#nap was weird because i kept waking up every 20-40 minutes

[extervus]

Scrambled home fresh duck eggs with onions, red peppers, yellow peppers and mushrooms. Like you even care

[wwhbtsjin]

Idol Lovers

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Majority Fluff, but also a bit of angst and smut in there. (Supportive Jungkook, Jealous Jungkook, Loving Jungkook, Seductive Jungkook, you name it!)

Word Count: 6.6k

(A/N): Again my love for Vixx comes out. This is an AU where Vixx has one female member and it's you, the maknae of the group. You had caught the eyes of many fans and idols alike, but one idol already had your heart, and you had his as well. But dating in secret was a bit of a challenge, especially when your Vixx Oppas didn’t know.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Being an idol was certainly not an easy life. But it was the life you chose, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. You weren’t in it for the fame, you were in it because of your love for the arts, the love for the music. This was the way you expressed it, and what better way to do it then next to some of your best friends now. You were the group Vixx’s maknae, and the only girl of the group. The bond you guys had was so strong that your performances were always really powerful. You treasured them and they treasured you, they were the brothers you wish you had.

Every time a male idol expressed that you piqued their interest, they intervened because of one, you didn’t feel the same way, or two, they didn’t think they were good enough for you. But they didn’t know that you already belonged to an idol, the one and only Jeon Jungkook of BTS. You two had met back in high school, but it was just recently he expressed his feelings for you. You accepted them, and your relationship has been strong ever since, but the only thing is, you kept it a secret from your Vixx Oppas while he kept it a secret from his BTS Hyungs.

~

“Yah! (Y/N)! Who said my little sister could look this good! Nobody can take their eyes off of you!” The familiar voice of N, the leader of the group shouted from the chair as he got his hair done. You had just emerged from your dressing room, you get one separate from the boys for obvious reasons, but you all get your makeup and hair done at the same place.

Today was the MBC Music Festival and you guys were going to be performing Shangri La, one of your hits from 2017. The theme for this year was old hits so you and the boys had decided on bringing back Shangri La. The boys were dressed in the black floral silk men's kimonos while you were dressed in a black and cherry blossom decorated kimono. All of the biggest stars of the year were present, including your boyfriend, Jeon Jungkook from BTS. They were just two doors down in their dressing room and you were able to hear them screaming and shouting at each other playfully.

“Oppa,” you chuckled and plopped into the open make up seat next to him to get your hair done and makeup ready, “You flatter me, but have you seen you guys? You six look like literal princes!” 

“I am prince Hyukie!” Hyuk was sitting behind you playing a game on his phone, “But our little sister looks like a Princess!”

Your stylist began working with your hair while you were on your phone, “Stopppppp,” you blushed and in the back of your mind you realized Jungkook was going to see you like this, “If I didn’t have my amazing stylist Unnie,” you looked up at her and gave her a cheeky smile, “I wouldn’t be getting this flattery!”

As soon as your stylist left you, the boys and you were just relaxing in the room. Ravi and Hongbin were knocked out, Hyuk was still playing a game on his phone, N looked like he was texting someone while Leo and Ken were watching videos. 

You were scrolling through instagram when you got a text message on your phone, the sender had the contact name “🐰”. It was your nickname for Jungkook on your phone. Since your relationship was practically a secret from everyone, you guys had to resort to that just in case if one of your members felt extra nosy. His nickname for you in his phone was, “🐷”. You hated it, but he loved it because you can eat just as much as he does.

2:30 P.M 🐰.- Jagggiii~

2:32 P.M. 🐷- Yes Oppa?

2:33 P.M. 🐰- I want to see you :( Are you ready? Can I see you for a little? I’m done and the Hyungs and I are just chilling now doing nothing.

2:34 P.M. 🐷- I gotta figure out how to escape for a little bit :( I’m currently sandwiched between N and Ken Oppa right now. We’re going out to our seats in about 20 minutes.

2:35 P.M. 🐰- Then spare me 10 please? I wanna see my beautiful girl ;-;

2:36 P.M. 🐷- Alright fine, I can never turn you down, where do I go?

2:37 P.M. 🐰- The staircase at the end of the hall. Nobody goes in there so meet me a floor above the entrance <3 Be there at 2:40!

You closed your phone and sighed, “I’m gonna go for a walk okay?” You looked up at N and Ken.

“Are you okay? Do you want us to go with you?” N looked concerned. It wasn’t surprising though because he always cared about the wellbeing of his members. That’s what made him such a mom sometimes.

“I’m okay. I just need to stretch my legs,” you stood up and smiled, “I might go peep and say hi to Ailee Unnie while I’m out. I won’t be long. 10ish minutes probably.” And before anyone else said anything, you began to sneak away. When you got into the hallway, you noticed the door to the staircase closing and Jungkook was right, nobody was on that end. You made a break for it and then successfully snuck into the staircase. You went up one flight of stairs just as Jungkook instructed and sure enough, he was standing right there with open arms.

“My god,” he took your hands into his and leaned in to give you a soft kiss, “You’re stunning. Absolutely gorgeous. You look like a goddess,” He kept on pecking your cheeks and your lips with soft kisses, “Man every male idol is going to have their eyes on you, I guarantee it. But little do they know, you’re my girlfriend and mine only.” Jungkook was dressed in a long bright orange jumpsuit with a white hoodie under. They were performing GoGo and this was the outfit that he used to wear with it.

“Hi my bunny,” you giggled and kissed his cheek, “I missed you. By the way, you are a literal hunk, you know that?” You wrapped your arms around his neck and looked into his eyes that seemed to always sparkle 24/7.

“I missed you too,” he soon had you in his warm embrace, “I can’t get over how absolutely stunning you look right now. Let’s take a picture!” He took out his phone and held it up. The two of you were close together in the frame. You held up a peace sign while Jungkook gave his iconic, award winning, smile.

“Send me that please Oppa~” you kissed his cheek as he wrapped his arm around your waist.

“Already on it,” he quickly opened up your message thread and sent it, “This 10 minutes went by way too fast, but we both have to get back now.”

You looked up at him, “Have a great performance okay my bunny? I’ll be cheering you on!” 

“And I will be cheering you on my princess,” he leaned in and gave you another soft peck on the lips, “Now you go first. I’ll see you later. I love you.”

Everytime he expressed his love for you, you squealed on the inside. It was still unbelievable that the Jeon Jungkook of BTS was in love with you and you loved him. “I love you too bunny,” you let go of him and began to walk towards the stairs, “I really do.” And with that, you began making your way back to the room with your members.

When you got back, Hongbin and Ravi were just barely waking up. N saw you come back and he smiled warmly at you, “Are you good now?”

You flashed him a thumbs up, “All good Hakyeon mommy!” You plopped down on the couch next to him and leaned your head on his shoulder, “How much time do we have before we have to go out?”

The 93 liners were fully awake by this time. Ravi stretched and then looked at you, “I hope soon, cause that was a really good nap and I didn’t want to wake up yet.”

“Yeah I could tell,” you chuckled, “You and Bin Oppa were drooling”.

“Yeah...it was a freaking pool.” Hyuk was in the same position you left him in, still playing games on his phone. All of you burst into laughter when there was a sudden visitor at your door. 

Your eyes widened because it was your boyfriend and his members.

“Oh Jin my friend!” Ken jumped up to embrace his friend in a hug.

“Brother!” Jin cheered in return.

The friendship that Jungkook’s hyung had with your Ken Oppa was really strong. Whenever those two were together...it was definitely a show. Especially because those two are on their own level in terms of...weirdness.

“Hi guys!” N waved from next to you, your head still on his shoulder. But then you saw Jungkook’s eyes behind Namjoon’s shoulders eyeing you with an eyebrow raised. You sat up straight taking your head off of N’s shoulders before smiling at him warmly. His eyes softened and you knew he wouldn’t be mad at you for that.

“(Y/N)-ah!” Hoseok smiled at you, “You look absolutely stunning! Like a Princess!”

