#no thats a lie i did have a chance i just chose not to read it

[justdriftaway-madd]

I feel empty.

I have been healing from MaDD for the last 2 years, and working very hard towards recovery. Prior to this i spent more than half my day every day dissociated and daydreaming. It destroyed my life. I had to put in great effort to heal to the point where i can go almost all day without daydreaming at all, and it is almost to the point of not being maladaptive anymore (though i still consider it MaDD because imo it never goes away fully, that urge to use daydreams as a coping mechanism never goes away and there is always the chance that i will go back to my old ways if i experience that trauma again).

But with all of that came losing my paracosm. The one i built for years. The one that was more like home than anywhere in the outside world. I felt more alive there than anywhere else, it felt real. The family my parame had was more like family than my outside one. But i had to leave that all behind in hopes to heal my brain and experience the true world outside.

The way i did this was lots of therapy and then one last daydream where the world/paracosm exploded. They all died. I replaced that urge to daydream with podcasts, reading, and loud music to stop me daydreaming, and eventually, i healed to where i am now. I can chose when and where to daydream and do it in a safe manner, but i cant ever go back to that paracosm.

Its always there, in the back of my mind though. Its like an addiction. I cant use again but i know the drug is out there and i could have it if i want to. I still crave it. But i must keep myself safe.

Only difference is i cant go back. Ive tried. Ive tried crawling back to that same paracosm but it feels like a lie. Because the real one ended. Its all fake now. Just another regular ol daydream. Not home like it used to be. It doesnt help that the paracosm was based on a harmful/problematic media either. I feel so guilty going back to it, and i dont even like the media anymore and i dont want to risk entering fandom again because of daydreams.

My paracosm died. All the paras with it. No matter what i do i cant get them back. And while thats probably for the best, i cant help this feeling of emptiness all the time.

The longing.

The urge to run back into the arms of my paras.

I miss them so much and i cant get them back nor can i replace them.

I try to build new paracosms but i just cant. Nothing will ever be the same. I miss it.

[sketzi]

okay top 3 scythe characters GO

ohh this is hard. i reread the first book over the weekend and omg...

faraday has become a new favourite. i understand him much better now than i did before. alot of people mistake faraday keeping himself alive as bad writing that contradicted his personality, but i really think this revealed something. faraday acted out of a sort of selfishness that we hadnt seen in him yet. he was shown to us in the beginning as the humble, infallible mentor, and especially someone who morally stood above the majority of the scythedom as an EXAMPLE. a model faraday action would be to actually glean himself. but instead he chose to allow himself a life of comfort, which is, in all the ways you look at it, selfish! AND AND I JUST FEEL LIKE HE FELT A WEIGHT DROP OFF HIS SHOULDERS!! then (if i remember it right lmao) neal just follows that up with him isolating himself and being a pussy throughout an entire book, LIKE HES SO IMPERFECT. faradays the type of guy who holds onto his beliefs, but when he gets the chance to act on them he'll dip 😭😭 thats why i love him. also he'd have a big white beard like santa

hard pick between curie and greyson here. i cant put why i love greyson into even 1000 pages so ill talk about curie. she is an angel (neal saw an angel in his dreams and she asked him "can i be in your ya trilogy?"). gosh i just love how he describes her. she is slender, but shockingly so, like an uncomfortably long skeleton. and the way she looks only tells us how she is both out of place in the scythedom and humanity. i loved her befoe, but reading gleanings is when she finally clicked for me. curie literally can not be between the lines!!! every part of her is shocking: the way she gleans, the way she makes no compromise, the POWER she holds over the scythedom. and when susan really shines is when you compare her to faraday. shes someone who reaps the rewards of being a scythe, not because she thinks she deserves it, but because she doesnt lie to herself that she doesnt want it. one of our first impressions of curie being her having luxury meals BECAUSE THEYRE THERE. her honesty makes susan the most terrifying, yet the most understandable scythe in the series imo. she is so complete. i never even mourned her death because it was such a fitting end. I was just satisfied tbh. honestly, if she didn't die on the endura, she'd have gleaned herself by the end of the toll. (faraday needs to get a grip LMAO (this post was made by the mortality gang))

so my fav of all time HAS to be the thunderhead. everything about it is just so UGHHH SO GOOD. neal completely defied all my expectations coming into it. i genuinely thought the thunderhead would just be a convenient plot tool, like an even more invasive google, BUT THE FACT THAT IT CAN BE PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE? FEEL PRIDE, FEEL THAT IN ORDER TO KEEP UP ITS INABILITY TO FAIL IT MUST DENY ITSELF PLEASURE(its infallibility is a complete lie btw and i want to post about that). if you told me when i was 13 that i would want to make a glorified spanner feel bad for its actions then id laugh. its such a good parallel to the scythedom. both hold responsibility for humanity and how they wield it, both have to fight pleasure, one human and one not. yet the thunderheads responsibility is what turns it human until i could not tell the difference between the two. CAN YOU TELL I LOVE IT?? (ugghh also i believe that neals own opinion on the thunderhead changed throughout the series but I NEED TO POST I PROMISE)

sorry if this was too long! these are my favs :)))

[worldwright]

Good evening ! I was swooshed into re-reading some chapters of the Ijichi fic i keep talking about -it got updated and it pushed me to re-read some other chapters after the latest one

I don't know if you know that guy, but I've known him for at least a year and a half because we were in a book club together and he convinced me to listen to TMA and now i really, but really want to hug them to death because of that

I've never really told anyone (before today) about my favorite sportive activity -not that into it for me to be a sport, but enough for me to love it. not that i can still do it (i hope if we can find something to alleviate a bit my pain, i'm going back to it asap). but, yeah, i roller-skated, but like to a point

I did it for, like, 9 years (not that i'm great at it). and then had to stop it last year in December, when it became clear that i won't be able to do it again (realized that with ice-skating), and, well, i talked about that with my therapist today, bc i surprisingly enough never once referenced that one huge part of my life

and it makes me so sad, so fucking sad. like no one i know knew about that before today, my family didn't really like roller-skating (they always preferred bicycles over rollers), so i don't really have someone who can understand how big it is for me to not be able yo be back in my rollers (i'm an inline skates guy btw)

it just feels right to skate and since falling is a big part of it, well, i had to abandon to do it

i'm not angry about it, just, just terribly sad

anyway. it's just. i don't like talking about skating or anything related to it, so that's why no one knows about that. i don't like high speed, i like skating on flat surfaces and that's all. so i never joined a group or smth like that

and omg today's ask is fucking long, but

i never share about this. never. i don't feel lonely skating, but i'm just alone, no one to talk about it, no that i want this now since my knees' state, but past me would have loved that. i don't want to mourn this hobby even if there's little chance for me to ever get back to it, so i chose not to talk about this for so fucking long

i would have loved to know some skaters or people who do tricks on bicycles when i could still do it, maybe i wouldn't feel like this now if i had people who understood me

anyway

have a wonderful morning my friend

oh god that's really sad, i'm really sorry you're going through that :(((((( it's a thing you get to mourn, for sure <3 sending all the hugs i can

i uh, forgot to eat until now 😅😅 got distracted packing for my trip and stuff

END OF MAGNUS !!! congratulations and i'm sorry for your loss LMAO

my computer is STILL repairing :)))))))))))))))) after more than 48 hours :)))))))))))))))))))))))))) at least i'll be able to abandon it for another 48 without wanting to use it

thats a lie i want to use it right now

whatever

train ride tonight!! it'll be dark before i even leave home, but at least that gives me the opportunity to listen to spooky podcasts hehe

hope your fics are comforting and familiar, and i hope you have a lovely evening, friend!!

[chihirolovebot]

[ also speaking of my fangan and sleep awake ]

holds you by the shoulders. people have probably said this before and i will say it again: your kokichi is like. my favorite, truthfully, and the perfect basis to get to know his character and how to write him. genuinely many thanks

a lot of people either like. dumb him down? to "i lie because i can't trust anyone.... the angst I hide inside is too much for you to handle....." or completely erase that aspect of his character. which yk, different characterizations are always cool, but it's super interesting to read your kokichi in sleep awake because i can definitely see the way you write him being in the canon game. like word for word, bar for bar, he'd definitely fit right into canon

i can't wait for the next chapter <3 your ouma my beloved always

YEAHHHH yeah. okay. okay ive spoken a lot abt this but i will never miss an opportunity to say it again.

kokichi is interesting BECAUSE of his moral greyness. that's it. i mean obviously there's more but the core of his character is that he is not right all the time. he's a lot less sympathetic than antagonists like nagito or the warriors of hope, who did bad things but you could at least understand where they were coming from. i think the key to writing kokichi (and this i s obviously my own personal opinion im not the patron saint of characterising kokichi) i think u rly have to strike a balance between the good and bad he does, and weave his flawed philosophy into everything he does and says. like. the way he thinks is founded in truth but he takes to too much of an extreme which leads to him distrusting everyone, which leads to him manipulating gonta into killing miu. the truth is that he didnt HAVE to do that, he knew miu was planning to kill him ahead of time and he had multiple chances to stop it before it started. he just chose not to out of distrust for his classmates.

and thats GOOD. that was makes him a great fucking character. and people take this as either 'wow kokichi's fucking evil' or 'wow kokichi's fucking sad and heroic he was just tryign to save everyone.' and like. yeah of course he was trying to save everyone but the way he did it is objectively bad and wrong. that's the point of the main theme of the game imo.

this got long. what im trying to say is that i hate when people characterise kokichi as either end of the extreme. he's not evil and he's not particularly good. but he is definitely understandable and definitely redeemable in my opinion. that's what makes it so fascinating to write a story abt him!!

thank u very much by the way!!! i put a lot of thought into kokichi and think rly hard abt the things i have him say and do. sometimes i've wanted something to happen but ultimately i've had to rewrite because it's not feasible to his canon character. and i do worry abt my characterisation of him sometimes so hearing this is rly lovely and makes me a lot more confident. thank u very much!!! and i hope ur having a lovely day <333

[megan-is-mia]

hey hi i really like'd yan fem brugio so was wondering if you wan't do also yan fem fugonara with smothering prompts 5,20,17, and one v2 prompts 240 pretty please

(this has been a long time coming sorry)

(Yandere! Fem! Poly! FugoNara x Male! S/o) 

5. “Please don’t do anything to upset me. The mess wouldn’t be good for either of us.”

17. “I don’t want to do this, but I’m not afraid to.”

20. “I spent so much time making sure everything was perfect… you’re not allowed to ruin it.”

240. “Please tell me again. Tell me how much you love me even if it’s a lie.”

