#no matter how far he and kaneki drift

[rehide]

the thing about hide is that he never once expressed visible hurt abt kaneki not telling him he's a ghoul. it was never a topic of discussion between them, not even in re when it's a much safer conversation to have. he never (at least openly) feels betrayed about it, and still uses his every action to get closer to kaneki and the ghoul world despite how cut off he's been from kaneki's life. and i'm sure hide was smart enough to realize that kaneki's avoidance was always about protecting him, but it's hard to imagine that he wasn't at least a little hurt at some point that kaneki wouldn't tell him. and then a couple hundred chapters later kaneki's stumbling over his words in a sewer and hide's telling him how he's always known, while offering up his own life for his.

[harleyquilt]

Unfinished Business

Summary: An EtoKen fic with reaper!Kaneki having a surprised visit of an old acquaintance during a vulnerable moment. 

Words: 3155

Notes: For the birthday boy @dreamofcentipedes!! I mean let’s just ignore the fact that I had no intention to write this before, since I even included your favourite boy in this. If you hate it, remember to disown me, because honesty is important. Hope you have a great day~

Kaneki tightened his black trench coat around him, breathing into his cold hands with his eyes glaring down the dark streets of Tokyo. He wasn't unfamiliar to the feeling of being watched, his narrowed eyes slowly moving to every turnoff and corner. Ever since that unexpected encounter with that Aogiri witch, he kept up this paranoid caution that left him on edge on tranquil nights like these. He couldn't let his guard down again - not when he was so close to cutting off her head. Though she may just cut off his before he got a chance.

“You really like brooding, don't you? You can just go home now.” Ui pulled on his own coat as he headed out the CCG building, glancing at the black reaper up and down. “No need to keep up the act, they're already labelling you with that awful nickname.” Taking out a cigarette, he watched Haise, his body still as he continued to stare at the empty city. “I'm surprised they didn't just call you Arima’s whelp.”

Haise sighed, finally looking back with those empty eyes of his. He looked exhausted, Ui thought to himself whilst lighting his cigarette, examining the dark shadows that hung beneath Haise’s eyes and the constant frown that was carved onto his face. Furuta mentioned something about how the associate special class would stay up till early hours doing his own kind of investigation. In a way, Ui admired such dedication, but there was something unsettling with all this; he wasn't anything like how he was before the Rose mission, his demeanor now cold and cut off. He had become less a protector for the people and more a reaper seeking to satisfy his own independent needs. With him only wandering further away from what he once was, to hear him work on his own investigation only seemed worryingly suspicious. As much as he hated to admit it, he much preferred the old Haise, even if he was still too dangerous back then.

“Something on your mind, special class?” Haise’s voice was low and quiet, his brow raised. Ui breathed out some smoke, keeping still. “It seems you don't like me much.”

“Of course I don't, just look at you.” Haise showed no reaction, besides shoving his hands into his pocket. “You're too dangerous. I see little reason to keep around an unleashed weapon that could be used against us at any second.”

Haise stared for a moment before that creepy grin tugged at the end of his lips. He only shrugged and leaned down to take his case and with a small bow, he made his way down one street before disappearing around the corner. Shaking his head, Ui grabbed his own case and went down the opposite way, trying to forget the unnerving smile his coworker responded with. He was at least thankful he didn’t have to work with him directly.

Eto tapped her finger against her chin, humming to herself as her legs swung over the ledge of the building she sat on. She watched with some amusement as the two investigators went their separate ways, though she was of course keeping her focus on her dear friend Ken Kaneki. He had indeed changed drastically since their little meeting, with his little happy dream now shattered. It was so entertaining to see him so honest, though she was sure she could drag more of his beautiful character out of him. He’ll be her little experiment, her protege for greatness with the King’s help. He’ll be perfection in the most beautifully corrupt way only he could be. With a sly chuckle, she stood up and skipped off, pulling the loose bandages off her body. What wonderful ideas she was starting to have.

. . .

“I must say, you seem quite...infatuated with our little rat we’re trying to catch.” Furuta mused, leaning back in his chair whilst twirling it around. Haise looked up with a bemused glare, his jaw clenched. This damned clown… “Oh, I hope I didn’t offend you, I was simply saying my thoughts aloud.”

“Perhaps it would be better if those thoughts were left unheard then.” Furuta only laughed at his response. His mocking smile only agitated Haise further. “Now now, don’t be like that.” Furuta continued, stilling his chair and leaning forward to rest his head on his hand. “After all, you’re the one spending night and day trying to find her. Some may just think you’re in love.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“I know that already.” Haise sneered at his chuckles, an exasperated sigh leaving him as he stood up to get some coffee. “But don’t you think the same could be said of you, hm? You didn’t deny it after all. Then again,” he kept his eyes on Haise as he spoke his next words slowly, “there’s always that pretty manager I know you can’t stop thinking of.”

Haise stilled, his cup slipping out of his hands. He turned back, eyes dark and filled to the brim with rage. How scary. Furuta, with his pretend shock, apologised for pushing his boss too far and tried to brush it aside by offering his own coffee. Most of time, there’d only be an empty, absent minded look in those dark eyes of his, but it always fun eliciting the raw emotions he tried so hard to hide sometimes - that passionate hate, that sneering disgust, the loud pain he used as fuel for this final investigation of his. He tried so hard to hide all this, but he was simply too honest, especially with just a single word reminding him of the world he was trying to cut himself from. Of course, Furuta shouldn’t toy with him too much; no no, they still needed each other before he was allowed to break. It was a shame, considering how fun it was.

