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vanteguccir · 9 days ago
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── ୨୧ ! STURNIOLO TRIPLETS GO TO EUROPE
matt sturniolo x reader
SUMMARY: Where Y/N, Matt's girlfriend, participates in the 'STURNIOLO TRIPLETS GO TO EUROPE VLOG' video.
WARNING: Super fluff.
REQUESTED?: Yes, by anon.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is MY idea and work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism, copy, or "inspiration"! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
   ༻✦༺  ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
The first-class cabin was nothing short of a dream. The softly lit hallway stretched ahead of them, lined with elegant partitions that gave each seat its own private cabin. Y/N walked just behind Matt, his hand warm and firm around hers as they walked the narrow aisle. Nick was leading the way, already peeking into his assigned space, while Chris trailed behind them.
When they finally stopped at their row, Y/N’s jaw dropped. She took a tentative step into her cabin, her eyes wide as she looked around at the plush leather seat that reclined into a bed, the medium lit up screen in front of it, and the small touches of luxury like the pillow and blanket tucked neatly on the side.
"This is amazing." She breathed, turning back to the boys with a grin so bright it could’ve lit up the plane.
Chris, peering into his own cabin a few steps away, nodded enthusiastically.
"This is insane. It feels like a movie."
Matt sent the softest gaze at Y/N's way after watching her reaction, his expression gentle and boyish as he nodded, his eyes sparkling. He felt like a proud boyfriend for being able to give that experience for his girlfriend.
"It really is, huh?" He muttered, receiving a soft laugh from Y/N, who took her backpack off her back and handed it to him.
"Here, baby." She said, motioning to the space above them. "Can you put this up there for me? Please."
Matt took the bag, glancing up at the overhead compartment with a slight frown. It wasn’t immediately obvious how to open it, and he hesitated, looking around for guidance. Nick, already settled into his cabin beside Matt’s and recording the entire interaction on his phone, tilted his head toward the compartment.
"Matt, up." Nick said as he pointed.
Matt squinted, his confusion deepening.
"Where?"
Nick let out an exaggerated sigh, still recording.
"In the thing! Hold the handle and lift it, Matt."
Matt gave him a glare before following his directions. He tugged the compartment open and slid Y/N’s bag inside, muttering something about Nick always being a know-it-all, earning a quiet laugh from Y/N.
Finally, with everything in place, Matt stepped into his own cabin. It didn't take long before the hum of the plane filled the air, preparing to take off soon.
Y/N - who had been watching TikTok while it was still up - threw her phone inside her purse and looked around while trying to get comfortable on her seat, but sighing in frustation when she was unsuccessful.
She returned her feet to the ground and curved her upper body so she could see the hallway, biting her lip as she peeked at Matt's cabin. He had already settled in, reclining in the single "bed" with his hoodie draped loosely over his shoulders.
He felt eyes on him and was quick to look up, catching her hesitant gaze, a soft smile growing on his face, already knowing what she wanted, gently patting the small space beside him.
"Come here, sweetheart." He murmured, scooting closer to the window to make room.
Without hesitation, Y/N got up and crossed the small hall that put a distance between them, climbing in his bed, squeezing into the limited space. It was a tight fit, but neither of them minded.
Matt pulled the blanket over them, wrapping it snugly around her before slipping an arm around her waist, holding her close. Her head nestled against his shoulder, her breath warm and comforting against the skin of his neck.
Reaching for his headphones, Matt placed them back around his head, music already filling his ears. He stretched his free arm, fingers hovering over several titles across the small TV screen before settling on one of Y/N’s favorites, a light, cozy movie he knew she adored.
He pressed play and felt her shift slightly, her gaze flickering toward the screen as the opening scene began. She hummed in approval, though her eyelids were already drooping. Within minutes, she succumbed to the exhaustion of their long day, her arm draped around his chest as she snuggled closer. Matt rested his cheek against the top of her head, his hand moving in slow, soothing circles over her arm, his hoodie’s soft fabric gliding against her skin.
For the first time since their frenetic day began, he felt himself relax.
He glanced toward the small window beside him, catching a glimpse of the night sky dotted with stars and the lights of the airport shining in the darkness. He hummed faintly, the moment feeling both surreal and comforting.
Suddenly, Matt caught movement out of the corner of his eye. Turning slightly, he saw Nick approaching their cabin with his phone out, clearly recording. Matt shot him a glare, silently warning him to keep quiet.
Nick stopped in his tracks, raising an eyebrow at his brother’s protectiveness. He panned the phone camera toward them briefly, whispering something to the device while capturing Y/N tucked into Matt’s side and the faint glow of the screen in front of them before backing away with a dramatic roll of his eyes.
Matt let out a breath of relief, tightening his hold on Y/N just a fraction as she shifted in her sleep, her fingers curling into his hoodie.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
The elevator doors slid open with a soft chime, revealing the quiet luxury of the hotel hallway. Y/N trailed by Matt's side, while Nick and Chris followed, their rolling suitcases rattling faintly on the polished floor. The flight from Boston had been long, and exhaustion clung to all of them, but the excitement of finally arriving at their destination had them buzzing with energy.
"Alright, room 111." Matt said confidently, stopping in front of the door. He placed the card against the magnetic circle above the handle, and the lock beeped, signaling it was unlocked. With a grin, he grabbed the handle and gave it a sharp pull.
Nothing happened.
He frowned, pulling again, harder this time, but the door didn’t budge.
Nick’s laughter echoed down the hall.
"It’s a push door, genius."
"Is it?" Matt muttered, frowning harder as he pulled once more, just to make sure.
Y/N rolled her eyes, stepping forward.
"Move, Matt." She said with a teasing sigh, nudging Matt gently to the side. She took the card from his hand, placing it again against the magnetic circle, and waited for the soft beep. With one fluid motion, she pushed the door open, revealing their room. Turning back, she shot Matt an amused, bored look. "It's not because we're in a different country that the way to open doors changed, honey."
Matt opened his mouth to reply, but Chris cut in with a laugh, clapping him on the shoulder.
"That’s tough, bro."
Y/N stepped inside first, and her breath hitched as she took in the sight before her. The room was a perfect blend of elegance and comfort, screaming Italian luxury.
To her front was a small white round table paired with two armchairs, a bouquet of vibrant green and white flowers arranged in a glass vase on top. Two letters sat neatly against it, each embossed with the Prada logo and addressed to both her and Matt. The sweet, rich aroma of the flowers filled the air, mingling with a faint hint of fresh linen and polished wood.
Directly to her left was an oval center table in marble, elegantly decorated with fancy chocolates, juicy fruits, and another small floral arrangement, the delicate blooms adding a pop of color to the space. Behind it sat a medium terracotta couch with two tall shelves on each side and a painting that seemed to be worth a lot.
Beyond that was the plush king-sized bed that seemed to be the most comfortable bed in the world, dressed in crisp white linens and framed by soft, warm lighting.
The tall windows occupying the whole largest wall were framed by heavy creamy curtains, slightly parted to reveal a hint of the garden below.
Y/N moved further into the room, running her fingers lightly along the wall as she absorbed every detail.
"This is..." She paused, unable to find the right word.
"Insane? Yeah." Chris finished for her, stepping in behind her with his backpack in his hands. "This is like... next-level fancy."
Nick whistled low, setting his backpack near the round table.
"This room smells expensive." He said, sniffing the air exaggeratedly.
Matt closed the door behind him, his earlier mishap forgotten as he put his backpack on the short hallway floor, meeting Y/N in the way and wrapping an arm around her waist, pulling her close.
"You like it?" He asked, his voice soft in her ear. She turned to look at him, her lips curving into a warm smile.
"I love it. Prada did amazing with this choice."
As the triplets wandered around, taking in the luxurious details and pointing out things to the phone Chris had whipped out, Y/N let herself enter the bathroom, pulling her skincare bag out of her purse to start organizing the main products across the sink.
Meanwhile, Matt was quick to throw himself on the plush king-sized bed, making sure to take out his shoes first - Y/N would kill him if he didn't, closing his eyes and feeling like he could fall asleep right away.
But he was quickly disturbed by a body crashing against his, his legs quickly pressing to his own chest in a way of protecting it while Nick jabbed his sides with fake punches, so soft that felt like he was tickling his skin.
"What the- get off me, Nick!" Matt yelled between fits of uncontrollable laughter, his voice muffled by his position.
Chris stood at the foot of the bed, phone in hand, recording the chaotic scene.
"This is gold." He said, laughing as Matt tried to wriggle free, his giggling echoing throughout the room.
Y/N emerged from the bathroom holding her, now, empty purse. She paused in the doorway, taking in the sight of the boys acting like overgrown kids. Rolling her eyes, she let out a small laugh and shook her head.
She was away for only 10 minutes.
"Boys." She said in a mock-scolding tone, her voice soft and affectionate. "Be careful, please." She walked past Chris, her lips quirking into a smile as she gave his phone camera a pointed glance.
The youngest triplet chuckled.
"Don't worry, they will survive."
Y/N moved to the small couch at the back of the room where Matt put her backpack, leaving the chaos to happen behind her back. She retrieved her phone and then turned to the center table, spotting the tray of fancy chocolates Prada had left for them.
Picking one up, she inhaled deeply, savoring the rich aroma of high-quality chocolate before taking a small bite of it, feeling the unique taste explode against her tongue.
"Good?" Chris called over, turning away from Nick and Matt after they finally stopped.
"Delicious." Y/N replied, her words muffled as she chewed.
She walked towards him while chewing, watching Nick and Matt get off the bed, her steps muffled by the carpet.
"Nick, get the real camera so I don't have to vlog on my phone anymore." Chris asked as soon as Nick got closer, lowering the device slightly.
Nick was quick to go to his backpack, taking the professional camera out of it. It didn't take long for him to turn it on, quickly spinning it around to make sure it was capturing the right angle.
Matt, who looked disheveled with his hoodie slightly wrinkled and his hair a chaotic mess after Nick's earlier wrestling match, stopped by Y/N's side, standing between her and Chris.
"Alright, this is Matt's and Y/N's room. They're in a different room than the one me and Chris are staying-"
"Cause' we’re special." Matt quipped, his tone dripping with mock superiority as he glanced at Chris with a playful smirk.
Chris rolled his eyes, leaning away from Matt slightly.
"Can you fix your hair?" He gestured at Matt’s wild hair, a grin tugging at his lips.
Matt immediately raised a hand to his head, running his fingers through the messy strands.
"My hair’s all messed up ‘cause I had a hood on during the plane, and then Nick decided to fucking kill me as soon as we got here." He shot a pointed look at Nick, who was laughing behind the camera. "I'm not trying to-"
"Okay, let me show you guys all the things in the room." Nick was quick to interrupt them, turning the camera toward the room to defuse the situation. "First of all, gorgeous..."
Meanwhile, Y/N was silent by their side, phone in hand, finishing up a text to both her and the triplets' parents to let them know they’d arrived at the hotel safely. With a small smile growing on her face after listening to the small fight starting between the brothers, she slid her phone into her back pocket.
"... and I'm so fucking hungry now." Chris kept talking, his tone sounding frustrated as Y/N walked closer to them, the sound of Nick's voice showing the details of the room to the camera echoing like background noise to her ears.
Without saying a word, she stood in front of Matt, her hands reaching up to his hair. Matt didn’t miss a beat, continuing his conversation with Chris about where they should eat later.
"We can maybe go somewhere close. I don’t feel like walking too far tonight." Matt said as Y/N gently smoothed down the mess on his head, her fingers combing through his hair with practiced ease.
"There. Now you don’t look like a trainwreck." Y/N smiled, stepping back to admire her work before patting Matt’s shoulder, stepping away to return to the back of the room, planning on getting another one of those wonderful chocolates.
"Thanks, babe." Matt said nonchalantly, flashing her a soft smile before turning back to Chris. "Okay, so what are the options?"
With another piece of chocolate in her hands, she wandered toward one of the tall windows at the far end of the room.
The elegant window door opened with a soft creak, and a gust of crisp winter air swept through the room, sending a slight chill up her spine. Y/N leaned against the frame, her gaze falling to the breathtaking garden below.
The perfectly trimmed hedges, circular topiary trees, and an array of greenery gave it a serene ambiance. Umbrella-covered tables and chairs were scattered around, surrounded by other buildings of the hotel.
"Wow." She murmured to herself, finishing the chocolate as she took in the sight. She turned her head slightly, calling out to the boys behind her. "Hey, guys, come look at this!"
Chris was the first to respond, bouncing across the room like an excited puppy, followed by Nick and Matt.
"What is it?" Nick asked as he reached her side, peering out over her shoulder.
"Look." Y/N said, gesturing to the garden below. "Isn't it beautiful?"
Chris opened the other half of the window, copying Y/N's position and looking below it.
"Can we go down there?" He asked as he squinted at the view.
"We have to figure it out." Nick affirmed, making sure the camera was recording the details.
Matt slid his arm around Y/N's waist, leaning over the window frame to get a better look. His cheek brushed against hers briefly as he turned his head, her hair tickling his skin.
"I'd love to go down there." He chimed in softly, his voice warm.
Y/N glanced at him, her smile widening at the way his eyes lit up as he looked down at all the green. He was living his dream, and she felt purely joy from it.
Her hand met his on her waist, intertwining their fingers against her covered skin, squeezing his hand lovingly.
"Can we go eat now?"
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
The restaurant was tucked away down a cobblestone street, just a short walk from the magnificent Duomo. The golden light spilling from the windows reflected off the polished wooden tables and pristine white tablecloths. The tantalizing scent of fresh pasta, basil, and garlic wafted through the air as waiters bustled around, balancing plates piled high with creamy sauces and twirling spaghetti.
At a corner table by the window, the four of them sat, barely holding it together after being awake for more than 24 hours. Nick slouched in his chair, lazily twirling his fork in a bowl of spaghetti, his eyelids drooping every few seconds. Chris leaned against the backrest with his elbows on the table, his mouth occasionally opening in a massive yawn between bites of fettuccine Alfredo. Matt, seated beside Y/N, kept absently running a hand through his messy hair, trying to stay awake while cutting into his lasagna.
Y/N, however, was the first to cave. The warm pasta in front of her - ravioli, creamy and rich - was absolutely delicious, but exhaustion was screaming inside her far more than hunger. She managed to eat only half before resting her fork on her plate with a soft sigh.
Matt glanced over at her, his brows pulling together in concern.
"You’re not eating more?" He asked, his voice soft but tinged with worry. "We barely ate today, honey."
Y/N shook her head wordlessly, too tired to explain that she simply couldn’t eat another bite. Instead, she shifted closer to him, tucking herself above his right biceps and resting her head on his shoulder. Her arms instinctively wrapped around his waist, squeezing him in a sleepy hug as she snuggled into his warmth.
Matt froze for a moment, holding his fork mid-air.
"Careful, sweetheart." He murmured, glancing down at her arms as they brushed the edge of his plate. "Don’t burn yourself on the lasagna." His voice was tender, and his free hand came up to lightly guide her arm away from danger.
"Hmm." Y/N hummed softly in acknowledgment, but her eyes were already closed. She didn’t seem to care much about the logistics of arm placement as she burrowed further into his side, her body practically melting against his.
The faint chuckle that escaped Matt’s lips was filled with affection as he returned to his food, though his movements were slower now, not wanting to disturb her.
"Wow." Nick muttered, his voice barely audible through his drowsiness. He leaned his chin on his palm and smirked at the sight of Y/N clinging to Matt like a koala. "She’s really comfortable, huh?"
"Looks like it." Chris added with a teasing grin, his hand subtly moving to grab his phone from the table. He couldn’t resist recording the scene in front of him; his brother’s flushed face, Y/N’s sleepy frame wrapped around Matt like he was her personal pillow, and Matt’s barely-there attempts to keep a straight face.
"Shut up." Matt muttered, rolling his eyes at his brothers while trying to keep his voice quiet enough. His head lowered slightly to press a soft, awkward kiss to the top of Y/N’s head, the angle slightly off because of her position, but the sweetness in the gesture made up for it.
Chris snickered quietly, his phone still recording as he whispered.
"Two years, and you’re still whipped, dude."
Matt didn’t even bother denying it. Instead, he simply adjusted his arm to hold her a little closer, his hand resting lightly on the right side of her thighs, bringing her legs closer. The movement was protective and tender.
"At least I’m not about to fall asleep in my pasta." He shot back softly, motioning toward Nick’s plate, where his fork was dangerously close to slipping from his fingers as he nodded off.
They continued eating in hushed tones, with Chris occasionally pausing to stifle his laughter at Nick falling asleep while chewing. Meanwhile, Y/N remained blissfully unaware of all of it, her breathing slowing as the sound of the boys’ voices blended into a soothing hum. She was vaguely aware of Matt’s hand moving to eat, but she trusted him to be careful enough not to burn or drop it on her.
When the waiter eventually came by to clear the plates, Matt stopped him, pointing to Y/N’s unfinished plate.
"Can we get this to go?" He asked softly, his voice still gentle as if not to wake her. The waiter nodded, and Matt gave him a thankful smile before returning his attention to her.
Chris finally pocketed his phone and leaned back in his chair, a grin plastered on his face.
"Well." He said quietly, looking between the three of them. "I guess this counts as a successful first dinner in Milan."
Matt hummed in agreement, pressing his cheek against Y/N’s hair, turning his focus back to his brothers.
"Are you going to meet Laura, Nick?" He asked, looking at the oldest triplet, who nodded while pressing his fingers to his eyes. "Okay, we can go wait for you at the Du... Duo... that bright building."
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
The patio in front of the Duomo was vast and bustling, even late at night. The trio stood at the edge of the square, far enough from the chaos of tourists to have a quiet moment while they waited for Nick.
The cold nipped at their faces, the chill of the Milanese night seeping through their jackets. Y/N was wrapped snugly in Matt’s arms, her cheek pressed against his chest as she tried to stay warm - or at least that’s what it looked like. In truth, she was barely awake, her head lolling slightly every now and then. Matt’s oversized jacket was draped over her shoulders on top of her own, cocooning her as she clung to him.
Matt squinted at Chris’s camera, his breath visible in the cold as he began.
"Alright, I’m not going to embarrass myself by trying to say the name of this building again, but me, Chris, and Y/N are enjoying it from afar."
Chris snorted from behind the camera, tilting it slightly to frame the scene better.
"Well, me and you." He corrected, his voice dripping with humor. "Because Y/N is sleeping standing up."
Matt couldn’t hold back his laugh, the sound rumbling in his chest and vibrating against Y/N’s cheek. He looked down at her, brushing a few stray strands of hair away from her face, his fingers gentle.
"She really is." He said with a grin, glancing at the camera again.
"I’m not!" Y/N protested weakly, her voice muffled as she buried herself further into Matt’s chest. She tried to lift her head to prove them wrong but only managed to half-open her eyes, her words slurring slightly. "I’m... I’m seeing the church. It’s beautiful."
Her attempt at defiance only made Matt and Chris laugh harder.
"Yeah, sure." Chris teased, zooming in slightly on her face before panning back to Matt.
"Guys, we just went out to eat." Matt started to the camera, still chuckling. "And we were literally all falling asleep at the table."
Chris spun the device to face himself, nodding vigorously.
"We were all so tired because we’ve been up for over 24 hours. Like, we were just fading away."
"The only thing that kept me alive..." Matt added as Chris turned the camera back to him. "Was the ice cream."
Y/N stirred slightly in his arms, her voice a soft mutter.
"And me."
Both brothers froze for a moment before bursting into laughter.
"Oh my God." Chris shook his head, barely keeping the camera steady. "Did you hear that? She said 'and me'."
Matt grinned down at her, his heart melting at the sight of her sleepy pout.
"You’re not wrong, tho." He said softly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "You do keep me alive."
Chris groaned jokingly, pretending to gag as he zoomed in on Matt’s face.
"Alright, let’s tone down the mushy stuff for the camera, you two. This is a vlog, you know?"
Matt rolled his eyes but couldn’t stop smiling. He tightened his grip on Y/N, letting her lean on him fully as her body relaxed even more against his. She was barely conscious at this point, her breaths slow and steady, but he didn’t mind. If anything, he was glad she felt comfortable enough to rest in his arms like this.
"Where’s Nick?" Chris asked after a moment, turning the camera to capture the Duomo behind them. "He’s been gone forever."
"He probably fell asleep somewhere." Matt joked, adjusting the jacket on Y/N’s shoulders.
They continued talking nonsense as the cold air swirled around them, Chris pointing out every biker that crossed their path, but Y/N didn’t stir again. She was too far gone, her exhaustion outweighing the chill of the night or the noise of the square. Matt kept her close, shielding her from the worst of the cold as they waited, his heart full despite the fatigue pulling at him.
When Nick finally returned, his steps hurried, and his face red from the chill, he found the trio exactly as he’d expected, glancing at Y/N with a small smile.
"Ready to go?" Nick asked after explanation about the guy who tried to make him buy roses for Laura.
"More than ready." Matt replied, his voice soft. He looked down at Y/N, brushing his fingers across her cheek to rouse her gently. "C’mon, sleepyhead. Time to get back to the hotel."
Y/N mumbled something incoherent, but her arms tightened around Matt’s waist as if to say she wasn’t ready to move. He laughed quietly, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he glanced at his brothers.
"Sweetheart, you have to wake up so we can go to our warm room and sleep in our bed, yeah?"
The camera was already trained on them as Matt talked Y/N out of her sleep softly.
"And this..." Chris said with a dramatic tone. "Is why Matt gets the boyfriend of the year award."
The screen cut off with the sound of their laughter echoing into the night, the cathedral standing tall behind them.
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
"... Goodnight Italy, goodnight moon, goodnight Prada-"
Nick, already giggling, interrupted with a laugh.
"Goodnight Prada is crazy." He said, shaking his head and pulling the covers up to his chin.
Chris, ignoring him, continued, his voice dripping with sleep as his words got a bit mixed up.
"Goodnight pasta, airport-"
Matt cut him off, too, straightening from his relaxed stance.
"Alright, I’m out. Say goodnight me, 'cause I’m leaving."
Chris stopped abruptly whatever he was trying to say, throwing an arm out from beneath the duvet as if reaching for him.
"No, no, no!" He protested, his voice filled with fake distress.
Nick rolled his eyes, his laughter subsiding into a fond grin.
