#no worries i did get it! and even drafted a reply last night but wanted to sleep and then come back to it with a clearer head

[searchingforserendipity25]

Your dark waters piece is so gorgeous!! The style feels so elegant

-@outofangband

Thank you so much @outofangband! I started it last week for mayglor, after chatting with @meadowlarkx about maglor + mermaids. I wanted to write something for mermay, but got stuck a bit until last night.

There are some lovely art pieces on tumblr for mermayglor (can this be a holiday? Banks close, everyone goes mermaid hunting by blaring contemporaries art music on speakers, etc). I'd already done a mayglor thing, but the mermaid concept was fighting me a bit! There are some other drafts about it that might have worked, but I'm much happier with how this one turned out. Daeron stole the show, in true siren rocks rockstar fashion!

Doubling down on the stylistic choices was what made it finally work, so I'm so glad that struck you, it's very validating haha <3

[favefandomimagines]

Ocean Away (a.b)

Summary: a disastrous fight threatens to end your engagement with Anthony

AN: inspired by “Ocean Away” from the Unofficial Bridgerton Musical. I know it’s a song for Daphne and Simon but I thought it would fit so well with Anthony

This was deeeep in my drafts

He hadn’t meant for it to get so out of hand. What started out as a seemingly normal conversation, ended in both you and Anthony shouting at each other.

“Anthony, I need to ask you something.” You said to your fiancé. “Yes, darling?” He questioned. “When was the last time you saw Siena?” You asked.

The question took him aback. You have never spoken of Siena or his past endeavors. Meaning something must have made you ask him. “What has made you wonder such a thing?” Anthony asked. “Lady Whistledown,” You started before a scoff cut you off.

“Lady Whistledown? You are believing this gossip now.” He spoke. “She has never been wrong before, Anthony. She wrote that she saw you leave the opera house the other evening.” You said.

“An evening where you said you were with Benedict.” You added. “You are above believing these lies, Y/N.” He said. “You have not yet denied it once.” You replied.

Anthony had yet to deny any of what Lady Whistledown wrote and that made you fear that what you had read was true. “I should not have to. We are to be husband and wife in a matter of weeks and you question my fidelity to you.” Anthony said.

“Because two weeks before you proposed to me you were with her. Am I wrong for worrying?” You rebutted. “Your insecurities are not my doing, do not put this blame on me.” He snapped. “My insecurities? I have never been insecure in our engagement until you gave me a reason to be.” You spoke. “This is mad. You believe Lady Whistledown over me?” He asked.

“For goodness sake, Anthony, you have not denied it! There is only one side to this currently and it is hers.” You yelled. “Well, forgive me for not wanting to entertain this any longer.” He said, turning away from you. “You cannot even be honest with me, can you?” You asked quietly.

Anthony could hear the way your voice began to break as his back was to you. He never wanted to hurt you.

Hurting you was at the top of a list of things he never wanted to do to you. And by not claiming his innocence because of his pride, he was hurting you.

“I am going to spend the night in Eloise’s room.” You announced. Anthony still made no attempt to move or even apologize.

You wiped a tear from your face quickly as you headed for the door.

“I sincerely hope you know that Lady Whistledown said I was mad for accepting your proposal. That you would always be the naive and self-sabotaging young viscount. Please do not prove her right.” You spoke before leaving the room.

The problem was Anthony was a prideful man and it would be his pride that would prevent him from doing what was right.

The garden party was supposed to be a celebration of your engagement and it was turning quite sour. Luckily, no one knew of the turmoil that was going on because of the facade you had put on all day.

You spoke to guests, entertained their prodding questions into your wedding and tried to carry on with the afternoon. Your eyes often wandered to Anthony, who was standing stoically with Colin and Benedict. He looked as if he had completely forgotten about your argument as if it meant nothing.

It hurt you, seeing him act so blasè about what had occurred the night prior. That made you fearful because what if he ended the engagement? What if he did not want you anymore?

He had yet to apologize for the way he spoke and the words he said, you had hoped he had just forgotten. Or maybe he was not sorry at all.

You found Eloise and Penelope Featherington, both girls trying to help distract you from your own thoughts.

Eloise was one of your favorite people because of simply how she was unapologetically herself. She was a very funny young woman and that was refreshing in society.

Anthony watched you as you smiled and laughed with his sister by the lake. You were happy after all that happened last night. How could you be happy?

“How can she be smiling? It is as if she realized I am not what she wants.” Anthony spoke aloud. Benedict and Colin looked at one another, neither knowing how to approach the topic.

��Brother, maybe she is trying to be brave. Not let people know she is hurting. They all believe you were with Siena the other evening, she is trying to show it is all a lie. Even if she does not believe it herself.” Benedict said.

Anthony continued to watch you, your eyes never once meeting his gaze. He knew he needed to apologize to you. Tell you that he was never with Siena and the moment he realized you were who he wanted, he had not seen her.

There was a moment where he lost you in the crowd of people. He did not know where you went off to and that worried him more so than his pride.

Anthony started frantically looking around the grounds for you, weaving through the crowd until he spotted you sitting on the bench under the willow tree.

You had always loved that spot and often times Anthony would catch you reading there. It was also the spot you were sitting in when the two of you confessed your love for each other for the first time.

He approached you silently and sat down a few inches away from you.

“I remember the first time I saw you. You had just arrived at the Queen’s ball with your mother and it felt as if time stopped. There was nothing, that tempted me to take my eyes off of you. I knew then that I wanted you and only you. You made me believe that marriage could be for love and for nothing else.” Anthony spoke.

Him recounting the night of your debut made your eyes well up with tears.

“I am afraid. I am afraid that you will want her again and I cannot go through that kind of pain. I love you with everything that I am and if I was not enough for you, it would be the death of me.” You confessed.

Anthony looked at you with slightly wide eyes, never having heard your concerns before. He blamed his past behavior on your fears knowing it was not an easy feat to love someone with his reputation.

He moved closer to you and took your hand in his. “I am also afraid.” He spoke. It was then you looked at him with eyes wide, never having heard the man you love he so vulnerable.

“I am afraid that I will not make you happy. That one day you will wake up and feel like some other man could make you happier.” He continued. “I do not think there is another man in this lifetime who will make me as happy as you do.” You said.

“I have not nor will I ever, see Siena again. You are the woman I love, the woman I cannot stop thinking about. It will always be you.” Anthony said. “She has always had such a strong hold on you, forgive me for being skeptical.” You muttered.

“Now the only woman who has a strong hold on me is you. And that is how it will stay.” He replied. “Do you promise?” You asked. “I promise.” He spoke without hesitation.

Anthony took your hand in his and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “I love you, Y/N. I always have and I always will.” He said. “I love you too.” You spoke. “And I’m sorry.” You added. “You have nothing to be sorry for, my love.” Anthony replied.

“Your mama might think we have run off and abandoned our own celebration.” You commented. “That does sound rather tempting.” Anthony teased.

You stood up and held your hand out for his, which he took with a smile. If you would have told Anthony Bridgerton that he was about to get married and to the love of his life, he would have called you mad. But here he was, and couldn’t have been happier.

[mokulule]

The Number You Have Called Cannot Be Reached 3

Part 1|Part 2

Ship: Dead on Main (Danny/Jason) Warnings: angst/depression and canon typical violence

I'm not entirely happy with this, but I hope you enjoy it anyways. Some things will probably be changed for the Ao3 version, this is very much first draft and I want to do a proper rewrite before then.

Jason parked his bike next to the Batmobile. There was a strange air in the Batcave or maybe it was just him being different. He couldn’t tell for sure. He stepped off the bike so he had his back towards Bruce, who sat by the Batcomputer with his cowl off. Jason could still feel his gaze when he looked up. He didn’t know what to feel. Where was he supposed to start?

“Little Wing!” Dick announced happily, suddenly slinging an arm across his shoulder from behind. It was only all his training that stopped him from jumping three feet into the air from the fright and he managed to just tense - but that was normal. Dick would consider that normal. Pull yourself together, Jason, he scolded himself. Normal, act normal, for one long moment he was grasping for what was normal. It definitely wasn’t the urge to lean into his big brother.

“Jay?” Dick asked quietly, worried, thankfully too quiet for anyone to hear. Panic grasped him and he elbowed Dick to get him off. Dick bent over with an oomph. At least elbowing Dick was a normal response, even if it was for the wrong reason.

Ignoring the strange urge to check on Dick, he squared his shoulders, firmly didn’t look back and walked forward towards the Batcomputer, where now that he had arrived the rest of this night’s patrol team gathered. Damian already out of his suit with damp hair and a towel slung around his neck glanced surreptitiously at Jason out the corner of his eyes even as he pretended to look towards Bruce - brat was still worried. Tim was curled up in an office chair doing who knew what with his laptop in a way that did not seem conducive to the healing of the broken ribs he’d been benched for. Bruce himself, paused what he was doing and spun around in his chair. Even sitting he managed to draw everyone’s attention, Tim even closed his laptop.

Jason purposefully crossed his arms and widened his stance. That’s what they expected of him, probably? How did he usually stand? He usually always felt one wrong comment away from a fight when he was here, he should stand like he expected it, right? Defensive.

This was exhausting.

At last Dick walked up to them completing their loose circle. He was rubbing his side and Jason felt a stab of worry and guilt. Had he aggravated an existing wound? Shit. Fuck. What was wrong with him? Why was he so worried?

“Oracle,” Bruce spoke, “please start.”

“Thanks to Hood, we now have a better headshot of the thief,” Oracle announced from the computer speakers“The Ghost,” Dick interjected in a sing song voice, “after what happened tonight you can’t disagree.”“Nightwing,” Barbara replied flatly, she didn’t even need to say she thought it was a stupid name. “The thief,” she reiterated in a way that left no room for any other arguments and Dick wisely held his silence. At least Dick knew Barbara well enough when to stop. Finally she pulled two photos up on the large screen. The one on the right was an older/early photo with the green glassed goggles obstructing much of the upper half of the face, a grin was a sharp line of white on the lower half of the face in the blurry photo, the quality was terrible and caught in movement.

The newer photo on the left showed a young man, maybe even late teens, eyes were wide, bright green, not quite glowing and his face beet red in embarrassment, mouth slightly open - this was taken just after he’d pushed away from Jason. His goggles sat at the edge of his messy black hair, just high enough to see the way he was beginning to swell on his forehead where Jason had clocked him.

Jason looked from one picture to the other, something was off to him. The grin was an obvious difference, but these where snapped in very different moments, and he shouldn’t let different emotions cloud his judgment.

“He’s lost weight.” The realization hit him with the certainty of a sledgehammer.

There’s dubious mumbling around him, about the blurriness of the first picture. But Jason is unmoved, there’s a hollowness to the guy’s cheeks that wasn’t there before.

“We can’t really judge that sort of thing with the quality of the first image,” Barbara cut through the murmurs. Jason knows he right, but he doesn’t feel like arguing.

He doesn’t feel like arguing, it’s another realization that leaves him wrong footed and he’s not listening for a minute. Checking back into the conversation he only caught the tail end of the conversation that was apparently about the Meta’s skills.“-we can now add phase shifting powers-““Like a Ghost.”

Tim groaned and Barbara outright growled - Jason reevaluated his earlier thought that Dick knew Barbara’s limits. Damian had already accepted the logic and Bruce had long since become immune to this sort of Dick antic.

“Back on topic,” was all he said. “Tim.”

Tim opened his laptop back up.

“Yes, so the items the thief-” There was a small beat as everyone waited for Dick to interrupt, Tim was side-eyeing him but continued; “-is stealing are still painting a very alarming picture, and there is a multitude of very dangerous uses, not to mention what kind of world ending horror they could be built into. Luckily he didn’t get the prototype spectral calibrator tonight, and we’ll be keeping it here for the time being and set the project on an indefinite hold at Wayne Enterprise.”Tim looked up at Bruce. “We’ll be needing to monitor Star Labs as they have a similar project, but so far the Ghost has not operated outside of Gotham to our knowledge.”

Bruce nodded, “I’ll arrange something.”

It was a signal for Tim to continue, “we’re still no closer to a way to capture him and the phase shifting is a whole other added concern. We’ll need to figure out if there’s something he can’t phase through, some denser materials perhaps. I just finished looking through tonight’s footage and from what I’m seeing at least the new filter program is holding up; both the audio and visuals have very few glitches now. But we still don’t know how he’s sending out the electromagnetic interference.”

“Ghoooost,” Dick said quietly under his breath.Tim’s left eye twitched dangerously. Jason couldn’t help smiling, it was very good he was wearing the helmet. Bruce once more ignored Dick looking to Damian.The kid straightened imperceptibly at the attention, it really was adorable, but his voice was as haughty as ever. “Blood sample is already being analyzed of course, tt.” Blood sample? Oh, that’s what Bruce had been doing on the roof, when Jason was distracted. A sick feeling rose in his stomach thinking of the blood, was Ghost even alive? He could be bleeding inside the head for all they knew.

“Hood,” Bruce asked quietly, “do you know why the Ghost reacted to you like that?”Jason stiffened. Fear grabbing cold onto his heart. There was no way he could tell them he thought it had to do with the pits. They’d think Jason was being influenced by the Ghost and bench him. He couldn’t let that happen, he needed answers. He didn’t need to fight his family.

“No damn clue,” he scoffed, hoping he sounded nonchalant and none of his panic shone through, “some weird trauma response? He’d just hit his head real good.”

Bruce looked at him dubiously, but he was clearly unwilling to risk pushing. Their truce was a tentative one after all, one they’d come to after many false starts and stops. Jason had never before been so glad for their tattered relationship.

“So to conclude,” Dick drew everyone’s attention off Jason, “the Ghost is still a mystery, we don’t know if he’s just a thief or a supervillain biding his time.”

“He’s not a supervillain.” Jason could have cursed himself, he’d just gotten their attention off him. Now he was forced to elaborate. “He’s not wearing any sort of body armor, just that hoodie.”

And he’d definitely broken some of his ribs landing on him, Jason thought with a pang of guilt.

“Not all villains wear body armor though,” Tim pointed out carefully, and now Tim was worried too, Jason had no clue what had given him away.

“The ones who engage in close combat with us usually do though,” Dick returned, and Jason could have hugged him for bailing him out again (if that had been normal, which it was NOT).

“He could just not be a very good villain?”

“Or he’s just banking on the fact that he’s very good at dodging,” Barbara interjected with annoyance before the discussion got out of hand, “or did you all just forget you’ve been chasing this guy for weeks without landing a substantial hit on him?” She could always be counted on to be the voice of reason.

Dick scratched the back of his head sheepishly. Tim looked down at his computer. Damian scoffed, trying to look unaffected but that was definitely almost a pout.

Bruce’s eyes twinkled in amusement as he stood up and was that almost a smile? How was this happening? It felt… His fingers dug into his arms. It felt like all the things Jason had convinced himself had never really been there. And there was Bruce’s hand landing on Damian’s shoulder; a silent comfort-encouragement, because Bruce was terrible with words but his touches always spoke volumes. And as the small smile bloomed on Damian’s face and he quickly looked away to hide it, Jason remembered exactly how that felt. Shit.

“Oracle, that’s all for tonight, we’re not getting anywhere without more information.”

“You got it, B, Oracle out.”

Jason spun and stalked towards his bike, before he did something, he didn’t know what exactly.

“Jay?”

Bruce’s voice stopped him in place. He glanced over his shoulder to see them all watching him. Don’t give anything away, he scolded himself.

“What is it, old man?” Jason asked trying to interject as much annoyance into his voice as he could, but it was so hard dredging up any of that when they looked at him worried like that, and his chest ached and he just sounded tired.

“It’s late,” Bruce said with a small unconscious wave of his hand as if anyone could tell the time of day from within the cave, “you could stay the night?”

After a beat he added, “Alfred would love to see you.”

Jason’s jaw clenched. Alfred would, but that’s not what Bruce was really saying, he was saying he would love to have him stay, but didn’t think Jason would be receptive to that and so he brought out the Alfred card. It was plain as day and how had Jason never seen that? Seen the longing on his dad’s face? His chest ached, he knew why. He was always so busy reading everything Bruce did as him trying to control him, every interaction tinted in green. His chest ached. Every inch of his body wanted to stay, to take a step back, see where this could lead, but he couldn’t.

He had to act normal. Normal Jason would never. Normal Jason could be back tomorrow for all he knew. He couldn’t do that to any of them, to himself.

With great difficulty he tore his gaze away from his family and walked the last steps over to his bike.

“Tell Alfred I’ll be coming over for tea on Tuesday,” he said loudly over the noise of his bike, not looking, because he didn’t want to see any of their reactions, then he tore out of there.

This was better for everyone.

Poor Jay really is having the time of it, maybe next part he'll get to actually enjoy not being angry.

next Masterpost for subscription link

[spinningwebsandtales]

Imagine Kafka Taking You On A Date

Kafka Hibino X FemReader

Rating: T

Warnings: A little steamy but it's just a whole lotta fluff

Word Count: 2k

Requested by @banana658

(A/N:) I didn't meant for this to take me as long as it did. I've been in a little writing slump as my artwork is taking most of my time. It doesn't help that I have a painful cyst in my wrist. But I can tough it out especially when I get to write cute stuff like this! I just love writing for Kafka and getting requests for him are like a present to me! I'm glad to see other fangirls appreciate Kafka like I do! So I hope you enjoy this little piece of fluff and that is everything you wanted and that it was also worth a little bit of the wait! I still have several Kafka works sitting in my drafts so keep an eye out! Until next time happy reading! ~Countess

Kafka leaned against a building wall, tucking his hands into his pockets while strangers passed him by. It was a nice change of pace seeing civilians so relaxed, despite the fact that a kaiju attack could come at any moment. It was thanks to The Defense Force that people could have some semblance of normalcy and he so desperately wanted to join that team. And he had one last chance, one more time to try before his age caught up to him once and for all. But he shook his head, shoving those thoughts to the back of his mind as he continued to wait. He hoped for just one evening the kaiju would pity him and let him have this moment to enjoy something he never allowed himself. Rushed footsteps had Kaka turning his head towards the sound pushing any remaining thoughts to the very back of his mind. He spotted you quickly making your way through the flood of the crowd. You waved when you noticed Kafka staring and he waved back. His heart began to pound a little harder, seeing your messy bun and casual clothes that were both comfy and stunning on you. In seconds you stood before him panting and tucking strands of hair that had slipped loose.

