#nadir: okay i got his

[charlottedabookworm]

#2 - Horizon

feat Nadir

sticking with nadir for now lol. time will tell whether i end up writing with him the whole month or bouncing between multiple wols

The sky was on fire.

“First time seeing a sunrise, lad?”

Nadir tears his gaze away from the sky and directs it towards the man beside him. “I have seen many sunrises,” he says slowly, his heart beating a drum against his horns. He had taken the morning guard shift for half a decade, he had seen more sunrises than he could count but this… “But none like-”

The sky is on fire.

His hands shake at his side, each breath tinged with the scent of remembered smoke and iron, Yedlihmad is burning and there are screams in the air and-

“Ah,” the man - Staelwyrm? Stalwyrn? - says. “First time away from home? Never quite looks right when you’re starin’ at a different horizon, don’t matter how many different horizons you’ve seen.”

He breathes.

His gaze wanders back to the sky. It is a vivid, familiar shade of orange that sends a chill down his scales, but he forces his eyes to the horizon - to a sea the wrong shade of blue, to white sands and green fields. He lands upon the Eorzean city towering in the distance, the white stone a burnished orange. It still looks as if it is burning.

It is not his home.

This is not Thavnair.

“Everything is so different, here,” he whispers to himself, aching for his home. Nahbdeen would have nudged his shoulder and smiled, would have spoken endlessly of the beauty of the rising sun over Yedlihmad.

His brother isn’t here. He may never see him again and, even if he does, it will never been the same.

(Nahbdeen is alive to hate him and that makes this worth it)

Staelwyrn - he is certain that is his name - laughs softly. “Aye, it always is.”

Nadir stands at his side and watches the sun rise.

[sadquickchristmassnowman]

question for you all

(the husband is NOT abed. important info)

(read the tags for my “abbreviated” thoughts If You So Desire)

[saphhhiree]

hello!!!!!! i was wondering if u could write an abed nadir x reader mayhaps.. fluff or smut, i don’t mind !!!! i am so starved for abed content pleek.

HOLY SHIT HELLO MY FIRST FUCKING REQ????? HOLY SHIT YES OF COURSE ABED CONTENT IS LACKING!!! I WILL PROVIDE!!

introduction to art

abed nadir x reader

warnings: i’m very high so not proofread, nsfw, jeff’s ego, makeout, oral m!receiving, fingering, (in pt2) no pierce (i’m sorry but i won’t write anything pierce would do or say)

enjoy!! reader is afab if u didn’t want that i can change it if needed 🙏🏻🙏🏻 but gn prns!!! also! reader sits next to jeff in the open chair

“y/n? wake up!” opening your eyes while groaning softly “you can’t keep falling asleep, we need to keep studying” annie said rolling her eyes. “but this is borrrrriinnng” you yawn stretching your arms. “then leave, no one’s keeping you here yknow” annie crossed her arms while puffing her bottom lip. “gladly” you stood up but before you could pick your bag up, “you can’t.” you looked back up to the source of the voice, locking eyes with abed, his brows furrowed, “we have our art project due tomorrow.” he cocks his head slightly to the side awaiting your response. “so? you guys are studying for a class i don’t have with the rest of you, this is basically pointless for me. plus it’s almost 10, we all should be home right now.” you cross your arms, bag on your back ready to walk out. abeds mouth snaps shut as he looked to jeff as if he could stop you, jeff rolled his eyes saying “how about you and abed go to the other study room for your project and we can give him the notes tomorrow.” you practically wanted to murder jeff. 5 mins away from peaceful slumber yet now morally aware how unfair it was to leave abed to fend for himself. turning on your heels you walked to the opposite of the room “cmom im tired, let’s get this over with” tapping abed on his shoulder “aw, that’s nice.” shirley commented as abed packed up to follow you out in the direction of the other study room.

“what’s the assignment anyway?” you both put your bags down and sat next to eachother “expressing the human form and fabric texture” he pulls his notebook out, looking for the description of the assignment. “ah, okay…” you copy his actions, knowing you don’t have the notes because you fell asleep in the class. “since we’re partners on this one, you can be the model and i will draw it” abed says as he turns to you. “what? that’s not fair cmon.” you pout slightly, the thought of basically modeling for someone who you had feelings for was not something you wanted to do. “but you don’t have the notes” he points to your empty notebook then glancing at his notes. “fine.” you sigh and put your head in your hands awaiting further instructions. “it says arrange for a live model, examine the flow of fabric on the body while drawing it.” you get up, trying to hide the fact you were practically sweating, “draw me like one of your french girls, abed” you joke as he turns his chair around to look at you, “you have to be naked for that reference to work” he says looking down to start the sketch “what?? it was perfect timing, i think i hit the mark either way.” you groan back, “no, it doesn’t count, you can’t quote something that doesn’t apply to what’s happening. plus your not laying down” annoyed, you respond “yes i can! i can quote whatever i want! it doesn’t matter if i’m laying down naked or not.” you cross your arms. “yes it does.” he keeps sketching, “no, it doesn’t” “yes, it does.” “fine!” you yell, you’re tired and just wanted to make a joke, but now your irritated, you pull your sweater off, and next your pants. abed stares back at you, “you’re still not naked” he shakes his head almost burrowing it into his notebook, he’s seen half naked people before yea, but not you. you intrigued him, you never got mad at his ramblings, you watched kickpuncher with him when troy couldn’t, you’ve shown him movies you like, and he actually enjoys them. though you make crappy jokes about them, or *cough cough* quote them wrong *cough cough* something about you drew him in. he could read people so well, and he could read you too, but he still couldn’t figure out why he liked you so much. bringing him out of his thoughts you joke “why do you want me naked so bad?” “i don’t.” he lied. “so you think i’m ugly?” you push him further, “no” your laughter dies down, “oh?” you question, “wait. what’s happening? are you flirting?” he looks up at you, noticing that you’re a little too close than he remembers you being. “do you want me to be?” you ask looking down at your feet. he stands up, cocking his head to the side, looking down at you, “yes” he says.

PART TWO IS UP! NSFW! READ HERE, 18+ ONLY!

[grasshopperdoingdogpaddle]

Do you think Wuya and Hannibal mocked Chase about Omi's presumed death?

Oh they totally did, I have no doubt they had a betting pool going on it or something. The real question is did they manage to convince Chase that Omi really was gone for good? Was there a nadir where their words got to him and he had to accept that this was the end? Even if he was just wandering somewhere, 80 years is enough for a mortal human to just die naturally, right?

Chase was very concerned about Omi's sudden disappearance. I've mentioned it before, but Chase getting distracted by it probably played a role in his being defeated in the bad future. He makes the effort to keep tabs on Omi, and even Chase lost track of him.

But by the time he tells Omi that he was happy to see him safe and sound and he always knew their paths would cross again, I think he's being genuine and has already believed in that for a while at that point.

Hannibal and Wuya were taunting Chase on the matter while they were all trapped in the dungeon together, but that paradoxically solidified Chase believing that Omi really had to be okay and they'd see each other again.

One, out of pure stubbornness and spite for anything Wuya and especially Hannibal have to say. He's also extremely suspicious of everything either of them say.

