#none of them believed for a second that eddie was dead

[hairmetal666]

Eddie Munson doesn't believe in love at first sight. It's hopeless romanticism, childish fantasy, another way the straights just aren't okay. He's not wrong--look how love at first sight worked out for Romeo and Juliet, both dead by the final act. Couldn't be him.

This makes him strong, he thinks. Smart.

He won't end up like his parents, infatuated for six months, and then years of his mom's sleepless nights as his dad came home less and less.

He's never been sold on the whole white picket fence thing. The world's let him know that it's not meant for him, no matter how many millions of records sold and dollars earned. Plus, he's seen the most beautiful men in the world, slept with many of them, and none of them enticed him for more than a good time.

The band's on a break--after a hit record, a sold out world tour, a couple of Grammy's, they deserve it--plus, the other Corroded guys, they have serious relationships, families, the aforementioned white picket fence. It's been him and Wayne for as long as he cares to remember, and he loves his uncle more than anything, but when the offer comes in to solo headline a festival in Australia, he doesn't hesitate.

He has songs, plenty of them, that don't quite fit Corroded Coffin's sound. There's never going to be an Eddie Munson solo album, at least he's never really considered it, so why not play this stuff in a 'one night only' kind of deal? Plus, he loves festivals, the atmosphere, the music, the delirious rush of it all.

He gets a lot of flack in industry rags for being a music snob, and sure he has strong opinions about metal, but he listens to and loves a wide range of artists across all genres. It's why he's so good at his job. At any festival, he considers it a professional duty to check out as many of the acts as he can, especially the ones he doesn't know yet.

He's waiting for a performance right now, pushed up against the barricade, hoodie on, tattoos obscured, piercings removed, hair in a tight bun, dark glasses his hiding eyes. He hadn't recognized this name in the line- up, the stylized SH, and the only stage decoration is a black backdrop, white letters spelling out, "Shhh," the outline of a finger over cherry red lips. It's cute, Eddie thinks.

He checks his phone, just for a second, and in the space of that moment, the crowd begins to cheer. He looks up, eager for his first glimpse of SH.

A man crosses the stage towards the mic, guitar slung across his chest. He's wearing a yellow polo and a pair of Levi's so tight Eddie's already about to get down on his knees and repent. He's got this coiffed shock of brown hair, a face dotted with freckles, perfectly kissable pink lips. Eddie's seen the hottest men in the world, slept with most of them, but this guy, this guy, is the prettiest one, and somehow he'd never considered pretty.

SH lifts his arms to wave to the crowd, and his polo is short, right, maybe cropped, so the move exposes a large expanse of his stomach. And Eddie, he knows abs, but never before have they been this perfect for biting, can already imagining the give beneath his teeth.

Eddie is transfixed, mesmerized, totally enamored, and he doesn't realize at first that the noise of the crowd, of SH's banter, has blanked into nothingness. It's only the shape of him, the awareness of his existence, that bleeds through.

He watches the stage, mouth wide, as the man's fingers find their places on the strings, as he begins to play music Eddie can't hear over the electric sizzle of his blood, the fuzzed out distortion of his heartbeat.

He has a moment to think, no, this isn't supposed to happen to me before SH begins to sing. The crisp tone of his voice is the only thing Eddie hears, hits him like the sharp buzz of an amplifier, reverberates through him like a plucked guitar string.

Oh no, he thinks. Not this. But there's no outrunning it.

He watches the performance in awe, eyes never leaving SH, immovable for the entire set, slack-jawed with wonder and sensory overload. Too soon SH is introducing the band, names Eddie can't decipher, says, "I'm Steve Harrington, thank you!"

Steve. Steve Harrington. Steve dances in a circle around his brain.

Even once Steve leaves the stage, Eddie doesn't move. He stands at the barricade, knuckles gone white where they clutch the metal, mind whirling. He's done for, a goner, how could this happen, how could this happen, how could this happen.

He stays as the crowd drifts away, as crew pack up instruments and cords, and different crew brings out new equipment. He stays as people trickle up for the next scheduled act, until he's surrounded, and only then does reality click back into focus.

Shoving his way out of the crowd, he rushes backstage, hastily presenting his VIP badge to security. He's too late, he's sure. He spent too much time processing, and surely Steve is gone now, back to an RV or a hotel or boarding an airplane. And maybe that's for the best, Eddie isn't meant for this, Eddie isn't--

Voices stop him in his tracks, a gaggle of children shouting over each other, blending into a cacophony, and in the middle of it all is Steve.

"All I said was that your set starts in five minutes. Why are you yelling at me?"

A girl with long red hair puts a straw to her lips, a spitball hitting Steve square in the forehead.

"Who says we're mad?" She asks, as the wet paper unsticks from his skin, plopping to the floor.

With that, the whole crew of them bop towards the stage, leaving Steve with an annoyed smile on his face.

"Those fucking kids," he says to someone out of Eddie's line of sight. The undertone is alarmingly fond given the sentiment.

Suddenly, the distance between them is too much, and his feet are moving, bringing him closer.

Steve is still talking, but Eddie's movement catches his attention, has him throwing a glance down the hall. He stops mid-sentence, sitting straighter in his chair, a bemused little smile spreading across his mouth.

It's too much, stops Eddie in his tracks, takes his breath. It doesn't stop Steve, though. He's standing and crossing the distance between them before Eddie so much as blinks.

"Hi," he says, when they're toe to toe, when he can see every green speck in Steve's shining hazel eyes. He takes off his sunglasses.

"Hi," Steve answers in a half-whisper, awestruck.

They stare at each other, both smiling.

"Can I kiss you?" Eddie asks.

"Might die if you didn't."

He wraps his hand around the back of Steve's neck, draws him in, holds their lips a hairsbreadth apart. With a sigh, Steve closes the distance, slotting their mouths together.

Eddie Munson doesn't believe in love at first sight, but as Steve's lips part for him, he has to admit this might be one of the rare occasions where he's wrong. After that first taste, there's no doubt that his happiness begins and ends with Steve Harrington. Irrevocably, forever.

They part, gently, noses still touching. Steve's smile is like the sunrise, bright, breathtaking.

"I've been waiting for you," Steve says.

"You have?"

"My whole life."

"Sorry I made you wait, sweetheart. It won't happen again."

I swear that I saw a post with a pic from Djo's first Coachella set with a premise that it was Eddie's first glimpse of Steve and he falls hopelessly in love with him, which obviously inspired this fic, and I can't find that post at all to give credit. So, if anyone knows remembers a post like this, let me know so I can credit for the inspo!

[moonchildreads]

don't you know what the night can do?

summary: you call for help in the middle of the night and eddie comes to your rescue

pairing: best friend!eddie x reader

tags/warnings: mdni. technically a college au? depression, abusive relationship (not eddie, he's a sweetie), talks of potential homelessness, no SA happens but eddie thinks it did for a second before it's cleared up (again, it does NOT happen, but since it could be triggering consider this your warning), hurt/comfort, happy ending!

wc: 2.8k

a/n: i was supposed to post this yesterday but upon rereading it i realised it was me trauma dumping so i rewrote a significant portion of this to make it into it's own thing. i hope it brings you as much comfort for you as it did for me, and if you are in a situation like reader is, please seek help. i believe in you and i am rooting for you 🖤

Now's the time when it's down to me and you Spread these wings, we'll be flying

It’s already late when the phone rings and he’s immediately shoving his feet into his sneakers, rushing out the door of his apartment and into his van. It’s even more late when he parks across the street and decides against waking your entire building up by ringing your doorbell. Hurriedly, he searches his glove box for that little spare key you gave him for emergencies - the one that has a big metal ring and a tiny plastic tab with your name on it. He lets himself in, the storm outside in the sky and inside your head getting worse and worse every second that ticks by.

Eddie finds you slumped against the small table where your phone rests, the receiver still in your hand, and he knows. He knows something terrible has happened and it doesn’t matter that he’s been anticipating it ever since you told him you’d begun dating that asshole classmate of yours because nothing could have prevented his heart from shattering the moment he sees you.

You’re a lifeless looking doll, devoid of any emotion and feeling. He’d fear you’re actually dead if he couldn’t see your chest rising and falling slowly.

“Sweetheart?” he says, lowering himself to where you’re sitting and trying not to spook you. “Are you okay?”

“Huh?” you say, almost surprised when his eyes come into view. “You’re here.”

“Yeah, baby, of course I’m here,” he shuffles closer to you, but still doesn’t touch you.

Eddie swears he can still feel your arms around his neck sometimes, how your hands always used to find his, and how your legs would tangle on the couch all the time. You don’t like to be touched too much these days. He misses your warmth.

“Are you okay?” he repeats.

“Cold.”

“You’re cold? Come on, let’s get you to bed.”

“NO!”

Your voice rings loud in the quiet apartment, your eyes locking with his in a fiery yet terrified stare. What are you so afraid of? Eddie takes in your appearance and it’s clear that you’ve been crying, though he doesn’t really understand why. He peers into the hallway that leads to your bedroom, searching for answers though he finds none.

“I- I’m sorry… I made a mess,” you explain, deflating once more. “I was upset and the sheets, they… they’re not on the bed anymore.”

“That’s okay,” Eddie says. “We can put them back on.”

You afford him a movement that barely registers as a nod and he thinks he hasn’t seen duller eyes in his entire life, except for when he used to look into the mirror when he was younger. You shouldn’t feel like that, not if he can help it. He raises up onto his knees, still keeping his distance but signaling that it’s time to get up.

“It’s late, sweetheart. Come on, you need to get some sleep.”

“Can… can I get a hug first? Please?” you whisper, your face contorting into a pitiful sight.

Eddie doesn't say anything before he pulls you into a tight hug, his arms shielding you from anything and everything that might be trying to hurt you. He lets you bury yourself into him, lets you crawl underneath his skin and bones, become a part of his very soul and he holds you tighter whenever you exhale another heavy breath.

He waits and waits with his ass turning into ice on the harsh linoleum floor of your kitchenette area, and he doesn’t let go before you do because you once read to him that you should always hug kids until they let go first and he still hasn’t forgotten about it. A booming thunder shakes your windows and Eddie feels as though the storm has moved inside your home. You are no longer a kid, but right now you remind him too much of himself when he first went to live with Wayne, and so he keeps holding you until you pull away first.

"I really needed that, thank you," you smile up at him, but it doesn't reach your eyes. He takes it as a win anyways, because you haven’t smiled in a while and Eddie has always loved your smile.

"You can have as many hugs as you'd like, sweetheart. Why don't you go take a shower while I get your bed ready, huh? You can leave the door open if you want, I’ll be here."

You follow him into your hallway, eyes full of tears at his words. He might be the only person in the world that knows you better than you know yourself, and you don’t take that for granted. You take a hot shower and rub at your skin with your washcloth until it's raw and sensitive and cleansed, and when you come out wrapped in your fluffiest towel Eddie says nothing about the fact that when he walked into your bedroom, he could tell that you’d ripped your bed sheets off the mattress somewhere between a nervous fit and calling him in the middle of the night. There’s a new set, clean and smelling like your favorite fabric softener, and he’s laid out your most comfortable sleepwear at the end of your bed.

Eddie throws your used sheets into the washing machine and gets it started while you get changed, and when you're done you fish out a pair of his pajama pants and a shirt he left behind what feels like eons ago. He thanks you, almost surprised to see you have those clothes and it dawns on you that he doesn’t remember he gave them to you, because you haven't had one of the movie nights where he used to wear them in a while now. When you're both ready for bed, Eddie lifts your covers for you and tucks you in, laying next to you on top of the duvet.

"You can get in if you want," you say, and it's clear you want him to do it.

Eddie thinks he'll never be able to say no to you, so he gets in without you having to ask twice. You are quick to shift closer to him once he gets under the sheets and he takes the hint to put his arms around you, bringing your head to his shoulder and tangling his legs with yours. It’s been ages since he’s held you like this and he’s not going to start complaining about it now - not when you’re right back where you’ve always belonged.

"I have to move out by the end of the month," you mutter, starting to explain the night's events.

"That sucks. You’ve been house hunting yet?"

"No. I found out today and I was hoping Matt would help."

"And he didn't," Eddie says, knowingly.

"He didn't," you confirm. "I asked him to come over earlier because I was upset and he said he’d be here for dinner."

"You cooked?" he hums, petting the back of your head.

"Yeah. I made, uhm, lemon chicken? It wasn't very good."

