#not everyone by any means and it's totally okay for those who won't

[mermaidsirennikita]

always a disappointment when you're reading a romance novel and they're getting down to it and the heroine is all "oh wait I'm sorry I'm on my period" and the hero's like "oh it's okay let's cuddle :)" instead of doing this

[dcxdpdabbles]

Have you considered Danny going to Gotham for some reason or other (maybe after a reveal his parents decide to take a family vacation to bond with him), and meeting Duke.

They end up becoming friends/ crush, but Jason being undead senses something is off about him and ominous stalks them every time they do something together.

It's like that one image of the dude proposing and the dad with the sign that says SAY NO

Duke grins when Danny comes racing into the cafe, nearly tumbling into an old lady who is exiting. He does the same panic look around that he always does when he is tardy before spotting the table Duke put aside for them.

He scrambles to their table, looking frazzled and dripping wet from the rain. Duke feels his heart flutter as Danny slumps into his seat. "Duke, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to be late,"

"It's alright, Danny. You know I don't mind, how late you are. In fact you were only ten minutes late this time. It's your best time yet." Duke tells him while pushing a large Chai latte and a chocolate croissant.

Danny winces, shaking the water out of his hair. He unknowingly resembles a wet dog, but it's terribly endaring to him. "I'm so sorry. I swear it won't happen again."

"It's okay. I really don't mind" Duke assures, leaning on his hand as the other starts to nibble on his treat. He can feel his smile soften at the way Danny hums in satisfaction. "Rain caught you by suprise again?"

"Yes! I checked the weather four times this time, but it still rained!" Danny harps, pulling at his white shirt that clung to him due to the water. Duke glances down, feeling his ears burn at the slight see-through effect the water is having. "What's the point of a weather app if it never works?!"

Coughing, he hastily removes his jacket. offering it. Duke is glad he's wearing his signature yellow leather jacket, as it would be the perfect size for his friend.

He is taller and broader than Danny, but that didn't mean the other was small. He has personally seen Danny's muscular runners built, and that wasn't a night of discovery, then nothing was.

Before then, Danny had hidden his impressive physic with baggy clothes that belied the strength hidden underneath. He hadn't even meant to show it off.

Duke had been the fool who invited his new school friend to use the Wayne indoor pool and had ended up having his whole life changed. Thank goodness Danny had been so preoccupied with his siblings to notice Duke's gay panic in the deep end of the pool.

The only down side to that night- besides having a gay panic while Danny slept in the guest room- was Jason immediately clocking Danny as "bad vibe".

The Second eldest Wayne couldn't explain why Danny made him uneasy, just that he did, and he wanted Duke to stay far away from him.

As if he had any control over what Duke did.

Duke smiles, trying to keep his eyes on his friends face. He would not gawk at Danny abs. He wouldn't. "Yeah, everyone knows not to trust the weather forcast in Gotham. We figure it out by the feeling in our knees"

"Of course you do." Danny sighs, accepting the offered jacket with a crocked smile. His accent slips through his words, causing shivers to run down his spine. "I swear every day I question why I came to this city."

"Cheap rent?" Duke offers, watching Danny zip up and another flutter of his heart tells him how good Danny looks in his jacket.

"Oh yeah, it totally balances out the mugging attempts, insane villains, and sunless sky," Danny harps. He takes a sip of his coffee with a small hum. "Just the way I like it. Thanks, Duke. How much do I owe you"

"Nothing." Duke says, flushing red at Danny's raised brow. He has to swing his gaze away from those ocean eyes before he does something stupid like try to hold Danny's hand "It's on me"

Danny makes a noise in the back fo his throat. "I can't possibly let you pay for me again. How much?"

Duke opens his mouth to answer when he catches movement in the large window right behind Danny. It's Jason, dressed in a black leather jacket next to his motorcycle and holding a sign above his head.

On it, reads the message: Don't date him Duke. He has bad vibes.

The meta feels his fingers curl up on the table, scrapping the wood. He grinds his teeth as Jason very obviously waves the sign. Around him, people are throwing glances, but his brother doesn't seem to care.

Danny is saying something, but he's too busy glaring at Jason to pay attention to what it is. That's until Danny notices he isn't listening, and tries to glance over his shoulder.

"What is it?"

Duke flings himself across the table, grabbing Danny's hand and yanking him forward. He can't let his friend know he has feelings for him!

He panics when he realizes how crazy he must seem, so he blurts out. "My ex just walked in. Please don't look!"

"Oh" Danny nods settling back down. "Hate when that happens. Do you want me to pretend to be your boyfriend?"

What.

"Um, why?"

"Make her jealous....or him?" Danny says casually. So casual that Duke suspects he is not as nonchalant as he attempting to be.

His heart soars "Yeah um if you would"

Danny smiles, a red hue appearing on his face, and Duke feels his stomach drop down to his feet. It's not an unpleasant feeling.

Danny laces their fingers together on the table top, and Jason snaps the sign on his knee. Duke discreetly shoots him the finger as he stares into Danny eyes adoringly.

Maybe Jason's meddling paid off after all.

[m3talmunson]

It started with babes. Babes is completely platonic right? Nothing out of the ordinary there. Eddie was known for being over dramatic, why would nicknames -or in this case, pet names- be any different?

Babes wasn't even that over the top, so why was Steve blushing like a school girl after it was said in passing?

Steve definitely knew why, although, he was going to pretend he didn't. But he knew, about himself, about Eddie. A couple months after spring break '86 Steve had a very enlightening talk with Robin about his feelings. Towards Munson. Those completely and totally platonic feelings.

And a couple weeks later, as though Eddie was so in tune with Steve's discovery, Eddie came out to Steve at a campfire with Robin and Nance. Those two had wandered off, Eddie made some comment about "Good for Robs," before realizing his mistake. That was, until Steve said "Yeah, good for Robs," and Eddie just had to ask.

"You know about her? Y'know..."

"What? Eddie? Of course! She's my best friend."

"And you're ok with it?" Eddie was kind of shocked. Great 'King' Steve wasn't going to sick the dogs on Hawkins Local Lesbian? And it seemed like he had known longer than Eddie?

"Yeah, when you survive hell and back enough it's pretty hard to hate anyone for being gay." Steve left off the part where he was also into guys. He knew Eddie was ok with that, clearly ok with Robin, but Eddie might not be ok with being the guy Steve was into.

"Oh. Well," Eddie didn't know if it was the couple beers he had downed, or his newfound safety with this big ol' group of misfits, but he was comfortable asking Steve, "What if I was like Robin too?"

"Are you?" Steve asked. He wasn't going to get his hopes up over hypotheticals, but he could admit he had feelings for the older boy. He wasn't sure what feelings to be honest,but he was figuring that out as he went. He just knew they were more than platonic.

"Well, technically I'm the opposite of Robin, y'know. Not attracted to women. But yeah, I am." Eddie stared into the camp fire, torn between hoping that it would eat him alive, or that it would simply stare back.

"Okay, thanks for trusting me." Steve responded, plain as day.

He had asked Robin, if someone were to come out to him (granted they were not just drugged by Russians), what would she have wanted to hear. And he finally got the chance to use it, seeing the way Eddie's shoulders dropped in relief.

"So you're like actually ok with it?"

"Like I said, been to hell and back with you, who you love doesn't mean a thing over that."

" Yeah," Eddie said,"But most straight guys don't like it when gay guys flirt relentlessly with them."

"We'll keep that one between us then, won't we?" Steve wasn't entirely ready to correct Eddie on the straight thing, so he just didn't acknowledge that part. He chose to ignore the blush rise on his face, blaming it internally on the heat of the fire.

He also tried to ignore that at that point, the nicknames picked up.

It started with babes. Then baby, which made Steve's brain flutter. Then sweetheart. Eddie only used that one when he wanted something, and yet Steve still loved it. Stevie was one of the fan favorites. Not really a pet name, but used just as lovingly as one. Sometimes Eddie held out the end, in a sing-song voice. Made Steve weak in the knees. Eddie knew what he was doing.

It was babe that made Steve do something about it. Eddie used sweetheart, baby, Stevie, around everyone. In front of the kids, on his various trips to Family Video (whether to buy or annoy, who knew). But babe. Babe was just for Steve and Steve alone.

So of course, the only logical order of events was for Steve to start using them back.

It started with babe, the obvious choice. Fight fire with fire, or whatever. The meaningless pet names ended with babes too.

Because after Eddie kissed Steve to shut him up, they suddenly had meaning.

[psychelis-new]

pick a pile: "You are..." - Loving and encouraging words for you

take a breath and choose the photo or number that calls you the most to read some loving warm words about you. it's always nice to hear about our positive traits, right? here you can find yours and some encouraging words about your next steps/healing. keep going and take care of you! and also, be ready to let love in, you deserve it :)

don’t take the reading too seriously. only take what resonates with you and leave the rest. if you're not called by any pile, let this reading slid as it may not hold messages for you. if you're called by more than one pile, there may be messages in each of those piles. remember that is a general reading and some things may not resonate with you. energies can change and readings are based on present ones (as you read); you're always in charge of your life.

(photos found on unsplash)

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1 2 3

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pile 1

You are sunny, cheerful, bright and warm. You're also pretty welcoming and you like to hug people or generally enjoy physical displays of affection. I think people like to be around you, you basically cheer up everyone and "set the mood for the evening" (I just heard that, IDK). You have a lovely smile, everyone is in awe with it and you in general; maybe you also have a particular way to laugh? Like you maybe make a strange sound, and everyone is fond of it. They love to make you laugh honestly just to hear it. I feel like you take emotional care of others and you may feel like a sip of fresh water to many. You're extrovert (or at least seem so in specific context), confident and you know exactly what to do or say to make the day of the people you are in contact with. I think you may share smiles with people on the street and even help them if they need (eg. like if they drop something you may pick it up for them, especially for older people or you may leave your seat to them). I think you are very funny and smart, and like to joke a lot. Okay for some of you you may have changed after something happened and keep this sunny side of you a bit hidden (or maybe you occasionally fear being judged about it, or you have been), but honestly I think you only need to reconnect with it and let it flow from you. It's hurtful when some things happen but it's also something that... just happens in life, sadly (I'm not trying to invalidate your experience/pain, at all). We don't have to let those negative things change us so much, especially if we still feel that flame/desire inside. I mean... don't feel guilty for being happy, if that's what you feel. You can be happy no matter what happened. You have to be happy. Find new ways for that happiness to flow within but reach it "and let it rain" out of you. Enjoy it, let it be there and help you heal what hurt as well, if you need. You can find new happiness anytime. New reasons to be happy, too. This is also true for the few of you who tend to hide pain behind a smile, pretending it's all good. Toxic positivity won't solve it, as avoiding problems. Be more balanced (maybe you were called by pile 2 as well) and accepting of what is wrong: it doesn't mean you let it take over you (ask for help if it's too scary), it means you're not being blind to it but you're listening to it and trying to make it better (ofc you can wear a smile while you do that, you totally have to! Healing happens also with taking breaks to enjoy life and hobbies/passions...). You are such a beam of light for everyone, confront your problems (if there's any) and then keep on shining!

song: chicken noodle soup | j-hope; wake me up before you go go | wham! (I channeled the first song while doing your reading, anyway the mood for you is: jitterbug!)

