#neil just has surprised pikachu face after that

[fortheloveofexy]

The whole dinner feels like torture but then she drops that bomb while he’s sitting right next to her (that they’re let out of the deal) and Neil breaks facade to say ‘seriously?’. And they all expect that to go badly but Allison just says ‘I asked’ in a very casual way that no one but her feels comforted by. They all do a very good job of acting like they aren’t completely terrified for the rest of the time he is there but they have so many questions. And concerns. After, Kevin not so discreetly excuses himself to call Jean

I'm dying at Allison throwing "I asked" back in Neil's face like he hasn't said that a thousand times before when explaining how he convinces Andrew to do things... god

When she and Ichirou are in the car on the way home, Allison is all smug and happy bc it actually went reasonably well, all things considered.

[ollisdead]

so- i'm basically going to be doing an absolute *crack* drabble/headcanon-ish thing based off of the above post that is reblogged to my page so- yeah.

so the foxes are on one of their chaotic grocery trips, which is ten times more chaotic when they go to target, which they did.

so andrew is in his usual spot in the cart with renee pushing and the rest of the foxes chaotically suggesting things and following them.

and it is canon that andrew has a massive sweet tooth while neil really doesn't, but always argues with kevin (his exy bestie ; )) ((and wins)) about letting andrew get candy (((because that boy is gone)))

now, let's for a very unrealistic moment (i did warn you that this was gonna be crack) that the millport cheer squad had stuck together. OR more realistically, they got together for a reunion or something.

yeah, actually, that makes more sense let's go with that.

okay so because the cheerleaders didn't go into cheerleading after highschool, or if they did it was for a different sport or a school that doesn't play exy, or isn't big on it, they don't really follow exy, never really cared for it that much.

(and let's be honest that probably played a part in neils 'beef' with them)

and there is a comment in the original post, about one of the cheerleaders asking neil out and him saying no, so then they hated him, but i like to think that in this crack world, neil is even more of a petty bitch, and the cheerleaders were just as much, if not more so. and also it's funnier if its something stupid and petty.

sO- imagine the foxes in target, surrounded by this chaotic energy, when suddenly this girl's voice just carries across the isle: 'oh my god... neil josten is that really you?'

cue the most dramatic turn in the history of dramatic turns with neil having a horrified face before he says 'stella' (yes ik i'm unoriginal leave me tf alone) in a really dramatic voice.

and no, stella and the rest of the cheerleaders aren't disgusted or freaked out by his scars and new look, because i like to think that not all cheerleaders are dumb, shallow blonde bitches like all those cliches and movies say say : ( (and i mean come on, give them some respect cheerleading is fucking hard) ((i would know, i did cheer camp for a summer a couple years back and i was *dead*))

(they may be a little surprised but anyone would be)

bUt aNyWaY-

the cheeleaders get into one of those cliche mean girls formation, just because

stella: 'so we meet again'

neil: unfortunately

stella: yeah, i'm not exactly sunshine and rainbows over here either, hun

and the cheerleaders just hijack their shopping trip with the foxes having shocked pikachu face the entire time, and the entire time the cheerleaders and neil bicker like the petty bitches they are

but they exchange numbers and have one chaotic gc and they are the ones that convinced neil to finally get an iphone because the green text is 'f-ing annoying'

but andreil still keeps the old phones for sentimental reasons

and they got engaged when andrew threw a ring at neil and said 'yes or no?' and neil said the real important 'yEs'

and the cheerleaders are invited to neil and andrews wedding (i don't fucking care what nora says, they had a wedding and got married)

FUCK MY ADD

[percontaion-points]

Raven King chapter 7

Click to see the rest of the snark & image descriptions.

Chapter 7

He hadn't said anything last night, maybe too tired to demand an explanation for last night's fiasco...

Look, I don't like any of these characters. But I'm also not going to sit here and let David drag Neil through the mud simply because Riko thinks that threatening to murder people is a personality trait.

"Tell me why someone who came here early to get away from his parents and who flinched away from me the first time he thought I was going to strike him goes so far out of his way to offend someone like Riko Moriyama. I would have thought you'd have better survival instincts."

He's not wrong. Considering that Neil keeps wanking off about how he has to keep his head down and survive, he sure is going out of his way to do the exact opposite. Signing to a college sportsball team, going out of his way to be around not only Kevin, but also Riko.

Neil is so fucking stupid, and I can't deal.

"You're a real piece of work, you know that?" Wymack asked, coming to rejoin him at the table. "Your parents must be something else."

Coach David: I'm going to have a team of nothing but children who are troubled. They deserve second chances.

