into the TARDIS and up the stairs, sitting on one of the chairs and Clara followed you, closing the door and up the steps to sit on the chair opposite you.
She looked at the way you stared at your hands.
“It’s not your fault.” She said softly.
You looked at her.
“You don’t know that, you know nothing about what happened, what has happened and what will happen.”
“Then tell me.”
You sighed.
“What’s there to tell?”
“If you know how things end, why do you still try change it?”
You looked at her, resting your chin on your hand.
“I have seen things you could never dream of seeing. Seen things that you wouldn’t want to see for they’d put you into an early grave, this I have had no control over, unable to change. I have experienced the past, and I have learned about the future, these things will never change, no matter how hard we try to fight to stop that from happening.”
Clara listened carefully.
“I do what I do for peace, for justice. To help those who cannot help themselves for greed and selfishness, so no one has to experience what I experienced during the time war.”
You sighed.
“I know I will forever be haunted by those memories, staring at a face I will never recognise, hear a voice that does not sound like mine. But I know those are my memories though I may be a different version of myself, I will always remain me, with those memories. The doctor likes to pretend he doesn’t remember, as does the Master, but I am not like that. I make sure I remember, I make sure to remember those names and faces of the people I knew, because without that, the legacy of the time lords will die, regardless if a few are still about, without remembering those people who did not make it what is the point?”
“To get better.” She said.
“No. That is ignorance Clara, if you ignore certain memories and choose to remember others, all those who died will be forgotten, no one will sing their songs, tell their stories.”
You got up.
“Follow me.”
Clara wordlessly followed you, and you took her down the confusing hallways until you stopped at a large door and pushed it open.
You let her walk in first and stood behind you.
“It’s the library?” She asked.
“No, it’s not. Look closer.”
Clara walked over to one of the shelves and looked at the books on it.
“This is my archive, the archive of civilisations, cultures, planets, people who have passed their time. The universe may have forgotten them, but I have not. So long as I live, their memories will live on, that is the burden I bare. The cross I choose the hold.”
You walked over to a large book locked behind glass, and placed your hand on it.
“This is all that is left of the time lords. The names of all those who died in the war, every single one. I spent years writing it out, so they may live in in my head, so they never died in vein.”
You turned to Clara.
“Pain is a part of life, no matter how many lives you may experience, you must remember the pain my dear Clara, otherwise you become reckless and you don’t stop to admire the beauty of what you see.”
Clara nodded her head and you smiled softly, walking over you placed a hand on her shoulder, turning your head to look at her.
“Remember, it’s okay to feel bad emotions, you just need to give yourself time to process them.”
“Is that what you did?”
Clara followed behind you and you put your hands in your pockets.
“Yes, why do you think I’ve never had a companion?”
“Oh, that makes sense. Then why did you choose me?”
You stopped.
“Well, at first it was because you had already travelled with a time lord, I didn’t need to explain everything to you.”
She nodded her head and started to walk ahead of you.
“Now, it’s because I see you as a sister…” you whispered.
You watched as Clara left and you smiled to yourself, walking back to your room as you sat on your sofa, grabbing the book you were reading.
You thought having a human with you would be annoying and tiring, but you had grown to enjoy her company and the help she offered.
You had almost forgotten what it was like to have to company of someone else, having spent years alone but Clara had changed that
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destinygoldenstar · 11 months ago
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Responding To Ninjago Hot Takes (Round One)
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Hey, remember the post I made asking people for Ninjago Hot Takes?
No?
Links here
I said I was gonna respond to some, so well, here we are. I’ll just do a post per hot take, cause some of these I have way too much to say, and I want to shout out people who made these in the first place. (Please support these people, even if you don’t agree with what they said.)
I’m going to repeat this for every post: I’m going to approach these hot takes in two ways: How hot I think they are as takes, and whether or not I agree with the take. Know that I’m just using both of these to reflect on others opinions, which is always fun to see, and I will try to be as respectful as possible to the person. (You guys be respectful too) And as always reblog some of your hot takes in either this post or the other one, preferably the other one.
So I’m gonna go from oldest reblog and onward.
@favesgrave
They said:
‘i might get burnt at the stake for saying this but i think llorumi is the straight version of catradora (disclaimer: i don't like either ships)’
‘harumi manipulates lloyd, toys with him, tries killing him and his friends multiple times, yadda yadda yadda, but eventually turns good (i cant remember how or why i havent watched crystallized in a while)’
‘catra does the same exact thing to adora!!! and also nearly destroys the world and is the reason glimmer's mom is dead and everyone's chill with that??? but then at the end catra comes out with the "i love you i always have!!!!" and everything's okay’
‘yeah harumi and lloyd dont get together at the end but people sure ship them still’
Yeah. I definitely agree with this.
