#need to put him in a snow globe and shake it VIGOROUSLY

[insidiousclouds]

Sorry followers for the spam (I'm really not) I just need to chew on that old man like a rubber dog toy.

[insane4fandoms]

RRRUUAAHHHH RRRUUUAAAHHH

LETS GOOOOOOOO

ITS BEEN A LONG DAY SO IM GOAD I’M FINALLY GIVING YOU MY REACTIONS

Oh yeah, Caliban is finally getting into his feral mode, and I LOVE IT. He’s out for blood, and will rip Mad’s head off.

Snare is out here being a number one good boy, out here making flat tires and preventing a car from working, Caliban is so proud of his boy.

Just imagine Jack and Abby witnessing Mads just getting YOINKED away in a flash after he just stabbed the cabbie car, they’re just sitting there like 🧍🏾🧍🏽‍♀️ “Y’all saw that shit?” “Yeah…”

Caliban telling Ness to take the wheel while he just beats the shit out of Mads reminds me of the older cousin who whenever he drives, he would just say “yo take the wheel,” and would just pull his hands away and grab something from behind while 10 year old me would panic and clutch the wheel tightly while we’re on the highway 😭 he’s a good cousin tho lmao don’t think about it too much.

Caliban do be a bully to Mads lmao, but aren’t we all? He’s my scrungly man that I like to put in a snow globe and shake around vigorously.

Not Caliban straight up biting Mads 😨 bro got them shark teeth and WILL give you an infection, human saliva is legit considered a biohazard when it cuts through the skin and gets into your blood and muscles.

Just imagining Matpat actually saying what Mad is spewing out is so cool, his high pitch voice and giggles makes the tension even more disturbing, and I thrive for it.

Honestly, he did make a good point on cannibals, but at the same time it’s Caliban, he’s a hitman who is smart on making a decision on whether or not someone would be worth keeping alive.

Keep a piece as a trophy, man that’s crazy, bro thinks he’s the alien Predator smh -_-

HELL YEAH THE GOOD OL’ SWITCHEROO (insert title card) Caliban is truly a badass and a terrifying dude.

Mike out here running towards Sparky’s like that one Flint lockwood meme I imagine, but HELL YEAH go find your boyfriend!!

MADS GET OFF OF HIM. NESS YOU SAVE YOUR MAN

YEAH BASH THAT FIRE EXTINGUISHER IN HIS FACE

My boys are finally together (granted in a supply closet hiding for their lives but they’re together nonetheless). Poor Ness is rubbing in pure fear and stress as Mike is just trying to grasp even a small concept of what was happening.

Lmao not them arguing like a married couple even while hiding from the massacre outside the closet.

OH SHIT BEAT HIS ASS CALIBAN, BREAK HIS NOSE. GO FOR THE THROAT MADS

Yeah, why DID you mistake your cyan jacket swearing boyfriend with a bloody teddy bear onesie man who is HOLDING A KNIFE, MIKE??? (I say as I wasn’t the first one who made him do that lol-)

Lol I like the thought of Caliban stopping in his tracks just to think of what Mads was referencing to, and immediately swinging again. (Also LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS REFERENCE??? :O)

OH SHIT HE’S DOWN THE CANNIBAL IS DOWN. Mads is so horrific when he’s all absorbed in his own righteous thoughts, but that’s the thing, he’s too self absorbed in his entitlement.

GET HIS ASS CALIBAN LETS GOOOOOO

Bro that swift breaking the broom and slamming it into Mad’s shoulder was awesome, Caliban out here just scolding his murderous tantrum while digging eh broom in his shoulder. Too cool.

Ugh, my heart. Mike protects Ness from Freddy’s, and Ness protects Mike from Mads. These two have my heart always, also WHY CALIBAN 😭😔

Even while he’s down and bleeding, Mads still needs to have the last word, spewing out his jealous resentment of Ness being the “normal version” of himself.

“I give you that,”

“REALLY?? :D”

“Nope :D”

“D:<“

Ness simply holding an unconscious Mile against himself while ignoring everything around him, including Caliban dragging Mads away, simply listening to Mike’s heartbeat is melancholic.

Eyyy, the duo are here! Time to make a bittersweet, yet somber comic. Coming right up!

Can’t wait for your epilogue friendo

HEY HEY HEY IM HERE IM HERR WITH THE NEXT PART @wouldntyou-liketoknow I GOT IT

Jack is a good roommate and babysitter, I say as he takes Abby to shoot a killer in the head (like I said, good babysitter lmao). Abby feels regret for being threatened and not being able to help her brother, but like Jack said, she’s only ten. Finally, Mike connected the dots and out he goes to save his family. @crazy-obsessed-enby @iswmperson @lexusinsannus

(Don’t worry, I’m not going to expose Caliban, that’s why his headlights are off) Meanwhile, Madpat got exposed (by a taxi)

Madpat proceeded to lose it even more and ran away again, there’s a hole in Jack’s car, Mike is filled with adrenaline and big brother instincts, and Ness and Caliban are silently driving in the darkness.

