#no further comments on the matter bc this world is a nightmare and this is my selfship blog. but byyeeeee joe
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Biden dropped out while I was at pride??????? Lol
#yes where I'm at does it in july#no further comments on the matter bc this world is a nightmare and this is my selfship blog. but byyeeeee joe#anyway. I got to see bears and pups so everything in the world is beautiful to me ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡#roz posts
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You Better Work, Bitch | KNJ ONE-SHOT PREVIEW
— PAIRING: executive!namjoon x executive!reader — GENRE: angst, smut +18. minors dni — WARNING: tba — SUMMARY: Making your way in the corporate world as a woman is an everyday battle that you thought you were winning - until a mansplaining nightmare of a man arrived and threatened your already fragile position in the boardroom. Will his handsome face and good intentions be enough for you to give him a chance? —WORDS: tba I'm dropping this lil thing here bc I'm out of town and can't post the whole thing 🥺 but this comes from a request that I loved!
“Pardon me?” Slamming the papers on the table, you turned to look at him in the eye with your well-known icy stare. You felt proud when he diverted his eyes to the side.
“I’m not a temp that just had a good idea at the right time. I’m a high-ranked executive and coming up with feasible plans is part of my job, so I won’t give them to a newbie just because he’s the chairman’s dear.”
“Sorry if anything I said confused you, that’s not what I wanted.” You scoffed. You were conscious that you were acting a little rude and maybe it was not in your best interest to be so salty towards someone close to the CEO, but you had to set a precedent: do not mess with Y/N.
“Oh no, you were very clear as you mansplained my plan to the board to give a good impression. But I can’t help you with that, you will have to give them something of your own.” Namjoon looked genuinely confused by what you said.
“I didn’t realize that I mansplained you –”
“But you did.”
“– But I apologize. In my perspective, I was just picking up an idea that was disregarded too fast and that I found interesting. Just that.” He sounded honest too. You sighed. It was past 7 PM on a Friday and you were incredibly tired. You decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and go home. If the incident had happened on Monday at 2 PM, Namjoon would’ve known the entirety of your fury.
“Fine, Mr. Kim. It better not happen again” you threatened pointing a finger at him. His response was to show his palms up in surrender and flash a charming smile you had seen in men before, when they wanted you to forgive them and to fall to their feet. You arched an eyebrow instead.
“It will not, Miss Executive. But, uh, the office is giving me a welcome party in the BBQ place near, will you be there?” The part of the conversation that mattered to you had ended and so you resumed your task of piling the three folders left.
“To receive backhanded comments while they are sober and misogynist takes when they are drunk? Goodbye, Mr. Kim.” He had no time to reply before you exited the room.
To no one’s surprise, Namjoon kept mansplaining most ideas and problems you brought up in the boardroom. You didn’t know, though, that in his head he was doing a noble thing. To him, he was being the perfect gentlemen that shed light onto your brilliant work when others tried to dismiss it, so Namjoon job was to further explain your presentations, so your smart brain that came up with such projections could be appreciated as you deserved. In mundane words, it was mansplaining with good intentions.
The problem was, you had had enough of him.
#bts one shot#bts x reader#bts smut#namjoon x reader#namjoon one shot#namjoon angst#namjoon smut#namjoon#bts
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hello love !!
could you write a blurb about an insecure reader? i’ve been feeling a little bit down lately bc summer is coming and i’m so not ready to show my body to the world :(( i’m basically living in baggy clothes bc of my way to large boobs, belly & thighs lmao
you don’t have to write it, but thank you if you do! 🤍
summary: tom reassures you on your insecurities
tom holland x (fucking perfect, yes you) reader
w/c exactly 1000😳
a/n - i just want to say that i can guarantee you’re gorgeous. and i know it’s much easier said than done, but fucking own it babe, all of you is perfect and all that matter is that you know that <33
You and Tom had had plans for today scheduled for the past few weeks. A simple barbecue with his family after not being able to see them for a while and up until trying to pick out an outfit today, you were excited.
You didn’t know what it was, maybe it was just an off day for you, but all you knew was that you were on the verge of tears and you really fucking hated how you looked in this dress. With every glance at the clock you would only get more and more stressed as your time started to run out quicker, but you couldn’t seem to draw your eyes away from the mirror.
You knew Tom would call you silly for thinking like this, he always told you that what you thought were flaws were actually some of his favourite things about you. But of course that darker side of you told you he was supposed to say that, he was your boyfriend for god’s sake.
You were snapped out of your mind when you heard Tom’s voice, the man entering the room looking perfect and as attractive as always.
“Are you ready to go?” he asked, eyes glued to the screen of his phone where he was most likely updating his brothers on when you’d be leaving the house. He didn’t look up until he got no response from you, eyes drifting over to where you were standing in the mirror.
He wouldn’t have noticed the tears if you weren’t frantically trying to wipe them away, a quiet sniffle coming from you as you did so.
Concern washed over Tom as he watched his love stand there clearly upset, shuffling over to you to see what he could do. You wanted to scream as you felt his hands slip onto your waist. Usually you thrived under Tom’s touch, the man’s love language always managing to make you feel warm and loved, but right now you’d say it was your worst nightmare. What if he touched you and realised everything you saw about yourself?
“What’s going on in that pretty little head?” he whispered, resting his chin on your shoulder. His eyes watched your face through the mirror, seeing how you purposely avoided his gaze.
“I feel so,” you paused, feeling a lump swelling in the back of your throat. You couldn’t even put it into words, but thankfully with the way you were looking at yourself he could assume well enough.
“Hey, hey,” he cooed, gently guiding your chin so you were looking at him, just so you could see the sincerity in his words. “None of that.”
His voice told you that he wasn’t asking, this was Tom telling you with much confidence.
“You, my love, are perfect. Look like a fucking goddess,” he said. Part of you wanted to say he was lying, he was just saying this to make you feel better, but not even the best of the best actors could fake that look of love and adoration in Tom’s eyes. “Especially in this dress.”
It was such a simple statement but the mere look in his eyes said it all, and somehow it was all you really needed.
“Let me prove it,” he said, gently resting his forehead against yours. The moment was so soft, so loving that you thought you’d burst, and with a simple nod of your own head he was shifting to press kisses all over you.
You felt like you could cry again, happy tears this time, as his lips pressed against you. He trailed his kisses from your jaw down to your shoulders, taking a second between each one to tell you how much he loved you. Then it was down to your boobs, a few comments from your boyfriend about how much he really loved those, of which brought a smile to your face, your fingers threading in his hair.
“Handmade by the Gods, honestly,” he whispered. “Never met someone so perfect.”
You had to bite your lip to try and force down the sob that wanted to break past your lips, but a happy one of course.
His hands gently trailed down your waist to your hips, feeling the soft fabric of your dress under the palms of his hands. His lips moved down to your belly, a shaky inhale on your part.
“Love here too, protecting my darling’s organs.” You let out a giggle at his words, the sentence one you didn’t expect to come from him. “Making sure she’s all safe.”
Now you were positive you were going to explode. No other man but yours would ever do this for you, and you didn’t know how to thank Tom for it.
He cheekily allowed his hands to follow the path of the curve of your behind, giving a simple squeeze that had you playfully scolding the man for acting like some kind of horny school boy. He just chuckled, looking up at you with those lovesick heart eyes that he always possessed whenever he looked at his gorgeous girl.
“And these,” he stated, gripping your thighs with a simple kiss placed on the top of each. “Fit so perfectly in my hands. ‘S like you were made for me.”
You didn’t let him get any further before you were pulling him back up to his normal height, a silly grin on his face as he saw the love he’d instilled back in your eyes.
Your lips softly pressed against your boyfriend’s, a soft, intimate moment that you wish would last forever. You were hesitant to pull away but the look Tom gave you after you had was so worth it.
“Thank you,” you whispered, playing with the short curls of hair that were on the nape of his neck.
“I just told you how I love you,” he replied, speaking with complete honesty that once again made your heart swell. “Now, let’s go see my family, and fucking own that dress, baby.”
tom holland taglist → @seutarose @lmaotshollandd @photoshopart15 @hopelessly-harry @call-me-baby-gir1 @icyhollands @sinisterspidey @siriuslyslyslytherin @musicalkeys-blog @itstaskeen @tpwk-grande @zspideyy @spideyssunshine @givebuckyhisplumsnow @lowkey-holland @hollandcrush @wizkiddx @sannie-san-shine @sonnydoesrandomshit @hopeless-romantic-baby @thehumanistsdiary @dummiesshort @itsbieberxholland @lillucyandthejets @piscesparker @bvttercupbby @mymilliefrommarketing @spideyspeaches @kujokura @l0velyevans @jess-holland23 @celestialholland @moonlight-onyx @captainamirica @tomsirishgirlx @lou-la-lou @slutforsr @tayyx @bora-world @annathesillyfriend @lovableparker @whoeveniskendall @hollandswife @sunwardsss @dhtomholland @messedupmyfuckinglife @bi-lmg @londonspidey @multixfandomwriter @mrsholland96 @tomhollandismyhusband1996 @just-lost-inbetween-worlds @magicalxdaydream @hallecarey1 @aayaissaa @jacksnoodles @cedricdiggorysimpp @mamaparker28 @edmundspevensea
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the only proof i need is you (taywhora)
it is finally done, i've been wokring on this since the ukd tour started but we don't need to talk about that, it's kind of a sequel to my older canon compliant fics but can be read sepereatly. love my dear mina for always betaing shit I send them, an actual icon
title from proof by Paramore bc that song got stuck in my head as I was tryna get a title, enjoy :)) ao3 link
Tayce relished in the energy she got from this, after so long away from gigs the euphoria wasn’t lost on her. They were lucky, finally able to experience the dizzying highs of such public notoriety.
