#note: i don't edit my fics either

[apomaro-mellow]

🤩&⌛ please!

🤩 Who is your favorite character to write?

Right now, it's gotta be Steve. He has wormed his way into my brain and become my muse. I can't explain it. I just like writing about him.

⌛ How long does it take you to write a fic, or a chapter?

On average, it takes me about an hour and some change to write a chapter. My chapters aren't that long, usually about 1k. My low efforts ones are even shorter than that so they take even less time

[birdiewritessometimes]

You're too good to me - M. Riddle x Gryffindor! reader

A/N: Hii, this is my first Mattheo fan fic, i hope you enjoy it! I don't own any of the characters. English is not my first language so sorry for any mistakes i might have made. I'm not that happy with the end but oh well!

Pairing: Mattheo Riddle x Gryffindor! reader

Themes/warnings: Fluff, slight angst, Harry and Ron being assholes hihi, slightly suggestive, cursing, one fight with the mention of blood

Word count: 14 000-ish (it's a long one)

Edit: I just edited some mistakes I noticed that i made language wise, oh and i gave it a title hihi <3

Please do not copy or translate my work!

Enjoy!

It was the last lesson before dinner, potions with the Slytherins. It was a gloomy day, the autumn weather making yet an appearance on this Monday afternoon in mid-October. The castle was cold, as it usually was this time of year, making you shiver. It didn’t help that you were in the dungeons, they were usually much colder than the rest of the castle. You pulled your Gryffindor robes tighter around you, as to shield yourself from the cold that was seeping out of the stones. You had taken your usual seat next to one of your friends, Hermione.

“Did you see that Harry and Mattheo Riddle got into a fight again?” She asked in a hushed voice. You shook your head no.

“What, why? Are they hurt?” You whispered back with a worried note in your voice.

“They didn’t fight fight, they argued really bad, just now! Before class.” Hermione explained as you shook your head. Although you’ve never really spoken to Mattheo before you didn’t understand their problem with one another. You couldn’t even remember what started it, but ever since first year they’ve been butting heads, getting into fights, taunting each other. Ron was no better, he would back Harry up whenever he would fight Mattheo, whether it was physical, or verbal didn’t matter. You and Hermione tried to stay out of it, neither of you had any opinion on the boy that was Mattheo Riddle, now Draco was a different story. He would take any opportunity to be mean to either of you, using it to get a rise out of Harry and Ron. Mattheo didn’t do that.

“Really? Do you know about what?” You replied to Hermione, she just had time to shake her head no before Snape walked in, effectively silencing everyone.

“Probably the usual.” Hermione whispered silently before turning to Snape to listen. The usual. The usual consisted of taunts such as ‘you suck Potter’ which was usually answered with ‘tell that to your pathetic family’ or ‘oh look an apprentice death eater’ which was most of the time answered with ‘at least I have a future cupboard boy’ if it wasn’t answered with fists. How Mattheo knew about the cupboard you had no idea.

“Today you will be divided into pairs to work on a particularly complicated potion.” Snapes voice pulled you out of your thoughts. He started to list the pairs in a bored sort of voice. Your attention piqued when you heard him call out your name.

“Miss l/n and Mr Riddle.” You looked around the classroom, trying to find him when you noticed that his eyes already were locked on you, an unreadable expression on his face. He sat in the back of the class, next to a boy you knew as Lorenzo Berkshire, you had worked with him before in arithmancy. You gave Mattheo a small, nervous smile before turning back to listen to Snapes instructions. If you were being honest, you were a bit nervous to work with him considering his dislike for your friends but when Snape finished talking, you walked up to him like he was any other student. You stretched your hand out to him and gave him a smile as you took a seat in the chair Lorenzo previously sat in.

“Hi, I’m y/n, looks like were partners for today.” You said as he shook your hand lazily.

“Yeah, whatever, just try to keep up” he said in a bored tone as he started to prepare the ingredients. You let out a rather, in your opinion, unattractive snort at his comment. He gave you a questioning look which made you realise that he didn’t listen to Snape in the beginning of the lesson.

“You know he paired us up based on how well we’ve been doing in class… so we should be at the same level.” You said with an amused expression on you face as you started to get your book and the rest of the ingredients.

“So, I think I’m going to keep up just fine.” You mocked his voice at ‘keep up’ and you don’t know where the confidence came from to tease him but when he let out a small huff and the smallest smile you’ve ever seen someone make you knew you were getting through his icy exterior.

“You think you’re funny huh?” He said, now adorning a smirk on his handsome face. You gave a small laugh at that.

“Oh, I know I’m funny, yeah, people tell me so all the time. Question is, can you keep up with me?” You joked as you started to stir the cauldron the specific number of stirs as he added ingredients. He let out a low chuckle at that before leaning in into your space. His cologne hit your nose from how close he was. He smelled like sandalwood, nicotine and mint. Why did he have to smell so good?

“We’re just getting started, love, let’s find out, yeah?” Did someone just turn up the heat? The coldness you felt moments ago was gone and replaced with the heat that radiated from his body. You felt a blush form on your cheeks from the pet name and his proximity. His smirk widened when he noticed your pink cheeks.

“Looks like I won’t have a problem keeping up after all, love.” He joked as he turned back to adding ingredients to the potion while you stirred. The lesson went by quicker than you thought, talking and joking with Mattheo. Turns out that he was, dare you say, sweet once he was given a chance, in his own Mattheo-esque way of course. He was also unbelievably flirty, it seemed like it was his personal mission to make you blush as much as he could. If he didn’t grip your hand to make you stir in a specific way, he would call you ‘love’ as much as he could. At the end of the lesson, you helped each other to tidy up your supplies, laughing about how Snape looked exactly like an overgrown bat when he swooped through the halls. You felt weirdly comfortable around him, like you’ve known him for ages and not just for an hour.

“Good job today, Mattheo, I had really fun with you and I’m glad we managed to get the potion right.” You said with a smile as you placed your hand on his arm.

“Thanks love, you did really well today, keeping me on my toes and all.” He said with a smirk at the blush that crept up on your cheeks. You were about to reply when Ron’s shouting interrupted you.

“Y/n, are you coming today or? I’m starving!” Mattheo rolled his eyes at Ron, you gave Mattheo an apologetic smile.

“Yeah, I’m coming! See you, Mattheo.” You said, still with that apologetic smile and then you went to Ron who was waiting by the door with Hermione and Harry, what you didn’t see was the glares the boys sent to each other.

“So, how was it to work with the evil spawn?” Ron asked nonchalantly as you were walking towards the great hall. You frowned at the nick name while Harry let out a laugh.

“I’ll let you know Ron, that Mattheo was really nice to work with.” You said emphasizing ‘Mattheo’. You didn’t like to be dragged into the conflicts Harry and Ron had with people. The only time you did meddle in the drama of this school was in second year when you punched Draco Malfoy on the nose for calling Hermione a mudblood. You didn’t take it well when people were mean for no reason.

“And I don’t like it when you call him that.” You said with a frown as your group rounded a corner, walking up a flight of stairs. Ron and Harry huffed at your defence of the Slytherin boy.

“Oh, you can’t be serious, he’s evil incarnated y/n! He is literally you know whose son, it’s in his blood.” Ron rolled his eyes as Harry nodded in agreement. Hermione huffed in annoyance at the argument that was taking place.

“Just because he is related to you know who doesn’t make him a bad person either! Really Ron, judging people based on blood sounds a tad bit familiar, doesn’t it?” You said, a growing frustration in your voice as you crossed your arms in annoyance at the boy.

“Oh, you’re only saying that because you think he is hot, like all the other girls in this place! You be careful y/n, he will use you if you let him get too close.” Harry added.

“Yeah, he’s only nice to you because he wants to get in your pants!” Ron let out, gesturing wildly with his hands, his own frustrations clearly showing.

“Oh really? Yes, because being partners in potions will definitely lead to sex, as a matter of fact, we’ve already fucked! Ron, did you not see us fucking on the table in potions earlier? I’m sure you saw it Harry, you were right behind us! Oh, wait, that didn’t happen because we were doing the assignment, not each other!” You snapped, letting out your frustrations as the doors to the great hall neared. What you didn’t know was that Mattheo and his friends were walking well within hearing distance from your group, intently listening to the fight you were having with your friends.

“He will weasel his way into your bed, he’s not nice, he is manipulative and you’re falling for it!” Ron accused you as you were now making your way towards Ginny at the Gryffindor table.

“Ron! Insinuating that I will sleep with anyone that is nice to me is really hurtful!” You said, feeling hurt by his words.

“Hey, can we please not fight?” Hermione pleaded as she took a seat next to you and Ginny, who looked confused.

“What are you fighting about?” Ginny asked curiously. Fights amongst your group wasn’t that common, small squabbles, sure, but fights as ugly as this one was becoming had only happened about once or twice in all your years of friendship.

“Ron and Harry being pricks.” You said.

“Evil incarnated” Ron said at the exact same time. Hermione sighed. Ginny let out a chuckle. Harry scoffed.

“What did you do?” She asked, making Ron let out a displeased grunt and Harry an annoyed groan.

“He basically said that the only reason I was defending Mattheo, whom I worked with in potions today, was because I think he is hot” You pointed an accusing finger at Harry.

“And he” You pointed at Ron now “accused me of spreading my legs for anyone that’s nice to me. All because I asked Ronald not to call Mattheo evil spawn, because he was nice to me.” You said, frustration evident in your voice. Ginny gasped.

“It’s true, he’s not a good person y/n! He’s a Riddle!” Ron argued, this time Harry chimed in agreement. You felt tears of frustration pool your eyes.

“I swear if that is your only evidence that he isn’t a good person I’m going hex you. You have no right saying that he isn’t a good person when you don’t know him. What, you base your brilliant deduction from the fact that he fights you, just as you fight him? And you definitely have no right telling me that the only reason I’m defending him is because I find him ‘hot’ and will let him in my bed because he is nice to me, what is wrong with you?!” You burst out. Tears slowly rolling down your cheeks, you hated that you cried when you were angry.

“And you!” You turned to Hermione, hurt that she didn’t at least attempt to back you up.

“Thank you so much for having my back…” You said sarcastically before raising from your seat and storming off. You walked to your dorm, making a beeline for the kitchens to get something to snack on, since you had left dinner before actually eating something. When you got to your dorm you threw your bag on the bed in frustration and changed into some pyjamas. You dried your tears as you put on a long-sleeved shirt and some flannel pyjama pants. Grabbing the snacks you went into the common room again; it was fairly empty since it still was dinnertime. Not feeling like hanging around there you went through the portrait hole and started to make your way towards the astronomy tower. Some air might do you some good. When you finally made it there you sat down and watched the stars as you snacked. You weren’t sure how much time had passed as you sat there thinking about the fight with your friends when you heard voices coming from the entrance of the tower. When you turned around you saw that the voices belonged to the very boy you were fighting about, and his three friends: Theodore Nott, Lorenzo Berkshire and Blaise Zabini. You stared at each other for a moment.

“Princess, what are you doing here?” It was Mattheo who broke the silence.

“Princess?” You, Theodore, Lorenzo and Blaise all questioned at the same time. Mattheo shrugged nonchalantly and sauntered up to where you were sitting on the floor.

“You mind if we join you, darling?” He gestured to the space next to you, you nodded for him to join you, and he sat down next to you, his friends still standing by the entrance in shock of how their friend is behaving.

“You’re trying out different pet names?” you asked with a small smile, he bumped your shoulder with his as he took out a pack of cigarettes, wordlessly offering you one. You declined with a small shake of your head.

“Just trying to figure out which ones makes you get that adorable blush the most.” He said with a cheeky smile as he put the cigarette between his lips.

“Oi, are you dickheads going to stand there all night like fools or are you coming?” He asked over his shoulder to his friends, who all sprang into action. They sat down so that you were sitting in a circle of sorts.

“Princess, dickheads, dickheads, princess.” Mattheo introduced you to his friends, cigarette dangling dangerously from his lips, you let out a snort at that.

“Oh wow, thank you for that extremely informative introduction, Mattheo.” You said sarcastically with an eye roll and then introduced yourself to the two boys you hadn’t met before. He just gave you a cheeky wink and lit his cigarette. The boys started chatting about random stuff as they smoked, you opted to listen rather than speak. You were in a particularly deep thought about the fight with your friends when a hand waved in front of your eyes.

“Huh? Sorry! What did you say?” You asked Theo who had asked you a question.

“I was just asking how it was to work with this idiot in potions today?” He asked again, a small laugh escaped you at his question.

“It was fun, except from that he was so moody in the beginning. ‘Yeah, whatever, just try to keep up’” You mocked him again, making you voice deeper to sound like him, he groaned at your teasing and his friends chuckled.

“Hey, in my defence I thought you were going to be real snarky and mean since you’re friends with Potter and Weasley.” He said with his hands up, half smoked cigarette hanging from his fingers. You frowned at the mention of your friends, the hurt from the fight still raw.

“Yeah, I get that. For the record, I don’t take part in their beefs with people in this school. Well, I did one time, but I don’t like it.” You said shaking your head, Mattheo smiled at you.

“Well, you got me curious now, when did you take part in that sort of drama?” Enzo asked as he looked at you expectantly. You blushed hard at this.

“Oh, I don’t really talk about it.” You mumbled, embarrassed at what you did in second year.

“Oh, please y/n, please tell us.” The boys pleaded with you.

“Okay, fine, ipunchedmalfoyforcallinghermioneabadthing” you said it all in one breath.

“What?”

“Huh?”

“Slower.”

“I punched Malfoy for calling Hermione a bad thing… in second year. I didn’t want to tell you since he’s your friend.” You said, much slower this time. It was quiet for a moment before the guys burst out laughing.

“Omg, that was you?? In second year yeah? Oh my days! He told us it was a guy; you gave him a nosebleed!!” Blaise barked out as he was clutching his stomach.

“Don’t worry darling, we’re not that close with him anyways.” Mattheo assured you between laughter, bumping your shoulder with his again, to which you gave him a grateful smile.

“He said it was a guy who punched him?” You wondered, a small laugh escaping you.

“Yes, he did, he even bragged about him beating the guy up worse.” Enzo added, wheezing as he dried the tears that escaped his eyes.

“What? Nooo he ran away crying.” You said now giggling along with the guys, who got into another laughing fit at that piece of new information.

“Whooo, get yourself a girl who can pack punches,” Theo said, making you blush.

“Well, I defend my friends.” You shrugged, a smile on your lips.

“I’ve been meaning to thank you for that by the way.” Mattheo said after the laughter calmed down, the guys humming in understanding. You, however, were confused.

“What for punching Malfoy?” you asked, eyebrows furrowed. Mattheo let out a chuckle at your confusion.

“No, for defending me when your friends talked shit, after potions.” He said, a small smile on his handsome face. You felt the blush come back.

“You heard that?” You squeaked, hands coming up to cover your cheeks, the group let out a chuckle. Memories about you saying that you fucked on a table flooded your brain as embarrassment hit.

“Yeah, we were, uh, right behind you sweetheart.” Mattheo said with a cheeky grin plastered on his face. You were hiding your face in your hands now, only peeking through your fingers.

“Omg, kill me now!” You muttered, feeling completely mortified.

“I must say, my favourite part was definitely the ‘fucking on the table’ part, it really got your point across.” He said and the group laughed at that.

“We were doing the assignment, not each other.” He mocked you, adding to your embarrassment. The rest of the boys laughed at this too.

“Oh shut up!” You squeaked again, still feeling very embarrassed by your choice of words.

“No, but seriously, thank you for defending me, I hope you didn’t fight too bad with your friends.” He said, scratching the back of his neck. His friends, who had calmed down form their laughing fit, were watching your interaction with curiosity.

“Yeah, of course. Please don’t worry about my idiot friends.” You said, glancing down at your slipper clad feet as you rubbed your arms, feeling the cool night air seep through your shirt.

“I can’t help but feel a little responsible…” Mattheo trailed of as he took his hoodie of and draped it around your shoulders, you gave him a small smile as a thanks. His friends looked at each other with surprise at Mattheos behaviour. He was known to be quite the flirt, using girls and then going to the next one. Never had they seen him give his sweaters to any girl, or come to second thought, interact with a girl like he was with you.

“You did nothing wrong Mattheo, Ron was out of line, he said some nasty things, Harry too and Hermione didn’t do anything so…” You said as you shrugged on his hoodie properly, the garment wrapping you in a blanket of warmth and his scent.

“What did he say, if you don’t mind me asking? I skipped potions today” Theo asked cautiously, you gave him a sad smile. Secretly grateful for the fact that his friends didn’t gossip about what had happened.

“So, Ron called Mattheo a bad name, I asked him not to call him that, then Harry basically said that the only reason I was defending him was because I thought that he was hot, and Ron insinuated that I would sleep with anyone that was nice to me. That really hurt my feelings and the fact that they doubled down on that when Ginny asked what was going on hurt even more.” It was quiet when you finished, Theo looked shocked to say the least, the rest of the boys looked angry, having heard the argument in real life.

“Potter and Weasley really said that? To their friend?” Theo then asked in disbelief as you nodded in confirmation.

“Well, they’re prats, but we already knew that.” He then said, making you laugh at how bizarre the whole situation is. Here you were hanging out with the group how almost caused as much trouble as the twins, you were hanging out with the very boy you had defended hours before. It’s funny, because you weren’t known to be a troublemaker, you opted to put your energy into studying, achieving great grades instead. You couldn’t be more opposite these boys, yet here you were, enjoying the time you’re spending with them.

“They’re not even prats, they’re like proper twats.” You laughed, making the others laugh with you this time.

“You know y/n, you’re pretty cool, for being a Gryffindor and all.” Blaise said with a teasing smile.

“Oh, thank you, you guys are really sweet, for being Slytherins that is.” You teased right back.

“Sweet? Sweet?? What are we? Six years old?” Mattheo said, incredulously, the others nodded along with his teasing.

“Yes, you guys are the sweetest bad boys I’ve ever met.” You said, pinching his cheek in a teasing manner. They all jokingly groaned at that. Then you fell into an easy conversation with the group, the boys successfully cheered you up by taking your mind of the fight. They made you feel welcome in their little group, despise you being in a different house than them, you understood that even if you didn’t care about houses others did. You were well aware of their reputation in the school. They were troublemakers, didn’t follow rules, fought whoever ticked them off. People were wary of them, not wanting to get on their bad side and the people who weren’t wary of them disliked them. Your friends were a part of that second group of people. The group of Slytherin boys were also knows to be quite the flirts, being successful with a majority of the girls in school. Your train of thought were cut short when you realised the time.

“Oh, guys we need to get to bed, we have classes in the morning!” You exclaimed, rising to your feet in a hurry. The rest of the group rose lazily, some putting out their cigarettes before casually strolling down the stairs. You were however feeling a bit stressed due to the time and the fact that you were out of bed after curfew, but the boys were as cool as ever. When it came to where you were supposed to part ways to get to your respective common rooms you all hesitated for a moment. Just as you were about to say something Mattheo spoke.

“I’ll walk you to your common room, love.” He said in a low voice, making your eyes widen, so did the rest of the groups. Before you could reply, or even say goodnight to the rest Mattheo put his hand on the small of your back and started to guide you towards the portrait hole. His hand was warm and heavy against the small of your back, only the thick fabric of your his sweater acting as a barrier between the two of you. His hand hung low on your back, it was borderline inappropriate, and you felt your cheeks heat up because of it. You were almost disappointed when the fat lady came into view, shaking the feeling away you turned to him when you reached the top of the stairs.

“Thank you for cheering me up tonight, Mattheo.” You murmured and gave him a small smile; he smiled right back at you. You began to take his hoodie off, to give it back to him when he stopped you by grabbing your wrists. His large hands engulfing your smaller ones.

“Keep it princess.” He murmured and you felt your cheeks warm for what must be the 458th time this evening. You don’t know what came over you, was it his warm hands holding yours? Or was it the low, intimate lighting and the fact that it was in the middle of the night? You don’t know. What you did know was that fact that you rose to the very tips of your toes, your cheeks flushing even harder from what you were about to do and placed a soft kiss on his cheek. His hands were still holding yours as you felt them tense a little. You muttered a soft ‘good night’ into his ear before slipping out of his grip and going through the portrait hole. The small butterflies that resided in your stomach erupted into a storm when the portrait swung closed. You made your way towards your dorm, the common room was completely empty, not unusual considering the time. You snuck into your bed, still feeling giddy, and laid there as you thought about the boy who was Mattheo Riddle. What you didn’t know was that he was thinking about you as he walked back to his common room in the middle of the night.

The next morning you awoke to an empty dorm, you assumed Hermione had left for breakfast with Harry and Ron. You got dressed and headed down towards the great hall for breakfast. When you entered you saw the trio already sitting there eating their breakfast, your usual seat beside Harry was empty. You opted to sit with Ginny and the twins, not feeling like talking to your friends. When you sat down you made eye contact with Theo from across the hall. You gave him a smile and a small wave to which he nodded back at you, with a small smile on his face. He was sitting with his friends; Mattheo was missing from the group however. Before you could even begin to wonder where he was Ginny interrupted you.

“Since when do you know Theodore Nott?” She leaned over with a glint in her eye, having noticed the interaction. You gave her a startled laugh.

“Well, I sort of ran into him his friends yesterday after dinner.” You said with a small smile on your lips. Your cheeks turned the slightest pink as thoughts of Mattheo entered your head.

“So that’s what you were doing?” Fred asked, amusement clear in his voice.

“We missed you in the common room last night.” George mused.

“Oh please, you guys just wanted a new test subject for your new products.” You said with an eyeroll before taking a bite out of your toast.

“Of course not y/n! We wanted to hang out with our favourite goody two shoes.” Fred said, throwing his arm around your shoulders with a smirk on his face. You let out a snort at that.

“But seriously, we want to know everything.” George said, curiosity getting the better of him.

“When you met.” Fred continued.

“How you met.” George said.

“What you did.” Ginny added at the end.

“You guys are the biggest gossips I know.” You said in feigned annoyance with a smile before telling them about how you went to the astronomy tower to think. How they showed up to what was apparently their usual spot for smoking. How you had met Mattheo just hours before in potions. You told them how they cheered you up from the fight with your friends who sat just a couple of seats away. The twins had heard about the fight from Ginny and when you gave them a small recap, they assured you that they gave Ron a piece of their mind. They even said that Ron was blacklisted from Weasley’s Wizards Wheezes, making you smile at the fact that they had your back. You told them that you were up until late after curfew due to how much fun you were having. You didn’t however tell them about how Mattheo gave you butterflies or how you kissed his cheek when he had walked you to the common room.

“What?” George said in disbelief.

“You’re telling me that they got you to stay out until after curfew? You? Little goody two shoes y/n? Never broken a school rule before. This is something else! I recon we should thank these guys, George!” Fred said, not believing his ears. You let out a laugh at this.

“You guys act like I’m some nun! Anyways, I got to get to class.” You said as you got your things and rose to your feet. Fred and George let out comically large sighs at this, making Ginny giggle.

“Doesn’t seem like they made her relaxed enough to not be five minutes early to every class.” Fred groaned.

“You can’t win them all.” George added dramatically. You rolled your eyes with a smile and then with a wave goodbye started to make your way towards your first class of the day. You were glad that the twins and Ginny at least didn’t seem to have a problem with your new friends. The classes dragged on and on until lunch, you were too preoccupied with thinking about your new friends, how nice they were to you. When finally, your last lesson before lunch ended, you quickly packed up your things and made your way out of the classroom. When you exited the classroom, you bumped into Enzo who was exiting the classroom right besides yours.

“Oh, hi y/n, heading to the great hall?” He asked with a smile, silently gesturing for you to join him.

“Hi Enzo, yeah just finished ancient runes, what about you?” You asked, falling into step with him.

“Yeah, I just had history of magic.” He answered. The two of you fell into an easy conversation about school and the classes you were talking as you made your way towards the great hall. As you walked and talked with Enzo you noticed that people were looking warily at you, well more at the boy you were walking with. You noticed some glares and some apprehensive looks. Enzo seemed unbothered by the looks, completely consumed by his rant about how divination is a load of crap.

“Hey, Enzo, can I ask you a question?” You had interrupted him before you could stop yourself. He nodded, looking curious to your shift in demeanour.

“How come you guys are so nice to me?” You voiced a thought that had drifted in your head during the morning.

“What do you mean?” He asked, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“I mean, considering who my friends are, it would be easy to not like me either.” You said, a small frown making its way to your lips. Enzo gave a small smile at that.

“Yeah, but you have always been nice, well of course except to Malfoy but who cares, don’t you remember when we worked together in arithmancy in third year and instead of laughing at me for not understanding, like some would’ve done, you helped me instead?” Enzo explained as you rounded a corner.

“It was the same with Matt, you were kind to him despite his reputation and his family, you even stood up for him when you barley knew him. That is why I, at least, like you.” He said with a smile on his lips. You looked at him shocked, you did remember when you had worked with Enzo, he had a problem with understanding certain things, but that’s not something to laugh about is it? Just as you were about to open your mouth Mattheo and Theo joined you.

“Hey, what are you guys talking about?” Theo asked casually throwing an arm over your shoulders, his other over Enzos. Mattheo walked on the other side of you. You snapped out of your trance at this and directed a chuckle at the boys antics.

“Nothing really, I just met y/n after history of magic.” Enzo shrugged as he gave you a small smile that told you that your conversation would stay with him, you gave him a smile back.

“Oh, so you weren’t talking about how someone couldn’t keep their hands to themselves yesterday then?” Mattheo said in a sing song voice, obviously his question hinted at the kiss you had given him outside of your common room. You gripped his arm and gave him a warning squeeze to not say anything, but he just gave you a teasing smirk.

“Why would we talk about you obviously not keeping your hands to yourself?” Enzo deadpanned; Theo let out a laugh at that.

“Princess, you don’t have to leave.”

“Here darling, take my hoodie.”

“You’re so pretty under the stars, love.” The boys mocked their friend who let out a dramatic gasp. You laughed as you felt your blush rise on your face.

“I did not say that!” Mattheo let out in disbelief.

“You so did!” Enzo countered.

“No, I was obviously talking about y/n not being able to keep her hands of me, she even kissed me!” Mattheo let out in light frustration, waving his arms around. The boys paused right in front of the doors to the great hall. It was quiet for a moment before they let out a laugh so loud it drew the attention of all the people in the great hall as they entered.

“Yeah, right!” Theo said.

“Like that happened.” Enzo continued and Mattheo sputtered in shock that his friends didn’t believe him, when he looked at you, he saw that you giggled at this.

“Oh, you think this is funny? Now be a good girl and tell them the truth.” Mattheo said with a smirk as he grabbed your face to make you look him directly in the eyes, your blush making yet an appearance. Theos arm fell of your shoulders as you stared into Mattheos deep brown eyes. His presence invaded your senses, his smell, his warmth. His eyes were soft, but his smirk was prominent on his face. Your expression spoke for itself, and the boys let out sounds of disbelief when they realised that you did actually kiss him.

“What?”

“No way?”

“With his fugly mug?” You let out a laugh at Theos comment before you broke the eye contact with Mattheo and effectively breaking the trance he had put you in.

“On the cheek, I kissed him goodnight on the cheek, gosh you guys are so dramatic!” You corrected with a smile was on your lips. They spluttered as they tried to disagree with your statement. You laughed as you turned to walk towards the Gryffindor table, not before you gave the boys a cheesy smile and a wave goodbye. When you sat down beside Ginny and opposite the twins the group was awfully quiet. When you looked up from your plate you saw that the three of them looked at you with knowing smirks plastered on their faces.

“What?” you asked, your voice squeaking from the attention.

“Don’t you ‘what’ us! What was that all about?” George asked curiously. You gave a small laugh to try to cover up your embarrassment.

“I was just walking to lunch, with Mattheo, Enzo and Theo.” You said with a shrug as you took a bite of your lunch, feigning innocence.

“Not that! The whole almost kissing Riddle thing!” Fred said teasingly. You hadn’t realised that the whole school had seen when Mattheo had grabbed your face, and you certainly hadn’t realised that it looked like he was about to kiss you.

“We were not about to kiss!” You said incredulously. The three of them exchanged knowing glances before continuing to tease you about Mattheo.

It had been three days since that one incident in the great hall, it was now Friday and you were doing some studying in the library, or well, trying to since you ran into Mattheo on the way there. He insisted on joining your study session, what you didn’t know at the time was that it was to bother you while you studied.

“What about this one?” He asked as he held up a tube of lip gloss from your makeup bag. You had opened it to get some lip balm, and it had piqued the Slytherins interest, make up was probably more interesting than the essay he had to write for defence against the dark arts.

“That is lip gloss Mattheo, it makes your lips shine.” You said as you tried to concentrate on the book of ancient runes in front of you. You heard that he put the product back in your little bag and then you felt his presence closer to you. You turned to him to find him staring right back at you. Those butterflies erupted in your stomach again as they did so often when you were with Mattheo. He was staring at you intently, his soft brown eyes traced the outline of your face, your eyes, your nose, your lips, back to your eyes.

“You know you’re beautiful without it right?” He muttered as his eyes continued to trace your face. You didn’t register what he was saying as you were watching him too, your eyes mapping his face, where his scar crossed his eyebrow. The tiny scar on the bridge of his nose, before you knew it you had reached out, your fingers softly tracing the scar across his eye. Mattheo was still staring at you with those Bambi-eyes of his.

“Where did you get this?” You whispered, your fingers still tracing the scar on his face. His eyes never left yours as his hand moved up to his face to cover yours, giving it a soft squeeze. Your palm was flat against his cheek now, feeling his warm skin, while his large hand was covering yours.

“It’s nothing.” He murmured, closing his eyes. The intimate moment made you feel like you were going to explode. He was so close, so intoxicating, his warmth was like an embrace, his scent of mint, nicotine and sandalwood had become familiar, but no less addicting. When he opened his eyes he looked right at you, his gaze soft and gentle. The moment between you were interrupted by footsteps that was coming your way. He let go of your hand which you let fall to your lap. You both then turned back to your respective work, Mattheo actually doing the work this time. It was Hermione who rounded the corner to your table.

“Do you mind if I sit?” She asked carefully, you gave a wary smile and gestured for her to sit. You cast a sideways glance at Mattheo and saw that he wore a stoic look on his face, his eyes trained on Hermione.

“I’m really sorry that I didn’t defend you y/n, I really am!” Hermione let out when she had sat down, and you felt like some of the weight that had been on your shoulders lifted. You gave a smile before reaching over the table to give your friend a hug.

“Thank you, you have no idea how much that means to me!” You said as you sat back down in your chair.

“Besides, I’ve really missed you.” You said as you smiled at each other.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Hermione meet Mattheo, Mattheo, Hermione.” You introduced them and they nodded at each other, a bit awkwardly. Mattheos face did soften a bit at Hermione’s apology. After dinner you and Hermione hung out in your shared dorm, Ginny had joined you after a while. The hot topic that was being discussed was your newfound friendship with the Slytherin boys. Ginny was happily filling Hermione in on the details about a certain boy that you conveniently left out.

“They did sit rather close to each other in the library earlier…” Hermione thought out loud, Ginny let out a squeal at this piece of new information.

“Oh! Hermione I didn’t tell you about how he was about to kiss her in the great hall!” Ginny said excitedly. You spluttered at that.

“He did not try to kiss me, Ginny! You can’t just say that!” You said your voice high pitched with embarrassment.

“What did he do then y/n?” Hermione asked an amused smirk playing on her lips, Ginny was practically bouncing on your bed with excitement as she explained the moment between the two of you.

“It was nothing!” You said shyly.

“It was totally something!!” Ginny exclaimed excitedly.

“It did sound like something y/n! Come on you can at least admit that you think he’s cute.” Hermione said teasingly, you kept quiet for a moment, deliberating whether you should answer or not. You did think that Mattheo was cute, of course you did. He is stunning, curly hair, dark brown eyes, charming smile, those butterflies erupted in your stomach again.

“Okay, fine, yes he is cute.” You let out in defeat and the girls let out squeals of excitement.

“I knew it!” Ginny let out in triumph as you and Hermione laughed at her but before either of you could reply a knock could be heard at the door. Still chuckling from the previous conversation, you hopped of your bed and went to open the door. Outside of your dorm was a shy first year. Taken aback by the little boy you stuck your head out of your door to look around.

“Can I, uh help you?” You asked curiously while looking at the boy who was too shy to meet your eyes. He quickly thrusted a note in your hands before taking of, running away. You held on to the note, utterly confused as you closed your door and turned back to your friends.

