#no bc my bestie's family surprised her today

[merinate]

im so fucking jealous

[speakofthedebbie]

by popular demand (re: one person) some radioapple fic recs!! (i hope thats what you meant lol most of the fics i read are just radioapple)

Bedtime Rituals to Try out Before the Next Angelic War by @miribalis

just yes. thousand times yes. so basically my boy luci has some sleep troubles and that somehow leads to a qpr with al look its been a while ok just read it

Managerial Liberties by the same fella

these two tags explain it pretty well

something that sticks out to me about this is that charlie is actually (reasonably) cold to adam and like. im actually surprised with how little ive seen that. i mean i dont think id be exactly buddy-buddy with my besties killer either. only 3 chaps as of writing but already looking to be a radioapple classic

im not sure if its meant to be read as such but it kinda feels like a squeal to bedtime rituals in a way (edit: not meant to be read as such, just the same vibe)

devils don't fly (don't expect me not to fall) by @corgiss

also just yes. basically a really not cool joke evolves into a blossoming romance because why wouldnt it. (man if i had a nickel for every radioapple fic that had a masquerade that was sabotaged by the vees- *gets shot bc i cant mention osas yet*)

i’ll hold you close (i’ll stay the course) by the same fella

the entire time i was just going "yas king! put that egotistical flatscreen in his place!!". basically luci reminds the overlords who he is and vox shows he can be more of a threat than he lets on.

ykw fuck it just the entire series (i didnt mention i would give anything to not give a shit (but i do) and my perfect rock bottom (my beautiful trauma) because the first one sounded a lil too angsty and ive gotten enough of that from other sources [pointedly glares at Quietly, It Slips Through Your Fingers, Love {also coming up later!}] and the second is (mostly) smut and ive been trying to step back from that because "ive seen worse" isnt a valid excuse for that torture actually)

Of Saints and Sinners by the forever amazing @morningstarwrites!! (if you see this i have a serious question: is this your first time ever writing a fic? because how do you get so much right the first time- [not even beginners luck could explain this level of skill])

i could sing its praises until my death bed but ill hold off so i can explain whats happening. basically after burning down a meeting room several times, luci and al make a deal ("not a deal!", luci laments to the void): they will attempt to be civil and maybe even friendly, and by the end luci will owe al a favour. whats the favour? read it yourself dammit! seriously, 10/10, i am foaming at the mouth till friday (depending on how this goes, that might be tomorrow or today)

Quietly, It Slips Through Your Fingers, Love by Starlit_Rainfall (no tumblr in sight, so AO3) (i. urgfgh. what happened. i was just smiling over the fluff while crossing to go to school. where did it go. where did it gooooo)

if thats anything to go by, the last few chapters have been rough. the fluff feels so far away that i cant even explain what happens. luci was waxing poetic about swimming in maple syrup for al, i remember that much. also emily is there (fallen) tho we havent seen her in a sec. if you read it, warning for the gut punch of angst that starts chap 32 "She/Her" (though the chapter before that, "Should Alastor Know By Now?" ends pretty rough too)

Freely We Serve by @romanaxe

i dont remember how i managed to stumble upon this but im having a great time. basically alastor is a new sinner fresh in hell (but time doesnt matter and the whole cast is still here) and thinks "what better way to gain power than be the personal assistant of the heartbroken king of hell!" features a 6(?) year old charlie and a morally dubious lilith (also i loved eepy al X3)

A Family Forged in Hellfire by Green_Ghostwriter (once again, no Tumblr, so AO3)

this ones a bit newer (10 chaps), is so far mostly exposition and the slowburn pot hasnt even been put on the stove, but as just a hazbin fic in general i see the potential. basically its a 1920s au where heaven decides little charlie doesnt deserve to be raised in hell and is sent to earth with a "foster" family where her actions in life will determine witch realm she will return to after death. her "parents", al and minzy, are given false memories so they can claim the girl as their own and gee i wasnt kidding when i said it was a lot of exposition. erm honestly explaining anymore would tech be spoiling so go read it!

The Red Thread That Binds Us by @scun-gilli

{{future me prefacing this by saying i have no idea where i was going with yesterdays thought process, all you need to know from it was im on chapter 27. also scungilli your comment is making me very worried 😟 well theres no mcd tag so im sure itll fine, right? RIGHT, SCUNGILLI??}}

basically its a king x kings guard au where al and luci grow up together and only grow closer after a. certain life event for al (its fine guys trust :)) [she said, like a liar]) then al is sent of for royal guard training school (ik its not called that i forgor 😭) but dw he comes back. just watch out for graphic depictions of injuries (i think thats this fic) angst and a sneaky eve bc radioapple fics are allergic to happiness (or maybe im not looking hard enough lol) (also im really tempted to make the friendship bracelets they had 👀)

somewhere down the line by kj_crwm (AO3 link)

this one starts off as human!alastor/lucifer but by the middle(?) its just regular radioapple. basically al is encountered by luci while finishing off a job who agrees to keep quiet. luci just keeps on showing up, reveals hes the devil to which al us just like "lol ok" and eventually they get in a relationship (ooh lala 👀) but they break up after saying some hurtful things to each other (oh nono 👀) with luci promising al they will never cross paths again. if you watched the show then well. you know that doesnt happen 😂 most human!al radioapple have al summon him (no hate to them) so this was an interesting change of pace

cannot stress it enough but this is a WORKING list i WILL be coming back to it bc these are purely the fics i could think if off the top of my head. IN FACT, if any of you have radioapple fics you love, SEND THEM THE FUCK IN! i am one person whos only been in this fandom for 4 months, and reading fics/shipping radioapple even less, theres bound to be some ones i missed that you think are Worthy™️! and if theyre nsfw then at the very least it shouldnt be the main focus

EDIT: so sorry anyone who reblogged this before had to see the disgusting unedited version. literally just found out that tumblr doesnt apply edits to reblogs. what the fuck

[science-lings]

Being annoying about each option under the cut

1- Ryunosuke has no other pictures of his bestie's face except for the one of his 'corpse' and that is Fucked Up, which is why I love it. this hc is based on the fact that during my playthrough I looked at the picture so many times bc I missed him immediately. Anyway 1-2 was the worst day of his life and the moment where he was given the photo for the first time really stuck with me.

2- They get to switch off being each other's judicial assistants and they both get to be different flavors of transmasc, I think it would be fun for them. Would they have to attend classes at Yumei to even be considered lawyers? who knows the point is they do it together and are like those cats that bond together and get sad when they get separated.

3- If they are in the same room together that sword is being switched back and forth several times, 'I think it matches your outfit today' or 'I'm on my period I shouldn't be in possession of a deadly weapon' or 'you said in the custody agreement that I get it on weekends' etc etc etc... Though it tends to go with Ryunosuke when they are separated for long periods of time. That sword is symbolic of so much gay shit in these games what's a little more.

4- my guy talks about 'the look' in Ryunosukes eyes so much during the last case, what are you looking into his eyes for? Heterosexual reasons? sure... (also 'fancy meeting you here' that is a pick-up line, you're in a prison, not a bar) Anyway his feelings towards Ryunosuke are complicated and he's so mad that at least one of the feelings in the emotional cocktail is something like attraction)

5- There's that disaster lesbian thing going on but also the situation was pretty stressful but one day she will wake up and it will hit her that her friend was still very interested in her even after she knew it was her in the disguise.

6- Sholmes keeps trying to refer to himself as 'the root of all evil' and how he's 'drawn to the darkness', he's trying so hard to be edgy but he's a six-foot-tall lanky blond man who is dramatic in the silly way and drapes himself over Ryunosuke at every opportunity. Either he's trying to build some kind of reputation or he wants to appeal to the local goth milf populace (Sithe and Tusspells) or even the reaper himself (there's some messy ex energy going on over there...)

7- I need Phoenix to inherit Karuma, he knows a bit about it but he doesn't make a big deal about it. He does have a few prosecutor friends who know the blade and are so annoyed that he's not super proud to own it. Also it's funny to me if the only family that Phoenix knows are a couple of victorian lawyers that haunt him. I think they should watch over him and be a little horrified. Ryunosuke was excited when he was intending to be a performing arts student as a fellow drama kid but it doesn't surprise him that he chose to become a lawyer. It's in his blood.

8- You cannot tell me Ryunosuke didn't want to fling himself off of that boat every night he was stuck in the room he thought Kazuma was killed in. He just didn't want to ruin Susatos trip to England by leaving her alone and he goes into a depression when she leaves for Japan, going so far as to avoid looking at the photo the 221b fam took before she left because it made him sad, which gets put up every time by Sholmes who Gets It. Meaning that he went up to the Naruhodo consulting agency regularly to check up on him. I like to think Sholmes was genuinely worried during the months he spent banned from the courtroom and without his weirdgirl who he bonded with through his best friends 'death'.

9- Wagahai is a good kitty, she can tell who the most depressed person in the building is and follows them around, sometimes Ryunosuke has a nightmare and wakes up with a cat right up by his face.

10- Ryunosuke starts the Naruhodo family tradition of not talking about their personal lives to people they care about and making their own little patchwork family for themselves. Practically all we know about his past is that he's afraid of doctors and studied English from a young age. And then like three months after going to a new country and meeting new people he's just like 'neat this is my family now :)' there is something going on there I swear. I have many conflicting ideas about what it could be specifically though.

[caramelstarlight]

Hi! I really like your works, I’ve just been too shy to send in anything. If your taking prayers right now, maybe a Tighnari x reader, where reader is Alhaitham’s sibling and can be described as the Akademiya’s “crazy lady” always coming up with insane/crazy theories and projects, will rant about topics that even leave the Sages scratching their heads, but still highly respected. People are really surprised when they learn that Tighnari and the reader are dating and Alhaitham's sibling. (sorry if it's a lot) I understand if your busy and not taking prayers at this time.

✅ /⭐️ Yeahh bestie I gotchu. Prayer is accepted!!

(Points to you for being a person who didn’t use anonymous xd! They can be so rare sometimes.)

Gonna make us Rtarawhist or whatever. Ngl I’m kinda in genshin as a character. Aka Layla. I used to have a mini Cryo vision and I like swords the best. My name is similar spelling to layla but has the same way of pronunciation.

Illuminating the Flora

(F reader/lil sis of Alhaitham x Tighnari)

(Characters: Tighnari, F Y/N, Alhaitham, Layla, Cyno, Nilou, Collei) (Hydro vision, Sword) (Healer / Attacker)

Sypnosis:Female reader who loves coming up with Theories that are beyond understandable to anyone else beside them(Al-Haitham excluded prob????) meets her partner. Fluff with fighting(Extroverted reader, they would be rambling on about their theories so they’d be social-?)

Story under cut! (Slight angst bc of fighting???) (Can be read as G/N if you ignore the Al Haitham calling you his sister.) (Keeping this in mind that it’s Rtawahist)

“Heyy Layla!” You said as you waved to her excitedly. Going towards the sleep-deprived woman. Holding a few pieces of paper as she saw you while near the fountain. (The one in her hangout where you meet!) She’d wave silently interested in what’s you come up with today. She and her other half found it interesting of what your brain could think of so quickly. It may not make a lot of sense to them but they see how happy you are so they don’t dare to ruin it.

“What’s you come up with this time Y/N?” She’s ask yawning in between her sentences. Having another all-nighter… placing herself on the fountains edge. Being careful to not get herself wet. You mimicked what she did before explaining what you had come up with.

“you see, if the stars and planets are made of dust, shouldn’t water in the space make them grow or dissolve? Especially the sun! It’s blazing hot! It’s worse than traveling to the desert sometimes.” You’d question yourself trying to come up with an answer as she laughed quietly. “I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t grow or dissolve. I don’t think they’d really be affected by the water.” A few talks with Layla seemed to help you with your theories and projects that you could do. Wondering if others could agree with your theories. You may be young but your mind is always head of your years. Same goes for Al-Haitham. maybe it runs in the family…

“I’ll be off Layla! Thanks for helping me sort my thoughts out.” You’d say. Waving goodbye as she went to her class. Your next class is about Zodiacs. What makes people them in a sort of way, it is believed that your birth month changes you slowly but helpful in the process.

Seeing him in the class brought you great joy. He was always early to his classes and you happen to share two classes. You took your seat as your gaze lingered on him for a bit of time. Before you turned your head away and back to the front. (Zodiacs and about plants like the Nilotpala lotus, such as why they only bloom at night or time sensitive ones.)

—After class— (idk what they learned ;-;)

“Tighnari!” You’d say as you catched up to him leaving the classroom. He stared at you with a smile before turning his head back towards his neutral view. You two turned into a different area. Seemingly no one was nearby. So they shouldn’t hear the conversations. (Someone’s gonna hear and it’s gonna be like Alhaitham)

He’d hold you gently, taking in your scent from your hair for a few moments as he wrapped his tail around you. “I heard you came up with another theory. I’d be keen on hearing it sometime before you forget it.” He’d joke, knowing you’d move from it quickly.

“Maybe later…? I just want to relax with the free-time we have today.” You’d tell him. Enjoying his warmth and presence. He lowered his ears and gazed at you lovingly. Silently telling you that he also wanted to do so. He gave you a little peck on the cheek as focused on you. Looking at what you had chosen to wear today.

A similar outfit to Layla but more adorned with jewels symbolizing wishes and more based on daylight. You always wore a different outfit with a new combo. It was refreshing to you and fun, it didn’t cost much as you had your brother getting what you wanted. (Dw you don’t buy much-)

You enjoyed the time silently as Tighnaris ears perked. Alerting the both of you, as he lowered an raised them. Hearing someone coming. But it was too late till they saw you both. It was your big brother, the scribe.

You both quickly departed from one another. Both blushing brightly as he looked with a slightly amused expression. “Al- al Haitham-?!” Tighnari stuttered, hoping he would keep a secret for him. You’d look away and towards a wall in embarrassment.

“You never told me you were dating. But I suppose my little sister always keeps her secrets hidden.” Al-Haitham said as he turned you around to not face the wall. “H-hey! I have my own life too y’know! You don’t need to be a know-it-all about me just because I’m your little sister!” You’d retaliate back to him. Not thinking about your choice of words. Whisper-shouting to him as Tighnari malfunctioned.

“Your siblings?!” He’d whisper shout at the both of you as you and him nodded. Realizing not many knew you were related and just thought you had the same last name but different families. (Like so many ppl can have the last name Takahashi bro- I have seen so many ppl with it)

“Oh you didn’t know-? I thought you did-?!” You’d say back at Tighnari. Hoping the whisper shouts wouldn’t gather your friends or strangers.

“No I didn’t!” He’d say as Tighnari held one of your hands. “Realizing it now I should’ve known sooner… same last name and age.” He’d sigh, lowering his ears and tail in dissapointment.

“Hey it’s okay! Not many people know…”’your state trying to cheer him up as Al-Haitham talked to him about being your boyfriend. He had trust in him that he would take care of you. Walking away from the area and onto the outside / entrance / threshold of the akademiya.

(After announcing your relationship with Tighnari and being siblings with Al-Haitham.)

People were gasping. It’s as if they struggled to breathe oxygen. Leaving many shocked and puzzled. None knew about your lover and brother.

Turns out Tighnari needed a few materials from the desert. So you went with him. Unknowingly, the news about your status of being Al-Haitham sister spreaded quicker than the reaction, a target now plagued into your back unknowingly. Tighnari flicked his ears, getting cautious as the fur on his tail bristled.

You noticed this quickly. He grabbed you suddenly, dragging you away from what seemed to be eremites. Dodging their arrows as you both hid behind some tall rocks. He’d shush you quickly as he heard them going closer. Grabbing your hand again. Leaving before they went to your spot. Using your hydro vision to make the sand wet in a different direction. The eremites followed it. You both successfully left.

or do you thought. Eremites came up from behind as they happened to have backup. Your eyes widened as Tighnari went in front of you. Getting stabbed into his stomach. Shielding you from the hit.

You’d shout at the eremites seeing what they did. Healing Tighnari quickly as he got up. Using his mine to confuse the eremites. You used it as a chance to bloom as he used his three quick charged shots. Healing him with your skill. Dodging attacks as they swung at you, hitting your arm as you got knocked to the ground. Dodging more attacks while kicking them away and up onto your feet using your burst while Tighnari used his. (For context, you summon stars to follow you and heal everyone while having increased crit dmg,rate,atk and healing. The stats have a big first impact like Kiraras but has a decent amount of damage after its first few hits. Skill is you harnessing hydro power like Candace and dealing healing/dmg.)

“There’s still more?!” You’d state as more kept coming towards the both of you. Keeping your health from hits up high. (Tighnaris still wounded, it’s not like in genshin where they get injuries and nothing happens beside hp bar.) A flash of lightning appeared with a wave. It was cyno and Nilou?!

“I was looking for these eremites.” Cyno stated as he charged forward. “I saw you both fighting and went to go get cyno!” Nilou said worriedly as she helped with the fight. Eventually the waves of eremites ended quickly. Seeing cyno was always a bad sight for those against him.

“Thank you cyno and nilou!” You’d say as you looked at them for a few moments hearing them speak as you tended to Tighnaris wounds carefully. Using your hydro power to heal him.

“You’re welcome Tighnari and Y/N.” They’d both stated as you checked on everyone’s injuries. They left as you took Tighnari back to Gandharva Ville.

“Heyy! Collei!” You’d say as you saw collei coming closer to the two of you. Worrying about the both of you as you headed with Tighnari to get himself patched up. When he woke up collei left you both alone with one another.

“I’m sorry narii! It’s my fault you got injuries if I just never announced it with you and kept it a secret for a little longer-MMH?!” You’d state as he kissed you. Preventing you from bad-mouthing yourself. He held you close as you stared at his blood-stained jacket on the side. Wrapping his tail around you comforting you efficiently.

“You did great. Don’t be a worrywart for me?”He’d ask you, looking at you with slight puppy eyes and adoration. His voice was soothing as you both sat in comfortable silence. You eventually fell asleep.

(ENDING 1)

He gently Carried you to the bed. Making sure to not wake you up as he gazed at you when he settled you down and went next to you. Wrapping his tail against you again as he put his chin above your head. Using his arms to bring you closer to him. You leaned into his touch and into his chest. He gazed at you and played with your hair for a few moments before falling asleep.

