#note 2: i wasn't trying to be pretentious it's just that i first thought of it in spanish so that's how it most immediately comes to mind

[benkeibear]

『 You're a mean one Mr. Grinch 』

🎄synopsis: If you could use only two words to describe Sanemi during the holiday season it would be "the grinch". But just like his hairy, green friend, Sanemi does have a heart deep down - and it belongs entirely to you.

🎄character: Sanemi Shinazugawa

🎄reader: female

🎄cw: slightly suggestive for 2 sentences (It's Tengen, I can't help it), otherwise pure fluff

🎄notes: Merry Christmas @awkwardchick87 I am Tinsel the liddol elf for the @pixelcafe-network secret Santa! 🥹🫶 I hope you have a holly jolly season and that Mr. Grinch here shows up under your tree for real hehe. Also a big thank you to @hayatoseyepatch who helped me to make sure that Sanemi was in character!

Snow is falling all around us I fucking hate it, everything is slippery and shoveling snow sucks.

Children playing, having fun I hope they fall and bruise their tailbones.

It's the season, love and understanding you mean materialism and fake love…

The Christmas music was blasting from the kitchen and Sanemi couldn't help but scoff at the pretentious lyrics, adding his thoughts to each and every line.

If you only had two words to describe your husband during Christmas time, you wouldn't even need to ponder for a single second, the two words would come to your mind immediately - The Grinch.

“Nemi?” Your voice called from the kitchen as the songs switched, giving him exactly three seconds before the next one started playing, a moment of peace for his poor ears, he thought, as he slowly made his way to you.

“Can I turn the music down a little?” He asked as he rubbed his temples a little too dramatically, but your face said it all - he can turn the volume down but not entirely off.

Now that the music wasn't blasting through the entire house, the tense feeling seemed to disappear from his shoulders and he looked at you from across the kitchen island, cookie batter stuck on your cheek and flour coating your hair white and he couldn't stifle the smallest chuckle.

“Did you need my help, Mrs. Santa?” He asked teasingly, the flour in your hair aging you rapidly and you threw a freshly cut cookie at his face, the little star sticking perfectly to his forehead.

“You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch,” you quipped back and laughed at the way he ripped that star shaped cookie off his skin.

“What was that for?!” Sanemi sounded quite angry. “I mean… why did you do that?” He repeated his question much calmer, still working on his little outbursts that have become a lot less frequent.

“You called me Mrs. Santa! Do I look that old to you?” You asked amused and threatened to throw another cookie, this time it was shaped like a bell.

Sanemi walked around the counter and took a closer look at you with squinted eyes, studying you as if he really had to think about an answer, which made you puff your cheeks in feigned offense.

“Well… the flour does make you look like Mrs. Santa… But perhaps I just need to grow a beard to be your Santa then?” He asked and gently ruffled your hair in an effort to remove the flour, only making it worse, which did bring a smile to his face.

*plap* The bell shaped cookie got slapped against his cheek with a playful slap of your hand, making you laugh out loudly before running off, knowing he'd chase you to get back at you somehow - and you were right.

Sanemi chased you through the apartment, trying to throw the batter at your face but firing it against the wall and two windows instead before giving up and chasing after you without a makeshift cookie weapon. Neither of you knew how long you'd been at it, but when the smoke detector went off, you ran to the kitchen in an instant, the first batch of Christmas cookies looked more like the coal pieces that Santa leaves for the naughty children.

The next time Sanemi was painfully reminded that this is indeed Christmas season was when he walked into your living room and saw that tree standing there. What an ugly thing he thought to himself as he eyed it up and down - at least the shape was decent and better than the one from last year. With a sigh he went to the storage to get the ornaments ready for you, knowing that you'll want to put them on there sooner than later and he didn't want you to carry all these boxes… Just why did you have so much stuff for a tree??

The first note of the song came on as you decorated the tree and a shiver ran down his spine. He hated Christmas music, but this song was on top of the list of most hated songs - it just sounded so awfully nonconsensual.

Gripping the star that goes on top of the Christmas tree like a microphone, you dramatically got into stance to sing this duet he was sure you made him sing with you. You're so lucky that he loves you…

“I really can't stay,” you started to sing, but he refused to sound like some asshole, so he improvised his own lines.

“No problem, there's the door,” he grumbled and pointed at the door. Sanemi didn't even try to sing this, but he also didn't want to disappoint you - seeing you smile was what made him happy after all and if he had to embarrass himself like this, he would do so. Your smile was brighter than any Christmas star to him and singing a silly duet wasn't too bad after all.

“I've got to go away,” you continued and gave him the puppy eyes to act your part.

“I hear ya, say no more,” he mumbled and twirled you around once.

“This evening has been-” before you were able to finish it, he interrupted you.

“Totally consensual!” He butted in, which made you laugh at how he made his own version of this Christmas classic.

“My mother will start to worry,” you sang through your little giggle fit, already having missed a line, but Sanemi took a step back.

“Here's my phone, give her a call,” he chuckled, making the whole song sound a lot less creepy than it actually is. Both of you ended up laughing by the time the song was over, the Christmas tree only having one ornament hanging on its branches. Gently, Sanemi lifted you up to place the Christmas star on top before handing you various ornaments to decorate the tree, leaving this task entirely in your hands after you complained that he would clutter the tree. Granted, your first Christmas you almost shoved the ornament down his throat after he hung two red ones next to each other, but that is a story of the past…

The last time Sanemi was painfully reminded that it was Christmas Eve was when he sat under the tree like a pouting little child. His arms remained crossed as he waited for you to find him there - a red bow tied to a strand of his hair and if you looked closely, his cheeks were almost the same color from how embarrassed he felt to sit there. Both of you agreed to exchange your gifts on Christmas Eve already and while you got yours to put it under the tree for him, he went to get into position. Oh, how utterly stupid he felt and every second that passed only made him doubt his decisions more.

Sanemi never really celebrated Christmas before he got to know you. Holiday of love and giving… to love who? He had no family and it's not like he could do things like this with Genya. Giving gifts? He thought that was stupid, too materialistic. The white haired man was a firm believer that you should show your love to the right people every day of the year and not only on made-up holidays like Christmas or even Valentine's Day - but this changed once he found out that you're quite sentimental about those little things and that you don't expect anything expensive or lots of presents, just one small thing coming from his heart. So the first Christmas you two spent together, he gifted you his Haori - something too simple in his eyes, but you were so happy because you knew that this was his favorite. Unless it's in the laundry, you still wear it daily until this very day, well past your marriage vows, and you never fail to make his heart skip a beat whenever he sees you wearing it. But this time he had to outdo himself at least a little bit, so he went to none other than Tengen Uzui to ask for guidance. Did he hate every second of this? Very much so. It was almost humiliating to ask for help, yet he reminded himself of the purpose - you.

“That's just ridiculous!” Sanemi stood up, his head bright red at Tengen’s advice, who only shrugged with a smirk on his lips. A smirk that Sanemi wished to punch off his stupidly handsome face in that moment, but something started putting pieces together in his brain. If Tengen had three wives that adored him so much, his idea wouldn't be too bad, given he does it himself. Grumbling, Sanemi sat back down onto the tatami mats and Tengen's smirk grew into an excited one.

“I'm not going to wrap my dick with ribbon or stuff it into a box,” he exclaimed, knowing his friend's mind was running wild after he was the one suggesting these very things.

“Well, my wives do like to have a taste of my… candy cane… when I put a pretty bow on it,” he mused and Sanemi stood up once again, leaving this time. Too much information.

“Yeah, yeah, have fun, you pervert,” he mumbled and left the Uzui estate with a bright red head. Surely his best friend would have a better idea now that he and Mitsuri are together…

“I write poetry for her,” Obanai mumbled, his voice muffled and although he couldn't see him smile, his eyes were shining whenever he was talking of her.

“I can't… I'm not good with words or emotions and that shit,” Sanemi answered, deeply in thought. He could ask Obanai to write one for you, but it wouldn't be from heart. It would be the words of another man and just thinking about another man telling you how much he loves you made his blood boil - even if it's in his name.

“Just try it,” the short man encouraged him and swiftly moved to bring him paper and a pen to write before leaving him alone with his thoughts and a tea, surely he will think of something.

It's been two hours since Obanai checked in on his friend, so when he went to his living room to see how the poet is faring, Sanemi was long gone. The stack of papers was empty, crumpled up pages littered the room, which frustrated the Hashira. Next time they meet, he will have to face the consequences of trashing his estate - although reading these poems out loud to you should serve as enough punishment with how bad they were.

Just as he was about to stop reading them, as they made his skin crawl with how truly bad Sanemi was to express his words, one caught his attention. It surely wasn't a masterpiece, but for what it was, it was sweet and heartfelt. Obanai smiled to himself as he straightened the paper out, intending to send it to you in a secret letter.

“Roses are red, Violets are blue, With every wild wind, I'm thinking of you.

Your laughter's like thunder, In the quiet of night, A spark in my heart, You're my guiding light.

I'm rough around the edges, and my hair's a mess. You see through the storms and love me nonetheless.

So here's to our chaos, and the battles we face, In a world full of danger, you're my favorite place.”

Now Sanemi was sitting under the tree, a bow in his hair and a small box hiding in his pocket. While he went home, frustrated with the poetry session, his engagement ring caught his attention - it shimmered beautifully in the sun, just like your eyes. He made sure to choose a gem that came closest to his favorite color, and you wore an amethyst on yours to represent his eyes.

“The eyes are a window to the soul after all,” Sanemi whispered the words you told him on your first date when he looked everywhere but at you since you made him uncharacteristically nervous.

Although you've been together for all this time, the nerves crept up as he waited for you to return to the living room, hoping you'd like the necklace hiding in the small box, an amethyst placed neatly in the middle of a decorative piece that looked like a whirlwind. And perhaps you'll like the big present even more, as it sat there, waiting and pouting for your return…

Network: @pixelcafe-network

[honeyjars-sims]

Part 2 Prologue #1: Growth Mindset

Author's Note: I made some changes to my plans so the next few posts will be the prologue to Part 2 of Safe Harbor. They will fill in some gaps from the last chapter and set things up for the next chapter!

I’m preparing for my therapy appointment but this time instead of making the drive to Evergreen Harbor, I’m logging into our meeting on my PC. 

“So how are things going in San Sequoia?” Khadija asks me once we’re both settled in.

“It’s going great,” I tell her. It’s a little weird seeing her on the screen instead of in person, but before long our conversation feels as comfortable as ever.

“I’m glad to hear it! Is everything going okay with your roommate? I know you were a little apprehensive moving in with someone you don’t know that well.”

“Yeah, Paul’s pretty cool. I figured he would be, being Lucy’s brother and all. And everyone in the community has been welcoming.”

“So no secret cult activity?”

“Nope,” I laugh. “If anyone’s performing any rituals, they’re doing a good job of keeping it under wraps.” My impression of my neighbors so far has been that they’re mostly wannabe bohemians–they like the idea of a homesteading lifestyle but don’t want to fully commit to a life without modern luxuries. Pretentious, maybe, but not harmful.

“It sounds like you like it there.”

“I do. It’s different, but it’s fun. I’ve been helping out with the animals; you know, cleaning the chicken coop and milking the goat, stuff like that. I even helped hatch a chick!”

Khadija laughs. “I have to say, I never expected you to be out in the field doing labor.”

“I didn’t expect it either, but it’s not that bad. I guess I’ve been doing a lot of new stuff lately. Paul convinced me to join a yoga class and I think it’s helped me relax. And would you believe I’ve been doing cross-stitch?”

“Cross-stitch? I wouldn’t have pictured that either, but it sounds nice.”

“Yeah, it takes a lot of patience because I messed up a lot at first, but it's kind of relaxing in a way.”

“Relaxation seems to be a big focus for you right now.”

“I guess so. I’ve been trying to find new ways to regulate my emotions like you suggested. Honestly, I’m feeling really good right now.”

“I can tell. I’m really proud of your progress, Johnny. I can see you’re really putting in the work.”

“Yep, even when it comes to the hard stuff, like having to talk to Lacey, I’ve been able to work through my feelings and do what I need to.”

“Oh yeah, how did that go by the way?”

“It was okay. I just told her what I said to you, that I think she’s a really great person and I value her friendship, but I just don’t have romantic feelings for her. And I apologized for leading her on.”

“How did she take it?”

“Pretty well, I guess. I could tell she was disappointed, maybe even hurt, but she was cool about it. Work was a little awkward for a bit but I think we’ve worked past the worst of it.”

I'm glad that Lacey and I are still friends, but I do feel bad still about how everything went down with her. She's everything that I thought I wanted, but for some reason, it just wasn't clicking for me. The whole thing makes me more empathetic to what Lexie went through when she broke up with me; it really doesn't feel much better to be on the other side of things.

“Well, I’m proud of you for doing the right thing, even if it was difficult. I think it says a lot that you’re trusting your own feelings and not getting hung up on what you think you should do. I’d like to see you do that more often. How does that sound to you?”

“Good, but a little scary,” I answer. 

“A little fear is understandable as long as it’s not keeping you from growing. I think you can work through it, don’t you?”

“Yeah, I think so.” I wasn't sure I'd ever get to this place, but for once in my life, I actually feel like I can handle whatever's coming my way. And I can't wait to take it on.

Previous | Beginning of story | Beginning of chapter | Next

[infiniteinquiries]

♡ Coffee shop au in which ellie is a barista and knows you like her so she keeps making you increasingly terrible drinks to see how far she can push you ♡

pt. 2

-------

(pt. 1 here)

It had been a week since you'd graced The Wayfarer's Roastery. Ellie often thought it was a pretentious name, but here she was, working as a pretentious barista all the same.

It was the kind of set up you'd expect: white countertops and fake golden accents with a smattering of green succulents sprinkled in. You know, the kind of place you pay $8 for a cup of coffee because you're paying for "the vibe". Two comfortable seating areas that were always full, and minimalist back-pain inducing seating for everyone else.

She thought about you a few times that week, wondering if you'd perhaps leave a scathing review or just decide the shop was trash altogether and take your money elsewhere. But on the breaking dawn of a Sunday morning where Ellie was struggling to get through her opening shift, there you were.

You didn't stumble in this time. In fact, you looked quite composed. So put together in fact, Ellie wondered if your outfit and confident gait was some kind of ploy to impress her. Her cheek twitched in amusement, barely visible; you wouldn't have been the first.

"Mm," Ellie hummed in an almost sleepy tone, "back again I see. What can I do for ya?"

She watched as your eyes scanned the menu above her head. She tapped the countertop behind the register absent-mindedly.

"Could I get a Frappuccino? I know some places make those," you smiled, tilting your had sweetly. It was a bit much.

Ellie sneered, taking joy in the fact that she could put you in your place. "This isn't a Starbucks. Do you see a blender back here?" Her words dripped with condescension.

You looked at her, flustered and wide eyed. "Oh, I'm sorry I didn't know. Um...uh..." Ellie raised an eyebrow at you as you stammered embarassedly, glancing up at the line of customers forming behind you that signaled the start of the morning rush.

Ellie loved messing with women that tried to impress her. She took pride in the fact that she wasn't an easy catch, and being with her wasn't for the weak, especially with her fucked up sense of humor.

"Just...whatever you recommend," you blurted out in her direction. She took note of how your eyes avoided hers, veil of confidence gone.

"Alright then," she sighed, trying to tamp down the urge to laugh as best as possible, "that'll be $8.50".

Ellie's eyes tracked your hands as you dug into your jacket for your wallet. She zoned out as she thought about what monstrosity she could deliver to you next. She was grounded in reality once again when she heard the sound of coins scattering on the countertop.

She coughed to stifle a laugh, biting her lip to keep the sound from escaping. You looked panicked, and she decided that as much as she loved messing with girls like you, she didn't want to ruin your entire day.

Ellie began to calmly set the coins into her palm one at a time, a contrast to your frenzied gathering. Once she finished, she unclasped her fist full of change into your hands, held out pathetically like you were begging for something. The coins were warm as they left her grasp.

"I'll get on that right away," she smirked. A second barista approached the cash register to address the long line as Ellie scooted over to the prep area.

During your exploding wallet dilemma, she had come up with the perfect idea. Subtle enough to taste off, but not to the point she'd get in trouble for it. She whipped you up an iced London fog latte with a tiny dash of lemonade. Something about that combination just felt so wrong it amused her.

She approached the pick up counter, tempted to mispronounced your name but deciding against it.

As she noticed you still averting her gaze, she glanced out of the corner of her eye to see you sluggishly lift yourself from one of the only comfortable chairs and take your drink, mumbling an almost incoherent "thank you".

She giggled quietly to herself as she watched you quickly exit the shop into the cold air, briskly disappearing around the corner once again.

She wondered if you saw the small cheeky note she etched in sharpie under the logo of the roastery that read:

♡ Ellie

[thorongil82]

Total Drama: Destination Stardom

Fandom: Total Drama series

Chapter: 1/?

Chapter Word Count: Roughly 20,000 (yeah, you read that right)

Can also be read on AO3 and FFN

Summary:

30 competitors. 3 teams. $5 million dollars on the line.

Who of our returning cast members will walk away with a sizeable fortune? Will it be from Gen 1? Gen 2? Gen 3? Or one of the few from The Ridonculous Race? Will friendships be tested? Will anyone fall in love? Will any lovers bite the dust? And will Chris McLean stop asking all these pretentious questions?

Find out the answers to all of these, plus more twists and surprises here, on Total Drama: Destination Stardom!

----------

A/N:

Hey, all! I'm back! If you're new, nice to have you here.

This is my first Total Drama fic, though not the first one I've planned. Although, once I'd gone on a bit of a deep dive back through the series and fanworks, this one came to my mind. A mix of old ideas (from coming up to 6 years ago) with a blend of new ones.

Couple of short things to address before we kick off. Firstly, I haven't seen the reboot yet, so there's going to be very little reference to it. I am aware that they do address some timeline and there's some weirdness around that, but that'll be mentioned right out of the gate.

Secondly, I don't have things particularly set in stone just yet. I have an idea of when people will get eliminated, but things can be moved around depending on how I'm feeling at the point of writing and how things end up linking together. Why is this important? Well, it means that things aren't set in stone until they're posted, so there could be every chance for a surprise. If nothing else, I do aim to make it all work logically and make sense, so don't think I'm just going to pull some nonsense out of nowhere. It also means that there's no set schedule for uploads. I'll try to get things out as quickly as I can, but I make no promises.

Finally, because it does link in, I am more than happy for you to make suggestions or predictions or anything like that, whether that be for challenges, eliminations, commercials (yep, I'm writing those), alliances, relationships, etc. If I do end up using your idea (and it wasn't one I was already cooking up) then I'll be sure to extend credit where it's due.

Now, without further ado, let's get on with it!

----------

Chapter 1 - Wish Upon These Falling Stars

The camera opens up on a choppy mountainous island vaguely similar in look to those that have previously hosted Total Drama competitions, but not matching – a legally distinct island.

“After two successful seasons featuring a brand new cast, we at Total Drama knew that all you rabid, loyal fans would be starving for any glimpse of our former contestants."

From out of shot, one Chris McLean jumps into view, his iconic look having been maintained with no signs of Slowtox in sight.

“So we, meaning I,” he innocently points to his own chest, before bringing his hands together as his eyebrows furrow heavily, “thought what better time to bring back some of our former competitors – along with some new surprises – to duke it out for a massive cash prize.”

An image of a closed briefcase before a revolving golden background is shown as Chris' voice continues, “They will be competing for not one, not two, but …”

The briefcase opens, showing a massive amount of green notes that spill forth from the metallic confines, with some landing outside the briefcase.

“Five! Million! Dollars!”

An angelic chorus sounds out at the reveal, before the shot snaps back to the case in Chris' hands as he stands on a wooden dock, a couple of interns dressed in plaid crimson shirts crawling at his feet to retrieve the fallen notes.

“Who will snap under the stress?” Chris asks, dropping the heavy case onto one of the interns with a solid thud as the host flexes. “Will friendships be shattered?”

Straightening back up, he reaches down off camera to retrieve the now closed briefcase, holding it up as the priceless prize that it is.

“And who is willing to risk it all for what could be their last shot at fame and fortune?”

The intern initially crushed by the heavy cash-filled briefcase shakily limps back up into shot before Chris drops the briefcase on top of them again, both disappearing off-screen as the host points to the camera.

“Well, you'd better stay tuned to find out here, on …”

The image jolts back to a view of Chris standing on the dock with arms wide open, one intern crushed under the briefcase while the other is slowly crawling to pick up the remaining fallen notes.

“Total!”

The image jolts back even further, showing a more zoomed out view of the dock and the island beyond.

“Drama!”

The final shot jumps out to the initial view of the entire island from afar as before.

“Destination Stardom!”

----------

Opening Sequence

Two production lights swing into shot in two quick cuts, before a third cut as a camera pops up from a hole in the ground. A fourth and final cut shows a second camera shooting out of a tree burrow with the edges of a bird's nest poking out, startling the two squirrels chittering on the branch and pushing out a three-eyed blue bird from its nest.

A clapboard snaps shut as the view changes to a wide shot of the main camp area; including the main lodge and the three cabins. One of the cabins looks just like the old musty rickety shacks of Wawanakwa past, the second is a rather beautifully crafted log cabin, while the third is far more luxurious akin to the reward cabin from All-Stars.

“Dear Mom and Dad I'm doing fine,”

The view quickly darts through the campground, catching Chris sitting on the top floor balcony reading a newspaper with a mug of coffee in his hand.

“You guys are on my mind.”

Zipping away from the facilities, a sky shot shoots up the sharp forested rise before panning round and plunging down the cliff, catching three rings set up in floats of green, yellow and red respectively in the lake below before diving beneath the water.

“You asked me what I wanted to be,”

In a rush of bubbles, the view shows Scott swimming off to the right before freezing up and letting out a silent scream as a rush of bubbles billows out. The dirt farmer quickly scampers to the top left of screen as the mutated shark Fang chases after him with a toothy grin.

“and now I think the answer is plain to see,”

Surfacing, Shawn and Jasmine are paddling a canoe out on the lake when Scott jostles their craft in his panicked swim. With Fang's arrival swiftly afterwards, Shawn jumps back while Jasmine stands up and smacks the mutant shark away with her oar. Both their sudden movements help further unbalance the canoe as it capsizes, taking the couple with it.

“I wanna be famous!”

As they tumble into the lake, B zooms by overhead wearing his own makeshift jetpack. As the silent genius rises up into the clear sky, some sort of projectile slams into him and makes him careen into the ground with a big rumble. He pushes up from his wreck and glares over at the smirking Scarlett, standing besides her own launching contraption looking a little like a small trebuchet tapping a wrench against her crossed arms.

“I wanna live close to the sun,”

The shot shifts away to Amy and Sammy riding in an inflatable raft down a river, being carried along by the water flow. The evil twin is facing away from the current yelling at Sammy through a megaphone as the nice twin looks quite resigned as she paddles them along as well. Neither cheerleader notices the waterfall coming up until too late as they tumble over the top.

“Go pack your bags, 'cause I've already won.”

Underneath, Alejandro walks across a thick log spanning the length of the valley as he glances up, before reaching out and catching the falling twins. Amy squeals and snuggles up to the Latino, before kicking Sammy out of his other hand, the nice twin barely managing to cling to the log.

“Everything to prove, nothing in my way,”

From out of shot, Sierra comes swinging by on a vine, one hand up to her forehead as she searches round in the opposite direction she's swinging before suddenly slamming into the outhouse confessional, causing Cody to spill out. Cody dusts himself off before looking back in horror as the giggling Sierra staggers round the outhouse, before dashing off as the super-fan stalker chases after him with arms stretched out ready to grab him up, the two running past the main lodge.

“I'll get there one day.”

The camera slides in through the dining hall window, showing DJ at the stove looking extremely pleased as he takes a deep whiff of the soup he's brewed, only to flinch back as Chef barrels his brew off the hob with his own gurgling sickly broth, glancing back at Cameron, Jay and Mickey all sat in the dining hall. Cameron flinches while the Adversity Twins seize up, Mickey falling off his seat from his shuddering.

“'Cause, I wanna be famous!”

Next to the scrawny horrified boys, Eva and Jo are using the dining bench to arm wrestle one another, with Noah glancing up from his book monitoring the bout. Both competitive women quickly throw their other hands into the fray, still unable to win the match as they push with all their might. Both Jo and Eva grit their teeth and growl at one another, while Noah's eyes widen as he glances between the two.

“Na na na na na na, na na na na na, na na na na!”

Coming out of the dining area, Jacques is laying down on the sand sunbathing before Lightning runs into shot ahead of Sky. The two run over the Olympian before Sky vaults up onto Lightning's shoulders and flips forwards, gaining the lead while Lightning looks wide eyed. Jacques glares at the two.

A hand reaches over and drags the camera over to show Dakota as she gives the lens a kiss, smearing her lipstick as she does. The cameraman wipes the lens down as Dakota steps back, leaving her to pose again and again with Jen and Justin, Jen in the middle of the two.

“I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous!"

With each “I wanna be”, a vengeful Sugar dumps a bucket of rotten fish onto Dakota and Justin respectively. As the two models cower in anguish, Jen is spared from the third bucket as an umbrella pops up to shield her from the sickening mixture, with Brick having jumped in to protect her.

“I wanna be, I wanna be,”

The fashionista smiles and grabs the umbrella, holding it aloft and twirling before she leans up against the now blushing cadet, one arm rubbing the back of his neck as he gives a sheepish smile. Jen tosses the umbrella up into the air as the camera follows, catching it flipping round following the shape of the sun before the blue sky fades to night in time with the umbrella falling, a full moon taking the place of the sun in the sky.

“I wanna be famous!”

As day falls to night, the glowing embers of the campfire float up as the camera pans down to Duncan on the left of screen, Courtney and Gwen on the right, and Dawn placed between. All bar Dawn glares at the other side as the moonchild's turns between the three, placing her hand on Duncan's shoulder. Suddenly Chris jumps up between the four with arms raised and a massive toothy smile, while the other contestants sit round the fire whistling the end of the tune.

----------

The camera cuts back to Chris standing on the docks, with no sign of the interns or the cash prize in sight.

“Welcome back to Total Drama Destination Stardom! Set here, on the Starfall Archipelago,” Chris states, holding his arms wide open. “It contains the usual commodities of old; same disgusting cabins ...”

The interior of one of the cabins is shown, showing off the rickety wooden floor, the scratchy rough sheets atop the wobbly bunk beds, stains on the windows at the far end, and cobwebs spun in the corners of the room. As a mouse crawls across the floor, Chris continues to speak off off-screen.

“Same reeking outhouse confessional …”

The view cuts to the familiar confines of the outhouse confessional, with the mouldy seat top flipped open and flies hovering around the disgustingly visible green odour emanating from the loo. The view suddenly blurs as a purple haze is all that's caught by the opening door, before revealing a sasquatchanakwa crammed into the confessional moving to sit down on the toilet and opening up a newspaper.

“Same ruthless wildlife.”

The sasquatchanakwa is now shown walking across the campground, a rolled up newspaper tucked in under its arm and a takeaway cup of coffee in its hand. The camera pans with it, till Chris comes back into shot. The camera on Chris, while the sasquatchanakwa keeps walking away.

“Plus a few new surprises.”

A loud bellowing roar sounds out in the background, shaking the camera and seemingly the very island itself. Chris glances over his shoulder and laughs, before turning back to the camera.

“Got them shipped in special,” the host points his thumb over his shoulder with a chuckle, before clapping his hands together. “But, more on that later. I'm sure you all just want to see who will be competing for our grand prize.”

Chris walks back out onto the docks, moving up to the edge.

“Well, as the old saying goes, 'age before beauty'. So without further ado, let's introduce our first generation victi- I mean, campers.”

As Chris chuckles, a white boat sails by the docks, stopping ever so briefly as a couple of grunts are heard off shot, with the camera focusing in on Chris' celebrity mug.

“First up, giant animal lover and full-time momma's boy, it's DJ!”

DJ picks himself up and walks up to Chris. While he's still dressed in an outfit nearly identical to the one he's known on the show for, DJ himself has gotten a bit bigger. His muscular bulk fills out his shirt even more, while his skull-cap has gone in favour for showing off the tuft of hair curling round the top of his head.

“Hey, man, did we really need to be thrown off the boat?” he asks, rubbing his back.

“Did you really need to ask that?”

DJ slumps a little at that. “I guess not.”

Chris smiles and looks beyond DJ. “Next up, the perennial snarker and lousiest assistant in showbiz, it's Noah!”

The snarker in question comes into view, not only with his iconic outfit but also not really showing any signs that the years have physically changed him.

“Nice to see your material's as outdated as your films, McLean,” he quips as he walks on by, getting a glare from the host.

[Outhouse Confessional – Noah]

“Seriously? I only took that dumb job to try and get an entry into the business,” Noah grumbles, throwing his hands up in exasperation. “That maniac is easily the worst boss I've ever had to work for.”

The snarker sighs as he slumps back in the confessional, before giving a deadpan look to the camera.

