#no one’s on Twitter gonna know what possessed me to draw this

[xyrw]

of course the first thing I decided to draw in 2024 is this cunty ah Legolas

Wip

[cuddlesworks]

Love making pieces that only i will enjoy 🩷

[ryuichirou]

Replies

But also some news!

First of all, I wanted to remind you that my pricelist will be updated by the end of the week, so please feel free to message me if you want to take a slot to commission me with my current prices!

Second of all, we got our twitter account back! We ended up deleting that one post that twitter didn’t like (yes, the one that doesn’t have anything explicit or any nudity on it), which obviously sucks, but at least now we can jump back to posting more or less regularly.

And now that this situation is over, I can say about the thing that honestly tickled me: the last person who wrote a callout post on me right before our acc got locked (=the person who very likely caused the massreporting in the first place) got accused of grooming a 13 y.o. and had their account terminated the very next day. What a great illustration of how the fandom climate works, right? Hilarious.

Alright, replies replies. Some about Fellow and Gidel, some about Rook, Idia, a little bit of Lilia and some miscellaneous asks.

Anonymous asked:

wait, Fellow is it a good idea for Gidel to write?? Isn't he illiterate?? (I might be wrong on the writing part, but I'm pretty sure Gidel is said to be unable to speak because he didn't get an education :(, r.i.p to the poor boy)

But look at it, Anon! He clearly writes, and like a typical doctor as well! A highly educated man!

(Yeah, Gidel doesn’t know how to write lol I am not sure if Fellow is super literate either… just like the characters they are inspired by lol)

Anonymous asked:

I want to bite Idia’s thighs but I also want to nibble Lilia’s legs courtesy of your pic of him in those delicious Playful Land tights 😩

(this is about a sketch from ko-fi)

They really are nibbleable… nibbable… one would want to nib on them. And Lilia knows that :(

Thank you <3

irregardlessly-tish asked:

Since you started posting Fellow art I said to myself "I guess I'm watching that event now so I can look at the art and think yeah, he would totally get gang banged by them" lol

Tish! You’re great as always lol I hope you enjoy it as much as we did.

Fellow is so breedable it’s insane. I can’t help it.

unofficialwheatdog asked:

I'm gonna snatch Fellow away from everyone

Like that my husband, he fluffiness mine and mine alone

Mwah mwah to Fellow I wove him and the way you draw him

he's too good for them but ruined enough for me(lol me in my possessive era)

Omg real possessive era lol I get it, he really is fluffy to the point of leaving one speechless. But please understand, these boys can’t hold back at all… :( Be kinder them, they can’t help it!

I’m glad you love how I draw him <3

Anonymous asked:

Curious, u do non con/ rape art?

Pls tag if yes, I wanna see

I do, but I also don’t remember any recent noncon piece to tag anything lol I am definitely not opposed to it, and a lot of our nsfw pieces have at least dub-con vibes. I guess that one general!Lilia/Idia piece comes to mind first! And octopus!Azul/Idia that I drew for the same zine…

Maybe it would be easier to look through my pixiv logs; all the nsfw pieces are usually closer to the end of the log.

Anonymous asked:

You know I never had interest in drawing nsfw, I started a fanart blog with the intent of just making cute/cool sfw pieces maybe some ship stuff. However I am sick and tired of watching the twst fandom affect the mental health of my friends. And I know at least one of my ships will be threatened even if they just hold hands.

So here’s my plan: if I start receiving hate I will make an announcement: if I reach a particular milestone of hate I will learn to draw nsfw. I will make them kiss harder. Harass me and I will become worse.

Fr tho I want to be the brave idiot in the hope that others won’t feel alone.

Sorry for the late reply! Anon, you are already brave lol I like your plan. Become worse to spite them! And to support everyone who is harassed. And to have fun of course.

I wish you and your friends and anyone else didn’t have to worry about being harassed because of your ships. So please, take care of yourself, but also? Fuck them; draw and post whatever you want to make yourself and your friends happier and enjoy the fandom experience that you and your friends create.

Anonymous asked:

"something's missing..." might be your shirt rook, idk tho 🤔

(this is about this drawing)

Oh no, he forgot his shirt again. And no one at Savanaclaw is brave enough to tell him.

Anonymous asked:

 I remember that Savannaclaw Rook only cut his hair with a knife, soooo, yeah. How do you think first year Rook would respond to first year Idia and vice versa?

Honestly it looks like it lol He and Lilia have something in common…

We love first year Rook with first year Idia so much, Anon, you have no idea! And Rook/Idia in general, this is one of the things that I really want to draw properly at least once. For now we only have sketches…

But to answer your question! I like to think that Rook was very intrigued by Idia right away; of course Idia isn’t a beastman, but he is not only super bright and shiny-looking (unusual! Interesting!), but also is a very rare pokemon to see. It’s very easy to picture Rook getting excited and charmed by him, maybe he even had a period of a little obsession~ But of course none of this is in any way returned by Idia; to him being suddenly surrounded by so many loud and annoying people his age is already stressful enough, but Rook is somehow worse than all of them combined. He hates everyone from Savanaclaw, but they’re usually just rude jerks, but Rook? If only he was a rude jerk…

Anonymous asked:

Chen’ya, are you flashing people on purpose? What are you gonna do if someone likes it?

(related to this post)

Knowing Che’nya, he’ll probably disappear lol Never let them guess your next move. They liked it? Too bad. They didn’t like it? Oh too bad… >:3

Sometimes he is in a flirty mood though~

Anonymous asked:

I’m surprised Lilia doesn’t also spank Idia to punish him

He really should, and his spanks wouldn’t be as murderous as Azul’s! Idia is going to receive punishment AND survive!

I can picture Lilia stopping mid-spank with the realisation though: oh right, this isn’t his kid, this is Idia…

Anonymous asked:

(tw: self-harm)

this might be a bit dark but i’m curious: do you think idia self-harms? every now and then, i see ppl draw him with SH scars. i’ve never been able to decide if it feels like him or not. punishing himself, hating himself, wanting to control this one aspect of his life bc he can’t control anything else sound like idia, but also, being too resigned, lazy, or phobic of pain also sound like idia… little nutjob he is 😒 thoughts?

This is such a good question, Anon. It’s honestly still kind of easy to imagine him doing that. He punishes himself constantly, and while I don’t think this is necessarily about control, this absolutely could be about wanting to make himself feel even worse or to distract himself from the other kind of deep pain he’s feeling. Since we’re talking about a character here, as an artist I can also add that seeing him this way could be aesthetically pleasing, there are some very good artworks with this theme.

That being said, we usually tend to think that Idia wouldn’t do that. I agree that Idia being phobic of pain sounds very like him, but also? He is very detached from the physical side of things in general, I think. He would rather torment himself mentally.

Another reason for Idia and selfharm not really working in our heads is that I don’t think Ortho would let him. He is very sensitive to changes in his health condition after all.

[justhereformilgram]

Why yes I do find myself becoming enthralled with multimedia stories primarily told through songs and sometimes manga and other ways with characters labeled numbers one to ten who are all so complicated and deep <3

Under the cut is spoilers/speculation for the Kagerou Project and trial one and trial two of the MILGRAM project! If you’re a fan of one of these I recommend checking the other two out! Also discussion of suicide topics and general dark content considering these tragic characters

Ok those up above are just paired by number (prison number and order of joining the mekkakushi dan) but here is how I’d pair them based on power/themes + explanations, maybe even if there was a crossover or au sort of thing. The ones with the blue squares are what I think definitely fit while the others I had to go back and forth on

prepare for a ton of yapping. Lol. Lmao.

Kido and Haruka: Abandonment and attention issues + the power to conceal yourself so you don’t get noticed is really interesting to me… Kido is more confident and blunt than Haruka, and yet, I do think they match up fairly well.

Seto and Mahiru: I was debating on giving Seto’s power to Yuno or even Es since it’s like. I don’t know people pleasing/the whole motif of trying to see inside of people’s minds but Mahiru having mind reading powers compels me, since she’s so empathetic. It would also make her indirect murder so much more messy since she would have likely tried to show her love more if she could viscerally sense her boyfriend struggling, but ough.

Kano and Kazui: now this. This fits like a glove. They’re all about lies and pain baybeee… Yobanashi Decieve is such a perfect Kazui song it’s not even funny. (Using the Will Stetson Eng Lyrics but like. Come on)

“Act normal and all of that, but my heart’s still rushing fast so easily”

“I bit the fruit (apple motif!!) and the snake burrowed inside of me”

“But that’s only right, cause I’m a monster in kind”

“Listen closely to this coward’s beating heart, a selfish face that’s seeped in pain, the only me that remains”

“Though I say I’m really lonely, nothing’s ever gonna change”

Mary and Amane : Okay this is a more of a hear me out but hear me out. Both sheltered from the outside/real world, albeit for different reasons, Amane by her religious organization, Mary by her mom since she has Medusa blood. Petrification as a power would be helpful for amane in that murder and/or not getting hurt again, and/or punishing sinners. Also I think Amane would judge Mary since she’s all about stopping the natural cycle of death with all those timeloops

Muu and Momo: Simply they are both popular and that power of drawing eyes is so perfect for that. Less good for Muu once everyone turns on her but it still works.

Ene and Fuuta: This is so just because digital media like video games and twitter are so important to Fuuta like yes go into the computer buddy and cyberbully on another level. They also have similar outward prickliness <3

Shintaro and ES: this is really just about main characters and retaining eyes probably going to Es…? Wasn’t too sure of this one myself tbh

Hibiya and Mikoto (and John): Ok Focusing eyes I couldn’t really think of anyone since it’s very niche but ehh..? Graphic artist??? I do think a kagerou daze situation with Mikoto and John of John trying to save Mikoto in a death loop would fit them before the twist that oh no, sacrificing yourself just continues a different cycle…

Konoha and Kotoko: they can PUNCH. mostly did this one because kotoko would love to have the power to punch people to death and also. Well. Most inter-party kills. In konoha’s case due to possession but Kotoko would prob use hers for cold hard Justice

Hiyori and Shidou: ok this was Clearing Eyes since timeline shenanigans makes it so that Hiyori isn’t part of the group most loops. Maybe I should’ve put Kenjirou instead… well… welp. Shidou would go that far for his wife, that’s all I’ll say, and also the snake of knowledge fits him

Ayano and Yuno: Wasn’t sure about this one, since tbh Novel ES (the girl one) probably fits Ayano better, but Yuno having such a emotional power, able to express her feelings to another, while having everything she has going on could be interesting. Maybe Yuno matches Hiyori better I don’t know LOL Ayano is my favorite of the kagepro bunch though

[redeyesrahma]

How the tables have turned.

HalloweenNRoc prompt by @litheneel on Twitter

Prompt: possessed by a ghost

The spectral realm was.. Uneventful, one could describe it, After Lilia and Malleus Have taken-or more accurately- kidnapped Rahma and Grim while they slept to the spectral realm to throw a party for the ghosts, The Ramshackle Duo were asked to stay in their spot and wait for their cue to come out when their friends arrived at last.

Only that Grim was not patient, and to be fair, it was hard to occupy themselves within the timeless space around them, It was a shame that the phone didn't work, too.

Rahma decided to kill off the time by drawing the architecture of their surroundings, while Grim sat in boredom beside her, his paws crossed and a pout over his face.

"Fnaaghh..They are takin' too long to get here! I wanna start eatin' already!"

The feline like monster complained while his human companion chuckled a bit and shook her head, Of course he was eager to start digging in the food. Though he was right, Their Friends- (Schoolmates as they call themselves instead)  have not yet arrived, It was worrisome. Rahma could only wonder if they were alright, Perhaps they got lost? What sort of obstacles were in their way to reach the party?

"I'm done waitin'! I'm gonna dig in myself!"

Grim exclaimed as he stood up, Rahma perked up and turned her gaze to her monster companion, and shook her head

"Grim, we must wait as Lilia told us to. We can't roam around by ourselves"

The human tried to reason but to no avail , Grim had already started walking out of the room and Rahma scrambled to her feet to follow after him quickly.

"Grim! Come back here, we might get lost!"

Looking around, she noticed that her surroundings were simply stairs, lots of stairs, where did they lead? She had no idea, but the sight was making her dizzy and uneasy as she looked around for her roommate.

Suddenly she felt a hand touch her shoulder and almost immediately she jumped back in fear, though as she turned around, She saw a flash of white as her eyes widened and everything went blank.

Grim was puzzled when he noticed how quiet it has gotten, His henchhuman was supposed to be behind him!

"Oi! Where did you go, henchhuman?!"

The small monster turned around, hearing footsteps behind him, The perfect of Ramshackle finally caught up to him. Though, her movements were sluggish and stiff. However, it wasn't too surprising for Grim, his Henchhuman tended to get tired fairly quickly.

"Hey! I'm talkin' to you!"

Grim suddenly stiffened as his eyes met with the human's cold gaze, her expression shifted into one of annoyance and she groaned

"Is that Anyway a pet speaks to their owner?"

"ngh?! I am no pet! Have you forgotten who you are speaking to!?"

Grim was taken aback by Rahma's response, not once has she called him her pet, nor she had called herself his owner, not even when she annoyed or upset with him.

"All I see is a spoiled pet who needs to go to the timeout corner, You have been a very bad kitty.."

The girl stepped forward, walking towards Grim with a menacing aura, reaching to grab him, only for Grim to back away from her hand.

"What are you doin' !? K-Knock it off! I'm warning ya!"

Whatever it was wrong with his Henchhuman was scaring him! And he didn't know how to snap her out of it. Fighting was not an option, so Grim made up his mind to run back where they were supposed to be staying, with Rahma hot on his tail, chasing after him.

"Lilia!! The henchhuman is after me!"

The monster called out, hoping that the bat Fae would hear him and find a solution to this situation. Almost as if on Cue, Lilia appeared in front of him with a questioning look on his face.

"Grim? What's the matter?"

"Rahma has been acting strange! She is after me!"

Said girl had stopped her tracks when she noticed Lilia, her expression taking sour turn.

"He has been a very bad cat, No more treats for him."