(ENDING 2)

He gazed at you sleeping in his arms. Staying in the hug position as he grabbed a nearby book and read it. Preparing and studying for tests. Knowing you’ll need his help later on with preparation. He gathered a few bits of info and left it on the side. Putting you on the couch as he left to go do work with collei before returning shortly.

(Kinda glad how this turned out ngl! This was fun imo as I like being super imaginative about certain things.)

(Hope you enjoyed!!)

[ugh-yoongi]

more personal stuff under the cut~

so my best friend’s (who i’ve been best friends with for 25+ years) spouse (who i have also been close with since high school, before they got together) recently came out as trans and started the process of transitioning to her correct gender.

all well and good. i love them no matter what.

to make a long story short, my aunt called me today to discuss xmas and i broached the topic with her of inviting bestie & spouse to thanksgiving bc they were not uninvited?? from their usual go-to but were basically told “maybe next year” and i wanted them to have the option.

my aunt was surprised, to say the least, but immediately started using the correct pronouns and her new name and said she wasn’t sure about my dad and grandfather but she’d sus them out and let me know. but to tell bestie’s spouse that she’s happy for and proud of her.

and then she texted me to say my dad is fully on board, that “he’s ok with if you’re ok with it,” and to tell bestie & spouse that they will always be family to us.

and this situation is not about me at all. it’s bigger and more important than me. but the “he’s ok if you’re ok” hit me like a ton of bricks and i full-on sobbed over it. i’ve talked about it here before, that my dad and i didn’t have a good (or any) relationship for a long time, and 9 times out of 10 i’m expecting him to disappoint me in some way.

but this was a reminder that, for as much space as i hold for people to disappoint me, i need to hold the same amount of space for them to surprise me. i haven’t spoken to my dad yet but i know he probably doesn’t “understand” people being trans, but he loves and respects me enough to take cues from me. he doesn’t have to “understand,” he’ll back me up regardless.

and, on a smaller scale, a reminder to me to stay true and loud on my morals and goodness and political stances, because people are listening and do look for guidance even when you think they aren’t.

anyway. just needed to get this out bc i have been crying over it all afternoon and i need to not cry at the sink doing dishes lmao.

[bandedbulbussnarfblat]

I had a rough week last week. Tuesday my dog gets sick, so I look up her symptoms. And bc I'm a crazy person, my mind automatically latched onto the worst possibility. So I spent three hours crying hysterically and having panic attacks bc I was so scared she would die. Then Wednesday I had to take my dog to vet and was still super stressed out. Thursday and Friday I have to deal with medicaid and disability paperwork. Saturday I had a panic attack so bad that I couldn't stop it and had to text my brother to come help me (he lives with me. we're too poor to live without a roommate, and we've basically lived together our whole lives, so it was whatever). Sunday morning I have a panic attack and can't leave my house to play my weekly dnd game bc the thought of spending hours with other people away from home was...bad. Sunday night, I got completely (and irrationally) terrified of being alone. I was so afraid that I called my mom, and of course she offers to come over. And I'm freaking out so bad I let her, even though it was late and I know she has to get up early for work. (She only stayed until my brother got back around 10:30)

BUT, today is a new day. I managed to get my blood work done today, and talk on the phone to my case worker, and pick up a pair of contacts from my eye doctor to wear until my order comes in. And I didn't have a panic attack. I mean, I still had to have my dad take me, bc leaving home alone isn't something I can do right now. (Mentally or physically. My brother's car broke down, and since he's the one who has a job, he's been using mine. i stg it's like a fucking family curse; every time someone is already in a financial bind, their car will break down.)

So I have decided to take the next few days to just relax. My two besties that I've been friends with since middle school both have kids with autism and they said I'm probably going through autistic burn-out. I'm pretty sure I'm autistic and my doctor thinks I'm somewhere on the spectrum, though on the lower support side. I'm gonna play bg3, and unwind. And try to work on some fic. (bc I have the next chapter of 16 Days damn near finished, and it's the last chapter that ties up the current plot, then there's an epilogue that takes place later that played out like a movie in my head, so writing it will be a breeze.)

Side note, did y'all know that some school systems still use 'high/low functioning'. I've had to say to my coworkers that autistic people would prefer not to use those terms. But it isn't surprising; one of my cousin's kids was literally diagnosed with Asperger's. Which has fallen under the autism spectrum disorder since like, forever ago. And also there was a TA in the autism classroom I worked in once who literally told me that autism was caused by demonic possession. I'm so glad I left the school system. Bc I eventually was going to fucking explode with rage after the way my kids were treated. (My students, not my actual kids. I don't have or want any)

Working in EC has really shown me how little the school system actually cares about helping the disabled; they will cut corners and do shit that 'technically' meets a kid's IEP, but doesn't do a damn thing to help them. And if you say something like, 'i don't think that counts' your coworkers will not be happy. But to a certain degree you can't be too mad, bc there is literally not enough time or resources to meet every child's needs, bc they cram as many kids in one EC classroom as possible, hire the minimum amount of TAs required by law and expect one teacher to be able to magically meet all their needs. My last job had 3 kids in wheelchairs in those tiny ass mobile units schools started using, that literally did not have room to move around, unless the other students stood up to let them get by, and sometimes even move their desk. We had multiple kids with autism. One of them stimmed by screaming, another was triggered by loud noises.

This post kinda went off on a tangent. Anyway, heads up to any parents who have kids starting school, make sure you get a copy of your child's IEP. If you think they aren't being serviced, contact your local Board of Education, and tell them that you have a child with an IEP who isn't receiving adequate services. Then threaten to sue them if they don't start providing your kid their services. It does not matter if you can actually afford to sue them or not, an IEP is a legally binding document. You have the right to sue, and most of the time the threat alone is enough to kick their ass into gear.

[daz4i]

not a negative post, in fact quite positive, but it feels weird to post as is so under a read more it goes

insane to see that people appreciate me and think i'm like. actually talented. like ppl in my group (the director included) think i'm a good writer and at first i thought it was just to be nice but today one of my besties there asked if i wanna join him and my other bestie in making a short horror film, and when i said yes he got excited and said that my writing will definitely help. a

and since i mentioned the director, she really likes the ideas i bring up and rolls with them and constantly tells me i'm doing great (also a few days ago i mentioned that i didn't finish high school, in great part bc i couldn't handle the word-heavy subjects, and she was surprised bc i seem smart and well read to her. and not only to her is the thing!!! like others have mentioned it in passing too including ones i only had brief conversations with??)

i think i've kinda been stuck in communities where ppl just. do the things i do. like a lot of folks in the local anime and geek communities here gave lectures at cons, so many of my tumblr friends are great writers, p much objectively better than i am, and since i was involved in voice acting communities in the past it seems like smth everyone does too and better than i do etc. and all that made me forget that most people don't do these things. and like, friends and family have already told me that, but i always assumed it's just bc they love me and so want me to feel good, but now hearing it from people who don't really have an incentive to do so, and relatively often too... makes it easier to remember, and easier to believe, that maybe sometimes i AM hot shit 🥺😤

[worldwright]

good evening ! im super early today bc im dying lmao

man, it was so fucking hard to fall asleep after my war against that fucking stinkbug, and someone i wont name fucking deserted and left her leader to fight this great and horrifying enemy

anyway, i checked which fucking painkiller i can take, and the only one i can is paracetamol but this fucker does nothing to my headaches, so im switching entirely to water from tea bc it works better than a fucking painkiller

i slept bad (what a surprise), my father woke me up bc he couldnt find me (man, the only day he wants to know where the fuck i am is the only where i dont wnat him to find him), a headache is there and my nap didnt help ;-; but at least i finished my second watch of glass onion (started last week) and watched the episode of dunmesh and now i can say w/o any doubt that chilchuck is my fav -he was from the very beginning but ude, now im sure)

ill be able to finally sleep in my bed tonight yay

and here a picture the coward from this morning (or icecream, or latte, or whatever you like to compare her to. my friends call her "table basse" [coffee table] or "chieng en format familial" [familiy-sized doggo]. youre too kind with your nicknames for her lol)

have a wonderful morning with your partner my friend !

o how decadent is her lounging !! would that we could all feel the same peace 😌❤️

(no that is not proper English grammar don't copy me 😭😭)

hehe tiny emojis 🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🍃🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

immmmmm so excited to hang out with people I felt like I was withering lmfao

I think I'm gonna go up to see all my friends next weekend, since all of them are once again living in their dream life shared apartment with the besties ughhhh I can't wait to live there

the new office manager at my job is so cool :3 he's incredibly gay lmfao

I've officially caught up on apothecary diaries. ugh what do I do with my life now

obviously the answer is wait impatiently for every new episode and write analysis posts in the meantime

mmm I wanna reread witch hat atelier...... next week downtime obsession found 👍👍

egg salad last night was all right! I accidentally added too much mayonnaise and then had to overcorrect from there, so it ended up not having as much egg per volume as it should have. but still tasty and nutritious :3

speaking of food you're SO valid about Chilchuck. he's just ❤️❤️❤️ This Is A Divorced Father Of Three With Extreme Communication Issues ❤️❤️❤️ who looks like a middle schooler 🥰🥰🥰

also chatted with a friend about our fic ideas, which was really fun. the problem is that I have a really fleshed-out AU, but I don't know what actual plot to put in the AU. lol. ahhhhhhh

girlfriend weekend!!!!! girlfriend weekend!!!!!!!!

hope your headache goes away in time for you to get good sleep tonight!!

[sophsun1]

I am with you in the same exact boat! I really hope they bring back the podcast and record some new episodes. I miss them so much, i really had so much fun listening and I usually hate podcasts. Plus so much has happened that they for sure need to talk about it. Hopefully all of us listening to it out of nowhere will trigger some universal reaction and they will record the episode. But I have to ask, what did you think about it? And what was your favorite episode? I loved the Poly pocket episode bc i agree with both of them on so many of their points but like the episode where they talked about their moms? It Killed me. Or to be honest any time Jordan did the australian accent.

Hey anon!

I finished it today and was literally rationing them out towards the end lmao.

I'm the same as you, I'm not a podcast girl and I put off giving this a listen for so long but the more I heard about the episodes, the more intrigued I became and eventually gave in.

It really was an overall delight and I was surprised by how much fun I had, I genuinely laughed throughout the whole run.

My favourite thing was the entire Randolph Clarke Harrison experience™️. I'm in love with him even more so and he needs to go on every podcast available and just talk. The chemistry between him and Jordan made it for me, as I said before having that space with your bestie where you can be yourself, no holds barred is the perfect dynamic.

Also getting to know Jordan was great and the moments where he talked about his anxiety and depression were relatable and he seems like such a sweet, vivacious soul, alongside his terrible, terrible Australian accent, sorry Jordan! Everytime he dragged Randy, I cheered.

Randy and the stupid quiz gave me life and I secretly enjoyed getting the answers right when he didn't lol.

Poly pocket was a highlight for sure and I too was in agreement with a lot of their takes, the light bulb moment of putting two and two together regarding Randy's issues with qaf. The locker room episode with their friend Mikéah was a riot and hearing their coming out stories and family trauma was eye opening.

Talking of Mikéah the episode where they honour his memory made me cry and I applaud them and especially Jordan for getting through it, because it was hard to listen to I cannot imagine how it felt for them. The times he appeared on the podcast were full of laughter and you could tell how much he and Jordan loved each other.

Special mention to my fave little guest star - Latrice! 🐈

I swear I died laughing when Randy told the story of how they found her and Jordan's naming process, she's an icon with the longest name I've ever heard for a cat. Everytime she was meowing in the background, I was like awww. (I love cats so much in general) my only gripe is I wish it was a video podcast, imagine!

I hope they put out more episodes soon, hopefully Jordan is doing well and they both find the time and we manifest their return.

[khodorkovskaya]

20.02.23

first day of uni today!

yesterday i went skating with my zurich friend and my oxford/france bestie and my student and his wife. it was lots of fun! then my zurich friend and my bestie and i went for a walk. to my surprise my zurich friend and the greek girl he's been going on and on about aren't like together together! i thought they were like officially a thing but "it's complicated". idk i like my zurich friend and he has potential but he's such an ugly duckling now lol. in the sense that in a couple of years time he's gonna be a beautiful swan like he's gonna be husband material bc he's not bad looking and he's well raised and he's like very intelligent. but right now he's so awkward! and the thing with the greek girl like come on... the man has no experience and it's sad. i mean no, it's not sad. it's just like oh you're young and awkward. anyway, im really excited to see the man he's gonna become in like five years.

anyway i really wanted more gossip on the greek girl bc im a libra rising. and i wanted to talk to my zurich friend like one on one and i felt bad about not staying with him for longer. but i felt so guilty about just like doing nothing the whole day and not working. it was driving me nuts.

my parents went to visit this old lady who lives in a beautiful mansion who has a bunch of vintage clothes. and her story is kinda sad bc her husband passed away not long ago and she has no family left, no kids, nothing. all she has is this huge mansion with a beautiful view on the lake and tonnes and tonnes and tonnes of clothes she doesn't know what to do with. she's a prisoner in her own home basically. bc she's so attached to all of her stuff but it has to go bc she sold the mansion and has to move out in four months. but where is she gonna put all this stuff? what even happens with your stuff once you die? where does it all go? my cousin and i were wondering what we're gonna do with our grandma's cat collection when she passes... what are we gonna do with all those cats? (precision: not actual cats!!! like figurines and stuff!)

my stepdad and i have been losing our minds over the last email we got. like it's pure délire. i can't tell you guys what it's about but we can't sleep because of it lol. it's crazy. one day im gonna write a book about everything that's been happening, it's insane.

anyway, i really miss B these days. more so sexually than anything. but then i think about our actual sex life and it was so awkward... there were good moments for sure but i was so like... not good with myself and my body. but then i can't imagine sex with anyone else. just the simple thought of like using a condom during sex with someone makes me so sad. im like shit, i should call him. but then i think about the potential consequences of caling him... like fuck. i don't love him anymore. what do i do now? how do i exist without love?

[after-nine-at-the-oasis]

Btw forgot to say but yeah I doubt about that the drowning xd

Oof he's gonna lose connection

Hmm idk about cop

Aaand there he goes xD

Yesss besties he does 👀 :)

"Are you suggesting a trip to the tropics?" "I wasn't, but-" xDD girlie sounded skeptical at first but Nyla wants to get out of here lol 💀 XD

YESS go lol :D

And you get funding xD

Knowing him and Bailey? You're right not to be surprised

Oh yeahh lol no jurisdiction xD

Well I mean just help in general is good

I mean they don't have it either lol, there's still crime

His anniversary xD

Wesley 👀?

LOL yep xD his rich family money

I don't think you're bringing him though lol

Hey and you get reimbursed lol!

XD First class and the trust fund lol

Grey's right on that xD

"Why can't it be both?" ain't it xD

Yep lol, basically

Also it's not even that sunny there or anything lol

OOP hey guys o.o

Bro's just trying to ask to talk xD

😬😬 I'm glad you're talking though

:((( poor babeys D:

I mean you might wanna try and figure out if it's good weird or bad weird

Lol bell around the neck xD

Yk we probably won't see Wesley but at least we got a mention 😌

Sorry (not) anyway lol

XD he's like "you're ruining my Tim tests" lol

I mean hey he trained you xD

XD I love them lol

OPE why are y'all walking someone at night ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ

Like to meet Angela and Nyla? Nah because you don't know they're coming

Honestly they'll probably be thinking they're on their own for a while if not the whole time

Like be thinking that for that amount of time I mean

Y'all I should NOT be watching this at night😭 we ain't even at the real freaky stuff yet xD

Feeling like them right now lol

Okay not that bad lol

THAT SOUND DID NOT HELP

Like the door opening

Why are we here though? Are we taking her back? Shouldn't she already be there also we didn't see the body with y'all lol?

Poor lady :(

Ahh taking a look

Hmm looking for anything sus

Behind her left ear? And looking like that? Nahhh that's sus

The left ear is just bc, hard to get to

Uh oh o.o

Guysss 😭

"Where's your hand"- oh right bc it's dark lol

Okay but besties. Why would it be empty. Think about that

Susser by the moment

I'm too tense rn y'all xD

Guyssss xd

Yeeah better than using it xD

Hopefully he's not secretly a good guy lol

UH OH

Oh yeah don't forget the camera o.o

Y'all are stressing me out 😭😭

Guys let's be real it's not gonna happen xdd

Oh missed the escaping bit lol had to go back

Uh oh o.o

I would not sleep if I were y'all lol

Don't worry they're coming xD

LOL but it's instead of each other xD

But I was gonna say nah they're gonna have to show up when Nolan and Bailey are already in danger or something, bc otherwise they'd leave (bc clearly the boat's working by then)

OPE

NAHH Y'ALL I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THIS

I said, having totally signed up for this xd

HE SHOULD GO CHECK BUT-

NAHHHHH

UH OH

NO GIRLIE DO NOT GO OUT THERE

ONE OF YOU STAY

HE GOES YOU STAY

NOOO-

AGH CRAP

Gosh 😭😭😭

Aww hey girl :))

Nahh sleep xD

Aww love them 🥰

If it is today though be careful lol

UH OH IT IS NOW TODAY??

Oh no just time moved up

ANYWAY BAD O.O

I would be s t r e s s i n g xD I'm sure Lucy is too lol

Aww hey guys :D

Them dang screams xd though that one sounded more like a seagull lol

OPE SLFHDHKSLD SLAY LOL

I love them so much <33

Just thinking about Angela being like "heeyyy babe how are things just calling to tell you I'm using your trust fund card to pay for first class tickets to a remote island to rescue Nolan from a murderer 🥰🥰 kk love you, don't forget to pick Jack up, I'll see you in a few days 😙". Iconic XDD

PHEW she made it xD

😑 when I tell you I would be m a d

Especially bc it looks like she didn't bring anything with her xd

Lol both

Slayy Celina

Yeah I'd be glad, done with all that stress xD

Okayy slay Celina, we love her research

Like it's a thing she does yk :)

:OO Slay bestie :D!!

