#not the original knobs for the record but they came from my nightstand and look rly cute imo

[volfoss]

Thoughts on what color would look good w these knobs...

[little-writings]

I love seeing your fics pop up in the Jumin tag, I always take the time of my day to read them! Do you think you could do a ficlet where MC gets amnesia and forgets about Jumin? (I guess you could say like a reverse situation of the fic Jumin getting amnesia, hhaha) Please and thank you!

Okay, so since I still really think that there is a lot that could come from amnesia fics I’m going to try something different that is probably not really thought of when it comes to these sort of fics.

I will be going with an idea brought up with the film Before I Go to Sleep, minus the whole horror aspect. I highly recommend the movie although it does deal with subjects involving traumatic experiences so please take caution!!! 

With that being said, I hope you enjoy and have a wonderful day! Thank you

———————————————————————————————————–

Morning drifted into your gaze as your lids flickered open, worry seeping as a sudden thought poured into your head.

This wasn’t your home. 

Unfamiliar decorations scattered the room, photos of you and a man you didn’t recognize flowers you’d never chosen, and a window you’d never looked out of in your whole life.

But what horrified you more was the unknown arm blanketed around you, holding you close to whoever was next to you.

And as you turned your head, you came to meet him.

He was fast asleep, his breathing light and content, curly, messy strands of sooty hair sweeping about his features.

You gingerly lifted his arm from your own, swinging your legs over the bed and rising to your feet, staggering into what you thought was the bathroom, eyes widening as you saw what waited.

Spread across the wall was a mural. 

A mural of photos of you and the mysterious man.

Pictures of you in a wedding gown, him embracing you as if you were his greatest treasure, both of you smiling and laughing.

Pictures of you and him cradled together on the sofa, out and about in a city you hadn’t recognized, the two of you at dinner, or simply just a photo of the both of you beside one another, never truly wanting to part.

And yet the only answer were the notes scattered beside them.

‘Jumin Han’

‘Your husband’ 

‘Elizabeth 3rd’ 

‘RFA’ 

You gawked at them confusedly, feeling as if you should be connecting some sort of puzzle but utterly dumbfounded as to how exactly do so. 

You backed away slowly, gasping as you heard shifting from the bed, a light yawn escaping him.

“You’re up then…?” He murmured, glancing at you. 

You didn’t answer, staring at him.

“You saw the photos, didn’t you? You know who I am?” 

“I…I um…i-It says you’re my husband.” 

He picked up two wedding rings from the nightstand, slipping one on and setting the other in your palm, revealing the inscription.

‘My heart will always travel with you’

“We’ve been married for little over eight years now.” He muttered. “This has been going on for three years of that.” 

“What has?” 

“Your memory loss.” 

“W-Why?”

“There was an accident,” He replied. “It was our anniversary and I was taking you somewhere to surprise you, an eighteen wheeler ran a red light as we were turning and well…”

His voice drifted off, strained with the idea of having to bring it back up. 

“I managed to shield you from most of the physical damage when the truck rammed into the side that’s how my injuries came to be.” 

He lifted his right pant leg, revealing a prosthetic, slick and crisp metal modeling that of his other limb.

“It crushed my leg…” He confessed softly. “Aside from dying of blood loss, amputation was the only decision that was available…but it wasn’t even enough.” 

“For what?”

“To save you.” 

He reached out, wrapping his fingers on the side of your head, cringing for just a moment, as though remembering the blood and torn flesh that once peeled from it. 

“Our car was slammed into others, and your head crashed through the glass…” He whispered, tears seemingly threatening to spill.”You were dead for almost thirty seconds at the hospital love…I thought you were gone…” 

How many times had he been forced to retell this horrid tale to you?

How many times did he nearly cry?

How many times did he cry?

It hurt to think of that.

“Your brain can’t handle the trauma they told me…they said each day you’d revert to before it all…before you met me…the RFA…before you almost lost your life because of some silly surprise I had planned. A form of coping is what they call it.” 

“You couldn’t have predicted that…i-it’s not your fault.” 

He laughed weakly, ignoring the single tear that broke out.  

“Still the same beautiful heart…” He hummed, smiling weakly. “What made me so lucky to have you I’ll never know.” 

“How did we meet…?” 

“I suppose I should tell you something happy after all this shouldn’t I?” 

He stepped into the bathroom, beginning to change.

“It was accidental, to be honest. You were lead by a strange, anonymous number to the RFA chat room, and you took over planning for the Foundation’s party,” He answered. “As you were planning my father entered a catastrophe with his scandals, and I was dragged into it. When it started to take a toll on me I found comfort in you. You understood me, better than anyone ever had. I felt human with you, I still do.”

He came out, a polyester suit messily set up upon him, trying to compose himself as best as he could. 

“You untangled the knots in my head, and the moment I met you I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you,” He simpered. “All of my lives, if that sort of thing is true.” 

“Even now?” 

He nodded, certain.

“Even now.” 

“Do I ever…do I ever remember anything?” 

“You see a therapist that was recommended by our friend, V. He’ll call you in a bit when I’m gone for work and take you there.” 

“Why don’t you take me?”

“I-I…I don’t drive anywhere anymore…I-I can’t be in cars anymore.” He trembled for a moment, snapping himself out of it as he tugged his collar. “I walk now. Typically V will too, but he simply enjoys the sun. You can ask for Driver Kim if you’d prefer.” 

“No um..that’s fine.” 

“I work at the C & R building, my father is the CEO, I’m sure regardless you at least remember the company?”

You nodded weakly, figments of the immense building in your thoughts.

“Yeah you guys are…wow really popular…” You sighed. “My mom loves-” 

You paused, racing out into the hall, staring out at the grand penthouse before you. 

“Oh my god…” 

“You always did love the view,” He remarked, following after you. “Elizabeth 3rd should be around here somewhere if you’d like to say good morning to her as well.” 

“I saw her name on the notes.” 

“Yes she’s our cat, exceptionally stunning and amazing, only second to you,” He explained. “She did not like hearing that news.” 