The old Fae blinked in surprise at the human's tone, though he quickly shook his head

"This child is with me, Ghost. Unpossess her"

"Tch, and why should I listen to you? What are you, my dad?"

So it seemed this one was a bratty ghost, If asking nicely won't do, then a strict approach is more suitable, Fighting was off the table once more, even if Rahma had an ounce of magic upon her, she would still be no match for Lilia's magic or experience.

"I said, Unpossess this child."

Grim visibly shivered at the drastic change in Lilia's tone, the Fae was still smiling, though instead of a polite smile, it looked menacing, and the look in his eyes was enough to send anyone running for their lives.

"Ah..! F-fine.! Whatever.. This body is too weak for me"

It was quiet for a moment, before Rahma's eyes opened again and she rubbed her head, looking at Grim, who seemed to be still shivering in his spot behind Lilia's leg.

"there you are!.. Ah..did I pass out or something..?"

Lilia shook his head and smiled gently, urging the two to return back to the room

"No, Do not worry about it, it's best if you do not roam around alone however. You wouldn't want to get lost in this realm."

[rotessaboggs]

How realistic should a work of fiction be? ~aka this is me rambling~

Warning: This is going to be more like me getting all of my messy thoughts out of my head than a coherent in-depth analysis. So read it at your own expense lol. Still, I would really love to read you guys’ thoughts and opinions on this topic. This is something I have been pondering upon for quite some time but I didn’t have the urge to write it down until I saw people on Twitter “arguing” over what a therapist said about Mike.

Also, English is not my native language so sorry in advance for any spelling/ grammatical mistakes or ambiguous/ confusing word choices. I won’t mind if you guys point it out for me.

First of all, let me start off with some chit-chats (you guys can skip it if you like). I have no intention of “forcing” my opinions on others so I want to make it clear how I am like which can affect my viewpoint intrinsically.

A few years ago, I generally didn’t care much about films or TV shows, to be honest. I did watch movie analysis for fun but I have always been a book lover and I tend to gravitate towards classic literature because they usually make heavier impacts on me (I may use some examples of classic lit later on). I usually opt for classic lit because I feel more certain that it has the thing I love - a character-driven narrative in which we get to dive deep into a character’s inner self, explore all their turmoils in exquisite detail, and observe a natural progression in their thoughts and feelings. 

It was in late 2017 or early 2018 that I watched a video explaining the first two seasons of Stranger Things that I got interested in the show. It was specifically Noah’s acting and Will’s possession arc in season 2 that made me become a fan, not gonna lie. I was super excited to watch season 3 right when it came out. And … It made me so disappointed that I felt weirdly left out when other people all seemed to enjoy it. I thought maybe it was just me and I didn’t think of the show at all during the three-year period between season 3 and 4. I clearly didn’t know that Will is gay or pay any attention to the underlying problem in mlvn’s relationship. That kinda qualifies me as one of the general audience, right? Volume 1 blew me away and made me hooked on this show again. And then I came across posts and analyses about Will and Mike (in season 4 and other seasons) and I was even more blown away by all the subtexts and parallels (you guys are AMAZING!). In one way or another, I support byler because if it is really the direction the show is heading towards, it proves that the piece of entertainment I am consuming at the moment has so much depth, breadth, and width. And that has always been the thing that gives me an amazing sensation of blissfulness and satisfaction when I enjoy art. It makes me feel like a diver making her way down the mysterious depth of the ocean, being fascinated by all the questions and wonders.

Thank you for getting through that. Let me get to the main question now. 

How realistic should a work of fiction be?

I have seen a lot of people say things like “Stranger Things is a show about a girl who throws off a car with her mind and alternate dimensions with monsters but gay characters in the 80s is where you draw the line, really?” Although I agree with the overall sentiment here, there is always something irking in the back of my mind about this argument, about when things should be realistic and when the writers can just do anything they want.

In this case, I won’t bring all the supernatural things into this discussion because I think the matter is not whether things are realistic or not, it’s more about whether all the supernatural elements really align with each other in the grand scheme of things, whether later discoveries explain or disrupt the set of established rules and norms (which can be absurdly unrealistic) we have from earlier seasons. Although there have been quite a few inconsistencies, especially in regard to the Upside Down as people pointed out, there is still the last season 5 in which more will be explained so yeah … let’s wait and see how it will pan out.

What I do care though is the characters, their personal developments, and the dynamics they have with each other.

Back to the therapist I mentioned earlier, I don’t know exactly what she said but as far as I hear from other people, she explained Mike’s behaviors in a way that is favorable to mvln so undoubtedly, mlvn shippers use it as their proof. Meanwhile, they are pretty much against an analysis of a person with film degrees and experience in media literacy. On the side of byler, there is an opposite response: more in favor of the latter, of course.

In my opinion, this is pretty much a gray area. On the one hand, I can see why people cling to the analysis of the therapist because characters are humans and their behaviors and thought process can be explained through the lens of psychology just as normal human beings. On the other hand, they are also fictional entities who play a part in a story, directly engage the audience into a narrative, and are the means through which the emotional impacts are created. Rather than seeing this in a black-and-white manner like “it’s not realistic to do this or that” or “oh come on it’s fiction,” I would say the boundary between the realistic and creative aspects is pretty blurry, especially when people are just talking generally about the show without specifically focusing on a character, relationship, or plotline.

A basic opinion that I first had about this is that: the journey that a character goes through should make sense and make the audience feel like it’s relatable  to a certain extent (or at least understandable). But to adhere strictly to reality for the sake of being realistic isn’t it. That personal journey, with its progression, climax, resolution, and aftermath, has to serve a purpose, or in another word, it has to be purposeful and consequential. 

People argue that Will being gay, in love with Mike and potentially having his feeling reciprocated + having a happy ending isn’t realistic because it’s the 1980s - a really homophobic period. They believe that it would be more realistic and accurate for Will to be rejected or something along the line. But if it is the path his arc is heading towards, then I wonder for what purpose then?

(This thought came after I finished this whole writing so I don’t know where to put it except here. Consider it an irrelevant note if you like) So … When I think of the word “realistic” when talking about fiction, I recall a quote that one of my professors mentioned in our class: “Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.” I question if it can be applied in this case. Although the 1980s was not a great period of time for gay people, was there anyone who actually got to have a happy ending? If those people exist, is it “unrealistic” for us to tell their stories instead of the conventional one - the one with no joy and happy ending at all? OK maybe that’s not what realistic actually means and maybe I’m way off base.

To be as close as the reality of the time is an obvious answer that some people may cling to but is it enough to be the drive of the arc of a main character?

I am currently reading “The Tenant of Wildfell Hall'' by Anne Bronte and I am pleasantly surprised by how progressive the book’s ideology is considering that at the time it was published, women were devoid of any independence of their own and viewed as the properties of their husbands. To see a woman of that time (not only the heroine of the book but also the very author) deliberately going against that mindset is empowering indeed. The things happening in the book aren't necessarily “realistic” but sometimes we have to defy reality to get a message across and to create an emotional impact. Particularly when it comes to a progressive ideology like feminism or LGBT+ rights, by defying the reality, the writers are able to create a work that continues to be impactful decades or centuries later on. Or on a much more personal scale, we may say it’s a way of self-fulfillment for the authors who didn’t get a chance to live a better life (like Jane Austen with all of her books). Either way, there is a purpose.

On the other hand, there are also authors who don’t defy the rules and norms of the time and try to make their stories realistic. I always think about “Tess of the d’Urbervilles'' by Thomas Hardy in regard to this because that book hurts me like hell with its pessimistic progression and devastating ending. Spoiler alert, the main protagonist of the book doesn’t get a chance to escape the bleak reality of her life and the love story in the book doesn’t have a happy ending at all. Upsetting as it is, it makes sense when we learn more about Thomas Hardy. He is a person who is known for “his stoical pessimism and his sense of the inevitable tragedy of life.” Although one of his most popular books “Far from the madding crowd” has a happy ending, there are still a whole lot of pessimistic things and tragedies that plague nearly all the portions of the book. Also, sticking to a realistic portrayal of the society and having the characters suffer immensely can be a way of social critique, having the general audience confronted with unfairness and cruelty of this world, to encourage them to actually think about justice and equality instead of being indifferent towards those matters.

Now, based on what we know of the Duffer brothers (there are other writers as well, but overall, they created the whole thing in the first place so let’s just narrow it down to them), which side would you think they gravitate towards? 

Depressing as the show can get sometimes, it still offers us a message of hope and optimism, as well as emphasizing the power of self-esteem, friendship, and love. As someone who has always felt like an outcast, a second thought, and someone who tried to seek validation from other people to feel worthy in high school, I find the show relatable and inspiring, and I believe that it’s the effect the show creators want to bring about.

If Will’s feeling for Mike is not reciprocated and he somehow ends up sacrificing not only his heart but also himself in season 5, what message and effect do you think that would bring? Not just in the LGBT+ community but also people who find themselves resonate with Will in any certain ways.

Counter arguments

One may argue that well, if you want Mike and El to break up, it would still suck because she has suffered a lot and deserves love and happiness. Now I would support this if it were not for the things happening in episode 9 and her overall character arc. To be honest, I didn’t really care about El in earlier seasons because I tend to just hyper-fixate on one character at a time. But there are aspects of her arc this season that I find particularly relatable and touching. It’s her need to feel accepted, validated, and loved. 

At the beginning of the season, the foundation upon which she depends her self-esteem comes from the outside, which as we have all seen, causes even a lot more trouble to her mental health. All the bullies and harassment and then the lack of love received from Mike - all contribute to pushing her closer to the edge. At first, her coping mechanism is shrugging it off, putting it aside and pretending that all is good. It really doesn’t help that she can’t be honest with Mike about her struggles although hypothetically, they should be able to be so if their relationship is healthy and advantageous to both sides. I think all the lies are pretty much rooted in insecurity as she is an original person now without any superpower. She has been trying to find herself for several seasons but this is the first time there is no “superpower” - the main thing that many people see when they see El: a thing that they may depend upon in dire circumstances, or at worst weaponize for their own benefit. Her being left without it makes the issue of finding herself even more pressing because it seems now to her that she is no longer as helpful as before.

Despite the facade of happiness, all the distress is still there, waiting to surge up, breaking the dam when the time comes. That time being at the Rink-O-Mania. After that, we finally get the chance to see her true thoughts and feelings. We see that under the facade of happiness, those demeaning labels and names have really caught up to her and affected the way she defines her self-worth. It doesn’t just stop at “I’m different. I don’t fit in.” She literally sees herself in the worst light possible - a monster - something that brings destruction and death.

So the main character arc of El for the rest of the season (and I believe it will continue in season 5) revolves a lot around her defining her very self-worth (she alone knows herself best, not anyone around her; not Hopper, not Mike, her), making her own decisions despite the biggest authority figure in her life - Papa - saying “NO,” and most importantly, accepting herself (and her abilities) for what things are. If need be, she is going to use them in a violent way, like fighting against Vecna or the military, or use it to save Max - her dearest friend. When I first watched episode 9, I was a bit annoyed by the fact that they have El revive Max in such a way because it feels like they want to avoid a main character’s death. But when I ponder upon it a bit more, I see it as a beautiful contradiction with how her power has been used continuously in every season - something that causes damage and death vs. something that can revive life. There is no clear-cut definition like the monster or the superhero because these words imply certain qualities that completely contradict each other and cannot co-exist in one entity, that entity being El. She is Eleven and she is more complex than what those labels can ever describe.

Now this is exactly where I have issues with Mike’s monologue. Because he keeps going on and on about her power (a lot of which isn’t even accurate) and calls her a superhero. Many people have talked about this but let me put it down here just to make things clear: Mike is holding El back from her personal development. She cannot open up to Mike about her life in California, suppressing her negative feelings and thoughts all the way, because he has always looked up to her for her abilities and she can’t bear his pity if he knows the truth. She feels unloved because Mike cannot write the word “love” to her but once again she tries to put that aside. Mike’s words after she hits Angela triggers her traumatic experience at the lab - the one which makes her feel like a monster. And then when she finally gets to see that there is no such thing as a monster or hero, she being way more complicated than what others dictate her to be, Mike once again brings back the word “superhero.”

OK I didn’t intend to write that much about El, which is a bit funny considering that my favorite character is Will. I am feeling like I am driving at night without any headlight so let me end this part with a question: If she continues her relationship with Mike in season 5 without both resolving all the underlying problems in their relationship, it being the fact that they cannot really be themselves around each other and therefore, hindering their own personal development due to each being the main source of validation for the other, what purpose would it serve? What emotional impact and message can that bring about at the end of the day? What is potentially the climax of resolution of all these underlying issues that have lain around for seasons?

The psychological (realistic) and narrative (fictional) aspect of a character’s personal arc is so intricately interwoven to each other that to me, to erase one side from the argument (to completely cling to the analysis of a therapist) portrays a black-and-white way of looking at the show. I still love listening to character analysis of people who have knowledge of psychology though, because I love psychology a lot but I’m not going to forget that I’m watching a show in which everything has a sense of purpose and has to fit into a narrative. At the moment, we still have a whole season left and none of the characters have completed their arc yet, not to mention we are kept in the dark about some of the character’s actual thoughts and feelings and the only thing we can do now is deducing from what we see or hear from the show and other related sources of hint.

As you may realize, I have not mentioned anything like subtexts, parallels, foreshadows, etc. - things that are a part of the craft of storytelling, which further distances a work of fiction from real-life events. But as many people have already written amazing analyses in this respect, there is no need for me to mention it here.

So after all this rambling of mine, how realistic should a work of fiction be?

In my humble opinion, it should be realistic enough to make all the emotional and cognitive processes of the characters make sense, but reality should not shackle creative freedom. It should depend on the writers to decide whether to strictly stick to reality for social critique or to divert from it to present a message of hope. There should still be room for creativity and liberty to create a narrative (with all its parts like exposition, rising/falling actions, external/internal conflicts, climax and resolution) that serves to deliver the message of the writers as well as creating emotional impacts. These two aspects intertwine with and complement each other, and therefore, should not to be considered separately without mentioning the other.

