#not much smut but oh well

[eternalreignblog]

74 (huddling for warmth) and 90 (unexpected virgin) for GP Clarke

Great. Just fucking great.

Clarke was mentally and physically drained after spending all day climbing a cold ass mountain to keep her best friend company, and now her so-called 'bestie' had ditched her to go hook up with some, admittedly hot as fuck woman, but still, who dumps their climbing partner in the middle of bum fuck nowhere, in the freezing cold, just for some ass?

Bitch.

Clarke had just finished setting up her two person tent, which was supposed to house her and Raven, that is until the other woman had set her eyes on Miss Cheekbones, and dissapeared off into the dark.

She was muttering to herself, cursing Raven under her breath as she hammered in the final peg, tossing her tools in a pile before starting to set up her sleeping bag for the night. She heard footsteps behind her, and without looking yelled, "come crawling back after all the works done? Cheekbones didn't rock your world enough to stay?" She growled, letting her temper flare a bit

A soft chuckle had Clarke spinning around in surprise, because that was definitely not Raven.

"Oh, she's rocking her world all right. So much so I can't be near that tent anymore," a gorgeous brunette approached, hugging herself around the waist for warmth, looking cautiously at Clarke.

"Shit, I'm sorry, I thought you were my idiot best friend," Clarke apologised, a feeling stirring below her beltline as she raked her eyes over the woman.

"Well, it appears your idiot best friend is hooking up with my idiot best friend, very loudly I might add, in the tent I was supposed to be sleeping in,"

"Oh," Clarke said. Staring like an idiot at the woman who looked unfairly attractive rugged up in winter climbing gear.

"I know we don't know each other and this might be a bit weird, but I'm extremely cold and I have no other place to stay," The woman said almost pleadingly, looking at Clarke with what could only be described as puppy dog eyes.

"Oh," Clarke finally pulled herself out of her stunned silence.

"Sorry, I'l didn't mean to freak you out, I'll sort something out," the woman said dejectedly, moving to leave Clarke’s camp-site.

"No!" Clakre called out, lamenting her lack of brain function at the moment, whether it was due to the cold or the pretty girl, well, she wasn't going to speculate. "I mean, no, it's fine, you can stay with me. You'll freeze to death out there by yourself," Clarke held open the tent flap to invite the beautiful stranger in.

"God, thank you," the woman sounded releaved as she joined Clarke in the slightly-warmer-than-the-outside-temperature tent.

They looked at each other a little awkwardly, crawling around the tiny space until they were both kind of settled.

"Um, my sleeping stuff is still in my tent, I didn't want to interrupt the sex marathon to get it," the woman said sheepishly, looking longingly at Clarke’s sleeping bag.

"Oh, I mean, we can share, it is way too cold to not have cover," Clarke justified, unzipping her sleeping bag to make a doona as her new tent mate divested herself of her jacket.

"I owe you for this?" She looked up at Clarke, an unspoken question in her eyes for Clarke to finish the sentence with as-yet-not-shared information.

"Clarke," Clarke added, filling the gap.

"Lexa," the womam said with a smile tickling her upper lip.

"Well, now we're practically friends, why don't you join me under here," Clarke said in what she hoped was the least creepy way possible as she held the doona up for Lexa to crawl under.

Obliging, Lexa slid in beside Clarke, careful not to get too close as Clarke lowered the cover down over her.

"Oh god that's so much better," Lexa said, relaxing into the warmth.

"Yeah," Clarke said weakly, voice failing her as she tried to fight down the boner that was involuntarily rising at the sound of Lexa's sexy voice.

"Can I come closer?" Lexa asked after a short period of silence, Clarke unable to form words and simply grunting in a manner that she hoped implied the affimative.

She felt Lexa's body shift closer, and panicked as her butt pushed directly into Clarke’s crotch. There was no way she wouldn't notice her bulge, and Clarke could do nothing but lay perfectly still and wallow in mortification.

She did not expect Lexa to get that close.

And now she was going to run away because Clarke was a creep who couldn't keep her hormones in check.

"Is that-- are you--" Lexa stammered and Clarke tried to shink into the smallest space possible.

This is what always happens.

She meets hot girl.

Hot girl gets close.

Hot girl finds out about her dick.

Hot girl runs away.

Clarke wanted to dissapear, she felt the usual guilt and shame rising to the surface and choked out a quiet "I'm sorry,"

"What?" Lexa sounded surprised as she rolled over to face Clarke, barely visible in the darkness of the tent.

"I-- I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable," Clarke rehashes her usual apology, looking anywhere but at Lexa.

"Uncomfortable? Fuck, Clarke, the only Uncomfortable you've make me is Uncomfortabley fucking wet,"

It took several moments for Clarke to process the words, but when she did, her heart rate shot up like a rocket.

"Sorry, what?" She needed to hear it again to be sure because what the fuck was happening right now?

"Clarke," Lexa said, placing a hand on Clarke’s hip and shifting closer. "Let's be real right now. Our friends are fucking. We're alone here in this tent in the middle of nowhere. It's fucking freezing." She was ticking off facts and Clarke wasn't sure where this was headed. "Your hot and I think we should fuck to keep warm," Lexa finished her talk like she was stating a perfectly reasonable thing and Clarke was speechless.

"Er..." she stammered, words failing her as her brain malfunctioned.

"Unless you don't want to?" Lexa asked, doubt in her voice, forcing Clarke to find her voice again.

"Fuck, Lexa, you're hot as fuck, of course I want to, it's just..." she trailed off, hating herself a little for her lack of experience.

"What is it, Clarke?" Lexa asked softly, her hand tracing patterns on Clarke's hip, dipping under the waistband to touch her skin.

"I-- fuck, I've never, you know," she trailed off, knowing she'd probably lost her chance.

"You're a virgin?" Lexa asked, and Clarke could hear the surprise in her voice

"Yeah," Clarke said dejectedly, knowing she'd probably blown her chance.

After barely a moments hesitation, Lexa asked, "Do you want to not be?"

Clarke looked into Lexa eyes, and even in the darkness she could see the lust reflected back at her.

"Fuck, Lexa. I want you so bad," Clarke breathed in a husky voice as she gripped Lexa hips and dragged her closer, pressing her arousal into the other woman so there could be no doubt how desperate she was for it.

"Then let's do this," Lexa said assertively, pushing Clarke onto her back and straddling her.

Lexa was clearly on a mission as she divested herself and Clarke of their clothes, before climbing back on top. She took several moments to worship Clarke’s breasts while Clarke lay there enjoying the attention, before sliding a hand down to stroke Clarke’s cock.

Clarke moaned loudly at the contact, it being the first hand that had touched her that wasn't her own.

"Fuck, you're huge," Lexa said in awe as she lined Clarke up with her pussy, before looking back dow at her for consent. "You ready?" She asked, and Clarke had no doubt that if she said no, Lexa would stop.

But, fuck that.

"Fuck yes," Clarke said enthusiastically as she planted her hands on Lexa's hips, feeling her sink down onto her inch by inch.

The feeling of slick wet heat encasing her cock for the first time was a sensation that Clarke would never forget. Lexa bottomed out, moaning in pleasure as Clarke filled her completely.

"Fuck you feel so good," she praised as she started a slow grind.

Clarke was in pure, unadulterated ecstacy.

The problem was she could feel her orgasm creeping up almost immediately.

"Oh shit, Lexa, I'm not going to last," she cried out, gripping Lexa's hips tightly as she moved on top.

"Hmm fuck, me too, you got me so fucking horny," Lexa said as she rubbed her clit furiously.

Lexa started bouncing and that was it for Clarke. She groaned and threw her head back in pleasure as she unloaded inside the woman she'd only met a few hours ago. Her hips thrust up into Lexa as she came harder than she'd ever cum before, knowing this moment was forever etched into her memory.

As she came back down to earth, she realised belatedly that she'd blown far too quickly and Lexa hadn't even cum

"Oh, shit, I'm sorry," she apologised, and Lexa just chuckled lightly in response.

"No need to apologise, we've got all night," she said with a smile as she leaned down to plant an absolutely filthy kiss on Clarke's lips, and Clarke could already feel the stirring down below.

Oh yes, she thought, this is going to be a long ass night.

[onismdaydream]

thinking about perv yuji (like i always do) who sneaks into your room when you're sleeping because the panties he stole no longer smell like you or your laundry detergent. they feel nice around his cock, sure, but he wants to smell you, wants to pretend he can taste you. so he goes to get new ones. he even sees a pair that doesn't look familiar from when he looks up your skirts (he swears he doesn't mean to, it's just that your skirts are so short and well, he's right there...)

he takes them in his hand, feels the smooth and silky fabric and thumbs at the little bow. they're cute. he hopes you don't mind if he borrows them for a bit.

but then you stir. a quiet rustle of sheets and a soft groan as you get comfortable, but yuji's perks up at the sound. his gaze actually settles on you, now that his eyes are adjusted, and he feels his cock twitch at the sight. you just look so peaceful and pretty.

and of course he can't help it if his eyes drift down to see your body. the tank top is loose on you, enough that yuji can get a good look at your cleavage. that's one thing he wishes you would show off more — he'd love to get a more accurate representation of you in his mind when he jacks off.

another quiet noise and his gaze moves back to your lips, slightly parted and so damn kissable. if only yuji could feel your soft lips against his...

against his better judgement, yuji takes his cock out, promising himself he can only look. he strokes himself as he watches you sleep, getting himself to full hardness. he knows he has to be quick and quiet — there's no way he could talk himself out of the situation if you woke up. but the sight of his leaking tip so close to your pretty mouth makes him dizzy.

it takes a pathetically short amount of time before he cums in his hand, a few drops falling to the floor of your bedroom. you're still blissfully unaware of what your friend is doing, still in a deep sleep as he carefully swipes his thumb along your bottom lip. a small smear of his cum for you to taste when you wake up.

[jetii]

By Your Name

Part Two

Pairing: Wrecker x fem!Reader / Wrecker x Jedi!Reader

Words: 11,228/19,226

Tags/Warnings: angst with a happy ending, hurt/comfort, forbidden romance, unrequited feelings, love confessions, some kissing and heavy petting, smut in part 2

Summary: Ever since you were assigned to the squad, Wrecker has delighted in calling you pet names in Mando'a — an'edee, cyar'ika, mesh'la, the list goes on. Little does he know, you understand every single one of them, and it's starting to become a problem.

A/N: I wrote this months ago and got around to editing it recently and whoa, was not prepared for the sad. Sorry about that! This is mostly self-contained to part one, with part two being purely a smut add-on for my own amusement. I'll post that next week.

Previous Work | Next Work | Masterlist

You hit the ground hard, skidding to a stop face down in the dirt, your whole body aching. The ringing in your ears slowly subsides, and the sounds of battle come back in bits and pieces. The roar of blasterfire, the clatter of droids and metal feet, and crunch of tanks rolling over rubble. You groan and turn yourself over onto your back, coughing and trying to get the taste of dirt out of your mouth, just in time to see a droid bearing down on you, cannon aimed.

You try to move, but you’re completely winded. Your lightsaber was thrown from your grasp when you were sent flying, and it lay several feet away, taunting you with the idea of your own survival. You close your eyes and prepare for the worst, waiting for the searing pain of a laser bolt tearing through you

There’s the sound of metal tearing as a large hand grips the droid’s head and rips it clean off its neck, and your eyes fly open as the metal body falls to the ground in a clatter of lifeless metal, its head still in the hands of your savior.

You look up and meet Wrecker’s eyes, and he pushes his helmet up with the back of his hand to offer you a toothy grin, the droid head held aloft in the other. The relief at seeing him alive and well washes over you like a tide, and you can only manage a weak smile back, your ribs smarting from the impact of your fall.

"That was a close one!" he says, tossing the head away like a child throwing a ball for a dog. It pings off the chest of a droid advancing on the pair of you, sending the metal soldier careening backwards.

"A little too close for my liking," you wheeze, and you take his offered hand. Wrecker pulls you to your feet with ease, the motion tugging you close to his chest, and his arm wraps around you to steady you.

“You okay, cyar’ika?” he shouts over the sound of another tank exploding, a cloud of debris flying up and raining down around you in a shower of dust and smoke. You nod, the movement stiff and stilted, and you pray he doesn’t notice the flush on your cheeks at the use of that Mando'a word.

And that's the problem, isn't it? Cyar’ika, sarad, mesh’la, all the words he said to you in his native tongue, thinking you wouldn't know the difference. It made your heart race and your head spin, and the fact that you understood exactly what they meant only made it worse. It was like a secret between you two, one you weren't supposed to know.

The words made your heart do cartwheels, but the tone he said them in?

That was what was really going to kill you.

The soft way he said the words, the gentle, affectionate way he looked at you when he thought you weren’t paying attention, the way his hand seemed to linger on your shoulder after pulling you back up from a fall, the way his smile made your knees weak... It all came together to paint a picture of how Wrecker felt. It was a picture that made your face feel warm and your throat dry, and it was one that was starting to drive you crazy.

It also drove you to distraction, so much so that you hadn't even noticed the AAT firing at you until you were flying through the air.

And now you're here, in Wrecker's arms, your heart beating fast for more than one reason. You take a moment to gather yourself before stepping back, Wrecker's arm falling reluctantly from around your shoulders, and you give him a grin that's a little stronger this time.

"I'm alright, thank you!" you shout back. "We need to stop that tank!"

Wrecker nods, and the two of you turn to face the massive tank, which was slowly making its way through the city, demolishing everything in its path. The cannons swivel back and forth, destroying a building to your right, then to the left, then forward.

You call your lightsaber back into your hand, and it flies past Wrecker's head into your awaiting palm. You ignite the blade and glance at him, and he grins and cracks his knuckles before slamming his helmet back onto his head.

"Ready, cyare?"

Your breath catches in your throat. It wasn't the word you thought he'd use, but the endearment has the same effect. He doesn't seem to realize what he's said, and you decide not to bring it up.