For me, the whole point of this ship was that it was a toxic ship in the Oni Trilogy. You’re SUPPOSED to say ‘Yeah, this will never work and this is unhealthy’.
And I loved hating it for that reason. These two characters became such good rivals as a result. And it definitely makes you hate Harumi for all the personal torment she’s done to Lloyd. Toying with his feelings, turning his father against him, forcing him to watch his friends supposedly DIE?!?
Like, I was so angry when Sons of Garmadon ended on a cliffhanger (because I was unused to change and was an idiot). I was furious that this lady got away with all of it!
The point of the ship was that it was a lie and she’s toying with him. Like, convince me in any way that Lloyd is not the victim here.
BUUUUUT then Crystalized came in as a pure fan service season that decided to fix something that was NOT BROKEN.
I usually appreciate the writers actually taking time to listen to criticism and attempting to take it to heart and fix issues audiences had in later installments. (Not everything, but what can you do?) It’s why I can respect the shows heart more than anything else. They care about their audience and are willing to admit when they messed up somewhere.
There were people who demanded that Harumi be redeemed though, and honestly, I think listening to those people was a bad call. Because it only ruined the entire character.
I wouldn’t say it ruined Sons of Garmadon and Hunted for me, but yeah, the best headcanon I can think is that Harumi got possessed or something when she was revived cause she is just flat out not the same character in this season.
I think what got to me the most was that she did not EARN redemption or convince me in any way.
The big thing that redeemed her was a few moments where she doubted her place and Lloyd’s fate, and realizing the Overlord made the snake that killed her family. The latter is the big thing that makes her switch sides and attack the Overlord. Which, that could’ve easily been read as self preservation. But no it’s ‘her switching sides’.
We don’t even get an aftermath for her switching sides. Lloyd just says “She’s on our side now” and nothing else is done. She doesn’t even apologize! For goodness sake!
Like yeah, I can definitely understand people being angry at this.
Lloyd went out of his way to help his abuser. Someone who destroyed his life at one point and gave him PTSD from all of that. PTSD that prevented him from stepping out of his friend group and trusting others for a long time. And they treat it like the problem was that Lloyd didn’t consider ‘how to redeem her’. No. The burden is NOT on you to make things right in this scenario. The burden is on THEM.
So yes. I can definitely agree with this. I guess the only thing is that maybe it could’ve worked if there was another draft involved in the editing room, and I can’t deny it was good in the Oni Trilogy.
Idk how spicy of a take this is. Because I’ve seen others say the same things I’m saying. So I don’t think this take is all that unpopular. I’ve seen it everywhere all the time. But I guess to Llorumi shippers it’s a hot take.
I’ll give you a 4 for the Spiciness.
I’ll give you an 8 for the Agreement.
Anyone else want to say your hot takes? Reblog them on the original post!
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hiraeth-witch-11 · 2 years ago
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Bond to Happen Part 12
Part 12: Most definitely not a date... Right?
Warnings: magical violence, pain, some fluff to add balance
Word count: 4100ish
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“A Greek myth, Matt? I’ve never heard of these in real life and I studied this shit in college,” you admit apprehensively.
“Look at the characteristics of them, Blue. They all have to do with fate and it’s not just Greek, there are almost identical representations in Norse mythology and parallels across a half dozen cultures. The core of your power, when everything else is stripped away and you are almost on empty, is the future. You add in some energy and then you are someone who manipulates fate by changing the future.”
“I agree they look really similar, but nothing in here helps with my feeding or focus. It even says the Fates were all different. What can I do with that?”
“I have an idea, but you aren’t going to like it,” Matt warns. You grimace but motion for him to continue. He explains and you find he was right. You don’t like it.
“Are you crazy, Matt? I am not going to the Witch Bureau of Investigation and asking them nicely to check for me,” you say heatedly.
“New York has some protections in place to encourage magic users to seek help if they need it. I wouldn’t let you walk into it blind. No pun intended.”
“You’re hilarious, Murdock. I trust you and your skills as a lawyer, but this is the exact opposite of what I’ve been doing for the last few years. What if they do realize I’m something more and try to sell me off to some middle aged business man or a senile senator?”
“They’ve had your blood on file for some time now, they could’ve done that already,” he quips.
“Not funny.”
“Then Foggy and I will tie them up in so much paperwork, we’ll have years to get you out of it,” he says seriously. “Just think about it.”