In the case of Stranger Things, we have yet to get the whole picture of the narrative. Therefore, there is no conclusive answer as to why Mike behaves the way he does when his personal arc is still ongoing. Psychological knowledge may provide some theories but who knows if it actually aligns with what the writers have in mind. Until season 5 drops, it remains to be something like Schrödinger's cat.

If you get through this mess of a writing, thank you a lot. This is the first time I have ever written something this long without it being class assignments. As I said, this is me dumping all my thoughts out of my head so it’s really all over the place. Thank you a lot for reading! I would love to hear you guys’s opinions.

“Good morning! And in case I don't see you, good afternoon, good evening and goodnight!”

[raamitsu]

I know that big Tokrev twitter account you’re talking about and yikes…Now they’re trying to spearhead the theory that whenever Mikey is in dark impulses mode that it’s actually Shinichiro possessing him and I—Can we just have Mikey be accountable for his actions?? Like I love Mikey too but we need to stop giving him a pass for the things he’s done and stop blaming other people for his actions.

And then them being shocked that a person who is grieving is behaving...Like a person who is grieving. You can really tell that the OP has never experienced true grief before for them to think that the way Shinichiro was behaving was bizarre (and people who supported OP too). Like you stan literal murderers but a guy who’s grieving the loss of his family is apparently where you draw the line?? Get out of here >.>

Wow who are you anon and why are you spitting ?

Tbh it’s affecting a lot of TR stans’ minds to believe Shinichiro was still a bad guy like ?? I thought we’re collectively agreed that none of these characters are either good or bad? Funny cuz no one is saying Shinichiro was a perfect saint guy, but we can somehow grasped the idea of what kind of a guy Shin was from other characters that spoke highly of him. “Bad role model” “excuse violence” - Idk man. Shin brought Mikey to Black Dragon’s last gathering is not equivalent to teaching or educating violence, am I wrong? Like what do people expect? This is a manga that revolves around delinquents after all and most of them are involved heavily in it so don’t expect to see sunshines and rainbows all the time. As far as I remembered, she made a couple of tweets shitting on Shinichiro after the first one she let up still. I guess she deleted them due to the amount of people calling her out.

Aside of that, reading Chapter 270 makes me feel heavily bad for Shinichiro, as he worked hard to the bone to manage his family’s basic needs after their parents passed away, while both Emma and Mikey were just a kid. Being the first born and an elder brother holds a huge responsibility - in fact, he even had to bear all of that by himself. Furthermore, after Grandpa Sano passed away and Emma ran away from home, it’s possible to think all sort of emotions he tried to conceal were piling up, and it got even darker after Mikey passed away a month later. Shinichiro was the parent figure of Sano family, yet she and the people agreeing with her wanted to come at him just because he took down some disrespectful losers at the club :/

Seriously though, are we gonna forget what Mikey did to Sanzu? are we gonna forget the day he wanted Kisaki to realize his dream + said he wanted darkness and he didn’t care whatever method Kisaki used - then suggested Kisaki to join Toman even after Baji, Draken and Mitsuya were fully against it? are we gonna forget that he massacred all of his friends in the future timeline and the fact he never hesitated to show that side of him? are we gonna forget how he let his dark impulses took control of him and took South’s live and put Takemichi in koma? He was entirely conscious and knew what he did. He also uttered Takeomi’s name after he kicked his face. For someone who claimed to not be able to differentiate what’s wrong and what’s right, that is still not an excuse for whatever he has done, so I hope his stans are not being blinded by “how young and traumatized he is” till they can’t rightfully criticized his unforgivable acts.

[vyeoh]

this is your chance: wax poetic about an Empires or DSMP character of your choice to a fan who is new to both. Explain why I should love them. I need guidance in this new and meme-populated land.

okok this is a lot of pressure haha. Spoilers for EmpiresSMP and DreamSMP below, obviously. I wrote a lot so prepare yourself, anon

I watch a lot of empires POVs but the ones I most anticipate every week are Scott and Sausage.

c!Scott (I'll call him Smajor for the sake of simplicity) starts off the series chilling, not really getting involved with the rest of the server, and staying aggressively neutral. After all, he's an elf. He has lived far longer than most of the other rulers already, and will most likely outlive them for many years. So, the best thing is to stick to his mountains and not get invested in the dealings of mortal affairs, maybe sometimes causing problems on purpose and dipping because what's life without a little spice right.

But then, this demon comes to the server, Xornoth. He's going around causing havoc and wants to send the world into an eternal winter, but he doesn't bother the kingdom of Rivendell much so Smajor stays tentatively cautious but ultimately unbothered. But then, the puzzle pieces start falling together. The first thing that the audience noticed was was Xornoth sounded like Smajor, but we mostly thought that this was just due to cc!Scott voicing both of them and there was nothing more to it. However, then, the people the demon starts possessing start chanting in elvish. The demon hates mortals, and the elves are conveniently one of the two confirmed not fully mortal races in Empires.

This culminates when Smajor stumbles across a cave that contains the backstory of the patron god of Rivendell, Aeor. Basically, there's two opposing forces, Aeor and Exor, and both have a champion. In a previous life, those champions were two brothers, where Aeor eventually prevailed and banished Exor. In this life though, the champions are - you guessed it - Smajor, and the demon Xornoth.

So now Smajor is like. Well fuck. It's my literal god-given destiny to be responsible for defeating this demon who is technically my brother, and if I fail the server gets plunged into an eternal winter. And I have no fucking clue what is happening because I've just been here on this mountain actively trying to stay out of the issues outside my kingdom. We watch him panic and teeter on the verge of spiraling for an entire episode, and when the followers of Xornoth go to the End to kill the dragon, releasing Xornoth's full powers, he fails to stop him. Smajor is a character who was used to being the smart one, the prepared one, the one who has the least deaths on the server. But he's also a character who runs away from his problems and ignores them. Before and during the dragon fight, we hear the desperation in his voice, as he's thrown into a situation he is wholly unprepared for, and it's bigger than him going to the Cod Empire to kill their king, or assisting in other people's plans to kill the codfather. He can't run from this. cc!Scott plays this scene so well as well, as I've said before, one of the best parts of Scott's acting is how he's never super dramatic, but he's so effective in the little things like inflection to make you feel, viscerally, the panic and dread.

So after the dragon fight, Smajor realizes, I can't do this on my own. I've tried and failed. So he gets allies. We watch him, someone who has so strongly been an isolationist, learn the benefits of allies and watch him learn to trust others and watch him learn how to get that trust in return.

My favorite thing about Smajor's characterization is that he's an incompetent protagonist, but not in the way of the "plucky young adventurer". He's capable skill-wise, and fairly jaded and very pessimistic. However, his issue is that up until recently, he did not care about the rest of the server at all, and by the time he learned to, it was way too late.

Also, in 3rd Life, cc!Scott and cc!Jimmy were canonically married and they reference it sometimes in Empires. Like, Scott goes over to the Cod Empire every so often both in and out of character to kill and/or flirt with Jimmy, the ruler of the Cod Empire, which may develop as a secondary plot into the future who knows. So ty Scott for giving the gays what they want o7

Now onto Sausage: his is a story of Icarus, his hubris and ambition being his downfall. He's one of the two followers of Xornoth, who promised him endless power in exchange for his servitude. He started the series being eccentric, but not outright unhinged, but slowly gets more and more extreme as the series progresses, as he gets brought more and more to Xornoth's side.

One of the best parts of Sausage's character, in my opinion, is how his gradual corruption affects the people around him. Initially, he got into a conflict with the Cod Empire and was allied with two other people in the Witherrose alliance. They were allies, but also close friends. The fandom liked to joke that the three had sibling energy, and I'm pretty sure the ccs played to that even more lol.

It was painful to watch the other two members, Gem and fWhip, watch Sausage get corrupted right in front of them, and see them desperately clinging on to this old idea of Sausage in their head because if they faced the truth, it would mean that their friend was gone. Eventually, they do finally cut him out of the alliance, leading him to fully commit to the side of the demon. Sausage felt very clearly betrayed by this, and declared the remaining two Witherrose alliance members to be enemies.

He gets more and more possessed, and we even see the other Empires, his enemies even, slowly realize that something is very wrong with the ruler of Mythland. He starts doing more and more evil things, like killing people more, making sacrifices to the demon, and eventually helping to kill the dragon to free Xornoth. So things are good for Sausage, for a bit. He won, and is more powerful than ever. Then he finds out: he's going to die. Xornoth's possession is slowly killing his soul, and eventually, his body going to be fully taken over and he himself is going to be trapped in the spirit realm. So how do you react to this? Over the next few episodes, we watch Sausage struggle between "the demon is literally killing me" and "the demon has given me so much, and I love it", all while Xornoth takes over more and more of him. We hear him exclaim that "don't worry!! I'm still about 15% there!" while trying to downplay every time Xornoth completely takes over his body. We watch him willingly oppose anyone who is trying to end the thing that is killing him.

My favorite thing about Sausage is that he is undoubtedly evil and proud of it, but he's also undoubtedly human. If you like to watch evil characters go absolutely feral, he's the guy for you. He makes the deal with Xornoth in the beginning, knowing and fully embracing the evilness of the demon, but at the same time he knows what he's doing is detrimental to both himself and everyone around him, but he's gotten in way too deep at this point, and to be fair the demon has held up its end fo the bargain, right?

Also, I would be damned if I don't talk about cc!Sausage's editing. Every one of his videos is like a movie. The way he does camera angles and uses music is so skillful- every lore scene feels like something out of a high fantasy action saga (think: LotR). Every big lore event I always wait in anticipation for Sausage's ep because his editing truly takes lore to another level.

I'm just generally very excited to see where this series goes. Empires is such a good mix of talented builders and good lore. Part of the reason why the series is so immersive for me, beyond any other lore smp, is that they have the settings to back it up. There is a certain charm to the DreamSMP's objectively terrible builds (with a few exceptions) but in Empires, the settings help sell the plot so much.

Another part of why I love EmpiresSMP is how much the ccs are involved with the fan community. I'm sure you've seen the memes about Scott being on tumblr, and Sausage regularly goes through the EmpiresSMP fanart tag on Twitter and likes art, even ones not related to Mythland. Most of the ccs, in fact, have brought up tumblr content on stream at some point or another. Like, several ccs have said that they read tumblr lore theories and hcs and stuff and sometimes take inspiration from them. Fun fact: Rivendell's church was inspired by my pinned drawing; confirmed by Scott Smajor himself. It's just such a good cycle of ccs and fans being excited about each other.

As for DreamSMP, I'm gonna be honest here, the only person I really am invested in in Technoblade. I started watching when he joined the server, and he's the only person whose lore I keep up to date with.

Techno's fun to watch because he's like the Deadpool of DreamSMP. Virtually unkillable, very skilled and scary, but consistently cracks jokes and breaks the 4th wall during plot. His POV is just fun. Like, he does wild plans and gives speeches and some of the stuff that happens to him should be called deus ex machine if it wasn't for the fact that Technoblade is the one who's doing it, and all the stuff is grounded in the fact that cc!Techno is just that good at the game.

However, the fact that he rarely takes anything seriously makes the few times Techno is 100% serious so much more impactful. His whole character has a basis in being perceived as inhuman and being treated as such, and therefore in return trying to hide his humanity. So, when he shows that humanity, whether that's fear, anger, or genuine love for his friends, it really makes you go "oh shit."

Techno's often said not to have character development, but I'd argue that while he remains steadfast in his moral code, he develops leaps and bounds as a person. Like, at the beginning, he's brought onto the server to help Wilbur and Tommy overthrow a government; them knowing he's 1) an anarchist and 2) very very powerful. His character was more of a plot device at that point and was treated as such in the canon. Wilbur and Tommy straight-up lie to him about their plans to establish another government after they overthrow the current one, while he was led on to believe that they were abolishing all governments in the area. But he isn't a plot device. He's a person, as much as he only shows the terrifying, blood god side of himself.

After the establishment of New Lmanburg (the new government its a long story), his friend Phil joins. And for the first time, we see him be fully human with someone and we see someone treat him like a human. Like, we saw glimpses before, with Wilbur and Tommy in Pogtopia, but Phil is the first person we noticeably see he trusts 100%. Then Doomsday happens, and Techno essentially retires to the tundra. During this time, we see Techno learn to be more human, first with Ranboo, then Niki when he establishes the Syndicate. In fact, the two of them, along with Phil, canonically throw him a birthday party, which is a far cry from his treatment in Pogtopia.

Techno's development is one of a god learning to be human, and I just think he <3

[2996-sana]

Not the Jealous Type - Rosé

Rosé prided herself in being levelheaded and not of the jealous kind when it came to you. I mean, not really. You did. It started with your coworker, Tzuyu, who had taken quite a liking towards you in the beginning of last year which coincidentally was around the time you and Rosé started seeing each other. You weren’t tooting your own horn. Tzuyu really did fancy you. She said so herself, albeit drunkenly, during a late-night drinking session with your officemates, coincidentally again two nights after you made it official with Rosé. Rosé wasn’t stupid nor was she blind. She knew the first time she saw Tzuyu that the girl was practically head over heels for you, but it was two weeks in into a blossoming potential relationship when she realized and the last thing she wanted was to scare you off by being a possessive not-yet-girlfriend. So, she tucked that little piece of observation for next time and focused on you instead.

When she came over two nights after you finally asked her to be her girlfriend, you broke the news. The first thing on Rosé’s mind was, I knew it! which immediately turned to, I swear if she tries anything, I will not hesitate to break her bones and rui-

“Rosie?” you questioned, breaking her out of her jealousy induced trance. You were tilting your head in that cute little way that you always do when you were feeling uncertain and she felt the fires of jealousy and annoyance in her body simmering down. “Your forehead is all scrunched up and you’re pouting. Are you bothered by it? I’ll stay away from her if you feel uncomfortable.”

For the past few months, Rosé realized that she has never acted out on her jealousy, choosing to bottle it up. It worked out just fine and she avoided fights and confrontations that would’ve came with it. So obviously, it worked out just fine. At least thats what she was trying to convince herself. Why should she start acting on it now? She trusted you and that was what matters.

