#nerd ass nerd looking bug

[gotta-draw-em-all-daily]

Day eight hundred twenty four 824 Blipbug

[weirdbabs]

what kind of conspiracy theories do you think stephen would've spun if he was suspended from school and during the day he missed johnny's personality did a complete 180 bc of ed, who johnny identified to ollie and rj as one of the kids floating with max

[wynnyfryd]

Trailer Park Steve AU part 3

part 1 | part 2

(tw: guns, accidental death)

Robin’s already in full panic mode by the time Steve pulls up to her place, flinging the passenger door open and throwing herself into the car with so much force that the car bounces on its wheels a little. “Drive!!”

“Jesus Christ, good morning to you, too.”

“Steve!”

Steve starts to drive.

Beside him, Robin flips the visor down to look at her reflection; groans and scrubs her hands down her face in misery at whatever she sees. Steve doesn’t really get it. He thinks she looks beautiful, with her hair gently moving in the breeze from the open window, with her freckles lit up by the early morning sun.

“Ugh,” she says, turning to look at him, “I can’t believe I look like a zombie and you’re gonna make me late to the first day of school.”

“Wow.” Fuckin’ ingrate. And when he was just being so nice to her in his head. “How about a thank you, huh? ‘Thanks for picking me up, Steve. Thanks for bringing my backpack, Steve. Sorry you almost got shanked by your neighbor, Steve.’”

“You what???”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Um, yes it very much does matter, what the—”

“—I’m just saying, a little gratitude? Wouldn’t hurt you.”

He licks at the corner of his mouth, spritzes wiper fluid to clear the bugs off the windshield. Robin’s eyes are bulging out of her head, but he really doesn’t want to talk about how he still feels the ghost press of steel against his throat, so: “You’re not even right, by the way; I don’t know why you’re complaining.”

“Huh?”

“School started yesterday. I’m making you late for the second day of school.”

“Yesss,” she draws the word out like he’s stupid, rolling her wrist in a hurry up and get it motion, “but everyone knows that syllabus day doesn’t count. The first pep rally is the real first day of school.”

Ah, there it is.

Steve steals another peek at his best friend while they’re on a straightaway, notes the nervous twitch of her hands as she goes back to fussing at her reflection; the way she’s clumping her lashes together with seven coats too many of some drugstore brand mascara. She’s wearing lipstick. “This is about Vick—”

“—Don’t talk about—”

“—It’s about Vickie, isn’t it?”

“Ughhhhh.” Robin folds forward and thunks her head against the dash. “Fine, okay? Fine! Yes! This may have something to do with a distressingly cute fellow marching band member. Are you happy now?”

“Ecstatic.”

“Oooh, big word for you, Steven.” She swats him on the shoulder, face all twisted up in offense. “Stop laughing!”

“Stop hitting me,” he laughs. “I’ll dump your ass out on this highway.”

She gasps and narrows her eyes at him. “You wouldn’t.”

Steve eases his foot onto the brake.

“Okay, okay! Mercy! I’m being an asshole, alright? I’m sorry. I’m just— I’m stressed! Being gay is very stressful.”

The knife incident pops back into his mind. “Yeah,” he mutters, “I imagine it is.”

—

He catches himself slouching down into his seat a bit when they pull up to the school. Has to force himself to sit upright, hears his mother’s tutting in his ear about bad posture and the message it projects to the world.

It’s not that he’s embarrassed to be here; really, he isn’t. He’s just hoping to avoid being spotted by the nuggets now that they go here, too, lest he be accosted for evading his chauffeur duties.

God.

Dustin’s nerd shit is infecting his brain.

Robin grabs her bag out of the back seat, plants a parting peck on Steve’s cheek as she gets out of the car. “See you later?”

“Yeah, I’ll pick you up for work.”

“Love you, dingus.”

And then he’s alone again.

With Robin gone, Steve finds himself driving. Wandering and aimless, like a ghost who doesn’t know he’s gone. It’s not like he has nothing to do — he’s supposed to be out finding a second job, finding a way to support himself and his mom, because he’s the man of the house now. Because his life has turned into one of those shitty, overcomplicated word problems from math class.

If a recently widowed mother works no hours and her minimum-wage son works as many as Family Video will allow, how much mold-riddled dogshit housing can they afford?

Not much.

Inevitably, he finds himself circling the scorched bones of Starcourt, driving tired loops around the barbed wire perimeter. His ghost likes to guide him here; can’t shake the place where he shook off the mortal coil.

He didn’t know it at the time, but Steve Harrington died the day the mall burned down. Embarrassing, to not hear the death knell as his family name went up in smoke.

It was hard to hear much at all that night, between the concussion and the fireworks and the shrieking of a monster being torn apart, but the memory caresses his mind now in cruel whispers: the headrush of victory; the blood and the sweat; the relief that they’d won, they’d done it, it’s over, they won.

Steve tugs at his bad ear ‘til the ringing subsides.

Some fucking grand prize.

The thing is, you can’t go around exploding an eldritch horror without alerting the US government, and the US government can’t go around letting major investors in a hostile commie invasion keep their assets once they find out about their treasonous schemes. It happened fast: the arrest, the bail, the impending trial and the seizure of property. Richard Harrington was once a small town god on an invisible throne, making deals with devils in shadowy boardrooms, and suddenly he was looking at life in a cell.

Maybe it was a blessing he died before his reckoning was due. Maybe it was no accident at all.

The second, and perhaps more important, thing is: stray bullets don’t care about your looming court date.

Dad had a habit of cleaning his guns while he was drunk, nursing a whiskey in one hand while he polished the gleaming barrels with the other. Pointless, really, because the guns were always pristine to begin with. Dick Harrington didn’t hunt. Didn’t shoot. Claimed the pistol was for home defense, that he kept it loaded in case anyone ever tried to hurt his family, but Steve knew the truth.

His dad just liked to flirt with death. Liked to handle pretty, deadly things, stroke his fingers over ruthless metal and feel the rush of power when he walked away unscathed.

He didn’t walk away that night.

Didn’t even face death standing.

Sliced through his femoral artery and rolled right out of his chair.

They found him lying on the ground in a dark, sticky puddle, gasping like a fish as blood spurted from his thigh. Crazy how fast it happened. Steve had been in his room when the shot rang out, and he barely managed to reach the bottom of the stairs before the gurgling noises stopped. Just boom! whizz! bang! and Dick Harrington was gone.

Maybe it’s a good thing, too, that they lost the house.

The image of his mother in the hallway that night — shellshocked in the doorway, one pale hand shaking in front of her open mouth, features wide and wet with waking horror as she stared into the room — was enough to make him never want to step foot in the place again.

So now they live in a rundown piece of shit on the wrong side of town, with hideous burnt orange carpet and wood paneled walls, with cracks in the ceiling and cigarette burns in the walls, some parting gifts from whatever feral hick lived there before them, and it feels like another cruel, cosmic joke. Like the universe is delighting in the Harringtons’ comeuppance; like the blackened beams and brick rubble of Starcourt are all twisting to form one great, mocking mouth; the better to smile and laugh at their misfortune.

You bought your bed, now you have to lie in it.

He didn’t even know that the Harringtons owned Forest Hills until it was the only asset left to their name.

He’s pretty sure his dad bought it more as a joke than a genuine investment. Meant to teach Steve a lesson, like how he used to bring home Waffle House applications whenever Steve got a C on a report card. This is your future if you don’t straighten up, son.

Kill yourself, dad.

Oh, wait.

You already did.

—

part 4

[atiianeishaunted]

blue writing is lance's notes fyi anyway uhh character bios below !! long ass writing warning but worth it i promise chat pspsp | no notes version AND the transparent PNGS down at the end!

character bios:

Allura [???] | A lone princess who is burnt out and stressed out her mind, her only solace/stress relief being the garden she has where she can have peace and quiet, shutting her brain off while she does the tasks of tending to her precious plants and bugs. She tries her best to remain as friendly and optimistic as possible, if not for her own sanity, however thanks to the stress and pressure put on her, she has a tendency to lose her cool and sometimes shut down entirely. She has a passion for commanding and loves honing her fighting skills as that was one of the ways she bonded with her father. She more often than not can be seen in comfortable clothes, she doesnt mind dresses and does enjoy dressing up but will only do it when shes going out the castle or theres a meeting. | this gal couldve been an burnt out autistic queen DREAMWORKS, YOU COUDLVE MADE HER ICONIC .... let her be a dorky nerd whos a hater sometimes, pretty please

Takashi Shirogane | A garrison commander (no one is really sure of his job title to be honest with you..) who's insanely passionate about his job, to the point where hes willing to sacrifice it all if the garrison wills it. Anything to serve. He tries his best to fit in and be hip with the kids, he tries to come across as the 'chill' teacher, but students of his have reported that after a few months, any amount of chillness is thrown out the window. If not that, hes often not even in class, too busy doing missions he wasnt assigned to. He's intense. Very intense. Knows his way around words though for the most part, can be very convincing and a bit maniuplative, very goal driven. He means well though? Thats what he says. He always throws a quick sorry if someone brings it up with him, so that must mean something. | sorry in advance if you follow along with Sonder's story... unrelated but dreamworks wrote a banger antagonist without even realizing!

