#need help because they’re worried about how it’ll affect me

[woe-is-corvus]

I don’t want to wilt and wither at the end of that driveway again, flimsy sweater trying to keep me from getting sick in the rain and the snow, i just don’t want to fuck up again

[admirationandromantics]

Stress-reliever

Okay, so another request! I really like this one, and I had a lot of fun writing it too. Sorry it took so long, but I try to work at an acceptable pace. Anyways, this story is about reader having an assignment and being hella stressed because she can't understand anything. Josh, her friend, comes over because she doesn't answer any of his texts or calls and gets worried about how hard she's pushing herself. And he knows the best way for her to relax...

Word count: 3k (Unedited)

I let out a silent scream, slamming my fist into the book. Goodness sake, why was this so difficult? I look at my word count, and it’s nowhere near finished. I don’t even have a good point I’m writing about. Everything I’ve written before this has been great, or at least good. This was the exception. I don’t understand the lectures, I don’t understand the book, I don’t understand anything. No shit my essay would be trash. 

My phone start plinging, but I ignore it. I have to get this. Maybe I’ll read the chapter one more time. I’ve lost count on how many times I’ve already read it, but I don’t have anything better going for me. I tried youtube videos, getting someone to explain it to me, reading, writing, everything. This was stressing me out, and the deadline is in one week. I don’t have good sources, or backups. I can’t change the theme. 

The phone rings again, but this time, I put it on silent. I have to get this, I need to understand it. Maybe I need a breather? But I don’t have time. I stand up and walk to the window. I can at least get some fresh air inside, I deserve that. I click the lock, pulling the window open. The fresh winter breeze flows into my room, shuffling my papers and pulling my hair. The outside arena has been filled with water, making a large skating rink. A bunch of people are skating, some with families, some while holding hands. They’re probably all finished with tests, exams and deadlines. I take a deep breath, filling my lungs with the ice cold air. A shiver runs through me, and I take it as a sign to sit down again. This essay isn’t going to write itself. I correct my papers and open the book in the right chapter again. Just keep reading, just keep reading. I’ll get there eventually. 

***

A loud knock is heard on my door, pulling me out of my trance. I’ve written how much? 4 sentences? At this pace, I’ll have to pull all-nighters all week. Someone knocks on the door again, and I check the time. It’s late, not too late, but who would be here at this time? I get up from the desk, walking to the door and unlocking it. Outside in the hall, Josh is standing with his stupidly cute smile and a plastic bag. 

“Josh” I sigh weakly, hugging him while putting all my weight on him. I’m so tired, so stressed and sick of my studies. 

“You look horrible” he whispers back, hands going around me to stop me from falling on the floor. 

“Thank you, I appreciate it” 

“Have you been outside today?” 

I look up at him, giving a guilty smile. He sees right through me and rolls his eyes. I let go, opening the door wider to let him in. 

“Brough you take-out, figured you were too obsessed with whatever you’re doing that you haven’t eaten”

“You’re an angel” 

“I know” he smiles, putting the bag down and pulling off his jacket. He goes to sit in my desk chair, glancing over all my notes. 

“Hard stuff” he grabs a paper, reading quickly over the highlighted lines. I turn to the food, taking out the different boxes. Chinese food, how sweet of him. 

“I’ve never been this stressed in my entire life” I complain, my neck sore and eyes tired. I grab a roll, eating it quickly. I’m apparently very hungry too. 

“You know, I actually wrote about how stress affects-” 

“Stop!” 

“What?”

“I don’t want to hear about how it’ll kill me, you psychology majors are insane with your theories” 

“It’s not a theory”

“Do you really think knowing this will help me or stress me out more”

“Yeah, you’re right” 

I take another roll, sitting down on the bed and eating it. 

“You know, you could do something more stress-relieving…”

He’s smiling, but I don’t know why. I don’t have time to do anything else right now. But, if it worked, I’d probably understand and write much faster. The offer is tempting. 

“Like what?”

“Well, according to your stress-patterns you-”

“Don’t psycho-analyze me” I threaten, pointing a finger at him, my hand now empty again. He puts his hands up, smirking. That stupid smirk. 

“Fine, okay. Let’s think of normal things then… taking a hot bath”

“I showered this morning” 

“It’s not to get clean, it’s to relax” 

“No, next” 

He shrugs, shaking his head in disbelief. I know I’m difficult, but he’s still here, so I haven’t cracked him yet. 

“Go for a walk?”

I laugh at him. No way I’m going somewhere, and when inspiration strikes I’m not there to take advantage of it. It might hit when I’m 20 minutes from home, and when I get back, it’ll be dead. 

“How about I put it this way Josh… I’m NOT leaving my room” 

He thinks hard, trying to come up with something. I subtle darkness coats his eyes as he looks up at me again, and I smile, intrigued by what he’s come up with. 

“I can only think of one more thing” 

“And that is?” 

He opens his mouth, but stops himself and snickers. I’m left in the dark. 

“Nah, you probably wouldn’t want to” 

I look around confused, throwing my hands out. I’m literally open to anything as long as I can relax a bit. 

“Oh, please tell me, I’m desperate” I whine jokingly, making him laugh. 

“Oh really? How desperate?” 

“Incredibly desperate, I’ll do anything” 

“Anything?” he asks, and I can already sense that I’ll regret saying it. He leans forward, loving that he knows about this secret thing which I don’t. God, he’s a prick. 

“Yes, now tell me” I urge, my curiosity overwhelming. 

“Fine, okay” he leans back on the chair, looking me up and down. “I mean, I could help you relax a bit” 

“With what?” 

“Jesus Christ” 

“Will you just tell me Josh?” 

He stands up, making his way over and cornering me with his arms. Oh. Ooooh… I heat up just from the thought, getting wetter by the second as I think about all the erotic possibilities of this encounter. 

That’s what he meant. I almost feel stupid for not getting it at first. But I have to remember that we’re friends, and this is a very intimate act. Would I really want to jeopardise our friendship for an essay? I already feel my body betraying me, heart racing quicker than my thoughts. 

My body gets the better of me, and I lean into him, capturing his lips and throwing my arms around him. He doesn’t waste time, returning the favour and leaning over me, pushing me back on the bed. Hand goes to my thigh, lifting my leg up. He places himself in between them, staying over me with the help of his other hand. A tight squeeze over my knee makes me gasp, and he uses the opportunity to put his tongue in my mouth. He explores all of me, touching in all the right places, occasionally rubbing where he senses I feel weaker. I pour all my tension into him, another form of it building up in my stomach, begging to be satisfied. 

“Josh…” 

He doesn’t stop, mouth instead moving to my neck as he kisses and sucks. 

“Tell me if you want to stop” he whispers against my skin. I don’t want to stop. I’ve wanted this for a long time, and using my stress as an excuse? I don’t know what will happen after this, but I do know that I want to fuck him. For as long as possible. 

He hits my spot under my jaw, making a loud involuntary moan escape my lips. I feel him smirk against my skin before biting down. My hand immediately flies to my mouth. It would not be good for me if the other people in the nearby dorms heard me. 

“I want to hear you” He’s quick to take hold of my hand, trapping it over my head, pressing my whole body down on the mattress. God he’s hot, I’ve never seen this side of him. I always thought he was ‘just talk no action’, but apparently I was wrong. 

“Fuck” I whimper, feeling messy and needy for him. He knew what he was doing, and it was working a little too well. 

“All my calls, all my texts, everything left unanswered…” 

“I was studying” I breathe out, voice high on ecstasy. His knee goes between my legs, and I lean against him, letting myself grind down on his leg. 

“Was it not just a trick to get me here? Don’t think for one second I haven’t seen those glances you give me when you think I’m not watching” 

“Josh…” 

“Don’t worry, when I’m finished with you, you wouldn’t  have to be so secretive anymore” 

He grabs the hem of my sweater, making me sit up a bit to drag it off. I’ve been home alone all day, so a bra was not necessary, leaving me half naked, the cold winter air from the window making my nipples hard. 

“Oh lord…” 

“Not gonna even the playing field?” I tease, tugging at his shirt. He laughs and unbuttons it, undressing quickly and throwing the garment on the floor. He does the same with his belt, dragging it off his jeans and leaving it on the floor. I feel a tug on the bottom of my pants, and he drags them off with ease, leaving me only in my panties. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful” he comments, laying himself on top of me again and capturing my lips on his. I feel around his upper body, gracing each curve and muscle. My hands wander to his back, pulling him closer, making him lay more of his weight on me. The kisses get wetter and sloppier as we keep going, my pulse going faster than ever before. I pull away a little, needing to take a breath. He uses the opportunity to work on my chest, kissing down my collar and groping my chest. His mouth keeps sucking, leaving dark marks all over my upper body. 

“Josh, please” I whimper, feeling the need overcome me. This is too much, I need him down there, fucking me senseless, just as I’ve always wished for. 

“I love hearing my name coming out of those pretty lips of yours” 

He moves lower, kissing the inside of my thighs and stroking my folds over the soaked fabric. 

“You’ve been wanting this for a long time haven’t you?”

I take a couple of deep breaths before answering, my body dysfunctional from all the waiting and different types of simulations. 

“Y-yes I have” 

“And you finally got what you wanted”

“Please” 

He raises his head, looking up at me. That stupid smirk is still plastered on his face as he’s come face to face with the reactions he gets out of me. 

“Say it again” There’s no use fighting him, my body begging to be touched. 

“Please” 

“Again” 

“Josh, please” 

“As you wish” 

His head goes down again, biting and licking my thigh as his fingers slowly drags my underwear off. It falls off my feet, and his tongue takes a long lick over my folds. My immediate reaction is to close my legs, but his hands stop me, holding both of them in their place. He takes a chance, one of his hands moving to my heat, stroking over the wet area. 

“You’re already so ready for me” 

His tongue finds its way to my clit, licking soft circles as one of his fingers moves inside me, curling upwards. My legs jolt again, but he doesn’t mind, instead keeps pumping his finger and getting me off with his tongue. I feel my edge come closer, and I try to hold it, not wanting to come so incredibly fast. 

“I know you’re holding back dear” 

I try to come with a reply, but it leaves my lips as incoherent erotic melodies, going in tact with his rhythm. He takes out his hand, relieving some of the pressure which is begging to be let out. I try to steady my breathing, but am interrupted as he puts another finger in, filling me even more up. His tongue applies more pressure than before, and I can’t control myself as I come all over him, spilling my juices down his fingers and lips. 

I take deep breaths, ecstasy washing over while throwing my head back. Fuck he’s good. I feel my legs twitch from all the action, pent up stress and energy leaving my body as the high lowers. 

I hear something hitting the floor, and look up to find him standing in front of me. Naked. Big. Holy shit, how am I supposed to take that. 

“You look scared” he smiles, going on top of me once again, giving me sweet kisses. I taste myself on him, but the passionate nature of it is almost… romantic. 

“Just, surprised” I manage to breathe out. 

“Oh, you haven’t seen nothing yet” he teases, giving me another passionate kiss. His dick graces over my folds, coating itself in my last high. His hand goes down to adjust himself, but before he inserts himself, he looks down at my flushed face, waiting for something. 

“You want this?” 

“Yes I fucking want this, Josh please” 

He doesn’t need to hear anything else, slowly inserting himself in me. I throw my head back, feeling him fill me up, widening my walls. He groans as he keeps going, letting out a deep breath as he’s all in. He waits a couple of seconds, still holding himself up over me. 

“Fuck, you feel so good” he exclaims, cheeks red and breath heavy. 

“Please keep going” I urge him, and he starts moving. Slowly going out and slamming deep into me again. It takes a couple of pushes for him to get his rhythm back. The room fills with both our moans, and I pull him down, killing some of them on our lips. 

He takes hold of my thigh, pulling my whole leg up, letting himself deeper inside. My nails scratch his back as he keeps going, both of our orgasms building up. I hold on to him, chest against chest, his pelvis rubbing against me as he slams himself in and out. 

“Let me ride you” I whisper, and he stops for a bit, taken aback by my request. 

“You sure?” 

“Get on your back” I breathe out, trying to sound stern. My tone fails me, and I just sound desperate instead, but I don’t mind. I want him, I need him. He obliges, laying down on his back. I move on top of him, and he looks up at me, mouth agape and eyes blank. He’s so turned on, so hard and so desperate. Probably as needy as me. I steady myself, lowering my body onto him, letting him inside. I bit my lip to stop my noises, feeling him go deeper than before. 