The heat didn’t help things— of course, they’d get stuck in a heatwave during a cross country tour. The amount of sweat, makeup running by the end of the show, outfits sticking in places they shouldn’t. It was a nightmare, but she wouldn’t trade it for anything
Her attention was pulled back to reality by the laughter of her friends, using silly Instagram filters on each other to amuse them. They stumbled towards her in a flurry of giggles, knocking into her arms and almost sending her falling over into the crowd. A’whora raised her phone to Tayce, erupting into laughter at the way the screen contorted her face into something unrecognisable.
---
“Are you done with those?” Tayce asked, gesturing to A’whora’s fries while his attention was laser focused on his phone.
Before he could answer, Tayce plucked a chip anyway, putting it in his mouth much to A’whora’s chagrin. He huffed, eyes narrowing at such an act of treason.
“You hound!” He swatted at Tayce’s arm as he reached for another. “What happened to yours?”
Tayce lent in further, smiling fiendishly and chewing obnoxiously loud. “Ate them, like, ten minutes ago. You’ve been staring at your phone for the past hour and they’re gonna go cold, missy.”
“I’m eating at my own pace!”
“You eat slower than Lawrence picks up choreo.” Tayce grinned, his heart warming at the way his friend pouted, arms crossed — he was too cute when he got all riled up.
“Don’t involve me in your lovers' spats!” Lawrence hissed from across the table, laughing at the way Tayce’s eyes narrowed. He knew Lawrence was only having one of those stupid more-than-friends jokes, but any implications of their relationship being anything other than professional made the room seem a little too tense for his liking.
“She’s right, you two argue like an old married couple.” Bimini chimed in, resting their head on their hands like this was an everyday event.
“This isn’t an argument, a crime has been committed and you two are bystanders letting such an act go unpunished!”
“It’s a fucking chip.”
A’whora glared at Lawrence for such a comment. It was his chip. Tayce had his own, he could deal with himself. He had a bad habit of eating things that weren’t his and flirting his way out of any repercussions. He’d buy A’whora more of something most of the time but the annoyance was justified after a year of having his food stolen.
Bimini let out an exasperated laugh, the idiocy of the pair never failing to be both amusing and tiring. They bickered like children sometimes but there was a layer of deep connection under it, two people so strong in their unity that nothing could break them apart.
Except a chip apparently.
They slid their own half eaten pack over, not likely to eat the rest anyway. It would be worth the quiet of Tayce settling down with more food for a little while. They missed the peace of them all being passed out from a long night’s show.
“Tayce, you can have the rest of mine, just leave her alone.”
“Let the whore have her own food, you hound.” Lawrence huffed, Tayce snickering at the moniker. It made him raise an eyebrow, nodding before turning his attention back to his fries.
It was hilarious seeing him get so riled up but there was a small pang in Tayce’s chest, he genuinely was a bit upset about having his food taken, it was a constant that always riled him up no matter how much Tayce replaced. He slid a few fries over, secretly enjoying the bright smile that took over A’whora’s face, giving a thankful nod.
---
Tayce felt the repetitive movement of the car slowly lull him to sleep, they were all too tired to do much of anything, passing out in the back of the tour bus in full drag, not even the energy to take it off before going to their hotels. A’whora was next to him, head leant against his shoulder. He looked so peaceful, making it hard to believe he’d been performing in the horrid heatwave an hour ago.
Bimini was on the other side of them, by the window. They’d curled in on themself, contorted in a way that couldn’t have been comfortable. She’d have to laugh when they complained of back pain the next morning. Lawrence was beside them, stretched across the seat between him and bimini. It was strange to see everyone so low energy, though Tayce himself felt it. So many shows in such quick succession, his body wasn’t ready no matter how much preparation went into it.
A bump in the road jolted him back to attention, though the rest of them were long gone from consciousness. At least he thought. His attention turned back to A’whora, taking in all of his features without the prying eyes of anyone. Something about the sight of him, head reclined on Tayce’s shoulder looking like it was the most comfortable thing in the world, it made his heart warm.
Those feelings still went unsaid, he wasn’t ready for a lot of things, A’whora knew that. He knew with time he would open up, it just took patience and love.
---
Tayce’s energy was electric, his constant bouncing and talking leaving the others in the tour bus in a similar state.
Long drives were boring, he had to make it more interesting somehow. A’whora and Lawrence exchanged a look as Tayce set up an Instagram live, mentally preparing for the chaos that would surely follow.
Lawrence was half amused and half mortified at the act that followed, A’whora cheekily shaking her ass on the camera, much to the amusement of the viewers, Tayce slapping it as if it was no big deal. He’d probably come to regret that later but the moment buzzed with the excitement for their next show, the tour in general, and the euphoria of touring with some of his best friends.
The rowdy energy kept up for the rest of the day, Tayce rarely lost his buzz as A’whora had come to learn, it was a blessing until it was late and she was ready to go out when all he could do was pass out in the hotel room.
They had to share this time due to availability, acting like it was a minor inconvenience when it was all they wanted now, to feel the comfort of someone going through the same grueling thing as you, waking up next to Tayce was euphoric. Something about him took the best, happiest feelings out of A’whora and left him a gooey mess of love and laughs.
Though Lawrence was catching on, or so Tayce claimed he thought, confiding in A’whora knowing even he could keep this secret. He knew better than to say something like that, Tayce’s vulnerability was difficult to keep, any sign of trouble and he’d close right back up for a long time to come.
“Oh, there are the lovers.” He boldly prodded the pair, erupting into a laugh as Tayce scowled. The atmosphere was too tense for 9 am, the previous night out leaving him in a precarious state of trying to balance a normal act and a vicious headache that only a kiss from A’whora had managed to vanquish.
“Well what crawled up your ass and died?” He followed up, Tayce’s glare frosting over in a way that truly worried A’whora. He was not happy and he didn’t want to sit in a car all day full of tension. Where was Bimini in this mess?
“It’s too early for this shit, settle down.”
His voice seemed to reason more with Tayce as he got into the car, quickly pulling a’whora beside him. Bimini came out a while later, apologising for the wait. None of them ever seemed to be on time, it was almost as if they took it in turns this tour.
Their presence brought some much needed peace as Tayce started perking up through the journey, still oddly quiet but much better than wanting to bite Lawrence’s head off this morning.
---
“A’whora! God, hurry up!” A shout came from Bimini as they prodded her to change faster. Damn costumes, never easy to get off in a hurry.
Tayce watched it with muffled laughter, the misfortune not enough to need intervention but much too amusing to leave alone.
Lawrence shared in her amusement, though had no problem commenting on her time wasting.
“I thought I was the slow one, the whore’s got us all beat.” She commented, the room erupting in laughter much to A’whora’s annoyance.
“Stupid fucking outfit! Tayce?” The complaint was followed by a pleading whine, her eyes starting to tear up with sheer frustration.
Tayce obliged, walking over and unzipping the outfit to let A’whora out, grabbing her new one and sliding it up her body, slowly as to allow her to get in without rushing.
A’whora felt herself almost quiver, the feeling of Tayce’s hands running down her back taking her back to—
Nope. She couldn’t do this, not during a show. Keeping this secret would eat her alive by the time they got finished with this tour but she could enjoy the little moments they had, as inconspicuous as possible.
“Talk about sexual tension.”
“Oh fuck off Lawrence.” Tayce shot back. Before any more words could be exchanged they were rushed back on stage for a group number.
Thank god for Tayce.
—-
Tayce let himself fall onto the bed with a loud groan. It was incredible being able to perform for huge crowds and meet their fans but this was a new kind of exhaustion. He felt the need to hibernate for the next week. Beside him, A’whora flopped down, a similar sigh leaving his lips.
“I can’t wait to get home, I’ve got a face mask and a few packs of percy pigs waiting for me.”
“Is that all you ever think about? You better share, missy.” Tayce teased, a tired grin spreading across his face, elating his boyfriend who rolled over to press a kiss to his cheek.
“Only if you ask politely, or maybe you do something nice for me.” The last part came out in a purr, their faces so close Tayce swore A’whora could feel the heat rising off his face at the insinuation.
It wasn’t like he couldn’t play along, flirting and calling his bluffs. But this was more intimate, the two of them, together. No one else, no need to worry about keeping it down so their roommates wouldn’t find out. It was a flash of a possible future. The pair of them working, joking, and loving together.
It dawned on him then, cuddled together without a care in the world after the most exhausting two weeks of his life. This was what he wanted, he didn’t care what other people thought. Something melted away without him realising, leaving his heart bare and ready for the taking though A’whora always let him set the pace.
“I love you, George.”