You can think about it later. For now, you had a droid army to stop.

"Ready," you murmur.

Wrecker holds his hand out to the side, bowing his head in a courtly gesture. "After you."

You roll your eyes and step past him, and you feel the heat of his gaze on the back of your neck.

"Keep up, then."

It doesn’t get any easier.

You try your best not to let it affect your performance. You focus on the missions, on keeping your men safe, but Wrecker is always there, with a compliment or a gentle touch, and the feelings grow until they threaten to burst from your chest.

He does everything in his power to make you laugh, and every time he does, your stomach feels like it's doing backflips. He calls you pet names and winks at you, and your knees get weak. He smiles at you, and the world seems to get brighter.

He does everything he can to protect you, and you find yourself falling for him, hard.

And you can't let it show.

So you ignore the feeling, try to bury it deep inside, but you can feel it growing, day by day.

You have never wanted to tell someone how you feel so much, and yet you are absolutely terrified to do it. It's almost funny, really. You’ve stared down the barrel of a blaster a hundred times, fought dozens of battles, and yet this one man is the only one who can make your heart race.

But there's a difference. With the other things, you could always fight back, try to fix the situation. But how can you fight against feelings? How can you stop yourself from falling in love with the most wonderful person you've ever met?

You can't, and you know it.

Every night, you think about telling him, but every morning, the fear stops you. In the light of day, the idea of a Jedi and a clone being together is ridiculous. It's impossible, and you can't risk your career and his life for something so foolish. So, each time, you say nothing, and the words go unsaid, lingering between the two of you, a heavy weight that seems to follow wherever you go.

You try your hardest not to think about it, but it's like a constant buzzing, an annoying insect that's always in your ear, always nipping at your thoughts, always reminding you of something you don't want to deal with. It's dangerous, and distracting, and it makes you worry that someday, someone will find out.

And that's the most terrifying thing of all.

If the Council ever discovered what was going on between you, they would have no choice but to separate the two of you. The thought of never seeing him again fills you with a deep dread, and the knowledge that it could happen at any time drives you crazy.

Every time the thought comes to the forefront of your mind, you try to push it away, and the effort has become a daily struggle. The others have noticed your preoccupation, and have done their best to cheer you up, but even their good-natured attempts have become frustrating, the reminders of what you were trying not to think about grating on your nerves.

The only person who doesn't seem to notice is Wrecker.

It's ironic, really. It's Wrecker who causes all the trouble, and it's him who's oblivious to it. He doesn't know the effect his words have on you, and if he does, he doesn't acknowledge it.  Instead, he seems to be more affectionate, more playful, more himself than ever, and the more you try to push away your feelings, the harder they come crashing back.

It's like being caught in a riptide, unable to stop yourself from being pulled farther and farther out, no matter how much you struggle. You wish he would stop, wish he would just back off and let you think, but a part of you doesn't want him to. A part of you wants this, wants him, and it's slowly consuming the rest of you.

The only thing that keeps you sane is the knowledge that you will have to return to Coruscant soon, and that when you do, you can go back to the Order, and put the distance between you that you sorely need.

You can't hide anything from the Council. The Force is your ally and enemy, and it shows you exactly how they would react if they ever found out about you and Wrecker.

Dismissal. Disapproval. Disdain.

All things you're not ready to face, and the sooner you're separated, the better. That thought, the idea that you won't have to see Wrecker every day, helps to soothe your anxiety, and, despite the guilt and sadness it brings, you look forward to the mission ending.

The sooner you can distance yourself from him, the easier it will be.

At least, that's what you tell yourself.

You have no idea how wrong you are.

The tunnel network on Akiva is a mess, a winding labyrinth of tunnels and dead ends. The six of you have been trying to navigate them for hours now, and it's starting to take its toll. You've lost the trail of the tactical droid you're hunting multiple times, only to pick it up again an hour later. Your patience is wearing thin, and the squad is getting restless. You're all tired and hungry, and the dim, flickering lights of the tunnels are giving you a headache.

"How many turns have we made?" Crosshair asks, his voice echoing in the narrow tunnel. He's leading the pack with Hunter, whose trying his best to keep up with the trail, though it's growing colder by the minute.

"I...have lost count," Tech admits bitterly, squinting at the holographic map of the tunnels displayed on his datapad. "Perhaps we should have split up, that would have made the task—"

"Not happening," Wrecker cuts in, his voice firm.

"I wasn't finished," Tech snaps.

"Yeah, but you were gonna suggest splitting up," Wrecker says, "and that ain't gonna happen. We're all staying together."

"Tech, if we split up, we might lose each other," Hunter adds, his voice strained as he concentrates. "This trail is difficult enough to follow as it is. I don't need the distraction of trying to find a missing man on top of it."

Tech opens his mouth to reply, but stops when he catches your eye, and you give him a subtle shake of your head. He sighs and nods, looking back down at his datapad. "As always, the logical course of action is the least popular," he mutters.

Hunter snorts, but says nothing, and you and the rest of the group continue down the tunnel. You trail behind the group, trying to keep your frustration in check, when you suddenly feel a presence behind you, and you glance back to see Wrecker fall into step next to you, a small smile on his face.

"Hey," he says softly, and you can't help but return the expression. You realize what you're doing and try to school your features, but the damage is already done, and Wrecker's smile widens.

"Hi," you murmur.

"You holding up okay?" he asks.

You nod, the movement stiff. "I'm fine."

"You sure? Cause you look like you're ready to kill someone."

You grimace and glance ahead, where the others were slowly disappearing from view, and you lower your voice. "I'm sorry. It's been a long day."

"Ain't that the truth," Wrecker mutters.

"This is a mess," you sigh, glancing around the cramped, dimly lit tunnel. "We're not gonna find anything at this rate."

He shrugs, and his elbow nudges yours gently. "It'll be alright, cyar'ika. We'll find him."

The affectionate word is like a bucket of cold water thrown over your head, and your heart skips a beat. You swallow hard, and nod, hoping he can't see the flush on your cheeks.

"How can you be so sure?"

"Cause we're the best there is," Wrecker says. His arm brushes yours as the pair of you walk, and his fingers bump yours. He pulls his hand back quickly, but not before his fingertips brush against the back of your hand, and you can't suppress the shiver that runs through you. "And we have the best General in the galaxy."

"Stop," you groan, the tips of your ears burning. "I'm not the best. I've gotten us lost three times today, Wrecker. Three. If I was a better General, I would have found this stupid droid by now."

"Hey," he murmurs. "It's not your fault."

You keep your eyes on the ground, but his hand comes up and his fingers brush the back of yours. Your hand twitches, but you don't move, and his thumb runs gently over the back of your hand. You're too distracted by his touch to notice that the group had stopped walking, and it's only when Hunter speaks that you snap back to reality.

"Guys, we've got a problem."

You and Wrecker stop short, and you pull your hand from his quickly, ignoring the way his face falls. You glance up and see the other clones gathered around the entrance to a large cavern, their backs turned to you.

"What's wrong?"

Crosshair steps aside to allow you to join the group, and his eyebrow arches as his eyes flicker between you and Wrecker, a smirk crossing his face. You pointedly ignore him, and he shakes his head before returning his attention to the task at hand.

"Dead end," Hunter says.

"I don't understand," Tech murmurs. He steps forward to scan the walls and floor of the cavern with his datapad, and Echo peers over his shoulder. "According to the map, this tunnel should continue on, not stop at a room."

"Well, clearly it does," Crosshair snarks as he moves past you into the cavern. "Or are we supposed to climb the wall?"

"The structural integrity of these walls is poor," Tech replies. "Climbing would only serve to bring the ceiling down upon us."

"Then how are we supposed to get through?" Echo asks, and you bite your lip, the wheels turning in your mind.

Crosshair's flashlight pans over the walls and floor, illuminating the room, and it's then that you see the marks in the dirt. Footprints, dozens of them, some large, some small. Hunter crouches down and brushes the prints, and he frowns and pulls his glove off, running his fingers along the floor.

"These are fresh," he murmurs.

"So are these," Echo says. He and Crosshair are crouched by the far wall, examining a patch of disturbed dirt. You move to take a step forward when a chill runs up your spine, and you freeze, the hairs on the back of your neck rising.

Something is wrong.

You feel it, the air becoming thick with danger. Your muscles tense, your hands clenching at your sides, and the others must sense it, too. They rise to their feet and turn to you, their weapons ready, and the only sound is the distant dripping of water and the soft whirring of Tech's datapad.

"What is it?" Hunter whispers, his voice barely audible, but you can't answer. Your eyes dart around the cavern, searching for the threat. There's no cover in the room, nowhere to hide, and it's making your skin crawl.

"I don't know," you whisper back.

Suddenly, the ground beneath your feet starts to sha, and the men shout in alarm as the shaking gets worse. Dust falls from the ceiling, and you scramble backwards, trying not to fall as the walls start to crumble.

"Go! Go!" Hunter shouts, and the group bolts for the tunnel. You trip on a stone, and the ground cracks and splits open, swallowing the rocks whole. Wrecker grabs you and pulls you to your feet, and the pair of you race after the others, the cavern falling apart around you.

"This isn't natural!" Tech shouts, and he ducks as a rock flies towards him, missing him by inches. "The droid must have set charges!"

"Doesn't matter! Just keep moving!" Hunter yells.

There's a loud roar, and the ceiling comes crashing down. You barely have time to throw up your hands before the weight of the cave-in hits you, and your arms tremble with the effort of holding it up. Ahead of you, the others shout, but the dust and rocks muffle the sound. Your knees buckle, and the rubble starts to push down on you, your back bowing.

No, no, no, no...

The rocks shift, and your hands slip, and the ceiling starts to come down again, and all you can think is that you're not ready, not ready, not ready—

There's a flash of black, and suddenly Wrecker is diving towards you, his arms wrapping around your waist, and the two of you are thrown to the side, out of the way of the falling rocks. He wraps himself around you, his broad shoulders protecting your head, and the pair of you hit the ground hard as the rest of the cavern collapses.

The impact knocks the wind from your lungs, and you're left gasping for breath, unable to move as the cave-in rages around you, the sounds of the others muffled by the rocks. After what feels like an eternity, the noise and movement ceases, and silence settles in, save for the soft tumble of stones.

Your eyes fly open, and you're greeted with darkness. It takes a moment for them to adjust, and you blink away the grit, a shudder running through you. Your limbs feel heavy, and it's only then that you notice the crushing weight on top of you. You can feel the hard edge of plastoid digging into your chest, something softer cradling your head, and Wrecker's heavy breathing fills your ears.

"Wrecker?" you rasp.

His body moves against yours, and his helmet buried in the crook of your neck, his chest rising and falling as he pants for air.

"Yeah?"

"Are...are you okay?"

He laughs, a soft, wheezy sound, and his grip around you loosens, his arms pulling back, allowing the air to return to your lungs.

"Am I okay? I should be askin' you that!"

You laugh, the sound coming out as a half-sob, and you feel his hand cup the back of your head, his fingers threading gently through your hair. "What...what happened?"

"You almost got crushed," he replies, his voice hoarse. "Had to get you outta there."

You blink rapidly, trying to get the dust out of your eyes, and the dim light illuminates his form. He's curled around you, his body protecting yours, and his arms are still holding you tight, one wrapped around your waist, the other cupping the back of your head, his fingers gently stroking your hair.

"Oh," is all you can manage.

"Yeah," Wrecker chuckles, and his grip tightens. "'Oh' is right."

"How did you...?"

"I dunno," he mutters, and his chest rumbles with his words. "I just knew I had to get to you, no matter what."

"Well, thanks."

You swallow hard, trying to ignore the fluttering in your stomach. His hand is large enough to cradle your entire head, and his thumb gently strokes the skin of your neck. You're suddenly hyper-aware of the feeling of him pressed against you, the weight of him, the warmth, the smell of metal and dirt and sweat, and you can't help the way your face heats up.

Your hand pushes at his chest plate, and his grip on you loosens. "Uh, we should—"

"Right!" Wrecker exclaims as his arms unwrap from around you. "Sorry!"

"No, no, it's okay!"

"I shoulda let go sooner," he babbles, and you can hear the flush in his voice. "I didn't mean to..."

"It's fine," you assure him, and you sit up, wincing at the aches and pains in your body. You can hear him move beside you, his armor scraping the floor as he stands, and a moment later, a gloved hand appears in front of your face.

"Need a hand?"

"Thanks," you say, and Wrecker helps you up. The pair of you stand for a moment, listening to the silence around you. The room is dark, the only illumination coming from the narrow gaps in the stones above you, and the occasional shift sends dust falling from the ceiling.

“—al…Wrecker! Are you alright?" Hunter's voice crackles through the comms, the sound distorted by static.

"I'm okay," Wrecker replies, stepping back a little as he activates his comm. He pauses and glances down at you, and his head tilts slightly, like he's looking you over.

"What is it?" you ask, and Wrecker hesitates, his fingers brushing yours.

"You sure you're alright, cyar'ika?"

The endearment is like a slap to the face, and you blink rapidly, taken aback.

"I'm fine, thank you," you say, trying to keep your voice steady.

Wrecker doesn't seem convinced, and his fingers curl around yours. "You don't sound fine."

"I am."

"Really?"

"Yes, Wrecker," you snap. "I'm fine."

"Wrecker, report!" Hunter's voice demands, and Wrecker pulls his hand from yours and activates his comm again.

"We're okay," he says. "Me and the General."

"Thank the Maker," Hunter replies. "What happened?"

You let Wrecker answer while you try to calm yourself, your heart pounding against your ribs. It's just a word, you tell yourself, and yet the knowledge that he was willing to put himself in harm's way, risk being crushed by the rocks just to get to you...

You're not sure how much more of this you can take.

"Is anyone injured?" you ask, cutting off Wrecker mid-sentence.

"No," Hunter replies. "A few bumps and bruises, nothing serious."

