#not like it's obvious it's not like i use this pic ALL THE TIME :D

[leadendeath]

hi. tell me what is wrong with me.

got inspired to do this by the txtpost i saw recently (this has been cowardly saved to my drafts for a while (YEAH A VERY LONG WHILE THIS DRAFT IS FROM MAY WHY-))

[alexjcrowley]

One of the funniest shit I've ever seen looking up The Banshees of Inisherin hashtag is that so many posts under that hashtag come from users who have profile pic/user name related to Succession. Like of course you are obsessed with the theme of perversion of love and seeking affection to the point of (self)distruction.

[nejiverse]

SNOW

Gojo Satoru

In which it’s your daughter’s first time seeing snow and Gojo is more excited than she is. Fem! Reader

an: merry christmassss!!

wc: 667 words

It was your baby's first snow day and Gojo was so excited that it could almost make anyone believe that it was actually his first snow day.

"Satoru...she'll freeze in that. And will you at least let me get my scarf first?! I promise you the snow isn't going anywhere", you sighed and took the little girl from his arms to change her into something warmer.

Gojo pouted and followed behind you, his shoulders slumped.

"I mean honestly! You're acting like it's your first time seeing snow", you chuckled as you slipped your daughter into a fuzzy pramsuit, placing little mittens on her hands and a hat which you hoped she would keep on and not attempt to rip off her head.

"It's my daughter's first snow day of course I'd be excited!", he said in as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He picked up the girl and lifted her up in the air while you went to fetch your scarf. "Isn't that right princess?", he cooed as his daughter babbled as if to respond to his comment.

Upon getting outside, Gojo placed the little girl slowly onto the bed of snow as to not startle her.

He crouched down to her height and pointed at the flakes on the ground. "This is s-n-o-w", he sounded out carefully.

She cocked her head to the side, looking at the snow with her eyebrows scrunched up cutely and when she tried to repeat her father's words, it sounded like she said 'no' more than 'snow' but Gojo clapped for her regardless.

You quickly came in front of your daughter to get a video as you saw her start to take small steps further into the snow, enjoying the crunchy sound.

Gojo took the opportunity to turn away and gather up a bit of snow in his hands, rolling it into a ball all the while laughing silently to himself.

“Toru! Look at this pic—”, before you could even finish your sentence, a lump of snow came in contact with your arm.

Gojo burst out in hysterics and hugged his stomach tightly as you narrowed your eyes at him.

“You asked for it..”, you made your own snowball and launched it at your husband, hitting him square in the face.

Gojo wiped the snow from his face and looked at you in betrayal.

“Hey! What ever happened to the ‘below the shoulder’ rule?!”.

“This isn’t dodgeball Toru”, you rolled your eyes playfully.

The little girl let out giggles at her parents’ antics and attempted to make her own snowball, packing as much snow as her hands could hold and waddling up to her father.

With all her might, she threw the snow which barely grazed the man’s leg.

Gojo dramatically fell back on his butt. “Oh my goodness d/n! You’re too strong for me!”.

She had a pout on her lips and patted the fallen man’s shoulder as an attempt at consoling her father.

Gojo opened his arms. “I only accept apologies in hugs!”.

Your daughter leaped into his arms cheerfully and let her head rest against her father’s chest. Gojo looked your way, signalling you over with a nod of his head.

“You too wifey, I could’ve broken my nose cause of you!”.

“Oh I’m sure you would”, you voiced sarcastically yet you couldn’t hold back the smile creeping onto your lips as you embraced him against the snow along with your daughter.

Gojo could’ve simply used his infinity to block the snow from reaching him but the idea never even crossed his mind once. He would much rather embrace the joyous moment with his two most precious girls.

masterlist :)

[kozmicmizuu]

at this point expect random lil senecios and headcanons just popping up 😔🫶

also is it obvious i have a favorite trio????

(a lil uzuigiyuu, rengiyuu, uzuren, actually just put three together uzurengiyuu)

————————————————————————

Kyojuro: Tengen doesn’t deserve you.

Kyojuro: If they don't treat you right by now, you're gone.

Giyuu: I'm gone.

Kyojuro: Now go chop their dick off!

Kyojuro: sapnu puaS.

Tengen : What??

Giyuu: What language is that.

Kyojuro: Turn your phone 180 degrees.

*Kyojuro was removed from the groupchat*

Giyuu: Kyojuro, you do remember when we agreed we were better off as friends, right?

Kyojuro, naked in Giyuu's bed: No, I absolutely do not.

Giyuu, already taking off their clothes: ... Me neither.

Tengen : There are 20 letters in the alphabet, right?

Giyuu: Nope, there's 26.

Tengen : Ah, I must have forgotten U, R, A, Q, T.

Giyuu: Aww, that's cute, but you're still missing one.

Tengen : You'll get the D later ;).

Giyuu: No.

Giyuu: I’m the sexiest bitch in this therapy waiting room.

Kyojuro: Don’t preach to me about romance, Giyuu. I had a three-way in a hot-air balloon.

Giyuu: I know, i was there and so was Tengen.

Kyojuro: Oh yeah.

Kyojuro: What are you in the mood for?

Giyuu: World domination.

Kyojuro: That's a bit ambitious.

Giyuu: You are my world.

Kyojuro: Aww...

Giyuu:

Kyojuro:

Giyuu:

Kyojuro: OH.

Giyuu: My bad…

Giyuu: We need a diversion. I say Kyojuro gets naked.

Tengen : No.

Giyuu: I could get naked.

The squad: NO!!!

Tengen: I mean… if you really want to-

Kyojuro: NO DONT THATS ONLY FOR US TO SEE

Giyuu: WHAT

Kyojuro: There. How do I look?

Giyuu: Like a cheap French harlot.

Kyojuro: French?!

Tengen: If we were in prison you guys would be like my bitches.

Kyojuro: Of course we would, right Giyuu?

Giyuu: Yeah, i mean we already kinda are.

Kyojuro: What’s your body count?

Giyuu: Do you mean sex or murder?

Kyojuro: I hate the fact that i have to specify which one im taking about.

Kyojuro: Is there a cactus where your heart should be?

Giyuu: What’s up your ass this morning??

Tengen : *walks in* ...Hey.

Giyuu: Hmm… nevermind.

Kyojuro: WAIT NO

Giyuu: *sucking on a popsicle*

Kyojuro: Pfft, you practicing for when Tengen gets here?

Giyuu: *takes a huge ass bite out of the popsicle*

Kyojuro: *Concern*

Giyuu: don’t worry he’s into that.

Kyojuro: Oh ok- WAIT WHAT

Giyuu: look Tengen , I'm not slut shaming you but...

Giyuu: Actually yeah, I'm TOTALLY slut shaming you.

Tengen: SHUT THE FUCK UP

Giyuu: What did Tengen do this time?

Kyojuro: More like WHO did Tengen do this time?

Giyuu: *Nodding in agreement*

Tengen : I like your top, Kyojuro!

Giyuu: I have a name, you know.

Kyojuro: *sighs* Why. Why are you like this.

Giyuu: I thought is was funny ngl.

Tengen : Sorry, I'm late to the party. I've been doing things.

Kyojuro, entering in an unbuttoned shirt: I got caught up doing things too.

Giyuu: Wow, Tengen was late too! What a coincidence!

Giyuu: I committed all 7 deadly sins in 30 minutes.

Tengen : Wow, I've gotta hear this.

Giyuu: I was angry and envious of my neighbor so I lazily seduced his wife and ate all his groceries and didn't share.

Tengen : You forgot pride.

Giyuu: No, I'm pretty proud of this.

Giyuu: Why is everyone so obsessed with top or bottom? Honestly, I’d just be excited to have a bunk bed.

Tengen :

Tengen : I'm gonna tell them.

Kyojuro: Don't you dare.

Tengen : Who do we know that has handcuffs?

Giyuu: Well Kyojuro and I-

Kyojuro: *elbows Giyuu*

Giyuu: ...wouldn't know.

Tengen: Damn i didn’t think you’d be kinky Kyo!

Kyojuro: Why single me out!?

Tengen: Quiet people are always kinky.

Giyuu: Nuh uh

Kyojuro: Bonjour, Giyuu. Voulez–vous coucher avec moi?

Giyuu: No, I don't want to sleep with you.

Kyojuro: Is that what that means? Oh, man, I had a really gross tennis instructor.

Giyuu: Know why I called you in here?

Tengen : Because I accidentally sent you a dick pic.

Giyuu: *Stops pouring two glasses of wine.* Accidentally?

Tengen , with a headache: Advil me up, daddy.

Giyuu: I will short out the language centre of your brain if you say anything like that ever again.

Kyojuro, bursting into the room: You two are having sex!

Tengen , not looking up from their book: Really? Giyuu, why didn’t you tell me? I would have put my book down.

Giyuu: I thought we were having a sleepover..

Kyojuro, gardening: Hey, can you bring me the hoe?

