#mylifemychoice

[sandymacacua]

Is it single shaming? | 04 June 2023

As a single woman turning 30 this year, I always get asked why I'm not married and why I'm still single. I used to shrug it off before, but recently, I started feeling irritated by these questions. These questions get under my skin and make me feel like something is wrong with me. They also remind me of societal pressures to conform to a certain norm, which can be overwhelming and at times, unbearable.

The truth is, the decision to get married or be in a relationship is a personal one. It's not something that should be forced or rushed. Every person has their own timeline for when they want to settle down, and it's not something that should be judged or questioned by others.

When people ask me why I'm not married or why I'm still single, it feels like they're implying that there's something wrong with me. It's a hurtful assumption that can be damaging to one's self-esteem. It's not fair to assume that someone's relationship status is a reflection of their worth.

I understand that people may ask these questions out of curiosity or concern, but it's important to recognize that they can be hurtful and invasive.

Remember, your relationship status does not define your worth as a person. You are valuable and deserving of respect and love, regardless of whether or not you're in a relationship. Eventually, the right person will come along at the right time.

Warmest salaams, Sandy

[charlaxdresser]

I'm tickled pink tonight 💖💗💗💟

[brokenglassrainynights]

my choice

Don’t you dare tell me not to kill myself because it would hurt you. You don’t wake up every morning feeling like its groundhog day the same shitty day after the next. I see everyone around me living and I am stuck living the same day over and over. There is no light in my days people around me may see light at the end of the tunnel but I don’t. I know how my story ends and don’t think you can change that. I have come to turns with my life and I don’t need your acceptance in that but don’t you dare make it about you.

[elamansworld]

ORDINARY  LADY FOR AN EXTRA ORDINARY DESTINY

Ordinary lady for AN EXTRAORDINARY DESTINY.

I am the eldest among 3 siblings.Came from a broken family and became the bread winner of the family at the age of 10. Experienced a lot of hardships all the way, from selling plastic bags in the public market, carrier of baggage/ stuffs  of tourist sand to  all orund errand girl. I finished secondary level at the age of 15 and did not pursue tertiary since it was impossible for me due to the status of my life (financially incapable). We do not have our own house so we became NPA  ( no permanent address )  . We only stayed anywhere where there is free accommodation like for instance our relatives who needs someone to take care of their houses while waiting for it  to be sold. We were taken by a rich man  who has hectares of land and needs someone to look after it and that is where we camped and stayed with no electricity and proper shelter. We used woods to cooked our foods, dug a hole to be our toilet and walk a thousand meters to fetch water from a spring. We are already lucky enough if we can complete 3 meals a day. I hated my life so much that I became rebellious .I  asked God why do I need to suffer like this and what did I  do wrong for him to punished me? I became a mother of 2 handsome boys at a very young age. I gave  birth to my sons when I was 17 and 18 . I was offered to work as DH in UAE and grabbed that opportunity to runaway with my sufferings not knowing that it will be  worst than hell out there. I was deployed without legal documents at hand and did not go to the "normal" process of leaving the country as OFW. I was 19 that time and so innocent of everything so I just go with the flow and that is my worst nightmare! I  was also put in jail by my previous employer accusing me of theft before running away . After a month , I was freed. I was sold to different employers every now and then  , so when I got a chance I runaway. I stayed together with my fellow Filipino runaway housemaids.  We became friends however we were also taken advantage of our own people -Filipinos. My family  could do nothing since I do not have records in our local government. I thought I will no longer see my family and my kids. February 2013, UAE offered amnesty program to every TNT/overstayed /aliens of their country and that is where I am able to go back home alive to my family and kids. I could not imagine how I was able to survive and continue living out there but I am very grateful with what and who I am right now. I never gave up with my life. Because of my experiences abroad I became stronger resilient and steadfast. I did not waste anytime and immediately looked for a job. I worked as merchandiser for a year, sales agent for 3 months and spend most of my years as vegetable packer in La Trinidad Benguet. 2016 when I was hired as a call center representative. My life became different. Life started to be better, I was able to rent a good room for my family, provide all basic needs and especially to give a comfortable life to my kids. Presently I am still working in BPO industry and taking my studies  at the same time. It is not easy but compared  to what I've been through it's nothing.  Some says it is no longer necessary for me to enroll in College since I am 30 and my kids are already teenagers and I should not prove nothing since my existence is already enough . You know what? They are wrong! It is my dream to have a degree and to show my kids how important education is.