I watch his face, cheeks still pink and skin shiny. His mouth keeps opening, letting out the most vulnerable sound I’ve ever heard from him. 

“And I thought you looked good on top” I start, feeling a smirk find its way to my lips. “Turns out you’re even better under me” 

“Fuck, you’re gonna make me come” he whimpers, grabbing hold of my thigh, bouncing me up and down on him. 

“That’s the goal” I lean down, kissing his collar and neck while still bouncing my ass on him. 

“You’re so incredibly hot” 

His grip tightens, probably leaving red marks which’ll last for days. I feel my core building up, getting awfully hot and tight. 

“Josh, I’m going t-”

“Do it, do it” 

I can’t hold myself, coming all over his cock, tightening around him. I give a cry, body sweaty and hot as I try to keep the rhythm going. The pain starts getting to me, the cause of overstimulation and exhaustion. He notices, and uses his hips and arms to turn us around. 

I slam back into the maddress, my breath being knocked out of me. I don’t get time to regain it as Josh ups his pace, slamming into me harder and faster. I grip the sheets, trying to stay grounded as I feel my whole body rocking back and forth. He leans forward, intertwining my hand in his, while still keeping up the pace. I grip his hand hard, tension building up again as he uses the other to rub my clit. 

“I love you like this, all fucked out” he whispers, making me tighter. I wince as I come another time, pain and pleasure shooting through me. I’ve lost feeling in my legs, letting them hang weakly around his waist. He grunts and moans, burying himself in me as he reaches his orgasm. I feel him twitch inside me, sloppily pulling out as he collapses beside me. His hand goes to my chin, turning my head towards him before leaning forward for a kiss. I let him, sinking into the small action. 

“Still stressed?”

“More exhausted, but no, I’m not stressed” I explain, slowly regaining control of my pulse. 

“Need a power-nap?” I nod, and he walks to the bathroom, coming back with a warm wet cloth and cleaning me up. We both drag ourselves to the top of the bed, getting under the covers and relaxing. I lean into him, feeling his body sink down. 

I think about the essay, everything I could’ve done in the time we fucked. The theme is hard, and the texts are difficult, but… Shit!

“Omg” I exclaim, sitting up. 

“What, is something wrong?” he asks, looking up at me with concern. I stand up, walk to the desk and grab my computer before laying down with him on the bed again. 

“I suddenly understood this one passage” I exclaim, not feeling that tired anymore. I actually understood something! Finally! 

I open the computer, and start typing on the related paragraph. This was gonna be good, I could finally get the parallel I wanted, and compare it to the subtext. 

“Well, I’ll be laying right here if you need me again” he makes himself comfortable, kissing my chin and letting his fingers rub soft circles on my arm. 

[cursedlovesstuff]

She Drew Stars Around My Scars.

~

Natasha was lounging on her bed, absently flipping through TV channels. Beside her, Y/N was focused on drawing on Nat’s arm with a pen.

The room was cozy, filled with sketches and designs from Y/N’s latest projects, scattered over the desk and nightstand. Y/N’s pen moved in smooth, deliberate strokes as she concentrated on her work.

Nat watched her for a moment, feeling a sense of comfort in the quiet intimacy of the moment. "Can I see now?" Nat asked.

Y/N shook her head, a teasing smile on her lips. “Hold on, I’m almost done.” Her tongue peeked out as she focused on adding the final details.

Nat shifted slightly to reach for the TV remote, accidentally catching a glimpse of what Y/N had drawn on her arm.

She froze, staring in surprise at the pattern of stars intricately placed around the pale scars on her skin.

“What?” Y/N asked, noticing Nat's silence and the look of shock on her face. “Why are you so quiet? What's wrong?”

Nat traced a finger over the stars, her voice soft with disbelief. “You drew stars around my scars.”

Y/N met her gaze, her eyes filled with warmth. “You’re always complaining about your scars,” she explained gently. “Even though you hate them, I think they’re beautiful. They’re a reminder of what you’ve been through and what you’ve survived.”

Nat was silent, absorbing Y/N’s words. She felt a swell of emotion, a mix of gratitude and vulnerability. “No one’s ever thought of them that way before,” she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper.

Y/N squeezed her hand gently, meeting her eyes with sincerity. “Well, I always have. To me, they tell a story of how strong you are. You’ve overcome so much, and I admire you for it.”

Y/N smiled softly, her hand resting gently on Nat’s. “I remember when you got this one,” she said, gesturing to a particularly jagged scar. “You came to me for help because you got hurt on a mission.”

Nat smiled lightly, the memory clear in her mind. “I remember how you were panicking more than I was,” she teased, her eyes shining with affection.

“You really worried me that day,” Y/N replied, her tone a mix of fondness and exasperation.

Nat looked at her, her heart full. “I know, but I’m glad you were there,” she said sincerely, her thumb brushing over Y/N’s knuckles.

Y/N felt a flutter in her chest at the sincerity in Nat’s voice. Leaning forward, Nat pressed a gentle kiss to Y/N’s lips, lingering for a moment before pulling back slightly.

“I love you,” Nat said softly, her eyes locked with Y/N’s.

Y/N grinned, feeling a warmth spread through her. “I love you too. Now, can I have your arm back?” she asked playfully. “I need to finish drawing some spiders.”

Nat chuckled, settling back into the cushions. “Spiders, huh? You have an interesting sense of style.”

“Trust me, it’ll look great,” Y/N replied resuming her work on Nat’s arm.

[7ndipity]

Secret Crush

Ot7 x Reader

Summary: How they would handle having a secret crush on reader who’s not a celebrity and/or only views them as a friend, so they can’t show their affection.

Warnings: lil angsty,

A/N: Thanks to the lovely anons who requested this! This is slightly similar to the falling for a friend hcs I did a while back, but I thought I’d try to cover the more unrequited aspects, though I'm not the best at those. Hope you like it anyway!

Masterlist

Requests are open

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Jin:

GUILT. He honestly feels so bad that he’s put you in this awkward of a situation, even though you don’t have a clue you’re even in an awkward situation.

As I said before, I think he would try to content himself with just being the best ‘best friend’ you could ever ask for.

Which works, until it doesn’t. Because the closer you get, the harder it is for him to hide his feelings.

He fusses/worries about you a lot.

Would probably get jealous surprisingly easy, but try and brush it off with comments like “They’re just not good enough for you.”

Yoongi:

I’ve said it before, if he doesn’t want you to know about something, you. will. never. know. and that’s especially true when it comes to this.

Even if he’s absolutely head over heels for you, you won’t catch on, bc he finds legitamite excuses for any questionable behavior he might display around you.

Becomes a bit standoff-ish at times, but if he ever sees you struggling with something or needing help, he’s there in an instant.

It honestly gives you whiplash how fast he goes from ‘I don’t care’ to ‘I care a lot actually’, but he claims he’s just trying to be a good friend.

Y’all probably fight a lot, but If anybody else ever hurts/upsets you tho, he will end them(only half joking).

Hobi:

Again, as I said before, he’s naturally a very affectionate person, so how he’d behave towards his crush wouldn’t be that different from how he is with his other friends.

But on the inside, I think he would be overanilyzing everything, trying to make sure he’s not overstepping any bounderies.

Very much the ‘suck it up and smile’ mentality, which isn’t exactly the best/healthiest approach, but he doesn’t care.

So long as you’re happy, he’s happy.

I actually think he would be one of the worst at this kind of dynamic, he’d either end up confessing or distancing himself.😥

Namjoon:

So conflicted.

Might try and distance himself from you at first, bc he thinks it’ll make it easier from him to get over you, but then he just feels lonely all the time, and he’d rather be with you than without you, so he just tries to suck it up and pretend everythings cool.

Which he’s pretty good at, to an extent.

Literally can not stand seeing you flirt or show interest in anyone else tho, like it makes him feel physically unwell. If you do, he’s ghosting for a bit.

You end up developing a very intense ‘on again, off again’ friendship, which results in more than a few fights between you😖

Jimin:

As usual, Jimin is the personification of confusion for me.

Bc he doesn’t exactly hide his feelings towards you, but he’s always tacking on the line of ‘as a friend’ to the end of everything to avoid looking suspisious.

Flirting is basically his second language tho and that will not change unless it makes you uncomfortable, and then he’s the image polite respectfulness.

He just always wants you to be comfortable and happy, but he can get a bit over protective at times for seemingly no reason.

Every now and then though, it starts to weigh on him a bit more and he gets a bit moody and distant.

Taehyung:

Acts completly normal, until he doesn’t.

Can go from beaming and having the best time with you to sad puppy in instant bc he caught himself going to hold your hand or smth, and he has the record scratch moment of ‘wait no, that’s not what friends do’.

Of course you catch these sudden drops in his mood, but he never tells you what’s going on, so you just try to stick closer to him to make him feel better.

Which only increases his frustration sometimes, but other times he can’t help indulging in the affection when he can get it.

Tends to feel guilty afterwards for not being honest with you, but he’d rather have you as just a friend than potentially not at all.

Jungkook:

Not the best at hiding his feelings, but he manages.

His main issue is that he gets jealous and overprotective very easily, but knows he can’t exactly keep you close without drawing attention to himself.

Has nearly gotten into several fights bc he didn’t like the way someone was looking at/treating you. You joke that he’s your guard dog, but he takes it seriously.

Similar to Joon, y’all would end up with this ‘on and off’ type relationship that goes from being super close to barely talking.

Another that I think would either end up confessing anyway, just to get it out there, or pulling away.

[clarisse0o]

Camp Wiegman-Part 74

Lucy Bronze x Ona Batlle

Alternative Universe: Military School

Words: 5K

Masterlist

———————————————————————

Friday, March 25th; 9:15 a.m. - Camp Wiegman

I arrive in the common room where a large number of students have gathered. The head teachers and some instructors, including Lucy, have been called to a big meeting. The students are saying it’s about yesterday’s scandal, as several of them, myself included, suffered from indigestion. I’ll ask Lucy if that’s true. They were smart about it; they scheduled it for 9 a.m. to make sure we couldn’t leave before noon. So, we have an hour of free time. I spot Alexia sitting on the couch, chatting with a guy I don’t know. I’m glad she’s here too. We didn’t know which class would be freed due to the meeting. I walk over to them with my friends. I wanted to use this break to catch up on the form we had to fill out for the trip. The others assured me I didn’t miss much. They were bored to death, especially Leah, who was left alone because of me. The good thing is they’re going to give me their notes to help me fill out the questionnaire. I want to show my teacher I’m capable of working. Especially since he’s developed a kind of disdain for me recently. He didn’t even check on me yesterday or say I didn’t need to turn in my work. Well, according to Alessia, the questions were simple, and she thinks I wouldn’t have had any trouble answering them if I’d gone on the trip.

"Hey," I greet Ale.

"Oh, you’re here too!" she exclaims, hugging me. "How are you feeling?"

"Still the same as this morning," I joke.

Alexia was really worried when she found out I was one of the affected students. Fortunately, I was just sick yesterday. This morning feels like yesterday never happened. Of course, I skipped the hot chocolate today. It’ll take me some time before I can drink it again, but for now, I’m sticking to orange juice.

"Can you lend me your notes, Alessia?" I ask my friend, who’s now sitting on my other side.

"Oh, forget about school for a bit! You’re with us for once!" Ale scolds me.

"Alright, alright," I laugh. "You sound just like Lucy."

"She scolds you too?" Leah teases from the couch across from us.

"Yeah," I groan, stretching. "She dragged me out all weekend to make me stop. According to her, I always find something to obsess over when I’m stressed."

"She’s not wrong. Speaking of stress, have you heard back from the galleries?"

"It’s better not to talk about frustrating things right now..." Alessia comments on my behalf.

I cross my arms, feeling a bit down. I’ve gotten a few rejections this week, which I shared with Alessia. She also loves art and is happy that I’m pursuing it. She doesn’t have the same courage as me, though, since she plans to stick with administration to secure her future. I have to admit I’m starting to feel anxious about the feedback. Maybe I’ll have to do the same as her. There’s no way I’m staying home doing nothing, though.

"Don’t worry. I heard Mapi’s coming this weekend. That’s cool; she’ll be able to cheer you up."

I raise an eyebrow.

"What do you mean, Mapi’s coming?"

"Uh... You didn’t know? I called Jenni after class. Lucy told her this morning that she’s coming."

