#need his hand as a necklace rn >://

[doll-elvis]

our beautiful big daddy 💫

[properbastard]

[ on GOD i have got to get some sort of fidget ring or something. i am driving myself insane

[fics-lovebot]

enhypen fic recs pt.4

main masterlist - enha fic recs pt. 1 - enha fic recs pt. 2 - enha fic recs pt. 3

· · ♡ · · tysm to the amazing creative minds of the writers for giving me sevaral moments of joy reading your creations

pls remember to reblog if you like any of my recs❤️

random texts with bf!jay - ( @enha-stars ), love it

too sweet - ( @star-sim ) fluff, suggestive, badboy!jake, nerdy!reader, downbad!jake. Jay is scared he will hurt you in the future so he tries to break things off but at the end of the day he´s whipped LMAOOO, I LOVE ITTTTTT

say it back! - ( @star-sim ) FLUFF, non-idol! bf! jay, clingy cute!reader, whipped!jake, like fr, UGHHHHHHHH SO CUTE AND DOMESTIC

pics i posted on my ig story for my crush to see - ( @lattegyu ) ig stories, fluff, crack, smau, non idol!jay

pictures of bf!jay enha send you - ( @ddksoo ) text, fluff

justice and mercy - ( @thoughtsofmetaphor ) god!jay x virgin!reader, NAHHHH the potential rev harem this had is insaneee, i love it

eat the rich - ( @enhypencores ) chaebol!jay x fem!reader, wheeeewww, i love this sfdlsdjfljkshd he´s so manly and possessive

fuck buddy jake - ( @heeseungsbm ) smut, lowkey fluff bc he´s got a fat crush

texts with ex-bf!jake - ( @bywons ) fluff, CRACK, he´s down bad fr

pictures of bf!jake enha send you - ( @ddksoo ) text, fluff

necklace - ( @rikiislvr ) fluff, idol!riki, i WISH this would happen to me but i´m too broke to be frequenting the same stores as him alsjfha, need a part two asap plss

busy woman - ( @heedeungism ) fluff, angst, crack, lacrosse player!niki, rich kids au, highschool au, listen to me rn this is imPORTANT: this is one of THEE BEST NIKI FICS OUT THERE, NO QUESTIONS ASKED. i had to hide in every corner to read this at work bc 1) i couldn´t STOP reading it and 2) i couldn´t let anybody see me reading it bc it had me giggling like a dumb bitch. js go read it, pls and ty

string of fate - ( @acphengene ) fluff, angst, soulmate au series, idol!enha. YESSIIIRRRRR, i love love love love tHIS, one of the best enha soulmates au i´ve read so far, the niki one made me fucking cry omg, but my fav is deff jungwon, it was so good it made me read the whole series, did not dissapoint AT ALL, so do yourself a favor and read it to :p

helping hand - ( @ghstzzn ) smut. pro gamer!hee, bsf!reader. "heeseung had an unusual ritual before every competition as a professional league of legends player", you already know how it issss, some top tier head and now he´s begging and shi sjsjs, i loved this

bounded by fate - ( @tobiosbbyghorl ) fluff, ceo!sunghoon, lowk slow burn if you squint, secretary!reader, nahhhhhh why is he lowkey smooth and confident af, making me blush and shi

perv - ( @urlovebot ) smut. perv!sunghoon, non-con themes. oh,,,my god. i have no words,,i was literally reading this with a gaping mouth, ykw just go through her whole m.list atp

serendipity - ( @kaiyunsim ) fluff, spiderman!jake, if you love hot loser!jake as much as i do, you´re gonna LOVE this.

that was too far - ( @semisasseater ) angst, fluff, bf!niki. ni-ki took his joke a bit too far. this would SO happend to him irl too i fear

aftercare and pillowtalk - ( @enhani-ki ) fluff, bf!niki, suggestive. i loved it sm :(, and as an angsty fic lover & connoisseur my soul is bEGGING for a following part where hE breaks her heart (with hea ofc :p i´m no that sick and twisted).

king of tears - ( @enhaflixer ) angSSSt, fluff, smut, chaebol husband!sunghoon, maknae line cameo. WWWWWOW i ate this tf uPPPPP, girlllll this should be aired on netflix fosho!, so so gooD!

tying them up - ( @enhaflixer ) smut. WAIT WSIT WAIT WAIT WAITTTTT I WANS´T EXPECTING THIS I- miss girl you have opened my eYES to a better world, where pretty men cry. thank you.

fwb!sunghoon - ( @vampjaeyun ) angst. the ending :)))))))))))))))))) i´ll let yall see for yourselves. i almost crashed out at worK

strawberry kisses - ( @amoressb ) FLUFF. idol bf!niki. NAURRRR THIS WAS SO CUTE IT HAD ME TEARING UPPPPP :´) and not jake being an anti-romantic lmao

until i found her - ( @orimuraa ) FLUFF. down bad!enha, bad boy!enha. the niCKNAMES :((((((( thisissofuckingcute

is it a crime to be attracted to my girl? - ( @youngheejay ) suggestive, bf!sunghoon. lmaooooo this man was stressed oUT. and not him calling the others "bitchless losers" i cant

[silkentine]

All I could think while drawing Nami was, “Wouldn’t you like to know, weatherboy?” And, of course, with Robin I was thinking, “save a horse… 🥵”

Design Notes and other opining below the cut:

For Nami, I wanted to go for a mix of cocky Jersey mafia newbie and surfer boy. I like to think that some of the horrendous outfit choices that Sanji makes (especially in the movies) were actually picked out by Nami. She’s the shopper!!! But yeah, the vibrant swim trunks and graphic tees just scream Nami. I also wanted to put him in a wetsuit/rash guard because I think that’s a sexy look so sue me if you hate it. You cannot argue with me that Nami doesn’t wear swimsuits as clothes.

He’s toned but not as muscular as Robin or Luffy (for example) because he isn’t a front-line fighter, I want him to maintain the same kind of role that Nami has in the animanga. He’s the best navigator in the world!! I couldn’t decide if I wanted to change the violent tendencies that Nami has, but ultimately I think he’d still give the more deserving members of the crew a healthy wallop (although I might portray it more cartoonishly). Boy Piece!Nami still grew up under Arlong’s authority so he spent a lot of his childhood walking on eggshells to protect his village and his brother, Nojiko, so I think he never really got to learn “you’re not supposed to hit people just because they frustrate you” lesson. I gave him a shark-tooth necklace because surely Arlong had a few loose teeth to spare once Luffy took her down. Victory spoils LOL

If he can get the girls to stop wrestling and sit down quietly for a while, he likes to host card games (with betting, of course) or watch the clouds while sipping whatever fruity cocktail Sanji whips up. I believe that Canon!Nami is a total lesbian, and I can’t possibly envision a Nami who doesn’t like women so Boy Piece!Nami is bi. I am, of course, a Namivivi truther and Vivi is also a man in this AU. I don’t hate Sanami within this dynamic though… lots to think about.

Okay!!! All-shipper mindset aside, let’s talk Robin. I gave him long hair because 1) it’s hot and 2) I think it makes him look like Dragon. Yeahhh, I subscribe to the Luffy and Robin are half-siblings theory because I think it’s funny and makes some sense. Crocodile is 100% Luffy’s Mom in this AU and I think Robin knows it LOL

For his outfits, I wanted to lean a bit more Indiana Jones where I could; he’s still primarily cowboy inspired though. For the main look, I went with the Skypeia color palette hehe, I think Robin looks good in yellow. I did some flower-petal shaped color blocking on his chaps because I think it’s cute and subtle. I really love that the powers of the Hana-Hana-no-mi are like… unexpected for a “flower flower” fruit and I think Robin would be more aware that juxtaposition as a guy. You might also be wondering about the gloves and I initially just had it for his cowboy look but I decided to put them on all the outfits up until the events of Enies Lobby. Canon!Robin has a really difficult childhood and I think it’s exacerbated by the fact that she’s a girl on her own. If Robin was a boy, he’d probably have an easier time living on his own but would be a lot less emotionally open. All of these elements combine to make him want that physical barrier between his real hands and the world. Once he can trust that the Strawhats will always be there for him, he’s more willing to be more physically open.

I also think it’d be cute if he was much more of a coffee drinker :3c I see Canon!Robin as a connoisseur who likes a well-brewed espresso but Boy Piece!Robin needs a cup of joe (no matter its quality) every chance he can get. So I drew him with his special #1 ARCHAEOLOGIST mug.

It would make me so happy if you left your thoughts in the tags or replies!! Even if you hate everything about them, I just really like engagement hahaha. I’m thinking girl Usopp is next despite the poll results because she’s on my mind rn (don’t hold me to this, LOL I’m fickle). I’m making these for fun so I just wanna make designs in the order that interests me the most. Check out the tag “girl piece” on my blog to see all the genderbends I have so far. And happy pride!!!

[etherealrin]

⋆.˚ call it what you want

in which proplayer!sae could care less about what the media was calling you two, if it means being with you again

warnings: none // wc: 647

note: fem reader! badly proofread

the star midfielder of re al, itoshi sae, has a spotless reputation. there wasn't a single stain on his image, not one rumor or dating scandal. it was a matter of heated debate online; there were multiple twitter threads regarding sae's love life. was he truly single? perhaps not into women at all? did he have a secret relationship with another celebrity? if he did, he was remarkably good at never being caught.

so when a photograph of sae leading a girl to a secluded room, shot at an angle where one could only see a flash of glimmering hair, goes viral, the entire internet was wholly appalled.

sae scoffs as you read another article from your phone's news feed to him. "hey, look at this!" your tone is joking as you point towards the device's screen. "they're questioning if i'm some top hollywood celeb. is it because i dyed my hair recently?"

"love, that's stupid. you know dispatch reports more lies than truths." he replies, nose wrinkling at the thought. sure, you were beautiful, more so than any actress, but he really didn't enjoy all of the media speculation he received. was it so wrong of him to want something normal, to have a private relationship?

you'd known sae since before he went to spain, when you were just two simple kids trying to go through life the right way. when he had left, it'd caused a huge buzz in your town, japan finally receiving international attention for football. and you'd long since been regarded as sae's closest friend, so everyone was clamoring to ask you: would he ever come back? the drama queens threw their fits (sae had no shortage of admirers even then), many people called you a liar when you said that you didn't know, the pressure caused you to isolate yourself—done with how nosy the world was being. and of course, you missed sae more than anything. you'd mindlessly twist your fingers through the silver necklace he gifted you right before his flight, the 冴 character shining in the pale moonlight. no one else knew the words he'd suddenly whispered into your ears before he boarded without sparing a glance back; "i love you, i'll swear i'll see you again."

you'd kept that necklace for years, until itoshi sae appeared in japan once more, to play for a mysterious soccer match; and a front row ticket was mysteriously sent to your email. which you had never changed from before he left. nervous anticipation floods you, you were about to see your best friend who you hadn't heard from in years. when you finally spot him on the field, he looked nothing less than a daydream, dark pink locks impossibly perfect even against the wind and sweat. as he's being introduced, sae's gaze somehow found you amongst the crowd—you might have died. though he knew you would show up, he couldn't help but look for extra assurance. and you couldn't have predicted the whirl of events that happened after. his manager pulling you aside, saying that "itoshi sae needs to meet you," sae walking towards you with his head down, evidently trying to avoid the paparazzi, grabbing your hands and guiding you into an empty interviewing room; teal eyes glimmering with unsaid words.

your lips inevitably crashed into each other, you both had heard the cameras click and seen the flash of brilliant white, but none of you cared. "at least i did one thing right," is what sae had murmured after a few minutes, deft fingers tracing across your cheeks. his eyes flickered over the chain he gave you, one you'd never taken off. the media could call it what they wanted, because in that moment it was only you and sae. though perhaps it had always been that way—all it took was for one of you to see it.

a/n: dude i'm so obsessed w this song rn. also i finally stopped slandering sae who would've thought this day would come so soon!

masterlist.

[aubvrns]

"Longer Than A Fortnight"

| SVU & Headcanons

Synopsis — Their love languages towards you, and the kind they want to receive.

Note — Olivia Benson, Elliot Stabler, Alexandra Cabot, Casey Novak

(Female centered, but no pronouns used.)

———————————————————————

!!

Olivia Benson

• — Olivia Benson is 100% acts of service.

• — She is the kind of lover that will tie your shoelaces, even if she’s running late.

• — WILL AND I MEAN WILL, do the simplest tasks for you just because she can!

• — "What you do mean you went out to get groceries? Without me?"

• — Her way of saying "I love you." is to comb your hair after you finished showering, and she asks you to sit on her lap as she does. (biting my fists rn)

• — Though, she craves for words of affirmation.

• — She didn’t grow up in a home where she felt appreciated, nor did she ever felt the comfort of her parents.

• — But she knew she loved you when you told her the sweetest sentence ever.

• — "I love you so much that you make me get out of bed to get groceries."

• — Seconds later, you felt arms behind you. Not long enough before your shoulder dampens.

Elliot Stabler

• — This man is so quality time.

• — He knows he has a dangerous job that occupies his time, hours and hours in the precinct.

• — But any chance he gets, he will come home to you.

• — "Pack your bags, we’re going to Italy!"

• — He’s afraid of losing you, or letting you go to the plane’s bathroom because you’re comfortable in his arms.

• — Amidst the turbulence, he enjoys your physical touch.

• — From all the abuse and torment he witnessed, it’s rare for him to feel safe nowadays.

• — That’s why he isn’t afraid to admit that he loves the way you kiss his forehead, trace patterns on his gentle calloused hands, or spooning him when he gets nightmares.

• — "Italy won’t run away, let’s just stay 5 more minutes in bed."

• — More so, your vanilla scented hair was his view of a vacation.

Alexandra Cabot

• — Shoot me when I say this blonde’s love language isn’t giving gifts.

• — Being a lawyer with an amazing conviction rate also means having money, money, money!

• — She enjoys spoiling you, giving you everything you need and want just because she can. She refuses to let you reach for your wallet, at all.

• — "I bought the necklace you stared at earlier!"

• — Besides your lips, Ms. Cabot also tracks your eyes. (i would like to have you for christmas)

• — Staring at you, she never noticed how much she longed for acts of service.

• — Her parents were always away, and she was left alone. Her parents’ money were their way of saying they’re sorry they couldn’t come to her graduation.

• — She was surprised when you called in sick, even though she was the one coughing like there’s no tomorrow.

• — "What do you mean I could’ve bought myself medicine instead of your necklace?"

• — You can’t help but smile as you sat beside her laying body, wiping her warm face with a wet cloth as she explains how much your necklace reminds her of your eyes.

Casey Novak

• — This redheaded loser in a hot body cannot go on a day without physical touch.

• — She was raised as an affectionate child, expressing her love greatly as her parents did.

• — Her auburn hair is as warm as her as you lay between her arms, her face on the crook of your neck as she sleeps soundly.

• — "If only court saw how soft and adorable you are when you sleep, you wouldn’t seem so intimidating." You say, playing with her hair.

• — Smiling lovingly, she unconsciously pulls you closer.

• — Aside from her comfort, she adores your words of affirmation.

• — She was the kid who would wait in her teachers’ approval, hoping that she did good enough for their expectations.