“I'd rather take a deal with the devil.”

[Confessional Ends]

“Next, looking to strike gold after crashing and burning in just one season, it's Eva!”

Eva stomps across the dock completely straight faced and radiating her intensity, making the softhearted DJ shrink back while Noah just raises an eyebrow. Appearance-wise, other than her gained muscular bulk, Eva's ponytail has gone as the stunt woman now opts for a spiky pixie cut.

“Well, Eva, what do you think? Think you'll make it any further this time round without us bringing you back?”

DJ lets out a little whimper and shrinks back even further. Eva just gives a small grunt and walks by Chris without giving him an answer.

“Ooo-kay …” Chris stretches out awkwardly before recomposing himself. “Anyway, here's our next competitor! Our first season runner-up, and stealer of boyfriends, it's Gwen!”

Similarly to Eva, the goth stomps her way across the dock up to Chris. In the few years that have passed, Gwen has grown her multi-coloured hair out letting it brush past her shoulders with a slight wave. In addition, she now has on a couple of striped arm sleeves matching her colour scheme that cover most of her forearms, along with a dark moss green skirt that sits over her shorts, the back studded belt holding it up sitting at a slant.

“Is that really all you have, Chris?” she presses, getting a shrug back.

“Pretty much.”

“Fine. Whatever,” she huffs as she stomps off. “If it wasn't for this stupid contract, I wouldn't even be here.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Gwen]

“Seriously?!” Gwen growls as she kicks the side of the outhouse. “Four seasons on this life sucking show and that's still all I'm known for?! I'm not even dating Duncan anymore!”

She puts her head in her hands and draws out a long sigh, before finally looking back up.

“At least he managed to mention me being a runner-up …”

[Confessional Ends]

Chris watches her stomp off with a smirk. “And speaking of contracts …”

Gwen comes to a sudden stop as her eyes go wide. “Oh no!”

“A former CIT with a gaggle of bloodsucking lawyers at her beck and call, welcome back Courtney!”

Courtney steps up to Chris with her arms crossed as the boat she arrives in sails off. Her beautiful brown hair has grown longer, similar in length to Gwen's, though hers is completely straight. In addition, a rather expensive looking watch adorns her left wrist, along with a pearl-like ball earring poking through her locks.

“No loopholes in our contracts for you to try and weasel your way out of, McLean?”

“You know, you'd think a law school graduate would actually read what she's given before signing it, right?” Chris jabs back, getting a huff from Courntey.

“Hmph! Well, if there is anything wrong-”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, lawsuit, lawyers, yada yada, we get the drill,” Chris cuts her off, pointing over towards the other arrivals. “Go stand with the others.”

Courtney's eyes narrow as she walks by Chris and gives the already arrived campers a once over – giving what actually seems like a genuine smile to DJ and getting one in return – before freezing up as she notices the goth.

“G-Gwen … h-hi …” stammers Courtney before trailing off.

“Courtney …” Gwen tries to start before she too falls silent, rubbing her arm.

[Outhouse Confessional – Courtney]

Courntey lets out a loud groan as she rubs her temples. “Why? I just wanted one last shot to try and repair my standing. Why did Gwen have to be here?”

There's a slight pause as Courtney keeps massaging her temples, before throwing her arms up in the air.

“Oh, who am I kidding? Of course Gwen would be here. It's Chris.” A pause. “Why does this have to be so hard?”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional - Gwen]

“Oh god, this is awkward …” Gwen groans with her head in her hand. “At least it's not Duncan.”

[Confessional Ends]

Courtney takes her place amongst the currently gathered original cast, taking a spot as far away from Gwen as she can.

“Hmm … seems a little tense, eh? Well, why don't we fix that?” chuckles Chris as he rubs his hands together. “Quite possibly the most conniving competitor in Total Drama history, yet only the runner-up in World Tour, it's Alejandro!”

“What?!” exclaims all four campers.

The handsome Latino gracefully slides off the boat railing onto the dock below, giving a smirk and a raised eyebrow at the group. Not too much has physically changed about the devious Spaniard, although a rugged five o'clock shadow accompanies his well groomed soul patch. The top of his locks have been pulled back and tied into a man bun, while the base of his hair hangs free.

[Outhouse Confessional – Alejandro]

“Twice this hellish show has managed to disgrace the honour of myself and the vaunted Burromuerto name,” Alejandro states, one knee drawn up so his stylish boot rests on the wooden platform. “Three times if you include the shameful display put in by my brother José during his little cameo. This is a travesty – one that must be righted.”

[Confessional Ends]

“Hola, mi amigos. It has been far too long,” Alejandro waves as he walks up to them. “Especially for the hermosas flores.”

“The what?” asks DJ.

Alejandro winks at the three female competitors as he replies, “The beautiful flowers.”

Both Courtney and Gwen's eyes narrow as they look at him, though they do also carry the faint fluster of a blush on their cheeks. Eva, on the other hand, looks quite transfixed.

[Outhouse Confessional – Gwen]

“I know. I know! He's-”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Courtney]

“-a snake! It means nothing!” Courtney closes her eyes and turns her head away with a look of indignation. However, after a pause, her eyes open back up. “But-”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Gwen]

“-why does it have to feel-”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Courtney]

“-so intoxicating?” She giggles, before freezing up and smacking her cheek hard. “No!”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional]

“I mean, why would anyone ever want to kiss the lips that have been kissing Heather?” Gwen finishes with a smirk before pretending to gag.

[Confessional Ends]

“You know, I wasn't sure where I was going to find a greased eel for my new unadon recipe, but now …” Noah decides to speak up with his signature level of sass.

“Ah, Noah, I see getting a free meal ticket into society still couldn't improve your manners,” Alejandro shoots back, seemingly unfazed by Noah's obvious dig.

“Well, you know what they say. You can't teach a dead donkey new tricks.”

That one, however, got under the Latino's skin as his eyes narrow, shooting daggers at the snarker who simply smirks back before getting a nudge from DJ

“Meal ticket?”

“Don't worry about it,” Noah shrugs him off and looks the other way, only to see Eva still in a bit of a daze. “What's with you?”

[Outhouse Confessional – Eva]

“Soooooo dreamy …” Eva swoons with a dreamy expression, before jerking upright and – like Courtney – hitting herself to snap herself out of it. However, instead of a slap, it's a full on punch.

“No! The girls at the gym already rubbed my face in for letting Justin talk me out of all that money back in season one. No pretty boy is going to make me lose focus again.

[Confessional Ends]

Eva catches Noah's look at her before rapidly shaking her head to clear it as Alejandro takes his place amongst the arrivals.

“Well, seeing as how one handsome devil seemed to turn the heat up to eleven, let's see what bringing in a second will do,” Chris continues on. “The supermodel with hypnotic good looks and a twelve-pack to match, it's Justin!”

Justin rides in on the front deck of the boat as it speeds in, the sun shines from behind, birds fly overhead, and the model gets a glint that sparkles from his pearly white teeth as his signature music plays behind him. He has managed to maintain his undeniable good looks despite the many physical traumas he has undergone during previous seasons – particularly Action.

[Outhouse Confessional – Eva]

The confessional camera shows no-one inside. However, a loud cacophony of destruction sounds out off-screen and the outhouse shakes, all while Eva can be heard screaming and raging.

[Confessional ends]

Justin walks across the dock in front of a grinning Chris, before he gestures to another boat coming in.

“And rounding out our heart seekers, he placed third in World Tour and thinks himself a casanova ,” Chris emphasises this with air-quotes, before following with a mocking laugh, “let's welcome back Cody!”

The boat comes to a stop at the dock as Cody walks down the path, wearing a puzzled expression. He has undergone the greatest transformation of any cast member introduced so far, having undergone quite the growth spurt. He now stands around the same height as Alejandro – perhaps even being slightly taller – while his skinny frame has bulked out to a more lean build, filling out his clothes. His hair has also grown a bit thicker, while he maintains a small bit of scruff on his chin.

“Hey, what do you mean 'thinks'?”

Cody spares a glance at Chef who nonchalantly walks past towards the boat, before looking back as a few poorly contained snickers can be heard from various sources – a quick look showing them coming from Justin, Alejandro and Courtney.

“You're kidding, right?” the host asks.

Cody sighs and scuffs the dock a little with his foot as he walks up to the others, picking himself up a little on the way to put back on his 'charming bravado'.

“Hey guys,” he says, shooting finger-guns at the group. Eva rolls her eyes at his act, though he doesn't notice. Instead, his eyes widen a little and his smile gets bigger as he notices the goth already in the group. “Hi, Gwen.”

Gwen winces a little as she gives a little finger wave before rubbing her arm. “Cody, heeeey … What brings you back?”

“Honestly, I still feel like I need to make my mark. Even in finishing third, I don't feel like I deserved to be there. I want to prove myself, even if it's just to myself.”

There's a slight beat as several look surprised by his answer.

“Huh, that's actually pretty mature of you.” Gwen notes.

“Plus, I really needed to get away from Sierra,” he adds on. “I've gone through five different phone numbers and thirteen new email addresses. My family even moved to a different province. She still kept finding me. At this rate, I may need to change my name.”

Noah and DJ share a look.

“And in wanting to get away from Sierra …” DJ starts.

“You thought this would get you that freedom?” Noah finishes.

“Yeah, kinda. At least until this episode airs. Why?”

Cody barely finishes asking the question before a harsh squeal comes out of shot and Cody is tackled to the ground, somehow skidding across the dock as Sierra grips onto him tightly. Her appearance hasn't changed much, though where she had one long braid she now has two. Her hair is also a little frayed with strands coming out in various spots, while if you look carefully you could maybe see the slight markings suggesting a tattoo on her back covered up by her shirt.

“Ah! Ah! Codykins!” Sierra giggles madly, nuzzling her head up against his. “It's been so long and so lonely but now we can finally be together properly after all this time!”

“Oh, I don't know ...” deadpans Noah.

“Nooooooooooooooooo!” Cody flails around in her grip. “Why?!”

“Sure, Sierra, ruin my intro, why don't you?” Chris huffs as he watches on, before catching Chef walk back from the ship. “Weren't you supposed to keep her contained till the cue?”

[Outhouse Confessional – Chef]

“I've dealt with enough of the crazies thanks to Izzy to know that there ain't no way anything was gonna stop that creep,” Chef notes, tapping a finger up against his tree trunk arms. “Sierra'd already woken up early from the tranquilliser, broke outta her chains, and busted open three of the four safes she'd been locked in by the time I got to the hold.”

He pauses, looking off to the side before adding on, “I almost feel sorry for that kid.”

[Confessional Ends]

“Well, whatever, super-crazy superfan fandom fanatic, Sierra everybody.”

Sierra is still pinning down Cody underneath him completely unfazed by Chris' lacklustre introduction for her, while everyone else watches on uncomfortably.

DJ is the first to speak up as he asks the others, “Should we help him?”

“Do you want to get rabies?” Courtney whispers back.

DJ lets out a little whimper as Sierra finally stands up, holding a struggling Cody tight against her while everyone else scoots a little away from the 'couple'.

“Anywho, our final member from our original cast, give it up for …” Chris trails off as he notices that the boat he was expecting to have arrived already is nowhere to be seen. “Seriously? Is it too much to ask for my intros to go as they should?”

A ringtone calls out as the host pulls out a phone from his shorts with a click.

“Yeah? Hey. You know we're on a schedule, right? Fiiiine …”

Chris tosses his phone away in a strop before spinning back round to face the original cast.

“Well, looks like someone's being troublesome,” he explains, before glancing at a watch on his wrist, “and the timing for the next gen was set to their arrival … So, guess it's time for a commercial break! You've seen the first gen slackers we've had to pluck back from obscurity.”

“Hey,” Courtney shouts back to no reaction from Chris as he continues on.

“Has this season's winner already appeared? Who else will join this hopeless lot? Find out when we return after this break!”

----------

Commercial Break

“Are you tired of being ignored by the one you want?”

A female voice plays over footage of a pimply teen girl waving at a jock in a school hallway, only for the jock to completely ignore her. Her lip quivers as she sags up against the line of lockers.

“Do you want to be the one they all drool over?”

A new scene comes in of an adult standing at a bar, absentmindedly stirring her drink as she watches a handsome hunk chat up a younger woman wearing rather revealing clothing.

“Does your body sabotage you with its icky smell?”

A third scene plays as a panting woman in a heavy sweat stained tracksuit takes a smell of her armpits before gagging and passing out. A voluptuous woman clad in a form-hugging blue cocktail dress steps over the fallen lady and points to the camera.

“Then you need Desperado; The Fragrance of Last Resort!”

A close up of the fragrance bottle is shown, crafted to look like the drumstick of a roast chicken.

“Our company utilised the same cutting edge research shopping centres found to attract customers to their stores and bottled it ready for you.”

A scene plays of the teen spritzing herself with the fragrance as the jock walks by her again; though this time he does stop. Sniffing the air, he turns around and comes face-to-face with her with a wide smile.

“Let the irresistible smell of roast chicken do the work for you.”

The teen girl winks at the camera as the object of her affection leans in with hearts in his eyes and a small line of drool leaving his mouth. The image dissolves back to a close-up of the bottle.

“Desperado can be found in all good stores. Or you can go to our website and order from there.”

It zooms back to show the bottle being held by the voluptuous model, still standing over the fallen – and now twitching – third woman.

“Desperado! Just one spritz and he'll be finger licken' smitten!”

She sprays the lens in a cloud of fragrance, the cloud parting away as clips of Beth feeding the liquid fragrance to Owen in Total Drama Action is played with a big red X over the top.

“Warning; Desperado is not meant for consumption. We are not liable for any poisoning caused by ingestion. Please report to a hospital if you have any health problems.”

----------

“Welcome back to Total Drama: Destination Stardom!” Chris says, still on the docks with the nine already arrived campers. “We've already re-introduced the returning cast members from our first three seasons – minus one who's late. So, we're just going to move right on to the next generation of campers. And, because I need some cheering up …”

He pulls out a remote and looks out across the water at the incoming boats before pressing the button, making the vessels explode one after another, with a bunch of cries coming from the destroyed ships.

“Ah, much better,” Chris laughs as he wipes a tear from his eye. “Nothing like an explosion to lighten up my day. And, without further ado-”

“Sha-score! First to the island!”

“From second place in Revenge of the Island to second out in All Stars, it's Lightning!”

Lightning stands up dripping wet on the dock with arms raised. The uber-jock has bulked up even further in his time away from the competition, his definition showing clearly as his soaked training top clings to his body. There is also now a rather prominent lightning bolt tattoo on each of his biceps. His white hair still remains from being struck by his nickname-sake, though his sideburns have been grown out a little further with lightning zig-zags shaved into it. He pumps his fist against his chest a couple of times just as Jo pulls herself up out of the water.

“Followed up by the competitive triathlete who got out-schemed by a bubble-boy, it's Jo!”

Jo's appearance doesn't appear to have changed much, though it is difficult to tell underneath her drenched clothing, with her water-logged hoodie still retaining a lot of its bulk – even picking up more with the absorbed liquid. The most telltale difference to Jo is that her hair is shorter, though what she would naturally keep it as cannot be known as it has all been flattened down from her swim.

“Whatever,” Jo scoffs, slicking her hair back. “Enjoy it while it lasts, Brightning, 'cause I'm the one winning this thing.”

“Sha-na-uh! Lightning retorts as he flexes his muscles. “Lightning's in it to sha-win it! Ain't no way he's leaving the winner's circle!”

“Oh, I'm sorry, Lightning.”

Chris jumps as he suddenly realises Dawn is standing behind him. The other campers also jump after noticing her there as well, with the moonchild being completely completely dry unlike Jo and Lightning.

Dawn hasn't seemed to change much since her last and only season on the show, with the only noticeable differences being shown with her hair. A few strands from each side of her hairline have been braided together and looped round to the back of her head, with flowers threaded throughout, while the long mane of hair running down her back has been tied up with a sky blue ribbon. There's also a light green band running round the top of her head with another larger flower holding it in place.

“I could've arrived later if you'd preferred,” she adds.

“What? Lightning wasn't first? Lightning's always first!”

Lightning drops to his knees with his head in his hands, while next to him Jo slumps forwards, staring at Dawn incredulously.

“How?! Why are you not wet?! Again?!”

“Oh, there was a shortcut.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Jo]

“What shortcut?! Jo exclaims, raising her hands up before crossing her arms as they fall back down. “How does Pixie keep doing this?!”

[Confessional ends]

“So … uh …” Chris stumbles a little, visibly trying to recompose himself, “animal whisperer and seer of your deepest darkest secrets, welcome back Dawn!”

Dawn purses her lips at him with narrowed eyes, while everyone else gives her a weird look save for Cody and Sierra.

[Outhouse Confessional – Sierra]

Sierra squeals loudly as she stomps her feet.

“It's Dawn! Perhaps the biggest fan favourite in Total Drama history! Oh, except for my Cody-Woady, obviously.”

She pulls out her communications device and presses a few buttons on it, before showing the screen to the camera and revealing an image of Cody's face poorly edited over the body of a bodybuilder.

“All his blogs got so much more traffic after his performance in World Tour. The fans were going crazy! There were also a whole bunch of crazies who kept trying to get his attention.” Sierra growls at that, getting louder and angrier. “All over his socials. Sending unwanted emails. Trying to steal my man!”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Cody]

“Wooooow … she's preeeety …” Cody swoons, rocking back and forth before leaning back and cracking his knuckles. “Guess it's time for the Codemeister to get back into gear.”

He flashes a grin to the camera and clicks as he shoots his finger guns.

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Sierra]

The superfan gasps loudly as she sets her device down on her laps, leaving her hands free to clap frantically.

“Oh, I wonder if Dawn could help identify if anyone here is a threat to my Codykins? I need to find out just how her powers work – it's such a huge mystery!” Sierra picks her device back up and starts to type. “None of my extensive research techniques could gleam any answers.”

[Confessional Ends]

Jo rings out part of her hoodie as she walks up to the original cast, eyeing down the contestants she faced in All Stars.

“If this is all that Chris has brought back, there's no way that prize won't be mine,” she scoffs as a large stream of water is wrung from her hoodie. “Time to put you fallen stars back in your place – behind me.”

Gwen raises an eyebrow. “Uh, didn't you get kicked off before the rest of us All Stars?”

“That's only because dumb Old Heather interfered with my capable leadership. If she'd just followed my lead, everything would've been fine.”

“You lost,” Eva speaks up rather bluntly. “Get over it.”

Jo scowls and steps up to Eva – the stuntwoman doing the same – as the two size one another up. At least, until Chris leans in between them.

“Look, not that I don't mind the tension – actually, I love it – but can you all get back into position at the far side of the dock? We've got … something … coming in on the water.”

“Whatever,” they both snarl, jostling each other as they rejoin the other contestants, with Dawn and Lightning joining the group. Lightning ends up standing next to DJ, giving his fellow dark skinned a nod and fist bump, while Dawn stands off to the side on her own, glancing at some of the others. Cody tries to make his way over to her, only to be squeezed even tighter against Sierra.

Out on the water, three people are positioned on a floating jumble of debris pieced together into a rather solid and buoyant raft. Brick and B are on the sides of the makeshift raft rowing it in with warped scraps of metal, while Cameron stands at the back edge hacking up water.

Of the trio, Cameron is the one who appears to have changed the most physically. While he's still rather scrawny, he has at least put on a few inches. His hair has grown out a little, adding a bit more fuzz to the top of his head, while he has also grown a thin moustache that twists down to his slight beard covering his chin. Brick's hair has been buzzed even shorter, while he now displays a couple of medals proudly on his chest. B's only real difference appears to be the signs of a ponytail poking out from under his cap.

The three men glide up to the dock as it hits the wooden support beams, with Brick jumping up first and reaching out to help B up. “Excellent job crafting such a fine raft so quickly, B. I've trained on ships that were far less stable.”

B smiles and nods before both turn and offer a hand to Cameron, the bubble-boy easily being hoisted up by the two stronger men.

“I agree,” Cameron adds. “It never seemed like we were going to tip over once.”

[Outhouse Confessional – B]

B puffs some air onto his fist before wiping it down on his jacket, basking in the praise.

[Confessional Ends]

“Lookie lou, a three-for-one special,” Chris pipes up, getting back into shot. “First up, the soldier who still sleeps with a night-light …”

“Sergeant Brick MacArthur, reporting for duty!” the soldier jumps in with a salute, before his eyes widen as he realises what Chris said. “Hey!”

[Outhouse Confessional – Jo]

“Great. First Jockstrap and now G.I. Joke?” Jo groans, rolling her eyes. “What, Chris still needs me to prove I'm the most dominant competitor here? At least with Soldier Boy here, I can at least use him as an asset for a time, till I crush him like all the rest.”

[Confessional switches – Outhouse Confessional – Brick]

“It's great to be back! Especially since I was unable to compete in All Stars.” states Brick as he rubs the back of his neck. “It was a shame, but this time I'll be sure to represent my platoon honourably. Of course I'm searching to win, but I also aim to prove to Jo that I am a worthy competitor even if she wants to mock my code. And if I can outlast her, all the better.”

His fist comes down into his palm at that.

[Confessional Ends]

“Next up, a genius of few words – or, rather, none at all, Beverly !”

B glares at Chris not just for using his actual name, but also the heavy emphasis placed upon it.

“And third, graduating from being a bubble boy to a bubble-man with his win in season 4, only to have his reality burst by being medevaced out in All Stars, it's Cameron!”

Cameron gives a little wave to the contestants, only to shrink back a little as some of the more villainous competitors either glare at him, or eye him up like a lion eyeing a fresh carcass.

[Outhouse Confessional – Cameron]

“While my injuries have fully healed, my mom was still rather hesitant to let me come back out here,” Cameron gingerly admits. “Ultimately, I believe it was the optimal decision to compete once again. I would like to prove that my win was completely earned and deserved. Plus, I feel as though there's still so much more for me to learn – things that I may only learn being out here.”

[Confessional Ends]

The three new arrivals walk up to the gathered campers and start to interact – mainly to those from their same generation. B ends up walking towards Dawn, while Cameron and Brick move towards Jo and Lightning.

“It's so lovely to see you again, B!” Dawn greets as she puts a hand upon his arm. “Your aura is radiating your confidence. Have you been doing well?”

B nods and gives her a thumbs up.

“Jo, Lightning, how have you been?” Cameron asks politely, getting cold looks in return.

“Never you mind, little boy. Lightning's still owed his championship rematch with you.”

“Wha- rematch?” Cameron steps back, although Lightning fails to notice as he keeps going.

“And Lightning's gonna make sure to crush you when that happens. Sha-bam!”

Lightning punches his palm hard, causing a hard crack to sound out which – coupled with his declaration – brings Cameron to give a very audible gulp.

“Much as it pains me to say, what he said,” Jo adds on, jabbing a thumb in Lightning's direction. “You'd better stay out of my way, Toothpick. You won't stand a chance against me this time.”

“Hey, that's no way to talk to a potential teammate,” Brick interjects as he Brick marches up to Jo, standing between her and Cameron.

“Well, well, well, Sir Leaks-A-Lot. Ready to fall once more to my superior strength and leadership?”

“Negative, ma'am. This time I will make sure to lead my platoon to victory.”

“Yeah, right. The only team captain that'll be winning will be me. That is, unless Chris is dumb enough to include a pants-wetting competition.”

Cameron slowly backs away as the two rivals continue to bicker, before jumping at the slight touch on his shoulder.

“Gah!”

“Sorry, Cam!” Gwen apologises as she takes a step back. “Didn't mean to scare you.”

“Oh, Gwen. Don't worry about it. How have you been?”

“Eh, so-so. Art college has been a bit of a pain. Not that I don't love it, but still … What about you?”

“Oh, I've been wondering what to study for my next Masters. I've already covered Astrophysics, Biochemistry and Psychology, but I'm not sure what else to cover.”

“Wow, that's incredible! Hey, maybe you'd like to join me studying Art History. Could be nice to have someone who can help.”

Cameron taps his finger against his chin. “Hmm … It could be nice to study something a bit more unusual to my tastes. I'll think about it.”

Gwen chuckles a little at his seriousness. “You know it was a joke, right?”

“Well, even then, I'll still consider it.”

They laugh, until Cameron catches Courtney looking at them through the corner of her eye.

“Hello, Courtney. How have you been?” asks Cameron.

“Fine,” Courtney curtly replies as she looks away.

Cameron and Gwen's eyebrows raise a little as they glance at one another.

Seeing how all the others have started talking to one another, Noah takes it all in before looking over at Eva. “You ever get the feeling you're being ignored?”

Eva shrugs before pulling out her music player and putting in her earphones.

“Of course not.” deadpans Noah.

“Don't worry,” DJ says as he puts a hand on Noah's shoulder. “I'm sure it's just because we haven't competed against them. It's nothing personal.”

Noah raises an eyebrow, before looking the other way as Justin is seen to be too busy admiring himself in a handheld mirror. The snarker's eyebrow lowers at that as he drones, “Perfect.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Noah]

“Look, DJ may be right, and normally I wouldn't care about this at all. But, having only been on two seasons – and one not for very long – this is the sort of thing that could cost me allies, especially with that snake Alejandro around.”

Noah's eyes narrow as he brings up the Latino.

“If I'm going to show what I'm really capable of, and eliminate that greased eel while I'm at it, I'll need some help. And frankly, there's not that many candidates right now.

[Confessional Ends]

“Excuse me, Chris, but is this everyone competing?” queries Alejandro.

“Not at all,” he answers as Chef takes off to the skies wearing a jetpack and some protective gear. “In fact, there's still some-”

The host is cut off by the sloshing of water, with B's raft being smashed apart as it's scattered into the air. Bursting up from the wreckage is a large shape dripping with water – larger than any normal human. With tail protruding, a vibrant orange tinge to her skin, and a glowing green hue to her hair, the mutated form of Dakota bursts out from beneath the water and lands on the deck, growling loudly. Everyone else scrambles back with most screaming in shock, while Chris yelps and trips up over his own feet, collapsing to the deck.

“WHERE'S CHRIS?!” Dakotazoid roars.

The other competitors quickly point in his direction, with Chris glaring at them until Dakotazoid stomps towards him.

“Uh ahaha!” Chris freaks out as he crawls backwards. “The uh … th-the heiress of a vast h-hotel chain a-and inheritor of mutant powers … Da-da-dakota-a!”

Dakotazoid continues to stomp up to the host, before Dawn suddenly appears between the two with arms outstretched.

“Dakota! Please calm down!”

“BUT CHRIS!”

“I know. This heinous man must pay the price for his deviousness. And karma will strike her fury upon him for his crimes towards Mother Nature.”

“I fail to see how diversifying nature with a sprinkling of toxic waste is a bad thing,” Chris pipes up. “Look how well it turned out for Dakota.”

The mutant snarls at him, making him yelp and shrink back, forcing Dawn to continue her appeal.

“But it would not do for you to tarnish your hopes and dreams by attacking this villain. What if it leads to you being kicked off?”

“BUT. DAKOTA. SO. ANGRY! CHRIS BLOW UP SHIP!”

“Here, try sitting down with me,” the moonchild says as she sits down in a lotus position, with Dakota reluctantly following along.

Dawn: (smiles and closes her eyes) “Close your eyes,” she instructs with a smile as she closes her eyes, Dakota following along. “Now, think about what makes you happy.”

“SAM!” Dakotazoid says with a toothy smile. “DAKOTA MISS SAM.”

“I know, I know.” Dawn pats the mutated knee before continuing. “Now, breathe in.”

Both do. “And out.”

Both do. “And keep Sam in your mind.”

As Dawn continues leading Dakota in some calming breathing exercises, the mutated heiress slowly starts to transform back into her far more human figure. Save for the still vivid green hair, her appearance looks just like when she first appeared on Total Drama cameras. The moonchild opens her eyes and brings her hands together as she takes in Dakota's reversion.

“Better?”

Dakota nods, “Better.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Dakota]

“Chris better watch his step. Part of the reason he can be back at all is because of the settlement between the show and daddy because of my mutation,” Dakota explains as she pulls out a phone and holds it off to the side, posing with a peace sign as she snaps a selfie. “They improve their medical facilities and response, their liability clauses, and get my adorable self back on for more camera time – I still need my spin-off series, after all – and daddy won't sue the show and Chris for everything they're worth because of my mutation and treatment.”

As she goes down the list, she takes a few different poses – pausing each time as the shutter effect sounds each time. Following the pout, the duck lips and, lastly, running her free hand through her hair, she pockets her phone before finally giving the confessional cam her full attention.

“Still, that doesn't mean I'm going to let Chris get off that easily. I'll be sure to run that tired old momma's boy into the ground.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Dawn]

“I really don't think it's a good idea for Dakota to be back on the show,” Dawn says, sitting cross-legged as she holds out a finger for a butterfly to perch on. “While it can certainly be a good idea at times for victims to face the source of their trauma, I sense that Dakota's rage towards Chris is only going to regress any healing she may have already faced. Not to mention being away from Sam …”

The butterfly flutters back up off her finger as she lets out a sigh.