He froze. Did he hear that right? Did Tayce just say he loved him? Tayce, the one who could never let himself be vulnerable, much less admit his deepest feelings.
“I love you too.” He choked out, sounding more shocked than he knew possible. Tayce couldn’t help but laugh, he wasn’t expecting it but that reaction was nothing less than adorable. He pulled him into a soft kiss, enjoying their closeness before they both drifted off, hardly ready for the travel and fatigue of tomorrow but safe and cosy in the presence of each other.
He could get used to this.
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a fuckton of things i want in da4
a few words censored bc tumblr will swallow this in the void if i dont. long ass fuck list ahead
a romanceable dwarf
more romanceable elves/qunari
more elf/qunari/dwarf companions
consistent writing for once
more nb representation
good hair. please just give me good hair options. give me long hair. give me luxurious flowing locks. give me braids. give me good fucking hair options
let me shittalk the chantry
dalish elf npcs that impact the plot in unique ways
dalish elf companions that are proud of being dalish
if it is set in tevinter maybe uh. maybe address the issue of systemic oppression (and slavery) of elves???????
a return of the friendship/rivalry system in da2 but improved. maybe instead of a friendship rivalry sliding scale its friendship/rivalry/animosity sliding scale. bc rivalry is more like. two people pushing each other to be better than they were before. friendly competition. hes an idiot but hes my idiot kind of deal. animosity would be just regular disapproval. i liked the crisis cutscenes in dai so high animosity would be the same as low approval and might make the companion leave still, but theres more variety with high approval. high approval “friendship” would be the “were best friends and we share many opinions and agree on almost everything” while high approval “rivalry” being “we disagree on almost everything but goddamn it youre my friend and ill follow you into the fade if i have to��� so you can have a high approval with someone instead of being a kissass
actions and choices having consequences again
multiple endings again (epilogue slideshows dont count)
dialogue wheels with descriptions that match what you actually say
characters from rivain, antiva, anderfels, etc
gifts. bring back the gifts. i want to give my companions gifts
maybe. maybe a focus of non-andrastian religion for once?
let me shittalk the chantry
i know its a stretch, but maybe. diverse skin colours. please?
nd characters that are written respectfully and treated w dignity
please bring back the talent wheel from dao and da2
more bi romance options
more wlw romance options
more mlm romance options
ace romance options
nb romance options
background romances
let me shittalk the chantry
far fetched but maybe a polycule?
i lowkey LOVED the fast-paced feel of da2s combat so maybe bring that back in some form? maybe improved to mesh with the tactics of dai to give players absolute freedom of playstyle whether they want to be like me and rush into every encounter or play more strategically
companions with unique companion abilities
would be nice to explore cities
would be nice if the open world were a little smaller so it doesnt feel empty all the gd time
more mage spells. mages felt like just another class of fighter to me in dai. they dont really have any awe-inducing wow factor like in dao or even da2. if the narrative wants me to believe that mages are powerful and dangerous and that it takes multiple templars to hunt down an apostate, maybe show that? give me strong mages
remove the jump ability. its pointless
a narrative that addresses the oppression that the chantry and templars perpetuated please
bring back the attributes
make the choices in dai matter. mages governing themselves? i wanna see that
let me shittalk the chantry
please bring back the healing magic for fucks sakes
multi-class system between rogues and warriors?
multiple specialisations that feel like specialisations and not just skill tree+
player-only skill trees
hardening
companion quests that affect their abilities and further dialogue
actual morally grey choices instead of this stupid mage freedom vs templar oppression narrative that is in no way morally grey but is presented as such and thus leaves the conflicts and narratives set up by dao and da2 to be fucking meaningless
bring back the tactics
would be nice to have an origins-esque prologue again. maybe one that would determine future events in game just to give your character better narrative cohesion with the plot
an approval/disapproval system but for companions with other companions. bringing certain companions together may bring them closer or make them pissed off with each other which affects banter maybe quests maybe combat
give me a fucking mabari bioware. give me back my fucking mabari
day/night cycle
a nightmare mode where you have to finish the main quest on a time limit. it is absurd that dai expects me to believe that i have all this time to do wartable missions that can take literal real life DAYS to finish and still thwart corypheus’ plans in time. bullshit
that said. no more wartable missions. waiting for a countdown to finish isnt very fun
let me shittalk the chantry
kal-sharok. ive been hearing about it since dao let me fucking see kal-sharok
dwarven politics
politics in general. my fav dao quest was the succession crisis plotline in orzammar/the landsmeet and wewh in dai
npcs i can talk to. even with generic dialogue like in dao. makes the world more alive
using the environment to your advantage. far fetched but i would love to be able to pull down boulders if were in the mountains or freeze water to get to places as a mage
home base customisation but the customisation choices you make actually. mean something. and do something. or at the very least give more companion dialogue/banter/approval change
laconic and ergonomic codexes. like. sorted by what kind of codex it is, etc etc but then you just get a brief summary of the codex and the option to read more about it so i dont spend eternity scrolling through cards looking for a specific codex entry. cool aesthetic dont get me wrong but real irritating to deal with. also. maybe. the pc making comments about the codex if you do read more about it? like a dalish elf saying “they got it all wrong” when reading a codex about dalish elves written by a human??? that would a) give character to the pc b) incentivise people to actually read the codex to see what was so wrong about it c) summarise the codex for people who want to learn the lore but dont want to spent the entire game reading text
maybe have the merchants in your home base close to crafting stations so you dont have to take a fucking hike if you miscounted the amount of elfroot you need?
let me shittalk the chantry
avvar companion maybe??? interesting lore right there
bring back stat requirements for weapons and remove the class restriction for most shit. obviously a dagger would be better for a rogue than a longsword and a mage would do better with a staff than a sword and shield but its not about efficiency. its about the roleplay. its about the options. give me the option to make a mage with wildly inappropriate stat distribution
bring back sustained mode abilities
traps. bring back traps. bring back the option to stealth into an area, trap the fuck out of it, and go from there
have the three available classes in kind of a rock paper scissors scenario. warriors do real well against rogues who do real well against mages who do real well against warriors. so you can plan your party depending on who/what youll face AND how much their approval will change during the quest you take them on
let me shittalk the chantry
actually resolve the plot points introduced in dai
a more threatening villain. the inquisitor thwarted every attempt made by corypheus in dai. he was not threatening at all
queer characters. background, companions, etc. queer characters
mounts were meh in dai. maybe. make them faster? or less cumbersome? or have your companions on mounts too so theres still banter?
i liked the armour tinting. let me have armour tinting from the beginning
i would really like mages to move and attack at the same time bc lowkey standing in one spot is uhhhhhhh kinda boring
let me check companions friendship/rivalry levels
would be nice if the narrative acknowledged that elves suffered greatly at the hands of the chantry and stopped victim-blaming them
more taverns. specifically like tapsters in dao where theres a dwarf just reciting something in a language i cant understand and if you look its a ballad/poet about dwarven culture and that was a real nice touch let me have that
dalish elf clan. dalish elf clan that does not get murdered please and thank you
meaningful quests. more cinematic dialogue
make found gear / quest reward gear more valuable than crafted gear
game modifiers like in dai were real nice. i want more
let me shittalk the chantry
quests that can be resolved in multiple ways. like connors fate in dao. and for those ways to impact further quests
companions with varying moral alignments
companions that are mutually exclusive (like alistair and loghain) but are both good companions so itd really make you think
a pc that IS NOT a “chosen one” vanilla da2 is my fav dragon age game for one reason and one reason only and that is because hawke is just some random refugee who escaped lothering. no chosen one magic at all. just an ordinary person who is a real good fighter. and that appealed to me more than this “you are the only one who can do it” narrative
let me meet more elvhen gods
if the setting is in tevinter, GIVE ME FUCKING ARCHITECTURE. give me the high spires, the archways, the buttresses, give me statues lining city gates and magic infused into the buildings. tevinter is a land ruled by MAGES give me magical architecture. give me floating buildings. give me fire floating as orbs above the streets like lamps. GIVE ME ARCHITECTURE
SHALE
let me shittalk the chantry
PIERCINGS GIVE ME FUCKING PIERCINGS BIOWARE
more main quests, longer main quests
if it is set in tevinter maybe. maybe address the fact that tevinter has been at war with the qunari for a while? on and off war is still war. and maybe give us the option to influence the outcome of that war?
more voice options. instead of just american voice or british voice, do the thing in dao again where there are multiple voices of different tones to further cement the pcs personality
more armour designs
biased but uh. can. can taliesen jaffe va a character?
i already said qunari companions but specifically saarebas companions
blood magic
FINISHING MOVE ANIMATIONS
please do not let it be as long as inquisition. inquisition was a SLOG in later playthroughs
body sliders. what if i want a tall but lanky qunari? what if i want a buff as shit elf? body sliders
more eye options
let me call out companions
btw bioware. if you really wanted cullen to be a good guy. maybe handle his fucking redemption arc a little better instead of retconning all the terrible and creepy shit hes done in the past k thx
can female walk/run animations not have. so much swaying hips? no one moves like that
personality dialogue that affects future dialogue like in da2 but meshed with the wider range of emotions introduced by dai
keep the race/s*x lock on romance candidates like in dai. keep the fact that some characters can only be romanced by certain races or s*xes
nb and genderqueer options for the pc
cutscenes of companions interacting
ngl i lowkey liked the random encounters of dao so maybe bring that back
my fav quest in dao is the landsmeet / orzammar succession crisis questline but you know whats my second favourite? the rescue mission if the warden gets captured and you have to play as your party members. give me that again
more creepy/dark shit. dai was too lighthearted for me esp after da2 and dao
let me shittalk the chantry
broodmothers. in hd.