"Lucy?!"

This news catches me off guard. How is it that she knew before me that my best friend is coming? And even if that’s the case, why didn’t she just tell me? Alexia feels bad about my reaction.

"Maybe it was supposed to be a surprise...? Crap. I probably shouldn’t have told you! Lucy’s going to kill me! Can you pretend you don’t know?"

I smile despite myself and shake my head. Maybe she’s right. I hope so, honestly.

"What are you offering for my silence?" I tease, amused.

She playfully hits my arm, and our friends laugh. It’s so easy to tease her. I laugh too, but I’m glad she’s getting along better with my girlfriend. Suddenly, I start thinking about Mapi. It’s not surprising I wasn’t informed by her; I’ve been out of the loop, buried in my studies. Maybe she did message me, and I missed it. That would be more worrying. I already feel bad just thinking about it.

"So, what are we doing? Besides catching up on boring school stuff, of course."

"Hey. Calm down, will you?"

"Nope. By the way, Alba’s meeting Jenni next weekend. She’ll probably stop by the gym."

"Really? Where is she anyway?" I ask, glancing around.

"Probably with her girlfriend somewhere. I haven’t seen her since we got let out."

I chuckle, imagining exactly where they must be. Normally, we’re not allowed to have «intimate relationship », but with the supervision lightened, now’s probably the perfect time.

"I see. So, she’s stuck in for the weekend?"

"Yeah. Misa’s staying with her. That’s why we’re doing it next weekend. She’s excited to meet her..."

"I bet. How did Jenni take it?"

"She doesn’t know yet. Don’t say anything, though. I’m planning to break it to her gently this weekend..."

I laugh heartily. I’d pay to see her face when she tells her. I think she’s going to be totally shocked. Alexia explained to me that her only fear is that her sister won’t accept her, which would strain their relationship. I understand that. The opinion of someone close to you carries a lot of weight. I’ve been a victim of that between Lucy and Mapi myself.

"And why are you introducing them at their gym? Is there no other place?"

"What’s ‘their gym'?" Leah asks.

"Oh, uh... You don’t know."

"You’re not allowed to talk about it, are you?" she teases.

We glance at each other, and I shrug. I’m not sure, actually. Lucy hasn’t mentioned anything, but I don’t think she wants the students to know it’s her last year.

"Sorry, Leah," I simply say.

She shrugs indifferently. She doesn’t seem upset, so it’s fine.

"Anyway, so?"

"Well, I figured it’d be a neutral place. Plus, she’ll see that she has ambitious plans and that she’s not irresponsible."

"Hmm, hmm," I tease.

"What? You don’t think it’s a good idea?"

"I just wonder if you’re not trying to convince yourself..." I giggle.

"A little..." she admits. "Plus, I figured you guys would be there just in case..."

"Oh no, I’m stopping you right there. Lucy’s already told me she doesn’t want to be there when it happens."

"Oh no," she pouts. "Don’t tell me that."

"I swear. I didn’t even have to ask. She brought it up herself, and I don’t think it’s negotiable. She keeps saying she doesn’t want to see any of my friends from here before the end of the year. I’m sorry..."

"What if I organize a party?" Leah suggests. "It would kill two birds with one stone since I’d like to see her outside of here."

I grimace a little. She doesn’t realize I’m going to get scolded again if I keep pushing.

"That could be fun, being all together," Alessia agrees.

"You guys are unbelievable. You really can’t wait a month and a half?"

"Tell that to Alba," Alexia retorts. "She’s the one trying so hard to bring the events closer."

I sigh, running a hand through my hair.

"When would this party be?" I give in.

"In three weeks," Leah tells me. "My parents will be going away for the weekend with some friends. We figured it’d be the perfect time to throw another party. Plus, it’s right before the holidays."

Alessia nods beside her, confirming what Leah just said.

"OK…" I mutter. "I’ll see what I can do, but I can’t promise anything. Lucy can be really stubborn when she wants to be."

"Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you! You’re the best!" Ale replies excitedly.

She kisses my cheek several times before letting me go. Meanwhile, I keep glancing at every door that opens, hoping Lucy will walk through. We don’t know how long the meeting will last, but I’m optimistic. I smile when I see it’s not my girlfriend, but Ingrid. I interrupt Ale and Leah’s conversation, where my roommate is asking if it’s okay for her girlfriend to come, since she’s now planning to delay the meeting between her and her sister until then.

"I’ll be right back," I say as I stand up.

Alexia watches me, confused, until she spots Ingrid.

"Oh no. Please don’t tell her you know about Mapi. I’ll get in trouble again!" 

I laugh and wave her off. Whether she likes it or not, I’m definitely going to question Ingrid, who’s probably the first to know what’s going on. I approach her, and she spots me right away, greeting me with a smile.

"What brings you here, Ona?"

"Hey, how are you?"

"Good, and you?"

"Good too. Is Lucy still in the meeting?"

"Yep. You probably won’t see her all morning. She’s got a meeting with Wiegman right after."

A lightbulb goes off in my head. Damn! I completely forgot about that! She had told me earlier in the week that she scheduled a meeting with her to resign. Ingrid laughs, clearly noticing that I just remembered.

"I’m such an idiot."

"If you say so," she teases.

I bite my lip. I wish I could’ve said something to encourage her, but now it’s too late.

"Don’t stress about it. She won’t hold it against you. She knows you’ve got a lot on your mind. And you weren’t feeling well yesterday either."

I nod. It doesn’t erase the guilt I feel, though. I’ll try to make up for it this weekend. In the meantime, I remember why I’m here in the first place.

"I heard Mapi is coming."

"Did Alexia spill the beans?"

"Was it supposed to be a surprise?"

"Oh no. Mapi’s tried texting you several times this week, but none of the messages got through. She thinks your phone’s off. Lucy wanted to tell you yesterday, but you weren’t feeling well."

I groan, realizing what’s happened. I feel really bad now. My phone must be off since I haven’t used it since Monday.

"At least you found out she’s coming before we go pick her up, so it’s not too bad."

I scowl as she clearly makes fun of me. Well, I deserve it. At least she doesn’t beat around the bush when telling me things.

"So, we’re going together to pick her up?"

"Yep. Lucy suggested we all have lunch together after we pick her up."

I nod, grateful she’s taken the initiative without needing my input. Damn, I really need to make up for all of this this weekend.

"OK… Thanks."

"No problem."

I can tell she finds this situation amusing. With an embarrassed smile, I turn back to my friends. Hopefully, once I apologize to everyone, I won’t feel as foolish. 

Friday, March 25; 12:15 PM - Camp Wiegman.

I was waiting for Lucy outside the school, like we usually do. I had already seen Ingrid’s car pass by, so I figured Lucy would be next, and sure enough, her car pulls into the parking lot. She parks in the open spot right in front of me. I have so many things to tell her, I don’t even know where to start. I put my suitcase in the trunk and join her in the front seat.

"Hey."

"Hi."

I lose my smile when I see the serious look on her face.

"Is something wrong?"

"Get in. It’s windy."

I do as she says, closing the door behind me. The bad weather has passed, and we’ve got sunshine, but a cool breeze has followed it.

"What’s going on?" I ask, seeing her stare straight ahead.

I don’t like seeing her like this. Luckily, she’s not one to beat around the bush with me.

"Wiegman knows."

My heart skips a beat at this unexpected news. Then it starts racing, and I can’t calm it down. No, this can’t be happening. Not now, not when my exams are in a month. Not after all the effort I’ve put in. Tears well up in my eyes. I blink to get rid of them, but it’s no use.

"Is it…? H-how? This is crazy!"

"Hey, hey," she says, noticing my state. "Calm down. It’s not as bad as you think."

She takes my hands and kisses them, one by one. Her calmness manages to soothe me, even though I still don’t know how things aren’t as bad as she says.

"How did she find out?"

"Your management professor… He saw me kiss you yesterday while you were still asleep. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I was planning to this weekend."

"He… That jerk!" I fume. "Did you talk to him?"

"No, I didn’t get the chance. What caught me off guard was that he reported us to Wiegman before I could even do that."

"And Wiegman!? Did she believe him? Just like that? Without letting us explain ourselves?"

"Calm down, baby. No. She asked for my side of the story… I didn’t want to lie, especially when I had my resignation letter in my hand."

I must look shocked. She didn’t do that, did she?

"Stop panicking. Neither of us is getting expelled," she tells me.

"Wait—we’re not…?"

A small smile appears on her face. I remember her first expression. She must have been just as angry as I am. Now she looks like she’s teasing me. How can she? Our principal knows! Shouldn’t we be packing up and getting out of here? That’s what happened to Jenni!

"Given the circumstances, no, I’m not."

"Are you going to explain?"

She chuckles softly, still holding my hands in hers. I don’t find this funny. She dropped this bombshell on me and is now laughing about it. It’s hard to understand.

"We had a long discussion. I spent nearly two hours in her office. When she brought it up, I didn’t know what to do, but I decided to be honest, and it looks like that paid off."

"We’re really not getting expelled?"

"No. I think the fact that you’re your mother’s daughter helped a lot."

I relax, and for the first time in my life, I’m grateful to be her daughter.

"I confirmed our relationship, but I also explained all the good I’ve brought to you. I told her about how hard you’re working to pass your exam, your progress, and your future plans.

- And what did she say?

- She was hesitant at first, until I showed her the pile of exercises you gave me to correct. She realized that our relationship is serious and that it’s helping you.

- Of course! And that’s it?

- Sort of. I told her that if she has to expel someone, she should only expel me, and I handed her my resignation letter. I didn’t want her to ruin your future over this.

- But I thought...

- I’m not expelled, Ona. Let me finish.

- Sorry, I said, blushing.

She’s talking a lot without getting to the point, but I can tell my impatience is amusing her.

- She initially thought I was giving her my resignation because of this, but I told her about my plans to open a gym. Thanks to our evening classes and Ingrid’s testimony, she recognized my professionalism and honesty. She didn’t want to destroy your efforts or our future, so… she’s cutting us some slack. I’ll remain your supervisor until the end.

- So… Wiegman knows, and we’re not expelled…?

I mutter the words, struggling to comprehend them. It feels so surreal.

- It’s not without consequences. She’s going to talk to your professor to make him drop the idea. As for us, we need to stay discreet. If anyone else sees us together and reports it, she won’t be able to protect us, and both our futures will be at risk. Do you understand?

I nod, feeling completely lost. Wow. I never saw this coming. It’s insane.

- Then why did you look so serious earlier? You scared me!

- Sorry. I don’t know. Shocked and angry, I guess. I’m having a hard time processing it too. I always imagined I’d be leaving the day she found out.

- Well, that’s not happening. Isn’t this good news?

- Oh, definitely.

- I suppose I should forget the question I was going to ask you...

- What question? she asks curiously.

- Leah invited us to a party she’s throwing with everyone. Alexia wants us to come because she’s planning to introduce Jenni to Alba.

I quickly explain while playing with her fingers. I knew it would be complicated, but it’s even more so now.

- You know we’ve had this conversation before, Lucy begins, tilting my chin up.

- I know. It’s the others who pressured me...

- I know it’s complicated for you, but we need to stay discreet a little longer. After that, I promise we can shout our love for each other to anyone.

- And go out with my friends?

She rolls her eyes with a small smile. At first, I could tell this situation suited her. I mean, it must be strange for her too, hanging out with people who were once her students.

- Yes, sweetheart. We can go out with your friends. I’d do anything for you.

I kiss her tenderly at this admission. She’s a sweetheart.

- We need to go. Ingrid’s probably waiting for us, she murmurs between kisses.

I pull away and buckle up at the mention.

- Yeah, I heard Mapi’s coming this morning...

- That’s right. Ingrid told me how upset you were about it, she chuckles, placing a hand on my thigh as she starts the car. I’m sorry. I wanted to tell you yesterday, but I completely forgot because of your condition.

- It’s my fault too. I’ve been so out of it...

- Don’t beat yourself up about it. You’re allowed to work hard during the week, she unexpectedly defends me. Mapi will understand.

- Hmm...

- If it helps, I gave her updates on your behalf.

- Really? I asked, surprised.

- Well, yes. She worries when you don’t reply, so she comes to me.

- Thanks.

- You don’t have to thank me for that. She’s your best friend.

- Yes, but it’s not like you’re her biggest fan, I chuckled.