“Maybe I'm jumping to conclusions.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Jo]

“While Daddy's Little Princess can really grind my gears, I honestly wouldn't mind wrestling with Dakotazoid,” Jo admits with the crack of her knuckles. “It's about time I got a nice challenge from someone, and it's not like anyone else here's going to give me that.”

[Confessional Ends]

Chris picks himself up as Dawn and Dakota walk back past him, with the host pausing briefly as Dakota glares at him. Getting to the rest of the combined casts, Dakota pulls out a handheld mirror and makeup brush as she quickly touches herself up, before blowing a kiss to the camera – a fair amount of the contestants giving her uneasy looks. Chris finishes brushing himself down before returning to his usual bravado.

“Alright, now that that situation has been sorted out, it's time to …” Chris pauses and looks over to the gathered cast, eyes flicking over each person. “Fourteen, fifteen, sixteen … huh, seems like we're missing one.”

As he finishes saying that, a loud scream comes from offscreen as a blue shoots out of the water past Chris. Stuck to Lightning clinging desperately to the uber-jock's muscled biceps is Scott, breathing rapidly as he jitters with shaken arms.

“Dude, get your arms off the Lightning!” Lightning fusses as he tries to pry Scott off his arm to little effect, as Scott continues to cling on with a vice-like grip.

“F-F-Fa-Fang!”

Most of the gathered contestants who'd competed in Revenge Against the Island and All Stars gasp and look into the water as the top of the mutated shark pokes up above the surface. He gives a wide toothy grin at the lot as he eyes up his favourite chew toy, before disappearing back down into the lake. Lightning, being one of the ones not phased by – or perhaps even noticing – Fang, starts to rapidly shake his arm up and down, finally managing to fling the dirt farmer from his arm as Fang submerges.

[Outhouse Confessional – Lightning]

“Man, Lightning don't judge, but he does not want dude's clinging to him outside of competing,” the gifted athlete protests with his hands on his knees. “Lightning gets it, he's irresistible.”

At this, he flexes his biceps, adding, “After all, look at this sexy beast,” and giving one bicep a kiss, before folding his arms. “But the Lightning does not swing that way. Now, the ladies? The ladies can join him whenever they please.”

[Confessional Ends]

“Ah, there you are,” the uncaring host beams, loving Scott's visible terror. “The final returning member from the second generation, the challenge throwing dirt farmer loved by all kinds of sharks, it's Scott!”

“Why the hell is Fang here?!” Scott demands as he picks himself up off the dock, getting a shrug from McLean. In the few years since he was last seen, the dirt farmer has grown out a short scraggly beard, mostly covering just his chin, while a tuft of chest hair is poking up from the cut of his tank top.

“Why not?”

Chris has a nice chuckle before stopping as he realises the farmer is growling quite angrily.

“What sort of show do you think we'd be running if we didn't bring that killing machine back?” he continues. “Especially with you back in the game?”

Scott scoffs and crosses his arms over his hairy chest, looking to collect himself. “Whatever.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Scott]

The ginger farmer leans back against the left outhouse wall, bouncing a rock against the right.

“It's not like it'll matter whether that F-F-Fang,” he seizes up at his own mention of the vicious mutant shark, “i-is around.” 

He looks side to side before relaxing a little.

“Papi didn't raise no wuss. I'm winning the money this time, and ain't no m-m-mutant sh-shark …” Scott seizes up again as he stammers through the words before bringing himself back under control, “o-or anyone else gonna be able to stop me.”

He gives a smile to the camera, though it is obvious that it is not reflected in his eyes.

[Confessional Ends]

Chris shoves Scott back, the ginger sliding back into the rest of the contestants. He comes to a stop as he bumps into B, with the silent genius glaring at him along with Dawn.

“Anywho, now that you're all here and I've had my fun,” the host starts as he peers down at his phone, “and a certain someone is still being a hassle … guess it's time to bring in our returning campers from Pahkitew Island!”

McLean turns to the sky and holds a megaphone to his mouth. “Chef!”

The current arrivals all look up at the sky to see a large military helicopter hovering above them, with what looks like a shipping crate attached underneath. From within the cockpit, Chef pressed down a big red button. With that, the bottom of the crate opens up, and several contestants shriek as they're dropped out of the sky.

“Introducing the Aussie Amazon with a giant fear of tiny places, Jasmine!”

Jasmine is shown plummeting with her arms flailing, a parachute pack strapped to her back. It doesn't appear like the survivalist has changed much during her time away, outside of a rather long scar running down her right cheek.

“Not this again!” she cries out, clenching her eyes shut as she pulls the cords for her parachute. The pack opens up and the white chute unfurls above her, the dark skinned Aussie looking up in relief.

“You bloody ripper!” she sighs in relief before glares at the ground. “Not funny, Chris!”

“I beg to differ,” the host retorts as the camera cuts back to him. “Especially seeing who's next.”

Back in the sky, Jasmine's glare disappears as a different scream comes from above her. Quickly panning up, Shawn is plummeting at quite the rate. The zombie fanatic's hair has grown even thicker and wilder over time, unkempt even while being contained under his beanie. Otherwise, he also shares a scar similar to Jasmine – though his is on his left cheek.

“Don't be a zombie, don't be a zombie, don't be a zombie …” Shawn winces, clutching onto this parachute cord before pulling it. The pack opens, letting a mix of acorns, almonds, cashews, hazelnuts and pecans come spilling out. “Ah, nuts.”

Shawn comes to an abrupt stop as he is now hanging upside down. Confused himself, he looks up to see Jasmine holding onto his leg, having caught him mid-fall.

“Jasmine! Thank goodness!”

“Her zombie obsessed boyfriend and winner of Pahkitew Island, Shawn!” Chris introduces from off-screen.

“Please don't let go!”

“Wouldn't dream of it!” his girlfriend says with a smile.

The two quickly right Shawn back head up as he now clings onto Jasmine's waist while the survivalist wraps an arm around him.

[Outhouse Confessional – Shawn]

“Of course this happens after I choose to forgo the wingsuit,” he complains. “Being able to glide up and over the zombie hoard makes getaways much safer – especially if you get cornered up high. But, with the reduced funds I had after splitting the million with Jasmine, it was either the wingsuit or the UV light panels to cover the ceiling, walls and floor of the path to the entrance of our bunker.”

He pulls out a notepad and pen before scribbling something down. “Well, guess that's now going to the top of the necessities.”

[Confessional Ends]

The couple continue their much slower descent down to the ground with a bit more peace of mind now. That is, only until both Amy and Sammy plummet past them, screaming all the way.

“Next, it's the drama inducing cheerleader, the better twin, it's Amy!”

“You better break my fall, Samey!” the evil twin shouts as she plummets, looking over at her ever so slightly younger twin.

Back on the ground, McLean's expression drops as he slumps a little, his enthusiasm vanishing. “Oh yeah, and the cheating lesser twin, Samey.”

Back in the sky, Sammy gives a worried glance to her sister before pulling on her cord. The pack on her back opens up. It stays open. And yet, nothing comes out.

“Nothing but air! How very not surprising!” jabs Amy with a nasty grin. “Useless as always!”

Sammy screams and reaches out, clinging to her twin as they continue to fall. That is, until Amy pulls on the cord to her own pack which brings forth a parachute. The quick change in velocity causes Sammy to slide down her sister, managing to keep herself clinging on to Amy's legs.

With the two no longer plummeting as fast, their hair and outfits no longer buffeting through the air – the camera can reveal the twin's changes far more easily. Amy's hair has grown a little longer, including a long portion of her bangs that have been swept over to partially cover the right side of her face – obscuring that eye and her beauty mark. Her red and white-trimmed cheerleader uniform also appears to hug her figure a little snugger than before, in turn showing off a touch more skin than before. Whether this is down to the outfit being a size or two smaller, or the mean twin having grown in more areas than just her hair remains difficult to tell.

Sammy has opted not to adopt the sweeping bangs that her sister has, instead keeping her hair back with a red hair ribbon – adding one more difference between the twins besides the beauty mark. Unlike the other contestants who have arrived, Sammy is the first to have any difference to her iconic outfit. While still in a matching red and white-trimmed cheerleader outfit to her sisters, the sleeves of the nice twin's uniform are long, covering her arms completely. She also has a pair of black stockings covering up the skin that would be on display between her skirt and knee high boots. With these changes, it is a little hard to see if she's physically developed in the same way that her sister potentially has, although at a glance any difference between the two is not obvious.

“Ha! See?! Clearly I'm the better twin!” Amy gloats as she looks up at her parachute, though with the slightest touch of relief threaded through her tone. “Like, obviously they'd want to save me over you!”

Samey can only whimper as she responds, “Yes, sis ...” with a downcast look, though that is overcome with panic as she's suddenly rocked back and forth by Amy swinging. “What are you-?!”

“Well, you're clearly not needed now that I'm safe.”

“N-No! Amy! Please!” Sammy screams.

Amy keeps swinging trying to fling her sister off her legs. Chris watches their fight – if it can be called that – with a satisfied grin.

“She can't really make her fall, right?: Courtney steps up to Chris, looking up with him. “She's got an emergency parachute?”

Chris gives her a strange look. “What kind of show do you think we're running?”

Courtney's mouth drops open as Brick dashes up to the two. “Shouldn't we do something? In case she does fall?”

“Not my problem,” the host replies with a shrug. “Contract's already signed.”

Many of the contestants gasp, their eyes wide with shock.

Dakota starts to stomp forward herself, the rough edge of a growl building at the back of her throat. “Chris, you better not-”

“I'll have you know, Dakota, that I'm not breaking any part of our agreement with your daddy,” Chris interrupts. “So zip it!”

Dakota's eyes seem to blank a little at that before she lets out a rather dangerous snarl.

“But you can't just do nothing!” the soldier pleads.

The host focuses on the three who stepped forwards with a rather unamused expression.

“Alright, fine. You want me to do something?” he asks, before putting his host-face back on. “I can introduce our next competitor!”

Brick looks stunned, along with a few of the campers in the background. Although the camera does catch B at the back of the group appearing to run off from the others, his quick departure seemingly unnoticed by anyone else. Instead they are looking at the soldier who sputters at a loss for words, only managing to find his tongue a few beats after.

“Wait, what?! No, that's not what-”

“She's an aspiring Olympic gymnast and the runner-up of Pahkitew Island,” Chris pushes on, completely ignoring Brick's protests, “give it up for Sky!”

Sky's cries are heard from up above, the camera quickly panning up to see her with her parachute already open and working, instead having to deal with being buffeted by the wind. Sky's hair has grown out more in the few years since Pahkitew Island, with the gymnast keeping it tied back in a ponytail. Otherwise, she appears to look the same, though her lower half may be slightly thicker than before – a subject discussed on various fan sites and blogs, including a couple of Sierra's.

“Woah! Wo-o-o-o-ah!” she cries out as she grips onto the straps of her pack rather tightly, continuing to be knocked around by gusts of wind. Her nervous look quickly morphs into horror as a tearing sound is heard, with Sky glancing up to see some holes forming in the fabric.

“Oh no! Nononononononono!”

The parachute continues to tear apart as her descent speeds back up much to her distress, having already been blown over land instead of water. Desperately looking around, she manages to correct her course ever so slightly before taking off her increasingly useless pack and falling towards a fir tree. Tucking her legs into herself, Sky manages to catch the tree trunk at just the right angle that she rolls off a rather strong and curved branch, launching herself towards another tree. Reaching a branch on the next tree, she comes out of her tuck and lands on the edge of another branch, using it to springboard up and over towards the beach. As she comes down onto the sand, she once again tucks her legs in to roll across the beachfront, only to then turn the rolling momentum into three forward flips hand over feet followed by a corkscrew flip that – thanks to her momentum – sends her up onto the dock, landing with perfect form. She looks around at her surroundings for a quick moment, before sagging into herself with great relief.

“Oh, thank goodness!”

Several contestants look surprised and impressed with Sky's recovery, in particular Jo's stunned look with her jaw hanging open, and Lightning's wide-eyed gaze with his mouth caught somewhere between slack-jawed shock and a broad smile. Of all the group, the only one who can muster up any words at all is Eva.

“How the hell?!”

[Outhouse Confessional – Lightning]

“Sha-wow! That girl's got skills!” Lightning complements, a rare display of genuine appreciation considering it's not for himself. “Of course, Lightning doesn't need a team – he is a team of one!”

In a return to form he kisses his flexed bicep once again.

“However, if Lightning must be part of a team, then he guesses that being with her wouldn't be too bad. Better than that sha-traitor Jo, anyway.”

[Confessional Ends]

As Sky starts to walk up to the large group, the continued bickering of the twins causes everyone to look back up.

“Like, you've been weighing me down all your life, Samey. Let go!” Amy barks, still swinging back and forth.

“No! Please!” her sister pleads, getting even more panicky as she does appear to be slipping down.

“I. Said. Let. GO!”

With one final swing forwards Amy delivers a kick to knock Sammy off, the younger twin shrieking as she falls while taking one of Amy's white boots with her. The cast members gasp and yell, except for the returning B who grabs ahold of Brick and DJ and brings them out into space on the dock. He hands each of them a corner of a rope net and takes the other two for himself, before quickly positioning the three of them while glancing up above. Sammy comes falling down but lands in the net, held with enough give that it doesn't bounce her back up like a trampoline. While the gathered campers mainly seem relieved, Sammy still screams a little as DJ and Brick lower their corners and help her to her feet.

“Calm down, soldier. You're safe!”

Sammy still lets out some anxious breaths as DJ holds onto her shoulders and Brick stands beside them, the nice twin eventually calming down.

“I-I'm alive?” Sammy breathes, patting her body with her hand – and Amy's boot held in a vice grip – in a need to check that it is true. When it finally sinks in, she lets out a shaky laugh and a disbelieving smile. “I'm alive! Thank you! Thank you!”

On each 'thank you' she gives first DJ and then Brick a tight hug – her sister's boot still held fast in her grip.

“No problem,” DJ returns her hug with a gentle one of his own, before letting Sammy dash to Brick who also gives a gentle hug to her.

“Of course, ma'am. Though you should also thank B.” Brick releases Sammy and turns to B with a salute. “Excellent thinking, soldier!”

B pauses rolling the net up to give a thumbs up with a soft smile, before his eyes go a little wide as Sammy comes up and hugs him too, the genius holding his arms wide of her along with the trailing net.

“Thank you!”

B gives a smile and a couple pats on her shoulder before they look up as Amy comes down. “Ugh! Fine! I guess you can stay.”

Amy touches down, putting most of her weight on her remaining boot while she ignores the glares sent her way. Sammy, meanwhile, quickly detaches herself from B.

“Even though you're so useless you couldn't even break my fall,” Amy tacks on with a slight shrug as she undoes the straps for her parachute pack Once it's off she glares down at her boot-less leg, before glancing back as Jasmine cuts in.

“Are you kidding me?!” Jasmine yells as she and Shawn land onto the docks, Shawn letting go of his girlfriend as the Aussie wastes no time removing her pack before storming up to the evil twin. “What the bloody hell was that?!”

“Um, what was what?”

“You could'a killed her!”

“Ohmygosh!” the mean twin huffs, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “Like, what is your problem?”

Shawn now steps up to Jasmine as the Amazon towers over the mean twin. “What's my problem?! What's yours?!”

“Why do you even care? It's not like she's your parasitic twin.”

Jasmine growls as Shawn gets in the middle of the two, trying to hold Jasmine back. Meanwhile, Sammy shrinks into herself further, almost hugging Amy's loose boot. The rest of the cast watch on with rather wide eyes, save for Justin looking into his hand mirror and Chris who's watching on rather pleased.

“Easy, Jaz,” Shawn warns, making an effort to try and pull Jasmine away from Amy.

“No, she's my friend!” Jasmine replies to the mean twin, seemingly ignoring her boyfriend – who's efforts to pull her back also appear to be ineffective. “And clearly I care about her more than you do! You tried to kill your own sister!”

“Oh my god! I did not! I was just helping Samey get down so she could do her job as the lesser me and break my fall.” Amy spits out before pointing behind her at the remaining campers. “Besides, it's not like this bunch of bozos tried to help her anyway.”

“What?!” a bunch of them exclaim.

“Clearly they all thought Samey would be fine,” she continues. “Or didn't care if something happened to her.”

“How dare you?!” a visibly cross Courtney yells back.

[Outhouse Confessional – Courtney]

In comparison to her fuming visage just before, the Courtney present in the confessional looks oddly nonchalant.

“I mean sure, I'm not too fussed what happens to Samey. If she got injured, then that's one less competitor standing in the way of my million dollars,” she explains. “Still, I'm not an idiot. At least by making a show that I do care, it puts her far, far below me on the list of who'll be sticking around. You know, in case I get the great misfortune of being put on her team.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Sierra]

“Death warrant, signed and sealed,” Sierra bluntly puts, pretending to squiggle a signature in the air. “No one alienates the majority of the competition and lasts long. That is, unless she's managed to inject herself with Heather's unusual knack for survival along with her attitude.”

She pauses with that, suddenly switching to a thoughtful expression as she taps a finger against her chin.

“Then again, Chris may just try to keep her around for the sake of drama ,” this she puts with added air quotes, “by having her swap teams during an elimination ceremony. TL;DR, by my calculations, she won't last long.”

[Confessional Ends]

Brick steps forwards as B gently pats Sammy's shoulder, shaking his head as she looks up at him trying to convey how he thinks what her sister said isn't true.

“Begging your pardon, miss, but my comrades and I did all jump in to protect Miss Samey,” Brick points out, though he misses the slight wince Sammy makes when he calls her the wrong name. He's instead busy gesturing over to B and DJ, both men standing by Sammy and glaring at the evil twin.

Amy gives them a look for a beat before sighing and rolling her eyes. “Whatever.”

With that, Chris walks back into shot with a clipboard in his hands. “Yeah, much as I'm enjoying this fantastic spat, this looks like it's turned into all chatter with no splatter.”

“Splatter?!” Brick repeats with wide eyes.

“Whoops, sorry,” the host says, sounding like he's trying to keep a laugh down. “I meant splashing. Anyway, mind joining your fellow campers?”

“Fine,” Amy whines, though she first heads towards her sister. “Just give me back my boot. I am not getting a splinter from this awful dock.”

She snatches her boot back and puts it back on before marching over and standing in front of the large group of campers with a huff. Having folded her arms over her chest again, she taps her fingers against her bicep for a few moments before shouting out to her sister.

“Well what are you waiting for, Samey? Get over here!”

Sammy just whimpers and nods as she walks over to her sister's side. Jasmine looks concerned and shares a look with Shawn, before sharing another with B, Brick and DJ. The five head back over together and join the gathered cast. The camera focuses on Sammy's very downcast look and poise and Amy's very smug expression as they stand in front of the others, seemingly ignoring the many glares sent Amy's way and the few sympathetic looks to Sammy.

“After all that, it looks as though we've only got one competitor missing. I was kinda hoping for more,” McLean admits as he pulls out a walkie-talkie and starts speaking into it. “Chef, we're missing one down here.”

A slight burst of static sparks out before it cuts to some indiscernible chatter.

“What do you mean 'a hanger on'? How did that happen?”

Some more indiscernible chatter comes through.

“Well, did you try the crowbar?”

Another burst of feedback, which then brings Chris to suddenly beam brightly.

“Excellent.” he puts away the walkie-talkie and turns his focus to the cast. “Looks like she's on her way down.”

Everyone looks to the skies as Sugar comes plummeting down, screaming loudly and clutching what looks like half of a cushioned seat, with a couple of bits of fluff coming loose and getting caught in the air. It doesn't appear as though she's had any obvious physical changes over the last few years, though it is a little tough to tell.

“Please welcome the pageant queen whose play style comes with lots of spice, and has never been accused of being anything nice, it's Sugar!”

“Save me, wizard!” Sugar hollers loudly, squeezing the cushioned seat a little tighter and pushing a little more stuffing out.

Hearing her cries, Noah looks around before asking Sky, “Was Leonard on the helicopter?”

“No, but she was convinced he was.”

“She thought he was invisible,” Jasmine adds on.

“Wizaaaaaard!” the pageant queen screams, her pitch causing many of the cast to wince and cover their ears with their hands.

“Pull your cord, Sugar!” Shawn eventually shouts up with his hands cupping his mouth, getting a weird look from his girlfriend for his actions.

[Outhouse Confessional – Shawn]

“Hey, I may not like her, but it's not like I want her to die. Besides, she could be carrying a dormant zombie virus that'll activate upon her death. You can never be too careful.”

[Confessional Ends]

“No way!” Sugar angrily yells back. “You're just trying to stop the wizard's magic from working!”

“N-No, no! It's … uh … It activates a magic cloak that'll amplify Leonard's spell!” Sky hesitantly joins in, though it seems to convince Sugar as her anger fades away.

“Oh, well in that case …”

Sugar flings the torn half-seat away from her and pulls the cord. However, with the force of her action she spins round so she's now falling back first as her parachute opens, causing the fabric to spill out and engulf the falling commercial model.

“It works! Leonard's wizard cloak-!”

Sugar is cut off as the falling ball of fabric and pageant queen bombs into the water, causing a large splash that brings a slight drizzle to shower the other competitors – other than Chris who's managed to pull an umbrella out from somewhere to keep himself dry.

“Finally! That was perfect! Chris cackles, wiping a tear from his eye. “Will anyone else make a splash on the scene? Who else is waiting in the wings to compete?”

“Aww, there's more?” Dakota moans.

“Seriously, just how many of us are there?” Scott adds.

“Ahem!” McLean loudly interjects with a glare at the two before returning to looking down the camera. “Find out these questions and more in the most stacked season of Total Drama right after this!”

----------

Commercial Break

“Ever wonder what it's like to have a rotten toddler ruining your life?”

A scene plays of a young toddler wailing loudly, banging his drinking cup against a coffee table while his parents grimace, their hands pressed up hard to cover their ears.

“Want to see what it's like to have a child before taking the plunge?”

A new scene plays of a young girl running around the house with a freshly broken vase left behind her, her father's face turning a bright red as a vein bulges on his forehead.

“Or do you just like to laugh at parents having a miserable time?”

A third scene plays of a mother completely drained of energy while two toddlers run around bouncing off the walls. One wears a pot like a helmet while clanging two pans together, while the other smears some brown … something … on the carpet.

“Well, no matter what your answer, come watch as Dr Jill gets these mental patients-to-be through their new teething problems on Tan-Trauma Center; airing new episodes on the Total Drama Network at 8pm Pacific on Terrible Twos-days!”

----------

The camera cuts back to a long shot of the docks with all the currently introduced competitors, Sugar having been fished out of the water and still dripping wet – her soaked hair a testament to this as it hangs heavy over her face.

“Welcome back to Total Drama: Destination Stardom!” Chris says. “Before the commercial break, I may or may not have alluded to the idea that there would be more people joining you here on the island.”

“But the show's never been this stacked before,” Sierra notes. “We've already broken the most cast members, unless you want to count each individual racer on-”

“Zip it, Sierra. I wasn't done,” the host cuts her off, leading her to cross her arms in a huff. “Although, that does segue quite nicely to our next group. A little while back the Total Drama machine was behind a different type of competition; a race around the world!”

“Different formula, better host,” Noah pipes up with his usual deadpan tone.

“Different host,” Chris stresses, “not better. Besides, I had other obligations to fill.”

“Maybe the wizard's curse got all up in Chris' insides and made his tummy gurgle something fierce?” Sugar theorises, gripping her own belly and giving it a shake. “Y'know, because of his screwy elimination?”

“I wouldn't be so smug, Sugar. It was the crummy ratings and reception Pahkitew pulled in that forced us to look in a different direction.”

“That's because they all knew should'a been the one to win that pageant,” snaps the pageant queen, whipping her hair back over her head and getting a few complaints from the campers standing behind her who are given a bit of a spray.

“Nah, you lot just weren't all that good,” Chris quickly shoots her down. “Why do you think there's less of you than the other gens?”

Those who competed on Pahkitew Island give him a glare, except for Sammy who's still miserable. Scott is shown smirking at their reactions.

“Yeah, don't be too glad, Scott. All-Stars sucked hard too.” McLean jabs again. “Dunno what happened, you all kinda lost your marbles.”

The All-Stars cast now join in on glaring at the host. Who just continues on with his speech.

“Anyway, in order to help get that different show up and off the ground for its first – and so far only season,” Chris looks quite pleased at that last bit, “a number of our Total Drama contestants were accepted onto the show to compete. In exchange, we could use the same number of racers on a proper Total Drama season. Five for five.

“Guess your mind is slipping in your old age, because there were only four of us on there,” Noah points out before counting them out on his fingers. “Myself, Owen, Geoff and Leonard.”

“Actually, my mind is perfectly fine in my youthful vigour,” McLean smugly retorts. “You see, while it was indeed you four that went along, a certain surfer chick and Aftermath host was also supposed to compete before she was cut at the last moment on special request for a charity run. But, because she was already contracted, the five still stands. And so … Chef!”

The military helicopter that had been flying above the island that dropped off the Pahkitew crew comes descending quickly, stirring up a bit of vapour from the surface of the water. At the press of another button within the cockpit, the shipping crate detaches from the base of the vehicle and plunges into the sea below. Several contestants gasp, though some for different reasons.

“Ah yes, because the mark of a better host is trying to kill your contestants outright …” Noah drones, keeps up his sarcastic backchat.

“Don't you know it!” Chris replies with a beaming grin, one that quickly withers under the scrutinising looks thrown back at him. “Relax, they aren't in there. Makes it easier to land and get rid of the crate at the same time.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Dawn]

“I'd hoped that Chris would've learned not to dump his waste unsafely after his encounter with toxic waste. Unfortunately, he is still committed to his wasteful ways.”

The moonchild brings her hands together in a praying position as she looks upwards. “Oh, I pray to the Earth Mother that her aquatic life can survive this desecration to their beautiful home.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Cameron]

“While it's certainly problematic, I've read about many scenarios where the creatures of the sea claim shipwrecks and sunken goods, transforming the ruins into new reefs for them to live amongst.”

Cameron's eyes lighten up at the thought.

“Perhaps this will be a chance to observe the changes myself!”

[Confessional Ends]

As the shipping crate sinks beneath the surface, Chef flies the helicopter over the dock before coming down onto the beach that Sky had previously flipped along, the rapid whirl of the rotors picking sand up and blowing some over to the contestants who enter a coughing fit along with Chris. The whirl of the blades power down before Chef walks out of the cockpit, standing over by the sliding door on the side of the vehicle while McLean walks over, letting out a last couple of coughs and brushing his outfit down of any clinging sand.

“First up,” he starts as he holds out a hand which Chef puts a file into. The host opens it up and quickly gives it a once over, his eyes lighting up with each line scanned. “She's a glamorous diva with style, fashion and athletic ability to boot, give it up for Jen!”

Chef rolls open the sliding door as the fashionista and one half of the Fashion Bloggers steps into view, getting into a few different poses as camera flashes light up the view. She practically looks the same as she did back on The Ridonculous Race, her gorgeous image having been meticulously maintained thanks to her dietitian and beautician. A group of paparazzi kneel before the docks on the sands taking picture after picture, while Dakota glares down at them.

“Um, hello?” the heiress whines. “You're supposed to be taking pictures of me!”

The paparazzi don't turn around, causing Dakota to pout with her hands on her hips. Turning her head away in a huff, she suddenly freezes up as she notices a good percentage of the single male contestants are transfixed on Jen's posing, watching with interest.

[Outhouse Confessional – Justin]

“Wooooow,” the male model swoons, “she's gorgeous.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Cody]

A rosy-faced Cody clears his throat a little as he tugs at his collar, his eyes darting from side to side.

“I-Is it getting hot in here all of a sudden?”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Justin]

“Couldn't you just imagine it? A diva like her and my beautiful model looks?”

He pulls out a handheld mirror and leans back, admiring his own handsome visage.

“We'd take the world by storm.”

[Confessional Ends]

Jen holds a couple more poses before finishing with a kiss to the cameras. Her posing finished, she gracefully exits the chopper – taking Chris' hand as he holds it out to her to help her down.

“Thank you, Chris. By the way, I love your hair. The windswept look totally suits you.”

“I know!” the host boasts looking extremely pleased.

“The rest of your ensemble works too …” the fashionista continues, placing a couple fingers on her chin as she looks Chris up and down scrutinising his appearance. “Although, it looks a little too ruffled, like you're trying too hard to make it look like you're not even trying.”

He takes a look down at himself at her observation. “Yeah, the chopper kinda did a number on it.”

“Hmm … maybe … guess I'll just have to see later.”

Jen leaves him behind, not noticing leaning over to Chef and cupping his mouth with his hand.

“Remind me to call my stylist once we wrap up here,” he whispers to Chef who nods and hums in confirmation.

Ignorant to this, Jen struts across the beach over to the rest of the contestants.

“Oh, hey guys, it's so great to meet you all!”