red lyrium broodmothers. in hd
companions with different backgrounds. different faiths. different statuses. different families. etc
maybe make the pcs appearance make an impact on the story? like how bull says he likes redheads, but even if you are a redhead, he says nothing about it????? maybe keep track of which slider the player picks so that can affect the story?
i love my inquisitors but maybe. dont. bring the inquisitor in as anything more than an advisor/npc in this game? let me fall in love with a new pc???
if theres gonna be a homebase like skyhold where youre not in armor. maybe give us better clothing?
a kind of gear skin mechanic similar to ac:odyssey where you can change how the gear looks but keep the stats. so you can equip that higher level armour and keep the look and aesthetic of your old armour and you unlock the skins/looks of the armours you discover/make so you can be both powerful AND aesthetic
i enjoyed the nobility/underworld/arcane/etc knowledge in dai unlocking more dialogue options so maybe keep/expand on that but make it more accessible by side missions or companions or something that isnt the abysmal perk system in dai
let me shittalk the chantry
customisable walking animations. does the pc walk straightbacked? slouched? with a swagger? please
since there will undoubtedly be an obligatory fade sequence, maybe have an option for nightmare demons that ARENT spiders. thank you
slap on subtitles and conlang some languages. i want to hear elvish. i want to hear tevene. give me the languages
more dragons. esp if they look vastly different
more bard songs
i am completely biased here, but i would like to hear laura bailey as a va for a character. preferably a voice option for the pc
hey maybe have the true ending actually included in the base game and not in a dlc (tresppasser cough cough)
better val royeaux
please remove the had to do it to em idle animation tis distracting
on that note, more idle animations. maybe some unique to companions?
very trivial but. unique stair climbing/descending animation
bring back talking to companions on the road. maybe with some dialogue that can only be said on the road???
if banter is interrupted, make like rdr2 and pick up where the banter left off
more vallaslin designs please?
if theres another formal scene like dai maybe. give us. decent clothing. or better yet, decen clothing OPTIONS. i wanna decide how i look in a ball full of haughty orlesians
mage vs templar conflict resolved and addressed please. it is NOT resolved in dai. what we got was sequel bait and a slideshow. resolve it please
let me shittalk the chantry
a pro-mage anti-circle circle mage companion like anders
religious person who doesnt victim-blame elves in the codex or in game or anywhere please
characters more like leliana who question the chantry and acknowledge its corruption and greed
unapologetically sapphic companion
idc if its tevinter i dont want to fucking see queer people being disrespected
a true tal-vashoth companion, one who escaped from the qun
have quest decisions affect whether or not a companion will turn hostile to you or not
if IF solas will be redeemed, please do the redemption arc right
more horn options for qunari
an apostate mage who doesnt use me for their personal agenda whilst hiding something from me (morrigan, anders, solas) thanks
i really dig the whole “leader of an army” thing dai was trying to go for. but you didnt actually. lead. anything. would be nice to have that option. command soldiers. send them places that affect further quests. would even use the wartable for its intended purpose. planning wars. battles. like. you get sent word that there are bandits harassing villagers. you can set up an ambush with your soldiers or confront them headon, and theres a new mini-location on the map like the manor you meet vivienne in where you can go deal with the bandits and depending on your choices, there are actually soldiers with you in a field, or traps in a narrow pass, or even in a city. id rather the wartable shit dont return but if they have to, at least this way youre not just waiting real life time for a bunch of text to appear
i am real fucking excited for the possibility that da4 companions can just fucking die on you. good shit. give me that angst
missions that certain companions would refuse to go with you to. you know. so you actually have to use other members of your party instead of the same 3 (three) people all the goddamn time
disabled characters (i want a character who suffers from the same chronic bad leg disease as i do is that too much to ask)
kinda touched on by the da2 combat point but let me do close combat damage with the staff
no multiplayer. and if there is a multiplayer, dont tie it with achievements
let me fucking explore weisshaupt
(i dont think solas will be the endgame villain of da and i dont think da4 will be the last da game but still) again. for emphasis. resolve the plot points dai brought up
full-body scars and tattoo options
companions and npcs changing their opinions about things over time. eg: a pro-circle mage wanting instead for circles to be abolished after a specific side mission or a main quest decision etc
keep the multiple companion quests. and maybe change what kinds of companion quests are available further down depending on choices made in previous companion quests
please for fucks sake give us more characters of colour
let me shittalk the chantry
#dragon age#dragon age 4#da4#long post#its 3 am and i am once again putting on my clown wig bc bioware will fucking disappoint me again
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Blood Sport
Note: my sister’s boyfriend named it so shoutuot to Andrew who is every bit of embarrassing as me. It makes sense you’re dating my sister.
Shout out to mi querida, Who i'm 97% sure inspired this somehow, even if I can't pinpoint how or why. Love you Alyssa 😘💜💜
Based off of Walk Away by The Script? At first and then it became it's own thing
Warning: mentions of death,season 2 spoilers (if anyone reads it and finds something else please please let me know!) idk i’m lowkey a little drunk rn and don’t know anything but I hope y'all like it!!
Words: 1.7k
Pairing: Javier Pena x Reader
It was early morning when he realized you couldn't sleep anymore. Your head was resting on his chest, over his heart where you could hear it beating, strong and steady, your arm wrapped around his middle, one of your legs thrown in between his. It was his favorite way of sleeping, entangled with you, his arms wrapped tight around you to keep you from shifting off his body. You hoped he knew it was when you felt safest, like the world outside the windows didn't exist. Like no one could hurt him while he was with you. And if he was safe, you didn't care whether or not you were.
You'd been seeing each other for a few months now, Javi always coming back to you, regardless of everything going on around you two. He would come around often at first, quick nights where he'd be gone shortly after getting what he came for, leaving you spent and blissful, which turned into nights sleeping at each other's places, and eventually late night talks over a bottle of whiskey.
He wasn't one to open up easily but you were easy to talk to with your curious eyes and beautiful smiles, the way you'd touch his hand lightly when he was having a hard time finding the right words, reassuring him that everything was okay. You'd lock your fingers together and kiss his knuckles when he came home shaking, fists clenched and words snapping from his mouth before he fully thought them through. Before he realized the weight of them and how they could hurt you. You never held them against him when he was in one of those moods but he'd hold you in his arms for hours after, as a silent apology, kissing your exposed skin lightly.
You should have run when you had the chance. You should have walked away from him that first night he spent at your place. His arms wrapped around you all night, mumbling drunkenly and incoherently, words he'd never tell you sober, words you wished to have been able to hear and understand.
You were too good for him, too innocent. You wanted to save everyone, including him. Your bright eyes willing to help whether or not someone deserved it, whether or not he deserved it. He knew what happened to people who got involved with him. They were liabilities. Something for the cartels to use against him but you didn't care. You always came back to him, you were always there for him.
Even after you were followed home one day. You simply changed your address and told him where to find you, not even bothering to tell him why until he pried deeper. His skin burned as he thought of you being in danger but you merely threw your arms around his shoulders and pressed your lips to his gently, reminding him between kisses you were a lot tougher than you looked. That's when he should have walked away. When he realized he cared too much for you. When the thought of them coming after you made his stomach twist with anxiety and his vision to go red.
You always told him not to worry about you, worry about keeping himself safe instead, but he couldn't help it. You consumed his every thought. Your soft good mornings and pleas for him to be careful made sure he wasn't too reckless, made sure he didn't let his job consume and kill him.
His hands roamed your sides unconsciously, remembering the moment everything changed. The moment he realized he was in too deep and you had him latched onto you whether you wanted or not.
He'd gone to your place after Carrillo was killed, not really sure of where else to go but knowing that he needed you. You were met with desperate sloppy kisses, and too rough hands that had you gasping for air. You knew what brought these episodes on but it felt too good for you to question him.
When he was done and you were both spent, he started to get dressed, unable to look at you. It felt wrong for him to have come here just for sex but he didn't want you to carry this shit on your shoulders. After so long of you spending nights together, your eyes were heavy with hurt but he swallowed hard as he made a move to leave. You stopped him when you took his wrist in both your hands.
"Javi, what happened?" You asked gently, your hand slipping into his and pulling him closer. He went willingly, his self-loathing flaring inside of him. The same self-loathing you looked past to care for him. "Javi?"
"Carrillo's dead. I killed him."
"What?" Confusion flooded your face so he explained everything. Your eyes filled with tears as he told you what happened. His words were hurried, almost as if he was trying to get you to understand, to tell him there was nothing he could have done differently even if he wouldn't believe you. Somehow he ended up on his knees in front of you, grasping your hands tightly in his.
