#nootieml

[nootgi]

My only regret - Xiao

A/N: PHEW it’s been a while huh? this one is a big one that i spent over 3 months writing so if there are some inconsistencies im sorry T^T 

Word count: 5255

Great spears of rock rained down across the blood soaked plains, the sky turned red from the burning embers. The colours of war tainted the white petals of the flowers that once bloomed across those plains. 

It was after a rather gruesome battle that Xiao met you, you had been in the center of a busy medical tent. You had your hair pushed back and an intense look on your face as you began to run the medicinal herbs into a soldier’s wound. All the while instructing fellow healers around you to prepare the supplies for the next wave of injured. Xiao helped the team carry in fellow soldiers, laying his comrade down gently on the bed as the healers swarmed him instantly. The blood made him feel sick to his stomach but he couldn’t let it show. As an adeptus he must embrace this pain and become stronger, so nothing like this can happen ever again. He stood on the side, losing himself in his thoughts to strengthen his resolve again. He was broken out of his thoughts when he felt a soft warm hand touch his cold arm. Xiao jumped at the touch, not expecting or used to the touch of another person. When his head snapped to the culprit you sheepishly smiled and held up the bandages whilst gesturing to the cut on his arm. 

“I don’t need your-” 

“Everyone deserves treatment in this tent so let me just put this bandage on.” You cut him off, the smile on your face instantly turning into a serious one. In this war you had had your fair share of soldiers that lost hope and gave up on the second chance you gave them. You could never forget the overwhelming guilt when soldiers wake up and sob at the thought of going back out into the front lines. Sensing your sincerity, Xiao let his arm up to allow you to delicately wrap the bandages around his wound. His gaze lingered on you for a few seconds until he turned his head away, the tips of his ears were red. Around you he saw a warm yellow glow, it soothed his tense muscles and he felt the unfamiliar feeling of relief. You were too bright. 

On your end you so desperately wanted to speak to him, knowing he was an adeptus piqued your curiosity and there were so many questions brewing in your mind. Do you just ask how his day has been? NO because we’re in a war, the answer is kinda obvious! Do you ask about how it is being an adeptus? You’ve been told your questions are too awkward to answer but this curiosity was burning inside of you. Just as you found the right way to start your conversation you already patched him up. You stared at the perfectly tied bandage with wide eyes. How’s this happening? Xiao felt you freeze up and looked back at you, the look on your face caused a frown to form on his face. Did he do something wrong? Or is this mortal broken? The two of you sat in silence for a few seconds till he just sighed and stood up. He took his polearm in one hand and his mask in the other. Once he reached the exit of the tent he turned around sharply to face you, who was still by where you treated him. You were in a deep conversation with the captain of the unit that just came in, the aura around was different to the one he felt moments ago. It felt less childish and more composed like the colour blue. He drank in the sight of you knowing it’ll most likely be the last time he saw you due to the chaos of battle and just because of who he was.

 If there was ever anything human he knew to stay away from, he knew it was you. A mystery in mundane life was much more daunting than any demon to Xiao. 

That was meant to be the last time Xiao saw you but it seems the stars had different plans for the two of you. During a face off, Xiao lost control of his guard and released some of the negative energy that built up inside of him. The energy instantly gravitated to his wounds and corrupted them, making it almost impossible to heal in time for the final battle. He insisted that he could

fight in the final battle however his wounds made his usual speed slower and his trusty polearm felt heavier and heavier to carry. The other yakshas, noticing his stubbornness, had to inform Morax who had more control over the adeptus and his decisions. Not wanting to see his friend go down a path of self destruction, he advised Xiao to take a healer and purify the wound. The quicker he got it healed, the quicker he could recover and support on the battlefield. Morax reassured Xiao that they could hold off without him and sent Xiao off to the medical camps to find a healer that was willing to travel across the destroyed landscape in search of qingxing untouched by the darkness or blood. He knew that it was a tall order to ask for since many healers chose their job to help out in war whilst avoiding the violence. He didn’t want to force anyone into danger just for him but he had a duty to help Morax and build the nation of Liyue. He could go alone but he knew he couldn’t act recklessly. If you rush you’ll make mistakes that can never be undone and Xiao couldn’t allow that. Just as he was about to give in to going alone, you came running out of the medical tent with a bag slung over your shoulder and clothes different to your usual medical garments. 

“Xiao!” You call after him, your hair wildly bounced as you ran up to him which resembled the flower petals that bopped in the wind. You tried reading his face as you walked up but were unable to do so.

“What is it?” His brows slightly furrowed, feeling an odd pit in his stomach. 

“I heard you were looking for a healer to accompany you! I didn’t hear until now but I’m lucky to have caught you!” Your words fell out of your mouth like a waterfall, he had difficulty keeping up. 

“Very well then, come along.” He said after a few moments, no doubt trying to piece together everything you said. You weren’t expecting him to say yes so quickly and easily but that just shows how desperate he was to join the battlefield again. 

“So… what are we doing again?” You say after a few hours of endless walking, you turn to look at Xiao, tilting your head in curiosity. Xiao keeps his head forward but sighs and shakes his head. 

“You mean to tell me you accepted without knowing what was going to happen?”

“Yes?” You answered instantly, like it was an obvious answer. “You are fighting hard to protect Liyue, the least I could do was assist you in this.” He was used to being surrounded by temporary allies and demons. The gratitude and pure reasoning stunned him into a deeper silence, he was an adeptus, it was his duty. He should not receive any thanks for merely doing his duty. He grunted in response and that marked the end of their small talk. It became quiet again, the only noise you could hear were your footsteps, not even a bird flew by in this barren wasteland. 

The two of you settled down in your camp for the night, deciding it was too dangerous to traverse the mountain in the dark. Xiao would've had no problem if not for the injury and you were unused to this kind of terrain. You were sitting by the campfire, making some soup for the two of you as Xiao took a perimeter to check if there was any danger. It was agreed that he could stay up to watch but not physically patrol, you insisted that he needed to sleep but he was quite stubborn. He kept repeating the point that adeptus did not sleep as often as humans but you kept reminding him of his injury. It was a heated argument, not in the way of raised voices but harsh tones and passive aggressive marks. He picked up that there was a switch in you that turned you from your odd clumsy side to a serious healer. And that healer was not to argue against, every point raised by him was instantly shot down by you. Eventually that agreement was made for the sake of the mission at hand, but the air around the two of you became more awkward and filled with unspoken apologies. You sit and stare into the fire, thinking about a way to word your apology without offending Xiao anymore than you have already done. You couldn’t stand the silence anymore and needed one way to fill it, even if it was mainly only your voice. Xiao was kind enough to show that he listens to you with small sounds of acknowledgement but you feared with this fight you may have lost that.

You’re so lost in your thoughts that you don’t hear the said man come back till he sits on the ground with some force, unusual for a man with his kind of grace. Your head snaps up to scan his face, just in time to see the wince he had on his face and how he held his wound. 

“Can I take a look?” You softly ask, looking into his eyes.

“There’s nothing you can do about it right now.” He instantly shot you down, it left a sting in your heart but the healer in you wouldn’t let you back down.

“Please?” You tried your best not to be pushy like before so you didn’t spark another argument. He sees the earnesty in you shine and knows it would sit heavy on his conscience to reject you. He simply nods, lifting the hand to show the blood soaked bandage. You gasp, grabbing your bag to fish out some supplies. You say nothing as you begin to redress his wounds, rubbing in some seeds to coagulate the blood around the wound to stop the bleeding as much as you could. Xiao’s body was tense, no doubt the pain was excruciating. After the wound was redressed, you looked up at Xiao. You didn’t even need to say it, he knew you were mad at him for not telling you or atleast changing it himself. 

“I’m sorry.” The angry look on your face slipped instantly to one of shock, you weren’t expecting Xiao to apologise. You decided that this was a step in the right direction for the two of you and left the lecture for another time. You gave him his food and watched the stars with him. It was a comfortable silence, you felt as though the awkwardness of new companions had finally dissipated. Just that thought alone bought a smile on your face as the night tucked you away into bed. Xiao watched as you fell asleep, shaking his head at how odd humans were. No matter how much he would push, you would keep on coming back, on the outside that made Xiao think about how bothersome. Under the surface his heart felt warm but this was not the time to face such emotions. There was nothing left to explore with those emotions so that’s where he left them. Under the surface. 

Though there are moments where they bubble to the surface. 

➸

First was two days after the campfire incident. There was a shortcut through the ruins instead of hiking another mountain for an extra day. There was an unexpected trap that closed all the exits and the floor began to crumble beneath your very feet. Xiao was close to the edge, he was able to grab onto the pillar and swing himself to the door frame. You, however, were in a more precarious situation. You were standing in the center of the room when it began, you sprinted as fast as you could to gain a running jump onto a steady platform however your foot got caught in the cracked ground. Your heart was pounding in your ears as you fell down into the dark abyss, the edge was inches away from your outstretched arm. You wanted to fight it, but you couldn’t. All you could do was watch as your life slipped away and close your eyes for the impact. When you closed your eyes, you missed the black mist that was coming in closer. All of a sudden you feel an arm wrap around your waist, your arms naturally come up to hold onto the person holding you but even then your eyes dare not open. With a burst of wind everything stops moving. Did you land? But your feet didn’t even touch the ground… your eyes finally snap open to see Xiao’s usual cold face. 

“I-...” You look down and realise that you were clinging onto him like a koala and instantly pushed off of him, almost stumbling back into the pit. Xiao simply sighs, wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you close to his chest again. You let out a squeak and hid your face in his chest, unable to see the slight quirk in Xiao’s lips as he shook his head. Too distracted by your near death, you failed to see Xiao during that rush. When Xiao saw you fall, it was like the world turned into slow motion. His body was paralyzed and unwilling to move. He was tired, but something in him snapped when he saw the terrified look on your face. It didn’t suit you. Before he knew it, his body was moving along with his vision to catch you. He felt ashamed to admit that when he pulled you close and felt you hold onto him caused his heart to soar. He hated this feeling but at the same time thrived off of it, it was confusing. The two of you stay like that for a moment, him holding you close to his body as you calm down from the adrenaline. It didn’t feel too bad, Xiao thinks to himself. 

The second time was when you saw him smile for the first time. You were trying to climb a tree to retrieve the map that kept on flying away from you. 

“Listen Xiao, I got this.” You say seriously, rolling up your sleeves to prepare for the climb. Normally he would just help anyways but after one too many lectures from you he learnt it’s better to let you do your thing. He stood back, watching with his arm crossed. You approached the tree, gulping at the unexpected height, 

“It’s a big tree huh?” You laugh nervously, turning back to Xiao to smile at him nervously.

“Indeed.” He nods, holding his chin in his hand to look up at it. “Be careful, you do have a habit of… falling.” You let out an offended scoff and decided to prove him wrong, you put your full focus in climbing this damn tree. The sun was setting by the time you reached the highest branch, you let out a happy cheer when you pulled yourself up onto the peak. 

“Look Xiao, look!” You shout down to him, raising your hands in a cheer. The victory was short lived when you saw what was in his hand. The map. The map you spent hours climbing a tree for, was in his hand. 

“How long.”

“When you fell out of the tree the first time.” He says, voice trailing off at the end to hold off the laughter. He coughs and brings his hand to cover his mouth, trying to hide his smile but from your height you could see his lips curl upwards. You gasp, about to call him out but a large gust of wind knocked down your stability. Once again you were awaiting the impact but you felt his comforting arms catch you. 

“You have a habit of falling.” Xiao simply states, letting your feet touch the solid ground again. 

“Luckily I have you to catch me if I do.” You smile up at him. It made Xiao dizzy how you could say such cheesy things so freely. He shakes his head and walks away from you, looking down to follow the map. At first you would’ve taken it as a rejection but from your time with him, you knew that your presence affects him. The red ears were a dead give away. 

The final time was when you finally reached the qingxin and finally healed him. When you began to break the qingxin down into a paste, the time left for Xiao was running thin. He could barely make out the words you were saying with your trembling voice and your hands could barely hold the mortar still. He was propped up against the rock, his limbs feeling too heavy to hold himself up but still he found some strength to cup your cheek. Tear stains covered your cheeks as you begged him to hold on, your face was haggard from the travels. You tried to pretend you didn’t notice the colour in Xiao’s cheeks fade as your travels went on but it got so hard pretending. It all reached a peak seeing him collapse face first into the snow, unmoving with his blood turning the white crystals red. You dragged his body up to the peak of the mountain by yourself and got to work. 