"Good," you say. You walk toward the wall of rubble, reaching out with the Force and testing it, searching for a way out. There are gaps here and there, large enough for a person to fit through, but the amount of debris is daunting, and you know that without tools, the task would take hours.

"Well, this is a karking mess," Crosshair grumbles, speaking your thoughts aloud.

“You can say that again,” you say. “We’ll try to dig our way out, but it might take a while."

“Negative,” Tech’s voice cuts in immediately. “This tunnel system is too unstable. Any further attempts to excavate the debris could result in further cave-ins, which could cause catastrophic structural damage.”

You sigh, leaning your head against the rocks. "So we're stuck?"

"It would appear so," Tech replies, and you can practically hear him grimace.

“What are your orders, General?” Echo asks. You can tell by the sound of his voice that he knows what you’re about to say, but the question still makes your stomach twist. You take a deep breath, trying to calm yourself, but the feeling of the walls closing in is growing, and the anxiety is starting to become overwhelming.

"You're going to have to leave us," you say softly.

The words are met with a chorus of protests, and you squeeze your eyes shut, trying to block out the noise. Behind you, Wrecker has fallen silent, and his eyes are burning into the back of your skull, his presence looming, waiting.

"You'll be walking blind," Hunter argues. "Without Tech, you could get lost."

"Or crushed," Crosshair snarks.

"It's dangerous," Echo adds.

"It is," you reply. "But we can't stay here. We need to find the tactical droid, and the longer we wait, the colder the trail gets. So get moving. That's an order."

There's a moment of silence, then: "Copy that."

“May the Force be with you,” you reply, and you turn off your comm and close your eyes.

The silence seems deafening after the sound of the voices, and you stand there for a moment, collecting yourself. You can still feel Wrecker behind you, and his presence is as comforting as it is suffocating. You take a deep breath and steel yourself before turning to face him, and you offer him a small smile.

"Ready to get outta here?"

He doesn't reply, and his gaze is so intense that it makes your skin crawl. You clear your throat and glance away, and when you look back, he's still staring.

"Wrecker?"

"You really think they're gonna leave us here?"

"They don't have a choice," you say gently. "And neither do we."

He grunts, but says nothing, and he turns away to scan the rubble, the flashlight on his helmet casting eerie shadows on the walls. You watch him as he walks the perimeter of the cave, and it's not until he's made his third trip around the space that he speaks again.

"There's a gap over here," he calls, and you cross the cavern to join him.

He's right; the rocks have formed a tunnel, large enough for you to crawl through, and when you peek through the other side, the tunnel stretches on for several meters, the walls and floor clear of debris.

"Well, at least we have somewhere to start," you murmur.

"I'll go first," Wrecker offer, and he drops to his knees and crawls into the opening, his wide shoulders brushing the stone. You follow close behind, crawling over the jagged rocks, and when you reach the other side, Wrecker grabs your arm and helps you stand.

"Thanks," you murmur, and the pair of you turn and shine your lights down the tunnel. It stretches on ahead of you, twisting and turning, the path vanishing around a corner.

"When I get my hands on that droid..." Wrecker growls.

"If I don't get to it first," you mutter, and the two of you set off down the tunnel.

It's slow-going, with the two of you constantly checking for traps or pitfalls, and the longer you walk, the more nervous you become. It's too quiet, and the tension between you and Wrecker is thick, like an unspoken word lingering in the air.

You've been trying to think of something to say, but every time you open your mouth, your throat dries up, and the words die on your tongue. Every time, you convince yourself to tell him how you feel, and how you can't deal with his attention, his affection, but each time, your nerves get the better of you, and you lose the courage.

After a while, you turn and glance back at him, and his gaze is locked on you, his head tilted.

"What?" you ask, and the word is sharper than you intended, but the tension is starting to make your skin itch.

"Nothin'," he says. You can hear the smile in his voice, and you sigh and look ahead again, trying not to think about his eyes on you.

"Stop looking at me like that," you grumble.

"Like what?" he asks, his voice low.

"I don't know," you say, your frustration getting the better of you. "Just...just stop."

He falls silent, and you bite the inside of your cheek, the guilt starting to eat at you. It's not his fault, you remind yourself. You're the one who has the problem. He's doing what he always does, and it's driving you insane, and he has no idea, and it's not his fault, it's yours.

"I'm sorry," you murmur.

"No, no, it's okay," he replies. "I'll...I'll try not to stare."

You can hear the disappointment in his voice, and you swallow the lump in your throat. It's not his fault, it's yours.

"Thank you," is all you manage to say.

Silence settles in again, and the two of you continue on, your footsteps echoing off the walls. Wrecker keeps his promise and doesn't look at you, and it only makes the tension worse, the distance between you yawning wider.

It's hard to see anything in the dark, and the tunnel seems endless. The walls are crumbling, and the ceiling is low, and every time the stone shifts, you're afraid the tunnel will collapse on you, and that'll be the end of the Jedi and her trooper, crushed in the tunnels on Akiva. It's not the way you expected to go out, but you suppose it could be worse.

It's not a very Jedi-like thought, and you shake your head, trying to clear your mind. The exhaustion is starting to creep up on you, the long day finally catching up, and you're not sure how much longer you can stay focused.

"You okay, mesh'la?"

Wrecker's voice, soft and low, catches you by surprise, and you glance up to see him watching you, his head cocked. You're not sure what's worse, the fact that he can see right through you, or the fact that he's still calling you those names.

"Fine," you lie, turning away so he can't see your face. "Just tired." 

"We can stop if you want," he offers. "Rest for a bit."

"No," you say, forcing a laugh. "I'll be fine. We need to keep going." 

"You sure?"

"Yes."

"Okay," he replies. "But tell me if you need to stop."

You nod and walk a little faster, leaving him behind. The sound of his footsteps behind you makes the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and it takes all your self-control not to turn around.

You need the distance.

The longer the two of you are together, the closer you feel to him, and the closer you feel to him, the harder it will be to say goodbye. And if the way he looks at you, the softness in his voice when he speaks, the gentle brush of his hand against yours is anything to go by, Wrecker isn't planning on leaving your side anytime soon.

The thought makes your heart swell, but you push it down, ignoring the longing it brings. You can't get attached. You can't let him get attached. It's not fair to either of you.

Wrecker's hand finds your shoulder, stopping you in your tracks. His grip is firm, but not painful, and his fingers gently squeeze, pulling you back a step.

"Cyar'ika, slow down," he murmurs. "Don't go runnin' off."

"Sorry," you mutter, and his thumb runs over your shoulder.

"S'okay. Just be careful."

He doesn't release you, and his grip stays on your shoulder, his thumb running gently over the fabric of your robes. You should pull away, should shrug his hand off, but his touch is comforting, and you can't help but lean into it.

"I will."

You don't move, and his fingers stroke your shoulder, the motion slow and rhythmic.

"What's wrong?" he asks, his voice barely a whisper.

"Nothing."

"Don't give me that," he says. "There's something bothering you. I can tell."

"It's nothing, Wrecker," you say, and this time, your words are firm. His grip on your shoulder tightens, not painfully, just enough to make his presence known. "Everything's fine."

"You can talk to me, y'know," he says, and the gentleness in his voice makes your throat close up. "Whatever it is, I'm here for you."

You stare at him, torn between wanting to scream and wanting to cry. Instead, you take a deep breath and let it out slowly. You can't do this right now. You can't handle his concern, his kindness, his affection.

"I said I'm fine," you say, your voice tight. "Just drop it, Wrecker." 

He stares at you for a moment, then his hand slips from your shoulder and falls to his side. 

"Okay," he says flatly. "I'm sorry."

You want to reach out and grab him, pull him back and apologize, but you can't. You can't even bring yourself to say anything, to explain yourself. You just watch him as he walks away, and the distance between you feels like a chasm. He's only a few steps away, but it might as well be miles.

You stand there, frozen, for what feels like an eternity, before finally you turn and start walking again. The silence is unbearable, but there's nothing you can do. You're trapped, with nowhere to go, and the man you care about most is walking away from you. It's a helpless, hopeless feeling, and you can't shake it. But you have to keep moving, so you do.

At some point, Hunter checks in and lets you know they're close to finding the T-1, but the knowledge does little to ease the pain in your chest. You keep walking, pushing yourself as fast as you can, but it doesn't seem to make a difference. The darkness, the silence, and the weight of your emotions seem to swallow you whole.

Wrecker doesn't seem to be faring much better. He keeps casting glances your way, and his posture is tense, his steps heavy. You know he wants to talk to you, but the words won't come. So you both suffer in silence, each step feeling like a betrayal, and the air is thick with things left unsaid.

When the two of you finally reach the end of the tunnel, the sun has started to set, casting the world outside in shades of orange and gold. The entrance opens into a field, the long grass swaying in the wind, and the sky is a vibrant shade of purple. It's a welcome relief from the stifling confines of the tunnel, and the sight of the sky is enough to make your heart ache.

I never want to be underground again, you think, and you take a deep breath, relishing the taste of the air. Beside you, Wrecker does the same, ripping off his helmet and sucking in a deep lungful of air.

"Fresh air," he groans. "I love fresh air."

"Me too," you murmur.

His head turns, and he smiles. "Glad we're outta there, cyar'ika?"

The affectionate word is enough to ruin the mood, and you glance away. "Yes. Glad."

"Good," he replies. His voice is soft, and when you look up, he's staring at you, his eyes searching your face. You want to look away, to avoid his gaze, but his eyes are like a magnet, drawing you in.

"Wrecker—"

"There you are!"

The sound of Hunter's voice startles you, and you tear your gaze away from Wrecker's to find the rest of the squad running towards you. Tech has his datapad in his hand, and his eyes are bright with triumph.

"I have good news," he says. "The tactical droid is—"

"Dead," Crosshair interrupts, and he tosses something at you. You reach up and catch the object, and the metal is still warm from Crosshair's grip. It's the head of a tactical droid, its expression fixed in a permanent nonplussed grimace, the red light behind its eyes extinguished.

"How...?"

"Hunter ripped it apart," Echo explains.

"I didn't like the way it was talking," Hunter mutters, and his shoulders shift uncomfortably.

"So, that's it, then?" Wrecker asks.

"Yep," Echo says. "Mission's done."

"Then let's go home," you sigh.

The men cheer, and the squad gathers around, jostling each other playfully. You smile at the display, and the weight on your chest starts to lift. You're free, the mission's over, and everything is going to go back to normal. It's a relief, and yet...

Your gaze wanders, and your eyes find Wrecker, and your chest aches. His expression is bright, a grin splitting his face, but his eyes are dark, and his smile doesn't reach them. Your hand tightens around the droid's head, and the guilt is almost unbearable.

It's better this way. You remind yourself. Safer. For both of us.

You can't risk the Council discovering what's been going on. If they ever found out, the repercussions would be disastrous. The thought of the men being punished for something that's your fault makes your stomach turn, and the idea of losing them, of never seeing Wrecker again...it's too much.

So you put on a smile and try not to think about the future, try not to think about what's waiting for you, the distance that will grow between you, the way you'll feel when the time comes to say goodbye.

The six of you pile into the ship, and Tech takes the controls, lifting the ship off the ground and flying into the evening sky. The takeoff is bumpy, and the ship groans under the strain, but eventually, you're in the air.

All you want to do is hide in your bunk, but there's a debrief to be done. Hunter is giving his report, and you're trying to pay attention, but all you can think about is the look on Wrecker's face.

You can't get it out of your head, and it's starting to drive you crazy. He was so happy when you got out of the tunnel, and now he looks like he's in pain, and you're the cause. You hate yourself for it, but the fear is still there, lingering, a constant reminder of the dangers that await you, and it's enough to make you stay away.

"We made it out with a few scrapes, but nothing too bad," Hunter finishes. He turns his head, looking between you and Wrecker. "What about the two of you?"

You open your mouth to answer, but the words die on your tongue, and the silence grows. All eyes are on you, and the longer you wait, the more concerned the men become. You look at Wrecker, hoping he'll say something, but he doesn't. He's staring at the floor, his shoulders tense.

"Uh, we're fine," you reply, and the words feel like glass. "No injuries. We're...we're good."

Wrecker scoffs and pushes himself out of his seat, stalking out of the cockpit. You watch him leave, a knot forming in your throat.

"That's odd," Tech murmurs, his eyes following Wrecker.

"Yeah," Hunter mutters. He shakes his head and sighs, then follows Wrecker, leaving you alone with the others

Crosshair raises an eyebrow and turns to look at you, his sharp eyes scanning your face. "Well?"

"What?"

"You really expect us to believe that?" he asks, his tone mocking. "You're a terrible liar, General."

You glance between him and Echo, and both of them are staring at you, their expressions unreadable. You swallow hard and force a laugh, shaking your head.

"There's nothing to tell."

"If there was nothing to tell, Wrecker wouldn't be sulking," Echo points out.

"And you wouldn't be sitting here looking like you're about to throw up," Crosshair adds.

"I am not," you argue.

"Oh, please," Crosshair snorts. "It's written all over your face."

"It's pretty obvious," Echo says, his voice gentler than Crosshair's. "What's wrong?"

You shake your head and rise to your feet. "Nothing."

"We're not gonna leave this alone," Crosshair calls after you.

"We're worried about you," Echo adds.

"Fine," you say, trying not to sound as defeated as you feel. "Worry. It doesn't matter. We'll be on Coruscant soon, and then I won't be your problem anymore."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Echo asks, his voice sharp, but you ignore him and keep walking. You can hear them arguing, their voices rising, and the words they're throwing at each other make your stomach churn. You keep your head down and keep walking, but before you can reach the bunks, you see Hunter and Wrecker. They're standing in the middle of the hallway, their backs to you, and Hunter's hand is on Wrecker's shoulder.

"—just give her some space," Hunter is saying.

"But she's—"

"She's fine," Hunter cuts in. "She just needs some time to herself. You've been a little clingy, and she needs a break."

Wrecker's shoulders stiffen, and the hurt in his voice is palpable. "Is that what she told you?"