You've always been a wonderful cook, at least in Eddie's eyes. You don't have a lot of recipes you can whip out from under your belt upon short notice, but the ones you do have are some of his favorites. The chocolate chip cookies he has to hide from Wayne, the chicken noodle soup you bring over when he’s sick, the banana pancakes that always went along with his scrambled eggs and bacon when he used to sleep over. You've never made lemon chicken for him, but you're good at following a cookbook so he thinks it mustn't have turned out inedible.

By now Eddie has learned that "it wasn't very good" means "Matt didn't like it". He doesn’t understand why that piece of shit is dating you if never likes anything you do. Hearing you repeat the things he says to make you feel bad makes your best friend want to dig through your fridge for the leftovers and eat them all just to prove to you that your boyfriend is wrong.

"I think I have to break up with Matt."

Your words make Eddie's head turn. Of all the things you could have said tonight, this was not something he ever imagined. He could have sworn you'd date Matt until he'd decided he'd had enough of you, or you'd marry him and he'd have to sit in the front row watching that fucking guy sap you of your life force for the rest of your days.

Eddie is haunted by the sound of your vacant voice when you'd asked him to come over. At the forefront of his mind he can see it all in loose pieces: the disarray in your bedroom, your obsession with being clean, Matt not being here after you said he’d come over earlier for dinner. He waits for you to paint a clear picture, hoping he won't have to break your boyfriend's nose (or worse) when he sees him around.

"Did he hurt you?" Eddie asks, heart sinking.

"I don't think he likes me anymore," you say, breaking down. Eddie shifts closer and holds you while you shiver. "He, um… he said I can't live with him if I can't find a place before I have to move out of here. A-and when I got upset because I don't want to be fucking homeless during my last semester, he- he tried to distract me with sex."

"What the fuck."

"I t-think he only came o-over ‘cause he wan- he wanted to get laid," you admit between hiccups. "And when he- he couldn't g-get it, he just left.”

"Sweetheart, fuck, I'm so sorry. He's such a fucking asshole," he lets you sob into his arms, the tears coming out of your tired eyes rivalring the downpour outside hitting your windows.

“He- he wouldn’t even hug me. I was crying and he just stood there! He doesn’t care about me being homeless, he- he doesn’t care about me at all!”

“Shh, it’s okay, you’re okay. I’ve got you, I’ve got you,” he says gently, and you want to believe he’s telling the truth but you don’t. You can’t.

“It’s not. It’s not okay,” you try to move away but he follows you, heart chasing after yours.

"What do you mean, baby?" he brushes a tear away from your face as you both sit up.

“I- I don’t know what’s wrong and I’m just… there’s nothing in here,” you say through your teeth while you grab at your shirt frantically, scaring him with the rough motion. "I feel so empty and I think- I know there's something really wrong with me, Eddie. Something has to be wrong. I’m not normal.”

"Hey, no, no, there's nothing wrong with you," he pulls you into him once more, not letting you run away from him again. "Sweetheart, I promise you, you're- you're not empty, what are you even saying? You're full - you're so full. You're full of love, a-and kindness, and if that son of a bitch is making you feel like you're not full then, I don’t know, dump his ass! He's mean and pathetic, please don't- don't break yourself into a million pieces for someone who doesn't deserve you."

"I don't feel full, Ed."

"That’s okay, we can work on it," Eddie says, confidently. "And I’m not gonna let you be homeless, I swear. You can move in with me until you feel ready to start house hunting!"

"What if I never feel better?"

"Then we’ll live together forever,” he says like it’s the most obvious thing in the world, and you know he means it.

"Ed-"

"Babe. I'm serious. One hundred percent. You can even have my bedroom, I don't care."

"And where are you gonna sleep, huh? Don't be stupid."

"Wayne slept in the living room for like a decade and he's still kicking, I'll survive."

You turn in his arms so you can look at him. Eddie looks back at you with his warm eyes and mischievous smile firmly planted on his face. He’s so special to you. And luckily for him, you've never been able to say no to him either.

"When is your lease over?" you ask, wiping your tears and feeling suddenly determined.

"Uh, after you graduate I think?"

"I’ll move in with you but don't renew it. Let's find a new place."

"Yeah?" Eddie grins. "You wanna be roommates? For real?"

"I think- I think it could be good for me," you raise your hands and squish his cheeks. I think you could be good for me. "I’ve missed this. I’ve missed you."

"Me too," he says, gaze softening.

He knows it's not your fault Matt has taken over your life, not when he's conditioned you for the past year to depend on him for everything. Eddie also knows he himself has been the source of many of your fights, and while it hurts to see you cry every time Matt gives you the silent treatment until you apologize for something you didn't do, your adamant refusal to cut your best friend off your life makes him incredibly proud of you.

As much as you've stood up for Eddie throughout your lives, you've never been good at standing up for yourself. He thinks it’s time he starts standing up for you too.

"You, um," Eddie starts, grabbing your wrists to pull your hands away from his cheeks and onto his lap. "You really are gonna break up with him though, right? Because I don't think I can pretend like everything's cool with the guy when he keeps hurting you like this."

"No, I know. I can't keep going like this anymore. There's... there's so much stuff you don't even know, Ed. Sometimes he really scares me," you confess.

"He hasn't, like… hit you or anything, right?" his throat constricts.

"No, but he says things... weird things. He's so mean sometimes,” you huff, finally getting rightfully angry. “He got mad for no reason the other day and said that the only time he felt I loved him was when he got sick and I stayed with him during Spring Break. I spent an entire week taking care of him and then when he gave me the fucking plague, because of course I got it from him, Robin had to take care of me because he was sooo busy."

"He's such a goddamn loser, he totally held you hostage ‘cause you had plans that didn’t involve him for once. I knew he had a problem with us going to Steve's cabin, he’s never liked any of us!”

"Also he says I humiliate him in class because I think I'm smarter than him. Like it’s my fault his grades suck.”

"You are, though," Eddie says, grinning.

“Huh?”

"You are smarter than him. You have always been the smartest of us all."

"No, I’m not,” you scoff. “Nancy was valedictorian."

"Be real, you didn't want that shit anyway."

"No, I really didn't," you giggle softly. "I was too busy running around town with you and Jonathan.”

“Those were the good days,” he snorts. “We totally made Hopper age in dog years.”

After the laughter ends, you two look at each other and know that something has changed tonight. Something that was slowly veering off track got violently course-corrected, and you let yourself feel hopeful for the first time in a very long time.

You’ll go to sleep in Eddie’s arms and wake up to the smell of him frying bacon. You’ll whip your banana pancakes from thin air and you’ll start deciding together what you want to sell, what you’ll put in storage and what you’ll take with you once you move out of your place. You’ll talk about your finals coming up and Eddie’s new job, and he’ll do the dishes while you call Nancy, who’ll call Jonathan, who’ll shake Argyle up, who’ll call Eden, who’ll call and wake up Robin, who’ll yell at a sleepy Steve to get up, who’ll then call you to ask when they should be coming to help you lug all your stuff into Eddie’s van.

And Matt won’t call all weekend, because he doesn’t care about you, but you will never know that because you’ll be getting drunk at Robin and Steve’s while Eden tells you about a two bedroom apartment that a classmate of hers is vacating after graduation, and everyone else will make bets on how long it’s going to take for you and Eddie to notice that you won’t actually need two bedrooms.

But for now, with eyes that hurt from crying and limbs that feel heavy with a tiredness you’ve been carrying for months, you feel a little less empty because you know that no matter what the future holds, you’ll always have Eddie by your side.

thank you for reading!

[hotluncheddie]

For the @steddie-spooktober day 19 prompt : zombie

rated: T | cw: none | tags: post s4, Eddie Munson has a crush on Steve Harrington, Steve is giving

📼📼📼📼

Eddie knocks on Steve’s door at exactly 7pm, precisely when he said he would.

Partly because he’s been looking forward to watching his favourite film again all week. And, well, mostly because he’s been looking forward to watching his favourite film alone with Steve all week. He set enough reminders and planned his day ahead so he’d be right on time.

Steve opens the door a few seconds later, soft and glowing in his glasses and yellow sweater.

Time alone with Steve is still something Eddie can’t really believe is real. Let alone when the guy listening to his rants and actually, genuinely seems interested in what he has to say.

‘Hey Ed’s.’ He says and Eddie bows slightly, presenting his prized VHS of ‘Night of the Living Dead’, the one he found in Indi months ago and hasn’t stopped being obsessed with since.

‘Come on in then.’ Steve smiles at Eddie’s seriousness, walks him towards the low cozy light of the den with a hand on his lower back. ‘I’ll just get us a soda.’ He says softly, leaving Eddie to put the movie in and sit with the tingles that are travelling up his spine.

‘So this movie is, like, a big deal then?’ Steve asks as he comes back in and sits down. Handing Eddie a coke.

‘It is a big deal! He reimagined and reinvented a whole genre of horror. It’s like, it’s actually culturally significant yeah?’ Eddie says, swinging his coke around and darting his eyes around the room.

He looks to his side. Steve staring at him with his head resting in his palm, little smile on his face. ‘Go on.’ He says.

‘So yeah.’ Eddie swallows and shifts, tugging at his shirt. ‘It was released in the 70’s along with some other movies like Pink Flamingos by John Waters and fuckin Eraserhead and Rocky Horror Picture Show dude. Seriously weird shit. And they travelled around and screened late at night. So basically only freaks and weirdos went to see them. But that was perfect because these movies were made by and for freaks and weirdos, you know?’ Eddie finishes, buzzing with excitement.

‘I know now.’ Steve says softly, still looking at Eddie with his little please smile.

Eddie blinks, feeling too hot under Steve’s gaze. ‘Yeah so, anyway, it’s super important that you watch this, I mean you work at Family Video and Halloween is next week. You gotta know the fundamentals Stevie.’

Steve nods and Eddie watches his hand as he presses play. They both relax back against the sofa, Steve scooting a little closer and putting his arm across the back cushions. Eddie tries not to act weird. Tries to focus on the movie, he loves this movie.

But he can feel the heat radiating off of Steve’s chest. Can hear his breathing and smell his cologne.

He can feel his horrendously huge crush for the guy banging at his rib cage, begging to be let free.

But, it really is his favourite movie, so it engrossed Eddie in the end, the thrill of the story unfolding in that little wooden house never gets old.

But then the soft flannel of Steve’s pyjama pants is pressing against Eddie’s jeans. And Steve’s warmth is getting closer, the arm on the sofa shifting to around Eddie’s shoulders. ‘I know you said it was a horror but, it’s kinda spookier than I expected.’ Steve whispers to Eddie in the near darkness. So close now he’s sure Steve must be able to feel the rapid beat of his heart.

Eddie almost pulls away. Too afraid by the potential, by the what if of it going all wrong, of everything he has with Steve falling apart in his fingers. But he’s seen Steve on a battlefield, he’s seen Steve by his bedside in hospital. He’s seen steve in so many ways, and each one is the bravest thing he’s ever known.

So, Eddie decides to be brave too, he leans in close and wraps a protective arm around Steve’s waist. ‘I got you.’ He says, serious. ‘Won’t let the zombies hurt you.’ And he watches Steve’s smile grow, teeth glinting in the light of the television.

Eddie’s cheeks are on fire. But there’s no place he’d rather be, as Steve settles with his head on Eddie’s shoulder. Eddie holds on for dear life.

‘Night of the living dead’ is definitely the best movie ever made.

📼📼📼📼

Tag list : @scoops-aboy86 @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @pearynice @marvel-ous-m @thecatkingsthrone

@cheesedoctor @chickensinrainboots @chameleonhair

[cyborgsara]

Buck and Tommy are endgame and Buddie is dead as a doornail. In this essay I will - (no but really there's an essay under the cut lol)

No one's gonna read this but here I go:

So I decided to take my shipper goggles off (mostly, I still love them sue me) and go back to watching as GA member, starting from s7. And it's certainly interesting to see things in different perspective.

Firstly Buck's storyline with Tommy was definitely tied to Eddie from the start. Yes he wanted Tommy and only Tommy but up until the Madney wedding I think they could have gone either way if they actually wanted to do Buddie. Like to me the bachelor party is the break off point. Tommy and Buck weren't that serious yet and if anything were to happen between Buck and Eddie it would have happened there I think.

There was the Buddie karaoke scene and a lot of things were cut from the episode and it also struck me as very odd the way Eddie was sassing Tommy at the bachelor party. I don't know how these things are filmed but in my mind since this was LFJ's "last" episode from his 4ep contract they could have gone the route of "Tommy was just the first and very passionate and fun but not a long term partner for Buck" so you know Tommy shows him the ropes and dips and that opens the door for Eddie to have his gay awakening and then Buddie becomes the canon ship. Add to this they could have done a storyline where something happened at the bachelor party that made Eddie question if his feelings were just platonic etc etc. (Eddie is also surprised Tommy is gay but doesn't seem to be surprised about Buck so that leads me to believe he knows Buck's been flirting with guys for a long time. The "go for the title" kitchen scene also reads to me as Buck is flirting with Eddie but Eddie is not reciprocating it and just kinda scoffs about it.)