Everything started to muffle; the howling winds, the grinding of the mortar and pestle all faded away but the only thing that rang clear in his ears were you.

“Please, please, please- stay awake.” Your voice cracked as sobs broke through your words. You hovered over him, rubbing the paste into his wound whilst repeatedly muttering prayers. With all the strength he had in him he lifted his arm to cup your cheek. Even when he was on the brink of death, all he cared about was comforting you. You looked so beautiful, even when you cried. You held onto his wrist with your hand, leaning your head softly on his hand. Xiao didn’t understand these feelings. It all confused him, humans confused him. Yet he tried. He tried his best to force a smile as his lips parted to speak. ‘I love you.’ was stuck on the tip of his tongue. All he saw as his vision faded to black was your bright young eyes, the first thing he saw when he met you in that tent all those weeks ago. 

Xiao was floating, in the pitch black abyss. He wasn’t falling nor was he flying. It was all just still. He couldn’t hear anything or feel anything in his body, other than his burning side. Was this it? His karmic debt was an eternity of nothing but pain and leaving the one he loved stranded on top of a mountain. He could handle being in pain forever but dragging your suffering into this all was something he couldn’t escape. He gritted his teeth and begged whatever deity was out there to grant him this final wish. ‘I’ll do anything, so please…’ 

The first thing Xiao felt was the familiar weight of his mask in his left hand and the polearm in his right. He was an adeptus, his duty was to protect Liyue and their citizens. Especially you. With that strengthened resolve his mind broke free from the cold embrace of death, he was thrusted back into the noisy world where his love sat over his body alone. He didn’t know how long he was out for but your crying never stopped. 

“Y/N.” Before he could speak, you pounced on him. Holding him tightly, shouting quietly about how he shouldn’t have scared you like that. You pulled back after you snapped out of your excitement, scanning his injury to see if he’s okay. There was nothing there but a dark scar. 

“You’re okay…” You spoke after a moment of silence. Your mind couldn’t begin to comprehend what happened when Xiao rose up. He had a different aura than the man you travelled with, he stood taller and radiated strength. This was Xiao in his prime. One would think after all the prior crying you would have run out of tears but somehow a new wave overcame you. This was the Yaksha you heard stories about, the one you had the honour to heal. He looked out towards the sunset, taking a deep breath of the mountain air before turning to you.

“I have a duty.” He picked up his spear that laid between you two. Your heart started to sink, this was it. You had to return to reality again, the war isn’t done. You should’ve known Xiao would leave you as soon as he could, you were merely a mortal. He made that very clear from day one. Maybe you read the signs wrong and he simply tolerated you. 

“Will I be standing like this for the rest of my life?” His snarky tone broke you out of your stupor and that’s when you noticed his outstretched hand. His eyebrows were raised in amusement as your cheeks bloomed red. Quickly you took his hand and then all of a sudden it felt like you teleported. 

You were in your living quarters back in the camp. Familiar trinkets sat on the shelf and your medical bag sat on the bed. So this was the power of a Yaksha. You looked around for Xiao, wanting to praise him for his incredible feat to see him peeking out of the tent. That’s when you noticed the macabre sounds of war. He turned to you with determined eyes, the fire that burned inside of him spread to you. You simply nodded at him. You both had a duty, as a healer and as a fighter. 

“I’ll find you after this.” When all the dust settles, he will find you and finally say the words that plagued his heart. The last thing he saw was your encouraging smile as he joined his comrades in battle. From what he picked up from hushed whispers in the wind, this was the final battle. The last push to end the war. Then he could begin to build Liyue with Morax and other Adepti for the people. It wasn’t going to be an easy one, both sides knew that this was the battle to tip the scales therefore pulled out all the stops. It ends today, with or without regrets. 

“It is good to see you again Xiao.” Morax says in passing on the battlefield. Xiao noticed the darkness that loomed over the archon. He didn’t have the chance to comment as the new wave of enemies poured in. Xiao darted across the wasteland, exorcising demons that were born through the destruction of war. As the battle went on, they broke through the final line of enemy defence. Fires that spread across the land lit up the sky to the point Xiao couldn’t tell if it was day or night. The cheering of fellow soldiers rang in his ears, this was finally the tipping point. However the excitement was short lived as Xiao saw a burst of elemental energy tear through a whole regiment of men. The crowd of soldiers gave way to reveal the source of that energy. It was the enemy Archon. She laughed wickedly as she mowed over mortals, pulling out all the stops to regain the battle favour. Xiao landed in line with the other surviving Yakshas and adepti, in front of them stood Morax. That darkness that Xiao noticed before never left him, in fact it seemed to grow. 

“What a pitiful sight you are, Morax.” Her voice travelled across the land, her apathetic tone sent shivers down the mortal's spines. She laughs at the Geo archon’s silence, deciding to taunt him more. “If I knew her death would ruin you like this, I would have cut her down from the start.” Xiao’s heart dropped when he realised who she was speaking of. Guizhong. 

“Master do not liste-” Xiao went to stop Morax, if anger took hold it would lead to mistakes. However in that moment of rage and grief, Morax forgot that simple lesson. His cry shook the landscape as his tears watered the blooming flowers of war. If only Morax focused, if only he noticed that as he threw a large stone spear towards the enemy, she summoned a counter. Her attack didn’t completely destroy the weapon but it was enough force to change the course of the rock. Xiao didn’t have a chance to see where it landed as the final clash began. 

➸

“Do you have any regrets Xiao?” You sat down beside him, mixing the pot that boiled about the campfire. He looked at you with furrowed brows and you looked back with an innocent tilt of your head. 

“What kind of question is that?” You sigh as his response, standing up abruptly with your hands on your hips. The movement made him jump slightly, not expecting the sudden movement.

“What do you mean, what kind of question? It’s a simple one,” Xiao didn’t know if he was terrified that a lecture was incoming or the fact that he knew one was coming. “If we’re going to do this perilous journey I want to get to know you.” 

“But out of all the questions-” “I don’t understand what is so hard to answer about it!” You cut him off with a pout. You try to suppress your smile as a defeated sight leaves Xiao. Somehow you always found a way to win against him. 

“May I hear your regret first?” He looks up at you, the edges of his eyes felt softer in the campfire glow. You almost lost yourself in them when you realised what he asked. 

“Mine? That’s easy! I never got my mother’s recipe for tofu.” Xiao looked at you dumbfounded. Out of all the mortal regrets he had to deal with, you chose food. “Don’t look at me like that!” You stutter, hitting Xiao’s shoulder lightly with the spoon. Your mother used to cook you almond tofu whenever you felt sad about your father leaving for war. Whenever she set down the plate, she always kissed your forehead and tucked in with you. It was a warm memory that you will cherish forever but the bitter reminder that you would never eat almond tofu like that again. 

“You should make it sometime.” Xiao encouraged you.

“Were you not listening, I do not have the recipe.” 

“Almond tofu is made the same wherever you go. The only thing that is missing is your mother’s love.” For the third time on that journey, he made you speechless. The tips of Xiao’s ear turned red as you stared at him with a gaped open mouth. “You’ll burn holes into me. Ah- alright!” You threateningly raised up the cooking spoon at the adeptus to which he surrendered. You made him almond tofu a few days after you found out that he never had one since the war started. 

“So, what is your answer then?” You both settled down with your bowls of food, you speak with your mouth full to which Xiao tuts loudly at. You sheepishly apologise as he answers you. 

“I am a Yaksha, I carry many regrets. It is hard to name just a singular one, each one weighs equally heavily in my heart.” Your heart couldn’t handle how cold his words sounded, you mindlessly reached out to hold his hand. He jumped slightly at the unexpected touch but held your hand tighter when you tried pulling away. There always was that wordless communication between the two of you and tonight was no exception. You spent the rest of the night in each other's quiet company. 

➸

The dust settled and the Archon war was over. Mortals rejoice loudly as the endless bloodshed finally gave way to peace. Yet Morax couldn’t bring himself to cheer. There was work to be done. Morax looks around to gather up the Yakshas and forge the contract that would protect Liyue for the years to come. He notices the demon conquer standing beside one of the future mountains of the Liyue landscape. He holds a piece of cloth in his hand, it looks like a sign as Morax approaches. He stopped a few steps away from Xiao, it was silent between the two of them.

“This was the spear that she deflected.” Xiao states, Morax looks over the rock, confirming it to be true. This was by far the largest of the spears, it’s size fueled by the rage he felt in the moment. “I did not notice it landed here…” Morax saw the young man’s shoulder shake as his fist clenched. That was when Morax finally was able to read the sign in Xiao’s hand. Medical Camp. 

➸

“Do you have any regrets?” Aether choked on his mouthful of food, Paimon rushing to hand him a cup of water whilst patting his back. 

“Oi, you can’t just ask anyone that!” Paimon scolds Y/N. The travelling trio stopped by Wangshu Inn on the way back from an errand for the lantern rite. Verr Goldet insisted that the three of them sat down with Xiao to get him in the festive mood. Paimon and Y/N were more than happy to stop for food. Aether sighed, wanting to get back already but the thought of smiley yanxiao’s cooking even appealed to his peculiar taste buds. Y/N grew bored of the suffocating silence, they hated the silence sometimes. That’s why they and Paimon got along so well, always filling the air with their voices.

“Why not! It’s a simple question.” You argue back and forth with them, swinging around your spoon as you defend yourself. Xiao watched with wide eyes, he couldn’t believe it. After almost a thousand years, there you were. It was unmistakably you. 

“Like someone as cold as Xiao would answer!” Paimon, quite loudly, whispered. Even if they whispered Xiao would still be able to hear it. 

“Your companion is correct. I have no answer for you.” Xiao states, he thinks that would finish the argument but it sparks another one as Paimon rubs it in your face. Aether laughs, not helping either of them to settle it, choosing instead to enjoy the show. In the mess of the fight, the three of you fail to notice Xiao leaving the table. 

He stands on the balcony, his plate of untouched almond tofu is on the table. He looks out towards the marshes, losing himself in his thoughts when you sneak up on him. 

“Xiao?” His body breaks out in goosebumps, he misses hearing his new name come from your lips. “I wanted to apologise to you, my question was quite insensitive…” The silence after was deafening, you waited for him to respond. You were speechless at the raw grief in Xiao’s eyes as he forced a grim smile. 

‘My only regret is not telling you I loved you sooner.’

[nootgi]

Love? - Kaeya

A/N:// I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS FIC WHILST I WORK ON MY OTHER REQS, I MAY HAVE CRIED A LIL WRITING THIS! I apologise for this story too T^T

Word count: 3k

“What’s love?” Kaeya paused at the question, his paperwork left forgotten on the table.

“Isn’t that a big question~!” He teases Annette, ruffling her hair. She puffs out her reddened cheeks and tries to move away from his hand, pressing Kaeya for an answer.

“Have you ever heard the phrase curiosity killed the cat? Though I suppose a baby like you wouldn’t know at such a young age.” He laughs, picking up the glass of grape juice to sip from. No alcohol around the children is what you strictly ordered when Kaeya decided to take Annette to work. For something like take your daughter to work day.

“I’m 6! I’m not a baby and mother says it’s good to be curious.” He couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face at her words. That sounds very like you. The apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree he muses as he looks into Annie’s eyes, they hold the same wild innocence yours do. She has her mother’s eyes.

“Very well then, let me tell you a story.”

It was early April and the Windblume festival was coming to a close. The celebrations, despite coming to an ending, still kept the streets lively. Most of the people of Mondstadt were recovering from a hangover from last night’s heavy drinking but still had smiles on their faces. Kaeya was going for a stroll, to distract himself from the thoughts building in the back of his mind. He looked down at the plaza from where he stood, watching the clean up. It always felt bittersweet, taking down the flower garlands that hung from the buildings or rolling up the green carpets that lined the steps. He didn’t know how but he came to love Mondstadt so much... Well actually he did know. They accepted him for who he is, with all of his flaws and lies, Mondstadt and its people held a part of him he didn’t know he had. His family. And in that moment as windwheel aester petals blew from above, Mondstadt gave him something he’ll always be thankful for. 