You cant outrun the mob, that was just common sense. (Y/n) understood that, really he did. The only thing you could really do is make sure to pay the protection fees on time, keep your nose out of the familia’s business, and if you did happen to stumble upon them mid-shakedown turn a blind eye to it. If you could do that then the chances were good the mob wouldnt feel the need to single you out for punishment. This was the rules the young man lived by and up until now they’d served him well.

However his rules had not prepared him for this situation. He’d been sitting on the tram, riding home after a long day of working as a waiter when his current predicament had commenced. (Y/n)had been staring out the window when someone abruptly plopped down in the seat next to him. He’d been about to turn and utter an obligative greeting to his seatmate when he caught sight of the reflection in the glass.

Snow white hair and ruby red eyes stared back at him from the glass. The owner of these exotic features was a young woman who’s mouth quirked up into a small grin upon seeing (Y/n)'s face go from blank to startled upon comprehending her image in the window’s pane. Slowly, cautiously even, he turned to look at the young woman and confirm her identity. This was not the first time he’d seen her, she was a frequent patron at the restaurant he worked day in and out at.

They had never spoken really, just the bare minimum necessarily to complete the business transaction between a server and the person they were providing service to. He’d heard her name, Pannacotta Fugo it was, spoke by the other people she regularly dined with. (Y/n) had personally always thought it was a little odd for a person to be named after a dessert but he didn’t put to much more thought than that into it.

It wasnt his business to judge what other people’s parents called them. Much less was it his business to question why a mafiasto would chose to go by a name like that. Yes, he knew she was part of the mob and so were the rest of the odd bunch she spent meals with. He knew if they werent mobsters that the restaurant’s owner wouldnt have tolerated all the racket and property damage they caused on the regular. (Y/n) himself had been forced to break up more than one fight that the rowdy group began over their dinner.

However all that knowledge didnt help him right now. Why was Fugo sitting next to him on the tram and why had she smiled like that at him? Those were the questions that weighed on his mind in the moment. He jumped to attention as fingers were snapped beneath his nose and he saw that the small smile had been replaced by an equally small frown on the young woman’s face.

“Huh? Were you saying something?” (Y/n) stammered out as his heart began to race.

“No, not yet” Fugo said shaking her head. “She isnt here yet and anything I tell you I’ll have to catch her up on. So it’s better to wait, I just wanted to make sure I have your attention (Y/n)” she added, sending a chill down his spine that she knew his name. Logically he understood that she probably knew it from reading off the name tag he wore while he worked but it still made him feel uneasy to hear her say it.

“Hey Fugo did you find h-” a new female voice spoke before stopping mid-sentence as its owner stopped in her tracks in the aisle next to Fugo and (Y/n). “Heh, guess thats a yes to that question” the newcomer said cheerifully sitting down in the seat across from the young man. He recongized her as well, her dark hair and unique purple eyes making her hard to forget or mistake for another soul. This girl was Narancia Ghirga and she was a member of the same group of gangster Fugo belonged to.

“Hi cutie~” Narancia said leaning forward in her seat to plant a peck on (Y/n). The boy, not expecting such an action, was stiff as a board even as his cheeks flushed with color with heat radiating from the spot where the kiss had been placed.

“Nara” Fugo said in a warning type of tone even as her compatriot giggled and seemed unaware of her displeasure.

“Sorry, but he’s just so damn cute I couldnt help myself” Narancia said with a shrug. “I promise I’ll wait until we get home before I give him anymore smooches” she added when Fugo didnt react to her initial statement.

“Home?!” (Y/n) said baffled, feeling as if he’d missed a crucial part of the conversation. Which in a matter of speaking he sort of had. While he blinked and stared at the two young woman with his mouth gaping like a fish they were both going over the events that had lead up to this moment. 

The two girls had been fostering feelings for the waiter for many months now. When they both realized that they longed for the same man they fought. If not for Bruno intervening on numerous occasions, alot of blood would have been spilled as they worked through their differences. Eventually they came to an agreement, that they would share their beau between the two of them. With this resolution in place they began to plan, other rather Fugo planned and Narancia helped carry out the actions necessarily to complete their plan.

At its core the plan was to steal (Y/n) away to be their stay at home boytoy. However to make such a thing happen they needed to play their cards right. They’d painstakeningly waited until all the conditions were right and the day, today, finally came. The culmination of their hard work was within reach, they just had to cross the finish line and it would be smooth sailing from there on.

“Yes, we’re taking you home with us” Fugo said firmly wrapping her arms around one of (Y/n)'s arms and resting her head on his shoulder. Even as the words were leaving her mouth she could feel the boy’s muscles tensing up under her hold. “Please don’t do anything to upset me” she urged with a gentle squeeze. “The mess wouldn’t be good for either of us” she added after a moment when the young man’s body did not relax.

“Yeah you should listen to her, when Fugo gets agitated people tend to get hurt and/or die” Narancia chimed in leaning forward again and placing her hands on (Y/n)'s lap and gripping his thighs. “Plus I can get pretty nasty to if you push me baby. If you kick up a fuss then maybe i’ll just have silence the rest of this tram, permanently” she went on with a dead serious tone in her voice. “I don’t want to do this first date of ours like this, but I’m not afraid to” she concluded after a moment.

After a few more tense moments, (Y/n) let out a long breath he’d been holding in and relaxed under the two young women’s grips. They in turn let out their own sighs, relieved that they wouldnt have to spill blood and explain to Bucciariti what had happened. The three of them rode on a few more stops before reaching their stop and getting up to leave the tram. The young man let himself be led along, almost seeming to be in a trance. His mind had temporarily shut down from the stress he was experiencing and didnt seem to be in a hurry to return.

His senses only chose to return once he was totally naked and bound to a bed. His body flailed violently, almost but not successfully forcing Fugo’s fingers out of his ass and Narancia’s mouth off his cock. The albino struck his thighs with her free hand and continued to scissor his insides with purpose.

“H-h-hey” he began before a hand was slapped over his mouth. ““I spent so much time making sure everything was perfect… you’re not allowed to ruin it” Fugo said keeping her hand over his mouth as she began to finger fuck him in ernst. Narancia would have given her two cents if it wasnt for the dick in her mouth that she was busy coating in a healthy layer of salvia. About the same time that she deemed her work satisfactory and the the young man’s dick ready to go inside her, Fugo pulled her fingers out of the boy’s ass and fumbled with her strap-on before lining it up with the stretched hole in front of her.

Almost as if they were able to read each other’s minds, the two girls thrust into and dropped onto the captive boy between them. They were both still as statues for a long moment even as their mutual lover thrashed about feeling totally overwhelmed by their affections. Narancia was the first to move again, rolling her hips and encouraging (Y/n)'s cock to rub against her sweet spot. Soon after Fugo begam taking action, rocking her hips forwards and back to abuse (Y/n)’s prostate.

As they found their rhythm and were able pleasure both themselves as well as (Y/n) the declarations of love began to pour out. The two girls groped and kissed at their shared victim with increasing affection that it wasnt long before the boy said something he shouldnt have.

“Oh fuck! Fuck I love you!” (Y/n) cried out, half mad with pleasure. These words brought both young women’s bodies to a sudden stop as they processed his proclamation.

“Please tell me again. Tell me how much you love me even if it’s a lie” Narancia finally said in a soft voice. However her request was not answered as (Y/n)'s mind was now to far gone to speak intelligible words. His orgasm was soon to come and he spilled inside the dark-haired girl prompting her to cum as well. A few breaths later Fugo too had found her finish and was puling out of the young man’s body so she could clean and set aside her strap.

Narancia was slower in retreating from (Y/n)'s form, her legs too weak at first to lift her up and off his member. Once free of his body she flopped down beside him and snuggled her face into the crook of his neck. It was left to Fugo to grab a towel or two for them to use so they could go to sleep without dried cum everywhere. With the task of cleaning up complete the albino made herself comfortable on the young man’s other side.

With the returning of his mind after such intense pleasure came great regret and dismay for (Y/n). What the fuck was he going to do now? He couldnt stay here and be these mafia girls’ plaything! Although… what other choice did he have? It wasnt like there was someone at home waiting for him, and if he didnt show up to work then he’d just be replaced by someone else. His insides turned cold as he came to this conclusion and he shivered which only prompted his captors to snuggle closer. He really, and truly was stuck in this situation.

All he could do was try and put a brave face in order to make the best of his current circumstances. With this in mind he turned his head from one side and then the other, planning a kiss on each girl’s head which was answered by gasps of delighted surprise and the two young women lifting their heads to give him kisses of their own. Satisfied with the reaction to his bold move, he shut his eyes and began drifting off to sleep…    

THE END

[illfoandillfie]

Promise

Pairing: Aromantic!Fem!Reader x Ben Hardy

Warnings: Implied smut and some Feelings talk but honestly it’s pretty tame.

Words: 1,413

A/N: It’s Aggressively Arospec Week! So, as promised, I’m going to be posting a few blurbs/short one shots and things during the coming week to celebrate, all of them taking place within my Platonically verse. All of the posts will be tagged as “platonically event” in case you want to find them later (or block the tag)

This first one is inspired by a song - Promise by The Novel Ideas. I think it was probably written with a more romantic relationship in mind but theres a few lyrics in there that I choose to interpret as queerplatonic, and that especially reminded me of Ben and Reader in Platonically.

Ben’s house was a comforting place. You’d always felt comfortable there, since you’d first become friends with Ben, but especially after you got together. It was bigger than your place for one, an actual house and not a rundown flat you had to share to afford, though it was still fairly small. Its yard was almost non-existent but there was a scrap out the back that caught the sun in the afternoons. More than once you and however many friends had huddled there on wintery afternoons to warm up or else sprawled out in as few layers as you could get away with hoping the mercury wouldn’t rise much higher. So, after a day mostly spent indoors, huddled at your computers, you and Ben decided it might be nice to take a picnic rug out into the sunshine to relax before you had to worry about dinner. Of course, when Ben suggested the idea he chose to use the phrase, “boost our vitamin D levels” and you thought he was insinuating something else entirely.   “Well if that’s really what you want,” he laughed, pretending to reach for the waistband of his joggers.