Dakota just sulks while the others give her relatively friendly looks at worst, save for a glare from Amy and Sammy looking down at her feet.

[Outhouse Confessional – Jen]

The fashionista starts off by waving to the camera, using both hands vigorously.

“Hey hey hey, to all my fashion blog followers! I was so surprised to get contacted by Total Drama asking me to come over. Of course, it would've been great for Tom to join me here, but don't worry! He'll be maintaining our blog and posting while I'm competing here. That's Now Trending with Tom and Jen for all you newbies out there looking for some fashion tips.”

[Confessional Ends]

“And with that ...” Chris flips over to the next page in the file before trying to hold back his snickers. “Ok, ok …”

Chef leans in and has a look, catching a snigger himself, before both men start howling with laughter.

The camera switches to focus on Noah watching with an eyebrow raised, before turning as he gets a nudge from DJ who leans in.

“Any idea who it could be?” DJ whispers.

“Not really,” he shakes his head with his answer. “I can't really think of anyone those two would be that amused to see except ...”

Noah trails off as something seems to be nagging at him, the snarker mentally going through The Ridonculous Race teams. It isn't long before his eyes widen, as if the answer suddenly clicked into his mind.

“Oh no!”

Chris and Chef wipe their tears from their eyes before Chris composes himself somewhat.

“Yeah, this is going to be good!” he beams before finally bringing himself back to his 'professional' self. “Next up, two contestants with the most problems anyone's ever heard of, with the determination to face everything the world throws at them, it's Jay and Mickey! The Adversity Twins!”

Stepping into sight this time are the two identical twin brothers, both looking rather similar to when they previously competed. Both brothers have gained a few inches in height and have had their mops of auburn hair get thicker. They had also gained a few pimples on their faces, with Jay also gaining a small blotch on his neck. Mickey also still wears his protective helmet, helping to tell the two apart.

“Um, hi …” Mickey tentatively waves, with his brother stepping in.

“It's nice to meet you-”

Jay starts to walk forwards only to trip up and fall out of the helicopter, collapsing down on the sand.

“Oww!” he cries out as he hits the beach before bringing out a sniffle. “Uh-oh ... ACHOOOO!”

Jay's sneeze kicks up a cloud of sand which partly obscures his brother.

“Jay!” Mickey calls out, jumping down in order to aid his brother. That is, until his eyes go wide as he stands in the sandy cloud.

“S-So i-itchy …”

“ACHOOOO!”

Jay's next sneeze kicks up another cloud of sand, leaving Mickey to start furiously scratching himself.

“ITCHY! AHHHHHHH!”

Mickey quickly starts running away, scratching himself as he goes, with Jay struggling to pick himself off the ground.

“M-Mi- ugh ... Mickey! ACHOOOO! W-Wa- ACHOO! Wait! Ugh ... Up!”

Jay starts running off after his brother, still continuing to sneeze as the two run off-shot. Chris and Chef start crying with laughter yet again – Chris even falling on his back, before the camera pans across the faces of the other contestants who are all either wide eyed or wincing.

[Outhouse Confessional – Noah]

Noah draws out a long sigh as he pinches the bridge of his nose before looking up and looking down the camera.

“Those two are just a glutton for punishment, aren't they?”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Alejandro]

Alejandro just lazes back against the outhouse wall wearing a blank expression.

“Ok, that's just sad. Funny. But still sad.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Cameron]

“Wow. Seems a bit harsh to subject those two to this kind of competition if they have such varied disadvantages.”

Cameron pauses, his eyes widen as it seems like something clicks in his mind.

“Wait, was that what everyone thought when they first saw me on this show?”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Mickey & Jay]

The Adversity Twins are sat together, Mickey absentmindedly scratching his arm and Jay holding a tissue to his nose.

“Yeah, at first glance this doesn't look like we should be here,” Jay sniffles.

“But, that's what everyone thought about us competing on The Ridonculous Race as well,” Mickey adds on. “And look how we went then.”

“Yeah! So no matter what they can throw at us, no germs-”

Mickey freezes up at that. “Germs?”

“Bugs-” Jay continues on, not noticing his brother's reaction.

“Bugs?!” Mickey whimpers.

“-or monsters they throw our way, we'll face it head on.”

“Monsters?!” Mickey squeaks out.

“Huh?” Jay finally glances over at his brother, curled into himself with his eyes twitching and teeth chattering. “Mickey?”

“GET ME OUTTA HERE!”

Mickey runs screaming from the outhouse confessional, the view pushing out with a loud crash before panning back in with the door closing revealing Jay all on his own. The remaining twin looks blankly for a moment before his shoulders drop and he sags forwards.

“Yeah, this was a terrible idea.”

[Confessional Ends]

Chris picks himself up off the sand as he and Chef start to come down from their laughing fits.

“Boy, am I glad those two get to compete! Let's see who else we've been sent.”

He reopens the file and takes a look, quickly adopting an impressed expression.

“Well, well, well! Looks like we get a real competitor,” the file snaps shut as the host looks down the camera. “He's a professional athlete who's won gold everywhere he's gone, except for in the Olympics and in the unnamed race, it's Jacques!”

The ice skating Olympian steps out to a magnificent trumpet fanfare, blowing kisses to each side as he stands with a broad confident smile. Unsurprisingly, the champion figure skater hasn't changed much since his finale appearance, continuing to wear his pink and magenta leotard with the wool vest slung over the top. The only new addition is the pair of violet lensed sunglasses – once part of his and Josee's dark ensemble – that sit perched atop his golden pompadour.

[Outhouse Confessional – Sky]

“Oh, I remember them!” a giddy Sky says with a bounce. “They only got silver because she hit the ice right at the climax of the performance. It was a real shame, though I always thought she over-rotated and caused that mistake.”

She pauses as she furrows her brow, tilting her head ever so slightly.

“Mind you, my sister did say that they were both a nightmare to be around ... I guess not all Olympians have winning personalities.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Noah]

“And here I was thinking Alejandro was going to be my biggest nightmare,” Noah groans as he facepalms. “Silly me.”

He pulls his hand back and gives the camera a blank look.

“Well, it could be worse. It could be Josee.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Jacques]

Jacques stares at his surroundings in disgust, keeping his hands up to avoid touching anything.

“After that utterly disgraceful finish to The Ridonculous Race, Josee nearly destroyed half of New York! It was a miracle we managed to get her out of there without any injuries.”

A quick clip reel of the Ice Dancers being eliminated in third place during The Ridonculous Race is played, showing Josee leaping up on top of the fountain at the chill zone before she starts to tear it apart with her bare hands. After she hurls a stone wing away, the camera cuts back to Jacques in the confessional, his arms crossed over his chest and his hands now covered in a pair of sparkly shimmering gloves.

“Still, this is my chance for redemption. Nothing will stop me from taking the gold! Anything less and Josee will throw another tantrum.

[Confessional Ends]

Jacques walks across the sand and takes his place beside Jen – the twins still missing.

Chris: “Well, if this is the entertaining competitors we're getting, I can't wait to see who our final racer is!” McLean says with a bright smile. “Ok, last but certainly not least ...”

He flips the file to the last page as he finally takes a look, only to visibly deflate.

“... Seriously?”

Chef leans across and takes a glance at the file. “Guess Don wasn't too thrilled with you throwing Leonard onto him.”

“Never mention that name again …” Chris grumbles, tacking a loud sigh on to the end. “Fine then, last and certainly least, friends with a fake wizard and just as delusional, here's Tammy …”

Tammy appears at the door to the helicopter, throwing up a handful of rose-pink confetti up in the air, to basically zero reaction or fanfare. The dedicated LARPer remains clad in her Viking inspired gear, complete with horned helmet and studded leather gauntlets. There is the addition of some markings and symbols along her otherwise bare arms, plus some also adorning her outfit – although how authentic they are remains to be seen.

[Outhouse Confessional – Sugar]

“That Chris don't know what he's saying, Leonard ain't no fake,” Sugar pouts, before adding in a grumpy mutter. “Non-magic believer ruining reality.”

As it is, it doesn't take long for her to perk up as she reacts like a lightbulb has gone off in her head.

“Hopefully the new girl knows magic too. That way she can magic me to the final round of this here pageant and the tiara I rightfully deserve.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional - Tammy]

“With the aid of my magical friend, I made sure to enchant myself and my gear to offer the protection I need to face the hardships of this adventure,” Tammy explains as she gestures a symbol drawn on her gauntlet – a shield that upon closer inspection seems quite wonky – before pointing to a three-leaf clover and a shooting star drawn onto her arm. “See? A greater enchantment of shielding, a rune of luck, and a charm of heavenly wisdom.”

She gives a confident smirk to the camera as she pulls out her sky blue ocarina.

“Coupled with a few new spells and my legendary Temporal Ocarina,” she holds aloft her 'magical artefact', “the haul of the ancient dragon's lair will be mine!”

Another handful of confetti is thrown up before she starts playing the instrument, a few off notes getting in before the camera lens cracks.

[Confessional Ends]

Tammy walks up and stands next to Jacques and Jen as they join the contestants, with the Adversity Twins joining in from the other direction – Jay sniffling into a tissue and Mickey whimpering as he scratches his arm and neck.

“Can't lie, that last one was kind of a bummer,” Chris glumly complains. “Way to end the newbies intros … Could really do with something to lift my spirits-”

He is cut off by the ringtone of his phone, the host pausing to quickly – and desperately – answer.

“Yeah, McLean here.” A pause. “Finally! It's about time!” He hangs up and turns back around. “If you'll all turn your attention to the incoming boat.”

The cast turn to see one last boat sailing in, with a couple of interns stepping forwards to the end of the docks. As the ship pulls in and sets its anchor down, the interns climb aboard the lowered gangplank.

“This to do with the first challenge?” queries Jo.

“Not quite. See, since it's been so long since we've had many of you back, the producers and myself were a little concerned that some of the drama and angst between you all would have diminished. So, we made sure to pull out all the stops to bring in contestants that could light a fire under several of you.”

Many look at Chris with confusion and a little apprehension as the camera pans across, coming to a stop on B. He shares much the same expression as the others, though he looks away as he notices Dawn's rather rigid poise as she stares at the vessel. A tap on her shoulder breaks her concentration on the craft as she turns to the silent genius, who raises an eyebrow in way of a quiet question.

“There's a presence radiating off the ship, B,” Dawn answers his unspoken question. “I sense an oppressive shroud over that vessel. As if a malign blackness is at work ...” she trails off as she squints in her reading, … and yet also faint touches of a great ache.”

Upon hearing Dawn's reading, some of the contestants around her suddenly look a lot more worried, with Chris' expression becoming all that more satisfied. At the top of the gangplank, the two interns start to wheel down a figure strapped onto a hand truck.

“Introducing the psychopathic brainiac willing to let an island blow up with everyone on it, it's Scarlett!

The interns turn the hand truck to face the contestants, with the Pahkitew Island contestants looking particularly shocked. Scarlett is strung up like Hannibal Lecter – complete with straitjacket and muzzle – her untied red hair strung out wild and glowing red eyes shooting daggers at everyone.

“What the hell?!” shouts Sky.

“What is that c**t doing here?!” Jasmine shouts, the censors quickly beeping out the particular curse that causes Chris to cringe.

“Kinda pushing the censors with that one … This isn't Australia, Jasmine.”

“I don't care! She was going to fucking kill us!”

“Yeah, man. What made you think bringing her back would be a good idea?” pipes up Shawn, backing up his girlfriend.

“Frankly, your reactions already prove how fantastic a decision it was,” Chris points out.

Everyone focuses back onto Scarlett only to see her eyes practically screaming a manic smile as she gets wheeled off to the side away from the others.

“I-Is the muzzle really necessary?” Cody stammers.

“Considering her mental state during her previous outing, I'd say it is a necessary precaution,” answers Brick in a hushed tone, though not quiet enough to avoid Jasmine's ear.

“It doesn't go far enough ...” she grumbles.

“Really?” Cody looks uncertain.

Noah leans in and whispers, “Do you think that'd stop your crazy stalker?”

Cody looks over to Sierra who is one of the few who looks rather unfazed by the situation, instead looking down on the object of her affection with adoration.

“Ok, I see the point.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Brick]

“Yes, I watched the previous seasons to gather intel. Information is the greatest weapon a soldier can have. I can't say I was prepared for how far Scarlett was willing to go for the million. Still, should she find herself looking to strike like that again, I am willing to charge into the enemy fire for the sake of my comrades.”

Brick punctuates that with a proud salute.

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Jasmine]

Jasmine is still seething as she scowls towards the camera. Her hat is unusually off her head, instead gripping the brim tightly in both hands.

“If that devil tries to hurt anyone again, I will rip her bloody head off!” she snarls, inadvertently wringing her hat in the process. Her grip loosens as she notices what it is she's doing. “Shit ...”

The Aussie lays her now somewhat crumpled hat on her long legs and tries to smooth out the creases. After a few pats and rubs she puts it back on her head, though it does sit a tad off kilter. She readjusts it with a sigh, before resting her head in her palm.

“The producers have completely lost the plot …”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Scarlett]

Scarlett remains heavily restrained in front of the confessional cam, cackling maniacally. While the muzzle does a little to muffle the sound of her laughter. Rather than trying to say anything, she just continues to cackle for the entire time the confessional runs, right up till it cuts to static.

[Confessional Ends]

The sound of footsteps walking across the dock mixed with the jangling of chains brings everyone's attention from Scarlett back to the boat. Appearing at the top of the gangplank is a greying male police officer leading forwards someone in a jumpsuit whose head is covered up with a black rag, a female officer following closely behind.

“Last, but certainly not least, the destructive delinquent and the only player in TD history to make the merge four times!” the host introduces, raising four fingers up to the camera. “Welcome back, Duncan!”

The rag is pulled off his head to reveal it is indeed the delinquent, looking a little worse for wear from his time in prison. A few cuts and small bruises litter his face, while he is also sporting an extra piercing on his ear. A rough unshaven stubble clings to his jawline, while his hair has grown out. Rather than the short cut with the green mohawk he once had, he now has a mop of black hair with tinges of green still coating his tips and the occasional streak through his mane.

The collective expression from the majority campers – particularly the original cast and the All Stars additions – is one of shock, though none more so than Courtney and Gwen as they both scream, “WHAT?!”

[Outhouse Confessional – Gwen]

“Okay, maybe I could've had a chance to finally patch things up with Courtney and move on. But Duncan?!” Gwen groans and hugs her knees, resting her head against them. “This is going to be a nightmare … “

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Courtney]

Courtney can't be seen in the confessional, but can certainly be heard screaming as a cacophony of destruction is heard, the very outhouse shaking from whatever destruction she is unleashing in her emotional turmoil.

[Confessional Ends]

“What is he doing here?!” Courtney screams as she shakily points towards the delinquent.

“Yeah, weren't you in jail?” the goth adds.

“He just got put on parole,” McLean explains. “Our treat, really. Once you two were drafted, I knew we had to bring Duncan back. So we pulled a few strings.”

Duncan just stands there with his pierced eyebrow raised as the officers unlock the cuffs on his wrists and ankles, before looping up the chains. No longer restrained, he gives his wrists a little rub and twist before folding his arms across his chest, stepping past his police escort.

“Not like I'm entirely thrilled to be here either, princess.”

“Don't call me that!” his exes glower at him simultaneously, only to then look at each other in surprise. “Huh?”

Chris can't help but laugh at their reactions. “Yeah, I knew this was going to be great!”

“Uh, Chris? Isn't it dangerous to have two criminals competing on the show?” Sky asks, having raised her hand yet querying anyway. Her question gets a flat look from Duncan, while Scarlett just fixes her gaze on the gymnast.

“Already way ahead of you. But, let's all head to the campgrounds first.”

They all start to head off. Duncan looks to follow at the back of the pack, though he stops as he gets a hand on his shoulder from the male officer.

“Keep your head, alright?” he checks with a low rumbling voice. “I don't want to see you back there.”

Duncan breathes out a sigh through his nose before giving him a nod. “Don't worry, Warden. I know.”

----------

The campers follow Chris into the camp area, with a pair of interns still needing to wheel Scarlett around. They come to a stop in the space between the dining hall and three massive white tarps covering up some rather large somethings – with one being far larger than the other two.

“As you're all well aware, except maybe the five newbies, the game is the same as normal,” the host begins his explanation. “Compete in teams to complete the challengers, the winners get rewards, the losers get to send someone home at the campfire ceremony. You also get the good old comforts of Chef Hatchet's expert cooking, along with the old faithful outhouse confessional.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Duncan]

The delinquent cringes and brings an arm over his mouth as he retches.

“What, did McLean get Owen to stew in here after a truckload of beans to get this rotten stink?” he complains, waving a hand in front of his nose. “This smells worse than being in right after him and, honestly, I'd prefer that. At least I'd get to see the big guy …”

[Confessional Ends]

“But, we also have a few new amenities to make things interesting. For one, there's a couple of new confessionals dotted around the islands.”

[Kitchen Confessional – Chris]

“Such as the one here in Chef's kitchen,” he adds on, the cut working seamlessly.

McLean is standing in the kitchen, leaning against the kitchen bench-top that the camera has been placed upon. A couple of dirty pots are stacked up in the corner of the shot next to a half-filled sack – the contents of which are unknown. In the background the saloon-style doors can be seen, along with the servery window to the dining hall.

“Pros, it'll be hard for anyone to spy on you with Chef Hatchet maintaining watch over his domain. Cons, you have to contend with Chef Hatchet getting you out of his domain.”

He ducks as a large cleaver is thrown over his head, Chris looking to the side as a dull thud is heard off camera.

“See what I mean?”

Chef can be heard growling as some loud stomps sound out, with the host looking over with some fear.

“AHHH!”

Chris dives out of the way as a boiling pot is tossed at him right as the scene cuts to static.

[Confessional Ends]

“Secondly, we'll be taking a page out of World Tour and splitting you up into three teams,” McLan continues. “Not only will the losing team be sending someone home, but they'll also have to stay in the crummy old cabins from Total Drama past.”

The white tarp closest to the dining hall gets pulled off by a group of interns, revealing the old looking cabin – the doors to the two sides barely being held on the hinges.

“They will also be stuck with the communal bathrooms for any of their needs, unless they'd rather go outside.” he chuckles at that, with a few of the more self-concerned campers looking a bit grossed out. “Teams finishing second will get an upgraded accommodation – a new log cabin.”

A larger group of interns – thanks in part to the interns unveiling the original cabin joining in – pull off the tarp, revealing a well crafted and rather beautiful log cabin, sporting a solid balcony and a single door. The campers on screen all look impressed at the sight. The camera cuts inside to show a common room with two doors at the far end, a fire pit within a stone ring, a couple of tables, shelves and lounges around the fire pit and a black metal cone chimney suspended above. A voice-over of the host continues as the shot lingers.

“This log cabin comes complete with a well furnished common room leading to the two sleeping quarters which each have an ensuite.”

“The show finally decided to spend money on us?” Justin asks as the camera cuts back to the cast.

“Yeah, don't get too comfortable with that. You can thank Dakota's father for making these changes part of the deal.”

The camera focuses on the heiress as she looks down the feed with a wave. “Thanks, daddy!”

“That said, even I'm a little jealous about where the winning teams will be staying.”

They all turn to the largest surprise, where all the interns have gathered together along with Chef on his jeep. Chef drives forwards pulling along a few ropes tied to the tarp, as all the other interns pull off the tarp to show a rather luxurious cottage-style manor, three stories tall and even larger than the McLean Spa Hotel from All Stars.

“Meet the McLean Spa Deluxe Hotel! Complete with two butlers, a laundry, a ten-person hot tub and sauna, air-conditioning, a gym, 24-hour masseuses, fully kitted out kitchen and a games room, plus plenty of bedrooms. Still not quite as good as the cottage I'll be staying at, but hey. Not too shabby, if I do say so myself.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Courtney]

“He better not be calling anything like where he stayed in All Stars a cottage!” the Type A shouts. “For the last time, it was a mansion!”

She does pause at the end of that, humming a little as she thinks.

“Maybe we could trick Duncan into blowing it up again? Get rid of two birds with one stone.”

[Confessional Switches – Outhouse Confessional – Sugar]

“Now that's the kinda place a beautiful queen like me should be stayin'!” she boasts, pointing both thumbs towards herself. “Whatever teammates I get better be good at their competin', or else I'll make sure they're gone faster than a greased pig on a mudslide.”

[Confessional Ends]

“And finally, without further ado, let's put you into your teams for the foreseeable future. If I call your name, come over and stand here by my left.”

He gestures to his left before starting to rattle off the list, the camera focusing on each individual when their name is called.

“B.” The genius gives little reaction to his name being called.

“Cody.” Cody looks a little nervous.

“Sky.” The wannabe Olympian wears a small smile.

“Amy.” She wears a haughty smirk as she runs a hand through her bangs.

“Samey.” The camera widens from Amy to then show Sammy, with the mean twin growling and stomping on her sister's foot.

“Alejandro.” The son of a diplomat gives a little wink to the camera.

“Brick.” Sergeant McArthur brings his hand up in a salute.

“Jen.” The fashionista blows a kiss.

“Sugar.” Sugar hollers and tries to blow a kiss to the camera too, though it speeds away from her before she can complete it.

“And Justin.” The male model gives a wink and a smile to the camera, his teeth bringing a bright sparkle.

They walk over together into a group, as Chris holds out a rolled up green piece of fabric.

“From here on, you are the Sacrosanct Snakes!” he reveals, throwing the fabric to Brick. It unfurls to reveal a flag containing their team logo – a coiled snake with a halo above its head radiating an aura”

“Sir, yes sir!” Brick salutes, the removed hand making the flag curl in slightly, before B steps in and holds it out straight again.

“The next group of you can come and stand by my right.”

“Shawn.” The apocalypse prepper fiddles with the hem of his beanie.

“Jay.” Jay gets a little jittery as he bites his fingernails, small cuttings of which fly away from his fingers.

“Mickey.” Jay suddenly looks relieved with the camera panning out to catch the same relief on both brothers' faces upon the announcement they'll be on the same team. The two of them share a hug before breaking apart, still keeping an arm around each other's shoulders.

“Gwen.” Gwen closes her eyes and crosses her fingers.

“Jo.” She crosses her arms and holds herself proudly.

“Lightning.” Jo's proud poise ends abruptly as she scowls at Lightning, the uber-jock glaring right back at her.

“Cameron.” Cameron looks a little nervous, that trepidation doubling as he realises Lightning has broken off of his stand-off with Jo to glare at the former bubble boy.

“Eva.” The stuntwoman rolls her eyes at the antics of her team members.

“Sierra.” Sierra looks down at her feet as the bottom of her lip quivers.

“And Scarlett.” Shawn jumps a little at Scarlett's mention, while the redhead's reaction is masked up.

Like the Snakes, they all come together in a group – Scarlett being wheeled over by interns. Sierra sends a forlorn look over towards Cody on the separate team. Chris has in his hands a rolled up gold fabric. Jay and Mikey glance around nervously at most of their teammates, specifically the jocks and Scarlett.

“From here on, you will be the Pugnacious Panthers!”

Lightning is thrown the golden flag, unfurled to reveal two panthers taking swipes at one another.

“The What Panthers?” Jo asks, looking a bit confused – though not as much as Lightning.

“Pugnacious. Meaning quick to argue or fight,” Cameron explains as he readjusts his glasses by the frame.

Shawn nods and narrows his eyes towards Scarlett. “Yeah, I can see that.” Scarlett just rolls her eyes.

“And for the rest of you; Jasmine.” The concerned Aussie looks towards her boyfriend.

“Dawn.” Like B, the moonchild barely gives any reaction.

“Tammy.” The LARPer looks over her ocarina, giving it a little shake.

“Noah.” The snarker looks fairly unimpressed.

“Courtney.” Courtney has her eyes clenched shut as she repeats a mantra to herself, trying to keep herself calm. It doesn't seem like it's working too well.

“DJ.” The gentle giant anxiously looks around him.

“Scott.” Scott frowns at the host and growls a little, though he ends up glancing in Courtney's direction and quickly looking away.

“Dakota.” Dakota gives a bright smile and a finger wave to the camera before blowing a kiss.

“Jacques.” The Olympian beams and looks down the camera, bouncing his eyebrow up enticingly.

“and Duncan.” the delinquent glowers at the host. “Bunch up now.”

They do as he says, with Courtney fixing Duncan with a look and trying to keep herself as far away from Duncan as she can. That is, until she realises she's next to Scott and moves around again. Chris has in his hands a furled up red flag.

“Your team will be the Recalcitrant Rabbits!”

DJ catches the flag and opens it up, showing off the logo as two rabbits butting heads.

“What's a re … re-recalcitrant anyway?” Dakota asks.

“Uncooperative, particularly towards discipline and authority,” Noah rattles off before looking at Chris. “Did someone buy a thesaurus or something?”

“We wanted something a bit more unusual to alliterate the animals. Plus, you can't say they don't fit, right?”

Noah looks over his own team, before giving the same observations to the other two, finally settling with a shrug. “Guess so.”

“Uh, Chris?” Courtney speaks up with her hand raised. “Is there any way that Duncan can be put on a different team? I'd rather not be on the same team as a convicted criminal!”

“Yeah, same here with Scarlett. No way do I want to be with someone who was going to kill me,” Shawn adds in, though the two named competitors don't react much to their protests – not even Duncan to the venomous stress Courtney spat his name out with.

“Why bring them back anyway?” queries Gwen. Chris opens his mouth to answer, although he gets cut off completely by Sierra.

“Drama and ratings, why else would Chris and the producers do anything?” she notes. “BTW, your reactions are just proving to them that they were correct to do so.”

“Right you are, Sierra,” McLean nods. “But, considering the considerable dangers these two could present with their destructive ways, the producers did draft up some extra special rules for them on top of the general rules for disqualification that everyone abides by. If they break any of them, they'll not only be immediately removed from the competition, but also sent straight back to whichever facility they were pulled out of.”

“And these special rules are?” Scott jumps in.

“For me to know and you to find out. Can't have anyone forcing them into breaking a rule.”

The dirt farmer snaps his fingers and grumbles to himself, “There goes that plan ...”

“Of course, maybe we could be persuaded to tell you all …” the host proposes, a lot of the campers perking up at this. “However, if we were to do that, then anyone who even remotely pressures either of them into breaking a rule – should they do so – would also be immediately eliminated. It would be quite a shame if that's how you lost out on winning five million dollars. So, anyone game?”

The ones who had perked up appear far more hesitant to take the deal now, everyone remaining silent with only a few like Courtney and Scott putting up an annoyed front.

“Suit yourself. Oh, speaking of rules, we may as well go over this now. Since we're under Canadian law, because you're all nineteen and over, you can all legally drink and consent. However, there's going to be very few opportunities for drinking out here – unless it's a challenge. So, go easy on it.”

There are a few disappointed looks from some of the cast at this, from Duncan, Jasmine and – surprisingly – Courtney in particular.

“Also, no sex outside the cabins or any applicable sleeping quarters.” the host continues. “We don't need to be cutting around that. In the quarters is fine-ish, just try not to make it a habit. We still have split quarters for a reason. Unless you don't mind having an audience there.”

Quite a lot of faces turn varying shades of red at this.

“Do we really need to go over this?” Eva questions, being one of the ones not as reactive to that in comparison.

“Legal wants me to make sure you all know. Lastly, while you are older, this brand does still attract a younger audience and still has a prime-time spot. So, while we can allow some curses and swears, try to keep it to a minimum. And that particular word you Aussies keep in your vernacular is off limits, Jasmine. You'll get away with a warning for earlier.”

[Outhouse Confessional – Jasmine]

“Honestly, it's not like I use it often. Hell, a lot of us Aussies don't. The amount of usage the 'c-word' gets depends on where you are.”

She does pause a little as she rubs the back of her neck. “Admittedly, where I'm from is a bit freer with its use than other parts, but I try not to use it. It just slipped out 'cause I was angry.”

[Confessional Ends]

“So, is everyone happy?”

A few hands still go up, notably from Courtney, Duncan and Amy, plus a couple others lost in the mass of bodies.

“Good,” Chris smiles, completely ignoring them. “Now get your things and get changed into whatever you're comfortable getting wet in. Your first challenge may look a tad familiar …”

DJ's eyes go wide as he seizes up. “No, please … Not that!”

The camera cuts to the cast standing in their respective swimwear on a beach before a lake, with a steep rise to a large cliff in the background.

“NOOOOOOOO!” the mama's boy screams, dropping to his knees and getting a delighted chuckle from McLean.

“It's good to be back,” he says before looking down the camera. “How will our campers fare with their first challenge? Will anyone go splat? Which team will fall flat? And who will be the first one to be voted off? All those answers and more next time on Total Drama: Destination Stardom!”

----------

A/N: Well, what do you think?