Ahh he was gonna rob maybe 👀

Go off Celina :D

The difference in responses lol xD

[castle-dominion]

Bro I literally just popped in the disc, I love how it is blue this time & has different music. So cool bestie.

c3x16 setup

Ok so this is the first of a twoparter.

I don’t understand why they do this weird thing & then do the “36 hours earlier” titlecard. It’s valid but weird & I’m personally not a fan.  Reminds me of the alien episode tho. I’ve also watched too much stranger things. & then when beckett was there I totally thought it would be like a clone or smth. Evil twin beckett. 

Car parts, of course he’s already spoken to auto theft!

DID YOU JUST CALL HIM BABEY? LP: Ooh! Did I? What did castle say? My watch is broken, I need to reset it every now & then. If I die, don’t trust the time on my watch! Noggin is such a cute word

Seven years is a long time to be not a citizen, that’s sad, you should be a citizen anyway.

What is beckett looking at on her phone ono

Ah yes, the notes app. “the father (tumblr drafts) the son (journaling) and the holy spirit (notes app)” (corpsecoded, empty blog) RC: Got it! It’s a phone number! KR: I tried that RC: with all the area codes? KR: Yeah???? KB: Castle! RC: Coming!  Work wife moments

Washington heights, the place that johanna worked at! It was the cousin to get into the family! Renting shifts is so weird to me. You answer the phone & don’t even leave the room to take the call?

KB: Robbed, & shot in the head. Unus: Apples & oranges, peaches & pears. Who’s in my house? Please get out.  Apples & oranges, pizzas & pies. Get out of my house or I’ll kill you in the head.

Ew cops should not be allowed to lie.  Mm, I should go back to improv. White boy in high school.

KB: Sorry guys... I have to take this (girl u take calls all the time) KR: *literally just walking to the observation room where beckett, esposito, & castle All are* KB: Sorry, Ryan. Not now. (That was So Soft) KR: ... RC: What’s up with her? JE: You know Beckett. She plays it close to the vest. KR: *looks back to where beckett left; looks over to where esposito also just walked off; holds up a finger* RC:  KR: *tells castle instead bc he had it in his head that He Was Going To Share This Information & if he doesn’t do that then Things Will Go Wrong, another point for the adhd ryan headcanon, & besides Castle is basically a detective too now* RC: ... So I’ll tell beckett that KR: Could you? That would be best Why? bc he’s closer with her or she likes him so she won’t bite his head off? bc u have other stuff to do? bc he has better stuff to do obv

Where did he get that much money??

Ew hidden surveillance

Alexis is so pretty rn! Serenity DX DX  Oh no, what kind of spiritual retreat...? Lmao alexis & rick, physics physics Oh! Physics exam! what a good dad, taking the fall for her RC: Best dad ever

OK NEW DAY Castle’s jacket looks great today. Checkered dark grey on darker grey. Dr motorcycleboy Oh no they be fighting.

Up the wazoo??? Who wrote that line??? Remaining costume update: Beckett’s jacket is nice, esposito is chill (but also has a dress jacket which is valid but kinda looks odd with the zip-up shirt he’s wearing), ryan is soft & sweatered but dressed nicely as usual, montgomery is the way he always is.  Driving a loop, that’s sus!

This man is a college student & I love him

I cannot see easily where he is packing. I’m surprised montgomery noticed but then again they are cops & live in the usa.

Beckett if he was hiding it she probably would NOT know what it was, because, well, he was Hiding It.

JE: Cwoffee shop But how did you find that out??

*casually hands it to castle* At least she is asking for his permit to carry Syrian consolate, our guy was syrian too. Why didn’t he just say “no”?

Love ryan’s jacket over his stuff & esposito looks... interesting but not bad but def not normal

Ew secret police. Oh did ryan change his jacket since this morning? That’s odd, it looks like a normal jacket. I like the light pink collared shirt & then the cute sweater over it. It’s just so good. But they sure have him in sweaters a lot these coming episodes.  Ah. Soccer Oh woah wait that was an odd whip! They made it look like the c4121652 was written twice. In reality, it was in the center. Everyone: So? Who types with their fingers & then HITS ENTER WITH THEIR INDEX FINGER? (I just spent ten minutes on hacker typer.) Storage unit? Who owns a moving company? the cousin!

That is disturbing. Why do you find that hot castle? WHy? Altho I can see in a normal way, some strong woman willing to weild bolt-cutters like that, she’s def hot, but that is not disturbing, what you find hot you say is disturbing & that’s really weird.  & the first key is the right one? Al capone’s vault Totally valid for castle to stand like that. Dead body Or That! RUN BABE! Ok so she just has a geiger counter on her & it wasn’t crackling until it hit max? Like she didn’t just do a little bit at first? Well ig it took until she poked the thing...  Why did she sound so aaaaaah anyways?

Well if you are not throwing up then you’re going to be fine

Who is this rando? Ah, DHS. Come on, cooperate my dude, I know you look pissed.

At least they gave them benches. How long did it take for them to set this place up? To be honest, grandma’s plateware would max out a geiger counter that cheap.

I have a question tho, he opened his notes app right before he was killed. Was HE renting the locker? He was not. He just found out about it that evening! Montgomery my beloved. RM: Just to be clear, are you taking over? DHS guy: No my friend JE: ICE sent over papers KR: He was a weapons guy. DHS guy: Now I’m taking over

RC: Well we will when it goes off, in that nanosecond before we’re vaporized. (Except it would not be enough time for your brain to fire off the signals for you to know) Girl talking about something else should not be about her personal issues. But at least it is turning out nicely. You are people. You don’t need to measure up. GEORGE CRABTREE MOMENTS, HE ALWAYS FALLS IN LOVE WITH DRIVEN WOMEN & THEY ALWAYS END UP CHASING THEIR DREAMS & THIS POOR MAN DIDN’T GET A WIFE FOR SO SO LONG SO LONG BESTIE Hun you need a QPR

Oh wow they’re fine. See? I told you their radiation counter would max out at old-timey dishware.

Alexis says “late night?” & then martha is leaving on a short roadtrip & castle is going to be heading back out there like when do these guys ever sleep? Oh good dad! Spend time with your family before y’all die. Or Also Send your daughter out there! Get her out of the city under false pretenses!

I had a radiation hyperfixation at some point.  Speaking of Jenny, do we get a wedding episode? I’d love one like in Sherlock (the sign of three). Smart boys, all of them have tried to get their gals out of the city.  JE: Didn’t work. She hates her mom. Dying laughing Did they only tell the homicide ones or did they tell the rest of the cops...? idk how bomb threats work.  That’s valid! Kick him off! Castle you-... !?

Mum said that the baby was the bomb meaning there was no baby but I took it to mean that they gave surgery to the baby & implanted her with a bomb but that was silly. B’y beckett is the hard scary bad cop, she is a woman yes, but that does not mean she is the soft one who is designed to reel you back in.  Greencard baby. “I never loved your mom. We had a baby to escape communist china!”

I thought they said it was a cash deposit, not wired... I love how castle is doing work on the computers today. Feels good to see. (the fbi: we’ve been trying to highlight things for years, but all our highlighters were black!) also just noticed: ryan is TEACHING castle how to “do grunt work” as he’d say

RC: An arab terrorist, who would believe it? JE: Think back bro RC & me: That Was My Point daisy-chaining, interesting verb RC: It’s not that well hidden if I can find it Could you be a terrorist without Jenny knowing?

GIRL YOU’RE UPSETTING THE BABY BABE REEL HIM IN GIRL SHE’S REELING YOU IN LISTEN TO HER WAIT YOU SPEAK ARABIC THAT’S ACTUALLY COOL HOLY FUCK & THAT’S SO COCKY OF YOU TO GIVE HER A HANDKERCHIEF mum said it was for tear dna also who is agent geiner? some other dhs one? EW DON’T BUG PEOPLE. PLAYING? BRO I HATE THIS MAN

Six hours before u & beckett got there but no time stamp? Ah yes, lead. 

Ok so six hours before caskett got to the storage container, jamal was there. Then agent fallon said twelve hours ago he disappeared. So it’s pretty late.  That scene with his face? He’s in on it. He’s the terrorist.  Driven, good coop. As a person? Kind of a douche. That’s cops. In their job they might be great but they are often douchebags & upholding a bastardized system.

True!! Sadly not literally sweating bullets, but metaphorically yeah, if he knew what he was transporting he would have lost his dickens!

Oh the military did it. Definitely. Where are u going castle? I didn’t understand this here.  I like the music too. Really good. 

Run what down? The phone? He said he bought the phone, not that he credit carded the phone! Checked it out twelve hours ago? Fits with the timeline Ryan notices that castle is gone? & cares to ask abt it?

Oh it’s the consolate guy. I like how he’s having a fancy coffee at a regular old bar. This man is great. Talking, being as open as he can be despite his issues. What skills are yours...? I actually really respect this guy.

Oh... did he catch you or does he think you were making out? Keep your voice low. RM!!! He thinks outside the box <3  Lol castle was bluffing XD

Beckett says “martha” not “your mom” here.  Ooh genius little man! Didn’t they just do this last episode? They went on their own to solve a case abt raglan (not raglan, johanna). Nice photo lol. RC: It’s like our own mini precinct KB: Except it smells better

Why does ryan grab fallon’s arm like that?

Except that people often forget about cab drivers, wait staff, mail personnel, etc. 

Oh so y’all are planning on going to the warehouse where he was murdered? Haven’t you already been there & hasn’t csu checked it out???

Ok, you would have already heard the helicopter before it went into view. 

Just like al capone’s vault bestie.

So whose car is that? beckett’s personal car? she has a car in new york? White van, dun dun dun!!! Oh it’s a bomb. 13 hours. It must be pretty late. Has anyone ever slept? & gunshots. It seems dangerous to shoot at them with a bomb right there. btw music design is cool.  Tin is not great.  Which door??? Ooh nice camera shots! Weren’t they shooting thru that box? Bro... they locked u in? DANG SOME FROZEN GUY! (& some fun audio!) Ooh so smart! Ripping off a tape job on the van!

Ok so that is the end & this box is a freezer. Is it a delivery truck box? That would make sense. I’ve been in walk-ins, I’ve had my fair share of cry sessions.

Welp that is the end of the first episode of this pair!

Again, the music playing in the episode selection bar is great. It really talks about the show. Sneaky, silly, & sexy.

not rly many clips here...

[wunderlustwriter]

Truest Form

Loki isn’t the only one with a few tricks up his sleeve, especially when his alleged soulmate has some pretty intricate powers.

cw: afab reader, they/them pronouns, promiscuous & flirty but SFW, normal MCU warnings, Loki being Loki and Y/N being Y/N

this takes place in an imaginary track of time where everyone is happy and healthy and alive and whatever i say goes bc this is my au and i’m a fragile human

You see, the funny thing about life is all of its little twists and turns. Your “what ifs” could’ve lead you down the exact same path you’re on right now, or it most definitely could not. You never know.

Except for Y/N.

They knew.

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

“Hey Clint” You shout over the loud 70s music playing throughout the kitchen to the man who just walked in not even a second ago. “I’m making breakfast for the team. Tony wants everyone at the compound for some big meeting,,, which is probably why you’re here so never mind….. do you want waffles or pancakes?”

“How did you- oh wait, right, you have that whole sixth sense thing. So don’t you know the answer to that question?”

Sighing you nod “Waffles… I just hate freaking everyone out. I heard some of the SHIELD agents conspiring that I’m invading peoples minds and I don’t want them to get creeped out and-“

Cutting you off, Wanda and Vision walk into the room as Clint just shakes his head at you and walks towards the table to join the other members of the team.

“Ooooooh I almost forgot today was family brunch day!” Wanda says, unlatching her arm from Visions’s to give you a hug.

“Yes everything seems delightful Y/N. Did you need any help?” Vision asks, making his way over to the two of you.

“Oh just turn off the smoke alarm for me real quick.“

Not even two seconds later alarms start blaring throughout the great room and smoke makes its way out of the oven.

“Yeah, I knew I should’ve cleaned that last week and, wait, Wand, will you get that for me, I-“

Gasping, you jump around and look towards the elevator right as it softly chimes, letting its audience know that someone is making their way up the floors “THORS COMING TODAY!!! I DIDNT EVEN REGISTER THAT HE GOT BACK ONTO MIDGUARD. MUCH LESS IN THE BUILDING! HOW DID THIS HAPPEN- Wait.”

Turning again, you look at Wanda who is smirking and reloading the waffle maker.

“You bitch! Is that why you were so pushy about the spa day yesterday, especially the sensory deprivation tank!?!”

Laughing at you Wanda shrugs and goes back to finishing up your cooking while you wait by the elevator.

Almost a year ago, due to whatever sciencey stuff Banner tried explaining, you realized that you are able to communicate with different versions of yourself throughout the multiverse. Basically making you really sensitive to energy and vibrations, even allowing you to manipulate them with some training. That’s what made you and Wanda become so close. With similar abilities, the two of you just understood each other. So, when the Avengers found you as a prisoner in one of HYDRA's bases, the two of you became besties. Well, you and-

“Thor!!!!” You ran towards the tall Asgardian as soon as the elevator doors opened and launched yourself into his arms. Half expecting this, Thor lifts you up off the ground and spins the two of you around in a bear hug while his pot-bellied laugh fills the room.

“Ah! My little Forcefield! I have missed you too! But I can see that the surprise did not work. Who told?”

Wanda scoffs and hands a tray full of scrambled eggs to Vision who sets it down on the table “I did no such thing. They found out when you go up the elevator. I told you that when you have powers like ours, surprises do not come easy. I didn’t even believe that you’d make it this far.”

Laughing Thor sets you on the ground and calls mjolnir to his side before glancing back in the elevator and remembering his true purpose for being here. “Oh, uh. Hmm, right.”

“Oh goody Dear Brother, I was beginning to believe that you had forgotten about me.” the man says as he emerges from the elevator.

For the first time in who knows how long you are genuinely surprised to see another person stand behind you, causing you to actually jump back.

Confused and concerned, you push Thor out of the way and meet his brother right outside the elevator. Getting strangely close, you stick a hand out and reach towards him “Uh. Excuse me. Mortal. What are you doing? Br... Brother! Come get your pet!”

But before Thor can even listen you push your thumb against the strange man’s forehead and he starts to wince while his body flickers.

Shivering and breathing raggedly Loki blinks at you with his eye brows furrow and eyes wide while you bring your hand down. “Hey big guy, is your brother a hologram? Is that a thing on asguard?”

Thor let’s out an angry puff, steam practically pouring from his ears while he shouts at the top of his lungs. “LOKI!!”

The man in front of you vanishes into smoke and a loud pop sounds a couple of feet to your side.

“Right, well thanks for that snitch. I was almost free and that wasn’t a ho- Oh no. Hey come on. Do we really have to?” clink.

“You swore that you wouldn’t pull any tricks. Now you lied to me so yes. We really have to.” Both brothers look equally annoyed and right as Thor moves to turn on the power dampening collar you place a hand on top of his and shake your head.

“Something’s not right. Take it off. Now.” Looking really confused but doing as you say, Thor hands the collar to you.

Wanda makes her way over as you snap the collar together and press the button on the side and the entire thing bursts into flames. Before you cringe and toss it towards Wanda who guides the collar towards the sink and turns on the water with her powers

“Oooh. Yikes. Friday, remind Bruce to disassemble the collar and figure out what happened.” you say as Thor pats you on the shoulder “Okay then. Let’s eat!”

Everyone in the room just shrugs and nods, moving to the table to make their plate while Loki just stands still, mouth agape and in disbelief.

“So we’re just going to ignore the fact that the thing your leaders were going to force me to wear probably would’ve blown up in the my face and killed me?” Loki shouted at the room full of people who began to gather their plates.

“Yeah, pretty much” Clint says after reaching over the table and stealing a few more pieces of bacon.

“Awe, don’t worry, if someone really wanted to kill you they would be here to do the job and not leave it up to chance. Come on, let’s eat” You make eye contact with Loki as you pat him on the shoulder. When you do, a jolt of electricity runs through your veins and you instinctively flinch your arm back.

You’re about to make a joke saying that Thor is supposed to be the god of lightning when you look up and see scenes of your life literally flashing before your eyes.

There’s what almost feels like memories of you and, seemingly, Loki, Running through the forest, swimming in an enchanted lake, jumping from a cliff into the ocean, holding each other next to a fire. Then there are scenes that definitely did not come from this lifetime. Scenes of you and Loki running over hills as wolves, touring the galaxies as some alien race, colliding together as two planets. It’s almost as if the two of you were always meant to bump into each other.

Then, as if being yanked from a bungee cord, the memories play in reverse and you find yourself back in the present. The only person who seemed to notice being Wanda.

As if no time passed at all Loki says “Ouch! No need to shock me, I’m going.”

When Thor sits down, he beams and looks across the table. “Banner, good friend, could you make a new collar for my brother over there. He really shouldn’t be running away on this mission. Especially since father sent him down with me as punishment for his latest crime.”

As Bruce is about to speak, you interrupt “Oh don’t worry. Loki’s not going anywhere.”

“I’m not?” “He’s not?” the two brothers chime in.

“Of course not. How could he fall in love with me if his mind and spirit are elsewhere?” Some people look at you curiously after that statement, maybe even slightly amused, but others don’t bat an eye as prophetic talk like this isn’t out of the norm for you.

“Uh, Thor, your pet is being weird again.”

“Nonsense. It’s Y/N. That’s just how they are.”

“What’s nonsense? Because our case isn’t nonsense and that’s the reason I called you all together. So maybe we should be talking about that, yeah?” Tony says, strolling into the dining room with boxes of papers in his hands

“Come on Tony, can’t you let us eat before grueling us with work” Sam chimes in when he finally sits down after making his plate.

“Ah yes. The Avengers. So mighty and noble, but not without snack breaks of course. Whatever will- wait. Did Y/N cook today?”

“Yeah Tones, fresh off the stove, eat while it’s hot.” You reply with a smile.