Instead you stuck to his original idea, grabbing a fuzzy orange blanket from his wardrobe and laying it out over the patchy grass, throwing a couple of pillows down on top so your heads at least would be comfortable. For a while you just sort of did your own things near each other. Ben was preparing for a new movie so took the opportunity to read over the information he had and sections of the script, occasionally muttering to himself or highlighting something important (nearly always almost dropping his phone onto his face). And you happily stretched out beside him, relishing the warmth of the sun as you played games on your phone and scrolled through Tumblr. But, the lower in the sky the sun got, the closer together you moved until the sky was tinted with pink and you were laying perpendicular to each other, your head resting on his stomach. With a sigh, Ben set aside his phone and looked up at the wispy clouds moving across the sky. You knew what he was thinking about though he stayed quiet. “How long before you go?” “We start shooting in two weeks but I fly out a little before that just so I can get settled and meet everyone and there’s time to do any prep stuff before filming actually begins.” He paused but realised he hadn’t really answered you, “twelve days,” “Thats ages away,” you said with a soft laugh though you both knew the time would go by quickly. It wouldn’t be the first time you waved Ben off at the airport, but it would be the first time since you’d decided to be queerplatonic partners. Something about it made you a little sad, knowing you wouldn’t have your best friend by your side for the few months it took to film the movie, but it wasn’t the end of the world and you were excited on his behalf too.   Ben sighed again, less audibly than before but you could feel it in the way his stomach and chest moved so you rolled over to face him, propping yourself up on your elbow, studying the pensive expression he wore and determining he needed cheering up.   “I expect you to bring me back a present,” He smiled, his eyes drifting from the sky down to you as he let his head turn to the side, “I’ll keep that in mind,” “And I don’t mean something crappy like sweets or whatever junk you usually bring me. That was fine before but there has to be some sort of perk since I’m your partner now. I mean, everyone thinks I’m your girlfriend so you really have no choice here, you have to bring me something good.” The smile slowly spread until Ben was laughing, “Okay, something good it is then.” You giggled along with him, ignoring the patch of hard dirt under your elbow until you couldn’t any longer and instead rolled onto your back so you could lie beside him and let him wrap you up in his arms. And for a little while that was enough. It was close to being too warm, hot as you were from laying in the sun, but you didn’t mind, content in the knowledge that Ben was happy too.

Slowly his grip loosened until it was just his palm rubbing gently over your stomach and side, his thoughts back where they’d been before, “If I’d known I wouldn’t have auditioned for the movie,” “What?” “If I’d known things between us would work. At the time I kinda figured it was a good excuse in case asking you out ruined shit. I could just lay low for a few weeks and then dip, give you some space. But now it kinda feels like a mistake.” “Are you kidding? It’s a great roll, Ben, and you’re going to be amazing in it.” “Yeah I know, and I am excited about it,” “I’d hope so since it means you get to go to Greece,” He gave another soft chuckle at that, “Yeah that’s definitely part of my excitement. And it will be fun. But things are really good with you. Like really good. And I don’t want to ruin that by leaving.” You understood where he was coming from but still felt he was being a bit ridiculous, “You better not be getting romantically sentimental on me. It’s not like we live in the Regency period and have to rely on letters in the post or whatever. And besides, we’re not romantically involved so it’s a bit stupid for you to get all depressed about going.” You gave him a poke in the ribs for good measure.   “I promise I’m not,” there was an audible lift in his voice, “I just feel very protective of you. I don’t want you to be sad.” “Uhhhh, I’m going to be house sitting for you so there’s no chance of me being sad. I’ll have this place to myself and I am definitely going to enjoy it. Playing music as loud as I want, eating my way through your stash of chocolate, playing all your video games whenever I want. Able to be loud when I masturbate. No need to worry about accidentally waking up a roommate or walking in on her giving her boyfriend a bj. Fucking paradise really.” Ben snorted at the last bit and squeezed you tight again before kissing your temple, “Okay, sad isn’t a problem then. But I also don’t want you to realise I’m not necessary.” It was your turn to snort though it was less about amusement and more about how daft Ben sounded, “But you aren’t necessary.” “Way to make a guy feel special Y/N,” “No it’s a good thing. Like, being aro, I know I don’t need a relationship of any kind and, honestly, I’d be happy being single. I was happy being single for a long time. I have no desire for a relationship. But I want to be with you anyway. It doesn’t matter that I don’t feel a particular way for you. I just like you so much and think you’re such a good friend and we have so much fun that I’m happy with you. And I don’t want to stop being with you. You being in Greece isn’t going to change that.” “Guess I never thought of it like that. Kinda sweet actually.” “Plus, y’know, we’re pretty great at sex, right?” “Oh definitely great at it.”

It was much darker by then, the sun hanging low in the sky, but you barely noticed as Ben’s lips met yours, soft and comforting at first though neither of you seemed to want to be the one to stop the kiss. So neither of you did stop it. Instead you both shifted around to make it easier, eventually settling with his knee between your legs, giving you something to rock against as his arms loosened and his hands slid down to cup your arse. You knew you would miss him while he was away. He was your best friend so of course you would. But you weren’t worried. And you hoped you could at least distract Ben from whatever worries he had about it, if not cure them entirely.   “It’s getting dark Benny, you wanna move this inside? Think I’m a little low on Vitamin D.”

[fandom-blackhole]

I'm back from my mandatory two day socialization recovery period required for all socialization even if I enjoy it. It's time for some Mermaid!Din au thoughts (No thots unfortunately but we'll live)

First off I love the isolation that the reader faces because of the lighthouse they live in. And I love how the townspeople being nice to the reader help give them a reason to stick around when weird things start happening.

I love how it took months before anything strange starts happening, like were Din and Grogu just not around or were they observing the reader. Did Din ever try to stop Grogu from damaging the lighthouse or did he let the little rascal do as he pleased.

· And gosh I love the idea of reader dressing in old worn clothing, a knit sweater with fraying sleeves, sweat pants covered in paint from repairs, an old windbreaker to help keep the cold out. It makes me heart all warm and fuzzy.

Edna, who i've head cannoned as this series Miss Chatham (H2O: just add water charter) is honestly life goals. Like live near ocean - check(ish), have rare knowledge that can be used to help new person - check, being just slightly spooky -amazing. And is that a little matchmaker I see her playing? I love it.

Then Grogu being injured :( I bet that Din is absolutely being eaten alive by guilt even though we all know it’s not his fault and he does literally anything he can to keep Grogu safe and happy.

And In love how Din is venerable enough to ask for help, like he recognizes that this is something out of his area of expertise so he goes to the person he knows is “safe” to get help. He’s humble enough to admit that he needs help and is not capable of doing everything for Grogu. And being able to admit that is an important life skill that not enough people have.

· But even after he ask the reader for help he is still hesitant which shows that even though hes trusting reader he will still kick (is it still a kick if its with a tail) the readers ass if he hurts him.

“But you can help him” Oh my heart the trust in that sentence. Like Din just heard, “so yeah I can help your son but I have to take him somewhere it will be hard for you to follow. And he needs to stay there for at least a week, and even if you manage to come its going to be so far from your natural element.” But he was still on board with the plan. And then he goes to climb on the rock so he can drag himself all the way to the light house because he can’t let his little boy go alone even if it means hurting himself to do it.

Reader was smart af for doing the old blanket slipperaroo trick

Reader immediately knowing something was up when she walked into town is so realistic. She literally is hiding a massive secret at her lighthouse of course anyone would be on edge walking back into society. Especially a society that already knows a little something about the secret. But them to amplify it. Miss Chatham to the rescue. She knows that reader is up to something and she uses her powers as an old lady with lungs and karen potential to scare off the problem for a little bit. The reader just placed so much trust on Edna by straight up telling her that she's housing Din and Grogu.

· Also that fool browsing the menstrual hygiene rack, like dumbass. Is this your way of making him miss every shot? Because we know that storm troopers are well known for their ability to miss every shot so making him automatically turn to tampons? Genius

Cashier for the win, like beep beep bitch now pay up

The "cyare" omg and then the reader warning Din about the cookies and him being so curious about them. The way Din is so perceptive of the readers mood that he is already able to tell that something is wrong. It was such a smart idea to have the reader lead with asking him to give her a small chance to calm down about what happened in the town.

Din and the reader low-key flirting and teasing each other at the end is so adorable. Grogu with the cookie absolutely melts my heart like of course that boy is hungry.

So this is a slightly polished layout of my stream of consciousness while reading this. Does it make sense? Probably not. But I love this idea and you have done it justice.

Ahhhhhhz thank you for all of the lovely thoughts and compliments, im glad you like my story and I hope it continuesto meet your expectations!!!! And you made perfect sense darling!

To reply to some things:

Honestly, I chose the isolation for two reasons, 1- it made sense, especially for how the plot is going to play out, privacy and isolation is needed, and 2- im introverted and I like being alone, so I just projected

The town's people are great! They are used to having lighthouse keepers just up and leave because of all the weird stuff, so the second that one sticks around they were all overjoyed, because like I said, a lot of the people work on boats fishing so the lighthouse is super important to them

Din did wait and observe the reader, wanting to know what to do when to attempt to scare them off. But also like no, he tried keeping Grogu away from the lighthouse as much as possible, not knowing what the reader might do to him, and just being a protective father, but we all know Grogu is a little shit and he snuck out before Din could stop him

Reader dresses in the COMFIEST clothes, and honestly, I am very much a sweater and comfy leggings kind of person, so again, something I am projecting

I love that you and everyone is loving Edna, she is definitely one of those cool old ladies that sneak you treats and shenanigans when no one is looking!

Also because idk if anyone has pointed it out.... in the last chapter I thought I was heavily hinting at it, but maybe it was more subtle than I thought, Edna and her MERMAID were alot more than friends *wink wink* she's gay as fuck and thats why she made the joke about not liking NUTS

Din loves Grogu, in and out of this AU, and it was 1000% not his fault that Grogu got hurt, in fact he was trying to protect him! Din definitely panicked and the first person that came to mind was the reader, and while he didn't know them, he knew for some reason they were safe to go to for help (as well as knowing the lighthouse would be a good place to hide while some things cooled down 👀), but Din will always be cautious because he is scared for his son

Din is just *chef's kiss* 👌, an amazing father who will do ANYTHING for his son, no matter what it takes

The whole blanket thing literally came from my childhood, thinking about how my sisters and I would drag eachother around on blankets, and I just thought it would be great for this scenario

Like the reader is gonna get real paranoid during this series, im not going to lie to you, things are gonna get rough, but Edna is the MVP she's one of those people that could pull your darkest secrets from you just by glancing at you, and the reader pretty much assumed she was safe to talk to after she had informed her about the food offerings

Ok ok, as for the dudes, I was too lazy to look up their names and stuff but they were these dudes from season 1 that gave Din Grogu's bounty: the first dude is the one 'hiding' in the women's hygiene section

Din is just obsessed for human food at this point, and he feels things for the reader even of he doesn't want to admit it quite yet

Din also may be oblivious as fuck, but he's also observant, hes a bounty hunter for fucks sake, he needs to be able to pick up on these things, so yes in my stories Din is really good at picking up on emotions, even if he doesn't fully know how to react to them

Im aiming for a slow burn foc, but to be honest with you all, chances are it is going to be a regularly paced romance, which for my writing is slow paced, so yeah the idiots are flirting and teasing eachother, but also like they will not be talking about or admitting feelings for at least a few more chapters

Grpgu deserves all the cookies!!! He's a growing tadpole, who has been magically healing himself while in a coma like state, so he hasnt eaten in days, and if he wanted he'd probably be able to devour 2x his body weight and then some, so a few cookies recieved in some kind of mysterious way are well achieved

Merman!Din Tags: @writeforfandoms @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @honey-goth  @mando-abs @lux-cream-67 @rachelle-on-the-run @katcharm   @ladamari68 @bluegalaxyprime @my-life-as-a-bird @altarsw @zarakem @stargazingthenightaway

(Added the taglist in case any of you guys wanted to read over my thoughts and things bc I have some hcs and cleared somethings up ypu may be wondering about)

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Baby Love - Part 9

A/N: OMG its been a while!