"Let him go back to Y/N before she falls asleep in the shower or something." He teased, adjusting his pillow and settling more comfortably.
Chris groaned in defeat, sinking deeper into his blankets.
"Fine. But say goodnight to her." He said, pouting as Matt smirked and nodded.
"Will do." Matt replied, switching off the camera and leaving it at the marble oval table before slipping out the door. The hallway was quiet as Matt made his way to his room, his steps soft against the carpeted floor.
He pushed the door open softly, careful not to let it creak, stepping inside before closing it behind him, and was immediately greeted by the faint scent of Y/N’s lotion lingering in the air.
After walking through the short hallway that separated the entrance from the room itself, he paused in his tracks, the sight before him pulling a soft laugh from his lips.
Y/N was already tucked in bed, the duvet pulled up to her chin, leaving only her head peeking out. Her hair, still slightly damp from her shower, clung to her pillow in messy strands. Her eyes were closed, but her face twitched slightly, her brows furrowing at the sound of his laugh, as if she was caught between sleep and awake.
He shook his head fondly, leaning against the wall.
"You’re trying so hard, aren’t you?" He murmured quietly, a soft smile tugging at his lips.
The sound of his voice seemed to stir her. Her eyelids fluttered open, revealing her sleepy gaze, eyes slightly red from the tiredness. It took her a moment to focus on him, and when she did, a small, drowsy smile curved her lips.
"Hi, baby." She murmured, her voice thick with sleep. "You’re back."
Matt chuckled softly, stepping closer to the bed.
"Yeah." He said, crouching by her side. His hand reached out to brush a strand of hair from her face. "Chris said goodnight."
"Goodnight, Chris." She mumbled, her words slurred and barely audible, and her eyes began to drift closed again.
Matt’s chest ached with affection at the sight of her so vulnerable.
"Go to sleep, sweetheart." He whispered, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to her temple. "I’ll be there in a second. Just need to change."
She hummed in response, barely acknowledging his words as she nestled further into the duvet, her breathing evening out.
Matt moved quickly, changing into a pair of sweatpants and a soft shirt, all the while keeping his movements quiet. When he finally slid into bed beside her, the warmth of her body immediately drew him in. She stirred slightly, instinctively shifting closer to him, her head finding its place on his chest as her arm draped over his waist.
He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her snugly against him and adjusting the duvet to create a cocoon of warmth around them both. His lips found the top of her head, and he kissed it softly, lingering for a moment.
"I love you." He whispered against her hair, his voice barely audible in the stillness of the room, exhaling the comforting scent of fresh shampoo.
Y/N, her eyes still closed, raised her head slightly, her face tilting toward his. Her lips were pursed in a sleepy pout, and Matt couldn’t help but chuckle at how endearing she looked. He leaned down, meeting her lips in a lazy, intimate kiss. It was slow and messy, the sleep messing with their minds, but it was full of love.
Her head dropped back to his chest after pulling away, sighing softly.
"Thank you." She whispered.
Matt’s brow furrowed slightly as he looked down at her.
"For what?"
Her voice was soft and muffled against his shirt.
"For this. I’m only here because of you."
He shook his head, pressing another kiss to her hair.
"Even if Prada hadn’t invited us, I’d take you on a trip around all of Europe if you wanted to. Just say the word, baby."
Her lips curved into a small smile against his chest.
"I love you." She whispered.
"I love you more." He replied, his voice filled with certainty.
She hummed softly in response, her body relaxing completely against his as sleep overtook her. Matt stayed awake a little longer, his hand gently stroking her back as he watched her sleep, feeling like the luckiest man alive.
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finelinevogue · 6 months ago
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something in the orange
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summary - you are harry’s ex and you happen to rekindle at his sisters wedding
word count - ~2k
pairing - ex-boyfriend!harry x reader
🌞✨🌟🌞✨🌟🌞✨🌟🌞✨🌟🌞✨🌟🌞
It wasn’t a complete surprise that your ex-boyfriend was at his sisters wedding, but nonetheless you were still shocked to see him.
You had been friends with Gemma, your exes sister, way before you were dating her brother, Harry, which is probably the main and only reason you had been invited to her wedding.
Gemma and her family were still very nice towards you, even though you broke their Harry’s heart.
Well for the most part.
You had been sat on a table at the back of the reception room for the evening meal, with a couple of distant friends of the groom. You had been trying to make small talk as best you could, but your little introverted heart could only try so hard.
“Are you staying in Italy after the wedding?” You asked a man called Gordon who was sat next to you, with his girlfriend.
“No.”
He then went back to talking to his girlfriend.
You took a sip of your mocktail, glancing around the room to enjoy the happiness of others.
Gemma was happily chatting with Michal, her now husband, whilst Anne, Gemma’s mum, was arguing with one of the chefs that the cake had to be ready in ten minutes. It was quite funny to watch Anne get angry, considering she’s the loveliest person on the planet.
You noticed Harry, of course you did.
He hadn’t looked your way once, or if he had he’d been so discreet about it that he was making you feel invisible.
You didn’t blame him for keeping his distance, after all you had broken his heart. It was a surprise you had even been invited, but friends first and all that.
He looked good.
He looked better than good, he looked ridiculously pretty.
Harry was dressed in a black tuxedo with a bow tie that had now been untucked and was loosely hanging around his neck. He looked tanned and well. He looked happy, you thought.
You turned to a girl next to you and tried to start conversation with her.
“How are you enjoying the Amalfi Coast?” You smiled.
“It’s nice.” She smiled back before turning to speak to whoever was next you.
It wasn’t particularly nice having the people on your table kind of ignore you, but then again they didn’t know you and had no reason to get to know you.
You ate your meal in silence as you simple people watched.
It was nice seeing familiar faces, even if yours was one they’d rather not see.
Once you had finished, people had started to get up to go and dance on the little dance floor on the terrace. It was laden with fairy lights strung high above, along with an abundance of citronella candles that casted a warm orange glow over the area.
You watched as some couples slow danced. A little girl had a dance competition with her dad. Gemma and Michal busted whatever shapes they were doing.
“Have you finished, ma’am?” A waiter asked you, breaking you away from watching the evening continue without you.
“Oh yes. Thank you, it was really lovely.”
“Our pleasure.” They smiled at you, before cleaning up.
You fiddled with your fingers as you watched more and more people get up on the dance floor to enjoy their evening.
You pushed your chair back then, deciding to go to the toilet before you made the decision whether or not to join people out on the terrace.
The wedding location was gorgeous.
A beautiful historical hotel, overrun with flowers cascading down the stone walls, that was built into the cliffside along the Amalfi Coast.
It was no surprise that the wedding was here, considering Gemma and Harry called Southern Italy their second home. Harry had taken you to his house in Maiori multiple times when you had been together and you completely understood why he loved this area.
You missed going to that house. The crazy adventures you’d get up to.
You missed Harry.
You locked yourself in a cubicle before you could make yourself upset over it.
You’d just finished up when you heard some people walk in.
“Did you see Y/Ns here?” They said, but you couldn’t work out who they were - at least it wasn’t someone you recognised.
“Yeah. Wonder why.” You didn’t recognise the second persons voice either.
“Fucking ballsy if you ask me.” They both laughed. “If I’d cheated on my best-friends brother and still been invited to her wedding, I wouldn’t go.”
“Did Y/N cheat on Harry? I heard that she had a mental breakdown when he stopped buying stuff for her and stopped taking her on expensive holidays.”
You sat down on the toilet lid, not finding the courage to go out there and speak up for yourself.
“No. Pretty sure she cheated. Doesn’t surprise me though, she always was a little bit… different.”
“You mean, not model worthy?!” They both laughed again.
You carefully and silently ripped off some toilet paper before using it to dab the tears that were falling from your eyes and down your cheeks.
It was tough, trying to not take things to heart but you were a sensitive person. This didn’t make you a bad person, in fact it just meant that you carried extra love around with you.
It hurt when other people couldn’t see that when you tried to live with your heart on your sleeve as much as you could.
“God… Wonder why she came?”
“Probably to prove that she’s not the bitch everyone thinks she is.”
“Yeah.”
“Harry hasn’t even spoken to her.”
“Weren’t they together for like five years.”
6 years and 3 months, you thought to yourself.
Best 6 years and 3 months of your life.
“Something like that.”
“Poor Harry.”
“Yeah. Must’ve been rough for him.”
“Means he is single though.”
“Wonder whether he’s ready to mingle.” They both laughed again, before leaving the toilets discussing their plan to make Harry see them.
You finished dabbing your eyes free of tears, breathing out a heavy breath before standing up and heading to the sinks to freshen up.
You patted your cheeks with water to cool you down and looked at yourself in the mirror with a smile.
You are okay. You thought to yourself. You know what they said isn’t true. You are a good person.
Once you’d collected yourself, you left the bathroom.
If you headed right you would find yourself back in the main room heading towards the terrace, but it you went left it would lead you to some stone steps carved into the cliff wall that lead down to a private beach.
Of course you headed left.
The night sky was burning a deep orange from where the sun was setting. You couldn’t wait for the stars. Stargazing had always been yours and Harry’s favourite pastime - it grounded you whilst simultaneously reminding you how grateful that you’d found each other in all of this.
The stairs were easy to walk down, even in wedge sandals.
It took you a good fifteen minutes to climb down, but the second your toes felt the cooling sand you knew it had been worth it. Would it be worth the climb back up? Hmm…
You crossed the beach, smiling when you realised you were the only one down here in this small alcove of a beach.
The waves moved in slowly, making that euphoric crashing sound as they folded over and onto the sand.
The water was turning a darker blue under the setting sun, but you knew in the daytime it would be a crystal clear blue - perfect for swimming or snorkelling.
You sat on the beach, toeing off your sandals and resting them beside you.
You pulled your knees up to your chin, hugging your arms around your legs as you sat and watched the waves crash again and again. There was something so therapeutic about it.
As you watched on you couldn’t help but think back to the conversation those girls were having in the toilet.
You didn’t realise what people thought about you being your back. It stung to think people were thinking such horrible things.
The moment your eyes started watering again you knew that what they’d been saying about you hadn’t really registered until now - in the quiet on your own. It hadn’t fully clicked that everyone now perceived you as this horrible, bitch of a woman that broke the heart of a man who is loved by millions.
You sniffled, looking up at the sky to hold back the onrush of any more tears.
“Here.”
“Holy fucking….” You scrambled from where you were sitting and jumped up to find Harry standing beside you, “Harry… My…”
You put your hand over your heart, having been scared shitless from him unintentionally creeping up on you.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you jump.”
You then realised he was still holding out his handkerchief for you - the one you thought had been pretend from his suit pocket.
“It’s okay, thank you.” You took this handkerchief and wiped under your eyes with it, dabbing your nose too. “I didn’t realise you were down here, sorry. I’ll leave.”
You bent down to pick up your shoes, but were stopped when Harry gently bent his wrist around yours.
“Please don’t.”
You felt like you had stopped breathing.
Harry’s soft touch against your skin nearly made your heart cave inside your chest. You felt like time had stopped, but you wouldn’t care if you only ever got to see Harry in this moment, in this frame, for ever and ever.
The way the setting sun casted a golden hew against his skin made him prettier than anyone Michelangelo could sculpt. His eyes were just as green and perfect as always, if only with a little extra sadness spreading at the corners.
And those lips.
Well you only wished they were still yours to kiss.
“I don’t…” You started, not moving your hand away from his. “You don’t want me here.” You whispered, tucking your head down.
You missed the way he shook his head softly, furrowing his eyebrows with frustration.
Harry stepped closer to you, making you apprehensively look up again. He was so pretty.
“Stop.”
“Stop what?”
“Stop thinking I don’t want you around. Stop thinking that I never want to see you again. Stop believing that you have done something wrong. Stop thinking that you aren’t still the most important person in my life.” Harry’s eyes were now tearing up.
You shook your head, pulling your hand from his carefully.
“I.. I can’t.. sorry.”
“Y/N…”
You were about to run across the beach, away from Harry when his call stopped you.
“Y/N, no.”
Your feet froze and you turned around slowly to see him standing in place, ever so slightly shaking his head.
“Just no.” He said.
“I… I don’t understand.” You said.
“The last time you ran away, I let you.” Harry said, as you tried to refrain from thinking back to the last time it had been like this.
“I know.”
“Well, I’m not about to make that mistake again.”
Your eyebrows furrowed at that, bottom lip pouting which Harry always used to tease you about.
You stood still, your breath catching when he started moving towards you. You couldn’t move. You were frozen to the spot, like some force of nature wasn’t allowing you to move.
“The last time I let you walk out of my life was the biggest mistake I ever made. I should’ve tried harder - I should’ve begged you to stay, God knows I wanted you to.”
“Harry, please don’t say things you don’t mean…”
“What don’t you get, Y/N/N?” Harry stopped short of you, confused about how you couldn’t quite grasp what he was trying to tell you.
“You don’t want me to stay.”
“What—.”
“You don’t need me to stay.”
“Y/N…”
“No, H, listen to me.” You confidently took a step forwards towards him, still leaving a good enough space between you. “I can’t put you through another breakup like that again.. I… I don’t even think either of us have properly gotten over the last one. I meant what I said and did last time and I still mean it now.”
“Well fuck that. You don’t get to say things like that.”
“Harry…”
“No. Fuck!” Harry shouted, combing a hand through his hair like he did when he was stressed. “Do you understand how much you hurt me?”
You weren’t expecting him to ask you that, so you took a tiny step back in shock. You bravely answered, “Yes.”
“And do you know why?” His eyes were watering now.
“Yes.”
“So tell me.”
“Har—.”
“Just.. humour me and tell me.”
“You were hurt because I broke up with you. You were hurt because I gave up on over six years. You were hurt because I was cruel.”
Your voice was shaky but you stood strong, not wanting to guilt trip Harry into feeling sorry for you.
“No.” He replied. “No. I was hurt because the woman I love, the woman I was only weeks away from getting down on one knee for, broke up with me because she decided she wasn’t worth me loving. Not that she didn’t love me anymore, no, but because she felt unworthy of my love.”
Your eyes started free flowing with tears then as you stood and listened to him speak. Everything he was saying was true but it didn’t make it any more comfortable to hear back.
“I was hurt because I thought we could talk about things like that before the progressed into something we could never come back from. I was hurt because you chose to listen to all the sick and twisted voiced in your head, rather than the one voice that actually mattered; mine. I was hurt because you didn’t communicate. I had to find out from my sister that you were being abused online by, not only my fans, but close girl friends of mine over their jealousy. And I had to find out from my mum that yours had passed away a few weeks before you broke up with me.”
You let out a sob then, everything crashing around in your mind. Too many thoughts and too little left of you to put them all back together.
“Y/N, love, I was hurt because I was there for you when you didn’t believe I could be.”
“I’m sorry.” You sobbed out before your knees gave way and you dropped onto the beach beneath you, crying your what was left of your heart out.
Everything from your breakup, to the hate and losing your mum, the grief had all been collecting inside of your head and it was only now that you felt safe enough to let it all go.
You caved in on yourself, cupping your hands over your face.
It only took a couple of seconds for Harry to collapse onto the floor beside you, scooping your body up in his arms so he could pull you close into his chest. Your chest heaved as you cried, and you could only just hear Harry calming you down with a few ‘sshh’ and the occasional kiss to your forehead.
You kept repeating ‘I’m sorry’ over and over again, not really knowing who you were apologising to.
Harry? Your mum? Yourself?
“Sshh. You’re okay. I’ve got you. You’re safe.” Harry kept repeating in between your apologies.
You let Harry hold you for what felt like hours, but was actually only five minutes, before you had calmed yourself down and you could breathe again.
You emerged from Harry’s hold and gave him a weak smile.
“Probably look like a right state after crying.” You laughed at yourself.
Harry cupped your cheek with his hand and softly ran his thumb there. “Still as pretty as the day I met you.”
“H, you met me when we were less than a year old. You don’t remember that.” You stifled a laugh.
“I don’t remember much, but I remember you.”
You dipped your head with a blush as he said that, his words still having that charming effect on you.
Harry dropped his hand from your cheek, but you were quick to hold it again with yours. You threaded your fingers through his and gave a tight squeeze. He squeezed back.
“I am really sorry, Harry.”
“I know.”
“I have a lot to be sorry for and I’ll find the strength to write you a list of them all one day.” You promised.
“Maybe we can write them together? Perhaps in a couples therapy?”
Your head shot up to meet his at the hearing of the word ‘couples’.
“You want…”
“I want you to be mine again. I may be selfish but screw it, I’m taking this chance to ask you whether, with the right help maybe, we could become us again?”
“Are you sure?” You moved closer to him, knees touching knees.
Here on this little beach, tucked away from the crowds of the party and the rest of the world you felt everything was right again. Almost like a haze had been lifted and you could see clearer now more than even what you wanted - who you wanted.
“Trust me.”
“I do. I promise, I do.”
“Maybe it’ll take some time, but I promise to be there for you, always, and take care of you like I promised your mum all those years ago.”
“You’ve always taken care of me, H. My mum would be proud of you.”
“Like she’s proud of you, too.”
“Don’t make me cry again.” You whispered, eyes locked on his so you could focus on something else other than the tears that wanted to spill.
“So was that a yes? Do you want to try again?”
“Ask me properly.” You leaned closer.
“Y/N L/N.” He said with a smirk.
“Yes.”
“Will you be my girlfriend… again?”
You burst out laughing over that, dropping your head onto his shoulder to hide your blushing face from his.
You smiled to yourself before answering.
“Yes,” You kissed his neck before sitting back up again, “Yes, yes, yes.”
And with the smile on Harry’s face as you gave him your answer you knew that you would be alright this time.
There was just something in the orange of that burning Italian sunset that told you, you and Harry were far from done. In fact, you’d only just started.
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coffebuns · 6 months ago
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girugamesh!
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spyboy2000 · 28 days ago
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ᴍᴀʀɪᴏ ᴄᴀᴛᴛᴀɴᴇᴏ Jukebox 1958
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slytherin-princess-x · 1 month ago
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Why aren’t we more
Angst, ends up with fluff
Theodore nott x reader
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I stared at Theo, my heart pounding in my chest. The tension in the air was palpable, charged with unresolved anger and something else, something I’d been trying to ignore. We were supposed to be studying for their Potions exam, a last-minute review that had turned into a heated argument over some trivial comment he had made about my study habits. But then, in a moment of sheer madness, he had kissed me—softly at first, and then with a desperation that had taken her completely by surprise.
Now, my lips buzzed with the remnants of that unexpected kiss, and the anger I felt was mixed with a confusing sense of betrayal, a feeling that I didn't want to confront. I crossed her arms tightly across her chest, trying to create a barrier between them.
“If you do that again, I’ll throw you out the fucking window, you—what are you doing?” My voice came out sharper than I intended, but I couldn’t help it. The audacity of him after everything felt unbearable.
Theodore stood there, a lopsided grin on his face, as if the kiss had only deepened the amusement in his grey eyes. He stepped back slightly and looked toward the window, which was barely a crack open, allowing a slight breeze to flutter through the curtains.
“Checking how high the drop is, see if it’s worth it,” he replied, his tone light and teasing, as though he was discussing the merits of a new broomstick rather than the risk of him being thrown out of a three-story window.
I couldn’t help but just stare at him, mouth agape, unsure whether to be infuriated or intrigued. “You think this is a joke?” I snapped, feeling a heat rise to my cheeks. “You kiss me in the middle of an argument, and you act like you’re going to just shrug it off?”
Theodore’s grin faded slightly, but his gaze remained fixed on her. “I didn’t mean to make you upset. I thought... I thought it might clear the air, you know?”
“Clear the air?” I repeated incredulously, my heart racing at the idea that he thought a kiss could somehow fix everything. “You can’t just kiss someone because you feel like it and expect it to make things better. That’s not how this works!”
He raised an eyebrow, stepping closer again. “Isn’t it? I mean, there’s definitely a tension between us, and you can’t tell me you didn’t feel something just now.”
I opened her mouth to respond, but hesitated. It was true; maybe I had felt something. The kiss had ignited a spark inside me, one I had been trying to snuff out ever since we met. Our bickering, our banter, all the moments of shared laughter and late-night conversations had woven a complicated tapestry of emotions that neither of us wanted to confront.
“You think I want to feel this way?” I asked, exasperated, trying to maintain some semblance of control over the situation. “You think I wanted this to happen? You and I are—”
“Complicated,” he interrupted, his voice suddenly serious. “Yeah, I get that. But I can’t pretend I don’t want you. I can’t just ignore the fact that I kissed you because I’ve wanted to for ages.”
My heart raced, caught between disbelief and a thrill I couldn’t quite suppress. “Theodore,” I started, trying to keep my voice steady. “You can’t just say that and think it’ll make everything okay. We have a friendship—”
“Do we?” He leaned closer, his eyes boring into mine, and for a moment, making me forget everything else. The tension between us crackled like electricity. “Or is it just this façade we keep up to avoid acknowledging what’s right in front of us?”
“Do we?” He leaned closer, his eyes boring into hers, and for a moment, Y/N forgot everything else. The tension between them crackled like electricity. “Or is it just this façade we keep up to avoid acknowledging what’s right in front of us?”
I opened her mouth again to respond, but no words came. Instead, I felt a deep, unsettling truth settling in my stomach: he was right. The friendship we had built was layered with unspoken words and what-ifs that hovered between us like an unsheathed sword.
“Listen,” I said finally, taking a step back to put distance between us. “I don’t know what this is—what you want—but throwing ourselves into something without thinking isn’t the answer either.”
He let out a small, frustrated huff, running a hand through his dark hair. “I’m not asking for us to jump into anything. I just... I want to know if there’s something here to explore. I don’t want to just be friends anymore.”
I looked away, trying to process the weight of his confession. The last thing I wanted was to ruin our friendship, yet the longing that swirled within me was undeniable. I could feel the heat of his gaze, the way it tugged at my resolve.
“Are you really willing to risk our friendship for a chance at something more?” My voice barely above a whisper.
“Maybe,” he said, his voice steady. “Maybe it’s worth the risk.”
The vulnerability in his eyes caught me off guard, and I felt my heart flutter in my chest. Could I take that leap? Was it really worth the risk of losing everything we had?
“Just promise me something,” I meet his gaze. “If we do this, we do it together. No half-measures.”
