#not knowing he can understand everything
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was talking with a friend about how some of dunmeshi fаndom misunderstands kabru's initial feelings towards laios.
to sum up kabru's situation via a self-contained modernized metaphor:
kabru is like a guy who lost his entire family in a highly traumatic car accident. years later he joins a discord server and takes note of laios, another server member who seems interesting, so they start chatting. then laios reveals his special interest and favorite movie of all time is David Cronenberg's Crash (1996), and invites kabru to go watch a demolition derby with him
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#kabru#kabru already added laios as a discord friend. everyone else in the server can see laios excitedly asking kabru to go with him#what would You even Do in this situation. how would YOU feel?#basically: kabru isnt a laios-hater! hes just in shock bc Thats His Trauma. the key part is kabru still says yes#bc he wants to get to know laios. to understand why laios would be so fascinated by something horrific to him#and ALSO bc even while in shock kabru can still tell laios has unique expertise + knowledge that Could be used for Good#even if kabru doesnt fully trust laios yet (bc kabru just started talking to the guy 2 hours ago. they barely know each other)#kabru also understands that getting to know ppl (esp laios) means having to get to know their passions. even if it triggers his trauma here#but thats too much to fit in this metaphor/analogy. this is NOT an AU! its not supposed to cover everything abt kabru or laios' character!#its a self-contained metaphor written Specifically to be more easily relatable+thus easy to understand for general ppl online#(ie. assumed discord users. hence why i said (a non-specific) 'discord server' and not something specific like 'car repair subreddit')#its for ppl who mightve not fully grasped kabru's character+intentions and think hes being mean/'chaotic'/murderous.#to place ppl in kabru's shoes in an emotionally similar situation thats more possible/grounded in irl experiences and contexts.#and also for the movie punchline#mynn.txt#dm text#crossposting my tweets onto here since my friends suggested so
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I've been brewing this post for far too long in my drafts, but I need more doomed!Bruce and Jason throughout universes. And it is not even always about the same Jaybin, dying in the warehouse scenarios!
Sometimes Jason is just a kid, who died in front of Batman, who maybe jumped in between Batman and the villain recklessly, to keep him safe, and whose blood stuck under Bruce's nails. His face haunts him in nightmares, still.
In other realities, Bruce meets Jason as a teen, and they never even get to become father and son officially - but they slowly get into each other's lives, until something awful happens, leaving a ghost of a smirking kid stroll behind Bruce's hunched figure for the rest of his life.
Or maybe it is one of these realities, where Jason crawls out of the Alley Crime himself, and manages to become famous in Gotham; the one, where he opens a charity fond, dedicated to people, who fight with the drug addiction. Bruce Wayne is sympathetic of a kid he meets during some of the events, and as they slowly start contacting each other more often, getting closer, he promises himself to protect him. Expect, Batman is late to save Jason Todd from the hands of yet another villain.
It could be the priest Jason Todd that meets bleeding out Batman on the stairs of the church, and who helps him out, for what he later pays with his life. Or they are not really vigilantes in any of these universes - just father and son.
And in some of these universes, they reconcile. In one of them, some of the medics connect the dots that a catatonic boy, who is covered in dirt, calling for his dad, for Bruce is Bruce's Wayne dead son, and try calling him. In another, LoA!Jason with his memory still being in a haze, crosses his path with Batman, before getting dipped in the Lazarus Pit.
But the point stands.
In all of them, Bruce Wayne is too late. In all of them, Bruce Wayne fails to save Jason Todd.
#i actually have a specific scenario in my head#basically early 20tish Jason who works as a bartender in Alley Crime#and Bruce (still Batman) who never picked up anyone after Dick#but his relationship with Dick is still strained#they try to mend things but more often than not they can't find a common ground#Bruce once visits this bar where Jason works too tired and mourning his parents that day and Jason amuses him#Jason not instantly understands Bruce is Wayne until he leaves him tips higher than 1k dollars lol#Bruce starts visit more#Jason shares his lore a little - he was picked up by the owner of the bar as a kid#they talk about books and about the fact that Jason saves money for college#Bruce helps him out ofc#he invites him to meet Alfred and Dick#everything is okay#and then... Joker happens#he takes Jason as a hostage bc he figures out that Batman knows the boy#Jason atp knows that Bruce is Batman but never confronts him about it#this time Batman comes in time#Jason tries to kill Joker but Batman stops him#so Jason doesn't kill him#they hug#and when they hug Joker shots Jason#of course Batman blames himself lmao#he might or might not fail to keep himself in check and kills Joker after this#but he instantly leaves his cowl behind because he can't allow himself to live with what happened#if you want a happy ending red hood can return in the same manner as in canon but without beefing bruce ofc#jason todd#bruce wayne#red hood#batman
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Being a batfam fan is funny because people will make a post like “here’s my headcanon-“ and it’s just something that’s directly canon to the story then post about major canon events and get everything wrong.
