#nah i shld finish this assignment but i'm hfksjfks all my energy left 💀
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i just wna write wtvr rn T_T
#🌙.vents#yk. writing even just abt wtvr takes my mind off a lot of things n simultaneously also uses up a lot of time#n it's exactly what i need rn. a distraction#nah i shld finish this assignment but i'm hfksjfks all my energy left 💀#just want to listen to music close my eyes n just. think of my wol n ocs#yk the month. nearly ends. n#for the past few years i don't fucking know what is up w march 😭😭#yikes trying to think back n i really don't want to think abt anything in 2020.#esp the.. no i swear i've been over it for so long but the trust issues man they're still here they haven't entirely left#oh i see how it is fuck you anxiety#oh no. i really hate this feeling so much#take me back to the excitement i felt when we finally bought ffxiv#take me back to when we cleared the whole of e12s tgther#take me back to that week when we talked every day n.. hfksjfks i still rmb you talking abt ucob :c#i miss their voices. the way they'd say my name. n the lil banter in the static#i miss going through shb n stb for the first time#i want to feel it again#when i first went to terncliff. the wonder i felt. such a lovely place.#each time i cried w haurchefant n emet-selch n#me smiling so much wnvr aymeric was there n then#i still rmb exactly how it felt when i was tearing up bcs of alphinaud in eulmore n. i was so very proud#alphinaud's so dear to me. his development n his character n him w his ideals n stuff is. i just. idk can relate a lot#n then drk yk i knew a lot of the quotes before finishing the quest but#i didn't know where or when it wld be so#'we are the stories we tell ourselves' that gave me so much comfort#not kidding when i started out ffxiv it was in a time i cld barely let myself cry but#ffxiv makes it so easy for me that's why i cried sm w the end of arr n heading to ishgard bcs that was hflsjfks 🥹#'i dont want the future. i just want to stay here..' or smth. rinoaaaaa hflsjfjsjfjs#need to play ffix n 7r again n.. sorry. sorry fuck#please. please just let time stop. i think too much n i wish i cld just have some more time
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