“What is it?” Hermione asked.

“I don’t know, a note.” You replied as you showed them the note.

“Well, what are you waiting for? Read it!” Ginny urged. You unfolded the note and sat down on your bed again, Ginny and Hermione coming closer to read it over your shoulder.

“Evening darling,

I was hoping you would get your little butt out of your dorm and join us for a smoke in the astronomy tower (I know you don’t smoke but I would love some company since I can feel myself loosing IQ-points from hanging out with the guys for too long). I’m waiting for you outside of the portrait.

- M.R.

P.S. get a sweater, it’s cold out”

Ginny and Hermione squealed in excitement as they shook your shoulders.

“Oh, you have to go y/n!!!” Ginny said excitedly.

“Yes, have fun on your dateeee!” Hermione said in a sing song voice as she threw Mattheos sweater in your face.

“It’s not a date, the others will probably be there too.” You defended as you subconsciously slipped on his sweater and put on your slippers. The girls practically pushed you out of your dorm, giggling like mad men as they closed the door behind you. With a smile and shake of your head you started to head towards the exit of the common room. When you exited the portrait, you paused at the scene in front of you. Harry and Ron had Mattheo cornered, the latter looking more agitated by the second.

“I don’t care, Riddle” Harry spat his name “you’re outside my common room, so I believe it is my business.”

“And I don’t care that it’s your common room, it’s none of your business, Potter” Mattheo spat back. He was a good deal taller than Harry, just a couple of centimetres above Ron. He was staring down on them, with a glare so intense it sent shivers down your spine. This was the Mattheo the rest of the school saw, cold, irritated, bad-tempered Mattheo, not the nice, caring boy you saw.

“If you think you’re here to see y/n you have another thing coming.” Ron gritted out through clenched teeth. Harry nodded in agreement and Mattheo clenched his jaw in annoyance. You noticed the shift in the air as Ron said this. Mattheo looked almost angry now, not wanting the situation to escalate you let your presence be known.

“I don’t see how that’s any of your business.” You spoke as you walked around them and placed yourself in front of Mattheo, reaching your hand back to grab his, in what you thought would be a comforting manner. Harry and Ron looked shocked at what you said.

“Wait, y/n you’re taking his side again?” Harry said with a scoff.

“Well, was he doing anything wrong when you got here?” You asked annoyed with their behaviour, it was Ron who scoffed this time. Remembering his thoughts as to why you defended Mattheo the last time you spoke you whirled on him.

“You got something to say, Ron?” You asked, your own irritation bubbling up to the surface. You could feel a grounding squeeze on your hand by Mattheo. You gave him a thankful look.

“Yeah, as a matter of fact I do! It’s clear why you’re defending him, he has clearly gotten in your pants! He’s playing with you, he is using you y/n, how can you be so stupid not to see that?” Ron let out his frustration. It felt like time stopped. It felt like your heart shattered when you heard Ron, your friend since first year, utter those words. You felt tears well up in your eyes.

“Ron, you’re so out of line.” You said through your tears, and you felt Mattheo move to stand beside you, his hand moving from yours to your back, rubbing comforting circles there to soothe you. He was giving Ron an icy glare as he comforted you as your tears now flowed freely.

“You better watch your mouth, Weasley.” He said, his tone cold.

“Hey, don’t threaten him!” Harry said, taking his friends side, Mattheo let out a cold, slow laugh at Harrys reaction.

“Oh, that’s really something, Potter. I knew you were a git, but I thought that you treated your friends better than this. You should be glad that y/n is here, otherwise I would beat the shit out of you two for saying shit like this.” Mattheo said angrily before taking you had in his and leading you away from them. Tears were streaming down your face at your friends words, you could hear that Harry and Ron were saying something behind you, but you couldn’t hear what, your ears were ringing. When you rounded a corner Mattheo stopped you. He pulled you into an embrace and ran his hand up and down you back in a comforting manner as you cried into his chest. Slowly the tears came to a stop and you peaked up at him, he gave you a worried look.

“I’m sorry” You mumbled, feeling embarrassed for crying on him, he gave you a small smile

“You, my love, have nothing to be sorry for. Now for Weasley and Potter it’s a different story.” You could see how his face went cold when he talked about them and you could feel how his grip on your waist tightened. He then did something that shocked you, he placed a kiss on your forehead. For him it seemed like it was the most natural thing in the world as he pulled you into his arms again, but it made your brain short-circuit. You could feel how he rested his head atop of yours as he held you. You let yourself relax in his arms for a moment before slightly pulling away again and looking up at him.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, his eyes soft again, as he brought his hand up to your face to wipe away the last remaining tears there.

“I’ve been better?” It came out more as a question as you were more focused on his large, warm palm on your face. He gave you a small smile and a chuckle slipped out from his lips.

“We don’t have to hang out with the others if you don’t want to…” He said tenderly as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. You shook your head, giving the boy a small smile.

“No, I think some cheering up could do me good.” You said. You were still heartbroken from Rons words. That’s the thing with Ron, he will find the most hurtful things to say when he is mad at someone.

“Alright then, but if you want to go you let me know, okay?” He said, grabbing your face with both of his hands searching your face for any uncertainty. You gave a small smile and nodded. With a short nod himself he grabbed your hand as you started walking towards the astronomy tower. His hand in yours was grounding and comforting as he intertwined your fingers, his thumb stroking your knuckles. The walk was silent, you could see how Mattheos jaw clenched and unclenched as you walked, presumably thinking about what had just happened. You had never seen him angry up close before but when he was staring Harry and Ron down you had to admit that he looked scary. He had the same look now as you walked together and while you weren’t scared of him you could see why people where. You would probably fear him too if it weren’t for the way he was holding your hand. When you reached the top of the stairs in the astronomy he didn’t let go, the group of boys quieted down when they heard your footsteps.

“Look who finally stopped making out in a broom closet and decided to joi-” It was Theo who spoke first but stopped himself when he saw your faces, yours with streaks of tears and Mattheos looking like he could kill someone. “What happened?” He then asked seriously, and Mattheo moved to sit down, brining you with him, making you sit down so close to him that your legs touched. He didn’t once make a move to let go of your hand, the feeling was probably as grounding for him as it was to you. He had it in his lap now, playing with the rings on your fingers as he frowned at Theos question. Balise and Enzo both looked at you worriedly and you decided to speak.

“We ran into Harry and Ron.” You said your voice hoarse from the crying. You felt his grip on your hand tighten before he looked up.

“I was waiting for her outside the common room. Those two twats decided to corner me and then y/n came and Weasley” He spat out the name “said some really foul things to her.” His grip was firm now and you gave him a reassuring squeeze that made him look at you and his face softened as his eyes met yours.

“They’re dead.” Blaise said coldly, Enzo and Theo nodded slowly in agreement. You felt the cold queasy feeling of anxiety creep up from the pit of your stomach.

“Guys, please don’t fight them because of me, please.” You said, panic evident in your voice, the thought making you sick. You didn’t want any of your friends to be hurt, neither your new ones or your old ones. Because despite that you’re fighting you still consider Harry and Ron your friends, maybe not as close as before, but still friends. You felt Mattheo pull you to him so that you were sitting in between his legs, his arms wrapping protectively around you as he soothed you. His scent of nicotine, mint and sandalwood enveloped you like a hug.

“Don’t worry love, we won’t fight anyone if that’s what you want.” He mumbled into your hair before kissing your head. You felt your panic settle slowly and as you looked at the others you saw for the first time that they weren’t giving Mattheo cheesy looks like they usually did when he showed you affection or flirted with you. They looked angry, like they didn’t even notice the way Mattheo was holding you.

“But they can’t just treat our friend like that!” Enzo said, anger in his voice. What you noticed was the use of the word friend. They saw you as their friend. You don’t know why it hit you like this, you considered the boys your friends after the first time you met them in the astronomy tower, but the fact that they considered you their friend as well made you feel warm.

“Listen darling, I can promise that we won’t initiate any fights with them” Mattheo looked pointedly at Enzo as he said this. “But if they start one��” You slowly nodded; it seemed like a fair compromise even if you didn’t like it. The others nodded too.

“We can always beat them of their brooms in our next quidditch match.” Blaise let out, you let out a chuckle when you saw the small teasing smile on his face. The thing was that you wouldn’t be surprised if the Slytherin beaters accidentally did club Harry of his broom in the next match. Slowly the tense conversation eased into lighter topics, you could still see that the boys were angry from what happened earlier but you were glad that they slowly found their way back to their normal selves. You were still sitting between Mattheos legs, his arm around your back and his other hand in your lap. You were now playing with his rings as your head rested against his chest. You were feeling drained from all that happened and the vibrations in Mattheos chest from when he was talking was soothing you, making you sleepier by the moment. You heard that the boys went from talking loudly to low murmurs as you slipped in and out of sleep. The warmth of Mattheos large hand on your back under your shirt was the last thing you felt before dosed off, head nestled on his chest as he smoked his cigarette, comfortably rubbing the bare skin of your back.

You awoke some time later. The guys were still murmuring to each other lowly. You could feel Mattheos warm body against yours just like how you fell asleep, your fingers still clutching his. You could feel his other hand against the bare skin of your back.

“Good morning sleeping beauty.” Theo said teasingly when he saw that you were awake. You let out a yawn and you felt Mattheo chuckle.

“You comfortable there?” Blaise said joining in on the teasing, making you blush.

“Yeah, actually, Matty here is very comfy.” You said cheekily while cuddling closer to the boy. He chuckled and his hand found your waist under your shirt and gave it a squeeze.

“You sure you and Matty weren’t actually making out in the broom closet before you came here?” Enzo said with a smirk on his face and the others started cackling.

“Oh, shut up Enzo!” Mattheo let out with a chuckle and you were blushing hard at the insinuation. You get as to why they are teasing you though. You were sitting on the floor with Mattheo, you between his legs as your side are pressed to his chest and your legs were draped over one of his. His arm around your back and his other hand in your lap. You really did understand why they were teasing you, but it didn’t stop you from feeling embarrassed by their teasing. Enzo stuck his tongue out at you two which made you laugh.

“But seriously, how long was I asleep?” You asked and they chuckled at you.

“About 30 minutes.” Theo said and you sat up straighter.

“I’m sorry I fell asleep when we were supposed to hang out.” You apologised with a small frown.

“Hey, don’t worry about it, princess, you just needed some sleep. We don’t blame you.” Mattheo said softly, engulfing your hand in his. You could hear the other snigger at you two but you couldn’t bring yourself to care. Not when you could feel yourself getting lost in his chocolate brown eyes. Those eyes who were looking at you intently, with a softness not many had ever seen.

“Don’t worry about it princess.” Blaise said in a voice mocking Mattheos.

“Oh, Matty, you’re so nice and handsome.” Theo said in a high-pitched voice that you assumed was supposed to be you.

“I’m so dark and twisted but for you I’m nice and sweet, look I even cuddle.” Enzo joined in with a dark voice that was supposed to sound like Mattheo. This made you burst out laughing. Mattheo rolled his eyes but couldn’t supress his amused smile.

“You guys are the worst!” You said as you laughed at them, the three boys were sitting there with cheeky grins on their faces.

“No, you guys are the worst, sitting like that making us feel like third, fourth and fifth wheels.” Blaise said with a teasing eyeroll. You chuckled at that.

“Aww, Blaisie you could always cuddle each other.” You said in a mockingly sweet voice making Mattheo chuckle. Blaise made a face at the thought of cuddling Enzo and Theo.

“Oh, come on Blaise, it wouldn’t be that bad.” Mattheo said, enjoying that you were finally the ones doing the teasing. Sensing an opening you turned to the boy whose lap you were practically sitting in.

“How would you know, Matty? Is cuddling a common practice in the Slytherin dorms?” You asked looking up at the boy with a smirk on your face. He was smirking right back at you.

“You have no idea.” Mattheo said jokingly making you laugh. The banter continued between your group long into the night, successfully cheering you up yet again. This night ended in the same way, Mattheo was walking you to your common room, with a hand on the low of your back. When you reached the portrait hole you turned to him and quietly thanked him for tonight. When you were about to turn around to go into your common room he grabbed your wrist.

“Hey, where is my goodnight kiss?” He said, a small pout on his lips. His question made your blush make yet another appearance on your cheeks. You smiled at the boy who was looking at you expectantly. You put your hands on his shoulders, his found your waist, rose to the very tips of your toes and you placed a kiss on his cheek, just like the first time he walked you back. With a shy smile you let go of him, murmured a soft goodnight and then went in through the portrait hole. You didn’t miss the broad smile on his face as he turned around to get back to his own common room.

The next morning you awoke with a smile on your face as memories from the night before flooded to your brain. It was around 9 when you woke up and you saw that Hermione was awake and reading a book in her bed. When she saw that you were awake, she put down her book and came to your bed, begging for details about your night. You told her about everything. Needing someone to vent to you told her about what Harry and Ron did, all the physical affection between you and Mattheo, the teasing from the boys, all of it. Hermione was giving you her thoughts about the situation as you got ready for the day. It was a Hogsmeade weekend, for which you both were excited. You needed to refill your snack drawer. As you exited your dorm you ran into Ginny and the three of you started to walk through the common room together on your way to breakfast. You joined the twins at the Gryffindor table, Harry and Ron were sitting a few places away from you, Ron sent you a nasty look which Hermione sent a glare back. She was very upset with them for what they did yesterday, Ginny and the twins too as soon as they were filled in on what happened.

The conversation switched to lighter topic as your group made their way to Hogsmeade. When you reached the village the twins left you for Zonko’s. You, Ginny and Hermione walked around in different shops but ultimately found your way to Honeydukes to fill up on snacks. You hadn’t seen any of the Slytherin boys all day and you were wondering if they even went to Hogsmeade today. While you were in Honeydukes you picked out different types of sweets to give to them, in case they didn’t get to go. After Honeydukes you all carries heavy bags of sweets. You stopped by The Three Broomsticks for some butterbeers before heading back to the castle. When you finally got back you dumped your sweets in their designated drawer before grabbing the bag you bought for the boys.

“Hey, Hermione, I’m just going to give this to the guys okay? See you in a bit.” You said as you leaved your dorm. When you exited the common room it struck you that you had no idea where they were. Deciding to check the astronomy tower first you started to make your way there. However, when you arrived it was empty. You checked the library after that, also empty. The great hall, empty. It left you no choice, you went down into the dungeons, on your way you met a Slytherin girl in your year that you were friendly with, Daphne Greengrass. You made small talk as you walked together towards the Slytherin common room. She was kind enough to tell you the password after letting you in. The Slytherin common room was quite different from Gryffindors. It had large windows that showed you the bottom of the black lake, large black couches and some fireplaces with warming fires going. Despite what you heard about it, their common room was cozy. You looked out the windows into the black lake and saw all sorts of fish and other creatures. The guys weren’t here either though.

“Excuse me, do you where Mattheos dorm is?” You asked a 7th year who lazily pointed you in the direction of his dorm. You walked up the stairs and made your way to where the 7th year showed you. You noticed that no one batted an eye at your presence in their common room, nor when you asked for the boys dormitories. Funny how different it would’ve been if the roles were reversed, and the boys were wandering around the Gryffindor common room. Stopping in front of the door you assumed was Mattheos and the rests dorm you took a deep breath before knocking. You waited, no answer. You listened intently and you heard their voices, they must’ve not heard you. You knocked again, harder this time and you heard footsteps nearing the door. It opened and before you were Enzo.

“Oh y/n! Come in. What are you doing here?” He asked curiously as he stepped aside for you to enter. You noticed that you walked into not a dorm but a hall full of doors.

“You guys have your own private dorms?” You asked in disbelief to which he chuckled and gave you a ‘yeah’ as he led you to one of the doors where you could hear shouts and someone groaning. You gave him an uncertain glance which he replied with a small smile before opening the door. Before you were a sight to behold. Mattheo was sitting on the bed, shirtless and bloody. He had dried blood coming from his nose, down his chin and chest, and a cut on his eyebrow. He held a bloody rag to his nose as he listened to Theo and Blaise cuss him out. You dropped the bag of sweets in shock of the scene making the boys freeze and look at you, like deer caught in headlights.

“You’re hurt.” You said with a frown as you stood in the doorway. Mattheo let out a breath.

“It’s nothing love, what are you doing here?” He asked, trying to change the subject.

“What happened?” You asked, crossing your arms over your chest. Blaise chuckled at how you didn’t let up.

“Nothing darling, don’t worry.” He said, winching as he tried to smile, you now noticed a cut in his lip too.

“I’m not stupid Mattheo.” The guys chuckled at how you pursed your lips at him “If I heal you, will you talk?” You asked giving him a pointed look to which he nodded defeated. You bent down, grabbed the bag of sweets and placed it at the desk before moving to stand in front of him, your wand ready.

“Talk first.” You demanded, making the others cackle.

“She drives a hard bargain.” Theo said, amused as he watched the scene unfold. Mattheo mumbled something under his breath that you didn’t catch, the others cackled louder at this. You whirled around and glared at them.

“Shut up” You hissed at them before turning to the boy you were harbouring a crush on.

“What? Use your big boy words.” You said, annoyance in your voice, you could hear the others snigger quietly, making you send glares at them.

“I might have heard McLaggen talk about, uh, someone and I sort of beat him up.” He said sheepishly. You rose an eyebrow at the boy.

“You beat up McLaggen for talking about someone, about who?” You pressed to which he shrugged. You narrowed your eyes at him and then the others who all held up their hands in surrender.

“Why would you do that?” You asked, he shrugged again with a sigh of annoyance you quickly healed him to which he was grateful.

“You’re so annoying.” You mumbled under your breath to which he beamed.

“Yes, but you still love me.” He said in a sing song voice to which you rolled your eyes, but a small smile crept up on your lips.

“Anyways, the reason I decided to bless you with my presence was to give you guys this. I didn’t see you in Hogsmeade today, but since you were busy beating people up for talking about others, I now know why.” You said pointedly as you gave them the bag of sweets, still feeling quite annoyed.

“Oh, y/n this is really nice of you.” Blaise said taken aback.

“You really didn’t have to…” Theo muttered as Enzo and Mattheo murmured in agreement. This made you soften, your annoyance with the boys slowly fading away. You busied yourself with wetting a cloth with some water before slowly walking over to the bed where Mattheo was sitting stunned. You handed him the wet cloth, he accepted it with a small smile, blood still on his face.

“Haven’t anyone brought you a gift before?” You asked softly as the boys stared at the candy, Mattheo cleaning of the dried blood of his face and chest. They shook their heads no at your question.

“We aren’t the most liked people in school, as you know.” Enzo muttered fiddling with the packaging of a chocolate frog. This broke your heart.

“Well, I like you and I will always bring you something from Hogsmeade if you can’t make it.” You said determination in your voice making the boys look at you with wide eyes.

“Like you said, we’re friends, and I like to bring gifts to my friends.” You said with a smile, the boys slowly smiled too. You saw appreciative looks on their faces when you looked around the room, when your eyes landed on Mattheo next to you, you noticed that he had missed some blood.

“Here, let me.” You said softly and you reached to grab the cloth before wiping away some blood on his eyebrow. The look he was giving you now was the same one he gave you in the library. It made your breath catch in your throat, your movements coming to a halt as your eyes caught his. He was looking at you with those Bambi-eyes, butterflies erupted in your stomach, just like they usually did with him. His hand gripped your thigh, not in a sexual way, it was more like he was assuring himself that you really were there.

“You’re too good to us.” He murmured as he held your gaze, you cleared your throat, continuing to wipe away blood, from his chest now.

“I’m not, I just appreciate you guys, you’ve been really nice to me.” You said, a small smile on your lip as you threw the cloth in the trash.

“Well, that settles it, you can never leave us, I’m too attached now.” Blaise said with a cheesy smile on his face as he made his way to you and before you knew it, he pulled you into a bone crushing hug, lifting you up in the air. You squealed and kicked your legs.

“Ahh Blaise, put me down! I won’t leave you okay!” You said in between laughter, he was laughing too before setting you down. You didn’t have much time on the ground before Enzo and Theo went to hug you too, crushing you just like Blaise. Laughter filled the room from your squealing. When you were finally released you collapsed onto the bed, feeling winded.

“So, this is how you show your appreciation, by breaking your friends ribs?” You chuckle before leaning on your elbows looking at the boys who were grinning from ear to ear.

“No but we can break other people’s ribs if you need us to” Mattheo said which earned him a slap on his shoulder from you.

“You’re such a boy! And put a shirt on you heathen.” You said as you stuck your tongue out at him which earned some laughter from the others.

“Don’t try to pretend that you don’t enjoy the view.” He said wiggling his eyebrows at you, making you laugh before hitting his head with a pillow. He let out a grunt of shock before grabbing the pillow from your hand making you panic.

“Please don’t hit me I brought you candy!” You said as you braced for impact, but it never came instead you heard a groan from the boy.

“You can’t just pull that card, now I’ll feel bad if I hit you!” He pouted making you let out a breath of relief as the others laughed. Mattheo put the pillow down and went to put a shirt on, to your very secret disappointment. You all hung out in what you learned was Theos dorm, you were snacking and just chatting about anything and everything. It was around 8 in the evening when he tried to kick you out, but he wouldn’t give a reason.

“Ah, Theos girlfriend is coming soon.” Enzo teased as he stood up from his place by the desk, Blaise and Mattheo stood up as well.

“Omg Theo? You never told me you had a girlfriend! Who is she? How long have you been together? How did you meet?” You asked eagerly as you turned to Theo who now looked slightly uncomfortable.

“Well, y/n, we’re not together in uh that sense…” Theo trailed off, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. It took you a moment to realise what he meant you made a face which made the others laugh. Mattheo grabbed your hands to drag you up from your spot on the bed.

“Well, let’s go then darling, let Theo have some fun with his non-girlfriend.” He said with a laugh as you made another face, Enzo and Balise had already left for their own dorms.

“Come on love, it’s just sex, it’s no big deal.” He said with an amused smile on his face.

“It’s not the sex, it’s the way you’re phrasing it!” You said with your nose scrunched, making both Theo and Mattheo chuckle. You shook your head at them as you gave Theo a wave before letting Mattheo drag you out of Theos dorm. Mattheo started to walk towards another door in the hall, he gave you a look as to tell you to follow him before he opened the door and sauntered into what you assumed was his dorm. You followed him in, closing the door behind you, and looked around. His dorm was neat, he had shelves of books and records, you let your fingers trace the backs of them as Mattheo flopped down on his bed, watching you.

“I didn’t know you liked to read?” You said softly as you picked up a copy of the muggle book Moby Dick, turning it over in your hand as you looked at him. He shrugged before putting his arms behind his head.

“I had a lot of time when I was little, I guess the habit just stuck.” He answered your question nonchalantly. You smiled as you put the book back in its place. You sat down on the bed, looking at him.

“What?” He asked curiously, a small smile on his face. You let out a shy laugh before turning your body fully too him.

“You’re full of surprises, Mattheo Riddle.” You said softly.

“Oh yeah? Good or bad?” He asked, a soft smile on his face as he sat up to face you.

“Only good.” You said as you reached out to brush one of his stray curls out of his eyes. The tension from earlier made it’s way back between you. The air turned thick and heavy. Your hand hovered awkwardly by his cheek for a moment before he grabbed it in his larger one. You had shifted closer to him now as his other hand caressed your cheek.

“You really are too good to us, to me.” He murmured as his thumb traced your cheekbone. You didn’t know what to say, you were lost in his chocolate brown eyes, the feeling of his hand against your face, the whole of him. You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. His hand moved to grip the hair in the back of your neck, a soft, yet steady grip as he closed his eyes. He looked like he was in pain as he opened his eyes again. Your heart was thumping loudly in your chest, you would be surprised if he didn’t hear your heartbeat. You don’t know how it slipped out it just did, but the world seemed to stop when you uttered those words.

“Kiss me, Matty.” The restraint he showed earlier completely vanished and his lips were on yours in a soft, passionate kiss. His hands moved to your waist as he lifted you into his lap, so you were straddling him. Your hands found their home in his hair, grabbing the ends of it, making him groan into your lips. His hands moved under your shirt to caress the bare skin of your waist.

“God, you’re so fucking perfect.” He grunted against your lips as he gripped the soft flesh of your hips. He was kissing you again, more intensely this time, his tongue was in your mouth exploring every part of it, hands gripping your hips firmly. He flipped you over mid kiss so that you were laying under him, his arms at either side of your head, and continued to kiss you.

“Fuck, I’ve wanted to do that since I saw you in potions.” He said as he kissed down your neck as you let out small moans. He pulled back to look at you, your hair was fanned out on his pillow as you laid there under him. You were looking up at him with big eyes, lips swollen and red from all the kissing. His hand grabbed your chin as he looked you in the eyes, vulnerability shone in his eyes.

“Please tell me that you’re mine, I can’t kiss you again without knowing that you’re mine.” He said, his voice strained, and your heart stopped. Your eyes widened in shock. Mattheo was known for not doing commitment, yet here he was, asking you to be his.

“What?” You asked, shock evident in your voice.

“Fuck, yes love, all I want is you. I think about you before I go to bed, right after I wake up, I can’t eat, sleep or do anything without you being on my mind. Hell, it was you McLaggen talked about, he didn’t even say anything bad, and I still saw red. You’re fucking perfect, you’re too good for me, yet you make me want to rip my heart out of my chest and give it to you if that’s what it takes for you to be mine, my girlfriend, my whatever you’re willing to be.” He said his eyes closed and his head dipped in the crook of your neck. Your hands pulled his face up so you could look at him. His eyes were searching yours for any sign of anything.

“Do you really mean that, Matty?” You whispered to which he nodded. Your face broke out in a wide smile, his face slowly matching yours.

“Then I’m yours, your girlfriend, as long as you’re mine, my boyfriend.” You said, using his words from just moments before. You have never seen a wider smile on his face before. He leaned down again and gave you the sweetest kiss you’ve ever felt. You spent the rest of the night cuddled up in his bed, kissing, talking, cuddling, Mattheo even read to you at some point of the evening. He read a chapter of Little Women, a muggle novel he said he thought you might like. At some point you fell asleep in his arms, your head comfortably nestled on his chest. It was the best sleep you have had for a long time. When you awoke the next day Mattheo was still holding you, his hand firmly on your waist. He looked so peaceful as he slept, his curls messy, his mouth slightly open as soft snores escaped him. You reached a hand up to caress your boyfriends face, his eyes shot open the second you touched him.

“Sorry” you whispered as you stroked his hair out of his face.

“Please tell me I’m not dreaming.” He rasped, his voice thick with sleep. A blush spread across your cheeks at his voice. You let out a giggle at his words.

“You’re not, Matty.” You said softly before giving him a soft kiss on the lips to which he responded immediately by kissing you back and rolling you over so that he was on top of you. He deepened the kiss groaning at the feeling of your hands in his hair. Before anything else could happen, you were interrupted by his door slamming open.

“Rise and shi-” You heard Blaise say before falling completely silent.

“Sorry mate, we didn’t know you had a girl over.” This was Enzo, you assumed they couldn’t see that it was you based on how Mattheo was over you. He gave you a short smirk before looking back at the three boys who stood in the doorway. When he shifted his position, the boys got a clear view of your face.

“No”

“Fucking”

“Way.” They said in disbelief as they saw you, although fully clothed, under Mattheo, in his bed, in the morning. Mattheo chuckled as you let out an embarrassed laugh. Mattheo rolled off you, making you miss his warmth, and the two of you sat up.

“When did this happen?” Enzo asked and you explained what happened, choosing to leave out some of the more intimate details.

“Look, I’m so happy for you and all but seriously, if you were touchy, feely before I can’t even imagine what it will be like now!” Blaise groaned as you were walking to breakfast, Mattheos arm securely around your waist.

“Do you really think they can get worse?” Theo pondered with a smirk on his face. Mattheo rolled his eyes and gave your waist a squeeze, making you smile as your friends discussed the matter at hand. When you entered the great hall, you didn’t have time to think before you were pulled to the Slytherin table to sit with your boyfriend. You were talking and laughing as you ate your breakfast. You caught Fred and Georges eye, just as you did Theos in the beginning of your friendship, the twins gave you a cheeky wink each and wiggled their eyebrows. Then they leaned over to say something to Hermione and Ginny who were sitting with their backs to you. The girls turned around as saw you sitting with Mattheo, his arm around you waist, they smiled at you and then turned around to talk intently with the twins. You turned your attention back to your boyfriend who were arguing with Theo about something. What you didn’t notice were the looks from Harry and Ron, they saw your genuine smile when you looked at Mattheo, they also saw how Mattheo looked at you like you were the one who hung the stars and the moon. They realised then what a big mistake they made.

They caught up with you when you had left the boys to go change in your dorms, with a promise to join them again once you had freshened up.

“y/n, please wait up.” Harry shouted as they ran up to you. You stopped and turned to them, a wary look on your face.

“Please, y/n we’re really sorry for how we behaved.” Harry said, an apologetic look on his face.

“Yeah, I’m really sorry for saying that you would sleep with anyone who is nice to you, I know you would never do that, you’re like one of the smartest people I know.” Ron said, him too looking apologetic.

“When we heard that Riddle beat up McLaggen for talking about you, we sort of realised that he might not be using you.” Ron added.

“I forgive you.” You said slowly. Harry and Ron straightened.

“You do?” The asked, hopeful.

“Yeah, but what you said really hurt. I miss my friends though.” You said with a smile as you gave them hugs. You walked with them to the common room, joking as you did before all the drama. You filled Hermione and Ginny in on your recent development in your relationship with Mattheo as you went around your dorm to freshen up. You were eager to get to him. When you finally had changed and freshened up you hurried through the castle to the dungeons and when you finally reached your boyfriends dorm you walked in and jumped on him as he was laying on the bed, reading. He let out a grunt as you landed on him.

“What’s got you in such a good mood?” He asked with a smile as he put the book away. You explained what had happened, about how Harry and Ron apologized and how happy it made you that you were finally friends again. Mattheo beamed at you before pulling you in for a kiss, one of many to come. Everything was finally right, and you couldn’t be happier.

[akixxsstuff]

Dating L would be like...

Death Note L Lawliet x gender neutral reader

(I'm aware that the picture says girlfriend but the gender of the reader is not specified in the fic. The pictures were also edited by me).

Fluff // One shot

Summary: L was more like a machine than a human, he was cold, calculated and a "no fun and games" type of person aside from the occasional sarcastic or dry humored comment. L never lost his composure and would repress any emotion he had has a intimidation tactic. He was blunt and wouldn't allow anything or anyone to dethrone him.

However around you, L wasn't quite that...

The task force had suspected you and L were a couple, but whenever anyone asked about it, L would quickly shut down the conversation and went back to his work, saying that it wasn't any of their business. You and L were a couple but he just wanted to keep things secretive and professional since doing otherwise made him feel vulnerable.

He couldn't let his suspect Light know how much you meant to him just in case he used it against him, plus it was just in L's nature to be serective.

However as soon the doors were closed and the task force was gone, he would be nuzzling into your shoulder, whining for attention. He would never stop clinging onto you until he got he's way because in his own words, "I'm also childish and don't like to lose".

Like today for instance:

"Not now Lolly, I've got an appointment to book", you said sighing while L continued kissing your neck and nibbling your ear from behind. "I love you but I do not appreciate your lack of cooperation" L then grumbled.

Lolly was your main pet name for L since it sounded like it was short for lollipop, (and we all know how much L loves those) and sounded similar to his real name, Lawliet. Panda was also another common one since he reminded you of one with his dark eyes and pale skin.

He then kneeled in between your legs with his head resting on your thigh, looking up at you in annoyance in an attempt to guilt trip you, (however he couldn't mask he's pleading eyes). "Lolly I already told you I'm busy, just 10 more minutes okay my love?" you cooed while stroking his cheek. But L didn't care, he picked you up bridal style from your chair and tossed you onto the bed. "Lawliet, you should know of all people how important it is to not have any distractions from your work" you said rasing an eyebrow. "You make a fair point" L says with his thumb on his lip, "But I'm not feeling very empathetic tonight" then he proceeded to smother you with kisses.

Another thing L wouldn't budge on is removing all the cameras and wiring taps from your room, if someone broke in and tired to hurt you he needed to know immediately who was responsible so he could toss them in jail forever. He valued your life way more than his, afterall, he did challenge Kira to kill him live on broadcast.

