#not the ethel cain title tho

[sautewonder]

so guess what... i did it again and i am back with a fic but this time it is going to be multichaptered and HEAVY

we are so back

[adamshallperish]

ethel cain is like one of those old ladies who comes into the barnes and noble once a month to buy 75+ harlequin romances with her pension check

[julietasgf]

I would LOVE to hear your thoughts/inspirations for the religious themes/trauma in Pray For Your Salvation. That was one of my absolute favorite elements and made the fic feel so viscerally painful (in a good way), so I’d love to hear ur reasoning!

tysmmmm for the ask!! <33 alright, here we go:

the main source of the way I handled religion in that fanfic came not from the book carrie and not the movies, but I particularly loved how the musical of the story worked with it (the musical itself is not very good tho lskslsksl). I feel like each of the adaptations got a different way to work with it, you know? but the musical was so visceral and a lot of the lyrics of the songs and the way they related to actual biblical verses made me insaneeeeee

the title of the fic itself comes from one of the songs, but more specifically, I REALLY like the 1988 version of "the destruction", because there's this amazing line of "pray for your salvation from damnation, god has seen your sinning just beginning, pray or he will burn you" AND THE WAY THE ACTRESS WAS SINGING HE WILL BURN YOU ALL WHILE DOING THE DESTRUCTION..... the way the biblical violence and the actual violence going on intersect made me go crazy and was a big source of inspiration

I would also add that preacher's daughter by ethel cain was a huge inspiration too while writing the themes (the imagery in my head), and ofc tons of real life inspirations (not necessarily mine, but from stuff I have seen and heard about, specially regarding parents that after traumatic events go hard into religion to the point of psychosis; I would say also that towards the end, the story of abraham almost killing his son isaac was also a big point to me too. it was something I've already reflected before, about how scary it must be to a child having their own father almost sacrificing them because of a greater good or a greater voice).

still on imagery topic, I like working with images on my head, and I would say the posters of "god told me to" (1976) were also a big inspo to the vibes I wanted to bring into the fic!!

[sempersirens]

rules: spell your url with song titles and then tag as many people as there are letters

thank you sm for the tags @persephone-girl @mandoisapunk @ilovepedro i really appreciate u all still including me in tings even tho i haven't been active, my heart is sooooo big

bless the telephone - labi siffre

romeo and juliet - dire straits

englishman in new york - sting

a house is not a home - dionne warwick

knee socks - arctic monkeys

francis forever - mitski

a&w - lana del rey

sun bleached flies - ethel cain

tender - blur

-

across the universe - fiona apple

turbines/pigs - black country, new road

-

just crazy love - fleetwood mac

oblivion - grimes

everybody's talkin' - harry nilsson

lover, you should've come over - jeff buckley

smackwater jack - carole king

tagging: anyone who hasn't done it yet! just tag me in urs so i can be nosey xxx

[midnight1404]

1, 6, 7, 16, 19, 27, 28, 29!

Well, this was my first year dong fanfiction so following my word count (without counting three comms of 5k words that i didnt upload) i write 65, 993 words this year!!! yippy!!

6. To my surprise, that will be "As we fall (You will be part of me)" my poem collection that i have a little abandoned (but i will be back tho heheheh :3)

7. Well tbh, with a few exceptions, i almost never use song lyrics as titles so for now i don't an especial artist that i use the most (but i predict that one will be surely Breaking Benjamin or Ethel Cain surely)

16. Taking out the obvious ones like Dead dove, incest, etc. I'm proud that tag is "Catholic imagery" and "Daddy issues"

19. I can say jakelo? nah, just kidding...I think bessides my otp, im interested in explore more Quaritch's charcter in different angles and obviously i will do it along with Lo'ak (and maybe Taliya bc i just like imagine Q with someone he can't stand.)

27. I can't explain it very well, is a mess without a real order, is just a mix of Crystal Castles, Breaking Benjamin (or rock in general), Mitski, etc.

28. The Offspring and My Sab's gift one-shot (that is coming)

29.I have two coming from my two first works ever, and i cant chose just one so here it is:

The first one comes from the fourth chapter of A Father's child (my first fanfic, pls dont read it, is bad compared to my other works.), and i hold it close to my heart bc summarizes one of the main reasons why im so fixated in Lo'ak and Jake's relathionship, how difficult and fuck up it is, where there is intense amount of love but also a lot of past, guilt, and ghosts:

“I know that I’m a failure to you…” Lo’ak says with a broken voice, a single tear falls from his eye. “But is a lot of begging to look at me? Not as Toruk makto’s soldier or the kid that you were once time ago but as your son, Father….” More tears fall through his face, his voice cracking. “I’m your son, an imperfect one.”