“Here’s a flower for our cavalry captain!” You cheered, holding a cecilia flower in front of Kaeya’s face, snapping him out of his thoughts. You snuck up on him, attacking him at his weakest moment with a smile. Even though Windblume was coming to a close, you kept the festive cheer. You were handing out a variety of flowers to everyone in Mondstadt to spread the joy and love to everyone. 

“Such beauty handing me a flower, what did I do to deserve this.” He smirks at your momentary panic, ducking down slightly to be face to face. He takes the flower and smells it, hiding his smile in it’s petals. You scold him for saying such cheesy things to someone he just met. It was funny how even though it was your first meeting, your personalities fit perfectly as one. 

“Don’t you ever feel embarrassed by saying those things?” You adjust the flower that was tucked behind your ear.

“The only embarrassment I feel is that I have nothing in return for this lovely gift.” His hand comes up to fix the flower, tucking it perfectly behind your ear. The white petals glowing against your skin. That one encounter set the tradition of Kaeya and you giving presents back and forth every year during Windblume. Even as the years went on, the present stayed as a simple cecilia flower as an ode to that first meeting. 

“He didn’t believe in love at first sight. You could say it was only something that existed in fairy tales for plot convenience. It takes a lot more than first sight to fall in love but he swore that moment could’ve been it.” He looks back at the child who now climbed into his lap, she placed the red blanket over the two of them to make sure they were both comfortable. Her eyes were fixed on Kaeya, watching with eager eyes to hear more. He holds her close so she doesn’t fall off his lap as he continues his story. 

“Love can be the best feeling in the whole world but it can also be the worst.”

Kaeya stood in front of the crowd of kids with an odd look on his face. It wasn’t one you were used to seeing on his face, it was the look of utter confusion. You walked over to find out what was going on but decided to listen to the conversation first. 

“Sister Barbara said you’d be entertaining us! But this is boring!!” One of the kids said, the others around him nodding and some going far as to cheer. Kaeya didn’t know what to do. He was bad with kids, he couldn’t be mean otherwise Jean would have to deal with the complaints and he most definitely couldn’t use his usual lines. As he tried to think of something to do the kids started to chant ‘let’s play!’ and that’s when you finally decided to enter. 

“Hey there Captain! Need some help?” It was like an angel coming down from the heavens, he swore there was even a halo around your head. The kids, already knowing you, cheered at your entrance. Kaeya watched as you calmed the kids down, getting them to eat lunch and successfully buying time for the two of you to plan something to entertain them. 

“How’d you manage to get into this then Kaeya?” You approach him after giving the last child some apple juice. 

“Jean would normally do this but since it’s been a while since she spent time with her sister I decided to volunteer.” That stunned you for a moment, you heard stories from Amber about how Kaeya always seemed to avoid work and formed an unfair opinion of him in your head. You felt guilty because of those thoughts, you saw how he struggled with those kids but still put himself out there for the sake of Jean and Barbara. “But let’s not tell Jean that.” 

“Would it be so bad for Jean to know the truth?” You ask plainly, ignoring the way Kaeya said the last part of his sentence. 

“Well-” You didn’t even let him finish

“I think the problem you have Kaeya is that you’re too closed off, children are so open and trusting that the only way to get along with them is to do the same.” 

“That can’t be done overnight let alone in an hour (Y/N).” It was the first time Kaeya said your name and it sent shivers down your spine. The very thought of opening up felt dangerous to Kaeya, the last time he opened up the last of his family left him in the dust.

“You’re right in that area but we can take baby steps!” You weren’t deterred by the tall walls he built around himself. You used the word ‘we’. We can take baby steps. That’s all that lingered in Kaeya’s mind, it was like an informal promise from you to him that you’ll be beside him for that journey. 

“Then where do we start, captain cheerful?” You roll your eyes at the nickname but gesture towards the children. 

“We start with them.” That day was one of the best days Kaeya had since his childhood. He never thought hide and seek could be so thrilling or that duck duck goose could be so intense! The kids were more than happy to embrace Kaeya and his awkward aura, teaching him of super secret tactics that no-one would ever know. He found himself learning more about the children and about himself. At times when he feels his guard going back up, he glances over at you and sees you playing with some of the quieter children, bringing them out of their shells. Your smile blended in with the childish joy of the kids around the two of you. Sometimes your eyes caught each other's and you both just shyly laughed it off as kids pulled the two of you away in different directions. It was hard to catch a moment to talk to each other until you took the kids to watch the sunset by Cider lake. Most of the kids were settled on the grass, sitting crossed leg and talking about all the fun they had that day. One of the boys shyly tugged Kaeya’s leg, asking to be carried since his mother always did it for him. He looked towards you for help but you just gave two thumbs up, encouraging him. He carefully picked up the boy, letting him rest on his hip and one arm securing his waist. The boy rested his head on Kaeya's shoulder, using the fur on his shoulder as a pillow to slowly doze off. Kaeya stood still. He didn’t expect the day to go like this let alone carry a sleeping child too. You patted Kaeya’s shoulder to reassure him and the rest of the sunset was spent with whispered words exchanged between the two of you. After such a successful day, the two of you decided to take the kids once every week off of Jean’s hands. 

“Love didn’t make him become a better person magically but instead motivated him to strive for that. She inspired him to try and be a better version of himself. It wasn’t like she was perfect either, they both worked on themselves whilst inspiring each other. That’s the good side of love Annie, but there is a bad side too…” Annette saw Kaeya’s eyes darken a little and she moved her small hands to rest on top of his larger ones to comfort him. 

All Kaeya saw was red. It started off as a light hearted exchange between some treasure hunters that the two of you came across during an adventure. They used the typical story of their cart breaking down and needing help so they could lure adventurers into a trap before robbing them blind. Kaeya already knowing this tried to shut them down before anyone else could fall victim to them. He was going to only use his words since he didn’t want you getting hurt in the crossfire. He knew you could defend yourself but it was too risky with the amount of numbers they had on them, no doubt there were more of them hidden. However his words only seemed to provoke the treasure hunters more, they struck to attack him but the crossbow went astray and hit you in the shoulder instead. It could’ve been a simple flesh wound or a small cut but even the tiniest amount of blood from you sent him off. The area started dropping in temperature, the floor stable floor below the men started to turn into ice and there was a still moment as a singular snowflake drifted down onto the floor. Once it hit the ground, there was a flash and  its delicate crystals were stained with blood. Kaeya stood over the last one with his sword raised to crash down on him till you came from nowhere to hold back his arm.

“Kaeya! Stop this!!” You begged him, looking at his side profile and trying to avoid looking at the bodies that surrounded the two of you. He couldn’t hear you, all he could hear was your scream when you got hit and had tunnel vision. 

“Please stop, you’re scaring me.” You sobbed softly, finally catching his eye. The darkness that clouded his eyes faltered as he put down his sword and embraced you. The man that was on the floor scrambled up to his feet, apologising profusely before running off with a terrified shriek. Kaeya could care less about what he did, he could only think about you now. He felt your shoulders shake from the fear or maybe from the sobs that escaped your body. His heart felt as though it dropped to his stomach, he hurt you. He scared you. When his hand came up to pat your head, you flinched away. It still sticks with him to this day, your tear stained face and eyes filled with fear because of what he was. He hated himself after that day, he felt as though he was back to square one. 

“It can lead you to dangerous things. You could disregard everything and everyone around you and ironically hurt the one you were trying to protect. But you can control all these negatives by simply talking about it with whoever you love. Never run away from it.” 

“Did the lady leave him after that?” Annette asked with tears in her eyes, not wanting to see such a tragic ending for the love story. 

“No she didn’t. When he ran away, she chased after him. She was really stubborn and cornered the poor man!” 

After the incident, Kaeya was put on a suspension from his job. The people of Mondstadt didn’t know any better, thinking it was him taking a small break from his work. Kaeya doesn’t know why Jean kept it a secret but decided to roll with it. He took his suspension as a time to withdraw from you, it was scary how quickly he became so attached to you. It was dangerous for the two of you so he decided himself to end whatever went on between the two of you. When you woke up the next day, you found out about Kaeya’s suspension and tried looking for him to talk things out. It was an impossible task since Kaeya seemed to become air whenever he saw you approaching or when you ask people about his location they all gave different answers. It annoys you to no end. He saves your life and then decides to remove himself from your life. Like hell you’d allow that. So you hatch a plan with Rosaria. 

It was a Thursday night and normally Kaeya would be holed up at work but with his suspension he decided to go to the angel’s share. Rosaria said she would be there in the back corner on the second floor, she told him that she would drink with him since it was boring to drink alone. He arrives earlier than Rosaria and decides to start drinking before she gets there, ordering a bottle of dandelion wine and slowly sipping on it. Minutes turn into hours and before he realises it’s closing time and he isn’t nearly as drunk as he would like to be. Rosaria was a no show and the tavern was completely empty. That’s when Kaeya realised he was caught in a trap, he had nowhere to run as you slowly approached him. You had a really angry look on your face. It was one look, he hates to admit, that scared him. You say nothing as you seat yourself across from Kaeya.

“F-fancy seeing you here (Y/N).” He offers with a meek smile.

“It really is an odd coincidence huh? It feels like it’s been a while since we talked.” You smile, but it isn’t reaching your eyes. That night you both talked about your feelings and cried with each other. Kaeya tells you things he never imagined telling you, about his self-hatred and how he feels as though he doesn’t belong. How the guilt eats him up everyday. You in return comfort him through it all, you might not have much to say back to him but that’s okay because just having someone listen to him was more than enough. Especially if it was you.

He was walking away from your doorstep after dropping you off home when he was stopped by you.

“No matter what happens Kaeya, don’t make my decisions for me! I’m a grownup and I told you all those years ago, WE will take these baby steps together.” You say seriously, holding his gaze with your fiery eyes. As he looked up at you, he felt his heartbeat pick up and a terrible realisation came down on him. Oh.

“I promise.” He was in love. 

“When you love someone Annette, it isn’t all black and white. You have to work to keep your relationship going, when something bad happens you talk about it, celebrate the small wins alongside the big ones. At moments you can feel lost in love, know you aren’t alone in this world. And once you find that special person, never let them go.” He pats the girl’s head as she brings her hand up to rub at her sleepy eyes. 

“Would there ever be a moment you would let go of love?” She asked innocently. As Kaeya opened his mouth to respond, the sound of the door opening interrupted the two of them.

The two look towards who came in and suddenly all the sleepiness in Annette’s body seems to leave her.

“Mommy!” She shouted excitedly, jumping into your open arms. You lift her up and spin her around as she giggles happily. Kaeya watched the exchange with fond eyes, standing up to walk towards them.

“So what did you do today?” You ask, it seems like an innocent question but Kaeya knows it's you checking to see if the two of you got up to any devious acts. 

“I learnt about love!” Annette says proudly, she holds her hands against her hips and proudly puffs her chest out. Kaeya laughs softly, as you turn to him with a curious gaze. 

“Oh really? Who taught you?” Diluc walks in behind you, laughing softly at Annette. Annette notices his arrival, reaching out for him to take her off of you. She laughs when Diluc tickles her sides as he adjusts his grip on her.

“Uncle Kaeya!” Her red hair bounces as she turns to point to Kaeya who was standing a few steps away from the family. 

She had her mother’s eyes and her father’s hair.

‘There can be a moment Annie. Sometimes there can be a moment when you realise another person can make them happier than you ever could but I hope from the bottom of my heart that, you, my dearest niece will never experience that.’

[nootgi]

Coming Home - Kaeya

Word count: 870

A/N:// This is a short fic on how cuddling with Kaeya would go since I’m insanely soft for him right now. Wanna give him the fattest hug! Enjoy everyone \(^O^)/

The night was almost coming to an end as Kaeya arrived home from the Headquarters. Today had been busy with the abyss and Fatui, also not to mention the animosity between him and Diluc. Whilst he had become used to all the fast pace action, there are times when even the youngest cavalry captain can feel burnout. Now was one of those times. 