He was silent, waiting for you to say something when you pulled your hands away from his. His heart stopped, hell, the whole world stopped as he waited for you to tell him to leave. For you to walk away from him and leave his life forever. Everyone left at one point or the other, but he didn't think it would feel like this. Like the whole universe was imploding in on itself. He braced for impact, looking away from you and closing his eyes tightly.
Your warm hands cupped his face softly unexpectedly. He flinched at your touch, unworthy of any softness you gave him after what he’d done. But he couldn’t help the soft breath of relief at the kiss you pressed to his forehead. You thumbs brushed his cheekbones but you kept kissing down his nose and then each cheek before you pressed your lips against his in a much gentler kiss than the ones he’d stolen from you earlier.
“Javi, mírame,” you breathed out when you pulled away. He still had his eyes closed, almost afraid that if he opened them, you’d be gone, a mere illusion of his loneliness. He shook his head. “Javi.” Your voice was soft but stern, refusing to be ignored. He opened his eyes slowly, meeting your eyes. They were shining with unshed tears. He swallowed hard and cupped your cheek, trying to catch your tears before they fell. “This was not your fault.”
“Cariño,” he started but you stopped him before he could finish.
“No. you found a lead and you ran with it. That woman killed Carrillo, you were just doing your job. Carrillo was just doing his job. And you blaming yourself takes away all the years that he spent in this fight. You do not get to carry his death on your shoulders, it is not your burden to carry.” Your voice was thick as you spoke over the lump in your throat. “We mourn the dead, we don’t blame ourselves for what happened to them. He died for his country in the hands of a horrible man, Javi. You don’t get to take that from him.”
Your words were harsh but what he needed right now.
“If you care about this man, you will find Pablo Escobar and make him pay for what he did.” Your words cut deep and helped ease some of the blame settling in his stomach.
Something shifted in him then. A realization that he needed you in his life. It wasn’t a matter of what he wanted anymore, it was a matter of not ever losing you. It unsettled him further and he felt the planet itself shift off his axis. Your eyes never left his as the change happened but you must have sensed it because next thing he knew he had his head buried in your neck and your hands running through his hair softly.
He allowed himself to be coddled like a child after a nightmare and it was only then he realized that maybe the planet hadn’t shifted off its axis but had finally settled into its rightful place. You stayed up with him all night, both of you wrapped tightly around each other, refusing to let go of him until he pulled away first. It was the night he should have run away from but turned out to be the night he realized he’d never leave your side again.
“You’re gonna be late,” you mumbled sleepily, breaking him out of his thoughts. His lips curled into a smile as he looked down at you, refusing to let go of him. You’d asked once if it was hard for him to breathe when you were on top of him. He refused to admit that it was the only time he was able to breathe, knowing you were safe in his arms.
“You need to get off first, cariño,” he whispered into your hair. You shook your head and held on tighter to him, your hands trying to wrap under him.
“If I don’t, will you stay with me?” You asked. He knew you didn’t mean it but he flipped you over onto your back anyways, his hands digging into your waist to keep you in place under him. Your eyes widened at the sudden shift but when they settled on him they softened once more, blinking under the sun peeking in through the windows and lighting up his face.
He often wondered if you needed those words. The words that every woman wanted to hear when a hookup became more than just that. But when your eyes met his, he knew those words meant nothing compared to how he felt. He could say them a hundred times and they wouldn’t even compare to how you made him feel. He leaned down and captured your lips in a breathtaking kiss, stealing the air from your lungs.
When he pulled away, he knew that even if he never said those words, you wouldn’t need them. You felt them in every action he did towards you. In every way he proved he loved you without ever saying it.
~~~
Mírame- look at me
Not gonna apologize for this one bc it must be annoying for y'all to hear as well but thank you all for reading. And as always all comments are loved an appreciated!! 💜💜
Tagging the lovelies: @murdermewithbooks @pablopascal @rosamedina92 @hiscyarika @mostly-megan @brittritz @scarlettwitcher @laubeck10 @spacemacandcheese @hdlynnslibrary @daydreamin24-7 @waywardodysseys @dillylila @keeper0fthestars 💜💜
#tipsy me can come up with some decent shit#i hope you all like it!!#idk what it is but pt 2 is gonna be all fluff i swear#my writing#javier peña x reader#javi writing
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find your way (back to me) - chapter eight
Back at it again with another update cause I had to get this chapter down before it left my head. Honestly Em is a hero for giving me this idea bc I had stalled on the fic after Jessica’s escape. But because of their help I actually know a lot more than I even knew in the LAST CHAPTER much less as a whole. Loving the comments so ofc keep them coming cause i need validation.
The process of healing is frustratingly slow and Jessica finds herself lost in the cycle of sleeping, being questioned by officers, seeing Ainsley and occasionally Malcolm, and sleeping again. It’s a small comfort knowing that Malcolm, in all his determination is searching for the man behind all of this. Most of her though just wants him in the room with her, knowing he is safe.
The most frustrating, to her and investigators alike were her memories. She remembers the big picture. There was a wreck while she was traveling to a meeting for Eve’s charity. With the woman gone Jessica had preserved her legacy the best she could. The crash was unexpected. She’d checked Alphonso from the back seat already knowing he was dead. Two paramedics pulled her out of the car, put some kind of oxygen mask on her and she was out. Next came where it blurred. She was held in the dark by two men and they asked her to pick between her life or a stranger’s. No matter how many times she picked herself the other person would die. She was shot first, and then stabbed later.
She didn’t remember other conversations. Colette Swanson was the one to report to her what they found at the construction site. They found the room she was held in, two chairs bolted to the floor facing each other. They found the trail of blood where she had escaped. They found a young man matching the surveillance footage of the paramedic they’d found the day of the wreck. He was beaten to death, likely by his partner though the FBI agent didn’t expand on why.
She’s not shocked. Part of her knew this already.
What tears at her was they found no trace of the other killer nor Freddy in the vicinity. Gil tells her that no trace of blood should be a good thing.
It doesn’t feel like a good thing.
“Ms. Whitly.” She picks her head up from the spot she was staring at, smiling kindly at the doctor.
“Dr. Garcia, I hope you’re not planning to wheel me back for another surgery. Ainsley is getting off soon and she’s bringing Vionelli’s.” The surgeon chuckles warmly shaking her head. In the week she’s been stuck in the hospital Dr. Garcia had been a welcoming bright spot in her boring or traumatizing days. The day she chased away an officer who was getting a little too aggressive while questioning and insisting that she remembered. Waving a clipboard and getting in the face of an armed man, it was a sight that made her laugh no matter how much it hurt her side.
“Actually, I wanted to be the one to tell you that it’s looking like you could go home today.”
“Today?” She sits up a little, newfound energy overpowering the shot of pain that goes through her side at the movement.
“Your infection has cleared up and all of your baselines came through clear. Now you’ll come back in a week to remove the stitches and I want you taking it easy when walking. We’re going to send you home in a wheelchair.” Jessica must have made a face because the doctor gets serious, “I expect you to use it Ms. Whitly. Your physical therapy will be easier if you don’t push yourself too much. No alcohol or other supplements until you finish out your medication.” Jessica hesitates but nods. Anything that can get her past this as soon as possible she’ll agree to. “Well, in that case you might want to tell your daughter to bring a loose set of clothes and I’ll tell the nurses to get the paperwork drawn up.”
“Dr. Garcia?” Her question evades her as soon as she asks. Past conversations echo instead, The knife was two centimeters from nicking the femoral artery. The gunshot wound had been infected, but we caught it early. Your memory will return in time, it’s expected with the combination of anesthesia and your head injury. Yet, not once had the woman made the claim other doctors had. The one that she told herself, you got lucky. “Thank you.”
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After the text it’s Ainsley, Malcolm, and Gil who come to escort her home. It feels like a bittersweet celebration. None of them will let her stay alone, despite her protests and the 3 details they set up along the house. All help is dismissed until further notice, and her home has already been searched five times for any possible cameras or bugs hidden. Gil tried to insist her stay with her but couldn’t fight more when she pointed out that she’d get around easier in her own home than his small apartment.
They celebrate with Vionelli’s, as promised, and sitting at her own table with her family surrounding her almost feels normal. She longs for a drink but her children made sure that all alcohol was removed from the home the second they were told she could come home. For a few split seconds she allows herself to believe this is a normal day. That she doesn’t ache all over, that there aren't several patrols outside guarding each exit of her home, that she doesn’t have the details of 3 days blurred as if she’d taken a few too many pills.
Despite her protests the three of them create a system. Malcolm will stay with her tonight, Gil’s insistence as he hadn’t slept much in 3 days. Gil will switch him tomorrow, Ainsley after that. Even though she tried to deny their pushes, she’s secretly glad to have one of them with her. At least she can be assured one of them is safe at all times.
Much to her dread, Gil and Ainsley eventually leave. They linger longer than they should. None of them really tired enough to stave off their personal demons from the night. Gil gives in when Colette calls, Ainsley long after he is gone but her own detail looks tired and she shouldn’t probably get home.
Jessica makes her way back to her own bedroom. The clothes Ainsley brought are comfortable enough that she can just slide right into bed. Her medicine is slowly dragging her under and she’s grateful for the peace that the familiar setting brings.
“Goodnight mom,” Malcolm smiles at her, the expression not quite matching the worry in his eyes.