#this post was inspired by me remembering the experience of reading death in the family#after only knowing the fanbase version and realizing oh none of that shit happened okay#like girl you don’t understand it’s so bad#Jason wasn’t even fired as Robin#He’s not accused of murdering anyone by Bruce#He’s not trying to prove himself at all he’s just looking for his mom#The reason Bruce didn’t go after him right away is because he was tracking down a goddamn nuke the Joker stole#Then after he finds it and handles the problem he helps Jason track down moms 2 and 3#Also Jason died in like 20 minutes?? even less??#He died in less time than it took his mother to smoke a cigarette#Bruce literally went ‘wait here I’ll be right back’ and was gone for less time than a trip to the grocery store#and then you go into the Jason Todd tag and they act like Bruce pulled the damn trigger on him#Like besties I don’t know how to tell you this he basically did everything right he possibly could have#Even him benching Jason from Robin temporarily happens so that he can get Jason into therapy about his trauma#Like the whole point is that neither of them did anything wrong bad shit just sometimes happens#That’s the tragedy. The drama.#Bruce couldn’t have made better choices in the position he was in and Jason was never going to make different ones#It was inevitable#Anyway rant over please read death in the family before I lose my mind#batfam#batman#jason todd#tim drake#dick grayson#damian wayne#bruce wayne
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swipes everything else off of the table to yell about diasomnia flower bookmarks
(I gave Silver one too :D)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#white rabbit festival#me: oh boy i wonder what excitement will happen in this new part#characters: now it is time to buy souvenirs :)#me: oh god#jk jk even when the filler is kind of painful i do enjoy the little character moments#like everyone screaming as loud as they can into silver's watch#deuce busting out his suzy izzard impression#SMASH IT WITH A HAMMER!#and of course silver assigning flowers to the other dias and getting all sappy over lilia. god. delicious.#you don't understand this ten second long scene is everything to me#though we all know the real highlight#the knowledge that 1) deuce used to have an extremely silly edgy badass nickname#2) he almost certainly gave it to himself#3) he harassed epel's extended family to the point that they told horror stories about him and he was briefly epel's personal idol#epel: i heard he once killed three men with but a look#deuce: what no i never...i mean...ha ha sounds weird nothing a model student like me would know about#also deuce: if you fuckers don't apologize to my mom right now i'll fucking kill all of you (sees dilla) uhhh i mean#deuce: i challenge you to a children's game#black bunnies leader: (strapping on his duel disk) i accept#meanwhile silver is running full speed at a group of children screaming to them about donuts#we aren't going to talk about what ortho did with that fantasy-gregg's sausage roll#so glad that we've reached the 'what the heck is even happening' portion of the event#anyway i completely screwed up the resolution of these so here's hoping they don't look terrible!#whoops!
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I think a lot about Leo standing up for his brothers in the things that really matter to them.
Like- Leo is the one who immediately pushes Mikey and Donnie into finding Raph the second it’s clear that their oldest brother is missing because he knows Raph can’t handle being separated like that.
Leo is the one who stands up for Mikey when Mikey wants to go on a solo mission, actively vouching for him and being the one to convince Raph into letting Mikey go, because being independent and proving himself just as capable of standing on his own two feet as everyone else means so much to Mikey.
And Leo defends Donnie’s honor in particular when his brothers’ intelligence is insulted because Leo is well aware of how important Donnie’s smarts are to him - and how important having those smarts valued and acknowledged is as well.
All this goes right into just how well Leo knows his brothers. For as much as he’ll tease or fight with them, he knows them, and he loves them.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rottmnt headcanons#rise leo#listen Leo loves his family SO MUCH#and like it’s no accident that Leo is consistently the one to give pep talks that#very notably#are less ‘everyone as a group’ and more ‘all of you individually’#it’s heartening to see honestly and like#it works with how he is as both a person and as a fighter#he knows people he knows them so well he knows how they work what they’re like#which is SO USEFUL for subterfuge AND portal/teleportation strategy#my guy is charming his charisma comes from his understanding of people at an individual level#when he wants to be he is very very good at that#he’s still a teen who is too cocky for his own good at times but that does not negate his stellar other moments#he can be selfish he can be mean he can be rude but when push comes to shove he is so quick to stand up for his family#Mikey’s statement at the end of the movie about how Leo NEVER gave up on THEM is so important because it’s not JUST about the movie!!#that’s Leo as a whole he will never give up on his bros#portal jacked is telling of this too because although it has a lot of comedic moments#never once does Leo stop looking for a way to get his bros back#they’re everything to him#he’s the face man he’s a people person and he’s the number 1 pet turtle which I will discuss the implications of in this essay-#Will also say that when Leo does these moments of standing up for his bros he’s never expecting praise for it#he’s just glad they find Raph he just smiles when Mikey tells him he loves him he never mentions defending Donnie#leo has a tendency to show off fancy glittery moves but his real actions and feelings are sooo much more lowkey#that you have to be actively looking for them to catch them all#and I really really like that about him it’s so interesting HE is so interesting
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When I tell you I have been thinking about this for three days straight...