• — Luckily for her, she didn’t have to wait anymore.

• — "You think I look soft and adorable when I sleep? I think I want to kiss you right now."

• — And she did, like the soft and adorable loser she is.

!!

[jyoongim]

I have a brainrot to share and maybe it's a request idk but I feel like I have to preface this by saying I swear I have normal non-horny alastor thoughts he's just really taking up so much space in the brain rn.

Anywaaay, can you imagine Alastor with an extremely cautious darling? He wants her soul to keep her tied to him forever but no matter how good his offer is, reader turns him down and Alastor is just like sick of the rejections and the scheming so he's just gonna stoop to some other ungentlemanly methods.

And the night starts off as their normal fuckery in the sheets but Alastor starts denying them their climax and as reader gets more and more desperate Alastor proposes the deal again. Sell him your soul or he's just gonna pull out and go to sleep and he'll never let you finish ever again. and just

i swear i swear im normal i swear im not always like this 😭😭😭

Themes: rough sex, orgasm denial, alastor being a little shit, dealmaking, hair pulling, pet names, plot if you look hard enough, soul possessing

Title: Deal of a Lifetime

Alastor had always made it known that you were his.

It took you a while to figure it out from the subtle lingering touches to the way he acted. No matter how much time you had spent with the Radio Demon, you were still wary of him.

its not like you could help it through. 

Does were naturally skittish anyway.

And when it came the smiling demon, you had every right to be cautious.

Tonight Alastor made plans for the two of you to go out on a date for dinner.

You finished preening your hair and rushed to the lobby to meet Alastor.

”O-okay I’m ready. Sorry if i took so long” you said nervously as you approached the tall red demon, a blush bleeding into your cheeks as Alastor let out a low whistle as he took your hand and spun you around.

”my my Darling, what a pretty Doe I have” he purred, kissing your hands.

Your nerves were going haywire, fighting your instinct to back away you smiled “so what do you have planned tonight?”

what do you have planned tonight? Alastor grin widened at the thought as he watched you happily look at the menu.

How pretty you were in your black dress. Gloved hands excitedly tapping the menu. A bright look in your eye as you honed in on what might be your dinner.

You even wore the necklace he had gifted you.

Alastor was content with the looks you got as you strolled around with him.

you were his and everyone knew.

But you weren’t his officially.

At least in his way.

For years, Alastor had offered you a deal; Be his. In body, mind, and soul.

He wanted you by his side forever and a deal would solidify that.

But each and every time, you rejected the notion.

”I dont need to make a deal to be yours Alastor” was always your answer.

And quite frankly, he was getting sick of it.

But he was nothing if not resourceful. After all, how else do you capture a Doe?

Make them drop their guard.

The two of you chatted and ate to your hearts content.

When the waiter suggested dessert, Alastor simply declined, stating he had other ideas sending you a wink.

Back at the hotel, Alastor whisked you away to his bedroom.

Once the door was closed, he pounced; lips on yours and claws tearing at your dress.

You were flustered and aroused. Your hands massaged at his undercut as he laid you on your back on the bed.

His lips trailed your neck, sharp teeth nipping at your flesh, causing you to gasp.

”Alastor”

He hummed as he kissed your torso, tweaking and sucking at your nipples.

His claws dipped to your pantie, finding them soaked.

He chuckled “such a needy Doe” he tore off your panties to toy with your puffy clit and circle your slit.

You tugged his hair to bring his lips back to yours and moaned in his mouth as a finger dipped into your cunt.

Satisfied with how you began grinding into his hand, he discarded his pants and his heavy cock slapped against your mound.

You panted breathlessly as he teased his cock along your slit. You hooked a leg around his waist and threw your head back as he sunk into you.

Soft thrusts opened you to allow him deeper into the warm canal.

You arched as he steadily picked up his pace.

Your nightly rendezvous with the demon always made you feel exhilarated.

Alastor was very attentive to you. Always knew what made you tick.

He knew your body better than anything, so when he saw those pretty eyes flutter and how you cried out in pleasure, he knew how to handle you.

Your cunt was clinging to him with each thrust he gave you.

The sound of him sinking into your warm depth was music to his ears.

”On your knees dear” he said, patting your thighs.

Happliy, you turned over and lowered yourself into a deep arch, presenting him with your adorable ass and wet cunt.

Alastor admired you.

how submissive you were.

He growled as he lowered his weight on you and guided his cock by to his haven.

You gasped, feeling a hand wrap your hair into a fist, pulling your face up out the pillows “You sound so lovely doe, i wanna hear those tunes of yours”

His thrusts were hard, jolting your body as he rutted into you.

Subconsciously, you tried to meet his thrusts, whining as he hit that spot that has you seeing hearts.

”A-Al-Alastor i-I’m gonna…” you moaned feeling your cunt be wrecked.

Your insides tingled with the telltale signs of your orgasm.

But your sweet release was ripped from you when Alastor slowed his pace.

You tried to wiggle your hips against him, to seek that explosive pleasure.

Alastor was having none of that.

”Not yet darling” 

over and over he teased you right to that delicious edge, just to rip from you.

You were sobbing, ears flat to your skull as your cunt fluttered from your orgasm being denied.

You reached for him, whether for a anchor or a silent plea, you didn’t know.

You whimpered “Alastor please!”

His smile creased his cheeks, feigning a concerned tone “What ever the matter my dear Doe?”

He started thrusting into you, relishing in the soppy squish and how deep he was able to sink into you.

”Please please let me cum. I can’t..I-Ill do anything!”

A harsh thrust made you squeal

”Anything?”

You nodded, a moan ripping from your throat as he teased your throbbing clit.

”Then be mine. Submit your entire self to me my sweet doe. I already your sweet body and heart, but give me your soul. Let me own your very essence. Grant me that darling and ill grant you the sweet relief you so desperately crave” 

your insides clenched as he kissed your shoulder, beginning to pound into your soft cunt.

”or i empty myself inside this sweet cunt of your myDoe and you’ll never be granted a taste of my cock every again”

His lips at your ear, “your choice so what do you say Mon Cher?”

his hips grinded his cock into.

”Do we have a deal?”

You cried out, feeling your orgasm teetering “yes! Yes!Yes! YES! Please Alastor! Alastor just let me cum please please”

You felt your ring finger burn as he chuckled deeply

”why of course sweet Doe, cum for me”

A high pitched scream racked the walls as your orgasm clashed into, sending you in a babbling mess.

Alastor rode out your orgasm as he thrusted into you, before emptying himself inside you.

You shook as he wrapped you in his arms, bringing your hand to his lips.

A shiny gold ring adorned your hand.

He pressed a kiss to it and then an affectionate kiss to your forehead.

”Sweet sweet doe, my sweet Doe, all mine” 

[rannie-moon]

enchella | week 2

synopsis: coachella week 2, and heran having everyone in a chokehold (let's all act surprised)

masterlist | wattpad

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ the day had finally arrived—enchella day 2, and heranchella!!! (we all screamed)

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ please she was so nervous even before their set, and the fact that she was performing an hour after the group? yeah she wasn't doing too good

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ they performed the same setlist as the week before so nothing much changed, besides jake who decided to act up

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ but let's move onto the happy things, like her outfitttt!! okay so you know those black jellyfish dresses? now that, but she wore it as a top over a pair of washed out cargo jeans, with this grungy looking belt and a pair of boots. she wasn't too decked out in jewelry besides for a necklace and her earrings

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ bro hasn't seen his girlfriend in like 3 weeks and she was finally there 😭 (shout out to my girl chaerin that hasn't even made a cameo in the book yet)

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ the crowd was so much bigger than the week before don't even play rn. they were so surprised when they walked out

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ beat those "enhypen had a dead crowd" allegations into the ground 🙏🏼

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ the members could see that heran wasn't feeling too good

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ she was performing, sure—but it wasn't her. not fully. not the same girl who set the stage on fire and headlined articles the week before. her energy was off, her eyes constantly the crowd like she was searching for something to ground her

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ sunghoon kept nudging her every now and then, shooting her tiny smiles that she barely returned, jay was sure she was ready to spiral. they hadn't seen her this nervous to perform since their debut days

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ so when the group finally got a quick break on stage, panting between songs with the crowd roaring in front of them, jake didn't hesitate

"sorry to do this right now," he said into the mic, turning around with a quick glint in his eye, "but can the cameraman put heran on the screen for a moment?" the second her face appeared on the giant led behind them, the crowd exploded. heran blinked, startled, head whipping around to jake like: what the hell are you doing. Her cheeks flushed a pretty pink instantly, putting a hand in front of her face as she tried not to look directly at the camera "our engenes know it's jay's birthday today right?" jake grinned, gesturing to jay who dramatically bowed at the sound of the screams from the crowd. "but something else really important is happening later this evening." heran immediately covered her face again, leaning into heeseung's side to stop herself from crying. the crowd got louder. her members all surrounded her, trapping her in one of their infamous group hugs. "I'm sure you all know already," jake continued, "hailey is performing her own set tonight!" the roar of the audience felt like a wave, heran peeked through her fingers, her lips parted in disbelief. "so I need you guys to scream for her just like you did for us," he said, turning back to her with a smile, "because she's gonna fucking kill it."

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ It was the most heartwarming moment anyone in that crowd had ever experienced, and it took every nerve in her body to stop herself from crying

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ she slowly got back into the swing of her usual confidence, drowning out her thoughts in the music and her members performing their hearts out beside her

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ did someone say "heran prada lipstick moment 2.0" ??? HELL YEAH YOU DID!

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ Instead of kissing the camera though she had another idea, a small thank you to her members for doing literally everything to make her feel more at ease

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ so she did it. like actually did it. with that signature smile and her nerves finally under control, she reached into her pocket and pulled out the lipstick just like the week before—enigmatic scarlet 05, the legend herself

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ sunghoon saw what was happening, his smile dropping the second that she wasn't heading to the camera like she did the week before. he IMMEDIATELY took a step back, but he didn't even have enough time to say anything before he felt her lips on his cheek, already running over to jay

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ jay was literally trying to shoo her away like she was bee smh but it didn't work. bro said that it was his birthday present 💀🙏🏼

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ sunoo looked like he was about to file an HR complaint but accepted his fate earlier than the others. heeseung was already standing there with his cheek turned. man was READY because all he could think about were how the fans were gonna edit him (sigh)

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ ni-ki took one look at what was happening, screamed, and ran across the stage. full-on bolted. she had to sprint after him mid-song, the other members following so that they could hold him still, while the audience lost their minds

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ and then there was jungwon. easy and half paying attention to what was going on because he was laughing so hard

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ the fans already knew he wasn't going to resist like the others, it was just how he was 😭😭 he was just standing their, soft and smiling like the compliant boyfriend he is

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ she reached up, one hand cupping his face so delicately like she'd done a million times before. she leaned in, gave one sweet kiss on his cheek—then pulled back and kissed his jaw

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ the screams? deafening. the camera crew? zoomed in. the internet? crashed.

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ jungwon barely flinched—just kind of looked down at her with that small smile, the one he always had just for her. and if you looked closely, if you paused the fancam at exactly 2:19, you could literally see him mouth “aren't you cute?” while she grinned back.

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ bitches were out here like "oh my god the members faces! they looked so shocked!" EH WRONG! LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER NOISE! hyunmin's face??? the txt members faces??? because they were in the crowd too!! YEAH TAKE A DAMN HIKE

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ hyunmin had his eyes closed, looked like was mentally counting till 10 while nari was jumping up and down beside him

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ yeonjun straight up grabbed the arm of one of their staff members like "are you SEEING THIS?" taehyun had already pulled out his phone and was recording for archival purposes 😭

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ soobin looked just as terrified while huening and beomgyu were LAUGHING, hitting each other on the arm

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ the lipstick stains stayed. they really just stayed. like seven little chaos badges across all their cheeks. jake’s was smudged, ni-ki’s was practically war paint from the struggle, and jungwon’s? yeah. perfect, untouched, and glowing on that jawline like divine intervention

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ by the time they hit their final pose of the last song, heran was back to full power—cheeks pink, eyes bright, and mouth curled in the kind of smile that fans wouldn’t stop reposting for the next six months

💬 : chaotic siblings and then there's the bf who doesn't even flinch 😭😭 💬 : jungwon isn't even resisting anymore he said take everything I have 💬 : hyunmin's gonna fight someone backstage idc 😭🙏🏼

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ shall we talk about the comeback announcement at the end...? YES WE SHALL

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ FREAKHYPEN LIVES ON!!! the members were howling when they heard engenes screaming from backstage like damn calm tf down 😭

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ but it was just another heartwarming backstage moment, everyone's adrenaline wearing off slowly except for heran who barely had time to calm down until her manager and stylists were ready for

⋆. 𐙚 ˚ "heranchella we're waiting for you!" was all she heard heeseung scream when she made a beeline to the exit, that familiar pit in her stomach turning into something a little more determined

⤹ comment or pop a message into my inbox if you'd like to be added to my taglist

taglist: @angie-x3 @deluluscenarios @chaeryyeongz @akitoshi39i @sparklydoll444 @yunjiiin @kaitieskidmore97 @yb763

[drak3n]

PARAMEDIC!SUGURU

CONTENT WARNINGS: fluff, smut, strangers to lovers trope, reader passes out, ambulances, sutures, blood, soft!suguru

sena’s note: i’m so down bad for jjk men i don’t have any words… i’m tweaking rn just thinking about suguru in paramedic gear—

MINI-SERIES MASTERLIST

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who was just about to call it a night with his coworker and drive back to the fire station to be relieved by the night shift, but held back a groan when a call came in

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who was told that a lady in her twenties had passed out and hit her head while at work, and who forgot all about after hours as his colleague drove towards the workplace at full speed with blasting sirens

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who rushed inside the building of the given address — a restaurant — with his colleague, paramedic backpack draped over his shoulder to be fetched by the shift supervisor who had made the call

“i don’t know how it happened... she was prepping in the back along with another worker and i suddenly heard clattering. when i checked, she was passed out and bleeding all over the floor.”

suguru’s amber eyes narrowed at the way the man explained the situation, and he left it to his colleague to register the workplace’s and your data while he entered the back to see you seated on a chair, weakly holding a cloth against your profusely bleeding forehead.

“ma’am, i’m here to help. may i check?” his voice was mellow and smooth, and you lowered your shaking arm to let his gloved hand check beneath the cloth. you were barely able to sit, yet, you looked at your coworker with exhausted eyes. “i’m okay... why did you call the ambulance…? he’s probably mad now.”

“you’ll need stitches for that wound,” he informed you, which made you sigh shakily as you gazed up at the tall man. all you saw was a blurred, tall silhouette wearing a vibrant, red uniform that stung your eyes, and a bun of dark, long hair. “my colleague will be here with a stretcher. could you look at me for a quick second?”

long, gloved fingers gently lifted your chin to check your pupillary response with an ophthalmoscope, discovering that your pupils were unusually dilated. high chance of a concussion. when you heard a stretcher rolling inside the room, you let out a confused hum.

“i—i can walk,” you slurred, accompanied by the supervisor also annoyingly confirming that there was no need for the stretcher. suguru quirked a brow at your supervisor, beckoning his colleague closer with the stretcher.