“Love you Sunshine.” She says as gently as she can, inordinately calm against the threat of sleep. Her nightmares are no stranger to her. The nickname helps as she watches him relax, even if only slightly.
“Love you too.”
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Jessica wakes again with a gasp sitting up in bed, the pain that echoes through her abdomen making her regret the movement. The nightmare already faded from her as she settles back hissing through her teeth. She squints at her phone laying on her nightstand.
4:26 A.M.
She huffs covering her eyes. She can feel the beginnings of her medicine wearing off. She’s surprised Malcolm hadn’t woken her simply to take some. She peers through the dark spying her son curled in the chair in the corner of her room. He must have fallen asleep there after working on the case for most of the night.
Her chest aches remembering how after Martin she’d find him sleeping almost anywhere but his bed. That chair, specifically, was his favorite place to curl up. A flashlight and book lying abandoned on the floor by his feet.
She experimentally sits up again, slower this time. The pain is much more manageable in the slow, precise movements. As her eyes adjust to the dark she sees a cup sitting on her nightstand along with the bottles of medicine she’s supposed to take. Lying by the glass is a small card, a note hastily written.
Just as you like.
Her chest warms looking over at Malcolm again. The glass is still hot, he couldn’t have prepared it long ago. She tusks but slides the note in her drawer, standing. She suppresses the groan at the ache in her leg, not wanting to wake him when he’d clearly just managed to fall asleep. She grabs the spare blanket draped across the bottom of her bed and covers him. Even in his sleep he looks like he carries the whole world on his shoulders. Grabbing her tea and medicine she exits her bedroom.
She’s not sure exactly where she intended on going. The restlessness is enough to make her wander through the home on a good night. This, this is something else. A sense of dread that can’t seem to leave her chest.
She takes a sip of the tea enjoying the warmth that spreads across her. Her peace is only momentary though.
The tea doesn’t taste like what she drinks.
The taste brings her back twenty years. To Christmas morning with two children bouncing onto her bed excitedly screaming about Santa. To a golden tray loaded up with her favorites. To breakfast in bed. To the tea Martin had prepared for her.
Malcolm didn’t make this.
Panic fills her as she pushes herself through the home, steadying herself on the walls. She bursts into the dining room, looking for the bar cart.
She hears Malcolm screaming in her head.
Don’t drop the cup, it could be evidence.
She needs a drink
You’re not supposed to drink on your medication.
She doesn’t care. Not when she can’t get the taste out of her mouth.
Mother!
The cart is empty. Of course it is. Ainsley herself cleared it out. She has a stash in the kitchen. One she hadn’t touched since Malcolm’s months of silence. One only she knew about.
She grits her teeth using the table as a brace as her leg screams against the rush. She can’t think. Not when the memories are too loud. The good times taste like poison under his gaze, his touch.
She flicks on the light stopping dead in her path at the sight of a figure seated at the island, facing her. The glass slips from her hands spilling across the tile and scattering shards everywhere.
Freddy stares emptily at her. His skin is all too pale. A sharp cut against his throat and blood spilled all over his clothes. They’re the same clothes he’d been wearing when she saw him last. The eyes that had been so kind to her are frozen in choking horror. He probably couldn’t even scream.
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Shattering glass startles Malcolm awake. He's up and aware in a matter of seconds. The bed his mother had fallen asleep in is empty, the medicine he’d left on her nightstand is gone too. He tries to rationalize with himself. She likely woke from a nightmare. Went to look for a drink. He doesn’t need to jump to conclusions.
Her scream sends ice through his veins. He’s taking off after that, ignoring the soreness in his joints from the position he’d slept in.
He never should have let himself fall asleep.
He was supposed to be guarding her.
Now she’s-
“Mom!” He calls out to her. Her screams seem to echo off the walls. He suddenly feels too small, a child searching helplessly for his mother in a crowd of ghosts. “Mom!” He’s closer. She’s still screaming.
He rounds the kitchen to a sight that turns his stomach. His investigative sense tells him to preserve the scene, call 911. But his mother is backed up against the wall, eyes glued to the body meant just for her. He doesn’t give a damn about the glass the cuts his feet to get to her. He lifts her by the elbows pulling her back into the dining room.
“Freddy. It’s Freddy.” She sobs before collapsing on his shoulder.
In that moment, Malcolm freezes. Twenty years, not once did she cry for Martin. Not once did she cry for her family that had been burned up and destroyed. She didn’t cry when he moved away, not when he woke up after being taken by the Junkyard Killer, not when Ainsley confessed to her that she killed Endicott. But she’s clinging to him like her life depends on it, and she’s crying.
All he can do is hold onto her and text Gil.
#prodigal son#gil arroyo x jessica whitly#jessica whitly x gil arroyo#jessica whitly#gil arroyo#malcolm bright#prodigal son AU#gilssica#kidnapping au#kidnapped au#notgonnarememberthis fics#fanfic#yes i updated again#i am anxious and this is a coping mechanism whats good#find your way (back to me)#find your way (back to me) chapter 8
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22&25 with Bucky bc I hate myself and love heartache? Thanks x
22: “You should leave.”
25: “I’m with someone else now… and you know him.”
a/n: ENDGAME SPOILERS! Also, I tweaked a couple of things in the movie so this story could make sense. I hope you like it. sorry if this is shit i kinda think it’s cringy and i wrote it at 4am but I tried to make it angsty
————————-
Bucky wakes to a world of orange.
He’s confused, at first, as he lies in a field of grass, feeling the soft breeze rustle through his hair and send small tremors down his body. He doesn’t quiet remember how he got here or why, just that he feels so at peace just staring at the orange sky.
Wait.
Orange?
Then it all comes flooding back to him like a tidal wave. He sits up in horror, similar to as if he’d just have nightmare, except in this case, his nightmares have actually come true. He remembers it all- the smell of burning flesh, the taste of hot blood in his mouth, the horrendous sounds of clashing swords and broken screams.
Right.
Bucky had been fighting with Steve in Wakanda in an effort to save the world from mass destruction. He’d pleaded and begged for you to stay behind but you’d held your ground, grasping him desperately and telling him that you needed to use your powers for good. He had sighed and kissed you softly, resting his forehead on yours and admitting that he was just afraid that he would lose you.
“You won’t ever lose me.” you’d said, looking up at him with a soft smile.
And you’d been right.
Instead, you lost him. Bucky barely had a chance to react before his legs started to buckle as the world around him faded to dull shades of green and grey, his very essence dissipating into thin air before he could even shout out for you. Instead, he had to watch as you fell to your knees and screamed for him.
But he wasn’t dead.
Was he?
Survival instincts kicked in, prompting Bucky to stand up and quickly survey his surroundings. It looked like he was in a giant never ending field, surrounded by trees, grass and various plants. The urge to come back to you worsened with each step he took, the tears starting to rise up to his eyes as a culmination of pure stress and desperation, but he forced himself to walk further in hopes of a clearing.
But everywhere he looked he only saw blended shades of green, shrubs and the dismally bright orange sky. The shadows appearing behind him mocked him, morphing into reflections of you and driving him to near madness. He couldn’t tell if he was genuinely smelling your shampoo or if he was hallucinating- it didn’t matter to him. Bucky only stopped walking when he reached a supposed clearing, surrounded by a circle of trees. He broke down right then and there when he saw what was there.
A lone flower.
A lily.
Your favorite.
—————————
You toyed with the fragile petals with your fingers, a sad smile appearing on your lips as you watched the little lily sway in the wind. You only diverted your attention when you felt Steve’s presence behind you, his warm arms sneaking around your waist and enveloping you in a hug.
“It’s been almost five years now, Steve.” you whispered quietly, looking up at Steve with teary eyes.
He sighed and nodded, only squeezing you tighter.
“I know, darling… But like Scott said, with Tony’s help, we actually have a chance of bringing everyone else back.”
You let out a broken laugh.
“I know that’s supposed to make me feel better but it’s not…. Steve-”
You took in a shaky breath as he stared at you curiously.
“If… If Bucky comes back, will we, um, what will happen to us?”
Steve stiffened for a brief moment before gently pulling away, lifting your chin up with his finger and giving you a reassuring grin.
“Don’t worry about that right now, darling. We’ll figure it out as we go. But either way, we need to do this. There are billions of lives on the line.”
You nodded and stood up, brushing the tears from your eyes.
“You’re right. Sorry, my problems are not important right now. I’m being selfish.”
Steve shook his head sideways.
“You’re one of the least selfish person I know, (Y/n).”
You smiled sadly.
“Thanks Steve…. I love you.”
Steve reached over and squeezed your hand.
“I love you too.”
——————–
Bucky sat in the clearing of that field for what felt like hours- or perhaps days, he couldn’t tell. Time had no clear indicator in this place. But he just missed you so damn much, the loneliness and guilt was crushing him and rooting him in place.
“Mr.Barnes-”
The familiar voice of the sorcerer caused him to jump up in surprise, only to find Stephen Strange standing in front of him along with a couple of other heroes.
“I believe our assistance is needed.”
And the next thing he knew, Bucky was back on Earth. Albeit, a battlefield, but nonetheless. Back home. Closer to you.
He had to find you.