Jungkook’s eyes widened and his mouth dropped open. This was the first time one of his members complimented you on your looks. You’ve had other idols do it in front of Jungkook before, but his members are a whole different story.

“T-thank you Hoseok-ah.” You smiled at him. You were more timid and shy than usual and Hyuk was able to notice.

He sat next to you and placed a hand on your knee, making Jungkook’s eyes widen, “Are you okay Princess?” That was Hyuk’s nickname for you. Out of the boys, he was the closest to you because of age.

Jungkook nudged J-Hope, “Yah, don’t make her uncomfortable.”

“Hey!” N’s eyes lit up, “Our schedule is actually free tonight after this, would you guys like to come over for some dinner if you guys are free?”

Namjoon nodded, “We surprisingly have a day off tomorrow and are free after this too...so sure! We’ll just go home and change and head over to you all! Would you like us to bring anything?” 

“Well…” N looked at you, “Our little sister has been craving chicken so we’ll take care of that. Would you guys like to take care of the drinks?”

“Alcohol!” Jimin cheered.

“Soda!” Namjoon hit him on the back of the head.

You giggled making everyone's heads turn towards you. Jungkook had the most loving look towards you.

“W-what?” you cocked your head to the side innocently.

“You literally have the cutest laugh.” Jin smiled at you.

“Doesn’t she?” Hyuk cheered and put an arm around your shoulder, “She’s too precious.”

You glanced over at Jungkook and he had an expression on your face that you’ve never seen on him before. He raised an eyebrow at you and also glared at his hyungs. Was he possibly getting jealous? 

“Well,” Jin smiled, “I’ll text Ken when we’re on the way later! Have a good performance!”

And soon enough you guys were left alone again. This would be the first time Jungkook would be coming over to your place. Granted you lived with the boys, but how were you two gonna do without exposing your relationship to everyone else.

“Well, let’s get out to our seats shall we?” N gestured for everyone to get up. You all walked together onto the stage and saw idols already sitting in their respective rows on the sides. You quickly scanned around for Jungkook and saw him looking at you. He smiled warmly and secretly gave you a little finger heart. You flashed one back to him before being led to your row. You and the boys were on the opposite end of them, both on the rows that are equivalent to stage level. 

You sat in between Ravi and Hyuk and yawned, “Is anyone else sleepy? Because I am.”

“I’m not cause I napped,” Ravi chuckled, “You decided to go out and see your secret boyfriend I bet.”

Your eyes widened, “W-what?” Did your members know about you and Jungkook?

“I’m kidding,” Ravi laughed, “I know you’d tell us even if you had your eye on someone anyways.”

You glanced across the stage and saw Jungkook being teased by his Hyungs. His iconic bunnylike smile blessed your vision and you smiled warmly at the sight. You sighed and then looked up at Hyuk, “I am so taking a nap before the BTS Oppas come by later.”

“I’m with you on that one.” 

Soon enough the show began, and you and the boys were backstage getting ready. It was a commercial and a break time, so the stage crew was hustling on the stage getting it ready for your performance. Your stylist was doing some last minute touch ups on your makeup. Scanning your surroundings, you saw Jungkook flash you a thumbs up. You gave him a finger heart back before Hyuk looked at you.

“Who was that for?” He raised an eyebrow at you.

“Nobody Oppa,” you smiled at him, panicking a bit on the inside, “Let’s do this.” 

The lights dimmed down and you got in your places for your performance. This was always your happy place. No matter how tiring it is, you loved it. You forgot about the world around you and got lost in performance. That’s what made you such a great artist.

By the time Shangri La was done everyone was up and out of their seats, giving you and the boys a standing ovation. Starlights were cheering, waving the lightsticks and chanting your names. The show had gone to commercial and you guys had the opportunity to say something to Starlights. 

“Our Starlight babies!” N cheered into the mic, “We hope we put on a great performance for you guys!” That caused the crowd to erupt into screams.

The mic was then handed over to Hyuk, “We worked hard to put this together, and we’re very glad to have all of your support.” He held up a finger heart.

Then you had the mic to close out Vixx’s time on the stage, “We thank Starlights for being so supportive of us. We’ll continue to work hard for you all. We love you Starlights!” That had caused the whole crowd to erupt into cheers. You and the boys waved goodbye and headed backstage. As you pass BTS’ seats, Jungkook gives you a finger heart and a kissy face. You blushed lightly and waved to him secretly before you guys got ready to go back and prepare for their whole group coming over for dinner.

~

You and the boys flooded back into your dorm and you made your way back to your room. Hyuk followed behind and tapped his shoulder, “(Y/N)-ah? Can I ask you something?”

Right as you opened the door, you peaked your head over your shoulder and saw Hyuk twiddling with his thumbs. You smiled softly at him, “What is it Hyuk Oppa? Can I take off my makeup first?”

“Ah yeah go ahead, I’ll come back when you’re ready.”

You nodded and then closed the door to our bedroom. You sighed as you plopped onto your bed, did Hyuk want to talk to you because he possibly saw you and Jungkook earlier? That couldn’t have been it...could it?

“Bangtan Boys are on their way! I ordered chicken!” You heard N yell from the hallway.

“Bunny is coming…” you muttered to yourself and then your eyes widened, “Oh my god bunny is coming.” You were panicking because 1, your boyfriend is coming over, 2, nobody knows he’s your boyfriend...at least to your knowledge and 3, you didn’t want to look embarrassing in front of him.

You began scrubbing off your makeup. As you were doing that your phone lit up indicating you got a text message from Jungkook.

8:01 P.M. 🐰-How in the world am I going to keep my hands off of you tonight?

8:03 P.M. 🐷-I have no idea. I’m freaking out knowing I might expose something? What happens if we’re found out?

8:04 P.M. 🐰-I mean eventually everyone will know...but if it were to be tonight we’ve just gotta be prepared. I’ll do my best though to make sure it won’t be hard if it comes to that point.

8:06 P.M. 🐷- Me too bunny :) How far are you guys?

8:08 P.M. 🐰-...coming up the elevator...see you in a minute my piggy.

8:09 P.M. 🐷- 😐

You quickly put your hair up into a bun, changed into a pair of leggings and one of Jungkook’s hoodies, which was fairly big on you. You stared at yourself in the mirror and your eyes widened, “I can’t wear this… his hyungs might recognize this hoodie.” But before you had a chance to change, the doorbell rang and you heard Ken running and screaming to get to the door. Him and Jin were definitely an interesting pair…

You were reaching into the closet when Ravi burst into your room, “Let’s go outside and see everyone!” He dragged you out and you saw your members all sitting around the living room with BTS. 

“There’s the Princess of the evening! The one that stole the show!” Jimin patted the empty spot in between him and Jungkook for you to sit with them. You glanced at Jungkook and he just raised his eyebrows at you.

“Jungkook-ah,” Jin looked over in your guys direction, “Don’t you have that same hoodie?” 

Well shit, that came faster than you thought…

“I do.” Was all that managed to come out of his mouth.

“This is my brothers,” you chimed in, “He left it last time he visited and I just keep forgetting to give it back to him.” Saved it...well at least you hoped.

“The chicken got delivered in the lobby!” N jumped up, “Hyukie, (Y/N), do you guys want to go get it?”

You nodded and walked to the door with Hyuk. You were glad to get away from that situation, even though you didn’t want to leave Jungkook’s side, things got awkward real quick.

When you and Hyuk got in the elevator a sigh escaped your lips.

“Can I ask you something that I’ve been meaning to ask you earlier?” Hyuk said out of the blue.

“Sure Hyukie Oppa,” you smiled at him, “What is it?”

“How do you feel about me?” He stared at you seriously, “I’ve grown to really like you more than my best friend (Y/N). I want to know how you feel about me.”

Your eyes widened, you thought Hyuk had suspected you and Jungkook...but this wasn’t what you were expecting. “H-hyukie Oppa…” you looked up at him, “I-,” you sighed, “I don’t have the same feeling back...I’m sorry. I’ve only ever seen you as my best friend. That’s it…”

“It’s because you’re already seeing someone isn’t it?” He looked away from you and then down at the floor.