#there's almost no hesitation there in dao#he says it like it's the most obvious thing in the world#he wholeheartedly believes it would be The Right Thing#but in dai even after everything...#no matter what stage the relationship is at#GAH#I know this is like the bare minimum but FUCK#it gives me feels okay#I believe he wouldn't be able to do it#I mean I say that as someone with an abomination inquisitor but like#if you eavesdrop on courier convos you can experience him befriending Cole in real time so#I feel like he's at that stage where he's slowly understanding that everything he's been fed was a lie#and he has trouble re-contextualising his worldview to fit that new reality#especially with all the shit he's been involved in#dragon age#cullen rutherford
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In your Spitfire AU, since Zuko is looking after Lu Ten II, what happened to Ursa?
Zuko is slightly older in the Spitfire AU. He was banished at fifteen, his head a little clearer and denial a little weaker than in canon. After his first look through the Air Temples, Zuko decides that if he can't find a myth, he might as well search for the next best thing.
Finding Ursa isn't easy, but in time he makes it to a secluded house in a near-forgotten part of the world. His mom is there, older and stronger and alive.
But she isn't alone.
And Zuko, as it turns out, didn't keep the best company during his search.
When Ursa is discovered and her secrets are laid bare for assassins (for Ozai) to find, she begs Zuko to take his little brother and run. She'll do anything it takes to protect her children, even if that means leaving them behind to keep a target off their back. Ursa diverts attention from them and allows Lu Ten's ancestry to be kept a secret. She orders Zuko not to follow her again, and disappears.
Zuko is left with a little three-year-old brother to raise and a mother he cannot hold onto.
#dema answers#atla#spitfire#Spitfire AU#prince zuko#atla ursa#Lu Ten II#The Ursa/Hakoda parallels are going to be insane in this one I swear#It's okay tho#It's absolutely intentional#(The other option was killing her. But I happen to find family conflict and abandonment issues way more compelling to write)#Luckily Zuko isn't alone. He's a mess of course—and raising the little brother you never knew you had isn't easy.#But he has Uncle and (once those loyal to his father have been taken care of) he also has his crew.#Look three years into the future and you've got a six-year-old Spitfire running around the ship and giving Zuko early gray hair#Ursa will be reunited with them in the future. I just don't know when would that happen yet.#Probably post-war#She returns to her children only to come face to face with their overprotective found family (aka the Gaang)#Their reunion would be quite messy at first but...it'll all be okay#They all love each other deeply. And sometimes love isn't enough. Sometimes there are things that you can't forgive or forget.#But Ursa did everything she did because she loved them. And Zuko knows that. Zuko understands that.#(He was forced to make the same decision in Ba Sing Se—giving yourself up and leaving the people you love behind so that they're safe)#(He understands)#But Lu Ten II doesn't#He doesn't remember Ursa. Not really. He knows of her what Zuko and Uncle tell him. But he doesn't remember ever having a mother.#(Tara is soft and warm and kind to him. She holds him and takes care of him and makes sure he's well-behaved. And he loves her.)#(Is that what makes a mother? Or is it the blood you share?)#Ursa isn't much like Tara. But she loves him dearly—there's a reason he has the name of someone who was so dear to her.#She is Lu Ten's mother. Zuko's mother. Uncle's sister.#And she isn't like Tara. But she loves him even if he can't remember her.#So maybe he can learn to love her back.
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mmmmm danny with sensory issues both in and out of his ghost forms, but on the opposite ends of the spectrum. Ghosts can't experience sensations the same way humans can when they're in the mortal realm. They're naturally intangible, and it takes energy to be physical. When they're physical, all touch feels the same barring the texture. They feel no heat, no chill. Sunlight passes through them, and so does wind and rain.
You know when your foot falls asleep/goes completely numb, and you go to touch it with your hand and it causes a strange jumble of sensations? You can feel the skin there, your palm is pressing against an object and there's resistance, pressure, but you can't feel the heat? It's kinda something like that. Like he's feeling everything through a set of gloves.
As a ghost, when it rains, he can feel the raindrops hitting him, and he can feel his hair getting wet, but he can't feel the chill of the water and he can't feel the wetness. His suit is soaked but there's no weight like there should be. During the winter snowflakes don't melt when they land on him, and he can't feel the chill of the snow when he gets buried under it.
Sunlight passes through him, a nice breeze ruffles his hair but there's no relief in the sensation. All pressure, no sensation. It's like a strange form of sensory deprivation. And of course, the internal things. It's even worse when he's intangible, when he's not putting energy into being physical. He doesn't feel real.