[sharingthoughts]

Motherhood is not every Woman’s Calling

I saw this quote while scrolling through my Insta the other day, and felt validated and positively recognized by it. Then I had one of this conversations today at work: My colleague, 56, female, Bulgarian, told me during lunch break, after my other colleague told her I didn’t want to have children, that I would “be like a tree” if I didn’t. Now, while this very insulting simily might be somewhat explained by language barriers, she still intented to say what it core means, namely that I wouldn’t truly live, if I stay children-less.

How come in 2020, I still have to have this discussion? Which, to be fair, I refused to have by simply refusing to actually argue but just staying silent or agreeing with her, because I really didn’t feel like justifying my choice. But it was more than pride. It was more even than not wanting to get in a fight, although I do tend to avoid conflicts. It was guilt, because I new if I said everything that came to my mind, all the reasons I have to not have children, that would crack her world view. Or it would at least give her a bad image of me -- as a bad woman, as lazy, as selfish, as not fulfilling my predetermined role. Now the question comes to mind, why I would care? If she doesn’t accept my world view, why do I need to respect hers? Well, maybe, because I am more considerate of her. Because I can accept different world views and life plans existing next to each other, and therefore don’t feel the need to tear down every life plan that differs from mine. And because I new from the beginning, that to argue would be pointless.

But that too makes me sad, and frustrated, and feel not taken seriously. Because what is it with the boomers, that they cannot accept that us Gen Y kids have a different idea of what we want from life? Just because you are older, doesn’t give you the right to tell me how to live my life. And just because you are older, doesn’t mean everything I say and believe in is stupid and naiv. Like, at least listen and try to understand where I’m coming from. Then you would have heard, that I don’t want to have children in a world that is literally dying in front of our eyes (#climatecatastrophe), and that is most likely going to get wrapped up in ugly and all-encompassing hybrid war over power and resources, and democratic and liberal values will be gone soon enough. She also would have heard that I am already exhausted, from simply looking after myself, and that I really cannot imagine looking after somebody else 24/7 and putting them first always. Like, for the rest of my life.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind children, at all. And I would love to babysit for family and friends, if they need it, for an afternoon or a Saturday or sometimes even the whole weekend, but that is very different. A very different responsibility, and more importantly, a very different time frame.

So, really, why can’t people just accept that not every woman is made to be a mother? And that we are not worse women for it. And that we will still manage to find a purpose and fulfillment and happiness and joy and love in our lives. And that they probably don’t want us to become mothers, since we probably won’t make good ones because it is not what we want from life.

As with the whole pro life vs pro choice debate, this is my take on this: It is okay to have a very clear plan for your life. It is okay to have a plan that differs from mine or from those of the majority of people. It is, however, NOT okay to expect everyone to follow the same plan, and to pressure them into it. Let people make their own life choices. I don’t hurt you by not having kids. In fact, it doesn’t affect you at all. So stop butting in, and accept that I have my own world view, my own opinion, and my own way of life.

[yourlivelyhealthlove]

I am an eternal learner!!! Grateful to make history for the first ever #upwvirtual2020 with the Master himself @tonyrobbins ❤❤❤ All change come when you change your association. I choose to push myself to be OUTSTANDING ❤ #noexcuses #eternallearner #mylifemychoice #sickbutdoingit #masteryourlife #learnfromthebests #lovingthisnewme❤ https://www.instagram.com/p/CCzuRBVnitpaxQBqaNPMQNfA4FgjxxZv1SUTRM0/?igshid=1gav18864r7a

[s-o-u-m-y-a-a]

Life can take several twist and turns. The best way to live life is to never plan things. Just do what you feel is correct and you feel happy about. 😇

[focus-skinnybibi]

My obsession

I'm so obsessed with being skinny right now that nothing can stop me from achieving my goal. My body, my goals. My focal point is to loose as much weight as I can before June. This is a goal I must attain and prove to myself I can indeed do anything.

[findingmyselffollowingmylight]

Letting It Out.