"Sorry I'm late," you panted. "I got caught at work and I ran home to change. I hope you weren't waiting here long."

"Nah I haven't been here that long at all," he grinned easing your worries. In all honesty he would wait an eternity for you if it was required. He kept that embarrassing thought to himself though.

"How was work," you asked while adjusting the strap of your purse that had slipped in your rush.

"Messy," Kafka replied causing you to giggle.

"I salute you and all the crews that clean up the kaiju aftermath. I couldn't do it."

"The smell isn't so bad once you get used to it," Kafka shrugged before offering you his arm. "Though intestine duty sucks! Nobody can get used to that part." He knew you were being nice, asking him about his work but he refused to let the topic of kaiju guts ruin his night out with you.

"Seriously," you took Kafka's arm leaning up against him while your fingers threaded together with his. "I appreciate what you do Kafka. The Defense Force gets all the glory and they should but I don't want you guys to feel like nobody appreciates you."

He blushed, glad to have people like you to realize the important work he and his fellow kaiju cleaners do.

"How was work for you," Kafka asked, happy to have a chance to change the subject as you both walked together. The softness of your fingers laced with his wasn't lost on him as he was having a hard time keeping himself together.

"Ugh busy," you deflated. "I was so excited about tonight that everyone and their aunt came in to slow me down. Then when you're naturally in a hurry everything slows you down. But I made it and I'm here with you so that's all that matters."

"You don't have to be in a hurry to be on time with me. I would wait for you as long as it takes. You're worth every second."

"Well aren't you sweet Kafka," you cooed as a blush darkened Kafka's cheeks.

"Soooo," he coughed, "how about conveyor belt sushi?"

"Yes please! I'm starving and I feel like I could eat my body weight in sushi right now."

"Good because I know the perfect place."

"Lead the way oh valiant man of kaiju disposal!"

The place Kafka chose was packed with the dinner rush but you both were able to snag the last booth before the line outside started to gather. Kafka helped you to sit before taking his seat in the booth across from you. He knew most girls would hate having to be in such a cheap place, they rather have the expensive sushi restaurants. But not you, you were always content and happy to be around him no matter where you both went. You were watching the little plates go around and around, trying to decide what you wanted first and Kafka was just content just watching you instead. You glanced towards the screen at the table, of the anime character keychains the restaurant was advertising if you ate so many plates. Kafka made it his mission right then that he wasn't leaving until you at least had one keychain, even if it wasn't exactly the one you wanted.

"Who are you wanting to get (Y/N)," Kafka leaned in to ask.

You pointed," Him! He's my absolute favorite but I would take any one of them honestly. It's fun just to see the surprise."

He nodded, "Well we can't get you your prize unless we start eating so dig in!"

"Gladly," you beamed.

Easy conversation passed between you both as plates began to pile on the table. Kafka would take the time out to slide them into the counter and it wouldn't be long until you had that prize in hand. You had forgotten about the prize so far as you were enjoying the food. While you stuck with most of your favorites you weren't scared to branch out and try other things you normally wouldn't. You picked up a plate while Kafka slid more plates getting them out of the way and counted, you took a bite. You could have melted into the floor at the delicious taste and you knew you had to share with Kafka.

"That good huh," he chuckled.

"You have to try some!"

"Okay," Kafka smiled. "I'll grab one as it comes by."

"You don't have to," you picked up the other sushi piece with your chopsticks and held it out to him. "Here have this piece!"

Kafka looked at you before glancing at your chopsticks. The ones you had been using since the meal began and it made him shiver.

"I couldn't possibly take yours. You really like it."

You still held the sushi out a stubborn pout on your face and Kafka knew he couldn't win against you. He liked you too much and he would count this indirect kiss as a blessing. He took the food and you were right it was delicious. Though he did have to fight the red in his cheeks before you noticed. Kafka gulped as you took another bite with the chopsticks you just used to feed him. That's when you jolted, realizing what you just did.

"Kafka I am so sorry," you couldn't believe you didn't realize. "I wasn't thinking! I hope I didn't make you feel uncomfortable."

He waved his hands quickly trying to dash your fears, "No it's fine! It didn't bother me at all! I just didn't want you grossed out that you shared your chopsticks with me and I didn't want to take a piece of the food you're enjoying."

"I want to share," you replied pushing the plate towards him. "I never want to be selfish whenever it comes to you."

"I don't think you have a selfish bone in your body," Kafka replied as he took your hand when you released the plate. He kissed your wrist gently and placed it back on the table. He turned to put more plates into the counter when you tried to reply. It was that moment that you both had eaten enough and your prize dropped down cutting the conversation short. Kafka gently took it from the chute and deposited it into your hand.

"Your prize! Open it let's see who you got," he grinned brightly and you shivered in anticipation.

Kafka paid the tab and held the door open for you as you both made it back onto the street. You skipped happily your new keychain already put on your purse. You had to stop yourself from squealing in the restaurant when you opened the capsule to see the character you wanted nestled inside. Kafka had clapped for you, extremely happy that on the first try you had gotten the keychain you wanted. His mind kept racing as did his heart at the thought of your radiant smile.

This time Kafka took your hand, lacing your fingers together. He had never been happier than in this moment. He had a lot riding on tomorrow and he wanted to remember this time for a long time just in case everything didn't go well tomorrow.

"Are you okay," you interrupted his thoughts as you felt Kafka's body stiffen.

He sighed, "Yeah. I take the physical test tomorrow for The Defense Force. Ichikawa pushed me to try again and he's testing with me. The kid has a lot of potential but I'm still skirting by by the edge of my teeth. And I'm terrified, it's my last chance as I'll be too old next year and that's the end of my dream."

You squeezed Kafka's hand tightly, trying to will the confidence you had in him into his being. "You can do this Kafka. I believe in you and Japan could use a man like you in The Defense Force. I know your best friend is a captain and she's amazing, but you're amazing too. You just have to realize that and know that nobody can judge you by things you can and can't do. Just give it your all I know you can do it!"

Kafka wiped at his eyes and tugged you into a crushing hug. You squeezed him back tightly glad that you were able to encourage him, even if it was just a little bit.

"C'mon let's get you home so you can be well rested for tomorrow," you finally said when he let you go.

"That eager to get rid of me," he chuckled while he sniffled.

"Absolutely not but a Defense Force officer in the making needs plenty of rest!"

"Yes ma'am," Kafka saluted. "But I'm making sure you get home safely. I'll go straight home I promise."

"Pinky promise," you glared knowing that Kafka had a habit of enjoying a beer or two once he got home.

He wrapped your pinky with his and nodded, "I promise."

You leaned in kissing his cheek, "For luck."

He cupped your cheek and pressed his forehead to yours as your pinkies remained intertwined. He brushed a tender kiss against your lips. You melted against him tugging him closer with hand pulling at the collar of his shirt. He deepened the kiss leaving you breathless as you both finally realized the tension between you two melting away. Kafka had tried to rein in his feelings, afraid that he would lose you if you knew how he felt about you. But as you kissed back he realized how much you felt the same. Parting from you he kept his forehead against yours, trying to catch his breath as he gazed into your misty eyes.

"I wanted to do that for awhile now," he admitted.

"Me too," you smiled blushing bright pink. "But no more distractions get me home!"

Kafka swung your clasped hands making you laugh as you both continued talking. Dreaming about the future as he lead you home, making sure you were safe inside before you closed the door. As promised Kafka went straight home and got ready for bed. He just knew he would make it this time and it was all thanks to you. He couldn't wait to call you tomorrow and tell you that he made it. He fell asleep with your smile in his thoughts and the kiss still lingering on his lips.

[rd0265667]

Tzuyu x Reader: Run Away

Permanent Taglist: @cwpiqwon @justme-idle

A/N: Had a fic in the drafts for Chiro coming back, so here it is! Hope y’all enjoy☺️(esp chiro)

“I love you.”

It was a pretty typical line to say to the person you were dating, right? Okay, you could see how it was a little strong of a word. Like was a school crush, a fleeting crush maybe. But Love was usually forever. It meant commitment, faith, and everything inbetween. You understood it’s significance, which is why you hadn’t said it for so long, but today? With the moonlight shining down on her hair, her gummy smile illuminating the world, well, your world, but that was enough for you.You steadied your nerves, and you uttered those 3 words, hoping for the best. You wouldn’t exactly classify what happened as the best though.

Her smile faded in the blink of an eye, her irises contracting as she looked stunned, some might even say she was afraid from the looks of it.

“Tzuyu, you alright?” You hesitantly raised your right hand, trying to tap her on the shoulder, shake her out of whatever trance she was under.

Her shoulder darted away from you, you could hear her breath hastening as she looked down, shaking her head rapidly.

“We’re over, go away, now.” Was all you heard Tzuyu mutter, before she grabbed her bag and sprinted from the bench the two of you had made yours.

All that was left now was you, stunned in silence at the bench, only the still piping hot fries and the flowers she had given you prior left as the indicator of the amazing date the two of you were having up till that point.

You wanted to chase after her, but you heard her last words to you. You didn’t understand what had happened, but you didn’t want to go against her, so at least for now, you let her be, only dropping a quick text to Sana.

“Text me once Tzuyu gets home alright? Thanks Sana.” You quickly typed, before sighing, walking back home with fries and flowers in hand.

”What the hell happened?” You saw the message from Sana pop up, causing you to sigh.

“It’s complicated.” You replied, leaning back on your pillow.

“You said you loved her, didn’t you?” You read the message, and your eyes almost popped out of its sockets.

“How did you know?” You quickly replied.

“Come over now.” Was all Sana replied.

“Tzuyu said she wanted me gone, and I want to leave her be for now…”

“Come over now before I drag you by your eyelids.”

”Fine.”

After exchanging pleasantries with the guard at the dorm’s security, you nervously ran up the stairs, noticing the door slightly ajar. Sana’s machinations, no doubt.

Lightly pushing the door open, you quickly pulled back, hiding behind the door as much as you could as you heard Sana having a rather heated discussion with Tzuyu.

”What’s so scary about the word? You’re okay with telling me and all the other girls that you love us, and you don’t flinch when any of us say we love you, so why the hell is Y/N any different? Huh? You know as well as I do, or anyone with eyes and a twinge of common sense, that Y/N loves you, and that if you asked for the stars, that fool would pluck them out from the sky, so why? What’s so scary about the word huh? What?” Sana tried to keep her cool, but as someone who had spent so much time pushing the two of you together, just for all of that to disappear in just a night, she was frustrated to say the least.

From the back, you could see Tzuyu’s shoulders heaving up and down, hearing her breath hasten. In your worry, you were just about to bolt from behind your hiding spot, but you quickly stopped, shocked at what had transpired.

“Easy for you to say! Love comes just sooo easy to you, the great Minatozaki Sana, but some of us have been through shit okay! Do you know what it feels like to give yourself into a love that was never there? To hope so desperately against hope, that whatever you had was real, only for you to be left, in the dust, lying in a pool of your own despair and pain? I know Y/N loves me, and you know damn well I feel the same way, but I just can’t say it, because what if things change? What if I throw myself into love again, only to fall back in the void? How am I supposed to just go back to the way things were before? Even then, you know just as much as I do, the people who date idols go through hell sometimes. Sure, Y/N can handle it now, but what if one day it gets too much? It all ends the same way Sana. Me, alone. So tell me Sana, why is love so hard?” Tzuyu screamed in an outburst uncharacteristic of hers, but you could sense the anger, rage, and to some degree, sadness.

Even Sana stood there, speechless as Tzuyu seethed with rage, before she turned to leave, her face quickly draining of colour though.

“Hey…” You awkwardly say unsure of what to do, but Tzuyu’s eyes widened, before she quickly ran, moving to her room before slamming the door shut.

“I’m sorry…” Sana muttered, worried by her friend’s outburst, but you quickly tried to calm her down, then moved to Tzuyu’s room.

“Tzu, you there?” You whispered before you leaned your back on her door, sliding down it as you sat.

You could hear Tzuyu’s sniffling from behind the door, breathing slightly erratic with slight hiccups.

”Can I tell you a story?” You offer, hoping to calm her down.

You leaned upon the door for a few moments, silence filling your world, before you heard Tzuyu hum a soft agreement.

“There was a boy and a girl. They met at school, the way it usually goes. After a meeting that one would describe as love at first sight, the boy asks the girl out for drinks, an offer she happily accepts. They meet at the bar, have some drinks, and have the time of their lives. The next day, in school, the girl notices a rose in her locker, and she sees the boy at his seat, looking at her with a sweet smile. The plans for a next date were set almost immediately. The boy was an artist, a lyricist even, so every date saw the debut of a new piece, poems, songs or prose, and every piece made the girl fall deeper and deeper” You whisper to the door, a small smile spreading across your face as you recalled the first time you heard this story.

”What happened next?” Tzuyu asked, curious as to why you had suddenly stopped talking.

“Oh right, sorry. Things didn’t go that smoothly. Both of them didn’t come from wealthy families, so after graduation, they struggled to make ends meet, the job market wasn’t exactly accommodating at that point, only the boy getting a job. After months upon months of job hunting, still, the girl found herself unable to find a job. Of course, this made her down on herself, and above all, she felt like a burden, as the boy had taken to taking a part time job outside of his full time one to help settle both his and her expenses while she was just there, woefully unable to get a job.

She let this sadness overtake her, and one day, after yet another rejection letter, the girl felt worlds crash all around her. Feeling like nothing but a failure, the girl felt herself shrivel and sob atop their shared bed. Just as it were, the boy came back, small black box in hand and a huge smile across his face, though it quickly disappeared as he saw the love of his life sobbing on the bed. With reckless abandon, the boy tossed everything aside, safe the black box, then knelt in front of the girl.

“What’s wrong?”, he asked, worried as he quickly cupped her face in his hand, wiping her tears away.

“Why are you still doing this? Just leave me, I’m just deadweight”, she whispered back, distraught as she tried to look away from the boy.

Just the thought of leaving her hurt the boy, and he immediately held her hand, squeezing it to reassure her.

The boy got on one knee, gently cupping her face as he made a promise.

“My love, I may not be wise, and I won’t save the day, but look into my eyes, and know that I’ll always stay”

He promised, placing a tender kiss on her forehead, before looking to the small black box in his hand, opening it to her, making his last promise.

“And my love, I won’t run away.”

The ring wasn’t anything extraordinary of course, he couldn’t afford that no matter how many part time jobs he took. But to the girl, that ring was the most valuable thing in the world.”

“So it’s a happy ending?” Tzuyu’s voice chimed out from behind the door, and you could detect a tinge of hope in her voice.

“Well, it’s happy, but it’s not the ending, not just yet. Soon the girl got a lucky break, an employer with an eye for talent and want for a hard working employee, hired her, and helped nurture the girl into a successful executive. The boy, in the mean time, decided to pursue his passions, successfully becoming a songwriter for several major entertainment companies. Both successful, they shared happiness and bliss, building a home together. Some years later, their home had an addition, they had a child, funny, strange and mild, and their love for their child ran deep. They nurtured their child to be strong, kind, generous, and wanted to give their child a comfortable and safe childhood. The child was rather clumsy though, often unwittingly causing damage around the house. Despite the boy and girl’s attempts to reassure the child that it was okay, and as long as the child was careful the next time that it would be okay, the child began to turn their blame inward, thinking themself a clumsy fool who caused nothing but trouble for the boy and girl. One day, after breaking a rather expensive glass ornament, one that also held significant value to the girl, the girl couldn’t contain herself, while not lashing out, beginning to chide the child, wondering why the child couldn’t be more careful. It was a mistake, one that the girl quickly regretted, but it had left its mark. The child ran up to their room, crying as the girl followed closely behind, whispering a soft sorry.

“Why do you and dad still bother with me, all I do is bring trouble…” The child asked, and the girl quickly held the child close in an embrace.

“You’re not trouble, and even if you were, we’d never leave you…” The girl told the child, then, as the two of them laid in the bed, the girl told the child the story I just told you, Tzu, the story of how the boy and girl met, and the day the boy proposed. After the story, the child looked up at the girl with tears in their eyes, hugging the girl even tighter, as the girl whispered, “it doesn’t matter how you mess up, or how much trouble you cause, we know they’re all accidents, and we’ll never leave you, because we love you, and we always will. Always remember that, my dear dear child.” The girl whispered, before humming a soft lullaby to get the child to sleep.”

“Y/N… that’s a nice story, but…why did you tell me this.” Tzuyu asked, to which you cracked a small smile, sighing as you leaned on the door.

“Tzuyu, I know you think that it’s only a matter of time before I leave, you say it’s safer on your own, you’d rather sleep alone, then grow to need me there, but I hope now you can see, what my mom and dad showed me, because Tzuyu, I promise, I’m not going anywhere. I love you more and more each day, to love, is not to leave, so hear me when I say, my love, that I may not be wise, and I won’t save the day, but look in my eye, and know I’ll always stay. And I won’t run away.” You whispered, before you felt yourself fall backward, falling into Tzuyu’s hold, feeling her hands wrapped around your neck as she pulled you into her embrace.

“It was a nice story.” Tzuyu said, a wide gummy smile across her face, her eyes still tear streaked but the sadness was completely gone from her face. Tightening her hold around you, she leaned in, nuzzling her head in the side of your neck.

She placed a small kiss on your lips, before softly whispering.

“I love you too.”

[that-one-theater-kid]

Calling them “pretty boy”

Featuring! Albedo, Scaramouche, Kazuha,

Notes:MODERN AU! idk, might be ooc, old draft

| Albedo |

Last time you checked the clock it was 11:40 but now as your lover came in the door it was already 3:45.