“H-huh?” the elevator doors opened revealing the lobby. You and Hyuk made your way to the empty front desk.

He rang the bell then looked at you, “I know your dating Jungkook-ssi,” he got the chicken from the receptionist then looked back at you, “I got curious, and I know it was wrong of me, but I followed you early when you secretly met with him in the staircase. My feelings about you are true...but I just wanted to see if the reason you’d say no was because of Jungkook.”

“Hyuk Oppa…” you stared at him as he walked towards the elevators.

“Why didn’t you tell any of us you were dating him?” He pressed the button waiting for the elevator to arrive back at the lobby.

“I-...I just really really do love him.” but before you could answer completely the elevator doors opened.

“Let’s go back up before they all wonder where we are...your boyfriend is probably worried sick.” He walked into the elevator with you following.

“Oppa, I’m sorry...I truly am. But please, Bunny and I aren’t ready to tell anyone yet, so can you please keep this a secret?” You looked at him with pleading eyes.

“You guys have nicknames for each other already,” he chuckled to himself, “Guess he beat me to it when it comes to your heart…” 

“Oppa are you mad at me?”

“No… I’m just heartbroken… but I can’t do anything about it. I just hope he’s treating you like the Princess you really are.” The doors opened and soon you were back in front of your front door.

As you reached for the handle you could hear N and Namjoon talking.

“Hyuk-ssi and (Y/N)-ah seem like they would be a cute couple.” Namjoon’s voice boomed on the other side of the door.

“We’ve been wanting them to date for the longest time, but as much as Hyuk-ah likes her...I don’t think she likes him back.” N sighed and looked at the other leader.

“I feel like one of my members will snatch her up if he doesn’t soon. She’s a literal Princess.” He chuckled and both their voices soon disappeared from the door. Hyuk looked at you in a concern then opened the door.

You quietly helped him carry all the food onto the table laid out in your guys living room. But you just didn’t feel like eating anymore. You sat in between Jungkook and Jimin. Jungkook’s eyes quickly looked down at you, full of concern for his secret lover.

“Are you okay, jagi?” he asked you quietly without getting much notice from anyone. Except for Hyuk who was sitting across from you looking at you with concern also.

You nodded in disagreement. You felt tears starting to build up.

You stood up, “I-I’m not feeling well right now,” you smiled at everyone through your tear brimmed eyes, “Please have a good dinner, I need to close my eyes for a bit.” And before anyone could answer, you scurried away to your room. You closed the door behind you and plopped on your bed, tears streaming down your face.

You were bent out of shape because of many reasons. Both Namjoon and all of your members think you and Hyuk would be good together. Heck, Hyuk even has feelings for you. How would everyone feel when they found out you and Jungkook were dating? Would it cause tensions within your group? Would his hyungs get mad at him? You didn’t think it would get this conflicting.

When you scurried away to your room, all the boys looked confused, well except for Hyuk. Jungkook was full of worry and concern, it was heavily visible on his face. He wanted to run after you, see what was wrong, why you were bothered. And he wanted to hold you in his arms. But he knew he couldn’t do so just yet.

“Is she okay?” Yoongi asked out of concern.

“I may have upset her…” Hyuk sighed and leaned his head back, “Someone should go check on her.”

“Should I?” N stood up being the mom he is.

“I think Jungkook-ssi should. Those two are high school friends after all.” Hyuk looked at Jungkook and nodded approvingly. 

He got up and made his way to your bedroom. Jungkook knocked softly, “Jagi?” Luckily he was far enough that nobody could hear him call you that, “I’m coming in okay?” Jungkook opened the door and saw you curled up on your bed crying, back towards him.

You turned around hiding your face in your pillow, “Bunny…”

He smiled softly at the sight and sat on your bed with you. He helped you up and straight into his arms, “My piggy,” his voice was so comforting to hear, “What’s wrong?”

You wrapped your arms around him and buried your face into his chest, “We’ve been found out bunny…”

His hands soon found themselves playing with the bun on your head, “Found out? How so? Was it Sanghyuk Hyung? He said he upset you.”

You heard Ken and Jin playfully screaming animal noises in the background, “It was Hyukie Oppa...the way he just came out with it was so overwhelming...he told me he likes me, but he also saw us earlier in the staircase. What if our members aren’t happy when they find out? I don’t want to ruin any of the bonds we have with our own groups. What if they get mad at us and then fights erupt or there’s tension like in those Kdramas? I don’t want that to happen with any of us!” You looked up at him, tears were staining your cheeks.

Jungkook kissed your forehead, “Your heart belongs to me right? Were you honest with me, Sanghyuk Hyung and most importantly yourself?”

“I told Hyukie Oppa how much I really really love you. My heart does belong to you bunny oppa, I know how much I love you. It’s so much.” You cried holding him.

“You’re silly you know,” he placed his hand under your chin and looked up at you, “I love you so much too, and regardless of how our members react to the news, I still love you as much as I did 10 seconds ago.” He planted a soft kiss on your lips.

“Will this night end with all our members knowing that you and I are dating?”

“That might be the case, but I think it’s time that we tell them too. I’ll take care of it, but we won’t tell them right away, but they will know before we go home okay? I think hiding it has gone on long enough,” he looked down at you and poked your cheek, “I don’t like when my piggy is sad.”

“Why do you still call me piggy,” you pouted, “I’m not a piggy. I just have a good appetite.”

“If you can eat as much as me, then you’re a piggy. But you’re my piggy.” Jungkook started pecking kisses all around your face and even down to your neck.

You started giggling, “Oppa that tickles, but what if someone sees us?”

He started pecking kisses on your collarbone, “Even dressed like this you're irresistible. Babygirl you’re beautiful in anything you wear.” Your collarbone was a newly discovered weak spot as a small moan escaped your mouth. You quickly clamped your lips shut, “S-shh, you’re gonna make me make noises I’ve never done before!” You glared at Jungkook playfully.

Jungkook laughed and gave you a small love bite on your collarbone, “I’ll take note of that sweet spot for later!” He smiled at you warmly, “But there’s that smiling face I’m in love with. Come, let’s go back out because you need to eat your dinner.”

“Are we going back out as a couple? Or still hiding it?” 

“Sanghyuk Hyung is the only one who knows right?” he stood up and wrapped his arms around your waist.

You nodded, “Just Hyukie Oppa.”

“Then we’ll wait for the right time to tell them,” he kissed you, “but for now we just gotta make sure you eat your dinner. Okay?” 

You nodded and hugged him before walking to the door, “I love you Bunny.”

“I love you too my piggy.” He followed you out of the room and you guys both made your way back...to the chaotic mess in the living room. Ken and Jin were making weird animal noises while Namjoon and N were drinking together. Suga, Hongbin and Ravi were all in front of the Tv playing video games while Jimin, Taehyung, Hoseok, Leo and Hyuk were just sitting at the table talking.

“My princess!” N cheered, “Are you feeling better?”

“I am Hakyeon mommy!” You ran and sat next to him, “I’m hungry.”

Jungkook plopped down next to Hyuk and you raised an eyebrow at him. Then he immersed himself into conversation with that group.

“Namjoon-ssi was just telling me how good Jungkook is at comforting people, it seemed like it worked with you.” N looked down at you as you ate your chicken.

“Mhm,” you nodded as you held a drumstick in your hand, “Jungkook Oppa is really sweet, kind, caring, it’s always nice being with him.” You smiled at the thought of your boyfriend. He truly did care for you, and you couldn’t be more grateful for him.

“The way you talk about him (Y/N)-ah, sounds like you’re in love with him!” Namjoon teased you playfully, completely unaware that what he said was true.

Your eyes widened and you started blushing. You almost choked on the chicken you were eating, “I-...Namjoon Oppa, you almost made me choke on my chicken.” N handed you a glass of water laughing.

“You take good care of your members Sunbae,” Namjoon chimed in, “My members say I’m destructive.”

“Well this is my princess,” he wrapped his arms around you, “and Hyukie is our baby, I have to take care of my children.” The conversation with N and Namjoon really began to lighten your mood.