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pile 2

You are strong, pure and very special. You stand out, and honestly you don't even have to do much to stand out. I think it's your energy: it also has something healing for those that comes near you, something comforting. You should be more confident in yourself: maybe you also doubt about your looks or how you may be seen/perceived by others but honestly you have/are nothing less than anyone else. You are caring and have a good heart; maybe you have buildt some walls around yourself out of past traumas, and this is blocking you a little when it comes to sharing with others or creating deeper relationships. It's okay take your time to work through those walls. You have beautiful eyes, and maybe you like to look at others in the eyes too? I think you are also sincere, honest and humble, at times also to a fault: please do stand up for yourself when you need, and set your boundaries. You may also be a bit too strict on you, especially when you make some type of mistakes or something? Maybe it's the fear I mentioned in the beginning of being perceived as you're not or in a bad way, or maybe... at times you may be scared of your thoughts somehow. It's not just the anxiety you may get from them and how they may make you spiral so you tend to stop them (it's okay to do this and distract your mind when you start feeling overwhelmed, but please come back to those thoughts when you feel calmer: to avoid thinking about a problem won't help you solve it at all, it will come back stronger. And please ask for help if you need), but there's also something else. Remind yourself usually the first thought is what we learned, our instinctive first reaction to a situation (usually comes up to "protect us") while the second thought we have is the one that comes from the heart, it really expresses what we think with a calmer and more balanced mind. I mean, eg. let's say someone says they got something you always wanted and this triggers you: your first reaction could also be being envious of them and feel not enough compared to them and potentially say or think something negative/feel resentful or angry, but if you stopped and thought about it again, you may just be really happy for this person and see yourself as on a different path: your time will come too. Be more kind with yourself, more patient: you're unlearning a negative mental pattern and that's not easy, it will take time and practice and lot of patience. You are so lovely you have no idea, please try to see and show that yourself too.

song: a little bit yours | jp saxe (indeed come back to your core self and show yourself love, and accept it too; closing chapters, changing and unlearning stuff is hard, but you can make it)

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pile 3

You are multilayered. You have lovely rosey cheeks, people may want to squeeze them lol. You are sweet and cute, you probably are also a little shy or maybe you feel anxious in social settings and you may end up blushing a lot. You may also be stubborn occasionally (not too bad tbh) and can be determined or at least you reach good results in job/school. I think you tend to hide a part of yourself though or find it hard to deal with it/not like it. There's something you fear showing or that you don't want others to see about you, probably your pain, probably something from your past that you keep inside (also cause you can't accept/understand it -it could be abuse for someone, I hope you are safe now). Maybe you're also "scared"... of being loved/seen for real (having your "mask removed"?) or feeling vulnerable... Your energy feels younger or maybe just unexperienced in some fields or situations (maybe you also feel uncomfortable in some situations or you felt so in the past and you avoided joining them so now you feel a little behind maybe: honestly, there's nothing bad in this. You're not behind, you just did what was better for you and you still have time to make more experiences. You have all the time you need and want). I think there's indeed something about time here, it could be you are nostalgic about something that now you are missing/lacking, maybe feelings you could experience in your childhood, or you want to delete something from your past, or it could be that you fear running out of time, as mentioned, as you want to experience many things still but maybe you are scared you won't make it or you don't know where to start from. Just take a break: the moment you'll feel more grounded, it will come to you. Focus on taking care of you and also do take naps if you need and can. If it's about your childhood, eg. if people taught you have to "grow up" or have dimmed you in any way (or you had to, in order to gain their approval), remember you don't really have to forget about your inner child nor to be someone you're not. You can be an adult and still be in touch with your inner child. It's not that one thing excludes the other. And you can be yourself without any fear (it's hard to believe it but you won't be pushed away by everyone if you aren't as they wish). Maybe your inner child now really needs you to be closer to them, they need your appreciation and support, probably also after something you had to go through in your past: your inner child totally did great back then with all they had. Hug them and show them love. I think some of you may also love to work or be around children or pets as they may help you feel more in touch with your own inner child and more grounded. Again, be attentive to your needs, and meet them: maybe you were *unwillingly* taught you don't deserve that much (you had to accept crumbles in relationships) but it's not so, you deserve the moon: remember this. You're already perfect, there's nothing about you in your past or present that you need to fix, my love. Heal your fears about being yourself, receiving (love in particular) and don't run away from it, don't run away from yourself: you'll get all you wish for. Give it and yourself time. And, if you need this: it wasn't your fault, you were not responsible for that event/decision for which you feel like you were (and maybe you didn't even had to take). Whatever it was. You were trying to win the approval of someone who couldn't love you as you wished. Build boundaries around people (adults) and remember you are not responsible for them and what they do/their mistakes: you're not here to save them from anything. You have your own self and life to care about now.

song: heart attack | demi lovato

[kykyonthemoon]

hiiiiii i love the stories you make. Can you please make rafayel x ballerina reader where reader gets taken care of by rafayel after accidently twisting her ankle during practice?? tyyy 💗💗💗💗💗

Dear Anon-san,

Thank you so much for your request. I also apologize that it took a while to finally get to you. Hope you enjoy this piece, and I'm looking forward to your continued support <3

His Little Ballerina

── .✦ Rafayel x Female Reader|MC

── .✦ Tags: soft, sweet, physical hurt/comfort, fluff, healing, reader is a ballerina

── .✦ Word count: over 1k

── .✦ Ky Ky's note: This is also my first fic after being accepted into oracleofstars network. Yay!!!

── .✦ Masterlist ♡ Request a fic

When he came to pick you up at the hospital, Rafayel's face was already so pale.

Long story short, he had just received a text from you stating that you were at a hospital near your place and needed a ride home. You had accidently fallen while executing a simple pirouette, causing your ankle to twist. Rafayel crossed his arms as he watched you sit there with a swollen ankle, his countenance confusing..

"You can yell at me after you drop me off, okay?" You said. But he did not seem any content. You knew he was genuinely concerned about you, especially after he told you over and over that you were unable to practice ballet right away since you were still a bit unwell.

He had met you for the first time after your play. While everyone was praising your charm, Rafayel was the only one who pointed out the problem with your ankle.

For a Lemurian, witnessing your struggle while dancing reminded him of the agony a merman must go through when he abandons his tail to learn to walk on land. 

Therefore, you totally understood his response when he saw you were constantly getting injured on the practice floor. You did not defy Rafayel, but you felt awful for causing him so much tension.

“You only listen to me when you're in trouble, right?”

Even though he grumbled, Rafayel helped you up, holding your bag and pointe shoes on one shoulder. When he saw your few struggling steps, he winced. Then, he leant down and picked you up. 

"Eh? Rafael?! Put me down.”

Your face turned red. However, Rafayel continued to carry you in his arms and walk away. He said:

"You heard what the doctor said; from now on, you must rest and let me care for you. That means I shall become your legs.”

“But… Is it necessary to carry me like this? You can just give me a piggyback ride…”

Rafayel shook his head: “I won't do so. Carrying you like that would make me seem no less like a turtle!”

You sighed and gave up. You allowed Rafayel to take you to the hospital gate in front of a large crowd. You felt so embarrassed while he kept that serious expression on his face.

You expected him to stop carrying you after you left the hospital, but Rafayel walked instead of calling a taxi. You rolled your eyes and asked:

“Are you going to carry me all the way home?”

Rafayel took a short peek at you before returning his attention to the road ahead. “Your place is nearby. We can walk home.”

You shifted your body somewhat uncomfortably. Rafayel's arms closed around you even more. You nestled myself into his neck and whispered: "People are looking..."

At that moment, a child who had just left the candy store noticed you and Rafayel. She asked:

“Miss! Are you a princess?”

Rafayel's footsteps slowed down a bit so the child could keep up. That was when you discovered you were still wearing your tutu with a flared skirt. People from the studio took you to the hospital; however, because they were busy and knew Rafayel was on his way, they departed right away. 

"So, you must really be a princess to be carried like that, right?" The small girl inquired innocently again. 

Rafayel came to a complete halt. He grinned at her and said:

"Correct, kiddo. She is a princess.”

You used a hand to hit him on the shoulder and said to the child:

"No, no. It's not true. I'm not a princess..."

But it seemed that the child ignored those words. She noticed your twisted ankle and asked:

“Is Her Highness injured?” 

"Yup." Rafayel responded on your behalf. “She just fought a terrible monster, and it injured her ankle.”

The child's eyes were glowing, as if she really believed Rafayel's narrative. She spoke again:

"What a pity! So you came to rescue the princess? Are you her prince?”

Your cheeks felt heated. Perhaps it was because the sun beamed in this way. You were ready to urge Rafayel to stop teasing the child, but perhaps he, too, was caught up in this fabricated setting. 

“A prince? I am not a prince.”

“So who are you?”

Rafayel smirked, he said while looking at you, as if those words were just for your:

“I am the God of the Sea. I am her God of the Sea."

“Whoaaaaaa!” The child cheered, and you held your breath as you caught Rafayel smile at you. The sunshine appeared to cast an aura over him. You could only adore him silently, fearing that a single breath might cause him to vanish. 

At that moment, the girl's mother summoned her back. She placed a little bag of sweets on your lap, atop your flowery skirt, and declared:

"For you, Your Highness. Perhaps you need them more than I do. I pray Your Highness gets better soon!"

After saying that, she ran away. You just had time to say thank you, almost like a shout behind her.

Rafayel grinned all the way home, and you felt happy with simply a bag of sugary treats. You poked his cheek.

"See how delighted you are. She handed me candies; you won't be getting any of them!"

“So unfair!” Rafayel yelled as he kept strolling down the pavement while holding you in his arms. “I'm having a hard time carrying you home. How come you're so blind to see it?”

“Then why did you walk home instead of taking a taxi?” You softly pinched his face and noted the way he pouted.

“I'm exhausted, and dehydrated. Yet you're far from being gentle with me after all!”

You giggled and replied, “You just told that kid I am a princess. So you must serve me in the next few days, right?”

Rafayel did not respond. You figured he was reluctant to confess you had him in the palm of your hand, even if this was not something new for either of you.

“If you stay silent, it means you agree.” You said cheerfully. “Come on, my God of the Sea! I want to go home and have seafood for dinner!” 

Rafayel exhaled. “I give you an inch, you will take the whole yard.” However, he still smiled pleasantly. The afternoon sun imprinted both of you on the road, while your shadow just kissed his, on the cheek.

Mood board from my photo in game & Pinterest.

[gatitties]

Hiii! Can I please get a s/o who has a big butt, but she’s naturally oblivious about it unless she’s in battle? Like she knows her butt is big but she doesn’t know it’s THAT big, (p.s.: she likes wearing wearing regular shorts!)

─Strawhats, Heart Pirates & Kid Pirates x fem!reader

─Summary: you have a big ass, nothing more, nothing less

─Warnings: none

This is so unserious lol, sorry 🤣 oh and I assumed this would be for one piece bc of your profile since you didn't give any further indication 😅

─ Everyone knows it, you are semi-conscious, it's not a big secret that you have more meat on your buttocks, it's obvious just like Zoro's tits are bigger than Nami's or Robin's.

─ It's not something that affects the rest since it's something normal, they are used to it, however you can get different types of reactions from other parties.

─ You're a total distraction to the most shameless people, but at least you can hit them for being distracted.

─ And you'll just make the situation worse if you wear those jeans, you didn't know the power that 'mom' jeans have over some people.