The day passed on quietly after that moment, yet Kaneki still felt shaken from Furuta’s mention of Touka. Damn it! He didn’t want to think about her - not now. Every time he thought of her, all those emotions of guilt and pain would bombard him violently. There’d be that voice that told him to stop, to return to her despite the plans he had set out for himself. His heart yearned for her even now, no matter how hard he tried to push it back. Fuck, it hurt. It hurt so much. He had to focus, though. He couldn’t let his mind become clouded with every reminder - he had a plan after all and he couldn’t let Touka be his undoing. Focus…

“Well, my moody boss, I’m off.” Furuta dumped a thick folder of paperwork onto Haise’s desk, his smug grin forever there to mock him. “I would ask if you wanted to get drinks with me, but I’m afraid you’d just scare off the other customers.”

“Can’t have that now, can we?” Haise checked the time and decided that perhaps it’d be better if he continued his work back at his apartment. He had barely gotten anything done with his cluttered mind too busy trying to forget everything.

Once Furuta left, Kaneki leaned back in his seat, shutting his eyes and taking in a deep breath, relishing this quiet moment for himself. Everything seemed like an utter mess. After spending so many months trying to create the perfect plan to save both Hinami and himself from their despair, he was starting to tumble. He wanted to see people he wasn’t supposed to see, he felt things he shouldn’t feel and all the while, his focus was slowly drifting away from his main objective of finding her. Even now, it seemed that Eto was still making his life a living hell. With her being the biggest threat in compromising his perfectly set out plans, he had to capture her and detain her. That slippery woman always seemed to fall away from his grasp though. It was as if she were standing nearby, taunting him at every moment he tried to reach for her.

And then there was Touka.

Kaneki stared up at the ceiling before slowly turning his gaze to the window whilst lost in thought, the view overlooking the night city. Walking over to the window, Kaneki pressed his head against the cold glass as he watched the lit up streets, his eyes roaming to that one particular spot he was more than familiar with. Even with all his effort, it seemed like he really couldn’t stop thinking about her. It was pathetic really. He wondered what she was doing, whether she was thinking of him as she sat with her coffee by her side, staring out just as he was doing now. Well, to be honest he wouldn’t be surprised if she hated him at this point, with him always leaving her...Always hurting her...It wasn’t fair and he knew she wouldn’t see his reasons in the same light as he did. It was probably better that way. If she was able to just forget him with her spite, then he’d at least wouldn’t have to worry about her trying to seek him out again. He could only hope; he knew if she were to seek him out and call his name, just as she used to, he wouldn’t be able to resist his temptations. Yeah, it was better if she just forgot he ever existed and lived her life with content.

He winced at this train of thought and averted his gaze, realising he was going down the same dark spiral as he had done earlier. Focus. He needed to focus. His eyes lifted up and widened quickly at the figure that appeared before him. She stood right on the other side of the pane of glass, the hollow eyes of her bandaged mask staring down at him. Kaneki stepped back, his jaw hung open and eyes bulged. Was this a dream? He must’ve fell asleep, otherwise…

“Oops, did I scare you?” She giggled delightfully, her hands pressed together. “You just looked all sad and lonely up here, I thought I’d keep you compan-”

She wasn’t even able to finish her sentence before Kaneki’s kagune shot right through the glass, right for her head. She leaned away with an excited grin, grabbing his sharp kagune to keep her balanced. He shot out two more, aiming for her legs, but she leaped up and landed smoothly onto them instead, the window shattering into jagged shards. Kaneki had regained his composure, his eyes set on his prey. Pulling his kagune away to swing another attack at her, she leaped off, giving a small wave as she fell.

Following her, he ran off the ledge, using his kagune to push him up and with his eyes locked onto the small minx, Kaneki stretching out the black tentacles towards her. All of this was happening too fast, his mind unable to make sense of any of this, though he only knew that he had seize the opportunity. He’d make Eto regret underestimating him. Landing onto one of the rooftops, she quickly turned and with a sudden swipe of her arm, Kaneki’s kagune was cut off. They pulled back and thrusted forward again with sharpened edges, digging into the ground as Kaneki leaped onto the same building.

“My my, how aggressive.” Eto twirled around, waiting for the young boy to catch his breath. “I don’t think I’ve met a fan more dedicated to meet me than you, my deary.”

The ground cracked around her and her eyes noticed the kagune Kaneki had driven into the ground. “Shut the fuck up.” Kaneki growled and the kagune sprouted from the concrete beneath Eto, a crooked grin appearing on his lips. However, she only jumped above and used the twisting, snake-like tentacles as leverage to leap towards her little rival.

“What rude manners you have.” Her voice was playful and overjoyed and he tried to step back. “Oho, don’t leave just yet, handsome.” Pushing him back, he tripped back on the cracked ground, his head hitting hard against the concrete. “You would think that for someone who was planning to battle with the great death god himself would be little less clumsy. Too slow, dear, too slow.”