Meanwhile Jungkook sat with Jimin, Taehyung and Hyuk, their conversation was on a much more different level. 

“Taehyung-ah would not get off of his games all night,” Jimin whined, “Sanghyuk Hyung, do you ever have that issue with your members? Is (Y/N) a gamer?”

“You know...I don’t know what she does behind those closed doors of her bedroom,” Hyuk chuckled, “She loves sleep so I don’t think so.”

“(Y/N) isn’t a gamer,” Jungkook chuckled, “She sucks at games. She always dies.”

“I didn’t know you and (Y/N)-ah were so close.” Taehyung raised an eyebrow at him.

“They are high school friends after all,” Hyuk chuckled, “Jungkook-ssi, would you like to see my Overwatch themed set up?” Hyuk clearly didn’t have a set up like that, he was just trying to get Jungkook away because he wanted to ask him some questions.

“Oh boy do I?!” Jungkook jumped up and followed Hyuk, sounding like a little kid. You smiled at the scene of Jungkook, it made your heart flutter.

Jungkook and Hyuk went into Hyuk’s room and Hyuk closed the door, “I don’t really have an overwatch set up, I just wanted a chance to ask you some questions about (Y/N)-ah.”

“Oh,” Jungkook leaned against the door, “I will answer everything honestly. You guys are her big brothers and I want you guys to trust me with her.”

“She told you about my feelings for her?” Hyuk sat down on his bed and looked at Jungkook seriously, “How does that make you feel?”

Jungkook sighed, “I respect you Sunbae, I really do. And I can’t stop you from having feelings for her, that’s all on your own,” he peeked his head around the room and saw a polaroid of you and Hyuk on Hyuk’s nightstand, “And I trust (Y/N)-ah that her feelings are strong for me. I trust both of you to respect all of our feelings towards everything...if that makes sense?”

“I get what you’re saying,” Hyuk noticed you looking at the photo, “That was our Christmas movie marathon last year. I realized then that I liked her more than just my best friend.” 

“You liked her before I did,” Jungkook looked down, “Sunbae I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

“It’s okay Jungkook-ah, it really is, what matters to me is her happiness, doesn’t that matter to you too?”

“Of course it does,” Jungkook smiled at the thought of you smiling, “Her smile literally lightens up everything.”

“And you’ll take care of her? Love her? Care for her? Protect her?” Hyuk looked up at Jungkook, “I could only do so much, but you’re her boyfriend so you have more of an impact than I do now.” 

“Sunbae, I have no intention of stealing her away from you. You’re her best friend and that’s a spot that’s made just for you only,” Jungkook was wise knowing his place, “You guys have been through much more than her and I have been through so far. You’re her best friend and I’m her boyfriend, but regardless we’ll both be loving, caring and protecting her no matter what. And I hope to be doing that for the rest of my life.”

“You two are some of the biggest stars right now, are you prepared to deal with paparazzi? Word will get out that you two are dating eventually or our labels will say go public with it,” Hyuk sighed, “She gets overwhelmed easily, so can you be there to make it easier for her?” 

“Of course Sunbae, I don’t want anything to be hard for her, so I will do my best in everything.” 

“I think it’s best that you guys let everyone know before the end of the night that you guys are dating,” Hyuk walked up to Jungkook and put his hand on his shoulder, “But just take care of her okay? I care so much about her and don’t want to see her get hurt. Especially by you.”

“I promise Sunbae.”

“Call me hyung.” And with that, Hyuk left the room.

Jungkook followed and saw you laughing, he smiled at the sight of you with N. He felt relieved knowing you were surrounded by people who genuinely cared for you and protected you when he wouldn’t be able to.

“Hyuk-ah!” Ravi called out, “We were just wondering, what were you showing Jungkook-ssi, you don’t have an Overwatch set up? Did you confess your love for the golden maknae or something?”

“I-...nevermind.” Hyuk pouted.

Jungkook noticed there was an empty spot next to you so he decided to sit next to you. He smiled at you warmly and couldn’t take his eyes off of you.

“Yah! Yah!” Yoongi shouted, “Look at the way Jungkookie is staring at (Y/N)-ah!”

“Look at how (Y/N)-ah is blushing!” Ken pointed out too.

Your eyes widened hearing both of your members point out all of that. Jungkook scratched the back of his head and chuckled embarrassingly. This was all coming at you too fast again you started panicking. But you relaxed because Jungkook placed his hand on top of yours and held it tightly to reassure you that he’s there.

“Is there something you want to tell us Princess?” You heard N’s voice in the background, you couldn't hide things from your Hakyeon mommy, it wasn’t right.

“Yeah Jungkook-ah! Something you want to tell us?” Hoseok wiggled his eyebrows at the two of you.

Jungkook sighed, “(Y/N)-ah and I have been dating...for the last 6 months.” He held the two of your hands that were intertwined up together.

“Why didn’t you tell us Princess?” Rather than N sounding mad, he was more curious. You expected mad or sad, not curious.

“I…” you sighed, “I was just scared that you guys wouldn’t have approved. Every male that has come my way expressing their feelings for me, you guys always stood up for me because I didn’t feel the same way. But bunny oppa was different. I actually had feelings for bunny oppa but I just didn’t want you guys to disapprove of him.”

“How you didn’t tell us Jungkook-ah?” Namjoon asked his maknae.

“I would tell you when (Y/N)-ah was ready to tell her members. I trust you hyungs 100% but I just didn’t want to risk anything getting exposed without her knowing. I didn’t want her to get overwhelmed.” Jungkook gripped your hand tightly under the table.

“We’re sorry we kept this hidden from you guys,” you bowed your head down, “We really are.” You expected members to start getting mad, but instead you got complete silence.

“Well Jungkookie beat me to it,” you heard Taehyung break the silence, “I was gonna try to go for you (Y/N)-ah.”

“Wait,” Jimin’s head popped up, “S-so was I! She’s a literal princess!”

“She’s so adorable! I was going to try!” Jin shot up too causing Ken to shoot up.

“Yah you idiot!” Ken playfully smacked him, “That’s my little sister!” 

“Not biologically…”Jin chuckled.

“None of you guys are mad?” You looked up shocked.

“I mean, we wish you guys told us, but there’s nothing we can do from stopping it.” N chuckled.

“I kind of sensed that JK had a girl.” Yoongi laughed.

“B-but, Hakyeon mommy I heard you talking with Namjoon Oppa about how you wanted me to be with Hyukie Oppa!” You looked at the two of them then at Hyuk, “You’re okay right Hyukie Oppa?”

“I am,” he smiled at you warmly, “I talked to Jungkook, and as long as he takes good care of you and makes you happy and treats you like the Princess you are, that’s all that matters for me.”

“Not a princess hyung,” Jungkook smiled at you, “I’ll treat her like the queen she is.”

“Jungkook-ah,” N’s voice turned serious, “When the public knows of you two dating, it will get harder, but will you protect her to the best you can? We all want nothing but happiness for you two, and especially our Princess.”

“I will do my best Sunbae. I promise. I love (Y/N)-ah way too much that I would hate to see anything hurt her.” Jungkook was rubbing your knuckles with his thumb, your hands have still not separated from each other.

“Then that’s what we want to hear,” Leo chimed in, he may be stoic but he cares for you greatly, “If you hurt her we will find you.”

“We will find you too!” Jimn chimed in glaring at Jungkook, “And we’ll swoop in!”

Jungkook wrapped his arms around you tightly, “I don’t know if this is a test...but she’s my girl! I will protect her as best as I can!”

You bursted out laughing, “Bunny you’re suffocating me.”

“Oh one rule though,” Namjoon and N both chimed in, “No making out in front of any of us members!”

Your face heated up while Jungkook laughed, “Then don’t come in my room whenever sh-” You smacked Jungkook to make him shut up.

“We’ll follow the rules!” You giggled. That wasn’t nearly as bad as you had anticipated it to be, but you were sure glad your members approved of you and Jungkook. Now you guys wouldn’t have to go around hiding anymore.