Theodore stepped closer, a smile breaking across his face that lit up his features. “Deal.”
And in that moment, I felt the walls I had built around my heart begin to crumble. The drop outside didn’t seem so frightening anymore. Instead, it felt like the start of something new, something worth the leap.
Taglist: @yootvi @redeemingvillains @littlemadamred @smut-anarchy
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0nlythrowharrybeaux · 8 months ago
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Magnetic Part 2^**
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A continuation of this fic where Harry cheats on his gf with Y/N and is basically pussy whipped.
Warnings: mentions of infidelity, heart break/break up, arguments/confrontations, mentions of alcohol & marijuana use, oral (f & m receiving) sex, unprotected sex, light dom/sub dynamic, light breeding kink, light pain kink, fingering, use of sex toy, daddy kink, forced orgasms.
WC:22K
HARRY’S POV
Things had been extremely quiet between Harry and his girlfriend since they got in the line for the valet and now well into the drive home. She was clearly upset at him, she was actively ignoring him when he’d glance over. But he was also a little bit frustrated with her for her attitude throughout the night. He was also annoyed that she tried to insinuate that you needed your uncle to find work, he had no idea where that had even come from! And while he had initially just thought about leaving it, the more he sat in silence with her, he needed to say something but he wasn’t sure how to bring it up without making her more upset at him. And as they got closer and closer to his house, he felt his emotions just forming a lump in his throat. He needed to say something.
“Babe.” He mumbled.
He waited a few seconds too long before he heard her respond, “Hm?” As she glanced up from her phone.
“You know I love you, right?” He asked and she nodded, “Which means I owe it to you to be honest with you.” He said and she straightened up.
“Yeah.” She confirmed. Harry licked over his lips and she swallowed the lump in her throat as she waited for him to keep talking, mentally preparing to hear the worst thing.
“I just…I can’t believe you tonight.” He sighed in disappointment, “I mean, what the fuck has gotten into you? You were so rude to Y/N!” He reprimanded her. She scoffed in disbelief.
“You can’t believe me?! I can’t believe you!” She raised her voice hand in the air as she gesticulated her frustration, “You have the hots for her!” She accused and he scoffed.
“I do not!”
“You were eye-fucking her all night, Harry!” She accused.
“All night?! We barely had a chat with them!” He shouted back as he turned to her, taking advantage of the red light. Her scowl melted into a dejected frown.
“All. Night. Harry.” She said emphatically. He could see the sadness in her eyes, it made his stomach turn.
He sighed and shrugged in defeat, “So what? She’s…she’s beautiful, I can’t…observe that?” He asked.
“You have a crush her.” She said and he frowned and immediately shook his head, denying her claim.
“No, I don’t!” He rebutted. 
“How do you know all those things about her, then?”
“We’re friends!” He exclaimed and just held her gaze for several seconds. “We’re friends.” He repeated.
“Light’s green.” She mumbled before turning away and Harry sighed and turned back to the road and took off. It grew silent again and he realized that he was feeling rather anxious about her finding out about him sleeping with you. He didn’t want her to find out. God, just seeing the hurt in her eyes now had him feeling completely gutted. He couldn’t do this to her and if it scared him then that was maybe a sign that he didn’t want to lose her, right?
“Babe.” He mumbled again.
“What?” 
“I’m sorry.” He apologized, “I did…look upon her lustfully.” He mumbled with a small smile and she turned towards him again. Harry glanced over quickly and was relieved to see her smile at him before he turned back to the road. 
“That’s all I wanted. For you to admit it.” She said.
“Okay, I admit it.” He said again, “It’s been a while since we’ve seen each other, s’all.”
“Have you…been with her before?” She asked next and he sighed. “Before us?”
“Yes.” He responded and she clenched her jaw momentarily before exhaling.
“Okay.” She mumbled lowly, “It was the past.” She said to not let it get to her and he nodded.
“Exactly.” He reiterated. She then reached over for his hand and he let her grab it. 
“I know she’s your friend but I don’t like her.” She decided and he nodded.
“That’s…fine, you don’t have to.” He chuckled a bit and she smiled upon hearing him say that. It was quite a relief to her that he didn’t expect her to get along with you, it made her feel like he was in her corner, which she really needed after feeling so insecure tonight.
“I love you.” She said to him.
“Love you.” Harry smiled.
****************
As soon as you got home after dropping Ian off, you scurried up to your room and stripped down and headed to your lingerie drawer; you wanted to dress up for Harry. You had lots of lingerie, not because you used it a lot but because sometimes you just liked to feel sexy and you’d wear it under outfits when you were feeling less than confident before a gig or project or around the house while doing mundane things like hoovering or watching TV; it was mainly for you. As you browsed through your options you landed on a black lace bustier. You grabbed that and got it on before digging around for the bottoms. When you located the basically sheer thong that went with the top, you slid it up your legs and set it into place. You then made your way over to your hair accessories drawer and pulled out a big chiffon bow clip. You did a tousled half up-half down sort of thing, taking advantage of your loose curls. You then touched up your make up and got on some lotion and perfume before jumping into bed. 
You knew he’d be a while so you started to watch a movie, but when it ended and he still wasn’t here you got a bit worried. You checked your phone and didn’t see anything from him. Maybe he was handling something with his girlfriend? Regardless, you waited around a little bit more, but when it hit 2am you knew he wasn’t going to come. You were definitely disappointed, but more worried than anything because he would’ve at least warned you. You didn’t want to text him in case his girlfriend saw, so you just got through your nighttime routine before putting on another movie to help lull you to sleep. After staring at the TV for about 20 minutes you sighed and just reached for your phone and opened a text to him.
Hey, I hope everything’s alright. 
You hit send without giving it too much thought and then a second later the bottom of your screen read “Not Delivered”. You instantly felt a lump form in your throat and then bit down on the inside of your cheek to localize the pain that would just pang throughout your entire body otherwise. You felt hollow from one moment to the next, so much so that it made you nauseous and you sat and just inhaled deeply before slowly releasing out your breath as your eyes started to well up. Your throat was burning as you tried to hold back the urge to cry. 
“Get it together, bitch, s’not even your man.” you mumbled to yourself before laying back down. You grabbed your phone again and just deleted your messaging feed with Harry. He had made his choice and you were left on the outside. But it was for the best. It was.
The following morning you felt more calm about it, of course you were sad, but it was good that he decided to focus on his relationship. Either way, your feelings for him were getting a little too strong, so it was far better this way. You didn’t know what led to him blocking your number, but you were glad he had, it gave you a sense of closure. As much as you wanted to be upset about it you had no right to be. And it’s not like you could talk to one of your friends about it without brining shame to yourself and to Harry. You knew that they wouldn’t judge you or be assholes about it, things happen! But admitting that you kept accepting his advances is what you were ashamed of. You didn’t feel too guilty about it until now, when you realized that you had no one to talk to about this because it was embarrassing to have gotten to this point. You just needed to move on and also, you owed Ian an explanation.
*****************
Harry was feeling a hollowness in his chest and some guilt for standing you up and surely disappointing you in the process. He cared for you and he liked you a lot but he had a girlfriend and he did care for her. Yeah, things could be better in some areas but no relationship was perfect, so he needed to stop expecting a perfect match in every aspect of the relationship. It just wasn’t realistic to expect that and he had to appreciate what he already had. To some maybe this sounded like he was settling, but he didn’t think so. He was doing the mature thing and honoring the commitment he made to someone else. This was the right thing to do, especially upon realizing that if he didn’t stop it now, he had no idea when or if he could down the line. It actually kind of terrified him because he didn’t even know if you liked him in the same way he liked you. You were so good at compartmentalizing in this area, and he could too if he tried, but he liked you too much to do that.
He swallowed down the knot that formed in his throat, “Fuck…” he mumbled as he stared up at the ceiling, suddenly being overcome by what he could only describe as grief. Why did it feel like that?
“Harry?” He heard in the distance, “Harry, what’s wrong?” His girlfriend asked as she stopped moving over him. He suddenly snapped back to reality, realizing that he had been so in his head that he’d forgotten he was in the middle of sex with her. He dug his elbows into the mattress to help him sit up and then he grabbed her hip.
“I want to stop.” He mumbled and she frowned, looking perplexed and hurt at his sudden shift in mood.
“Are you sure?” She asked, “I mean, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I just don’t feel too good.” He grumbled and she slowly clambered off of his body.
“Can I get you anything?” She asked him and he shook his head.
“No, I’m just gonna have a shower. That should help.” He said and she nodded as he wordlessly got up and into the shower.
When he emerged from his shower he did feel a bit better, the anxiety of the choice he’d made had minimized enough that he could sit comfortably with it again. He had to stick to his guns not just for the sake of his relationship but for yours too. You didn’t deserve this, just pieces of someone’s attention and affection, you deserved someone’s whole heart. Thinking back on it now, asking you to tell him that you’d wait for him was the most selfish and cruel thing he had done to another person. It made his stomach sink once again and he felt this awful pang of hurt strike him right in the heart before radiating out to his fingertips.
“H?” He heard some taps on the door.
“Yeah?”
“Do you want some oatmeal with berries?”
“Sure.” He called back before looking up into the mirror again and sighing. He had made the right decision…it didn’t feel like it right now, but with time it could- no, it would, get better. He had to believe that.
…. ONE MONTH LATER ….
You were a little bit nervous as you were getting your dress on to go meet Ian. After the Harry thing, you came clean to him as to why you had abruptly ended your evening and Ian was hurt. He felt that you had connected really well and was looking forward to getting some alone time with you and so he was very disappointed to hear that. You then said that you actually did want to see him and he felt like you were just rebounding him and when you assured him you were not, he asked you to give him some time to figure out if he wanted to continue seeing you again and you agreed. He had reached out to you earlier in the week and asked to see you and you quickly agreed. You were actually looking forward to it and hoped that he’d give you another chance because you truly had a wonderful time with him and could see yourself starting to like him if you got to know him a little better. You were getting close to the bar he had told you to go to and kept an eye out for him up front and finally you saw him as your driver slowed down.
“Here we are, miss.” The older gentleman smiled.
“Thank you. Here you are.” You said handing him some cash, “I don’t need change.” You assured him and he thanked you before you opened up the door. Seconds later Ian was at the door, extending his arm for support as you climbed out.
“Hey, you look lovely.” Ian greeted you and quickly kissed your cheek and you did the same before pulling back.
“Thanks. You look great too!” You smiled as you looked him up and down before looking into his eyes again. He was quite a sharp dresser, you were impressed with his personal style. 
“What?” He sniggered.
“Nothing…” you smiled, “I’m glad you called.” You said with a small shrug and he smiled.
“C’mon, lets get inside.” He suggested and you nodded and followed behind him. 
You had a drink while you caught up over what you’d each been up to over the last few weeks and just as you recalled, he was charming, funny, smart…this man was a full fledged dream and you were willing to give him an honest shot. After you got another drink in you, you were well on your way to buzzed and were practically giggling at everything he was saying so you decided to share some spicy tuna on crispy rice boat things that just happened to hit the spot.
“Wow, those were phenomenal. Great suggestion.” You hummed as you carefully wiped around your mouth incase you had smeared your lipstick.
“Glad you liked it.” He smiled. “So…”
“So.” You responded with a playful smile as you looked up at him through your eyelashes.
“Obviously I…am attracted to you. I like you.” He said a bit timidly, breaking eye contact as he spoke the words, but then looking back at you.
“I like you too.” You assured him when he looked back into your eyes. You needed him to know that you meant it. Being vulnerable was a very hard thing for you but when it came to people’s feelings the least you could do was reciprocate it. It often made you feel a little bit foreign in yourself but the relief and pride you felt in yourself that came afterwards as a result of your candor did a great job of washing out any negative feelings.
“Ummm…I…I was engaged just a few months ago and we ended it because she cheated on me with her best friend.” He explained and your smile immediately disappeared and a frown took its place.
“Ian, I’m so sorry-”
“It’s fine.” He shook his head, “Well, it’s not fine, but I’m starting to be fine, I think.” He explained and you nodded. “But ummm…I’m not as ready to date as I thought I was. I think when I agreed to go to your aunt’s thing I mean…I just needed a night of fun. I wanted to get my mind off of things and it was great!” He added and you nodded, “But I’m not ready to continue seeing you as more than friends.” He explained and you felt like the bubble of your buzz had been burst as your throat suddenly felt like it was closing up.
“I get it.” You smiled softly. “And I continue to feel awful about being so abrupt to end our night out after how much fun we had-”
“Don’t be. I think if we had gone back to yours or mine I would’ve like cried during sex or something.” He chuckled with a little bit of embarrassment.
“Yikes…” you hissed jokingly, in an attempt to lighten the mood and he laughed, which you were glad he did. “I’m kidding, I mean…it happens.” You shrugged.
“I suppose.” He smiled and was more than grateful that you were taking this all in stride. “I think I’m also a little bit…scared of you.” He added and your brows furrowed in concern.
“W-why?” You asked cautiously and then regretted asking. Maybe you didn’t want the answer anymore.
“Like I love that you were so honest about what happened, I genuinely appreciate that! But the fact that you just have men at your disposal like that…it just…kind of made me feel…unsafe.” He said and your frown deepened, “Which was such a contrast from how things felt at the party so it was like an emotional whiplash for me. And this is not to say you’re in the wrong for this! You have every right to do as you please, you’re a smart, beautiful, and fun single person, you know? That’s not…like I’m not trying to shame you for what you do in your own time, it’s me. Like…I don’t know how to not feel…upset by it?”
“It’s still fresh, what you’ve been through with your ex-fiancé.” You clarified and he nodded.
“Yeah, I think that’s the main issue here. Clearly I’m not emotionally or psychologically prepared for anything with anyone right now. Sorry.” He apologized sincerely and you smiled and shook your head.
“I understand, Ian. There’s no need to be sorry.” You assured him, “If anything, I’m even more sorry for making you feel that way! It was a super shitty thing to do and you didn’t deserve that.” With your gaze cast down at your hands, you apologized, but you felt even worse now because you were exactly the kind of person who had hurt him before. You were disappointed in yourself for being so careless with other people’s feelings; it was so disappointing.
Clearly, you had no regard for another person’s relationship and had slept with a taken man. Friend or not, it was a line that never should have been crossed, even the first time had been a little suspect to anyone looking from the outside in. Seeing Ian being so affected by his ex had you feeling truly ashamed over everything with Harry for the first time as you imagined how shitty his girlfriend would feel if she ever found out. It was easy to shut that off when you were with Harry or at least when you were on speaking terms, but the distance between you two and now Ian’s own experience was forcing you into giving every single possible consequence some thought and it was awful.
“Ummm…you don’t have to tell me but w-was it…Harry?” He asked, his volume lowering significantly when he spoke his name. You quickly glanced up and met his inquisitive gaze and after a few seconds he smiled knowingly and you bit your lip and looked away as your eyes started to well up. Not with hurt but actually with shame. You felt absolutely disgusting. “Hey…w-what’s wrong?” He asked and you just shook your head.
“I…kind of hate myself for it right now.” You got out and he reached for your hand.
“Hey, we all make mistakes.” He reassured you, “I’ve been there too.” He confessed and you sighed, “Look, just because I’m the victim now doesn’t mean I haven’t been the one in the hot seat.” He said with a smile and you chuckled a bit and nodded.
“Yeah…I just never thought I was capable of doing something like that…but when it’s just so…right…” you sighed, “You forget about everyone else.”
“Yeah.” He replied, he was full of understanding, which you were more than grateful for.
“How did you know? What did I do?” You asked as you rolled your eyes up, slightly irritated at yourself for not being as discreet as you believed you were. But Ian shook his head at you before responded.
“It wasn’t you at all actually, it was…all him.” He chuckled and you looked back into his eyes again. “When he would look at you it was like…you’re the eighth wonder of the world.” He explained and your heart literally fluttered in your chest. “As you were talking he like…followed your every move, reacted to every little thing. Almost as if you were the center of everything…” he shared and you licked over your lips nervously, you were doing your very best to not let this information go to your head.
“And you know this how?” You asked instead as you looked at him inquisitively.
“He’s a handsome guy! I was looking at him too.” He chuckled with a shrug and you giggled as well and nodded.
“Yeah…that he is.” You nodded in agreement.
After that you got on to a lighter topic but your mind was in some distant place thinking about Harry. About what Ian had just described to you. You’d looked at Harry like he was the center of the universe before too… 
…. 22 JULY, 2023….
You always thought he was attractive, but seeing him at the Reggio show from the friends and family section had put him on another plane for you. You had a great view of the stage and of him and the big screen with him on it. The beautiful, powerful chords of the intro to Golden filled the air around you, the bass so strong that you felt a tickle beneath your feet as the earth reverberated with his music. The beautiful, golden lights glowing behind him made him look like a god. In that moment you were filled with pride and awe, you wished he was yours to love on after everything was over. But a few people behind you was the girl he was seeing. You were standing by Jeffrey and Glenne, you were exchanging excited glances as he walked up to the mic and greeted the crowd in Italian. One hundred thousand people simultaneously cheered in response. You’d never heard anything like it! It made your heart skip a beat as your voice joined the battalion of them.
You bit your lip as your eyes honed in on his big, buff arms flexing as he strummed his guitar. You were trying not to get carried away thinking about how you’d bitten into the “can I stay” inked into his skin just a few days before in Portugal. You started laughing happily as you looked right at him, just about to burst with excitement and pride for him. And then his eyes met yours and it’s like the sound just dropped off and everything was muted down and delayed. You swear an eternity passed by as you watched his lips turning up until there was a bright and flirtatious grin on his face as he very quickly looked you up and down. 
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Your heart was hammering in your chest, you were aching to feel his lips on yours one more time…then he turned away and continued with his performance.
You were awestruck by him. You watched him give it his entire heart and soul to his audience that day, he didn’t want to go, he didn’t want it to end. And when it all ended and you were all hanging back and having celebratory drinks you got a brief moment with him when you’d run into each other outside of the bathroom. You hugged him for a few moments and smiled so wide.
“Was I good?” He asked.
“You were phenomenal. It was iconic!” You praised him as you pulled back, “I’m so proud of you, H!” You insisted passionately and he chuckled.
“Thank you. I’m happy you’re here.” He said and you smiled.
“Thank you for having me.” You chuckled. He grabbed your face gently and let his thumbs stroke over the high points of your cheeks. He smiled softly as he held eye contact with you for a few seconds before you blinked your gaze away, “Ummm…you should probably get back there. I heard your dad asking around for you.” You informed him.
“You met my dad?” He asked and you nodded, “Brad introduced us. I accidentally cursed in his face.” You sputtered on a laugh and he knocked his head back in laughter as he laughed from deep in his belly.
“What?! How?!” He questioned.
You laughed and shook your head, “He was like, “H didn’t do too bad, did?” And I was like, “Oh yeah, he was so fucking brilliant!”, I was so excited for you!” You laughed as you explained, “I watched his eyes go wide at my passion. He’s definitely gonna warn you about me.” You joked and Harry slid his hand down and then ran his thumb over your bottom lip.
“You’re so fucking cute.” He grinned.
“Yeah, so are you. Now go on.” You insisted and he looked at you suggestively with those pretty, bedroom eyes, “Go, H.” You said again.
“You’re right.” He hummed as he let go and sighed before stepping around you as if nothing had happened.
“Hey, Harry!” You called after him and he turned around, “For the record, I’m like…always right.” You smirked smugly and his lip twitched up as well.
“Noted.” He winked before disappearing for the rest of the night
….Flashback Over….
You blinked quickly a few times, not really sure how long you’d been zoned out for, “Sorry…” you apologized quickly.
“It’s alright. Touchy subject?”
“Yeah…just a bit.” You smiled and shrugged, “It’s fine…but we just haven’t talked since then.” You explained.
“He fucked you and then ditched you?!” Ian asked with a frown.
“Oh no…no, he changed his mind. He actually never showed. Which I’m so proud of him for but with that came like a no contact thing so it’s been weird just guessing what he might be up to. It’s kinda weird because we are friends, so…” you trailed off.
“Oh okay…I was about to say he’s a fucking prick.” He chuckled and you smiled and shook your head.
“Nah, he’s quite the opposite. It’s fucking infuriating.” You giggled and he nodded as he withdrew his hand. 
“I want to keep in touch, YN. I mean, maybe down the line when I’m more…myself we could try if we’re both still interested.” He said and you smiled.
“Yeah, I’d really like that.” You agreed.
At the end of the night you shared a taxi home, he wanted to make sure you got in okay. As soon as you made it past the threshold of your front door, your phone started pinging and you dug it out of your purse. You saw it was Goldie, she’d sent several good luck messages and that you should catch up about it the following day if possible. You smiled and just called her. It was barely half past eight, she should be awake. When the phone stopped ringing you spoke into the receiver.
“Hey, G. You alright?” You asked as you slipped out of your heels.
“Hey, good and you? How’d it go on the date?”
“Ummm, it was more of a “lets quit while we’re ahead” type of thing actually.” You chuckled in response, “But thanks for checking in.” You smiled. You couldn’t wait to have a cup of tea and do anything to distract you from the slight disappointment you were feeling.
“Boo…” she replied and you shrugged. “So what you’re home now?”
“Yeah, literally just got in.” You replied.
“Do you need a distraction?” She asked and you smiled.
“I certainly could.” You smiled.
“Okay, I’m actually out with Sam right now, we’re having drinks at The Ivy while we wait on Paul.” She shared, “Come! I don’t want to third wheel!” She insisted, you slightly heard Sam asking who he was inviting, “Y/N, her date night was cut short.” She explained as you seriously weighed out her invitation.
“I don’t know…I just got in…” you grumbled.
“Which means you’re already dressed up anyway!” She reasoned and you sighed and shrugged.
“Sold.” You giggled.
“Yay! We’ll see you here soon!”
“See you soon.” You agreed and quickly went touch up your make up and get on a little more perfume before rushing out of the house again and walking to the main street to catch a cab. When you got in you spotted Goldie, Sam, and Paul chatting at the bar. Goldie grinned wide and waved you over with a bright smile.
“Hi!” She beamed.
“Hey everyone!” You smiled as you walked up and greeted everyone with a quick hug and kiss on the cheek, “What’s going on?” You asked as you looked between them.