“there absolutely is a need for that,” he countered, “now kindly back away, sir.” his tone was warning, and the older man hesitantly stepped away while the two paramedics lifted you off the chair carefully to lay you down on the stretcher, securing you as you gazed up with blank, confused eyes.

geto stayed in the back with you during the drive to the hospital, and he made sure to check your vitals and ask you questions to make out the severity of your concussion and to see how well you responded.

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who found it endearing that you insisted for him to hold your hand throughout the ride because you had never been in an ambulance and it was scary and cold

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU whose eyes didn’t leave your form until you were brought into a treatment room, barely able to let go of your hand

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who only noticed at the fire station after clearing out the ambulance that there was a silver necklace with your initial in a corner, a necklace he was sure he had seen on you before you were transferred into the ambulance

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who despite having just gotten off an excruciating 12-hour shift and wanting to have nothing more to do with hospitals for the day, found himself heading back towards the hospital you’d been delivered to

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who saw you sitting in the hallway, waiting for your CT scans with a bandage around your treated head, and who approached you in civilian attire

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who returned the necklace to you and helped you put it on, waiting for your results with you while you were still quizzed as to why he was with you, still clearly confused

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who drove you home because you had no one to pick you up, and who accompanied you all the way to your door; who didn’t leave without taking your number to check on you

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who really did check in with you very frequently until you were feeling better again, and who was positively surprised to see you at the same hospital again a week later to get your stitches removed

“does this scar make me look goofy? be honest.”

suguru took your hand to stop you from touching the scarred and still sensitive tissue, giving you a soft smile. “no, it just puts a little badass in your adorable self,” he chuckled. your eyes went wide as you looked away bashfully.

“are you off work now?” suguru tilted his head down to look at you, you wouldn’t meet his eyes. cute. “i am. just need to head back to the station and get changed. why?”

“i’m really hungry. you wanna grab food?”

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who never failed to kiss the scar on your forehead, grazing his fingertips against the imperfectly perfect feature on your face, and who got heart eyes whenever you shyly showed him how much you love him

➩ PARAMEDIC!SUGURU who always subconsciously shielded your head from possible danger; who covered your head with his hand while opening cupboards close to you, or who always covered the edge of a table with his palm when you bent over to pick something up; and who despite being so caring, couldn’t help but poke a little fun at you

“you okay like this, angel?” a shuddered whimper left your lips as you got settled on top of your tall, handsome boyfriend who was laid on his back. plush thighs straddling his sides, you relished in the feeling of him inside of you.

he didn’t move an inch. all he did was stare into your eyes and cradle your face in his warm hands. all you wanted was to show suguru that you were a big girl, that you could take it, that you were—

“i—it’s—,” you moaned into his hand, your own clammy palms shooting forward to clutch at his toned stomach, “y—you’re so mean, sugu! you promised not to move!” his long strands of jet black hair bounced when he chuckled heartily. he couldn’t help it.

“i can’t help it when i’m inside the prettiest girl in the world,” he mumbled against your lips, capturing your lips in a greedy kiss that swallowed your moans. “want me to take over? all you have to do is ask.”

your begging eyes were enough for him to flip you over.

tagged: @melancholia-k @tansyfleurwhisper

[sergeantbarnessdoll]

heyy i have a request. I'm drunk rn and I wish Bucky could take care of me and make sure I'm safe and alright. could you write that?

Drunk Doll » Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier

Pairings: Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader

Summary: Bucky takes care of you and makes sure you’re safe while you’re drunk.

Warning: Fluff, language, alcohol, kissing, hangover, pet names

A/N: Thank you to the lovely anonymous person who requested this🩵

Written on my phone. I’m sorry for any mistakes.

Header made by @buckys-wintersoldier

GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creators. I found it on Pinterest.

Bucky watched from where he was sitting as you down the rest of your third margarita and downed tequila shots like it was nothing. He drank the last sip of his beer before standing up and making his way over to you. You downed two more tequila shots before he got to you.

“How many margaritas and tequila shots have you drank tonight, babydoll?” Bucky asks, leaning against the bar counter.

“Umm…” You tried to count on your fingers, but you had too much alcohol in your system to count. “Not enough.” You finally answered.

You reached for another tequila shot, but Bucky grabbed it before you could. You whined and reached for it.

“That’s mine!” You whined.

“No it’s not.” Bucky put it behind him so you couldn’t reach it. “You’ve had enough for the night, doll face.” He put some money on the bar counter. “You’re drunk and I’m taking you home.” He says.

“Fine.” You mumbled with a pout.

You jumped down from the bar stool, immediately loosing your balance. Bucky caught you before you fell. He picked you up bridal style and carried you to the car. He opened the car door and put you in the car, helping you put your seatbelt on and then got in the car.

“You look like my boyfriend.” You tell him, staring at him.

“That’s interesting. Tell me about him.” He says, going with it.

“Umm…” You thought for a moment. “He uhh- he has pretty eyes and the same color hair as you. He’s strong and tall. He has the same necklace as you and- oh! He has an arm made of metal.” You say, describing him without realizing it.

“That’s very cool. Wanna know something interesting about yourself boyfriend?” He asks.

You nodded your head eagerly.

“I’m your boyfriend.” He tells you.

“No way!” You say, completely speechless.

After a few minutes, you fell asleep in the car. When you two got home, Bucky carried you in the apartment complex you guys live in. He unlocked the door to yours and his shared apartment with you in his arms and took you to yours and his bedroom. Bucky laid you on the bed gently and helped you out of your clothes.

“Hey!” You smacked his hands away. “I didn’t give you permission to do that!” You say.

“I’m trying to help you put on something more comfortable, doll.” Bucky explains.

After staring at him for a few seconds, you allowed him to help you change out of your clothes and into one of his shirts. Bucky left the room for a moment to get you some water and came back.

“Drink this.” He says, handing the cup of water to you.

“What is it?” You asked in a mumble, staring at the water in the cup.

“Water.” He answers. “You need to stay hydrated.” He says.

You drank some of the water before handing it back to Bucky. He put it on the nightstand on your side of the bed and got in bed, shutting off the bedside lamp.

“Bucky?” You mumbled loud enough for him to hear.

“Yes, doll?” Bucky asks.

“Can I have a kiss please?” You asked.

Bucky leaned over and kissed your cheek. You pouted, wanting a kiss on your lips.

“That’s not the kind of kiss I wanted.” You say with a pout.

“What kind of kiss do you want, doll?” He asks.

“Lips.” You answered.

Bucky smiles at your cuteness and drunken state. He leaned over you and kisses your lips sweetly.

“You need sleep.” Bucky pulled you close to him and rubbed your back with his metal hand. “Goodnight, babydoll. I love you.” He whispers.

“Goodnight. I love you too.” You mumbling, falling asleep.

The next morning you woke up with a pounding headache and the sun peaking through the window. You whined loudly and put the pillow over your head to block out the sun.

“Good morning, babydoll.” Bucky greets softly with a cup of coffee in his hand and sat down on the bed next to where you’re laying.

“It’s not a good morning. It feels like I’m dying.” You say from underneath the pillow.

“You’re not dying. You just have a hangover.” He says.

Bucky took the pillow off of your head, making you whine. You sat up, glancing at the nightstand. Bucky had already put a glass of water and some aspirin there. You drank some water and took a couple of aspirin.

“I hate this.” You mumbled, holding your head in your hands.

“I know, doll.” He says, gently rubbing your head.

“You’re lucky you can’t get drunk.” You say.

Bucky chuckles a little and gave you the cup of coffee. You took it from his hand and took a sip.

“I take it that we’re having a lazy day today.” Bucky says.

You nodded and leaned back against the headboard, tilting your head back against it. Bucky put a comforting hand on your knee.

“You need something to eat.” He says, standing up.

“Not hungry.” You mumbled.

“You need to eat something, doll face.” He states. “At least eat some crackers.” He suggests.

“Fine.” You mumbled.

Bucky held his hand out, helping you out of bed. You went to the living room and sat down on the couch while Bucky went to the kitchen to get the crackers. He seat down next to you and gave you the crackers. He turned the TV on and out your favorite show on, putting it on a low volume. You ate a few crackers before snuggling yourself against his side. You grabbed Bucky’s metal hand and put it on your forehead, sighing in relief when you felt the cool metal against your skin.

“So my metal hand is an ice pack now?” Bucky asks with a small chuckle.

“Yes.” You answered. “It’s cold and I like it.” You tell him.

Bucky kisses the top of your head and pulled you onto his lap. You laid your head on his shoulder, your face against the side of his neck.

“Thank you for taking care of me.” You say.

“You’re welcome, babydoll.” Bucky says softly.

🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵

-Bucky’s Doll

[grapenamjams]

Arcane Loris x Pregnant!femReader

“Oh no you don’t” Loris voice rumbles out hitting the walls of your shared apartment. Next you hear his thudding steps towards you. Large tan hands taking the box filled with groceries from your grasp.

Lifting it onto the table. His eyes give you a once over, taking in how your pregnant belly imprints against your simple dress. “Please tell me you didn’t carry this up the stairs yourself.” His tone gentle laced with worry, which many don’t expect coming from a large man like him.

“It’s not that heavy. Just greens and a couple of vegs” you go to lift up the box to prove your point but Loris scoots it away, furrowing his brows at you. His silence speaking volumes at his disagreement.

You give him a small smile stepping closer to him “don’t give me that look” rubbing his arm reassuringly “the young boy down stairs ran to the shops for me and brought it up.”

Loris breathes out a sigh of relief that you had followed his request of not using the stairs outside the apartment without him. He brushes your hair back, leaning down to press a kiss to the top of your head. “Still, shouldn’t be lifting anything, hon” he mumbles into your hair, taking in your fresh scent.

His eyes glancing to the kitchen. a pan already on the stove and bowls filled with ingredients on the counter. Mind already flicking with ways you could strain or hurt yourself. If he could, he’d have you just rest the whole nine months. But he had to accept-with numerous glares and clever retorts from you- that wasn’t gonna happen. His lips tilt up at the memories. The fire in you he fell in-love with still burning bright against his calm demeanor.

“Lo, im Not weak. I am carrying your child here” his attention goes back to you. “kicks from her makes me think she’ll be joining your fight trainings before she can talk”

He lets out a chuckle. Pulling you closer into his large frame. Feeling you rest your head in his sturdy chest, watching his hand come to rub your 6 month old belly. “Trust me hon I know you’re not. But you know, I just want you and baby-wait she?” He stops himself, leaning back still holding onto you. Brown eyes widening.

Placing a hand over his on your belly. you shrug with a tentative smile. “It’s just a feeling”

his eyes light up with a smile on his rugged face. His chest expands with adoring affection at the thought of having a baby girl. Carrying her small body in his arms then seeing her run around his legs with a joyous, laugh, bubbling out of her hopefully resembling yours.

His free hand goes to your face, swiping a knuckle under your chin. “She’s, gonna be a fighter like her mama”

You hum, a finger hooking onto his pendant necklace. “If she’s anything like me then you’re in for a ride” bringing him down towards you.

Loris grins leaning his head “that a promise?” Sealing his words to your lips.

Because I can’t get enough of him rn.

Loris as a partner headcanons ⬇️

Oh he would not leave the house until he knows you are doing okay.

Need clothes folded? Done. Foot massage? On it.

Same with arguments he’d try work it out in the moment. Big on not going to sleep angry. But in those cases where there are arguments without a resolve insight at the moment. He’d know that you both needed to be alone so he’d go out and drink. However he will not be too far off. Bringing his drinks outside. Resting his back against the wall of your apartment. You can push him away but one thing about this man is that he’ll always be at your disposal.

Expect daily check ins. He is going to want to hear about your day and your thoughts.

Every decision he makes he has you (his family) in mind. Knowing his decisions affect you as well so he’ll ask your input. Ultimately, He’d choose what he thinks is best for the family but still wants to know where you stand and try to come to an agreement.

Silent but aware. He can read your body language like the back of his hand!

Would offer his hand to you so you can fidget with when you get anxious.

Always close enough to you so you can reach him. Knowing he helps you keep you grounded.

Letting you and his daughter braid his hair and add beads into it. Yes yes!

[luigis-wetdream]

no matter how short or tall you are this man will press you into the wall and into A MATING PRESS. your legs? in the air. throat? his big ass hand is your necklace. your clit? his big ass balls are pounding against you with the heaviness of his body. nipples? sore and puffed up from his nonstop bullying of your body. oh and if you try to run away from the pleasure he’s giving you ohhh nooooo that’s a fuck no cause he’s so condescending and MEAN about it. “ohhhhh nooo baby. stop running from it. you can take it, mhhh hmmm,” he breathes, laughing breathlessly while he angles his cock deeply into your g-spot releasing a squeal from you, body trashing around from the sensation and all he does is wrap his arms to hold you in place with a “look at me pretty girl, focus on me.”

anon……..do not fucking test me rn😭😭😭😮‍💨😮‍💨

running from his dick is the fucking sexiest thing he’s ever seen . i am a tall girl, 5’6 or 5’7?? and these legs WILL go behind my head. i guarantee lu would make your toes touch the head board while he’s holding the back of your thighs, railing you. i absolutely need his mouth and canine teeth to be devouring my tits as he fucks me DUMB on his dick .

“you wanna run now from this dick, baby??” while fucking PLOWING you.

maybe it’s my past relationship trauma, but Luigi NEEDS to bully this pussy until he knows it belongs to nobody but him. and he’d know it. circle that tongue around my nipple right now, daddy. 🤤😫😫

[lolapiastri]

his sinful secret | p. gasly

warnings: smut, heavy religious imagery and themes, a sinful amount of dirty talk, like pierre cannot stfu, heavy degredation, everyone gets head, choking, a some praise, spitting, this is like actual filth maybe being ill makes me horny idk

author's note: i'm blaming this filth on the fact that i'm under the weather rn but jesus christ be fucking warned, she's a roller coaster

pierre prided himself in his religion. it was important to him, that belief in a higher power was the faith he needed to live the life he did. it seemed the driver life was one full of jealousy, gluttony and lust, but he was determined not to fall victim to the sins like so many before him.

so he payed his dues. he went to church whenever he had a free sunday, said a silent prayer for his friends and family every night, gave thanks to the lord before every meal as a token of appreciation.

his religion wasn’t a joke to him, it never would be. it was a belief that kept him sane, kept him in order, kept some sense of purpose and responsibility in his life. it wasn’t something that he would pick and choose whether to follow or not. he was all or nothing with his belief, and he chose all.

until he met you.

you were his sin personified, his dirty little secret. whenever you two were together all thoughts of his religion left his mind, as he now existed to serve you, to worship in between your thighs, listen to your moans as if they were gospel. it was like any holy thought left his mind the second your skin brushed over his.

he never wanted to give into the temptation. he saw you as a challenge, a sign to resist sin and stay thinking holy thoughts. but when you showed up at the club in a tight white dress, hair tumbling over your shoulders as your hips swayed provocatively to the music, he knew that nothing could stop him taking you home that night, and many a night after that.

which is how he ended up knocking on your flat at 9pm on a monday evening, the day after a tough race where he just felt useless. a double dnf for alpine followed by a race without points. he felt horrible, felt like a failure, and all the comfort that his producers and members could give him could never make him feel as good as you could.

the warm orange hues of a southern french sunset lit up your apartment as you swung open the door, the golden hour glow accenting the faint highlights in your hair. you were underdressed for pierre's standards, normally revealing yourself to him in a lacy set he bought for you, or sometimes even nothing, looking like a greek statue as you left nothing to the imagination.

today was different. you weren’t expecting him; you had no warning to any chain of events about to follow. so you opened the door to show yourself in a white linen shirt, almost certainly his, that was so large on you it was practically a dress, that you had been lounging around your flat in.

pierre didn’t care, however, thinking you were still as stunning as ever. the white made your tanned skin seem darker, and with a few buttons undone your cleavage was truly out on display, a teaser at what he would truly see later. a pair of large hoops hung in each ear, with a small chain around your neck with ‘10’ engraved on it finishing the look. he loved that necklace, a sign that you and him had some kind of connection, even if it was only through a piece of jewellery.