As human, things become too much. Especially when he's been a ghost for hours. He can feel the weight of his ribs pressing against his ribs, he becomes hyperaware of the expanding of his lungs when he breathes, the feeling of his heart pulsing in his chest.
He curls his fingers in and out slowly and becomes fascinated by the feeling of the joints moving. He turns and grabs Tucker's hand, and soaks in the warmth of his body heat -- he can't feel it as a ghost. He runs his fingers through his hair, and he can feel the individual strands.
There's a weight when he walks. A small drag when he bends his knee and lifts his leg and takes a step, and when he's been a ghost for too long he stumbles over himself, drags his feet along the floor and stomps when he doesn't mean to because he forgot to weigh his steps. Sometimes when it rains he goes out and sits on the front steps of the house just so he can come back in shivering and soaked through to the bone. Runs his fingers obsessively over the goosebumps up along his arms and legs because he can't get them as a ghost even if he's cold.
Because there are certain things, even when he's in the ghost zone, that are exclusive to the living. The little internal things you don't notice and take for granted. Things like breathing and goosebumps and exhaustion exclusive to running that makes your heart pound against your ribcage and your chest hurt with the need for air. Sore muscles from working out and sweating. Thirst and dry mouths, chapped lips and hands, blinking and dry eye, the feeling of the sun soaking into your skin on a nice summer's day.
As a ghost, Danny faces sensory issues in the form of not enough. When he can't feel the hair behind his ears or the weight in his limbs where there should be muscle, tissue, and bone. He can't feel the sun or the wind, everything is in a permeable state of 'just fine', and its maddening. He can breathe if he wants, but there's no point to it. He has no lungs, he can't feel them expand, and there's no relief behind it. He's going through the motions without any of the reward.
On those days, the idea of going ghost again makes him feel ill. Paranoid. He can't stand the thought. He needs to feel. He needs to feel the soft texture of the rug beneath his feet and the grooves in his knuckles, he needs to feel dirt crumble beneath his fingers and get stuck under his nails, he needs to feel the heat of his sister's hand and the feeling of body warmth passing from her to him. He lays on the carpet room and stretches out, and focuses on the feeling of his heart beating and the weight of his bones and muscles and tissue pinning him to the floor.
As a human, Danny faces sensory issues of too much. When all the things he's starving for suddenly make him sick. He feels trapped in his own skin. His ribs become a cage and breathing becomes a dumbbell that he can't put down. He can feel the hair along his arms and it rashes him. He's too cold, he's too hot. He feels like a ghost puppeteering its own corpse and he needs out.
On those days, Danny dips away when he can and goes ghost, and Sam and Tucker don't see him for the rest of the day. He's gone invisible, intangible, and he does nothing but exist.
Just, him experiencing sensory issues as both ghost and human, but in opposite directions from each other. And the idea that ghosts experience the mortal realm differently, and that there are certain things that are just exclusive sensations for the living that Danny doesn't realize until he's a halfa.
#danny fenton is not the ghost king#danny fenton#danny phantom#dp ghost headcanons#dp headcanons#dpxdc#danny phantom headcanon#<- bc i originally thought of this for the blood blossom au except its generic enough of a headcanon that it also works as a standalone#but also i think dpxdc folks would get a kick out of this#but yeah danny realizing that there's SO much that the living have and experience that ghosts don't even in the infinite realms.#i imagine that when he overshadows someone he can re-experience a handful of those sensations like if he were living and suddenly#he understands really well why there are some ghosts who come thru the portal that almost exclusively overshadow people. Or try to.#The mock feeling of being alive again must be *addicting* to some of them. Because he knows it is for him when being a ghost is too much#not a lot of extra tags today folks i got everything i needed to say out into the post :]
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in season 6 we BETTER fucking get argos and chat noir interactions
also this raises a question ive had for like a while, if you have the peacock miraculous its been shown you can sense if something/someone is an amok or a sentimonster
obviously argos is aware of himself, adrien, and kagami
but would he be able to sense chat noir? does having a miraculous on affect it? is agros going to feel the need to investigate first before striaght uo telling him (how adrien finds out) argos trying to find who else gabriel gave the peacock to, (he doesnt care if he finds out who chat noir is)
PLEASE??? CAN WE GET LIKE AN ANSWER???
#please please pleaseeee#are they gonna just dodge it if he can sense chat noir??#like please no i need their interactions#i understand if argos doenst tell him right away#again boy is a investigator he needs to know everything#he needs all the knowledge#but like...#still that sets up a interesting plot point or whatever#are they just gonna say having a miraculous on affects it so he actually *cant* sense him?#hrm...#miraculous ladybug#miraculous#adrien agreste#miraculous lb#ladybug and chat noir#chat noir#mlb#ml#felix graham de vanily#argos ml#sentimonster adrien agreste#sentimonster#mlb season 6#miraculous season 6
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sellllllll it's meeeeee. hehehehehehehehehhehe
so for ur writing exercises.... deku + light? please? pretty please?