 Jake thinks that statement it’s a cruel joke. Every time that he sees Lo’ak since his birth, the first sentence that come always to Jake’s mind is My child. The single one from his children of blood that came to this world with five fingers and eyebrows, the one who is stubborn and capable of jump to the danger without think twice, just like Jake.

"Neteyam is his pride, Kiri his empathy and Tuk his kindness. Lo’ak is the child that could have been born just from Jake’s rib. Jake Sully’s child in appearance, blood and heart.

Jake is scared for him because of that, the last thing that he desires for his boy is the same road and mistakes.

Ending with stained hands and uncountable sins. That simple thought makes Jake want to eat Lo'ak to make him reborn without the curse of being like Jake Sully."

The second one is from the sixth chapter of Look at me (on the horns of a dilemma), this one is mortly bc i suffered writing this with my impostor sindrome hitting me in my guts while my lack of english was not helping me at all, writing something more ambicious than i did before, and im proud that atleast i made to not gave up in it in the process.

"“After days spent doubtful and afraid, Fabian made the decision to free his little brother from Christian’s claws. So, in the dead of night when the eldest boy returned to the house, Fabian mustered the courage to sneak into his brother’s room and steal the shed’s key. When he managed to grab the keys without making noise, he didn't waste any time and ran to the shed so fast his legs ached. He opened the door with trembling hands, but what he was met with was not something he recognized as his brother.”

Lo’ak doesn’t want to feel like he’s walking in a tightrope anymore. He doesn’t want to feel like every breath he takes is a step closer to falling into a void, never to see the sun again. Lo’ak wants to be capable of at least knowing what he really wants for his future, something that is not swimming.

“A chained wolf-beast was what he saw. A beast with a big mouth that contained deadly, stained fangs. A beast with claws that appeared larger than Fabian’s head. It began to growl, which let out a putrid scent from its mouth. The boy froze in front of the thing that he once called a child, staring into its eyes. Dark, foggy-red orbs replacing the warm amber, erasing any trace of innocence, leaving only the dreadful ferocity. Fabian would have begun to cry if not for the sudden sound of the door closing. His heart stopped when he tried to open it and found out that it was locked. He started to scream, begging to be let out. This seemed to irritate the beast behind him, its growls getting louder with every cry. He heard Christian’s voice through the other side of the door, ‘This is what happens when you don’t listen’.”

Lo’ak is aware that the people around him would not even stand him being their sight if they knew about his forbidden lust and he understands why.

“No matter how Fabian begged or cried or screamed, Christian, the perfect son and brother, left his little brother trapped with a monster that, with the sunrise, would wake up as a kid again. A kid that would wake up with blood coating his skin and a new corpse that wasn’t from a sheep.”

But the Sully's middle child can’t stop thinking about his younger self. If the kid that Lo’ak was could see him in the present, what would his impression be?"

Thanks for the asks!!!

[fortjester]

8+16 for the ask game!

8. What song would make a great fic (to either write or read)?

[rubs my grotty little hands together, cracks open my "lyrics to use as fic titles document"] not sure if this means like, plot of a song or the vibes some of the lyrics give off, but i'm obsessed w Montreal/Feel Better/7 O'Clock by Penelope Scott, vibes wise. As far as plotty songs tho.... I mean, literally anything from Preacher's Daughter by Ethel Cain would work (Sun Bleached Flies is my favourite, but I'm also very partial to Western Nights, for obvious tlt reasons), and same goes for Strange Trails by Lord Huron (Dead Man's Hand and Frozen Pines are my go-to's).

16. What’s an AU you would love to read (or have read and loved)?

oh god, you know what? i have this one griddlehark au floating around in my mind 24/7 that i will never ever be able to write, but i'm truly absolutely obsessed w it. i would go insane in the membrane (bonkers in fucking yonkers) to read a sort of Queen's Gambit/chess champion duo au. I know almost nothing abt chess strategy, can't remember the piece's names half the time, but i love chess media, and the idea of gideon and harrow, canonically weirdass geniuses, being put in a room full of snarky intellectuals w chess boards? i'd lose my entire fucking brain fr

ask game

[chi1d0fcain]

As someone who have literally witnessed this, your feelings are beyond valid. I love u so much. Preacher’s daughter and everything you have ever made mean so much to me and they are literal masterpieces. Honestly, i mostly like the jokes in hopes of them reaching a bigger audience simply because i love u and i h8 how rare it is to find ethel stans in real life who know the lore and obsesses over it as much as me. And sometimes one reel could be the spark that starts all that. Giving u more streams and hopefully more money to fund more projects and hopefully physicals because i NEED IT. Is that selfish? Probably. Does it come with negatives? Absolutely. Is it worth it? As a barb first and foremost I think it totally is. Nicki is such a perfect example. Because she decides how seriously to take us. And treats the fans as literal children when they go crazy yet we always feel like we can joke with her and always appreciate her genius work all together. I feel like it’s something that all public figures have to deal with once famous enough and cannot be avoided.

