#not even in an rpf tinhatting way most of the time. but in the am i nuts or are these guys talking about gay sex. way

[pulsedmaggot]

me when i smoke: slipknot are such an emotional travesty that no matter which two band members you put side by side to each other you could come away with such an intense backstory between the two of them from multiple points in their lives. this band loves each other like a wellness checker whose emails you forget to write back. this band cant stand each other. this band is beautiful

me when im sober: does anyone else think ross robinson and joey jordison explored each others bodies. just me? ok. what about ross robinson and corey taylor. just me again? ok

[brakingpoint]

i love it when you get sustantiatedly bitchy about things that don't really matter like ships, so i'd love you to talk about some of the ones you feel most strongly about, but tbh now i am also curious what you DO see

strongly tempted to put "i love it when you get substantiatedly bitchy about things that don't really matter" in my bio 👍🏻

anyway i feel like most of my examples are honestly not down to anything wrong with that particular ship but moreso overall trends in f1blr shipping (and i think i have set forward this exact thesis before so apologies for repeating myself but i love getting bitchy as much as you love to read it so i will yap about it again 😁) so it's probably more productive for me to just moan about those. perhaps with examples. just to swing the bat at the hornets' nest a little bit harder

in my opinion all of these trends are also interconnected - although they may at first seem contradictory - and feed into and amplify each other's respective flaws to create one big mess of mediocre shipping

trend one: trying to make fetch (yaoi) happen for every combo of teammates, rivals, drivers who came up through feeder series together regardless of if there is any chemistry or even anything remotely interesting about the dynamic

trend two: when there is no chemistry or canonically compelling feature to a certain combo, instead of doing the tried and true crackship method of getting a bit silly with it and going "hey would this be fucked up/funny/sexy/cute or what" everythingggg has to be about overwrought tinhat soulmateism, which is what makes trend one so exhausting. you can't be telling me you actually think every single teammate combo on the grid are actually star crossed lovers with abundant genuine and compelling yaoi fodder. it's not possible

trend three: everyone on here has the attention span and object permanence of a six month old cocomelon addict and so instead of respecting and sticking to the genuinely fantastic "vintage" (read: they were teammates/friends 2-5 years ago and don't interact as much publicly anymore) ships that exist for several drivers the overwhelming trend is for people to flock to the next big thing (read: whatever two drivers are standing next to each other for this season). it's kind of like migratory slash fandom but it's even weirder because it's happening all within one fandom, and half the time you're abandoning a genuinely good fun interesting ship for something that fits trends one & two and is therefore, to me, a bit shit

anyway examples of ships i just don't really Get for one or more of the above reasons include: a lot of contemporary lando ships (i'm not actually saying this because i'm a lando hater on track. when it comes to yaoi i do not discriminate and i think carlando is an all time banger f1 rpf staple. which is why i'm baffled by so many people acting like landoscar is anywhere near a worthy replacement); certain other teammate ships like britcedes, alex/logan (🕊️), zhou/bottas; even (please don't kill me) lestappen to an extent which i don't mind and have even written multiple fics for but i think people are taylor swift easter egging it a bit too hard at this point

on the other hand some of the ships i DO still like and Get include: strollonso (genuinely top ship to me at this point, peak contemporary teammate ship), piarles (idk if this has fallen victim to the Vintage Ship issue as much as i think or if i just perceive it that way bc half the pierre blogs on here have me blocked), some maxiel (lowkey prefer it when treated as a Vintage Ship as opposed to trying very hard to prove it's still alive and kicking today), carlando as already mentioned, whatever was going on between lando and max fewtrell and their possibly shared girlfriend a couple of years back, charlos (another strong contemporary teammate ship), sebmark, and of course my beautiful iconic eternal brocedes. OH and max/gp 😜

[demirose-colored-glasses]

My page looks better on desktop

➳ I'm Ro. I'm in my late 20s. Please don't gender me. I'm a queer enigma. They/Them works just fine.