"Well, no," Hunter says slowly. "But—"

"Then how do you know?" Wrecker demands, pulling away. "How do you know that's what she wants? How do you know she doesn't..." He trails off, his voice thick, and he turns, and his eyes land on you. The two of you stare at each other, the space between you charged with emotion, and when he speaks again, his words are quiet, and heartbreaking. "...want me?"

"She's a Jedi," Hunter says softly. "They don't...feel those kinds of things."

Wrecker stares at you, his expression open, the longing on his face so plain, so obvious, that your knees feel weak. You can't take it anymore. You turn away, ducking into the refresher and locking the door behind you

The room is silent, the air still. There's no sound but the pounding of your heart, the blood roaring in your ears. You lean against the door and slide to the floor, wrapping your arms around your knees.

You know what you have to do, but the idea is terrifying, the thought of saying goodbye to Wrecker too painful to bear. But he's hurting, and it's because of you. You can't put him through that, not any longer. He deserves better. He deserves someone who can be with him, can give him the affection he deserves, not a cowardly Jedi who can't handle the consequences of her actions.

The realization hurts more than you thought it would, but there's nothing you can do. You've known all along that this would have to end someday, and that someday has come.

The only thing you can do is let him go.

The next day passes in a blur, and the tension is thick in the air. Wrecker doesn't say a word, doesn't look at you, doesn't acknowledge your presence, and you're grateful for it. You can't bring yourself to look at him, and the others are quick to pick up on the change. They cast furtive glances at each other, their concern growing, and their efforts to cheer you up only make the situation worse. You'd much rather they focus their attentions on Wrecker, so you avoid all of them as best you can. 

It's easier this way. Safer. Less painful. 

And maybe, if you keep telling yourself that, you'll start to believe it.

Once you land on Kashyyyk to refuel, the five of them disappear into the village, leaving you alone to meditate. It's the one thing that can help you clear your mind, and you welcome the chance to relax.

The ship is silent, the hum of the engine the only noise, and the quiet helps soothe the ache in your chest. You close your eyes and settle onto the floor, clearing your mind and reaching out with the Force.

When you were a youngling, you were told that the Force was your ally, and you believed it. Now, you know better. The Force doesn't take sides. It simply is. It exists in everything, every living thing, and sometimes, when you meditate, you can feel it. It's a gentle brush against your senses, like a soft caress, and you let yourself sink into the feeling, allowing it to envelop you, and for a moment, everything seems to fade away.

That's why, when you hear the sound of someone approaching, you're startled, and your eyes fly open. You frown, remembering Hunter saying he'd comm you when the others were headed back. It's more than likely Tech sneaking away from the group to tinker with the ship, and so you stand, turning towards the sound.

What you see instead, however, makes your blood run cold. 

Wrecker is standing at the top of the ramp, his form silhouetted by the light outside, his eyes burning into you. You're frozen in place, unable to move, unable to think. All you can do is stare at him, trying to make sense of the expression on his face, but all you can see is anger, and your heart sinks.

"What's going on?" he asks. His voice is low, but there's an edge to it, and his shoulders are stiff.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm talking about the way you've been acting," he says, stepping further into the ship. "Ever since we left Akiva, you've been avoiding me. Why?"

"I haven't been avoiding you," you lie, turning away from him.

"Like kriff, you haven't!" he exclaims, and you flinch, the anger in his voice catching you off guard. "I've tried to talk to you, and you walk away! You won't even look at me!"

"That's not true," you argue. "I'm always—"

"Yeah, it is," he snaps. "You think I don't notice, but I do. You're always running away, avoiding me. Why? Just tell me why. Talk to me. Please."

"Wrecker..."

"Don't say my name like that," he pleads, his voice cracking. "Don't push me away. Please, cyar'ika, I need to know what's going on."

The endearment sends a jolt through your system, and you squeeze your eyes shut, trying not to cry. You've spent the past twenty-four hours doing nothing but thinking about this, trying to steel yourself for what's to come, and yet here he is, begging for answers, and you're not ready. You can't bring yourself to say the words, can't bring yourself to push him away, but if you don't, it will only get harder.

"Please," he whispers. "What did I do? How did I hurt you?"

You can't look at him, but you can't ignore him, either. The last thing you want is for him to think any of this is his fault, and so you force yourself to turn, your eyes meeting his, and your resolve breaks.

"You didn't," you murmur. "It's not your fault, I promise."

"Then tell me what's wrong," he pleads, and his voice is soft, and the desperation in it is enough to break your heart. "Tell me what I can do to fix this."

Wrecker reaches out and takes a step towards you, his hand outstretched, but the gesture is hesitant, almost as if he's afraid to touch you. When you don't move away, he steps closer, his fingers brushing the hem of your sleeve. His gaze is intense, his eyes searching yours, and the ache in his voice is enough to make you want to scream.

"I'm not good at this," he admits. "This...talking stuff. I never know what to say, and I'm sorry. If I made you uncomfortable, or did somethin' wrong, I'm sorry."

"Wrecker..."

"I just want to make things right," he whispers, and his fingers curl around your sleeve. "Just tell me how, and I'll do it. I'll fix it."

He's so earnest, so sincere, and the guilt is crushing. You can't lie to him, not anymore. Not when he's looking at you like this.

"It's not that simple," you say, and the words feel like lead in your mouth.

"Why not?" he asks, his voice raw.

"Because," you say, the words tumbling out before you can stop them. "Because I can't do this anymore, Wrecker. I can't..." You trail off, the words dying on your tongue. You can't bring yourself to say them, can't bring yourself to end things like this. But it's too late. He knows.

He drops his hand, and the look of pain on his face is almost enough to break your heart.

"Do what?" he asks, his voice shaking.

"This," you say, gesturing between the two of you. "Whatever this is. I can't keep pretending that I don't know what you mean when you call me those names. I can't keep acting like it's nothing, because it's not." 

Wrecker stumbles back a step, eyes wide.

"You knew?" he asks, and his voice is barely audible. "This whole time...?"

"Of course I knew," you say, trying to keep the frustration out of your voice. "You think I could have missed it?" You try to laugh, but it comes out as a choked sob. "You're not exactly subtle, Wrecker."

"Oh," he says, and the single word holds a world of hurt. He turns away from you, his hands curling into fists at his sides, and the tension in the air is palpable. A heavy silence settles in, and when he speaks again, his voice is a hoarse whisper.

"Why didn't you say something?" he asks. "Why didn't you tell me to stop?"

"I couldn't," you say, swallowing the lump in your throat. "I...I liked it too much."

"What?" Wrecker turns, his head snapping around to face you, and his expression is torn between hope and horror.

"You heard me," you say, fighting to keep your voice steady. You turn away, but his hand finds your chin, gently tilting your face back to his. The heat of his palm burns into your skin, his touch so gentle, and your heart leaps into your throat.

"Then why are you doing this?" he asks, and the words are barely audible. "If you like it, why are you trying to push me away?"

You close your eyes, trying to gather your thoughts. It's a good question, and one you're not sure you can answer.

"Because," you start, and then trail off. When you open your eyes, his face is inches from yours, and the pain in his eyes is overwhelming. "Because I'm not meant for this. For us." You motion between the two of you. "I have a duty. A responsibility. I can't...I can't give you what you want. What you deserve."

"But I don't want anyone else,” Wrecker says softly, his thumb brushing your cheek. "I just want you."

The words hit you like a punch to the gut, and you close your eyes, trying not to cry. You can feel the warmth of his body, the weight of his hand, the scent of him surrounding you. You want to pull away, to run and hide, but the way his hands cradle your face, the gentleness in his touch, makes it impossible.

"You don't mean that," you whisper, the words like poison. "You can't. I'm a Jedi. You know what that means. You know what my life is. I can't give you anything, Wrecker. I can't even be there for you. I can't..."

"Stop," he whispers. 

His hands drop, moving to your shoulders, and he turns you, pulling you closer. You let him, and his arms wrap around you, his forehead resting against yours. The touch is warm and gentle, and his eyes are soft, full of pain and love. 

He's never been anything but gentle with you, even when he didn't have to be. Even when the mission demanded he take risks, put his life on the line, he was always careful with you. Always protective. Always gentle. And now, here, when the mission is over, the danger gone, he's still treating you like something precious, something to be treasured.

It's too much.

"Don't say that," he murmurs, his voice low and rough. "You don't get to tell me how I feel. You can't decide for me, cyar'ika. I'm not gonna change my mind. I'm not gonna stop caring about you. So just...just stop. Okay?"

Your hands find his, curling around his wrists. His pulse is pounding under your fingertips, and his chest is rising and falling with each breath, the beat of his heart matching the rhythm of yours. It would be so easy, so tempting, to let yourself give in. To give him the answer he wants. To give him the one thing you've wanted to give him for so long.

But you can't. You can't let him sacrifice his future, his happiness, for you. It's too much. Too selfish.

"Wrecker, please," you say, squeezing his wrists. "Don't make this harder than it has to be."

"Then don't do this," he whispers. "Don't walk away from me. Please." His voice breaks, and his fingers dig into your shoulders. "Just...just give me a chance."

You want to scream. You want to cry. You want to hit him, to shove him away, but you can't. All you can do is stare up at him, his face inches from yours, his eyes begging. It would be so easy, and yet, impossibly difficult. If you do this, if you give in, it's not just your life on the line, but his. If you give him what he wants, if you allow him to care for you, it will only lead to more heartbreak. More pain.

And yet...

You can't bring yourself to pull away, can't bring yourself to deny him. And, if you're honest with yourself, you don't want to. You've wanted this for so long, wanted him, and now that the moment has finally come, the opportunity has presented itself, you can't let it go.

"I can't," you whisper, your voice shaking.

"Why not?"

"Because I'm scared," you confess. You reach out and cup his cheek, running your thumb over the scarred tissue beneath his eye, and his expression softens. "I'm not supposed to feel like this. I'm not supposed to...to love you." The words come out choked, and the tears in your eyes blur your vision. "It's wrong. It's forbidden. It's...it's..."

"It's what?" he asks, his voice rough with emotion. "It's amazing? It's the best feeling in the galaxy?"

"Yes," you whisper, and the tears spill over. "But I can't do this. I can't...I can't let you sacrifice yourself for me."

"You think that's what I'm doing?" Wrecker asks. His hand slips from your shoulder, his fingers stroking your cheek, catching a tear as it falls. "Cyar'ika, I'd sacrifice myself for you a hundred times over. You think I care about what they'd say? They can go kriff themselves. I'd fight every single member of the Council for you, if I had to. But I don't need to. 'Cause they can't tell me what to do, and neither can you."

"You say that now," you mutter. "But—"

"I'll say it every day," he cuts in. "Every single day until you believe me. I don't care about them. I don't care about the rules. I just want you."

"Wrecker, stop," you whisper, but he shakes his head, his hands cupping your face, his thumbs brushing your cheeks.

"I know you're scared. I know you're worried about what's going to happen. But we don't have to think about that. We can just be together. Just us. Nobody has to know. We can figure this out. Together. But you gotta let me in."

You stare at him, stunned by the strength and certainty in his words. He's right. You are scared. You're terrified. And not just of what the Council will do, or what the consequences might be. 

You're afraid of him, of the power he holds over you, the way you feel about him. But standing here, with his hands on your face, his eyes searching yours, it's enough to make you reconsider. Enough to make you question everything. And so you swallow your fears, and you say the words.

"I love you, Wrecker."

His lips part, and his eyes widen, and the sound that comes out of his mouth is halfway between a laugh and a sob.

"You mean that?" he asks, his voice tight with emotion.

"Yes," you say, and the word is like a weight lifting off your shoulders. "I do. I love you."

His arms slip around your waist, and he pulls you into him, pressing his forehead against yours, his breath warm on your face. He doesn't say anything, just stares down at you, his gaze burning, and the silence stretches on, charged with anticipation. And then, finally, he speaks.

"I love you too, cyar'ika," he says, his voice trembling. "More than you know."

Your heart feels like it's going to burst. You pull him close, burying your face in his chest, and his arms wrap around you, holding you tight. It's an overwhelming feeling, this affection, this love, but you can't deny it. Not anymore. And as you stand there, his body wrapped around yours, his hands running through your hair, you know that he's right.

"Don't let go," you whisper, your voice muffled by his armor. "Please, don't ever let me go."

"I won't," he says, his voice a rumble in his chest. "I got you, an'edee. Always."

The words send a jolt of warmth through your body, and you melt into him, allowing yourself to be swept away by the feeling. It's like coming home, the warmth and comfort washing over you, and the tension melts away, leaving only relief in its wake. 

You're not sure how long you stay there, wrapped up in each other, but when he finally pulls away, you're stunned by the look in his eyes. No one has ever looked at you like that. No one has ever seen you like he does.

"Better?" he asks, his voice gentle.

"Yes," you say, smiling up at him. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me," he says. "You don't gotta thank me. Just keep lookin' at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Like you love me," he murmurs.

"Oh," you reply, blushing. "Well, then, I suppose I should do my best. It wouldn't do for me to fail in that regard."

He chuckles, his hands sliding up your sides. "No, it wouldn't."

You shiver at his touch, the heat of his hands sinking into your skin. His palms are rough and calloused, and his fingers are gentle, tracing the curve of your waist. Your eyes meet, and his smile is so wide, so warm, that you can't help but return it.

"So," he says, his hands drifting lower. "Where does this leave us?"

"Us?"

"Yeah. You know, our relationship," he says. "Are we...together? Or do I still gotta keep pretendin' that you're just a friend?"

You sigh, a smile tugging at your lips. "Together, Wrecker. We're together."

"Good," he grins, his eyes bright. "'Cause I wasn't sure how much longer I could take it. Having you around, knowing how I felt, not being able to do anything about it."

"That's why I was avoiding you," you admit. "I knew if I had to spend much more time with you, I was going to break. I was already having trouble controlling my feelings. If we'd had another mission, I don't think I would have made it. I was so close to telling you how I felt."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Kriff, cyar'ika," he groans, his grip on your waist tightening. "I wish you would've said something sooner. Woulda made things a lot easier."