:3c
heheh heheh hehe niku. this will be the death of me. me writing izuku for the first time 🥲 i will only do this for you </3
contains: established relationship, spoilers for the end of the manga, aged up deku but sometime in between the final outcome (he doesn't get the h*** s*** from bakugo yet), mentions of sex and scars
deku + light
izuku only sleeps with the lights off.
it isn't uncommon; many people you know can't sleep with even just a sliver of light turned on somewhere in the room. but the difference with izuku, you learn, is not that he's unable to stand the light―it's that he refuses to.
you quickly pick up on it the first few times he sleeps over.
he fidgets in bed, pretty badly, actually. the nightlight you sleep with glows a warm yellow, illuminating the side of your face and coating him in its afterglow. you chalk it up to nerves, how he pulls at his sleeves and adjusts his position constantly; he is, after all, one of the most anxious people you know.
and this relationship―it's new. heck, even you feel a little jittery with his arm wrapped around you.
the rhythmic tapping on your hip only increases pace. you don't think he realizes it, so your hand gently reaches for his, intertwining your fingers as you turn around in his arms.
he's close, nearly touching you nose-to-nose; the proximity leaves you fuzzy, a little ticklish, so you giggle, a soft "oops," as the freckles dusting his face almost glisten under the warm light.
"hi," you whisper, meeting his eyes; they stare back at you wide in surprise, "can't sleep?"
he looks almost guilty at your question, as if you’ve caught him with the one thing he's been trying to keep from you.
"just—" his voice comes out louder than intended, prompting him to chuckle nervously as he readjusts his volume, "just winding down, sorry."
you inch closer, nuzzling his nose lightly, "it's okay."
"did i wake you?" he asks, cheeks flushing pink as his eyebrows furrow in immediate concern. his expression is something caught between stifling a grin and feeling sorry.
you shake your head against the pillow you share, strands of your hair tangling with his. "just winding down," you tease, watching as his gaze turns softer, eyelids drooping heavier.
sometimes, you think, izuku holds the world in his eyes―a deep, dark green, the color of life. most times, they look at you with wonderment, bright and alive; photos from inko tell you they're the eyes of his inner child.
on nights like this one, however, they hide a depth in them weighted by what you can only assume is time, and all that has happened to him in such a short span of it.
you try your best to understand what lies beneath them, knowing full well he'll never tell you outright what truly bothers him.
"is it the light?" you bring up, some time after laying in silence.
"hm?" he clarifies.
"do you have a hard time sleeping with the nightlight?"
his eyes widen briefly once more, as if shocked that you've caught him again. these split second reactions are ones you've learned to be attentive to when it comes to izuku.
"no," he tries to lie, but you know better as you turn to your nightstand and reach for its switch, "you don't–"
"it was hurting my eyes," you quickly make up an excuse, tucking yourself closer under his chin as you cut off his attempt to deny it again.
finding out that the light was the problem was the easy part—
you'd begun to notice much earlier on that izuku was barely rested on the nights he'd spend at your place. it was only when your old nightlight broke that you began to notice him waking up much later than you did, groggily rousing from a deep sleep.
—what was hard, was figuring out why.
at first, you suspected it was his scars.
"s-sorry, it's not—" he'd warned you, right as your hands gripped the hem of his shirt the first time you were about to have sex, "—it's not nice."
you didn't care though; you still don't care, and you've made that abundantly clear to him since. you love izuku and all his parts―all the nicks and jaggedy pieces of skin that make up who he is.
when you eventually ask him about it, with a request that he be honest with you for once, he tells you that it is and it isn't―the reason why he exclusively sleeps with the lights off, that is.
it's an odd, comforting relationship he has with his body—that he is simultaneously grateful and sorry for how its become a canvas, both painted and marred to symbolize japan’s historic last stand.
you find out the real reason when you catch him staring at his hands.
he does it often, when he thinks you aren't looking—his fists bunched up in the same way he used to watch the power of one for all course through his fingertips; the same way he used to prepare them in battle.
there’s a faraway look in his eyes that lingers, you notice—a little wistful if anything.
“do you miss it?” you finally ask. he gives you the same shocked look he does every time, as if he’s been caught with a secret he’s been trying to hide.
he’s learned a fair bit about you now, too, though—lying to you is futile when you’ve perfected reading his truth. he stares at his fists again as you take a seat beside him, moving to give you space. you rest your head on his shoulder gently, waiting.
“sometimes,” he admits, but you know it’s an understatement.
“i think about the vestiges a lot. i miss them the most, i think,” he continues, clenching his fists tightly, “i always try to reach out to them, but i guess it doesn’t work that way.”
“i… i try to replicate the right conditions every night, but…” then he lets go, stretching his fingers out wide. the scars on the surface ripple through his skin, telling its own story.
you hum, acknowledging what he means. silence sits with the two of you as you take his hand in yours, slowly unfurling his fingers until his palm reveals itself to you. it’s rough to the touch, seasoned with hard work and all that he’s been through.