“I love you piggy.” Jungkook whispered in your ear as members of both groups were fooling around again. 

You looked at him and smiled, “I love you too bunny.”

[fanofafan2ff]

52: Arrived

Madison

I adjusted the blinds in the room so the sun wouldn’t come in as much. It didn’t matter though. Chloe was only going to sleep for an hour before she woke up because she either realized no one was holding her or she was hungry.

Is it possible that a baby could already be spoiled at six weeks? Because Chloe  Monét Brown was just that.

After Mijo and Mel’s wedding, it was like my pregnancy was moving in slow motion. The weeks were going by so slowly, I felt like I’d never hit 40 weeks. But when I did and sis still wasn’t here... I was completely over it! I was beyond uncomfortable, tired, sick, fed, and up- in that order.

Our doctor had given us a two week timeline and if she wasn’t out by then, I’d have to be induced. But, Little Miss Brown wasn’t having that. A day shy of being seven days overdue, my water broke in the middle of the night. I was surprisingly calm.. but all that flew out the window once my first contraction hit.

Thankfully, Chloe didn’t torture me for hours labor wise. I was already dialed to 4 by time we got to the hospital. It didn’t take me long to get to 10 before I was pushing. She was 5 pounds and 2 ounces, which surprised me because I thought she’d be a little bigger than that.

And as young as she was, she already had a personality of her own. She loved to be held and cuddled by everyone, especially Christian. He loved his sister and nobody could tell him anything about his Coco. That’s what he called her and he made sure nobody thought they could call her that too. He was already so over protective of her.

It was definitely and adjustment, having both him and Chloe. Having two kids was no joke. It was extremely difficult about three weeks ago when we got to take her home. He was having kind of a hard time realizing he wasn’t the only child anymore. He had a whole tantrum and even told Chris and I that we liked the baby more than him.

My poor pumpkin felt like we didn’t love him all because he wasn’t the center of attention anymore. In a way it was cute but also concerning. Dr. Lopez had informed me about stuff like this happening but to actually see it was crazy. So one night, after dinner, we made sure to sit down with him and just talk things through.

We let him know that even though Chloe was getting a lot of attention it didn’t mean we loved him any less. And once we incorporated him into her routines, he couldn’t get enough of her. He loved taking naps with her and whenever he’d wake up before her and she started fussing in her sleep, he’d rub her back just the way Chris and I taught him how to so she would doze right back off to sleep. He especially loved to give her his special big brother good night kisses.

Sometimes I swore this wasn’t my life.

It was around 10am, so Christian was in school today and wouldn’t be home until around 4:30. The house was clean and quiet and I was in heaven.. at lest for another hour. I made sure to readjust the baby monitor so I could see her clearly on my phone and pulled up the door before exiting and making my way to the bedroom.

Since giving birth six weeks ago, I’d already dropped 20 pounds which I was grateful for, since I’d gained damn near 50. I’d been eating better, trying to exercise, and breast feeding helped a lot too. All the extra weight on me just didn’t make me feel like myself and I hated it. This shit had to go.

I sheded my pajamas and pulled on some compression shorts and a T shirt. I slipped on the first pair of Nikes I saw and sauntered downstairs to the gym.I kept the baby monitor app up and watched Chloe’s chest fall and rise and she napped in the dimly lit room. I popped one of my Airpods in and started some music up while I started the treadmill up.

MoneyBagg Yo’s voice flowed through my ears as my fast walking turned into strides. Not before long I was in a groove and jogging at a nice pace. I wasn’t anywhere near where I wanted to be weight loss wise. I intended on losing the 50 pounds I’d gain during this pregnancy and well as an additional 20. All together, I needed 70 pounds gone.

Of course everyone around me though my weight loss goal was crazy, seeing as though I was only six weeks postpartum, but I needed this time in the gym for myself. I hadn’t been working as much while I was pregnant with there being so much going on so there was that. After giving birth, I was stuck in this routine of being a stay at home mom and I never saw this for myself so it was weird.

But breast feeding full time came with a lot, so I told myself I’d give it 6 months and then slowly ween Chloe off my boob. After that, I’d go back to working and getting my business back on track. My pockets weren’t hurting for cash at all, thank God. But, I never saw myself living doing the stay home mom thing for real.

And you know who was supportive the who every step on the way when I told them my plan.

Christopher Maurice Brown.

I’d told him my weight goal and before I could even get the reasons why out of my mouth he was already asking if I needed him to get me a trainer. He even vowed to get healthier with me. He wanted to know what he could do to help me out of the funk of the stay at home mom routine. He wanted to help me revive my business. He just.. was everything. I really loved that man to the moon and back.

It was having his support that made literally everything so easy.

Especially with the kids. Chris made sure to make his family a priority- even while having a million and one things to tackle. He was front row center for everything that had to do with Christian and Chloe. He was getting Christian to school and packing lunches, he was changing diapers and rocking her back to sleep when I was too tired to move.

I just really had to thank God for blessing me with this man, even with everything we had been through.

An hour later I had ran about 3 miles, did ab workouts and also worked on my glutes. I was feeling good. I made my way back upstairs and checked on Chloe. I was surprised she hadn’t woken up yet. I used to time to indulge in a super long shower. I even got to wash my hair. She’d not only help my gain a little more junk in the trunk but my hair had grown an extra five inches. I was so thankful. My hair needed a break from wigs and extensions.

After I got dressed and ran some product through my hair, I climbed back in the bed and got comfortable. As the weeks went by she was sleeping a bit more soundly and I was so thankful. I finally had a moment to myself and decided to indulge in social media.

I honestly hadn’t been on there in a while. Between being so busy and actually not caring about what people posted for real these days, I only found myself on here when I had a few minutes of down time.

Cute outfit.

New boutique.

Cute hair style.

“Oh, her nails are bomb.” I said out loud to myself. I continued to scroll through my feed making sure to like a few things. I could feel my eyes slowly getting heavier as I scrolled through my feed. I double checked that Chloe was okay and decided to take a nap. I made sure to set an alarm for 1pm, ensuring that I’d sleep for at least 45 minutes.

I wasn’t sure how long I’d been asleep when I felt wet lips on my face. “She sleep man.” Chris laughed. “But I missed her today.” Christian whispered. I guess he wasn’t trying to wake me up. He was the cutest, I swear.

“Hi pumpkin.” I giggled. He crawled back over and suffocated me with a mini bear hug. “I made Coco a picture today at school.” He boasted. “Oh, you did?” “Yeah, and daddy said I could show it to my grandmas cause they’re gonna come today.” He rambled. Today?

I look at over Chris who was shaking his head at Christian. “Yooo.. you can’t hold water.” He laughed. “Surprise.” Chris shrugged. “Aw, they’re coming?” I smiled tiredly. “Yeah they should be here tonight. I knew y’all was missing each other and they wanted to come see Christian and Chloe. So, I got em some flights and they’ll be staying here for a week or two. And you need the help when I leave.” He said.

He would be leaving for a promo run for his album next week. He’d only be gone for a week and a half, but that seemed like forever these days. We’d spent so much time together lately I honestly forgot what it was like to miss him. And I really didn’t want to remember.

“You’re the sweetest.” I said honestly. “Gimme kiss.” I puckered my lips for him. He leaned over and pecked me quickly. “Ew.” Christian gagged. He got himself off the bed and ran to his room which made Chris and I laugh. I swear he was so dramatic.

I grabbed my phone and checked the time to see I’d only been sleep for 30 minutes. I checked the baby monitor app and saw Chloe was still sleeping. “Why did you pick him up so early?” I asked. He still had a cool 3 hours left. “I missed my son.” He shrugged. He eased on the bed and laid himself right on top of me making me laugh.

“Whyyyyy?” I whined. “Cause I missed my wife too.” “Fiancé .” I corrected. He kissed his teeth. “Fiancé.” He mocked in a voice that was supposed to sound like mine that made me laugh. I placed both my hands on his face and gave him another kiss. “Did you check on Chloe when you got in?” I asked. “Yeah, was still knocked out. That titty milk be having my babygirl gone.” He laughed before rolling off of me.