None of that happened tho and looking back on in now, to me that seems like the cut off point for Buddie.

If we look at Bucktommy on the other hand they are living a romcom. We don't see a lot of them in s7 but after the wedding episode it's mentioned that they are still together and Buck seems the happiest he's been in a long time. We also get the stamp of approval from Bobby and a little teasing from Henren to show us that they are actually going pretty strong and the found family is glad about the relationship.

I also think Tommy was ready to try for a full relationship from the first date before it got ruined. After he realized Buck hasn't actually dated a man before he probably course corrected to try to be the best first male relationship for Buck and conditioned himself to not take it too seriously. But he hadn't met anyone like Buck before. He gained a perspective into who Buck is through their second chance coffee date and he was baffled by his speedrun through coming out and actually wanting him to go to a wedding where all his most important people will be attending. I personally think Tommy was extremely hesitant but also so awestruck by Buck that he just made sure Buck actually want's to go with him "are you absolutely sure", and when Buck said yes he thought fuck it I'll make the best of this for however long I have it. So he is content to just go along for the ride even when he doesn't think his relationship with Buck is that serious or that it has an expiration date.

So they have their cute little dinner dates and talk a little bit about their pasts but the tone is still very light and the conversations never really go that deep because one or both of them just want to bask in the happiness of the relationship.

But then Buck has a whole meltdown about his relationship that he doesn't even tell Tommy about and overcorrects with the moving in thing and that's when we gain the insight into Tommy. He is not just this cool pilot guy, he has a hell of a lot of baggage and is a runner, so that's what he does. Even though their breakup hurt like hell (which is partially to blame for all the shit that came afterwards) it was necessary for their story or relationship to have any kind of real merit compared to the other main couples.

Watching the last episode I was actually 70% sure we wouldn't see Tommy and that the "leaks" was another scam to make the bucktommy shippers look stupid for believing it. If I had only watched as GA before it aired I probably would have expected it more but that was the reason why I went back and watched the episodes for what they were. And that leads me to believe that Tommy and Buck are it for eachother. A lot fo things are still up in the air but their story is at such a delicious point right now where we just wanna know more! We know they both care about eachother (love confession around the corner???) we know about everything that Buck has gone through but we still have so much to learn about Tommy. I'm not at all concerned about Tommy's comment about him being Eddie's competition. No matter how he meant it, it's Buck's feelings about Eddie that really matter here. And he isn't pining for Eddie. He isn't in love with Eddie. Eddie is his brother and best friend. I'm very curious to see if they'll address Tommy's comment on tonights episode and what Eddie's take on it will be. But I'm not worried that either Buck or Eddie is pining for the other.

Ofcourse I can't say I'm 100% sure about them being endgame but from this point on people aren't gonna care about another potential relationship for Buck because; intentional or not Tommy is IT for Buck. You can't make a more perfect LI for him if you made them in a lab. And buddie isn't happening, that ship has sailed (see the reasons above and also RG doesn't want to do it). So from this point on if the creators want GA to care about Buck's romantic life in any capacity, it's Tommy or nothing.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk, peace out!

[sharkie-writes0]

Somewhere between the lines

Second part to “the one who got away”

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Lots of things could’ve happened today. Steve’s car could’ve broken down, a small earthquake could’ve hit, someone could’ve mugged him. But none of them, NONE of them, could’ve hit as hard as this.

“Hi Stevie” the man says, almost a whisper, a sheepish little wave thrown across the room.

Steve is stopped dead in his tracks, looking at the man he once knew and loved. The man he used to call every night to tell him about a crazy customer. Standing in front of him.

“Eddie…” he whispers, his voice barely carrying through the room.

His mind goes back to the last summer before he left. The conversation they had.

“Promise we’ll never grow apart” Eddie had said. And of course Steve promised, he’d promise anything to Eddie if it meant he would stay.

“Of course” Steve sighs, holding out his pinkie for Eddie to take. And as they link their pinkies together, Steve knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with this boy.

“Been a while hasn’t it” Eddie says, walking up to Steve with a smile, arms open wide, ready to hug.

Steve steps back, small tears beginning to well in his eyes. He looks Eddie up and down, as he can’t believe he’s actually here.

“I…I need a moment” Steve says, before rushing off to the staff room.

He slams the door, the walls shaking with the loud thud that probably was heard from outside the studio. A loud sob finally escapes his throat, and big tears flow down his face.

He scrambles for his phone, desperately wiping tears from his cheeks. Pressing robins contact, he moves to the couch and places his forehead on his knees, his shoulders shaking with sadness.

Robin picks up “hey I can’t talk long I- are you crying?”

“Robbie…” Steve sobs, “it’s…it’s him…it’s Eddie”

“What? What about Eddie? Steve what’s going on?” Robin says concerned

“He *hic* he’s part of the band I’m filming. He’s the lead. Bobbie I can’t do this” Steve says between his shaky breaths

“Oh god…Steve listen to me. You can do this. You can’t let him get to you again. So sit up! Take a deep breath, blow your nose, wipe your tears, and stand tall! Don’t let that asshole let you down again. Face him and get through this shoot. Then when you come home I’ll make you dinner and we can drink together okay?” Robin states. She always knew what to say, even if it sounded mean it was all in good faith.

“…okay” steve says reluctantly. They say their goodbyes and he hangs up. Taking a few deep breaths before following her instructions. He looks at himself in the mirror hanging off the wall. Nods to his reflection and walks out the door, and to his dissatisfaction, Eddie is there.

“Let’s start. You have your props?” Steve says sternly.

“Yes but-“ Eddie starts

“Good” Steve interrupts, walking past a worried looking Eddie.

Despite his effort, Eddie can’t get Steve to talk to him about something that isn’t related to filming. So eventually, he gives up.

Everyone starts to set up, the green screen behind the band and their instruments being put together. Steve lets them play a test round to get the audio settings all in order.

The bigger man, whos name is Garrett or so they all call him, stomps on the hi-hat pedal, settles the noise, and adjusts the cymbals to his liking.

After about twenty minutes or so, they start filming. Steve, who can’t seem to take his eyes off Eddie, moves the camera as they asked him to. Up, down, side to side, round and round and all that.

They finish filming the first scene for the day, and Steve lets out a sigh of relief. But he knows he has to be right back here tomorrow to film more of the video.

“Okay that’s it, I’ll see you all tomorrow.” Steve says quickly, wanting to get out of there as soon as possible. He wheels the camera back to the staff room, followed by Eddie, who is determined to have the one conversation Steve doesn’t want.

“Steve, please, talk to me” Eddie pleads softly

Steve angrily snaps around to face Eddie. “Oh you wanna talk? Okay let’s talk. Let’s talk about how you told me that we wouldn’t grow apart, let’s talk about how I had to wake up to a note from you telling me you were leaving. Let’s talk about how I sat in Robbie’s arms sobbing thinking it was MY fault you left. Let’s talk about that.” Steve shouts. Not caring if anyone else is hearing him.

Eddie sits there wide eyed, before taking a deep breath and speaking “look, I get you’re pissed at me. And rightfully so! I had no right leaving like that. And I regret the moment I stepped out that door every day. I am so unbelievably sorry Stevie”

“Don’t. Don’t call me that. You lost that privilege. We promised forever, and you broke that promise. And that hurt more than when I was being strangled by the vines” Steve whispers

Eddie looks down at his feet. “Okay Steve.” He says, pulling out a piece of paper “this is my number. Please, please text me” he says timidly and begins to walk out the door “oh and by the way… I never stopped loving you. Even after I left.” And with that, he shuts the door to the staff room.

Steve falls to the floor. Quiet sobs escaping his lips. He wants to forgive Eddie. He really does, but he’s too hurt right now.

That’s the man he loves, and has loved for years. And though he’s hurting, he won’t let him get away again.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Okay because I felt motivated here’s the second part. I might turn this into a series but I’m not sure

Once again constructive criticism and feedback is always welcome!

Love ya!

[anarcoqueer1994]

My Steddie T4T headcannon for the gender Euphoria.

Eddie moved to Hawkins right before his freshmen year to live with Wayne.

He is AFAB but when he moves he sees this as his chance to present how he wants, including binding and packing and dressing in masculine clothes. Wayne doesn't understand but he doesn't need to. He loves Eddie and whatever makes him happy. He even signed Eddie up for school under Edward Munson, not his dead name.

He passes for years and no one knows he is Trans except Gareth, Jeff, and Doug.

When he is attacked and almost dies during Springbreak, its Steve that carries him out of the Upside-Down.

Through the blood, no one else notices, but Steve accidentally sees through the torn up clothing that Eddie is not cisgendered.

Steve doesn't say anything because it's not important and not his (her) place to out Eddie. Steve just is focused 9n saving Eddie.

There is alot of damage to his torso including to his breast tissue. Eddie takes this as a silver lining basically opting to get it removed instead of reconstructing.

During the next few months Steve and Eddie get closer as they heal together. Steve never let's on that they know Eddie's secret bc Steve believes it's Eddie's choice to come out.

Meanwhile as this is all going down, Steve is have their own crisis.

For years, Steve has felt weird...off. Steve has always gravitated towards girls but not just because Steve is attracted to them...but because part of Steve was jealous.

Steve wants the soft curves, wants to be seen as pretty and delicate, loves feminine things...Steve wants to be a girl.

But Steve didn't think that was possible, so they leaned into their more traditionally masculine interests, it's not like Steve didn't like cars and sports.

But every once in a while, Steve let themselves wear pretty light lip gloss and soft perfume, always too subtle to notice.

But then Steve found out Eddie's secret and something clicked for in their head.

Steve knew Eddie was AFAB but that didn't change the fact that Eddie was a guy.

So maybe Steve wasn't a guy...maybe it didn't matter that the world decided they were a guy because of the parts they were born with.

Steve didn't have to want to be a girl because She was a girl.

And that thought brought comfort to her but still terrified her to come out. Everyone thought she was a guy, she didn't pass like Eddie.

So she took baby steps, told Robin first. Of course Robin was cool with it and when It was just the two of them in the Harrington mansion, she was able to wear some more feminine things she wanted to wear and felt gorgeous and happy.

As she and Eddie get closer, it becomes obvious they are more than friends. Eddie is the second person she tells. She figures he deserves to know if they are going out.

Of course Eddie doesn't care and finally tells her that he's Trans. Stevie reveals that she knew but didn't want to force him to come out.

It makes Eddie love Stevie more.

As years pass, Stevie eventually starts presenting more feminine in public and its hard but Eddie is by her side. Their friends now all know about both of them.

Steve loves pretty dresses and even early on when she didn't pass, none of her friends let her feel ashamed.

As time goes on they both start hormones.

In the 90s, Eddie surprises her by saving up secretly to pay for her to have top surgery as well.

They love each other so much.

And they both live happily ever after.

Edit: I removed a part bc even though I didnt intend to, there was an accidentally transphobic implication, and like being trans, I don't want to cause any harm to others in my community. Steve and Eddie are a straight couple in this h, there was no need to put quotes around straight.

@gayboysteve I genuinely appreciate your comment.

[bloodibambiidoll]

Purple Houses and Paranorman

(Single!Dad Eddie Munson x Single!Mom Reader)

Summary: Eddie asks you and Oliver to go to a special screening of Paranorman with him and Charlotte. WK: 3.9K

Series Masterlist My Masterlist

Warnings: Basically none, modern AU, mention of a dead family member (readers aunt), There’s like one second where Eddie is checking reader out and his thoughts get a little carried away, readers son has a speech delay, reader is implied to be alternative and have tattoos but I don’t talk about it much besides her outfits, fluff fluff and moreee fluff. But as always my blog is 18+MNDI

A/N: So I might have gotten a tiny bit carried away talking about the house, it wasn’t something I originally planned out but it kind of just came to me as I was writing, I’d like for them to all live there together eventually. I’m trying to make it a lil slow burn but I suck at that so hard so we will see how much longer I can go without making them kiss LOL. Also I said these were blurbs and this is almost 4K sooo Oopsie. As always my requests for these guys are open and feedback is greatly appreciated.💜💚

Your phone vibrated and the screen lit up, the contact reading “Eddie🎸🦇” you smiled to yourself before pushing the green accept button.

“Helloooo Edward, what can I do for you on this fine autumn morning?”