Rosé quickly composed herself and mustered up the most genuine smile she could in the moment, “Me? Bothered by her? Baby, not in a million years!” she scoffed, puffing out her chest. “You see, I’m really not the jealous type and I trust you.”

For a moment, she thought you saw right through her façade. With the way that you stared up at her all confused, she thought the words ‘I am actually seething with anger and jealousy right now’ magically made its way to her forehead. Instead, you broke out into that cute smile of yours and leaned forward to press a lingering kiss on her temple.

“If you say so, angel.”

In the next few months that followed, Rosé wasn’t sure her resolve was as strong as she thought it was. After that night, you and Tzuyu called a truce. You informed Tzuyu that you were happily in a relationship but you would like for things not to get awkward and for you and her to stay friends. Tzuyu obviously loved the idea, thinking that if she couldn’t have you as a girlfriend, she could at least keep you in her life as a friend.

So, if friendship was the agreement, why was it that Tzuyu jumped at every opportunity to make a move on you? All the while, Rosé had to act like the model girlfriend who never got jealous and stayed calm and collected. Why did she have to brag about not being the jealous type?

“Wow, you’re so chill about this,” you would always say. Rosé wanted to laugh. She deserved at least an Oscar nomination.

“Y/N, your phone has been buzzing nonstop!” Rosé groaned, pulling away from your lips, annoyed that she had to stop making out with you. “Who the fuck would text at 2 fucking am. Unbelie-” she narrowed her eyes at the contact name of the culprit and removed herself from your lap.

“What’s up, Rosie posie? Who is it?” you mused.

You saw Rosé battle with about a hundred emotions: confusion, anger, annoyance – before you could make out a lame attempt at a smile. She pushed your phone towards you.

“It’s Tzuyu,” she said through clenched teeth, trying to control her frustration, “she wants you to know that she found a super adorable picture of a fucking cat on Twitter.”

You raised your eyebrows at the hostile tone in your girlfriend’s voice before turning to her smugly, “Does that bother you, babe?”

“No!” Rosé didn’t miss a beat, her pride and ego taking a hit. “Why would I be? I don’t get jealous.”

“Hmm, alright then.” you giggled. You took your phone from her grasp and unlocked it, clicking the Messages app and reading Tzuyu’s texts.

Her last one read,

Tzuyu: oh n btw my friends have a small gig at the café this saturday. u up for it? hehe we never hang out anymore with just the two of us:(

You could feel Rosé looking over your shoulder, breathing down on your neck.

Rosé felt her blood rise once she processed what Tzuyu was implying. As far as she knew, Tzuyu has never invited you out before. The girl was getting too brave and it took all of Rosé’s self-control not to scream and make her way to Tzuyu’s house and set it on fire.

You turned to face her, feigning confusion and pretending to think about it. You had a small smile on your face as you stared at your girlfriend’s increasingly red face, and you really didn’t think it was a blush Rosé was sporting.

Rose scoffed, “You clearly want to go so just do it. Have fun or whatever.” she started picking at her nails and refused to look your way and you could tell you finally got her where you wanted her.

For the almost two years that you’ve been together, you grew amused at your girlfriend’s attempt to mask her jealousy. She would always act like Tzuyu’s (failed) advances didn’t faze her but you’ve caught her numerous times mumbling curses and words that were far from friendly under her breath when she thought you weren’t paying attention. Props to Rosé and her stubbornness to admit defeat but she really wasn’t as good an actress as she thought she was. It also didn’t help Rosé to have best friends like Jennie, Jisoo, and Lisa who snitched on her anytime they could but you decided to let your girlfriend live in her fantasy world and kept quiet about it. Plus, it was fun to see Rosé silently squirm. At this point, you were just waiting for her to break and it seemed like the time has finally come for Rosé to draw the line.

“Someone is a bit jealous,” you teased, pinching her cheeks.

Rosé slapped your hand away and gave you her most menacing glare, “Shut up!”

“You’re not denying it then?”

“Well, maybe if she wasn’t so set on stealing you away from me, I wouldn’t need to be jealous,” Rosé grumbled, crossing her arms. Bingo.

At her admission, you try to hide the smile forcing its way into your face.

“Stop! Stop looking at me like that,” your girlfriend whined. The smile on your face drops as you notice tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

You immediately sprung into action and cradled her, “Shit, baby, what’s wrong?”

Tears started to soak your hoodie as you hear your girlfriend’s sniffles.

“Rosie, talk to me,” you pleaded. Seeing your girlfriend cry was not on the agenda of Operation Make Rosie Admit She’s Actually Jealous and it just made you upset that it had come to this. “I’m so sorry, babe.”

“Don’t be fooled,” she silently growled. “These are tears of anger.”

“What?”

“I hate her!” she snarled, wrapping her arms around your waist. “She better fucking stop or on god I’m gonna start swinging!”

You laughed at your girlfriend who was clinging onto you for dear life. You decide to let her have her moment because you knew she had a lot of pent up anger towards the situation, so you spent half an hour listening to her curse and threaten anyone who would dare try to make a move.

By the end of her rant, she was out of breath.

“How does it feel to finally let it out?” you snickered.

She only tightened her hold around you, “Pretty rude of you not to tell me you knew, by the way. But I feel so much better now that I get to tell you that if you even try to entertain other girls, I will end you and her.” she sighed in relief, “God, it feels so good to finally bitch about it.”

You roughly grab her jaw and started kissing her neck, “That was hot.”

She tilted her neck to give you more access and started playing with the hair on the nape of your neck, “If I knew coming clean would end like this, I would’ve done it a long time ago.”

“Wait,” she pulled back, looking you straight in the eyes. “You know its all because I love you right? I don’t want to lose you.”

You pressed your foreheads together and smiled, “It’s me and you against the world forever, Rosie.”

[kittypawnyah]

Goodbye Marcy

Farewell friends

Thumbnail;

___________________________________________________

Heya everybody, Kitty here! And oh boy, many of you may be wondering, what the HECK happened to your channel!? Well i'm here to explain it, both in full and short.

Long story: A few days ago, I tried out a new editing software I had on my pc for a while. Adobe After Effects. After editing this exact video here, I noticed I didn't have the media encoder (which is required to render the vid) turns out though, as I was downloading this in a rush, I had downloaded a virus (since it was cracked and not legit). This virus caused all my data on both my local and harddrive to get decrypted, which I was not able to decrypt so all my art, animations and stories I have worked on over the span of 4-6 years are gone. Except for like the 5% of it that I posted or saved online. (these drawings were still saved on my laptop cuz I was too lazy to delete it, however I did have to re-edit) This loss of files crushed me obviously, but I had no time to mourn as this virus also leaked ALL my data, from my Google to my Youtube, to my Overwatch and even my bank accounts. I was absolutely powerless over my whole Youtube, therefore this person started posting scams and unlisting my video's. These past few days i've been working my ass off to get all my accounts and data secure, whilst not trying to break down and give up :) I ended up getting most of my things back, including my Youtube today. Not everything is back and i've secured some things, but I don't know for sure since they went into my Twitter the other day even with the password changed. So if you see anything strange still, do let me know! But this is basically what went down.

Short story: I had download a virus, which encrypted all my local and harddrive files causing my art, animations and stories that i've worked very hard on for 4-6 years to be lost. It also got all my personal data and every account I possess. This including my Youtube and even bank accounts. I managed to work it out with Youtube and got it back today, the rest of my accounts should be secured now too, but there is still mild uncertainty.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I hope this clears it up and i'm really sorry having been so powerless in all this. I kept my discord up to date: etcuGBWYjV and you can check it out next time you see something strange. I want to thank everyone on my Discord and different platforms as well for reaching out to me and offering me their help. It really warmed my heart and kept me going knowing so many people were supporting me during this whole thing. So one big thank you to all of you, you guys are my world. I guess you could say this video is a bit of a homage to my life's work being taken from me in one night, hence the title. I will not let this stop me, but it was definitely a hard blow. I'll try to keep looking to the future and not think about what I lost. .......................................................................................

Conclusion: Be super careful with what you download guys, even if you really want it. Do proper research and always back up your files. Be safe and think before you do. Don't be stupid like I was, being hasty never solves anything. I've learned it a couple of times before, but i'm certain I won't forget it this time. Sorry for the long fricking description, it was quite a rollercoaster i'm not gonna lie lol. Having said that, have a wonderful day guys. Take care!

[weaselbeaselpants]

Weird week behind me weird week ahead of me but I’ve done a lot of self reflection and came to the weirdest epiphany. The older I get the more I realize all my ‘problems’ with VivziePop - her thoughts on criticism;  the choices she makes in story telling; some of the people she’s worked with (not that any of that’s my business; I’m not her mom) really aren’t about Viv, but more about her fandom.

I’m speaking of the preHazbin era Viv here and as someone who’s only watch horny fish jump at the surface rather than jump straight into the Hazbin-fandom, but given my ‘noncritical’ fellow fans have told me that the Vivziefandom now is also terrible - I guess I’ll go over my experience and make the most out of what I do know.

I followed Viv in 2009 and fell off in 2013 cause I kinda just lost interest and found myself wrapped up in other fandoms. I’ve always felt amicable about her content; I could give or take designs or the way in which she wrote characters -- ((Zech represent!!!)) but it’s honestly surreal and really fun seeing this person I recognize make it big and improve so much. Like I’ve said before I am very happy and very impressed with Viv doing all she’s done in the span of TWO YEARS. wow gurl.

Trouble is, there was the particular breed of fan who really made me...uncomfortable. They felt almost possessive of Viv’s attention. They sang praises about her work in a way that just made me want nothing to do with it because I was worried if I drew those characters these people would be like ‘hey, I’M Viv’s fav artist, not you!”. They would  unironically write Viv messages like:

“you are a GOD” -- “I’m so not worthy compared to you” --“I wish I was as talented as you” -- “YOU ARE EVERYTHING AND CAN’T DO WRONG VIV”.

The kind of messages which were meant to sound flattering but, intentional or not, came off as gaslighting, like they were guilt tripping Viv about being better than them. This behavior, treating your favorite artist/internet personality like your superior and groveling like Starscream, it strikes a nerve with me; partly because I was this way with my favorite artists and influences back in the day,  but also because once I got a taste of that treatment myself I realized just how bad it could be:

There was once a girl on dA who was jealous of me because of the attention I got on my art instead of her. I told her that I wasn’t gonna stop drawing but also that there was nothing wrong with her art and she’d find her place. It was weird being put in that position where someone is very clearly upset at you but also looking for your approval.

The second was some scumball who I blocked in 2016. He wouldn’t speak to me, only write condescending, backhanded comments on my art; check on my profile daily; call me a bootlicker (cuz I took commissions) behind my back; redrew my art and would talk about me in his personal artist notes about how I ‘probably wouldn’t see this’ - oh yeah all the while he did fan art of my characters but again never spoke to me when I replied. When I finally messaged him about his behavior he said he thought I was “really overrated” and “bad for the fandom” cuz I took money and kept him from getting the love he deserved. It took messaging another person within our fandom, one I had been in spats with online before, to finally realize I shouldn't put up with that bs....

That guy who was stalking me btw did so while I was well under 1.K watchers and am still pretty obscure. Anyway, I had one guy unhealthily watching me for the wrong reasons. Just one. This is why when Viv says she “hates creeps” I 150% believe this woman and am not about to call her a liar who just can’t take criticism. Like, if you really think that, I’m sorry but you don’t know what Viv’s gone through from both her critics AND fans.

Of course, a lot of people will be like “I bet you’re just jealous and really just want that kind of attention yourself so you’re preaching to the choir���, but like...no. I am envious of just about any creator who’s the social butterfly I’m not, but, like, if I'm jealous of an artist none of that is that artists’ fault. Ever. It’s my own issues with being comfortable with myself are at stake. If I criticize Viv’s work it’s not because I see her as competition or my Squilliam Fancyson; it’s because I’m a critical fan of animation and cartoons and have my own thoughts to share on the cartoons of an artist I’m familiar with.  Jealousy/envy/mixed-admiration/godIwishthatwereme.jpeg feels are totally natural and valid emotions when you’re a creator. Envy becomes a problem when you internalize, weaponize, and scrutinize people on the basis of them being what you aren’t which -yes - some people do in the name of criticism. ((Although, I would hardly say some of the nastiest AntiViv folk are jealous as much as they are angry that this project they think is harmful is getting attention and using that as justification for some really shitty behavior of their own, which no, this post is not a part of by virtue of coming from a critical fan.))

Critique can come from either a good place or bad place; good critique can be used to bad ends and bad critique can come from a well-meaning place, and vice versa.   It’s the difference between many a criticalfan having a sour taste in their mouth regarding the Viv’s base but persisting in a critique+admiration separate of that, and this asswipemonster trying to weasel his way into Spindlehorse while also bashing Viv on a public forum for clearly vitriolic reasons. He was a creep.

So yeah um please stop insisting that every Hazbin critic is just jealous’ because a) there are people who have a past with Viv’s base and that clouds their judgement, but in a lot of cases that doesn’t invalidate their feelings or thoughts on her work separate from that, and b) I’ve seen what clingy gaslighting jealous fans are. Spoiler: they’re not so much Annie Wilkes as much as they are Tommy Wiseaus. You don’t want Tommy Wiseau following you.

Another bad vibe I really picked up on that I can kinda confirm is still probably the case now: people think that they know Viv and the Spindlehorse crew and have the right to send them shit they don’t need or WANT to be seeing.

Like, I talked with Viv once ages ago. I don’t remember what I said other than we were talking about Frankenweenie, I think. She was nice. Outside of that she said “thank you” to my comments on her deviations but that’s it. I DO NOT KNOW THIS WOMAN AND unless you’ve worked with or are a legit friend/mutual of hers, NEITHER DO YOU. But I don’t think every Vivzie stan/critic knows this. Whether it be people assuming she MUST think they’re headcanon is now canon-canon cuz she liked a comment they made; or some critic thinking they must have seriously hurt her pride because they’ve been blocked by her on twitter (or you know, maybe she and the rest of Spindlehorse is tired of getting @s and don’t have to time to read through your analysis so they’re gonna just block and move on cuz they’re busy).