"Keith" Kogane / "Morse" | Unknown origins. He was a talented garrison pilot who could practically fly with his eyes closed, a jack of all trades, short tempered and prone to losing it but all things considered, the perfect cadet for the garrison's goals, he came out of nowhere practically, just poofed in like a ghost and wiped the floor with everyone. He really just needed a good guiding hand. No one is quite sure what gender he is, his androgynous appearance and tendency to respond to anything besides being called a girl have people baffled to say the least. He's very clearly not all there in the head either which goes hand in hand with his odd bursts of ego and then odd bursts of whining, these bursts often include talks that could only be described as cult-ish. People have their theories. Beyond those bursts, hes mostly very deadpan and quiet. But despite his strength and that intense feeling of fear and dread people get when they're around him, he's.. popular, somehow. Admired greatly for his devilish good looks. A universal appeal if you will. He doesn't seem to notice. Or perhaps doesnt care. Either way he's far too busy following Shiro around and treating him like the second coming of god to really indulge in romance for now. Lance's self proclaimed rival, Keith is also unaware of this. | also sorry in advance for this one if you follow sonder's storyline Lance McClain | A former Garrison cargo pilot who moved up in rank when Keith got kicked out. Keith is his rival and also all that Lance can talk about, even after the guy got kicked out and left for dead (Lance overheard some things while sneaking out past the teacher's lounge). He has a very noticable personality and loves to be the center of attention, hes still finding his footing and figuring out what he wants to do with his life and who he wants to be. Despite his many claims, hes not all that popular. He can't really flirt with girls all too well. His general goal is to be so well known so he won't ever be forgotten, hence why he begged his mom to let him dye his hair and get piercings (if he used Keith as an argument, thats none of your business.) (he saw keith dying his hair once or twice and instantly wanted to copy, its a bad habit.). He loves LOVES taking care of his appearance and is fairly vain, he has extensive routines and will freak out if he can't follow them. His ego and overbearing confidence is all to drown out his deep insecurities and fears. He tries his best to come across as a suave, cool, charming, awesome, any positive adjective really, person but in all reality he's a mama's boy, a dork, a loser if you will who has a love for the retro and is a huge gamer. If he must admit, he and Keith'd get along great actually, Keith ticks alot of boxes and honestly Lance deeply admires him and wants to be like him. | dreamworks dropped that lance was a gamer and loved retro stuff and then never talked about it again. sigh. Hunk Garrett | Hunk has many passions, mainly inspired by parents, he mainly specializes in cooking and mechanics, he enjoys tinkering with things, taking them apart to see how they work and working from there to see if he can rebuild it with 0 instruction, hes gotten good at it. He's Lance's childhood best friend, they're extremely close and are often seen constantly poking fun at eachother. Its all in good fun though. Hunk struggles extremely with anxiety and has a service dog back home that he left at home when heading to the Garrison as he worried he couldn't take care of it while studying. Despite his anxiety, he quite enjoys talking to people and sharing things he enjoys with them, he often tries to get over his fears by branching out and | I looked up his name from the old show because he deserves an 'actual' name, free my boy, he was done so dirty, also i remember when we all thought hunk had two moms (or was that just me ..) and i live by it tbh, two moms and a dad whos still active in his life, 3 whole parents for the greatest fella ever

Pidge Holt | Not much can be said about Pidge, they keep to themselves and don't share much about themselves. Just like Keith, their gender is often up to debate and when asked, Pidge will never give a consistent answer. They're a major tech wiz and with their talents, they're a complete menace. Pidge is prone to being mischevious and pranking others, often taking jokes a bit too far. They're egotistical and find that robots are their preferred companions in comparison to humans. | loser chronically online 13 year old who would tell you to kys, matt probably has to take away their electronics all the time LMFAO purposely made their outfit look a bit strange bc , theyre a kid whos a NERD /aff let them dress a bit stupid and let them cringe at it 5 years later ty

No notes version and PNGS below :-)

im insane about this reboot!! please reblog and im willing to elaborate if anyone wants me to <333 hrgfhrfg i really want this to take off bwaa

[rebeltigera]

Haiii!! I got question:

Do you have any head-canons for mk? Mac? Wuk?

And what is your personal opinion on season 5?

I am responding second time because the first one didn't send :'D

Pls end me.

I don't remember the headcanons I've mustered out the first time damnit -

*sigh*

Those are general ones , I use the design of the character most of the time to show headcanons

For MK

-He's wasted after one beer.

-his tail subconsciously curl against legs of his friends or person he trust

-he chirp subconsciously

-he don't like bitter things like dark chocolate

For Wukong

- he got thick , strong curly fur . When fluffed up texture it reminds of the dust brush

- his body temperature is much higher due to the furnace punishment

-gets headaches due to the circlet (phantom pain)

-he speak and read fluently ancient Chinese , however he got problems with modern language

-he usually sleeps with lil monkeys around

-he can't get drunk.

-monkeys take care of his fur

For Mac

- his ears are too delicate for piercings. They would hurt.

- thin , straight/wavy fur like smoke . He can't stand cold

- he can always hear past and present but future is randomly whispering to him

- he got lower body temperature (due to the shadow nature)

- when drunk he looks like a beast but he's a snuggly wuggly teddy bear

-he takes care of his fur regularly himself

For Mei (because it's lacking in other categories and I don't remember more :'D)

- When she fights she tunes into imaginary music in the background. Like Gwen from spiderverse 2

About S5

*sigh* Vent warning. not directed at anyone in particular

I am unable to put up presentable opinion on this season

Also warning to everyone that will read it

If you are here to defend/ you are touchy on subject of S5 please avert your eyes.

The season was mid at best. , script was rushed, the core of it was S3 with meek antagonist, the most evil character there was a bug demon with many eyes, and SACRIFICE was basically word for this season.

Other things I remember from it is a burnt dumpling and Nezha's mech. Oh and Wukong being useless, Mac carrying season on his back , MK being even more stupid than usual. A random guy with a pagoda and a Twink snake. Nothing else .

Let's put my opinion about the animation now :D

Flying Bark got sacrificed just like MK in this season lol

The animation was a pure nightmare, it's like Seven deadly sins Incident

And if you guys think it will get much better from that in one year (let's say for example they will produce another season next year) you live high on copium and delulu.

Our juicy yummy frame by frame animation was taken away and they gave us RAGDOLL animation.

What does it mean? -AND HERE TUMBLR DECIDED TO CRASH ON ME AND IM WRITING IT 3rd TIME :D- you know how hieroglyphs are animated? Ye, that's basically it with extra steps! HOW FUN. NOW WE HAVE PUPPETS 2D. A FREAKING GACHA FROM YT IF YOU MUST. THOSE IN SOME CASES ARE EVEN BETTER ANIMATED THAN OUR SHOW ITSELF BTW. This has it's perks! I guess. It's cheaper and easier to make episodes! :D the cons are we will no longer see good battles in the show. yay "But we saw Wukong vs MK! And snippet of Wukong vs Mac fight!" please, spare me. If you are telling me those were good fights , that is half assed animation they have no idea how works and two dots clashing with eachother you should go rewatch other seasons. the fucking disgrace and audacity.

But no matter. That i can live off, that i can gulp down.

YOU KNOW WHAT I CAN'T? THE SHEER AMOUNT OF MISTAKES ON BASIC LVL IN ART. I am sitting here looking at those colors, those lines this fucking scenography and ask- what a fucking newbie did this .

YOU CAN'T EVEN GET COLOR RIGHT

AND BEFORE ANY OF U F NERDS WILL COME TO ME AND SAY "UUU ACTUALLY ITS LIGHTING FAULT-" NO ITS FUCKING NOT.

THEY CAN'T EVEN USE SAME COLORS AS IN THE PRIOR SHOT , THEY CANT EVEN SAMPLE IT PROPERLY . BETWEEN THOSE SHOTS NOTHING CHANGE THEREFORE THE LIGHTING IS THE FUCKING SAME

IF YOU DON'T DRAW , AND HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT , JUST -

we have a shiny wukong here

What is this scene , please someone can explain to me the scenography of this

Why this perspective is wrong, the shading, the lack of lighting

Here characters don't even stand properly

WHAT IS WITH THIS AWKWARD SCENOGRAPHY ?

WHY THEY ALL LOOK OUT OF PLACE. AND IM NOT EVEN TALKING ABOUT THIS SHADING BECAUSE ITS SHIT.

HAVE THEY MISSED LIKE ALL BASIC LESSONS IN ART SCHOOLS? OR SOMETHING? LIKE THIS IS A JOKE. NO WONDER PEOPLE THOUGHT TRAILER WAS FAN MADE.

Now this- this is just hillarious.

Just add to it some dramatic intense sound effect and we have another nightmare.

The voice acting was great tho

[noxturnalmoth]

°~Death becomes Us~°

Chapter 8: Bowlcut wearing twink manlet

warnings: suggestive jokes, kay why ess jokes, overall meme-ism, college shit, scara x f!reader

After waking up to a pretty bad hangover at 2 p.m, and spending the whole day groaning at my sore muscles from jumping fences when I hadn't in months, Shinobu and I made our way to the bathroom. One on the toilet, one in the shower, and then an exchange of positions made by sluggish bodies as the one who is done cleaning herself goes to wake herself up from the hungover haze.

"Remind me to never do this ever again." I mumble as i wash my face and she laughs. "As if, we both know it will, especially with those dudes. But we do got momma's boy with us so we're pretty safe all things considered." I hear from the shower.

I sigh, knowing she's right. "He ain't a momma's boy, don't let him hear you say that crap or he's gonna wring you like a wet towel." I say, leaving the bathroom to get ready in my own room, picking out makeup and clothes that scream 'end of term party, i'm not a nerd for tonight, i'm a bad bitch'. And it's at 6:30 p.m that Shinobu and I are finally done with our preparations and we get to the outside of the dorms, making our way to the other side of the campus, a long walk that makes me regret my choice of shoes but beauty is pain and I look really fucking good.

"I mean do you think what we brought was enough?" I say worried at the few bottles and snacks we brought. "Well we're nine people, if everyone brought something, we'll have more than enough. Plus we'll probably order." I nod anxiously at her words and Shinobu puts her arm around my shoulder lovingly. "Really, we already love you tons, all of us, i don't know about Scara cuz he's an ass, but at least almost all of us do. You don't need to prove anything by being an overly giving person." I breathe out a shaky sigh and hold her hand that lays on my upper arm, nodding at her as we get closer to the dorms Heizou and Scara live in.

Getting there we knock, the door opened by a smiling Kazuha who welcomes us in, and as we take off our shoes I'm lifted off the ground. "Hey bug!" "Sup you big burly hunk." We laugh as Wriothesley hugs me tight, leading us to the living room where everybody was.

"You're late." Grumbled a familiar bitter voice. "Well, we took time getting ready to look good. The same couldn't be said about you, you twink manlet." I say to the indigo haired man as I ruffle his hair, him being just a little taller than me. With that he scoffs with a smirk. "At least I don't have to litterally hide how I really look to look decent, uggo." I fake spit on his feet as i turn to go greet the rest of the boys, hugging and making small talk as we start to set up the snacks, food and drinks.