While it's not completely necessary right now, I will be putting in a running elimination order when they come through, plus I might also put down who voted for who. Don't think I'll go over the why in notes. If it's needed, it'll be addressed in story. Although, something that does need to be put down now, the teams:

Sacrosanct Snakes: B, Cody, Sky, Amy, Sammy, Alejandro, Brick, Jen, Sugar and Justin

Pugnacious Panthers: Shawn, Gwen, Jo, Lightning, Cameron, Jay, Mickey, Eva, Sierra and Scarlett

Recalcitrant Rabbits: Jasmine, Dawn, Noah, Courtney, DJ, Scott, Jacques, Tammy, Dakota and Duncan

Fun fact, I used a randomiser to get the teams. The idea was I would randomise it till I got close to what parameters I wanted, and then tweak it to get the rest. I ended up using the first random set I got. It was so close to being perfect. All that needed tweaking was getting Amy and Sammy on the same team (yes, I know), and that ended up splitting up Jasmine and Shawn, though both ended up on different teams to where they started. Duncan and Courtney also somehow managed to be on the same team every time I randomised the list. It was outrageous.

Another small fun fact, this was originally only going to have 24 contestants. At least until I realised I really wanted to have both Jay and Mickey in this. That then bumped it up to 27, but then looking over it I noticed I didn't really have many who stood out as early boots, so another three were added to be cannon fodder. Doesn't mean they won't have an arc, just that it may be a short one.

Anyway, like I said, feel free to let me know your thoughts, any suggestions or criticisms you may have. I'm more than happy to talk and respond to questions, though I will try to keep things spoiler-free. At the very least, I will try to ask you all one question each chapter, along with one very over-arching question per chapter. Both will be the same for this introduction; Who do you think will win? Who're you gonna root for? Who's it gonna be?

I don't currently have a schedule. I will try to get the next one out soon, though I could end up making a schedule where I go between this and one of my Pokémon fanfics (probably Forgotten But Not Gone). So please wait patiently. If nothing else, I don't think I'll manage to get chapters out quite as long as this one was; this is the longest chapter I've ever written after all.

Finally, if you're interested to see more, you can find me over on YouTube, FanFiction and AO3. FFN and AO3 are more for story upload while YouTube is me gaming, though I may go into fantasy writing/booking scenarios and possibly audio roleplays as well. Who knows? Either way, they're all under Thorongil82, so by all means check 'em out.

Anyway, that should be all for now. Until next time, folks!

[borahaerhy]

Love and Sarcasm (1) - knj

Summary: The second semester of your sophomore year in college has started and there are only two people in your creative writing class that have published works: You, and Kim Namjoon; a pretentious know-it-all that just so happens to be in the same frat as your best friend.

Pairing: Fuckboy!Namjoon x Demi!Chubby!Reader

Genre: Enemies to Lovers, Slow Burn, College! au, eventual smut

Warnings: Namjoon is toxic, Jimin drinks some wine before driving but he's not intoxicated, College parties, the entirety of bts being in a frat, Y/n has a caffeine addiction, references to Jimin and Y/n partying a lot while underage.

Word count: 5.6k

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Note: Hey guys! I decided to make it a mini series, It should be 4-5 parts because I wasn't even half done and we were almost at 15k words so I decided I should split it up xD. I hope you enjoy :))

“There’s my favorite librarian,” You looked up from the cart of books you had been organizing and at your best friend of almost 10 years, holding a large coffee that you desperately hoped was for you.  

“Did you get me the good stuff?” You asked as he handed you the cup, rolling his eyes as your eyes rolled back into your head as the hot bitter liquid met your tongue.  

“Of course, I also got you a donut because coffee isn’t breakfast,” you gasp at his bold statement clutching your chest as exaggeratedly as you could muster.  

“Says who?” You question as you gently set your coffee down on your desk, features still exaggerated 

“Most people, I’m pretty sure. Eat the damn thing; and next time you wake up late ask someone else to get your coffee for you, I have shit to do,” he dropped the bag with the donut in it on your desk as you resumed organizing the books.  

“Where have you got to be before 4pm?” You scoff, eyeing your friend out of the corner of your eye as he yawns.  

“I’ll have you know,” he speaks through his yawn, “That my classes are early this semester. My first ones at 10,” You give a slight smirk as you shake your head lightly.  

“Wow, look at you up and out of the house a whole 2 hours before you have to be anywhere – if I didn’t see it I wouldn’t believe it,” he narrows his eyes at you even though you weren’t even close to facing him.  

“Haha, very funny. When are your classes for this semester?” He questions, sliding his hands into the pockets of his winter jacket.  

“Uh, my Monday, Wednesday, Friday classes start at 9, so I should actually probably leave here soon. I have creative writing then at 2, I have one of the 40 English classes I have to take. Tuesdays and Thursdays are just Child Development which starts at noon,” You furrow your eyebrows, struggling to remember your new schedule off the top of your head.  

“That English class, is it with Duncan?” You look over at him before nodding, picking up your coffee with one hand and placing the other on your hip as you take a sip. “Thank god, you know I hate reading, you’re going to be my lifeline, my little nerdy friend,” You cock an eyebrow at his mention of the word little.  

“Jimin, we’re the same height, and I think I’ve got a few pounds on you, please stop calling me little,” you set down your coffee and look down at the sheet for the books that are due back today and start crossing off a few that had already been returned.  

“I meant more figuratively. You’re emotionally 5’2,” You roll your eyes, a small smile creeping through you try to hide. “I need to get going, I have to meet up with the frat before I get to classes today,”  

“Still can’t believe they let you into a frat,” you stood up straight again, taking one last sip of your coffee before you pushed the cart of books out from behind your desk.  

“Still can’t believe you refuse to come to my frat parties.”  

“Can you seriously see me going to a frat party?” You asked, almost laughing at the thought. Jimin nodded.  

“I have actually physically seen you at several frat parties, Y/n,”  

“Yeah, in high school,” He shrugged as he started walking backwards toward the front door.  

“I’m just saying, I’ve seen the party girl in you, babe. Don’t pretend she doesn’t exist anymore – she was hot,” you rolled your eyes as he pulled his hat back down over his ears before stepping out into the cold.  

- 

You made your way to the back of the large lecture room, sitting in the back row next to a very large window that overlooked the snow-covered campus. You placed your 2nd coffee of the day down on your desk before sitting down, satisfied with your view of the board in front of you. It wasn’t a large class, so by the time everyone else had made their way in, you were still the only person in the back row.  

“Good morning class, my name is Helen Swain, and I’ll be your professor for this semester,” She went on for a few more minutes, talking about what was going to be covered in the class and what to expect, even handing out a paper syllabus before announcing that she expected physical copies of all of your assignments. Looks like it’s time to invest in a printer.  

“And I just have one more thing to announce before we get started. As this is a creative writing class, I thought it would be nice to highlight some of your classmates that have their very own published works! To the two who have their work published, would you please stand and tell us a little bit about it?” Your heart sunk as you reluctantly stood up, one other student a few rows ahead of you standing up as well. All eyes fell to him first.  

“Young man in the front, why don’t you tell us a bit about yours?” He nodded and clasped his hands together.  

“Yes, of course. It was a deep and very meaningful poem I wrote when I lost someone who was very close to me. My high school English teacher actually turned it in to a competition where it won first prize and got published,” The professor smiled widely as she began to clap, the rest of the class joining awkwardly as he sat down.  

“That sounds wonderful, I’m glad you had a teacher in high school that saw your talent,” she paused for a moment, turning her gaze to meet you, your hands awkwardly shoved into the pocket of your oversized hoodie. “And what about you, in the back?” All eyes were now on you, but thankfully you were seated much higher up than all of them, so you could largely ignore them.  

“Um, it’s called Sarcastic, and it’s an acrostic of the word sarcastic, that I wrote when I was 15 and turned in to a competition because I had to for a grade, and apparently it was just edgy enough to make the cut,” A couple of the students laughed, not that you minded – it’s hardly impressive and extremely funny that it had even happened. The boy who went first seemed to think it was absolutely hilarious, though.  

“Well, you must’ve been extremely talented to have written something so well at such a young age,” You smirked lightly and gave a thumbs up as you sat down, without any applause.  

She continued on with teaching, the class relatively uneventful as it was only the first day, but you still had an assignment due on Friday: a fictional piece of at least 5,000 words. You wrote down the assignment in your planner that you only ever used the first week or so of new classes, then completely disregarded the rest of the semester, before getting up and walking out of class with everyone else, tossing your long empty cup in the trash on the way out.  

With the hour you had between classes, you decided to go to the schools café and get yourself an iced coffee to have a little variety. From there, you made your way to where you knew Jimin would be getting out of his lecture shortly and want to rant about something before he had to go sit through another 4-hour lecture.  

“Looks like people will probably come to me for help,” you turn behind you, feet still moving in the general direction of when you needed to go before you turned back around as he caught up to you. “No offense, I just think my poem seemed a little more impressive than yours,” You hummed in agreement as you nodded, taking a sip of your coffee as you watched the smirk on his face grow confused.  

“No, that’s good, actually, because I really hate it when random people come up to me and start talking about thing’s they generally know nothing about,” you both stopped walking, now turned to face one another as you took another sip of your coffee before slapping him on the shoulder. “So, thanks for that, bud.”  

You turned and continued walking to Jimin’s classroom, which thankfully was right down the hallway from where your next class was going to be. “Oh my god I almost fell asleep like 20 times, who knew philosophy was so boring?” Jimin whined the second he was out of the classroom, causing you to snicker.  

“Literally everyone, Jiminie,” you smiled as he linked arms with yours as you started slowly walking down the hall to your next subject.  

“You like it,” he shot back as you shrugged.  

“Because I’m boring Jimin, c’mon man, wake up!” You snapped in front of his face as you aggressively told him to wake up, sipping your coffee before he noticed you had a new coffee in your hands.  

“That’s not the same coffee I bought you this morning, Y/n, and did you even eat your donut?” You scoffed.  

“Of course I ate my donut that you so graciously bought me, what kind of a person only drinks coffee all day and has their first meal at 7pm?”  

His expression fell as you turned to face each other outside of your class, his arms now folded across his chest. “You, asshole, that’s why I asked,” Granted, you had thrown the donut away after only having one bite; it was way too sweet too early in the morning. And he most certainly did not have the right to judge you on your coffee habits.  

“Well, new year new me, Jiminie. I'll have you know I'll be eating food along with my ten cups of coffee a day,” you smiled, entering the classroom.  

“Can you at least narrow it down to seven cups?” He followed you to the back of the room, the only acceptable place to sit.  

“Never.”  

- 

After class, Jimin walked you home and then invited himself inside of your quaint apartment, plopping himself down on your couch before you could even finish getting your winter jacket off.  

“So, what’re you going to wear to my party on Friday?” you scowl at him as you kick your shoes off, dropping your bag next to them before you cross your arms, moving over to where he’d occupied a large amount of your sofa before you squeeze in next to him.  

“Who says I’m going to your party?” You retort, Jimin’s smirk never fading from his face.  

“Me,” he spoke proudly, as if he’d just found a loophole in the system that forced you out of your house. He has not.  

“Friday you said?” you ask, narrowing your eyes as he nodded as if in deep thought, pondering your options, before you shook your head and moved your eyes back to meet his. “Sorry, can’t, that cuts into my brooding time. Maybe if it were on a Tuesday–”  

“You’re hilarious, you know?” He asked sarcastically after rolling his eyes. You nod.  

“Duh,” his face softened as he turned to face you, grabbing your hand in the process.  

“Seriously, Y/n, I think you might actually have fun if you come,” he elongated his words as he tugged on your hand slightly, his bottom lip jutted out as he begged. You rolled your eyes, trying to pull your hand back out of his grasp but he wouldn’t let you. “C’mon, babe, I've been trying to not push you, but you seriously need to get laid,” You immediately pull the pillow that you had been resting on out from behind your back before hitting Jimin as hard as you could with it, causing him to let go of you and chuckle, hands hiding his face as you swung a second time before propping the pillow back behind your back.  

“Asshole,” You started, gaining his attention, “You know I’m an emotional bitch that can only sleep with people I’m in love with, we can’t all be sluts,” he chuckled softly at your words, rubbing the arm you hit as if it was a serious wound.  

“Well then you need to go make out with someone or at least, I don’t know, get drunk and relax. I can’t remember the last time you just chilled the fuck out and had fun, ” his face became more somber as he spoke, trying not to sound like he was worried but still wanted you to know that he cared.  

“If you wont come for you then come for me, the only people I hang out with at these things are fuckboys and they’re not near as fun as you. I promise I won’t leave you halfway through the night to be slutty either, I’m all yours if you agree to be my arm candy for the night,” You groaned loudly as he finished his sentence, making him stop because you know he would keep talking if you didn’t stop him.  

“Can we find a new topic of conversation if I agree to think about it?”  

“Only if you agree to think about what you’ll be wearing to the party you’ll definitely be coming to,” he smiled, his round cheeks hiding his eyes as his grin spread across his face. You sighed, sitting back up before grabbing the remote.  

“Fine, I’ll go to your frat party, Jimin. Now, do you want to watch Harry Potter with me or not?” You asked, turning the tv on.  

“Of course, I’ll order the pizza.”  

- 

The week went by much faster than you would’ve liked it to, between working and getting used to the long class hours. You had finished the writing assignment due for your creative writing class on Wednesday; you had always been an overachiever when it came to writing assignments that you had free reign on, so it’s a bit longer than necessary as well, but you figured that would help your grade, if anything.  

You thankfully didn’t have to go into the library this morning, so you were able to get an extra couple of hours of sleep before you decided to walk to campus, seeing as it had snowed last night and it was beautiful outside. You, obviously, picked a hot black coffee on your way, the hot cup warming the fingertips your fingerless gloves neglected before you finally made your way to the large building your lecture was in.  

Having an extra few minutes before your professor would even open the door, you slid your bag off your shoulder and set it down on a bench near the entrance of the building. You opened it, putting your coffee down next to it as you realized opening a zipper is hard to do with one hand, and pulled out your assignment, wanting to be able to hand it to her before you even took your seat.  

You absentmindedly scrolled through your phone for a few minutes before you started to notice a few of your classmates walking in the building. You put your phone away, picked up your things before you went along with them.  

“Ah, Ms. Y/l/n and Mr. Kim, the two paper’s I'm most excited to read,” You turned and realized that Namjoon was right behind you, smile wide as he held his paper out at the same time you did. You both took notice of the fact yours was longer, by at least a few pages, before you both started walking to your seats.  

“Quality over quantity, Y/l/n,” he spoke lowly as he stepped quickly to keep up with you. You smirked.  

“Hmm,” you hummed, taking a sip of your coffee before turning, facing him as he threw his bag down on the table. “Hasn’t anyone told you, Kim? Size always matters,” you turned on your heal and walked up to your seat that overlooked the class, satisfied with the baffled look that was on his face when you left.  

- 

“Okay, I know I'm basically forcing you to come to this party, but that doesn’t mean you can just wear your work clothes,” It was 30 seconds after you had walked into your apartment after taking some overtime in at the library, and Jimin was already in your apartment, drinking a glass of wine with his hand on his hip as he looked at you judgmentally.  

“Did you bring your own wine glass to wait for me in my apartment to get off work so that you can scold me for not being ready 4 seconds after I walk in the door?” You cocked an eyebrow as you cross your arms across your chest, but Jimin only looks at you and nods as if that’s obvious and completely normal. You rolled your eyes as you put your things down, shedding yourself of your winter coat, gloves and hat before you walked past Jimin, taking the glass of wine from his hand and taking a sip as you walked back to your bedroom. “Besides, what’s wrong with looking like a librarian?”  

“We’re going to a frat party, not a book sale,” He scoffs, following you into your room and taking his wine back from you as you open your closet and begin to think, piecing different things together.  

“No shit, Jiminie. You just have to give me a second to get ready,” you pause, pulling a mini skirt out of your closet, looking around to see if there was any way you could pair this with something without freezing your tits off. “If someone drugs my drink it’s entirely your fault for making me look hot,” You pulled out a tight cropped sweater with a zipper down the front, holding them up together to see if they went well together. They did.  

“If someone drugs your drink, I’ll murder them,” he said nonchalantly as you heard him opening your dresser drawer. “And if you’re wearing that, you’ll need these,” He throws a pair of fishnets over the hanger of the top before he begins rifling through your shoes.  

“Well, while you figure out my outfit for me, I’ll go do my makeup,” he merely grunted and waved you off as he set his wine next to him, throwing your converse across the room.  

- 

“You’re going to catch a cold without a jacket, babe,” Jimin walked you out of your apartment and down to the street, where you had to then try to find his car in the snow-covered and cramped parking lot with your arm linked with his. You were now at least a good few centimeters taller than him, your chunky knee-high heels barely giving you enough traction to stay vertical as you walked through the ice.

“That’s what the coffee’s for, Jimin. It makes my heart beat so fast my body temperature never drops below 100 degrees,” you smiled as you walked unaffected by the temperature to his car, which was conveniently parked at the end of the lot. He opened the door for you before racing to the driver’s side and jumped in.  

“Joking about your coffee addiction isn’t making me feel much better about it, Y/n,” you only smiled as he started the car and drove the short distance between your apartment and his house. It was massive. You’ve never been inside, but you’ve seen the outside of it many times. Between Jimin being overprotective of you and you not really liking to party anymore, he just always came over to your place when you wanted to hang out.  

But now as you looked up at the large house that was already blaring music with people pouring into it, you started to get intimidated, almost wishing you’d gone to at least one of these things before so this didn’t seem so daunting.  

Before you could even unbuckle your seatbelt, Jimin had your door open, hand extended to help you get out. You quickly unbuckled yourself and stood, taking Jimin’s arm as you walked up to the house, walking right in the front door into the living room swimming with already drunk people dancing on each other.  

You made your way through the sea of people and found a space between the living room (dance floor) and kitchen (bar) that had fewer individuals.  

“Jimin, why didn’t you tell us you had a foxy girlfriend?” You turned around along with Jimin to see what was probably the most handsome man you’d ever laid eyes on. He extended his hand, waiting for you to take it as his smile spread sweetly across his face. You gave him your hand, to which he turned it up and gently placed a kiss on your knuckles, not letting his eyes leave yours. No wonder he didn’t trust these guys, I would give this man whatever he wanted no questions asked.  

“Because I knew you’d try to take her away from me. You know, like you’re doing now?” Jimin pulled you back slightly by your hips, wrapping a protective arm around you as the handsome one smiled.  

“Not his girlfriend. I’m Y/n,” his eyes widened slightly as he looked back and forth between the two of you.  

“I take it you’re single then, Y/n?” He asks. Jimin tries to step on his foot, but he moves it away quickly, eyes still boring into yours with so much intensity you almost forget how to speak. Almost.  

“That I am,” you smile, ignoring Jimin’s attempts to get you to stop talking.  

“Well you, miss Y/n, are welcome here anytime,”  

“DRINKS, lets go get drinks, Y/n, you must be parched,” Jimin pushed you away from the pretty man giving you attention and into the kitchen where there were alcoholic drinks and mixers scattered over every surface.  

“Which one was that?” You ask as Jimin finally let’s go of you, grabbing a red solo cup from where they’re stacked neatly in the corner.  

“That was Jin, you’re not allowed to date him no matter how good at talking he is. Tequila?” Jimin asks, holding up the bottle he’s already poured a shot from into his own cup.  

“I’ll take a beer, thanks,” Jimin rolled his eyes, grabbing you a beer and uncapping it before he still grabs another solo cup and fills it with a shot.  

“You still have to take a shot with me, it’s for good luck,” he takes the beer from your hand as you sip it and puts it on the counter, shoving the cup in your hand to replace it. He holds out his arm, waiting for you to link yours around it so you can take your shots together. As you roll your eyes and comply, Jin stood at the bottom of the stairs watching you and Jimin before a large hand landed on his back, bringing him back to reality.  

“You didn’t get drunk without me, I hope,” Namjoon smiled as he followed Jin’s gaze. His eyes landed on you, arms linked with Jimin, your curves on full display as you knocked your head back, letting the liquor fall smoothly down your throat before you separated, Jimin wrapping an arm around your back, resting on your hip casually as he filled his cup up once more, this time with much more than a shot. “How the fuck did Jimin pull that ass?” He questioned, crossing his arms over his chest as he waited for his older friend to reply.  

“He didn’t. That’s Y/n.” Namjoon's eyes widened as he looked at Jin.  

“Y/n? As in the childhood best friend he never brings around?” Jin nods, looking back over at you. Namjoon thinks for a second before patting Jin’s shoulder again. “Dibs,” He doesn’t wait for him to respond before he makes his way over to you, walking past you to grab a beer before turning again, looking you up and down. You looked familiar, but he couldn’t quite place it.  

“Who's your friend, Jimin?” he spoke, grabbing both you and Jimin's attention as he took a swig of his beer. Jimin sighed.  

“Namjoon, with is Y/n. Y/n, Namjoon–”  

“Oh hey, size doesn’t matter guy! How’s that working out for you?” You smirked widely as you took a small swig of your own beer. Jimin started laughing at your comment, not having any idea of the context but not needing any. Namjoon’s face fell as realization set in.  

“You know, you look a lot different without the baggy hoodie and the coffee cup glued to your hand,” Namjoon smirks as he takes another sip of his beer, now much more intrigued by you.  

“Okay wait, what am I missing here?” Jimin interjected as he finally stopped laughing, trying to figure out how you and his friend know one another.  

“Remember the asshole I told you about from my creative writing class?” your eyes never left Namjoon’s, your head only shifting slightly to the side to face Jimin, who looked at Namjoon with you, mouth open. Namjoon moved his hand over his chest, faking hurt.  

“Asshole? Wow, Y/l/n. That hurts, even from you,” the smug smirk never left his face, nor yours. You shrugged.  

“I’m sure you’ve been called worse. C’mon, Jiminie,” you looked away from Namjoon for the first time since he’d arrived, pulling Jimin and his now very full cup of tequila that you were 90% positive he didn’t add a mixer to. “I wanna dance.”  

- 

“I’m not that drunk, I will be fine,” it was probably somewhere close to 3 in the morning, and you were ready to get out of here and go to bed. Jimin was probably about as drunk as you could be without completely blacking out.  

“You’re not going to walk home or take the subway in the middle of the night looking like that in the dead of winter, getting buried in a pile of snow is a best-case scenario. Just come up to bed with me,” Jimin’s eyes were barely open as he leaned against the front door, trying his best to look stable by relying all his weight onto something to hold him up.  

“I don’t want to put you out, plus you live with like 20 dudes, several of whom tried to grab my ass at some point,” He pushed himself off the door, putting both his hands on your shoulders before he turned you around and pushed you toward the stairs, now relying on you to remain upright.  

“Then I’ll lock the door. I won’t be responsible for your death and I’m too tired to worry about you,” You rolled your eyes as you accepted defeat, helping Jimin up the stairs and into his bedroom at the end of the hall. He made sure he locked the door after you both got in the room. He hastily peeled off his shirt and threw it on the floor before falling onto his bed face first.  

You pulled off your shoes, your feet thanking you as they felt flat ground again. You pulled down your skirt and fishnets, leaving them on his dresser before you slid under the covers beside Jimin, who instinctively wrapped an arm around you and pulled you into him, nuzzling himself into your neck as you both drifted off to sleep comfortably in each other’s embrace.  

- 

It truly was a good thing you worked in a library, because on days you were hungover the quietness of it all made your head hurt less as you readjusted back to normalcy. Not that you were hungover often, especially at work, but on days you were, you knew it wouldn’t be nearly as bad as it was when you worked in a McDonalds.  

You finished putting away yesterday's returns and walked back up to your desk, stopping the cart beside you as you sat down, drinking your hot coffee, begging the caffeine to take away your headache.  

“Was that you I saw sneaking out of my house at seven in the morning?” You looked up from a pile of paperwork to see Namjoon with a wide smirk on his face and a book tucked under his arm as he strolled up to your desk. You looked back down at the papers on your desk that seemed to be multiplying, words evading your vision as you tried to read them.  

“I wasn’t sneaking, I just didn’t want to wake anyone,” he dropped the book down in front of you, leaning his elbows on the taller portion of the desk as you scanned over the book. The Forgotten Fire by Adam Bagdasarian. Interesting book for a frat boy.  

“Whose room were you coming out of?” You wrote the title of the book down on the sign out log, before inputting the same information into the computer.  

“Why don’t you ask your buddies, I’m sure whoever it was would love to brag about the encounter,” You wrote the date on a card and put it back into the book.  

“Ah, did you get burned, Y/l/n?” You ignored his question, handing him back his book, your sarcastic customer service smile taking over.

 “It’s due back in two weeks,” You extend your hand with the book in it cover pointed out to face him as he glances down at it, smug smile still playing on his lips before he takes it from your hand. You let your gaze fall back to your desk as you continued to look over your papers.  

“See you then, Y/l/n, try not to miss me too much,”  

“Only in your wet dreams, Kim,” your comment conned a genuine smile out of him as he walked out the door to the library. He didn’t know why, but Namjoon needed to know who you were with, and you gave him a pretty good suggestion. He made it not even 10 steps away from the building before he pulled out his phone, opening the group chat that all the members of his frat were in.  

Namjoon slid his phone back in his pocket before he could read Yoongi’s complaints.

No one had ever really stood up to him, especially when it came to his intelligence. Namjoon had prided himself on being the smartest person back in his high school, and even while he knew he had no hope of being the smartest person in the college, he’d at least hoped to be smarter than most of the people he came across.  

When he saw you walking on campus on the first day of class, he thought he might try his luck at flirting with you. While he didn’t think you seemed to be the most attractive based of the over-sized sweater and hair definitely not done, but you were the shy one. Face red as you spoke allowed about your poem is a self-deprecating manner, sitting as far away from others as possible. You kept away from people for the entirety of class, and then walked by yourself to get a coffee.  

You seemed easy. He’d tease you before throwing a compliment or two at your feet, and you’d be all over him. Instead, he got to the teasing part, and you’d shot back at him. You’d shot back good. He didn’t even know how to respond, so he didn’t. That’s when he decided it’d be fun to have a little rivalry with you. You didn’t talk unless someone spoke to you, but God when you did speak? It’s never something he’s expecting; and he can’t get enough.  

He hated losing, and you were the only competition he’d have this semester, all his other classes seemed to go by like a breeze. But your confidence alone would make you the most fun person to go up against.  

Then he saw you at the party – saw what you could really look like if you put effort into yourself and knew the feud he’d started with you was probably going to be the hardest one he’d have to overcome. 

There were two ways he could win: Get better grades, get better at comebacks, and prove that he was the smartest.  

Or 

He could ruin you.  

He’d never seen you at any parties before, so the likelihood of you being someone who liked to sleep around was low. That, and the fact Jimin wouldn’t even let you come to meet them meant he didn’t trust you around them; scared they’d break your heart or try to. So, you were probably emotional when it came to sex. If he could get you under him, he’d always come out on top.

Note: I TOLD YOU NAMJOON WAS TOXIC BUT I PROMISE IT'S NOT PERMANENT

[anghraine]

apologies, no need to reply, but what does "desapego autocomplaciente" mean? i google-translated it as "self indulgent detachment" but i don't understand what that means in context....

Self-congratulatory detachment, more or less. 

I think my clearest explanation was probably here, but for Maximum Context there’s the entire #unsentimental empowerment fic grumping tag.

I’d been struggling to articulate what I find so repellent about the genre I call (surprise) unsentimental empowerment fic, and after a couple of grumbling posts, happened to respond to an ask about it on the Tumblr Language Day thing. 

And for some reason I only managed to find a phrase for what I'd been trying to talk about when I had to fumble for a way to express it in Spanish. What I actually said was that it’s desapego autocomplaciente en lugar de autenticidad. Esta es la razón que las narrativas son tan similares y didácticas y aburridas.

(...self-congratulatory detachment in place of authenticity. This is the reason that the narratives are so similar and didactic and boring.)

[mirrorforevers]

here, there, and everywhere • graham coxon/reader

this fic is based on two prompts y'all sent me:

and

this fic really tested all of my blur knowledge holy Fuck. blur as talking heads au i guess. how cool would it be if they

1. had a girl bassist instead of the cheese tory dude

2. werent as unhappy as they were in the mid 90s (just a bit)

3. were just a little 🤏🏻 bit more female friendly lets just pretend this is a universe where the blurjob passes didnt exist heh

it took me everything i had to make this sound as realistic as it could be. u know these girls who think they could fix patrick bateman or don draper? perhaps y’all could fix blur

consider this a gift n not only me writing for your prompt, @nottuned! thank u so much for all your support n encouragement n for always bein so sweet 🥺 i hope u enjoy reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it!

let’s see how many references to unfortunate britpop moments y’all can find in this

also i hope i captured the silliness of the gossip and drama in that era well. if you enjoyed it, please leave an ask telling me more! ur feedback is rly important to me 😔✊🏻

tw (?) reader has shitty parents

word count: 7.938 (this one's quite long!)

smut. set in the 90s. au.

You were unlocking your door when you heard your house phone ring. The shrill sound echoed through the empty corridors as you hurriedly unwrapped your scarf, tossing your keys and backpack on nearby furniture as you ran to answer the call.

“Hello?” You answer, panting.

