#nobody gave me the option of not being born

[lemonlover1110]

𝐁𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐅𝐫𝐮𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

Sukuna

[Chapter 3] Wedding Night

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Pairing: Trueform!Sukuna x f!Reader

Warnings: MDNI, Mentions of Cannibalism, Smut, Slight Dub-Con, Virginity Loss, Oral Sex (f. receiving), Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Masturbation, Creampie, Slight Breeding Kink

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You swore that on the day of your wedding, you’d be the happiest woman alive. Being born a mere peasant and in a happy family gave you the option of marrying for love. But things change in the blink of an eye.

Neither of you really have families to do most of the wedding ceremony traditions, which cuts the wedding short. He has no interest in any of it, and you don’t feel any sort of joy while you commit yourself to one another. Perhaps you feel a twinge of satisfaction when you receive the title of Sukuna’s wife. 

If you die today, at least you won’t die as a nobody.

After the ceremony, he sends you away to your room. You’re not allowed to do anything even when you hold the title of his wife, at least not when your whims contradict his wishes. Therefore you’re left to sit in silence in your room, and you have no idea for how long you’ll be left in this state. He’ll visit you at night to get what he wants, and you still have a long way to go.

You’re staring off into space, your mind playing a filthy scene of how this will play out. He’s not going to be patient nor gentle, he definitely isn’t the kind. He’s going to fulfill his task and leave you seeking for pleasure once he’s finished. You aren’t expecting anything else, from what you’ve heard, men are selfish lovers. Though Sukuna isn’t exactly a man, you’re sure it applies to him.

“King Sukuna ordered for lady Kyoko to join you.” Uraume informs you before opening the door and letting the woman walk inside, not waiting for your response. She holds her head high when she walks into the room, wearing similar attirement as you. The servants don’t dare to look you in the eye anymore, the news that you’re the wife of Sukuna has spread, and they won’t dare test your authority.

Yet this woman isn’t scared of looking you in the eye, that’s all you need to know.  You have the authority of telling her to look down, but you have yet to find the voice.

“And who are you supposed to be exactly?” You ask her, wanting the confirmation that she’s been intimate with him before jumping to conclusions. There’s a hint of a smirk on her face, an aura of superiority around her. She sits directly across from you.

“One of King Sukuna’s dearest companions.” She sounds cocky, which gives you every answer that you need to know. “He told me to prepare you for tonight.”

“Right, of course.” You nod, feeling your face get warm. The cockiness goes away, and she gets serious as she begins to speak about Sukuna. She’s been ordered to tell you all you need to know for your first night with him, even though she clearly doesn’t want to speak about this.

You only hear about how to please him. You hear about everything you need to do to satisfy Sukuna, and how to handle two of them. You pick up on the jealousy as she explains everything, and it’s hard to ignore the way she glares at you.

You’re taking in every detail about her. She wears the makeup Sukuna expected you to wear last night: white powder, and red beni on her lips. The same makeup look that Uraume said made you look like a fool. 

“It’s not that hard, anyway.” She finishes. She’s staring you down, her eyes feel like they can burn a hole into you. Her gaze feels cold and nasty. “Though you don’t look like you can handle it.”

“I don’t think so either.” You don’t want to begin bickering and get on anyone’s bad side, even if you’re already her mortal enemy. You can’t lay it on thick. You look down at the ground, as if you were too ashamed to say it, “I’m not sure why he would pick me to carry his heir… Why didn’t Sukuna pick you, his dearest companion?”

“Sukuna? You dare call your king, Sukuna!” She yells, not really caring about anything else that has left your mouth. You dare call Sukuna merely by his name when you’re just a lowly human. “This should get your head rolling on the floor! No one calls King Sukuna simply Sukuna.”

“I understand your confusion… But I’m not just no one, I am his wife.” You correct her, fighting back on smiling as the words leave your lips. “I’m not sure either, we just met yesterday. He arranged a ceremony per my request this morning but it’s all too sudden.”

“His wife.” She scoffs, rising from her seat. A title that you don’t deserve, therefore she won’t acknowledge you as such. She doesn’t say anything else before exiting the room, leaving you to sit in silence once again. You could’ve handled the situation in a different manner, but regardless, you’re satisfied with your course of action.

“You’ll be having dinner with King Sukuna.” Uraume announces before promptly dragging you out of the room and where you’ll dine. You’re met with a long table filled with all kinds of foods, and your stomach growls, a hunger that you didn’t know you had, consuming you. Uraume takes you to the end of the table, the end that’s far away from all the food. “You must wait for him before getting your food.”

“Of course.” You nod in response. Every meal that you’ve been offered so far has been awful, but the food on the table makes your mouth water so perhaps the cooking changes when Sukuna is going to be present. “When will he show up?”

“He should be here soon.” Uraume tells you, before stepping away. The moment they step away, you hear the echo of his loud footsteps as he approaches the dining room.

He walks inside, sitting across from you and not even bothering to spare you a look before digging into the food. He’s taking it all for himself, and you’re too scared to even stretch your hand out. You’re too shy to ask for any food, but thankfully, you’re brought your own separate meal.

Your appetite dies down the moment your eyes look down at it… It’s very different from Sukuna’s. Either different people cooked your food or there was no effort put into yours. You try not to judge the food by its appearance, and take your first bite. You nearly gag when the food touches your tongue, but you try to remain polite and force yourself to chew then swallow.

“Is the food not to your liking? It looks like you’re being forced to swallow shit.” Sukuna speaks up, and you look at your plate in shame. 

“It’s bad.” You answer. He yells for the servants, and within seconds a group is gathered right before him. They’re on their knees, eyes staring at the floor in front of them, not daring to look up at him.

“Remake her food, and make it right this time.” He orders, and they respond in unison. The same response that Sukuna gets every time he speaks: Yes, king. Sukuna glances at you before glancing at the people that kneel before him. “Bring out the person that made the food.”

“What are you going to do to them?” You chime in, but you’re ignored. Your word doesn’t seem to matter when you’re speaking to Sukuna. He knows why you ask, and he doesn’t care enough. You’re bound to see some bloodshed eventually, you better start getting used to it.

“Uraume made the food.” He’s informed, and his opinion changes. He retracts his former statement, simply ordering that someone else makes it to your liking. He dismisses them, and continues to eat his food.

“Does Uraume make your meals?” You ask him, your question falling on deaf ears. It’s a situation where you speak when you’re spoken to, and he didn’t speak to you first.

“Kyoko came running to me, yelling how you disrespected me.” He brings up, and you raise your brows. Suddenly you begin to feel sweaty, nerves consuming you. “What did you exactly say about me?”

“I called you Sukuna instead of formally addressing you.” You confess, and you begin to think over and over again of how to begin your apology. But you know that an apology won’t be well received, so instead of saying anything else you look down at the table in complete and utter shame. “Which should be fine, no? We just got married.”

“It is fine.” He reassures you. “You have the power to be harsh. Don’t embarrass me.”

“Embarass you how?” You question. “Were you listening?”

“Don’t try to get under her skin, words won’t shed blood.” He ignores the question. “If someone dares disrespect you, you must make them pay.”

“Well, I wouldn’t want to hurt your dearest companion.” You answer, and he scoffs. It’s clear that she thinks highly of herself when Sukuna couldn’t really care less about her.

“You said it yourself, I picked you instead of her.” He responds. “She’s not so dear to me if I chose a woman I just met over her.”

“Right… I’ll make her pay next time.” You nod your head, but you’re not going to do it. You aren’t going to make anyone shed blood because you aren’t like him. 

You hear your stomach growl as Sukuna continues to eat, and you can’t help but ask, “Can I taste?”

“Of course.” He doesn’t even waste a second before stretching his arm out in your direction, holding a bowl full of food. Before your chopsticks touch the food, Uraume comes into the dining room and speaks up,

“He’s a cannibal.” Which makes you freeze in your spot. You retract your hand, and Sukuna rolls his eyes. It now makes sense why he has a whole separate meal, and why his meal seems so tasty even if it’s made by the same person that cooks your food. It should be a more shocking confession, but you’re not surprised at all.

“Why’d you ruin my fun!” He yells, though he sounds more annoyed than angry. He’s ignored by Uraume, truly the only person who has that power. Instead of listening to him, they put your new plate of food in front of you.

“I’m so sorry the food wasn’t to your liking, my queen.” Uraume bows down before you, and you’re taken back by it. You’re not sure how to respond, it isn’t anything that warrants an apology in your eyes. “I didn’t make the meal, another servant did.”

“Bring them in.” Sukuna orders, and Uraume rises from the ground. They walk away and you’re about to dig into your new meal, but his voice stops you. “Don’t you dare.”

“It looks fine.” You answer. The food actually looks appetizing, and your hunger grows by the second. But he refuses to give you permission, and you won’t dare defy him. “Can I have just a taste? I’m hungry.”

He ignores you, tapping his finger on the table impatiently. Uraume finally walks back inside, dragging the woman that cooked your meal by her kimono.

“It was her.” Uraume speaks, as the woman bows down on the floor, not daring to raise her head. Sukuna lifts her up by the collar, while one of his hands reaches for your food. He forces her mouth open and stuffs her mouth.

“Chew.” He orders, and she’s trembling in fear. She forces herself to chew, too slow for his liking. “Hurry up and swallow.”

Once she swallows the food in her mouth, he tosses her aside and puts the plate right back in front of you. He stares at the woman for a minute before he finally asks, “Do you think that’s good enough for her to eat?”

“Yes, my king.” She almost hesitates, but she knows that hesitating won’t do her any good.

“You may eat.” He directs his attention to you, and you nod in response. You feel nervous for the woman that kneels before you. She’s around your age, probably here for similar reasons as you, and her life hangs by a thread. Even if you hate the food that’s in front of you, you’ll put on a smile and pretend that it’s the best meal you’ve ever eaten.

Luckily, you don’t have to fake anything because the food that touches your tongue is one of the best things that you’ve tasted. You tell him with a mouthful of food, “It’s so good.”

“Then she’ll be your servant.” Sukuna responds before standing up and walking away. Uraume follows, leaving you to look at her in confusion, though she doesn’t dare to lift her head. What exactly does that entail?

“What’s your name?” You ask her.

“Hina.”

“You can lift your head, Hina. I don’t bite. I’m not Sukuna.” You can’t help but chuckle. She slowly lifts her head, and she finally gets a good look at you. Her cheeks slowly get pink as she stares at you, and she averts her gaze. “Please keep me company, I’ve been dying to have a conversation with someone normal.”

You wait in your room the same way you did last night. Uraume got you ready again, changing your attire into something more fresh and with less layers. They realized that putting you in traditional attire is just going to be a waste of time and resources since they doubt that Sukuna will be gentle with the robes.

You feel more comfortable this time around, feeling like you can finally breathe. You’re ready for what awaits tonight. Kyoko wasn’t the nicest woman, but she explained everything well enough. You had an idea of what was waiting for you, but now you exactly know what the night has in store for you.

You hear the sound of his loud footsteps, and you feel your nerves building up. This time around you don’t tremble in fear. You take a deep breath to calm yourself before he gets to you. She told you it’d be quick, and while at first it’s going to be uncomfortable, what’s to come will also leave you craving for more.

He enters the room, eyes immediately glancing down at you. You rise, remembering what she told you: First, you must help him get undressed. But before your hand touches the fabric of his robe, his hand stops you. 

The simple touch awakens something in you. Your hand tries to break free from his grasp, but it won’t move. A new feeling consumes you, and the thought of feeling Sukuna in every sense doesn’t make you tremble– Quite the opposite, you want it. You want everything he has to offer.

You’re looking up at him, studying each and every one of his features. He looks unusual, though that doesn’t mean he looks bad. He’s handsome in his own way, at least more handsome than the many men that you’ve come across with.