You agreed, but ended up putting the idea on the back burner as you procrastinated your decision. Billy was a welcome distraction.
*******
“It’s not a date, Karen.”
“Is he driving?”
“Yeah, I don’t have a car.”
“That’s beside the point. Is he paying?”
“I tried to, but he pre bought the tickets.”
“Are you getting food?”
“I don’t know, probably.”
“If he pays for your food and opens doors for you, it’s a date.”
“He does that all the time though, Karen. I think it’s just the way he is.”
Karen hums over the phone.
“Go ahead and say whatever it is you’re holding back.” You know her well enough to understand what that noise means.
“Honey, I told you he has a thing for you. Have you considered that he treats you that way all the time because he wants to date you?”
“Billy doesn't really do ‘dating’, Kare.”
“Maybe he was just waiting for the right person.”
“Maybe,” you concede. “If he doesn’t call it a date, I’m not going to assume it’s a date. That’s only going to set me up for disappointment.”
“Fair enough. For the record, I still think you are in denial.”
You groan and mutter, “I like him, Kare. If he asks me on a date, I plan to say yes, does that answer your question.”
“I know how hard it was for you to say that out loud and I’m proud of you,” Karen teases.
“Hardy-har-har.” You allow silence to settle for a moment before tentatively asking, “Has he said anything to Frank about it?”
“Not that I know of.”
“Alright, I should probably go get dressed.”
“I want all the details tomorrow morning. As long as you don’t have company, of course.”
“Karen! I’m not the type of gal to put out on the first date!” Not that there was anything wrong with that, of course. It’s just that you are still working on taking baby steps and sex would be a giant fucking leap for you right now.
“So it IS a date!” Karen cackles over the phone as you hang up on her in exasperation. She immediately Face-Times you back and you accept the call, listening as she immediately begins talking again. “What are you going to wear?”
“I was thinking of the forest green ¾ sleeves top and my black jeans. And my lucky boots.”
“The top with the V-neck and the ¾ sleeves that are flowy at the end?”
“Yup.”
“Get dressed and then show me.”
You stick your tongue out at the phone and set it face down as you change. Once you are ready, you angle the phone so she can get a full body view.
“Twirl for me,” she insists and you roll your eyes as you comply. “Your ass looks great in those jeans.”
“It does, doesn’t it? These are actually super comfy, which is why I picked them.”
“Of course, definitely no ulterior motive. And the shirt that shows most of your sternum is just comfy too?”
“It does not! It looks good on me and is perfect for the weather today.”
“Mmhmm.”
“And yes, it does show off my boobs, are you happy now?”
“I’m wondering how many times you’ll catch Russo staring today,” Karen snickers.
*******
Billy meets you at your apartment and the two of you walk down to his car. He opens the passenger door for you and closes it once you are inside. You give yourself a little shake of the head, trying to rein in your thoughts. It wouldn’t do you any good to read too much into the action.
"You look nice, by the way," Billy says as he drives.
"So do you," you respond somewhat awkwardly, but Billy doesn't seem to mind. Contrary to Karen's belief, he keeps his eyes on your face when he speaks to you. You don't catch him ogling you even once. Are you disappointed? Maybe a little. It would be nice to have some sort of confirmation that he finds you physically attractive.
After a relatively quick drive the two of you are at one of the biggest zoos nearby.
“You know, I’ve lived here for over 2 years and I’ve never come here before,” you admit to Billy.
“I thought you loved animals? I’ve caught you with the Discovery channel on in your office like a dozen times!” 
“I always wanted to, I just never ended up following through,” you shrug.
“I’ve come here so many times, I’ve lost count. Allow me to give you a tour?” Billy offers with a dramatic sweep of his hand as he offers it to you. He doesn’t seem to mind that it takes you a moment to decide to take it. Honestly, you half expected him to pull away. But he didn’t, instead, he wrapped his fingers around yours, practically dwarfing your hand with his own. It had been a long while since you’d held someone’s hand like this. You’d almost forgotten how nice it was.
“What’s your favorite animal?” Billy asks as he leads you through the plaza and towards the rhinos.
“Right now, probably big cats, maybe some sort of jaguar.” Lately you’d been seeing the black furred predator more and more in your dreams.
For some reason Billy chuckles. “Yeah, why a jaguar?”
You answer honestly as you observe the rhinos grazing. “I think I’ve been dreaming about one. It’s hard to tell though, I never get a clear view. Made me curious about them.”
“Fair enough,” Billy says, humor still evident in his voice.