Hope your all doing okay 💕

This is just a chapter full of fluff im not gonna lie! 💕

Waking up the day after the premiere i dreaded looking at my phone so i just left it on the side and headed to the kitchen to make some breakfast. I wasn't ready to read all the hateful comments again, as long as i didn't look i could just pretend they didn't exist and enjoy my day with Chris. I switched on the radio and hummed along to the song on the radio as i started cooking the bacon and eggs, i actually felt pretty good.

Once breakfast was ready and i had fed Dodger i headed to the bedroom to wake Chris up, he'd had a few drinks last night and had slept like the dead!

"Hey babe.... wake up i made breakfast" i said leaning against the doorframe as i admired the naked man in front of me... he was laying face down hugging my pillow with the sheets just covering his ass. He cracked one eye and looked at me, a sleepy smile spreading across his face as he reached a hand out to me.

"Come back to bed" he mumbled.

"Nope, ive cooked breakfast its getting cold" i chuckled crossing my arms and waiting for him to get up.

"At least come and give me a kiss first"

"I forget how needy you get when your hungover..." i rolled my eyes shaking my head but took the few steps forward and took his hand. Chris pulled me closer and rolled onto his back with a wicked grin. As he pulled me onto the bed with him we both laughed before i leaned forward and gave him the kiss he wanted. I suddenly pulled back with wide eyes looking down at him, i saw the worry flashing over his face.

"What is it? Did i hurt you?" He sat up suddenly trying to work out what was wrong. I slowly shook my head before a smile spread on my face.

"The baby just kicked.... like a proper kick. Not just the little flutters i've been feeling....shit! it did it again!" I laughed grabbing Chris's hand and placing it on my stomach where id been feeling movement.

"I can't feel anything..." he said sadly shaking his head.

"Just wait.... give him a minute"

When the baby kicked again Chris's eyes went wide before he started laughing, excitement in his eyes as he brought his other hand up to cup my baby bump.

"Shit..... i felt that!"

"I told you!"

"That was something else....." he muttered staring at my bump his eyes tearing up, I leant forward pressing a kiss to his lips quickly.

"God i love you"

"I love you too. But come on, your son is hungry.... and mama needs sustenance" i laughed jumping up and rushing back out to the kitchen, i heard Chris laughing behind me and i turned round to catch him following me as he finished pulling on a pair of sweats.

"We're going back to bed after though right?" He asked catching up and wrapping his arms around me from behind.

"I think that can be arranged".

Scott had called around lunch time and Chris had obviously told him all about feeling the baby kicking..... half hour later Scott was at the door!

"Uncle Scott is here to feel the kicks!" He said sounding far too excited when he came bursting through the door.

"Sorry Uncle Scott but your nephew is not very active at the moment" i frowned rubbing a hand over my stomach.

"Thats fine i can wait..... i brought chinese" he smiled holding up the bag of take out, my eyes lit up instantly!

"Ooh did you get..."

"Yes! Of course i got you ribs! Do you take me for a fool??" He asked looking insulted that i would even consider he forgot the ribs.

"Your the best!" I beamed over at Scott suddenly overcome with hunger at the mention of ribs! "Hey babe?...."

"I'll get the pickles" Chris called back before i even asked making me laugh, i could just imagine the looks being exchanged between the brothers but i didn't care. Weird pregnancy cravings were the norm by now. A few seconds later Chris walked in with a plate of ribs, a few pickles on the side.... as soon as the smell reached me i felt the baby kick.

"Hey Scott.... your nephew is kicking!" I called out to Scott who was still plating up his food, be came running out and dramatically dived into the empty seat next to me.

"Hey! Be careful!" Chris scolded his brother shaking his head as he handed me the plate.

"Sorry but i didn't want to miss it again!"

"Give me your hand" i held my hand out for Scotts hand and placed it where i was feeling movement "okay just wait a minute......" i said casually as i tucked in to my food, a moan escaping at how good this food was!

"Jesus, you really like those ribs don't you?" Scott laughed.

"You cant even begin to imagine the satisfaction i get from this right now" i pointed to my plate "its even better than sex!"

"Hey!" Chris moaned looking at me like i spat in his food.

"Im not saying the sex is bad.... because wow i cant get enough of you..."

"Ewww" Scott grumbled making me and Chris laugh.

"Sorry Scotty! But its true!" I took a bite of my pickle and moaned again "honestly, you have no idea how good this is right now".

As if the baby was agreeing he gave a kick right where Scotts hand was resting, his eyes went wide for a few seconds then he was leaning closer talking to my bump, introducing himself as Uncle Scott promising to be the best uncle ever!

"Scott you do know the baby cant hear you" Chris rolled his eyes at his brother as he sat the other side of me.

"Of course he can! Babies can hear in the womb Chris and this baby is gonna know his Uncle Scotts voice!"

I looked at Chris smiling and shaking my head "his right, the baby can hear some stuff.... don't worry" i grabbed Chris's hand "he already knows your voice"

"You don't know that...."

"Sure i do, he moves more when you talk" i smiled "he knows his daddy's voice".

"Promise?"

"Promise".

We eventually finished eating and Scott was happy enough that he had felt the baby kicking. We were halfway through some movie the two of them chose when Scott looked up from his cell phone.

"How was your social media this morning after last night?"

"Not a clue.... i refused to look. I was in a good mood this morning , i didn't need to read all of those shitty comments....it stresses me out and thats no good for the baby....."

"You may be surprised, i've seen nothing but nice things being said. Obviously theres still the odd comment.... but most are saying how their happy for you both"

"Seriously....?" I looked over with raised eyebrows.

"Yeah"

"Wow..... i didn't expect that after the last time i was seen in public with you"

"Anything about the baby?" Chris asked his brother who shook his head.

"Funnily enough no one has mentioned it! Im surprised to be honest i thought they'd be all over that, you weren't exactly hiding that bump of yours"

"Maybe you should make an announcement before it gets out some other way...." i looked at Chris and ran a hand over my swollen belly.

"We can do that if your comfortable with it?...."

"Honestly i just want to be able to leave the house without worrying what i'm wearing, worrying that someone will see that i'm pregnant before we've had the chance to break the news ourselves....."

"Okay..... we'll sort something out".

At some point in the evening i must have fallen asleep because one minute i was watching the movie with Chris and Scott and the next i woke up in bed. The room was dim the only light coming from a lamp on Chris's side of the bed. He was laying close i could tell from his body heat, i was just about to turn to see if he was awake or not when he spoke, but he wasn't talking to me..... he was talking to the baby.

"Hey buddy..... i'm your dad....." he said quietly and i felt him gently stroke my stomach "god i suck at this...." he sighed "i just.... i guess i just wanna make sure you know me and that i love you and your mama so much. I promise i'm gonna take real good care of you both....."

"You already do take care of us" i said quietly reaching a hand up to run through his hair....he looked up at me looking a little embarrassed.

"You wasn't supposed to hear that"

"Are you really worried that the baby won't know who are?" I asked looking into those gorgeous blue eyes of his that i get lost in way too easy!

"Well i wasn't until Scott opened his big mouth but now its all i can think about"

"Chris i promise you your son knows your voice already......"

"How can you be sure?"

"He goes crazy whenever your around especially when your talking"

"He does?...."

"Yep" i smiled moving his hand over to the other side so he could feel the constant kicking currently going on.

"See!"

"Thats kinda crazy"

"I know right?..... so can you please turn off the light and come to bed im exhausted" i chuckled, Chris quickly kissed me and bent to drop a kiss on my baby bump before switching off the lamp. He got into bed pulling me against his chest, his hand spread on the bump and mumbled a goodnight.

"Goodnight.... we love you"

"I love you both too".

I fell asleep with a smile on my face thinking about how god damn sweet this man was and i couldn't help but think about what a great dad he was gonna be.

Baby Love tags: @jennmurawski13 @mybabyboytony @ms-betsy-fangirl @vampgirl1997 @ajosieface @afuckingshituniverse @chmedic @esoltis280 @southerngracela @bethabear12 @letsdisneythings @sellulii @patzammit @katiew1973 @princess-evans-addict @deidrahouseofpain @siren-queen03 @shipatheart @little-dark-empress @barnesandrogersworld @dumblani @xxloki81xx @jesseswartzwelder @lizzyclifford13-blog @booktease21

[ocdhuacheng]

the beef.... and the leaf..... :(

okay so this is going to be really incoherent but i have lots of thoughts that are being thunk and im Feeling Everything At Once so youre going to have to deal with it

1) love that both he xuan and shi wudu are water gods/ghosts. its poetic u_u

2) where is sqx????? where is he xuan??? where is shi wudu’s head??? is he xuan just gonna keep shi wudu’s head as a trophy or smth? lowkey within his right to do that its creepy but its also kind of metal and whats the use of a man if hes not a bit unhinged. idk why but i was getting the image of pitou just sitting there with kites head, and i can imagine he xuan doing the same thing. ANYWAY, DO THEY EVER COME BACK??? I STILL HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS. and also! do we ever meet new earth/water/wind masters?

3) anyway. I LOVE HE XUAN. i feel soo bad for him. like lowkey i was totally on his side for this entire thing. like im not going to excuse him killing the actual earth master and stuff, but i feel so bad for him it hurts and if i were a character in this book i would have helped him. and obviously if i were him, id do the same thing. do you think he completely hated sqx? like its obvious he hated them, but he also followed them around for centuries, do you think theres any amount of fondness in him? I personally think there was. He didnt want to kill sqx, he gave them opportunities to leave, but I think it was only when sqx refused to leave their brother that he xuan was so hurt and betrayed. I think thats the reason he was so cruel to them at the end. if he xuan still had any positive feelings left for sqx after all the chances he gave them he wouldnt have made sqx and swd ruin eachother. he wanted to make both of them hurt

4) i also really like shi wudu, like he really is a terrible person, but i love characters that will do awful shit for the ones they love, but he did get what he deserved at the end and that really was the only way for his character arc to end. he definitely wasnt making it out of this alive. that being said, his death scene was BRUTAL. it was so good but also it HURT SO MUCH. and the way he went crazy at the end and tried to kill sqx in some kind of messed up mercy homicide/suicide, OOF.