➳ My page looks better on desktop and I can't follow back, this is a side blog. I will interact though.

➳ I'm Demiromantic, for me this means that I can't feel romantic attraction towards people unless I have a close emotional bond with them, for me that's friendship/a platonic bond. Hence the joke in my title. (This doesn't mean I am attracted to all my friends, just that I can't feel romantic attraction to people I'm not close with.)

➳ Current hyperfixations/special interests: (most active in bold) Psych (coming back from childhoood), Glee, Stardew Valley, The Summer I Turned Pretty (I love all these characters and they can be as petty and messy as they'd like.), Arrowverse, Harry Potter (I do not support JKR and I fully acknowledge that the goblins are antisemitic, nagini and cho chang are offensive, and that her treatment of indigenous cultures is unacceptable)

Buffy The Vampire Slayer (I'm late I'm sorry)

➳ Flag in banner/background is the demiromantic flag color picked from The Summer I Turned Pretty cover.

➶ I post Demiromantic and other aspec headcanons. Mostly focus on demiromantic/demisexual though. These may be hot takes, and are strictly through the lens of my own experience and you don't have to agree, in fact I vibe with canon or whatever headcanons you may have.

➶ Feel free to send asks and interact in any way possible.

➶ I'll also make icons or color picked flags at some point if people want them. There aren't very many demiromantic headcanons.

➶ reblogging an edit or a fic doesn't mean I ship the ship, I just support Fandom creators. So if you see me saying I don't ship something, then you see it in my reblogs, I'm just supporting Fandom creators.

➵ Allies, non-queer, and people uneducated on queerness are obviously welcome, this is not, nor will it ever be a queer-only space. Despite this you MUST be able to understand that is a queer amatopunk space. It rejects amatonormativity. This means that despite loving the romance genre and experiencing some romantic attraction I will be critical of amatonormativity and allonormativity.

➵I am neutral on RPF most of the time but have zero interest and will not reblog it.

➵ I am neutral on "bad" fandom content existing. As long as they're not harassing real people I'm not even looking in their direction, they tend to trigger me so I don't engage.

➴ Despite being neutral on rpf existing, "Tinhats" can fuck right off. Especially if you talk to the people involved about it or in any way harass them. I hope you have a bad day every day forever.

➴ I'm typically not interested in large age gaps ships where one person is a teenager but I don't think they're evil or whatever fanpolice are on about. Also proshippers are racist trash 99% of the time so don't lump me in with those assholes either please.

🏹 My writing (Dead link for now)

🏹 My Media Takes/Overviews

Tags:

#demirose glasses on - headcanoning characters to be on the aspec in any way shape or form, sometimes used for general queer headcanons as well.

#demirose glasses off - just a general speculation post about a piece of media.

#my stuff - edits I made

[awsugar]

I don’t understand why some big mcr blogs slate anyone who believes gerard and frank had a thing, like our view didn’t arise from nowhere there’s clearly evidence that has led us to think this. I get disliking those who push frerard in frank and Gerard’s faces (barely anyone does this nowadays) but slating people for believing they had something in the past is kinda ridiculous imo. Franks solo music speaks volumes but if you read into it you’re demonised as a frerardie

mmmmm am i down to clown today... ok i will speak.

actually im going to put this under a cut bc my last ask was a long one and i feel like i am going to talk about this for way too long bc its 1am and im honestly a little tipsy.

note: i just finished answering this it took me an embarrassingly long amount of time and i dont think the person who asked this is even going to read it but i apparently have a lot of thoughts and no one ever wants to listen to me lol 

firstable yea actually unfortunately anytime they do a livestream, or anytime anyone SOMEHOW RELATED to them does a livestream. there are ppl in the chat talking about frerard. they both have comments off on insta now, i didnt actually read the comments that much and franks have been off for ages but im positive there were people in the comments talking about frerard. i mean fuck, franks LAST tweet he qrted someone who tagged him in the replies of a pic of The Kiss. so i mean yea its definitely not a majority but it still happens extremely frequently.