“Did you know that they have ridiculous jaw strength? They can crush through bone easily. It’s super impressive,” you gush. “They’re also the best swimmers of all big cats- which I think is adorable to watch- they even fish!”
“You’re cute when you get excited.” Billy’s words make you blush and you look away from the exhibit in front of you to find him watching you again with that complex look in his eyes. Affection, sure. Amusement, yup. But there’s something distorted about it, possessive almost. You realize you’re staring and look away, dragging him by the hand to keep moving.
“Let’s go! This zoo is huge, we need to pick up the pace if we’re gonna see all of it before it closes!”
******
“That’s not even how it works though!” You’re giggling at the look on Billy’s face.
“Nope, I don’t believe you. I’ve watched enough movies to know that you can hypnotize snakes with music,” he insists, folding his arms and looking up at the floor counter as the elevator takes you to your apartment.
“This is why people say Marines eat crayons, William,” you tease as the doors open.
His jaw drops and he looks at you in exaggerated offense. “That is an awful rumor that there is absolutely no truth to.”
“Really?” You raise an eyebrow at him as the two of you walk towards your apartment door. “I’m sorry, I gotta be honest. You and Frank are scary smart at what you’re good at, but there are some things you are completely clueless about.”
“Just because I don’t get all your niche pop culture references, doesn’t make me clueless.” Billy rolls his eyes.
“I had to explain what a frappuccino is to Frank the other day. And you thought the most recent Taylor Swift album was Red, the stolen version.”
“There’s different versions?”
“We had a whole conversa- oh, you're joking. You’re lucky, I was about to give you the whole explanation again.”
“I remember enough to not bring up Jake Gyllenhal or John Mayer in your presence.”
“I’m proud of you, maybe you can be taught.”
“I will have you know that I learn things very quickly, sweetheart.”
“Ahuh, and how many times have I shown you the difference between posting a story or a post on Instagram?”
“More than once, but that’s not fair, they keep changin’ where all the buttons go. How am I s’posed to keep up with that?”
“Sure, Russo. Whatever you need to tell yourself so you can sleep at night.” You punch in the code to your apartment and turn the key. You turn to say good night to Billy and he’s much closer than you expected.
“Today was really fun, Billy, thank you.” Don’t look at his lips. Don’t look at his lips. Shit, why do they have to look so soft. Look away. Maintain eye contact. Why is he looking at me like that? Why hasn’t he said anything yet?
“I had a really good time, sweetheart. We should do something like this again soon.”
Did he just look at my lips? Is that something I want? I thought I did, but right now I’m not sure. This is a lot of pressure. Oh gods, what if I’m bad at kissing after all these years?
You don’t know what you want at this moment and you’re grateful that you don’t have to find out. 
“Goodnight, Blue,” he says, leaning forward and pressing a barely there kiss to your forehead. Your stomach flips, but it’s not a bad feeling and you have to keep yourself from leaning forward when he leaves.
“Goodnight, Billy.”
*******
A handful of days later and things had only gotten worse. Your head was so gods damned sensitive these days that you had to take max strength sleeping pills to be able to quiet it down enough to ignore the constant buzzing of the people who lived in your apartment building. The bags under your eyes were now noticeable, even with the eye cream Karen had given you 6 months ago when you started at Anvil. You were exhausted and practically used to your temples throbbing whenever you were around others outside of your friend group. Coffee was now becoming a twice daily thing, which wasn’t good. Magic was already slipping your control subconsciously and being caffeinated made you twitchy.  You were browsing through some delivery options on Friday during your fourth month when there was a knock on your door.
“Come in.”
Russo opens the door, holding two bags of what smelled like chinese take out.
“I thought we could eat lunch together today? I grabbed some of your favorites after my last meeting,” he says, not waiting for an answer as he sits down across from you.
“You really didn’t have to do that,” you say.
Russo gives you a look and you quickly tack on,”But I appreciate it and it smells good, so sure.”
“How’s your head been?” Billy asks as you start eating
“It’s been alright,” you lie, shrugging.
Billy raises an eyebrow at that. 
“Nothing I can do to fix it so it is what it is,” you insist. Nothing you can do by yourself anyways.
“What helps? Would work from home days be better? Shorter work days?”
“The apartment is about the same. There are still a lot of people around me, even though we are separated by walls and floors.” you shake your head, you might as well be in person if things are going to suck either way. Anvil was where Billy was during the day and that made going to work worthwhile. Most days.
“Is that why you look like you haven't slept?”
“Gee, thanks, that's what every gal wants to hear,” you say sarcastically as he continues to look at you expectantly. “Yes. It’s still loud at night and I've been having trouble sleeping because of it. I’ve got some meds for it though, so it should be fine.”