Shit will go down and I will await for your snippet, hope this doesn’t change what you had in mind 😭

[astra-knights]

Crashing Seas: Aphmau AU

Word length: 3900+

Summary: Ever since the early death of Mermaid Queen Rachel, King Derek of Atlantis shuts out anything from the Mainland and forbids interaction for the safety of his home. His eldest daughter Melissa has other plans and strives to discover more about the world she is forbidden to see with her brother, Aaron, and many of her closest friends. When she happens to meet a beautiful Mainlander girl named Lucinda, would Melissa risk all she’s known to know more about this girl and her world, or is she doomed to fail?

Note: This is based loosely on the Little Mermaid Disney film with unique twists and character changes, I hope you all enjoy! If you’d like to be added to the tag list, send me an ask or a dm <3

Tag List: @ptsdaaron

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter One: Breaking from the Wreckage

 Melissa was laying on her seabed, staring out the open hole of her bedroom. She was waiting for the sun to rise high enough to light the waters she lived in. She had her arm under her head, her brown hair floating around her. She was getting anxious, that was one of the reasons why she was awake before the sun touched the seafloor. She wanted to go scavenging again, and today was the best day for several weeks. Being the crowned princess was a pain, Melissa had to take extra classes, do extra public events, and have less time to herself compared to her younger brother Aaron. Even though they were two years apart, they couldn’t be more different. Melissa was excitable and adventurous, often the one getting caught in trouble out of the pair. Aaron was quiet and reserved, he knew how to not get caught. Despite the differences, they pulled a lot of adventures together. Their proudest adventures were scavenges from sunken Mainlander ships, finding new and interesting gadgets that they knew nothing about as Merpeople but were fun nonetheless. The two siblings loved their scavenges since it gave them a reason to get closer together. Ever since their mother died, their father had become distant and cold to them, so they relied on each other to keep afloat.

Sunlight broke through the water, fracturing in beams across the pale seafloor; the water went from a deep blue to a green-teal right before Melissa’s eyes. She smiled. She swam out of bed and went across the room to Aaron, shaking his shoulder rather aggressively, she whispered, “Aaron! Aaron wake up!”

Aaron whined, stretching a bit. He turned over and opened his eyes a sliver, the deep ruby color shadowed by his lashes, “Whhaaattt?”

“We need to leave, now!” Melissa said with excited urgency, “We’ll only get a few hours!”

Aaron rubbed his eyes, yawning, “What time is it?”

“Sunlight just touched,” Melissa replied.

“Sweet Irene, Melissa, how long were you awake?” he asked, sitting up.

Melissa hesitated.

Aaron looked at her, his face showed concern. “Were you thinking about Mom again?”

Melissa didn’t say anything, which only confirmed Aaron’s concern. She changed the subject, “Anyway! I saw this old wreck the other day over by the ravine, it’s close to falling in. We should head there first.”

“I, um,” Aaron didn’t want the subject to change quite yet. He didn’t like that whenever their mother was mentioned, everyone shut down on him. He had questions, he was missing some pieces, and no one will give him any. But he decided to leave it for now and he said, “Alright. Lead the way.”

Melissa grinned and swam over to the open window, looking over her shoulder to make sure Aaron was following. Melissa led the way to the ravine, careful not too swim too fast since Aaron tended to lag behind as he got lost in his thoughts. The swim to the ravine was far from any of the outside villages so they didn’t have to hide from the curious eyes of their people. Their father, King Derek, kept them on a tight leash ever since their mother died so it was rare to see the royal siblings out for a swim on their own without supervision. So, to keep their father from hearing about their adventures, they traveled early and away from anyone who could see them.

They arrived at the mouth of the ravine, Melissa stopped a little over the lip and looked for the ship. The ship was broken in half, the front of the ship was lost to the ravine, but the back of the ship sat balanced on a ledge several meters down into the ravine. The sunlight exposed the ship’s golden accents that would have been hidden in the darkness otherwise, that’s how Melissa found it. She smiled when she saw it, her whole body felt tingly with excitement as to what they would find down there. Aaron swam up next to her, he looked down at the broken, barely stable wreck of a ship and said, “Tell me you’re not serious.”

“Oh come on, Aaron,” Melissa said with a grin, “Live a little.”

She swam down towards the ship, Aaron followed with, “If I die I’m blaming you.”

Melissa was too excited to listen to her brother’s concern as she entered the large hole of the ship. She looked around the dim area, awed by the curious environment. She couldn’t name the objects around her like the globe, the astrolabe, the chart of the stars, the pens and ink wells, they were all foreign to her, but they were so interesting. Melissa approached the astrolabe first, it rested on a desk with an overturned chair nearby. She picked it up, turning it over in her hands as Aaron went over to the shelves. He picked up a small snow globe, though he didn’t know what it was. He shook it and watched the small flakes of fake snow float around, settling down on the plastic snow covered houses.

“Hey Aaron, check it out!”

He turned and saw Melissa looking through the astrolabe’s scope, she was smiling at him. She could see his face clearly, especially the amused look he gave her as he said, “You’re a child.”

“I prefer an adult that knows how to have fun,” she said with a grin. She lowered the scope, “What did you find?”

