#nct cheating fic

[revehae]

hurts so good (1)

pairing ↠ jeno x you x mark

genre .. warnings ↠ smut, unprotected sex, degradation, slapping, impact play, cheating

summary ↠ mark is too gentle for you in bed and when you share this problem with a mutual friend, jeno, he's more than willing to help you get off.

wc ↠ 4.2k

a/n ↠ this part one of a repost! i love this fic and it would be a sin to not share it with the world again. also i kinda love this banner… mark’s looking off to the side; jeno looks straight into the camera. it’s perfect

don’t like it, don’t read.

no matter how much you knew you loved mark, you couldn’t shake the itch you had. 

an itch that needed scratching. which he was not very good at doing.

mark kissed his way down your belly, trailing a gentle column of pecks to your thighs. you resisted a frown that desperately wanted to cling to your lips. for the past couple of weeks, your boyfriend had been attempting to initiate sex with you, but every time up until now, you had turned him down.

it wasn’t that you weren’t sexually attracted to mark or anything like that. first of all, you dumbfounded by how fine your boyfriend was. unbeknownst to him, every now and then, you would touch yourself to thoughts of him and mental images of his handsome little face.

the problem was that those fantasies tended to get you off harder than he did.

“you’re so pretty,” mark murmured, running a hand through your folds. you were wet - because your body couldn’t deny wanting him, much less when he put his hands on you - though not nearly as wet as you could have been.

mark didn’t need to know that. in fact, the only reason you had agreed to letting him fuck you now was because you didn’t want him to assume that you were cheating and had found more than adequate loving elsewhere (not that you had just yet). and maybe you were also a little sexually frustrated and you knew this was the closest to release you would get without actually seeking out another partner. mark was the love of your life and you never wanted to break his heart like that, so half the time you sucked it up and closed your eyes.

the sex was good. you would never deny that. but good wasn’t good enough.

mark dipped his head between your thighs, now starting to lap at your cunt which guaranteed a mind-blowing orgasm, and you let him have his way with you for a while.

one time, you told mark that you and a group of friends were competitively abstaining from having sex and foreplay was the sole thing that wasn’t strictly forbidden. for insurance, you convinced rosé and her boyfriend jaehyun to vouch for you. you and mark spent the week blowing each other and to this day nothing mark did got you off as hard as it did when he ate you out.

but after a while, you tugged mark’s hair, purring, “fuck me.”

mark pulled back, a little baffled. he liked eating you out. he noticed that it made you cum harder. “i haven’t prepared you yet. i don’t wanna hurt you.”

that’s the problem, you thought, miffed. “it’s okay. i can take it, baby.”

“are you sure?” mark’s brows were furrowed. it was cute. you also liked the way his brows furrowed when he was balls deep inside you.

“mm-hm. fuck me, please.”

mark reluctantly obeyed, because the last thing he wanted was to cause you any pain, but you kept insisting it would be fine. he was the type to always put your pleasure before his own, even if it meant ignoring how hard his dick throbbed and how desperately he needed to fuck you, because he loved you and you were his world. it was appreciated on your end, that was no doubt, but a bit of a nuisance.

with mark hovering above you now, you gripped his shoulders, biting your lip when he at last penetrated you. mark was slow and steady, at least when he first started fucking you, taking his sweet time to push every inch inside you. tears stung your eyes. there was a slight burn to his every thrust, and his steady pace prolonged the pain, but you were in love with it. plus your boyfriend leaned a little towards the girthy side. 

mark noticed your tears instantly and ground to a halt. “does it hurt?”

“no,” you lied, because you didn’t need him to worry his pretty little ass off. “feels good, markie. keep going.”

you gave a kiss of reassurance to his neck and that was all mark needed to pick back up where he left off, pushing in deeper with every thrust until he was completely swallowed by you. the whole time, mark was still kissing you, as if he was trying to take your mind off it. you wished he wasn’t afraid to be a little bit rougher with you. come to think of it, there wasn’t a single time where mark had ever hurt you on purpose - not even a smack to your ass or slap to your thigh. 

it made you feel guilty knowing your boyfriend was only being the caring gentleman that you had fallen for, but you couldn’t help what turned you on. you liked when he underestimated his strength, handling you a little bit harder than intended, or when he came and absent-mindedly gripped your hips like a vice, knuckles white and his hold tight enough to bruise. mark would apologize over and over, insisting he didn’t intend to, but you never complained. you liked to see the little bruises in the mirror or catch glimpses of them throughout the day.

at one point, mark picked up his pace, slapping his hips into yours with a rhythm. “harder,” you told him, wanting him to break you. “i can take it.”

mark did as told, though not without gently kissing your lips and telling you how beautiful you were. to mark, it was always a sight to see you like this. he was so proud to call you his. he was in love with how you sucked him in, how tight you were, but most importantly, he was in love with you and hoped his body would convey that during sex.

you moaned at how deep he was, closing your eyes and tuning him out. what would it take for him to break you - to fuck you like he hated you?

“almost there, baby,” mark groaned a little later, bringing his hands to your clit because he knew your body intimately and that was his saving grace.

“cum inside,” you whimpered, imagining him making threats of getting you pregnant. you could hear his voice in your head. that, combined with the drive of hips into yours, was the force pushing you towards the end.

mark kept pounding you out, becoming less and less steady. it was a telltale sign of him being close to release. your pleas for him to come inside you only made it worse, because the thought was at the front of his mind and he desperately needed to fill you to your utter capacity.

you needed him to cum inside you so badly. mark was groaning and grunting, unraveling before your eyes. at last he emptied his load into you, hips still rocking into yours until he reached the last of his high. you moaned at the feeling of him filling you to the brim, his fingers digging into your hips harshly.

mark, now returning to earth, glanced at you and frowned. “you didn’t cum.”

“i did.”

“don’t lie to me. that’s the worst thing you can do.”

you frowned. 

mark crept closer, running a finger over your cheek. he wanted absolute eye contact. “what am i doing wrong?”

“it’s not you, baby. i promise,” you sighed, running your fingers through his hair. “it’s me. i liked it. i’m just a little hard to please.”

mark retorted sharply, “and what does it mean if i can’t please you?”

“you do a very good job at pleasing me, mark. i told you, it feels good when you’re in me. don’t overthink it,” you told him sweetly. in all honesty, it wasn’t far from the truth. mark hit you in all the right places. there was just something missing.

mark leaned into your neck and murmured, “are you sure?”

“yes. so don’t worry your pretty little head.”

“okay,” mark huffed and moved his head to your chest.

two weeks later, you found yourself at jeno’s place. he was a mutual friend of you and mark and somebody you were both very close with. you had come over to drop off a plate of strawberry tiramisu per mark’s request but, as to be expected, got tangled in conversation.

jeno, curious as ever, asked, “speaking of mark, what’s going on with you and my boy?” 

you furrowed your brows. “what do you mean?” 

“he’s in one of those ‘my-girl-hates-me’ moods again. i thought you guys had gotten into an argument or something, but he won’t tell me, and since he’s so down in his spirits i just left it alone,” jeno said with a shrug.

you bit your lip. you had two options. you could either keep what happens with you and mark between you and mark, or you could open up a little. jeno was a trustworthy guy and friend, and thus you were more inclined to be honest with him. “we’ve hit a wall lately,” you said vaguely.

“as in?”

“as in the sex is very… how do i put this… we’re not having sex very often,” you explained, clearing your throat. 

that clearly got jeno’s attention. “don’t tell me mark’s game is declining.”

“no, it’s not mark. the sex is good. it’s just...,” you chewed over your words, unsure of how to put it in a way that could rationalize how you felt. without coming off completely insane. “he’s too gentle,” you whispered. 

to your surprise, jeno didn’t look at you like you had fifty heads. he actually seemed amused. jeno cocked his head, a smiling tugging at his lips, and asked, “and you like it rough?”

you nodded. to say the least. 

“have you communicated that with him?”

“i mean, no. but i have my reasons. how am i supposed to go up to him and tell him the reason i’m not cumming is because he’s not fucking me within an inch of my life?”

jeno chuckled. “my boy is a softie when in love,” he said.

exasperated, you leaned your head against jeno’s shoulder and groaned, “exactly. and i feel like an idiot for complaining about that of all things. he’s literally doing everything right. even if i did tell him, i seriously don’t even think he’s capable of hurting me on purpose.”

“i mean, how rough do you like it?” jeno’s question didn’t strike you as anything but an attempt to be helpful. “do you like getting spanked?”

“yes,” you said frankly.

“slapped?”

“yes.”

“hair pulling?”

“that’s the least extreme think i like.”

“flogging?”

“okay, now you’re crossing a line,” you said. that was a bit too extreme.

jeno threw up his hands. “hey, you’re the freak, not me.”

you frowned. you were thinking about mark again. he was the perfect boyfriend. maybe you should’ve let him go so he could find somebody that could appreciate him and all his efforts to show his girlfriend love, but you were too selfish for that. you threw jeno a glance. “do you think i’m crazy?”

jeno shook his head. “no, i think there’s a line between pain and pleasure. for some of us it’s thinner than it is for others. for some of us it’s larger,” he said, a little more sober than you expected.

which made you think. it wasn’t very often that you ranted about your life problems to jeno, though whenever you did, he always proved himself to be a good listener and good at giving you sound advice (no matter how inconsequential your problems might’ve seemed).

then, your attention flitted elsewhere, eyes at his bulging biceps. you were too in your head to really notice that he had his arm around you, and mark surely didn’t send you over here to snuggle with his best friend. you didn’t fail to notice that jeno was muscular because you weren’t blind and he made no attempt to hide it, the opposite rather, always proudly flaunting his physique. but this was the first time you were having thoughts that you probably shouldn’t.

you called, “jeno?”

“hm?”

“do you think mark would encourage me to seek out somebody else if he couldn’t fulfill my needs, or would he want to work through it?”

now that was the million dollar question. on the one hand, your question was not lost on jeno and he saw dead through you. you had been less than discreetly checking him out. but on the other, you were mark’s girl and it was the proper thing to do to give you an honest response. “both,” jeno told you, honest as could be. “because he wants you to be happy more than anything, but i know the second he let a pretty little thing like you go, he would lose his mind.”

your cheeks got warm. jeno just called me pretty, you thought. then, you instantly chided yourself. mark called you pretty too. and you liked it. the only reason you were getting excited because of jeno doing it was because there was a chance he could be the one to satisfy those cravings lurking inside you.

jeno cocked his head. “do you want me to help you?”

“help me how?”

“with that problem of yours,” he said, amused that you were playing dumb. as if you weren’t giving him those eyes only a moment ago. “girls always tell me i’m the right amount of rough.”

you gawked. “are you offering to have sex with me?”

jeno shrugged, pretending to be nonchalant. to be honest, he had wanted you for a while now, but again, you were mark’s girl. “somebody’s gotta do it. i wouldn’t mind.”

you hated that you were actually considering it. your thighs tingled with excitement, wanting it more than anything. but your boyfriend never once left your mind. “what about mark?”

“he’ll be glad it’s just me instead of somebody else,” jeno said confidently.

“you say that like mark himself told you that.”

jeno shrugged again. “it’s a yes or a no, princess.”

you mulled it over. this was a very, very stupid idea. and an egregious mistake in the making. but when you were thinking with your pussy instead of your head, all rational thoughts were completely off the table.

“yes,” you said, your better judgement clouded.

jeno smirked, satisfied with your answer. and lifted you into his burly arms, ignoring how you cried out in surprise while he carried you to his bedroom. you had no time to recover before he threw you against his mattress, wasting no time to climb on top of you and pull at your clothes with a vengeance. and you let him, because you were inclined to let jeno do whatever he wanted to you right now.

forget the consequences. you would worry about that part later.

you heard fabric tear and gawked in surprise when you realized jeno had torn your underwear off, sitting up to look at him, only to be roughly forced down your back again. he leaned directly over you, searching your face with fire smoldering in his sharp eyes. “i’m not mark. you’re not going to have your way with me. you’re going to lie down and take what i give you,” he hissed, voice low but clear as ever.

all you could do was nod. the words were sucked out of you. your throat had gone dry. and your muscles were painfully stiff. for now.

satisfied, jeno crept back down your body, positioning himself between your thighs. he ran his fingers over your folds and chuckled. you were already so wet from nothing at all. he didn’t intend to prep you very much, but pushed his fingers in and out of your pussy merely to feel how tight it wrapped around them. you impatiently whimpered out his name, clearly needy, and earned yourself a solid slap to the cunt.

you immediately squeezed your thighs back together, letting out another, more agonized noise, but jeno yanked them back apart just as quickly and your strength was no match for his, keeping your legs spread even as he smacked you a second time.

“jeno,” you whimpered again, tears bundling together in your lashes. you had chosen a godawful day to wear mascara.

jeno was completely unfazed, opening his bedside drawer to rummage around for a condom and held it up, cocking his brow at you. “condom or no condom?”

“are you clean?”

“yep,” said jeno. “i got tested a couple of weeks ago.”

“then, please fuck me raw,” you begged, throbbing at the thought. even when mark came inside you, you almost found it better than the sex itself.

jeno tossed the condom to the side with a chuckle and stepped out of his boxers, which made your jaw slacken. you had seen the imprint of his dick only moments prior and had tried your best to pretend like it didn’t bother you, but the sight of his hard cock standing tall against his stomach was enough to make you cry. jeno cocked his brow at you again, snickering to himself, and lined himself up at your entrance.

the wind was knocked out of you. good god he’s packing.

you sucked in a breath when jeno forced his way inside you, tears rolling down your cheeks at how much he stretched you out. you couldn’t even take all of it at once, but jeno would make you, ignoring the whimpers you cried as he stuffed you to the hilt. his brows scrunched together, fingers clawing into your hips to anchor himself with how deep he was inside you, and you swallowed every deliciously guttural sound that left his lips.

then, jeno had a brief lull of indecision, and pulled back out to roughly flip you over, just to penetrate you again just as quickly once you scrambled on your hands and knees. “fuck,” you whined, filling once more a surreal fusion of pain and pleasure.

jeno had told you there was a thin line between pain and pleasure. and as far as you were concerned, he had never been more right.

jeno, hands at your hips, asked huskily, “does it hurt?”

you bobbed your head, unable to stop the flow of tears. but i love it, you added in your head.

jeno was satisfied. “good,” he replied smugly.

never had you felt so full. you could feel him in the pit of your stomach and it was driving you mad. jeno had no intention of letting you adjust to his size either, already brutally smacking his hips against yours with a vengeance.

you let out a noise when jeno gripped your jaw, abruptly lifting up your tear-stained face. “look at yourself,” he growled, forcing you to look into the mirror across from his bed. no wonder he made you change positions. “shame you ruined all that pretty makeup with those tears.”

you looked a damn mess and it didn’t help that you had jeno rutting into you from behind, making you lose any and all sense of order you still had. jeno loved how helpless you looked. all you could do was lie there and take it, and you could barely even do that. when you tried to look away, he forced your face back where he wanted it, chin between his fingers, and said darkly, “i don’t like to repeat myself. look at yourself. i want you to watch yourself get fucked by your boyfriend’s friend because you can’t get off to being fucked normally.”

that made your walls clamp around him, and consequently a deep howl escaped jeno. it was criminal how sexy he sounded, and the more you pleasured him, the rougher his hands got on your body. you could already feel the bruises at your hips that would probably take weeks to completely fade.

a certain sharp thrust made you whimper and hang your head, singing out his name. jeno slapped your cheek and the sting went straight to your cunt, making you clench around him. you brought your head back to the mirror, remembering you were supposed to be watching yourself, though you were tempted to glance off just so that he would hit you again.

jeno shook his head when he felt you clench around him, chuckling to himself. he smacked his palm against your face again for amusement, just to see you soak in the pain. “you’re so pathetic, you know that?” he asked, followed by a laugh. “need to get roughed up to get off?”

you whined, “please…”

“please what?” jeno asked, in spite of knowing damn well what you wanted. but he wanted to hear you say it. he wanted you to hear how pathetic you sounded.

you bit your lip. was he really going to make you say it? “please hit me,” you whispered.

jeno hummed, furrowing his brows in mock confusion. “kiss you?”

you shook your head and cried, “jeno, please hit me again.”

satisfied, jeno gripped your jaw in his fingers to keep it in place as he forced you to look in the mirror, then slapped your cheeks a couple of times. “is that hard enough for you, baby?” 

“harder,” you whimpered. 

jeno laughed. 

jeno kept hitting you and throwing you around, whispering the cruelest of words in your ear and telling you how disgusting you were for liking getting roughed up. it should have humiliated you, but it also brought you closer to climax in record time.

jeno wasn’t far behind you, because you kept tightening around him every every degrading word and violent touch, and it drove him mad with lust. not a single part of him was worried about mark right now, and from the looks of it, you had forgotten about your boyfriend too, completely absorbed in how jeno was hitting you in all the right places. literally.

face to face with climax, jeno gripped your hair, pulling it back. you whined, but jeno merely nibbled at your ear before saying, “i’m gonna cum in this tight little pussy and you’re gonna take every drop.”

“yes, please,” you replied, not opposed at all. “fill me up, jeno. please.”

“fuck,” jeno groaned, slapping his hips into yours even harsher. you were so fucking perfect that he was tempted to steal you from mark and make you his bitch. and he might have already done that without even trying.

with a couple more hits, you were unraveling around jeno and it triggered his own orgasm. he came inside you with a grunt and leaned over you to clamp his teeth into your shoulder, trying to smother his own sounds. you, on the other hand, couldn’t control the noises that left you, moaning and shaking harder than ever as your climax got the best of you.

jeno pulled out, sated, and watched you crumble on his sheets, chest heaving. “good?” he asked. 

you nodded, still trying to catch your breath. and clear your mind. “yeah,” you croaked, blinking. “thank you.”

jeno snickered. “any time. i can tell you needed it.”

damn right, you thought.

you cleaned yourself up and as if nothing had happened, jeno thanked you for the tiramisu before you headed home to mark. before you got in the car, you grabbed your phone to let him know you were on the way back, and were thrown for a loop when you saw what time it was, plus the missed texts you had from your boyfriend. you had completely loss track of time.

when you stepped inside the house, mark was in the living room watching the amazing spider-man 2, and immediately turned around when he heard the door unlocking. “babe,” he said, leaping up to hug you. “i missed you.”

“i wasn’t gone that long,” you muttered, wrapping your arms around your boy. he felt safe. “but i missed you too.”

mark never wanted to let you go, and he didn’t, but there was a little frown on his face when he murmured into your neck, “you smell like jeno.”

you swallowed. “well, i was at jeno’s house. where jeno lives.”

“you were there for a while.”

“yeah, well,” you started, guilt suddenly blindsiding you. “you know how jeno is. can never say hi and bye and be done. he always has to start a conversation.”

“sounds like him,” mark said, nodding. “did he at least like the tiramisu?” 

“of course he did. he’s jeno.”

mark chuckled. “wanna watch gwen stacy die for the billionth time with me?”

you frowned. “only if we watch andrew save tom’s mj right after,” you replied. 

“deal.”

the two of you ran to the couch, and you pushed your guilt to the back of your heart as you snuggled in your boyfriend’s arms, trying desperately to forget what you just did to him.

“babe, i’m gonna go make us some popcorn,” mark said, slowly backing away from you. 

you sent him off with a nod, smiling and flitting your gaze back to the television screen. 

in the kitchen, mark opened the pantry and slid his phone from his pockets to open his text messages. how’d it go?

how do you think? 

mark rolled his eyes. she’s glowing. what did you do? 

it’s not that hard, mark. all you gotta do is slap her around a little. 

mark poked out his head, watching you with your eyes fixated to the screen. i’ll keep that in mind, he replied back. 

there was no reply and mark’s phone didn’t buzz until the microwave beeped. still on for friday?

you bet. 

[technologyculturedneo]

icantfeelanything. Lee Donghyuck

“I don’t want to leave him! He’s mine and I am his!”

PAIRING(s). Donghyuck X Reader X Chenle

SUMMARY. Your whole world comes to an end when your knocked over by a car and are proclaimed dead. Yet you wake up in a different space, your boyfriend, Donghyuck’s mind. You are met with a furious ‘Memory Keeper’ Mr Zhong who tries to force you out. You’re reluctant to leave simply because he wants Donghyuck to move on from losing you. However, that is something you refuse to do as long as you're in his mind.

-Dreamscape Masterlist-

20:36 p.m.

It happens quickly. So quick that only a second goes by. So swiftly that you watch your soul fighting to remain intact to your body.

One minute you're running across the street with the biggest grin on your face, without any fear in the quiet road. The next moment your body is collided by such brute force that instantly you feel the cracks and punctures piercing out through your bone and body. Surging- high up in the air bitterly painful but beautifully dead- in pain you hear a splat sound as you fall and hit the pavement floors! It takes a millisecond to lose sight, but you see red. Your vision goes blurry, your eyelids shut involuntarily, your rapture your ears- eardrums beating promptly and briskly only causing you to hear muffling sounds. A spike sound has your heartbeat pounding so loud that your ears fight not to burst. Through it all, through this moment… that moment on the cold night, the paved road, you make out your boyfriend's state of worry. But even though you hear him... your body can't move.

Hyuck...

Parched lips, blood over your eyes, shivering with pain bruising all over your body. Your flickering eyes and palpable sense of lack in body motions has you worried – especially when you see your own steadfast boyfriend rushing to your side in panic and horror.

"You're going....to...ok-"

Your mind goes blank. Quiet. That quiet is scary as you fight to open your eyes. Nothing but pain spikes your attention again.

When you open your eyes again, you're almost blinded by all the light. Hyuck…

You’re confused to see his tears, to hear his voice that's fading in and out of your ears. It’s painful. You just want to close your eyes, but the sight of the heavy tears rolling down his eyes has you… fighting.  He’s crying hysterically moving his lips in haste, talking words you can’t hear. The pain is too much. Your heart strains, but you can’t find the strength to open your heavy eyes and look at him anymore. Your heart beating hysterically.

No.

Your mind gets blurry each and every time you try to open your eyes. But all you can see aside from waves of dizziness and blood, is your boyfriend. Broken and just so… broken. Hyuck… You try to move your hand, but it’s heavy. You try to move your lips, but their sore. You try to lift your head but you can’t feel nothing but the pain, you TRY to do something! You try so hard to even catch a beat of your heart, but your body doesn’t respond, your mind feels detached, your whole soul feels light as it leaves your body! No!- you only see his tears when you close your eyes after fighting for so long. A single stream leaves your own eye.

Donghyuck runs rapidly by the nurses’ side pushing forward the trolley bed with your unconscious body. He holds onto your bloodied hand unable to control his breathing. The tears are just as fast as his words, and his legs levitate with the speed he’s at. “You’re okay, you’re okay. You’re going to be okay, just hold on, hold on baby. Please hold on. Don’t leave, don’t leave. Please stay, please stay, baby please. I’m here, I’m here, I’m right here, please be okay, please please please, please- PLEASE!”

“I’m sorry sir, but you can’t go past this point,” A nurse cuts him from your hand, holding him back with another nurse trying to restrain his movements while the other nurses continue to hurry in pushing the trolley forward.

“Please you- I need to be there! I need to be by her side-” Donghyuck’s legs that try to get past the nurse becomes heavy and he thumps down on the ground watching your bed disappear after turning a corner. He barely shouts out clinging to his shirt that's bloodied and hands stained with your blood. He can only see red. He's finding it hard to breathe, his chest feels tight, his breathing is irregular and the damn tears won’t stop flowing out his eyes. 

The nurses’ voices fade away when he recalls all that happened just hours ago. He heard your yelp seconds before the accident. One second, you were there grinning and running to him, and out of nowhere your body was suddenly ‘kicked’ high in the cold dark air- flying like a ball with such speed he only saw in cartoons. His soul felt like it had been struck by lightning, because the moment he ran- he felt as though he would burn and die by how fast he got to you. His only priority was you – there was nothing else in his head but your wellbeing. The flying image of your body, the excruciating sound he heard when the car almost drove over your lifeless body, and how your hands struggled to hold onto him, made him hysterical.

"Please Y/n, you can't die. Stay."

You had to survive, you had to survive for him. You had to survive, you couldn’t just go, you couldn’t just go like that. There was so much that was left unsaid, so many feelings he wanted to express to you. So many things he wanted to share with you. You had to survive because of all the things you and him had planned out. He only had you in his life. He only had you.

With haste again, Donghyuck runs to the seriously firm and sturdy Doctor that approaches him. The doctor notices the dried blood stains over Donghyuck's shirt (possibly your blood) and he can tell that he might be the boyfriend that the nurse told him about. The doctor can see the trauma going through Donghyuck's eyes covered in a failing smile.

“Yes Doctor? How is she? She’s fine right? She’s okay right? S-she’s fine, I know she is. She’s a survivor. She’s a fighter, she’s my girl, she can’t die. She’s okay right. Oh my god, I knew it. Good because her brother, her brother is here-”

Donghyuck rambles on with an anxious positive spirit. He was positive that you survived, because he knew you, you weren’t the type to go down without fighting, fighting for life…fighting for him. The doctor watches on with a stale face but it slowly falls away and becomes filled with dismay and melancholy. He watches how Donghyuck has a wounded smile, with tears that prickle underneath his eyes, as he motions for Mark to come over. The doctor and Mark both see right through Donghyuck’s smile for the pain that’s truly building up in him.

“Mark, Mark, please come. Please tell the Doctor about your sister, she’s incredible and is alive, right?” Donghyuck prompts, avoiding the Doctor’s eyes that already said the words he didn't want to hear.

Donghyuck grins brightly at the doctor, the tears already falling down his eyes.

“Doctor, why aren’t you saying anything? Please say something. Tell us good news,”

Donghyuck’s smile twitches as he stares at the Doctor. His tongue begins to heavily tremble, when the male Doctor looks down.

As if possessed Donghyuck grabs onto the Doctor’s shoulders. “SAY SOMETHING! GODDAMNIT SPEAK! FUCK! SAY SHE’S ALIVE! PLEASE- please, please, please-“ Donghyuck’s words fade away as he clings onto the Doctor’s coat shutting his eyes tightly knowing very well that he won’t be hearing those words tonight… he won’t be hearing those words ever. “This can’t be… This can’t happen… Y/n… doctor please tell me you saved her. Please tell me you tried to save her… doctor…” Donghyuck drops to the ground, tears rushing out like a flood gate. His hands hit the floor as he buries his head on his hands as he cries out your name.

Mark not having enough energy is already seated on the bench, with a headache forming in his head from holding in his tears. His eyes are red and sting, tears ready to spill and overflow, his jaw feels strangled as the veins pump in heaps of pain. He lays his head in his hands fighting back with waves of crushing emotions swerving all over him. Donghyuck was already in a ball on the floor wailing out for his dear life- Mark is seconds away from letting his guard down but he tightly guards his trembling lips because he has to be the stronger person. But how could he be strong when hearing this news… He scoffs they didn’t even hear the news, hearing the words would just be too painful. You’re gone. Mark holds himself back as he realizes that he has no little sister anymore. You’re gone. You’re… gone.

“My deepest condolence for your loss.” Lifting his head up when feeling a brisk hand on his shoulder, his teary eyes peek up to the Doctor who’s already looking down at him, a coat of dejection and despair looming over him. “Your sister was as the young fellow said, she was exactly strong and did put up a fight. You’re allowed in her room for some days. If possible we'd appreciate it if you signed her release papers. There was nothing I could do to save her, for that, I apologize.”

-

“Oh god. She’s here!”

“Is she really here? Should we inform headquarters?”

“She’s truly stunning, I can’t believe she’s here,”

“But what is she doing here?”

“She’s not supposed to be here.”

Sound morphs all around you allowing you to hear voices around you. Your eyes are frozen literally, as if your body is trying to understand why it’s not feeling pain anymore. Nothing hurts. You try to make out the voices, yet you know none of them. Your conscious attention is directed to something else when you can feel… some sort of liquid being poured over your toes. Your breath hitches in your throat shutting out all the voices as you try to focus on whatever is being poured over your body. With trembling lips, you feel your knees and ankles buckle when the liquid substance pours over. It’s cold and it clings to your legs, your torso, your breast, your arms- everything gets soaked into the liquid goo and eventually your neck and head and even hair get smeared with the clinging liquid squeezing your body shut. You feel suffocated and chills all over your body. After a daunting time you struggle to breathe!- your body finally trembles and you can feel every inch of your figure and every movement of your fingers. Your eyes fly open as you sharply huff in a large intake of air.

Those around your figure stand by with some wet towels, dry towels and a robe. They watch your clear slime covered figure breaking out of the yoke you were in. You’re wet and nude as you shoot up on the white operating table panting for your dear life. They stand in astonishment watching you in awe, at how breathtaking you look.

You cough out trying to get rid of the odd liquid substance that entered your mouth. Your eyes are struck by the blinding yellow of the room you’re in- and the weird goo. You see three ladies in the room and you can’t stop trying to breathe as your breath feels short and unstable. “Why can’t I breathe?”

You're short of breath yet again when you look down to see the gooey slime all over your body. Shrieking out of the white mattress the ladies follow you and so does the gooey white slime. The slime falls off of you and your stunned that you’re bare and exposed. A squeak leaves your lips when the ladies scramble to you quickly wiping you and cleaning you up. You quiver in fear but stay still out of shock as they continue to clean you up and assure you that everything is alright.

However that doesn’t seem to be the case when your head snaps to the side watching as the door fiercely opens up and with heavy propelled steps, a figure stands in all black. Your frantic eyes are sharply on the male figure that enters the room with sharp eyes of vexation. Your arms quick in reflex cover up your exposed breast, but the ladies around you are faster in getting a grip of your hands trying to clean you with the wet towels and dry towels. “Hey-” your side tracked when seeing the ladies faces… Donghyuck? They look like your boyfriend but in different colored wigs.

This was supposed to be simple, with you waking up, coming out of your yoke, sitting up and calmly being cleaned up. Normal procedures for the ladies in white, yet they're stunned and muzzled by your befuddlement and the entrance of a presence that’s not supposed to be here. 

“Mr Zhong,” The main nurse steps forward bowing to him. “You’re here.” Is all she can manage to say. Why was he here? What was he doing here? What did he want? He’s not supposed to be here during clean up- not even that, seeing him out of the main core center is unusual.

“What the hell are you doing here?” His question and devious tone is not aimed at the nurse or other cleaners. No, it’s aimed at you. You simply stare at him quivering back in fear with every step he takes. You’re just as frightened and confused like the other nurses, but you’re more on the alarmed side.

Where were you? And what is going on- what is going on?

Mr Zhong stands in front of you, his being towering your bare trembling body. Your eyes are on his harsh dark eyes as you watch his own irked eyes move down your body. Your hands are too afraid to cover up so you let him take in your nude body that’s been cleaned up.

“Answer me.” He whispers making chills run down your spine- his voice rises again so loud that you jump. “What are you doing here!?” 

You cower your eyes looking down trying to hold yourself from exploding into a scared cry. “I don’t know- I don’t know where I am. I don’t know anything. I just woke up! I think I hit my head or something and-”

“Mr Zhong she just woke up from her yolk. She’s disoriented and her memory is still foggy. If you give us a few minutes we’ll get her in-”

“Where’s Hyuck?” Your soft voice speaks up as his eyes suddenly come up into your eyes. You were at a hospital the last you remember with Donghyuck… you were in an accident. “Where is he?”

“Oh god.” Mr Zhong rolls his eyes shut in irritation as he runs his hand through his hair. “Get her cleaned up right now will you? Why is it taking so long?”

The nurses are quick to clean you up, applying some lotion for your body and even massaging your shoulders and head, scraping your skull with deep fingers calming you down. You feel like you’re being given a free spa treatment, when they wrap your body in a robe. They make you perform some balance test, asking you move your head left and right, if you can stand on your right leg and left leg, they dress you up in a white bra, a white vest and finally a white shirt, paired with white underwear and a white skirt. You feel comfortable amongst the ladies who strangely look like Donghyuck. Nonetheless you ignore the male figure in a black suit eyeing everything that they’re doing.

Are you dreaming? Did you hit your head?

His eyes are shamelessly glaring you down as the ladies pamper you up with sweet calming words that meant absolutely nothing to him. You were here and if you were here, it only meant trouble.

“Alright. You’re all cleaned up.” The three nurses stand in front of you bowing, before returning to their natural smiles. You don’t understand why you had to be cleaned up and why these ladies even looked like Donghyuck. In fact, where is-

“Where’s Donghyuck?” You ask.

The smiles slowly slip from their lips looking to each other.

“She’s a spirit.” Your eyes turn to Mr Zhong seated on the chair watching you with such distaste that you instantly look away. “A lover.” Why is he looking at you with such anger? And what is a lover?

“A lover?” The mentions of a lover floats around the air on different lips of the nurses as you look around the yellow space.

“I need to get back to Hyuck,”

“No.” Mr Zhong stands up sternly. “What you will do is follow me, and hopefully you can get out of here before you overdo your stay.”

-

“You’re dead.”

“No.”

“You’re dead.”

You gulp and shake your head. “I’m awake. I’m alive.”

“You’re dead.” The guy known as Mr Zhong repeats his words. You shake your head with disbelief not allowing your ears to believe a thing he’s saying.

“I’m not dead.” You say again. It seems like a cycle with you in denial and Mr Zhong repeatedly repeating himself not wanting to break the cycle. It seems like he really wants you to get it in your head that you’re- “I’m not dead!”

“You’re dead.” He deadpans again.

“No I’m not.”

Not bothering to change his wording, he crosses his arms only staring at you bored and angered out of his mind. “You’re dead.”

“Stop saying that!” You yell standing up balling your fists. There are tears clinging to your eyes. “I can’t be dead! I can’t! Can’t you see I’m breathing? Are you blind to that?”

“You don’t even have a heartbeat or pulse.” Mr Zhong tilts his head. “You’re dead.”

“Stop!” You yell at him controlling your hands to stop you from trying to slap or push him. Blinking your tears away. “Stop saying that please. I only asked you where Donghyuck is.”

“And I’ve been telling you that you’re inside of him.” He shuts his eyes rubbing his temple. “And that’s because you’re-”

“I will strangle you if you dare repeat that sentence.”

He calls your name once while turning around. How did he know your name? “You’re wasting precious time. You know what, follow me, if you want proof and clarification.”

Being told you’re dead and that you’re inside your lover (inside of Donghyuck’s body) causes an unstable balance inside of you. You look at your hands and see how clear they are from any wound, but you can also remember feeling numb from all the idle pain all over your body. You can’t remember what happened- but you know that you were hurt badly. Otherwise why else was Donghyuck crying. You remember following him to the hospital... or he was following you- you’re not sure, but you do know that he was in an insane amount of pain...wait, you were in an insane amount of pain. You felt your head about to explode and your entire body in such frail torture, throbbing and aching. 

If you felt that pain, then why are you okay right now? It’s the only thing you can think about. You turn around in the white hall, finally finding Mr Zhong by an elevator. He sticks out like a sore thumb because everything in the room is white except his dark suit. Your legs are heavy but you follow him and stand beside him in the elevator letting out a chilling breath. 

“Where are you taking me?”

You pose simply, only to have him ignore you and press up a button. The elevator starts moving up and you notice that the doors are clear and see through. As the elevator goes up, the white hall you were in goes down and the new scenery of black clouds and a neon view of an ominous city lights up in the night, but the elevator goes higher despite floating in… midair. You stand closer to the door taking in the view of each layer of the city that is darkened and only lit by the flashing colors of pink blue and yellow. The confusion in you only grows. The views disappear and a grey room is present when the elevator stops. The doors slide open and Mr Zhong takes steps out with you carefully following him.

After leaving that weird place, he continued being cold with a bothered face. You can already guess that he doesn’t like you at all, not one bit. He barely gave any other emotion then abhor and clear hatred. Maybe hate is too strong but that’s what you can see in his eyes. He hates you and you don’t know why, you don’t even know him. But he somehow seems to be in charge as he walks around like he knows everything.

In the narrow grey corridor, you try to keep up with him as he turns into various open turns. Peeking from behind him you spot a door that’s in front with the number 4R. 

A flashing white light hits your eyes and you shake your head hearing loud voices. 

“Pulse going down!”

“Doctor we’re losing blood, we’re losing her!”

“We need to stabilize her stat!”

You stand still shutting your eyes to block out the words but they continue on yet instead of getting louder, they slowly fade.

“Get the charge.”

“Volt?”

“180.”

“Standby. Clear.”

You gasp aloud and pant out.

“Pulse fading.”

“Again. Standby. Clear.”

A sharp sting grips your chest and you grab it gasping out.

“Pulse fading.”

“We’re losing her.”

It’s the last thing you hear before sharply opening your eyes blinking excessively when Mr Zhong stands in front of you. “That’s called your Last Memory.”

“Last Memory?” You ask trying to catch your breath and stand straight. 

“Yes. The last thing your inactive brain remembers before it shuts down. I guess this hall triggered it.”

“But I thought I’m in Donghyuck’s mind?” You whisper out grumpily standing straight. “What the hell is going on?”

“Right now we’re not in Donghyuck’s mind. I just took your spirit out of it. Plus another day has passed. It’s almost 7pm. You’re tethered to him.”

“What?” Confusion washes over you yet again, by the words that leave his lips. You have no idea of the things he’s talking about. “What do you mean tethered to him?”

He turns on his heel continuing to walk towards the door named 4R. “Things will make sense when you come to terms with the fact that you’re dead.”

He opens the door and there’s a dim light that he disappears into. Quickly you follow him rubbing your eyes upon entering the bright room. 

You can hear soft sobs and instantly snap your head to the source. There’s a hospital bed and a chair. On the chair... And on the bed...

You feel your heart about to explode from beating so fast. Your knees lose balance and you fall down. “W-what is this?” You ask unable to comprehend the sight before you. 

Mr Zhong stands by the corner of the room with his hands in his pocket as he looks at the sight of your dead body on the bed and Donghyuck’s disheveled appearance seated on the chair. He’s crying as his eyes are fixed on your lifeless face.

“What memory is this?” You ask trembling as you try to get on your feet with your weak body trying to handle and support your movement. But it can’t, your emotions wearing you down.

“This isn’t a memory.” Mr Zhong speaks taking in a breath stepping closer. “You died 3 days ago. Today, they’re discharging your body and preparing for burial-”

“B-burial?” Your heart hammers in your chest as you fall again to the ground. “Burial for what? Who’s getting buried?”

“Your burial is in 2 days time,” Mr Zhong continues.

“No.” A string of disbelief leaves your lips just as your tears blur your vision. You stumble up and run to Donghyuck but get the surprise of your life when your whole body passes through him and you fall rigidly to the ground. “D-Donghyuck?” You cry out immediately sitting up and trying to touch him. “Baby please I’m here! I’m here! That’s not me! That’s not me! I’m here! Donghyuck! Hyuck! Baby!” Your voice quivering and trembling as you try so desperately to cling onto his body, but each time your hand goes through, until you’re struggling to breathe with your chest at a loss of air. “No!” You wail out in deep agony. “I survived- I’m here. I can feel and that’s not me. That’s not me- please no.” 

Your tears are nonstop as you bury your head on Donghyuck’s thigh… well, trying too.

Mr Zhong’s eyes widen when he senses that Donghyuck can suddenly feel your presence. Donghyuck blows out a breath of air and his own tears stream down faster as he looks at your dead body on the bed. He stands up and his whole body circles your dead body again as he cries. He’s not supposed to be holding you, but the nurses are not around, and he could care less about the trouble he would be in. Mr Zhong lets out a breath of relief when sensing it was only your sorrowed and burden emotions that pushed Donghyuck into another wave of tears.

Mr Zhong needed to get you out, but your weakened state next to the feet of your boyfriend has him in despair. Even though he despises you, he knows how much you mean to Donghyuck, and so he leaves the room to let you have a moment. After all you just found out that you’re dead.

You're crying alongside Donghyuck, while Mr Zhong stands outside the door listening to the both of you pour out your hearts. Of course it’s hard to believe you’re inside of Donghyuck’s mind when you can see him with your physical eyes. But then again, Mr Zhong has been here far longer than you have. In his mind, he tries to think of ways to get you out of Donghyuck’s head before it’s too late. He shakes his head. “It’s already late.” He mutters to himself. “But I need to get her out of here. Before anyone sees her.”

This is all happening because Donghyuck doesn't want to let you go. Mr Zhong sighs. He needs to get you out of Donghyuck's head, he needs to do it as soon as possible before you got sucked in. The less you know the better. It’s even better that no one saw you aside from those nurses. He needs to get you out before another member inside of Donghyuck sees you.

Mr Zhong's senses alert and sharpen when he can feel Donghyuck and you together. Donghyuck can feel you. That’s not good. Donghyuck can’t interact with your spirit. Under no circumstance is he allowed to do that. Mr Zhong bursts into the hospital room his eyes enlarging when you're hugging Donghyuck from behind. You’re focusing your entire being just to hug Donghyuck and it seems to be working because Donghyuck can feel your presence… or rather can feel an embrace wrapping their arms around him. Donghyuck is anything but confused as he cries out. “I can’t live without you. I can’t…” Donghyuck shakes his head when seeing your dried out and dull lifeless lips.

Meanwhile Mr Zhong's heart beats rapidly when he senses what Donghyuck is about to do. He gulps and his legs are quick to act in grabbing your shirt from behind and yanking you. "We have to go now." 

"Wh-what? Why?" You're ripped from Donghyuck as Mr Zhong pulls you back. You try to fight him off you with your strength but Mr Zhong balls his fist and your body begins to move against your will. "No- please- just give me more time with him! Please-"

Your words fall on deaf ears as Mr Zhong's running and forcing your body to move as well in the direction you came from. In a far distance as you cross your ‘Last memory’ you hear the words of the Doctor charging your body again and you jolt up when feeling the electrical current shoot throughout your body, however the process is short lived when you're pulled away extremely fast and into the elevator next to Mr Zhong. “Come one go faster. Go faster.” Mr Zhong stresses out. You wipe your tears suddenly being drawn to his alertness. What’s going on now?

There's a loud ringing in your head when the elevator door opens up to a... large white room that looks like a lab with plenty of laptops and screens. –Beep- Beep- Beep- the alarm sounds off very loudly. 

"What's going on?" You shut your eyes when the ringing ‘crings’ annoyingly. You can't hear Mr Zhong but with blurry sight you see him run out of the elevator to the white room… that's slowly turning dark. You try to follow however your mind is distorted and you collapse on the ground due to all the ringing.

Mr Zhong- tagged along with a great hand of different operators run around the ‘monitor room’ also known as the Core control room. With screens all over monitoring all of Donghyuck’s scenes, there’s one large screen that captures what he’s seeing exactly. That’s the one that Mr Zhong controls when he senses that Donghyuck isn’t being himself. The people in the room all in charge of different senses are running up and down in haste- trying to get Donghyuck to calm down- they press on all the buttons that are used to prevent a forced ‘shut down’. The lights in the center are fading black.

Donghyuck is having a breakdown and is about to shut down his mind. That can't happen. Because if it happens, then the Core can’t control, leaving Donghyuck in the hands of his impulsive ‘Body’. Mr Zhong pulls on a leather hanger and blinks several times when eyeing the monitor screen to see through Donghyuck's eyes. 

Donghyuck is still in the hospital room pacing back and forth, wanting to rampage. “I… I should be the one to die. I should be the one to die. I should be… the one… to…” Huffing and puffing, Donghyuck picks up his car keys and goes out the door. He can hear his brain telling him not to do it but there's just so much emotion building in him that he can't fathom or want to feel. Getting in his car he slams the door shut and bangs repeatedly on the steering wheel yelling out in sheer anger and possibly crying out.

Mr Zhong speaks into Donghyuck’s thoughts as his ‘subconscious voice’. “Don’t do it Donghyuck. You don’t have to do something crazy to prove.” 

Drive. However, with the fading lights in the control room, Donghyuck gives into the will of the Body to drive instead of listen to his own thoughts.

"No!" Mr Zhong hastily pulls on the leather to try and have some more light- to try and have control in the darkening room. The other coordinators are scampering in heaps of fear by Donghyuck's edged decisions. "Come on Donghyuck! Please don’t do it! Listen to be before you do something crazy! Stop the car!" 

All efforts in the control room are vain when Donghyuck starts the engine and with raging force the tires screech loudly and his car thrusts forward in deadly speed. Cars are hooting on every lane by his careless driving. Donghyuck finds himself not caring and he drives on the highest speed challenging the accelerator in his car. All the windows are up, the car is filled with sounds of him deeply breathing and running his hand over his hair violently and his foot blistering from how cogently he's stepping on the speed paddle. 

The Core’s control room is no longer fading black, instead the whole room is a darkened red with flashing lights- the alarm sounds are all off. All the controls are black and the only thing everyone can do is watch the screen of Donghyuck's eyes and he swerves in dangerous speeds racing in between cars and him yelling out. He’s on a high way leading to his own death.

Mr Zhong worriedly looks at the screen watching his best friend lose his mind and having a mild panic attack. Mr Zhong holds onto the ledge tightly with tears in his eyes. “Donghyuck stop this!” All the pain Donghyuck is feeling - he can feel it too. Especially in this moment. Donghyuck is feeling guilty. Worthless. Pathetic for staying alive when his girlfriend has died. Mr Zhong feels useless that he can't do anything but watch as his friend is driving to his own death. In moments like this, when Donghyuck’s Core lost control to the Body- they could do nothing but watch it all happen. All the operators as if in defeat and sync all kneel on the ground together with their eyes no longer trained on the screen but on the floor as they prepare for death. Because by the looks of Donghyuck’s reckless driving, they were bound to death. This is what usually happens when the mind and body are no longer connected. Donghyuck feels on edge that he can't feel anything and so the body moves on its own in rebellion. Mr Zhong doesn't close his eyes, he simply sinks on the ground waiting for the impact of the crush whenever it'll happen.

Is this seriously how Donghyuck will lose his life? By ending it, while thinking of being with you.

Donghyuck panting out in sheer self-resentment drives off the highway and crushes past the border line lanes and he's car is surging down the cliff in rapid speed.

It's getting hot and Mr Zhong can feel it. The roads are bumpy and Donghyuck stupidly removes his seatbelt having his red tearful bleeding eyes already set on a tree. He's ready to crash into. 

With determination Donghyuck prepares himself for impact his eyes balling out blurring his vision.

"Hyuck… Hyuck…"

Mr Zhong's ears are sharp when hearing it. Hearing the soft breathless echo. From Donghyuck's eye vision, Mr Zhong sees a ghostly appearance of a hand holding onto the staring wheel… holding onto his hand. Mr Zhong's eyes snap all around until he spots you on the ground (that you supposedly passed out on).

Your lips are dry, your body is flat on the floor, however your eyes are filled with tears when wearily looking at the screen. Mr Zhong makes out your hand that's slowly balling in a fist and by instinct he can feel that Donghyuck can feel it as well. You intertwine your fingers with his.

Donghyuck feeling the tingling sensation presses his foot sharply on the break! pedal causing the car to come to a dangerous sharp stop with the tires raging on and burning up with smoke emitting all around the car. Donghyuck nearly flies off his seat but he grips the wheel tightly especially when still seeing your hand on his.

The car stops a few gaps away from the rough branched tree, but Donghyuck's isn't even focused on that as his breathing rises with his eyes firmly on the hand wrapped tightly in his. He turns to the side and the ghostly appearance of your bloody image is what he sees before it fades away.

“Y/n…” He breaks out into a breathless cry, laying his head on the staring wheel.

In the center, heads rise when noticing the red lights disappear before the white light flickers back on giving control back to the mind. The sadness team comes together to allow Donghyuck to cry- quickly getting back on track to allow Donghyuck to not lose control again. Mummers go around, but Mr Zhong has his eyes fixed on you. The others can't hear it, but he can. He can hear it because Donghyuck can hear your soft whispers in his ear. 

"Please, don't do it. Live...for me...please. Hyuck…"

While the coordinators in the room weakly take control of the system, Mr Zhong looks to the screen of Donghyuck's eyes. Donghyuck glares at the empty passenger’s chair and whimpers out your name. Mr Zhong moves to your corner before anyone can see you and he places you in his room leaving the door open. “Why is it so dark in here?”

He ignores you and carries on doing what he was doing. “Rest up.”

Donghyuck falls asleep on the couch again, too lazy to go to his room and too drained to move. After having a full on blow cry of his life, he got out his car when it refused to start again. The car was busted. He walked up the rocky cliff making it to the highway again. His mind not even on the fact that he just lost his car. He felt numb of emotions and his throat was sore. Walking wasn't such a bad idea as he got to slowly recall your weak figure...bloody figure. He got teary eyed again and allowed himself to cry out on the road as he walked meekly on the side. How could he go on without you being there? He couldn't. And that's why, when feeling your presence tonight he wanted to continue feeling it forever more. By the time he got to his house, he crashed on the couch and instantly got induced by sleep.

Mr Zhong monitors everything until he feels sleep take over and Donghyuck is passed out on the couch. Mr Zhong looks at the blank screen being worn out. Now the Dreamers in Dream Land are taking over in giving him something to dream about. Tonight was challenging. If it weren't for you, Donghyuck would've died. As if being summoned Mr Zhong turns his head around when seeing your walking figure. You're dressed in all white again and you sit on the chair next to him. 

"I told you to rest." Mr Zhong's voice isn't sharp like before, but it's stern and on the quiet side. 

You nod your head slowly, fumbling with the ends of your sleeves out of pure anxiety. "I did. But I couldn't bring myself to sleep. Mr Zhong... I wanna understand what's going on. I'm lost out of my mind and you're the only one who I believe I can talk to."

Mr Zhong turns his head to you and sighs. "What you don’t know won’t hurt you. Besides, you have to leave his body. Let's take a walk."

"You said something about me being a lover. That I’m tethered to Hyuck. Is this heaven? Am I supposed to be here?"

“You’re not supposed to be here, which is why should leave.”

Elevators are Mr Zhong's way of movements you take note. The moment he thinks of it, by a second there's already an elevator door that presents itself. Just like him, it's a darkened grey almost black color. You stand beside him and the elevator goes down and away from the white center room. “Why are you the only one that is coated in darkness?” You question, and as you expected, he doesn’t answer you. By the time the elevator opens up, you see the outside. You follow right behind Mr Zhong on the darkened streets of the neo colored place.

"I’d believe that I’m inside of him if his insides looked all brainy and stuff. So, where are we really?” You pose confused while looking at a place that looked much more like a city then a mind or brain or all bloody.

