#nonbinary resouces

[bookbingingproblem]

There is a tragic lack of information and blogs on Agender and identities, specifically null gender, that fall under the Agender umbrella so I've decided to compile all the stuff I've found that helped me out

Agender is considered the same as/synonymous to terms like genderblank, genderfree, genderless, gendervoid, non-gendered, ungendered, and null gender  

Neutrois, genderless, null gender and neutral gender are used interchangeably, but are sometimes differentiated by the emphasis of lacking or having neutral gender.

E.g. Null gender / Genderless are similar, but are unlike Neutrois/Neutral gender because the definitions strongly lean towards lacking gender completely

E.g. Neutrois / Neutral gender are considered interchangable, but are different from Null/genderless because their definitions strong implications of having a neutral gender (usually somewhere between, or off the spectrum of boy and girl) Neutrois gender wiki link

!! important !! These labels are used casually by those under the agender label!!! So if you feel neutral but like a term emphasizing the lack of gender go for it! it's up to you!! Try it out!!! Pick what's comfortable!! Trust your gut!!

Null gender

(Coined by dieselwolfe) (?)

All have links to the 3 wiki's/websites I was able find information in..

"... feels their gender does not include aspects of being a male or aspects of being a female. There is sometimes a strong emphasis on the rejection of gender stereotypes concerning behavior and traits. Null-Gendered people sometimes like to just describe their gender as being just me implying an emphasis on the fact that specific gender categorizations are unneccesary considering the complexity of people and their behaviors."

"It may also be associated with genderlessness, and shares many similarities with agender - people who consider themselves neutrally gendered or genderless, but some may identify as both..." (Definition also applied to Neutrois)

"An I don’t want a label because labels don’t fit but they help shut people up sometimes, so here have a label' gender label." (under tab 'Lists of kinds of Agender identities")

Agender/Null gender Experience

Here is a link to a Reddit of people talking about their experiences and getting philosophical about gender.

(mentions gender presentation vs. gender identity, misogyny, and the pointlessness of boy/girl classification)

Quotes from the reddit that are possibly relevant about being Agender and the Gender journey:

"Basically, it's a preference. If someone feels the need to identify themselves as agender, then they're agender." - reddit user

"He says that having no strong perception of one's gender is just a 'symptom' of being cisgender, i.e., only people who are born into the wrong gender develop a strong perception of their gender

My wife is cis and feels strongly feminine. Tada: counterexample, disproven.

Honestly, I think there's a semi-easy answer to the overall question. Imagine that you wake up tomorrow and your body has changed gender. What's your first thought?" - reddit user

"I'm more of a masculine person, but I feel uncomfortable when I'm implicated as a man, or when I have to choose between "male" or "female" (I know that I am certainly not female, as well), or when I'm cornered into calling myself a man.

To me, it all just seems arbitrary. I don't really have a stake in being male, or being female, or being any gender, really, so I decided that perhaps I could best describe myself as agender and leave it at that." - reddit user

!! Reminder !! Just because you may not resonate with these folk's perspective 100% does not mean you do not got fit with the label!!! This is just to give perspective, don't stress over comparing your experience to theirs!!! Trust yourself!!!

A quick Thank you to @raavenb2619, and every other gender questioning blog, for their questioning-agender tag! The tag helped me find these resources which helped me grow comfortable with this label!!

Idk if I'm completely comfortable with this one yet, but thank you for giving me the chance to find out.

Please tell me if anything needs to be fixed or corrected!! If you need to talk DM me bc I'm also trying to figure myself out and would love to talk!