"Thanks again for my earphones Y/N, really. They mean so much to me, being bought by Teucer with the money he made at his first part time job, I was losing it thinking they were gone." Ajax, less rowdy than behind a screen, tells me softly as he takes glasses from the cupboard above me and i smile at him. "No problem, you got a family you cherish, they give you things that you cherish aswell. I couldn't just leave you like this. But you should also thank Scara, he's the one who asked me."

He hums and said he did, that he was even surprised at how 'gentle' the indigo haired boy had been. "He's hardened, bitter and angry, full of resentment. But he ain't a bad guy, if he didn't like you he wouldn't have given you an out. He's just terrified of letting people in."

I nod, relating to what was said, truth is i'm afraid too, of all these new friends. What if it's all just make believe. What if they all hate me, now or in the future. What if I'm just a means to an end. I know that I'll have Wriothesley no matter what, but...I want the group aswell. All of them, with their qualities and flaws, because being around them in college was the first time I ever felt like I belonged. It's my driving force along my harsher, rage fueled need to defend and protect people by becoming a medical examiner.

The evening rolls around, and drinks, food and a few joints are shared as conversations flow. A peaceful yet energic, joyful atmosphere filling the room, the cold, crisp december air forgotten for the warmth of good company as people cheer on Ajax and Wriothesley while they play just dance, constantly one upping one another as we all sang along to the songs. Shinobu and I dancing in the back while Cyno and Heizou join, our own dance party starting before we switch places with those on the game.

"I bet I can outdance the bowlcut wearing twink manlet." I say confidently, stretching for my fifth dance of the night, everybody laughing and spuring us on 'fight, fight, fight' chanted as Scaramouche circled around me, scowling before a devious smirk appears on his face. "Only if your fat ass can even move as well as I can." "AWWW Thanks! My ass IS phat. Continue like this and i might think you got a crush on me Scaradouche." "I'm gonna fucking shank you." "Try me Beyoncé."

And dance we did, trying to hold up until the other collapsed, winning as many times as we could. And it went on, and on, the elated and loud chanting persevering until we both collapsed. "I win, midget." I pant, sweating and panting as i lay like a starfish on the ground. "Fucking whatever you fence hopping orphan." I raise my eyebrows at his insult, mustering up my best shocked face and everybody gasped. He slowly turns red, stuttering out what seems to be him trying to explain himself and maybe even appologize.

But then I laugh softly and tap his shoulder. "Can't say you're wrong about that bud." And I go play cards with the rest of the guys. Cyno wiping the floor with all of us although Xiao, Kazuha and Heizou do get close to bringing him down. By the end of the few rounds, Wriothesley and Ajax go do shots in the kitchen Xiao, Shinobu, and Heizou lazily and drunkenly lounge on the couch while Kazuha rolls a few joints, handing one to me as i go to the balcony, sitting on the freezing floor.

Lighting it up i take a deep inhale of the smoke, the disgusting taste ignored as i feel myself relax deeper. My body wrapped with a fluffy fleece blanket to combat the cold autumn air. "What the fuck are you doing out in the cold you dimwit?" I hear from behind me and sigh, snuggling deeper in the fleece. "Just needed some quiet, and a bit of fresh air. It kinda got stuffy in there." I chuckle, eyes lazily dragging to Scaramouche, who sits down next to me. "You're gonna get sick you manwhore." "You're also dressed lightly, you slut." He says as I open my blanket and wrap some of it against him, the sudden proximity feeling strange. But not necessarily bad.

Silence overcomes us as he lights up his own joint, go big or go home is what he said, and so I continued smoking mine looking up to the twinkling stars and bright full moon. It was nice, no energy exherted into silly banter that could dissolve in a fight, and although it had never happened Scaramouche can be a bit harsh and hurtful and I know that if I had just about enough I would bite his face off. I didn't want that out of respect not only for him and my friends, but also to myself.

"Why?" I turn to him confused and hum in question. "Why did you do the things you did when you were younger." I breathe in, inhaling smoke, and hum pensively as i blow it out. "Well you're no stranger to horrible parents right?" He nods. "Well, when horrible parents become even worse, and that you're a desperate child trying to stay alive, you quickly realize nobody will help you. That much was clear after doing my very best to beg for it. So I turned to petty crimes and felonies, getting myself in juvi for warm food, a roof over my head, and hygene amenities. Not great but no organization helped in this town, they all contacted my parents first, as if asking an abuser if they abused someone is gonna make them spit it out." I scoff, gripping the blanket. I saw from my peripheral vision that Scaramouche was looking at me but decided not to look back, in fear of what I'd see.

"Your mom brought me back there a lot, even if i was screaming, crying, begging. And she was the one to always bring me to juvi. And then the last time she did I was 17. Killed my folks. She trialled me as an adult because she was tired of me and sent me to jail, the judge was kind enough to realize it was in self defence so I only got a couple of years. Then started living as a civilian in a special refuge for 'reforming criminals', I decided to study to become a medical examiner, and now I'm 22 and I started those studies as a first step to say fuck you to the world, to your mom, and to become a better person that helps lock up assholes and bring peace to both the dead and the living. Plus, dead people aren't assholes, so I don't have to worry too much about wanting to bash someone's brains in."

I chuckle, shaking lightly with emotion and from the cold, misty eyes trying to blink tears away and failing. Without any words Scaramouche got closer, our shoulders and arms fully touching so we could share our heat. And silently i place my head on his shoulder, sighing softly as he tenses up and slowly relaxes again.

"Wriothesley's the only one who visited me in prison, we met when we were 12 in juvi. He was my partner in crime, then my friend, then my brother." "He's a good guy." I hear scaramouche say softly. "Nah, he's the best." He hums in agreement.

"She wasn't always like this." I breathe in, closing my eyes as i listen to his voice, his chest rumbling uncomfortably at the feeling of telling someone about something so personal. "She was a good mom, to me and to my half sister Shoko. A single mom to the both of us. Shoko was a bright kid, she was loving, kind, energetic. She died in a drunk driving accident, the whole bus did. SInce that case, Ei became cold, bitter, forceful, controlling. To the whole police department, but also to me. My step mother's the only one to know how to deal with her. God knows I stopped trying a long time ago after all the words, all the hits." He scoffs, bitterness seeping from every single one of his pores as he sniffles, the cold freezing his sinuses, the smoke from the joint roughing up his throat and lungs...eyes glazed.

"The way she brought me up, she made me hate people like you. Who needed to do anything to stay alive. I hated you for a long time before I realized what she was doing. Because to me you were part of the reason why Shoko died. Foolish, I know." He mutters. "But understandable. I hated you as a kid because I thought you had it easy, because you were your mother's son. Turns out, in a way, you and I aren't different."

"No, that's for sure. I committed petty crimes for rebellion and attention. They're not even in my file, she didn't accept the fact I could taint her reputation." I snort at this, pointing out the ridicule situation of the police chief's son committing crimes. "Damn Scaramouche, you're a bad boy huh?" I nudge him, raising and dropping my eyebrows fast as I smirked and he chuckled breathily. "We're past the monikers, call me Kuni." "Now THAT's adorable. Kuni. Kuniiiiiii. Kuuuuuuuuuniiiiii-" "Oh fuck off or I'm taking back that privilege AND cut you off." He huffs, smirking.

"Nah you won't now that we told each other our tragic backstories. Plus I'm still waiting for that free Brazilian too. You're stuck with me forever now." "Eat shit and die you fence hopping orphan." "Not before you do you bowlcut wearing twink manlet."

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After a hard youth of commiting crimes and going to juvi to have a place to live, you finally decide to take your future in your own hands and make it into something you can be proud of. College is the beginning of your path to a new life, and it would be going great...if the son of the head of the local police wasn't hanging out with your friends.

Taglist: @kodzusmiles @vi0let-writes @eternallykira-143

[multi-fandom-friend]

Simon Riley’s little “quirks”

A/N this is just a bunch of random weird things that I think Simon does

Warnings: Just a bunch of swearing and mentions of guns

🕷️ the bitch thinks bugs are so cool. Like actually has a soft spot of all animals but bugs are his favorite

🕷️ doesn’t care what kind. If he sees one on a mission he’ll just glance at it and smile under his mask

🕷️ twirls his handgun on his finger all the time. Like no reason he just does

🕷️ the one animal he hates are giraffes. He can’t understand why a mammal has to have such a long ass neck. 🕷️ Dino nerd when he was little. When he goes home he has bins of his old Dino merch from when he was younger and sometimes he’ll take it out and look through everything

🕷️ hates babies. Can’t stand them. At all. They cry too much and they look weird to him. 🕷️ he’ll just zone out sometimes and then soap will wave a hand in front of his face and he’ll just grunt and say “I heard what you were saying dumbass.” 🕷️ actually kinda likes coffee. But it needs to have a lot of creamer or sugar or something. Won’t drink it black. Too bitter

🕷️ huge on mental health for his friends, sucks with his own. He just needs a kiss.

[donutwatches]

MHA 2.25 - Encounter - part 1/3

I have finally gotten to the last episode of season 2! It only took me...roughly 100,000 years.

You know, Ol' Chap Lips really needs to work on his social skills. It sounds like he is talking about a tacky outfit instead of people, lol. "That's an ugly purse, and it doesn't even match the shoes."

He is just jealous that the newbies all want to join Staingina George's plastics club, and only want to be around Shigaraki's Lindsay Lohan ass, because they think he's friends with Queen Stain.

It only took 20 seconds for them to try to kill each other. How is Shigaraki going to handle leading a group of villains? He has 0 self-restraint.

Everyone looks crushed, except Denki, who looks like he smoked a blunt before coming to class.

Why is this the happiest I have ever seen Aizawa? He is the kind of guy that pretends he got you charcoal for Christmas when he secretly bought you the biggest gift under the tree.

Good logic! It would make no sense to leave behind the kids that need the most help to improve. I am so happy that everyone gets to go to the summer camp together.

SHOPPING TRIP WHOO! I haven't been to a mall in years. This episode kinda made me nostalgic.

Here we can see the resident bird man regretting taking a nerd out in public. Can't take Deku anywhere, I swear.

Why is everyone attacking Deku today? He just came here to have a good time! They really hit him with 'you scare children', and 'you 're a bug', back to back. Then they DITCHED him!