Your dates were either cafe hopping, picnics in the park, or L trying to teach you tennis. You would always try to get him to wear shoes but he would refuse, saying "I don't like how they feel". "I know but I don't want you to step on a piece of glass and hurt yourself" you would say while kissing his forehead. "I will live" L would reply while blushing from your kiss. You would then sigh and take off your shoes, "Fine, if that's how you want to play" and you both would walk around barefoot.

L absolutely loved when you taunted his number one suspect Light, in fact it was his love language.

"I'm not Kira!" Light would yell.

"You're not a very convincing actor Light, but hey! Maybe they'll give you an academy award in prison just for trying. Light Yagami! Mass murderer tries playing innocent victim!".

As a detective, L would always be analysising people's behaviour and you were no expectation.

"How was your day darling?" L cooed.

"Fine. I'm going to my room".

You say that you're fine Y/N yet you're tone and lack of physical affection would indicate otherwise. Could you be trying to deprive me of your attention as an indirect punishment? What could have I done?

However, you did mention how your work load has increased because of the lack of empyoees, were you stressed from that and simply avoided me to avoid talking about it? I should confront you instead of making any assumptions, it could make matters worse because you might believe that I am deliberately ignoring you.

"Love, I believe I have done something to upset you, please tell me what it is was so I can correct my behaviour. Will you accept this piece of cake as a initial peace offering? If I'm not to blame then please tell me who's bothering you so I can potentially sue them".

[shurisasthmaticgf]

the curls are curling: lando norris x black social media influencer fem! reader

summary: the secret behind why his curls have been consistently looking perfect is revealed.

authors note: i am still very new to formula one so please don't jump me if there is some slight inaccuracies. i did my best to look things up if i wasn't sure about them. this fic isn't based off of any grand prix in particular either. also, this is a work of fiction meaning it's not REAL so please remember that as well! constructive feedback is heavily encouraged and very appreciated 🫶🏽

heat pooled through the open windows of the house as you ran around to try and get yourself ready for the long day ahead. you woke up an hour ago to give yourself two hours to get ready because today was a race weekend. usually, you only needed about an hour to get you and your boyfriend out the door but today you'd gotten up earlier to film a vlog.

the whole social media influencer thing was still fairly new for you, only having started to consistently vlog and post a few months ago. before you'd started dating lando you were posting here and there about your day to day as a university student and intern for a large company in the city. every so often one of your videos got a couple hundred thousand views but you didn't really mind that your other content only got a few likes...that was just how tiktok's algorithm worked.

once you graduated from university and your internship ended you didn't have much to vlog about until you decided to film a race weekend and post it. what you didn't expect was the video to get millions of views and likes overnight. a massive influx of fans followed but you didn't really pay too much mind to the number, this was just something you liked to do and people also liked to watch. with time you ended up opening a youtube channel where you posted longer vlogs and other videos, and tiktok became a place where you posted 1-3 minute clips of your longer videos. one thing you never really did was center your entire vlog around your boyfriend. sure, lando was the entire reason you ended up at races but you were also your own person...that and lando was oddly camera shy when it came to your vlogs so he often wanted you to edit him out if he happened to end up in the frame.

which is how you ended up in your bedroom with your tripod pointed the camera directly at you. you smiled widely, hoping that it masked the fact that you were nearly half asleep, "good morning everyone! it's race day and i'm gonna be taking you along with me. everyone's been asking for a longer race day vlog so i'm here to give you all what you want. first lets get into the fit- these pajamas were sent to me from Brooks Avenue, if you like them you can use the code Y/N for a little discount on your purchase!" you backed up to show off your pink and green pajamas that would have definitely cost an arm an a leg if they hadn't come in a PR package. the matching pink and green satin bonnet on your head slowly slipped down your forehead leaving you to push it back up with an annoyed huff. you explained to the camera once more, "okay and first i'm gonna brush my teeth then do my skincare routine...he's in the shower right now so the lens might get fogged up, sorry in advance." you knocked on the bathroom door to let your boyfriend know you were coming in before pulling your skincare products out of your travel bag. quickly you brushed your teeth with until you felt like you'd gotten rid of every trace of morning breath.

just as you finished your skincare routine, the shower turned off and you slipped out of the bathroom. while lando finished in the bathroom you sat back down at the vanity and situated the camera back in front of you. slowly you slipped the bonnet from your head and untied the silk scarf under it, letting the large twists in your hair fall against your shoulders. to the camera you explained, "it's gonna be really hot today so i'm just gonna pull the twists back with a ribbon and call it a day i think." you pulled a jar of edge control and a brush from your bag and began styling your baby hairs, effortlessly into swirls and swoops. a laugh fell past your lips as you admitted, "honestly the only reason i still do this is so my forehead looks slightly less...megamind-esque in pictures." when you finished you tied another scarf messily around your hairline and began gathering your twists into a ponytail to secure it with a holder and ribbon.

the bathroom door opened and lando walked back into your room, fully dressed but his button down left wide open exposing his bare torso. in his hands he held a blow dryer and two bottles, one leave in conditioner and a gel you'd bought for him a few weeks ago. you finished tying the bow around your ponytail then took the two bottles from him and plugged the blow dryer into the wall. a hand gently pulled on your hand and you looked up to see sleepy smile grace his lips, "good morning, beautiful." you drew closer to him, wrapping your arms around his neck and letting him pull you in by the waist. his head nuzzled into your shoulder as your hand found the back of his head, stroking his hair softly with your fingers you murmured, "hi baby." you could feel the shy smile he wore against your shoulder until you pulled away from him. you pulled a robe from the back of the door and told him, "put this on." he knew most of the reason was so he didn't stain his shirt with hair products but another part of it had to be the fact that his shirt was wide open.

lando sat in front of the camera and you laughed at how awkward he looked compared to normal. you prompted, "baby, say hi to everyone. they ask for you all the time." he stiffly waved a hand in front of the camera and you sighed, "i don't know why you act so funny around my camera but everyone else it's fine." he mumbled a soft, "because it's you..." but only the mic on the camera caught it. he sat on the bench in front of you and slightly leaned back into your body before letting his eyes flutter shut.

meanwhile you showed the leave in conditioner to the camera, "this is the kinky curly knot today leave in-" despite his eyes being shut lando let out a small laugh and you asked, "what?" he mumbled cheekily, "kinky." you let out a exasperated sigh, "oh god you're like a child...anyways i was saying, i put a little of this in his hair but not too much just a tiny amount to add moisture." squeezing the leave in conditioner into your palm then applying it to his hair you hummed along to a sza song that ran through your head. the gentle work of your fingers running along his scalp nearly lulled lando back to sleep. you worked through his hair with a practiced ease, adding product and coaxing the curls atop his head to take perfect shape. not wanting to disturb his peace, you silently showed the matching brand's curling custard and then applied that lightly to his hair. once you'd finished you turned on the blow dryer, accidentally jump scaring your boyfriend under you. a soft melodic laugh fell past your lips and one hand fell to his shoulder before you leant down and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek, "my bad babe." the camera didn't miss the way he leaned into your touch, pushing his cheek closer to you with his shoulders dropping further in relaxation.

not even half an hour later you were done and the light brown curls on his head were perfectly defined. you wiped your hands on the hand towel you'd slung over your shoulder earlier and laughed when you realized your boyfriend literally fell asleep. you gently cupped under his chin and pressed another kiss to his cheek. just above a whisper you mumbled, "all done, bubs. " he opened his eyes and smiled while you mused, “my pretty boy.” his cheeks flushed slightly, “thank you” and you brushed a few curls into place before looking at his reflection, "of course." he stood up and pulled you out of the frame to gave you a quick kiss before going downstairs where you'd meet him when you finished getting dressed.

the white and navy blue floral sundress you wore was both nice and simple enough to wear for today. simple gold jewelry and a pair of white sandals finished off your look and you grabbed the camera to show your reflection in the full length mirror on the wall, "all dressed so i'm gonna go meet lando downstairs and i'll see you all a little bit later!" you stopped recording and went downstairs to find your boyfriend sitting and ready to go, his cheeks burning pink when he laid eyes on you. a subtle fluttering erupted in your stomach at the familiar gaze, the one that made you feel like the only girl in the world.

*extra*

you scrolled through your social media accounts, something you never really did if you didn't have to. the first thing that came to your attention was the flood of pictures and comments that were about your boyfriend's hair. for the past few races you'd been doing his hair and more and more fans were noticing it looked better than normal. honestly, you found it amusing that people were bringing it up and so much at that, so you decided to add to the conversation just a bit:

fans reactions to recent vlog upload:

[muffinlance]

EMERGENCY FANFIC PROTOCOLS: ACTIVATED

Hey while AO3 is down

Here is a GDrive link to all my downloaded fics (it's OVER 9,000 2,000)

Mostly Avatar, also The Magnus Archives, Danny Phantom, Teen Wolf, and a few others

Mostly unsorted, some not even intentionally downloaded because the auto-downloader I use is Like That, so consider this a glorified "give me a random fic" button

MAKE SURE TO KUDOS THE AUTHORS WHEN AO3 IS BACK UP

>>> Linkie link <<<

Edit: Note that when AO3 comes back up that link will go dead again... until it's needed, once more

EMERGENCY FANFIC PROTOCOLS: DEACTIVATED

...Until next they are needed

If you were going through these for fic recs, check out my AO3 Bookmarks for the more curated list.

To make your own fanfic backups, I recommend AO3 Downloader or FanFicFare. (I'm not tech support for either; please don't message me for help.)

Happy reading!

[ckret2]

Chapter 46 of human Bill Cipher frantically wishing he was still locked in the Mystery Shack and not getting his wish:

The Eclipse: Part 4

Gravity has fully disappeared from Gravity Falls and Bill finally learns why the Axolotl traveled all the way to Earth to see him. And meanwhile, Ford's in mortal peril.

[SUPER IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE: if you're reading this, it means that I've edited chapters 6&7 to make them compatible with The Book Of Bill but I have not edited this chapter yet.

Before TBOB came out, in chapter 7 I wrote that the Ax's deal with Bill was "I'll give you a different form (a human body) in a different time (dropping you a thousand years in the future) so you don't have to see your old enemies" and then Bill stole a time tape to come right back to the 21st century. I've now edited ch 6&7 to make the Ax's deal with Bill "I'll drop you off in Theraprism" and then Bill escaped via reincarnation.

However, this chapter refers to the OLD version of ch 7. That's because there are not physically enough hours in my life for me to do all the editing I want to do as fast as I want to do it.

Things Bill & the Axolotl say in this chapter contradict TBOB and contradict what the new ch 6&7 say. The conversation they're having DOES NOT accurately reflect the fic's current plot. Don't freak out. I'll fix it when I can. - (note added Sept 7, 2024; will be removed when it's no longer necessary.)]

####

There were only two ways to remove a pair of magic friendship bracelets. Either both wearers had to consent to removing the bracelets; or one of the parties had to die. The bracelets weren't active if they were only being worn by one person, and a corpse wasn't a person.

The moment Dipper's soul left his body, the thread connecting the bracelets turned visible again.

Bill immediately yanked off his bracelet. He considered just letting it go, reconsidered considering that Dipper's ghost would probably tattle to Mabel, and carefully, slowly reeled the thread in. Without the magic active, it was just normal embroidery floss. The Axolotl's gravitational pull didn't make Dipper's body heavy enough to break the line, but if Bill jerked it just a little too hard, it would snap.

Bill heaved a sigh when the body was close enough he could grasp its wrist. He grabbed Dipper's head and snarled in his dead face, "This is why I told you to get in the cave." He wrapped the bracelet around and around the tree trunk and Dipper's forearm, muttering to himself, "But does anybody listen to the all-knowing immortal dream demon who's seventy times older than their entire universe? No! No, what could it possibly know! Surely we'll get better ideas from the brain-damaged hick who married a raccoon—"

An immense voice said, "Hello."

Bill froze. He slowly turned away from the beast above Gravity Falls.

The voice said serenely, "Look at me, you 8-karat coward."

He slowly turned toward the beast above Gravity Falls. He swallowed hard, steeled himself, and dragged his gaze up until he met the Axolotl's eye and he was gently tugged into the time and space between time and space. "Oh, heyyy," he squeaked. He forced a pained smile. "Didn't see you there! Haha, hi! Wow! Imagine running into you in this dimension on this planet, crazy."

"Yes, crazy," the Axolotl agreed.

"This isn't a regular part of your commute! I guess you've got some time off," Bill said. "Work must be going well!"

"Pretty well. I scheduled an extended lunch break," the Axolotl said amiably. "How's being human going?"

Bill shot the Axolotl a dirty look.

The Axolotl continued to give him a perpetual smile. "Happy New Year, by the way."

"I'll kill you."

"No you won't."

"Okay look, let's just cut to the chase," Bill said. "Go on. Tell me my punishment."

"Punishment?"

"For! Coming back here instead of staying when you dumped me in 3012. I skipped time while on parole. That's obviously why you're here." He looked down, shielding his face with a hand and squeezing his eyes shut. "So stop wasting my time and tell me how much trouble I'm in. I'm a busy guy, I don't wanna drag this out."

"Well," the Axolotl said, "it appears to me that you're locked in your enemies' home, you can't use doors, and you need to be handcuffed to a child to go outside. Is that enough 'trouble' for you?"

Bill opened one eye. "Wait, so." He looked up skeptically. "You're saying I won't get re-executed for breaking the rules. Or—or get stuck in a worse body."

"No," the Axolotl said. "You'll answer to no jailer's voice; what you do now is your own choice. I moved you by a thousand years to free you from your killers' fears. If you decide then to return, it's your own second chance you burn."

"Ohhh. See, I assumed this entire situation was a... prison... thing. Considering the..." He gestured vaguely at his body. "The flesh prison." 

"It's a body. Not a prison. You aren't being imprisoned."

"'Not a prison' my base, if it's not a prison then why can't—" He caught himself before he asked a question, and took a deep breath. "So, there are no rules against coming right back to where I left off."

"Though I think your plan is clunky—not my circus, not my monkey."

"Oh. Okay, great." Bill planted his hands on his hips, straightening up properly for the first time since the Axolotl's arrival. "Huh. How 'bout that. Spent the last two days worrying for nothing!"

"You? Worried?"

"Of course not, I wasn't worried for a second," Bill said. "So if you're not here to punish me—that doesn't explain why you are here."

"Are you asking?"

"You know I'm not."

The Axolotl stared at Bill, patiently awaiting a question. Bill stared at the Axolotl, patiently not asking one.

The Axolotl caved first. "I wanted to make sure you hadn't burned down the dimension yet."

Bill pointed sharply at the Axolotl. "Hey! Hey!"

The Axolotl gave him a look like a toothless gumball learning how to smile.

"Not funny! Seriously, now!"

"I came because you called."

"Wh— When did—?" Bill cut himself off. He thought back to the day he'd spent locked in the bathroom. He recalled the desperate plea for salvation he'd painted on the ceiling. He buried his face in his hand. "That... that was a joke. False alarm."

"I gathered," the Axolotl said.

Bill peeked between his fingers. "But, I did call for rescue. Therefore. You're here to rescue me."

"No."

"Why n—! You said I'm not supposed to be in a prison! You've seen what these humans have done to me!"

"You aren't a prisoner," the Axolotl said. "You're a kidnapping victim. That's outside my jurisdiction."

Infuriating—but it told Bill something important: in the Axolotl's eyes, Bill's captivity wasn't just. And Bill didn't consider the Axolotl any kind of god—he didn't consider anyone any kind of god—but the Ax had a lot of pull in the multiverse when it came to defining the universal concept of justice. That was promising. 

"But I do have a keen interest in your case. I wanted to check in on your progress."

Bill gave the Axolotl a questioning look. "'Progress.'"

The Axolotl said nothing. Bill waited. The Axolotl simply continued to smile. "You haven't asked a question yet. Usually you can't wait to get rid of me."

"Under the circumstances," he gestured again at his body, "I didn't think I could afford to waste it."

"I see. However, I do have a meeting I need to get to."

What was the most important thing he could ask. What did he need to know the most. "So... if I learn my lesson or complete my sentence or—whatever I'm supposed to do... will you turn me back into a triangle?"

"I can't and won't do anything else. I've completed my obligation to you," the Axolotl said. "Whatever happens to you from now on is up to you."

That could mean anything from "you're stuck as a human forever and will die in less than a century" to "there's a secret spell on you and when you meet its conditions you'll automatically turn back into a triangle" to "you're already a triangle, you just need to believe in yourself." All Bill knew was that he wasn't getting any help from the Ax.

"It's been a pleasure as always," the Axolotl said. The world slowly began to move again as he gently returned Bill to the dimension he'd come from.

"Wait!" Bill called. He needed to know—was he still a triangle, somewhere on the inside, buried beneath all this flesh and bone? Or had the Axolotl's transformation rotted him to his core—was he now nothing but a human through and through? If he wasn't being punished, why had his suffocating soul been smothered under a blanket of meat? If he wasn't being punished, why had his own corpse stared him in the eye as if it didn't recognize him? "Just one more question before you go!"

"If you have the time. Up to you."

If he had the time? Bill's eyes darted around. Why wouldn't he have the time, what was he missing—?

His gaze locked on Ford. Floating twenty, thirty feet out from the cliff's edge. Oh.

Bill let the Axolotl's gravity drag him to the edge of the cliff before digging a hand into the ground, holding himself in place. Bill was safe; Dipper's body was safe, and his soul could float home once the Axolotl was gone. But when the Axolotl was gone, gravity would immediately come back—0 to 100, just like that—and Ford was dead.

And the Axolotl was already turning away. The millions of axolotls in the water below followed, moving through and out of the lake as though the lakebed didn't exist, migrating in the Axolotl's wake.

Ford was unsuccessfully trying to swim through the air back to land. Several useless feet of cable from his infinity belt floating around him from trying to fling it at the cliff. The best he could do was stretch an arm toward land.

He met Bill's eyes. The only other time Bill had seen Ford this terrified was when he'd threatened to torture the kids.

Bill looked at Ford, looked at the Axolotl—nearly too far to shout to—and looked down. By now, the future death he'd witnessed earlier was so close that Bill could see more than the blood to be left on the rocks. He could see the body—gray hair, tan overcoat, broken. It was just a few moments away.

Stanford Pines was about to die. Bill Cipher was innocent. Dipper was his witness; Dipper, honest goody hero type, could verify that Bill not only repeatedly told them both to stay away from the thing in the sky, but also warned them to anchor themselves right before totality. Everyone at the shack knew he'd protested, knew he'd warned them, knew he'd begged to stay home. There was no possible way Bill could get blamed for this.

And once Ford was dead, none of the idiots in this town would ever find a way to destroy Bill.

Up to you.

Bill didn't stop to think.

He kicked off the edge of the cliff.

He could see, hovering in the air like a golden arc amidst a dozen blurry failures, the path he needed to jump to reach Ford. The Axolotl's tail was already soaring over the town, his sky blue fins rippling like vast, slow sails. If Bill reached Ford before the Axolotl's influence was completely gone, he could fly them over the lake and they might both survive. 

They collided. Bill had to fling an arm over Ford's shoulder before he managed to get a grip on his lapel; Ford seized Bill's hoodie in both hands. Ford demanded, "What are you—?" He fell silent as their trajectory took a sudden sharp turn from south to east.

"The lake!"

Ford nodded. Why could come if they both survived. He could already feel weight grabbing onto his limbs. He spared a split-second glance down, but with half the lake floating in the air he couldn't tell if they'd cleared its banks yet. "Have you ever learned to swim?"

"You have to learn?!"

Ford prayed, if Bill drowned, that he was a mortal, and that he wasn't the kind of drowner who dragged other people down with him. "Cross your ankles as tightly as you can, cross your arms over your chest, land feet first in the water—better to break your legs than your neck—do not tilt your head, eyes on the horizon—" And that was as much emergency survival advice as he could give before gravity returned in full force.

This wasn't the first time Ford had plummeted into a deep liquid from an irresponsible height over the past thirty years. The hit was softer than he expected—the turbulent lake hadn't settled back down into its normal water pressure—but he also sank far deeper than he expected. Streams of bubbles raced past his vision; maybe it was just the power of suggestion, but he could have sworn they looked like transparent axolotls.

As soon as he had his wits about him, he threw off his coat, tugged off his boots, and kicked his way toward the surface.

Bill didn't.

This actually wasn't so bad, he thought, with a calmness that definitely came from being such a rational level-headed fellow and not from being in shock. Sure, all the air had been forced out of his lungs and his body was screaming in airless panic, but he wasn't his body, was he? This felt just like floating. He would miss floating again.

What was he supposed to do now.

He'd seen humans swim. He tried kicking his legs. He felt stupid. But, he decided—again, with a calmness that definitely was not from shock—that looking kinda stupid was probably preferable to drowning. Although he was curious what drowning felt like. Had he ever drowned a puppet before? He couldn't remember. Didn't seem bad so far.

He surfaced.

Ford was already on shore, on hands and knees, desperately coughing out water, his lungs burning. He collapsed in the sand. It took a couple minutes for him to reach the point where he was breathing more than he was coughing, and another minute of heavy breathing before he had the energy to look at the lake again. Bill was floating on his back about fifty feet away, very still.

Ford croaked, "Bill," coughed again, and tried a little louder. "Bill?"

Without otherwise moving, Bill raised one arm and gave him a thumbs-up.

Ford dug into what energy reserves he still had, shuffled back into the water, and swam over to Bill. "Are you all right?"

Bill gave him a dazed look, opened his mouth, and exhaled a cup of water. Then he started coughing. 

Ford grimaced. "Let's... get to shore." He took Bill's arm to tug him toward dry land.

Bill flailed upright and shoved him off. "Don't—" Hack. "M'fine. I l—" Cough. "I like floating." He lay on his back, shut his eyes, and said shakily, "Don't touch me."

Ford treaded water for a moment, considering that. Bill looked like he'd got the hang of floating enough that he wasn't an immediate drown risk, so Ford said, "I'll... be on land."

"'Kay."

Ford swam to shore and sat cross-legged in the wet sand to wait, staring down at his hands. The Handwitch's ring was a bright indigo blue again, no traces of darkness within the cabochon, as though the lake water had washed it clean.

Should he go do something useful? There weren't many places Bill could go, except to shore; it wasn't like he was at risk of escaping. But then if Bill did make it to land while Ford was distracted, he had a chance to make a run for it without the bracelet—

Ford stood up. "Bill! Where's Dipper?!"

Bill raised one arm and pointed up.

Ford looked at Gravity Peak. A small speck high above, Dipper was looking down over the cliff's edge. Ford waved to him. Dipper waved back. Well. That was inconvenient. Maybe Ford could restrain Bill with the infinity belt's cable in the meantime. (He reeled the cable in while he was thinking about it. He was fortunate it hadn't tangled on anything while he was underwater.)

"We have to rendezvous with Dipper. Get over here."

"Just leave me."

"Not an option."

Bill let out a pitiable whine, but, after a moment, managed to figure out a way to slowly paddle-kick his way toward land.

When his heels hit sand, he rolled over, crawled onto land, and lay down. "Gravity," he groaned. "I hate gravity."

"I'm not too fond of it myself right now." Ford's limbs felt like lead. Some combination of spending a day and a half in steadily reduced gravity, the exhaustion following a near death experience, and waterlogged clothes. "Where are the enchanted bracelets?"

Bill lifted one hand from the elbow and pointed toward the cliff again.

That'd be just Ford's luck. All the same, he said, "Really?" Bill would hide them if they were on him.

"Yes, really. Whaddaya want, a strip search?" He gestured vaguely toward his body without lifting his head. "Go ahead. 'M not moving to help." His arm flopped back down.

Ford decided that was a bluff he did not want to call. "Fine. We'll put them back on when we rendezvous with Dipper." If Bill tried to escape, Ford wasn't sure he was in any condition to chase; but then Bill didn't seem to be in any condition to run, either.

"Surprised you wanna wear matching bracelets with me. If I'd known, I woulda made you a friendship bracelet." Under his breath, Bill muttered at the sand, "But m'sure it'd've been a waste of thread."

Ford decided it was more prudent to hold his tongue. "Can you walk?"

"If I have to." For as difficult as Bill made getting to his feet look, one would think he was being subjected to the gravity of Jupiter. Ford offered his hand; Bill smacked it aside.

"Well. My raft is still in the cave behind Trembley Falls, so we'll have to borrow a boat." Ford pointed toward Tate & Backle's Bait & Tackle at the far end of the lake. "Think you can make it that far?"

Bill—barefoot, soggy, and slumped like he had the whole weight of the world on his shoulders—gave Ford the most pathetic look he'd ever seen Bill wear. Ford empathized completely. But Bill only sighed and said, "Let's get going."

####

Tate lowered his magazine to give Ford a critical look. "Dr. Pines," he said. "You get caught out on the lake when the gravity came back?"

"Something like that."

He shook his head. "Shoulda listened to the news."

"The news?"

"Dad's been making public warnings since yesterday. 'Stay anchored and keep your head down.' Reckon you must've missed it."

"We've... been camping." He'd have to ask Fiddleford about that later. "Listen—do you have a boat we could borrow? It's an emergency. We were separated from Dipper and we have to get across the lake."

Tate raised his hat just enough to give Ford a look that told him exactly what he thought of his merit as a guardian—Ford figured he deserved that—but then stood with a sigh. "All right, I'll see what we've got."

He paused, then gestured behind Ford with his chin. "Who's the lady?"

Ford turned. The shop's door was propped open and Bill was leaning in the doorway, arms crossed tight, staring blankly out across the lake. "Er—Goldie. She's... staying in the shack a few weeks."

"Hm." Tate raised his voice. "Ma'am?"

Bill didn't budge.

"Ma'am—Miss Goldie?"

That time he turned to give Tate a faraway look. "Me?"

"Yes, uh—you're soaked to the bone. Would you like to borrow some dry clothes?"

"Oh." Bill considered the question for a little longer than necessary. "If you want."

Ford explained, "She inhaled a lot of water."

Tate nodded. "Think we've got some out-of-season stock in the back, there might be something big enough for..." He caught himself before insinuating something about a lady's weight, and mumbled, "Well, it'll do." He headed to a door behind the counter, paused, looked Ford over, and reluctantly said, "I s'pose you can get something too."

####

Tate had a motorboat in good working order, so he let them borrow it, with a stern request to have it back by the end of the day. And so they set out—Ford in waders that went up to his chest, a bandana he really hoped was keeping his embarrassing neck tattoo hidden, and a t-shirt that said "The worst day of fishing is better than the best day of court-ordered anger management classes"; and Bill in a makeshift skirt Tate had apologetically improvised out of a beach towel, a sweater depicting a pine tree constructed out of fish that said "MERRY FISHMAS", and a pair of novelty slippers shaped like rainbow trout.

"I'm never giving these shoes back," Bill informed Ford as they crossed the lake. "I don't care whether we buy them or steal them. They're hilarious." It was the nearest thing to personality Bill had demonstrated since landing in the lake.

Ford supposed he was in no position to tell Bill he couldn't keep them, considering that Bill had... well.

Well.

Ford should say something about that. He didn't know what. He didn't know where to start. (Bill's question came back to him: if Ford didn't believe anything Bill said, why did he keep trying to pry information out of him?)

(Because, he realized—beneath thirty years of every nerve in his body screaming "DON'T TRUST HIM"—part of him was still hoping Bill would say something he could believe.)

Ford cleared his throat. "It's... impressive that you didn't panic while you were underwater," he said awkwardly. "That must have taken remarkable self control."

"Oh. Eh." Bill spread his hands vaguely. "I wasn't really paying attention to what was happening. I was thinking about other stuff."

Ford blinked. "While you were drowning?"

"It wasn't a very severe drowning."

Ford huffed.

This was probably a conversation he should have later—Bill's brain only appeared to be half on—but, if they had it later, Ford wasn't sure he'd get anything but yet another polished lie. 

And so he steeled his nerves and asked, "Why did you save me."

Bill didn't answer. He stared silently at his rainbow trout slippers.

"Bill—?"

"Hold on," he said. "I don't know, just—give me a minute to make something up."

It was the first time in a month and a half—the first time in years—that Ford was absolutely certain Bill had just told him the truth.

And not just about his intentions to lie to Ford—but about not knowing why he'd saved him.

It meant there was no secret master plan, no manipulative ulterior motives, no cunning illusions. It meant Bill had endangered himself just to save Ford.

There was a universe where Ford then said, "I didn't think you meant it all those times you said you wanted to be my friend again," and where Bill lied—both to Ford and to himself—"I didn't think I meant it either." It wasn't this universe, because neither one of them wanted those words out in the world. Yet they still hovered around them, unspoken.

It didn't make Ford trust Bill. It didn't make Ford like Bill. Bill was still everything he'd ever been—liar, conman, tyrant, torturer—and Ford still hated him for all of it.

But. It meant that for the first time in a month in a half, a muscle between Ford's shoulder blades that had been knotted tight with fear could finally loosen and relax.

Ford was safe.

####

(I first had the idea for this chapter nearly a year ago and I've been dying waiting to post it. I hope you enjoyed, and I can't wait to hear what y'all think! And to those of you in the path of totality, happy solar eclipse this Monday! I totally planned it this way. I did not.)

[oceansblvds]

not allowed — satoru gojo

pairing ; sensei!satoru gojo x student!reader

words ; 7.6k (my bad)

about ; you're given your first solo mission with your sensei gojo overlooking to make sure anything doesn't go wrong. both of you are aware that being borderline obsessed with the other is wrong, but who liked rules anyway?

warning(s) ; smut, oral (fem receiving), p in v sex, age gap but both are consenting adults, gojo may be a little ooc but support my delusions anyway, my yapping, not edited, longing? i don't fucking know.

author's note ; okay okay hi! this is different from my normal content but i've been obsessed with jjk recently and i have gojo brainrot. so consider this my beginning of many fics to come. feel free to request!

YOU HADN’T EVER BEEN ON A MISSION ALONE WITH YOUR SENSEI BEFORE. It was . . . Odd. Typically, one of your other classmates would accompany you along with your Sensei in order to encourage similar teachings. Though this time it seemed as though this mission was something that was matched to you, up your sleeve given your technical curse usage, and it was to be something that you did with the guidance of Satoru Gojo, and he was only allowed to intervene if you were going to get severely harmed. The town that you were assigned to, with a cursed spirit seemingly murdering children who went out into the sea too late at night, was a sleepy little town. You were sure that this was the first time that they had ever experienced turmoil like this, and they were happy to allow you and your Sensei to ‘investigate’ the murders. As you parked the car in the parking lot, you looked around, seeing several townspeople watch as you stepped outside of the drivers side of the road, Satoru out on the passengers side, both dressed in dark black clothing. He had made a joke about how he didn’t trust you driving at all, yet insisted that he wasn’t the one to get you two down there. 

I don’t drive myself places. 

Yeah, well, then he would put up with your driving after all. 

“I can feel your apprehension,” Your Sensei told you, walking in front of you up the stone stairs that came up to the front door of the place you would be staying in with him. Behind you was nothing but your car in the empty lot, the people watching getting uninterested as Gojo pulled out a key and began fiddling with the lock. Damn thing looked as though it had rusted at least three times over. You couldn’t wait to hear him complain about how you two should’ve been granted luxury. You hadn’t even been inside yet and you were already thinking about what he was going to say. The town was so small that there weren’t any hotels, the nearest one over an hour away, meaning that you would have to live in one of these larger homes on the beach for the time being. There wasn’t to be any distractions either, it was supposed to be a pretty open and shut case. Find the curse, exorcize it. It wasn’t that high of a grade anyways, or so you were told by your overachieving Sensei. 

If only people  knew that it didn’t matter if there was no one other than your Sensei to engage with, because Satoru Gojo, alone, was able to distract you for hours on end if you really put your mind to it. Satoru and you were very similar in age, early adult years, and yet he had the role of Sensei and you were still just a Student. You knew that it was because of his efforts of expelling Suguru Geto from the plane of existence, and that alone was enough to grant him the title of Special Grade Sorcerer, but it still was awkward at points when he talked down on you, because really, he had only four years more experience in life than you did.

You did what you were told. You always did. As a younger student you had a temper, a rebellious streak that for a time was almost concerning for the Jujutsu community that taught you. And yet, here you were, a respectful young sorcerer. Over the years you have grown, probably more than any other student that the community had seen, or at least, since your Sensei himself. It was like overnight somehow you turned from a child to a young woman, and you were adamant about completing your studies so that you could become a Special Grade. Those plans, however, were way easier said than done. You still had to work very hard to even get to the level of Gojo’s left hand in terms of strength and ability. But oh did you want it. You wanted all that power, and that was probably why he was so keen on teaching you, why he brought you on this mission in the first place. 