"The less you know the better. But for a little insight, everybody is different as they should be. If you want brain and blood, just ask and I’ll take you to the real interior of Donghyuck. Right now, we’re in the interior central. The Dreamscape City. You know how some people are, structured, punctual, disciplined and focused? Well Donghyuck's being is like that. Everything that Donghyuck is, his personality: the things he likes, dislikes, traits, smarts, kinks, special places, basically his whole conscious is here in an organized collected city. I call it Cyber Dream, just because of it’s tech style. But everyone here knows it as the pit of Donghyuck or Dreamscape. If you like, you can call yourself a figment of Donghyuck’s imagination." Mr Zhong answers as he navigates himself through a busy street. You’re not far behind from him trying to hear everything he’s saying. He really doesn’t seem to like you. But that’s the least of your concern.

You rest close by being enchanted by all the flashing lights and different buildings and skyscrapers with enchanting names such as; ‘New Things I learnt Encyclopedia’, ‘Guilty Pleasures town’, ‘Music-Phoria home’, ‘Skates City’ and more. What attracts you more are the people.

Your eyes do a double take almost every time when you notice that the people.... probably all of them are lookalikes of Donghyuck but with different hairstyles and clothes. Just like the nurses and the people in the Core room, most of them just have blank faces, or eyes or mouths. Your mind easily grasps these things and you feel like your brain might explode from how weird everything is.

"Figment of his imagination? Dreamscape," You mummer out. You smile when recalling how much of a brainy tech nerd Donghyuck is even internally. “That’s my Hyuck,”

"Everything that he breathes lives here." Mr Zhong nods his head. "Night time. When Donghyuck sleeps, he's left to dream by The Dreamers in Dreamland. They're the ones who coordinate his dream and guide him to a dream or not. While he's out, his Mind, Body and Core begin to rest up. We don’t sleep, we can’t, instead we rest. That basically means the people who work in his Body come out here, the people who work in his Mind come out here and the Core people come out here."

You and Mr Zhong go inside a yellow building called, The Commune, with high shelves, comfortable lounging spaces and such a cozy warm place, the place has such a comfort feeling. Going to the top floor, you and Mr Zhong walk past some people who are seated on the one seat couch or tables as they read quietly or talk together. There’s such harmony. Mr Zhong leads you outside where there are some tables and chairs, but even outside still looks so nice and impressive. You and Mr Zhong draw to the rail and sit on the high stools there, getting sucked into the sporting lights and peaceful sights of the Dreamscape City. The illuminating night sky as well, draws you close and into everything. The night sky is composed of stars that look like objects and faces… little white dots in the sky. You smile when you see your own face.

"Don’t get too comfortable." Mr Zhong breathes out and you face him taking in the structure of his hard face. He's got soft slightly plumped lips, a firm jaw that holds up his face proudly, high cheek bones, slit eyes that are partially open and his hair is a midnight black... just like his whole attire. A very...not so much Donghyuck look alike.

“How come you look so different?” You ask. “Everyone here looks like Donghyuck but you-”

“You’re different too.” Is his response. You don’t press much into it, as you see him giving you such cold eyes. He breathes out again rolling his eyes, as he thinks on how to break down everything to you. "I know you don't like hearing this, but you're dead. I'm sorry," Despite his words sounding sincere you don’t like how he looks at you, or the fact that he doesn’t appreciate your presence with him. “And you have to come in terms with that fact, because it’ll help you get out of here faster.”

You let out a soft breath. There's no denying it now, because you believe it yourself too that you’re dead. But you don’t even know where you are? So why is he so eager to have you out? “Honestly, you keep telling me I’m inside of Donghyuck, but I really don’t even understand anything. If I’m dead, why am I here?”

"When people die, good or bad, they go to a waiting place. Where they wait for their judgement and verdict on hell or heaven. In their waiting place, they're like spirits who wander the earth. With physical eyes you can't see them or feel them, but they can see and feel you. You're supposed to be there right now and your spirit is not supposed to be here. But Donghyuck has done the impossible, yet again." Mr Zhong's lips halt and he looks away from you.

“Yet again?” You question. “What does that even mean?”

“Tell me, when you were hit by that car, did you feel your spirit going…”

Thinking back, you recall how your soul felt like it was getting out of your body. “I actually did feel that.”

“That was your spirit already taking flight from the pain. So I don’t know how he did it but… your spirit was drawn to him before you could walk off to the ‘bright white light’. What do you remember?”

“Dying.” You answer honestly and sadly. “But nothing else. I woke up here thinking that I woke up in the hospital. What do you mean when you say he’s done this before? Is that why you’re here and look diff-”

“Stop asking questions, listen.” Mr Zhong wastes no time in allowing you to speak. “For now nobody seems to know that you’re here, let’s keep it like that. The best thing I can tell you now is that if we work together we’ll be able to get you out of here before it’s too late, and before everyone begins to notice. You see now, they aren’t even looking at you.”

“What kind of best news is that?” You furrow your brow. “And what do you mean-”

Mr Zhong groans out being annoyed. “What do you mean this- what do you mean that- you ask too many questions. Do you think you could listen for once in yourlife?”

“That’s because I’m trying to-”

“If I tell you that Donghyuck can’t move on and that’s why you’re here, will you be able to understand that?”

"He can't move on? I mean what do you expect… I just died." Although your tone is saddened, your questions are endless, but if it’s answers you want, then you’ll get them. One way or another, even if he’s being difficult. “Well at least tell me about this place and why you want me gone so bad?”

"You see, the people here are all Donghyuck's self-made conscious. They're all born with purpose. For example, everyone in this building is tasked to read or socialize over matters that Donghyuck wonders about. One of the popular discussions in his head is whether we have 1 butt or 2 butts-”

You laugh, remembering how you and Donghyuck would argue on end about the said subject. He'd bring up points you've never even thought about and it was always such a discussion with depth- rather then it being silly. You stop laughing seeing Mr Zhong just staring at you irritated.

"The place where you came out of- is like the neck of birth. All of the time, it's Donghyuck being born again with a new trait and that trait moves on to its assigned Member. Now the problem is, you haven’t been assigned, which ultimately makes you a lover. Someone that Donghyuck has kept because…” Mr Zhong stops himself before trying to find better words. “Because he doesn’t want to lose you. There are 3 types of Members here, namely: Mind, Body and Core." Mr Zhong sticks out 3 fingers. "Mind members are the ones who initiate thoughts and strategies, analyzing, thinking, making plans and short term memory or long. They are the ones who fuel this place up with ideas and ideologies, they make up half of Donghyuck's conscious. Typically, they're the ones who work all over. They monitor him as his spoken conscious, they monitor eyes and ears. You know the little thoughts in your head, or the feelings you suddenly feel when you're with a person, or that one voice you speak to in your head by yourself? That's the Mind members.”

You nod you head. “What department are we-”

“Well maybe if you stopped talking I’d be able to fill you in properly without jumping and skipping. His sharp tone has you leaning back and silencing yourself. “Body members are the desires and cravings of this place. Anything they desire or lust after, they fuel to the body. The mostly deal with his senses of touch and movements. Meaning for example, if Donghyuck started liking yoga, then there are yoga body members who are born and have the necessary knowledge on yoga. Naturally the Body members main station is down to the body below the neck, but from time to time the Organs and Nerves system will come up to build awareness for new things that Donghyuck's body has started liking. And then we have the Soul, but commonly known here as a Core members, this is my department. Considering you touched him, this is… your temporary placement."

“My-” His sudden sharp stare has you shutting your mouth discontinuing your question.

"Core members work in the Upper room, they control room whereby we're in charge of his purpose, his meaning to life, his intelligence, his personality… we incorporate together with the Body and Mind to create Donghyuck as a whole. While the Mind members are everywhere of his conscious, the core makes up 1 half, just as the body makes the other half. The one mostly in control is the Mind, second in charge is me, however other times the body is stubborn and refuses to be third, so it’s tug and war sometimes. Especially if what the body wants to do is stupid.” Mr Zhong explains.

“You talk as if the Mind, Core and Body have a spokesperson,”

“They all do. I hope you don’t get to meet them. Your task should be to get Donghyuck to move on.”

“Again with this.” You huff and look away.

Mr Zhong stares at your side profile. “Tell me something. You’ve been here for a week now-”

“A week? It hasn’t felt like a week, it feels like literally 1 whole day.”

“Time moves quick here.” Mr Zhong brushes off quick and continues in his speech. “And that should let you know that you’re losing your chances of a quick escape.”

“Okay. I understand that I’m dead. I kind of understand that Donghyuck doesn’t want to move on that’s why I’m here, but I don’t get your constant need for me to leave asap.”

“Because you’re different from everybody else here.” He states.

Staring back at him, you want to bite your tongue back but the words don’t stay in. “News flash you’re also here and you’re the only different looking guy.”

“And you think that’s nice? You think that it’s a good thing being here?” He questions sternly, his voice being so threatening. His anger is bright and clear in his eyes, but… something in his eyes evoke this… pain… hidden so deep. “Call me what you want, but I’m trying to help you. It may not look like it. But really I am.”

“You don’t even like me.” Your mouth let’s out again.

“No I don’t.” He admits. That makes you feel some way. “But Donghyuck loves you. The Mind, Haechan loves you, and Body Sun loves you too. Donghyuck as a whole loves you, more than anything in this world, he loves you. Heck he was even going to die because he didn’t want to live without you. Listen here Y/n, just because I don’t like you, doesn’t mean that I don’t want what’s best for you. And believe me, leaving is what’s best for you. Going to heaven… or hell, is best for you than being trapped in here. The longer you stay here, the harder it’ll be to let Donghyuck go. You’ll be like me.”

You want to ask what’s wrong with that, but the way he’s going on and on has you feeling that being like him is bad. Aside from his facial difference from all the other Donghyuck’s around, you do notice that he’s the only wearing black. Of course you see others in black clothes too- but he’s black has an eerie vibe to it. His hair black, eyes black, clothes black, even his complexion, against all the black makes him look incredibly angry… dark.

“Take what happened earlier tonight. I don’t know if you’ve noticed but the Mind members are kind of lamenting and mourning your death, and by doing that they’ve given us temporary control of Donghyuck. We need to keep Donghyuck in check all the time now. While we were in control of his thoughts. His Body, just wanted to die, like I said he didn’t want to be third so he took control. Hence the room turning black. We lost Donghyuck to the control of his Body, and at times that can be the most dangerous of situations to be in. Basically, this period in Donghyuck’s life will be tough, because he has to let you go, so that you can be free." Mr Zhong slowly nods his head. He doesn’t know how you’re taking the news, but he’s trying to be honest with you, without letting you know too much.

“I don’t see what’s so bad about that.” You mumble looking away from him. Mr Zhong rolls his eyes. “For someone who’s also inside of Donghyuck, you really don’t embody anything that he likes. I bet you’re probably the one that takes over when Donghyuck and I argue.”

“I actually do. I think Donghyuck can do way better-” He shuts his mouth hearing you scoff angrily. “You’re scoffing? Didn’t you cheat on him?”

You suck in a sharp breath and look at him in astonishment. “That happened a long time ago.”

“Yep and it’s still the main reason why you and him argued.”

“I didn’t cheat on him. He caught me in a bad time with Jaemin.”

“Mhm. You’re dead now so it’s pointless. You’ll no longer argue about that.” He nods his head not convinced by your statement, at the same time puts you back in your place of death. "Thank you by the way.”

You’re still so high from the conversation, that you furrow your eyebrows when he suddenly says that thank you. “Thank you? What are you thanking me for?” You grumpily say and try to ignore the mini argument you had.

“You brought the Core out of the influence of the Body. I bet it wasn't easy, however you handled him well."

“This is crazy,” You blink your eyes to the stars above. “I just wanted to spend the rest of my night with Donghyuck, but now a week has passed, I’m supposedly dead—there’s just so much going on. And it all feels like a really long nightmare that I can’t stop. And you’re just so annoying and infuriating.” You shake your head and scoff. “I just wanted to touch him and hug him and just..."

“I get what you’re feeling, but complaining won’t do anything.” Mr Zhong, this time, gently interrupts causing you to huff in air and sulk. “Despite not liking you, I feel everything that he feels for you.” Mr Zhong turns his head in your direction. You're looking at the stars. He can only hope to get you out of here as soon as possible. “If you want this nightmare to stop. You need to get out of here and occupy your own spirit. Your spirit needs to go and rest in it’s rightful place.”

You ignore him and just look at the stars. Your mind blank. This can’t be real.

“I can’t risk the others seeing you, so I’ll need you to hide out in the Upper controls room, preferably in my room.” Mr Zhong gets up. “There’s a meeting I need to attend.”

“A meeting?”

“Yes, with all the other elements in Donghyuck. Our discussion is on the accident that happened. We need to head back so that I can make it in time and argue for you.”

“Can I come?”

“I just told that you need to lay low and hide out.” He grumbles. “So, no. You cannot come.”

Despite what Mr Zhong said, you find yourself with a mask over your face and large hoodie that you accidently stole from The Commune you were in. While Mr Zhong goes on leaving you in his room, you end up leaving and following some of the Core members into an auditorium like building. Where the meeting already seems to be in progression between:

Body, Mind and Core.

The names that Mr Zhong didn’t want you to know, you now know when associating yourself with the 3 members who stand at the center of the whole room. There’s ‘Sun’ (The Body), Mr Zhong (The Core) and Haechan (the Mind). One in all white (Sun), another in all grey (Haechan) and Mr Zhong in all black. The other two look a lot like Donghyuck and you can almost feel a connection to them both.

All of them are representatives. Sun and Mr Zhong report to Haechan. Haechan is in control of Donghyuck’s entirety. Sun and Mr Zhong work separately yet together to achieve the full personality of Donghyuck.

The Core’s representative is of course Mr Zhong. He stands on his own podium, looking to the rest of the present core, mind and body of members inside of Donghyuck. “The events of some night ago hit us all gravely. Donghyuck nearly drove himself to death. And that was because he was under the watchful eye of the Body members, while the Mind went into a crying cave. Donghyuck nearly tried to commit suicide. However, the Core was able to get Donghyuck back to his senses and allow him time to grieve. So, as this period in Donghyuck’s life seems to be one that is tragic, I suggest, we’ll give him a few days of grieving, before he can slowly return back to his habitual patterns and daily life. We wouldn’t want him to rashly commit suicide again.” It seems like a reasonable plan to get Donghyuck back in motion, yet the Body and Mind are opposing. “I suggest perhaps a period of 2 weeks, before we can allow him to move on-”

The Body’s representative, ‘Sun’, however has a loud mouth when speaking. “Firstly I apologize for my rash decisions. I know we were all overwhelmed and all just wanted to die. I shouldn’t have pushed that agenda. But, I don’t have to be the one to remind you and everyone else, that something happened that night. We felt the presence of Y/n. A ghostly hand belonging to her. A soft voice reminding us to carry on. She was there.” He states firmly. “Y/n was our everything. To have her there was a sign that we should… we should seek her.” That gets the crowd murmuring by that ghostly presence.

The one thing weird about being in Donghyuck’s mind, is adjusting to how everyone looks. While some only have ears and nothing else on their faces, others had Donghyuck’s full face, however they had unique looks, their own purposes and weren’t exactly like the Donghyuck you fell in love with. So, as you watch ‘Sun’ speak with so much passion towards you, your heart hurts… to think that you’d never be able to see Donghyuck the same way again is something that you find… weird. You’re inside of him and are surrounded with his traits and several personalities, but not one of them embodies all of those traits. While you can fall in love with his individual presences, you can’t fall in love with him as a whole anymore.

“I felt it too. And not just that night, but I… it sounds weird but I feel her here. I know she’s watching over us.” The Mind’s representative, Haechan speaks. It’s the first time he’s speaking. And instantly hearing his voice and seeing his facial expressions, you know that this… he’s the closest thing to Donghyuck. Why? The way he looks and reasons just highlights so much of Donghyuck.

It’s him. Heck… he’s even called Haechan. Your sunshine… “Hyuck,” you lowly call out.

Not expecting his ears to rise a little, his eyes turn to the side… he freezes on spot. You. The mere eye contact you make with him has both of your hearts beating rapidly fast. You can’t take your eyes off of him, you can’t stop looking at him. You swear that his emotions begin to enlighten… just as much as he seems much more attentive to you. You want to hide, just as Mr Zhong told you to do just in case someone saw you… but it’s so weird. You can’t look away from those eyes. The same eyes you fell in love with is now looking back at you. You watch as the tears fill his eyes… His lips tremble. “Y/n-”

“Haechan.” Mr Zhong calls quickly when noticing that Haechan staring into the distance. And of course a part of him is not surprised to see you there. Of course you’re here, you followed him. Idiot.

“Why else…” Haechan leans on the podium, his eyes flickering to yours once in a while. “Why else would she appear in the spiritual sense to save Donghyuck out of the blue? It’s crazy… but… I think she’s here.” While Mr Zhong’s eyes enlarge, the crowd at large gasps in astonishment. “Some nurses reported back to me that she was here… I don’t know what to make of it, but if she’s really here… then it’s a sign for us to keep her here,”

“No.” And that’s where Mr Zhong’s problem starts. While he’s the only different looking and only different person within Donghyuck’s head, everyone in here still respected him, however when it came to making decisions he was out numbered, by the number of little Haechan’s and Sun’s who’d all think the same. “Or maybe if she is here, it’s for no other purpose except to help Donghyuck to move on.” Mr Zhong tries to reason.

“I call bull on that shit.” Sun shakes his head. “Haechan is right. Something is happening. We as the body have been doing Yoga and we found out about all types of spirits and energies that can enter into a person when you call upon them. I think we should try that for Y/n.”

Mr Zhong shakes his head with disbelief. “What the actual hell did you just say? You want to summon her spirit?”

“Yes.” It comes as a surprise for Mr Zhong as well as you when everyone in the auditorium nods their heads and chants out ‘yes’!

“In fact I think if we do it right, we might even bring her back to life-”

“That doesn’t make sense!” Mr Zhong tries to cut out through the noise. Even his own core members were agreeing to this. “Do you guys realize that by doing this, you will ruin her spirit- and her chance to get true peace?” Mr Zhong stresses out, and that’s something that gets your attention. “She doesn’t belong here with him. She belongs wherever spirits go when they die.”

“If we’re all here why can’t she be here?” Sun enquires.

“She’s meant to be here. And if she already is here… maybe she’s scared… maybe she… maybe she wants to come out but she’s scared that we want to chase her way.” Haechan speaks again softly. Your head turns to the gloomy looking Haechan who’s so depressed when speaking and even when looking around. His eyes linger on yours again- and you feel all sorts of vulnerability. His eyes always had that affect. “I think it’s good if we’re gentle in this matter not to scare her.”

“No.” Mr Zhong’s voice breaks the peace everyone is in. Everyone in the crowd looks at him like he is going mad, they ignore him and slowly begin to chant:

‘Gentleness-’

Your head turns around to all the faces, ears, eyes, mouths, and generally everyone seems to be in agreement. Of course they are, they’re all Donghyuck. Sun takes center position and lifting his hands up. “I think it’s best to make a vow. That if we see her we should vow to never forget about her. To make her feel welcomed and that we don’t plan on letting her go. We vow to never move on without her-”

“No!” Mr Zhong bangs the podium yelling out. “For heaven’s sake! This is not a game. This is a gamble with someone’s spirit. Plus this isn’t something… something that everyone has agreed to.”

“I’m about sick and tired of you refusing to accept her.” Haechan equally raises his voice. “Maybe it’s you she’s afraid of. Maybe she feels unwelcomed by your energy. Cut it out! Can’t you see that we all miss her, can’t you feel just how near she is-”

Mr Zhong stands up in defending himself. “This isn’t something that everyone has agreed upon-”

“Can you hear them Mr Zhong?” Sun gives Mr Zhong such an attitude and holds his hand to the crowd causing them to let out an ear piercing scream. “They’ve spoken.”

“No they haven’t.” Mr Zhong solely fights for you. But yet, you can’t understand why he wants you gone so bad. Especially if Haechan and Sun are giving you a chance to stay. If you’re here, it surely means something… It’s what Haechan said. “This isn’t a democracy, this is someone’s life, spirit on the line. If you do this, there’s no going back. Haechan,” Mr Zhong looks to the Mind. “Right now, you’re just sad. You’re not thinking straight. If you allow this to happen, if you make this vow, you’ll be repeating a mistake. Should I be the one to take you to long term memory? Please. I’m begging you. I’m trying to prevent that. Please.”

Very subtly, the Mind, Haechan, looks to you and his heart quenches up. It really is you. There’s no denying it now. Your eyes are clear and he knows what you’re feeling… He’s just as confused of you being here… but how can this be? Is he dreaming? Normally, his colors where bright and bubbly and had a balance because he also looked after Donghyuck’s heart and everything else surrounding his energy. When the Core and Body found no agreement, he was the final decision to everything. The Mind is always the bridging gap between the Core and Body. However, as Haechan’s eyes are grey and brown, it only shows how much your death has affected him deeply, intensely… progressively that he doesn’t mind making a terrible decision.

“Please don’t be afraid to come out… I’m here.”

You blink your eyes a little, the tears slipping more before quietly getting up and leaving the auditorium. Haechan too follows your going figure. He wants to chase and follow after you- but Mr Zhong is in front of him. “I need to go.”

“No you don’t.” Mr Zhong stops him. “Please Haechan. The unconscious part of you knows better than anyone what bringing her soul here means. Or do you need me to go and find the memories for you so that you can see-”

“I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I need to go to my room. Tomorrow is Friday. There’s a speech we need to prepare. Remember?”

[Friday, 10:45 a.m.]

Donghyuck isn't feeling too well as he leans on the wall of your once bright lively bedroom. His eyes are on the ground to a box of items that belonged to you. Your older brother Taeyong found it fit to give him some of the things you cherished. Donghyuck squats down and begins picking, moving his hand around the box looking for something particular- "There is it." Donghyuck pulls out a ring...

A promise ‘purity’ ring. This was on your body last, your finger before they removed it. Just looking at his makes his eyes water... How could you be gone? Just like that, how could you go? He sharply sucks in his breath when hearing the bedroom door open.

"Hey," It's Taeyong. "We're about to start."

"Cool." Donghyuck wipes his eyes. "I'll be down."

Giving him a moment to pull himself together, Taeyong walks out your old room first and then goes down the steps. This house once used to be a home filled with so much love and care. But it only took your parents dying, also in a car accident, to break the foundation of the family. Taeyong, Mark and you were siblings who loved each other so much and dearly, yet once your parents died something shifted in all of you. There was a lack of connections or understanding between you all. While it was evident that Taeyong tried to bring his siblings back together and become the man of the house, he couldn't find himself being strong for both you and Mark. While you and Mark confided in each other and got closer, Taeyong drifted further apart from the both of you as he made sure that you both went to good schools, colleges and even found good work. Under Taeyong's guidance, Taeyong managed to afford a student accommodation for Mark because Mark got a scholarship in a top university. Just like Mark, you also achieved good marks and got a bursary were they paid your full tuition as well as housing fees. Happy to have sent you and Mark to good schools, Taeyong was able to look after the house and move out, leaving it as a treasured piece of their family. Their parents were buried in the backyard and he only saw it fit to keep it as a memory house, as a personal cemetery for their family.

However, upon your passing, Taeyong sits outside with tears in his eyes. He never wanted you to die, he still wanted to send you off into a good marriage with a good man, he wanted to see you give birth to many children and be happy, because even though he failed to get closer to you he still loved you as his little sister. But now you're gone and can only look at your coffin that's in the middle of the backyard.

Mark is seated on one of the chairs alongside a few of the distant family relatives and your friends. He hates the feelings he's feeling. But there's nothing for him to do except stare down on the ground while some of your friends play a lovely song on their violins to slowly start the ceremony. The instrumental is so good that it takes him down the memory lane he had with you. He remembers the last time he spoke to you, you were jubilant and excited as ever for getting a job in a nice office of a company that you had admired for long. Credit Insurance Company. He recalls how joyful you were and how everything you spoke about was almost like reminiscing on your life... It's like you knew that you were gonna die. Because Mark can still remember your last words. 'Goodbye Markie. Hopefully the next time we see each other I'll be covered in all white, head to toe full of riches.' You only meant it as a joke of how rich you were going to be, but now it's the last thing he'll ever remember from you.

Donghyuck sits next to Mark absorbing the somber feeling and nonchalant feeling. It doesn’t help that the violin fuels into the pain he’s feeling in his soul.

Taeyong gets on the grass setup of an alter with flowers and pictures of you, while your coffin is stacked next to your pictures. "Thank you for that beautiful symphony. It was a masterpiece. This was my sister’s favorite song. She loved music, specifically the instrumentals because, she could always hear the unsaid words that were said. She always connected to instrumentals. I bought her... her first ipod and the first song she had on it, Near to thee my God. A song that was played at our parents’ funeral. I hope… that right now.." Taeyong gulps down the lump on his throat and looks at your body. "That she’s near to them…”

Taeyong shakes his head.

“Thank you all for joining us, in this ceremony. It's not fair that we’re here in memorial of my little sister. We should’ve been here to celebrate, but we’re here in remembrance. Gone so young, gone too soon. Life, another shit show. It's not fair that she's meeting mum and dad in heaven. It's not fair that she's left us behind. It's not even fair that we're here in honor of her death. It’s just unfair. Even though I'm her brother, her brother who barely spoke to her, I loved her so much. In times when I thought of her, I remembered the small things. The arguments we'd have about how much she hated cheese burger but loved cheese and she'd always nag that tomato is a vegetable, but it was a fruit. Her random topics being too… She was so dumb, but yet so intelligent." Taeyong finds himself bitterly chuckling and sniffing. "She always lit up the room, always had something to say. Whenever she’d step in, you’d know that she was there. Even if we hardly spoke to each other, she always made me happy with her presence. I think Mark can agree with me that she was the pride and dearest of our family. The best gift I've ever gotten was having a baby sister who I could look after and make sure that she kept smiling no matter what. I love you Y/n. Where ever you are, I love you, and I wish I told you that more."

Mr Zhong standing right next to your coffin watches you as you're seated on the floor looking up to your brother with so much admiration. It's true you never spoke a lot, but it's also true that you loved him so much. You always wanted to make him proud and not make him disappointed for sending you off to school- he gave up on school so that you and Mark could make it far. He had lots of self-hate because he thinks he drifted far from you, but he didn't even know that he was the center of your pride. You stand up and move closer to him and focus when you wrap your arms around him-

Mr Zhong watches the effect of the hug and what it does to Taeyong. Right on the spot Taeyong bursts out crying, only irking you to cry more as you whisper how much you love him and never hated him, and how much you looked up to him. You thank him and give him a kiss on the cheek. Taeyong can feel this presence like a warm blanket coming over him. He moves to his seat not being able to handle the overwhelming warmth coating him and little whispers of your voice saying you love him too.

Next up, Mark gets on the pulpit a little wobbly. It only takes one look at your coffin for him to begin crying and releasing all the tears he tried to hide. He doesn't know why he can't stop himself from crying, but Mr Zhong watches how your crying has an effect on Mark. You hold him tightly while he cries and you cry so much.

Taeyong gets up and moves forward to his brother, giving him a firm hug and never letting Mark go, Mark shakes his head in denial and can't even make out words when feeling so much sadness come over him. You join in on the hug that your brothers have, and from the side Mr Zhong has a somber face. He hated funerals. He hated them with a passion. But it was a law, a mind law that even when you die, you have to be present at your funeral to see the people who love you one last time before you'd get all ties with them. So while his eyes get watery by your tears and your brothers tears, he has no choice but to keep standing by your coffin with your body in a white dress. He sighs when Taeyong and Mark move over to sit down. A friend comes to speak, says short tearful words about how she knew you were her real friend. A distant family member speaks of your enthusiastic behavior, another group of friends play an instrumental in tribute to your love for a specific movie, and then next on stage is Donghyuck.

The one you’ve been waiting for. The reason why your life began to make sense after your parents’ death. The one who said love and you knew what it meant, took you out of that broken place you had placed yourself in, kissed you and you knew who you were. When you were lost, you simply looked into his eyes and you knew who you were because he was there. He has always been there for you. You feel like you’ve betrayed him, because you left. You left him all alone.

Donghyuck’s hands shaking uncontrollably pull out a white piece of paper that he wrote on the days you died. He tries to keep his cool but just seeing two of your brothers break down as well as everyone who you had a close bond with, only has him shaking and trying not to fall apart too. "In loving memory of my girlfriend. Maybe I’ll start by saying I’ll never regret loving you. But I must say, I wish things turned out the way we wanted it to be. I would never know what love was until you brought me the definition. You were there in the right time and place and time, you saw and you opened my eyes to a whole new world. That’s why I’m unprepared to let you go. You mean everything to me. I am not prepared to see you like this… in this coffin. We had plans, a bucket list to cross of. Growing old together, getting married, having kids, getting to open up each other more. Maybe along the way we would’ve gotten tired of each other, but in all the years I’ve been with you, even after arguments, I’ve never gotten tired of you. I love you. But now, I see you in white, inside a box with all our broken promises. I’m not ready to let you go. I don’t want to say goodbye. I don’t want to move on. I want to acknowledge all the feelings you made me feel, I never want to let you go. I am glad that I opened my doors for you because you gave me a lot of reasons to continue living even though I was hurting. Remember when I was on the verge of giving up on life and … you saved me? Just like always you came to my rescue like a shining armor. It was surreal. You told me to live. But how am I supposed to live when you’re not here anymore. Please if you can, show me a sign again. Show me that you are near. Y/n, I prayed for you to come back. I need you to be back here with me, with your brothers and friends. But… I know it’s impossible. Because the cold hands of death snatched you away from this cruel earth. This earth doesn’t deserve you, but why did you leave me? Don’t I deserve you?”

Donghyuck gulps when his tears block his vision.

“Since you passed away, life hasn't been the same. If I could, I would move to heaven just to be with you. I would turn back time to have you here on earth with me again. The time we spent together meant the world to me, your laughter and your precious smile always made my heart beat- even when we fought. It always took 3 minutes to make everything alright again. We always came back to each other even though we’d drift apart. I remember those times because it made me feel that whatever I’d do, or what you’d do could never break us apart because we always knew the way back to each other, to try and fix it. " Donghyuck shivers and grunts lowly when his eyes get blurry. "No one will ever know, what it's like to lose someone who’s saved them countless of times from destruction. I miss you... I want to move on, but I can't. I can't move on when you're not here. I won't find another one because you'll always be in my heart. Maybe I will, but I don’t want to. I only want you. I’ve only wished it to be you."

Mr Zhong shakes his head when hearing Donghyuck declare the words that would be your entire existence.

“No one will ever know what it’s like to lose the love of your life just when things were only getting to the best parts. Because I was there when that cruel car drove into you and took your breath away, Y/n, it didn’t have to end that way, you still had so much life. But if it’s this way, please just come back to us and let us say goodbye properly. I’m sorry for this to be the end of our love story… but I know you’re not gone. You’re still here. Inside of your brothers, of your friends, of family, you’re also inside of me.” Donghyuck sniffs. While Mr Zhong is in the corner disliking the words that Donghyuck is confessing, you’re on the ground holding tightly onto his torso.

Mr Zhong sits through your funeral, watching your friends from school an internship place speak such wonderful words about you. He watches how your body is sunk into the ground, everyone being a crying mess… you really had an impact on people. He watches family bid their last good byes, he watches your brother and Donghyuck spend a few more minutes around the spot they buried you. He watches how they’re the first ones to throw a shovel of dirt onto your coffin. Everything feels too real for you, but you’re in a mass crying hysteria as everything unfolds. This is not at all how you imagined your life to end, so to see this all happening is unreal. Mr Zhong watches as the people begin to pack up, how your brothers don’t move from your spot- Mr Zhong watches it all. His own eyes glistening with tears. Day turns to afternoon, and afternoon turns to night…

The last person remaining in the burial sight is Donghyuck. Taeyong and Mark are in the house preparing some food. Donghyuck is seated on the ground watching the place where they buried you. The next day they’d continue to place the rest of the burial ‘ornaments’. For now he can only look at the soil that has covered up the grave and coffin. His mind is blank of emotions.

Meanwhile you’re next to him laying your head on his shoulder. It takes you focusing all of your might into just holding him, but once you get the grip you never let him go. Donghyuck can feel it… he feels a strange sense of comfort by the warmth over his arm. He doesn’t try to move afraid that it might go away… instead he uses this moment to speak to you.

Mr Zhong knows that inside of Donghyuck, it’s Haechan who is in control right now. “Y/n… are you… are you here?”

“Yes I am,” But he can’t hear you. Just the wind blowing.

“I miss you,” He carries on but stops himself when the tears come rushing out again and he’s crying so much. Your own eyes are already puffed up from crying heavily after hearing all your family and friends lament on your death. Mr Zhong disappeared a while ago leaving you alone on the surface with Donghyuck. So to hear him cry, you know that inside Haechan is crying whole heartedly. Literally.

In a shift, a blink of an eye you see Donghyuck get up. “Hyuck,” You call him. “What’s wrong? Where are you going?”

You can’t hear it, but for some reason you know that he’s having internal conflicts again… as he paces back and forth and trembles and his eyes literally look like they’re thinking. It’s all because you were inside of him, you know how everyone is operating there. He makes a rash decision when he suddenly and swiftly punches himself in the face! He falls on the ground and you gasp- what was that. You move to his side trying your hardest to do something from the outside. If Mr Zhong is doing something in there to prevent another ‘Donghyuck shut down’ then perhaps you can you also do something out here. So with all your concentration, you place your hands over his shoulder and you stare at his face that’s in anguish and distress.

“Hey, Hyuck,” You lowly say… Donghyuck’s ears aren’t prepared to hear the spiritual world, but he does hear your voice. Instantly that has him frozen. You keep looking into his eyes hoping he can just stay focused on you- but his eyes shift around- an indication that he can’t see you, but he did hear you… “Please calm down,” you try hard to let him hear the words… and… surprisingly he crosses his legs and nods his head.

“Okay,”

You breathe out, having him back for a bit. You stay with him, this time wrapping your arms around him as you straddle his waist. Hopefully he can feel that… he can.

“Hey Donghyuck, supper’s ready,” Donghyuck doesn’t want to snap out of the daze he was in when hearing your voice and sorta feeling this embrace around him. But as Taeyong calls he sighs out when instantly everything he was feeling, vanishes away. He gets up and heads into the warmly lit home with Taeyong and Mark and takes a seat with the brothers and eats…

You take a seat on the table simply watching them eat. Your heart mourns and aches to be this close to them. “It’s time to go back.” Your head snaps to the side where you see Mr Zhong standing by the corner of the kitchen as if he’s in the shadows. “We have to go back.”

“Can’t you just wait for a few minutes?”

“No I can’t. It’s urgent we move now.”

“How do you expect me to go when my brothers and boyfriend are still wounded?” You question not budging.

“For once in your goddamn life can you just stop asking questions and follow me.” Mr Zhong, frustrated, grumbles. “Come on.”

“Do you guys… feel it?” This is Mark who asks. Both you and Mr Zhong freeze and turn to him, wanting to hear what he’ll say. “Do you feel how empty it is in the house without her?”

Taeyong nods his head and so does Donghyuck. Meanwhile Mr Zhong stomps to the table and grabs your hand. “Let’s go-”

“Let me go!” You yell trying to force yourself away from him!

“Did anyone else hear that?” Donghyuck questions, but this time Mr Zhong doesn’t stop until he’s pulling you off the table and into his personal elevator.

“Gosh! Why do you have to be so infuriatingly frustrating!” You yell out spinning around grabbing your hair. The anger soon turns to tears watching the lift close and your brothers and boyfriend disappearing from your view. “I just want to be with my family. I just want to be with them.”

Your crying doesn’t phase Mr Zhong nor does it stop even when the doors open back into the room of the core members. Mr Zhong picks you up and drags you to your room… well… his room. It’s dark in here. Like a punishment. You can see nothing but pure darkness. It’s an abyss and you’re afraid of it. Mr Zhong leaves you there for 5 whole minutes. That’s how long it takes you to stop crying and begin to fear the dark. Thank goodness he comes back, the little light emitted from the door way makes you immediately stand up. However he crosses his arms.

“Because I can’t trust you out there I’m going to leave you in here-”

“What?”

“And the next step we, we as Donghyuck’s core, will try to get him to move on, because this already looks like an unhealthy way to deal with losing someone.”

“You can’t do that-”

“I can.”

“No you can’t-”

“Watch me.” Mr Zhong voices aloud. “You’re not supposed to be here, the faster he moves on then the better. If you can’t help us with that, then we’re doing this without you. Stop leading Donghyuck on.” Are Mr Zhong’s final words to you.

You’re a little too late to react when he shuts the door and you’re swarmed with internal darkness all over again. You leap off the bed and run to the door trying to unlock it and shake it- to no avail it doesn’t budge. It starts off with you yelling for him to let you out! Before it turns to you banging out the door! You begin to get paranoid yelling and banging! Minutes turn to hours very quick and you’re met with no response. You don’t know how long you remain in the same position before paranoia turns to tears and you’re now wailing in the dark room. And then, like a good cry always does, you fall asleep.

Donghyuck finishes eating and thanks Taeyong and Mark for the meal, before he heads on home. Without his car, he opts for transport services. However, selecting what address to put, he contemplates between the club (Sun’s doing), the park to clear his head (Mr Zhong’s doing) and home (Haechan’s doing). While inside of him they quickly try to verify what action to take, it’s decided upon going to the park. That way, they can try to have another meeting on Donghyuck’s next turning point- instead of simply just rushing in to anything and everything.

Looking at the time, it’s past 8 pm and the little twinkling lights shine blending in with the aesthetics of the park. There seems to be a self-made concert of a guy with what looks like an electric guitar. Donghyuck simply walks by to hear the words that captured his attention:

‘I can’t go back now, nothings the same. But I won’t forget how you called my name? So will you remember me? Will you remember the way that I was? Will you remember me? Will you remember the way that you felt when you were next to me? Will you remember? Do you remember?’

Donghyuck finds himself taking a seat on the grass along with the other singles/couples scattered on the grass as they listen to the guy sing with his slightly raspy voice. The guy goes on to singing a few more songs, before he opens up his eyes that had been closed since Donghyuck came. “Thank you,” That gets the little crowd gathered to applaud for him. Donghyuck is surprised how instantly when the guy gets up, there aren’t girls swarming him with how good his vocals were- he’s just in shock how the guy gets up and begins walking away. Taking his chance, Donghyuck follows him. This being Sun’s doing, as he’s also been interested in singing and would love to hear this guy’s inspiration and would also like to thank the guy. “Hey, man, dude,”

That gets the strangers attention as he turns around curiously, to see if they were calling him. And upon seeing Donghyuck he smiles gently. “Oh hey,”

“What? Aren’t you going to wait for tips after your show?”

The guy’s smile turns a bit shy as he scratches the back of his neck. “Nah, I don’t really do this for the money. But if you’ve got some tips, I’d gladly take them,”

“I’d feel awkward handing you money in cash, it’d kinda send a suspicious message,”

“I get you,” The guy chuckles. “My name’s Jeno, I don’t usually get ‘fans’ running up to me, so I assume you don’t know who I am. What’s your name?”

“What an introduction,” Donghyuck tries to stay upbeat and positive even though his smile is tired. “Well, I’m Donghyuck, some call me Haechan or Sun,”

“You must be a ray of sunshine then,” Jeno enlightens.

“Me? Nah, I’d say your voice was the sunshine in my dark world,” Donghyuck admits… a bit weakly.

Jeno sees the sadness that passes through Donghyuck’s eyes. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were flirting with me,”

“Not really,” Donghyuck gulps looking down, trying to control the sudden knock of tears. He exhales and tightly smiles looking up. “I actually buried my girlfriend today. Hearing you sing just brought me to a place. Uhm, yeah,” Deep. Is all that Jeno can think as he listens to Donghyuck. “I guess I just wanted to acknowledge you for that,”

“I guess music really does have a way to connect people together,” Jeno smiles sadly too. “Even though she’s my ex now, I can’t imagine ever losing her to death. My condolences.”

“No biggie,” Donghyuck shrugs it off, clearing his throat. “Thanks for that,”

“I may not know your girlfriend, but I bet you loved her,” Donghyuck can only swallow back tears giving a brief smile. Jeno pats Donghyuck’s shoulder. “I was actually headed to one of my pal’s get together, wanna tag along? Might help you to relieve some stress,”

Donghyuck finds himself chuckling a little. “Not even gonna call this pal to make sure it’s okay?”

“The more the merrier,” Jeno smiles nudging his head forward as a sign that they should get going. Donghyuck doesn’t mind following along with Jeno. Throughout the walk Jeno talks about his ex girlfriend and how she cheated on him, and he was really depressed and as a way to de-stress himself, music came to him and allowed him to free himself. Donghyuck listens and wonders to himself if he’ll ever move on-

No.

He hears in his head. It’s not even an option. Why should he let you go especially knowing that there’s no one who will ever make him feel the same way as you? Why should he let go when he won’t find another like you? Why should he let go when he’s promised and dedicated his life to you? Why should he let go when you were his everything? How do people who break up begin to let go so easily? Is it because they were never in love- or because they found another? Donghyuck shakes his head, there’s no point in moving on especially if he didn’t get any closure.

It's very clear to Mr Zhong that Haechan and Sun are more in control of Donghyuck’s eagerness to not letting you. It’s clear that he might have to prepare himself in seeing you everyday. And that’s not an option he likes. So finally when Jeno and Donghyuck arrive to the ‘pals’ house- Mr Zhong actually gets thrilled when seeing the familiar face of Jaemin.

Y/n’s quote on quote fling.

The house is big, there are a bunch of guys and girls not exotically all over each other, but in a friendly state of a gathering. Donghyuck over hears something from Jeno as he comments that it’s a birthday of another friend- but Donghyuck could care less, especially when Jaemin also catches Donghyuck’s eyes.

Both have a deep stare down and instantly Mr Zhong takes front and center and immediately activates anger. Donghyuck’s lips twist in anger just as Jeno picks up on the tense atmosphere. He holds onto Donghyuck’s chest and with an arm around his shoulder he forces the ladder out of Jaemin’s equally engraved bitter eyes and to the kitchen.

“Am I missing something? Do you know Jaemin-”

“F-”

“She died because of you.”

Jeno’s ears are sharp when he turns to Jaemin who sucks in a breath after following them. Donghyuck turns around his eye twitching. “I beg your pardon? What did you say?”

“You heard me.” The teary red eyes of anger stare back into Donghyuck’s eyes as Jaemin balls his fist. For a very long time his thought about this encounter. Ever since hearing about your death over social media when one of your brothers posted that- Jaemin could only think of the last conversation you had with him. “You killed her.”

Donghyuck pounces but Jeno stands between the two hastily. “Yho yho Jaemin calm yourself, it’s Renjun’s birthday and he doesn’t want any of this.”

Jaemin is far from hearing that as he stares into Donghyuck’s eyes infuriated eyes. And Donghyuck isn’t even in the room anymore as his full focus is on Jaemin. “I buried my girlfriend today. Don’t forget that, she wasn’t your girlfriend, she was my girlfrien-”

“Cut that bullshit. She’s dead now all because of you. And you know what, she didn’t have to die- but you-” Jaemin stresses looking pain stricken. “You. It’s all your fault. If you hadn’t called her out that night she would’ve still been alive- matter of fact if you just gave her that space instead of always suffocating her then maybe- just maybe would she still be-”

“Excuse me? What the hell are you on ab-”

“God you’re so full of yourself.” Jaemin tries to step forward but Jeno’s hand stops him. “I loved her and she loved me. Do you honestly think- no do you really believe that she was happy in that claustrophobic relationship you provided her? Are you shitting me? You gas lighted her-

“Jaemin-”

“You filled her head with shit. Kept hurting her, manipulating her thoughts to think that she needed you at all times. You’re so controlling that you didn’t even realize that she was getting sick of you-”

“Listen here dude you know nothing about our relationship-”

“Oh but I know plenty pal,” Jaemin cries stuffling his anger. “You think you were good for her? Shit, you were draining and knowing now how possessive you are over her- I can just imagine the loniless she endured while being with you. Do you know she called me when you’d sleep? Or do you even know how much she cried to me? Do you even know where her heart lied truly? No. Because you continuously put her down. Continuously limited her. You didn’t know that girl like I did. You did not know her. She couldn’t even get out- always waiting for you and whatever you’d say.” Jaemin sniffs in blinking the tears away. “You selfish bastard, you kept her all for yourself and still have the nerve to claim her after death-”

Donghyuck has always been considered as a weak fighter- yet when he lands a punch right against Jaemin’s jaw! No one sees it coming, and that fuels Donghyuck to pounce on Jaemin and rattle him with each of his fists while his eyes wreak havoc in tears. By now there’s a crowd formed, howls of urgency just as Jeno and a bunch of other guys hold onto Jaemin and Donghyuck separating them. In the end- Donghyuck points a deadly finger at Jaemin who’s on the floor panting out in rage. “You know nothing about us. I loved her more than anything and I know for a fact that she loved me too. You weren’t even present at her funeral so what fucking say do you have over her life- If anything you were annoying- you still are annoying. Don’t you ever, EVER, speak of her again. You filthy piece of shit.”

Donghyuck passes by the flabbergasted faces of guys and leaves the house. After a heavy and teary walk where he constantly talks out loud blaming Y/n for dying. His feet find him in a 24/7 store as he buys liquor. He chugs it down shaking his head at the overwhelming thoughts pouring in his head from meeting Jaemin. This is the first time he’s confront Jaemin. Mr Zhong is glad that he can ‘pollute’ Donghyuck’s mind to the point where Sun and Haechan are both grieved and trying to believe that really Y/n is innocent. But it’s hard to believe that, especially since all that quote on quote crap came from Jaemin.

Y/n’s fling.

This all started a year ago when your relationship with Donghyuck began getting a little rocky. You became distant, and within the time of you being away from him, you met Jaemin. At this point only heaven knows what you’ve told Jaemin. Because ever since you patched things up with Donghyuck- Donghyuck began seeing a lot more of Jaemin around you. Seems like Jaemin had caught feelings. Donghyuck would note how you’d try to hide Jaemin away-  but Jaemin was very vocal about how he felt towards you. Hell knows what you’ve done privately with Jaemin, but even the little thought of it makes Donghyuck boil. Because now you’re gone. Now you’re dead and all the answers he wants to get, he can’t get them because you’re a whole spiritual platform away from him. “How could you do this to me!? Was I really suffocating you? Then why’d you stay with me all this time? What was the point of us getting back together if your heart lied with him? What the hell was he talking about? Y/n! Why? Why? This isn’t fair.”

Getting home, slurring his words and mumbling curses to you and Jaemin’s abomination relationship. He enters his dark room.

You’re awakened when hearing a cry. By now darkness becomes your second vision when you open your eyes and still find yourself in the same dark place. But yet.. you still hear a cry. It’s Donghyuck’s cry. Why is he crying?

Feeling sad and sorrow filling you up, you think of how to get out of the room, and how to get to Donghyuck in order to help him out. You don’t like hearing him cry. Why is he crying? Meanwhile Mr Zhong on the other side of the door is with the others as they formulate a ‘Moving On Strategy’, but he doesn’t know that as you’re on the other side, miraculously you think of something…

If Mr Zhong could do it, then so can you. He mentioned something about the cyber dream being part of Donghyuck’s thoughts… imagination… So without any delay, you try your hardest and begin building in your head. You construct something that you’ve seen him use to teleport you places. That elevator…

You’re already in the elevator when you open your eyes again. Just think. Think. Where do you want to go? The elevator begins to go up high and you have to keep your self-balanced against the side when it gets rigid and shakes a little too strongly. Steady. Steady. You remind yourself while picturing Donghyuck’s room. Taking in a deep breath you allow yourself to focus and concentrate on getting the elevator to Donghyuck. Actually you don’t know why you suddenly thought of Donghyuck’s room… but it seems like the crying if from there.

The first thing you hear when the elevator door opens up is sniffing. Despite the time being 18h26 pm, his blinds shut out any light- creating a pitch back room- only being lit up by his phone’s brightness light. The room is similar to the way it was when you were in the Organs and Nerves center. You step out the elevator and carefully tread on the carpeted grounds of Donghyuck’s room. If you still had a pulse, a heartbeat, you’d be able to feel your emotions going all over the place. As soon as you see him, his disheveled appearance slouched and face so stiff in sadness, you get a headache from how stupid you’d been to have died.

Why did you have to die? Why? You were his everything… You were his, and now that he’s gone you just feel this cold atmosphere around him. Getting in front of him you bend down, holding onto his knee- only for you to nearly fall as you pass through him. You can smell that he’s drunk. You can smell that alcohol. Great. You can’t help the little squeak that leaves you, the little squeak of frustration as your head lightly throbs that you can’t touch him. Watching him in the face, and how he doesn’t even react to you is just another slap in the face that you’re… no longer living. Looking at his somber face you feel your throat clog up.

“Hyuck,” you blink when seeing he’s looking at your picture on his phone. “I’m sorry for leaving you,” You try to hold his face, but the way your ghostly hue flows past him has you just kneeling in front of him in pure and pitiful sadness. “Hyuck,”  

Your sweet voice drowning in the silence as your eyes take him in.

Your arms keep passing him but right now you feel so close to him in the sense that you’re actually here with him. You can’t just be here and he doesn’t acknowledge you. You want him to acknowledge you…

You want him to feel you…

You just want him to look you in the eye and not be sad. You can’t stand this. You can’t stand being in him when outside he’s hurting. You don’t want him to hurt anymore.

Concentrating with everything in you, you brace yourself to touch him again. This time you tell yourself that you will. If you did it before at the hospital. “Feel me…” You can do it again. “Please,” Your fingers get a grip on his face… just a tingle and he instantly reacts.

Gasping out loud and looking around, you smile a little more as the rest of your fingers slide past his face until your whole hand is against the side of his face. “Hyuck…”

“Y/n?” You’re happy that he calls out your name, only except he doesn’t look at you or acknowledge your presence. He’s probably just having a reflex again. That doesn’t stop you from sliding your arm over his leg as you get back taking a seat next to him.

“I’m here,” You tilt your head to the side, willing yourself to wrap your arms around his torso. “I feel you Hyuck,”

His reaction to your touch is subtle as he stiffens and quietly breathes out. Can he feel it? Can he feel you?

“Can you feel me?” You whisper looking up to his face. “Look at me babe,”

He let’s out your name again from his lips sniffing. His eyes an ocean of red veins with tears dripping out. “Are you… Are you here with me right now?”