And two, because it makes it increasingly clear that neither Wuya nor Hannibal nor Jack had anything to do with Omi's disappearance, so whatever it is is probably one of Omi's own antics.

Wuya's probably the one who would bring up the natural limits of a mortal human life, especially since Chase would probably lose track of such a short period of time in the grand scheme of an immortal life. But even then, Chase is so stubbornly convinced in Omi's potential and ability that he wouldn't even entertain the idea of Omi dying a quiet normal human's death.

[anghraine]

Sometimes, people suggest that Elizabeth is not truly romantically in love with Darcy towards the end of P&P, but just has a rational respect for his character (and property). Here are my three favorite pieces of evidence against it:

1- The coffee scene

When Darcy returns to Hertfordshire, there's a delightful period of frustrated pining between Darcy and Elizabeth. My personal favorite moment is at a gathering where Elizabeth is assigned to pour the coffee. She follows Darcy with her eyes, resents any not-her people he talks to, etc, and then gets mad at people for interrupting her by wanting coffee.

Absolutely top-tier content.

2- I do, I do like him; I love him.

Yeah, she does outright say she loves him.

There is something incredibly endearing about Elizabeth's struggle to defend her choice to her father—a choice that in this context represents many things, but IMO a big one is that she's both physically and emotionally moving beyond him.

It's also pretty funny that she has to wrangle with the legacy of Past Elizabeth's hot takes, it's bittersweet, it's a lot of things. But, ngl, my favorite part is when Mr Bennet concedes that the marriage is okay with him if she likes Darcy despite his pride and unpleasantness, and Elizabeth replies that she does like Darcy and she loves Darcy (both are important!) and it upsets her to hear him described that way. Just a lovely moment.

3- Lady Catherine v. Elizabeth

During Elizabeth's confrontation with Lady Catherine, she wonders how she could ever have thought Lady Catherine was similar to Darcy. I find this hilarious, honestly.

I mean, seeing Darcy's traits writ large in Lady Catherine is a perfectly natural and reasonable thing to do, even if it also flowed out of Elizabeth's prejudices at the time. Anyone would see the resemblance. But Elizabeth has got it so bad at this point that she's just like "how!!! could I have thought such a wrong and unfair thing." <3333

Honorable mention - Lydia aftermath

Elizabeth privately feels like she could have loved Darcy after he leaves her at the Lambton Inn post-Lydia disaster. It's only afterwards, out of scene and as the Lydia situation hits its nadir, that she realizes what her feelings for Darcy already are. It's a hellish time anyway, but she still owes half her sleepless nights to Darcy.

...out of dispassionate respect, I'm sure.

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision 2024: #36

36. FINLAND Windows95Man - "No Rules!" 19th place

Decade ranking: 143/153 [Above Nadir, below Let3]

Okay so, I promised in Saturday's post that I would try to be positive, but I may already have to rescind on that promise lol. (the "lol" is for punctuation because I definitely did not laugh.) "No rules!" stinks and has very few redeeming qualities. 🙂 Natalia was right, she WAS robbed by a Nudist Demon!

For real, does anyone over the age of twenty-five enjoy this dumpster fire? If so, fukk meee. LOVE YOURSELVES.

As I noted in my UMK review back in Feb:

I have difficulty buying into this hyperactive ball of bad taste. “Fuck The System” always feels like the go-to message of individuals that fail to fit into social structures that aren’t fully of their own shaping. For an entry that’s all “live as you like, there’s no rules!” in its messaging, these two look like they conform to just about every styling and behavioural rule associated with Zoomer culture: A total disregard for general aesthetics over a dumbed-down drone of a beat because everything is ironic and nothing is to be taken seriously.  It is a depressing take on life. Yeah sure, a bit of camp levity is welcome in this loathesome world, but any happy song that weaponizes irony like this one trends towards encouraging irresponsibility, cynicism and nihilism. Some things DO matter in life, you know? You need to afford your bills and groceries, charge your social batteries, cultivate your friendships, or else you’ll wind up living alone in a van, down by the river. But if the latter life appeals to you, then this is the entry for you, I guess. For me though; this contest is already has one Joost Klein. Let’s not add a second one from Finland.

Funny how I nailed that even before knowing the full extent of it. I ofc vastly underestimated how bad the live would be, and as soon as I'd seen it my scepsis immediately supernova'd into intense HATRED. If ONLY "Paskana" hadn't been weak as piss. Yes, the cringe in "No Rules!" is deliberate, obviously, I have a sense of humour. Having a sense of humour is why I hate it? How much "deliberated cringe" can one tolerate before concluding "nope, this is r o t t e n." Does it start with

THE BAD GUNTER IMPRESSION?

or

THE DONALD DUCKING?

or

CALLING HIMSELF" A QUEEN"?

or

screaming "SEE ME SLAYYYY" :proceeds to not slay: ?

It definitely ends in whatever this shot is supposed to be.

Humour is subjective sure enough, and Windowsninetycringeman's jokes fall flatter than a pancake á moi. Why is everything denim? Why is this THIRTY-NINE YEAR OLD MAN still engaging in toilet humour and internet speak? Grow the f up? The art lies in the execution and Finland showed neither. I do NOT like Europapa much, but having Finland and not Netherlands in the final vibes wrong on so many levels. Europapa at least had a clear plan and delivered its nonsense in contained, piecemeal doses? It was COMPETENT in what it attempted to be (A Televote Winner), not a lazy amalgation of simple-minded drunk jokes strung together over a Planet of The Bass megamix as some sort of a Hail Mary. Joost and Teemu represent the Expectations/Reality divide of Zoomer Nonsense and it was darksided that only the latter got to compete for points. But on top of that, Teemu was generally just full of shit? Hooray, an Old Millennial engaging in Zoomer Cringe who lets an actual zoomer do all the vocal heavy lifting, without giving him a single featuring credit. Yay! It's a painfully accurate depiction of what being a zoomer is like, but not an intentional one.

Also remember when Teemu said he would "try to discreetly approach the other contestants to find ways to show support for Palestine" (remember that this contest was supposed to be 'not political'?) Hm yes discreet. So discreet he declared his intentions to interviewers so that everyone would know it was HIS idea. "Discreet", human please. And the result of all that talk was...

(lol I'm SO making it sound like I care about what political standpoints any of these acts took, and I don't. But I do call out a fraud when I spot one.)

Yeah well thanks for trying, but I'd rather you hadn't. A statement you can apply to my feelings of the entry overall. Okay, we've reached full circle, time to move on to our designated palate cleanser because THIS page is a safe zone for people of good taste.

The universe where YLE overrules the results and sends THEM to ESC is the one where we head to Helsinki twice in a row.

THE RANKING

[transgenderswagcompetitions]

Okay! So I don't have an official bracket yet, but I finally got every character written down and determined who will be automatically going on to Round 1 and who will have to compete in preliminaries. Everyone automatically moving on to Round 1 had more than 1 submission, while everyone in the preliminaries only had 1 submission.

I will put together an official bracket tomorrow, but here's the list of competitors!