OH SHIIIIII---------------------------------------------------------(garaki). Man, he has the most recognizable voice. I do not know why he is pretending right now.

Click here for Part 2

Click here for the masterlist

TAGLIST

@granny-griffin, @blackaquokat, @hyperfixations-and-cringe, @champion-prism, @jessiedead

[miguellover07]

Ughhh, may I request something,well umm do u remember those wattpad nerd story (that had to deal with nerds girl who no one really had an interest,then boom someone is interested in them and they just called them ugly ass,but the nerds always weared baggy clothes and big glasses) that was popular there, well I wanted to ask

Nerd!reader(female) x rich!popular!Miguel

Highschool/college au

Who is an new kid(miguel) come to school already become popular and all the talk of the town ,he was just incredibly annoyed by all these girl jumping onto to him like an bug going toward the sun,and the fucking guys that say there he best friends,he would just shut them up,and make fun of them,he was fed up with people telling him what happening with today's drama or shit,he just wanted to had fun,I mean just because he was rich doesn't he was lazy,that's when he wanted to find an place that quiet and clam he went to the library, that where he saw reader,(who he never saw her before,he just thought she was an new kid) nerd!reader who was wearing headphones underneath her hoodie (listening to music of course) while studying,she seem peaceful,but knowing him he would just sat down next in the same table as her,

AND THE REST IS UP TO u (Idk what to do)

Always have an wonderful day😘😘😇

Study buddy

Around 1100 words, fluff, rich!Miguel x nerdfem!reader

After finally getting rid of these annoying classmates of his, he found his way to the school library.

He was already so frustrated and grumpy by them. They don't understand that he simply doesn´t care who fucked with whom or who holds the best parties.

This year he wants to improve his grades to the impossible, so only A´s are allowed. This means no parties, no drama or any kind of burden for him.

The reason is that he wants to be worthy of his parents company.

He wants them to be proud of him and inherit it to him because he deserves it and not due to the fact that he is their eldest son.

That´s why right now he's standing in the math section and looks through the books and after a bit of searching he finds the books he needs for practacing.

Luckily the math section is mostly empty except for a group who are probably working on a project together and a girl.

Before searching for a seat, he decides to regard the girl for some minutes.

Her oversized hoodie has a big image on the back which tells him that she is a fan of the same comic as him.

He sees her removing the glasses and rubbing her already bloodshot eyes and she seems worried and frustrated.

So, he decides to sit next to her, taking out his school supplies such as notebook, calculator and some pencils.

Perhaps it would be a good idea to befriend her so that he can have a study buddy and they could help each other out.

As he sits down next to her, he notices the small spider-man earrings and he can't help but feel excited because he also likes him.

Even her earphones are designed in the colour red and blue which implies that they must be customised.

She rests her head in her hands and Miguel guesses that she is either at the brick of a breakdown or just taking a break.

"Need help?" he causally asks her as he takes her notes to see with what she is fighting.

The moment he starts speaking is exactly where her song switches to another one, so in this little second she hears him right next to her.

Startled, she jumps in her chair, putting a hand on her heart "Gosh, I didn´t see you coming..."

And Miguel can´t help but find her slow reaction adorable.

She slowly takes her headphones off and sighs while blushing intensly. The new kid talked to her? And even offers his help?

No way, this must be a prank, most people don´t even recognize her which she is extremly thankful for since she has seen how the popular kids bully the nerds or basically everbody who isn´t filthy rich or at least good looking.

But she needs help or else she will fail her math class and studying alone won't get her far.

"I don't even know what I´m doing..." she would whisper embarrassed.

Humming, he starts opening one of her books and takes a minute to read himself in this topic.

All the while she puts her glasses back on to get a better sight of him.

It´s like she is looking at a model, his skin looks so smooth and his hair is so fluffy and voluminous.

His sharp features makes him so much hotter but to stop her emberassing blushing, she tries looking at the books before her.

After understanding the topic, he leans back and starts explaining it to her, without making her feel stupid which only makes her more attracted to him.

He even put his arm behind her to lean a bit closer towards her and his other hand keeps pointing to the book while sometimes scribbling on her notes.

Nodding eagerly as she finally understood what her problem was and how it workes.

She can´t help and turn to him as she gives him a tired but happy smile since this session took over 2 hours of him just explaining and calculating together.

"Thank you so much for your help, I don´t know what I would do without you," expressing her graditute while packing her stuff "Could I perhaps repay you?"

Miguel leans back and packs his schoolbag as well "How about before we start our next time we have lunch together? I´m still new here and don´t know my way around and I don´t know if you´ve already had the chance to explore our school"

Confusion is written over her face "What do you mean?" she chuckles akwardly.

"Aren´t you new here as well?" he raises a brow and is seemingly confused now.

Chuckling she explains "No no no, I´ve been in this town since birth so I actaully do know my way around, I could be your guide if you like" she puts her hand before her giggling mouth to hide it and Miguel again can´t help but find her adorable with the whole behaviour and looks.

Everything she does just suits her.

"Oh sorry, I don´t know why I automatically assumed you were new here, but yeah I´d like to have a sweet one like you as my tour guide... ugh when I think about that one of the other could be my guide, I already get a headache"

Again she can´t help but giggle at his confession and as they two stand up, she can´t help but notice the height difference which makes her a little bit nervous again. Miguel notices it immediately which makes him smirk.

"I´m Y/N, by the way" she awkwardly introduces herself as she remebered to do it at the beginning which makes it a bit awkward again but he only leans down to hear her better and perhaps to tease her a little.

"Y/N, it´s a pretty name and it suits you perfectly... and I´m Miguel o´hara" he says with a little smirk.

🕸🕷

Hope you like this one, I somehow struggled to make him seem 'more rich' and her more 'nerdy' with the set up but I still hope you'll enjoy this one, my friend <3

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: The Golden Age of Sci Fi

Robert Heinlein: now i usually tell stories over at space coven Heinlein: but i thought I'd come over and tell you a story Heinlein: about alien puppet masters Heinlein: i call it the puppet masters Barker: are they alien? Heinlein: Heinlein: oh you've heard it?

Clive Barker: ugh space coven? Barker: those guys are the biggest nerds King: i thought you said unicorn fuck club were the biggest nerds Barker: no i said they were the biggest dorks Barker: there's a difference

Barker: nerds and dorks are totally different King: what do you mean, what's the difference? Barker: let me explain it this way Barker: you stephen are a dork Barker: but edgar is a nerd Poe: now hold on there Mary Shelley: no he's right

Heinlein: I call this story Heinlein: In the Realm of the Electric Medusas, What Measure the Measure of a Man? Heinlein: it's about a space guy who shoots aliens Heinlein: with a laser

King: what kind of aliens? Heinlein: what? King: what kind of aliens? Heinlein: oh like i dunno Heinlein: big green bug-eyed slug monsters Heinlein: you know like just your standard alien Heinlein: the one everyone's writing Heinlein: the important thing is they get shot

Heinlein: you know what i love about aliens? Heinlein: you can just beat 'em up! Pow Zap! Bang! Heinlein: shoot them with a big gun!!! Heinlein: and no pinko commie's gonna tell you to stop! ha ha! yeah! Heinlein: hey do you guys play warhammer?

Heinlein: so do you guys play warhammer? Barker: no King: not really Poe: nope Koontz: uh uh Lovecraft: no Heinlein: Heinlein: oh Heinlein: do you WANT to play warhammer?

Heinlein: see what's cool is, it's both a game and a collection Heinlein: look at these cool space marines Heinlein: pretty bad ass don't you think? Heinlein: i wish they gave them more guns tho Heinlein: so i was reading about these new rare miniatures in stormbringer magazine Barker: oh my god i'm dying

Heinlein: so anyway everyone knows the chaos space marines are the best faction cuz you can access specific Stratagems using the chaos emeralds Barker: i can't take this nerd shit Barker: [weakly] mary please Barker: [weakly] save us from these nerds Barker: [weakly] bring your shiv

Barker: hey did you see starship troopers? Heinlein: hell yeah brother!!! i love that shit! Heinlein: love when they shoot the bugs! Yeah! Heinlein: i love that shit Heinlein: UNIRONICALLY!

Heinlein: starship troopers movie is so cool Heinlein: i love it! Heinlein: it's totally what i saw in my head when i wrote the book! Heinlein: they captured my ideas perfectly! Heinlein: what Heinlein: what's so funny

Barker: haha you dingus, it was a satire! they were making fun of you haha Heinlein: what? shut up! Heinlein: stop mocking me! Heinlein: I'm a serious hard science fiction writer! Heinlein: I predicted the water bed!

Heinlein: bang! pow! i love killing aliens! Heinlein: oh, you're different than me huh alien? huh? is that it?! Heinlein: where the fuck do you get off?! Heinlein: [miming gun] bang! bang! Heinlein: and that's why i'm a member of the SFWA

[creaturecomfxrts]

Dipper and Mabel pines headcanons?

FINALLY getting around to answering these! since im better at them, heres some college age headcanons that apply just as much to how i view them in the show!

DIPPER PINES

transmasc. duh. of course

parents are INCREDIBLY supportive, super understanding. hes on hormone blockers in the show and starts HRT as soon as hes able, getting top surgery and bottom surgery in his early 20s

bisexual! ran into a guy junior year of highschool and went oh GOD. this is wendy 2.0 im going to die

NERD.

LOVES board games. so much. not just dungeons and dragons and monopoly im talkin everdell, wingspan, cascadia, catan. he loves a good think. he also loves dragging everyone else into playing them with him. he always wins. almost always, anyway

absolutely adores college and everything about it hes a little freak. totally ends up being the president of a few clubs, co creating some, etc. made an occult club AND a hiking club at his college

loves doodling, loves horror. his teachers? not so much. they try not to look at the weird ass creatures he draws on the margins of his very well written homework.

probably goes into something smart. like biochem. or um. stem. im (author) is a liberal arts major all i do is write gay fanfiction.

