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pinksweatergettingbetter · 7 years ago

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warning, the following has mainly snarky (and possibly furious) opinions on Spirit of Justice. Reader discretion is advised.

Okay folks. this is it. part 1 of the final chapter

here we go.

trial day 2?? oh yeah i forgot they split this game up in the worst, uneven way possible

wow that cutscene was

something alright

wow datz actually managed to hold onto the snow globe. kudos?

what the fuck

i think i heard it wrong but Dhurke’s objection sounds like an old man

I'm pretty sure i heard it wrong

missed the bass

who was that no– oh Garananana

i guess she's gonna be the final boss instead huh

im so tired i cant even snark properly

“is that kosher?”

i like it

oh god

what.... what is she wearing

i mean

fuckin

TALK about madonna-whore complex. oh yeah, time to turn super evil?? bear your midriff! show off dem tiddies!

look, SOJ. theres only one bad bitch in ace attorney who can pull off floaty tendril hair, and its NOT ga’ran.

i cant believe i have to look at this train wreck for the rest of the trial

“heh heh heh. its all coming back now. the feel of my blood pumping through my veins”

this is perhaps because youre actually moving now, your eminence.

can we just dispense with the trial and have a good old fashioned anime fight? cmon apollo, spike up that hair and grab your BFS.

“meep”

WHATS WITH THE MEEPING

BONNY DID THAT TOO

SOJ ITS 2016 ...ACTUALLY ITS 2028 YOU HOLES

everyone in the court: :O what??? whats wrong with rayfa??? why is she sad???

oh i dunno maybe because her fucking Father just got brutally murdered?? maybe??

what the fuck is up with SOJ characters being dumb as a bag of bricks when it comes to other peoples’ feelings regarding death of loved ones???

phoenix: shits fucked, thats why?? apollo: OHHHHHHHHHHHHH

“seems like she's worse off today than she was yesterday”

hey game you'd better not be implying any shit

“discipline”

soj

alright, back after another longass break. i can do this.

( That’s oddly compassionate of him, all things considered )

I was about to defend Nahyuta because what kind of person wouldn’t try to spare a child from witnessing that kind of trauma... but then again, this is the Sadmad who purposefully tried to trigger someone into losing a trial so

(shrug emoji)

grana’s gone into full HORHORHOR BITCH MODE

partially I'm totally numb because i dont have any stakes in her newfound ebilness, and partially I'm tired of this weird new trend of child abuse in the new games

“Barbed head.”

oh my god

the first person she goes to after realizing that her caretaker is gone is fucking Phoenix

im gonna cry

“ive been reduced to “royal robe remover”” NO NICK YOU’VE BEEN UPGRADED TO DAD BY SOMEONE WHO’S NOT YOU

( ‘It’s like she’s grooming Mr. Wright to be Nayna’s replacement’)

I know this game is all about confusing bullshit for heartwarming moments and vice versa but guys

good lord

my heart

i really needed that

(sigh) they really couldn’t get someone who sounded like a fucking 14 year old to do her voice?? really???

rayfa: (looks like she's going to die and collapses)

apollo: this is not good...

gee apollo you really think so?

wait a fuking second

we went through the whole dance cutscene and we’re not even going to see the pool??? does that mean the priestess has to be conscious and present for the images to be visible? ...and how does that work, anyway?

i just realized, a medium could use a pool to see the dead, but how the hell could they project it for others to see?? does she literally open a portal to hell???

(sigh) i just regret sitting through that cutscene again

“cabal of traitorous lawyers”

i love that

(Seriously Dhurke? This is no laughing matter.)

this basically sums up Dhurke’s entire personality

...yknow, i know what they were trying to do with his character– i really do. i know he’s supposed to come off as a dashing, cavalier rebel who laughs in the face of danger.

but they overshot endearingly irreverent and ploughed straight into fuckwaddome. if you want a character to be charming, they need softer moments too. Dhurke isn’t a bad person, but he’s kind of an asshole when you get right down to it, and nothing so far is proving otherwise.

ok ive heard Dhurke’s Objection again and it doesn't sound like an old man– it just sounds about as overblown and ridiculous as Manfred von Karma’s (not to mention about as deep)

LET DHURKE SAY BITCH

... i guess

another perfect example of Dhurke being kind of a fuckwad: he keeps needling the queen and baiting her in ways that could get himself killed, which would be all fine and dandy if he were the brave resistance leader being tortured for information in the bowels of a dungeon.

...but here’s the thing.