“Some—uh,” Aaron waved the snow globe around, showing it’s floating snow, “glass, ball, thing. It’s cool.”

“Oh!” Melissa said as she swam over to inspect it. She shook the snow globe vigorously, watching the blizzard of fake snow swirl around, “Awesome. We’ll have to take it to Dante, along with this thingy,” she said, holding up the astrolabe.

Melissa looked around for a bag or a crate to put the stuff in as Aaron moved over to the globe in the corner, he spun it around and watched it lazily as he said, “You know he doesn’t know what he’s talking about right? He doesn’t actually know anything.”

“He knows more than you,” Melissa defended, “He had a childhood friend on the mainland, he showed Dante all sorts of cool gadgets.”

“Ah yes, the boy with white hair,” Aaron said with a scoff, crossing his arms, “That doesn’t sound made-up.”

Melissa sighed as she over turned an open wooden crate, placing the astrolabe and the snow globe inside before picking it up, she turned to look at her brother. Aaron was playing with the globe, spinning it and stopping it before spinning it and stopping it again. Something was eating at him, that was obvious. Melissa swam over with the crate, she rested it on her hip and said, “Do you know where we are?”

“Not really.”

“We’re right,” Melissa spun the globe a bit before finding their home. Her finger tip covered part of the large tip of the Mainland and she slid it down a few degrees and stopping, “here.”

“How’d you know?”

“Mom showed me,” she said.

Aaron looked at Melissa, “We had one of these?”

“Not really, Mom found one and showed it to me,” Melissa said, “I think it’s a globe, if I’m remembering right. I think Dad got rid of it after she—” Melissa stopped herself.

Aaron looked over at his sister. Now was his chance. He swallowed and said, “What happened to her?”

Melissa didn’t reply. She turned away from the globe and said, “Let’s find some other things to bring to Dante.”

Aaron got upset and spun around towards Melissa as she packed the crate with other trinkets, “Why won’t anyone tell me anything? I’m not a child any more than you are!”

“It’s not important Aaron, just drop it,” Melissa said.

“It’s not fair!” Aaron shouted, “Why won’t you tell me anything? Why do you keep having nightmares about Mom? Why do you go out of your way to find these—these pieces of junk, when you know Dad hates it?”

“This isn’t junk, Aaron, they’re part of entire world!” Melissa defended, “An entire world we know nothing about! How can we just ignore them when bits of their culture are falling into our home every day?! You can’t expect our people to just ignore it.”

“So we go against our father, the king of Atlantis, to prove a point?” Aaron said, crossing his arms and leaning against a beam on the ship. “That’s a bit childish for the future queen of Atlantis.”

“Oh whatever, I won’t be queen for decades,” Melissa said, “And until then I’m going to do whatever the hell I want,” she turned and grinned at Aaron, “with my partner in crime.”

Aaron rolled his eyes, a tug of a smile on his face, “You’re not winning me over with that lame title.”

“Would you prefer…Double Trouble?” Melissa said with a growing grin.

“Don’t make it worse.”

“Couple of Dudes.”

“Please stop.”

“Beauty and the Beast.”

“Now you’re just insulting yourself.”

Melissa busted a lung laughing, she had to grab onto the nearby shelf for support. Aaron began to laugh at his sister’s hysteric laughing. Their relationship had its tensions, as many relationships did, and they always seemed to bounce back. But no amount of teasing and subject changes would stop the growing tension between the two.

When the laughter died down, Melissa said, “C’mon, grab more stuff.”

Aaron swam to the other side of the room to grab more trinkets, he grabbed a few before swimming back to his sister and putting them in. Once Melissa was satisfied with their haul, they left the wreck and swam out of the ravine. A few hours had passed while they were down there, so they were running low on time before they had to do royal obligations for the day. Melissa looked around cautiously before she said, “Hurry, let’s go to Dante.”

Melissa led the way to Dante’s cove located closer to the Mainland shores. Aaron followed after her, watching her with mild upset. He couldn’t help but kick himself for being so easily persuaded to change the subject he wanted to talk about for years. He knew that the Mainlanders were responsible and that her death was the reason for the ban of Mainlander interaction and objects, but there was more to it. He could feel it, he could see it in his sister’s eyes and his father’s cold shoulder, there was something he was missing, and it was his right to know. She was his mother too. He could feel his bond with his sister growing thinner and thinner the more she avoided his questions and changed the subject. He felt torn between knowing the truth, and keeping his best friend. He had no idea what to do.

Melissa swam to the mouth of Dante’s cove before stopping, she called inside, “Dante! You home?”

There was a clatter and a crash from inside followed by Dante’s voice echoing through the cove, “You scared me Princess, come on in.”

Melissa led the way into the cove and Aaron lagged behind. Dante’s cove wasn’t his home but it might as well be. It was a secret cove that was full of Mainlander trinkets and tools like hammers, screws, wrenches, clogs, and other bits of things. He liked messing around with Mainlander items to see how they worked and functioned. Since he was young he always had a fascination these types of objects, and then King Derek banned anything from the Mainland, so Dante moved to a secret cove. The only reason Melissa and Aaron knew about it was because Melissa wanted to know about the objects they found, and Dante was suggested. They had an agreement, keep Dante’s cove a secret and he’ll give any knowledge he could about any objects the siblings find.