Giyuu: Yeah, sure.

*A few minutes later*

Giyuu: Here you go.

Kyojuro:

Giyuu:

Tengen : Why am I here?

Giyuu: I’m so funny.

*At a speed dating event*

Tengen : Oh wow, people are really shallow.

Giyuu: Consider it a background check. For example: Do you have a death certificate?

Tengen : *Checks their pulse* Sorry, not yet.

Giyuu: Good, I'm not fucking a ghost again.

Tengen: Again?

Giyuu: Being a medium is an experience.

Giyuu: Do you think sex without love is a sin?

Tengen : If it is, I’ll see you in hell.

Kyojuro: Why are you two like this?

Tengen : Priest kink is definitely a thing and I am afflicted by it.

Giyuu: Go to church.

Giyuu: WAIT—

Giyuu: Oh look who got laid last night.

Kyojuro: That’s right chumps, missionary accomplished!

Tengen : Heh, Giyuu sneezes like a girl.

Giyuu: How about I pound you like boy?

Giyuu: That didn’t come out right.

————————————————————————

Sigh i’m not well, but i love them sm. They are severely out of character but that makes funny. that’s there dynamic now fr fr. Don’t worry they can wholesome.

[chaosisalwayscrying]

NSFW ABC’S

⇥ synopsis : nsfw abcs for matt!!

⇥ warnings : smut/suggestive content

⇥ extra : SORRY THIS IS LATE TOO SORRY

⇥ masterlist !

⇥ taglist !

A = Aftercare (how they’re like after sex)

literally the best at aftercare. argue w the wall. peppers your face with kisses and is so so gentle. pulls out slowly and immediately goes to get you a warm rag or run you a bath and cuddles you

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

he loves his arms, he loves the way he can lift you and hold you against the wall or how they carry you to the bathtub and back to bed

he LOVES your boobs. biggest boob guy ever. loves laying on them and pushing his dick in between them and leaving hickeys on them.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

started out using condoms but he was not a fan at all. he used them to be safe and you never complained so he figured it was what you preferred. but you both were too in the moment to remember once and you stopped using them since (dw ur on bc)

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

before you got together he accidentally spied on you in the shower and gor SO HORNY that he had to leave the house so you didnt catch him masturbating 😭

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

had one body before you but it was the awkward first time so he wasnt sure what to do, but luckily you were experienced and guided him through it

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

cowgirl. loves when you ride him, and loves watching your boobs bounce in his face

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

hes accidentally funny during intimate sex. theres times when stuff isnt as seriously intimate and he can make a joke or two, but hes more serious

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

trimmed, not buzzcut shaved but not a bush, perfect hair length.

has no preference to how long your hair is, as long as youre happy with it !!

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

loves being romantic, rose petals on the bed, candles, the whole nine yards. wants you to feel loved and appreciated

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

only does it when you cant be with him, like on tour and in boston, uses your instagram pics OR asks you to send him nudes

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

choking, loves to choke you, and loves you be choked (we all saw him in larrays vid.)

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

the van, his bed, the shower, anywhere private

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

weirdly, matt loves when you cook. it makes him think of the future, how youd be with kids, how youd look pregnant, which just makes his breeding kink act up

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn-offs)

roleplay, thinks its really weird and he just cant find it hot

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

yes hes matt the munch but i think he just LOVES the sight of you with his dick shoved down your throat. hes so good at eating you out, and he could sit there for hours, but he could also watch you choke on his dick for hours

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

can do both, depends on his mood and the situation. he can go fast and rough if you ask or if hes frustrated, but if its a gentle day or in the morning, soft and slow is his go to

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

LOVES QUICKIES IN THE VAN. will literally send nick and chris in a store by themselves so you can ride him in the drivers seat. in any other place, hes 50/50

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

kind of, doesnt like the idea of being caught but DOES love doing it in mildly obvious places. wouldnt do it in a dressing room or store bathroom, but would in the bathroom of his friends house or in the van in a parking lot.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

three max, usually lasts long but sometimes he doesnt so it depends on how long he can last

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

none for himself but you own a vibrator. he uses it on you if hes feeling mean or if you convince him (it doesnt take much) he lets you use it on him

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

can be unfair, and he loves to be unfair sometimes, but he also loves when youre unfair to him

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

mostly low grunts or whines in your ear, but if your riding him hes not very good at being quiet. (which is why you can only do so when the house is empty)

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

hates sex scenes in media 😭

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

not that girthy but hes LONGGGGGGG. he hits all the right places 😇

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

7/10, he can go a while without sex but he can get going easy

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

he can stay awake long enough to clean you both up and get your both redressed and put something on the tv, but then hes out

⇥ TAGS !

@sturnioloshacker @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @hertvgirl @cupidzsq @sturnnie @leah-loves-lilies @billkaulitz0630 @sturniolololover @stqrnstars @cicicinquistausa @tylerthecreatorsrealwife

[shapelytimber]

Look, social media aus are very dumb but fun to do fklxkdk Illya would make short videos (mostly) about fashion, and Napoleon would be very unsubtle about being a Spy

I am formally apologizing to the uncle fandom for tiktoker Illya Kuryakin, I have no regrets (also @quijicroix is part responsible, being my evil advisor)

Here are the posts in details, and the profile pics :)

[COMMISSIONS]

No process this time, just me yapping for way to long about every choice and refs that went into this dumb au below vvv

Illya is younger than Napoleon (I usualy headcanon him at around 25 and Napoleon 35ish), so I think their use of social media would be quite different : hence Illya on Tiktok and Napoleon on Instagram. Also it's not the 60s so Illya can be like 10% less reppressed :)) but as a debuff Napoleon now has the technology to call him a nerd

Illya's page started as a cover for some affair, but he ended up kinda enjoying doing it in his free time. It's like a hobby for him, a way to experiment with fashion ! It's what made him want to pursue fashion design as a career after his curent spy job. And also I think he gets more and more nervous the more followers he gets, because as a spy having a chance to get recognise in the street is really bad dkdldlos Napoleon teases him endlessly that he became a tiktoker (as he should)-

Did I, at one point in the project, had to scrap the thirst trap idea to keep the fashion nerd vibes ? Yes I did, but just know he uses the "twink" tag :)

• The first post is a ref to the discotheque affair, not the best episode and a great miss for not including a disco Illya outfit, so I made him one to match the other :D

• The second is to the Hot number, but he gets to wear the thrush pattern !

• The third one is what made me do all of this ! Because, if you're not french, you might not know about one of my favorite yearly twitter threads : Met Gala outfits as INSEE graphs by Clara Dealberto ! Don't care about the met gala, but this is very funny :) and such a Illya Kuryakin thing to do kdkdkd

• fourth one isn't fashion related, it's a ref to popart and the "he has Dostoïevski eyes" line that made us laught a lot

• A little Fiddlesticks for the dog post, because it's a banger episode. Plus a nod to he dog expert from it, with whom Illya had palpable sexual tension fkfkfkl I like to think they kept contact ;) (shoutout to this fic (Intensity by AconitumNapellus) who absolutely get the vision, 10/10 guy to "cheat" on your boyfriend with)

• and the final one is a make over because of course it is

As for Napoleon, being older and less invested in this, an instagram made sense. But crutialy, I get such strong modern oss117 vibes from Napoleon (the way he shoots his gun, the goofy faces, the awkward stance everytime he enters a place, the inexplicable in universe rizz...) dkfkldls modern oss117 was a parody of both 60s james bond and older oss117 movies, but I'm now convinced they also whatched some uncle while doing these, it's just so obvious- anyway all this to say, in the second movie oss117 has to pose as a photographer and gets way too invested in his cover (it's his thing don't question it), and at the end of the movie we get to see all the photography he took during his mission..... Let me tell you how hard it was to resist him having an instagram full of blurry women on the street (canon 60s napoleon would have done it I'm sorry)- but what I kept was the pretty "badly" shot pics of random things, tho you sometimes get the odd decent pic taken by Illya. And he gets to be in a duck floatie as a treat and nod to oss <3

• Pinned post is because it became frustrating for him having to respond to people asking him if it was his real name or if he was a far right french man simping for Bonaparte

• first post is not a ref, but if my very sexy flat car was burning in the desert I would take a pic (ft Illya despairing) kdkdkd

• Duck floatie is a oss117 ref

• selfie with a beautiful woman (ft his finger), no ref I just love drawing women

• also Fiddlesticks for the cute Napoleon fox !! And to kinda link the two profiles :)

• and finaly Spy with my face ! He tried taking a picture of his date (I'll let you decide who it was), but oops front facing camera kdkdkdk

Can you tell I had a lot of fun doing this ? I love this show way to much omfg

PS : if you've never seen the recent oss117 movies, you should they funny ! But oh god some jokes are terrible- the first one is the best, minus one gay joke frankly not great. They nail the gay joke in the second one but oh god... They do not always win the 'is our character a piece of shit or is the movie problematic' gamble so be aware of that. And the 3rd one is shit don't bother