5) and sqx: i love them so much. they really did nothing wrong. they had no idea! and when they found out they were furious and went crazy and wanted to descend to being mortal so badly. like theyre a good person and i also feel really bad for them. However, the fact that he xuan gave sqx the opportunities to abandon swd after they found out, and they still chose to try to help their brother, must have been a big blow to he xuan. But tbh I cant really blame sqx for doing that either. love is complicated and theyre siblings and theyve been together forever and supported eachother for so long, its hard. they know what swd did is wrong, and i dont think they were trying to get swd out of facing the consequences, but I think they wanted swd to get punished the right way, instead of through some unfortunate timing with his calamity. i cant blame sqx for loving their brother just as i cant blame he xuan for hating sqx. emotions are complicated.

6) so anyway. point is i love both sqx and he xuan so you can imagine the kind of pain i was in

7) the water and wind temples getting destroyed was so sad. like. its so final.

8) also the way he xuan worshipped the real earth master was so interesting. worshipping him to keep his spirit subdued is such a cool concept, was it genuine? i dont think it would have worked if he xuan’s worshipping wasnt genuine. im not even going to pretend to know how to explain this.

9) anyway that was the most satisfying and painful revenge arc ive ever read. its definitely my favorite arc so far but also THAT SHIT HURTED

10) anyway im gonna go lie in the dirt for a day or fifty

[what-your-eyes-cant-see]

I woke up and I felt sad. I slept in as long as I could even though I had responsibilities to take care of. When I'm sleeping it feels like if I don't wake up I don't exist or at least I can pretend I dont. I can prolong facing reality for a few more hours. When I woke my love was there. I couldn't make out any words for about ten minutes. Once I did the words were accompanied by waves of tears and hyperventilating. I told him I was a bad person and he naturally comforted me. He told me I'm not bad. He told me to learn from these feelings, that I have the chance to be better. I want to believe that so bad but I did it again. I made decisions that will upset me tomorrow and I will feel how when I woke today. What hurts me the most is not the damage I do to myself. It's the damage I do to others that kills me. It's the weight I put on them that they constantly carry. It's worry my parents feel when I leave without saying bye. The worry I may not come home. Its the silence they keep. The simple question of where I've been or what I've been up to and my simple response to mask what I've been up in hopes of easing their worry. Ive been watching scenes from euphoria. I'm a sucker for tv shows and movies that depict addiction. They hit home so much. There's this scene where the main character is fighting with her mom and it makes me tear up. But i dont really mind those emotions. Its weird but its the sad deep emotions i appreciate the most. I think thats the only the i really feel deeply. Maybe that's bad I can't really tell but i guess it's enough for me. Everything else feels so mundane. The only emotion I feel fully and deeply is sadness but there is beauty in listening or watching sad thing and feeling something. Relating to it and feeling deep emotions. There's this scene where the main character Rue says

"If I could be a different person, I promise you I would. Not because I want it, but because they do and there in lies the catch."

I rewatch those scenes over and over it almost feels like I'm watching scenes from my own life. Maybe none of this matter. Maybe its all words posted on a blog nobody will ever read. For whatever it's worth I feel every bad thing I've ever done. The weight my family carries I also carry too. The sorrys don't feel like enough anymore. They look like a mountain of apoligies that had good intention but held empty promises. This all feels dumb or like a pity party or words I posted that I'll regret later. I wish posting this would make these bad feelings go away but I know it won't. Change and doing better would but I guess the point of this seemingly endless rant is that I'm in at a point in life where I feel like I can't change. I could've done different today but I chose not to. Every day I have the chance to be better but I don't. At this point I feel like it's not up to me. I feel like Rue. I hurt knowing the hurt I cause my parents. The deepest pain I feel is knowing the pain I cause them. So if anything ever happens to me or things get real bad I hope they know I want to be better. When I steal, lie, or take advantage of them I hope they know it's not me. It's not the person I want to be. It's my addiction taking ahold of me. I know I should be better and I wish I could for them because they deserve that. I wish I believed in myself enough to be that person. I hope they see me for me and know I don't like the bad parts as much as they do. Like rue said if I could be a different person I would. I hope one day i can before it's too late. More than anything no matter how I turn out I I just hope my parents know I appreciated them and I wanted to better for them.

[artificialenvy]

CALLOUT POST

@currynahh / @currynya is a shitty person.

I am making this post because I refuse to let them throw around accusations that I'm a predator.

Reasons I believe they are shitty:

I have ADHD, but I'll try not to derail any points.

After not seeing my spouse since Highschool, they invited them to a discord server. I was brought along and given a "+1" role, as in "This person isn't one of us, just @twiranux 's +1. I wouldn't have had a problem with that if it didn't create and "In group" and "out group" where the people in the ingroup treated the +1 role as "not a friend, just a +1."

They have a room for venting in that server, as a lot of people do. I have seen people typing in there on three occasions and decided not to interrupt them for my own needs, however the time I got to start typing in there and posted a couple of messages to indicate I would be typing, someone else came in and made it about them. I doubt they meant harm by that, but I went to @currynahh and explained it hurt to be silenced like that. I wasn't looking for an apology, I was looking for a solution so other people don't get hurt. My proposed suggestion was a second vent room for if there were 2 people needing it at once on that large a server, it would be helpful, or atleast a rule about interrupting vulnerable people. They dismissed this saying "two rooms wouldn't help because what if there were THREE people" which, if there were three people at the same time one would still have to wait, but the line would be split in half and people would be able to use it if it was an emergency and the first space was already taken without interrupting.

When they dismissed this idea, I said (and I dont have the exact quote as I left the channel, something @currynahh is very particular about is exact phrasing.) "If there's no rule against interrupting I guess next time I'm in need to type and someone is already using the safe space, I'll just be That Dickhead[TM] and interrupt? Can't wait." to which they threatened me with a ban, assuming I meant I was going to actively hurt people instead of just pointing out that there being no rule meant ANYONE could be That Dickhead[TM]

I also pointed out the inconsistency of threatening me with a ban for saying I'd do what the other user actually did and cut someone off. (they never spoke to the person who interrupted me about the event, to my knowledge, and I never spoke to them or saw their name) so I referred to them as "the fucker who interrupted me." Not in a mean way, just.. Here people can be called fuckers, like calling kids brats. I apologized once they said they found that rude, but they kept bringing it up saying I was name calling.

This is Hearsay, but apparently they said the person probably interrupted me because of ADHD, they seem a bit too comfortable deciding what is a factor of someone's else disabilities without consulting them.

Them dismissing my problems and threatening me with a ban instead of trying to fix their server made me actually go to name calling, and I still feel it's fair to call them a heartless cunt. Heartless for pretending to care when really they just wanted to defend someone in the in-group, Cunt cause it's a great word and it fits. I know the word Cunt is seen more harshly in some places, again, so much here. They really take offense to regional and class based dialects. They went to a private school and were calling me mean for just calling a dude I had no name for as "a fucker" when to me, someone who's poor and went to public school in a shitty town in Ontario, it's the norm here.

Since they showed they really didn't care I told them they were fake and left their channel, my spouse chose to follow me which I didnt know about at the time.

They DMed my spouse with another person who hasn't spoken to my spouse or I in 6 years to call me toxic, abusive and a predator. My spouse said they wouldn't have that conversation without me, as its childish and unproductive to just talk behind peoples backs. When @currynahh kicked me out of the group chat, refusing to talk like adults, my spouse asked me to log into their account to participate since they didn't want to be cornered by these two people to talk shit about someone they care about.

They call me toxic and abusive because I vaguely know the passwords to @twiranux 's accounts, despite never logging in unless asked to (for example a daily event in a videogame that they won't be able to make in time but wants the rewards.) and because on one occasion while I was napping, my spouse forgot an agreement we made about watching a specific movie together and I was upset about that, as I'm sure most people would be if their partner agreed to not watch something without them. I tried to keep my cool and just stay out of the way of their enjoyment, but my spouse wanted me to join in atleast for the end so I did, still grumpy but trying to make the best of it. If they had waited an hour or chose a different movie, things would've been different but @currynahh doesn't want "excuses."

They call me a predator because the person I'm married to is 2 years younger than me. @twiranux and I have been together almost 9 years now, we started Long Distance Online Dating just playing minecraft, listening to owl city (our song's Honey and The Bee 🐝,) and making Garry's Mod youtube videos. We would've been about 13 and 15 at the time, though it is worth noting that our birthdays were less than a month away from when we started dating so 14 and 16 if you want to make that distinction, I was in class with people the same age as my spouse. They think the age is gross, but we were two neurodivergent kids who were extremely sheltered at the time (helicopter parents/physical disabilities) who could only have freedom online. We had met through liking the same movies and youtubers and knew eachother a year before, while I was asking for advice on asking someone else out, my now spouse confessed attraction to me and I suggested we try "dating" for a bit, which consisted of nothing new except drawing cute pictures and giving eachother nicknames. I dont know if I knew their age at the time, but I did think they were a boy which didn't change anything, just hopefully shows I wasn't some 30 year old neckbeard hunting for kids on the net, I was just a disabled kid who was caught off guard by a confession of attraction and rolled with it.

@currynahh says they have proof that we weren't innocent in highschool, as (they claim) we asked them to write nsfw fanfic about us, which.. we didn't? My spouse has no idea where thats coming from and neither do I so just a blatant lie. Not that it's anyone's business but my spouse and I didnt meet in person for about 4 years and anything physical took place after we were both legal adults, im not comfortable going into more detail.

After my spouse had me log onto their account to show they weren't going to be cornered by those two, I was allowed back into the group chat to try and figure out why they think im problematic, but @currynahh insists im just making excuses when I've just been saying exactly what im saying here. They say I'm sugarcoating it, I disagree. I dont have the exact words I said about everything, but admitting to calling her a Heartless Cunt isn't something I'd do if i were sugarcoating it as she suggests. This is how it played out they keep trying to shove me into this "abuser" box they framed me in without knowing me.

They would repeatedly spew paragraphs of "points" then block me and leave the group chat while I was typing up a response. They don't want excuses (read: explanations) and they don't care about facts (that they misunderstood certain things and was willing to clear up what I meant if they weren't so caught up on semantics.)

I will not go into my partners mental illnesses on this platform, but they have a psychiatrist who I've met and I have to (sometimes in a way that looks controlling to someone who doesn't know the problems) keep my spouse grounded. The Psychiatrist thought I was doing a great job at managing it, but @currynahh disagrees, saying I'm enabling (without even letting us tell them what the problem is or how im helping.)