Dante was swimming around his cove, rushing to tidy up his messy workspace with pulled apart objects and such. He pushed a crate onto one of the ridges in the cove as he looked over his shoulder to see Melissa and Aaron enter, “Ah, there you are. Sorry about the mess.”

“Is it messier than usual?” Aaron asked, looking around, “I didn’t notice.”

Melissa gave her brother a look as Dante swam down to them, he noticed the crate and put his hands together, “More goodies for me?”

“Sort of,” Melissa said, “Mind taking a look?”

“Anything for you Princess,” Dante said with a smile, “Put it on my desk.”

Dante led the way to his work bench, Melissa eagerly following. Aaron kept a few feet away, arms crossed, but his eyes on Dante and Melissa. Melissa put the crate down on his work bench and leaned on the table with excitement as Dante rifled through the objects in the crate. He pulled out the snow globe Aaron found and examined it, first the miniature snow-covered buildings and then tilting to look at the base. When he saw the floating snow, he shook up the globe and watched the fake snow fly around. He smiled, “I know this, it’s a snow globe. My old friend Travis showed me one when I was a kid.”

“Is that the guy with white hair or is this a totally new ‘friend’?” Aaron asked.

“Aaron,” Melissa warned as she gave him a look.

“May I remind you that you have a friend with bright red hair?” Dante said, “And my hair color isn’t exactly normal either.”

“Oh, so white hair is totally plausible then?” Aaron said, sarcastically.

“Absolutely,” Dante said with a tight smile, making Aaron roll his eyes. He added, “Careful, you keep doing that and your pretty eyes will get stuck there.”

Aaron glared at him and Melissa stepped in, “Aaron don’t be a jerk. If you’re going to be trouble, then watch the entrance.”

Aaron felt hurt that his sister didn’t take his side and he tensed up before he backed down and mumbled, “I’ll stay.”

Melissa nodded with vindication before she returned her attention to Dante, she leaned forward, “Go on, tell me more.”

Dante smiled at her and picked out something, the astrolabe Melissa was looking through earlier. He said, “Ah, beautiful,” Melissa smiled, excited to Dante put a name to the object she found. He looked it over and said, “This…this is a, uh,” Dante glanced at Melissa’s excited expression and felt a bit of guilt before he said, “This is obviously a…Scope…ilizer. Yeah, Scopeilizer.”

Melissa beamed at the name as Aaron snorted and said, “Yeah, that’s a real name.”

“Aaron!” Melissa scolded, glaring at him.

“Oh come on, that was totally a fake name,” Aaron argued, “He hesitated!”

“I just, forgot for a bit,” Dante defended, digging himself deeper into the lie he was building, “But it came to me in the end.”

“Thanks so much Dante,” Melissa said to him with a smile, “You have no idea what this means to me, to us. You telling me about these objects, helps me understand the Mainlanders more.”

Dante smiled a bit, “Anytime, Princess.”

“Gross.”

“Alright Aaron, swim along we’re leaving now,” Melissa said as she picked up the astrolabe and the snow globe, “You can keep the rest of the stuff Dante.”

“Very kind of you Princess, swim safe,” Dante said as Melissa swam towards the mouth of the cove.

Aaron hesitated, staring at Dante with both annoyance and confusion. Aaron was curious about his motives, what reason did he have to lie? And rather poorly too.

“Aaron! Come on!”

Aaron left the cove and swam after Melissa, who had waited for him. As they swam back towards the palace, Aaron said, “We’re cutting it close, aren’t we?”

“Don’t worry so much, we’ll make it,” Melissa said.

“But our cove—”

“Don’t worry about the stuff now, we’ll just hide it in our room for the night,” she said.

“Melissa—”

“It’ll be fine Aaron, trust me.”

Aaron didn’t trust her, especially with the very thing that could cause their father to burst into hellish flames. Aaron held his tongue, though he didn’t like it. They swam into their window and Melissa hid the items under her bed quickly as the door opened, revealing their father’s personal advisor.

“Morning Ein,” Aaron greeted, eyeing his very suspiciously acting sister.

Ein was the son of the former advisor to the king, and with his father’s recent retirement Ein was made the new advisor. He was good at his job and the siblings enjoyed having someone they grew up with in charge of their everyday life, rather than a bitter old man. Ein rested his hands behind his back casually and greeted, “Prince Aaron, Princess…Melissa?”

Surprised by Ein’s presence, Melissa slammed the top of her head on the base of her bed as she tried to get out. Ein had an amused smile on his face as Melissa showed herself out from underneath the bed, she smiled sheepishly and said, “Ein! How are you?”

“After that, much better,” Ein replied with a cheeky grin.

“If our father giving you trouble again?” Aaron asked as Melissa straightened.

“You know it’s illegal to talk bad about the king.”

“Since when?” Melissa asked.