You came out of your shared room quietly to be greet by Albedo who wasn’t expecting you to still be awake, he jumped a bit when he heard your voice “Finally my pretty boy��s back.”

You could tell the nickname flattered him by the pink hue on his ears “‘M sorry for keeping you up dear”

‘Dear’. He was the only one who could you that, and now you can finally claim a nickname for him ‘pretty boy’. Endearments only you two could call each other, small things no one can take from the both of you.

You slowly approached him by the door side “what took you so long pretty?” You asked him in a hushed voice “Not much really, I just had to finish some research that Lisa needed for the new section in the library, though I could’ve done it at home” ah yes Lisa planned for a new section the library and asked Albedo to do some pieces.

“Have you eaten yet?” You asked “Nope, I wanted to finish the papers early” you expected it so you strolled to the kitchen to heat up some food “it’s not healthy to be restricting bodily needs you know.” “I know, but Lisa seemed persistent that I submit them before the deadline so I had to.” Of course, Lisa was the type to rush things even if it didn’t need to be.

After albedo ate and washed up you both returned to your bedroom. It was always so hard for you to fall asleep sometimes so you sticked some glow in the dark star on your ceiling so you could stare at something pretty most of the time, but now you get to stare at your pretty lover.

| Scaramouche |

Dates with Scara were always so nice no matter where it was, whether it was going out or just a home date it always felt so special from the last.

Today you planned a movie date in your apartment, unfortunately rain had to sweep in. You got worried, wondering where your lover was, did he forget? Is he just running late? So many questions ran through your mind.

But your bubble was bursted after hearing continuous knocking and ringing from your door, only one person you knew knocked like that, your pretty boy, who was all soaking wet from the rain. “Yo loser, sorry I was late, got caught in the rain” he apologized, still standing outside the door “Are you gonna come in or do you want me to shut the door?” You replied jokingly “Shut up” he replied in a sarcastic manner. After drying him off and changing into some spare clothes you always had for him in your bedroom, finally getting to set up on your bed to get the date started.

“You wanna know something?” You asked while picking a movie to watch “No” he replied coldly, but the way he was snuggled in your chest said something else “Aw, is my pretty boy angry?” With the pet name slipping out your mouth his head darted up to look at yours, clearing caught off guard “Wha- No im not! Just.. nothing. Just tell me.” He laid his head back down the hide his flushed face, you could feel the heat on his face. You guys had a fun night for the most part, cuddling, talking, laughing together was enough, He was enough.

| Kazuha |

Quiet time together was a serene activity you both shared once in a while, Kazuha was writing while you were painting, painting him. It was a painting of him, it was a picture of him near a lake from one of your “adventures”. Although it felt like you couldn’t capture the true essence of his beauty, to him it was one of the most beautiful things he’d seen in his life. Well he wasn’t supposed to know that yet. He took a peek when you took a break, it wasn’t a big canvas but it was almost done though, he admired the scenery, the reflection in the water, everything was so.. captivating.

Although his viewing was interrupted when you walked back in, even if he was to awe struck to take his eyes of the painting, let alone to notice you came back. “Wait- you weren’t supposed to see that yet..” you said shyly, the surprise was ruined, it was supposed to be your 1 year anniversary gift, “Why this picture though?” He asked, tilting his head in curiosity “well.. I just thought you looked pretty, thats all.” You answered, but it had a deeper meaning, that day was the first time he said “I love you”, the first time he kissed you.

“Really? You thought I’m pretty..?” He asked, pointing to himself “Of course I do, you’re my pretty boy after all” You admitted, seeing a faint blush on his face from your claim. “Yours? I like that” He kissed your cheek before laying his head on your shoulder, you set aside the canvas and other art materials in order to sit comfortably with him, it was quiet, warm, and serene. It was love.

Did you miss me?🤭🤭😋😋😝😝🫶🫶

[raidenssblog]

Warm hands

Part 1

Pairing: Reiner X reader

Genre: angst

Warnings: mention of murder, breakdowns

Summary: you lived is Shiganshina, when Reiner tore down the wall, he killed your family along with it.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

Thousands of thoughts rushed though his head, only to be pulled out by your voice.

"Reiner? Love you ok?" You said looking worried.

Breathing in deeply he replied

"no, I need to tell you something important. Its about what happened in Shiganshina" your head turned to look at your boyfriend. "yeahhh?" you question.

Reiner struggled to speak for a few seconds before sighing. "the amor titan, the one who tore the wall down, this is gonna sound like im off my head but....the amor titan, was, that was me." he quietly said looking down at the land below. his head shot up when the sound of laughter broke the silence.

"Reiner, please don't joke about that, buttt you did get a laugh out of me. Can you imagine it tho? me loving the guy that destroyed my life? good one babe, lets head in its getting late and we have training tomorrow." you said standing up and descending the wall. Reiner stayed at the top watching you zip past the buildings, guilt still laced his stomach.

'Loving the guy that destroyed my life?' that line replayed in his head for a few minutes before he shook his head and followed your steps back.

"it's better if she believes it's a joke" Bertholdt told Reiner as he was folding up one of his shirts. "You probably shouldn't have even told her. it'll ruin our cover Reiner." he sighed "I guess you're right, but she deserved to know, believing it or not. we killed everyone she loved; she deserved an answer." he said before walking out to the mess hall for breakfast.

before he spotted you, you saw him first walking up to him and grabbing his arm, pulling his outside, out of earshot to the others. "Reiner, I have a question, and I want you to answer it truthfully. were involved with the Shiganshina wall being broken down? I was thinking about what you said last night. please tell me that was a joke and you were pulling my leg?" your eyes had a look of desperation behind them, wanting what he said to be a joke. when he looked down in shame that was all you needed to know.

"Oh my god, oh my fucking god Reiner. you can't be fucking serious!" "Please y/n you need to listen I-" "shut the fuck up Reiner!" you cut him off. "You never thought of telling me!" you were so angry and betrayed you couldn't even understand how the guy you've laid with could become one of.... them. your Reiner, your lover, your best friend.

"I have thought of telling you I just never had the right time too; no moment was good. I didn't want to ruin what we had, I love you too much to let you go and I'm sorry for not telling you. hell, I'm sorry I even did it in the first place but babe you need to hear my side of the story." Reiner swore he could feel his heart in his mouth. it was true, he didn't want to lose you, but after this, he doesn't even know.

"don't babe me Reiner, I trusted you?" your eyes swelled with tears, you turned and headed the other way, Reiner not even trying to stop you. millions of thoughts rushed through your mind, not one about how he could turn in a titan just, everything all at once.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

god this was kind of dog shit but I need to get something out there, ive been so inactive im sorry, school holidays now so yay. this has been in my drafts for like a year......

For @chaos-mix

[manestjerne]

The book of regrets part two

Summary: After you reach a dead end in Latvia, Bucky offers you to stay at his place for the night, but things take the wrong turn.

Word count: 5.6k

Warnings: angst, swearing, crying, PTSD, lying, fear of cats (lmao)

A/N: It's going to an end soon, so don't worry, I'll try to wrap it up.

If you have any ideas for MCU one shots, not only about Bucky, feel free to hmu, I have some free time now and I'd use some inspiration, since my first one came out not that bad.

I suggest part one first.

masterlist

I was sitting on the couch next to Sam when I started going through my bag. Zemo was already waiting for us inside. Maybe he wasn’t fond of how we wanted to deal with the Flag Smashers, but he wouldn’t leave them alone, so for sure he wanted to cooperate for now, waiting for the moment to step in. But we wouldn’t let him, already agreed on that on our way home. Bucky was standing  behind the counter, pouring himself a glass of whisky while looking at me closely, I was surprised he didn’t spill a drop, not paying any attention to the bottle. 

„You ever considered that you might have an alcohol problem?” He rolled his eyes in response. „Alright, so what’s the plan now? We lost them, Capshit America is probably looking for us right now, and well…” 

I didn’t finish the sentence, looking at Bucky and he only nodded at me, understanding what I was talking about. I finally found what I was looking for, taking a bottle of nail polish out from my bag and setting it on a table carelessly, before taking a closer look at the chipped polish on my nails. I saw their confused faces, but totally ignored it, opening the bottle. 

„I asked you a question, morons.”

„I guess we’ll wait for now. There’s nothing else to do.”

Bucky said with a shrug of his shoulder, emptying the glass in two gulps.

„You’re a little crazy, you know that?”

Sam was looking at me closely and I laughed at his words.

„There’s nothing better to do, if we have to wait for now.”

I wanted to say something more, but got quiet as I heard the wind drafting through the apartment. I knew what it meant, and I wasn’t wrong, two silhouettes with spheres appeared in the room not long after.

„Your time is up.”

Ayo said it clearly and calmly. I wasn’t going to argue with her, still believed that Zemo wasn’t so necessary. He deserved whatever they were planning on doing with him next. I didn’t raise my gaze, fully focused on my nails, when I heard the loud footsteps in the hall. Now more intrigued I looked up to see John entering the room. I rolled my eyes with a loud sigh.

„Were you following us? That’s kinda creepy, stalker.” 

John looked around slowly, not sure what’s happening, but he made a big mistake at the beginning. Walking up to Ayo, really closely, he chose to introduce himself, it wasn’t a surprise that she didn’t reply, turning to Bucky they exchanged a few sentences in a language I didn’t understand. 

„John, take your little friend and leave, you don’t want to get involved in this.” 

They both chuckled at my words, not even looking at me, but the next thing he did, could kill him. He put a hand on Ayo’s shoulder, trying to convince her to talk. Big mistake. He was taken to the ground within seconds. I didn’t flinch, knowing it was coming, Bucky’s jaw clenched again when he was looking at the fight scene happening in front of us. Suddenly Battlestar flew over the coffee table I was sitting at, knocking over my polish bottle and landing at my feet.

„I warned you.”

He looked at me disgusted, before getting up and trying to help John, but they were obviously loosing. 

„Bucky…”

Sam stared slowly before they joined in. I finished painting the last nail and took a closer look at what’s happening, when Ayo unattached Bucky’s arm, it felt on the ground with a blank clank. He looked even more surprised than us. Dora Milaje used their chance to immobilize both John and his friend, leaving them panting on the ground. Ayo took a look at the room, I realized someone’s missing. 

„He’s gone.”

It was the only thing she said before they left. The room got quiet again, the exhausted breathing was the only sound filling it up. I got up and walked to Bucky, as he attached his arm back on. 

„You good?”

I wanted to say more, I wanted to help him, but I didn’t know what to say, the whole situation was so unexpected.

„Perfect.” He gave me an annoyed look with these words. „Guess we should go now, there’s nothing else for us to do here if Zemo’s gone.”

I didn’t ask any questions, knowing the situation is not fully handled yet, I decided to just follow them, wherever they were going. 

„Let me take that, your nails aren’t fully dry yet, huh?”

Sam chuckled as I bent down to pick up my bag and I didn’t’t resist. He was laughing, but it wasn’t honest, there was nothing to laugh about. I took a last look at John kneeling on the floor.

„Do you need any help?”

My question made Bucky and Sam turn my way instantly, I could hear their breathing now.

„I’m gonna destroy you. All of you.”

„Well, alright.” I turned my back to him and followed the guys to the exit. 

„Okay, so where exactly are we going? Not that I don’t trust you, but you’re traveling a lot lately.”

Sam smirked at my question, the travel was indeed pretty long. Now we were sitting in a car and I guess we’re pretty close to our destination. 

„Home. We’ll catch up when we know anything.”

„Oh.”

My murmur probably sounded pretty disappointed as they both looked at me surprised. 

„What? You’re going to miss us?”

He teased, but I realized I wasn’t supposed to go home, I told Tony that I’m staying at Nat’s for a whole weekend. 

„No, just…” I didn’t know what to say, I furrowed my brows „Just guess I’d have to stay at Nat’s. Tony won’t believe we got in a fight or something.”

I knew what I just said sounded a little weird for them, but they must’ve figured it out.

„You didn’t tell Tony where you’re going?”

Bucky asked a little worried, he turned his face to look at me again. 

„Yeah, not really, I didn’t have time for that.”

I shrugged my shoulders when he raised an eyebrow. 

„He’s gonna kill me if he knows.”

„Yeah, but he won’t know, I just can’t come home ’till the end of the weekened and you’ll be fine.”

I rolled my eyes, he was so damn annoying just staring at me. 

„He doesn’t hate you, Bucky. He forgave you. A long time ago.”

Now both of his eyebrows were raised, the wrinkles on his forehead more visible than usual. He wasn’t expecting that, but his expression changed quickly. He turned back, not looking at me.

„You can stay at my place, we can get some more info about the little rebellions and try to track them.”

I raised my eyebrow, not sure if he’s joking. 

„Yeah, not such a bad idea.”

I was waiting for his reaction, for a laugh or something, but nothing like that happened, he wasn’t joking. After a few moment of silence Sam bursted out laughing.

„Man, you two are so weird.”

He shook his head slowly.

„Sheets in the bedroom are clean, take the bed and I’ll stay on the couch. Towels are in the drawer under the sink, I don’t have any fancy body washes and you’ll have to stick with a regular shampoo, no conditioner.”

He was saying casually while unlocking the door. I was still processing what I was doing there, just listened closely as he continued.

„The fridge is empty, but I have to go to the bar for a moment, so I’ll step in a supermarket, any special wishes?”

„You have to go to-„ 

I started confused, but when he opened the door a little silhouette slipped between my ankles. I took a few steps back, looking as he kneeled and picked up the snowy white cat, putting it on his shoulder before entering and turning on some lights in the hall. 

„That’s Alpine.”

He tossed his keys on the little table before taking off his shoes. „That’s why I have to go, when I’m away my neighbor comes here to take care of her, I need to tell him that I’m back. Are you coming in?”

He looked at me confused, scratching the cat behind her ears as she stretched lazily in his arms. 

„I didn’t know you have a cat.”

I said walking inside slowly and closing the door behind me. I bent down to take my shoes off as Alpine jumped off his hands and came closer, sniffing me carefully before rubbing her head along my calfs. I froze, too scared to take a step forward. I never told anybody I’m afraid of cats, that’s not healthy. I knew how lovely the little creatures could be, but their teeth and sharp claws always made me feel uneasy. Bucky started laughing at me, before picking her up and walking towards the kitchen, filling her bowl with food as she meowed hungrily. 

„Are you scared of cats? You have to be fucking kidding me.”

„You have a cat? You have to be fucking kidding me.”

He rolled his eyes in amusement, watching as she crunched on her dinner purring softly. 

„Look how adorable she is.”

I couldn’t help but smile to myself. He looked so innocent just standing there, adoring it. Just genially happy about having someone. Something. 

„Okay, I’ll be back in like half an hour.”

He said after we watched Alpine devour her meal in silence. 

„I’m coming with you, I’m not staying here alone with her.”

He shrugged his shoulders and left me without an answer, picking up his keys and heading towards the door. 

„Bucky, wait!” 

I struggled with putting my shoes on, really not wanting to stay here without him. He leaned on the door and watched me with an amused grin.

„It would be easier if you untied the laces, you know that?”

„Oh fuck off.”

I groaned when he held the door open for me. 

„That’s funny, you know?”

I started with a grin.

„What now?”

„Hi James.”

A cute girl polishing glasses behind the bar smiled softly at him. 

„Hi.”

He replied with a smile before lowering his gaze and leaning on the countertop on his forearms. His smile faded as looked at me, I was absolutely amused by their short, yet cute interaction. He rolled his eyes taking a sip of his drink. He only wanted to come in the bar for a second, but when Yori offered us to keep him company, I was more than glad to agree. 

„You act so tough, not caring about anyone, and then you come back to your little kitty and snuggle with her on the couch.”

„He’s not as heartless as you think.” I turned my gaze as he spoke, as amused as I was „He just can’t keep a woman close, but I know deep inside he’s just a little shy.”

He grinned, looking meaningfully at the dark haired girl, before looking at me again. She was still looking at Bucky with a little, cute smile on her lips. 

„No way, you went out with her! You didn’t call? Oh you asshole, she’s so cute.”

I whispered, trying not to look at her. 

„Right?” Yori chuckled softly at my reaction.

„Okay, you two have to stop immediately.”

Bucky was absolutely loosing his shit now, sitting between us. 

„Maybe you’ll have more luck…” 

Yori winked at me, which caused me and Bucky to mumble indistinctly.

„Oh no, no.”

„We’re just friends.”

„Not even friends, we just know each other for a long time.”

„Sure.” He smiled politely at our reaction.  

I got quiet at his words, picking up my glass and staring at the liquor inside before taking a sip. The silence between us got pretty pleasant after a moment, but I still didn’t like it.

„Are you gay?”

I asked out of nowhere, amused smile formed on my lips at his reaction. 

„Alright, that’s enough for you.”

He took my glass and drank whatever was left in it. 

„You’re just so close with the guys, you know. You have so many friends, but I’ve never seen you getting into a closer relationship with a woman.”

„Steve never told you about my youth?”

He raised his eyebrows and I furrowed mine in response, remembering what Steve told me. He was good at that, and it made his friend jealous, all the time. I thought about it for a moment. 

„Okay, my bad, guess the war changed you. Can I get one more?”

I waved at the girl behind the bar and she smiled politely before pouring me a drink.

„It’s not about the war, trust me.”

His smile was surprisingly polite as for the topic. I knew it wasn’t about the war, just didn’t want to make him talk about it. I raised an eyebrow at his answer. 

„Okay kids, I should get going, it’s pretty late for such an old man.”

Yori yawned lazily before getting up. 

„Oh, I believe you’re not the oldest one here.”

I smiled an he patted my shoulder lightly, then winked at Bucky. I shook my head slowly, when he greeted us once again and left. 

„Everything’s closed now, guess we’re not having dinner tonight.”

He wasn’t looking at me, I couldn’t tell if he was blaming me, or just stating the facts.