Billy leans back and looks at you for a few moments while you eat. Your head was always so much quieter when he was around. His aura didn’t irritate your magic like most people’s. In fact, it almost seemed to provide a protective barrier. Not that you’d ever say that out loud. Not that you’d ever let yourself think about the implications. No, you would keep that fact tucked neatly into a box with all the other things you refuse to think about.
“I have a couple leads I could follow up on that may help. With your permission, I want to look into them,” Billy says seriously.
“Why?” You ask, fully surprised. Russo shrugs.
“Consider part of your health benefits. You’re good at what you do and I don’t want to have to look for a replacement if these symptoms get too much for you.”
“I don’t know about that, Russo,” you hesitate. Anything that would have the strength and precision to help with your situation would be difficult to find and make, along with ridiculously expensive.
“You’re also my friend. I care about you. Let me do this for you, sweetheart.” He’s leaning forward and looking at you with those big brown eyes of his, currently filled with concern. You don’t think you’d ever get used to how beautiful he was, sometimes it’s too much to look at him.
“Okay,” you agree softly. If it would help you be able to breathe, it was worth it.
*******
Occasionally he would be out of the office for a few days, usually leaving Frank in charge. On one such occasion, both of them were out for the day and you were supposed to do a seeing for a lower risk job and a team you were mostly well acquainted with. The only person you had yet to meet was a new hire.
You check the time on your phone and shuffle your way out of your office and down to the main floor of Anvil. You rarely did seeings in your office; only a handful of people had ever actually gone into your office and you preferred to keep it that way, especially after the Harding fiasco. Hopping off the last step, you head towards the B team, dressed up and ready for their protection detail of some senator’s daughter. You’d done a preliminary check when they were originally assigned and everything had gone well. But you insisted on double checking before they left, especially since the new guy had been assigned.
“Are you all ready for last checks?” You ask to get their attention. The team was made of 2 men, 2 women, and the new guy who was technically shadowing today. They nod and you begin running through the protocol for the benefit of Max Stevens, the new team member. 
“Hi Max, everyone calls me Blue, we haven’t gotten the chance to work together yet so I’ll show you how we do things with the others first.”
Max gives a firm nod and watches you carefully.
“Y’all already know what to do. Dominant hand out, palm down. Any gloves should be removed. Before I make contact, it’s important to take deep breaths and try to either clear your mind, or focus it on something grounding, like the ocean or something. I’ll touch your hand with mine for just a couple seconds and move on. You might feel a warmth or other sensation, but it’ll be small and it won’t hurt. It’ll be gone once I let go. Any questions?”
Max shakes his head and you begin moving your way through the team. The job looked like it would move smoothly. Team lead Josie Smithson, then Bethany Villa, and John Michaelson. As you touched each team member, you had no notes. Finally it was time for Max . He holds out his hand, almost hesitantly. His aura flickering with something akin to anticipation.
“Ready?” You ask, making sure to have his consent. He nods firmly and you reach out to brush your fingertips against his skin. Immediately the feeling of pure hatred and rage is forced through you along with pain unlike anything you’d experienced in years.
And then you drop to the ground, writhing in pain as the feeling of being swarmed by an aggressive and focused aura hits you on full blast. You’re gasping, trying to breathe as the aura moves its way into your lungs. Black colors the edges of your vision. 
“Blue, what happened!?” Josie, the team lead, crouches by you, running her fingers over you without touching you, trying to sense where your injury is. “Get Stevens out of here, Michaelson, don’t let him out of your sight. Villa, call Castle and Russo now.”
You can barely track what’s happening as Max’s aura continues to assault you. John drags him out of the room and the sensation fades by half, enough that you can breathe, but not enough for you to be able to stand.
“Frank didn’t answer, but Russo is on his way. He should be here in 15, he’s on the bike,” Bethany tells Josie. 
“Blue, can I touch you?” Josie asks. You shake your head vigorously. Having her this close was already uncomfortable, something that made no sense considering you had just willingly touched her to check her future. 
“Okay, okay,” She says gently. “You are going to be okay. Breathe with me.” She talks you through some deep breathing and your body relaxes slightly. What originally felt like a swarm of angry fire ants coating your skin and lungs, was now reduced to pins and needles that only truly hurt when you tried to move. So you remain in the fetal position. 