“Since both my job and family pride are on the line,” Ein said with a small smile. “Either way, your father wishes to see you both before we start our schedule for today.” He waved towards the doorway, “Shall we?”

Ein led the way down the hallway as Melissa and Aaron followed. Melissa whispered to Aaron, “What do you think Dad wants to talk to us about?”

“Probably your terrible table manners.”

Melissa elbowed him, “Be serious.”

“I am.”

Melissa hit him, making Aaron’s teasing grin grow. Ein stopped at their father’s throne room and he said, “Here we are.” Both siblings straightened immediately in attention as Ein opened the doors and said, “Your highness, I present your daughter Melissa, and your son Aaron.”

Melissa entered first, followed by Aaron. Their father had his back to them, hands clasped. The two siblings could feel the rising tensions in the room, Aaron swallowed nervously. Their father said, “Thank you Ein, that will be all.”

Ein closed the door and they were left alone with their father. Derek turned to face his children, his face was sunken with the grief of losing his wife for many years and the isolation he caused because of it. He looked at his children as if he was seeing them for the first time, they looked a lot older than he remembered. When did they stop being so young? Melissa felt the awkward tension building and decided to speak, “Good morning father,” Derek looked at her, “Did you sleep well?”

“No,” came his blunt reply, “No I did not.” Melissa felt tenser now. Derek said, “I didn’t call you here for pleasantries. I called you two here to tell you, that from now on you two will be in separate rooms.”

“What?” Melissa said with sudden surprise, forgetting her place, “Why?”

“You need to focus on your preparations to take on the throne,” Derek said, “I want you to be ready when the time comes.”

“Which won’t be for several decades!” Melissa argued, “Father, please—”

“This isn’t up to discussion,” Derek said harshly, “You’re lucky I’m even telling you beforehand. Ein convinced me to on your behalf.”

“Father, please, we need each other,” Melissa said, desperate. She needed Aaron in her life, she wouldn’t survive otherwise; she couldn’t handle feeling alone. “I need him.”

“He’s holding you back,” Derek said. “My decision is final. Aaron, you are to move your belongings to a room on the other side of the palace—”

“Father!”

“You are not to visit her during her lessons, you are not to distract her from her duties as the future queen, do I make myself clear?”

Melissa looked at Aaron, wanting him desperately to say no, to tell their father off. But Aaron’s face was blank, he had shut himself down emotionally. He responded, “Yes, sir.”

“Aaron,” Melissa said, hurt by his betrayal, “Aaron, no.” She turned to Derek, “Father please don’t do this. We’re all that’s left for each other.”

“We’re done here,” Derek said as he turned his back on his children once again. “Ein! Take my children to their room, have Aaron pack and prepare Melissa for her lessons.”

Ein entered at the call of his name and after hearing his instructions, Ein replied, “Of course, sir.”

Melissa wanted to scream, shout, cry, something. But all she could do was glare at her father’s back with frustration and anger. Ein led them out of the room and back to their own. Aaron began to pack his belongings numbly, slowly, while Melissa sat on her bed in quiet thought and Ein stood out in the hallway. After a few moments of heavy silence, Melissa said, “Why didn’t you say anything?”

Aaron said, “What would I have said? He seemed pretty set on everything.”

“You could have backed me up,” Melissa said, “Actually show your support for me for once.”

“Are you serious right now?” Aaron said, “I’m literally leaving to go to the other side of the castle and never see you again, and you wanna start a fight?”

Melissa sighed, hanging her head. She couldn’t fathom being alone in this hell of a castle without her best friend by her side constantly. She didn’t want to be alone. Who would she talk to late at night? Who would help her with her lessons? Who would keep her secret with her? Who could replace someone like Aaron in her life? She didn’t mean to start crying and she sniffled, wiping her nose, “No, no, sorry. I just…I don’t want to lose you Aaron.”

Aaron had stopped packing, he hesitated before he said, “You won’t lose me Mel. You couldn’t if you tried.”

Melissa looked up at him and smiled. Aaron smiled a bit back, Melissa swam over to him and hugged him tight. Aaron held onto her, he was afraid of losing her just as much as she was of losing him. It was then that Melissa was struck with a wonderful, and very bad idea. She pulled away and whispered to him, “We should go see a Mainlander ship. A real one! Tonight, after sundown!”

Aaron was confused, “Wait, what?”

“You should come to me since I’ll be more guarded after my argument with father,” Melissa said, beginning to brainstorm. “We should bring Dante along too!”

“Wait, wait, Melissa—”

“No, no, you’re right, too many people involved,” Melissa said, “It’ll be us two, a duo mission.”

“Melissa hold on,” Aaron said, finally getting her attention, “It’s one thing scavenging a wrecked Mainlander ship for trinkets, but going to a live one? With Mainlanders on it? With spears?”

“Aaron you worry too much! We’ll be careful, we’re always careful,” Melissa said. She took his hands and said, “Please, Aaron, one final mission for us as a team. Our biggest plot yet. We’ll just watch, no interaction.”