„Whatever..” I mumbled finishing my drink, the bar was getting less crowded every minute. „Let’s just go if you’re so impatient.”

He rolled his eyes before getting up and reached his hand in my direction to help me off the stool. I was much shorter than him, which meant my legs were swinging in the air all the time, not reaching to the ground. I ignored his gesture and smoothly jumped off my seat. 

I walked out of the shower and went straight to his bedroom. I didn’t argue with him about him taking the couch. I remembered how Steve had trouble sleeping in the bed when he first came out of ice, I guessed it was the same thing here, so there was no need to quarrel. I was squeezing my hair with the towel and pushed the door open slowly, when I saw Alpine sitting on the bed, licking her paw, not even looking at me. I turned back immediately, walking into the living room again. 

„Take your cat from the bed, I’m not sleeping with her.”

He smiled at my reaction.

„She’ll come here in a minute, but it’s basically her bed, so you can’t just throw her out. Are you sure you’re not hungry?”

He looked worried, but I believed it was just my mind, he didn’t really care. 

„I’m fine.”

I turned my back to him, ready to walk away and scare the cat off myself, when he spoke up again. 

„It was easy to get you to sleep here, you should be more careful.”

I faced him absolutely confused, I had no idea what he meant.

„First of all, you’re not a stranger.” I paused for a second, wondering why the hell was he smiling. „And secondly, you asked me to come here only to protect your own ass, you know Tony can’t stay mad at me for too long, but it’s different when it comes to you.”

I walked in the bedroom annoyed by that weird interaction and started to push the cat gently off the bed. 

„Shush, go! Come on, leave!” 

I whispered, making sure he couldn’t hear me from the other room. Alpine gave me a grumpy meow before jumping off and leaving the room through the slightly opened door. I rolled my eyes and went under the covers, throwing my towel on a chair nearby. I sighed loudly and rolled on my back, not tired enough to fall asleep, but not so wide awake do to anything else. I looked around the room, it was decorated nicely. The plants on the window sill, matching perfectly the candles between them. A small desk, covered in neatly organized notes. I took a closer look, these weren’t notes. I stood up from the bed and walked to the desk, sitting on the chair and closing my eyes when it squeaked, hoping it wasn’t loud enough for him to hear. I took the papers in my hands. These were drawings. Bucky had a cat, and used his free time to draw. Surprisingly, they were good drawings. I looked through them making sure to not be too loud, when my phone ringing under the pillow made me jumped in my seat. I dropped the drawings and rushed to pick it up. 

„Nat?”

I whispered confused.

„You okay? You didn’t answer any of my texts today, girl don’t do that again.”

She sighed relieved. 

„Oh yeah, sorry, busy day. I’m staying at Bucky’s place tonight, I’m alright.”

„Why didn’t you just came here?”

She asked offended and I laughed at her reaction. 

„We still haven’t figured it all out, don’t worry Nat, I’m really fine.”

„If you say so.” She sighed again „Just don’t ghost me anymore, or I’ll have to tell Tony where you are.”

„Oh sure, like you’d do that.” I laughed, but I was actually glad she was so worried about me. „Goodnight, we’ll talk tomorrow.”

„Night, love you.”

„Love you more.” 

I replied before hanging up and putting the phone back under my pillow. I pulled the covers up to my chin and closed my eyes, now feeling pretty tired. 

„Who were you talking to?”

Bucky yelled from the other room, but I didn’t reply him, just rolled over and tried to fall asleep. 

I woke up in the middle of the night, struggling with catching a breath. I reached to the lamp gently and turned it on, when I realized it’s just Alpine, sleeping on my chest.

„You have to be fucking kidding me, you little demon.”

I hissed and tried to push her off, but she just purred in response. I froze for a second not sure what to do, so I raised my hand slowly and petted her head. She rolled on her back, now looking at me. She was actually pretty cute, her bright eyes reflecting the soft light from the corner of the room. 

„Okay, let’s go.”

I looked at the clock, it was almost 3am. I tired to get up and not piss her off, but suddenly she stood up and looked through the half-open door. She jumped off the bed without my help, but stopped when she reached the hall, turning my way and meowing loudly. 

„Shh…” I hushed at her. „Just go.”

But she didn’t leave, she was just standing there looking at me, and it freaked me out. 

„Okay, I’ll get myself a glass of water if you insist so much.” I got up lazily „I thought cats aren’t afraid of the dark.”

I stopped for a second, realizing I’m talking to a damn cat. I shook my head and followed her to the kitchen, she gave me one last look before snuggling into Bucky’s side. I poured myself a glass of water, thankful that he sleeps with a light on and I didn’t’t have to walk here in complete darkness. I took a few steps closer to him. I was right, he slept on the floor, but it wasn’t’t anything unexpected. I took a closer look at them, thinking he looks so calm when asleep, but then I realized how hard his fists were clenching. Alpine wasn’t sleeping, just looking at him closely like me. His jaw clenched and he rolled to the side. I took one more step to make sure I’m seeing this right, he just had a nightmare. I was thinking about waking him up, but didn’t want to disturb him. Then I thought again. If I had a nightmare, I’d want someone to wake me up. I kneeled besides him and put my hand on his shoulder gently.

„Hey, Buck.” I whispered „Bucky it’s fine, wake up.”

He sat up rapidly and pushed me away with one, strong swing. I lost my balance, putting my arms behind my back to ground myself when he opened his eyes, absolutely terrified, for a second I thought I saw tears in his eyes. I wasn’t expecting that, backed away a little when he started looking around the room.

„Hey.” I snapped him back to reality „What happened?”

His eyes met mine and I felt a sting in my heart looking at his impression, he was absolutely lost and frightened. I thought it was just a bad dream, but now I knew it’s worse than that.

„Did I hurt you?”

His breath was heavy, his eyes wandering around my body as I was sitting on the floor, pretty close to him.

„No, I’m fine. I’m okay Bucky. What’s wrong?”

He ran his fingers through his hair before answering. I moved a little closer, not wanting to scare him, but trying to reassure him that it’s fine at the same time. 

„Nightmares.”

He mumbled and I jerked my head to the side.

„About HYDRA, huh?”

„I can’t really get rid of them.” He shrugged his shoulders and I stood up to turn on another light, so I could actually see his face while talking. The little lamp wasn’t enough for me to figure out his whole impression. This time I sat down even closer to him, pulled a corner of his blanket to slip it under my thighs.

„Bucky, it’s over. You’re fine and you’re safe. You’re alive, that’s what matters.”

I wanted to comfort him so badly, but I had no idea how.

„Yeah, if you call that living.”

I sighed loudly at his answer. 

„Does anything help you with these nightmares?”

„Not really, they just come and go.” He stopped for a second to think about it. „But there are things that make it worse, I think it’s because of what happened in Madripoor.”

My eyes widened at his answer, visiting Madripoor as an Avenger, with Zemo by your side, couldn’t be a good idea. 

„Okay, get up. That’s gonna be a long talk. DoorDash?”

I got up from the floor and made my way to the kitchen, taking a bottle of whisky and two glasses from the cabinet. 

„You should just go to sleep, I’ll be fine.”

He didn’t move from the floor, taken aback by my reaction, but I just rolled my eyes. 

“I’m fine. Are there any pizza places opened nearby?”

“I guess.”

He shrugged as an answer. I walked back to him and sat on the couch, placing the glasses on the coffee table and filling them up. 

“What happened in Madripoor?”

I asked without waiting for him to join me on the couch. 

“We had to talk to Selby, but you know, people there aren’t quite fond of us, so basically me and Sam had to play some dress up.”

“Oh fuck. Let me guess, if Zemo was the one who came up with this, you were the winter soldier, weren’t you?”

“Yeah.” He sighed, finally getting up from the floor. 

He wanted to say something else, but when he grabbed his phone I let him have the space he needed at the moment. I used that minute of silence to examine his presence. 

He looked tired, but that was not surprising. He looked depressed and crushed, but that also wasn’t anything new. The thing that surprised me, was the T-shirt he was wearing. Since he freed himself from his past, he used to always wear long sleeves, gloves when he was going out. Steve used to scowl about it all the time. He would do anything to not look at the metal arm, the constant reminder of who he used to be. I was surprised by how casual he was about it now.

“But I guess what I did there was pretty useless. She’s dead and the serum is gone.” He threw his phone on the couch. “Our pizza should be here in about half an hour.”

My eyes widened even more as he nearly put these two things in one sentence. 

“Selby is dead? You killed her?”

“No, of course not. Sharon did.”

The shrug of his shoulders made me want to punch him in the face.

“What the fuck Bucky?” I shook my head trying to clear my mind for a second. “I don’t like her.”

I mumbled quietly, trying to focus on what we were really supposed to be talking about.

“She basically saved us.”

“Yeah, whatever.” I rolled my eyes. 

“Is that because you were always jealous of her? Is it about Steve?”

A smile started forming on his lips as he spoke. 

“Okay, you’re the one who always avoid talking about him, so don’t do this now or I’ll wipe that smile right of your face.” I said angrily, but my impression softened when the room was filled with silence again. “I play the piano, you know? That’s pathetic.”

Great way to continue a conversation, good job.

“What?” He gave me a weak laugh, probably not expecting to hear something like that. “It’s not pathetic, maybe not useful either, but still a nice skill to have.”

“I saw your drawings.” I said and bit my lip. He raised an eyebrow but then must’ve realised he left them in a visible place.

“These are not mine.”

He said carelessly, trying to fool me. 

“You wouldn’t keep them if anyone else made them.”

“I’m more sentimental than you think.”

My eyes followed his finger pointing at a small, decorative bowl on the coffee table. I reached inside and went through all the stuff in it, when my fingers met a familiar shape. I pulled my bracelet out slowly and took a closer look. I gave it to him the last time I saw him, together with a note, which surprisingly was resting at the bottom of the bowl too. I took out the crumpled piece of paper and cringed as I read it.

He was messed up pretty bad after the fight with Tony. I made sure everyone was safe before leaving. As I checked his pulse, I gently put it in his pocket, making sure he knows I don’t regret anything, I don’t blame him. The bracelet was made out of amethyst, I got it from my mother as an amulet, it was supposed to just keep me safe. When she passed away I put all my beliefs in that little piece of jewelry, but at that moment I believed he needed it more, I made sure to put that in the note too. 

“I don’t believe in this whole crystal bullshit.” He started slowly when I was still scanning the evidence of him trusting me the whole time. “But I keep it in my pocket whenever I leave.”

“Okay, but don’t try to change the topic, I know these drawings are yours.”

I finally looked at him. I didn’t know what to say about the stuff he kept. I guess I never thought he would do that.

“Sketches, not drawings.”

“I like them.” I smiled as he finally admitted he made them. “Okay, moving on to the part when you said you’re not living. You’re not just existing Bucky, that’s much more.”

He filled our now empty glasses with a loud sigh. 

“So you never regretted what you did? For Steve? I mean, for me basically.”

“Stop avoiding this topic!” I pouted my lip in frustration. “I don’t regret anything, I helped you get your life back, for gods sake!”

“And what kind of life is it, y/n?” He groaned, almost as annoyed as me.

“You’re fucking alive, Bucky. That’s what should matter to you as much as it matter to me. You have your mind back. After all these years you’re free, isn’t it enough?”

I started panicking, nearly stuttering when I was saying that. I couldn’t understand why he can’t appreciate anything he has now. 

“I’m not free. Not at all, everything reminds me of my past. Everything and everyone.” He clenched his metal fist tighter, like he suddenly remembered it’s still there. “I still have to redeem. I’ve hurt so many people, it’s not like I can just forget about it.”

“You were hurt! Why can’t you think about that for once? You were the one suffering for so many years, stripped of your dignity and basically brainwashed. Can you think about yourself for a moment?” I looked him in the eyes as they were getting more glossy with my every word. “Please Bucky, just focus on yourself for once, you deserve it.”

When he finally opened his mouth, the doorbell rang and I could see how relieved he was before getting up. The unbearable silence was disturbed by his footsteps and continued when he came back and tossed the box on the table. I didn’t reach for a slice, even though I was starving. I needed his reply first, knowing I won’t be able to swallow anything now. 

„It’s not that easy.”

I let out an annoyed sigh. Is that really all he can say?

„Was she suffering much?”

He looked puzzled for a second, but caught up pretty easily. I was asking about my mother. I put the bracelet back in the bowl, when I realized I still have it in my hand.

„It was quick.”

He shook his head slowly not looking at me. 

„Was that the deal? Or was she just in the wrong place?”

„There were supposed to be no witnesses. She wasn’t my target.”

„She died thinking I wasn’t safe.” I felt tears in my eyes, I knew I shouldn’t say that, I was supposed to comfort him. But the memories of my past sinked deeper as I thought about it. „I think she knew I'll be fine at some point, that she put all her trust in Tony. I just hope she knows I’m alright now.”

I wiped the tears away with the back of my hand and shrugged my shoulders. I reached for a slice of pizza and left the box open.

„What did he do?” He asked calmly while leaning in to grab a slice himself. „Your father.”

„Well, that’s a long story, not for today. But we have our reasons to care more about mom.”

He nodded slowly, I appreciated he didn’t push. Alpine settled comfortably between my legs and I decided to give it a try, putting my hand on her head and petting her lightly. She purred in response. 

„You deserve a rest Bucky, from your thoughts. You’re not just existing, you can live a life now, just as Steve did.” I paused for a moment, watching his reaction and wishing it wasn’t too much. „I know how it feels, when you think nobody trusts you, but-„

„But he left.” He cut me off, but I let him speak, waiting for him to open up. „Isn’t that a sign of mistrust? You saw what happened there, what Ayo did. They don't trust me, because I don’t deserve it. I don’t know how do you want me to live a life now, when I can’t even trust my own mind.”

„I trust you.” My answer was quick and careless, but absolutely honest. „I came when you called, I stayed here for the night. I trust you. Sam trusts you too. All the Avengers trust you, Buck. Steve left because of Peggy, not to run from you.”

After I got quiet, the room was filled with silence once more. I was impatiently waiting for his answer, caught myself stroking Alpine’s head as I had to do something with my hands. I smiled at her as she stretched and rolled on her back, letting me pet her belly. 

„There’s no reason to not trust you. Your past doesn’t define you, it wasn’t you. We all know that. Just try to accept that.”

„Sam wanted us to come over.” I rolled my eyes as he changed the subject. „Do you maybe want to go see him tomorrow? His sister really does need help.”

My eyes brightened as I realized what’s on his mind. He was just trying to do what I’ve said, believe that people trust him. He wanted to spend more time out of his apartment and chose me to accompany him. 

„Sure.”

I woke up pretty much more tired than I was while falling asleep. Our talk was pretty time consuming, but we had to get up in addition to go see Sam. I burried my face in a pillow before getting up and lazily dragging my feet to the kitchen, hoping coffee would help me survive the day. How surprised I was, when I saw Bucky already sitting on the couch, dressed and showered, with coffee in one hand and a newspaper in the other. He didn’t look at me, but I still tugged on the hem of my shirt, now embarrassed that I just got up and didn’t even change from my pyjama.

„Coffee in the pot is still hot if you want some.” He said turning a page. „You should get ready, I’m not driving at night, it’s your fault you didn’t get much sleep last night.”

I raised my eyebrow and poured myself a cup before turning back his way.

„Are you reading a newspaper? What are you, like 80? Oh, wait…” 

I furrowed my brows with amusement when he finally looked at me.

„We’re not ever going to talk about what happened, are we?”

I asked walking back towards his bedroom to get ready.

„No.” 

His calm answer followed me all the way down the hall.

[0-r-a-y-0]

Overwhelming— Romantic #17

In which: Nick is stressed out with editing and getting closer to going on tour again, Jasper forces him to take a break

This is my oldest draft. I’m so happy I get to finally post it 😭😭 also posted twice in one night 😱😱

Hours after hours, Nick had been staring at his laptop. His headphones plugging into his ears with Melanie Martinez and Doja Cat blasting as he went through and edited videos and created thumbnails; as well as respond to emails. They were about to go on tour again soon, and Nick didn’t want to be editing while sitting on a tour bus. So if he got it all done now, he’d only have to worry about traveling and meeting fans.

But there was a downside to this. He had no time to spend with his boyfriend and brothers since he’s been stuck in his room since he made that decision. Matt and Chris barely see him in the house and he doesn’t remember the last time he talked to Jasper. He felt so stressed and overwhelmed but he didn’t know what to do to relief that stress. And he didn’t know how much longer he could go until he broke.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees his phone light up but he doesn’t care to check it, even though he knows who it is. He sighs, turning his music up louder and getting back to work, focusing ten times harder than he did a second ago.

Without Nick being aware, his bedroom door opens and Jasper slips through. He sees him working and can hear the music through his headphones. He sits next to him and taps Nick on the shoulder, causing him to jump and rip of his headphones off.

“Fuck! You scared the shit out of me!” Nick yells, his hand on his chest.

“You’re still editing?” Jasper asked, laying on his side, his arm propping him up.

“Yeah, I think I’m almost done though. I only have like five videos left.” He answers.

“Hun, you need a break. Your brothers told me you haven’t left your room in days.” The curly haired boy stated.

“That’s not even true. I left like…” Nick trails off to check the time. “Five hours ago to get a snack.”

“Baby, that’s not right. You’ve been working your ass off. Take a break.” Jasper says.

“I can’t. Tour is coming up in two weeks and I need to get everything done so I’m not worn out while I’m meeting fans and performing.” The redhead replies.

“Hun, you have two weeks. A little break isn’t going to affect anything. But if you’re nonstop working, you’re mental health is going to be horrible and you’ll be Murder able during tour, and that’s when you’re supposed to have fun.”

“I know I’m supposed to have fun but I’ll be stressed about this until it’s done and—”

“Nope. No more of that bullshit. You’re breaking out right above your nose and you know what that means when you break out there? It means you’re stressed. And I know you’re overwhelmed because there’s no pimple patches on your face.” Jasper claims. “And you look so tired, baby.”