Well, its been awhile since I been on here. Haven't shared nor reblogged much of anything. I apologize, we all know life can get hectic. Anyway, some good news that always gets me excited; coming up on my 2 year anniversary with Ulta soon and I’m so excited. one being the reason I’ve never worked somewhere for more than a few months. So yes I’m jumping for all joy when it comes to this. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes they drive me frickin nuts but that's what you face when you work with nothing but emotional and uncertain females! now I’m not frontin like i don't have my days cause I assure you I do, but hey what are you gonna do. Upon my anniversary coming up, I finally got the opportunity to work at a company doing receptionist work and to be honest; I’m loving it. so much more chill, helpful and inviting. oh and real responsibility! all things I like. With only being my first week, I’m still grasping the ropes on everything but I feel like in a couple more days, I’ll be confident, comfortable and more outgoing! I can be shy when I first start a new job. I was like that at first at Ulta but one day I broke out my shell and look at me now Lead Cashier coming up on 2 years with the company. I haven’t really had the chance to applaud myself on my achievements. So as I’m sure you all have figured out that’s what I’m currently doing in this here post! I like having two jobs, granted it can become hectic at times but once you learn to balance it right along with your daily routine in life. It becomes much easier. Finally things are starting to look up and I couldn’t be more happier. I’m all in. Like they say, whatever it takes right!? :)

[multiverse60]

You don't have to live in that bnb place of darkness anymore. #sickandtired #lookingformore #mylifemychoice #jimmyp60 Follow4Follow @jimmyp60 (at Warner Robins, Georgia) https://www.instagram.com/p/B296FMcgxxu/?igshid=1rn7r2s5miohp

[pepette2369]

#bisexual #bisexual🌈 #bisexuality #lgbt #lgbtq #stereotypes #mylifemyrules #mylifemychoice https://www.instagram.com/p/B2XTXQDC6QR/?igshid=fng6qg6bymu

[charlaxdresser]

this will make any guy turn red...🤣🤣

[princesscindyrina]

Shower me with all your love.😍😘 It's short and good experience for me. #princesscindyrina #farewell #bouquet #flowersbouquet #showmeyourlove #lovelyday #friday #lifestyleblogger #iamleaving #officelife #livinglifehappily #mylifemychoice #myfirsttime #omg #weekend https://www.instagram.com/p/Bp9C52dnvQ0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=4h8t3zlir07v

[maxyeo]

"Don't Set Your Goals By What Other People Deem Important" - Jaachynma N.E. Agu 𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗦𝗵𝗼𝗿𝘁, 𝗟𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗟𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗪𝗮𝘆 𝗢𝗻 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗧𝗲𝗿𝗺𝘀. Your Goals Belong to You. Would You Be Happy Achieving Other People's Goals, especially if it is not in line with Your Own? Your Spouse Wants You to be ______ Your Parents Want You to be ______ Your Child Wants You to be ______ Your Friends Want You to be ______ Ultimately, You'll only be Truly Happy with What You Want to be... #BeYou #BeYourself #BeYourselfAlways #BestYou #YourBest #YourBestLife #YourLife #YourLifeYourWay #MyLife #MyLifeMyRules #MyLifeMyWay #MyLifeMyChoice #MyGoals #Goals #Goal #GoalSetting #BeHappy #BeHappyWithYourself #FitnessGoals #RelationshipGoals #FinancialGoals #CoupleGoals #FriendshipGoals #FamilyGoals #CoupleGoals #PersonalGoals #LifeGoals https://www.instagram.com/p/CVz0-snp8g0/?utm_medium=tumblr

[elamansworld]