“Yes,” you nod your head a smile breaking out of your lips. “I never left you,” You place your hand over his chest rubbing it. Surely he can feel it because he places his own hand over his heart and bites his trembling lip. “I’m here,”

“I miss you so much,” He cries and shuts his eyes. He can’t hear you, but he can feel you. “I miss you so much…”

“I’m here,” You whisper out sniffing.

“No you’re not here… Jaemin was right,” He cries, and you hesitate a bit when hearing the foreign name. “I should’ve never came to see you, maybe you’d still be alive, maybe you’d-”

“It’s not your fault,” You mummer sadly listening to him blame himself. You gulp and shake your head rubbing his back. “Hyuck please stop, it was never your fault.” But he continues to speak… it’s when you understand that although he can feel you he actually can’t hear you.

“I wish I was there when you took your last breath. You took your last breath to a bunch of strangers and I wasn’t even there to… be with you.” He sniffs, hiccupping. He unpleasantly leans on his knees trying to control himself and his tears. “Were you scared? Taking your last breath, were you scared to cross over to the other side… you were alone. So alone. And that fucker blames me for suffocating you. Is that how you felt? Is that how you really felt? I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Is it better that side? Is it better wherever you are?” He runs his hand over his hair. “Are you really here with me? Can’t I… follow you?”

“No.” You get on your knees and assuredly hug his knees. “Hyuck please don’t talk like this. It hurts me to see you like this. It hurts without you. It hurts not being able to live,”

“Are you… really here?”

“I am baby,” You grip him tighter. Even though he can’t hear you, you’re just filled with joy by his presence. “And I don’t plan on leaving you, so please, please Hyuck,” just stop talking nonsense.”

“You’re all worn out Donghyuck,” he faintly chuckles to himself. “You’re even hearing her voice,”

Your ears perk as he speaks. Kneeling down but facing him, you touch his face. Caressing him. “I’m in you Hyuck. I’m here,”

He scoffs. “Was that crap Jaemin was talking about true?”

“What?”

“Did I really suffocate you? Did I hurt you? Did you always call on Jaemin when I slept- was he the one you hid from me? Why didn’t you tell me anything- why didn’t you just fucking break up with me, if I was always on your case- why are you here? Why aren’t you with him? I hate that you’re gone. I hate that you left when you could’ve been alive. This is all my fault.” Donghyuck drunkenly sinks on his bed crying out. You’re just confused about everything he busted out. What was going on in the surface? Did he meet Jaemin or something? Did he really speak to Jaemin? What was Jaemin even saying- the anticipation killing you.

His eyes open up… his pupils slightly enlarge. Your eyes go all over his face and you can only wonder what he can see. He sits up on the bed still looking shocked. And this time his eyes don’t budge from yours. “Hyuck?”

His lips part and he freezes. “Y/n?” He carefully calls your name. “Is this real?” He sucks in a sharp breath. “You’re really… hey…” His eyes water up and he gently smiles.

“Hey,” You bite your lip feeling teary eyed.

“Y/n? Babe? Am I hallucinating-”

“That’s enough.” Like a shadow emerging from the darkness- a hand grips tightly onto your arm yanking you back into the shadows.

“Stop!” Of course it’s Mr Zhong. In his black suit, he gives you no time of his attention as he just drags you. You grip and try to pull away but his durability is great compared to your weak state. “Hey!”

You’re thrown on the floor of the elevator- his elevator and the doors close. Getting up you’re cross faced towards Mr Zhong however, your eyes take in the scenery of Donghyuck standing up on his feet in his dark room. He’s stationed in place with his arms lightly out. He pulls his curtain open and looks around his room. Your heart aches when you watch him bury his head in his hands before getting down on the ground shivering and another unruly cry escapes his already raspy throat.

“Have you lost your mind?” You now yell at Mr Zhong being furious. “Have you lost-”

“No the real question is, have you lost your damn freaking mind?! Why only now when we’re trying to get him to move on past you? Why are you here? Do you not understand how dangerous it is for you to be up here? What is wrong with you? Do you actually know how much risk you put yourself in when you continue to engage with Donghyuck this way-”

“I don’t care! I don’t give a damn because I’m just as broken! I’m just as sad as he is. That’s my boyfriend. I died and left him alone-”

“So why are you here!” He infuriatingly lets out, not minding that it actually hurt your feelings. “Why are you here? You should be dead!”

“I’m here because he needs me!” Holding back your tears you push him back when he gets too close. “He clearly needs me and you’re stopping me. You can’t stop me-”

“He doesn’t need you! What could he possibly do with you if you’re dead? Be depressed? Be sick? Die and follow you to the grave? Exactly. You have no place here. And that’s why you need to leave now. When you leave you’ll give him room to move on. Your presence here is holding him back-”

“I don’t want to leave him! He’s mine and I am his!” You stand your ground against him who’s just making you feel all sorts of anger. “I love him! I just want to be with him!”

His cheek pops out as he shakes his head folding his arms. “Well too bad. You just earned yourself a week in the cellar. If you do not want to cooperate with me then I’ll get you out of here by myself.”

“What is wrong with you? Why can’t I just-” The elevator door opens up and he’s back to grabbing you not paying mind to a word you say. You try to tell him to stop but he’s not letting you go. He drags you all the way to his room and tosses you inside, locking the door behind him, leaving you alone in his dark room. You huff and puff bang the door. But he doesn’t come back for you. Leaving you all alone.

Donghyuck returns back to work, melancholy and quiet. A few people from work greet him and pat his back just as others wish him well and pass their condolences. He sighs when nothing eventful happens throughout the day. He ends up going back home with the lingering thought of what occurred last night. Not the fight between him and Jaemin… but how he saw you. Or at least he wants to believe that he saw you. But he was drunk… there’s no way.

Another day passes, uneventful with him going home and sleeping. Another day passes and he feels so very alone and cries the whole day before getting up to go to work. He visits your grave, but nonetheless, he is troubled deeply. Mr Zhong inside is satisfied that everything is going according to plan. A few more days of melancholy will bring Donghyuck to slowly move on from you. And it so happens that when Donghyuck visits the grave again, he sees Taeyong.

“Oh,” Taeyong acknowledges Donghyuck. “How are you Donghyuck?”

“Hanging in there,”

“Yeah,” Making small talk with each other, they spend a good amount of time reminiscing on you that Donghyuck finally decides to open up something. “I… I’ve seen her a few times.” He meekly lets out while looking at your tombstone. “I’ve seen her a few times... even felt her. It’s like… she’s still here,”

Taeyong doesn’t respond immediately. He lets the words process before he can speak. “That night… after burying her, when we were eating… I felt her presence. It was like she was in the room with us. I don’t know what to make of it, but… If you feel her, then it should be a good sign. Maybe she’s looking after us before she… goes. Lucky you,”

-

It's sitting in the darkness of the room for several days and nights that has you feeling angry. You know what you have to do. You have to get back to Donghyuck. This guy (Mr Zhong) can’t keep trapping you down here.

If you can concentrate really hard then you might be able to get out of here. If you concentrate to the extreme you’ll be able to see him again. Only except everything in this room is dark and just so hard to see anything appear. You feel all kinds of annoyance gnawing upon you. But you hold yourself steady trying to think of an elevator again- or any means of escape. “Please let me just go to wherever Donghyuck is.” It’s only when you hear a pop(!) do you rapidly open your eyes when hearing the wind. Instead of a room, you’re actually outside. But it doesn’t appear to be the real world, instead it’s it really looks like the dreamscape city, only that it’s filled with clouds and buildings of all shapes and sizes are on the clouds. You turn your head back and forth hoping to see someone but you don’t. “Hello?” You logically call out.

“Yes?”

Snapping back and forth to find the source that is heard everywhere you look up to the pale orange bright sky. “Uhm, hi? Where are you?”

“Everywhere,” He clears out your thoughts. “Welcome to Dream Land, where every night we provide Donghyuck with a dream.”

Dreams… You can work with that. “So, what can I do if I want to be a part of Donghyuck’s dreams?” The silence follows for a few minutes, before you ask something else, not knowing if it’s ignoring you or what. “Can I be a part of Donghyuck’s dream?”

“Log in a file with Dream Corp and we’ll process it before Donghyuck arrives.”

“And where can I find that?” You furrow your brows. “And what do you mean before Donghyuck arrives?”

“Jump off.”

“What?”

This time the silence is everlasting. “I guess I’m jumping off.”

But just as you’re about to jump off- you take notice of you see him…. You see Donghyuck. You can’t believe your eyes, but you begin running towards him on the bumpy clouds. He walks to the edge just as your almost close to him and when he jumps you gasp but also jump after him. Thankfully your body clashes into his- and you grip him tight in a hug not letting him go. The wind blows and tugs on your body making you feel dizzy and sick but you hold on tight to Donghyuck. “Hyuck?” It doesn’t look like he realizes, but you see that his eyes are shut. Checking to see where you’re falling- you see the sky slowly turning dark before all of a sudden-

You’re thrusted straight onto a heavy ground. It doesn’t hurt like you expect it too- Donghyuck gets up still with his eyes closed and begins walking. There’s no time to adjust to your scenery or rather the pure blue sky with green grass blowing gently with 5 doors present for Donghyuck.

“Who’s in control?” You hear the skies asking.

“Sun.” A drowsy Donghyuck speaks.

“What door will you go through today?” The skies ask again. “We’ve got a quiet room, a nightmare seems to be brewing, a message from the angels and oh- Dream land informs me that Y/n has followed you.”

“In which… room will she be in?” You hear Donghyuck ask. As you walk forward to see his face, he doesn’t seem to be looking at you. Suddenly a thought comes inside of you to pick a door, where you’d like to speak with him.

Standing by a door, you hear the sky hum out. “She’s in room number 3. But beware, she didn’t pick an unoccupied dreamscape, she picked the dreamscape with the angels, so beware of Angels voices.

Donghyuck without hesitation follows to the room. You look at Donghyuck who opens up the door and you follow him.

-

“Where the hell is she?” As a nightly routine Mr Zhong enters your room to check up on you. Not seeing you on the bed he groans and walks in moving everywhere until he can determine that you’re not inside. Using his elevator he goes up to the surface and doesn’t see you in Donghyuck’s room. He comes back inside and furrows. He tries to sense for your presence but you’re nowhere around- he’ll be damned if he asks anyone if they’ve seen you. So he decides to go through some territories. The first is Sun.

Entering into the body territory he’s surprised to see what’s on the screen… is that… You?

“Sun what’s going on here?”

“We’re scheduled to be in Dreamland today, but you won’t believe who we encountered.” Sun speaks just as everyone looks too excited that they leap with joy around the body center. Mr Zhong shakes his head as he draws closer to the screen monitor- the monitor which reflects what Donghyuck can see in the Dream World.

You and him are talking… having a conversation. “What are they talking about?”

“We’re still in shock. We’ve been holding her here in place because his alarm clock is gonna ring in 10 minutes, we called Haechan over. He’s coming soon. It’s a shame he decided to make Donghyuck sleep at freaking 4 am in the morning, knowing very well that we need Donghyuck to rest up. The angels tried taking her away. What do you think this means?”

Mr Zhong curses. He can’t get you out of Dream Land by force, because he has no access there. How on earth did you get there? This is getting dangerous. If Haechan comes then-

“I came as quick as I heard the news. Where is she?”

“There.”

“Could it be? Is… is it really her?” He whimpers as he gets close to the screen. “Can I talk to her?”

“Yes, here.” Sun hands over the control to Haechan.

You watch Donghyuck’s head dip for a moment. “Hyuck? Hyuck? Is everything alright?” Sitting on the white blanket over the high grass, you just spent your time listening to the… angel… a huge white cloud covered in mist…. All the Angel did was stretch it’s hand towards you, repeating the phrase ‘Come home.’ You were so tempted to go… not knowing where, but Donghyuck held you back. The angel… kept saying ‘Come home’. And even now as Donghyuck holds onto his head, you wonder if he’s switching personalities from Sun to someone else… you hope it’s not Mr Zhong. So when he comes to a start you call: “Haechan?”

“How did you know it’s me? You still look so beautiful, my baby,” His teary eyes open and you smile holding onto his cheek. He holds onto your hand and kisses the inside of your palm. “You’re really here, I miss you so much, these past few days have been drowsy and lonely without you.”

“I don’t know how long I have until the dream is over, but I need your help Haechan,” You draw closer to him. “I know it’s going to be hard to believe, but ever since I’ve died… I’ve been here with you. Inside of your conscious…”

“You’ve been here? My conscious? That’s impossible.”

“Yes, every day I’ve been here. Close to you, hearing everything you’ve been doing. I fear that something is happening, they’re trying to make you forget me.” You nod your head trying to come clean. “I’ve been with a guy called Mr Zhong, and he keeps wanting me to get out of here. He’s in the Core-”

“Wait wait wait what?” He backs up-  “You had her all this time?” By now you know he’s not talking to you but someone else… in his head, as he looks to the side looking confused. “What do you mean she’s lying? Then who the hell am I speaking to? She said-”

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

You’re jolted to the side and suddenly… You’re back in the dark room. “What?” You get off the bed and wonder what happened? You run to the door- almost falling over when it opens instantly. Mr Zhong.

“I could strangle you to death right now.” He huffs and fumes. Holding his hand out, you watch on object appear. “I’m bounding you in chains. Because I can’t trust you.” You’re surprised when he holds onto your hand and chains you to the bed. You plead in shock trying to pull away. He gets tape and places it over your lips. You watch him walk out the room before a pit of darkness is formed. Muffling your cries you can’t believe that this is happening again. How long will he trap you in here? It’s not fair.

The next day Donghyuck awakes from a confused dream, he remembers seeing you and hearing you. He saw you wanted to go to the light but he held you back pleading you to stay with him. He goes to work, it’s a FrIday so the day drags as he’s got no plans.

Meanwhile inside of him, there’s a full on search for you.

Sun begin to ‘take the wheel’ and run Donghyuck’s body, simply because Mr Zhong is in a meeting with Haechan. Thus, leaving Donghyuck to be run by Sun. Who is active tonight.

Donghyuck finds himself in a bar. Dimmed lights, bass so low, alcohol and pool tables being the only source of entertainment for the few loitering people inside the bar on the casual Friday night. Donghyuck is obviously here for the alcohol to drink and just forget... and slowly pass into tomorrow. He doesn’t want to wake up. If anything he wishes to dream about you again. He doesn’t want to feel anything. He just wants to be numb and drink… It’s what the Body wants anyway. The pain of crying for your death is too much… they just want to be numb.

“Hey,”

Donghyuck looks up to the bartender… It’s Jisung. Unlike the other days when Jisung’s face is upbeat and ready for a conversation, he looks down casted, and Donghyuck can guess why. “Hi.” He greets back lowly clearing his throat that sounded so clogged and choked from crying. “Can I get a row of shots.”

Jisung nods his head.

“Regular or-”

“No.” Donghyuck shakes his head. “I want something strong. Really, really strong.”

“Coming right up.” He’s tempted to go, but after hearing the news and seeing all over his social media about your death, he sticks around. “Sorry about your loss man,” He pipes up. He’d recall how you and Donghyuck used to be tight. You guys would often come to the bar to celebrate together… in a quiet space, laughing and giggling, getting tipsy and touching each other till you’d both go home and do just what he can imagine. You were a pleasure in Jisung’s low key bar. He enjoyed seeing a young couple be together for a long time and staying consistent to their ‘Friday night bar night’. Not only did he know he’d get money on that day, but he also knew you’d grace him with compliments about how fine he looks especially when you wanted to make your boyfriend a bit jealous. But now seeing Donghyuck here all on his own, looking like shit is a representation of how he must feel inside.

“It’s cool.” Donghyuck quickly discards. You were friendlier with Jisung then Donghyuck was. “Can I just have my shots?”

But Jisung is in a caring mood tonight and opts for a conversation instead. “You know, I lost a friend of mine once, and I realized that drinking my pain away wouldn’t do much, so I-”

‘Why the fuck is he not giving me my drinks?’ Sun complains looking at the screen of Donghyuck’s eyes. ‘Ask him again.’

Donghyuck interrupts Jisung. “Look man, tonight’s just not one of those nights. I just want to drink.”

“Truth be told, you actually look like you need a chat. And all I’m saying is that I’m all ears-”

“Thanks for the offer, I’ll take it into consideration.” Donghyuck tightly smiles with no emotions in his eyes. “But may I please just have my drinks.”

Jisung takes the hint when seeing Donghyuck’s cold gaze. “Ayt, but just so you know-”

Banging the table furious and abruptly standing up Donghyuck grabs Jisung by the collars staring at him deadly in the eye. “I just want a fucking drink.” Grating his teeth, Donghyuck tosses Jisung back, leaving the poor guy startled by what just happened.

“Alright shit. I’ll get you your damn drinks.” Jisung stares shocked and eyes still in a daze. “Just calm the fuck down before you get beat the fuck up.” Jisung turns around still with an upset gaze as he fixes up the drinks.

“You know what,” Donghyuck doesn’t finish his sentence as he gets up and heads out. You weren’t here anymore it would be pointless to carry on the tradition without you. He’s just gonna go to the club.

-

“Come with me.” Is the first thing Mr Zhong says when opening up the door. He unchains you just by opening up the palm of his hand.

“Where?”

He ignores you and carries on walking. Trying to show him that you’re angry is pointless as he doesn’t even pay mind to your face. He steps in the elevator and you’re next to him before the doors close and suddenly you’re in a dimly lit place.

“I must warn you.” Mr Zhong speaks as he steps out. “The Mind’s layout isn’t as civil as the upper Core or Cyber Dream.” Mr Zhong places his hand on the handle of a door that reads ‘MIND’ and grips it tightly. “Stay by me at all times. And please, do not touch anything. That’s a warning.”

“I won’t.” You grumpily say, as realization dawns on you that you’re going to the Mind. Walking behind Mr Zhong at all times, you tremble with every step, as the floors shake. “Why’s the floor shaking so much?” You question and stand still when you feel another heavy tremor.

Mr Zhong sighs. “That’s not the Mind for sure, the Body is partying or something.”

“Partying?” You go on. “You could’ve just used your elevator.”

“Unfortunately here I can’t use much of my power, because this isn’t my domain or territory.” Mr Zhong fills you in. “When we’re in the Upper part of Donghyuck’s body, I’m in control. But from the neck downwards, this is the Body and Mind’s layers.”

Still following behind Mr Zhong, you take in all the aspects of the Mind, which is a literal bloody sight. The walls are hollow red with veins gauging out from time to time and blood being spilled before a few ‘workers’ in red… just with empty faces quickly come and clean up. Everywhere is red, veiny and just so flesh like. The deeper you go, the darker it gets. Maroon and smelling like his natural scent. Right now you feel so close to him even though you can’t see him. There’s a door that says ‘heart’ and you furrow your brows.

“Are we going in there?”

“You’re about to head into Donghyuck’s heart. Literally.” Mr Zhong is about to speak, but the space and area around gets darker then usual, not even the maroon bloody lights can light up the way to the door. “We have to hurry, the Body is doing things that I hate again.”

“Such as?”

“Drinking. I don’t know if you recall but Donghyuck once exposed to alcohol, large portions of it, he does crazy things.” You get a flash of Donghyuck drinking and you recall just how wild he was. Mr Zhong mumbles finally getting to the door. “A damn alcoholic.”

Just from opening up the door, you feel this deflated downing energy, everything is lifeless and your ears are exposed to weeping. You swear that’s one of the common sounds you’ve been hearing from Donghyuck. He’s just been a crying mess. Instantly you feel emotional and your eyes water up as well. Why’d you have to leave him all alone? The room is still dark but every once in a while it flashes a little maroon and then you’re able to take in the view. Just like the upper Core room, it’s spacious but instead of multiple little Donghyuck’s running around, there’s only one person seated behind a desk looking at screens. When you look at the screen you see dimed videos of your face, your lips, your laugh and how the specific moments shown on the screen remind you of special times you’ve had with Donghyuck.

Whether it’s holding hands and just looking up to him with innocent eyes. Or your muted talking as you smile at him. Haechan, The Mind seems to be watching it all.

There’s one where you’ve just won the scrabble competition (in which you represented your university) and you jump up high cheering on as the crowd around and your teammates also join in on the celebration. You can see Donghyuck from his eyes point of view running towards you yelling out in pure ecstasy and joy! Once he gets to you, he lifts you up so high that you begin laughing, and when he brings you back down, your lips and his merge and he holds you so tight. You recall how the week before you were so stressed that you deprived him of any kisses, of any attention just so that you could study and prepare for the competition. So to watch it again, brings a memory to your head of how thrilled Donghyuck was on your behalf.

Another video that plays on the screen in how you’re sitting on his lap as he plays video games. You’re on your phone texting your friend while he’s immersed into the game and talking to his friends over the microphone. It was just calm and simple, and then out of nowhere he kissed your cheek. “I love you, you know that right?”

“I know,” You smiled at him placing a kiss over his lips. “I love you too,”

One video captures your attention the most. It’s just your face as you’re sleeping. The room is a bit dark, but from Donghyuck’s eyes he can see you. He leans close and kisses your forehead. You hum out with a little chuckle.

“Babe just sleep,”

“I can’t,” he whispers, and you can tell he’s smiling. You can’t remember this at all, but just watching how pure everything looks as he draws closer to you and wraps his arms around you. Moaning and continuously pampering your face with kisses. “This is the first time you’re sleeping here in my room, and I’m just realizing how perfect you are for me,”

“Hyuck, sleep,” You giggle. “You’re pussy drunk,” you mumble but still accept his kisses on your face.

You can hear him laughing… “You were so good tonight,” he whispers. You smile to yourself, in faint remembrance, it’s the first time you made love to him. You were flattered the entire night, and he was submissively dominant with you and at the end, he couldn’t stop admiring and praising you. “I can’t believe how good you were,”

There’s a long pause of silence. “My parents would’ve killed you,”

“Why?”

“We had sex before marriage,” you mutter out. Donghyuck looks down to how your arms wrap around him and you get closer to his body. “I don’t think they’d approve,”

Donghyuck is silent for a really long time before he finally speaks. “The purpose of marriage, to my understanding as you’ve said before, is for emotional commitment. We’ve been together for like 4 years now. If we weren’t in love at that moment, then it was just going to be sex. But right now, tell me what you feel? Was it just sex?”

Donghyuck looks down to you as you look up to him with a little smile. You shake your head. “It wasn’t just sex because I felt safe. As in, I wasn’t scared to give you my whole body, my whole mind… my everything. I’m not scared or anything, because I know that you’re my lover, and I will always be there for you. The same way you’ll be there for me, right?” Your eyes look so hopeful.

“You have no idea how much, I just want to spend the rest of my life with you,” Donghyuck smiles kissing your lips as you kiss his again.

“I feel like I don’t want this night to end,” You lay your head on his chest and Donghyuck’s fingers play with your back and your head.

“Same here,” he mumbles. “So let’s make it official,”

That gets you to turn your head and rest your chin on his chest. “What are you saying Hyuck?” You laugh a little. “That was just so sudden,”

“You’re so beautiful like this,” he giggles, running his hand over your hair and down your face. “I’m saying we make it official. Courtship. Let’s just spend the rest of these months seeing what marriage would be like, and if you like, I’ll buy you a ring,”

You squint your eyes at him with a playful smile. “Dude, are you serious?” You laugh. “Is this like a proposal or something?”

“I mean, I can’t get on my knee now and propose can I?”

“Donghyuck,” You can’t stop smiling as you watch him get up. You too get up as you wrap the blanket over your boobs. Donghyuck sits up and reaches down into his pants. Your eyes enlarge when he gets out a ring. Thankfully, as you remember, it’s his own ring. “For a second there, I thought that was a real ring.”

“But then again, wouldn’t you want me to propose in a grand dramatic way?” He chuckles as he holds his hand out. You place yours on his hand and he kisses it looking at you. “Here’s my ring, this will be my commitment to you.”

“So much for a purity ring,” You giggle as you watch him place the ring on your index finger.

“It can still be a purity ring,” He pats your chin. “Just with a different meaning. We’ll wait again,”

“Hyuck this is huge,” You whisper, blushing and looking at the ring. “I don’t know if I’m saying yes because I’m dick drunk, or if I really want to,”

“That’s why I said, we’ll wait,” He lays back down, just as you follow him. You’re just giggling as you lay your head on his chest.

“Hyuck you’re crazy, right now you’re just crazy,” You’re laughing as you look up to him. “I’m just as crazy,”

“Crazy people get divorced even after promising each other that they wouldn’t.” Donghyuck says. “I don’t plan on making a commitment I can’t keep. Especially when it involves you babe,”

“Same here,” You whisper out. “I guess, till death do us apart,”

“Never,” Donghyuck shakes his head. “My love for you goes beyond that. Even in the next life, if there is one. I just want to keep loving you… and only you. No one else. I’d probably not be able to move on,”

Mr Zhong hears that, and he can remember that the Upper Core wasn’t in control that night, neither was the Body. The one in control was the Mind, Haechan. Mr Zhong reminiscences just how he was that night when Donghyuck was mindlessly pouring out his heart. Mr Zhong knew that his friend loved you so much, but hearing this confession, these were the Mind’s thoughts. He never knew it ran this deep. He thought it was just a physical attraction to you. That the Body, Sun, loved your body and was finally happy to have sex with someone. Mr Zhong didn’t know that the one in control of these recurring feelings was the Mind. It just explains how precious you are to Donghyuck as a whole. It also just goes to show how far Haechan was willing to go if he gave you a ‘purity’ ring. Mr Zhong turns to you, and you’re a crying mess. You’re crying silently and he can only guess that Haechan too is crying silently while watching this. He sighs. He already got in so much trouble for hiding you. There was no way now that Haechan would release you.

Your voice catches Haechan and he instantly presses pause on the video snapping his head back. Of course his teary eyes are red from mourning you, but when he sees you and Mr Zhong, his posture immediately straightens and he tries to act cool. “You’re here.” He clears his throat. “I was just…”

“Haechan.” Mr Zhong moves forwar-

“Were you really going to marry me?” You ask.

Haechan’s eye instantly go over to you. Your face still so real and beautiful. He nods his head. His voice coming out lowly, afraid that you’ll be taken away just like all the other times. This time he takes in your presence and beauty… you’re here. “I wanted to, I still do,” he tilts his head to the side as you get swamped in his eyes. “You’re just as beautiful,”

Your heart swells with such pain, and you gulp looking down. “Mr Zhong,” You turn to Mr Zhong, pleadingly. Mr Zhong can tell where it’s going, and he doesn’t want you to go there in that direction so he looks away from you and continues talking to the Mind.

“Haechan.” He calls, bringing Haechan’s eyes away from you and to him. “Right now we’re in a dilem-”

The ground shakes tremendously and Mr Zhong holds onto the chair just as Haechan keeps his hands on the desk. You meanwhile sway with the violent shake. It happened again.

Mr Zhong sighs. “Haechan, you know how reckless Sun is when he’s in control. Please. I came here to just talk to you about Y/n and how you have to let her go.”

“Straight to the point.” Haechan scoffs and looks away. “After hiding her away from us you just want to bring her back and then take her away again. You’re so full of shit.”

“You know what will happen if she stays here longer. I know it’s hard to-” Mr Zhong quivers when another tremor erupts. Shit. Donghyuck is probably in a club or something, drinking badly and the body is allowing him to do whatever.

“You know what Mr Zhong. I’m not in a mood to talk to you.” Haechan starts and presses some buttons on the keyboard trying to see what’s going on out there. Unlike when the core loses control to the body, the mind can actually gain control back. But when seeing where Donghyuck is, Haechan shakes his head. In a club. With several bodies jumping and bumping into him. And to make it worse, Donghyuck is tipsy. How much did he drink? “You said we should have 2 weeks of grieving. I can grant you that. But I can’t let go of Y/n,”

“Haech-”

“Bro she’s here.” Haechan turns around snapping. “She’s literally here.” His voice pipes down. “She’s not just some imagination like I thought she was. I thought I was going crazy, but man, she’s here. Do you know I felt when Donghyuck was about to die when going down that mountain in speed… and then I saw and heard her voice? Do you know how shitty I felt when Jaemin accused me of killing her? Do you have any idea how worthless I’ve been feeling these past days just seeing myself in the mirror? But the mere thought of her… Mr Zhong… just thinking of her, I’d feel whole again. That night when I first felt her hand I didn’t know what to believe. But then I saw her. I stopped Donghyuck from ending it, because of her. I thought she was just a... a figment of his imagination. But she’s not. She’s real. She’s here. I just want to be here with her,”

“You’re gonna regret it.” Mr Zhong whispers out of your ear shot and he gets closer to Haechan. “Do you want her to become like me?”

That seems to get Haechan upset as he pushes on Mr Zhong’s chest. You can only wonder what’s happening as you see the anger cross over Haechan’s eyes. “She won’t become like you.”

“How sure are you?” Mr Zhong clinches his jaw. His eyes deadly and even a bit tearful. “How sure are you that she won’t be st-”

“Because I love her!” Haechan yells out. “And times are different. She’s here for a reason. And that’s what I’ll keep my mind to.”

“Haechan yo-” Another tremor causes Mr Zhong to screech out in annoyance. He needed to get out of here and try and gain control of Donghyuck again to get him out of the bar and go home… but now, he’s just really upset that Haechan doesn’t want to consider his thoughts. “Fuck. I can’t stand this. I already told you that this isn’t up for discussion. I’m doing everyone here a favor. Afer 2 weeks. I’ll make her leave. Let’s go.”

“Can I just stay here for little bit Mr Zhong,” You ask gently still looking at Haechan. When he looks at you too, simultaneously you can feel like there’s a literal connection.

“No you can’t stay here.”

“But-”

“I said let’s go.”

“Come to think of it.” Haechan speaks up with his eyes turning to a glare when looking at Mr Zhong. “You defiled me by going behind my back and assigning her to the Core. Who made you in charge of her?”

Mr Zhong sighs. “It’s the fact that I knew that if you knew, or rather if anyone else in this place knew that she was alive in, that you wouldn’t let her go. I was protecting her. From this.”

“You don’t have to protect her anymore. She’s got her own conscious. Her own mind.”

“Let’s go.” Mr Zhong turns his back and walks to the door not wanting to argue about this.

Your heart is beating fast, but when Haechan’s soft gaze turns to you, as if telling to do what you must, you feel safe being with him. “No.”

“No?” Mr Zhong turns around in stun and surprise. He stomps to you, but you’re quickly pulled back just as Haechan gets in front of you. “Haechan get out of my face.”

“She said no.” Haechan’s low voice is nothing to mess with as he sounds threatening. “Last I checked. You’re in my territory. You’ve got no power here. So leave. Before I make you.”

“Haechan.”

“Mr Zhong.” Haechan calls firmly.  You peek from behind Haechan, and Haechan can feel just how your tiny fingers gently come up on his sides. He misses this. He misses this feeling. “I said leave.”

Mr Zhong clinches his jaw. He strides out with so much anger in him. When the door closes, there’s another tremor that makes itself known. But you hold tighter onto Haechan as his hands stretch out behind you making sure you’re steady.

Haechan’s fingers over you, and yours on his sides makes you feel good.

Even though you’ve always been around the others who look like Donghyuck, being alone right now with Haechan feels equivalent to being with Donghyuck. You just want to see his face. You want to feel him. To just…

“I just want you to be alive,” Haechan steals the words from your lips, as he whispers it to you. Still not being able to look at your face. He’s finally alone with you, but it feels so sacred.

“But I’m here,” you mutter and peek your head on his shoulder looking into his eyes. “It’s you that’s not here,”

“I am though,” That gets him to slowly turn around and longingly tilt his head down. “I’m the realist thing to Donghyuck. His spirit,” Haechan’s eyes that were clear are now glassy. You’re so real… He can’t believe you’re here. “But Mr Zhong is right,” He sniffs surprisingly himself when saying that. It feels good to have you this real in front of him. “You can’t stay here,” But he doesn’t want to ruin things.

“Why?” You shake your head, your arms still being around him as your eyes search all over his own. “Why can’t I be here with you, isn’t this better than actually being dead?”

“Is it,” He runs his hands down your face. “It fucking is.”

Once Mr Zhong gets to the Upper core room, he’s stunned when looking at the screen and seeing Donghyuck making out with some random woman... “You’ve gotta be shitting me. What the hell is the Body doing?”

But also down at the Body, Sun is surprised by the sudden kiss that Donghyuck gives to a random lady. Of course the lady is confused at first but then she gives into the kiss and has her arms around him. “That’s not us. Who’s in control right now?”

Haechan picks you up by your waist, as you wrap your legs around him. “I just want you so bad right now,”

“Have me all you want,” You’re breathless when kissing Haechan back equally as hard and longingly.

All the way in the control centers, Sun tries to stop the action of Donghyuck getting down on a girl. Mr Zhong watches as Donghyuck is hooked to the girl he’s making out with- it’s getting pretty strong as instantly Donghyuck’s hormones act as an edge for him to feel needy and lustful. And thus, the Core’s lights slowly begin to shut down… allowing the body to have full control of the erotic moment.

“We’re supposed to be grieving, what the hell.” Mr Zhong walks away, not wanting to feel any part of these emotions.

Sun in the Body center feels the heat just from the simple kiss turning to French, but he too wonders who’s in control of the heavy, needy, lustfully intention. He watches as the familiar lights turn dim showing that the body is not in control. Although he watches, he’s quite upset that it’s not Y/n that Donghyuck is kissing.

However for Haechan who’s full on hands with you, doesn’t notice the bright light shining within the mind, showing that he’s now in full control.

Donghyuck has no time to think, he’s thoughts are clouded by the steamy make out session that he has with the lady. They move from the dance floors to the public toilet, barely even walking straight and moving in a tipsy needy way to one of the stalls, Donghyuck’s morals are forsaken when he takes the girl in a seemingly loving passionate way. As he’s drunk it’s difficult for him to control or focus, but one thing he knows is that for some reason in this moment… he feels closer to you. You’re here with him. He can strongly feel that. Even though the little part in his core knows it’s not you, he still feels your strong presence.

Haechan places you on a table in another section of his own control center, your lips not leaving his once just as he unfastens his band and pulls down his pants till his waist. You pull your skirt up and remove your underwear, Haechan gently places his tip in between your wet folds before breaking the kiss and taking a peek at you. Your cheeks are a shade pink and you nervously smile. “Do you trust me?”

“Always,” Your heart beat syncs again as he keeps his grip on your waist, with his other hand on his member as it strokes over your wet folds. It’s the fact that he was your first and you’ve only done it once with him, but you still feel so cautious and nervous. Being here with him in... inside of Donghyuck, you still feel so much love and passion oozing out of him, and all the emotions are washed into you. When he pushes more into you, you arch your back and hold him closer.

“Hyuck,”

Donghyuck hears the soft whimper in his head, he hears your soft yelp and it only causes him to pull the random girl closer to him. His lips find hers, envisioning it as ‘yours’- but even though he envisions it – he still feels strongly close to you. Haechan takes control allowing you to feel much more comfortable as he moves a bit quicker. Donghyuck feels so much pleasure as he pounds harder and faster making love to you- even though he’s with a random person.

Even when he locks eyes with her all he can see in his head is you. He can hear you, he can feel you. He doesn’t know how, but feeling so close to you in this moment allows him to hold you close. Mr Zhong tries to block out the protruding thoughts that Donghyuck thinks over and over again. The moaning, the love making-

His eyes slowly enlarge… “The body is not in control right now… because Donghyuck’s drunk… that means… Haechan’s having sex with Y/n.” Mr Zhong cuss when realizing that disobeyed him and that you’re probably touching Haechan right now. “What’s wrong with this girl?” He gets up from his chair quickly using his elevator to go down to The Mind. Once the elevator door opens up, he speed walks along the long bloody corridor trying to reach to Haechan’s center quickly.

The random girl’s legs grip Donghyuck’s waist closer to her as he pounds harder and faster, getting sloppier each time she squirts. He’s weak, he can feel an overwhelming amount of pleasure. His eyes are tightly shut kissing the girl’s face off. But then-

All of a sudden he feels like he’s getting slapped. A sharp slap gets him falling out of the girl and on the floor.

“Oh- are you okay?” The girl asks slightly frustrated that she was close before pulled out suddenly, heavily panting, her legs shaking begging for more. She uses her own fingers to finish off closing her eyes angling her head upwards.

Donghyuck however is still in a trance. Did someone just slap him? He blinks several times to get rid of being dizzy, but all he can see is his stiffly hard cock popping. He gets up holding onto the sink. He tries to calm himself off. It’s strange how suddenly, he’s no longer in the mood to get off. Stuffing his stiff manhood back in his drawer and getting his pants up, he looks up at the mirror- ignoring the girl who’s finishing off by herself. In the mirror he sees himself.

Tired. Drained.

He calls your name silently when thinking back to what he saw and heard in his head. It’s like you where there with him. He could feel you, literally feel you. Woozily moving to the side, he watches the girl squeal out before another stream of cum leaves her throbbing pink pussy. It doesn’t turn him on, it only makes him feel sad, especially when the girl’s face is revealed. Its not you. He steps back, finding himself out of the toilet and eventually drunkenly passing by the crowd trying to get himself to go out.

The fast pace emotions and mind wondering what’s going on inside of him- he stops once he’s outside the club and hurls out on the ground. Some passers pull gross faces moving away from him, the bouncer of the club groans and grabs a handful of Donghyuck’s shirt before violently tossing him further away from the club doors. Donghyuck hits his head and suddenly he’s out of conscious.

“Hyuck,”

“Mh?”

“Hyuck wake up,”

“Hm?”

Donghyuck’s head is buzzing when hearing something… your voice. He jolts up instantly when pairing it to your voice, but… you’re nowhere in sight. Left and right he turns his head before wincing and holding onto his stomach. He notices that he’s somehow by your family old home, by the graveyard… wait… how did he get here?

Minutes before….

“No!” Mr Zhong grabs your hand forcing you out of Haechan’s grip. “No more!”

“Why the hell do you want me gone so bad!” You screech pulling your hand violently away from him just as he shuts the door to lock Haechan away and his elevator comes. “Why can’t I just be happy with Donghyuck-”

“Look around! This isn’t the fucking real world anymore.” Mr Zhong motions around when suddenly the elevator reaches the Upper Core room. Of course some core members are surprised when seeing you, but now, even though Donghyuck/Sun is drunk, it’s no secret that you’ve been inside of him for a long time. “You’re trapped here! The longer you fool around here, the harder it’ll be for you to get out-”

“And what if I don’t want to go out! What if I want to be here, inside of him!” Your eyes water up. “What if I don’t want to go- he buried my body ready to leave me behind… what if I’m afraid of leaving him, of leaving everything behind- of just… of just dying.” Weakly your legs give out as you fall to the ground when he tosses you in his dark room.

He’s about to close the door on you but you shed some tears saying something that has him frozen in spot. “I don’t want to go Mr Zhong. I don’t want to leave everything behind. I’m not ready to die. I don’t want to leave Donghyuck. I love him. I don’t want to go. I don’t want to die. I just want to love him… I just want him. I want my life back… I want him so much.”

Mr Zhong watches you on the floor balling your eyes out. The realization coming again that you’re dead and that really you have left the world. Silently he takes a seat on the ground allowing you your moment to grieve. He knows it’s hard. He knows what you’re feeling. He knows it all. He understands your tears and pain, it’s why he tries to cool himself down to speak to you more calmly.

“I’m going to tell you a little story.” He speaks in a whispering tone. “And if this doesn’t change your mind, I promise you I’ll stop trying to get you out of here.” He gulps. “If this story doesn’t change your mind, you’ll be stuck in here… with me. Like me. You’ll have Donghyuck, but it’s not as luxurious as it seems.”

You quietly exhale listening to him as that gets your attention. You look at him seated across from you. Even though darkness is second nature, you can still see him. And by his words, you already prepare yourself to stay with Donghyuck… Haechan and Sun, because there is nothing that he will say that will make you want to leave. You just can’t wait to stay with Haechan.

“Donghyuck was only 9 years old when this happened. He met a boy. An 8 year old boy. A foreign exchange student who moved from China to Korea. Donghyuck and the boy instantly clicked despite the language barrier. They clicked in such a way that the young boy’s parents were relieved that their son had made a friend. Donghyuck taught the boy how to speak and was just of much help to the young boy whenever. The boy’s parents loved Donghyuck. So it was only natural that Donghyuck and the young boy ended up becoming best friends who did everything together.”

Your ears are attentive when listening to this story. You’re hooked, not because of the young 9 year old Donghyuck, but because of how Mr Zhong speaks. This is almost the first time he’s looking vulnerable.

“One day they were walking home for school… and came across a junkyard. Curiously they snuck inside the forbidden territory and began exploring. They discovered so many new things and even took some souvenirs.” Mr Zhong chuckles faintly. “The young boy suggested playing a game before they left. Hide and seek. They played that game back and forth in the junkyard,” Mr Zhong’s face slowly scrunches in confusion. “They played 4 games before it was Donghyuck’s turn again. Donghyuck…”

You look up when Mr Zhong stops speaking. You’re surprised to see him with one hand tightly over his mouth as his own eyes are glistening and look moist. You don’t speak, watching him stay quiet. He regains composure again and removes his hand from his face.

“The young boy hid in a freezer. It was broken of course, so he felt safe getting inside of it. In his hiding position from time to time he would open the top and peek his head out. He laughed when he could see Donghyuck getting confused… it’s through the little laughs and giggles that Donghyuck spotted him. He was busted… but then… Something happened.” Mr Zhong licks his dry lips as he stares into the void. “The young boy watched Donghyuck getting approached by some guy in uniform. The guy said something that made Donghyuck nervously turn and began heading in the direction of the exit. For some reason Donghyuck left. The young boy was too afraid to step out of the freezer just in case the man would yell and shout. He waited for a really long time. Because now there wasn’t just one man, but they were many men walking around the junkyard. The boy was getting scared. He just thought that if he sat inside quietly, that when those men would go away he’d quickly sneak out and run. Unfortunately for him, those men stayed for hours on end. They were construction site workers. So, they were working. He began losing hope but then- the freezer top lip opened. He thought that he was caught… thankfully it was just Donghyuck. Donghyuck looked nervous and scared but he assured the boy to quickly climb out. The boy tried climbing out… and he… he…” Mr Zhong stops and turns to the floor, he sniffs.

You don’t know what has the most of your attention now. Perhaps it’s the story, maybe the expression Mr Zhong uses, or it could be that… that little boy was Mr Zhong…

“I can’t remember well what happened from there, but I know for some reason, Donghyuck was knocked over and fell to the ground when a sudden… claw came from the sky… and… picked up the freezer. The young boy was tossed back inside freezer… Chugged around as if he was in a washing machine.” Mr Zhong bites his lip. “He tried getting up to get out. But he was struggling to lift the lid up… It… the freezer was being lifted up and then from such a high feet it dropped to the bottom… causing the freezer door to creak a little. But… the boy was already injured. He still tried to lift the lid up with one arm. He saw that he was on a moving platform. He needed to get out fast. It was already too late… the boy died a slow painful death… however his spirit did not die… it was called back.”

“Mr Zhong?” You call out sadly as you watch him shiver.

“Donghyuck ran home. He ran home and… shut himself in his room.” Mr Zhong’s eyes stay closed. “The young boy’s parents came over, they were anxious worried and crying… they asked if Donghyuck had seen him, and Donghyuck… he lied. He said, he hadn’t. The parents filed a missing case report. That whole week was a nightmare… Every day when Donghyuck would go to the school, he’d see the boy’s mother standing outside the gate with a poster of her missing son. She’d desperately ask the other kids if they’d seen him. But no one had. Donghyuck… felt guilty. From time to time he went to the junkyard to search for the young boy. Donghyuck was… traumatized. Guilt ate him from the inside… he refused to move on without finding the body… because by now he already knew that the young boy was dead.”

“Mr Zhong…” you cup your mouth.

“Donghyuck refused to move on. He was scared that he had killed someone else’s son. But something crazy happened. He prayed to find the boy.” Mr Zhong opens his eyes. “The boy was dead, but somehow, he was still inside of him. Donghyuck began hearing voices in his head. He’d see images of the little boy… they’d talk together in his room. Although physically the boy wasn’t there, Donghyuck saw this kid with his own naked eyes in the spiritual world. The little boy too… he didn’t know what was going on but he just wanted to go home to his parents… he wanted to leave Donghyuck’s mind, but Donghyuck insisted that he’d find a way out for the boy. It was comforting at first… but as days turned to weeks, and weeks turned to months, the little boy began getting sucked into a personality that wasn’t his. He wanted to leave, but Donghyuck didn’t want to let him go. Donghyuck promised the boy that he’d find a way out for him… so that he could live again. I think that’s why the little boy stayed… he thought he could live again- he ignored all the doors that opened up to try and help him to leave and instead he stayed in Donghyuck. Being inside of Donghyuck, had him feeling that he was still alive and that he could come back alive. If only they could find his body then they could make him come alive.”

There’s a moment of silence as your eyes water… could this little boy be… You’re completely speechless as you listen to Mr Zhong…

“Of course this brought attention to Donghyuck as his own parents saw how the death affected their son… they watched Donghyuck talk to himself about a way to escape… they saw their son obsessed with talking to ghosts and wanting them to come alive… so… they had him hypnotized.” Mr Zhong looks to his own hands. “Hypnotized to forget the little boy. A so called solution to make him stop seeing things. And it worked. They didn’t help him move on, or even help the little boy trapped to get out. No. They just erased the little kid from his head. And so, the next morning, when the boy woke up and tried to speak to Donghyuck. Donghyuck never heard a thing. It began getting scary, as the only way out was shut completely. The little boy slowly became lonely as his own best friend… forgot him. Do you know how many years went by? Do you know how lonely it got when his own friend grew a conscious and couldn’t even recognize him? Do you know how terrifying it got to wake up in the same place every day being forced to forget who he was? He hadn’t seen his family in so long? Everything the little boy loved, he couldn’t properly because he was now forced to become someone else. He missed touch, tasting? Seeing and living with his own eyes and life. Do you know what it means to give up your life for someone else? Do you know just the amount of endurance the boy had to go through, adjusting to the fact that he was now forced to live as someone else? That little boy has been alone for more than 22 years and it may seem fantastic to spend your life trapped inside of someone, but you’ll begin to feel the effects when the person you’re in doesn’t even know who you are.”

You shake your head. “Mr Zhong, I don’t get this. What does this have to do with me? I hate to be inconsiderate, but it’s not like they hypnotized him to forget about me.”

Mr Zhong nods his head. “True. My best friend was hypnotized to forget me. So of course that doesn’t affect you. It was pointless telling you that story, I should’ve just skipped straight to the point.” You had a feeling he was telling the story about himself… but hearing him actually confessing to the name has you sinking in sadness. Until he opens his mouth… “I stayed here because Donghyuck refused to confess what he’d done to me. My soul has become restless. Rest less spirits don’t go to their resting place. No, they stay here until the person who killed them, confesses to either moving on, or admitting what they had done.”

Your heart sinks… drops to the ground. What did he just say? “Restless spirit?”

“Why do you think you’re in here?

“I didn’t mean to be insensitive Mr Zhong… but this isn’t funny. What you’re saying is scary…”

“I asked you why you think you’re here?” He ignores you and continues. “Donghyuck may have not been the one who ran you over, but he… did do something. He refuses to let you go. He wants you to haunt him until he’s dead. Just wait and see how he’ll be so obsessed with spending so much time in his ‘head’ with you that in the outside world they deem him crazy. Watch as friends begin to see him as strange because he doesn’t want to break the bond he has with you, watch as your brothers get annoyed that he keeps using your name in vain, watch as his perfectly normal life spirals into only wanting to focus on you. Just watch and see how the only answer that will make sense to him is death. Suicide. Watch as you see him paying all his attention on you and neglecting that he really has a life.”

Hearing that, it doesn’t sound as bad… “That doesn’t sound as bad.”

Mr Zhong shakes his head. It’s like you’re okay with being trapped here. It’s like you’re okay with letting Donghyuck not have a life anymore as he focuses on you. You’re okay with letting him not move on from you, to try and find another kind of happiness. You’re okay with making him numb to reality and float by like a ghost. You’re selfishly okay with him not moving on. By allowing Donghyuck to self-destruct. You’re selfish.

Mr Zhong gets up and shakes his head. “The dark truth about death, is that you end up losing everything and everyone you love. Once you’re dead it’s over. No second chances. One thing that I’ve learnt while being here, is that you either help the person to move on, or you haunt them with your presence, adding a cloud over their head. Weighing them down as they live with unsaid and unspoken confessions. So as you embark on this journey, I’m begging you don’t be the downfall of Donghyuck.”

The truth is, Mr Zhong never forgave Donghyuck for what he did to him. He never forgave Donghyuck for ending his life. Even though it wasn’t Donghyuck who killed him, Donghyuck could’ve said something, confessed of where Mr Zhong last was. Could’ve said… sorry.

When Mr Zhong woke up inside of Donghyuck he had the option to leave peacefully, or try to use Donghyuck’s body to shout and confess to the world. But unfortunately for him, his greed to be noticed inside of Donghyuck costed him his eternity and made him unknown. The bitterness inside of Mr Zhong transferred to Donghyuck, and added the personality and the greed and need to poses everything and anything. Maybe it’s why Donghyuck is just so obsessed over you like that. He miscalculated and ended up getting stuck inside of Donghyuck. Mr Zhong was forgotten. And maybe you won’t be forgotten, but surely, your selfish tendencies would manifest in Donhyuck one way or another.

What no one tells you about death, is that if you don’t learn to let go, you’ll never let go. You’ll never achieve a sense of control over yourself again. And unfortunately, that’s Donghyuck’s new path…

“I’m sorry Donghyuck.” Mr Zhong suddenly says. Tonight, he decided that he’d come up to the surface… because he didn’t want to be with you in his room. So instead being here in Donghyuck’s room, as Donghyuck sits idly on his bed is better. “I’m sorry.” Mr Zhong confesses again. “I blamed you all these years when really it was me that needed to let go. I hardened my heart because I was angry. My anger cost me my freedom. I’m so sorry for blaming you. It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t kill me. You were just as scared. You were a little boy, what was I expecting from you… I’m sorry.” Mr Zhong is surprised when he blinks and a tear drops from his eye.

He’s even more shocked when he feels a gnawing stare. Turning to the side, he sees Donghyuck’s enlarged beaded eyes on him…

Maybe you’re close by and Donghyuck’s just zoning out again. No. Mr Zhong turns back and when seeing no one he looks back to Donghyuck… Is he looking at him?

“Ch- Chenle?” Donghyuck chokes a little in surprise. “Is that really you?”