IF YOU DIE, DHURKE, APOLLO AND PHOENIX DIE TOO. DID YOU FORGET ABOUT THE GODDAMN DC ACT? ITS NOT JUST YOUR DEAD ASS ON THE LINE HERE SO SHUT YOUR SASSY TRAP AND THINK ABOUT SOMETHING OTHER THAN YOUR *AMAZING WIT* FOR ONCE.

you’ve got 2 extra lives on the line here.

...3 if my suspicions are correct.

stop calling him son please you abandoned him in an orphanage and didnt contact him for 14 years.

...and if he can’t call you ‘dad’ you have no right to call him ‘son’

coming back to this after ghost trick has convinced me that one of ga’ran’s lackeys miiiiiight be related to Cabanela, baby

“Wright... I can see we are kindred spirits, you and I! Hah-ha ha ha ha ha!!”

FUCK YOU DHURKE

“It’s pretty easy to spot the difference between a soulless man and the soulless shell of a man”

ok that did get a laugh out of me, good job dhurke.

apollo: pls dont get us killed dhurke: mmmm ok ill try but I'm not promising anything lol

://///

“But remember, son, if you truly believe in me, you should be able to prove my innocence.”

do i even have to list how many reasons thats wrong and a shitty thing to say

“Such Insolence”

You’ve been beat out, Not So Fast

Ga’ran used Gust!

Apollo flinched and couldn’t move!

“I could behead you at any time”

she's got a point; she’s a fucking despot, there’s no reason to actually hold a trial. i mean i guess she wants to shut up the rebels but just killing them would be a lot easier and its not like she has any qualms about murder

“Aw shoot, ya got me.”

again, not an appropriate reaction for whats going on buddy

lol get fucked kjudge

DGFUFUS OH COOL

WE GOT GUILTY (excited cheers from the audience)

the applause and the shots of everyone with :O faces is making me feel like i just won a gameshow

wheres my cheesy jingle

also i love how Dhurke’s like “oh shit!! my assholishness has directly resulted in my son’s death!!! did NOT see that coming!!!!!!!!!”

again the sound mixing is drowning out the background music (sigh)

“your benevolence? I’d be happy to lend an ear if you’d like to talk!”

>this is it, this is why he leaves the series guys. Apollo is too good for these sinful games.

DAMNIT DHURKE, YOUR SHIT MOUTH IS RUBBING OFF ON YOUR SON

hmm

we’ve got an april may here

“Rayfa, I shall buy you a new servant”

so Kooraheen practices slavery..? I mean, she.... she said ‘buy’, not hire.

“she would have left shoeprints”

do you know what evaporation is your malevolence

wait wait wait

that doesn't make any sense

the only prints leading out are from Inga, but the prints inside the building are from Nayna? how did she avoid leaving prints leading inside, then?? did she just long-jump over the dirt path???

the guards are not fanboying, apollo, they’re toadying. there’s a difference.

apollo: maybe the place he was stabbed and the place he died were different

(the game only continues after you carefully explain what dying of blood loss is three years later)

to be completely fair, there are actually stories of people who were unaware of being stabbed

furthermore, when you get stabbed, you’re not going to be the most rational human being on earth.

phoenix, don’t give sadmad that point, especially when he’s currently assaulting your protege

now, as i was saying, Apollo’s suggestion that Inga was stabbed in the back and then ran into the temple is perfectly plausible; running to shelter from an attacker is probably the first thing you’d want to do when injured, and the tomb was a pretty safe place, i’d wager.

tbh i really don’t know why they’re arguing about him feeling the pain as that wouldn’t really impair his movement considering he was stabbed in a place that wouldn’t affect his ability to walk???

but yeah apparently he was doped up to shit so

...i highly doubt back pain medication is strong enough to negate a stab wound. on the other hand, if it is and your back pain is THAT intense, Inga, you need to see a fucking doctor pronto.

...yeah shots straight into the spine is one step away from surgery; not to be an asshole but I'm not sure Inga was doing so well anyway before he went

huh. are they really gonna give us an actual choosable choice to abandon Dhurke and save our own skin? Cause that would be interesting; a lot like the old games where you could “”choose”” to defend a client or not.

to be clear here, though, i wouldn't choose “no” even as much as i dislike dhurke. we know (sigh) that he’s innocent, and even if i dont like him it’s our duty to defend his shitty ass

OH HOLY FUCK

THERES THE CHOICE

wow. y’know SOJ, i dont much like you, but you fuckin Did That. well done.

also thank you for the Justice pun it is much appreciated.