She rolls her eyes in amusement.

- True, she mutters. But you’d be surprised what we could do together for you.

I smile at the thought. I think she’s right. Even if they don’t exactly get along, they’d tolerate each other for my sake. We finally arrive at Ingrid’s place to pick her up. I offered to let her sit up front, but she insisted I stay there. Next stop: the airport. Our chat with Lucy made us late, so by the time we get there, Mapi is already waiting with her suitcase. She greets us one by one, finishing, of course, with Ingrid, whom she can’t stop kissing.

- Couldn’t resist coming, huh? I teased.

- Nope, not really. I’m taking the opportunity to bring some things over and see you both, since I heard you won’t be around for the next holidays.

- That’s true, I admit with a shy smile. Sorry about that.

Lucy pulls me into a hug when she notices how I feel. It’s a fair complaint. I didn’t handle these holidays, but I do know Lucy booked our tickets—and Jenni and Alexia’s—this week.

- It’s okay, I’m just teasing. Your girlfriend defended you enough for me to forgive you, she says, giving me a little hug.

I really need to thank Lucy for that. Usually, Mapi holds grudges much longer. Finally, we head to the restaurant. We’re all starving. Our girlfriends take us to a place I haven’t been before. Mapi seems in good spirits, chatting non-stop about her plans to move here after the school year. Her doubts are far behind her now. She hasn’t heard from her parents in a long time either. She confided that she thinks it’s time to cut ties with them for good. I can only support her in that. I’ve met them once, but they were never really around due to their work. When they did talk to their daughter, it was mostly to criticize her or try to convince her to change her mind about taking over the family business. In that kind of situation, there’s no point in staying in contact. I really admire Mapi’s courage. Even though my mom and I were estranged for a long time, I don’t know if I’d have the guts to do the same. I’m very tied to family, especially because of the promises I made to my dad. Plus, if Mapi were in my situation, I doubt her parents would have offered the help my mom gave me last year. I can blame my mom for a lot of things, but not that, and it’s why I decided to reconnect with her.

- I ran into Abby this week while grocery shopping, Mapi tells me.

- Really? I say, not looking up from the menu.

I’m thinking of getting a burger. I saw one go by, and it looked delicious. Our drinks arrive within minutes. The service seems fast, which is good because I’m starving.

- She told me about the wedding... Is that why you reacted so strongly the last time she visited?

- Not really. There were a lot of things that set me off.

- I’m not going to force you to talk about it, but I think Abby believes you don’t want to come. You should give her a call if you plan on going. That’s all she’s waiting for.

- Do you know the date? She didn’t have time to tell us, Lucy asks.

- Uh, I don’t remember exactly. I think it’s in June.

So soon? I must have shown my surprise because she gives me a sympathetic smile.

- Well, I guess you should call her today, huh? Lucy advises, rubbing my thigh to comfort me.

In just two months, my mom will marry another man. I’m struggling to process it. Everything must have been planned behind my back for months. Lucy kisses my temple, and the conversation moves on. I have trouble following. It’s like my mom was waiting for me to finish school so I could attend the wedding. It warms my heart, in a way. She’s hoping I’ll be there, despite everything that’s happened between us.

We’ll talk more about it when we get home, if you want, Lucy whispers in my ear. »

I nod and snuggle up to her on the bench we're sharing. I'm not sure if it will be necessary, but it always feels good to confide in her. Meanwhile, Mapi keeps talking about how hard she's been working lately. Looks like I'm not the only one pushing myself for this final stretch. The only difference is that she manages to juggle her two lives without anyone saying anything to her. I think I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed, too. It's not easy to catch up on everything I've missed. But I’m going to hang in there. I'm almost there.

Friday, March 25th; 10:15 PM - Ona and Lucy’s Apartment  

We’ve just come home for the first time today. I’m glad to be back in our place. The atmosphere immediately puts me at ease. We spent the day with the girls, in town, then at the gym later in the afternoon where Jenni, Alexia, and Beth were still working, preparing to receive the first pieces of furniture in two weeks. Then, it’ll finally be vacation time. I sigh as I settle next to my girlfriend on the couch.

- “Relieved to be home?”  

- “Oh yes!” I reply. “It’s good to relax too.”  

- “Definitely.”  

I sigh contentedly as my head falls onto her lap. Lucy immediately starts running her fingers through my hair. I close my eyes to enjoy the moment to the fullest.  

- “Do you want to call your mom?”  

- “Oh no,” I groan. “Not tonight. I’ll do it tomorrow, when I can take my time.”

I lay on my side, placing my hand on her thigh. It’s a pretty comfortable position. Lucy is sitting with her feet stretched out on the other side of the couch, facing the TV. She flips through the channels before settling on some random series I’m not really paying attention to.

- “Are you feeling good about going to your mom’s wedding?”  

I nod, lifting my head to look at Lucy. She’s watching me intently. She’s always so worried about me, and it’s adorable.

- “She wants us there, so we’ll be there.”  

- “Alright…”  

- “Shouldn't we be thinking about our next vacation instead?” I ask.  

- “If you want. I didn’t tell you, but… I booked a ticket to land in Lisbon.”  

- “What? How come?”  

- “Well, since we’re already going to Portugal, I thought we might as well visit the city where you grew up and where your dad is buried.”  

- “That’s amazing! Thank you so much.”  

- “It’s no big deal,” she smiles.  

- “How long will we stay? I guess you’ve already planned everything?”  

She laughs and nods.

- “We’ll arrive in Porto around the same time as Jenni and Alexia, for about a week.”  

- “You’re so sweet, always thinking of me.”  

- “I know,” she jokes. “Do you have any family we could stay with?”  

- “Of course. My grandfather.”  

- “Oh, right. The one you like so much, right?”  

- “Yes! I can’t wait for you to meet him! I’ll let him know as soon as I can. He’s going to be so happy.”  

I sit up and straddle her to show my gratitude with a big hug.

- “Thank you, really. I love you so much.”  

- “I love you too, my love.”

We kiss tenderly before I rest my head on her shoulder.

- “Are you sure your parents are going to like me?”  

She laughs, running her hand through my hair, sending shivers down my spine. It’s a fear that haunts me. I’m afraid they won’t accept me, and that Lucy might leave me because of it. When I lift my head again, she looks at me with adoration, her eyes filled with all the love she has for me.

- “I promise they will.”  

- “You seem really sure of that…”  

- “Stop worrying about it. They’re going to love you. They’re actually really excited to meet you.”  

- “Really…? You’ve already told them about me?”  

- “Of course. I’ve had plenty of chances to call them from school and talk about you. They know you exist and that we’re coming in a few weeks. They also know you were my student at school, why you were there, but most importantly, they know how much I love you.”  

- “Y-you told them everything!? Oh my God!”  

I try to pull away, but Lucy holds me back with a small laugh. There’s nothing funny about this! How could she tell her parents that I was a former junkie who ran away with my ex to ruin my life?

- “Calm down. I did it to save you from a bunch of awkward questions. I wanted to tell them myself so they’d know what to expect. Mostly, I wanted them to understand how much you mean to me and that they’d better not traumatize you. Well, at least not my dad. He’s a saint compared to my mom.”  

- “Fantastic,” I say sarcastically.  

Lucy smiles and presses her lips to mine.

- “I promise you don’t have to worry. And how about we head to bed now, huh? We’ve got a busy day ahead of us tomorrow, again.”  

- “OK…” I murmur. “Speaking of tomorrow, I made a few sketches for the walls of the rooms you guys want me to decorate.”  

- “Oh, really? I won’t ask when you found time to do that.”  

- “In my room,” I reply. “Who do you think I am? I’ve become responsible!”

I squeal as she lifts me up, turning off the TV in the process. The way she carries me to our bedroom brings back so many memories.

- “Of course, my love. We’ll take a look at them in the morning. Right now, it’s time for bed.”  

I smile, snuggling back against her shoulder. I’m not going to argue with that.

[gay-dorito-dust]

Can i request headcandons of the spiderverse Boys with a shy nurse reader who is constantly tired? Being nurse and spider person is a physically and mentally demanding job and i think that would be nice see more spiderverse content, but if u don't want to make this request i understand

A/n: I’m sorry Most of these are either short cuz I didn’t know what to put for them or come across as a carbon copy of the other in due to me not knowing what to put there instead🤣

Miles sympathises with you wholeheartedly.

Trying to find a healthy balance between being a nurse -an intensive and highly demanding profession- and being a hero was definitely a challenge that had detrimental affects upon one’s mental and physical health.

Miles would affirm you with his words of praises and encouragement all the while holding you tightly, wilfully being your personal pillow/recharging station that often times he’d catch you fall asleep against him because his presence was that warm and comforting to you that it lulled you into a peaceful sleep.

Miles deeply admires your dedication to saving people not only as hero but also within the medical field. But he often does worry that you work yourself to the bone trying to find a way to perform both tasks without having them overlap one another.

There do come days where it all becomes a bit too much as your body grows sick and tired of your constant negligence and choose it’s way of rebelling by refusing you any sort of mobility of your limbs. Your mental state also tanks which only made your want to move even harder as you didn’t even have to willpower to make it so.

Miles would be a major source of comfort during these moments as he would remind you of all the achievements and accomplishments you’ve made during your tenure as both hero and Nurse. He’d probably have his music on as background noise whilst he’s taking the time and effort in making sure you’re as comfortable as possible.

Things he most often says are;

‘You have done so many amazing things and your only just getting started! How cool is that?!’

‘You’re an inspiration to not only the people you save on a daily basis but your also an inspiration to me as well that I even made art about you. Here, take a look!’

‘Don’t beat yourself up over this, you always get back up and hit them twice as hard because that’s what my y/n does, for my y/n ain’t no quitter, they’re a fighter.’

‘Bad days come to pass because the better ones always remain.’

‘Rest, I’ll take over from here.’

‘You’re not alone in this because I’m not going anywhere, I’ll be right here to catch you when you need me to.’

Pavitr would, If you let him, smother you in affection and cuddles but to the right amount so it doesn’t cross the border where it could potentially get annoying.

Which with Pav, it never does because his hugs and cuddles were the best and yet to be topped by anything or anyone because they are superior.

Plus they brought you warmth and comfort that you can’t help but bury yourself into his neck after a shit day in hopes of forgetting all about it as his hand rubs your back soothingly whilst also fighting the urge to just fall asleep then and there.

Also this lad would just spoil you with small gifts as to show his appreciation for you even though he does so quite eloquently enough with his words and his actions that this was merely the cherry on top.

Due to Pavitr being more able to read people then most, he’d notice the indicators within you that told him you weren’t feeling your best and he would make sure to take you to his favourite places within Mumbattan in hopes that it’ll help you by even just a little bit. After all he’s aware of the concept that fresh air and a change of pace were beneficial to a better mental health, and all he wants was for you to feel better, even if it was by a little that would mean a whole lot to him.

Hobie would want you to have a change of scenery from the hustle and bustle you subjugate yourself to on an daily basis to somewhere less noisy and loud within any aspect.

Sure it’s not his kind of scene but for you and how much work you put on yourself just to come home, looking as though any minute you were going to collapse? It was worth seeing you gradually become more relaxed and at peace to the point you fall asleep against his shoulder and he has to carry you back home.

again Hobie didn’t care since he knew how much sleep you missed out on and would not hesitate to get you a few days off if he feels as though you workplace was taking the piss out of you by thinking you were expendable.

He ain’t having none of that shit when it came to you.

Hobie wasn’t about to let you work yourself to the bone and not get a single thanks nor your flowers for busting your ass.

You tell him that it doesn’t bother you as you were doing what your job entails but Hobie more or less your backbone within these sorts of situations because he didn’t want you being taken advantage of just because you were ‘hard working.’ Not to say you aren’t but Hobie was more then well aware that this was often the excuse given when some shit stain wanted to offload their work onto someone else for personal gain.

It was always the ones who worked the least or didn’t work at all that got the appraisal and the promotions.

So Hobie would always and I mean ALWAYS praise you for everything you’ve done for he doesn’t believe you hear it enough for his liking.

Also he’s great with advice so when the days were particularly rough, he’d probably drop a bit of sage advice in regards to any aspect that you were finding hard to cope with like; ‘while the aspiration to save everyone is admirable; it’s unrealistic. For you’re setting yourself up to traverse down a road where instead of pointing out the problem, you are made to believe that you are the problem. Instead of trying to save everyone, focus on saving one person at a time for that one person could be someone else’s everything.’