Mr Zhong feels his whole heart cave in when hearing his name. He momentarily freezes as he pays attention to Donghyuck. Donghyuck without haste instantly wraps his arms around Chenle crying out. Mr Zhong is surprised when Donghyuck doesn’t fall over. He’s even more surprised when… feeling comes back over his being. He can… feel again? “Donghyuck?”

“Chenle.” The reuniting is somber as both guys cry into each other’s arms. Donghyuck because inside of him… he recognizes Chenle… the friend he once had who disappeared.

“I’m not as selfish as you think I am.”

Mr Zhong doesn’t let go of Donghyuck but he does hear your voice. He opens his eyes and sees you behind Donghyuck.

“I thought long and hard about what you said.” You watch Donghyuck shiver and shed and break down whilist hugging Chenle… “You’ve got such a nice name.”

“But… how did you do it?” Mr Zhong asks. “How did you do this?”

“How did I do what?” Donghyuck asks. Making you slightly chuckle. Donghyuck shakes his head. “All this time… how did I forget about you? Were you really lonely? You never went to heaven to see your parents? I’m sorry man. I’m sorry for leaving you alone.”

Mr Zhong can’t comprehend the feelings he’s feeling. It’s just so sudden. All this time he couldn’t feel anything, for more than years he couldn’t feel anything, but now he can feel. Breaking away from Donghyuck he notices that instead of wearing black clothes… he’s also wearing white… and also he’s back to his… younger self. Which only strikes Donghyuck again.

“You said I had to let him go, and a part of me didn’t want to do that. But then… with the help of Haechan, we digged deep and looked into his memories… and then I saw you. A small boy who died all too soon and quick.” You confess. “You’re right we only have one life. And I can’t be selfish to steal someone else’s life. The more I thought about it, the more I thought about Donghyuck… I cried. He has carried so much loss, so much pain in him. Looking into his memories, I saw him hiding away and not being himself because he felt like an outcast. He doubted himself so much that he found it better to find pleasure in letting someone carry his pain… in not being himself. That hurt me, because I had many opportunities to be myself… But he shielded himself. I would just want him to be free and not be controlled by me. To be himself. To be free of pain and carrying so many things inside of him. So now I’m ready,”

Donghyuck’s ears hear that and he turns around, surprised to also see you. “You’re ready to do what?”

“To let you go,” You say sadly as you smile gently to him. “How about you Chenle?”

“I’m ready too. I’m ready to forgive you, and letting you go.” He gulps feeling so many emotions all relating to joy and a bitter sweet sadness.

“You’re both going to leave me?” Donghyuck turns to you both… especially when a bright light presents itself right in the middle of his room. “No. Please don’t go.” He cries… and you can hear Haechan… just as much as Sun. “How do I live? How do I breathe? I’ll suffocate without you,”

“No you won’t. You’ll find peace, joy and the same way your drowned in love into me, you’ll be able to do that again with yourself and with someone else.” You hold onto his cheek. “I need you to live Hyuck. I need you to let me go and live. Be happy with yourself. Confess and be free. Me dying isn’t the end of the world, it’s the start of a new future. For both of us.”

“But what if I don’t want to be free? I just want you,” He holds onto both your hands, surprised at how warm they are feeling.

Come home… You hear… and this time, Mr Zhong can hear it too. It’s the angel calling you guys over to the other side.

“I want you too, but we both can’t have what we want.” You gulp. “Instead we can cherish what we had and move on. I’ll always be with you, Hyuck,” you try to say while maintaining your own tears.

“Please,” He cries. “Don’t leave me.”

“Come on buddy,” This time Mr Zhong speaks with a warm smile. You’re so happy to see him smile. For the longest of time, he has only had a terrible frown on his face, so to see a smile you feel comforted that you’re not going alone. “You know we won’t leave if you ask us too, but I’m asking you to let us leave… I don’t want to make you heavy anymore. I want you to be light.”

Donghyuck thinks… he looks between you both and he can hear his heart breaking. But he knows it’s important. In his head… the thoughts coming, are the thoughts of how they died. He remembers seeing so much blood… he recalls seeing the life fade away from their eyes. At least they won’t suffer anymore… a tear rolls down his face, just as you hug him on the side and Chenle hugs him on the other side. He gulps. “Okay. Okay. I’m ready to… to… let you go…”

He doesn’t open his eyes but he feels so much warmth all around him. Slowly all the feelling around him becomes cold and he sighs out when opening his eyes in his dark room… Inside of him, Haechan and Sun run to the Upper Core trying to see if Mr Zhong would be there… and of course he’s not there. As they both cry, creating a crying feast of everyone crying, Donghyuck can’t stop balling his eyes out at losing both you and Chenle. Again

Meanwhile, donw by the ‘neck of birth’ a being is formed. In the exact same replica of Donghyuck… the next one to take over the core in Mr Zhong's old place. He wakes up with a name and aim.

Name: Hyuck. Assigned to: Core

“Hyuck. Please live.” He hears an echo serenade of your voice. “You must live and let go.”

That night, eventually when Donghyuck is able to sleep he dreams of doves and a serene peace washing over him.

Fin.