“Okay. Meeting is paused while we take a quick recess and eat Y/N’s ‘big family brunch’. I almost forgot what day it is” Tony says, clapping his hands together and going to make a plate

Chuckling, you glance at the god next to you and nod your head towards the table. “Loki, right? Why don’t you go sit down next to Thor, I’ll make you a plate.” as he starts to bicker you hold a hand up and roll your eyes “I don’t care if you don’t trust midguardians OR their food OR if you say you aren’t hungry right now. Be a good boy and sit and eat with the rest of the team please.” you grin and walk towards the kitchen before he has the chance to speak.

As Loki reluctantly sits next to Thor, Wanda makes her way over to you. “Y/N, you blimped again. What was it about?” she asks you, placing a hand on your back for comfort

“Oh nothing bad this time. I can fill you in, just not right now.”

She nods at your words and stays behind to add toppings to her pancakes.

When you walk back to the table you drop Loki’s plate in front of him and sit right next to him. “Would ya scoot over a little bit for me love?” you softly ask and Loki finds himself following your words before he can even question it.

By the time his brain processes what just happens, you’re leaning over his lap to give thor an extra hair tie and asking Bucky to pass you the syrup and butter, throwing Loki a quick wink when your eyes meet again.

Uncharacteristically flustered, Loki just stares at you with bewilderment. Unable to find any words to create a snarky comment, he eventually gives up and starts to eat his food.

Although he would never say it in front of everyone, all of the food on his plate tastes practically as good as the ones back home. Sure, it wasn’t the elegant dishes served at his infamous parties, but it reminded him of Mother’s home cooked meals on warm summer evenings.

Out of habit, he begins to look around the table for something to put on the unfamiliar round, pastry-looking thing on his plate. Even though you’re in the middle of laughing while reliving a mission with Sam, you instinctively hold the container of butter right in front of Loki’s face, without even a glance in his direction.

“Oh my gods don’t remind me! I felt like Eleven from that one tv show with the way blood dripped down my nose.” you replied with a laugh as Loki hesitantly took the dish from your hands.

You laughed and talked with the team for nearly an hour more until Tony reeled everyone back in.

“Alright, alright. Thank you Y/N, your Sunday brunches are always appreciated. Now, time to address the god-sized elephant in the room. Our Asgardian… pals, have come down to monitor hotspots of some random god/mutant/power mumbo-jumbo. More details will come on a need to know basis, the basics are in these folders Peter is passing out, but right now it seems like we’re in the scouting phase, trying to take preemptive measures. Y/N, I do want you to continue your training with Wanda and Sam, energy and hotspots seem just up your alley and you still have a lot to work on before stepping back into the field. Bruce, I’ll meet you in your lab after this. Thor, Steve, and Nat, you will be our main recon team. Everyone else, continue with your normal training. Just make sure you read your folders and, remember, you are all on call for the next few weeks. Meeting adjourned, go do your shit, avenge some souls, I don’t care just get out of my face and- what Clint?”

“I’m sorry but I don’t get it. Didn’t mysteriouso over there try to take over New York? Why is he back here?”

“Yes, why am I back here dear brother?”

“Ah, of course. Well, when father sent me down to check on Midguard, he ordered Loki to come along as part of his sentence. If something with these hotspots goes wrong, he can help us and will then repay his debt to New York.” Thor says matter-of-factly before standing up and bringing his plates into the kitchen.

“Of course. Makes perfect sense” Clint says, rolling his eyes and starting to clean up too.

While everyone begins cleaning you start making your way out of the room with someone’s eyes following you. Briefly stopping, you turn your head slightly without looking over your shoulders and say “Aren’t you coming”

When you turn left down an empty corridor you hear Loki huff and finally catch up to you. “What games are you playing mortal? Do you know who you are toying with? I am a god. What makes you think you can read my mind and-“

You turn around and gently cup Loki’s cheeks with both of your hands. Completely thrown off by the gesture, he immediately goes silent. “Okay, I can tell you’re flustered.”

In protest, Loki raises his voice and begins “I’m not-“

Cutting him off again, you gently rub one of his cheeks with your thumb and look into his eyes “It’s okay. Why don’t you take a deep breath with me, yeah? In…. Hold… And out…. Thank you”

Loki looks at you with a bewildered rage as he finds himself complying to your words yet again.

Once he calms down you gently remove your hands and continue speaking “Okay, let’s walk and I’ll answer all of your questions, yeah?”

You begin to walk while Loki stays behind, still bewildered at everything that just played out, causing you to have to link arms with him so he’ll keep up. You continue to talk “Okay, come on. I’m not playing any games. I know you don’t trust people easily but I have no reason to lie to you about anything. And I don’t think I’m toying with you, but frankly I don’t know what you mean by that. I’m not trying to use you because you’re a powerful god, if that’s what you mean. I have all the power I need. I just know what I see and what I feel and what I perceive and-“ with a sigh you stop walking and look the god right in his eyes “Loki, sweetheart, would you please stop trying to read my mind? I never read yours and you’re starting to give me a headache.”

“Sorceress! You’re doing it again. Why do you keep touching me and calming me down? Is it some ploy to steal my powers? What’s your angle? Oh. I bet you’re being nice to me so we can be allys, so you can have protection in case the big bad Loki ever tries to rule Earth again. Or maybe you’re being coy, trying to seduce me so you can get close and attack me when you think I’m weakest.”

Throughout his entire rant (?) Loki kept moving towards you, trying to intimidate you into cowering backwards. You don’t budge or react to any of his outbursts until the very end when you let out a slight giggle.

Noticing this, Loki moves even closer to you, bending his head down slightly so he’s at your level with a shit eating grin plastered across his face. “Ah, so I see I’m coming close. What, were you hoping your little stolen glances and flirty behavior would have me fawning over you, allowing you to manipulate and gain control over me? Oh, I bet you think you’re so smart. And- dear Odin! Why do you keep laughing?”

Covering your face, you take a deep breath and try to stifle your laughs. Once you regain your composure you move even closer to the god in front of you and place your hands on your hips.

“Loki, my love” Glancing down to his lips then back up to his eyes, you continue, “while I’m loving all this ‘will they / when will they’ tension between us right now, if I wanted to seduce someone into a quick fuck I would just go see your brother again. And as for my behavior, I was just being kind. Sure, maybe a little flirty, I didn’t realize you were such a prude. But don’t get mad at me because you blush like a schoolgirl every time I look at you. Or because there are butterflies flying in your stomach whenever I brush against you. And please, don’t try to read my mind again, I’m getting all of this from your aura, for lack of a better term.”

Loki just blinks at you for a few seconds before standing up straight and looking out the window behind your head, mumbling “I cant believe you fucked my brother.”

“Jealous much? And please, I find it hard to believe that you’ve never fucked your best friend before. Now come on, I have something I want to show you. Like I already said, I promise I’ll answer all of your questions if you just stick it out a little bit longer.”

Not even waiting for a response, you grab Loki’s hand and continue walking down the corridor, past different halls and doorways until you reach an old fashioned, forest-green, wooden door with special knots on the outside.

With your free hand you open the door and drag Loki inside with you until it shuts behind. Once the two of you step inside, torches along the side walls light up to revel a two story library. There are shelves upon shelves filled with books, each one telling a different story with dates ranging back to pre-colonialism. On the right side of the room, there is an enchanted fireplace paired with emerald green chaise lounges right in front of it.

Against the back wall is an oval shaped cascading pool that leads to a large bay window. The view overlooks an endlessly starry night that definitely resembles no place on earth.

Littered between aisles and bookshelves are dozens of arm chairs and sofas for leisure reading. In the middle of the room is a large, dark oak table, fit for writing, working, or dining.

Finally, against the right wall is a wet bar fully equipped with drinks and snacks that never replenish.

Once he has the chance to take everything in, Loki’s energy changes to that of a kid on Christmas morning. Cautiously, he proceeds to the bookshelf on the right of the fireplace, touching each different spine while he unconsciously pulls you with him, not letting go of your hand. It isn’t until he stumbles upon an old Asgardian novel that Loki speaks.

“What is this place? Where did you get this?” Looking down at The Book of Yggdrasill in his hands you smile and shrug “It was gifted to me from… an old friend. Well, maybe closer to an heirloom? The room, that is. Whoever posses the key is able to draw the door to this room wherever they want and an enchanted library is said to pop up. As it’s been past down throughout the generations people have added new features and new collections. I haven’t seen many Asgardian books, but my guess is that was put here by one of the previous owners. Please, look around. I’ll make us a drink.”

Absentmindedly, Loki just nods along while skimming over book titles and touching the spines of nearly half the books. “Uh, Loki, God of Mischief and everything, I can’t go until you let go of my hand sweetheart.”

“Oh- oh. Right.” he says while shaking himself out of the trance and letting go of your hand.

You make your way over to the bar while Loki continues to just ogle at the place you’ve brought him to. It isn’t until you’ve just finished making drinks that Loki saunters his way back over to you.

“Here, try this” you say while sliding the glass across the bar. Loki gives you a look and you roll your eyes. “It’s not bad and it’s not poisoned. Even if it was, what earth poisons would even affect an Asgardian? Would you like me to take the first sip?”

“Oh I’m sure someone will figure out one soon enough, so just in case.” Nudging the glass back to you you roll your eyes again and swipe your tongue across the flavored rim before taking a swig and swallowing, opening your mouth to show proof.

Hesitantly, Loki takes the drink from the bar and tries a sip while you explain the contents. “A shot of bourbon and chartreuse watered down over ice with roasted peppercorn and rosemary garnish topped with a rim of rosemary infused honey. I highly doubt it’ll even get you even buzzed but the flavor seems like you.”

Loki cocks his head to the side before taking another sip and saying “Not bad.”

“Awe, you love it, how cute. Now bring that with you while we sit on one of the couches. I said I’d answer your questions and I don’t back out on my word.”

When the two of you sit down, facing eachother on different arm chairs, he’s the first one to say anything. “Why bring me here when we just met?”

“Do you want the vague & mysterious answer or the transparent one that might drive you away?”

“Dealer’s choice.”

“Okay, in part i brought you here because I knew, or at least I had a feeling, that you would need a quiet and isolated space away from the team to chill out. Also in part because I love this place and we are going to fall in love so it only seems fitting.”

“Are you being facetious? Why do you keep saying that?”

“No, I’m being genuine. We are, or at least we have the potential to be, soulmates. Mmm, wait, that sounds cringey. Twin flames? True loves? Starseeds? Different cultures have different names for it, so I suppose that doesn’t matter, but you get the picture?”

“What makes you say these things, how do you know?”

“Mmmmmm basically I get visions sometimes, and while they don’t always make sense and they aren’t always from this life, they almost always provide useful.”

“So you’re a prophet?”

“Ha! No, most definitely not. Basically I’m really sensitive to energy so sometimes I get messages from other versions of myself, and other times I know when the smoke alarm is about to go off. That’s how I knew you were trying to read my mind earlier, and how I knew you weren’t really there when you first walked in with Thor.”

“Okay so mind powers?”

“Sure, mind powers”

“Then why me? If you really believe in soulmates or whatever you said, then why don’t you have someone with similar lineage? Someone who is at least from the same planet.”

“Because it’s always been you. Loki, you’re not destined to be alone. You deserve to be loved as much as anyone else... I can show you what I saw if you’d like.”

He has no visible reaction at your words however it almost seems like his eyes glossed over for just a second before he speaks again “How do you mean?”

Standing up you walk over to Loki and kneel on the floor right in between the gods legs. “Don’t get any ideas, I can literally feel the promiscuity oozing off of you.”

“I have yet to say anything darling.”

Rolling your eyes you take Loki’s hands and place them on either side of your head with his thumbs sitting on your forehead. “Read my mind and you’ll see.”

Glancing down at you suspiciously, Loki stares into your eyes while he slowly drifts off into your subconsciousness. Meanwhile, you focus and hone in on the vision you saw earlier when the two of you first met. Eventually, one by one, the scenes begin to fly by.

No matter what time, what world, what universe the visions were in, it was always you and Loki in your truest form.

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

Next

A/N: okay so this is quite possibly my favorite series I've ever started, I was thinking about making it a slow burn but I'm too impatient for that, and I'm already halfway through part 2, but I'm also mentally ill so I have no idea when it'll actually get published. lmk if you want me to create a taglist & add you!

[tteokdoroki]

an ode to winter | dabi.

♡ pairing: dabi/touya todoroki x fem!reader.

♡ word count: 14.1K

♡ rating: mature, 18+, mdni.

♡ genre: manga war arc!au, single-parent!au, unplanned pregnancy!au,  angst, fluff, smut.

♡ summary: touya todoroki had broken a lot of things, your heart, promises, your window a few times, but you swore he'd never leave your child feeling that way. but when he wants back into your life, will he take no for an answer? And do you even want to say it?

♡ warning(s): please read ! heavy smut, ( literally 5k of it ), MANGA SPOILERS IN THE EXTENDED ENDING,  mentions of pregnancy, mentions of semi-toxic!relationships, struggling with parenting, blackmail ??,   unprotected sex ( wrap it before you tap it, losers ), handjobs, oral sex ( female receiving ), fingering ( female receiving ),  choking, branding, squirting, spit!kink, needy touya lol <3

♡ author’s note(s): OK so this started out as a fic for my bestie @ozzy-bozzy​ but then turned into this long ass vent fic bc i do be struggling!! i’ve barely written for touya so apologies if his character is off. special thanks to @bakugous-trauma for beta reading n @doinmybesthere for the summary and beta reading and thanks for 4.7K MWAH <3

♡ masterlist | requests

the snow had fallen heavy that day, its flakes dancing along the window panes while you’d brought her into the world. you hated the cold, the way it nipped at your nose and stung at your cheeks, how it could freeze over a heart so badly that it would take years to thaw it out. you’d complained about the ice sheets that frosted your windows to the doctors, the ones on the roads too, but they’d simply wrote it off as your anxieties related to bringing kori home for the first time in such weather.

funnily enough, your daughter much resembled the cold in many ways. you’d named her ‘kori’; meaning ice, since her hair was white as the crisp blanket of winter outside and her eyes a piercing shade of aqua marine, that for a while, had no meaning written behind them except for a cool curiosity that you knew didn’t come from your side of the family. she wasn’t warm either, the first time you held her, her flesh against yours was almost a painful spark of frostbite— you expected that it was related to the lineage she came from too.

you thought that you’d resent kori when she was born; for the struggles that her new life had brought to you. you’d given birth alone and afraid, having lost friends and contact with your family due to keeping your pregnancy a secret. if they had known who caused you to end up in this situation in the first place, you were sure you’d have lost them all anyways. you hadn’t a chance to attend maternity classes due to the hours you worked in order to ensure yourself and your child’s financial security. although, prior to her arrival, dabi had told you that if you chose to give your daughter the todoroki name; you both would be looked after when the right time came.

and like a fool in love, you’d believed him, avoiding the apologetic gazes of the doctors and midwives who’d delivered your baby as you filled out her paperwork and birth certificate. one nurse even asked you if you wanted to contact endeavour for support, and you couldn’t blame her— the rumours of your child potentially being that of natsuo todoroki’s had spread fast through the hospital and it was a given, figuring his bad boy college reputation. natsuo and his ventures into the college life were no stranger to the media, so it didn’t surprise you nor the doctors to believe that this wasn’t the first time a girl had given birth alone to a todoroki child. you suspected that if there were any, enji todoroki would have paid them off.

so you let them believe what ever false truth that might have plagued the hospital walls about yourself and your daughter— not having the heart to tell them that you’d probably receive a much larger sum of money to keep hush about the child that you mothered and the child who’s father belonged to endeavour’s deceased, eldest son.

so you realised, thumb held by the chubby hand of your sweet infant girl; that you couldn’t hate her for the mistakes you’d made and the mess you’d become tangled up in— you could only promise to do your best in raising her despite the odds and difficult circumstances, you could give her the life and childhood that her father never had but most certainly deserved.

“miss yn...”

your midwife; himari enters the room, calling for you— tearing your gaze away from the hypnotising sea-foam eyes belonging to your daughter, the way she looked at you only reminding you of dabi. you’d told him once that his eyes always took you to the mediterranean sea, to which he’d laughed and mentioned you’d never seen it before. when the pair of you realised that this was true, the boy with the black hair and intoxicating stare made an oath to you, that he would take you there someday so you could bask in the warm sun and dip your toes into the clear oceans. you only hoped that this oath still remained true.

“miss yn...” himari tries again, this time stepping further into your hospital room. your thoughts had carried you so far away that you hadn’t realised how close she’d gotten as she lingered by your cot. her hands lay flat against her pale blue uniform, nails you note—neatly trimmed— and a smile that would have made you feel comfortable had you not known she’d volunteered to care for you because she too believed she’d be paid off by endeavour. you almost felt bad that she thought the silly lie was true and that she had a shot at a big time bonus but it was funny to think that no one would believe her when she eventually took to the news to claim that she cared for the next heir of the todoroki empire. “it’s says here, that kori is scheduled for feeding— i was wondering if you wanted to continue breast feeding or try pumping a bottle or two today?”

chewing on the inside of your cheek, you hum with hesitance. feeding kori was something you’d never discussed with dabi, some of the nurses had assured you that it was possible for you to do both— so that you could grow closer to your daughter and form a tight bond whilst also giving the opportunity to others to feed her when need be. there weren’t many others, but you figured that dabi might want to give bottle feeding a whirl when he finally returned from the league business. the business that had made him miss his little girl’s birth.

kori gargles from hunger in your arms, drawing your attention back to her tiny form. a stray strand of hair curls against her forehead from underneath her blankets and swaddling— the end you notice has a slight tint of red to it. the icy shell around your heart thaws. glancing back up to himari; you grin with a decision in mind. “i’d like to try breast feeding again, we can use the pump tomorrow.” you say, voice quiet.

“do you need any help getting her to latch?” your midwife asks, aiding you into a comfortable position to feed kori.