─ Seriously, you wouldn't think it was that exaggerated, you are aware of your body but not to that level, you could really kill someone if you fell on your ass on that person.

─ Sanji probably made some comment about that before…

─ You'll have to hit Brook more than once so he doesn't bother you with your underwear, he's more persistent with you because he wants to know what size you wear.

─ Nami will hit your butt when you're off guard, you know, girly things, you'll have time to hit it back when she's focused on working with her oranges.

─ Once you played guess who and Luffy put a pillow on his butt to imitate you.

─ They try not to look seriously, but Shachi and Penguin's eyes go away accidentally, you don't blame them, you look at the butt of every person you meet, the problem is that yours is not small by any means.

─ Law will probably scold them just like Bepo because doing that is impolite, but his eyes will also take a look, it's okay Ikkaku will be the one to hit them.

─ You are still a distraction for the most morbid people when you wear those tight jeans, Law probably uses you to distract enemies on more than one occasion without you knowing.

─ He also gives you scientific proof that you could suffocate someone with that.

─ And you tried it on your next mission, yeah, you killed someone with your buttocks.

─ You were more aware of the power you carried, whether hypnotically or as an oxygen-depriving weapon, you were a complete danger.

─ Sometimes you have competitions over offensive comments with Shachi and Penguin and they are definitely using your trunk as insult artillery.

─ You get a lot of praise from Ikkaku and comments that you should share some ass for her.

─ Bepo uses it as pillows, please.

─ It's not a mystery, it's something shouted out loud and admired here.

─ Get ready because if you weren't aware of the size of your ass you will be after spending half a day on this crew.

─ No one wants to offend you, far from it, but they will let you know that you have a couple of generous weapons with you.

─ You won't be saved from the stares, but you also have eyes and you observe too…

─ In fact you have a podium for the best ass of the crew and you and Killer always compete for first place.

─ They definitely use you as a distraction for the nastier guys, but they'll be the ones who take the worst beatings.

─ You will also receive a lot of praise from Heat and Wire, they look like two proud moms seeing how you are not ashamed of your body and you continue wearing those pants that enhance your figure even more.

─ You and Kid have a little competition about who hits the other's ass the hardest and you go completely wild.

─ You've suffocated more than one person and the others time it to know what your best time is.

[busket]

I've been seeing posts discussing the terms MTF and FTM saying stuff like "that's how cis people understand our experience, not trans people" or "what do you mean female to male, I've never been female" and I think that's a totally valid stance to have, but I take issue with the implication that those terms should be done away with entirely and that no one can relate to them.

personally, I do believe I was a woman before I transitioned. I lived as a woman, I believed I was a woman, I told people I was a woman. I did all the same when I came out as nonbinary, and I do all the same now that im a man. I don't consider these stages in my life to be any less real. Just because I'm a man now doesn't mean I wasn't a woman then, and just because i was a woman then doesn't make me any less of a man now. I don't relate to the notion that I have a true gender, inherent to my soul. maybe someday I won't be a man, and that's okay. this is all my own life, something that only I know for myself.

honestly I wonder if some trans people feel the need to say "I was never my birth gender" to validate their experience to cis people. you can't be a faker if you've known this all your life. but some trans people, like me, do not share that experience. I doubted if I was a trans man because I didn't relate to it. I find more truth in the term "ftm" than I do to "afab" because the latter defines me now by something that happened to me at my birth, and not an active process I am undergoing and a set of choices I've made to bring joy into my life.

and truly we will never find a set of terms that resonates with everyone, because every single person has a different experience with their gender and not one is more or less correct than another. I'm no less of a man than a trans man who knew all his life he was a man and we are both no less men than a cis man who was born a man and lived his whole life as a man. everyone is different and everyone is going to find truth in different acronyms, and some of us just simply aren't meant to be defined.

[pigcowboys]

Hi I hope you're having a wonderful day <3

I was wondering if you could maybe do percy jackson with a daughter of nyx where they are basically the same person personality wise and have a lot of common interests ( sorry self indulging here🤭). They basically both kin each other lmao

THANK YOU <3

pairing: ꒰percy jackson x nyx! female! reader꒱⋆·˚

summary: general hcs for percy with a nyx! s/o

warning(s): mutual pining, nonsensical bickering, mentions of injuries & kisses

a/n: HIII OMG THIS REQUEST IS SO CUTE :)) i tried my best to do what you requested!! i hope you like it!!

request are closed!

literally off the bat i can see the two of you at each other's throats all the time.

you're just too alike there's no way there's not gonna be bickering man.

"i think we should use a different design."

"who put you in charge?"

"the voices in my head, actually"

"literally what."

i imagine percy kind of being put off by you when he'd first get to camp half-blood like

who are you.

i mean it isn't like he's TRYING to be mean, you're just so annoying sometimes yk.

then i feel like one night he'd sneak out of camp to go stargazing and find you near the shore in his spot.

lowkey annoyed by your presence at first but still proceeds to gaze with you silently. you'd strike up a conversation with him and it'd actually go a lot better than he expected it to go.

okay, maybe you're not that bad.

he'd start to approach you more at camp but like not for any reason at all yk. he just enjoys talking to you, i guess.

probably would be overjoyed when he finds out you have similar interests as him.

you two probably stay up all night talking about the most random stuff.

honestly, those talks are probably the moment when he realizes he..like likes you.

you're just chilling and talking about random shit and he laughs at one of your jokes and has to take a moment because he realized that you're honestly just the best person ever.

and then from that point on he's honestly kind of a mess.

you're so cool to him for some reason?? you'd just be living life and he'd probably just be in the background observing you with big ass heart eyes.

"is there something on my face, perce?"

"huh? uh no, what?"

he knows he likes you but just doesn't know how to say it?? i mean, do YOU even like him back..??

aghhhh it's honestly so draining to him.

he's not shy. just kind of stupid when it comes to feelings.

probably tried to "woo" you somehow by buying you ocean related stuff whenever you go out together.

played it off as him just having some change.

he is willing to go bankrupt for you.

i feel like one day he just got tired of dropping hits and just decided to go for it cause like, you've known each other for a minute.

he'd meet you at that star gazing spot and literally just spill all his feelings for you.

"don't say anything but what if i told you you're an amazing person and probably the coolest person i've ever met in my life and that i'm literally head over heels for you because you're smart and funny and pretty and you're just the best?"

"what?"

and you start dating!! woo!!

HES SO SWEET!!!

once you start dating he def gets a bit more of a confidence boost.

always boasting about the fact he's dating you like everyone else doesn't already now from the way he's always clinging to you.

and if you're not into physical touch no worries!! he's completely and totally fine with it!! probably asks permission to give you hugs and hold your hand.

beach dates.

you'd be that one sappy couple who interlocking hands and walks down the beach together UGHH

he would def be the type of guy to go to you after every quest so you can patch him up. do you even know how to patch him up?? probably not! can't he just use some ambrosia?? yes.

doesn't mean he won't stop.

"percy, what the fuck happened!?"

"what do you mean?? :)"

kind of scared of your mother but would never admit it to your face.

i feel like he'd make some kind of big plan to try and kiss you but it'd ultimately fail.

he'd pull up to you with some beautiful ass flowers with a big grin on his face.

would take you to some really secluded spot that he'd decorated with a bunch of different things and homemade food!! (sally helped him.)

things would be going good till it starts to rain.

not that it's a problem for him at all but it kills the freaking mood.

"i'm so sorry.."

"for what?"

"how this turned out, it was supposed to be this big and..romantic thing."

"it's okay, we can have other dates."

"no like..i wanted us to kiss."

"..."

"..."

"who says we can't right now..?"

"oh."

he's in heaven when you finally kiss for the first time!! you're literally so amazing like wtf he got so lucky.

from that point on you two are locked in for life.

he's everywhere you are, you're everywhere he is NO MATTER WHAT.

he's so in love.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Is it possible to do head cannons for digital circus characters with a reader who's too nice for their own good

Like they get in danger when trying to talk to the bad guy npc thinking that they could persuade them to the good side

TADC cast x reader whos too nice!

Anon I'm so so sorry that it took me so long to get to this <\3! I gotta admit I've been in like, a bit of a burn out recently and I'm still recovering from my baking spree last week so I'm WOOOooOoooooO

That said I hope you enjoy!

Written ambiguously, if you want to see this as romantic or platonic, is totally up to you!

CAINE:

Literally puts a pause on the IHA when he sees you being dragged away by the big bad guy, all while still trying to insist that the NPC with no chance to gain sentience can be good.. caine finds it endearing in it's own way, its sweet, you see the best in people... and non-people... but reader, this is exactly how you get hurt..! Keeps a close eye on you during IHA

POMNI:

While I dont think pomni fits the "too nice for her own good" vibe, I feel that shes... what word am i looking for? Submissive? She kind of just goes with what others are doing; asides from her initial freak out we dont see much pushback from her in the pilot, though that could be thanks to shock... perhaps shes still feeling it during IHAs given how random and intense they can be..? Point is I think pomni would give a meek resistance before scurrying off after you, trying to save you from the clutches of the baddie

RAGATHA:

Shes loves you so much, dont get her wrong. She loves that you're so sweet to everyone, even to those who dont deserve it. Actually if anything, Ragatha is also a little too sweet for her own good.. but shes not as trusting and naive as you are. Frantically pulls you away to the side when you try to make your way to the days villain, gently scolding you and asking what you were thinking. She doesnt mean to make you feel bad, but she doesn't want to see you hurt!

JAX:

One of the only two characters that might get a little mean with you. Not like "mean as in berating you for being so naive" more so "I'm upset that you seemingly have no regard for your safety, I care about you and I cant see you continue to throw yourself into danger" way that can come off as mean, since jax isnt really.. the best as saying this softly.. immediately cuts through any "what ifs" you might bring up to him, you're the only person in this circus that he actually enjoys and hes not going to let you get flung around.. can his tone be softer? Sure, but can you blame him if this is a regular occurrence?

KINGER:

This poor man nearly has a heart attack when he sees you about to be absolutely demolished (but not really thanks to the digital world), probably ends in him getting hurt too.. but that would be mean.. but also can you imagine the angst? The guilt? He probably pushes through the pain to get to you and hes just. Feverishly pulling you to him and patting you down to make sure you're okay... he won't tell you to stop being so nice; in fact I dont think the thought crosses his mind ever.. but he does ask to never do that again, the getting into danger thing

ZOOBLE:

The other character that might get a little mean when confronting you about it, but given zoobles general attitude as well as their tone of voice, it seems like they're more angry with you than they actually are. They think you're too nice for your own good, truly. While the others may find it sweet and endearing, they're constantly thinking about how one day you'll be in over your head and wont have a way out. This might actually result in an argument, thanks to zoobles tone and way of going about things.. but you guys eventually communicate and make up, at least I would like to think so

GANGLE:

Very similar to pomni in the regard that she doesnt have the spine (haha) to tell you not to do whatever you're planning on doing. "I don't think... oh.. oh wait, reader-" as she scurries after you so you dont get lost. Gets legitimately sad and beats herself up if you get hurt. Similar to zoobles, you guys are going to need to communicate and work together on this because gangle cannot handle the fact that you're constantly getting hurt thanks to your kindness grating on her mind all day every day

[hazbin-a-helluvamagines]

Can you do the sfw & nsfw shy!male!reader headcanons again but with Loona and Millie if that’s okay??