You were just like him, in a lot of ways. 

Satoru was not entirely a man of secrets. You could ask him things about almost anything and he would tell you. The only thing that he kept guarded in the deepest parts of his mind was things of his past, and his reasoning behind making such vast decisions like he oh so loved to do. But you and Satoru still managed to be very close, the cursed energy growing strong between both of you as if it too agreed in your compatibility.

You shook your head, immediately refuting his accusations. “No, it’s not apprehension,” you told him, eyes coming up to meet the back of his head since he wasn’t looking at you. “Just concern, that’s all.”

“That’s all?” Your Sensei questioned. The second that his foot came up to the top of the stairs, his figure turned around and faced you, those bold, blue eyes from under his black mask looking at you even if you couldn’t see it, you could definitely feel them there. “If you have any doubts about anything, tell me, I am your Sensei after all.” He loved calling himself that. 

That’s exactly that problem, you thought to yourself, making sure that your mental shields were up to guard it so that it wasn’t written all over your face. That was the last thing that you needed, for him to know the things that you wished to push down into the darkest depths of your mind. The thought of simply just being with him here alone made your brain almost electrify yourself, thinking about all the possibilities of slipping up and revealing all your emotions towards your Sensei directly to him. It was something to fear, and yet you were not allowed to fear, you couldn’t fear someone like him who was supposed to teach her. 

You offered him the fakest smile that you could muster, saying, “Yes, I’m alright. Let’s just get inside, it’s almost dark.” The setting sun was directly to your back, illuminating him in front of you like he was something to be marveled at. And to your defense, Satoru Gojo was definitely something to be marveled at. His chiseled cheeks only looked more distinguished in the golden light, along with his silver-esque blonde hair that seemed to catch it just right. It made you feel weak in the knees, these thoughts of him, and you knew it was wrong to think of him in such ways - but you just couldn’t stop. Every time you tried to vilify him in your mind, another reason why you should love popped right back up in its place. It was a deadly cycle that you have shamelessly fallen victim to, and there was nothing that you could do to stop it or further this attraction. It was forbidden. He was your teacher.

The moment that you stepped into the building, a sigh left your lips, eyes taking in all your surroundings. It was marvelous. There were marbled stone floors that were covered in rugs in some places, plush couches in the middle of the room, and off to the side were the counters of the kitchen, all looking as if no one had ever stepped foot in here. Suddenly you felt out of place here, like you weren’t good enough to live in such a lavish way. After all, your dorm room at the school was nothing compared to this. They were bland, sandy and brown colors everywhere. Only a dresser with a small mirror and a bed were in it. Yet here, there were different hues of reds, greens, and blues, tables and chairs and fancy lamps, and plants that added almost another dimension to the already breathtaking house.

“It’s - It’s,” You started, not able to find the correct words for what you were trying to say.

Luckily, Gojo finished your sentence, “Breathtaking. It’s breathtaking.”

You turned to look back at him, taking in his features for just a moment more.

Breathtaking, you thought to yourself. Yes, everything here is just breathtaking.

-

The soft silks of your bed sheets rolled between your fingers, tempting you to lay into bed and never get back up. How on Earth were you supposed to find this curse when you were living like this? You could imagine yourself, not as a sorcerer but as a normal person, eating wild berries as you sat on your bed near the balcony, looking towards the horizon and not having one single worry in that head of yours. It was tantalizing, the perfect picture in your mind of what you wished to be.

“Why do you have that dumbfounded look on your face?”

You spun around to only be met with Satoru, who was leaning against your doorframe effortlessly. Has he always been that tall? A heat rose up to your cheeks, realizing that you hadn’t been taking the proper precautions of keeping those thoughts only to yourself, it was written all over your face. They were just little flings of ideas, nothing too brash that could get you into any trouble. “I shouldn’t have been thinking of slacking off when we have work to do in the coming days.”

A chuckle escaped his lips from deep within his chest. “It’s okay, Y/N, really, if I am being honest, I was thinking the same not too long ago.”

That was shocking news to you. You always thought that Gojo always wanted to be on the run, as if this trip that he had to take with you was annoying to him because he had to take time away from much more special missions that he would get to be the leader of. But it also made sense, even victorious Special Grade Sorcerers get tired sooner or later. Perhaps you didn’t know him as much as you thought that you did. This trip wasn’t just for you, it was for the both of you. It was good to go back to basics, even for someone as powerful as him. 

“And here I was thinking that you didn’t want to be here,” You mused.

Satoru laughed at your jest. “No, quite the opposite. It’ll be nice to take a step back from life for a little bit and get to watch you do all the work.”

“I didn’t know that Satoru Gojo knew what rest meant,” You continued on with your playful banter.

“I don’t,” He chuckled. “Maybe you can teach me?”

Now that sends you through a loop. You knew that he was probably just playing around with you, since you were teasing him a little bit. But that sentence was enough for that place in your mind to unlock all the fantasies you had in your head about him, the ones that you only dared touch when you knew you were alone and it was the dead of night. You held yourself back from becoming flustered, knowing the moment you showed any signs of it that he would know that something was up. Instead you simply nodded your head, taking your eyes off of him to the balcony that was open to your room, seeing the way that the moonlight illuminated the waves of the water. “Perhaps after investigating tomorrow, we could go by the water?” You asked him.

“Sure thing,” Satoru said, turning on his heel and making his way out of your room. You took a sigh of relief at his absence, not because you wanted him gone, but because seeing him in such a leisurely setting was starting to get to your head. That dizzy feeling that got to your head every time you looked at him for too long started to subside, and you were left with only your thoughts as you put away some clothes you packed for the stay.

The moment that your head hit the soft, plush pillow of your large bed, you were completely enveloped by sleep. In your dreams you only saw you and Satoru, happy and smiling in the gracious flower fields you had passed on the way here, preparing meals together half dressed in the kitchen, and falling asleep in each other’s arms. It was so real and lifelike that when you woke up in the morning, you felt as if you had awoken from an alternate universe.

-

Satoru didn’t know what he was doing.

Of course he was excited to be able to take a break from the long days of having to deal with the stupid fucking orderlies at the school, but at the same time he knew that being alone with you was going to be a struggle for him. Gojo loved to train you, he really did. You were a loyal student and was eager to learn from his instruction. He knew the moment that he saw you that he wanted to train you. But he hadn’t prepared for him to become so emotionally attached to you, and it was tearing the young teacher apart. 

It was incredibly taboo of him to gain these feelings for two reasons. One: he should really learn to teach other people so that he wasn’t spending all his time giving all of his ‘wisdom’ (as he liked to call it) to you. Two: you were his student. It may have been different if you were within the same ranks as him, but you were not. He was supposed to be your teacher, and there was no way that he would take advantage of his position of power over you if you were not willing.

He, too, was having doubts about this mission. Satoru almost asked Nanami if he would accompany the two of you for as long as it took, but there was too much going on for him to take any time off from his job, and Satoru was sure that it was just an excuse so that he didn’t have to tolerate him more than necessary anyways. So it was just you and him, alone in this house in this beautiful town.

The next day rolled along and you two had spent most of it investigating, talking to locals, etc. It was incredibly boring for him, though part of him felt incredibly proud that you were able to do everything on your own without any hiccup. You two had devised a plan for tomorrow to go after the curse directly from the source: a small cove near some cliffs by the beach. You would go at night and hopefully be able to catch it before it brought in any more deaths into the waves. 

He was so engrossed in his own head that he didn’t even realize you had walked up to him. 

“You promised we could go to the water afterwards,” You told him, hoping that you were jogging his memory from last night.

But you didn’t need to jog Satoru’s memory, because he had been thinking about it ever since you asked. Thinking about having to watch you submerge under the water and come back up, drops of clear blue dripping down your exposed shoulders, and keeping himself from doing something that he would most likely regret when you would reject him, scolding him for his thinking. He thought about the way he wanted to put his hands on your hips and pull you as close as you possibly could get to him, taking the opportunity to pepper kisses along your smooth skin. It killed him to think that you probably didn’t think the same way about him, it was going to goddamn tear him apart.

Nevertheless, he wasn’t going to go back on his promise to you. It was the least he could do after thinking such sinful things about you. Gojo gave you a nod and walked beside you on the short trail to the ocean from the house you were staying at. You could hear the water ripple towards the small shoreline, coming up and then receding back again in a timely fashion. You kicked off your shoes, deciding that your tank top and pants were okay to get wet, especially since you wouldn’t take the risk of undressing in front of Satoru. As much as the thought was tempting, you knew better than to test your luck. He watched with intensity as you got into the water, going deep enough to where only the tops of your shoulders and up were exposed. Fuck, he cursed himself, did you have to look so good barely doing anything?

You cocked your head to the side. “Well … are you going to get in or just stare at me?” You asked, immediately submerging yourself under the water to ignore what he had to say about your teasing. Your heart thumped profusely as you sat there under the water holding your breath. Satoru had been looking at you.

He mentally cursed himself once again, taking his shoes off and following you into the water. It did feel good, the water having an almost calming effect over him as he walked deeper in the lake. He looked around him, taking in the appearance of all the beautiful trees that lined up, beautiful fruit hanging off of the branches. Little flowers were along the bay, facing right towards him as if they were welcoming him to their home.

The sun spilled harsh rays along his skin, causing Gojo to dip his head down fully into the water. Once he came back up for air, his eyes shifted over to you, both of you holding a type of eye contact that you swore almost knocked your breath out. It was unlike anything you had ever experienced before, like he was looking right into your soul and you to his, a sense of desire burning a pit in your stomach. Feeling exposed, you shifted your gaze to the fish swimming in the water near you. You could still feel his eyes on you, in them holding truths that he wished to tell you, but being unable to put the words together to explain.

-

“There’s something that you’re not telling me.”

Your eyes opened at your Sensei’s voice and looked directly at him. You had been simply laying on your bed before sleeping, on your phone, trying to distract yourself with something dumb online before being able to sleep. You had only just closed your eyes as he walked in. At school they usually kept you on some kind of schedule, though here with Satoru, rules were a little - no, more loose than normal.

He once again stood in your doorframe, like he wasn’t sure if he was allowed in, like he didn’t feel like he had a place stepping into your bedroom. You searched his face to gauge a feeling for what he was talking about, looking for hints of mischief or anger. There was nothing, his face was completely blank, almost too blank like he was hiding something from you.

You knew you had nothing to hide — or at least nothing that he should know about. “I don’t know what you mean,” You replied, uncrossing your legs from their criss cross position and hugging them close to your chest. “Have I done something wrong?”

That answer seemed to not satisfy him, because for a moment something flickered in his eyes. “No, nothing like that,” He told you, furrowing his brows together under the mask and taking a tentative step closer into your room. “It’s just, I get this feeling when I’m around you. Like something is just gnawing at you and I can’t stop thinking about it.”

Oh, you were screwed. Alarms blared in your mind, thinking about how you had let your thoughts run too much during this trip. All the worst outcomes of this came to your mind, like how he would laugh at your growing feelings towards him, how much you wanted him almost shamelessly. It made your stomach twist into several knots, wanting to bury yourself into a hole and never ever come out of it again.

Your face must’ve told it all, because he spoke again, saying, “There. Right there. I can feel it, Y/N. Just talk to me. What is going on?” Your bottom lip quivered, knowing that there was no way you were getting out of this. This was it. The day you had been dreading and hoping didn’t come. Everything was about to come crash down onto your life.

“I can’t,” You said in a low voice, shifting your weight to sit at the edge of the bed, putting your head into your hands and staring down at the plush carpet in an attempt to get away from his stare. Almost as if you thought if you looked away long enough, he would suddenly disappear.

“What do you mean ‘you can’t’? You’re my student, you can tell me anything.”

Student. The title felt foreign in your mind now. It was something that you knew you couldn’t hold onto for much longer once the truth was out. You would be stripped of it and be a sorcerer no more. The school would hear of your feelings and immediately expel you. Student. Student. Student. The more the word bounced around in your mind the more you felt tears welling up into your eyes.

And you didn’t mean to sound so harsh when you said it, but your hands were balling up into fists as you said, “That’s what’s wrong!” Your head tilted up, seeing that Satoru had walked closer to you, towering over your frame. His face showed confusion, not understanding what you were alluding to. He didn’t even have to say it, but his expression was saying explain.

How could you even begin?

You were wordless.

“Please . .  . I just want to help you,” Gojo told you, his hand coming to grab onto your forearm. The touch felt like hot coals on your body, scorching your soul. “I don’t like seeing you like this.” Which you knew translated to I don’t like not knowing how to fix it.

“It’s you,” You confessed. “I can’t stop thinking about you.”

For a moment, Satoru thought that he had stepped into some parallel universe. Or that this was some sort of prank let on by someone else. There was no way that this was happening, you were confessing. You had been thinking about him, probably as much as he was thinking about you. It felt as if the world had turned on its axis and was spinning the opposite direction.

You, on the other hand, were waiting for the words that never came. You expected him to immediately tell you that he was going to report you to . . . oh you didn’t even know. And yet, he stood there, almost looking as dumbfounded as you did, maybe even more. This prompted you to stand up, his hand falling down and getting dangerously close to your own.

“I know …” You started again, seeing as he wasn’t going to say anything. “I know that it’s wrong, that I shouldn’t be thinking of you in the ways that I am. But I can’t stop, Satoru, you consume me.”

The usage of his name snapped him back to reality and out of his own spinning thoughts, and hearing it come from specifically your lips was not helping his frame of mind. It sounded … different coming from your mouth. Like you were saying it like a praise rather than just a passing phrase like most people did. He wanted you to say it over and over again, repeating it like a mantra you were to speak or you would die if you didn’t. His eyes flickered into your own and saw how scared you were of how he would react and how he was definitely not helping to settle your nerves.

In truth, he didn’t know how to handle this situation. After all, this was not a lesson that had been given to him and he was definitely not in the best place to tell you anything, since his emotions were starting to cloud his judgment and all he could think was how he wished to tell you he felt the same way.

You waited for his response, getting impatient and wanting to just get this over with. You were waiting for the words he was supposed to say.

But Satoru didn’t always do the things he was supposed to do, in fact, he almost never did the things that he was supposed to. So why would he think to start now?

“You and I both know that this isn’t allowed,” Satoru said. “And yet I can’t stop thinking about kissing you.”

A visible look of shock washed over your face, mouth opening slightly and eyes widening, heart pounding against your ribcage. His hand reached down and grabbed your own, fingertips softly touching the palm of your hand. This felt like a dream. Were you sure that you weren’t dreaming? No, this was definitely real. Satoru was in front of you for sure, confessing that he was feeling the exact same way.

Satoru tipped his head down to meet your own, his breath fanning along your face, making you shiver. Your breath hitched in your throat, his lips brushing against your own, almost like he was testing you. You could feel the tips of his hair tickling against your forehead, nose against nose. You were so close. The hand on your own was grasping now, pulling your body close to his. And the two of you sat there, lips millimeters close while each of your minds buzzed with the feeling of doing something so daring.

You felt yourself going mad, you couldn’t do it anymore. You couldn’t wait. All of your feelings erupted inside of your throat and suddenly you were kissing him, lips smashing against his own with no care in the world. You didn’t care about the ramifications, the school … anything. All you cared about was Gojo, wanting as much of him that he was willing to give you.

You had never really kissed anyone before. There was a moment back when you were only ten and you were with another student, seeing one of the citizens of Tokyo kissing each other on the street. Interested in what they were doing, you and your friend kissed, thinking that it was weird and dismissing it. That had been your first kiss, a rather embarrassing one, but it was nothing compared to the way Gojo kissed you. He kissed you like there was a purpose to every single move of his muscles. He kissed you like you were forbidden fruit and he was starving.

His other hand came up to the back of your neck, tangling in your hair and keeping your face close to his. For just a moment his tongue slipped into your mouth and you made a small sound, butterflies swarming in your stomach. You tried to mimic what he was doing, going with your instincts and grasping onto his bicep, feeling the taut muscles under your touch.

Everything about yours and his actions were needy and hungry, wanting each other with such need that you had pushed down for so long. All of it seemed to come out of you like crashing waves. The kissing was nice, though after a while you needed more, you were dying for more of him. Please, Satoru, you thought.

As if he could read your thoughts, he pulled away, a string of saliva the only thing connecting you two. “What do you want?” He whispered, tilting his head to the side and giving you one of those damn smirks of his. Of course he wanted you to say it. And you knew better than to not do what he wanted. 

“You, Satoru, I want you,” You whispered to him, as if someone was going to hear if you talked too loud. “Please.” You thought that you probably sounded like someone desperate, and in a way you were, you had waited for this forever and had convinced yourself that it would never happen. But he thought the exact opposite, he marveled in the way that you looked at him, wanting to show you how much you truly meant to him. The attraction and lust was there, intermingled with something more that neither of you dared to acknowledge.

He didn’t hesitate to give you what you wanted, slowly inching you towards the bed and helping you rest on your back, the silk sheets against the back of your arms and neck. Satoru was quick to follow, climbing on top of you and connecting his lips onto the skin right below your jaw. His lips were soft like snowflakes falling onto your skin, creating a masterpiece on your skin like you were his canvas. It all felt too good, the heightening the sensations to an almost unbearable amount. It sent shockwaves to your core, igniting a feeling you often only felt during the late hours of the night.

Seeing how well your body responded to him, well, almost drove Gojo crazy. You were so willing, so ready for him that his mind became cloudy, the only thing he could make out was his thoughts of you. His lips trailed down from your jaw to your neck, paying extra attention to the places that made you breathe out more than the others. He pressed a searing kiss to your pulse point, his teeth grazing the nerve and using his lips to suck a deep, purple mark into your skin. And then, when he felt it was the right time, he did it again and again, properly marking you as his. He didn’t care anymore. Your hands found their respective place in his hair, feeling the softness of the blond tufts between your fingers. It was so damn soft that you wondered how you had resisted the urge for so long before. 

Your clothes suddenly felt foreign on your body, you wanted them off, you wanted his off so that you could see all of him. He seemed to hear your thoughts, humming against your skin and pulling away, pressing a soft, firm kiss to your lips and helping you get out of them, and in turn you helped him get out of his.

Gojo’s body was like nothing you imagined. He was breathtaking. You knew that he had a nice body because of all the training and countless amounts of physical strain he has been through, but looking at those abs that he had, along with the sun kissed skin he had, you felt your throat close up, feeling inferior to what he looked like. “You’re beautiful, Y/N,” He said. “Don’t ever think that you’re not.” And you believed him.

His hands came to your hips, fingers toying with the fabric of your underwear that was the only thing blocking him from seeing you fully. His eyes scanned you, taking in the sheer and utter beauty before him. He wanted to kiss, lick, and nip on every single inch of skin on you. He wanted to learn each and every single curve, hear every story behind your scars, and know just what touches would have you squirming from underneath him. He wanted to know exactly where he had to kiss to get those sweet sounds out from you and he was sure that he could spend hours just doing that. 

No one has seen you this exposed before. You didn’t know whether or not to feel embarrassed, because he seemed to know what he was doing. You hadn’t felt the need to do anything like this with anyone else, not when you were too busy lusting over your teacher for so long. You didn’t want anyone to take that last bit of innocence from you except him, you were sure of it. And only now did you actually realize what was going to happen. Who was he to leave you pining and wanting, when you were basically offering your virginity up on a silver platter for him?

Your whole body felt hot, needing to feel the release that was beginning to build up from all of his kisses and your imagination running its course. “Satoru,” You breathed out, not knowing how to form into words what you wanted from him. Of course he knew, he could feel your hands pulling into his hair, all the while he began to whisper all the dirty little things that he wanted to do with you. How he wanted to keep you here all for himself, how he wanted to taste every single inch of you, and everything else that he could think about. After all, neither of you were hiding anything anymore. He knew exactly what he was going to do to you so that he could hear the plethora of moans that he knew you had just for him, wanting to hear his name come off of your lips in pleasure.

His head ducked down and kissed your hipbone, fingers hooking under your underwear and slowly sliding them off. Your eyes stayed on his actions, mouth forming into an ‘O’ when you realized what he was going to do. He was going to use his mouth on you. These were only things that you thought in your deepest, darkest fantasies, like he had reached into those parts of your mind and did exactly what you wanted.

As if Satoru was just tempting you, he pressed another slow kiss to the inside of your thigh and then did the same thing to the other side. Your hips lifted up only slightly, showing him that you couldn’t wait much longer. A chuckle left him, eyes reaching your own and saying, “Eager?” You weren’t even ashamed when you shook your head, keeping eye contact with him as he licked a bold stripe right up your slit. It felt as if an earthquake hit your body, your back arching and hands gripping onto his hair.

He hummed against you, liking the way that you responded to his actions. If he had it his way, he would sit here with you like this for hours on end, bringing you up to that high place again and again until you were a wrecked mess before him. It made him simply go crazy to think that he was the first person to ever do this to you, that he would be the first of anyone to hear those moans and profanities that slipped from your cherry kissed lips. Satoru’s own thoughts made him groan out, a noise that you played on repeat in your mind as your eyes screwed closed.

Your thighs quivered beside his face, attempting to squeeze shut so that you could keep him there forever. But his hands came and held them in place, fingers digging into your muscles that gave in to his touch like it was nothing. You were putty in his hands, the only movement you had was your hands pulling on his hair and the arch of your back while he lapped his tongue against you with no mercy.

“Stay still,” He told you, pulling away for a moment to lick what was left of you on his lips. You nodded, chest heaving and heart sinking at the loss of contact. But Satoru didn’t leave for long, his mouth on your clit accompanied with one of his fingers circling your entrance. You nearly lost it when he dipped his middle finger in experimentally, gauging your reaction. You could feel the coil in your stomach start to tighten, which only amplified once his finger pushed into you all the way.

You didn’t even attempt to try and censor the obscenities that came out of your mouth, mixed in rhyme with his name. Satoru. Satoru. Satoru. It was the only word that felt real in your mind.

You waited for that final jump towards a euphoric end, but it never came. Instead Satoru pulled away from you and his fingers left, making you feel uneasily empty. Opening your eyes, you saw that he was pulling down his boxers, taking his cock into his hands and watching as you almost became slack jawed - realizing what was about to happen. A moment of worry nestled its way into your mind, making your heart thump. If anyone was to find out, you would surely not be accepted back into the school. You would never be able to have Gojo again. It was your moment to choose. You knew that if you backed out, at least you would be able to work under him still and not have his affections. It would be better than never seeing him again. And yet, you couldn’t see your life without him, all of him. Not just the side that was your Sensei.

Satoru sensed your worry, taking your chin in his hands so that you looked up at him. “Are you sure?” He asked you, not wanting to move forward before you were ready. And God, were you ready. “Because once I start, I don’t think that I’m ever going to get enough of this pretty pussy.” 

And with all the courage that you mustered up, you gave him a small smile and said, “Yes.” You felt like you were flinging yourself off of some sort of cliff, or even more sinfully feeling like you were Persephone, cutting up her own slice of pomegranate and looking right into Hades eyes as she tasted the fruit, securing your fate that you would stay with him. You would stay with Satoru, even if it was only for this night.

He nestled between your legs and you could feel his tip press against your entrance. Air was caught in your lungs, sitting up on your elbows so that you could see as he eased himself into you. A sting of pain and a subtle feeling of pleasure was seated inside of you, watching as his cock was enveloped by you inch by inch. Satoru hissed at the feeling, you were so goddamn tight and he never wanted to stop from being inside of you. You looked down at where he was inside, thinking about how you could do this all day every day for the rest of your life. You now understood why this was so talked about, why your body craved it so much. Once all of him was inside, he leaned over so his head was in the crook of your neck, pressing a kiss to your searing skin as you adjusted to him bottoming out.

You urged him to continue, thinking that the discomfort would soon go away with time. And you were eager to get all of him that you could, temptation coming forward instead of reason. He pulled out all the way then eased himself back in, continuing the slower pace and watching your reaction before him, your hands reaching to his back and finding their place there. One of his hands kept your legs open, taking you by your thigh and hoisting it up.

It took all that he could muster to not just ram into you, the want starting to cloud his judgment. The cursed energy between the two of you felt as if it was pushing both you and him towards each other, the connection almost driving each of you crazy. “You feel …” He started. “You feel so good.” That alone, along with the raspiness in his voice, made a fire erupt in your stomach. You sighed in response, eyes fluttering closed once again.

And then, much to his surprise, you whispered, “Go faster, Satoru.” You needed him so bad you felt like you were going to explode, lust enveloping the both of you and intertwining with your energies.

He didn’t need to be told twice, and he gripped onto the leg he lifted up, beginning a slightly faster rhythm that had you arching your neck and back, eyes rolling to the back of your head. Satoru was so big, stretching you out in just the right way that had you almost keeling over if he hadn’t had such a tight grip on you. Your one leg wrapped along his waist, heel digging into his back while his pace increased.

This angle he had you in made you yelp and moan shamelessly, not caring if people all the way in the capital could hear you as you yelled his name like a prayer. His pace finally became a fast rhythm and you found comfort in being able to finally feel nothing but pleasure with every deep stroke he made.

In this place, it was only you and him. Like you were in your own little place of paradise where you could explore each other in every way. There was nothing that could take this moment from you or him, this moment would forever be engraved in your mind for many years to come, remembering the way that he moaned out your name and the way he looked when you opened your eyes to peek at his face. His brows were furrowed, sweat beading on his forehead and mouth spilled open saying nothing but your name.

He made you feel so good, so euphoric that the fire grew and grew, becoming a wildfire raging inside of you. And you looked so heavenly to him, the way that your eyes only looked at him, breasts bouncing with every harsh thrust he gave you. You took him so well, like you were made for only him. His hips brushed against your own, hand coming up to caress your cheek, forcing you to look him in the eyes. “I want to see you look at me when I fuck you,” he whispered, a deep sense of posessiveness suddenly washing over him. 

You weren’t going to last much longer. Not with the way that he was pounding into you with sheer force you didn’t know was possible until now. But you didn’t want this to end, you never wanted this to end in fear that things would go back to the way they were before. You would have to try and forget that this ever happened. It wasn’t something you wanted to do and didn’t even know if you had the strength to do it. After this moment both of you would be connected.

You made a guttural noise, teetering over the edge of what felt like a wave of bliss. This was it, there was no way that you could keep yourself from it now. It only took a singular deep stroke of his cock to send you right over the edge, your back arching and body spasming, his name rolling off of your tongue in the most sinful way you have ever said it before. Your hands gripped for any part of him that you could reach, groping his muscles to keep him close to you. He didn’t stop moving inside of you, making you ride it out even harder as he chased his own high. 

“Yeah? You came all over my cock like a good student, didn’t you?” 

You could only whimper in response. 

You were so sensitive as he fucked into you, giving you no mercy. He groaned as you came, watching the way that your eyes screwed shut and mouth opening in as you sucked in harsh breaths. You could feel his cock twitch inside of you and you knew that he was close, wondering if he was going to cum inside of you or pull out before he did. He did the latter, taking one more deep stroke before pulling out. Satoru was about to start stroking himself with his hand but you rushed with your own to meet him there, using your own and pumping a few times.

A string of profanities came from his lips as he came, white hot liquid spurting onto your stomach, dripping like beads coating your skin. He had no shame as he shuddered, muscles flexing with every passing second. He drank in your body, seeing how wet you were for him, how soft your hand was on his cock, how much he longed to see you like this more times before you and him left. And soon enough he was finished, the only thing between both of you was both of your panting breaths.

Satoru moved to grab something on the floor, realizing that it was the shirt he had on before and moving to wipe your stomach off, dropping it to the floor and coming to lay down next to you. You winced for a moment as you moved to look at him, his own eyes staring at the ceiling. You were scared of what was to come next, if there was anything that was supposed to come next. You knew that the two of you couldn’t be together, at least openly, though it was even risky to continue doing something like this in private.

“Satoru,” You called out to him, forcing him to look at you. “What will happen next?”

“I don’t know, Y/N, I don’t know,” He responded. All he knew was that he wanted you, again and again. In the domestic moments and in the explicit ones like before. You were so tantalizing, and he realized now that because he had tasted the forbidden fruit that was you, he would never be able to stop. There was simply no way that he would be able to conceal his want for you from you anymore.

You waited for his answer, knowing that it would probably be one you didn’t want to hear. But for the second time this evening, Satoru surprised you again.

He leaned over and kissed you.

And you knew his answer from that.

[caesium-55]

—seven days. [ ii ]

pairing: max verstappen x manager! reader.

summary: as the third time world champion, max verstappen's manager, you function on the belief that whatever max verstappen wanted, max verstappen shall get. but this time, after four years of working as his manager, you can't give him what he wants anymore and that was to stay.

author's note: not beta-read. not edited. here's part 2 folks. part 3 is on the works now. did i write this fic instead of studying for my important quiz tomorrow? yes, yes i did. pls pray for my score.

masterlist.

For Christmas in 2019, Max has gotten you an apartment near his in Monaco. It is a loft apartment good for one on the 8th floor, a building away from where Daniel and Max lived. Originally, he wants to get you the unit a floor below his. You decline quickly, insisting that you are very fine with rooming with Julia and Kendall, who are both members of the Red Bull PR team whom you have gotten close with since your first year working with Red Bull. Max may have beef with the PR team for making him do a lot of embarrassing shit for the views but you're besties with most of them and actually thank them for making Max suffer through PR stuff because you cannot afford therapy and watching Max suffer through PR-related activities is a good form of free therapy. Also, Monaco apartments are fucking expensive. Red Bull might be paying you well but not well enough to afford an apartment in a country as expensive as Monaco.

“I want you close,” he tells you. If you did not know any better, you'd have butterflies fluttering in your intestines right about that moment. Sometimes, Max utter the most heart-fluttering of nonsense without meaning to. It causes your heart to stutter more times than you would like to admit.

“Well, I don't want you close.”

Max will never ever win an argument with you. He knows that. You know that. The best he can do is come to a compromise, a compromise that is usually tailored to suit whatever you want.

So you got that small loft apartment a building away, good for one person only. It's easy to clean and it's cheap, Max already said that, which makes you happy because you can set a payment plan for that. An apartment as a Christmas gift is already too much, borderline giving you a heart attack already. Rich people spending their money give you, a person of the middle class folks, heart attacks. Why can't Max be normal and give you a normal gift? A bracelet? A bag? You’ll even accept it if he gave you a slice of cheesecake. Not even your parents can buy you an apartment.

It has only been three years since the keys are passed on to your ownership and people say three years is enough time for a person to make a place home. But your apartment doesn't even feel like home, only a place you’ll sleep in if you happen to be in Monaco for the evening.

Home is that humble, two-storey house painted in red and yellow in Lynnwood Avenue, Vista Del Pueblo, Austin, a total picture of a picket fence dream. Home is Abuelo's old farmhouse in El Paso where you spent your childhood riding horses and driving ATVs across the dusty dry earth. Home is the retro milkshake place owned by the sweet old couple that has been in the neighborhood longer than your entire existence. Home is the tree-lined streets where you walked the family senior dog, Niko. Home is the Austin Fire House, your Dad’s workplace that you visited a handful of times back when you were a child to deliver cookies that your Abuela baked so your Dad could share it with his co-workers. Home is your mom’s clinic in the middle of downtown, always smelling like eugenol, disinfectant, formaldehyde, and her perfume. Home is not glitz and gold and glamor and cash cash cash. Home is not seeing wealthy people left and right. Home is not Monaco.

And it is not like you stayed long in your place either. You're always off traveling around the world with the Red Bull team and accompanying Max wherever he needs your presence. You don't even spend your breaks in that apartment because you immediately fly home to your family once a break is graciously given to you before flying off again to watch Max collect trophy after trophy.

Six days from now, you're going to be flying off to Texas. That means you have six days—less than six days actually—to pack all your crayons and go. Of course you're going to pack up the day before you leave. Doing shit last minute makes your life exciting, and it's not like you had a lot of shit to pack anyway. All your belongings can be tucked into a total of three suitcases. Three years worth of belongings in three suitcases.

you: you doin good there?

Max has been holing himself up in his penthouse since your arrival from Abu Dhabi, probably dealing with his breakup with Kelly. A shame, really. You thought the two looked good together. (Do they really? the asshole part of your brain thinks.)