PPS : I don't use Tiktok, I tried my best to emulate the feeling of it but be aware I have no idea what I'm doing dkkdld

[fbfh]

curiosity is a wonderful thing - ch 8

wc: 3.1k

genre: slowburn, friends to lovers, fluff

pairing: audrey x ben, mal x ben????, eventual ben x daughter of alice!reader

warnings: audrey being a lil bitch again, mind control/hypnosis magic, implanted thoughts, minor emotional manipulation from mal

summary: disappointed again by Audrey's motivations, Ben prepares for a huge tourney match. But something - or someone - becomes very distracting all of a sudden.

song recs: the king - sarah kinsley, mind control - topsecret, do it for her - steven universe soundtrack

a/n: so we took in a stray cat (orange ofc) and he literally did this to me the other day???? peak orange cat behavior tbh. not my pic if that wasn't obvious

TAGS @yesv01 @magcon7280 @hopefullhearts @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @sunshineangel-reads @dustyinkpages @inejsknifes @tulipmagnoliaisme @ev3ningrain

“So, where’s bunny?” Audrey asks Ben as they head to the tourney field. She says his nickname for you with a note of venom. Even though it rarely happens, whenever someone else refers to you as bunny it always hits Ben’s ear wrong. 

“She’s probably just running late,” Ben says, “nothing out of the ordinary.” 

He says it sweetly. You three were supposed to meet up before the match today, but Ben figures you probably took a wrong turn, or got tied up in a project. Ben covers for you like that a lot. He doesn't mind at all, and since he can't go with you to Wonderland, he feels like this is the next best thing. Or the least he can do, he supposes.

“Well great, that's…” Audrey starts, trailing off as she gets distracted by a group of girls. More specifically, by how amazing their hair is. She tries to pay attention to what Ben is going on about this time, but their hair… it’s too distracting. It looks photoshopped. It looks like the hair they use in salon ads and shampoo commercials. She glares at them, her gaze venomous until she realizes her eyebrows are all scrunched up. She snaps out of it, smoothing out her face. First not just one person with better hair than her, but multiple girls with hair so much better than hers that she’s going to get wrinkles over it? What’s next, mixing patterns? Unblended eyeshadow? Orthopedic shoes?

“Do you think they actually paid for those?” She spits conspiratorially.

“D- uh, they- they might have…” Ben sputters at the sudden change of topic, following her gaze and trying to figure out what exactly has got Audrey in such a bad mood suddenly. 

“She did it to Jane’s hair too,” Audrey continues in that tone she only gets when spreading gossip. “And Fairy Godmother’s not happy about it.”

Oh. She’s talking about their hair. 

The realization dawns on Ben, and he takes a closer look at the group of girls. The girl on the left’s new color and style remind him a lot of yours. It looks good. Ben glances back at Audrey, realizing she’s this upset over someone else’s hair.

“I mean… what’s the harm?” Ben starts gently. From what you’ve told him about Mal and Evie, Mal is probably just trying to make friends with the makeup and fashion tips she’s picked up from Evie - and as far as Ben’s concerned, that’s something that should be encouraged. Before he can finish his thought, Audrey interjects, as she so often does when the conversation isn’t about her.

“It’s gateway magic!” She exclaims incredulously, as if this should be obvious to him. 

Gateway magic? That’s… not a thing… Ben thinks, wondering for a fraction of a second if Audrey might be joking. The only reason that magic is retired in the first place is because of the technology boom that came from Auradon’s alliance with Atlantis. All the new technology can do pretty much anything magic can do in people’s day to day lives. 

Aside from that, it’s also much easier to regulate and add in safety precautions. Most people have become more interested in exploring and expanding new technologies than focusing on magic and its traditions. Ben has a feeling that in the coming years, magic will eventually begin to be re-incorporated into society, but for now, it’s somewhat obsolete. Technology is easier to learn, gets more consistent results, and you don’t need to dig through ancient texts for information - one quick Doogle search and you’re good to go. 

“I mean, sure, it starts with the hair.” Audrey continues, and Ben can sense a tangent coming. “Next thing you know it’s the lips, then the legs, then the clothes, and then everybody looks so good, and…”

As he listens, Ben starts to see her point. If using magic to alter the way you look becomes common, it could have dire consequences. Adolescence is a fragile time, and if cosmetic alterations start running rampant at Auradon Prep, who knows how detrimental that could be to the student body’s self image and self esteem? The last thing Ben wants is to contribute to misogynistic, unrealistic beauty standards, give young girls even more unattainable ideologies to compare themselves to. 

He’s sure Mal is well intentioned with all this makeover stuff, and he doesn’t want to punish her for efforts to make friends - solve one problem by causing another. If he can just talk to her, have a heart to heart and explain why he’s concerned, he’s sure she’ll understand. That way they can collaborate, come up with a solution for how Mal can make friends without doing anything that could inadvertently create a negative aftermath. 

“...Then where will I be?” 

Audrey’s voice breaks Ben’s momentary, spiraling train of thought. He looks at her as she pouts, fussing with her own hair. She pulls out a compact mirror and begins inspecting her face. The realization that Audrey is only worried about herself yet again sends a flash of disappointment through him. Maybe if things were different he could talk to her about it, maybe he could get her to understand. But he still has a tourney game to get ready for, a meeting with his parents after that, and a new potential crisis to put out. 

“Listen, Audrey-”

Either she doesn’t hear him, or she doesn’t want to, and cuts him off again - something Ben starts to realize he’s growing very used to. She snaps her compact shut and looks at him vaguely, digging around her bag for her plumping lip gloss. She makes a mental note to get more, the extreme plumping kind if she wants to get ahead of all this magic beauty bullshit on the horizon.

“I will see you after my dress fitting for coronation, ‘kay?”

“O-Okay…” Ben replies, but Audrey is already bounding away.

“Bye bennyboo.” She calls out behind her, leaving Ben alone in the hall. He feels himself cringe a little at her repeated use of the nicknam, but reprimands himself. It’s well intentioned - well enough at least - so he shouldn’t be judgemental. 

Behind him in the empty hall, Mal stands, staring at the back of Ben’s head intently. She steadies herself with a breath. She’s been practicing on the birds outside her window - she even practiced on Carlos a few times - she’s been pouring over her mom’s spellbook nonstop since yesterday, she’s ready. She has to be. She takes a breath and walks forward, clearing her throat. 

“Hey bennyboo!” She says, sarcastic and saccharine. 

Ben turns around, startled by the sound of Mal’s voice, and bites back a sigh. He really wishes people would just call him Ben. Before he can greet her, Mal takes a few steps closer, locking eyes with him, and holds up a baggie of cookies that look very… homemade. 

“Do you want one?”

He looks at the cookies briefly, then smiles at Mal. It seems a little strange that she would take up something like baking when she refuses to even take an art class, but Ben is too distracted by the fact that she’s finally putting a good foot forward. She’s doing something kind, making a gesture, she’s trying.

“Oh,” he chuckles, smiling and trying to find a polite way to decline. He never eats right before a tourney match, especially dessert. 

“I uh,” he starts, fumbling for words that always come so easily. “I’ve got a big game - I don’t eat before a big game, but thank you so much!” He adds quickly, her eyes locked onto his. Have they always been that green? 

“T-thank you. Next time, next time definitely.” He concludes. He should go. He needs to go warm up or he’s going to be late. Why is he still standing there?

“No, yeah.” Mal says, pulling his thoughts back to her. If her eyes had always been so intense, such a vibrant, glowing green, Ben is sure he would have noticed before. “I completely understand.”

Mal smiles sadly. 

“Be wary of treats offered by villains…” She laughs sadly, eyes still locked on his, drawing him in. “I’m sure every kid in Auradon knows that.” 

Panic and guilt flash through him. 

“No, no, no-” He fumbles, trying to explain, but finding the words feels like trying to run through quicksand. He can feel his brain slowing down, struggling to think, growing more and more quiet. 

“No, that’s not it,” he sputters, desperately trying to correct her impression of him, that he doesn’t trust her, doesn’t like her. “I- I really do-” 

He gestures weakly toward the tourney field, eyes still locked on Mal’s, stuck in her entrancing gaze. Everything around him seems to glow with a tinge of that green, that intoxicating emerald color of her eyes. He tries to say something, but there are no words in his head to draw on. It’s like someone cut the power supply to his mind, leaving him reeling in the dark, stuck in place as Mal stares him down, inching closer to him. He can’t think, can’t blink, can’t move. All he can do is watch the shades of green emanating from Mal’s eyes, casting everything around him in emerald and lime and harlequin. He wishes he could say something, then slipping into the back of his mind like a snake, words begin to form. 

Everything you say and do makes everyone believe you’re wildly in love with me. Even yourself. 

Everything you say and do makes everyone believe you’re wildly in love with me. Even yourself.  