Which brings us to the next point; they say I can't talk about the mental health of myself or my spouse because it will trigger them, meaning they block any attempt we make at explaining how it works. They treat us as a neurotypical couple and call it abusive when I'm literally just doing what's deemed best by a psychiatrist for my spouse.

For DARING to tell her to stop calling me a predator, she calls me a narcissist, which is just.. Very cool. Love me some armchair diagnosis. They also diagnosed me with anger issues (from one call in which I was grumpy and then me trying to defend myself from these accusations.) So really, I think docs are being paid too much 'cause @currynahh is doing their job for free.

Because they weren't listening to my spouse, my spouse decided to stop typing, especially since she was just going on long rants then leaving the server before we could reply. Whenever @twiranux gets a chance to speak, @currynahh would leave the server claiming it triggers their anxiety to face the consequences of what they said. Then they would tell me to quit speaking over @twiranux when I was just speaking on our behalf, while in a call with @twiranux due to these reasons.

Instead of keeping their nose out of our relationship like we were asking, they kept trying to tell my spouse (who chose to marry me and lives in another country) that im abusive because they think trusting eachother is a sign of abuse.

Instead of listening that we're fine, they throw a tantrum and tell us to go to marriage counseling (which, although I wouldn't be opposed to going, is very telling that they think people can just do things that require money on a whim.)

They say that "instead of saving up to move in together and have kids you should put money towards marriage counseling" which again, what savings do they think I have? My bank account has -$4.00 in it and my spouse can't work right now. We have nothing.

They keep bringing up kids and how would we raise them? Would they not have privacy? Its a stupid point they threw out there as currently there aren't plans to have kids and there's huuuge difference between a married couple knowing eachothers passwords and not letting your kids have privacy.

They keep bringing up the fact that we've lost friends before without knowing why. So if they want to private message me I'd be happy to tell her about how we left our last friend group after a dispute where the other people were claiming the N word was inoffensive. Or the group that actually was trying to get into my spouses pants and we weren't comfortable there. You keep making accusations then refusing to listen to facts.

Idk if I'm missing anything, if they unblock me and see this they will probably say I'm staw-manning again without actually telling me how and while having no counter arguments. They also don't accept my adhd for accidentally derailing, while using theirs to deflect any criticism.

Karina, you don't know us and you say even talking about our mental health will trigger you, so you need to accept that you're unwilling or unable to understand the dynamics of our relationship but just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it's toxic. I wouldn't have made this post if you didn't keep calling me a predator, but I need to clear that accusation publicly before you keep throwing around dangerous labels.

Grow up. Get some help. Learn that your POV isn't the only one.

[one-abuse-survivor]

Tired is when you're sick of life, or feel weighed down by the stuff around you. Sleepy is when you want to go to bed. That's how me and my friend do it, anyhow. At this point, I'm fucking exhausted to the point where I feel too tired to let it out but im gonna anyways. There's bits in here that I can't tell my friend, or anyone, so i'm hoping bc this is anonymous i can let it out. Right, intro done lol. Onto the story. Last night, i have no idea what time, maybe five or six, (all i know is this

thing ended at 7pm), my mom storms out of the room and comes back holding a bottle of water and her bag. She proceeds to tell my dad she found the bottle at the bottom of my bed, (basically im not supposed to have anything at the bottom of my bead bc asian tradition believes that youre on top of it and thats dirty or whatever). Then she pulls out my school photo, puts it on the table and tells my dad to look at it. Starts ranting about how I never listen, i look horrible, worst photo i've ever taken. 

Basically, I go to a private school, and they think I should look good, and then they spent some time lecturing me about how i was supposed to look right when i was in the school, I look like a boy, i act like a boy, my hair's a mop, I look like a hooligan. Start talking about when i dress to go to school, how my shoes aren't polished and one of them has laces that show the white inner. How my hair's messy at the back, if i saw someone in jeans and someone in a suit in the street, who would i think was respectful? They told me they shouldn't have let me into the school, they loved me too much, that's why, they should have let me go to this public school that has a reputation for being a mess, that i belong there, waste of money, they regret letting me go here, thought i was a respectable girl. 

Dad asked me again, who wouldd i think was respectful, the jeans or the suit, and I told him I don't know. We'll get to that later, but at that moment he sneered and snorted and looked at my mom. 'says she doesnt know' he jeers. I'd meant it as in 'i have no idea, please help me'. He took it as 'she doesn't know, and doesn't give a fuck'. I don't know how to look proper. they never taught me. they tell me that something looks good so i wear it. mom still buys my clothes for me. I have no fucking clue what looks proper and what doesn't. 

Anyways, somehow they moved onto uni, and my current work, and how I pull all-nighters and how dad thought i was smart but nopw he has no hope, how he sees me get up in the morning and know i'm going to fail the assessment, how i get distracted, how i take too long to shower, how i never learn, how i never help them around the house, they do everything for me and if he was in my shoes then he would work until 'smoke came out' (vietnamese saying), how he would be so grateful but i'm not and they're going to leave me (which is a normal threat for them lol) and how they're going to die (another normal threat, dad has a lifelong illness and mom has been struggling with leukaemia for years) and they're not going to pay for uni if i get a stupid degree, only if i get a good degree like they want which will actually help me (law), if i want to become an engineer (something im considering) then i can pay for it myself, then again it's not like i'm even going to get into uni, when they look at me, they have to think of the girl i was when i was five because if they think about me now they feel sad, they won't look at me because I make them sad, they had so much hope for me, now down the drain, no, down to the sewers, look at my cousins going out, one of them had piercings and infections and almost got tattoos and is a nurse in a prison with a husband who stressed her out so much she passed out at work, do i want that, that's what i will get if i dont work, basd job, assisstants have to buy pads for their bosses, horrible child, this will end one of two ways, one i listen to them and come back years later to thank them or i'll look up at the stars and wish that i'd listened to them and they regret having me and caring for me, if only they'd been better parents, they'd been too lenient, but i don't care do i because if i cared it'd show in my working to please them and i haven't done that so that means i don;t care about them.

Dad told me it was too late to change, then switches to tell me it's not too late, they ramble on about my internet use, (i have to ask them for internet) and i'm not acutlalyu doping work on it, i'm just fucking around, they kjnow, they know, i can lie all i want nbut it's true. Horrible child, they'll die, they'll die, That's the end of the conversation, we're not going to talk about it anymore. No, stop talking. I'm going to tell you this until i die. I'm going to keep saying it, beccause it's better that i say it and you not listen than i dont say it and regret not saying it. (okay, i can;t currently remember anything else of what they said lol.). By the way, you wanna know abt

[asks didn’t arrive and I asked for the last bit again]

ok lets hope to god this sends then. i think i know where i was up to - 'do you want to know about what was wrong with the photo' i think was meant to be that. anyways, yeah. guess what was wrong with it. i had a fucking splinge. like my hair was parted and a bit of the part was split. that's all i can see that's wrong with it. maybe my hair looked oily? idk but that's all i noticed. also said something after that about do u remember when dad asked me abt who did i think looked better the suit.

also can i add something i just remembered which is that one of them put folders on my shelf and mom told me she knew i put them there to hide what i was looking at on my laptop from her when i??? didnt??? put them??? there??? in the first place???? (the layout of my room allows the folders to block the view of someone from the door basically) i put new folders there after i think my dad put them there but i didnt originally put them there??? sorry it was a full ask rant and i have no idea what the freak i typed and what i didnt lol. but u get the gist i think. big fat lecture.

i am tired. my eyes were puffy and there was like this pool of snot floating on top of this pool of tears if you did get the ask sorry u had to read that twice. :(. i mean even tho u didnt see it i was able to let it all out. not sure if it made me feel better about anything but being able to do it at all is rlly nice. Thank you for that.

-----

No wonder you’re tired, nonnie... I’m really glad you could get all of this off your chest, and really sorry that you have to hear those awful things about yourself coming from your parents.

I’m a white European, so I don’t share many of your experiences and I don’t know how it is to live in a Vietnamese family, but I hope it’s okay to compare it a little bit with my experiences in my (very Christian) family--if not, you can absolutely skip the next paragraph! 

I have had a bunch of conversations with my therapist about traditions, religion, and misogyny, because since I cut my mother off, my grandfather has lectured me many times about how I am a bad daughter for looking out for myself and putting my life first instead of being devoted to my mother’s wants and needs. He told me that she’s sick and I’m horrible for not caring about that and abandoning her, and that if she doesn’t love me, I just have to work harder until I "crack her walls”. (As if I haven’t tried already, and as if she didn’t use her very mental illness as an excuse to abuse me). My therapist basically told me that sometimes, being the Disney villain in some people’s stories means you’re doing something right, because their vision of what’s right and what’s wrong (especially when it comes to daughters and women in general) is designed to hurt you, to make you put your family before yourself. That it’s never wrong to put yourself and your needs first, and that kids don’t owe their parents anything just because the parents brought them into this world--that was the parents’ choice, not the kid’s, and therefore it’s the parents’ responsibility to care for their kid, whoever that kid turns out to be; and not the kid’s responsibility to be the model child that the parents had in mind or to care for them.

Your parents belittling you for things you have little to no control over and accusing you of being responsible for their future deaths, for not knowing things that haven’t been explained to you, for not living up to their expectations without even giving you a chance to try, and for not “working for them as hard as they would in your place”, are all red flags of emotional abuse. Accusing you of things you don’t do and constantly drilling into your mind that they “know” you’re a horrible person who doesn’t want to learn or change is a red flag too, and probably an excuse to take the guilt off their shoulders for not taking the time to guide you in life and to explain anything to you before accusing you of not knowing it already. “It’s too late” puts the blame on you, but what it actually means is probably something along the lines of “It’s easier to scream at you than to put realistic expectations on you and then help you achieve them while respecting your boundaries and allowing you to make mistakes, but I don’t want to feel guilty about it, so let’s pretend you’re a lost cause, yeah?”

I used to go to a private school too, and my mother repeatedly told me that was the reason she struggled economically and that I had ruined her life. It wasn’t until I talked about it in therapy that I realised that I never had a choice in what school I went to. Same as I never had a choice in anything my mother decided for me. So how could I be to blame for the consequences of those decisions? And how can you? If they buy you certain clothes, then they have no right to criticise how you look in them. If they chose to put you in a private school, then the money spent is on them, not you. You shouldn’t have to “prove” you’re worth their decisions for you or their basic care for you--they chose to give you that unconditionally the moment they decided to have you in the first place, and if they refuse to give it or threaten to take it away, it’s becuase they’re neglectful and/or abusive, not because something intrinsic about you justifies it. You’re not a bad kid; you’re just a normal kid with very bad parents. And I’m really sorry that you have to put up with them. You deserve better 😔

I’m here if you need to vent again in the future, nonnie. Sending a virtual hug ❤

[relatablemormonmoments]

April General Conference

These are my personal notes on each of the talks given. This is to give those who chose not to listen to conference a chance to select which talks they would be comfortable listening to or reading.