The characters automatically going on to Round 1 are:

Alex Fierro from Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard (4 submissions)

Shi Qingxuan from Heaven Official's Blessing (2 submissions)

Cheery Littlebottom from Discworld (2 submissions)

Nimona from Nimona (2 submissions)

Elle Argent from Heartstopper (2 submissions)

Eolo from The Raven Tower (2 submissions)

Anthony J. Crowley from Good Omens (2 submissions)

Kade West from Wayward Children (2 submissions)

Kel Brezon from Machineries of Empire (2 submissions)

The characters that will be competing in the Preliminaries are:

Rafe from Viscera

Rafe from The House of Whispers

Ash from DIE

Ash from Girl Haven

Jerico Soberanis from The Toll

Nadir from The Thirty Names of Night

Holly from The Mellification

Petrichor from Saga

Kazuhito "Kirito" Kirigaya from Sword Art Online

Aster Vanissen from Witch Boy

Sherlock Holmes from Sherlock Holmes

Vess from Invisible Kingdom

Tonkee Innovator Dibars from The Broken Earth Trilogy

Ben Van Brunt from Horseman: A Tale of Sleepy Hollow

Shuos Zehun from Machineries of Empire

Villy from Basil and Oregano

Valentine Weis from World Running Down

Howl Pendragon from Howl's Moving Castle

Hero from Something's Not Right

Dominic Seneschal from Terra Ignota

Firestar from Warriors

Enjolras from Les Miserables

Beatrice from Umineko no Naku Koro Ni

Axolotl from Wings of Fire

Isa from Transmuted

Inspector Javert from Les Miserables

Addy from Basil and Oregano

June Egbert from Homestuck

Alto from Your Mind is a Terrible Thing

David from Dark Currents

Monique from The Worm and His Kings

Viola Carroll from A Lady for a Duke

Will Avery from Names for the Dawn

Qven-and-Reet from Translation State

Syd from The Heartbreak Bakery

Claire/Claude from Baker Thief

Cersei Lannister from A Song of Ice and Fire

Will Treaty from Ranger's Apprentice

Starflight from Wings of Fire

Yadriel from Cemetery Boys

Zila from Aurora Cycle

Kaladin Stormblessed from The Stormlight Archive

AR/Lil Hal from Homestuck

Zoe from Sleepless Domain

Sera from Angela: Queen of Hel

Max Owen from Magical Boy

Jonathan Harker from Dracula

Diana Wrayburn from The Shadowhunter Chronicles

Abraham Van Helsing from Dracula

Never from Skulduggery Pleasant

Benji/Benjamin from Hell Followed With Us

Brick from Warriors

Sidra from Wayfarers

Sascha Vykos from Vampire: The Masquerade

Penfield from Future Feeling

Sallot Leon from Mask of Shadows

Ieshwi from The Stormlight Archive

Vriska Serket from Homestuck

Orlando from The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen

Spencer Harris from The Passing Playbook

Jane Crocker from Homestuck

Lupe from Four Leaf

Trina Goldberg-Oneka from The Seep

Cassandra Igarashi from The Wicked + The Divine

Aya Burnstein from Dancing in the Devils Auditorium

Lucus from High Class Homos

Merlin from The Left Handed Booksellers of London

Nightheart from Warriors

Sol from Dead Collections

Max from Magical Boy

Artemis Fowl from Artemis Fowl

Teo from The Sunbearer Duology

Wanda from The Sandman

Tal Smithson from Time to Orbit: Unknown

Petey the Cat from Dog Man

Captain Artemisia Blastside from Piratica

Rosa from Threads That Bind

Alter Boi from House of Whispers

Wegg from Be Kind, My Neighbor

Loki from Loki: Agent of Asgard

Scorn from Emergent Properties

Alanna of Trebond from The Song of the Lionness

Marcia Overstrand from Septimus Heap

Sage from Strawberry Seafoam

Jules from The Chromatic Fantasy

Peter Parker from The Amazing Spider-Man

Razia Khan from Stealing Thunder

Dipper Pines from the Gravity Falls comics

Mel from Something's Not Right

Hero Shackleby from American Hippo

Kino from Kino's Journey

The Marquis de Carabas from Neverwhere

River Runson from The Melting Queen

Jonathan Morgan from All the White Spaces

Leigh Hunter from Grey Dawn

Xada from LoveBot

Ienaga Kano from Golden Kamuy

Viola/Cesario from Twelfth Night

Silas Bell from The Spirit Bares Its Teeth

Let me know if I accidentally have a character on this list twice! Also let me know if you see anything misspelled or under the wrong book or series. Basically, let me know if I've screwed up lol

Thank you all for your continued patience!

[centrally-unplanned]

Okay so since we did Chinggis, how about the other Big Conqueror Generals? Alexander of Macedon, Attila, Timur, Napoleon?

(Several asked for some of these in other asks)

Alexander the Pretty Good: So at this point I think everyone knows that his father Phillip was the "state builder", who created the new systems of Macedonian drill and mobilization infrastructure, handing Alexander a strong army he did not build. And Greece really was hitting a nadir of power, the post-Spartan era fragmenting alliances and exhausting the stronger city states. So it is fair to say that Alexander is overvalued, any Macedon king probably could have taken over Greece at that time. Additionally, when you study his "vast" conquests, its actually really just Greece & then Persia like five times, its him beating one opponent and then mopping up, and having the material advantage most of the time once you get rid of the hagiography.

But starting from Alexander the Great's height gives you an extremely long way to fall; he is overvalued, but still incredibly high VOR. He has the irreplaceable synergistic value of ambition & charisma; he decided to conquer the world, and got a huge list of allies, often ones he had himself fought in battle, to help him do it. Most people never conceive of that as actually being possible - in particular Alexander was not provoked or forced into his confrontations with Persia (establishing hegemony over Greece was more of a coincidence, but I think he would have found an excuse). And while his military achievements are exaggerated he obviously was talented, particularly at logistics - projecting power that wide is a nearly unparalleled feat in his time, and not something Macedonia was built to do before him. So I will go with A+

Atilla is discussed here, weak, C-/D+

Timur - never studied him actually! Its my issue being a Europe & East Asia guy, I know Gengis/Temujin because he is tied up with the Jin, but Timur never quite got around to the Ming conquest

Napoleon: Very complicated, provisional opinions. The Napoleonic wars scope is in fact quite contingent; its a constant back and forth of revolutionary ambition from France to spread itself, reactionary forces in the monarchies to fight back, rebellions and opportunities. Napoleon was not someone who engineered the whole thing by any means, he was given a chance to shine and he took it. Revolutionary France, constantly at war, was pretty much always going to arrive at something like a military leadership.

Additionally, he often gets too much credit for civil reforms of things like the Napoleonic Code; the process for formulating the Code started in the first National Assemblies in 1791, and multiple drafts of a new, universal code had been made when Napoleon was in power. He ordered it to stop dillydallying and make it happen, don't get me wrong, that is points. But its also the kind of thing dictators can do, right? So its a bit of a question of how likely a military ruler centralizing authority at all in France was. I think kind of high? I don't view Napoleon as an Augustus figure. So I think his VOR would have had kind of similar power. Napoleon did not have grand insights into what the legal code should, from what I know. On things like these I think he is getting credit for the fact that his name in in the title that maybe he shouldn't.