Aaron hesitated, this had “bad idea” written allover it, like a majority of Melissa’s ideas. But the pleading look in Melissa’s eyes made him reconsider it. This was going to be the last fun thing Melissa would be doing for a while, and the last fun thing Aaron would do with his best friend at his side. He tightened his grip on her hands with assurance before nodding firmly, “Alright. Let’s find ourselves a ship.”

[floralicious]

in the frosty air

This is my gift for the LBMR Secret Santa! Thanks to @askalfendilayton​ for arranging the whole thing! 

My gift is for the wonderful @dont-drop-your-ascots

Now without further ado...

crossposted on ao3

Rating: General Audiences

-

Florence wheeled into Alfendi Layton’s office looking like a woman on a mission. Her hair was tied back, lab coat buttoned, and there were smudges of ink on her hands and face. She rolled over to Alfendi’s desk and slammed her hands onto the small part not covered with papers.

“Al, you’ve gotta help me,” Florence said, very nearly out of breath. “Christmas party. Will the Commissioner be there or not?”

Alfendi blinked at her from where he was sitting. “Pardon?”

“I need to know if Barton will be at the holiday party. Because if he’s there, I need to get him a nice gift. Stay in his good- achoo!” Florence sat back in her chair and pulled a tissue from the box on the desk in front of her.

“Oi, Flo!”

Florence nearly fell onto the floor. Lucy Baker had at some point materialized behind her, and was walking over with a bottle of hand sanitizer.

“It’s cold season, ya know. Gotta stay healthy!” Lucy said. “Nice decorations, by the way.” She touched the few layers of tinsel draped around Florence’s chair. Lucy then handed the family-sized bottle to Florence and disappeared to some dank corner of the small office.

A dry smile appeared on Alfendi’s face. “Lucy, you don’t need to mother everyone who comes in the office,” he said, glancing at the place to which Lucy had disappeared.

“I can and shall, Prof!”

“Much appreciated, Lu,” Florence said with a cursory glance to Lucy’s corner. She turned back to Alfendi and pumped some sanitizer.

“Florence, all I can tell you is that Barton is always at the party, which you know. What’s the real reason you’re here?” said Alfendi.

“I told you. Need a gift. For the Commissioner. Any ideas?”

“And this wouldn’t have anything to do with the new position in forensics opening up?”

“No!” she said, indignant. “If you must know-” Florence leaned as far as she could across the desk and lowered her voice- “I bet Sniffer 20 pounds that I can get Barton the best present ever.”

“That’s really not a big deal. The Commissioner just likes getting gifts, I don’t think he’s that hard to buy for,” said Alfendi. He pulled a snow globe sitting on his desk towards him. It depicted a snowman wearing sunglasses lounging by a sunny shore, and there were assorted beachy snowpeople decorating the base. Florence stared at the relaxing snowman as Alfendi picked up the snow globe and began to turn a key, causing a tinkling rendition of some Christmas standard she didn’t recognize to play.

Florence thought he must be intrigued by her problem if he picked up a snow globe instead of his paperwork. Or maybe just bored, but she really needed the help.

“Please, Al. It’s a matter of pride. Losing a bet to Sniffer Hague? No chance in hell.”

The snow globe stopped playing. Florence finally placed the tune- ‘Jingle Bell Rock.’

Alfendi put it back down on his desk and stood up. “Let’s go,” he said. “We’re getting lunch, then we’re both getting presents for Barton. Lucy, you coming with?”

“Can’t- already have lunch plans,” piped Lucy. She materialized again from whichever corner she was hiding in. She gave her boss an apologetic glance. “Have fun, you two.”

“Bye, Lucy, have fun with your plans,” Florence called over her shoulder. She had already wheeled halfway out the door.

-

“You can always do what I’m doing and get the Commissioner a gift card to a fancy restaurant,” said Alfendi. He was walking next to Florence along the pavement lining the shopping center. A brisk wind blew at the duo’s ponytails as they traversed the multitude of stores. A few inches of snow lay on the ground, turning quickly to slush with all the passers-by.

“We can’t get him the same thing, Al. Then Hague will know you helped.” Florence looked in the window of each store they passed, noting the various Christmas displays. She didn’t note the people staring at her lab coat and dirty face.

Alfendi stuck his hands in his coat pockets. “I don’t know. Writing pad? Fountain pen? Silverware? Gift card to a different fancy restaurant?”

Florence kept her eyes peeled. Skincare, no. Furniture, no. Creepy elf animatronic, a resounding no. Pots and pans-

“Hold it.” She froze.

“What?”

“What if…” She looked up to meet Alfendi’s eyes. “What if I made him food? Like his favorite dessert or something?”

He considered the idea.

“Florence Sich… You are a genius. Nothing Sniffer comes up with can beat that,” Alfendi said. They resumed their walk, this time in the direction of the Yard. Florence stopped gazing into every store display and focused on where she was going.

“What does the Commissioner like?” she asked.

“Hmm. Well, I know he’s not one for delicate dishes. But he loves a good sweet nonetheless. Maybe you could try giving him a pie of some sort?”

“I can’t cook, though. Nor can I bake. Al, any chance you know how to make haute cuisine?” She grimaced.