“No, I get it.” Mal says out loud, sounding just like the strange orders permeating Ben’s mind. “You’re cautious, that’s smart.” 

Everything you say and do makes everyone believe you’re wildly in love with me. Even yourself.

“Oh well,” Mal sighs, “more for me I guess…”

Everything you say and do makes everyone believe you’re wildly in love with me. Even yourself. 

She holds up her sugary concoction between them. 

Everything you say and do makes everyone believe you’re wildly in love with me. Even yourself. 

Ben steps forward.

Everything you say and do makes everyone believe you’re wildly in love with me. Even yourself. 

He reaches out his hand, compelled by her, then hesitates.

Everything you say and do makes everyone believe you’re wildly in love with me. Even yourself. 

“Eat the cookie, Ben.” Mal says, her melodic voice sounding just the same out loud as it does echoing around his head. 

Everything you say and do makes everyone believe you’re wildly in love with me. Even yourself. 

“Eat it!” She snaps. Ben reaches out automatically, taking a bite. The glow in Mal’s eyes softens, a glint of that green still reflected in Ben’s, and he blinks, trying to come out of this strange stupor. 

“See?” He replies hazily. “I totally trust you. Totally.” 

Mal smirks. She glances over at her friends, who Ben didn’t even notice. Mal looks back at Ben. 

“...How are they?” She asks tentatively. Her heart pounds uncontrollably in her chest. This is the moment of truth. She can feel Evie and Jay and Carlos all holding their breath, right along with her. 

“They’re good, they’re great.” Ben answers quickly. “They’re amazing! They’re, uh…”

A warm, fizzy feeling fills his mouth, trickling down his throat as he swallows. 

“I mean, they’re warm, and chewy, and-” he sputters mindlessly. That addictive, bubbling, fizzy feeling spreads from his throat to his chest, making him feel all hazy and disoriented. “And, you know, they…”

He trails off for a moment. That warm, itchy fizzing feeling begins bubbling in his stomach, spreading throughout the rest of his body. 

“Is that walnuts?” He blurts out, continuing to ramble mindlessly about the cookies. “I love walnuts.”

She knows that, comes Mal’s voice in his mind again, she must know that. That’s why she put them in there. God, she’s so beautiful, and considerate too. Always thinking about other people before herself…

“And, um, you know, the chocolate… the- the chocolate…” he sputters. “The chocolate chips are… uh…”

The earth seems to move around him, absolving him of all his duties, all his responsibilities and obligations besides pleasing her. 

“Sorry. They’re, uh… they’re warm, and soft, and sweet…” He rambles, describing the angel before him more than the cookies. His breathing gets shallow as he subconsciously steps closer, needing her like he needs air. He’s fixating on her again, aching for another hit of that intoxicating look she had trapped him in.

“Mal, have you always had those little golden flecks in your eyes?” He murmurs, voice more low and intimate as he gazes down at her. He’s looking at her differently than he had been - that much is obvious. He reaches up to take another bite of the cookie and she gasps, grabbing it from him.

“I think that’s enough for now…” She says. Ben chuckles, his gaze unwavering. She’s so considerate, always looking out for him in little ways that no one else does. His pupils dilate as he stares at her, overwhelmed by a sense of familiarity, comfort. A strange, aged brew of feelings rises up through him. It makes him think of something, remind him of someone, but he can’t put his finger on it… He’s so wrapped up in the sensation that he doesn’t even notice Jay standing behind him until he speaks, placing his hands firmly - and somewhat roughly - on Ben’s shoulders.

“How you feeling, bro?” Jay asks. There’s a knowing element, a note of some inside information shared between Jay and his friends within his words, but it goes right over Ben’s head. Everything in his mind is screaming Mal Mal Mal! You want to be around Mal as much as possible! She’s your whole world, and you’re totally obsessed with her! 

“I feel… I- I feel…” Ben murmurs, eyes still locked on Mal’s as he tries to find the words, struggling to put his finger on it. A dreamy smile crosses his face.

“I feel like singing your name-”

Mal’s eyes widen in fear and she moves forward, clamping her hand over Ben’s mouth before he can even think about actually doing it. He wasn’t going to, but he smiles into her palm as he realizes she thought he was serious. 

“Okay, well,” Mal says softly with a nervous chuckle. They’re attracting too much attention like this already, and she knows they have to move on if they want a chance at pulling this off. “Don’t do that.”

Ben takes in a deep breath, and the scent of worn, grungy leather and spray paint fumes invades his senses. There’s something else too… nail polish? It’s intoxicating coming from her skin, dizzying, and he wants more. He takes her hand in his, holding it tenderly and inspecting it closely for a moment, his eyes fixated on her bitten nails. They glint in the afternoon light, reflecting off the sparkly, cracked mixture of purple and green polish. Just like her eyes. He looks up at her so softly, and it makes her feel sick. 

“When did you do this?” He asks, glancing back at her nail polish, his thumbs tenderly grazing over her fingers and knuckles. 

“Um-” Mal starts. She’s uncomfortable. She’s not used to having this much attention unless she’s getting screamed at or is knee deep in a gang fight. She’s… unsure of what to do with Ben looking at her like that. He continues before she can try to figure out a response.

“It looks really good, it… it suits you…” He says wistfully, staring at her hand and wanting so badly to kiss it. He looks back up at Mal, and the intensity in his eyes, in his body language makes her waver for a moment. She looks over Ben’s shoulder at Jay, silently begging to bail her out. Jay bites back a laugh at the sight of big bad Mal squirming when someone shows interest in her, but he nods anyway. 

“We gotta go, we have a big tourney match to get ready for.” Jay says, playfully shaking Ben’s shoulders in hopes of snapping him out of his stupor. It doesn’t work, but he hears what Jay is saying anyway. “Right Carlos?”

Carlos blinks, walking closer to help drag Ben away. 

“Uh, right. See you later, Mal.” He says, shooting Mal a thumbs up, silently congratulating her on pulling off such a complicated, difficult spell. Ben feels his heart plummet as Jay pulls him away, Mal’s hand slipping out of his. He twists around in Jay’s grip, struggling to not let her out of his sight yet. You can’t leave her yet, you can’t! 

“You’ll- you’ll be at the tourney match, right Mal?” He asks, a distinct note of desperation reaching for her as he speaks. 

“Yup.” She answers with a performative smile, skin crawling at all the attention he’s throwing at her. “I’ll be the one in purple.”

She mutters the last part under her breath, muscle memory kicking in as she deflects her unexpected discomfort with verbal jabs. She doesn’t think anyone will hear her remark, much less acknowledge it if they do, but she flinches a little as Ben laughs loudly. “I’ll see you there.” He says, beaming at her. Mal can’t remember the last time she made someone laugh out of anything other than fear. 

“I’ll see you right after.” 

He repeats it desperately, like a prayer. Like he’s trying to convince himself that the pain of being apart from her will be over soon. A cold sweat breaks out on the back of Mal’s neck. She grabs Evie’s arm, desperate for some sense of comfort, and walks away as quick as she can without breaking out into a full blown sprint. 

Jay and Carlos attempt to drag Ben away, a little surprised at how hard he’s fighting to look back at Mal every few seconds. Eventually, after a lot of squirming at talking out loud about how great she is, how pretty her eyes are, isn’t she just the best, they manage to get Ben to the tourney field to get ready for the match. Ben stumbles through his usual routine when getting ready for a match, his head swimming the entire time. He’s completely preoccupied with thoughts of Mal. Soon it’s time to head out onto the field, and it couldn’t come sooner. 

Mal is out there, waiting for him, and he is not going to let her down. He calls out morale boosting chants with the rest of the team, psyching himself up to lead his team to victory, because Mal is going to be up in the stands watching him. He’s going to break records, play the best game of tourney in history for her. Everything he does is for her.

[preemshots]

oc smash or pass

tagged by @theloverstemperance tagging ANYONE who wants to do this but hasn't yet. please tag me as the person who tagged you so i can read about your OC :D rules: pretty self explanatory. include physical descriptions or pics, and propaganda. the “other” label can be used for “sexuality misalignment” (ie: oc is femme and you’re gay, vice versa or you aren’t into smashing but a specific thing you wanna do with them like perhaps hug or study them under a microscope idc).