Being the absolute secret sweetheart that he is, Miguel would try and help take the weight off of your shoulders and make your life a whole lot more easier by performing small acts of service that he knows you’ll greatly appreciate.

Even if it was the minuscule things such as; making you your favourite beverage, setting up a relaxing bath/ shower. fluffing up the pillows, smoothing the creases out of the duvet, cooking your favourite food since you always tell him that one of the things you always loved coming home to was the smell of his cooking. Hell do it all if it made you happy.

Miguel defiantly pampers you on the days where you felt more fatigued from your dual jobs. He doesn’t want you to do anything for you’ve already done enough to warrant yourself some much needed rest.

He lives to serve his beloved and would reject your requests to help him by planting kisses to your lips until you ultimately accept his pampering with little to no complaint.

If you were in the spider society, he’d give you time off because he’s the boss and all and if you were to go against his request for you to take time for yourself, he’d threaten to double it even though he was seriously considering it with how obvious tightroping two jobs was negatively effecting you.

Miguel doesn’t want you to overwork yourself but will overwork himself…what a hypocrite.

Soft Miguel is only soft with you.

[seeker-of-stories19]

Season 6 Pt. 2 Kiaz Thoughts

- Miguel wants to share a room with Robby so badly and they both looked so disappointed it didn’t work out

- Miguel’s “Robby’s gonna be fine” is like fifty percent jealousy over the insinuation that Robby would still have feelings for Tory and fifty percent thinking he can fix everything with sheer willpower

- I don’t mind Miguel being jealous of Robby being captain at all I think it’s pretty expected he would feel that way I just hope they don’t sacrifice his growth as a character for more petty drama

- Miguel having fully turned away from all the strike first bullshit he internalized at the beginning of the show and saying he doesn’t agree with it at all- I love growth

- Miguel being so worried about Robby over the challenge

- I so wish Robby had won the challenge with Kwon, he did so good and coming in second again is not going to be good for his confidence

- Miguel standing up for Robby in the hotel room after the challenge made me so happy, even though he’s clearly having feelings about the whole thing as well

- Miguel being so betrayed that Robby knew about Kreese and didn’t tell him, everything they’re doing is giving off boyfriend vibes

- I was happy to see Robby standing up for himself when Sam says he lied to them and saying that wasn’t a fair thing for her to say, I don’t think he would’ve done that in past seasons

- Robby looking to Miguel for support when everyone turns against him

- So annoyed we couldn’t get Kiaz sharing a bed

- Although Robby looking over at Miguel in the middle of the night all wistfully was almost as good

- Miguel paying enough attention to Robby to notice him leaving even in the middle of the night

- Okay why can Robby never get a fucking break, only on the first episode and he’s being crushed at every opportunity

- Miguel is salty about the rooms and probably even more so about sharing with Eli and not Robby

- Miguel wanting to keep Robby safe for the challenge but he’s also taking the lead over Robby, clearly he’s having feelings but it totally just coming off as jealousy about Tory even if it gets in everyone’s heads

- Miguel checking in on Robby mid fight

- Miguel is so worried about Robby and clearly notices that he’s not just lost a couple matches but isn’t fighting how he normally does at all

- Although he’s obviously jealous about both Tory and the captaincy as well I’m glad to get all these little moments with the two of them showing that their relationship has deepened so much

- It’s also not fair that Robby went into the tournament with everyone on his team wishing he wasn’t captain, obviously he’s struggling and feeling insecure and he knows that no one else would’ve wanted him in that position which is only going to make him more stressed

- Miguel is totally looking at Robby in that towel

- Casual physical affection, even in that awkward moment Robby sees Miguel is upset and tries to offer some support

- Robby is so affected by his emotions while fighting, every time he’s lost it’s been because he was ‘off balance’ emotionally and it’s sad to see him struggling so much again

- I’m definitely hoping Miguel is the one to give him the encouragement and confidence he needs to win but not sure if it’ll shake out that way right now

- Johnny projecting his trauma onto all of them is definitely not going to help Miguel or especially Robby who are so tangled up in his mess and have been hurt by him so many times already

- I actually liked that moment of Miguel telling Robby he should listen to his own advice, he’s pissed but he knows Robby is off balance and needs to fix it to win

- I’m really sad that one of the first scenes Robby and Miguel have ever shared where it was just the two of them had to be a fight but I’m glad they have the kind of relationship where they talk now even if things are rough they both have a point

- I do appreciate that Miguel is genuinely upset and not just trying to get the captaincy, I genuinely think he would be happy for and support Robby if he stepped up and really fought how Miguel knows he’s capable of (even if he’s still disappointed)

- On that note I also think Miguel knows Robby well enough to know that’s not actually going to do anything for Robby besides making him feel worse, he’s just too angry to care

- Really hoping Miguel comes back and takes Devon’s spot at some point

- Just thinking how Robby must be worried about the baby now too and even if I understand why he stayed he must feel othered from their ‘family’ all over again

- Also obsessed with the canon confirmation that Robby doesn’t drink

- I’m happy to see Miguel finally being in a place where he can call Johnny on his BS not to mention the fact that he remembers those details Johnny told him about Robby’s childhood and seems a lot more aware of how badly that affects him than most of the characters

- I kind of figured Robby was going to drink after that comment and I’m not surprised but I’m really worried about how that’ll turn out with how much he’s obviously struggling

- While it’s obviously not Sam’s responsibility I do wish she’d taken Robby seriously when he said he was thinking about drinking, he’s obviously not the type to make a joke like that lightly and I wish she’d realized

- I’m actually really glad Johnny talked to Miguel, especially about Robby, I think with how he’s feeling over it he needed someone to point out some of the facts of the situation like how Robby doesn’t have anything else going for him, in order for that to fully sink in

- Not happy that they’re acting like Robby went and slept with some random girl by choice, genuinely nothing like him and he was obviously way too drunk to consent

- The way Miguel says Robby’s name when he’s upset about losing the match was so sweet

- Finally things are looking up for Robby!!! Literally all he needed was encouragement and for someone to genuinely believe in him and follow his lead and Miguel gave that to him in the absolute best way, I’m so happy

- Miguel intentionally taking Robby in and telling him “you’ve got this” to boost his confidence

- Not to mention Miguel cheering his boyfriend on during his matches

- Miguel’s being the one who gives Robby the confidence to follow his heart is like everything I’ve ever dreamed of for them

- I swear for a second after that match I thought Robby and Miguel were going to kiss

- Miguel’s face when Robby beats Kwon was incredible

- Another Kiaz hug!!!!!!

- Robby is such a good person, he tries so hard to do the right thing and when he messes up he takes accountability and tries to make it right

- Miguel in that striped yellow sweatshirt is so perfect, literally he’s such a sunshine

- Miguel being so encouraging to Robby is everything I’ve ever wanted

- Miguel stepping in when Kwon hurts Robby

- Robby and Miguel are such a good team

- I fully thought Kwon was going to stab Robby and he would have to drop out and Miguel would win another tournament but that was quite the twist

- I don’t know what else to say I just can’t believe that ending, but I’m incredibly relieved both my boys are alright

[oatmealdaydreams]

Hold Me Before I Drown

Let me know if you wanna be added on or taken off the taglist!

Pairing: Intruality

Warnings: abandonment issues, touch-starvation, insecurity, chronic pain, pining, unreality

Description: Patton, as the Heart, can sense when the Others are hurting. He starts feeling the odd tug of something he’s unsure about, and he belatedly realizes who’s been hurting. Remus hates his traitorous, painful hand as it renders him unable to use it for the time being. High Pain Days, or even Weirdly-In-the-Middle Pain Days, are always the worst when he’s been left alone.

Extra: Day 1 of @intrualityweek! Prompts are Fear & Realization.

[Masterlist] | ao3 link

[fic under the cut]

Something tugs painfully in Patton’s chest, right where he feels what’s wrong with the Others. 

Remus doesn’t care, he doesn’t , it’s always like this and most of them don’t know, anyway. 

Something tugs painfully in Patton’s chest, right where he feels what’s wrong with the Others. 

Patton can feel when something’s wrong with the Others. He is the Heart , after all. Emotions are his job! It’s a little cavity of swirling emotions and feelings right on the underside of his heart. Every Side feels different. When it’s Logan, there’s an odd poking of wiring or writhing fire that wants nothing more than to burn . With Janus, it’s not always as noticeable as he wishes it were when there’s flakes of plastic masks swimming in salty waters—tears, more like, he’d guess—or there’s the smoothness of scales slithering around in the little cavity. The reason why it’s not as noticeable as it sounds is because, well, he usually feels the ghost of a slithering snake in his chest. 

He needs to talk to Janus about that, but it’ll have to wait until later. 

Another tug in the cavity. Patton frowns as he sets the bowl of batter down on the kitchen counter. 

When it’s Virgil who’s feeling upset, it’s like millions of tiny spiders crawling around. Or, when it gets really bad, there’s nothing but a shadowy emptiness . The emptiness always worries him because he felt those same empty shadows in his chest right before Virgil had...well. Right before he’d, um, ‘disappeared’ before they all got him back. 

They’re past that now, and Patton hasn’t felt the emptiness in a long time. 

With Roman— god , Roman. It’s always so cold when it’s Roman. Like with Janus, he’s always feeling a sense of chilly ice in his chest. It’s...he worries about Roman. He’s so strong and good , but he doesn’t know how to ask for help. Patton knows, with guilt pressing against his tongue, that he’s part of the reason Roman’s afraid of asking for things. He’s working on it now. He’s listening to Roman now. It’s getting better. Slowly, but still getting better . 

Patton sighs, leaning against the counter as he sets the wooden spoon into the bowl of batter. 

He doesn’t know what Remus’ hurt and upset feels like. He doesn’t know a lot of things about Remus, if his Christmas gift to him says anything. Patton smiles at the memory of Remus getting excited over it anyway, though he lightly grimaces at one of the Duke’s...less conventional suggestions of what he could fry in the airfryer. All he hopes is that Remus got as much use out of it as he possibly could. As long as it makes him happy, right?

He doesn’t know who the tug belongs to. It’s painful, yes, and sharp like spikes and blades. If he were to guess , it could be from one of the twins. Roman’s is usually cold, but who says the sharp tug isn’t just a different form of hurt from the Prince? It could be Remus’, but why would he ever feel so…like this? Remus isn’t affected by anything! He's got this uncaring attitude—not that he doesn’t care, he cares so much about everyone in his own way, especially where Roman’s involved—and how he lets every little thing bounce off him like it’s nothing. There’s no way it could be Remus! Remus doesn’t get all mopey and sad or numb or upset. He doesn’t get like this ...right? Well, Patton doesn’t know him that well, but surely Remus wouldn’t be so...hurt. 

His chest tugs again, but this time it’s more like something tugging on him than the sharpness of spikes. It’s like—Patton’s heart clenches for an entirely different reason now. It’s like...like a little kid tugging on their parents’ clothes because they’re scared . Is...is Remus scared ? Can Remus get scared? Well, he’s as humanoid as the rest of them—minus the kraken-like tendencies, he supposes—so it’d make sense that he could get hurt. But Remus? Really? Why would—

A sharper, more urgent tug in his chest nearly sends Patton bumping into the counter. 

Oh.

Oh.

Oh, no. Oh, kiddo, no.

Something smells like it’s burning, and it’s definitely not the cookie batter. 

Oh, god.

Patton sinks out immediately, leaving the cookie batter on the counter to go search for the Duke of the Mindscape. 

=====

Remus doesn’t care, he doesn’t , it’s always like this and most of them don’t know, anyway.

It’s fine. It’s fucking fine, okay? No one knows. He doesn’t have to be all mopey and sad and shit out there because no one knows, and if they did know, they wouldn’t get it. Roro’s the only one who might get it, but he already does so much for Remus. He and Remus can finally bond after so long of being separated. It’s amazing and good, it is, he loves his brother so much and he wouldn’t trade that little dork for anything . If Roro saw him all mopey, he’d sprawl all over him and squish him wonderfully into the abyss so he can be again. They’ve got some of the same shit. They’re twins. They used to be One. They’ve got the same kind of shitty shit-shit. Shit all around. Shit, shit, shit. 

Remus huffs a small laughter at his brain as it repeats that word over and over. 

Shit, shit, shit. 

It’s a funny word. 