“Y/N?”

“Dave?” You smile, that call was a very welcome surprise. Your friend owed you an answer.

-

A few weeks ago, Dave Rowntree, your music classmate who became a close friend, told you that he had teamed up with two other proficient musicians to form a band. Dave was ecstatic, and every day he had new stories about his new friends to tell you between breakfasts and lunches that you shared between the countless hours of rehearsals. Even though you weren't part of the group, you already felt that you knew Damon and Graham like the back of your hand. Yin and Yang. One was expansive, ambitious, vain, impulsive. The other, shy, introspective, anxious and careful.

Damon Albarn wanted to be an actor, Graham Coxon had a firm foot in the visual arts. One was a fan of grand classical compositions, the other was a Beatles fan. They had been friends since they were children, in a seemingly unbreakable bond. Damon dropped out of his theater class not only because out of a sudden he had found a bigger calling in music instead of acting, but also because he couldn't stand being away from his best friend for so long. You found yourself often imagining their faces and voices while trying to make all of the wild and endearingly funny stories Dave told you more tangible in your head.

It was not long before Dave started dropping little hints that they needed someone else for their project. “It’s not that Graham isn’t good at bass,” he’d say, “but we could do better.” It wasn't at the top of your plans to be part of a band right now, especially as you were preparing intensely to join the Royal Academy of Music, and he knew it. When you mentioned the conversations you had with Dave about the boys on your family dinner, in quiet wonder and timid want of being part of something really exciting, your parents wrinkled their noses. Focus on the greater things, they’d say. Don’t let these boys distract you from your goal.

Our goal, they meant to say. Since you were born, you never knew if the things you wanted were really your will or theirs.

But anyway.

That dynamic went on for a while, until the day Dave invited you to audition for them while you shared a Diet Coke in the tube home.

“Will it take too much of my time?” You asked, coyly.

“Bold of you to assume we’ll let you in that quickly.” He chuckles, amused by your confidence. You playfully elbow him in return. He knew how good you were at what you did, though, and there’s lightness in his tone when he continues, “But no, unless you let it. You’ll probably have to stand up to Damon every once in a while.” He sips the drink, handing it over to you.

“What about Graham? How much is he determined to make it big?”

“Damon’s the one who wants it the most. Graham’s studying Fine Arts at Goldsmiths, so. There’s still cautiousness in him.”

“Huh. Okay then.” You reply, thoughts running wild. “Do we have a time and date?”

“Is tomorrow ok to you?”

“Sure. After our class?”

“Perfect.” The train reaches his station. He ruffles your hair: “See you tomorrow then.”

“See you.”

You don’t tell anything about it to your parents, you just warn them that you’ll arrive a bit later than usual. Dave’s intel was crucial to your choice of songs: knowing Graham was the beatlemaniac and also the rational brake to Damon’s tireless ambition, you knew who to please and have as an ally, so you build an innovative and fresh mashup of Paul McCartney’s greatest basslines to play for them. Of course it could backfire, but you didn’t care. You had a hell of a good ear anyway and if Damon wanted you to play anything out of the blue, you would improvise beautifully over it.

The day comes. You didn’t know why you were that nervous for an amateur audition. You weren’t even sure if it was the right path to follow, given that, depending on how focused Damon really was and how contagious his aspiration was, being part of a band could really take you out of your predestinated course. The reason why you were so nervous, now thinking a little more about it, may be because deep inside, you want your path to be a little less predictable. You didn’t want to fill your heart with hopes that you might make it big and travel all over the world because you didn’t even know them. But… what if it clicks? You knew some people in the scene whose work was getting seriously recognized out there.

Meeting them for the first time was an enigmatic experience. Damon was incredibly brash and cocky - not the first theater kid you’ve met in your life. Graham was way more approachable, though also a bit conceited when pushed just right. You wondered if you’d fit in that boys’ club, and decided you wouldn’t be an easy target for discredit or any kind of shit they might give you. “Took me a while to fully get their trust. You’ll do just fine”, Dave said, out of their earshot.

That gave you more fuel to play amazingly well. Damon definitely wasn’t one to be impressed quickly, but he was, when you finished your set. So was Graham - Graham was starry eyed with your performance, actually. Albarn showed you a song and asked you if you could improvise to it, just as you imagined. Of course you could, on the first play. You even suggested some adjustments to its structure. Your feedback was welcomed and noted.

-

Even though everything went surprisingly well, you still weren't sure if you would be a member of “Seymour”, as they called themselves. (You knew it wasn’t the best name, but you didn’t have a better suggestion at the time so you’ve kept your opinion to yourself.) Graham became eerily quiet out of a sudden and wouldn’t cross eyes with you the entire time you were there. Damon, well, was Damon. Perhaps he thought you were too ordinary and mainstream for deciding to play Beatles when he’s trying to be the new avant-garde Jesus.

But Dave's news was different than you expected. “They really, really enjoyed your audition. As I thought they would.” You can hear the smile in his voice. "When can you rehearse with us?"

-

Months after, on your first gig as a fully formed and integrated band, Damon was hit in the face by a guy twice his size, Graham vomited onstage and you and Dave had to take care of both. A beautiful way to close the already exquisite day you had, after you fought with your parents, got kicked out of your childhood home and gave up on entering the Royal Academy of Music two days after you received your acceptance letter featuring rave reviews of your entrance exam.

Dealing with these boys - no, grown-ass men - was hard, but not completely unpleasant. If it were totally unpleasant, you wouldn’t give up on your entire life to embark on such an adventure.

You - plural you - were so gifted and Damon’s compositions were so good. You could see that artsy pretentious mess of an act going somewhere. Of course, you were a bit lost in your life, but so were they, as you ran from city to city meeting new people and trying new things in your journey to fame.

Loneliness, once a close friend, became a distant acquaintance. One you didn’t know anymore.

You confess you were getting worried, though, with how much money you had left on your savings and how much you were spending lately now that your parents weren’t an active part of your life. Wanting to eat something you cannot dream of buying without that money being really useful in a much more critical situation, not having nearly enough money to replace something important that broke or got torn off was frustrating. Some basic things became luxuries out of a sudden.

One day in particular, you very briefly mentioned that you were dying to eat a slice of chocolate cake, but your voice was so small and everyone was so immersed in their duties you thought no one gave two shits to what you said. Two days later, Graham arrived late at rehearsal with a small chocolate cake in his hands, handing it over to you like it was a completely ordinary act. Nothing in the way he acted told you he expected a reward, it was so natural and… gentle. You knew no one in your band could buy a chocolate cake without it being apocalyptic to their personal finances during that time.

That day, you were assured by fate that feeling lost together was better than feeling guided alone.

-

The band finally got on track - strictly musically speaking. Personally speaking, many contemporaries who followed you at parties and other events described you as an ever-growing odd, annoying and intermittently disarming bunch - and Blur and its members became household names, at least in the UK. It became harder and harder everyday to impose yourself as an entire industry and its target public aimed to tear you down. Men couldn’t understand.

(Graham Coxon was the one who tried the hardest to.)

It was four in the morning. You’ve got used to following your bandmates to hospitals, running away from trouble or knowing when to relish in it. But it was the first time you offered yourself to clean up dried blood from one’s face, given how much you hated seeing the fluid and even fainted when younger whenever exposed to it.

You, so delicately, wipe the saline solution-soaked cotton across Graham’s face, who flinches at the cold sensation on his still sensitive skin. He stares at you with the eyes of a child, and you couldn’t help but give him a slight, warm smile in return, which he retributes. Your face conveyed gratitude and affection towards the one you were taking care of. Your hands still struggled to stay completely still after the surge of adrenaline your body received a few hours ago.

Being the only girl in a massive band, and one the music magazines and mainstream media loved sexualizing, meant having paparazzis in your window in odd hours (not that that’s acceptable in any hour, but you had to lower your standards even more these days), meant having different photographers trying to pressure you to get into all kinds of uncomfortable angles with skimpy-ass dresses and just count on the intervention of your fellow bandmates so they would stop, also having invasive male fans who would try to harass you in any way they could.

Of course the day where one of your bandmates would get into a fist fight with one of these men inserted into these categories would come. And even though they were all protective of you, each in their own peculiar, increasingly contradictory way, Graham’s dedication to it was sometimes commendable.

You were making your way through a small corridor of people on your way to the stage when a random guy cupped one of your breasts. It’s not like the venue was incredibly tight, it could not have been on accident and it made your blood boil. You turned around to scream at him, and Graham, who was just behind you, threw a punch directly towards the man’s face, without thinking twice.

And oh boy, took a lot of people and a sweet amount of time to separate the two after that.

After all was said and done, Graham had a few scratches, a black eye and a cut brow. He kept dodging your many “sorrys”, “you didn’t have to do this” and other expressions of guilt. “You have nothing to be sorry about, he deserved it”, he kept assuring you, like a mantra, just giving in to your pleas when you supplicated to take care of his wounds during intermission and after the show.

“I get why you did what you did, Gra. I hate that you took such a risk because of me, but I understand.” you say, voice cracking from not using it for a while after spending some good minutes in complete silence taking care of him. “However,” you soak another cotton ball in the saline solution a roadie got you, punctuating the word with a squeeze to the cotton to remove excess liquid. “I was worried sick about you. What if he… had a knife or something? You could’ve got seriously injured. Or killed.”

“Don’t worry about me. I’m perfectly able to have a good fight,” after wincing from the contact of the cold wet cotton with his dried blood, he purses his lips in a forced, shy smile, trying to light up the mood. He notices your hands are still shaking from the adrenaline, and takes one of them in his bigger ones, trying to calm you down. The fact that he did this for you, coupled with the fear and how tired you felt of having to go through that kind of situation once again, made you cry-laugh from how overwhelmed you felt.

His expression changes to one of pure compassion in an instant. “Hey, don’t--oh my,” he gets up from his chair to embrace you as you pour your frustrations through fat tears running down his shoulder.

“It’s so exhausting,” you mumble, through sobs. “Now I’m putting you in danger too. I feel like I did and I’m still doing everything wrong. I should be the one giving you a shoulder to cry on.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong! Anything at all, I promise you,” he says, tenderly, running his hands through your hair, still holding you tight. “It was his fault! I decided it was the right thing to do. You’re worth the risk. What people have been putting you through is unacceptable.”

“I’m not worth the risk!” You break apart from his arms, trying to get your point across. “What would I do without you if someone killed you? You need to be more careful!”

The silence hangs heavy between you two thanks to the weight of your words.

“You should’ve asked me before you lunged at him, at least. I don’t know.” You wipe your many tears as you move towards the nearest bottle of water to try to calm yourself down. “It’ll never end. I’m so afraid that these situations will get even worse. That,” you motion at his wounds and dirty clothes, “is a bloody tragedy. It’s a tragedy things escalated to this point. You can’t do that forever.”

“This is just a consequence. And something I would do for you in a heartbeat whenever necessary.”

“Graham, I don’t want you to get hurt because--”

“They hurt you. I won’t let you go through that alone. Besides,” he comes closer to you again. “As I already told you, I can take care of myself, most of the time.” He takes your face in his hands, his fingers so delicately running across your cheeks to dry your tears. You knew that gesture wasn’t his way of asking you for anything you weren’t ready to give him yet. He just wanted you to feel safe. “And I want to take care of you.”

“I’m the one cleaning your wounds.”

“A great partnership, I think.” Coxon chuckles softly, and finally gets a smile out of you. As he always does. “And they make me look cool, don’t you think?”

“Shut up.” You giggle, still feeling too emotional to return to the stage. You sigh: “Thank you for being there for me. You know I’m still not very used to it. Just please be safe.”

The roadie returns, a little flustered by interrupting your little moment together. “5 minutes and you’re back, guys.”

“Okay!” You both turn to answer her.

“I’ll be. No need to thank me for anything, Y/N.” He answers, giving your forehead a little kiss. “Let’s go.”

“Give me two minutes. I’ll be right behind you.”

-

“What’s it like, being the only woman in the band?”

Four eyerolls at once don’t seem to faze the interviewer. She waits for your response.

Apparently the thousand invasive questions regarding Damon’s love life and the same bullshit treatment of women as either rare specimen or sex dolls is what pleases the audience of music TV shows these days.

“What do you think?” is what you say.

“Must be a thrill to have these beautiful boys around you all the time. And we’ve heard you never even took advantage of it!”

You don’t like where this is heading. “Is that… a bad thing? I don’t know what you mean.”

“Perhaps some of our lady viewers might think it is. No judgement though!” She raises her hands. “You do you, it’s just that it’s quite unexpected to see prudes in non-Christian bands. I mean… from what we’ve heard.”

“I’m sorry? What are you trying to say? What did you hear?”

Her tongue clicks while she stares at you with defiance and mischief on her eyes, as she goes a little further and raises her voice so it can overlay yours. “Oh love. You do know what I’m talking about. There’s no need to be ashamed of being a virgin.”

Your cheek burns intensely and the only thing you wished for was for the ground to swallow you whole. Dave and Graham are especially uncomfortable. Damon’s a bit amused. The three knew almost everything there was to know about you. The one topic that surprisingly they didn’t know about is that you’re still a virgin.

They know you’ve been single for a long time. They know that’s part of what draws so much attention and twisted lore regarding you and your past, but that’s not something they felt they needed to know about you at all, and you truly never felt the need to comment about that with any of them, and they haven’t asked. Not even Mr. “the way to be successful in this game is to make all the boys wanna be you and all the girls wanna sleep with you. In your case that’d work in reverse” Damon Albarn.

“Is that even something that should be discussed in an interview about our music? Is that what your boss told you to ask her about?” Dave answers, his tone venomous.

“Musicians are way more than just music. You’re entertainment in every sense of the word.”

“Who told you that about me?” You asked, not sure if you want to know the answer.

“A lovely elderly lady who lives in Elgin Crescent. She knows you so well.”

That’s your mum. That’s how far low your relationship has degraded. You’re not surprised. That doesn’t feel less like a punch on your gut, but you don’t feel like tumbling again. Not today.

“I know who you’re talking about. Tell her I asked her to go fuck herself and burn in hell. In that order.”

“But that’s your--”

“Yes, she is my mum!” If people are going to expose you anyway, then why don’t you do it on your terms? “We’re truly entertainment in every sense of the word, aren’t we. Not everyone’s mum’s a cunt. Some of us aren’t that lucky.”

“You want to be the next Gallagher sister with the spicy remarks?”

“Not sure. But I do want to be the last person you ever get to interview.”

-

The management of the band wasn’t at all surprised your interview became UK’s topic of the week. People were heavily divided between family is family and we shouldn’t hate our relatives and blood isn’t everything, family can be shitty too. Your bandmates were proud of you. The management was angry but tried to understand, and didn’t press you for further explanations. They suggested a two-week break from everything so Blur could rest their image and start a fresh cycle after that, and you gracefully accepted it.

The whole thing seemed so ridiculous the more you thought about it. Did your mum tell the reporter about that gratuitously? What was their conversation like? How did that even happen?

You became the butt of jokes in some places. You saw other famous people doing challenges between them, countdowns, all sorts of crude remarks. What a pathetic, sad chapter of your career.

You dial Graham, and you feel like your heart was about to burst out of your chest.

“Hey, Gra. It’s me.”

“Hey, Y/N.” He sounds pleasantly surprised. “How's it going?”

“Better, I guess. I have to take my mind off all that chaos though. Are you available right now?”

“Yeah.”

“You’ve been owing me a movie night for quite a while now and I miss spending time with you. Wanna come over?”

“Aww. Sure, I--um. Do you want me to bring anything?”

“I’m pretty sure I got everything we need here--ah… I think I don’t have any more beers.”

“I’ll buy some then. See ya in a few minutes.”

Actually, you couldn’t take all that chaos off your mind because that was the only thing in it. You’re feeling so nervous.

The main reasons sex wasn’t a priority for you until now were:

You didn’t have any real opportunities of losing your virginity in your teens. You were impossibly introspective until, like, 3, 4 years ago, and the way your family worked hasn’t really allowed you to get really close to people. Be it boyfriends, girlfriends or just friends. Anything that threatened to take time off the various tasks and classes your parents assigned to you just couldn’t be part of your life. To be honest, you still struggled a bit to form meaningful connections with people thanks to how you grew up.

The moment you stopped being shy, you noticed it was a real man’s world out there, especially in music, classical or not. You didn’t want anyone to think you fucked your way up to the top, you didn’t want any messy affairs. Also, you had yourself, and you didn’t get all of the hype regarding the concept of screwing someone. But apparently there’s a lot you’ve been missing, given the importance people seem to give to it. After that incident, even though you swore to yourself you wouldn’t give in to any kind of misogynistic pressure, that was one that really got under your skin.

You never really found someone who you felt 100% safe with in that sense until the one who’s about to arrive at your house appeared in your life. Bloody hell, and you don’t even have anything romantic going on. By the time you were a Blur member, you’ve fooled around a bit, but not all the way. You knew how to kiss, knew how to touch yourself and even brought manual satisfaction to some random fool you thought you were into one time. But perhaps this is the time to go all the way. Why not? Everyone knew how close you two were. He made you feel special. He was so kind. And gorgeous. And--

You hear a knock on your door. It’s him. Beers in hand, hair somewhat in place, twitchy as ever.

He comes inside and you feel like your legs will give up anytime. It was not the first time he visited you. It was one of many, actually, and he noticed you were acting… different.

“Y/N, are you okay?” He asks after a brief dialogue between you two, after plating some snacks for both of you.

“Graham...” You sigh, being really careful with your words. “What is your perception of me?”

“My perception of you?” He smiles. “I… think you’re great. You’re fun to be around. You’re one of the best musicians I know, if not the best. Why are you asking me that?”

“N-nothing. It’s nothing. Also, I asked the wrong question. What was your first perception of me?”

“Uh… the day of your audition?”

“Exactly. You barely talked to me that day.”

His eyes lower to his own feet. “I was really timid, actually. I wasn’t used to being near any girl, especially one who… w-would spend so much time around me if everything went well.”

You giggle. “I thought you hated me.”

“Never!” his smile turns into a full blown laughter. You melt at his confession. “Also because it seemed like you were trying to read my mind or something.”

“Of course! Because I thought you hated me!” Now that was a laughter you two shared. You do a voice: “‘Why is that pesky girl trying to get in my band?’”

“My goodness, no! I don’t even sound like that - you know what, I changed my mind. You suck. Because, besides the fact you don’t even know what I sound like, you still haven’t told me why you are asking me that in the first place.”

You couldn’t help but notice how he slightly cornered you physically in one of the kitchen corridors. Graham could be really persuasive when he wanted to.

“Okay. Right. Um. I’ve been thinking about some stuff.”

“What, exactly?”

“Everything that happened this month. The great virginity debacle,” you roll your eyes, and he scoffs.

“You don’t own anyone any information about what you do or don't do with your life. Everyone’s being so invasive. That was incredibly childish of the reporter to do, and we talked about that hundreds of times.”

“Yeah, but… you know what, forget it.”

“Tell me, Y/N. I just said that because I want you to know you were not in the wrong.”

“I know. It’s just… I’ve been thinking that maybe it’s silly for me to… keep closing myself for affection. Any kind of affection.”

“What are you talking about?” His brows furrowed in curiosity.

“I’m not sure if it’s the pressure that finally got under my skin, but… I’m willing to learn what all the fuss is about. Maybe it’s silly that I’m still a virgin.”

He bites his lips, still processing what you just said, expression unreadable. Perhaps you’ve treaded a ground you shouldn’t. You step back both literally and figuratively. “I’m sorry I even brought that up--”

“No, no, don’t be.” He assures you. “I’m just… surprised, that’s all. I swear.”

“And...” You know what. You already went too far, so why not go all the way. You’ve already gone way past the point of no return. “I was wondering if… you would… popmycherry?”

His eyes widen, yours still closed. When you finally open them, he’s closer to you again.

If his head was a machine, you’re sure it would be releasing lots of steam and shaking due to overprocessing. You felt like you just ruined everything.

“Y/N, you don’t need to do it if you don’t really want to.”

“But I want it! At first I thought I didn’t, but then I thought...”

“I don’t want to be part of that if you’re just doing it to fulfill weird expectations.”

“But it’s not that. Not just... that. I asked about your perception of me because I really like you, Gra. I think we should be more than friends and I wanted to know what you think about me. And I want to know what the fuss is about, yes, but I’m not telling you that just so I can lose my virginity to prove some point. I’m telling you that because I like you, I want to kiss you, and I think it would be a great idea if you showed me what it’s like. Y-you know, sex.”

“I-I can’t believe it. Did you even have any movie in mind?” His smile’s back, but you’re still not confident about what his answer will be.

“I didn’t. I’m sorry. You don’t have to--”

He sighs. “I was in love with you the moment I first saw you, actually.” He says it like he’s releasing a huge load out of his back, his arms crossed. Now your eyes widen, and you hold your breath without even noticing. “I didn’t want you to feel pressured. I know how you feel, or, felt about relationships, so… there wasn’t any reason for me to tell you that. And what I said about being timid was just half of the truth.”

“Huh?”

“I also was really intimidated by how pretty you looked. You can’t imagine how.”

“No way.”

“It’s true. I felt like I wasn’t even worthy of looking at you, really.”

“You’re joking. That’s mean, Gra.”

“I’m not. I’m really not.” He doesn’t look like he is joking. He looks relieved. “I’m really not. That’s why I’m so surprised by your request.”

“I’m nothing special.”

“You are everything to me. But I can’t accept your offer, not now.”

“Are you… seeing someone? Am I too late?”

“No. Definitely not. I just want you to be sure you’re not doing it because people are saying you should.”

“Graham, I’m a grown woman.”

“I know.”

Graham carefully presses his slightly chapped lips to yours, kissing you for a few precious, heart stopping seconds before pulling away; his voice is impossibly silky when he suggests, “Let’s watch a movie. How about The Godfather? I heard it’s airing tonight. Then, if in two weeks you don’t change your mind, tell me and I’ll be glad to help you with what you want. Do we have a deal?”

“That’s so unfair. I want you so bad.” You whisper.

“Tell me if you still do in two weeks.”

You sigh, defeated. “...Deal.”

-

You definitely notice the subtle shift in Graham’s personality and actions after that fateful night. If you were already close, both figuratively and literally, it now seemed like he would use any excuse to always touch you, be near you, sometimes tease you. The shift was subtle, though, don’t forget it’s still Graham Coxon we’re talking about - the constant “is it okay if”s or “is it alright if I”s were still there, as careful as ever. You don’t even talk about your deal that entire time, or even kiss again - sometimes you wondered if it was even real or just a fabrication of your mind.

The way he now caressed your hand discreetly when you listened to Damon’s ramblings, the way his hands now went directly to your waist when your games became too handsy, the way he seemed to be madly in love with everything you were and still are from the start - made you realize you were ready for this man to be a consistent part of your life.

The dust of the controversy was settled, and your own intentions were 100% clear to you now. The societal pressure has waned. The need for Graham to be your first persisted. After exactly 2 weeks have passed, you call him again, yearning to share the answer with him.

One beep.

Two beeps.

Three beeps.

Four beeps. “Hello?”

You release a sigh hidden deep inside of your lungs. “Graham, it’s Y/N.”

“Oh. It’s been two weeks.” You could hear the contemplative tone of his voice.

“...Yeah. That’s precisely the reason I’m calling you.”

“Do you still want to…?”

“...Desperately.”

“Ok.” He chuckles, flustered as hell on the other side of the phone, probably one of the prettiest sounds you’ve ever heard. “Right. Ok. Your place or mine?”

“I think there’ll be an element of mystery if I go to your place this time.” You lose some of the constraints this silly shyness has been tying you on. “Do you have everything we might need there?”

“We don’t need a dungeon, you know.”

“The basics.” You make your smile heard.

“I do have… I do have the basics.”

“See you in a few minutes then.”

“Will you want to… ease into it? Or just go straight to it?”

“God, don’t make it awkward!” Your cheeks burn, your smile turning into contagious laughter. “Maybe… I don’t know. Ease into it, I guess? A movie night… but with s-something else?”

“Okay. Sounds good.”

“Alright then. See you.”

“See you.”

-

You don’t choose any particularly fancy or sexy clothes, instead settling for a slightly oversized yellow striped shirt he gave you as a birthday present some months ago and some skirt that fit you well. He wasn’t one to lavish his loved ones with gifts all the time, but few things were as precious as the look on his face whenever he saw you wearing something he gave you or, hell, even eating something he paid for you. You’re thrilled to see it again when he opens the door for you, it easing some of your deepest doubts.

2001: A Space Odyssey is already playing on the TV when you arrive. Despite it being one of your favorite movies of all time, and his, you’re not mad it was already halfway through when you arrived. It wasn’t your main priority to rewatch it for the 17th time tonight.

He offers you some wine, which you accept to ease the nerves. You sit on his couch, and he shares the cozy space with you, now mindlessly throwing one of his arms around your shoulders. You cuddle up to him, and everything seems peaceful in the world for a while.

The tip of his fingers softly caress your lifted knee, absentmindedly. You couldn’t help but notice how well his body fits with yours, how your skin was apparently made for him to touch, and the anxiety rumbles in your stomach like a storm in a wild wavy sea. After some minutes, you raise your head, his big brown eyes meeting yours as if asking you a silent question. You leaned up a bit more to press your lips to his, in a silent answer. The sweetness in him makes this moment as precious as every other moment you ever shared with him. His hands enter your hair, making you shiver a bit from the unfamiliarity and the electricity of it all - but it doesn’t sway you from deepening the kiss, wanting more of his taste, more of this, more of him.

“Do you wanna take this to the bed?” He whispers, after noticing your moans were becoming more frequent and needy. You nod, and you are taken by surprise when he carries you bridal style to it, hiding your excited giggles in his broad shoulders.

Graham wasn’t exactly the most organized man in the world - so the fact that his bedroom was now impossibly tidy was something that positively caught your attention. He put some planning into this. He lays you down and you part your legs, beckoning him to meet you between them. He does, and you go back to the breathtaking makeout session. You notice he’s holding himself back a bit, taking his time, his warm tongue moving smoothly, not hurriedly, against yours. His self control falters a bit though, given how he can’t stop grinding against you. You follow the rhythm of his hips a bit timidly and not nearly as in sync as you’d really like, though the pressure his covered cock is creating against your core can already be felt and some particular thrusts are able to fill at least partially the aching, wet need growing within you.

“How do you feel about oral?” He asks, breath warm near your ear, his voice raspy and spent by his desire for you.

“Um… It would be my first time receiving or doing it.”

“Would you like me to go down on you?”

“Wow. I never thought I would hear you saying something like that.” You smile, still assimilating the situation you’re in, trying not to show how badly his voice is affecting you. “Sure.”

“I never thought I would get to propose this to you. Aren’t we full of surprises lately.” He smiles back, warmly. He notices your hands trembling a bit from how anxious you are while you’re taking off your underwear with his help, and as he lowers himself to where you need him most, he takes your hands in his as an act of reassurance. “Tell me what you like. Tell me if what I’m doing works for you. I want this to be a great experience.”

“You want me to get addicted to you, that’s what you want,” He chuckles, lovingly kissing your thigh as a reply. “Okay, Gra. Guess I’ll find out along the way.”

You quickly take a peak below you to see the lower half of his face disappear in the middle of your thighs. The sight alone sets your fire ablaze, as he hooks his arms around your thighs and lifts you closer to his mouth, his lips ghosting over the curls between your legs tantalizingly and his breath catching when your hips jerk forward.

As he begins his ministrations, you immediately notice it’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt. That feeling was completely alien to you. It was even wetter than you expected, and weird, but powerfully pleasant. Before this exact moment, you had a firm belief that hardly anyone else would make you feel the same way, or better, than you do yourself, but apparently you were very wrong. Thankfully you were wrong. “My god,” you gasp as the flat of his tongue drags over your folds, too much and not enough, and you jerk at the contact. “This is great. So weird, but-- great.”

He moans at your response, his movements carefully enthusiastic. He works his tongue between your folds and traces up to curl the tip of it around your clit, and it’s quite endearing and madly arousing to see how he eats out you like you’re the sweetest and tastier dessert he has ever tasted. You involuntarily buck against him with a desperate sound the moment he moves his tongue and lips in a particularly wicked way, something that definitely doesn’t go unnoticed by him, but you still feel the need to highlight in case it didn’t - “That. Keep doing that, please,”

And he does. The building of this climax is also different than the ones you already had by your own hands, and is more coy. As he sees the drops of sweat sliding along your soft skin and the expressions on your face as you get lost in this new but enchanting sensations, his hesitation and self-control fades away; there’s nothing uncertain in the way he buries his face in your cunt now, nothing restrained in the groan he lets out as he devours you and drinks you down as if you’re the first stream of water he has seen in days.

His tongue glides deeper in your folds again and again, swirling up through the wetness you’re coated with to tease at your clit while he grunts and strains closer, squeezing your thighs with both hands tight. The wave of heat inside of you is cresting so fast, you don't even know how to tell him, how to signal that you’re nearly done for and, in the end, it happens too fast to even try. He sucks at your clit, circling it with his tongue, once, twice, and then you’re crying out, shaking underneath him, trying to keep your thighs from clenching too hard around his head as he laps you through it with with urgent whimpers and moans, as if he cannot have enough of you.