BASICS

Full Name: NV ("nut v". i never picked a real full name, but it's also not valerie or vincent lmao) Nickname: V Age: 27 in 2077 Height: 5'10" Eyes: Black Kiroshi "The Oracle" with red emissive pupil UI Gender: nonbinary Pronouns: they/she; masc>femme nouns Sexuality: yeah. (bi/pan/queer/poly all of the above)

PROS

obvious: NV is outwardly reserved and focused most of the time; brow furrowed, slight resting grump face. but they're also terrible at hiding what they're feeling and it's easy to break this focus. if they like you, they'll react strongly to you--usually with snark, bold suggestions, or by getting flustered.

dependable sucker: prefers to serve others before self, and once making a choice follows through with it (even if they know they'll regret it or have been deceived).

observant: pays attention to every detail of everything they can, will randomly give you the most thoughtful gift or something you mentioned needing/wanting but forgot about.

enduring: can tolerate a lot--physically, mentally, emotionally, even without certainty of reward at the end.

switch: their dynamic depends on the person, but generally are top-leaning. they are just as eager to struggle for dominance as they are to be put in their place.

work hard, play hard mentality: they overwork to justify seeking pleasure and good times, believing strongly in indulgent treats and blowing off steam--and most importantly, treating others.

1TB SDD memory: their sense of humanity is extremely dependent upon their connections with others above all else, whether close/personal, casual/transactional, or human/AI. they will not forget you.

cybernetically enhanced: stronger than average, but they're made of mostly doll parts, so you know. pleasure enhancements are included >:3

CONS

thrill seeker: they constantly want to test the limits of their cybernetic body in ridiculous ways--whether with new, dangerous drugs, by jumping off buildings in corpo plaza, or watching hacked BDs. their cybernetics aren't even particularly strong; they deliberately choose cheap/basic models and are more than willing to blow money on repairs/replacement parts.

rat: refuses to buy food unless it's for others. they'll openly steal food off tables as they pass by random people dining on the street to get the very limited caloric intake they need. if that fails, they'll even eat something off the ground if it doesn't look too gross.

deeply unwell: it's not just the creepy look of the kiroshis; years of cybernetic replacements have eroded NV's sense of humanity. while there's no risk of a full blown cyberpsychotic breakdown, a sort of gnawing omnipresent craving for violence lives inside them, something they consistently indulge in on a small scale via work when the opportunity presents itself. though it's not enough to motivate their decisions, they do enjoy the excuse.

the fool: their sense of identity is largely defined by choice and the guilt that follows. nudging them into misguided choices is not particularly difficult.

indifferent reaper: they are acutely aware of the nature of merc work, how often they're required to pass judgement on behalf of others whom they may not agree with, as well as how often they are given the unique opportunity to pass life-or-death judgement themselves. but even when executing something they feel is right, they don't really believe in greater moral justice, only luck and bad luck.

feral: the relic and johnny's influence prevent further decay of their humanity but also exacerbate a tendency to overindulge in all their vices. they WILL get themselves into trouble.

narrow viewpoint: particularly focused on individual survival, they don't often examine the larger picture (of corps, society, long-term manipulation, etc.)

EXTRAS

former nomad who loves cars and driving around. they are either the best driver (on the clock) or the scariest (off the clock the thrill seeking mentality kicks in, no thoughts head empty, my insurance will cover this, etc.)

utility netrunner: very skilled but only uses it for doing spooky shit, never direct attacks.

throwing knife user. likes to pounce on their prey and abuse finishers.

also a failed arasaka corpo who loves bullying other corpos but is absolutely embarassed about being a failed corpo. it is not hard to see why they were bad at it.

smoker.

eager to follow a leader but generally suspicious of organized groups that recruit. indiscriminately hazes every ganger in night city, will beat their asses for fun and then sell their guns back to them

more propaganda under the cut (warning for slight spice 🌶)

[bookqueenrules]

Coda, Coda, Coda-DD Episode 4

In this post, I asked TDers to be on the look out for the Easter Egg that's not really an Easter Egg which Gimple mentioned on the NYCC panel. It was unclear if he was saying it was in episode 4 or not, but if he did mean episode 4, he was clearly referring to the Coda symbols in this is episode. For a reference as what a Coda is and how it is connected to Beth and her return, here is a wonderful post by @twdmusicboxmystery

I found two coda symbols in the episode. Please let me know if anyone found others. Interestingly, there are other TD related symbols above each of the codas.

In the garage with Theo and the other older gentleman, I don't remember his name, the coda symbol is clearly reflected on the top of the car.

The fact that this coda symbol is literally a reflection on a CAR is like a neon sign for TDers. If Beth did survive by being left in a car, either in the backseat or the trunk, putting the coda symbol on the car would be a clear sign that Beth was "resurrected" from the car as TD believes. Above it is a car sign for a brand of car, these cars no longer sold in North American, with a Chevron pattern like the one in the gray sweater Beth wore during Coda.

Next, there is the coda painted on pillars at the Nest. Soon after Isabelle's Coda-like death, this appears clearly in the shot behind Losang. Above the coda is a compass rose. I won't go over the compass rose symbolism as many other TDers have written about it for years.

So what do these codas mean? If this is the "mythology" Gimple is referring to, why is he calling it out? We know he uses symbols of all kinds in every episode. So, why call out this symbol now? The obvious answer is that the episode is the second Coda and now we will be going back to the first coda and Beth will return. Another NYCC tidbit is that right before the question that elicited Gimple's "Easter Egg" response was a question about crossovers and cameos. Gimple and Zabel looked at each other, laughed, and Zabel said that they are working on something right now.

By the end of season one and now throughout season two of DD, they have clearly repeated parts seasons 4 and 5. Based on this, below is my conjecture as to when Beth will return.

There may be post credits scene that airs after the cable broadcast of 2x6 where we see that Beth is alive like we saw Morgan after 5x8 Coda.

2. It could mean that we are in middle of a replay, but the replay isn't complete. I did a post explaining how we have seen a replay of 5x01, 5x02, and 5x03 here. However, knowing how the rest of the season goes, I don't think we have seen the replay of these episodes yet.

Honestly, as disappointing as it may be, I think season 3 will be about replaying some of these episode before we get Beth.

I'll post more about it later, but we already have a S3 spoiler that during a celebration a military like vehicle pulls up. Then, a man was heard yelling, "They kidnapped my daughter." I believe they were filming episode 2. So, @galadrieljones I believe you were correct about the kidnapping. It's not Laurent but a new character in Spain. Assuming D and C go after the girl, and I am sure they will, that episode may be the replay of Consumed and/or Crossed.

Another confirmation from S3 spoilers is the train connection. Trains are mentioned strangely in a couple of places in episode 4 as @twdmusicboxmystery pointed out in her video. She predicted that we would see a train soon. Guess what? A BTS picture was posted of a yellow(the color of reunion) train being filmed in Spain.

I'll post all the BTS pics I have as soon as S2 is over. I mention all the things TD has been and continues to be right about to show that we should not be too upset if she doesn't show at the end of season 2. She will show soon. Judging by the replays, she will show by the end of season 3 at the latest. Hang in there! In the mean time, Bethyl has the BEST fanfiction writers to keep us entertained!

TD is right. All the signs and symbols point to Beth's return. She will return. Unfortunately, TPTB are not in as a much of hurry to get there as we are.

[fairyofshampgyu]

i love himbo ! gyu so much tbh like it's brainrotting me ngl 💔

I ONLY JUST SAW THIS NOW FOR SOME REASON SORRY BUT OMFG YES HIMBO GYU 😩😩😩 I think about him all the time especially after your himbo gyu headcanons you really brainrotted me hard 😪 everything you said was so true bro ‼️No but that picture you used as your header always reminded me of frat boy himbo gyu as well like !!😩 so now i think we need to talk about himbo gyu more or I’ll explode.

Okay but also look at these pictures like he also looks like a frat boy himbo here hsfhfjdh

Anyway himbo ! gyu being so damn obvious with his crush on you whilst thinking he’s subtle but every time you’re in the room he’s staring at you like a hawk and not paying attention to a single thing his friends are saying, his friends asking him a question but he’s completely zoned out daydreaming of you lmao and yet he’s also so oblivious to your crush on him somehow when you’ve been straight out FLIRTING w him he just doesn’t seem to get it 😭

Gyu when you guys finally start dating being the clingiest bf ever he’s literally like a golden retriever or a lovesick puppy for you like he’s so down bad and once he’s finally forced you to cuddle him at the most unconventional times, he literally will not let you leave him for hours whining so loudly if you let go 🙄🙄

Complaining when you do work and never doing his own, luring you in by promising ‘study dates’ and that he will fr study this time but he won’t shut up talking about random shit and distracts you sm and asks for like 50 kisses 15 minutes into the session

ALSO HES SUCH A PERVVV and he’s such a thigh and ass man omg he will not leave them alone but bc he’s so dumb for them, you can use it to your advantage and tease him so bad 😌 like one time he’s just walking on campus and you run up to him and hug him and say hi then do a little twirl in a extremely short skirt or revealing outfit and bro has already malfunctioned and gotten hard 😪 begging you both to just skip class and go back to your dorm to which you dramatically gasp at like “you’re such a perv beomgyu omg.. !🫢😰🤨🤨 I’m just wearing a cute nice innocent outfit tf”

When that was literally your devious 😈 plan all along LMFAO TO TORTURE HIM AND GO CRAZY OVER YOU