“I’m decent at baking, but nowhere near as good as you want to be to meet Barton’s standards,” he said, shaking his head. “But I know someone who can help. Do you know my sister Flora? Go see her, she’ll know what to do.”

“I hope so. I need all the help I can get.” The pair had reached Alfendi’s nearby car. They drove back to the Yard in the snow. Never had Florence been more grateful for the coat she had received from one aunt or another at some birthday. It may have been bulky and inconvenient, but it was functional in the old car with a broken heating system.

When they reached their workplace, Florence was no less frazzled than she was when the trip had started. Alfendi reached across her and took a pen and notepad from his glove compartment.

“Here’s the address,” he said, scribbling. “Flora will be there pretty much anytime before 6 pm. Just explain that you need to cook something and she’ll help you out.” He ripped out the piece of paper and offered it to Florence. She accepted the proffered address and made a mental note to stop by the place after work. “Thanks for your help, Al. I’m sure you’ll know whether I’m up 20 pounds or not after the holiday party.”

“Always a pleasure, Florence. Are we still on for coffee with Lucy next week?”

“Yup, yup. Have to go, Al, duty calls.” And with that, Florence was off to work.

-

Florence knocked on the thick wooden door. It was marked by a metal nameplate reading ‘Professor Layton.’

The address Alfendi gave Florence had led her to a small university she had considered applying to in her youth, out in the country. She found herself surrounded by old-fashioned wood and brick and young students milling around the campus. Unfortunately, the old building was filled with dust and rendered her considerably more sneezy than usual.

“Professor Layton?” she called. With no response, she tried the door handle. It was unlocked, so Florence entered. The office was lit warmly, and in a corner Florence noticed a desk. It was considerably neater than the one she had been staring down earlier that day.

Behind the desk sat a woman. Florence couldn’t see her face, as she was slumped over in sleep. Brown hair fanned out over her desk and around her shoulders.

Florence wondered if it would be rude to wake the woman. Probably not, she decided. Flora had looked kind in all the pictures Alfendi had sitting on his desk.

She tapped the woman on the shoulder. “Professor Layton?” she said again. “Professor Layton. Are you alright?” She sneezed into her elbow.

Flora sat up with a start. “What? Hmm?” She rubbed at her eyes. “Pardon me, but who are you?”

“I’m- achoo!- Florence Sich, Professor. I work with Alfendi. I was under the impression you could help me with something. It’s quite nice to finally meet you in person.”

“Oh!” said Flora. She pulled at a piece of hair that had escaped her tight ponytail. “Yes, I do remember a message from Al about that. You need to make the Commissioner a Christmas treat?”

The scientist fiddled with her coat buttons. “Yes… I’ve got a bet that I can get him the best Christmas gift. Achoo!” The place was really quite dusty.

“Bless you! So, what do you have in mind? Last I saw him, the Commissioner favored fruits… how about a fruit tart? That shouldn’t be exceptionally difficult. When can you give it to him?”

“I need it by next Friday. Can you teach me how to bake by then?” Florence asked.

“Let’s see.” Flora turned around in her desk chair to look at a calendar hanging on the wall behind her. “I’m free this Sunday morning at 11. Can you come over then and I’ll teach you? I can have Al send you my home address.”

“Would you really do that? Help me?”

“A true gentlewoman always helps a person in need,” Flora said. “Any friend of Alfendi is a friend of mine anyway. So will I see you on Sunday?”

Florence nodded eagerly. “Yes! I’ll see you then. Thank you so much, Professor. You don’t know how much this helps.”

Flora laughed. “Call me Flora, dear. I’ve made a few wagers in my life. I hope you win this one.”

-

“Gah! Why is baking so difficult?” Florence grimaced at the sight of the sugar all over her hands. She was in Flora’s kitchen, which smelled profusely of vanilla and butter. Flora stood next to her. Ingredients were spread all over the counter and Florence thought she must have a piece of every single one on the apron she had borrowed.

“Focus, Florence,” Flora said. “The cream is the hardest part. Once you get past this it’ll be smooth sailing.”

“I’m just worried about this- achoo!- party,” Florence said. “It’s not about the bet anymore. I actually want to make the Commissioner a nice gift. This year’s been a rough one for the Yard.”

Flora slowly poured cream into her bowl and began to mix with vigor, and Florence copied her. “Try to put all of that behind you. As long as you focus on the baking, I promise you it will turn out well and Commissioner Barton will love it,” said Flora.

“In fact, I was never much for cooking myself when I was young. Alfendi can attest to that. But with a few years of practice and a healthy dose of passion, I was able to make all sorts of good things. I bet it was sort of the same thing for you and detective work, huh?”

Florence sighed, pouring another ingredient in. “Yeah, but I’m a scientist, not a detective. You’d think I’d be good at this, dealing with measurements like I do.”

“Who said you weren’t good at baking?” Flora set down her own bowl and crossed her arms. “Look at what you’ve got there. That’s perfect!”

Florence looked down. “Huh,” she said. Her eyes widened. “Really? Is it okay?”