“is that why you prefer the dark?” you ask softly, after some time.
it's not often that you stay up later than izuku does. when you do though, you catch him shifting in bed, moving from side-to-side. you pretend you aren't awake, but you hear him mumble their names, dwindling in volume as he dozes off to sleep.
he stares at his palm for a moment before he admits quietly, "yeah." his brows furrow as if contemplating whether to say more, but he shakes his head, dark green strands swaying to the beat of his embarrassed chuckle, "nevermind, it's silly."
"it's not."
you intertwine your fingers, sandwiching his hand between yours. a slight sheen glosses over his eyes as he tilts his head up to look at you. he draws in a breath, before it spills over.
"it's..." he finds the words, and you squeeze his hand in comfort, "it's easier to believe it was all real when the lights are out, and that maybe it can happen again."
#deku x reader#izuku x reader#midoriya x reader#bnha x reader#shotorus.workbook#it is here ! the first time ive ever written izuku ! i hope u like it niku !#idt i'll ever feel like anything i write of him will be enough but i tried !#SPOILERS FOR MANGA ENDING PLS DONT READ AHEAD#some stuff abt the blurb: i see this happening in the time between him losing ofa and before getting the suit from bakugo#so somewhere between when hes teaching#and i think its a lot of complex feelings ― he's happy he did what he had to do but is also mourning the loss of something he once had#i don't think i can ever convey that feeling fully but i hope i at least managed to touch on it here with him !#i see this as like . the period in his life where he's transitioning out of something he once knew into smth else entirely#i also hc reader to be his colleague (like a teacher or smth) but anyone closely related to the job would work !#really just someone who has a base level understanding of what he went through but doesnt know everything#which is why they're still trying to learn all these things abt him and read him better#and also why he tries to hide a lot of things from them still / is hesitant to share in fear of scaring them away smth like that !#thats all i can think of for now but ill let u know if i have other thoughts on this later on ! hehe#hope u enjoy niku !#ask#rep#ask game answered#most nervewracking experience of my LIFE writing him#stellamancer#niku.🥩
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#bangel#bangeledit#buffy summers#angel btvs#btvsedit#btvs#dailybtvs#buffysource#filmtv#do you know how important that scene is#not only is she confiding in him#but she's also sharing more of her life and he's listening and being so understanding#and then decides that while he can't give her the normal life she desperately seeks he can still provide something nonetheless#something from her past and that meant so much to her#a moment of peace where she'll forget everything for a little while#a place where she'll feel safe again#this is such a huge part of their relationship#how many other convos like this one did they have? how many other sweet gestures?#and without an agenda#it's always about her#never about him#the other dynamics involving her wish they could be this good
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SQUID GAME 2 SPOILERS!!!
I find it funny. How people are mad that Junho didn’t reveal the frontman’s identity to anyone. But I also saw a lot of reactors who said they didn’t know Player 001 was the frontman till episode 7. EVEN IF they showed Inho’s face as the frontman in the flashbacks quite a lot of times in the early episodes.
Well, I don’t blame them since I know a lot of people who’s not very good with faces. Sometimes, I’m not very good too 🤷
But imagine if Junho did show Inho’s photo to Gihun but Gihun just. couldn’t. remember 😭😭
Gihun: “You look familiar” 🤔
Inho: “what? I’m certain this is the first time we’ve seen each other.”
Gihun: “no, no… ah, i remember! You really look a lot like Detective Hwang’s brother!”
Inho: *sweating* “oh really? Ahahaha pfft, i don’t have a brother” 🙃
Gihun: “yeah yeah, he said his brother was the frontman. That couldn’t be you, Youngil.”
Inho: 🙂🙂🙂
#i know gihun would probably remember the frontman’s face.#but i just think this is hilarious 😂#but in all honesty my stance in junho not telling the frontman’s identity….#is ahm…#i can’t blame him if he didn’t want to ditch his own brother#the actor said that inho was junho’s everything#he’s so loyal to his brother that he got blinded from his responsibilities#he’s probably still delulu in his head that inho can go back home one day and they can be happy family with their mom#(is it bad if i am delulu too?)#so i kinda understand junho in some ways.#he probably still believes inho can be redeemed#so yeah let’s just wait for what s3 has in store for us!#squid game#squid game 2#squid game 2 spoilers#hwang in ho#hwang jun ho#seong gi hun
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What if I straight up didn't explain myself? What if I just said trust me on this? Would you?