He’s begging and pleading so bad but you force him to go to his class and he’s texting you in his class as soon as he’s in there saying he can’t focus bc all he can think of is you but he never focuses in class anyway 🙄

So you send him a few innocent pics in his lecture 🤭… maybe of your skirt ridden up a bit, plush thighs on full display and your panties

HE GOES INSANE, sending you keyboard smashes and saying he’s “fr DYING rnaBAJFKDJ<$*) STOP DONT DO THIS TO ME Y/N HSJFJ IM GOING TO DIE AND EXPLODE” he’s literally so painfully hard in his lecture lmfao but you tell him to pay attention

When his class finally ends he practically pounces on you dragging you to his dorm 😭 and now you’ll have to care of the mess you made of him, fucking your baby so dumb <3

Beomie’s got a big cock but dumb baby doesn’t know how to use it himself you have to help him :( so pretty but can’t use his pretty little head of his all the time

Call him a dumb puppy and he’ll literally whimper and cum in his pants right there he loves it sm, pull on your dumb puppy’s hair as well

Yes, he’s a bit ditzy but he’s def not dumb when it comes to eating you out though like you said, he could literally stay there forever and he’s so pussy drunk for u, pretty lips and tongue so good at fucking you and sucking your clit, big dumb pretty eyes looking up at you, he’s always begging you to sit on his face like he loves eating you out whilst you sit on his face and gripping on your plush thighs as he whimpers and whines underneath you it’s literally his favourite thing

Pretty but no brains or maybe he just puts the act on a lot more just bc he knows how much you like it and go crazy when he doesn’t know what to do and looks at you with his dumb puppy eyes, he’ll use it to his advantage as well to get what he wants, he’s still a major spoilt brat 😒

[seelestars]

hellooo, if u dont mind could i request himeko, kafka and fu xuan reacting to their s/o being a highly talented dancer and seeing them dance to a really hard kpop choreo? thanks and have a wonderful day/night :D

➴ ✫ * ✧ HSR WOMEN SEEING YOU DANCE TO A K-POP SONG ! (kafka, fu xuan, himeko)

a/n : i can smell how this post is gonna flop from miles away but i digress ���️ anywaay i tried my best, hope u enjoyyy! + slightly ooc fu xuan ?

kafka :

might snap a few pics of you shamelessly while you’re dancing, a smug smirk on her lips as you hear the shuttering sound of her phone. (It’s def gonna be her wallpaper)

no matter how hard you try she won’t delete it😭😭she thinks you look pretty in the pictures she took, so why delete them?

or option B, she stands there watching you, seeing how long it takes for you to notice she’s there… whole jumpscare when you finally notice her (she likes doing it to see your cute startled reactions)

she’ll hum along to the lyrics of the song, maybe even lay her hands on your body as you danced. (it makes u immediately freeze up, a flustered expression on your face as she chuckles next to your ear)

she tells u things like, “with those skills, you could be an idol. im sure you’d be a very good one though, with your looks and all~” with a stupid smile on her lips

if you do decide to teach her one of the dances, she’d catch on very quickly.. she’s quite a quick learner ! except she purposefully messes up sometimes so u can adjust her posture etc (she just wants to feel ur touch on her skin ♡)

fu xuan :

is wowed by your impressive dance moves (but she doesn’t admit it “h-hmph, I’ve seen better.”) , she knew you were a good dancer but she had never rlly seen u dance before

she’s stuck in a trance watching you to the point she doesn’t even realize you’ve finished dancing and how you were currently staring at her. her cheeks flush as soon as she snaps back to reality as she turns her head away, crossing her arms. when you tease her about it, she’d only deny “i-i wasn’t staring at you!” even tho it’s insanely obvious she was

she probs has some toxic trait thinking she can also easily do that dance, getting all cocky w u and going “watch me do the dance better!” and proceeding to have to replay the vid a thousand times (except it’s no use, she’s still so confused <\3) she gets so embarrassed afterwards to the point u have to comfort her and let her know it’s okay ,,

she thought the dance u did was mesmerizing, and rlly wants to master it. so she reluctantly asks you for tips (with the tips of her ears flushed red hehe) in a way that makes u want to tease her about it

secretly tries to sneak up on u more to watch you dance more (you notice this but don’t point it out since yk how embarrassed she’d be)

himeko :

she heard loud music coming from your room, so she decided to check on you only to see u dancing to kpop songs lol

she’d make her presence known by clapping, her eyes slightly widened by how in awe she was of your skills !

might even start singing the songs (even if she’s unfamiliar w the lyrics) n dance along w u,,

or she’d most likely just sit somewhere and wait for u to finish before interrupting and stuff, her gaze fixed on you the entire time… she just thinks you look too good while dancing to take her eyes off of you! an approving look on her face as she stares you down intently, even though ur getting flustered by how much she’s staring </3

when u finish dancing to the songs, she’ll ask you for tutorials so she can dance along with you !! she’s also gonna give you tons of compliments, “you did so well” “you looked beautiful” “that’s so impressive” but as soon as you give her a tutorial she’s gonna be so confused haha ,, must be bcuz of her lack of experience when it comes to dancing..

she’s very supportive of whatever you do, if you decide to start a career w your dancing skills she’d cheer you on !

[disaster-whore]

introduction & info

hey! you can call me d (haha) or disaster, whatever you'd like. this is a side account for me to be shamlessly horny.

i follow & like from de******d***e <3

needless to say this is an 18+ blog and minors should not interact, ageless/under 18 will be blocked :3

DNI: minors (obvs), zoos, pedos, any kind of bigot etc. all the obvious stuff. also feederism blogs (nothing wrong with feederism as long as you're being safe, just a personal preference)

info: 19yrs, 5'6"-5'7", chubby/fat, trans man, he/him, 10 months on t, pre-op, t4t, currently ID as a gay man, taken <3

not open to partners/play partners/sexting

here's my linktree where you can find all of my socials!

more info abt me & this blog:

i'm a vers switch!

> i prefer bottoming like 99% of the time, just because i really like penetration. but dom/sub is pretty 50/50 :3

bdsm test results from 10/01/24:

100% Switch

98% Rope bunny

94% Rigger

92% Submissive

92% Degradee

91% Dominant

87% Exhibitionist

87% Degrader

79% Brat tamer

77% Brat

68% Experimentalist

64% Owner

63% Non-monogamist

59% Masochist

59% Pet

53% Voyeur

48% Sadist

44% Master/Mistress

44% Primal (Prey)

37% Slave

30% Vanilla

28% Primal (Hunter)

0% Ageplayer

0% Daddy/Mommy

0% Little

likes! (non exhaustive)-

lingerie (wearing/partner wearing)

degredation (specifically slut shaming, dom or sub)

praise (dom or sub)

bondage & shibari (rigger or bunny)

biting/marking/possesiveness (dom or sub)

exhibitionism (feel free to ask for pics! and please tell me if my blog made you horny/wet/hard or if you got off to my pics!)

puppyplay/light pet play (dom/owner, maybe sub)

monsterfucking (i esp. love werewolves and minotaurs >.<)

free use (sub, maybe dom)

CNC*

somno (sub only)

intox (sub only)

hard nos (there isn't anything wrong with these kinks!! just not for me <3) -

pregnancy/breeding

detrans/misgendering

forcemasc (makes me dysphoric as a gnc guy </3)

watersports

scat

gore

ageplay

fauxcest

feeding/weightgain/etc

anal (for now)

preffered terms for genetalia:

tdick, tcock, cock, dick, cunt, pussy, boycunt, boypussy, hole(s) <3

tags: #disaskter for asks, #horny text for horny/kinky text posts, #soft text for non-kinky text posts about cuddling and whatnot, #my pics for photos & videos of me, #personal is usually for random non-horny rambles, #d's art for my artwork, and i'm gonna be tagging posts about my boyfriend as #r :3

if you're just here to get off (which is epic, i love people getting off to me), you may want to block #vent

anons: 🐻, 🪦

[strawbrygashez]

ALL THE TIMES DUDE HAS BEEN SUGGESTED/ALLUDED TO NOT BE STRAIGHT!!!!!!!! Feel free to add or correct me if I get something wrong!

First I will start off with things RWS has said themselves and the most obvious example of Dude basically being confirmed to be NOT STRAIGHT. This is from the official Running with scissors Twitter!

And here is a post from the RWS tumblr where they reblogged a post and added this comment

Just in general if RWS or Destructive Creations comments under Nottemdude fanart it’s always more than likely them being positive about it. The RWS tumblr hasn’t been active in 7 years so it’s not just a ‘new’ thing also. I would post more pics of these times but there is a image limit to posts so unless someone wants me to show specific examples….😐 But anyways, they have alluded to adding Nottem to Postal under a piece of nottemdude fanart before if I’m remembering correctly. They also support Dude being shipped with Duke Nukem as well, having retweeted ship art of Duke/Nottem/Dude. Also there is fanart of Nottemdude and just other works where he’s seen being 🏳️‍🌈 or just wearing all kinds of different pride flags on their offical website on the fanart page. And if you take all of this as them being cool about it (fanart and ships) and not minding it and being a ‘good sport about it’ then okay. Sure. But to say that RWS doesn’t encourage or support it would be veryyyy odd.