You scoffed, amused. “Where is she?” 

“She likes to sleep in sun patches during the evenings but in the mornings she’ll be on the sofa usually. She used to sleep with us but the confusion in the mornings frightened her.” 

“Oh, I’m sorry!” 

“It’s not your fault, you can’t help it,” He assured you, setting a delicate palm on your shoulder. “we all understand that. We’re just grateful you’re here.” 

He led you to the couch, a television blank and reflecting, sets of tapes placed beneath it. 

“There are some videos we’ve recorded over the years that you sometimes play,” He pointed out. “I don’t know if it’d jog your memory in any way but if you’d like to go on.” 

“What’re they of?”

“One is our wedding, one is of our trips to…Greece I believe, and another is one of the RFA parties.” 

He checked his watch, huffing gently. “I need to leave, but I’ll be back tonight, I’ll call you when I’m able but don’t hesitate to if you need to, okay?”

“Okay.” 

He pressed a chaste kiss to your nose, waving goodbye before he left, the click of the knob being the last you heard of him.

And you were alone.

Until you heard a meow. 

You peered down the sofa, seeing the luscious white cat look up at you, droopy eyes and little yawn. 

You had enjoyed spending time with her, ensnared in the films that left you a mix of sorrow and butterflies erupting into your stomach as you held Elizabeth 3rd in your arms, only snatched away as your phone began to rapidly buzz in your pocket. 

And while you didn’t recognize the number, you recognized the name.

V.

You raised the phone timidly to your ear, waiting for him to speak first, unsure of what to say exactly.

“Hello? MC?”

“This is V…right?” 

“Yes that’s me, I’m outside waiting for you. Are you ready to see your therapist?” He asked, kindness painting his tone. “Jumin told you didn’t he?”

“Y-Yes.” 

“Do you want me to come up?”

“N-No, I’ll be down in a second!” 

“Don’t worry, take your time, I’ll be waiting.” 

He hung up promptly, soon seeing you rushing down confusedly down the stairs to meet him in the main hall.

“V-V?” You tapped his shoulder, shifting to you his gaze never quite meeting yours.

“MC?” 

“Oh thank goodness it’s you!” You let out a sigh of relief. “I’ve been wandering around asking so many people.” 

He chuckled. “You don’t change in the slightest do you?” 

“I…I guess not.” 

“It’s a good thing, you have a lovely personality.” 

You furrowed your brow confusedly.

“Why’re you wearing sunglasses? It’s cloudy.” 

He frowned for a second, suddenly realizing why you wouldn’t know.

“Oh, of course-I can’t see, I’m blind,” He grinned slightly. “I have been for awhile now, it’s gotten worse lately.” 

“How bad…?”

“When we originally met it was blurred but it was something I could live with but now, it’s blending in, the colors are fading, and it’s…it’s less distinctive.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“It’s not your fault,” He comforted. “Don’t worry about me, let’s take care of you.” 

“Well, shouldn’t we take care of you too?”

“You’ve tried. I don’t want it.” 

You didn’t know what to say. 

So you didn’t say anything. 

He hadn’t sounded upset, it was simply a matter of fact, the same compassion clear in his tone however dismissive. 

Eventually, though, he did speak up again as you came to the therapist’s office, standing outside. 

“I can go in with you, I don’t know whether or not you want the company.” 

“I’d like to try to do it on my own.” 

“Alright, I’ll wait for you out here, you mind if I get some coffee or something?” He questioned. “I can pick you up something too if you’d like, though, I’m sure Jumin will want to take you to lunch afterwards.” 

“Just some water would be fine.” 

“Of course.” 

And soon enough, you were in an office.

Your therapist had been an older woman, lines decorating her expression as blinking accompanied the eyes, her voice low and soothing.

She hadn’t said anything particularly surprising but she had shown you photos and videos of a time long since forgotten.

Videos of you excited and delighted surrounded by people you didn’t recognize. 

People such as Yoosung, 707, Zen, and Jahee. 

You were told they were your friends, also members of the RFA, having helped guide you along to bringing life to a party long since gone.

But you stared at them.

And felt nothing. 

That could’ve easily been the word to describe your day.

Nothing. 

You would forget it all in the end.

So did it even matter?

The only time you felt something was with Jumin.

Even at his mention you felt your heart bubble and threaten to burst, your stomach twisting into knots, a fuzzy delight inside of you.

First, it had been a call. 

He had checked up on you, softening the moment he heard you, even despite the hints of sadness as you mentioned your confusion, only a reminder to a pain you couldn’t truly understand. 

The second time had been lunch.

He had come with photos and video messages from Jahee and Mr. Han hoping you were safe and well, stories filling your head the whole time of the experiences you had with them.

And the whole time he held your hand. 

He enveloped his own with yours, holding on as if you were a dream he never wanted to wake from, almost heavy to let go as you were forced to leave.

But you did come back together.

When his work had finished and evening dotted the sky with oranges and pink amongst the clouds he came home.

And you had been waiting.

You had come to the wedding video.

And you were crying.

You hadn’t really even realized you were, only figuring as Jumin rushed to your side, worried and baffled.

“L-Love what’s the matter? What’s…” 

He couldn’t finish, glancing up at the screen to see the two of you exchanging vows, you yourself hardly able to finish before erupting into a nervous sort of laughter, hiding your face in the crook of his neck.

“I…I ruined everything.” You mumbled. “Didn’t I?”

“What?”

“I took all of this happiness from us.”

“You didn’t take anything from us, you couldn’t have helped what happened.” 

“Why do you even still love me?” You pointed at the version of you in the tape. “I’m not them…I’m not.” 

“Yes, you are.” 

“Then why am I waking up every day to a stranger?” You cried, swallowing hard. “Why am I unaware of the person beside me every morning? I don’t know you when the next day comes Jumin! I can’t be who you married!” 

“MC, look at me, please.” 

You did, reluctantly. 

He took your hands, running a gentle thumb over your knuckles.

And you felt the same feeling from him as you did at lunch.

