#myventureto
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“But firmness of faith allows me to truly rid myself of the lie that this world or any title it could give will satisfy.“
aka
God will give you a peace that the world cannot give.
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I struggle with this every day. I look for fulfillment in things and status and what i should “be” right now. If only I could remember I will never be satisfied on this earth. I will only be satisfied with my Father in heaven. Then I could let go of so much. I pray God continues to speak to me though devotionals and studying scripture.
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i can succeed at this fucking test and when i do, i’m going to live the life that i want and DESERVE.
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wow, can i really dream that big?
can i dream to have all those things/circumstances and dream even bigger than that? i probably have small wants compared to others. maybe, just maybe in 6 months it could be true. maybe!!!! the fantasy of it is so intriguing.
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sad news again. didn’t pass again. hoping that i don’t lose my faith in His plan. i hope that i can be better this time, in all areas. pray even harder, believe even more, and study as diligently as i can.
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2019
the new year is here and i am glad. maybe this will be the bigger and better year than last. hopefully. prayerfully.
Lord, I lift up my family, husband, and dogs. Please let us flourish in good health, good fortune, success, good days and nights, and love every single moment. I pray this year is fulfilling and filled with positive changes in my life.
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What I want you to hear in today’s readings, sisters, is that God multiplies our generosity in ways we can never imagine: “They shall eat and there shall be some left over.” (2 Kings 4:43) We need not fear giving away those things to which we cling so fiercely. You might not be clinging to strawberries, but perhaps there is something else on your heart of which God is gently urging you to let go.
https://blessedisshe.net/devotion/on-strawberries-and-true-generosity/ via @blessedisshe__
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In today’s Gospel, Christ is instructing His disciples on being honest and not needing an oath to be people of their word. (Matthew 5:37) I hear that and feel it encouraging me also to make decisions and form healthy, holy habits so I don’t waiver and waffle and flippity-flop all throughout the day. Say yes to a morning prayer routine that’s feasible for this season of your life.
https://blessedisshe.net/devotion/yes-to-the-rosary-no-to-the-bad-boyfriend/?mc_cid=0ced66fc62&mc_eid=b3332d6a58
Note to self:
Form healthy, holy habits so I don’t waiver and waffle...
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Good reminder of why it is important to go to Mass with your family:
“For the little things, where I know I’m just holding on to that bit of frustration or resentment, we have a system conveniently built right into the Mass. We recite the Lord’s Prayer, and ask God to “forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Then we exchange the sign of peace. There I am in the pew, surrounded by all my near occasions of sin whom I love so much, and I can look them each in the eye and kiss them peace. I can forgive them and be forgiven, and be reconciled to them, and then approach the altar to receive the Eucharist.And I can do it all over again the next week (or the next day) as needed. I just love it when a plan comes together.”
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peace with what i’m doing and what i’ve chosen for myself.
it’s ironic, isn’t it? everything i complain (silently or not so silently) i chose for myself. i decided to put my loyalty and priorities toward one direction only - family. duh. it’s not fair for me to put that on others. that’s playing the victim and i hate that shit. yet this process of studying has made me this even whinier person who although said all the right stuff before starting - all the encouraging, positive-minded phrases i was supposed to say - is constantly complaining and worrying and whining about this horrible thing. what else can i do? i chose this. i chose this path. i knew that i had to take a test at the end of it. i just never though the days would come. story of my life. time flies. i need to remember that time flies and in a few months, i’ll also be looking back at this after finishing the test, maybe even after the results and feeling completely defeated, and i’ll have to remember, through the good and bad, i chose this. as an adult, i need to take responsibility that i chose where i am. (God). it’ll be okay either way. that’s what i always say too :) but thing i also always say is “we’ll see!”
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In the past, I remember praying for a holy family. One year into my marriage, while looking at an image of the Holy Family, I realized that they do not represent the husband, the wife and their child. Mary, Joseph and Jesus represented the husband and wife, with Christ at the center. I realized at that moment, this is the one thing we need for a holy family.
http://www.spokenbride.com/blog/2018/5/8/the-sophia-series-marisol-b
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God Himself equips us with the self-control, love, and power we need. Sometimes what we need to do is just slow it down, pray, process what we want to say, and make sure that what we say comes from a place of love. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide your thoughts and words. He will guard your tongue from imprudence and supply you with the wisdom you need.
https://blessedisshe.net/devotion/breathe-and-then-speak/ via @blessedisshe__
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I belong to Him, and it is only right that I give my life to Him in all I do and everything I am.
https://blessedisshe.net/devotion/it-all-belongs-to-god/ via @blessedisshe__
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beautiful. simply beautiful!
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YES to everything here.
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..openness
it’s been awhile since i was inspired to write more or even share more. all of my posts are planned and for the most part well-thought out. but now, listening to all these podcasts, reading all these blogs, i see how the flood of information at my fingertips must be recorded in a way that i can read about later.
here’s what i want to share today from the evangelista blog:
“Quite a few people have asked me if marriage is everything I hoped it would be. The answer is, as always, “yes...and no.” Yes, it is wonderful and freeing* and so much FUN to live life with your husband day in and day out. But I didn’t expect how healing and challenging and purifying it would be--even though many of my married friends told me it would be. Kristian has taught me to rest in his love, to receive love even when I feel unworthy of it, to stop interrupting and LISTEN before responding, to pay attention to the ebb and flow of his emotional state and learn the cues for when he’s hungry or tired and just needs a break. He’s also taught me to be more spontaneous, romantic, and joyful. I didn’t savor life quite as much as I do now, and that is in large part thanks to my dear husband.”
https://www.theevangelista.com/newlywed-life/2017/6/28/learning-to-love-lessons-from-the-first-six-months-of-marriage
this really spoke to me. this month is our 9th month of marriage. it’s been an educational and interesting journey so far. even when the days are boring or frustrating because of all of the things and STUFF, it is a comfort to me to have him here. the phrase “rest in his love” is beautiful. that’s what he is to me and has been - my comfort, my peace, my joy, my REST. thankful to have found writings that describe how i feel about him and our relationship thus far.
i am happy to have found this new space to share my heart.
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