Talks will be marked as such. This is the level of suggestion I have for interacting with each talk

Read and Listen to

Listen/Watch

Read

Don’t bother

Sunday Morning Session

Ronald A Rasband (Listen/Watch)

Prophets~~~

Daniel prophesied about the modern church

Joseph of Egypt prophesied about Joseph Smith

John the Revelator prophesied about Moroni

We are G-d’s children and will hear and embrace the truths

1 of a city, 2 of a family

We are one people, and our family will be reunited by making and keeping sacred covenants in the temple (that means all of us)

Turn to the Scriptures for comfort

The church knows people... yay  I guess

Bonnie H. Cordon it’s my girl!!!! (Read and Listen to )

The light pointed the way forward for all of us

Let your light shine that they may see

“The chickens could fast” “no” -> Apostle joins and now its a joy to feed them

Focus your light so others may see the light of Christ, not make the world generally happier

Why is family so important? -> Temple keeps families together even after death

Ella made a power point to explain to her team

“These are great 1000 watt examples, but I am a 20 watt bulb”

Shine your light to help others see

Jeffrey R. Holland it’s my other boy!!! (Read and Listen to)

Look ahead by looking back

Parental character of G-d

G-d is not an absentee landlord

G-d is not a cold, arbitrary autocrat, damning most of us with no chances

G-d is full of love

Hope for evidence

Hope to see fulfilled the promises of Isaiah and Micah and other prophets to have temples on earth

No “Until death do you part”

Heavenly Father’s mansions are no more than a decaying shack (without his family)

Heavenly Father’s promises extend to all of their children, no matter when they lived or where they died

We still have hopes that are not yet fulfilled

Modern Plague

“When we have beat this plague- and we will!”

Virus of Hunger and Poverty

School Shootings are a virus (HECK YEAH!)

Virus of Prejudice

Give our children a better world than the one we have

Holland said gay rights “or even hope for a marriage”

He was able to believe in spite of every reason not to believe

What we desire in righteousness

Religious deficiencies -> many religious leaders offer nothing to fix them -> including some of our own (Oaks cough cough)

If we lose hope, we lose our last possession

DANTE! “Abandon all hope ye who enter here” (y’all I love the Commedia)

When we look back, we did not come this far to only come this far

Miles to go before I sleep

Future will be miracle filled and bountiful blessed

David A Bednar its my other other boy!!! (Read and Listen to)

Why is the return of Elijah important - Melchezedic priesthood

My boy looks tired, is he ok?

Heart is used 1000+ times in the Standard Works

Our Hearts define us and what we will become

The Lord works from the inside out, the world works from the outside in

Not gonna lie, I get what this quote is saying but it really sounds like those CEOS who say “I got here by hard work all on my own buddy”

Invite into your life the power of godliness

Hastening of temple work

OOOOOOOOOOOO ANIMATION

1,000s of temples and 100,000s of men and women

Entire human family on both sides of the veil

Building up of Zion

It is left to us to see and participate in

Renovation for Earth

He sounds like he’s crying, is my boy ok?

President Russel M Nelson ( Read and Listen to )

Disasters and their aftermaths have produced a shortage

Enjoy constant companionship of Holy Ghost

Priesthood power can bless you

Book of Mormon chronicles rise and fall of two civilizations -> easy to forget G-d and reject prophets 

Good look evil and evil look good

Heavenly Father is quiet and humble, not boastful like Satan

When we are surrounded by uncertainty and fear, what is best is to hear our eldest brother

Success, happiness, and joy = hearing the words of the Lord

New Proclamation

Ok thats great and all but can I have our old unofficial logo back? This new one is just.... eh

[ravenaveira]

Wow, people really went ham in the notes of this post 

I thought I wouldnt get a response buuuuut surprisingly I did, so its only fair that I respond back now

This response is to @super-ana-maria​ specifically

NaruSaku had a chance, Kishimoto said in an interview afte chapter 700 that he did not knew with who Naruto should end up with Sakura or Hinata.

Show me proof, the only time he mentions NaruSaku having a chance is when he said he once considered whether or not to CHANGE his original intended ending and make NaruSaku canon instead, he thought against it and stuck to his original plan. It was just a thought that crossed his mind because of popularity, not because he himself wanted it. If he did, why would he go against his own wife who wanted NaruSaku? clearly his opinion on which pairing to make canon was far different from hers and everyone else at the studio who also wanted NaruSaku. Kishimoto ignored ALL of them. If it were ever a serious consideration from him he would have discussed that with them the way he told voice actors early on in the anime that SasuSaku would be together in the end.

Heres snippets to back up everything I mentioned

Read the bottom paragraph, Kishimoto explains that Hinata and Naruto were always intended to be married from the start, NaruSaku was never set in his mind.

This is from Anime news network discussing what I mentioned about his wife and many of the anime staff being upset by his, keyword HIS decision

I know people say he contradicts himself here saying from the middle he decided NaruHina but then another interview he says from the beginning but that doesnt mean hes lying one way or the other, maybe he decided NaruHina early on but wasnt concrete set on it until the middle, what he says afterwards solidifies that theory

From the middle of the story? Hm! What sealed this decision for you? I think what made me realize it was partly because, if you really look back and think about it, Hinata always supported and acknowledged Naruto, even before Master Iruka. She had the ability to see beyond his reputation and see the true person inside. I think I started realizing that they were meant to be.

So it pretty much falls in line with what I said, he had the idea early on but he didnt realize they were meant to be until the middle of the story, which would explain why it had so little development in the beginning.

SasuSaku however never had this issue and every interview about them has been consistent, Kishimoto and the VAs both say SasuSaku was decided during the early stages of the anime and it shows as out of all the couples they’ve had the most focus out of all of them, even the MCs.

Unfortunately I cant find the proper source to this but this is still basically what was said. There was a time he considered NaruSaku but decided against it because making her fall inlove with Naruto at this point would make her a terrible woman, which makes sense because she’d only change her feelings after Naruto became the village hero. That wouldnt feel very genuine and come off very shallow. Sakuras heart has always belonged to Sasuke, she was devoted to him even after he chose to walk down the path of darkness. So to suddenly have her fall for Naruto after being so devoted to Sasuke once he became a hero would make her seem like a terrible woman. She only loves Naruto now that hes a hero, not when he was a nobody. This wouldnt feel like love, it would feel like a rebound and alot of people wouldnt like it because of the message it’d send.

Imagine you rejected a nice guy who was a loser and everyone hated him thats been pining for you since you were kids. But you never had any interest in him but instead liked someone else. You love this guy for years even when he goes down a dark path you stay devoted to them up till your teens and continue to only see the nice guy as your friend. Suddenly he becomes very successful and everyone loves and respects him now and hes no longer a loser. Now you suddenly see him differently and decide you love him now instead of the other guy you've loved all these years

Wouldnt you think that looks pretty shallow? doesnt that send the wrong message? you’ve never been interested in this guy UNTIL he became successful, now you suddenly realize you love him. Its exactly what Kishimoto said, it would make Sakura a terrible woman.

Naruto told his father that Sakura was his girlfriend, in the 4th databooks entry one on Sakura it was stated that she waa conflicted emotionaly between Sasuke and Naruto.

Read the paragraph of the first photo I mentioned, he says he intentionally sprinkled little NaruSaku nuggets as a red herring, which was successful because many people fell for it despite seeing Sakura still being wholeheartedly devoted to Sasuke.

Prior to being a sasusaku fan, this is my OTP not NaruSaku, I’m a Naruto fan first of all and the fact that Naruto did not pay any attention to Hinata(the girl confessed her love and he forgot about it), Kushina wanted for her son to be somebody like her(Sakura is like her, Minato said it) and Naruto convinced Sai, that he loves Sakura and Sai guilt tripped her into a fake confessed, only for later on in Naruto the last, *cought* Hinata the last *cought*, for all of this to be nothing more then a lie and him turning into a scumbag, for the line that he told Sakura: “I hate people that lie to themself”, well Naruto lied to himself for what 7 years?

I wont argue with you here, even I think that was bullshit. Dont get me wrong Im not really defending NaruHina because personally idgaf about the ship and really dislike her thanks to that god awful ending and how SP is trying to shove her down our throats and try to turn her character into someone she isnt. So Im not defending NaruHina Im just pointing out the facts. NaruSaku NEVER had a chance, unless you wanna count that brief consideration a chance.

The anime ended up with ….a wedding, like a cheap SHOUJO story, in which the girl gets everything she was. So saying that Naruto is a shoujo story is basically the truth.

The manga ended in a better note with Naruto being the Hokage and living the life he wanted.

Again I wont argue there, thank god Kishimoto ended the story with the Boruto movie, something he actually WROTE and wanted to make. Because if he had ended Naruto with The Last, that would have been one of the worst endings in Shounen history, a Shounen literally turned Shoujo for its ending.

Dont get me started on how the anime ended on a fucking wedding we already got in the movie and not the ACTUAL FUCKING FINAL CHAPTER OF THE MANGA. 

How TF do you animate 699 chapters worth of content and then literally skip the final fucking chapter 700 in favor of a fuckin novel rehashing an already shown wedding. Tell me how that makes any fuckin sense, it doesnt, its like SP forgot they were animating a Shounen and thought they were doing a Shoujo at the end. And people have the nerve to complain the manga ending was bad.

Thank Kishimoto for the manga and staying focused on what Narutos ACTUALLY about. The anime spit on Narutos legacy and basically turned from the Shounen about Naruto, to a Shoujo about Hinata.

Dare somebody to tell me Im wrong, you know Im not.

[krawalito]

Reylo and my meta/predictions

So i was watching almost every video i could find on youtube and read almost every meta i could find online regarding reylo, kylo/ben or rey since i joined this fandom.

So first of all this fandom rocks.

And now i make my own meta and predictions for the last episode. While i don’t like to to adore myself with borrowed plumes i like to thank all of the people inspiring me on tumblr and youtube.

So first of all what is SW about? its about family, love, hope, friendship dozed with a little action. SW is not a pure action movie. SW is not a pure drama and its neither a pure comedy. So what to expect when a movie is about family, love, hope and friendship paired with some war and action? Well, there will be loads of love in it. i am not even sure if the so called Antis just refuse to accept that or if they are indeed not able to see it. but enough of them and lets start with my results of the investigation. I call it investigation because the last month really felt like it haha.

So what do i think happens in ep 9?

