#neitherrherenorthere

[neitherrherenorthere]

you said you’d be there to catch me next time i fall

so where the hell are you now

[neitherrherenorthere]

i hate how everything has changed

i dont feel like me

its like i went to bed one day, woke up, and everything was different

the world feels off

and i feel like im losing all my memories

[neitherrherenorthere]

you said that i was your girl and you’ll love me til the end of time

oh how i wish i knew what i did wrong to make you change up your whole mind

[neitherrherenorthere]

you could break my heart into a million pieces

and i would glue all the pieces together and hand it right back to you

[neitherrherenorthere]

i dont know why all i think about is you

when you could care less

when all you wanted was to undress me

see the intimate parts of myself

that you didn’t deserve to see

i thought i needed you

but then i had you

and i hated it

i hated you

i didn’t need you

i didn’t need anyone

so instead of running like you always do

i ran and didn’t look back

and now you’re left missing someone you didn’t even have

and im missing someone that never existed

[neitherrherenorthere]

i met someone new

but im still wishing it was you

[neitherrherenorthere]

i hate that you turned out to be like everyone else

because for a second i actually thought you were different

[neitherrherenorthere]

i think you might have been more broken than me

had someone who would give you the world

and you let her go

[neitherrherenorthere]

maybe we could never get the timing right

or maybe we were just never meant to be

and if that’s the case

i hope multiple universes are real

and i hope we made it work in at least one of them

because the truth is

i love you

[neitherrherenorthere]

the sun hasn’t felt warm

ever since you left

[neitherrherenorthere]

you told me you loved me

and maybe you did

just not in the way i wanted you to

[neitherrherenorthere]

i wonder if you still think about me

i wonder if your heart aches whenever you remember how my lips felt

pressed against your skin

because i remember when you said you never wanted to lose me

how i was the only one who understood you

how no matter what we went through you wanted me there

right next to you

but now we’re a few hundred miles away from each other

back to strangers

like we never really ever met

i feel like im in another universe without you here

because i can’t remember who i was before you walked into my life

and now im so lost trying to find who i really am

[neitherrherenorthere]

the act of meeting someone new

sharing intimate parts of yourself

all for them to never reply again

is something my heart cannot handle anymore

[neitherrherenorthere]

its not fair

that you washed up on shore

while im drowning in a tidal wave

[neitherrherenorthere]

we often go years without talking

and for the first time its really bothered me that we haven’t talked in months

i miss you

things didn’t go well the last time we talked

they never do

but yet i still find myself wondering how you are

its eating me alive

knowing that you will never escape my brain

you’re like a parasite

and im your perfect host

but even with a possible cure

i’ll still let you kill me from the inside

[neitherrherenorthere]

its been getting hard to do much of anything

i don’t know how much time i have left

they say everything is temporary

but this feeling feels permanent

they say keep trying it gets better

but im having a hard time figuring out when it will