He tried to stand, but she used her own kagune to keep his legs in place. “I guess it’s hard to focus when I just appeared like that. Especially with your mind being on other things.” He leaned up onto his elbows, his teeth gritted and pain pulsing across his body from his pierced thighs. “Quite careless of you, though. Besides, I thought you’d be happier. Haven’t you been looking for me all this time?”

“Why are you here?” He asked, glaring. It was probably what confused him the most and with no time to think this all through, his only priority as of now was not letting her defeat and humiliate him further. She only laughed at his bewildered scowl, straddling him as she removed the mask of bandages. She shook her head to free her mess of hair and he could finally see her amused face, her one eye red - just like him. “It’s not like you to just suddenly appear like this.”

“Very true. The fact is that you intrigue me, Ken Kaneki.” Eto pinched his cheek and he grabbed her wrist firmly, pulling it away. “I can’t wait to see what you will become and I’ll be there watching, right at the front row. I’m just rooting for you in my own special way.”

“You’re sick.” She beamed at his empty words, her wild eyes crinkled and she leaned in close, Kaneki making no effort to move back. She wanted more, more of that empty coldness. She was drowning in this greedy want of hers and she was more than willing to indulge it. “I will take you down, no matter the promise I made to your father.”

“Parents are such bothersome things, don’t you think?” She brushed his hair back whilst continuing to ignore his words, her lips brushed against his ear. “They really fucked us up. Ah, how disgustingly similar we are.”

With her guard down and her busy entertaining her little game with him, he grabbed her shoulders, his nails digging into her skin through the thin fabric of her ragged cloak. He pushed her back onto the ground, his kagunes twisting around to pin her down as he wiped the cold sweat from his brow. He had to finish this before her words got to him - he wasn’t about to let her throw a wrench into all his plans. Eto stared with little surprise and he quickly wrapped his hands around her thin neck, though there was no fear in those wicked eyes of hers. She waited, his hold on her tightened and she waited some more.

All he had to do was snap her neck with just a little more pressure. If she were to walk away from this triumphantly after underestimating his capabilities...Yet all the while, he haltered in his actions; if he killed her now, what would that mean of his plans? Should he just drag her crippled body to the CCG? Or would it just be better to save everyone the trouble and just smother her now and speed up his own plans? That gross smile encouraged him, teasing him of his indecisiveness and all the while, he could feel the ghost of Yoshimura watching him. Promises would turn to broken promises and it would only feed his haunting guilt...

“So sentimental.” She sighed eventually, wiggling her body beneath him. “I’m afraid I’m not into this kind of play. Or, well, not with me being the one beneath-” He lifted her head up and slammed it down again, body tense. She flinched only slightly and kept her eyes on him, excited at this mix of emotions she was witnessing. If only she could open that bruised head of his and spool out all his thoughts to watch the turmoil he was going through.

“Why are you here?” He asked again, his voice low and almost a growl. He demanded an answer again, slowly suffocating her. “You’re not even attacking, so why-”

“What would be the fun in that? Like I said- I’m intrigued.” Her voice was becoming tight, yet it remained calm. “If only you could see how beautiful you are, you wouldn’t blame me for wanting to have a little fun.”

Confused, he let his grip loosen and finding her chance, two spikes of her kagune pierced through his shoulders, lifting him up enough for her to slip away. Kaneki was thrown back, a buzzing in his ears with the sudden attack leaving him confounded. She stepped over to where he was writhing on the ground and planted a quick kiss on the corner of his lips, giggling as she patted his head and leaped off into a dark alleyway. With some effort, he pulled himself up and stared down into the place she fell, finding it empty. He scowled, his hands clenched into fists and with his rage, his kagune slammed against the nearby water tank, a loud yell escaping him.

Eto stared from the distance, watching her beloved boy tear himself and everything around him apart for his weaknesses. Tatara stood besides her, watching her interest and amusement peak at her own little show she had interfered with. He lowered his face behind his collar, stepping back slightly so that she wouldn’t see the weak expression he wore in watching her love for Kaneki. Her playful joy never before seemed so apparent.

“May I ask what the point in all that was?” Tatara asked a little too sharply, though she didn’t seem bothered by his tone. “You do realise our final plans need to be set in motion soon.”

“Exactly.” She stood up, shoving past him as she started to head towards their base. “I don’t have much time. I want to indulge my desires a little more before that time runs out. Don’t worry about my judgements, Tatara.” She turned back, a solemn look in her smile. “I just don’t want to have any regrets.”

Tatara bowed, mumbling a small apology. She was still in her own twisted world, forever ruling herself by her fervent emotions that rebelled against the systems of this corrupt world. To see someone so alike to her must excite her in ways he couldn’t understand. He’d just simply continue admiring her from where he was, from the distance where he could never fully comprehend or understand her in the way he would’ve wanted to. Glancing back, he watched the young investigator calm himself as he stared at the city from a high scaffolding, wondering if he could understand him the way Eto did. Probably not. Probably for the better.

Either way, the time will soon come when all their character’s will truly but put to the test.

[linkspooky]

Hi linkspooky, i remember a scene where touka told kaneki she wanted him to look at her the same way he looked at rise, from behind the book he was holding, but i can't remember which chapter did i read that, also i wanted to ask, when did touka actually start to love kaneki romantically for have feelings for him

122: What Time Works for You

That’s a bit of a hard question to place, but I think the most definite point is immediately after the Aogiri arc where we see her holding onto her parent’s wedding ring but speaking about Kaneki instead. Absence makes the heart grow fonder after all.