“We’re just waiting for them to figure out the table situation. Harry ended up tagging along with Paul, they just finished watching Swan Lake. We didn’t tell him that we had asked you to join already so they’re just waiting for a booth to clear up for us now.” Sam explained and you smiled and nodded but your mouth went completely dry. 
You could feel your heart starting to hammer in your chest and you were terrified of having to face him. It filled you with anxiety. You couldn’t look at him and feel unfazed yet, it would just make you feel awful and guilty and like a complete piece of shit. Your stomach was twisting and your brain working against you as it came up with catastrophic situations and fed into your anxiety.
“Ummm G, I suddenly am not feeling well.” You said softly to her and she frowned in concern. She was just about to ask you what was wrong when Paul raised his arm, capturing her and your attention.
“H, over here!” Paul spoke up and you were suddenly feeling full of anxiety as Harry surely approached the group. You didn’t want to turn around…you couldn’t face him yet. You weren’t ready!
“Hey, thank you for ummm….” He paused briefly as his eyes landed on you, “For waiting.” He finished and Paul nodded and smiled. He then proceeded to greet everyone and you very stiffly hugged him back. 
He started talking to Sam about the ballet and how incredible it had been. You were certain that if you had also been able to sit through several hours of Tchaikovsky before this run in you’d be just as composed as he was, if not more. You looked him over and smiled a bit, he was really letting loose. His hair was looking a little messy and he was growing it into some long-lost Gallagher brother-esque faux hawk-mullet hybrid that you were really loving. And his facial hair was looking fuller than before. You wanted to think he was letting himself go a bit because he missed you, but even if that were the case, he still looked infuriatingly good. And well, in his true fashion of always having to do something a little raunchy and edgy, he was wearing a t-shirt that said: I LIKE TO WATCH. If you hadn’t been so anxious about seeing him you would’ve rolled your eyes and commented it on it, maybe even gotten a lot turned on by his brazenness, but you were just trying to keep it together right now. 
Moments later you were being guided into the booth and you ensured to stay on the end in case you just needed to leave quickly at som point. Much to your dismay, he was across from you and also doing everything in his power to prevent himself from looking at you. You had soon ordered your drink and everyone else did the same plus some food. Even if you were feeling peckish, you weren’t sure you could stomach anything other than liquids at this moment.
“So what happened with your date, Y/N?” Sam asked and then everyone’s attention focused on you. You felt put on the spot and but responded anyway.
“Ummm…I kind of…messed up a tiny bit after our first date.” You explained and then frowned a bit, “That’s…a lie. I majorly messed up. And he was taking some time to think if I was worth the risk, I guess? But as he thought about it he concluded that he’s not ready to see anyone in any serious capacity right now so we’re just going to stay friends.” You summarized your conversation with Ian from earlier in the evening “And well…here I am now.” You shrugged with a tightlipped smile.
“So he asked you on a date to tell you he wasn’t going to date you?” Paul questioned.
“Well, I think I just got excited and assumed it was a date. But ummm…it wasn’t so…” you shrugged before sipping more from your drink nervously.
“So you’ve been single for a while?” Sam asked. You’d known Paul for quite a while, even before he and Sam got together, so while you’d known Sam for a few years now, he wasn’t really in your circle until more recently.
“A while is…putting it nicely.” You mumbled in slight embarrassment, “Try five years.” You chuckled and his eyes went wide.
“Holy shit!”
“Look, it’s not for lack of effort! I go on dates a lot but ummm, nothing has…panned out really.” You shrugged as you glanced down at a little snagged piece of fabric on the table cloth.
“I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, Y/N but you give “fixer” vibes.” Sam said and you looked at him in confusion.
“What does that mean?”
“Sam-” Paul started but he brushed him off.
“It’s not a bad thing! But she seems like the kind of person that makes men wish they were single again.” He said and Harry reached for his drink then, “Like look at her! She’s gorgeous and talented and smart and a fucking laugh! So when they inevitably get bored of their girlfriends and end it, they go to her and she shows them life can be fun again.” He said and you smiled slightly at him, “That getting to know someone and being with them can be exhilarating! And being the sweetheart you are,” he glanced to you, “you take care of these people. You nourish them, support them emotionally and physically…You breathe life back into them, you know?” You nodded in understanding, “And then how do they repay her kindness? They leave her high and dry despite all of the good things she did for them. That’s a fixer. Not like she seeks them out to fix them, but they need fixing and they just come to her in order to…feel something again but it’s never reciprocated.” He explained and you were trying so hard not to cry and scream “YES! THAT’S EXACTLY MY LIFE!” 
“Jesus…That’s an awful thing to say, Sam.” Paul said with disapproval and he frowned.
“You’re right. I’m sorry, Y/N.” Sam apologized quickly. “I’ve had a lot to drink already and I wasn’t thinking.” He said reaching over Goldie’s hands to grab your own and you just smiled at him and shook your head.
“Aw Sam, it’s alright, I know you didn’t mean it in a bad way. I’m not offended.” You reaffirmed, “If anything I’m…happy there’s a term for it! Thank you!” You smiled sincerely and he smiled at you with a tenderness in his eyes.
“You’re so fucking gracious.” He sighed, completely in awe of you, “I don’t deserve you as a friend.” He shook his head.
“I promise you, we’re so good, Sam. Don’t worry about it.” You reassured him and he nodded. It was still quiet at the table for a few more seconds and it was killing you, “Anyway…why didn’t you two go to the ballet?” You asked Goldie and Sam.
“We weren’t invited. Harry only invited Paul.” Sam explained with a sassy smile as he side-eyed Harry who scoffed.
“I told you I was only gifted two tickets!” Harry said. And well, you couldn’t help but wonder if he was gifted two tickets…why he hadn’t taken his girlfriend along?
“So? You can afford it, Harry.” Goldie said matter of factly, a moment of silence passed before you all burst into laughter at Goldie’s comment.
“Jesus, I didn’t know everyone was so into the fucking ballet.” He mumbled making you all continue laughing.
  “You didn’t think maybe your friends would want to spend time with you?”
“Not on my dime.” He joked.
“It’s how the rich the stay rich.” Sam shrugged as you all laughed along.
“I kid…” Harry smiled easily, “Next time.” He assured and Goldie looked at him with raised eyebrows, “I promise.” He chuckled and she grinned.
“I’ll be waiting.” She hummed and then the topic changed again to something else that wasn’t you and you were more than grateful about that.
You were getting tired mentally from going against every single signal your brain would send, tempting you to just stare at Harry and get lost in him. It was like there was this pull that drew you to his movements, you just wanted to sit and admire him. You wished you could scoot in beside him and feel his warmth coming off of him. You wondered if in another world you could do just that. Yeah, you knew that he probably missed you, but he hadn’t picked you. You needed to stop being so pathetic by wishing for a miracle. Especially by staying so hung up on him despite the time that had transpired and the circumstance you two had been in. You just needed to collect yourself for a moment.
“I’m going to the bathroom. Be right back.” You said lowly to Goldie before standing and heading off. You heard Harry say, “Me too.” before the sound of his foot steps got closer and closer to you. You started walking a bit faster to make it there before he had the chance to catch up to you because you didn’t need this right now. You needed the distance so fucking bad, no matter how much you wanted him close by.
“Hey, wait up!” He called out as he fastened his pace to catch up with you.
“I was getting up to get away from you, you know?” You said with a smile as he came up beside you.
He glanced to you quickly, “Sorry.” He smiled and you turned back to look ahead of you. “Are you doing anything after this?” He asked you and you glanced to him with an insulted look on your face and suddenly he gasped and grabbed your arm hard and pulled you into him.  “Almost crashed into a waiter.” He informed and you glanced up at him.
“Thanks.” You said and he nodded.
“And I don’t mean it like that.” He said, “Just want to talk. I have some things I need to say.” He said as you stopped before the bathroom doors.
“I’ll think about it.” 
“Okay, thank you. I’ll offer you a ride home and ummm, if you decline then that’s that. Sound good?” He asked and you nodded in agreement before you hurried into the bathroom. You just looked in the mirror, weighing out your options. Of course you wanted to hear what he had to say, you couldn’t avoid him forever, and you had to start practicing your self control sooner or later. You could do this. 
After Harry asked to talk to you and you had decided to hear what he had to say, time seemed to be moving slower than ever. Hearing him out could potentially help you move on as well, but now that you wanted to hear it it was like everything was preventing that from happening, it was making you second guess yourself and you started debating it in your head. Then, the next thing you knew Harry was standing before you asking,
“Do you want a ride home? The driver is heading your way after dropping me off.” He looked at you expectantly and everything fell still as you nodded.
“Yeah, that’d be great. Thank you so much.” You accepted and you watched as his lips turned up as he assured you it was no big deal. 
You started saying goodbye to the rest of your friends before you were following Harry to the curb where his driver was waiting. You settled in as he shared the new plan for the evening with his driver for the night, Jaime. Next, he put up the partition before settling into his seat. He glanced up at you as he pulled out his phone.
“Address is still the same?” He asked and you nodded and he started typing away and sent it off to the driver before setting it aside and looking at you.
“What did you need to say?” You asked and he sighed.
“That I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for putting you in the position I did.” You shook your head.
“It wasn’t just you. I was a willing participant.” You added.
“But I always sought you out.” He said and you smile slightly and nodded, it was true.
“Well, I accept your apology. Thanks for that.”
“It’s the least I could do.” He said as he reached for your hand and you let him take it and you gave him a squeeze before letting go.
“What made you change your mind?” You asked and he smiled a bit.
“We were fighting about you in the car and it hit me that I was terrified of her ever finding out about this. Like, I genuinely felt scared of losing her.” He said and you nodded in understanding. “Was the guy you had seen tonight still the guy from the party? The professor?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yep.” You confirmed.
“Bummer. I’m sorry.”
“Yeah.” You sighed. “I…really hit him where it hurt. His fiancée was cheating on him, so when I left him for you, he…just took it really hard.”
“Shit…” Harry frowned and you nodded.
“I know. It put a lot into perspective for me and like…I don’t want to be that person either. I don’t want hurt anyone like that. This isn’t fair.”
“Yeah.” Harry agreed, “I want to be friends though. You’re fucking sick.” He said with a genuine smile and you smiled down at your hands .
“Thanks, so you are you, Harry.”
“You know something? I still can’t get over the fact that your favorite song is Burning Love.” He mumbled through a widening grin. “It’s just…you don’t seem like the type to listen to Elvis.”
“I don’t. Just that song because that’s what my favorite burger is called from the Red Robin burger chain, I’d sing it every time I’d have one and it grew on me.” You shrugged with a smile and he chuckled.
“You’re fucking lovely, you know that?” He asked and you giggled and rolled your eyes playfully. Then a silence took over you two and he sighed, “I know I just said that I was afraid of losing her but ummm…can I just say that things at home have been…a little rough lately?”
“Do you want to talk about it?” You asked.
“Do you mind?” He asked back and you shook your head.
“I don’t.” You assured him.
“Well, I don’t know…like I’m prioritizing us more, but I don’t know…when issues keep coming up and like…I feel I’m always the one having to compromise or apologize, you know? She doesn’t like to work through things as they come up and it kills me. You know how I am…” he said and you nodded, “And if I want to resolve anything I always have to take the blame and it takes a toll, even though I know it’s not always my fault.” He vented, “Anyway, she’s out of town right now, s’why she didn’t go with me tonight. But it’s for the best, I think. I just need a little space after we argue about something big.” He explained.
“I’m sorry, Harry.” You said comfortingly. “But you know, sometimes things get a little worse before they take a turn for the better.”
“You’re right.” He decided after a few pensive moment, “I really am trying to make that better s’also why I’ve been so distant from you. I’m just trying to prioritize her and us. It’s not because…you “fixed” me and I bailed on you, or whatever Sam was saying.” He explained with a roll of his eyes, clearly still very irritated at what Sam had said.
“Well, I can’t say I wasn’t expecting it at some point.” You shrugged with a small smile.
“But did it…feel that way for you? That you were…fixing the things I didn’t like about myself in my relationship?” He asked and you shook your head.
“Not with you.” You assured, “What was there to fix? I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you for not liking everything about your relationship or how it’s panning out. As long as there are humans involved there are bound to be good and bad things, you know? And I mean, we’re all different and have different likes and needs. I mean, was it a dick thing for us to do? Of course it was but…I think what needed to happen, happened. And well, at the end of the day you realized that she’s more important to you than the sex! And that’s great. I mean, I’m happy for you. I’m glad that you figured that out.” you said with a smile, despite feeling like your heart was withering away little by little. You then looked out the window as you saw the scenery changing, indicating you were nearing his side of town.
“Hey.” He reached for your hand again and you turned back to him again, “I just wanted you to know that yeah, the sex was…incredible,” he smiled bashfully, “but it wasn’t just that for me.” He said and your lips turned down in a small pout as his words registered in your brain. “I started to blur the lines a lot, I mean, you know that and you always set me straight and it…hurt though. And seeing you with that guy-”
“Ian.” You added and he nodded.
“Yeah, seeing you with Ian at that party made me so upset. I could see that you guys were into each other. It’s why I went and found you afterwards.” He confessed, “I wanted you to have me fresh on your mind if anything were to happen between you two.” He explained shamefully and your eyes filled with sadness, “I was selfish and I…was so out of line for that and then just…left you hanging.” He sighed with a sad smile on his face. Your eyes were threatening to spill the tears that were already built up in them, effectively blurring your vision. 
“And now, hearing what went down with him I feel like shit because I took that opportunity from you. I literally ruined that for you to just give you pieces of my attention when you deserve far more than that.” He frowned, “And while I have acted so selfishly when it comes to you, I really want you to know that I wasn’t just using you for sex. Like I can’t help but think that if we had run into each other again just even a few months earlier on the tour then we would probably be-”
“Don’t.” You whispered as your tears started to spill over when he said that. He looked to you with concern as you sniffled, “Fuck me…” You whispered spitefully at yourself and he quickly reached over to grab a few tissues from the box nestled into the holder before him. You took them and expertly dabbed at your eyes. 
“I’m sorry.” He apologized.
“It’s fine.” You mumbled as you dabbed beneath your nose as well.
“It’s not though.” He pressed as he watched you trying to keep it all together right now.
“It is, Harry!” You snapped suddenly. The silence that followed between the two of you was deafening. “It has to be fine.” You insisted assertively. It wasn’t even three seconds before you immediately regretted your explosive reaction, “I’m so sorry for raising my voice at you, Harry.” You apologized immediately and his gaze softened. 
He admired you so fucking much. You were so good at this part, at the hard things. You listened to understand, not to respond and fight back. He felt safe sharing everything with you, he wasn’t afraid that you would judge him like he feared his girlfriend would sometimes. The proof was even in your sexual relationship, you tried things with him that he had been judged for in the past just because they probably weren’t expected to be part of his preferences. He certainly had a deeper interest in you, just based off of the time your lips weren’t attached to each others, you connected so well. You could talk about things as silly as your preferred brand of ketchup or as serious and daunting as the state of the world, and then find a way to transition into passionate and genuine sex, the most primal form of human connection. So…when he had moments like this, where he was reminded of how fortunate he was to know you, things got a little bit murky in his brain, which is why he responded to your outburst in the following manner.
“It’s alright, angel.” He reassured you as he grabbed your face gently in his hand. The term of endearment he used for you just slipped out and made him fall into this much more intimate space that you two had shared before. When he realized what he had done he sighed, “Maybe this was a bad idea.” He said as he pulled away. Watching him go from so vulnerable to regretful of it was so painful and he could see it in your eyes, “I never intended to hurt you with this.” He said with a sense of remorse sinking into his chest, it was making him feel like breathing was getting harder to do.
“No, I needed to hear all of this to…help me move on.” You said and that made his guts twist with hurt, but he nodded along with a small and unconvincing smile anyway. 
You could see in his eyes that his mind was off somewhere far, far away from this place. You too wanted to be so far removed mentally and emotionally, but you really needed to bask in the hurt and the feelings of disappointment of what could’ve been so that you could just really get it through your head that this was absolutely done. Yeah, you wanted to stay friends but you both needed to shake your feelings before you could be together in any space again without feeling that pull that was still there, even now. 
“Ummm, I know we said that we want to stay friends, but I think we need to give it some time just to…not risk repeating history, you know?” You suggested.
“Yeah, you’re probably right.” He agreed as you guys turned onto his street. You looked out the window as you drifted off into thought.
One of your friends from university had contacted you about coming to help with his debut album, it would require you going back to America for at least three months. Maybe more if any major changes or hitches occurred in the project. You hadn’t decided yet, but maybe you should do it. A change of scenery and pace could help you move on. You could reconnect with old friends, meet new people, get your creativity flowing…this could be really good for you.You remained silent until you were pulling up to the perimeter gate around his property line.
“Well…” you sighed as the large gates started to part after the driver input the code.
“Do you need the bathroom or water or anything before you go?” He asked and you shook your head. You knew better than to go into his house right now that his girlfriend was gone. You knew he was just being polite, he didn’t mean it suggestively.
But then again, with your prior arrangement, he could have you even now if he wanted. You’d let him. You’d want him so long as he wanted you, so you it was easy to give him that power over you. He knew that already and with one shared gaze you could see that he was thinking exactly what you’d been thinking. You smirked knowingly and he just smiled so brightly as he grabbed your face and smushed his lips to your forehead. 
“Cheeky.” He mumbled before pulling back to meet your gaze again.
“Said the pot to the kettle.” You sniggered and he smiled down at you.
“Take good care of yourself, love.” He said as the car rolled slowly to a stop.
“You too, H.” You smiled as he leaned in to hug you. You quickly kissed cheeks before he pulled back and slid out of the backseat. He rounded over to the driver’s side and you rolled the window down to see him off.
“Jaime, thank you so much mate.” Harry said as he handed him over a generous cash tip.
“H, not this again.” He said pressing it back towards Harry.
“If not for me, at least for making the extra stop.” He said, “Please. I insist.”
“This is the last time.” He grumbled and Harry chuckled.
“Alright, well get her home safe, for me. Precious cargo.” Harry said as he smiled at you.
“Certainly, H. Good night.” Jaime said and he bid him goodnight before reaching for your hand and holding on until Jaime had driven you far enough that your hands pulled apart. You slid back into the window and rolled it up. You didn’t even feel like crying, you felt alright for now. But the important thing was that you left each other well and that was the best thing that could’ve happened. Yeah, it hurt that it seemed like you’d missed each other in life but at least there were memories you could share.
…. TWO MONTHS LATER ….
You were currently crowded into the corner of the rooftop at The Roosevelt for some fashion ambassadors event by some brand. Your friend, Monty had been booked as the entertainment for the evening and he pulled you in to play the bass for his band at the last minute. You were just grooving along as you played “Something” by The Beatles. You loved playing this song, it had such a fun and iconic bass line. And as you looked around the crowd you caught a glimpse of Harry’s girlfriend in the audience, she was looking right at you and when your gazes met she turned away and started talking to the person behind her. You found that odd, but decided to leave it. You’d only interact if your paths crossed.
But just as fate would have it, as you walked up to the open bar during a break in the set, you both just happened to break through the crowd at the same time and stepped up to the bar together. She glanced at you and you smiled at her.
“Hey. It’s nice to see you again.” You greeted her politely.
“Hi.” She smiled half-heartedly and her gaze was kind of cold.
“How are you?” You asked her a bit awkwardly.
“I’m fine and you?” 
“I’m good. Been pretty good, been out here for a couple months already for work.” You shared and she hummed with a polite smile. It was awkward because you really weren’t friends or anything, so you decided to bring up the person who had been the common link between you two. “H-how’s Harry?” You asked and her smile dropped immediately.
“Look Y/N, I’m sure you’re a nice person but I don’t want you going near him anymore. I don’t care if you’re friends. I’m sorry if that offends you, but I just don’t trust you.” She said lowly. You didn’t know if he had told her what had transpired between you two but it’s the only thing that made sense. And because of this, you nodded in response, letting her know you understood and respected her wishes. She looked hesitant before speaking again, but said it anyway, “I know you…slept with him.” She informed you, voice still softer than before and your throat dried up. 
You couldn’t breathe and you just felt completely humiliated as you looked right in her face as she said this to you. But now it made sense, why she was acting so cold towards you. She knew what you and Harry had done and now you had to face the music, like an adult. No excuses and no shifting blame. All you could do now was apologize to her for sleeping with her boyfriend and assure her that it was purely carnal and it would never happen again.
“I’m so sorry. I know you might not believe me but I mean, I feel awful about the whole thing. I swear it wasn’t more than those couple of times and it was purely physical. I haven’t tried to contact him at all or-”
“Couple of times? Why would you feel bad about sleeping with him before?” She questioned with confusion and you suddenly felt your stomach drop to the ground as you realized that she in fact didn’t know the full story. Well, now she did and you could see the cogs in her brain turning as she pieced the information together.
Harry had told her something else and you had no fucking clue what that had been! You knew you had to get out of this somehow, but you were completely frozen as the realization hit her like a ton of bricks. It’s not like you could take back what you had said. But if you could give anything up in the world to turn back time and say something else, you would. Your eyes started welling up as you felt this sense of doom starting to seep into your body, it traveled from deep in your guts to the rest of your body as she looked at you expectantly. You shook your head and she stepped closer to you.
“How many times, Y/N?” She asked and you shook your head again, “Fucking tell me.” She pressed, trying to keep her anger at bay.
“Four or five times. I-i think.” You stammered as your tears started to streak down your cheeks.
“When was the last time?” She asked and you swallowed thickly as you fought to keep the words in. “Y/N.” She pressed and you sniffled.
“Look, he loves you and he-”
“Tell me, you fucking slut.” She hissed quietly, all you could see in her eyes was rage.
“M-march.” You said and she inhaled deeply and pressed her lips together for a second before looking off as she processed the information. She then turned to you with disgust painted all over her features, “Fuck you. Stay the hell away from him or else. Do you understand?” She admonished and you nodded quickly as you blinked back tears before hurrying off. 
You were panicking as you searched around for Monty, he had the room key for the suite you had been given to hang out in during the day. And right now you needed to get to your phone and warn Harry before she got a chance to go off on him. You were weaving through the crowd trying to find Monty and then you spotted Harry’s girlfriend leaving the event with her phone pressed to her ear and a scowl on her face. That image alone made your stomach turn uncomfortably and one single thought crossed your mind: Harry was going to hate you forever now.