And P. Thank God for that child’s existence. You hate children but P is an exception. P brings the best out of Max. Max has gotten the chance to act as the father he never had. It's heartwarming, to be honest.

him: not really no

him: can you bring me coffee

you: on it champ

Fifteen minutes later, you’re knocking on the gigantic double doors of his penthouse, a tall styro cup of espresso from that cute café two streets down and a slice of blueberry cheesecake because you’re thoughtful enough to buy him his favorite cake. You experienced a breakup before. A cake and an icecream work wonders when it came to healing broken hearts.

“You're fast,” he immediately says after opening the door. You kind of expect that he’d look worse, snotty and messy and looking like he ran from hell and back. But no, he looks……fine? His sweater and shorts look absolutely neat and comfortable and dry of snot. His hair is a little fluffy from lying on his bed but not too messy. He doesn't even look like he was crying. No red-rimmed eyes. No red nose.

You fake gasp, putting a hand on your chest for additional dramatic effect, “The fastest racer in F1 callin’ me fast. Truly honored.”

A smile plays on his lips, sidestepping and beckoning you in.

You frequently come by Max’s home, for work purposes of course, but you still cannot help but be amazed by the enormity of it every time you enter. Max’s penthouse is twenty times bigger than the apartment you currently live in. One man and a big house—it must be very lonely now that P and Kelly are no longer around. Now, you’re even more worried about what will happen the moment you go back to Texas.

Oh… You still haven't told him yet.

“Coffee,” you hand him the warm styro cup to which he accepts gratefully. He utters his thanks, taking a whiff before sipping, letting out a pleasured moan.

You make your way to his gigantic kitchen, navigating your way through his cabinets in search of a plate and a fork. You slide the cheesecake on the plate towards Max, who followed you to the kitchen and sat on the empty stool in the kitchen counter.

“Thank you,” he says, picking up the fork and taking a bite. He glances at your feet, eyes trained on your YSL. The obnoxious sound of the heels clicking against the floor as you walk probably is the one that caught his attention.

“You know, you've been wearing the same shoes since 2019.”

Points for Max for noticing. These YSL Opyum heels are the first luxury items you bought for yourself after saving for three years to buy one pair. You saw a rich international student wear it once back in university and you liked how sophisticated it looked compared to all the pairs of converse or platform boots you owned. So you made it your life’s goal to own one. In 2019, after doing tons of part time jobs in university and working with Red Bull for a whole year, you managed to buy yourself one on your birthday and you’d been wearing them to work ever since.

Your regular work uniform consists of a Red Bull polo shirt, a pencil or a slit skirt, and that specific pair of heels. Around 2021, you bought another pair to replace the old one because the old one broke. And 2022 again.

“What's wrong with ‘em?” you ask, brows furrowing as you followed his train of sight. Your heels might be a year old already but they still look fine.

Max blinks, “No, there's nothing wrong. Just…Do you think you would want to wear some other design?”

“No,” is your reply. “I like ‘em just the way they are.”

“Okay.”

Your conversation drifts into something else as Max finishes his coffee and cake. You spend the rest of the day in Max’s penthouse, lying on his plush couch while a slasher movie from the 2000s played on his wide TV. He has given you access on his Netflix account so you abused it to your heart’s content because you don't even have. a Netflix subscription. You can absolutely afford one, you just choose not to. You have opted in using your phone mid-movie because the movie is beginning to get real scary but you do not want Max to think you're a coward so you acted like you're disinterested instead.

“Oh look, Charles is also back in Monaco. Do you want to hang out together?” you nudge Max with your foot, who swats it away from him, face contorting in disgust. You show him the post on Charles private IG—yes, you were mutuals in each other's private IG because whoever is friends with Max was friends with you by extension—on your phone.

“Stop makin’ that face, my feet are nice.”

Your toenails are a glorious red now. Ferrari red actually and they suit you better than the Red Bull red. Huh, maybe you should have considered applying for Ferrari instead of Renault in 2018.

“No, it isn't.”

You roll your eyes, pulling it away from him and sitting up, “Do you want me to schedule you a dinner with Charles? You might need the bro time, you know? Dad said bro times are also important, but not as important as family time, of course. My bro broke up with his sweetheart back when I was still in uni and his best buds were the reason he was back up in tippy top shape by the end of the week.”

Max stares at you blankly, “I think I understand the words individually but not the sentence entirely. I don't know if it's the accent or you Americans just have a strange way of structuring your sentences.”

“Point is, hang out with a friend because a friend can help you move on from a pussy.”

Max hurls a throw pillow at your direction, which you luckily avoided thanks to your non-racer level but still considerably good reaction time, but unfortunately, this action causes your center of gravity to shift and before you know it, you're falling from the couch. Unconsciously, you grab Max but then Max doesn't expect that you’ll grab him so now, you’re both falling off the couch and onto the floor.

You groan.

“Fuckin’ ass, man. That was uncalled for.”

He flips you off.

Nevertheless, Max ends up following your advice though and calls Charles to hang out the next day. Lestappen fans should be thanking you on Twitter the next day for bringing those two together on an off-day in Monaco. Maybe they'll hang out and eat together in a restaurant? Maybe they'll go on a yacht picnic?

Except Max sends you a message at high noon.

him: sos

you: is your kitchen burning

him: no

him: but this is still an emergency and you need to come quick

him: he’s with his girlfriend and i don’t want to thirdwheel

you: succ it up

him: you can’t do this to me

him: i just got my heart broken in abu dhabi

you: where are you

him: home

him: i also need help in cooking

Charles is the one who answers the door when you knock. He looks genuinely surprised when he sees you and you deduce that Max hasn't told him that you're coming over.

“Babe, who’s that?” you hear Alex’s voice behind Charles and you light up immediately, quickly moving past Charles to throw your hands around the sweet young woman.

“Alex!” Alexandra laughs and hugs you back. The sound of her laughter is as pretty as she and God definitely has favorites because why did he sculpt this twenty-one year old like the daughter of the Aphrodite while you look like you were born from one of Hephaestus’ sperm that lost the gene pool contest? The world is unfair. You always get the short end of the stick, may it be career-wise or appearance-wise, and you can't even bring your personality to the table because normally, without the whole act of professionalism and sophistication you put on, you act like an extroverted American frat boy on a good day and a sassy drag queen slash war freak on a bad day so yeah, you guess that's the short end of the stick, too.

“Seriously?” you look up and saw Max holding a frying pan, staring at you unimpressed. You roll your eyes and slowly pull away from the hug, gaze returning to Alexandra.

“How’ve you been, sweetie? Been a while since I last saw you.”

You didn't get a chance to talk to her in Abu Dhabi and in Las Vegas.

“Good,” she replies, smiling sweetly and ugh, you want to pinch her cheeks so bad. But Charles is pulling you away from Alexandra before you can do so.

“No, no, she is mine, yours is right over there,” Charles says, pointing at Max, who's still standing there in the corner. “Go on. Shoo.”

You roll your eyes before walking up to Max, “‘Sup?”

Max raises a brow at you, “So Charles’ girlfriend gets a hug and I get a sup?”

“Well, she's Alexandra Saint Mleux and you’re just….” you look him up and down. “Nevermind, what you trynna cook?”

“I haven’t decided yet.”

“I thought you said you were cooking.”

“I said I needed help with cooking.”

Your eyes narrow into slits, “You’re going to let me do the cooking, aren't you?”

“You know that pasta you made in September that you said was your mother’s recipe?”

A sigh escapes your lips as you roll the sleeves of your button-up to your elbows and power-walked your way to the kitchen, the sound of your YSL heels clicking against the floor bouncing against the walls of Max’s kitchen.

Lunch goes great. Charles and Alexandra love your cooking. Max has even asked for seconds. Good to know that he's eating well. Somewhere down the line, champagne is served even though it’s mid-afternoon and the four of you're sitting in Max’s balcony, staring at Monaco scape below. Thankfully, it is a cloudy day in Monaco. The heat of the sun isn't too harsh on the skin. Despite that, you hand Max a sun screen.

“Sorry about Kelly, by the way,” Alexandra says. Your conversation has drifted towards Max’s failed relationship now.

“That is very nice of you to say,” replies Max, smiling slightly. “But I’m okay.”

You give him a look, clearly unconvinced. Admitting vulnerability gives him hives so he's definitely lying.

“You look too okay for a guy who ended a three-year relationship,” Charles muses and his words get you immediately thinking.

Oh? So they’ve been dating that long? You never noticed.

“Even [Name] looked worse when she broke up with that Williams mechanic two years ago and they dated for like what? Barely a year?”

“Unprovoked!” you exclaim. Alex and Max laugh.

But yeah, Charles is right. When you broke up with Leo in 2021, it was not the prettiest sight. He entered Williams mid-2020 as a mechanic and he immediately caught your attention. He's kind and handsome and a very sweet guy. You have similar interests—engineering—and a similar sense of humor and you just….work so well together, you know? You were sure he was your soulmate the moment he cracked up that Physics pickup line and you know it was the same with him. You swore to God that you’d run away from all the British charming assholes but Leo made you eat your own words and gave you a run for your money.

But alas, 2021 season came and Red Bull Racing became busier than ever because Max and Hamilton got crazily competitive and Max demanded your full attention, needing you as a support system to win.

And Leo. Well, he’s busy, too. Engineers are always busy. But he felt neglected because all your attention was on Max. He felt like he was competing with Max for your attention and it shouldn't even be a competition in the first because Leo was the boyfriend and Max was not. And you cannot even deny that you prioritized Max that year. You wanted Max to win. You needed Max to win, so he can finally ask Horner to move you to the engineering team.

Losing Leo is devastating but Max won the WDC title that year and while you spent nearly a month crying over Leo after the breakup, you're hoping that at least, in 2022, you’ll finally get that damned engineering position at the cost of losing your soulmate. That the tears you shed and the broken heart you carried inside your ribs will be worth it if it was in exchange for your dream. Then, it does not happen. The job isn't given to you and you spent the early months of the 2023 season wishing that you have chosen Leo instead of Max Verstappen.

“You’re still friends with him, right?” Charles turns to you.

“Of course,” you say honestly. You're still mutuals on IG and he still hearts your IG stories at times. You still talk, too, on the freer nights where there's a lot of time to waste. “We ended on good terms.”

“How about you, Max?”

“Can we not talk about this please?”

The four of you empty that bottle of champagne and once the sun has begun retiring for the night, Alex and Charles also left. You're soon to follow, fixing your tote bag and going through the mental checklist in your head so you will not forget anything and not waste energy returning here to pick it up.

“You can stay for dinner.”

Max’s offer surprises you.

“No.”

His face drops as quickly as your answer came.

“You're goin’ to let me cook again.”

“No, I’ll cook.”

You give him an unimpressed look. Clearly, you're not convinced.

“I swear, I’ll cook.”

“What if I get poisoned?”

“You won't get poisoned.”

When you continue staring at him, he sighs.

“Just stay please?”

Of course, you stayed. He asked after all.

You keep your eyes on him as he makes dinner with clumsy hands and a bit of unsureness behind his actions.

“You're goin’ to burn it, honey,” you point out.

“What honey? I didn't put any honey in it.”

You blink. He blinks back.

���You’re gonna give me aneurysm one day.”

Shaking your head, you walk into the bathroom at the end of the enormous hallway, lock the door behind you, lean your back against the door, and slowly slides down until your ass meets the cold bathroom floor. You slap a palm against your forehead and purse your lips to stop a scream from erupting.

God fucking dammit, Max is too adorable back there and this is not doing good things for your heart.

[binniesbooks]

halloo, I come with a request 🧎‍♀️‍➡️🧎‍♀️‍➡️ ofc feel free to ignore it if you don't feel like writing about it or js don't like the request, that's totally OK!!

but I have been thinking about idol!soobin x fan!reader (feeding my delusions HAHAH) maybe the reader started out as a fan but at a meet and greet or something, she caught soobin's eye and then yada yada they get together !!

then, one day, y/n is on her phone and comes across an edit of soobin. ofc edits of him weren't anything new to her considering she was a fan before she got w soobin but this one caught her eye bcs it wasn't about soobin specifically but about his hands 👀👀 she saw it in a whole different light but ofc was too shy to tell soobin herself so she keeps it a secret

but then another day, in their shared apartment, reader is watching yet another edit of soobin's hands but what she doesn't know is that soobin came back earlier than usual and was right behind her, seeing the edit. that's when it clicked, why y/n was more nervous than usual these past few days, staring at his hands. and then well smut😌😌😌 (kinda mean dom soobin plsss)

feel free to alter it as u like or not do it at all HAHAHA just needed to get my thoughts out!! love yaa

-🤍

• CHOKING HAZARD

SB 000 .F23 2024

wc 4.1k

pairings meandomidolbf!Soobin x subfem!reader

warnings size kink, choking, fingering, slight oral (fem receiving) unsafe sex, pet names, cum eating, creampie, slight degradation (plus if I missed anything)

faye's note TOTALLY DOWN BAD FOR SOOBIN'S HANDS THAT I WOULD GLADLY SIGN A PETITION TO START A FANDOM FOR HIS PRETTY HANDS??? GAAHHH! Anyway, although I felt like it took me decades to finish this fic, I enjoyed writing this one. Hmhmhm. 🙂‍↕️

"Girl, I swear! He was staring at you the whole time!" Your friend exclaimed on your way home after attending a fan meet event with your favorite K-pop boy band, TXT.

"Stop with your delusions, Rain," you chuckled. "Why would my bias stare at me? That's impossible," you said, scoffing at the idea your friend had been conducting on your way home.

"Oh my god, you're such a dumb Soobrangdan, I swear! You're losing your chance!" Your friend was about to burst out, lucky for you, there are only a few locals riding the bus, and they're not paying attention to your friend making a fuss.

You glanced at the photo card dangling on your bag, your bias really looks handsome. You like the other four guys, but you’re committed to Soobin. The tall guy gave the cute yet sexy and hot aura. His bunny smile and pretty face made you fall for him over and over again. --- You we’re a total simp for Soobin.

"Here! Look! MOAs are uploading pictures and videos here and there. Take a look and tell me if I'm wrong!" Rain frowns. You took her phone and scrolled through the platform.

'She's so lucky! Soobin has been staring at her the whole time!'

'She's a Soobrangdan, right? How lucky!'

'Oh, to be stared at by your bias!'

'Prayer reveal, sis!'

It was true. Soobin was looking at you the whole damn time. He looks at the crowd for a second, quickly returning his gaze at you. Oh my god! What in the world have you done to be looked at like this by your bias?!

"Oh fuck, I hope Taehyun would look at me like how Soobin stared at you last time!" It's been a couple of months since the last fan meeting you attended. And this time, you are attending another fan signing event again.

You weren't expecting anything at all, or so you thought. Maybe, deep inside, you're expecting Soobin to recognize you from the crowd. For him to look at you the same way he did last time.

"You're the one who gave me the crocheted KARA lightstick last time, how could I forget you?" Soobin's bunny smile flashed right in front of your face. His big hand is almost covering your tiny ones.

You were giggling the whole time. His hand envelopes yours. He even held your wrist in an almost teasing manner as he compared your size difference. Soobin couldn't stop smiling either. He adores how your hand fits perfectly on his. How the size of your ring finger is the same size as his pinky finger.

And just before you move on to the next member, he sneakily wrote something on the album he was signing.

"I really recognize you, y/n. I hope we can see each other more often," he whispered. "And... don't let anybody touch this album aside from you, yeah?" He smirks as he slides the signed album towards you.

You went home in a dazed state. Your friend couldn't even talk to you properly, frustrated she just shut up. You weren't saying anything aside from the constant "huh?" and "mhm!", while you were clutching the album against your chest tightly.

After doing your nightly routine, you jumped on your bed. The white and orange-colored album caught your eye as you quickly got up and grabbed it.

Sniffing the album, you slowly turned every page. Admiring every beautiful face on each page. Until you saw his picture near the middle part—it was Soobin's picture.

'Hi pretty, call me if you're free.' was written on the edge of the page along with a phone number. Your jaw dropped to the floor, confused and baffled.

You were expecting something more like a sweet message or such, not a 'call me' note.

Yet you found yourself dialing the number written on the page of the album.

"H-hello?" You muttered when you heard a deep breath on the other end. "I-is this Soobin? Choi Soobin?" You were practically biting your nails while muttering the words carefully. What if it's just a bluff?

"Y/n?" the voice answered. Alas! It was Soobin!

"H-hi! I... I'm... I just--"

"Calm down, sweetie," Soobin chuckled.

You took a deep breath and whispered a soft hi. Soobin hums as an answer. The call was short, because Soobin was busy with his schedule. Well, that one-time call already meant a lot to you, who are you to complain?

A couple of months later, TXT organized another fan signing event for their comeback stage. This time, it was a lot bigger than the other. This time, thousands of people are expected to participate. And once again, you and your friends were lucky to acquire the VIP ticket.

It was a crisp autumn evening, and the anticipation in the air was electric. Fans from all corners of the city had gathered for the long-awaited fan meeting of TXT, their favorite boy band. Among the thousands in attendance, you found yourself at the front of the stage, heart racing as the boys took their places.

As the event kicked off, Soobin scanned the crowd, his gaze dancing over faces filled with excitement until it landed on you. You felt your cheeks flush, unsure if it was the light or the warmth of his gaze that sent butterflies fluttering in your stomach. For a moment, time seemed to stand still as his eyes locked onto yours, a playful smirk breaking across his face. You quickly looked down, too shy to hold his gaze any longer, but not before you noticed the playful glint in his eyes.

“Who’s ready to have some fun?” Soobin called out, his voice laced with enthusiasm. The crowd erupted in cheers, but all you could think about was that moment of connection. As the various activities unfolded—games, Q&As, and performances—you couldn’t shake the feeling that Soobin’s eyes kept drifting back toward you.

During a particularly lively segment, he started to walk toward the edge of the stage, playfully teasing the fans. You held your breath, half-expecting him to call someone else into the spotlight. Then, without warning, he pointed directly at you. “You! Come here!”

Your heart stopped. “Me?” You stammered, disbelief evident on your face as you made your way to the front. The crowd parted with laughter and cheers, urging you on. With each step, the adrenaline surged, and by the time you stood before him, your heart was pounding furiously.

“Hi! What’s your name?” Though his eyes were actually screaming, he knew your name, leaning closer, his warm smile making it hard to concentrate.

“Uhm, it's y/n," you managed, your voice barely audible above the loud cheers around you.

“Well, aren’t you brave?” He said with a playful wink. “I have a feeling you’re going to be my favorite fan tonight.

”You couldn’t believe it—he was flirting with you right there in front of everyone! The other members laughed and encouraged him, but he didn’t take his eyes off you. As the event progressed, he kept making lighthearted jokes, steering the attention back to you each time.

When the event ended, he stepped down from the stage and walked toward you. “You know,” he said, his voice low enough for only you to hear, “I think we should hang out sometime. I’d like to get to know you better."

Your breath caught in your throat as the other members around you gasped. Was he really asking you out? “Are you serious?” You asked, trying to mask the disbelief with a teasing smile.

"Absolutely,” he smiled back, mischief dancing in his eyes. “What do you say? Just us, away from the cameras and crowds?”

After exchanging contact information with a heart full of hope, your night wrapped up, but that was only the beginning. Over the next few weeks, Soobin kept his promise. Text messages turned into phone calls, and soon enough, the two of you were meeting in secret cafés, parks, and even sharing ice cream on chilly evenings. Each moment together deepened the bond you were forming.

Dating someone like Soobin wasn’t without its challenges; the scrutiny of being in the public eye weighed heavily on both of you. But amidst the noise, you found solace in the quiet moments—the way he would listen intently as you spoke, the laughter you shared over inside jokes, and the warmth of his hand finding yours.

One night, while walking beneath a canopy of stars, Soobin gently squeezed your hand and said, “I never expected to find someone so genuine in this crazy world. I’m really glad you caught my eye that day.”

With your heart racing, you looked up at him, his face lit with anticipation. “I'd never imagined myself dating you, Soob, I even thought you're joking. But... You’ve changed my life in ways I never could have imagined. You made me love life even more,” you sighed.

In that moment, the world faded away, leaving just the two of you standing under the sparkling sky, two hearts dancing to a rhythm that felt undeniably right.

"Were you watching edits of me again?" You were startled from where you were sitting when Soobin spoke.

"Oh my god, Bin! At least announce that you're home, else I’ll end up dying young," you joked, your hand still on your chest.

Soobin chuckled, planting a kiss on your forehead, "I did, sweetie. Maybe you're just too focused on what you were watching that you didn't even hear me. What if it's not me? What if it's a killer or a thief?" Soobin pouts as he melts into your arms.

"What the hell are you saying? Do they have the house key?" Your eyebrows raised into a frown and Soobin pouted.

It's been only 3 months since you started officially dating him, yet you knew almost everything about him. You're too familiar with when he's stressed out, or when he's angry, or when he just wants to be clingy.

One typical Saturday afternoon, while the sun was casting a warm golden hue across the room, you sat on your bed, scrolling through social media.

You found yourself watching a short video clip that featured your boyfriend in a relaxed interview setting. He was gesturing with his hands, those long, slender fingers of his gliding through the air as he spoke animatedly about his passion for music. You couldn’t help but feel a flutter in your chest as you admired his natural charisma. You had always found him attractive, but something about his fingers today set your imagination racing.

The way he drummed his fingers on the table, or how he would push his hair back while speaking, was captivating. You leaned in closer, your face flush with warmth, almost forgetting the world around you. The clip had sparked a whirlwind of fantasies in your mind, and you lost yourself in thoughts of how his fingers might feel on your skin, exploring and teasing.

Just as you were about to replay the video for the third time, you heard a soft click at your door. Your heart raced as you quickly looked away from your phone, feeling like a deer caught in headlights.

To your surprise, it was Soobin himself, looking casual yet undeniably cute in his oversized hoodie. “Hey, i'm home,” he said, a playful smile spreading across his face. You froze, phone still in hand, the video still playing in the background as your cheeks flushed a deep shade of red.

“What were you watching?” he asked. You felt your throat go dry, words barely finding their way out. “Um, just a… a video,” you stammered, avoiding his gaze.

He stepped closer, his curiosity piqued. “Oh really? Is it something interesting?”

For a second, you thought of showing it to him, telling him about it, yet you shut it off and brushed it all aside.

"W-what do you want for dinner?" You muttered, shoving your phone in your pocket.

"Don't cook tonight, I booked a restaurant." Soobin smiled, shrugging off the matter that was the video on your phone.

You took a quick shower, picked some nice casual clothes, and took his hand in yours, walking hand in hand once again.

Soobin makes a joke about you might be cheating on him and that you're hiding something from him. But of course, you showed proof you didn't do anything of the sort.

Dinner went well. Aside from some pair of eyes probably boring holes in your skull, Soobin made you comfortable nonetheless. You had a good time with him again, after a while of being busy with his hectic schedule.

The next day, Soobin went out earlier than usual. They were called in for a sudden meeting for their upcoming shoot.

You were enjoying your time alone. Baking some goods for him to taste when he gets home. Cleaning and rearranging the house stuff for a cleaner and cozy space. You even changed the curtains, the sheets, the pillowcases, and the blankets.

After a whole day of cleaning, you sat down on your usual spot on the sofa, turning on your phone to consume some entertainment. You found yourself searching for the clip you had watched yesterday.

And once again, it made your head spin. His long and slender fingers look so pretty. His huge hand made you think about something unholy. Your fingers slowly digging into the soft pillow, your thighs rubbing against each other.

His eyebrows shot up in genuine surprise, a soft laugh escaping his lips. “My fingers? What about them?”

You jolt up from where you were sitting, quickly shutting off your phone and shoving it face down on the couch.

"H-hey! Y-you're phone--- I mean home!" you exclaimed, quickly hitting your head and cursing yourself for messing your words up.

You felt your face grow even warmer, heart racing. The heat of embarrassment surged through you, but there was something unmistakably thrilling about his interest. Soobin tilts his head to the side, curious of what that was all about.

"They’re just… really nice,” you finally admitted, barely above a whisper, a mix of shyness and audacity washing over you.

Soobin’s smile widened, and a glimmer of something playful sparked in his deep-set eyes. “Nice, huh? I guess there are worse things to be complimented on.” He took a step closer, invading your personal space, making you acutely aware of how your body responded to his proximity.

You could feel the coldness of the concrete wall seeping through your thin shirt and kissing your warm back.

Suddenly, the air was thick with tension, a magnetic pull drawing you toward him. He leaned down slightly, tilting his head, his gaze locked onto yours. “You know, I can show you just how nice they are…” His voice dropped to a whisper, the teasing lilt sending shivers down your spine.

Without thinking, you leaned forward, and the space between you collapsed. The spark ignited, and Soobin captured your lips in a soft, tentative kiss. It was electrifying, leaving you breathless and wanting more.

As he pulled back, you gasped at the intensity of the moment, still dazed.

"Are you okay?” he asked, a mix of concern and mischief playing on his features. You nodded, your heart racing. “I think so… I just never imagined…”

“Neither did I,” he interrupted, his fingers brushing against your cheek, a subtle caress that felt intimate and exhilarating. “But sometimes, the unexpected can lead to something amazing.”

Before you could process it, Soobin pulled you closer, his lips finding yours again, this time more passionately. Your hands instinctively found their way to his hair, fingers tangling in the soft strands as you melted into him. You could feel his warmth radiating off him, igniting an undeniable fire within you.

As the kiss deepened, his fingers moved down your arms, tracing patterns that sent jolts of electricity through your body. You pulled back for a moment, eyes searching his. “Are you sure about this?”

His playful grin returned, and he nodded. “If you're down, I'm down. Who am I to decline? Besides, I think you need me," he chuckled as he gripped your waist.

With a rush of adrenaline, you surrendered to the moment, letting go of your shyness and embracing the connection between you. It was as if nothing else mattered; the world outside faded away, leaving just the two of you in this shared sanctuary of desire.

The afternoon melted into an evening of exploration and passion, every soft touch and lingering kiss drawing you closer. Soobin’s fingers, the very ones that had ignited this whole encounter, explored your skin like an artist painting a masterpiece, each stroke igniting flames of longing in their wake.

"S-soobin," you choked out.

"Yes love? I'm here. I'm still here," he muttered, kissing your neck. He then pulled away and grabbed your arm, sniffing your wrist. "You smell sweet and amazing, did you take a bath already?" he asked. You simply nodded, pulling your hand away and wrapping them around his waist.

"Bedroom? I think I really need you right now," you bit your lower lip as you look up at him.

"You do?" Soobin taunts, lifting one of his hands, gently rubbing your lip. He pulled your lower lip down with his thumb. "I don't know what I could do to you. Your tiny body looks so frail and fragile compared to me."

"Please, need you..." Your eyes pleading to the tall man, rubbing your thighs together, wanting to finally feel him.

Soobin carefully wrapped his hand around your neck, slowly tightening his grip. You heard him curse under his breath when you gasped for air, clutching on his shirt. His grip easily made you lightheaded and your mind hazy. You're totally making him develop his size kink in a sexual way.

"B-bin... S-soobin..." You managed to squeak out as fat tears fell from your waterline. He pulled his hand away, and he watched you catch your breath, whimpering on his chest as you hugged him tight. Not wanting to let him know how turned on you are.

"Did I hurt you? I'm sorry, you just look... You looked so pretty when you're all drooling and crying with just my hand wrapped around your neck," he said as he hugged you back, his voice tinged with apology.

"F-felt good... Want more..." You admitted, burying your face in his chest. Soobin carried you all the way to your shared bedroom. Laying you down on the bed, carefully stripping you out of your thin clothes, and hovering above you.

"Y/n, if we don't stop now, I can't guarantee you I would be able to stop later on," he sighed, fingers gently brushing your plush thighs.

"Need you. Need you so much, please..." You begged, grabbing his toned arm. Soobin dipped his head down, kissing the tip of your nose.

"I love you, don't think that I only want your body. I love you because you are you, y/n." You weren't expecting him to spew assurance in the midst of this, especially since he was suddenly talking about your body, but it made you feel at ease for some reason.

He then grabs your hands, restraining them both with just a single hand above your head. "My hands and fingers are pretty, you say? Watch them for me, yeah?" he said as he slowly rubbed your clit.

"Mmphh!" You squirmed under him, a faint blush creeping onto your cheeks.

His digits slowly disappeared in your hole as he fucked you with his fingers. Grinning widely while watching your small frame thrash beneath him.

"Say it again," he commands, "That my fingers are pretty."

"B-bin mmphh! Your fingers are--- ahh! Are p-pretty!"

"How pretty are they?" he edged, curling his long fingers inside.

"Ohh! S-so pretty w-wanna c-cum--fuck ahh! W-wanna cum on them!" You managed.

"Mhm, go ahead, do it."

With a few more pumps, you came undone on his fingers, body twitching from sensitivity. His face lit up, looking proud that he managed to make you come on his fingers. When he pulled out his fingers, they were glistening with your arousal. Sticky. Wet. Creamy.

Yet your eyes were fixed on his essence-covered fingers. It didn't escape his sight, smirking as one nasty idea came to his mind.

He shoved his fingers in your mouth, letting you taste yourself. Allowing you to suck on his pretty fingers covered with your slick. Making you play with his fingers with your warm and hot tongue.

"Damn, you look so sexy like this. If only I knew about this, we should've done this earlier," he chuckled as he swirled his fingers on your tongue.

"Do you taste good? I bet you do." He smiled before pulling his hand away from you and dipping his head on the lower region of your body. Gripping your thighs to keep them open, licking a long stripe on your dripping pussy.

Your body arched as a guttural moan escaped from your mouth. "Damn, you do taste good, should've done this to you before."

If he has long fingers, no doubt that he has a long tongue too. That he could even tongue-fuck you and would possibly make you cum again if only he stayed longer.

Soobin pulled out a pack of condoms that had been sitting in his wallet for a long time now. "What if we hit it raw instead?" His voice was joking, yet you agreed.

Soobin was packing. Girthy --- Veiny. Thick. Long.

"B-bin too b-big!" You whined. He made you straddle him, claiming he'd reach deeper inside you in this position. Not to mention the pack of condoms discarded and long forgotten on the floor.

"Baby, you can take me. I know you can. You’re doing so good. Doing so fucking good, my pretty girl." His fingers traced the prominent bulge on your tummy. "See? I'm deep inside you. In here. Look. You're such a good girl," he coos, poking and pushing at the bulge.

His lips captured yours once again. Kissing you fervently yet carefully. "You're so tiny," he giggled as he leaned back, pulling your lower lip again with his thumb. He wasn't expecting you suck his finger into your mouth.

"Dirty," he remarks, and he felt you clench around his cock.

"Fuck, you want that? You want to be called dirty? To be called a slut?” He felt you clench around his cock again.

"Angel, didn't know you're this kinky?" he chuckled. "Aside from being choked, you quite love getting degraded, hm?"

"B-bin, 's too m-much?" You whined, wanting to hide on his neck, but he insists on watching your face contort as he rearranges your guts.

"Poor baby," he coos, red cock ramming your overstimulated cunt even harder. Your wanton moans got louder and high pitched. His thrusts got sloppy and erratic.

"Fuck, won't last long, mmphh!" His head thrown back as he grips your waist, pushing your body down on his cock, slamming through your cervix.

"M-me neither, please, n-need more," you whimpered.

One of his hands flew up to your neck, restraining your lungs to acquire enough oxygen, making your mind a little hazy and your pulse throb for a bit while he shoots his cum inside you.

"Shit!" he hisses, convulsing, as he leans his forehead on your shoulder, loosening his grip on your neck. The corner of his lips curled up when he heard you panting, gasping for air, your body twitching above him as you came undone for the second time. Your boyfriend developed many kinks, after all.

He slowly pulled away, a glob of cum flowing out from your spent hole. "Let's get you cleaned up," he whispers, along with the soft kisses being planted on your temple. You shook your head and pulled the blanket over your bodies instead, hugging him tight, neglecting the sticky feeling.

Soobin then decided to rest and clean up later. He doesn't want you to be sulky and mad anyway, so he just hugged you closer to him, gently massaging your sore body.

Smiling to himself with his eyes closed after realizing something. That when he chokes you, he now knows you love it. When he shoves his fingers on your mouth, he now knows you're reeling at the feeling. When he restrains both of your wrists with just a single hand, given how huge his hand is. He might be your big, clingy baby at times, but he's a total daddy in bed. He likes to show power and dominance towards you—his pretty little angel.