All he wanted to do was lay down beside you and sleep away the fatigue and stress but he knew you had an important expedition coming up and didn’t want to ruin your sleeping pattern… again. You definitely gave him an earful when you came back before crashing asleep on the bed, he was sent to the couch for 3 days till you welcomed him back into the bedroom. As much as he wanted to climb into bed beside you, he knew he’d disturb your sleep so Kaeya decided to lay on the couch. He’d have to get up soon anyway. His shoes were discarded by the door, along with his coat and the fireplace was beginning to do its job on heating the room. The slow song of the awakening birds was all you could hear, lulling Kaeya into a light sleeping state. When sleep was about to claim him and tuck him away, Kaeya felt something climb on top of him. Even with his eyes shut, he knew who it was. 

He slightly opened his eye, the drowsiness preventing him from opening them fully. Laying on top of him was his little spitfire. 

“Hey there beautiful, why the long face?” He notices the pout on your puffy face, he could tell you were barely awake yourself. You were wrapped up like a burrito with only your face peeking out. There was some slight drool on the corner of your mouth which he reached up to wipe. You jump slightly away from his cold fingertips but then settle your cheek in his palm.

“Why are you out here?” You relax your body onto his more, laying your head on his chest instead of his palm. Your cheek squished against his pecs. His hand moves to hold you close, arm banding around your waist to secure you. He tilts his head up to kiss your forehead whilst his other hand brushes back your hair. His lingering warmth makes you purr slightly, you missed his touch all day and like hell were you gonna miss your daily kaeya to something like sleep. 

“It’s late, I didn’t want to wake you my love.” He says softly, fearing if he raises his voice louder he’ll shatter the peace that shrouded you both. 

“You’re bashful on waking me up for cuddles but when it comes to something else you can’t wait, huh?” After some silence you spoke up, catching him fully off guard. He laughs sheepishly and pats your head. He turns his head away from your intense gaze, trying to hide the slight flush on his cheeks. With how close you are, you could definitely feel his body heat up. You laugh softly and wriggle one arm out of your blanket to cup his cheek. Your words and soft pats against his cheeks only seemed to add onto the embarrassment. 

“Alright, You’ve had your fun now my love. I apologise,” He swats your hand away with his cheeks puffed “I apologise for not coming and… for this!” He yells suddenly, his cold hands finally found a breach in your blanket burrito. They find a way to hold onto your bare waist despite your thrashing around. You shriek at the sudden cold but it devolves into uncontrollable laughter as Kaeya tickles you. Even with the overwhelming want to sleep, Kaeya couldn’t help but keep his eyes open to watch the bright smile to light up your face. Who needed a sunrise when they had someone like you in their life. Your hands came up to hold Kaeya’s shoulder, trying to lift yourself up and away from him but his hands let up their attack and instead let his arms wrap around you again. In one swift movement you both are turned, your back is against the couch and trapped between Kaeya’s arms. Your head was using his bicep as a pillow and his free arm was wrapped around your waist. Your legs wrapped around his waist and the blanket now covered the two of you. Your faces were practically nose to nose, the only thing audible in your little bubble was your panting and both heartbeats. 

The adrenaline from being tickled slowly faded away and the original sleepiness took hold of you again. You smile at Kaeya, seeing him fight to keep his eyes open is adorable. Your hand comes up to play with his hair, you scratch his scalp to lull him to sleep. He groans appreciatively and pulls you closer. Just as you thought he was asleep, his chest rumbled as he tried getting his words out. 

“Goodnight my love.” A feather-touch kiss was pressed against your lips and then the sounds of Kaeya’s even breathing filled your ears. You smiled and moved to rest your head against his chest, letting his head rest on top of yours.

The two of you held each other, hidden away in your little paradise, even if it was for a fleeting moment.

[nootgi]

hi nootie <3 can i get “your hair is sticking out everywhere. cute.” with albedo :3

“Your hair is sticking out. Cute.” - Albedo

A/N:// AAAA I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS ALBEDO ONE, I TRIED KEEPING IT CUTE BUT THE STUFF YOU SAY IN THE DISC ABOUT HIM IT’S HARD...

Albedo was returning from his month-long expedition in Dragonspine tomorrow. That was the only thought running around in your head as you got ready for bed. You weren't sure if the excitement would let you get the sleep your body so desperately needed. When Albedo left for a long period of time you tended to let yourself go wild, you threw yourself into work and ran around doing errands. Kaeya, under Albedo’s instruction and his own concern for a friend, watches over you as much as he could do. However you can get quite stubborn for even the cavalry captain to control, he does make sure you’re eating well at least. You had no thought about the repressed exhaustion as you drifted off.

The next day you woke up to hearing the church bells go off signifying the new hour. You roll over onto your back, stretching from that refreshing sleep. You have no thoughts as you stare up at the ceiling, trying to remember the plan for the upcoming day. Meet Albedo at- You sit up quickly, holding your head from the sudden blood rush, but your eyes are focused on the clock that reads 1PM!? You rush to put your shirt and pants on whilst trying to think of an excuse to give Albedo even though you know he’ll understand. You couldn’t believe you slept through your reunion with Albedo, after he was gone for a month! You missed him so much, sleeping in his shirts and being surrounded by his familiar scent could only do so much for you. As you go to leave the house there is a letter sitting on the table by the door. The handwriting on the envelope was the familiar cursive writing of a certain alchemist, to which you ran over to open. 

‘To my dearest, It seems my absence has had your spirits low and sent my dove into a deep hibernation. Not even the loudest of tremblems in Mond could seem to wake you. I take responsibility for that. There is probably a deep regret simmering in your mind but please put them at ease, seeing you sleep so peacefully brings me great comfort. That very image could keep me warm from the biting cold of dragonspine itself. But I digress, I anticipate you waking up around midday therefore I shall wait for you by our spot by Cider lake. I can’t wait to see my dove return from the depths of her slumber.  Yours Faithfully, Albedo.’

Your cheeks seemed to flare up, setting Diluc’s red hair to shame. He saw you in your dead deep sleep and even teased you for it. You could picture his slightly smug smile as he wrote this! You pouted a little but seeing the little heart signed by the end of his name left your lips in a wide grin. After the letter was safely tucked away in your backpack, you practically skipped to the small cliff behind mondstad, where Albedo awaited. People in the town greeted you with smiles, already sensing the change in your aura. You practically glowed when Albedo was around. Some people tried to stop you to talk to them but you waved them off, not wanting to delay getting to him. After you left the city walls, you instantly saw the familiar silhouette. 

All Albedo heard was a high pitched scream of his name before he was tackled to the ground. His notepad and pen landed a few feet away from him and the water bottle that he was midway drinking from landed right on his head. He could only laugh as he tried to turn around from the weight pinning him down. When he turned onto his back, your radiant smile peeked up from his chest. Albedo could swear that his heart stopped along with the world around him. You help him up and pat him dry with your sleeve, apologising for the unexpected attack. He holds your hands in his and lifts them up to his lips to press soft kisses on the backs of both of them. His tender smile mirrors your and he brings you to sit down on the blanket he prepared. As soon as you sat down you started to retell him all of the fun stories from when you got Klee to catch a spider in your bathroom to the hilichurl camp you and Lisa took down. Through the stories, Albedo feeds you some cake knowing that you hadn’t eaten breakfast. After a while you noticed he went silent, he was staring. You stare back with a confused tilt of your head and Albedo struggled to keep composure. 

“What?”

“What what?” he says the second what in his ‘perfect’ impersonation of you

“Why are you staring?” You punch his shoulder playfully, laughing as he holds his shoulder pretending to be in intense pain. You play along with his pain and pull him close, apologising over and over again. Once the two settled down again, he continued staring at you. You look back into his teal eyes, before glancing down at his soft looking lips. When your eyes meet again the two of you are leaning toward each other, his hand comes up to cup your cheeks and your eyes close in anticipation. Looking forward to the kiss to come. 

But it never comes. 

“Your hair is sticking out everywhere. Cute.” He whispers into your ears instead, your eyes snap open and push him away. You scramble to get a pocket mirror out to see the bird's nest that sticks out of your hair. Then it all clicks in your head. The people in the market trying to stop you, the fact that you didn’t check yourself before leaving and also why he was intensely sketching during your ramble about fowl hunting. He smiles smugly when you slowly turn to him.

“That’s for the wet hair, my dove.”

[nootgi]

Crystal Kisses - Childe

A/N:// I wrote this for a friend last year and decided to spread it out, take gn!reader and Childe on their secret mission!

Word count: 1200

“How does that even stay on your head?” They asked, completely distracted from the task at hand. The duo stood on the edge of a cliff, hidden by a VERY out of the place bush, looking down at the target. 

“Magic. Now focus.” He kept his answer short, needing full concentration to line up the shot. It was crucial that he didn’t miss. The whole plan hinged on it. If he messed up now, neither of them would see the light of day again. Their target stood in the centre of a ruin, lost in thought as his assailant drew back the drawstring.

Just as Childe’s fingers released the bowstring, his partner decided to shout ‘BULLSHIT’ on the top of their lungs, causing their target to notice them. However it was far too late for him, his hat was pierced by a hydro arrow and the stream of water doused the 6th harbinger. Scaramouche’s murderous roar echoed in the gorge as the duo turned to each other. Without a word they took off sprinting down the cliff, away from the 5ft storm that was coming straight for them.

“You just had to shout.” Childe says with a low voice. All he hears in answer was a sheepish giggle and somehow the anger starts to soften around the edges. 

“Oops-? Hey wait!!!” They were lagging behind Childe and his stupidly long legs and the dark electric aura behind was gaining on them. Panicking, they reach out for his hand. He doesn’t hesitate to wrap his hand firmly around their’s and drag them along. By that point, Childe won’t lie but he forgot to be angry. The two ran across the open field with the biggest shit eating grin, holding hands. 

They came to a cave opening to an old mine shaft and decided to hide inside. There wasn’t much light inside the cave, the only source being the dim candles and the glowing crystals. Childe flopped down onto a rock, panting slightly to catch his breath but it proved to be difficult due the laughter constantly bubbling out of him. The other groaned in embarrassment, sliding down the wall to hide their face in their knees. Eventually the cave became silent as the laughter trailed off.

“Tartaglia! I’m so sorry-“ They rushed to say, unmoving from their shame cocoon. 

“Bullshit.” Childe says after a beat of silence and loses himself again in a fit of laughter. The shame proving too much for them, his partner stood up instantly and tried walking out of the cave with a pout. Before they could reach the exit, Childe had them trapped between the wall and his chest. His arms caged them against the wall, on either side of their head. They tried to move but Childe’s dark eyes had them fully paralysed. There was no escape other than maybe crawling between his legs? ‘No! That won’t work, he’ll just close his legs and crush me-‘ Noticing they were lost in thought, Childe moved one of his gloved hands to tilt their chin up. Only when his forehead came to rest on theirs did they snap out of it. 

“H-Hi.” They lamely squeaked out, the slight squirming below him bought satisfaction that no battle could. (Sadistic motherfu-) 

“Going somewhere Darling~?” His voice was barely above a whisper, whilst his voice sounded menacing his eyes told a different story. Childe’s eyes seemed to glow brighter than the crystals in the dim cave. Amusement swam wild in his blue eyes along with a hidden tendrils of tenderness. His eyes promised so much yet said so little, they could never understand the enigma that is Childe. However one thing was for sure, with him they never had anything to fear. Just as they were about to respond they couldn’t help but let their focus shift to his mask again. 

“Seriously how does that stay up there?” They unconsciously reached out to touch it, with a sigh he pressed his face closer to theirs. Even the smallest breath Childe let out was felt against their lips. The hand dropped midair, falling onto his shoulder and gripped onto his jacket tightly. 

“Even with me right in front of you like this, all you think of is my mask…” His other arm left the wall to slide around their waist. Their bodies pressed against each other like a moth to a flame, “What will it take for you to look at me darling?” By then his words are barely heard as their lips finally meet. His lips first touched their upper lip and his thumb moved from stroking circles on their cheeks to slowly pulling down their bottom lip. He moved his lips slowly, sliding over their mouth fully, letting his tongue enter their mouth. The kiss was slow but the passion behind it made their eyes shut and knees feel weak. They fell more into Childe’s embrace which he welcomed happily. Their hands moved up slowly up his chest, one resting on the base of his neck and the other tangled into his orange hair. Before they could get lost in each other’s embrace, they pulled away to catch their breath. They looked shyly away from him, cheeks flushed and softly breathless. They pressed their fingers against their own lips and suddenly alarm bells were ringing in their mind. They were too distracted to notice Childe’s intense stare, he watched intently as if to burn this image to memory. A sight he never wanted to forget. 