****************
Waiting for Harry to call you was miserable. Hours passed, then, it had been a day. Then, two days. Then, a week. And once that week hit you were resigned to the fact that even your friendship with him was over and that’s why he wasn’t talking to you. You hadn’t meant to sabotage him or his relationship, but you’d made his worst fear come true. You were dying to reach out but you were scared that you’d just make things worse. 
But also, how the hell were you supposed to know that he’d said something else about your relationship? But just the way that she had been acting towards you made you believe that she knew that you two had slept together while they were dating. If he’d been single when you slept together there was no need to for her to be acting upset or cold towards you unless she was just extremely jealous. Which now, was more than justified. The only other person you could turn to at the moment was Ian because he had figured it out on his own, but you didn’t want to bother him with any of this. It wasn’t his to fuss over and he was still dealing with his own infidelity problems. Your time in LA was coming to a close quickly and you were petrified.
You were so nervous to go home. The community in London was quite small and word got around fast, especially when the gossip involved someone as famous as Harry, it was one of the downsides of his success. But if you had made the mistake, then you needed to face the consequences of the mistake as well. If you lost friends or if people stopped trusting you then, so be it. You had done something awful and you had to tough it out.
“Hey.” You heard and turned around to see your friend Monty stepping out onto the small balcony that came with his apartment. 
“Hi.” You responded with a small smile and he came over and plopped down into the seat beside you and exhaled slowly, like he was letting something off of his chest. 
You were crashing in his guest bedroom for the duration of your stay and were taking advantage of the Southern California sunsets while you had the chance to. Your trips to America were mostly to New York and it was so different than this. People were in a rush here too, like in every big city, but they were so much nicer about it here. Well, so long as your decision making didn’t take time out of their day. Regardless, you weren’t ready to go back to the reality surely awaiting you in London.
“You alright?” He asked and you nodded, “Sure? You’ve been…weird.” He said with a small smile and you sighed.
“I did a bad thing, Monty.” You said and he frowned, “A really bad thing.”
“D-do you want to talk about it?” He asked and you smiled.
“Depends…just promise you won’t judge me too harshly.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He replied and you smiled, but then it faded away and you sighed.
“I…had sex with one of my friends. Multiple times. But he’s…in a relationship.” You admitted and he turned to you.
“That’s it?” He asked seriously, but seconds later a smile broke past his lips and you chuckled.
“Thanks for trying…” You mumbled and he laughed.
“Yeah, of course.” He chuckled, “But ummm, seriously, there are worse things you could do, Y/N.” He said.
“I suppose so…”
“More seriously though, we all make mistakes. And I know you well and I know that you wouldn’t just do that for anyone. You must really care about him if you were willing to break all the rules for him.”
“I do. But feelings don’t justify hurting another person. And well…I ran into his girlfriend at the gig last week and she said that she knew we had slept together and so I assured her that it was just those couple times but she didn’t know it was a couple of times or that it was recent. She thought this had happened while he was still single, which the first time we did, he was!” You explained, “But her confrontation made me panic and I…spilled my guts! So I…did a bad thing and then probably ruined his relationship on top of that.” You sighed, still feeling the guilt making you feel sick to your stomach.
“Let me stop you right there.” Monty smiled, “You didn’t ruin their relationship. He ruined it himself by pursuing you. If he truly loved the person he was with, nothing could make him stray. So stop taking responsibility for things that aren’t yours to be responsible for. You hear me?” He asked and you nodded a few times with a small smile. “Next thing, forgive yourself in your own and don’t do it ever again. You learned the lesson didn’t you?”
“Yeah.” You confirmed.
“Then stop torturing yourself and move on.” He advised, “It might take time, but take the first step now. Sitting here and torturing yourself over something that’s in the past is not going to do anything for you or for them.”
“He hasn’t…reached out or anything. I really thought he would.” You said with a small voice and Monty hummed.
“But, you know what that means then, right? That he’s…made his decision and it’s not you.” Monty stated and you exhaled shakily as a few silent tears streaked down your face. 
“You’re right.” You concurred before looking ahead again, watching the sky change colors as the sun sunk deeper and deeper into the horizon. 
********************
You were finally getting home after the near 11 hour flight from LA. You were nervous to run into Harry because you still hadn’t heard from him and assumed that it was because of the same thing Monty had told you, he was working things out with his girlfriend. She had wanted you out of his life, she said it to you herself. So it made sense why he hadn’t reached out to you. You imagined that he hated himself a little bit for doing it this way, but if it gave his partner peace, he would sacrifice his preferred method of dealing with shit and find closure another way. You were similar to him in this as well, you wanted to apologize to him and explain that you didn’t air his dirty laundry on purpose! Even if he still decided to never speak to you again, at least you’d get to say your piece! You’d definitely prefer his silence from that than the ‘pretend Y/N doesn’t exist’ method he was using now. But considering you might not have the chance to do that, you too needed to find another way in which to close the door on Harry for good.
Your thoughts were racing as you cycled through your tasks in a disorganized fashion. You had started unpacking your luggage to put things in the washing machine but then decided that you needed to brew yourself some coffee to help keep you awake so that you wouldn’t have jet lag. But while you waited for your coffee to brew you decided to have a quick body shower so that you could complete all your tasks in a fresh and comfy outfit. And when you emerged from the bathroom, wrapped in a towel you groaned and saw the outfit you wanted to wear was sitting in the dirty laundry portion of your suitcase. You were starting to get annoyed and decided you needed your caffeine immediately. And when you made it to the kitchen you saw your empty mug sitting under your Nespresso because you forgot to add water to it and that was your last straw.
All of the anger and frustration that you had pent up inside from the situation with Harry, how tired you were, and how scatter-brained you felt just bubbled over and you grabbed the mug in fit of rage and threw it on the ground, shattering it into an irreparable heap of ceramic.
“Fuck my life!” You shouted, your chest was rising and falling dramatically as you started to get choked up. You sniffled as your tears blurred your vision and you started to cry. You’d been trying to keep it together, to not be upset at any of it because you had been the one in the wrong, but it still hurt. It hurt to know that Harry had feelings for you but not enough to choose you. It hurt to know that your friendship with him was more than likely over. It hurt to know that you’d compromised a part of yourself, that you’d stooped so fucking low for absolutely nothing at all in return! All you’d truly gained was a fuck ton of self-loathing and you couldn’t pretend that you didn’t deserve it because you absolutely did.
*****************
Harry’s POV
When Harry’s girlfriend called and confronted him about what you’d shared with her at whatever party you two were at, he was livid. He immediately thought the worst thing, that you were trying to get him back or to sabotage his relationship. But when the initial wave of rage subsided and he was able to think a bit more rationally, he recalled how you’d also respected the fact that, that’s where he would be focusing all of his efforts. And you had said that you cared for him and if that were true, you would never do anything to hurt him on purpose. He had to believe that and he had to cling to that. 
When his girlfriend returned home she gave him an ultimatum, if he wanted things to move forward in their relationship then he had to leave you out of his life. He felt sick to his stomach upon hearing that so he’s not sure why he agreed to it so easily, but he did. It had been weeks now and the more days passed by, his regret in this decision only grew. He was sitting in mediocrity, in routine, and a lot spite towards himself. Did he deserve it, yes, but he couldn’t see a world in which they could make it past this with the way she was acting. She would just pretend she wasn’t upset about it and then when they’d have a disagreement it always got thrown back in his face, no matter how much he apologized for it. When he’d ask what he needed to do to make it better she’d say she didn’t know or when he wanted to help her understand why he did what he’d done, she didn’t want to face it! But when she’d get frustrated about it, she’d blow up on him and not let him respond. And it started to sink in that he had made a mistake in trying to force things to work with her and he had to say something.
This is why he found himself waiting up for her to get back in from a rehearsal. He needed to get some things off his chest. Harry was one to talk things out, he didn’t like to sit on things and let them brew and fester like she did. And that’s what he’d been doing a lot of lately, just sitting in dissatisfaction. When he heard the front door open he sat up, more than prepared to just get the conversation over with. 
“Hey babe, still up?” He heard her approaching.
“Yeah. Waited up.” He responded and she smiled as she came through the door and directly to the bed and kissed his lips. He was a little stiff in returning the kiss and she sniggered, “What’s the matter?” She asked, with a dimpled smile adorning her face. And as he looked into her eyes he just felt the need to be honest with her.
“Ummm…I…I can’t do this anymore.” He said softly and her smiled faded. She blinked a few times, as if she were trying to determine if this was real or not.
“Seriously, Harry?” She scoffed with an angry but surprised expression on her face.
“I’m sorry.” He apologized as he looked deep into her eyes to show his sincerity, but soon her eyes were narrowing into angry slits.
“Wait…Are you dumping me for her?” She asked and he sighed. “Oh my god…” she mumbled incredulously as she stood and paced around as Harry got out of the bed and walked up to her and grabbed her shoulders from behind and she whipped around, “Don’t fucking touch me!” She shouted at him and he frowned but nodded. “What does she have that I don’t, Harry?” She asked sadly and he shook he sighed. He didn’t want to go down that road, she never saw when she was in the wrong and it would just make things worse, but he needed to be honest.
“It’s not that there’s anything wrong with you.” He explained, “It’s just different with her and she’s more…open to things th-that you don’t like and that I find myself…wanting more of.” He explained and she scoffed.
“That’s it?! All the sex shit I refuse to do?” She asked through a scoff, “Are you fucking kidding me?! You know, she’s only into that shit because she’s fucked up, Harry! Only a fucked up person can find pleasure in being used and degraded that way!” His features furrowed in offense.
“So what does that make me then?” She frowned when she realized what she’d just said.
“Harry, it’s not-”
“No, please, give it to me straight! It was my idea, I’m the one who brought that into our affair and she liked it. So if she’s fucked up for liking it, then what am I for wanting it?” He questioned and she shook her head.
“I just…I don’t understand it.” She said, “It’s not…normal.” She elaborated and he smiled sarcastically.
“Yeah alright, let’s say you’re right and it’s not. So what we do is normal?” He asked her, “Just the same thing, over and over and over again? After a fucking year together you refuse to even try new things with me! All you do is judge me for it? It’s like you don’t trust me!” 
“I don’t! I don’t trust you when you’re in that headspace, Harry! What if you hurt me? What if you can’t stop?!” He rolled his eyes.
“I’m not a fucking monster!” He shouted back, “That’s the fucking point of all of it, to exercise control or to relinquish it! It’s all a two way street! But quite frankly, it never has been with you…” he said and she scoffed.
“I do things for you!” She shouted back and he rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, your half-assed head really makes me feel close to you.” He murmured sarcastically and she groaned.
“You know that I don’t like to because you’re too big for my comfort and I don’t want to get all messy and…it doesn’t make me feel good! It makes me feel cheap and used!” She shouted back and he nodded.
“Yeah, how do you think I feel whenever I’m the one pulling all the weight in our sex life and in this relationship? I want to enjoy it, I want feel good in this relationship too!” He exclaimed, “I fucking dread it when I know you want to fuck! Or when you’re upset at something! I really fucking do!” He confessed and it felt so good to say it and she frowned deeply upon hearing him say that.
“So that’s all that matters to you? The sex?” She asked sadly.
“Of course not, but it’s pretty fucking important to me.” He said and she rolled her eyes.
“And what about everything else? What about the emotional and intellectual connection we have? W-we have that down at the very least don’t we?” She asked and he sighed.
“Sure…but it’s…more w-with her.” He said and she shook her head in disbelief, “There are things about how she is that just…resonate more with me. It’s not just the sex, it’s a lot of things that we deal with more similarly.”
“Okay, like what then?” She asked and he sighed.
“Like now, when we’re arguing about something or needing to discuss something serious. You…just pretend like nothing is wrong until you can’t handle it anymore. And when I try to talk about it then this happens! You just shout and shout and never fucking listen t-to what I’m trying to say or how I feel. And when I try to bring that up, you always say you’re not ready to talk about it!”
“Yeah, I like to think through things, Harry! Not argue in circles!” She defended herself and he groaned.
“We only argue in circles because you don’t listen to anything I’m trying to say to you!” He explained already feeling exasperated, “You’re doing it now! Things don’t have to escalate into a fight whenever we disagree about something, we could discuss it. That’s the point of talking it through then and there. While emotions are fresh and the situation is at hand! You use your words to communicate how you feel and what you want. I’m not a mind reader, I don’t know what you’re thinking or how long you’re gonna take to think about things, at least communicate that!” He explained and she sighed.
“Well, that’s not how I like to do things.”
“Well, there are two people in this relationship. Two different people with their own needs and expectations, not just you.” He said and she scoffed.
“Oh please! And all this with Y/N wasn’t just about you? Fucking someone else while we were together, that wasn’t selfish of you?”
“Of course it was! I know it was and it was wrong of me. I recognize that I made a mistake in going to another person.” He accepted, “And I’m sorry that you’ve been hurt in the process. She told me, multiple times to just talk to you so that I wouldn’t have to go find happiness somewhere else and I tried! I really fucking tried and it’s just…not happening for me with you.” He said sadly.
“And what, she’s going to make you happy?” She asked sarcastically.
“I don’t know, but I have to try, if only to rule out the fact that she’s not the one for me.” Harry said and that’s when she started to cry. 
Of course he felt awful about it, but just now, hearing her even say some of the things she had said made him feel like he didn’t fully know her. And more than that, the things she had said were mean and offensive. He understood that she was hurt, but he’d never considered that she could stoop that low, even when angry.
“I fucking hate you.” She seethed as she stormed off into the ensuite and he sighed as he sat down on the edge of the bed. Moments later she returned with the clothes from her designated drawers piled up in her arms and she dropped them on the bed. “Can you at least grab my suitcase from the top shelf? I can’t reach it.” She said and he nodded and did as she asked.
“Do you want me t-to give you some space?” He asked and she sniffled.
“Do whatever you fucking want, Harry.” She mumbled through her tears as she continued putting clothes into her large suitcase. He sighed and stood before going down to the kitchen to set the kettle for some tea. 
It was about twenty minutes later when she called him up to help her bring her things down as her friend would be arriving soon. He did just that and soon she was coming down the staircase with her duffle bag hanging off of her shoulder.
“Where are you going to stay?” He asked.
“With a cast mate.” She mumbled, “At least until I can go back home.” She said and he nodded.
“Can you just let me know when you’re in safe for the night?”
“Oh, now you care…” she mumbled.
“I do care about you. I have this entire time, I just-”
“Care about her more.” She said plainly.
“I was going to say that I’m just not in love with you anymore.” He said and she sighed.
“You know, I don’t think I am either.” She confessed, “I thought we were fine but…I guess, fine is rather anticlimactic in a relationship.” She said morosely.
“Yeah.” He concurred. Then, her phone chimed to indicate her ride was here and she went over to the security keypad by the door and opened up the gate for her friend to get through. He helped her get her things outside and into the boot of the car. She came over with her duffle and he grabbed it from her and neatly set it beside her suitcase before pulling the door of the boot down gently.
“If I find anything else of yours should I send it to your flat in New York?” He asked.
“Yes, please.” She confirmed.
“Okay, no problem. I really am sorry, I know that I went about things the complete wrong way, but-”
“You know what, just save it, Harry. I really don’t give a fuck.” She said with a tired smile and he licked over his lips and nodded awkwardly before clearing his throat.
“Well, then…I uh-”
“I really hope that fucking whore is worth it for whatever time you have together.” She cut him off, “And I hope it’s painfully miserable for you two and that she cheats on you too. And when she does, because a whore can’t help herself, and I inevitably hear about it through the grapevine, just know I’m going to be so fucking ecstatic. I will not hesitate to reach out to you just to rub it in your stupid, fucking face, Harry.” She said spitefully and he couldn’t help but smirk as she wished him ill. He just had never seen this side of her.
“Alright, love, you do that. Use up all your free time to keep tabs on me.” He mumbled sarcastically.
“Fuck you, Harry!” She spat before walking around him to get into the car. He sighed as he walked back up to the front door and he heard her shouting at her friend that she didn’t want to talk about it and to just go. So the car started again and he waved them off with a smile as she stuck her hand out the window and flipped him the bird as they took off into the night.
Yeah, he deserved everything she’d said. He’d definitely been a bad boyfriend, particularly towards the end there, but he felt relieved. Relieved that he no longer had to be the only one compromising. Relieved that he’d no longer have to skirt around things and keep shit bottled up inside to keep her comfortable. And relieved that at least now, he’d have the chance to explore having more with you. He truly had no idea if during your time apart you’d managed to move on fully. Or if his silence over the last few weeks had made you hate him or if it’d completely broken your heart to the point that you no longer wanted anything with him. But regardless of all of that, he was certain of one thing, which was that you’d at least hear him out and let him apologize and explain. If it were his ex that he was trying to fix things with, well, he’d assume that her reception would be similar to her goodbye to him. Even if you wanted nothing to do with him in a romantic or sexual sense anymore, he knew you’d still find it in your heart to stay friends with him and he reckoned that even that would be enough for him.
…. A FEW DAYS LATER ….
You had been doing a bit better now that you were back home. You’d come clean to Goldie about what had transpired between you and Harry. And while she was shocked and disappointed in the both of you, she was still there for you and let you cry out your hurt and disappointment. What you feared would happen, being ostracized and judged harshly, wasn’t the case, thankfully. In fact, Goldie had just invited you out with her Sam, and Paul. She assured you that she hadn’t heard of Harry joining, but you wanted to err on the side of caution for the time being and respect the very clear distance that had been put in place by him. Even if Harry didn’t show up, if his girlfriend saw that you were out with more of his friends it might make her feel like you were purposefully encroaching into his life. You had already done enough to complicate things between them, so you needed to be mindful of things like this.
“Thanks, G. It’s sweet of you but I’m just not up for it tonight. Especially not with Paul around. If she sees something from the paps or even social media it could upset her and I don’t want to risk upsetting her even more.” You explained.
“Oh, babe…I appreciate you wanting to do the noble thing, but you really need to get out a bit to get all this off your mind, you know?” She countered and you smiled.
“How about this? I make a reservation at Cecconi’s for tomorrow in the late afternoon. We have an early dinner with a few Negronis and that phenomenal mixed berries cheesecake they serve! And then, when we’re well buzzed, we go to SOHO House? We can get drunk and flirt with people, and network.” You grinned as you giggled.
“We have to look fit. I mean FIT!” She emphasized and you giggled again.
“Yeah, you can even come over and get ready together!” You offered since you lived closest to SOHO. 
“Alright! We can make a whole day out of it! I can bring bagels from Papo’s! And we can have Prosecco’s and coconut water so that we’re drunk, but hydrated!” She shared excitedly.
“Yeah, alright.” You agreed.
“I’ll pop in around 9:30 or 10?”
“Yeah, that’s perfect.” You agreed and she squealed happily.
“I’m so excited! Can’t wait!”
“Neither can I!” You assured happily.
“Ah, alright babes, I’m gonna let you go. Have a good night, yeah?”
“You too, G. See ya’ later.”
“See ya’!” She chirped before hanging up. 
You smiled to yourself as you finished packing your left over dinner. You then headed up to your room to just wash up and get into your pajamas so that you wouldn’t have to get up and do all this if you accidentally fell asleep while watching TV. You went over to your window and opened it up to let the cool temperature of the night waft in. You then went about and lit a few candles before turning down you bed and switching on your sunset lamp, projecting a warm pink and orange collage on your ceiling. You set down the remote on your bedside table and then bit your lip as you saw your wand vibrator’s light blinking steadily as it charged up. 
Next on your list was your weed, it was just three prerolls that you’d smuggled in from LA. Stupid and risky, yes. But worth it. You grabbed one of the little tubes and went to set it down by your bean bag sofa chair along with the ashtray and lighter in your hand. You then headed downstairs to grab a glass of water and your dark chocolate KitKat that you’d purchased earlier when you’d decided on how you’d spend your evening. You were switching off all the lights and then stopped before the front door for just a moment, and then your doorbell rang. You flinched in fright at the unlikely coincidence, and chills tingled your spine as the chime sounded through the townhome. It wasn’t all that late, but a little too late for deliveries. You quietly padded up to the door and tiptoed a little bit to look through the peep hole and froze.
Your mouth slightly dropped open in shock when you saw Harry standing at your doorstep looking right to left as he tapped his foot nervously. You felt a lump forming in your throat and your heart rate started to rise rapidly. You were tingling all over with excitement, fear, dread, and happiness. Suddenly he looked right at the peephole, it made your insides churn violently as you made eye contact through the little lens.
“Y/N?” He asked and you relished at the sound of his voice, but felt your chest ache because he needed to leave.
“You shouldn’t be here, Harry.” You said through the door.
“I need to be here, angel.” He said  and you felt your chest tighten up. You pulled back and turned the locks to open the door and as soon as you were in front of him he just chuckled happily and stepped forward, pushing his way inside so that he could wrap you up in his arms. He just threw the door back before he pulled you into his chest. “Hi, angel.” He hummed lowly as he leaned his face against the side of your head.
“Hi!” You laughed happily as you settled into his warmth. You were pleasantly surprised that he was here. In the flesh! You were touching him, breathing him in. You gently tickled his back with your nails and he hummed.
“Missed you, angel.” He hummed and you smiled.
“Missed you too.” You responded, “Are you alright?” You asked him and started to pull back.
“Yeah, I’m alright.” He smiled, “I ummm…I ended things with her.” He said of his girlfriend, well, ex-girlfriend now. 
“I’m so sorry. Are you sure you’re alright?” You asked and he nodded again.
“Even more so now.” He flirted and you sniggered a bit and you just looked at each other in silence for a few seconds, “Look, I’m so sorry-”
“I’m so sorry, Harry-” You both spoke at the same time and chuckled.
“You don’t need to apologize.” He said, “I know you’d never do anything to hurt me on purpose.” He said and you nodded.
“Never, H.” You assured him and he smiled at your reassurance.
“So…what the hell happened?!” He asked through a chuckle and you groaned.
“Don’t make me relive it…” You whined, “You’re lucky that I didn’t jump off the rooftop then and there. It was mortifying.” You giggled and he tutted.
“I need to know!” He insisted and you groaned.
“H, I had a whole plan for the evening.” You muttered.