PSYCHOTIC ASS DORM ROOM. he barely decorated it like a classic college male but has a conspiracy board and thats it. which is full of strange shit hes seen outside of gravity falls. to be fair its very well documented and somewhat neat, just…. strange decor. he lives in a single (introvert)

COVERED in tattoos, but always abides by the suit rule (all tattoos need to be able to be covered by a suit to be professional. he knows this bc hes a neerrrrddd). he has really sick sleeves of runes and other occult like things hes found interesting. he has cipher related tattoos as well and also even got ford to design a few.

he has PROMINENT eye bags. he will never fix his sleep schedule

ended up working as a summer camp counselor for a while right outside if gravity falls! the kids loved him but he couldnt stand the heat and bugs all the time so he only did it for a summer or two

even after turning 21 he doesnt actually drink that much, hes a craft beer enjoyer and likes to make it himelf (Much later in life)

ALWAYS stays in touch with mabel. if anything happens in either of their lives you better BELIEVE theyre already on the phone with eachother

medical marijuana card holder

smokes to help eith his anxiety. it works WONDERS

coffee drinker but actually Does put cream and sugar is coffee. sometimes. other times hes too tired and just thugs it out

MABEL PINES

THE number one it girl ever

NUMBER ONE TRANS ALLY EVERRRRRR she loves her brother so much

pansexual!! she loves cool people, thats her motto

went to a fashion design school, is loving it despite drowning in work

began dying her hair in cool ways through highschool, now she always has some of her natural color present but goes a little crazy on the highlights

found out about huge dangley joke earrings. went absolutely crazy. has an entire space on her desk dedicated to her many many earrings. she has babies, knives, bags of doritos, aliens, glow in the dark ones, anything you could imagine.

fantastic at fashion design. stuggled a lot with the fancier stuff but her teachers were floored when they let her go wild on casual comfy wear. she excells in combining fashion and comfort in really exciting and colorful ways.

a party girl through and through, loves clubs, raves, concerts, anything!

video game lover as well, cracked at pvp games.

still boy crazy, just less so (has had like. 10 college boyfriends)

literally the sweetest friend ever. she loves hosting movie nights and tea parties (bc who wouldnt. theyre awesome)

tea drinker, loves floral teas with honey

HATES. black coffee. a starbucks frap girlie 4ever

has been scouted for modeing multiple times and only accepted when it was a commercial with puppies

love love loves making friendshio bracelets. knows all the patterns, all of her friends have a hefty amount of a bunch of different ones because she just keeps making them

anywwy, here you go! i love these two so much, i hope ive done them justice!

[flufallo]

Um.... I found a random quote generator

Cat king: Hello all, it is I, your favorite person.

Charles: Actually, Edwin is my favourite.

Cat king: Okay then, it is I, that bitch.

Edwin: Do you have a self-care routine?

Jenny: "Keep going bitch" said to myself in different accents.

Charles : Do you guys want to see a butterfly?

Niko: Ooh, yes please!

Jenny, with their laptop open: I'm not going to stop working to look at a stupid bug!

Charles: It's not a bug though...

Jenny: ...

Niko: ...

Jenny: Well I still don't want to see.

Niko, realizing: Please don't throw-

Charles : Whee! *throws a stick of butter*

Monty: Edwin keeps forgetting which WiFi network they're supposed to use.

Monty: So I renamed ours to "Edwin, use this one" to help them out a little.

Charles: How would you like your coffee?

Crystal : As dark and as bitter as my soul.

Charles, shouting to someone behind the counter: I need one vanilla latte with extra cream and sugar!

Cat king: Fuck you.

Esther : No u.

Cat king: I'm down.

Esther : You're like 2, what the fuck-

Cat king: I AM NOT 2!

Cat king: Monty is a strings kid. We must sacrifice them to the band gods.

Charles: Yes.

Crystal : You're right. It'd be a good initiation for me.

Monty: Wait, guys, what about the truce we signed-

Charles: What truce?

Cat king: *sigh* The truce that we must destroy all the choir kids and leave the strings alone.

Esther : Wait, I'm a choir kid!

Everyone else: *prepares for sacrifice*

Squad reactions to being called straight:

Jenny: The fuck, no I'm not.

Edwin : Excuse the hell out of you?

Cat king: Ding dong, you are wrong!

Charles: Who told you that? And why did they lie?

Niko: Rude.

Esther : *punches the person*

Cat king: FIGHT ME, YOU NERD ASS SLUT!

Esther : At least try to sound slightly more sophisticated when you threaten someone.

Cat king: Oh, I'm sorry. I should ask; dost thou want to engage in a duel, my good bitch?

Esther : Somehow that's worse

Jenny: Well, if you're not at least a little bit gay for your friends, then what kind of friend are you?

Monty: What makes a bigger memory than a passionate kiss?

Edwin: A stab wound.

Jenny: You are now one day closer to eating your next plate of nachos.

Monty: That's the most hopeful thing I've ever heard.

Niko: But what if I die tomorrow and never eat any nachos?

Crystal : Then tomorrow is nacho lucky day.

Niko: I just want someone to take me out.

Crystal : On a date?

Cat king: With a sniper gun?

Esther : Both if you're not a coward.

Esther : OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT?! TIME OUT! GET ON TOP OF THE FRIDGE! GET UP THERE!

Monty: *Climbing* THIS HOUSE IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE!!!

Cat king: Is this mistletoe?

Edwin: Uh, no, no, that is basil.

Cat king: Too bad cause if it was mistletoe I was gonna kiss you.

Edwin: Yeah, no, it’s still basil.

Charles: You know what’s funny about Edwin? They’re my best friend, and anyone who’d hurt them is someone I’d murder, probably.

Charles: I’ve only had Edwin for a day and a half but if anything happened to them I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.

Cop: What are your names?

Esther: Don't tell them, Cat king.

Cop, writing: Cat king...

Esther: Crap.

Cat king: Nice going, Esther.

Cop:

Cat king: Uh oh.

Monty: I’m taking a look at your numbers, and it doesn’t look good. You have a lot of measurements. Quite a few variables.

Charles: Is that… bad?

Monty: Variables are the #1 risk factor for outcomes. The past is a big contributor to the future.

Charles: Isn’t that just causality?

Monty: Causality is the leading cause of death in this country.

Charles: So what are my odds?

Monty: Do you have a family history?

Charles: Of what?

Monty: Just, in general.

Charles: …Yes?

Monty: Oh no.

Niko, texting Edwin : *sends a voice message*

Edwin , texting back: I’m a little busy, is it urgent?

Niko: No, don’t worry, just listen later.

*later*

Edwin : *presses play*

Niko's voice message: THERE’S A FIRE-

Monty: Onion rings are vegetable donuts.

Esther , used to Monty being dumb: Sure...

Monty: Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed.

Esther : Okay?

Monty: Lasagna is spaghetti flavored cake.

Esther :

Monty: Lobsters are mermaid scorpio-

Esther : Jesus, that one is a little-

Jenny, interested: No, no, Monty, keep going.

Crystal : But we’re friends! I was building up to calling you a nickname soon!

Edwin: That’ll never happen! In fact, you just lost “Edwin” privileges. From now on, you can call me by my last name or ‘Hey, you.’.

Crystal : Come on, Edwin.

Edwin: *glares*

Crystal : Come on, Hey you.”

Crystal : That shirt looks great, Charles.

Charles: Thanks.

Crystal : But I bet it would look even better on Edwin's floor.

Edwin: Are you hitting on Charles... for me?

Cat king: What do we think of Monty?

*pause*

Charles: *sighs* Nice pal.

Crystal : I think they're gay.

Esther : What am I supposed to do?

Monty: If I were you? I’d try and make peace with whatever deity, pantheon, or Divine Other you believe in.

Esther : I’m an atheist.

Monty: Then just get ready to die I guess

*playing twister*

Crystal : Right hand red.

Charles: *ends up on top of Edwin *

Edwin: You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?

Crystal : I stopped spinning like 15 minutes ago. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't notice

Cat king: So... who's the big spoon and who's the little spoon?

Edwin: We're chopsticks!

Cat king: Well... that's cute!

Cat king: Does that mean you two snuggle together perfectly?

Charles: No, it means that if you take the other away, the only thing the other is good for is stabbing.

Monty: Do you want to play 20 Questions?

Edwin: Sure!

Edwin: Whats your favorite color?

Monty, laser fucking focused: Triangle. Do you like men?

Edwin: I love the term 'partners'. Are we dating? Are we robbing a bank? Are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit? Who knows

Cat king, to Esther : All right, let’s tell each other a secret about ourselves. I’m going to go first– I hate you.

Cat king: I’m a bad person, I’m a very bad person, I’m a horrible person.

The Squad:

Cat king: No you’re not, Cat king! We still love you, Cat king!

Esther : This should be illegal!

Jenny: It is.

Jenny: What scares you guys the most?

Charles: Werewolves!

Niko: Sharks.

Edwin: The unstoppable marching of time that is slowly guiding us all towards an inevitable death.

Monty:

Monty: Edwin.

Charles: What do you think Cat king will do for a distraction?

Edwin: They'll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That's what I would do.

*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*

Edwin: ...or they could do that.

Charles: Pfft, you should meet Niko, they're such a tsundere.

Monty: They... they just stabbed you.

Charles: So cute.

Cat king: All in all, a 100% successful trip.

Niko: But we lost Esther .

Cat king: All in all, a 100% successful trip!

*Cat king falls over*

Monty: Cat king! Are you alright?

Cat king: Is that you, God?

Monty: What?

Cat king: It's just, you sound a lot more like Monty than I expected.

[criminalmindswhore]

Computer Whiz

Agent Emily Prentiss, a dedicated FBI agent known for her tenacity and precision, finds herself in a whirlwind of danger and emotion when her latest investigation collides with her personal life.

TW: angst, computer crimes, mention of pedophiles

There was only one person whom Emily truly felt safe with and that was her girlfriend Y/n. Y/n was a ray of sunshine and love in her life and coming home to you after a dark case made her days easier. You were always there to welcome her home with a tight hug, a cheek kiss, and a whispered, "I missed you, sweet girl." You worked from home most of the time so her crazy schedule wasn't an issue.

You were a computer analyst for the Department of Defense, you were up there with Penelope when it came to computers and technology. You could hack into chatroom, computer, phone, blog, anything. You had an office in your shared apartment with 3 monitors and a setup that would make any tech nerd drool.