"I'm sorry," you murmur.

"Don't apologize," he says, his voice husky. "You're worth the wait."

Your breath catches in your throat, and his eyes flick to yours, and his grin turns mischievous.

"What is it, mesh'la?" he asks, his fingers digging into your hips. "Tell me."

"I, um..." You clear your throat, trying to ignore the way his voice makes your insides turn to mush. "It's just that...when you call me those names, it, uh, does things to me."

"Good things?" he asks, leaning in.

"Yes."

"You want me to keep saying them, then?"

"Yes."

"Well, I can do that," he murmurs. His breath is warm on your skin, his voice low and teasing. "And I can do a lot more, too. If you want me to."

You stare up at him, trying to ignore the butterflies in your stomach, trying not to let your desire show on your face. You've never done anything like this, never even considered doing something like this. And yet, the idea of him touching you, kissing you, fills you with anticipation.

"I'd like that," you manage, your voice hoarse.

"You sure?"

"Yes."

He nods, and he leans down, his lips ghosting over yours. His eyes search your face, and he waits, and when you nod, he presses his lips to yours.

It's a slow, soft kiss, the barest brush of skin on skin. But the contact sends a thrill through your body, and you can't help but press closer, wanting more. Your hands move to the back of his neck, pushing yourself onto the tips of your toes, and he obliges, pulling you in.

His lips are warm, his tongue slick and hot as it traces the seam of your mouth. You open for him, letting him deepen the kiss, and his palm slides up your back, cradling your head. His thumb strokes your cheek, and the gentleness of the gesture sends a rush of warmth through your veins.

When the two of you finally break apart, your lungs are aching, and his breath is ragged. He leans his forehead against yours, his fingers tracing lazy circles on the back of your neck.

"Kriff, cyar'ika," he whispers, and the name sends a thrill through you. You can hear the longing, the need, in his voice, and it's enough to make your knees weak. "Do you have any idea how long I've waited for this?"

"Tell me," you say, your voice shaking.

"Too long," he murmurs. "Far too long."

You lean back, looking up at him. The adoration in his eyes takes your breath away, and you pull him down, kissing him again. This time, the kiss is deeper, more intense, and you can't hold back a moan as his tongue slips past your lips.

The noise seems to ignite something in him, because the next thing you know, his arms are around you, lifting you up with ease. You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him in, and his hands roam over your back, sliding down to cup your ass. He breaks the kiss, his lips moving to your neck, and the heat of his mouth, the scrape of his teeth, makes you gasp.

Wrecker sets you down on the edge of your bunk, and the height difference is suddenly very apparent. You're not used to being on eye level with him, but now, with your legs spread, his body between them, it's impossible not to notice. His gaze rakes over you, taking in every detail, and the hunger in his eyes sends a jolt of excitement through your body.

"You're so beautiful," he murmurs, his fingers tracing the line of your jaw. He sounds awed, like he can't believe his luck, and the compliment makes your heart flutter. "So kriffing beautiful, cyar'ika." 

You lean into his touch, and his fingers brush against your lips, the callouses of his hands rough against your skin. You kiss his fingertips, and the heat in his gaze makes you blush.

"Not as beautiful as you," you murmur. He shakes his head with a wide grin, his eyes crinkling at the corners.

"No one's as beautiful as you," Wrecker says, his hand finding yours. His fingers lace with yours, and he raises your hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to the back of your knuckles. His touch is gentle, and the tenderness of the gesture makes your heart clench. "I could look at you forever. Never get tired of it."

The heat on your cheeks is unbearable, and you're not sure how to respond. Words can't capture the emotions coursing through you, and so you lean in, your lips meeting his in a searing kiss. He groans against your mouth, his hand finding the small of your back and pulling you flush against him.

You wrap your legs around him, the need to be closer, to feel his body pressed against yours, overwhelming. He seems to understand, his fingers tangling in your hair, his teeth nipping at your lip.

"I'm gonna take such good care of you, cyar'ika," he promises, his voice rough with emotion. "Promise."

"You already have," you whisper. "Just having you here is more than I deserve."

"Don't talk like that," he mutters. His hand slides up, cupping the back of your head, and he kisses the corner of your mouth. He tilts your face up to meet his, and the intensity of his gaze is almost overwhelming. "I've never wanted anyone the way I want you. I'm not gonna give that up. You're mine, and I'm not lettin' go."

The words are a jolt to your system, the possessiveness of his tone making you tremble. He's always been protective of you, but this is different. This is more than just a desire to keep you safe. This is something else entirely. You can't find the words to respond, and so you nod, swallowing the lump in your throat and praying the tears in your eyes don't spill over.

"Wrecker," you whisper. "I..."

"I love you," he murmurs, his nose brushing against yours. "So much."

The words are a balm on your aching heart, and the tears finally fall. Wrecker leans in and kisses them away, his lips soft and gentle against your cheeks. The tenderness, the closeness, it's too much to bear, and the emotions welling up inside you are overwhelming. You wrap your arms around him, burying your face in his chest, and he holds you tight, his hand rubbing soothing circles on your back.

"I got you," he whispers. "It's okay. You're okay."

"I'm sorry," you murmur. "I don't know why I'm crying."

"I do," he replies. He cups your chin, tilting your face up to meet his. His eyes are soft, and his lips curl into a gentle smile. "You've been through a lot, and you're tired. You're allowed to cry."

You nod, wiping the tears from your face. He's right. The past few days have been exhausting, emotionally and physically. Between the mission, the tension between the two of you, the anxiety and uncertainty, it's a miracle you're not falling apart.

"Hey," he murmurs. "Stop thinking so hard. It's okay."

"I'm not supposed to let my emotions get the best of me," you murmur.

"That's some banthashit, an'edee," he says, and his voice is teasing, but there's a hint of steel in it. "You're human. You're allowed to have emotions."

"I suppose," you reply, unable to keep the smile off your face.

"Good," he says, and his thumb strokes your cheek. "We'll make this work. We'll find a way."

"Wrecker," you sigh.

"Shh," he cuts in. "None of that. We're together, right?"

"Right."

"Then trust me. I'm not gonna let anything happen to you," he promises. "I'll keep you safe."

"I know," you whisper, closing your eyes.

"We'll figure it out," Wrecker says. "It might be hard, but we'll find a way. We always do."

He leans in and kisses you again, his lips soft and warm. You kiss him back, allowing yourself to give in, to let go of the fear and worry, to let yourself be swept away by the feeling. He's right. It will be difficult, but it's worth it.

This is where you belong, in his arms, and no matter what the future holds, no matter what the Order says, no matter the consequences, you know you'll always have him. And that's more than you could have ever hoped for.

Taglist: @baddest-batchers @covert1ntrovert @stellarbit @bruh-myguy-what @qvnthesia

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[sambadeamigosgato]

Can he do this to me...please...

[doingitforbokuto]

Osamu wouldn't call himself a lazy person. He gets up every day at the crack of dawn to run his own business, he checks all of his ingredients' quality before using them, he makes sure all his customers are happy with their food. He makes small talk with his regulars, he works until the last person has left the restaurant. For years he has put all of his energy into accomplishing his dream, so yeah, he wouldn't say he is lazy.

But when he comes home from a day of hard, taxing work, all he wants to do is lay back and enjoy himself. And you make sure that he does.

He's laid back on the bed right now, his tired legs spread out in front of him. Your hand is pawing at his big thighs as you try to ease yourself down onto his cock without overstimulating yourself. You had insisted on pampering him when he came home, swearing that he deserves it after working so hard. And now, with his back resting on the pillows you had propped up for him on the bed and with his eyes resting on your perfect ass, he had no complaints at all.

"Mmh, sweetheart.."

If you want him to lay back and relax, then that's exactly what he is going to do. He leans back, one arm slung over the bedrest. The other one rests on your shoulder while you take the last couple of inches of his cock and lean back into his touch.

"Ah fuck - 'Samu!"

Lazily, he fucks his hips up into you right after you sunk down onto him. His hand runs down your back and onto your waist. He is enjoying this a bit too much.

"Ya sound pretty, sweetheart," he murmurs as he smooths his palm over your asscheek. God, you look so good like this. "Gonna spoil me with s'more, pretty girl?"

You can feel tears prickle at the corner of your eyes at the praise, the sensation of his cock sitting snugly against your tender cervix mixing with the sound of his praise will always be overwhelming to you.

"W-whatever you want, 'Samu." You turn your head to look at him over your shoulder. "I'll do whatever you want."

It's clear how much he is enjoying the show you are putting on for him: the way you wiggle your hips, show off your ass, stretch your pretty back. His grin is spreading all over his face as he gets comfortable.

"Fuck yourself on ma cock, will ya?"

[greenfoxeyedbrunette]

"You wanna cum? You wanna cum, baby?"  your partner says with a voice crack as he pumps his thick throbbing cock up into you at a consistent pace. Your back facing him, you nod and whisper "please..." Getting overwhelmed with him hitting the right spot, you repeat louder than a whisper "pleaasse..." In response, your partner quickly carries both of your legs up by the back of your knees. Splitting your wet pussy rapidly. His d*ck's so hard and feels so good. "Fuck! Too much!.." you shudder as you reach your high. "Nnnh.." You whimper as your lover slides his tongue in your mouth. Slowly and deeply kissing you, he carefully lowers your legs to caress your body and soothe you.

jean kirstein, daichi sawamura, kuroo tetsurou, muriel, kunigami rensuke, tokimitsu aoshi, wakatoshi ushijima, miya osamu

[wildflowerspollinator]

Between Confusion and Clarity

I published a new chapter of my fanfic. It’s smutty but sweet, and it could also work as a standalone piece. The whole story is fluff and smut with a bit of angst.

Chapter 18

Colin confidently steps down from the carriage, the sounds of bustling London streets muffled by the cool night air. Reaching into his coat pocket, he carefully withdraws a small, unlit candle. The coachman adjusts the carriage lantern.

"A candle in your pocket? I thought you were just happy to see me?" Penelope teases. 

Leaning in close, Colin grins. "Upon closer inspection, my dear, you'll find that I am very happy indeed."

Stepping away from Penelope momentarily, he touches the wick of his candle to the carriage light. The flame catches quickly, casting a soft glow that illuminates his face. Satisfied, he turns to Penelope and offers her his arm with a warm smile. "Shall we?" he asks, the flickering candle casting light on the stairs leading to the townhouse.

Penelope takes his arm, her eyes reflecting the light as she gazes at him. "Thank you, Colin," she replies.

As they step inside, the interior is cloaked in darkness, save for Colin's candle's soft, solitary glow. He turns to Penelope, his expression warm and reassuring. "Stay close; it won't take long to light the place up."

Guiding her inside, he moves to the nearest sconce on the wall, gently tipping the candle to light a larger one in the wall-mounted holder. The flame catches, spreading a warm light across the entryway. Colin moves quickly, repeating the process with a few more sconces and a lantern, casting a welcoming glow throughout the room.

Penelope admires him and appreciates how he cares for her comfort, even in the smallest gestures. "There," he says with a satisfied smile. It's much better."

She nods, her smile widening as she takes in the sight of the townhouse's entryway. "Much better indeed," she agrees.

Colin sets the now mostly melted candle on a nearby table, its purpose served. Extending his hand to Penelope, his expression softens. "Shall we find somewhere more comfortable?"

"We could," she replies, pressing him against the wall and unbuttoning the first two buttons of his vest. "Give me a tour."

"A tour, you say?" His voice drops, "I think I can manage that."

"I should hope so," she says, her fingers lingering on his vest before slowly stepping back, giving him just enough space to move.

Taking her hand, Colin threads his fingers through hers and leads her down the hallway. "This is the drawing-room," he says softly, pride evident in his voice. "I thought it would be a good place for us to entertain guests or just relax with a good book. I've already moved some of my books and added a few decorative trinkets as placeholders, but we can work on building the collection together."

Penelope's eyes scan the room, taking in the cozy furniture arrangement and thoughtful touches. "It's perfect, Colin," she says sincerely, her voice filled with admiration. "I love it."

He turns to her, a tender expression on his face. "And I love you."

"Penelope," he begins, her name a question on his lips as if searching for the right words. "Before I lead you into every room, know it's a promise."

"A promise?" she echoes.

He nods. "A promise that this is our home."

Tears well up in her eyes. "Colin…"

He takes a deep breath, his voice softening even more. "Marry me, Penelope. I want to spend my life discovering you slowly, day by day. I want to learn every story and cherish every moment with you. I want every part of you. The bold, the shy, the playful, and the serious. I want it all, and I want us to fill this home with memories of a well-lived and well-loved life."

"Yes, Colin," she says, a radiant smile breaking through her tears. "Yes, I will marry you."

He leans down, capturing her lips in a passionate kiss. When they finally pull apart, his eyes sparkle with joy. "Well, good," he says with a grin. "Then the tour can commence."

Retaking her hand, he leads her further into the townhouse. "We'll send an invitation to your house in a couple of days' time. Once Anthony and Kate have settled in, we'll have your mother over to decide on the wedding details. I told Anthony a dowry wasn't necessary—between my funds and, well…" He lowers his voice conspiratorially, "And he doesn't know about your Lady Whistledown earnings, but I think we'll have more than enough."

Penelope squeezes his hand, "So, Anthony is back?"

"Yes, that's why I was finally able to ask. But I've been working on getting everything set in motion since I told your mother I intended to court you," Colin explains, his eyes shining with pride.

"Hence the home," Penelope says, her voice soft with understanding.

"But now that it will be official, you must act somewhat surprised when you see the home again in full light when you return with Rae to settle on everything you'll need to run the household."

"Colin!" she exclaims, her voice catching with laughter and tears.

"Yes?" he asks, turning to her slightly worriedly. “Is it… is it not…”

"No!" Penelope quickly interrupts, shaking her head. "It's not that. I've always wanted you."