You’re still trembling when he rises, the look on his face revealing to you how proud he feels by making you feel this way. It looks so good on him.

You fail miserably at the simple task of connecting words together after that, choosing instead to collect your remaining strength, prop yourself up and beckon him again to keep kissing him and learn, through his talented tongue, how you taste. He kisses the thin fabric of the shirt at your chest that covers you from view, your throat, your jaw, and before he reaches your impatient lips, he notes, sinfully, “Seems like you enjoyed yourself, love.”

“That was… unbelievable. Stars, I want to make you feel good too. Please show me how.”

“Keep kissing me,” he begs, voice still strained from how aroused he is. “I want to be inside you so bad. Let’s get you prepared.” You’re still so sensitive, you tread on overstimulation when his fingers lightly touch your clit, making you break the kiss in a hiss. He traces a line on your folds, inspecting the impact his mouth had on you. “So wet for me.”

“Bit slower, Gra,” He complies to your breathy plea, his fingers now more tame as he slowly spreads your wetness throughout your pussy. He stretches towards the nightstand to grab a bottle of lube, interrupting his contact to spread some on his fingers before unhurriedly slipping his middle finger inside of you. The coldness of the gel makes you shiver in surprise, the easiness brought by it very welcomed. Again - the sensation is odd. Completely unfamiliar. The feeling of having something inside of you for the first time, going further than you ever dared to try, probing, exploring; the coldness of the lube clashing against your burning hot cunt. But it also felt nice. The focused look on his face was adorable, he looked like he was a scientist in the middle of very complex research.

Despite the panting, the messy hair and the fire in his eyes.

Your body already has a lot of new sensations to process simultaneously, so when he asks you to take off your bra and shirt so his tongue can work on your nipples - which you gladly accept, you feel like you’re on sensual overload. His tongue, again, so talented, takes your mind off the slight burning you feel when he introduces his ring finger to your soaked, throbbing core, his focused, carefully overpowering and constant stimulation driving you insane.

“Does it feel good?” He asks, voice muffled by your breast. You nod, carried by the wave of pleasure sweeping you.

“Yes. God, yes.” You pant, tangling your fingers tightly on his thick hair as an encouragement, a desperate sound escaping from your lips the moment he reaches a certain point within you you didn’t even know existed, hot mouth continuing to lick and suck your nipple. Even though you were spent by your last orgasm, he was indeed getting you addicted to those new feelings, and even though this was heavenly, truly heavenly, you needed more. “Gra, I’m ready, I think.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. Please.”

Releasing your nipple from his lips with a sounding pop, he eagerly frees himself from his trousers - hard as a brick - and puts protection and lubrication on, swiftly positioning himself between your thighs while stroking himself to the sight in front of him. You motion to take off your skirt, and he holds your hand, not letting you. “Don’t. It’ll be really hot to fuck you in this.” He confesses, giving your forehead a kiss in a very different context than before. He aligns his forehead with yours, each of your lips just barely touching while you breathe each other’s air. He looks deep into your eyes, slowly running the tip of his cock between the slick folds of your pussy, coating himself in the remnants of your pleasure. “Do you trust me?”

You trust me to know your limits? Not to go any further if you don’t really want me to?

“Absolutely.”

The only response you get from him is a shuddering, helpless moan into your mouth and you hold him tighter to you, grinding your still sensitive cunt up against his cock while he pulls hard at the soft fur next to your head. You feel your soaking pussy lips part around the solid curve of his length and gradually coat the underside of him in slick with every gentle circle and roll your hips make, as he finally pulls away from your mouth to drop his forehead to your neck. He then, very slowly, penetrates you, stopping when he hears the noises you make indicating you’re struggling to adjust to his presence. Out of everything you’ve felt in the last minutes, this was by far the most painful sensation. “This-- is new,” you note, your face completely incapable of hiding the discomfort. He also notices that.

“Are you okay? Do you want me to stop?”

“It’s okay. I’ll get used to it.”

“It’s not supposed to be about endurance, you know.” He says, a bit breathless and worried, caressing your hair. “Tell me when it’s okay to move. Or if you feel too much pain.”

After some long seconds and some deep breaths, you say: “Okay. Go on.”

“As you wish.”

He moves inside you at a very slow pace, the lubrication clearly making it easier for you to handle it. It still hurts, significantly, but the sensation of being filled is also surprisingly arousing.

His hand moves to your sensitive clit again in small, measured circles, your little moans being a mixture of the pain of penetration and the sheer ecstasy of seeing him falling apart because of you. The way his chest heaves while the drops of sweat start pearling his fair skin, the furrowed brows and broken groans, the thickness of him as he rests heavy up against your entrance, the way his voice presses deliciously tight in his throat as he gasps out into the quiet room - everything’s making your chest burst in love and satisfaction. You tighten your grip around him and roll your hips up into his cock, letting it break you open nice and slow; it stretches you wide with a deliciously sharp fullness and pleasure rips through you, and Graham becomes even more vocal as he picks up a steady and gradually faster pace. He turned all of your keys, it’s about time you turn some of his.

“Graham, deeper,” you whimper, continuing to tighten your legs and hoist yourself up, lifting your hips to take his cock deeper inside you. His name rips itself from your throat while Coxon clenches his jaw and starts to lose himself in the pleasure, holding you down into the bed while he allows your desperation to guide him to the perfect angle and speed to sate you. He found denying you to be impossible.

He snarls and curses as he holds you down and rails you, determined to make you sing again before he finishes, and to his delight, your heightened sensitivity gives him what he wants. And this time, he couldn't hold on.

Graham kisses you one last time as he groans and gives in, head dropping to your neck again. You didn’t reach a second climax, but stars, what an experience you just had.

When he comes back to himself enough to realise he still had you practically folded in half, he carefully pulls his softening cock free, taking the condom off and taking the strands of hair out of your face as you struggle to catch your breath. You suggest a shared bath, a suggestion he gladly accepts.

Too tired and too sore for pillow talk, comfortable silence falls as your hand finds his, and you lay, listening to each other’s breathing slowly settle.

I could get used to his little snore on my chest, is the last thought that twinkles on your mind before you fall asleep snuggled with him.

[allkinds-oftrash]

To Lady Paige, With Love

A/N: Hello everyone! This is my first time writing for Bridgerton and Regency in general so hopefully it's not too OOC and modernized but do let me know if you have tips to make the writing style seem more regency-like.

Main Pairing: Eloise Bridgerton x FemOC! Paige Crane (Past! Marina Thompson x Paige Crane)

Anyways this came to me as an idea because I just could not stand Phillip in the original To Sir Phillip, With Love and big thanks to @ladiesofwinterfell whose Phillip posts only fuelled my need for a new version of TSPWL. So I wanted to try my hand at writing a genderbent version of him who softer and kinder in her approach when with Marina. Instead, I somehow made a completely new character who happens to be his twin sister Paige. I tried my best to follow the book very closely with of course changes to the point of view and how Marina is treated by Paige. Another thing to note is that I used a mix of the show (especially when crafting Marina's backstory it's straight out of S1) and book's background of the characters.

I'm going to stop babbling now, and happy reading everyone!

Content & Trigger Warnings: Mentions/Descriptions of (Postpartum) Depression, Implied Child Neglect, Suicide Ideation, Suicide Attempt, Teen Pregnancy (?? I dunno if this needed to be tagged as tw but Imma add it anyways), Death and Grief.

Part 2 - Chapter 1: Right Where You Left Me

Prologue: Take Me To The Lakes [14th February 1823]

It shouldn’t have been a sunny day. It was far too beautiful of a day for a tragedy to occur.

A tragedy on Valentine’s Day, it was almost laughable.

Paige had asked the servants to open up Marina’s curtains. She knew the sunlight would do her some good. While waiting for the kitchen staff to prepare a delightful breakfast of pancakes - Marina’s favourite - she decided to check on her flowers. She had grown a lovely patch of Eden roses, specially for her best friend.

Ever since her brother Phillip and her were children, they were enamoured with botany. Phil, of course, immersed himself in the science of it. Paige preferred simple gardening. If she needed information on more complex maintenance of their plants, she knew where to find his textbooks. Over the years, Paige had developed a thumb as green as her brother’s. While Philip used botany as an escape, Paige used it as a way to connect. It was the very same type of roses that helped Paige find her way to Marina.

September 1812

Marina Thompson was a sight to behold. Her corkscrew curls were half pinned up, allowing the bottom wave of curls to be free. Paige couldn’t help but be mesmerised at how well suited her hairstyle was. Marina had a side part, almost covering the left side of her face. She donned the most simple of peach day dresses. Yet to the Crane girl, it seemed to be the most beautiful piece of garment she could have worn. To this day, Paige swears she heard music swell around her the moment she saw Marina bent over, smelling the rose bush.

She takes a deep breath. It helped ground her to muster the confidence to approach the beautiful stranger. The Crane twins have always been shy and reserved. It had done nothing good for them. She was tired of letting life pass her by. Philip could hide in the bushes for all she cared. Today, Paige decided to make a choice. A choice that could potentially bring her happiness. She was going to talk to the girl who made her heart sing.

Taking baby steps, she finally reaches Marina and gives her an awkward smile. When she needed it most, words seemed to fail her. Marina felt Paige’s presence hovering and looked up. She smiled kindly at her and handed over a rose she had plucked. Paige looked down at the rose, in a slight panic. She was rooted to the ground, unable to say or move.

“Good evening, Miss…?” Marina kept her eyes trained on Paige. She trailed her greeting off, hoping to get a name. Paige immediately fell for the warmth in her eyes. She felt safe. That definitely helped to ease her up.

“Crane. Paige Crane.” She cleared her throat awkwardly before introducing herself. She takes the rose from Marina and the two girls shake hands. All Paige could think about was how warm and soft her hand felt. Struggling to say more, she turned her focus to the rose. She twirled it around in her fingers and looked at her companion.

“These are Eden roses, also known as Rosa ‘Pierre De Ronsard’ named after the French poet. However, it was far too pretentious of a name for those out of the French border. So it was renamed Eden Climber to convey the idea of paradise was created by the exceptional beauty of this rose.” She was acutely aware she was rambling. It was the way Marina was watching her intently that brought her comfort. Marina gave her a cheeky smile when she was done with the fun fact.

“An exceptionally beautiful rose for an exceptional beauty.” Marina gestured to Paige. The botanist’s cheeks started to turn as pink as the rose.

“Eden roses from the girl who seemed to have fallen from Eden.” She thought to herself...until she heard Marina chuckle. Paige stared at her, horrified. “I thought out loud, didn’t I?”

Marina nodded, laughing with her whole body now. If Paige could have bottled the sound, she would. Marina grinned at Paige as she looped her arm through hers.

“Don’t be embarrassed. That was a lovely compliment. I think we're going to be wonderful friends, Paige Crane.”

They have been inseparable since.

***

With Phillip away on business for the week, Paige made sure to spend extra time with Marina. She carefully cut the stems of the roses to make a small bouquet. She tied them together and brought them straight to the kitchen. She placed the roses by the pancake plate. She picked up the tray and made her way to Marina's room. She balanced the tray on one hand and knocked with the other as she crossed the threshold.

"Marina, are you awake, love?" Paige asked gently. She stepped closer to her and held out the roses. "I brought you your favourite roses too, Eden Climbers. An exceptional beauty for an exceptional beauty." She echoed the line from their first meeting.

It was love at first sight. She remembered how much fun they had together. Oh where had the time gone? She frowned when she noticed the curtains were shut again. She set down the breakfast tray by her nightstand before making herself comfortable next to Marina lying down.

"If you could walk to shut the curtains, you can sit up to have some breakfast. I had the chef make your favourite." Paige attempted to waft the smell of pancakes in the direction of her companion. Marina simply turned away and stared out at the window. Paige reached out to gently stroke her hair.

Marina had her good and bad days come and go. Paige knew she had to give her space and let her heal on her own. It had been 9 years….this was definitely more serious than postpartum. She was sure of it. Paige gave her a few more minutes before digging into the breakfast herself.

"Rina, I will finish all of the pancakes if you don't come get some!" Paige attempted to sound threatening but her meek voice did her no favours. She caught a silver of a smile on Marina's face. That was all she needed that day. They just had to get through this one moment at a time.

"I saw that, love. Would it be easier if I fed you?"

Marina managed a small nod. She detested feeling like this. Like she was constantly drowning. If everyone thought they couldn't understand why she was this way, she hadn't had the foggiest idea either. Most of all, she hated how it affected Paige. Marina knew she didn't deserve this. Paige deserved a whole person not the shell of a woman she had become. She let out a soft sight and did her utmost best to sit up slightly so they wouldn't get syrup all over the sheets.

Slowly and surely, one bite at a time, Marina finished a full pancake by herself. Paige beamed at her proudly after she was done. Marina took the moment to relish in her smile. Paige always made everything better. Marina might have been depressed but she was no fool. She knew what Phillip thought of her. Even if she spent most days unable to leave her bed, she saw the way he looked at her. Like she was a fragile, broken melancholic thing. He didn't see the person underneath. He only saw the shell. Paige… She knew Marina before the twins came along. She knew the true Marina. The one who laughed and smiled and had known joy. The Marina Thompson that loved Paige Crane with all her heart. That should be reason enough to work hard to recover. To retain who she once was. Paige should be enough.

The botanist saw her companion's vacant eyes and knew she was gone for the day. Paige smiled at her comfortingly. "I ought to check on the children. I shall leave you to rest, dearest. Do ring the bell should you need anything at all." She pressed a soft kiss against her forehead before taking her leave.

As she stepped out looking for the children, Miles directed her to Phillip's greenhouse. The children loved to make mischief there when their father wasn't there. She popped her head into the Greenhouse.

"Amanda! Oliver!" She said sharply to startle them. Seeing them jump out of their bones, she couldn't help but laugh. The twins turned to her and frowned.

"Aunt Paige, that's not funny!" They pouted at her. She snorted.

"Well it was pretty funny when you did it to me yesterday. I'm simply returning the favour, my dears." She chuckled, pulling them into her embrace.

Just as she was about to suggest playing hide and seek by the lake, Amanda squeals. "Mother!" She pointed behind Paige. Paige simply blinked at her niece before slowly turning around.

Marina? It couldn't be. She caught sight of a flash of red. Red. Paige smiled to herself as she shook her head. It must be her. Red was her favourite colour. Marina always said she liked it because it was a strong colour and it made her feel strong.

Paige was filled with joy. Marina had finally gotten the strength to step out. She grabs the children's hands to bring them over to their mother. It would do them good to spend time together outside of her room. The trio was halfway across the field when Paige worked out exactly why Marina had come out. The horrifying epiphany clicked when she saw Marina slip rocked into the pockets of her dress. She immediately turned to the children. They did not have to witness this.

“Children, I need you to do me a favour.” She put on her most calming smile. She kept looking back at Marina to see how far she was away from the lake. “Could you be dears and please fetch Miles for me? Then I need you to go and play in your room. Your mother and I need to speak privately.”

“Why is she walking to the lake?” Amanda questioned. Paige tried to keep her composure. If the children kept questioning, she wouldn’t be able to reach Marina in time.

“I will explain later, please get Miles. It’s urgent.” Paige sent them off running while she sprinted in the other direction the moment they were out of sight.

“MARINA, STOP!” She bellowed at her best friend. She skidded across the field and fell face flat just yards away from the lake. Marina was completely oblivious, submerging herself into the depths of the lake. It was just her and the magnetic pull of the lake. It was like Paige wasn’t even there. She quickly recovered. She didn’t waste time undressing and dove straight into the icy waters to rescue Marina. She’ll be damned if she was going to let the love of her life go without a fight.

She couldn’t find her. Marina had dropped off to the deep end and Paige felt like she couldn’t breathe. She could never forgive herself if Marina succeeded. A glimmer of hope shone through when she caught sight of Marina’s ruby red cloak floating to the surface. Before it could get sucked into the depths of the lake, Paige screamed Marina’s name one last time as an attempt to snap her out of it. Of course, Marina couldn’t hear her. Paige set her sight on the flash of red and swam to it.

Paige did the math; Marina had been under barely a minute. It was probably not enough time to drown, but every second it took her to find Marina was one second toward her death.

She remembered swimming in the lakes with Phillip when they were children countless times. While he still swam and knew the lake better than she did. She had a vague idea where the bottom dropped off. She felt relief when she quickly found the critical point with swift, even strokes. The main obstacle was her dress working against the drag of the water, slowly her down. She cursed, not having stripped before she went in. She did her best to overcome it. Saving Marina was far too important.

She told herself she could find her. She had to find her. Before it was too late.

She found herself diving further down the murky waters. She struggled to keep her eyes open with some of the sand from the bottom swirling around her. Marina must have kicked it up as she went down. The opaque clouds of sand were making it difficult to see. Eventually, relief washed over Paige again when she spotted Marina’s red dress.

She didn’t hesitate to shoot through the waters, down to the bottom where she saw the red of her

cloak floating through the water. Paige felt her heart slow down the moment Marina was in her arms. While they were both petite women, Paige did struggle initially to swim up with Marina. Slowly but surely, she forged their way to the surface. Once she had pulled her onto the grassy knoll of the meadow, she had already lost consciousness and was nothing more than a dead weight in Paige’s arms. She took a moment to take big gasps to fill her aching lungs once again. She made sure she was okay herself before turning to save Marina.

Paige tried shaking her awake, rather violently to get the water out of Marina’s system. Just as she started chest compressions, Miles came running over.

“What happened?”

“She...fell in.” She didn’t even look up at him. She hated how her voice trembled as she said that out loud. She couldn’t bring herself to admit that Marina had gone in on purpose. Marina had chosen to leave her. She knew it was hard on her love but she refused to think about it presently. She was too busy trying to revive her. When the chest compressions felt like a failed task, Paige turned to mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. She blew the air into her mouth, hoping the water would come up her throat.

“Marina, please.” Paige pleaded as she finished her set of resuscitation. All she could do was wait. She finally turned to look at Miles, “Miles darling, could you help me send someone to fetch the doctor.” She requested, exhausted clear in her voice. He nodded swiftly and set on his task. Just as he turned to head to Romney Hall, Marina coughed up the water and started rasping. Paige gasped and squealed in surprise, launching herself into Marina’s arms. She called Miles back to help her guide Marina back home.

“You came back to me.” She whispered with relief, starting to softly sob against Marina’s chest. Marina was tired and she could barely keep her eyes open. Her head lulled against Paige’s.

“It’s okay, we’re going home.” Paige continued and Marina stirred, frowning.

“No…” Now it was her turn to sob, “Please don’t. Let me go, Paige. I don’t want...I don’t….” She struggled to get the words out. As much as she felt guilty for putting Paige through this whole ordeal, her pain outweighed that. The pain outweighed everything: her love for Paige, the children, even Phillip - as much as he misunderstood her. It outweighed her will to love.

Paige watched her flounder helplessly. She hated seeing Marina in so much turmoil. She didn’t want to say anything to make it worse. She just held her close and brushed her hair soothingly. “It’s alright. Let’s just get you warmed up first.”

“I can’t.” She whispered with the last ounce of energy before passing out in Paige’s arms. Paige looked down at her sadly for a moment before looking up at Miles. She shot him a sheepish look and gestured for help. Miles carried her in his arms easily while Paige just watched her with worry the whole walk back.

Once they reached Romney Hall’s foyer, she instructed Miles to send a telegram to Phillip informing him of Marina’s condition. She also called for their housekeeper, Mrs. Hurley. After she had gotten Mrs. Hurley to help her strip Marina of her drenched clothes, the older woman practically shoved Paige to her own room to change into dry clothes. She argued with her, refusing to leave Marina alone for even a moment.

“Go on, dear, I’ll be with her until you return.” Mrs. Hurley shooed Paige out of the room. She huffed and obliged. She dashed to her room to quickly change out of her own icy clothes.

She found one of her old dresses, it was a yellow floral one that Marina loved so much. Marina used to tell her that it brought out the golden flecks in her brown eyes. Paige never liked her brown haired-brown eyed look and found herself to be plain looking. It was only when Marina came along, she felt seen. Maybe being plain didn’t matter when someone loved you in spite of it. Hopeful the dress would stir up old memories, Paige stepped into Marina’s bedroom nervously. She said a silent prayer for her to be well. That the 7 minutes didn’t do that much damage.

Marina was sleeping soundly when Paige entered the room. She couldn’t help but smile at how at peace Marina looked. At that moment, she understood why Marina spent so much time hiding away and sleeping. This was probably the only place in the house that brought her peace. Sleeping brought her peace.

She had Miles check on the twins before she settled into staying by Marina’s side. She wanted to be there every step of her recovery. Then after, they could get her some real help. The twins were plenty occupied with their playtime for the day. While waiting for the doctor, Paige slipped into the bed by Marina’s side. She cradled her head against her chest and prayed. Even though she was a woman of science and was the type of Christian that only attended church during Christmas, praying was one comfort of her religion she allowed herself. She prayed for all her wishes for Marina. For her happiness, recovery...for the good times to hopefully return. As she wished, hoped and prayed, she found herself falling asleep.

When the night came and brought the doctor along with it, Paige woke with a start at the feverishly warm body beside her. The panic set in and the doctor did his best to soothe her. He coaxed her out of the bed so he could check on Marina. Paige was more than happy to oblige but stood hovering over the doctor’s shoulder the whole time.

When he diagnosed her with pneumonia, Paige’s heart sank. That was definitely going to finish the job Marina set out to do in the lake. He saw her expression and comforted her by saying she could very well recover. Essentially, it was a waiting game. Paige made peace with those odds, she would gladly take all the time in the world with her. She spent the rest of the night and the next three days nursing her. She dabbed wet cloth after cloth against her warm forehead. Made sure she had the fluffiest pillows and duvet. She specially had the cook make all of her favourite dishes to go with the broth Marina detested.

Paige wanted to tell her to fight but she didn’t want to push her. Instead she spent the last few days together, helping Marina remember the woman she once was and could be again. Paige wanted her to remember to fight for herself.

The morning after, she sat by Marina’s bedside and smiled tenderly at her.

“Do you remember our first season together?” She asked, her elbow propped against the mattress, her face resting on her palm.

Marina turned to her and looked straight into her eyes. For a moment, she was lucid. “Of course,” She said, coarsely. Paige smiled, that was the best response she had gotten from her in the last few months.

“Best and worst year of our lives, I’d reckon. I was so certain I finally had the courage to tell you how I felt. Only for me to find out you were besotted with George and was pregnant with his child!” She could chuckle about it now but she remembered feeling so awful.

Paige Crane has always known she was different in that aspect. None of the boys growing up ever caught her attention. When she became a woman, out during her first season, she couldn’t relate to the way other girls had talked about their suitors. Nothing about the male species ever stirred anything romantic within her. They were just really good friends to her. Women, on the other hand, gave her all the feelings the human emotional spectrum allowed. She wanted to love them and worship them forever. When she met Marina at Romney Hall for the first time smelling the rose bushes, it had confirmed everything she already knew. She loved women. A regular Anne Lister.

She spent a few years loving Marina until her father had sent her away to stay with her London cousins, The Featheringtons. When she heard Marina was moving, she immediately sought out her mother.

“I couldn’t bear to part with you so I convinced Mother to let me debut that season in the city.” She chuckled, recounting the lengths she went to be close to her.

“I’m glad you did.” Marina croaked, the water still hurting her lungs. Now that she felt like speaking to Paige, her body was failing her. She managed a small smile and slipped her hand into hers. She definitely remembered their first season together. It was the best time… til everything quickly went downhill with the news of George’s death, being pregnant with the twins and feeling so alone. Paige was the light in all of that darkness, she had helped pull her out of the loneliness.

Paige grinned back wildly. "I think that's the first full sentence I've heard you speak in the last few months." She nudged her teasingly.

"Oh hush." She attempted to be annoyed but started coughing violently. Paige immediately shot up.

"I'm going to fetch the doctor."

"I just need some water, darling." She coughed once more. Then took a deep breath and managed a smile to show she was fine, despite her exhaustion. Paige nodded and went to fetch her a glass.

As Marina watched Paige walk out the door, she thought back to how much everything had changed in the last 10 years. It only felt like yesterday they had debuted and Marina had tried to marry Colin Bridgerton. Oh, what a mess that was. She was so consumed by her love and grief for George, she missed what was right in front of her.

It took Marina a long time to realise it but she loved men and women the same. Paige was definitely the first woman to stir up romantic feelings within her. It also took her a while to realise loving Paige doesn't count the love she held for George. He would always be the father of her children. Paige was the love of her life.

She never expected to be like this. She always thought she would be a good mother, full of life and happy. Happy was such an overrated emotion, Marina thought bitterly. It's not something that happens, it's something you work for. You make happiness for yourself. She knew that all too well. She spent the better part of the last decade fighting off her grief and postpartum with no success.

Paige reminded her to take comfort in the good days. It was rather jarring to Martina how she was experiencing a somewhat good day after all these months. Especially the day right after she made an attempt on her life.

"Penny for your thoughts, darling?" Paige asked, handing over the glass. Marina gulp it down quickly and set the cup aside.

"Just...how we got here. I thought it would be…" she ponders over the word, "different."

"Hmm," Paige hummed, "You're telling me. We could have had quite the life if I was a man. I could have married you instead of Phillip." She wrinkled her nose. She really does love her brother, Lord only knows. And Paige is pretty sure it's a crime to hate your twin. But she absolutely despised the way Phillip treats Marina. Or rather not - he completely abandoned her in the last few years.

It's no secret that Phillip and Marina's marriage was one of convenience, security and protection for Marina. Of course, Romney Hall needed heirs and so two birds. But, he could at least pretend to care for her.

"I could have become a spinster like you. We could have been the two crazy spinsters that lived in Romney Hall together." Marina chuckled. Paige beamed at her. It had been so long since she had heard that wondrous laugh.

"I'm not a spinster!" She clasped Marina's hands in hers. "We may not be married on paper but I couldn't imagine spending my life with anyone else. I can't imagine...loving anyone else." Paige looked deep into her eyes. Marina shivered slightly. Her lover had a way of looking directly into your soul.

Paige knew what the doctor had said. That Marina could possibly recover but her gut was telling her something else. She was hit with the sudden realisation that she could lose her. The love of her life.

"Please fight this, Marina. I know you can. Look at today, it was a good day. You just need to survive the pneumonia and you can start over. We'll erase the last 7 years. Slowly but surely, we can manage your melancholy. You're so much more than it, my love. You know that. Your children deserve to know that."

Paige didn't realise how increasingly desperate she sounded until she began pleading with her. She found her face wet with fresh tears. Marina reached out to wipe the tears of her face.

"I'll try." She said quietly.

"That's all I ask, thank you. I love you, Marina." She leaned over to kiss her. Kissing her back, Marina sighed against her lips. "I love you too."

That night Marina lied awake, watching Paige's chest rise up and down. Marina smiled at her little snores. Just as she felt a glimmer of happiness laying beside her love, the guilt washed over her. She didn't want to promise anything. While today reminded her of the hope she felt to feel alive, deep down she knew it was temporary. She couldn't see herself living past tomorrow.

Sure enough, she was dead in two days.

****

[Read Part 2 Here]

[aileysmirnov]

Loki x Ailey hc! part 1

I was watching Thor Ragnarok with some friends (over zoom ofc) and then It popped up in my head a conversation that I had with @melyaliz and Alex (ig: shir.0_guru) a while back, and I couldn't shake it off my brain as I was trying to write some other thing. So hopefully writing this down would apace my mind.

TW: Arranged marriage, depictions of emotional/psychological abuse

Summary: Eris and Odin find a solution to what's been threatening their domains, an alliance between 2 of the most powerful families, but Ailey and Loki don't seem so keen about it.

Disclaimer/notes: Ailey is my OC! You can learn more about her in here!

Ailey has finally been reunited with most of her family and entered the realm of gods in this AU.

Samaras is the last name of the Eris family, they are rulers of Thera (Eris kingdom) and each member bears a royal title.

Ailey is the only demi-goddess in her family, Demigods are seen as shameful in this AU and usually they have a birthmark and a weakness that distinguishes them as such. In Ailey's case is her golden rose hair once she transforms in her god-form and her weakness is her allergy to gold, it practically burns her skin, debilitates her magic and herself, is like kryptonite for her.

◆◇◆◇◆◇◆◇

The only reason they even know about the other, is because of their parents: Eris had been in conflict with Ares lately, and one of his recent attacks greatly debilitated her army and Odin had trouble with a few of the realms under his command forming complots against him and the safety of Asgard.

Both rulers found themselves in need of the other: Odin had the greatest warriors and military at his service, and Eris being the goddess of discord could easily rise or disipate any conflict that may come her way (except for Ares ofc), an easy way in or out of war.