“There’s no reason for you to be in a rush.” He tells you. No matter how hard you try to break free from his grasp, he can hold back all of your strength without breaking a sweat. “I’m not running away.”

His hand goes under your chin, forcing you to look up at him. He’s smirking at you, knowing he’s about to ruin you. Two hands are trying to take off your robe, which isn’t a hard task but he grows impatient. You’re hearing the fabric rip, realizing that he’s getting straight to the point.

“Can you kiss me?” Your words make him freeze in his spot. It feels pathetic to say but if you don’t ask, he won’t do it. He rolls his eyes before leaning down and pecking your lips, pulling away quickly. He continues to tear down the fabric of your robe, until it’s on the floor. 

He saw you naked yesterday while you bathed, but you still can’t help but feel shy when you’re completely bare in front of him. You don’t have enough hands to cover yourself, and even if you tried, he’d tear them away. There’s no reason for you to feel shy, after all, he isn’t going to inspect your body and look for any flaws it might have. He gets straight to the point.

He lowers his head, lips kissing down your neck to your breasts. His lips feel tender on your skin, a sensation that you would have never imagined to come from Sukuna. A chill runs down your spine as you feel his tongue circle around your nipple. You weren’t warned about it, but you aren’t unhappy either.

You squeeze your legs together, an increasing sensation between them with each of his movements. His warm mouth takes in your nipple, harshly sucking as his hand fondles your other breast. He pinches your other nipple harshly, making a whine escape your lips.

Sukuna bites down before pulling away. He kisses the valley of your breasts before his tongue swipes over your neglected breast. Your mind focuses on how his tongue feels on your skin, that you almost miss one of his hands traveling down your stomach and to your pussy.

A breathy moan leaves your throat, your body getting overwhelmed with what he’s doing. You were expecting a lot tonight, just not this. Two very large fingers spread your folds, and as a reaction, your legs squeeze together. You swear you hear a low chuckle from him before he bites down your nipple once again. This time your whine is much louder.

“I’m going to have fun with you.” He’s amused with this. He nearly drops you to the ground, but luckily he puts his hand under your head before it touches the floor. He gets on his knees while his hands go to your legs, nails digging into your thighs. 

He puts your legs over his shoulders, and you hold your breath, knowing what’s to come. You expect him to take off his robe, and finally do what you’re expecting him to do. You’re clenching around nothing, your excitement radiating through your body. He doesn’t make an effort to get undressed though. 

“No one’s ever touched you here before, right?” He sounds cocky as two fingers run through the folds of your pussy. You bite down your lip before shaking your head, making a smug smile come to his face. He’s proud of it. “No one else will either.”

Sukuna has never been one to care for virginity or purity of any sorts when it comes to sleeping with other people– With you it’s different. He picked you for your innocence, and getting the chance to ruin you in every sense is thrilling for him. Knowing that he’s going to be your first and your last lover fulfills him.

“What–” You begin when he begins to lower his head, though you’re cut off by a breathy moan that leaves your lips as his tongue runs through your pussy. His tongue lays flat on your clit, and you feel your breath get caught up in your chest as an unfamiliar feeling overtakes your whole body.

His tongue flicks your clit, and your back arches, shutting your eyes as pleasure overtakes you. He’s yet to do anything, yet your mind is clouded with sex. Is this what you were worried about? You can’t help but mutter, “That’s so good.”

“Be loud.” He orders, pulling away from your pussy. His fingers take the place of his tongue, lazily circling your clit with little to no pressure. 

“What if someone hears?” You question, and he scoffs. He’s never heard a dumber question.

“What? That you’re my woman?” He responds, and you feel your face get even hotter than it already is. You talk as if Sukuna doesn’t control everything and everyone that resides in the place, he couldn’t care less if they hear what he does. “If it embarrasses you, I’ll kill them.”

“No– Ah!” His mouth goes back down, his warm lips going straight to your clit and sucking on it. You feel as two fingers run through your folds, gathering the slick that your body has produced, before he pushes his middle finger into you. 

It’s an uncomfortable new feeling, even if his whole finger isn’t inside of you. He’s kind enough to give you a moment before slowly piping his finger in and out of you. His head rises from between your legs and he tells you, “Relax.”

“Can you put your mouth there again?” You quickly ask, and just this once, he’ll please you. His tongue messily runs through your pussy before focusing on your clit once again, using the opportunity to push a second finger into your cunt. 

He curves his fingers in a manner that makes a loud moan escape your lips. You can’t hold yourself back when Sukuna worships your body. You were expecting the night to head in a very different direction with your given knowledge, but you couldn’t be more happy to be proven wrong.

“Sukuna!” You moan, as pressure builds up in your lower abdomen. He takes his fingers out of your pussy, leaving them to clench around nothing but within seconds his tongue moves down to your entrance and he pushes it in. You feel his tongue move around, while his thumb begins to play with your clit. 

You look at him through heavy lids, your eyes shutting on their own as pleasure consumes you. He’s too focused on doing his task correctly to actually spare you a glance. You’d say that he’s enjoying this more than you are, but you quickly stop that train of thought. Sukuna isn’t the type to enjoy satisfying others.

Your voice gets caught up in your throat, your body becoming tense and your back arching as you reach the high that you’ve been told about– They always told you that you’d know when it would happen, and you never believed it. It’s an unmistakable feeling.

And just as you come down from that feeling, you realize that you’re getting to the part that you’ve been anticipating.

Your legs come off his shoulders, and Sukuna undoes his robe with such gentleness that your outfit sadly wasn’t met with. You swallow thickly, seeing his full body on display. You don’t consider yourself a greedy woman, but seeing him completely naked makes you want more. 

You need more. 

“Is it going to fit?” You can’t help but ask as your eyes land on the two dicks. One stacked on top of the other. They aren’t exactly small either.

“We’ll make it fit.” He says without thinking twice about it, and your thighs squeeze together. His palm goes to the front of your face and tells you, “Spit on it.”

You don’t have to be told twice before spitting on his hand. He uses your spit to coat his cocks before grabbing your legs, and wrapping them around his waist. Even when you see what awaits you, your desire and hunger for him grows. 

He takes his bottom cock into his hand, stroking it a couple of times before running it through your folds. You watch him bite down his lip as he slowly pushes himself inside of you. A whine leaves your lips, feeling uncomfortable as his cock stretches you out.

“You’re so fucking tight.” He says, waiting a second before he begins to thrust in and out of you. His eyes are nearly rolling to the back of his head, feeling too good as he feels you around him for the first time. He manages to remain stoic, as if this isn’t one of the best sensations that his body has felt in ages.

She was right, it is weird your first time, especially with how big Sukuna is. You’re too focused on this new feeling to allow yourself to feel any pleasure. But you’re sure of one thing, you’ll definitely be wanting more. With the way he’s made your body feel, you’ll definitely be begging him for more.

You watch as one of his hands begins to stroke the top dick, fulfilling his needs since he can’t expect much from you tonight.

“Sukuna…” You mutter, and you hear him groan as you say his name. You know he likes it.

“Say it again.” Sukuna is getting off at you saying his name. You feel a pair of fingers toying with your clit, and you feel that sensation once again. Your back arches, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as it consumes you.

“Fuck!” You loudly moan, instead of saying his name per his request. While he’s strict about people following his orders, he’ll let it slide this one time. He’s too lost in you to care about anything else.

“I’m going to fill you up with my child.” He tells you as his thrusts speed up. You’re squeezing even more around his cock, your second orgasm building up and washing over you quickly. “You’re going to give me my heir.”

He’s getting a little too rough for you, his thrusts becoming harsher by the second until he finally fills you with his seed. He gets you messy, his top cock making a mess and coating your stomach. He finally pulls out, leaving you empty. 

He’s taking deep breaths as he grabs your legs, bending your knees and bringing them to your chest. You’re too overwhelmed to say anything, and you know he isn’t one of many words.

He grabs his robe and puts it on once again, while you remain in the position he put you in. He doesn’t tell you anything until he’s finally dressed, practically out of the door,

“I’ll be back tomorrow night.”

[theemporium]

here's the second instalment! i know i made the poll but i decided i was doing both options because i am indecisive, and i love max and trouble too much to abandon them

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Max tapped his foot against the wooden floor, his eyes focused on some random poster on the wall of the cramped dental office. 

He didn’t like this. He didn’t like any of this. He didn’t like the idea that he was going to be put under. He didn’t like he wouldn’t be in control of anything for the next few hours. He didn’t like the fact that when he woke up, he would be woozy and unable to control the words that passed his lips. 

He didn’t like the lack of control. 

But the pain had reached a point of unbearable and he knew if he didn’t get this done, his mother would fly over and drag him into the dental practice by his ear—and that was something he certainly didn’t want. He would never live it down if journalists caught pictures of the three time world champion being berated by his mother like a whiny child. 

He hated the fact his stupid wisdom teeth were causing this many problems in the first place.

“Did you know that thirty-five percent of humans are born without wisdom teeth?”

Max’s head turned to look at you, his brows furrowed together. “What?” 

“A third of the human population aren’t born with wisdom teeth,” you repeated as you leaned back in your chair next to him, your knees brushing when you did. “Isn’t that weird?” 

“I would say they are lucky,” he grumbled honestly.

“And in Korea, they call them love teeth,” you continued, ignoring the confused look Max shot you. “Because they start to come through around the age people typically experience their first love.” 

“Does that mean it’s your fault I’m in pain?” Max teased, a hint of a smile on his face for the first time since he woke up that morning.

“Love is pain, baby,” you grinned back at him. “And did you know that the oldest record of wisdom teeth being impacted goes back almost fifteen thousand years ago—”

“What’s with all these fun facts?” Max questioned. 

“It’s what keeps you calm, no?” You said, looking at him with a fond expression he was still learning to not instantly blush over. “You maxsplain all the time and it helps you relax. I thought maybe maxsplaining wisdom teeth would help ease your nerves.” 

“So you learn a load of facts for me?” He asked, a giddy smile fighting its way onto his face.

“I did,” you said as you reached over to gently squeeze his knee. “I know you’re not gonna say it but it’s okay to be nervous. I’ll be waiting for you.” 

He gulped, nodding his head slightly in thanks and you knew better than anyone else that the nod was his own way of thanking you.

…

“Trouble? Is that you?”

“Yeah, it’s me, baby,” you grinned as you reached for his outstretched hand, trying not to snicker at the way he cuddled your palm to his chest. “How are you feeling?”

“They drugged me,” he mumbled out, his eyes blinking slowly as he ignored the dentist and nurses in the room and kept his focus on you. “Not the good drugs. The bad ones. I think they are trying to kill me.”

You snorted. “Nobody is gonna kill you while I’m around. Promise.”

“My hero!” He laughed, a little short lived as he seemed to realise the gauze in his mouth. “Baby, I don’t like this candy.”

“It’s not candy,” you said to the boy and watched as he instantly frowned. 

“I want candy,” he huffed out.

“Max—”

“Trouble, they tried to kill me! I’m a hostage!” He said, sounding exasperated and you had to lift your hand to cover your mouth in hopes he didn’t realise you were laughing. “I at least deserve some candy.”

“I’ll get you some on the way home,” you told the boy, unable to even pretend to act annoyed as he cheered in his seat as his head rolled back. 

“See, Janet!” He turned to the nurse who was standing on the other side of his chair and winked with both eyes. “Told you my good looks would work. She gave in.”

Janet laughed, shaking her head. “You were right, sweetie. You’ve got quite the catch there.”

Max sighed dreamily. “She’s the best.”

.