"Good Boy" ; Loona, Millie

SFW:

Totally understands insecurity! All her life, she's felt like she wasn't important enough to be her own person, so she'll be the first to try and quell those worries in you.

"Oh, don't worry, S/O, you're cute as a button, y'know that?!"

Probably maims anyone who makes you feel insecure, not gonna lie.

She'll try to help you come out of your shell, but if you can't? That's okay, she's got enough energy and outspokenness for both of you!

She'll at least try to get you integrated with I.M.P., though, since after all, those are like her found family.

Speaking of, her actual family... probably think you're a wuss.

Except for Sallie May, though she teases you a little, too, but it's more lighthearted.

Don't worry, though. You got a badass girl who will stick up for you, no questions ask. And Sallie will go right behind her out of love for her sister.

NSFW:

She's a very sweet dom!

She'll be checking every few minutes that you're comfortable, not in any pain, etc.!

I say this because, based on Moxxie, we know she likes pegging, so... be ready for that.

She won't do it if you're not comfortable, though, of course. Everything she does needs EXPLICIT consent, none of the "reading between the lines" that others could do.

"Don'tcha worry, honey-bun! We got all night for this stuff!"

She's very patient, and makes sure to praise you repeatedly.

After all, she understands that your self-esteem is already low enough and your shyness can lead to insecurity, she doesn't want this to be another for you.

She's always very cautious introducing new things into the bedroom and always very slow-paced. After all, she doesn't want to scare you, and wants you to know you can stop at any point and trust her to do the same if you tell her to.

SFW:

She won't make fun of you as much as she makes fun of everyone else, at the very least. And for you, it'll always be miniscule things.

While she's ridiculing Moxxie for his weight, she's teasing you for the jewelry you have on, for example.

Jewelry she gave you, mind you.

But that's because she knows that won't affect you as much, since if she really hated it, she wouldn't have bought it for you.

She also won't let anyone else talk shit. I mean, she's an assassin, anyone who tries has a nasty surprise coming for them.

"Excuse me? Do you have something to say? Or are you that pathetic that you think mocking someone who can actually manage to have what you don't is attractive? Didn't think so. Get the fuck out of my sight. Don't ever look at me or my boyfriend again."

Will let you mess with her ears or tail if you get overwhelmed in public or just need a distraction. Do be gentle though, it isn't like those aren't a part of her!

Matching outfits, too. No need to feel insecure in your relationship with her. <3

NSFW:

She's kind of a lazy dom, to be honest.

Like, she'll tell you what to do, but she won't actually do anything, herself. That'd be preposterous!

The "slight groaning, will muffle her moans" type. She won't be overt about praise, but she'll definitely still give it so you don't feel bad about it.

"Fuck- Stop. Right there, what you just did. Keep doing that."

She's not the meanest, but she's also far from nice to you. She'd have you eat her out while she's on her phone, and if you satisfied her, she'd let you fuck her.

But honestly, she doesn't really mind anything you wanna try on her, and won't shame you for the idea, just some light teasing.

If she sees that her teasing upsets you, though, she'll stop.

Probably the type to make you wear a collar and take a picture for... later use.

[iridescentdove]

Helloo, I was thinking about a scenario with Nikolai and a twin sister reader who’s similar to Lynette if it’s possible. Tyy 💕

Nikolai Gogol x Lynette! Reader

Hello anon! I'm back ... again. I'm an on and off person in this app at this point lmfao. By the way, requests are closed for now everyone! But you can still ask me questions and other stuff. Let's start.

Lyney is a more reserved girl. She rarely talks to others out of her own accord, letting Lyney (in this case Nikolai) do the talking for her, and dissuades essentially any attempt to speak with her by saying bizarre responses. Whenever she needs to talk, she speaks briefly and frankly.

NIKOLAI GOGOL:

Both of you are literally the polar opposites, it's kinda funny. Nikolai is that one fun dude at parties and you're just the one sitting in the corner watching him like 🗿

Nikolai: dumb bitch

You: dumb bitch's caretaker and sister unfortunately but whatever

Honestly he's not annoying, he's actually just cheerful around you and loves to hang around you. He's one of those rare actual good big brothers! <3

Often you're very reserved and prefer to keep to yourself, so he does most of the talking.

He doesn't let you see Fyodor, or even breathe in his direction. We all know why. And i'm pretty sure even Nikolai is sane enough to know he won't let anything happen to you. You're his precious little dove, aren't you?

People find you two a fun duo ngl

Like, you're also his assistant when he does magic and you both are unintentionally goofy as hell.

It's not even a coincidence at this point, I can totally see this guy being Lyney. Imagine he's just being down bad for Fyodor and you have to drag him away like "not again bitch"

He fr needs to chill. Like we know you want to kill him but tf that light skin stare for 🤨

I'd like to think that both of you take the time out of your day to have some fun together. Given BSD is just death, death and more death.

I totally headcanon Nikolai to love amusement parks.

He cannot stop trolling. The moment you're not looking he's out here making children CRY

You have to drag him away to stop him from getting kicked out or something.

Nikolai isn't overprotective, but he's not chill either. I'd like to believe that he trusts you, but at some point if someone even so much as looked at you weird–

They'll be in the seventh circle of hell pretty quick.

He honestly loves how chill and seemingly reserved you are, the fact you're so patient with him, he appreciates a lot.

But will be very dramatic when it comes to showing love to you. Come on now, he's a clown. what did u expect

"My dear sister says she is on her period. I am too. It's uterUS." "That doesn't mean you can wear my PADS"

... 😐

Okay nevermind, sometimes he does get overbearing. But you guys are the perfect siblings anyway.

Sorry if I couldn't do a scenario, I had no idea what to do. Writers' block still has me.

[rederiswrites]

I don't see how trump turning America into a christofacsist state is any different than the norm? like it's been like that for native and black people since it's creation like we inspired the nazis in the first place so like what the point? oh trumps gonna kill everyone who isn't a white cis male! and? that's what america's best quality since day one

Okay I'm actually going to respond to this Edgelord Supreme bullshit, because as absurd as it looks written out like this, I actually do think a lot of people are feeling some half-articulated version of this despair and cynicism. Let's kick that in the ass.

First, let's get one thing straight. History has been terrible awful bad always and forever. There have been a thousand genocides and a million wars and a billion brutal, inhuman war crimes. Back in the days of the earliest civilizations, wiping out entire cities when you defeated them was basically just how things were done for many societies. The fact that we have international laws and international bodies of justice, however obviously toothless they remain, is the result of thousands of years of extremely mixed progress.

So at this point, you pretty much have to say either that a) humans are an incurable blight and don't deserve to live, or b) that we've done amazing, beautiful things and experienced billions of moments of happiness and created art and fallen in love despite all this, so we're still worth working on. Personally, I am very strongly in camp b. I see things worth living for a hundred times a day. There's really no comparison.

Second, the USA is not uniquely bad. It is terribly damaging to people both within its borders and all over the world. It is build on genocide and slavery. Many of its foundational institutions are deeply corrupted by these things. And guess what, that's uh....pretty common. No, really. The US is currently a big fucking problem. It's our turn with the big stick, for sure. But even then, we're not alone.

So how the fuck is this encouraging? It isn't. I'm not encouraging you, I'm telling you to fucking GET GOOD, because when you say shit like the above, what I hear is "Oh I SEE, I'm a TERRIBLE PERSON I guess I should just kill myself to make your life easier." I hear someone who would rather give up and call their country morally bankrupt and irredeemable than to PUT IN SOME FUCKING WORK.

Cynicism is so comfortable. It doesn't ask anything of you. "It's always been like this," it says. "Nothing's going to change."

Except things do change, and things have changed, and your entire premise is in fact absolute dogshit. The two presidential candidates are not remotely the same, and we are not, yet, a Christofascist nation. I could, as many before me already have, enumerate the million concrete ways in which your premise is just not true, but honestly I won't bother, because it's not a premise in good faith. What I mean by that is that even a cursory examination of the actual facts would totally trash your expressed beliefs, so you're not really interested in the facts.

Change for the better can happen. Change for the better has happened. It's just not as EASY as you want it to be. There are more steps. For example, you can't have viable independent candidates until you have campaign finance and voting reform. So you have to push for those things. For years, probably decades. Many people have died without seeing the realization of things they fought for, and yet those things have come to pass. You may die fighting the good fight and not see the victory. I may too. Meanwhile, you make the choices that will hopefully get the fewest people killed.

So stop acting like we're all just too shitty to bother about, and put in some fucking work.

[kimbappykidding]

At first you only did it to tease Bahiyyih.

Don't get the wrong idea, you did think Kai was good-looking and liked him but seeing Bahiyyih's face while you flirted with him was so funny you had to keep doing it.

You and Bahiyyih were famously a Tom and Jerry of Kep1er. You loved Bahiyyih a lot but were very different. She was a lot more composed, quiet and thoughtful...you were none of those things. You got told the reason you'd debuted was because of your personality and took that as a compliment. You were loud, charming and confident. So it was always a clashing of worlds when you and Bahiyyih came together and you loved nothing more than to tease her or push her buttons and one day a new idea of how to do that came to you.

You were at a party and loving it! The idol life was still new to you so every party was like an insane VIP event you'd snook into and Yujin was constantly having to remind you that this was your life now but the excitement still hadn't left you yet. TxT were also here and they'd always been so kind and supportive to you from the start because of Bahiyyih's brother. You knew him the most out of the boys but hadn't really spoken to him or the guys one-on-one ever. So when you joined the line for the bar and Yeonjun waved you to them near the front you were pleasantly surprised.

They asked what you wanted and then added it to their order. "Don't worry I can get my own" you said feeling bad but all the guys brushed that comment away. "It's okay Kai's paying for it" Beomgyu explained and your eyes widened "I can't make you do that!" you cried but Kai just smiled at you "don't be silly of course you can. I'd act like this if I saw any of my sister's friends". "Really?" you asked smiling "you're a real modern-day gentleman?" challenging him slightly. "I like to think so" Kai replied and Yeonjun nodded "yeah he is pretty nice, that's why all our female staff loved him so much". "Isn't that just because he's cute?" you asked and then paused because that came across as way flirtier than you meant. Beomgyu and Taehyun burst out laughing and Kai blushed. Yeonjun and Soobin looked very proud and you laughed too. "Sorry I didn't mean for that to come across so forward" you told Kai who shook his head "don't apologise, it's not like it's a bad thing to hear a pretty girl thinks you're cute". You smirked "are you sure you're Bahiyyih's brother?" which made Kai laugh and you happened to glance back to see Bahiyyih staring at you.

That's when the idea came to you and you turned back to Kai who seemed very pleased by your comment. "Kai is full of surprises!" Beomgyu told you and you smiled sipping on the drink he'd just gotten you "I'm starting to see that, thanks for the drink Kai. I'll get the next one and totally not as an excuse to talk to you again" and with a wink walked away.

When you got back to your table the girls could tell something had happened...the TxT guys clapping Kai on the back and staring after you with huge smiles was probably a bit of a giveaway.