A total and absolute desire to never let go.

“The first night, when you came home…after the…the accident…” He let out a shaky breath. “You saw me, and you started screaming. You jumped from the bed and started trying to run away. You tried to keep me away at all costs because you didn’t know me.” 

“You…You hit me.” 

You didn’t dare utter a word.

But your heart shattered. 

“But now, you’re not scared anymore…you don’t run away. You listen to me, you talk to me, and you even-” He stifled a sob. “you even smile at me.” 

“I don’t expect everything to go back to how it was, but I know that things are changing, they’re getting better.” 

“Jumin-” 

“I understand you may never wake up one day and remember everything from yesterday, and I will have to tell you the same story each time, and hope for the littlest of things. But I also understand that you’re still you. No matter what, each and every time I see you I see the person I am desperately in love with.” 

“I don’t deserve that.” 

“You do darling, you deserve that and the whole world.” 

He stood up, helping you to your feet. 

“You don’t have to remember everything right away, but until you do, even if it’s a second a day, I’m going to be here, with you. And I’m going to help you through it.” 

He wiped the tears emerging from your gaze, hiding his own as he embraced you.

“P-Promise?” 

“I promise.” 

And perhaps finally, you weren’t so afraid of tomorrow.

For you know, he would still be there.

And he always would be.

For one day, you would wake up to him in the morning.

And you would remember how much he truly adored you.

[greekowl87]

Fic: Long Strech of Love Pt 1 & 2

A/N: I posted this on AO3 last year but never finished it. But I finally found the courage to finish this with the latest @xfficchallenges of ‘Fics You Would Never Write’ which should be posted around in the next few days. That involves some smut. I don’t write smut. I never could and probably never will except this once. Writers like @sunflowerseedsandscience @mldrgrl @leiascully @kateyes224 @baronessblixen  @alittlemissfit I pale in comparison to. I think my writing sucks. But hey, I figured, I should post the other parts for context sake. I promise to wrap this up soon. 

A/N Last part is here!

This was my originally attempt at writing season 7 fic, with ‘All Things.’ And I’ve edited it some with this repost.

Title: Long Stretch of Love

Summary: I was listening to Lady Antebellum's “Long Stretch of Love” while driving home from work one night ] and I thought of the opening scene when Scully was leaving Mulder's apartment at the beginning of “All Things.” My take on the infamous scene and my first attempt at writing fic for season seven. And I guess my first attempt at writing smut. Maybe. We'll see.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of it. Chris Carter and company does.

She heard the rain as soon as she woke and then her brain hit her full force. What had she done? She sat  straight up in bed, somehow not waking Mulder who grunted slightly before flopping on his stomach. She watched him grunt again, pooling the sheets across his chest and waist, his leg sticking out at an odd angle. He grunted again, his arm seeking the warmth where her body had previously lay. His fingers grazed across her bare thigh and she held her breath, waiting for him to settle back to sleep. He grunted and relaxed when he sensed her presence. Carefully she removed his hand before gently placing her feet on the carpeted floor and getting up.

Her eyes roamed the floor, looking for something to cover herself, before spying an old bath towel which she wrapped around herself, before heading to the bathroom, picking up the loose articles of clothing that littered the floor.

She glanced over her shoulder at his sleeping form before entering the bathroom and shutting the door firmly behind her.

How did she get here? How did she let herself get here?

Scully's mind was racing at the impossibly high amount of things that could go wrong. Her hand automatically reached for the shower knob, ready to take a shower, but paused, wondering if it would wake Mulder, which is the last thing she wanted. She withdrew her hand, and pinched the bridge of her nose, wondering what she should do.

As she let her thoughts, her hands automatically fixed her hair and dressed herself. She stared at her reflection in the mirror, leaning forward, trying to discern any new wrinkles, her mind aimlessly wandering. She was different. She was different than before. They both were. What had changed?

She straightened her green sweater and paused in the doorframe of his bathroom, turning off the light quickly, not risking waking him still. She placed both of her hands on the door frame, rocking herself back and forth, trying to will the anxiety she felt away. Scully had not done this since she was a child, since she was in medical school awaiting the results of a major test, or the anxiety that inevitably came with her affair with Daniel. But Mulder was different. Last night proved he was different. So why was this moment causing her so much anxiety?

Scully focused on Mulder's face. He frowned slightly in his sleep, his right hand stretching outwards and then curling back into a fist when he sensed her absence. Scully held her breath. He flexed his hand repeatedly, moving slightly over the spot to where she had been sleeping. He groaned in his sleep, frowning, and buried his face into his pillow.

This was nothing new either.

Since she found him with his brain sliced open in the bowels of the Department of Defense, they had undoubtedly grown close. Finding herself in bed with him was not an uncommon occurrence, except, she would usually be gone before the morning sun, and she would talk nothing about it at the office, and Mulder respected that, especially when he tried the first time and Scully shut him out. So now, it just sort of happened, just like an extension of their years of unspoken communication.

Just like it happened last night, but more came of it. Much more.

Scully watched Mulder, trying to will the new uneasiness she felt to the pits of her stomach before she quickly made her way across the room to pick up her jacket and sneaked quietly out the living room to get her boots. She cast a lingering glance at the worn, leather couch and the haphazardly tossed wool blanket on the floor.

“What if there was only one choice and all the other ones were wrong? And there were signs along the way to pay attention to.”

“Mmm. And all the... choices would then lead to this very moment. One wrong turn, and... we wouldn't be sitting here together. Well, that says a lot. That says a lot, a lot, a lot. That's probably more than we should be getting into at this late hour.”

She remembered falling asleep against his shoulder, and he had dozed off as well. Then she woke up, momentarily not recalling where she was to find she had woken Mulder up as well. Then one thing led to another...

The way he touched her always set her ablaze. His kisses—she closed her eyes recalling the moment—they felt different, everything felt different. His hands roamed like they normally would, but he touched her more reverently and lovingly. She remembered her tongue exploring her, tasting her like it was the first time. For the first real time. Everything had been so painfully slow...