The children: *act out because they've never had a positive influence in their lives, and don't know any better*

Coach David: *surprised pikachu face*

"I didn't know," Neil repeated. "Until Coach told me about the Moriyamas this May I knew nothing about Riko's family. After that I thought maybe that's why we met so long ago. I thought Riko's father and mine were discussing territories and borders. But last night Riko said my father belongs to the Moriyamas. What did he mean by that? Why did he say he bought me?"

"Don't lie to me," Kevin said. "We are in enough trouble as it is."

"My mother didn't tell me why we were running," Neil said. "I never asked her why she finally had enough. I was just glad to get away. We never talked about anything real after that. It was always about the weather or our current language or the local culture—the next time she had anything meaningful to say to me was when she was dying. Even then she didn't talk about my father. Not once did she mention the Moriyamas. If she had, I wouldn't be here right now, would I? So tell me the truth."

I get that Neil was a literal child when all of that happened. But after drilling into Neil's head about needing to be on the run, of needing to keep his head down... AND SHE COULDN'T EVEN BE BOTHERED TO EXPLAIN TO HIM WHY HE NEEDED TO DO THAT?!

Like Neil isn't smart, but I'm honestly blaming a lot of that about his mother failing to teach him fucking anything.

"You were a gift, another player for the master to train. You had two days to win him over: an initial scrimmage with us to show off your potential and a second scrimmage to prove you could adapt to and implement his instructions and criticisms. If afterward he decided you weren't worth his time you would be executed by your own father."

Neil swallowed hard. "How did I do?"

"Your mother wouldn't risk failure," Kevin said. "You never made it to the second practice. She disappeared with you overnight."

The heat in Neil's stomach could have been nausea or rage, but he didn't know who he was angry at. His mother had hated his fascination with Exy his entire life. She'd told him over and over he'd never touch a racquet again but she never told him why. He couldn't understand why she had never explained the totality of what they were running from.

ONE FIVE MINUTE CONVERSATION, AND THIS ENTIRE SHITTY SITUATION COULD HAVE BEEN 100% AVOIDED.

COMMUNICATION IS FOR FUCKING SQUARES.

By 'the girls' she meant her stage sisters. Dan, aka Hennessey, had gotten a fake ID back in high school so she could work as a stripper in a nearby city.

Casually mentions child sex workers like it's not a big deal.

"Listen up. There's obsession and there's dysfunction. You can't make Exy your end-all be-all. This won't last forever, okay? You'll shine bright, then you'll retire, and then what? You gonna spend the rest of your life at home alone with all your trophies?"

Somebody had to fucking say it.

Neil thought of his mother's heavy fists on his skin and her fingers knotting in his hair. She'd told him time and time again girls were dangerous.

So his mother beat him until he didn't like girls, but couldn't be bothered to do the same thing about liking exy?

He dragged his attention back to the task at hand and vowed never to listen to Nicky again.

Chapter 7 summary: Neil wakes up on David's couch. He thinks about sneaking out to avoid the confrontation he knows is coming, but decides to get it over with. He tries the old “he started it” route, but David doesn't buy it. When Neil brings up how everybody is of the opinion that Seth was killed, David calls him out on his bullshit. That Seth was a junkie, and Andrew should keep his BS conspiracies to himself.

They go to the stadium, where Neil has his conversation with Kevin. Says that he gambled on Kevin not remembering since Kevin showed no sign of acknowledgment when Kevin went with David to recruit Neil. But he goes on and says that he didn't know about how his father “belonged” to the Moriyamas, and didn't know why he and his mother went on the run. Kevin explains to Neil about how nepotism topples empires, and the head of the Moriyama family wanted for Neil to earn his keep. Wanted Neil to become another little Kevin and Riko. But Neil's mom freaked out over the thought of them murdering a literal child and took off before the guy could decide if Neil would be worth living or not. As I keep saying, it sounds like all of Neil's current shit falls back on his mother's inability to inform him of important stuff.

Kevin tells Neil to run off and continue hiding. To survive. Neil says that he's tired of being on the run constantly. Says that Andrew seems to think that the foxes constant publicity will keep the Moriyama family from murdering him. Kevin says that Neil knows too much, and that even a TV appearance won't stop them. Tells him to go. Neil refuses, and insists he's going to stay. Kevin promises to keep up their nightly practices. They briefly talk about why it is that Andrew is so obsessed with Neil, without moving the plot along.

Some time passes, and Neil tries to bury himself in practice but ignores the news. Then, because this book is hurting for plot, we get a random conversation with Dan about casual sexism and sex work. The book tries and fails to breathe life into the other background characters. There's this really unholy passage about Nicky and Neil talking about Andrew necking on a cheerleader and it's upsetting Andrew. NOBODY FUCKING CARES.