"What was going on over there?" Xiaoting asked and you smiled "oh nothing just chatting to Kai and his friends". "Looked a little more than that" Bahiyyih said and you smiled "hey I can't help it if your brother's hot" and Bahiyyih paused "I'm sorry he's what?". "He's hot!" you cried "everyone knows it, right girls?" you asked looking for backup but even Dayeon didn't dare to agree. So you were on your own but didn't mind that. "Well they won't admit it but Bahiyyih your brother's hot and I think I've got a shot with him". "Got a shot?" she asked "so are you trying to...wait never mind. I don't want to know what you want with him". You smirked "I'll keep you in suspense" and caught Kai's eye across the room. He blushed and shot you a small smile which you returned. You caught Bahiyyih watching and gave her a big smile. This was going to be so much fun.

Bahiyyih watched Kai with you the rest of the night and could tell he was into you. The two of you spoke a few more times and Kai's eyes were glued to you each time. He laughed at everything you said and you'd definitely taken an interest in him which he loved. Out of all her members, Bahiyyih supposed you were pretty much Kai's perfect type so she shouldn't be surprised...but it still took her back when Kai came to her about you a week later.

They'd met up for breakfast to discuss their sister's birthday and what they were going to get her. Once that was done Kai shot her a look "so Y/n" Kai said and it took everything for Bahiyyih not to react. "Yeah?" she asked trying to act calm and Kai looked down shyly "is she seeing anyone?" he asked coyly. Bahiyyih hesitated "why? Are you into her?". Kai blushed and Bahiyyih gasped "omg you are! You fancy my member!". "I wouldn't say fancy just she's really pretty and we got talking the other night. I like her confidence and don't remember you saying anything bad about her". "Because there's nothing bad to say" Bahiyyih admitted "she's cute, funny and talented. Sure she can be a little loud and reckless but I've never found her to be too much" she said begrudgingly. Kai smiled "do you think she might be into me?". Bahiyyih nodded "yes" but didn't elaborate and then feeling the obligation to be the good sister she added "I'll send you her number".

Kai had texted you before Bahiyyih had even got home from their dinner. She came to warn you and found you already in a string of texts with him. "I'm so touched" you told her as she went to leave your room and she froze. "Why?" she asked and you smiled "because you could've forbidden him from texting me but you actually gave him my number. You must think I'm such a great person to set me up with your brother" you said grinning at her and Bahiyyih rolled her eyes. "Sure if you want to see it that way go for it" she said "can I just ask you one thing?" and you nodded "sure!". "Just don't hurt him" she said and you paused "what? What makes you think I would?". "I don't know at first I couldn't tell if this was all to get a rise out of me but if it is please stop. Kai may seem strong and hides it well but he's vulnerable and soft. A girl like you could destroy him". "A girl like me?" you asked and Bahiyyih nodded "confident, cool, sexy. Someone who has her pick of guys" she sighed "don't break his heart please?". "I won't" you promised "I have no intention to hurt him...atleast in a bad way" you said with a wink and Bahiyyih groaned but your joke did its job, it lightened the mood.

You and Kai texted for a week before you suggested meeting up. It wasn't anything deep, you just asked if he wanted to grab a coffee when you had a longer lunch break and he agreed to help you pass the time. Plus you were still getting a kick from being friends with a member's brother and Bahiyyih's reaction when you announced you were leaving to see Kai made you smile all the way to the Hybe building. Kai offered to come to you but you fancied a walk and a nosy around Hybe. Kai had given your name to the man at the front desk and you were let straight through. You took the elevator up to the correct floor and ping, you were here.

The doors opened and there you were! Kai's heart did a little leap because he'd been nervous about this since you planned it and now here you were! You shot him a big happy smile and walked confidently over to him. "Hey, thanks for having me over!" and Kai smiled "oh it's not problem, if you ever need to waste some time just let me know". You nodded "but spending time with you is never wasting time" and walked into the cafe without any hesitation. Kai followed just a second behind you and watched as you took everything in. "It's a pretty nice cafe and not too busy so we can sit anywhere" Kai explained, feeling like he was stating the obvious but you nodded. "How about by the window?" you asked and Kai followed you nodding his head.

You both went up to order and you ordered first and moved to the other side of the till to get your drink. Kai was waiting to pay for his drink when your presence became known.

"Who let you in?" Kai heard someone ask aggressively and worried some security person had thought you'd snook in. He turned around panicked, but saw it was Enhypen or specifically Jay, Jake and Sunghoon. They were all around you but you had a smile on your face so seemed fine. Regardless Kai quickly paid and rushed over to find you were explaining the situation.

You saw Kai and smiled "see, here he is!" and the guys turned to look at Kai. "Did you really invite her in here or is she lying like she always does?" Jay asked and Kai felt himself bristle. "Yes I invited her here and she's never lied to me". Jay paused but you and the others laughed. "See! You're clearly the problem" you said pushing your way to Kai's side "now you owe me an apology!" you said to Jay. "I'm sorry" he said smiling sweetly "I just figured you were here to see me".

Kai's eyes widened slightly at the flirting but you just snorted "please you'd be the last person I'd be here to see" and you turned to Kai "we're all in that 2002 group chat right? I know them from there". Kai nodded as if he hadn't stopped checking that chat a few weeks after being added to it. "Jake and Sunghoon are good friends" you said smiling at the two boys and purposefully leaving Jay out. When he started to protest such treatment you simply said you and Kai had to go and steered a very relieved Kai away from the group.

Things got better once you sat down and actually started talking. Kai's heartbeat returned to a normal level and he realised how much he liked having your attention on him when someone else stole it.

Fromis_9 spotted you when they came in for a coffee and they all rushed to greet you. Apparently, you knew more Hybe members than Kai and they all gushed over you and demanded you come visit them too. "Yeah why does Kai get a visit from you and we don't?" Jiwon asked and Kai blushed at the question but you just smiled. "Because Kai's special" and gave him a small wink. Kai was on cloud nine and even waved as all the girls walked away.

"Wow you know everyone!" he remarked when his brain started functioning again and you laughed. "Yeah I can't even deny it! The girls claim I'm a natural social butterfly and I think they're right. I just love people and start conversations with everyone around me. That's how I become friends with so many people". Kai nodded "wow I can't even imagine that, I'm not the most outgoing person". "Nonsense! You were so friendly when I met you at the bar!" you said and Kai shrugged "yeah but I had the guys with me. I can be quiet on my own". "Well good things you'll always have people with you huh?" you asked and Kai hoped you were insinuating you'd be around him more. "Plus it's nice to be a little introverted, I can be like that too. When I get home I just like to hide in my room for a few hours and be alone. You can't always be on the go and it's nice to do nothing sometimes". Kai was so relieved you said that and nodded along enthusiastically "I couldn't agree more".

Your lunch break just flew by and before you knew it, you had to head back to work. "You know, you're a very nice person to be around" you said as Kai walked you to your building and he blinked "I am?". You nodded "you're simultaneously chill and warm. As in you're very calming but also nice. It's a nice mix". Kai smiled "nobody's ever told me that before but I'm glad you feel that way". "So would you like to meet again?" you asked "maybe spend more time together on a date or something?". Kai's eyes widened and he nodded vigorously as his mouth seemed unable to catch up with his brain. "Yes I'd love that!" he finally said and you laughed "great! Text me?" and Kai nodded "definitely". With a cute laugh, you waved to him and disappeared into your building. Kai let out a large cheer and then covered his mouth, worried you might've heard him. You did but thought it was funny.

When you got back to work you walked inside with a bounce in your step and Bahiyyih looked at you. "You're in a good mood" Dayeon said and you smiled "I had a good break" and that was all you said about your cafe date but it was enough. Bahiyyih heard you had an official date with Kai the next week and was nervous all over again. She just had to hope you'd keep your promise.

Kai was very surprised when you said you wanted to go to a museum for your first official date. From your personality he expected you'd want to go to some bar or loud party but you explained they'd added a few new exhibits since you'd last been and that you liked the environment. So pleasantly surprised, Kai met you outside on a crisp autumn morning. He spotted you coming as soon as you came around the corner but pretended to be on his phone so as to not seem too eager (even though he was). You called his name and came right over to him confidently. "Hey it's good to see you" you smiled going in for a hug and Kai hugged you back. "You too! I always loved museums but haven't been to this one so in excited". You smiled "then let's not keep you in suspense any longer!" and led him inside.

Kai remembered Yeonjun saying ages ago that with social events, it's not where you go but who you go with that makes it enjoyable and Kai had thought he was wrong...until you proved him otherwise. You made going to a museum such an exciting enjoyable thing and Kai wasn't even sure how! You were just so funny and charismatic. You knew exactly when to crack and joke and also when to be quieter and he loved it. You laughed a lot and Kai liked that. You weren't too serious and seemed to just go with the flow. He could see how you'd got chosen for the group and everyone who came into contact with you seemed charmed by you. He felt lucky to be out on a date with you and whenever you smiled at him his stomach did backflips.

You went to dinner together afterwards and Kai got to ask you more about your life and he found you fascinating. You'd done so much and seemed to throw yourself into any situation with determination and optimism. You'd become a kpop idol by chance. You auditioned for the group purely because your friend dared you to and you actually got called back to the next stage! You hadn't prepared any song and just sang your favourite one. When they asked why you wanted to become an idol you were honest and said you hadn't planned to come today but it looked fun. Kai had personally planned for ages for his audition and loved the idea of you just showing up randomly and killing it. He found your confidence so attractive and honestly thought everything about you was hot. You stayed talking for 2 hours before Kai had to leave to go to a fitting and he must've been very obvious in not wanting to leave because you asked him out for a second date right there and then. Kai of course said yes.

Bahiyyih of course remembered the day of your date and when you came into work the next day she was eyeing you trying to work out how it had been. Finally, Hikaru asked how everyone's day off had been and Bahiyyih leaned in expectantly. "It was good" you smiled "I had my date with Kai and I won't talk about it too much Bahiyyih don't worry but it went well". The girls all began to cheer but didn't get much out of you which was typical. The one-time Bahiyyih wanted you to talk about her brother you didn't. You did say you had a second date next week though so she knew it had gotten off to a good start.

2 weeks later TxT were at an event. Kai was calmly watching the different idols file into the party when Beomgyu hit him. "Hey Kai it's your girlfriend" Beomgyu cried and Kai's hand reached out and slapped him. "Shhhh we've only been on 2 dates!" he cried and Beomgyu gasped "I was joking she's not even here". "Oh that's okay then" Kai said and Beomgyu glared "for you!" massaging his arm. "You did provoke him" Yeonjun said and Taehyun nodded.

You actually did enter the party a few minutes later and Kai's breath caught but you didn't spot him straightaway. You were chatting with a few guys from Ateez and his expression must've given away his thoughts because Yeonjun laughed. "Don't worry she's just friends with Wooyoung and Jongho". Kai smiled and tried to laugh it off "what? Who is? Oh you mean Y/n?" before realising it wasn't working. "You think?" he asked and Yeonjun nodded "yeah Wooyoung's mentioned her before, plus she's friends with tons of guys so no reason to think she's interested in them in particular!". Yeonjun realised that might not have helped the situation when he saw Kai's face. "What Yeonjun means is she's just a social person, hanging out with someone doesn't have to mean anything" Taehyun explained. "Then does she just think I'm another friend?" Kai asked feeling like an idiot.

The guys all rushed to assure him that wasn't the case but Beomgyu (still feeling a bit pouty about his sore arm) figured the best way to get rid of Kai's doubts was to get you in front of him. As you came nearer their group he turned and called "oh hey Y/n!" loudly making you look over at them. Kai went pink as you looked at him and smiled. You said something to Ateez and they nodded as you left them and came over.