But there is a reason he became Emperor of France - he is a grade A military genius. His rep here is deserved - of course he was taking advantage of smart officers, existing innovations, etc, dude ain't forging cannons himself. But he put it all together, truly did push the use of artillery forward, and he was tirelessly creative on the battlefield. He was a famous workaholic, memorizing every map and coordinating every part of the battle himself, in ways that just put him ahead of the curve of his opponents. He is a classic OODA loop guy - he is getting information, putting a plan forward, getting new information, and pivoting the plan faster than everyone else, and he keeps winning on the back of it.

And then the rep you get from that string of wins inspired morale, commitment, diligence, and more from his men and officers that compounds. That last part is important - making an army takes time, its about relationships. You couldn't just slot the Duke of Wellington in as commander of the French and expect it to work the same. Due to that, the VOR for having Napoleon leading your armies in 1805 is literally irreplaceable. There is not single other person in existence who can deliver greater value, and I think that is very clear - and at margins that are very rare.

But of course he has his share of mistakes, particularly in naval affairs, over time his enemies internalize his innovations, and his reach exceeds his grasp. In particular he had multiple opportunities to "settle" for gains where France is first amoung equals, and he doesn't take it, and it all comes undone. He could have been S tier if he learned that. But alas, I think it puts him at A.

[did-i-mention-the-shirt]

okay okay yes i KNOW i should be writing my fanfic BUT

Community characters as AJJ songs bc it's my favorite show and favorite band :] (If you want anyone added, feel free to ask!) Jeff Winger - Brave As A Noun. Okay, hear me out. This song not only applies to him lyrically but also shares the energy he has in the later seasons. He's just forcing himself to be satisfied with a life he doesn't really want, but also doesn't hate, is very season six finale. That is very much BAAN.

Britta Perry - Dissonance. It really has her energy. From the pilot to the finale, it fits her consistently despite her major character change. She is not put together. She hates herself because everyone's told her to. Britta is the best, but no one sees that. Not even herself. The only people who treated her with respect were the people she spent the least amount of time with! Think about it, she's had - what? - One touching scene with Duncan and Pierce each? She deserves more.

Abed Nadir - Goodbye, Oh Goodbye. Just listen to the song and you'll agree. This is mostly because of Troy's departure or in Abed's Uncontrollable Christmas. Whenever he has to confront his emotions, he has this distance between himself and everyone else. The opening lines, "I was thrown onto the ground/I was locked inside a basement/The guards went on vacation while I plotted my revolt." really, really, REALLY reminds me of 'Virtual Systems Analysis' when Annie's talking to Abed in the mind locker. It's a sad song, but it really fits him. The line "It's nothing like the nothingness that normally numbs one pain" is very clearly related to Troy. He got so used to Troy, and he never took him for granted, but Troy became a constant. He was Abed's anchor, and now he's gone.

Annie Edison - No one. This is Annie, particularly as the Ace of Hearts in 'A Fistful Of Paintballs'.

Troy Barns - A Big Day for Grimley. It's giving post-sea voyage Troy. He's changed, he's traumatized, and he's a little bit alone. He's proud of himself but is full of regret. What happened to Abed? He doesn't know.

Pierce Hawthorne - People Ii: The Reckoning. THIS IS PIERCE!!! Now, many of you know I love Pierce, so if you don't then you might not agree with this choice lmao

Pierce is sad. He is so sad. In Britta's words, he has spent so long looking out for himself, but he would give it all up for a shot at a family. He never gets that family. The study group never fully accepts him, despite his efforts and his becoming a better person with their help. Even Annie, the nicest to him in the group, seems to see him as a project or something. Like, he's just some old racist, homophobic old man, and not someone with 60+ years of trauma that he gradually works through with the help of his friends. He gains a brother. He defends the LGBTQ+ community. He wants nothing more than to be close to Jeff. And he dies alone.

So, yeah. "Here's to you Mrs. Robinson, people love you more, oh nevermind."

Dean Craig Pelton - Human kittens. No, I don't know why. Someone needs to give him a hug (Jeff).

Ben Chang - Dipping Things In Stuff. I don't know, he's batshit. He wants love though, just like the rest of us. This is very seasons 5/6 of Chang, I believe.

Buzz Hickey - Hate, rain on me. Tired, nihilistic, and praying for hope. I really like this song for him.

Elroy Patashnick - Normalization Blues. Don't ask me why. It works.

Ian Duncan - Fucc The Devil. Sad, distant, desperate, and hallow. But enough about Duncan. This song is the perfect example of, "I have what I want. Why am I still not okay?" which is what Duncan faces a lot. "I wanna go away for a while/Away for awhile/Because the things that I have seen/Are turning me into a shitty human being." Look me in the eyes and tell me that's not Ian. This man deserves so much more then people will let him have. Don't get me wrong, he's awful. But aren't we all, just a little bit?

Frankie and Shirley are too sane for this band im sorry to them

[couchcandy]

Psych x Community ??

I love psych and i love community so this vague concept of them existing in the same universe has been floating around in my head. 

The key connecting factor being the references to Shawn/Britta’s similarly eclectic off-screen pasts. They're close in age so I'm like okay - it would totally be possible for them to have known eachother/dated/whatever at some point before. 

psych aired from 2006 - 2014; Shawn born 1977

community aired from 2009 -2014; Britta born 1980

(Take these two quotes just as an example but it's referenced casually throughout both shows)

Britta’s Dad: I mean, every time we get too close, you run off. We sent you a birthday card to your apartment in New York, and the next week you’re setting fire to a Jamba Juice in San Jose.

Britta: How long is that gonna stick with me?

Britta’s Mom: Until arson is legal, sweetie.

Gus: Shawn, you’ve had fifty-seven jobs since we left high school.

Shawn: Yes I have. And they were all fun. But this one takes the cake.

Gus: Oh yeah? Better than the acupuncture clinic?

Shawn: I didn’t realize experience was necessary.

Gus: What about the summer you spent driving the weiner mobile?

Shawn: I did that for the hot dogs.

I think they fit somewhere in the ballpark of each other's types, both sluts(affectionate) and it makes sense for them to have crossed paths at some point during Britta's “anhercists” days. 

So that establishes a link between the groups, but what would it be like if they interacted? Take the arbitrary scenario; Shawn and Gus have gotten themselves and by extension the SBPD into another whacky shenanigan somehow who cares how i'm not writing this

I imagine initially everyone in the study group has a more or less positive impression of Shawn because he's charming, (with the notable exception of…you got it! Jeff)

JEFF

In typical jeff fashion is immediately threatened by Shawn because he has to be the coolestmostlikeabledude™ in the room at all times while simultaneously has to act like he doesn't care so he's quietly seething and - hey what's this new dude doing here making all my friends laugh that's my job! i must now make it my life's mission to prove this guys a fraud and reclaim my status no matter how much a fool i make of myself in the process (a la: advanced documentary filmmaking)

BRITTA

Normal standard “hey old friend” situation, remember when we *insane thing involving multiple felonies and property destruction* haha anyway let me introduce you to my friends - 

ANNIE

immediate skepticism that Shawn is able to sidestep pretty quickly by being charming/flirty (NOT in a gross way *hisses at the jeffannie shippers*) Her reaction being like when the dean “swaps bodies with jeff” or after abed’s don draper impression.