#fe warriors three hopes#mercedes von martritz#miklan anschutz gautier#we really only need to clarify this is STRICTLY warriors miklan and i think ive already condemned myself but i accept it#i am very sorry but the person i usually would talk to about rare pairs has been a bit busy so i couldnt go to them to get it out that way#so art is the only way i have you have to understand its not my fault (its my fault)#did you guys know i reset the azure gleam map three times before googling the chapter where he dies to try and save him#no i dont think he deserves to be pardoned for what hes done but i liked that w3h gave him a small chance to be better FOR HIMSELF#no i dont think he should simply be forgiven for everything he did but i do like that he was given humanity and how#he was still not a good guy but damn you guys i think about that npc sometimes#who says that they admired him becoming something despite being a criminal bc if miklan can do it whats stopping them from being better ?#like that npc stuck with me a while ok#just ......... there are a lot of thoughts here that i dont think many of you care to read even in tags so ill stop now#i will say the canvas is saved as speed run to cancellation lesgo
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i yet again do NOT understand why people think that what happened to steven in future came out of nowhere. the main show beats it into the ground how fucked up all this stuff has him! just cause he ends the main show in a good place doesnt mean that everything was solved! he solved the gem stuff but not himself, that was the whole point!
like. those people show that they didnt even pay attention to the show AND they dont understand trauma. like. shut the fuck up !!!!
#my post#su#liveblogging#how do you fucking miss the whole EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED IN THE MAIN SHOW#no child or teenager should go through that!! no one should tbf but especially them#like ok fine. other shows do this stuff all the time and theres no consequences. but su was never the show to do that lol#i know im bringing up discourse from years ago but the thing is is that people STILL hold these opinions!#like. bro athena p on youtube has THE MOST JANK su opinions. she doesnt like pearl or future ? hello?#like ok whatever you dont have to like something but then she starts going into *why* and its like. bro stop talking no#yet again its just like people that say that cassandras betrayal came out of nowhere. NO IT DIDNT FUCK OFF#im so mad dude its so easy to understand this stuff for me#also trauma can absolutely wait to manifest or show its ugly head#he showed concerning behaviors in the main show but. aughhhh whateverrr whatever whatever whatever#its also that he was finally in a good calm place in future and when youre in a calm place your trauma brain goes THIS ISNT RIGHT#it gets so used to the stressful situations you were in that itll still think things are wrong even when nothing is#because it cant risk bringing its guard down in case stuff happens all over again#or some shit like that. fuck#and steven? babey hes been in stressful situations for a long time#ew why does this post have notes lol i thought itd get like 5 notes. im not opening the notes thing lmaoo fuck that
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The world if people stopped applying their understanding of "conservatism" and "religion/christianity" through a very modern, deeply American view onto Death Note (a manga from the Early-mid 2000s which is very much set in the cultural and societal context of early-mid 2000s Japan and all that entails):
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#death note#fandom wank#i just be ramblin#listen I get it there's christian imagery#it's not bad to go over what that entails and whatnot. fun even#but beyond some potential parallels and symbols you have to understand that this is a japanese story set in japan in the early-mid 2000s#(and later an imagined 'future' from there)#you are not understanding the story if you're placing the characters on a political spectrum of beliefs based on what conservatism looks#like to you#you're superimposing your personal modern experiences and your country's societal/cultural state onto Death Note and it's characters and#calling it 'a reading'#I genuinely don't know how many more times I can endure people acting like Soichiro Yagami and Teru Mikami have the exact same set of#beliefs and religion and standards as a Southern USA republican/ultra conservative super christian#Or hell. People assuming that Light Yagami can't ever be relatable because someone like Light looks to them like a teacher's wet dream of a#perfect student who is always working hard and studying#when the truth is that while Light is the top student in Japan at one point‚ everything he is doing is within the realm of expectation for#'good' Japanese students. Not exceptional or supernatural or beyond dedicated. Good.#This is a manga where the time period and the setting and society at the time are deeply important#And you will never hope to have an understanding by forcing it to conform to what 'normal' society looks like to you#relating to character's experiences can go beyond relating and end up in territory where you're superimposing your experiences onto their#fictional reality and calling it canon#edit (because people put some good tags on this post): even though I was kind of vague about it this also goes for assuming that#christianity is the only possible religion any characters could be into#the options aren't either athiesm or christianity. there are other big religions in Japan#and in the same way Christianity colors American society and experiences even for people who have never practiced‚ so goes the way society#and people's general beliefs are influenced by Japan's major religions#the person in the tags who mentioned Shinto gets a cookie
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(cw non-sexual kink, cis male tiddy sucking)
nikolai takes one look at ghost - at the stiffness he holds himself with, arms held rigidly at his sides as he glares ahead, each breath carefully measured to make himself unnoticed - and knows it’s been too long since he’s checked on his boy
all it takes is a single look, catching his bruised and tired eyes, and ghost all but slumps. nikolai turns, heading towards the 141’s private rec room and he doesn’t need to hear the near-silent footsteps to know ghost’s following. he pulls him down onto the couch, bringing him into the circle of his arms even as he weakly tries to pull away
“don’t need it, nik; don’t have time…” ghost argues but it’s hollow at best
“hush, sweet one,” he soothes his halfhearted protests and thumbs his mask up above his lips. “always so nervous; so lost...”