He steps closer, his thumb brushing away a tear that escapes down her cheek. "You have me, Pen," he says gently. "You've got me forever."

"I know," she whispers, her voice trembling. "But I wanted you and this for so long. And to discover that you've been putting it in motion, making our future turnkey ready, it's… it's…"

He looks at her expectantly, his heart thudding in his chest. "Yes?"

"It's the most attractive thing you could ever do," she finishes.

A slow, satisfied smile spreads across Colin's face. "I'm glad you think so," he says. He pulls her into his arms again, holding her tightly against him.

"Because there's nothing I want more than to make you happy. To build this life with you."

She hesitates for a moment, then whispers, "I…"

"Yes?" he prompts, his eyes searching hers.

"I intend to ravage you, Mr. Bridgerton."

His eyebrows lift in surprise and delight. "Oh? And where might you have in mind for such an endeavor?"

"Upstairs?" she suggests.

Without hesitation, Colin takes her hand, his grip firm and reassuring.

"Upstairs it is," he replies, reaching for the lantern. Its soft light flickers in the dim hallway and leads her toward the staircase. "I think you're going to love what I have in store for you," he proclaims as they ascend, their steps quick and eager.

"Wait," Penelope asks, her voice soft but insistent.

Colin pauses, looking down at her with a curious expression. "You don't want to go upstairs?" 

She steps ahead of him, turning to face him on the stairwell, "It's not that," she declares, smiling. "I just never had the chance to kiss you on a stairwell... to kiss you at your level."

Colin pauses, his eyes flicking between her and the steps. His heart quickens at her boldness, "Then, by all means, Penelope," he says with anticipation as he leans toward her, tilting his head ever so slightly. "Kiss me."

Her smile deepens, and without hesitation, she leans in, her hands finding their way to the collar of his jacket as she pulls him closer.  She brushes her lips against his, slow and teasing at first, savoring the novelty of being on equal footing.

Colin breaks away momentarily, breathless, his forehead resting against hers. "You know," he begins, "if I get you out of this dress and you sit in my lap like you did that night in the garden, we'll nearly be at the same level."

Penelope presses her hand gently to his cheek, her thumb tracing the line of his jaw. Her eyes lock onto his with a softness that holds him in place. "Okay," she whispers.

With that, Colin begins walking her backward, his steps slow and deliberate, guiding her up the stairs one step at a time. His mouth doesn't leave her skin as they ascend; his lower lip drags lazily up her neck as his lips find her earlobe, his teeth grazing it lightly before he sucks on it. She lets out a small, quiet gasp, her hand tightening its grip on his shoulder. His tongue flicks over her ear. 

He pulls back slightly, taking her hand in his. His thumb brushes soothing circles into her skin, a gentle, grounding touch as they move down the hallway toward the main bedroom.

Once inside, Colin releases her hand momentarily and moves the lantern by the bedside. He lifts it carefully, using the flame to light a few candles scattered around the room, bathing them in a golden light.

As soon as Colin is done lighting the room, Penelope moves on him, fingers tugging swiftly at the buttons, so many buttons. Colin's gaze is intense, his chest rising and falling with shallow breaths as he watches her undress him. His hands twitch at his sides, yearning to touch her, to return the favor and undress her just as urgently—but Colin waits, allowing her to take control at this moment. He waits because he loves the way her fingers move with confidence, her brows furrow in concentration, and her lips part slightly in anticipation. The hunger in her face drives him wild with need.

"Like my own Greek statue," Penelope whispers in awe. Her eyes sweep over Colin, admiring every line of his body, and her hands sweep over his abs.

Colin's lips twitch as he steps closer, "You know," he begins, "the nice thing about not having staff around yet is that you don't have to whisper." He leans closer, "We can be as loud as we want."

Penelope's cheeks flush a soft pink, but she grins, straightening her posture. With exaggerated enthusiasm, she repeats, "My own Greek statue!"

Colin laughs, the sound rich and full, as his hands slip around her waist, "And my goddess!" he declares, his lips brushing against her forehead.

His laughter subsides, and with a new intensity in his eyes, his hands move to undress her. His fingers work with care. Her dress falls in a soft heap at her feet, leaving her standing before him, exposed and vulnerable but powerful in how she looks up at him.

Colin's eyes trace her form before his hands slide to her waist in one smooth motion; he bends slightly, scooping her up effortlessly as Penelope lets out a surprised gasp. As he lifts, Penelope instinctively wraps her legs around his hips. His arms move to cradle her under her thighs, holding her securely against his chest. She grasps his shoulders for balance, feeling the warmth of his body and the strength in his embrace. 

With a grin, he moves toward the ensuite door, nudging it open with his shoulder. "You know, we never completed the tour," he says.

Penelope laughs softly, her arms wrapped around his neck as she leans close. "Well, I'll have plenty to be surprised by in the light of day," she says, kissing his shoulder. 

Colin smiles as he steps inside the room. "I know we have the sitting room downstairs," he begins, his tone thoughtful, "but I thought a smaller, more private library would be nice. With a writing desk..."

Penelope listens, her fingers trailing through his hair. Colin pauses, and he gently lowers her onto the desk, her body settling against the smooth surface.

"Are you going to read me more excerpts from your journal?"

"Not now."

"No?" Penelope's fingers trail down Colin's chest as he sits in the desk chair, facing her. His hands move to her thighs. "I'm going to write the next chapter."

"Now?" she manages to ask.

"With my tongue," as he slowly spreads her legs. 

Penelope's eyes widen, "Oh," she gasps softly, her hands gripping the edge of the desk. "Do you plan on writing many chapters this way?"

Colin grins, his hands kneading her thighs as he moves in closer, his lips hovering just above her skin. "I'd like a reminder of this memory every time I sit at this desk," his voice a low, "to remind myself how best to use my talents, whether it's the stroke of a pen, the stroke of a finger, or..."

As his lips descend, Colin's tongue traces a slow, deliberate path; Penelope gasps again, her head tilting back as the intensity of his touch overwhelms her senses. Colin's hands continue along her sides, steady and firm as if savoring every inch of her.

Although a faint light poured in from the open door, it wasn't enough to reveal all the details of each other. Instead, their eyes remained veiled in shadow, amplifying the sensitivity of every other sense. Penelope's skin tingled as Colin's fingertips skimmed across it, the feel of his tongue, each touch electric in the darkness, making her hyper-aware of every movement and brazen by the darkness.

For Colin, the taste of her was intoxicating, her scent, her wetness dripping on him. The way Penelope didn't hold back, the moans spilling from her lips, drove him to the edge. Her voice filled the room, his name on her lips like a mantra. 

In the afterglow, Penelope moves from where she's perched on the edge of the desk, her bare feet softly padding against the wooden floor as she shifts onto Colin's lap. She nuzzles her face into the crook of his neck, and a gentle rock of her hips follows; Colin's hands instinctively grip her, his fingers splayed firmly over the curve of her ass, holding her securely in place.

"I want..." Penelope's voice is a breathy whisper, her lips brushing against his ear as she speaks.

Colin's head tilts back slightly, his eyes half-lidded as he looks at her, barely able to make out her face. "What is it that you want?" he asks, his voice rough with desire, his hands tightening their hold.

"The feel of you... on top," she murmurs, her voice dripping with want. As she says this, her hand moves between their bodies, fingers trailing lower until they brush against him. And then, taking some of her own wetness in her hand, slowly, deliberately, she takes the palm of her hand and rubs it against his tip.

Colin lets out a guttural moan, the sound deep and primal, his head falling back as his body reacts to her touch. His grip on her tightens, fingers digging into her skin with a barely controlled need. His chest rises and falls rapidly, his heart pounding against hers. "Penelope," he groans, his voice ragged, barely holding onto the last threads of restraint.

She leans in, pressing her lips to the pulse point at his neck, feeling it race under her kiss. Her body shifts again, her hips rocking slightly.

Colin's body responds immediately. His hands slide up her back, tracing the curve of her spine with a possessive touch. His breaths come in short, ragged bursts as he struggles to keep in control, her teasing touch unraveling him with each passing second. "Yes," he growls, his voice low and filled with heat. Let's do that."

Penelope shifts, her body slipping from his lap as he stands. Her fingers reach out to graze him one last time, but instead, he props her back up on top of the desk; he steps between her legs, his body moving forward as though drawn by a force he can't resist.

He enters her in one swift, fluid motion, making her gasp in surprise and pleasure. She arches her back, curving to meet him. "I said I want you on top," she breathes, the words half teasing, half commanding.

Colin's face twists into a smirk, his eyes filled with unrestrained hunger. "I need fuel for the walk over to the bed," he replies, his tone ragged and filled with a desperate need for control. 

With a low moan, he thrusts deeper, the sensation making them both shudder. Colin's hands grip her hips, pulling her closer; the desire to lose himself in her is overwhelming. He can still taste her as he licks his lips.

She could feel the strength in his arms, the steady beat of his heart against her palm when she rested her hand on his chest. The softness of his hair, the roughness of his stubble, the firm lines of his shoulders—everything.

"I dreamt about you last night, and it was incredible, but then I woke up, and you weren't there beside me," Colin admits like a confession. His face hovers near her chest, the warmth from her skin beckoning him closer.

"I dreamt about you last night and woke up dripping wet," Penelope replies, her voice a sultry whisper as she wraps her legs around him.  

Colin lets out a soft grunt, overwhelmed by the admission. His fingers tangle in her hair as he frees one hand from her hip, brushing back the damp strands clinging to her forehead.

"God, Pen," he gasps.

"Give it a tug," she instructs the words sending a thrill through him. He complies, gently tugging her hair, feeling the way it elicits a soft gasp from her lips.

"You're unbelievable… you feel–" he mutters. 

"How do I feel?" she asks, her mouth brushing against his throat, her fingers tracing paths through the hair on his chest. 

"Soft," as his grip on her hips tightens, "and moist," as he grinds against her, "and hot and…breathy," as his mouth lingers near hers.

Colin starts to pull out, but Penelope digs her heels into the back of his thighs, pushing against him. "No, don't stop."

"I thought you wanted me on top," he murmurs, his voice teasing. "To feel the weight of me on you…"

"I do, but—"

He thrusts back into her, cutting her off. "You want everything," he rasps, one hand pressing just above her pelvic bone with his palm. 

"I want everything," she whispers back, her voice catching on a breath.

He begins to move again, slow and deliberate, savoring every gasp and tremor from her body. His hand, still on her lower abdomen, feels every flutter and pulse beneath his touch, driving him to the edge.

"God, Pen," he murmurs, "You drive me mad."

Her nails dig into his back, urging him on,  "Then go mad," she breathes against his lips, "Show me."

With a growl, Colin complies, his rhythm quickening. His mouth finds hers, capturing her moans as their kisses grow frantic, desperate. He feels her tighten around him, her body arching into his as he shifts slightly, angling his hips to find that perfect spot within her.

Her head falls back, a choked cry escaping her lips as he hits it just right. "Colin!" she gasps her voice a broken plea, her hands clutching at his shoulders.

"That's it," he encourages, his own control fraying. "I've got you." 

"Colin," she mumbles.

"Pen," driving into her one last time, sending them both spiraling over the edge.

Colin pulls back, slipping out of her with a slow, deliberate movement that makes Penelope gasp softly. He takes her hand, his grip firm but tender, and gently tugs her forward. "Come with me," his voice low, "I want to be able to see you." He leads her toward the bedroom, the soft glow of the lantern casting light across the room.

As they reach the edge of the bed, Colin turns to face her, his hands moving to her waist as he slowly guides her back onto the sheets.

Penelope watches him, a flush rising to her cheeks as he positions her in the center of the bed, his eyes tracing over her body. Before joining her, they lay on their side facing each other.

"Hey," he murmurs, his voice soft and warm. One hand props up his head as the other caresses her back, trailing slowly down to her hips and lower, lingering as if savoring every curve. Meanwhile, one of Penelope's arms rests under a pillow, and the other settles on Colin's waist, fingers gently gripping as she leans into his touch.

"What books are in our private library instead of downstairs?" she asks, her curiosity piqued.

"Works deemed a bit too… daring for polite society. The ones I deem inappropriate for anyone but your eyes," he replies.

"Oh? Such as?" she presses.

"Well, there's some of the classical works. Ovid's Ars Amatoria , for instance. It's poetry, technically," he says, his eyes locking onto hers with a knowing look, "but it's far from the kind of poetry you'd read to your mother."

Penelope lets out a soft laugh.

Colin shifts, thinking for a moment. "I have a translation of The Decameron by Boccaccio. Scandalous in parts. It's... an exploration of human nature, let's say."

"There's more, of course," he continues, his voice lowering conspiratorially. "I managed to get my hands on an old copy of Fanny Hill —don't ask how. And then there are a few manuscripts that were never officially published.

"Will the travel journals of a Mr. Colin Bridgerton be amongst the collection?"

"Perhaps," he replies thoughtfully, "although they may need some revisions. I plan to ask my muse for guidance and be my editor."

"And who might that be?" she asks, a smile forming.

"You," he says simply, his gaze intense as it meets hers.

"Not your French—"

He cuts her off, his voice firm and unwavering. "Nothing compares to this. Nothing is like the inspiration you provide me. I've been quite the prolific writer since our first kiss. You should revisit the journal, take a peek anytime you want, into my endless thoughts of you, my desire for you, how you spur my imagination, both mystical and here on earth."

"Can you read me the passage of our first kiss?" she asks softly, her eyes gleaming with curiosity.

"Okay," he agrees, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

Colin climbs out of bed and walks over to the private library. He opens the drawer of his desk and retrieves his journal, feeling a surge of warmth as he runs his fingers over its worn cover. Turning back, he heads toward the bed, crawling in beside Penelope. This time, Colin sits up with the journal in one hand, while Penelope shifts, resting her head on his chest as her makeshift pillow, her eyes glancing up at him expectantly.