[lotus-pear]

Can we stop acting like dazai was the devil. Like yes he did bad things but he was a child. He was 15 alone and in the mafia where althe was told to do was bad things. ALL dazai knew how to do is lie and deceive because it what he's always had to do.it's self preservation. Like??? When will people realize dazai wasn't a monster and was justa child brought up in an Unsafe and abusive environment. Behaviors are learned your aren't born with them. Dazai was a suicidal child just trying to survive all'he knew was manipulation and Iying because that's all he was taught. He abused akutagawa because that's all he was taught. And as he got older it's all he knows how to do. Obviously he's gotten better but he's still morally grey. And that's ok but it's not enough to call him a monster. hes trying so so hard to change, and even if he may not realise it or cling guiltily to his past, the entire prison arc shows how much effort hes put in to become a better person it isnt easy, growing up exposed to death/violence resulting in empathy and apathy issues, all while battling an emptiness inside thats slowly eating up ones will to live. hes genuinely trying to recover from that period of his life, and i cannot express how proud i am solely because of that. hes finally found a healthy environment, a family, and he deserves it along with so much more. he may be deemed as a “monster“ in the past, that cannot be erased, but he hates that part about himself too. being in the good or bad used to make no difference to him, but i strongly believe it does hate that part of him.  Dazai slander are fún and everything - BUT people seem to not get his character right. No, he's not an edgy boy. He genuinely wants to change for the best to make Oda proud, 'BUT HE ABUSED AKUTAGAWA’ , yeah, Akutagawa abused Kyoka and nobody is talking about how its litterally GENERATIONAL TRAUMA. Dazal was never raised correctly, he got raised by Mori and used by him to make him his right hand, maybe because of his ability, or he saw potential in him. He never fell parental Love nor being special to Someone except for Oda. "He LEFT Chuuya!!!“ ok and? Chuuya doesn't need him to live: Dazai LITTERALLY SAW PEOPLE GETTING KILLED/KILLING THEM ON THE DAILEY (AND HE WITNISSED ODAS DEATH - THE ONLY PERSON THAT MADE HIM WANT TO CHANGE.) his eyes at the age of 14, and Mori made him live in a shipping container. Obviously he is not gonna feel human after all this.

And about him and chuuya - the thing is they DO CARE ABOUT EACHOTHER. but nobody seems to care about chuuya other than the fact hes hot asf anf the fact that he is ’super mega gay for dazai 🥺🥺🥺’ because are we reading/watching the same series???? There’s SO MUCH to his character too!!!! But all everyone talks about with him is with dazai, chuuyas character is CRAZY WELL WRITTEN and everyone dumbs it down to ‘he’s an angry short boy with a god inside him and he’s mega gay for dazai and he’s also really hot’ like no - stfu he’s not actually super hot headed and it’s CANNON he’s usually pretty calm and collected. On the other side of the coin is that dazai DOES care about him - in Stormbringer ; Dazai literally willing gave Chuuya an option to either use corruption on Verlaine when he used his true form or to retreat and not do it, which gave a sense of Dazai giving Chuuya the choice to do what he wants without forcing him to, and the fact that when Chuuya used corruption, he was being injured badly to the point where Abahabaki was going to destroy Chuuya which FREAKED DAZAI OUT , and the fact that Dazai certainly believes that Chuuya is human shows that Dazai does care about Chuuya in certain ways without showing due to afraid of losing someone he cares about. and In age 15 Dazai, was willing to help Chuuya to find Abahabaki and defeat Rimbaud, along with stormbringer with him helping Chuuya to find out if he's human or not and to defeat Verlaine.

Ty for reading my rant 💞💞💞💞

i can't tell if this is attacking me or just a rant in general but anyway YESSSSS I 100% AGREE YOU ATE W THAT ANALYSIS BRIAR‼️‼️

[kimisamaart]

His song w

This part fits like a glove

It's in Spanish because the song is also in Spanish xd

Translation:

Everyone tells me that I will have a difficult future

That I will bear the cross of being what I could have been

And that perhaps success has knocked on my door

But it seems that I had just left

I'm not afraid of being seen as a failure

Nobody gave me the option of not being born

Don't try to complicate things for me

I'm not going anywhere

[clazaries]

Hi 🤗♥️

I saw that you opened requests for Oscar Isaac and lately I'm in full obsession with Dune

I wanted to see if you would like to write oneshot fluff about Duke Leto x reader.

The duke and his wife have been happily married for years and have a daughter who is just 14 years old.

She is totally daddy's girl, always following him where he goes and seeing him as if her father had hung the same stars, but lately she seems more and more rebellious and distant. Defying his father every chance he gets and being a constant pain in the Duke's mind. Then he and the reader talk about it.

And the duke confesses that he has a great fear of losing his daughter, but the reader reassures him.

It can end however you want (angry or fluffy)

Hope you have a nice day (Sorry if I wrote everything wrong, English is not my native language) ❣️🤗

A small ficlet for you! Thanks for the request!!

"I just...I just don't know what to do," your Duke sighs. You know that whenever your Duke speaks plainly and shows such a lack of restraint of his emotions tells you that you know he has very limited options. "It's like she's going through this god-complex, trying her hardest to make everyone around her feel inferior to her. She has no respect, disobeys every word and lacks responsibility. How am I suppose to manage my own responsibilities when I'm having to make excuses for hers?"

For the last few months it's become common knowledge amongst all those serving under House Atreides that the Duke has been struggling to contain the temperment of his 14 year old daughter, especially those have fallen directly into the firing line of her unsavory behaviour.

As a chambermaid only a few rotations older than the Duke's daughter, it isn't common for you to discuss such matters with the Duke, let alone be in the same room as him, but recently he's begun confiding in you in a way you were never trained for, so your hesitance to help him doesn't go unnoticed. But after seeing how defeated he is sitting on the edge of his bed, looking rather unruly, you decide to chance the same luck. "May I speak plainly, my duke?"

"Please." He looks up to you as if you are the beholder of all wisdom, fingers still tracing the grain of his beard.

"You had lived many rotations before I was even born, so I cannot judge on who you were, but I can speak on who you are now. Everyone knows that you are a leader and a fighter. A good one; even-handed and compassionate. And for that, you have attained Caladan's respect and loyalty. But you are also a father. Her father exclusively. Nobody else on Caladan can share the honour of being your daughter, only her."

His eyes travel over you like he's seeing a side of you he hadn't before, adding to the profile he already has in his head. "It's so curious to me that you are only a few years older than her but yet so vastly different. Why can't I make her see it the way you do?"

Because you've pampered her from the moment she left the womb. Alas, you have more sense to remember what kind of consequences you'd face should you have spoken those words so candidly.

"By blurring the lines of being a leader, a fighter and a father. By letting her see the reason of why you are Duke of Caladan. Gain her respect the same way you did ours. Invite her to House conferences, show her how you train, show her how you handle hostile environments, make her your shadow."

The Duke rises from the edge of the bed with a sigh and saunters over to his wife's vanity, glaring at himself in the mirror. He has a narrow face full of angles and planes, with a high-bridged aquiline nose that gave him the look of a hawk, and woodsmoke in his brown eyes. Despite his intimidating looks, his outer shell doesn't quite reflect what's within. A point that perhaps his daughter has been abusing in recent months.

"I miss the little girl she used to be. I have so much love for her that I can't bear to spare the thought of her not being in my life. I'm scared of losing her. I fear that exposing her to this would put her in harm's way."

"Of course, and she trusts you to protect her as every child does. But what would innocence teach her that you coudn't?"

The Duke's face remains expressionless apart from the very small twitch of his eyebrow furrowing inwards. After a long moment of deliberating, his gaze sweeps to yours through the mirror. You begin to worry that you've stepped out of line.

"Do you think it would work?" He asks quietly.

To be completely honest, you don't know. At the very least, it would do her some good to be humbled.

"It is only advice, my Duke, not an instruction. I would never tell you how to parent your child, I would never disrespect you in that way."

The gentle nod of his head is a relief, and you feel your breath pouring from your lungs.

The Duke paces back over to you, standing just before you that you could feel the traces of his breath sweep across your features.

"Perhaps you are right. When I think about it, I learned most, if not everything from my father when I was a teenager."

A small smile spreads across your lips. "As did I."

The Duke reciprocates the smile, returning his gratitude in the way his hand gently squeezes the top of your arm. "He is a man I aspire to be. Hopefully one day I can be as proud of my daughter as he is of you."

"Thank you, my Duke. I'm sure your daughter will make a great leader one day."

He chuckles softly, "here's hoping she can survive being grouded for longer than a week."

[vigilskeep]

do you have a preference for bethany as a grey warden or circle mage? or does it depend on your hawke?

all bethanys are good bethanys but i’ve come to the conclusion that circle mage bethany will always be first in my heart and i’d LOVE to discuss why

act 1 bethany feels powerless and lonely. she hasn’t had a fellow mage at her side since her father died. she’s caught between guilt at what her family has had to sacrifice for her sake, and resentment that it’s a sacrifice she never even asked them to make. she didn’t choose to be an apostate like her father did. nobody ever gave her the option if she wanted to spend a lifetime on the run, endangering everyone who loves her, rather than accept the world she lives in. she’s a twenty year old who just lost her home and half her family; is it really any wonder that she’s as drawn to the relative stability of a life in the circle as she is afraid of it? a life where she wouldn’t be marked out and isolated, but among people like her, who understand more than even the most well-meaning non mage sibling ever could? why does being born a mage make it her job to fight this, instead of take the life she’s given?

a bethany who goes to the wardens is pushed there by her desperate sibling; a bethany who goes to the circle personally agrees to come willingly, despite hawke’s protests. it’s a minimal but very defining change in agency. her experience in the circle, too, is what she makes of it. we see little of the life she builds there, but she is clearly able to excel and be recognised for her own merits; even if it weren’t mentioned in her dialogue how impressed they are with her training, and in her letters how she has taken on the role of helping with the young initiates who also in game clearly look up to her, we constantly see her at the first enchanter’s right hand. bethany’s circle mage dialogue in the dlcs—some of the best dialogue in the game, imo—makes it clear that not fighting the circle is a choice she’s made. she tells anders, “i’m not leashed”, “i can pretend to be miserable if you want, but i’m not”. she tells aveline, “life is what i need it to be.” if hawke offers to help her escape, she says the circle is comfortable... for now. she’s smart, she’s capable of defying and deceiving the templars when required, and she’s making her own decision to do her best within the circle and see what comes of it. maybe it’s not healthy for her to give in to her imprisonment. in protective older sibling mode, i hate to see her talk like that about the mistreatment and danger she faces, as if it’s acceptable. but what both hawke and bethany can get from the circle mage route is that her life outside the circle can’t really be freedom either until it’s her choice

in the circle mage route, bethany can’t be badgered into learning her own self-worth by well-meaning lecturers. she has to learn from her own experiences, and choose the mages’ fight on her own terms. thematically, i think it’s one of the most compelling thoughts on the topic of the circle that da2 has to offer: someone with an open mind experiencing it, being grateful in some aspects for what it offers, exploring that it may not be as bad as some apostates fear and it may be possible to salvage a life from it, but still absolutely ultimately learning from it that mages deserve more. she says so outright: that her time in the circle is what she needed to “see the need to free my fellow mages”. not just learning the value of the life she once had and her own freedom, but taking up an active purpose that also brings into play the community she gained from the circle. it’s a brilliant, nuanced arc for her and it makes me so so proud. it also makes you see the chantry explosion with a distinct perspective and in, i think, its best light: as a call to action that sharpens the battle lines into focus, and acts as the final catalyst to let mages see what’s necessary past their fear. for me it’s hard to imagine what i couldn’t justify, watching my little sister finally believe her freedom is worth fighting for

narratively, it’s my favourite route for hawke’s overall story as well. bethany going to the circle defines the stakes of da2, with meredith’s sword permanently at your little sister’s throat, creating a desperate tone no other type of playthrough can offer. the warden route on the other hand distances her from the story, making her cameos feel sudden and stilted. the conclusion of da2 is very much about circle mage bethany, both her life and her way of life on the line, hawke finally able to defend or take up arms against the last of their family. by contrast, when grey warden bethany shows up to take whatever side hawke does, it gives the impression to me that she’s only talking like she’s completed a character arc during the last straw because, well, the writers know this is where the game ends. we don’t see or earn her progress. the circle mage bethany route also feels like hawke’s choices are really challenged, rather than hawke making an executive decision to “save” bethany in yet another way she didn’t ask for, and then basically waiting until she comes around to it and apologises for being mad

that being said, i adore bethany getting to fully express her bitterness and anger as a warden, and i think her hatred of that path makes her one of the most interesting warden characters in the entire series. it also involves her unlearning her repression of her negative feelings, a repression which absolutely continues to be at play in the way she defends her life in the circle and downplays its horrors for the sake of those that love her. the warden route definitely has its merits. also her warden staff does fire damage which is LITERALLY her thing why tf does her circle mage staff do nature damage i hate it here genuinely

[moreespressoformydepresso]

Guess who started plagiarizing their own AU’s?