“Is that all you can take Dar-“ He was cut off as they jumped up to kiss him, the surprise sent Childe a step back but he caught himself. He found he couldn’t close his eyes with them this close, he watched their eyes that were screwed shut, the telling red blossoming on the tip of their ears and couldn’t help but smile into the kiss. They were too tense and doing it all wrong. He let them take the lead but let his hand on their cheek left to the back of their neck to tickle them slightly. It made them relax into the kiss and softly giggle into the kiss. With a shy grin they pushed him away again to cover their neck.

“Stop, you know I’m ticklish!” He smiled and waved his hands in the air to surrender.

“I’m sorry, I can’t help where my hands wander!” 

“Bullshit.” His lazy grin showed not even a drop of sincerity as he found his way back to holding them in his arms, the mood in the cave took a fun twist. In contrast to the deep passionate kisses from before they moved into small pecks as they joke around with each other. Small teasing remarks from Childe and snarky comebacks from them, shutting the other up with just a simple press of their lips. They moved from standing to being sat on the mine floor with them on his lap. Just as they try to get back into the mood, they run their fingers through his hair and the thump of Childe’s mask falling to the floor broke the mood. Childe started to laugh in the kiss, his laughter contagious as they started laughing with him. They both looked disheveled with messy hair and bright red lips. 

“Who would’ve thought magic would be such a cock blo-” A resonating slap sounded around the cave. 

(By this point if you’re wondering what is taking Scaramouche so long to catch up, well… he doesn’t have enough stamina left to climb the mountain and eventually relented as he realised his hat is still stuck on the pillar.)

[nootgi]

Hello it's me haha ehm, do you do imagines? I wanna request for Albedo; if it's ok, just a small fic of Klee catching her big brother kissing his S/O and Albebe is stumbling in his words trying to reason with Klee 😂 if it's ok-- *scurries awayy*

A little help please? - Albedo

A/N:// SORRY FOR THE WAIT, it was taking longer than expected to do other requests but, here ya go ^-^ one embarrassed and mortified Albedo comin your way

You couldn’t breathe. 

It was impossible, every intake seemed to be cut off with a harsh exhale. Your lungs began to burn, sides started to ache and tears rolled down your face. Albedo watched in dismay as you keeled over, laughing your ass off at him. He couldn’t believe you still had it in you to laugh for 20 MINUTES after what happened. Every moment you feel as though you calmed down you look at his flushed cheeks and it sends you back down into a flurry of giggles.

What happened 20 minutes earlier? Well it begins with Albedo sneaking into the library during his lunch break to visit you. He catches you off guard as he presses you between the bookshelf and his sturdy chest. He had you pinned between his two arms. The book you were holding falls out of your hand, landing on the floor with a thud but you two don’t pay any attention to it. Both of you are looking into each other’s eyes, one hand came down to intertwine his fingers in yours.

“What brings Mr Alchemist here?” You whisper, bringing up his hand to kiss it softly. 

“I missed seeing my precious dove.” The press of your lips against his hand bought that colour you loved seeing on his cheeks but that didn’t stop Albedo and that smoulder of his. It did turn your gears how easily he slipped into his flirt mode, how his body seemed more imposing with his relaxed posture. The small quirk of his lip brings it up into a barely visible smirk, only noticeable with how close he drew his face to yours. 

“Ah did you now? It didn’t seem like you did the way you left today.” You smile, playing along with his mood, leaning up to bump your foreheads together. Today morning when you awoke, Albedo was already leaving out of the door mumbling something to himself. He took his portion of breakfast along with your morning kiss.

“Forgive me dove.” His eyes slightly darkened at your words, as if taking offence to your doubt, you were his world and stars and he wouldn’t let you doubt that even as a joke. You raise your eyebrows at his change in mood, about to question what he is doing when the hand that was holding yours so delicately, came up to hold the back of your hair in a firm grip. The kiss started out soft, his lips parted to draw your tongue in and dance along with his. Gradually the passion increased, causing you to lose yourself in the kiss. You felt your balance leaving you so you wrapped your arms around his neck, his arm that rested on the bookshelf moved to band around your waist. You let out a whine when Albedo pulled back to move his head down your neck and move his wet lips to drag lightly over your collarbone.

“You see dove I had something,” between each word was a swipe of his tongue against your most sensitive spot, every puff of his hot breath sent tingles down your spine and goosebumps to flourish everywhere, “To attend to for-”

“ALBEDO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO (Y/N)!?”

“KLEE!?” 

Klee had escaped from solitary confinement with the secret help of Kaeya! She had a secret mission of infiltrating the library to recover her story book that Lisa confiscated from her. It was very important that she got it back, it had all her survival tips and treasure maps! She made sure that Miss Lisa was gone to lunch with Miss Jean before sneaking into the library, the knights that stood guard turned a blind eye to the small girl since they knew she had no explosives. Upon entering she heard a small thud, her active imagination put her on high alert so she ran over to see what was wrong. As she was about to rush over, she remembered that Kaeya said stealth was key in these types of situations. It took Klee a while and a few bumps to quietly sneak down the stairs and cross the squeaky floorboards in the library. When she turned the corner she wasn’t expecting to see big brother Albedo and (Y/N). The two of you instantly separated, you turning away from Klee to recompose yourself. Redoing the buttons that got undone in that rush and fixing your hair as Albedo was silent. Klee stared Albedo down with her arms crossed and an unusual angry look, Albedo just stared back. It was like that for a few seconds before you cleared your throat and turned back around, stifling a laugh at the scene in front of you.

“Albedo what were you doing to them!?” She stomped her little legs over to take your hand and drag you away from Albedo. Putting herself between the two of you as to protect you from him and his mouth. Albedo’s eyes, comically wide, glance to yours to plead for help but you just shrug with a face splitting smile. 

“Y-you’re misunderstanding Klee.” The confident Albedo you knew a few minutes ago was gone and in his place was his blubbering embarrassed self. It wasn’t often you saw this side with Albedo so you savoured every second of it. You knew you could help but why waste such a good opportunity. 

“You always told me seeing is believing! I should trust what I saw and not your words!” You swear you were gonna have jaws of steel with how hard you're clenching them right now. 

“Well- uh you see Klee, me and (Y/N) were…” Albedo never thought his science tips would bite him in the ass this hard. “Kissing.” Honesty is the best policy? 

“I saw kisses in my story books! That was not kissing!!” Right, Albedo forgot Klee had some picture story books about love stories and all kinds of fluff. You could see the blood draining from Albedo’s face as his hands flapped about trying to make up an excuse. And honestly…

“When two people love each other…” It became harder to listen to. 

“Big brother Albedo deserves to be in solitary confinement! Klee goes there when she hurts people so Albedo goes there too.” She reaches her final verdict, her hat bouncing as she does a satisfied nod. By this moment, Albedo’s puffy hair is flattened from how many times he nervously ran his fingers through it and you were holding onto a bookshelf for support to hold in your laughter. 

“How will you be getting Albedo in there Klee?” You ask after composing yourself a little with some deep breaths, ignoring Albedo’s betrayed look. 

“Miss Jean will after I tell her!” Albedo has never been more at loss in his life, he was so used to being able to find an answer to everything or at least be on the right path. But with this, where was he to go. Every route was a dead end and his precious dove, his lifeline, left him stranded. Well there was one thing he could do.

“A little help ple-” His voice cracked. As did the dam holding back your laughter.

You sent Klee off, reassuring her that you were okay and could punish Albedo yourself. The two of you stood in by the table, listening to her grab her book and leave the library before turning to each other. Albedo looked worse than he did after a long night in the lab, hair messy, eyes bloodshot and dry from how wide and unblinking they were moments before. He made sure to clear his throat before speaking to you however when he caught your eye, you were back into your fit of giggles. 

All he wanted was to get his missing morning kiss and instead got a lifetime of embarrassment and a suspicious pat on the back from Kaeya.

[nootgi]

Control - MLQC Victor

Victor. In all of Loveland city this man was known as a successful and stoic CEO. His face always had a look of indifference and never showed what was ticking away in his mind. His sharp eyes gleamed dominance and control, just a glare could leave someone shaking in their boots. When the tabloids tried to press and probe into his life, they found nothing but empty rumours and dead ends. He's kept tight reigns on his personal life. No-one could imagine what he does in his personal life. No-one knows what the stone faced CEO does in his free time. No-one except me.

A:N:// this is me posting from my ao3 account onto tumblr! if you wanna read it there my username is the same as my tumblr! Anyways this was from a while back during my pegging spree- 

Word Count: 2130

Warnings: Bottom Victor, Nipple clamps, Bondage and a whole lotta teasing

When I had first met Victor, he walked into the building with people flying around him to bow and appear busy. He oozed confidence from the way his shoulders were pulled back and how his long strides made it seem like he was gliding with each step. His hair shined in the sun, making my fingers itch to run through it. When he stood in front of me, he was looking down at me, literally and figuratively. I was practically eye level with his chest and thought to myself 'Does he really need that tight of a shirt!?' The shirt practically stuck to his chest, showing the perfect slope of his pecs and his small waist. His shadow had literally swallowed me up as he towered over me and there was that infuriatingly cocky smirk on his face when he challenged me. What I would do to wipe that off his face.

Monday, 1:55pm.

Lunch was just coming to an end as tired workers made their way back to the office. The building once again bustled with life as Goldman rushed out of the elevator. He was off schedule a little, he and Victor needed to leave ASAP to even reach the meeting on time. He silently prayed for himself as he reached for the handle of Victor's office door. Suddenly the sound of footsteps, telephones ringing and everyone paused. Silence.

From the silence sounded out a whimper. "Are you ready for your challenge Victor?"

In the center of the open office space was Victor, kneeling. His arms offered him no support as they were tied behind his back with the purple tie he was previously wearing. Moments before the pause he was sitting at his desk till a certain dummy had walked in with her swaying hips and sultry eyes. His neat shirt was undone and his chest was littered with countless lipstick stains and bite marks. Each left with a painstakingly slow pace, fueling the fire burning inside of Victor even more. Her kisses had trailed down his torso, avoiding his nipples, only leaving feather-like touches on them. Every touch from her felt scorching, like her hands were trying to burn themselves into Victor's mind. Feel her even when she's not there. The pants she took off next with swift hands, leaving Victor bare in his office. The cold air from the AC was a sharp contrast to the throbbing heat between Victor's legs, unconsciously he bucked his hips drawing a laugh out of her. Her hands instantly went exploring the newfound expanse, from his feet to his thighs. She massaged her way up, slowly removing the tenseness from the muscles. She always knew the right places to calm his body down. Behind her hands followed her lips, each press made his body melt and just as he was fully relaxed a sharp bite was left of his inner thigh. Startled, he let a moan slip from his lips and fill the silent office. As it echoed around the room, a beautiful red blush bloomed on Victor's chest and cheeks. She always said red looked amazing on him.

Victor glanced at the clock that read 1:45pm and sighed realising that the foreplay has dragged on a little too long. "You've had your fun teasing me but now it's time to--" Victor began to speak, "Who said the fun was over Victor~?" Her voice was low in his ears, the evil in her laugh made the hairs stand up on the back of his neck. "I don't think so." Victor picking up on she meant, instantly rejected. "Why? You don't think you could be a good boy and show me how strong you are?" As she was speaking, her fingers came up to run through his hair. Victor leans into her touch, enjoying her soft touch. The thought of praise caused the breath to catch in his throat. "Prove it to me Victor, show me how amazing you really are." Her voice caused Victor's body to shiver in anticipation as he nodded eagerly. "I accept, though I doubt a dummy like you could do much to make me lose control." Her eyes shone with determination the moment Victor let that comment out.

"You forget who's in control now."

1:54pm, Victor was tied up with red rope in the middle of his office. His thighs were tied to his calves and kept from touching with a metal bar behind his knees. His cock was left exposed to the world and to make matters (fun) worse, he was facing the door in this position. 'Did she lock it?' as if reading his thoughts she smirked and shook her head. 'I don't need it to be locked. I'll win.' On his tip there was a small vibrator taped against it, the setting currently on a low vibration. There was another vibrator sat below his shaft and slightly touching his balls, leaving much to be desired. Just below that sat the jewel head of a plug, that was slowly inserted into Victor. He was a sight to behold. His back was straight and shoulders pushed back. He held his head high, purple orbs glazed over with intense lust and concentration. It would appear nothing was bothering him if not for that tremble on his lips.