[bee-the-loser-recs]

~~~☼ My Jaehyun One-shot Fic Recs ☼~~

𖤓 Send in the clowns By @smileysuh 10.6k, Haechan|Mark|Jaehyun x reader, college au, frat boys NCT, best friend Jungwoo, friends to lovers, karaoke friends, smut, polyamory, slight fluff, Halloween parties, dressing up

𖤓 The V week spy By @smileysuh 20.1k, Jaehyun x reader (romantic) ft. Haechan | Yangyang | Jungwoo | Jeno, college au, frat house NCT, sorority member reader, stupid traditions, no strings attached situation, smut, slight fluff

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𖤓 Sugar 1 & 2 By @lattaeyongs 4k & 14k, CEO Jaehyun, secretary reader, they've been working together for 8 years, single dad Jaehyun, fluff, smut, slight angst, reader feels guilt about her job

[alreadyblondenow]

▸ Assassin Jaehyun x Assassin Female reader ▸ Smut, Smut, Smut, Fluff, Angst, Gore, MATURE ▸ JAEHYUN SMUT SERIES: FUCK, MARRY, KILL ▸ VOLUME I: PART 1, PART 2, PART 3 ▸ VOLUME II: PART 1, PART2

Summary: A new life without being an assassin. A chance to run away and forgive. A chance to do it all again and not fuck it up. How can Jaehyun protect you from his world now?

WORD COUNT: 7,000K

Warnings: THIS FIC IS FICTION ONLY, Smut, smut, smut, MATURE THEMES, Heavy description of killings because most of the characters are assassins, mentions of blood, character death, A LOT OF NCT MEMBERS WILL D WORD IN THIS FIC, unprotected sex, mentions of condoms, mentions of pill, pregnancy, swearing, mentions of alcohol. HEAVY CHEATING, FICTONAL MURDER, CAR CRASH, Not everything is proofread, apologies again. I hope I did not forget anything. PLEASE !!! DON'T READ IF IN ANY WAY YOU WILL BE UNCOMFORTABLE.

A/N: This is the fluffiest part of the series. The part 2 will have the gore and other shit heheheheheee. Thank you so much for waiting for Volume II ! I know how its so ugly to wait for an unfinished fic but I am doing my best huhu I'm sorry. I would like to mention that I changed the story, so if you read the teaser for FMK, I CHANGED THE PLOT A LOT SO - THANK YOU FOR YOUR UNDERSTANDING

If a person really loves you, they will have a hard time choosing whether to stay and fight for the relationship or just let you go because it's what you want. It’s between respect and what you want. 

Jaehyun wanted to lock you inside this apartment. He was planning to keep you like a thing that he loves for safe keeping. He wanted to make you stay, and not give you a choice anymore. He wanted to own you. He didn’t want to let you go. You’re not leaving his life. Not now. Not ever. 

That’s what Jaehyun wants. 

But Jaehyun loves you, that’s why he did not chose what he wanted to do. Jaehyun indeed loves you. You can see it in his eyes. Now that you’ve finally broke your silence and told him that you wanted to leave. And not just leave this place… you we’re talking about leaving his life. This life. For good. 

He was silent. He didn’t know what to say. But you can see in his eyes, he’s hurt. He even turned his back against you because he didn’t want you to see him cry. It’s not that this relationship grew out of love, but love was the problem all along. You and Jaehyun have this love for each other but life is doing it’s best to stop you two from pouring it. 

At this moment, Jaehyun is so frustrated, thinking about the time where it all started. Where did everything went down hill? 

Hendery? 

His father’s death? 

Mark’s death? 

“I know you’re deep into thinking right now” you disturbed his thoughts, sobbing, and struggling to speak for yourself but you have to. “But I have respect to you Jaehyun, until this very end, I need you to let go of me. Were tired of fighting, I can feel it. I’ll leave once you approved or accept that this is our end” you said and left the room. 

For Jaehyun hearing those words from you hurt. He wanted to hold you, stop you and grasp for every love that you have left for him. But he couldn’t. He was like a stone, he looked heartless on the outside for making you leave the room, but on the inside he was burning with want to make you stay. 

For three days, you waited patiently for his decision. And in those three days, Jaehyun was just gone. He wasn’t working, he didn’t attend any meetings, gone. Just gone. You packed your things as slowly as you can just so you could keep your calm composure.

And by the time he finally arrived, you knew that the day was today. You will finally leave and will be granted freedom. 

“I’m not going to try and win you back im not going to beg for you to stay. I want you to stay… but that’s not what you want “ 

He looked calm now you thought. He looked so tensed, mad and hurt the last time you were on the same room.

“But at least give me the chance to let you go properly in the way you deserved. Its the least I could do”

In the days he was gone, he did his best to think straight. He did his best to understand your part, why you want to leave and what good is this going to give you both? But to every question he asks himself, all answers just ends up putting you in good position. He can imagine you with a good life, perhaps leaving his life will give the peace he can’t give you. And besides… having a peaceful life was all you ever dreamed of. He has already become the villain in your life he can’t continue to do that.

You allowed him to help you pack.

You allowed him to drive you to your new place. 

You noticed he still wears his ring. 

You thought that this day would be awful, heavy and full of tears. But you can see right through Jaehyun that he made sure not to give you a hard time especially today.

“Hmm the place is small are you sure you dont want a bigger one?” You just gave him a look and shook your head no. 

Surprisingly Jaehyun looked like a normal person today. He still wears black though, all his tattoos are covered with thick clothing at least you get to see him like this one last time. Like a normal person. One without blood in his hands.

While you two were busy unloading your stuff, it was obvious that Jaehyun was taking his sweet time with you, he doesn’t normally move so slow like this, he even checked every inch of your new place and made sure you were safe. If you’re being honest… you’d kill to make time slower for this specific day. 

But after eating quietly at your empty living room floor, it snowed and the room became colder than it already is.

“Jaehyun I want to thank you for today,”he nods his head, looking at you straight in the eye while listening to every word you say, “You know where I live now. But please I hope you keep your word. Let me go” you just said that to avoid him spying on you. Who knows? 

He just nods.

“I hope you get to have warm nights now that I’m out of your life” Jaehyun said before finishing his beer.

“Im off now” He said with a cold tone. 

That night. You watched him get in his black car without even making a second look to you. He started driving the moment the car was ready to go. 

For almost 2 decades of being together. For the love you thought no one could ruin…. Everything went back to square one, on this cold and quiet day.

A year later 

Who would have thought that living a decent and innocent life would be something… so challenging. 

Challenging because now you realize killing someone just because you can… is not normal. It’s necessary and it can be avoided. 

You found a decent job at the library and youre a part timer at a convenience store… everything felt normal. You love it. Even if its boring.

“Well… you’ve been an assassin for far too long” Yuta laughs through the phone, “you should practice self reflection and do some meditating perhaps it could help you” Yuta suggests. 

“Hows Taeyong? Is the baking classes paying off?” You asked. 

“Yeah, surprisingly he bakes really good. But the guy is a perfectionist… nothing he makes make him happy” 

“Well tell him he’s doing a good job already” 

After that sweet call with your friend, you headed to your second job, a convenience store not too far from your place. It’s already 9PM, the person before your shift should be ready to head out. The job is kinda lonely, late hours can be so boring, but you figured its quiet. Plus you can eat peacefully, that’s what matters. Now that you’re alone,  eating peacefully with the food you made while looking at the window and watch the snow fall… 

You remember the night you and Jaehyun parted ways. You haven’t thought much about him. Youre lucky moving out goes hand in hand with moving on… but are you moved on officially?

Everyday, you come home and congratulate yourself for having a kind of life like this. A peaceful and quiet life. 

And everyday… you can’t help but think about sharing this kind of life with Jaehyun. Will he like it too? 

As you prepare to go to bed, it was a really cold night and you wanted to make sure you’re well rested by the morning comes. But just before you close your eyes, a loud bang at your gate woke every bit of you. 

You got a kitchen knife just to sure, funny how not being an assassin for a year can wake every instinct and skill you have with just a loud bang. 

By the time you open it, you were quick to point the knife to the person banging at your gate in this ungodly hour. 

It was Jaehyun. Covered in blood. 

He smiled before he could even speak a word and fell into your arms. Helplessly.

You carried him inside and took care of him. 

He lost a lot of blood already but you knew better, of course you can’t call the hospital or the police. “Fuck Jaehyun what am I supposed to do?” But you come your senses and just did whatever you can. 

You removed the bullets, stitched him up, cleaned him and made sure that he’s not in pain. Of course… he never removed his wedding ring.

When the sun came out, you went out to see his car and parked it inside. It was full of bullet holes and it seems like he really got lucky last night. 

He slept the whole day, it was already sunset when he woke up. He saw you sleeping beside him and didn’t even have second thoughts about hugging you even though every part of him hurt. 

“What the fuck happened?” You asked gently. 

He can clearly remember how you held a knife on his neck the night he arrived. He just smiled. “Still an assassin, you still got it” he teased you. 

“That was just for protection you idiot— answer me what happened” 

“Well, a business meeting did not end well, what’s new?” He smirked as if he didn’t just almost died. 

“You need hospital by the way… can I call someone to pick you up?” You asked with concern. 

“So eager to get rid of me huh?” 

“No Jaehyun. I don’t know how to keep you alive— please. Call someone” 

“But I like it here… I seriously thought that I’m gonna die last night, and all I could think about is seeing your face again. I’d die happily” 

That explains the smile before he collapsed. 

It’s hard to reason out with someone in this state, especially with Jaehyun. So you left him and prepared for dinner. But Jaehyun as the hard headed man he is, got up with all his strength to be with you in your small kitchen. 

“I shouldn’t be here” he said weakly. 

You walked towards him and hugged him gently, thankful that he is indeed alive. But you have to understand that you cant keep coming back to what hurt you. 

“Stay for dinner, we’ll figure this out” 

That night, you two talked like you didn’t you didn’t grew apart for a year. You were still the comfort that he longs for and he’s not ashamed to show it. While he was talking he didn’t hide anything from you for he was sure that you will never judge him. He admitted that he’s not in great shape, business is not well, drugs was all he had when you left, and that he was depressed. “My father left me with gold, money and a legacy… but not a happy life y/n” he scoffed and finished his meal. 

 When he was fetched by his new assassins, it was harder to leave than he thought. He feels sick, he never wanted to leave your place ever again, just like the night he left you here for the first time. The night he let you go.

“I bet you’re disappointed in me. I promised to never disturbed you but here I am…” he says with weak eyes.

“You can always visit me Jae… but not this way” you joked and kissed him on the cheek. 

Little did you know that your invitation made him happy, a push to be a better man again. He didn’t want to face you again like this, broken,  an addict, lost. He wanted to be better. And so he stepped into his car with hope, with motivation, a better drive to live a new life and bring back the mighty Jaehyun. 

Months passed by and you find yourself thinking about Jaehyun again. Waiting for a sudden visit, waiting for him again. Maybe it’s because you heard his story now? That he ruined himself because he lost you, it’s not your fault of course, you’re not responsible. It’s his own doing and free will! 

But when your waiting has finally come to an end, Jaehyun surprised you in an unexpected way. 

It was night time you just got home from a tiring shift and you barely can’t keep your eyes open while doing your dinner. When the doorbell rang, it woke you up in an instant because…. Who would visit you at this hour. You hid the kitchen knife behind you, as you open the gate with one hand. And there he is. Holding flowers in his arm while the other has a pizza box. 

“I bet you have a knife behind you” he chuckled and received a warm hug from you, welcoming him like he’s not a stranger to your life. 

He looked well, better than a few months ago. He told you he’s 3 months sober now, and that looking forward to see you is something that pushed him to do well. “Thank you” he said warmly. It wasn’t an easy battle, but he still loves you too much that he never wanted you to see him broken and lost.

The night was sweet, you didn’t expect to spend it so close with each other. Almost as if you two were still a happy couple. But that’s what forgiveness is all about. What happened in the past can’t be changed, but it happened already.

“You’re not mad at me anymore?” Jaehyun asks, why he’s slowly caressing your back while you lay on his chest comfortably like you’ve done it a thousand times. 

“About what exactly Jae?” you giggle, “About ruining our relationship? Your father’s death? all the betrayal, Mark’s death?” 

“Everything. Every little thing” he admits. 

“Ever since you set me free, I can’t help but think, ‘can Jaehyun live a life  like this? Peaceful and slow?’ I think about it everyday Jae. That’s how much I forgave you already”

Hearing your answer made him tighten his hug, as if he thanked you silently. As if telling you, he’s truly not worthy of your love but he will stay in your life. 

“You’re not just here for dinner, am I right?” The question shocked Jaehyun and caught him off guard. He didn’t expect that you’d see right through him. It’s not right to suddenly invite your ex lover (ex wife) to have sex after everything that’s happened in your life. 

You watch him become shy, ears red as fuck and dimples flashing before your eyes, “If somehow I put you in the mood” he answered shyly, but bravely, his hand still holding yours fondly “but nonetheless my intentions are good. I really wanted to see you again” he admitted. 

And as a prize for his cute honesty, you started kissing him softly. Testing waters. But of course, the man longs for you. He accepted those small kisses and returned some to you too. You feel his heart pounding against his chest, “nervous?” you teased him licking his lips before you proceeded and started to kiss him deeply. You feel his hands roam around your body, your night dress slightly lifted and your lacy panties, his tight pants are the only barriers that are stopping you two to fuck then and there.

“we shouldn’t be doing this” he whispered in the most frustrating tone, you just giggle and accepted every hungry kiss and bite he gives you. 

You two soon ended in your bed, hands with each other, lips to lips and bodies immensely closed. But Jaehyun didn’t want to ruin a perfect day, you didn’t have sex, but there was passion and intimacy happened in your bed that night. 

“We can have sex, hopefully next time?” He smiles sweetly while you continue to kiss him. Holding his hand and keeping him close. 

Jaehyun slept like a baby that night,  he hasnt been sleeping well ever since your relationship went downhill even more when you left, but tonight he slept like a baby. Peaceful, deep, worry less. Truth be told he didn’t want to sleep that night. He wanted to just stay beside you, look at you and bask in this feeling of being near you again. But he was just so comfortable beside you that he can’t help but sleep. 

“Good morning” you kissed his exposed back, tracing his tattoos which tickles him. He smiles sweetly his ears turning red. He missed this feeling. The feeling of waking up happy, looking forward for a beautiful day, seeing you and getting to hold you first thing in the morning. 

It feels like a dream. 

“Am I dreaming?” He asks sweetly, reaching out to you for kisses, sweet and hungry ones. Kisses on your neck, kisses on your lips. good morning indeed. 

“You know when you left, you never even visited in my dreams. It feels like my life was in constant punishment when you left” he said while touching your lips. Still can’t believe that you’re somehow…. Back together now. “By the way, I haven’t slept that good for a long time” he added.

You can really see that he’s well rested. ”Is it because of me?” You asked sincerely Jaehyun can see the guilt in your eyes. He just pulled you in for a hug and kissed you good morning, He didn’t want to ruin such a beautiful morning. 

“How about, I make us breakfast and you hug me from behind?” He suggests. 

“Sounds like a plan” you answered and placed a kiss on his head before you got up from bed. 

Both you and Jaehyun can’t believe that you slept on the same bed last night… he was looking at your ceiling with high hopes that maybe, if he could make the right things now, and make it up to you… maybe? You can come hone with him in 127 house again? Start a new life? And try again.

“Jae, what time are you going to leave today?” You disturbed his thoughts. 

“Uh… afternoon. I have to fly to Italy… for work” you already know what kind of business that is and you didn’t bother asking. What’s important is, he’s here. 

Nothing is clear with this relationship yet. Welcoming Jaehyun in your life again is like coming after what broke you. How did this happen? After today? And then what? You're back to 127 house and become a Jeong again? 

You were in deep thoughts while you watch him move around your kitchen, while he prepares a breakfast for two, while he makes your morning drink. You look at his healed tattoos, the ones that are new when you told him you wanted to leave. Maybe that’s a sign? Maybe you needed both to heal and be far from each other in order to realize that you two are meant to be. No doubt. 

“Hey,” he asked sweetly and disturbing you with your ugly thoughts. “You okay?” He asked as he hands you your food. A plate so full that it made you remember how he used to take care of you back then. 

“I was just thinking how suddenly you’re back into my life. I’m not going to pretend that I’m not thinking about it… I mean the whole idea of me leaving is to be away from you” you said as gently as possible. Jaehyun is not an unreasonable man, he understands where this is all coming. Theres no need to argue for sure, there’s no need to comment to what you said for every part of it is true. He just smiled at you. 

“Your placed changed so much, I see you really put into work on every corner. I even saw your garden, was that lemon tree I saw?” He asked with a smile, genuinely curious. 

“Yes, Taeyong planted it for me. They visited once. I suck managing this place Jae, but I love it” you chuckled, “who would have thought that I would have my own place”

“Who would have thought that I wont be part of this too,” he smiled and took a bite, “Its been what? A year already? Almost? I almost didn’t recognize you if I’m being honest you look free, you don’t look scary anymore” 

You couldn’t believe what you’re hearing, he’s just making you laugh. He loves seeing your smile. 

“While me… I’m still the same Jaehyun, the same Jaehyun that fell in love with you-“

“No Jaehyun you’re different. Every part of you is different now” Jaehyun didn’t argue further because its true. Maybe it was a compliment? Maybe not? He looks at his reflection through the dark coffee and see his face. His neck full of tattoos, he can see through his eyes that he’s broken and lost. But alas a happy man, at this point of hour.

By the time Jaehyun left you didn’t expect it feel so heavy. You wanted to ask when can you see him again? But you sure do know that doesn’t work that way. He comes when he comes. And you’re just crazy in love while waiting for him. 

“I’ll be back” is what he said before he placed a kiss on your lips, a deep one. A kiss that wanted you to pull him back to your arms and stop him from leaving your house. But no. 

What the fuck is this? Why are you jumping back to what hurt you?

“How’s everything while I’m gone?” Jaehyun asked sternly to his bodyguard. 

“We lost a few men but the deal is sealed sir. Might I add sir that your fiancé is already waiting in your private plane” 

The mentioned of the word “fiance” made him miss you already. He lets go a deep sigh and took one last look to your house before he orders his bodyguard to drive. 

When Jaehyun arrived at his private airplane, there, a lady same as your age is waiting for his fiance to arrive. She is Jaehyun’s fiance that he got into a relationship with because he’s sad and depressed because you left him. He did tried to love her at some point… but he just ends up looking for pieces of you in her that she will never have. 

Jaehyun thought that marrying himself away will eventually make the heartbreak go away… but it never did. The relationship evolved between lust and pure passion only… at first. Until her father, a powerful like Jaehyun made a deal with him. “Marry my daughter and we will be 2 families that is so powerful that no one will dare piss you off anymore”

Jaehyun agreed. Proposed and gave himself more troubles and problems. And that is the start of his fall. His mighty reign being shaken. But that is when he became honest with himself too. He needed you back in his life. 

Before the accident that brought you two together again, Doyoung is the one who suggested Jaehyun to see you and try to win you back, simply because he can’t stand what’s happening now with everything. “Maybe y/n can bring the old Jaehyun back” Doyoung said to his boss.

Not long before Jaehyun left to see you, his fiancé staged an ambush and tried killing Jaehyun. She was well aware that Jaehyun will not be easy to kill, its fun for her too. She’s crazy like that. One of the many things Jaehyun liked about her… but not anymore. 

Present time

“Well are you two together again? What does that make me?” The girl started while she poured a whiskey for herself. 

“Don’t even bother touching her. You’re aware of who she is and what she’s capable of. You’d be dead by now if she knew about you… and what you did” Jaehyun said before closing his eyes, just soaking in with the feeling of the calm you brought to his life again.

“Why cant you love me Jaehyun?”  The girl cries. 

“I tried” is all Jaehyun could say.

“Then why are we still doing this? Why are you still marrying me?” The girl asked, sobbing like a helpless person. 

“Business is business babe” he reaches for the woman’s face a caressed it like he admires her. But Jaehyun just closed his eyes and slept the whole flight. But the desperate girl went down on her knees and unbuckled Jaehyun’s belt, pulled out his cock and gave him a blow job. This girl is crazy, desperate for Jaehyun’s love and attention, but all she could have right now is lust. 

Jaehyun may be an angel inside your home, but outside of it’s four corners, he’s back to being heartless. Well, you can’t blame the man who loves you. This world that he lives in will eat him alive if he continues to be soft in front of other people. 

“Is that the best you got?” Jaehyun moans and held on to the girl’s head before thrusting slowly and deeper. Reaching low inside the girl’s throat, thrusting inside out until he cums.

Jaehyun was away for a couple of months, no calls, nothing. Taeyong and Yuta managed to visit again over the months that Jaehyun is away, you loved every moment of it. You just wish that Jaehyun could be present too, and he could spend time with the others too just like old times. Watch the sunset together. But you all know that it’s not that simple anymore. Jaehyun is different and will not understand the word friendship anymore, for he’s not looking forward to rekindling with Yuta and Taeyong too. All he cares about is… you.

“Now that you two are back…” Yuta started. 

“What’s the plan?” 

“It’s up to him. If he leaves the life that ate him whole, then maybe we can really start again. But if not… I’ll leave for good. I’ll hide from him this time. I’ll never go back there” 

“But do you think it’s going to happen now?” Taeyong adds. 

“No. Honestly. I think I’m giving myself a big trouble. You guys… I don’t even know when is he coming back, he’s not even calling? I can’t see the real Jaehyun yet. The one that I loved, the one that I married… but, now that I’m not an assassin anymore… I’ll let myself love him as my true self… you know?”

“Speaking of marriage, did you divorce him when you left?” Yuta asked. 

“No. I was hoping that… eventually, we can put it into good use? He loves me. I know enough that he will not marry anyone else besides me” 

“So you’re ready to be a Jeong now?” Yuta asked, “now that the Jeongs dont own you, are you ready to be a Jeong? … you know, like a normal person”

Assassin or not, Jaehyun’s world is crazy. And that is why you can’t answer Yuta yet. 

“I need some time” that’s all you can say and Yuta respects that.

Meanwhile… Jaehyun is celebrating for 3 months straight with his engagement. A fake happiness of course. But a good time is a good time. He will endure everything until all of this is done and he can come back to you. 

“How’s Y/n?” Doyoung asks quietly beside Jaehyun while his boss watches the sun goes down. It’s beautiful here in Italy Jaehyun thought. But the situation he’s in right now is ugly. 

“She’s good… For the first time of my life I slept soundly… beside her. During the time that we were together, I just cant help but think that… letting go of her is the best decision I’ve ever made, and I’m happy I let her go and build this life that she has right now. A life without me, without the killings, dodging bullets….” 

“So you’re giving up?”Doyoung asks calmly, “If she can’t bring your might back then what can? Who can?” 

“I’ll think of something else, but for now… I would have to keep him away from this life. She doesn’t deserve this”

After 6 months of faking happiness, never ending parties and business arrangements, finally Jaehyun arrived again at your place. Unannounced and alone. 

You just finished taking a shower, humming happily a song that you heard from the radio. You bathrobe is what covers your body, hair still wet from the warm shower when suddenly… 

“Nice song,” Jaehyun whispers beside your ear with his deep voice. 

Which startled you and made you threw a punch which he of course can dodge. He covers your mouth when you realized that its Jaehyun. Hugging him tightly in your dark room. He didn’t missed the fact that you’re only wearing a robe and you’re both happy about seeing each other again. 

“Is it a good time?” Jaehyun asked like a gentleman. He was talking about having sex. He just wanted to make sure that you’re okay with this. 

“Its a perfect timing” you said and kissed him, helped him remove his clothes. He was dressed in Prada from to toe, you already knew that he came from an important event that ended very late. A business meeting? 

“Stop it with your thoughts,” he whispers and made you focus on him by revealing you left boob and proceeds to licking your nipples. Pushing you against the wall and continues to lick and suck on your left boob until your nipple is sensitive and you’re to left to want more on the other side. He has the changed a bit when it comes to stupid shit you thought. 

He motions you on your bed without breaking what he’s doing to left boob. He bits it playfully before he stops and pushes you to your comfort. You watch him undress the last few garments he’s wearing. Specifically his expensive watch and his boxer briefs. 

And when he’s all naked on top you, kissing your exposed neck, he swiftly removed your robe and positioned him in between your legs. 

“Do you like it?” He asked first before he proceeds. 

Of course you love it. Everything he does. 

You feel him smile in between kisses. But not because of lust, he’s just happy that he’s making love with the love of his life again. 

“I love you. Always have. Always will Y/n” 

He left those words before licking the folds in between your legs, making you moan and say his name over and over again because of the things he makes you feel using his tongue. You feel him lick you slowly, from time to time and proceeds to spreading your folds and finding sensitive spots in your cunt that only he know. He has always been your weakness. 

When he was done giving that great oral, he finds your lips kisses it endlessly, down to your neck, the valley between your boobs, giving both of your boobs a good lick… as if he has kissed and marked evert part of your body. 

“I don’t have condoms with me,” he whispers while he continues to kiss your neck. “Am I lucky?” He playfully bit the shell of your ear. But you were quick to teas him. 

“After all the shit you put me through? — I have condoms by the drawer” you teased him and watch him roll his eyes but happily reaches the first condom. 

You watch pump his cock a few times while his fingers runs up and down you wet slit and watch you shiver. He rolls the condom and lines his tip on your cunt, his lips were quick to find yours as he pushes through your walls oh so slowly. Like he’s savoring every second that he’s thrusting. 

When was the last time you two made love? 

Probably the night of your wedding? 

Jaehyun hates that thought. So he thrusted deeper, watching you melt with every sensation he gives you, catch every moan you let out and grant everything you asked. 

You want him to kiss you while he fucks you? Sure. Jaehyun made sure that you’re breathless with his kisses, leaving you wanting for air. You want him to go deeper? Sure. He pins your legs down on the mattress making sure you wont close them so he could go deeper. 

“Dont stop” you moan out. And Jaehyun got excited and put you in a new position that you loved. Lifting one leg up on his shoulders as he goes deeper while fucking you. You said dont stop right? He felt you cum already, but you were so into the sex that you don’t care if you came already. You want him to keep going while he overstimulates you, putting you in all fours, pulling your body against his chest and squeezes your boobs while he fucks you.  

After a few more rounds on different corners of the bed, you and Jaehyun rest and catch your breaths after using all the condoms you have in store. “If it wasnt for the condoms” Jaehyun giggled and placed a kiss on your lips. 

“Are you staying for the night?” You asked as you cling onto him. The man keeps you around his strong arms. 

“ I will. I want to stay. Can I stay?” Jaehyun asks sweetly. 

“Of course” you answered. 

“How about your life?” You feel him keep you closer as if he’s not ready to let go if you wont allow him to come back in your life. “Can I stay in your life?” 

“Id love that” you answered him sincerely. 

And you saw the same smile he flashed the night he asked you to marry him. 

That night you realized that he loves you. And no one can ever make him happier. 

After that night, Jaehyun made sure he will not make the same mistakes again. 

Whenever he leaves, he leaves with a promise, may it be small or something big like, “I’ll fix you porch light when I come back, don’t get someone to do it” or “lets go see a movie, a musical perhaps?” 

He made sure that even though you can’t contact him through phone, you have this certainty that he will come back. 

He never brought work whenever he’s with you. This time, its you whom he saves from over working. Like now… 

Jaehyun just arrived with groceries in his hand and he you were on the phone with your boss from the library, you were talking about your updated schedules when Jaehyun just placed a kiss on your lips. You thought that … that was it. But no. He looked you in the eye and kissed you deeper, he can hear your boss through the other side of the line, reciting the dates of your schedule. When the call ended and you were breathless the whole time you were kissing, you smack his shoulder and placed a kiss on his cheek and marking the dates on your calendar. 

“Wow you’re one busy librarian…” Jaehyun says, “I’m happy for you” he smiles and kissed you one last time before unpacking the groceries. 

“How long are you going to stay? Its been three days since we last saw each other… I just noticed that you’ve been coming here more often” you smiled and hugged him from behind. 

“I’m staying longer this time because I will be away for much longer… BUT but.. don’t worry, we will have so much fun” Jaehyun felt your embrace became tighter and grow silent, but what can you do? 

“I have something for you.. its a trick to make you stay.. I hope it works tho” you blurted out and told him to go in your room. The gift is big so he can see it immediately. You didn’t go inside with him. You figured that… when he sees that gift, he will need those special seconds all to himself. 

And by the time Jaehyun saw it… you heard him play the piano again. 

He never touched one when he started training to become an assassin. But you knew that music was his first love not you. 

He went back to where you were standing, he leaned on the wall beside you and crossed his arms. “Its working… “ he smiled and kissed you deeply, thanking you countless of times for bringing music back to his life. 

Your relationship with Jaehyun went on like this for a year. Celebrating each other’s birthdays together, countless of beautiful nights and mornings of him playing the piano you gave him, giving your house life, and enjoying holidays together. Sometimes Jaehyun comes home to you with blood in his hands, but you’re well aware of what kind of person he is outside your home. You never fight or argue, Jaehyun was the one who’s so quick to stop you whenever a conversation is getting heated. The flashback of the nights during your marriage kept flashing in his head. And he will do anything in his power to stop it from happening again. 

“Mmm one more?” Jaehyun requests after you two finished your nth round for tonight. He will leave first thing in the morning so he is doing everything he can to keep you awake. 

“Jaehyun I’m defeated” you chucked and kissed him. You feel his cock go hard and you feel him hump your thigh, all you could is complain… but you love every second of it. He’s been fucking you deep and slow lately, it feels extra good because its raw. “But can you please be faster or rougher this time?”

“Why? Don’t you love it when I go deep?… and slow?” He teased as he pushes in back to your cunt. Making you moan a little louder, he bit your should and slapped your ass. Spreading your ass cheek while he pounds hard. 

“Fuck Jaehyun I’ll break-“ you struggle to tell him as he fucks you deep and rough. 

“You asked for this.. just a minute ago” he kissed your neck and bit you again, “make up you mind” 

The round ended with his mouth on your left boob, his right hand on your right boob and his cock continuously shoots loads of cum inside you. He was out of breath, you look at him and he was just as ruined as you are. 

He removed his cock slowly, kissing you all over body. Everything that he sees a little red on your skin, “sorry for this” he apologized and kiss you. 

“This is nice right?” He looks you in the eye. “Life has been so much better for us right?” 

“Yeah” and you proceed to sleeping in his loving arms. You didn’t hear it but he told you he loves you. 

On the next day, you find no Jaehyun in your bed but a note with red roses instead.

“I’ll be back by the time these roses withered. Just in time to give you fresh ones” - J 

Little did you know, he was gone early this morning because he’s getting married. 

“You told me you would be back last night?-“ Doyoung was quick to tend to Jaehyun, his cousin, his boss whom he needed to deliver at the altar in approximately half an hour. 

“The sex was good-“ Jaehyun teased Doyoung. 

“Okay shut up before you put her in trouble,” Doyoung says as he helps his boss put in his coat. 

“I need a tequila shot, I can’t do this sober” Jaehyun demands, and in a matter of second 3 tequila shots are ready for him. 

The wedding was grand. It was the biggest wedding of the century and every public platform is updated with the happening of the great Jeong Jaehyun’s wedding to the country’s darling. A power couple in the eyes of the public, but they know so little of what’s really happening. 

Every powerful businessman is invited. Every assassin that the Jeongs own is present, theres no safer place in the world right now. And Jaehyun just wants to get this over with and come home to you. And lay out his plan to you. But this is going to be a long suffering, he still have his “honeymoon” in Italy. 

Jaehyun knew that you will eventually hear about this marriage, how could you not? It’s all over the news.  Jaehyun just hopes and prays that you allow him to explain first before you curse him and leave him again. Nonetheless, he will fight for you this time.

It was a long painful waiting for Jaehyun’s return. Maybe it’s for the better so you could have time to feel the heartbreak and have time for yourself before he comes back and feed you with lies again. 

You remember the night that you two got in an argument because he thought you were accusing him of cheating, he told you, “I am many things but I will never cheat on you” 

Look at you now Jae. 

It’s obvious that the marriage is for business only. But who knows? You still have your doubts. 

It also… doesn’t change the fact that you’re the mistress now. Yes you got married but… who would believe you. He married this girl in the eyes of the world… everyone would believe that I’m a home wrecker now. 

And then you felt it….

You came running to the sink to throw up out of nowhere. You felt weak in an instant. 

Maybe its because the thought of Jaehyun? Just thinking about him makes you sick to the core. 

Or your period is late? 

“It can’t be” you thought and ran to the nearest drugstore to buy a pregnancy test. 

But as you walk your way there. You kept on thinking about the things that will happen after this. 

Jaehyun will not let you go.

Everything will be complicated again.

It can ruin his marriage, it can ruin a lot of business deals.

It will ruin him. 

This peace that you have right now will be taken away from you and bringing a baby in this scary world is the last thing you want to do now. 

But the thought of…. “what if everything works out? Jaehyun loves kids”

And all this overthinking made you miss the stop sign at the side walk and you were hit by a car in a matter of seconds.

Thank you so much for reading this work of mine! If you love what you read, please leave something in my inbox and tell me how you feel! CLICK THIS LINK. I hope we can practice, give and take.

Stay tuned for the next part! -B.

[rockstarhaechan]

masterlist

click on keep reading to see my masterlist! there are projects i’ve already finished and projects i am planning to write!

my taglists are both open! for general fics same as texts!

just submit an ask to be added into the taglists!

text format: t fics/reactions: f

nct dream:

nct dream reacting to you saying i love you first! (f)

asking nct dream to decorate the christmas tree! (t)

“you wanna bang on new year’s eve?” (t)

nct dream reacting to your performance! (t)

“guess who i pulled” (t)

“spit in my mouth” (t)

dreamies reaction to you sitting on their lap! (f)

asking dreamies to spit in their mouth! (t)

dreamies asking you to sit on their face! (t)

asking dreamies to do aegyo! (t)

calling them daddy over text! (t)

putting dreamies on a sex ban! (t)

nct dream getting caught making out! (f)

nct dream boyfriend texts (t)

nct dream reacting to you getting ur nips pierced (f)

right person wrong time (t)

being seen in dreamies vlog (t)

nct dream cheating on you (t)

asking dreamies to shout at you (t)

dreamies finding out you have a crush on them (t)

nct dream members as my fav songs (f)

asking nct dream if u are their main chick (t)

haechan:

haechan taking care of you! (f)

random texts with haechan! (t)

horny haechan texts! (t)

clubbing with haechan! (f)

lee donghyuck texts (strangers to lovers) (t)

clingy haechan texts! (t)

haechan boyfriend texts (t)

haechan boyfriend texts part.2

sleepless (f)

after hours part 1. (f)

after hours part 2. (f)

rockstar hyuck (f)

enemies to lovers (t)

high for this (f)

horny haechan texts part 2. (t)

sad haechan texts (t)

haechan drabble (f)

haechan drabble 2 (f)

get high with me (f)

random haechan texts (t)

mailboxes (f)

haechan bf headcanons (f)

jisung:

3:33pm!(f)

random texts with jisung! (t)

smutty/fluffy jisung headcanons (f)

9:21pm (f)

jisung boyfriend headcanons (f)

mark:

random texts with mark! (t)

mark drabble (f)

chenle:

clingy chenle texts! (t)

heartless part 1. (f) coming soon

jaemin:

cute jaemin texts! (t)

jaemin drabble (f)

jeno:

horny jeno texts (t)

high for this (f)

random jeno bf texts (t)

jeno bf headcanons (f)

renjun:

come closer (f)

renjun one shot (f)

you let renjun take control over you once (f)

renjun drabble

nct 127:

texting them you’re horny for them! (t)

being in a relationship with you! (f)

127 texts (t)

taeyong:

vanilla baby (f) coming soon

taeyong smutty/fluffy headcanons (f)

yuta:

rave (f)

doyoung:

doyoung boyfriend bp (f)

doyoung birthday texts (t)

jaehyun:

jaehyun thinking he’s handy dandy! (f)

jungwoo:

you made me question everything i thought i knew about love ! (f)

wayv:

boyfriend texts! (t)

wayv on sex ban (t)

“are you busy tonight?” (t)

horny wayv texts (t)

ten:

when he realized he loved you! (f)

winwin:

winwin bf headcanons (f)

conversations (f)

xiaojun:

when he realized he loved you (f)

hendery:

boyfriend texts (t)

p1harmony:

theo:

boyfriend texts (t)

ateez:

mingi:

mingi boyfriend headcanons (f)

[dalivanmagritte]

NCT FIC REC : LEE JENO Part 2

back to the nct fic rec

Jeno fic rec part.1

favs

my first and last (fav, finished serie, smut, abo!au)

no smut

unwanted competition (fluff)

the roommate contract (fluff, crack, angst, suggestive, roommate!au)

classics (smut)

hot mess (smut, college!au)

all about attraction (smut)

masturbation (smut)

big noses (smut)

skaterboy -> truth or dare? (smut)

villain (smut)

off the path (smut)

boys like you (smut, e2l!au)

stress relief (smut)

service top (smut)

sub puppy (smut)

lovesick (smut, pregnancy!au)

under the same roof (smut, roommates!au)

wake up, s*x and eat (smut)

that skirt (smut, pervy!jeno)

masked (smut, halloween!au, scream!au)

touch it (smut)

get smart (smut)

wicked games (smut, cheating)

in your eyes series ml (smut, fluff, angst)

fight club (smut, fight club!au, boxer!au)

cockwarming (smut)

videos (smut)

sub (smut)

small waist (smut)

nerd jeno (smut)

breeding (smut)

sugar and spice (smut)

breeding (again) (smut)

obsessed bf x clingy gf (smut)

alternate universe (magics, gods, royalty, etc...)

alpha himbo jeno (smut, abo!au)

may i have this dance? (fluff, royal!au, regency!era)

with another member

two is better than one x jaemin (smut)

him and his bff x jaemin (smut)

[awmancreeper]

♡︎Lonely Boy Will Stay Lonely?

Synopsis:

❣︎StayC’s Y/n is notorious for being K-pop’s social butterfly and making friends comes rather easy for her. When she’s asked to be an MC for Inkigayo, one of her co-hosts doesn’t seem too pleased to be working with her. This unknown feeling sparks a drive to become the bestest of friends with him but from the looks of it, he’ll fight her the whole way there.

PAIRING: Idol!Huening Kai X Idol!Fem.Reader

Fic Type: Social Media AU + Written Parts

Genre: Idol AU, Fluff, Comedy, SLOW BURN!!, Mutual!Pinning!, One-sided “Enemies” to Lovers

⚠︎︎WARNINGS: Swearing, Suggestive Jokes, K-Industry, Slight age gap, The following jokes with be seen: unaliving, abandonment, virginity, cheating, mental health (this series is not to be taken seriously, it’s just a goofy story) , terribly edited photos lol

Face claim: Rei IVE

Featuring: rest of TXT, STAYC, Jisung (NCT), Hanni (Newjeans), Wonyoung (IVE), Bahiyyih (Kep1er), PopUps: NCT Dream, New Jeans, Enhypen, Le Sserafim

Started: May 2023

Ended: August 2023

Status: COMPLETED

Profiles

SlayC / Tube a Tube / 4 the Girlies

♡︎Chapters♡︎

1. Toilet Bowl Toothbrush

ఌ 1.5 Teddy Bear

2. Want Me FR

3. Where’s Yoon?

4. What the Duck!

5. Who Wants It?

6. For The Girlies

7. Back of the Line

8. DHMU💔

ఌ 8.5 Real Her

9. Please You

10. Buckled Knees

11. Weather Boy

12. Monkey Leash

13. Oh Ning

14. Keeps Me Up?

15. Microwaved Burrito

16. Crazy 8

17. Y/n’s Youngluv Era>>>

18. STAN Dreamcatcher

19. PP Gang

20. Welcome Home Cheater

21. DUMPY

22. Real Eyes, Realize, Real Lies

23. Sister-in-law

24. Dying to find out

25. In Love?

ఌ 25.5 Tsundere

26. Heyyyy

27. My Mistake

28. MC Live

29. Not My Type

30. Like Him?

31. Joking Around

ఌ 31.5 y/n-kinda-boy

32. Not Captiv-Bred

33. Lock Down

34. Not Very Convenient

35. Trending AGAIN?!

36. Our Butterfly

37. I’m Sorry

ఌ 37.5 Kai-ness

38. Sowwy🥺

39. Wait For Me

40. One and Only

EPILOGUE

Taglist:!!CLOSED!! @txtbrainrot @azinwo @mackjestic @mangobee @ggggghost @adajoemaya @kainkhemistry @suzirumas @amareoverall @owotalks @justemalove @kaisdefender @aloverga @myahwritesss @justiceya @loopycorn1123 @amara-mars @samvagejkflxhrt @iraa567 @liinori @reinahwanggg @bangchansbae @heyitssarah63 @txtmetonight @lilyidk03 @roseidol @heymickyy @sofia-rom @beoms-sugar @ndriixx @myknifeyourlife @jackass1123 @fanfangying1304 @jenofairy

[nctstar]

1.

“Stop that.” He whispered against the skin of your neck. “You know he wouldn’t care.”

“That’s the problem. We need to do this properly.”

“You know why we can’t do that.”

pairing: johnyong x fem!reader (no romantic johnyong ship)

other members: none

word count: 3.7k

genre: romance, angst, with a side of smut

warnings: sexual content so minors please dni!! profanity, y/n has migraines (pretty severe!), semi-public sex, oral (fem receiving), cheating (? it's complicated), sleeping with your ex, some freaky kissing

disclaimer: this is a fanfiction purely from my (filthy) imagination. I don't know the nct members and don't claim that they act like this in real life. I also do not condone any of the activity by any of the characters in this fic. 

a/n: hi guys, i'm alive :D i've had a lot of ideas recently and a steamy johnyong drama was one of them, and then my eyes feasted upon acne studios event johnny and i finally got the push i needed to go through with writing it :) writing slump over we all cheered wooooo. also, ik it's kinda ~confusing~ rn. this is a series so just trust me okayyyy. also, i love making fic playlists and here's the one for this fic. if you picked up that this is loosely based on the 5SOS song blender pls marry me rn <3 nobody get's 5SOS like I do I swear :( pls hmu if you get me

You wouldn’t have noticed him at all, if it wasn’t for the way you watched Taeyong’s deep brown eyes flicker past you, shadows of stories passing by like it was nothing. You thought nothing of it, but your head turned, your body in tune with his more than you realised. And, just like a bad case of fate, there he was.

Johnny Suh.

He walked in like he owned the place, as he always did. His cocky demeanour hung off his body perfectly, like the oversized leather jacket he wore everywhere he went. His smile made the girl waiting on him eagerly blush, something that made you both angry and a little wistful. Your gaze lingered on far too long. And, as usual, like he always did, Taeyong pretended he didn’t notice. He always pretended, even when you were so far gone, he felt like he was pulling you out of quicksand.

“What colour looks better on me, jagiya?” Switching to Korean was your safety net, something sacred between only you and him, more intimate than the restless nights you spent tangled up in bed, Johnny’s presence a mere afterthought. You turned to Taeyong’s back, his slender body on display in the full-length mirror in front. You tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear as you both locked eyes through his reflection.

“Black.”

The seriousness, properness in the air was almost palpable, like you both were being watched, tested and graded. Not a single wrong movement, or breath. It was unbearable and at the same time, so tantalizing, like something could break the surface at any moment. Moving forward, you brought a hand up and over his shoulder, letting your fingers run over his collarbone. “Yeah. Definitely black.”

Taeyong kissed your hand, and you tried to remember when he took your hand in his. “I wanna show you a few more items. In there.” He cocked his head ever so slightly to the curtained fitting rooms, so subtle, meant to remain a secret between the two of you.

Not thinking about Johnny was like trying not to let the plague take over your body. He seeped through you like the truth, feeling right in every scenario. And in this moment, as you let Taeyong run his mouth down the valley of your breasts, your skin erupting in flames underneath his lips, you shut your eyes, and there was Johnny. Your feet on his toned calves, your hands around his thick cock. But when you opened your eyes, there was Taeyong, between your legs, right here, right now.

You clamped your mouth, moans threatening to spill out. “Oh god,” you whispered through your fingers. “R-right ther-haah…” Your thighs constricted around his head as he quickened his pace, both of your hands behind you to hold you upright.

“Hey, excuse me?”

Fuck.

It’s like someone had drawn the curtains back on you both in this compromising position. You moved away first, shoving yourself back on the complimentary bench you weren’t sure how many others had done unholy things on, Taeyong shortly after, watching your face redden with every passing second.

Johnny continued. “This one’s a little small, sweetheart. I run larger than that, you know?” You could almost see him winking at her, smiling that god-awful smile that made every woman melt like putty under his gaze. As if on cue, she giggled.

Fuck. Him.

“Come here, baby.” You spoke softly, both hands unhooking your bra as you kneeled in front of Taeyong, shuffling closer so your tits pressed again his torso, clad in a compression shirt. He groaned. “Fuck.” He grabbed your face, kissing you deeply and pushing you down to the floor.

Thirty minutes later, you were in the passenger seat, the days shopping in various sized bags in the back. You were both silent, the radio playing some obscure song neither of you knew. With the windows down, the air still felt hot and heavy, pressing onto your skin. You played with the strands of hair sticking to the back of your neck, squinting as Taeyong turned a corner and the blaze of the mid-afternoon sun poured into your eyes.

“I ended up getting both.”

“Hmm?” Condensation slipped inside your palm as you played with the cold water bottle next to the gear shift.

“Both of the caps.”

“You bought caps? You have so many at home.” The answer felt involuntary, combined with the frustration of the hot weather and lack of food since brunch. He frowned, and you immediately felt guilty. “Sorry, I mean like-“

“You said you liked the black one. You were right there.”

You felt a deep shame somewhere buried inside you as you mentally flicked back to the moments in the dressing room. The plague was making you really sick now, making you notice things you didn’t need at all, and throwing out memories of things that you really did. “R-right. Sorry, hon. Didn’t mean to snap. It’s just so hot today.” You meant to chuckle, to lighten the mood, but your body could not go through with it. Instead, the both of you sat in uncomfortable silence.

The silence stretched on for agonising miles, as it usually did. Nowadays, when you weren’t having dry, stationery conversations, you were exploring each other’s bodies like it was what you were supposed to do as a couple. Not out of passion, or lust. Just because. Your eyes kept drifting closed, the will to keep them open slipping further away from your grasp. You just wanted to be in bed…alone, slipping through the mattress and into the floor, deeper, and deeper.

You finally woke with a jolt at the sound of the door close. Your makeup felt far too heavy on the skin of your face, the ache in your feet now screaming at you. “Baby, wait.” The phrase disappeared into the air unheard, but you stepped out of the car, right in the face of a camera.

“_, _!”

Shit. How did they find us?

“Are you here alone? Who drove you here? Tell us a bit about the man in your car…” You admired the man’s insistence at his job. His passion, however intrusive and idiotic, was majorly inspiring at this phrase of your life.

Shut the fuck up, you wanted to say. You kept a stern face instead, hoping your eyes would communicate that instead. “No thanks.” You side-stepped him strategically, a new throbbing in the left side of your temple starting to grow. Fuck, not again. You tried to breathe, in, out, in, out, but the rhythm caught in your throat, your vision began to grow blurry, and you stumbled uncomfortably in your sneakers that now felt like they weighed tons.

“Ma’am? Are you alright?” You heard the man’s keys before his footsteps, the sound of his camera flashing as he approached. The light was blinding, and you dropped to your knees as the flashing sounds continued, like gunfire on a field of soldiers.  

Who the fuck still used bright-ass flash?

“Who the fuck still uses flash!” It was a yell, from maybe about 10 metres away, but the ringing in your ears fogged it up like it was underwater. You tried to focus on your breathing, but your heart didn’t care about your wellbeing, apparently, speeding up at the sound of his voice. “Get away from her, right now.” The voice, still foggy, felt closer to you, and you felt an arm around your middle pulling you gently upwards. He whispered, “Okay, sweetheart, let’s get you out of here.”

Your pain spiked at the thought of the busy, lighted McDonalds as you walked away from the man with the flash camera, somehow on the floor of the car park now. “It needs to be dark, and quiet. It won’t stop unless it is.”

Johnny made a noise of sympathy. “I know, I remember.”

You only then registered the tears, wet on the heavy-set makeup on your face. You couldn’t even look him in the eyes, a weird sense of guilt throbbing just as hard as your migraine deep in your gut. He was still walking you somewhere, and you just let him, no energy to care about anything other than the pain in your temples. He soothed you gently through whispers of something inaudible, but his breath felt warm and welcoming on your neck, and, despite it all, you were grateful for his presence.

“Go lie in the back, okay?” He shoved his jacket off as he spoke. “No cologne today. You can put it over your face. Don’t worry about anything.” You nodded, the familiar routine flooding back into you like water in on a dehydrated rock.   

Time passed like the way months pass in a busy year, and the next time you took a long, deep breath, you opened your eyes to the sensation of a firm, cold, king-sized bed. The room was dimly lit, enough so you could make out the outlines of the furniture in the room, but not bright enough to read anything if it was written on the walls. There was no lingering smell in the air, only the faint scent of your own shampoo, and no sound at all except the light ringing in your ears, much less strong than before. Your muscles relaxed like you were in a hot bath after a long day – safe, relaxed, nothing on your mind. You fell back asleep in seconds.

You woke what seemed like hours later. The room was significantly darker now, no more dusk light glowing from behind the curtains. The door was slightly ajar, and you registered voices this time coming from beyond.

“Why didn’t you just call me?”

“She was having a bad one. And, why would I have needed to call you?” You put on the slippers next to your bed without thinking, wrapping the robe you forgot you put on tight around your body. “You weren’t even there with her. What were you thinking?”

“Johnny, don’t. I stepped out to get something for her.”

“You should have known she would have the episode today. There are always signs.”

“You just said it was that asshole’s fault!”

You walked in the kitchen to see Johnny turned away, Taeyong at the end of the counter. When you met Taeyong’s eyes, you watched them widen as he stepped towards you. “Oh, honey.” You held him, his hand pressing the nape of your neck towards himself. “I was so worried. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” you squeaked. As you pulled away, Taeyong pressed a kiss to your lips, pulling away to look into your eyes and stroke the sides of your face. “You look so tired, sweetie. I should have noticed.”

“Really, it’s fine, love.” You kissed him back, making awkward eye contact with Johnny towards the end. Shuffling awkwardly, you cleared your throat. “Um, we should get going.”

“No, you’re staying for dinner.” Johnny threw a towel over his shoulder in a way that was comical, almost making you laugh. You smiled, trying to ease the situation. “Johnny, really. I appreciate it, but-“

“There’s no way you both can drive all the way back to the apartment.” Your heart skipped as you heard him say the and not your. That one word gave you that illusion that time had stopped, and that the past 10 months had all been a dream, and you were still there, in the kitchen, pressed up against his body without a care.

You shook your head, willing the memories and coming back into reality all at the same time. “You can’t. You’ve just had your worst episode. No thanks to that grade A fucktard who doesn’t know how to use a camera in the 21st century.” He rolled his eyes. “Car trips will make you nauseous.”

“No! I mean,” you rubbed your head. “Me and Taeyong, we have this, um, this event…” You knew it was a weak argument, but you threw it out anyway. When you looked over at Taeyong, he was, of course, shaking his head. “I’m sure Jaehyun won’t mind. It’s the album release party.” He looked over to Johnny, who nodded politely.

“You can still go. Just drop me off at home.”

“Nonsense, _. You spend the night here.” You and Taeyong both looked at each other, you with an expression of clear distaste, and Taeyong with something a bit less than that. “I mean…didn’t you say you had a thing?”

“Yeah, I mean, she’s not a kid. She can stay by herself. Call us if you need anything. But she shouldn’t get into the car.” Taeyong hummed in agreement as Johnny walked towards the both of you, and you looked at the both of them incredulously. “Did you both just decide on plans without me?” You crossed your arms. “Unbelievable.” It came of surprisingly playful, making them both laugh, Johnny now sizing you up with his eyes like he always did. “You like the robe?”

“Y-yeah.” For a second you were too comfortable, looking right into Johnny’s eyes, wanting more than anything to be in his arms. Your body, your mind, this house…you were there, 10 months ago, back when it was all okay, it was right. Forgetting that Taeyong was right here, staring at you back, wishing you were here right now.

“You gonna be okay here, baby?” Taeyong brought your hands into his, pulling you close as Johnny walked away. You nodded, smiling up at him with passion in your heart for the first time in what felt like too long. The guilt started throbbing in your gut again, but you grabbed his face in your hands, kissing him deeply until you felt it ebbing away.

∞

“Shh. You need to be quiet. My niece is here.”

That was the sentence that rang like alarm bells in your brain. At first, your entire body tensed up, the unfamiliar surroundings making you confused. Memories of the day came back, and you relaxed a little, finally registering what was going on.

The sounds of a woman giggling and going shh in an exaggerated tone made you feel like someone threw all your emotions in a blender. Annoyance, confusion, anger, sadness, lust…it all swirled and mixed intentionally, blades cutting through each one at lightning speed.

Both of their bodies thumped upstairs, and it wasn’t long before she started moaning like a pornstar.

Your. Fucking. Niece. Is. Here??

You made a face of disgust at nobody as the noises continued. “If I was your niece, I would be reporting you to CPS.” You slammed back into bed, momentarily delighted that the painful throbs in your brain were gone far enough that you could throw yourself around easily. You pushed a pillow on top of your face, as if you were in a teen movie and you needed to throw a tantrum. At the third Oh, harder! girlish squeal that you heard, you were ready to go through with it.

Instead, your brain decided to flash through memories of yourself and Johnny. Back when you weren’t his fake niece, and instead the giggly drunk girl he would take upstairs to fuck the living daylights out of.

Fuck. Why am I thinking about this? You were stretching your arm uncomfortably out, too lazy to get out of bed to reach your phone, thinking about calling Taeyong to distract yourself or to come get you when the noises upstairs stopped.

“FUCK YOU!”

It was so loud it made you jump.

You heard the deep tenor of Johnny’s voice in the background, before her higher-pitched one cut through the air. “Fucking asshole!” You heard thumps of footsteps, much quicker and lighter than before, and sounds of zippers being pulled. When they stopped close to the door of your room, which was still slightly ajar, you kept thinking shit. There was no way you could pretend you were asleep this entire time anymore.

“Give me your fucking car keys. I’m leaving right now.”

“Look, I-“

“Do you even remember my name?” The small but significant silence that followed was so intentionally on point that you couldn’t help but snigger, covering your mouth with your palm to remain quiet.

When you heard the door slam, you lay properly in bed, still going with the plan that you were gonna pretend you somehow slept through that. As if like a badly-scripted TV show, the door to your room opened as you tried to tuck yourself in, not quick enough to avoid Johnny at the door.

“Oh, hey.” For some reason, everything was immediately extremely funny, and it was like trying to guide an elephant going estray, the way everything in you was trying not to burst out laughing.

“Sorry about the noise.”

“It’s fine.” You tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “I was awake anyway. Migraine’s pretty much gone.” You gestured awkwardly to your head, reaching out to grab your phone now properly. “I think Taeyong’s ready to pick me up now.” You turned the screen on as you said this, as if you just read texts from him. In reality, your phone was dry and empty, the lockscreen of you and Taeyong making a heart at the beach last summer glaring back at you in the dark. “I’ll be out of your hair soon.”

“No trouble.” He walked into the room, door now fully open. You crossed your legs on the bed, not knowing what to say or how to act, not knowing why he was now silently looking over the dresser in the room to your left.

“I said your name.”

Your blood froze, body reacting before your brain. You sputtered, “I, uh, what?”

He opened his mouth to reply, now fully turned towards you, but you brought a finger to your own lips. “That’s okay. Don’t need to explain, Johnny. I, just, why would you say that?” The last part refused to remain a thought in your heard, instead spilling out of you in words drenched in emotional blender soup.

“You just said you don’t need an explanation.”

“Ugh, Johnny,” you rubbed your temples, not because of an incoming migraine, but in a more dramatic, single mom in a bad murder mystery novel kind of way. “You always do this. You know what I mean.”

When you looked up, his eyes were softer than you thought. He looked…vulnerable, and lost. He had the other end of that string that you held onto as you slipped deeper into the quicksand, standing there, looking like only one who could pull you out.

He walked closer to you, and your body did not move away. He got close enough to sit on the edge of the bed, slouched over, and you dragged your legs over to sit next to him. “I’m your fucking niece?” You laughed easily now, and you watched his body vibrate as his body copied yours. “It was the only thing I could think of in the moment, okay?” His smile made your body feel electric, like you could conquer anything in that moment. And for a moment, you surrendered to the notion that it was exactly 10 months ago, on the precipice of the moment it all fell apart.

Why did you break up with me? You wanted so desperately to say, your voice coarse from screaming it in your mind for hours every day. But instead, you answered his measured attempts to keep a light conversation.

“You had any migraine this bad in a while?”

“No.” you shook your head, now tucking your legs in underneath you to lean on the bedframe, his body turning to face you as you did. “Been seeing a new physician. She’s much better.”

“Oh yeah? Finally dumped Dr Misogyny?”

“Uh huh. I figured I didn’t need someone who kept trying to convince me I was overreacting and being hysterical.”

“Mmm. Good on you, sweetheart.” Even though you knew how easily Johnny threw endearing terms around, your stomach still flipped violently at his reply, and you gulped.

“Taeyong’s been good too. He’s sleeping a lot better. Not working too late anymore.”

“That’s good.” Johnny readjusted on the bed, inching closer towards you. “He works way too hard. As do you.”

“Johnny…” Your voice ever so slightly caught in your throat, and it was noticeable enough for him to catch. You mentally cursed, but that’s when something in you went fuck it, and you went in straight for the kill.

“Why did you leave me…us?” Your voice shook, no matter how strongly you willed it not too, and the last word came out like a forbidden whisper.

He looked directly into your eyes, as if he was relieved that you asked him, like he’d been holding onto the response for the past 10 months. “I…I regretted it every single day.”

“Then you should have fucking told me.” You sucked in a breath. “You could have said anything to me, and I would have come running. I trust you, I…I love you.” Every breath felt painful as you let your confession hang in the air dangerously. “You know that.”

“I know, _.”

Before you could even let yourself process the moment, you leant over and kissed him. The guilt throbbing in your gut exploded like a small fire as it catches on to grow endlessly large and overwhelming. He grabbed your body, lifting you to rest on his lap, your kisses growing feverish with heat.

When you pulled away, you opened your eyes to come to your senses. “N-no, we shouldn’t.”

“Stop that.” He whispered against the skin of your neck. “You know he wouldn’t care.”

“That’s the problem. We need to do this properly.”

“You know why we can’t do that.”

“I don’t, Johnny. I don’t know why we can’t.” You began to argue with him, but he shut you up by hoisting your upper body further and further up, biting and sucking the skin down the base of your neck, collarbone, and between your breasts. Your arms latched onto his muscular shoulders as you rocked naturally on his lap. “God, fuck you, Johnny.” He chuckled against your clothed torso.

“Give me a second.” He pushed you gently backwards, rising up on his knees to let you watch as he pulled his shirt off with one hand. He fell on top of you in one fell swoop, kissing you between the cages of his muscular arms. His body rolled onto yours, making you gasp. “Johnny, I-“

“I know. Just let me. Okay?”

[8myass]

୨୧ ‧₊˚ 🍵 ⋅ hi, y'all! i'm new to this community and i just wanted to do a little "intro to my account" post with a bit about me and my writing! `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ my name is lele, i go by she/her pronouns, and i'm 18 y/o, but i've been writing (and reading) fanfics for years. `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ this is an 18+ account for the mature themes written. i know minors will read anyway, so just read responsibly and understand what you're getting into. there should be no shocker when there is smut in a smut story. `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ i follow everyone back! `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ will include a lot of dark content, fluff isn't my strong suit. `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ works are scheduled to be posted every saturday and sunday (hopefully). `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ if you enjoy my works, please like, comment feedback, and reblog! that would be very much appreciated!! 🩵 `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ requests are open! `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ prompts for requests are found here, but any requests are appreciated ♡. requests will be answered out of order, so it might take a bit for me to wrack my brain of good content to answer requests! `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ anons are welcomed. `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ currents anons are: 🧺 `✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ taglist is open!

ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ- what i won't write: strictly bxb content (i'm inexperienced, maybe i'll try it in the future, also might be on sidelines of stories), incest, mpreg, male reader for smut (as i am not male, i deem it hard to write the mc as a male. but gender neutral is okay), nothing much that i won't really write. ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ- what i do write: gxg, stepcest, age gaps (legal), infidelity/cheating, noncon (no consent given), dubcon (consent is questionable), cnc (roleplayed noncon scenarios, but it's fully consensual), bondage, any kink you can think of (no piss/shit kinks tho 😐), pegging, dom!reader, switch!reader, yandere, stalkers/stalking, gore, knife play, gun play, sensory play, branding, murder (not of mcs), omegaverse / a/b/o (never written before, i can't promise it'll be good, but i can try??), dacryphilia, unprotected sex, breeding, voyeurism/exhibitionism, blackmail, sensory deprivation, femdoms (whether this means reader or idol), g!p, anal, threesomes/foursomes/anysomes rly, orgies/gangbanging, monster fucking??? idk ig that's all for now, i'm willing to try everything at least once, i'm a rather experimental writer. if it's not listed, i will probably write it anyway lmao. ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ- genres i write: smut (w or w/o plot, preferably w), fluff, angst, horror/thriller, suggestive, crack, honestly just anything (always experimenting). ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ- what i write: series (possibly), drabbles, oneshots (less than 4k words), fake texts, headcannons, hard/soft thoughts, full-fics (more than 4k words). ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ- boy groups i write for: nct (all units; nct dream, nct 127, wayv, nct wish but only fluff for all minors), riize, seventeen, stray kids, txt. however, i'll write for any boy group! these are just the only ones that my brain typically needs no help in coming up with ideas for. male soloists can be written for as well! (ngl, i just write for anyone i feel like, so any group is open for requests) ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ- girl groups i write for: (g)i-dle, aespa, blackpink, itzy, newjeans (only fluff for hyein and haerin), le sserafim (only fluff for eunchae), twice, and mamamoo. (kard can also be requested as a co-ed group, female soloists are all able to be written for as well) (i really just write for anyone, so anyone is open for requests too)

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ you can find my male idol masterlist here and my female idol masterlist here! ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ recent works: nct 2023 yandere headcannons, suicidal (yandere!felix) ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ what i'm currently working on: your touch (yandere!anton) [wip, but on hold]

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ jaehyun 2024 birthday event!! [m.list for event can be found here] (on hold)

[fics-lovebot]

nct fic recs

main masterlist

· · ♡ · · tysm to the amazing creative minds of the writers for giving me sevaral moments of joy reading your creations

i´ll be constantly updating this list so make sure to check it out often for new recs ;)))

pls remember to reblog if you like any of my recs❤️

poly

mark

whats mine its yours - ft. the dreamies, haechan is tired lmao, an intervention needed to happen bc mark was doing the most, he´s just awkward and in love tbh, trying to be a real gentleman bc reader is drunk, they´re into each other a lot but mork is just a nervous drunk mess, cuteeee

sex ban - smut, mark it losing it fr dslfkjhlsdh "He wasn't sure if he was just thinking with his dick, but it felt like you were trying to push him to his limit." you deff were lmao

jaehyun

right where i left you - ANGSTY AFFF, cheating au, break up au, no happy ending, this made me cRY AT 3AM!!, it has 2 parts

johnny

yuta

jungwoo

pancakes - dad!jungwoo, pregnant!reader, just another everyday morning with his daughter, it´s cute

doyoung

taeyong

haechan

bus stop - fluff, love at first sight kinda, it´s short but it´s a sweet read

jeno

jisung

jaemin

renjun

chenle

hendery

naughty boy - fluff, suggestive, established relationship, he is proud of his hickeys, goofy ahh

yangyang

ten

xiaojun

winwin

kun

[technologyculturedneo]

Scented Poison. Final Scent

PAIRING. Jaehyun x Reader x Jaemin (ft Taeyong)

GENRE. Established relationships. Cheating. Office drama. Smut. Angst.

SYNOPSIS. What happens when a perfectly hidden affair becomes public? You feel almost petrified and exposed when Jaehyun (your husband) and Jaemin (the man you've been sleeping with) officially meet. Jaemin isn't afraid of twisting his words to get Jaehyun paranoid, neither is he holding back on the feelings he's grown for you. Meanwhile, you're so hell bent on securing and hiding this lie away from Jaehyun that it almost becomes impossible to tell him the truth. All the while Jaehyun grows more suspicious of your relationship with Jaemin that it strains your relationship. You find yourself left with no other option, but to come clean. The only problem now, is how to come clean to the man you've married, and the man you've been having an affair with.

WARNING. Slow burn (longshot). Office drama (mentions of inappropriate acts/unethical practices). Cursing (mild and soft). Smut (includes and not limited to cheating, consensual and non-consensual, rough/dominant, submissive, dry humping). Angst (has levels of tones). Betrayal (heartbreak)

WC. 34k

Disclaimer. I thought I posted this shot a long time ago (I'm talking 2 months back) but I didn't realize that I left it on post privately. And so for 2 good months, this amazing last part of scented Poison had been sitting in my Tumblr basement 👁️😭. I'm officially the saddest person on earth. But I digress, because this was absolutely a masterpiece to write ENJOY!

Masterlist: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

The morning comes indicating and showing itself by shining through the curtains. Your eyes flicker open seeing the rays of light peeking through your bedroom windows. The windows are large, and so the light comes throughout the whole room. You sit up on your plushie bed surprised that you’re dressed in your white silk night dress and that you’re in your room. Last night you recall Jaehyun arriving home early and that you both drank wine and made love on the floor in one of the living rooms. However, you’re on the bed and Jaehyun's spot is empty and your heart gets sad. “Did I dream it all?”

Your head moves to the side when the bathroom door opens and your eyes make out the walking figure of your Jaehyun as he wears different styling of clothing- instead of the typical black work attire. "Wearing causal clothes feel so foreign," Jaehyun mutters as he exits the bathroom. A chuckle leaves your lips as you become happy that you didn’t dream it. He looks up to the sound of your chuckle, his eyes lighting up. “You’re awake. Good morning baby,”

You stretch your arms wide getting out of bed with a sleepy yawn as you flipper yourself to him, pulling him closer to you. He doesn't resist at all, even when you drag him onto the bed and continue hugging him and all you can do is tug him in an enormous hug wrapping one leg around him. He smells so good and he chuckles hugging you back.

"I thought I dreamt it all. I’m happy you’re here. Moring,” You mummer in a tired sleepy breath feeling his warmth against your skin. “Okay, I feel gross now." You get off him standing up and stretching your arms out. It’s upon standing that you feel your lower half being satisfied. Jaehyun meanwhile sits up on the bed watching you with a smile and happy eyes, especially when you turn back to him with a pleased smile. "You look like you’re ready to do something fun,”

“With you of course,”

“Well then, I'll quickly go and get ready and prepare a special breakfast for you then we can go out. Right?"

He stands up with his hair that's still a bit wet. "Anything you want,"

You lean back on your seat, with your legs crossed. The wind blowing gently while slightly carrying your flowy dress lifting it up lightly, you place your hand on your knee to not allow the dress to go higher, just as you sit opposite from your husband, a smile never leaving your face. You’re both sitting on a table of two as you ponder on whether to order the food inside the store or not. This decision is tough, because even though sitting outside of the cozy little brick building of a beverage and diner spot, you can tell how nervous your husband is to unveil his emotions.

He looks as though he should be doing something but he doesn’t know what, thus his eyes staring mindlessly into his drink and back at the inside of the store. You can only wonder what his thoughts are- but you’re sure you know what’s on his mind. Jaehyun leans back on his seat fixing the black sunglasses over his head as he sips on his wine again and breaths out looking at his drink. His face looking extremely worrying. Your eyes are stuck on him, finding him the most fascinating and amusing. Admiring his carefree, nervous yet charmed appeal, he slowly begins to look tense when noticing your eyes, sitting up straight and leaning over the table, he smiles at you while whispering. “It’s awful.”

You burst out laughing covering your mouth trying to lower your voice, but end up closing your mouth and your shoulders shudder in laughter. “I told you that they’ve changed in the weirdest of ways. Let’s just go eat someplace else,”

“No let’s stay, it can’t be that bad,” He continues smiling seemingly trying to convince you.

“You sure?” You ask your eyebrows raising in amusement. “I know you can’t handle your garlic well, and they’ve just began adding a lot of garlic to all their meals. I mean, I like garlic, but I don’t think you can handle it that well.”

“C’mon, it can’t be that bad.”

“Okay, if you say so,” You smile as you shrug your shoulders allowing him to have his moment. It’s seriously been so long, since the both of you went out and spent time together. Allowing him his time to express himself has you feeling like you’re back in the honeymoon phase.

He nods his head, before peeking to the inside of the store waving his hand once. In an instant, the chef of the store comes out with a polite smile. The chef being his old time friend. Moon Taeil. “Mr Jung, are you ready to order? We’re truly pleased to have you back here. How did you like the wine?”

You hide your face, knowing it’ll give away your jeering smile. Jaehyun hums out and nods his head. “Was it a new recipe drink?”

“Yes,” The chef smiles proudly. “We tried to create a brand new taste for this opening mouth, the wine festival is in a few weeks so we need to prepare. How was it? We’ve added a hint of garlic,”

“I think I can grow into it,” Jaehyun has a plastered smile on his face, looking up into the man’s face. “I’m ready to order,”

His grin enlarges yet again. “Don’t forget, it’s all on the house today. So get as much food as you like,”

“You’re very kind Mr Moon Taeil, I’ll eat and enjoy this meal. So yes, we’ll have the large pack of chicken breasts seasoned with everything except garlic, if it’s possible. Think we could do it separated with extra mild sauce for the madam and hot spicy for myself. Would you like garlic in your chicken?” Jaehyun asks you.

“I don’t mind,” You reassure as he looks over the menu.

“Alright, garlic for the madam. I would love some Italian styled spaghetti while my madam wants your soft slurping special noodles. A medium side tomato salad dish for me, without garlic again, a small avocado salad for the madam, I presume with garlic?”

“Yes, and a lot of paper and lemon,” You direct to Taeil before turning back to Jaehyun. Having him by your side, ordering your food makes you happy because really- it feels certainly real that he’s here with you, and that you’re not eating all alone (like all the other times).

“And lastly two full baskets of fries will do, is that okay?” He turns to you and you nod your head smiling at him. “The fries should be seasoned with minor salt. Oh, can I get the same beverage, and my madam?” Jaehyun turns to you with a little smile, asking you what you want to drink, just as he hands the menu to the chef.

“It seems like we’ll be eating a full meal,” You sit up with a charming smile. “Just water will do,”

“No problem madam, I want you to eat to your hearts content today. Enjoy yourself here, I’ll make the best full meal you’ll adore. Are you sure you want just water, not even with strawberry rizz the way you like it?”

“I’ll get full really quick if I keep drinking, but I want that strawberry rizzed water, I love how you make it,”

“No problem Madam,” Mr Moon Taeil, the chef walks back into the store and you turn to Jaehyun with playful wide eyes.

“You’ll grow into it?” You mock from how he commented that he’ll grow into the garlic flavored beverage.

“What?” Jaehyun smirks and elegantly speaks highly of his friend. “Mr Moon is the only man I can trust when it comes to eating outside. I trust that I’ll truly grow into it. He’s the best. Plus we’ve known him since college, so relax bae. I’m sure maybe it was just the beverages, he’ll come through with the food,”

“I can’t complain, because I only came here once without you and the food left my mouth in a garlic taste, and I never came back again. Anyway, you were saying?”

As you and Jaehyun simply chat on about a new fragrance he wants to launch, as well as the types of food and cravings that he has missed, your eyes do a double take when right behind Jaehyun- a whole street away, you see a face that you’re not too sure if you should be seeing. Your heart beats faster and you tilt your head to be in direct line with Jaehyun, hoping that you won’t be seen from the couple that seems to be approaching. However, it becomes difficult when Jaehyun quickly announces he needs the rest room. You sink your head down pretending to take interest on the table utensils. You hold onto them gulping down the bile bitter taste in your mouth.

Your eyes notice their stilettos stopping by the entrance of the diner and you hear a very irritated Haera. “Seriously Jaemin, you want to eat here? Why?”

You make the mistake of peeking up, because instantly you catch Jaemin slightly pointing at you. He smiles when you simply stare at him. You hold in your breath when he walks forward with his hands in his black sweatpants and matching black hoodie with a black cap inside. Your cheeks heat up when he moves forward and instead of coming to you, he moves past you. You see Haera folding her arms shaking her head with a strong disapproval look.

You turn your head around when hearing a strong scrapping sound- coming from Jaemin dragging another table. Aligning it with your table, his slanted head turns to you and he looks cheerful. “Hey,”

“Hi?” You utter out in confusion as you watch him take the two chairs that were once on the other table. “Jaemin you can’t do that, you’ll block the whole side walk,”

“Don’t worry, I’ve done this before at another restaurant. If the tables are outside, you can do anything with them,” He mummers after placing a chair for Haera. “Sit,”

Surprisingly, he takes a seat next to you breathing out gleefully, but when looking up at Haera he sighs as if challenging her. You’re unsure of the gaze they share, but it looks intense with Jaemin having a strong glare on his face while Haera looks really angry and her tongue poke her cheek before she sits opposite from Jaemin. “Fine. We’ll eat here. Anything for my so called love who got promoted as his worthless job,”

“Thank you to my dear ungrateful wife. So,” Jaemin breaks your gaze away from Haera and unto him, where you meet his pumped smile. You wonder why he’s smiling so much. Of course it could be because you had sex with him twice yesterday, but otherwise, there’s this strong happiness radiating out of him. “I wanted to thank you again for your gift, it lit up the house,”

“You’re welcome,” You meekly respond, trying not to make eye contact but feeling warm when he’s eyes don’t leave your face. You don’t know when, but there’s a friendly vibe around the two of you. Of course you don’t want to give in to the friendly vibe but you reciprocate his smile feeling hesitant knowing Haera’s sharp eyes are on you.

“Are you here alone?” He asks. “Thought we could join you. Did you already order?”

“I’ve told you one too many times Jaemin, she eats alone for a living. As if she doesn’t have a husband,” Haera articulates, yet instantly looks up when hearing someone clear their throat. Her eyes widen upon the figure of a person she hasn’t seen in years. “No way. You’re really here?”

Jaehyun’s eyes distastefully turn to her, blinking once. Seeing her only perks a spite of anger in him. It was only yesterday whereby he warned her that if she ever angered you again, then he’d blacklist her.

Haera is simply stunned seeing Jaehyun. Honestly, the last time she saw him was in his prime chubby years. Even though he became successful years later, Haera couldn’t care any less about his image, only that he was a millionaire making money and cheating on his wife. But now seeing him, her eyes take in his toned, bulky, slim yet firm features all over his body. He looks truly like a millionaire bachelor living the life. There’s no way, the fat chubby Jaehyun turned into a hunky piece of meat in under 2-3 years. Not only his figure, but his whole presence- and aura.

Being too stunned to speak Haera simply blinks and looks at Jaehyun up and down, but Jaehyun’s nonchalant cold stare turns to the man who’s sitting close to you. Jaemin is up on his feet in an instant bowing his head and body until his cap almost touches the table. Jaehyun is fazed when the bowing man gets up straight and smiles. If anything Jaehyun’s stone cold yet serious face wavers when blankly staring at Jaemin, especially after hearing Jaemin addressing him. “Good day sir,”

While your ears as well as Haera’s eyes are equally shocked upon Jaemin addressing your husband as sir- the both of you gasp out with different reactions. Jaehyun’s eyes go from Haera to you wondering why you’re gasping, before he speaks to Jaemin. “You’re the new replacement for Jungwoo right? Jaemin, is it?”

Haera’s eyes marvel in huge orbs. “Wait-” She gasps and turns to Jaemin in shock. “You know him?”

“Haera, this is my boss,” Jaemin’s words causes your forehead to heat up and your chest to tensely rise and fall. They know each other? “The Fragrance owner-”

“I fucking know that you dick head!” She whisper yells through clinched teeth seemingly joyful. “Babe! Why didn’t you tell me that he was your boss? You fucking work for-” Despite not liking Jaehyun and having the assumption that he always cheats on you, she envied his riches and money, a man making money was like the doorway to her soul. For Jaemin to be working- wait for Jaemin to have gotten promoted could really be a big game changer for her. Especially since Jaehyun knows his name. So this is why Jaemin was so excited yesterday. He was excited because of this promotion and not some flumsy workplace promotion- this was the big deal! Haera instantly feels this pride and joy in her husband. Finally, he stepped up. “I love you so much right now babe,” Haera whispers.

In the midst of Haera hushing out praises to her husband, your heart still thuds and drops all the way down when hearing Jaehyun say Jaemin’s name again. They know each other? How do they know each other? Jaehyun surprises you again when he addresses Jaemin. “Mr Na, is this your partner? Are you two, joining us?”

“Yes sir,” Jaemin is still respectful and controlling himself, even taking off his hat to show his respects. You can tell his in high awe of his boss, respects Jaehyun and seems slightly timid when politely smiling all the time, and that crushes you. Not only does Jaehyun know this person, but you’ve been having an affair with this person.

“Honey?” Jaehyun calls calmly and you jump when seeing he’s got your hand in both his big warm hands. Your heart scrambles and you can hear the beating in your ears but you try to calm down and smile hesitantly. Jaehyun is sitting down now, and so is Jaemin. And they’re both looking at you. You keep your eyes firmly on Jaehyun who tries to soothe you by rubbing your hand. “If you’re not comfortable being here we can go-”

“Honey?” Jaemin mumbles to himself. Slowly leaning back in his seat as if Jaehyun’s sudden odd presence makes sense. “Honey as in… husband?” Jaemin’s eyes are left in astonishment, his eyes never leaving Jaehyun.

You don’t even need to speak for Jaemin to quickly piece the pieces together. Instead of surprise, or terror for sleeping with his boss’s wife, a deranged proud leer sets on his face as he sinks in the background upon realizing that he’s been fucking the boss’s wife, you all this time. Jaemin is in absolute shock that he can’t even comprehend the livid details that his boss looks caring when holding your hand and smiling gently with you while caressing your hand, on top of that he’s dressed in the most normal of clothes and isn’t in his usual black suit that terrified everyone. The image is so defying and contrary to the ‘Jaehyun’ he knows within the workplace. Jaemin wants to laugh at the misperception, but he’s still fazed of being before his boss that he doesn’t know whether to act civil and professional, or relax in the same manner that his boss is doing.

Inside of work, Jaehyun is vicious and ferocious, he is demanding and makes it clear to everyone that they work for him only to get his money. He doesn’t seem like the type to be tamed or even held down, by a petite woman like you. Jaehyun strives in competition and is wrathful and egotistical and can do anything to get what he wants, Jaemin analyzes how Jaehyun got to the top. That same man seems more like a man of high social bars who sleeps around to relieve stress…he doesn’t give off the impression that there’s someone at home who he’s looking after.

Jaemin low-key watches your interaction with your husband and is surprised by the whole ordeal. Jaehyun’s eyes at work seem ready to kill and attack with just one stare, yet here with you, he’s being attentive and his eyes don’t seem at all harmful. He looks enticed by you. Jaemin can even see it, that Jaehyun is head over heels for you with the way he’s eyes go all over your face and whispering in such a soothing manner that makes his voice angelic.

Jaemin can only lean back in his seat in pure amusement of what he’s seeing. Jaemin doesn’t feel too intimidated by this form of his boss.

So this is the husband in which Haera has been spreading rumors that is sleeping with his secretary? The husband which is rarely around to satisfy you? Your husband, his boss? Your husband is his boss, that Haera has lied about? Jaemin can only look away with an amused smile. “What the actual fuck?” He mummers.

Jaemin’s attention is snapped back to reality when your chair screeches back. You feel your body heating up by both male figures staring at you. Your legs suddenly giving into the guilt of what’s been happening behind closed doors as they shake. “I’m a bit lightheaded. I…. I… I’ll be… I need to use… I….” You don’t finish your hesitant sentences as you let go of Jaehyun’s hand and slip out of your chair rapidly going inside the diner feeling your hands shaking. Haera with quick senses follows you- fearing that you might cause a scene resulting in Jaehyun and you leaving, and that would be bad because she wanted Jaemin to have this moment to become ‘friends’ with your husband.

“Y/n you’re being selfish right now-”

“I’m being selfish?” You turn to Haera in heavy shock as you blink at her.

Of course she doesn’t understand that you’ve been screwing her husband behind her back. You don’t know if she’d care that you’ve been sleeping with her husband. Jaemin has said that his relationship with Haera is just a hoax, not serious, only as a means for Haera to use him as a rebound- but still, she’d completely flip if ever coming to the truth that you have been…. That you as her best friend have betrayed her, that you as the one that she cried to for several months about Donghyuck (her ex), have been playing behind her back laughing and smiling with her husband. Donghyuck may have left her with spots that will never be filled again, but you were there to always assure her that her next husband will never disappoint her- but yet what do you do- you screw her husband.

“Haera, you’re the one being selfish right now. I just wanna spend time with my husband and not have to see you or your husband and have the both of you ruin-”

“Babes you won’t even hear a word from my mouth. I promise I’ll be quiet, please my husband just got a promotion and I’m so proud of him. He’s finally making it and-”

“No!” You shake your head with your heart beating fast. With the way Jaemin was secretly smiling, you don’t trust that he won’t cause a scene. “I can’t risk anything.” You mention making a straight beeline for any waiter.

Meanwhile outside, Jaehyun’s ears perk up right after his eyes follow Haera who’s chasing after you before he turns his head back to Jaemin who speaks. “I didn’t know Y/n was your wife sir,”

Hearing that comment makes Jaehyun mobile, he’s wondering why Jaemin is on first name basis with your name. “And I didn’t know your wife is fairly loud.”

Jaemin chuckles lightly. “Are you afraid she might corrupt your wife?”

Jaehyun gives Jaemin his best uninterested stare before replying. “Personally I’m not a fan of your wife.” Jaehyun’s about to get up to attend to you, yet Jaemin speaks again.

“Why is that? Is it because of the things she’s said about you?” Jaemin doesn’t know where the confidence comes from, but it makes him feel empowered in some twisted way that he’s been inside you many times to have a say in the relationship he shares.

Jaehyun has a twisted face. “Pardon?”