So he walked through the war zone, pushing through the clouds of dirt and pools of blood, killing any alien with his bare fists and gunfire that was blocking his way.
He had to find you.
And there you were. Standing next to Wanda, summoning fire and killing a whole army of aliens charging from the sky.
“(Y/n)!”
You barely had time to turn around before the mass of muscle and metal collided into you, the sudden mess of long brown hair and the familiar smell of Bucky invading your senses.
“Bucky, I-”
Before you could finish your sentence he was kissing you, and five years ago you would’ve eagerly returned the favour. But instead you found yourself awkwardly staring at Bucky with both eyes open, pushing him away slightly with two hands. He stared at you, bewildered and hurt, as you cleared your throat and avoided his gaze.
“Bucky, I missed you…”
“Apparently not really since you pushed me away. What’s going on, doll?”
That nickname usually made you weak but now it made you grimace, the guilt starting to eat you alive.
“You’ve been gone for five years, Buck. And I… I’m sorry but-”
You let out a shaky sigh.
“I’m with someone else now… and you know him.”
Bucky’s heart stopped beating at that moment, his breath catching in his throat as he tried to process your response. He had lost you and then just found you, only to find out he had lost you again, but to someone else. And apparently, someone he knew.
A loud explosion a few miles away caught both of your attention, prompting you to quickly run after it.
“I’m really sorry, Bucky. Let’s talk about this after the battle, yeah?”
But with Tony’s death and the heavy losses suffered from the battle, there didn’t seem to be any time for him to talk to you after the war. While everyone else celebrated the defeat of Thanos and mourned the loss of Tony Stark, Bucky stood silently in the corner, his heart slowly turning cold and brittle at the realization that you’d moved on.
It was only at Tony’s funeral that you were finally in the same place as Bucky- his heart stopping for a quick moment when he realized you were wearing the black dress that he’d bought you on your second date with him. After the send off of the casket, Bucky quickly ran after you and called your name.
“(Y/n)-”
You stilled, dreading this moment.
“Bucky… Hi. I-I’m sure you want an explanation. I-”
“Baby, are you ready to leave? The babysitter called, she said Lily’s been making a fuss- Oh.”
Steve stopped talking when he saw you in midst conversation with his best friend, a mortified look on your face and pure pain painted across Bucky’s.
“Steve?” muttered Bucky quietly, disbelieved.
“Bucky, please-”
A sudden ripple of anger coursed through his veins.
“You’re with STEVE? My best friend?”
Steve stepped forward with his arms outstretched, trying to calm his friend down.
“Bucky, I know you’re upset-”
“UPSET? I… I’m livid. I was betrayed. By the two people who mattered the most to me!” retorted Bucky, angrily pushing Steve away.
“Bucky please-”
Your strangled voice caught his attention, causing Bucky to pause before calming down with an angry stare. You could practically feel the pain radiating off of him as you spoke.
“I’m so sorry, Buck. But you have to understand, you were gone for five years-”
“Do you love me? Did you ever love me?”
Steve’s anger flared up as he stepped forward protectively, pushing you backwards.
“You should leave.”
You tugged Steve backwards and let out a broken sob at Bucky’s question.
“No, Steve, he needs to stay. I-”
You sighed.
“Of course I did. How could you ever doubt that? It completely broke me when you died, Bucky. I-I know it was just five hours to you but it was five long, hard years for me. I was suddenly left alone in a post apocalyptic world, I lost so many of my friends and I lost you. You died r-right i-in front of my eyes, Buck. And Steve, he… he took care of me. He picked up my broken pieces.”
Bucky’s harsh gaze began to soften as you continued, tears running down your face.
“It took us so long to even get together cause we both felt so guilty. But we needed each other, Buck, and you were gone. One thing led to another and…”
“You got together.” finished Bucky, his voice laced with pain.
He watched as Steve extended a gentle arm towards you, his hand rubbing gentle circles onto your skin. Bucky smiled sadly and bit back his tears, trying to be the bigger person.
“It’s okay, (Y/n). I… I was just surprised. This is all a lot to take in.”
“Yeah, I can only imagine.” added Steve sympathetically.
Bucky sighed.
“Who’s Lily?”
“She’s our daughter.” you added in quietly, wiping your tears away from your face.
“So you still like lilies. That didn’t change about you.”
You let out a broken laugh at his comment. A brief moment of silence passed as Bucky pondered over what to say and how to say it.
“Are you… happy? Both of you?”
The two of you nodded.
“Absolutely.”
“I… I really am, Bucky.”
He just smiled at you the best he could.
“Then that’s all that matters… I’m glad that you two were able to find each other.”
Bucky then turned on his heel and began to walk away, only to be stopped by Steve putting his hand on his friend’s shoulder.
“Wait! Do you… I don’t know, do you want to meet Lily or something? Catch up? She’d love to meet the famous Uncle Bucky for the first time.”
Bucky shook his head sideways.
“Nah. I don’t… I don’t think I’m quite there yet.”
Steve nodded understandingly, the urge to apologize more evident than ever before.
“Bucky, I-”
“It’s okay.” interrupted Bucky, waving away his friend’s apology.
“I’m not mad. It was just a lot to take in. I mean, in a way, it’s great- my best friend and my best gal together. And this is your happy ending, Stevie. I could never take that away from you. The thing you’ve been dreaming about all these decades- a wife, a child, a home life…”
“You’re gonna get that too one day, Buck.”
Bucky grinned sadly.
“I know I will, punk. Just… just take care of her for me, right?”
“I promise I will.”
“Then that’s all that matters.”
And so Bucky watched as his best friend left, a quick arm being wrapped around your waist as the two of you drove away in a bright red car. A bitter smile returned on his face when he realized that the two of you had gotten your happy endings. Bucky strolled across the lake before taking out the lily that was in his coat pocket for the funeral and dropping it into the water.
Now it was gone, just like you.
—————
a/n: yikes what the fuck was that ending ugh im so sorry this is so bad but i wanted to write this up before i slept and it’s 4:40am now ew so sorry
–> read my other blurbs here
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Sanders Sides Disney Zombies AU Prompt
Paring: Prinxiety
A/N If you haven't watched this yet you'll probably be confused. This has been on my mind for a long time and since I haven't seen it I wrote a prompt myself!
This r e a l l y feels like a shortened version of the whole thing, I've never done prompts before. Please comment and tell me your thoughts on this!
Roman is a human and both him Virgil and hate each other
Roman is actually pretty rich, everything was given to him since he was little, he’s popular, and practically lived the life of luxury
However behind all that glamor, being known as the top performing actor, people in Seabrook will have expectations. Especially his parents, who need him to be the best of the best for their family legacy!
So he hides behind a mask of confidence every once in a while to blend in with he crowd or if absolutely necessary, almost a whole week or more.
Virgil’s life isn’t too fancy. The death of a close family friend of his plus moving to a new school caused him to have social anxiety and a shy but aggressive exterior. No one really talked to him
His only friend being Logan, but they only hang out during school. It’s doesn’t matter though, Virgil prefers that being a lone wolf is the play it safe rout
Virgil sees Roman as snobby and full of himself, Roman sees Virgil as the kid who doesn’t really care at all about anyone too much
They torment each other almost every chance they get by giving sly comments in the halls or annoyingly teasing one another constantly. They honestly can’t stand each other
The day the apocalypse starts, Roman gets bitten and was lucky enough to be able to live on the other side of the barrier, one of the dilemmas is that he can’t perform anymore and feels devastated
Virgil assumes that Roman was able to escape before the apocalypse hit and thought he’d never see him again. Which he was ok with, he hates him but it’s not like he wanted him dead
Romans taken from his home and has to live on the opposite side of the border. He meets Patton and the two easily become close buds over one of them accidentally being hit in the head by a football
First day back at Seabrook and Roman is nervous as hell, he can already feel the odd stares at the back of his neck.
The days he’s back at Seabrook Roman can finally see his family regularly again.
He confronts his theater friends and they feel awkward and don’t know how to react to Roman being undead
They decide to take separate paths since “hey man, your a zombie now and things aren’t the same as they used to be” (I like to think that Remy is the ‘leader’ of this group)
Let’s just say Roman decides to stay with Patton for the rest of the year
Virgil and Roman cross paths again and Virgil’s immediately shook like “Holy crap! The guy whose constantly annoying me is undead.” And it crosses his mind that Roman basically died but was luckily able to stay alive again
He doesn’t know how to feel about this
Having forgot about the emo nightmare, Roman stands there awkwardly stumbling over his words
In this moment Roman feels like a complete idiot and leaves immediately
Noticing a big switch on Romans overall mood, Virgil eventually finds him and decides to ask him about it. Partly bc he’s curious and mainly bc he’s worried about him. Not that he’ll admit it or anything
When they talk, Virgil is told the man feels depressed about how different, now, his life is
It felt nice to have someone to vent to
Virgil tries his gosh darn best to comfort the man bc he’s bad with people and realizes that Roman is actually a decent guy
Roman grins, feeling a little more confident. Then thanks him for his efforts
Patton introduces Roman to his friends at lunch (It could be the canon characters or other people) and they all get along well
Having an ego boost for once in a long time decides to try out for theater once again! Still having the burning passion of the spotlight dwelling inside him!