As for why this moment in particular, besides what I said above thematically a lot of TouKen’s relationship has been defined by the absence of one or the other, and their longing to be together in spite of that. The physical absence of Kaneki is really more of a plot symbol, them being in different locations meaning their inability for their feelings to reach each other, because Touka cannot express her affection, and Kaneki cannot accept that affection in a mature and secure way even if she was able to. 

Yet still, their feelings persevere or even grow stronger no matter how far they tend to drift apart.  

[gorocult]

Pensieve

Hidekane Week 2017 - Day 1: Honey/ Mixed Up The Recipe/ Sweet Shop AU/ Author: ayainu Summary: Kaneki recalls the fun times he spent as a Ravenclaw in Hogwarts with his Honey Badger of a significant other. (Basically used Honey as an excuse to make a Harry Potter au.) Warnings: Just senseless fluff, mentions of Kaneki being uncomfortable with the Asaoka household, it’s kind of a mess because I had a lot of ideas and too little time. Rating: Teen Title: Pensieve

Accompanying art

Out of all his classes in his final year at Hogwarts, Kaneki found himself thinking he’d miss History of Magic the most. Yes, that notorious for its boring nature class. Even though got to take Alchemy due to the heavy demand the previous year. Alchemy was really fun, and he shared it with a lot of his friends, including the snoring honey badger next to him.

He’d known Hide since even before they enrolled into Hogwarts. It used to be one of his biggest worries since he discovered his ability that he’d have to leave Hide behind for Hogwarts.

He had been so conflicted because he honestly wanted nothing more than a golden chance like this to leave the hellish Asaoka household, but Hide was important. So important he knew he’d have discarded his letter had Hide reacted the least bit negatively.

He’d asked him to meet up at their park and found him waiting, perched easily on their whale hill. His heart fluttered in a way it still does to this day, only his eleven year old self had no way of knowing what he did today about the nature of his feelings. Kaneki precisely remembered the warm breeze that surrounded them that day, how he felt like he was breathing icicles in the middle of the summer despite that. He’d been so nervous approaching Hide, his letter cradled in his shaking hands, hidden out of view behind his back.

“Hide..” Kaneki swallowed through the lump in his throat. “I…”

Hide turned to him and cocked his head curiously.

Kaneki took a deep breath to calm his wild heart. He must’ve taken too long because the next thing he knew Hide was standing right in front of him, his palms cushions for Kaneki’s pale cheeks.

“Is everything alright Kaneki?” His tone was so full of his gentle concern that Kaneki found tears prickling at his eyes.

“Yes Hide, everything is okay, more than okay, it’s just..-” I might have to choose between you and my dreams, he was too choked up on his emotions to say.

“Then why do you look like you’re about to cry? Hey, Kaneki what’s the matter?”

“Hide I.. It might sound insane but I was born with magical powers, I just got the letter today, that I’ve been chosen for this super elite magic school, I am happy but…- Hey Hide why are you laughing? I’m serious!”

“Ah- Sorry Kaneki,” Hide wiped mirthful tears from his eyes. “It’s not that I don’t believe you, it’s just-” Hide was cut off by another fit of laughter.

“Hide are you in hysterics? I won’t go if you don’t like it I promise!” Kaneki was confused and panicking, and thank whatever lucky stars he had that Hide collected himself at that moment in an abrupt pause from his laughter.

“No! You absolutely must go Kaneki!” Hide exclaimed too loudly.

“What?” Hide might’ve stopped laughing but it didn’t at all help with Kaneki’s confusion.

“Well you see..” Hide fidgeted with his scavenged his jacket’s pocket for a bit. “You see it’s an odd coincidence but I’ve been meaning to bring this up today..” He brandished a letter identical to his own, and when Kaneki’s sight caught up with his brain he let out a soft gasp and scrambled to tackle Hide in a hug.

“I’m so happy I didn’t want to have to give up anything I’m so happy!” Kaneki’s voice was a string of murmurs against Hide’s shirt.

Hide chuckled and ran his fingers through Kaneki’s hair, ever so gentle.

“So, want to explain?” Kaneki looked over to him, a relaxed smile on his face. They’d settled down after getting over the initial shock on top of their whale hill to piece together what it all meant.

“My family.. They’re all purebloods.”

“Purebloods?”

“That means they’re all pure wizards and witches, no muggle marriages. Only magicians. It’s a given I’m a wizard too.” Hide laughs quietly. “Even if my mother was a muggle..”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, mudblood is the right term for someone like me, at least to them.”

“My mom.. She was human too.”

“To hell with opposites attract huh?”

Kaneki laughed.

***

It was such a relief to have Hide by his side on the train ride to Hogwarts, heavens knew there would’ve been no way for him to run headfirst into a wall if he hadn’t had Hide’s hand clasped tightly in his own.

They had met the others on the train.

The second year Nishiki, his beautiful girlfriend Kimi, the second year Shuu with his expensive clothes and bag, the goddess among mortals Rize and jellybrain Naki.

It was the usual case of Nagachika Hideyoshi’s infectious smile and approachable nature that drew them all in. What surprised him though was that on that train a beautiful girl approached him as well.

“Hi, my name is Rize!” She smiled prettily.