She caught her breath, not allowing herself to be caught up in any more memories. Her mind was moving a thousand times an hour as she hurriedly pulled on her boots and made her way to the door. She looked at her watch as she pulled the brown apartment door behind her slightly, double checking to make sure it was locked as she made her way to the elevator at the end of the hall. She looked over her shoulder, uneasiness welling up inside of her. She had made the walk of shame home countless times. Why did now feel so different? It hurt her. With each step, she took away from that apartment, from him, felt like she was growing lost in a sea of confusion, and he was the only one that could center everything.

She closed her eyes, hitting the down arrow button repeatedly, growing impatient at how unusually slow the old elevator seemed. She looked at her watch. 4:51 A.M. The 21st. Saturday. She would not have to go to the office. She would not have to deal with him. Or this or these feelings, whatever it was. She could just go home back to Georgetown, lock her apartment door, hide away for the weekend, and not have to face anything until she went back to the office on Monday morning. Finally, the elevator doors opened, she rushed in, and she hit the button repeatedly to close the doors.

….

It was still raining when Mulder came to consciousness. He ran his hand down the length of the right side of the bed, surprised to find Scully gone. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and glanced about his room, finding no evidence of her anywhere. “Shit,” he groaned, falling back into bed and placing his arm over his eyes.

Mulder really thought he had something this time. That the secret nights in one of their beds without speaking a word of it the next morning had come to an end. Scully's moment of epiphany about her life was enough of a catalyst to propel them forward. He loved her. Dear God did he love her so much it hurt. He had loved her for years and would do anything for her. Granted their relationship had it's ups and downs; she shot him in the shoulder, but to be fair, he was deranged out of his mind. But she was always there for him, and in her moments of weakness, likewise. Wasn't that what love was? Or at least a part of it?

He sighed and reached for his cell phone that rested on his nightstand. He dialed his voicemail. Nothing. Grunting, he glanced at his red alarm clock. 7:34. A.M. Saturday. If she had not called now, she wouldn't be any time soon. And adding the fact it was Saturday, he would not see her until the office Monday, it weighed him down all the more.

Groaning, he threw his feet over the side of the bed, reaching for some discarded basketball shorts. He ventured out into his living room, unsurprised to see her not there, and again with no clue that she had even been there. Mulder sat down on his leather couch, picking up the wool blanket off the floor, pausing briefly to smell it (it still smelt of her), and then gazed at the small Buddha statue that sat under his fish tank. Everything happened for a reason, he sighed with determination, and he was going to make sure of it.

With renewed determination, he headed to the shower, grabbing his jeans and a light sweater. He had a goal and that goal resided in Georgetown.

.......

Part II: The Stretch

Disclaimer: everything still applies. I own nothing, Chris Carter and Co own the characters and the universe, I am just borrowing. The same applies to the opening quote, which belongs to the band Lady Antebellum and Capital Records Nashville.

“Oh, baby I don't ever wanna break this chain I don't ever wanna walk away Oh, long stretch of love.” - Lady Antebellum “Long Stretch of Love”

Scully toweled her hair as she emerged from her shower and pulled on a fluffy robe before going to the window and frowned. It was still raining. She did not remember the weather forecasts calling for rain all weekend but she supposed it suited her mood. Combing her wet hair back, she ventured into the kitchen where she turned the tv on in the living room the Saturday morning news and went to her cabinets to draw down her tea kettle.

Tea. Mulder. Fuck.

She leaned against the counter, wondering how the smallest things were creating memories of him. They left the hospital together and went back to his apartment. She made tea for him with his newly acquired kettle which she had bought for him the night before. But that would not stop her from enjoying her tea. She filled the kettle with water and set it on the stove, and pulled down a box of green tea beside it. She relaxed slightly, rolling her neck, as she ventured back out to the living room and pulled her knees to her chest. She picked up her tv remote and turned up the volume on the news as the weather report finally came on.

“Good morning, metro area,” the meteorologist greeted, “as you can see this weekend is the perfect one to take it easy and stay indoors. With last night's surprise showers, expect them to continue onward all week into early Monday morning. If you are planning to go anywhere, make sure you bring that umbrella. Expect temperatures to stay in the mid to upper 40s while this front lingering. So much sure you stay warm too.”

Well, Scully thought, at the universe was encouraging her to hide away in her apartment this weekend. Her thoughts were interrupted with the kettle whistling and she got up and trudged back into the kitchen and poured herself a cup of tea. As she fixed herself a cup, she let her mind drift again.

She really disliked the fact she was doing all this thinking and introspection. But ever since that moment in the Buddhist in the temple, all the thoughts and the emotions she had managed to pin away for the past seven years had suddenly come out like a breaking dam, and she hated it. She raised and lowered the tea bag in her mug, frowning even more as she thought how everything was finally coming to a head.

Last night was different from every thing else. Last night had been...

Then there was a quick rapping on her door and she froze, her heart sinking, knowing who damn well who it was. And there was no point in trying to hide the fact she was not hearing him. Scully had been lucky and parked her car close to her apartment's entrance, but he would have seen it. And heard her tv that was on. She rushed to her bedroom, shutting the door behind her slightly, calling, “It's open!”

She had not unlocked it. And if it was really him, he would use his key. He always did lately, whether she was home or not. Ever since those secret nights started, with the exception of the office and professionalism, he threw complete disregard to her personal boundaries. It started early in their relationship with his random phone calls at three a.m. in the morning about whatever topic had gotten him excited during his insomniac nights. And now, this...

“Scully?” he called, poking his head in the door. Mulder saw her tv was on and smelled tea brewing. He knew she was home. He entered in cautiously and shut the door behind him. He took off his leather jacket and set his umbrella by the door. “Scully?”

She inwardly cursed herself and leaned against the door. “Um,” she cleared her throat, raising her voice, “just give me a moment, Mulder. I just got out of the shower.”