I got another fix-it with ✨angst✨ because I was thinking about how much Nero Price hates the districts for forcing him and his family into cannibalism and it made me think: “if starvation made him hate them, could it make them start to fight for them?” And then I thought about my starvation fix-it AU (featuring @spiralling-thoughts) and this was born.

Instead of the starvation happening before the games, it happens during the games, which takes place about a week or two later than it was supposed to due to rebel activity (read: Sejanus and a few good mentors fucking shit up for Gaul). The premise here is simple: these extra weeks gave the tributes the time to bond (and also none of them died because Sejanus Does Not Agree With That) and now none of them can stomach killing one another. So what’s the other option? Uhm… waiting until fate decides the victor? So once they’re finally thrown into the arena and the buzzer sounds they run into the tunnels like they did in canon (but with more kids), but the big difference is that nobody gets out. Some get a weapon just to be safe but the few kids that run into one another don’t really do anything. Think the Foxface-Katniss interaction at the start of the 74th Hunger Games. Lucky tries to get everyone hyped up every single time only to be sorely disappointed when they stare each other down only to sprint in the opposite direction mere seconds later.

At first, Gaul isn’t particularly bothered by how hilariously she’s being proven wrong because they can just starve out the tributes and surely they’ll start swinging at each other soon enough right? This might even be better than how things usually go! Except then the kids start to notice some are getting more food than others and they’re not about that. Coral sharing with Mizzen and Tanner is written off by their alliance, but then things start escalating. It starts with Lamina calling a clearly starved Wovey over and giving her all except two of her food packets. Then Lucy Gray and Jessup (who does not have rabies and neither does Reaper because Brandy (who is in the pack with Coral and Not Dead) threw the rabbid raccoon away a little further) trade their water for Sol and Hy’s food. Treech considers stealing Dill’s food and water but decides to help her consume it instead and somehow this keeps Dill from dying (Felix. The answer is Felix. He used his presidential family card to sneak antibiotics into her water bottles). Then before anyone knows it the tributes are all keeping tabs on who’s eaten what and they start rationing out so everyone gets the food they need. The older kids tells the younger ones that they’re deliberately feeding them more because growing you know? But the Capitol sure notices. When we get to day five, Gaul decides that enough is enough and orders a full stop to all sponsor gifts to try and force the tributes to start killing each other.

They do no such thing.

Instead, they start doubling down on their decision to stick this thing out together and start catching any rodents they can to feed to the youngest kids while ignoring the slowly growing hunger within them. Do those Capitol bastards really think they can get to them with starvation? Please, this is their daily jam. They’ve gotten this far, a little hunger won’t break them now. So they wait. They wait and they survive. It gets harder and harder for the older tributes, who are allowing themselves to starve for the sake of their younger companions and are slowly running out of fuel to keep going, but not once do they comply with what they know the Capitol wants from them. At some point it becomes pure shared spite more than anything.

Meanwhile, the Capitol citizens watch this go down and have their view of the world shaken up considerably. These kids know just a little too much about dealing with extreme food shortage for this to be their first rodeo. The delusion that the districts haven’t suffered as much as the Capitol did during the siege is completely shattered when the kids start sharing their best starvation cope tactics that make it clear this is a regular occurrence for them. Slowly, more and more information is shown to them as they watch the kids they saw as violent beasts be nothing but caring and kind to one another. It hits especially hard for the Price family, who spent so much time loathing the districts for their decision to resort to cannibalism only to find out that the Capitol has pushed the districts right to that edge for years. How can they call themselves better when they’ve done the exact same thing they resent the districts for? When they’ve arguably done worse because they’re punishing innocents? That last line of thinking becomes particularly unavoidable when the younger kids start taking up more screentime. Why do they do this? Because the older tributes are starting to succumb to starvation. They all look skeletal and half-dead, but the oldest tributes have given up so much food that it’s clear they can barely move. They do a good job of hiding it around the younger kids but once they’re out of sight under the guise of searching for more insects and rodents to eat they collapse and curl up to fight off the hunger pangs. When the young kids are asleep all the older ones clearly sag as their energy depletes. It reminds the Capitol citizens of how they’d hide their fatigue and physical deterioration from their kids and loved ones, desperate to hold it together, only to break down once they were alone.

When the first tribute stops being able to move, the Capitol has had enough. Perhaps Marcus, Coral, and Reaper scream their lungs out at the camera over the hypocrisy and cruelty and then mockingly asking the Capitol what they’re gonna do about this show of rebellion. This refusal to fight. Starve them? Kill them? What more can they do?! That’s the final straw. The more sympathetic citizens refuse to watch for even a second longer. They do the one thing the Capitol feared:

They rebel

Maybe they force the government to get the kids out. Maybe they get some peacekeepers on their side and storm the arena first to make sure not one more innocent life is lost. Either way, they realize that silence isn’t any better than being the monster. Seeing suffering and standing by is just as cruel as causing that suffering in the first place. If they storm the arena they bring easily digestible food and liquid calories to avoid refeeding syndrome or nausea from overeating so they can start helping the kids readjust and heal. Of course there’s a lot of distrust from the kids at first, but they’re in no position to refuse food. So they take it, and for once the oldest kids don’t mind eating first because who knows what these Capitol assholes put in it? Of course it turns out it’s not poisoned so they start to accept it a little more openly while the politics are handed and arrangements are made to get the kids back home. Gaul tries to stop this, but nobody listens to her anymore. Her lab’s destroyed under “mysterious circumstances” and as her career comes to a fiery end, she herself does too. When legal repercussions for her heinous actions is threatened by the parents of several academy students she endangered, she attempts to flee the country. What chance of winning does she have when one of the litigants is President Ravinstill himself??? Felix was a little upset about Dill’s pain and he wasn’t about to let it slide but since persecuting her for the hunger games wouldn’t work due to law changes not working retroactively this was the next best thing. Either way, certain people (the mentors) caught wind of the fact that this vile monster of a woman was trying to escape the consequences of her actions and they decided to remain one step ahead by becoming the mysterious circumstances credited with her disappearance. By which I mean she came to a slow death in her home. Possibly through invisible toxic gas, possibly through burning to death, possibly through her own predator muttations given her scent to hunt down. Who knows? Better question is who cares? The mentors have become closer to their tributes and their friendships last well beyond the fixing of all the problems in this mess of a country and all’s well that ends well.

[lindszeppelin]

This is may sound weird, but stay with me. I've been re-watching some of the press tour interviews with Jodie and Austin. I feel like in some way being around Jodie has opened Austin's eyes even more to what he could have in a romantic partner. Not saying he's into Jodie or he wants to date her. We knew he was having doubts about Kaia right around the time the press tour started. But the way he was so impressed with Jodie. The way he could so easily smile and laugh with Jodie. It was such a natural chemistry. They were fun to watch.

Look, I don't pretend to know how Kaia and Austin act with each other in private. But it doesn't transfer well publicly. I've never gotten the sense of any chemistry between them. There is no passion, love, or anything really. With Vanessa even in their pap walks, you could feel the love between them. Kaia and him are just sterile.

This interview in particular https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PiKQ6kbhfPY

He seems so enamored by Jodie and the work she did in the movie. I think this is what that L&S article was referring to, as someone on his level. I can see him continuing to date other actresses. But it will be someone who actually is good at their craft. Someone with maturity. Who can carry on a conversation and is smart and witty.

I think in terms of being the "supportive boyfriend" Austin probably sweet. But you know deep down he doesn't take Kaia's work in Bottoms or Palm Royale seriously. There is an entire Reddit thread dedicated to how awful Kaia was in AHS. She's not on his level. Austin wants someone on his level as his status continues to rise.

Being attached to a nepo baby isn't helping his image.

This was a great message, anon! I love when you guys go in depth with your takes and share your opinions. That's what we're here for. He has so much reverence for Jodie and people like Jodie that take acting just as seriously as he does. Austin was not born into the industry. Acting wasn't even something he thought about doing until he was put in a position when he was young to give is a go. The option was presented to him and he saw it as a way to step out of his comfort zone and explore parts of himself in the characters he plays. That's why he takes acting so seriously. He studies it like it's a true fine art, as if he's getting a Masters or PhD y'know. He's worked with Howard Fine, he took classes, he learned in his free time. That is dedication. It's not just about a paycheck for him. It's not about "I wanna be famous". For him it's clearly about telling stories, and being apart of something that will last forever.

Elvis is a perfect example of this, because he thought nobody would remember him when he died because he didn't make a movie that he thought was worth while and important. But even with the shitty scripts they gave him, he still busted his ass and did everything he could to make it a great movie. You can tell when someone is in it for the fame/connections/money versus when someone is in it for the love of acting. And it means more for someone like Austin who didn't grow up in a wealthy family in Hollywood with connected parents to the industry and whatnot. It was all grassroots hard work. And when people like that do become famous it either consumes them in a bad way, or they don't take their life for granted. Austin is one of those people that doesn't take anything for granted. You can tell he doesn't live by his fame status symbol. He lives pretty much well within his means, and he acts like a normal guy.

So, long rant short, someone like Kaia who clearly does not work on film sets with that same dedication and seriousness as compared to Austin, it's hard to find anything to talk about or any commonality between them. It's all just a means to an end for her. It's all superficial. That man is so deep and connected to feelings and emotions and the human condition. And she knows how to work her image in her favor. The incompatibility is astounding. Maybe he had hopes for her in the beginning, but as time went on he saw she was not as serious about the things that actually mattered to him.

[spookymultimedia]

I'm so sorry that you have to have a body

Cartman, as an intersex boy, tries to explain how he feels about the parts of his body that were surgically changed when he was a baby.

Cartman was in bed hugging his pillow close to his chest when Kyle walked into his room. The front door was unlocked and so he and Stan just walked up to Cartman’s room to see what he was up to and if he wanted to throw rocks at the ice at Stark Pond. Cartman was curled into himself like a little pill bug, facing the wall.

“Hey, fatass.” Kyle approached his bed.

“Fuck off.” Cartman mumbled between sniffles.

“Dude are you crying?”

Cartman hid his face into his pillow to muffle his tears, it didn't work though.

“What's wrong?” asked Stan

and

Cartman just hid under his blankets.

“What?? Tell us.” Kyle hopped into Cartman's bed shook him, “Come on, talk to us!” Cartman tried to kick him off the bed with no success. He crawled on top of Cartman, “The fuck is wrong with you?”

Cartman scowled at him. He didn't not like being touched by Kyle, but he was all lame and pathetic right now so he didn't want Kyle to see him like that.

“It's personal.”

“Okay and?” Kyle cocked his head. He scoffed at Kyle. He pushed him off and sat up.

“ . . . .I'm still thinking about what my Mom told me last week.”

“Oh, is this about your pee pee?”