“Hey weirdo” He let out a laugh, one you’ve grown to find comfort in over these last few weeks. “What are you and Oli up to today? The theater is doing a special showing of Paranorman and I was wondering if you guys would wanna go with us later?”

“What’s in it for me?” You joked.

“Ummm you get to spend time with your bestfriend and do something Halloween related, which I know you love.”

“Bold of you to assume you’re my bestfriend.” You laughed, knowing he definitely had become the best friend you have but still wanting to fuck with him a little.

“Me? I’m talking about Charlotte, you are her new self proclaimed bestfriend and also you do her hair better than me, apparently. Can’t believe my own daughter likes you more than me.” He sighed dramatically and you could practically see him faux fainting.

“Awww I love her, she’s my new bestfriend too. Verdict is still out on her dad though.”

“WOW I can’t believe you would betray me like this, I thought you loved me.”

“Don’t worry, you’re better at playing monster than me apparently sooo I think we are even. What time do you want to go?”

“I guess we can call it even, for now. How about around two? Gives us a few hours to get the goblins fed and ready to go.”

Jokingly teasing each other had become the norm for you and Eddie, easily falling into flirty banter since the day you met.

“Okay, perfect.”

“Want to meet us there? Or I can come get you guys and we can ride together.”

Something you had noticed about Eddie is how perceptive he was. He picked up early on that you’d avoid going places you’d have to drive especially if you’d never been there before, which in those first few weeks was essentially everywhere. So he always offered to pick you and Oliver up whenever you all did something together.

“Could you pick us up? If that’s okay.”

“I wouldn’t have offered it if it wasn’t okay, babe.” Babe, was something he only started calling you recently but it made you giddy every time.

He was also constantly reassuring you that he didn’t mind helping you when you needed it. He knows how hard it is to do this alone so he was always offering to do anything to make things easier on you. Even if it was something as small as picking you and your son up for a movie. At first you declined his help every chance he offered, used to doing things alone, not wanting to burden him. But he’s told you over and over how he doesn’t mind, that it makes him happy to be able to help you.

So who could blame you if you had developed a not so small crush on him? You tried not to, but he was all kind gestures, big brown eyes and chunky jewelry. So how could you not? It’s not your fault it was like he was your dream come to life. You weren’t positive but you were pretty sure he felt the same. Hugs started lingering just a little longer than they should have, hands started brushing when you followed behind your rowdy children on evening walks, the cute little pet names he would always call you that made your stomach flip, the kisses on the cheek you had started giving each other.

So after you got Oli ready you gave him his tablet and spent a little extra time getting ready. You did your hair in your favorite style and added just a tiny bit more makeup than usual, both turned out perfect. But now you were standing in front of your open closet, staring at it like the perfect outfit was just going to jump out at you.

The October chill had set in throughout Hawkins, the days still sunny but the breeze cold, not quite bone chilling like in mid December, but cold enough that you needed some layers. You were also going to be sitting in a movie seat for two hours even if they were the reclining ones you didn’t want to spend that amount of time sitting in jeans.

After trying on several outfits, you ended up deciding on a black long sleeve skater dress, the neckline scooped just enough to make your boobs look nice. You layered some thigh high socks and leg warmers before pulling on your boots. You grabbed a plain zip-up just in case you got cold in the theater and gave yourself a once over in the mirror.

You couldn’t deny the fact that you looked good, and you hoped Eddie would think so too. He had never seen you this dolled up, usually wearing more comfortable clothes and simpler make-up.

You felt butterflies erupt in your stomach, a mixture of emotions going through you. Excitement to see Eddie was in the forefront, but the nervousness was lingering in the background. Are you reading things wrong? Is it smart to get involved with someone that your son has already started to form an attachment to? You took a deep breath, checking your hair one last time before shaking your head as if it would erase those feelings like an etch-a-sketch, willing yourself to enjoy something for once.

When you decided you were as ready as you’d ever be you got on Oliver’s shoes and jacket before grabbing your purse and taking him outside on the porch to wait on the swing. You smiled to yourself as you looked at the porch you spent many summers drinking lemonade with your aunt. The various wind chimes that hung moons and stars and zodiac symbols chime in the mid October breeze.

You loved this house, it belonged to your late aunt who left it to you in her will when she died. It was beautiful but eccentric, kind of like your aunt herself. It stuck out among the many suburban style houses in your neighborhood. It was a late 1800s Victorian style home, with beautiful arches and various types of windows, a wrap-around porch, and a beautiful backyard with a garden that your aunt cared for until the day she couldn’t anymore. You and Eddie had planted pumpkins back there with the kids in her honor, she’s the reason you love them so much after all. They were almost ready to be harvested and carved, a Halloween movie on in the background and the smell of pumpkin seeds baking in the oven.

But what really made the house stand out was that your aunt had it painted a deep purple color, the shutters and roof black, matching the porch. The door was black but it had a beautiful stained glass window in the middle of it, depicting the same kind of crescent moon and stars that dangled from the wind chimes. Inside there were four bedrooms, two bathrooms, a living and family room that held a mixture of her old and your new furniture, and your favorite part, the kitchen. It had been updated since the house was built, but still held a vintage feel. Your aunt had the cabinets and drawers all painted the same purple as the outside of the house, wallpaper with those same moons and stars adorned the walls. The only modern thing about it being the fact that she had replaced all the appliances with shiny new ones.

It was a lot of space, too much for just you and Oliver. But you couldn’t bring yourself to sell it, some of your happiest memories were spent here. So you decided you’d take this opportunity and get the fresh start you’ve been needing. You didn’t have much keeping you back home anyways. You and your mom weren’t particularly close but when she found out your aunt left you everything, not just the house, but her money too, she was furious.

Now that you’ve settled you know it was the right choice. Oli started school and despite his struggles with communication he was thriving in class, you got a job at a local diner where you made pretty decent tips, you had this beautiful house, and last but not least you had Eddie and Charlotte.

•

A large smile stretched across Eddie’s face when he turned down your long driveway and saw you and your son sitting on the porch. He loves your house, he used to drive by it when he would deal to the rich kids in highschool and always admired it. But when you stood up his jaw actually dropped. He had never seen you in a dress before, you always looked beautiful but right now you were fucking radiant.

He got out of his SUV to help you get Oliver’s seat in and you were even more breathtaking up close.

“Wow. You look… wow.” Eddie shamelessly lets his eyes wander your form for a moment, his cheeks turning red when he reaches that little sliver of skin between your socks and your dress.

“Thanks, babe. You’re not so bad yourself, I guess.” You repeated his words from earlier back to him and he cackled.

“Ha ha veeerry funny, brat.” He stuck his tongue out at you.

“Reaaaal mature, nerd.”

“Hi Eddie!” Oli ran over to hug Eddie’s legs and smiled triumphantly, having recently gotten his new friend's name down.

“Hey little dude! How’s a going?” He gave your son a wide smile while he affectionately ruffled his hair.

“Where Char?” He tilted his head to the side, more concerned with where his friend was than answering Eddie’s question.

“She’s in the car buddy, you wanna to say hi to her while I get your seat in?”

He just nodded, grabbing your hand and dragging you around to the other side of the car where Charlotte was, knowing he’s not supposed to walk down the driveway without holding hands.

Eddie couldn’t help but watch you walk away, internally groaning when he saw that same sliver of skin from the back. The dress is long enough to cover your ass, but not by much and he can’t help but imagine flipping the skirt of it up and-

“Eddie? Are you gonna put the seat in the car or are you just gonna stand there and ogle me?”

You couldn’t help but tease him when you turned around and he was just standing there holding the car seat with his mouth hanging open.

“Huh? Oh! Uh, yeah- yeah sorry.” His face turned beat red and he turned his back to put the seat in to try and hide it, but you saw it. At least you know he thinks you look cute, mission accomplished.

Once the kids were all buckled and ready to go you got in the passenger seat and flashed him a smile. He turned towards you and reached under your seat, his leather jacket covered arm going across your thighs where your dress rode up. You tried to act like your heart wasn’t beating a thousand miles a minute whenever you were this close to him, hopefully succeeding.

But Eddie caught the tiniest little squeak that came out of the back of your throat when he first touched you. Feeling satisfied with himself that he had any kind of affect on you because you made him feel like he was in highschool with a crush on a girl he didn’t have a chance with. But you were constantly showing him that maybe he did have a chance with you.

He pulled a bag from under your seat, plopping it in your lap.

“Me and the princess stopped at the dollar store and got your guys’ favorite candy. I figured since the movie theater candy is like crazy expensive we could get the candy before and get popcorn and drinks at the theater.” He said it so casually, like it wasn’t a big deal that he remembered you and your son’s favorite treats. But to you, it was. Every single time you saw him he gave you another reason to fall for him.

“Wow, thank you Eds. That’s really thoughtful of you.” You smiled at him sweetly, the kind of smile that made him feel like he was going to melt into a puddle in the driver's seat.

“Of course Darlin’ anything for my favorite dude and my favorite girl.” He smiled back at you, the kind of smile that reminds you of sunshine that you wanted to bottle up for a rainy day.

He put the car in reverse and of course he had to put his hand on the headrest of the passenger seat while he pulled out. You just wanted to tilt your head up and kiss his wrist where his jacket rode up. You wanted to be close to him so badly, you’ve been trying to find the courage to ask him to hang out, just the two of you but you keep psyching yourself out. You didn’t have anyone to watch Oli anyways and if he wanted that he never hinted at it. Always suggesting things for you to do with the kids. Which you love, having someone think of both of you the way Eddie does is something you’ve never really had. But what you wouldn’t give for just a few hours alone with him, no kids, just being yourselves. But maybe he didn’t want that?

Eddie glanced over at you as he turned onto your street, you were staring out the window, chewing your lip that way you always did when you were thinking hard about something. Usually something that was upsetting you, so he did what any good friend would do and reached across the center counsel to grab your hand.

You whipped your head around at the feeling of his larger hand engulfing yours.

“You okay?” He ran his thumb over the top of it before intertwining your fingers. He had never held your hand before, and you felt your insides grow warm at the feeling. His palm was surprisingly soft against yours, but his fingers were calloused from years of playing guitar and working on cars. The juxtaposition of rough and smooth was more soothing than you ever could’ve imagined.

“Yeah, I’m okay. Just got lost in thought for a second. Thank you for checking on me.”

You smiled at him sweetly, squeezing his hand in yours. Expecting him to let go after he knew you were alright but he just held on tighter. One hand on the wheel, the other in yours, hidden from the kids by the center console.

“DADDYYYYY! I want an icee, a blue oneeee!” Charlotte said in a sing-song voice.

“Okay baby, we can get a blue icee.” Eddie smiled at her in the rearview mirror and she clapped her hands in triumph.

“Oli, do you want an icee?” His eyes moved over to the other side of the backseat as he addressed your son.

“Yuuppp! Blueeee!” He said in the same sing song tone as his friend. He was always parroting her and saying things she said back to her and it warms your heart. He’s come so far with his communication skills since he started school and started spending so much time with Charlotte, you couldn’t be more proud of him.

Eddie held your hand up until he parked the car and took the keys out of the ignition. Squeezing it before placing a quick and sneaky kiss on the back of your hand, giving you one of those goofy smiles you love so much and exiting the car like he didn’t just make a bomb filled with butterflies go off in your stomach.

You got the kids out of their seats and walked into the movie theater, Charlotte and Oliver insisting on being in the middle so they could hold hands too. Eddie showed the guy at the ticket booth the barcode on his phone that had the tickets on it since he insisted on paying for everyone.

“Icee! Icee! Blue!” Oli jumped up and down as he pointed at the machine spinning the different colored slushy ice.

“Yeah baby, I’m gonna get you an Icee.” You chuckled at how cute his excitement was, letting him drag you toward the concession stand with Eddie and Charlotte in tow.

You ordered two small and two large blue Icees and a large popcorn. You go to pull your wallet out of your purse to pay since Eddie bought the tickets but you feel a large hand on yours, pushing it back down.

He already had his card out before you even open your purse, handing it to the woman behind the counter.

“Eddie… you paid for the tickets, it's the least I can do.”

“Nope. My treat.” A triumphant smile spread across his lips and he sent you a wink.

He always did this, paid for you, drove you, brought you little things he saw in the store that reminded him of you or Oli. It’s not like you didn’t have money, your aunt left you plenty of it and you had your job at the diner. But you knew Eddie did well for himself, he had told you some about his childhood, how he grew up with very little and he didn’t want his daughter to ever feel like he did as a kid. So after he finally graduated he and his uncle opened their own mechanic shop. It was fairly successful, their lower prices and more efficient work times drawing in and catering to the less wealthy people of Hawkins.