“Honey, I’m fine. It’s nothing to worry about. How about I finish these five videos and then we can destress or whatever you want to do.” Nick suggested.

“No. We’re doing it now. Everything is so overwhelming for you right now and you need a minute to take a breather.” He confirms. “Shut your computer and put it away.”

Nick sighs, but doing what he’s told. “Good. Okay, now let’s get some food.” Jasper says, pulling him out of bed.

They decide to make Mac n cheese, well Jasper makes it, Nick sits down at the table with his head down. He’s tired, mentally and physically, and he is ready to take a break.

Jasper feeds Nick at the table since he started complaint about how his fingers are beginning to hurt from typing and editing for hours on end. Which, Nick thought it was ridiculous for him to get fed but he wasn’t going to complain about it.

After they eat, they go up to Nick’s room again, where they lay down and watch some of his favorite movies.

“You’re tense.” Jasper comments, rubbing Nick’s shoulder.

“I mean, I guess.” The redhead shrugs like it’s nothing.

“Take your shirt off and lay on your stomach.” He says.

“What?” Nick asked.

“Just do it!” Jasper says.

“Fine.” He replied, sitting up and pulling his shirt off and laying down.

Jasper gets on top of him, rubbing and kneading his shoulders. “Are you giving me a massage?” Nick asked, only to be shushed by Jasper.

“Yes, now be quiet and let me do it! It isn’t helpful if you talk.” He claims, twisting his hair before going back to massaging his shoulders.

Jasper goes on to massage his whole body, his shoulders, then the rest of his arms, his neck and then his back. Minus the low groans and whimpers from satisfaction, Nick stayed mostly silent.

After they’re done, Nick throws his shirt back on and lays down in his bed, feeling more refreshed then ever. “When did you learn how to give massages?” He asked.

“My mom used to give me massages all the time. Like twice a month or something.” Jasper replied, laying beside him and playing with his hair.

“That’s cool. Your mom is cool.” Nick yawns, sinking into his pillow. “I’m tired.”

“I bet you are. Go to sleep, darling, I’m right here.” He tells him, rubbing his cheek.

And with night, Nick drifts off, feeling relaxed and no longer stressed.

[heroofshield]

Whumpcember Day 10- Freezing (Dragon Age 2 FemHawke & Varric)

Takes place during Act 1 before the mission in the Deep Roads.

@whumpcember

--

Growing up in Ferelden, Marian Hawke had experienced her share of cold; especially in Lothering where during the winters the snow could pile up almost to the roof. Escaping to Kirkwall, she'd thought that the winters would be somewhat milder since the city was by the Waking Sea.

She was wrong.

"Maker, this wind is brutal." Marian groused as a gust of wind whistled through the streets, drawing the shawl she had closer around her. "How do you deal with it?"

"Layers. Lots of layer and furs if you can afford it." Varric replied, dodging a pile of near frozen horse droppings. "This isn't even the coldest it's gotten. I remember ten years ago when the harbor froze nearly two miles out. Ice was so thick that you could walk on it no worries. Another time there was a blizzard so bad that it took the city the rest of the winter to dig out."

Marian let out a groan, "Don't say such things, Varric. You're just going to jinx it."

Turning the corner and seeing the entrance to The Hanged Man, Varric just smiled, "It's your second winter in the city, you should be used to it by now."

Marian sighed as they walked into the tavern and the warmth surrounded her like a welcome embrace. Flexing her near frozen fingers, she threaded her way through the crowd towards the stairs and Varric's suite of rooms. Standing in front of the fireplace, she felt her muscles start to warm up and relax. "I don't think I'll ever get used to it."

--

They needed money for firewood.

The winter had been usually cold, at least that was according to those who'd grown up in the city, and they'd had to spend more than usual to keep Gamlen's house heated. So if Marian wouldn't have to dip into the funds she'd been setting aside for Varric's expedition, she needed to take a few jobs. Her reputation working for the smugglers meant that those that knew were approaching her with 'job opportunities' since she knew the best routes in and out of the city to avoid detection. And while Marian knew those guaranteed a payout, she was trying to find more legitimate jobs.

"But those are few and far between. Not everyone wants to work with a Ferelden still." Marian thought as she stared at the household accounts. She'd promised Bethany that she'd take care of Leandra and Carver, and over the past few years she'd realized that that meant she'd have to do things that her younger sister might not have approved of.

"Guess that it's the smuggling jobs until something else comes along." Marian thought as she memorized the details of the job that would get them the coin they needed to get them the firewood that they needed plus some in case the winter decided to stretch itself out.

--

Hawke was missing.

She'd asked Varric if he was up for a quick smuggling job, but he'd replied that he was knees deep in his latest novel and didn't want to stop mid-stream; if he did then who knows if he'd ever finish the draft before his editor started sending daily letters asking where it was.

Hawke had just let out a laugh and said she better get to read it first before he sent it off before bounding down the stairs towards the main floor of the tavern, calling over her shoulder that she'd be back the next day.

"That was yesterday and normally she'd at least stop by to see if she could get a few free drinks from me in exchange for telling me about it for my next serial." Varric thought as he idly tapped the end of his quill against the paper. "She could just be resting at Gamlen's, it snowed pretty awful last night; had to make the mountain pass difficult to get through."

But the feeling in his gut told Varric that something wasn't right.

So he cleaned up his drafts and hightailed it to see Carver, and somewhat discreetly see if Hawke wasn't just sleeping it off, but she wasn't at home so her brother agreed to help look for her. Then it was to the City Centre and the guard's quarters to ask Aveline if she'd seen the quick witted warrior. She hadn't either and reluctantly agreed to join their small party to go hunt down the woman. One last stop in Darktown for Blondie just in case they needed a healer and they were on their way.

In the interest of time, and hoping that Aveline would ignore the fact that they were traveling through smuggling tunnels, Varric decided to use the Merchant's Guild route he knew would get the to the highlands the quickest. Stepping out into the snow covered pass, the cold air slapped Varric's face and he wished he'd brought his fur lined jacket. "Or at the least my shirt that closes all the way up." he thought, trying to suppress a shiver.

Glad for the snowshoes so he wasn't head deep in the snow, Varric called out Hawke's name as loud as he dared without causing an avalanche, "Hawke!"

"If she's unconscious she won't hear us." Aveline said, drawing her cloak tighter around her.

Varric chose to ignore the statement and continued trudging forwards, "Hawke, you out here!?"

"Marian!" Carver called out, narrowing his eyes against the brightness of the snow.

"Hawke! You still owe for those fines last month!" Aveline called out, knowing that if the woman could hear her then she'd protest. But silence greeted them.

"Search the ground for any signs of footprints, there would not be many traveling through here this time of year." Fenris said, starting to scout ahead of the small party.

They fell silent after that, spread out and focused on the ground-hoping for some sign that Hawke was still alive.

After what felt like an eternity, Carver let out a whistle to draw everyone's attention and they made their way towards him. "Look, footprints." He pointed to the ground where an indentation could just be seen. "Looks like they go off in this direction."

Varric looked in the direction that Carver indicated and in the fading sun could just make out the outline of a cave. "Even if it's not her, we need to find shelter soon. Otherwise we'll be icicles when they find us."

"Maybe who ever made the footprints is still in there and can tell us what happened." Aveline said, unslinging her shield from her back and making sure that her sword wasn't hindered by her cloak.

Anders nodded in agreement and readied his staff while Varric got Biance out and Carver made sure that his sword was ready as well.

Inside the cave it was a touch warmer than outside, but not by much. Their breath still created white clouds in the air and Anders created some mage lights so they could see.

What Varric wasn't expecting was for Marian Hawke to be illuminated by said lights; propped up against the cave wall, eyes closed and slumped over herself.

"Maker's kickers." he cursed as Carver sheathed his sword and made a beeline towards his sister. "Blondie, you're up."

Anders nodded, setting his staff against the wall and kneeling opposite of Carver.

Marian was freezing. The snow had been heavier than she'd expected it to be and that had caused all sorts of problems until she'd realized that she'd be stuck in the mountains without any supplies to get her through the cold night. It had been luck that she'd found the cave and had hoped that Carver or someone would miss her enough to come looking.

Feeling warm for the first time since setting out, she opened her eyes expecting to be greeted to the damp of the cave-not the whitewashed walls of a room in Ander's clinic. Confused, she tried to sit up and discovered that she was nearly being held down by multiple blankets.

"You gave us quite a scare."

Marian looked over to see Varric in the doorway, a bowl of something in his hands. "Oh?" she asked in a rough voice. Clearing it, she tried again, "Did I get bitten by wolves and almost turn into a warewolf?"

"Not as dramatic. Nearly became a human icicle though." Varric carefully set the bowl of hot soup on the small nightstand by the cot. "Good thing we brought Blondie along, he said that a few more hours and it would have been off to see the Maker for you."

Marian carefully pushed back the blankets so she could sit up and brushed the stray hairs out of her vision, "At least you missed me enough to go looking for me."

"Y'know Chuckles, if you needed the coin I would've let you borrow it. Didn't have to be so dramatic and nearly freeze to death."

Marian huffed in amusement, "You know me, I have to make a statement. Besides, we'd just gotten out of the smuggling guild-what makes you think I wanted to go into debt right after that?"

"Could've called it an advance on our delving findings." Varric shrugged, knowing that the casual way they were talking was the way they communicated; through jokes and playing it off like it was no big deal. "Unlike the Merchant's Guild I have reasonable terms. At least you wouldn't lose a limb if you couldn't pay it back."

At that Marian let out a laugh and knew the words that they weren't saying. "At that, how can I say no?"

"Just promise next time you decided on a 'quick job' you at least take two other people."

"I promise to cut other people next time."

"Good. Now drink your soup so I can go back to my writing."

[sesamestreep]

the first tuesday in may

A/N: I originally wrote this as a prompt fill and then decided I hated it and wrote something else instead, but I held onto the draft because I liked the concept. After revisiting it and editing it into something not completely mortifying to read, I decided to post it after all. Double prompt fill! What a time to be alive! (posted to AO3 here)

Sloan thinks she is uniquely terrible at being a famous person. Not that she gets into trouble as a public figure all that often (trouble finds her with alarming frequency, but she does her best not to court it, at least), but rather that she doesn’t care about a lot of the things she thinks she’s supposed to as a celebrity. If she had her way, she could work at ACN, be on several new programs a day as an anchor, and still somehow not be recognizable at all. This doesn’t make sense to her friends and family. She understands that, on paper, it doesn’t make much sense at all. If she wanted to be some anonymous economist, she simply should not have agreed to ever be on television. She’d chosen this life instead. Some days, she still can't figure out why.

All of this is to say, she never really anticipated being invited to the Met Gala. Honestly, she hadn’t even heard of it until she started working with Mac and even then, she didn’t think about it much. She does like fashion, though, and she likes museums in a theoretical way where she wants them to exist and have funding but she also gets bored after 15 minutes in even the more interesting ones. The fervor and fanaticism around the Met Gala, though, had surprised her and then intimidated her, in that order, when she’d gotten her invitation. But a designer had agreed to dress her and she��d managed to walk the red carpet without falling on her face and she’s pretty sure she didn’t say anything to a reporter that she’ll regret, which means the night was an unmitigated success for her. The thing she’s really worried about is how her colleagues at ACN will react the day after. She’s ultimately more nervous about the first Tuesday in May than she was about the first Monday.

Despite her preparation for commentary and possibly mockery from her co-workers, the morning fortunately passes without incident. By the time she’s finished with the 12 o’clock show, though, most of the staff for the prime time shows have started to trickle in and, truthfully, it’s them she’s most anxious about. Neal is the first to say something, but because it’s Neal, it’s also the cheeriest possible comment she could ever hope for.

“Saw pics from the Met Gala last night,” he says, as she passes by his desk. He doesn’t even take his eyes off his computer in order to say it. “You looked amazing. How many best dressed lists did you make?”

“I haven’t checked,” Sloan replies, with a slight eye roll. “I’m guessing very few.”

“No way.”

“There was some debate over whether I dressed properly to the theme.”

“Yes, but that’s what people love about the Met Gala. The debate is the fun part!”

“If you say so.”

“Regardless, me and all the other brave soldiers on Sloan Sabbith stan Twitter have your back.”

“I know what most of those words mean individually and yet, together, they’re a mystery to me.”

“So, a ‘stan’ is actually—”

“Oh, no. I’d like it to remain a mystery, thanks.”

Neal clamps his mouth shut with an amused expression. “Suit yourself.”

“I appreciate the loyalty, though,” she calls over her shoulder, as she makes her way to Mac’s office.

“Always!”

Her knock on Mac’s door is immediately met with an invitation to come in, but she hesitates in the doorway when she sees Will there already.

“I can come back…”

“Not at all,” Mac says, waving her in. “Will and I were discussing what to do with your segment for tonight’s show as it is.”

“We have so many options for what to discuss,” Will says brightly, “since you missed last night’s show.”

Sloan sighs. “Okay, I knew this was coming…”

“Did you have fun at your fancy party? With all your celebrity friends? While the rest of us were working?”

“First of all, Charlie approved it, and I was there representing ACN, so I was working, thank you very much,” she replies, crossing her arms over her chest. “And secondly, you’ve been to the Met Gala like five times! Don’t take it out on me that you got snubbed this year!”

“Why would they want me there, when they can have someone younger and more beautiful?”

“Yes, it’s that and not your feud with Anna Wintour that prevented you being invited,” Mac says, giving him an arch look.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Will says, spreading his hands out in a wide, innocent gesture.

Sloan, for her part, is delighted. “What did you do, Will?”

“Nothing!”

Mac snorts. “He called her a shrew at Anderson Cooper’s birthday party three years ago.”

“That’s not true,” Will shouts. “How did you even know about that?”

“He told everyone at CNN about it,” she replies, looking down at the papers strewn about her desk, like this subject is boring her completely.

“I did not call her a shrew,” Will says, this time to Sloan. “I would not say that about anyone, even if they deserved it, like Anna Wintour very clearly does.”

“He was very drunk at the time,” Mac says, also to Sloan, over-pronouncing the words like she’s speaking about a child. “He doesn’t remember.”

This, at the very least, does make Will look sheepish. “I wouldn’t say it, even drunk,” he insists, though he doesn’t sound quite so confident anymore. “But I think we can all agree that her reaction is not unlike how a total shrew would behave.”

“Just apologize to her, dude,” Sloan says, leaning on the available chair in front of Mac’s desk, rather than sitting in it like a normal person. 

“Don’t call me ‘dude,’” Will says, pointing a warning finger in her direction. “And I’m not going to apologize for something that I never did in the first place.”

“Allegedly,” Mac says.

“Shut up,” Will shoots back.

“I’m just saying, if you smoothed things over with Anna, you and I could be Met Gala buddies next year.”

Will looks incredulous. “Oh, it’s ‘Anna’ now, is it?”

“Well, yeah. We really bonded on the dance floor when Bruno Mars was playing.”

Will makes a disgusted sound, while Mac hides her smile in her fist. “Leona must have been in heaven,” she says, tactfully trying to move the conversation in another direction. “She loves Bruno Mars.”

“She was. I think she invited him to her birthday party next weekend. Reese looked like he was going to burst a blood vessel.”

“Leona’s birthday was in March,” Will says, frowning.

“I know,” Sloan says, patiently. “Do the math on that one quicker, Will.”

Will’s face clears with comprehension. “Poor Reese,” he says, shaking his head. “Anyway, now that we’re done gossiping about our country’s elite and their posh exploits at an event designed to market luxury brands to those who will never be able to afford them, we should talk about tonight’s show, which will be dedicated to the working class, the average citizen, and the—”

“And the suit you’ll be wearing will be custom Armani,” Mac interjects, unimpressed. “Nice try, farm boy.”

Half an hour later, Sloan emerges from the meeting with her topic for her segment on Will’s show settled and makes a beeline for her office, praying that she’s already been accosted by everyone who cares about the Met Gala and she can make it through the rest of the day in peace. Unfortunately, she’s not so lucky. 

Kendra offers her some polite praise on her dress in passing, which prompts Martin and Gary to do a quick Google search while she’s standing right there. It’s a new form of torture she was not remotely prepared for.

“Woah,” Gary says, artless as always. “You look glam, Sloan.”

“That’s kind of the point,” she replies, fighting the urge to fidget. 

“Did you meet anyone cool?” Martin asks, and she disappoints him by saying she didn’t. He then swivels his monitor towards her so she can see a picture of her talking to Bradley Cooper, which she fully doesn’t remember happening. When she just shrugs, Martin looks crestfallen and she takes that as her cue to leave.

Later on, when she’s walking through the bullpen after a meeting with Zane, Jenna stops her to say how much she loved her dress and to ask if Bruno Mars was nice in person, which leads to a repeat of the same situation as before, except now it’s Maggie and Jim googling her in front of her.

“I didn’t really talk to him much,” she says, keeping an eye on the others. Jenna’s clearly disappointed by this answer, so she adds, “But that’s only because he made a point of talking to everybody.”

“That’s so cool,” Jenna gushes, mollified at last. “He seems so down to earth, you know?”

“Uh, yeah,” Sloan says, vaguely. She definitely should have paid more attention to who she talked to last night. She was too busy praying to every god she could think of that Bruno Mars would become Reese’s new stepdad to retain any details of her actual conversation with him.

“Wow,” Jim says. “That’s a lot.”

Maggie fixes him with a glare. “Don’t be an asshole,” she says, with real fire. “Sloan, you look beautiful.”

“Oh, thanks,” Sloan replies, shrugging. “It’s like a costume party, kind of, so it’s supposed to be over the top.”

Jim, for his part, looks embarrassed. “I wasn’t trying to be rude! You know that I think you’re beautiful too, Sloan. I was just saying—”

“You think she’s beautiful?” Maggie asks, lightly. Too lightly. It’s the most obvious thing Sloan has ever heard, and she’s intimately familiar with being too obvious with people she likes.