“you alright?” you asked, eyes scanning from head to toe. it was rare for pierre to show up without telling you, if he ever had. there was a silent agreement that he would let you know when he needed to release energy, to be in your presence, to succumb to the sinful energy you supposedly emitted.

he shook his head. “fucked the race yesterday. now wanna fuck you.”

and there it was. the switch that flicked where pierre ignored his religion, ignored the purity and goodness he was supposed to uphold, and you became the deity he worshipped.

his hands grabbed your face as he pulled you into a needy kiss, calloused fingertips rough against your smooth skin. the kiss held a thousand emotions: anger, upset, disappointment, lust, love, and enough passion to knock you back on your feet, needing the stability of pierre's hands to stay upright.

he always kissed you like it was his last on earth, like he may never get to do this again so he was going to savour every second of it. and he was so passionate - maybe because he was annoyed, maybe because he was stressed, or maybe because you were the only person who got to see this pierre. this raw, untamed, animalistic pierre who you adored seeing so much.

he slowly edged you back into your room, hips pushing against yours ever so slightly, enough to encourage your hips up against his, creating the tiniest bit of friction to ease the growing need between your thighs. you heard him shut the door behind you, never once taking his lips off of yours, befor his hands slid from your face to your neck.

you let out a quick gasp as he squeezed into your skin, feeling him smirk into the kiss as your breathing got shallower and shallower. he often did this. pushed your boundaries as far as he could push them. watched as your slowly cracked under the euphoric torture he performed on you.

he pulled back from you, letting out a chuckle as you chased his lips. he looked down, easily towering over you, a look of fake-pity etched all over his face.

“look so pretty with my hands wrapped around your neck, huh?” he asked, almost certainly a rhetorical question as he squeezed that slight bit harder, looking down at your thighs rubbing against each other, determined to find some relief from the ache in your core. “and you love it as well, love it when i choke you, when i treat you like a slut.”

his words went straight to your core, and you couldn’t rebute them without the lie showing all over your face. pierre eased up on your neck, hands now trailing down your body, over your rib cage, counting down with such an intent focus you would think it��s the first time he’s ever seen your body.

“wearing my shirt, must have missed me?” he asked, tone nonchalant but undertone the opposite. the agreement is that you don’t miss each other. you don’t have feeling for one another. you fuck. that’s it.

you took in a deep breath as one hand crawled under the white linen and felt the material of your underwear. lace, of course. pierre's favourite. you were aware of how his race went yesterday, and you were planning on sending him some photos to ease the pain. you did that often, when things weren’t going so well for him in the f1 world, a little pick me up in the form of barely lit lingerie pictures and videos of you moaning his name.

“never,” you teased, your hands rising over his shirt, pulling it off his body and exposing him in all his glory.

my god, was he stunning. you had never seen another man like him, one so broad and muscly yet slim and defined. his skin had grown darker in the past few weeks, undertone becoming more and more golden as his hair lightened under the european sun. he’d been keeping his hair long lately, and though you weren’t a fan at first, when you gripped it while he was your legs it was safe to say it grew on you. his eyes had a chill behind them, one only you were lucky enough to see, which told you that he had one hundred wonderful and wicked ideas to try out with you.

“white lace?” he questioned, having a peek under the shirt, the colour not normal for you. pierre liked navy, so that was what you normally wore, as well as black and red. he didn’t even know you owned a white set, and he had seen a lot of lingerie on you.

you hummed. “you like it?”

he loved it. loved the way the white material contrasted your skin, the way the quickly fading light bounced off it making you glow, the way he could already see the wetness collecting from your arousal. and most of all, he loved the way you looked angelic in it, look like the heavens yourself had sent you, because nothing you ever did was angelic. you were never angelic when you sucked him off, let him fuck you into oblivion, enjoyed being degraded and teased, and when you dressed the part, it somehow made everything more dirty for him.

“would love it more if you got on your knees.” the suggestion was an order, and of course you obeyed, sinking into the cold wooden floor of your bedroom and looking up at him with blinking eyes.

he looked majestic, light pouring out from the window behind him. and when he went to unbuckle his belt, your mouth already starting salivating in preparation, knowing what was coming. pierre must have been able to sense your eagerness, as he let out a wry chuckle looking down on you.

“always so fucking desperate for it, aren’t you?” all you could do was nod in response, leaning forward as mark slid his trousers down to pull his dick out from his boxers.

you were still in awe every time you saw his cock. sure, you’d been big dicks before, but pierre's was something in of itself. it was as majestic as his body was, and taken care of the same way.

you went to take it in your mouth, but pierre quickly tangled a hand in your hair and pulled you back, letting out a soft chuckle as a pout appeared on your lips.

“honestly, i don’t fuck you for two weeks and you forget all your manners. you think you just get to suck my cock? you think you’re worthy of that? dumb little girl.” his degrading words went straight to your core, you having to resist the urge to squeeze your thighs together as you looked up at him pleadingly.

“please, pierre,” his hand tilted your head up, nothing stopping your eyes from baring into his, seeing the devilish glint in his eye, “please.”

“please what? come on, good girls know how to beg properly,” he teased, watching down evilly as you whined at his harsh words.

you took in a deep breath. “please let me suck your cock, pierre.”

he nodded. “keep going.”

“please, just wanna make you feel good. please let me suck it, all i wanna do,” you were unravelling, slowly losing any previous willpower you had to resist his charm, diving headfirst into the depths of hell you two created together. it was a beautiful chaos, a place the two of you could completely unravel and just be morsels of sex and passion. “please, pierre, just want your cock in my mouth.”

“fuck, your such a whore for me. never seen such a lovely girl want cock so bad. but you’re not a lovely girl, are you?” you nodded, so desperate for him. “that’s right, baby, you’re a desperate little slut who’s only thought is dick, so why don’t you show me how much you love this one, yeah?”

his words would be the death of you. they were your bible, you would have done anything he asked you do when he was speaking in that deep, honey tone, french accent getting thicker and thicker as he lost himself in the moment. whatever he preached in church, said as he prayed, these were the opposite of that. these were the thoughts that hid in the back of his mind until he was around you, and then they were an unstoppable spew of sin and lust and as many other unholy emotions he could think of.

you sunk down on his cock as soon as you had permission, taking as much in as possible before starting to bob your head, swirling your tongue when you rose to the tip of his dick. he let out a deep groan when you choked around him, his length still too big even after a few months of sucking him off. his hand tightened around your scalp, guiding you up and down and up and down.

you pulled back to catch a breath, a string of saliva still attached to his dick, creating a link between you. pierre watched as you licked it up, before replacing your mouth his your hand, throwing his head back as your thumb rubbed over his tip.

“tell me how much you love this cock, baby,” he grunted, his words not surprising to you. when everything seemed to be going wrong in his life, pierre thrived on the praise of others. his parents, his mechanics, his engineers, and in this state you. any words that made him feel appreciated, needed, loved, he thrived on.

“love it so much, baby,” you panted, “so so much.”

and with that you started sucking again, still using your hand on everything you struggled to fit. his breaths got shallower and shallower as you kept going, feeling the muscles in his chest tensing as he got closer and closer to his high.

“look at you on your knees for me,” the hand in the back of your hair tilted your head towards the mirror you had in your bedroom, and the sight was one you were sure would be engraved in your memory for years to come.

it was like a renaissance pairing, the way the two of you looked. both glowing in the sunset light, sweating clinging loose strand of hair to your foreheads. pierre's mouth was hung open, defined abs clenched, looking completely gone with pleasure. your back was arched while on your knees, thighs clenched together as your mouth swallowed pierre down, tears slowly building in your eyes, threatening to break loose and paint your cheeks with mascara stained water.

“want me to finish in your mouth?” he groaned, obviously so near to the edge. but he always asked. no matter how intense anything was, pierre always asked.

you hummed in agreement around his cock, sending vibrations through the sensitive skin and bringing his orgasm that little bit closer. he took complete control now, fucking your face with sporadic, wild thrusts, before pulling back and waiting for the orgasm, your hand guiding him through it.

“open your mouth, baby,” he grunted, on the brink of the most sinful euphoria he could feel, “stick your tongue out for me- there you go. pretty little slut on her knees for me. never seen such a beautiful girl act like such a whore-”

and with that he came, covering your tongue and lips with his cum, groaning as he finally got the high he’d craved after the last two weeks. you carried him through it, keeping your mouth open until he’d completely finished.

“show me your tongue, baby,” he panted, a maniacal laugh appearing when you eagerly showed him your face. “god, you’re so good for me, you look so pretty covered in my cum, huh? go on, look at how messy you are for me.”

you turned you back to the mirror, and you got a proper look at how gone you were. your tongue was still out, eyes dazed over, nose to chin covered in pierre's cum, with your cheeks stained with mascara tears.

he pulled your head back, forcing you to look back up at him, before he leant over and spat in your mouth, the most sinful action of the night.

“swallow it up, yeah, there you go,” he almost whispered, and you did as he said, taking everything he had given you and the rest that he swiped in from your cheeks. “god, you’re always such a good girl for me.”

he was always softer after an orgasm, like he suddenly became aware of how harsh his words were, how you could easily take them the wrong way. you never did, but you appreciated the effort, and you appreciated him.

wait. no you didn’t.

“up you get, baby,” he cooed, helping you stand up and immediately wrapping your legs around his waist, carrying your through your flat like it was his own. he had spent so much time here it might as well have been.

he placed you down on the bed, letting you lean against the frame as he dimmed down the lights, leaving the room in a small, romantic glow. he finished undressing himself, before finally turning all of his attention to you.

this is where it became a sin.

see, pierre didn’t believe that pre-marital sex was a sin. well, whether or not it was he was more than happy to partake in it. what was a sin, however, was worshiping false deities. yet that’s exactly what he did to you.

after the agression you had just experienced, pierre knew it was time to turn his attention to in between your thighs, somewhere he could sit for hours and never get bored. it was a form of worship, how he treated you, one that he could never admit to the universe, a secret shared between the two of you.

his hands ran up your bare thighs, kneading them as his mouth followed, leaving a trail of wet, sloppy kisses along your skin. your legs spread automatically, a sigh of pleasure already coming from your mouth, just the motivation pierre needed to keep going.

"fuck, baby," he gasped, as one of his fingers stroked over your panties, feeling your sticky wetness caused from pierre's dirty words earlier, "fucking soaked for me, huh?"

"yes," you sighed as one of his fingers found your clit, making ever so light circles over the lace, "only for you, pierre."

"i know, baby, god you look so beautiful like this."

and he wasn't lying. with your back arched, a thin layer of sweat coating your skin, his shirt bunched up around your ribcage so he could see the rise of fall of your stomach as your breathing got shallower. he thought you were majestic, undenyable beauty, something to be worshipped.

so that's what he did.

he pulled your panties off and dived straight into your pussy, nose hitting your clit as his tongue worked wonders, lapping up the wetness and causing pornographic sounds to emit from your throat. god, was he good at eating you out, and when he added to fingers and curled them against that spot inside of you, you knew you were not lasting long.

"baby- oh my god, pierre- i'm gonna cum," you whined, hips bucking so much pierre had to use one of his arms to hold you in place.

pierre chuckled against your clit, the vibrations just bringing you closer to the edge. "yeah, i'm making you feel good."

"so good, pierre, so so so good."

and that was enough for him. sometimes he would make you beg, have you crying from the edging he would put you through, but he knew he was harsh earlier, and you had been so good your deserved to come.

"come for me then, baby," he grunted, fingers speeding up their pace, "come all over my fingers, make a mess of me, baby."

he words tipped you over the edge, the feeling of euphoria washing over you as pierre carried you through your high, breathing finally slowing down as pierre abandoned your pussy and staring leaving open mouthed kisses against the soft flesh of your thighs.

"think you can go once more for me?" he asked between kisses, and however tired you were you always wanted to please him, always wanted to make him feel good.

so you pulled him over you and braced yourself as he pushed inside of you, the stretch making you hear colours as his lips finally connected with yours for the second time that night, tongue exploring your mouth until he was fully inside of you.

"never gonna get over how good you feel wrapped around me, baby," he mumbled against your lips, pleasure evident on his face, "so fucking warm and wet, this pussy was made for me, wasn't it?"

you couldn't even respond, mouth stuck in an o-shape as he began to thrust in and out, his tip hitting your cervix as he picked up the pace.

"don't know what i would do without this cunt, think i would go insane not knowing this is always here for me, because it is, isn't it? this is my pussy."

pierre told himself he would hold back but he just couldn't help it, the feeling of being inside of you driving him crazy as his hips snapped against yours. only pierre's sinful words and the sound of skin against skin filled the room now, the feeling ever so dirty and sinful, just the way you both liked it.

"my fucking pussy to do whatever i want with, my playtoy, that's what you are, yeah?" he teased, and all you could do was whine in response as you grew closer and closer to your second orgasm.

"just a set of holes for me to use, aren't you? can't even speak because i'm fucking you so good, huh? just a cumdump for me, a slutty, pretty, cumdump. you want my cum, my pretty little whore?"

all you could do was nod, hoping that was enough for pierre right now. he chuckled, but you could tell he was close by the way his thrusts were growing irregular. and he could tell you were close by the way you clenched around him.

"you wanna cum? tell me who's making you feel this good."

you mustered up all the energy you had left to speak, hoping the words came out of your mouth. "you, pierre, only you can make me feel this good."

"tell me you belong to me," pierre didn't even know what he was saying at this point, the words leaving unconciously, his sinful desires becoming more and more evident in the world.

"i'm yours, pierre. every part of me is yours, i belong to you. god-"

"yeah, that's right, i'm your fucking god," he grunted, and that word, even though it's not what you meant, made both of you come undone together, a moan leaving both of your mouths as pierre collapsed against your chest, chests rising and falling as you attempted to calm down.

pierre pulled out, ever so gently, and knelt on the floor at the end of the bed, watching as some of his cum escaped from your swollen pussy. gently, he used his finger to scoop it up, and push it back into your cunt, before leaning back over to meet your lips in a kiss.

"thank you," he muttered, "for this. hope i wasn't too harsh."

you chuckled. "a little, but you know i like it. shit, though, i would have called you god sooner if i knew it would get that reaction."

with those words, pierre froze. those words should have never been said, should have never been put into the universe. it reminded pierre of his sin, of everything you tempted him towards. with no other option, he chose to escape your lustful allure, and made a mental note to pray tonight.