this is like. genuinely really funny to me bc im sure frank didnt see it, i think he knows enough not to look at the chat for the most part. but the moral is that its 2021 and people STILL dont know how to act. i wont go on about it but it actively enrages me anytime i watch a stream. rule one of real person fandoms is keep all that shit in your fan spaces. which is actually why i prefer tumblr. none of them are on here. actively engaging in mcr fandom on twitter is too close for comfort, especially since frank follows a handful of my friends and also like. knows me.

so like moral of my most times unavoidable wall of text is that ppl are right to be frustrated with the fans who act this way. i am extremely frustrated with them. and i think for the people who have never like tinhatted or anything, this type of behavior stands out and makes an impression and becomes the like. poster child for ppl who are like 'hmmmmm but what if.' about the frank and gerard stuff.

anyway, moving on, i think a lot of peoples hang up is that they view it as rpf. which i have a couple things to say about actually. its no secret that i have read a lot of rpf. i had never heard of fanfiction until i started getting into mcr in 2008. that was my introduction. and at the time, in that community, it was completely normal. and it was for a loooooooooong time. i knew of people who didnt read fic or felt weird about it but the majority of people i interacted with DID read fic. and on top of that, the people who didn;t were nothing like they are today. we all got along. no one was like demonizing people who did read fic. in 2012 when i think mcr tumblr was at its peak, ALL of the most popular blogs were "frerardies" (hate that term). they all talked about and recced fic and a lot of them wrote it too. everyone had a boyfriends tag. anyway when i came BACK to the mcr fandom in 2016 after a couple years away post-breakup it was still like that. people talked about fic all the time and you didnt have to like, hide it in fear of being labeled as a terrible person.

i always discussed this stuff, fic and theories, openly on this blog. for YEARS. the first time i noticed the rpf shift was 2019 tbh, when my blog was suspended and i (not related) had a mental health crisis and i spent a handful of months off tumblr, when i remade on a different blog suddenly it seemed like people were like noooo you cant talk about that. ppl who read fic are disgusting. if you think something happened between them you're homophobic. i was like honestly baffled bc i didnt know how it had seemingly changed so much in a matter of like 4 months or so. but thats the society we live in now lmao.

anyway the other thing about rpf is that i think most of these people are hypocrites. bc almost everyone makes an exception for unholyverse. theyre like ok i will dabble in the most popular fic and see what its about while still demonizing the people who read OTHER fics. like ugh.

also i have noticed its an age thing. a lot of the time. almost every mcr fan i personally interact with or know, which is a lot of people, read fic, used to read fic and just sort of grew out of it, and/or (usually and) believe something happened between them. but everyone i interact with is an adult and all of my closer friends are long time mcr fans like me. i feel like the percentage of fans who are minors who are extremely anti-rpf is way higher than the percentage of adults. and i think thats just due to the fan culture we grew up with and the fact that young people a lot of times are like..it seems very performative in an attempt to be the least problematic person that ever lived.

also random side note its really funny to keep updated with this debate on twitter. they literally yoyo there. frerard is ok on a bi-weekly basis.

anyway back to what i was originally saying which was that people view tinhatting as rpf and therefor not okay. which like idk maybe i sound crazy but i also always said this when i was in the phandom and discussing like dan and phil and whether or not they were soulmates before they came out, i don't think tinhatting is rpf. or like. idk theres a part of me that can see why people think rpf is a bad thing even though if i was famous i wouldnt care if people wrote fics about me. but like. analyzying the real life things that people have done and said in public (important). in order to try to contextualize their relationship or understand that dynamic better. well i mean first of all its not fiction. but like i do think its a lot different than writing explicit bdsm fic about them.

and i know a lot of the people on here who dont like actively participate in these conversations do like. see where we're coming from. with the frank lyrics and millions and like all of that stuff. they just dont talk about it. i mean *I* have stopped mostly talking about it at all unless its vague, due to the current climate and opinion. and sometimes we'll all have a moment of hysteria where we've all decided its ok to speak about. me right now apparently.

anyway im positive no one read all of this. i need to learn how to be brief but ive been saying that my whole life. but you're right. to me its clear that there's a bigger story behind it than frank and gerard just being buddies who were in a band together. a logical conclusion. and i wish we could just all get along again instead of people being sooooo mad about it.