Just because the creators talk with fans doesn’t mean fans are literally their best friends and have a part in the show’s direction. And yes, critics and reviewers fit that bill as well. Know your damn boundaries people.

If you find/make some kind of contribution as a viewer that’s awesome but you should never expect nor DEMAND the creator see it. The most obvious horror stories involving this and Helluva/Hazbin have been the Instagrams made by the crew being harassed by incestpedo enthusiasts, but it applies even to just @ing creators as well.

I’ve seriously had someone tell me to just take my criticisms directly to Viv and like...no. Why would I do that?

I respect Viv and the artists working with her enough to know that they’re working their asses off on an animated series and should not be bothered. I don’t want them to stop all they’re doing and reply to me. I want them to keep working. Also, that kind of logic makes me wonder how many critics Viv’s found because she found it on her own or if some obsessed fan told her about it - which is really messed up cuz if it IS just good critique you’re, again, just pestering her, and if it wasn’t critique but full on harassment WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU MESSAGE HER ABOUT THAT ANYWAY? I’m sure she doesn’t need to be reminded that people drew and said really awful shit about her on Tapatalk. My point being I’m sure what people think they’re doing is

“OOOoh Viv lookitwut this person is doing in our fandom we need to ban together against this toxic behavior”

but what they’re actually doing, and sounding like, is -

“Hey Viv I know you are working so hard on the show and you’re trying to figure out where to go from here but LOOKITWHUTTHISHATERSAID. LOOKATIT! VALIDATE ME VIV AND PUT’EM IN THEIR PLAAAAAACE!”

TL;DR Viv’s fanbase back in the day consisted of everyman artists and interests but there was this one breed of fan -who I hope was just a vocal minority- that ruined it for everything else.

Call it stanning or ‘simping’ or as it’s classically known, ‘white knighting’, whatever it was it really soured a lot of people on her because of those fans.

That’s why the DollCreep drama got so bad from what I can tell. Doll and Viv had a falling out and then called out eachother online where people who took it upon themselves to speak for them starting throwing mud.

Back in the day I remember Viv used to get mad at artists for ‘stealing’ her style. I think this attitude from Viv directly has vanished but I remember it happening because one of the people she thought was stealing her style did art for me at some point and they were basically shamed/chased off deviantART by a gaggle of these really nasty Vivfans.

inb4> “VIV WAS AWARE AND STILL WEAPONIZES HER FANS THO”

I don’t know that. And honestly, where I’m inclined to believe she’d do something like that then I think Viv is really different and has improved her business and public image from her college days. I’d be very disappointed in her if she was pulling a Butch Hartman or Derek Savage, but I just don’t think she is one, k?

Viv is more self critical and aware than any of these uber protective-gatekeeping fans give her credit for. She said on the Pizzapartypodcast that she knows the Hazbin pilot wasn’t perfect; she’s been able to identify the problems with old Zoophobia; this woman knows that criticism of all kinds need to exist and from what I see she sounds like she’s trying to get used to that. It’s just, you know, when you have nasty antis badgering you, stalkers, obsessive yes-mam’ fans, opinionated shit posters, r34 artists, entitled shippers and the NDAs of a company alongside your own branded image - all that negativity, even the constructive bits, tend to clump together and you just want to scream at it so you can finish the damn cartoon already!!!!

TL;DR: PART TWO

VivziePop/mind is basically indie Tim Burton.  Her work is fun, shallow and made with love but is marketed as being for everyone when it’s really not. Parts of it I love to watch; parts of it drives me crazy cuz of reasonswhatev this isn’t a review.

BUT any fanbase where people tell me I should just “expect what’s coming to me” when I’m trying to argue against dragging creators into fandrama is troubling. People have a parasocial bond with fandoms and their creators and they need to learn when to back off.

[ryuichirou]

Replies

I skipped replies yesterday, so let’s catch up! I’ll try to reply to as many of you as I can. Thank you for your support and asks!

Starting with a couple of very sweet ones, but also talking about some of our recent artworks, posts, but also about Harveston a tiny little bit…

Anonymous asked:

Ryuichiro do you do commissions? And how much?

I do! You can see my commission info + pricelist here.

I am always open for new commissions and work with a queue.

Anonymous asked:

I love you (as an artist lol)! ❤️ Your art always brings me some kind of joy lol thank you guys for sharing :>

Anooon thank you so much! I am very happy that our stuff brings you joy. It means a lot to hear that <3

Anonymous asked:

You rock, keep drawing we really love your art, please don't pay attention to those good-for-nothing shitty people who are defaming you, I wish I could have the strength like you do to draw  whatever I want and post my drawings in social media, that takes a lot of courage as well. Please take care. You are my motivation to practice my drawing skills.

Thank you very much for your kindness, Anon!! We are very lucky to have supportive people like you around, it really makes all the unfortunate news not sting as much.

I hope you’ll get to draw and post anything you want! Please keep having fun with drawing, I am very happy to contribute to your motivation – it’s an honour.

Anonymous asked:

Hey ryuichi, I've wanted to say that I appreciate you and your Art 🫶🏼 I'm gonna be real honest with you i feel really safe here. I love how open and friendly you are, and I feel like I can be myself around here and let my freak out, lol.

Especially after the whole drama that occurred on Twitter about Jamil's new PJ card! It's so exhausting. Anyway, lots of Love! 🫶🏼

Thank you, Anon! <3 I am very happy to hear that you feel safe to let your freak out here. Letting your freak out is very important!! 💪

Jamil being too sexy for puritans to handle was definitely not on my 2k24 bingo card and yet here we are lol Shouldn’t be surprised about it though, the card is insane. Of course, the actual drama was about people acting allegedly inappropriately, but I don’t know what’s so inappropriate about looking at a sexy png with bedroom eyes and feeling like you want to give all of your possessions to that png. Sounds perfectly appropriate to me!

Jokes aside, I am very excited about this round of birthday cards, even though Jamil’s is going to be hard to beat…

Anonymous asked:

Hii! Are you ok with 3 people ships?? If yes what are your thoughts on Rook x Vil&Leona?

Sorry if not, I am new here and I really like your insights on the relationships _:(´ཀ`」 ∠):

Hi, Anon! Welcome aboard! <3

I am ok with a lot of 3 people ships; usually the main rule is that characters in our ships don’t switch (tops stay tops and bottoms stay bottoms), and we tend to gravitate towards two tops/one bottom combinations, although exceptions are possible.

With this particular character combination, while I absolutely love Rook’s delusions and fantasies about having these two specific cakes and eating both of them at the same time, I don’t really like having Leona in any proximity to Vil much… To be fair, I wouldn’t say it’s an absolute no-no: a boy (Rook) can dream, I am just not super crazy about it I guess. I see the vision though 🤔

Anonymous asked:

Do u like leovil too? Or is it only rookvil?

Unfortunately, LeoVil is one of the ships I would consider a notp. Not only because of two characters that we see as bottoms; I also don’t like it in general personally.

Anonymous asked:

At some point, you should put up a counter that says "It has been [x] days since the last person who clearly sent an ask before reading the pinned post" and we'll all cross our fingers waiting for it to get to like a three or higher 😭

(for the record, this isn’t related to the previous Anons!)

Yeah, and the funny thing is that when we wrote that post I said that I’ll just start skipping these asks, but I just…can’t. I want to reply 😔

Anonymous asked:

I notice you have a couple of pics of Idia and Sebek kissing in harveston. It doesn’t look like they were just fighting so what happened to bring on this make out session?

To be honest, there isn’t any specific scenario that is behind those pics, but I vaguely wanted to make it seem like they just couldn’t argue anymore and started making out lol The tension got too strong, somehow they overstepped that boundary and got way too into it.

icedefloweringtornado asked:

So the EN server is currently doing the Harveston event and Epel talking about using biochemical stuff for gardening just had me thinking about how Leona also wants to upgrade how his homeland does things. These young kids so tired of old people.

Not to turn this into another Leona slander, but wouldn’t it be funny if Epel was more successful with this whole thing lol We know Scar doesn’t have a very good track record when it comes to keeping lands prospering and fruitful… I guess Savanna needs Epel’s help 💪

blackbutlerfandomnerddomain asked:

Fem Azul...🤤

(related to this art)

Yes….her :( <3

Anonymous asked:

I, a heterosexual female, am currently losing it over your fem!Azul. She’s so gorgeous, I want her to kick me down the stairs and force me into slave labor 😫😫😫😫😫😫

I wanted to yell noooo Anon don’t do this to yourself, but at the same time yeah understandable 😭

You know this woman abuses her charm like no other. Too bad not a lot of people in her school are charmed by her…

Anonymous asked:

lmao your response with cater “he is good at multiplying” help. the last thing NRC needs is horny hare cater…he would definitely get in trouble for messing around with the other buns (deuce and epel).

(related to this post)

And since he is good at multiplying, he could multiply for all of the other bun-boys at the same time! Multitasking, baby! This is definitely not something NRC would be capable to handle…

Anonymous asked:

I couldn't help but wonder if neige will decide to permitly host vil to keep him safe after seeing him crying

(related to this art)

Awww, well, for starters he would definitely want to invite him to hang out together! To cheer him up~

And then he will lock him in his house

Anonymous asked:

Thank you for seeing the greatness of bottom malleus. I'm so well-fed because of you. 💖💖💖

Enjoy, Anon, I am so happy you’re eating well. I am happy to provide.

When we first got into twst, I was genuinely surprised that there wasn’t a lot of bottom Malleus stuff around, so I am very glad there are people who share this vision…

Anonymous asked:

Do you think Malleus hordes anything like what a regular dragon does? If so, what do you think it is? (Besides broken cellphones, I mean)

I wanted to make a witty joke about him hoarding Lilia but your broken cellphones joke caught me off-guard lol

He is probably a hoarder! I think he would hoard sentimental gifts or anything people bring to him, but also for some reason I see him hoarding books.

He should be hording tamagotchi toys though.

Anonymous asked:

omg donkey!(insert random top) x dragon!mallues when

and who is shrek

(related to this reply lol)

I WISH WE HAD A TWST-FIED SHREK IN TWST THAT WOULD BE 3D FOR NO REASON BECAUSE THEY (HE AND DONKEY) ARE INVADERS FROM ANOTHER UNIVERSE AAAAHHH bishie Shrek I haven’t met you yet but I love you already

I wonder who would be a good fit for the donkey!(top) though. But I keep joking about Ace becoming a donkey in Playful Land… Someone got way too lucky, huh.

Anonymous asked:

https://www.reddit.com/r/HouseOfTheDragon/comments/1cpql71/which_dragon_do_you_think_donkey_would_choose/ None, Malleus is coming to sweep him away

EXACTLY. And good for Malleus, honestly. This man will make him laugh! ALWAYS!

Anonymous asked:

Your response about the dragon pussy reminded me of this game called Deepest Sword, where you have to "Plunge your sword deep into the dragon's heart!".  I imagine after a number of failed hook ups Lilia makes anyone who wants to fuck dragon Malleus play it first to weed out the more disappointing lays

Anon, I spent at least 5 minutes looking at screencaps from the game picturing Malleus LOL WHY DOES IT WORK.

Imagine potential suitors facing Lilia and being certain that this is one of the “you have to go through ME before you get to him!” type of deals, only to have to play this game for peepaw until he approves of your plunging technique. This doesn’t translate into an irl skill, Lilia!!

[hanijunk]

Alright boys, girls, and nonbinary folks of the world. It’s 5:36am (1/30 when I first started) as I decide to give up on my attempt to continue to focus on learning statistics, avoid studying for my two upcoming midterms, and put off my two actual essays for two different classes.

Instead we’re going into a dive about ✨ KazuFuuma ✨ . Is this me telling you you gotta ship it? No of course not, you’re entitled to your own ships! You don’t really gotta care about it as a ship. But I do want people to recognize it’s THERE canonically, and how disregarding it is extremely unfair to Kazuki as a character particularly. Also, I’m working on the assumption anyone clicking this at least knows the bare bones about what KazuFuuma (ex. You know they are a ship of Kazuki/Fuuma from Dolce, you know they are childhood friends, you know who Dolce is, you know about Honeyworks, etc.) I’ll be making references to specific things, but I won’t always go into heavy detail. Might just hope you know it or take my word for what it is, and go into analyzing it. Some I’ll put direct references to find, but some I’ll trust you can find it yourself. If you somehow read this MAMMOTH and want reference to a specific thing mentioned, hmu I can help you find it!!

Also I hate tumblr formatting sm if you legit wanna read this 7 page essay but hate tumblr format lmk I'll add it as a google doc link instead too. anYWHO

Before actually getting into the meat of things lemme preface some stuff.

Again it’s like almost 6am so this will be disorganized and very train of thought (and likely long due to the fact when I fly by the seat of my pants I’m known to get unnecessarily extensive). It’s definitely gonna be in large part why it’s important to recognize as a romantic relationship foundation and what about it shapes Kazuki’s character in particular. Maybe a bit of how it’s been built up and its general focus and implications. Dunno yet. We’ll see LMAOO

I say f*ck. Not a lot, just a handful of times. This ain’t something scholarly this is for my own enjoyment so if you don’t like that might not wanna read. And it’s not like spitefully I just curse a lot if you haven’t...read my tags before lol

Again this is through the lens of a Kazuki stan. Of COURSE I’m going to have some level of bias, but if anything that bias may help more than hurt because that means I become FIXATED and think a lot about Kazuki. Which plays into establishing just how important it is that Kazufuuma’s relationship is recognized, especially in a romantic light at this point. Lmfao. 

I’ll have a few more prefaces about the actual content below but to keep this from getting too long if you wanna read come below the cut owo

I have extremely limited knowledge of Japanese just taking a few classes in highschool (so like 3 yrs ago) and live in America. This means a lot of my knowledge is gathered through the english translations of the super duper incredible and lovely people in the Honeyworks fandom who provide translations (delaix and takanenene esp have provided so much for me being able to understand Dolce) and my own limited Japanese paired with Google Translate for things that remain untranslated.

This only will be drawing on information I have come in contact with and have access to and making assumptions based on that, most (if not all) of which is in the public domain. So things like the Dolce Manga Volumes released via Animate, exclusive 4komas, and Light Novels are out of my area for the most part (apart from again snippets of translations thanks to this fandom’s godlike and generous translators).