"gotta get back to the office, usami will be expecting me," pierre left one final kiss on your cheek before leaving.

you pouted, so many unspoken words floating on your tongue. stay. be mine. i love you. yet none of them were said, instead sending him a sad smile before grabbing your phone from your bedside table, just hoping deep down he felt the same way.

if only you knew you were just his sinful secret.

[sasageyoarmin]

"wait a minute, are you jealous?"

---

hi favs!! pretend im not posting this like super late but college is literally kicking my booty rn and im trying my best to get this request out

this prompt from this list was requested by @decayedbong like a while ago so this is wayyyy overdue but here u go my love <33333

warnings: suggestive content at the end, martial jealousy, slight possessiveness

wc: 2.5k

<3

“Armin, could you help me for a minute with this necklace? I can’t seem to get it on myself.” Armin finished adjusting his tie and turned toward the direction of his wife’s call. He knocked gently on the bathroom door, stepping into the room after hearing her response.

Armin let out a breath of disbelief and awe at the sight of his wife in front of him, dressed in a deep red satin dress that reached down to her ankles. The fabric hugged her curves in the most beautiful way, highlighting the dips in her hips and the contour of her chest. “God, babe, you look gorgeous.” He gazed down at his wife, rubbing the stubble of his chin with his hand as his eyes trailed over her body.

She blushed at his response to her outfit, making a mental note to bring the dress out for another occasion if he was going to act this way towards it. “You don’t look so bad yourself,” she smiled, walking towards him to flip down the collar of the red button-up that matched her dress, a sharp contrast to the black blazer and slacks he was wearing. She stood on her toes, reaching for his jaw to give her husband a quick kiss before turning around so he could place the diamond necklace on her.

“Mmm, I love this necklace.” Armin fastened the gold clasps as he placed a kiss on the back of her neck, urging her to spin around so he could see the full picture.

She turned around, giving him a slight curtsy as her eyes met his, which slowly became darker with need as he continued to gaze at his lover. “Well thank God, it would have been a waste of your money if you hated it.” She giggled, letting out a ‘thank you’ in appreciation of the gift she had received on her birthday just a few months ago. She glanced at her phone, checking the time. “We only have a few more minutes before we need to leave, can you make sure everything is in my bag? I’m just going to put my heels on.”

Armin let out a nod, leaving the bathroom to check the items in her clutch purse.

---

It had only been an hour since they got to the party, but Armin had already had enough. What was supposed to be a simple gathering of Armin’s work friends had slowly turned into an event where every single person gawked at his wife. She was well-dressed, obviously, as noted by the other women at the party, both those who worked at the law firm and those who accompanied their husbands like his own wife did. It wasn’t the women who annoyed him though, it was those who he thought were buddies of his, male coworkers who would even look away from their own wives to stare at the woman in the red satin dress who sat at the bar next to Armin, sipping on a Malibu Bay Breeze with dark red painted lips.

Armin wasn’t the type to get jealous -- he knew his wife better than that to know that she would never cheat on him, even when given the opportunity to. However, he still felt possessive when other men would take a look at her, maybe since he didn't always feel worthy enough to have her, regardless of the number of times that she proved otherwise.

He needed a moment to clear his head.

“Babe,” he started, his hand trailing on the back of her dress as he stood up from the barstool. “I’m going to run to the bathroom, I’ll be back in a minute.”

She nodded an okay, pressing a kiss to his lips as she let him leave, continuing her conversation with his coworkers nearby.

After a few minutes, Armin felt like he had convinced himself enough to not be jealous of his wife, feeling stupid for acting in such a way, even if it was only in his head. He stepped back out into the bar area, catching his wife chatting with one of the younger interns at the company.

The jealousy immediately came right back.

Armin glared at the man next to his wife who was so obviously glaring at her chest, even though she was paying no attention to it. He watched from afar as the man talked to the bartender, ordering her a drink despite the half-full glass in her hand. She leaned towards him, laughing at something stupid that he must have said, probably a joke about finances or work or something boring that she could care less about. Regardless, she looked beautiful next to the half-wit of a man, and the sight was making him more and more upset by the second.

Once he saw the man put a hand on her thigh, even just for a moment, he knew that it was enough. Armin didn’t even see his wife retaliate or look disgusted at all, which added to his frustration. She wasn’t the best at picking up signals from men trying to flirt with her, given that Armin had always been so direct towards her, yet she didn’t even appear to look uncomfortable at all.

“Hey,” Armin said in a stern voice towards the man, turning his back towards him slightly as he stared into the eyes of his wife. “What’s going on here? Hmm?” He asked, trying not to seem like a total douche for asking his wife a simple question.

“Oh, nothing,” she responded while smiling up at her husband, obviously having no idea how he was feeling about the situation. Once her gaze focused on his tight lips and furrowed brows, she knew something was wrong, yet she brushed it off for a moment. “Mark here is just telling me a story about a funny client of his.”

A fake laugh came from Armin’s mouth at the excuse used by his wife. He knew that this guy - Mark - was just a new intern, not an employee who could take clients in the slightest. He was practically a coffee boy who fetched random things for Armin’s coworkers when they needed him. There wasn’t even a reason for him to be at the party.

“Oh, I see.” Armin faked a smile towards him, which she could tell wasn’t real, and she furrowed her brows in confusion. “Mark bought you a drink, too, didn’t he?” Armin knew that he was being annoying on purpose, yet there was no reason for Mark to buy his wife a drink, especially when he knew that her husband was just steps away.

“Oh! Yeah, wasn’t that nice of him?” She said, looking up at Armin with a smile. He gave a fake one back and responded with a stern ‘yes’, immediately feeling a pang of guilt since she seemed to be oblivious about the entire situation. Still, he was upset, and he wanted to get his wife away from the man and the party in general.

“Well, Mark, I think we may be heading out in a few minutes. I’m not feeling very well and we have quite the eager dog to feed back at home.” Armin subtly reminded Mark of the life that he and his wife had at home, trying to get him to back off of her.

“Really?” She asked, not wanting to push Armin to stay if he truly wasn’t feeling well yet not really wanting to leave either. “If you’re not feeling well though, we should head out.” She gave Armin a soft smile, still oblivious that Mark was hitting on her. “It was nice meeting you, Mark!” She said, taking the last sip of her drink and hopping off of the barstool.

“It was lovely meeting you,” Mark replied, exaggerating the word. “I could get your number so we could talk more often?” He asked, even though it was more of a demand than a question.

She finally caught on. “Oh. Umm, I don’t know.” She stuttered out a reply, realizing that Mark had been hitting on her. She felt a slight pang of sadness at the thought of losing yet another possible friend to flirtation tactics.

“She doesn’t want your number.” Armin glared at the man, giving him a fake smile for the final time that night. “She’s coming home with me tonight.” Mark caught on to Armin’s jealousy, laughing once he realized what was going on. He mumbled something under his breath that sounded like ‘pathetic’ and stood up from the stool, banging his class on the table.

After saying their goodbyes and having the last bits of food, the couple headed outside to continue their discussion, the tension hanging high in the air. They stood just outside of the restaurant under a pavilion as the wind blew around them, causing goosebumps to form on their skin.

“I should have brought a jacket.” Armin’s wife voiced aloud, not meaning it to say anything other than a critique toward herself. Armin thought about not handing her his blazer but decided that he would rather have an upset wife who’s a comfortable temperature versus an upset wife who’s cold. She took the jacket from his arms instead of letting him put it on her like he normally would.

“I’m surprised you’re even giving me a jacket.” She scoffed, retorting at his actions.

“What?”

“Don’t act like I can’t see right through you, Armin. I don’t know why you’re mad at me, but obviously something I did pissed you off.” The woman glared up at her husband, looking away with a scoff when he glared right back at her.

“You’re oblivious,” Armin said, letting his jealousy get the worst of him. He would surely regret saying that, but at the moment, it felt good.

“Excuse me?”

Armin cursed slightly, realizing the weight of what he said. “I didn’t really mean that.”

“Okay?” She replied, not taking him seriously. “What did you mean, then?” Her voice had an angry tone to it now that she realized Armin was annoyed at her for seemingly no reason. In her mind, nothing she had done was wrong, it was just a night out with Armin’s work friends.

“I just- I don’t know how you didn’t realize that Mark was hitting on you.”

“Wait a minute, are you jealous?” She asked, realizing what this whole issue was about. “Armin, Mark was like years younger than me. What makes you think I was interested in him?”

“I don’t know!” Armin responded with a sharp tone, his words loud. “You were leaning into him and laughing. He bought you a drink! How did you not know?”

“I’m sorry?” She didn’t feel bad at all, instead, she was wondering why her husband was so upset about this issue when it seemed like nothing to her. “I was just trying to have a conversation with someone who I thought was a friend of yours. Why is that so wrong?”

“It’s not-” Armin cut himself off, trying to lower his voice to not amplify the situation. “It’s not inherently wrong. If he wasn’t staring at your boobs or anything or asking for your number.” He retorted back.

“That’s not my fault and you know it.” She responded, glaring up at him again before scoffing. “You can’t get mad at me for that.”

The weight of her words finally caught up to Armin and he let out a curse at his realization. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry about that.” His hand touched her arm as she let him step forward, trying to apologize to his wife. “It’s not on you, baby, I’m sorry.”

“You mean it?” She said, still slightly annoyed at him.

“Yeah, yeah, I mean it.” He said, reaching around to hug her, trying to make up for his wrongdoing. “I just let jealousy get in the way of us, and I never want to do that to you, that’s not fair.”

“Well, I’m glad you acknowledged it.” She let out a smile, breaking away from the hug to look up at him again, this time with softer eyes. “Thank you for apologizing, baby. Do you want to talk about what made you jealous? It might help to clear your mind.”

He nodded, leading his wife back to the car so they could talk about it in a safer space. “Honestly, I just didn’t like the way he was acting towards you. He kept touching you and staring at your chest, and he basically lied to you about having clients.”

“Wait, what?” She asked about the last part, not realizing that the story he made up was fake.

“He’s an intern,” Armin explained, telling his wife about all of the duties that he did, none of which involved talking to clients. “Even if his story was true though, I didn’t like the way that he was looking at you at all. It was like you were just a body to him, and you’re so much more than that, baby.”

“Well, thank you for looking out for me, even if I got pissed about it.” She responded, smiling up at him after getting settled in the car.

“That’s not on you though, I get why you were annoyed. You had every right to be.” He took hold of her wrist, running his thumb over the smooth skin of her hand. “I wasn’t in my right mind, and I didn’t like that he looked at you like that.”

“I know, Armin, but it’s over now. Talk to your boss or something about it later, but for now just try not to think about it.” She rested her head against the car headrest, feeling tired from the night. “Plus, I would only ever let you look at me that way, you know that.” She lifted her hand to his neck, rubbing the hair on the back of his head.

He nodded, rubbing his hand on her clothed thigh, expressing his silent devotion towards her. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” She repeated the phrase, kissing him as she continued to touch the strands of hair on his neck.

---

The couple entered their quiet house, hands intertwined as Armin’s wife placed her clutch bag down on the foyer table, making sure to lock the door behind her. The story Armin had said about their dog earlier was fake, as he was already fed and fast asleep in his bed, too tired to even bark at the pair when they came in through the door.

Armin knelt down to help take his wife’s heels off, carefully unbuckling the straps and leaving them neatly by the door after taking his own shoes off. He placed his hands around her face, cupping her jaw as he bent down to kiss her, their lips moving in harmony together.

His wife put her arms once more around his neck, letting Armin pick her up to carry her to the bedroom. “Do you really want this, babe?” He asked, breaking apart the kiss for a moment to speak. She responded with a simple ‘yes’ before kissing him again and letting him place her on the bed. He continued passionately kissing his lover, letting her breathe soft moans into his mouth as hiked her dress up, placing his knee between her thighs to help with the friction of the moment.

“Let me show you that I’m the only person who gets to see you like this, mhm? Just me.”

<3

ok the ending of this was really abrupt bc i didn't feel like making this a whole smut thing at the end so lmk if you want a part 2 :)

bye my lovesssss

<3

[ohmybueckers]

Never Strangers: Chapter Two

Warnings: internalized homophobia, binge drinking, appearance of player!paige (As stated previously this is NOT a reflection of how I believe Paige acts in real life), infidelity, angst y’all i’m sorry

Word Count: 9.5k (i need help)

Authors Note: This is coming out a lil later than I intended … lets just say it was intentional to celebrate Paige’s return and not because I was traveling all day yesterday (literally proofreading this in the airport rn lol). This chapter is told entirely in flashbacks to explain why Maya is crashing out so many years later because oh boy… this one is rough for Paige I’m not gonna lie.

also!! I don’t have a tag list for this fic but if there is enough interest I can consider it!!

December 2019

It had been a full month since that night in the parking lot, and overall not much had changed. They still did all the same activities they always did: drives around town, homework together in their bedrooms, going to the recreation center so Paige could practice her three point shot while Maya studied for this years case. The only difference is that these hangouts would usually end the same way: Paige’s lips on Maya, fingers in brown tresses while Maya trailed hands down Paige’s toned back. They waited until they were in somewhere remotely private, of course (although Maya didn’t know if a car counted as private). 

It always stopped at making out though, usually when both of them were too breathless to talk. Not that Maya necessarily needed more physically - she wasn’t even sure what being ready for that felt like - but she still felt an ache after each time the door shut, either after Paige left her place or when she reentered her home after being dropped off by the blonde. She would be perfectly happy just kissing Paige for the rest of her life if she could just get some answers on what was going on.

She finally got the courage one Wednesday night. Paige was sprawled on her bedroom floor, hardwood made more comfortable by a multicolor rug. Maya laid beside her, close enough to smell the notes of aloe in her hair from her post practice shower. Shutting her AP Chem book (she had an A in the class anyway, being unprepared for one quiz couldn’t hurt that bad), she spoke. “So, what are we doing?”

Paige’s head rose from Catcher in the Rye as if Maya’s voice had startled her, cocking her head a bit. “Hmm?”

Maya exhaled, sitting up from her current position so she had her knees pressed to her chest. Paige followed suit, still lying down but lifting her upper body with her forearms (Maya would be lying if her heart didn’t stop a bit at the sight). “I mean, you’re my best friend. We spend a ton of time together… we do other stuff.” Maya let out a hushed giggle, a sheepish smile spreading on Paige’s face which flushed at the comment. “I don’t do this with my other friends.”

“Not even Maddie from mock trial?” Paige joked, her eyebrows raised. Paige had met Maddie just the past weekend, after Maya brought her to Paige’s game against a school in Saint Paul. In their five minute post-game interaction, Paige had clocked Maddie as one of the straightest girls she had ever met: full Lululemon and Kendra Scott outfit, bleach blonde hair, and a J initial necklace for her baseball player boyfriend. 

“Paige, I’m trying to be serious right now!” Maya exclaimed, her hands reaching her head to hide the smile that was emerging. This was the issue - Paige made it too easy for Maya to relax. So relaxed she almost missed the way her face fell slightly, her teeth meeting her bottom lip.