You were working away at your desk on cracking open a chatroom for an underground weapons ring when Emily came in the door, "Y/n, I'm home love." You didn't answer so she assumed you were focused, she was right. As she turned the corner into your office the sight in front of her made her feel weak in the knees. You were sitting in your chair with one leg pulled up under your other leg. You were wearing her FBI hoodie, leggings, and the banana socks she bought you as a gag gift. The messy bug on top of your head made it apparent to her that you have been here for a while. "Hi, love." You could hear the dopey-ass smile in her voice.

Finally stopping your work you turned your chair around to face her, "Hi beautiful girl." She walked over to you before leaning down to give you the sweetest kiss you've ever had, the kind of kiss that makes your head spin around. She cupped your face with her hands before pulling away. She held your face and just looked at you like she was trying to memorize every millimeter of you. Your eyes just watched her eyes as they slowly scanned your face. "Do you want to run and grab our dinner while I finish?" She frowned, "I was hoping you would let me watch you again. It's fun watching you work." How could you ever say no to her, she had this look in her eyes that drove you crazy and she knew it. "Fine, but you can't profile the case." You pointed a finger at her as she pulled up a chair beside yours.

"Fuck yes, I'm in." Your finger kept moving furiously, "I need to download all of this now before I get kicked out." A ding came from your computer and you threw your hands in the air. "New record bitches. They really need to learn it only takes me 3 seconds to get everything." Emily just stared at you in awe, there were about 50 different codes and buttons pushed in those 3 seconds. "I will never understand how you and Penelope do that." She chuckled at herself and you beamed at her. "Dinner?" She nodded and stood up pulling you from your chair. She wrapped her arms around your waist fingers gripping your hips. She leaned in close and whispered in your ear, "I think I know what I want to eat now." Your breath hitched and you craned your neck to expose it to her, she took the bait and started leaving sloppy kisses down your neck.

The next week, Emily was sitting at her desk trying to find a single clue in her case. A computer whiz was hacking into pedophile chatrooms and finding their addresses. This person was then hiring hitmen to take them out. Looking at the messages sent to the hitmen trying to find something, anything. There was a soft knock on her door, Penelope timidly stuck her head in, "Em we have an issue." She sat in a chair in front of her desk, file in hand. Prentiss set down her pen immediately noticing how serious Pen looked, "What's going on Garcia?" Penelope swallowed hard and handed the file to Emily. "Y/n is our unsub." Emily threw open the file looking for a way for it to not be true. "I was trying to find the IP address of the person contacting the hitmen, which was difficult because she was using a device to bounce her IP around every 20 seconds. However, I was able to get through the device and it pinged in your apartment for almost a minute. Unless it's just a coincidence, she is our unsub." Penelope looked up at Emily from her heels, Emily had a single tear on her cheek. The map showed so clearly apartment 3B, the most left corner where your office is. Emily's heart felt like it was going to beat out of her chest, this could not be happening.

"No no no no." You kept repeating the word no like a mantra. The alert on your computer still going off, letting you know that Garcia broke your security system. "Fuck!" You had 20 minutes tops to get the fuck out of there. You threw your most important items in a bag and opened up your computer to a Word document. Hands shaky and teary you typed out a letter for your Emily, you knew her heart was broken by now. The letter was full of apologies for breaking her trust, for letting her love you, for running away. As you booked it towards the door of your apartment you stopped for a moment looking at the picture of you and Emily above the kitchen doorway. She had her head thrown back laughing as you were telling a story to JJ. Both of your smiles were wide, eyes sparkling with love. Rossi can be seen in the background smiling at the two of you. You took the photo off the wall and shoved it into your bag. As the apartment door shut behind you, you were officially on the run. Feet heavy, palms sweaty. You could hear the sirens coming towards the building, you got into the second car you had without Emily knowing and slinked out of the parking lot.

It wasn't long before you were caught and thrown into the back of an SUV. Alvez didn't say a word outside of your Miranda Rights the entire ride to Quantico where you knew Emily was waiting. As the doors to the elevator opened she stood there. Arms crossed around her chest, eyes visibly puffy and red. She stared into you with an anger you had never seen before, how could you? Emily's head was going a million miles a minute trying to find a way for you to not be responsible. As Alvez walked down the hall to the interrogation room you saw Emily holding a printout of the letter you wrote to her. Luke didn't bother cuffing your hands to the table, you wouldn't hurt any of them, you wouldn't even think about it.

You could feel Emily's eyes on you from the other side of the glass. You could guess exactly where her head is at, questioning every part of your relationship, looking for signs. She wouldn't find any, she never had any reason to believe this was going on. Emily stared at the guilt so apparent on your face. She knew you truly believed you would never get caught, you are the smartest person she knows. There was a lot of hurt circling her mind. Not only did you do this, but you hid it so well from her. She trusts you more than anyone on this planet, more than she trusts herself, and you hid this.

Emily took a deep breath in and then entered the room. Your eyes shot from your hands to her face, trying to read her. She sat at the other side of the table, hands in her lap, file on the table. "Y/n, why?" You could hear the broken trust in her voice, "I don't truly know. It started with me trying to find them for a case and once I realized how easy it was, I lost control." Your anger was rising, "How could I just live my life knowing these fucked up men hurt children. Children Emily. I couldn't." Your hands were shaking, and her mind was racing. "It's not your job to serve justice, your job was to find them." Her voice was quiet but strong. You swallowed the lump in your throat, "I know that." There was a tension so thick in the air. "I have to send you away Y/n. You put me in this position. I also now have to move. I have to pack your things and move from that apartment." Emily's voice was getting louder and angrier. She laid her hands on the table, and you noticed how her cuticles were bleeding, she was picking at her nails. You felt so guilty for making her start doing that again. "You have broken all trust you created with me, this family. I will forever love Y/n, but not the person sitting across the table from me." Her eyes finally met yours, "I'm sorry Emily." Her hand slammed on the table, and you jumped, "Don't say my name." She stood up and left, leaving the file behind.

You opened it. There were images of the men YOU killed. You didn't know how they were killed, just that they were dead. Your stomach cramped, your cheeks got hot and you slammed it shut. Luke came in to take you to arraignment. Emily watched from the bullpen, still grasping the letter in her hand. She watched you mouth 'I love you' as the elevator doors closed. She watched as Alvez stared at you in disgust, your best friend.

Emily entered her office and closed the blinds. She closed the door and sat down chewing at her thumb. She laid the letter down and began reading it for the 34th time since Garcia gave it to her.

'My love, I'm sure by now I've already been arrested. I can't explain why I did this or how it happened. You know how I am with crimes against kids. KIDS. I will never be able to erase the damage I have created. I made a promise to you that I wouldn't hurt you like your parents or JJ did, but I did worse. I did more damage than they ever could. I'm sure this is your worst nightmare.

I will hold onto the memories you allowed me to create with you, like when we went to Key West and sweat so much we lost weight. I'll hold onto the way your hands fit in mine, how your lips perfectly fit mine. I'll hold onto the way you giggled when you saw me after a case, how you would press a kiss to my cheek and say that you're okay before I had to ask.

You learned me and my brain so fast and well. I swear you knew me better than I did until this all started. I cannot apologize enough for the mess I've created. Not just for you but for your team. Spencer loved my hugs which says a lot. Luke is my best friend. Penelope, sweet loving Penelope. I can't imagine the hurt and pain they are feeling. I'm so sorry to all of you.

I hope you can move on. I can't say I'm sorry enough Em.

-the girl you knew, Y/n"

A drop of blood fell onto the paper, Emily snapped her eyes to her thumb. "Fuck." A tear fell from her eye. She can't wrap her head around this at all, but she'll have to learn. She took the ring off her hand, the promise ring you gave her, she slipped it into her desk drawer.

[tiny-sassy-aggressive]

I am living blogging my reaction to the second watch through of WDAPTEO 4 bc the first run through was so much

00:00- I screamed when I saw the notif. I was alone in the car. Just pulled up to my apt looked at my phone and screamed “ no way “ I still can’t believe we got it

00:01- hi, they are SO BEAUTIFUL I’m squealing. I cannot stop staring it’s embarassing

00:27 what’s going on here? “Nothing” my heart. The smiles

00:50 oh I am LOVING the feature wall. And fish tank reveal project??

01:00 how dare they throw THAT japhan photo up there like it’s just some example. Who the hell do they think they are- also I want that doomed hoodie :( he is snug as a bug in a rug

01:50 terror not even 2 minute in and crack

02:03 I’m sorry Dan asking Phil about TikTok stuff is precious

02:13(What is cba)

02:39 I CACKLED. Phil’s sarcastic ass omg

02:44 dans little pat

02:58 phivorce

03:05 I know the ft, they are friends of course. But seeing the messages really warms my heart. Like it’s so normal why am I emotional

03:52 of course Phil sends millions of memes

04:10 how in the fuck did Phil catch his phone what??? Ft dans face during the whole interaction.

Ad time —— 04:25. Im sorry Dan looks fucking amazing, his hair is so curled and pretty? And he looks so comfy cozy and soft??? My Dannie side is really coming out rn

04:59 handsome devil, damn straight. Love this man he’s too precious for this world

05:23 🍑

05:55 are the Brits okay??? Bone daddies?? I’m too American for this

06:30 perfectly encapsulated Dan and Phil energy

06:35 Dan saying dude scratches a weird itch in my brain

06:55 again! Totally normal to call a friend in a taxi. But this moment makes them so real in my mind like yes. Call that friend. In that taxi. Make it less awkward. Why did I like this moment so much

07:05 A PRETEND CONVO OF COURSE HE WOULD. He’s so real for that

07:34 “these are very dan and Phil”

07:42 I’m in pain. Koala content and ouch I can’t even put into words

08:44 three days without a text sounds exaggerated. Or lie. Like cmon. All those messages and convos and yall went 3 days without a word?? Sounds fake

08:58 asking what he should do for his nails!!? Again totally normal but UGH I love their friendship

09:01 also Phil coming in with a STELLAR idea, hope to see it happen

09:11 Phil’s a little shit OMG he hated the nails Dan got.

09:38: dans precious little selfies

09:44 also who tf is that that does not look like Dan

09:52 wtf do you mean that they had the same weird Swedish bakery???? 10 years apart???? WHAT THE HELL??????

10:35 fuckin nerds ft cute ft selfie

10:52 Dan in Phil’s glasses hi what the fuck? Precious. Phil loves to take photos of Dan sleeping.