And so, they decided to form an alliance; But Odin being the wise men he is, knew better than to trust blindly in the goddess of chaos, after all...Eris was known for being a backstabber who acted only to beneficiate her own interests.

To prevent that, Odin decided to make the alliance under the condition that one member of the Samaras family must marry the second son: Loki, God of mischief. And so, Eris agreed and offered her youngest daughter: Ailey goddess of ruin and folly.

God it was an absolute mess since the beginning!

Frigga was the one to inform Loki, who immediately went to Odin to protest, but like always his father ignored him, shutting him down by comparing him to his brother and how he would do anything to protect Asgard but Loki was being selfish.

Ailey in the other hand was kept ignorant of such decision and only knew about it a few hours before the engagement party began and only because a servant accidentally told her.

She was furious and much like Loki tried to protest but Eris couldn't care less about her daughter's opinion.

Ailey could rage all she wanted, Eris wasn't even paying attention, the only thing she was accomplishing was in making her angry.

—Child, I think you tend to forget your place in this world, you see: among humans you might be...special but in here... you're just an idiot with too much privilege—Eris had a way with words that could make them feel like poison, creeping in to the insecurities of one's heart.

—If it weren't for me and your brothers, you would be Hera's new toy, so please remember, dear. You not only owe me but to your brothers and this kingdom as well.

Ailey headed back to her room feeling ashamed and angry, she felt her mother's words had some truth in them, seeing as how different she was viewed here in comparison to the human realm.

When the time came for the engagement party and for Ailey and Loki to meet for the first time, is fair to say neither of them were in a good mood.

Even though deep inside they knew both of them didn't have any say in the matter and were pretty much in the same situation; they still felt irrationally mad at each other, that's why since the moment they met to the end of the ceremony they would throw little passive-aggressive remarks at each other.

She viewed him as a pretentious asshole, and He saw her as a spoiled brat.

Almost near the end of the celebration and no announcement had been made so Eris took it upon herself to throw them into the spotlight.

—I believe you two have something important to share with all of us—her face was smiling but her eyes were threatening.

Ailey bit the inner side of her cheek, rolled her eyes as she turned to face Loki who only gave an exasperated sigh before speaking in a monotone voice

—Do you want to marry me?—he didn't even bothered to get on one knee and just extended the ring for her to take.

Ailey felt tempted to say "no" and walk away gracefully but doing that would probably have a negative impact on Thera, so after a long pause she answered.

—Whatever—and put the ring on, herself.

Clearly a good start :) .

I think they didn't saw each other that much afterwards and when they did it was mostly for wedding arrangements in which they continued with the passive-aggressive comments but this time about everything the other would pick.

The mood was so uncomfortable every time they were together everyone around them was like:

I think that sometimes they would have moments where they realize they had been too harsh with the other and would tone it down a little but treating each other like that was the only way of protest that was allowed for them.

Specially for Loki since he constantly had to travel to Thera bc for some reason unknown to him Ailey refused to go to Asgard, which only made his negative opinion on her grow.

In his mind, it was probably because she thought she was too good for Asgard but the reality was: Asgard is practically a death sentence for Ailey since 90% of every building in there was made of gold.

But she will never tell him that.

I think their first "moment of closeness" came to be purely out of the realization neither of them had any option other than get married or see their domains destroyed.

So, they decided to call it a truce: both would play along with the whole marriage fiasco for a while until things died down and then they could divorce and pretend they never even met.

And so, the passive-aggressive comments slowly died down, not that they started acting like lovers all of a sudden, instead they acted like they were just... co-workers or something.

They would greet each other in a formal manner and then only talked about the arrangements and left, nothing else.

But then, inevitably they started to get closer.

It was something so gradual none of them really knew how it happened.

It started off with small comments about decoration ideas for the venue, it turns out they both had quite the interest in interior design.

Eventually those small comments became lengthy conversations about which combination of colors would look the best.

When it came down to learning about the nobility attending the wedding on each side, both would spend a little more time together. Studying the proper way on how to address them and their interests all for the possibility in forming new alliances.

But I feel like instead they would roast the hell out of them, like they would be going through a list of the Asgardian nobility that were to attend and Ailey would just point at a picture of a random Asgardian noble and go: "Oh. My. God. what is he even wearing?"

And Loki would try to force back a smile or a laugh but eventually he would just give in and start joining Ailey in the roasting.

They also have a very similar sense of humor, but Ailey is just more blunt and open about it while Loki isn't, I feel like most of the time he has genius comebacks to stupid comments people make but he's a gentleman and normally just keeps it to himself or would only say it in a polite but slightly aggressive manner, so when Ailey just bluntly says something similar to what he was thinking he can't help but laugh a bit (he won't admit to it though)

Other things Ailey and Loki have in common is their love for drama and spectacle, while Ailey is more of a ballet/dance-based plays person, she understands Loki’s enthusiasm for theater and books even sharing some of it herself.

Not only they enjoy these things, but they also found comfort in them: For Ailey ballet began as something her mother forced upon her but transformed in an outlet for her emotions and a way to connect and control her powers.

For Loki theater was a form of escapism since he was a child, every time he felt like he didn’t belong he found a safe place in countless stories of the misunderstood heroes.

This only makes their bond grow deeper; up until this point they never had anyone to talk to about their interests in such depth, so now they talk all the time about it, sometimes they would surprise themselves looking forward to the next meeting just to gush about a new play or book they just saw or read.

I feel like Loki might’ve even lend Ailey some copies of his favorite books and Ailey as a “thank you” decided to sneek out with him to the human realm to watch "Tristan und Isolde".

Everyone is able to notice the change in attitude of these two, especially Thor who only had heard about the girl but could tell how happy she made him every time Loki would mention her.

And he was happy for his brother but felt curious about his soon to be sister-in-law.

So, it was only natural when Thor asked Loki if he could tag along the next time he went to Thera.

He said no.

Thor went anyways.

When Ailey met him, she could only think about one thing: "he himbo" which she thought was cute btw.

Thor could see why Loki liked this girl so much, they were practically the same, which he found sweet yet amusing.

—Lady Ailey, a pleasure to meet you, mi brother has told me a lot about you!—he stated.

—Really?!—Ailey questioned directing an incredulous glance at Loki. 

—He asked­—Loki tried to defend himself by downplaying his brother statement. 

—No, I didn’t.—Thor retaliated with a mocking smile, he could tell his brother felt embarrassed so he decided to tease him a bit more. 

—In fact, he won’t shut up about you. 

—That’s not true, he’s just.. 

—No, he’s all the time saying Ailey this, Ailey that. It peaked my curiosity and so here I am… 

—Brother, Could you shut up?—Ailey could only smile and hold back a laugh at the brothers spontaneous quarrel. 

Truth is she thought it was sweet of Loki to talk about her with his brother. And teases him about it afterwards.

I think Thor might talk privately with Ailey and would ask her to take care of his brother. 

—I know Loki can be a bit…difficult, but have patience with him, I can tell he really likes you. 

And Thor was correct, Loki really did like her. But it might take a while for him to come to terms with his feelings, and would only manifest in small gestures towards Ailey, like: tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, subconsciously offering his arm for her to take as support when walking down the stairs, placing a hand on the small of her back as guidance whenever they were in a crowded space, sneaking small glances at her, etc.

Overall, he starts acting a lot softer with her, a lot more caring.

Ailey might be a bit oblivious to this (since she’s only used to overly sexual advances and has a difficult time understanding genuine affection), but she appreciates it none the less.

And both might even find themselves thinking that maybe…just maybe spending the rest of their lives together isn’t a bad idea after all.

[itshesdimples]

-Hello to anyone reading. This is my first time writing something and putting it out for the world to see. That being said, I would love any constructive criticism you have to give me. Thank you for any support you may give me, I cant thank you enough xoxo ~H - 

I remember the day as if it were yesterday; the day you crossed the unimaginable line. 

I thought we had everything, I thought I was your everything. 

2 MONTHS AGO

"Hey sunshine, just calling to let you know I wont be able to make it home this time. I'm sorry, the label has me doing something that I'm not sure is a good idea but they say it will help me in the long run." He sighs at the end, I imagine him palming his forehead.

"Look, I need you to listen to me when I tell you that you are everything to me, you make me want to become the best version of myself. During the months we have been together I have seen the best and worst side of you and I'm not running, promise. I want you to be mine forever, do you hear me? Just remember that." Harry expelled.

You were a little worried, seeing as you two had been together for a little over nine months and it was extremely rewarding. The time apart has always been different to the other relationships she had been in the past but with Harry it seemed like more than she had ever received from the previous men. 

As a surgical intern you work countless hours and never really get more than a few hours to yourself, so when you met Harry you really never saw it going anywhere. You were just too happy for your own good, openly expressing your life to perfect strangers and expecting them all to be accepting of who you are.

* 9 MONTHS AGO* 

The hospital you worked at allotted 80 hours a work week and as hopeful as you may be feeling, there is a little voice in the back of your head telling you not to go bar hopping. "Just one drink and then water." you emphasize to your good friend Mike, the bartender. 

"Vodka soda coming right up, Dr. Demanding." He chuckles. You turn around in the chair and stare at all the fellow drunks, looking for your intern comrades who should be here by now. 

Although you dont find your friends, you spot a very handsome, familiar face coming toward you. Admiring the face across from you, you decide to take the first step following by the downing of your vodka soda. " You dont seem to be familiar with the very famous bar here in town so you must not be from around here," you tease, holding out your hand to shake. "I'm [Y/N]. Not to sound weird but have we met before?" You get a very bold feeling of deja vu but laugh it off. "I'm sorry, my friends are supposed to be here by now and I'm socially handicapped, sometimes I dont know when to stop talking." Now you're just rambling at the breathtaking man in front of you and feeling red in the cheeks. 

"Its alright love, I sometimes feel socially handicapped around exquisite women such as yourself. Actually, that sounded like you're one of hundreds but I-- what I meant to say was that, you seem a little lonely. Can I buy you a drink?" He rambles, tugging at his jacket. 

"I am only allowed one drink, I know it sounds weird but I'm on a ticking time bomb, you see this?" You pull out your pager, "any moment this thing will go off and I have to skip back to work like a dreamy little school girl but inside I am dying of starvation, need a beer and twenty hours sleep." You just keep spitting up word vomit and your face is permanently pink but you just cant stop because what if it gets quiet? Now that's when it gets awkward.

"I don't think we have ever met because I'd remember you" Harry confirms, looking you up and down your shapely body. "What do you do for a living that has you on such a tight leash?" Taking a sip of his beer, he stands up and walks next to the chair you're sitting in. 

"Surgical intern, Dr. [Y/L/N] at your service, sir." You cant help but crack a little bit of the tension you have building up in your stomach while talking to him but that doesn't stop you from staring him in the eyes and trying your best to flirt. 

The aura around him is too intoxicating, too much to handle without trying to add a little humor in the mix. "I like it when you call me sir, Dr. [Y/L/N] but how long have you been a doctor? I'd love to get to know you before you have to leave me." He articulates, trying to captivate her attention.

"I love my job but it has been a long winded road, it feels like years but I've only been a real doctor for a little over two months. It takes a lot out of me but that is why I'm glad I have two great friends who I can lean on. We keep each other afloat and they're also my roommates. I don't know where I would be without them." All of that poured out of my mouth before I had the chance to cork it but I couldn't help telling him something about myself that was at least surface level.

He just seems like an eerie case of the best illusion I've ever seen. I cant help but shake the feeling that I've known him all my life, like telling him the ins-and-outs of my life wouldn't be detrimental to my health. 

"Now tell me something about yourself. For starters maybe your name? I've never seen you here before and I'm here all the time so I'm pretty good at knowing who is an out of towner, and I don't know how much time I have left." You're trying to get to know him and that is so unlike you. Having had boyfriends in the past, you were never the one asking the questions or wanting to get to know them more than a few dates and drinks. The longest relationship you have ever had was two months and you two went to high school together. 

"Hi I'm Harry, and I don't know how much longer I get to sit next to you so please can I have your number, sunshine? I would love to take you for dinner sometime soon." Harry is going out on a whim asking for your phone number but keeps going, "From what I have gathered you are a very busy woman and I admire that, love it even. I know this sounds crazy but I feel like I know you already and I have never felt that with another person so please give me a chance, I will work around your schedule. I dont care what it--" he is stopped when your pager goes off as an emergent patient being admitted, all hands on deck you assume. 

"Sunshine, huh? I like it." You wink at him and ask Mike for a pen so you can scrawl your number on a napkin and thank Harry for a very pleasant chat. It was good to know that he felt for you, as you did him after just meeting the man, and his nickname for you was adorable. 

For the next two weekends you spent getting to know Harry on a personal note. He told you he loved writing music, performing and was already an amazing talent. Harry showed you his latest music and you wondered how you hadn't connected the dots sooner. You knew he was a very private person, as he told you on your first date. 

(FLASHBACK)

"I'd love to get to know your friends, and see what kind of person you are. I can't wait to know you but I just want you to know that I can't have a lot of people knowing what is going on in my personal life." He sighs, you two sat down at dinner and he couldn't help but spit out what he wanted to tell you when you first met. "I don't want to sound pretentious or come off as someone who cares about his appearance to others but I have to tell you that I make music for a living and have quite the lot of fans. Screaming fans to be exact, " he chortles, asking the waiter for a bottle of wine to start off, "but I can't help but love them all. They made my career but I have to remain a private person. I adore my fans but they are very protective and I don't want our relationship to struggle because of a few of them saying unkind things." He grabs your hand and looks you in the eyes, trying to make you understand the reason for privacy.

"I've never met anyone like you Harry and I meet a lot of people on the regular. You have this way about you that draws me in and I want to get to know you. If that means that I cannot post my gushing about you on social media, so be it. I really like you and would like to know who you are." You declare, hoping he understands that he as a person means more than everyone understanding her lifestyle choices. 

(END OF FLASHBACK) 

Tonight was the night you knew you wanted to understand him on an even more personal level. You knew that the way you felt for him wasn't a normal crush, wasn't even a normal type of love. You knew he had the power to hurt you if he wished to do so but that was so far in the back of your mind. He meant so much to you already that it didn't matter you two were keeping your relationship a secret from most of the world, apart from a select few. It was the best date of them all, Harry cooked you and your best friends dinner so when you got off work, dinner was on the table. He was always so thoughtful of your needs and you thought it was the time to prioritize his.

"Take me to bed Harry." You whimper, "I want you." 

*7 MONTHS LATER* 

Things were hectic in your life but that was the way they always were but now it seemed like days stretched past 24 hours and turned into a marathon sprint that never ended. 

The day Harry unmistakably broke you was the day that sleep had everything on you. Going for days on end was something you were accustomed to but after he cut you deeper than you could ever be, sleep seemed to be your only friend. 

You thought you knew him better than anyone. He was your Harry, your everything, even your person maybe? 

But when his decision to take his career to the next step interfered in your relationship, your life; that was the day to call it quits no matter the devastation. He may have been your soulmate but maybe, just maybe it wasn't right. The timing, the place of it all was just too much. Your life just didn't have room for much else, especially someone who was willing to hurt you unimaginably and not walk away in order to lessen the blow. 

*2 WEEKS BEFORE THE INEVITABLE *

"Hey sunshine, just calling to let you know I wont be able to make it home this time. I'm sorry, the label has me doing something that I'm not sure is a good idea but they say it will help me in the long run." He sighs at the end, I imagine him palming his forehead.

"Look, I need you to listen to me when I tell you that you are everything to me, you make me want to become the best version of myself. During the months we have been together I have seen the best and worst side of you and I'm not running, promise. I want you to be mine forever, do you hear me? Just remember that." Harry expelled.

That was two hours ago and within those two hours you knew it was best to stay off your phone. You keep telling yourself to not look for anything leading you to clues about his voice mail. It wasn't like him to express his feelings over the phone, he was an in person 'declare-my-love-for-you' type of man so when you listened to it you thought it was best to stay off your phone. 

Trailing off to the shower in pursuit of getting to work, you hear your phone's inescapable shrill from your bedroom and decide to opt away from contact to that thing. 

As soon as you leave for work is when your heart stops, skips a few beats and then plummets into your stomach. 

"Harry Styles in a relationship with Camille Rowe? That is the best thing I have heard all week. The star tells us that they met months ago and kept it a secret in order to get to know each other. We cant wait for updates on their relationship. Now on to the juic--" That's all you can hear for the rest of the day, ringing in your mind like it is an announcement on the P.A. at work for all to hear. 

You knew that was the end of everything. Devastation didn't even hit the mark, it was like everything in the world was on fast forward and you were still trying to get through the commercials. Nothing made sense any more, the glass was no longer half full. It was completely drained and then smashed on the ground into a million little pieces. That was how her whole body felt, like it was just shattered on the ground, irreparable. 

The damage was done and there was nothing holding you back from wailing like a siren in front of all of the patients waiting for surgery, but your best friends always had your back. Making sure you eat during lunch and taking you to the bar at the end of your shift so you can drink the bottle dry. 

Just shy of a half hour sitting at the bar was when you were cut-off by Harry running into the bar rambling about how he thought they were spinning the tabloids another way. 

"I thought they were going to report that we just met and were already dating, I would have never let them ruin what we had by saying I knew her while you and I were together. I told them exactly what to say! I don't even know her, we just met." He jumbles his sentences trying to get hold of his clear message. 

You stand up from your seated position and start motioning for him to join you outside. Once out there, you decide what is best moving forward. 

"While we were together?" You scoff, trying to be as civil as can be under your obvious exhaustion, throwing your hands up in exasperation.

"At least you said something truthful in the last two minutes you decided to interrupt my break. Yes, you and I are no longer together. Honestly we should have never started something, our careers couldn't be more opposite and honestly I cannot afford to ruin my career over someone who wants to build his on lies. So thank you for what we had but from now on I would like to move forward, away from you." You keep talking in order to get your point across, hoping that when all is said and done there will be closure on both ends. 

You know that Harry does care for you but in these last twenty four hours you've learned is that maybe you can't have it all. Maybe happily-ever-afters are only for the imagination. 

Maybe life throws things at you so you can overcome them but there are times like these when she wonders what the message is supposed to be? 

Is there a message? 

That you can have one person in your life that should be your forever but just cant fit in there? 

"I know we never said it but I do love you, I think I always will but we can't make it fit. The time we spent together was great and I hope there is a lesson in there somewhere. I can only believe that closure is what we need now." She grabs on to his shoulder and goes in for a hug to end the conversation but he pulls back,"How could you think that we need closure? What we need is each other. I need you, in my life with me forever. You are always going to be the only one for me, I just know it." He grabs on to her and holds for dear life, hoping that he can convey her to stick it out for them both. 

"I know what I'm feeling is selfish because I never want to hurt you but my career is part of my life and I can't run away from who I am but I want you in my life, always. I will never stop loving you." Harry pulls away and looks in her eyes with tears in his," I cannot fathom a life without my sunshine. Maybe the timing is wrong but cant we make it right?" 

[Y/N] pulls away, trying to compose herself and make the most rational decision. She needs to think about her life and what she needs, not anyone else. "Harry Styles, while being with you was the best rollercoaster ride of my life, and if I could stay on forever I would do so; I have to get off. I need to pull away for the sake of my head and heart. Being with you makes me happy but when it interferes with my work, which is saving lives, I have to be on one hundred percent all the time. You have clouded my thoughts and judgement, and while being a star is part of who you are, being a doctor is me so I cannot give up who I am. Sometimes maybe love isn't enough?" By this point you can't hold back the sobs you have held in since you knew the inevitable truth and holding them back would be foolish, so you let them come. 

Harry tries to grab onto you with the little strength he has left from crying and lack of sleep. "I cannot let you get away. You are my everything! I canno--" he tries to catch his breath in between the racks of his heart," please, please do not leave me [Y/N]. We can make this work. I love you and that is enough, it is enough for me. Please." Harry whispers the last part, crouching in front of you and trying to hold you to him. 

"It isn't enough for the both of us Harry, and you know it." You're trying to hold back until you can be alone. All you want is to crawl in bed and become dead to the world because that's how you feel right about now. " I will always love you and maybe one day that love will be enough but right now I just don't see how that is possible Harry. I can't rationalize what is happening in our relationship and tell you that we will make it through it. The best thing to do is cut our ties before we start to resent each other." You take one last breath, looking at your friends inside the bar. You signal to them that you're leaving, and say the one thing that you know will hurt the most. 

"I can't try anymore to be with you so this is my goodbye. I wish you the best Harry, I really do." In the middle of all this you had a death grip on his hands but now is the time to walk away from one of the best things to happen to you. As gut wrenching as it is, the best thing for the both of them was to move on. Worry about the time in their career when it is at the peak so as hurtful as it is, she knows that she is doing what's best. 

You pull away from his grasp, looking down at him kneeling on the ground and kiss his forehead. "I love you." You whisper through tears. 

All you can hear behind you is wails of sirens, drunk people cheering on the football game inside but the one thing that is the loudest is Harry's cries. As soon as you walk away you break down into a blubbering mess. Your friends catch up after you, while looking at the mess you and Harry made behind. You can hear Harry's cries of desperation and the only thing your heart is telling you to do is 'go back, go back to him' but you know it's not logical. 

If it is meant to be you will make it work at a better time. Things will come together and make sense one day but not when her mind is a fuzzy mess. Maybe weeks, months or years later she will understand what it means to have love be enough. It has to mean something right? 

Good byes may hurt but sometimes they are unsurpassable. Sometimes they come barreling into your life totally unexpected and ruin something you thought could be forever. 

[arthemis-forge]

Chapter 3 Body and Soul (Crimson)

Warnings: None (future nsfw)

A/N: Hello guys! Sorry for the delay, what happens is that I was a little busy with some personal things but I'm back.

I will try to update twice a week and each time as we progress through the story, make the chapters longer. Another thing is I didn't notice that the previous chapter i published the draft instead of the final version. Which had many otorgraphic and writing errors. But it's already corrected. If you find something let me know so I can fix it. Also I am very happy for all the support, thank you for your lovely comments. Another thing, Do you want me to create a tag list?. Please tell me in the comments. That's all I wanted to say. Enjoy your reading! 🖤

Chapter 3(Crimson)

Lost in my thoughts, I walked towards the exit of the building while i was looking at the sky with some concern. It wouldn't be long before the sun rise.

And honestly, I was very scared. I did'nt know anyone in this city and didn't know what time it was in the area. My life was in danger and although I was sure that I still had time based on what the sky looked like.

I was still very worried about not knowing what time it was exactly. Looking at my watch was in vain. It was scheduled for London time not New York.

I was very nervous but I had to calm down. So i calculated that there were 2 hours left until the sun rise. And although it sounds like it's a lot of time, I don't know how much traffic there is in this city. And I needed to be in the nearest hotel as soon as posible.

Again I was so lost in my thoughts that I did not notice that a taxi parked in front of me, it was not until I heard the drivers voice that I noticed it.

—Good night miss, are you waiting for someone else? Or do you need me to take you somewhere? —

Hearing that question made me feel more relaxed again.

—Sure, I actually have nowhere to go. Could you recommend a hotel near here. One with good facilities. The price point doesn’t matter but I really need to get a good place to relax, preferably the closest hotel to the airport.—

I told him as I opened the door and carried my suitcase.

—Of course ma'am, in fact we are close to many good hotels. They are a few streets away. Would you like me to take you to see the exteriors and based on how they look you choose one?. I assure you that they are all very good, some more than others but none are bad. —

The man smiled while he waited for my answer.

I sighed feeling realised.

—Yes please, I would like it very much. —

The man laughed as he drived the car.

—You are not from here are you? I can tell by your accent. —

I nodded as i looked out the window. Analyzing the area I was in.

—That's right, I'm from London. I was transferred from my job. —

—That's so interesting. Sounds like fun to have a job where you travel a lot. —

—Well yeah you're not wrong. But I also needed to start a new life. —

I confessed while we entered to a large avenue with many buildings with hotels and apartments. Some were prettier than others.But nothing look bad about them.

—Is one of you liking? Or do you want me to go further so you can see more options?. —

The truth is that I could already choose one of the many hotels that were on the street. And I couldn't be so demanding, since i needed a safe place away from natural light as soon as possible. But a hunch told me to accept the man's proposal.

—Sure, I think we can see a few more options.—

No matter how much the car moved forward, nothing interested me. It wasn't until we reached the corner of the avenue that a large black building with Victorian architecture caught my attention. On the outside it had an ad with red calligraphy that said "Crimson".

—Stop here, I like this one. —

I pointed to the old building.

—I’m sorry to tell you this, but that hotel is very strict. They do not allow the entry to anyone who doesn't have a membership. It has already happened several times that I leave people here and they end up removing them from the place.—

—Don't worry I will try to enter. If i can´t then I’ll choose one of the hotels that are on this street. How much do I owe you? —

—If you insists, it’s $30 dollars.—

I nodded as I handed over his money.

—Thank you very much, also keep the change. —

I took my suitcase and closed the car's door as I approached the entrance of the building. However I was stopped at the door by a very tall man with brown hair and grey eyes.

— Good night, Miss. Could you give me your membership please. —

Embarrassed, I bit my lower lip and then proceeded to do something I didn't wanted.

—You're going to let me in no matter the rules of the place or what your bosses say. —

I smiled already knowing the results of my action. The man nodded and then open the door for me.

Once inside I noticed that a tall girl with black hair and violet eyes smiled at me as she applauded me.

—That was so wesome, Alice. Just as I expected, James didn't cause you any trouble. —

The girl approached very excited.

—Who are you and why do you know my name?—

I asked very confused and feeling insecure. Since she was aware of what I had just done and the worst thing was that she knew my name. This was getting very strange and I was not liking it.

—I am Grace Crimson. Owner of the hotel and great friend of your Boss Nat. —

—Do you know Nat? —

I said in a very incredulous voice.

—Of course Alice. But hey that is the least important thing right now, let me show you your room and I give you Nats phone number so you can call her.—

While I was trying to process the information, one of the attendants took my suitcase.

—Did Nat tell you in any way that I will come here? —

She just laughed at my question.

— I knew you'd say that. Don't be silly, honey. You are acting like a newborn vampire in the clan. Look dear, I'll explain. I can see the future. Today I had a vision of you in which I saw you giving orders to my guard right outside my hotel. It should be noted that I was concerned, because I didn't knew who you were, so I called all the offices until I found some information about you. To at least make sure that you weren't dangerous to us and to be able to take the necessary measures. By the way, I don't want you to feel bad about what I told you. But these are difficult times and we must take care of each other. —

Of course she was right, what a fool I was. I have been so involved in my personal feelings and problems that I overlook the fact that many in our community have that ability.

—Don't worry, it's okay Grace. I understand. I know how the security protocol works. And I also understand perfectly that you investigated me and that you needed to know who I was. —

I confessed.

—I already knew you were going to say that tho. Hey you are more friendly and understanding than I expected from someone who can control people's minds with their voice. No ofence but your kind is usually a very pretentious. —

I couldn't help laughing at that comment.

—I was like that many years ago, but someone changed me. I try not to abuse my powers too much, only when it’s necessary. —

I lowered my gaze to caress a silver ring with a red diamond that I had on my ring finger.

When she saw how my mood changed, she immediately hug me.

—Don't torment yourself over the past. —

She took me by the hand to walk me through those long corridors of the building. I must admit that I felt a little emotional. The place reminded me a lot of my grandmother's house.

—Here is your room, as you can see it is very spacious, it has a king size bed, living room, bathroom with a bathtub and a beautiful balcony. Also here is Nat's phone number. And don't forget to close all the curtains including the ones on the bed. —

She handed me the keys, a red card and a pos it with Nat’s new number.

—James leave the suitcase on her bed. —

The man obeyed her order and put the suitcase on my bed.

—Sure Grace. Thank you very much for all the hospitality. It has been a long time since I felt welcomed in a place. —

She smiled

—I know we are going to be very good friends. —

After that she closed the door behind me.

It's amazing how someone's life could change in an instant.

One day you are in London crying for your ex and the next day you are in New York and you're dreaming with a man who doesn’t even exist.

Thinking about that, I began to close all the curtains in the room and then i took the phone from the bureau next to the bed.

With some fear I called her, I knew that she would be very upset with me. But i had to do it.

—Hey nat it's me, Alice. —

—You are an idiot, I was so worried! Never do that to me ever again! I thought you wanted to kill yourself or something like that...

You sounded so sad. God you have take some therapy you can't continue living like this...—

I sigh very annoyed.

— Anyway, I already spoke with Bruce and he already gave you permission to work in New York. And before I forget to tell you this. Tomorrow you have a job to do. I need you in a bar, we think we found someone who can serve us for the clan. You will have to go to a concert near a local bar in the town. Grace will leave you the papers with the man's information.—

—Perfect. By the way, thank you very much for the favor. You don't know how grateful I am with you. Anyways, I will leave you, I am very tired and I would like to sleep as much as possible to be in the best possible conditions tomorrow—

—Of course dear. Have a good night. —

Grateful to Nat, I hung up the call and then closed my eyes. But not without first remembering Peter's beautiful green eyes.