I will not be drawing on anything from the first Dolce album with the exception of Nade Nade. From a meta standpoint, I consider those songs as songs made as performance media as opposed to character explorations. Nade Nade is the exception because (1) it was released a whole year before the album and (2) you can tell it’s explicitly an exploration of Fuuma and Kazuki’s interpersonal relationship even if it’s in a slightly more performance based context than the songs that came out with the Dolce LNs. Easiest parallel I can make to show this is if you held Non-Fantasy, Yume Fanfare, and Samishigariya up against each other, you could tell the difference in intended audience and intended purpose the same way the Dolce 1st album, Nade Nade, and the songs of the LNs do respectively. Even if there is some basis to ground Kazufuuma, for the purposes of this essay I’ll be acting under the assumption the 1st album falls under the Non-Fantasy equivalent category.

THAT WAS A LOT OF PREFACING CONSIDERING LIKE 2 PPL WILL PROBABLY READ IT I just have a tendency to anytime I do anything analytical lay down ground acknowledgements for myself to work on just...cuz it makes me feel less guilty for any accidental misinformation even if I’m writing towards my future self to read lolll IM SORRY WITHOUT FURTHER TO DO HERE’S THE BRAIN DUMP

First let’s go ahead and establish why it needs to be recognized as an important relationship. Again, I’m a Kazuki stan. He’s my favorite character not only of Dolce but also of the entire Honeyworks series, and as much as I love him for reasons outside the ship, whether you like it or not Kazufuuma is an essential aspect of his character and narrative. Of course there’s the fact that him and Fuuma are childhood friends, so that’s going to in part define their characters and interactions with each other and those around them. They’re both going to be relevant to one another and important to one another’s stories to an even greater extent than the rest of the members of Dolce. But on Kazuki’s side at least, it’s an EXTREME amount. A running plotpoint in Dolce Diary is the sheer amount of dedication Kazuki has to Fuuma and how much his thoughts and decisions are influenced by Fuuma, whether it be how he feels happiest spending time with Fuuma, how he decided to get his piercing to represent he wanted to protect Fuuma, how he doesn’t want to dislike food so he can eat what Fuuma dislikes, etc. Not to mention running jokes about his borderline overprotectiveness and downright possessiveness of Fuuma, how proud he is when Fuuma gets praised, or that one 4koma that literally explicitly states he can read Fuuma’s mind when he thinks motherfucking ‘dirty thoughts’ about his childhood friend (Fuuma). I still don’t know what the fuck to make of that last bit. Genuinely. Or the fact it’s a fucking running joke. As in it’s not a one off. It’s been brought up multiple times. Kazuki what the fuck. 

That’s not to say that he doesn’t have character outside of Fuuma or he doesn’t interact with people other than Fuuma. He’s great friends with Sara, Girisha, and Kippei and is shown time and time again to have fun interactions with all of them, generally acting as the best support friend for every member of the group, not Fuuma alone. For instance how he helps Kippei with his self confidence issues or stays over at Sara’s to protect him from a cockroach (which he fails at lol). Nor is that to say all his interactions involving Fuuma focus solely on his devotion to Fuuma, especially in instances where the manga focuses on Dolce as a group dynamic (though even in that setting there are times where jokes about his devotion are thrown in). He’s kind, he’s stupid, he’s friendly, he’s an amazing character in his own right, and I love him for all those reasons. But that doesn’t change the fact a major part of his character and his character interactions are rooted in Fuuma, and arguably some of his most interesting, eccentric, and notable behaviors and traits revolve around Fuuma (again the mind reading for example).

Hell let’s take it one step further. If you look at the character bios of the Dolce members, you get everyone’s motives for being an idol and interests. Of them, Kazuki is the only one to have another character mentioned directly, not to mention that supporting Fuuma is explicitly stated to be his primary motive as to why he became an idol. Not even Fuuma’s sister is mentioned, though two arguments can be made for this. The first would be that Fuuma’s backstory about wanting to fulfill his dream for himself and his sister was decided later to explain Fuuma’s choice to crossdress though it can be argued it was intentionally done to leave it as a reveal at a later date, to which I would argue I don’t think this backstory was a choice in post. While Fuuma’s dedicated Dolce Diary extra exploring that backstory was released a little less than a year after Dolce was revealed, the preview to set up Fuuma’s backstory was actually the first thing released after the character bios on the Dolce Official Twitter page if you exclude a drawing of Dolce from Yamako. The second argument could be that information about his sister was intentionally withheld to set up the reveal when Fuuma’s extra released to explore it. However, going by that logic (which I do agree with), that would also mean that Fuuma’s inclusion and importance in Kazuki’s character bio also set up his dedicated extra, which I don’t think would be incorrect to assume considering what his actual extra turned out being.

Which brings me to the thing that makes it inexplicable to write off the romantic implications behind Kazufuuma: Kazuki’s dedicated Dolce Diary extra, Suki. I shipped Kazufuuma before even knowing of Suki, sure. But the fact that Suki even exists is a shock to me and drove into me the fact that Kazufuuma wasn’t just my own projection. Again, it’s not a surprise that Fuuma shapes Kazuki’s life. They’re childhood friends, of course they’re going to be important to each other. But this extra explicitly brought Kazuki’s feelings towards Fuuma under a direct spotlight. At first I was thinking oh, this extra was just to acknowledge the fact that Kazuki and Fuuma’s relationship can have romantic implications, but the end of it the conclusion that we got was that it didn’t matter what type of “like” he felt for Fuuma. Originally, I thought it wasn’t anything more than saying there are all types of like, and it doesn’t always need to be explicitly defined, but I appreciated the fact they were aware that they were writing Kazuki in a way that conveyed romantic implications. 

Then I thought about it because, again, I love Kazuki of course I’m going to think about his character extra, and realized...that’s not how these character extras have worked. There are only three character extras out as far as I know and have read: Fuuma, Kippei, and Kazuki. If we look at Fuuma and Kippei’s, each extra had a conclusion, sure, but they didn’t have a resolution. Rather, they were simply setting up explicitly what each character’s primary character arc and conflict were. Fuuma’s extra brought attention to the fact that he’s particularly a crossdressing idol by exploring the motives behind it. His choice to be a crossdressing idol is constantly under fire both by himself and the world around him. He’s not immune to those who consider his crossdressing strange, and a part of his story is both finding people who accept his decision to crossdress and to succeed for himself as a crossdressing idol. It’s an essential part of how we understand and define him as a character and it’s a central part of how he interacts with the world around him. For Kippei, it lays the severity of his insecurity under the spotlight and his journey and motives for improving himself. Again, this isn’t something isolated and resolved in the extra; his extreme insecurity and negativity is constantly affecting how he interacts with practically everyone from his fellow Dolce members to his fans despite the fact in all honesty? He’s fucking insanely talented in his own right, his own brother mentioning how smart he is and how he has amazing reflexes. For Kippei, his negativity is an essential part of how we understand and define him and central to how he interacts with the world as much as Fuuma’s decision to crossdress is to him.

Which brings us back to Kazuki, of course. In his dedicated extra, in the chapter that’s supposed to explore and establish and bring attention to an essential part of his character, the aspect of himself under investigation is how he feels about Fuuma. It’s not just how he behaves around Fuuma, it’s explicitly an exploration of his feelings, on top of the fact it’s explicitly an exploration about whether or not he likes Fuuma r o m a n t i c a l l y. Literally the conflict is spurred on by someone outright asking “Do you like him?” and having to clarify “I mean romantically.” What they decided to focus on for Kazuki’s character and emphasize and establish is that Kazuki’s like towards Fuuma toes the line between friendship and romance. His ambiguous feelings towards Fuuma (if we leave them inconclusive as Suki did) are just like Fuuma’s crossdressing and Kippei’s insecurity in the sense the weight of whatever those feelings may be are seen in how he interacts with the world around him and influences his behaviors. It would be another story if they introduced the potential and shut it down all within the extra, because then his central conflict would to me be less directly open to romantic potential and more simply about how his arc was meant to explore the dynamic of the behavior of an extremely dedicated best friend. The fact that he may be romantically attracted to Fuuma or may be only platonically dedicated to Fuuma is instead something that looms over Kazuki in the same way Fuuma’s decision to crossdress constantly looms over him. It’s what Dolce wanted to point to and say this is Kazuki’s central character conflict and central arc: exploring what type of feelings he has towards Fuuma. 

Sure, it can be argued that there’s only three Dolce Diary character extras, there’s not enough to be sure about that being the purpose of the extras unless we get the other two’s extras. First, at this point I honestly don’t know if or when they’re going to release an extra revolving around Sara and Girisha just because not only has it been over a year and a half since the latest Dolce Diary Character Extra (Kazuki’s) was released despite the gap between the first and latest Dolce Diary Character Extra (Fuuma’s and Kazuki’s) were within a year of release but also because the Dolce 4komas and comics they’ve been posting to Twitter have decreased (last one being over half a year ago) potentially due to them deciding to focus on releasing Dolce manga content through the purchasable volumes instead. (This is not particularly related to the Kazufuuma argument, just wanted to put out there my two cents on what Sara and Girisha’s extra/focal arc would be. Based on a large part of the Dolce Diary in conjuncture with Can’t an Idol Fall in Love, I’d argue Sara’s would be his journey to regain his passion for performing, and if it’s not that I’d say it’d be coming out of his self-imposed isolation and opening up to people again. As for Girisha, I have less of a concrete idea but I’m assuming it’d be something pertaining to how people often misconceive him whether it be in tandem with his determination, his optimism and sociability, or his stupidity/ability to ignore those misconceptions and work past them. But Girisha is treated like the comedic relief 90% of the time so I’m not entirely sure, but his primary conflict is definitely rooted in misconceptions of him being his roadblock imo. #MoreGirishaContentPlz) That being said, I personally feel like the three are already enough evidence, especially considering it would be honestly even more cruel for Kazuki’s character-centric extra to be focusing on something that wasn’t essential to his character and character arc, anyway. And though it’s not explicitly stated that these chapters are extras exploring a central character, you can kind of tell based on how they are (to my knowledge) the only Dolce Diary updates with cover/title cards each which include their focal character front and center. So working off that fact, the Kazuki-centric chapter established that a pillar to his narrative was his feelings towards Fuuma and that those feelings are still open to romantic potential. 

But if you follow me, this is why up until Can’t an Idol Fall in Love With Another Idol’s release, I was terrified of them writing that off. I would have been ok if it was just an arc that was given attention then continued to actively work in the background, as all the character arcs have been over all of Dolce’s content. The fact that they might be giving Fuuma a love interest and giving Fuuma a love arc while Kazuki’s feelings were still up in the air and were still the primary highlighted narrative for him would have been fucking scuffed. To me, it would be like… why would they make him so Fuuma-centric to the point that even his dedicated chapter was not just focused on Fuuma but focused on the ambiguity and potential of him having romantic feelings for Fuuma, yet reduce him to being Fuuma's designated right-hand man. Don’t get me wrong, friendships are just as important as romantic relationships. But again, rather than conclude Kazuki’s answer in Suki to be that his feelings were of friendship, they left it open ended and allow audience members to be actively aware that Kazuki’s feelings towards Fuuma still had potential to be romantically coded. It would just be so weird to quickly close off that narrative by giving Fuuma a love interest as opposed to letting Kazuki conclude it himself. It would be fucking beyond frustrating for me, at least Eventually, I kept trying to drive my hopes that they would explore Kazuki’s narrative at all down to the ground because it was a Fuuma-centric novel; maybe if anything they’d explore those feelings in his own novel after the fact. But then they kept having little drops here and there of Kazuki being even the slightest bit relevant and I’d go back to questioning “Are??? They??? Is this on purpose??? Do they know what they’re doing or are they just doing this because Kazuki’s just so important to Fuuma as his best friend that he’s there as his right-hand I genuinely can’t tell???” And um. Welp.

Safe to say Can’t An Idol Fall in Love sold me on the fact that they know what they’re doing LOL. And to anyone who thinks that Kazuki’s feelings can still be read as ambiguous in CAIFILWAI as opposed to explicitly romantic - whether it be due to a fear they may pull the “I like him as a friend” card or due to the disbelief that they have an explicit mlm main character in the Honeyworks series - I’d like to cover any bases that may make you think this way. If you think it’s just Kazuki acting like a protective friend, why do you think he calls Yui a rival? If you’ve only seen the MV and think it’s ambiguous or can be taken as the "likfe" for friend, then does that mean you think Yui’s feelings toward Fuuma are also ambiguous or as a friend? With the way Yui responds, she is trying to rival Kazuki’s feelings towards Fuuma. She and Kazuki recognize whatever feeling it is that they hold towards Fuuma, both of their feelings are the same type. I don’t think most people would argue that Yui’s confession about Fuuma was one of pure respect and friendship. Plus, if anything I’d argue of the three characters in the MV, Fuuma is the one whose feelings are left the most ambiguous despite him being the central character. It’s heavily implied that he may be forming feelings for Yui, but nowhere is it established either in the song or in the MV, especially if you compare it to Kazuki and Yui’s declarations or if you compare it to Sara’s feelings for Uru in Can’t An Idol Fall in Love. Fuuma’s romantic narrative here is trying to figure out how he feels for Yui, while for Kazuki and Yui they’ve established a rivalry because they both have mutually established they like Fuuma romantically.