@binniesbooks 2024

[pretzel-box]

Hi Chea!!! First of all, I read some of ur fics, and I absolutely loved it. You did such a great job :D

Second, I wanna make a fic request because why not lol. It's my first time doing this, so I'm a lil nervous ishdudjudos

Can I pls get a fic where reader gets ill (like probably a cold or whatever) because of them constantly entering bodies of water and by the time they reach Sebastian, they're wet and miserable as hell so Sebastian just decides to keep them in his shop to rest and recover lmao

(Sorry if this ask is a mouth full aishdidhhd)

Tags: GN!Reader, Can be read as Established Relationship, Reader has a cold probably, comfort, slight fluff.

Words: 1,1k

Authors Note: Sorry for the wait! ÓwÒ It took me a while to gather my creative brain cells. I actually edited this story twice, so if there are any weird words or logic mistakes then I overlooked something!

It had started as a small, nagging tickle in your throat—a little cough here, a sniffle there. Nothing serious, you told yourself. But days passed, and that tickle had grown into something worse. Yet, despite it, you kept going, pushing through the feverish haze that had begun to creep in. After all, the job wasn’t going to finish itself. Each day, you found yourself wading through rooms, water, and debris, trudging through wet halls to retrieve all assets and the crystal that were needed, drenched to the bone in cold, murky water.

You told yourself that once you were done, you’d rest. But for now, you have to keep moving. And so you did. Rest means death and death isn't something you aimed at for now. So it either meant pushing through or giving up.

By the time you reached Sebastian’s shop, the combination of the relentless water and your refusal to take care of yourself had finally caught up with you. The cold had settled deep into your bones, and your wet diving suit clung to your skin, sticking uncomfortably as you stumbled inside his little store. The warmth of the room hit you like a wave, making your head swim, and you stopped just inside the door, breathing heavily.

Sebastian, stood in front of a table and sorted through papers, glanced up the moment you entered. His usual sarcastic smile froze as his gaze took in your appearance.

You looked a mess—soaked, shivering, and pale, with dark circles under your eyes and a slight flush on your cheeks from the fever you were clearly running. Water dripped from your hair, forming a small puddle on the floor beneath you. For a moment, he just stared at you, incredulous.

“Are you serious?” Sebastian’s voice broke the silence, his usual dry tone tinged with something close to concern. “You look like death warmed up in a microwave. I don't sell coffins here yet.

You tried to muster a reply, maybe something sarcastic, but all that came out was a hoarse cough. The effort left you feeling even more drained than before. Sebastian’s expression softened as he sighed, slithering over to you with a quick glance at the water-soaked floor.

“Come on,” he muttered, shaking his head. “You're staying here. There’s no way I’m letting you go back out like this.”

You didn’t have the energy to argue—not that you would, honestly. The idea of staying in Sebastian’s warm, quiet shop was far more appealing than going back out into the cold, miserable hallways. You let him guide you through the cluttered aisles, past shelves filled with oddities and relics, to a back room that you had only seen in passing.

It was cozy, with a pile of blankets by the barely functioning heater and a couple of scattered books on a nearby table. Sebastian, ever practical despite his tendency to tease, pointed to the pile of blankets. “Sit. Don’t move.”

You collapsed into the pile, grateful for the soft fabrics that seemed to envelop you. The warmth of the heater seeped into your cold, aching limbs, and you closed your eyes for a moment, just trying to shake off the chill that had settled deep into your bones.

Sebastian disappeared for a moment, only to return with a towel, some dry clothes, and a steaming cup of whatever liquid he had in the cup. He tossed the towel onto your lap and then held out the cup, raising an eyebrow when you blinked up at him, surprised.

“I’m not going to sit here and watch you shiver to death,” he said, the corners of his mouth twitching in what might’ve been a smile. “Drink up, and then get changed. I’ll turn around if you’re shy.”

You snorted at that, though it turned into another cough. “I think I’m too tired to care.”

Still, his comment brought a bit of warmth to your chest. Sebastian wasn’t always the most outwardly affectionate person, but he had his moments. You took the cup from his hands, wrapping your fingers around it and letting the heat sink into your cold palms.

The tea-like liquid was soothing as it slid down your throat, easing some of the tightness that had built up. Meanwhile, Sebastian busied himself by pulling a blanket from a nearby chest and draping it over your shoulders, creating a little nest of warmth around you.

“Why didn’t you say something?” he asked quietly as he settled onto the edge of a nearby table, watching you closely. “You’re not exactly subtle when you're sick.”

“I thought I could handle it,” you mumbled, tugging the blanket closer. “Didn’t want to bother you.”

Sebastian gave you a look that clearly said, *Are you kidding me?*

“You’re soaked and half-dead, and you thought that wasn’t worth mentioning?” he asked, crossing his arms. “I think that qualifies as a situation where bothering me is okay.”

You sighed, leaning back into the blankets. The heater running softly in the background, the sound oddly comforting as the warmth of the tea and the room finally started to loosen the tightness in your chest.

“Sorry,” you muttered. “I’m just… tired.”

“I’d imagine so,” Sebastian replied, his voice softer now, less teasing. “But next time, just tell me. You don’t have to go through this alone.”

You met his eyes, feeling a mix of gratitude and exhaustion wash over you. “Thanks.”

He nodded, brushing it off with a wave of his hand, though you could tell he was relieved that you were finally letting him help. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t get all sentimental on me. Just rest, alright?”

You smiled faintly, shifting in the pile to get more comfortable. The heater, the warmth, the steady presence of Sebastian nearby—it all worked to lull you into a sense of peace that you hadn’t felt in days.

As you started to drift off, you felt a gentle hand on your shoulder. “I’ll keep an eye on you,” Sebastian murmured. “Just sleep.”

For once, you didn’t fight it. You let yourself relax, your body finally giving in to the exhaustion that had been gnawing at you for so long. And as you fell into a much-needed sleep, you knew you were safe. You were warm, you were cared for—and for the first time in a while, you didn’t feel so alone.

When you woke up later, the room was dim, and the heater had cooled down a bit. Sebastian was still there, sitting in a nearby corner, flipping through a file. He glanced up when he noticed you stirring.

“Feeling better?” he asked, his tone casual, though there was an underlying note of concern.

You nodded, your throat still a little sore, but the rest of you felt… better. Lighter, maybe. “Yeah. A bit.”

“Good.” He closed the book and stood up, stretching. “You’re staying here until you’re completely better. I’m not letting you back out there until I’m sure you won’t collapse in a puddle somewhere.”

You smiled, feeling a warmth spread through you that had felt oddly comforting. “Deal.”

And for the first time in what felt like forever, you truly meant it.

[soapssuds]

There is No Law that Emperors Must be Fair

Emperor ! Jing Yuan x Princess ! Reader

Chapter 4 | Honeyed Words and Commonplace Lies

Summary | You are set to marry the Emperor, Jing Yuan. In order to break the engagement, you stage an accident and fake having amnesia. But now, your own cruel, cold, and distant fiancé, who seemed to not want anything to do with you, is now acting all lovey dovey!

Note | reposted because the original wasn't letting me edit it

want to be a part of the taglist? then pls go to taglist ^-^

Previous | Fic Masterlist | Next

You smoothed your dress out.

"If you keep fretting, then the Emperor will know you're faking."

You sent Blade a side glare, "well, I wouldn't be worrying if you and the vidyadhara hadn't tasked me with-"

There was a knock at the door which effectively shut you up. Your eyes glancing to Blade then at the door.

"Enter."

The moment the word left his mouth, you tried to calm your racing heart.

"Blade. How is she?"

Your ever vigilant and very annoying guard bowed to the Emperor, "she's already awake," he said as he gestured towards you.

And you were quick to follow in a bow.

You never really got to meet the Emperor up close, except for that one time that he took you away from your home. So being so close to him now was ...frightening.

"Y- your highness. I- I deeply apologize for the mess that I caused, but I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive- forgive me," you stumbled over your words, your syllables wobbling out of your mouth. You could just start crying here and now!

"Has Blade told you anything else?"

You bit your lip as you mimicked a thinking face, "he told me... told me that I'm a princess and that I'm supposed to marry you, but I- I'm sorry. I don't... I don't remember you at all."

No time for crying now! This was your chance. To make him believe your act, or die trying.

So, as you stood before him. Lips trembling and eyes watering, you watched as he silently looked you over. Contemplating his next move.

Though, he didn't judge for long as he took long strides for you. Blade, eyes widening, moved his hand to the hilt of his sword. If he needed to, he would kill you, just as you both had promised, but-

Surprisingly, he didn't have to. As in the next moment, Jing Yuan had swept you up into his arms into a bone crushing hug. His arms wrapping tight around your waist as he pressed your face into his chest.

Blade dropped his hand from the hilt of his sword. Blood red eyes, watching carefully for any hints of danger to your safety.

"It's alright my love."

MY LOVE?! You and Blade both thought in unison.

"Even if you don't remember the love we shared with another. I'll be more than happy to travel this road again with you."

Again?! What road?! You hate my guts!

Jing Yuan then pulled a little away from you. His fingers gently brushing against the softness of your cheek. His eyes, you noticed as you looked up at him, held so much love and adoration, you wondered where these feelings were at the beginning.

But...

No matter.

You knew how he truly was. You weren't going to fall for any of this!

With that in mind, you decided to play the part as you raised your hand to cup his hand that was cradling your cheek.

"Th- thank you so much for not giving up on me. I- I hope that I'll be able to remember you and the love we shared."

Your breath hitched when Jing Yuan leaned down and placed a tender kiss against your forehead. His lips felt incredibly soft. You couldn't stop yourself from leaning into it with how warm he felt against your head.

"No matter how long it takes, I'll be here."

You gave him a light smile, "thank you, your highness."

Jing Yuan chuckled softly, his thumb tracing the skin of your cheekbone, "we're engaged, you know. You can call me by my name."

You felt how hot your face got as you stumbled your words out, "i- I deeply apologize again your highness, but Blade has only referred to you as the Emperor. So I- I- I'm afraid I don't remember your name either."

You felt your hand fall from his as he moved his hold from your cheek, down your jawline and to your neck. His fingers resting there gently as you felt your pulse quicken, your breath immediately becoming uneven.

Blade grabbed the hilt of his sword again.

Then, using his thumb, he pushed it underneath your chin, forcing your head to tilt up so you were looking into his bright, gold eyes. The color flickering in a dangerous light. His face was close, too close. His lips slowly brushing against your mouth as he spoke.

"My name is Jing Yuan. Don't forget it again, little sparrow."

You nodded, but the moment you did, you felt his fingers dig into your neck a bit, "say it."

"Jing- Jing Yuan."

Your voice came out breathless as your hands raised up to grab at his wrist. Your chest felt heavy, your lungs constricted.

You were panicking.

But soon, that panic was gone when Blade's voice broke out into the room, "she's still recovering Your Highness. It's probably best if you don't rile her up too much. You both have all the time in the world for her to remember you, after all."

Alright, so maybe Blade wasn't completely annoying.

Jing Yuan let go of your neck after pressing another kiss to your forehead.

"You're right. We have all the time in the world," he stepped away from you, "but before I leave. I advise for you to get some more rest before lunch comes around."

"Why," you managed to utter out, your whole being still shaking from the exchange.

"Because," Jing Yuan smirked at you, "we're going out."

[moonystoes]

Tiktok Trend - Elisa De Almeida

Summary: you and Elisa decide to hard launch by doing a tiktok trend.

A/n: heyyy!! This was actually my first ever fic (January 5th) and I completely forgot about it until I decided to clean up my notes app and couldn't even recognize it. It's quite short ( and a mess) but sweet. Enjoy!!!

"Okay let's do this tiktok trend you showed me!" Elisa jumped up from the beige couch excitedly. It was you who showed her the tiktok trend where couples tell the camera what they like and hate about each other, but it wasn't your intention to film one. She was skeptical about posting a lot of photos of you on her account, worried if her fans would bother you. And although it annoyed you at first that she's hiding you, it made you warm that she's doing all of this for your comfort.

But fanpages had already found your accounts on tiktok and instagram, stalking your posts and going through your stories every time you post. At first it made you uncomfortable, but you had accepted it for the sake of elisa. Some of them are nice, ones that you look through their edits and content and smile. But of course there were some that sent you weird messages about leaving their 'wife'.

"Are you sure it's a good idea? I haven't posted tiktoks about you yet."

"I mean... do you not want to? It's your account. And besides, you have already posted photos of me on Instagram so they're aware of us." Her sudden energy slightly deflated when she heard your hesitant tone.

"Yes! I don't mind it at all. Ehm... okay sit next to me and I'll prop my phone here." You pointed next to you on the couch, grabbing your phone and angling it on the coffee table perfectly to show the both of you.

You took a deep breath as you opened tiktok. You knew there was no going back once you do this, they will either love you or completely harass you.

"Hey I'm here with elisa and we have to say one thing we hate about each other." You touched your hair, making sure it's not a mess. Elisa can sense you being worried, she softly intertwined her hand with your other one.

"Why hate? Why not love?" She fake frowned, "wow is there no love in your heart?" She looked at the camera with a raised eyebrow in fake-shock.

"Oh my god!" You rolled your eyes, "we will start with hate and then love. So if you get pissed at what I hate about you, you'd feel better about the love." You played with her thin cross bracelet, your eyes zoning out at the sight of her veiny hand. She looked back at you with a sarcastic angry face and a soft hum.

"Okay who will start?" She asked. Her gaze softening when she realized that you're not listening. She squeezed your hand, making you look up towards her face with a slight flushed face.

It was obvious that her hands and arms were distracting to you, she had noticed your fascination to them since your first date. At first she thought there was something like a sauce or maybe a bug on her hand when your eyes kept going down there, but there wasn't a thing there and it didn't take her long to understand.

"I'll start," she whispered, "I don't like it when you...always put others first, sometimes you need to be selfish and think about yourself." She whispered, her other hand playing with the button of your shirt.

You looked away to stop the blushing, realizing that if you looked at her eyes you'd probably stammer and never end up saying what you want. The amount PDA she's doing is stressing you a little, worried what the media would think. "What I don't like about you is... the tech fleece." You laughed at the way her face dropped.

"Are you serious? Mine was so romantic and yours is just so mean!" She let go of your hand, turning to the camera and folding her arms over her chest. "Wow you guys are witnessing a break up right now. The best thing about you is...the break up right now."

"Okay whatever, the best part about you is-"

"My hands!"

"Huh?" You looked at her face in confusion. She burst out laughing, her head tilting back and her hands clutching her side.

When realization hit, your face had a small shameful frown. You really thought you were slick admiring them, but she obviously knows you a little too much.

"Whatever, my favorite part about you is your smile." Elisa brushed off your reaction as she responded. She placed her arm around your shoulder and pulling you into her side, a soft smile blossomed in your face at the mention.

You hoped your blush was not obvious when you looked back at the small screen. You reached for the phone and ended the video, making a quick caption: "She got mad but it's the truth and you guys know it too."

You threw the phone to Elisa, obviously too scared to press 'post'. She held into your hand tightly and did it for you, before turning to look at you and shrugging, "done."

Since your job was at the evening, it wasn't hard to avoid your phone all day. It was until 10pm when the both of you cuddled in bed. Elisa's face was resting on the nape of your neck, she tapped your arm quickly as she huffed in frustration.

You stopped scrolling on Twitter to glare at her, "what?"

"Tiktok time before we sleep," she lifted her head to give you a pout, making you giggle and roll your eyes. It has been a routine for you to go on tiktok and her just staring at your screen before sleeping. The first time it happened was when you had your first night at her apartment, and you can vividly recall her face trying to pretend that she wasnt looking at your screen until you called her out for it.

"Fine," you laughed and went on tiktok, but the '99+' notifications reminded you of the video you made. Elisa noticed your uneasy look, before pressing the little envelope to see them.

The video already had around 50k likes, which was surprising since your usual ones get around 3000 only. You scrolled through the comments, many of them were in Portuguese since she's mostly popular in Brazil.

"You know... I don't feel so bad now that I don't speak Portuguese, because I don't wanna know what all of this is about."

Elisa sat up and grabbed your phone from your hands, she leaned in closer to your screen since she wasn't wearing her glasses, "umm...some of them are crying about me not being single, and...about us being touchy."

You remained quiet for a second, "so none of them are rude to me, yeah?" You glanced at her face as she turned to look at you, "don't lie, I wanna know what they think about me."

Elisa leaned in close and hugged you, she can hear the insecurity in your voice, "none of them are mean to you, I promise. They're just hurt that this sexy, hot, talented, beautiful woman has a girlfriend. But that's it."

You sarcastically pushed her away, "you don't even describe me that way."

She laughed and continued scrolling. By now, the comments became more international. Arabic, Spanish, French, English and more. You can understand some of them, which made your body relax when you realized Elisa was somewhat right.

"Omg what 💀💀"

"Noooooooo she's not single wtf"

"Please why is Elisa so touchy (im gonna cry I wish that was me)"

"Guys be nice to the poor girl, she looks so stressed posting this. We need to let her know that she's loved and appreciated by us 💞💞 (we need more content of elisa tho, plz y/n 🙏)"

"Please why are they cute"

"OMG WAG?? WE NEED SERIOUS WAG SERIES Y/N IF YOU'RE WATCHING THIS PLEASE"

"I think I just heard my heart get crushed. As long as she's happy"

"Why is Elisa with someone like that? She deserves way better 🤮"

Your eyes quickly looked away from the phone. Of course you'll get hate. There is no way you can please the millions that are thirsting for her.

Since Elisa's English isn't the best, it took her way longer to read that comment than you. She glanced at you as you were adjusting your pillow, preparing yourself to sleep.

She sighed and turned off your phone, reaching out to put it delicately on your nightstand, "baby...you know that they're just jealous of you, right?"

She placed her hand on you side and pulled you closer. She hated how you weren't facing her, it made it harder for her to see your features and emotions.

"You're the most beautiful and pure woman I've ever seen, I love everything about you and they clearly don't know anything for them to say a thing," she can feel your tense body slowly relax, "the truth is...dating someone that's famous, there are so many childish teens being obsessed and have no respect for others. It doesn't matter what that person says, because I'm happy with you and I hope I make you feel the things you make me feel."

You slowly turned around to face her, a soft grateful smile in your sleepy face, "I love you, and I'm so happy I bumped into you that day...I don't care what they say, I just hope I don't disappoint them."

"You'll never disappoint me, and they got to see only a minute of us...while I get 24 hours of you."

It softened your heart talking to her about all of this, feeling a little lighter after having this conversation. Within the 6 months of you dating, you were too scared to bring this topic up. And Elisa knew about it but waited for the moment you were comfortable enough to speak.

You leaned in closer to her as you placed your palm on her cheek, pulling her in to give her a peck. Elisa pulled you in closer to deepen the kiss, "I love you so much, y/n. I would make a whole tiktok account to bully the bullies if I had to."

You cackled at the comment, resting your head on her chest, "I love you too...but please don't do that,"

"Hmm...I just want to protect my princess," she joked.

"Goodnight, Eli."

"Goodnight."

___

~ Pleaseee hit my inbox if you have ideas because this was the last one in my brain

~ sorry if this isn't the best, I genuinely didn't know how to make it right

[myfictionaldreams]

Family // Poly!Marauders x Fem!Reader

Summary: Sirius Black, the usually happy prankster within Hogwarts, had a special skill for hiding his emotions. Until one day, he's forced to face the realities of the troubles with his family.

Requested by: @bullets-from-another-dimension Thank you so much for the request and for showing me that Sirius needs a little more love! I hope you like this fic, and thanks for your support with the poly!marauders ♥

Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, angst (lots!), fluff (also lots!), emotional hurt, discussion of Sirius' abusive family, disowned, crying, hugs/kissing, polyamory relationship, nipple play, body worship, making out, oral sex (m receiving), happy ending

A/N: This is just a little PSA that I'll be going through my other Poly!Marauders fics sometime soon to change some bits to make sure that each of the boys is getting enough love! It won't be anything major for the overall story, just spreading the love equally as it appears Sirius may have been skipped a few times (and I don't want that!), so check for an 'edited' note on the story. Thank you for pointing this out to me!

Words: 4.8k

my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link

The last 24 hours had been an emotional rollercoaster, with both positives and negatives coming to light. It had started with the ultimate showdown game of Quidditch between Slytherin and Gryffindor; with both Sirius and James on the team. You and Remus had been nervous wrecks just for the game, let alone all the tension drowning within the two enemy houses. This escalated outside of the pitch, with wands having to remain in hands between lessons to prepare for sabotage attacks from either team.

It was endlessly tiring the days leading up to the events, and it was some kind of a miracle to be standing in the Gryffindors' stands without a single injury. Now, however, you and Remus had to live through the fear of watching your boyfriends fly around with their roles as Seeker and Beater.

You were sure you’d accidentally bitten your nail down to the cuticle by the end of the match, and your throat felt as if you’d swallowed sandpaper with how sore it was with the screaming and shouting you’d been doing in support. There was instant relief as James finally caught the snitch, and everyone cheered.

“Do you think he’ll be ok?” you shout up to Remus, who, with his height difference, could see over the crowd to where the commotion was occurring on the pitch. As James had dived for the snitch, so had the Slytherin’s seeker, who just happened to be Sirius’ brother, Regulus. However, in mid-dive, Regulus accidentally knocked into one of the goalposts, hitting his head and falling from his broom. Thankfully to the Slytherins, Sirius had been close by and caught his falling brother from gaining any further injuries.

Remus was nodding to your question, “Yes, he’s walking away, well - he’s pushing Sirius away, so I’m sure he’s just fine”, he explained, watching Regulus shove Sirius, so the man stumbled away. A pang of guilt settled heavily in your stomach at the thought of the brothers arguing. You knew that the relationship between Sirius and his brother was non-existent these days, and it only made you feel more awful for your boyfriend, understanding how difficult it must have been to lose his family in the way he has.

You couldn’t ponder on these thoughts as the entirety of Gryffindor and the vast majority of Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff began celebrating the win. This included Sirius, who scooped you into an exaggerated hug, spun you high into the air, and carefully placed your feet back onto the floor.

“Was your brother alright?” You shout to Sirius over the noisy crowd forming around the winning team. For a split second, you witness sadness filling his grey eyes before he snaps out of it and a beaming smile replacing the momentary lapse in his emotions.

“Oh, he’s fine; I’m sure a quick knock to the head will bring some sense to him. Anyway, come on, let’s all go back to the common room; I have a special surprise for everyone”. Sirius was great at many things, and covering his emotions was one of them. Any attempts to open up about the situation regarding his family would change the subject within the blink of an eye. You respected that he didn’t want to talk about any of his family members, but you still kept a close eye on him, making sure that he didn’t pent up his emotions until he was at breaking point, which you feared would occur one day as there was only so much one person could go through.

The interaction with Regulus seemed to have been forgotten in the madness of celebrating, which ran into the early morning hours in the Gryffindor common room. It would have continued later, but Professor McGonagall arrived in her dressing gown and demanded everyone go to bed. Sirius needed the most help to bed, having drunk the ‘surprise’ fire whiskey he regretted deeply in the morning.

“I’m never drinking again. Who’s idea was it anyway to bring Firewhiskey?!” came the deep groan of the man lying face first beside you, his face thoroughly buried into the pillow. Your temples were pounding slightly; you’d felt worse hangovers, but it was still uncomfortable as you rolled over towards Sirius.

Your arm wrapped over his naked back, face pressed over his shoulder blade as you could feel the toned muscles adjusting to your presence as you melted into his warmth. “It was your idea. I’m never falling for your charms ever again, Sirius”, you mumbled against his skin, reminiscing on his sweet talking skills from last night that convinced you to have a drinking competition with him.

This pulled him out of the half-unconscious state as his mop of hair turned in your direction. The movement caused you to roll off him and witness the beautiful sight of his morning glow; even in his hangover, he was handsome with one eye squished closed as the room was too bright.

Sirius turned his body entirely towards you, huffing as he moved, and you refrained from trying to reach out and control the usually silky locks of hair that were now all knotted and tangled on the top of his head. “Oh yeah? I’m pretty sure my charms made you cum three times before the fire whiskey joined the party,” he commented confidently and admired the warmth that filled your face. You attempted to hide your smile at the memories but were soon fully scream-laughing as Sirius tried to break your facade by tickling your sides.

Pushing him away, you turned and nuzzled into the naked chest of James, who remained asleep even through your loud laughter, but his arms still wrapped around your shoulders protectively. Besides James, you could see Remus was awake, sitting up and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “Remusssss, Sirius is being mean to me”, you drawl childishly.

The man sighed, dropping his hands to give you and Sirius a pointed look, “Please, children, it’s too early, and my head is too painful for you to make this much noise”.

Sirius smirked as he spooned in close behind you, wrapping his arm around you and James as everyone tried to have a few more moments of beautiful sleep before breakfast, and class pulled the four of you from the safety of the bed.

The food helped to settle the hangovers that the majority of Gryffindor seemed to be nursing this morning, much to the displeasure of McGonagall, who was glaring at her house from the Professor’s table. Sitting beside James, you leaned across him for another slice of toast as Sirius sat opposite you with Remus next to him.

As everyone started to be rejuvenated with energy from the breakfast, the owls began to swoop in and deliver the mail for the day. An emerald-coloured envelope landed on Sirius's lap, which caught the attention of you and the fellow Marauders. You already had your suspicions about who the letter was from. Sirius mostly confirmed it, as he had hardly read the letter before shoving it into his bag and brushing off any attempts at discussing who it was from.

“It’s nothing, just some spam letter. So, who do we have first today? Is it transfiguration? I can’t imagine that will be fun with how angry McGonagall looks right now.” Sirius changed the subject, but it didn’t convince any of you as you eyed him sadly. He didn’t wait for a response as he stood, gripping his bag so tight that his knuckles turned white. “Come on, otherwise we’ll be late”.

You knew something was off just by the quipped tone of his voice, and the humour and light that always seemed to dance in his eyes had been significantly dimmed. Even as James tried to humour him with his usual party tricks and jokes, it only earned him a half-assed chuckle from Sirius. Remus even attempted to pull him aside before entering the classroom to see if he needed a moment alone to talk, but Sirius just distracted him with a quick kiss and said he was fine.

You were quick to sit next to Sirius near the back of the classroom, smiling brightly with the hopes that he would return it, but it seemed he was lost in his thoughts as he idly arranged his parchment paper and quills. Thankfully, as the class began, his hand rested on your thigh so you could link both fingers together, lifting it and kissing the back of his hand.

As McGonagall began to teach the class, you leaned closer to Sirius, savouring the warmth that radiated off him and smelling the citrusy scent from his aftershave. “Is everyone ok, Sirius?” Your voice was barely audible so as not to disrupt the class, but you knew he heard as his posture stiffened, and he nodded his head, fake smiling for a second before returning his attention to the teacher. “I know there’s something wrong. Talking might help; I mean - I want to help-”

“Excuse me at the back. Is there something more important than my lesson?” McGonagall demanded with a passive-aggressive raised eyebrow as all other eyes turned to look at you and Sirius.

As your mouth opened to take the blame, your boyfriend beat you to it, “Sorry, Professor. That was my fault I was distracting her”.

“You’re already on thin ice after last night's antics, Mr Black. See me after class to arrange a detention”.

Your mouth drops open to retort to her and tell him it wasn’t Sirius, but the hand holding yours squeezes, stopping you from saying anything. As McGonagall turns back to write on the chalkboard, you lean close to harshly whisper, “You didn’t have to do that, Sirius! That should have been my detention!”

“It’s only one detention, I don’t care”, he shrugs nonchalantly, releasing your hand to begin writing his notes. You frown so deeply that a line forms between your eyebrows as you glance towards Remus and James, who have similar expressions of worry, especially as Sirius hasn’t even attempted to have any sort of friendly banter with McGonagall like he usually did.

At lunch, Sirius had somehow managed to slip away from the group, and your head seemed to be fixated towards the entrance to the Great Hall, neck straining to see over the other students as you waited for him to walk in.

“I mean, it’s not just me, right? There’s definitely something wrong with him”, you say before nervously nibbling on your lower lip.

Remus’ hand cups your shoulder, gripping gently as he agrees, “It’s not just you. I tried to talk to him before the lesson, but he just pushed me away. He just wants to be by himself; I’m sure he’ll be just fine”.

You nod to yourself but don’t believe his words. Yes, Sirius was strong and had been putting on a strong appearance for years, but he never pushed himself away from the three of you. It was like an invisible angel on your shoulder, trying to nudge you towards him, knowing something wasn’t right.

“Have either of you got the Marauder's map?” you ask Remus and James, who then check their pockets and school bags but cannot find the map.

“Sorry, Love, he’s probably got it with him”, James reports, appearing as deflated as you felt.

Standing from the table, the anxious causing your stomach to clench with unease and unable to eat, you inform the two of them, “I’ll be back later; I just need to make sure he’s ok and safe”.

Remus and James nod in understanding and watch you go. As you stand in the entrance to the Great Hall, you’re unsure where to start and what's worse is that he could be in his Padfoot form, which means he’d be able to hear you coming and run away. There were the grounds to search, Hogsmeade, the entirety of the enormous castle; there were plenty of places for him to be.

Taking a deep breath to steady your nerves, you decided to search the dormitory first, hoping the map had been left in a draw up there.

Opening the door to the dormitory room that you shared with your boyfriends, you were welcomed to the sight of Sirius, lying face first on the shared bed, his head turned away from the doors but from the noticeable sniffling noises and his shoulders shaking, you knew he was crying. Your heart felt like someone had reached inside your chest and squeezed as the sight rocked you. Silently as you could, you slipped your shoes off and placed your school bag onto the floor.

You knew he was aware someone else was in the room as his cries softened, and he subtly tried to wipe his face into the pillow. As you began to crawl onto the bed, you could see he was spooning the pillow you usually used to sleep on, clutching it desperately close to his chest. You had to remember to breathe through your nose, remain strong, and not descend into your emotions.

Kneeling next to him, your hand gently met the centre of his back, rubbing slow, comforting circles into his white shirt, hoping the action would comfort him. “Sirius, what’s wrong?”

“What? Nothing's wrong” he tried to brush it off, but you could hear the thickness of his voice as he tried to hide his face further in the pillow beneath his head.

“Is it about the letter from earlier? Who sent it to you?” Even though you knew he didn’t really want to talk about it, you knew he’d also built a wall around his emotions and wanted him to feel like he was in a safe enough space to talk, like the many times he’d done the same for you. Reaching over with your other hand, you ran your fingers through the long strands of dark hair, brushing them out of his face that was still turned away from you. “Talk to me, my love, please. I want to help you”.

Reluctantly, Sirius turned over and began to pull you down to lie in the centre of the bed. You did so and spread your arms wide as he moved to lie on your chest, the top of his head resting beneath your chin as you hugged him closely.

“No one important sent me the letter, it’s fine. I just want to cuddle”, he admits with a sigh, relaxing into the hold, the pillow he’d been spooning now forgotten about as he had the real thing instead, finding comfort instantly. In this position, you could hold him close and do the same actions as before, stroking gently up and down his back whilst also playing with his hair.

You want to tell him that you knew who the letter was from, but he seemed content with being held instead for a couple of minutes until you felt dampness seeping across the column of your neck and down your chest as his shoulders began to shake once more.

“Sirius-?”

“It was from my parents. The letter, I mean. Fuck! I don’t know, it's so stupid.” he sits up abruptly, aggressively wiping away the leaked tears he’d been desperately trying to stop.

Sitting beside him, you rubbed his shoulders while trying to calm him down from his overwhelming emotions. “It’s not stupid, my love.” As you talk, you grip his twists to pull them away so he can look into your face and hopefully see the love there. “Your parents, they’re awful people, Sirius, and anyway, you’re perfectly within your right to show emotions every once in a while; I just need you to know that I’m here for you, we’re all here for you, no matter how you are feeling. It’ll be ok”.

Even though it was comforting for him to hear the words, it still seemed to break something within him. Like a crack had formed in the dam as he relented with his cries, openly sobbing into his hands. Whilst trying to swallow the lump that had developed in your throat, you pulled him close, kissing every part of him that you could reach whilst wiping away the cascading tears.

“You don’t have to tell me what was said in the letter, but I just need you to know that they’re not your real family; you know we’re all your family”. Sirius pulls back from the hug, and your bottom lip trembles at seeing how heartbroken he looks. The area around his eyes is swollen and red to match the shade at the tip of his nose as wetness covers the length of his cheeks.

His mouth opens to say something, but he’s interrupted by the door opening and James and Remus stepping into the bedroom. The two men pause, not expecting to find either you or Sirius here, but as they see the sadness and pain on Sirius’s face, they immediately drop their school bags.