“H-Hi, I’m Kaneki, nice to meet you..” he could feel Hide’s eyes bore into the side of his face. Somehow he felt uneasy.

“The book..” she motioned to the book that was now lying face down on Kaneki’s lap. “I was thinking about reading it too, I really like this author. Is it good?”

Kaneki willingly took the bait and started talking in length about how amazing that book was from what he’s read so far. They discussed the author’s other works too and when the author’s name came up Hide let out a small sound of surprise.

“Hide?” Kaneki looked at him quizzically, concern in his tone.

“Oh it’s- hello by the way I’m Hide!” He smiles easily at Rize and she smiles back. “If it’s Takatsuki Sen then you’ll meet your idol at Hogwarts..”

Both Kaneki and Rize looked at him with excitement that was almost palpable.

“What do you mean Hide?” Kaneki’s voice shook with the force of his anticipation.

“Well she’s a family friend, we go way back. She teaches at Hogwarts,” Hide scratches his cheek bashfully. “She’s actually one of the reasons I’m so excited about Hogwarts..”

“Oh?” It was very immature and irrational for Kaneki to feel a tinge of jealousy at that. Not of Hide because he had personal relations with his idol. Rather, it was because there was someone else other than him that was close to Hide, that Hide was excited to see. It was completely nonsensical of him really.

When the train screeched to a halt, all his worries dissipated and the air in their cart was buzzing with anticipation and excitement.

Kaneki was brought back to the present time when their teacher’s voice raised a notch. He was worried he got caught for zoning out but luckily the teacher’s attention was trained on the other side of the room, where Naki was making a scene as usual.

Trust Naki to keep the teacher’s attention away from Hide’s snoring corpse.

Kaneki let his mind drift back to its reminiscing daydream. Maybe it was the fact that they would say goodbye to Hogwarts soon that got him all emotional and nostalgic.

He’d been absolutely hopeless at flying. Hide on the other hand, was amazing, had it not been for all his “moves” he would’ve been a prodigy. But he insisted he didn’t care about doing it properly as much as he did about doing it with style.

“What’s the point of flying if I’m not going to do it in style? That’s boring!”

Hide had always been incorrigible. Well, at least Rize was there to mellow it out.

Rize was a great friend, after meeting her on the train, he and Hide formed strong bonds with her. They were absolutely inseparable, their duo became a trio and they were both happy about that.

To put it simply, Rize was a fucking badass. She was, in Hide’s own words, awesome and super cool. It was fun to hang out with her and she seemed to genuinely enjoy their company.

Kaneki had been so sure at the sorting ceremony that she’d join him over at the Ravenclaw table but was surprised when the sorting hat proclaimed her a Gryffindor. Looking back on it now Kaneki knew she couldn’t have been anything else, her daring nature and adventurous spirit and sometimes cunningness fit the house description to a T.

But he wasn’t as surprised as the head of the Slytherin though, when the hat had announced Hide a Hufflepuff. The poor man looked absolutely horrified, and Hide’s expression was, in simple terms, shit eating. He loved this, he loved going against all his family’s traditions. He broke their spotless pureblood Slytherin streak and he reveled in the fact.

Hide admitted later that he didn’t believe Slytherin was a bad house, and he thought that he belonged in it to some extent. It wasn’t the house he was going against, it was his family.

Kaneki never trusted Slytherins at all, he was quite shocked to find out Takatsuki Sen, or as he found out, Yoshimura Eto was a Slytherin.

Eto was the person who taught them that Slytherins are only villainized unfairly all the time because a common enemy was needed. She taught them a lot, and continues to. He’ll forever be in her debt for all the help she’d given them with that hopeless mess she called hair that framed her face, pink mouth constantly pulled in a smile, and her signature round glasses perched on her small button nose.

Kaneki glanced over to their teacher when he was snapped back out of his reverie once more. This time it was at the mention of their final N.E.W.T.S. He diligently wrote down what their teacher told them to focus on and put a note to tell Hide later.

They had met the second batch of friends when they were in their second year. The feisty Touka, gentle natured Yoriko, Hairu the madonna of Hogwarts, and Karren the cool beauty.

Touka and Yoriko had been inseparable from the very start, it was only natural that they’d end up befriending Kaneki and Hide. Childhood friends quartet was what they were known as. Karren found home in Shuu’s shadow, and Hairu ended up being the covergirl for the Gryffindors. Yoriko ended up with Hide in Hufflepuff and Touka in Gryffindor with the third year power couple Nishiki and Kimi. Karren also ended up in Gryffindor, luckily the same house as Shuu.

It was all fun times really, with all the new meat. Hide had been overly excited about being an upperclassman and it was kind of adorable to watch.

Around their third year was when Kaneki realized the nature of what he felt. It’d taken him a while, and the insistent prodding of Rize, but he did eventually.

“Rize I think I like Hide, like like, you know?”

“Took you long enough.”

“What?”

“I’m going to make some major money that’s what.”

“You bet on us?”

“No, that was obvious to everyone, we bet when you’d realize and when you’d get action.”

“I can’t believe you guys..”

“Touka gave you two too much credit and said you’d end up together by the end of second year, poor girl lost some big money.”

“I can’t believe this.. even Touka-chan?!”

“Especially Touka-chan, she knows first hand how being with someone your whole life is bound to make you develop some feelings.”

“Wow, so Touka-chan and Yoriko-chan..?”