If the MV isn’t enough for you and Suki isn’t enough for you for...some reason…??? You can check out the snippets of the light novel which the wonderful takanenene translated: one which revisits the conflict set up in Suki and one that covers the confession scene in the MV in more detail. If the fact that the conflict set up in Suki (aka the lurking feeling of not knowing if all he felt for Fuuma was only platonic or more than platonic) was specifically reestablished in the LN for anyone who didn’t keep up with Dolce Diary didn’t tip you off that it was something important, his behavior in the confession scene as depicted by the LN definitely should have. He’s possessive about his spot by Fuuma’s side. He doesn’t want that spot to be taken by anyone else. Even if he knows that they can help Fuuma, he wants it to be him. And this line: “Kazuki then trails off his words, quietly saying ‘That’s why…’ and then gave Yui a slightly painful smile, his cheeks turning red,” before he declares Yui a rival and states he likes Fuuma. If you can tell me you read that line and are still on the fence about Kazuki’s “like” towards Fuuma being romantic, please message me and I will see how I can get through to you. Like it wasn’t even just a romantically coded confession. It’s just a romantic confession. That “like” is romantic. And I’m so proud that he’s not only come to understand for himself how he feels, but that he’s confident enough to ask the person he sees as a romantic rival to speak in private and not only clarify her feelings for Fuuma but before she can even do that firmly establishes that he loves Fuuma with conviction. Kazuki my boy I’m so proud of you. *sniffs*

And that’s it for establishing Kazufuuma as at least canonically one-sidedly canon and why there’s not only no reason to deny it but also why denying it is a fucking disrespectful move towards Kazuki. He’s a character, sure, but that doesn’t change the fact you shouldn’t write off his struggle to come to be convicted enough to say it out loud. This has been something weighing on him at least a year, if not more (all I know is it started when both he and Fuuma were in some year in middle school). And as a character in a piece of media, I’ve been saying this the entire time, but brushing it off as non-romantic is literally chucking a fucking pillar of his character’s story into the gutter. And to those who may be saying Kazuki’s confession came out of nowhere and is pandering reread this entire fucking essay again I dare you to do it and tell me to my face it’s pandering. Again. Writing off the buildup as pandering is disrespectful to him, disrespectful to his character and narrative, and disrespectful to the wonderful people who have been creating Dolce so diligently and have crafted this narrative for us. Saying his “supposed feelings” and “ambiguous confession” is pandering is like saying Fuuma’s crossdressing is pandering which. If you say either of those I will find you and I will shank you in the fucking gut. Even if you’re not fully into Dolce, recognize these characters are actually very well developed and executed amazingly, as per every Honeyworks character that has come to exist. I don’t blame you if you weren’t aware of the weight of Kazufuuma, but now that you read this I hope you are. That’s mainly what I needed to get out there, but as follows will be me more exploring how Kazufuuma has been built up and generally waving my hand off at where it may be going. If you want you can dip, thanks for reading up to here because I know I repeated a lot because it’s just. So important to drill into your head and has been something I’ve been hung up about constantly. LOL

As for where exactly they’re taking it from this point on, I honestly don’t know. In all honesty, I didn’t even expect them to take it the direction they did. But honestly, I think the direction they went with it is really interesting and better than I could have imagined, in my opinion at least. Honeyworks never ceases to amaze me with their storytelling and narrative choices, and I don’t think there’s any that stand out to me as being severely questionable that they haven’t reapproached at some point down the line. And, again, I think they’re treating this with a lot of care and deserved respect. So I’m just gonna be gushing about how smart they set it up and how smart they’ve been executing it and maybe my own hopes on the direction it could go.

Whether they make Kazufuuma reciprocated I have no real clue or bearings, but to me my gut reaction is they will. Of course, I’m biased, but again if you trace things all the way back to 2018 and step through Dolce’s content and growth from there, I’d say even if they didn’t know if they could execute it like this and see it to fruition, I’d argue that Kazufuuma has been at least heavily implied since the beginning as a relationship they wanted to explore from both sides of the relationship. Obviously I brought up Kazuki’s character bio already, but if you look at the *goes to count* 5th Dolce Diary update already has a joke jabbing at the fact that Kazuki is technically Fuuma’s type (and the way Kippei and Kazuki excitedly react is so cute). The fifth update. And as stated before there are tons of Kazufuuma moments in Dolce Diary, whether it’s played for comedic effect or played straight (and this is post Suki but oh my god I’ve said it before I’ll say it again get yourself someone who looks at you the way Kazuki looks at Fuuma oh my jesus). But song-wise, I mentioned the one Dolce album song I would bring up is Nade Nade and this is where it comes! 

Not only is Nade Nade specifically focused on Kazuki and Fuuma’s relationship as opposed to the whole of Dolce despite being the first song, it included the setup/preview of the Fuuma-centric extra prior to the full release of the Fuuma-centric extra itself and was released early as fuck. Literally between the 6th and 7th update to Dolce Diary. Sure, it could be to isolate them as a duo for marketing purposes (they’re very often the two promoted idols together if the whole of the group aren’t included), but the way it’s established as a perspective song as opposed to a general idol duet is what fascinates me. Anyone who didn’t know about Dolce prior and only followed Honeyworks for music would be first introduced to these characters through this song alone, and maybe this is where my Kazufuuma bias comes from but I was one of those people LOL. I thought it was just a cute one-off relationship that they had set up for the purpose of a song and that it was an implied friends-to-lovers story that would never get a conclusion. Also I mistakenly thought Fuuma was a girl oop-. In the full context of Dolce, this song in part helped establish Fuuma and Kazuki more solidly as a unique duo out of all of Dolce, but it also specifically explored through Fuuma’s eyes just how much Fuuma recognizes and appreciates the unwavering support Kazuki gives him to follow his dreams as he wishes. For Fuuma, he loves Kazuki too, though whether it holds any romantic potential in the same way Kazuki loves him has never been explored to nearly the same extent. But Fuuma appreciates how Kazuki’s remained by his side and does everything he can to support him, so Nade Nade explores how his way of expressing his love and thankfulness to Kazuki is by never saying that he needs Kazuki by his side. He’s glad Kazuki’s always been there for him, and his reciprocation takes on the form of being ready to unwaveringly support Kazuki and not ask for more than he already has, even if it meant Kazuki would be leaving his side, despite the fact that he really does wish they could remain together forever just as Kazuki does. The one point he lets himself say something vaguely close to always wanting to stay together, he gets a surprised expression out of Kazuki and says an ambiguous “suki dayo.” Of course, this it much less romantically coded than what we get from Kazuki in Suki and CAIFILWAI, but there is an interesting emphasis put on it nonetheless. Keep in mind, this is all established through the song, which released long before not only Fuuma’s character-centric extra released but also Kazuki’s character-centric extra released, so there is at least a substantial setup for Fuuma’s feelings towards Kazuki’s being strong as well and possibly grow to be reciprocated one day.

I think for me the most fascinating part about Nade Nade is how they tied it back around to Can’t An Idol Fall In Love with Another Idol. Again, without remembering Nade Nade, I still thought CAIFILWAI was brilliantly explored and executed, even if some people would have preferred no love triangle. But honestly, revisiting Nade Nade makes me trust even more the direction they’re taking with this. Whether or not they make Kazufuuma canon mutually (which. Even if they for some inexplicable reason didn’t I’m going down with this ship.), I’m sure they’re putting a lot of thought into the story, because the last bit of Nade Nade directly parallels the misunderstanding that arose from Fuuma mishearing the Kazuki and Yui. Fuuma is resolved to support Kazuki in any area he’s given the chance, and that explicitly includes if Kazuki had some girl he liked, which is what he assumes is going on. The fact that they tied this back around in the form of a misunderstanding was really really smart and Honeyworks is always so good at parallels and references back to their older songs, but for some reason I didn’t expect this. I don’t know how to say why, but the fact that the song that started it all, kicked off both Dolce and Kazufuuma, was directly referenced both visually in the MV with a cameo at the start and narratively despite the central dynamic being predominantly explored in this story in particular was that of Fuuma and another potential love interest and involves said potential love interest for some reason makes me think that (sorry Yui) this is all planned out for Kazufuuma in the grand scheme of things. That being said, I don’t know if me thinking it was planned all along is just me with shipper goggles, but the idea it’s come full circle nearly 3 years later is not shipper goggles and a very very well done parallel in my opinion, whether this trajectory was their plan for Kazufuuma from the beginning or not. Just wanted to gush about that some more. 

There’s more I could go into especially if I went into specific details about interactions or specific implications established in Honeyworks' Dolce content about different characters that would be fascinating to explore in relation to and under the lens of Kazufuuma, but I think this is uh...plenty long enough. Plus, I doubt you'll stop seeing Kazufuuma posts from me so those ideas will probably just be miniposts or somethin.

Back to the overarching point of this segment, idk what they’ll do with this story in the end, but do I think Kazufuuma will canon? I’m used to looking at ships that aren’t explicitly apparent with a sliver of skepticism, but all things considered (as I stated before) yeah. I don’t see reason why they wouldn’t now that they’ve explicitly identified there is a romantic dimension to it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Like to me, the setup isn’t something that would be written off as unrequited? And this doesn’t have to play into why I don’t think it will canon, my personal opinion on the Fuuyui relationship (again albeit through the lens of a hard Kazufuuma shipper lmao) has it’s own merits and is really cute, I find it cute in the way I found Koyuhina cute. I personally never really shipped Koyuhina, and especially since they slipped Kotarou into Ima Suki Ni Naru I was more curious about who this kid was and how he played into things I didn’t really see Koyuhina as something that would come to fruition. Similarly, there’s more importance in the overall sense on Kazuki than there is Yui (considering he’s one of the 5 original and focal members of this generation of idols, this would be natural), as well as the fact there’s just way more foundation and exploration in Fuuma and Kazuki’s relationship than there is Fuuma and Yui. As for how much of a balance there is inside the LN itself, the fact that they seem to have spent a substantial amount relaying the foundation of Fuuma and Kazuki’s relationship and re-exploring it (at least in Kazuki’s perspective) at all on top of how much content there is covering their relationship prior to the LN ever since Dolce’s origin just feels like that relationship holds more weight. Pretty much Kazufuuma feels more established as a priority in general. The way I personally hope Fuuyui plays out is whether they wind up holding mutual feelings or not or whether Fuuma doesn’t feel that way towards Yui is they get a relationship akin to Kotarou and Arisa. Albeit, Kotarou and Arisa never viewed each other in a romantic light, but they had mutual respect and solidarity. That’s the type of friendship I hope comes out of Fuyui. And considering there hasn’t been a break-up in any Honeyworks’ canon relationships (nor do I expect there to be… they’re all perfect for each other LMAO) it would actually be interesting if Fuuyui get together but don’t endgame and Kazufuuma is established as the inseparable endgame after some realization or another, though I don’t expect them to go that route nor do I know if that’d be the best way to go about it anyway. Also final point, Honeyworks seems to have a thing for childhood friends trope anyway soooooo owo All in all, don’t know where they’re taking it, just excited to see where it goes. 

TL;DR of this *counts* 7 page essay, stan Kazufuuma. Not gonna proof this. Maybe I’ll edit and repost but yall are getting a confusing clusterfuck of ramblings over 2-3 hr periods of me writing across 3 different days at around 5am each day. Uh. If you got this far like and subscribe and-- jk plz reply to this mammoth anywhere you see fit or tell me if you have stuffs to add or counter or whatnot I like hearing people talk about Kazufuuma ;w; I am Kazuki and Kazufuuma brainrot can you tell after reading this? No? Lemme just remind you I’m K--

[maoam]

Okay so I want to make couple things clear. Let me start this by saying I’ve been in this fandom for literal years and seen all kinds of stuff from “Sasuke shouldn’t breed because eugenics” to “Sasuke doesn’t even deserve Naruto” to “Naruto would sexually assault Sasuke” to “Sasuke would sexually assault Naruto” to “people talk too much about Sasuke’s suffering” to god knows what else that has made me dislike sns fandom and be wary of it.

I also don’t personally think Sasuke is “female coded” it’s more about homoeroticism if anything, but it does say something if a whole bunch of people who aren’t women (including one of the directors of the anime) think he’s heroine-like or should have been a female character. I, however, understand what people mean when they say it, because it’s not common for example to see a male character sexualized in a way Sasuke is, that usually happens to female characters. That obviously doesn’t make him a woman or fragile or erase the fact he does cool things or is aggressive or vengeful sometimes and isn’t “girly” at all.

The way I ship Naruto and Sasuke is probably the least problematic thing ever, I’m protective of Sasuke and don’t want any non-con/dub-con (I won’t attack people for it, I just avoid it), hell I prefer reading fluff or angst. Me pointing out the sexualization of Sasuke is literally just being honest. People used to be more honest about it, I remember even men on forum were mocking how other shonen sexualize women but Naruto is just yaoi fanservice and sexualizes Sasuke when the manga was still going. And I have seen even people who aren’t in the Naruto fandom to notice it just based on panels. Because it really is that obvious (to people who aren’t in denial that is).

I don’t know about that because I have never talked about that issue or reblogged anything about it. But I have seen plenty of posts equating Naruto to shojo protagonist and Sasuke to his bad boy, and how Naruto is more “feminine” and Sasuke is “more traditionally masculine” because Naruto cries or whatever. And looking at the blogs they are serious about it, but of course most people don’t have a problem with that.

Nah I don’t think I will. I think pressing against someone with your naked body is weird as hell, not even including all the innuendo with that whole encounter. Not that kind of “harassment” but you know, drawn suggestively. And yes Karin flirted with Sasuke but she was also couple times creepy (not to him directly). And Kishi obviously didn’t have to draw any of this. In op stuff like this happens to usually Nami. And then right after we have Karin coming on Sasuke’s skin. This whole particular volume was full of Sasuke fanservice, starting from that suggestive chapter cover, jutsu with Sai and not even ending there. Oh and I forgot Oro and Kabuto and Obito from my list. They all act weird with Sasuke and want to kidnap and possess him. Oro calls Sasuke’s face and body beautiful, Kabuto says he wants a “fragile” Uchiha and wants Sasuke to stay by his side forever. Like is anyone seriously not seeing this.

Seriously calling me “puritan” over this?

That being said, I don’t ship Sasuke with any of these people, I only ship him with Naruto, in a consensual relationship. But I’m not gonna pretend I don’t see what’s there.

The latter: the only tweet I have seen about that was the tweet mocking the claim Sakura married him for his money, I have not seen the original tweet (and I don’t remember what that ask was or whether the anon had seen it). I stay far away from Naruto twitter for the exact reason that everyone is crazy there (though it is anime fandoms in general).