Victor picked up on the hurried footsteps of Goldman and the second the minute hand moved, time had paused. His heartbeat started to race, now feeling the stakes of their challenge. If he loses control, he will be shamed and humiliated.

"Let's begin." She was now seated at his desk, her newly done nails tapping against the wood. The challenge is to hold time till she is finished with the work she has to do. If he does it successfully there is promise of having her ruin him. The very thought of having her thrust into him steals his nerves and motivates him.

The first ten minutes is uneventful, the constant vibrations are slowly making his tip leak and the liquid is somehow making the vibrations more intense. His muscles are starting to cramp a little causing his body to shift, as he moved his weight onto one knee, the ropes contracted. The rough dig into his skin made him groan and he just knew marks will be left. He tried to peek a look towards the woman and a whine almost slipped past his lips when he had noticed she never even looked his way once. As if feeling his stare her hand rises, holding a remote. The increase in intensity on his cock gave some clue as to what the remote was for. Her eyes lit up in amusement when a choked moan fell from his lips.

"Keep your eyes forward." The ice in her voice left no room for disobedience. His eyes move back to the door handle instantly. His body started to shake, feeling the toll of freezing time and the stimulation. He stares at the door handle, trying to ground himself and zones out.

His concentration is broken when he hears the clicking of heels approach him. His smug smile started to appear thinking that his victory was secured.

"That's all? I thought you were going--" His words were cut off when the sound of chains came from her hands. She crouched down and there was a sneer on her lips.

"You think that low of me, Sir?" Her lip curved up into a cruel smile and the source of the noise was revealed. Nipple clamps. There was a sharp intake of breath as the metal was snapped onto his flesh. Holding the clamps together was a chain which she used as support to lift herself to stand. The tug made a cry leave Victor, to the girl it wasn't hoarse enough too much clarity. She stood over Victor, drawing his face by the chin to look up to her. Her manicured nails felt so good against his scalp when they ran through his raven locks. Her other hand caressed his clenched jaw, soothing the intense look on Victor's face.

"Hmm, you're doing so well baby." That simple praise made Victor arch his back. The amusement that burnt in her eyes were clouded by lust. Victor again was left in the middle of his room, the clamps starting to make his nipples sore.

Another half hour passes when she comes back. She lightly taps on the clamps, making Victor cry out. There's a small laugh as her hands make her way down his chest. They skip over his neglected cock and straight towards the plug. With one push, Victor was sprawled on his back and legs spread in the air. She ran her nails along the back of his thighs, light red streaks following behind. Her fingers wrap around the base of the plug and Victor holds his breath. She pulls it out till the tip is left and pushes it back in instantly. She relentlessly thrusts the plug into Victor's ass. There's a snide smile as Victor writhes underneath her, his legs trying close but the metal bar prevents him. His back arches perfectly off the office rug, his small waist begging for hands to wrap around it. As the thrusts begin to pick up speed, Victor feels his mind slipping away from him. His moans are starting to become unrestrained and drawn out. When he feels his orgasm approaching, everything stops. His eyes snap open, he hadn't realised they had shut, and he looks towards the woman confused. She says nothing as she lifts Victor back onto his knees by his shoulder.

He's back to facing the door but the girl doesn't leave him. She moves behind him, her hands lingering around him. Leaving every nerve on edge.

"Is this what you call working?" His voice was shaky to start with but regained its bite towards the end.

"The report is being uploaded. Till it is done, I'm not finished." Victor felt her hands wrap around his torso. One trails up to tug on the chain and the other wraps around his cock. He falls back into her touch, head resting back on her shoulder. Victor looks up at her, mouth gaping open as the sensations take over his body once again. Her cool hand on his cock made him jerk hips and the vibrators shifted down. The vibrations were now concentrated on his balls, causing more ecstasy to run through his veins. Her hands leave his shaft and move lower, back to the plug. She moves her lips to his ears, kissing the shell before whispering.

"Will you be good?" The whimper from Victor was all she needed to continue her actions.

In the middle of his office, Victor was on the floor in the arms of the one he loved the most. Falling apart in the most delicious way. The stinging pain of his nipples, the torturous vibrations on his balls and the fast thrust of the plug made his mind break. The more he lost his control, the louder the moans grew. His thighs quivered, toes curling as he felt the familiar peak approaching. One last tug of the clamps bought Victor's ruin down on him. The burning in the pit of his stomach finally exploded out, coating his chest. He's left panting against her chest and as he comes down from his high is only then when he realises. Goldman was rattling the door handle and knocking confused. Then to his left sounded the ding of a completed file. She knew he’d lose.

Victor looks back towards her, eyes glazed over from his orgasm. In her eyes he looked like a lost puppy.

"You lost." Her lips were pulled into a victorious grin and honestly seeing that glee on her face was worth the loss. Victor, too enraptured in her, didn't notice Goldman leaving. She begins to kiss down his jaw, sweet praises leaving her lips to relax Victor's body. He whines against her lips to remove the vibrators and she laughs softly whilst removing them. Victor tended to get silent after an intense orgasm, his voice often hoarse from the constant crying out. There were tender kisses placed onto his nipples as the clamps were removed. Once everything was removed and cleaned, he moved to the couch, laying on top of the girl. She held his head against her chest, fingers running through his hair. Reassuring him that he did well even though he lost.

"The report better be good." He says begrudgingly after a beat of silence.

Only she knew how to take apart the composed character Victor had built. Only she knew how he spent his time. Only she knew how to make him lose control.

[nootgi]

My Captain - Beidou

A/N:// AHHHH I WROTE THIS AFTER THE HORRIBLE GRAMMY RESULTS! SO TAKE THIS BEIDOU. I wrote this with no direction and nearly went into 18+ but I think I’ll save that for next time, i might just add it on to this post since this is pretty short. 

The wind blew softly, its blows being caught in the white sails of the incoming ship. You watched as the ship slowly floated over, your body was practically hanging off the railings so you could look closely at the ship. The people at the harbour paid no attention to you, already used to you being there at the end of every month to search for your love. When the Crux returned from their voyages, it tended to be around the end of the month. The fact was pointed out to you by Ningguang after noticing you longingly stare out of the window towards the harbour. She laughed and teased you, taking delight in the red flush on your ears. She supported you and Beidou but you were her assistant for the upcoming project and couldn’t let your eyes stray. Whenever you were left on shore you would spend the days in suffocating silence, used to Beidou’s voice filling the void. 

When you’re unable to spot the familiar mark of the Crux, your excited shoulders sag in disappointment. Not this month, again. It was getting harder to be away from her for so long. You normally would join her on the longer voyages however things in Liyue kept you chained to it’s land whilst your love sailed away. You stand there for a while, enjoying the smell of the ocean in the evening air in an attempt to pep yourself up again. It worked a little bit since your body relaxed and the weight of disappointment lessened slightly but there was still a pout on your lips. 

“Hey there sailor, why the long face?” A voice shouted at you from behind, you spun around quickly to see the one person you longed to see. She stood there with her arms open and the wide grin on her face grew with every step she took towards you. Unable to hold yourself back you ran towards her, the others on the harbour just shook their heads and laughed as you threw yourself into Beidou’s arm. She pulled you as close as possible, lifting you up with her hands under your thighs and letting you wrap them around her waist. She adores holding you like this, being able to carry the most important treasure in the world was all she wanted during her time away. Your arms came up to wrap around her neck, resting your forehead on hers. She begins to walk towards the storage area to get some much needed privacy.

“I missed you.” You say softly, chest still heaving from the short sprint. Your eyes looked into her red one and you both were silent for a second. She lets your breath recover before leaning up to kiss you softly. Your hands come up to cup her cheeks, tilting your head to the side to let her lips press harder onto yours. Losing yourself in the kiss you don’t notice being pressed up against the wall, being held up by Beidou’s weight. You couldn’t help the little whimper that leaves you when she moves one of her hands up from your waist to go under your shirt. Your heart rate began to to pick up in anticipation, you missed her warmth and needed her desperately. 

“Mmm I know my sailor missed me, but we can’t get too carried away now can we?” She broke the kiss, smiling at your chasing lips. She left a soft peck on your pouty lips before pulling herself away completely. With your feet back on the ground, you become more aware of your surroundings. Your cheeks burned as you realised that you got so carried away in somewhere so public. 

“Ah look at your cute face, it looks like someone’s been drinking without me!” Beidou’s signature laugh filled your ears and you jumped up to quickly silence her. She simply took the hand that tried to cover her mouth in hers and intertwined your fingers. Her amusement never stopped as she walked through Liyue holding your hand, telling you all about the new perils she encountered and how much she missed going to drink with her favourite first mate. You met up with Ningguang, who teamed up with Beidou to tease you even further,  you swore that your head was going to explode with how much blood was rushing through there. You had tea in the Jade Chamber, Beidou’s voice filling the halls once again and while Ningguang can pretend she didn’t miss it, you caught her hiding her smile behind her teacup. It felt like a huge veil was lifted off your eyes, the torch glow was brighter and usual chatter felt softer on your ears. That was just the effect Beidou had on you. 

You went to your usual bar, met with your usual friends but even then Beidou’s heart has never felt so fulfilled. You were her other half and not having you around felt wrong. She may not show it as much, but the voyage took a lot more out of her. She missed having your support on the seas, even as a captain it was nice to have someone to lean on especially if it’s you. When the burden of the captain became too much, you were there to support her through it all. When there was an unruly crewmate, you would reassure her that the choices she makes are just and accepted by the others, reducing her worries. The ocean breeze was nowhere near as refreshing as seeing you asleep in her bed, curled up and waiting for her to engulf you in her arms.“You’re being quiet. What’s wrong?” It was just like you, always being able to read her. You were so small but your impact was like a cannonball, leaving her all burning up and you with an easy entrance into her heart. “Nothing, I’m just thinking about this moment and what will come next.” she whispers softly back to you. You looked at her with your eyebrows raised, wanting her to go on further. “We still have to finish what we started on the harbour Sailor.” Soft plush lips pressed against your neck, promising you that the night is still very young and successfully distracting you from your own question.

[nootgi]

Spotlight

MLQC Victor

MC deals with the drag of life and tries to face her emotions. Will she accept the hand that reaches out to her or push them away like she always does.

A/N: HHH victor is my biggest comfort character so it feels right to get back into writing with him. Also one of my favourite fic tags hurt/comfort! I hope you enjoy it ^-^ 

Word count: 4478

There was a white light shining above me and the brightness pried my eyes open. When my eyes finally adjusted I was standing, surrounded by darkness. All there was, was a bright spotlight. 

I tried moving my body but it felt like lead, stuck in its place no matter how much I struggled. My mouth was too dry to cry out, the only thing that seemed to respond was my eyes. They bounced around, trying their best to understand but there was nothing in the dark abyss. A small whimper slipped out of my throat and suddenly the shadows began to move. 

One by one, eyes started to appear, all so familiar yet so cold. All the warmth was taken from them but the piercing one of them all were those ruthless purple eyes. They were so sharp as if cutting into my soul and laying my faults out to bare, so calculating as they judged me. Desperately I tried to defend myself but nothing came out except pathetic sobs, my face stung in the cold void from the downpour of tears. 

In the middle of a sea of darkness, eyes judged me as I lost myself. 

My eyes snapped open and I found myself in my apartment. My body shivered from the cold sweat mixed the draft from the open window beside my desk. It seems I fell asleep whilst working on Victor's proposal…

Victor… What was that dream? My brows furrowed as I tried to remember the dream but the more I tried, the more it broke apart. All I remember was the cold. My deep thoughts were disrupted by my phone alarm ringing, when I turned off it's obnoxious beeping, it set in that it was Monday. The start of a new week, the bright beginning! To shed the dead weight of last week and get to it!! The sheer thought of putting on that mask made me groan. The past week has been draining to say the least, Kiro's behind the scenes set was swarmed with fans, leading to extra security detail to be reviewed and approved. Then Reek messed up a sponsorship deal which meant the whole episode had to be re-filmed but since it was such short notice some guests couldn't attend. That in turn caused some public backlash which caused many late nights of apology to passionate fans. With so much on my plate, I couldn't help but look eagerly towards the weekend already. Just 5 days, that's just 120 hours. 