I can never understand how you personally feel about this from your pov, and all the comments u receive but i find its very important and healthy for u to just simply filter these unserious people out whenever youre not in the mood and like. Log off. Or move to a different platform like nicki with queen radio which was literally the point of these radio shows that have now become as simple as ig lives. Not everybody has the energy to keep up with those esp if theyre boring in the beginning or maybe just stick more to tumbler or alt accounts whenever u want to discuss your art and those who care WILL be there to give u every ounce of support. But honestly these jokes are just another way of showing support and love. To these people and meme pages this is charity and their way of helping u gain more global attention and success which we all believe you deserve because of the greatness of your art. Whether u agree or disagree. I really appreciate the new album title and hope it shoos away the unserious children. But it is what it is. While we who care about u most will take these rants very seriously, those same people you complained about wont even read it. So yeah. Try these things. When u see something blown out of context yell at us in a simple story. When u wanna get serious, simple address the fans seriously just like a parent does. This way u ensure control over the fandom and maintain mutual respect and support! Those of us who love u wont go no matter how much u cuss us out. So let your emotions out. And we will always try to make fame a more pleasant experience. But as we all know its a curse. That also comes with benefits. Not saying this just as a barb, but everybody envies the relationship we have with nicki. She was literally in the middle of the street with fans surrounding her and she was doing a better job than crowd control + cops. And i know you are as great and as capable of such things despite how difficult it may seem. Keep reminding yourself that you have all the power over us. You can punish us with delays reward us with surprises etc. this is literally what nicki does. Like actual. Kids. And when u do that, us real fans feel entitled to play the big sister role, and we start individually making sure the childish people who don’t appreciate your art stay in their place. I hope u get my point. I love u so much. I wish i could elaborate more but i fear i already wrote too much and i really want u to read it so i dont want it to be overwhelming even tho its very messy and all over the place and i suck at explaining myself i really hope you see where im cominh from as i can literally go on about this for hours. Really wish i could help more. U got this tho! Love u to the moon and back.

Sincerely, a fellow child of cain.

P.s. even after all this i WILL add that i STILL would d13 to get my hands on your entire discography even unreleased pressed on vinyl. Not because im not taking u seriously, but because this is sooo important to me and we feel like the more we ask the more demand the higher the chance of getting what we want! Again, if this bothers you, you MUST go the parent route. Address the subject. Say that youre working on it. Or not interested in it right now. Show us that you hear every single one of us and simply respond accordingly instead of bottling it up and let it get to u. I promise if u address the issue once twice and thrice u will feel it go away. I know that it can be overwhelming as im neurodivergent myself, but its the most effective way to tackle this and to make this a better experience for u. After all you are the head of the snake and u have all the power. Do not. Forget it. Most of us real fans would bend to your will so fast. U simply need to own it and believe that you deserve it. Which you absolutely do. Speaking from nothing but experience as a barb for more than 10 years, and someone who had a fanpage was friends with big fan pages and knew the owners personally and a recovering chronically online member of many fandoms. Trying to drastically limit my online time but id do anything to even attempt make u happier and try to be of help

Hello very much :)

I thought about making a video on this topic but I decided to just write it out in a post instead. Either way, I'd like to speak a bit more specifically about a drunk rant I made on a separate account the other day that was not as well put together as I'd like to stand as my viewpoints on the subject.