“Yeah, I mean. Clearly,” Jim says, scratching his neck and (if Sloan’s not mistaken) wishing he’d never been born. “She’s—you’re very beautiful, Sloan, in a textbook kind of way.”

Sloan and Jenna wince simultaneously, and Maggie’s head swivels sharply to stare down Jim even more intensely. “What is that supposed to mean?” she asks, and Sloan gets the vague sense that she’s handed them another convenient reason to pretend to hate each other for the day.

“Nothing,” Jim practically shouts. “Sloan’s beautiful. But like, you know, she doesn’t need all this—” he waves a hand in the direction of Maggie’s monitor, presumably at the photo of Sloan on the red carpet—“to be beautiful. I think she looks nice in real life, when she’s more natural.”

“Oh, right,” Maggie replies with an eye roll. “You’re one of those guys who likes women when they wear no makeup, right?”

Jim looks over to Sloan and Jenna, who are watching this disaster unfold with stone faced solemnity. Sloan tries to convey with just her eyes that he needs to stand down or get his ass handed to him, but it definitely doesn’t come through. He decides to dig his own grave, instead.

“Yeah, I mean, that’s preferable, isn’t it?”

“How much makeup is Jenna wearing right now?” Maggie asks, smelling blood in the water.

“Uh, none. Right?”

Maggie swings her gaze over to Jenna. “Is that true?” 

“No,” Jenna says, with another sympathetic wince.

“How many products did you use to get ready this morning?”

Jenna sighs. “Twelve.”

“No fucking way,” Jim says, staring at Jenna like he’ll suddenly unlock x-ray vision somehow. 

“Women have to put so much effort into their appearance just to look like what men think of as ‘natural,’” Maggie says, truly on a roll now. “And then men like you criticize women who wear makeup that looks ‘over the top’ or ‘obvious’. It’s like we can’t win!”

“To be fair,” Sloan attempts to interject, “I don’t think Jim meant—”

Jim doesn’t take the assist, because he interrupts to yell, “I don’t see how it’s my fault that beauty standards—!”

“I wasn’t saying it was your fault,” Maggie replies, hotly, “just that you’re part of the problem.”

“Oh, yeah, because that’s so much better!”

Sloan gives Jenna a sympathetic shoulder pat, as she delicately makes her exit. Jim and Maggie will be at each other’s throats until they run out of oxygen, and she doesn’t need to wait around for that. Unfortunately, Jenna, as an intern, probably will. She returns once again to the peace and quiet of her office. 

Getting ready for Market Wrap-Up at four o’clock, she gets into a conversation with the make-up artist—not the usual girl, who’s out with what she suspects is strep throat—about the gala, what it’s like to attend, if the exhibit is any good this year, which are questions Sloan is more happy to answer. No, she didn’t get to keep anything she wore. Yes, she was worried she was going to fall on those stairs. No, she didn’t bring a date.

This last answer seems to displease the woman. “If I was dating someone off the New York Giants, I’d make sure everyone knew,” she says, as she dabs mattifying concealer on Sloan’s nose. It’s to reduce shininess from sweating under the intense studio lights, Sloan knows, but she can’t help regretting the way it obscures her freckles too. 

“I’m not…dating anyone on the New York Giants,” Sloan says, carefully.

“Oh, don’t worry! I’m not going to tell TMZ. You don’t have to pretend for my benefit.”

“I’m not pretending. I’m really not dating anyone from the Giants. Or any other NFL team, for that matter.”

“So, who are you dating, then?” the woman asks, with a knowing sparkle in her eye.

Sloan shrugs. “No one.”

“That’s too bad. You’re pretty. You should be dating someone.”

Sloan wants to object to that assessment, or the overly familiar way this woman she doesn’t know is talking about her love life, but she can’t muster the energy. She’s been on a string of bad dates lately, including one with, yes, a New York Giant, but none of them had come to anything. She’s officially too old to consider second dates with men who can’t be bothered to ask her a single question all night long. And there’s the recent experience with having her private photos leaked by an ex that she’s still reeling from. Overall, her wariness is probably not unwarranted. That doesn’t dispel the loneliness of it all, though.

“Do you think I look old?” Sloan asks, suddenly.

The makeup artist does a gratifying double take, looking back and forth between Sloan in real life and Sloan in the mirror. “Girl, where are you seeing that?” she asks.

“Not here,” Sloan says. “I saw the pictures of me from the event and I just thought I looked tired and old. I don’t know.”

“Absolutely not,” this woman she barely knows says with more confidence than Sloan can imagine having. “Don’t do that. You look amazing. There is nothing wrong with looking your age, but you sure as hell do not look old. Don’t do that!”

“You’re right. I just—”

The woman adjusts Sloan’s head so she’s looking straight into the mirror. “Honey, if you can’t even have confidence in yourself, the rest of us are definitely in trouble.”

That is enough to startle a laugh out of her, though she hides it by looking down at her lap. “Thank you,” Sloan says, feeling far too raw about it. “I…did I even ask for your name when we got started?”

“You didn’t, but it’s Mika.”

“Thank you, Mika. I appreciate it.”

“Don’t mention it,” Mika says, like it really is nothing to her, as she touches up Sloan’s eyeliner with a deft hand.

It’s a couple hours after that, when Sloan is frantically trying to put the finishing touches on her segment for Will’s show, that she remembers she left some of her notes from their meeting behind in the green room. In her rush to go grab them, she nearly collides with Elliot as he’s leaving the room with Don in tow. 

“God, did you get taller?” she gripes, as their almost run-in just brings her attention to the fact that she only comes up to his sternum.

“Nice to see you too, Sloan,” Elliot replies, elegantly side-stepping her. “Rough day?”

She glowers at him. “No. Why?”

“I thought maybe you might have indulged in too much champagne with Rihanna last night or something.”

“I didn’t meet Rihanna,” Sloan says, rolling her eyes. Though, given her Bradley Cooper slip-up earlier, she honestly isn’t even sure that’s true. “And I’m not hungover at work, thank you very much.”

“Just a joke,” Elliot says, holding his hands up in surrender. “My wife wanted me to tell you she thought your dress was beautiful. She’s obsessed with Vivienne Westwood.”

“Oh,” Sloan says, caught off guard by this praise. Elliot’s wife is so much cooler than him. “That’s so nice.”

“You didn’t get to meet her, did you?”

“Very briefly, but all my meetings and fittings were with her people, unfortunately. She was nice, though, when we did meet.”

Elliot smiles. “I’ll tell her. She’ll be so jealous. She really wanted to get married in one of her dresses, but it wasn’t really in the budget back then.”

“Next time we have an office party or something, tell her to come pester me with questions.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I’d love that.”

“You’re the best, Sloan,” Elliot practically shouts, as he makes his way down the hall, leaving her and Don alone together.

If she’s being honest with herself (which she tries to do as infrequently as possible), it’s Don’s opinion of the whole Met Gala thing she’s most worried about. Unlike some other people here—she thinks of Mac and Will, specifically—Don doesn’t bother to pretend that he’s above paying attention to the less highbrow items that make the news, but given that he’s also a straight man who wears the same five flannel button-ups to work on a regular rotation, he might be above caring about news that pertains to fashion. He might think the whole thing is stupid, which is the way Sloan wishes she felt. She can’t go in for some of the more avant-garde and impractical sides of haute couture, but she likes a well-made, properly fitted, beautiful piece of clothing as much as any sane person does. Her favorite outfit might be jeans and a hoodie, but she can also appreciate the work that goes into those couture gowns even she, an actual celebrity like it or not, will never have occasion to wear. So, yes, she’s bracing herself for Don’s opinion, provided he has one. Which, obviously, he does, because he’s Don.

“Allow me to be easily the 150th person to tell you that you looked beautiful last night,” Don says, after they’ve been quietly standing there like idiots for a few minutes. Sloan is already in the process of scoffing, when he interrupts to ask, “Did you have fun?”

Sloan makes a helpless gesture with her hands. “I guess…?”

“You guess?”

“It’s…really overwhelming. And exciting! But loud. And there’s so many people and they’re all taking photos. And I had to be careful not to crush my dress when I sat down, so that was awkward. But it really was cool! Seeing the exhibit while the museum was closed was awesome.”

“I bet. Whenever my sister visits the city, she always drags me to some new exhibit at the Met. If I ever win the lottery, I figured I’d rent the place out for her for a big birthday or something.”

“That’s…” Not adorable. Not sweet. Not I’d love to meet this sister I’ve never heard of before next time she’s in town. Has she ever been shown around the Met by someone who saw the exhibit while Gisele Bundchen was six feet away, because I’d be happy to— “That would be such a good idea.”

Don smiles, and his eyes do that thing where they crinkle at the corners. “Well, cross your fingers I win the Powerball soon.”

Sloan very dorkily crosses her actual fingers, making him laugh. “Maybe then they’d let you go to the Met Gala,” she says, like a stupid idiot.

Luckily, Don just laughs again. “Oh, I don’t think they’d ever admit the likes of me.”

“No?” Sloan tries to picture it and fails. Don on a red carpet doesn’t make a lot of sense, if she’s being honest. He has that behind-the-scenes energy, that frustrated stage manager from high school theater aura that he just can’t shake. Still, she can’t help thinking that she would have had more fun if he were there with her, which is a line of thought she’s not allowed to pursue any further. 

“I don’t think schlubby E.P.s of poorly rated cable news programs are ever going to drive viewers to Vogue’s website, even if they happened to be independently wealthy,” he says, plainly.

“You’re not schlubby,” Sloan objects before she can collect her wits. She feels a little bit of Mika’s ire from before when Sloan called herself tired-looking hearing Don put himself down. “Don’t say that.”

He waves her off. “Either way, I have a hard time imagining it will ever be an issue for me.”

“Too bad,” she replies, too incensed to be cautious. “I can’t help feeling like the event would have been way more fun with a buddy.”

He looks at her, in that Don way of his, like he’s running diagnostics or something. Like he’s reading her thoughts and intentions and trying to figure out what the fuck to do with them. Hell, she knows they’ve both been through a lot lately, especially where their love lives are concerned, but how many times can she make her interest clear before they confront the damn thing? 

“But then you’d have to rent a tux, of course,” she says, when the silence stretches too long and she loses her nerve. “And who wants to do that?”

“Well, that won’t be an issue either,” he says, looking at her seriously. 

“Right, of course! I was—”

“I mean, I already own one,” Don says, cutting her off. 

“Oh. Well. That is…good to know for, um…well…”

“Future reference?” he suggests, eyebrow raised inquisitively.

“Yeah, for future reference. Exactly. Just in case I ever, um…”

“In case you ever need a date.”

“Right,” Sloan says, feeling insane. “Like at the last minute or something like that.”

“Yeah,” Don says with a smile. “Something like that.”

“Well, I’ll keep you in mind.”

“That’s all I ask.”

Sloan entertains several bad ideas at once, ranging from making up a wedding she needs a date for this summer so she can see him in this tux he supposedly owns to desperately admitting he doesn’t need to ask her to keep him in mind, that she thinks about him all the time, that she hasn’t figured out how to stop thinking about him yet, but she ultimately manages to keep her cool with great effort. For someone who was anxious to confront this thing between them a moment ago, she’s not doing very much confronting right now. In fact, she’s trying to figure out a way to get out of this conversation as fast as possible so she can retreat to the safety and seclusion of her own office again and regain some damn equilibrium. But they’re in too deep now to cut and run without making things even more awkward. She’s stuck.

“Don, thank God!” Mac exclaims as she rounds the corner, startling them both. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere!”

“I just finished a meeting with Elliott,” he says, taking his eyes off Sloan belatedly and managing to sound normal and casual as he does so. Maybe he’s not managing anything. Maybe he feels normal and casual. Maybe Sloan is the only one freaking out. “What’s up?”

“I had a question about—sorry, I’m not interrupting, am I?” Mac asks, seeming to only notice Sloan just then.

Don, of course, being an unholy plague on her peace of mind, looks over at Sloan, as if to pass the onus of answering Mac’s question on to her. Why couldn’t she develop feelings for someone nice? Why did it have to be Don, who’s tough and perceptive and smart, but stubborn and self-effacing and impossible at the same time? Couldn’t it have been someone easier and more laidback and more straightforward? Then again, even as she thinks it, she finds herself growing bored of this hypothetical person. She wants Don, even if it’s a bad idea, but she’s not ready to say it out loud just yet. Not again. The last time had nearly killed her.

“No,” she says, pasting on a smile for Mac’s benefit and hoping it’s enough to fool someone who knows her so well. “Nothing important.”

“Oh, good. You have a second to talk, then, Don?”

“Yeah, sure,” he says, with an easy shrug. “Let’s go to my office.”

“See you in a few, Mac,” Sloan chimes in, as she ducks around them to sneak into the green room.

Don doesn’t let her off the hook that easily, though, because he turns at the last second and says her name, pulling her attention back to him. When she meets his eye, he says, simply, “I meant what I said before, Sloan. I’m here, if you want me.”

With Mac watching them like a hawk, Sloan can’t acknowledge that with much more than a nod. “I know,” she says, too softly for someone trying to be casual. It must be enough for Don, though, because he nods too and heads off with a bemused looking Mac. Sloan is sure, if nothing else, that Don can be trusted to distract Mac with work talk and that whatever just happened between them is safe with him. He would never give her away like that, not even to Mac. When she turns back to the room and catches sight of her flushed cheeks and bright eyes in the mirrors that line the walls, though, she’s not convinced their secret will be safe with her for very long. 

[browniesarethebest]

I’m just absolutely in love w ur reverse batfam au! I’d love to see the first time one of the rogues meets Robin. Like, who is this brightly colored child that just did a crazy flip and laughed while kicking my goon in the head???

Aw thank you! Here you go!

Note: This has been in my drafts forever and I am so sorry for that. It's been a very hectic time.

"All right, are you ready?" Spoiler asked as she put her hood up.

"Yes!" Robin replied, bouncing from foot to foot impatiently. He had been out as Robin before, but only to take out a couple of two-bit thugs. With the recent Arkham breakout, however, it was all hands on deck, and Dick thought there wasn't a better time for him to finally fight a Rogue. Of course, they wouldn't be sending him to one like the Joker, but Dick didn't really care who he got to fight as long as he did get to finally fight a Rogue.

...Okay, so maybe he didn't want someone like Condiment King, but Dick was pretty sure they were sending him after the Riddler.

Dick was decked out in his Robin costume, which was a fight to get made the way he wanted. He had on his red, short-sleeved tunic, but had to compromise with shorts rather than the actual leotard. He refused to wear pants, and the Bats refused to send him out in what Jason called "scaly, green panties." His outfit was completed with green boots and a bright yellow cape.

It was much brighter than any of the other Bats' costumes, but Dick didn't care. These were the Graysons' colors, and he was going to make his parents proud.

Stephanie came up and clapped him on the shoulder. "You're with me tonight." She leaned down and whispered loudly into his ear. "Damian and I had to rock, paper, scissors for it."

Robin giggled. "And he lost?" He looked over to Shadowbat, who was glowering at the distress signals that lit up the map of Gotham.

"I'm never letting him live it down," she replied, grinning.

Once everyone was suited up and had their assignments, Robin hopped on the back of Steph's motorcycle, whooping with delight as they sped out of the Cave. The Riddler had been last seen by the docks—how cliche—and it took all of Dick's restraint to not bounce right off the seat before they got there. As soon as Spoiler parked, Dick was flipping off the bike and once again bouncing from foot to foot with impatience. Steph put a hand on his shoulder to still the boy.

"I know you're excited," she said softly. "But this is serious. I need you to bring your A-game. Think you can do that for me?"

Robin nodded eagerly before trying to school his face into a more serious expression. Spoiler suppressed a smile as the boy clearly failed.

"All right, let's go."

They snuck into the warehouse Riddler was last seen in carefully. It was pitch black, so Spoiler and Robin switched to night vision. They were quickly blinded as the lights switched on.

"Riddle me this! I open up to let you through. I can be a clever trick or the means to your doom."

"A trapdoor!" Spoiler grabbed Robin and shot her grapple towards the ceiling just as a trapdoor opened beneath them. She swung them to safety and set Robin down as the Riddler's cackle filled the room.

"I am always around but unseen. I am often avoided but never outrun. I could find you at the end of the road or even the next corner. What am I?"

Robin bounced up and down with his hand raised. "Oh! Oh! I know this one! It's Death!" He turned to Spoiler with a grin. "I read that in my book of riddles I got at the Scholastic book fair."

The Riddler had gone silent as Stephanie attempted to hold in her snort.

"...Is that a fucking five-year-old?"

"Hey!"

"Never mind that! The kindergartner is correct! Prepare to die!"

Goons flooded into the room and surrounded the duo. Spoiler's heart skipped a beat, feeling nervous for the first time in a while. She knew Dick was prepared, but she couldn't help but worry for him. The Riddler was right—Dick was just a child. Though he wasn't quite as young as Riddler thought, his youth still jumped out at Stephanie.

She took a deep breath and clenched her fists. She could feel Robin tensing behind her.

He could do this.

And he did.

The fight wasn't easy—it never was with disproportionate numbers, but Spoiler and Robin prevailed. Her heart bloomed with pride as they worked together to take down Riddler's goons, just as they had practiced. She could sense the henchmen's confusion as Dick flipped, kicked, and cackled. It wasn't exactly the first time they had fought one of Batman's children, but none of them had been quite like Robin.

Damian had been like a shadow in the night (no pun intended)—silent, quick, and almost deadly. The criminals of Gotham had referred to him as a demon. Tim had been wise-cracking but efficient. Jason had probably been the closest in similarity to Dick, but he still hadn't quite had the grace and flexibility that the younger boy possessed.

Not to mention that they had all been older than Dick when they started.

She could see a few men hesitate to hit Robin when he was in range—not that the boy would have let them. Spoiler could tell that Dick was aware of his surroundings. She could also see how Robin's cackles unnerved others and the glee Dick took in causing that.