“Dada I have to go potty!” Charlotte tugged on Eddie’s hand, pouting toward the bathroom sign that was on the way to your designated theater.

“Alright sweets, let’s go potty. Oli and your bestie will go get our seats.”

She shook her head and pouted, looking at you with big round brown eyes, asking without verbalizing, something you’ve became an expert at understanding after having Oliver. Ever since you had all started going on outings together more often she had been asking you to take her to the bathroom. She had hardly ever gone in the girls room, always having to have her dad take her, so after you took her that first time, she always asked.

“Do you want me to take you potty honey?” You smiled at her sweetly, titling your head toward the bathroom.

“Yes! Please! I like going to the girl potty room!”

“Alright little dude, looks like it’s you and me with the snacks and the seats. They have lady business to attend to.” He grabbed the drink carrier from your hand, guiding Oli to walk in front of him into the bright colored double doors that led to dimly lit theater.

You stood outside the stall while Charlotte used the restroom, “standing guard” as she called it.

“Have you ever seen Paranorman before?” You asked her as you helped her wash her hands.

“No but my daddy said it’s a lot like Coraline and I love Coraline so I hope I will like this one too!” She smiled at you in the mirror.

“I’m sure you will, Oli loves it!” You helped her dry her hands before leading her out of the bathroom and into the theater to find the boys.

“Mommmmyyyy! Sit!” Oliver patted the seat on his left, signaling for you to sit down next to him. Charlotte sat to his right and to her right sat Eddie.

You knew you wouldn’t be able to sit by him before you even got here. But he felt like he was a world away with two reclining seats between you, it made you miss the old movie seats, at least then you’d be close enough to reach behind the kids to hold his hand over their heads. You missed his hand in yours the minute he let go, it still felt empty now even as you held the large cup filled with sugary blue slush in your hand.

The movie went as smoothly as it could’ve with two five year olds. You had to shush them both more than a few times and twenty minutes in, Oliver had to go to the bathroom, Eddie took him, he liked going in the boys bathroom just as much as Char liked going in the girls.

When it ended you corralled the kids back into the car, Eddie offering to drive through McDonald’s on the way to your house to get the kids happy meals and they cheered.

The ride was filled with small talk, jokes, and all four of you singing along to different songs on your playlist because Eddie even let you pick the music in his car. He never let anyone pick the music, it didn’t hurt that you had good taste.

When you were a few minutes from your house, just like before Eddie reached over to grab your hand. You took it instantly, intertwining your fingers and looking over at him with a shy smile.

“I had a lot of fun today, thanks for coming with us.” He glanced over at you at a stop sign, his smile sweet and his eyes filled with affection.

“I did too, thank you for inviting us. Next time I’m paying though.” You ran your thumb along his, the soft gesture contradicting the teasing tone in your voice.

“Yeah, we will see about that sweetheart.” He sent you a wink as he turned onto your street, giving your hand one last squeeze before getting out of the car to help you with the seat.

He got Oliver and his seat out of his car, you grabbed your son's hand and he held onto the car seat as he walked you a few feet to your door. He sits the seat down on the porch before turning to Oli and asking him for a high five, he happily obliged, even offering to bump knuckles with him in return.

“I really did have fun today, I love hanging out with you guys, it’s nice… to have someone else to do things with.” Eddie rocked on the balls of his feet with a bashful look on his face.

“It is nice, I’m glad we have you guys. I love spending time with you, both of you.” You were sure the smile on your face was lovesick and dopey but you couldn’t bring it in yourself to care. “The pumpkins are almost ready to harvest, would you guys want to come over and carve them next weekend? We can put a Halloween movie on, make some popcorn, make a whole thing of it.”

“I’d love that, and I’m sure she would too. It’s a date.” His eyes widen as he realizes his choice of words and you can tell he's about to correct himself so you cut him off.

“It’s a date.” You nod, wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him into a hug that he immediately reciprocates, his arms wrapping tightly around your waist, his chin resting on the top of your head. You give him a final squeeze before pulling away and placing a gentle kiss on his cheek.

“Goodnight Eddie, get home safe.”

He was beat red with a flustered look on his face, you had kissed him on the cheek a few times now, but something about this felt different, more intimate.

“Goodnight sweetheart, sleep tight little dude!!” He waved at Oli before giving your forearm a squeeze and walking back towards his car. You sigh as you watch him drive away, knowing you’ll be counting down the days until next weekend.

Taglist: @comic-harley @yujyujj @witchwolflea @ali-r3n @bmunson86 @ineedtosusoutmyreadinglist @sheneedsrocknroll92 @melodymunson

[lostintheuniverseslies]

In the Wake of You

My creativity has been blocked for far too long and its frustrating. So I hope sharing my WIP might help this block I'm in. I started writing this after 8x5 (I believe) but it'll be canon up to 8x8. So focus on Buck/Tommy Break-up but going to ignore the whole Sublet/Eddie is an asshole thing in episode 8x9(?). With that being said, please read the Trigger Warnings as this deals with dark themes. Heavy on the Hurt. Comfort eventually. TW: This contains mentions and flashbacks of a hate crime due to homophobia, self-destructive/self-harm tendencies, wishing to be dead, mentions of putting oneself in a non-con situation, and deep depression.

Part 1: The Spiral word count: 4100

I don't know what I'm ready for but I am ready for something. And I think maybe that something could be with you.

Buck wanted to laugh at his past self and the absurdity of all the things he said to Tommy. He wanted to shake that version of himself and say, Don't bother. It won't matter. What was the point of Buck 1.0, 2.0, and 3.0 if he always ended up where he started?

Back to meaningless hookups and reckless choices on the job.

He wasn’t proud of either, especially the latter. But here he was, thirty-three and repeating the same mistakes he made at twenty-six. Before Abby.

Before she gave him a taste of what a relationship could be, before he understand what he wanted. Before everyone else around him had found love—or were already living in it—and he was still searching.

None of it mattered now. Some people got their happy endings. Some didn’t. And it had become clear which group he fell into. So, he filled the void with his body before it aged out of usefulness. Drank more than ever. Called in sick when the hangovers hit too hard.

Everyone was worried, he knew that but he couldn’t cope. Christopher left, Tommy broke up with him, Eddie left too. Maddie and Chimney were having another baby. Athena and Bobby were building a new house together. Hen and Karen were focused on Denny and Mara.

There wasn’t space for him. No one had room. And it would be selfish to ask them to make some. To ask them to care. To say, I feel alone. It wasn’t their responsibility. It never had been. And with every poor decision, he wondered what the point was. The deeper he spiraled, the more detached he became.

Most assumed it was just the breakup. That it all boiled down to Tommy. And while that was part of it, it belittled the rest. Yes, he loved Tommy. Yes, it still hurt. But this was more. A lifetime more. It began the moment his parents brought him into the world. 

He failed at the only thing he was born to do, to save his brother. And from that moment on, he fought to be seen, to be loved, but never understood why he had to fight so hard. They loved Maddie. Why not him?

That question haunted every stage of his life. When Abby came along, he thought, So this is what everyone means. It wasn’t easy. He was still growing, still figuring himself out. But he believed if he tried hard enough, he could be good enough for her. But then she left, never came back, and never told him why. 

With Ali, he moved slower. It worked—until it didn’t. She couldn’t be with a firefighter. The job gave his life meaning. It was the only reason he got out of bed.

Taylor was a mess of contradictions. Good and bad. She left too, prioritizing her career. He couldn’t blame her. Everyone chose something else over him. He got it. He was too much and not enough, too broken, too emotional. 

Natalia barely left a mark. A brief attempt at connection during his shiny second-chance at life haze. But all she wanted was the story of his death, not the reality of his life.

Then came Tommy.

And everything changed. Not because Tommy was man but because he raised the bar Buck didn't know he'd set so low. Tommy saw him. Called him Evan in a way that made him feel known, wanted. They worked in the same field so they understood the job. Tommy was gentle. Caring. Passionate. He was everything Buck had ever wanted and more. Tommy was the one. 

Which made the end all the more crushing. Six months in, Buck had been falling in love and dreaming of forever while Tommy apparently saw it as temporary. A stepping stone for Buck, as nothing more than fun.

And really, Buck should have known better. Should've known no one would want to settle down with him. Least of all someone as great as Tommy.

But what was the point of dating if the end goal wasn’t the same? Why hadn’t they talked about it before Buck fell too deep? 

He knew why though… Because he dove into things without thinking and should have asked the important questions out loud. But he didn’t. He thought they were on the same page when every free moment they had, they found a way to spend it together. Tommy was gentle with him and caring and loving and Buck thought that meant something. But he was naive. 

So.

Fucking.

Naive. 

The breakup hurt but he still had Eddie and felt hopeful that Christopher would come home soon.

Then Eddie dropped the final blow.

He was moving too.

Everything unraveled from there.

Buck kept it together just long enough to help Eddie pack. Then he collapsed. Spiraled. Let strangers take him home. Let alcohol carry him through. Because what else was he good for? No one wanted him. They wanted what he could give.

They wanted a warm body. They wanted strong arms and a big frame. And he gave it to them. He didn’t tell them his name, what he did for a living, or shared any detail other than his boundaries for sex. Condoms were a must and they were not allowed to go back to his place. 

A wheezing breath snapped him back. The pavement beneath him was cold and rough. His body throbbed.

Then he remembered being in the bar and hitting on a woman who had a boyfriend. In his defense, he didn’t know that as the man was off playing pool with his friend. 

When the boyfriend and friend approached Buck to tell him off, apparently telling them he swung both ways wasn’t ideal as the boyfriend was more angry about Buck being “gay” (he politely corrected him saying he was bisexual) than about hitting on his girlfriend. The boyfriend and best friend dragged Buck out of the bar and out behind the building. Buck was too drunk to care, too emotionally drained to be scared, and too far off mentally to grasp the seriousness of the situation. 

He must have blacked out. He couldn’t really remember. But the men were gone and Buck was on the ground, struggling to breathe. He wondered if he’d be found. Between one blink and the next he was out again.

“Sir? Can you hear me?” Someone said, shining a penlight into his eyes. Buck flinched and tried to pull away but the paramedic laid a hand on his shoulder. “Easy there,” she said. “Can you tell me your name?” 

He blinked up at the dark sky, red and white lights flashing in his periphery. A backboard landed beside him. He felt disoriented.

“Buck,” he rasped. Blook coated his mouth. He shut down the emoblism memory before it swallowed him.

“Can you tell me what happened?” 

He huffed a little too hard. Pain lanced his ribs. “I don't think they liked the fact I'm bisexual.”

The paramedic frowned. “This was a hate crime?” 

Buck's brow furrowed. No. It wasn’t a hate crime, was it?

He didn’t know. He couldn’t think clearly. He tried to answer but his eyes slipped shut again.

The next thing he registered was light. Blinding and fluorescent. A pounding in his skull. Every pulse of pain a reminder that he was still alive. A reminder he wasn't too sure he cared to have at the moment.

Beeping machines. Murmured voices. The sterile sting of antiseptic. Blood on his tongue. His mouth dry, his lips cracked. His ribs throbbed every time he took a breath, a dull, punishing ache radiated through his chest. 

Someone called his name.

“Mr. Buckley?”

Opening his eyes took effort. The world blurred, then slowly came into focus. A figure shifted beside him, resolving into a nurse in blue scrubs when his vision cleared. 

“Hey there,” she said, her voice gentle but firm. “You had us a little worried.” 

He blinked, trying to absorb where he was. IV in his arm. Scratchy blanket. Pain everywhere.

Something happened. Something bad.

He struggled to sit up but the second he moved, pain flared up in his ribs, sharp and immediate. He gritted his teeth and forced himself to stay still, eyes flicking to the nurse.

“What…?” His throat was dry, words coming out hoarse. He cleared his throat and tried again. “What happened?”

The nurse’s expression was calm but assessing. “You were brought in by an ambulance after an altercation outside a bar,” she said, flipping through his chart. “You lost consciousness. Regained it briefly, then passed out again. Mild concussion. Split eyebrow, busted lip, deep facial bruising. No broken bones. Sprained wrist, bruised ribs, abrasions on your hands and arms.” She looked up. “You’re lucky.”

Right.

It came back in disjoined flashes—the man’s anger, the sneer on his friend’s face, hands that grabbed him, the first punch landing hard enough to make his teeth clack together. Then the ground, the cold of the pavement against his skin. The way they kicked him, used his hair to drag him up so they could knock him back down. The fear that spiked when he realized they weren’t going to stop. 

Buck swallowed and pushed it all down. It didn’t matter now. Nothing mattered but getting out of here.

“Where’s my phone?” He asked, throat still rough. 