“no,” you smile after getting settled, pushing down your gown to expose your breast to your little girl. “i’ve got her, i can take care of her.”

you say the words more so to yourself than to himari, a hidden reassurance that you’re more than capable of raising your daughter on your own.

for now at least.

that winter, dabi never came home.

the snow melts, the flowers bloom and the seasons change. your daughter grows with the swift transition of the weathers too, her hair is a little longer now but the small curl of red against her forehead remains hidden and the same. her eyes open wider, still that deep shade of ocean blue, she can sit up on her own, throws toys out of her crib  and her favourite movies are bambi and bambi two. they’re the only things that she watches, which you hate, because they remind you of her. an innocent child who loses one parent and is left in the care of the emotionally closed off other.

you hadn’t realised how much you would need dabi, but still he is nowhere to be seen.

raising kori on your own proves a challenge, especially now that she’s a little bigger— it was easy after she was born; she was quiet and only made a fuss when she was hungry or needed to be changed. went down easy too, that was until her wails reared their ugly head as soon as the colder parts of winter hit. no matter what you did, the girl would cry for hours on end until her face would hurt from how scrunched it was and her fingers would turn red from the grip she had on your hands.

since her birth, you and kori had to move three times due to the noise complaints about her consistent crying throughout the day, evening and night. by the time february rolled around, you’d ended up in an apartment not so far from dabi’s old neighbourhood— it was a shitty area with high crime rates and an eerie feel to it that made you clutch your purse tighter when you walked home from the late night shifts— you had never had any intentions to raise kori in a dump like this, you wanted a better life for her than what dabi had, but your shabby two bedroom apartment in the dark side of town would be enough for now.

the rent was cheap since your current boss at the local grocers market was close friends with the building manager, but your boss was also a sleaze who thought offering you an extra 10% off of your weekly shop and an expired coupon for the coffee joint down the street would be enough to get into your pants. he was just another thing on your list that you hated about the world, about the current life you lead but you needed to keep him close to keep your rent low and a roof over your head.

besides, it had been a few days since you last saw him at work— the asshole was probably taking a few days to himself while you and your colleagues practically ran the store.

you can’t leave kori with a sitter; they never worked with her. your daughter was far too temperamental for the average person and would spend one night with her before taking their pay and quitting. the only person able to handle your beloved little girl was the old lady who lived two floors above yours, mrs. yamamoto. she was a sweet woman, widowed by fifteen years and had taken a liking to kori that one time you’d helped with her groceries when she couldn’t make it out in the february winter after your little girl was born.

it seemed kori liked mrs yamamoto as well, she was only ever quiet in the woman’s presence and you put it down to how high she had the heat up in her apartment. one time, it was up so high the power in the building went out for an entire night— which was hell for you since kori wouldn’t stop bawling. however; you appreciated the help, you’re sure that without the help of the elder woman you would have been far under the surface— drowning in regret.

but sometimes, it’s easy for the darker emotions to slip through the cracks— take a choke hold over your sanity. there would be nights where guilt would consume you and tears would flow heavily down your cheeks while your daughter slept. it was hard being alone, no one to confide in about the troubles of parenting or to reassure you that you were doing a good job at taking care of your child.

it didn’t help that winter was coming up again, kori’s first birthday fast approaching. the sudden milestone only made you wish that dabi was around more — it hurt you to know that there was possibility he’d run out on you and his responsibilities as a father but part of you believed that your lover was better. the eldest todoroki son appeared way too excited throughout your pregnancy to leave you with nothing.

despite not being able to make it to appointments due to his criminal nature, dabi had somehow manged to find the money to get you a 4D ultra sound of your baby, telling you a few odd jobs here and there allowed him to scrape the cash together. you never asked what it was that he did, afraid of what you might find in the eyes of the man that you loved so much.

why did you allow yourself to love a man who wouldn’t have given you the time of day if he hadn’t broken into your home? his seafoam eyes a glowing shade as he threatened your life through shards of broken glass and then wails of cop sirens outside. were you just as broken as he? had you not realised it yet? you could blame this whole mess on the fact that he kept coming back, but you always let him back in. dabi was a broken man who only knew blood and grit and grime and you were the girl with a chance to lead a normal life— yet you poured all of your heart and all of your soul into loving him because you were so sure that you could fix him.

and every single time you’d convinced him, convinced yourself that what you had could be normal and domestic— dabi would slip between your sheets, pinning you to your bed with your name heavy on your lips and the emotion of love painted into the turquoise flecks in his eyes. they burned with passion while his heated cock sunk between your plush thighs and welcomed him into your warmth. the moans you’d share while your skin slapped together, creating a bubble of safety where you were the only two people on the world.

dabi made promises against your swollen lips as his fingers swirled hidden messages of desire into your slick, puffy clit. he couldn’t give you the ring, the wedding or the house with the white picket fence and dog barking at the post man in the front yard— but he could give you every part of him from the good to the bad, the beautiful to the ugly and he would seal that promise with a throaty groan of ‘you are mine and i am yours...’ into your ear as you came together.

but it seemed that like all things, dabi’s promises were broken like shattered glass— never meant to be kept or eternalised. the shards cut your delicate fingers, the pain numbed as you were left to pick up the pieces and be strong for the small life you were now responsible for.

you were careful to not let the door fly in and hit the wall opposite as you unlocked it, stumbling into your two bedroom with kori’s chubby legs locked around your hips and bag full of groceries in your other hand. “look princess,” you coo down at your daughter sweetly, watching as she drools all over your staff lanyard from work. “we’re home!” bending down, you dropped the produce off by the door before heading off to your living room area, propping kori in front of her toy mat.

smiling down at her, you brush the pure white hair that curls over her cobalt eyes and kiss her freckled cheeks— heart swooning at the way kori giggles in your arms. she’d been on her best behaviour the entire week, keeping out of trouble with the staff at her daycare and mrs yamamoto in the place upstairs, so it was only right that you treat her.

“you hungry babygirl? want mommy to make your favourite, hm?” kori is barely old enough to talk aside from a few babbles and repeats of mama but that doesn’t stop you from asking.

“mmmamamamaa!!”

you press another kiss to her baby fat cheeks before heading to the kitchen to prepare her favourite dinner— spaghetti. ever since kori started eating her solids, she hadn’t been a picky eater and you noticed that her appetite much resembled dabi’s, who couldn’t afford to be fussy about any of the meals you’d made for him before he disappeared.

making the sauce is easy, a dish you’d prepared from when you were a child and used to cook with your parents— you retrieve the ingredients from the groceries and pull out the stuff you’ll need to cook them. you mince the vegetables easily like you’d been taught as your mind gets away from you.

you wish that dabi was here to enjoy the domesticity of your current life— maybe him being around would lift the dark cloud over your life. sometimes it hurt to know that he would be missing out on moments like this and you could imagine him sitting by the couch while kori played with her toys and you cooked for them both. in this world, he’d laugh at her fascination with colder toys and magnets— make a joke about how much your little girl resembles him and kiss your cheek when you served them both up their favourite meals.

tears pool in your eyes at the thought of your wish never being granted and that’s all it takes for you to slip and cut your finger while chopping up the garlic. “fuck!” you boss, dropping the knife and squeezing your hand around the wounded digit. you know that the clattering of the knife has scared kori, and from the way she looks at you, you can already tell that she’s seen you injure yourself. “god, fuck...that hurt.”

there’s a pause in time, while you rinse your cut under the tap, cold water soothing the sting before kori starts to wail like her life depends on it. in a rush, you grab a tea towel in hopes that it’ll stop the bleeding and head straight for your baby, hoping that you’ll be able to soothe her. by the time you reach kori, her eyes are red with tears and snot dribbles from her nose down to her chin while she babbles loosely all the new words she’s learned— in a whiny tone.  

“baby, don’t cry mommy’s got you,” you murmur to her, reaching out to the little girl with open arms. your heart breaks at the way her bottom lip wobbles in a watery pout. kori crawls into your arms, white mop of soft baby hair buried into the junction between your shoulder and your neck— her tiny body shakes with awful heaves and cries while her tears dampen the old hoodie of her father’s that you wear, effectively ruining the fabric. “come on honey, it’s okay! momma didn’t mean to scare you...”

she snivels in your arms, quiet for only a second while you walk around the apartment bouncing her. walking kori up and down seems to soothe her for the most part, a trick that worked when she was first born and had her horrible crying fits. “good girl, mama’s got you...” you continue to soothe her, brushing a finger under her white lashes to remove her tears. all is well for a second and it seems her tantrum has calmed, until she grabs onto your wounded finger and makes you curse in pain again.

“shit!”

“m-momma-!” kori whimpers, face creasing in pain as her cheeks start to heat up again. you fear that if you don’t do something soon she’ll bust a lung from crying.

you shake your head in an attempt to calm her down, baby sobs striking right through your body and resume bouncing her, hoping that it’ll work. “shhh kori, honey, it’s okay— mommy’s okay and so are you...” in the process of comforting her, you somehow trip over the discarded knife, sending it flying into the cabinets across from the island and making another loud noise that further spooks kori.

at this she screams bloody murder, the sound of her little chest heaving giving you a splitting headache. you were tired, tired of your daughter’s crying , working long hours with no help and raising a child all on your own. you were tired of the pain spreading through your head and your body and your heart. you needed an out or break at the very least.

you should feel guilty for what you’re about to do, heading for the nursery with a heaving baby in your grip. you can’t think of anything better to do than put kori down for a nap and hope that her crying tires her out— you do your best to pry the little girl from clinging onto your clothes and tuck her into her crib as she sniffles, quickly backing out of her room before she can call for you and make you feel even worse than you already do.

you close the door quietly behind you, somewhat sliding down it while your own sobs take over your body— shaking you violently as you hug your knees to your chest. you don’t know how long you sit there, biting your lips and holding onto in your whimpers while tears stream down the apples of your cheeks, but eventually

you find yourself drifting off with dreams of your happy family.

you jump awake a few hours later, surrounded by a thick darkness from the sky outside. the hum of the city streets helps to bring you back down to earth as you rub the sleep from your puffy eyes and blink away the exhaustion. you don’t quite remember when you’d fallen into a slumber but you figure that kori must have eventually, judging by the quietness that surrounds your apartment.

the blanket of the night allows your guilt to burn brightly in your chest— you shouldn’t have left her alone. scrambling to your feet, you stumble over to the kitchen counter and grab your phone to read the time. 11:06pm. it’s just about time that you check on your daughter, but with two steps of heading to the nursery and you’re met with foreign sound that doesn’t quite fit in with the usual creaks and squeaks of your apparent.

happy gurgles belonging to your baby creep out from underneath her bedroom door, low humming or singing to accompany her sweet sound. humming that you don’t recognise. with a pang of fear to your heart, you reach for the knife on your kitchen floor as a weapon of defence— this would go down nicely with the police. a single mother on self defence...yeah, that could work out.

the knife shakes in your hand as you approach kori’s nursery, barely steady even when you push open the door.

“...touya?”

nothing could prepare you for what you’d see after walking into that room but when your eyes fall witness to your love standing in the centre of the room with a little tuft of white hair cradled to his bare chest. the air around you tingles with warmth as if dabi has heated the place up with his quirk and your little girl curls into him as if she’s known him all her life. but she hadn’t, he hadn’t.

all at once, your heart heals just as it breaks— it’s been so long since you’ve seen the villain that you can’t help but notice all the changes in him, the way his eyes droop a little more with exhaustion and his hair dusted with a the slightest bit of white. he was noticeably thinner too, maybe from being away from a warm bed and good food for too long...so a half of you was relieved that he was home, the other— hurt and betrayed.

“hey beautiful,” dabi’s timbre voice fills your entire being, stimulating your senses into a dull tingle. his lips a drawn into soft smirk as he rocks kori back and forth, your  baby’s eyes flutter with the gentle indication of sleep. “how’ya been?”

if you weren’t frozen in shock, you would have given the villain a piece of your mind. how dare he...after all this time apart from you, from his daughter...ask how you were doing? your eyes flutter to the open window behind the oldest todoroki son, as if you need to look away from him to convince yourself he’s real and he won’t disappear when you look back.

proven right by meeting the cool, chartreuse sea of his eyes— your throat runs dry as all you’d ever dreamed of saying in this moment, flees from your mind. “what are you doing here?” you say, trying to sound firm even though your voice falls through.

touya stays quiet, twirling a long finger through the small curls on his—your daughter’s head. “i was in the neighbourhood.” he mumbles, gaze tearing away from you to focus on the content infant he has in his arms.

you should feel angry, you should be screaming and kicking at dabi— forcing him out of your home with your child safe in your own arms but your body doesn’t will you to. hurt seeps through your veins at the casual aura in his tone. of course dabi would treat the situation as if it never existed and that he’d been with you the whole time. the pain of seeing him with her as if he’d been in kori’s life from the very start wraps around your heart in a poisonous grip and squeezes hard until you’re choking back a sob, letting it sit in the base of your throat.

you refuse to break in front of him.

“you need to go. you need to put her down and you need to leave.” you attempt to assert yourself in a harsh bark, almost making dabi jump. he’d never seen you like this before, but then again he hadn’t seen you in a year. he could only imagine what motherhood had done to you, especially facing it on your own. touya hesitates, kori shifting in his soft grip— one he didn’t even know that he had as a villain but you steady yourself and repeat your words. “touya, i said you need to leave.”

“why? so you can fall asleep and leave her crying on her own again?” the villain spits out, harsher than he intended. he watches your face fall and your body curl in on itself and he feels bad. dabi had promised you a lot of things since realising he loved you, and not hurting you like his father hurt his mother was one that he’d just broken. relenting, the dark haired villain eases kori from his pec and tucks her into her crib.

there’s a beat of silence and then. “i’m sorry.”

“you should be.”

“yn,” he sighs, running a hand through the light roots of his hair as he leans over his child’s crib. the young father tilts his head, scanning kori’s face while he identifies every characteristic she has from the family he’d done his best to free himself of.   “i’m sorry, it’s just— just that she was cold and crying, so i took off my shirt and held her and she warmed up and—“ dabi pauses his quiet rambling, finally looking up from the slumbering baby tucked away into powder blue silk and locks eyes with you. “and she probably has my mom’s shitty quirk. and i can’t get over how much she looks like them, how big she’s gotten.”

touya finds his shirt after admitting that, throwing on the thin white material before closing the window he came through. he moves with the swiftness that comes with his job, and it’s almost peaceful to watch. you stay plastered by the door, torn between falling right into the palm of his hand and demanding the answers that you and your daughter deserve.

it makes you feel a little sick when he gazes down at kori with pride, it makes you queasy at how easy she was to handle to him. touya todoroki doesn’t know half of what it was to raise his child...but did that make you a bad mother? was there something he shared with kori that you didn’t? dabi hadn’t known what it was to love someone other than himself until he’d met you, but you’d spent your entire life around family and friends who took care of you and made you feel cherished every day. you had all of that before you had dabi, and you’d given it all up for him.

shouldn’t you be the one to easily put your daughter down for a nap? to soothe her tears? and for him to come so briskly into your lives and take care of it all when he doesn’t even know what you’d been through, hurts most of all.

“you don’t even know her,” you start, tremble to your bottom lip as the sob in your throat builds up and threatens to burst. “you never saw her after she was born, never cut the cord, never knew her weight. you don’t know how tiny she was when she came into the world, you don’t know because you didn’t come!” with each word, stray tears manage to escape from your tired eyes, but you’re too fixated on dabi to bother to wipe them. it hurts to cry, it stings even as they stream down the apples of youth cheeks but you don’t move.

“yn, sweetness, i—“

“i know how much she weighed when she was born, four pounds and thirteen ounces. she was so tiny i was scared that she would break—“ you’re gasping now, almost choking yourself out on the pain that burns brightly in your lungs and claws its way up your throat. “i know her favourite foods, what fabrics irritate her skin, her favourite stuffed toys, how she likes to be swaddled in her blankets at night or that her curls make her face itch but they’re practically untameable.”

you start to heave, losing breath with every word and dabi does nothing but watch, keeping an eye on kori to make sure she stays sleeping as he steps towards you. “i know that i love her more than i’ve loved anything in my entire life, despite how much i suffered alone bringing her into this world. and i know that i named her kori after the ice that frosted the windows of my hospital room while i waited for... you.”

touya remains emotionless while you descend into madness, letting you cry it out. “i’ve been watching...”

you want to scream, beat his chest and blame him for how insane you’ve become. “watching isn’t enough touya, she needed you. i-i needed you.” you whimper, falling limp against the door frame as your hands move threateningly towards your hair as if you’re going to rip it out from the root. “...you couldn’t come and visit? not once i-in the eleven months that she’s been alive? not once while she’s been breaking me down and giving—“

“giving you a hard time? i tried, i took care of you from afar...i’m the one who made your boss disappear. the one who put his hands on you.” dabi sneers towards the end of his once gentle words, standing a breaths width away from you. you hate that you crave the same touch from him as he gave to kori, but you’re still so mad at him.

eventually, it all becomes too much and you succumb to the tears that wrack your exhausted body. you sway with each choked wail that tumbles from between your chapped lips and dabi surges forward to catch you after kicking the knife from earlier away, letting you sink into the warmth of his embrace. he feels like home, smells like safety and not a word is uttered as he brings you to the floor and cradles you like he did with his daughter.

dabi doesn’t need to say sorry when he shows you through how close he holds you to his heart.

when you finally calm down, dabi lifts you bridal style to your bathroom and draws you a bath with the salts and lavender extract from the cupboard above the sink. neither of you speak except for when he softly offers to help you undress— to which you decline— and when he tells you he’s going to fix something to eat.

you knew damn well that the villain could not cook, he hadn’t been when he was little since endeavour took away the entirety of his childhood and you’d only taught him the basics when he was still on the run and stopped by your place from time to time. his favourite thing back then had been to watch you cook to the weird music you kept playing, hips swaying to the beat and a sparkle in your eyes— but you didn’t do that anymore, he could tell those days were long gone.

dabi orders in takeout in the end and you have half a mind to curse him out for using your money— but the day’s events have exhausted you beyond your wits end, so you eat with him in silence atop your double bed after dressing in an old shirt of his. “stay the night.” is what you tell him, scared that he’ll leave. he puts his cigarette out on your balcony. the doors usually stayed locked so kori couldn’t crawl out on her own but you opened it for him since dabi liked to smoke and you hated the ash.

he promised to quit back then, and he hadn’t now.