“I only know that Touka has feelings for her, I haven’t talked to Yoriko much, and Touka seems adamant on never telling her.”

“Wow..”

“Which leads me to you, when do you plan to confess?”

“Ah I- it’s not simple Rize.”

“Of course it’s simple, Hide is a sweet boy he won’t cut off ties with you over something like that. You have nothing to lose, you tell him and he says yes, then good for you and I call best woman, if he doesn’t reciprocate your feelings and wants to stay friends then sorry for you, but good on Hide for being a great person. These are literally the only two turns of events possible I don’t see why not get it over with it’s either win or nothing changes.”

“How much did you bet on us getting together this year Rize?”

“I bet my entire Takatsuki Sen collection’s worth in money, please get on with it.”

“Can’t make you sell the books you love so much, I guess,” Kaneki chuckled, Rize as cunning as ever.

Rize just laughed, her voice a lilting melody.

As a third year, Kaneki didn’t feel invested in befriending the newcomers as he was the year before, but Hide was as relentless as ever. Kaneki was glad for that, the newcomers that year were the most amazing thing that’s ever happened to Hogwarts, no offense to anyone.

Saiko and Shirazu from Hufflepuff, Urie from Slytherin and Hinami the sweet soul and Mutsuki from Ravenclaw. They brought so much life into the dull old school. Even professor Arima ended up becoming friendlier.

Rize had won the bet, Kaneki listened to her and confessed, around a week after he learned about the nature of his feelings.

“.. Hide I need to talk to you..”

“Is something wrong?” Hide, forever the worrywart, panicked immediately. “If it’s about that jellybean prank I already said I’m sorry, and I’m willing to do whatever it takes for you to forgive me!”

Kaneki, despite his nerves, found himself laughing. “No no, Hide I’m okay. Not that I encourage your pranks but I wasn’t actually mad, I found it quite funny actually.” He grinned.

Hide grinned back. “Whassup then?”

Kaneki knotted his fingers together. “Hide I…” he took a deep breath. “Hide I like you! Like like you.”

“Like?” Hide’s eyes were wide and his lips was slightly parted in silent shock. A soft pink dusted his cheeks and nose.

“Like I want to date you..” Kaneki’s face was beet red and he swallowed thickly. “It doesn’t have to change anything between us, I just thought that it’s best to get this out as soon as possible so I don’t have to keep thinking about all the possibilities. I’m sorry if it’s a burden to know.”

“No! Kaneki it’s not a burden at all. Actually I…” Hide cut himself off and took a deep determined breath. “Let’s date.”

“What?” Kaneki sputtered. “It’s not like you have to or anything!”

“No, I want to. I’ve liked you for a while actually, I was shocked when you suddenly confessed but I was really happy.” Hide smiled sweetly at him and Kaneki’s heart hammered in his chest.

You’d think the spark would’ve been gone by now, the flame extinguished. As Kaneki looked over to the little trail of drool at the corner of Hide’s mouth and the way his hair fell in honey-gold waterfalls over his freckled face, he realized his heart thumped as hard as ever, never weakening.

“Hey Hide..” Kaneki whispered but only got a grumble in response, something that sounded suspiciously like ‘hamburger’.

Kaneki shook his head fondly, what an idiot.

They’ve had their ups and downs, their relationship got rocky at times but overall he could only look back on every experience with a smile. Their bonds were strong, and even when their friends teased them about being a lovey dovey couple, they only found pride in that. He’d never forget the first time they held hands for everyone to see in the dining hall. His heart had been thumping, delightful at holding Hide’s hand with an inexplicable dash of nervousness.

His heart would’ve exploded had their first kiss been similar. Thank Hide’s common sense, however scarce at times, that when he pulled him in for a kiss they’d been in the privacy of the gardens, hidden behind the curtain like drooping leaves of a willow.

‘Idiot..’ Kaneki thought fondly as stared some more. In the soft lighting of the class, Hide’s hair looked fluffy and soft. His goldish brown locks reminded him of the color of honey. Almost unconsciously he found his fingers buried in Hide’s hair, and every time he moved them the sweet scent of honey filled his nostrils.

Would he go that far?

Kaneki felt a hand rest over his own and he looked back down at Hide to find his warm brown eyes trained on him, a smile on his lips.

“I take my honey badger pride seriously.”

“No kidding,” Kaneki snorted softly.

“Were you awake the whole time?” Kaneki moped.

“It’s fascinating watching you think. But to answer your question I was only conscious after ‘hamburger’”

Kaneki blushed. “You’re an idiot, you missed some important information about the N.E.W.T.S.”

“Fine, I’ll get you a prerelease copy of Takatsuki’s new work.”

“Signed?”

“With a blue pen, I gotcha.”

“Here then.” Kaneki passed his notebook to him and Hide proceeded to copy the test related notes.

Kaneki yawned. “What’s on next?”

“Alchemy, let’s get moving or Mr. Marude will kill us,” Rize piped from the seat right in front of theirs.

“Oh shit!” Hide grumbled under his breath and collected his things. “Let’s go.”

Kaneki laughed at Hide’s panic and proceeded to collect his things as well.

Ah, he really was going to miss this. But he was also excited. He looked down at the promise ring, a reassuring weight resting against his chest. He and Hide decided to live together after school. Their friends wouldn’t be too far away and could always visit.