The nurse narrowed her eyes slightly as if she couldn’t believe he didn’t have anything to say about his injuries. 

“They couldn’t find it,” she said. “Likely taken. Same with your wallet. They left your ID.”

He felt hallow.

“Do you want us to call someone?” She asked.

He didn’t have anyone listed as his emergency contact. After the last hospital visit, he kept that placeholder blank as he didn’t want to burden anyone in his life. He figured—hoped—he’d have a partner the next time he was hospitalized. 

Buck scoffed at the notion and it elicited a painful groan.

“No,” he said. He didn’t want to hear Maddie’s worried voice. Didn’t want Bobby’s disappointment or Chimney’s concern. Eddie's—Eddie wasn’t even here anymore. 

Buck shifted, wincing when his ribs protested. Rubbed a shaky hand over his face and regretted it immeditlay. Everything hurt.

He was so exhausted. Mentally, physically, emotionally. 

“I’m fine,” he muttered. “I just want to go home.” 

“Mr. Buckley, I can’t advise—”

“It’s okay,” he said, flashing her a hollow smile. “I’m a firefighter. I know what I’m doing.”

“I have—”

“Please,” he said. “I want to go home.” 

She looked resigned and waited a moment, as if staring him down would get him to change his mind. It didn’t and soon she pulled the curtain back and went to the nurses station to retrieve the discharge form. 

While she did that Buck yanked out the IV, off the pulse oximeter, ECG leads, and the blood pressure cuff. It felt overdone and unnecessary. He was fine. 

He pulled out the IV, the monitors. Threw off the blanket. Pain made the room spin but he powered through. Braced himself on the bed until it stopped.

By the time she returned, he was upright, barely.

“Sign at the bottom,” she said. “I need to legally inform you that checking yourself out against medical advice isn’t recommended, given your condition. You may experience dizziness, nausea, or confusion due to the concussion. If you start feeling worse, you need to come back.” 

Buck nodded noncommittally as he scrawled his signature across the line then handed the clipboard back. She stood there, watching him for a moment, and then walked away. 

He psyched himself up as he pushed up onto unsteady feet. The moment he was vertical, his head spun, and he had to grab onto the bed rail, breathing slow until it passed. He could feel the eyes of the nurse on him from the nurses station but she didn’t say anything. 

The walk was slow but eventually he left the ER, the cold night air hitting him hard as he stumbled over out of the way to lean against the wall. He was already so fucking tired and in pain, he didn’t know what to do next.

“Evan?”

A familiar voice cut through the night. 

Buck’s stomach dropped. 

He lifted his head slowly and found Tommy on the tail end of one of the guys from harbor station who had a balloon and teddy bear that said “it’s a boy!”.  Huh, Buck thought, congrats to them. He wondered how much time had passed if she was already having the baby. Then he wondered if he even knew what month it was. 

He only had a second before he could shut down his expression and use the same shield he’d been doing since Tommy ended things. The co-worker stared between Tommy and Buck, halfway inside the hospital. When Tommy gave him a nod, he disappeared inside. 

“Hey,” Buck said with a smile, pushing himself away from the wall, feigning nonchalance or maybe arrogance, he wasn't sure. “Actually, I go by Buck.”

Tommy’s eyes narrowed as if he didn’t remember how he left. How he said “see you around Buck”, not Evan. Just Buck.

Because Tommy wasn’t in love with him like he was in love with Tommy. So of course Tommy didn’t remember calling him Buck. He was probably already in a relationship with someone else. Maybe someone closer to his age. Someone who didn’t have baggage. Someone who understood the job but didn’t work it so they never had to fight for time together. Someone who could say Tommy wasn’t their first but he was their last. 

It caused something like acid to fill his stomach. Tommy’s eyes roamed over Buck’s body, taken in the state of his clothes. A dirtied hoodie and pants, his white shoes he usually kept crisp but now were dirtied and stained. And finally, the injuries. Buck didn't know what his face looked like but by Tommy's expression, it wasn't good.

“Are you okay?” Tommy asked tentatively, taking a step forward.

Buck took one back, not wanting the space between them to lessen because if it did, he might break and he did not want to break in front of Tommy. 

“Peachy,” Buck said with a forced smile. “You should probably get in there and see the baby. I got somewhere to be.” 

He took a step forward, wincing a bit as it pulled at the bruises under his clothes. He didn’t know where he was going but he figured there was a bar nearby. Maybe he could have someone take pity on him and buy him a drink. 

“Wait,” Tommy said, easily blocking Buck’s path as he hadn’t made it far. “Where are you going?”

Buck shrugged. “I need a drink and maybe guilt someone into taking me home with them.” The last part was mostly a jab at Tommy, a half assed attempt to hurt him but the effort was futile because Buck knew Tommy didn’t love him. 

“Evan—”

“Don’t,” Buck said angrily. “You don’t get to call me that.”

He tried to step around Tommy but was stopped.

“Listen to me—”

“Why?” 

“Because you’re hurt.”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re not.”

“What the hell do you know?” He exclaimed, startling Tommy who’d never seen him so angry. “I’m an adult. I know what the fuck I’m doing. And what I’m doing is going to a bar and finding someone to hook up with because that is all I’m good for.”

Buck brushed past, refusing to care about Tommy's wounded look because fuck him and also because if Buck stopped being angry, he’d fold. It angered him that Tommy acted like he cared. He didn’t have the right to care after breaking it off.

Fuck that. Fuck the bullshit line “I’m your first not your last”. Buck was thirty-three for crying out loud. He was a grown ass adult. He knew what he wanted. And what he wanted was Tommy. And what he got was heartbreak.

“Evan—”

“Talk to someone who cares cause it's not me,” Buck called back. 

“No one’s going to hook up with you looking like that,” Tommy said, voice cold.

Buck shrugged but kept walking. “I’m sure someone will take pity on me. Plenty of deplorable people out there who would see me as an easy target. I just needed to get drunk enough to not fight it.” 

He didn’t know why he said that. It was a horrible thing to say or even think of doing. He didn’t want that to happen. But some part of him wondered if it would be so bad. If he should let people take and take and take from him until he had nothing left to give. Until he was a hollow husk. 

Tommy was there in front of him again, eyes blazing with anger. “You’re not going to some bar. You’re going home.”

“Sure. I will tomorrow.”

He moved to push past Tommy but firm hands landed on his shoulders, holding him in place and Buck could feel the fight draining from him.

“I’ll take you to Eddie’s,” Tommy said. “Make sure you’re taken care of.”

Buck snorted but the fight was completley gone at the mention of Eddie. A stark reminder that Buck had no one. “Good luck with that.”

“Evan—” 

“I told you to stop calling me that.”

“Okay. Fine. Buck.” It sounded more like vitriol than not but he couldn’t bring himself to care how Tommy addressed him. Not when he felt like everything was crumbling down. The carefully placed walls since Eddie left were disintegrating at a faster rate than Buck could put them back up. 

He didn't want to be in Tommy's vicinity for a reason. It was too hard to pretend he was okay. Everyone else may believe the facade but Tommy never did.

“I’m going to take you to Eddie’s and—”

“Can’t take me to Eddie’s unless you’re planning a trip to El Paso.”

“What?” Tommy asked, confused. 

And just like that, the walls came down.

Tears burned his eyes and he was powerless to stop the flood of emotions that came surging to the top. Emotions he'd worked hard to keep bottled up ever since Tommy walked out that door.

Buck's body shook as his anger melted and the reality of what happened tonight came to the surface. He tried to push it down. He didn't want to think about it, wanted to be aloof and unattached because it wasn't a big deal.

But Buck had been attacked.

Not because he flirted with a taken woman but because he was bisexual. Could he even say he was attacked if he didn’t necessarily care at the moment it happened? 

His mind was too fragmented so he focused on the only truth he knew. The one that had been true his entire life and would continue to be true until he was old and gray.

“Everyone leaves,” Buck choked. “My parents weren’t present during my childhood so they basically left the moment I was born. Or maybe the moment Daniel died. I don’t know. Maddie left for Doug. Abby left to find herself and found a whole fiance who I saved from the trail derailment a few years ago, by the way. I even got an invitation to their wedding because why not?”

It was a punch to the gut, really. Yes, he was happy for Abby but the whole thing left a sour taste in his mouth.

“Then there was Ally who left once I got out of the hospital after a ladder truck landed on my leg and got married a few years later. And Maddie left again at some point. Chimney left with Jee-Yun to find Maddie. Then Eddie left the job. Taylor betrayed me. The coma dream—it had put things in perspective, you know? That I meant something to people. That I was important too but that was short lived. I have no purpose. I thought dating a death guru would help but that fizzled out so badly when I didn’t want to talk about my death anymore. Then you came into my life and—”

Buck choked on the words as tears ran down his face. The gates were opened and Buck couldn’t stop them. Meeting Tommy and falling in love with him was transformative. Not because Tommy’s a man but because Tommy was everything he needed in a relationship. Everything he wanted. He saw a real future with him and then it all blew up in his face.

“I wasn’t enough for you and you left. Christopher left. Eddie left. Hen and Karen are always busy. Athena and Bobby are focused on rebuilding their house. Maddie and Chimney's family is growing. And then there’s me.” Buck wiped at his face then winced because he forgot about his injuries. He felt pathetic, standing here in front of Tommy, losing his shit. “I wish I died in that coma.” 

He’d never said the words out loud. Never gave room to them in his mind. But now, with it out in the open, he realized it was true. Somewhere along the way he lost the shiny second-chance at life feeling. Somewhere he reverted back to that person who was lost and alone. 

“Evan, you don’t—”

“I do,” Buck said, though his voice sounded distant. He felt distant. Like he wasn’t fully in his body anymore. Like those words freed him. Maybe they did. Maybe accepting the truth would free him from this pain.

“I wasn’t born from love, Tommy. I was born with a purpose to save. To be of service. When I couldn’t do that right, Daniel died. The world has been punishing me ever since. Making sure I stayed in service and bore all the pain. The ladder truck on me instead of someone else who might have died or lost their leg. The embolism because I dared to want to come back to a job that made me happy. The fucking Tsunami because I needed to be there and save people despite what it did to me. To save Christopher. The lightning strike so that Maddie didn’t lose Chimney. I’m tired,” he said, his voice cracking. “I’m so fucking tired. I push and push and push. And I search for my great love. I search for my happy ending. I was told that you don’t find it but you make it. And I tried that with you. We were building toward something great. I thought we were. But you left! Y-you didn’t want me. And I shouldn’t be surprised.” Buck let out a self-deprecating laugh. “There is something fundamentally wrong with me. I was never supposed to exist and the world has made sure I knew that.” 

Tommy's eyes were glassy with tears that Buck didn't understand.

His brain was beginning to feel hazy as they stared at each other. Buck retreated into himself. Disappeared into a place that didn’t require him to be anything.

There was nothing else for him to say. To do. All the energy bled from him. All the emotions he'd harbored, pulsed slowly until they weren't there anymore.

He felt empty. Hallow. A husk.

Tommy didn't say anything. Didn't push for Buck to explain or to even do anything. Maybe Tommy could see that Buck had nothing left to give.

So, Tommy guided Buck through the parking lot and to a familiar truck. Buck didn’t even argue as he was helped inside and buckled up. He stared out into nothing as the truck engine came to life and Tommy pulled them onto the highway. 

The cab was quiet and Buck didn't mind because for once in his life, he didn't feel anything.

When the truck parked, Buck saw they were at Tommy's but didn't care to protest or even fight as Tommy helped him out of the truck and inside. He was guided to the bathroom and told to shower. Buck did. Staring into nothing. Numb despite the pain in his body. He dressed in the hoodie and sweatpants Tommy provided and let Tommy guide him over to the couch where a pillow and blanket were. 

Tommy said something and Buck nodded even though he didn’t hear what was said. Soon he was lying down on the couch in a dark room covered by a warm blanket that smelled like Tommy. He closed his eyes and wondered what the point would be if he woke up the next morning.  

[cheese-sandwich30]

The Study of a Hug

Fandom: 9-1-1

Pairing: Buck x Eddie

Genre: Angst-ish

Warnings: None

Word count: 1034

Summary: Eddie has a long road ahead. He can't help but think about the meaning of home as he drives back to Texas.

A/N: I'm trying to to @whumpril this month. I also have a lot of things to do this month, so if I can do at least half the prompts, I will be happy

AO3 link

Eddie had been driving for a few hours now. He wouldn’t be home in at least another ten. Home was a weird word to describe where he was going. He was going back to Texas, to his parents, to his new house and, most importantly, to Christopher. However, even if he wanted to believe he was going home, he just didn’t feel like it. If he truly was going home, why did he feel like he was leaving half of his heart behind?