Before I get into my list of a couple moments Dude is alluded to being bi, I wanna add that If you wanna get technical, the Postal Dude according to RWS can be ‘anything you want him to be’ so while he might not have a totally confirmed sexuality yet or hasn’t been seen being with a man, he is more than likely never gonna be confirmed as straight and if you headcanon Dude being anything other than bi then that’s fine but the baseline seems to be that he’s into both men and woman.

Anyways, here is some moments that come to mind for me.

————————————————————————•In postal 2, You are able to let him kiss another man at the kissing booth on Valentine’s Day

•Most of Dudes dialogue to the other Dude in Brain damage has a flirty tone to it. Dearie & handsome are words Dude uses to refer to the other him. (Which sure, you could say he’s just flirting with himself but be fr for a moment. You wouldn’t be like 🤨 if you heard a man irl calling a clone of himself ‘dearie’?? And the tone Dude uses to tell him not to go and to come back???)

•In postal 4, one of the first things you do is write a sign in hopes to find work. No matter what you choose to write Dude adds something along the lines about being willing to ‘do dirty work’ with men. HE SAYS TO MALE NPCS THAT THEY CAN TAKE HIM BACK TO THEIR PLACE!!! How much more obvious-

•His whole thing with the drag outfit in postal 4. He really didn’t have to wear that if he didn’t want to or really felt uncomfortable with it. Wearing drag doesn’t make someone a certain sexuality but I just wanted to add this part because some people still view Dude as this manly man or this guy who sticks to only stereotypically masculine things?? When he wears drag, makeup & high heels.

•In postal brain damaged, there is a place in his mind specially for Doomguy. And not just in a “ohhh hes so cool and manly 🤩” way..there is full on pictures of his bare ass in Dudes brain. Why would a straight man have a secret part in his brain saved for another man’s ass????

•In BD again, there is a scene where in Dudes dream, buff men are standing behind him set up in a meme reference, suggesting that Dude is about to have sex with them all. Here is the pic 🫡

(And would you look at that. He’s smiling!)

•Lots of d*ldo jokes in postal 4 and BD. A used one is seen on his floor in the opening cutscene for BD. (Again you can just say it’s for the laughs besides the used one but why would a straight man own that many?)

•Dude says “it’s like taking it up the bum” in BD…how would u know how that feels like sir? 🤨

•In postal 2, Postal 3 Dude uses a certain kinda…tone and way of taking sometimes with p2. For example the “Short tempered today, are we?” line. Im sorry but that is such a oddly flirty teasing way of talking to another man. Also p3 Dude felt the need to remind p2 that he wore ‘skin tight leather’ and maybe it would rejog his memory wearing it again.

•In postal 4, dude has a line saying something about how no one has it harder than a “white cis man”. What’s interesting to me is that he didn’t throw in that he’s straight too. You’d think he would do to the nature of that sentence.

•Postal 3 dude is oddly insecure about his masculinity and or is not confident in his sexuality. He’s worried about being seen as gay just for riding some kinda scooter and hopes none of his friends sees him like that. I dunno to me I feel like people perceive Dude as a ‘no fucks given’ kinda guy but he’s whining and complaining about riding some scooter.

[grapecaseschoices]

OC in 15: Kendis Crawford-Louel

rules: share 15 or fewer lines of dialogue from an OC, ideally lines that capture the character/personality/vibe of the OC. Bonus points for just using dialogue without other details about the scene, but you're free to include those as well!

I was tagged by @deepinifhell and am woefully delayed in getting on this.

Tagging: @thedeadthree @thee-morrigan @nat-seal-well @nightingalesighs @laufire @lusavors @cypresswrites @thelittlestspider @mt07131 @roxaro @quaxorascal @tuomniia @andthatisnotfake @sunshineandviolets @sapphic-story [tagged fifteen peeps! i think! and as always no pressure!]

Most of the dialogue from old rp stuff repurposed for this meme, some from unposted stuff, and a few I made up for this. (As warning: some cussing)

-----

1] However, strangeness of the situation proves that the metal gates aren’t fully down around the castle, because she bites out, bluntly, “No! No. I’m not okay.” Her breath hitches. “Don’t. D-don’t follow that up with another question. I thought we talked about this.”

By ‘we’ and ‘talked’, she meant the time she summarily shut down his last attempt to dig deeper. It should’ve been obvious by now that Kendis didn’t like accepting what they insisted on dishing out.

-

2] "Yook, Kenny, yook!"

"What'm I lookin' at, teeny tyke? --- Well, now. Look at that! Is that me? In fact, I know that's me. That's the second prettiest person in this entire art of prettiness. And is the one right next to me you? It's got to be 'cause that's definitely the prettiest person in this."

"You siwwy, Kenny. Boys not be pretty!"

"Am I? Well, if you're sayin' that's right then I'll consider it. But being silly doesn't mean I'm wrooooong~. Boys can be very pretty, kiddo. People can be whatever they wanna be so long as they're --- kind, yeah? And you're the kindest, prettiest, most talented teeny tyke, I've ever known. Oh, now you're laughin' at me, huh? Well, Ima show you 'bout that teeny brat."

-

3] "Who invented white allosexuals, like for real? Someone return this woman to sender."

-

4] "We're not even four days into a fucking New Year and this shit stain is stinkin' up the place."

-

5] "And I get that it's different things for different people. But I rather lose a place, than lose the people that matter with it."

-

6] "I know you've probs been lied to lately. But you're really not cute."

-

7] "He obvi picked bad pics on purpose, you Italian booger."

-

8] "I'm like Siri. Except better looking, smarter, much louder, and not an AI slave to a hegemonic hell-hole that stole the name of one of the best fruits. Like ever."

-

9] "Um, excuse you. I'm not reckless. What 'bout me screams the self sacrifice type?"

-

10] "Hey. Hey! Look at me! That's it ... slow breaths. I've got you. Do you -- you're okay, slowly ... Do you remember what I told you last week? Just nod. I've got you. I've got ya. You remember this? That's my pinky. We pinky promised -- the biggest and most bindable way to lock in a promise, yeah? And you may not know this about me, but I don't make promises that I can't see through. I said you're gonna be okay. And I mean that. I'm gonna make it happen, okay? I'll -- I'm here now and I'll be there at the end. Prommy, prommy, prommy, prommy, pro -- oh, a laugh, huh? Ha. That's what I like hearing. Leave the worryin' to me, dude."

-

11] "If this human version of a mutated ingrown armpit hair follicle don't get up off my face in the next 10, 9, 8, 7, …."

-

12] “Ow! Fudging snowcaps! That bitch hur –” They stopped mid-yelling but simply began complaining underneath their breath.

-

13] "I'm --," Kendis gestured sharply with their right hand as if orchestrating their feelings or encouraging Morgan to jump in. Not that they gave her much of a chance when they quickly added, "You know."

"You're?" Morgan smirked, "You know? I don't think I do."

"Yes. You do."

"Nah, nothing's ringing a bell."

"Well, that's probably all the brain damage you got from the last fight."

"Right. I remember that. The fight where I got stabbed instead of you."

Kendis' nostrils flare and their jaw clenches so tightly Morgan almost feels a sympathy twinge in her own teeth.

-

14]

“Then why won’t you tell me you love me? Maybe a little reward so I can be brave?”

“‘Cause a face full of kisses wasn’t enough? Wow.”

“Sure,  it was nice but this is a big deal. I think I deserve a bigger reward.”

“Aren’t rewards for after you actually do the stuff?”

“You’re right. How about you say ‘I love you’ just because you do!”

“You look cute when you pout an’ you’re gonna be late.”

“Please, Kendis? We’ve been dating for a while now and … That is – Unless – You don’t.”

“I don’t what?”

“You know you are always avoiding it, saying how you feel about me, and you’ve never come close to saying the words .. and sometimes I’ve wondered … I’ve been very patient the last several months –”

“Then keep on with that.”

“Okay. Okay. Kendis. Do you love me?”

“Can we talk about this later? This ain’t as black an’ white as you’re making it look like.”

“But it is.  It is a very black and white question with a very black and white answer. Do you love me?”

“Austyn. Austyn? Stop that! What’re you doin’?  Don’t. You’re – fuckin’ –”

“These are the notes I wrote you. Look at them. Look how far they reach on your floor. Look!”

“No”

“You never even wrote it back. I kept saying it and writing it and you never gave anything back … B-because … because you don’t.”

“I never gave – We’re not doin’ this right now. Again. Why’re you doin’ this right now? We don’t even have the time to really get into -”

“What is there to get into?  It’s yes or no,  Kendis! If you say that, then it will be all settled.”