Soon enough, the last goon was knocked out, and Spoiler and Robin moved further into the warehouse. There were many more riddles and traps for them to get through, but Stephanie was always the best one at solving riddles (besides Batman), and that riddle book Dick had bought seemed to come in handy as well. It wasn't long before Spoiler was breaking down the door to the Riddler's control room. The man scrambled out of his chair and bolted for the hidden exit, but he was stopped as Robin launched towards him from Spoiler's shoulders.

"Riddle me this! What's black, blue, and green all over?" the boy called out before delivering a swift kick to the Riddler's face and knocking the man to the floor. "You after I kick your butt!"

The Riddler stared up at Robin incredulously as he held his bruised jaw. "Seriously?!"

Robin smirked as he put his hands on his hips. "Looks like you got your ass kicked by a third-grader!"

The Riddler stared at Spoiler, who grinned in response. "You heard the kid."

Spoiler cuffed the Riddler and led him out just in time for a couple of squad cars to pull up. The officers paused briefly at the sight of the boy in traffic light colors but were able to shrug it off. The Bats were psycho but they knew what they were doing. For all the officers knew, this kid was probably a demon in disguise.

Spoiler and Robin were perched on a warehouse rooftop as they watched as the Riddler was loaded in and driven back to Arkham. Robin was vibrating with excitement as he turned to face her.

"So did I do good tonight? I did, right? Wasn't I so cool? I was like 'Bam! Pow! Riddle me this, Riddler!'" He punched and kicked the air as he spoke but stilled at Spoiler's hand on his shoulder.

"You did great tonight. I'm so proud of you."

Robin beamed before grinning sheepishly. "Just don't tell Agent A I said 'ass,' okay?"

"Cross my heart and hope to die," Stephanie replied, holding out her fist. "Sibling honor, little dude."

Dick bumped her fist. "Sibling honor!"

"Now what do you say we get some post-fight milkshakes before we join up with the others?"

"Yeah!"

[bisamwilson]

23, sambucky :)

#23: ...in relief

(this is in the hey princess verse but you don’t really need knowledge of it to understand this)

Sam isn’t panicking.

He isn’t, really. Sure, he’d spent half the night frantically writing and rewriting his big speech for the new refugee center’s ribbon cutting today, finally crawling into bed about two hours before his morning wake up call, and sure, he’d apparently left both his full speech draft and all of his notecards at home, but he’s not panicking.

He’s understandably nervous is all. There’s nothing wrong with a good bit of pacing every now and again. It builds character or something. One of his mentors had probably told him that once.

"You're panicking," Peggy says, rather unhelpfully, her arms crossed across her chest and her brow furrowing the way it always does when she's worried. She catches him by the shoulders and forces him to stop pacing. "Breathe, Sam. In for eight and out for ten."

That phrase had been a constant in the early days, back when Sam was sixteen and also had just been informed he was actually a prince of a country that was barely a speck on the map. It had never quite worked as well as both himself and Peggy had hoped it would, but he'd always tried anyway.

He breathes in for eight, counting in Arabic as an added distraction, and breathes back out for ten in French.

It works about as well as it had six years ago.

He does stop pacing, though, so he supposes that counts as progress.

"I am entirely too sleep deprived to come up with a speech on the spot," Sam says, replacing his pacing with his second favorite pastime when not-panicking: listing out all the ways he's probably fucked. "I could have someone get my speech and my notecards, but the castle is twenty minutes away at least, not including rushing into my office to grab them and getting into a car, and I'm on in five minutes."

"And because you're on in five minutes, you don't have time to write a new one," Peggy finishes, because she has the same horrible coping mechanisms that he does. "You could postpone?"

Sam gives her an unamused look and shakes his head. "They've been waiting long enough for this. I'm not going to make them wait even longer because I couldn't remember to grab a single notebook this morning. I could always say something generic and just let Karli know beforehand what the deal is, let her use her original speech draft that's longer."

Peggy sighs. "If you don't want to delay, that is probably the best option." She puts a comforting hand on Sam's shoulder and squeezes. "I'm sorry, Sam. I know how much this means to you."

Sam just barely refrains from rubbing his eyes in mild frustration, remembering only at the last minute his makeup team had added a bit of eye makeup today for the sake of the cameras. He wrings his hands together instead and tries to think of a reply that isn't, "Yeah, this sucks."

The door to the small room they're in opens before he can think of one, and Sam jumps, not expecting the go-time signal for another five minutes.

He relaxes when he sees Bucky's head pop through the door, hair braided back elegantly the way it only ever is for special occasions, and wearing a dark gray suit.

"Hey, princess," he says, slipping through the doorway without letting it open enough for paparazzi to see through. He's holding a ratty spiral notebook in one hand and an index card holder in the other, and if Sam didn't have to worry about looking ruffled in front of the cameras, he'd kiss him senseless. "Did you need these? Thought I'd grab them on my way out, but didn't know if you had extras with you."

Sam closes his eyes and breathes deeply before crossing the room and plucking the notebook out of Bucky's hands, holding it tightly to his chest. He cups Bucky's cheek with his free hand and uses it to tilt his face down, kissing him easily and gently, careful not to mess up any of his own makeup.

"Thanks, baby," he says softly, pulling back and taking the index cards as well. "Remind me to write my speech on Google docs next time instead of on index cards I can leave at home."

Bucky laughs. "Or you could go to bed early enough you won't forget them next time."

Sam shakes his head as he looks through his index cards. "I make no promises."

Years later, when Sam can't find his index cards in any of the pockets of his impeccably tailored white tux, Bucky pulls them out of his own breast pocket with a smile.

send me a ship and a number and i'll write a kiss!

[basuralindo]

Okay so @pixiestickie and @weilaverdui caught me before I passed out for the night, so here's the first draft of the first half of YHMR chapter 15, in consolation for the ao3 outage!

As always I'm happy for any feedback, but I'm gonna fall asleep as soon as this posts so I won't hear anything for a few hours

(chapter under the cut)

"Do you think he hates me?"

"No." Jade replied without looking up from his counting. He could feel Floyd's frown.

"Oh c'mon you didn't even think about it! Are ya even listening to me?"

"Yes." Jade tried not to snap as he replaced the last stack of madol and closed the change box. "I am listening, and I did not need to think about it, because he clearly doesn't hate you."

"You don't know that!"

"Yes, I do."

"Oh yeah, how?? You don't even talk to him usually-"

"I do, actually." Jade said crisply. "I came across him in the halls the other day, and he joined me for lunch."

"WHAT?" Floyd nearly shrieked. Roughly the reaction Jade had hoped for.

"At the cafeteria, nothing intimate."

Floyd's tone darkened despite the reassurance. "Jade."

"Yes?" Jade asked brightly.

"What did you do."

"Just talked to him, as I said." Jade assured him again. "My point in bringing it up is that he asked after you, which he wouldn't have done if he didn't want anything to do with you."

Floyd blinked, wide eyed. "He- what? What'd he ask??"

"He wanted to know if you were alright. Something he wouldn't have to do if you weren't skipping classes and avoiding basketball practice for a week." Jade turned back to his work, sifting through paperwork to find the EOD reports. They hadn't been properly organized after the last closing shift, yet another side effect of having his business partners hopelessly preoccupied…

And of course, Floyd was too busy having another little conniption to be told anything about it.

"What- but- why's he goin' to you about it??" He demanded. "I was right there in front of him and he barely even talked to me!" Floyd huffed, then flopped himself over the bar with a frustrated sound, laying his head on his arm while rubbing at the base of his skull.

Jade sighed. His brother had come slinking out of hiding the moment they'd closed for the evening, determined to fret Jade's ear off about the same problem he refused to fix. Again. It had been the same pattern for nearly two weeks now and he was getting sick of reciting comforting platitudes.

"Did you give him a chance to talk to you, Floyd?" He asked impatiently as he put the papers down to face Floyd directly. "Or did you march him over here in a huff, snap at me for making you greet him, and then storm off to hide until he was gone?"

Floyd narrowed his eyes, then dropped his gaze, and muttered "Shit…"

He rolled to plant his face squarely into the bartop and slapped both hands over the back of his head. "I'm such an asshole." He moaned in muffled despair. "Now he definitely hates me!"

Jade rolled his eyes heavily, leaning to press a finger against his temple. "He doesn't hate you. He's confused by you, he's worried. You could see it on his face if you weren't so desperate to avoid looking at him." He looked to Floyd for any sign of a response, and watched him hunch down even further. Jade sighed again. "If anything, he likely thinks that you hate him after that little display."

"I don't hate him!" Floyd's head shot up to retort, then sunk back down in continued despair. "I just… Mmph…" His voice shrank down into something too easily muffled by his arms. Jade took a deep breath.

"Floyd." He tried again. "He doesn't understand your moods, he's not used to you like this. It's confusing. I can assure you that he doesn't hate you now, but you need to talk to him soon -and Azul, for that matter. If all three of you were on the same page this wouldn't be such an issue, everyone is worried."

"Stop lecturin' me like you know anything about it." Floyd grumbled.

"I think you drastically underestimate just how much I know about it." Jade admonished him, running low on patience. He returned irritably to his paperwork.

"Like what?" Floyd asked, sidling into his peripheral. He sounded a little more suspicious than whiny now, at least that was some improvement.

"Plenty." Jade said lightly. "I know he's anxious about your feelings, paranoid of our collective motives, vulnerable to acts of kindness… He doesn't socialize much, either, no acquaintances close enough to keep in contact with. As far as I could gather the three of us are the only people he texts conversationally. -That puts you in a rather privileged position for his attentions, don't you think?" He didn't wait for an answer, Floyd's silent tension was enough to prove he was listening. "I've found Jamil to be actually quite forthcoming, under the right circumstances…"

That got Floyd more sincerely riled up. "What circumstances?" The question had more of an edge to it than he typically directed at Jade. "How did you make him tell you that -did you hypnotize him?"

"Oh, relax. There was no need for my magic." Jade felt Floyd's stare boring into him, though he had no intention of looking up until he was finished with the tasks at hand. "I simply provided a listening ear, and read between the lines."

A hand came down on the papers Jade was working on, not violently, but blocking his ability to fill them out all the same. "Jade. What the fuck?" Floyd demanded. "He doesn't just talk about shit like that. What did you do to make-"

"Have you considered that might be because you don't give him the chance?" Jade snapped. "I didn't need to hypnotize him, I just gave him time to speak. He takes a while to think before revealing anything." True, the migraine probably helped lower his defenses a bit, but that wasn't helpful to share at the moment.

Floyd leaned over to frown at him.

"Whaddaya mean? I talk to him all the time -and he talks back. He just never talked to me about anything personal before, what gives? I thought he was afraid of you."

"Not as afraid as he used to be, unfortunately." Jade sighed. "The truth is, all I did was talk to him. You simply need to try a lighter touch. You overwhelm people-"

"Jamil doesn't -" Floyd began defensively.

"Jamil doesn't fear you." Jade cut in. "But he does get fussy when he feels cornered." He looked Floyd firmly in the eye. "I don't know what exactly happened between you two, but I know you were particularly rowdy right before your drop. Perhaps you could start by finding out if there's something that you should apologize for."

Floyd looked stumped for a moment, then dropped his gaze. "I gotta be honest, it's kinda fuzzy."

"It usually is." Jade agreed. "If the events don't come back to you soon, your best bet may be to just ask him directly."

"Yeahhh, yeah." Floyd rolled his eyes evasively. "I'll try that. I guess. I dunno- since when did you start paying so much attention to Seasnake anyway? I thought Azul had you on Otter duty."

He turned to frown suspiciously at Jade again. Just as territorial about his precious serpent as ever. It was a wonder that he still couldn't see the hypocrisy in criticizing Azul's obsession.

"Perhaps if you two weren't so lost in your own fantasies, you wouldn't be so shocked at the things that happen around you." Jade snapped. It was more acute than he'd intended, the anger behind it was as surprising to him as it was to Floyd.

"Jade…" Floyd asked, uncharacteristically hesitant in the face of Jade's uncharacteristic frustration. "What's up with you?"

"With me? I'm not the one who's been acting differently." Jade replied coldly.

Another frown, softer this time. "Are you upset about Jamil?"

Jade felt his jaw clenching as he spoke. "I'm upset about having to pick up more slack lately than I thought you two were collectively capable of. I'm upset because I've never seen Azul distracted to the point of letting his work slip, or you so concerned over someone else's feelings that it keeps you up at night." The words spilled out of him as unexpectedly as the emotion. Not inaccurate, but not anything he'd thought over until the moment they were spoken. "Your bickering used to be fun, lately it's just been tedious. Since when does any human have this much power over you two?"

Floyd took in the barrage quietly, contemplating something as he waited to be sure Jade was finished. "You're jealous." Was all he said in return.

The accusation struck unexpectedly, giving Jade pause. "Should I be?"

Floyd's expression crumpled with sympathy. Something rare on him, and usually unwelcomed by anyone he cared for enough to show it. Jade wasn't quite sure if it was unwelcome to him now, but his brother rallied with an attempt at his trademark rakish grin.

"Jealous of Seasnake, over Azul? Fuck no." He said cheerily, the most animated his tone had been since the tiff with Jamil. "You think either of us could get rid of him that easy? I mean, you think he's obsessive 'bout Seasnake, remember how he tracked us down back in the day? That greedy bastard's not gonna let you go again just cause he wants someone else too. He's a hoarder like that. C'mere."

Jade was caught off guard again, this time by a hug. His shoulders went stiff as Floyd pulled him in, only to relax into the comforting pressure.

"You know you got nothin' to worry about with Azul." Floyd continued without letting go. "And yeah, I like Seasnake too, but you know I'm not going anywhere. I just wanna get him to come around more. I think Azul's the same."

Jade chuckled softly, resting his forehead against Floyd's shoulder. "I see. So you two can still see eye to eye, provided you aren't in front of each other."

Floyd gave a halfhearted "tsh" and ruffled Jade's hair in retaliation. "It's not like I hate him all of a sudden, Azul just pisses me off sometimes is all. He just needs to get dragged back down to earth sometimes".

Jade bit at the offending hand. "Stop it. I'll come out looking like you."

"No- ouch- fine!" After another, harder bite Floyd relented to just draping an arm over his shoulders. "Aaanyway, I thought you two were gettin' along all of a sudden, and next minute you're all pissed off about him, what's the deal?"

Jade frowned. "Perhaps he's just been more interesting lately than your and Azul's constant fretting."

In truth, it was a little frustrating how interesting he was finding Jamil to be. It would have been simpler to expunge a boring distraction from the picture -or perhaps more frustrating still, to have Floyd and Azul so enamored with something less worthwhile. Regardless, the man was posing an unexpected conundrum, and was progressing towards making himself a long term feature. Jade had yet to decide where he stood on the situation, lately he'd just been beset with the impulse to prod at it like a beehive until something caved in.

Floyd's expression was doubtful enough that nothing more needed to be said, and he seemed willing to leave it at that. After a moment more of silence he gave Jade's shoulders another squeeze. "Sorry 'bout complaining to you so much."

"Just talk to Azul soon, or I'll do it for you."

The door to Azul's office slammed open before Floyd could say anything. Quiet but urgent footsteps swept down the hall towards them. Clearly Jamil's, but closer to stomping than they'd ever heard from him. Floyd perked up with a concerned look, just in time to see a dark shape turn the corner.

Jamil froze momentarily when he spotted them, the alarmed look of prey caught in the open, and then his eyes fell on Floyd. Hurt creased his brow, his lips parted to say something that never left his throat, and just like that he gave up. Jamil dropped his gaze to the floor, letting his hair hide his expression until he could force some composure, and finally looked up to offer a partial bow.

"Thank you for your hospitality." He told them curtly, managing for the moment to keep any emotion from his voice. He didn't wait for a response before hitting off, strides about as fast as they could get without running.

Floyd had frozen too, and Jamil was already out of sight by the time he thought to call out. It earned a hesitation, almost a pause, before the footsteps continued and his scent disappeared behind the sound of a door closing.

Well, that couldn't mean anything good.

They exchanged a look, then asked in unison, "Should we… -oh."

Azul's sharp footsteps were next to come down the hall, and the man himself looked almost as distraught as Jamil once he appeared. Jade waved a hand towards one of the barstools, pushing it outward for Azul to take a seat. The invitation was accepted with a shaky sigh.

"So, how did it go?" Jade asked politely.

"Did he storm out on you, too?" Floyd added.

Azul glanced up from massaging his forehead to frown at them. "Too…? When- nevermind. How did it go? I have no idea. He didn't storm out, he just …very suddenly and quietly decided it was time to leave, wouldn't say why." He waved a hand in frustrated surrender and dropped his face back into it. "He said he'll bring the proposition up to Kalim, and apparently has no say in the decisions after that."

He bit out the last part like it was bitter on his tongue, voice dripping with anger and posture oozing with defeat. Jade went about pouring a glass of brandy while Floyd tried talking to him.

"So, what? Is he mad at you, did he hate the deal, what happened? What'd you do?"

Azul glared miserably over his glasses.

"If I knew what I did I'd be out there fixing the issue, not sitting around with- thank you, Jade." He took the drink from Jade's hand and gave it a sniff. "With a glass of brandy and no clue what to do about it."

He placed the glass down hard on the table to drop his face back into his hands. "I have no idea what just happened." He continued in muffled dismay. "Everything seemed fine one moment, and then all of a sudden he's completely shut off and turning to go, not so much as a glance over his shoulder. Just, 'thanks for the drink', and bye."

Azul threw his hands up in frustration and took a large sip of his drink. He stared dismally at it after, sliding the glass in tiny circles to watch the liquid swirl. "I don't suppose either of you are in the mood for a riddle… I'm trying to figure out what exactly someone might be told every day since they were born."

"The fuck does that have to do with anything?" Floyd asked as he snatched the drink from Azul's fretting hands. He took a swig of his own and gave it back, earning little more than a tired frown. Evidence enough of Azul's emotional exhaustion. "Is he a sphinx now or something?"