[littlewetbeast]

hey rosa :) hope it's okay if i ask this. i'm kind of new to cockles things so i've been doing some "research" lol. i'm kind of asking around the fandom for opinions. do you actually think it's real? what convinced you? thanks and hope you are doing ok!

hey anon!! of course it is!! you’re welcome to send me as many asks as you’d like. putting this under a readmore because it got kinda long.

so - this is kind of awkward i guess, but i’ll get right into it. i have always steered clear of any form of rpf and tinhatting. this stuff is still... a little bit weird to me. the whole “i don’t do rpf but why are jensen and misha like That” is a running joke in the cockles fandom for a reason and i’m 100% part of that crowd. this is the only instance i have engaged in this type of fandom content. i don’t even really “ship” them, i just enjoy gifs, videos and some fandom discussion, i guess? not saying this gives me some moral high ground, i just want to give some perspective. i only very, very recently started watching cons and like. i guess i just never realised how insanely well they got along? the energy is just off the charts. i figured they were like this with everyone but it was quickly clear that this was a Them thing, which is - kind of sweet. i’d kind of scoffed before at people suggesting jensen had a crush on misha but i thought it was embarrassingly obvious after watching their interactions.  what i will say, from my own pov, is that even if certain suspicions are correct -  that jensen and misha ARE indeed in an open, loving, poly relationship - it is very unlikely they will ever publicly confirm this. THAT, to me, would be needed to confirm that it’s “real”. and that’s never going to happen, because #society. so i always try to keep myself grounded in that i am kind of making some observations about some celebrities and trying to consume what they give us in a respectful way, and just enjoying seeing how lovely they are with one another. so i will say - rather than arguing whether it is “real” or not - that i instead consider that there are things they have done/things i’ve seen which simply make more sense if they are in a relationship. it doesn’t really bother me if i’m mistaken, because they’re still providing me with some sweet, sweet serotonin in these difficult times. win/win either way. THAT SAID... i’ll tell you what i struggle to find bff-only explanations for.

i’ll just start off by sending you some stuff in case you want to look it up. i think a good place to start is @livebloggingmydescentintomadness‘s cockles manifesto here. NOW... i will say there is a lot of evidence (in my opinion) such as the ‘near kisses’, clothes swapping, performative flirting, etc. that i felt maaaaybe could suggest something, but it didn’t convince me. if you’re insane, you can browse the j2 tinhatting theories and compare - a lot of friendly behaviour jensen does is something he does with his close friends in general. so it often felt too circumstantial and could be explained away. so i’ll start with that, so you know where i am at.

the thing that made me really raise my eyebrows the first time was, after watching misha and jensen interact like They Do, seeing how jared reacted to them. he loves innuendo and does the gay chicken/fratboy gay humour all the time. but there are numerous cases where his face is SO exasperated when jensen openly gushes about misha and where he makes slight jabs at jensen regarding misha. the first time i saw it i was like - oh, that’s how i tease my friends in a relationship. okay.

one thing that stands out to me is his look of contained panic at someone mentioning photos jensen has of misha and asking to ‘release them’, and then the VISIBLE ‘oh thank fuck’ when they clarify. LIKE WHAT. WHY. why is he reacting like this if they’re just?? you know?

if you watch jibcon 2019, after the straddlegate incident, he WILL NOT stop making gay jokes towards misha and jensen - to the point where they get extremely uncomfortable, i have some Feelings about this that i may elaborate on later. like. he just will not stop. it just goes waaay beyond his typical fratboy gay jokes.