Remus winces, frowning as his hand jolts in sharp pain. It spreads rapidly all throughout the bones and joints in his hand. Remus whines softly, clutching his stupid hand to his chest. 

Roro just left. He was here because he felt Remus hurting and having bad pains in his fucking hand. He helped with getting him situated in soft things and as comfortable as he could be—Remus holds his hurting hand with the okay one—and asked his brother if he needed him to stay. He always asks that, to be fair. ‘Do you want me to stay?’ he’ll say, ‘Want me to take care of you, Re?’ Remus refuses him unless it’s really bad. Sometimes, his bones are trying to break and crack and tear themselves out of his skin. When that happens, Roman won’t leave even if Remus tries to get him to. He knows Remus needs help , and because he’s so good and he’s Roman , he’s gentle and caring and Remus loves him. 

But it’s not that bad this time. Just a little extra than it typically is. Remus can manage on his own. 

Besides, Roman got summoned by Thommy Salami, so there’s very little chance he’d come back for a while. It doesn’t matter that they’re brothers or that he’s in pain or if Roman can still feel how much it hurts . It doesn’t matter because meetings with Thomathy are still important , and it’s not like Remus doesn’t have practice dealing with this by himself. 

It’s fine. 

Remus ignores the faint hiss from the shadowed corners of his room. Jannie’s not here , stupid brain. He’s probably out plotting some fun little scheme, or, more accurately, lounging in soft sweats and binging Scooby Doo movies again. 

It’s fucking��fine . 

Pain shots through his hand again as he whimpers quietly, curling up further in his bed. High Pain Days are so fucking dumb . It’s even a high pain level, it’s not like that . It just hurts more than normal. It’s not—it’s not . This is fine. He’ll just curl up into a little kraken cube and stay here, alone, in pain, and it’s so fine that he’s alone right now . 

Remus closes his eyes shut, squeezing, as his hand twitches and sparks another sharp spike of pain in his fingers. He turns his head into his pillow, breathing out shakily. There’s a soft whoosh of someone rising up, but he dismisses it. Ro-bro wouldn’t be finished yet, it takes time for the creative process to go go go. No one else would come to check on him, especially not Virgil or Patton . Patton hardly knows him. He’s...he hardly knows him. And Virgil doesn’t want to spend time with him right now. To be fair, he did pour a bucket of slime when he was hoodie-less, so...pranks do that. It’s not normally a big deal, Virgil just needs some self-time to recover from prank wars and peopling, he gets that. But it still hurts . Why does it hurt? Why’s Remus so fragile? He’s the conduit and vessel for Intrusive Thoughts! He’s a scary gremlin, he can’t be fragile. Besides, not even Janus likes messy Duke-krakens. 

Another sharp prick in the back of his hand that aches , and Remus whimpers again. He doesn’t dare let the tears at the edges of his eyes fall. He’s being messy right now and he needs to stop being messy because then the Others will eventually ask about things and they won’t understand and—and—

A weight sinks next to him on the mattress, and he buries his face deeper into his pillow. He must be imagining someone there. No one would come for him, not right now, not now . He’s just imagining someone because he’s so lonely . His hand aches in all the wrong places, and he gasps painfully. He aches, but it’s not just his traitorous bones that hurt . 

“Um, Remus? Buddy, you okay?” the imaginary voice asks, gentle, soft, so soft , “Come on, let me see you. Show me what’s hurting, buddy.”

Remus curls up tighter. It—it sounds like Patton . It can’t be, he wouldn’t be here , he doesn’t like him, he’s always so uncomfortable around Remus, he wouldn’t be here . 

“I know I don’t know you as well as I’d like to—” Patton wouldn’t want him, this is imaginary, it’s in his head, it is , “—but I care, okay? I do. I know I’m not good at showing you, but I do .” 

Not real, not real, not real—

“C’mon, Remus—oh, oh, hey , it’s okay, baby, it’s okay.”

Remus flinches away from the warm, warm hand on his shoulder that soon retracts, keening, whimpering, because real things are warm but this isn’t real , it isn’t . Patton’s not here, he’s not, he’s not, he’s not , why’d he be here? He wouldn’t , and it aches so badly . 

“Shh, baby,” and the petname buries itself into a soft part of Remus’ chest, making it flutter in hesitant hope, “It’s okay, you’re safe, baby. It’s just me, it’s Patton, I came to help, buddy, that’s all. I’m here to help you.”

Oh fucking Christ, oh god. Please be real , please don’t be real, please, please, please.

“Oh, sweetheart, I know it hurts,” the imaginary Patton whispers close to him as Remus makes a desperate noise. “I can feel it, baby, I know.” 

He can what ?

“I don’t know where, but I can sense it, baby. You’re hurting, and I wanna take care of you. Let me take care of you, please?” 

Remus hurts and aches so much, he wants to be taken care of, he wants Patton , but he knows Patton wouldn’t want him. Not the real Patton, anyway. 

But he hopes.

“You’re not re al ,” Remus’ voice is quiet and small and cracking as he tries .

There’s shuffling on the mattress, and now the imaginary Patton is silent. Fuck , he fucked up. Patton was in his head and not real, and now he’s gone . Remus shudders as he cries into his pillow. He’s gone because he was never really there to begin with and now he’s alone again, truly, so fucking lonely and he deserves to be, doesn’t he? He fucked up, god , what the fuck is wrong with him? What’s so wrong with everything Remus is that he can’t just leave things be instead of fucking everything up ? 

A soft noise and warm hand on his shoulder again. 

His breath hitches from how warm it is. It’s—the hand—

Real? Are you real? Really real?

“Oh, Remus…of course , I’m real,” the voice is back, it’s there, it’s there , “C’mon, baby, open your eyes. Look at me, come see me.” 

And because Remus is a messy, weak bastard, he hopes .

He turns his head slightly out of the pillow, and he opens his eyes. 

“There you go, baby,” Patton says, he sees him, that’s Patton and he’s real , “You see now, yeah? I’m right here, I’m real, sweetheart.” 

Remus stares at him as his breath hitches. The hand— Patton’s hand, he belatedly realizes—rubs smoothing circles on his shoulder. It’s so warm, it’s so warm , oh god, it’s real and there and Patton’s there and he’s real and he’s here .

“P-Patt’n?” Remus is clumsy with words. 

“Yeah, sweetheart, it’s me,” Patton’s voice is tender and kind ...oh no, oh no . 

“You’re here?” 

“Yeah, I’m here, I’m right here.”

“You’re here .”

“Yes, Re— oh , baby, it’s okay, it hurts, I know.”

Remus’ stupid, fucking hand shoots up in pain that engulfs the entire thing, and he can’t stop the whine that slips from his lips. Patton spots the way he clutches his hurting hand tighter to his chest. Remus sniffles and sluggishly realizes tears are falling down his face. 

Stupid, stupid, stupid .

“Can I touch you, baby?” Patton is so caring . 

“I—I don—”

“It’s okay if not, baby, I just wanna take care of you.”

Remus hesitates, but a pained noise helps him make a decision, “ Please ?”

“Oh, sweetheart, of course. I have you now, it’s alright, just gonna move you a little, okay?”

Remus can hardly think once he feels Patton scoop him up in his arms and hold him tenderly. He’s so warm , he’s holding him in his lap , and it’s warm , so warm, too warm, not warm enough, warm —

A hand cups the back of his neck as he hides in the crook of Patton, making him gasp and breathe . 

“ That’s it, baby, breathe. Try breathing for me, okay?” 

Remus gasps and gasps for breath, his lungs trying to hoard it all in big gulps of air. His hand twitches as he shivers from the overwhelming warmth that burns his body, pressed tendering against Patton. It’s real, it’s all real . Patton’s here and taking care of him. He cares , oh fucking god , Patton cares . He buries himself deeper into the fatherly persona desperately, chasing after the warm feeling that makes his stomach squirm. 

“I’ve got you, Remus, it’s alright. I didn’t realize ...baby, you’ve been hurting for a while, haven’t you?”

Remus nods silently, not trusting his voice to speak without breaking. He keeps shivering . He’s so cold, and Patton’s so, so warm. 

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t realize you could hurt. I’m here now, okay? I’ve got you now.” 

“...not leavin’?” Remus asks, stumbling as fear leaks through his voice. 

Patton’s heart clenches, “No, I’m not leaving, I’ll stay, I’m staying, baby.” 

“Pat…”

“Yeah, Remus?”

“P-Pat—”

“ Oh , shh, baby, it’s okay.” 

“ Hurts .”

“I know, baby, c’mon, it’s alright.” 

Remus is crying fully now, red-rimmed eyes and sniffling nose and desperate babbling about his hurting hand. Why is he like this right now? He can usually handle it fine on his own. It’s not even a High Pain Day! 

Then Patton cards a hand through his hair as the grey fog of loneliness stutters in response. 

Oh.

Oh.

Oh, fucking god.

Shit .

It takes a while for him to be able to form words that aren’t just ‘hurts’ or ‘warm’ . It takes even longer for him to slump in Patton’s hold, tired, messy, and very much not sure if he could handle separating from him. The moral Side’s hand keeps carding through his hair, steady and grounding. His hand still twitches and aches and hurts , but with all the affection from Patton, it feels more manageable without the threat of grey on the edges of his vision. 

“That was a lot, huh?” Patton mumbles as he holds Remus tightly. 

“Uh-huh,” is all Remus mutters, eyes closed as he embraces the warmth. 

“Does your hand still hurt?”

“Mm.”

“Does it—is it always like that?”

“Mm, yeah. ‘S fine, though. Jus’ gotta deal with it.”

Patton frowns, “What?”

“Gots chronic pain, Pat-Pat. ‘S all the time.”

“Oh, baby...that explains the tugging…”

Remus sobers up a little at that, opening his eyes to glance up at Patton, “The what?” 

“Well—okay, it’s not easy to explain, um…” a sigh, “Y’know how I’m the Heart and stuff?”

“Yeah…?”

“Well, a part of being the Heart is sensing—uh, more like feeling others’ emotions. Like, I can feel when everyone’s hurting or upset.” 

Hold on, wait a minute, back up . 

He can fucking what now?

“Sometimes, I feel when Roman’s cold,” he continues, even though Remus.exe has stopped working, no thoughts for him, nope, he’s still wrapping his head around Patton being able to sense when they’re all upset , “Or when Logan isn’t doing so good. I had this tugging thing, all sharp and stuff or, like, pulling for my attention. I thought it might’ve been Roman , but…”

Patton pauses when he sees Remus gaping and staring at him. 

“Remus? Baby, what is it?”

“You…” Remus swallows, ignoring the small blush on his face from the petname, “You know ? You feel the hurt?” 

“Yeah, buddy, I— whoa , okay, I’ve got you!” 

Patton nearly falls backwards as Remus flinches hard . Sharp pain rockets through his hand everywhere, in every bone, in every joint, and he feels as though it may rip away from his body. He doesn’t have the energy to bite back a curse under his breath. 

“Oh, sweetheart ...do you have meds that help? Pain killers, anything?” 

Remus shakes his head, “No, none of ‘em work for me.” 

Patton makes a sympathetic noise, hand scritching lightly against his scalp as it cards through his hair. 

“I’m sorry, that’s gotta be tough, sweetheart.”

“Yeah, it’s—’s...how’re you so warm ?” 

“Warm?” Patton asks, confused. 

“Mhm, you’re all warm.”

Remus’ eyes glaze over when Patton scritches and cards his hand more firmly in his hair. Oh , he’s cold. Remus is cold .

“Oh, you poor baby,” Patton mutters, tightening his hold on the Duke in his arms. “I’ll share my warmth, c’mon.” 

Remus shudders as he’s held so tenderly and kindly by Patton, unable to process anything more than the warmth surrounding his body and his bones and his aching heart. God , it’s worse because it’s Patton, and it’s better because it’s Patton . 

“Warm, warm —”

“Yeah, come take some of my warmth, Remus. It’s alright,” he reassures. 

Remus’ glazed eyes flutter, ready to shut now that he’s all cuddled into the fatherly persona. His hand reminds him of its painful presence, but it only brings out a soft whine this time as the warmth chases away the last remains of the icy grey. 

“You can sleep. If you need to sleep, go ahead. I’ve got you, I’m not going anywhere, baby,” a soothing mumble buries itself pleasantly in Remus’ brain. 

Remus, though very tired, blushes a dusty pink at the petname again. 