ABED

Knows Shawn isn't really psychic but goes along with it/doesn’t point out that Shawn’s hyper observant because he's invested in watching the psychic/cop show formula play out. He would! and I would too!

(quote from 5x03 Basic Intergluteal Numismatics):

Abed Nadir: [Pretending to read the crime scenes as a psychic] I see a man... using a social disorder as a procedural device. Wait, wait, wait, I see another man. Mildly autistic super detectives everywhere.

TROY

Obligatory: “you’re wrinkling my brain right now” and just general fascination, awe, and wonderment. Asks Shawn to tell him his future

SHIRLEY

Immediate judgment on Shawn's practices not being christian enough for her standards, but easily swayed to liking him once he picks up on something and comments on her ex husband being an idiot to lose her or something

PEIRCE

Does his peirce thing and tries to seem impressive and fails, something level five laser lotus blah blah - u get it thats enough on him 

THE DEAN

Is facilitating the psych crew being there because it might bring in good press for greendale and he def does the hand on shoulder thing when he meets him you know the one - omg and totally is into Lassiter furrowed brows “im packing heat” Carlton, please. – lassie is Not Amused™ 

CHANG

This depends on what point in community canon this interaction takes place because season 1 chang would prob be normal(for him), but like season 5 Chang would do/say something so insane and so chang that i can't even come up with it

As for our psych guys, Gus points out how weird and fucked up and bizarre Greendale is meanwhile Shawn is LIVING for it - signs them up for the Dean’s PA announcements class, and “Gus! buddy! I hope you don't mind. I used your credit card to sign us up for The History of Ice Cream. Come on, it starts in 20 minutes ! :D” Gus: “Shawn! >:0”

Lassie would just nonstop point out all the health and safety violations- he doesn't want to be here- calls a lot of people hippies, generally grumpy demeanor and we love him for it.

Starburns terribly hits on Jules - gets rejected, proceeds to try and sell her drugs - gets arrested.

[valentine-cafe]

Your scary characters' reactions to a (likely lost) kid approacing them and "adopting itself"? 😂

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ ALESSIO 781 ꒱ immediately goes with it. scoops you off and carries you off to the nearest diner to spoil you with all sorts of desserts or whatever it is you want. it’s only when rishen and talisen see him there with a kid that he informs them of their new child.

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ HERRERA HUSBANDS 209 ꒱ don’t even question. you’re their child now. immediately take you home, immediately give you a room. adoption papers? they don’t need that. it’s fine, rishen will pull a few strings and that’s done and dusted. you are now the child of two of the most dangerous people in the world — and they love you.

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ HAITĀO 209 ꒱ is concerned to say the least. will check in on where your parents are and if they’re good people. if they’re not - well, he’s sure his spectre will have a feast. but he can’t keep you so - he might hand you over to one of his associates.

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ PRIMORDIAL HUSBANDS 164 ꒱ also do not question it they are IMMEDIATELY stealing you away. through the forest and to the cottage. you’re their child now and as their child you need to eat because it’s going to be lunch soon.

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ ALESSIO 9948E ꒱ feels the last shred of his sanity slip away. also asks about your parents and discovers whether or not they’re good people. and if they’re not - well - “uh. . . I know a place.” and so mèng yáo answers the door to a knock and the sound of sprinting — only to find a child standing there confused

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ JINGESSIO 1311 ꒱ thinks that surely they can keep you - they’ve always wanted a kid. right? they quickly discover that it might not be the best idea BUT they’ll make sure that you get a good home.

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ RISHEN 1311 ꒱ takes you in immediately. no questions asked. yes he’s busy - it’s fine. he’ll make a plan. he’s not letting a child that seems to have nowhere to go alone. nope.

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ RISHEN 9948V ꒱ PANICS. he can’t look after a kid - especially not if that fucking phantom and bane of his existence has anything to say about it. “. . . okay - okay, I know a person.” let’s just say he transformed into 9948e rishen to sneak into nadir, and drop you off in a particular citadel. with a confused 9948e jìngyí who wakes up to a random child.

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ VALERIUS ꒱ immediately scoops you up and takes you to the material plane. straight to his girlfriend.

⊹ ۪ ࣪ ꒰ JÌNGYÍ VERSELESS ꒱ is more confused how the hell you got into the abhorration. picks you up and observes you. are you a demon? doesn’t seem like it. but he too knows a person - let’s just say that you’re suddenly in the 781 trio’s dorm

[mirasmirages]

Scars (part 3)

first previous masterlist next

Has: mentions of past trauma

James and his family belongs to @starliight-whump

~

Julia carried James's cup of coffee on the table for him. "I'll pick you up in twenty minutes, okay?"

James nodded. "Yeah."

"And if you need me, you can call. I won't be far."

She put the coffee on the table outside the small café, and James sat down across from Nadir, his high school boyfriend.

"Hey," Nadir said when Julia left.

"Hi."

For a moment, neither of them knew what to say. They hadn't stayed in touch after Nadir left for college, sixteen years ago. James was struck by how long it had been. Sixteen years since they dated. Half his life. He put his hands around his cup, but didn't lift it.

"So," Nadir said, hesitating to break the silence. "How are your parents doing?"

"They're good," James said. That wasn't entirely true. He had heard them talk when they thought he wasn't listening. He knew his mother would go down to the basement to cry so she could be strong in front of him. Not the best topic for catching up with a friend. James didn't know how much Nadir knew about what had happened to him, and didn't want to ruin this by bringing anything up. "Um. Julia says you're a fireman now?"

"I am!" Nadir said, smiling. Trying too hard to act normal, or just hard enough. Or maybe he was just being normal. Maybe James was overthinking it. "I really love it, helping people when they need it most. I never have to doubt if I'm doing something important, you know?"

James nodded. He had felt like that too, when he was in surgery. It was hard to argue he wasn't doing something important when he was fixing someone's heart after an acute heart failure.

"Or, at least, most of the time," Nadir continued, when James didn't say anything. "A few days ago, a kid called in for help, because his cat was stuck in a tree. It was a quiet day, so we went to save it. And the cat was furious, hissing and clawing at me, but I got it down, right? Handed it to the kid, and the cat twisted free and went straight back up the tree." He laughed. "At least I got a story out of it."

James laughed too, small but real. "I didn't know firefighters actually did that. I thought it was only on TV."

"Well, it's not exactly part of the job description," Nadir said. "But if we have the time for it, why not?"

James was looking for something else to say, to keep up the flow of the conversation, when Nadir looked at something behind him. He tensed instinctively, and turned to see Henry, the librarian, walking toward them, a hand lifted in greeting.

It was a coincidence, it had to be. There was no way Henry would know where James would be. There was no reason for him to care. And yet, James had that jolt of fear that screamed "DANGER!"