He looked forward to the future, even if the past was a sweet series of memories in this place that he had to bitterly leave behind. The past was beautiful, but he couldn’t wait for the amazing things the future has in store for them.

[tenmillionotters]

To build a home

Rating: General

Pairing: Kaneko/Tsukiyama Shuu

Character: Tsukiyama Shuu, Kaneko (Kaneki Ken), Fueguchi Hinami, Banjou Kazuichi, Yomo Renji, Tsukiyama Mirumo

Word count: 1578

Chapter: 2

Additional information: Human AU, Pregnancy, Parent-Child Relationship, Parenthood, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers

Suddenly confronted with the unexpected news of his best friend’s pregnancy, Shuu decides that it’s time to take action and take care of her and the baby. A naive idea soon confronts them with the troublesome reality of being a single parent and an uncle, all whilst trying to figure out their own feelings and plans for the future.

(Based on fanart/idea by @ghostyartblog)

Read on AO3 or under the cut

Buy me a coffee

Frantic steps echoed through the almost empty hospital hallway, heavy breaths were drawn and released, the tension was unbearable, but neither of them dared to speak. They only exchanged worried at times reassuring looks, it would be okay, she would be okay, she was a fighter after all.

“... I can’t do this… it almost feels like she’s giving birth to my baby…,” Shuu laughed but he was pale and shaking like a leave in the wind, he felt Yomo placing his hand on his shoulder, he sighed but there was something like uncertainty in his actions.

“She is strong, she’ll be fine,” but was he sure about that? He remembered when his sister gave birth to her daughter, her husband was just as nervous as Shuu was now. Only a few hours earlier he threw an anger tantrum about why the child’s father wasn’t anywhere near the hospital, but it didn’t help either of them so he now found himself in a state of somberness, even though it was forced.

“Are you Miss Kaneko’s family?”

The men stood up, nodding while holding onto each other expecting the words.

“There there… no need to look at me like that,” the doctor smiled at them, “She gave birth to a healthy girl, congratulations. Give her some time until you go to see her, she needs to rest.”

Even though they were both impatient, they respected the doctor’s order and of course Kaneko. The past months had been so hard for her, she fell sick often, she cried many times not because she didn’t want to give birth to the baby but because she was worried that something, anything, might go wrong. How happy must she have been hearing the news that her baby was alive and healthy?

The hours flew by and they were finally able to visit Kaneko. The young woman was sitting in her bed, smiling bittersweetly as she held her daughter in her arms, she didn’t even notice that her friends were standing next to her bed.

“Oh - … I’m sorry…,” Kaneko gently caressed her daughter’s soft features, “I just can’t believe that this little human had been growing inside of me for the past 9 months now, she’s beautiful, isn’t she?”

Shuu sat down on the edge for the bed and smiled warmly looking at the new addition to their family, “She is… just like her mother, what’s her name?”

“Momoko,” if she would like the name growing up? Hopefully so, “A beautiful name for a beautiful little girl. Do you want to hold her, Yomo-san?” He's been standing so far off the little family it almost felt like he was thinking of himself as an intruder.

“... I do,” it had been years since he had last held a baby in his arms, he carefully picked her up and smiled at her, “Hey there little one.” The baby didn't cry being separated from her mother again, she only looked at the stranger, observing what he did.

“Kids love him, I'm a bit jealous to be honest,” a soft sigh escaped him before he gently placed his hand upon his friend’s, “You’re so strong, I’m very proud of you.”

“... you know I wouldn’t have been able to do this without you…,” did she really have to cry right now? It was a little embarrassing to be honest, especially considering that she was crying in front of them, “If it weren’t for you and the sacrifices you made, I wouldn’t have been able to hold her in my arms today… thank you so much, Shuu.”

“I wouldn’t say it’s a sacrifice, I did it because you’re my best friend,” when he was honest, this was nothing like them to get so sentimental and worked up, but there was a new life being passed around from uncle to uncle back to its mother, there was no way to play it cool right now.

“How long do you have to stay here?”, of course Yomo asked the important questions first, but he did seem to be a little worried.

“Not for long, I can’t wait to finally go home with Momoko… and Shuu.”

What an odd feeling it left in her chest, the swelling and rising, the warmth and the happiness, the tears it provoked to walk home holding her baby in her arms. “We’re almost there,” her lips touched Momoko’s head and the baby made a pleased sound, “Everyone’s waiting for you.” She didn’t feel like telling anyone when she’d come back, no, it was time for her to walk on her own, she didn’t need their support… well, Kaneko didn’t want to rely on them all the time.

Still, she knew how Shuu was, he knew exactly that it was the day that she’d come back, if he had organised another party? It was quiet when she opened the door, as she peeked inside there was no excited crowd waiting for her, “Is anybody home?”

“Ah! You’re back,” now that wasn’t exactly who she expected to see but it wasn’t an unpleasant surprised, “I wanted to see my granddaughter.”

“Did Shuu tell you that I’d come back today, uncle?”, no matter how much time passed and no matter how much emphasis he put on the fact that he’d like her to call him papa, Mirumo would always be her uncle, “I am sorry that I didn’t call you earlier to let you know we’d be coming home…”

“Fukumi, you were stressed, giving birth to a baby is nothing you can brush off easily,” how warm his smile was as he finally got to hold Momoko in his arms, “Hello little princess… I’m your grandpa.”