“Grow up Kyle nobody calls it that!” He rubbed his eyes and tried to wipe his nose with his nose. Stan joined Kyle in bed.

“So it is about your pee pee?”

“Yes it's about my junk! God.”

“My Mom told me that Kyle's Mom told her that you had surgery as a baby and it was bad for some reason,” said Stan

“It's dehumanizing that's what.” He mumbled through his shakey tears.

“Stop crying, we can't understand you!” said Kyle

Cartman just growled at him and gently kicked him on the arm.

“It still bothers you? The surgery?”

“I hate my body,” he croaked out.

Kyle looked sadly at him, he genuinely sounded in pain.

“It's okay if you have a tiny dick. We're just joking around when we say that, it's not a big deal.”

“It's not even a dick! It doesn't look anything like a fucking dick! Its-,” he hiccuped, “It's just this weird looking mound of flesh that they just forced to be there!” He broke out into tears and looked down towards the bed.

“I'm sorry.” Kyle petted his back. A weird warm feeling filled his chest when he did that, it felt nice. “You know, they have cool prosthetics now. I heard about this guy who got his dick chopped off in the war-”

“Which war?” Stan interrupted.

“It doesn't matter! Anyway, his dick got sliced off and after that he started wearing this fake dick in his pants so he could look normal! You could have one too.” Kyle smiled at him.

“Normal?” He gave Kyle a dirty look.

“Like, I get it, it sucks not being born with a normal dick and there's nothing you can do about it but at least you can look a little normal with a fake one.”

“NO KYLE YOU DON'T FUCKING GET IT!” he snapped, “I DON'T WANT A NORMAL DICK I WANT DOCTORS TO KEEP THEIR FUCKING HANDS OFF MY FUCKING BODY!!”

Kyle flinched, “Jesus Christ, okay, I'm sorry dude.”

“Then what do you want your body to look like?” asked Stan

“ I WANT to be how I was BORN!! But I can't. My Mom took the fucking option away from me. It's not fair!! I'm sick and tired of people trying to tell me how I should feel about my body! IT'S MINE!! Those fucking libt*rds say shit like ‘It's my body my my choice’ but when it comes to MINE I don't get a fucking choice!”

“Cartman. . .”

He laid in bed and screamed at the top of his lungs into a pillow.

“You wanna throw rocks at Starks Pond and see if the ice will crack?” asked Stab.

Cartman quietly looked up at Stan. He sat up and blew his nose on a tissue before wiping his eyes.

“Yeah, I do.”

“Finally!! Let's go!” Kyle shot out of the bed and ran to the door. Cartman slowly got out of bed and put on a sweater and coat over his shirt.

“Eric?”

Cartman looked at him and raised an eyebrow.

Stan opened his arms out for a hug. Cartman walked to him and dropped into his arms. Stan was already growing and towered over Cartman. Cartman hid his face in his friend's chest, hugging his waist. Stan awkwardly hugged him back. They made their way down and found Kyle with a wagon full of rocks that Kenny walked over with.

“DUDE!!” Cartman's face lit up “These are fucking huge!! We're totally gonna break the ice!!”

“I got dibs on the big one!!” Kyle shouted.

“Ey!! That's not fair!”

They ran off to the lake and did their usual bullshit. Kenny fell into the lake while sliding a hunk of concrete onto the ice, of course.

[obscurori]

A Really Really Long Shang Tsung Tangent

HIIIIIIIIIII ~ <3

I've mentioned it on another post but I feel like getting it out there with more explanation. This is my first sort of think piece or character analysis I'm posting publicly so bear with me lol.

The TLDR is there are villains, there are people who are bad, and there are people that could do better but have a lot of trouble doing so. Not all of them are disordered or have something afflicting their decision making. But Shang Tsung, in my mind and given all the factors, is a villain with ASPD/Anti-social personality disorder.

While ASPD can contribute to what is medically considered 'psychopathy' and 'sociopathy', and from my anecdotal experience those who experience ASPD do not shy from the words, I personally will only be referring to the disorder itself.

I also got a comment about how much of this is him being disordered and how much of is a choice. I want to make it absolutely clear, while my theory of his tendencies stand, all his actions in the game are his choices nonetheless.

I still clown on him for not being able to just grin and bear the cards dealt to him and/or make a friend because... yeah he really just should have. This ramble is me acknowledging that many villains don't fit the description of ASPD, but he's one that definitely is rife with enabled anti-social behavior.

I think a lot about the second chance Liu Kang gave him. The parallels they gave Shang Tsung and Raiden are evident. People born in small pockets of their world, unassuming and uneventful until someone of great power (titans, no less) approach them with a task.

The difference is how they handle it. What is there to handle? Well... a lot, if you have as severe problems with empathy and collaborating with the rules of society as Shang Tsung does. His pre-game biography lists him as 'too lazy for labor' and 'too shifty for honest work', but he can work hard for the right promises as is evident in the game.

Gritting his teeth and doing the work handed to him would have been easier. While Outworld has its issues (prominently, the remnants of the royal's imperialist stand-offs and the ableism that looms in various Outworld characters' narratives), the general wellbeing of the working class doesn't seem to be one of them. But as a huckster, he's isolated, consistently having to rely on his lies, and receiving the consequences.

To be honest, I don't think Shang Tsung didn't try. I can believe it not working out very fast, but I don't think he simply ignored that standard work is out there. He can be arrogant and bratty, but he doesn't dilute his options.

Symptoms of ASPD such as lack of empathy, ignorance to the result of his actions, and disinterest in performing standard work/social obligations are already evident, and would impede on his life whether he is a powerful sorcerer or a nobody. These impact any friendships he could have, his impulse control, and how he regards anyone up to and including himself (who he deems untrustworthy).

But we are social people that want to feel, want to be happy. Anti-social behavior isn't extreme introversion, in fact many people with ASPD are very extraverted and social. It's less about being around people and more about the reactions they're capable of while with said people.

Not all villains have a disorder, obviously. Some have motivations deemed reasonable, and some are just delightfully evil. Shang Tsung starts off very disordered and not entirely villainous, though hardly good. He was someone who couldn't do what people around him thought was so straightforward.

He's in distress over his life as a scammer, but not really how it impacts others. He's unable to connect to them and has a sense of grandeur over them, but honestly most people are doing better than he can. People, to him, are inherently isolating and alienating. He's aware this isn't normal, and can only answer to it with apathy and more lies.

Most people with ASPD don't go in for that diagnosis. They do so because of comorbidities: mood disorders like depression and bi-polar, anxiety disorders such as OCD, and other personality disorders such as BPD. I do think this would have been the case for Shang Tsung as well, if Outworld was a sort of place that would pick these things out about him, but it isn't.

Damashi's approach is so glaring to me as a result. I can make all the wet cat jokes in the world, but it is sad to me that he cannot process the consequences of his actions, only that he is forced to feel them. He expects so badly out of others that he doesn't bother giving them anything good or better from him, which gets him punished, and the cycle starts all over. That's what he figures the woman is about to do.

And that woman could have been anyone. That's already the lesson there, as she is Titan Shang Tsung in disguise. He was given the right words by someone equally manipulative and was just as vulnerable to tricks, lies, and abuse as anyone else would be in his position.

You gotta remember, if she was there just to pummel him into a pulp, he was about to let her.

His decision to follow her is one of desperation and likely depression. Depression manifests differently to those who find themselves alienated, and do not understand people's sympathy and overt emotional responses.

From my anecdotal research, there's a set of words that come up a lot that doesn't show up on many articles or bullet points about ASPD. Numbness and boredom. It's not a normal boredom where you can occupy yourself with an activity or friends. It is a complete lapse of emotional connection and stimulation. If you aren't angry, you are bored. If you aren't bored, you are numb.

Which moves us into the topic of: sensation chasing.

"Damashi" teaches him real sorcery, and what ensues is his development into the conniving and cruel Shang Tsung we know and dread. A true testament to Shang Tsung's wit and manipulative tendencies, along with this new position dissolving his impulse control. Now that he isn't held down by a lack of magic, he treats people like objects toward his greater goals with even less regard than he had in the first place.

Good L-rd you are short.

People are the subject of his curiosity and how he chases off his boredom susceptibility. "Damashi" has a plan set in stone, but Shang Tsung's horrific laboratory is unrelated to "her" demands. The lab isn't just dedicated to his own research, but his sense of morbid novelty. He can already manipulate and use people - creating hybrids out of those already existing is a very "because I can" thing.

Syzoth is one of Shang Tsung's biggest victims of this. Shang Tsung exerts control of him first for his shapeshifting, but proceeds to keep him around and hang his family over his head... because he can. And because he can, he thinks it better to do so. But the more time he kept Syzoth in the cold, cruel, and dark, the more chances he was giving him to fight back or sabotage Shang Tsung - something that ends up happening.

Shang Tsung killed Syzoth's family very early into this. Perhaps even the day the Syzoth agreed to stay in the lab. What does he get out of hiding that? Perhaps it was a sort of inside joke, a chuckle he got with each and every visit. It wasn't for control, and it wasn't to get anything out of Syzoth besides a reaction. He gave himself something by doing it this way, no matter how cruel it was to Syzoth.

There's a lot of other examples obviously about how Shang Tsung treats the people around him, but I think that one's the most important to get out of the way. This post's long enough already.

More evidence of Shang Tsung having ASPD is his primary motive: revenge against Liu Kang. Shang Tsung doesn't dare question why he couldn't fit into a normal life, he only applies new faces to the life he detested and blames them for his problems. Taking responsibility and accountability would mean processing his social faults and how to improve them... something he absolutely refused to do.

When Shang Tsung is faced with "Damashi"'s true identity, he's more angry about being manipulated and outsmarted than any of the plans falling through. He's told, to his face, he isn't the best or smartest. He was a tool, running errands while being conspired against. Instead of registering that and empathizing with the people he used before this reveal, it fuels his internalized cruelty.

When he collaborates with Liu Kang's crew, he clearly tries to suck up to Kuai Liang and even Raiden. But these are people that run on empathy. Caring about people as a whole and having faith in them doesn't mesh with Shang Tsung's view that this whole world runs on fraudulent transactions. In that moment, he fits in with the people around him just as poorly as he did while running a travel cart.

Alan Lee, the voice actor of Shang Tsung, mentions that "Damashi" approached Shang Tsung with a cheat code to life so potent that it makes Shang Tsung determined to own up to his depravity. He describes him as a "madman with pandora's box, mixed with a child to the keys to candyland." He's unpredictable, not just by standard villainy, but because nothing else has appealed to him in life.

Now that Shang Tsung has burned nearly every bridge he had, he wants to own up to that. Because to him, the only other option is the quiet. Boredom. That numbness again. If he spent any longer in that travel cart, he may have frankly committed suicide out of the sheer droll.

He will lie, steal, and carve his way into and out of any problem as he was enabled to under Titan Shang Tsung, and in a way has initiated a new, sad reality of chasing that Titan's shadow.

[thruheavenandhighwater]

Pairing: Eddie Munson/ Female Soulmate

Requested By: NA (inspired by a post I saw months ago but can't find now. If it's your post or you have the link to it, please let me know so that I can give proper credit for the idea)

Word Count: 3,751

Summary: Soulmate AU. Every person is born with a tattoo of the sounds they'll hear when they meet their soulmate.