"Hey," Henry said, looking at Nadir.

"Hey," Nadir said, and glanced at James, which made Henry look at James, which made Henry recognize James, which left James completely unable to find his voice.

"Oh, hey," Henry said, still looking at James. Then he turned to Nadir and said, "I'm interrupting something, aren't I? I'll leave. See you Tuesday."

"Yeah, see you," Nadir said as Henry left, and then he turned a serious gaze on James. "Are you okay?"

James wanted to brush it off and pretend it was nothing, he really did, but the way he was shaking, there was no way Nadir would believe him. He buried his face in his hands.

"It just keeps getting worse!" he said, and slid his hands up to grip at his hair. Numb prickling radiated through his fingers, and he could barely put any force into the movement. "It's been two months, and I'm scared all the time, and it's not getting better, and I'm never gonna work again, and for some reason, every time I see that man, I think he's going to take me away and make me go through everything again!"

It felt good to say it, even if it ruined any chance of this being a normal conversation. James was exhausted with normalcy. He kept trying for it, and it never fucking worked. The best he could do was to hope the people around him believed it while he kept feeling as awful as always. He wiped his eyes on his sleeve, so Nadir wouldn't have to see him cry.

"Hey," Nadir said in a careful voice. "Can I take your hand?"

James sniffled and gave a nod, but didn't look up at him. Nadir took James's left hand, the one that could still mostly feel, in both of his.

"All of this is a normal reaction to what you went through," Nadir said. "It's only been two months. That's nothing. You're going to get better, you just have to give it time."

"You don't even know what I went through," James mumbled.

"Not the details of it, no," Nadir agreed. "But I know it was bad. I know you spent two weeks in the hospital after they found you. I know how scared Julia was when you stopped picking up the phone. I know about the trial."

James swallowed. The trial was one of many things he tried not to think about. In just a few months, he would have to testify, and he would have to see him again.

Nadir squeezed his hand. "We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," he said. "I'm just saying, if you do want to, it's okay."

James shook his head. Talking about it would be a bad idea. Especially in public.

"Um," he said, looking for something else to steer the conversation toward. "How do you know Henry?"

"We were roommates in college," Nadir said. "How do you know Henry?"

"He's Oliver's favorite librarian. And, um." James hesitated. "And he kind of tried to flirt with me at a bar and I had a panic attack."

Nadir's eyebrows rose. "You went to a bar?"

James nodded. "Julia went with me. I wanted to see if I could do it, but it didn't go well."

"And when you said you think 'that man' is going to take you away … you meant Henry?"

"Yeah." James swallowed. "He took me outside when I panicked. I think he was trying to help, but at the time … it didn't feel that way."

"I'm sorry." Nadir's eyes softened. "If it helps, I don't think he would ever hurt you."

"I know that," James sighed. "I know most people are just normal people and aren't out to get me, I just- I just feel things, before I have time to think about it."

"You could ask him to keep his distance," Nadir suggested. "He would, if you asked."

James pulled his hand back so he could bury his face in his hands again. "That's not the point," he said in frustration. "If it's not him, it's someone else. It's walking in the woods and it's rooms with brick walls and it's men in suits and it's rain. It's not about him, it's about everything!"

Nadir was silent for a moment, giving James time to stew in his own thoughts.

"Do you want to meet him?"

The question surprised James into looking at Nadir.

"If you don't want him to stay away, maybe it would help to meet him in a safe environment. Maybe it will help you be less afraid."

"Maybe," James mumbled. He wasn't sure how he felt about his frustration being met with solutions. He wasn't sure he was ready for solutions. "Do you think he would do that?"

"I don't see why not," Nadir said. "I bet it would help him too, to know it's not his fault you're scared of him."

James nodded slowly. He hadn't thought about how Henry would feel about his panic attacks. He already knew he was making things harder for his family, but now he was doing it to strangers, too. That wasn't who he wanted to be.

"I'll try," James decided. "If he wants to."

next

[paperandsong]

I present a list of 16 Underappreciated fics with recommendations in the authors’ own words, taken from responses to this post: Unloved Fic Tag Game. Most are Phantom of the Opera fics, but there is one from Rebecca and another from Elisabeth. Take a chance on these hidden gems - many authors say these are their best work. They were written with love. 

Remember that it is never, ever too late to give kudos and leave comments on fics - no matter how old they are!

All Imaginable Pangs by @les-gnossiennes-fantomatiques​: It’s a pre-canon Leroux fic set towards the end of the 1860s, told from the point-of-view of a well-to-do Parisian courtesan. Do you like people talking about art and the nature of creating things? Do you like angst about growing older and not feeling at home in your own skin? Do you like lots of incredibly awkward smut and romance?

Annard Noz by @paperandsong:  Little Christine and Raoul roam around Perros-Guirec collecting stories until a vexed old woman frightens them with the legend of the Laveuses de nuit. I wrote this for the Légendes rustiques project which uses French legends recorded by George Sand and reimagines them as stories Christine and Raoul may have heard as children. If you like folklore you might be interested in this series. 

Beneath the Winter Snow by @pianomanblaine​: I wrote this story for the Advent Calendar a few years back. It was the first fandom event I participated in after picking up writing again a few months before, and the response I got made me feel very welcome here. It’s a simple and very fluffy oneshot, and I had a lot of fun writing it, so I hope people will have fun reading it as well.

The Day My World Crumbled by @nerdywriter36​: It’s a Nadir/Rookheya fic, which is definitely a rarepair only familiar to those who know Susan Kay’s book. It was basically just a way for me to flesh out part of their story that had been plaguing my mind for a while that needed to get let out.

The Dead Are Gone, They Don’t Come Back by @conquerthenight​: (Mind the tags) Normally I cringe when reading my own writing, but I have yet to do so for any of this series. I would recommend this series to: anyone who wants a reason for Ileana to be so unconfident and scared other than “she just is”, anyone who either wants Maxim redeemed or wants any insight into his POV because the fourth work in this series explores his POV, anyone who wants to read from Rebecca’s POV (the second work in the series is from her perspective), anyone who read the novel Lolita who would’ve rather read from Dolores’ POV instead of Humbert’s, and anyone who believes recovery fics help them cope with trauma.

Digging into the Youth that is you by @enigmawritesstuff​: What you get is a dynamic that deals with trauma in a healthy, heartfelt and loving way, that makes you feel seen and touched. It helps me feel that there is hope that one day you'll be understood as you need, or want, to be, and that's okay. To need someone to help you stand sometimes. Which is why this phic is actually quite dear to me.

A Fierce Inequality of Love by @shinyfire-0​: My most underappreciated fic is the first fic I ever wrote. I wrote it in the late 90s or early 2000s, back when fandom was brutal and people gave vicious reviews if they didn't approve of a fic. This was one was castigated because (spoiler!) Christine does not stay with Erik. I love the tragedy of the man, and so I LOVE a tragic ending for him. And maybe, despite the fact that she escapes him, it's a tragic ending for Christine, too.  Anyway, this one came straight from the heart.