tl:dr, I just feel as though there's a lack of sincerity in the world these days. I speak from personal experience as an artist putting things out into the world, yes, but also as a human being interacting with other human beings on the regular, and I have had my sentiments echoed by many other friends of mine over the past year or so, both artists and non-artists alike. Most of this will be framed through the consumption of art, because that's my own personal passion in this life of mine, but also the way we interface with each other and process the world around us. Now, don't get me wrong, I love to laugh. I love a good joke, and I love lightheartedness as much as the next person. But I saw someone this morning put it very succinctly in response to my rant, something along the lines of "don't let the joke about it overtake the source material." It feels as though it's a common occurrence these days to take a pinch of something with a lot more weight to it, often a humorous bit, and then run with it. Everyone then gathers around the pinch to ooh and ahh and consume it as a whole. Context is immediately lost, the legacy of that body of work becomes its own caricature, and anyone discovering that body of work via said caricature may forgo a piece of art they would otherwise love because "there's nothing there". And don't think this is me griping at those making jokes at the expense of my art. I make jokes about my own art. But when the joke dies, yet continues to grow, and spread, and finds its way back to me both on the internet and off for months (or, God forbid, years) to come, I can't help but say to myself; what the fuck is happening. Artists have fled the public and all their outlets for personality and expression outside the medium because they feel ridiculed. It's not even just their art. Katya comes to mind, speaking on how she went on youtube live a few years back in literal tears talking about police brutality and the injustices marginalized communities were facing at the hands of the government. Meanwhile, the entire comment section "yass" and "mother"ed her in barrages, not paying attention to anything she had to say. I get asked about when I'm dropping Preacher's Daughter vinyl en masse in response to my Palestine fundraiser links. It's everywhere and it's inescapable. No one can be serious for even two seconds.

This may all sound obnoxious; so be it. I tie strings from this central problem to many other complaints I have heard repeated ad nauseam the past few years. For example; the death of subculture. Goth, punk, whatever, you name it. People who built an underground counterculture movement with a rich history based on a love of art, community, and otherwise misunderstood worldviews and experiences deemed foul or inappropriate. Now we see bits taken from it, the terms and the looks, without any of the meat, spread thin across society as a whole. Words mean nothing anymore. One can rest on history and say they were a part of it when in fact, they did nothing. No appreciation or understanding to be had for the love and passion that built it. No serious interaction with the culture's very real confines and boundaries, just mindless co-opting. This has just as much to do with late stage capitalism as it does with excessive humor in lieu of sincerity, but it's certainly both. Again, this may sound like a silly complaint, but I don't care. The collective ennui we're all experiencing has a very real reason, whether we're ready to acknowledge or not.

In a twisted thread, it's even tied to our lack of care to change the world around us. People cheer on the idea of communism, but who among us is ready to give up the convenience of society as it stands? Amazon prime, doordash, fresh fruit out of season as I saw someone mention in a similar post last week; the marvels of modern technology. Do we really think these things can last in a society that isn't actively destroying the planet? We talk about the idea of something all day long but have very little to do with the actuality of what we're talking about. And don't think I consider myself exempt from this problem. I couldn't even try to claim to be. It seems nearly silly to be complaining, then, about the way people consume the art around them these days as we creep towards what feels like the end of days. But as long as I still draw breath, I must complain.

I miss genuine passion. As an autistic individual, when I'm alone, sometimes I cannot contain myself with how things make me feel. The music I listen to, the video games I play, the books I read. I almost feel the need to run through the house and scream in everyone's face how I'm feeling. It feels good to love intensely. Now, I won't pretend like autistic people haven't been bullied for this since the dawn of time, but there is surely a noticeable lack of passion in everything these days. Everyone can feel it, everyone is talking about it. Everything now is "cringe", or "doing too much", or "not that serious". Actually, it is that serious. Insecurity in one's own deeper feelings may not be a new thing, but a culture that seems to promote this eschewing of them does seem to be a new evil. The tone of the internet has completely shifted. I spent most of my time here when I first discovered it a little over a decade ago on Zelda forums and other chat-based websites, talking about how much I loved whatever fandom I was in at the time and having genuine and memorable interactions with like-minded individuals who felt the same way I do. Now, you have two options; if you hate media, you rip it to shreds, and if you love it, you word-salad it to death and parrot a joke about it that someone else said. I'm not saying people don't still talk seriously in a heartfelt way about the things they love, but it does not seem to be the initial reaction anymore. Do I have a solution to this problem? Of course not. I'm a 26 year old girl posting on a tumblr blog. If I had a solution, this is not where I would be dropping it. But conversation is God to man, and I believe in the ability to change things from the inside out. We make the rules, and we can change them.

Before I go, I'd like to just clarify that I am very grateful for my career, grateful to anyone who has ever given me and my art the time of day, grateful to anyone who has ever come up to me and connected with me over my work, and grateful for a life where someone making too many jokes is the worst part of my day. I do not think I am better nor smarter than anyone on or off the internet. I am simply a girl with big feelings and I enjoy talking about them with other people with big feelings, and it makes me sad when something avoidable or unnecessary gets in the way of that.

All in all, I love to love, and I love all of you, I love my life, I love this record, and mi amore vo- i mean.... oh, whatever.

(Feel free to sound off in the comments and please be nice to each other)

[zannolin]

1 3 and 19!!! 🎧🎶

1. three songs that come up when you put your phone on shuffle

please forgive me. i do not have music on my phone. i will instead put my gen 4 ipod nano (main playlist one not to be confused with my second gen 4 ipod nano exclusively for my 80s playlist) on shuffle.