Stranger Things Masterlist Eddie Munson Masterlist

~~~~~

Birds. 

Fuckin birds. That's all she had to go on. She'd hear birds of all things. What a lousy tattoo. It did make her feel slightly better, though, knowing her soulmate would have the same thing to work with. The same thing being, essentially, nothing. 

She heard birds every single day. How on earth was she supposed to know which birds were the right ones? Which birds would be the ones who's songs told her that's him. That's your soulmate. 

The people in her life told her that it would be easy. They all said she'd "just know." But nobody could tell her how. Nobody could tell her what happened when the right birds were singing at the right time. It frustrated her beyond reason whenever she'd let herself think about it. So, she did everything she could not to think about it. 

She kept herself busy with work as much as they'd let her. Picking up shifts, covering when the other waitresses had to leave, even working holidays to avoid the questions from her family. But when work wasn't an option, she could always turn to art. Drawing, specifically. 

The pages of her sketchbooks were full of random drawings from her day to day. She drew anything and everything that caught her attention. Flowers, shop windows, dogs in the park, strangers in line at the coffee shop. It didn't matter to her what it was, if it caught her eye at a moment that she was able to draw it, it was added to her collection. 

She enjoyed finding beauty in the mundane. Her tattoo had taught her to appreciate the smallest moments in life. She knew that she'd hear birds at the moment she met her soulmate. When she was a teenager she began to listen to the birds more closely. She learned to identify their different songs. Crows, robins, blue jays, cardinals. But her favorite song was that of the love bird. It was cliche, and she knew that. But she loved it nonetheless. Her father had joked that if she got good enough at knowing different bird calls, maybe her tattoo would suddenly change. "Tomorrow you'll wake up and it'll say 'warbler.'" he laughed over dinner. 

She'd spent time admiring her parents' tattoos when she was younger. She loved the simplicity of them. "Ocean" in the plain black ink of their wrists. It was funny, they'd say. Neither of them ever liked the beach. Her mother hated that the sand stuck to everything. Her father was prone to sunburn. But when both of their families had dragged them along on a beach vacation some 25 years ago, they found each other. 

It had become more or less a weekly ritual for her to set up at a local cafe on Monday mornings. She'd order her regular, a dirty chai latte and whichever pastry looked extra delicious that day. The baristas on shift would ask about her week, and tell her about theirs before she'd go out front to her favorite patio table. It sat in the corner of the patio, right beside the black metal fence around the perimeter. It was far enough from the door that she could draw and sketch uninterrupted, and gave a perfect view of the street and the neighborhood. 

This particular Monday morning had gotten off to a rocky start. She'd woken up later than she'd wanted. She didn't have a specific schedule per se, but she liked to be at the cafe early. Then the clouds overhead started to turn an angry, dark shade of grey as she walked down the street. She tucked her sketchbook tighter to her chest, hoping the clouds would be merciful today and not rain on her. 

A breath of relief fell from her mouth, cheeks puffing dramatically as she shut the cafe door behind her. "Looks nasty out there," she told the barista, Amber, with a smile. 

"Uh oh," She answered, her eyes going to the window. "Are you still gonna sit outside?" 

She was at the counter now, her wallet out and ready to pay. She looked outside at the dark sky. It hadn't rained yet. 

"Think I'll take my chances," she answered with a smile. And so she did. She collected her breakfast from Amber and made her way to her favorite table. Amber offered to bring out an umbrella if the skies began to look worse. 

Once she was sat at her table, she suddenly didn't notice the storm clouds above her. All of her focus, all of her energy, was on her sketchbook. She'd look up briefly now and then to find new inspiration. But as soon as something worthy caught her eye, her nose was buried once again in the off white pages. 

Hours had passed before she realized. Mondays were often like that. After ordering another drink, she flipped to a new page in her sketchbook. Her pages were often filled with small, unrelated and unconnected pieces. Flowers from the market right next to a mailbox she saw on her walk. A kitten that had been for sale at a garage sale the previous weekend, its ear nearly touching an old mechanics sign that hung on an abandoned building down the street from her house. She liked the randomness of it all, but she loved starting a new page even more. The crisp, untouched paper was full of nothing but potential. It was exhilarating. 

She noticed that the clouds began to shift only when the sunlight began to fall across the page of her book. The paper that had been a dull, almost sad shade of white suddenly illuminated in warm gold. She glanced up from the paper, taking a quick look at the sky above her. It seemed as though mother nature would be on her side. You could never be sure about weather in Indiana in March, but the tides seemed to be turning. And she couldn't be more glad. 

She picked up her bag from where it sat beside her feet. She just knew there had to be a pair of sunglasses in there somewhere. When her desperate attempts to locate the cheap plastic sunglasses failed, she groaned loudly to herself. She looked up, turning to her left, then to her right. 

When her head snapped a bit too quickly to the right, she suddenly didn't care about sunglasses. She didn't care that the bright afternoon sun had been hurting her eyes just ten seconds ago. The moment she saw him, she didn't care about anything. 

~~~~~

Blood will follow blood.

It was without a doubt the most metal soulmate tattoo he'd ever seen. Every other person Eddie was close to had boring tattoos. Traffic or bells. But his? He took pride in his. 

He'd tried more than a handful of times to write songs with those words. Heavy guitars, deep vocals. He had a fantasy, a dream that one day he'd write the perfect song. He'd play it at a show and that was when he'd meet her. His soulmate. He'd be sweaty from performing, she'd be beautiful and in awe of his musical genius. But so far, any time he tried to write that perfect song, the words fell flat. They weren't his to write, he supposed. 

He spent countless hours wondering what the words on his wrist meant. His first thought, obviously, was that they had to be song lyrics. But  he'd listened to countless records in his time, and he couldn't find them anywhere. His next bet was that it could be Dungeons and Dragons related. The game could get violent at times. It wasn't uncommon for him, or any other Dungeon Master he knew, to be gratuitous in their descriptions during a campaing. 

That took up most of his time, if he were honest. Being a Dungeon Master served as a perfect distraction during his last few years of high school. When everyone else around him was hooking up, biding their time until their actual soulmate arrived, he was nose deep in dungeon manuals and campaign writing. It didn't feel right to him to entertain anyone who wasn't his soulmate, so he didn't. 

The only thing that came close in terms of time spent as a distraction was baking. Eddie Munson made the best brownies in Hawkins. Anyone who had ever tried his baked goods would tell you, that boy had a gift. It had started after he moved in with his uncle. He'd found an old box of cake mix in the back of a cabinet and begged his uncle to make it for him. When uncle Wayne said no, not because he didn't want to, but because he was pretty sure it was expired, 12 year old rebel Eddie did not take his advice. The cake was awful. Absolutely disgusting. So, during his next grocery trip uncle Wayne bought two more boxes of cake mix. He taught Eddie what little he knew about doctoring up a boxed mix to make it even more delicious, and the rest was history. 

Eddie did what he could to get his hands on as many cookbooks as he could. He'd borrow from neighbors, the public library, he even got sweet old Mrs. Conley's from two doors down to give him her secret family cookie recipe. The secret, it turned out, was browned butter. Once he started, he really couldn't stop.

He'd spend hours in the tiny kitchen of his uncle's house mixing and measuring and baking. Once he'd gotten down the basics, cookies, cakes, brownies, even cinnamon rolls that would knock your tits clean off, he started to experiment. Poor, sweet uncle Wayne was more often than not the test subject for his creations. They weren't all great at first, but Wayne loved his nephew. He loved his curiosity. He loved that the little boy who'd been dropped on his step with two changes of clothes and nobody in the world was finally starting to shine. So he'd eat every single terrible thing Eddie ever baked with a smile. Well, he'd try to at least. He did eventually have to tell him that quadrupling the amount of cocoa powder in a brownie recipe was maybe not his best idea to date. 

But now, at 20 years old he considered himself something of a professional in the kitchen. He'd come home to the small house he still shared with his uncle and immediately start. If there was already a pan of brownies, or half a batch of snickerdoodles left from a few days before he'd take them to Max and Susan across the road. Max seemed to appreciate them. And he'd start again. He'd bake something delicious for dessert and make whatever he could find for dinner. Neither he or his uncle were necessarily great cooks but Eddie could make a mean pot of hamburger helper. 

Some nights, Wayne would wake up early and the men would have dinner together. They'd take streaming plates of whatever Eddie made into the living room, plates set on their laps while they watched reruns of Bonanza or Gilligan's Island. But more often, Eddie would cook and eat alone in his bedroom while he did homework or messed around with whatever song he was working on that week. Either way, he'd always pack up the leftovers and dessert into the old blue playmate that served as Wayne's lunchbox for work. 

Everything Eddie did had a soundtrack. Driving, baking, planning campaigns, even just sitting at home. He always had music playing. He loved anything he could get his hands on, but his favorite was metal. Any genre of metal. Black metal, thrash metal, speed metal, stoner metal. He loved it all. And even if a band wasn't his favorite, he appreciated them. He was a music fan above all else. 

This particular weekend had been an exciting one for him. He'd managed to take out the entire party at the previous week's Hellfire campaign on Friday. Then yesterday, Sunday, he finally perfected his recipe for chocolate cupcakes. He was feeling on top of the world, always one to appreciate the little things in life. He packed up half a dozen of his cupcakes into a Tupperware container and set off towards downtown.

He parked outside of the RadioShack downtown. Today was finally the day that one of Eddie's favorite bands would be releasing their new album. Master of Puppets. Even if he didn't already love Metallica, he'd have been hooked by the album name. He was surprised that a big chain like RadioShack carried this kind of music, really. But he supposed that in capitalist America, a dollar was a dollar. And Metallica definitely made the stores that carried their music money. 

"Bob around?" He asked a bored looking middle aged man behind the counter as he walked into the store. The man barely acknowledged Eddie as he pointed his thumb towards the back of the store. Eddie nodded as he walked away, heading towards the bright red and white sign that read "Customer Service" at the back of the store. 

Bob Newby was, among other things, the general manager of the store. Eddie liked him the first day he came in after the store had opened. Most people looked at Eddie and saw trouble. Leather and tattoos would have that effect in a town like Hawkins. But not Bob. Bob greeted Eddie with a real Newby smile and a firm handshake. He learned Eddie's name and interests quickly, always paying attention when they spoke instead of waiting for him to do something terrible like most people in town seemed to do. 

"Mornin', Ed." Bob greeted as he got closer to the counter. 

"You got it?" Eddie asked. He came to a stop on the opposite side of the counter from Bob, the chain on his jeans hitting the front of it loudly as his fingers landed on the edge of the counter. 

"Yes," Bob chuckled, reaching behind him. "I have it." 

He handed the shrink wrapped cassette to Eddie. He thanked Bob with a giddy smile before turning back towards the bored man holding down the checkout counter. He admired the artwork of the cassette. The silver Metallica logo over rows and rows of white crosses. He flipped it over in his hands, excited eyes quickly scanning the tracklist on the back. He could hardly wait to get it into the tape deck in his van. 

Once he was comfortably in his van with the newest addition to his music collection playing on the radio, he set his sights on the Henderson house. Dustin Henderson had been a freshman Hellfire recruit when he met Eddie, and he'd never admit it to the others, but his favorite. He took a liking to the round faced kid immediately. He was already smarter than Eddie at barely 14 and had the quickest wit of anyone in Hawkins. 

Eddie passed a small cafe on his way. It was a warm, simple place owned by the parents of a kid Eddie had gone to high school with. Their pastries were nothing compared to Eddie's, but they made a great cup of coffee. He decided to stop in quickly and grab something to go. 

He removed the cassette from the tape deck, quickly placing it into his walkman. He decided to start side two of the cassette, placing it into the walkman upside down. He placed his headphones over his ears and pressed play as he swung open the door of his van. 

He wasn't paying much attention to his surroundings as he walked up the sidewalk towards the cafe. His eyes focused on his shoes as he dug his hands deep into the pockets of his faded blue jeans, suddenly cognizant of the rips and frays across his knees as a chilled March breeze blew. 

The warmth inside the cafe was welcome as the door closed behind him. There was a bit of a line, which was to be expected at this time of morning. He took his place in line behind an older man and turned up the volume in his headphones. The line moved slowly as the tape played in his ears. It was good. Like, really fucking good. He always loved Metallica but this album was new levels. 