He placed his arms behind his head and got comfortable. He done a white T shirt, grey Nike shorts, and some socks. His was growing out his facial hair and slowly but surely, his beard was connecting. The scruffy look worked for him. But then again, what doesn’t? He looked so comfortable.. yet so fine.

“Madison.” I heard before snapping back into reality. “Huh?” “Where yo ring at?” He asked. I looked down at my left hand immediately. Shit, where did I put it this time? “I think I took it off in the bathroom last night.” “You think?” He chuckled darkly. “Aight.” He nodded before rolling out the bed and heading to the closet.

My ring was just a little too big for my finger, so it was always sliding off my finger whenever I wore it. Chris and I meant to get it resized but, it’s just been too many things going on. I kept telling myself I needed to do it as soon as possible because I was truly sick of us having this petty argument.

I got up and made my way to the bathroom. I opened the small jewelry box on my vanity and pulled my ring out before slipping it on my finger. I sauntered into the closet and watched as he pulled one of his million duffle bags from the shelf. He had been putting off packing for his trip for days but he was just ready to do it now.. all of a sudden. He was so aggravating I swear.

But, honestly, I was in no mood to argue today. I walked up behind him as he sorted through his Nike collection, trying to pick out some shoes. I pouted as I wrapped my arms around him. “Don’t be mad at me.” I whined. “I’m sorry. See, I put it back on.” I extended my hand so he could see.

“Cool.” He uttered, not even bothering to take a look at the ring. I walked around and stood in front of him. I put his face in my hands for the second time today. “Christopher. Stop being petty.” I rubbed over his ears to relax him a bit. “I keep telling you, it’s too big. I don’t want it to fall off and I don’t want to lose it so I take it off. You think I’m trying to look single out here or something?” I asked.

"I have two kids, nobody’s gonna want me.” I shrugged. The joke made him kiss his teeth. “Stop being mad at meeee.” I continued to whine. “I’m not mad.” He ensured. I let his face go and he continued to sort through his shoes. “I just want you to wear it, alright? I love seeing you have it on your finger.” He explained. “We getting it resized before I leave. Cool?” He asked. I nodded and puckered my lips for a kiss.

He bent down and got dangerously close to my lips before pulling back, “Ha, you thought!” I hated when he did that shit. “You’re not gonna kiss me?” I pouted. “I’m good love.” The side eye I was giving him was vicious. He thought that shit was so funny. I nodded and backed away from him. 

“Keep that same energy, Brown. Keep that same energy. Cause when I get clearance from my doctor next week, you’re gonna be sick. You’re going to live in the doghouse. Better get real acquainted with that left hand, play boy.” I stuck my middle finger at him and made myself comfortable on top of the island which was a few steps away from him. 

He looked back at me with a playful smile. 

“Cap.” He muttered. I lifted my eyebrow, daring him to continue. “I know your body like the back of my hand. You just went six weeks without this dick. And if you put me in the doghouse.. you gon be sick.” He chuckled. “Why does this sound like a bet?” I grinned.

“What you tryna put on it, baby mama?” He asked as he walked over. He knew what he was doing. His hands immediately came in contact with my thighs. He ran small circles over them while staring in my eyes. Ugh, I couldn’t stand him. 

“Let’s put a week of dirty diapers on it.” I said pushing his hands of me. He found it funny but nodded anyway. “Seal it with a kiss?” He asked puckering his lips up. I learned forward and just before we could kiss, I backed up and placed my hand in his face. “You thought!” 

---

“What she said sis? That pussy is clear for take off!” Kaya clapped. “Pchttt!” Ashley cosigned making the worst airplane sound I’d ever heard in my life. I laughed obnoxiously loud as we sat in the back of the Mexican restaurant. 

I had just left my 6 week check up and I was all good to have sex again. My health was in good shape as well, and I’d lost an additional five pounds. I was feeling good. I had been locked in the house for weeks and I needed to get away and just breathe. So, Mel decided we could all have lunch together. 

Both my babies were at home with both their grandmas. The love and support I’d been smothered this week was so needed. Chris left a few days ago and I was really missing him. Christian would get so sad when he wasn’t here to bring him to school everyday, but Chris promised they’d pick right back up where they left off. 

Both Mama J and Tasha were loving being here with them, but honestly, I think I loved it more. They wouldn’t let me do anything but breastfeed her Chloe. After I’d feed her they’d whisk her away from grandma time which gave me time to catch up on some sleep. My skin and body were so thankful for it. My dad was a bit too busy to take off work but he’d let me know he’d be out to visit soon. I felt like it had been so long since I seen him. 

“It’s just a shame that yo husband ain’t here to be the pilot.” Mel nudged me. I hadn’t told them about the bet and I wasn’t going to. They would root for Chris anyway. I only giggled i response to her words. “I do miss him.” I admitted. It had only been a week and I was ready for it to be over.

“So when are you gonna start planning the wedding?” Mel asked. I shrugged. “Any theme in mind?” Another shrug. “Who’s the maid of honor?” Kaya asked. Another shrug. I literally had no idea. And honestly, the wedding wasn’t on my priority list right now. 

Our waiter came over to the table and somehow Kaya convinced me to get a margarita. I was only having one to celebrate my health and I knew I had to pump and dump my breast milk for the next few hours. I was so glad I’d decided to pump before I decent amount before I had left this morning. 

After a few sips, I was already tipsy. I had never been a light weight, but being away from alcohol for so long had me feeling like I was a college freshman again. It wasn’t before long that I was officially drunk. Shit, it was barely 1pm and I was gone. 

The girls immersed themselves in girl talk as I quickly sent a message on my phone. 

I miss you. 

And your dick 😢

I was trying my hardest to not lose this bet Chris and I had going... but fuck. 

We had sex up until I was about 8 months but after that I literally just couldn’t bother. I was so uncomfortable those last couple weeks I didn’t want to be touched. But, in this moment Chris was making me eat my words. 

I was sick.

I stared into space quietly and I could see myself laid out in the middle of our king sized bed with my legs spread open while Chris sucked on me like his life depended on it. I blinked, and I could see him pushing my thighs back into the mattress and he pounded into me and whispered how good I felt in my ear. I had to take a breath because it’s was as if I could feel every bit of it. 

“Hello?” Ashley snapped. “Did you hear me?” She asked. “Sorry, what?” “I said, I’m single. I’ve decided to devote this year to myself and career.” She shrugged. “So, no more fucking Austin?” I asked. “Nope.” She made sure to pop the third letter. 

“Well, I’m gonna try not to.” She laughed. “Fuck, I just be having them stupid ass moments of weakness when I’m drunk. And Austin never tells me no. That’s he problem!” She reasoned. “Why toxic dick be so goooood?” She whined. “Preach, sister.” Kaya clapped. 

“I’m just gonna keep the focus on myself. Stay celibate- to the best of my ability. Build my brand and kill shit. Period.” She signaled with her hand. “Well, you got our support babes. Always, you know that.” Mel chimed in. “Plus, you know we gon call you the fuck out if you start fucking him again and don’t tell us. Yeah, bitch I’m still salty.” Kaya rolled her eyes. 

Once all the hoopla around Mel’s wedding went away, Ashley spilled her guts on her and Austin messing around again. Turns out they had been having sex wayyyy longer than anyone knew about. She thought he was trying to rekindle the relationship, but turns out he just really wanted to keep having sex. He was stringing her along and once she picked up on it she was out. She would slip up a few times though. 

Ashley rolled her eyes right back. “Well, like I said, toxic dick be good.” She said making us laugh. “I think I wanna move to Atlanta with Ant.” Kaya blurted out. My eyes bulged. That was a big ass step. Especially since Kaya was so strategic with her love life now. Ty really fucked her head up. It took a while for Ant to get through to her, so to hear that she was thinking about moving to another city for him was big.