ORDINARY LADY for an EXTRAORDINARY DESTINY

I am the eldest among 3 siblings.Came from a broken family and became the bread winner of the family at the age of 10. Experienced a lot of hardships all the way, from selling plastic bags in the public market, carrier of baggage/ stuffs  of tourists and to  all around errand girl. I finished secondary level at the age of 15 and did not pursue tertiary since it was impossible for me due to the status of my life (financially incapable). We do not have our own house so we became NPA  ( no permanent address )  . We only stayed anywhere where there is free accommodation like for instance our relatives who needs someone to take care of their houses while waiting for it  to be sold. We were taken by a rich man  who has hectares of land and needs someone to look after it and that is where we camped and stayed with no electricity and proper shelter. We used woods to cooked our foods, dug a hole to be our toilet and walk a thousand meters to fetch water from a spring. We are already lucky enough if we can complete 3 meals a day. I hated my life so much that I became rebellious .I  asked God why do I need to suffer like this and what did I  do wrong for him to punished me? I became a mother of 2 handsome boys at a very young age. I gave  birth to my sons when I was 17 and 18 . I was offered to work as DH in UAE and grabbed that opportunity to runaway with my sufferings not knowing that it will be  worst than hell out there. I was deployed without legal documents at hand and did not go to the "normal" process of leaving the country as OFW. I was 19 that time and so innocent of everything so I just go with the flow and that is my worst nightmare! I  was also put in jail by my previous employer accusing me of theft before running away . After a month , I was freed. I was sold to different employers every now and then  , so when I got a chance I runaway. I stayed together with my fellow Filipino runaway housemaids.  We became friends however we were also taken advantage of our own people -Filipinos. My family  could do nothing since I do not have records in our local government. I thought I will no longer see my family and my kids. February 2013, UAE offered amnesty program to every TNT/overstayed /aliens of their country and that is where I am able to go back home alive to my family and kids. I could not imagine how I was able to survive and continue living out there but I am very grateful with what and who I am right now. I never gave up with my life. Because of my experiences abroad I became stronger resilient and steadfast. I did not waste anytime and immediately looked for a job. I worked as merchandiser for a year, sales agent for 3 months and spend most of my years as vegetable packer in La Trinidad Benguet. 2016 when I was hired as a call center representative. My life became different. Life started to be better, I was able to rent a good room for my family, provide all basic needs and especially to give a comfortable life to my kids. Presently I am still working in BPO industry and taking my studies  at the same time. It is not easy but compared  to what I've been through it's nothing.  Some says it is no longer necessary for me to enroll in College since I am 30 and my kids are already teenagers and I should not prove nothing since my existence is already enough . You know what? They are wrong! It is my dream to have a degree and to show my kids how important education is.

[undallesdazwischen]

Soulfood

Hallo, lange nichts gehört von einander. Joa, ich habe es immer noch stressig. Ist schon fast normal geworden. So normal, das ich runterrum endlich auch wieder Zeit für andere Sachen finde. Für wichtige Sachen, für mich selber z.B.

Ich habe mich gehen lassen. Eigentlich sogar schon seit fast 11 jahren. Ich bin fett geworden in der Zeit. Aber laut meinem BMI bin ich nun nicht mehr fett. Die Arbeit der letzten Monate zahlt sich so langsam aus. Ich bin immer noch dick, aber ich denke/hoffe nicht mehr lange. Ich bin dabei abzunehmen und es wird ganz langsam was. Langsam ist anscheinend so mein Ding. Wo ich ja ach so geduldig bin (Ironie ende). Aber soll ich euch was sagen, es ist gut so. Langsam abnehmen ist nämlich viel gesünder. Schnell abnehmen hat meißtens den JoJo-Effekt, das man ganz schnell wieder alles drauf hat. Bei mir geht es schön langsam runter. Ich dokomentiere es und lerne mich so wunderbar noch besser selber kennen. Natürlich schwankt die Waage, aber ich lerne es zu verstehen, warum und wie und vorallem warum manchmal so doll (ca.2 Kilo mal +1 und mal -1 Kilo). Positiver Nebeneffekt: durch den ganzen Sport fühle ich mich einfach viel viel besser. Also wirklich viel viel besser. Ich hatte lange keine krassen Rückenschmerzen mehr und der Muskelkater geht auch immer schneller weg. Und, ich fühle mich stark, also richtig stark. =D I Love it!! =D <3

Was gibt es sonst noch so...

Achja, unser Haus und die Kernsanierung

Oder auch

Eine unendliche Geschichte

Mal machen wir einen großen Sprung und es fühlt sich an, als ob wir fast fertig sind und denn kommt der nächste Step und der zieht sich und zieht sich und zieht sich. Diese Woche kommen die Plasterer. Wir haben die letzten 2 Wochen oder so alles mögliche dafür vorbereitet und so unheimlich viel Material gekauft. Achja und morgen kommt unser Bett endlich. Nach über 2 Monaten... Ich kaufe nie wieder was beim dänischen Bettenlager. Die brauchen mir echt zu lange. Beim bezahlen haben die 3 Wochen gesagt.

Was gibt es sonst noch: Achja... Wie formuliere ich es am besten ohne gegen die neuen DSGVO zu verstoßen? hahahha

Da git es eine erwachsene Frau, die sich wie ein dummer Teenager verhält und ohne scheiß, ich muss ständig über die lachen. Selten sowas kindisches erlebt. Nun denkt sie, sie hat es mir gezeigt, indem sie mich bei Facebook geblockt hat. AHAHHAHAHAH ich lach mich tot. Was stimmt mit der nicht? Läster ruhig weiter über mich. Du erheiterst mich!

So, das war es für´s Erste. Ich muss noch was tun!

Have a nice day Bitches! <3