Virgil overhears the conversation with Roman and the teacher
He surprised to hear that Roman is rejected from the club. Reason being is that Zombies aren’t simply allowed and that was that
He does his best to reason with them, mentioning his Z-band and confirming that nothing will happen
It fails and Roman leaves with emptiness in his heart. Performing is his life and without it he doesn't know what to do next
Virgil’s pissed. Sure Roman was an a-hole in the beginning but he realizes that he’s struggling more than ever. Roman is still himself inside and they don’t see that
Flashback to Patton briefly seeing Roman talking to Virgil in what seems like a serious conversation. He assumes that they’re good friends now and reconciles to him about his friends recent gloomy behavior
They talk for a bit about how in the world to bring his mood back up and Virgil has an idea to convince the theater department.
He convinces Logan to help, he doesn’t get much of it, but it’s help nonetheless
It works! Roman is allowed to be in production for their next play! But for only one time to see how he does or if anything happens
It’s a small role but Romans still a happy bean
He goes to Patton, talking fast and all excited. Being like “I got a role! I don't know how or why but they let me have a small part! They must’ve changed their minds or something”
Patton’s laughs, and casually tells Roman the truth. “Heh, well you better thank Virgil for that one!”
Roman gives him an unconvinced look since they don’t know each other. Patton tells him everything and Roman flushes. “Omg he actually wanted to help me?!”
He hugs his dad-like friend, over-dramatically thanks him, and heads for Virgil next
The actor talks to him and thanks him for everything. Feeling like he owes him the world (or does something else overdramatic to thank him)
They both hang out a lot more and become really close friends throughout the many months
* After a while Roman falls first
* The more they roam the halls with each other at their sides, the more odd stairs they receive
He gets anxious, Virgil hating that he’s the center of attention, just wants to crawl into a hole of darkness
Roman notices this and pulls him out of the crowd and into the Zombie Safe Room
THEY SING “SOMEDAY” TOGETHER. DO YOU NOT KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE THAT IMAGE IN MY HEAD
They become closer!
Tis the day of Romans performance! Virgil bites his nails, feeling nervous for him
After the first act Virgil congratulates him, feeling absolutely proud
Roman uses his Z-band to help him have the most perfect performance he’s ever done! Patton reluctantly agrees to hack it for him, having full trust in his friend
It backfires and he ends up almost hurting Logan
Virgil tries to calm Roman down, but he’s pulled away from him before he can do anything
He’s locked up for further investigation. After almost 6 months of inspection, Romans let go but is under careful surveillance
It was a painful 6 months
Virgil reflects during this period and finds that he has feelings for him as well. He realizes how much he doesn’t want to lose him. He’s never felt this way before.
First time seeing Patton after so long, he practically gets trampled on by the crying father friend, and hang out for a while
First time in seeing Virgil after so long, Roman gives him the tightest hug in the world, and whispered softly in his ear. “I missed you so much dearest...”
A few days role by with Roman being constantly checked on during brunch and lunch period
Patton was finally able invite the both of them to the zombie hang out party to celebrate and were able to sneak there
Roman plans to confess his feelings there
A bit of some awesome partying later (insert cute platonic moxiety moments here) they go to the second floor where Roman describes as the ‘best part’ of the whole place
They sing Someday ballad version together!
By the end of their song Roman confesses and they both slowly lean in, but since It’s past curfew a startling crash pulls them apart. It was the sound of the police evacuating the building
Before Roman could leave, Virgil desperately and quickly grabs onto his shirt, giving him a pleading gaze
Roman lovingly connects both their foreheads together to try to calm him. “Don’t worry, I’ll be back for you. I promise.”
It’s been almost two weeks without a word from him, Virgil’s worried sick of course. He grows, tired, confused, and anxious since Roman hasn’t answered any of his texts or calls.
There’s a knock on his front door
His parents open it and call to Virgil saying a friend wants to see him.
Being tired and grumpy, Roman stands on the other side of the entrance. His mouth opens agape at the completely human looking Roman in front of him
Virgil’s obviously still mad at him for practically avoiding Virgil for about two weeks but he makes it up to him by taking him to a frozen yogurt place as their first date.
He explains how he able to have Patton hack his Z-band to change him temporarily.
Virgil soon finds out the whole human look thing is a surprise for Virgil so they can go out as official in public
They have a great time! But looking closer into the actors once original structure, he feels bad for how he’s treated and assumed the worst of him in the past. Virgil tells him this.
He wonders how their relationship would’ve even started at all, if Roman was never bitten
Truths were spilled about the opinions of one another, and apologies were made
Roman tells him he is forever banned from performing or going anywhere near the theater club. But he’s had time to accept this and appreciates what he has now
After the date, the actor quickly escorts Virgil home, late at night. Almost in hurry to change back to normal so he doesn’t get caught. After all he’s on a strict curfew schedule
He feels really bad for having to leave him right after their first date but he plans to make up for it the next-
Virgil looks around and determinedly pulls Roman at the side of his house, out of sight from anyone. His partner stumbles in confusion
He grabs the collar of Romans shirt and pulls him down to his height. Pressing a firm kiss on his lips. Both men melting instantly and relax in each other’s embrace.
Roman curls his arms around his partners waist to pull him closer, as Virgil wraps his arms around Romans neck
Roman pulls away, chuckling. “You know, I’ve been wanting to do that for a while now.” He smiles. Virgil buries his head into the taller mans shoulder, taking in what’s left of his scent
This is officially one of the happiest moment of their lives
They part ways with the biggest smiles on their faces going from ear to ear
The next couple months go by with Virgil anxiously accepting himself in Patton and Romans group, strengthening their love for each other, and proving to themselves that society doesn’t control who they are in life
#prinxiety#sanders sides#roman sanders#romantic prinxiety#virgil sanders#patton sanders#logan sanders#highschool au?#thomas sanders#my writing#sanders sides writing
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Oh Shit it's P5 headcanon time
#Persona 5#akira kusuru#ann takamaki#yusuke kitagawa#ryuji sakamoto#Morgana#p5#headcanons#i'll have more for the other babes when i get further#i only just met goro and i hardly know nijima#and sae can fight me out behind the arby's#and i feel bad for the coffee man but he's very face value for me
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this is overdue.
so it will probably be long winded. and there’s so much to say that I’m not even sure where to start. but here we go.
he says he took his new job in January. I wouldn’t know, I’m so bad at time. and even if I wasn’t, I bet I’d try to forget. I remember feeling so sad and yet also extremely proud of my man for stretching himself to get to have the kind of fulfillment he needs. but as I got to see more of what we would look like if I stayed with him, my sad turned sore and I was beyond disheartened. all the patterns we built to maintain us were stripped away one by one and I got my ass beat. I felt abandoned and I started to become mean and my will to live suffered drastically.
and the last time that I’d seen him, I couldn’t honestly be sure that I would even see him again. because I was there in front of him and still feeling so abandoned and sour. and this time I knew that there was going to be some time before I could just hop on a plane to the other side of the country to see him on odd days that are hard to be there but he’s married so there goes any sort of conventional anything and either I’m there or I don’t see him. logistically, I knew it would be even longer than it had been the time before. and emotionally, I thought I was going to tap out anyway. no matter how much I knew I loved him.
and then the whole world watched another black man lose his life for nothing. and of course I have my theories about why everyone paid such close attention this time but, it’s been a nightmare. I’m not gonna say too much about the personal impact things like this have on a black person, but it is exhausting to have to constantly affirm to other people that your life fucking matters. so my personhood is running on empty. my heart is drained. and then me and my boyfriend share an escalated exchange of thoughts and I become slowly certain that there isn’t anything left to fight for.
here’s the smallest bit about that. when we met, it’s because I was looking for a sponsor. and when he withdrew my sponsorship he said it’s because he didn’t want to pay for my love. and I do love him, and I didn’t know how much I would mean that when I said okay but I said okay bc I knew I meant it. I chose him over the money that I signed up to whore myself out for even though I needed it. and ultimately, after a conversation I wasn’t ready for but couldn’t help but to provoke, I felt like I would never be esteemed the way I esteem him. but for me it isn’t even a matter of love or not, it’s a matter of life or not. and when my thoughts were organized enough to pour them out and ask for a resolve, he got defensive instead. and I had to dig deep if there was going to be anything left to fight for.
I’m actually still attempting to work out a number of things about that escalated exchange, but it’s in private now. I know that there are things he isn’t going to be able to understand within the hour of me saying so, but I think I know he wants to. and I know I love him and I know at what depth. my thoughts here are scrambled and incomplete so I will have to decline to further comment.
but I’m writing now because I don’t know what switch flipped and who turned it off to begin with but somehow I feel like I got my boyfriend back. I don’t know which thing almost stole us but I hope to know how to fend it off if the next time it comes back. I’m writing now because I’m so obsessed with him and I have butterflies again. I have the fight I’m gonna need if we’re gonna make this thing work. guys, hes coming to see me next week. I didn’t even ever consider that he would think about it. and I’m not actually even gonna believe it until he’s in my arms but, I feel so humbled. I don’t still feel left behind or unsure if I chose the right thing. I’m so in love.
and this is where I want to stay.
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