“I hate Haera’s lies too,” Jaemin has a secret smile when having Jaehyun freeze for a mere second before sending an all too familiar stone stare in Jaemin’s way. Jaemin goes on to filling Jaehyun in on the little drama. “I mean no disrespect sir, I didn’t know she was your wife so back then I had no say, but now… For a while now, my wife has been speculating that the only reason your wife is with you is because of the money, and she also has reason to believe that you’re cheating on her with your secretary.”

“What nonsense-”

Jaemin quickly raises his hand in surrender looking amused and pretending to be stunned by the news. “I know right, I’ve been telling her that it’s rubbish, she shouldn’t say things like that. Working under you, I know you’re an ethical man with high principles and morals. And I don’t think you’d cheat on Y/n. She’s beautiful.” Jaemin feels a bit hot headed when pouring the juicy details unto Jaehyun. He can’t help it, he just wants to understand why Jaehyun doesn’t satisfy you. “But also being around your wife a lot frequently I know she’s not after money, but something more traditional, something like love. She already has everything she needs except a solid foundation of trust. I don’t know why my wife does that to her,”

Jaemin’s words cause Jaehyun to breathe in once before leaning back on his seat not as eager to check up on you anymore. “Are you their mediator? Making sure your wife doesn’t get out of hand? Because if so, you’re not doing a good job. I might step in because if you must also know, she’s demoralizing my wife.”

“That’s why I’m simply there to comfort your wife sir.” Jaemin adds very calmly with an assuring smile. Which only makes Jaehyun stop in uneasiness. Comfort? “There’s only so much I can do to my wife, but her mouth runs on her own. I hate seeing your wife sad because of mine, so I apologize there. Knowing now that she’s your wife, I’ll make sure to keep Haera in line. Because your wife is remarkably wonderful. You know actually, after getting my promotion she treated me to something special, so it adds onto her charm of how loving she is, and I wouldn’t want to hurt her.”

“She got you something special?” Jaehyun’s brow raises slightly as he listens to Jaemin.

Jaemin smiles innocently and looks to the side upon realizing that Jaehyun has never cheated (merely being because everyone in the office believes that they’re boss is in a relationship with his work as he hardly ever mentions anything outside of work, and when he does it’s mostly about his competitive business partners. Jaehyun is married to his work). “Yes, nothing big. We went out to celebrate. Afterwards, uh she got me some flowers?” Jaemin chuckles lightly upon remembering when he got home after ‘massaging you’ and he saw the gift you got for him. “A congratulatory card, fresh vintage wine- that was expensive, and some striking polaroid pictures of her new album collection.”

Jaehyun can only think of how he saw the latest bit of your work, and they were erotic collections. To think that Jaemin got a sneak peek into your new collection makes him wonder how close you too are. Usually customers buy pictures, but somehow you’re giving it away to him. How close are you with him? And not only that, but Jaemin seems fond of you in a light way, but there’s something in Jaehyun that doesn’t sit right with the way Jaemin smiles.

Jaemin thinks of how he caused you, a loyal and faithful yet needy woman to go behind your husbands back and commit-

“For how long have you known her?” Jaehyun asks, when remembering how ‘Haera’s Husband’ called late at night on your phone. Late at night. Was that a normal thing between you and him? Did he normally call at that time, or was it unexpected also for you?

“Well your wife and my wife have been friends for a long time, but I recently met your wife. I’d say we hit it off well, in a platonic way. So that’s like a few weeks now, I’m practically damage control. Every time she’s in need, she calls me,” Jaemin chuckles looking back to Jaehyun hinting to the damage he caused. The choice of Jaemin’s words don’t sit well Jaehyun, especially if he’s only there to ‘comfort’ you. “She likes it rough…”

“Pardon?” Jaehyun gets ticked.

Jaemin’s head snaps up and he clears his throat shaking his head. “Hm? I said she has it rough, constantly being nagged by my wife. Always being alone and lonely.”

Jaehyun’s jaw locks when he hears Jaemin say the word ‘horny’ but it comes off as ‘lonely’. He could’ve sworn he also heard Jaemin say that you like it rough, before saying otherwise. It’s either his ears are messing with him or he’s not understanding Jaemin. “My wife has always been a tough woman. I trust that you’re misunderstanding your role as the husband to Haera. For all we know Haera may be projecting her insecurities of having a rough and lonely time unto my wife, so it’s best to check her instead of my wife. Now, if you’ll excuse me, let me check on my wife.” Jaehyun gets up without saying another word knowing all too well that he didn’t like the feelings arising in him. Heading for the diner door, Jaemin is left with one last glare from Jaehyun, the glare itself is filled with tension and Jaemin can feel it.

“Sir,” Jaemin clears his throat lightly. “Would you fire me for having a friendship with your wife?”

Friendship is harmless. But the one Jaemin is hinting at it, going about it subtly, only ticks Jaehyun off. He doesn’t look at Jaemin, but instead tries to calm himself down. “I don’t like mixing my work with my personal life. I’d fire you if you didn’t measure up to the high standards of my company. However,” Jaehyun turns his head around to meet Jaemin’s anticipation stare. “I’d appreciate it if you’d tend to your wife’s act of scandal and tamed her and you left mine alone. I’m here now, so you don’t need to be around to ‘comfort’ her anymore.” His words are firm and serious.

He’s here now. You don’t need to seek comfort in the arms of another. He won’t make the mistake of leaving you alone anymore. Taeyong was right in some way when he said that leaving you alone is scary. What types of people do you meet when he’s not around, and what the hell do they fill in your head?

Before he can pull the door open, you’re already pushing it open with four large brown paper bags of the diner’s logo. You’re holding 4 large brown paper bag takeaways looking surprised upon seeing Jaehyun by the door. He doesn’t waste a second longer, and instantaneously gets the load off your hands not minding the stern eyes of an angered Haera in the background. He’s so closed off and hooked on Jaemin’s words that he doesn’t notice the worry passing through your eyes when looking at him.

“I thought of getting the takeaway for us instead, was that okay?” You ask carefully.

“Good thinking.” Jaehyun holds the bags all in one hand and his other hand going down your spine resting at the beginning of your waist. “We should go,”

You draw closer to him, not making any eye contact with Jaemin nor Haera. Jaemin stands and bows his head noting that you guys weren’t gonna stay anymore. “Have a good day sir,”

Jaehyun’s jaw tightens but he tries not to show his slight irritation. “I want to see you. First thing tomorrow, in my office. In the morning.”

“Yes sir.”

And just like that, you fear that whatever Jaemin and he spoke about made him this way. As you’re both walking hand in hand around, you feel that the atmosphere has shifted completely. Whereby you and Jaehyun were practically talking about anything, it’s left with you talking alone while he glares wholes at anybody staring too long at you. You feel awful. You truly do. And when taking several rounds around the city you can tell that going home will be followed by some sort of discussion. Which is why you prepare for it by calming Jaehyun down by talking. You haven’t seen him angry or pissed in so long, but slowly as you sink into his arms when the Uber is going back home- you can feel his tight clutch on your arm. You can only wonder what thoughts are going through his head.

He’s so deep in his head that he doesn’t realize that you’re already home. Getting home, you notice his car along the curb of the mansion and can only guess that Taeyong has brought it back. Entering the house, you warm up the food preparing to eat the food from Taeil.

“What do you want to listen to?” Jaehyun asks bringing out his records. “Made the rounds around the basement and found these,”

“I hid them with the hopes that you wouldn’t find it,” You giggle just as he has a mischievous face.

“I’ll play this one. Let’s see what else you hid in the basement,”

Jaehyun seems to be in a (slightly) better mood because when he returns back to you in the kitchen, he begins chatting as if he wasn’t pissed off outside by Jaemin and every other guy that looked at you. He talks about how he should take regular breaks from work so that he can rest with you more often instead of leaving you alone and lonely. You don’t know where most of the topic is going but you go along with it, laughing, joking and eating and not trying to bring the tension. “You wanna take regular breaks from work?”

The question remains in the air for a long time. The silence, aside from the background music, has you worrying that you’ve probably said something wrong. Jaehyun continues to eat and drink on his wine and not even looking at you as if you didn’t say anything.

“Jae?”

“Mhm?”

“You said you’ll start taking regular breaks from work right?” You ask again, thinking he didn’t hear you. But just like before, he doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t answer. You blink several times and watch him devour the food. You let out a low chuckle and continue eating. “The food is really good,”

“It is,” He responds to that.

You’ve known him long enough to know that when he behaves extra clingy and doesn’t respond to certain questions that he somehow feels guilty- so you wonder why he’s feeling guilty all of a sudden, and about what.

For some reason thinking about how you left Jaemin to chat with him gives you chills that Jaemin could’ve said something to irk him. Because he looked angered when deciding to leave the pair at the diner. You’re curious to know, but not curious enough to turn the mood down, or cause an unnecessary argument.

So you ignore it.

The whole afternoon, Jaehyun doesn’t retreat to check on his work, instead he’s attached to your hip, literally. His hands in your hair when you’re not busy, his arms hanging around your waist when you’re working around, his head close to you at all times while he responds, listens and comments to everything you say.

You both end up being outside on the balcony of your room watching the sunset. Jaehyun rests his head against yours rubbing your sides humming to the songs playing in the background.

"I love Nakamoto Yuta so much. I'd do anything to have him play a private concert for me,"

Jaehyun laughs. "I still find his music weird,"

"You don't know music like I do," You laugh and roll your eyes.

"No, your music taste is weird," Jaehyun smiles and kisses your forehead suddenly. "I actually went to high school with him,"

"You keep saying that, but I don't believe you," You scoff. When the sun is no longer in the sky and the tiny little twinkling stars appear illuminating the night sky with extra wonder, you smile when a memory pops in your head. “This reminds me of our first date ever. Do you remember it?”

Jaehyun bites his lip with a smile forming on his lips. On that night, you were out camping with him (your ideal first date) and wanted to see the stars. He went out his way, to search for the best view just for you, which led the both of you standing above the mountain on an edged cliff whereby the stars were in arms reach. Jaehyun remembers how happy he was to have made you happy.

The view of your smile, of you opening up to him about your life, about moving out to peruse your passion for photography, because you always felt inspired by him and how hard he worked. It was on that night that he cherished you the most and made it his own person promise that he’d like to make you happy because you deserved the world.

Sadness comes upon him upon remembering Jaemin’s words. His arms slowly remove themselves from your waist in shame. He’s failed to keep you happy, and that makes him distant. You’ve been lonely and enduring so much all on your own. While he was out working, thinking that you’d enjoy the freedom and luxury he’d spoil you with… you were actually being comforted in another man’s arms while his wife spread disloyalty speech against him. Why did he lose track of his promises to be by your side?

His eyes humbly look up again and you both stare at the night serene peaceful view while hanging on the rail, you breathe out and turn your head to him when his smile is no longer on his face. You tilt your head and rest your arms on the rail watching him as his gaze on the view of the city lights below doesn’t seem to be in his mind, he seems preoccupied. “You okay?”

The silence that looms the atmosphere makes you stand up straight as you turn to him totally. He doesn’t say anything, nor does he look at you. He simply nods his head, his gaze now on the ground, with his hands in his black sweats as well as his head hanging down.

Not wanting to push him to talk you, you lay your hand on his bicep and walk in your room going to the joined bathroom. No sooner than later he slowly enters, meeting your eyes when looking into the mirror as you perform your night routine. He simply watches you, his eyes with hearts as he takes you in. You smile feeling flattered before mocking him for being hypnotized.

Walking into your room with him following behind after you’ve washed your face, you feel kind of relieved for Jaehyun not bringing up the inconvenient encounter with Haera and her husband and that the night will end smoothly. For you that’s a win.

Even better because when you sit on the edge of your bed, Jaehyun follows you. He bounces once, just as you bounce as well before you both chuckle. His hand carefully runs down your face, tucking your hair behind your ear. “I’m mesmerized by you again,” He shifts close to you. Your eyes sparkle with incredulity when he holds your face in his hands, his eyes, his dark brown eyes going over your face. Why is he always so mesmerized by you? “You’re so beautiful,”

“And you’re handsome,” You smile waiting for him to kiss you.

His head dips closer to you, his lips briefly touching yours once. He’s not in a rush, so you don’t attempt to quicken it. He tilts his head to the other side getting your lips in between his lips yet again. You close your eyes kissing him softly. No tongue, no force, just gleams of his soft peck. “I wanna ask you something,” He says between the kisses. “Who’s Jaemin to you?”

Your heart flutters causing you to instantly stop kissing Jaehyun. You clear your throat and move your head back trying to maintain your breathing from the harmless question. “He’s Haera’s husband,”

“I know that, but who is he to you?” His question presents itself as the first step to understanding what Jaemin’s parables meant.

“Why are you asking that?” You ask calmly. “He’s just Haera’s husband.” You answer again, feeling your tongue heated and heavy.

Jaehyun sets a hand behind his head while looking at you. “Has he come to our house before?”

“No.” You answer in a heartbeat before clearing your throat and shaking your head. “Why’re you asking?”

“Does he comfort you when you’re feeling lonely?” Jaehyun asks ignoring your question.

“Jae? I barely know him.” Your eyes reveal your confusion but you try to remain calm. In Jaehyun’s eyes, he picks up on all your little nervous reactions. He doesn’t want to draw conclusions on the relationship you have with Jaemin, but your reactions are causing his head to think otherwise. At first, his questions were to see if Jaemin was telling some sort of truth, but with your reactions he’s confused about your relationship with Haera’s husband.

“I just wanna know who you’re hanging out with,” Jaehyun speaks carefully with his eyes on you. “I’m barely around, so if you’re not getting comforted in your loneliness by me, it means you have a good friend in Jaemin. Right?”

You take a moment to understand the question and watch his reaction. “Honey, you can’t be jealous now.” You lightly smile, hoping to remove the fear in your heart. “But… I’m telling you now, whatever Jaemin said, don’t listen to him.”

“Okay,” Jaehyun gets his hand up lighting cupping your neck and massaging your neck. He gets close to you, his lips briskly kissing on your neck. “Do you feel distant with me?”

“No, honey never. I don’t even care how absent you are, as long as I’m with you, I always have a smile on my face,” You moan when his mouth is wrapped on a spot on your neck kissing, licking and biting all your well-known sweet spots. You hold onto his shoulder feeling, that his kisses are a little bit too hard. “Jae,”

“Are you after money?”

“Jae-ah,” You moan out when his hand gets on your covered boob and he squeezes on it causing you to gasp. His lips lingering over your open lips, touching, but not kissing, and it takes one glance of his eyes on you that you move in close to get a feel of his lips, but he moves back.

“No, you’ve always liked it traditional right. Just love, and my presence,” he gulps when looking into your eyes. They still look the same to him, your never ending eyes that were only for him. Glancing down at your body with his eyes, he lets’ go of your neck feeling hot after taking such actions without asking you. “Do you remember those days that you used to come over at my workplace?” He whispers but still gets close to you and kisses your lips. His lips are hot, soft, settling, nibbling and gasping- you find yourself in the same state pulling onto each other for more and when you stop, you have his eyes closed, heavily exhaling, hair ruffled, and he looks like the prettiest mess ever.

But if you look closely, you see some form of insecurity laying over him. So you plant your lips on him. “Can we talk about you acting strange?” You whisper between the kisses.

“Why’d you stop coming to visit me at work?” He asks, regardless of your question. You hum in remembrance parting from the kiss when he slowly moves back.

You lay your body sideways on the bed, while he lays flat and turns his head to you. His lips are slightly puffy and his hair is slowly forming into curly messes with your hands running over them.

Your eyes wander around his dainty analytic face. He’s got bags underneath his eyes, but they’re not heavy as before. His eyes remind you of the times when your hands were always on his hair to make him feel better, of the times he’d spend so much time with you, and attend to work during the late hours and would wake up with a headache but still go to work and then come home and instead of finishing up on work, he’d spend all his time with you before doing his work late in the night.

You shrug your shoulder when making your eyes move back to his. “You’re working at work. I felt like I was distracting you. Day in and day out, I was too clingy. You stopped sending me messages too, so I felt like a bother. I didn’t want to get in between you and work…” You mumble getting quieter, knowing that the truth would not be nice to be said out. “You practically started living in your office.” You say. It hits a nerve inside of you to say this, but you know that this is the discussion that you were waiting for in anticipation. Besides, when else will you get the time to talk to him like this when he starts going back to work again. “I didn’t want to disturb anymore,”

“You’re my first priority at all times. Not work. If you say you want me here, I’ll be here,”

You try not to roll your eyes knowing that even if it seems true, it’s not. “Jae, I just don’t want to disturb you-”

“I made a vow to you. It’s not like I would ignore you and continue working. All that I do-”

“Yeah, I know. All that you do, you do it for me.” You mumble out kind of bitterly but still keep a calm demeanor. “But clearly, work comes first because for you to do anything for me it would require money right? Hence the trips you make me go on, the brand deals designer collections you always get for me, or even always filling up my account, to show me that you’re doing all this for me,”

“Are you upset about that?” His eyes squint in hurt.

“No,” You instantly say assuring him you’re fine. You breath out through your mouth. “It’s just, I wish that you didn’t…you didn’t put me in such a position whereby I’d be a motivation for you to work harder. I mean, don’t get me wrong honey but… I mean, it's not like I cared about all of those things in the first place. I only wanted you.”

“And I’ve given you me-”

“No, you’ve spoilt me with your riches and success. I guess it’s okay, but it’s the fact that I’m doing all those things alone and you’re working. Jae I need you, not all those promises you made me. I needed you, not the vows."

Jaehyun's eyes that are on yours seem so hallow yet you can tell that your words are hitting him. He leans on in his elbow, his eyes never leaving your saddened eyes. “Were you really lonely?” He asks softly.

You flatter your eyes to the wall behind, not wanting to fight even a little. Your ears go back to him and you nod your head. “What kind of question is that? You know I’ve been missing you like crazy. And I know you're working extremely hard, but why did it always have to be so hard even to see you? I hardly saw you during the days and on the weekends you were either on a business trip or in the office. So of course I’ve been lonely. This house is so big and I’m always alone when I wake up,” You whisper looking into his eyes. “I don’t know how you do it, but no amount of work can make me get over how lonely I’ve been feeling for years. Feeling you at night when you come back is reassuring to me, but waking up without seeing you feels like a constant loop of loneliness. Did you really think I'd be okay?"

"I honestly thought you'd be." His hand comes on top of your shoulder and he lightly massages it. He pulls himself closer so that you’re both close by an inch. Jaemin was right, you had it ‘rough’. “Y/n, I promised you a good life, vacations, world tours, the biggest events, the whole world at the palm of your hand. I promised you that you’d be smiling whenever, I promised tha-"

You shake your head and exhale out. "No more promises Jae, no." He looks in between both your eyes, and you can see the fear in them. You breathe out showing a little smile even though it doesn't reach your eyes. "You're going back to work tomorrow. Just kiss me for tonight, be here right now with me. Let me feel you, let me cherish you. Kiss me Jaehyun. Just kiss me, I’ve missed you and I want you,"

He kisses instantly and deeper at that request- as if all the talking was just a hindrance and all he wanted was you. However in Jaehyun's head, the guilt sips into his conscious and he asks himself if really he took it too far. Working instead of being with you.

The thought itself angers him because he upset you. Remembering Jaemin's words about how you liked it 'rough' - his hand slides down to grip your thigh, spreading your legs a bit wider so that he can settle fully between them. And as all of him is lined up with you, you're left gasping for air by the kiss that gets rougher and rougher. He's licking, sucking, messing with your tongue before he leaves one big lip pulling kiss and sloppily downs on your neck leaving you panting and breathing. Jaehyun tears himself away from the continuous hickey he’s been giving you, his mouth treading kisses to your jaw, your neck, your ear.

You're trembling, not with fear but with want as Jaehyun breathes your name over and over onto your skin. Like a prayer, that emits how your name sounds on his lips. The fast paced kisses tagged with Jaehyun's equally fast moving hands as he unclips your bra from underneath your shirt, he removes your bottoms and sits up (still with his lips attached to your neck, leaving you moaning at the forming hickey) dragging your body close to him as he spreads your legs wider pounding you straight to him.

You gasp and open your eyes, your hands immediately take his face into your hands. Finding his eyes blazing, his breathing ragged as your own- you try to catch your breath wondering why's he being so rough with you? You just asked him to kiss you and be with you…not dominate over you.

He dares to run his fingers from your back all the way up to removing your shirt and bra in the process. You're flustered when seeing your nearly naked under his grasp. You slide your hand down his check, right beneath the collar of his shirt. His skin is like heated silk, he shudders at the touch, head bowing so that his inky black hair spills forward blocking your view of his face.

Jaehyun always asked.

But this time when he grips your ass and stares back into your eyes while strutting his sweats down a little before parting your thong and his hips drive into yours just enough that a lewd gasp comes out of you. It's the more, you realize, that you want more of him… More of him when he doesn't ask but takes it from you.

"Jae," you throw your head back and moan out the more he thrusts into you. His thrusts are a bit slow but each one is impactful. When he sees how you're enjoying it and not worried about if he's hurting you or not- something comes over him, be it anger, disappointment that he can't get Jaemin's stupid words out his head, whatever comes over him causes him a low growl as he pins your body into him and does as you say.

He takes from you in the roughest way possible when all of a sudden his thrusts are on fire and his speed shots rocket high his skin pounding into you mercilessly. He figures it's the anger he felt at the diner with Jaemin. He grips onto your flesh and bounces you in an insane way onto his cock that gets rougher causing your clit to tighten as you feel your stomach bubbling with release. "Jae, slowly-" You stop talking shutting your eyes heavily. Your words hardly reach his ears. Jaehyun wants you to stop talking and in a flash his lips are on you again. Your hands that are tight on his biceps squeeze on tightly when he seems hypnotized by the lust.

His other hand runs up you back pressing you harder against his chest. You taste like the wine sunrise that you came from drinking and the sweetness that makes his head swim with thirst. He sucks into your tongue dictating over you. Your mouth opened up, lips parted as you try to catch up with him, but you're unable. He was never one to explore, but you're astonished in shock how he doesn't leave your mouth unexplored.

Every part of him wants to wrap around you. It's like all the dirty desires he once had about you begin to enlighten in this moment that he doesn't hear a word you say. "You like to rough don't you." Is the only words that leave his lips when his thrusts are never gentle, like before.

Jaehyun closes his eyes burying his head on your chest tightly holding onto you. He couldn't believe how you really liked it in the beginning and urged him to go on. You were never like this so what corrupted your thoughts? Could it be because he hasn't been home for so long that now you were sex deprived and wanted it rough? And that you were never really lonely but instead horny… And Jaemin comforted you by-

"No!" Jaehyun's cock is deeply into your belly even though you've long cummed and are now begging him to stop he doesn't hear and they're tears by your eyes. "Jaehyun please!"

Your hands are now in his hair trying to pull him away. Now you know that Jaemin definitely said something and messed with his head. Because when your thighs are sweaty and shaking against him again when you erupt in cum squirting he still doesn't stop gaping at your whole with his steel like dick.

You wanted to make this a special kiss, make every touch from him be as one that you'd crave, because you didn't want to think of Jaemin. You scream when the fourth orgasm comes and Jaehyun doesn't stop.

"Jaehyun stop!" You cry out holding onto his shoulders. "It hurts!"

Jaehyun's head snaps to yours immediately stopping Jaemin's thoughts from his head when he sees you crying and panting with your pulse pounding in your veins. He looks into your eyes. You look back into his, shell shocked like he just dropped a bomb in the center of the room. Neither of you say anything as you stare intensely into each other’s eyes. Yours with tears and his with much distress.

Jaehyun's thoughts are foggy when watching the cum pool from your cunt and onto his hard dick. He's instantly up on his feet- his member as hard as a rock and your legs trembling with your pussy egging out and dripping in cum.

You can only hold in your tears and stare up into his eyes filled with horror. You try to collect your legs but they're straining in pain from how Jaehyun turned rogue. He doesn't look into your eyes again as he turns to the washroom and locks himself inside.

Another type of guilt sips into him. He turns on the cold water and removes his clothes getting inside groaning out by the coldness of the little droplets of the ice cold water the moment it touches his dick. What the hell did he just do?

Meanwhile, you're swarmed in guilt for perhaps pushing him too far. What was that? Regardless after composing yourself and the pain in you lower abdomen and legs are manageable, you clean yourself up with some wipes that are on your bed side and you ignore that you have no bra on or shirt when you work around your room.

You remove the bedsheets that are stained with your pools of sticky cum and you go into the laundry room a few doors down and place the sheets into the washer leaving it to wash. You also remove your thong tossing it inside and are now left naked and guilty.

Upon returning to your room you still hear the shower go on. You put on your silk night dress and get out a new set of layers of sheets and tuck them on the bed, before getting on it and resting your body down. You close your eyes and sigh out.

“No more promises,” Your eyes snap open by the whisper in your ear. You realize you fell asleep and the room is now in darkness. A pair of arms are on you and you know it's Jaehyun as he sips his warmth into you. He continues to whisper. “From now on, drop by whenever you want. Send me messages whenever. I’ll always answer. Stay with me at the office longer, tell me to come home immediately when you need me, pressure me to leave everything behind for you- because I’m telling you the truth when I say I’m here now. I won’t leave you alone ever again. I won't let you be lonely. I know I’ve been an absent husband to you, but I can promise… No promises, so I'll make sure to get it right this time. C-can you forgive me?”

You lay your head back on his chest closing your eyes. You cling onto his arms around you tightly.

"I'm sorry for tonight… I was out of it. I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you."

You quietly breath out and nod your head.

Jaehyun wants you to say something, you don’t speak at all. He sinks down when remembering your words. "You're not a distraction to me honey. You’re my wife, I shouldn't have ignored your desires."

“Jae, it’s okay.” You hum out lightly. “You’ve got work in a few hours. You need to rest.”

•

"Sir it's 12 o'clock, you've got an appointment with the factory production manager at 12h45."

Jaehyun snaps out of his thoughts when glancing up to his secretary Chae-won who stands by the door.

"If you leave now you'll reach there in about 30 minutes."

"Are they already finished making the test samples?" He asks quietly going over the papers on his desk wondering why he's not focused- they did tell him that they'd be finish before the afternoon. Everything on his table looks like a blur of work and he clears his throat feeling uncomfortable by his unkempt desk and non-professional like behavior. He gets up and searches around his desk. "Where are they?"

"Sir are you looking for the factory documents?" Chae-won asks finding it strange how Jaehyun is so out of it. "You gave Mr Na Jaemin the documents to be processed this morning." She looks to her watch just as Jaehyun remembers his faint discussion with Jaemin. "He should be here by… There he is."

Jaehyun picks up his phone and tells his driver to get ready for him downstairs. "Chae-won stay here for today. I think my wife might come in. If she doesn't come just stay in my office until I get back. Oh yes, in case she comes before I’m back, there are some roses I bought this morning on the couch with a card. If you could hand it to her and make her feel comfortable, I’d be glad." The little smile on Jaehyun’s face comes out naturally when talking about you, that his heart hurts all over again thinking about how he went overboard and your silent treatment to him. “I’ll be going now.”

"Yes sir." Chae-won watches Jaehyun walk out his office with nothing but his phone. Jaemin stops with a smile and then follows Jaehyun towards the elevators.

-

Chae-won prior to what Jaehyun said is seated in her office typing out the rest of Jaehyun’s completed task on the company portal. Focused on her work not bothered by anything else, she’s alert a little when her desk phone rings. Picking up the call, she waits for the caller. “Ma’am, there’s a lady here claiming to be Mr Jung’s wife.”

Hearing the words Chae-won’s eyes marvel. “Oh, yes send her up.”

“Are you sure?”

“Mr Jung informed me of her presence himself, yes send her up.” Chae-won ends up cutting the call seemingly finding herself getting excited. She quickly gets up and fixes her attire making sure she looks presentable. Fixing the perm on her hair she quickly walks into Jaehyun’s office, walking through the large space and going down some steps before reaching to the little set area where there are four large couches and a table in the center with the view being the city being displayed by the top to bottom glass wall.

Her eyes marvel at the little set up when noticing that Jaehyun prepared for his wife’s arrival. She picks up the bouquet of white and pink roses wrapped in a beautiful black drape with card multiple of hand written cards, she walks out his office and makes her way to the elevators. She waits and prepares her best smile. When Taeyong spoke about Jaehyun’s wife he had such high admiration for her and words filled with love that Chae-won was jealous at how Taeyong seemed to talk about Jaehyun’s wife for an entire car ride. Not only Taeyong, but her own boss is head over hills for her. From the little that she’s seen, Jaehyun is easily flattered by his wife not only by phone calls, but also at the mention of her name. So of course she has no high expectations but she wants to see the lady that’s captured her boss’s heart. The lady who made the little ‘holiday’ possible for the entire company.

Meanwhile, downstairs when waiting for the elevator you’re enchanted by how everything in Jaehyun’s whole company has changed. The last time you were in the company, it only had 20 floors- but now it’s stacked up high with 40 floors. The exterior of the whole company is designed in such a sophisticated and elegant black view with the logo of a perfume bottle being the main visual. The interior is even more jaw dropping that you get lost just upon entering. “Wow,” Not only is the renovation impressive with cyberpunk aesthetics and classy modern day color themes of black and white, brown and white, grey and white, silver and white, blue and white, but the dress code and fashion of the workers and people in the company is to die for. All the colors and proud workers walking around make you feel intimidated. They walk with poise and stern confidence, they’re dressed in elegant colors, all the ladies in heels and tight fitting work attires, all the guys in suit pants of dark colors and buttoned up shirts or even blazers and shirts. It’s absolutely stunning to see how much has changed, you last remembered everyone wearing jeans and a simple theme of blue was the highlight of everything, however now, everything is classy.

Jaehyun really did this? At this point, you believe that even if Haera had to bad mouth Jaehyun, you wouldn’t believe it. Because really, he’s been working at his hardest.

The front desk lady tells you to press the last floor to head straight to Jaehyun’s office floor. Getting in one of the transparent elevators by choice, your eyes are large in astonishment and awe that you don’t mind the people that enter and leave the elevator. You’re confused though when you notice that the elevator stops at the fifth floor- the fifth being the last on this elevator. Upon getting out, you look around to the fifth floor which is almost like a garden as it’s plastered in such green serene vegetation. Of course it’s barricaded by large glass walls that encase the indoor garden with sun radiation lights and sprinkles of rain water from above. Not wanting to waste time, you pick up your basket and walk closer to the walls trying to find another elevator.

Your ears perk upon hearing your name being called, but you remain frozen in spot when you know exactly who’s calling you. You ignore the voice and continue walking hoping to get far without an encounter from the-

“Hey,” You feel your wrist being held forcing you to turn and face Jaemin. “What’re doing here?”

His face brightens up when seeing you, that his thumb on your wrist begins to carefully caress your hand. You pull your hand out gently and tuck your hair before clearing your throat, focusing more on your hands then his face. “I’m here to see my husband. If you don’t mind,” You promptly walk passed him taking slightly bigger strides.

“What’s with the attitude?” Jaemin charismatically scoffs before gripping your hand again and pulling you towards him. You stop yourself from colliding into his body by placing your hand on his bare chest…well his shirt is unbuttoned revealing just a piece of his crafted chest. You clear your throat

“Jaemin get out of my way please,” You hold your ground strongly giving him one serious stare.

“I don’t want to,” Jaemin playfully chimes.

“I’m not here for you,” You try backing up, but he steps closer holding onto your wrist tightly.

The pleasantly playful smile doesn’t leave his lips as his eyes are fixed on yours. “What’s got your panty in a twist? Are you pissed off? Do you want some relief?”

“Fuck, Jaemin.” Your eyes snap up to his as you shush him by placing your finger over his mouth getting upset. “Can you not do that here? Please.” You beg in frustration through your teeth.

Jaemin, not hearing a damn word you say, holds onto your finger that’s on his lips and kisses it. “Why’re you so mad? Did something happen?” His eyes go over your black fitting pants and large black buttoned shirt. “Are you really here for your husband?”

You break out of his grip stepping back in annoyance. “Yes.”

“Okay,” He smiles and places his hands in his pocket. “Where are you headed? To his office?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll take you there,”

Instead of using the glass elevator you’re led to a row set of elevators. Jaemin looks behind to make sure that you’re following behind him. Upon reaching the 4th elevator that opens up Jaemin’s fingers double taps on the 40th floor. Once the doors close, you keep to yourself, your eyes on the number board above counting up as you go up each floor.

“You brought him lunch?”

You nod your head not turning to him.

Jaemin looks into the basket again noticing you brought a bunch of treats and packet sized lunch. “Damn, he eats a lot doesn’t he?”

You ignore him, internally sighing that the elevator is going fast but is still around the 10th floors. “How long till we get to the 40th floor?”

Jaemin chuckles. “An hour.”

You pray that he’s joking, but nonetheless you don’t engage in his sarcastic comments.

“I’m finding it hard you came here for him. I think, after finding out I work here you came to see with your own eyes,” Jaemin mumbles out again, you can hear him getting off his corner and moving softly towards you. You don’t budge, even though you really want to. You remain in place when he gets in front of you and pats your head. “I could be tooting my own horn, but I’ve never really seen you here before. Mm, you smell good. Now it makes sense why you always smelt like the boss. You use his perfumes don’t you.”

20th floor. You internally groan.

“I guess I should be thanking you for the free meal. The chef Moon Taeil, allowed us to eat for free,” Jaemin whispers with a low smile, before his smile disappears. “Why’re you so upset? Did you piss off your husband? Is that why you’re here, to make up?”

You shake your head but stop mid-way and face him. “Actually, now that you’re on the topic. What the hell did you tell Jaehyun yesterday?”

Jaemin thinks for a second, a smile growing on his face. “What do you mean?”

“He wasn’t himself when we got home.” You barely go further in explanation but Jaemin reads your face.

“What, the sex wasn’t good?” He asks out of a hunch. “If anything, I didn’t tell him how to satisfy you- so you can’t blame me if he was bad at pleasing you. Did he fuck you the wrong way-”

“Shut up.” You roll your eyes. “Now tell me, what did you say to him?”

Jaemin’s hand reaches for your waist and by an instant, he gets both his hands on your waist spinning you around and lightly backs you up against the elevator. Your eyes widen wide as your basket drops from your hand. He smiles when he has you trapped in him. With his strong grip on your wrist, his other hand pins both your hands above your head leaning down with a smirk as he kisses your neck. “What the hell Jaemin-”

“You’re stressed and I’m trying to make you feel good- I can make you feel better then him. Even after giving him a hint that you like it rough, he still makes you so tight?”

Gathering your pent up frustrated strength- you push on him with all your might and glare at him. “Don’t touch me.” You blurt out through clinched teeth. “Just because you and I fucked doesn’t mean that you’re suddenly my husband. How dare you? You’re just a man I had sex with while my husband was away, stop acting as though you’re mine. You are nothing to me other than my best friend's husband. Know your place.” You warn.

In all your out bursts Jaemin's solely lifts up his eyebrow with a stern face. "Is that so?" His head tilts to the side as he loses his smirk and his tongue pokes against his cheek. "You’re right, I'm just the husband to your best friend." As if not believing your words he replays the whole conversation in his head before he clinching his jaw. "Okay." He sighs out and adjusts his clothes and stands back into his corner, his eyes going away completely from you and to the elevator wall.

The rest of the elevator ride is silent. If you knew it'd take putting your foot down to get him to shut up then you would've put your foot down a long time ago. You don't say anything and he doesn't say anything, he retreats to the side and faces the elevator door now watching the floors, you pick up your basket and try to calm down from your heated anger.

It takes a really long while, but once the floor reaches the 40th floor you find yourself praising the heavens. The door opens and Jaemin stretches his hand out. You don't look at him but step out minding your own business. Your own business being met with a lady in a black beautiful knee dress holding a bouquet of white and pink roses. A smile lights itself on your face when an instant memory comes to your mind.

The white and pink roses reminding you of the day you got married. The theme was cream and a faded pink. Back then Jaehyun wasn't as heavily pocket rich and barely had enough to host an entire wedding, but you made ends meet by getting a really charming wedding planner who made everything work. Everything was plastic, second hand and fake, yet it all came out to beautifully. Nobody could tell the difference except you, the wedding planner and Jaehyun.

The most memorable part of your wedding night were the rare type of roses. Jaehyun had picked them out and on each and every rose stem he wrote such pure and heartfelt words that made you cry.

So seeing the roses again, you're reminded of all his wonderful messages. Come to think of it, everything he mentioned in the cards come to life, not only the prosperity and riches but how his feelings never changed from you. He's still so hell bent on pleasing you.

Taking in the flowers with such warm and loving hands, you coo and giggle as though the bouquet is a little child. "It's so beautiful," You hum out in bliss and turn to greet the lady before you.

"Good day ma'am. My name is Chae-won. I'm Mr Jung Jaehyun's secretary. He apologized for his late coming, however he did say that you should make yourself comfortable. If you can please follow me here," Chae-won bows her head before leading you along the corridor into office- all the while as her brain works at rapid speed to try and match your face to someone she's met before. She swears she's seen you before, but where…

Getting in the office, you can't stop staring and being so impressed by every little inch and detail of architectural work as well as the placement and digest of each ornament. Not to mention how spectacular the view is.

"He's such a dummy." You smile sadly. "Now, I'll definitely feel like I'm disturbing him. Where is he by the way?"

And that's how she manages to get a whiff and look at you. It's when you look down with a sad smile does she remember a lunch break she had with Mark -who invited two strangers to eat with. You're the lady who has a CEO husband who cheats on you! Her eyes widen and she covers her mouth. As she's about to defend her boss, her mouth completely seizes when remembering how Jaemin had his hand underneath the table somehow pleasing you.

Your reactions.

She can't forget your face and how you looked. Erotically pleased. You were almost squirming in your seat the same way she squirms when Taeyong touches her in his car. You could barely speak, you kept your head down biting your lip as you flinched in your seat from time to time letting out low sounds- Chae-won remembers how disgusted she was because you were seemingly doing it in public with your best friend’s husband, with no shame.

However, upon looking at you, you look daring and fierce yet so fragile and innocent like you’d never ever take advantage of Jaehyun’s kindness. If Chae-won had seen Jaehyun perhaps when he was in his chubby youth days then perhaps she would say that you looked out of his league- but, knowing what she knows now about how you and Jaemin could’ve been entangled in something she feels almost disappointed in you.

You on the other hand can’t read minds, but you watch as her face falls from happiness to shock to confusion all together being dissatisfied. She shakes her head and clears her throat. “Uhm, Mr Jung said you could lounge here until he got back. He’s gone to the factory producers to smell some test sample scents. Hopefully he should be back around 2pm.”

You nod your head looking at the clock on the wall. “It’s quarter to, so that should be soon enough. I should probably open these,”

You turn around and squat down by the table level begin to unpack the basket filled with different types of snacks. Seeing as you’re working, Chae-won notes to herself that she never sees Jaehyun eating when he’s at work.

“So, what does he normally eat when here?” You ask. “I warned him about his blood pressure and salt and he tells me he just drinks his protein shakes.”

“To be honest,” Chae-won folds her arms not wanting to talk about Jaehyun to you who is a cheater. But knowing that she has no say or right to make such accusations she speaks. “I’ve never seen Mr Jung eat or drink anything. He’s practically working on his desk all day, all afternoon, all night. He only gets up to stretch his legs or use his personal washroom or ever make phone calls. But I’ve never really seen him eat,”

Your eyes widen and you turn your head back to Chae-won in shock- who points to the frequent places that Jaehyun is at. When she points to her office that’s in another room, the glass wall show that if he moved off his desk to a certain spot she’d be able to see everything he’s doing in there. You shake your head.

“Can I ask you something Mrs Jung,” You get flustered by that name but still hum out, still setting up the table of different meals and the treats you know he likes. “Does he eat when he gets home?”

You breathe in and nod your head. “I make sure to prepare a big meal for him when he gets back.” You shrug your shoulders. “Of course I’m always asleep when he gets back home, but I leave his food in the microwave covered in bowls. I know he eats them all because he never leaves a single bowl full- he finishes everything and washes his plates after.”

“You sleep when he gets back?”

Feeling judged, you take a seat on the chair next to the secretary and look out to the view of the city that’s heavily adorned by towers of different shapes and sizes and lengths and logo’s all being so radiant. “I used to wait up for him…in the living room or my room. But me being the heavy sleeper I am, I’d always wake up when the sun would be up again, but instead of being in the living room where I last slept, I always find myself in our room. Sometimes I find that I’m changed and covered in the blanket. So I sleep in the living room and find myself in our room. At some point he gave me the green light to just sleep and not wait up for him because he joked that I’m heavy when going up the stairs,”

“Oh that’s cute,” Chae-won laughs a little and you smile. Judging by the size of your house she can imagine how long the stairs are. Not only does he finish late, but he’s probably starving and sees his wife passed out on the couch. “If you ask me, I never knew Mr Jung had a soft spot. He was always my highly intellectual superior boss, one wrong move and he’d threaten to demote me. But after that day where he finished early to get back home to his wife, you, I started seeing him differently. Almost like a family man,”

Chae-won’s words make you stop for a second as you try to think of when he’s come home early- you visibly freeze in your seat remembering that it was the first encounter with Jaemin. You shake your head and gulp going back to organizing the table while Chae-won talks about how amazing Jaehyun is. About how focused he is, how he’s a perfectionist and wants nothing less than perfect. You’re even shocked when Chae-won mentions that he’s never smiles in the work place, and that the only time she’s seen him smile was when talking about you.

That even makes you feel all the worse about what you’ve done behind his back. Sitting down on the long couch keeping you company, Chae-won watches as you set out all the little foodie items before assisting you in making it look presentable. You're very sharp and detailed orientated. She's kind of jealous of how you look and how you emit such radiant energy….but behind closed doors you’re a cheater. Hearing her work telephone ring, she snaps back and stands. “I should get back to work, I’m sure Mr Jung will be back.”

“No problem, I’ll wait here for him,” You smile nervously. “I hope he won’t be mad,”

Chae-won shakes her head with an honest gleam in her eyes. Aside from your dirty habit with Jaemin, you did look like you loved and appreciated the man you love- it’s what Chae-won sees. “Trust me, today he was really spaced out and simply looking out the window. I think he’s really motivated to have you here,”

“You’re so kind,” You bow your head and quickly pick up a little sealed bag with some pastry that you baked this morning and present it to here. “Here, have this. For your hard work and assisting him. Thank you very much.”

Feeling touched by your generosity and kindness Chae-won accepts the little bag and smiles. “Thank you Mrs Jung,” It’s not long before she walks up the few steps and walks towards the door.

She wants to say one more thing, but looking through the glass door she notes the elevator door opening up and seeing Jaehyun walk out all poised and stern with Johnny and Taeyong walking beside him. Shoot. She breathes out and quickly looks back to you, hoping to get one more saying in- before she attends to her boss and his guests.

"One more thing Mrs Jung." Chae-won turns her head to look at you. "I know it’s not my place to say this but… Please don't believe your friend and everything she says about Jaehyun. He's never once cheated and I can testify on that. So, with all respect, I ask on his behalf, that you stop fooling around his back. He’s a good man. He doesn’t deserve you screwing behind his back." Chae-won's words are final and sharp, yet her stare is empathetic leaving you feeling as though a ton of bricks has fell on you.

You don’t react but simply stand still and watch her walk out. How did she know?

You can't even be in shock when a few seconds later the door is opened up and in walks your husband- whom you feel so guilty towards- and two-

"Y/n?" That's Taeyong, who's eyes blossom at the sight of you. "You're still banging like this? How have you been?" Taeyong with smiles makes his way towards you just as Jaehyun grips the back of Taeyong's blazer pulling him back.

"Goodbye Taeyong." Jaehyun can't even contain the excitement he's feeling when seeing you that he clears his throat to compose his serious face when looking at Johnny. "I think you can go ahead in the negotiation room with Taeyong. Make sure they don't accept the proposal to start investments. I can't have Mr Zhong win the bidding wars."

"Wait but what if they bring the money in cash-"

"Then bid higher." Jaehyun, still holding onto Taeyong's blazer tightly so that he can't escape, now begins to push Johnny out his office. "You know the drill."

"We know the drill, but the question is how much is the limit. It's reckless throwing all that money to a project that hasn't yet began," Taeyong comments.

You find it comical how Jaehyun frustratingly attempts to get the two out but they stand firm and question him. "Why do I have to be the brains of everything? Why the hell do you think I said you should make sure that no one in the high up committee should accept the proposal? Find loop holes in the project, pick on everything that looks remotely close to suspicion-"

"You know that's not even remotely close to our assigned positions. We're not good at picking holes with the higher up- that's your job." Taeyong deadpans before folding his arms. "Wait, are you leaving us two alone in that meeting? You fucking can't be serious, Mr Zhong and those Chinese and Japanese bidders always come fucking prepared to devour us-"

"Not only that, have you seen the launch of committee members? Sir you seriously can't leave us," Johnny looks stunned. "You're leaving the fate of this company in our hands? I mean I'm good at settling the scores between outside companies, but against Mr Zhong and his team? Sir sending us alone will be sending your company into the hands of the Chinese and Japanese."

"Exactly!" Taeyong agrees.

"Your heads will be on the chopping block if Mr Zhong so lays a hand on my company. I'll fire everyone in your-"

"With all due respect sir, but this fate is best left in your hands. You know Mr Zhong won't wait to tear us limb from limb, we practically sent him off the market with our recent new releases. He's not coming to play this time."

Jaehyun runs his hands through his hair and groans and peeks at you for a second. The look in his eyes says it all, he wants to be with you. But hearing the debate going on between the guy Johnny and Taeyong, you know it's really serious. "Babe, why don't you go with them? I'll still be here when you come back,"

That brightens up his mood when he mutters out apologetically. "Really?"

Johnny is stunned by the change of demeanor his boss has, from cold to soft in a matter of seconds. "Oh shit. Were we being cock blocks for you-"

"No, it's okay," You immediately assure and smile at them. "Uhm-"

"Wait outside." Jaehyun's voice is stern and seriously directed at the two men. "Now."

Taeyong smirks and chuckles lightly before winking at you. "It's a pleasure seeing you. You haven't aged a day since college. You still take my breath away-"

"Get out." Taeyong jumps a little by Jaehyun's words and laughs a little while walking out.

"We've barely got 5 minutes so make it quick." Taeyong winks and walks out with Johnny, who smiles in your direction before following Taeyong.

Jaehyun shakes his head passing one last irritated look at Taeyong before turning to you. Despite his smile being small, it still reaches his eyes and he almost gets shy when drawing closer to you. Standing right in front of you having his eyes being captivated by your beauty he slightly bends down to give your lips a light peck. “I was thinking you weren’t gonna come,”

You smile shyly and take a step closer just as his hands wrap around your waist to bring you closer to him. “It felt right coming to see you. I mean, I might not come next time because it’s evident that you’re working, but I’ll make sure to drop by occasionally. Especially if I miss you,” Your words fade to a whisper when you lean in and plant a kiss on his lips while holding onto his chest. “You should eat before going into your meeting, I heard you barely eat when you’re working.”

“Eat?” He smiles lightly peeking his head behind you to get a look at the table. “You really came prepared to spend time with me,”

“Come on,” You lead him to the presentable meal and you take a seat right next to him. “Oh yeah, I love the new construction you’ve placed around the building, they really stand out.”

Jaehyun rolls his sleeves up with a smirk as he picks up the chopsticks. “Modifications were needed at the time, and I didn’t want to purchase a new building and relocate, or even design and construct a new building because essentially this place is perfect in the economy, it’s literally close to the center. Besides, constructing a new building would mean consulting an architect, planning for designs and drawings, a lot of costs would need to be done from materials to be used to cement- not to mention it would be tough looking for any type of land without being too far from the busy city life and on top of that documentation takes a really long time, and getting it approved takes even longer. So enhancing and reforming the building suited my thinking back then. It would be a waste to sell this building and start from scratch, so might as well adjust it.” He plucks a crispy shrimp in his mouth and smiles at me. “It’s delicious, say ah,”

You open my mouth as he dips the fresh shrimp inside some sauce and places it inside your mouth.

Spending the little amount of time with Jaehyun feels really satisfying with your heart being content by how nothing seems awkward after the previous night. In fact, everything is going smooth with Jaehyun talking and leading the conversation engaging in how he wants you to broaden your business and make it more versatile and within an office block instead of virtual and online and at home. The way he’s talking, only brings you back to the days of how you’d admire him when he spoke.

He is undeniably an intelligent man, with a preserved mind. He takes care of all your needs with integrity and wisdom. He loves you so much and it’s evident in the way he talks to you and how he wants you to perform more and achieve your own goals. He even almost dumbs himself down to speak to you. Not that you’re dumb, but after hearing his business thoughts, you can’t help but wonder how much of an intellectual man he is outside of talking to you. He’s influential and has all the right rights in place…so how could you have possibly thought about cheating when he cares so much for?

You’re so overwhelmed with emotions that when he takes the last bites of the rice cake, your hand lays on his firm thigh getting his attention. “I just, want to let you know that I love you. I know I said a lot of things last night, but all that matters is that you matter to me. It still feels like we’re in our honeymoon phase, but really I still love you so much and love how you always think of me,” Your heart beats fast when there’s clarity and peace washing over his eyes. Unlike your guilty eyes, Jaehyun is imbedded into you.

“I love you more,” Jaehyun leans in and you hold the side of his face as you both dive in for a kiss. It’s supposed to be simple, yet Jaehyun doesn't stop kissing you and easily causes you to lower your body with his hand guiding you down onto the couch. You moan into the kiss tilting your head when he adjusts himself in his position getting you to open your legs and guide them around him.

"Babe, you have to go," You mutter in the kiss rubbing his shoulders calming down from the kiss. You sense a pair of eyes on you, but you try not to mind it only focusing your eyes on Jaehyun’s hair as he now has his head against your shoulder flattering little kisses.

"Just a little bit more."

You giggle when he switches your position getting you off the couch and onto his lap. He spreads his legs having his hands politely moving over your hips while you sit on him. "We're being watched Jae," You breathe out in his ear moaning when his hands squeeze your butt in his grasp. His tongue circling around a certain spot on your neck which he’s marked. You’re on edge when his teeth sink and giving you a hickey. Closing your eyes and controlling your breathing as he sucks your neck off as well as continuously groping your ass. While mounting you closer onto his manhood.

Unconsciously your hands run down his neck unbuttoning his shirt and unfastening his tie. It motivates him to ride his hands against your torso and going to your shoulders to easily unbutton the first few buttons and pull down your shirt and the strings of your bra, giving his hands something to grope on. He pants out when having his eyes fixed on your full chest, his hands probing tightly. You grin when he sinks his head in between your breasts rubbing his face on them. His fingers gently unbuttoning your shirt. You take it upon yourself to plant your hands on his shoulders as you rake yourself on his heavy poking bulge.

“Do you wanna make a baby with me?”

You’re stunned by the muffled question, but not entirely surprised… okay, no, you’re surprised. “Baby? As in infant depending on both parents to be present in its time of living? You wanna make a baby with me?” Your grinding becomes faster as you practically dry hump him feeling his member having its own heartbeat and poking uncontrollably. “Fuck Jae,” You moan throwing your head back.

A light buzz catches you off guard making you bounce in jitter on Jaehyun- earning a moan from him, with him bucking his hips up once in your core.

“I’m sorry sir to intrude.” The voice of his secretary plays on the little intercom on his table, causing your head to rise seeing past the glass wall. She’s looking back at you- but upon making the eye contact she’s quick in snapping her head in the other direction. “Mm, Mr Zhong and his team are in the meeting room, it’s been more than 10 minutes sir. Mr Suh-”

“Stay,” Jaehyun stops slightly and tilts his head to the side watching you with a smile, ignoring the voice that still speaks on the intercom as he continues to rub his face on your boobs while his hands travel to your ass rocking you against his boat. “Please stay,”

"What?" You hum getting your eyes on him running your hand across his cheek following the lead of his hands as he controls your movements against his shaft.

"Stay until I get back,” He says again laughing by how mind fucked you looked. “I’m not even in you and you’re already losing your mind?”

“Sir?”

Jaehyun’s eyes are quick when turning sharp, looking annoyed making you giggle a little. He tries to force himself to stop rocking you against himself, but it’s so hard when he feels his edge coming on- but it’s still far. “Jae,” You snap him out of his thoughts. “We can continue when you get back,”

“Or,” His member twitches. “We could do it now,”

“We can’t, your secretary-”

“In the elevator as it’s going down,” He mutters. “No one’s gonna know,”

Your ears hear him and recall how he mentioned how slow the elevator is while going down. But you shake your head, knowing his dick is the one thinking right now. “Baby,” You get off him standing up and fixing up the buttons. “Come on,” Upon buttoning up your shirt, your eyes watch Jaehyun trying to catch his breath while his member is firmly poking his pants making a tent form. When finishing buttoning up your shirt, you turn around and stride towards his door. You don’t even turn around when Jaehyun questions.

“Wait you’re serious?” He catches on and quickly gets up adjusting his clothes and following. You wish you were serious, but knowing him, he won’t be focused when he’s in that meeting if you two had to get it on in the elevator. At least with a hard on, he’d be focused at the meeting. Is your sick thought. So your plan is just to lead him to the elevator.

“Take whatever you need for the meeting, hurry up you’re going to be late.” You quickly open the door and begin walking watching him scramble on his desk for the things he needs. Before you can march to the elevator you notice the secretary waving her hand from her office. You head to the secretary’s office. You notice she’s on the phone, but when she sees you she presses the phone to her shoulder clearing her throat.

“It’s urgent Mr Jung gets there now, Mr Suh says the bidders want to leave and won’t wait for Mr Jung to waste their time.” She places the phone back down on its hook and gets her journal and starts walking out.

You turn back and see Jaehyun looking over a file, before you follow her. “Uh, are you also going with him?”

“Yes.”

“Good, because he’s not thinking straight right now.” You mention when she presses a button and the doors automatically open up.

She snickers a little. “I’ve never seen him like this,” When getting in, you both turn back seeing him with wide confused eyes looking at Chae-won and then to you.

“It’s good you’re going with him, he’ll be in shape.” You turn your head back to him and pat his chest. “Good luck okay,” You stand on your tippy toes kissing his fazed lips.

“You tricked me.” He mutters when you gently push his stiff body in the elevator and Chae-won closes the elevator doors.

You try not to laugh at his annoyed face, but once the doors shut you can’t help the little cackle that leaves your lips. Meanwhile Jaehyun in the elevator huffs and pokes his tongue against his cheek when feeling an irritating poking from his member. He doesn’t even bother to cover up his poking bulge as his mind tries to gather his thoughts into the right place.

Chae-won’s cheeks are red from spotting the visible bulge. As soon at the elevator opens up moments later to the floor their supposed to be in- Chae-won walks ahead of Jaehyun and enters the meeting room first leaving the door open for Jaehyun knowing all too well that he will be in no mood to mess around. He grumpily walks alarming the male faces on the rectangular table. Despite him being late, no one on the table looks like they’ll complain as they get up politely bowing to him even though he doesn’t acknowledge them. “Shall we begin.”

.

It evident that things have changed between you and Jaehyun ever since you’ve had that talk. Dedicated and diligently keeping to his word, Jaehyun comes back home much earlier than before. Whereas back then he came back home around midnight sometimes 3pm, these days he’s back by 6h30pm and latest being 7pm. As he keeps to his word and arrives home much earlier than before, you try not to slack off on your end by committing to your work (since he also offered his assistance) and brand as a business.

His proposal was to serve as a guidance to help shape and form your business. At first you weren’t that interested in developing more into your business, however upon engaging into another conversation (which seemed more like a negotiation), he encouraged you that working would keep you less ‘bored’. He made references to how being active and working would make you sharp, on your feet, you’d have sunlight contact and you’d actually talk more to people instead of being alone. As your business revolved around photography and selling your pictures, Jaehyun mentioned you could make your offer more of a service and take photography into another level.

You admit that after hearing Jaehyun, you realized that you were very lazy. He didn’t say it out loud, but you could tell where he was going. He worked out a brainstorming project whereby he analyzed his way around your ideas (ideas you used to have in college), he made the sacrifice to knock off early and get home to help you – all in the name to get you kick started on working again.

You put in the effort to work mainly due to the reason that he wouldn’t stop saying: “You mean to tell me that you’ve got a degree yet you aren’t utilizing it to its full capacity because I’m the sole provider? You stay home for hours on end and sulk around because I’m not home, and mope around because you’re lonely, but then you’re not really doing anything to pass the time? You aren’t doing anything productive except loom over my absence? They are 24 hours in a day and you barely do anything except cook, clean and lament? Really Y/n? Could you waste any more time?”

Of course that caused some arguments to pop up here and there, but as the weeks passed and you began actually being productive instead of being a “housewife”, new problems came along.

Firstly, with the assistance of Jaehyun, you sought out a business plan, marketing plan, service plan and all the other plans. As you were pretty good with advertising your work online (on your blog), you kept rising the hype for your mini pop up store. You managed to secure a decent modernly vintage yet aesthetically pleasing place which would be transformed into the likeliness and hopes of being your business’s spot. As soon as you bought the space and building for your business store, you knew that you wouldn’t be resting as much as you wanted.

You tried to step up your game levels when it came to making a lot of the important decisions about your business because as you soon came to understand that you disliked (sometimes hated) that Jaehyun involved himself in too deeply. So you made sure that before 6pm everything that was on your bucket list had been ticked off, so that when Jaehyun would come back home, he didn’t have to help you that much.

It irritated you that he didn’t even know your vision that well and would place his ideologies here and there. So you had to step up tremendously, and even if Jaehyun didn’t say it out loud he was/is proud that you’ve been working hard. At least you got a taste of what it’s like to be preoccupied with work so much that you actually begin to appreciate someone busting their ass for their ungrateful self. But mostly, he was satisfied that he didn’t find you relaxing and sitting around whenever he came home.

He liked movement.

And soon enough, your home somehow become lively with you moving around. At some point you were actually not that bothered by the fact that you spent less time with Jaehyun. You moved from your production room into his office to ask about some accounting balance checkups, you’d prepare food for him and then go back to your little production room and never went to him again.

Because at times you needed a break from him. He was annoying to be around when all he spoke about was work.

“I’m telling you, when he’s on work mode, he’s on work mode. And when he’s not, he’s focused on me like a guard dog asking me what I did, what progress I made, where I need help, how I can improve, bluh bluh. I’ve just began realizing that I kinda missed it when he wasn’t home,” You stress to Haera who’s laughing at your misery, while she helps you unbox your kit. Your mini pop up store was looking good and pleasant with its minimum style, yet enticing and eye catching work, but there still needed to be work done. “Like majority of the days, he’s not so stressful to deal with. He comes home, we eat and we spend some quality time together without talking about work. But other days, he comes back home stressed and passes his stress onto me,”

Haera busts out laughing and she’s failing to hold in her breath while you carry on talking.

“Just yesterday, when he got home, he asked where the food was. I told him I’m still working, but I’ll get it done as soon as I’m done working. I thought he’d wait, but man goes into the kitchen and fixes his own food, and he gets angry. But I wasn’t about to have him mad at him, and then we sleep being angry, so I tell him that the next time he comes home and he’s hungry and he sees that there’s no food, he should know that I’m also working and that I’m tired too.”

“What did he say to that?” Haera calms down, wiping on her tears. “Man, you’re now starting to sound like a normal married woman who’s got a husband that’s always present,”

You ignore her and continue talking. “He didn’t even say anything, he ignored me. And I still had to make my own food, because he didn’t make any food for me.”

“Trouble in paradise,” Haera shakes her head, when she’s done packing the box and moves onto another box. She gets out of the way, of the men carrying a shelf made of glasses.

“Where should we put this?” You turn your head and give the men instructions of where you want to the sets of customized shelves to be placed.

Getting back to your station, Haera speaks up again. “So, that’s what was on your chest. Anything else?”

You sigh and organize your photo’s on the table. “Not really, I’m just tired. I’ve been really invested in getting this load done and out the way.”

She nods her head. “It’s coming in clean and I can’t wait for the launch. You said you’ve made the announcement right? How many tickets have been sold?”

“I was honestly surprised at the amount of tickets that were sold within the first day,” You marvel with in enthusiasm. “I’ve always known that I’ve had a handful of people who view my work, as well as a number of people who buy my actual work. However, combined I didn’t think I had over 150 people. To be honest, I memorize my clients and even though others have bought once, I still memorize them. So it’s honestly shocking that the online sales went up to 250 sales.” You shake your head in delight. “According to Jaehyun, he said I should prepare for at least 200 guests, but honestly I don’t even think the 150 people will actually show up, so to keep it fair I’ll get set catering for 100, and if more people come they’ll just stand.”

“Don’t down yourself like that babes,” Haera laughs. “You know your shit when it comes to photography, your pieces are all I have hanged up on my wall. Besides, you should listen to your husband, because if you say he’s been helping you out with marketing, what are the odds that he prompted your name to some of his business associates looking for a photographer?”

“I’m a stock photographer encompassing skills in advertising as well as production.” You state while finishing with the last box and stare at her. “Jae, well he thinks I’m a nude and erotic photographer,”

“How come?” Haera snickers lightly coming closer to assist you.

You shrug your shoulders giving her another tired look. “A lot of the aesthetic shots I take I sell them off to influencers to post on their social media feeds. If I want, I accept to shoot staged photos of products so that businesses can use them on their websites and such. My money comes from the advertising industry, where I show products off in the most appealing way possible for the target audience. This includes a combination of flat-lay product shots and photos of people using the product in the intended way. However, my dear husband only sees the erotic photography’s I’ve recently taken. He acknowledges them as a lucrative beneficial type of photography, and says it’s certainly a niche market for boudoir or bedroom photography. I don’t think he’d promote my work to his business associates,”

Haera can only chuckle. “You sound like you’re starting to distaste your husband,”

“It’s not that I’m starting to dislike him, it’s just,” You shrug your shoulders huffing out. You don’t exactly know why you’re so irked by him these days, all you know is that it’s irritating when all you talk about with him is business. “I just miss us talking about everything else except work.”

“Well,” Haera suggests while leaning in your ear to whisper out. “How’s the bedroom talk?”

You shake your head. “What bedroom talk?”

“You know, a little manaconda entering your-”

“Honestly, I’ve been too preoccupied on work to focus on that.” You state. “I now know how he’s been abstaining himself while doing overnights at work. The stress is too much. Between work and him, I’ll choose to keep working.”

“Geez, why’re you being a buzz kill?” Haera asks. “No wonder you’re both so tight you need to relieve some stress.”

“I’ll consider it after the event.” You state now as you open up your tablet to tick off the items that have been placed inside. Walking around the store you begin to make adjustments and continue unboxing as well as placing items by in their respective shelves as well as places.

“It’s looking good babes,” Haera approves when the store looks crowded and more spacious with all the frames on display.

“As it should,” You remark. You crack your fingers after placing the last nature album back on its stand, before taking interest in your best friend who’s been on her phone ever since unpacking the boxes. She smirks while crossing her legs and rapidly types on her phone. Taking a seat next to her on the couch, you peek at her phone. Getting a glimpse of the text messages, you turn your head away when seeing your friend send a nude photo from her gallery. “Who’re sending those to?”

“Who else?” She asks rhetorically, knowing very well that you know who.

Lately you friend has shown no signs of shame in openly expressing how her sexual life is booming behind closed doors with her husband.

Ever since telling off Jaemin in the elevator, which was months ago, you can practically say that you’re life has sort of come back to normal. Without the exception of cheating, both you and Jaemin have hardly spoken to each other. As much as you were adamant on not committing that same mistake again with a man who was never your husband, you couldn’t help but miss the warmth between your thighs whenever you felt needy.

As tempting as it was to know that he was one phone call away, you held in your urges and maintained your dignity in being Jaehyun’s wife. With Jaehyun’s face being a face you’ve began seeing way too many times, it was almost impossible to think of Jaemin. Although they are those times when you visit Jaehyun in the office and spot Jaemin and him having tea, or other times you enter the building and Jaemin’s down by the clerk’s desk talking to some businessmen before directing them to some place in the building. In all those instances if you make eye contact, you both move past each other like you hardly know each other.

So seeing his number on the top of Haera’s screen you roll your eyes and cross your arms. “What? Are you jealous that you aren’t getting any?”

“Jealous?” You raise your brow ignoring her. “Any news on Baekhyun and his wife’s baby shower?”

Haera laughs. “Not you being salty. Is it that bad with Jaehyun?” She lays her head on the couch watching you.

“Haera I don’t know what you’re talking about,” You shake your head. “Nothing’s wrong with Jaehyun and I-”

“Yeah except the fact that you’re both stressed. Like I get you’re going through a phase of recommitting to each other but damn, is it that bad that you’re getting salty?”

“I’m not salty.”

“You don’t have to say it, but it’s so obvious. You’re so tight and stressed.” She says while standing up following behind you as you try to walk away from her. She jogs up the stairs behind you as you head into your office. “You know what, tomorrow is Friday, why don’t you come down with me to Faded Fantasies and together we can release some stress-”

“Haera please. I should honestly be working, I can’t be slacking off. The opening date is right around the corner and I don’t want to lose focus. I promise that right after the opening, I’ll come with you,”

Haera sighs. “Alright, I’ll be going now. Jaemin is waiting for me,” She answers her ringing phone. “So tense,” She mumbles before letting out a little laugh. “I know right, her husband hasn’t been giving her any that’s why.”

Your face grows red but you swiftly walk away from her not giving ‘Jaemin’ over the phone call the satisfaction of seeing how embarrassed you are.

-

Getting home around 6pm you find out that you’re earlier then Jaehyun, and so as the idea hits you, you decide to put yourself out of your misery and dress up in your black silk sexy fabric wanting to get laid. Maybe Haera is right, you need to be loose a little so that you won’t be so tense all the time. And as you put on your matching lace bra and underwear which highlight your perky boobs and show off your firm buttocks you already feel yourself getting in a mood and hope that Jaehyun won’t turn you down.

When talking to Haera about your sex life you didn’t mention to her how you’ve been turning Jaehyun down whenever he wanted to lay with you. Now that you think about it, it could’ve been the thing both provoking you guys. But as you wear your sexy silk night dress that reaches up above your mid-thigh, barely covering your ass, you smile at yourself while looking at the mirror. You do nothing much with your hair expect comb it to lay flat against your back. He liked it that way. You add the dramatic lace stockings that held your legs firmly revealing your juicy prompt thighs on display. Already getting so horny you slide your hands down your body while giving yourself a show in your mirror. You’re watching your face and the features it makes while twirling your hips and playing with yourself. You don’t go any further simply wanting yourself not to tease yourself too much that you combust.

Checking if you still have some time to cook, you turn up some music from Jaehyun’s record player ero erotic, and make a full meal for the both of you. That way after eating, you can tease him a bit while he rests up before you both go make soft love in your room. The ideas swarming in your head has you feeling aroused already and so once you’re done cooking and cover up the food you check the time- but you can already hear the door keypad sounding that someone has arrived, that he has arrived. Going up the stairs quickly you go into your room you touch up on your features and making sure that your body popped tonight.

Seconds later, you can hear the music being lowered almost to mute and you take that as your opportunity to appear. Leaving your room and making your way to the spiral staircase, your legs tip toe down the stairs in a sexy way. Seeing his stiletto in black attire, you smile as you reach the top of the stair case and pose for him. “Hey sexy,”

Jaehyun turns around- your eyes widen in horror just as the person you thought was Jaehyun turns out to be Jaemin who’s stunned to see you. His eyes go over your body and quickly you cover yourself up with your silk gown- knowing it’s not see through your face gets heated as you pent in frustration. Just in time to see Jaehyun walking from the other side of the house. “Oh there you ar- oh. H-hey honey.”

Breathing in annoyance you scurry away holding your down below your buttocks so that they wouldn’t see anything. Dashing up the stairs and into your room you slam the door just as furiously as you remove your gown and throwing it on the floor. The one time when you want to have sex, its when you see his stupid face. To think you saw him again only in your most revealing of self-wear has you angry.

Seconds later Jaehyun opens up the bedroom door, his eyes widening shyly when seeing you remove your silk dress and toss it on the floor revealing your round sensational ass being held by a G-string. Feeling your anger and understanding immediately what you had plans for tonight, Jaehyun approaches you cautiously. “I should’ve called and told you I was bringing a work partner over. Honey I’m sorry,”

“Weren’t you the one who nagged yesterday for us to no longer to bring work home?”

“Honey, this was important,”

You ignore him and sit on the bed while removing your lace thigh stockings and replace them with the skinny jeans you wore and find a shirt to put over your bra.

“Honey,”

“What?”

“I’m sorry,” Jaehyun is aroused seeing you, but he feels so bad that he invited someone over when you were ready to engage with him. He so badly wanted you, and seeing you conceal all your sex appeal by tying up your hair and removing your makeup makes him grunt in disappointment. Now he’d have a grumpy wife. “Look, I didn’t want to come home late. I had a few more things to do, but the time was already finished. I asked him to come home with me so that we could finish up the work-”

“So what do you want me to do about that? Should I prepare the table for 3 now?” You finish removing the makeup from your face with a wet wipe stand up while folding your arms. “You should go back to your date, I’ll get dinner plated-”

“Please don’t be mad,” Jaehyun gets you in a hug and kisses the top of your head. Being cranky about not having intercourse is normal and Jaehyun understands why you’re so upset. But he doesn’t know that the other reason you’re upset is because he brought the last person you wanted to see come over to your house. You didn’t like the fact that Jaemin saw you half naked and all purled up for your husband- you were hoping he’d never get to see you again in your slutty attire.

So after rolling your eyes and hugging Jaehyun back half-heartedly you put on your slippers and make your way down the stairs. Jaemin is still by the bottom of the staircase, and when he sees you coming down he attempts to bow his head at you but you barely spare him a glance as you strut away from his view. He wasn’t expecting to see you like that. Seeing you look so sexy and ready for a good fuck, he can’t even lie that he got turned on from the little he saw. Shit. His eyes follow your figure until you’re out of sight.

Looking up the stairs when he sees Jaehyun walking down the steps with his hand scratching the back of his head. Jaemin tries to lighten the mood. “I guess the Miss’s had other plans. S-should I leave?”

“No, it’s okay.” Jaehyun lets out a breath and gets his briefcase along with his laptop bag and nudges up the stairs. “Let’s get these documents out the way. She’s making dinner, hopefully we can finish up fast and have you leave before your wife starts calling.”

Going up the stairs following Jaehyun, Jaemin tries to cover his slowly forming bulge.

In the kitchen you begin to make another pot of food, seeing as they won’t be enough to plate up for Jaemin. Instead of placing the finished meal on the usual dining table, you set it in the four sitter dining room as they’ll only be three of you. When you’re done you make your way up until you reach Jaehyun’s office. The door is left adjured and you stick your head in. “Diner’s ready,”

Jaehyun’s eyes move away from his laptop to you before nodding his head. “I’ll be down.”

Your eyes move around his office seeing a variety of paperwork and another open laptop but you don’t see Jaemin. “Where’s Jaemin?”

“Restroom.”

You nod your head. “I’ll go ahead and start without you guys.” You don’t give Jaehyun time to respond as you head towards the staircase. Instead of starting without them, you simply take your plate and head on to kitchen to watch on the tv placed there. You can hear Jaemin and Jaehyun occasionally laugh from time to time, and you wonder how it is that Jaehyun actually became friendlier with Jaemin-whilst almost months ago he looked like he was about to throw hands with him.

Before you’re even finished with your food Jaehyun enters the kitchen with some plates in his hands. You peek at him getting off your stool. “You guys done?”

“Yes,”

“Let me remove the plates from the table, you head on to your date,”

“Babe-”

“It’s okay,” You sigh and let out a small tight smile. “I’m calmed down. Just needed to eat.”

Jaehyun checks to see if you’re really telling the truth, and then eventually drawing near to you to give you a hug. His arms wrap around yours and you lay your head on his chest. “Don’t go to sleep just yet, okay? Wait for me,”

“Sure,” You nod your head as he walks out the kitchen with you following behind. Jaemin is nowhere in sight, and that makes it easier for you as you pack all the plates and food together. You wash the dishes, give the kitchen a last minute clean up, wiping down all the tables where you ate as well as Jaehyun and Jaemin before heading up the stairs wanting to head to your room. On your way, you catch Jaemin leaving Jaehyun’s office. Ignoring his presence, you’re not expected to be called back. Your head snaps to him. “What?”

“Yikes,” He lowly chortles before drawing closer down the steps to you. “Thanks for the food. It was delicious. Best homemade meal I’ve ever had,”

In your head, you’re reminded of how much Haera hates cooking and prefers eating out. Not wanting to create conversation with him, you acknowledge the compliment with a little head nod before making your way past him- however yet again he stops you. This time by holding tight onto your wrist. “What?”

“Damn I get that we’re not…you know-”

“Jaemin I don’t have time for this-”

“Could we even just be friends? It’s not like all we had was sex-” You instantly shush him, and he cowers with acknowledgment before muttering a sorry. “I’m sorry. But you know what I mean. I missed talking to you,”

“Hate to burst your bubble, from my view it was only pure transactional intercourse. Now if you’ll excuse me-”

“Your pop up store was amazing.” He speaks, causing you to stop again and turn to him. “Really liked what you did with the place, it looks like it’ll have a long lasting business life span. I never got the chance to say that, but seeing as you’re not interested in building our friendship, I might as well say it now.”

You’re tempted to walk away again, but what he says strikes a daring nerve. “Building our friendship? Really now?”

“Pure friendship with no strings,” He mutters. “I just really hate passing you by in the hallways at work, or not being able to talk to you normally. It’s tense and you keep giving me this death glare. Look, I’m apologizing now for how I became too comfortable around you. We should’ve just started out as friends and not gone down the path we did. I messed up and I admit that. I’m sorry for tempting you and fooling around. And I know you said it was purely sex transaction for you, but for me it was more than that, I thought about the conversations we had. It was nice actually talking to someone else other than Haera, and letting out my business ideas or talking about my life and you showed interests of actually caring and I liked how you encouraged me and gifted me something on my birthday. I mean-”

As Jaemin talks, your closed off face begins to notice that his eyes are big and shining so bright while talking to you. He looks remorseful yet he seems content with the little attention you’re giving him. Your mind is fixated on his delighted face and diluted eyes, that it takes you a while to notice it…but he actually looks sad. And once your eyes catch onto the sadness replaced by the façade of the smile on his face, you gather up a question. Not minding that he’s still talking, you lightly interrupt. “Is everything okay?” Your tone is soft and almost worrying.

Jaemin’s speech halts just as his ears catch the question. For a brief second his face collapses into his true emotion, but after catching the sight of Jaehyun coming down the steps behind you, his fictitious smile comes back. “I was telling her that her store gives firm statistics that it’ll run for a long period of time,”

You jerk a little when Jaehyun suddenly appears behind you placing a hand on your hip. “That’s actually very genuine of you.” Jaehyun proudly smiles before nudging you a little. “She’s overflowing with work, works more hours than me, very soon she’ll be paying the expenses.”

“I could never beat you, you literally brought your work home,” You lightly kid when turning to Jaehyun. “So, I see your date went well,”

“Date?” That earns Jaemin a light chuckle. He really liked seeing you happy and making your light jokes, you really excelled in diverting attention. A graceful topic of work implores over the three of you, before ultimately Jaemin leaves and it’s left you and Jaehyun. Closing the doors and locking them, you allow Jaehyun to sweep you off your feet and take you up the stairs.

Telling him you’re too tired for any sexual activity makes him downcasted, yet he still has a smile on his face when you both drown in each other’s scents and sleep…

Or at least you try to sleep. Your mind is alive and buzzing with thoughts both on what Jaemin revealed and how he wants to rekindle the ‘friendship’ you both had. From what you recall when spending time with him, it’d always lead up to him whipping out his manhood and inserting it into your womanhood. You don’t recall any sentimental talks- aside from him talking about his desires and interests…and even talking about how much worth he feels as a man and ‘rebound husband’ to his wife… Okay, maybe he did pour out his feelings to you, and he trusted you enough to tell you what’s been going on in his life and how he feels. You think back to his eyes and how he looked at you like someone who’s receiving attention from a person they really like for the first time. For the time you’ve known him, you’ve only seen him as someone who allowed you to explore into the cheating territory, you never thought that he was using that same territory as a haven where he could let out his emotions.

The decision comes naturally to you when in the morning Jaehyun goes off to work. You wonder if really, this friendship between you and Jaemin might just work out. You feel awful that you never noticed him to have any other feelings, and simply mistook his feelings as a drive of sexual thirst. But after seeing his down casted face and eyes, you thought to yourself that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to engage in a friendship with him.

And so, without a doubt, you’re walking into Jaehyun’s building with the motive to see Jaehyun, but alternatively see Jaemin too. And to your luck when the receptionist down stairs lets you up as usual, you’re surprised to find Jaemin already in Jaehyun’s office. He’s hunched over on Jaehyun’s desk arranging some papers. He gets surprised to see you, just as much as you.

“Hey, where’s Jaehyun?”

“Oh, him and Chae-won went to the factory to check on the samples.” Jaemin briefs you in. “Are you here to see him?” He timidly asks, as if testing the boarders of whether or not you’d ignore him.

“Yeah,” You answer him and motion to the lounge area. “I’ll just wait for him here,”

He nods his head with a faint smile. “Cool, I’ll be here then.” He motions to his own work that he was doing before you came in.

You nod your head and move over to the lounge area. Setting up the food and covering it in as you wait for Jaehyun, you make your way to Jaemin. He’s dead focused on his work, however when he notices you- his smile joins on his face. He’s happy that after some months, you’re actually not giving him the cold shoulder. “I know you’re busy, but I still wanna ask. Are you busy?”

“Uh,” His chuckle has you going over on Jaehyun’s chair and taking a seat on it. Feeling like a big boss, your arms rest on it as if you’re doing a proposal. “I need to finish arranging your husband’s tax invoice from the company’s personal invoice. It’s not as hectic as it looks. Why?”

“Just wondering,” You hum out. Watching him work, allows you to process in your head the types of questions and conversations you want to have with him.

“Aren’t you supposed to be at work right now?”