"Hey Beomgyu! Any reason you shouted my name out like that?" you called out. "I'm just so happy to see you!" he said and you smiled "hmmm so It was because you were trying to make Kai blush or anything right? Because that's not nice and I'm sure you wouldn't like it if someone did it to you". "Nobody can make me blush sweetie" Beomgyu replied and you smiled "really?" and stepped closer. "What are you doing?" Beomgyu asked but you cut him off, putting your arms around his neck. "Wow you're really good looking Beomgyu. You're the perfect balance between beauty and masculinity. You've got a great body and your arms look amazing. Your skin is just flawless, your eyes sparkle so much and your lips...." you trailed off looking at them and biting your own before smiling "they just look delicious, can I have a taste?". Beomgyu went bright red and began stuttering while the guys busied themselves laughing except for Kai who was stunned, turned on and a little jealous all at once. Luckily though you turned away from Beomgyu quickly and looked at Kai "Hey, want to get a drink?". He nodded "sure!" and you led him away linking your arm through his.

You stayed together for the rest of the night and Kai was really pleased you wanted to spend time with him so publically. You weren't joined at the hip, both his members, yours and a bunch of idols you knew fluttered in but you never went far from him and carried on chatting to him all night. He liked being around you and although he was growing more and more comfortable with you that excited feeling never went away which made him happy.

You asked Kai if he wanted to grab some air with you about 3 hours in and he happily stepped outside with you. The two of you found a bench and sat down together. "I can't believe haven't told you this but you look really beautiful" Kai said and you smiled "thanks I like outfits like this" you said looking down at your beautiful trousers "they make me feel powerful without worrying about my ass hanging out like I do with stage outfits". Kai paused "yeah I would definitely hate for that to happen to me on stage" and you laughed. "You look really nice tonight too" you said "but now I can get the image of you in a miniskirt out of my head". "Hey I'd pull it off! I have nice legs" Kai said and he went to move his leg onto the bench when you stopped him with a hand on his arm. You smiled "I believe you, you don't have to prove it. You seem to have nice everything" and you gave him a once over "nice eyes, nice smile, nice hair" you said "nice lips". You looked up at him as you said that and Kai got your meaning and leaned down to kiss you.

The second you kissed him back Kai knew for sure you did like him and he was on top of the world! This beautiful girl wanted him and he sure wanted you. It was of course your first kiss as a couple and Kai loved how natural it felt. Thinking back, he couldn't believe he'd been the one to move first. Sure you'd pretty much set it up for him to follow but he was still impressed he had that confidence. It was pretty simple though, he kissed you because he wanted to and there had been nothing else on his mind at that moment.

It was a good kiss too. Kai had figured with you he might be a little out of his depth but he wasn't. You seemed more experienced than him but he kept up well, fuelled by his feelings for you and when you both pulled back he wasn't the only one flushed.

"That was nice...really nice" you smiled and Kai agreed. He wanted to keep kissing you but you rested your head against his shoulder and he really just wanted to make you happy so wrapped an arm around you and relaxed. It was the best night of his life!

The guys could all tell something had happened because Kai was beaming and in an excellent mood the rest of the night. He laughed at all of Beomgyu's jokes and was singing softly to himself in the car on the way home. "What did Y/n say to make you so lovesick?" Taehyun finally asked and Kai blushed "she didn't say anything we just kissed". "You kissed!" Yeonjun yelled nearly giving Soobin a heart attack. "Yeah we had our first kiss...no big deal" Kai said but the huge grin on his face showed it was. All the guys were thrilled because Kai had never dated before and he seemed really happy! His smile was so genuine and joyous that the guys decided then and there that they liked you. Anyone who made their maknae smile this much had to be good news.

After your kiss, you knew you and Kai were something and figured you should update Bahiyyih. You were sure Kai wouldn't tell her about the kiss but didn't want it to come up randomly and blindsight her. So you explained you'd kissed Kai and were seeing him again next week. Bahiyyih nodded "I figured when he came back inside looking like it was the Christmas he got a piano, so do you like him?". You nodded "of course! I wouldn't kiss him if I didn't". Bahiyyih nodded "and so what are you? Are you dating or just casual". "Just casual at the moment" you shrugged "it's so new, we haven't really discussed it". "Are you seeing any other guys?" Bahiyyih asked and you laughed "what is this 21 questions?". Bahiyyih sighed "I don't mean to be nosey but if you are seeing other guys just make that clear to Kai". You frowned "I think you're underestimating your brother. He's not a child". Bahiyyih nodded "I know he's not but I just don't think there should be any miscommunication. You can't do anything wrong if you were honest". "Well I'm not planning on sleeping with any guys between now and next week" you replied back feeling a little annoyed at Bahiyyih acting like you were guilty of something. She took in your cold tone and nodded leaving the room. Suddenly teasing Bahiyyih was becoming the least fun thing about this.

If it was obvious Kai liked you before the kiss, after the kiss he was just downright embarrassing. He'd literally stop walking when he saw you and even did this on stage. He couldn't resist smiling when he spotted you and Soobin had to keep nudging his foot with his own to stop him. Kai could talk about you for ages and Taehyun had to ask him to stop many times so he could go to sleep. So seeing as Kai was falling headfirst the guys decided they should meet you properly, just to make sure you were into Kai too and he wasn't being taken advantage of. Kai was THRILLED with the idea of inviting you around for dinner and you agreed happily. You liked being around people and TxT seemed so fun so you were so up for it. Plus you were craving time with Kai more and more so it was a win-win.

Kai drove over to yours despite you telling him you could drive yourself. He said he wanted to make sure you got here okay but really he just wanted to get some time with you before the boys steamrolled everything and he warned you a little bit about that. "So Yeonjun will be all over you but not physically" Kai said, blushing slightly "just Yeonjun loves people and they love him so you'll find him really easy to talk to. Beomgyu is an ambivert but he seems to really like you so he'll probably flirt with you and want your attention" Kai said "Soobin is introverted but the leader so he'll be all welcoming and make sure you're okay, you have enough drinks stuff like that. Then there's Taehyun who seems quiet but is actually extroverted and you really see that around us so I think you'll see a different side that you're used to".

You nodded "wow this is all so useful thank you! You know your members super well huh?". Kai nodded "yeah, we've been together a while and I tend to be the observer so I notice things". You smiled "that's true but I have seen some videos where you go chaotic Kai" you said "I love when you tease your hyungs". Kai paused "wait you watched some of our videos?". You smiled "of course! I mean I'd seen all your music videos but I also wanted to see what idol Kai was like and you're very funny" you said shooting him a glance. Kai's cheeks went full pink and he laughed a goofy happy laugh before blushing. "I also love your dolphin scream" you said and Kai burst out laughing making you laugh too. "I don't do it on purpose!" he cried and you smiled "I know that's what makes it so good! You're effortlessly great Kai" and he grinned. A compliment from you always made him smile.

Everything went down exactly as Kai said it would. Soobin greeted you at the door and was playing the role of attentive hostess when Yeonjun appeared and barreled over him. Yeonjun was charismatic and quickly established a connection with you based on mutual interests. Taehyun and Beomgyu entered next and while Taehyun gave you a polite nod and smile Beomgyu came right over to you and started flirting. As the night continued, you spoke to Taehyun more and discovered he was really cool! He also had a big presence despite being the smallest and you instinctively liked him too.

You were talking to Yeonjun and Soobin and smiled as Soobin asked if you wanted anything from the kitchen and Yeonjun complimented your shoes. "What?" Yeonjun asked and you shook your head "nothing just before I got here Kai gave me a rundown on how you'd all act and he was totally right. Everything you guys have done is exactly what he said". Yeonjun laughed "wait what did he say?" and you explained. "I am great with people" Yeonjun smiled and Soobin nodded "I am a good host" and you smiled at their happy expressions.

"It's just so sweet Kai notices this about everyone. He's so sweet and kind" you said watching him across the room with Taehyun, making Soobin and Yeonjun smile. "Yeah he is" Soobin nodded "and you've definitely caught his attention which for a person who observes everything is impressive". "It is?" you asked and Yeonjun nodded "totally! Like you said Kai notices everything so the fact he's into you shows he's only seen good things which means you're either a wonderful person or a cunning mastermind" he said frowning as he sized you up. You hit his arm "obviously it's the first one" and Yeonjun smiled "yeah of course...it's just you think he's sweet for noticing us. You should see how sweet he is around you". "Really?" you asked and Yeonjun went to jump into it when Soobin elbowed him and shook his head. Yeonjun did big eyes and some mental conversation between them was had. You got the gist Yeonjun could speak but not say too much so he turned to you. "We don't want to give anything away but he's basically a puppy in adoration with you" Yeonjun said and Soobin hit him "dude!" but it was okay. You found it sweet and were very very pleased. You had noticed some things in how Kai acted around you in particular but weren't sure how much you were reading into things, so to hear his members confirm things was reassuring of Kai's feelings.

You hadn't meant to find a sweet boyfriend going into this but life had thrown you some good luck...so it was only just that there was some bad luck on the horizon too.

I hope you had a nice relaxing Christmas!

This will be a two-part series and part two is out now!

[markantonys]

My Mom Reacts To: wheel of time season 2 episodes 5-8 (episodes 1-4) (season 1)

the episode 1-4 post did not contain book spoilers, but this one does, so beware!

first, some dinnertable questions that arose in the past few days:

mom: 3000 years ago, when the first dragon was around, was ishamael--wait. was ishamael the dragon? me: no mom: but he was around back then? me: yes, he was the first dragon's best friend, but then he betrayed him mom: just like how liandrin is betraying everyone

(also, she keeps trying to call him "ishmael" like the moby dick character)

mom: at the end of 14 books, does good triumph over evil? me: i'm not gonna tell you that mom: well this show won't go for 14 seasons, or if it does, i'll be in a dementia ward by then

mom: how long is someone the amyrlin? me: for life, unless they get removed mom: is it an elected position or would they have like a coup? me: [sweating] it's an elected position

she wanted to know where everything was, so i pulled out the handy randland map mug she gave me for christmas to show her! haha

she also asked if we see more of the other colors (ajahs) in the books, and i said if anything we see less because liandrin and alanna have much less screentime in the books, and she was very surprised to hear that

dad: [setting up a dad joke voice] what's it called when lan dies? me: what? dad: lan's end

(okay that might be an americans-only joke lmao there's a big clothing chain called lands' end, not sure how widespread it is. but it cracked ME up, at least!)

mom: does lan die?!?!?!? me: you read his wikipedia article like 2 months ago mom: well i don't remember any of it, that was a long time ago!

she also assumed that no one who is together now (lanaeve + randgwene) will end up together. i'd straight up told her a while ago that rand and egwene don't end up together but she wasn't totally sure of that now, so i think it's actually okay if i tell her spoilers because she'll forget them immediately djkfjgh

episode 5

"she should be glad to get those ridiculous nails cut"

she was horrified by the horse slaughter!

my dad laughed at the guy getting his head exploded, maybe it's not just rand maybe he just likes to see Anyone have a bad time

elyas: your friends from the two rivers aren't your pack mom: ohhhh 😔😠 elyas: neither was your wife mom: [GASP]

she loves hopper so much and i'm not ready for her to see ep8!!

brown sister trio introduced, we pause as i am tasked with writing down every ajah and what they do lmao

my mom repeatedly asked if suroth was a forsaken. probably because she has The Audacity to talk to an actual forsaken Like That!