Patton notices, “You okay, sweetheart?”

Remus nods, “Mhm, jus’, um...name?”

Patton blinks before a fond smile stretches across his face.

“‘Sweetheart’, ‘Baby’? Are those—can I call you that, Remus?”

Remus just buries his face away as his cheeks heat up a little more, humming a ‘yes’ . Patton’s smile widens, somehow, and he plants a light kiss on top of the Duke’s head of tousled hair. It brings out a quiet gasp and the thrumming of a heart. Remus nearly freezes, but Patton presses a firmer kiss to his hair, and he melts . Slumping in his friend’s—friend? Lover? Something else? He doesn’t know anymore—grasp, which causes a chuckle to rumble through the moral Side’s chest. 

“We’ll figure it out later, okay? Just rest now, baby,” Patton whispers into Remus’ hair as the little cephalopod’s eyes flutter shut. 

Patton holds him tightly, firmly, steady. He doesn’t waver. He’s safe there, in his whatever-the-hell’s arms, in the confines of his messy room, where his hand won’t stop hurting but a softer part of his chest does . 

With the grey away and him edging on sleep, a small part of his mind cheers as it goes ‘he cares’ .

Taglist: @lost-in-thought-20 @thegoldenduckie @not-sure-what-im-feeling

[ginjithewanderer]

[Tetora Nagumo] What I Like 4☆ — The Back of a Man Among Men

Writer: Nishioka Maiko || Season: Winter Character appearances: Tetora, Arashi

"What about you, Tetora-kun? Have you found anything you like yet?"

Translation under the cut

Tetora: Hmhmhmm…♪ I’m back~

Arashi: Oh? Tetora-kun, welcome back.

Arashi: Are you done with work already? You're back surprisingly early. Didn't you say you might be late? I thought for sure that you wouldn’t be back until late at night.

Tetora: Ossu. That's what I thought, too, but I got done earlier than I expected~

Arashi: I see. Well, I'm glad you got done without any troub—

Arashi: Kyaah!

Tetora: Woah!? Wh-what's wrong? You startled me just yelling all of a sudden, y'know?

Arashi: Tetora-kun, this is bad! Your ear! Your earlobe!

Tetora: Huh?

Arashi: Your earlobe is bleeding!

Tetora: Hm…?

Tetora: Ah, it really is. My piercing hasn't healed all the way yet, so I guess it might be bleeding because my earring got caught on my clothes or something.

Arashi: Uh-uh. You can't just wipe it off so casually like that! What if it gets infected!?

Arashi: Okay. Come here. I'll give you a hot soak.

Tetora: H-'hot soak'…? What's that? It sounds kinda like 'hot soup' in English, so I guess it's something yummy?

Arashi: Nope. A hot soak is when you use warm salt water on the affected area to help it heal better.

Arashi: Piercings are delicate, so you can't use regular disinfectants.

Arashi: Don't worry, this won't hurt. Come on, come here and sit still.

Tetora: Ossu. I'll take you up on that, then.

Arashi: Dab, dab…And, there.

Arashi: Oh? This earring…It's not the one you usually wear, is it?

Tetora: Ah, yeah. Today's work was kinda formal, so I wore this clear one that isn't really visible from a distance.

Tetora: I wonder if this piercing is even worth it for me if it’ll keep getting caught in my clothes~. It probably started bleeding because it got caught on something in a weird way.

Arashi: Hmm, that is strange. I wonder if it keeps getting caught on things because you’re not used to it yet.

Arashi: You can’t take the earring out until it heals up, though, or the hole will close up…

Arashi: I know. How about we go shopping for new ones the next time we’re free? I’ve been meaning to look for some small ones for myself, too.

Arashi: I can recommend you a shop, but would you be okay with that?

Tetora: Oh. Can I? If it’s one you recommend, I wanna go, too!

Arashi: That’s decided, then ♪ Let’s go out the next time we’re free.

Arashi: Kyaah ♪ All of them are so cute. With this many choices, I’ll never be able to decide.

Arashi: Oh, well~. Even though there are so many cute things, I want to save money this month…They’re all so tempting.

Arashi: Ah, I can’t get distracted and have fun on my own like this. I’m not here to shop for myself today.

Arashi: What about you, Tetora-kun? Have you found anything you like yet?

Tetora: U~myu. Let me think…Ah, these are nice and simple.

Tetora: I like this kinda thing, but I don’t know how fashionable they are…

Tetora: I don’t really have much of a fashion sense. That’s why I wanna hear your opinion. What do you think of these?

Arashi: Hey. You don’t need to worry about every little thing like that. After all, the most important part of fashion is wearing what you like!

Arashi: Besides, it’s not like you don’t have a good fashion sense. These earrings are nice, aren’t they? I think they’ll suit you.

Tetora: You think so? If they have your seal of approval, I’ll get them~♪ That said, which ones do you like, Narukami-senpai?

Arashi: Me? Well—

Arashi: I like these, and earrings like these are nice, too…Ah, these! I like these ones. Mmm, it’s too bad I can’t buy them. I’ll have to come back when I have some more money.

Arashi: Oh, well, that’s okay. Our main goal today was to get you some earrings. We did achieve that.

Tetora: Ossu. I’ll go pay for these, then!

Arashi: Okaaay, see you in a bit. I’ll go look around that clothing store over there. Please do call out to me once you’re done.

Arashi: I’m so glad you could find something you like.

Tetora: Ossu! It’s just as I’d expect from a store you like. All the accessories there were designed really well. It was really neat.

Tetora: I wanna go there again. Thank you so much!

Arashi: Hehe. Just hearing you say that makes it feel worth recommending it to you.

Tetora: —Also, here.

Arashi: Huh? What’s this package?

Tetora: It’s thanks for today. I’m sorry it’s so small.

Arashi: Huh!? You don’t need to thank me, though!

Arashi: But…thank you. I’m glad. Is it okay if I open it?

Tetora: Of course!

Arashi: —Oh, my! These are the earrings I liked from that store! When did you…

Tetora: Heheh. I’m not great at giving presents, so I wasn’t sure what would be good enough as thanks, but…

Tetora: Obviously, you’d want to give anyone something they’d like, right? That’s why I didn’t buy anything beforehand. I just quietly did my research and bought these earlier.

Arashi: …You’re amazing, Tetora-kun.

Tetora: Huh? Did you say something, Narukami-senpai?

Tetora: Ah! Are these not good enough as a thank you!?

Arashi: Nope. Not at all. I’m really happy with these. Thank you so much. I’ll treasure them ♪

Tetora: I’m really glad you like them! Let’s go home, then.

Arashi: (Mm~…And I thought you were still just a cute junior. I really look forward to what the future holds for you…♪)

Tetora: ? Narukami-senpai, what’s wrong~? You almost got left behind, y’know~?

Arashi: Yeah, yeah. I’m coming, Tetora-kun!

[thisdreamplace]

🍁 hello maple anon here again!

just wanted to share some experiences and questions , your advice helped me so much especially the crush one💗🌺the best outcome ended up for me and I’m forever greatful.

question , I recently found out a ex friend is still talking about me , saying I’m brainwashing people and even manipulating others and a bunch of false information about a year old situation and that I’m secretly evil , I left the friend group because all they’d do is talk shit about others and even switched up on me I decided to leave for my own mental health and one of the friends still remained friends with one of the people who falsely shit talked me and even acknowledged that they where lying but still remained friends.

and I decided to cut contact but I wish them a well life , their not obligated to stop being friends with them and I’m not obligated to be their friend , I found myself happier and healthier rather being revengeful , being kind and letting go and wishing them a well life , but apparently they are still speaking about me.

how should I cope with this?, I am currently not going to distract myself from these emotions and process them and let them stay as much as they need too.

but the fear of being doxxed, personal info being leaked and even a false statement posted about me online and it’s bombarded my mind and affecting me, I have terrible ocd and paranoid schizophrenia which heightens things even more. I feel like something bad will happen and I’m unsafe if I attempt to move on.

I feel like they’re stalking me and harassing me and that this is karma .

My questions are.

what would you do in my situation.

how would you process these emotions?

how would you reassure yourself that your safe without constant reassurance from others.

how would you move on from this without constantly feeling like it’ll come back and you’ll be lied about again?

how to truly move on with love and not revenge.

and my last , how do you remove the fear of loosing friends over this

thank you dream , you deserve the entire world and love , you guidance has helped me so much and it means the world to me .

hiii maple anon <3 i’m always glad to hear from you!

im glad that my advice has helped you a lot :’) it makes me happy to know things went well <3

for one, in your situation, which is heavy one especially alongside the mental health issues you mentioned is,.. LOG OUT! GET OFF LINE! i think that scrolling can heighten our anxiety, and if you’re worried about all of those happenings online, log out. you need to go out, breathe fresh air, and remember there is SO much more to life. this thing that you’re worried about happening isnt going to happen most likely, but you’re already feeling the pains as if it has passed because of your fears surrounding it! i get that, actually. we’re more similar than you know! but in those moments, all you can do is breathe and let go.

i would process the emotions by feeling them all out, letting them well up inside me and feel how uncomfortable and scary it all is. and then realizing how, i’m still here. and i’m still breathing and i can keep moving forward. the only way out, is through. so let yourself feel how terrifying it all is, cry it out if you need to, then move on. truly, truly move on. like that, you can build more trust in yourself and feel that safety net that is already yourself, the home within yourself that will always be there for you to return to.

at the end of the day, revenge is in no one’s favor including your own! would you really want to hurt them by hurting yourself? with every message you send me, i always can tell that youre a person who truly wants the best for yourself. revenge isnt the way to get it… you move on with love by choosing yourself and doing it for you. not for anyone else.

i would allow myself to feel the fear of losing my friends, and if i truly do lose them, then it’s one of those things that i’d say so be it! if this a toxic situation for you, that your friends cant understand, then let them go. youll be making room for new friends who truly appreciate you, or the time apart will allow those friends of yours to realize what they’re missing and come back, acting in much more desirable way for you. either way, you win!

thank you so much for all of your kind words as always <3 xx

[earthry]

It looks like I might not be able to use my phone during the ritual? Which is strange to me but that’s what the venue says? They’re using yondr pouches?

I’m a little sad that I may not be able to take videos or pictures for memories. Still happy I’m going! But also,,,, I use my phone as a distraction to help me when I’m feeling overwhelmed and anxious. I’m a little worried about how it’ll affect my experience because at other concerts I get overstimulated quickly and need to vibe on my phone or chill?

Does anyone have any advice on what I can do to maybe help anxiety or overstimulation (besides earplugs— I will have those for sure)? This is my first ritual and idk what it’s like/what the crowd might be like?

[zorilleerrant]

Taking in the Sights

a @flashfictionfridayofficial prompt

Open your eyes.

Judge knows that voice. His head is pounding out a rhythm he’d really rather relax into that try to think past. Maybe they can go outside.

Open your eyes.

Only they were outside, weren’t they? He has a test later, so he really needs his sleep, and could you possibly wait like. Five minutes. Wait five minutes.

Paragon. Open your eyes.

Teke? Wait. Is he home? Judge would know if he’d gone home, wouldn’t he, he’d know that he wasn’t – is it a holiday?

It’s okay. It’ll be okay. But, Paragon, we need you to open your eyes.

No, that’s right, Teke came to visit him and then got – oh, fuck, he’d promised everyone would be safe if they came by to help and they didn’t even –

Judge opens his eyes, and they’re filled with sudden, burning light by someone who’s muttering deprecations and complaining about him wasting time. Which might well be true, given his healing factor, except also they don’t have any healers on staff in MiniCity, so who the fuck is blinding him in this infirmary?

He blinks. Blinks away sparkles and fuzz in his vision. Which is normal, at least, unlike the floating sensation, which Judge has to hope is from the fact that this was serious damage, and now he’s kind of worried someone’s holding something over on Eric because that’s not exactly usual behavior, especially with guests. Judge checks to see whether he’s actually floating, which hasn’t to date been a nervous response, but you never know.

Wait. He is home.

“I wouldn’t try to talk for another three or four minutes,” Teke says, which, yes, he knows the drill. This is like the third time Judge has done this.

He assumes it’s Teke. The colors are right, anyway, even though the costume is flat against his legs and the mask is off. The way Judge’s vision is swimming it might as well still be moving, though. He might throw up.