His question snaps your attention to the now and you nod your head. “I’ll head there after here. As a boss I can go in any time I want,”

He chuckles a little. “Make sure not to abuse your power. Your employees see and judge you without words,”

“I’m aware.” You shrug your shoulders leaning back into the seat. “It only took 1 week for me to realize how monstrous and cruel the unspoken environment of the workplace work feels like,”

“With a face and mind like yours, you look determined to get the job done. I have no doubt that you’ll keep it running for a really long time,” he comments kindly.

Meanwhile you scoff teasingly when remembering his words of last night. “Do you really think my business is gonna last long?”

“Yeah, certainly.” Jaemin answers truthfully looking into your eyes for a second. “I was there at the opening, and when hearing your speech and seeing the goods, personal services as well as public services you provided, I thought to myself how dynamically creative you are. Your vision came out perfectly and from the sounds of how Jaehyun describes your enterprise, it surely does manifest a success. I even ordered from your photography collection and bought a camera.”

“I saw you looking for one,” You nod your head with a proud smile. “Thanks for supporting. I can only keep my fingers crossed and hope to keep my business running for as long as possible. Oh yeah, isn’t your business like 4 months old now going to 5? How’s that going?”

“4 months old?” That makes him smile lightly. “How’d you know?”

“Haera might’ve mentioned you hosting a party for your business turning 4 months. She invited me but…yeah,” You try not to make it awkward and end of with a smile.

Jaemin nods his head returning your smile none the less. “The party went well, although I think your presence would’ve spiced up the night a little more,” His underlying tone has you feeling tensed for a second. You try not to think too much about his statement and listen to him talk on about his business. “It’s booming as always. You know with a club, it’s quite different from a business, because it all depends on the number of customers. Thankfully, my customers aren’t a number short, and it seems to be growing by night. It doesn’t have too much scandals, and by law it does everything right,”

“How do you handle working in the morning and at night?”

He shrugs his shoulders and takes a seat. “You’d be surprised that I actually have a lot of energy at night. Gives me freedom from my hell hole of a morning life,” He mutters out the last part. Judging from the fact that you heard it just shows how he wanted you to hear it.

“So,” You start when noticing he’s not as busy. “About what you said yesterday,”

He looks confused for a bit, yet he still nods his head. “About?”

“Us being friends,” You clarify, and his eyes briefly take yours in. As if anticipating what your answer or reaction would be. “I thought about it, almost the whole of last night. And I wanted to apologize to you.”

“You wanted to apologize to me?” The shock is evident on his voice. “What for? I’m the one who pushed you into-”

“I didn’t realize that you were actually pouring out your anxieties and thoughts to me. I only thought about sex and how you pleased me.” You mutter out. “So when I realized that you were genuinely expressing yourself to me, I felt bad that I couldn’t separate lust from reality,”

Jaemin nods his head after a while. His eyes go back to his work. You wait for him to say something, but when nothing comes out, you wonder if you said anything wrong.

“I don’t know about what type of friendship you had in mind but I was really hoping that we could start on a clean slate, if that’s okay with you?”

Whatever his answer is, you’re hoping that this won’t lead doors into another mistake between the both of you. He looks to you and smiles a little. “I don’t want you to feel forced.”

“This is me returning the favor. For every pleasure you gave me, despite it being out of context, I wanna be there for you the way you were there for me.”

Jaemin doesn’t say anything and it’s not long before you see Jaehyun and Chae-won appearing. You sigh when Jaemin doesn’t say anything and also get a little sad once Jaehyun walks in the office. You get off his chair and embrace him in a hug, while Jaemin goes on working and not minding the both of you.

The next couple of days are filled with work piling on top of each other. You focus on work while keeping time for Jaehyun, however that serves as impossible as the only time you see him is when it’s time to eat and when it’s time to sleep. Jaehyun stated that for the first couple of weeks and months work is tough, as you have to put all your energy into grooming it and making it grow. So while he understood your reasons for being preoccupied by work- you found it strange how at times you’d drift back into the state of barely seeing him. And to be honest you missed spending time with him. And when you get lonely, your mind turns to Jaemin. With Jaemin not giving you any proper answer, you don’t try to force anything but you can’t lie that he comes across your mind more frequently then often. And when Haera comes with a ‘work escape’ offer and it involves Jaemin’s club- you can’t help but become excited and immediately agree.

“So Haera and I are gonna go out this Saturday night,” You mention when laying down on the couch while Jaehyun flips through the tv stations seeking for what to watch.

“Where?”

“A club, Faded Fantasies,”

“I’ve never heard of that club,” He mutters, his eyes intensely reading the description as quick as possible. “Is it new?”

“Well if you mean new as in turning 5 months this Saturday then yes,”

“Do you have that sort of time to be wasting at some random club?” By his tone of disapproval, you get up from your side of the couch and move over to him.

“Come on babe,” You cutely impose. “It’s just for some fun, a little stress reliever, you can come to,”

“To some random club? I don’t think so.”

“Jaemin owns the club, so it’s not as random as you say,” You regret saying your sentence, as you watch Jaehyun freeze for a second. Your mind is quick in working out what next to say, however Jaehyun beats you to it.

“This Saturday?”

“Mhm,” you hum and give him a cute smile. “When was the last time we relieved stress together? I think it’d be a great chance for us to do so,”

You can’t tell what’s the look in Jaehyun’s eyes when he turns to gaze at you. There’s a bit of hesitancy and reluctance, but he effortlessly nods his head in agreeing, as if it’s something he needed to desperately do. You feel too content to even pay mind about his subtle confusion. You don’t even know why you’re too elatedly vibrant, all you know is that you might get to see Jaemin. Maybe it’s because you were once so used to having him balls deep into you that for the past few months of not getting any attention has set you a bit off.

When Saturday night comes and the hours roll by with Jaehyun going to work and coming home just in time to see you dressing up, you inform Haera that you’ll be tagging together with Jaehyun and that you don’t need a lift. She seems even more joyful at the news then you yourself- and you can tell that it’s because of selfish reasons but you don’t pay any mind to it. Your head is so wrapped around and fixated on seeing Jaemin that everything flies past your head. It’s almost as though you’re on cloud 9.

Perhaps if you paid attention to your surroundings a little more, you’d have realized that going to the club was a huge mistake. Firstly, while the location was still the same, a few modifications were done. It was no longer a first floor club, but now it had a double story, but the second floor was reserved for separate parties. As in Jaemin’s top customers who wanted a whole floor to themselves to do ‘god knows what’. Secondly, everything around seemed a little more hazy- as if it was a set up for trapping you into doing something you didn’t want. The lights were dimmed a little more, the music style changed and there was now a dj that set a tone for everything. While Jaemin was frequently busy as he still ran the drinks from time to time, he also had time to casually slide into the party and enjoy himself- it could be because he got himself a set of new workers who were really handy.

You and Jaehyun dressed up in club casual clothes, with you going with a smooth black tight dress that reached above your thighs, to Jaehyun matching with his standard black clothes, black suit pants and a white buttoned down shirt that had a few buttons missing at the top, allowing a part of his chest to be revealed. Come to think of it, you admired him and remembered all the reasons why he was sexy and could pull off anything. However, while your brain believed that you’d solely keep your attention on Jaehyun- once you reached the club and your mind adjusted to all the new changes, you couldn’t keep your eyes off Jaemin’s post.

Meeting Haera, who was already drunk, you easily joined her on the floor while Jaehyun found himself on the bar stool engaging in conversation with Jaemin. Jaehyun had his back to you, and Jaemin was behind the desk with his full view being in line with you. The dj toned the mood down into a sexual scenery and after a couple of drinks with Haera, you and her began dancing in such seductive manners that it just gets the attention of both your husbands.

Haera holds onto your waist and you drunkenly slide down her body letting your hands explore her figure and frame. She equally engages in the seductive dance as you’re both horny and thirsty on the dance floor, creating some form of attention to be on the both of you guys. But you both don’t mind as you’re half aware and half faded. All you care about is grinding on each other to get into a position of intimacy. At some point of your sexual thirst your tongues are entwined together and slither past each other wet and sloppy being the definition of you two. Fingers tracing every inch of her body just as she roams your body. You feel so hot, so bothered, so desperate for more that when you explicitly peer at Jaehyun- you except to see him looking back at you with lust- however you're met with Jaemin's dark pupils on you.

Which intensifies the moment you pull away from Haera and motion that you're going to the bathroom. Jaemin takes it as an opportunity to approach and follow you into the washroom. You intentionally wait by the door for him, and out of heat from all the make out with Haera, you don't wait a second to pounce on Jaemin's lips the moment he steps into the washroom.

Jaemin too doesn't stop you and attaches his lips deeper and his hands running up and down your body as he navigates you into one toilet stall. He mutters a little 'Are you sure?' but you're in pants and heaps of excitement when he hastily pulls up your tight dress over your bare thighs. Then he leans down and kisses up and down your leg, and then your inner thigh. Excitement reaches him when he meets your bare pussy in his face with no under garment. Your eyes close and his tongue traces down your center and to the slit at your apex, licking and sucking until you're ready to explode under his tongue. Jaemin being a master adds his touch by sliding his fingers just as his tongue move all across your sex.

Your fingers dig into his hair and hold on tightly to his head not wanting to let him go. Jaemin gets up and attaches his lips to yours again allowing you to taste your sweet and sour wetness. He slides a finger inside of you, caressing and teasing until you whimper in his mouth and arch your back trying to find more sensation with your own hand by placing it over his and helping him help you by rubbing you faster. His breath becomes ragged and his lips move away from your lips as he sinks on the floor again, but not before placing his tongue against the small hole he'd left and flicking his tongue across it. You moan and he continues to lick and suck until you're ready to come again. "Jaemin,"

He moans just as you help him unbuckle his pants. "Fuck, you're so hot. Your husband stepped out for a call and I couldn't help myself."

"Me neither," You position yourself over Jaemin's member just as he slams you against the door and thrusts himself up. It feels good and your head falls back on the wall as he pushes into you roughly. The feeling is amazing and you gasp loudly as your orgasm hits you harder than anything. "I've missed you so much," You wanna blame the alcohol, but a part of you really misses rough sex with Jaemin.

"Fuck!" Jaemin groans.

After that night with Jaehyun, he casually returned back to normal into intimate sex without all the roughness. And although it was nice, you barely had sex after that, and so now feeling how Jaemin's whole cock finds pleasure in your hole, you can't help but cry out in bliss as Jaemin thrusts harder into you, and your orgasm takes you. "Fuck!" You cry, clenching the sides of Jaemin's shoulders and burying your nails into them, digging in deep enough to draw blood.

"I love you so fucking much," Jaemin moans into your ear, holding onto you tighter to him.

His confession has you stiff. But you're equally panting from how rough that was. "Shit," You whisper out and blink a couple of times to get your vision back in focus. Getting off of Jaemin's cock, you ignore his confession and begin cleaning yourself up quick. "Shit," You curse again as you slowly come to realization of what you've just done. "I've gotta go," the light alcohol in your system has you tossing the used toilet paper into the toilet as you flush and quickly walk out the stall adjusting your clothes- you get a chance to see your reflection in the mirror and boy do you look drunk and fucked.

You walk out the washroom in time to see Jaehyun searching for you on the dance floor- once you make eye contact with him, your nervous smile comes on and you walk towards him.

You're not expecting him to kiss you, but when he does you halt only for a second before wrapping your arms around his shoulder and drawing yourself close to him.

Shit.

The sex you had with Jaemin was supposed to be for Jaehyun. The way he's kissing you and holding you tightly to him only shows his desire to be with you even if there was no actual physical activity between the two of you for months. As he's kissing you and his arms slide across your ass and gives it a squeeze- you only feel an intense amount of guilt spread over you. Fuck. If you'd just waited a little bit longer, it could've been Jaehyun's dick inside of you.

You're not even focused on the kiss as much as your mind is flooded with so much guilt- yet when the dim scenery of the club fades away and you notice you're in a bright place- you immediately realize it's the washroom that you were in several of minutes ago. Jaehyun is hot and bothered, needy and intense when his lips don't stop going down your neck, his hand squeezing your ass tighter than it already is. He starts kissing up the side of your face while you have to stand there with your legs shaking as if they've lost their strength. But you try to hold on. He's right here and he wants you, he'll never hurt you. Just like how he loves you.

"You're already shaking, damn I didn't even do anything,"

Jaemin's who's in the stall simply sitting down and regreting his whole decision to have sex with you again, is alerted when hearing Jaehyun's voice. His brows furrow before he stands up from the toilet seat and peers out of the door. Jaehyun's frame is over yours and your hands are around his neck. In a swift move Jaehyun picks you up as you spread your legs around his torso still in a steamy make out session with his tongue still invading your mouth. Your legs fall open wide feeling his boner and his hands roam down your body pressing you into him while they find their way beneath the fabric of your dress and onto your breasts and kneading them lightly as he continues to kiss your neck. "No panties hm?" Jaehyun laughs into the kiss.

A random guy walks into the washroom and cusses out before exiting when noticing how you're half naked and Jaehyun has you pinned up the wall against his body. That doesn't stop Jaehyun from continuously gnawing at your lips.

The first thing Jaemin notices from you and Jaehyun's make out is how passionate Jaehyun is.

Jaehyun isn't rough with you, he caresses your body, compliments you softly, has you moaning in such a soft voice- and it stings his heart because despite just cheating a few minutes ago- you look so safe in Jaehyun's arms. You hold him extra tight when you're moaning, you run your hand over his hair, you maintain eye contact with him- you're literally looking into his eyes as he's making love to you. That's what it is, it's sex but from your intimacy with Jaehyun, it looks so much like love sex.

Jaehyun is not in a rush and is taking his time with you, even when he asks if you're okay with doing it in the bathroom, Jaemin stays back in his own toilet stall and hears you. You're moaning as Jaehyun's gentle hands massage and dip into your wet pussy. Your legs around Jaehyun's waist don't flatter as you hold him tight while he takes off his belt and now holds you with both hands holding your thighs as he pumps his hips back and forth slowly but so deep. It hurts because you're overly sensitive, but as quick as the pain comes — with how gentle Jaehyun is the pain fades away and it's replaced with pleasure.

"Ah," You moan and throw your head back. Jaehyun's thrusts aren't rough and fast like Jaemin, but there are deep and so slow- hitting on all the right spots. He pulls out and in with such precision that you keep your eyes on him as he fucks you with passion.

"You're so pretty," Jaehyun says leaning in for another kiss. Jaemin watches you and his heart takes in the sight of how beautiful you look when locking eyes with your husband. With every hit of Jaehyun's cock you reach your climax, with each pull on your nipples you scream louder, but in all that Jaehyun's care over you has Jaemin in how passionate you both look.

For a while now, it's all he's been looking for. Passion in love. With Haera, it's never passion, it's always a give and take. While he enjoyed rough sex, a part of him also wished to enjoy the intimacy in holding and caressing and staring so deep into each other’s eyes that you fall in love all over again. Even though he can't see Jaehyun's eyes, your eyes on Jaehyun are so profound and intense that it has him feeling something in his heart. You love Jaehyun. And even though you had sex with Jaemin, he can clearly see where your heart lies. Your eyes are avidly and keenly engraved on Jaehyun.

And just for a little while, as Jaehyun pounds into you and you forget all about Jaemin, the guilt and shame return when Jaehyun pours out his seeds inside of you and you clean yourself up before throwing the tissue away. While you stand by the sink with your gaze on the mirror, Jaehyun stands behind you and leans into you whispering in your ear. “That was fun,”

Fuck. You should’ve really waited a little bit longer for Jaehyun, instead of getting it on with Jaemin.

2 Weeks later

You try as hard as possible to avoid Jaehyun’s work place, Jaemin, Haera and even the Faded Fantasies club. While Jaehyun was highly impressed after being there for one night, your experience had you wishing you never went in the first place. You can’t believe you slept with Jaemin. Again. Now you were all the way back in level 1. It didn’t help that even if you avoided Jaehyun’s work place, Jaehyun occasionally brought Jaemin to your home- sometimes he even brought Jaemin back home to assist him as well with his own Club Business Project.

You couldn’t look Jaemin in the eye knowing that you shamefully had sex with him again, and you can tell that he felt the same way, because whenever you somehow locked eyes you both looked away and walked in opposite directions.

“So,” Haera starts while taking a seat across from you in your office. “What is the deal with you and my husband?” You choke on air looking up immediately at her- only to see her startled by your reaction. “Calm down girl, what’s wrong?”

“You asked me what? About your husband?”

“Oh,” Haera runs her fingers through her hair. “I meant it in a simple way, not an accusing way babes, relax. He speaks so highly of you as if you did something for him. So I’m asking, what spell have you casted on him?”

You sigh out, breathing out in relief. “I’m still not sure what you mean by that, so I’ll ignore the question entirely.”

“The other night we were having sex, and all of a sudden he asks me how you and I became friends. He’s balls deep inside and he asks me this, I tell him we met in college. And then he goes on to asking different questions about you, such as your favorite band, taste, attractive qualities you like and so on. Imagine this, but he’s fucking me hardcore.”

Your face naturally gets red because you feel like you're caught, but after hearing the types of questions he asked Haera you stop writing for a while and look up to her. "Well, did you ask him why?"

"I did," Haera scoffs a little and avoids your eyes. "He said some dumb excuse, that he wanted to get you a birthday gift," While Haera says this, she's reminded of Jaemin's actual response to her…

"I think I might be in love with her." Jaemin pounds deeper into her before taking a different approach and begins pounding slowly and with all his force. "Fuck, she's the type of woman I love, she's so passionate and dedicated to something so small as love. Ah- You should see how she looks at Jaehyun. Fuck, I wish you could look at me like that." As Jaemin says that, his eyes change when looking at Haera. And even though he's having sex with her, Haera can just tell that the lustful eyes her husband is giving her is actually meant for Y/n instead of her. "I would've loved you more if you were her–"

"Fuck you. Are you drunk?" Haera's face turns into disgust and in anger she grabs Jaemin's shoulder while his eyes enlarge and she switches position now being on top of him. Leaning back she begins to ride him in a fast manner, quickening the pace trying to stop Jaemin from how he was pounding into her slowly. "Don't you ever compare me to her. You don't know what I've been through, so don't you fucking dare try to judge me. Hell if I wasn't so into men I'd have left you for her. You think you're worth the love? Fuck you, fuck me, ah,"

Haera looks up and watches you working. "I think I love him… Jaemin I mean."

That makes you stop writing for a bit, in fact it bursts you out of your thoughts. When Haera mentioned that Jaemin spoke about you because he wanted to get you something for your birthday, all you could think about is how to politely cut of the sexual transaction you guys have imposed on yourselves again. However hearing Haera's confession makes an explosion occur in your heart- because just weeks ago, you heard Jaemin confessing to you. Your eyes peer into Haera's eyes- and for the first time since you've known her, she actually looks sincere. She's never looked like this while being with Donghyuck and surely whenever she'd cry to you she never exposed her real emotions and always played it off as as some little thing. But now, her eyes are bit bigger, there's a glint of light that reflects her sincere emotions.

She chuckles faintly and leans back on her seat and stares ahead. "It sounds deluded, I know right. I love him more after that night we had sex. I think, a part of me realized how much he cares about me and how much I've taken him for granted. First of all, coming home to a partner waiting for you is truly the best thing any woman could ask for. He's always there for me. Listening to me rent, always trying to cheer me up with wanting to do something new or having sex in different ways- I mean even if I'm a bitch to him and treat him like crap, he's faithful and loyal to making me always feel good. Maybe I've been too harsh on him, but hearing him talk so fondly of you kinda made me jealous." She scoffs and looks at her wedding band on her ring finger. "I know I have nothing to be jealous of, but I love you babes, so much. And if I love you, and Jaehyun loves you, I'm afraid that Jaemin will start loving you… Jaemin has started to find reasons to love you too and it's making me anxious because…I want him to love me too…the way he loves you- God what am I even saying."

And just like that, you watch Haera shut down from voicing out her thoughts. Her unconscious thoughts. Hearing Haera implode such profound details of her love life has you shocked. It may have been a little peek but just hearing it makes you feel guilty. You heard Jaemin say he loves you and hearing your best friend being vulnerable makes you feel bad. "I love you too Haera." You confess as you get up on your feet and round the table to get to her. You stand right in front of her and she gets up and comes in for a hug. The ability to tell whenever she needed a hug still surprises you.

As she hugs you tightly you can feel how she's shaking. "I love you too babes, and I love him too,"

You can only hug her as she pours out her soul.

-

Later on in the evening when you return home you've got a lot on your mind. Aside from work, Jaehyun and Jaemin, at the top of your head is now Haera, your best friend who you have betrayed. You feel incredibly pitiful when thinking you've lusted over man, you've had sex with her man and overall you think her man might love you. To think that even though you don't feel an romantic feelings for Jaemin - Jaemin feels a lot for you. Not only did he remember you birthday but he's been curiously asking about you. What's worse, is that your best friend who doesn't have a heart has suddenly found a heart and wants to use it to fall in love with Jaemin. The only problem though, is you.

While Jaehyun has reduced his expansion of going to work from morning till night, you feel as though you've put him in a dark corner by sneaking around his back whenever you've been with Jaemin. Jaehyun has done nothing but give himself to you, he's devoted countless of hours into helping you with your business as well as being the present husband you've always wanted. It sucks because your present husband knows who Jaemin is, and Jaemin seems to have gotten a special trust from his boss after knowing that the both of you are friends. Jaehyun speaks good words about Jaemin, and it doesn't help that you've slept with him- because now it seems as though you've not only crossed a relationship line, but you've crossed a business line too.

For crying out loud, your wedding vows are ringing loudly and clearly whenever you think about how you betrayed Jaehyun too.

Jaehyun doesn't deserve your betrayal, and neither does Haera. Come to think of it, not even Jaemin deserves the feelings he's gotten for you. Somehow you've led him on. Perhaps you were both thinking of sex that night, but maybe it wouldn't have gone that way if you weren't so eager to have him lips locked from the moment he entered the door.

With so much thoughts in your head, you get out your phone and make a rash decision to text Jaemin.

You: What we did that night… mistake right? you don't really love me… do you? becuz if I'm being real we can't take back that night, but we can take back our words. You don't love me Jaemin. I love my husband. We should stop having sex becuz it's not looking good anymore. Please respond… say something, anything…

You begin to prepare food for both you and Jaehyun as you wait for him to come home, while at the same time waiting for Jaemin to text back.

Jaemin doesn't text back and after a whole hour passes you're done making food. Your mind is elsewhere when you're alone in he living room waiting for Jaehyun to come home. The moment your phone dings, you jump and attended to your phone immediately.

Jaehyun: I'm drunk babe. Fetch me

Your anxiety simmers down when reading the text and realising it's from Jaehyun. You get a little confused when reading the text again. Standing up you make your way to your room as you double check on Jaemin's message. You're fresh your screen hoping that your phone glitched when he texted. But instead there's no glitch and there's no text from Jaemin. Getting a set of car keys from Jaehyun's drawer you put on some shoes and check a safe car to go with. Your not much of a driver and prefer your driver to drive you around, but for a long time (probably months) you've let your driver go because you enjoyed walking with Haera or alone.

So getting a white BMW from the set of cars, you prepare yourself to start driving as the sun has set leaving darkness to fill up on the sky above. As you start driving under the dark purple sky, you love as it turns into a navy blue before it's complete darkness by the end of your journey. Parking outside of Jaehyun's company. You lock the door and head up the stairs leading into the entrance of the company. The lobby secretary isn't present but the security and cleaner greet you and let you in easily leaving you enter the elevator and heading on upstairs.

"So slow," you mutter when the elevator finally reaches the top after several minutes. You exit the elevator but stop when seeing the whole hallway leading to Jaehyun's office is dark. The only light emitting is from his office. Taking a few steps you walk calmly when sensing some movements after hearing some papers rustling.

Quietly entering into the office you're surprised when seeing the familiar figure of Jaehyun not inside the office but instead it's Jaemin. Jaemin is seated by the down step of the lounging area. He stands up and moves towards the couch. He takes a seat nonchalantly muttering out some words.

"Jaemin?"

His head snaps up and his eyes widen. He removes an ear pod and clears his throat. "Hey, what are you doing here?"

"What are you doing here?" You emphasize.

"Doing a last minute fact check before tomorrows board meeting. Your husband wants me to introduce the concept of the Class scent to tomorrows bidders. The Chinese are coming, and Japanese, but we're mostly marketing to the European board members." Jaemin answers and clasps a bunch of papers into his hand before propping then nicely on the table. "It's going all well, I'd say I'm doing well."

"Why are you in his office though?"

"Like I said, fact check. He's got the papers and projector that I need. It's under close supervision so that no mistakes can happen. Which is why I can't take it out and lose anything by accident, so I'll just have to be here,"

"Oh," You nod your head. "So you're busy." You mutter when getting that out of the way and look to Jaehyun's table. "So where's Jaehyun?"

"He went home?" Jaemin raises his brow. "He left, so I assumed he's going home,"

"But.." you take out your phone, just as Jaemin stands up and cautiously moves close to you. "He sent me a text saying he needed me to pick him up,"

"Pick him up?"

"Said he was drunk,"

"He looked perfectly fine when leaving the office, sober even." Jaemin tilts his head. "Did he say you should come here?"

Finally getting another look at the message, you notice that he sent another message after that.

Jaehyun: I'm drunk babe. Fetch me - I think I'm at Fantasy Faded👁️ it's Jaemin's club that one yeah

You sigh and shoe Jaemin the message. "What's he doing at my club?"

"By the text, it seems like he's drinking," You put your phone on your pocket but stop halfway when remembering your message to Jaemin. "Hey. Do, you have, a minute to spare?"

"Mhm," he nods his head, and the nervousness comes back to his face. "It's about the club right?"

Your eyes squint a little. "Did you read my text?"

Jaemin's eyebrows raise and he gets out his phone inspecting it. "What text?"

"My text message, that I sent you?"

Jaemin looking down and scanning his messages shakes his head. "I got nothing,"

"Nothing?" You go to his message to check if you hit sent when sending the message. "But I sent… Anyway Uhm, here,"

You give Jaemin your phone to read the message…

You: What we did that night… mistake right? you don't really love me… do you? becuz if I'm being real we can't take back that night, but we can take back our words. You don't love me Jaemin. I love my husband. We should stop having sex becuz it's not looking good anymore. Please respond… say something, anything…

Jaemin's facial expressions change evidently going along with how unstable, uncomfortable and restless the message is. "I didn't get this," he mummers and bites his lip before looking at you.

You don't say anything, and simply look at him waiting for his response. You've already allowed your thinking to cloud your mind, now you wanna hear him.

His eyes are tranquil as if he's regretted nothing. It's weird because when reading the message he looked distressed but now looking into your eyes, he looks calm. He opens his mouth to speak, but when nothing comes out and he puts both phones away in his pocket, he takes a step close to you and places his hands on your cheeks and before you can retreat his lips are pressed lightly and moist your lips.

Your hand goes on his bicep and you squeeze it a little before moaning back and stepping away removing your lips from his. You're breathing a lot and clear your throat. "Jaemin –"

"I saw how you made love to Jaehyun," Jaemin's hands find their way to your neck again as he's looking down into your fearful eyes. "Can't I just try it? Just the tip?"

"Jaemin…" You can only breathe out in shock with no words.

"He was so slow, but he put his all into it. It wasn't even sex anymore, that was love,"

"Jaemin please," you get your hands off his bicep and pull yourself away from his hold. You turn around and walk away from him. You go down the step and face the open view of the night city. Your head buzzing instead of enjoying the view. "Jaemin, I don't want to lead you on anymore. I don't love you-"

"I don't care about that. I know you don't, but if we really wanna end this affair. Can't I just try it once? Make love to you instead of having sex?"

You can't even look back at him as your face is in shock. You gasp and your body jolts a little when the warmth from his sips into your back. His hands find your arms and he goes up and down making you feel warm. "Jaemin please don't make me do this,"

"I won't kiss you ever again after tonight," Jaemin whispers in your ear. His fingers run down your waist and he begins to undo the buttons on your shirt from the bottom up. Just the little warmth from your stomach has him attaching his lips to your neck. The tongue and kiss pecks can be heard and your shallow breath is all it takes for Jaemin to feel fully engrossed. You want to stop him but once he's finished with all the buttons, you reach behind your back and undo your bra.

"We're never doing this again right?"

"Right-" Jaemin is breathless and his eyes are needy with eagerness when finding your lips. You kiss him in the same way you'd kiss Jaehyun and that makes Jaemin grunt in bliss. "Make love to me as you'd do with him,"

Unlike the needy look in his eyes, Jaehyun lusts after how soft and smooth this is going. You back him up trying to get to the chair without looking. Once on the couch, you straddle him and roll your hips over his poking member and be helps you remove your shirt and your lingering bra. His warm tongue sucks on your nipple and you through your head back moaning while you dry hump him. Your shaking hips over his covered member has him squeezing his hands over your thighs.

"Should I be this needy right now?"

You smirk and take care of him rounding your hips slowly and making sure to graze him with your pussy.

"There's nothing sexier then a woman who knows to ride," Jaemin let's go of your hips and watches how you ride him and waistline moves in such a seductive way. "This is killing me, fuck,"

"You like it,"

Jaemin's eyes peer up when hearing your voice. You're not looking at him the way you did to Jaehyun, but it's close enough. This is lust to its peek.

As you ride Jaemin slowly, and you both take your time in exploring each other's bodies by removing your and his clothes, you truly don't know what comes over you when you have sex with him in the same way that Jaehyun would have with you. It's raw yet so passionate- if anything you think you've made Jaemin fall more in love with you, but you're too caught up to care. While you're riding Jaehyun drunkenly drives himself to Taeyong's house.

Due to Jaehyun being drunk he's unaware of Chae-won's confused face when seeing her boss. "Tae? It's sir,"

Taeyong is shocked to see Jaehyun but spotting his best friend looking fuzzy, he does the most rational thing and gives Jaehyun the spare bedroom to sleep in. Long time ago, perhaps at the start of Jaehyun's business, whenever Jaehyun would feel overwhelmed by work, he'd come over to Taeyong's place and talk it all out.

So as Taeyong assists Jaehyun on the bed, he's surprised by the mumble that leaves his best friend's lips. "What did you say?"

Jaehyun mumbles and gets under the blankets before speaking in a slow manner ready to sleep. "You told me that leaving her all alone and her spending time alone was scary. But I trusted her… I trust her Taeyong. It was a mistake right? Fuck… sleepy.. she didn't sleep with him… She couldn't have-" Jaehyun's eyes close and he hums out as his voice becomes more and more difficult to hear as he fades into whispers. "Shit…when was this? That fuck… Slept with my wife… fucking Jae…Min…"

While Jaehyun is drunk, you and Jaemin after having had sex in his office, retort to touching each other in the elevator when going down and even in your car he can't stop fingering you while you drive on the dark deserted streets of the night. As soon as you get to his house, your sexual drive kicks in and you and Jaemin enter into his dark home and pounce for the guest room. Haera is asleep but it doesn't stop you and Jaemin from continuously touching each other.

The room is pitch black. The only light illuminating your figures on the bed is from the open curtains of the moon light. Jaemin wraps his arm around your waist, holding you tight to him as if he feels that you might reject him. Something has changed. You can’t see him, however, you can feel that the air tonight is different.

How did you get here? Yet again, how did you end up here? No seriously, how?

You can’t see him, yet you can feel the bareness of his warm nude body sipping into your own nude backside spooning you. Yet again, you find yourself here indulging in this filthy unfaithful act in his room, with him that’s not your husband, on his bed, naked and fully collided into him allowing him to caress your figure carefully. You find yourself yet again (even after you’ve told yourself that you’d never do it again) here. In his grasp…In his arms….In his warm loving hold.

“Do you love him?” His voice is just below a whisper, between raspy and breathless yet it sounds so full of anxiety as if your answer will determine his next words. His question doesn’t make it any better, and you’re reminded that you’ve kept this unfaithful practice for more than 7 months. That’s why, he’s so attached to you. That’s why this suddenly feels all wrong. His arm pulls you closer to him, as your eyes remain fixed on the open window. Jaehyun could be home right now. The guilt you once felt for every time that you’ve left him alone, sips into you like a regular feeling that’s become normal. “Do you love your husband?” Jaemin whispers into your ear again.

No seriously, how? How has this little one time thing, led up to this moment? How did you end up here again?

End up in a bed that’s not yours, but yet feels so familiar to you. End up with a man that you’ve allowed to stretch your legs wide open and dip his head in your glory hole one too many times, knowing all too well that he’s not your husband. How did you end up agreeing to letting him lap at your dripping core with such drive and thirst, knowing all too well that neither of you should be doing this? Neither of you should be craving each other. Neither of you should be lusting after each other.

How did you end up here?

End up allowing a man you’ve hardly known to be your constant dick call and to be your escape. Night after night, either at your place or his place as your voice, moans out blissfully while you’re being riled mercilessly from behind- allowing him to grip your hair back forcing you to arch your back into his chest- where he grips his arm underneath your bouncing breast colliding your back into him so that there can be no space in between. Whispering softly into your ear, “I love you and I want you so much,”

How did you end up here?

“Do you love me?”

You snap out of your thoughts, by the new question. Thinking of how he’s been so chatty tonight. He not only confessed his love, but now he’s asking of your devotion to your husband… as well as to him. You breathe out and turn around, his arm never leaving your waist, simply adjusting as you turn to face him. His face looks different. This isn’t the face of the cocky man who prided himself about sleeping with a billionaire’s wife. This is a man who has stars in his eyes, love blinded by lust and how he wants you.

As if it can’t get worse, he’s Jaemin, the husband to your best friend.

Looking into the eyes of your best friend’s husband that you passionately fucked moments ago, you can’t believe how messy everything has gotten. It started out as a onetime thing, it turned into a constant night hook up for whenever your husband was not around- but now, after the conversations you’ve had… even you can’t deny that you’ve gotten into a deeper relationship with him.

He doesn’t seem to care about the consequences anymore as his words are true and evident in his hopeful eyes as they search your own eyes. He calls your name gently. “I want you.”

How did you end up here?

"Jaemin," You moan as he pounds you from behind. "We're never doing this again."

•

After you drop him off at home, you're devastated when going back home. You get shocked when Taeyong is seated in the living room. "Where the hell were you?"

Your face is coated red and your hold your heart. "Jaehyun asked me to come and pick him up from work. I was there but he wasn't, I looked around and just decided to come home," is the only lie that pulls up the top of your head.

"Apparently he was drunk. He's upstairs." Taeyong gets up and walks past you towards the door. "Night."

You look at the clock and see the time. 03:34.

1 month later

"Oh my god!" You cover your mouth in pure happiness when a familiar man steps onto the built stage in your backyard, and he points his hand at you. "Oh my god Jae! Is that- Jae you didn't! Oh my god! It's Nakomato Yuta!"

You as well as all the other ladies in your backyard cheer and squeal for the famous heartthrob Japanese singer.

"Happy birthday to the lovely Mrs Jung Y/n," The famous celebrity, Yuta charmingly smiles in your direction. "When Mr Jung Jaehyun called me and told me he's got a beautiful wife who loves my music and records, I was touched because I didn't think he could get a wife firstly. He was a geek in high school and knew nothing about the type of music I made. So hearing that my music has influenced your wife, you Mrs Jung, truly enticed me into believing your husband has extraordinary taste. Seeing you Mrs Jung, seeing your beauty that radiates into him and into everyone here makes me happy because this is the type of songs I write about. You always need someone in your life. And I'm especially happy for you, to be a part of this birthday special. Thank you for having me this afternoon, in your beautiful backyard, my prayer is that your birthday may bloom into one of prosperity in all aspects of your life. Your beauty is captivating me, so I prepared this song especially for you, dedicated to you, and requested to you. Thank you to the crowd as well, for joining in on this special day, to this special woman. Sing along if you know the song, t's called All worn out,"

Already by the break of the first piano chord has all the ladies screaming and abandoning their dates/husbands/boyfriends and racing to the front. The soft violin mixes well into the speakers around and the mic is placed beautifully as Yuta sings the lyrics.

You and Haera hold onto each other while swaying side to side and singing. "Hold me down. I'm not the one to stay around. I'm lost again. It's getting kind of turbulent. Pull the roses out. The stems look sad and wilted now. You need a friend. In the heat of it. Heat of it!"

When the soft rock plays you and Haera bang your heads softly before laughing and looking to each other giving warm hugs around. Looking around the crowd you're happy when seeing your friends and family all in the backyard enjoying the moment just as much as you. You're grateful that for each and everyone of them. You'd never expect to see them on this day, but when Jaehyun took you out early in the morning as a special birthday morning, you were completely clueless to come back home and the whole house was packed with your family as well as friend's who all came to celebrate your birthday.

Yuta sings a couple more songs, and listening to his voice is so cosy- and being out of character for your rich friends, the crowd listening to Yuta's smooth and soft voice, begins to sit ok the grass just listening to him sing. It's like a private concert for the ladies, and some of the guys who enjoy the song.

For the other guys, they're watching football on TV and cheering on the team that's winning. For Jaehyun though, he can't get his eyes off of your elated face that looks like it's seconds away from breaking from how jubilated you are. The skies turn dark as the twinkle lights scattered in the backyard light up and create a blissful ambiance. Jaehyun's heart breaks a little when he sees Jaemin leaving the other groups of man and walk over to the ladies on the ground. Jaehyun watches as Jaemin scoots himself in between Haera and you a d sits close to you but has his attention on his wife.

Jaehyun still doesn't know whether he dreamt it all or not, whether he was too drunk to pull reality away from his dreams, but seeing you turn to look at Jaemin and then smiling makes Jaehyun feel bad all over again.

"Come on Jae, I don't think she'd do that to you," Jaehyun turns his head slowly to Taeyong who takes a position next to him. That night when he drunk his pain away and made it to Taeyong's door, Taeyong was surprised by all that Jaehyun said.

Jaehyun faces Yuta again and listens to the lyrics he sings. "Why are his heartbreak songs so successful? And true." Jaehyun breathes out and shakes his head before getting his eyes back to you and Jaemin… Thankfully Jaemin has his arms wrapped around Haera, because if they weren't then it would've played with Jaehyun's mind some more.

"Jae," Taeyong sighs and pulls Jaehyun away from the scene. "This is depressing. You haven't once smiled truly ever since that day you waltzed in drunk into my home,"

Jaehyun finds himself in the kitchen with Taeyong taking a glass of water. "I'm not trying to be negative and unrealistic, but what if it wasn't a dream? Then what would I be smiling for? My wife is cheating on me with-"

"She's not cheating." Taeyong immediately cuts and looks around lowering his voice hoping that nobody heard him. "Damn. Get a grip on yourself. It's her birthday for hell sake. Have you caught them being intimate together?"

"No but-"

"No is the final answer. With the amount of work pressure she's under, and the amount of work Jaemin's been doing, you really think they'd go behind your back? No man. Besides you said that he's a mediator between his wife and yours. Why would he cheat on Haera? That fucking bitch gives great head and I doubt he'd leave her."

"Great head?" Jaehyun furrows his brows. "Am I missing something?"

Taeyong grunts and looks displeased. "Got head from her once or twice when you and Y/n were still in the dating phase,"

"I'm not even going to comment on that," Jaehyun drinks the water and immediately speaks on something different to avoid going back on the topic of his relationship. There's absolutely nothing that Taeyong can say to sway him from his suspicious nature between you and Jaemin. The only proof Jaehyun has…is the text message. The only problem is that he's not quite sure if the text message was real, because after drinking a whole bunch of things made the text message a bit incoherent and Jaehyun doesn't know what he read. But he knows he read something that upset him. He remembers:

You: What we did that night… mistake right? We should stop having sex. Please respond… say something, anything…

It's a bit unclear which parts of the message was fake and what was real, but Jaehyun surely remembers reading something along those lines.

"You and Chae-won seem to be getting it on. What happened to your playboy record?"

Taeyong's smile makes Jaehyun smile. It's crazy what the honeymoon phase of couples who want to commit to each other can do. "I feel like I'm on cloud 9 with her. She's great in bed yeah, but she's great as a person too. Smart, dedicated, persistent, and she's so pure and lovely. I'm the second guy to ever have sex with her. The first time she had it, was with her uncle, he molested her. And then me. Technically to her I'm her second, but to me I'm her first. I won't ever allow herself to think of that disgusting man as her first. Either way, she's got a good heart. And I don't know why, but it's healing being with her. I love- wow." Taeyong breathes out and smiles a little.

"That's TMI for me," Jaehyun lightly smiles. "You love her?"

"Is that weird to say? It's been 6 months with her. Love is way too fast right?"

"I feel in love with Y/n on day 2 of us saying hi for the first time." Jaehyun chuckles modestly. "It's not too fast, just make sure she's not boarding her traumas on you and you're not boarding your fuckboy ways on her,"

"I don't mind boarding her traumas, as long as it helps her heal then I don't mind,"

Like all epic nights, it finally comes to an end with Yuta playing his last song, the guests singing a little happy birthday song, cake and eating time before they start leaving by the strike of 10pm. Thankfully with a few workers over, they clean the house spotless and by 11pm everyone is out the house, only leaving you and Jaehyun together alone in bed.

For some weeks and days, something has been off between you and Jaehyun. You don't know what it is, you wish you knew, but you don't. Jaehyun doesn't seem like himself and it's bothering you. You keep trying and prompting him to open up, you give your all in trying your hardest to get him to even talk to you, but yet he zones out or quiets down.

He doesn't kiss you anymore, and if he does it's the weakest thing ever light as a feather. He doesn't hold you anymore, if he does it's only when someone is around. He doesn't even talk you a lot like he used, and talking was always the base of your relationship. To have him coming back home and ignoring you purposely is something that surely has gotten you worried.

Tonight is no different when you finish washing your face up in the bathroom. You enter the dark room to see him already sleeping with his bed side lamp off but yours is on. You sigh and get closer to the bed. Laying on it, you close the lamp and face his broad back.

"Jae," You whisper in a tiny voice.

He doesn't respond, but you know he's awake as his back stiffens a little before he breathes normally.

"Thanks for today. You made my entire day special, and I love you for bringing Yuta over,"

He nods his head. "I love you too,"

"Can I..hold you?"

Jaehyun sadly sighs and nods his head. He hears you moving closer before your tiny arms wrap around him. It hurt him a lot at the mere thought that you were cheating on him. With your beauty that was enticing to anyone who met you, he never worried that one day you'd cheat on him because you've always shown how devoted you were to him. Cheating was never something that ever crossed his mind, because he trusted you a lot to believe that you wouldn't cheat on him. But now, he doesn't even know what to think.

"Are you mad at me?" Your tiny voice fills the quiet dark night air again.

Jaehyun shakes his head. "No." His hand goes over yours that's on his abdomen. "Are you mad at me?"

"Yes," you respond in a heartbeat still with a whisper voice. "Because you're mad at me and I don't know why,"

Hearing you say that only makes Jaehyun clinch his jaw and huff leaving your hand alone. In fact he gets so bothered that he pulls your hand away from him. "Just sleep. It was a long day." It bothered him at the thought that really you could be lying to him every time you sleep with Jaemin and he wouldn't even know.

Jaemin was in his office that day. If Jaemin hadn't left to use the test room then maybe Jaehyun wouldn't have know that you and Jaemin had been texting. When Jaemin left he left his phone, and just in time his phone lit up. Jaehyun was going to ignore it, until he saw that it was a message from you. Furrowing his brows he looked again but the screen went off. Feeling paranoid of seeing your name, Jaehyun wanted to make sure that he didn't see your name and that it was someone else instead. But when he sneakily picked up the phone, he was surprised that there was no password and that it instantly opened up to your messages. His eyes widened when he read the message. His jaws clutched and he couldn't keep his raging emotions in check. He deleted the message immediately and just before he could open up the images that Jaemin sent you- He heard Jaemin flushing in the bathroom.

Setting the phone down, Jaehyun calmly packed up his things. Not even caring that he wasn't done with the work and helping Jaemin he got up just as Jaemin came out.

"Are you leaving sir?"

Hearing Jaemin speak only made Jaehyun want to throw Jaemin out the window in rage. But instead he shook his head and packed up. "I think you can handle without me. I'll head home."

Jaehyun didn't know what he read. Did his mind play a trick on him? Or did he really read… Instead of going home he called Haera. It's a number he rarely called, but it was an emergency. Haera was at Jaemin's club. Turns out he appointed her to management position to handle it while he was at work. He went there with the intentions to find out what Haera knew, but the moment he got there and they offered him a special- he said: "Fuck it" and began drinking. Shot after shot, bottle after bottle, Jaehyun didn't want to think at all.

Did you cheat on him once? Or was it an occuring thing?

"Jae?"

Jaemin snaps out of his head and hums.

"What's wrong? Please tell me," your voice sounds so broken and it hurts him that you sound that way, but it hurts to know what you did. "I want to know what I did wrong,"

"You really wanna know?" Jaehyun's voice is gruff and he clutches his jaw and whispers. "Okay." He turns and his back is flat on the bed while his gaze is up on the ceiling. "1 month 3 weeks and a day ago, you put on a tight dress I'd never seen before, you had no underwear on and we went to a club owned by Jaemin. In fact, it dates back to 6 months ago when we made love on the living room floor and you got a call from Haera's husband, Jaemin. No, not only that, but the first time I stayed home for a full day we went out to eat and we were met by Jaemin and his wife. I remember you being startled and looked uneasy, I thought it was because of Haera, but…" Jaehyun's jaws tremble in annoyance, he pinches his forehead and squeezes his eyes shut and breathes out. All incidents with Jaemin flood in his head. "You had no underwear on when we went to that club, Jaemin called you late at night after we made love, he said you liked it rough and I fucked you out of anger that night- I hurt you because I was insecure of my own husband skills, but yet you… He knew you liked it rough because he fucked you didn't he?"

The room falls into a deafening silence.

"Taeyong said when I arrived at his house drunk, he took me home and you weren't there. You came back around 3 a.m. Where the fuck were you at 3 fucking a.m.? Hm?" Jaehyun can't open his eyes and it hurts saying it all out loud. Hearing your silence Jaehyun grunts. "Fuck it. I shouldn't have said anything."

"Jae-"

"Did you sleep with Jaemin?"

"Jaehyun please-" your voice gets ruffled up in emotions of sorrow. "Listen-"

"It's all I need to know did you sleep with Jaemin? Yes or no."

"Jae-"

"Answer the damn question. Did you have sex with Jaemin? Did he fuck you? Did you allow him to fuck you? To see you naked? To have you all to himself while he fucked you roughly? You and your horny body. Did he sleep with you? Just answer me!" Jaehyun is off the bed and glaring at you while you kneel down on the bed and ruffle your fingers together. Jaehyun's eyes get teary and he pants out in frustration seeing you like that. "Answer it." Jaehyun whispers.

You sniff back and you blurt out. "I did."

Jaehyun's teeth sink into his bottom lip. "How many times?" He whispers. "If it was once I'll get it. I wasn't around when you needed me. If it was twice…three times ….four times ….how many times did you guys fuck?"

"Jaehyun-"

"How many times Y/n?"

"I- I don't know, I can't remember but-"

Jaehyun's hands go all the way up to his head and he runs his fingers through his head. He can't believe how ears and he doesn't want to hear you anymore. He gets his slippers on and walks out the room blocking your words as you 'try to explain' the casual words of: it meant nothing. I love you. It didn't mean anything. We stopped. Jaehyun doesn't want to hear any of it.

He remembers watching movies where the characters would face this situations and he'd think to himself that he'd forgive you if you did cheat on him, but reality is often disappointing when it hits. He can't forgive you, not now at least. You slept with Jaemin one too many times. And even as you're holding him and begging him not to go Jaehyun gets out the door and walks off leaving you crying in hysterically on the ground with no shoes. Just in time they both spot Haera also in a nightgown and getting out of her car looking pissed. Taking a few steps to your crying figure Jaehyun watches as Haera slaps you across the face.

"I'm pregnant Y/n! How could you do this to me! How could you sleep-" Haera drops to the ground and weeps out causing you shock. "How could you sleep with my husband. You bitch!"

-

"Taeyong's not home sir." Chae-won nervously says. "He went to pick up some papers at work sir,"

"Can I come in?" Jaehyun's voice is bleak and broken and Chae-won has never felt more bad for her boss.

"Of course sir," She moves aside and let's Jaehyun enter the house. "Is everything alright? We just came home from Y/n's party and you looked okay, what's wrong?"

Jaehyun says nothing and makes it in the kitchen. He sits on one of the stools and sinks his head in his hands. By chance, Chae-won begins making some coffee. "How do you know he's not cheating on you?"

Chae-won's ears perk up when hearing Jaehyun. "Pardon sir?"

"He's out at this till this time, getting so called paperwork? So how do you know he's not cheating on you?" Jaehyun repeats again before looking up into Chae-won's bewildered eyes. "He was notorious for sleeping around. I even warned you that he's the type of guy to love one night stands. So how do you know he's not cheating?"

"Sir-"

"She's beautiful right? My wife. I never thought…she's beautiful so I should've known,"

"Sir-"

Jaehyun gushes out grieving in his head. "I should've never read that text,"

"You found out she cheated on you," Chae-won says. "She stopped though. Or I'd like to think that she stopped,"

Jaehyun's eyes look up deadly into Chae-won's eyes.

"I saw her once, but when I found out she was your wife I told her not to do it again. And I believe she didn't."

"The world is not as innocent as you." Jaehyun's huffs when remembering how Haera slapped you. If his secretary knows, chances are that Taeyong knows and it's why he kept playing the denial game even though all the evidence was in front of him. "I wonder how she felt." Jaehyun gets up.

Surprising Chae-won, Jaehyun walks forward and corners her against the counter with his arms on each side of her.

"When you kiss Taeyong how do you feel?"

"Sir?"

"How could've been kissing another woman before you, but you still kiss him,"

"Sir I don't think-"

"You're a woman so tell me," Jaehyun's eyes get dark, clouded in rage, sadness and frustration. "Tell me how does this feel. When another man who isn't your man touches you here,"

Chae-won gasps when Jaehyun places his hand over her breast and palms it. "Sir-"

"Does it feel good?" He dips his neck down and his lips brush her neck before his tongue sucks on her. "Does it feel good?"

Chae-won nervously trembles and whispers. "Sir please don't-"

Jaehyun's ears go deaf when his other hand goes down her body and his two fingers sink inbetween her legs covered in pajama pants. He rubs over he clothed pussy and she trembles. She moans out in pure fear and her hands hold tightly onto his bicep. Jaehyun gets turned on by your heart and continues to kiss you. "Would it feel good if I called you baby?"

"Sir-"

"What the fuck?"

It takes one hard punch to get Jaehyun off of a tear filled and trembling Chae-won. Chae-won blurts out a cry just as Taeyong immediately holds onto her and hugs her. Like a baby, he carries her and gets out the kitchen leaving Jaehyun bleeding out through his nose and mouth. Jaehyun touches the bruised part of his cheek and chuckles. "Feels good doesn't it," He gets back on the floor and covers his eyes. "Is that what you felt Y/n? Scared? Or where you like me…and enjoyed it just a little?"

•

3 months later

The new secretary is devoted to her job, just as much as she's devoted to her wardrobe and appearance. From wearing thee most tight and short dresses to puffing her face in such seductive make up and her fragrance always gets Jaehyun's attention that he can't help but just look at her. Every time she bends over, purposely sprays the new collection of perfume on her chest and moves closer for Jaehyun to smell sets him on fire. The way she ties her up and looks at him like she's undressing him with her eyes turns Jaehyun on every time. In fact he loves going to work and spending the longest of hours there just being with her. But despite the advances from her corner, Jaehyun doesn't respond back even though he wants to. Even though he wants to smell and kiss her, and hold her body tight while he undresses her just makes him hard - and he gets frustrated because it's just all in his head.

He wants to know how long will it take for him to finally break and give up on being faithful to you. How long did it take for you to come to a conclusion to sleep with Jaemin? Did you put up a fight or did you willingly allow Jaemin to just touch you?

He wonders how long it took for Taeyong to find a heart and love another person with it? And how long will it take for him to give up on Chae-won if she had to cheat? Because Taeyong was once a heartbreaker, would he be heartbroken when his lover cheats too?

Once Haera got pregnant, did it sink in Jaemin's head that he no longer was allowed to sniff outside? And have lustful eyes elsewhere? How long did it take for him to realize that his family is all he needs to know that he should've never slept with another woman?

In Jaehyun's knowledge: he and you were a couple, Jaemin and Haera were a couple and Taeyong and Chae-won were a couple- that means there were 3 lovers, but Jaemin cheated on Haera, you cheated on him- that means there were two affairs and then in the end there was a betrayal. He knows for sure that he was broken, Haera could've been broken too and Taeyong hated his guts for what he did to Chae-won. But in all that, who broke first?

Was it you? And then Jaemin? Who broke who first? Was it Jaemin or was it you?

Because as damage control Taeyong, Haera with her unborn child, Chae-won and himself were damage control to the affair of Jaemin and you and they all had to suffer one way or another. Whether it was by loss of friendship, or cutting ties - the damage was done and everyone was left heartbroken.

Even though Jaehyun was still together with you, and Jaemin still with Haera and Taeyong still with Chae-won — Taeyong and Jaehyun lost their friendship because(1) Taeyong couldn't trust Jaehyun (2) Jaehyun hurt Chae-won (3) He didn't feel like working with Jaehyun as Jaehyun was in an "off" phase. He also made Chae-won cut all ties with the Fragrance company as it didn't seem that Jaehyun was in the right mind.

Haera cut all ties with you and because she cut ties with you, Jaemin too cut ties with you for good and thus resulting in the loss of friendship.

So while Jaehyun lost Taeyong and you lost Haera, it was hard to face each other. Jaehyun couldn't stand to look at you. You were now really lonely. Without Jaehyun sharing his business details as well as personal emotions, he bottled up so much and became a changed person, in a negative way. Without friendship in your corner or even a husband to pay mind to you, you felt absolutely hopeless and it got you feeling depressed. You've been trying for the past months to get Jaehyun attention back to you and for you both to speak but…the damage created a wound inside of both of you.

Jaehyun wants to know what changed inside of him for him to become this way?

He abandoned coming home early because he couldn't stand the sight of you. He slept on the couch because he didn't feel comfortable sharing the same bed knowing that Jaemin could've slept with you there too. He sent you money regularly but you guys hardly spoke to each other. After that night, work became his refuge camp once again. He stayed longer merely because his new secretary was an eye candy and her advances would increase by the hour and she got more bold.

Could it be that because you cheated on him that Jaehyun found no reason to feel bad to cheat too?

Or was it because of Jaemin? Jaemin was still in the company and he still worked with Jaehyun but there was a strain.

"Will you fire me?" Jaemin once asked when they were in the elevator.

Jaehyun merely even looked interested. "It hasn't affected your work so why should I fire you? We're in the third quarter and that wouldn't be a smart move. With Taeyong gone, your skills have improved vastly."

Because of breaking up with his best friend, because of violating another woman, Taeyong wanted nothing to do with Jaehyun at all and that affected his business greatly. With Taeyong gone, Jaemin proved he was worth the keeping. But since it bothered Jaehyun, he asked: "So you had sex with Y/n."

Jaemin's heart feels tugged. After Haera told him she was pregnant and he confessed that he had been sleeping with you, he never had the courage to face because so much tension had built and relationships had been ruined. So talking about you makes him feel bad, you didn't deserve this. He can only imagine what you're going through.

Jaehyun unconscious asks when Jaemin doesn't answer. "If you want her, you can have you know."

Jaemin's brows furrows and he peers at Jaehyun. Jaehyun has no emotion and looked dead inside and outside, especially his tone of being nonchalant like be doesn't care anymore. "I can't do that, she's your wife. I shouldn't have-"

"I don't care of what you shouldn't have done, I can't stand being in my own house knowing you and best had sex there."

"I've had her in other places, you know." The bitter smirk spreads across his lips. "All over your precious billionaire office, in the company elevator where you're standing, in a outdoor cafe in public, in my club in the bathroom- double times, I've even had her at my place twice and even in your car. So will you stop coming to work, or stop riding in the elevator and stop using your car all because we had sex there too?"

The conversation happened weeks ago, but it's Jaemin's words that always rile Jaehyun up in pushing the border between himself and his secretary.

So when Eunha enters the office in her tight and short body con red dress with a buttoned down blouse, she smiles at Jaehyun before walking down to the lounge area and bending down all the way till her ass cheeks are exposed revealing the red thong- and Jaehyun's mind filled with Jaemin's words prompt him to tell Eunha to stay a little while. "Why don't you have lunch with me?"

"I'd love to sir," Eunha takes a seat on the couch and turns her eyes to him. "Aren't you coming?"

Lust is in the air and just as Jaehyun is about to join Eunha on the couch he writes down in his notebook:

Scented Poison

That could be the name of his new fragrance launch. And when he sits down next to Eunha and moments later has his head wedged in between her core- he knows how the scent will smell especially when enjoying the scent of Eunha.

Jaehyun thought he'd feel bad for sucking Eunha's breast and fucking her raw without a condom, especially when he thought about you. But he was surprised that he found himself smirking and chuckling. Haera always told you about a businessman sleeping with his secretary. "I guess that came true,"

Taglist: @markleelately jddky notevenheretbh1 bellamendoza evepsycheandbluebirdswife fadingyouthunknown idkbutlukpop tattedhyun svtdose hyacinth-tree galorehearts f4irynono momwwndmxmff dalivanmagritte jovilymalfoy synnocence pieberry00 ohbrooke prettywoojae jaeminfication sehoonsworld haeuniee jccv svtf1lms vsszn aegablog dyndlpn starlightwish fashion-addictedd v3rtexx seamlessheart emvrd milkisgod weiyingsgoldencore moa-carat-addict akkindless pjw04 starillusion13 funkycatbruh entertainmentnabi baobeirenchin032313 hendowie mahm00n15 fullsunld twilightwei r24priv05 yutazen27 6-ucci yuneeeee glitterybarbarianwitch jaeminfuture

[peanutpinet]

You Belong with Me - Idol! Jaemin x staff! fem reader

A/N: I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before but if you follow me on my Instagram, you might have seen my Instagram reel where I mentioned that Jaemin is definitely my comfort idol. For some reason, no matter what I’m feeling that day; whether it is good or bad, whenever I see Jaemin’s comforting yet encouraging messages, seeing him work so hard to make nctzens happy yet he himself is able to be so mature and still prioritizing others before him is just another level of my respect towards him and it just brings comfort to me and hopefully to many other nctzens

Dedication: To all nctzens who feel lost and anxious, this one is for you

Main Pairing: Idol! Na Jaemin x staff fem reader x slight idol! ex Jaehyun

Warnings: mentions of cheating, “unintentional” cheating act, violence, swearing, angst, slight possessiveness, light fluff, comforting scenes, anxiety

Additional Info: This is a slight spin-off of “Try Again” (a Jaehyun angst fic)

Disclaimer: this story is completely fiction and not a defective representative of what the members are actually like. Please take everything with a grain of salt

[08:16pm] - don’t expect too much. Don’t let your guard down. Everything seems too good to be true. Those were all the warnings that your mind was trying to tell you. But just like a hypnotized person, you were blinded by the good things of being together with someone whom you thought would be your significant other till death do you both apart.

It wasn’t until it was too good to be true that it instantly went downhill. Just as you were reaching your one-year anniversary with Jaehyun. You thought that your life was finally being put together and that you can finally see the end of the tunnel as if you were on a train and finally reaching your destination until the train took a “wrong” turn.

You, Renjun and Chenle were going around the company after a photoshoot for a Chinese magazine when you heard an unfamiliar female voice was ringing around the NCT floor’s hallways; confusing you, Chenle and Renjun.

You didn’t think much about it because you were more focused on surprising your boyfriend of almost 1 year. You were more than thankful for the universe to be able to let you to have such a caring and supportive boyfriend. Someone who was willing to risk his career for you. To take care of you when you yourself never did. To be able to give you more than you could have ever wished or hoped.

But the universe clearly had other plans because when you made a turn, there you saw your boyfriend’s back with an unfamiliar woman right in front of him who was kissing him and your boyfriend didn’t even pull away but you felt that your heart did.

Lost for words, you turn around to avoid the scene unravelling before you as you walked away with Renjun quickly following you whereas Chenle took a quick look at what you saw before following both you and Renjun.

When the three of you have gotten to one of the unused recording studios did you finally break down in front of your two friends. You dropped to the ground pulling your knees close to your chest as you slowly sobbed that you passed out.

When you did regain consciousness, you noticed you were in one of Chenle’s guest bedrooms since you have stayed at his house a couple of times just to hang out with the other dreamies. Sighing, you thought that it was all just a nightmare but when you grabbed your phone and Jaehyun’s parents’ message was the first thing you saw, you remembered that you were currently living with Jaehyun’s parents and that it was already late at night.

You quickly texted Jaehyun’s parents that you had some work to do so suddenly that you decided to stay over at Chenle’s place because the shoot ran pretty late and you had to quickly go over the shots and video before forwarding it to the head content manager. Lucky enough, Jaehyun’s parents believed you and told you to get more than enough rest and to let them know whenever you were free because they wanted to take you out.

Sighing, you take a deep breath on how to face Jaehyun and confront him. Frustrated, confused, sad, all those negative emotions started to swallow you down. Especially whenever you close your eyes, your mind would consciously replay the scene over and over again even though your heart is still holding on to that last bit of hope that it was all just some misunderstanding.

As your thoughts slowly tried to take control, you started to sob once again until you felt a warm arm wrapped around you. Startled, you almost pulled away while also kicking the person but when the person’s voice came out, your whole body immediately recognizes it and slowly lower your guard because who else would be able to calm your nerve-wracking state other than Na Jaemin himself.

“It’s not good to check your phone in the dark” Jaemin softly pointed out, taking your phone out of your hand and placing it on the bedside table

“D-did Chenle or Renjun…” you asked but Jaemin beat you to it

“Chenle told us in the dreamies’ group chat. Don’t worry, nothing was spilled to the other group chats. Rest assured that it’s just us that know” Jaemin softly replied, patting your head as you sigh in relief

“How about we go have some dinner first? You probably haven’t eaten since morning. Chenle made some hotpot for us to eat. Do you want me to bring the food to you or…” Jaemin asked but I held his hand

“No. It’s alright. Let’s go out to eat with the others. It would be rude of me to ask you to bring the food that Chenle made. I’ll be ok” you reassured Jaemin who extended his arm for you to grab

Both you and Jaemin then head out of the room and saw the other Dream members in the dining room, gathering around. Renjun, Mark and Haechan were playing whereas Chenle and Jeno were cooking and Jisung just brought out some of the cooked meat onto the dining table.

“Oh?! Noona?! You’re awake?” Jisung stated, putting down the plate of food, grabbing the other dreamies’ attention

“A-are you okay? You passed out for a long time” Renjun asked, walking towards you along with the others

“Y-yeah. I’m fine. Thank you, Renjun, Chenle, for bringing me back here” you replied back, hoping that none of the dreamies would question you just yet

“Hey, why is everyone standing? C’mon, let’s sit and eat. Chenle and Jeno worked hard in cooking for us tonight” Mark stated as everyone sat at the living room and ate together because the dining room was too small

“Thank you for cooking, Chenle, Jeno” you stated as you sat on the couch, Jaemin handing you a plate of rice and meat already

“No worries about 姐姐. Eat lots of it. No dieting in this household” Chenle joked, dividing the hotpot equally

You were more than thankful that you were closer to dreamies’ age because at times like this, you just feel more comfortable talking with them or even doing some mundane things with them because it reminds you of the times when you were in school and was having a sleepover with your friends.

Being around with friends around your age who were not judging was another level of comfort and it even made you forget about what actually happened until Haechan brought it up which the other dreamies glared at him.

“So, did you actually see Jaehyun-hyung’s face or was it from behind?” Haechan asked, earning a glare and smack from Mark and Renjun

“Dude. Can you be more sympathetic?!” Mark scolded Haechan

“Ya!! You think she was there alone? Don’t you remember who brought her back here?” Chenle argued

“Whatttt? I was just curious. I’m sorry okay!” Haechan tried to defend himself. “You’re lucky that (y/n) is nice. If it were me, I would duck tape your mouth and only open it when you have to sing” Renjun threatened

“Hyung, I don’t think that we should be arguing or even touch on that subject. Noona is probably still sensitive about this…” Jisung tried to stop his hyungs from arguing. “See, even Jisung understands the situation” Chenle argued back

“YAAAAA” Jaemin growled, grabbing everyone’s attention, slightly scaring you but Jaemin was quick to wrap his arm around your smaller body, rubbing your shoulder with his thumb. “Can’t you all how uncomfortable (y/n) is with all of you arguing? Hasn’t she gone through enough today?” Jaemin reminded the others who instantly fell silent and apologised

“I’m sorry (y/n). I shouldn’t have asked because it should be you who would tell us first whenever you’re ready” Haechan apologised and you shook your head

“It’s alright. Jaemin-a, don’t get angry at them. Everyone but Chenle and Renjun were just curious” you defended the other dreamies as Jaemin sighed, giving your shoulder a light squeeze to let you know that he’s here to support and defend you

“But yea. Though I did see his face from a side, I didn’t get a closer look at what actually happened. Maybe, I was looking at a wrong angle and just assuming….” you started but Chenle was quick to correct you

“You weren’t hallucinating, 姐姐. I also saw what happened after you turned and left. It was clearly him and that weird girl was clearly kissing him but he didn’t pull away” Chenle bluntly stated

“Ya! Zhong Chenle! Enough okay?! It’s been a long day. Let her breathe” Renjun scolded the younger Chinese as Jisung tried to get both his hyungs to calm down

“Renjun. It’s okay. Chenle is right. I wasn’t hallucinating even if I wanted to. What happened, happened. I just have to accept it” you softly muttered, all the dreamies looked sad and worried upon hearing what you said

“Let’s not discuss that further unless you want to, okay?” Mark mentioned as you nodded slowly and all the other dreamies prepared the living room to be a mini theatre

Jisung got to pick the movie because everyone was sure that he wouldn’t really choose any kind of romance film. In the end, you guys ended up watching Spirited Away because it was one of your comfort films. Towards the end of the film, everyone was slowly drowsing off and you then suggested to Chenle that everyone should stay over.

Though you were alright with sharing with any of the dream members, Jaemin debated that it was not right and you should have your own space after what happened but you argued back that it was pretty late and you felt bad that you made the others stay and if anyone had to sleep like a can of sardines, you would instantly feel worse

“It’s really alright if the rest of us have to sleep in Chenle’s room or even on the floor” Jaemin debated

“I know you guys might be alright with it. But not me. The other guest bedroom isn’t as big and probably could only fit 3 people max. Chenle’s bed could also only fit another person which leaves 2 more of you and the bed I have can fit 2 more” you argued back as the rest of the dreamies were far too lost in the debate

“one of us can sleep on the couch. I wouldn’t mind doing so. Or the other 2 can sleep on the living room couch. Perhaps even on the floor. Really. We’re practically used to it” Jaemin reasoned with you but you stood your ground

“Jaemin, if you or anyone sleeps on the couch or floor without some surface between your body and the floor, you’re going to wake up with a sore back and I don’t want that to happen to any of you. 2 of you sleep on my bed and that’s final or I’ll sneak out to the living room to sleep on the floor if any of you don’t sleep on my bed” you argued and Jaemin sighed, pulling some of his hair out of frustration

“Fine. But that 2 people should be me and Jeno because I would never touch you and I’ll be between you and Jeno so he wouldn’t touch you either” Jaemin made his final statement

“I don’t mind either of you all because I trust you guys. Now let’s just get ready for bed” you mentioned, helping tidy up the shared blanket that you guys used

“姐姐, if you’re hungry or can’t sleep in the middle of the night, we bought some of your favourite biscuits and snacks in the fridge and cupboard. Feel free to take and eat anything, alright? Good night” Chenle mentioned and you thank him

Right before you, Jaemin and Jeno head to your room, Mark called out for you. “Hey, (y/n). Don’t worry so much about what happened alright? Me and Haechan won’t say anything to the 127 hyungs but we will try to find out what happen. Don’t feel obligated to have everything figured out because you’re not alone, kay? Also, don’t feel obligated to tell everyone about your situation and that includes hyung’s parents. Take care of yourself first and foremost because I know that everything will be alright” Mark rambled whilst patting your head and slowly wiping the tears that were threatening to spill like a waterfall

After the short talk with Mark, Jaemin wrapped his arm around your shoulder and directed you back to your room where Jeno was already setting up some pillows for him and Jaemin.

“You alright, (y/n)?” Jeno asked as he saw you sniffle

“Am okay, Jen. Sorry, let me just go to the bathroom and change” you replied, grabbing your things and heading to the bathroom to change

Once you’ve changed, you saw Jaemin and Jeno were talking on the floor which made you worry that they were planning to sleep on the floor until Jaemin stated what was on your mind.

“I promise you that we’re not sleeping on the floor. We were just talking down here because it would be rude for us to sit on your bed” Jaemin mentioned and you just chuckle at his politeness

“It’s not rude at all. C’mon, let’s just sleep” you mentioned as you went towards the side of the bed that was closer to the wall

Both Jaemin and Jeno followed you shortly with Jaemin laying in between you and Jeno and Jeno who was sleeping closer towards the other edge of the bed that was closer to the floor.

“Jeno, are you alright over there? You guys can move closer, it’s still quite spacious” you mentioned, peeking your head as Jaemin softy pushed your head back down, indicating you to just lay down and sleep

“I’m fine (y/n), don’t worry about me. Thanks for letting us sleep on your bed. Good night” Jeno mentioned right at the same time Jaemin turned his head and faced you

“You sure you’re alright? You know that I’m here whenever you need a talk or vent out your feelings” Jaemin softly mentioned, stroking your hair, looking at you softly

“I know, Jaem. Thank you. For taking care of me today. You should rest. You have a full day of schedules while I have to try and ask your manager if it’s alright that I get assigned more work for you guys instead of the others” you yawned because of how soft Jaemin was patting your head

“I’ll tell my manager about that. You just FYI to him. Get some time off and just figure it out slowly. If you want to go back to your home country and take a break from here, I’ll help you. Just know that you're not alone” Jaemin cooed at your sleepy state

Once Jaemin was sure that you were asleep, he leaned closer and gave a soft peck on your forehead. “Whenever you find yourself needing someone to lean onto, come to me. Let me be the one to take care of you as you’ve taken care of all of us” Jaemin whispered, softly stroking your cheek until he fell asleep as well

For the next few days, Jaemin and the dreamies have been helping you talk to the NCT manager to help you switch your job to work more for dreamies which resulted in you not having to meet any of the other NCT members, especially Jaehyun. Not only did Jaemin help you to get your mind off of the incident, but he has also been helping you to finish some paperwork for the company so that you can go back to your home country and work for the SM branch there.

Unfortunately, the universe was once again disagreeing with you and have you meet the person that you have avoided for the past week, Jaehyun.

You had just finished one of dreamies’ new photoshoot and was waiting for them outside of the studio when you saw Johnny, Jaehyun and Doyoung walking in the hallway which made you turn around and about to avoid them but Johnny had seen you first.

“Oh?! (y/n)?! Is that you?!” you heard Johnny mentioned. Footsteps coming closer to you when suddenly Johnny was right in front of you, blocking your way and crouching down to see your face

“It is you. It’s been a while. Are you okay?” Johnny asked and you shyly looked towards the floor

Before you could answer, a familiar deep baritone voice called out to you, sending an alert to your body. “(y/n)…where have you been?! I tried to reach out to you for the past few days. Do you know how worried I have been?!” Jaehyun’s voice was firm and was holding both your shoulders to face him

Instead of replying to Jaehyun, you kept looking down, avoiding both his and Johnny’s gaze. “Why are you avoiding me?! Answer me (y/n). My parents told me that you have been working overtime. Is that true? You know that I can tell the manager if you are overloaded with work. Don’t ignore me, (y/n). Did I do something to upset you?” Jaehyun ranted, gripping his hair out of frustration

Did something wrong? You were already upset about what Jaehyun did but now, you were equally frustrated and annoyed at him. Sure, it was wrong of you to not tell him or his parents about your whereabouts but did Jaehyun even consider the chance that you know what he did?! Frustrated with the whole situation, you failed to contain your tears and it spilled out before anyone could even comment anything.

“(y/n)…let’s go have some lunch toge—hyung?! What did you do?!” Haechan interrupted and rushed to your side, slightly pushing Jaehyun away from you

“Haechan-ah…” you cried. “Ya, Lee Haechan, what’s wrong with you? I didn’t do anything. Yes, I might’ve raised my voice a bit but I was worried because (y/n) didn’t contact me nor my parents for the past week” Jaehyun defended himself but Haechan just glared at him

“Didn’t do anything, my ass” Haechan scoffed, shielding your sight from Jaehyun

“Haechan, what are you talking about? (y/n) didn’t contact any of us nor was assigned to work with any of us the past week” Johnny tried to reason

“Maybe not either of you” Haechan mumbled but was clearly heard by his hyungs

“Haechan…don’t start” you mumbled. “Is there something going on between the two of you? Like, is there something that happened that only the two of you know? (y/n), did someone threaten you? Was it something that Jaehyun did?” Doyoung asked, trying to make sure the situation doesn’t escalate

“Yea. Being angry at her when he’s the one at fault here” Jaemin growled, grabbing everyone’s attention

Not caring about the older members around, Jaemin went towards you who still not dare to actually face anyone. But Jaemin didn’t mind because he and the rest of the dreamies knew the actual truth. And that was that you were hurting yet Jaehyun doesn’t seem to have any feeling of guilt for what he did.

“What did say to you? Say the word (y/n), I’ll make him regret it” Jaemin uttered, cupping your cheeks gently; completely the opposite of his venomous words

You honestly didn’t want any of them to fight and want this moment to just pass by without any casualties that you just remain silent and only mumbled “I’m okay, Jaemin. Please drop it”. As angry as Jaemin was at his older member, he knew that comforting you and getting you out of here was his number one priority.

Just as Jaemin held your arm and was about to walk in the other direction, Jaehyun grabbed your other arm, making you stuck in between the 2 Jae who were having a stare-off with each other. Neither of them let your arm go nor avoid eye contact with each other.

“Let her go. She clearly doesn't want to be here” Jaemin warned, not wanting to stay another second longer

“You should be letting go. Holding onto her makes me think that something actually happen between the two of you and I’m guessing that you were the one that started it, Na Jaemin” Jaehyun taunted which angered Jaemin

“You know what? I feel sorry for you. Because to think that the Jung Jaehyun fans worshipped turned out so wrong because it was you who neglected her in the first place. I was the one that took care of her when you didn’t. You can call a backstabber for all I care because we both know who the real cheater is, am I right?” Jaemin taunted back, the conversation was heard by everyone in the hallway

Angry at Jaemin’s statement, Jaehyun didn’t hesitate to let your arm go but immediately launched himself towards Jaemin; both of them tumbling down on the ground, making you jump and back to the wall.

Seeing the younger men tumble and fought with each other, both Johnny and Doyoung tried to get the two to stop fighting whereas Haechan immediately shielded you from the gruesome scene unveiling before everyone.

“C’mon, let’s get you out of here” Haechan suggested, gently grabbing your wrist but feeling responsible for the situation, you yanked your arm from Haechan and rushed to get in between the two men who were now shoving each other towards the wall

Though you managed to get in between the two, neither man, especially Jaehyun actually stopped. Sure Jaehyun knew what Jaemin meant when he was called a cheater. But Jaehyun wanted to argue that he was being forced by the girl he kissed. But upon seeing you getting closer to Jaemin, not making any room for him to explain, angered Jaehyun. That thought alone was enough for Jaehyun to strike Jaemin. But instead, it was you that got hit and fell.

Seeing you stumble, Haechan was quick to rush to your side whereas Jaemin got angry and punched Jaehyun to the point he fell. Before Jaemin could launch another blow, Doyoung stopped him and told him to relax and that it wasn’t worth it.

“Don’t. Take care of her first. We’ll handle this. Especially since you’re the only ones that know what happened. We’ll ask from his point of view” Doyoung reminded, trying to stop Jaemin

“What’s the point of hearing his point of view, anyways? Did you not see that he has already hurt her emotionally and physically? He doesn’t deserve to be heard” Jaemin scoffed, backing away from Doyoung, staring into Jaehyun who was being helped by Johnny

“Jaemin! Enough!” Haechan exclaimed, making Jaemin look back and saw you being held by Haechan

“Know that I’m only leaving because I’m going take care of someone that you clearly neglected and hurt. Don’t think that I would let her go this time” Jaemin warned, turning away and helping Haechan get you back to Chenle’s place.

Arriving at Chenle’s house, Haechan allowed Jaemin to take care of you while he cooks dinner and lets the other dreamies know what happened.

“You shouldn’t have jumped in like that. I was already angry at how he treated you and how he didn’t admit that he was wrong. But seeing you get hurt because of him? At that moment, I didn’t care about either of our reputation or the fact that we were in the same group. I would give him a good beating for all I care” Jaemin admitted, slowly putting the ice pack onto your cheek

“You might not care but I do. Once images of his bruised cheek spread out, fans will start some sort of rumour. Or you never know what staff might be lurking around and spreading exaggerated rumours of you both” you replied, holding the ice

“Why do you still defend him?” Jaemin asked, pulling a chair and sitting across from you

“Why are you helping me?” you asked back, not answering Jaemin’s question, making him sigh

“Because, as cliche as it sounds, you’re a wonderful person. Your cute self, your selfless side. You’re smart even when you think you’re not. You’re caring and pay attention to the small details that not everyone might. Not to mention, you always put your effort into things even when it might seem like nothing. You deserve someone that would be that shoulder for you to lean on. Someone to be the ear for you whenever you want to ramble. Someone that is warm, safe and comforting to be your home. Someone who loves you for you and never ask you to change or do anything for them” Jaemin confessed, holding your hands in his

“Jaemin…” you whispered

“Let me finish, okay? I like you. I cared for you. It was just wrong timing. How you met him first. How he got close to you first. And how I didn’t even try to put up a fight. How I trusted him to take care of you when I should be that person. I should’ve been the one to get close to you first. I should’ve been the one to take care of you. I should’ve been the one to make you smile and be your first kiss. Call me selfish but I’m glad that his shitty behaviour was revealed because I can finally take care of you the way you deserve. Because you belong with me, not him. Even if you’re not ready to open up now. At least let me take care of you and treat you well” Jaemin softly confessed and kissed your knuckles

Somehow, despite what happened, despite how messed up your feelings and situation was, you still allowed your heart to open up to Jaemin. You allowed him to do as he promised. To take care of you, to shower you with the love and care that he promised. To reassure you every day that there is completely nothing wrong with you and how he has become your shoulder, your ear and slowly become your new home.

A/N: hi!! Your author here. Yes, I have not updated for nearly a month and I apologise because so much has been going on at work and I finally gave my one month notice and will officially resign next month.

Honestly, it wasn't really a big nor hard decision. Okay, maybe I was contemplating on it because I don't have a full backup plan on what I want to do. I really want to dive into becoming a full-time makeup artist but that really takes time and I was thinking of doing another full-time job for 1 more year (with better work-life balance and salary). I won't dive deep into why I'm leaving because out of respect towards the company (maybe next time, lmao). But I hope that I would be able to relax for once and not stress out about what might happen in the future.

Also, who tf manages NCT's schedule?! Like, yes I'm quite happy that I'll be getting smtown in my city but!!! An NCT DREAM fansign the day before and another afterwards?! When will MarkHyuck get some rest :') pray that I get the tickets to smtown because I have yet to see DREAM irl :') I miss them 5x?!?!?! I mean, if this means I'll end up with someone in dream, then by all means. lmao!!

Anyways, hope you enjoy this fic as I slowly go back to the shadows and try to come up with another fic. If you guys have any requests, do send me a request and I hope that you have a great day! Stay safe and always be happy :) xoxo vinet

[bee-the-loser-recs]