“No one else knows I’m … gay.” The last word came out as a whisper, perhaps out of fear that someone was right outside of Maya’s door even though Maya’s dad and his girlfriend had been out for hours. “I think they all kinda wonder and I know they’d be cool with it, but ion know if I’m ready to say it yet. I want people to know me as Paige the basketball player, not just for being gay. I got so much I want to accomplish.”

Maya nodded along, her mind running fast to try and digest what Paige was saying. She’s a fixer at heart, always trying to find a way to make people’s problems go away. This just didn’t seem like a situation she could fix. At the end of the day she was talking to Paige Bueckers. The aspect of having that big of a spotlight on you at all times is something she would probably never be able to fully understand.

“Is that okay?” Paige asked, mistaking Maya’s silence for something worse. Maya quickly nodded.

“Yeah, I'm just thinking,” she responded, thinking about her own identity and how it affected how she was approaching the situation. “I don’t know what I am yet. I don’t think I have to know to know that I like you.”

“I like you too.” Paige responded, the blush on her pale cheeks now a lot more prominent.

“Well I’d hope so, since we’ve made out like 50 times.” It was now Maya’s turn to joke, earning an eye roll and a gentle shove from Paige, although it was clear from the adoration in her eyes that her annoyance was nothing more than playful teasing. “So what now?”

“I think we should wait before we call each other girlfriends or anything,” Paige spoke carefully, grabbing Maya’s hand. “But that doesn’t mean I want to stop this. I want this.”

The way Paige was looking at her and feeling how her thumb was drawing circles on the back of her hand made her believe every word she said. There was just one question that was burning in the back of her mind, one she needed an answer to before she could agree. “Are you doing this with anyone else?”

The shake in Paige’s head was immediate, her stare determined. “No. absolutely not, I can’t even think of doing this with anyone that isn’t you. What if… what if we just do what couples do, but we just hold off on the whole labels and public part of it.”

“Like a secret?” Maya’s voice was hardly above a whisper, as though she was already practicing. Paige’s head dipped.

“Well, that makes it sound bad.” She muttered, her voice almost shameful. “I just think it’s best if it’s just for us.”

Maya took a beat, almost deep in thought. Then a hand that wasn’t occupied by Paige’s grip reached out, a finger lifting Paige’s head back up. The smile that was once on Paige’s face returned upon seeing Maya’s expression, a kind smile on as the brunette leaned in so her lips were next to the older girl’s ear. “Lucky for you, I’m good with secrets.”

⎯⎯

January 2020

“Don’t open your eyes yet.” Maya heard Paige remind her as the two of them trudged through the Minnesota snow, which had turned to a bunch of gross white slush. Maya really hoped Paige knew how to navigate after living here her whole life, because she had learned quickly how prone she was to slipping on the icy pavement and her shoe choices were not known for their traction.

“Well, you’re covering them, so I don’t think that really matters.” Maya responded, her hands shoved into the pockets of her tan trench coat for warmth. Finally, they came to a stop. Maya heard a car door open, followed by Paige’s glove covered hands being lifted from her eyes. And she gasped.  

When Paige told her she was taking her on their first official date, she wasn’t sure exactly to expect. She was more than happy doing their usual casual hangout, but Paige was insistent she was going to do something big. And that she did, just two weeks after Christmas and three weeks after their conversation defining what they were.

Paige had somehow turned the back of her car into a full picnic spread, filled with both of their fast food favorites (including Culver’s cheese curds, a food that had become weirdly sentimental to them) as well as a couple of containers filled with her favorite fruits, all placed on top of a red and white checkered blanket. 

Paige scratched the back of her neck, her face flushed (whether it was from being flustered or from the bitter Minnesota cold was a mystery).“I know it’s not like… super fancy or anything. I was gonna do an actual picnic and then I realized we live in Minnesota and it’s fucking cold and…”

Maya wrapped an arm around Paige’s torso, pulling her in for a hug and shutting her up from her fit of rambling.“Paige, it’s perfect.”

Paige melted into the hug, towering over her and yet still seeming uncharacteristically vulnerable in this moment. The two of them crawled into the car, Paige reaching in the front seat carefully as to not bump her head. “I also have these for you.”

Maya would have been perfectly happy with the current setup, but Paige was never one to settle for just good. Because here she sat, a bouquet of tulips in hand with Trader Joes plastic wrap still around them. “You told me these were your favorite once.”

Maya nodded, her smile so big she feared her cheeks would hurt later. She figured the idea of getting flowers from a romantic partner was something made up by Hallmark to sell their movies, having never seen her dad or any of her friends partners give their girls flowers. Clearly it was different when the person you’re seeing is another girl. “I love them.” Maya confirms, offering a peck to her pale cheek. “Never knew you were such a romantic.”

Maya leaned in to properly kiss the blonde while pulling the door shut. She had enough of the winter cold, much preferring to be warmed up by her girl. “You’re not worried about what my dad will say if I come home with flowers?”

“Just hide them in your tote bag before you get to your room.” Paige shrugged, gesturing to the bag Maya brought with: a souvenir from a bookstore in New York years ago. “You know, once we both open about us, Imma get you all the flowers in the world.”

“Oh really?” Maya inquired, already liking the sound of that. “Does that mean I’ll also be able to kiss you in public instead of the back of your car?” 

Paige fakes a pout, gesturing to the very minimal space between their bodies before cupping the younger girl’s face. “Are you saying you don’t want this?”

Maya scoffs. “I never said that,” she says in a whisper, evoking a small hum of approval from the blonde as she pulls her in by her shirt to kiss her.

Maya is pretty sure at this point that she loves Paige, but she knew better than to say it. She could worry about that later. For now she was content lying in the backseat with Paige, unbothered by how cramped this setup actually was in reality. She found when it was just the two of them, nothing else seemed to matter that much.

⎯⎯

“You’ve found yours already?”

The two girls sat side by side on Paige’s bed, one arm of Paige’s around the smaller girl’s shoulders and the other scrolling her own laptop. They were engaging in one of Paige’s least favorite activities: shopping. Correction: she liked shopping typically. She hated dress shopping. 

Perhaps one of the better parts of switching cities, and therefore switching schools, is that Maya now went to a school that allowed both juniors and seniors to go to prom. Though Maya typically leaned towards a more simple style, gravitating towards simple jeans and sweaters, she always looked forward to the opportunity to dress up in a full fancy gown. And here was her dress: a deep plum shade, fitted at the top and flowy at the bottom, with just enough tulle to feel like a prom dress without going overboard. “I think it’s pretty! I like the purple.”

“Mmmm, me too. You’ll look so good in that.” Paige hummed in agreement, leaning in to peck her not-quite-girlfriend’s cheek. “I’m just not really drawn to any of these.” She gestured to her own screen, which featured various dresses from Windsor. 

Maya laughed while resisting the urge to remind Paige that she has looked wildly uncomfortable in every situation she’s been made to wear a dress and that there were alternatives. Perhaps these thoughts were just clouded by Maya’s undeniable urge to see Paige in a suit. 

“It’s not until May. You’ve got time.” Maya decided to drop the topic altogether. They both heard the rushing of water in the pipes in the house, likely from Paige’s dad and stepmom getting ready for bed in the bathroom downstairs. Suddenly remembering that accidentally falling asleep in contacts would not be a smart idea, Maya wove herself out from under Paige’s grasp and walked to where her overnight bag sat on Paige’s cluttered desk. “I still cannot believe your dad let me sleep over the night before your game.”

Paige shrugged “Game’s not til one, I got time. Besides, I told him you’re my good luck charm.” The last comment prompted a sharp turn of the head from Maya, her eyes wide and eyebrows raised. “What?”

“Paige, I love you, but that’s the gayest shit I think you could have said to him.” Maya giggles, mindful enough to keep her voice low. It doesn’t take a super mindful person to see how Paige stopped at this statement, staring at the other girl with wide eyes. Confused, Maya tries to recount what she could have done to spark this reaction. All I said was…

“Oh. Um…”

The room was quiet enough that both girls could hear each others breath clear as day. Hell, Maya was pretty sure if it were summer she would be able to hear the cicadas from outside all the way from here. This wasn’t how she pictured saying it: her fantasies usually saw her and Paige dating for at least two months before they said. Even if she felt it now. Even if she’s pretty sure she’s felt this even before they kissed for the first time. 

“Say it again.”

Her voice broke through the silence, powerful enough to lift Maya’s head from where it had dipped. Paige was sat up, her arms pushing her to a standing position. “Say what again?” Maya asked, her voice wavering as she watched Paige step closer with an unreadable expression.

“The first part.” Another step closer. 

“Paige, lets just drop it.” Maya begged, feeling her eyes begin to water a bit with embarrassment. Naturally this whole thing had to come to an end at some point - she wasn’t lovesick enough to believe that a high school fling would last forever. She just wished it wouldn’t be this soon, all because of a slip of tongue. 

“Please.” Paige’s voice was hushed, yet firm as she planted herself right in front of the other girl, her height towering over. The lack of space made Maya feel short of breath - being near Paige had that effect on her. Especially when she looked at her the way she was now, as if she was hungry for every word she spoke. 

“I love you.” It comes out more as a question, even though it was one of the things Maya was most sure of in that moment. She watched Paige’s expression, which did not seem nearly as scared as she had been envisioning. “I didn’t even know I was saying it, you don’t have to say it back-”

The end of the sentence was soon lost to a fierce kiss, Paige grabbing both sides of her face as if she could slip away at any moment, yet still gentle as though Maya was the most precious thing on this earth. Through her shock, Maya’s reflexes acted quick enough to place a hand on Paige’s chest, positioning herself on the tips of her toes to give Paige easier access. Paige broke the kiss, still close enough that Maya could feel every breath as the other girl put their foreheads together.

“I love you.” Paige said softly, a shy smile on her lips. Her thumb moved to wipe the one tear that had escaped Maya’s eyes away, before kissing where it once was. “I love you, I love you, I love you,” she repeated, kissing a new area of her face after each affirmation before returning back to her lips. 

⎯⎯

February 2020

Maya had been given the opportunity to watch Paige play basketball numerous times before, but there was something especially special about watching her play at her school. Perhaps it made her a traitor, but she loved cheering her girl on with the Bueckers family from the bleachers, watching the student section chant about how “overrated” she is (as if the game was even close).

Hopkins secured a near 30 point win, an event well worthy of celebration. Maya stood back as Paige made her way out of the locker room, allowing her to greet and hug them before turning to her. Paige after a good game was one of Maya’s favorite versions of her; there was something about the tired yet confident grin on her face as she made strides towards her, wrapping her in a big hug.

“Great job P,” Maya’s compliment was muffled by her position against Paige’s chest. They pulled away, very aware of the blonde’s family nearby, but Paige’s smile was unmistakably smitten. Thankfully, her dad and stepmom seemed to be fairly oblivious, and if they weren’t they didn’t show it. 

“Paige, that last assist was incredible.” A voice appeared from behind them, followed by the strong scent of vanilla perfume mixed with Old Spice deodorant. A body weaved themselves between the two girls, and Maya immediately knew who it was: Paige’s teammate Jaz.

Jaz was beautiful, she couldn’t deny it. Long, impossibly silky black hair was put up in a ponytail that looked messy enough to appear effortless, but not sloppy. Her Hopkins jersey had been replaced by baggy gray sweats and a red tank that paired well with her warm skin. She would probably appreciate this beauty a lot more if it wasn’t incredibly obvious that Jaz was obsessed with Paige, her efforts to flirt obvious to everyone except the subject of Jaz’s adoration.

“Thank you Jaz. You did a great job too,” Paige grinned back, her compliment as general as possible. Though Jaz was definitely not a bad player typically, her shot was most certainly off in this game (not that Maya was paying attention to that or anything). Still, the other girl beamed.

“Are you going with the team to Chik-fil-a?” She asked, her hand grazing Paige’s back. “I got my car with me, I can give you a ride if you need?”

Good God, she couldn’t be more obvious if she tried, Maya thought as she watched Paige shake her head and stepped slightly to the side, away from her touch.“I think I’m going with my family and Maya out to dinner,” At the mention of her name, Paige gestured towards the shorter girl prompting Jaz to turn around. “Jaz, this is my friend Maya.”

That was maybe the first time Maya had been remotely bothered by being referred to as Paige’s friend, even if that’s technically what they still were. It felt like fuel for Jaz, as if Paige was free to be hit on. 

Jaz looked at Maya as if she had just appeared and hadn’t been standing here this entire time. One perfectly shaped eyebrow quirked up, her hand reaching out to touch Maya’s shoulder. “It’s so nice to meet you! You are stunning! Paige, why did you never tell me your friend was so pretty!”

Maya smiled at the compliment, although something in her tone felt like it wasn’t entirely genuine. Maya convinced herself that she was just being bitter, swallowing her ill feelings and mustering a perky, “Thank you, you played great.” 

Jaz gave a closed lipped smile in return before returning to Paige. “Well I gotta go, but I’ll see you in practice tomorrow right?”

It was only when the two of them began their dark and cold walk to the senior parking lot that Maya brought it up. “She was totally flirting with you.” The brunette stated, her tone matter-of-fact and somewhat teasing.

“What, Jaz?” Paige appeared shocked, an emotion that Maya found incredibly hard to believe considering the performance the girl just put on. “Nah, ion think so.”

“That was incredible, Paige. You’re so great.” Maya gushed in an airy voice. Sure, it sounded nothing like Jaz, but it was fun. “It’s fine, I just think it’s funny.”

Paige smirked, cocking her head slightly. “Really? You sound a little jealous.”

“Me? No way.” Maya said. She never considered herself the jealous type - she still wouldn’t, despite the small twinge of annoyance seeing Jaz constantly hit on Paige. It’s not like it was the other girl’s fault - Paige appears to be completely available. “Hey, I would do the same thing if I were her.”

“You did.” Paige reminded, scanning the parking lot quickly to ensure it had cleared out as much as she believed before wrapping an arm around the other girl and leaning close enough for only the two of them to hear. “And for the record, you have absolutely nothing to worry about. I’m kinda crazy about you, sweet girl.”

Maya felt her face get hot. Deep down, she knew that Paige was hers. She was not the jealous type. 

At least that’s what she told herself over and over on the way to the car and to the restaurant. 

⎯⎯

Post game meals with Paige were always celebratory - Hopkins did have an undefeated season after all. While Paige didn’t celebrate with her family and Maya after every game, she did often enough for Maya to expect the blonde to be in good spirits. Until one game in mid February. 

“Coach tore into me about missing some rebounds.” Paige grumbled, her posture slouched in the Chipotle booth as she picked at her burrito bowl. “Went on and on about how that won’t go too well for me at UConn.”

Maybe it’s because Maya didn’t fully understand basketball, but this was absurd to her. I mean, Hopkins still won - the game was just a little closer than any of them would have liked. However, she knew she would never completely understand. She knew all there was to say was “I’m sorry.” 

“No, she’s right,” Paige muttered, eyes not meeting Maya’s kind ones.

“It was one rough game, P. You still won. You just gotta do what you’ve always done - learn from your mistakes and grow,” her dad chimed in from his spot next to Maya. Drew, Paige’s little brother, was seemingly too interested in his quesadilla to care about this discussion. 