Mulder closed his eyes and bit his fist at the mere notion Scully was standing naked behind that door. The previous night was fresh on his mind and he wanted to do nothing more than show Dana Scully how much he loved and worshiped her. But no. He had to stay on task. He came here for a reason. Shit. This was going to be hard.

“Do you want me to make you breakfast or something?” he called, venturing into her kitchen. He could smell the green tea. “I can make some mean toast.”

Scully inwardly groaned again, rushing about her bedroom to change into a dirty pair of jeans and an extra large, worn sweatshirt. In her haste, she completely forgot to put on a bar. She was already opening the bedroom door and going back into the kitchen before she realized it. Fuck, she thought, fuck, fuck, fuck. But despite her inward panic, she forced a smile. “Would you like some tea?” she offered.

“Oh, no,” he awkwardly smiled back. “I'm all teaed out.”

“Is that even a word?”

He shrugged and went back to looking through her cabinets. “You left in such a hurry this morning,” he ventured casually.

Of course. Cut right to the chase.

“I had to...” she searched for a convincing lie. “I had to make sure my circuit breakers had not tripped.”

“Circuit breakers, Scully?” he asked, now moving toward the fridge. God, that was a pathetic excuse and he knew it.

“Yeah,” she said, crossing her arms, “they've been doing patience and my landlords have been asking all of the residents to check them. Daily. Twice. Daily.”

“Uh huh,” he said, looking over his shoulder. She looked so flustered. And well, beautiful. “Why don't you go and sit down. I'll make you breakfast.”

“You can't cook,” she deadpanned.

“I can cook one or two things. Eggs is one of them.” She grumbled something under her breath and began to go back to her living room. “Don't forget your tea!”

She stopped mid stride and grabbed her tea before retreating back into the living room. Well, he thought, smiling slightly and rummaging for the eggs and whatever else look appealing, including the bacon buried in the very back of the fridge, this was certainly off to a good start. He could tell she was uncomfortable and this was going exactly how it he wanted it to.

Fuck. Fuckity fuck fuck fuckery.

Scully's mind was racing. He had never done this before. He had never come over after one of their nights together and made breakfast for her. Ever. Not that she would let him. He probably would if she did. Apparently, he did not care this morning, no matter how uncomfortable it made her. She brought her knees to her chest, unused to whatever this new thing was. It scared her.  She rested her chin on the top of her knees and focused on the tv, doing her best to tune him out.

In the kitchen, he at least had enough culinary skill to whip up scrambled eggs, toast, and bacon. He gazed at her in the living room. Her wet red hair a shade darker than usual was slicked back. She shifted uncomfortably as if sensing he was watching her and drew the hood up to hide her face. “Hey, what do you say to mimosas for breakfast?” he called.

“I don't have champagne,” she replied quickly.

“Screwdrivers?” he suggested, eyeing a bottle of vodka on top of the fridge. He remembered seeing orange juice in there too. “Come on. It's the weekend, Scully. We're not going anywhere.”

“Quit trying to get me drunk at 9 a.m, Mulder,” she groaned, pulling back her hood. Screwdrivers? Really? What was he trying to imply? She turned to face him from the couch and gasped slightly in surprise to see him balancing two plates and two glasses of orange juice skillfully out into the living room. “You didn't set my apartment on fire.”

“Well, like I said, I can cook a little,” he replied, setting the plates and juice down with ease. “I did spend one summer as a waiter on the Vineyard though so I am better at serving than cooking. I hope you're hungry and no, it's just regular orange juice.”

Scully was speechless. She could not remember any man she had dated do this for her. Mulder always surprised her when she least suspected it with the little things. Like breakfast. After she left him. Again. She felt that uncertainty well up in her again, the same she felt from last night, the same she felt before she left from that morning. “Thank you,” she managed.

She picked the warm plate up from the coffee table and set it in her lap. She pushed the eggs tentatively with her fork before taking a small bite. He smiled when her blue eyes rose to meet his hazel eyes. “See, you didn't die,” he teased.

She smiled, a real smile, and he saw her relax a fraction. She ate in silence with him, making a few happy noises as she ate the rest of her breakfast. He could not help but watch her and smiled. He had always wanted to do this with her ever so those nights started, something as simple as making her breakfast. He did not know why she would run from him. At first, he thought it was merely them relieving seven years of sexual tension the first time it happened. Then it happened again. And again. And again. The more it happened, the more he questioned the ulterior reason why for it. Last night had been the breakthrough he had been waiting for and like hell he was going to throw this chance away.

“Thank you,” she finally replied. “Let me clean up. It's the least I can do.” To get away from this situation. This entire thing. “After all, you're the guest.”

“Scully,” he began, holding a hand mockingly over his heart. “You wound me.”

“I'm fine, Mulder,” she called from the kitchen.

He threw his head back in despair. Jesus, she was good. And annoying. She was avoiding the subject entirely. And pushing all his buttons just right. “Scully, breakfast was not the only reason why I came over here,” he called, getting up.

“I'm busy today,” she replied quickly. “My...mother is coming over...”

“To check your circuit breakers at five a.m. that your landlord is enforcing?” he finished, leaning against the counter.

Oh, God, she screamed inwardly. She physically tensed. She could smell his aftershave...last night... “I can't right now, Mulder,” she murmured, focusing her blue eyes on the dishes in her hands.

“What changed from last night,” he asked softly, brushing a stray lock of hair from her face. “Last night we were babbling on about fate and destiny and now you're running from me, from us.”

She closed her eyes reverently as his fingers grazed her temple. She took a deep breath to steady herself. She leaned  forward, bracing herself against the sink. “Nothing's...changed....” she managed.

“Scully.”

“Mulder, I can't talk about this right now,” she whispered.

“When can we talk about it then,” he asked pointedly. He pinched his brow tiredly.  “I am getting tired of this, Scully. How long has this been going on between us?”

“This,” she emphasized, “is what I can't talk about right now. It's too soon.”

“When will it be soon enough,” he asked. “You know--” he paused. “You know how I feel. I'll keep waiting forever if I have to but don't do this to me anymore, Scully.”