“Villa, go help Michaelson. Cuff Stevens, if he isn’t already.” Josie stays by you, continuing her diagnostic process to monitor your heart. She technically was a witch, by the original definition at least, but because her ability was so specific, most just referred to her as a diff or differential. They didn’t deal with the same backlash as ‘real’ witches. “You’re doing good, Blue. Keep breathing, your heart rate is getting back into a good range and your blood pressure is almost normal. Russo will be here in under 10 minutes now. We’ll take care of this.”
It’s only been 6 minutes since you dropped according to the clock just within your sight line, but it felt like an age. Your muscles are exhausted and twitch randomly, sending spikes of pain through you. The sound of heavy, quick footsteps draws your attention from Jose, who suddenly stands and begins speaking to the new person outside of your view. At least their aura feels soothing, as upset as it is. You can’t exactly pinpoint the emotions in the aura, just generally ‘not good’ feelings. You wonder if you’re losing your touch. Maybe it’s just the pain.
“They were doing their seeing as usual and everything was fine until the second they made contact with Stevens. Blue dropped like she’d been shot. Her heart rate went sky high and so did her blood pressure. Stevens is with Michaels and Villa.” Josie says quickly.
A blurry figure crouches in front of you where Jose had been. Their blissfully cool aura washes over you fully. 
“Hey sweetheart, can you tell me what happened?” Billy says, careful not to speak too loud, as if he was worried he would scare you. The sight of him has you sighing in relief. You’re safe now.
You struggle to fully open your mouth with how tightly clenched your jaw is. Voice raspy with pain, you answer, “I’m not sure yet.” Another breath, avoiding his eyes and trying to focus. “Something about Max’s aura was intended to cause pain. I don’t know if it was his doing or not. ‘M sorry, it’s hard to think.”
Billy hesitates for a moment before asking,”Can you stand?”
You move your legs and wince, swallowing a cry. You shake your head.
“Can I touch you?” He asks. It’s your turn to hesitate as you assess both your magic and his aura. He’s closer than Jose was and so far that closeness has been soothing, not grating like Josie’s was. You nod slowly and he reaches for you. Your magic retreats once he touches you, allowing his aura to wrap more firmly around you as he scoops you into his arms. You wonder if he manipulates his aura on purpose, or if it was instinctual. Either way, you appreciate the break from the pain as you rest your head against his chest and close your eyes. 
Billy takes the two of you to the elevator and straight into the office, where he deposits you on his comfortable leather couch. The moment his hands leave your body, your skin begins to hurt again. The pain is almost gone, now like a bad sunburn, but you are so drained you really don’t want to move. But you should, so you force yourself to sit up.
“Easy, sweetheart. Take it slow,” Billy says, hands shooting up from his sides. 
“I’m already feeling better, Billy. It’s okay.” Your voice is rough and speaking rubs your throat like sandpaper. You turn to look towards the fridge, but Billy’s a step ahead of you and grabs you a water before you can ask. He even opens it for you.
“Thanks,” you say sincerely before practically guzzling the bottle down. “I can’t tell if it was a magically based attack. It seems like he was aware of how to focus his aura and harnessed a very strong emotion to target it. He might’ve used herbs or some kind of supplement to boost it. I don’t know why he did it, but I’m almost certain he did it intentionally.” You share what you know like it’s another report, detaching your own feelings from it.
“Don’t worry about that, sweetheart, I’ll make him talk,” Billy says, his face darkening. You nod and finish off your water before standing. Too fast, and spots fill your vision. Billy doesn’t let you fall, though. He gently grasps your upper arms and directs you back to the couch. “You aren’t going anywhere until we get you checked out, okay.”
“I’ll be fine, Billy. I’ve been through worse, much worse, actually,” you half mutter to yourself.
“Josie thought you were about to have a heart attack, sweetheart. That’s not fine.”
“I bounce back quick, Russo, and I hate doctors. Ask Frank, I’ll be fine.” You try to sound as firm as possible. He cocks his head to the left and focuses his eyes on you to an almost uncomfortable degree. It’s like he sees through you and into your soul.
“Fine,” Billy says, like he’s tasting the word. “Do you have someone who can stay the night with you?”
“Uh, Karen and Frank have date night tonight as soon as he gets back. Matt is usually ‘occupied’ at night, and Foggy has been talking about spending the weekend with Marci since Monday. Kinda out of options. I really just need some sleep and food, Bill, I’ll-”
“If you say you’ll be fine one more time, I’ll put you on paid leave for a week,” Russo growls. A shiver runs up your spine at his voice. Damn, usually that tone doesn’t affect you so much. Then again, it’s never really been directed at you before.
“That really isn’t-”
“I can make it two weeks, Blue. Keep talking.” The corners of his mouth twitch upward when your mouth snaps shut. “I can stay with you tonight if you’re okay with that. I live in the same building anyway, so it makes sense.”
