#no dragonwatch spoilers ive only read like 2 books

[zannolin]

[is listening to secrets of the dragon sanctuary] i'm actually curious to see if the whole dragon brother thing will pop back up in dragonwatch. like you would THINK. in the series about dragons. there might be a real dragon brother. but we shall see....

[jesussavedevenme]

Holding On

Sorry for the long wait iv e been swamped in school and have been sick. This is a one shot kind of continuing Kendra's thoughts in chapter 2 afraid to trust. This takes place after dragonwatch book 2 so DO NOT READ unless your ok with spoilers.  A bunch of comfort and fluff. Darker than what I would usually write but here we go Chapter 5: Holding on Kendra felt like she was going to drown. She just couldn't breathe. She felt trapped in her own body. She had been captured by Ronodin a  week ago and now she sat in a cold damp cell. Her body ached due to the daily beatings she received. The worst part of these beatings were the person beating her. Her brother Seth, now apparently Ronodin's apprentice. The shock  of this fact caused her to want to scream. She bit her fist instead knowing that screaming would only cause more beatings. Memories of Seth comforting her or them messing around, made her heart ache. His mischievous smile, and corny jokes. His stupid plans that always turned out in the end. Seth protecting her like he always wanted to. What hurt even worse was that he didn't have any memory of this, of her. He truly believed she was a monster. That Ronodin was good. She had no more tears but she felt worse than before. She felt like she was being crushed by the memories and the thoughts. She was terrified. She knew that it was her fault. ' You stupid, excuse for a girl.' She told herself. ' You're an ugly, disgusting person. Everyone is going to die and it's all your fault. You were too scared to turn the key and now Seth is suffering. You really are a monster.' Her thoughts continued in this cycle, Each one feeling like a hot knife cutting into her. At times they would become too much and she would slam her head against the wall.  At some point she curled on the floor and fell into a troubled sleep. †††† Bracken was being led down a hallway after being beaten by Ronodin. This time he wasn't alone, though. Ronodin had an apprentice, someone Bracken had never expected, Seth Sorenson. Seth had always been a good boy. Maybe a little mischievous, but good. What had happened, what caused this change? Bracken noticed dimly that he was being led down a different hallway than usual. As he pondered this they stopped and shoved him into a cell. This cell was bigger than the old one an seemed brighter. It had 2 cots instead of one. He turned around to examine the rest of the cell. As he did, his eyes were forced shut as they were assaulted with an unnatural brightness. A light on a whole different spectrum. The light of a fairykind. Brackens heart pounded in his chest as he waited for his eyes to adjust. Praying, that by some miracle, he was wrong that it wasn't her, He opened his eyes. His heart felt as if it was being ripped out of his chest at the sight he saw. Kendra lay, curled in a ball in the far left corner, on the cold cell floor. He could see oozing cuts and bruises on her arms and the part of her face that he could see. Her eyes were red and puffy, an obvious sign that she had been crying. He moved to crouch next to her, letting out a breath he didn't know he had been holding at the sight of her breathing. Out of the corner of his eyes, he noticed something that disturbed him greatly, there was blood on the wall. Looking back down at Kendra, he noticed the hair on the back of her head caked with blood. Moving her hair gently, he checked the wound. It was shallow and didn't seem to have any stone lodged in it. What really upset him was the fact that, based off the positioning and shape of the wound, it was obviously self inflicted. He knew for a fact Ronodin caused enough pain, why on earth would she inflict more? Pushing the thoughts away for the moment, he gently lifted Kendra bridal style, trying not to move her too much. Bracken ignored his protesting muscles as he moved to lay her on one of the cots. Once getting her situated ,he moved to sit on the opposite cot, sighing deeply as he saw bleeding bite marks on her hands. When she woke up, he was going to talk to her about this. Make her realize that things weren't bad enough for her to hurt herself. They would never be bad enough. Learn about what happened with Seth and what had driven her to do this. But for now he was going to let her sleep. That was the best medicine for her at the present moment †††† The first thing Kendra noticed as she began to wake up was the fact that her head