“Kaneko!”, Shuu might have been a bit too loud but he was just happy to see her again, “Did you make it here safely? Do I need to pay the taxi?”

The young woman waved lightly, she had already taken care of everything, “Don’t worry about it Shuu. Will Mirumo-san stay for dinner?”

A quick glance at his father who was now walking off with Momoko, telling her stories about her mother as if she got what he was saying, was enough for Shuu to know the answer, “I suppose he’d love to stay even longer than that. Are you hungry? Do you need anything?” His fingers brushed lightly over the bags under her eyes, “You look exhausted…”

“... trust me I am… more than anything else.”

Maybe it was rude of her to excuse herself and leave Momoko in care of Shuu and Mirumo, but as soon as she find a moment to relax her body finally gave in, she wasn’t just exhausted, she was drained off all her energy. It was hard to find a moment of peace in the hospital, she barely slept in the night, instead Fukumi watched her daughter sleep, she got up and fed her, but sleep was always something out of consideration.

Up until now.

Just to lie in her own bed after a little over a week felt so good, her stomach was still sore from the c-section, her body didn’t recover fully from the stress so all she could do now was drift into a dreamless sleep, but as much as she wished for it to be dreamless an unnamed and unfamiliar panic suddenly overcame her. “Momoko -”

Her bare feet touched the ground and she blindly wandered through the darkness searching for her crying child; someone else had already made his way to the baby’s bedroom, all the young mother could do was stop in the doorframe and watch the man pick her baby up.

“Shhh… what’s wrong, hime-sama? I’m here now, are you hungry? No, we fed you… ah… I need to change your diaper, hm? No problem,” he waltzed over to the changing table and carefully laid the baby down, “We’ll be done soon, no need to cry, you’ll soon be able to sleep again, you’ll need plenty of sleep so you can grow up and become just as beautiful as your mama.”

Such a sweet talker, did he know she was listening…? Even if he didn’t, who cared anyway. All that was important now was that he took care of Momoko. Did she fail as a mother already…? God, where did that thought come from all of the sudden…? Asking for help didn’t make her a bad person or a bad mother, but she was exhausted so it was easy to succumb into thinking like that.

“There you go… now sleep well, hime-sama, you can call for me any time and I’ll be here to come for you aid,” he bowed after he made sure that the baby was comfortable and pleased, “Oh! Fukumi, I didn’t know you’re awake.”

What kind of slip was that all of the sudden? He never called her by her first name, “I heard Momoko scream, but you were here faster than me, thank you, Shuu.”

“No need to thank me, you need rest. I told you’re not doing this alone,” maybe it was because of the late hours, the time was passing so much slower, he carefully wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly, “This isn’t an easy task Fukumi, that’s why I’ll stay with you… through it all.”

“... what did I do to deserve you…?”, in this moment she wasn’t sure what was louder, the rain hammering against the windows and roof, or the self doubt that was slowly but steadily eating her alive.

[indumentumxris-blog]

     From a young age, he was alone. Days feeding and surviving spent without company, without friend or family to guide him or give him a sense of moral direction, drifted far, far into adulthood. Bad habits developed into sadism, into manipulation, into a cold husk that seemed to drift along, corpse to corpse, month to month. But still, that violence had come from humble beginnings, and from time to time something within him bitterly ached for the memories of a face he should have instead forgotten.

     Every human reminded him of that face. Even Kaneki. Even Sousuke. They all held that quality of humanity within them that he had been long (subconsciouly) searching to replace from the dead friend lost so long ago, he couldn’t count the years anymore. He didn’t know how young he was, but it was at that point, after having already lost the short-lived family that had brought him into the world, that he lost her too. It was from then that he had been left alone, and he let himself think that there were entire universes between the world of Ghouls and the world of Humans.

     The actions he had taken in his time as a Clown were something he kept within himself, never choosing to let it be known to the young man he seemed to be growing closer to everyday. Everyone had secrets, he figured, but it wasn’t until his violent ends followed him to that day in Hive City, harming another Ghoul that could have been spared of it all. She was probably still living with the shameful memory of being left barely breathing, barely moving, barely regenerating from the brutal act he had done. Cannibalism among Ghouls wasn’t unheard of, but the sadism it took to leave another to wallow in the pain of it was unorthodox. It took a specific kind of mindset to leave that as it was.

     Uta didn’t expect that certain emotion to rise within him when he looked at Sousuke after the deed had been done, or when he touched him, or when they shared a spare laugh or smile together. That emotion was heavy, and left Uta to frown in his free time, away from the rest of the world. No one had seen him like this (no matter how minor the change from his usual expression and personality). No one needed to.

     — But the fact remained that their relationship felt like a lie.

     Sousuke didn’t know who Uta was, not at all. And while that had been desirable for some time, by now, all it left was a bad taste in his mouth. She was still in the city, and there was no room for denial in his role harming her for little reason at all. Whatever Hive City was doing to him, whether or not he wanted to admit it, it was making him restless. Restless, displeased, and guilty.

     He waited in front of the door that belonged to his... partner, having already given the door a few knocks. With little effort, he felt the regular frown dissipate, knowing what he wanted to get out of this visit in particular. It was brewing in his head for the past few weeks; he’d long known what he wanted to say. 

@ilikebottombunk