“Fine,” you agree quickly, wanting to end the conversation. You yawn, covering your mouth.
“I’m going to talk with Stevens. I’ll send Josie up to keep an eye on you. Take a nap if you want. I’ll take you home when I’m done.”
You nod your understanding and lean onto the side of the couch, closing your eyes instantly. Something warm is draped over you, but you barely notice because you are already falling asleep.
Series List
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Series Taglist: evyiione, @ellooo0ooo, intothesoul
Billy Russo Taglist: @snowkestrel, happydeanpotter, jvanilly
Everything Taglist: @kayhi808,
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my-journey-to-recovery · 2 years ago
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Are you Ready?
Welcome to my blog! Here you will find scattered thoughts and feelings as I journal through my journey to detox from my addiction of cocaine and alcohol. I’m writing anonymously so that I can write as frankly and honest as I want to without fear of repercussions. Any names mentioned here will have been changed to protect their anonymity also. 
Right, with that said here goes … A bit about me: 
I’m a 37 year old female currently living in a hostel due to a relationship breakdown. I got here about 5-6 months ago and whilst I was already drinking heavily I wasn’t doing any other drugs before I got here. 
Now, I do have a history of cocaine abuse which I had struggled with for about 5 years during my 20’s but got clean with the help of drop in rehab sessions. It’s important to say here that I had only been tempted once in the last 10+ years that I’d been clean - which was about 4 years ago whilst on a night out with my friends - I was drunk and got talking to my friend's boyfriend who told me he had some in his pocket and did I want some? Well of course I fucking wanted some! I’m an addict! So I slyly took the bag off him, went to the toilet of the pub we were in without my friends seeing, sat on the seat and stared at my old nemesis in the face. I opened the bag, dipped my pinky finger in and dabbed the white powder on my gums. I was buzzing! Something however, stopped me from going any further that night. The dab was enough. I placed the bag back in my pocket, gave it back to him and went for a cigarette to seriously consider what I had just done. I ended up going home that night proud that I hadn’t snorted it and told my then girlfriend what had happened. 
Fast forward to the beginning of this year whilst in the hostel and one fateful night when I came across my old friend cocaine again. I was in my neighbour’s room drinking and someone there had a bag. I remember being offered some and thinking fuck it. I don’t know whether it’s because my life is already a train wreck I thought I might as well or what but this time nothing could’ve stopped me from snorting it. 
It was fucking glorious. 
Not that I want to hype it up here or anything but I have to be honest, I loved it and well, there’s the danger - I instantly wanted more and more! So here I am, a few months into the new year with a relapse in my drug taking and continued issues with alcohol. 
I’ve been seeing a woman from my local ‘Recovery Network’ for a while about my drinking and I was honest with her a few weeks back about the recent coke use and she’s suggested I go for a stint in a detox centre. 
I have agreed. We did the referral yesterday and now I’m just waiting for a telephone assessment and a date to go in. I won’t lie, I’m shitting it. ‘Are you ready?’ she asked me. Truthfully? - No. I don’t think I am, BUT I have to change my circumstances in order to change my life. I cannot live in this hostel forever, nor would I want to. I need to get my life back on track so I am willing to try anything. 
Are you guys ready to go on this journey with me? 
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thechaoticfanartist · 2 years ago
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"we didn't kill him"
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gen
fandom: star wars
characters: obi-wan kenobi, grim kennet (oc)
relationship: obi-wan kenobi & grim kennet (oc)
post order 66, obi-wan is called ben, grim is called rue, mentioned anakin skywalker, angst
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summary:
what if grim told obi-wan the truth about anakin?
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“Dad, we need to talk,” Rue said quietly. She looked at him with broken eyes, and it seemed she had been crying not long earlier. Her voice almost trembled. 
 Ben looked at his daughter with concern, “is everything all right, Rue?”
 She didn’t reply. She just sat down across from Obi-Wan. “No, and you’re not going to like what I’m about to tell you.”
 “Rue?” He said concerned.
 “Ben, we didn't kill him,” she whispered quietly. 
 His heart almost dropped. She didn’t have to say his name. “What do you mean? You were there, you saw him burning. We killed him,” he denied. Just like when she had first told him Anakin had fallen. 
 “We didn’t see him die, though. We left him to die - well you did - but he didn’t die.”
 “And you have known, you knew this when it was happening.”
 “I did.”
 “You knew he would live, and you didn’t change that?”
 “I tried too at first, but you know how that went,” she replied. Referring to her metal arm.