His mind lingered to that feeling, that emptiness, that he had felt ever since he had gotten inside the car. Ever since he had last seen Buck through the rear-view mirror. He looked at the cookies he had made him for a second. Both of them had barely time to sleep that day and, instead of resting, he had decided to bake some cookies for him. He couldn’t think of anyone else in his life who would do that for him. 

Thinking back on it, Buck was truly his only constant in his life for the past few years, aside from Christopher. He had seen his highs and his lows, and had been there to, metaphorically and physically, hold his hand through all the hardships he had endured. He couldn’t imagine his life without Buck.

This wasn’t the first time he had that thought. There had been multiple instances in their precarious lives in which Eddie had tried to imagine a life without Evan Buckley in it and had failed to do so in order to avoid a panic attack. Not even when either of them had been close to death, which was more often than what they would like to, he had entertained the thought. They hadn’t talked about it, but he was sure Buck felt the same way. There weren’t many memories of the time he had been shot, but he knew Buck had carried his body out of danger as best as he could, and you don’t do that for someone you believe is dead. And believe him, he had been really close to dying.

The thing was, Buck and him didn’t really need to speak in order to understand each other, at least not always. After the first few weeks, they had formed and bond so tight, that they tended to be regarded as one. Suddenly, Buck was invited to dinner with him and Chris, and Buck became the babysitter, to the point of Eddie leaving him as Christopher’s legal guardian if something were to happen to him. Their captain referred to them as one, always “Eddie and Buck” or “Buck and Eddie”, almost never on their own. 

Eddie hadn’t really thought too much about this, but now he had time to spare and the cookies sitting in the passenger seat and he couldn’t stop thinking about all those little details that before had been too obvious to even regard, too little on their own to be able to see a bigger picture.

His mind continued to wander, now to their last moments before he left.

The hug.

He hadn’t wanted to let go, not really. The moment Buck’s arms had been around him, he had felt a sense of calmness that he hadn’t felt in a long time. That was the Buck effect: he always made him feel safe. He tried to remember every single instant of that hug, engraving it into his memory. How Buck’s tank top had felt against his skin, the way he smelled, how his strong arms were pressed against him, squeezing just enough to ground him, but not hard enough to overwhelm him. 

Eddie breathed deeply before signaling he was getting off the road. He got to a parking spot and looked at the cookies, like they were tempting him. He got one and closed his eyes before eating it. Maybe he did need to eat something. 

He debated calling Buck now that he had stopped, making sure that everything was okay back in L.A. and maybe getting some reassurance that this was the correct decision. He knew Buck was supportive of whatever he did, and listening to him might help calm down his nerves. However, Buck was not waiting for him in Texas, Christopher was. And his parents, which was one of the main sources of his stress. A part of him didn’t want to face them. In fact, a part of him wanted to get Chris into the car, put all his stuff in boxes and go back to L.A.

Back to Buck.

And now Buck was living in his house. That was another thing he hadn’t let himself think too deep about. If everything worked out great in Texas, he would like to come back home. That is, to L.A., to the 118. To Buck. But now Buck was living in his place. Would the three of them live together? He wouldn’t be opposed to the idea. He didn’t think Chris would be either. Buck had been an important part of his kid’s life as well as his, he was already like a weird uncle-stepfather figure for him. 

He stopped for a second going back in his train of thought. He had associated Buck with his home. Was that really it? It wasn’t LA and it wasn’t Texas. It was Buck. He made him feel safe and that meant he was, in a sense, his home. He hadn’t thought of his parents’ house as home in so long, he now doubted he ever did call it that; but Buck’s presence gave much more comfort than anything he had received from his parents before. Maybe the saying of “home is where your heart is” wasn’t so wrong. Maybe he wanted to go back home.

He looked out the window and thought back to that final hug between them. Did Buck feel the same as he was feeling now? Did he also feel like a part of him was missing?

He took a deep breath and the last bite of the cookie. He thought about continuing driving, he knew there was still a long way to Texas. Instead, he decided to call home before hitting the road.

[munsonshire]

After Battle

Pairing: Eddie x reader Warnings: Mention of blood, healing, and scars Masterlist

Patching Eddie up after the bat attack is such an odyssey

With all the blood and such you only have time to put some pressure on hus wounds before he passes out

You and Dustin pick Eddie up and try to carry him through the gate, you are able to thank to the fact that Steve, Robin, and Nancy showed up.

You all decide to not take him to the hospital because it is better to keep Eddie's identity secret, it's better to let them believe that he is dead

Steve is the one with the most knowledge on wounds and how to treat them, thanks to all the beatings that he's taken so he tries his best to stabilize Eddie the best he can

The first two days are pretty rough, Eddie keeps going in and out of consciousness, screams in pain when he awakes, and has cold sweats

None of the young ones think that he's gonna make it past the second day, Steve and Robin start to lose hope and Nancy is already thinking of what to do with the body, but not you, you keep cleaning his bandages, reading to him and basically being there with him

Luckily, on the second day the group from California, Joyce and Hopper arrive to Hawkins. They inmediately ask about what happened and get told about Max and Eddie, while the kids go to visit Max at the hospital Joyce and Hopper go to Steves house, where Eddie is staying at the moment. Hopper, after seeing Eddies condition decides to ask for a favour, being the former chief of the police he had a few contacts, after some explaining and a lot of money (that the gobernment had gave them some time ago to stay quiet) he convinces one of the doctors from the hospital to check Eddie out. They end up making a little hospital room in Steves guest room.

Finally, Eddie starts getting better, he wakes up, and there's lots of crying sone between you too, and more when Dustin arrives.

When Eddie gets told what happened and that he barely survived he's so amazed, he barely remembers running toward the demobats.

He gets bedrest for at least 2 weeks, meanwhile, you're on bandage change and wound cleaning duty, after all, you're basically the only person that Eddie trusts and the only one that he lets near him.

The scarring is pretty bad, he knows it's bad and that makes him self-conscious but you try to assure him that they aren't that bad, that when they fully heal they would be pretty metal.

If he flinches when you clean his wounds he's quick to soothe you down and tell you that it's okay.

When they are finally healed you make sure to kiss them every night

[stickdoodlefriend]

A short snippet for you all on this fine Sunday.

Eddie rips his phone out of his pocket and types, 'Are you okay?'

Within seconds, bubbles appear and disappear and appear again, until Christopher's message reads, 'yes? did something happen?'

'Nothing. I love you ❤️' Eddie messages back quickly.

He breathes. If Chris is okay then why does his heart feel like breaking? If his heart-outside-his-body is in El Paso, then why is he being such a selfish father to hesitate out the door?

He shakes his head and draws in a deep breath, straightening his shoulders to the familiar posture, vigilant for a command. Buck is there, the last of the packed boxes crammed into the tiny U-haul which carries the bare essentials for his newest address: a coffee table, some chairs, clothes, etc.

He leaves the rest to Buck because Buck knows how to get better use of them anyway and absentmindedly wonders how strange it is for Buck to sleep on his mattress when he's never even crashed on it in the seven years they've known each other.

Buck draws his attention again so he quickly inventories the contents of the U-Haul and shuts the shutter to ensure none of the items tumble out as he zips through the highway. When he looks up, Buck is already staring at him, mouth parted as if he's holding back his words by biting his tongue.

Right.

There's still one more thing left for him to do, one he has done gladly over and over. 'I know this thing between us has been messy and hard,' he gestures to the space between them, 'I hope you know, you do matter to me.' Because if he is the one to say it, Buck will believe it and know that he is loved to the core.

'I know,' Buck replies, but Eddie catches the minute fall of his shoulders as he sways on the balls of his feet to lean closer to Eddie.

He turns to move, resolute. I will not look back, he thinks. If he looks back, he will know the road he is taking will never take Buck and Eddie will mistake the aftermath as grief to lose him all over again. If he doesn't, the sound of Buck's jeep engine will carry him down to El Paso like this parting is fleeting.

As he makes his way to his truck, he can't resist turning back to look at Buck again one last time because it would be the last, can't help smile so wide like his heart is ripping. The last time, he hadn't looked back, just slammed the gas pedal as harshly as he could, driving against the jagged silhouette of thunder and lightning--Buck dead behind him and Eddie counting the seconds not breathing and his lungs burn like drowning.

So how could regret it, this path on hell, to look back at Buck again and lose him completely?

[lukiaxx]

Runaway Max thoughts

Suspicious Minds thoughts

Runaway Max is written by Brenna Yovanoff and it’s an official Stranger Things novel. It’s written from the point of view of Max Mayfield and it takes place during season 2(late October-early November 1984). It talks about Max’s family struggles. Don’t forget that this is secondary canon, so don’t take anything from this book as 100% canon.

i just took out some parts of the book i found interesting and wrote them down in bullet points

Max’s mom doesn’t like when she spends money on videogames, so she usually plays them when she’s with her dad

her dad doesn’t have a “real job”, he usually works as repairman or makes fake IDs

he cant keep a job because “theres too many rules for him”, and this makes him super relatable to max, they have a lot in common in general

Max liked Terminator, especially Sarah Connor, but she’s disappointed that no women she knows is badass like her

b4 she met the party, she was skating once and fell, and Joyce was nearby and asked her if everythings okay

when Max met Billy for the first time(in April of 1984), she considered him and his car the coolest thing in the world

when he was being mean to her, at first she thought he’s just teasing her

after her parents got divorced, her dad moved from San Diego to LA

when she heard that they’re moving to Hawkins, she tried to run away to LA

Neil(Billy’s dad) was different that other guys Maxs mom dated, because he had a good income, was good with money, and just seemed nice

they met the bank where both of them worked, he even got her flowers for their first date, which none of her previous boyfriends did

Maxs mom was scared of letting her do “dangerous stuff”, that’s one of the reasons she diverced her dad

the first time she “found out what neil actually is” was three weeks after they got married and they were having dinner together, maxs mom said that max could go to summer camp, but when max said she doesn’t want to go, neil started yelling at her and sent her away from the table. after that billy came over to her and said “a person like him cannot be a dad. not for me, not for you.”

max wanted to bring a halloween mask to school, but billy warned her no one will have one

she likes movies about serial killers, because they could be real(she had michael myers mask for halloween that year)(she would be listening to true crime podcasts okay)

she likes halloween(her second favorite holiday after Christmas) because it makes her feel like shes part of something bigger than herself

when lucas and dustin asked her to join them, she didn’t know if they ment it

her friends in cali were Nate, Ben and Eddie

she likes The Go-Go’s, Beach Boys and Sandals

max admitts that billy sometimes can be fun, for example when he takes her to the car service

max can read emotions orfigure out who’s lying very well

during summer break, billy got arrested bc he and his friends sneaked to a construction site

billy and his friends wayne and sid listen to Metallica and Ratt

once they went to a forest with max and found a dead cat there and made it a “viking funeral”(they set the cat on fire)

when she scared the party during trick-or-treating, it was the first time she laughed since they moved here

will reminds her of her friend nate, the quiet type of person that older guys make fun of

maxs mom is that kind of person that desperately wants to believe everything they say to her, so she gets lied to and scammed very easily(mostly by her boyfriends)

max thinks that making fun of will bc “he came back to life” is stupid, bc if he’d really come back to life, he’d be like a superhero

max cant make friends very well, or to pretend to be friendly

“i was showing off, but sometimes you have to show off so people perceive you as a person, not just another girl”

the book talks about sexism a lot and it has few great thoughts in it, but there are often times parts where max puts down other girls for wearing skirts, for example

once billy gave max a cigarette and her mom got super mad, but didn’t tell neil, not that she was scared of billy, she was scared for billy

the first time max saw neil beat billy, she yelled at him to stop, neil said that he’s disappointed that he raised a son who needs to have a little girl to stand up for himself, so when max offered him help after this, he always sent her away

some of maxs friends started avoiding certain hangout spots because they didn’t want to run into Billy while they’re there with her

billy broke her friends Nates arm when they asked him to leave them alone when they were playing

Billy convinced adults that it was just an accident, that he was “showing him some move that Hulk Hogan does, but his arm slipped and it just happened”

after billy saw max at the arcade with lucas, he ran over her board with his car(if you remember, she was then fixing when lucas came over in the show)

after this, max decided to run away again, while her parents’ll go shopping

but lucas came to their house and told her that he has proof, so she goes with him instead

also, guys, this book is so full of lumax moments, why are they so cute omg

like when max scares the party at halloween, she thinks its “kinda cute” how he got scared

the rest of the book was pretty much just the s2 finale from maxs pov

max thinks nancy so cool(she fucking is)