“It’s more than okay,” Flora said as she pulled their tart shells out of the oven, where they had sat for fifteen minutes. “It’s wonderful. And if you made this on your first try, being nervous, there’s no way you can’t recreate it next week.”

“Thank you!” Florence said. “Professor Layton, you are my Christmas miracle.”

Flora was beaming. “It’s always a pleasure to help, especially during this season! Now let’s finish these tarts!”

The pair finished the next couple steps with minimal difficulty. When they were done, Florence was dumbfounded at the neat appearance of her own creation. It looked too pretty to be something she had made, given the recent state of her affairs in the busy season. She thanked Flora over and over again before leaving.

“So will I be seeing you again soon?” she asked Flora.

“Sure thing, dear. I’ll make sure to drop by the party at some point. Have a lovely week!”

-

The Yard Holiday Party was by no means extravagant. This year it was held in a back room at the yard, as per the usual. It had been decorated nicely by someone. Probably Lucy, Florence thought, given the woman’s penchant for fairy lights. They were strung up on every table, around the walls, the tree, and even some people.

Tables with chairs were scattered sporadically across the small room, and a tree stood in the corner. It was done up with tinsel and paper clip garlands, courtesy of some bored Yard employees. Lights reflected off of red baubles hung precariously from the branches of the tree.

Various holiday sweaters abounded- from Dustin’s light-up Rudolph face to the Deputy Commissioner’s sparkly Christmas tree. Florence herself was wearing a simple red dress. Amidst the sea of sweaters she spotted Lucy wrapping a string of lights around Alfendi’s arm.

Florence went to where they were standing. “Have you seen Barton?” she asked, anxious to give him the treat she carried. “Oh! Looking good, Lucy.”

Lucy had switched her newsboy cap out for a Santa one covered in bells, and was wearing an atrocious fur-trimmed glittery sweater. Alfendi had obviously suffered a few hugs, being covered in glitter himself. “Cheers, Flo! Happy holidays!” said Lucy as she offered Florence a cup of cider. She took it and gulped down some in the hopes that it would distract her from the task at hand.

Alfendi offered her a jingle bell, presumably fallen off of Lucy’s hat.

“For good luck,” he said. Florence took it and tucked it into her purse. Alfendi smiled and pointed to the center of the room. “I think Barton’s over there. But Sniffer’s with him, so don’t let him get to you!”

“Thanks, Al. I’d better be off before Hague starts to sabotage me.” Florence carried her tart to the Commissioner himself. “Sir?” she ventured once near enough to give it to him. “This would be for you. Made it myself.”

The Commissioner took the treat Florence offered. “Ms. Sich, you didn’t have to get me anything,” he said. “And look- my favorite type of tart! My friend Layton used to make some just like this, you know.”

Sniffer Hague stood right next to Barton, upset that his conversational efforts to win him over had been interrupted. “Is that so, sir?” he asked, winking at Florence.

She was silent. The Commissioner paused, and everything seemed to slow down around the three. “Well, of course it doesn’t beat the signed cookbook you got me, but a homemade treat from the heart is really something special. Here, sit down.” He dragged Florence and Sniffer to a nearby table. “Let’s eat this right now!”

A crowd gathered around the table as the tart was cut into and eaten. “Merry Christmas, everybody!” said the Commissioner.

“Heh. 20 pounds to me…” Sniffer muttered to Florence.

“Delicious, Ms. Sich!” the Commissioner snuffled through a piece of tart. Sniffer picked up his own piece and started eating.

She flashed a genuine smile at the Commissioner. If she couldn’t win a bet, at least she had given Barton something he genuinely liked. She supposed that made the difficulty worth it. Still… all that effort for basically nothing.

She glared at Sniffer. “ I learned to bake just for this, you know,” she said.

“Really? That’s dedication,” he said, looking impressed. Bits of cream dotted his nose. “And this is really, really good. I guess I’ll let the money slide. But only because this is amazing, and because it’s Christmas.” Sniffer and Florence shook hands and smiled.

“Merry Christmas, Hague,” Florence caid.

“Merry Christmas, Sich.”

“Oi! You two! Over here!” They both looked over to where Lucy was calling them. “Let’s dance!” she said.

“I would rather not!” Florence shouted back.

��Jingle Bell Rock’ was blaring from an unseen speaker. Lucy shrugged and started dancing with a somewhat reluctant Alfendi. After a verse or two, they pushed through the crowd to sit with Florence and her companion.

“So? Who won?” Alfendi asked eagerly. “Sniffer called it off!” Florence said with a triumphant flourish. “Did I ever tell you your sister was a Christmas miracle, Alfendi?”

“I take that to mean that Hague won?” he said. He was grinning from ear to ear.

Hague nodded. “Sich here just put so much effort into this bet. Had’ta throw it. It is the season of giving, after all. Here, try some of her tart.” He pushed a plate towards Alfendi and Lucy.

“Well then, here’s a gift for you.” Florence placed the bell Alfendi gave her into Sniffer’s hand.

“Yes! A true reconciliation,” Lucy said. “Now, can we please rock around some Christmas trees?” The music got louder, and rock they did.

end

Bonus moodboard baby! Happy holidays!