“And while I can’t say I’m used to it, this isn’t exactly my first rodeo”

FWHAT

>game flashes back to the Ahlbi case

DSKJFLS THIS IS LITERALLY THE “at second rodeo: this isn't my first rodeo” POST

YES OK WE’VE SEEN THIS CUTSCENE TWICE NOW ALREADY

WE GET IT, RAYFAS GOT COLD FEET ABOUT BEING QUEEN

MAYAS IN THE GAME

phoenix: allow me to mansplain how rayfa is feeling despite how fucking obvious it is. after all, we know our players have the mental and emotional capacity of goldfish!

oh hey mansplain is a legit word in the dictionary

cool!

why are they building this up?? just fucking tell Rayfa to do her stupid dance again and get on with it; we already did this at the beginning of the trial

“Hmm... Indeed. It would be problematic.”

ohohoooohohohhhihgjhgo

oh her nails are actually tiny pen

thats neat

thank goodness Kooraheeneese is an up-and-down written language– otherwise they’d have to make a whole new animation for the english game teehee

“....................But... Horn Head needs my help”

oh my heart

dan she just straight up begone’d her

see the one thing that falls flat here is that, during a regular trial, the prosecution saying “oh, ok, have it your way; you can try to prove your theory” holds up a little more since they... you know. don’t have absolute power.

where as, with Garananana, its more like she's just a huge posturing pushover. especially since every other minute she's saying “ok, I'm gonna kill you for REAL now.”

rayfa: b but if i fail you'll be killed!!! i dont get it...

apollo: i literally just finished explaining that I'm 100% ready to die for my shitty job that was like 5 minutes ago

it is sweet to see that he’s cheering her on though. good big bro

I'm finding small solace in this beautiful moment of “your foreign dad and bro are here for you babe reach for the stars”

Athena’s probably flashing a double thumbs up from the gallery too

“But... I finally know now. I know in what I can trust”

Bobby, from the afterlife: YOU’RE DOING AMAZING SWEETIE

Garan: What??? my tiny 14 year old daughter is going to do a thing i don’t want her to??? fuck there’s no way i can shut her up. not even with all of my large adult man guards who could easily just escort her out of the courtroom without any resistance because they’re my fucking royal guards and I'm the Queen

oh shit she took off her own cape

im so glad i muted the game so her awful voice actress couldn’t ruin this cool moment

and now as this long ass cutscene plays out again, i simply cannot help but wonder about the poor choir and how long they’ve been on standby

where do they keep the choir during trials

whats it like singing the dance of devotion song every trial

oh finally here we go. alright, lets see what the magic party pool has in store for us this time

...o ...ok then

OH! OH SHIT

Inga’s face blind?!

Y’know I did have a few thoughts about that when we discovered his notebook but I didn’t think they’d actually go that route... though, thinking about it now, it is pretty convenient.

...ok everyone’s freaking out. maybe they’ve never heard of face-blindness? ...or maybe its not face blindness after all

im pretty sure it is though

i dont know why but everyone being like FUCK ITS GOD and phoenix being like “whoops shits trippy now” made me laugh pretty hard

ok i gotta say I'm actually a little invested now, even if its just because i think face-blindness is an interesting thing to incorporate into a murder case. again, a convenient thing, but an interesting thing all the same.

ahh fuck i keep forgetting how the stupid seance works

welp, there goes one of my souls... (sigh)

..apollo you dont need to show her the picture of her dead father to say “he had a cell phone”.

the voice was coming from INSIDE THE PHONE

RAYFA HAS A PET FROG????

WHAT

SHOW US THE FROG SOJ

SHOW US THE FROG! SHOW US THE FROG! SHOW US THE FROG!

...why would Rayfa interpret the sound of the warbaa’d (something she’s familiar with) with a lion’s roar (something she’s unfamiliar with) ??

oh i see thats why Vore Machine is an idiot

for plot convenience

Datz Are’bal, a man who throws fire crackers at children.

...sounds like an are’bal guy.

bahdum-tshh

“The joker who got a kick out of startling Ahlbi with his Dragon Snot Snaps”

...something tells me that if Datz found out about Youtube, he’d be one of those “””prank””” channels.

also WHY ARE THEY CALLED SNOT SNAPS

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN

“happy-go-lucky”

i think you mean vaguely sociopathic

(sigh) ive finally been worn down to the point where i need a walkthrough. ive... been beaten...

boy ahlbi’s just a font of knowledge isn't he

DID SHE JUST BREAK HER NAILS OFF

PLEASE SAY THOSE WERE STICK ONS

HOL SHIT

MMMM LAY IT ON ME NICK

face blindness

... i mean theyre not calling it that but thats what it is

yeah yeah channeling blah blah come on! youre in the LAND of channeling !

shduhjahdjk

I'm picturing Inga running into his own dead body and flipping his shit

oh man. thats the end of Trail 2 part 1.

guess i’ll see you guys on the other side... heheh.