“You missed it”, Sirius chuckled, trying to hide his upset behind humour, “She called me an emotional prick, and the waterworks started”. James and Remus gave him sad smiles, but neither fell for the attempt to change the subject as both sat either side of him on the bed. Remus reached for him first, stroking his scarred fingers through the strands of dark hair that had fallen over Sirius’ face, but only so he could kiss the area beneath. Sirius closed his eyes at the touch and leaned into it, releasing a deep sigh through his open mouth.

James grabbed each of his hands, lifting them to his lips to kiss the palms lovingly and rest them on either side of his cheeks, nuzzling into his hands. “Whatever is going on, you know we’re always here for you, Sirius”, James mutters against the palms on his face.

Sirius sighs even heavier as if trying to will the anxiety away through the breaths. “It’s my parents. I mean, should I even call them parents when they’ve already disowned me? But they’ve just sent me more threats today after what happened with Regulus yesterday. They say things like I should have let him win and wish that I had been hurt.”

He takes a moment to compose himself as you grab one of his hands from James, needing to link your fingers together and squeeze to know that it is a safe place for him to continue and talk. Sirius looked into his lap as he spoke, “They’ve burnt my face off the Black family tree. Not that I care; I expected it, but it just all feels so real now, you know? I feel like I shouldn’t even be using the surname Black with how much they detest me. I also kind of expected Regulus to have my back a little bit, but he’s young; I can’t expect that from him, especially as I know what my parents are like, but he doesn’t even say hi to me in the corridors anymore. I don’t know. I guess I’m just a little all over the place, and with the positivity yesterday, just to have my family metaphorically kick me to the curb again, I should have expected the joy wouldn’t last long”.

Sirius sounded empty and emotionless as he expressed how he was genuinely feeling, struggling to come to terms with the repercussions of the events that occurred with his family that continue to affect him.

“Fuck them”, James says with all the venom and confidence that he could muster. Sirius grunts half-heartedly at the declaration, not seemingly convinced, so James turns his face towards him so that he is looking into the stormy hazel eyes. “I’m being serious, fuck them. You’ve been my family for years now; you know my parents consider you their son as much as I am. Nothing has changed. You live with me and my parents because that is your home. Wherever any of us go is your home because we love you. We wouldn’t make you feel half as rotten as those scumbags, do you understand?”

Sirius nods, swallowing thickly, causing his Adam’s apple to bob. Before he can respond, Remus once again holds onto his face, turning him in the other direction to look at the calmest Marauder. “Sirius, next time you receive a letter from them, don’t open it. They are cruel humans who have no love for anyone but themselves and the prejudices that they live by. You had so much joy and love in your heart; don’t let them destroy you and ruin everything you cherish. And that is exactly what James has said. You’re our family. We’re each other's family. You’re ours, just like you’re mine. Get it?”

Sirius’ eyes have dried as he looks up at Remus, and briefly, a genuine smile welcomes across his face as he leans in to kiss him deeply but then pulls back.

Squeezing his hand, you draw his attention towards you. “You deserve the surname Black more than anyone because it’s what makes you, you—breaking the stereotypes of those evil people and making it mean something that doesn't symbolise hatred. However, if you want to have another surname, you can! Sirius, you’re your own person, and your surname doesn’t define you. You could even make up a whole new name! Maybe you could have one of our surnames”, Sirius laughs at the possibility of a name change. “I love you so much. Your family's opinions of you aren’t how anyone else in the castle sees you. You’re perfect the way you are, Mr Black”.

You couldn’t wait any more time to kiss him, needing to feel his lips against yours and reassure him further with these intimate touches.  Thankfully, to your pounding heart, he smiles into the kiss.

“Maybe we could put all of our surnames together”, he jokes as you move to kiss each of his cheeks. 

“If that’s what you want, I’d do it”, you reassure him with a kiss on his temple.

“Almost sounds like a proposal”, he casually mentions, causing your heartbeat to increase rapidly. Sirius smirks at your face but reassures, “Maybe we’ll sort out surnames once we’ve finished our exams”. You press your lips against his once more for reassurance until he looks between the three of you. “Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do if it weren’t for you three. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed before coming to Hogwarts, let alone feel love like this”.

Remus could see the tears pooling along Sirius’ lashline, so he gently cupped the side of his head, wiping away any that fell. “No more tears for them”. The gap between their lips was closed as Remus kissed him passionately, holding the back of his head carefully as they breathed each other in.

Sirius’ head dips slightly, but only to whisper against the man’s lips, “Can you make me forget? Please?”

“I’ll do whatever you want me to do, Sirius”. Remus kisses him again but with more urgency, pushing his body back until Sirius is lying in the centre of the bed with the taller Marauder hovering above him. Their mouths moved together as one, tongues twirling together, heads tilting one way and then the other.

As Remus distracts and devours him with his mouth, Sirius’ hands move around the back of his head, holding him close, which gives James the freedom to move his hands to Sirius’ shirt. With a simple flick of his fingers, James could undo the buttons down the centre of his chest, releasing the toned chest and abdomen of the man whose legs you were sitting between.

You watched with the sadness seeping away and becoming replaced with arousal as James leaned over and licked the nipples of the man who moaned into Remus’ mouth. James was calculated with his movements, making sure to leave teasing licks and bites over the areas that Sirius was most sensitive whilst then worshipping the perked nipples on his chest, his hands caressing the areas where fine dark hair was beginning to grow back from being previous shaved, mainly the snail trail leading beneath his trousers.

Smiling whilst watching them all move together, you were gifted the view of watching the tightness forming in his trousers as his cock grew hard and thick. Without any rush and admiring the desperate moans coming from the man on his back, you began to stroke up his thighs, over his crotch and pausing over his zipper.

Undoing it slowly, you waited to see if Sirius was even aware of what you were doing as he was so distracted with James and  Remus. However, with the sudden lift of his hips to help you pull the material down his hips, you knew he was very much aware of your intentions.

Freeing his cock from the restraint of his trousers and boxers, you watched as Sirius lowered his hips back onto the bed, and his member now throbbed on his abdomen, thick and hard. A pearly drip of precum had already formed at the tip, and you were quick to hold the base, lifting the cock until your lips were wrapped around him.

Your movements continue to be gentle and soft. Licking and sucking without any rush to build the tension and hopefully show how much you worship the ground he walks on by paying particular attention to him when he needs it most. James continues to tweak his nipples, and Remus devours his mouth, absorbing every little moan until Sirius needs to pull back to suck in air.

“Fuck, you’re all- Fuck!” Remus distracts him with his mouth once more, dominating him entirely and causing more whimpers to burst from his chest. The veiny length that was being leisurely sucked in your mouth began to harden further, throbbing as you knew he was approaching closer to his orgasm as your hands fondled his balls.

“So good for us, aren’t you, Sirius? Say it, tell us you’re ours”, James demands, pulling on the back of Remus’ hair so that Sirius can tell the group how he is feeling.

“Yes! I’m yours, I’m all of yours! I’m cumming, holy shit!” he shouts out desperately, face scrunching up like he is in pain but is actually experiencing the opposite as overwhelming pleasure pooled in his abdomen.

You moan around his cock, causing it to vibrate slightly against your tongue as his hot seed begins to coat your throat. You swallow every salty, thick liquid drop until you’re popping off and looking up at his half-lidded, satisfied grin.

James and Remus give you room to crawl up his body to kiss him sweetly. The three of you watch and admire as he comes down from the high, carefully tucking his half-hard cock back into his trousers and doing up the zipper once more.

“Thank Merlin that we have no classes this afternoon”, Sirius jokes as he rests back on the pillows with his arm behind his head. You laugh and collapse onto his chest, hugging him closely as the four of you sit in comfortable silence. You listened to the thump of his heart beneath your ear, but after a while, it increased in speed as he became restless.

“Can I tell you all a secret? I’ve um… I’ve kept all of the threatening letters they’ve sent to me, " Sirius admits as he carefully pulls out of the hug to climb out of bed and dig his way through the suitcase with his name on the side. From within, he pulls out a large stack of letters that are all opened and in the same shade of emerald as the one earlier this morning.

“You kept them all? Oh, Sirius”, you say in shock, only guessing what horrible, hateful words are written on those pieces of paper.

Sirius awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck, looking embarrassed, “Yeah. I don’t know why. Some weird part of me thought that if I burned them all, they would know and come to the school or something. But, I want to get rid of them if you’ll all help me?”

Neither of you have to answer as you climb out of the bed. After dressing appropriately, the four of you walked down to the lake, where Remus carved a hole into the soil. Sirius chucks the letters within as you all form a semi-circle.

Holding onto his left hand, Sirius raised his wand to the right, pointing it towards the letters and shouting ‘Incendio’. The four of you stand together as the letters burn. Sirius sighs shakily as he holds back tears. “It’s weird. I know people say it’s like a weight off your shoulders, but it genuinely does feel like that”.

“That’s because you’re free, Padfoot!” James shouts enthusiastically, grabbing the boy around the waist and lifting him into the air, hollering and whooping until Sirius laughs. The two crash to the ground as Remus throws his arm around your shoulders, watching the pair finally have some fun today as the smoke billows into the air surrounding you, the ash from those horrible words written on the paper disappearing across the Scottish mountains.

[wwinterwitch]

nothing compares | namor x fem!reader

summary: there's not really a plot, it's just filth

pairing: namor x human!fem!reader

word count: 1,8K

warnings/what to expect: SMUT 18+ (MINORS DNI), grinding, oral (fem receiving), overstimulation, fingering, p in v sex (unprotected), multiple orgasms, dirty talk, kinda softdom!namor, established relationship, not explicit but reader is latina/has latin american roots, spoilers free

note: I just really needed to write something involving this painfully hot man or I would've combust. I hope you enjoy!

note 2: My fic used to include Namor talking in spanish but it's been edited out to be respectful of his background. I will keep the reader's expression in spanish tho because it's my own little way of celebrating my latine roots after watching the movie and I don't want my fic to lose that because it does mean a lot me.

a reblog and/or comment on my posts really help me out as a content creator so thank you in advance if you take the time to do either!

main masterlist | marvel masterlist

There's nothing that could compare to this feeling. The sensation of his body against yours, his lips exploring your body with a devotion you've only seen in the way he makes love to you.

Everything's just perfect. From his teeth marking your neck to his hands gripping your hips just a little bit tighter whenever you pull his hair. From your fingers tracing down his firm back to his erection repeatedly rubbing against your soaked underwear.

He pulls away from your neck to meet your lips once again, practically melting into you as he leans impossibly closer, sharing a kiss so passionate you felt dizzy as your legs wrap around his hips to keep him as close as you possibly could.

A grunt left his lips when he moved his hips once again, his cock fully pressed to your clothed pussy. It was impossible to control himself as he started to move, trying to keep the slowest rhythm possible as he felt your wet underwear against him.

He moves back from the kiss, smirking when he realizes how you lean up in an attempt to continue kissing him. A hand reaches your neck to keep you in place just instants before he rocks his hips in one slow, sensual move, making you moan in response.

"You have no idea how much I missed you," Namor says, his hand around your neck still.

"Missed you too...," you're able to say, a moan escaping your lips again when he moves again, "...so much."

"Yeah?" he asks with a smirk, enjoying seeing your desperation grow with each movement of his hips. You were only able to nod. "Tell me."

"I missed you so much...I was hoping you'll come to visit me soon. It's been so long, and I can't make myself cum the way you do...I need you, mi amor. Please..."

You could feel his grip on your neck tightening as you spoke, his eyes dark with desire and his cock twitching after your confession.

Encouraged by your words, he let go of your neck to grab both of your legs, moving them away from his body to spread them open again. His hands were resting on each of your knees before trailing down the inside of your things, eyes never leaving your face as he admired your reaction to his touch.

Namor takes your panties off in a rushed, determined move. He keeps his hands on your hips right after throwing the piece of clothing to the floor, moving down your body. His tongue licks up your belly before he moves further down.

You look down to find him already looking up, smiling like he won the biggest price before he licked a single strap up your folds, the contact of his tongue against your clit sending shivers down your spine, moaning softly. He continued to taste you with his tongue. At first he was very gentle, but then he started to move his tongue way faster, his eyes looking up at you while you continued to moan for him.

He had no mercy. Sucking on your clit as hard as he could, tongue occasionally teasing your entrance, the way he didn't care to be loud and messy...he was determined to make you cum as soon as possible.

And you could feel your orgasm approaching. The fact that he repeatedly looked up at you and the work he was doing with his skillful mouth were driving you to the edge.

You cum with a loud moan, Namor's arms hooking around your legs to keep you as still as possible while he continues. It's not like it was necessary for him to move back to breathe anyway.

Managing to stand up just enough to get a better look of him, you felt like you could cum again just because of this sight. Namor holding onto you and keeping your legs open for him, eyes closed as he enjoys savoring you, almost humming against you as he continues to eat you out like it's his favorite thing in the entire world.

It was a matter of time before you felt your second orgasm approaching. By the time it hits you, you collapse back on the bed as you feel Namor's grip on you tightening to keep you from closing your legs.

The fact that you just had two orgasms only encouraged him to continue his attack at the fastest speed he could possibly achieve, his mouth creating the filthiest sounds against your wet cunt.

You had to hold onto the sheets of your bed, feeling the tears in the corner of your eyes while he sucked on your clit. Your legs shake and your whole body spasms with your third orgasm, and you felt like crying out loud when you realized he's still not going to stop.

He gave you just a couple of seconds to relax, pulling his mouth away from you but quickly moving his hand to your pussy. The feeling of his thumb barely rubbing your clit made you tremble all over again, whimpering.

"Please...," you say. It was unclear to you if you were asking for a break or for him to put his fingers inside you already.

"Please what, my love?" he questions, mouth and chin all covered in your juices. The fact that he just didn't seem to care, not wanting to clean himself off after his attack on you was slowly driving you insane.

"I– I don't..." you attempt to say, whimpering once again. "Can't...think."

Namor gives you a quick and sympathetic "Aww" in a clearly teasing manner before leaning down so his entire body would be closer to you again. His fingers start exploring your folds until they're at your entrance, making you shudder again. "What's the matter? Can't think properly when I make love to you?"

You nod eagerly, whimpering against his lips when he's kissing you again with as much devotion and need as ever. As soon as you feel two of his fingers entering you, your arms wrap around his neck in a desperate attempt to just do something. He was fucking you stupid, barely making it possible for you to move or talk without him instructing you to.

His tongue explores your mouth as his fingers curl inside you, and the taste of your own arousal invading your mouth mixed with the way his fingers move in and out of your still sensitive core only makes your situation worse.

You were so dizzy you were practically his doll right now. He could move you around however he pleases and you won't dare to complain because everything he does to your body just feels too good.

Due to how sensitive your whole body was, and the fact that his fingers kept curling inside you with no intention of ever slowing down, it was inevitable that a fourth orgasm would flow across your entire body. It forces you to move your head to the side to escape his kiss, panting as he whispers praises to you against your cheek, his hot breath hitting your skin as his fingers are still buried deep inside you.

"You think you can take my cock now?" he asks in the sweetest tone, contrasting with the words he just spoke and the way he didn't want to give your body any rest.

He awaits for your answer while he fixes your messy hair, moving it away from your face before one of his hands holds onto your chin, looking down at you. "Yes, please," was your response, earning a smirk from him.

"Always so polite," he comments in a joking manner, secretly enjoying the way you'd always ask for him to do things to you...how you never care to beg for him. He'll never get enough of it.

His fingers finally slip out of you and he moves his hand up to your lips. You understood the message fairly quickly, licking his fingers clean while he observes you proudly. He then uses that same hand to stroke himself a few times before he starts entering you in the slowest way possible, wanting to enjoy the feeling of your walls stretching around every inch of him.

You hold onto him as he enters you, every inch that disappears inside of you makes you that much desperate, rocking your hips up until he starts to hold you tighter, keeping you in place. Despite being so sensitive, you needed him to move already.

He's finally completely inside of you, and he takes a moment to take in the feeling of his cock entirely buried deep inside before moving his hips back, his cock sliding out of your tight hole as both of you moan at the feeling of it. It didn't take long for him to lose all sense of self control, starting to rock his hips in a faster rhythm as you hold onto his bicep, looking up at him with pleading eyes.

Namor completely gives in to the feeling, fucking you in a fast yet incredibly loving manner, trying to show you how much he loves you while also making it clear to you the way your body drives him crazy. To have a literal God worshiping you in this way...it was impossible for you not to let that go to your head.

He's gripping your hips with such strength, leaving a trail of sloppy kisses all around your neck, cock repeatedly hitting a particularly sensitive spot deep inside you...all of that is only contributing to your next orgasm rapidly approaching. You can tell he's close too, his grunts, praises and curses crashing into the skin of your neck like the waves were crashing against the shore the first time you met him.

"Fuck, just like that," he mutters close to your ear. "Keep squeezing me just like that," he added, the comment making you realize the way your walls are tightening around him as you're about to cum yet again thanks to him.

You finally cum with a loud call of his name, holding onto him for dear life as you spasm underneath him once again, tears falling from your eyes as you feel yourself in heaven for the fifth time. He keeps fucking you as you bite onto his shoulder in an attempt to muffle your sounds. Namor rocks his hips a few more times, his loudest grunt yet falling from his lips when he's filling you with his cum, giving a couple of hard, decisive thrusts to secure his cum inside you.

After a few seconds of entire bliss, you feel his fingers wiping your tears away before he once again makes sure to brush your hair away from your face. His eyes were looking down at you with such love, it was once again contrasting with the way he just fucked you. You run a hand up and down his arm affectionately in response, eagerly receiving his kiss when he leans down closer to you.

"You did so good for me," he praises you in a loving voice.

And as he continues to gently kiss your lips, cock still inside you and hands carefully roaming across your body, you once again could confirm that there is absolutely nothing in this world that could ever compare to this feeling. Absolutely no one could ever compare to Namor. You're entirely his, just like he's entirely at your mercy. You wouldn't have it any other way.

[husbandhoshi]

TO GROW LOVE (AND EAT IT TO THE CORE)

pairing: mingyu x gn!reader wc: 8.1k summary: your whole life, you've only wanted one thing. then you meet mingyu. suddenly you want too much, and you wish the summer never ended. notes: farmer!au, established relationship, angst/hurt/a little comfort

this is a birthday fic for my one and only cat @wuahae ! yes this is about half a year late but what can i say. all good things come with time. thank you for being so kind, funny, and thoughtful (and patient)! not a day goes by where i’m not thankful for our friendship :)

and a million thanks to hana @wqnwoos and jackie @97-liners for helping me with edits. literally you guys are insane writers and i will never stop looking up to you.

i. strawberries (the summer we were young)

When a strawberry is ripe, the seeds push out from the heart of the fruit, as if it's bursting from the inside out.

This is one of the few and only things you've learned by living in Seogwipo, where strawberry season comes like a supernova. The May sun, full and heavy, peels into summer, and the roadside farms open their doors, trying to catch stray vacationers from Jeju City on the other side of the island.

That being said, there are approximately two things to do here. One of them is farm. The other is pretend like you have a life, which is your childhood friend Yizhuo's favorite thing to do when she's back from university on summer break.

Today, this involved convincing her ritzy, too-good Seoul friends that they're missing out on this side of Jeju. (Missing out on what? You're not sure. Perhaps the chipped paint of the mural walls, or the endless flat-topped stretches of seagrass. Yizhuo isn't fooling anyone, but you've always liked stretching your legs out in the bed of her pick-up, even on the long drive to nowhere.)

Unsurprisingly, her friends quickly came to the same conclusion. Just one look at your local strawberry patch, with none of the glamour of the bloated tourist traps in the city, and they decided they'd rather spend the afternoon at the beach.

It was then, between the fragaria blooms, when you met Mingyu. He asked for your name, and the rest was history. Yizhuo and co. scattered like the grasping hands of an overripe dandelion and you learned that he was, one, the newly-graduated son of a pair of local farmers, and two, very, very attractive. Almost too much so, especially for a place like this.

Now he holds up a berry, a bright red murder between his fingers, and tells you to try it.

"You must be delusional if you think i'm taking food from a stranger," you laugh, perched on the fence bordering the field. It sprawls before you, melon stripes on the sunbaked ground.

"No, my name is Mingyu," he replies. "No idea who delusional is." His smile, all bright lip and snaggletooth, tears into the scarlet belly of a newly picked strawberry.

"We all know what happened to Persephone."

"Well, if the underworld was a strawberry patch, I wouldn't mind being stuck there for all of eternity."

"What're you picking all these for, anyway?" you ask, watching Mingyu struggle with his too-big straw hat between the vines. His woven basket bleeds over with little berries.

"Jam. I make it on the very first day of every summer."

"Why?"

"You ask a lot of questions for someone who trespassed on my farm. You're cute, but I won't let you off easy."

He laughs at how you balk, clearly red-handed. You're not sure how to tell him you don't think you were supposed to be here either. You don't do things like sit in the back of trucks, trespass, or talk to pretty farmer boys who take a fancy to you, but it's the summer before you graduate and you're not even sure how long you'll have to continue making bad decisions.

"Are you gonna take my first-born now?" you joke instead. The daylight runs down the rim of Mingyu's hat, trickles down his brow, and you wish you could pour the image of him into a jar and keep it forever.

"No, but I will invite you in for some fresh jam on toast. I baked a loaf this morning." and when you say nothing, he continues. "The strawberries are only good once a year. It's the best you'll ever have. Promise."

It's a whine and a half, and somehow you convince yourself this will be the last bad decision you'll make. You've been here long enough to know that good things don't come twice in Seogwipo, and he is unlikely to be an exception.

Yizhuo blows up your phone, you tie the gingham apron around Mingyu's tiny waist, and the basket turns to blood in the saucepan.

Mingyu is right. Love comes to you in that kitchen, high and red like the sun, and the jam never tastes as good as it does that summer.

ii. watermelon (hollowed out, like a magic trick)

"A good watermelon sounds like a heartbeat."

You watch Mingyu heave the fruit, small and striped, out of his grocery bag. It joins the array of egg sandwiches and banana milks you picked up from the store together earlier. (There should have been chocolate Pepero too, but you split the box on the walk).

You're on a picnic, sprawled out on the outcropping overlooking the water. The path up is basically right behind your house, but you had never cared to visit. It had always been the local makeout spot, a schlocky teen crawl for those with nothing better to do, and yet, with Mingyu stretched out beside you, it seems newer. More exciting.

You're still just friends, or at least that's what you told Yizhuo. But ever since you sat on Mingyu's kitchen counter and ate from his jam-covered spatula, you don't think you've gone a week without seeing him. It's been almost two months, which seems so long and yet not long enough—he makes it easy to be greedy.

"See?" He thumps the watermelon with the heel of his palm. "Try it."

You already went through this entire charade at the grocery store, right in front of all the local aunties, but you indulge him. There's little point to triple checking if it's still ripe, but you think he just likes hitting it.

"It sounds good," you say. "But how are we even gonna eat it? We don't have a knife."

"Watch this." Mingyu procures a coin from his pocket. "You didn't learn this in elementary school? I feel like everyone was doing it."

"Here?" you ask, incredulous.

"Yeah, here. I grew up here too, you know."

He holds the edge of the coin to the skin and slams his palm into it once more, so that it lodges itself into the rind, and begins dragging it around the fruit. You start to wonder if he bought the watermelon just to show you a party trick—not that you mind, though. The strain of his biceps peeks through his rolled up white tee, and you remember why he was able to stop you with just one look back when you first met.

"No way." The watermelon is so ripe, it bleeds around the incision. "I feel like I know everyone here. And I definitely would have remembered you."

"I was probably, like, two grades above you," he replies. "And my parents shipped me off to live with my cousins after elementary school. They said I should get out of Seogwipo and experience the real world."

"Good call. There's nothing here." You watch Mingyu spin the melon over to cut through the other side. The coin catches the sunlight, and it looks like gold. "I wish I left for university. The one here is so small."

"Really?" He pauses to show you his handiwork. The two melon halves roll over on their backs, their cut edge cruel and jagged. "Cool, huh?"

"Impressive," you say. "Honestly. I really didn't think that would work."

"I didn't either when I first saw someone do it. But I’ll try anything once," he replies, ripping open the packaging of the plastic spoon from the bag. "I can't believe you don't like it here."

"You do?"

"Yeah. A lot." He shoves the spoon in his mouth, and you watch the watermelon juice pool around his lips. "I missed home. The trees and the tall grass and the ocean. All the fruits. Everything. I learned to ride a bike, right down there by the water."

"Hm." He passes you the spoon. You don't want to hog it, so you carve out a piece bigger than you need. "Are you gonna work at the farm?"

"Maybe. Haven't decided yet," he says. "I think I want to be here, though. Maybe do something with food, but I want to be home."

"That's funny, because I think I’ve always wanted to live a different life. Or at least one somewhere else."

"You want to go to law school, right?"

"Yeah." Mingyu is right. The watermelon is all sugar, and you would almost feel guilty for eating it if it wasn't technically good for you. "I’ve always wanted to be a lawyer. It's something about the people watching, I think."

"That’s really cool," Mingyu says, mouth full but no less sincere. It's then that you notice your shoulders are almost touching, and your heart crawls back up to your mouth. "You know what you want. I admire that."

He makes it sound like a compliment, but you're sure it's a curse.

You think of your parents. There's a permanent wrinkle ironed into their foreheads, the paper crease of expectations and high standards. It's not that they didn't care, but their kind of care was a humbled sort, made heavy by a hard life. It didn't help that your big sister Seohyun went straight from Yonsei to work a big tech job in San Francisco and never once looked back.

But you can't blame any of them—wanting has always been a hereditary failing. Sometimes Yizhuo will catch you frowning at nothing, and then you remember that life isn't a performance and every day ends at the same time no matter how hard you work. But you don't know how to tell her that the only thing you can do sometimes is want, because otherwise you wouldn't really have much at all.

It seems like the exact opposite of how Mingyu lives—everything about him seems to pass like the seasons. Maybe that's why you can't seem to get enough of each other.

"Thank you. Really." You dig the spoon into your half of the melon. There isn't much left. "You're way too nice to me."

"It’s not hard to be," he laughs. "Maybe you're just too hard on yourself."

You're losing track of the distance between the two of you. You can almost feel the heat playing off his skin.

"Maybe."

It's then, under the veil of summer, where you meet Mingyu's gaze and, finally, things seem close to simple.

All you know are his eyes, heavy with sun, and then the slow, slow move of his lips against yours. He tastes like August, long and sweet, and for once you know what it's like to not only want, but to have, and to have again.

The ocean sings on the horizon, and the watermelon bellies weep.

iii. adzuki beans (or, the blood of a headless taiyaki)

Mingyu eats taiyaki headfirst because he says it hurts less.

"That makes no sense," you tell him, your pinkies linked. You never really liked holding hands, but yours fits so perfectly in Mingyu's and there's some girlish, childlike shine to it when you watch his finger search for yours after just a moment separated.

"What do you mean."

He breaks your gaze to eye a red bean taiyaki, like an unwilling predator sizing up their prey. It's the lamest, most embarrassing iteration of National Geographic you've ever seen, and yet you cannot find any fiber within yourself not deeply in love with the lion.

Fall is a forgiving place for your relationship to settle. You're now a senior at university and he's started his gap year. Gap implies he's in the middle of something, but in true Mingyu fashion, he leaves it up to fate, or chance, or something not nearly as kind (whim).

"Taiyaki isn't alive. And why would you want to pretend it is? Eating gummy bears would become an extinction event."

"It kind of is." He holds out the tail end of the taiyaki, the pastry almost explicitly flayed open, in front of you to eat. "Why does the Haribo bear have a face? Why do the gummy bears live in a gummy forest?"

"Great, so now I can’t even enjoy gummy bears without feeling like a serial killer?"

You dig your pointer into his shoulders, broad from all the time he spends on the farm. To think that his hands, big and weathered, were made to pick berries (and now wrap around your pinky finger) is bruising, if not ridiculously funny.

"It's a crime of passion. Gummy passion. Prosecute that."

He kisses your cheek and your heart almost squeezes into two.

The terrible thing about being with Mingyu is how seemingly endless his affection is. Now he's feeding you in public and buying the two of you matching socks (cat and dog, to be exact), although you'll admit it's a little charming, even if the neighbors do gossip.

He's sweet, too sweet, and his kisses stick to the back of your throat.

But you can't be fooled. There's an unsaid violence to the way Mingyu loves. (The meticulous spiral of the peel he carves when you ask for him to cut you an apple. The grind, decisive and cruel, of a knife against a cutting board. A pair of canines against your neck, your jaw.)

Even now, he bites the head off another unwitting taiyaki before stuffing it back in the bag.

"We're still splitsing, right?" he says, with perhaps 1% of his mouth available for speaking and the other 99% murder machine.

Splits, he always says before you share food. You never had the heart to tell him that it's in the same family as mines or sharesies or takebacks—silly childhood relics, ones that no one uses anymore because they don't mean anything.

This time, you don't hear him because you're thinking about the law school fair you went to before Mingyu picked you up. The future is so close, it scares you. A year from now, what ground would you be standing on? Would it smell like this—the peat, the thread-spool fields, the balm of the ocean? Would you still have Mingyu's finger wrapped round yours?

"Have you decided if you're staying at the farm?" you ask.

"Not really." He uses the back of his hand to wipe off his chin. "If my sister decides to take over, I’m actually kinda thinking of going to pastry school instead of getting a masters."

Mingyu had been toying with the idea for some time after you had talked about it on the outlook. It started off as a joke (September; a galette), then a what if (October; green tea mochi), and now it sits at a kinda.

"Kinda?"

The word gathers speed in the pachinko machine of your mind. You never liked being a kinda person. For Mingyu, it seems like a luxury of a word, but for you, it's really just another thing to hide behind. Kinda talented, kinda ambitious, kinda just there. You're always one foot in, one foot out of something better.

"Yeah, kinda. Why?"

"I dunno. What if we both end up leaving?"

"Maybe. You still want to, right?"

You would be lying if you said you didn't—it's what you always wanted. Seogwipo has been a sun-rot, too-small crutch for you, but you would also be lying if you said you weren't terrified that you'd eventually come back, limping like some doomed Icarus, unable to truly make it in the real world.

Then you think of the pockmarked farmland beside your home, lacy with the fall harvest. Even now, you can trace the endless blue of the coastline all the way there, cut through all the maybes and just let the sound of the ocean fold you into sleep like you were a child again. You wonder if Seohyun, all the way on the other side of the world, ever misses it.

"I’m not sure," you say, because, as much as you don't like it, it's the only answer you have.

"It's ok. You'll figure it out. You always do." He squeezes your cheeks together between his thumb and index, laughing at how they pillow out underneath his fingers. "Screw pastry school. I could come with you. Who else would keep you fed?"

Mingyu's complete and unfounded belief in you makes you feel something close to betrayal. How could he say any of that? With what proof? Only someone like Mingyu would be able to hold the wrinkled fruit of your unremarkable life between his palms and see something better than that. Maybe it's because he grew up on a farm. Either that, or he already cares for you too much, too painfully.

Secrets are easy to keep when they look like yours. At least here, in the pit of your stomach, you can keep count, take attendance of them, all your tittering, small anxieties. Some days it feels like your ribs are pressing out, but it's better than cutting everything loose to spill out over what little you do have control over.

You can handle a little pressure. You have to.

What concerns you is the hand Mingyu's got across your chest. With one look, he just might gut you. A twist of the heart-knife, and all those carefully wound insides carved out in an instant—maybe he'd pity you, but worse than that, he'd likely be disappointed.

For you, expectation has always stood taller than shame, and the idea that he sees something past you makes you want to run away.

"I could be a house husband," he says as easily as ever. "You'll be off saving the world, arguing with whoever, and I'll be there to run you a bath afterwards."

"Let's not get too ahead of ourselves," you reply, binding up the strange, hollow feeling in your stomach with a laugh.

There's a scared little girl hiding inside you, and whether Mingyu sees her or not hurts the same. A spade is a spade. You can only pretend so long.

You look at the taiyaki floating in their wax paper bag, blinded and wrought open by the same grin that now peels you down, and you're not hungry anymore.

iv. winter pears (rotten, outside your parents' house)

Mingyu's family loves Christmas.

You think it's because of the pear trees they have in the front yard. They stand bravely before the house, all emerald ash and wisdom in the December freeze. Run your palms over the knobs and it's like you can see into a sleepy visage of simpler days past. (Below its heart, carved: 1982, the year the farm was bought. Along the tangle of the roots: gyu waz here, in an unsure, childish scrawl.)  