Using his right hand, Colin carefully flips through the pages, finding the entry. As he settles on the right spot, his thumb grazes Penelope's cheek, his fingers trailing gently along her skin. She closes her eyes briefly before looking up at him again.

"Here it is," he murmurs, his gaze flicking to hers before dropping to the words he had so carefully penned.

I still cannot fathom what happened last night. I write this now with a hand that trembles, still feeling the warmth of her lips on mine, the taste of her lingering in my soul. Penelope.  We were in the garden—of all places, that damned garden I've walked through a hundred times, thinking it mundane. But not last night. Last night, it became enchanted, a place beyond time. The moon hung low, casting a soft glow on the roses, and there she stood, more radiant than I had ever allowed myself to notice. Her eyes, wide and uncertain, drew me in. And for the first time, I allowed myself to see her fully—the depth, the beauty, the quiet strength. One moment, we were speaking, her voice like honey in the night air, and then she asks for a kiss and I was reaching for her. My hand cupped her cheek, and she looked up at me with such surprise and hope that I swear it nearly broke me. I could feel the tremor of her shoulders, the way her eyes searched mine as if seeking some answer I could only give in one way. It was soft at first, barely a brush of lips. And that was it. I was lost. I pulled her closer, deepening the kiss, needing to show her everything I'd held back for so long. Her lips parted under mine, and she sighed, a sound so beautiful I felt it echo in my bones. I can still hear that tiny gasp of breath, like a secret shared in the dark. She tasted of tea and something sweet, something that was wholly Penelope. I paused for a moment, intending to kiss her again, but something made me stop. I wanted to look into her eyes to see if she was just as affected by this kiss as I was. Was this shattering her as it was shattering me? When I finally drew back, I took her face in, flushed and radiant. Her cheeks were a deep pink, her eyes glazed. And I... I was undone. But then, she did something I hadn't expected. She blinked at me, her lips still parted, and whispered, "Thank you." Before I could respond and decipher the meaning behind her words, she turned and ran. Ran. I stood there, dazed, my heart still pounding as I watched her disappear.  It took me a full moment to process what had just happened, to register the emptiness left in her wake. Thank you? For what? For making me crave more than I had ever allowed myself to dream of? She was gone, and I was left alone, I don't know how long I stood there, wrapped in that moment, but it felt endless and all too fleeting. I've kissed before, or so I thought, but nothing compares to this. To her. I walked away last night, my mind spinning and now, here I sit, trying to put what feels impossible to capture into words.

"You're astonishing, Colin," Penelope breathes, her eyes wide with admiration as she gazes at him. A hint of vulnerability flickers across her face as she looks down, biting her lip. "I ran because I was embarrassed," she admits softly.

"Embarrassed?" Colin echoes, tilting his head, his eyes searching her face for an answer.

"That I asked for a kiss," she confesses, her cheeks warming under his gaze.

He shakes his head, a gentle smile curving his lips. "Braver than me," he murmurs, lifting her chin with a tender touch so their eyes meet.

"I felt foolish," she admits, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Do you still feel foolish?” he asks softly, his thumb gently caressing her chin. “Knowing how it affected me?”

She shakes her head, a small smile forming on her lips. "No."

"That warms my heart," Colin responds, his voice softening.

"I'll keep your cock warm, too," she responds boldly.

"Penelope Featherington!" he exclaims, shock evident on his face. But almost instantly, the surprise melts into an awestruck grin. He grabs her, pulling her close for a kiss, his lips hovering just a breath away. Then, he pauses, his eyes gleaming with something more profound, "Penelope Bridgerton," he settles on, kissing her with all the tenderness and passion she inspires.

Penelope's fingers brush along his arm as she settles in, whispering in his ear, "I want you."

Colin kneels on the bed, positioning himself between her legs once more. His hands move to her thighs, gently parting them as he leans down, his lips brushing against her skin in a series of slow, teasing kisses as Colin moves to claim her once more. 

He enters her slowly this time, his eyes locked on hers as he watches her react to every movement, every sensation. The rhythm they find is different now—unhurried. Colin's gaze flickers over her flushed cheeks, her parted lips, and how her body moves beneath his. 

He watches her face, captivated by every expression that crosses it—the pleasure, the need, the trust.

[battydora]

nsfw, sub. urogi, dom. reader, adult reader!!, gn. reader (cock mentioned, can be a strap or not), pet play, praise kink, handjobs, anal sex, restraints, cnc (safe word agreed before narrative), ruined orgasm, absolute filthy smut

urogi is so cute when he's being fucked, he's such a lovely pet.

he's playful, he's always smiling and cracking small comments through the act, but most of the time because he faces how flustered he actually is by being goofy. his laughter comes out brokenly from his mouth when you tell him he's being such a good pet for you, his cheeks darken and his stomach flutters at the praise.

urogi is also restless, he does not stay still for a moment, he always feels and listens to his body so he can't stop his hips from swinging while giving him head or handjobs, from fluttering his wings excitedly, from digging his claws onto the matress and ripping the fabric, from kicking his feet when he's close, even shivering and getting goosebumps from your hand only running along his back.

don't be surprised if he gets louder as you go on, he is most likely to scream if you make him feel too good. but dear mercy, the real problem is when he moves too much, he kicks his feet and swings his hips so much more when he's approaching orgasm. you get to play with this sometimes, by giving him a punishment.

he cries so loudly when he can't feel himself fully, he gets desperate as you torture him by having him all tied up to a chair, no movements allowed, no freedom at all. his upper taloons are tied behind his back, lower ones tied to the chair's legs and wings closed restrained with chains. he suffers even more when you're giving him a handjob and his orgasm approaches, restraints never letting him rock around, feeling desperate and uncomfortable in his own body. pretty tears rolling down his cheeks at his ruined orgasm, whining "noo..! stop it, please, untie me (y/n) please!"

his complaints go unaddressed as you tighten your grip on his cock with both hands and begin to jerk him off harder and faster, making him shout at the overstimulation on his sensitive and swollen tip "don't be so scandalous, be a good pet and take it".

he can't break free from the ropes and so he begins to beg again "no! no! stop!! nghah! i c-can't!! i can't take it! make it s-stop! please please!!" he cries out, his body desperately fighting against your restrictions trying to escape your merciless torture "fuck, fuck, fuck!!" more tears falling off his eyes as he shut them close.

it only takes him a few moments to loosen and fall exhausted on the chair, his body no longer capable of enduring his punishment, dry dark red cheeks and yellow eyes begging to rest. his chest goes up and down trying to recover but he's so tired, he just wants now an eternal nap, he, the so hyperactive urogi, wants nothing more than rest.

but the fun only just begins for you, now that he endured his punishment all the way, it is time to reward him, just when he gets to control his breath and recover just a little bit, you untie all of his extremities and carry him to the futon, making him lay on his tummy for you. he knows what you are doing but he's so ruined and sore to even speak. "my little pet took the punishment so well, it shall receive a reward for being so strong~" he barely jolts at your thumb rubbing his entrance before sliding two fingers in, his cheeks go darker and his mouth twists into a grimace, he feels he could almost cry for being praised so lovingly after a torture that felt like hours.

you succesfully manage to make urogi stay still while you fuck him without any restraints. you fuck his ass surprisingly lovingly, slow hip movements allowing you to dig deeper inside of him and making him moan the sweetest noises you ever heard. he enjoys this slow fucking, especially after being used mercilessly by you minutes ago.

"my baby, i was so rough to you, you like being fucked like this? yeah? mmh, of course, you're my good pet, you deserve no less" you say as you slam your hips a little bit faster against him.

your praises only help him feel more dizzy and cock-drunk. he just loves how good your dick feels inside of him and how gently you treat him, he is too tired to have his body responding to you so he just mumbles and moans nonsense until he comes again, as a prize this time.

masterlist | pinned post | rules

thanks for reading!

[thotsofintrusion]

freaky little wen junhui who invites you to a movie night with the members, but asks you to wear his favorite skirt and panties. junhui who makes you sit in his lap, no matter how many seats there are. when the movies started and everyone’s calmed down, he starts making his move. he slowly rubs up and down your thighs under your blanket and if any of the members caught on, they’d think it was just jun needing something to do with his hands. you know better though. you know the way jun thinks and the way he loves to start as slow as possible in working you up. you can feel the way he arches his fingers just a little to make his nails run into your skin as he rubs your legs. you can feel his slightly labored breathing blowing on the back of your neck. and you can feel the beginning of his hard on pressing lightly into your lap.

this goes on for a while. jun just sits there and rubs your legs, enjoying watching you slowly get more and more worked up for him as he starts to spend more and more time near your cunt. when the action picks up in the movie, jun gives your cunt all his focus. he flips your skirt out of the way and presses his fingers right into your clit, loving the way you jump the first time he does it. he rubs slow circles, feeling the way your cunt leaks more and more for him while he works. the feeling of your panties slowly getting more and more drenched is his favorite thing in the world.

when the climax of the movie hits, his torture starts. jun begins to press lightly into the spot of your panties right over your hole. you’re confused, up until now everything he’s done has been procedural, familiar, routine, but this is new. the deeper he presses his fingers into your panties, the more anxious you become. you’re nervous about what he’s planning, unsure if this is going to go well or not. you let him continue regardless.

soon enough he has your panties pulled tight around your hips and his fingers, no longer pulling his fingers out of your hole as he fucks you. he’s fingering you with your panties in the way. you’ve never felt anything like this before. with every move your underwear rub against your clit. the texture of the lace that jun loves rubs deliciously at your soaked walls. jun adds another finger and stretches you and your underwear even further.

you’re getting close and jun can tell. he slows down a little bit as you get closer and his other hand moves up your shirt to tug at your nipples under your bra. when you jolt and keen quietly through your lips, he lets out a cruel, quiet chuckle. you can see the edge. and jun leans into your ear and whispers, “we’ve got a long movie night ahead of us. are you sure you want to cum now? you know how i feel about stopping.” this halts you in your tracks, and you realize.

you’re stuck on this couch surrounded by twelve other men and your boyfriend wen junhui, who plans on making your wildest dreams come true.

[kingofthe-egirls]

LUFFY x Y/N (modern au) part 4

part 1 part 2 part 3

(cw: modern au, smut, fingering, cunnilingus, orgasm countdown, kissing, angst/fluff, comfort, reader is a survivor. [a/n--sorry i'm like this. i'm using these stories to heal])

(a/n: i'm overwhelmed with unabashed joy and therefore must never cringe)

Songs: "Jackie and Wilson" by Hozier, "To Be Alone" by Hozier

word count: 1.7k

***

Luffy leans his weight into you, pressing you into the hotel mattress.

"Hiya," he murmurs against your lips. His elbows are on either side of your head, and he's thrusting gently against your clothed cunt. His jeans are riding low around his hips, and you scrabble desperate fingers under the hem of his shirt. His abs are soft and warm under your touch.

"Hey," you breathe, lifting the arch in your back to press your chest deeper into his. He slides his arms under your shoulders, and holds you close as he kisses you again. Your arms are around his neck, pressing him as tightly to you as you can. It's so good to feel him.

Real.

Apart from your virtual ventures, you haven't gotten much play besides your girlfriend. (Which is great, by the way.) But it's been a while since you've had a man. You love masculinity, love the traces of his jaw against your skin. Love the weight of him, pressing into you. Nami is so much smaller than you--you curvy and her thin--you always feel a little clumsier, around her. And femininity is great and all, but sometimes you just need a dick.

And Luffy seems more than happy to give it to you.

"What can I do ta ya?" He rasps softly against your ear. He takes the lobe in his teeth, pulling slightly. You whine in the back of your throat--short and sweet.

"Um--," you push up your chin, scooting closer under him. "I w-wanna make you cum," you confess.

Cherry blossoms bloom along his cheeks.

"I'd like that," he grins, teething at your jawline, "You've already done it once before. Plus, like, two more times since then, ha."

You bust out a laugh, helpless beneath him. He shakes over you, giggling too. "Well, I'm so glad," you huff out a breath, and press a kiss to his collarbone. His round face is open wide and shining, eyes crinkling like half-moons in his bronze skin.

Wow.

You've got it bad.

Luffy nuzzles against your cheek. "Thanks for that, baby." He rolls his hips against you once more. You gasp, face heating like a rose.

"Lu-uffy," you hook your legs around his thick waist, bringing him closer (harder) against you. He starts thrusting quicker, friction both electrocuting and freezing you in place. He regards you down the edge of his tip-turned nose. A sharp eyebrow twitches upward as he smirks.

"Wan' more?"

You nod, furiously, as you break away to tug off your shirt. Luffy sits back on his heels to take off his own, pulling the red t-shirt off over his head with one hand. You stare at his frame, lithe and muscular, and lick your lips. "You're welcome, by the way."

He giggles.

"Shishishi, guess it's my turn to please you," he leans forward again, hand going to the small of your back as he lays you down. The pillows crinkle beneath you. The hotel smells like lemon-scented bleach. A watercolor painting of a fox hangs on the wall in front of you.

Luffy's face is between your legs.

He kisses around your abdomen, over your bellybutton and along the waistband of your skirt. He slyly unzips it, dragging the silver buckle down the length of your thigh. He flicks his dark eyes back up to you, questioning, and you swallow with a nod. He pulls the leather fabric off of you in one, swift motion. Then his fingers are curled in your underwear, pulling them down your legs, too. You let him, lifting your hips for him to undress you. The cotton slides down your shivering thighs, his fingertips grazing your already-heated skin. He smiles, genuinely, as he gazes at your heat.

"S'pretty for me," he murmurs, ghosting both hands back up your thighs. He lies down slowly, making intense eye contact with your clit. You hum, snuggling back into the covers. They were soft, and downy. Your tits splay out side to side as you get comfy.

"Like it?" You ask, arching an eyebrow as he grins at you. His eyes flare like black opal, and your stomach drops. You're fucking in for it.

"Love it, pretty."