#soj spoilers #sulking over SOJ #ooc #its a LONG one]

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babyprime · 7 years ago

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Fallout !!!! For the ask meme

*longest ye boi ever*

Favorite character: im gonna have to go for ONE per game that ive played cause otherwise id just die probably? butch deloria, john hancock, and ten of spades. My Fuckening Boys.

Least Favorite character: i just do not goddamn care for that vulpes guy. i just dont fucking like him! everyone apparently thinks hes SO HOT but he annoys the shit out of me for some reason. ivehadenoughofthisdude.jpg i also feel this way abt maxson but i think they have something in common! ppl wanna fuck both of em for some reason so im constantly hearing about em to the point where its like Shut The Up

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): ive got like so many? butch/m!lone wanderer, nick/hancock, preston/hancock (which im convinced im the ONLY person on this earth to ship), m!courier/arcade, m!courier/ten of spades

Character I find most attractive: Daddy Valentine. and marcus. and preston. and hancock.

Character I would marry: preston garvey is the most marriage material in this franchise or any other

Character I would be best friends with: anyone who would let me make AWFUL kink jokes as my friends do and i feel in my heart that person would be deacon

A random thought: the first time i saw a feral ghoul in fo4 i literally got so scared i cried. like the graphics were TOO good and i wasnt expecting them to just GET UP like that even tho i knew they go dormant but it just startled me into tears. honestly my first feral encounter in any playthrough makes me jump but i just Did Not Like That

An unpopular opinion: i think its super unfair that the lone wanderer gets shit on if they dont willingly fucking die because theyre literally like 19 when a bunch of grown ass adults expect them to walk into a chamber of radiation for The Good Of The Capital or whatever. idk im not saying its not brave or noble or anything for them to do it but i didnt think it was fair for the ending narration to drag the hell out of them for getting scared and not being able to go through with it. i mean in general i dont think pretty much anything that happened regarding the lone wanderer was fair because their DAD started all that shit and they didnt ask to be born. they were raised in a fucking vault, they dont know shit about the wasteland and theyre like 21 at MOST at the end according to the canon timeline and everyones like “do this dangerous thing for us you actual goddamn teenager! we’re like 40 and lived here our whole lives but you can do it right!” and im sitting here like wtf i just left high school and if thats not a metaphor for real life idk what is

My canon OTP: technically me and preston garvey lmao

Non-canon OTP: please let m!lone wanderer and butch kiss im actually,,,, begging,,,,,,,, but also nick/hancock

Most badass character: well for 4 the obvious answer is hancock but as a companion i have to say preston fucking garvey and his god gun because regardless of what canon would imply as a COMPANION prestons never gotten hurt and sometimes ends up finishing fights before i even get there and hancock is a feeble old man with glass bones that needs 3 stimpacks an hour. in new vegas its like. boone TECHNICALLY but surprisingly arcade gannon is like lo key a goddamn beast bc u expect that shit from craig Eats Nails And Never Sleeps Or Smiles sniper copypasta come to life boone but when dr nerd takes out 3 raiders on his own before u even see them its like oh goddamn. but also grandpa bacon terrifies the absolute shit out of me. im not gonna fight him. he got set on fire thrown off a cliff and hes like 70 and i KNOW he could still destroy my whole ass if i got him mad so im not gonna try. idk what that man is made of but im p sure its 50% rage 50% jesus and i just dont want any part of it thanks

Pairing I am not a fan of: i dont like!! any pairing involving the legion! or maxson! im just tired of seeing them and i want them blacklisted from my life! but i also dont like m/f just in general as a personal pref, but esp with like…. legion/f!courier and shit. its got uncomfortable undertones. i dont like m/f!wanderer or m/f!courier or even m/f!sole when its an unnamed player character/intended self insert bc it makes me Dysphoric and feel skeeved out. but ill make an exception for garvey/f!sole if its my sole oc mags

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): theres so many characters that should have gotten more development but im p annoyed at how they like. HINT at pres stuff and then because of todd howard they dont go anywhere with it. im not exactly happy with in general how you dont rly get to talk to your companions that much. and then aside from that these games in general are notorious for giving u REALLY GOOD npcs that u can have 1 conversation with and then its like “ok now fuck off”. like ten of spades, bitter root, and jimmy in westside? like give them!! a sidequest or smthn!!! you cant just make me love a char and tell me to piss off!!!