"message from pegasus" steve mcdonald

"main title" wizard of oz

"knowing me, knowing you" abba

i feel like this exposes things about me i wasn't ready to have exposed.

3. three songs you were recently obsessed with

no repeats so i won't say "pink pony club" by chappell roan tho that does count. since it says "were" i will also not include "the moment of truth" by survivor or "against the wind" by bob seger. what does that leave me with. let's see.

"17th street treatment centre" john k. samson (this man's music blows my brains out)

"linger" the cranberries (oooaarrruughhghg)

"american teenager" ethel cain (still looping it. tbh.)

19. three songs that are your guilty pleasure

ohhhh. well. hm. promise me you won't judge me okay i can't control my upbringing.

"so many books" michael card (LISTEN. listen. sometimes i just have to listen to christian songs from my childhood this one bangs it's so jangly i love it. am i singing it about the bible no. but i DO have so many books and so little time.)

"breakfast" the newsboys (this is literally just another christian song from my childhood that i'm obsessed with. there's a lot of them.)

"stay for awhile" amy grant (hey would you look at that it's ANOTHER chr- [i am forcibly removed from the stage for having poor music taste and failing atheism) (this is a joke) (i don't even know if i'm an atheist) (whatever it's a DAMN good song y'all)

song asks!

[jchnmcdonough]

So sorry I keep harassing you, but do you have any songs that remind you of John? Some of mine are Serene Queen, Thunder, Velvet Crowbar, & Dealer. (Honestly I always do mental gymnastics to make Lana songs fit him lol)

so, so, so, so many! i too have a tendency to reach as far as i can to connect it back to john. i have a tendency to stray away from modern-esque songs tweaking my playlist for him (tho i do this for any character in and you salute me, miss america) so it can be a bit hard at times as I like character playlists to fit the aesthetic of universe the fic fits into while also taking into consideration what I think the character would listen to as well as overall 'this is what the general feeling the character gives me/other characters.' Er...bit of word vomit, but a tldr would be there's no, let's say, sex pistols, as that musical genre doesn't fit the vibe of the universe im writing, and I also don't think john, in his current form and era he lives, would listen to them.

anywho, onto the important part of the question! no shock i take a ton of inspo from lana/her lizzy grant days, so no surprise there's tons of her everywhere on any music playlist i create for this fic (i mean the title of my fic is quite literally a lyric of hers aha)

no particular order, just some off the top of my head

she's got you - patsy cline

my way - frank sinatra

velvet crowbar (glad to see someone else is aware of this underrated masterpiece) - lana

for k, part II - lana

jump - lana

kill kill - lana

24 hours - lana

cult leader - lana

art deco - lana

family tree (intro) - ethel cain

sunday morning - the velvet underground

gloomy sunday - billie holiday

easy living - billie holiday

good morning, heartache - billie holiday

peace - lana

i've been thinking of posting some character playlists, but i've already stretched my hands thin with what i want to do for the fic/lore and im now becoming more active on my main. i also have a goodneighbor radio playlist that i'll def post at some point.

[emiliosandozsequence]

Omg playlist ❤: "sickly sweet"

OOO. yes yes i like >:3 this one was rly hard to do tho for some dumb reason which is why it's shorter than the other ones

sippy cup – melanie martinez

bubblegum bitch – marina and the diamonds

crush – ethel cain

barren – nicole dollanganger

primadonna girl – marina and the diamonds

hurricane – msmr

flicker – porter robinson

give me a playlist title and i’ll give you 5-10 songs!!

[zannolin]

hi hi 9 12 and 20!! -kai

hello kai :)

9. Do you write every day? If you wrote today, share a sentence of what you’ve written!

i did almost every day in january and i'd like to keep doing that but february has been atrocious and my fiction professor even more so, so i haven't written much this month. i did get out 1k today, though, so here's a bit i just wrote:

There’s music and dancing spilling out into the single road that runs through the center of town, and the tightness in Jason’s chest loosens just a little to see that good has come of their losses, and there’s more to come in every year that passes from today until—well, until Jason doesn’t know when. Forever, maybe.

12. Do you have a playlist for your current WIP(s)? Share it!

i do not. i almost never make playlists. been listening to "televangelism" by ethel cain and "the battle" from the narnia ost a lot while working on things lately tho.

20. What’s a favorite title for a fic you’ve written?

oh god either planetarium stickers or swallowing jupiter for sure. i do love split ends but like those two Hit.

ask game!!