Les Flambettes by @textsfromthefifthbasement​: I think it's probably not as popular due to the archive warning and the fact that it sounds like an R/C fic. But it is a horror story involving the trio with a braided structure alternating between past and present. Part of the Légendes rustiques project. 

Mirrorverse Addendums by @sarcasticdolphin: I know it is a bit dense - there’s a lot of history to cover, and I want to do it correctly. Elisabeth das Musical fandom as a whole lends pretty well or being fandom-blind as it is quite close to historical fiction. 

Notre Dame des Lorettes by @catcorsair​: This is a short prequel story centered on Erik that takes place during the paused construction of the Garnier amidst the fall of the Paris Commune of 1871. Just give it a shot! It’s such a short little one shot, and frankly, I think it’s probably my best fic in terms of writing.

Our Love Brings Ruin by @battydings​: For anyone who wants to read a story about the complicated feelings that revolve around validation and being wanted/needed, but don’t mind a bit of death, this story is for you. Because more than being a story about a couple who are complicit in murder together, it’s about a woman who is willing to step over her own personal values in the name of validation.

Phantoms of Paris by @lincolnlogger​: If you're looking for a story where Andre, yes Manager Andre, gets a lot of narrative POV privileges, you've come to the right place. If you want Erik facing his past head-on via therapy sessions, you've come to the right place. If you want Nadir hanging on by a thread, you've come to the right place.

Philia by @brendadaaedestler: One of the main characters featured in the one shot is a character from Susan Kay’s novel, which [you] not many have read, though you don’t need to have read Kay’s novel to understand the one shot. You would probably like [it] if you enjoy reading fluff content.

Unexpected Variables by @meilas​: Beauty and the Beast 2017. I thought it was funny when I came up with the idea. I actually don't care if anyone else reads it or not.

Vainement, ma bien aimée by @illuminaughti-online​: I think "Vainement" might be my best-written from a technical sense. Also? I genuinely like these kids, as well as the folklore and a nice creepy setting. Give Baby Raoul a chance and you might wind up rooting for him after all as he tries to come to terms with the fact that the world is a terrifying place and that Christine intends to plunge into it headfirst regardless. Part of the Légendes rustiques project. 

You are Music by @apileofpans​: If you like E/C/R getting together in a healthy way with a healthy dose of communication and understanding between the three of them, this is the fic for you! There is a scene between everybody one on one and I just… GAH!!!! It’s like a wonderful hopeful fic with promises to come, it’s just like. Comforting in a way!!!

photo by @shinyfire-0​

[hardchoicespod]

How good do Spider-Man villains bang?

[We're not talking about hotness. This is only about what they bring to the bedroom]

Norman Osborn is a shit f*ck. FINDOM THIS DOOFUS 🤑🤑🤑 Unless you want to hear that screechy ass Green Goblin voice. You want to hear him tell you hard he's gonna nut in that voice?

2. Doctor Octopus? WHAT A F*CKING ROMANTIC! LOOK AT THAT FACE! Do you not think he brings flowers??? Man has trained each limb to make you scream in a different way.

3. J. Jonah Jameson. Not technically a villain, but like, don't you want to fuck this absolute smug asshole bastard? LEAVE THE CIGAR LIT, BABYEEEEE

4. Venom is the ultimate goo husband and will love you and keep you safe and eat pop-tarts with you at 3am, but also, he got that tooooongue 👅👅👅

5. Mephisto is gonna make you think he's f*cking you and then suddenly, from the mists of this incredible performance of raw sexual power, he appears and then does a comedy 💦 on you because motherf*cker can't resist. Do you want this dude to nut on your tits and then laugh at his own dumbf*ck genius?

6. Rhino is a problem. Look, is the dick trapped in the suit or not? If this is hardcore chastity play, okay. Okay, we can fuck like that Rhino. But don't you want this weirdo to just cut loose and pound you so hard the neighbors call your super? HE IS A FULL TIME FURRY AND ALSO DOES CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!?! Find out about that dick situation first tho, probably.

You want more lovingly horny takes about these dorks? listen to Hard Choices 26 - Spider-Man and get all the boners you can possibly handle. Episode description? Babe, I got you.

We all know that with great power comes great responsibility. You know what else comes with great power? Us when we think about Spider-Man! It's not just Peter Parker who makes our web-shooters go thwip, either; he's got a huge cast of friends, foes, and supporting characters to suit every taste, from monsterfucks like Venom, to adorable loser fucks like The Shocker, to the jackpot herself, Mary Jane. This episode, your friendly neighborhood MeganBob pushes DEEP into the Spiderverse to find the median, the zenith, and the nadir of its fuckability, all with the help of: The Amazing Annie Craton! The Spectacular James D'Amato! And Dan Mulkerin from an alternate reality where he never lost his Captain Universe powers! IN THIS ISSUE: Dan single-handedly promotes Tombstone from D-tier to Daddy-tier MeganBob discovers the only bad way to listen to "The Cruel Angel's Thesis" Annie lets Carnage's gooey appeal blind her to his, you know, everything else And James finally takes a public stance on whether eating boys is wrong!

Is this podcast safe for work? F*ck no it isn't. Is this going to make you laugh so hard you snort a cheeto? Yeah, probably. Jump to anywhere in the episode for takes that will make you go "Ya'll need god."

Big Sloppy Kisses, Hard Choices 💋🍆

Which spidey character's are your top three f*cks? We won't tell.

[selchwife]

idk if ive talked here about the. most of star war au tbh? hard to summarize. rambling incoming

essentially. pfeil was prince of zygerria, but it sucked for numerous reasons (terrible fascist hell culture, abusive family, etc). his mom was physically violent and during one altercation he freaks out and kills her with the dark side of the force. like jsut explodes her. obviously being like 15 he panics and flees the planet as a stowaway on the first ship he can find.

he ends up on this planet I MADE UP <3 called orphan, which is an orphan planet (hence the name). it's home to an imperial shipyard, and in essence it kind of functions like a prison colony and general shunting-off place for Undesirables. nothing grows there, it's all solid ice, its day-night cycle is managed by a big stupid orbital lamp and the ice crystals in the air cause a lot of optical illusions. the overseer lets him stay on the condition that he work, and everyone sort of quietly overlooks the fact that he gives a fake name and doesn't legally exist and the obviousness of like. i mean come on this little zygerrian guy shows up and then a few days later you hear on the news that their prince is missing and his mom is dead? DUH

anyway. orphan sucks, the optical bullshit and isolation and bad safety standards and all cause a LOT of industrial accidents and general malaise. pfeil just kind of absorbs this horrible atmosphere and gets mad about it and mad at the empire and it all sort of festers until someone Else gets into an accident and he's had Enough and steals a ship to go attack the first imperial operation he comes across and hopes he'll just get blown up. instead thrawn grabs him, and he does his typical thing of like "oh hmmm, he might be useful later," and essentially lets him go and leads him to the ghost crew.