[thetroublesofbeingtrans]

I saw a tiktok the other day that was showing the "nonbinary aesthetic" and included binders... idk how to tell u guys that constantly excluding amab nonbinary people is bad...

edit: wanted to say, amab is not exactly the right wording- a lot of people pointed out that amab people can have breasts and may want to bind. for context, the tiktok only showcased afab nb people and?? cis women from google images with pixie cuts? so that's where I was coming from when I wrote this. The first thing that came to mind to me when I saw it was there r literally no amab in this 'nb aesthetic' thing and if I were amab and nonbinary I would feel kinda shitty about this! so there

[realtransfacts]

Hi there, firstly I wanna say thanks for everything you do on this blog, it’s really helped figure things out for myself. Second, I’m nonbinary (genderqueer/neutrois) and was afab. I’ve recently gone to the doctor to talk about going on T and was told immediately that they can prescribe it to me. While this would likely help with dysphoria and such, I’m so surprised by it that it threw me off. Do you have resources for starting t? Is it normal to feel anxious about taking that next step?

Yes, it’s pretty common to feel anxious about starting T, even when you know that it will help you. It’s a big life decision to make so of course there will be nerves associated with it even if you feel it’s the right choice to make.

I’ve got a HRT masterpost here that hopfully has some resouces relevant to you:http://realtransfacts.tumblr.com/post/179084091760/hrt-masterpost

[periodfcnetwork]

do you know of any Vico Ortiz gifs? or other nonbinary fcs with period resouces?

yara made a pack a week ago! you can also check this tag for other enby fc reblogged here! if anyone knows of any other nonbinary fcs with no resources, feel free to send it into our fc wishlist box as well <3

[thejamzine-blog]

Run For Your Life, I Think Not

Considering misogyny in The Beatles’ “Run For Your Life”

*Content Warning: Domestic Violence, Intimate Partner Violence*

3,954,324. That’s the number of plays The Beatles’ “Run For Your Life” has on Spotify at time of writing (and Spotify has included The Beatles discography for less than two years). Beatle’s Maniacs and “let me spew all about music history on our first date so I can appear intellectual”-types may argue that “Run For Your Life,” released on 1965’s Rubber Soul, was merely reflective of the ’60s culture from which it was born, where a man could beat his wife and everyone would go to church on sunday as if nothing ever happened, but the Fab Four’s continued cultural impact means we need to consider their influence carefully. The Beatles had an irrefutable hand in shaping modern music and in light of this accolade people may argue the band should be forgiven for that one ‘bad song,’ but that’s simply not true. We’ve seen this logic before, such as in the case of Brock Turner, the ‘Stanford Rapist’ and a collegiate swimmer, who was given a light sentence for his crime  a harsh sentence would have a ‘severe impact on him’ as a young college student. He did one ‘bad thing’ and that shouldn’t tarnish the rest of his career. Though The Beatles only imply violence through their song, this implication is not a lighthearted manner. Thankfully, these days the world has become wary of the exclusively white male band that totes lyrics of abuse and objectification of women. However, it’s painful to think that a go-to classic such as The Beatles have had a hand in this misogyny as expressly seen in the threatening lyrics of “Run For Your Life”:

Well I’d rather see you dead, little girl Than to be with another man You better keep your head, little girl Or I won’t know where I am

You better run for your life if you can, little girl Hide your head in the sand, little girl Catch you with another man That’s the end, little girl

It is a wonder that such hateful lyrics can be sung in such a buoyant and blissful way. “I’d rather see you dead” is a direct threat to the life of the woman subject of the song. Some may argue this is just an over-exaggeration. There are NO excuses for violence against women. Violence is a real and present danger for women, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, 1 in 3 women experience physical violence, sexual violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner in their lifetime . This is a statistic that is all too real, either we have experienced this or one of our close friends has, and it is NOT a joke. In response to this statistic people may say “it happened one time, he was probably just really upset” or “he just hit her, it’s fine.” It’s not fine. Domestic Violence research points out that abusive behavior is repetitive and those who exhibit abusive behavior often have repeat instances of abuse with multiple partners. National Coalition Against Domestic Violence research also shows that violence often escalates. 72% of all murder-suicides involve an intimate partner; 94% of the victims of these murder suicides are female.