“I just gotta be better.” Paige shook her head, her eyes fueled with intensity.

“You’ve always bounced back, P. You got this.” Maya encouraged, hoping that Paige had reached a point of acceptance with the day’s events. 

Little did she know what would follow.

March 2020

It only took two days after that game for Paige to begin forgetting texts. Maya didn’t think too much of it at first, chalking it up to her basketball practices ramping up as the team prepared for the State Tournament. A slightly longer response time was no issue worth sweating over.

But then Paige stopped reaching out how she usually did. She no longer asked Maya to run stupid errands with her, even if that was the only time she had in a days stretch to see her. And every time Maya would ask if she could watch Paige shoot, or if they could do homework together, it was met with some form of an excuse. 

“Yeah, I’ve just been a little busier lately, that’s all.”

Maya sighed as Paige gave an excuse over their phone call that she had heard too many times at this point. A month ago, she could have never pictured Paige declining plans with her without offering an alternate time. Now, Maya felt like a pathetic fangirl with the way she always had to reach out to Paige, trying to find cracks in her schedule. Sure, she knew that Paige had a state championship to prepare for, but basketball had never completely stopped the two of them from seeing each other before. It had been nearly two weeks since she had seen even a glimpse of the blonde, and she felt like she was going crazy trying to decide if she was just being overly clingy or if her suspicions were correct. 

“You’d tell me if something was wrong, right?” Maya asked, searching desperately for any semblance of reassurance. She heard Paige sigh through the phone, a sound that tightened the knot that had been woven in her stomach for days now. 

“Nothing is wrong.” Paige replied, her tone not entirely convincing, before adding, “How about I take you to the movies on Sunday night?”

Ok, now we’re getting somewhere, Maya thought. “Ok yeah, I’d like that. Pick me up at 5?”

“Of course.” Maya swore she could hear a small smile. “I gotta go, but I’ll text you.”

The call dropped, Maya staring at the lock screen on her phone: A collage of recent photos: some included friends from home, some included family (including one photo of her and her parents together that she could never bring herself to delete). Many of them included Paige, a collection of candid shots of the basketball star as well as photos Bob Bueckers had taken post games. She stared at the way Paige leaned towards her, their bodies fitting together like a puzzle piece, a small sign to them that they belonged to each other even if nobody else knew it. A small rush of comfort flooded her system as she was reminded that this Paige, the one in the photos, would never dream of hurting her. 

⎯⎯

Maya stood on the sidewalk for five minutes before the text came. 

Paige: sum teammates wanted to run some drills tonight to prep for this weeks game. i gotta miss tonight. so sorry.

Maya wanted nothing more than to throw her phone on the freezing cold asphalt and scream. In her eye she had every right to, because come on. She trusted the other girl wouldn’t dare to cancel plans like this, especially ten minutes after they were supposed to begin in the first place. 

But Maya felt as though there was no point in cursing the blonde out. It was basketball, after all. Loving Paige Bueckers was knowing that her love of basketball would often, if not always, have to come first. Maya was fine with it. She had to be. At least according to the “No worries! Have a good practice!” text she sent back. Though she tried her best to come off cool and collected to the blonde, inside she felt as though there was something behind the scenes, and that she was being made the fool.

⎯⎯

She finally saw Paige again on Thursday night, the basketball player coming over to do some homework together. As Maya’s dad and his girlfriend were out of the house, this then evolved to them sitting in the living room, a news story about the coronavirus spreading across the United States on in the background. Paige paid it no mind, finding comfort in TikTok instead of the girl right next to her on the couch. Though the blonde offered her a couple of chaste kisses, she had still seemed distant. It was killing Maya. 

“Can’t listen to that anymore.” Maya sighs, shutting off the TV altogether after a newscaster predicts that the incoming “two week quarantine” would not end that quickly. Paige doesn’t move, still staring at her phone. Maya observed her, wishing the small gap between them didn’t seem so massive in that moment. “I heard that Ella is throwing a party tomorrow night. Some sort of weird, lets see each other one more time before covid destroys our lives party. Are you going?”

Truthfully, Maya hated big high school parties, feeling as though they never matched up to expectations. Besides, they now remind her of the weeks following her parents separation, where she would go out and get blackout drunk with her friends around Boston. These were times she wished to forget.

However, she knew that Paige enjoyed them when they fit around her basketball obligations. So when Ella, a girl at Maya’s school with many connections to Hopkins students, announced she was hosting Maya jumped at the opportunity to mention it to the other girl. Surely she wouldn’t turn it down, not after the state championship got cancelled. 

“I think I’m missing it.” Paige looked up, her eyes seemingly too engrossed in the art on Maya’s wall (the same art they’ve had up since they moved in almost a year ago) to make eye contact with the other girl. “Dad’s too worried about me going out with everything going on and basketball on the line, so…”

Maya nods, although her heart twinges a little bit with an emotion she struggles to identify. Logically, this explanation made sense. However, with the events of the past month, Maya was just so tired of even trying to change Paige’s mind at this point. “Makes sense.” She muttered, the two of them going back to their respective tasks. They were together physically, but Maya had never felt so far apart from her.

⎯⎯

Bodies filled the basement of Ella’s basement slowly but surely, the overhead lights allowing purple LED lights to take it’s place illuminating the room. Maya stood close to the bar area, sipping slowly on a mango white claw. Judging by the way she winced after each sip, this was not her typical drink of choice. However, Maddie had insisted she stop taking shots of cheap liquor after throwing back three within 10 minutes less than thirty minutes ago. “I love you Maya, but I do not want to have to drag your ass back home if you black out,” Maddie said sternly as she handed her the white claw.

Now, as Maya still had a fourth of her drink left, she was thankful for the interference. Spending the next two weeks stuck in the house already seemed nightmarish enough, she couldn’t imagine how the first day would go with a hangover. At least she was still drinking something - perhaps it wasn’t the healthiest coping mechanism, but she felt as though the alcohol was her one relief from the pain Paige was putting her through. Though Maya stood by her dislike of house parties, she was glad to attend this one.

That is until the side door across the room opened once more. Maya tried to listen to the story Maddie was telling her about how her boyfriend’s friends sucked as some song she had definitely heard on Tiktok blared through the speakers, but her other senses disappeared as soon as she saw a ponytail of blonde hair, followed by an all-too-familiar deep voice shouting, “Alright, who’s ready to get fucked up!”

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me,” Maya muttered.

It’s actually comical how every time Paige walked in a room every set of eyes seemed to be immediately drawn to hers, including Maya’s. She stood near the door, dressed in a hoodie and jeans and holding a red solo close to her. She laughed along with one of her teammates as one of them cracked a joke, and Maya couldn’t help but grip her White Claw when she realized that Jaz was right next to her, looking at her instead of the person who actually made the joke.

Maddie, confused as to why her friend stopped listening to her story, followed her eyes to the crowd of basketball players. “Paige? Didn’t you say she wasn’t coming.”

Maya’s lips pursed. “She wasn’t. I guess she changed her mind.” She would never in a million years tell Maddie the truth of why she was angry with Paige right now, no matter how bad she wanted to. If it meant not outing Paige, she was fine simmering in her rage alone. 

The weight of two sets of eyes seemed to reach the blonde, because she turned towards the bar before either one could look away. Her eyes met Maya’s quickly, her previous drunken smile gone and a flash of something else on her face immediately - perhaps guilt? Maya broke the staring competition first, setting her drink down and reaching for her purse on the counter as she noted Paige walking towards her out of the corner of her eye. Shit. 

“I just need a minute.” She hastily called out to Maddie, already making a beeline towards the stairs in search of a quieter place to collect herself. She ignores the calls from the host Ella and her own circle of friends as they tell her to stay downstairs, them shutting up on their own as they watch her pass by not with a look of nausea, but with her face flushed and nose scrunched as she holds back tears with all the strength in her. Finally, she finds a bathroom, pulling the door shut before allowing herself to fall apart. 

The first tear drops, hot and heavy on her arm. Her reflection in the mirror looks so helpless, like a deer that has been shot. She hates it, having watched her friends back home go through the same thing and telling herself she would never act like that over someone. But that was before the divorce. That was before the move. That was before Paige. 

Wanting to avoid wiping her eyes in fear of smearing her mascara, she leaned her head down over the porcelain white sink, her arms supporting her as she allowed the tears to continue falling one by one. She didn’t understand why Paige would lie about this. If she couldn’t stand being around her at a crowded party with her teammates, it spoke volumes on where they stood when it was just the two of them. 

A sharp knock at the door interrupted her train of thought, her head lifting. “I’m fine, Maddie.”

“It’s Paige, open up.”

Maya scoffed hearing the determination in Paige’s voice, as if Maya owed her anything. “So funny how your dad changed his mind so fast.”

“Maya, please.” Paige’s volume raised slightly, just a little more desperate. And as much as Maya wanted to ignore Paige like the blonde had for the past few weeks, a part of her wanted an explanation too much to be petty. She gripped the handle, throwing it open. She was greeted by Paige standing there, hands shoved in the pockets of her black joggers. She took one glance at Maya’s bloodshot eyes, tired of fighting the tears pricking at them, and barged into the way too small bathroom, shutting the door behind them.

“What the fuck, Paige.” Maya spewed, her gaze intense. Of course, this would be the exact moment she began to feel the effects of the shots she had taken earlier in the night. At least there was a toilet right behind her if she needed to throw up, which she thought was a real possibility in that moment, just not from alcohol. 

Paige looks away, eyes focusing on the white shower curtain that appeared yellow in the poor bathroom lighting. “I know this looks bad…”

“Looks bad?” Maya laughed, her eyes wide. She knew she looked fucking manic, and she really couldn’t bring herself to care. “You lied to me, Paige. I think you’ve been lying to me for a while. Do you think I haven’t noticed how you’ve been pulling away from me?”

Paige fidgeted with the bottom of her black hoodie. “I just had so much going on with basketball, and other people aren’t making it easy on me. I told you, I wanted to make a name for myself before I came out, and then you told me you loved me.”

The last sentence made the brunettes heart drop, her feigned amused expression replaced by something much darker. “No,” Maya’s voice was hardly above a hoarse whisper, the words replaying in her mind. As if all of this was her fault, just because she had the audacity to fall in love. “You are not turning this on me right now.”

Paige’s hand made a fist as her eyes shut for a moment, appearing to hold back her frustration before making actual eye contact for the first time in their conversation. “Everything just started feeling so serious and I got scared. I’m scared.”

Maya heard the way her voice broke at the last two words, and in any other situation she would have done anything to comfort her. A part of her still wanted to.“You said it back, I said you didn’t have to.”

“I wanted to.” Paige clarified, though her previous eye contact wavered. “Everything is just a lot right now, and I’m worried I’ll never be able to give you what you need.”

“I’m not asking you to make me your girlfriend right now, Paige.” Maya forced herself to quiet down, afraid that Ella and her friends could be within earshot of the bathroom and not trusting the quality of her walls enough. “I’m asking you to talk to me, to not cancel on me last minute and make up some bullshit excuse.”

“It was not bullshit.” Now it’s Paige’s turn to raise her voice, something she had never done to her before. She threw her hands in the air, and they made their way to the top of her head. “You were the one who’s been weird about us being private, acting like it’s not enough.”

“Because you haven’t been treating us like we’re private, Paige. You’ve been treating us like a secret.”

“You said you were good with secrets.” Paige defended, though unless Maya was just seeing what she wanted to see there was a sliver of guilt that crossed her expression as well. 

“Not when I become one!” Maya couldn’t help but get flashbacks to their first conversation about labels - at the time, exclusive friends with benefits seemed like a great idea. Now? Not so much. “I get if you don’t want people to know about us, but lately its like you don’t even want people to know we’re friends.”

“That’s not true!”

“Then why can’t we hang out like we used to?” Paige’s mouth opened, but no noise came out. She had finally made the Paige Bueckers speechless, just not in the way she hoped. 

“I still want you, I promise.” Paige answered, the actual question left ignored. It felt like every bit of patience Maya had for Paige had been chipped away by this conversation, and this sentence was the final blow.

“You should act like it then.” Everything in the room, from the glare of the lights to the presence of the girl in front of her, was suddenly too much, and she felt herself fall so her back was supported by the sink, her arms supporting her. “Can you please just give me some space right now?”

“Maya, please can I just…” There were tears beginning to form in Paige’s eyes, tears Maya couldn’t see from where her eyes were trained on the tile beneath them.

“Just go.” Maya’s voice was flat, a low edge to it as she willed the room to stop spinning. From the haze, she heard a sigh, felt a body move past her, and felt the draft as the bathroom door opened and shut immediately after. 

It was the longest conversation her and Paige had in over a week, and yet she had never felt like she knew her less. 

Her short trip to the bathroom ended up lasting about 10 more minutes after Paige left as she tried to regulate her breathing. She hated herself for how her brain seemed to go back to fixating on the way Paige sounded when she said “I still want you”, even though her actions had made her feel the opposite. 

She was tired, and being tired meant being delusional. She needed to go back home and sleep. Or she needed more alcohol. One of the two. After fixing her makeup the best to her ability with only water, she opened the door, greeted with the faint sound of Drake from the basement. However, in her hurry to get out of the bathroom, she found herself going down the wrong end of the hallway, towards the master bedroom which Ella announced earlier was firmly off limits instead of the set of stairs. 

She was more than willing to correct her mistake upon realizing until she heard a giggle, followed by a familiar sickly sweet voice say, “Paige, look at me.”

At this point the name Paige was like a magnet to Maya, always drawing her attention no matter what, although her heart dropped at the way it came out of the girl’s mouth. Against her better judgement, she took a step towards the door, which was cracked so it was half open. She had to crane her head to see the full picture, but the second she did she sincerely wished she had just turned around.

Paige and Jaz sat on one side of the bed, backs turned so she could only make out some movements. If Jaz was already beautiful when sweaty and tired after a game, she was absolutely radiant now - her skin glistened under a silver sparkly top, her jeans flattering her tall frame perfectly even when sitting.

Jaz wore her dark hair down, yet Maya could still see how her eyes closed partially in bliss as she leaned in closer and closer to Paige’s face like a prey that just caught her target, brushing a hair that escaped her ponytail out of her face and purring, “I’ve been wanting this for a long time. You know I have.”

Maya felt the whole world stop. She couldn’t think about much, all she knew was she had to go. 

Her head pounded as she raced back down the hallway away from the bedroom, no longer attempting to hold back the tears that had been threatening her. She wasn’t quite sure if it was from the alcohol or her crying, but she knew that she needed to get out of that house now. 

Scanning the basement through watery eyes, she quickly found Maddie, whose planned angry words about how Maya abandoned her were thrown away as she saw the poor girl. Pulling her by the arm, Maddie weaved her way through (perks of having tall friends), Maya stumbling behind. She could feel the bass of the music course through her body, yet the lyrics fell on deaf ears. All she could focus on were broken promises, promises that clearly should have never been made.

She would forever owe Maddie after this night. She owed her for ordering them an Uber, ushering her in as they escaped the brutality of Minnesota winter and hurt feelings. She especially owed her for not asking questions, simply looking at her with a look of concern, yet understanding. Maddie may be the straightest person she’s ever met, but the girl wasn’t stupid.