“Maybe stop cuttin’ me off an’ let me speak.”

“You cut me off first! And don’t you start raising your voice at me!”

“You started that shit first, yourself! What is with you?”

“Why are you acting like I am overreacting? I’m not! It isn’t wrong to want to know whether or not my best friend is in love with me. It isn’t wrong to know if you really see a future with us together or if you’ve been just tagging along because I’m one of the very few other out girls in school.”

“You called me your best friend.”

“What?” 

“You should know how I feel. You say I don’t give you nothin’ back but that’s a damn lie an’ you know it.”

“Then why don’t you say it? I say it all the time!”

“But are you really meanin’ it?”

“Uh - Wha – EXCUSE ME!?!!” 

“Are you? How can I say those words to someone that's not a sure thing? You talk a lot about a future that ain’t here but what you really got to say for the now.”

“Wow. Asshole.” 

“Takes one.”

“Fine. Don’t love me. I think it’s best if we take some space right now and reconsider our priorities.”

“Austyn. I didn’t mean – Austyn this is silly.”’

“Is it?”

“Why're we even doin’ this right now? What about the formal?” 

“Don’t call me unless I call you.”

“Austyn!”

“Don’t.”

“You know what? Fuck you.”

“Apparently not even in the next few months, asshole.”

-

15]

Kendis narrowed her eyes but forced herself to take a deep breath, “You. Bumped into. Me!” Honestly, that was a generous and kind assessment. If Kendis had been human, she doubted she would’ve been able to stand with only a headache and a bad mood to show for it.

“Yeah, because you slowed down when you weren’t supposed to! I was keeping pace with you, speeding by the way, and then allva sudden –”

“I know you’re not blaming me for any of this, let alone your speeding, you Stranger Things reject.”

“Excuse me?”

Kendis felt that anger again – no, they could almost taste it. It was just wafting off the air from the shifter in front of them. It was churning up their stomach like sick, this anger that wasn’t their rage.

It was restless, like her’s was, but was also too hard, too cold.

Not right, not right. The warning blared in Kendis’ gut. Something was off and they needed to leave.

“Don’t!” They warned when the person reached out to grab at them, clearly making Kendis ready to skedaddle. The sharp yell struck out like a roll of thunder, loud and final enough to make this person hesitate, before Kendis’ voice dropped into a growl, “Don’t. Touch. Me.” [x]

[aquatark]

kind of randomly spurred post, but i was just wondering how many endless ocean fans knew about the development screenshots we have of the first game... so i figured i'd share them with you all, along with some light analysis for those interested in this game's development history!

so the development photos i'll be going into in this post were revealed to the public in 2014-2015, shared on the twitter account of ichiro mihara, the vice president of arika and series producer of the endless ocean games! nowadays, he mostly just posts food pics and pokemon go stuff... kinda living the dream ngl

below is the complete set of screenshots:

the most obvious difference here to most players would be creatures placed where they shouldn't be, such as the yellow boxfish in an atypical zoom, and the presence of false clown anemonefish in the abyss and ship's rest. while the boxfish photo i don't have any explanation for other than the creature moving around a little at some point in development, the anemonefish photos i have a more interesting explanation for!

we can use these photos, along with multiple other photos of clownfish in eo1 zooms taken during development (which are used on the plaques of eo2's aquarium), to deduce that this clownfish species was used as a test creature for zoom environments! i mean, it's pretty obvious they weren't intending for you to actually find clownfish in the depths... and due to their order in the game's internal d code life system, we can assume they were among the first zoom mode creatures to be added. it all lines up! though i'm glad the little guys don't have to suffer that insane water pressure anymore...

now, another big difference is the lack of water fog in most of these photos! it's especially obvious in the photos taken in zoom mode that this portion of the game had yet to be figured out at the point those photos were taken. for comparison, here's the yellow boxfish photo compared with a photo of the same staghorn coral zoom in the final game:

big difference, huh? this fog would be even stronger if i weren't using an emulator to take my photos - dolphin tends to skimp a little on the fog. but, this lines up with what we know about this game's development: during a post-release developer interview (which you can view translated into english here), they mentioned struggling to make this fog feel right - more oceanic than foggy feeling, and accurately changing with the player's current depth - and these photos illustrate that there was a time where fog in zoom mode spots was neglected entirely!

the screenshot of the open encyclopedia also has a lot of interesting differences from the final game. take a look here, comparing the same page:

(note that of course, the development photo was taken in japanese, while my screenshot is in english: "fish who live in the ocean" is actually what the deep sea section is called in the final japanese release... trust me, i checked)

so obviously, the layout of these pages is completely different! i imagine the details on these small fish would have been barely legible on the average person's tv at the time, so making them bigger was a good call. additionally, the encyclopedia used to be navigated using arrow buttons and a back button to exit! this back button is completely unused in the final game, probably just because it's redundant when in the final game, you can just press the b button to go back. three other small changes are that:

in the dev screenshot, the encyclopedia's page background is just a texture, as opposed to a 3d model as seen in the final game. this means it's likely the pages didn't flip like a real book does at this point.

the scientific names of the giant squid and the oarfish was altered.

there are no page numbers in the encyclopedia.

now, for a quick lightning round of smaller changes!

in the final game, there is only one place to find remoras: accompanied by the whale shark in entryway slope, in small numbers. this contrasts with the whale shark photo, in which way more remoras are seen surrounding it, and in an area deeper than entryway slope allows. since this photo was also an old promotional image, and we have footage of the game from previews around the same time, the most plausible explanation is that this whale shark was placed in the game's unused test stage (which i should also make a post about at some point lol).

the penguin photo was taken with an angle impossible in the final game, as was the polar bear photo and the starck's demoiselle photo.

also in the penguin photo, there are two hatches typically present on the deck of the gabbiano (one on either side of the mast), that are absent.

the water surrounding the gabbiano in the polar bear photo is a different color than in the final game.

the starck's demoiselle photo has a bright cyan water color in the background, which is never visible in the final game without camera hacks.

finally, one fun fact regarding the starck's demoiselle photo: it's actually used in-game, both in this game and in the sequel! in eo1, it can be found occasionally placed in the fake magazine spreads sent to the player for a C grade photo request, and in eo2, it is the photo used to represent "DIVING MAGAZINE" when viewing photo requests!

that's all of my rambling for now, i hope you found this interesting! if this kind of longpost is something you'd like to see more of in the future, let me know! i've got all sorts of topics in the chamber that i just need an excuse to write about lol

[ingravinoveritas]

impalationship replied to your post "| NTAs red carpet 2021 vs. Pride of Britain red…”

I've been in a fandom for quite some time now where there used to be a fan who was a professional body language expert. They taught us a lot about what to look for in photos like this and I have to say it's clear as day that M and AL can barely tolerate being near each other while M and D are exhibiting signs of strong physical and emotional closeness and attraction. Who knows what goes on in their lives behind closed doors but this is what we can see from all of these pics and videos.

rainbowposes replied to your post "New red carpet pics and ugh what is wrong with..."

Anna especially looks so uncomfortable. As a couple they never look quite right. The age difference for one looks too pronounced. Michael looks like her father! I know they have two daughters but I still really can't see them going the distance. Anna's dress is gorgeous, though, and she looks stunning. Their vibes are just so off though. I can only really say that here. In most SM places you get slaughtered for any Anna negativity. Same with Georgia!😳

@impalationship Oh, wow. That is very interesting, and I appreciate you sharing those observations about Michael and AL vs. Michael and David. I think many of us have wondered what a body language professional would have to say about their body language, and so I am wondering if this expert has ever shared anything about "tells" (i.e., small gestures or signs that give away what a person is truly feeling). If so, would you be able to share those/what sort of "tells" you think Michael and David are giving off? I know deciphering subtle body language cues has never been my forte, so your insights are certainly fascinating.

To your comment, @rainbowposes, I agree with you about the vibes between Michael and AL being off. I've said this previously, but for me it's never been about the age gap (although I find that the legitimitiate criticisms many of us have are decried and often chalked up solely to that). It's the "everything else" gap that is so noticeable, IMO. It's that Michael and AL have nothing in common except for the kids. It's that neither one of them "lights up" around the other, and that the normally ever-present twinkle in Michael's eye disappears when he is with her. I'm genuinely at a loss for how Anna in particular seems so uncomfortable holding her own boyfriend's hand and looks like she would rather be anywhere and doing anything else instead. I'm also floored at the disconnect happening with the fans on Twitter saying how happy they both look, as at this point it seems like willfully ignoring everything that is actually happening in those pictures.

I'm glad you felt comfortable sharing your thoughts here, though. Going by the sheer volume of comments on both of these posts, a lot of other people feel similarly. Truthfully, I've never seen this many comments of people speaking honestly about what they are seeing in the last four years. I'm not sure what exactly has caused the change, except that what's plainly obvious apparently can no longer be overlooked. So interesting...