Favourite friendship: betsy + ten and m!courier + veronica are wlw/mlm solidarity

#long post /#a very long post im sorry i love these games #ghastholes

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fourteendaysinaweek · 4 years ago

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So many things are pissing me off about Grimm (and a lot of those type of shows)

Dont get me wrong, Grimm is one of my absolute favorite shows ever and I wish it had a bigger fandom, but...

The show sets up for these GREAT characters and give them circumstances that it would make sense if those characters became recurring or at least make appearances is other episodes.

Like:

Holly Clark. You're telling me a teenage girl who was alone in the woods for nine years came out of it with OUT a major connection to the people who found her? Or the only other blutbad she knows??? The only person who could explain what was going on???? She just went to her Kehrseite adopted mother and integrated well into society?

Carly and Jarold Kampfer. You're telling me that Hank's goddaughter and best friend are NEVER even MENTIONED again???

Ariel Eberhart. That girl had the MOST potential to become a stalker, I mean faking her fiery death and walking out like a Boss Ass Bitch™ and you're telling me she just counted her losses after Nick KILLED HER FATHER and left? Unrealistic. Out of character. -12000/10

Gracie and Hanson. These homeless kids that Nick and Juliette very clearly bonded with, just fucking disappear? Never to be mentioned again? As if Nick would not take them out for dinner at least once a week and check up on them at all?

Zuri and Jared Ellis. Hank's physical therapist he tried to pursue and her brother. You're telling me they don't go for coffee once a month and that Hank doesn't call Jared to talk about video games? (Uh edit: uhhh nevermind kinda wish she didn't come backkkkkk)

Alicia, Juliette's college roommate who turned out to be a fuchsbau just dropped off the face of the earth and didn't try to get together with her friend and savior? You're telling me Nick didn't even call her when Juliette died???? Bro.

Max, Genvieve, Ivan, and Damien. Monroe and Rosales never called to check up on them? Didn't keep in touch with them after they left to get Max the help he needed after suffering from the umkippen?

Robin Steinkellner. She never said shit after Nick saved her life and got her abusive ex boyfriend and his brother arrested?

Sam and Dana Tomas. Wu was shown to be incredibly protective of Dana as they were childhood friends, but after the Aswang episode they're never mentioned again?

Angelo, Wu's cousin. Yet again, you're telling me Wu lives close enough to his cousin to visit once but never again? Bullshit.

Bélem Hoyos, the coyotl girl who turned into El Chupacabra, who's husband/boyfriend gave his life to save?

JOSH PORTER y'all this man went on a ROAD TRIP with TRUBEL to go back to his house after houndjagers chased him and his dying father across the country to get to Nick before his father died. This man found out that the stuff his father tried to tell him about, the stuff he thought his father was CRAZY for thinking existed... He found out that it's real. Like you mean to tell me this guy got home safely and had no more problems? No more houndjagers? Man didn't have nightmares upon nightmares? I think Trubel didn't even make it back to his house but he just went on living? Didn't look for her, didn't try to call Nick and tell him what happened?

Elly and the Naiads I mean Nick literally saved her life and you're telling me he doesn't pop in randomly to see how they're doing? He hasn't picked up some sign language from/for her?

Roddy Geiger??? Monroe had a come to metaphorical Jesus with him about talent and you're telling me they never get together and play?

Clay Pittman???? Like him and Trubel obviously made some sort of connection at the boxing ring, she was the first person who told him he didn't have to fight, and you're telling me they never run into each other and talk??

I forget his name but the little kid from the gollum episode who CLEARLY had an attachment to Trubel and Nick never got called in the middle of the night with "hey my son is having a hard time, can you give us Theresa's number??" Like???

Like the writers canonically made him a good father/brother figure to Trubel and a good father to Kelly where is our other evidence where is Nick adopting all of the kids he sees while working I mean he's a detective he sees lots of kids and teenagers ain't no way in hell that man doesn't play at least a small part in their lives after the job is done.

Trubel is clearly good with children and it's just never mentioned aside from when it's plot-relevant.

Feel free to add on with anyone I've forgotten. This is list is incomplete as I have yet to finish the series but still.

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