The fourth song started as the older man in front of him placed his order. He stopped the tape as he walked up to the counter, pulling his wallet from his back pocket. 

"Large black house blend," he ordered with a smile. "Please." He added quickly. The woman behind the counter told him his total with a grin. He paid, dropping his change into the tip jar beside the register while she poured his coffee. She placed a plastic lid on the cup and handed it to him over the counter. He placed his headphones back over his ears before taking the cup. 

He pressed play on his walkman as he walked through the cafe, through the front door and back into the chilly air outside. He walked down the sidewalk, past a few patio tables that were set up outside. Just as he was passing through the black metal fence that surrounded the tables when he heard it. 

Go against the grain until the end Blood will follow blood Dying time is here Damage incorporated

He stopped in his tracks. He swore he lost all feeling in his hands as he heard the words. He turned around, hair flying around his head as his eyes scanned his surroundings. 

As soon as his eyes met hers he suddenly didn't hear the guitars in his ears. The drums faded into background noise. The only thing he could see, the only person that existed in this moment was her. And she was beautiful beyond words. 

~~~~~

She stood from her seat, tugging down the hem of her shirt while she smiled at him. His own beaming grin was, for lack of a better word, breathtaking. A rosy blush bloomed across dimpled cheeks, his brown eyes like honey beneath the sun of early spring. Another chilly breeze blew around the two of them, kicking up fallen leaves into something of a miniature tornado between their feet. 

"Hi," he finally said, placing his headphones around his neck and taking a step closer to her. "I'm Eddie." 

She introduced herself, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as she did. Fuck, he thought to himself. Even her name is beautiful. She offered him a seat at her table. He happily accepted, taking clumsy steps towards the chair she had vaguely gestured to. 

"What are you listening to?" She asked as he set his walkman and headphones onto the table. 

"The new Metallica."

She was surprised, though she supposed that she shouldn't be. The hair alone should have given her some inclination that he'd be into that type of music. Paired with the rings, chains, and leather jacket he kind of seemed like a stereotype of a metalhead. 

Before she could stop herself she was reaching her hand towards his. She felt electricity under her fingertips as she delicately lifted his hand, turning his palm up. 

Blood will follow blood.

"Goodness," she giggled as she read the black ink on his wrist. Her fingers rested softly against his palm. His smile curled higher on his cheeks as he gripped her hand in his own, turning it so that he could see her wrist. 

Birds. 

He took a moment to listen as he looked at the simple word that decorated her perfect skin. Sure enough, he heard birds above him. He'd never noticed. He never paid much attention at all to the sounds of birds. But now, more than anything, he was thankful for their songs. 

"It's a finch," she told him. 

Her voice pulled him from his own thoughts. His eyes met hers and he was suddenly glad to be sitting. The way her eyes seemed to melt everything in him must have been what people meant when they told him he'd "just know." 

"A finch, huh?" He asked. "He's quite the musician." 

"She, actually." 

"You, uh, know a lot about bird calls?" 

She shrugged. "Got really into birds when I was in school. Thought maybe it would help, I guess." She glanced down to where their hands were still resting on the table. "This didn't really give me a lot to go on." 

"I know the feeling," he laughed. "This song just came out today. Spent twenty years trying to figure out what the hell mine even meant." He noticed her empty coffee cup and the muffin that you'd picked at sitting next to it. "Their muffins suck." 

"Not always!" She defended her choice with a playful smile. "This particular one is disappointing, though, I'll admit." 

He stood quickly, his chair fumbling across the pavement. He pulled his hand away from hers as he stepped away. "I'll be right back," he assured her. His pace was quick, very nearly a jog as he walked to the passenger seat of his van in the parking lot around the building. 

When he returned he carried with him a plastic bowl with a red lid. He set the bowl on the table between them as he took his seat. 

"Gotta try these," he told her as he removed the lid. Inside were the frosted chocolate cupcakes that he'd intended to take to Dustin. He selected one, gently lifting it between his thumb and pointer finger. "Promise this is better than that nasty muffin." 

She accepted the cupcake with a smile. When she peeled down the paper liner she could instantly tell that it was going to be delicious. Perfectly moist, soft where her fingers gripped the sides. Eddie licked residual frosting from his thumb as she took a bite. 

"Oh, Christ," she all but moaned over the mouthful of cake. "You're right. So much better."

Eddie smiled, proud of himself. "Told ya," he giggled as she took a second bite. "Just made them yesterday. Finally got the recipe just right." 

"You made these?" She asked, her eyes widening. 

"With love," he winked. 

"Oh, god I'm so glad you're my soulmate." 

He blushed again at her confession. Obviously, they both knew that the other was their soulmates. Tattoos don't lie. But hearing the word fall from her lips, the way her voice wrapped around the two syllables was musical. He wanted to hear her call him her soulmate a million more times. 

~~~~~

Feedback is always appreciated! Requests are open! Have a great weekend! 🥰 If you'd like to be tagged in my Stranger Things fics, please let me know. I also have individual tag lists for Steve, Eddie, Robin, Nancy, and Steddie.

Tag List: @redwineanddnicotine @renaissan-vvitchh

Eddie Tag List: @littlemiss-yeehaw @protecteddiemunson4vr @tayhar8111

[camilletea]

Hey bestie just a quick q did you ever end up writing that time travel akai + conan fic where they systematically save amuros friends??? I think I’ve exhausted all of my time travel fic options, the idea was really fun and none of my favourite fanfics are updating anymore (since like 2011) so I’m desperate for some food 🙏🙇‍♀️ I beg just a crumb

Hi, it took me a while to get my thoughts together for this one, omg, but to answer your question, I did manage to write a good few chapters of it, but it's a branching story from the ones in my time travel ramblings (with the rest being notes, scenarios, timeline, and managing plotholes) and gave it the title Rye's Son. It never left my wip folder yet because I'm occupied right now with thesis papers. Although, I'm occasionally adding what I can.

For the record, Rye's Son was born out of a scenario where Akai and Conan are in the past - Akai in his own body and Conan being a separate entity from the Shinichi of that timeline - and it took place the day Masumi met the Whiskey Trio (contrary to my rambling where Shinichi's in his own body).

Rei and Hiro were both suspicious of Rye because he told them to go ahead of him. Of course, they didn't listen and tailed the guy (which Akai knows they will do). So they got the shock of their life when a first grader kid ran up to the freaking BO operative who's in the same danger levels as Gin, hugging him, and calling him, "Otou-san!" With said operative being affectionate in return.

It was Hiro who saw the gloves. Then they both concluded that Rye's son must be the most precious to him, because why else would he have the kid wear gloves if not to make sure nobody got hold of his fingerprints (by extention, identity)?

I hope that helps?

[tattlestarbeepbop]

I'm tired of this fandom being so small that everyone that makes content for it basically knows each other, sooo...

A la Randy Feltface's skit about Hemmingway, I bring you...

THE BACKSTORY OF: JANE WHITMAN

(In the span of however fast or slow you may read this.)

[Just a heads up, spoilers for Date Time ahead.]

GO!

Born in the year of, or at the very least some year before 1974, (Inferred by the newspaper we find in one of the first rooms of what we can only assume is her headspace and the fact that she has a teacher named Mrs. Afee in this year) Jane had an eventful childhood, such as her father basically abandoning her and her mother, leading to a childhood that Randy would call uneventful, but I know led to a majority of Jane's life being the way it is.

Mrs. Afee was concerned for her health because she usually just drew all day, never interacting with the other kids (Oh, hey, it's me!) She was also not that cooperative with her mother, which... granted, most kids aren't. There's also a cat plush that you can squish, but I can either say "This must've been Jane's comfort plush!" or I can just admit I don't know why it's there and move on.

In 1975 (Inferred by another newspaper) Jane was asked to draw something else by her teacher... and the result wasn't very pretty. Either way, it was in this year that Jane caught wind of Silicon Valley, a place in California known for it's technological whimsy!... which her mom thought was a financial fad. I want to see the look on her face when she finds out she was DEAD WRONG!

Jane liked watching TV, and one show she watched had a little sock puppet man named Klippy. He told her that she was loved and cared for and that somebody else out there in the world was the same way, which is true! Klippy also told Jane to never give up! And ya know what her momma said?!

"Don't listen to the TV, Jane. It'll rot your brain."

Everybody say it with me: FUCK YOU, JANE'S MOM!

...okay, I shouldn't give her too much shit, she was struggling with rent because her husband fucked off to Valhalla. (probably)

Anyway, next room/part of Jane's life! No year this time, but we can assume she's older. Now she's some quiet gal trying to get a job for the summer at a restaurant, but those guys rejected her. She got shoved into a locker by some bitchass named Jackie, some Mrs. Sophie woman (probably another teacher) tells her to give up on art and focus on getting her life together (and gave her only two options: Work force or housewife), and Jane's mother forces Jane to get into a prom dress that even Anna thinks is dreadful AND DATE SOME A-HOLE!

Literally. If my theory about the next room is right, her date is literally just called 'A-hole.'

Anyway, we have another year on a magazine! 1980! Woo-hoo! Anyway, this guy takes the time to share weird facts like "Did you know we only use 10% of our brains?" WHICH IS FUCKIN' BULLSHIT. He also claims to be a lawyer and that a limousine can still turn if tilted at a certain angle- actually, wait- no he didn't He told her it's not true after saying it! WHAT THE FU-

He says he's a fan of 'Art of War,' an ancient Chinese military treatise by Sun Tzu and that he'll pay for the meal if Jane gives him another date, to which she rightfully declines. Good on you, Jane. You deserve better. Anyway, she's scratched out her drawings because nobody supported her art career and her mom, despite being the partial cause of Jane's dismay was like "You used to draw all the time! What happened?"

Again, say it with me: FUCK YOU, JANE'S MOM!

Jane also tried to get a job working for a "John Avast," who, like basically everyone else in her life, rejected her. And then, finally, after so many years of heartbreak and depression... Jane met Melissa, a character from a dating game that's been there since the start of the series. She's also self-aware and will someday grow tired of the fruitless cycle of dates and smooches and cafes with only three choices on the player's side, including a SCRUMPTIOUS PANINI.

Anna's tired of Melissa in general and slices that memory to bits right in front of Jane. Yikes.

Anyway, Jane loved Melissa so much that upon actually getting her arm held by Melissa's pixelated figure as she begged to be with her, that she couldn't help but say yes and immediately start to gather the supplies for a break-in to the library, which her mother catches her in the act and SENDS HER TO A MENTAL INSTITUTION CALLED ST. PALO AFTER GETTING A NEW ROOMMATE.

ONE MORE TIME: FUCK YOU, JANE'S MOM!

In the next room, we meet the biggest bastard to ever bastard in Jane's life (other than Anna,) and his name is Dr.Kaperski. Real piece of work this one. Jane's restricted while she sits down and is basically forced to tell Dr.Kaperski what happened at the library, and when she's done, she rightfully tries to attack him, but a nurse forces her to take the medicine prescribed to her and possibly gain a fear of needles as a result if she didn't have one already.

And that's where the flashbacks end... but wait. There's more.

At the age of 24, Jane is let go, courtesy of the Data Time company, because SHE GOT HIRED AFTER SO FUCKIN' LONG, LET'S GOOOOO! She gets a copy of Anna and as we check her emails, we see an email from her mom. Again, I'd love to see the look on that woman's face when she thought semi-conductors were a financial fad! Sorry isn't going to cut it for scarring your kid for life!

Anyway, Anna takes Jane's wheel after taking her down memory lane, they shuffle on over to the library and confuse the fuck out of Melissa, but then when she's about to make her move and give the Anna-possessed Jane a big ol' smooch, she whips out a device that sends Melissa right back into the computer with one last moment of clarity that this ain't Jane, and with that, the (probably first ever) copy-protected Melissa diskette is born.