“Did you? You were gonna go out?” He asked and you shook your head.
“No, they were…homebody plans.” You said coyly and he smiled.
“Yeah? Walk me through the plan then.” He pressed and you bit your lip. 
“Mmm…was gonna smoke a joint…” you hummed and his eyebrows arched up as he smirked, “While listening to smutty stuff…and probably get off before just getting to bed.” you confessed and he bit his lip.
“Are you just trying to make this sexual?” He asked and you laughed and shook your head.
“No, I swear! I have a whole set up in my room.” You giggled and he knocked his head back as he laughed.
“Well, d’you mind if I distract you from your plans for a little bit?” He asked and you shook your head.
“Not at all.” You assured and he smiled, “Come on.” You said and grabbed his hand as you guided him through your townhome and to your bedroom. 
Harry saw the beautiful pink glow of your bedroom from down the hall. And he could also smell the delicious floral but warm and musky scent wafting from your bedroom. He inhaled deeply as he crossed the threshold and immediately went over to see the candles you had burning. He didn’t see a name apart from the brand on the vessel and as he glanced down to see if there was perhaps a lid close by he saw your vibrator plugged in and charging and he chuckled a bit, he had definitely intruded tonight. But maybe if things went well he could improve upon your plans. Normally, he would just go up and grab you if he wanted you and he was certain you wouldn’t object. But if he got to have sex with you tonight, he wanted to show you another side of what it could be like because of his feelings for you. You two were always fighting to keep the tender and loving bit out of your sessions, but he could still be kinky and sprinkle in the loving bits if you were open to trying for more with him.
“You really weren’t kidding.” He said and you turned back to see him pointing at your toy and sputtered on a laugh.
“I really wasn’t. It’s alright though, I can do that any other day.” You chuckled as he walked over and then plopped on your bed to slip out of his sneakers. “Ummm, do you want some of this?” You asked him, raising the joint and he nodded. “Okay, so I don’t have another seat to offer you, this is my designated smoking chair.” You explained to the bean bag sofa chair.
“You have a smoking chair?” He questioned you and you sniggered.
“I do! I don’t smoke often at all but I don’t want to stink up any of my nice furniture when I get the craving for it.” You explained and he hummed in amusement at your logic.
“I see…well, I can sit on the floor just get me a cushion for my bum.” 
“Okay.” You hummed and grabbed one of the round, velvet cushions you had as decor on your bed and set it beside the bean bag. You then settled in as he came over and with his foot, guided the cushion to the front of your seat. You glanced up at him and he smiled down at you.
“Open up.” He said and you parted your legs so that he could sit and nestle between them. Once he was comfy you leaned over him and handed him the joint and lighter. He sparked it up and took the first drag before handing it back to you, seconds later he was blowing the smoke out the large window and then you did the same. “So…how’d it happen?” He asked, bringing up your conversation from downstairs.
“Well, my friend Monty was hired as entertainment for the party and he asked me to tag in as the bassist and I agreed. I saw her from the stage at one point and smiled but she did not look pleased. So I decided to just not interact unless we were forced to because I didn’t want to stir up any trouble for you.” You explained.
“So you were forced to speak to her?”
“Yes! During the break in the set we both happened to walk up to the same bar line! Just my fucking luck, you know…?” you muttered as you recalled and he chuckled and turned around to face you instead so that you could converse better. “We said hello to each other and like…she seemed fine by then. Maybe it was stupid of me to ask how you were, but I was just making small talk because you’re the only thing we really have in common in terms of acquaintances.” you explained and he nodded, “And then she said that she’s sure I was nice but that she wanted me to stay away from you because she didn’t trust me.” You shared, his features turned down as he hummed in understanding, “And then she finished that with saying, “I know you slept with him”, that was it. Just like that.” You explained and his eyes widened. “Yeah!” You laughed nervously, as the feelings from that moment resurfaced again.
“Jesus…”
“I know…I was frazzled!” You exclaimed before taking another drag and handing the joint back to him. You held it in for a minute as he took his own drag, and then you blew out the smoke towards the window. “Just hearing it like that, in such a confrontational manner, I thought that meant that she knew-knew.” You said and he nodded, “So I just started apologizing frantically and assuring her that it hadn’t happened any more than those times and that you loved her, but I guess you told her something else because she looked really confused when I said that.”
“I just told her that we had been together before she and I were together, just about the one time before.” He said and you hummed.
“I’m sorry…I didn’t mean to fuck things up for you two. She just started to ask me how many times and when! And I was…so embarrassed and nervous and ashamed of myself.” You pouted and he reached for your calf and rubbed his thumb up and down your leg soothingly.
“I’m sorry, angel.” He replied. “I must admit I thought the worst at first, but then I just…I knew you’d never do that to me.” He said and you nodded.
“I wouldn’t, H. I know that it was a mistake and you were trying your best to not make the same mistake with me again-”
“Hey, look at me.” He said as he set the joint down on the ashtray you’d set out, “The only mistake I made was not choosing you from the very beginning. Even after the first time I was blown away by you. I was fucked from the start.” He said and your gaze softened, “I…I’ve felt things with you that I haven’t felt before. And while I…love that we’re compatible in the sex part of things, I’ve also given some thought to what things might’ve been like if we were together. And Y/N, I think it would be really good.” He said earnestly and you smiled softly at him. “Even just in the glimpses I’ve had of real life situations I’ve been in with you, I know we’re compatible in those parts too. You actually listen to me to understand me, not just to respond, you know? You think about me and consider me, even before yourself sometimes.” He said. “I know that…I haven’t done a lot of that for you previously, but I would like the opportunity to show you that I can do that for you and more.” He said and you smiled.
“To be fair, you did try, I just never let you before.” You added as you raked your fingers into his hair and he leaned into you, “I’ve also felt things with you that I’ve never felt before.” You confessed, “But it…scares me, H.” You confessed and he pouted a little bit, “Not because of you, but because of me. I fear that I would get lost in it.” You said and he smiled.
“Why is that a bad thing? I could get lost with you.” He mused and you giggled.
“We’re too old for that kind of thing, H.”
“Yeah, but that’s part of it, isn’t it? The honeymoon phase? Relishing in love without a care for what could befall us?” He asked and you smiled, “Get lost in love, in the excitement, in the sex…” he hummed with a grin, “That’s literally the best part.”
“It is…” you smiled in agreement.
“You know, when I think about you, I can’t imagine that the initial excitement will ever go away. We’d have so much fun together.” He said and you smiled.
“We would. But what about when things get…hard. Like when you’re touring or on other projects?” You asked and he thought about for a moment.
“We could be like Paul and Linda in WINGS.” He suggested with a small smile and you giggled, “No! Seriously! Hear me out…you could join the band! We could do all of it together, like Mitch and Sarah!” He said and you smiled, “Create, write, and perform…I know you’d love life on the road. And then just…do life together.”
“It does sound amazing.” You admitted with a smile.
“It does. And I know that I’m just out of a relationship, but things are a little bit different than just a normal breakup. We had something together and I want to explore it with you. I want to have the chance to make you happy how you deserve, angel. No more bits and pieces of attention and affection. If you give me your heart, I promise I’ll keep it safe.” He appealed.
You caressed his face gently, “My heart’s been yours for a while now, Harry. And even through all of this, I think you’ve done a wonderful job of protecting it.” You assured him. “I don’t want to ignore this anymore. I just feel so good when we’re together or even just in each other’s space.” You said softly. “You know, sometimes it feels like I’m connected to you in a certain way. Or maybe it’s my imagination…” you mumbled, excusing your ramblings. 
“We are.” He assured you, “I feel that too. It aches a little when we’re apart. And I just…sense it when you’re close by.”
“Yeah?” you smiled inquisitively and he nodded.
“Believe it or not, I was sitting out there for about half an hour, trying to decide if it was too bold of me to show up here unannounced. I had no idea if you were in or not. And then I suddenly felt this sense of urgency and came up to your door and here we are now.” He shared.
“Ummm, actually…when you arrived at the door I was about to go back to my room and just stopped at the front door for a few moments. I don’t know why, I just felt like I needed to. And then you rang the doorbell.” You shared with a smile, “Creepy, huh?” You asked.
“Mmm, I think it’s rather normal.”
“Being that in tune with another person is not normal.” You voiced your opinion, “I think it’s quite special.”
“I meant it’s normal for us.” He said and you grinned.
“Oh, then you’re 100% right.” You giggled and he smiled and leaned forward to kiss your knee through your pajama pants. You smiled down at him and when his eyes glanced up to meet yours again you sighed dreamily, “Just getting to be there with you is already way better than the plans I had made for myself.” You said through a giggle and he chuckled.
“Mmm…I think we could redirect things back to the original concept.” He smirked and you giggled but then your face turned serious.
“We don’t have to if you’re not ready for that. I’m not even horny or anything, was gonna build up to it with the spicy audios.” You confessed, “Although, well…seeing you definitely made me horny.” You chuckled bashfully, “So I am now but this is also good. We don’t have to if you’re not, you know…” You finished explaining.
“Oh, I definitely am, angel.” He chuckled, “Can’t help it when I’m around you.” He smiled, “But I…want to try something a little different this time.” He said and you nodded.
“Okay, what is it?”
“I wanna be more in my feelings while we do it.” He said and you bit your lip to suppress a nervous-excited smile.
“Umm…o-okay.”
“Okay. I’m just letting you know because…I know that we already get a little wild, but with my heart in it too, things could get a little bit more intense.” He warned you.
“That’s alright.” You nodded.
“And can I…ask you something?” He looked a bit nervous upon getting his request out.
“Of course.” You nodded.
“W-when I…degraded you and overpowered you or things like that, where I was…rough and harsh on you…” he started and you nodded, wordlessly communicating that he continue, “Did you do that for me? Like…did you agree to it like t-to please me. Because I like that or is it…well, was it for you too?” He asked.
“Of course I did it to make you happy but because I like it too.” You shared, “I like it quite a bit. Maybe a little too much.” You smiled as you shared.
“Do you think that…that means we’re…fucked up?” He asked, you could see he was feeling vulnerable for being self-conscious about it. 
In your opinion, the last place a person should be feeling ashamed in was in their sexuality. A person’s sexuality is such a vulnerable part of them, it reflects your deepest darkest fantasies, your id. It was the home of the libido according to Freud. And it could be a little kinky and perverted and maybe even a little scary to confront. But the beauty in that was that how well a person dominated that side of them, was a clear indicator of the amount of ego strength that person has. Which can only mean that a person has a very righteous and strong sense of conscientiousness, the superego. So in short, no, their preferences did not make them “fucked up”. It made them human. It made them normal. And indulging in that part of themselves in the appropriate setting helped them be able to flourish in all of the other roles they had in the world. Like being musicians, an uncle, a creators, a friend to others, a good person…
“Definitely not.” You said reassuringly. “Not if you don’t feel wrong for it.” You added, “Do you?” You inquired and he shook his head.
“It feels….liberating.”
“How so?” You asked with a smirk…you were ready to get started, “When you decide that you want to fuck me, what goes through your head?” He licked his lips and smiled slightly.
“Well I think,  I always get the things I want. And when I want that, when I want you, I just…take you. Because I can.” He smirked.
“So you’re selfish.” You grinned and he shrugged.
“I tend to be…one of my many flaws.” He smiled and you hummed.
“You know how I am…hyper independent. A control freak a bit…” you said and he nodded, “My instincts tell me not to be, to just take what comes my way…deep inside I know I’m actually powerless. And while it’s terrifying, there is something freeing about that. Because while it makes me vulnerable to really shitty things, I also makes me vulnerable to really wonderful things. Like getting bent over your hotel room bed with your cock in my pussy and your fingers in my ass…” You laughed and he did as well. “So, you give me what I need and I give you what you need, even the secret parts of us connect well. So yeah, it’s fucking freeing to be seen and understood on every level. We’re so fucking lucky to exist at the same time.” You said softly with a smile. 
Harry didn’t even hesitate to kneel up and smash his lips into yours. His kiss was ardent, heavy with affection and lust. Your tongues smeared together before he sucked your bottom lip between his lips. He gently bit into it, increasing his bite force bit by bit until you dug your nails into his shoulder. Your kiss simmered down from one second to the next and became so sweet. Just small and playful little pecks interrupted by giddy smiles and soft giggles and mumbles about starting to feel the weed. 
“The back of my knee is tickling!” You giggled and he sniggered, “Ughhh, scratch it please. Make it stop.” You requested and he pulled the leg of your pants up to be able to scratch the back of your knee, “Thank you.” You giggled and pecked his lips quickly. “Wanna get in bed?”
“Yeah, angel.” He mumbled and then he picked up the joint, “Let’s finish this off so that it feels extra nice.” He instructed as he sparked it up for you. “Want you to be a little easier for me.” He said and you smirked as he took his drag.
“Don’t need to be high to be easy for you.” You chuckled and he did as well and kissed you gently before shotgunning the smoke he’d exhaled into your mouth.
“Maybe not but it’s more this way.” He said before kissing you again and handing over the joint.
Once you’d finished it off you both stood and Harry started to undress you. He was getting your panties off when you handed the butt to him and he smashed it into the ashtray to properly extinguish it. He stood and then pulled you over to your bed, you happily plopped on it as he got undressed. He instructed you to grab your vibrator, so you crawled to the other side of the bed and unplugged it from the charger. Your pussy pulsed and fluttered in anticipation. You wanted to feel the silicone buzzing into your clit so badly, you were growing impatient and even more wet than before. You wriggled and rubbed your thighs together to get some friction going. Your labia glided together with ease from how aroused you were as you watched Harry undoing the buttons and fly on his jeans. You’d give anything to kiss down his abs and smooch down his happy trail until you got a mouthful of his cock. You moaned as you watched him pull down his briefs along with his jeans, his thick, long cock sprung up, wobbling about a bit from the sudden release. You licked over your lips. He watched you salivate over his cock, so he knelt onto the bed and put it in your face.
“Get me in your mouth then.” He mumbled and you immediately parted your lips and started to suck on the tip for a bit before starting to stroke the rest. His soft moans of pleasure were making your skin tingle, you’d missed the sound of him. And the weight of him on your tongue. And the taste of his skin, and it’s natural scent. “Fuck yeah, angel. Take more..I know you can take more.” He said as he pushed your head lower, letting himself dip his toe in the kinky forceful stuff you enjoyed for just a moment, “Shit!” He chuckled as his abs tensed, “Yes, baby…That’s fucking good, just…just wind it down for me. That’s it. Nice and slow, angel. Deeper…a little more.” He hummed and then groaned as he settled just a bit past the back of your mouth, you were holding back a gag, “Fuck, can’t believe how it all fits in there.” You couldn’t hold it back anymore and gagged around him which make him moan in pleasure, “Yeah, gag on it, angel.” He grunted and held himself in before gently pulling back to let you catch your breath. He did this a few more times until your chin was sticky with your drool and his pre-cum. “Is your little pussy throbbing yet?” He asked and you nodded as you wiped your mouth on the back of your hand. “Go wash up.” He said and you nodded and hurried to the ensuite to rinse off your face. 
He knew how much you hated to feel sticky in the face. You soon came back into the room to find him playing with the vibrator. He was clicking through the vibration patterns before he settled on half-note pulses and then pressed it to his frenulum. You stood and watched from the darkness of the bathroom, watching his brows crease and jaw clench as he pleasured his cock with the vibrating wand. He was a fucking masterpiece, and with you being a little high it was making you even more needy for him. You slowly approached and he glanced up to you.
“I think I need to get one of these.” He chuckled before biting his lip.
“Yeah, it makes me come like a fountain.” You shared through a chuckle and he groaned.
“Yeah?” You nodded, “Show me.” He said as he extended it towards you and you bit your lip nervously and climbed onto the bed. You settled into the pillows and he passed over the baby pink vibrator. He settled in beside you and kissed the top of your cheek. “Go on, then. Play with yourself.” He instructed and you didn’t need to be told twice. 
You spread your legs and slowly pressed the vibrator against your clit and immediately gasped. You were already sopping wet, so when you added more pressure it slipped a bit and Harry groaned as he watched you adjust a bit to get it back on your clit. He grabbed your thigh and pulled it open so that he could see you better. His mouth was watering as he watched you getting off, his fingers were itching to touch you in between your legs. He wanted to get down there and breathe you in and taste you until he had his fill of you. He only lasted a few more moments before he kissed you deeply and then shifted around until he was down between your legs and watching up close as your little cunt throbbed and oozed slick. He snatched the vibrator from your hand and shut it off as he delved in. He shook his head back and forth, wiggling to get his tongue in even deeper into your little hole. He wanted to taste everything you were giving right from the source.
“Oh fuck, Harry! Fuck yes, just like that!” You encouraged him as you ground up against his mouth. You were obsessed with the scratchy feeling of his facial hair pricking against your smooth pussy. And you loved how he held you open and licked from your entrance to your clit, flicking the sensitive little bud over and over with the tip of his tongue until you were gasping as your teetered on the edge of your orgasm. “I-I’m gonna come! Please, let me come!” You announced in a higher pitched voice, he hummed against you to signal his permission. Your muscles were completely tense as you held onto the feeling as long as possible until your first orgasm burst from inside of you.
Coming with his help was different. It was your quality of work without having to do any of the actual work. He read your body in ways that made it impossible for you not to give in. It felt so good to be free falling into that gratifying, warm, and tingly feelings. You loved how it tickled just right that it made your toes curl. And hearing him and feeling him moan into your leaking pussy made your eyes roll back before squeezing shut. You loved how he feasted on you. He was kissing your pussy as passionately as he’d kissed your mouth. You were just basking in how happy he was to be here with you. Your hips arched up as you tried to escape his mouth but he locked your thighs in his arms and held you down. It was getting to be too much! You hadn’t even had a chance to fully come down from your orgasm and you were already well on your way to another one. You were writhing and yelped as he nipped at your clit. He chuckled, knowing you didn’t mind a bit of pain. Just as you were about to get to a place where the tingles fully faded he parted his lips and sucked your clit between his lips. His tongue managed to just barely run over it, it was making your had spin. Your thighs were starting to tremble as he was forcing you past the point of no return.
“Harry!” You yelped as he sucked with more force, “Oh! It’s too much! Please! Please, no more!” You pleaded as he forced you down and open and kept sucking. “Fuck! Please, please!” You cried desperately as you writhed beneath him. Suddenly, the most obscene moan broke from your throat involuntarily as your hips and legs spasmed as you started to squirt. Your eyes squeezed shut as you arched up as the pleasure swept through your body. You were just about to come down from it when you heard the vibrator come on and then he was being held just over your clit, barely ticking the surface of your throbbing little bundle. You were panting now just whining pitifully as your little clit was vibrated so quickly. Next thing you knew, two of Harry’s fingers were sinking into your pussy and stretching you out. You swore your eyes crossed as he curved his fingers up and prodded at your g-spot a few times before you were moaning obscenely again as your cum gushed out of your entrance.
“Fuck yeah, angel. Squirt again for me. You can do it, baby. You can give me another one. One more for, daddy.” He grunted as he poured his fingers into you at a more determined pace until you were squirting a bit more for him. He eased into a stop before pulling his fingers out and sucking them clean and then leaning down to kiss you. “Mmm…you’re so perfect, baby. Look at you.” He mumbled in amusement, “I even missed how you taste.” He mumbled against your lips and you smiled and pecked his lips. “How are you feeling?”
“Good.” You replied with a soft smile.
“Promise? Went a little hard on you there.” He said and you nodded.
“Promise. I didn’t use our word.” You reminded him and he nodded.
“That’s right, angel.” He hummed.
“I actually have something in mind…” you started and he nodded, urging you to continue. “What if tonight we see if I can go under?” You asked and you saw the sparkle in his eyes but then he glanced away.
“Ummm…that’s kind of…opposite of what I wanted this time to be.” He admitted with a soft chuckle, “But if that’s what you want, then I-”
“Wait. No, tell me more about what you…were expecting or…hoping for?” You requested and he smiled slightly as he pressed down and kissed you again.
“Thank you for wanting to listen to it.” He said and you smiled and nodded, “Well…I know that before I had…kind of tested the boundary of what was too intimate er whatever. And well…I want to…fuck you with…intention and care and…I suppose…love?” He got out and sighed shakily, “I ummm…I am in love with you. I just…realized it. I’m sorry!” He laughed nervously as he looked into your eyes and you were just beaming. You pressed yourself up and grabbed his face and guided it towards your own until you were kissing slowly with smiles on your faces.
“H.” You mumbled.
“Yeah, baby?”
“Let’s do it your way. Lets add a little affection in there.” You whispered and he smiled.
“Okay.” He whispered back happily, “Do you have condoms?” He asked.
“Let’s not use one.” You said and he kissed you quickly.
“Are you one the pill again?” He whispered his question and you shook your head.
“No.” You reaffirmed verbally and he kissed you again.
“So you’re playing with fire, are you?” He asked and you nodded with a smile. “I really like that.” He hummed smugly. “Gosh, I’ll have to fuck you everyday until we find out you’re knocked up.” He said and you literally blushed as he grinned down at you smugly. “Would you like that, baby?” He asked you nodded quickly as he leaned down and kissed you as he reached down for his cock and positioned it at your entrance.
“Fuck, push it in.” You panted and he dropped his weight into his hips and surged forward until your little hole gave way and parted for his long, thick cock to sink in until his full, heavy balls thudded against your bottom. He ground his hips into you, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix and g-spot with every swirl of his hips until he pulled out and then sunk back in again. By the third one you were starting to tremble.
“That’s good for you, angel?”
“Yes…you feel so fucking good, baby!” You panted as you were brought to the edge and then let back down as he drew out from you. You were tingling in anticipation of feeling him thrust back in. “I love you so much…” you exhaled and he was suddenly feeling all warm and gooey inside.
“Fuck, angel, I love you too…I’m not gonna last too long.” He confessed as he froze deep inside of you. “Get your vibrator for me. Right on your clit. Wanna feel you coming on me one more time.” He said and you were quick to comply. You had it on a lower setting but given your sensitivity level you were starting to reach the edge quite quickly. Specially with Harry pounding away inside of you. You were moaning in time with the even paced grunts rumbling from his chest and the smacking sounds of your centers colliding over and over and over again. Your vision started to go hazy as you blinked up at him before your eyes squeezed shut as you started to come. You could feel your walls throbbing hard around his cock and you wanted nothing more than to feel his warm load filling your pussy.