On the other hand Maya, despite her GPA and PSAT score to prove the contrary, had never felt more idiotic in her life. She replayed every chapter of her and Paige, trying to discover when and how she had missed the signs that Paige was chasing Jaz while being with her. 

Her phone buzzed five times in rapid succession, each one bringing a new pulse to her head. Lowering her brightness, she checked. 

Paige: where did you go

Paige: please can we just talk

Paige: i fucked up so bad

Paige: i don’t want this to be the end of us

Paige: i love you so much Maya

She choked back a sob as she read the last message, old photos of her and Paige still staring at her as she read the texts piled on her lockscreen. It felt like they were taunting her, a harsh reminder of what she came so close to having. She wanted to believe Paige when she said she loved her, she really did. But at this point, she had run out of excuses for her. She typed back a simple, Saw you with Jaz. 

Paige: what did you see

The Uber stopped outside Maya’s house, giving her time to think of a reply as she thanked the driver and stepped towards her front door, thankful that her dad seemed to be asleep and that she wouldn’t have to answer any questions for now. 

It was only after she somehow made her way to her bed, not bothering to take off her clothes for the night (that was a tomorrow problem), that she typed out, Enough to know that I really don’t want to see you, and pressed send. 

And for the first time since Maya had met Paige, that statement was true. 

⎯⎯

April 2020

Maya found it funny how the usually wholesome streets of the Minneapolis suburbs could feel so eerie. It had been two weeks into quarantine (which now had no end in sight), and the city had quickly fallen into some sort of routine in the chaos - online school during the day, DIY projects and Netflix at night, with some cautious walks sprinkled in. Now it was approaching 6:30pm, the sun preparing to set, and Maya was alone as she approached the tall figure waiting for her at the park.

“I can’t stay long. It took me forever to convince my dad to let me leave in the first place.”

Paige perked at the sound of her, turning around to face the girl. Her hair was lightly tossed by the wind as she took one careful step towards the girl, as if she were a deer and not someone who she used to sing love songs in the car with.

“I just need enough time to explain.” Paige began, staring at Maya for permission to begin speaking. Maya gave this to her in the form of a gentle nod. “I get why you’re upset. I would be upset too. What you saw on Friday … that wasn’t as bad as it looked. Jaz saw me leave the bathroom, and she said I looked upset. So she pulled me into that bedroom and um… she knows about us. I guess we weren’t that subtle.” Paige laughs at the end, though it’s clear to Maya that she finds nothing about what she said funny.

“Okay.” Maya says, “So how did you go from that to that?”

“I told her what I did and um…” Paige inhales, looking up towards the sky for a moment where a bird is soaring above her, “She started saying that maybe I should be with someone who understands the pressure of basketball better.”

Ouch.

“And then she said that she understood me and all this stuff. And then she leaned in, and um, I’m pretty sure that’s what you saw. But I need you to believe me when I say nothing else happened. I couldn’t do it, couldn’t kiss her knowing what I feel for you.”

In Maya’s heart, she knew that Paige had to at least be telling some version of the truth. For the past couple of weeks, her phone had received probably around 15 different texts from the other girl, practically begging Maya to say anything to her, even if it meant getting cussed out again. Maya finally decided that it was more worth it to get some form of closure than to ignore Paige and remain unaware of why she would do this all to her. Paige immediately agreed when she suggested they meet at a park only a few blocks down from Maya’s place, even if it meant Paige had to drive to the confrontation. 

Maya’s firm stance against Paige faltered especially after seeing the look in her blue eyes, that wide eyed look as if she was the only thing she cared about seeing. But then she remembered that night, her converse clad feet planted on the hardwood as she watched Jaz lean closer with a determined look, and she remembered how she couldn’t see Paige’s face. For all she knew, Paige had given the same look of adoration to the other girl as well.

“I want to believe you,” Maya’s voice is soft, providing some relief to the tension in Paige’s face. “But I just can’t right now. Not when you lied to me about going to that party in the first place.”

Paige’s head dipped, her voice dripping with guilt as she spoke, “I fucked up, I know, but I swear that wasn’t the reason.”

“Then what was it?” Maya asks, a surprising level of calmness in her voice. Paige failed to respond, her upper lip biting down as her eyes began to water slightly. “I thought that as your best friend, you would care about me enough to tell me if you wanted to stop this.”

“Maya, I never wanted to end this.” Paige interjects, stepping closer. 

“I didn’t either. I still don’t.” Maya replies, her volume higher now. She takes a deep breath, taking a moment to shut her eyes to prevent her emotions from overcoming her. “But maybe now I have to.”

The look in Paige’s eyes would come to haunt Maya for years down the line: one of anguish, the sting in her eyes escalating rapidly. “What?” Paige’s voice was hoarse, before escalating in desperation, her hand reaching for the younger girls, “Maya, please don’t do this.”

Maya shoved her hands in her pockets. “You’re going off to UConn next year, and I’ll still be here. and I don’t know if I trust you enough to not do something while you’re there.”

Paige blinked a few times, her expression confused, then angry, appearing not unlike she did when arguing with the referees at her games. “Maya, I didn’t do anything with her. I didn’t do anything wrong. You kinda need to be in a relationship in the first place to cheat.”

The last sentence hit like a blow to the chest, Maya taking a step back as if she had been physically shoved by the venom in Paige’s tone. Any form of reassurance they had given each other, all of the promises that it was just them, came back to taunt in her. Because what was so real to Maya was clearly just fun for Paige. Guilt immediately rushed back through Paige’s expression, her eyes horrified at what she just said, but it was too late.

“Nice to know this was all nothing for you,” Maya’s voice was cool as she nodded sarcastically, beginning to walk backwards in the direction of her house. Her eyes never left Paige, even as the blonde girl continued stepping forward to follow her.

“Maya, I didn’t mean that.”

“But you said it.” Maya’s voice remained calm. Inside she was fuming, but she found that when she spoke she no longer had the same angry energy she did that night at the party. If she’s going to try to make me feel like shit, so will I, Maya decided bitterly. “I found out my dad cheated on my mom that weekend. The day after the party”

Another beat of silence. “What?” Maya scanned Paige’s face, watching her defensiveness mold into horror. Upon further inspection, Maya noted how Paige’s eyes looked especially tired, dark circles forming like clouds underneath them. “Maya, what are you-.”

“I called my mom because I was stressed about this whole COVID thing, was worried about my trip in April being cancelled. I asked her to visit me in Minnesota, and she said she couldn’t, and she wouldn’t tell me why until I begged.” Maya stared off, thinking about the way her mother, who she had never seen cry despite encouraging her daughter to embrace her emotions, had sounded so wounded as she explained why the divorce happened. It left an impossibly bitter taste on her tongue. “My dad started seeing his girlfriend two months before they broke up. She never told me until now to protect him. I don’t know if she ever would have.”

“I’m so sorry, Maya.” Paige’s voice cracked, speaking in a hushed voice as if speaking any louder would shatter the other girl. “Ion know what to say.”

Maya couldn’t help but roll her eyes, because of course she didn’t know what to say. “So I’m sorry if what you did to me is a little fresh right now.”

“Wait.” Paige called as Maya backed up, her regret evident. 

“Can you please give me some space, Paige?” Maya is ashamed at how her voice breaks, her effort to remain strong through this conversation now all for nothing. Faking a cough, she muttered, “I think you’ve hurt me enough.” 

She began to walk away when she heard her speak again. “I’m going to Maryland next week,” Paige said, her tone matter of fact. “Quarantining with Azzi for a bit.”

Paige had spoken about Azzi Fudd to Maya before, explaining just how similar they were and telling her that “Azzi will love you”, as if it was a given that the two would meet. She’s unsure if Paige would make such a statement at the moment. She knew the two of them were close, but quarantining together? Across the state?

“For how long?” Maya asked.

“It’s going to be at least a couple of weeks, maybe a month? I’m not sure.” A month? It’s not like she particularly wanted to see Paige right now, and there’s no reason Paige would go out of her way to tell her, but still. To hear Paige say it so matter of fact after everything they went through, as if she was the last to know, stung a bit in a way she was not anticipating. “I want to see you before I leave for UConn.”

Paige looked at her as if she wanted to ask if she wanted that too, but was too afraid of the answer. In a way, this reminded Maya of the first night they met; both unsure of how to talk to each other, exchanging stiff words and stares at the dinner table instead. Except now everything had changed.

With a small smile, Maya shrugged, “Anything’s possible.” 

The buzz of her phone in her hand took her out of the moment, a reminder from her dad that they agreed on her being home by 7 (as if all COVID germs died after sundown). She shivered, her body numb not by the temperature but the prospect of what she was about to do. She took one last look at Paige; the way her blue UConn long sleeve paired with her blonde hair, her lanky figure that one fit perfectly with her shorter one, and those damn eyes.

“My dad says I need to get back home. Thank you for meeting me here. I, um, I hope you have a safe trip.”

She turned her back quick enough so that Paige couldn’t see the tears beginning to pour, beginning the 10 minute walk back to her home surrounded by the whistle of the wind and the setting sun. Something about it felt so final, like this would be the last time she would see Paige for a long, long while. Maybe ever.

⎯⎯

Paige stayed in Maryland for three months. Maya hadn’t even known she returned to the suburbs until she was already gone, posting stories from her first week at UConn. Not a text. Not a single word. The younger girl decided to mute Paige’s posts and stories at the end of the year, realizing that nothing good could come out of seeing the other girl supposedly live her best life at her dream school while she was stuck at home. Maybe Paige would reach out on breaks, and then Maya could reassess the situation.

She didn’t.

Quarantine was rough on her already, her house in suburbia not nearly as picture perfect as it seemed. She could barely look at her dad, using any excuse to leave dinners early or get out of “family activities” altogether (she refused to acknowledge Jenn as a part of her family).  She hated how this curse put on women in her family kept following her. It was in the way she was now quarantined with her fathers affair partner, the same one he had been dropping hints about wanting to marry. It was in the way her mother pleaded with her on the phone to please not let this affect her relationship with her father, though how could it not?

The knife was dug deeper when she passed the prom dress collecting dust in her closet, remembering cheek kisses and hands brushing her shoulder like she was still in Paige’s bed buying it with her. When she began making grocery runs again, she had to make an effort to avoid glancing at the wall of flowers, as doing so would cause her eyes to prick with tears. Hell, she even had to remove multiple songs from her playlists, because of course they had to share the same taste. Songs that she had loved for years were now practically unlistenable. 

Everything was a reminder of how she had done everything right, and yet she was somehow still not enough. Maybe she never would be. 

[armxnh]

Hii!! Uh I'm not sure if you accept requests rn. If not, you can delete this. If you do, I was thinking if you could write more Vinny's sister reader x Wooin?👀

get a room- or better get out

( wooin yoo ) suggestive!

ever since your brother found out about your relationship with wooin, it had become nearly impossible for the two of you to share a moment alone without vinny inserting himself into the plans and promptly ruining them

even when you tried to sneak away with a flimsy excuse—grocery run, casual walk—he insisted on tagging along "for your safety."

so, it wasn't surprising when wooin showed up to your new place—the apartment vinny somehow managed to afford despite your confusion over his finances—the second you told him your brother had off to who-knows-where.

which brought you to your current situation.

you were sprawled across the couch, the show you'd been watching now a distant memory, with your boyfriend tangled on top of you, his hands mapping every inch of your body. your hair was a mess, lips swollen from the constant kissing—you looked a little wild, and absolutely stunning.

making out with him was always sloppy, a breathless mess, like he couldn't afford to waste a single second with you. and really he couldn't—it had been two weeks since he'd seen your in person, thanks to your brother's constant presence. he was just making up for lost time.

neither of you planned to stop unless someone passed out from lack of air, but that was part of the thrill—wooin's words, not yours.

"god, i missed you" he panted, pulling away just enough to hover over your face. his half-lidded eyes, messy hair, and flushed cheeks made it easy to argue that he was the one who looked pretty right now.

but you didn't waste a second. you grabbed him by the collar and pulled him right back in, wooin pressed you further into the couch, hands locking with yours, pinning them beside your head like he never wanted to let go.

when it was your turn to take a breather, you gasped against his mouth, trying to pull back for air. but wooin wouldn't let you—he clung to you like he might disappear if he did.

"w-wooin- baby hah— what are you-"

"i need you so bad," he whispered breathlessly, "i can't—"

"am i interrupting?"

the voice sent a shock through your entire body.

you shoved wooin off of you with strength you didn't know you had, sitting up straight just to see your younger brother standing in the doorway. wooin scrambled, grabbing the nearest pillow and shoving it over his lad, looking at vinny like he's just been caught red-handed. which, to be fair, he had.

for someone usually so confident, wooin suddenly looked very small under vinny's icy glare.

"vinny—! you said you were staying out late tonight," you blurted, hoping to cool the tension.

"that was the plan." vinny said, eyes flicking to the hickey blooming of your neck,"good thing i came back early or you two would've been halfway to third base—which, by the way," he turned to wooin, "if i lift that pillow and see a boner, you're loosing the ability to feel down there. got it?"

"i-"

"vinny, i'm older than you!" you cut off wooin, rising to your feet. "i can do what i want with my boyfriend. it's not of your—"

"oh, so you have hit third base?" vinny's gaze turned deadly, boring wholes into wooin's soul. "you really have a dead wish, huh?"

"vinny. that's enough."

now, vinny wasn't exactly afraid of you. but he had seen you knock out a kid twice your size for mocking his hair color. he'd also witnessed you sending three girls to the hospital after they laughed at a necklace he made you for your birthday.

so no, he wasn't scared. he was terrified.

you stood your ground, eyes blazing, while vinny silently took a seat next to wooin—who, by now, looked like he was reconsidering every life decision that brought him to this couch. he clutched the pillow like it was a lifeline. honestly, you looked so hot when you were mad.

"i don't care if you guys hate each other, " you said, your voice sharp and clear, "hell, i don't want you to be best friends—but you will respect each other," you finished, eyes locked on vinny's.

vinny clicked his tongue, leaning back against the couch like he was trying not to flinch under your stare, "fine," he grumbled, arms crossed. "but if i hear anything, and i mean anything weird—squeaky springs, muffled moans, bedframe hitting the wall-"

"vinny!" you shouted, face flushed with embarrassment while wooin smirked slightly at the thought.

vinny shrugged, clearly unfazed, "i'm just saying. these walls are thin, and i like to sleep in peace."

"we get it," you pinched the bridge of your nose.

vinny eyes wooin for a second too long before sighing dramatically, "ugh. whatever. i'm going to my room. don't touch each other until i close the door, or so help me—"

"vinny-"

"can't promise you that, so you better hurry up," wooin stood, dropping the pillow, regaining his lost confidence, as he pulled you closer to him, lips against your warm cheek, eyes never leaving vinny.

that bastard.

vinny stood, retreated down the alley, and when he was out of sight, wooin buried his face in your shoulder.

"are you okay?"

"i'm fine- he might kill me next time we race but i'm fine." wooin joked, earning a laugh from you.

"next time, we'll lock every door." you press a kiss on his temple.

woon chuckled, "next time we book a hotel."

and somewhere, behind his bedroom door, vinny gagged.

ⓒarmxnh