there are other things too, to be honest, but i think eventually it just became the sum of a lot of things. the fact that jensen and misha have extremely explicit queer inside jokes? that jensen got a boner from being straddled by him? i mean. sigh. it’s either bi4bi best friends with-intimate-knowledge-of-each-other’s-sex-lives OR it’s. you know. something more than that.

those are probably the things that have swayed me the most. there are a lot of other things that added to this, and if you slide some cockles goggles on you start to see a lot of behaviour that make you go, ‘huh, if they are in a relationship it sure would explain [this] and [this] and [this]’. that’s all i’ll say.

[jensensitive]

it's been so long and my memory is so poor that i really can't remember exactly. I know it was pretty gradual, but my problem is that i can't just lowkey ship something, so i was kind of always doomed. I think for me it was some combination of the ring and misha's reaction when alona asked him if he'd kissed jensen and the chicon j2m panel and just every instance in those first couple years of their talking about each other, cause we for sure got more of that than we did actual interaction outside of the show. All of on top of dean and cas's chemistry, which was probably the most important ingredient, because we all know where that chemistry came from. And this was all experienced for me in the chill, fun environment of mishaland where cockles was kind of born i think. I can't recall cockles ever being taken too seriously there, because nothing was really, but it was definitely where i first experienced it, and ofc it was all in the context of a giant, fictional, polyamorous cult, so the issue of 'but they have girlfriends/wives' was never mentioned much. It was all just a joke, just as valid if not less so than mishalecki at the time, but at some point (hi jib 2011, fancy meeting you here /fancy meeting you here), i started to realize oh shit they're flirting, they are really into each other, and that realization was i think much more internal and private, and embarrassing in a way that's hard to describe because I found myself doubting what was true a lot, just wondering a lot, and at the time i wasn't even sure if j2 wasn't a thing. Like 2010 was peak blind item time iirc, so i was already fairly convinced that jensen was gay, and then at some point it turned into my thinking all the gossip might actually be based on j/m, and outside of the e! forums or maybe an anon comm and maybe jokingly talking about it with a friend, i basically just suffered alone in not knowing the truth lmao and feeling totally haunted by it lmao. Obsessing over rpf ships to that extent is apparently unhealthy whoulda thunk. But anyway, long story short, i ended up tinhatting for a while, making some friends through it and learning a lot about myself and others along the way, and i don't regret any of it 🌈 But i am glad to (i think) be past the obsessiveness and just be able to enjoy their love for each other in a way that's better for my mental health lmao. I will say though that i still get that urge to chase the cockles high, if you'll allow the turn of phrase, because it has brought me so much intense joy, like it's an otp for sure, and having an otp is like being in love, and you legitimately experience all the hormones that go along with that, that's physically real for sure. They've just made me so intensely happy, that i do get that itch to try to feel that again by rewatching videos or whatever, but i gotta fight it cause i don't wanna get sucked in again when it's so easy to be lmao. When you're depressed and few things bring you joy or make you feel anything or hold you interest, it's easy to cling to those things and find comfort in them. Sometimes it's great to, sometimes it's life saving. But being able to step back from those things and appreciate them without grasping at them is really great too.

idk why i wrote all this lol, only like half of it was related to the question

Informal Jen/Mish Survey:

Fav if Cockles / Jen/Mish  is your first and/or only real person ship.

Reblog if you never even meant to ship it but those assholes made it impossible (include the moment that did it for you if you like).

Both if both. I might compile the “how I started to ship it” stories in a new post if y’all want.

Possibly of interest to @weathergirl83 @silvie111 @casloveshisfreckles @naruhearts @jensensitive @castiel-left-his-mark-on-me @whyjm @yourfavoritedirector @lilnerdydudewithwings @super-powerful-queen-slayyna @casthegrumpy @destielette @daughter-of-the-rain-and-snow @amyoatmeal @princesscas and probably lots of others…