I put on my shiba slippers and walked towards the bathroom, able to take it slow this morning since it was a late start. When my light flickered on, I glanced up into the mirror to catch my reflection for a second before looking away. If you look too closely every flaw will bloom. I brush my teeth, staring at the tap like it was the most interesting thing in the world. Probably was in this apartment honestly. Once my bathroom routine was finished, I started to prepare breakfast when my phone rang again for the second time. 

"Anna? What's up?" I answered with a yawn, looking at the calendar hung on the wall. 

"Have you forgotten!? Today's presentation day!!" I gasped as I saw the red circle and arrows all point to this day. 

"It slipped my mind! I'm coming as fast as possible so please hold them off!!" My words tumbled out as I stopped all my breakfast preparations, throwing on my clothes and heels. Anna gave me a 30 minute window as a maximum. Once I got my files together, I sprinted out of the apartment. Mowing over my landlady who grumbled about running in hallways. I couldn't stop, this was too important. 

'You can't even remember something so important as this? You really are pathetic.' 

No time to address my thoughts, I reach the LFG building in record time. In front Anna stood there with a coffee and a grim smile. I took the coffee out of her hand, chugging it down, not knowing when my next break was. We walked quickly across the lobby as Anna filled me in on who was attending this talk. Ever since the company took off, more and more investors have begun to take an interest. If this talk goes well, we can begin to take on bigger and better productions… create a company dad would be proud of. Just the thought of it made my heart leap. 

When we stopped in front of the boardroom, Anna turned to me with a frown. She began to fuss over my hair, my skirt and the messily tucked shirt. I try to bat her hands away, not wanting to keep them waiting when a dark shadow looms over the two of us. I turn around quickly, getting immediately absorbed by sharp purple orbs. Victor. Just as I was about to speak, a sharp pricked my heart and cut my words short. There was something building up in my chest, like a string being wound up so tightly. 

"You're late." He says bluntly, it feels like he's speaking down at me…

"Sorry, just slipped my mind." My words left me before I could stop them, Anna looked over at me with her eyes wide. 

"If this kind of talk 'slips your mind' maybe you shouldn't be here at all." He doesn't pull any punches, huh? Brushing past the two of us to enter the room. Anna reaches out to pat my shoulder but I turn around with a practiced smile. 

"Let's do our best!" She nods reluctantly and enters the room. I take a few moments to relax my clenched fists and push down the emotion blooming in my chest. This is business, nothing more. Once again that mask slips on and the talks begin. 

After a long 5 hours, the end is finally called allowing me and Anna to collapse into our desk chairs. Both groaning at the ache in our feet and relief that the end is in sight. All that's left is the investors to speak amongst themselves and begin preparations should they choose to back us. 

"I need to go pee!" Anna blurts out weirdly, standing up instantly. I look at her questioningly, watching her back as she sprints off to the toilet. Guess she really needed to pee..? Thinking I was alone I let myself sink back into my thoughts. In my mind the talk replayed over and over, every little mistake stuck out. The long pauses between a question and answer, words and numbers blending into one and worst of all my voice cracking. Slowly the small regrets spiral into a kaleidoscope of my worst moments. All the shame and embarrassment caused the red in my cheeks to burn and my eyes glaze over. 

'How could someone like you ever make him proud?' Those words slip venom into my thoughts as the bright office lights are dimmed by the shadows growing. Suddenly the space around me changes and again I feel piercing eyes surround me. They're judging me. Who wouldn't? My skirt is short, my shirt is wrinkled and my hair is hardly in the ponytail anymore. The chances of getting the investment seemed bleaker, the tension in my chest grew more insistent. I tried to ground myself, digging my nails into my palms and looked around to distract myself. 

Just a few more hours and the fragile mask can be put to rest for today. 

"Earth to dummy?" Fingers snap in front of my face and I'm dragged back into the bright office light. Victor was standing beside me, a frown etched into his usual poker face. 

"Yes? Sorry." I look back down instantly, trying to avoid his eyes. My hands began to fidget causing me to hide them under my thighs. 

"Are you okay? You don't seem… like your usual self." He pauses, thinking of a way to phrase his sentence. When my mouth opens to respond my mind is conflicted between two responses. The truth or the usual lie… what good would come from the truth? 

"Nothing, just monday blues." I shoot him a tired smile, as his mouth opens to press on further Goldman returns to call us back to the room. Anna arrives at the same time and immediately we're swept back into the business talk. 

… In the end… WE GOT THE FUNDING! Me and Anna screamed at each other as soon as we stepped outside of LFG. Passerbys looked at us oddly but we couldn't bring ourselves to care. This was definitely the push our company needed to grow. We rush back to the office to tell the team the great news. Willow, Kiki and Minor upon hearing the great news suggest a night out. A round of drinks to toast to our future. Feeling the adrenaline from this morning leave my body, I pass on the celebration but promise to treat them all to lunch one day. The company closed early, the spirits bright, warm and lifted. You couldn't tell it was monday. 

So why is it that I feel so hollow? 

As I leave the building with the gang, Anna pulls me aside. 

"Just know I'm here for you." Those simple words gave a prick of warmth, my smile is just a ghost by this point. I just nod, fearing if I speak that knot in my throat would snap. I waved them all off and began my walk home. The crisp autumn wind kept my lonely self company, dancing around my body and trying to enter the warmth of my clothes. 

There was nothing to occupy my thoughts other than the crunch of the leaves under my boots. Anna's words and Anna's warm smile replayed in my mind, chipping away at my resolve built out of ice. I want to reach out, I want to talk but every time I cry out I'm silenced. Why should my darkness taint their light? Why must I burden them with nothing? There was swell of emotions that caused my footsteps to increase till I began full sprinting down the street. My lungs and legs burned as I collapsed inside my apartment. 

The mask finally shattered and the ugly emotions bubbled out of my chest. Sobs wracked my body and my arms wrapped around myself. 

On my cold apartment floor, I cried myself to sleep. 

There was a knock at my door, breaking my sleep at the very first rasp. My body was stiff from the floor and my eyes felt puffy. Rubbing my eyes a little aggressively, I open the door and see a delivery driver. I tilt my head confused as he leaves a bag in my hand, leaving without payment. I locked up my door once again, putting the bag down in the kitchen to retrieve my phone. It was 11pm. There were a few drunken texts from Minor and pictures from the girls updating on their night out. I laughed fondly at the picture of Minor with his ass stuck in a bush when Victor's face flashes on the screen. He's calling me. My mind blanks as I let the phone ring, once the call drops I let out a sigh of relief. 

With that the days blended into one repetitive cycle, each moment becoming more taxing than the next. It was always paperwork, meetings, filming and then home. My only relief is the click of my front door locking. I settled down at my desk with some cup ramen and began my work again. This is the quarterly report for Victor, it had to be perfect. Otherwise- I don't think I could handle his critique. If you could even call it that… more like an emperor looking a gladiator in the eyes as he puts his thumb down, sentencing the poor soul to death. I laugh slightly at the thought of Emperor Victor, he is a good leader, confident and smart. Yet compassionate and looks out for the little guys. I don't think there is a thing in the world that can shake Victor. He's so perfect, you forget that he is only human. 'Stupid perfect Victor and his perfectly perfect hair and his handsome face.' I grumbled to myself, finishing my dinner and getting back to work. 

When I put my empty cup ramen down, the heavy weight of the fork inside knocks it down onto the floor. The clattering sound echoes around the apartment, serving as a reminder that I'm alone. I groan and get up to clean when I finally take notice of my room. Clothes, fresh or used, thrown across the room, my snacking habits revealed from the countless chip packets, cup ramen and chocolate wrappers. When did my room get like this? When I turn to my desk I see the building pile of used dishes from weeks ago, there was even dust beginning to collect on them. I should clean… 

Finding no motivation to clean, my productive flow was cut off for today. No matter where I looked, there was some sort of reminder of my failures. That feeling in my chest had started to build again so I climbed into bed. Surrounding myself in the only warmth I could accept, I laid there tracing patterns onto the duvet mindlessly. Time ticked away as the warm glow of the evening diminished into darkness. I didn't even move from the bed to turn the light on, the darkness far more comforting. In all that time the only thought through my head was: I'm lonely. 

It was my own fault really, I push everyone away the second I feel bad. I'm too busy drowning in my own pity that I can't help people that need help more. I'm disgusting. Pathetic even. Crying over something I caused myself, over something that could be so easily solved! Even when that painfully obvious truth was there my heart remained shut, not letting in the people most dear to me. 

Another memory began to play in my mind. Stood in my teacher's office. My head was bowed, my eyes focused on the fidgeting of my fingers, as he scolded me over crying about his harsh feed. 'This is life!' and 'Stop being so fragile!' played in my mind. You shouldn't be here. Victor! My gasp slips out as I realise that I'm sobbing, my pillow drenched. I sat up, trying to supress my loud sobs and held my hand against my heart that felt like it was beating out my chest. Stop- Stop, Stop! I begged myself to calm down, feeling that I was losing control on the emotions I reigned in so tightly. 

That night, I cried alone in the darkness of my apartment. Begging for anyone to save me.

After that night I decided to take a sick day, feeling unready to feel the world's cold embrace. Anna had offered to present the report to Victor but I rejected it saying that I could still do it. I picked up my phone, opening my contacts and almost dropped it at the amount of missed calls from Victor. Had I been avoiding him that much? I clicked on his chat to see his messages, all seemingly concerned but who wouldn't worry over their 'investments'? If to borrow a few words from Victor. I was about to click off till Victor's face popped up as a call. Out of habit I picked up instantly, my body responding slowly to my mind screaming no. As I scolded myself mentally, I heard from the CEO after almost 2 weeks. 

"Hello? Are you there?" There was some traffic in the background, he must have been just walking into the office. 

"...Yes-! Hello Sir!" Great response said no-one.

"Sir? I thought I told you to call me Victor. Anyway I decided to call since I've been notified that a certain little idiot is sick." He heard already? I only told Anna… 

"Y-yeah, really sick- You shouldn't worry though!! Only a small hiccup, should be back on my feet tomorrow." I wave my hands around even though he can't see me. There was a pause only hearing the ding of an elevator. 

"I hope it is, business doesn't stop for anyone but… If you need anything at all, just- call me." The way he spoke so tenderly at the end caused my knees to shake and my eyes to well up again. It's there! The hand that I could reach out to…

"Thank you Victor, goodbye." My voice threatened to break as the knot started to tighten again. I couldn't possibly drag him into this mess, drag him into me. The well of tears remained on the edge, threatening to spill as Victor bid his farewell too. I knew there was more he wanted to say but he also knew I didn't want to hear more. When the phone call ended, I dropped back down into my bed and stared up towards the ceiling. What shall I do today? 

The apartment felt too stuffy for me so I decided to take a walk, my legs carried me to the park. Despite it being autumn there were still children running around, jumping into piles of orange leaves or the old man that fed the bird by the fountain. I walked towards the fountain, taking a seat a few spaces away from the man. I had accidentally spooked some of the birds but they settled back down. I had apologised to the man but he laughed and shook his head. 

"You were more cautious of these birds than any busy body in this city." He says gesturing to the few people that sprinted through the park, holding briefcases or speaking rapidly into their phones. That would've been me too… 

"I would've been them on any other day." I force a sad laugh and look up to the sky.

"That's the problem with you young uns, always pushing yerselves too hard. Though I cannot pass judgement, I was the same back in my hay days!" When I finally look back at him, he keeps his eyes trained on the birds he feeds. 

"How did you… escape it?" Was there a way to get out without hurting anyone around me, without burdening them?

"The answer is so simple my dear, find your warm place." My warm place? Where could that be? My eyes catch a scene of a father holding his daughter tightly in his arms as she cries over her scratched knee. My eyes widen as I watch him tickle her, raising her high above his head to bring back the smile on his daughter's face. The man watches with me, his eyes holding the same nostalgia that rings in my heart. 

"And… If your warm space is gone? Then what?" 