“Yeah, I know.” She let out a nervous laugh before shrugging. “Wow, that’s big Kaya.” Mel weighed in. “Crazy thing about it is... I’m not even afraid to do. I think... I’m gonna do it.” She sighed. “Am I crazy?” She asked. 

“No!” We agreed in unison. “You love him, and if you think y’all are ready for that step, we’re behind you 100 percent of the way.” I stated. I’m sure Ashley and Mel felt the same way and my sentiments were correct when they chimed in with the nods and words of approval. She looked like she let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. 

“Wait.. that means we’re not gonna be a foursome anymore.” Ashely stated. “Bitch, we gon always be a foursome! The fuck. I wish y’all would have a bitch try to take my spot.” Kaya ranted. I swear we could never have a moment. 

We continued girl talk and I had decided to have one more margarita and take another shot or two. I was officially down for the count. Mel wasn’t drinking really and opted to drive me home. On the way home, I couldn’t shake the feeling between my legs. I really missed my man. 

He still hadn’t texted me back so I decided to call him. No answer. I sighed and slipped my phone back into my Birkin. I was over it. We pulled up to the house maybe about five minutes later and I let Mel know she didn’t have to come inside. I walked up the driveway and slipped inside the house quickly. 

I immediately noticed how quiet it was so that could only mean no one was home or they were all asleep. I waltzed in the kitchen fumbling with my bag as I tried to pull my phone out. My eye cause the pink reminder slip hitched under the magnet in the kitchen. 

Took the kids to the zoo. We should be home around 4. Love you!

- Mama and Tasha 

They were so cute. I found it funny that they never opted to just text me, they always left notes. I sighed at the quietness throughout the house and grabbed a bottle of water out the fridge. I downed the water quickly before shuffling up the steps and into the bed.

I needed nap.

I stripped myself of my jeans and bra and snuggled into the bed with just my shirt and panties on. The buzz I had was going to make for a excellent nap. I yawned and hummed for a few minutes before I felt myself drifting off. 

I stirred when I felt cold hands on my skin. They ran from the top of my thighs down to my knees and then back to my thighs again. A pair of lips connected to my neck next and I thought I was dreaming when I saw Chris staring back at me. 

“So what you missed more? Me or this dick?” He asked before planting his lips on mine. “Definitely the dick.” I giggled. I wasn’t even about to ask how he was here right now. All that mattered is that he was. I pulled him down for another kiss. “I missed you... so much.” I mumbled in between kisses. 

“I.. missed you...more.” He replied. His tongue instinctively found its way into my mouth and I let him take control. He used his knees to spread my thighs so he could lay in between them. He pressed himself against me and I could just feel how hard he was. I was still a little buzzed which made all of this feel even better.

He helped me out my clothes quickly before pulling off the shirt and Nike shorts he was wearing. With barely any foreplay, I was soaked and ready. He began running the head over my clit which sent shivers through me. He literally watched as I got wetter for him. I was sick of him playing with me. 

As if he knew how antsy I was getting he stopped the teasing and began pushing my thighs back so they were touching the mattress. It always amazed me how flexible I could be once it involved taking dick. He used one of his hands to guide himself to my entrance. He began teasing me again, and just before I could protest, he slowly slid inside me. 

I gasped and instinctively sent my hand to his lower torso. He pulled out some before sending a few more inches inside of me as I cried out. “Shitttt.” I sighed. He moved slowly as my body got reacquainted to his size. Once he sensed that I fully adjusted he picked up his speed. 

I could hear how wet I was over our skin slapping together. The beautiful harmonies our bodies created made me even wetter. His hand found its way around my neck and my eyes rolled at the pleasure the lack of oxygen sent me. I shut my eyes for a second before I moaned and forced them open to look him in the eyes. 

He was concentrated on watching collide. “Fuck.” I heard him groan before looking away and finally into my eyes. “You lost.” He grinned.

[strangest-sensei]

2, 4, 6, 8, etc for ur ask thing >:)

TABBY THAT IS 50 QUESTIONS.

 2.  do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day?

For like 2 seconds and then I can feel the skin on my face drying and flaking. ;-;

4. how do you take your coffee/tea?

I don’t. Like I will drink both if they are sweet and creamy, but it will be a struggle.

6. do you keep plants?

I thought this said pants? I keep plants until I kill them. I am the worst.

8. what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings?

I would like to say drawing, crocheting, and sculpting, but not really. Usuay i bottle it up and get it out during drunk yelling.

10.do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach?

All of the above. I spin in my sleep.

12. what's your favorite planet?

Venus, because of libra stuff.

14. if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like?

Uh, that would probably be @mucheak, and I would want my witchy, vintage, cute stuff to mesh in the middle with some of her spacey, nerdy, comfy vibe~

16.what's your favorite pasta dish?

Spaghetti. My own. I am super fucking picky. I hate sweet sauce ;-;

18. tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.

Um, Me and Tabby remember most stupid things I did. Right now since it’s late I’m thinking of “slurp”.

20. what's your favorite eye color?

Green yo.

22. are you a morning person?

If it’s 3 in the morning and i napped earlier.

24. is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets?

Naaaah. I like being secretive about some shit, but most shit I trust to Tabby and James yo.

26. what are the shoes you've had for forever and wear with every single outfit?

My furry boots. I got some regular boots second hand as a gift and I sewed fur on, because I’m cheap.

28. sunrise or sunset?

Both. Staying up till sunrise is fantastic and sunset is pretty and signals night time.

30. think of it: have you ever been  truly scared?

Once?  kind of.

32. tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

After finishing Tony Hawk and Tabby watched the sunrise.

34. tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it?

It’s a dog that I named Cody and guess who gave me that shit yo. IT WAS TABBY. Everyone is about you bro.

36. which band's sound would fit your mood right now?

Probably something emo in lyrics and peppy in tempo.

38. tell us about your pet peeves!

I hate not being taken seriously.

40. think of a piece of jewelry you own: what's it's story? does it have any meaning to you?

I have a clear quartz necklace that I bought at the paranormal convention that I went to with tabby~

42. do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it!

No. I hate coffee, people, and places that aren’t a comfy house.

44. when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything?

...Never?

46. tell us the worst pun you can think of.

I can’t think of any? I’m to cold and tired.

48. what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today?

The dark. Not the same anymore yo~

50. what's an odd thing you collect?

Nothing odd really. Normal shit like rocks and rings.

52. what are your favorite memes of the year so far?

I don’t have any yet homie~

54. who's the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face?

Myself I think. Mirrors.

56. what are some things you find endearing in people?

If they love other peoples genuine interest in stuff. Serious love is the best yo. I support the people I love.

58. who's the wine mom and who's the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why?

Trista is wine mom and Tabby is vodka aunt~

60. do you like poetry? what are some of your faves?

Naaaaaah. I used to read some edgy ones as a teen though. lol

62. do you drink juice in the morning? which kind?

Fuck no. I either start the day with water or pop depending on what time i wake up. (My life is a mess fam)

64. what color is the sky where you are right now?

Black. (I wanted to add some soul shit and a Zak vibe but it felt weird.)

66. what would your ideal flower crown look like?

HUGE and black and SPIKEY and unicorn horn AND FEATHERS

68. what's winter like where you live?

FUCKING COLD. TODAY I OS FEELING IN MY HANDS IN LIKE 2 MINUTES.

70. have you ever used a ouija board?

No. No one I know likes that shit. I want to fuck with stuff so bad, but i would have to trust someone enough to do it with.

72. are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you'll forget it?

No, but I make lists in my head as an anxiety thing.

74. describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns.

They love Tali, are cute af, and they love getting drunk and watching ghost adventures.

76. is there anything you should be doing right now but aren't?

YES. Sleep. I have to get up at 6:30 tomorrow and fly to Canada on Friday.

78. are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?

I am indifferent.

80. what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why?

Yellow and green, because I love me some late 60′s vibes.

82. are/were you good in school?

I was until 5th when my brain imploded.

84. are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones?

I WANT BESTIE TATTOOS. Also, I wish I could have 3/4 tattoo sleeves.

86. do you like concept albums? which ones?