not much reaction to aviendha at all this episode! i think my mom was a bit overwhelmed by all the new info being learned in this episode, so she was more concerned with trying to figure out who the aiel and the seanchan are than with paying attention to aviendha specifically (partially my fault bc i first explained the aiel as "those warrior people" and she thought i meant the seanchan lmao). she mourned that we hadn't started our character/terminology list on a bigger piece of paper!

i had to fight to keep it together rather than shout with joy during the gawyn namedrop djkjfgh

mom: did the red one free nynaeve so they could try to escape?? me: yes mom: she is just too complicated for me

in this same vein, my dad later referred to liandrin as a "double double agent"

moiraine: [big sigh] dad: she's always a drama queen

he's not wrong jkdjfg

ishy tenderly stroking rand's face also got no reaction, much to my surprise haha i meanwhile was silently losing it

when the seanchan were bringing out egwene and saying how powerful she is, my dad was like "but she's the wrong one, it's the other one who's powerful" oh my god let poor egwene LIVE djkfg even he is pulling a "did you hear that nynaeve is the most powerful channeler we've seen in 1000 years" on her!

my mom cracked up at moiraine saying "it's your choice rand, i mean it this time" and was like "yeah i was gonna say, is she ACTUALLY going to let him choose here?"

episode 6

my mom literally THE SECOND renna's bracelet linked with the a'dam: "so she can channel too? i thought these people punished everyone who can channel" not her INSTANTLY clocking The Sul'dam Secret when in-world it apparently took hundreds of years for anyone to notice hahaha this certainly lends weight to the "this information Is Known but routinely suppressed, as fascist governments are wont to do" interpretation over the "literally not a single person had any idea until the wondergirls" interpretation

lanfear: why do you think you can't trust me? mom: because you have a silly hat

911 lanfear's just been murdered. i guess some people (straight women) ARE immune to her dominatrix outfit djkfg

my mom also voiced her displeasure with rand's haircut again in this scene. my mom 🤝 me 🤝 mat

BOTH my parents thought lanfear's condition was going to be that rand had to kill moiraine himself! the second he opened his eyes they both said it! they're already thinking so dark!

on that note, i'd predicted my mom would be annoyed at moiraine for refusing barthanes's sandwiches, but that was not the case: instead, she and my dad both went "oh i bet the sandwiches are poisoned" they're so suspicious of everything now! and rightfully so

"i can hear you bickering from the fruit market" got a good laugh

my mom also gave a hearty, appreciative chuckle at mat shitting on rand's hair. he spoke for all of us!

mat: i'll meet you in an hour mom: they don't have watches, how will they know when it's been an hour?

mom when moiraine apologizes to barthanes: why is she being nice? me: because she feels bad mom, as if it never occurred to her moiraine might have a conscience: oh..............

mom when siuan arrives in cairhien: now someone can tell her about liandrin! me: but no one here knows that mom: UGH!!!

haha welcome to wheel of time! the necessary information is always stuck in the wrong plotlines and unable to be passed along to the relevant people!

elayne to nynaeve: if we help ryma, we can't help egwene mom: oh this poor woman, now she's faced with another hard choice just like in the arches! me: [sits there stunned because i never made that connection]

episode 7

my mom loved lan telling rand to tuck in his shirt, naturally

lan: heron dips over the wing [or whatever the name was] mom: what? me: it's a sword form, they all have weird names mom: oh, that would explain why it didn't make any sense

lan: your duty is to protect everyone in the world, not just the ones you love mom: that's a big responsibility :(

she laughed and said "she doesn't like not being the boss!" at nynaeve's face when elayne told her to do what she said

she is SO PRESSED about other characters needing to find out about liandrin. she was so excited when anvaere eavesdropped and then so mad when moiraine left before anvaere could tell her the news (but i reassured her by saying that moiraine is about to go to the same place as nynaeve & co who will be able to tell her)

moiraine: [is Mean to lan] mom: TUH! dad: he should just slay her

mom: so what does this tea do? me: allegedly it will show mat his past lives mom: but it might be a trick me: ishamael DOES call himself "father of lies"

my dad was like "that was cool!" after mat's bad trip, which is among his biggest reactions to anything, other than "[chuckles] that was a good one!" when egwene said "renna i will kill you"

ishy: i just want to close my eyes and never have to open them again mom: so kill yourself then 🙄

911 ishamael's also been found murdered. i think she could put the forsaken in line honestly, "you have a silly hat" "kill yourself" she's just not having any of their shit. i hate to compare her to cadsuane, but it's kinda giving cadsuane.

lanfear's dominatrix outfit did get more appreciation this time though when the silly hat was not present ("they had fun with her costumes")

rand: i need your help lanfear mom: ??????? doesn't he know she's evil???????

"she could at least say something nice to lan 🙄" when moiraine fails to say something nice to lan after getting unshielded thanks to him

lanfear: [broken amyrlin line] mom: is she broken??? me: i think she just meant metaphorically, not physically mom: oh. but their love is broken :(

episode 8

my dad actually put his laptop away to watch this episode with his full attention. this is high praise! he never does that!

mom: who's that? [dain] me: the whitecloak perrin spared when he escaped with aviendha mom: i don't remember that me: we watched that YESTERDAY mom: 🤷

she did remember after another moment though haha but that supports my impression that ep5 was A Bit Too Much New Info for her to take in all at once

lanfear: rand i'm the only one who truly cares about you mom: i don't think THAT'S true!

when perrin tells hopper to stay there: "he's just going to leave his dog out in the desert with no water???"

mom when lanfear calls ishy sweetheart and strokes his hair: wait was he the one she was in love with????? me: no it was rand's past life, that's why she's obsessed with rand mom: rand's past WIFE???? me: LIFE

babe wake up new polycule just dropped (lanfear/ishy/lews/ilyena)

she GASPED when renna cut off egwene's braid! as she should!

she said "too bad min isn't here" during the episode (she thought it would be helpful if min could tell mat what would happen if he were to touch the dagger; i was like "i think he knows it would be bad mom" lmao) and after the episode she anxiously asked if we would ever see min again, dammit mom don't you dare become a min stan on me jdkfgh (although, the fact that she thought we might not see her again indicates it's 0% on her radar that min might be anyone's love interest, which is interesting! a number of show-onlys were at least expecting her to be mat's i think)

nynaeve: i'll make you regret the first kiss your mother ever gave your father mom: [delighted] that's a creative one! dad: there are a lot of nasty women on this show and only one nasty man [ishy] me and mom: TUH!

although he is not wrong to say that s2 was the season of Female Villains and Women Being Mean (and i loved every moment of it!). don't you worry dad, rand's gonna be stepping up to fill the Nasty Man Quota soon enough. and i can't wait!

dad when rand is watching egwene from a distance: he's not doing a good job of hiding me: at least his cloak is the same color as the wall dad: well his dumb face isn't

why is he SUCH a hater when it comes to poor rand jkdjfg please, that's your future son-in-law!

they both were repeatedly pressed about everyone carrying the horn box (or rather "the briefcase" as my dad called it) out in the open

mom: they need to just put it in a sack! me: they don't have any sacks on hand! mom: there's plenty of sacks lying around!!!

she keeps thinking that rand got the heron-marked sword from his mom, and when she saw that turak had one she was like "but i thought those were the swords of the aiel?" and i cracked up imagining how offended aiel would be to hear her say that

she missed rand killing all the seanchan because she was too busy asking me the above question, but when she looked back at the screen she went 1) "oh, this is so gory" 2) "did RAND do all that????"

she was sad about ingtar, she was like "ohhhh, i liked him :(" imagine caring about ingtar, could not be me jdkfg

me: so lanfear is talking about the seals of the other forsaken, she wants this guy to throw them all in the ocean because she doesn't want them to be released mom: why doesn't she just do it herself? me: me: me: i don't know, actually..................

(maybe she just wanted them gone stat but didn't want to leave falme for even a moment while shit was going down with rand and ishy? or maybe she was like, I'm Too Hot And Iconic To Get My Hands Dirty Doing Things Myself)

mom as soon as renna's shown to be alive, after egwene's picked up the collar: she should go put the collar on her!

she been knew again!

mom at the mat-perrin reunion: put the spear down before you hug him, you'll stab someone by accident!!!!

she was glad to see egwene get her vengeance, but added "but now i bet she'll feel guilty for killing someone because she's a good person :("

ishy: [talking about what rand did in his past life] mom: rand doesn't even remember that! rand right on cue: i'm not lews therin!

i warned her "you might not want to look" just before hopper's death, but she did look, and she was very sad. as was i!

she thought that one of the heroes of the horn was stepin and i told her it wasn't (it was just some random guy with similar hair) but maybe i should've let her keep on believing it because it's a nice idea!

mom when the spear goes through ishy and hits rand: OH NO!!!! just like min said!!! me: [vibrating with glee over The Great Cauthor Stabbening]

when ishy said "i'm sorry old friend" to rand here my dad said "that sounds familiar" and i was like what's he talking about? but then realized that's what LTT said to ishy in the cold open!!! my heart!!! thank you dad for catching that parallel, i gotta go make a gifset now

"how is one guy holding off all these soldiers by himself?" mom i cannot believe you of all people would doubt lan!

she laughed at rand being like "[half-dead] who are you???" but made no comment on the subsequent romantic shot of elayne. however, after the episode she was like "'who are you?' rand said................is something going to happen with him and elayne??" and i was like 🤷😁😁😁😁 and then she said "but they both have red hair, are they from the same place?" and i told her that elayne is not aiel and not ALL redheads are aiel lmao and maybe i should've just said "you'll see" but. i don't think it's a spoiler to confirm that elayne is not aiel.

she does not believe that ishy is really dead, and she kept asking me if he was really dead and if he shows up again later in the books and i swear, the three oaths possessed me in that moment and made me incapable of saying "yes he's really dead, no we don't see him again in the books". so i just kept shrugging which probably made it obvious that indeed, this is not the last we see of him haha

mom when moiraine starts weaving fire in the direction of the tower: what's she doing?! everyone's up on that tower!!! me: she's not trying to BLOW UP RAND mom: oh

at some point during all the battles she was like "now what's lanfear up to during all this? 🤨" a good thought to have always!

at the end of the episode: "now we have to wait a whole year or two for the next season!!!!!" she's hooked!!

favorite character roundup: my mom said lan is #1 and egwene is #2, and she also loves loial, and she said that she didn't care for perrin last season but likes him a lot now. my dad said his favorites are "the tree guy" (loial) and "the new woman at the end who's more powerful than anyone we've seen so far" (moghedien! that one was a surprise to me. tumblr 🤝 my dad. i hope he'll enjoy The Season Of Moghedien next season! tho it could also be that he just said her because she was the last character we saw and he'd already forgotten all the other ones lmao)

[mamuzzy]

— Is “psycho” a slur? —

My easiest answer to this question: ASK IF A REAL PERSON IS OKAY TO BE CALLED A PSYCHO. If not, then you are not calling the person with ASPD, BPD, or any other PD a psycho.

Listen to the people with personality disorders, not the people who claim they are allys so they call everything ableist that can hurt our pretty sensitive disabled heart. There is a chance that someone is made the label their own. And someone is not okay with it. No, you don't make a fucking a poll where everyone can vote, and even the neighbours cat can puke on the reblog button. YOU TALK TO A REAL PERSON, YOU ASK. End of story.