~~~~~☼ My Yuta One-shot Fic Recs ☼~~~~

𖤓 Call me by your name By @yutaholic 17k, tattoo artist Yuta, reader gets tattoos, nurse reader, both have bad past exes, fluff, smut, slight angst, (mis)communication, alcohol use

𖤓 Deep end By @yutaholic 22k, rich heir Yuta, bartender reader, mentions of arranged marriage, lack of freedom, smut, fluff, angst, kind of sugar daddy relationship, cigarette use

𖤓 On my own By @yutaholic 16k, non-idol au, cheating partners, getting revenge on ex partners, falling in love, smut, angst, fluff, revenge romance, reckless, raunchy, brief violence, cigarette use

𖤓 Convincing By @suhnshinehaos SMAU, university au, fake dating to real dating, shitty exes, basketball player Yuta, fluff, cute conversations, Yuta has a crush on reader

𖤓 Spiked By @suhnshinehaos 0.78k, drabble, office au, fluff, spiked punch bowl, reader looks after Yuta, drunk Yuta, mutual crushes, promises of kissing when sober

𖤓 In disguise By @tqmies 13k, Jungwoo x reader (x Doyoung x Yuta), college au, roommates, camboys, romantic Jungwoo & reader, foursome, smut, fluff, friends Mark & Haechan

𖤓 Fuck the police By @loudstan Magic au, werewolf Yuta, police officer reader, reader can read minds, smut, slight fluff, imprinting, slight angst

𖤓 Missing pieces By @woozten-x 18.8k, non-idol au, model Yuta, cafe worker reader, Shotaro is reader's brother, model Shotaro, living down the hall from another, homesickness, fluff, slight angst, comfort, teasing, jealousy

𖤓 Hard to fake [part 1], [part 2], & [part 3] By @irregular-idol-imagines 1.7k & 1.5k & 1.9k, non-specified au, Yuta is a friend's roommate, creepy dates, help getting rid of a creep, fluff, suggestive & sexual nature, awkwardness, dirty talk, making out, phone sex

𖤓 Kitchen flirt By @irregular-idol-imagines 600+, roommates to lovers?, humour, asking for outfit checks, making out, flirting, suggestive nature

𖤓 One of the Girls [part 1] & [part 2] By @irregular-idol-imagines 1.7k & 1.4k, friends to lovers?, fluff, insecure & toxic date, verbal conflicts, stereotypes, drinking together, discussions of relationships & dynamics, "girls night", suggestive nature

𖤓 Highway to heaven & Runaway with me By @justwritedreams 2.1k & 2.2k, college au, established feelings kind of, making out, suggestive nature, slight fluff, parties, friends NCT 127, beach holidays together with friends

𖤓 Rum, eggnog and an accidental confession By @neonun-au 4.2k, holiday au, fake dating to get family pressures of your back, Christmas time, accidental confessions, fluff, pining, past university partners

𖤓 Surprise By @jungcherie 10k, boss Yuta, secretary reader, parenthood au, abandoned child, mentions of them being Yuta's biological son, angst, slight fluff, friend Mark

𖤓 Love me now By @kpophours 7.3k, non-idol au, tattoo artist and piercer Yuta, old college friends, past crushes, fluff, suggestiveness, slight angst, idiots friends to lovers, mutual pining

𖤓 Fuchsia coloured sunglasses By @whereisten 28.5k, rockstar!Yuta, makeup artist reader, soulmate au, fluff, angst, some smut, different dimensions, comedy

𖤓 Delphinium By @taelme 12k, demi god au, Hades' son Yuta, Demeter's kid reader, angst, in depth discussions of grief, parental loss, hurt/comfort, some fluff, comfort from Yuta, slight strangers to lovers

𖤓 Tattoos and tea By @bellalikeskitties 1.9k, flower shop owner reader, tattoo artist Yuta, edgy x sunshine dynamic, cute, reader wants a tattoo, spending time together, fluff

𖤓 Just like me By @bellalikeskitties 1.6k, demon Yuta, immortal au, reader has a sick sister, making deals & selling your soul, God's blessing, mentions of Doyoung

𖤓 Cologne By @jaelvr 3.5k, college au, enemies to lovers, mutual feelings, Jonny is reader's brother, brother's best friend trope, fluff, angst, mutual feelings

𖤓 Just between us [part 1] & [part 2] By @mrkis 9.2k & 14.4k, established relationship between Yuta & reader, inviting Mark to join them, smut, mentions of Winwin being included in their dynamic, slight fluff, teasing, discussions of the rest of NCT having crushes on reader

𖤓 Train crush By @planetkiimchi 4k, strangers to lovers, meet cutes, non-specified au, red-haired Yuta, train crushes, asking one another out, fluff, cuties

𖤓 Sweet deception By @neowinestainedress 19.5k, Haechan|Yuta|Jaehyun|Jaemin|Johnny|Jeno x reader, halloween party, smut, monsterfucking, demon Haechan, fairy Jaemin, incusub Jeno, tentacle monster Yuta, ghost Jaehyun, shadow Johhny, smut, plot twist

𖤓 [1:24am] By @gyeomsweetgyeom Drabble, best friends to lovers, Yuta & reader have a habit of making out while drunk, frat NCT, other 127 members mentioned, pining, fluff, slight suggestiveness, mentions of weed

𖤓 Limo By @springseasonie 1.5k, Yuta x reader x Doyoung, established relationship, polyamorous, smut, driving in a limo, high fashion event, sexual content, semi public sex

[starillusion13]

CAN YOU ALL GUESS MY ENHA BIAS?😏😎

Guys I think I’m literally LEGALLY OFFICIALLY CHEATING ON NCT WITH ENHA🥲👹

These four have kidnapped me and that’s why I can’t update the ateez series😭 (blame it on them coz I’m writing down the Enha hyung line series😭) it’s not even in my list to post soon…this is so unfair to my other fics…THESE MFS are distracting me😒

How to pretend that I don’t know them? 😤

[fullsunstrawberry]

writing a fic request rn and idk if i should use a nct member as the cheating asshole boyfriend or if i should use another idol OR EVEN JUST MAKE SOMEONE UP UGHHH

[writemekpop]

Idol Spotlight | Huang Renjun

Ay-yo! Let us take you on a journey through our fave Renjun fics...

🌻 - Fluff  ☔️ - Angst  💋 - Smut

1. Craving You 💋

Summary: After a fiery argument, you and Renjun just want to sleep. Only, you’re pregnant, and craving something only Renjun can give you…

Genre: Established relationship, Pregnant!Y/n, Angst, Fluff

2. Birthday Sex 💋

Summary: Everyone knows that having sex is the best way to induce labour… Luckily you have Renjun to help you out.

Genre: Boyfriend!Renjun, pregnant!Y/n, domestic AU

3. Torn (Part 1) ☔️

Summary: When Renjun finds out you cheated, he kicks you out in the middle of the night…

Genre: MAJOR angst, suggestive

4. The L Word 🌻

Summary: You refuse to say I love you to your boyfriend Renjun, and he gets mad.

Genre: Boyfriend!Renjun, angst, domestic AU

+ NCT MAIN MASTERLIST+