Definately Relyo. I have absolutely no doubt it will happen which was different when i came here because i was afraid of another jonerys tragedy (no i am not comparing GOT with SW but a ship is a ship and it broke my heart)

I am convinced that the force brought these two together and we all know that the force is strong. Why did the force do it in the first place? Because its out of balance and the chosen one which was assumed to be Anakin failed. Why did Anakin fail? It was his possesive love for Padme and a few other reasons i am not going to mention here though. Love made him weak. We could now argue love makes kylo/ben weak too but its the opossite. And why do i think that? First of all Ben is not Kylo. Ben is Ben he just chose to give himself a different name but deep down its still the same person. Its like in real life when people try to be someone else because the pain is too much to cope with. With Ben though its much more complex which deserves its own meta.

So who makes love stronger and not weaker? Ben Solo.

Who is Ben Solo? First of all he IS the last male skywalker. Thats a fact which has also been confirmed multiple times. No idea why people still questioning that. He is a troubled young men who is strong with the force and falls in love with Rey. Sounds familiar? Look around happens all the time in real life too. And we learned that SW is about Love. People who watched and i mean who really watched all the previous movies will agree with me on that. I mean Anakin and Padme? Han and Leia? Lukes love for his father? Obi Wans love for Anakin? I could go on and on and on...

Coming back to the force and why it brought Rey and Ben together. When the force chose Anakin it failed. why? Because the force did not know that it needs two. The Ying and yang if you will. This is simple physics actually. Put one on a scale and it gets out of balance. Why Ben? Because he has this Skywalker blood which seems to have a certain importance in the Galaxy. Why Rey? Oh i can already hear people screaming because she is a skywalker, too. NOPE. She is not. Why isn’t she? Does it make sense to have two Skywalkers bringing back the balance to the force? NOPEbecause Luke and Darth Vader/Anakin couldnt either. They both failed. but they did not fail REDEMPTION!

Yes, there will be redemption. There has to. You cannot have an inbalanced person bringing balance back to the force. How will he be redeemed? First of all its Ben who needs redemption not Kylo. There is no Kylo. He needs to truly want it. but what will initiate it? LOVE. Love from his family and Rey. I do not really know how this will happen but i expect that Luke and Anakin will play a role in it too. The Skywalker saga would not come to an end if not all of them ending it. so i really really hope we will see them in whatever way possible. Maybe in the world between worlds, who knows.

Who is Rey?

I truly have no idea but what makes the most sense from my perspective is she was created by the force in some way. Ben did not lie to her when he said they were filthy junk traders selling her but i highly doubt they were her real parents. i also think that someone bought her and was trying to hide her for her own protection. From what? from the dark side of course. She would have made a good new apprentice. Who was the person who brought her there? i have no idea. I dont think it was Luke or Han, they would have remembered and since both are dead i would have expected it to be mentioned. Maybe it isnt important enough and we will never learn the truth or it will be a big surprise and it was leia or someone else we do not expect it to be.

I dont think she will ever go dark and i also believe that dark rey is either a vision or it wont even make it to the film. Rey can have dark moments here and there but not to a large extend. She is light, she believes in people, she fights for love and she fights for what is right. that is also the reason why i do not believe she is palpatines granddaughter. There was no indication so far so that would be a total gamechanger and i doubt we have enough time for that plot. What i do believe though is he knows about her and is trying to win her for his side. The novel indicates she heard a voice saying „kill him“ but she refused. I could be wrong though and this is exaclty what happens. i wont like it i am totally honest here but i trust J.J.to make it make sense.

Palpatine alias Darth Sidious. He is pure evil. The latest poster and trailer indicates he is coming back.

but how? I dont think he will be an incarnation or himself but spiritual. His mind is alive but not his body. So what does he want? What he always wanted evil power. He thought Anakin will bring him all this power but we all know how that ended. He sees another chance, another skywalker and another person strong with the force. If he could win the both of them he will gain even more power than expected. I have no idea how this will all playout but i could imagine he promises both something they are longing for. How can he be deveated? With Ben and Rey.

Yes, Ben and Rey will team up.

first of all because they have to. Sencond of all because its their fate and third of all because they love each other. How? He needs redemption first and the rest happens naturally.

I believe his redemption arc will start at the end or middle of the second quarter. Or maybe even later in the movie. In the beginning of the film he will remain dark and he will fight against rey. Not because he truly wants to kill her. He loves her he would never do such thing but because they will fight on opposite sides. I also believe they both try to avoid the force bonding/galaxy skype. They might have dreams or visions or i dont know but they will try to avoid it. Which makes them DESPERATE!Because that is not what the force wants and neither is it really what they want cause they are CONNECTEDand that is why their relationship is VERY VERY COMPLICATED. What would be awesome is if Leia senses it somehow and rey and herself have a great chat about it. i would loooove that. I really hope that happens. She has to tell her that she wants someone to wear her mothers dresses. Gosh if that happens i will die in my seat.

So when will we see a kiss? Or their commitment to each other? When do they finally say it?

i really struggle with this one but i think it wont be so obvious and it wont happen in the last 5 mins either. I was thinking about the „i’ll come back to you i promise sweetheart“ quote a lot recently. I am convinced that Ben will say those words to Rey. I think he will do something dangerous and she will be upset. They wont kiss when he says it but i could imagine he will touch her face while he says those words. It will be breathtaking. and that is the moment when i say „i told you so and so did my 9 year old kid (i dont have one but a child can figure Reylo out). I dont even know if there will be a kiss. I would prefer it but if they make it Pride and Prejedice 2005 like its fine. As long as it is 10000000% clear where this leads to. I also think there will be a child or more. But i also think we will not see them. It will be mentioned i guess. Or it will be a vision. Could be anything. But there will be future Solos/Skywalkers. The reason is simple. Disney did not buy LF to end the Skywalker saga for once and for all. They have to leave this door open to have a chance to make new movies related to it. i am fine with that as long as it wont have anything to do with D&D.

So why do i believe reylo is a thing, canon, endgame and one of the best love stories in years (at least for me)

Because it makes sense and its obvious. Its obvious since the TFA. Why? That!

and that!

„it is you“... yes, she is from your visions/dreams Ben

yes rey, its the voice which sounds so familiar and yes thats your prince right there.

and dont get me started with TLJ

yeah we all know what you guys wanted to do in that elevator

this is pure.. so pure

this is not the end for the two of them...

[simptasia]

let's have you talk about dr daniel faraday for the ask game!! 4, 7, 13, 15, 21, 26 and 27!!!

thank you, lisa!! thats exactly the person i wanted to receive!!

Favorite movie

dan’s connection to the world of fiction has been tenuous. but char is gonna introduce him to some good stuff, including the back to the future trilogy. not picking just cuz time travel, i mean, they’re really good movies

fun characters, great music and the romantic beats between lorraine and george and later doc and clara are d’aww worthy so there's that. yeah he’d like them. there’s more Proper Hard Science Sci-fi out there but who doesn’t love back to the future? anyways char and miles grew up way more into pop culture then dan did so they’re gonna drip feed their faves into him

Favorite pizza toppings

give him a regular vegetarian pizza or a pineapple pizza and he’s good. or mix ‘em. like, pineapple, mushrooms, capsicum, that sorta thing

i hc that he’s a vegetarian and he likes pineapple on pizza (miles thinks this is fucking gross and compares it to like, putting grapes on pizza)

Puppies or kittens

kittens, tho both concepts are INCREDIBLY adorable. daniel faraday, with his delicate gentle hands, holding a widdle puppy or kitten. awww. another concept? you seen dan holding a rat? dan holding itsy bitsy BABY RATS

but yeah i chose kittens because in my headcanons, dan gets more experience with cats due to char having a cat (jean-luc). besides that, despite dan not growing up with animals, he likes them and they like him. mayhaps because he’s very nonthreatening and he likes to pet things. Funny How That Works

First impression of this chara

oh man, before i saw him in the show, i kept seeing him get mentioned and also fan-art so i gathered he was popular. so when i met him in the show, my first thought i was “ohh i heard of you” all happy like. and yeah. i wuv him

odd nerdy neurodivergent type who’s gentle and sad? perfect

Dream vacation

i’ve never thought about this because like i tend to keep characters in certain locations, like dan’s place (later dan, char and miles’ place), or the museum, concert hall, etc. this is reflective of how i have no desire to travel

maybe dan has no desire to travel too buuuut he’s dating char so that’s absolutely happening. yeah i feel like he’d go to places that make char happy

so cheesy yeah, but dream vacation is “spending time with those he loves in places that make them happy”. plus dan is hella rich so he can provide monz

If they had one month to live

so i’ve talked about how reckless dan is and how he has little regard for his safety. and he’s fucking irradiated his fucking brain. but survival instinct is still a thing so its another story if he KNEW he had a month to live. he must be used to hospitals and having ppl care for him after his accident (i hc that he was in that pre-island severely brain damaged state for 3 years) so he’s no stranger to that

he’d be strangely accepting that he’s gonna die. no freak outs, barely any tears. he’d enter into some sort of weird calm. a numbness. depression, basically

and reflect on how his life had never really been his own

How they’re mischaracterized

LOST fanfic is barely there and fic with dan way less so. so people really don’t have a chance to mischaracterize him. so what i’m saying is based on the tiny portions of meta i’ve seen AND some stuff from The Old LOST Fandom. and basically the subtextual attitude i’ve gleaned from how ppl talk about daniel

from what i’ve seen, i think some people think of him as 100% naive and humourless. like yeah he’s a little sheltered and he’s inexperienced. he doesn’t have street smarts, he’s book smart. but he def has a subtle sense of humour and i don’t think he’s all the way naive. i also personally don’t think he’s a virgin but that's not so much mischaracterization as it is a diff in headcanons

he’s also not a total walkover/doormat or a picture of innocence. what i’m saying is based on canon: dan can lie, dan can be bitter, dan can be passive aggressive, dan can NOT do what people tell him to do (even his mother, like he got a gf in college, for dan that’s an act of rebellion), dan can go to extreme measures to achieve what he wants (do i need to mention the hydrogen bomb again?), and a couple of times dan expresses a sense of humour (either making some little jokes or sarcastic remarks himself or being amused by other people)

YES he’s a good boy, YES he’s sweet, YES he’s polite. daniel is lovely, daniel is babby. but it’s not just that, ya know. he’s more complex than ppl think

p.s one fic i read had dan find char’s accent to be novel (and he was thinking “some sort of accent, english?”), which is... what. his mum his english. he went to oxford university. dan ADORES char’s voice but he’s not finding her accent to be this brand new, novel, foreign thing. yeah, he’s american, but he’s grown up with a decent amount of english culture. so a funsies reminder for anybody who wants to write lost fic, if char used english slang, dan wouldn’t be phased at all and miles (california boi) would be the one like ??????what