Personality disorders and especially Antisocial Personality Disorder are often associated to “being a psycho”.

And you especially met with this term in RepComm while reading.

“EWWWW REPCOMM AND KAREN TRAVISS AND KAL SKIRATA IS FUCKIGN ABLEIST DON’T READ IT OR YOU’LL BECOME ABLEIST YOURSE-“

When I mention TODAY to someone that I have personality disorder, people are being like: okay and you are eating that with fork or spoon?

You call out ableism because you heard it somewhere that being called a psycho is ableist, and calling out ableism gives you browney points on tumblr.

“Psycho” is not a slur. Sometimes not even the self-diagnosed psyhopaths know about the existence of the term of ASPD (that's how personality disorders are not in every speech!!!), they just now that something is wrong, because they always hit walls around people. Psycho or sociopath was the closest that you could name this condition in the early 2000's.

Nulls being called a psycho is not Kal Skirata’s elaborate trick to enslave the nulls or whatever the fuck anti-kal people comes up with. People with pd-s are mostly self-aware. Being always fucking self-aware is why we know that we don’t fit in.

Someone with personality disorder is extremely important to be self-aware, that's why name-erasing, mental-health erasing cause more harm. You don't say shit like to a pd that "you are completely normal, there is nothing wrong with you, carry on" because the next time we actually do something mentally ill™, you will be the first to call us "fucking psychos".

(yeah. I know. so much we, and them, and us, like I'm one with ASPD too, I'm trying to figure if I have more personality disorder than BPD, and probably have.)

In this age where everything is within reach via internet, people truly forget that media is accessible written by different generations, and when I see younger people engaging with the Republic Commando series TODAY in 2024 with today’s tumblr sensitivity standards, I think: vod. Are you aware that the first book came out in 2004, TWENTY YEARS AGO? The accessibility to everything is great but it totally messes up the ability to see TIME CONTEXT. And this time blindness can truly mess up communication between different generations too, causing rifts and we end up invalidating other’s experiences if we are not careful.

“But there were more progressive books even before 2004” - Probably. Only we didn’t have an entire library of progressive labels of genders, sexuality, phobias and MENTAL ILLNESSES AND CONDITIONS.

Not in everyday speech. If no one talks about it, you won't know the concept. You don't know how to ask questions aside from "what's wrong with me?"

WATCH OUT! SLURS INCOMING!!!!

In the early 2000’s and before if your teachers hated you, your parents weren’t educated (or just didn’t care), or your parents themselves never got proper treatment for their neurodivergency, there is chance that YOU ALSO didn’t have a chance to get a proper diagnosis for different types of neurodivergency as a child.

children with dyscalculia were called lazy.

children with dyslexia were called retards who can't even read.

children who were fine playing alone were the weird ones.

autistic people? You mean rain man? Or those braindead retards shitting themselves and throwing fits and should have been euthanized if their parents had any love for them? Oh no you are not autistic, stop being oversensitive to noises and shit and people bullying you for your special interests is not bullying, they are just trying to involve you sweetheart.

ADHD? Problem children with behavior issues.

Antisocial Personality Disorder? Psychos. Problem children. HOOLIGANS. DEVIANTS.

Sounds familiar? No? Then I am truly happy for you.

People like to use this quote to prove that the Nulls didn’t have mental illnesses, it’s just Kal who spread the rumors about them, and the Nulls weren’t more than your ordinary bad behaving children. Because Vau is an outsider, therefore more reliable and objective narrator about the Nulls and because fuckkalskirataingeneral. Yeah. Sure. But we are talking about Walon Vau.

Walon “my father beat the living shit out of me as a child but I turned out fine” Vau.

These kind of abused people In real life with the exact same mentality tell you that you don’t have a problem, you are just oversensitive. You don’t need therapy, you just have to man up. Don’t take pills because pills are for pussies. YOU DON’T HAVE MENTAL ILLNESS, YOU ARE JUST A BAD CHILD. Generational trauma is fucking shit and affects everybody.

Walon Vau alone deserves a separate post about his non-existent mental health. And Sev, now that he was mentioned here. Sev is especially heartbreaking, seeing how Nulls as psychos are treated, and how Sev as a psycho is treated in the books.

This blurb is born from the thought that the Nulls are having Antisocial Personality Disorder and I’ve come to this conclusion because they are constantly called psychos, the most common label people used for this kind of behavior patterns they show throughout the series.

ASPD or Antisocial Personality Disorder and the usage of this name is encouraged in scientific circles because the symptoms and traits of psychopathy can’t be measured objectively anymore. Psychopathy is a neurological/hormonal condition, but no longer its own sickness, because other non-related disorders, diseases and illnesses can mimic the symptoms of psychopathy for eg.: DEMENTIA.

If you ever wonder how can a 80 years old person who never showed any sign of aggression before just go and brutally kill their neighbor for a sole treebranch hanging over the fence and littering the garden with leaves, there is a chance that something is not alright in the brain anymore.

Emotions developed healthy with healthy self-restraints and and self-control will not let you do socially unacceptable things like killing to solve problems, just because your brain tells you: BASH THEIR FUCKING SKULL WITH A ROCK.

Every emotional response are hormones and neurotransmitters in work. Brain is responsible to give the appropriate response to each situation we are facing. If you have hormonal problems, or neurological conditions, different brain structure than a neurotypical people, there is a chance, that these responses are not working as they are intended, you will have different or more extreme emotional responses to things, or not having at all.

So that is why we don’t use the terms of psychopath today as an individual sickness, because PSYCHOPATHY ITSELF IS A SYMPTOM of various conditions! People with psychopathy, the “psychos” are usually on the spectrum of ASPD.

So again, repeat after me like I'm Dora the explorer who put you on gunpoint:

ASK IF A REAL PERSON WITH ASPD IS OKAY WITH BEING CALLED A PSYCHO. IF NOT, YOU DON'T CALL THE PERSON PSYCHO. END OF STORY.

[sophieinwonderland]

Episode 4 of Responding to the "Sophie is Dangerous Doc": On Genders and Slurs

If you haven't seen my other posts on this:

Episode 1 (Block Evasion Allegations) Episode 2 (All Tibetan Buddhists are Monks) Episode 3 (Survivor's Network) Episode 3.5 (Hate Groups)

Let's just get right into this!

First, just noting that I absolutely H*TE the culture online around censoring sl*rs where this is a t*rrible word nobody should say, BUT it's totally okay if you replace ONE vowel with an asterisk. Mostly because, when reading it in their heads, I'm certain most everyone is going to instantly read the slur as the slur, and it should be just as triggering to those who would be triggered by it. This isn't specifically an issue with the author but more collective st*pidity of the internet.

Here I went through the trouble of, after realizing I had messed up, to at least replace the whole word with "the T-slur" when all I needed to do was write "tr*nny." Silly me. (This is the only time I'll be writing it that way in this post. I just really need to illustrate how stupid I find this whole thing.)

This bare-minimum censorship while being outraged over saying a slur is just a tad too ridiculous to me to take seriously.

Context...

This came about during an argument with someone over the word endogenic. They were arguing, in essence, that because the word "endogenous" may have had vague ties to Freud fakeclaiming trauma, the word "endogenic" was bad because it's the same word.

My point was to illustrate how even if this was true and endogenous was offensive, two words can sound similar and have the same roots with similar literal meanings with one still being offensive and the other not. The example I gave was how trans/transgender are perfectly fine terms while the t-slur is bad despite both having the same roots and literal meanings. Connotations of specific words matter. Not just their roots.

I apologized after seeing how that affected people because I wasn't aware of the severity of the term.

Derogatory terms aren't all equal, and while there are certain pejoratives that you never should say, ever... others are generally acceptable in neutral contexts when not using them as an insult.

My mistake here was not being educated in which category this particular pejorative fell under.

On our gender...

A huge part of this narrative is the idea that I just suddenly for the first time ever decided to identify as genderfluid because I was under fire.

This is, like much of what is said in this document, completely false.

I had previously posted about how being a system with multiple genders makes our system's body more accurately described as genderfluid.

This post was back in August of 2022. Well before the slur discourse in May of 2023.

I believe there were other posts but they're hard to find because Tumblr searches are bad. (I used google to find this one.)

The idea that the body/system is technically genderfluid isn't something I invented out of thin air for that one discussion, but is something that had been on my mind for a long time, and something I had talked about before.

While I won't blame the author for not having an encyclopedic knowledge of every post I ever made. This is yet another instance of accusations and assertions without ever even bothering to confirm if they were true.

This lack of due diligence is a massive theme in the "Sophie is dangerous" document.

If anyone had asked me if I had made public statements referring to our body being genderfluid, I could have answered and provided a source.

In fact, the author quotes me saying that I've always considered the body genderfluid, even highlighting it...

But didn't once think, as any reasonable person would have in this situation, that there may be evidence of this out there.

Instead, the author lazily repeats the lie that this was something new I just suddenly decided for the sake of this one argument.

Transness...

There are a couple problems.

First, let's start with the point near the end about being queer. Because my point was more than that.

It was that genderfluidity is not merely queer, but specifically on the transgender spectrum as seen below:

My position is actually that any system with fronting headmates of a different gender than their AGAB is genderfluid to an extent. And because of this, is on the transgender spectrum. (Regardless of whether they identify as transgender or not.)

Slipper Slopes and Bad Precedents.

This is a ridiculous take meant to try to villainize me. And is a bit of revisionist history at that.

I initially apologized and did explain that the intent was not to reclaim the term, and that I didn't feel comfortable reclaiming it. I stand by that.

I didn't cast myself as a victim over people being upset by it.

After my apology, I listened to numerous transgender systems who were uncomfortable with the topic that arose from that, and uncomfortable with the people taking issue with a girl in an AMAB body using the T-slur.

There is a lot of underlying complexity here that I believe needed to be addressed.

Because simply apologizing without addressing these other issues sets a precedent that I didn't want to be setting.

I wasn't going to let the takeaway from that conversation be "individual headmates can't reclaim slurs, even ones they could be called, unless they directly identify by the specific term for the experiences they have."

I've never been called the T-slur. But as more systems are out publicly and headmates of different genders are expressing their gender, it's likely that they'll be victims of transphobia.

Systems with multiple genders are, as a whole, genderfluid.

Genderfluidity is on the transgender spectrum. Regardless of whether they identify as transgender or not.

And it's pretty weird to try to police the language people on the transgender spectrum use based on whether they specifically call themselves transgender or not.

My biggest problem with the whole discourse around that topic is that it ultimately presents an intrusive ideology that is super concerned with policing the specific terms GNC people use and identify by. And worse, it presents the gender of systems as less important than those who have varying genders for other reasons.

The precedents you set don't exist in a vacuum. The fact is that you are arguing this at the same time that sysmeds have resorted to maliciously misgendering endogenic systems, justifying it under the basis that it's not actual misgendering because the headmate with those genders aren't real.

Something which, if you remember from the previous episode, the OP of the "Sophie is dangerous document" doesn't believes counts as real misgendering.

In the end, it's a very slippery slope from "female headmates in AMAB bodies with gender dysphoria can't reclaim transgender slurs" to "gender discrimination against headmates is totally separate to that faced by trans people and misgendering headmates isn't as bad as misgendering real transgender people."

And this is a slippery slope the author of the document appears to have fallen straight down and crashed face-first on.