“Come inside me, daddy!” You begged and he groaned and gave a few more determined thrusts before he was stilling deep inside of you, his hand pressing down on your tummy, you could feel the weight of him over his own cock inside of you. Something about that had you losing your mind and extended your orgasm as you felt him spilling into you.
“Fuck, baby…that’s all yours, angel. M’all yours. Take all my fucking cum.” He grunted deeply, you felt the deepness of his voice rumbling through your body as he ground into you with intent as he came deep inside of you. 
It stole your breath as you started to come again as both of your most vulnerable areas were being stimulated so gloriously. You didn’t mean for it to happen, but your vision started to tunnel and all the sounds around you were muffled as your head just rolled back and you closed your eyes and smiled as this gorgeous cocktail of THC, several orgasms, and sub space collided together in the most chaotic and serendipitous way. Your orgasm seemed to be affecting each of your main body parts one by one, you felt it in each leg, in your tummy, chest, and arms, and then your head. You were floating, you were living in ecstasy, riding the wave for as long as possible. You blinked your eyes open slowly as Harry rested over you and kissed you with tenderness when he saw you floating off in some warm and fuzzy place.
“You’re safe, angel. Safe with me. Love you so much.” He whispered as he kissed all over your face. You locked your legs around his hips, trapping his body against yours snugly, “Fuck yeah, baby. Keep me inside…” he moaned as your walls continued to pulse around him steadily.
  He held you nice and tight, keeping your warm under his body heat. It was then that you realized that you’d left the window opened…you hoped your neighbors hadn’t heard anything, but there was a very slim chance of that being the case. And just like that, the tingle feeling and tunnel vision started to fade and you were slowly descending back into reality. When you felt the strength return to your body, you hugged him back and he sighed happily as he planted another kiss to your cheek.
“Are you alright?” He asked lowly as he glanced down at you and you smiled and nodded. “Use your words for me, angel. Y’know that.” He reminded.
“Sorry, I’m still a little loopy.” You whispered, “But yeah, I’m alright. Just cold.” You said and he tutted.
“Forgot to close the window. Can I get up?” He asked and you shook your head.
“Not yet. Stay close.” You whined and he smiled as he pushed himself up a bit and ran his thumb over your kiss-bitten bottom lip affectionately. It was something small, but in the past you would’ve just let him go and it would’ve all been done. 
“Did you ever think about…being like this with me before?” He asked and you nodded.
“Of course. It just wouldn’t have been fair for either of us to give in. It feels so good to just…hold you.” You breathed out in relief and he smiled and kissed your lips quickly. 
“Yeah angel, it does.” He agreed as he smiled down at you.  
After a few more minutes of being cuddled up together, you felt more yourself again so you assured him that you could get up now so that you guys could get cleaned off and dressed again. He was helping you get your comforter and sheets off so you could switch them out. You watched him check your mattress really quick to ensure you hadn’t soiled it when you came so hard so many times. It was sweet and so endearing of him, it made you feel all soft for him and you weren’t ready for this to be over.
“D-do you want to stay?” You asked him timidly and his face lit up as he smiled and nodded.
“Wait.” He smirked, “Not gonna make me stay on my side of the bed, are you?” He questioned playfully and you laughed as you shook your head.
“I don’t think we need to have sides since I’m not sharing you with anyone else anymore.” You replied with a small grin.
“That’s…very fair.” He chuckled bashfully and you giggled.
“I’m just teasing.” You assured.
“I know, angel.” He smiled. 
“Do you wanna have a shower?” You asked and he nodded. You quickly changed your sheets and comforter before heading towards the shower. “We can share, just make sure you don’t get my hair wet.” You warned as you pulled him along.
You were soon nice and clean, the both of you shivering as you pleaded with him to go close the window once and for all. It wasn’t hard to persuade him, all it was was a flash of your boobs to have him dashing across your bedroom to shut the window and keep out the cold. You quickly got dried and dressed before you cuddled up into the bed. You were both shivering as you adjusted to the temperature. You kissed his chin, cheeks, and lips a few times. His arm was draped over your waist, fingers barely grazing over your lower back. There was something on your mind that you really just wanted to clarify with him. “H, so…earlier when you said you wanted the opportunity to…be more for me?” You trailed off and he nodded, “Did you mean that?” You asked and he nodded.
“I do. I want that with you.” He confirmed. “Do you want that with me too?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, I really do. I just umm…I have a doubt.” You explained and he frowned a bit.
“Look, I-I hope you know that…what we had, that’s not something I’ve done before.” He said and then he frowned a little bit, “Actually, I have cheated before…but it was just a drunken kiss with a random person on a night out and I came clean right away.” He rambled, “I felt awful about it. Still do! But I wouldn’t ever cheat on you. It’s not like a compulsion or anything like that, where I can’t control myself.” He continued rambling nervously. When you grabbed his face he blinked a few times and went silent.
“Hey, I trust you.” You said softly and his nervous gaze softened, “I made a choice too with you. What we had was not just your fault; sure you initiated but I didn’t turn you away. And while it was wrong, I mean, I can’t say it was a mistake because, honestly to me, being with you has never felt like a mistake.” You elaborated your point of view and he smiled upon hearing you say this to him.
“Do you…regret it?”
“Not really. I still find value in what we had before…I learned a lot about myself and what I’m capable of. I mean, I have also had a drunken kiss with a friend while dating someone else but I never really thought of that incident as cheating, I got carried away, you know? It wasn’t anything premeditated or that I thought of or even considered doing sober, so it was just opportunistic. I came clean the very next morning when I saw my partner and he didn’t think of it as cheating either. He actually…laughed in my face at that.” You recalled with a smile and he chuckled. “I guess my point is that, we’re all capable of less than savory things, but what matters is how we come out of it. And I think that what we did…it helped us to learn to trust each other in a way that we might not trust most people in our lives.”
“Yeah, that’s true.”
“Do you…feel regret for what we did?” You asked him.
“I think I did at some point, especially after your aunt’s birthday. I just saw how insecure I had made my ex feel, you know? But hearing you say that you don’t has changed my answer. I only regretted the fact that the situation was hurting everyone involved. Not the sex or the things we shared and the friendship and trust we strengthened through those times. I’m quite glad we had that with each other. But the fact that I wasn’t really treating either of you fairly or myself is my biggest regret.” He explained and you nodded in understanding. “Ummm, so if your doubts are not fidelity related what are they about?” He asked.
“Just about the timing of everything. Like, you just ended a relationship and I don’t want you to feel like you need to jump into anything with me right away t-to prove how you feel about me. Like if you need time to be single or something…like, I want you to know that that’s cool with me too.” You explained. Obviously, you wanted to jump in, you’d been waiting for him for so long, but if he wasn’t ready yet, then you’d wait, like you promised him a while ago.
“Well first off, I do want to be in a relationship. So I am ready for it. More than.” He assured you, “I just wasn’t with the right person before, that’s all. And well…I think we’ve both waited long enough for this opportunity to be together and if we both want it, why wait?” He reasoned and you bit your lip to try and suppress your smile. “What?” He chuckled.
“Nothing…I just umm…” you bit your lip and then readjusted yourself so that he was spooning you and then you interlocked your fingers with his. You relaxed almost immediately and let yourself melt into his warmth. “I’ve wanted you to hold me like this for a really long time.” You hummed happily. 
“So have I, angel.” He sighed before kissing the side of your head, “Thank you for waiting for me. You really didn’t have to.” He whispered and you smiled.
“Of course I did! I love you.” You whispered back, “That’s why I waited.” You explained with a smile.
“Oh, I love you so much.” He responded as he squeezed you a little tighter before kissing your head once again. You smiled in his embrace, relaxing more and more as the realization sunk in that this was your life now and you couldn’t have asked for a better outcome than this.
“Hey…” you whispered.
“What is it, baby?”
“You’re gonna keep this mullet thing you have going on for a bit, right?” You asked and he sniggered.
“If you like it that much then yes. I’d keep it for you.” He confirmed through a chuckle.
“Okay, good.” You hummed, “It’s fucking sexy.” You added softly and he grinned.
“You think so?” He chuckled.
“I certainly do.” You assured.
“Enough that if we got married I could have this hair, then?” He asked.
“Oh, for sure…so much so that they’d probably have to have the reception without us.” You said smugly.
“Baby…” Harry groaned, squeezing your hip just a bit and you smiled.
“You still have free reign you know…” you hummed and he hummed as he nuzzled up against your ear.
“You’re in for a long night, angel…” he hummed darkly.
“Do your best, daddy.” You grinned.
Magnetic extra^ (wc 2.4k)
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ashafox · 1 month ago
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mini doodle request: spaghetti
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generational-atrophy · 2 months ago
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OMG! I WAS LOOKING THROUGH UR BLOG CUZ MY HETALIA PHASE IS BACK AND WAS LIKE "I LOVE THIS WRITER SM WHERE ARE THEY" AND BOOM!
So request, if that's okay, the main 8 with a reader who cries during confrontations and or arguments. An imagine where ofc the main 8 says something hurtful and reader just covers their ears because 1.) Ears do be sensitive and 2.) It causes them to shut down completely
Can we know how they'd handle it plus how it'd go? Ty 💜
hetalia main 8 saying something they regret in an argument
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2.8k words ~ gender neutral headcanons
tw: they say hurtful things, and are kind of assholes in general lol
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America - Alfred F. Jones
“I’m better than this. Why’d I keep someone as seriously uncool as you around?!”
Even as you immediately begin turning away from him, curling into yourself for comfort, Alfred would be less than sympathetic. If you’d ever doubted how self-centred he could be, this was more than enough evidence to prove it.
“What? What- just- don’t do that! You’re the one who started this!”
It’s unlikely he’d let up even after the tears start. He’s really that callous when he feels hurt. After a few tense minutes of silence broken only by your quiet whimpering, he’d start tearing up too. Not from guilt, seeing how much he hurt you. But instead from how he’s only now realizing he has to put his own feelings aside to take care of yours.
He’d approach you like a rabid animal, a lump stuck in his throat as he tries to say anything to get you talking again.
“Listen, it’s uh- not that serious. I’m sorry, ok? Let’s just… like- do something else?”
His comforting consists mostly of trying to get you out of your own head. Once it’s been long enough that you’re less scared, he’d take your hands away from your ears gently and kiss your cheek. If you’re sensitive to other things, he’d wrap his jacket around your shoulders and turn off the lights until you’re up and talking again.
“See? Not that hard, just like I said. Good job, babe…  let’s just keep going like this, yeah?”
Somewhere, past all of the self-absorption and pride, he does have a heart. And that heart will immediately take you out to get ice cream. It’d take him a while to admit fault (and I mean real responsibility, not just his usual “sorry not sorry, move on,” schtick,) but maybe once your tear stains have dried, he’d realize what an ass he’d been.
England - Arthur Kirkland
“G*d, you’re pissing me off already! Just- fuck- get out of here if you hate us so much!”
Like usual. He’s desperate to just leave as soon as there’s conflict. It may be annoying, but at least he’s only doing it because he knows how awful he is when frustrated. 
If you don’t take up his offer to abandon the conversation, he will. You’d have to be seriously struggling to keep him with you in that moment.
“Trust me, everything will be much, much worse if I stay…”
He’s always acting like that. It’s like his conscience disappears when he speaks, but only returns when he’s already said the hurtful thing. Never taking responsibility, always panicking and leaving just as your tears start to fall.
But, the more you tell him how much that hurts, the more he might be willing to stay.
It’ll take him a while to be able to choke out a cowardly “sorry,” but at least he’ll stop trying to push you away at every occasion.
“Wait- don’t cry so much love, I’m- I… I didn’t mean it. Ok? Is that better?”
It’s impossible for him to keep arguing once you’re truly upset. Instead, he’ll take you by the hand to the kitchen so he can start making tea for the two of you. In that silence, he encourages you to speak whatever awful thoughts you’re repeating to yourself. He’s just trying to get you in a comfortable environment again at that point.
Quiet affirmations are the only things he’ll bring, looking at you sympathetically and still holding your hand tight while you talk about whatever you want to. Whether that be something completely random, insults towards him, or actual constructive discussion is up to you.
At the end of the night, he’ll apologize. Not well, mind you, but enough to dissuade you from whatever hurt you earlier. All that matters to him is that you don’t go to bed upset.
“I’ll do better next time… or- I mean- I’ll do my best to… not be like that… again. Promise.”
France - Francois Bonnefoy
“But is it that impossible for you to put in some effort? It’s just… embarrassing to be with you right now!”
He’s always been a fighter for sport. When he argues with you, it’s not to prove a point. It’s probably not about anything he actually cares about either. He honestly just does it for fun. To him, arguing is how you really get to know someone.
So when you take his words to heart and, in the worst case, start crying, he just really doesn’t know what to do.
“Merde, darling, you know I wasn’t being serious! Come on now, don’t take it so personally…”
He may grumble about how he didn’t want you to get so upset, but at least he’ll still calm down and quit pushing you. Whatever tension there was before will dissipate as soon as he sighs, making his way over to you and wrapping you in his embrace. Unless that makes you even more uncomfortable, in which case he’ll just grab your favourite blanket and gently drape it over your shoulders.
“I am so sorry I made you so upset, I really didn’t mean it. You’re wonderful to me, always so stunning!”
For as long as you need him to, he’ll apologize over and over again, playing with your hair and wiping away your tears as delicately as he can manage. He may be just as upset as you are when he realizes what he did, but he’s shockingly good at compartmentalizing that when you need support.
But, if you focus too much on how he hurt you, he might start crying too. He can’t help it. Ignore him.
Either way, he’s there to hold you and validate you in whatever you might be feeling at that moment. Be as irrational as you need to be,  he understands the urge well. And either way, he’ll just nod along to anything you say and insist it’s everyone else's fault. Including his, unlike basically every other man.
“How can you expect to survive when you hold all of this in? Please, always come to me even with small things, we share everything as lovers, yes? I cannot bear to see you as upset as this…”
China - Yao Wang
“Can’t you act your age? How do you expect anyone to put up with you like this?!”
As soon he says it, he knows that was an awful thing to say. He doesn’t need you to tell him, he can tell just by your expression that it was too far. You didn’t deserve that, he told himself.
But that doesn’t mean his ego is gonna let him give in so easily. Even if he was an ass, he still can’t let himself give up “authority” in a fight.
“Agh- that’s not… its not what I mean to say, alright?! So just… pretend I did not….”
If you quit fighting, instead becoming more upset, he’ll really struggle to calm down instead. Like, yes, he knows he should be trying to make you feel better, but that’s- he just doesn’t want to! He entered this fight with a purpose, and just because you’re crying doesn’t make that purpose any less important!
“Why won’t you argue back?! Aiyah, I knew you were childish but-”
Then he cuts himself off. Does he want to be the bigger person and apologize? No. But will he do it if you stop crying? Yes.
He’ll rest a hand on your arm and suggest in the gentlest voice possible that the two of you should go for a walk. Maybe the fresh air will help both of you clear your heads. He doesn’t know what must’ve happened to him to make him say all of those things either.
“I don’t think those thoughts, tiánxīn. I’m sorry I said it, I was upset but… I still should have known better.”
For as quickly as he’s willing to take responsibility, he’s not as much good at the “getting you out of breakdown” stage. Hopefully, you’ve already communicated with him about that so he knows to stop being so loud and trying to touch you. He’ll do whatever you request of him, but what’s best for you in that moment is probably not his first instinct.
“I’m sorry I was being such a huge ass. I love you, I promise.”
Russia - Ivan Braginsky
“You think you are special? I can beat sense into you just like I can them!”
Good luck getting him to understand that you can’t just threaten people within the next few hours. It will not work. When he’s angry, he really doesn’t care about feelings. Just about getting you to cooperate with whatever he says.
He may usually think of both of you as equals, but when you start seriously challenging his authority while he’s in a bad mood, it’s impossible for him to not be cruel. It’s always just better to leave than let him spiral and hurt both of you in the process
Although, he (obviously) would never actually put his hands on you. He just acts like a big baby and’ll stomp his feet and tell you whatever will get the most reaction out of you.
“Любимый, won’t you come out? I’m very sorry, I promise… can’t we just talk?”
But if you do remove yourself from the situation, he would never chase after you and force you to keep being in that awful environment. He knows better than that at least.
The moment you turn away and refuse to engage with his childishness, he’s already planning how to get you to forgive him. For as callous as it seems, your disapproval hurts him more than anything else. He would come to you on his knees, snivelling and pleading,  if that was what he had to do just for you to look at him again
The moment you let him in though, he just rushes over and captures you in his arms. He would dry your tears as gently as he could, treating you like you were made of glass.
“Куколка, куколка, you know I never mean any of that, right? I’m sorry, sorry, please- please, forgive me? If I kiss it better, will you forgive me, любимый?”
He’s so pathetic. Ask anything of him in this state and he’ll do it without hesitation. Unless it’s staying away physically. He’ll be quiet and let you ignore him but don’t try to push him away or he’ll get whiney. If you stress that it isn’t personal enough, maybe he’ll let it go though.
North Italy - Feliciano Vargas
“Why aren’t I good enough? You always abandon me, like-  like I’m nothing! Why do you hate me!?”
The moment either of you pick a fight, he’s already sobbing. Sure, he can argue with his brother for hours, but you matter to him in a much more vulnerable way. If you’re at all upset with him, he instantly feels like you don’t like him any more.
But when he feels attacked, he attacks just as much. In his subconscious, it’s always easier to push you away than have you abandon him yourself. That doesn’t result in very productive conversations, though.
“You’re just pretending you love me! You’re a liar, I- I know it!”
When you start crying along with him from all the awful things he’s said, two things can happen.
One, he cries harder, interpreting your hurt feelings as being an admittance to what he accused you of. Why would you be crying if it wasn’t from guilt, and why’d he say that when he so dreaded it being true?!
Or two, you’ll tell him about how truly terrible it feels to have him think those things about you, and he’ll snap out of it. His overwhelming emotions make him incredibly selfish at the moment, so he truly hadn’t considered how you felt from all of that.
Then he immediately lowers his voice, giving you plenty of space until you feel up to talking again. 
“Oh… I’m sorry! I didn’t- you wouldn’t do that! I know that, you know that, so just- I’m sorry! Please, forgive me, amore mio dolce!”
He pulls you into a hug immediately, keeping the two of you as close as physically possible as he whispers promise after promise of his love. Until your tears dry, he won’t stop strangling you with unabashed affection, doing anything he can just to get you smiling again.
The feeling of guilt is not something he’s used to. It’s not out of the realm of possibility that he’ll start crying again too.
“If I ever make you feel bad again, please shut me up, please! I can’t take the thought of you so hurt by my words!”
Germany - Ludwig Beilschmidt
“My word should be more than enough for you to shut up already!”
It’s exceedingly rare that he ever loses his temper around you like that. Normally, you’re the one thing that can always calm him down. Just looking at your face makes his chest fill with butterflies, drowning out whatever dark thoughts he’s having.
So, needless to say, he immediately regrets snapping at you. Immediately.
“Wait, no- no, I didn’t mean to say that. I didn’t mean to. It’s not true, just- just stupid, I’m sorry, liebling…”
Whatever you two were arguing about is instantly forgotten as he rushes over to you and takes your face in his hands. It just breaks his heart to see you hurt, much more at his own actions. You don’t have to worry about him taking responsibility, he would never try to dodge the guilt of making you cry.
It’s not the first time he’s lost control, and he knows it’s his fault. But maybe if he takes you in his arms gently enough, rocking you back and forth as you cry into his shoulder, it’ll make it a little easier for you.
But if you just need a silent moment to yourself, that’s perfectly fine too. He’s autistic, so he certainly understands the feeling and will happily provide you with whatever comforting items you request.
“I’m sorry… you didn’t deserve what I said. I love you, please tell me you know that…”
Even if you pretend you weren’t that upset by it, Ludwig wouldn’t let it go like that. If he gets to his breaking point like that, whatever fight you were having is put aside for the night. Now all that matters to him is that the two of you make up and get back into how things were before as soon as possible.
Expect him to be beating himself up for a while though. He just wants you to know how sorry he is, how much he regrets snapping at you, even if it does seem a bit excessive. But he’s just had too many people he cared about leave to not make a whole thing out of it.
Japan - Kiku Honda
“Don’t you have any sense of personal space? You are like- choking me with all of… you! I can’t stand it!”
He’s a logical man. That’s one thing he always tells himself. Never, not even when he’s emotional, does he say things he doesn’t mean. Was the way he said it less than perfect? Yes, of course, he can’t believe he had just acted so impolitely, especially to someone who he cares so much for. But he still… meant what he said.
But, for the first time, as he watches your face break slowly, he’s not so sure of himself. Whether he meant it or not seems suddenly so inconsequential compared to the thought of hurting you. He… upset you? That wasn’t supposed to happen.
“Ah- why are you crying? What is wrong? You… you- it will be… alright, you know? You are ok!”
Wait- no, don’t cry more from that! He has absolutely no idea how to comfort you, but if he really has to, he’ll do his best. Although it’s a little difficult for him to resist drawing your hands away from your ears, he’ll do his best to just let you have your process (no matter what that means for you.)
Before you can even hear him coming closer, you’re suddenly drawn into an intimate hug. His hand drawing your head underneath his and kissing the crown of your head so lovingly, it's almost like another person possessed him as he turns so soft just at the sight of your tears
Would his pride usually reject this? Yes, but, it’s certainly not the first time he’s had to put that aside for you.
He’ll sputter generic apologies, purposefully hiding his grimace as he forces himself to forget about whatever you two were arguing about before. Well, at least for now. Most likely he’ll bring it up not long after, but in a much more… non-confrontational way.
“Let us go do something else instead, hm? You’ll only get more upset like this, and I want that as little as you want it.”
On one hand, he’s a little annoyed he had to put aside his own gripes to calm you down. But on the other hand, he hates conflict. Anything that gets you guys back to normal is worth it, especially if otherwise you’ll be crying in his arms. That’s his absolute nightmare.
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chanelnumbermine · 6 months ago
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too hot to handle | paul aron x fem!reader
summary: the hot italian summer proves challenging for all the wrong reasons. testing your self-control around paul has never been harder
warnings: none, suggestive content.