She looked up, her blue eyes were watery, as tears threatened to spill. Mulder sighed, realizing this was an inward battle between herself. It had nothing to do with him. He cupped her face and kissed her forehead lovingly, pouring all his love for her into that single kiss. “I'm sorry,” she hiccupped. “I just need some more time.”

“Tonight,” he said softly, lowering his eyes. “I'll be by tonight with dinner. We are going to have this conversation whether you like it or not and we need to decide where we go from here. I'll wait forever for you, Scully, but I don't know how much longer I can endure.”

“Mulder,” she sighed, wiping her eyes.

“Tonight, Scully,” he replied, grabbing his jacket and umbrella. “I'm not taking no for an answer.”

She watched him leave and felt the tears trickle down her cheeks. Yesterday had been so perfect. Last night had been heaven on Earth. This morning limbo. Today, purgatory. She wiped her remaining tears and went back to the couch, drawing the blanket back up around her knees. She turned the tv up and laid down on the couch. She closed her eyes, her mind, heart and will in an ever constant battle, slowly awaiting for Mulder's return as the rain continued outside.

[rhodirachel]

Ribbons | 13 | An Undertale Fanfiction

Chapters

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |

Summary

                                                                                                                Formerly known as “New Years Present”

Frisk deals with battles time and time again- her PTSD from the Underground, the constant hate between Humans and Monsters, and more. What will happen if she sinks too deep in something she cannot grasp?

Part of my/an original Undertale AU, REMTale.

Rating: M

Words: 1,850

Relationships: Papyton, Frans, Alphyne

Warnings: Possession, PTSD, Schizophrenia, Borderline Personality Disorder

I wake up in a jolt with tears forming in my eyes. Throwing the sheets to the side of the bed, the air feels sticky from sweat. I try to think about it, what just happened, but I can’t bring myself to. My breathing is ragged, and it feels as if someone is gripping on my lungs. I sit up and I try to calm down, but it seems to be of no use. Nothing of that dream is something I can comprehend. So many questions ring, like a tsunami of confusion.

And yet, it’s just another day, isn’t it?

Hunched over, I sit on the side of my bed. Silence recedes from the room as I shut my eyes and begin to laugh. Hysteria consumes me as I throw my head back, tears flinging from my eyes- a desperate cackle escapes my lips. I continue to cry, but this laughter pursues. I wrap my arms around my knees and bring them close, my laughter abruptly turning into choked cries.

There’s a soft knock that sounds at my door. My face shoots up from my knees, and my heart skips a beat out of fear. I quickly wipe my eyes and my feet pad over to the door. Slowly grabbing and turning the knob, I crack the door open slightly.

“Yes?” I whisper.

“Hey, punk. You okay?”

I look through the crack, noticing Undyne’s dejected face. I stare anywhere else but at Undyne as I sigh and shake my head. I open the door up more, letting Undyne into the room I’m staying in.

“I could hear you from the bedroom. It was a bit muffled, but I could tell what was going on pretty easily,” she frowned.

I sit down on the bedside, checking over at the clock on the nightstand. It read 5:15 AM. Silence looms over the room like a thick film.

“Undyne, if I told you something, would you trust me?”

Undyne chuckles and sits down next to me. “You bet your ass I would. What’s on your mind?”

I lower my head, looking at the ground as silence passes. Can I even formulate the words to be able to say this to her? Can I even tell her?

First it’s a croak, and then a whisper that flows from my lips. “I don’t know what’s going on with me anymore.”

Undyne sighs, her face turning even grimmer.

“I know you’re going through a lot, and sometimes you can feel like that-”

“No, Undyne, I really do mean it. I just… I just don’t feel the same anymore. I don’t feel like me. There’s something inside of me, something that I just can’t shake off. And it lingers. Undyne, there’s something. Something that just doesn’t seem right. There’s something always there, as if standing right next to me. It’s next to me, it’s in my head. It’s in my dreams.”

“...Is that why you’re up this early?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I mean… What happened?”

“It spoke to me.”

“...It spoke to you?”

“Yeah. I’d rather not say what it said, though. Not right now.”

“Alright. I just want you to know, though. Whenever you need to talk to someone… Frisk-”

She takes hold on my chin lightly, shifting my gaze from the floor to her. She lets go of my chin, and she gives me a reassuring smile. “Whenever you need to talk to someone, or you just need someone there for you… I want you to know I’m going to be here for you. I trust you to the end. We’re going to figure out what all of this is.”

For the first time in a while, it’s easy to crack a smile. She pats my leg and walks over to the door.

“Another thing, Frisk?”

“Yeah?”

“...You knew what was happening when the boy got hurt, didn’t you?”

“...Yes.”

“But… But it wasn’t you, was it? ...It was that... thing.”

“...Yes.”

Undyne nods, turning her face in my direction.

“We’re going to take care of it. So don’t worry, okay? We’ll fix you right up, punk.” I smile towards her and nod. With that, she closes the door. The silence washes over once more.

-----------------------------------

I didn’t end up coming out of the room that morning. Just being in the same room as Alphys and Sans was unsettling enough for me to stay in my room. Later though, around 11 or so, Undyne came upstairs and talked me into coming downstairs with her to eat breakfast. As I walked downstairs, all I could do was stare at the floorboards beneath me. I didn’t want to see them looking at me. I didn’t want to see them right now. Every time I see them, my heart simply sinks in my chest. I stayed quiet throughout the entire meal as everyone else conversed at the table. Every now and then I would notice one of them staring at me, but as I would lift my eyes up from the table they would look away. One pair of eyes did lock with me during the breakfast, though. Sans’ eyes. We stayed there for a moment, looking at each other. He looked... dull. There was no other way to put it. The way his eyes had dimmed down; the way he didn’t really seem to smile that much anymore. All he gives me is a dead expression as I look away from him.

“Frisk!”

I snap my head over to the sound, and I see it’s Undyne who’s calling for me.

“Alphys was trying to say something to you.”

I look over towards Alphys, and she gives an annoyed sigh.