”i knew that girls can be tough as guys, but i used to think that the only way to achieve that is to be exactly like them. nancy didnt look that she was trying to copy steve or hopper”

CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT FUCK MISOGYNY AKFJSJFBAJGNJXF

(about mike)” sometimes, people are just sad, even tho theyre acting like and idiot”

when billy came over and started beating steve, she was the only one who knew how far this could go, so she sedated him

ehhh thats pretty much it

i know that probably the way i wrote this is chaotic and doesnt make much sense

but i liked the book, i read it in one day

thanks for reading

waiting for season 5

have a lovely day

[roseworth]

hi tumblr user roseworth im desperately trying to figure out how old rose and eddie were by the end of their tenures in tt03 / how long they knew each other and it is... difficult especially because sooo much happened dc-event-wise during tt03. do you have any canon sources or noncanon thoughts on their ages beyond eddie being 17 in part of tt03 and rose being 14(?) when lilli dies ^_^

hiiiiii <3 unfortunately i dont have a great answer for this bc. comic timelines. but ill do my very best

so for rose the only time we get anything about her age in tt03 is in issue #0.5 (when she gets taken by slade) when it says that lili and slade met 18 years ago

so i assume that makes rose ~17 when she join slade (since lili would've been pregnant for 9 months after this)

we also get this panel saying that lili died 18 months before rose joins slade, putting her at around 15 or 16 when lili dies. iirc she was 14 when wintergreen sees her for the first time, so we can assume a year went by between wintergreen meeting lili and lili's death (if tt03 is to be believed! but deathstroke 1991 (annual #4) mentions that shes 14 when her mom dies)

anyways this also means that roy hired her as a live-in nanny when she was 16 years old which is really funny to me. but none of that matters; point is she was 17ish at the start of tt03

this is just my personal headcanon but i assume that the time between titans/yj graduation day -> infinite crisis is around a year, and if rose joins up with slade a little after graduation day then shes with him for just under a year

HOWEVER if we go by what slade says in nightwing #112, rose has only been with him for a few months

so based on that, rose is 17 (probably closer to 18) when she leaves slade

then infinite crisis happens and we skip to a year later! so shes 18/19 now. we dont get any specifics on her age but just for funsies we can assume that shes at least 18 since shes smoking and cyborg doesnt have a problem with it (he confiscates her alcohol but not her cigarettes), and the tobacco age in california in 2006 was 18

THEN it gets complicated. i dont have a source for this but i think theres supposed to be a year between oyl -> final crisis, making rose 19/20 by fresh hell (the secret reason she got kicked off the teen titans was because she wasnt a teen #adulthood)

also in fresh hell, she orders alcohol at a bar in canada (in the northwest territories where the drinking age is 19) so theoretically that makes her at least 19. though she never actually gets the drinks because she gets in a fight 2 seconds after this so she doesnt get carded so who knows!

from there. i dont have much. i assume that a full year doesnt go by from fresh hell to the end of the universe (if anyone knows how long bart & kon were dead for that might change things, but i assume we're not given any exact info on how long it was), so i would put rose at ~20 right before the new 52 happens!!

as for eddie, ill use the same tt03 timeline that i used for rose

like you mentioned, hes 17 in tt03 #42 (for reference rose is 18/19 at this time)

he didnt join the teen titans that long before this, we see him asking to join in 52 #51, which is like a week or two before tt03 #34 (the first tt issue after oyl) so its safe to assume that eddie is 17 when he joins the team

anyways after #42, i dont think we get any mention of his age? which is honestly kinda weird since his age is Very Important given that hes selling his soul to neron at 20. we should have an eddie's age tracker at all times

if we assume that hes 17 when he joins the teen titans and oyl -> final crisis is 1 year, then hes right around 18 or 19 when he dies

when he loses his powers then tries to make another contract to get them back in tt03 #68, kid eternity mentions that he'd have "a few years of superheroing," so him being 18 around this time makes sense

then he dies in #74 </3 no mention of his age anywhere but id say hes right around 18 when he dies

take all of this with a grain of salt bc a lot of this is just me making up timelines. but i personally think rose is 15 when her mom dies, 17 when slade takes her, 18 when she leaves slade, and 19 as of tt03 #34 (oyl). and eddie is 17 when he joins the team and 18 when he dies!

[anxiousalienwriter]

So I had to have an unexpected surgery this week leading to me being late to the party with this week's episode. I was thoroughly spoiled but I was trying to save my opinions until I actually watched the episode, and I gotta say. Wtf was that?

Like I think what they were trying to do is have Athena be like the stand in character for the audience. Through her, we need to come to accept Bobby's gone just like Athena accepts by the end of the episode/paralleled with the whole firebaby kidnapping mystery thing. Grief and letting go and all that jazz. And it does make sense to have that character be her since she is Bobby's wife.

However, I would say they failed considering I don't even believe that kid wasn't kidnapped. The mom had to have done something with that DNA test.

Like I'm sorry but you mean to tell me there are TWO kids in the SAME AREA that just so happen to have this super unique birthmark?? Also, NOTHING was left behind from the fire?? Babies may have more cartilage than bone, but they definitely still have bones. And a house fire does not burn hot enough to completely destroy bones. Even baby ones. So like??

(And yes, I did look all this up and have a very weird search history now, so thanks for that 911. I hope my fbi agent realizes this was for confirmation/research purposes)

And this isn't even getting into how this really happened. A woman kidnapped a kid, set the house on fire to cover it up, and then the original mother recognized her kid years later at a birthday party. LIKE??

So if this episode was trying to convince me to let go, it did a bad job. Bobby is absolutely still alive and I'm believing that until the very last second of the last episode of the season. Also the government kept his body for 2 weeks?? It was a closed casket funeral?? No, it's all too suspicious for me.

However, if Bobby does turn out to be dead? This episode was a terrible sendoff. Where are my scenes of all of these characters dealing with their grief? Where's the scene where they're like all sitting around a table, reminiscing about Bobby, taking comfort in their memories and each other? I'm hoping we see more of that in the next two episodes but with how bad the writing has been these last two episodes... I'm not holding my breath.

I mean, come on. A montage for the funeral in the last few minutes of the episode?? The way the promo was, I was led to believe the funeral would be the main focus of the episode. I mean, it sure makes the most sense for it to be since a major character just died. But no. And Eddie not even being there until the day of the funeral?? Which I am so mad about everything they're doing with him but this post is long enough.

I'm just hoping this episode was like trying to get people to accept his death and we get more reactions and the exploration of characters in the coming episodes. Because this was just.... disappointing. Though, Angela and Kenny did do an amazing job with their performances so there were definitely some redeemable qualities of this episode, at least.

Tho that scene with Gerrard talking to Chim at the car accident instead of Hen??? Excuse me?? Wrong. Incorrect. Criminal, actually. Like sure, he's the captain, but Hen's not pushing her way to talk to Chimney who clearly isn't coping?? Why are none of them leaning on each other! It leads me to think they really are just coworkers. I guess all that talk about them being a family and everything was wrong. Also can we please be done with Gerrard? Please.

Idk, man. I'm hopped up on pain meds. But I had to get my thoughts out. Now I'm gonna go back to writing and ignoring canon until better writing enters the picture again like goddamn.

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

Hiiii Cal 💕💕💕💕

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨

🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮🔮

-❤️🪐

HI SATURN!

30 for 🌊:

---

Buck stops short, blinking at Eddie with empty confusion.

“It doesn’t matter who you are!” Eddie says again, calmer. “Not to me.”

“It sure seemed to,” Buck reminds him.

Eddie shakes his head. “I was shocked, Buck. Evan. Whatever. I was in shock.”

The muscles in Buck’s jaw twitch.

“I was shocked that such a thing could even be possible, and shocked that things weren’t the way I understood them to be,” Eddie continues. “I let myself see so much of our relationship as getting you back, and that’s my fault. I was hurt, maybe, that I’d been misled by this… Other Buck. But… But I love you. I want to keep loving you. I know it’s early, I know I hurt you, but please let me try.”

Buck takes a shaky breath. 

“You won’t,” he says after a moment.

“I won’t?” Eddie scoffs, incredulous. “I’m standing here in the middle of a hurricane for you. What do you mean I won’t try?”

“No,” Buck shakes his head. “I mean, you won’t keep loving me.” 

“You don’t know that,” Eddie replies angrily.

“I do,” Buck says, voice tight. He wipes his eyes. “I tend to disappoint people. And I’m not the man you thought you wanted.”

---

15 for 🚨:

---

They don’t really get around to talking about it. Not properly, anyway. And Eddie recognizes that this is largely his fault.

Every time they sit down to have a serious conversation about their changing relationship dynamic, it ends in bed. Partly because, Eddie knows, he is too nervous to bring up the will. He knows he should have focused on the will first, sex second in the proper order of things. But he’s neglected to do so, and the cat’s out of the bag, and the sex is fantastic. It’s really, really hard to choose a potentially uncomfortable conversation over sex. Especially after having none of it since breaking up with Alan. 

Eddie is nervous of the will conversation for one reason alone, and it’s a selfish one. A really selfish one. No part of him thinks Buck would refuse Chris. Out of the question. But, maybe Buck would refuse Eddie. 

Maybe he’d say of course I’ll be there for Chris, but in the interest of doing so, we shouldn’t be together.

---

30 for 🔮:

---

When Bobby opens his eyes again, lucidity returning to him, he notices three oddities in succession. First, he feels completely fine. Better than fine even; more like he is entirely unburdened by the usual troubles of having a human body. Second, he’s standing up. He doesn’t remember standing. Third, he is outside, in the sun, on a quiet, suburban street he doesn’t recognize, flush with verdant gardens and perfectly trimmed hedges. 

For a moment, Bobby wonders if he might be dead. Another heart attack, maybe? A brain aneurysm? What a shame to die in this way. He thinks of the way it will hurt the people he loves. He thinks of how much more time he had wanted with them all. 

Bobby is beginning to feel awash with an intense grief he can’t quite name, when something changes his perspective. Something he doesn’t quite understand. A voice, actually.

“Maddie, let’s get going!” 

Maddie? If this is Heaven, and Bobby is dead, then there is no good reason for anyone to be calling out for Maddie Han. He doesn’t know any other Maddies. Not that, of course, Maddie wouldn’t be present in Heaven if the worst happened. Just, he has no reason to believe she’s dead. Unless everyone died. That would be considerably worse than what he had thought. 

Bobby turns in the direction of the voice. Towards a wide driveway in front of a big, grassy lawn. There’s a U-Haul self-moving van parked in the driveway and a young man in the driver’s seat. Bobby thinks he looks distantly familiar, though he’s not sure why. 

“Maddie!” The guy calls again. “We don’t want to be stuck in rush hour.”

[guessimabasicnerdgirlnow]

So add that to the other equally likely possibilities of:

V survived the acid because you know, acid doesn’t kill symbiotes and they already survived something they shouldn’t have in the first movie (rocket explosion)

V’s main body was destroyed but they are still alive in the small piece they left in the bar, which was in the lab

V did die but remember what the codex does? It can bring one back from the dead! V brought Eddie back in the first movie, Eddie can repay them now. Yeah yeah the codex was supposedly destroyed but was it really??

None of this is new, I know, but I hadn’t written down the possibilities before and it feels like this is the time for it

I haven’t rewatched the movie yet, so there are some things I don’t know for sure, mainly the two tubes thing. I was pretty sure that the tube with the goo from the bar was the same one Teddy took that turned out to be Agony, while my sister told me there were two of them and Agony came from a tube that was already in the lab when the scientists stored the one from the bar

(I still believe in some goo being left behind in the MCU in No Way Home but it could of course be retconned or maybe it was clear in the original scene that it was left in Sonyverse. I have no excuse for not having checked it already)

But not all possibilities depend on a second tube, or even the cockroach, and honestly?

A sequel would be great, but even without a sequel I think it’s clear they are alive somehow I WANT THAT MILKSHAKE BACK

It has probably been said before but

The military guy was very quick to tell Eddie that V was gone forever

He was not in area 51 as far as I remember. He wasn’t directly involved in the events, he wasn’t there to see it. And he is not one of the scientists, who are the ones that best understand symbiotes (and even so their knowledge is limited by the small sample and short time)

He is a military, and he doesn’t want these secrets to leak. He is the least trustworthy source possible. Wouldn’t he say that anyway, no matter if it was true or not, to keep Eddie away from this story?

These were all thoughts I had when seeing the scene for the first time, before even seeing the cockroach, but most importantly before knowing about Flash being there

Of course V could find Flash in a more natural manner but if they want to go with a more comic accurate Agent Venom then not only is V alive but the military know and have them, and lied to Eddie so he would not try looking for them