 “But you had another chance again. You could have done it when he was burning. You could’ve ended it then.”
 “I was too angry. Ben, I went to kill him but when he was burning I couldn’t do it. Not because he was once my brother too, but because…I think part of me wanted him to suffer a fate worse than death.”
Ben didn’t know what to think about what Rue told him. “You knew,” he said again. Unable to say anything else. “You knew,” he repeated. “Why didn’t you tell me?” He was crying now.
 “I wanted to spare you the pain I live with.”
 “Spare me the pain?” He laughed a broken kind. “Rue I have lived thinking I killed my padawan for three years. That I killed him. Now you’re telling me I failed, that he’s alive, and suffering because of it? That you knew this the whole time, and did nothing about it. That you left him to suffer, when I left him to die.”
 “I’m sorry, Ben. Really I am, but there’s nothing that can be done now.”
 “No there isn’t,” Ben agreed. He bowed his head as more tears fell. “You knew. You knew and let it happen.”
 “I did.”
 “How many more people will Vader kill? How many has he killed since Mustafar?”
 “Countless.”
 “And you knew this.”
 “Yes.”
 “And you didn’t kill him?”
 “Yes.”
 “You knew what he would do still, and let him live knowingly?”
 “I did.”
 “Rue,” he said, looking at her through tear filled eyes. “What did you do?”
 “I…” she trailed off as she realized what Obi-Wan was saying. “I doomed so many people. So many worlds. In my own anger at one man…I doomed the galaxy.” She began to cry. “I’m so sorry.”
 “There’s nothing that can be done now.”
 “I suppose not. The past stays the same, it’s the future that is in motion.”
 “You should have told me sooner.”
 “I’m sorry.”
Tag List (let me know if you want to be added or removed) : @padme--amygdala @soclonely @mrfandomwars @jgvfhl @theleldaofzeldablog @milfspectre1 @togrutanduin @jedi-valjean @one-real-imonkey @traygaming @roseofalderaan @keoxus  @tranakin-thighhighwalker @veiled-in-stars @sentineljedi @spicysucculentz @purgetrooperfox @amelia-song-pond @kohtoyah @saturnsokas @thejediprincessqueenofnaboo
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theheadlessgroom · 2 years ago
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https://www.tumblr.com/beatingheart-bride/708116595459997696/theheadlessgroom-beatingheart-bride
@beatingheart-bride
Randall cast his head down bashfully when she commented on how glad she was he reached out to her that night (even if he went about it in an...unusual way, shall we say): Honestly, he too wished he could’ve gone about their first meeting in a much different way (had he know she would be so kind and accepting of him, he wouldn’t have jumped to the whole “Angel of Music” ruse), regretting how he tried to string her along with this charade (to say nothing of how he reacted when she unmasked him). He knew there was nothing he could do to change that, of course, but still, he had his regrets.
Again, there was no changing the past, and so he tried to set aside these thoughts in favor of basking in the glory of their friendship: Somehow, it really did feel as if they’d known each other forever, not just for a scant few months-it was amazing to think that their knowing one another had done so much for them, countering against the loneliness they’d felt for so long. It was sort of funny to think about, in hindsight-the two loneliest people in such a massive, oft-crowded opera house, had found one another.
“You’re...a very dear friend to me too,” he continued, resisting the urge to just...take her hands in his and endlessly wax poetic about the joy she brought to his life, instead fiddling with his bony fingers as he said, “I...I’m grateful every day to whoever brought the two of us together.” Whether it was fate, some higher power, or just complete happenstance, he was grateful to it for putting them in one another’s path.
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northern-loner · 1 year ago
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Thinking abt Jack Stauber’s “Rain” in the context of GenLoss, more specifically how it pertains to the audience and how we quite literally did everything possible with the power we were given in an attempt to save gl!Ranboo just like we were told we had to do from the start, and yet still being met with the crushing feeling of having to watch him die in the end. (By our own hand, no less)
Just like the Founder, the controllers in ShowFall’s ranks, and even other ccs have said: We played our part in all of this perfectly. There’s this sort of injustice to it all that despite the fact that we did everything we could’ve possibly done right, even playing into ShowFall’s hand arguably the most out of anyone else we meet, there was virtually nothing we could’ve done to change these people’s fates.
And despite all of our attempts to soften the blow of what’s been done; seeking comfort in the apparent inevitability of it all, pointing all the righteous blame in the world at other enablers, turning to the idea that these people are now miraculously free from the cruelty; there’s still this aching feeling somewhere inside all of us that everything that’s happened is all our fault.
god damn.
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