I had to look that shit up. I don’t know that I have ever listened to one.

88. are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy?

Nooo? I  dunno. I’m not that deep. I like anime friends. Fight me.

90. talk about your one of you favorite cities.

I don’t have one. Montreal is pretty, but eh?

92. are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch?

No cheese, unless it’s on lasagna. In which case I would use tons of cheese.

94. who was the last person you know to have a birthday?

My middle sister. I was dd for my oldest sister. Fun times.

96. do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot?

I almost never shut my computer down. So I never know when I have them.

98. when's the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it?

Never and no. lol

100. if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?

Back. I like knowing whats going on and I hate change. Plus, do overs sound fun.

I AM SO TIRED, BUT THIS WAS GREAT FUN.

[peteypan232]

As noted from my previous posts, I’m a planner. A very shitty planner, as it were, since not a single one of my plans has ever really worked. Except for one: I got Frank to fall madly in love with me. But that story is for another day. So, it’s safe to say I’m a slow learner – I planned and prepared by body, mind and soul during those 9 months for an all natural birth, following the Bradley method. And then the day came when I received my very own human… Francis. Here is his birth story.

May 23rd 2017

4am: I woke up with contractions. I had a cup of raspberry leaf tea, sat in the living room, read a couple pages of one of my many pregnancy books and noticed these particular contractions were a bit different from my normal pregnancy ones. I decided to time them and noticed they had a pattern! DUDEeeee this is it. I started pacing around the flat and cleaning up like a mad woman – just waiting around for  Frank to wake up.

6:30am: The minute I hear his alarm go off, I burst into the room and in the calmest voice I possess, said “Hey, what’s up? There’s a slight chance I’m going into labor.” Frank had his typical ‘Rosie, you cray” look on his face. Probably because 1. I was leaning over his face real creepy. 2. I don’t think anyone would ever imagine me saying “I might be in labor” in a calm voice.

8am: I told Frank to go into work for a big meeting he was hosting that day and I would message him if anything changed. I felt good, I was excited, and I didn’t want to jinx it in case it was a false alarm. It was, after all, a week and a half before my American due date (40 weeks) and 2 weeks before my french due date (41 weeks).

10am: I cleaned the entire apartment, drank 4 cups of red raspberry tea, peed about 20 times and just couldn’t find the patience to pace about any longer. I put on a Harry Potter movie in the background while I napped.

12:30pm: I woke up from my Harry Potter induced nap (my favorite kind of napping) and received about 50 messages from Frank and discovered my contractions were completely gone. (insert sad emoji) Frank came home and we decided to go for a walk around the park, and after only a few minutes in, the contractions were back.

3pm: We went back home, I was bouncing around on the birthing ball, listening to my bad ass birthing playlist, practicing breathing techniques, having nervous poops every 30 minutes and just loving it.

5:30pm: We watched Adventures in Babysitting while I worked on the birthing ball and by the time the movie was over my contractions weren’t any closer together.

7:30pm: We went for another walk and things started to really pick up. We quickly tried making it through the park as it was closing soon, but my contractions were getting more intense so there was LOTS of stopping and moaning. Yes, people were staring – and the women with children were smiling. Although things were picking up speed and intensity, I still felt good – like I was still in charge. I kept telling Frank “yo, i got this”. 

8:15pm: We went home, I lit all the candles in the apartment and put on my birthing playlist all while I was pacing, dancing, bouncing, stretching, breathing, singing.

10:30pm: We put on Star Trek and didn’t make it 10 minutes into it when shit got cray. Everything thus far was gradual – and in a matter of minutes, seconds, shit got real.

11pm: My thought – ‘Alright, lets go”, but our birth plan included staying at home as long as possible before going to the hospital. Frank, being my birth partner told me he didn’t think it was time to go yet….. ok, I agreed with him. It couldn’t have been more than 5 contractions later, and I’m screaming some weird shit. I believe my exact words were “We gotta go! I’m fucking crowning!”.

May 24th 2017

this is the moment when time and space and sanity just completely escape me.

12am(ish): We get to the hospital and it was hot as balls. Hot, muggy, sweaty, balls. A goddamn incubator. The midwife examines me and said, and I quote “You’re about 1 cm, and I’m being gracious”.

Frank and I reflected and laughed our asses off about this later. Here is the 40 something year old midwife, with broken/limited english – and somewhere along his training or life experience, someone taught him the english word gracious. The guy didn’t know the word for clothing! But gracious fell into his vocabulary.

Fuck. I was barely 1 cm. It was well past midnight at this point so the midwife staff was shorthanded and they had an emergency on their hands. He said we could leave and come back, but fuck that. I’m crowning! Can you check again bro?! We waited there for what seemed like an eternity. I looked Frank directly in the eyes and told him, I can’t do this. I’m going to die. This is the end. I’m not going to survive this. 

1:30am(ish): When the midwife came back in he was covered in blood and super sweaty. Christ. What the hell is going on out there?! I told him I was going to die and that I needed the epidural. He moved me to the pre travail (literal translation, before work) room with a lay down bed and less harsh lights that took away the sterile hospital vibe. He put an IV in my arm.

Ok lets do this – bring on the epidural.

I’m sorry to say Ma’am, you have to be 3 cm.

ERMMMMM I was 1 cm HOURS ago – I’ve got to be 3 at this point.

Believe me, you’re not.

Check again bro.

I wasn’t.

3am(ish): My birthing playlist was playing repeat on the Jambox and it was pretty fucking intense. The pain was so real and I was exhausted – for the final hours in that room, I was passing out in between contractions. I had hit the 24 hour mark and could feel the crushing fatigue on my body.

5:30am(ish): The midwife comes back into the room to check me – just at 3 cm. He calls the anesthesiologist, sets me up in the birthing room and gets ready for a shift change.

6am(ish): I’m being set up for the epidural. That sweet, sweet epidural. Once they set it up, I had a few more painful contractions and then just like that, I could catch my breath and breathe again. The best way I can describe the feeling of an epidural: when your foot falls asleep, but before the pins and needles. I could still feel, but the pain was softer, like it was earlier in the day when this whole thing began. The new midwives said some words, but I instantly passed out.

7am(ish): I woke up an hour later, they were checking my dilation. 9 cm. 3cm to 9cm? oh sweet beautiful epidural. The new midwife said to me, “Your baby was waiting for you to relax”. They broke my water, emptied by bladder and I drifted back to sleep.

8:30am(ish): 10cm, I was fully dilated – but the baby was in the ‘sunny side up’ position, so they turned my legs and waited. My super hot doctor came in to say Hi, examine me, pep talk and explain that he had to deliver a c section baby, think you can hold on. oh yea. Per our birth plan, Frank was to help the doctor pull the baby out, so he had Frank take a look at my vagina. Frank looked up at me with his eyes full of tears. “I started crying back. Oh jesus christ… WHAT?! Is it a fucking mess down there?!”, “No” he said, “I can see our child’s head”.

9:40am(ish): The midwives start prepping me and my super hot doctor comes back in.  We’re ready. I was fucking ready.

9:57am: 5 pushes later, my birthing playlist still in the background, I delivered my child. The most powerful surge of energy was vibrating through my entire body, through the entire room. Frank helped pull our child out and brought him to my chest. He was so warm and so small. It was the most amazing moment in my life – the greatest high I have ever felt. I felt the entire universe vibrating through every part of my body. Have you ever had a panic attack? The way your body doesn’t feel like your own and you completely lose all sense of control. But rather than being fueled by overwhelming fear, or stress – it’s love and warmth, and happiness. I thought I was going to explode, implode. I had no idea what was happening next – I only had eyes for my baby. Baby was silent, laying on my chest, with eyes slightly open, looking at me.

It was me, and Frank and … wait, what’s the gender?! We didn’t even check. The midwife said “c’est un garcon”, it’s a boy. It’s Francis.

Me. Frank. Francis.

Just the 3 of us.

The day I birthed my human. As noted from my previous posts, I'm a planner. A very shitty planner, as it were, since not a single one of my plans has ever really worked.