“i’ll stay.” dabi says, throwing the butt over the ledge and stripping his clothes as he follows you to bed. he decides not to mention he wanted to stay anyway. you peel back the covers enough for him to slip in behind you, heated arms wrapping around your waist and settling on your tummy, where he rubs small patterns into your skin. the villain’s chest is  overwhelmingly warm against your back— reminding you of the days where you would spoon and he’d wait with baited breath for kori to kick.

both of you lay together, wide awake in the dark for goodness knows how long. touya’s breath balmy against the nape of your neck and if you focused hard enough, you could feel his eyelashes fluttering against your skin. he pretends to sleep, refusing to acknowledge that his proximity to you affects him in the worst of ways— evident in how his prominent hard on presses against the swell of your ass.

rolling over, your heart skips a beat at the way your love’s eyes still manage to glow brightly in the dark— ignited by the flames of his quirk and emotions of angst from the past.

they flicker as he looks to you, pale skin illuminated by the silver moon slipping in from your balconies, scars as enticing as ever. tentatively, you reach a hand out to cup his face, not kidding the apprehension that paint his matured features even as you run your fingers down the scars on his jaw. “been a while since we’ve been like this,” is all you can muster up, leaning forward to press a kiss to his cheek while your free hand snakes between your bodies in an attempt to pleasure the man.

fear strikes you right in the chest, leaving you panting as dabi flips you onto your back quickly, pinning your wrists against the bed. “don’t,” he growls, almost feral in tone and in his eyes. “don’t do something you might regret in the morning.”

you lay still, staring at the man above you in an attempt to read him. doing so had always been hard, but tonight you can see every detail of his life and every part of him.  the fear of being his father and disappointing another group of people, a broken man torn between the people he loved and the life he led— you could finally see him. you wondered if it hurt him to be away from you and his child, if he ever thought of you.

you take a deep breath, fabric of the sheets fuzzy in your ears as you shake your head up at him. “i could never regret being with you,” you sigh, dabi’s gaze lowering. “i just need you...”

your proclamation is all the permission dabi needs before he ascends on your neck, almost whimpering at the taste of your skin against his tongue. you know that he’s avoiding your lips, scared that things may not feel the same if he kisses you there— as if your love might have fizzled out from the months that you’ve been apart. the villain’s mouth is hot against your skin, sharp teeth sinking into the column of your throat— it’s not hard for him to find the spots that make your back arch and body tingle, the dark haired man  would be embarrassed to admit that he had your body mapped out in his brain. you were all that he thought about in the months between then and now.

you miss his lips, but you fear that if you push your love to far he’ll clam up and withdraw from you completely. you can’t lose him while you have him now. in the meantime, your bodies press against one another hotly, burning while dabi paints shades of blue and purple deeper than his eyes against your flesh before lapping at each love bite with an odd tenderness people wouldn’t think he possessed at first glance. as he works, touya loses grip on your wrists, allowing them free roam across the expanse of his back.

your nails leave light tracks across his back, trailing up from his muscled back to the nape of his neck— curling in the white roots of his hair in an attempt to tug him up to your lips. “baby,” the old pet name tumbles from between them before you can catch yourself, laboured from where you’re short of breath. “please kiss me, please..”

with newly mussed hair, dabi is still for a moment before leaving one last mark at where your jaw meets your neck— wet tongue lolling over the fresh bruise while his large palm move back to cup your head. a thumb belonging to a scared hand runs over your bottom lip, pulling the plump flesh down while he watches your face for a reaction. “are you sure that’s what you want, beautiful?” the villain chuckles into the dark of the night, pink muscle running over his own lips to wet them in anticipation. “you want your man to kiss you?”

your senses go into overdrive, desperate for any kind of contact from the man above you— he feels so close and yet, a million miles away, even with his body making its way between your thighs and your chests pressing together eagerly.

“touya—“ you breathe, barely able to finish your sentence before the man himself delves deep into your mouth. his lips move with hesitance at first, sucking on yours slightly and parting for air more often than he should but you grip him by the whites of his hair firmly and tug him further into the kiss. your tongue dances along the seam of his lips, prying them open as you seek permission for entrance— dabi groans lowly as you tug on his roots and force your way into his mouth, tasting him as if it were your last time.

you swallow each of his moans that mingle softly with your own, while your tongues dance together messily— the kiss were and sloppy as if the two of you were out of practice. your worries fly out of the window from there, it’s good to know that neither of you had been with others during your time apart instead you feel like a teenager making out with their highschool crush for the very first time. dabi’s hips rut into the plush bed beneath you both and you can tell that even the slightest touches are riling him up beyond belief— it’d been almost a year since he’d felt you against him in any way and it didn’t help that you were so ready to accept him.

that you still wanted him.

whimpering at the thought, the villain pauses against your lips to catch his breath— panting softly. you can feel him pulling away, questioning if he deserves to be with you after everything he’d put you through. so, cupping dabi’s jaw, you let your free hand slip between your heated bodies and glide your fingertips along the waist band of his sweats.

“yn, i ain’t so sure about this,” dabi sighs, body twitching at the proximity of your hands to his hardness, his eyelids flutter shut and lock away his beautiful blue eyes— holding fear, insecurity and desire. “what if ya’still regret this later on?”

smiling up at him, you thumb at his cheek and work your hand deeper into his pants, past his underwear. “you’ve been away too long baby, i would regret not being with you more,” you coo up at him just as you grasp at his hardened length, watching as dabi shudders in your grip. his cock leaks hotly against your soft palm from going untouched for so long, your fingers explore him— tracing down the thick veins on the underside of his length. “let me make you feel good tonight.”

“fuck, sweetness. talk pretty with that filthy fuckin’ mouth of yours.” touya breathes heavily against your mouth, both of yours falling open in hot moans. cheekily, you run a thumb over his tip, circling the slit at the top. dabi collapses on top of you, burying his mop of salt and pepper hair into your neck as he drives his hips into your hand at his own leisurely pace. “y’better live up to those words—shit, don’t go letting me down, princess.” jade orbs finally open, heavy with lust and desire as the air around you tingles with a newfound desire to make each other feel good, settling on the planes of your marked and scratched skin.

your grip around dabi tightens while he fucks into your closed fist, wet sounds filling the room from where he leaks at his bright red tip— almost hot as his hands that dance up your sides and tenderly touch at your hips. so unsure, yet so needy. clear, thick precum guides the movement of your hand as it slides up and down your lover’s girth— he’s much bigger than you remember, swollen with an impending orgasm and dabi stutters when you reach further down his boxers to grip at weighty balls full of his seed, just about ready to burst.

he howls from deep within his chest, the noise only muffled from the drool that glides across his tongue before the villain’s wandering and scarred palms stop at your rib cage, settling just under your breasts. you don’t bother to stop pleasuring him even as his quirk ignites, blue flames burning right through your night shirt to expose your skin to the cool night air.  without even a second thought, dabi’s mouth ascends on your tits, taking one into the hot cavern while his free hand seers marks over the other.

the thought have being branded by your man makes your hips jump and your hand squeeze his cock in your grip— a reminder of what’s to come later on. his strawberry tongue rolls across your hardened nipple and you yelp in surprise with the sudden feeling of cool metal across the exposed flesh. “y-you have your tongue pierced?” you squeal as dabi repeats his actions, loving the way you arch your back into his mouth and your heart rate speeds up.

“never know when a bit of metal’s gonna come in handy, sugar tits.”

you barely have time to formulate a response before your boyfriend’s mouth is back on you, biting and sucking and marking your raw flesh like a man starved of his last meal— you don’t let up either, quickly pumping his cock as he continues to leak, painting your hand with teases of his incoming release. you’re sure that his sweatpants and the sheets below you will be stained with his arousal from how much precum oozes from his dick, slicking up your hands and creating the perfect flashlight but you don’t dare to think of anything else but the way dabi’s face twists with pleasure as he desperately thrusts himself into the softness of your palm.

his cheeks flush red, globs of drool connecting the roof of his mouth to his tongue while his eyes grow fuzzy at each step he takes closer to orgasm, the very drool from his mouth covers each of your breasts as dabi switches between them— creating a layer of wet against your supple skin that shines under the moon. you flick your wrist around him, faster, harder— giving the villain everything you’ve got to make him feel good.

“shit pretty girl, y’gonna make me...cum,” touya shakes in your grip, eyes crossing and tongue becoming lazy against your marked up chest. his salvia pools against your skin while he pants and fucks your wet hand as if it were your pretty little cunt clamping down on him. “fuck, fuck, fuck. don’t you fuckin’ stop, don’t you dare fuckin’ stop...”

he barks out the demands, but there’s a neediness to his tone and whine to his voice that makes you grin with pride, even if you’re barely there from having your nipples stimulated beyond belief. “cum for me touya, please, wanna feel you come undone for me.” you beg him, ever so slightly and it’s just enough to push the villain over the edge, sending him into an earth shattering orgasm. you don’t dare to stop as you jerk him off, guiding down from his high as his cock twitches from release and paints your knuckles with the thick white of his seed. he mewls contendly into your breasts, slowing his hips while the world of colours dance behind his cerulean eyes.

“here with me yet?” you murmur to him, grasping his wild locks to tilt his head up towards your face— dabi looks so blissed out but the smirk on his raw and bitten lips tells you the night is far from over.

pressing a searing kiss to your sternum, your boyfriend’s pierced tongue makes yet another appearance as he trails the muscle down your soft tummy— biting your navel as he goes. “never left gorgeous, but don’t you fucking dare think for a second that this is over, y’got that?” he sits up quickly, grabbing hold of your doughy thighs and using them to pull you down the bed. the pads of his fingers start to burn marks into your skin, dancing along your legs and stopping just above the waistband of your underwear. “gotta stretch this cunt open before i give you my cock, remind you of who the fuck you belong to.”

spreading your thighs nice and wide, you release a breath you hadn’t realised you’d been holding as dabi’s hands finally come into contact with your slit, prodding at your slick folds from over your panties. lowering his face between your open legs, your boyfriend hums in satisfaction as he peels your sticky panties away from your pussy. “why, babydoll, you’re so fucking wet down here. this can’t all be for me, can it?” touya teases you, hot breath fanning against your unused sex while his fingers play with the string of your slick that coats them. “y’must’ve missed your man badly for your lil cunt to look this fucked up, s’pecially when i haven’t even touched’ya yet.”

you shiver and nod weakly, willing to say or do anything to feel more of your boyfriend against you. “s’all for you dabi, o-only you could get me this wet, n-no one else could take your place...” you mewl, hips bucking into the air while the man himself watches you grow needier and needier, hormones expelled into the air. dabi grins, leaning into your core once more to press his nose into your wetness, sniffing your spiked panties like the dirty man he is— only to then lay his pierced tongue flat against your folds, tracing your hole with the muscle while his nose bumps at your clothed clit.

“saved this all for me, huh? you’re so loyal, sweetness. waiting for me all this time…” he kitten licks at your cunt until you’re writhing amongst the already solid sheets, forcing his spit into your hole from over the thin fabric of your panties, creating a more prominent outline of your puffy lower lips as your thighs quieter around his head. they threaten to close as he works on you through your underwear— teasing and prodding at your sex to see if you respond the same way to his touches as you used to.

you force your shaking through his black and white locks, grabbing hold of his roots in an attempt to pull dabi back to your heat when he lifts his head from between your thighs— pushing your lips into a pout. “no, no no, baby, please— need you to eat my cunt, want your mouth on me, please!” you cry out, but you’re quickly pacified by his scarred hand which cups your pussy— seat of his hand grinding into your clit.

“god, if i had known you were still this eager to fuck me i woulda come home a long time ago, babydoll.” he chuckles, licking up your inner thigh and biting down on the plush flesh. “need’ta get rid of these though, they’re getting in my way.” the villain gestures to your panties, making you watch as his quirk burns it’s way through the silky material until it’s nothing but ash against your sheets. you gasp as soon as your cute little pussy is exposed to the cool air, missing the warmth of touya’s pink tongue against it. “better.” he sneers, eyes bright and glowing in the dark with a new sense of feral desire.

thick digits press into your tight hole at the same time touya takes to sucking on your swollen clit, forcing their way up your velvet walls in search for your pleasure spot. dabi chuckles against your sticky folds as you begin to whine, hips rolling up into your lover’s face while his tongue draws rough patterns onto your bud. you’ve missed him, missed this. the nights where the villain dabi would sneak into your home, becoming your touya todoroki between the four walls that you shared— where you would spend nights seeing stars by his hand or his cock and he would make you his over and over again. the memories have you clamping down on his digits like there’s no tomorrow, greedily sucking them in as he strokes at the walls of your sex and makes your whole body shake.

touya works hard at pleasuring you, apologising for his absence through slurping the juices from your folds only for you to gush and paint his scarred chin with more of your nectar. the way you taste makes him dizzy, he could spend the rest of his life between your thighs and never miss the outside world like he did before tonight. he wants to be good for you, make you feel good too and it’s not enough to feel the ecstasy roll off of your heavenly body in waves— he wants all of you, mind, body and soul to belong to him.

you can barely breathe, leaking with every swipe of his tongue against you and every twist of his fingers inside of you. you can feel everything at once, the euphoria crackling across your brain, high on the way touya makes you feel. “god, t-touya, don’ stop...feel so fucking good…” you heave in a drawn out moan, barely able to tell what’s up and what’s down as the villain pulls his fingers from your slick hole and replaces them with his tongue ( only after they’ve pushed down on your g-spot over and over again ).

“you’re not the one giving orders, sweet stuff, oh no.” dabi reminds you sloppily, looking like a child with no table manners as your nectar smears across his face. for his own satisfaction, he delivers a harsh smack to your pussy, watching as your entire body jolts and jumps up the bed. “your cunt is mine and i’ll do what i want with it, show you how much i missed it.”

his possessive words almost set you off, the knot in your stomach growing tighter with every pinch of your nub and every swirl on his tongue inside your walls, committing every ridge to memory. your body burns and you’re not sure if it’s from dabi pressing against you so hotly or because of the desire that fuels the fire inside you.

“yours, yours, yours!” you chant like a mantra, high pitched and whiny— your voice mixing with the crude sounds of your own pathetic cunt, that grows louder when dabi spits on your clit to add to your wetness. he lets it drip between your folds, fingers to busy with stimulating you to catch it before it slides between your lower cheeks, opting to use his tongue on you instead.

“ya’like that don’t you? missed your whinin’ pretty girl, fuck, even missed making you a fucking mess.” you keen into his touch, babbling incoherent praises to the man between your legs as he spreads you wider by the ass with one hand and forces his fingers back into your cunt with the other. his fingers curl into a come hither motion, repeatedly pressing down on your spongy spot as he sloppily makes out with your puffy nub— taking only one, two, three strokes to make your eyes roll into the back of your skull and your orgasm to wash over you.

your body convulses, shaking as you’re hit hard by your release— juices gushing all over your lover’s face even as he refuses to let up. “t-touya no...no no...can-can’t,” you whinge, tears clumping in your lashes. dabi spreads your lips again, using three digits instead of two to continue stimulating your clit until another release builds up inside your lower belly— clear liquid gushing out of your abused pussy and staining the sheets below.

he hums proudly, pressing a lasting kiss to your fluttering hole before reaching up to your lips to do the same, barely allowing you the time to catch your breath— chest heaving while you come down from your high. “so pretty when you squirt for me like that, sweetness,” dabi moans into your mouth, allowing you to taste yourself on him. but as soon as he comes, he’s gone— rolling you onto your stomach and lifting your hips so your ass sits in the air for him. “gonna take my cock now, kay?”

“kay,” you mumble into the sheets, brain too  fuzzy to resist as the villain manhandles you the way he wants.

after shoving down his sweatpants, the eldest todoroki grips the peachy soft flesh of your ass— smacking it a few times with his heat activated palms to watch the flesh jiggle and his handprint sink into the skin. you lean back, watching over your shoulder as his cock stands at full attention, hard from seeing you come undone on his fingers and tongue. it burns bright red at the tip, another fat glob of precum making it shine and making you dribble with anticipation. “y’such a fuckin’ slut, my beautiful slut… hungry for my cock even after i’ve wrecked your lil pussy so bad,” dabi says with a cocky lilt to his voice, the very tone making your hole clench around nothing. he taps his sticky cockhead against your slit, running it up and down your cunt three or four times— groaning as it slides between your cheeks. the sensation causes your back to arch as you wail, fingers gripping the bed covers so tight that you almost cause them to tear. “don’t you worry baby, ‘m gonna make up for lost time, you don’t have to miss me anymore.”

there’s a double meaning to his words that you don’t ask him to elaborate on, too caught up in the way he teases your hole as he dips his length in— only to pull it right back out. “don’t tease, need you badly,” you plead, earning yourself another harsh spank to your raw ass cheeks.

“shut the fuck up and let me fuck you,” the words are harsh against his tongue, but dabi utters them softly as he relents to his wishes. his cerulean gaze flutters down to where your bodies begin to join, his large hand gripping his length before he starts to push into your dribbling entrance. “god, you’re s’fuckin’ tight, you might as well be a virgin.” pussy spasming at his words, you leak against touya’s cock, creating a lewd squelching sound as he pushes more of himself into you. the weight of dabi’s thick girth causes painful, yet delicious burn which he eases by rubbing soothing circles into your clit once more. “been s’long, i outta fuck you open again, huh?”