hurt terribly. She kept her eyes closed not wanting to wake up. The cot was surprisingly comfortable. That thought made her eyes fly open as she sat straight up. She immediately regretted it as she was hit with dizziness and a throbbing head. Wincing, she began to bring her hands toward the back of her head. " Your head will probably hurt for a while." Said a deep, soothing, male voice, laced with sadness. Yelping, Kendra jumped backwards, effectively falling off the cot. A strong hand grabbed her arm and kept her from hitting the ground as hard. She pulled her arm forcefully out of his grasp and tried to run in the other direction. She felt the strong hands once again grab her arms, this time spinning her around to face him. She squeezed her eyes shut as she struggled and squirmed. Desperate to escape his grasp. All she could see was Ronodin's evil, twisted face. The grip tightened as the man spoke once again. " Kendra, stop! Look at me. Its Bracken!" At his words she immediately stopped struggling and opened her eyes to look at him. She saw his silvery hair, slightly longer than before. And his deep blue eyes that looked at her sadly. She stared at him in disbelief. She had wanted to see him again for so long, though preferably under different circumstances. He released her upper arms and gave a short, humorless laugh, " We have got to start finding better ways to meet up." He said as if reading her mind. Then, blushing, she realized he had been. " Are you ok?" she asked softly, surprised at how weak her voice sounded. She knew it was a stupid question, they were in a prison, of course he wasn't ok. Her reasoning was selfish and she hated herself for it, but she wanted to hear that she wasn't alone in her misery. That someone else felt just as horrible. Bracken gave a deep sigh before answering. " Physically, I'm just bruised. Mentally, I'm tired. More tired than I think I have ever been. I wanted to protect you. To keep you as far away from this mess as possible."  He moved to sit on one of the cots as he finished. " I'm ok. It's not your fault I was captured. It's mine. " She said moving to sit beside him. She was internally beating herself up over the fact that he blamed himself for her stupidity. She noticed darkly the thing she had wanted now only caused more pain. Bracken looked her in the eyes. The sadness and determination, she saw startled her. "No, Kendra you're not." He answered firmly, he continued before she could protest. "This," he said, indicating the scabs on her hand in the shape of bite marks and the wound on her head. " Is not ok. Why would you hurt yourself like that? Things aren't that bad Kendra." Kendra couldn't bring herself to look at him. She honestly hadn't meant to hurt herself or him. She was just trying to make the pain stop. "I didn't mean to." She said quietly, her voice quavering " the thoughts, the voices, they all became too much. I had to make it stop b-but I didn't know h-how. I f-felt so alone. I wan-wanted to scream, but I couldn't b-because I knew they would beat m-me     a-again" Kendra finished choking on sobs as she talked struggling to hold herself together. She felt his strong arms wrap around her a pull her to him in an embrace. She allowed herself to melt into him, sobbing into his shirt. Letting all the pain, fear, and sorrow pour out of her. She drew comfort from Brackens silent rocking. Glad that he wasn't trying to fix it, he was just being there. Just letting her cry. A while later, how long she didn't know, Kendra pulled away, having cried all her tears. This time, however, she felt like the world had been lifted from her shoulders. She muttered a small thank you as she stared at his now soaked, shirt. His fingers lifted her chin so she was looking him in the eyes. " I'm always here for you Kendra. Promise me something. Promise me you will hold on. Hold on just a little while longer. Because I promise this pain  won't last forever. If you ever feel that way again come and talk to me. I promise you are never alone." He hugged her again," promise me." He said. "I promise" Kendra answered, relaxing in his hold.  Feeling better than she had in a long while. she would still have bad days, but this time, she knew she wasn't alone. She had found a small island to wash up on. A refuge from the storm. Someone to hold on to her when she couldn't hold on herself. And in that moment she new she was going to be just fine That's chapter 5 I will write the 2 part one eventually at the moment I have to step away from it. This is EXTREMELY IMPORTANT if you EVER feel like this please find help. Talk to someone. If you can't find anyone you are more than welcome to talk to me. I will do everything in my power to help you or find you some one who can.