i think pfeil meets up with everybody after the shit with maul, so between seasons 2 and 3. obviously kanan doesn't like him bc he's got the most rancid dark side vibes humanly possibly (felinely possible?) but ezra likes him. pfeil gets weird about kanan thinking he's ontologically evil since he's already got massive guilt issues and ocd also. everybody else is some level of cool with him though. he and zeb get along particularly well since they're the least humany of the crew i think, and obviously he has force shit in common with ezra and an interest in art in common with sabine. hera just kind of adopts him

i tend to imagine season 3 is kind of like...he has a lot of soul searching to do about his self destructive/suicidal tendencies and connection to the force and kanan really only makes it worse. i think a lot that pfeil would seek out the bendu and be like OKAY SO YOURE A GREAT AND WISE TEACHER. IM ALL FUCKED UP. HOW DO I STOP BEING FORCE SENSITIVE. and ofc the bendu is like Well you'd have to kill yourself (the living force is part of everyone, you can't not be alive unless you're dead, etc). and pfeil being pfeil takes this to mean "Ah, so i am morally obligated to kill myself then" which. Not what he said

the big battle at atollon is probably his nadir, really. i had been thinking he gets over his whole Thing before then but really his behavior ive written for it suggests he is in fact still up to his usual bullshit. snooping as usual i see. anyway. it is Terribly hopeless for the rebels so i imagine pfeil processes this as like "I can make a difference in the survival of the rebellion. By finally doing the moral thing and CRAZY DYING." and goes out there and fights like an insane scary reckless person until his ship does, in fact, get blown up.

i think this is where there are two sort of possibilities. either way he survives due to the horrible inside of him (dark side of the force). in an au where emet expy polydegmon is emperor, he gets scooped out of space and put in a bacta tank and shit, and there's an uncomfortable captor-captive romance thing that happens and whatever, i still haven't found a way to plot that out in my head to my satisfaction, i never like it. it's not interesting anyway.

the thing that i did this whole big long preamble for is that like. i started thinking "ok but what if i DIDNT replace palpatine with a cuntress. what would happen then." i don't think sheevy palps would scoop pfeil out of the space dirt, honestly. polydegmon initially wants to get in on that because he thinks his dark side echo bullshit might be useful and then falls in love with him and is like oh no oh fuck god dammit, but i think palpatine is too busy being palpatine to take much interest in pfeil, and beyond that i think he'd rather have pfeil be dead than potentially bring another apprentice into the stupid mix bc it's not like pfeil is as cool and badass in the force as luke or anything.

what i'm saying mostly is that i think it would be interesting if maybe in this timeline pfeil was stuck as a pfeilsicle out in space until like. idk. new republic times probably. fry from futurama ass situation

[disco-elysium-via-polls]

3. [Leave.]

Kim is waiting for us just here, out of the rain.

There's still lots of the coast to explore, but we have something *time-sensitive* to take care of first.

BACKYARD WALL - Just an ordinary wall. Nothing to see here.

[Conceptualization - Impossible 18] Why am I looking at this wall?

+2 In the dimming light, some things become clearer. +1 You have a keen aesthetic sensibility. +2 Cindy's artistic impulses are infectious.

CONCEPTUALIZATION [Impossible: Failure] - Yeah, why? It's a wall, an ordinary wall.

KIM KITSURAGI - The lieutenant sighs. "Why must we stop to look at this wall every time we pass by? We have business to attend to."

Damn, I really thought we had it that time.

Hard to see the details -- the colors, all warm and welcoming, are cozy though.

A flower trough where nothing really grows. Maybe in spring.

BOOK "A PRIMER FOR SMALL KIDS"

A textbook for the first grade in primary school. On the cover a humanoid bear is pushing a wheelbarrow full of letters; he's not doing a good job. The letter S is dangerously dangling from the cart, while E fell off a long time ago. Children should pay more attention!

>INTERACT

PRIMER BOOK - You hold in your hand the colourful primer. The title reads: "A Primer for Small Kids." There's a bear involved.

Exactly what I need!

Flip through the pages.

[Put the book away.]

PRIMER BOOK - Mhm. This book will show you the score; get you oriented with those basic concepts you appear to be hazy on. The anthropomorphic bear will give you the *low-down* of your life...

On what?

PRIMER BOOK - The alphabet.

2. Flip through the pages.

PRIMER BOOK - Every page has one word designating one letter of the alphabet, with a faded illustration -- most of them are scientific and cultural principles. It goes as follows...

Let's do this.

No time.

PRIMER BOOK - A is for Azimuth, B is for Boreas, C is for Cosign, D is for Diamat, E is for Ellips, F is for Flogiston, G is for Gamut.

Mmhm.

PRIMER BOOK - H is for Homeboy, I is for Iikon, J is for Jura, K is for Kollaps, L is for Laudanum, M is for Myriad, N is for Nadir, O is for Oreole, P is for Perihelion.

Yeah!

Nod stoically.

PRIMER BOOK - Q is for Quasar, R is for Rhododendron, S is for Sinus, T is for Tricoleur, U is for Ultra, V is for Vector, W is for Warheit, X is for Xylophone, Y is for Ystävä, Z is for Zenith.

That's it?

PRIMER BOOK - That's it. You know the alphabet now.

CONCEPTUALIZATION [Challenging: Success] - In what is called the IL -- the International Language, developed by scientists from Graad in the Twenties! Sinus means 'Sign', for example.

3. "Kim, I know the alphabet now."

KIM KITSURAGI - "Good. I also know the alphabet."

ESPRIT DE CORPS [Medium: Success] - It is a very useful skill to have, he thinks. For all sorts of life-activities. Like reading, and...

4. [Put the book away.]

These must be the drunks we heard about.

INLAND EMPIRE - You stop mid-step and put your hand on the garish necktie.

HORRIFIC NECKTIE - That bottle, *bratan*! Just look at that bottle!

Where? Bottle? What?

I really don't care about any bottle. I don't want to look at it.

Okay. Cool. What do I do next?

[Discard thought.]

ROSEMARY - In this drunk's hand -- on the pipe there. Glowing blue, a mysterious, otherworldly blue. Filled to the brim with holy mysteries!

ELECTROCHEMISTRY [Medium: Success] - It's hard to know what exactly your vivid interior is speaking of here, but I'm guessing it's got a lot of alcohol in it.

2. Okay. Cool. What do I do next?

HORRIFIC NECKTIE - Oh I think this is about so much *more* than cool. Please go talk to him. See what it's about. I'm *drawn* to it.

I'm going to ignore that for now and start from the left.

IDIOT DOOM SPIRAL - "Hey, Tequila!" A thirty-something man clad in a two-piece Lickra(TM) tracksuit puts down his pilsner and extends his hand in greeting.

"Good to see you! How's business? How's the whole *reality situation* treating you?"

Shake his hand.

Don't shake his hand.

IDIOT DOOM SPIRAL - "So what's happening?" He picks up his beer.

"Wait, Tequila?"

"Well, nice meeting you but I've got to go." [Leave.]

IDIOT DOOM SPIRAL - "Yeah, Tequila Sunset!" He takes a sip, "How are the, uhm, high-concept, reality-based adventures proceeding?"

INLAND EMPIRE [Easy: Success] - Good, these people know your *true* name. Looks like it has preceded you, Mr. Sunset. More on that later.

HORRIFIC NECKTIE - I like this guy. You should, too. He *respects* you by calling you your *true name*.