Winter comes to the countryside crawling on its hands and knees. On days it doesn't snow, there's a mist, boggy and clingy. You've come to realize the cold is more of a threat than a promise, and so the pear trees still bear fruit; the silvery branches hang heavy, faithful.

The first day of December, Mingyu's parents had tasked the two of you with decorating the farmhouse, a duty you took very seriously. You wrapped Mingyu up in string lights and watched him blink in and out like your own personal firefly.

It wasn't until you watched the rafters, the barn doors, the joyous vault of the ceiling all glow, like a spectacular firework, that you finally started to understand why Mingyu was so into the holidays.

It was in the yellow blush of the string lights that you had your first pear from the tree, which Mingyu insisted was a holiday tradition. We make poached pears, he said, mid-bite. You simmer the pear in syrup until it gets so soft, you can cut into it with a fork. Just like butter.

That same night, he kissed you, mouth hot and trembling and tasting of honey, and pressed you against the bark so hard, you could feel the grit of its veins against your skin.

You think December became your favorite month, and pears your favorite fruit.

So much so, that for the entire month, you try to put away your worries about law school applications to celebrate with Mingyu and his family.

You learn his mom makes the best hot chocolate (a cinnamon stick and a dogged devotion to the whisk), and that Mingyu has no clue on God's green earth how to ice skate. (He careens right into your chest the first time. You spend the next hour with him attached to you like a backpack—he manages to find the most impractical ways to do anything, which you somehow admire the most). On Sundays, Yizhuo ditches her Seoul friends and instead accompanies you to the mall two towns over, where she watches you compare different ties and watches and collagen creams as you decide on gifts for his family. (Lilac is so last year, she'd say, stirring the straw of a watered-down milk tea.)

It's not until the weekend before Christmas when you realize just how serious things have gotten. Your feet understand the meander of the dirt path to the farmhouse, your bones the scent of the yellow-skinned apple, the faded wildflowers. Your palms crave the plush of the rug they have in front of the fireplace. Hell, you can't even eat soondubu without thinking of the kind Mingyu's dad makes, with extra anchovies and green onion.

You don't think about what this means. There are ten days left in December and love poured from a full cup never seems to run out.

"Please let me carry some of those," Mingyu wheedles. "Oh my god. I'm like the worst boyfriend in the world."

"No, you are not." you make your way up to his doorstep, taking care to one-two step over the stray roots of one of the pear trees. It's second nature to you by now. "The moment I hand you a box, you are gonna start trying to figure out what it is."

He harumphs and plucks the big one off the top anyway, the one he knows you can't reach. "I didn't even know you were getting us gifts. You didn't have to."

"It's the least I could do. Who shows up to a holiday dinner emptyhanded?" You stop at the front door. "And stop shaking it," you laugh, using the tip of your boot to nudge his shin.

"Okay. Okay," he says, saccharine, adoring, before grabbing the doorknob. "Ready? Are you nervous? You shouldn't be nervous, right? It's not fancy or anything, if you were worried about that."

And that's the thing that wedges itself between your ribs. Mingyu and his whole family are like this. They love and worry and love again; it presses deep into you, fills you, and overflows.

So here you are, standing in your nicest dress and balancing a stack of gifts you hope will amount to something, never enough but something, to repay the people who you feel have loved you more than you deserve. It's all you really have. You do your best, and yet you know when that door opens, it'll all be washed away in a high-tide flurry of hugs and laughter and the familiar press of Bobpul's wet nose against your leg. They're just those kinds of people—they would be just as happy if you didn't bring anything at all, and somehow that makes you feel even more guilty.

"No, no," you wave him off. "I’m fine. Excited."

When Mingyu opens the door, everything goes just as you expected. His sister takes your coat, your gifts are whisked away to the tree (Aji has already figured out which one is his), and his parents descend upon you in a choking swell of warmth and charity.

We baked some fresh bread for your parents (—Thank you so much, but you really shouldn't have.). You look so beautiful in that color (—No, no, you flatter me too much.). Mingyu better be taking good care of you (—He is. He really, really is.).

The kitchen is gauzy with cinnamon, anise. They must be making their famous poached pears, which Mingyu remarks on, just like clockwork.

Dinner passes the same way. It bubbles over with affection, and you feel swallowed by an impossible yearning. This—a full table and a hand to hold underneath it—did you deserve this? And could you keep it?

For an instant, you picture yourself, years later, at this same seat. Mingyu would be fussing over the rice cakes, his apron still gingham because it reminds him of the day you two met. His parents, grayer but no less happy, bickering over the shade of tinsel on the tree. And the dogs, coiled at your feet like they are now. The vision laps at your bones like you're a raft in a storm.

You're pulled back into the moment when Mingyu squeezes your hand, grounding and insistent. "Mom asked how school was going. I told her I think you're basically the smartest person I know, and I’m pretty sure you're getting into whatever law school you want."

Mingyu's parents laugh, and they cut through their pears.

"Oh, sorry," you say. "Um."

Clink. Knife meets flesh, meets porcelain. Your cheeks are hot. You wanted to talk about anything other than yourself tonight. Clink.

"The top programs are a reach, but it'd be nice." clink. "I just want to get in somewhere."

"They’re all so far away," Mingyu's mom remarks. "So grown up. Any school will be lucky to have you. You'll get into all of them."

Clink.

"Or maybe you can stay here." You watch the prongs of Mingyu's father's fork disappear into the pear. "Keep us old folk company."

"No, no, I think Mingyu should take notes and get off his lazy ass," his sister says, teasing. "Going back to the city will be good for him."

"So you can, what, burn down the kitchen again?" Mingyu grumbles, and the whole table seems to boil over with laughter.

"We’re kidding," his mom tells you. "No matter where you go, I’m sure you'll do great. We can even throw you a party at the end of the year. For graduating."

Clink. Clink.

There's a horrible uneasiness writhing around in your stomach. It's pear and syrup and clove and a blackness, an anxious, selfish one that sucks up all the generosity of the evening and turns it into shame.

Mingyu's mom is talking about throwing you a graduation party, something you didn't even think to do for yourself, and here you are, thinking about the shaking moment you open your rejection letters and the lonely path you'll draw on your way back home.

It's ok. They missed out, Mingyu would say, pouring you a consolation drink, and then it would be over. You'd go home and sit on your bed and the trifold piece of paper would go round and round your head like it was in a washing machine.

Your heart, an inventory of tasks and goals and tally marks. Things you've taken and things you've owed. It's a soft, boneless excuse. Be grateful. Give them that, at least.

Clink.

Dessert ends before you can tell his family not to get their hopes up. Mingyu's mom sends you off with your loaf of bread and a kiss on the cheek, and the moment is gone.

"Gyu," you call out on the steps in front of the house.

There are words at the seam of your lips. You want to tell him you're sorry for worrying so much. For making the whole dinner about you and then very possibly having nothing to show for it when it matters. For the heaviness in your chest. Your cowardice. But none of it comes out.

Instead you watch Mingyu pull at the leaves of a pear tree, watching the frost-filigree they get at the end of the season. He looks over his shoulder and smiles at you, as if he's on the hazy cover of a magazine. His eyes bend so wonderfully at the corners when he looks at you, and it breaks your heart.

"You had fun, right?" he asks. "My parents like you a lot, you know. I think they really do."

But that's the problem, you want to say. You all do, and I have no idea why.

Some of the pears are beginning to rot now. You watch one drop off the vine, and it caves to the pavement like it was made of nothing at all.

v. wild barley (grows like weeds)

In March, you play house.

Your parents leave on a two week trip to see relatives, and Mingyu takes it upon himself to make sure you survive.

It's a kind, blinding charade.

(7 am, breakfast. You usually don't even eat breakfast, but you wake up to doenjang and a smile, one that presses itself to yours until you're wearing it on the long walk to school.)

(4 pm, the stretch between lunch and dinner. You're muddling through another useless club meeting when Mingyu sends you a picture of him in your mom's apron, making kimchi. Kiss the chef, he texts you. You promise to, over and over and over.)

It's good until it isn't.

That isn't to say that it's Mingyu's fault. In fact, it's never really Mingyu's fault, and that's the worst thing about your relationship. Sometimes you wish he was worse just so there was someone else to blame.

(1 am, a fridge-cold glass of water and a hand on the column of your spine. Can't sleep? He asks. Just had a weird dream, you say.

It's a lie. You're a liar.

You miss your parents and the first wave of acceptance letters comes out in two days. You're not like him. Sleep has never been a cure for the exhaustion you're feeling, and you have no way of telling him that however warm the bed is won't fix that.)

It's on a Thursday afternoon when you open your mailbox and see the tiny, thin envelope that you've been expecting for the past week. You don't need to open it to know what it says, and yet you do it anyway.

The sun is white, a ghost in the spring sky. The ocean bleeds into the overcast, the curly barley stands tall around your feet, and you let the worst letter you've gotten in your life fall upon your shoulders, word by terrible word.

Then you close it, pinching the seam shut, and draw up your brave face. Nothing left to do but be brave. You're convinced you've used up all the sadness in your relationship—spend in pennies and the well still runs dry. Mingyu will cup your cheek and call you darling, pouring into your emptying basin, holey and broken.

You see him now through the kitchen window, Venus in his clamshell of a kitchen. Galbijjim day, he had said this morning. Now, he waves at you, glittery with recognition.

Your throat feels like crumpled paper.

Mingyu smiles at you, hazy through the glass. Your cheeks hurt and your mouth is paper mache, but you smile back anyway.

///

The letters come one after another.

You know what the envelopes hold and yet you keep opening them. The little folder you keep stashed in your bottom drawer gets fatter every passing day because you can't help but revisit your misery, almost as if you need to remind yourself it exists.

Mingyu is none the wiser. Today he decides he'll put off pastry school for one more year. "It doesn't feel like the right time," he says, rolling a log of burdock kimbap up. "You know what I mean?"

No, you don't. You never really do.

You do know, however, that it would feel really fucking bad that, come the end of the year, to have nothing. All your friends would be going somewhere—even Yizhuo opened her acceptance to an MFA program in Shanghai yesterday—and you would be here, still, feet firmly planted in the muddy Jeju dirt like they always had been.

"Hey, don't look so disappointed." he jokes. "Don't tell me you're already trying to get rid of me."

You're not, you really aren't. But part of you wonders if it's just a race to the bottom. If you got rid of him before he decided he wanted to get rid of you, maybe it would hurt a lot less. One less letter for the folder.

"Never. But imagine if you picked up a French accent at pastry school. Then I’d consider it. Maybe."

You watch his knife rock back and forth on the cutting board as he cuts the kimbap.

"Some for you. And more for me," he says, in what you can only describe as someone attempting to speak French when they've never heard it before. "Unless you want more, mon cherie."

He brings the plates to the table, his grin nothing short of dizzying.

"I’m irresistible, huh? Still wanna leave me now?"

"You're gonna have to try a little harder than that, I think."

The words roll off your tongue, easily, traitorously.

You watch the kimbap disappear off of Mingyu's plate.

Going, going, gone.

///

Seogwipo is always dark at night, only kept alive by the glow of the moonlit sea.

You can't sleep. Again. And so you sit out on the steps in front of your house, letting the twilight wrap around you like a blanket.

You got your last letter back earlier today. You held your breath and tore it open like you would a birthday card with money in it.

Waitlisted.

It was surely better than a rejection, but some naive, child-eyed part of you thought that if you had just closed your eyes and hoped hard enough, things would work out the way you had planned. Tragically, it wasn't enough this time. You wanted and wanted and you thought maybe that would mean you'd come close to deserving it.

Your parents called today. After managing to sideline the issue of basically the rest of your entire life, they had finally cut through your sad little charade. No good news yet, huh?

No, but—

It was always like that with you. No, but it's not as bad as you think. No, but give me a chance. No, but I’m trying. I've been trying.

You wish things didn't come out of you so complicated. That you could be like Seohyun, who could go through school with her eyes closed and still graduate at the top of her class. Instead, you parade around your little failures, trying to convince people it all could mean something only if they squinted. See? It isn't so bad.

You think you're past the point of crying about it. Your stomach hurts, you're cold, and most of all, you just want to go back to bed. Plus, although Mingyu sleeps like a log, you think he's developed a sixth sense for whenever you get up too early.

Time to be brave, you've been telling yourself, although you don't know who you're pretending for anymore.

So you nudge the front door open—it's so old, it wails if you come at it with any more force—and, to your surprise, see the light above the kitchen sink turned on.

It's not very bright, but it's enough to make out Mingyu's broad silhouette, back turned to you as he makes a cup of tea. He's humming one of his made-up songs.

"Mingyu?"

"There you are," he says, turning around. "Just came out to check on you. And make you some tea."

The kettle whizzes. Your gut twists.

You still haven't said anything to Mingyu. To manage your own disappointment was one thing—you don't think you could handle another person's. And yet when he stands there, Pororo mug between his huge hands, you feel as if you are holding a knife, big and guilty and bloody.

"I-I'm fine, Gyu. Honest." you watch his expression flicker, unreadable in the persimmon lamplight. "Sorry you had to come out. It's chilly out here."

"You know, you can tell me what's going on. I won't judge."

No, no, no. This is the last conversation you wanted to have, with the last person you wanted to have it with.

You feel feverish. You think your hands are shaking.

"Mingyu, I swear—"

"Whatever it is, we can fix it. I know we can."

That almost makes you want to laugh if you didn't want to cry so bad. Of fucking course he would say that. Mingyu, who treats life like it's the watermelon trick he showed you on the outlook, wants to put a bandaid on this whole thing, as if that could come close to fixing it.

He'd tell you to curl up on the couch with a bad movie while he orders takeout. Kiss you on the top of the head. It's ok, baby. Just another bad day for the person who has the worst luck in the world. Another lump of problems for him to try and make better. If he isn't sick of you now, he sure would be soon enough.

"It’s okay," you say, steeling your voice. "It really isn't a big deal. Let's just go back to sleep."

You try to walk away, but the hardness in Mingyu's eyes roots you down to the tile.

"Stop doing that."

"Doing what?"

"Pushing me away," he swallows. "Like you always do. I know something's going on."

"I’m not, i just—"

"You just what? You can't help it?"

"No, I—"

"Because you like to know that you can? That you can say whatever and then watch me come back?" A fragmented, heavy silence thrums between you. He's looking at you like he's daring you to say something, anything. His gaze is black. "What am I good for if you can't tell me anything?"

There's that familiar, stinging pressure behind your eyes. You think you're crying, but you're not sure. Maybe you've been crying this whole time.

"Fine," you bite. Your blood feels like hot metal. "You really wanna know? I didn't get into law school. There. Happy now?"

Mingyu looks stung.

"W-why didn't you tell me?"

Because I thought you would stop loving me. I thought you would have finally had enough.

"Because it's not all about you, Mingyu."

The words, selfish and damning, burn your tongue. Mingyu is right. This is what you always do. You fuck up and then make everyone else hurt for it.

"I'm sorry," Mingyu says. His voice doesn't sound like his. Instead, the words seem to hang in the air, trembling and holding their breath, waiting for an apology you can't give yet. "I shouldn't have—"

"It's ok." You swallow hard, and it hurts. "Let's just go back to bed."

It's getting colder and colder. You think there's a little hole in your sock, right above the cat's whiskers.

Mingyu doesn't reach for you as he passes to get to the hallway. Maybe he doesn't know how to anymore.

The Pororo cup is left abandoned on the counter. You walk over and read the label on the tea bag—barley, because you have class tomorrow morning.

You pick it up, let the ceramic buzz between your hands with whatever warmth it has left, and hold it to your lips.

It's cold now, but all you can think to do is drink it. Erase all the evidence that tonight ever happened, and maybe it'll be nothing more than a bad dream in the morning.

There's honey at the bottom of the cup. It sears the back of your throat, but you drink until there's nothing left.

vi. the peach blossoms (without fail, bloom every August. I miss you.)

You broke up the next day.

Even now, you remember what happened. You had woken up early that morning to make your own breakfast because you couldn't allow Mingyu to give you any more of himself. Your hands could only hold, shatter, so much.

"Mingyu, I think we should...." You looked at the zigzags of jam on your toast, angry and uneven. "I think we should stop seeing each other. For now," you had added, as if that made anything better at all.

Somehow that seemed more merciful at the time. Really, you think it just showed your cowardice. If you were going to break his heart, you might as well have gone all the way the first time.

Maybe it was a good thing that Mingyu saw right through you. He always did.

"So that's it, huh? You're just gonna give up on us?"

"No, I just...need some time."

"How long?" he asked. "Be honest with me. Because you know I’ll wait."

"I don't know." You couldn't meet his gaze. His eyes reached and reached over that kitchen table and you denied him even that.

"Don't you always know?" he asked, pitifully, desperately. "Don't you want this to work?"

And you did. In fact, you don't think you had ever wanted anything more, and it was that that scared you. You had already lost law school—you couldn't let the only other thing in your life let you go. So you pulled the trigger first.

"We should just end things. I'm sorry. I can't give you what you need."

He packed his bag within the hour, and you think everything, from then on, froze inside you. You didn't move from your seat until your parents came home from the airport later that day and asked why there were two plates of toast still on the table.

You think you knew, someplace, inevitably, this would happen. You, who only knew hunger, had reached deep inside Mingyu and rooted out a love you didn't think you were worthy of having. And yet you still ate from the vine, bite after guilty bite, until you couldn't take any more. The only time he asked you for anything at all, you couldn't give it to him—such was the irony of your relationship.

Maybe you were doomed the moment the first strawberry hit your tongue, just like you had said, all that time ago.

About a month later, you got another letter in the mail. Chungnam National University Law School, it read. This one was fat, in one of those brown envelopes lined with bubble wrap. Somehow, miraculously, that position on the waitlist had turned into an acceptance. You held the package to your chest and cried, loud and with abandon, as if taking a deep breath after almost drowning.

Ironically, the first person you wanted to tell was Mingyu. But the good news you needed to save your relationship came too little, too late. Perhaps that meant it had no legs to stand on in the first place, but that didn't stop you from missing it. Instead, you told Yizhuo, and she drove you to Jeju City and treated you to dinner. "You should just call him," she had said. "Hey, don't look at me like that. He'd probably pick up on the first ring."

The city is swathed in August's crimson summer—peach season. The narrow streets are lined with peach trees, the fruits glowing like fat drops of sunlight. All you do these days is plan for your eventual move to Daejeon and the start of a life that seems newer and shinier than your own. But surrounded by the cicada song, the velvet treeline, the rain-soaked asphalt, somehow you think you're going to miss Seogwipo more than you think.

(Fickle, fickle heart. You always needed things to be taken away to really be able to appreciate them. Somehow, all that wanting had boiled down to something more satisfying, more filling.)

You wonder how Mingyu is. Now that you think about it, he seems just as much a part of Seogwipo as the farm he lives on. It was only last summer when you had first met him in the field, set on fire by the strawberry harvest. You think about him now, peddling around that ridiculous wicker basket to make jam. Maybe talking to another pretty girl, someone as naive, cruel as you had been.

Not long ago, you considered calling him to apologize, but that'd just be another thing to be selfish about. A little time and some warm weather, and I’m calling to finally wash my hands of you. That's what it would sound like, no matter what you said. Still, it didn't stop you from thinking of him, every flower, every season.

"You know, I always wanted to grow peach trees. But I think we've always been a pear kind of family."

Mingyu. If a voice could cut through air, it'd be his.

You whip around, half-believing you're hearing things. Certainly that would be easier, but you're learning that there are some things you can't run from.

And like a picture, Mingyu stands tall, golden, framed by the peach blossoms. Not a thing about him has changed. Not even the way he looks at you.

"Mingyu," you breathe. Unfortunately, none of the times you replayed your last conversation with him help you come up with something to say, because in none of them did you anticipate him coming back. "W-what are you doing here?"

"I live here, silly."

"No way," you reply, scrambling. "Crazy, because I live here too."

You both laugh nervously, a silly, bubbly thing, but you feel like you're going to throw up. It's only now that you realize you're kind of on the walk to his place. Seogwipo has never had places to hide.

"I...um." You try and disentangle the guilt from the nostalgia from the scent of the peaches and the warmth on his face. They all look the same. You missed him. "I got into law school. In Daejeon."

"I heard," he says. "Not surprised at all. I always knew you would."

"Thank you. I mean it." The cicadas buzz around you, as if they know they have an important silence to fill. "You're staying in town, right?"

"Actually, I decided to apply to culinary school. It finally felt right, you know? I'm leaving at the end of the summer, but it's just in Jeju City. I couldn't leave the island."

"Thank goodness. I don't know if you could tell, but I kind of always hoped you would. I don't think I’ve ever eaten better food." Your voice wobbles, but it gets there. "You'll do amazing."

Then time stretches and forces you to recognize, reckon with, the moment you're in. You wonder if he feels the same way you do—bruised, overripe. If there's still a space in his heart for you.

Deep breath. Life only gives you so many chances.

"Mingyu, I’m sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't make us work. You deserved better." Saying it feels like peeling the skin of your heart back. There's still a palpable distance between the two of you—you think that had always been there—but it feels more comfortable in a way it never did before.

"Don’t apologize," he says, easily, as he always does. Everything seems to flow off him like water, and you think that's the part of him you loved the most because it was the one thing you couldn't touch. "We loved each other. I think that much was true."

A jasmine breeze curls through the trees, sending the blossoms fluttering around you like ink in water. The very first time you met Mingyu, you thought the image of him, haloed with the sunset, was the one you wanted to keep forever. And yet, somehow, you don't think you'll ever forget the way he looks right now.

"Will you ever come back to Seogwipo?" you ask.

"I was gonna ask you the same thing—you were always the one who wanted to get out of here." He grins, ear to ear. "Of course I'm coming back. There's nowhere I'd rather be."

"Yeah. I think I know what you mean."

The sea, the clay dirt, Mingyu. Even yourself, clumsy and care-worn. You think, somewhere along the line, you forgot how to love. But you're learning—one step at a time.

"Friends," you say. "Let's be friends. If you'll let me."

"Thought you would never ask. Gladly. Always." The space between you seizes, like it's holding in a breath. Maybe one day, you'll think of closing it once more, but you like where you stand now. You can admire him better from a distance, without your fingerprints all over him. He stuffs his hands in his pockets, something he does before he gets ready to leave. But before he does—"I'll see you soon, okay? You better come back. Promise me."

For the first time, you see the honesty in his eyes and you really, truly believe him.

"Promise."

The Seogwipo sun is high and red in the sky when you wave Mingyu goodbye. It feels like you're coming to an end of a long summer, but you're not afraid. You watch the wind dance through the peach blossoms, their branches never searching, never wanting, and you finally feel as if you've arrived home.

[flowery-mess]

Midnights of October🍁🧡🎃

October 24th

Friends with benefits with cop!Noah

summary: you and cop!Noah are friends with benefits, he sees you in his uniform at a halloween party and takes you back to his place

warnings: friends with benefits, smut; oral (f receiving), unprotected p in v (use protection irl), mention of handcuffs

words: 2.1k

author's note: this is literally copy and paste from my Ryan Tanner fic, which didn't get much love, because the fandom isn't popular on here, so I decided to slightly edit it and post it with Noah, because I like it. There's not really much about the actual job of police officer, but I'm open to write more for it if you want, let me know😊

taglist: @concreteangel92 @sorrowsofsilence @lma1986 @stardustsirenmelody @dream-machine-love @mrsnoahsebastian (let me know if you want to be tagged or deleted!😊)

Midnights of October masterlist

*

"What the fuck is she wearing?" Noah said with wide eyes when he saw you enter the bar.

31st October, Halloween party at your local bar, location you were both currently at.

You and Noah have been seeing each other since you moved to LA, which was 4 months ago. He needed to get over his ex, you over your ex. You introduced him to the phrase the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else. And that's exactly what you two did that night. That's also how you ended up getting under each other regularly and became what someone could call friends with benefits.

Noah is hot decent guy, and good in bed. You always end up at one of your places, have sex, eat food, talk and then one of you leaves. That somehow became an unspoken rule between the two of you, you don't cuddle, and you don’t spend the rest of the night together.

You never said it out loud, but sometimes you imagined what being more serious with Noah would be. He's nice, treats you right, cooks for you, treats other people right, he's a cop who protects people from the bad. He's an ideal guy for a relationship. But Noah never mentioned something like that, so you didn't either. You didn't have feelings for him, but you knew you liked spending time with him.

You knew he would be at this party, so you decided to be a little tease to spice things up tonight, because you knew you two would leave the bar together either way.

Last night Noah was on call and ended up leaving for work when you were at his place, but you left before he came back. You knew for a while that you're costume this year will be a cop, just to see if it does something to Noah. So you took the chance when you saw his spare work belt lying over the kitchen chair. You took things that would get you in trouble out of it. You also took one of Noah’s work shirts in the color blue and left.

Noah took few long steps in your direction and repeated his question, this time directly to you. "What the fuck are you wearing Y/N?"

"Hi there Noah." you smiled teasingly at him and put hands over your his belt.

Noah didn't put much effort in his costume, he was wearing coat with a hat, looking like he fell out of Peaky Blinders episode.

"We're leaving, now." he said through gritted teeth and took you by the elbow, dragging you through the crowd towards the door.

"We're talking about this when we get home, I can't talk right now, because I'm mad at you, you can't even imagine." home, that was all you heard, he said home. He was mad, but he also said home. And it didn't really mean anything because he was going home literally, but it made your heart flutter a bit.

When you two entered his home, he turned around and backed you until your back touched the front door.

"What the hell were you thinking? Stealing from a cop? Part of his uniform?"

You unclipped the belt and handed it to him, then you started unbuttoning his shirt.

"What are you doing?" he asked confused, anger still visible in his eyes.

"It's not stealing if you return it. Here." you put his shirt over the belt in his hands.

"You took my work shirt too?" he looked like he will jump out of his skin any second.

He was so mad that it took him few seconds to see what you were wearing under his shirt, black laced bra. When he connected his gaze with your chest, the anger in his eyes seemed to go away.

"You can write me up, officer Sebastian." you never role played with him and weren't planning on it tonight, you just teased him a bit more.

"Y/N I'm serious, you can't do that. It's dangerous." Noah said, more calm every second. You were too hot for him to be angry, standing in front of him like that.

"Okay, I'm sorry." you placed your hands on his shoulders, took off his coat and then pulled him closer to you.

You couldn't stop staring in each other’s eyes, in silence. He lowered his face to touch your forehead with his, while his nose was stroking yours, gently. He was always gentle with you.

"Kiss me." you whispered. And he did, because you were his soft spot and he'd do anything you asked for.

Slow little kisses turned into passionate kisses in a few seconds, as Noah’s hands were exploring your body as if it was the first time he was touching you.

He lowered his hands under your ass and picked you up, carrying you in the direction of his bedroom. You gently started undoing the buttons on his shirt, taking it off of his shoulders once you managed to open all of them.

Noah put you gently on his bed, his lips never leaving yours, while he hovered over you.

"Noah" you moaned his name as his fingers started moving from your chest to the band of your shorts.

"Mhm." Noah gave you his answer with lips on your neck, sucking at your sensitive skin.

He continued to move his fingers over the band of your shorts, putting them just a bit inside of the band for a few seconds, then pulling them out and moving them over the lace on your bra, teasing your nipples. Teasing. Punishing. For stealing his things.

"Noah, please."

"Please what, huh?" he lifted his face from your neck, with a smirk on his face.

"Stop teasing Noah, I said I'm sorry."

He took advantage of you lifting your hips, which was movement out of pure need for more fraction, and pulled your shorts down. And another second his lips were back on yours and his hand made its way back to your lower tummy, slowly dragging his fingers closer to where you wanted him the most.

He started rubbing your clit over the fabric and put his lips on your left nipple.

"Fuck." you moaned, he always knew how and where to touch you.

When his hand left your core your hips tried to follow his movement. But his hand was already on it's way to remove your bra.

"Hate to say it, but you looked hot as a cop." he threw your lacy bra away and put his fingers in use with your panties.

"You look hot as a cop all the time." you returned the compliment.

He used the hand in your panties to get rid of them and then he placed himself between your legs. He thrives from giving, he’s that good of a guy, so even though he was mad at you earlier, he wanted to pleasure you first. He continued kissing you for few more seconds, then he gently bit at your jaw before he made his way down your body. He hooked your legs over his shoulders while kissing the inside of your thigs. He looked up at you an met caught you watching him.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing, I just like looking at you." you whispered. And it was true, you liked looking at him a little too much than you should.

He continued kissing your thigh until his mouth met your core and your head fell back on the pillow.

Noah’s tongue kept circling around your clit while his hand held your hips down. You put your hand over his and couldn't stop the sounds that were leaving your mouth.

He did few licks from your hole back to your clit, he knew your weakness. He eased the pressure on your tummy with slightly lifting his hand as he flattened his tongue and let you move your hips the way you needed against his tongue. When he heard your breathing quicken, he held your hips still again and worked his tongue over your folds and swollen clit, collecting your juices while the feeling inside you was growing. When your orgasm took over you, your legs squeezed Noah’s head to make sure he doesn’t pull away too soon. You heard him chuckle against you, sending wave through your overstimulated body.

He kissed his way back to your mouth, where you could taste yourself. It was your turn to flatten your tongue as you held his head still and licked his mouth and chin clean.

"That was hot." he said barely above whisper.

"My turn." you said and tried to push him under you, but he sat on his knees and started unzip his jeans while muttering something that sounded like 'next time'. Before you could find out what Noah said he was already lining his hard dick at your entrance.

He slid his dick through your folds few times to collect your wetness and looked in your eyes, searching for confirmation which you gave him with taking his jaw in your hands and connecting your lips with his.

"Fuck baby." Noah let out in a pleasure after he slowly slid into you, lowering himself to his elbows to be close to you. He grabbed you by your chin and connected your lips for a hundredth time this night. He said baby, he said home. There probably wasn't any deeper meaning behind it, but he rarely used pet names for you.

His deep growl snaped you out of your thoughts. Noah’s head was in the crook of your neck, this position allowed you both moan straight into each other’s ears.

"Noah." you moaned his name once more as you felt the tension in your body to grow again. He set the pace as he continued to move his dick in and out of you. It felt different tonight, but you didn’t know if it was just for you, or if Noah felt it too. Sex with Noah was always intimate, but tonight felt even more.

Noah put his hand between your bodies to play with your clit, which wasn't really needed after he hit the right spot inside you that made your walls pulse around him. "I'm going to cum."

"Yeah baby, let go. Cum for me." and that was the last snap. You did come under Noah, tugging at his hair while being moaning mess.

Noah kept thrusting inside you, riding you through your high as he was still chasing his own.

"Y/N, fuck!" was the last thing you heard before he came too.

He collapsed on your chest, his head still in the crook of your neck.

“If you steal my things again, I’m putting you in handcuffs.” Noah said.

“Well, that sounds really terrifying.” You said with visible irony in your voice and made Noah laugh.

Your chests kept moving up and down, enjoying the moment in silence.

"Be mine." Noah said into your skin.

"What?" you tensed a bit, not sure what he meant.

"I don't want you to leave each time after we have sex, I don't want to pretend we're not close when we're in public. I don't want you to steal my clothes, I want you to wear it whenever you want. Be mine, please." Noah raised his head from your neck after he was finished to look into your eyes. “You don’t have to answer right now, or we don’t have to make it official right this second. But I want everyone to know we’re seeing each other, I want you Y/N.”

You slid your fingers through Noah’s hair, pushing them out of his eyes that were looking at you with so much hope. Then gently slid your hand to caress his cheek.

"Are you asking me all of this while your dick is still inside me?" was the only answer you could get out. You both started laughing, Noah got up to throw away the condom, then he put the covers over both of you and you laid on his chest.

"So, what do you say?" Noah started playing with your hair, you could sense he was nervous.

"I'm saying let's give it a chance then." you tried to hide your smile with putting your head under his neck, but he cupped your cheeks and made you look him in the eye.

"Really?"

"Really." that was all he needed to know, he kissed your forehead, then your cheeks, your chin, then finally your lips.

"We're going on a date tomorrow then. And you're staying tonight." Noah said between kisses.

For the first time ever you two took shower together, Noah gave you his t-shirt to sleep in. You fell asleep cuddled together, but you still heard Noah say "But don't steal my uniform again please." before he planted last kiss in your hair.