Jesus... the misogyny is referring to people who say if you don’t like Sakura and like Sasuke you’re a misogynist, not whatever post op has made about Sakura being written misogynistically. I’m sick of female character stans always pulling the misogyny card if someone doesn’t care much about a female character who is not written well. Sakura would be the easiest to ignore considering Sasuke ignores her as well if her stans didn’t constantly act like Sasuke ruined her life. Not to mention I’m always ready to defend her from things like people saying she’s an asshole for not being interested in Lee or turning him down or people acting like Hinata is much better than her because she simped the right guy. But people acting like they’re feminists for treating Sakura as the biggest victim in the story is just..... too much.

If op doesn’t act like the aforementioned people then we’re cool, none of these were an attack on them as a person. Just towards the hypocrisy in sns fandom as well as the ridiculous claims by Sakura stans. I’m tired honestly. I’m not going to pretend I haven’t seen the same stuff for years and years.

[xplrvibes]

Sprung | Sam and Colby Story

Title: Sprung

Summary: They had never been torn apart like that before.  Nobody had ever dared try it. 

Pairing: None 

Warnings: Sam and Colby’s arrest rehashed, brief talk of the jail system, mentions of anxiety 

Author’s Note: This is based on an ask someone sent me last night, about how Sam being one who bottles his emotions up until they explode in these sweeping declarations of love and tears.  Also, since it’s the jailaversary, and I always wanted to hear more about that saga from Sam’s POV, I just went ahead and did...this. I’m not a writer, so don’t judge me too harshly-but I’d love to know if you liked!

A/N 2: Now on AO3!

***

Sam has never seen a better sight than a disheveled, tired Colby Brock waiting for him outside of the police station.

The preceding 14 hours since Sam had last watched Colby disappear behind an ominous steel door with a painful smirk forced across his face and a tremor in his handcuffed hands had been some of the worst he had ever experienced in his life.  He had stood outside the police station in the muggy Florida air with no cell phone, no car, no idea of where he was or how to get to where he needed to be.

No Colby at his side.

They had never been torn apart like that before.  Nobody had ever dared try it.  Sam felt like a piece of him had been taken; a fundamental piece, like his liver or some shit.  He felt wrong in his skin without Colby by his side; especially knowing where he had left him, and that all of the responsibility of getting him out of there rested on his shoulders.

To say Sam was stressed, would be an understatement.

But Sam was nothing if not determined, and he made it work.  He sucked in a breath, steeled his spine, and made his way to a gas station pay phone to call the Irelands.

He had work to do.

***

Fourteen hours and multiple phone calls to worried parents and terrified friends and one extremely exasperated lawyer (”On a construction site in Florida? Sam...”) and management team later, Sam was finally told that Colby’s bail had been posted and he was being released.  Sam could go and get him.

He was never planning on letting anyone separate them like that again.

“Hey,” Colby muttered as Sam walked up to where he sat with a couple of fans outside the doors to the precinct, bail paperwork and a bag of his possessions in his shaking hand.  He looked distinctly un-Colby like at the moment; rattled, definitely and it showed.  He was pale, his hair was in a state of disarray, his Justin Bieber shirt-and God, who else but Colby would go to jail in a Justin Bieber fit?-was wrinkled and stretched at the collar.  He had a smile plastered to his face, but his eyes were shining bright with barely concealed anxiety.  He wanted out of this place, asap.

Sam let out the breath he had been holding since Colby had first been walked away from him by those damn guards.  He felt the missing piece of his soul settle back in to place.  His world realigned itself. 

Colby was back with him.

“Hey,” he responded back, and held out a hand to take Colby’s possession bag for him.  “Ready to head out?”

“Totally.”

***

After saying goodbye and taking a photo with the fans who had waited outside the police station with Colby, they got back in the rental car that Sam had gone to pick up from the abandoned school a few hours earlier and headed back towards the hotel.

“So, the fans said that everyone knows?” Colby asked quietly from the passenger seat.  His ring-less hands were flexing in his lap.  His voice was shaking.

Sam gripped the steering wheel a little tighter and cleared his throat.  “Um, yea,” he responded slowly.  “Yea, they found out and made it trend on twitter for like, a whole day.  Number one trending topic,” he added.

Colby whistled.  “Shit.”  He reached up to play with his earring-a nervous habit he had developed since getting his ears pierced the year prior-and winced when he realized the earring was no longer there.  His hand fell back to his lap, trembling.

“Yea,” Sam replied.  “By the time I got out last night, word was already everywhere.”  He swallowed and briefly glanced over at Colby.  “Our parents already knew.”

Colby glanced back.  “Did you talk to them?” He whispered.

Sam nodded.  “I talked to your mom, too.  Told her I wasn’t gonna let you rot in a jail cell.  She made me promise to get you out,” he smiled.  Colby didn’t smile back. “Dude, she’s ok, I promise.  Just worried about you.”

“She’s not mad?” Colby asked in a small voice.

“I mean, probably, but...” Sam shrugged.  Colby said nothing else.  What else was there to say?

The rest of the drive was in silence.

***

Although Sam had stayed with the Irelands while working tirelessly on getting Colby back, he didn’t think Colby would be up to going there and seeing everyone right now.  So, he took them back to their original hotel, which had thankfully been paid up for another day before the arrest.

Colby hadn’t questioned it.  He walked into their room and looked around at the mess they had left behind 30 hours prior before dropping his jail paperwork in a heap on the hotel table and heading over to his bed.  He slumped down on the bed with a tired sigh, turning to lean himself against the headboard and drawing his knees up in front of him. 

Sam sighed, and came to sit down next to Colby.  He bumped his shoulder into Colby’s in solidarity, and Colby huffed and leaned his head onto Sam’s shoulder.

The silence stretched out between them for a moment, comfortable and sure.  They didn’t need words.  They both always just knew.  It was a thing that their friends and even family would tease them for sometimes, their ability to just sit and be together, with no words, and draw some kind of silent strength from one another.  They didn’t care what anyone had to say about it, really.  It gave them both peace and reassurance, and that was what mattered.

“What do we do now?” Colby asked after a moment, exhaustion threaded in his voice.

Sam shifted slightly, and bumped his knee again Colby’s.  “Our lawyer’s working on it,” he replied quietly.  “She yelled at me for a while, but she’s gonna make it so we can go back home until the court date.”

“Oh, good,” Colby responded.  “Cause like, I don’t wanna be here anymore.”

Sam reached out a hand, and clasped Colby’s shaking one in his.  “You’re ok, though...right?” He asked in a quiet voice.

Colby nodded.  “Just like, it was scary, you know?” He responded.  “I didn’t like being alone, and everyone in there was nice to me and shit, but...”

Sam smiled.  Trust Colby to declare that everyone he shared jail space with was nice.  

“Dude, you are never allowed to go to jail without me again,” Sam declared, squeezing Colby’s hand.

Colby squeezed back.  “Don’t pay your bail next time, and join me,” he responded.  

He was joking, Sam knew, but he felt the panic and fear and guilt of the last 14 hours bubble up his throat anyway, and tears began to prick at his eyes. “Dude,” he gasped, “I’m never going to let anyone separate us like that ever again.”

Colby lifted his head to look in Sam’s eyes.  “I know, brother,” he replied slowly.

Sam shook his head.  The tears were brimming now, he could feel it.  The dam was bursting.  “No,” he sniffled, “Like, they walked you into the back and I saw how scared you were, brother, like I felt it and there was nothing I could do about it!  And then I had to go out there, alone, and leave you there!  Like, I never wanted that-”

“I know, Sam-”

“-Like, leaving you behind, or losing you, is my worst nightmare, dude!  Like, I can’t do it again, I don’t ever want anyone to do that to us again-”

“-Sam, they won’t-”

“-And like, I just love you so much, brother, you know that, right?”  Sam’s mini-tirade ended on a sob, as Sam turned and pulled Colby into his arms.  He didn’t hug Colby near enough, or articulate into words how much he loved him.  It wasn’t Sam’s style; he was never good with outward displays of emotions.  Of the two of them, Colby was always the one who wore his heart on his sleeve, and did so effortlessly.  Sam struggled with displays of affection and emotion.

He knew, in his more rational moments, that Colby knew him better than anyone else on the planet.  That Colby understand how much he meant to Sam, that Colby knew how much Sam loved him.  That words weren’t needed between them; that his actions were felt and deciphered and understood. 

But sometimes, it all just came bubbling out, spilling all over the place like a volcano.  When Sam got emotional, he went all in with said emotion, and Colby understood that, too.

Colby understood everything, when it came to Sam.

“I know, Sam,” Colby responded, arms wrapped tightly around Sam’s shoulders.  Sam turned his head into Colby’s neck and breathed deep.  He smelled like sweat, and jail, and fear...but underneath all of that was the distinctive smell of Colby Brock.  The smell Sam had come to associate with home, many years ago.

“They’ll never take you away from me again,” Sam whispered, and Colby chuckled.

“I’d like to see ‘em try,” He responded.

[zwowow]

can you do what happens after non famous!kells and eminem get outed? like they go to an award show together for the first time and they’re the center of attention or something like that?

a post-getting outed kells rockin the red carpet? say less y’all (ft. some “this is a little much” at the end as per #3′s request) (part 1)

On the ride to the venue, Kells starts to grip his hand tighter and tighter as they get closer to the venue. Or maybe he’s the one gripping Kells. Either way, Em’s fingers throb in time with his racing heart. 

They’re going to their first red carpet tonight, for an award show Em gets nominated at every year but hasn’t won in five. Not that he cares. Shit, it’s just another reason to stay the fuck home. 

He wouldn’t go this year, would just skip it like he does every other year, but this isn’t every other year. He got outed this year. He got exposed for having a boyfriend and now Kells is stuck going to an award show with him and walking the red carpet for the first time. Even though he never comes, if he skips the show tonight, people will accuse him of hiding. He couldn’t give a fuck about what people think usually, but again. It’s different, now. He’s got nothing to hide anymore, and apparently he needs to show it. 

Once their feet touch the red carpet, Em sees a switch go on in Kells. He stops gripping Em’s hand like a vise. His back straightens and he grins lazily toward any and all cameras. He holds his head up while they walk down the aisle and keeps his mouth shut. Em catches him winking and giggling at a few photographers and wonders what they said to make him wink and laugh like that, he’s about to ask Kells but Kells stops him before he can with a grin. 

“It was nothing. Just saying I’m hot as shit. Nothing new.” Em would be jealous, but he doesn’t have the opportunity, not with Kells practically stuck to his side. When it comes time to pose, Kells presses a hand into his back, or snakes it around his waist. He doesn’t need direction, only an audience. And he captivates them all. Even Em is dazzled. 

For his part, Em just stands there. He lets Kells shine and smile and pose and laugh and bite his lip and yell “Versace” when someone asks what he’s wearing. He tries not to frown or flinch away from the constant camera flash. He links fingers with Kells and blushes when he raises their interwoven hands and kisses his knuckles. He tries to focus on the coos and ahhs from people dazzled by their coupling instead of the obvious goads from a few paps that are obviously unafraid of having their press passes revoked. Really, he just fucking stands there. 

Kells’ charm doesn’t turn off once they’re sitting in their seats, either. He greets all the famous people around him with an eagerness and earnest Em hasn’t witnessed in years. It’s refreshing, especially to someone as jaded to these things as he is. Men talk to Kells like an old friend and the women blush like they’re being flirted with. Nobody ignores Em, but Kells draws the attention off of him easily. He goes between being grateful for that, and a little possessive over Kells’ attention. He is his date, after all. 

When Em’s category comes up, and Kells knows they’re on screen, he again grabs Em’s hand in his. Em can’t tell if he’s going it for himself, for Em, or for the cameras. It doesn’t matter though, does it? 

For the first time in half a decade, Em wins his category. It could be for publicity, to give the award to the person with the craziest past few months so that he can go up and give a speech about said crazy months. But that also doesn’t matter. 

Because when Kells hears his name, he jumps up from his seat faster than Em can. He swings his arms around Em’s shoulders and hauls him in for a kiss before Em’s even really processed that he won. Em almost turns away at the last second, so used to hiding himself and their kisses that this feels way too public, but he doesn’t. 

“So fucking proud of you.” Kells whispers in his ear when he pulls back. Em doesn’t say anything back right away, just walks on stage to collect his award. He thanks his team, the voters, Paul, Dre, the entire city of Detroit because why the fuck not, and when he’s done with all of them, Em locks eyes with Kells in the second row. 

“Kells. Thank you. It’s uh, it’s been crazy...” Three words that he’s said in private thousands of times dry up in Em’s throat. But one look back at Kells and his proud grin is all the water he needs. “And I just wanna say that I love you, and, you know, thanks for being here with me.”

When he gets back to his seat, Kells places a hand on his thigh and purrs into his ear, “I’m gonna suck you bone fuckin’ dry on the way back.” Em doesn’t remember a single thing from the rest of the show, but he remembers every second of the ride back. Even with the partition raised, the driver definitely got a show. 

“My fucking twitter is blowin’ up right now.” Kells hasn’t put down his phone since the minute he checked it when they got back. There were people all over him when the news of them first broke, but it had been quieting down, now started anew because of the award show. 

“It’s gonna be like that from now on.” He’d told Kells what it would be like as much as possible, but nothing can truly prepare you for the onslaught of attention being in the spotlight can bring. 

“Fuuuuck.” Kells puts down his phone and rubs his eyes with his palms. He looks tired, way more exhausted than he had when they’d left the ceremony.

“You good?” Em takes a seat next to where Kells is laying on the bed. 

Kells peaks at him from between his fingers, ���Between fucking twitter and all those fucking cameras earlier, imma have permanent lights behind my eyes.” 

“Probably.” Em smiles and brushes hair from Kells’ forehead lightly. 

Frowning, Kells looks up at him, “So this shit never gets easy, huh?”

Em thinks about the last twenty years. The game has changed, yes; there are different rules and different players and ups and downs, but fame has stayed the same. 

“Nah, but there are people you can keep around you that make it feel better.” An exhausted smile spreads across Kells’ face when Em says that. 

“Told you I would make great arm candy.” 

“Yeah,” He says, and pets Kells’ forehead some more, watching his eyes blink slowly open and shut, “You did.”