Teke tugs a basin closer and gently sets it next to him. Judge appreciates the thought. “I took you back to base. My base, I mean, not – we’ll send you back home when you’re ready. Unless you want to stay here for a minute.”

“Is everyone okay?” Judge asks. His voice sounds raw. It doesn’t hurt to talk, really, but it’s hard to understand himself, even though he knows what he meant to say.

“Well, it was kind of an emergency situation – yes, everyone is fine – and I had to call for backup. It’s all resolved, though. You can lie down.” Teke sounds worried. That’s not good. Like, Teke always sounds worried, but he sounds worried about Judge right now, which he doesn’t usually, except when it’s about school and stuff.

Maybe lying down is a good call.

Judge hasn’t actually been seriously injured since the whole power situation kicked in, and who knows how it’s going to affect him. He never got lit on fire before he got his powers, either, so that’s hardly going to tell him anything.

“You took me home,” Judge says, without thinking.

Teke glances off to the side, but there’s no one there. “Privacy, Paragon. There still aren’t a lot of us who know who you are.”

Judge laughs, even though it makes his head hurt. “I knew it. You did get curious.”

[cfs-crohns-colitis-warrior]

Fuck DWP and the benefits system. It’s so ducked up. Can’t have more than £6000 in savings or my benefits start to go down, so how am I ever supposed to save for anything? This includes having an ISA where the money can only be used to buy a house or for retirement.

I mean, I get they can only do so much and stuff, but the way everything is laid out is just so fucked up. It takes forever to even get benefits and a lot of people who need the give up trying to get them because it’s so damn difficult and there’s so many hoops to jump through.

I want to start my own business to try and earn a little so I don’t have to completely rely on benefits, but apparently the business account amount also counts towards my savings, which is ridiculous to me because it’s not my money, it’s the companies money. Sure, I own the company, but the money in that business account would purely be for reinvesting in the business, for buying more stock and materials. If the money were to be transferred to my personal account then it’d be mine, cause it’d be my wages, not that it would even be much. I just think it’s stupid.

Then there’s the fact that when I’m able to move in with my boyfriend, I don’t get treated as a separate person. It won’t be my savings only that affect my benefits, it’ll be our savings so I probably won’t get anything at all, which is insane because I can’t expect my boyfriend to pay for absolutely everything, all by himself. I need to be able to split the bills, especially since the majority of power used will be used by me since I’m always home. I need to be able to help pay for the food we eat and for my own stuff like my toiletries and any kind of entertainment I use to get me through the day so I’m not mindlessly staring out the window depressed all day because I can’t work. I can understand they want to take your partners earnings into account, but I should still be treated as an individual person. Sure, if I were to move in with a millionaire, done give me benefits, because as much as I’d like to be able to pay my own way with stuff it would be ridiculous to claim benefits while being with someone rich who can afford to pay for everything, even if you should be able to pull your own weight, which you would be doing if you were able to work properly. Unfortunately my boyfriend is not a millionaire (though I wouldn’t change a thing, I love him to pieces), and therefore will not be able to pay for everything all by himself. If I don’t get any benefits and I struggle running my own business, either in terms of sales or I’m terms of energy to keep it running in order to make anything to sell, then I’m stuck with nothing coming in and having to rely solely on my boyfriend, and that’s so unfair.

We need to be able to save for a house so we can live together. We need to be able to have savings in case anything goes wrong, like the boiler breaks or we have to pay for something in an emergency. We need to be able to pay for food, to pay the bills, to pay for the car for getting around, to pay for insurance etc. There’s so much stuff you have to pay for, and to have two people relying on one income that is only suitable for one person isn’t right.

Sorry, rant over, I just had to complain somewhere. Money is stressing me out and I’m worrying about the future and how we’ll manage everything. I want to enjoy the now but I’m just so stressed about the future and trying to plan things out it’s just not going that way at the moment. Fingers crossed my health improves and I can either get a normal job again or I can have enough energy to make my business a success and actually earn decent money to contribute to everything we want to pay for in the future.

Wishing everyone well and hoping things improve for everyone asap, especially for people struggling with their health, money, any struggles they’re currently facing tbh. I wish the world were a better place.

[minseologs]

intrusive ruminations

Looking at the pile of things she had to pack, most were replaceable in a way that once she lost them, she would not care in the world to even bother replacing it. A plain shirt, pants, some under clothes that would be helpful as a dressing if she bled out. It was as if Minseo never plans to return wherever it’ll take her. The last thing she needed to compress were medicines bandages, and space for all her weaponries. Cash can be stuffed anywhere. 

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of her house maid bringing in more things to consider. With a half-hearted smile, she brings up slow-perishable snacks she can have on the road including a collapsible water bottle. 

“This is strange. It’s like when you were little again, you know, when your father had a lot of attempts.” 

There was a small smile on her lips, remembering doing the same things when she was little because of how dangerous her father’s life was. They got the family once, in a car accident that left her with an injured back. It was those occurrences that made her wonder in ache if she would have the same life for Jinwoo today, or if the proximity with who she deals with nowadays would affect her loved ones like Wenhan’s presence in the house or Woori as her closest known kin .

“Minseo, it doesn’t have to be like this, you know. We’ll protect you, like everyone else who stayed,” the woman laughs and it amuses her how long she’s been with the family. “Look at me, I learned all sorts of fighting because of you.”

“I don’t know why you stayed. Let alone, even be around a family like us.” She huffs, “That’s not really a good thing... You were here since I was little and not once you ever went back to your life? Ten years and more, you’re like us. Having nine lives and all.” 

“I guess that’s what happens when you put loyalty on a Choi huh?” They share a short laugh, but Minseo admits she was too tense to be having a moment like this right now. “You don’t have to think that everything will end badly, you know.”

“I can’t risk that now...”

“I know it’s hard thinking this way.” The woman begins to neatly pack things for her, and everything must fit in that backpack alone. “You’ll only be leaving pain everywhere you go.”

“That’s already happening now, can’t you see?” she gets defensive with the thought, “The lingering attachments, sabotaging every good thing that came my way-- I’m so afraid of having happiness in my life that it turns to ego and pride that held me up. I’m trying to undo it but somehow it always comes around-- fuck, I can’t even begin to think about the thought of them hurting you. What then? They’re gonna get Wenhan, Woori, then Xian, everyone of my friends, until they get me? I don’t think this will ever end until I’m dead.” 

“This is one of those things you always carried. It’s not that you’re afraid of getting hurt. You’re afraid of those around you will get hurt simply because you exist. And unfortunately it comes with the job, my dear,” She was motherly, and rather someone Minseo needed at this very moment. “Give yourself credit, you’ve protected all of us in this house for as long as you could. Running away wont be the answer. You’ll be leaving many things.” 

“I’ve turned recluse.” 

“And yet you give it your all to fight those men who want you dead.”

She was taken aback, the first person to realize how much she was hiding from everyone. Her shoulders drop in recoil, showing trust in her. 

“If a second life existed where my family was happier, then perhaps the only thing I would ever worry is if my grades were good.” she was visibly saddened at the thought. “But then again, will who I know exist now? Will those I loved be by my side then? I like imagining those things.” 

“I’m sure your second life was something much different.” The woman finished packing her bag, stepping back near the door as it was her turn to sit. “You were still meant to be courageous with that one, I’m sure.”

It left a soothing feeling with her remark. Like it’s been coaxed out of her. The same hopefulness she always carries. She watches the woman bow, but interrupts her path.

“I left a copy of the will in the garden, with the tomatoes...” Her eyes were set on the woman, as if to beg that she no longer wished to put up a fight. “Wenhan will own the house.”

“No need. He will follow you I’m sure.”

“Nothing bad will happen, you think?” she pauses, comforting herself once more. “I’ve had a good life. Nothing bad will happen.” 

“Even if it did, you will know what to do then.”

[wondre]

A place to vent.

I haven’t need to vent or write what’s been happening in my life.. I’ve been through ups and downs.. but something so recent has made me need to write my thoughts somewhere.

It’s over the most stupidest thing.. but it’s making me so upset.. it’s all over a pair of shoes. They are down right UGLY. Like the most shittest thing ever created and the one person I love decided to buy them. ‘as a funny joke’ it wasn’t even a funny joke to begin with. Humour is not there strong point in life. They want to believe they are funny.. but they’re not and buying the shittest shoe on the market didn’t make me laugh, in fact it made me angry. Now they’re proceeding to wear said show OUT IN PUBLIC. Better yet they decided to wear it to an event that I hold important in my life… with many friends that attend and yes.. it’s just a shoe.. I get it.. but to me, doing somthing like that just shows that you don’t care how I feel.. I expressed to them that I would prefer them not to wear them.. and had alternate options.. but they decide to anyways and it really hurt. Now I have a whole different look upon them and really questioning if I want to continue our life together… yes.. OVER A FUCKING SHOE! I hate that my brain works like that.. but it’s the way it is.. major ick. Now I’m worried that they’ll continue to wear it to things… they’ve done it once.. why not again.. and it’ll just keep making me angry and embarrassed and I don’t know what to do.. because if I express how it’s making me feel they’ll just say I’m complaining over nothing, it doesn’t matter, each to their own.. blah blah blah.. all that stuff you say when you bicker.. but it’s not about that.. they’re not listening to me about how much it affects me. Yes.. a shoe is doing this to me. I can’t get over it.

I thought writing it down would help me feel better.. but it’s stressing me out more thinking about it.

[mybiasisexo]

Girl i just have so much to say so bear with me

I'm not gonna lie I love how complicated this whole story is because it surprises me every time with what they do and how it all turns out

First of all the peeps, Jongdae being so loud with his realizations made me laugh like dude was thinking out loud making everything more awkward lmao but i love him like that ❤️

baek is still the mvp, my guy, my true champ in this mess 🫶🏼🫰🏼🤘🏼 and poor nini he didn't do anything wrong he just loves his friends so much and wants them to be all together and happy 🥺

I loved the easter eggs like i thought wow jongdae still can't cook meat on a grill to save his life 😭

You're so good at conveying emotions and details, i felt the anxiety when Mel was trying to hide the marks of what happened and everyone was so nosey 😖

By the way when Mel said he took the ring i thought he took it forcibly against her wish but i didn't expect that at all, now i want to know what was Mel's reasoning behind the decision to give it back if it affected her that much to lose it 👀

Mel Mel i just want to smack her in the head, i mean chan has always been straight forward with his feelings (except for that one time he just left) and she just dived deeper into something she's still hesitant about and mislead chan into thinking she was ready to work it out smh

I love all the parallels and how they've both done similar things to each other, but their wounds are so deep that they cannot be fixed with a simple sorry, she still resents him too much to accept that she did a lot of damage too and the lack of communication just worsened the situation beyond repair 🤧

Oh and that last forehead kiss and soft thank you broke me I hope you know that 🙂

you said that it's almost over and it made me sad, what would I do without this amazing story, it's been going for so long and I've been following it since ch1 always looking forward to the new updates 😪

Anyways great chapter, I'm devastated 💔 I'm gonna go wrap myself in a blanket and cry, ily bye ❤️

Yay let’s go essay!!! 👏🏾👏🏾🥰

I was hesitant to post this chapter bc I was nervous about backlash. I knew it was gonna upset ppl but was scared folks were gonna drop it 😭. But seeing this fills me with relief 😮‍💨

Jongdae was a mess this whole chapter, I blame it on the weather 😂 and one thing he shouldn’t ever be is behind a grill lmao. Bbh is THE voice of reason but idt anyone is actually listening tho 😬. And nini is such a poor baby. The couple was really couple-ing when it came to bullying him 😭

I love getting compliments about my writing!!!! Esp this one, it’s such a high honor and helps with the imposter syndrome 😭🙌🏾

The drama with the ring oh boy. All imma say is they def have different stories on what went down that day and we haven’t even began to get into it 🙃

Mel needs a good shaking I can agree. Chanyeol has been so patient with her ☹️. Some would say she don’t deserve him 🚶🏾‍♀️

These two react so strongly with their emotions. And the thing I like about them both is that they never seem to realize just how badly their actions hurt each other until they voice it. Then they’re like ‘oh that was bad, huh?’ 😭

Don’t worry the last kiss messed me up too 🤕

I knoooow I can’t believe it’s almost over either. But I appreciate you sticking around! And am glad I can create something you can look forward to 🥲

So sorry for breaking you. I promise it’ll get better ❤️. Well….👀