"They never leave you. Just as a river never flows the same forever, you can find comfort from elsewhere but that doesn't change the memories of the past. The path it has carved remains." It was true that my father was the only one I could confide in with my emotions. He read me like an open book at times. I used to think it was because dad had a superpower but he always told me 'If I didn't know what my princess was thinking what kind of papa would I be!' Is there anybody that I could trust like that? 

"If you don't mind my asking, what is your warm space?" I turn to the old man and see he's already gone, the birds around still remain undisturbed. I guess that's my time at the park, done. I got up, deciding to stop by convenience store to get some more snacks. What could my space be?

Just like that another month flashes by and the final contracts have been signed. Miracle Finder has gained another 2 investors through LFG. In order to celebrate, Victor had arranged a party to be held. I say party- it was more of a formal ball! When I asked Victor about it he just said his typical response 'This is a networking event, whilst it might be to celebrate the company I hope you don't grow complacent.' UGH! Stupid Victor!! I screamed in my head as I entered the main hall and was instantly submerged into the high class society. The long night of fake smiles had just begun and my mood was just not there. However it felt nice to see my late night studying of the guestlist was paying off. The whole time at the party I felt his eyes on me but he never once approached me. Every time I couldn't look back at them. 

The night was going well but my feeling of dread continued to grow and grow. Not being able to shake it off, my discomfort was apparent enough for Mr Kim to point it out. 

"Are the old men scaring you Miss." He laughs, the group joining in on the laughter. I try to force a laugh, sounding more like a cry for help, I shake my hand. 

"No no! It's not like tha-" I get cut off as the group bursted into laughter and just like that my dream flashes in front of my eyes. The chandelier that hung above us feeling like the spotlight, the men's loud laughter attracting the prying eyes of everyone around. People began to whisper and hiding their smiles behind their hands. They're laughing at me. I bow trying to excuse myself but Mr Kim reaches for my hands. In panic I slapped them away and ran off and I failed to notice the pair of sharp violet filling with rage. 

Cold winter air bit at my cheeks as they glowed red and cooled the warm tears staining them. My mind conjuring up the worst scenarios, adding more straws to the camel's back. I need to regain control- I can't show weakness! If I can't handle this, I'm not worthy for the company. What would dad say? Would he wipe away your tears or try to fight those men. My laughter escapes me when I think of my Dad. 

"Laughing and crying? If anyone saw you they'd think you're insane." That deep voice rang out from the balcony door. I turn around and see Victor walk towards me, his suit jacket hung in his arms. Those words had a teasing tone but his face was tense, jaw clenched and brows furrowed. Without thinking I meet Victor half way, reaching up to soothe his eyebrows. Despite his shock he leaned into my touch, face slowly relaxing into the usual poker face. Even this close I couldn't look him in the eyes. I could feel his search my eyes but I kept mine trained on his tie. With a sigh he takes a handkerchief from his pocket to wipe my eyes softly, the soft material soothing the rough skin. 

"Dummy." Those words caused my dam to burst as I fell into Victor's embrace, crying. He said nothing, holding me tightly till I tired myself out. 

That night I cried in his warm embrace, that protected me from the cold winter's night. 

When my eyes opened I was still on the balcony, laying on the bench covered by Victor's suit jacket. My head was resting on his lap as he looked out at the night view. Still in a tired daze I stare up at his face. The city lights created an orange glow that caressed his face and defined every single one of his perfect features. My eyes trail up his face from his lips to his nose and when they finally reach his eyes, he's looking back. With a gasp I sit up.

"Finally awake? I wasn't expecting you to snore so much." He says, a slight quirk to his lips. 

"I do not snore!" I gasped and hit his shoulder lightly till I realized what I did. When I was going to apologise he rubs where I hit him and frowns. 

"Someone's getting bold lately." His tone was serious but his eyes were nothing but playful. It caused a genuine laugh to bubble out and my cheeks puffed as my smile was pulled widely. When my laughter died down, I realised I was looking Victor in his eyes. Were they his eyes? Instead of the sharp purple blades they were like a soft vortex, swirling with stars and emotion. My words were stolen as I got lost in his galaxy.

"Looking into eyes now?" His voice was soft, practically a whisper but it was the only sound in the frozen night. 

"I- I was so scared." I admit to him. Victor reaches to tuck my hair behind my ears, the simple gesture causing my heart to race. 

"You don't need to fear me. I'm here for you." Those words again, the hand is there again. Tentatively I stretch my arm, placing my hand in his warm palms. In his hands I place my trust. A river never flows the same forever. 

There was a white light shining above me and the brightness pried my eyes open. When my eyes finally adjusted I was standing, surrounded by darkness. But this time was different. In darkness shined a pair of purple eyes, they drew closer to me. My eyes tightened shut as he entered the spotlight. I was terrified, I didn't want to fall again. He wiped the tears that poured down my face and whispered into my ears. 

"Open your eyes." I trusted him. I opened my eyes and the eyes that were cold were illuminated with light. The eyes turned into familiar faces, filled with warmth. 

Anna stood there with a supportive smile. Willow, Kiki and Minor were grinning from ear to ear. It was like a fog being lifted from my mind, I saw everything with new clarity. There was still darkness but never once was I alone. He was always by my side. My eyes snapped open as my phone began to ring. 

Ah! I must've fallen asleep whilst watching TV! I picked up my phone and it was a call from Anna.

"Boss! I sure hope you're ready for the storm coming…" In the background I heard Kiki whine at the comment and Minor cheer excitedly.

"I'm more than ready." I laugh, looking at my cleaned up apartment, not a stray sock or wrapper in sight. Food was cooking in the oven for the home party. The sun shone through the open curtains, its rays falling onto a photo of my father. Beside that was the matching shiba cups I had gotten with Victor.

Everyone faces their own demons, but that doesn't mean you should do it alone. I learnt that the hand wasn't to drag me out of the abyss but to connect our lights and face the dark together. 

[nootgi]

Warmth; Victor

The warmth never fades, nor does the moment from our memories.

A/n:// this is something I wrote whilst in my Victor hours and reacting to the new karma.

The sky was pitchblack in the wintery night. The snow was endless that the light from the street lights were drowned out. I walked carefully on the snowy sidewalk towards Souvenir, to see Victor. We had planned to meet to talk through my proposal since he was too swamped today. The cold wind stabbed my legs as I finally stopped in front of the familiar door. 

Victor has been really busy lately... I wonder if he's resting enough. When I visited today I could practically see the dark circles from the door. His tie was loose and his eyebrows would furrow even more with every ring of the phone. He's really dedicated to his work but how could you be an effective leader if you don't sleep enough! I think to myself, practising what I will say to Victor- if it isn't properly structured he'd just tease me! Now that got me spiralling in a different train of thought causing me to pout.

"What are you doing?" The door opened and the warm welcoming light of Souvenir created a heavenly glow around him. Unable to recover I just gape at his face. He sighs and opens his mouth to speak but then... The wind got stronger, blowing in snow into Victor and my skirt to blow up. In my fluster I try to enter Souvenir quickly, losing my footing on the icy floor. My eyes shut tightly as I feel myself fall back, my arms flail to grab onto something. Feeling Victor's collars in my fists... Suddenly falling sounds better than this. With my eyes shut I don't notice the panic on Victor's face as his hands rush out to grab my waist. A few inches off the ground Victor had caught me but it had drawn us out of the safety of Souvenir's door. Victor's broad shoulders protected me from the downpour of snow but... his back. 

My eyes open to stare up at him, his face is in his usual composure and the familiar teasing light glitters in his eyes.

"What? Cat got your tongue?" He smirks slightly- his face is near and his scent enveloped me. 

"I- Thank you! You can let go now!!" I practically scream into his face, my pitch peaking for a second. The warmth in my cheeks was now positively a burning flame. Victor winces at the volume and stands up, once steady, he helps me stand. His warm hands held my waist for only a second but even when he moved away I still felt warmth. Once straightened up I offer Victor a bright sheepish smile to which he shakes his head to with a sigh. He turns around to walk back into Souvenir, stopping to hold out his hand. 

"Can't trust miss clumsy not to fall again."

"I'm not clumsy!!" I try to protest as I step forward, almost instantly proving Victor right by stumbling. Begrudgingly I take Victor's hand and despite only being able to see his back I could feel the winning smugness radiating off his face. I stare at Victor's back, realising his back is soaked. 

"Victor, your back-"

"Lets get inside first dummy." He cuts me off and once we're in the warm hallway of Souvenir he lets go of my hand to lock the door. I walk in, instantly shedding off my wet coat, hat and scarf to hang up. It was warm inside but not warm enough.. Whilst Victor is busy, I decided to make a warm drink but all Victor has is coffee. Should I? I mean he needs something warm. I space out staring at the kettle that is still boiling. Victor walks in, watching with exasperation when he realises I spaced out again. 

"Are you okay? You've been spacing out a lot lately." He says, walking over to place his hand on my forehead. Unconsciously I press into Victor's hand, loving the warmth of his palms. 

"I'm okay, you should sit down! I'll make some coffee and we can start," I say after a moment of silence, finally looking up to meet Victor's eyes, "I guess winter doesn't even spare Victor!" I point to Victor's slightly red cheeks. Realising Victor would be feeling cold from his back, I go to get the present I got him a while back. When I approach Victor with the familiar rabbit blanket he sighs and says nothing whilst he bent slightly so I can drape it over his back. Now that I know he's wrapped up I shoo him out to sit by the heater to make him some coffee. 

"I'm not red from the winter dummy."

Once the coffee was mixed I hesitated on adding sugar, does he like his coffee with as much bite as himself? Without tasting I added a teaspoon of sugar and walked out to hand it to him. He was leaning against the window frame, holding the files I gave him earlier. Before when I had grabbed onto his collar, it unbuttoned his top two buttons and his hair was soft as ever despite the avalanche that landed on his head outside. He noticed I was paused in the door frame, the simple tilt of his head instantly made me move. His sharp eyes watching every step I took when I approached him with coffee. He carefully put down the file to accept the coffee and thanked me. For some reason I felt nervous as Victor took a sip, my hands were held behind me and my fingers kept fidgeting. 

Suddenly Victor grimaced and started to cough. 

"What's wrong!?" I panic, rushing back to the kitchen to get him some water. 

"Some idiot doesn't know the difference between sugar and salt." I blink once… I blink twice. Then began to ramble.

"H-How was I supposed to know! Usually your salt is in a shaker and sugar is in a jar! Who leaves things like that in just a bowl. You know you should label things, anyone can make a mistake like-" My face returns to it's reddened state, one that is common with the company of Victor. I get cut off by a violent shiver wracking my body. Victor, who was watching with some amusement and slight annoyance, put down the doomed coffee to pull me close by my wrist. 

My body instantly went towards the warmth of his, like two magnets, sticking close together. My arms wrapped around his torso, clenching his shirt in my fists as the shivering wouldn't stop. I felt his right arm curve around my shoulder and his left securing around my waist. It felt like I was wrapped up in a warm winter's blanket. The warmth of Victor covered me head to toe and somehow heat even bloomed inside of me. My heart had never felt so warm. My head rested on his chest, above his heart but even then I couldn't tell if the heavy beating was from me or him… Maybe it was both of us. For a few moments we stay like that, holding each other close with not a single gap between. 

"You were so worried for me, you forgot about yourself dummy." Victor's chest rumbled as he softly spoke, worried that any louder might shatter the moment. His right hand came up to cup my cheek, his thumb caressing it softly. 

"You need to rest, you've been so busy lately that I can't help but wonder if you're looking after yourself." My hand comes up to hold Victor's hand, fingers curling around his palm. My eyes peer into his and the sharp edge of his eyes have disappeared and all that's left is warmth. I hope that warmth never fades.

"You don't have to worry about me, I promised that I will always come back to you. Didn't I?" Our fingers intertwined and the locking of our pinkies reminded me of that moment. The moment he promised to remain by my side forever. Bursting with love I lean up to kiss Victor…

"Besides that's how I always feel about you given your track record." He says with a hint of a laugh, watching with softness as I begin to complain about him ruining the moment and how these things pass by quickly.  

What I never realised was that the endless snow had frozen in the sky. 

The end ♡

[nootgi]

Hello,do you have a masterlist?

Hi! i dont currently have one, i wasn’t expecting writing this much so i wasn’t ready :’D but it’s in the work! in the meantime ill just tag my stories with nootieml to help!!