11:02 jump. Scare.

11:28 PHIL CALLED HIS MOM. NURSE LESTER.

12:11 Dan stalking the ring doorbell is not something I expected?

12:20 glad to know Phil and I share that we can’t hear someone saw our name bc it’s too intimate

13:16 ordering a roast dinner is so cute idk why

13:35 jump. Scare.

14:26 I hate them :( i so long for what they have

15:04 they didn’t see death note the musical!! Haters!!!!

15:20 HOT

16:00 Phil papping Dan>>>>>>

16:20 I rewatched this part so many times. Thsi entire sequence. This whole. Dare i say SCENE. Disgustingly familiar. Disgustingly cute. I- karaoke game???? What??? It was for them

17:06 omatone :(

18:22 hot? Worrying? Hmm???

18:45 Phil is so dramatic I love him

19:01 genre to dinner? I don’t get them

19:10 DAAAAAN AHHHHH

19:20 SCRIPTS AH???????3@2/9/@/9@22929 more writer Dan

20:17 this is so familiar

20:50 this has “would you still love me if I was a worm” energy? Can’t explain

22:53 “we dan and phil-ed it” we have to steal that! Asap’

23:24 when Dan sits up he is soooo much taller than Phil but he constantly slumps down and looks up to Phil. It’s very cute to watch.

24:30 oh they are fully embracing the joint channel and slowly moving away from gaming and honestly. I’m alright with it. They look so happy

Guys this was too much. So I just started reading fanfic and these conversations were right out of what I’ve been reading which is very odd tbh? But we were fed. This was amazing content and I can’t wait to see what the writers do with this. Cheers

[fool-counter]

September first, 1989, dear diary...

I believe I'm a good person

You know, I think there's good in everyone, but here we are first day of senior year

I look around at these kids I've known all my life and

I ask myself: What happened?

(Freak! Slut! Burnout! Bug-Eyes! Poser! Lard Ass!)

We were so tiny, happy and shiny, playing tag and getting chased

(Freak! Slut! Loser! Sh—s!)

Singing and clapping

Laughing and napping

Baking cookies, eating paste

(Bull-d—! Stuck-up! Hunchback!)

Then we got bigger

That was the trigger

Like the Huns invading Rome

Sorry!

Welcome to my school

This ain't no high school

This is the Thunderdome

Hold your breath

And count the days

We're graduating soon

(White trash!)

College will be paradise

If I'm not dead by June!

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray for a better way

If we changed back then

We could change again

We can be beautiful

Ow!

Just not today

Hey, are you okay?

Get away, nerd

(Freak! Slut! Cr—le! Homo! Homo! Homo!)

Things will get better

Soon as my letter

Comes from Yale, or Duke, or Brown

Awake from this coma

Take my diploma

Then I can blow this town

Dream of ivy-covered walls

And smoky French cafes

(Watch it!)

Fight the urge to strike a match and send this dump ablaze!

Ooops

Ram Sweeney, third year as linebacker

And eighth year of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick!

What did you say to me skank?

Aaah, nothing!

But I know, I know, I know

Life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray

For a better way

We were kind before

We can be kind once more

We can be beautiful

Ah! Hey Martha

Hey

Martha Dumpstock

My best friend since diapers

Are we on for movie night?

Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail

I rented The Princess Bride

Hohoho, again? Wait, don't you have it memorized right now?

What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending

Martha Dumptruck! Wide load!

Kurt Kelly, quarterback, will receive a full scholarship from the University of "dude let's get wasted and light our farts on fire" he is the smartest guy on the football team

Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf

Hey! Pick that up right now!

I'm sorry, are you actually talking to me?

Yes, I am, I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on my friend?

You're a high school has-been waiting to happen, a future gas station attendant

You got a zit right there

Dear Diary

(Why~)

Why do they hate me?

Why don't I fight back?

Why do I act like such a creep?

(Why~)

Why won't he date me?

Why did I hit him?

Why do I cry myself to sleep?

(Why~!)

Students

Somebody hug me!

Somebody fix me!

Somebody save me!

Send me a sign, God!

Give me some hope here!

Something to live for!

Ah! Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And then there's the Heathers, they float above it all

I love Heather, Heather, and Heather

Heather McNamara, head cheerleader, her dad is loaded, he sells engagement rings

I hate Heather, Heather, and Heather!

Heather Duke, runs the yearbook, no discernible personality,

But her mom did pay for implants

I want Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And Heather Chandler, the almighty

She is a mythic bitch

They are solid Teflon

Never bothered, never harassed

I would give anything to be like that

I'd like to be their boyfriend

That would be beautiful!

If I sat at their table, guys would notice me

So beautiful!

I'd like them to be nicer

That would be beautiful!

I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse

And leave her tied up for the rats!

....That's not so beautiful!

Grow up, Heather, bulimia is so '87

Maybe you should see a doctor, Heather

Yeah, Heather, maybe I should

Ah, Heather and Heather and Heather

Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting

You're late for class

Heather wasn't feeling well, we're helping her

Not without a hall pass you're not. Week's detention

Actually, Miss Fleming, all four of us are out on a hall pass

Yearbook committee

I see you're all listed

Hurry up and get where you're going

This is an excellent forgery

Who are you?

Veronica Sawyer

I crave a boon

What boon?

Hm, let me sit at your table at lunch

Just once

No talking necessary

If people think you guys tolerate me, they'll leave me alone

Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips and absence notes

How about prescriptions?

Shut up, Heather

Yeah! Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast, Heather?

Sorry, Heather

For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure

And a symmetrical face

If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull I'd have matching halves

That's very important

Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds

And you know, you know, you know?

This could be beautiful

Mascara, maybe some lip gloss

And we're on our way

Get this girl some blush

And Heather, I need your brush

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Make her beautiful

Okay?

Okay!

Out of my way geek!

I don't want trouble

You're gonna die at 3PM!

Don't you dare touch me! Get away, pervert!

What'd I ever do to them?

Who could survive this?

I can't escape this!

I think I'm dying!

Who's that with Heather?

Whoa. Heather, Heather, Heather

And someone!

Heather, Heather, Heather

And a babe!

Heather, Heather, Heather

Veronica?!

Veronica, Veronica, Veronica

And you know

You know, you know

Life can be beautiful

You hope, you dream, you pray

And you get your way!

Ask me how it feels

Wearin' these rad ass heels!

My God, it's beautiful!

I might be beautiful

And when you're beautiful

It's a beautiful frickin' day!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!

September first, 1989, dear diary...

I believe I'm a good person

You know, I think there's good in everyone, but here we are first day of senior year

I look around at these kids I've known all my life and

I ask myself: What happened?

(Freak! Slut! Burnout! Bug-Eyes! Poser! Lard Ass!)

We were so tiny, happy and shiny, playing tag and getting chased

(Freak! Slut! Loser! Sh—s!)

Singing and clapping

Laughing and napping

Baking cookies, eating paste

(Bull-d—! Stuck-up! Hunchback!)

Then we got bigger

That was the trigger

Like the Huns invading Rome

Sorry!

Welcome to my school

This ain't no high school

This is the Thunderdome

Hold your breath

And count the days

We're graduating soon

(White trash!)

College will be paradise

If I'm not dead by June!

But I know, I know, life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray for a better way

If we changed back then

We could change again

We can be beautiful

Ow!

Just not today

Hey, are you okay?

Get away, nerd

(Freak! Slut! Cr—le! Homo! Homo! Homo!)

Things will get better

Soon as my letter

Comes from Yale, or Duke, or Brown

Awake from this coma

Take my diploma

Then I can blow this town

Dream of ivy-covered walls

And smoky French cafes

(Watch it!)

Fight the urge to strike a match and send this dump ablaze!

Ooops

Ram Sweeney, third year as linebacker

And eighth year of smacking lunch trays and being a huge dick!

What did you say to me skank?

Aaah, nothing!

But I know, I know, I know

Life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray

For a better way

We were kind before

We can be kind once more

We can be beautiful

Ah! Hey Martha

Hey

Martha Dumpstock

My best friend since diapers

Are we on for movie night?

Yeah, you're on Jiffy Pop detail

I rented The Princess Bride

Hohoho, again? Wait, don't you have it memorized right now?

What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending

Martha Dumptruck! Wide load!

Kurt Kelly, quarterback, will receive a full scholarship from the University of "dude let's get wasted and light our farts on fire" he is the smartest guy on the football team

Which is kind of like being the tallest dwarf

Hey! Pick that up right now!

I'm sorry, are you actually talking to me?

Yes, I am, I wanna know what gives you the right to pick on my friend?

You're a high school has-been waiting to happen, a future gas station attendant

You got a zit right there

Dear Diary

(Why~)

Why do they hate me?

Why don't I fight back?

Why do I act like such a creep?

(Why~)

Why won't he date me?

Why did I hit him?

Why do I cry myself to sleep?

(Why~!)

Students

Somebody hug me!

Somebody fix me!

Somebody save me!

Send me a sign, God!

Give me some hope here!

Something to live for!

Ah! Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And then there's the Heathers, they float above it all

I love Heather, Heather, and Heather

Heather McNamara, head cheerleader, her dad is loaded, he sells engagement rings

I hate Heather, Heather, and Heather!

Heather Duke, runs the yearbook, no discernible personality,

But her mom did pay for implants

I want Heather, Heather, and Heather!

And Heather Chandler, the almighty

She is a mythic bitch

They are solid Teflon

Never bothered, never harassed

I would give anything to be like that

I'd like to be their boyfriend

That would be beautiful!

If I sat at their table, guys would notice me

So beautiful!

I'd like them to be nicer

That would be beautiful!

I'd like to kidnap a Heather and photograph her naked in an abandoned warehouse

And leave her tied up for the rats!

....That's not so beautiful!

Grow up, Heather, bulimia is so '87

Maybe you should see a doctor, Heather

Yeah, Heather, maybe I should

Ah, Heather and Heather and Heather

Perhaps you didn't hear the bell over all the vomiting

You're late for class

Heather wasn't feeling well, we're helping her

Not without a hall pass you're not. Week's detention

Actually, Miss Fleming, all four of us are out on a hall pass

Yearbook committee

I see you're all listed

Hurry up and get where you're going

This is an excellent forgery

Who are you?