Nicky then starts to talk about how the twin's mother gave both of them up, one ended with his aunt, and the other in foster care. But none of this is new info to the readers, so... move on already. He also mentions that their aunt died, and thinks that Andrew murdered her. Neil believes this. He also off-handedly mentions about how Andrew saved him from being beaten by some homophobic assholes, but got court-ordered drug therapy as thanks.

He then spends a long time talking about Christianity and homosexuality. And it's a heavy topic for sure, but I'm not sure if this is the right book for this. Especially since this is immediately bookended with Nicky telling Neil that playing sports isn't a personality.

[writersmacchiato]

Dating Neil and Being Charlie’s Best Friend would include. . .

requested by @scribblestarsonthecuffsofurjeans​ sorry this took so long!!

you met Neil when you came to visit Charlie one weekend

of course you knew all about Charlie's school friends and Neil especially but you hadn't met any of them until now

Neil was s h o o k bc wow is even legal to be that attractive? he's smooth tho as he shakes your hand and introduces himself

"the infamous neil perry! ive heard so much about you."

"good things, i hope."

you wink and Neil feels the blush on his cheeks.

Charlie notices all of this obvi and he starts to conspire

he thinks it would be cute tbh and like his best friend from Welton dating his other best friend? he’s down with it

so Charlie’s giving you the “grand’ tour of Welton and Neil had homework to do, but found himself tagging along and getting to know you and omg did you touch his arm?? are you flirting with him?? 

Charlie isn’t so sure that he wants this to happen anymore lmao

it’s too late tho! the seed has been planted and is slowly blossoming into a crush

Neil is full on blushing when you kiss his cheek swiftly, winking at him, before Charlie drags you away with a huff

“No” - charlie

“Yes” - you

so, you have to leave and go back to school and Neil is an odd mixture of melancholy and happiness

bc?? he saw?? the most breath-taking person he’s ever seen in his entire life???

he is highkey mooning over you

his head is full of thoughts of you; hardly able to focus in class unless it’s Keatings and then he finds himself relating the poems back to you

it gets bad enough that Keating pulls him aside one day after class like ‘boi wtf is wrong w you?’

nothing sir, i’m just taken by an angel - neil

bitch that’s so cute 🥺 - keating

and Neil just gushes about you to him and he’s literally the 🥰 emoji

Keating basically tells him to stop just pining after you and do something about it, because yeah it’s nice to dream about someone but it’s even better when your dreams are reality

so then Charlie is fed up with the whole thing bro

he’s annoyed by Neil always talking about you; could they possibly like me too? do they think i’m cute,,,maybe? hahaha i’m kidding.......unless?

and he’s double annoyed because you do the same thing about Neil to him and he doesn’t want to be the middle man anymore

so he straight up tells you that Neil likes you and vice versa with Neil

AND THEN - BECAUSE AS IF THAT WASNT ENOUGH MEDDLING

Charlie secretly sets up a date (he tells Neil to meet him at a diner, he tells you to meet him at a diner - but plot twist! Charlie isn’t coming!)

so you have your first date thanks to Charlie and it’s there you both confess your feelings and get together officially

if Charlie thought that setting y’all up would stop the endless torture from his bffs then he was wrong

it’s worse now because Neil will come back from a date all starry eyed and cheeks blushing rambling about how perfect you looked and you even held hands this time oh my god

Charlie is ready to jump out a window when the first kiss happens lmao

but despite his complaints, Charlie is actually happy that you’re happy together and will never let you live it down that it was HIM who set you up

just tell him how good of a kisser Neil is and he’ll shut up quick tho

Neil is like the sweetest boyfriend ever and you always feel like a giddy fool after seeing his sweet smile

no one:

absolutely no one:

you: holy shit did you see his smile?? oh my god he’s so cute omfg

lowkey awkward dinner parties where Neil is your plus one obvi and your parents are genuinely shocked

“wait we thought you were dating Charlie?” “wait they’re not dating!?”

awkward silence as forks scrape against plates.

lowkey think Neil could possibly be the little tiniest bit insecure that you might harbor feelings for Charlie that range outside of platonic

you’ve known him for years and nothing ever happened? hm...interesting....

bUT Neil will just straight up ask you and everything will be resolved and you’ll be on your merry way :’)

sometimes Neil will crack a joke to new students and be like “this is my s/o and this is their boyfriend Charlie”

and the students are like :o

classic.

in the end you have to arm wrestle Neil to see who will have Charlie as the best man at your wedding

you: he’s gonna be my best man, he’s my bff!

Neil: but he’s my bff too!

Todd, the voice of reason: he can be...both?

you and Neil: *surprised pikachu face*

okay anyway i give this ship 10/10, i love it. the concept is so good.