“What I was saying was: you need to come with me this morning. I need to s-start tests on your SOUL. You know, the reason you’re here.”

My heart sinks at the way she speaks to me, and even Undyne gives her a look. Alphys notices and she frowns, looking away from both of us. She gets up from her chair and starts grabbing her bags.

“Get ready. We’re leaving soon.”

I get up from the table without saying a word, pushing in my chair. The stairs beneath me creak as I make my way up to get ready for the day. It doesn’t take long at all for me to take a shower, I practically jumped in and jumped out. I tried balancing myself between drying my hair with a towel, brushing my teeth and getting clothes on all at the same time. Each and every move I made, though, my chest felt heavier. Like I was carrying some dead weight that I couldn’t seem to get rid of. No matter how much I tried to do something, or how fast, it didn’t really seem to matter. My body felt like it was slowly withering from the inside. Dead-tired, I stagger down the stairs, wishing that I was truly ready for the day.

-----------------------------------------

Alphys and I got into her car near the house and set off for the hospital. The entire time we drove it was silent, and I felt like I was going to hurl from all the anxiety. It made me extremely uncomfortable, knowing that Alphys was going to be experimenting on me. I had no idea what tests she was even going to do. I tried my best to calm down, looking out the window and taking deep breaths to stop myself from feeling so sick. The scenery was even gloomy. It was a sad, rainy day. It’s still only the beginning of February, kind of, and everything still seemed so dead. I’m surprised the rain isn’t snow, actually.

We arrived at the hospital fairly quickly. The entire building seemed to be hung in my aura of melancholy. I silently got out of the car as Alphys was leaving for the building. I tried hurrying up to her, but it didn’t seem to matter as we were stopped by the front desk.

“Hello, Dr. Alphys. It’s good to see you again,” chirps the receptionist.

“Hello, I’m clocking in today and requesting an operating theatre. Afterwards I will be clocking back o-out. Okay?”

“Not a problem. Here are the papers for the report.”

Alphys made me wait in the reception hall as she filled out all of the papers. It took a while, and the room started to get stuffy. I was getting more and more anxious about the operation. What was going to happen during it? What was she even really trying to study? I know she said that she wanted to see how my SOUL was doing, and she wanted to see how she could help it, but at this point I’m not so sure if she would want to do that for me. And, I know Alphys has gotten better… but, what about her past patients from the Underground? Their determination? I don’t think she has worked with it since…

“Frisk, come on, the table’s ready.”

I notice Alphys handing papers back to the receptionist, and she turns around to see if I’ve been listening to her. I nod, get up from my seat, and follow her down a series of hallways till we get to the room.

The place seemed… too clean. Too… nothing. Then again, I never really did like hospitals. Like the one time I broke my arm and Toriel started crying to the doctor when we reached the hospital. I hated seeing her cry. I hated how calm the doctor was; he was albeit calm as apathetic. I hated how “pristine” the curtains were, or the walls. It seemed too anything. Too fake, to me.

“Okay, just lay on the table and I can get started on looking at this thing. I’m going to need to prod a bit, but it’s not like I can give you any medicine for this. We need to see your weak spots.”

My face and hands grow cold as she finishes. “Weak spots?”

I lay on the table and she starts filling out papers, I’m assuming to record the process. “Yes, weak spots. The process of mending a SOUL is more than mere ‘mending’, you know.”

She finishes her papers for the moment, and stands up from her chair. My SOUL is pulled from my chest and she begins examining it. Trying to calm myself down, I decide to prod more at the information. “Well, what is it like then?”

Alphys spends her time closely looking at the chipping of my SOUL, and starts lightly touching it to turn it ways where she can see the wounds clearer. “Well the SOUL, a-although it chips, is mended as if by stitching. Almost. The foreign piece s-stays there, almost barely attached to the SOUL. Now what makes this different from stitching, and why we call it mending, is because even though the piece is barely attached at first and, a-as if pressed to the original SOUL, it mends very quickly to the SOUL. It’s simply unlike any stitching there is, and it practically melts into the original SOUL. When stitching might take months, the mending might take mere seconds to minutes. It’s quite r-remarkable…”

“Ow! What is that?” I worried.

“Don’t worry. I’m just touching ends of your SOUL. I think I’ve found where the weakest parts a-are, and I think I might know now where we’ll need to mend. That is, if we can find someone who will give part of their SOUL as a donor. So far we’ve s-till been out of luck.”

“Where do you guys mend it?”

“We usually mend it where the weak s-spots are. It’s where the SOUL needs the most attention, s-so. Then it spreads out through the rest of the SOUL, and then-”

Alphys’ phone went off, and she stopped prodding to check it. She answered her phone, the speaker immediately raring with volume.

“Papyrus, wha- what’s wrong?” cried Alphys.

I could hear more yelling on the phone, and Alphys started tearing up. I let my SOUL slowly sink back in my chest, the pain from earlier making my body sore. I got off of the table and made my way towards Alphys.

“Alphys, what’s wrong? What’s going on?” Alphys looks at me with pure terror. Tears start to leak down her golden scales as she turns her head away from me slightly.

“I’m leaving right now, Papyrus. We’ll be down there. I promise.”

Alphys grabs her keys and phone, leaving behind all the rest of her papers. She grabs my hand and tugs me along.

“Alphys, you gotta tell me what’s going on. What was wrong with Papyrus?” I shudder. I feel like I’m going to have another panic attack any second now.

“We need to leave. Now.”

-----------------------------------------------------

I jump into the car along with Alphys, and she drives as fast as ever down the roads of the city. I try and close my eyes to calm down, the mere pace of her driving begins to set me on edge. What was Papyrus freaking out so much about? It couldn’t have been with Mettaton, it couldn’t have been…

I open my eyes, and we’ve already gone miles and miles away from the hospital. The road we’re on, it’s familiar…

“Alphys, why are we on this road-”

“Frisk, just be quiet! I C-CANNOT DEAL WITH YOU RIGHT-”

Alphys stops her sentence short, breaking into tears as she presses the pedal down further. We make it to Toriel’s school building, a building I’ve seen since some of my youngest years… Burning to pieces.