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having been from estonia, a country forming part of the nordic states, one of the colder places in europe, paul treasured every drop of sunlight a day gifted him. he didn't mind getting sunburnt, never complained about the heat and never missed a chance to tease you about your hatred for the sun. so when he offered you a place on his yacht for a cruise around the mediterranean, you were reluctant to accept. paul was an extremely active person, some would say his energy could rival an eager puppy. always swimming, running around the boat to adjust the course, laughing about something with his friends.
you were complete opposites. when he brimmed with excitement to climb a mountain and watch the sunset from the peak, you dreamed of a lazy evening. when he wanted to explore another island, you were craving ice cream to battle the excruciating temperature. he was sunbathing on the boat deck and you were swimming in the sea. it wasn't about your lack of energy or lack of interest in spending quality time with your best friend. it was quite the contrary.
paul had a certain affinity - or lack thereof - for shirts. being a young man confident in his body his outfits consisted of him wearing swimming trunks or short shorts, exposing his muscular chest and strong arms. even the slightest of moves made his muscles flex and he wasn't shy about showing it off. which was fun for him, but considerably less for you. sure, he was a sight for sore eyes. and you couldn't help but stare.
it was wrong, you kept telling yourself. to look at your best friend and think of tracing the tan lines, moving your nails along his muscles, feeling his warm body tensing underneath your touch. to feel his arms tighten around your frame and inhale the scent of his hair, wet from the salty water. to run your hand through his curls, caressing his face, from his cheekbones, to the swollen pouty lips to his strong veiny neck. and, well, with each passing day it was getting harder to control yourself. whereas paul was getting bored of the usual tasks and was increasingly frustrated with your demeanour. the harder you pushed him away, the harder he pulled. and today was the day he has had enough.
you left breakfast early. dressed up in your favourite bikini and dove into the sea. jumping far into the water, the cold enveloping your body, taking away the burning from your skin and the unnecessary thoughts from your head. you dove deeper, treading the waves until you were out of breath. were you running away? maybe. just for a second. usually nobody bothered to disturb your morning swim, but today a tall figure was standing on the edge of the deck, his body corded and a shadow of a smile lingering on his lips. unbeknownst to you, paul was been following your every move.
he dove into the water and quickly caught up with you. pushing through the waves, he swam under your body and reappeared just in front of you. "hey." he said and put his hands on your shoulders, stopping you in your tracks. you yelped ans tried to push him away, water in your eyes blinking you, the sudden contact unsettling you. his voice did little to calm you, unleashing a bunch of butterflies in your stomach. but his grip proved too strong. you pushed your knee against his chest, hoping to overpower him. he just moved his palms to your lower back and your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist.
your voice died in your throat. "hey." you said weakly, as his eyes bore into your skull. lost in the moment, you failed to notice how close your bodies became. his hands almost on your hips, your lips millimetres away from kissing his forehead. your crotch rubbing against the rubber band of his swimming trunks. his head buried in the valley of your breasts. but he was staring right into your eyes.
"you're not easy to get hold of, you know?" he complained, breathless. you wanted to throw your head back, scream, bury your face in his chest. whatever, as long as you wouldn't have to stare into his puppy eyes. you were glad for the water surrounding you, as he couldn't feel how sweaty your hands were becoming and couldn't hear the blood rushing through your veins. so you just swallowed and smiled awkwardly. "what do you mean?" he moved his right hand to the center, the other one now holding your thigh.
he sighed. "really, now!” a wave trashed on to back, the water dripping on his curls and getting in his face. you chuckled and moved it to the side. he murmured a soft thank you and looked up at you again. "just missed you, that's all" he admitted bashfully, which made you to laugh softly. that was paul's charm. not the flirty demeanour nor the confidence when he drove a car. it was moments when his facade cracked and the he laughed innocently. how you loved that laugh. so you did what you weren't supposed to do. you leaned forward and pressed a kiss onto his forehead.
when you leaned back and saw the shock in his eyes, you panicked. let go of his body and tried to swim away as far as humanly possible. you kicked him softly in the stomach. your cheeks and eyes were burning. the embarrassment being spread through your bloodstream instead of oxygen. god, what the hell was that? you wanted to swim to the bottom of the sea and bury yourself in the sand and never face paul again. you swam with all your might, driven by adrenaline and remaining pride.
the poor blonde barely collected himself, fighting for every breath, struggling to piece together what just happened. and he couldn't. with you out his sight, his hands empty, thoughts rushing through his head. he bit his lip, looking around for the familiar figure. he gasped, finally seeing your head resurfacing meters away. he didn't think twice, he started chasing you again. he was trembling with emotions, his eyes lost. he caught you ankle and wrapped his hands around your frame tightly. you didn't fight back. just laid your head on his shoulder. "im sorry" you whispered.
your breath tickled his neck, he laughed quietly. he tilted his head so it was resting on top of yours. "you scared me, now" paul pressed a small peck into your hair. "can't promise i won't do it again, darling" the nickname made you shiver and you slowly pulled away from him. he pressed his lips together and looked into your eyes, panicked you would get away again. so he did the only thing he could think of looking at your flushed cheeks and watering eyes.
he kissed you. breathless and scared, full of unspoken desires and muted feelings, he kissed you. as if it was the first kiss in his life. this time it was him who pulled away quickly, swallowing his pride and groaning internally. you were shaking. "fuck, im sorry" his voice broke "i don know wha-" he didn't manage to finish the sentence, because your lips crashed into his again. latching onto his lower lip hungrily, your teeth grazing his tongue when he kissed you back, invading your mouth. your hands on the sides of his face, his fingers buried in your hair. your could feel the salt on your tongue, was it the water, your tears? you pulled away when it became hard to breathe.
“i don’t feel sorry at all now”
“neither do i”
masterlist
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flaneuresse · 9 months ago
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rome by jessica on Flickr.
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selin-n · 3 months ago
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Travel, italy
Bir ufka vardık ki artık, Yalnız değiliz sevgilim.
Gerçi gece uzun,, Gece karanlık
Ama bütün korkulardan uzak.
Bir sevdadır böylesine yaşamak
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vanteguccir · 12 days ago
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── ୨୧ ! PRADA FW25 | INSTAGRAM
matt sturniolo x prada!model!reader
SUMMARY: Where Y/N goes to the Prada FW25 show with the triplets and enjoy Milan with her boyfriend, Matt.
WARNING: None.
REQUESTED?: No.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism, copy, or "inspiration"! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
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liked by sturniolofan1, matthew.sturniolo, ynfan72 and 1,528 others
people Supermodel Y/N L/N spotted today in Milan!
view all 3,065 comments
username wait you're lying??? she's actually there???
username IS SHE GOING TO THE PRADA SHOW OMG PLS
username lmaoooooo i see you hiding in the likes matt
username it’s so cute that he's always following her activities 🥹🥹
username she's so freaking gorgeous how's that possible???
username PRADA GIRL IN MILAN?? SHES SO MOTHER RN
username nah bc how can someone look this good just walking???
username I so hope that she comes back to the runways on prada's next woman's show 😔
username I'm obsessed omg omg omg
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liked by lilamoss, matthew.sturniolo, sturniolo.triplets and 11,628 others
ynsinstagram milano, your queen is here 🇮🇹🤌🏻
tagged: matthew.sturniolo
view all 3,065 comments
username um so like you’re actually perfect
username ughhhhh milan is so beautiful 😭
→ username ikr?? I dream of going there someday
username my jaw dropped but I'm happy about it
matthew.sturniolo love the shirt
→ ynsinstagram really??? it's my face in there 🥺
⤷ matthew.sturniolo actually I was talking about MY face in there
⤷ username I LOVE THEM LMAO 😭😭
username NO WAY, IS THAT REALLY MATT????
→ username OBVIOUSLY ???? the guy follow his girl everywhere 😭
⤷ username it's so crazy to think that he's in Italy right now
username matt flew to MILAN for his girl?? boyfriend of the year award goes to him fr
username you're everything mama, I adore you etc etc, but also like... MATT IS IN MILAN?? AS IN MY CITY???
username THIS IS Y/N'S WORLD AND WE'RE JUST LIVING IN IT
christophersturniolo 🏰🤌🏻🥧😱
→ ynsinstagram I agree, king 🙌🏻
username are nick and chris also there?
→ username I don't think they're (?)
→ username probably... this week is gonna happen the prada FW25 show, maybe she's in Milan to go there? her being the face of prada and all
⤷ username this actually makes super sense
username where Y/N is, fashion is following 🙌🏻
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liked by sturniolo.triplets, ynsinstagram, prada and 8,528 others
matthew.sturniolo this is what happens when you date a supermodel, they make you look cool by association
tagged: ynsinstagram
view all 3,925 comments
username damn god really out here choosing favorites
username he loves her your honour
username matt's milan era is just him third-wheeling Y/N and the camera
→ username FRRR!!! that girl looks amazing in every picture 😭😭
christophersturniolo bro really said I'm a prada boy now
→ ynsinstagram and he's slaying it 💅🏻
username sir, how does it feel to be living half of the world's dream?
→ matthew.sturniolo unreal
username nah bc prada matt is actually gonna break the internet rn
ynsinstagram you're cooler 🫵🏻🤍
→ matthew.sturniolo impossible
username this is the most unexpected collab but I'm OBSESSED
username HE LOOKS SO GOOD IN PRADA LIKE HELLO????
nicolassturniolo how do you pull a supermodel and still look like you can't spell milan?
→ matthew.sturniolo I think you mixed the triplet
⤷ christophersturniolo what's that supposed to mean???
username I'm SO sure that Y/N influenced matt 100% to buy prada stuff
username and now everyone say THANK YOU Y/N 🙏🏻
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liked by sturniolo.triplets, matthew.sturniolo, ynsinstagram and 6,279 others
gettyimages MILAN, ITALY - 19TH JANUARY. The Sturniolo's arrive at the Prada fashion show during Milan Menswear Fall/Winter 2025.
tagged: sturniolo.triplets
view all 3,624 comments
username WHAT THE FUCK
username what do you mean they're aLL IN THAT PRADA SHOW???? am I dreaming?
username omg omg omg omg shut up right now this is EVERYTHING
username PRADA KINGS 🙏🏻🙏🏻
→ username Y/N being their prada queen 🙏🏻
username I'm so so proud of them 😭
username fuck matt is looking amazing in all black 🫦🫦
username WHERE’S Y/N??????
→ matthew.sturniolo that's a good question
⤷ username LMAO 😭 noticed by matt being ironic
username can't wait to see them in the front row
username weren't they in boston just yesterday? 😭😭 things happen so fast omg
username they're the moment guys ✋🏻✋🏻
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liked by matthew.sturniolo, bellahadid, kendalljenner and 17,279 others
ynsinstagram MILANO IS PRADA @/prada
tagged: prada
view all 8,624 comments
username fashion princess is living the dream so happy for her 😭🙏🏻
username mommy- sorry... mommy- sorry... MOTHER
kendalljenner you are GLOWING 😍
→ ynsinstagram love you, ken 🤍
username THE FACE OF PRADA ARRIVES, EVERYONE ELSE CAN GO HOME
prada prettiest
→ ynsinstagram 🖤
username she is literally making the streets of milan her runway rn
username stop, you're making me wish that she comes back to the runways 😭😭
matthew.sturniolo nah bc how does someone look THIS good just stepping out of a car?? unreal
nicolassturniolo stop drooling
username prada is lucky to even exist while Y/N is wearing it tbh
bellahadid it's giving movie from the 50s
→ ynsinstagram STOP I LOVE THIS
username icon of the century
username here, take my whole house if you want
username 💳💳💳
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liked by ynsinstagram, matthew.sturniolo and 3,528 others
prada Y/N L/N and the Sturniolo Triplets attend the Prada FW25 Menswear Show in Milan, at the Fondazione Prada's Deposito.
tagged: ynsinstagram, sturniolo.triplets
view all 665 comments
username nick, chris, and matt are living every fan's dream rn just casually at PRADA with Y/N
→ username idk who I want to be tbh 😫
username ughh they look so powerful wtf
username the fact that prada is literally being carried by THEM rn 😫😫
username Y/N's outfit is literally what dreams are made of
→ username ikr??? so angel coded
username can we talk about how matt's whole outfit is lowkey giving runway vibes?? boyfriend is LEVELING UP
→ username and for that we say THANK YOU Y/N 🙌🏻
username Y/N's accessories alone probably cost more than my whole apartment but like... worth it 😃
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liked by rosiehw, matthew.sturniolo, haileybieber and 14,528 others
ynsinstagram cause i love to love, to love, to love you 🤍
tagged: matthew.sturniolo
view all 7,365 comments
matthew.sturniolo that guy's pretty handsome
→ ynsinstagram very :) and an amazing photographer too
⤷ matthew.sturniolo with a muse like you, I have no doubts
⤷ username PARENTS ARE FLIRTING ‼️
username MY ROMAN EMPIRE
username how can you both be so damn hot?!
username they're the IT couple
username the way she's casually flexing that matt does her cartier for her like we're not all crying rn 😭
username he's so boyfriend material fuck 😭
nicolassturniolo cool pics and all, but where's my invite to the pasta tho?
→ ynsinstagram as if you didn't obligated us to bring some for you
⤷ username LMAO 😭😭 this is so nick coded
username EVERYONE PAUSE
username I want what these bitches have ;(
username she's truly one of the most beautiful women i've ever seen 😭
username omg he was taking pics of her??
→ ynsinstagram yes 😁
→ matthew.sturniolo always!
⤷ username WTF- HIIIII
⤷ username YOU'RE BOTH SO CUTE STOP
username why am I crying in the club rn
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liked by ynsinstagram, nathandoe8, tarayummyy and 12,588 others
matthew.sturniolo pizza in italy just hits different
tagged: ynsinstagram
view all 3,745 comments
username are yall breathing ok??
→ username no, actually going to the hospital rn
username bro went from youtube videos in sweatshirts to prada boy real quick
→ username AND I'M SO HERE FOR ITTTT
→ username don't you dare insult his sweatshirts 😔😔
nicolassturniolo matt driving in italy? 😱😱😱
→ matthew.sturniolo I can actually drive everywhere when I have a license, yk?
⤷ username clocked out 😭
username Y/N give me a chance pls pls pls
username fourth pic is peak boyfriendism 😭
username sooooooo dreamy omg I need this
username luckiest boy on the planet
→ ynsinstagram luckiest girl*
⤷ matthew.sturniolo nah, I win on that note, no one is luckier than me
⤷ username whipped
ynsinstagram 🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕
→ matthew.sturniolo 🍕🍕🍕🍕
⤷ username best conversation ever
username I NEED IT I NEED IT
username matt's prada era AND his soft boyfriend era at the same time???
→ username and we all say THANK YOU Y/N 🙌🏻🙌🏻
tarayummyy every time you post her, my heart grows three sizes ;((( stop being so perfect
→ username we love a supportive bestie 😔
ynsinstagram italy has my heart and so do you, mio amato 🤍
→ matthew.sturniolo I promise I'm keeping it safe here 🖤
⤷ username I'm gonna throw up- THIS IS SO CUTE SHUT THE FUCK UP
username Y/N taking a picture of matt taking a picture of her 🙏🏻🙏🏻
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563 notes · View notes
finelinevogue · 8 months ago
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to new beginnings
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summary - you and harry are drunk on the streets of rome
word count - ~1k
pairing - husband!harry x reader
✨☀️💛☀️✨☀️💛☀️✨☀️💛☀️✨☀️💛☀️✨
“It’s literally this way.”
“No it isn’t.”
You tugged on Harry’s hand, attempting to make him follow you down a road - that looked like an alley - that you were sure would lead you to the main square.
Harry was insistent you were going the wrong way, but who could actually tell when you were both as drunk as each other.
Harry stood still as he watched you were drunk eyes and a soft smile, as you tried to tug him your way.
“Haarryy!”
“Y/NN!”
“Come on! I know what I’m doing.”
“No you don’t. You’re sloshed!” Harry laughed, watching you spin around in circles for whatever reason.
“I’m not sloshed… I’M IN LOVE.” You shouted to the universe, and also the unfortunate old couple that just happened to be walking past at the same time.
Before you could apologise, the old man spoke; “I remember when we were like that, Carla.”
You smiled warmly, looking from them to Harry. Harry was already smiling towards you, that spark still in his eyes for you even after 5 years together.
5 years together but only 2 days of being married.
Marriage was pretty happy so far.
“We still are.” The old woman smiled at her husband as they passed by.
You continued to walk off then, walking down the road you wanted to go down.
It was a very small and quaint alley, lots of balconies with hanging green baskets and drying clothes. You looked up at them as you passed by, your trainers padding along on the cobbled floor as you walked.
As you were in your own little world, you didn’t hear Harry sneak up on you until his arms were around your waist and lifting you up in the air to spin you around.
“Harry!” You laughed, your jaw hurting from smiling so much.
“Will you ever learn to listen to me?” He bit playfully onto your exposed shoulder, where the thin strap of your dress lay.
“Never!”
“Is that how marriage works? You being in charge?”
“Obviously.”
He safely set you on the ground and you brushed your dress-skirt down, before twirling around and throwing your arms around his neck.
“What?” He asked, smiling down at your happy face.
“I’m in charge.” You tried to say seriously, but you were too drunk to be in complete control of your face.
“Okay.” Harry gave in, kissing your forehead.
“No, I am. I really am.”
“I know.”
“That means I can control you to do loads of things for me.”
“Oh yeah? Like what?” Harry asked, even though he was ready to say yes to everything.
“Umm, buy me flowers every day.”
He kissed you then, “Done.”
“Okay,” You blushed, “Hmm. Come on beach walks with me every weekend - no matter how far from the coast we are.”
He kissed you again then, “Yup.”
“Uhh what about…”
Kiss. Kiss. Kiss. “Yes, yes, yes. Yes to anything and everything. Boss me around all day everyday, I don’t care as long as you’re happy, my love.”
“I am. Very happy.”
You leaned up to kiss him properly then, showing him just how much you love him. You scrunched the small hair on the back of his neck and pulled him closer, moving in tandem with each other like you’d known each other a lifetime not only five years.
You pulled away first but quickly moved to kiss his jaw and leading down his neck, kissing and nipping at the skin to give him a hickey.
“Babe… No!” Harry laughed, knowing how much you loved giving him hickeys but never somewhere everyone could see.
“Nooooo.” You whined as he pulled your head away from his neck.
“Baby, you’re drunk and I’m drunk but I know we’re going to be mad at each other if you give me a public hickey. So be good and stop.”
You scrunched your face up in pretend anger.
“You’re annoying.” You kiss him on the lips once more.
“So are you.”
“That’s not very nice.” You feigned shock.
“Aww, are you sad?”
“Don’t taunt me.” You rolled your eyes.
“Lemme kiss you to make up for it.” Harry leaned in to kiss you but you shoved your hand on his face and pushed him away before he could.
You laughed as he pretended to be hurt by your action, but you ran off down the road before he could say or do anything.
He shook his head with a smile as he watched you go, nearly tripping over a cobble stone even in your flat shoes.
“Y/N/N, be careful.”
You stood at the end of the alley watching Harry still standing there with a fond smile.
“C’mon! I hear music.” You urged him.
So he came.
He wandered over to you casually, feeling like he had all the time in the world to spend with you. Every moment of his was now yours and he couldn’t be happier to share them all with you. You. He sometimes couldn’t believe he’d managed to end up with you.
You held out a hand for him and he took it, slinking his fingers through yours.
You hummed in delight and the both of you walked in silence, off towards the vibrant music of the city to dance the night to new beginnings.
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coffebuns · 6 months ago
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paint ur partner challenge!
@wiolettame said: “My personal headcanon is that Arthur’s ‘doing his best’ art looks like wonky ass medieval style art with no perspective”
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wondergirlsthings · 3 days ago
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Gelato & A Little Bit of Fate
Kenan Yildiz x Reader
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The warm summer air of Turin wraps around you as you stroll down a cobblestone street, taking in the charm of your new home. Moving here for medical school had been overwhelming, but tonight, you decided to explore—no textbooks, no stress, just you and the city.
The sweet scent of freshly made gelato pulls you toward a small, cozy gelateria tucked between two old buildings. The soft hum of conversation and clinking spoons fills the air as you step inside, scanning the menu. Pistachio or hazelnut? You debate your options when—
BAM.
You walk straight into someone. Ice-cold gelato smears across your arm, and a deep voice lets out a surprised chuckle.
“Whoa, you okay?”
You glance up, heart skipping a beat. The guy in front of you is tall, dark curls peeking from under a cap, a sharp jawline, and warm brown eyes filled with amusement. He’s familiar, but your brain short-circuits before you can place him.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” you say, stepping back.
He grins, glancing down at his now slightly melted gelato. “You know, there are smoother ways to ask for a bite.”
Your face heats up. “I promise I wasn’t trying to steal your gelato.”
He tilts his head, playfully serious. “Hmm. I don’t know. You look like you had a game plan.”
You laugh, finally putting the pieces together. Kenan Yildiz. Juventus’ rising star. Of course.
“I was actually debating between pistachio and hazelnut,” you admit. “And then, well… collision.”
He smirks. “That’s a tough choice. But since fate made you bump into me, I’d say you deserve an expert opinion.” He holds out his cup. “Try mine.”
Your eyes flick between him and the spoon. “Are you always this generous with your gelato?”
Kenan leans in slightly, his voice dropping teasingly. “Only for people who crash into me in tiny gelaterias.”
You take a small bite, the creamy hazelnut melting on your tongue. “Okay, I see why you’re the expert.”
“Told you,” he grins. “So, do I get to know the name of the person who nearly knocked me out?”
You smile, introducing yourself.
“Well, now that we’re practically gelato soulmates, how about I make up for my loss by getting you a cup?” he offers. “Consider it a ‘welcome to Turin’ gift.”
You raise a brow. “Flirting over ice cream? Bold strategy.”
Kenan chuckles, handing the cashier his card. “Hey, if it works, it works.”
And judging by the way your heart races as he hands you your gelato, it’s definitely working.
This was requested
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renonv · 1 year ago
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I’m trying to cook another ATLA au and Mr. Patel has been on my mind lately so… Lovino’s fire bending mentor time lets goooo
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