“uhuh, take me again touya. make me yours, all over again.” you slur over the spit drowning your tongue, eyes fluttering shut when the villain’s hips surge forward his dick brushes against your cervix. his rough, calloused palm grabs your neck from behind, forcing you down into the sheets while he bottoms out inside of you and pushes the last of his cock past your entrance. the two of you groan in unison, touya sitting heavy inside of your walls before you muster up the energy to say. “move.”

he doesn’t need to be told twice, whilst dabi was enjoying the feeling of being engulfed by your soft, warm insides— cock twitching in relief from time to time— he finds it within him to pull back from your selfish cunt to thrust into you with all his might. the force pulls a broken squeal from between your bitten and bruised lips, your hips pushing back against dabi to keep him inside of you. the pair of you move in sync, bodies dancing in a sensual grind between lovers that moulds your cunt into the shape of your boyfriend once more. “oh fuck yeah baby, oooh, missed your cunny s’bad…” dabi yowls loudly, listening for the squashy sounds of your sexes moving against one another. “christ, you like when i talk about your pathetic little pussy like this?”

you bite down on your lower lip, embarrassed by your own bleats of pleasure when he degrades you like this. annoyed by your lack of answer, touya grabs onto your hips and pulls you off of his cock, only to slam them back into you seconds later. his pace is unforgiving and relentless from there, forcing your body up the bed with every thrust into your core. “yes! like it, love it, missed your cock so bad touya!” you cry, holding onto the sheets for dear life as his dick drags along your pleasure spots and his hands burn marks into your ass and hips.

weakly, you attempt to match his thrusts. circling the meat of your ass back onto dabi and squeezing around the head of his girth every time it plunges into your sopping pussy. your arousals mix as he pounds away at your hole, a thick string hanging between your bodies and dribbling down your inner thighs, tainting innocent skin. the wet noise reverberates across the room, creating a passionate symphony with dabi’s deep, pitiful moans.

even though it had been a while since the two of you had been intimate like this, dabi still knew all the ways to get your body going. he took you from behind but still let his marred hands wonder and explore the planes of your skin, pinching here and there, marking your body as his to use and his alone. there’s love hidden beneath his rough touches, little signs that he missed having you so close to him— having you split open on his cock while you dripped on his pelvis and ruined your bedsheets, was his own way of unleashing his pent up emotions of love, anger and despair onto you and you wanted it. you wanted his good and his bad while he fucked you like his life depended on it, balls deep inside the pussy of the woman he loved was where he was most vulnerable with you.

“s-shit, sweetness, you’re such a pretty mess, so fucked up on my cock, can feel you clamping around me like my greedy bitch should.” you’re stuffed so full, clenching every time touya drives his cock deeper into your gummy cunt, head prodding at the sensitive bundle of nerves inside of you. he’s losing his mind at how you choke out his iron hot girth, clear liquid seeping down your thighs at every thrust. “you’re my beautiful brain dead baby, letting me fuck you like this, yeah? missed you baby, missed this,” despite his words, touya is no better than you, mind hazy with thoughts of you creaming around him because of how good he’s made you feel. him, and no one else. you saved yourself for him after all these months, the least he could do was bring you to cloud nine.

he does so by angling his thrusts up to meet your pleasure spot every time, howling your name in the way he knows you like just to feel your hot cunny spew more of your juices out against his tummy. “missed you, thought about this for months,” you lament, elbows that kept you up finally giving out as your body tiredly collapses into the sheets— dabi’s balls still clapping against your ass. he follows you down into bed covers, chest pressing hotly against your back as the jackhammers into you from behind. “thought about your fat cock in my tight pussy, t-touched myself to you...made being alone worth it, made waiting for you to come home worth it. ‘cause i get to see your beautiful face when you fuck me…” you barely register what you’re saying, babbling incorrectly while the temperature of your body rises with your level of arousal.

behind you, touya’s cheeks burn with a new feeling. deep down, all he wanted was to be validated as a lover to you, he’d always been deemed as the bad guy incapable of feeling anything for anyone other than himself. but you, you had proved him wrong so many times and he still found your words hard to believe. yet, it felt good to know how much you loved him. snaking a hand down to your face, the villain squishes your cheeks together and brings you up to his own face despite the arch to your back— he keeps up his sinful pace, your lower cheeks bouncing with every push and pull of his length while he drips a globule of his saliva into your pouting mouth. “shut up,” he grunts harshly, although love is written across his cobalt eyes.

you smile up at him dopily, keeping eye contact with him as you swallow gratefully. “anything for you,” his hands slip from your squashed cheeks to your throat, cupping it as he holds you against him. more arousal pools in your lower stomach, turned on by the thrill of him being able to end your life right then and there, all it would take would be one flame but you know more than anything that dabi loves you and would never hurt you. “i love you, touya todoroki. i a-always will.”

your admission makes dabi’s heart stop in his chest, heated pants tickling your ear as he continues to take you and claim your body as his. with newfound vigor, he links his free hand with yours that lays against the bed and rams his cock into your core as hard and as fast as he can, determined to make you cum. “i—oh fuck, i love you too, sweetness…” the arsonist can feel the way your cunt flutters around his girth at his confession, tears building up in your eyes once more. god, you were so pretty like this, arched for him perfectly in the moon, stars illuminating every curve and dip on your body— showing off the stretch marks from where you’d carried his child. everything about you turned him on in the best possible ways and everything about you that turned him on, also turned out to be everything he loved about you.

your stupid big heart, your stupid big eyes when you say that you love him, your stupid smile when he used to kiss you and hold you and even now when he fucked you. touya todoroki was in love and in the worst possible way but he couldn’t say he regretted a single moment of it, not when you stayed true to him after all these months of being apart. you raised his child and you loved him all the same and a part of him is grateful that you never turned your back on him like everyone else he’s ever loved.

so the least he could do is make love to you, push his creamy cock into the depth of your core while kissing down your spine to watch you shudder oh so cutely. it’s messy and sloppy and the pair of you should feel nasty for the stench of sex in the air, lingering against your skin. but you don’t, how could you? not when love and adoration tingles in the air as well, it’s messy because of the unadulterated emotions you feel for one another— deep in vulnerability is where dabi grinds his cock slowly into you, hitting all the right places that make you scream his name into the night. makes him mumble incoherent praises against your bruised neck and squished cheeks as he lewdly licks a stripe up the column of your neck to behind your ear.

you gush around him and he grunts with ecstasy into your ear, tightening that knot in your stomach as you both step closer to your highs. “you like the way i fill this cunt up, huh? yeah? when i hold you like this, when i fuck you like this?” dabi mutters to you lewdly, holding onto his sanity by a thin thread as his own release sneaks up on him. “tell me you like it...fuck sweetness, please.”

“i love the way you fuck me touya, fuck! only you can make me feel this good,” you moan to appease him, bouncing back against his cock while his hips begin to stutter and your eyes begin to cross. it’s true, you love belonging to him, being able to bring him such pleasure and you know he feels the same way. the villain prods at your g-spot over and over again, stealing your breath away as he pulls you up and into your chest, changing the angle of his hips to bring you to the last hurdle. “baby—ohmygod—-touya! ‘m sososo close, don’t stop...don’t stop, gonna cum, give it to me, give it to me please!” you chant, eyes fluttering shut as you lean your head back against his shoulder and search for his hand, voice rising with every octave as you get closer and closer.

“fucking cum for me sweet girl, shit, cum all over this fucking cock.” dabi manages through gritted teeth, grasping your hand while the pace of his thrusts grow inconsistent.

that’s all that you need to hear before the damn breaks and arousal floods through your entire body courses through your veins. white dances behind your eyes in flashes as your release flushes out of your pussy and drips between touya’s balls, coating them in a layer your honeyed slick. you slump against your boyfriend, not able to mutter a word as you convulse in a silent scream and squeeze both his hand and cock alike.

gently, he pushes you down to the bed and pulls his cock from your intoxicating heat— his free hand clasps around his cock, palming himself towards a swift release. “yeah, oh fuck yeah, fuckin’ love you baby,” he cums on your back and your ass, thick, potent and milky seed landing on your flushed skin before he collapses beside you and exhaustion settles in his bones.

you black out for a few minutes after, fingers still intertwined but dabi manages to slip out long enough to retrieve a washcloth that's damp and warm to clean you both up with. you wake up just as he crawls back into bed with you, kissing your hairline while he makes himself comfortable. “almost thought i’d killed you for a second,” the villain jokes, slinging a loose arm over your bare waist and pulling you to lay on his chest.

“you couldn’t, even if you tried.” you counter sleepily, drawing star shapes on your boyfriend’s naked stomach. a comfortable silence sweeps over the room, despite the thoughts that linger on your mind. looking up at dabi, you notice him drifting off but still can’t help the words that slip from your lips. “why didn’t you ever come back?”

you feel dabi’s chest rise and fall with a deep sigh, fingers coming up to scratch at your scalp— something that used to help you to sleep when you were together before. “i was figuring out a way to get out of the league, to be with you and kori.” he says after some time, catching your eye as you give him a confused look. “shigaraki doesn’t know about her, i never told him. but i knew from the moment we found out about her, i didn’t want her to be a part of the life i’m involved in and knowing how the league works, they’d find a way to make use of her.”

you stay quiet, not knowing what to do with the new information and dabi’s reasoning for staying away for so long. on one hand you were grateful to him for keeping your daughter quiet and safe but part of you still wished he’d given you a sign to let you know it’d all be okay. grabbing your chin, he forces you to look up at him—passionate flames burning in his eyes. “i need you to trust me on this one sweetness, i promise nothin’ will happen to you nor kori. so long as i’m around.”

“pinky promise?” you ask him sweetly, feeling the truth to his words.

you hold up your pinky to the villain’s face, smiling through exhaustion as he rolls his eyes down at you. “pinky promise, babydoll. now get some shut eye, kay?” touya links your pinky with his, scoffing when you make him kiss them.

“g’night, touya.”

“sleep well, babydoll.”

the bed is cold when you wake up the next morning.

the panic sets in quickly, speeding up with the chirping of birds from your balcony outside. you shouldn’t be tearing up over the childishness of a pinky promise. he always made you promises but never actually kept the and as quickly as dabi had waltzed back into your life, he had left you alone and in the cold once more.

gathering yourself together, you stumble out of your bed— avoiding any mirrors that may show the cascade of marks dabi had left against your skin from the previous night. you feel embarrassed and ashamed that you let him back into your life so easily, especially now that you had kori to think about. tears start to well in your tired and puffy eyes as you head to the kitchen, thinking that a mug of coffee will calm you down before you prep your daughter for the day.

but as you wander out of your room, the familiar sound of your baby girl’s laugher drifts through the air— seemingly coming from the kitchen.  the sweet melody calls out to you and suddenly your casual stride to the kitchen becomes a brisk walk so you can reach her faster. “kori? baby? did you climb out of your crib again—?” you call out to her, stopping in your tracks when you round the corner.

dabi stands in the middle of your kitchen, still shirtless, with kori balanced on his hip— in one hand he holds a small blue flame, which you’re sure he believes is safe enough for kori to play with while the other steadies your baby girl while she claps and squeals. a first. you’re not too sure when the last time you’d seen her happy was, but you figure her father’s presence had something to do with it.

“i was going to make you breakfast, but the little shit woke up and i didn’t have enough free hands to make you a grilled cheese.” touya smirks over at you, diminishing his flame to grasp kori’s hand and use it to wave at you. she squeals happily, curls bouncing and eyes lighting up in a similar way to her father’s. your heart melts at the sight of them being together, seeing the mannerisms that they share and how joyous they seem. they both grinned the same way, shared the little twitch in their noses and even their sneezes. kori todoroki was an exact replica of touya todoroki, right down to the tiny red curl she had lost in her white locks.

“you know, i thought you’d left,” you make your way across to the island where dabi sets his daughter down and check her temperature— just in case her sudden change in mood is down to any sickness. “the bed was cold when i woke up.”

“didn’t i make you a promise last night, sweetness? i’m not going anywhere,” the arsonist reminds you, wrapping his arms around you from behind while you wipe at kori’s pudgy baby cheeks and give her the once over again. “if you’re checking the kid’s temperature, she's usually pretty cold because of my mom’s quirk. something ice related will be coming through, but she must’ve inherited your strong constitution. guess she has a normal body temp when i’m around ‘cause it balances her out.” while dabi explains the inner workings of kori’s incoming quirk, she claps and babbles excitedly from her place on the island— making a game out of throwing her toys off of it. all of dabi’s logic makes sense and you seem a little more relieved knowing how to take care of her from here.

picking her up, along with her stray toys, you set your baby down by her playmat again and switch on some baby-safe cartoons while you fix yourself and dabi some coffee, kissing all over kori’s face beforehand. he had whined when you pulled away the first time to give your daughter some attention, it was almost comical how the big bad villain had pouted then. “i wonder if there’s anything of mine she inherited or if it’s all you and todoroki genetics.”

“well, her pretty smile certainly didn’t come from me, babydoll.” dabi muses with a light chuckle, arms trapping you against his chest once more as you continue to make you both some much needed caffeine. the coffee machine whirrs as you sway together in the early morning sunshine, warmth from the sun brushing against your skin and touya’s hair tickling your neck before he presses kisses over your fading love bites while kori’s annoying shows play in the background. everything feels complete and at peace. you feel like a real family. “i could get used to this, this life with you.”

you spin in dabi’s arms, cupping his cheeks and taking in his face for the millionth time in the last twelve hours. “then stay, or at least visit some more now that you’re back. you may not feel it, but kori and i need you. everything has always been better when you’ve been around touya… and i mean that. stay.” you stare at him with pleading eyes, standing on your tiptoes to stare him down and communicate just how much you needed him here with you both.

and for once in his life, touya todoroki feels the most loved he’s ever really felt. here in this shitty two bedroom apartment with his angelic little girl and his beautiful girlfriend during the winter season— touya knows this is right where he needs to be. “i’ll stay, for as long as you’ll fuckin’ have me.”

“forever, then?” you ask, eyes lowering to your boyfriend’s lips.

“forever it is, babydoll.” the villain nods, following your gaze before leaning down to capture your lips with a promise written into your sweet kiss.

extended ending

you thought that the best kind of weather was when the sun peeked out from behind the clouds but the air around you was still as cold as a december’s day. the breeze is enough to make your nose run just a little, but occasionally the warmth of the sun’s rays radiates across your skin like a warm blanket, balancing it out.

it was the kind of weather where people didn’t know how to dress, some wore mismatched shorts and jerseys whilst others were decked out in scarves up to their cheeks and sandals where their toes flopped out. it was the kind of weather that reminded you of dabi and kori, they were your warmth and your cold, they balanced each other out and made your family whole.

kori sits on your right hip as you push the car door closed and wave goodbye to an accomplice of your boyfriend’s— your driver for the evening. your little girl’s curls are combed back into two even pigtails, dark blue bows in each one while the red lock of her hair ( now, much longer ) curls against her forehead stubbornly. she looks so pretty, all fancied up a dress that dabi had chosen for her on this particular occasion, the lace irritated her only slightly but the decapitated endeavour plushie her father had gifted her served nicely as a distraction.

you bounce her once, cooing down at your baby before you look to the hospital in front of you— a look of determination in your eye. ever since the night touya had visited you and swore to stay, he’d kept his word to the best of his abilities. being a villain was still a major factor in your relationship, he came when he could stayed if his job permitted it— taking care of your daughter when your shifts were long and even going as far as to learn his and kori’s favourite recipes to cook on the nights where you couldn’t or you didn’t fancy take out.

in the last few weeks his visits had become slightly more scarce with shigaraki becoming more and more demanding, but touya’s plan to leave the league was slowly coming to fruition along with endeavour and the hero society which had both carved a life of struggle for the three of you.

your boyfriend being busy had given you more time to reconnect with the friends you had lost over the last year, meeting up with those from college, mina and tsuyu ( who’d simply thought you’d gone off the radar ) for kori’s first birthday. they absolutely loved her and your sweet girl loved all the attention she was getting. you even had the chance to reunite with your parents, who were more remorseful that you felt you couldn’t come to them for help than the fact that you’d gotten pregnant during college.

of course, they all asked who the father was and you simply told them that he had died ( which was half true ), using the excuse that you were embarrassed to be widowed and with a child at your young age.

shaking your head, you enter the hospital and recite the words that touya had made you practice the night before. you were here by endeavours orders and needed to see mrs.todoroki. your lover had used some sort of hack to put you on the list of visitors for his mother but one look at kori was all the guards and staff needed to let you through. a few nights prior to today, dabi had asked you to do one thing for him before it all went down, kissing your knuckles over some sushi take out.

so despite your nerves, you would go through with this for him, especially if it meant your family could be together. some guards escort yourself and kori to rei todoroki’s room, leaving you with a curt nod and slightly more polite wave to your daughter. the room itself is slightly bleak, a chair and some blue cushioned sofas positioned in an L-shape parallel to the blanketed bed. there’s a tv in the top left corner which and a set of draws underneath where a clear vase sits— containing blooming blue flowers.

rei looks up when you enter, grey eyes flashing with confusion despite the blank look on her face as kori babbles happily in your arms. “who are you?” she whispers, hands retreating from her flowers and  folding neatly in her lap.

“oh! i’m yn, your son’s fiancé and this,” you beam kindly, further entering the room and being sure to lock the doors behind you. you nod your head down to your daughter who waves around her endeavour plushy— paying no mind to the situation unfolding. “this is our daughter, your granddaughter...kori todoroki! she’s just turned one and daddy thought it was about time she met you, isn’t that right pretty girl?”

“dada!!!”

rei blinks and you smile again. “she’s a daddy’s girl,” you explain and lift your hand to snow the small sapphire engagement ring on your ring finger. touya had proposed last night as well, certain your plan would work out. “and quite frankly, so am i! how can i not be when your son treats me so well.”

nodding slowly, the wife of endeavour looks down at her hands which you note, nervously fiddle with a stray petal. “so, natsu and you—?” you can see her trying to work it out, curiosity written across her features. you could see why the woman might think kori was natuso’s child— they looked a lot like each other just by first glance but rei was missing an important feature. the colour of kori’s eyes.

“oh no, your other son. the eldest one.” you correct her with a sinister shake of your head. swiftly crossing the room to set your daughter down in rei’s lap. you watch with an evil air of satisfaction as rei todoroki freezes with fear, as the mistakes her family paid out to touya suddenly come to the forefront of her mind. she wobbles with kori still in her grip and you shoot her a dark glare— reaching over to fix her flowers in their vase. “touya picked these out, always said that you loved them. such a pretty shade of blue, no wonder why they’re your favourites, right?”