And then his tongue is at your clit, flicking over and over again with an intense speed. You groan, arching your back as your legs tighten around his head. His hair is fluffy and ticklish against your inner thigh. You card your fingers through it, gripping tightly. His locks are velvet soft, and you whine.

He pulses in with two fingers, curling upward with the pads of his third and fourth digits. His fingers are strong and thick, and he pumps them into you while he laps at your clit.

"Mm-fuck!" You squeal, twitching against his jaw. His licking and sucking fill the room with perverse noises, and your muffled squeaks aren't doing much to help. Luffy is hungrily groaning into your cunt, grinding his hips against the bed. "Y-you--," you pant, squeezing your eyes shut, "I--want you!" You moan with your spine curled forward, hunching around your pleasure as Luffy speeds up.

"Not yet," he tugs at your strings, playing you like a violin. Deft fingers illustrate a symphony your nerves are only just this shy of being able to withstand. You whimper, nails digging into his scalp. "Wanna see ya cum, first."

His nose is pressed against your pubic bone, his tongue now doing figure eights on your messy clit. Saliva and slick slip down his face and onto the mattress beneath you. He traces imaginary shapes on your clit, over and over again, almost like letters. You let out a gasp, laughing.

"Ya spellin' somethin'?" You ask, neck craned to watch him work.

"Mm," he hums, fingers stretching out like scissors. You shake, beneath his touch. "Wanna guess?"

You laugh out loud, now, and let your head fall back against the pillows with a soft thump. "Umm...," you breathe, chest ragged and heaving. Your skin is on fire by now, plush and deep velvet as you rake your hands over your own thighs. Your fingernails leave traces of scarlet ribbon in their wake. "M-maybe, 'cum?'" You guess, rutting your hips up against his face.

"Nuh-uh."

"Fuck--," you buck your hips. He giggles, vibrating against your cunt. "You're impossible," you mutter, before bringing your focus back on the shapes his tongue is now lazily curling out along your clit.

A curl, a circle, a line?

You whimper, unable to focus.

"I--I have ADHD," you cover your eyes with a forearm, "This isn't fair."

"Me too!" He happily exclaims, before diving back in to repeat his movements. His tongue is so...dexterous.

"L...Luffy?" You sound out, eyebrows scrunched as you search the ceiling for answers. "Are you spelling your own name?"

"Luffy's," he corrects, "'Cuz you're mine now."

"Oh, am I?" You tease, relaxing back in the bed as he fucks you with his hand. Your body is shivering, aching now, as it craves release. "Did you do the apostrophe?"

"The what?"

"Nevermind," you laugh, shaking your head against the pillow. Your hair is spread out, soft and tangled, around you. You lift up a little to make eye contact with him. He's staring directly at your cunt, pumping his fingers in and out of you slowly. He's drooling.

"Gonna make me cum, or what?"

He flares his gaze back up to you, wild and dark, and starts to speed up. He crooks his fingers, his other thumb pressing hard into your clit now. "Five," he says, without warning.

"What?"

He looks over your shaking form with adoration, plus something that almost looks like bloodlust. "Four." He licks his lips as he gazes back up at you. He pinches your clit, and you scream.

"Luffy!!!" You squeeze your eyes shut, toes curling as you bow forward. He snickers.

"Three."

His fingers crook up--delicious--as he speeds up inside you. His pace is unbelievably fast--almost like a vibrator. "F-fuck--," you groan, scrabbling at his head with feeble hands.

"Two."

He's pulling at your clit between finger and thumb, harsh and lovely and spurring you on toward the swell of your symphony. "That's it, baby, moan f'me," he coos, pressing kisses to your inner thigh. "One."

Fuck--

"Lu--," his name is cut off as a chorus on your lips, now gone silent as you shudder through an orgasm. You've never cum this hard, before.

Your name is silent on his lips, as well.

You don't see it, bowed forward and clutching at his hair, but his lips move in the shape of your name, over and over as he gazes at you in awe. Your pretty lips, your wild hair, he can't handle the way you choke on his name. He slows his fingers down inside you.

"Good, baby?" He asks, running a strong hand up and down your leg. His other goes to palm his cock beneath his shorts. He's aching for you, now. You nod, forcing your breathing to cool down. Something was--coming up for you, and you can't help the tears that slide hot and salty onto your cheeks.

[a/n: this is now completely selfish and personal to me, so don't read on if you'd like the story to end here. smut is over now lol]

"'M...sorry," you say, embarrassment flooding through you. "Sorry," you shake, gone cold all of a sudden, as something knotted and thorny comes undone in your chest. Something after--after all these years. "I'm sorry!"

He shushes you, cooing at you immediately. He rushes up to wrap you in his arms, stroking your hair as you start to sob. You press your face into his sternum, and take a shuddering breath. "'M sorry," you say again, pressed against his sweaty skin. You sniff, wetly.

"I'm sorry," he says, kissing the top of your head. He feels so strong around you. "Did I do something wrong?"

You swallow, shaking your head against the muscles of his chest. His scar is a flat pane of scarlet in your eye. "Nope, not you. Someone--else." That's all you say, and that's all he asks.

"I got you," he whispers, humming as he plants more kisses atop your head. You cringe into him, wrapping your own arms around his back. "Don't say sorry anymore, baby. 'S not your fault."

"I know," you whisper, bitter. "I'm just--sorry I'm like this, is all. I don't wanna be, anymore. But..."

"But ya gotta cry, sometimes. I know," he whispers, then tilts your chin up to his face. He's smiling softly at you, hotel lights sending twinkles in his gray eyes. "I cry, too."

You smile, in spite of yourself, and reach up to kiss his cheek.

"Thank you."

***

[tojiscrack]

Recommend us some good jjk things u already read 🎀

say please 😐

unfortunately, i don’t read jjk fics… like, at all. i have two main reasons why:

i write them, sure, but i have this intense fear of reading jjk/reader fics (hypocritical, i know, but idc 🌝) simply ‘cause of the fact that i have these characters a certain way in my mind: VERY CANONICALLY-CENTRED.

when reading, i’d enjoy that with only a TOUCH of fanon, seeing as it’s usually romantic, reader-insert, love interest fics, and we’ve only ever actually seen two couples in jjk, and not even in depth — miwa and mechamaru + toji and mamaguro — therefore we can’t exactly say for certain what other characters would be like in a relationship and stuff: what we picture and write here is fanon.

but i did try a couple times. it just wasn’t for me, ig.

secondly, literally every gojo/reader story ever (i say gojo specifically cuz i’m only interested in reading about him and no one else 😭) has smut in it.

unpopular take, but i dislike smut. very much.

so essentially, i’m useless in this department.

p.s. that’s not to say that you yourself can’t read other fics and enjoy them the way they are. that’s great for you, and lovely for the author, but my personal opinion is that i just can’t, and that’s alr. i’ll silently move on and write my own :)

[gothsuguru]

KAIRO . YOUR FUCKING WIPS GOOD GOD 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 ohhhhh narrowing them down was so tough but …… i neeeeeed to know more (read: all) about i hope i don’t murder me; i hope i don’t burden you + you should let me ride shotgun + belladonna ……. (THERAPIST!JAKU. need them to corrupt me . who said that)

(alsooooo i love you <3 hope you eat a big nice tasty breakfast with your fav beverage to boot :333)

ARI MY PRECIOUS ANGELMOUSE <333 TYSM FOR THE ASK AND ALSO MFNDNDND the way i KNEW you would ask about therapist dilfjaku 🤭 that one is a arikenkairo special for REAL <333 at least in theory :3

i hope i don’t murder me; i hope i don’t burden you:

THIS IS THE PROFESSOR!GETO X HEAVENLY RESTRICTED!READER ONE HEHE i’m so excited to resume writing this omfg… the title is based off a lyric from “the beach” by the neighbourhood <3 i’m genuinely very intrigued to explore a version of suguru that hasn’t defected but that’s still so… filled w guilt & shame & anger? like in the beginning of the fic it’ll be them all as high schoolers and then it’ll be them as adults and i’m so excited to show the dichotomy of suguru — the stark similarities/differences between young & older geto!

i haven’t really decided yet how it would be when the two meet at jjk high………. i think in general it’s very bittersweet like suguru is hit w freight train of nostalgia and also… just overwhelming shame. and then ofc reader may feign a casual façade but i think they feel so hurt and also responsible for suguru leaving? even though it’s not their fault? idk i’m just interested in exploring that relationship and how suguru’s past actions would inform their future!

you should let me ride shotgun:

RAHHHHHH THIS ONE IS SO FUN AND SILLY IN MY BRAIN :3 a mix of a crackfic and fluff and action but also oddly bittersweet? rich bratty gojo will always be a beloved of mine and i think him annoying his new bodyguard is so fun to think abt… everyone has always left the gojo’s bc their son is just soooooo . bratty and disrespectful and loud and always pushes people’s buttons for his own enjoyment! that is… until he meets READER… who’s just soooooo amused. their vibe is like a constantly amused kenjaku <3 fond, finds him a lil pathetic but he’s cute so he gets a pass, and more than anything i wanna make sure the bodyguard isn’t too serious 😭 need them to be an enabler so bad hehe

(also v excited to explore the bittersweetness of it all too… gojo pushing others away before they can leave him……….. DELICIOUS)

belladonna:

this one is so 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 dilfjaku with a tight black turtleneck, reading glasses, one leg swung over the other as he rests his temple on his fingers………. gulps. need him to look at me like i’m his prey bc he wants to eat me WHO SAID THAT……… ANYWAYS! this is actually gonna be a smut fic so i will try my hardest to make it sensual and fucked up <3 i don’t know yet if i want reader to be his patient or if he’s just a dilf w a therapist occupation and reader comes by as his intern…… office siren!kenjaku perhaps…….. idk………… need both of us to be sent to HR is all i’m gonna say <333 belladonna is another word for “deadly nightshade” (also a name for this fic that i’m waffling on either one lmk which is better bestie 🙂‍↕️) and i think it works so well for kenjaku… need him to corrupt and manipulate reader but lil does he know they love it <3

i haven’t thought out reader’s personality or anything yet i just know they’re down horrendous and their life goal is to look up at kenjaku while resting their head on his lap………. (also kenny’s life goal… he wants to pat their head and have them look up at him soooooo baddddd) ANYWAYS I’M SO EXCITED TO WRITE THESE FICS HEHE TYSM FOR ASKING ABT THEM ARI :3 MWAH

[artemisiatridentata]

I just finished reading Fourth Wing after picking it up because of all the hype, and because I love dragons, and... I have to say it's the worst book I've read in quite a while lmao. the dragons were its only redeeming quality

[hyewka]

RANA MILESTONEEEE

ok lol this is kind of insane and i was not prepared for this at all but regardless HAPPY 4000🎉🎉🎉😭 i love you all so much i genuinely dont know how we got here like at all.

[sapphosclosefriend]

I may or may not be making a 70s x-rated movies poster for a fic idea I have for Nat 🫣

[astrum-aetherium]

Hey, I have newly discovered your blog and I've been obsessively going through all your posts. I usually do not see a point in sending in any asks in these kind of things but your ideas really thrill me. Your last elaboration on car sex with Henry really got me thinking whether Henry would be someone to be into being intimate outdoors or not and in what setting that would happen? Like maybe somewhere by the lake in the country side??

hi! welcome! it gladdens me greatly that you're indulging in the passion of this blog, and thank you for this rather thrilling submission.

i feel like he would be threatened by the humiliating aspect of being discovered in the context of outdoor sex, and would therefore need at least semi-solid reassurance that the two of you would remain undetected. this is why, even for car sex, he'd seek out the farthest and most clandestine of places, ditches, abandoned parking lots. he would simply seek to avoid any unwanted, bashful confrontations. being seen wouldn't exactly be his problem, i'm guessing — thinking of this makes me consider him from an exhibitionist perspective, and i'm honestly not that mad at it — it's just a possible uncomfortable interaction that he would be trying to prevent.

this is not to say that he wouldn't partake in outdoor sex — he would want it. i deem that entirely possible. the lake is a wondrous idea, for which you need to accept my gratuity, dear anon. during the day, i feel like it would either have to be when it's just the two of you on the premises, with the rest having taken off on a trip back to the city or something, the staff not present, either, or you would have to be hidden well, obscured from unassuming eyes. i can see it in the context of a study picnic you'd drag him out on, having spread a blanket by the lake in the middle of a fine summer day to merrily read your books together in pleasant silence. it could be beneath a large-shaded tree, as well, with him seated propped against the trunk with your back pressed to his chest.

eventually, however, it would progress to less innocent matters — his fingertips will have teasingly pranced upon your bare skin, a fire would be struck up in the pit of your stomach, and a few torturous minutes of nonchalantly teasing one another later, he would be buried in the billowing skirt of your dress, circling your clit with his tongue and folding your leg into you by the pit of your knee. you'd be moaning for him softly all the way until your orgasm, only to have him grasp you by the very same pits of your knees anew and press them into you as he'd slide in afterward. it would be a passionate, picturesque experience — having him move in and out of you so teasingly slowly, and yet so deep, the soft summer air circling your skin, insects and birds lilting about.

as an alternative, in the case of him being too concerned with being discovered upon engaging in acts of intimacy with you in broad daylight, you could likewise sneak out to the lake in the middle of the night. it would certainly be more of a sinister, whimsical, yearning experience — he would have you quivering and whimpering by the water, the surroundings moonlit, silence befallen around you like a shroud. he would definitely write a diary entry in latin about that encounter.

as an additional thought that i've been nurturing lately: in my mind, francis' country estate has a greenhouse somewhere on the property. henry, as a gardener, would frequent it quite often, as i'm assuming. herein, of course, we are treated with the possibility of him taking you along — and then, of course, being utterly alone and surrounded by all those beautiful, pleasantly scented plants, well... one thing could lead to another. shoot me another ask if you want me to elaborate on this scenario further. henry and gardening is a joint concept that cannot let me go, and then applied to a lascivious setting... the urges transcend the aesthetic, they're primal.