he tugs his shirt up, showing off his belly and the heavy swell of his hairy pecs; nipples already pebbled. he cups the back of ghost’s head, his thumb brushing over his exposed jaw and ghost is helpless to follow as he gently leads him to latch onto his breast
“i have you,” he promises
no matter how big he is, in presence or in stature, nikolai is bigger; encompassing his whole body in warmth and safety, the familiar scent of cologne and motor oil filling his senses just as the heat of his tit fills his mouth
ghost’s eyes roll back and he nuzzles deeper into his chest, sinking into him and lets his mind empty as he suckles
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soap didn’t mean to. he didn’t mean to walk in on something not meant for his eyes. he just wanted to check on ghost; he’s been so distant lately, different from his usual bad days and he doesn’t know how to help him but that doesn’t mean he isn’t going to try
but he didn’t mean for this; for guilt and a heated, confused want to chase through him as he enters the rec room and realises nikolai got to ghost first
realises they’re not just necking on the couch; that ghost’s lips are pressed tight to nikolai’s furred breast and not moving away, a gentle hollow thinning his exposed cheeks as he sucks, his throat softly bobbing as he swallows
nikolai’s cupping the back of his head, fingers drifting through the blonde hair at the nape of his neck and he looks so fond; like there’s nowhere he’d rather be than on their broken in couch with ghost curled around his body, sucking what must be a deep ache into his tit.
then nikolai looks up at him, frozen in the doorway and soap-
soap runs
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nikolai gives soap a few days before he tries to talk about it; gives him a chance to come to terms with what he's seen. it's almost adorable; how deep soap’s flush grows when he sees him, how he stumbles over his words and can’t quite make eye contact
but it also tugs at him that he feels the need to shrink, to brace himself from whatever punishment he thinks is headed his way; shoulders hunching in, arms wrapped almost defensively around his body before finding whatever excuse he can to run from him
run from himself
he wishes he could wait for soap to come to him but he knows lost boys and their fear of coming in from the cold
nikolai keeps himself gentle as he uses his bulk to corner soap; stopping him from running but also using it to show how easily he could hide in him if he just let himself give in. if he let him take care of him the same way he takes care of ghost
"but... but it's wrong," soap whispers, fingers tangling with a gold cross at the hollow of his throat (a cross so similar to one he’d melted down all those years ago), but he speaks with such clear longing; eyes wide where he stares up at him, all but begging to be told otherwise and it almost breaks nikolai's heart
"no, lovely boy," he denies softly and soap shudders as he cups his face and backs him up against the corner; hugged by both walls and nikolai himself. "there is nothing more natural."
he caresses soap's cheek. he feels him shake under his touch, his eyes already growing dewy, and chances drifting his fingers over his bottom lip. soap's breath hitches and he looks up at him with so much fear - so much trust - and hesitantly opens his mouth to let them sink inside
nikolai doesn't press them too deep, doesn't threaten his throat, but they are thick and wide; filling his mouth and comfortably weighing down his tongue
with a small, involuntary moan, soap closes his lips around his fingers and nikolai catches him with his body as he goes limp. he coos as he starts sucking; wrapping his other arm around his head and brings him into his body, hidden and safe and small
"my good, lovely boy," he whispers and soap lets out a cracked whimper. "you are not wrong."
he isn't ready yet, much the same way ghost wasn't ready at first. but feeling soap tremble and suckle at his fingers, nikolai knows he'll soon have another boy tucked safe to his breast
#soap thinking it’s wrong not bc nikolai and ghost are men (though that’s part of it)#but bc he knows the church would see it as a bastardisation of the virgin mary#the mother feeding christ; the ultimate act of care and love#and it must be a perversion; it must be a twisted imitation of something pure#right?#it cant be something genuine; pure; bc if ghost can have it… does thst mean he can too?#soap desperate for such comfort and acceptance; things he thinks he’ll never receive#bc he knows he’ll never be worthy of such things#never devout enough; never loyal enough; never well behaved enough#shaming his family and his church along with it every time he opened his mouth#he constantly chases this elusive ‘good enough’; always forced himself to be better; stronger; /perfect/#bc then it will mean he’ll have earned it right? he’ll be given the love he’s always yearned for but always fell short of#and nikolai who was raised russian orthodox? all he can see is a burnt out reflection of himself#he recognises the same longing he used to feel before he realised he will never be enough for them#that they want him to be a man he will despise and even then he’ll still be denied the comfort he wanted#and he doesnt want that; for ghost or soap#he’ll give them everything they want and more until they understand everything they deserve#we’re a team. ghost team#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#nikolaighost#nikghost#nikolai x ghost#niksoap#nikolaisoap#nikolai x soap#cod nikolai#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#john soap mactavish#soap cod
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