That almost got a laugh, but Azul went right back to moping into his spinning drink. "I'd half believe it at this point."

"I think it's still pertinent to ask if this might affect the negotiations." Jade cut in. "You said he would take this to Kalim, do you trust that he won't sabotage it now?"

"I…" Azul squinted as he weighed the evidence in his mind. "I think he saw enough benefit in the alliance to want it for his own reasons. He's pragmatic enough for that."

"I certainly hope you're right." Jade replied, leaning to pour him more brandy. He expected Floyd to steal enough of it for the remainder not to do Azul much harm.

"You would think I'd know his patterns well enough to be sure by now." Azul grumbled, accepting the drink from Jade's hand only to surrender it, predictably, to Floyd's. "But he keeps his inner workings locked up tighter than a safe. Every snippet I get out of him just tells me I know even less than I thought…"

"What about a name?" Floyd asked suddenly as he slid the glass back across the bar.

Azul caught it on reflex, rolling it absently between his palms while he frowned inquiringly at Floyd. "A name?"

"Yeah." Floyd frowned back, miffed over not having been understood immediately the first time. "Y'know, the riddle? People hear their names every day."

Azul blinked once, twice, and then his eyes went wide. "Floyd, you may be right! I need to stop by the library."

He made a clumsy attempt to stand, only for Floyd to catch him by the shoulder and press him back into his seat. "No ya don't. It's the middle of the night and you smell like booze, go tomorrow."

Azul stared at him in bleary reproach until it became clear that the hand wasn't moving, then relented with a pout. "I don't see why that matters…"

"Trust me, they don't let you in like that." Floyd released Azul's shoulder to cross his arms stubbornly. "Besides, you left the EOD paperwork all over the place last night and Jade's been tryna track it all down for like twenty minutes. How's about you help him out. I'm gonna go make sure the kitchen's straight and then get some fucking sleep. 'Night."

With that, he turned to leave. Pausing just long enough to squeeze Jade's shoulder in farewell, and shoot him a meaningful look that flicked in Azul's direction.

Jade smiled to himself as his brother retreated, leaving him conveniently alone with Azul. Floyd always did have such a keen eye for details… Jade hadn't said a thing about the paperwork aloud, and here he'd thought Floyd was too busy fretting over Jamil to think of anything else.

Behind him Azul huffed, removing his glasses to wipe the lenses clean. "He seems more alive than he was this afternoon, what do you think?"

"Much more alive." Jade agreed. "He seems to be coming back, finally."

He took in the rare sight of unobstructed blue eyes, the way they were before coming on land. He couldn't help reaching for that lock of silvery hair, running it through his fingers and missing the way it would iridesce in the water. He really needed to coax Azul back into the water one of these days…

Azul squinted in an attempt to focus on him, glasses temporarily forgotten, and leaned into the touch. He coaxed Jade's fingers open to plant a kiss into his palm, then held it against his cheek with a contented sigh. "So long as I still have you, nothing is ever truly a failure, is it…"

Jade laughed softly, moving his thumb over Azul's face. "How much have you had to drink tonight?"

"Only enough to say what's always on my mind." He murmured, nuzzling deeper into the touch. "I was thinking about our families again tonight, about how grateful I am that I didn't manage to lose you."

The words loosened a knot in Jade's throat that he hadn't realized was there. He gripped Azul's face more firmly and pulled him in for a deep kiss, one that was finally met eagerly and without distraction. Gentle hands trailed up his neck as Azul kissed him back, holding him close and letting warm tears pool against his fingers.

"You and Floyd are my family." He insisted between kisses. "I wouldn't let you lose me."

"I love you." Azul whispered against his lips.

Jade hesitated, drew back, then pressed his forehead against Azul's, gripping tightly with fingers twined into the silver hair. "Do you still think about me when you don't need anyone to fall back on?" He whispered back. "When things are going well with Jamil, am I still on your mind?"

Azul drew back to look him in the eyes, however blurred that image might be, and frowned in concern. His hands gripped Jade's all the tighter. "Do you think you aren't a part of my triumphs, too? Part of my happiness? I think about you every move I make."

His sincerity was clear, chipping away at whatever tension had been building up in Jade over the weeks. Still not quite enough to shatter it. He gripped Azul's hands in return, the two small enough to fit neatly in Jade's fist. "Even now?" He asked. "Even when your latest venture leads you on such a frantic chase?"

Azul pulled him closer. Tiny hands and all, he dragged Jade easily across the bartop, pressing their foreheads together again. "Jade." He said more fiercely than he'd seemed capable of moments ago. "There is nowhere on this earth or below it that I would go without finding a way to keep you with me."

[estellamiraiauthor]

Blargh, this guy at work… I don’t think he’s a bad person but he gets under my skin sometimes.

I had already applied IN ADVANCE and had approved the following schedule for this week: Leave at 3 on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday off. It was on my calendar. In a group chat with our boss at 9pm on Friday, this guy sends me 27 pages of TINY font for translation and says he wants it by Wednesday at 3.

That’s… not possible. If I didn’t have unchangeable commitments on those days I could PROBABLY do a passable-for-an-internal-document job, but I couldn’t change my plans. He couldn’t change the deadline (SO WHYYYY WAIT UNTIL FRIDAY NIGHT TO ASK???) I’m still not sure if no one checked my calendar or if they actually thought it was possible to translate 27 pages between 9 am and 3 pm in addition to another job the same boss had given me.

I offered to work a few hours on Sunday, but because I ALSO had family commitments then, I couldn’t do a full day and take a substitute day off, but I said I’d do 3 or 4 hours just as overtime. The boss said no, just run it through machine translation and edit it. I said I also couldn’t EDIT 27 pages by Wednesday without working on the weekend or “late night” hours, and he said just do what I could. SIGH

So I did. I got a first pass on 20 of 27 pages, couldn’t even start the other 7. And with only one editing pass on a shitty machine translation… I think the correct meaning is communicated at this point, but not necessarily prettily, and I can’t guarantee no typos.

I also actually started at 6:30 and just punched in at 7:00 (the earliest when they don’t have to pay me “late night” overtime rates.

A translation company would’ve asked for 2-3 WEEKS to do this job. When I was an in-house translator and we had to do the financial reports we’d knock out something similar in 2-3 days BUT that was with 5-6 translators all taking individual slides and then passing them around to each other to cross-check. It wasn’t possible to give him what he wanted in the time I had available.

So what he got was… again, 20 pages probably communicate the correct meaning in a first-draft way. The other 7 are mostly gibberish.

I sent it back to him, and what did he do? He sent it off to someone in another division to finish the last 7 pages (fine) with a note that “Estella translated the first 20”.

OMFG WHAT THE FUCKING HELL DUDE??? You gave me a TINY FRACTION of the time any translation company or freelancer would’ve quoted you. I TOLD YOU it couldn’t be done in that time. YOU TOLD ME to just do what I could in the time allotted with machine translation… you do NOT get to put my name on a fucking SHODDY piece of work that is shoddy ENTIRELY BECAUSE you waited until 2.5 business days before the non-negotiable deadline to think to ask if I was available. 🤬🤬🤬🤬

(I replied to the email, removing the guy who made the unreasonable request from the CC, and clarified that I had NOT translated it but only done a super fast first-pass edit on a machine translation, and therefore feel free to make any necessary edits without worrying about whether there was a reason for any odd wording…trying to say “please do not think so little of me that this is actually my translation” without actually saying that.)

[rosescries]

Angel Wings

(Please remember this is a first draft, so keep that in mind while reading!)

Violet Davius had finally wore the school board down enough to let them have a Halloween dance their senior year, something that hasn't happened since the 1980s. And everyone's going to be there!

Including Rena Addams, a rather shy girl with a big crush on a certain head cheerleader. And unaware the feelings are mutual. Maybe they'll be able to get closer during the dance!

But they also find that maybe there was a reason the school hadn't had a Halloween dance in so long...

First / Last

~Chapter 3

October 31 9:32 pm: Halloween Night~

“Hey, doesn’t it seem like there’s more people than normal?” Rena asks, glancing around the gym. 

There’s definitely more teenagers than in their class stuffing themselves into the room. Maybe some of the lower grades decided to come as well? They look kind of odd to put it nicely, but they still look like they’re having a nice time.

“I guess,” Briar hums, taking a look around herself. “Are zombies coming back this year? A lot of people went for that look. Did really well too.” 

“Old school clothes too,” Rena adds, tilting her head. 

They’re all dressed in bright colors and teased hair. A lot of it is loose fitting and there’s quite a bit of denim in there as well. There’s also a lot of those creepy face masks and well fitted black, floor length dresses. 

“Huh. Weird. Well, I’m going to go get something to drink, you want anything?” Briar asks, jumping up from where the two were sitting for some rest after the music got kind of boring. 

“Sure,” Rena nods. Briar skips off and disappears into the crowd once again. Rena sighs and pulls the veil out of her face to join with the rest of it in the back. She looks out at all the people again, head tilting. 

“Come on, it’s now or never. Briar just left,” Abbey encourages, pulling Violet towards the table Rena’s sitting at. “And she’s looking really bored over there. Could use some company.” 

“Abbey!” Violet whines. Abbey just rolls her eyes, continuing to pull her friend along. Jack walks behind them, hands on Violet’s shoulders. 

“You can do this, Violet,” Jack assures, nodding his head. “And we’ll be there to help you along the way.” 

“Yeah,” Abbey agrees with a chuckle. “You’ll get her tonight.” 

Violet just groans in misery, glancing between her friend and her crush. At least until Abbey crashes into someone. 

“Oops! I’m sorry!” She squeaks, backing away from the person she just bumped into. 

“Don’t worry about it,” the boy says, turning back to his friend. 

The three pause, glancing at the stranger in front of them. He has a really convincing zombie costume, the rot on his skin looking almost real. There are also parts with really convincing looking bones visible. The karate uniform he wears is also weirdly convincing as well. 

There’s more kids like him milling about the gym, all in an array of costumes and talking to more unfamiliar faces. Some are even talking with familiar ones from their grade. But they all have the same convincing zombie makeup and messy clothes. All looking like they just walked out of the 80s. 

“Did.” Abbey pauses, glancing around again. “Was another school invited? A school of makeup artists or something.” 

“No,” Violet replies in confusion. “I’m not sure who they are.” 

“Strange,” Abbey mumbles. But then she shakes her head, smiling widely again as she continues pulling Violet over to Rena. “We can worry about that later! You have a girl to woo.” 

“Uh, looks like we’re a little late,” Jack comments, scratching the back of his neck. 

“What?” Abbey yells, spinning on her heels. 

They see one of the people they don’t recognize standing in front of Rena, who’s admittedly looking quite confused and weary. The stranger dressed as some kind of undead female rock star or something similar. With the tight black jeans and loose jacket. Along with several necklaces and very teased black hair. The girl seems rather excited, bouncing on her heels about something. Soon enough, she’s grabbing Rena’s hand and pulling her up and into the crowd. 

“Dang,” Abbey pouts, crossing her arms. “Lost our chance. Maybe we can find them and join in?”

“I don’t know,” Violet replies, glancing around again. Her face scrunches in worry and confusion as she looks around. “Something about this just seems… off to me.” 

Abbey and Jack look at her confused, but look around themselves as well. 

________

“Angi! I didn’t know you were coming!” 

Rena jumps when there’s suddenly someone in front of her. It’s a girl she doesn’t recognize, in an undead rocker costume. 

“I’m sorry?” Rena mumbles, leaning a little further back into the table. 

“Hey, no worries! But I thought you said you weren’t coming!” The rocker girl is bouncing on her heels. “But besides that! Brittney offered to let us hang out with her!” 

“Who?” Rena asks, even more confused. She’s not sure who this girl is or who Brittney is or why either of them are talking to her. She’s really wishing they wouldn’t though. 

“Come on, Brittney! You know the most popular girl in school! The head cheerleader!” The girl replies, looking like she can’t believe what she’s hearing right now. 

“What? But Violet’s-” Rena starts but is cut off by the girl grabbing her wrist and pulling her to her feet. 

“Come on! We won’t get a chance like this every day!” The girl chirps. She does look back and glance over Rena again though. “Gnarly costume by the way. Looks a little weird though.” 

“Wha- Gnarly?” Rena sputters. She helplessly gets dragged through the crowded gym to a less crowded area. Four other teens are standing around there. The only boy of the group has an arm around one of the girls, who has her arms crossed and is looking rather bored. The two other girls are on the other side of her, chatting happily.

Who Rena’s guessing is the leader, maybe that’s Brittney, is dressed like an undead angel. Some of the feathers from the small wings are missing and they look old and ratty. The white dress that goes to her knees is ripped and dirtied. Her hair’s a mess and the halo is crooked. Whatever makeup she was wearing is ruined, even looking like she’s cried at some point. 

The boy who has his arm around her has a white hockey mask over his face and is wearing a denim jacket, white shirt, and jeans. He’s also holding a gimmicky fake knife, twirling it idly in his hand. The girl closest to the angel girl is wearing a tight black dress with sleek black hair, though both are still rumpled and ragged. She also has some bold makeup on. The last girl is wearing an aggressively 80s popstar outfit with makeup and hair to match. They also added the undead part of it too. 

They glance over boredly as the two of them approach. Though the angel does a double take and stares at Rena, straightening her posture. 

“Hey! Look who I found!” The rocker girl chirps. 

“Great,” popstar sneers. 

“Angi,” the angel says, a bit breathlessly and glancing over Rena’s appearance. 

“Um, I’m not-” Rena tries to say. 

“I didn’t know you were coming!” Angel continues, leaning forward and taking Rena’s hands herself. “I’m glad you made it!” 

“Thanks?” Rena squeaks, still very confused. 

“Nice to see you, Angi,” black dress greets, smiling pleasantly. “Thanks for bringing her over, Jamie. You both have nice costumes.” 

“Thanks!” Rocker girl, Jamie apparently, beams. “You also have rocking costumes.” 

“Thanks,” the boy snorts, now leaning against the wall. His voice is kind of muffled by the mask. And now that she’s closer, Rena can see just how big the boy is. Intimidatingly so. 

The angel hasn’t let go of her hands or taken her eyes off Rena yet either. 

“Thanks for inviting us over!” Jamie smiles. “You look beautiful, Brittney.” 

“Thanks,” angel, Brittney, smirks. “You look gorgeous, Angi.” 

“Thanks, but I’m not-” Rena tries again, only to be talked over again. 

“You two can hang out with us tonight,” black dress says, flipping some of the dark hair over her shoulder. “Maybe you can sit with us at lunch too on Monday, if you’d like.” 

“That would be totally awesome,” Jamie nods. Popstar snorts, crossing her arms as she eyes Jamie. 

Rena doesn’t get the chance to correct the group for a while. Brittney pulled her closer though, draping an arm over her shoulder. Jamie jabbered on a lot about school and teachers Rena doesn’t know. Most of the group looks rather bored, at least until popstar, or Danielle as Rena learned, asked her to go get them some punch. 

“Sure!” Jamie chirps, instantly running off. 

“Why are we allowing that nerd around us again?” Danielle asks, twirling a piece of her hair. 

“Danielle, shut up,” black dress, or Nicole, replies. 

“Whatever, I’m gonna go to the bathroom,” Danielle mutters, walking off into the crowd. 

“I’m gonna head to the bathroom too,” the boy, Nick, shrugs. He walks off, following after Danielle. 

“Oh, Brittney, your makeup is running,” Nicole comments. She smiles widely, a fake tear in her cheek making it unsettling. “Maybe Angi can help you fix it.” 

“Oh, great idea!” Brittney smiles back. She then turns to Rena again. “You’re really good at makeup, think you can help?” 

She’s already walking before Rena can respond. Despite Rena’s sputtering protests, Brittney pulls her out of the gym and into a classroom, not the bathroom. 

“It’s much quieter in here,” Brittney comments, flicking on a light switch. “I can actually hear myself think.” 

“Uh, yeah,” Rena agrees hesitantly. “But, uhm, I’m not Angi.” 

“Really?” Brittney asks, seating herself on a desk. She looks amused. “Then who are you?” 

“I’m Rena Addams.” Rena introduces. “I’m here with my friend, Briar. She’s probably looking for me now.” 

Brittney’s smile falters for a minute, a dark look passing her features. But a second later she’s back to looking pleasant. 

“Brittney Heinz. Don’t worry about it,” Brittney smiles. She tilts her head back a bit, a pout on her face. “But don’t you think you could stay even for a little bit?”

“Uhm, I don’t- I don’t know,” Rena mumbles, clasping her hands together. Her eyes dart towards the door. 

“Come on. You’re the most interesting thing that’s come around in a while,” Brittney encourages. Rena glances away again, a little bit of a blush coating her cheeks. Brittney shifts, crossing her legs and leaning back a bit. “I want to know where you got that dress from.” 

Brittney’s eyes rove over Rena’s figure slowly, drinking in every detail. 

“You look gorgeous in it,” Brittney adds, making Rena’s blush darken. “Leagues above anyone else in that gym. Maybe the world too.” 

“I-I don’t think you could go that far,” Rena mumbles, flickering her eyes towards Brittney. But she quickly looks away again. 

“No way. I mean every word,” Brittney assures. She chuckles when Rena covers her red face, eyes roving over her form. “Where did you get that dress though?” 

“My friend’s mom made it for me. She just altered an old wedding dress from a thrift store,” Rena replies, uncovering her face to pick at the material. 

“It looks great. Did you do your makeup yourself?” Brittney asks, reaching out and brushing her thumb over one of the fake tears in her skin. She frowns as Rena flinches away from her touch, eyes narrowing a little as her head tilts. 

“No. My friend did all the makeup,” Rena replies, leaning a little farther back on the desk. Brittney just hums. “Uhm… Did you do your makeup? You and your friends make for some really convincing zombies.” 

Brittney laughs at that, glancing towards her own rotting skin and disheveled clothing. She returns her eyes to the girl in front of her after a few seconds. 

“We do, don’t we?”