Let’s not forget: calling a woman a ‘little girl’ is demeaning and toxic. ‘Little girl’ implies that woman is still dependent, similar to how a little girl is dependent on the parental figures in her life. Her words are not taken seriously by adults, and thus she is a powerless figure (which of course is how society often treats girls, a problem in it’s own accord). Not only is the female character in the song patronized, but she is claimed by the male singer as property. Here the idea of ‘if I can’t have you, no one will’ arises. A sense of entitlement found in toxic masculinity that states a woman must be owned or must not exist at all. Depending on the parameters of a couple's relationship, cheating is an act of betrayal, however, women’s lives are not just fodder for some tragic murder/abuse/rape plot device and women do not deserve to be threatened as so.

Though John Lennon is credited as the songwriter (technically, both he and Paul McCartney are credited, but that was standard for songs written by either of the two), he tries to distance himself from the song. In a 1970 Rolling Stone interview, Lennon claims he ripped the lines “I’d rather see you dead, little girl/ than to be with another man, little girl” from a 1955 recording of country tune “Baby Let’s Play House” sung by Elvis Presley, written by songwriter Arthur Gunter. Lennon may try to distance himself from this song through the argument that the lyrics were borrowed from the past and not a reflection of his own ideas, but it still remains problematic. The issue lies in the fact that Lennon chose to fashion those antiquated and dangerous lyrics into a pop song fit for the masses, in the end it was his (and arguably his label and producer’s) decision to perpetuate misogyny.

What can one do in the face of antiquated misogyny? One step could be not listening to “Run For Your Life” or other songs and artists that perpetuate messages of violence. As consumers we have the power of our wallets to support or deny products, songs, messages, ideas. Instead, give the royalties from your listening platform to female and non-binary artists who stand up against violence and misogyny. You have the ability to advocate for equality, even if that means simply putting on your headphones. —SM

In response to The Beatles “Run For Your Life,” here’s a playlist of femme musicians you can support instead. These songs feature lyrics presenting female power and characters who have agency over their lives—characters who are no 'little girl':

*Though the focus of this article was on violence towards women, 1 in 4 men also experience intimate partner physical violence, intimate partner sexual violence, and/or intimate partner stalking in their lifetime.

*Additionally, “Run For Your Life” can be seen as a narrative sung about a straight couple, However, to think that intimate partner violence is only present in heteronormative relationships is a dangerous thought. Queer, trans, and nonbinary individuals are also survivors of intimate partner violence and should be supported and advocated for. For more information on intimate partner violence in the queer community: https://www.hrc.org/resources/sexual-assault-and-the-lgbt-community

*If you find yourself in an intimate partner violence situation, when safe call 1-800-799-7233 for the National Domestic Violence Hotline. There is no shame in getting help. Consider visiting The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence for more tips and resouces: http://ncadv.org/learn-more/get-help/accessing-resources

*More information on domestic violence research can be found at http://ncadv.org/learn-more/statistics

[realtransfacts]

Today I was taking to my mom about my identity and the LGBTQ community and she bluntly said "I fucked up" thus making my (nonbinary) identity a reality and wondered what she did while raising caused me to be this way and what she could have done differently. I really wish I had a coherent way to tell her that's there's nothing wrong with me even though she doesn't believe that. When she says this she's sure to say she loves me but it's getting harder to believe. Do you have advice to offer?

I’m so sorry your mom reacted like that. That’s really shitty of her and you deserve much better than to have to deal with that kind of transphobia.

If you think there is a chance she might be more accepting if she had more info wrt trans issues, you could perhaps try to show her something from [genderspectrum’s resouces] or similar and ask her to read through it.

And you could try to give her some time to process this, too. It sucks and it’s horrible and it’s painful to be around someone who doesn’t accept you, just waiting and hoping for them to start to treat you better. But sometimes they do. So that hope is not always for nothing.

But please know that even if your mom doesn’t change, you won’t have to be around her forever. It might not always feel like it, and it may not always be a near future, but sometime in the future you will be able to surround yourself with people who love you and support you for who you are.