“please leave.” she looks up at you pleadingly, shaking like a leaf in the breeze outside. oh how you wish your fiancé was here to see this but he had more important things to do.

rolling your eyes, you grab the remote to switch on the tv— pinching kori’s nose affectionately to make her laugh again. “come sit with me rei, let’s watch some tv to help you calm down.”

the woman nods weakly, barely moving an inch as you take a seat beside her with a smile. you skip channels a few times, pride swelling up in your chest when you finally land on the right one, touya’s broadcast flashing across the screen. he sits leisurely in a chair, shirtless with all of his beautiful scars on display— a painful reminder of his childhood and what he’d become. “i, touya  todoroki, was born as the eldest son of endeavour. today i’ve killed over 30 innocent people until now, some to protect my family. my daughter, who i have not been able to see due to my father. i would like to let everyone know why i’d end up committing such a hideous act.” he speaks such calmness and clarity, and you can’t help but feel emotional at how he stands in front of the world.

kori grins, leaping up at the sight of her father on the screen and claps her hands. “dada!! dada!! lookie s’daddy!!” she squeals while rei struggles to breathe, panic set in her eyes.

you put a hand on the woman’s shoulder, offering her a sweet grin in an attempt to calm her before the oncoming storm. “keep watching, mrs.todoroki, touya said we’d be one big, happy family after this.” the words are sugar coated and sickly sweet, carrying the dark meaning across to your fiancé’s mother.

looking away, your heart swells while touya tears down the hero society and spills the truth for all of japan to see. you were grateful to the man he’d become— loyal to you, to your daughter and the dreams that you had. the satisfaction of seeing the real villains of the world fall was much greater than any hush money enji todoroki could ever offer.

fin.

— TAGLIST:

@husband-to-tomura-shigaraki @grace-todoroki @toshiuwu  @whet-ones-write​

[bluexiao]

Bestie imagining these men with their kids is a blessing I swear to god!!! I may hate kids but having kids with fictional men hits different. On that note I raise you this: Zhongli and Xiao believing that they won't be able to have children with their partner/wife because of their past deeds/karma but then oop surprise she gets pregnant and they almost faint. I see Zhongli having twin girls that are identical to each other and have his eyes and it makes him so happy bc he sees himself in his girls but also they're a carbon copy of their mother. Xiao also has a little girl who is an exact copy of him. Shy, reserved and only likes certain people. Her dad is always by her side and if he could he would never let her leave his arms. She has his pretty eyes and hair, the mother/reader had none of her genes transferred lol *this is all based on that one post you made about the boys and their kids so if you aren't into these types of asks anymore delete this and I won't send another one in for the rest of the husband squad lol*

Being a Parent — headcanons

Character/s: zhongli, xiao; implied f!reader

Word count: over 2k can you tell how dedicated i am to this post

Note/s: so a reminder that this is purely fiction and a headcanon. i named the kids and believe me i’m not well versed at chinese names so i’m sorry if i ever did something wrong with it or so. i’ll place the meanings below if you’re curious about them^^ also i’m so sorry this is REALLY long i did not expect that i’d write a lot until i’m halfway thru zhongli’s and realized i’m at 800 words. and wow…. you could tell who’s my favorite between the two if you read this whole. anyway thanks for those who requested! this is totally one of my personal favorites. enjoy!

also to the person who requested for venti, it’s coming soon! i literally forgot about scanning my requests so these two are the only ones i finished writing today don’t worry i’ll write for venti too!!

ZHONGLI

First things first, I can't believe we have the same image in mind! i also had imagined before that zhongli would have twin children or at least two and they will grow up with him whilst being half adeptus

Of course, he had thought of the consequences before; maybe an ancient god like him wouldn’t be able to reproduce, like the other adepti, maybe this is dangerous for you. However, after being proven that he can indeed produce a child, he couldn’t help but feel a swell of pride and joy in his chest.

I can see your family to be composed of twin girls and a younger son, a new addition to the family just a few months ago after your twins turned two. You and Zhongli did not expect him to come, but alas the gods had decided to bless you two with another one, and the both of you couldn’t be much happier.

I can see your family to be composed of twin girls and a younger son, a new addition to the family just a few months ago after your twins turned two. You and Zhongli did not expect him to come, but alas the gods had decided to bless you two with another one, and the both of you couldn’t be much happier.

The twin girls, Meiyin and Meilin, usually called Yin and Lin fort short, look a lot like you, but they have their father’s eyes and his personality. They may have body features of a dragon, however, you were quite surprised when you saw the tiny, golden horns that the twins have on their forehead. But then, it’s not like you two did not expect it. Zhongli is a dragon, of course his children may embody features that were like his.

They are the calmest babies you have ever seen and they grew up to still be as calm as they were when they were babies. They rarely had tantrums but if they would, your eardrums would hurt. It’s to the point that your husband will be the only one who would have the capability of calming them down.

“Must be an adepti trait?” you lightheartedly say, whilst still holding onto one of your ears, leaning by the door frame of the twins’ room, looking at Zhongli who held both of his daughters in his arms, one of them clinging onto his neck while the other leans on his chest.

You see him softly smile, and you thought it was because of your words, but it was because of you. You who still thought positively about the situation even if you probably knew that this kind of tantrum is not much of a positive trait that one should have—but they do because of their blood, blood that came from him and his past.

Yin and Lin can be quite different at times. Despite being twins, there are certain qualities in their personalities that differ. For example, Yin is really good with money, and she has her own savings at the age of, what, five? On the other hand, Lin is a huge spender, especially when she grew up. When Lin was a kid, she’d throw a tantrum if you won’t let her buy a toy or a dress she likes. Sometimes, Zhongli indulges her with her desires, but it would be Uncle Childe who buys a lot of “gifts” for her. Also, he’s the twins’ favorite uncle (poor Xiao).

As for your youngest son, Jianlei or Lei, he’s a total carbon copy of his father, from head to toe. If you’ve never seen him cry, this would be one of the rarest times you would. He felt happy when the girls came, but when he saw a little version of him, sleeping softly in your arms? That is a sight to behold and something he’d cherish until the end of his days.

Lei doesn’t have horns though. He’s the one who has the least noticeable features since he only has a set of fangs. They weren’t too big but they’re not that of a mortal one. However, Zhongli did mention that it might change when he grows up. You still haven’t asked him about it but you have an idea as to why he said that.

Your youngest son’s personality is kind of a mixture of you and Zhongli but his maturity sure came from his father. He doesn’t rush on things and solves problems in a tactical and orderly way. However, he can be pretty stubborn because he wants to go things his way—you’re actually debating in your mind if it came from your side or your husband’s.

Shockingly, it is Jianlei who likes Uncle Xiao the most. Even if the yaksha rarely visits, Lei remembers him very clearly and admires him a lot.

Only a trusted few knows about Zhongli’s identity and even so, the children were gems of the harbor. People believe their golden eyes are very intriguing and they are all beautiful. A photographer may even try to get your family as models or so and ever since, Lin would be interested in being photographed whereas Jianlei, your son, would grow up to be surrounded by girls who have a crush on him. Like his father however, he’s very dense. Yin on the other hand will be the one who’s interested in history that she may even ask if she can study at Sumeru someday when she grows up.

Zhongli is the type of father who is not too strict on his children but he would surely be protective of them behind the lines. If someone ever does wrong to any of his precious kids, there are heavy consequences for such actions—maybe except if they’re children or so. Either way, I see him as a family man and he’s a natural at it. Your children will always feel the genuine love and support from their father no matter which path they take. As for you, of course his attention may be divided but he’ll always look at you the same way he had always done so ever since. You are part of his family, and he’ll prove it to you every single day.

MeiLin can mean “beautiful forest” or “beautiful, fine jade/gem” or “plum jade”

MeiYin can mean “beautiful money/silver”

JianLei can mean “building/establishing a pile of stones” or “strong/healthy pile of stones”

XIAO

Ironically, I agree that Xiao will certainly have an only daughter. I mean you can have more but he really hates seeing you in pain during labor. He doesn’t like it when he couldn’t do anything but wait outside or sit by your side, urging you to hold his hand and squeeze it to somehow ease the pain—as if it would.

He’s extremely overprotective during your pregnancy, and yes that’s to a very high extent. He would be like that at the very start and also when you’re nearing your due for the sole reason that you eased him into thinking that he should calm down for a bit. He did, but when you get more vulnerable by the months pass, he’s back at it again, and you’re fine with that because it’s for the right reason anyway.

At first though, he was really hesitant and scared, you could see it in his eyes. The moment you revealed to him that you’re pregnant, no matter how hard he tried to mask his emotions, it’s still obvious.

“Y-you’re what?”

He stiffened in your hold and your eyes instantly saw the change in his own. If you didn’t know better, you would have seen this as a negative note, but you waited patiently in front of him, nodding your head and a reassuring smile forming on your lips.

You then caressed his hand slowly with your thumb and gently pulled it to your clothed stomach, letting his open palm rest on it while your comforting hand stayed on top of his.

“We, Xiao. We’re expecting.”

He visibly gulped as his gaze drifted down to where your hands were linked and you wouldn’t have to look closer to see that his eyes were tearing up. You could say that he was holding them back but a tiny, single tear made him lose. However you didn’t have time to raise your other hand to brush it away when he pulled you into a loose embrace—might be because he thinks if he held you tighter, something might happen.

You wouldn’t see, but you could tell that Xiao is now crying.

He wouldn’t say anything about his worries but you’d know it, especially if you had been with him for a long time.

When your daughter, whom you named Annchi, arrived, she peaked her eyes up to you and the moment you saw them, you saw her father. Xiao on the other hand noticed her great resemblance to you, from hair to nose to lips—except for the eyes. That one feature was what made him tear up again. Although he did not cry, it was obvious that he was close to anyway

He would be wary of holding her at first, but then Verr, the one who assisted you and the doctor during labor and the whole pregnancy, insisted him to since you had fallen asleep at that time. When he held your baby the first time, Verr guided him at first, but he got the hang of it in a minute or two. He’s uncomfortable at first but when his baby looked up at him again and reached out her small hands to play with the tips of his hair, he melted. It felt as if his world lightened up more once his daughter arrived.

He has a soft side on his daughter and you would always catch him looking at her with a gentle look on his eyes, sometimes even paired with a small smile.

There are times when you have to reassure him still, especially if he’s still suffering from his karmic debt. He wouldn’t let himself hold his daughter and even so far as be close with her. It will hurt looking and seeing him like this, but he’s doing it to protect her. Although it’s not like your daughter was very fragile like a normal mortal would—she has an adeptus’ blood, his own blood.

Deep inside him though, he hopes that his suffering did not pass onto his daughter. He’d worry about it sometimes but when he sees her smiling up at him, those thoughts would instantly vanish.

Like the previous children, Annchi also has a feature that came from her father’s blood and it's the wings on her back. It was quite small of course but as she grew up, it became more noticeable. Of course there were people who questioned it, and it was one of the reasons why your husband were more alert, especially when she started going to school. Too many people are quite interested in knowing your daughter that you two eventually decided to have her home-schooled instead—of course with the permission of your daughter. Surprisingly but kind of expected, she accepted. As long as she thinks it’s reasonable, she doesn’t mind going along with it.

She also has a tattoo on her neck. It was not quite obvious when she was a baby since it only became more visible during her toddler years and by the time she was a teenager, the tattoo was clearly of an image of a bird.

Your daughter is reserved, just like her father, but she can be a mixture of you and him at times. Although, it’s quite obvious that she and her father have more understanding towards each other. Even if her father wasn’t saying anything, she clearly knows what he thinks.

She will be closer to you in an emotional aspect though. She respects her father that she understands that he is not like an ordinary mortal who can understand emotions, that’s why it’s probably best to talk to you about those.

Lastly, since this is getting longer than it should be Xiao is the type of father who would stand at the sidelines and watch his child grow. He’d support her, sure, but he would like to see them independent and not blinded by the dark side of the world. He will keep his karmic debt from her and she won’t even know about it but she might see it a couple of times but she won’t question it. It’s unknown whether he has knowledge about these times but going back to the point, he wants to protect her and he would from other people, but he would show her that the world is harsh and cruel, despite its beauty. He wants her to learn to fight and protect herself because there might be a time when he wouldn’t be there to do so. Thus, it is only best that he shall pass on his strength, so that she may live longer and have a happier life than his.

Annchi means “amazing, peace, angel” or “angelic peace”

Trivia: I kind of based my own family on Xiao's part. I’m an only child and my family works exactly that way. Me and my dad are introverts and we understand each other in a different way than me and my mom would. Only at that aspect though lmao.

[the-al-chemist]

It’s been a long time since the last FFWF ask, bestie 💛

My question for today is:

I call you the faceclaim goddess for a reason because no one has an eye for believable family resemblance than you. I’d like to know your process behind choosing faceclaims, especially when it comes to family relations? Maybe even illustrated on the most superior of all families aka the Hexleys? 🥰

Thank you for this compliment and this ask! 🧡

So, I almost always come up with a character and an idea for a story before choosing that character’s faceclaim. I generally don’t pick their faceclaim off an image alone, either - I can only really get a grasp on whether they “fit” the idea I have in my head if I see them move/speak. I don’t just pick faces, I pick mannerisms and gestures and facial expressions that suit the character. Sometimes this is by searching, but usually I have an idea of someone I’ve seen in a programme or show that might work.

As for picking faceclaims for related characters, I’ve always had the sort of brain that picks up on similarities between faces (the number of times I’ve thought that an actor was someone else entirely because I’ve seen a resemblance and thought that they had the same face), so making a family tree isn’t too hard. Basically, I use a lot of google image searches where I search two names at once so I get several examples of both faces appearing next to each other so I can compare them.

You want illustrations? I’ll give you illustrations, and then some. It’s all under the cut BC it’s so long.

Artemis Hexley - Dafne Keen/Mila Kunis: I never had to seek out a faceclaim for little Artemis; I started rewatching His Dark Materials whilst writing one of the earlier parts of the Saga and realised that Dafne Keen was the child I was imagining whilst writing. It’s not really surprising, given how much HDM has influenced me as a writer and as a person, and how much Lyra was an inspiration for Artemis as a character.

I did and didn’t have to actively seek out a faceclaim for Artemis as an adult. Mila Kunis was the first face that popped into my head, because I had seen photos of Dafne Keen in which I thought she looked very like her, however, I didn’t really like the idea of her for Artemis as I thought her too conventionally beautiful. However, I struggled to find anyone else who fitted what I imagined or believably based on the face I already had in mind, and after seeing her in this video, I was sold. She’s perhaps a prettier, more polished version of Artemis than I’d envisioned, but she just is Artemis nevertheless.

Jacob Hexley - Dominic Cooper: Jacob was always Dominic Cooper. He’s got the similar look around the eyes to Artemis and his character in The History Boys is exactly how I imagined Jacob as a teenager - cocky, charming, calculating.

Sara Kowalski-Hexley - Rachel Weisz: Sara is the daughter of Queenie Goldstein, so to find her faceclaim, I google searched “actress who looks like Alison Sudol”. Rachel Weisz was the first hit. I did consider options for Sara who might be more like Artemis in appearance, but I love that if you were to look at pictures of Queenie, Sara and Artemis in succession, you’d get the believable family connection.

Leander Hexley - Andrew Scott: there are two reasons why I picked Andrew Scott for a faceclaim for Leander. Firstly, I just love him. He’s one of my favourite actors. Secondly, he’s a very versatile actor, who has a lot of different famous roles. We don’t know much about Leander other than he was clever, butted heads with Jacob at times, and died in tragic and suspicious circumstances. Was he a sweet and funny man like the hot priest? Was he a total psychopath like Moriarty? Was he a clever and brave but absent father like John Parry? He could be any one of those things, and you wouldn’t guess at a single one based on his face alone.

Héloïse Perrault - Audrey Tautou: Audrey Tautou was one of the faces I considered briefly for Sara. I disregarded her because Sara is American with Jewish/Polish ancestry and Audrey Tautou is just… SO FRENCH. Still, it was an important part of my lore and backstory for Artemis that she had french ancestry, so Héloïse’s face claim was the first I picked for my HPHL characters.

Ethel Hexley - Maya Hawke: Ethel’s character concept came first, as soon as I wanted a face for her, my mind went straight to a BBC adaptation of Little Women I watched at Christmas a few years ago. Maya Hawke played Jo March in this (and she did an amazing job), and she was just the first idea I had for Ethel, who is very Jo-like in personality.

Jim Hexley - Josh O’Connor: I loved Josh O’Connor in the Durrells and The Crown. Neither of these characters are at all like Jim, however, once Ethel’s face was set, his came to mind as her twin. They have the same freckled complexion, prominent ears, and something similar in the bone structure. He also has a very approachable and slightly awkward look to him, which I liked for Jim.

Ophelia Burke - Mia Wasikowska: Ophelia is the exception to my rule; she is the first (and one of just two) of my characters where the face came first. And this is your fault, as you know.

Mavis Morland/Marguerite Nott - Carey Mulligan: I once met Carey Mulligan in Wagamamas. Also, she was one of the faceclaims I considered for adult Artemis. The fact that she has a passable resemblance to Mia Wasikowska sealed Ophelia’s fate and the faceclaim lineage of this branch of the family tree.

Malvolio Nott - Will Keen: I struggled for ages to find a faceclaim for Ophelia’s horrible husband. Then I realised the solution was simple - who better to have a family resemblance to Artemis than her faceclaim’s actual dad?! He seems lovely in real life, but plays a lot of evil men in suits, which works perfectly for Malvolio.

Zadie Taylor-Allen - Antonia Gentry: it’s easy to forget with the several generations between them and the different surname, but Zadie is actually a Hexley - her father is the descendant of Ethel and @slytherindisaster’s Lysander. Which means that in @kc-and-co’s canon, she is also very distantly related to Murphy McNully. I didn’t pick this faceclaim because of a family resemblance, I picked Antonia Gentry because when I created a ballerina OC, I knew I wanted her to be a P.O.C., as women of colour are underrepresented in ballet. Antonia Gentry has a really beautiful and soulful face, and she’s got Ethel’s freckles.

Cleo Hexley - Simone Ashley: the latest of the Hexley brood is my second OC for whom the face came first. More than anything, it was Simone Ashley’s mannerisms and facial expressions that made the connection between her and the Hexley family dynasty. She’s Jacob’s daughter, but she is under development at the moment, because I am still considering Jacob’s story, and because I always feel the need to research my OC’s who are members of a minority group more stringently so as to represent those groups accurately and respectfully.