I can’t help but shriek at the site, and Alphys immediately stops the car for us to get out. I throw up my door and rush onto the site, the waft of warmth rushing over me from the flames. I’m crying and my heart is racing and I can’t stop screaming and I can’t-

“Frisk! Frisk get over here! Don’t go into the school!”

I glance over for a mere moment, seeing the group all there. Sans, Papyrus, Undyne, Mettaton, Asgore, and Alphys running towards them. All but Toriel. I ignore their calls and pleas, and I rush forward even faster towards the school. Tears stream from my eyes as I call for my mom. All I can hear is the cracking of wood and breaking of glass as I run down the long garden. I’m almost there when I feel something grab my arm, yanking me back.

“Frisk, you can’t go into the building! It’s all gonna go!”

I look into Sans’ eyes, but I can’t feel anything. I can’t move anymore, I can only see from a looking glass…

No, no no no! Not this again! Please!

I’m shrieking from the inside, but nothing escapes my mouth. The only thing that leaves my body are my tears, coursing my face.

“I-I’m…”

I try to stop myself from speaking, I’m begging it to stop…

“Not.”

No, please, I am…I AM!

“Frisk.”

My arms move instinctively, practically grabbing Sans and throwing him onto the concrete slabs of the school. I’m losing my vision, I can barely keep up with my own body, but I need to keep going. I need to see my mom…

The thing that haunts me lurks away, and I fall to the ground crying. I pull myself together quickly, and throw myself into the doors of the school. Smoke pounds around me, and I use part of my shirt to guard my nose and mouth to breathe somewhat. I’m looking for any indication where she could be, running down hallways to find Toriel. Monsters… Children’s bodies pile amongst the classrooms and libraries, hallways and offices. Toriel… My mother… Where is she? Dammit, where is-

I walk into one of the classrooms, noticing the fur immediately. This classroom was no exception to burnt bodies, the smell of melting flesh, fur and scales overpowering. A dozen arms don her waist, as if her embrace was their very protection from the flames. I stagger to her, my tears blinding my way. I drag Toriel into the hallway, her body entirely motionless.

I hold her in my arms, my shrieking beginning again. I rock her back and forth, petting her fur as my tears coat it. This can’t be the end, this can’t be… “Mommy… please don’t g-go… Please don’t leave me…”

Her eyes are wide open, but there is no dilation. There is no motion. There is no breathing.

I clutch her more, my breathing staggering from my tears and the smoke.

“Mommy please, I miss you so m-m-uch… so, so much a-a… already, dammit! Please!” I scream my lungs out. Black begins to cloud my vision. My clutch on my mother begins to loosen. I can’t breathe.

“Maybe it won’t be so bad, to leave with you…”

I lay my head on Toriel’s chest, feeling the smoke begin to overtake my lungs. I speak anyway.

“You remember the time… when we were at the flower shop mom? You remember that? I visited it the other day… It was so beautiful. Just like you… You were always so beautiful to me, mom... I just… I asked you to listen to me mom,” I jerk, tears swelling again, “I asked you to listen, I knew those men were bad, I wish you would have listened…”

I can hear things from inside, but they sound so far away… My vision darkens more and more, my lungs hurt so much…

“Oh no, punk. You’re not leaving us. I made you a promise, remember!?”

I feel a hard slap to the face and I jolt up, Undyne carrying me out the building. She tries to give me a smile, but I see her sad eyes. I see the tears streaming down her cheeks and gills.

“Well, don’t you?”

I nod. “Yes, I do.”

“That’s right. I said we’d fix you up.”

Undyne rushes out of the building, making it to the back gardens. I cough harshly in the air, my lungs plagued by black smoke. Undyne makes her way around the building, her body racking in coughs as well. Once we make it around to the front, Undyne and I are met by an ambulance that takes us inside. They sit us down and give us something called a bronchodilator, something they said would help with the passaging of air through our lungs. We sit there for a while, coughing, wishing it would go away.

Alphys rushes up to Undyne, tears down her face. She hits Undyne’s arm when she gets to the ambulance, screeching. “Why did you go inside? Why!”

Undyne gives her a questioning look, and retaliates. “Why? Because Frisk was in there! What did you think I was supposed to do? Just leave her there?”

“That’s not your problem!” Alphys turns to me, pointing at me, “It was your decision to go in there. Just because you two are apparently all best buddy-buddy now does not mean that gives you the right to just expect my wife to come for your safety whenever you think there’s some crisis going on with you!”

“That is enough!” barks Undyne. She gets up from her seat, hacking up and spitting before addressing Alphys. “I don’t know what is your problem with Frisk, but she is our friend. And you have no right to demean what’s going on with Frisk-”

“Oh please, not you! You actually buy that?” Alphys narrows her eyes, glaring at Undyne. “What’s next. Haunted houses? Napstablook is actually a demon spirit?”

Undyne’s face turns into one of rage, and she looks away with Alphys as she laughs.

“You know Alphys, I think you should leave right now. I think you should really think about what you just said. And I want you to leave.”

Alphys’ face turns cold, one of worry. She begins to try and say something, but turns around and walks away to the others. Undyne huffs and starts coughing more along with me.

“Are you feeling any better, Frisk?”

“Yeah. I’m… really sorry. About all of it. The school, you and Alphys…”

“Don’t apologise. I honestly don’t know what’s wrong with Alphys and Sans. They’ve been treating you like shit and I don’t like it. As for the school… I know why you went, Frisk. I would have went in too.”

I shift my face away from her, trying not to cry. Something in my heart breaks, almost like a little twig.

“My mom…”

Undyne wraps an arm around me, pulling me closer. I begin to cry on her shoulder, staring at the ground.

“I know it’d be bullshit to tell you it’s going to be okay. We’re going to do something about it though, Frisk. I promise.”

Copyright 2017 © rhodirachel. All rights reserved.