Jane ain't having it.

She fights with all of her might against big bad Anna and manages to tuck the diskette away in it's character's favorite book, Pride and Prejudice. Speaking of which, HOW, pray-tell, has nobody found that thing yet?! There's a demand in romantic books, so surely someone would've found it by now! (Not a knock against the game, just a joke.)

Anyway, Jane rushes out of the library before Martha (the librarian) or Anna (the bitch) can get her to show the diskette to them, and ends up running out of breath in the middle of the street before a fuckin' semi shows up AND SPLATTERS HER BODY ALL OVER THE STREET!

WHAT A GAL!

How I knew her age?

I found it on a funeral thing that I couldn't tell you about until you knew she died.

[stra-tek]

Excerpt ??? (I've lost count) from I Survived Kirk, my forthcoming fanfic autobiography of a bitter redshirt on Kirk's Enterprise

The entire reason this book exists is as a rebuttal of Risk is Our Business.  I’m not sure how much of that was written by Kirk himself and how much was his ghost writer, but the man depicted in that book is not the man I worked under for years.  Not in personality, not in reasoning.  Not in anything.  I see it as more whitewashing of history, more misinformation to pass along to the next generation.  This book exists as a counterpoint.  I’m no James T Kirk, I haven’t done the things he has.  I’ll never be as famous and this book will never be read by anywhere near as many people.  But if I can get through to just a few that’s fine by me.  So long as the truth as I know it is preserved in some way.

I first met James Tiberius Kirk when I reported aboard the USS Enterprise as a crewman in 2264.  He came in with a reputation, as the hero of what they were calling the “Gioghe Incident” where he’d taken command of the USS Lydia Sutherland, and although he lost his ship, he’d saved many lives.  He’d just been given a medal and a promotion.

The entire Enterprise crew was gathered in the shuttlebay for the change-of-command ceremony.  I was right at the back, in front of the mammoth clamshell doors.  At the other end of the bay, Captain Pike wished everyone well and Captain Kirk gave a short and completely unmemorable speech.

He seemed like a nice enough guy.  Young for a captain but confident in himself, enough so that you wanted to follow him.  And people would – for better or worse.

Our historic five-year mission was to begin with a routine patrol of bases along the Klingon border, ferrying a touring troupe to entertain the base personnel.  It was meant to be something nice and easy to get the crew accustomed to each other and their new commander.

Kirk’s mother and father both served in Starfleet.  Daddy Kirk rose through the ranks, becoming first officer of the Einstein-class deep-space scout USS Kelvin.  When James was born, George decided an assignment closer to Earth was preferable to years-long missions in deep space.  He transferred to become security chief of Starbase 2, the K-class space station roughly two weeks from Earth which I’d just left.

Apparently George and Winona Kirk’s Starfleeting was more important than raising kids, since they left Jimbo with relatives on Tarsus IV.

A teenage Jim Kirk survived The Tarsus IV Massacre, which cannot have left him without some serious psychological scars.

What was The Tarsus IV Massacre, you ask?  It was quite a big news story throughout the Federation at the time.  An alien fungus ruined an Earth colony’s entire food supply, and with help too far out to prevent mass starvation, the colony’s governor, a man named…Anton?  Arnold?  A-something Kodos decided the cull the “less useful” members of it’s population, so that the ones he decided were worthy of survival would survive long enough for help to arrive. 

So, he murdered half the colony’s population.  And then – here’s the kicker – rescue arrived much earlier than expected.  Early enough that nobody needed to be executed.  Except they already had.  Oh dear.

The scenes shown on the newscasts were shocking and graphic.  Far worse than anything I’d ever seen in my life up until that point.  Usually you hear just hear about murders and horrible events with options to click for more details and gross images.  Here we got shocking images of piles of charred dead bodies, many children, in our newsfeeds.  It was mind-blowing and harrowing to see things like this are still happening in Federation territory.  On a Federation colony world, no less.

It gets weirder, there were people asking how Kodos would be thought of had rescue arrived when expected, and his mass executions had saved half the population rather than doomed the whole?  While it’s an interesting scenario, the entire idea of this Kodos being the one to decide who lives and who dies is repulsive. Much more on James Kirk later.  And more on Kodos, too.

[thessalian]

Thess vs Refugee Issues

So apparently they're going to be rounding up as many of the refugees in this country as they can find, in kind of blitz attacks, in preparation for sending them to Rwanda. Which ... I mean ... it feels like an exaggeration to say "this feels like some Nazi bullshit" in this day and age, but the scary thing is that it's not an exaggeration.

It's getting more complicated and worse, too, because of the whole thing with Ireland being in the EU and Northern Ireland ... not. Because some have taken the risk of trying to get around how shitty the UK is being about refugees in small boats by going a little further and going to Ireland. Ireland is now saying they're going to punt them over the border into Northern Ireland because "they're not our problem", and the UK is going, "Only on the understanding that they're getting sent right back to France; hey, why don't you send them right back to France, since you're both EU?" and ... it's all too fucking complicated but people are playing this massive game of NIMBY with people who just want to live somewhere that they speak the language and won't be persecuted.

Seeing the accommodations for refugees who are sent to Rwanda ... it worries me. On one hand, it sounds pretty sweet, but ... there are a couple of issues I'm having. One - where are they getting the money for this? From us, one would assume, given that it's the UK's stupid project, so why don't they build something similar here? So I don't entirely trust it. I also don't like what I see between the lines of "They can go wherever they like; we're not keeping them incarcerated or anything!" Yes, it sounsd good, but ... like ... I feel like given Rwanda's history? They seem to be setting the stage for refugees just ... disappearing and for them to be able to say, "Well, we haven't been keeping them prisoner or anything; we're not responsible!"

I think the worst part is that the whole set-up gives one of two options for how to proceed: "We will help you live in Rwanda, or we will help you go back to your home country". Neither of those options sounds very good. Rwanda is away from friends and family, and is a strange country where they're only welcome to a point because some other government gave that country money to be rid of them, might have to learn a new language (though English is one of the languages used in Rwanda, along with French, Swahili, and Kinyarwanda, so I guess it depends on how widely English is used). Alternatively ... why the fuck would they want to go back to their home country? They risked their lives to run from it because staying there was worse!

Meanwhile, more and more refugees are being created - Israel vs Pakistan, Iran vs Israel, gods know how many others (there's only so much news I can stomach, I admit) - and nobody seems to care beyond yelling "NOT IN MY BACK YARD!" every time these people who lost everything but their lives need a place to stay.

And this country? They're now talking about cutting down on the number of international students allowed to come here. They just ... really, really hate foreigners right now. And I know they probably don't mean me - not even so much because I'm white, because the Polish population of the UK got so much horrific shit thrown at them in the time around the Brexit referendum, but because I'm North American. People still ask "What part of the States are you from?" because I think they forgot Canada exists. Despite being part of their Commonwealth, which ... kind of grinds my gears, but anyway. Point is that none of that "They probably don't mean me" helps. First, I'm angry as hell that they mean anyone when they're talking about cruelty to people who were not born in this country. But also? When it's everyone who wasn't born here - the families of healthcare workers, university students, anyone who doesn't make enough money? It's hard to avoid the idea that they do mean me. Especially since I'm not cis, I'm not het, and I am not healthy and fully abled.

I try pretty hard to look on the bright side of things, or at least focus on the small joys of my life. The latter works better than the former. The "bright side of things" is getting smaller and smaller every day, and ... yeah.

[karin-gespenst]

Season 13 episode 2 & 3 combined rewatch

Phyllis teaching the student midwives about the privilege of attending to mothers during a home birth is a powerful scene. Joyce asks about the safety of hospital births and BOY has this question made people feel emotions ever since hospitals were an option for giving birth. of course, the options for giving birth vary a lot from country to country and region to region. Having choice is so important and infrastructure for emergencies is equally vital. But I'm sure what nobody really wants is families having no safe option at all. Sadly that's what I see happening in too many regions. The hospital where my kid was born is no longer a hospital but a hospice. The town where she was born will no longer have a hospital with a maternity unit in the near future. The next hospital with one will be 20 minutes drive away. And while that is not too bad in comparison to other regions, it would have been too far for me back then. Nobody wants BBA situations in cars or on parking lots, and not everybody can stay home safely. Also, there are not enough midwives who attend home births because they would have to pay a fortune for insurance and they don't get paid enough to do so. Midwifery being a calling does not justify the low pay. With the high responsibility and skill level and especially working conditions they should all be paid much more.

Joyce shows how quickly she learns when attending to Edna. Giving her encouragement and valuing her work makes such a difference. Shelagh is adding her own experience with the repeated suggestion of financial aid. I remember the episode with young mother Marion who did not want help around the house, and then a fellow mother gave her the right nudge with the simple words "You're entitled."

The driving "lesson" with Matthew is supposed to be comic relief, but all it does is give mood whiplash after the heartbreaking scene with Edna feeding her son.

Is learning to drive harder when you're learning in a van? Fred's van seems a little more three-dimensional than the tiny green thing Trixie drove before.

Nancy and Joyce talking about their mould-experiences and how hospital is lovely and clean - germs resistant to antibiotics were not as common back then. it's a shame they became so widespread. Maybe Timothy's generation of doctors will learn to not give everyone precautionary antibiotics just because they can.

I'm growing more and more fond of Sister Veronica. She has the bite that Sister Evangelina brought to the table, and her knowledge of the different possibilities for help makes her highly valuable for Nonnatus House. Her "embellishments" are sometimes just the thing that is needed to bring the right people in or move an obstacle and that is a chaotic-good character trait with a lot of potential for entertainment.

effin ineffable? Colette dearest, that's another show.

social worker training in only 6 weeks? They must have needed them very badly. Today it's three years study at least where I live.

What I love about the newspaper shop as a location is that we're getting to see a lot more newspapers and magazines. The prop department can show off their skills, likewise with the sewing shop, but the paper shop sells an even wider range of wares and that means they can use almost everything in there.

The way that other candidate says the word "mayor" it sounds like "Mäher" in German and that's exactly the kind of gardening device that Fred injured himself on.

Rosalind with the nursing book and ideas for postnatal classes: of course new fathers also need a bit of looking after, but it's not the new mother who should have to do that. It should be friends and relatives and neighbours and I think especially other fathers. The only instance I can remember of fathers looking out for each other is the Fleming family when Derek goes for a pint with his national service friend after Christopher has died. Or maybe way back Tony Amos and his father-in-law.

Gillian's husband looks very much younger than her.

Trixie does use a particular voice on the phone with the shop. The theatricals of being a Lady are like a role that she steps into. Her actual self is showing clearly when she's comforting Violet and preparing her to see Fred in the hospital.

How did you choose your couch? I got mine because I liked the outrageous color. Should I get a new one, it'll have to be one that can open up into a guest bed.

I had a look into how hip problems in newborns are treated today and the kind of hip problem Stephanie has is found in 2-3 newborns. The devices to treat the condition look a good deal more comfortable than the one we saw on the show. Some baby carriers can also help in keeping baby in the right position, with the legs and bottom in kind of an M shape.

they fooled me the first time I watched the episode when the doctors rushed to help the man in the bed beside Fred, and again when I rewatched the scene. Sister Monica Joan sunk into deepest prayer reminded me of how many decades of her life she must have spent praying. Would heaven hear her prayers all the more loudly because of it? Kind of like when Trixie called the shop as Lady Aylward to make them open up late. "This is the most senior nun of the entire order of midwives, don't you dare take our friend from this earth before his time!"

Mrs. Wallace is growing on me. We might not agree on religion, but I respect her sense of community and her attitude towards helping anyone who comes her way. I feel like she is the Miss Higgins of her church, keeping everyone in order.

Miss Higgins! her contribution this week will flow into a different post.

Reggie's idea with bringing Italian food to the hospital is fabulous!