Veronica Sawyer

I crave a boon

What boon?

Hm, let me sit at your table at lunch

Just once

No talking necessary

If people think you guys tolerate me, they'll leave me alone

Before you answer, I also do report cards, permission slips and absence notes

How about prescriptions?

Shut up, Heather

Yeah! Did you have a brain tumor for breakfast, Heather?

Sorry, Heather

For a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure

And a symmetrical face

If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull I'd have matching halves

That's very important

Of course, you could stand to lose a few pounds

And you know, you know, you know?

This could be beautiful

Mascara, maybe some lip gloss

And we're on our way

Get this girl some blush

And Heather, I need your brush

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Let's make her beautiful

Make her beautiful

Okay?

Okay!

Out of my way geek!

I don't want trouble

You're gonna die at 3PM!

Don't you dare touch me! Get away, pervert!

What'd I ever do to them?

Who could survive this?

I can't escape this!

I think I'm dying!

Who's that with Heather?

Whoa. Heather, Heather, Heather

And someone!

Heather, Heather, Heather

And a babe!

Heather, Heather, Heather

Veronica?!

Veronica, Veronica, Veronica

And you know

You know, you know

Life can be beautiful

You hope, you dream, you pray

And you get your way!

Ask me how it feels

Wearin' these rad ass heels!

My God, it's beautiful!

I might be beautiful

And when you're beautiful

It's a beautiful frickin' day!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica!

Heather! Heather! Heather! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica! Veronica!

fool count: 36

beautiful... beautifool... it all starts to blend together after a while...

[multifandombullshitbabes]

Random Merlin Rewatch: Where a random number generator gives me a season and an episode from BBC Merlin; and then I comment on it as I go.

Today's episode: Season 1 Episode 6 - A Remedy to Cure all Ills

Before I start, let me just say, I'm really happy I'm getting to rewatch the earlier seasons. Of course the next random episode might be literally season 5 or something, but it's great that it hasn't happened yet.

Let's fucking start bitches

Not the wiggly evil fingers just a few seconds in.

Damn boy you got some dirty ass nails, wash your hands.

MORGWEN MY BELOVEDS!!!! Also the way Gwen looked at Morgana after she asked who'd she want the flowers to be from. Girl looked ready to risk it ALL, let me put a screenshot actually.

OUGHHHH the brainrot is real with these two

LIKE??????? GWEN'S THIRSTY (me too)

Alright girls, enough yearning please

Ugh, I hate the little sound the bug made when it dropped from the flower. Butthole clenched in digust.

Oh thank god they DON'T show it literally entering her ear. That would've been so gross.

LETS GO INTROOOOOO

Oh Gwen looks BEAUTIFUL in that yellow color. It does everything for her!!

"She's all but dead, Merlin." JESUS FUCKING CHRIST GAIUS

Most suspicious ruse of all time. "Oh, i have a cure for all ills. And also I know the king's ward is very sick. But anyways, I'll be at the inn :)." Bitch.

"But I'm not worried." me when I lie. Merlin is so bad at lying, jesus fuck

Merlin sits down to stop pacing. Arthur gets up and starts pacing. Two sides of the same coin or whatever.

Underrated Arthur shirt is the purplish one he wears in the scene where he begs Uther n Gaius to hear the strange man out. That color looks good on him. It might be his red shirt but in a weird lighting?? I can't be sure.

I really like when Gaius gets to talk all medical considering how limited the medicine world was at the time. It's really really cool, I love seeing this insight into what was possibly like to be a physician at the time. I don't of this happens much in the show.

Arthur really is so trusting when it comes to his loved ones. Of course he's not at fault, like he said what do they have to lose at this point, honestly I've done the same. It's just. Heartbreaking to notice that trait knowing what comes next.

"Science is knowledge." Merlin is such a nerd, I love him.

Oh, not Gaius and Edwin having a lying competition over here. There's a better term for it, but whatever.

Gwen is SO FUCKING GORGEOUS but girl please that's a fucking sorcerer, go AWAY be SAFE. She's so smart though. Immediately knew something was off. He tries to be all "She may die :(." to get her to be worried and not suspicious, but it literally doesn't work. She leaves the room but not because she thinks he's got Morgana's best interests at heart. She knows something is wrong. She also knows she holds no power. And on the chance that he is right and Morgana dies, she'd never forgive herself.

The fucking lying back and forth between Gaius and Edwin. Like. From the outside, it sounds like a perfectly normal convo. But they both know it isn't. And WE know it isn't 'cause we know Edwin's full of shit.

Interesting how Arthur isn't seated but Uther and Morgana are.

Who the fuck knocks on someone's door, doesn't hear an answer, and then just let's themselves in?? I'm sorry, if you're a stranger, I'm not doing that. The fuck's wrong with you Merlin, you nosy boy??

It is so sickening that these villains of the week have views that we can agree with. Yes, magic is a gift and can be a force for good, you're right! But it's because of Uther and his oppression that they turn bitter and ruthless and vindictive. And yes, you do have to eliminate those who are like Uther because they will only propagate the same corrupted and repressive beliefs. The problem, the layers, is that some of those people are actually very much capable of understanding the very fundamental logic that "Sorcerers deserve too live in freedom" but they're so filled with fear and propaganda of the contrary that it's so hard to get out of it. And that's why, if they killed Uther with magic, Arthur would hate magic even more (just like it happens in canon), which would then just repeat the cycle, etc etc. You need to uproot the system, but killing everybody is not the answer; but also having to teach such a fundamental thing, that certain humans deserve basic rights, is such a painful thing to teach, and the oppressed does not have the obligation to do so. But then the cycle just repeats and repeats and it's SHIT. Anyways.

It's so funny that in season 1 they hadn't figured out the cgi for the golden eyes so they just. simply don't show it.

The things Edwin say are like. Well-meaning. But there's just this off vibe that the most intelligent characters (Gaius, Gwen, Merlin) can just. pick up. And even though Merlin really likes what Edwin is saying, there's just something telling him... it's wrong.

Uther, of course, would never even believe anyone would just lie so blatantly and manipulate him like this because he thinks himself very intelligent; which is why he's falling for everythinggg that Edwin says. But, credit where credit's due, Edwin is an excellent liar.

Gaius wears the most cunty ring on his pinky finger, hello?

I want that ring bro.

Oop, not Gaius having his cowardice and betrayal shoved right in his face. I get it, you wanted safety. But there's consequences to your actions. And I know Gaius feels so guilty about all his friends that died at the stake while he remained safe and sound.

If Gaius would've left in this episode, replaced by Edwin, I bet Morgana would've felt so guilty. In her mind, her illness is what caused him to leave. Gaius truly was there for Morgana and Arthur in ways Uther simply could not.

OOP Gaius and Kilgarrah meeting!!!!!!!! I forgot this happened lmao

Gaius got a little taste of how infuriating the dragon is.

Wait, Gaius was employed for Arthur's birth? That's so interesting. He probably already lived in Camelot but he's been a court physician for 20 years. He was already quite old by then.

It's the way that Gaius is just. Ready to throw his whole life away to make sure Merlin is safe and sound. That's his fucking son, bro!!!

What the actual fuck, they're gonna make me cry :(((( Gaius called Merlin a blessing and his son, I can't.

THEY CAN'T DO THIS TO MEEEEEEE IM GONNA CRY

Gwen is so iconic, speak the fucking truth girl.

THAT ICONIC GWEN LINE YESSSSSSSSSS QUEENNNN

Not Gaius with his lil blanket and lil fire. He looks so smol, it's so funny.

Edwin could've waited a lil bit before going all murder on Uther. That just looks suspicious as fuck ngl.

GAIUS GETTING BLOWN BACK SHOULD'NT BE SO FUNNY BUT--

I wonder how Arthur knew that his father was ill. It means he went into his room, but why? Did he have some feeling about Edwin? About Gaius leaving? Was it some courtly concern? I'm assuming no one else would have the privilege of seeing Uther at night except for his son and ward so.

Yes, Merlin, just stare at the floating axe that's being controlled by the evil sorcerer right in front of you, you're so smart. Also the slow-mo is so goofy.

It's interesting that they shot both Merlin and Edwin's eyes up-close when they did magic, Merlin to do the golden eye effect, but for Edwin it seems that his pupils just change size. I wonder if not all sorcerers have their eyes glow, if it depends on the magic. Edwin is using dark magic, could it be that? That's interesting, imo. Dark magic equals no golden eyes. Kinda fun.

Violent ass death for Edwin, damn. Axe to head, bitchass

Oh it must be so weird for Merlin to be touching Uther like that. Like that's intimate as shit.

So cuteeee Gaius calling Merlin a genius, they're adorable. He's so proud. That was a feat, though, just pure improv and luck. Merlin is still a noob at controlled magic so this was really damn good.

Love that it's so canon that Gaius potions taste like fucking ASS. Uther's face, lmao.

Interesting that Uther asked if Gaius remembered his friends that burned at the pyre, and Gaius answers "All of them." and Uther doesn't even comment. As bonkers as it sounds, they truly are friends in some capacities. I wonder if Gaius could make Uther change his mind. Not Morgana or Arthur, but Gaius. But he made the choice to abandon magic, Uther presumed because Gaius understood its dangers, but if he were to find out that actually Gaius doesn't agree, I wonder what Uther would think about that. Like a genuine and open convo about it. I think he'd just arrest Gaius for it, but I don't know. I think there's at least some reality where he gives it some more thought. But I don't know if he'd ever repel the ban, more because he'd have to admit that he was wrong, and admitting you're wrong is also accepting and processing all the shit you did for that wrong thing, and I just think Uther is too cowardly to do so. He knows it would break his mind to truly process all the pain and horror he's caused; so no matter his inner philosophies, he'll never repel the ban, because the damage has been done, and he'd rather live like that than start anew in the new reality where he's wrong.

"In the fight against magic, you are the one person I can trust." yet again. Gaius going against this? Uther can't fathom it. He's so confident that Gaius is 100% on his side.

Arthur smiling at Gaius, awww.

Two pretty bestfriends. No wonder half the kingdom wants to fuck them both. Also what the fuck is a "freeman"??? Genuinely, what is it??

And that is it. Loved it, of course.